#the man is 200 u can be straight this whole time

[princessbutler1316]

Woke: Oh, but Deadpool never gave any signs that he was LGBTQ+

Deadpool:

Woke: But Wolverine doesn't either

Wolverine:

[chithereader]

playing it cool / aaron hotchner

[credits to the owners of these photos!!]

word count: 1.9k

pairing: aaron hotchner x f!reader

genre: fluff!!!!!!

cw: sickeningly sweet and soft aaron x reader, so much of aaron’s thoughts because we know that man thinks soo much more than he speaks!!

a/n: hiiii this is my third post so far and tbh i was so nervous to post the first two as that was my first time ever posting any of my writings anywhere!! but i’ve been getting so much more love on those than expected and i just really wanted to say thank you so much for all the likes and reblogs <33 i was honestly only expecting less than 10 notes as a newbie and reaching up to 200 is so so so wonderful. and especially for the love of hotch i– ugh!!!!! i already love u all 

The team had worked a straight 5 weeks worth of cases prior, which had warranted Strauss to grant them all a mandatory 3-day rest. This simply meant that for 3 whole days there are no cases, no deadlines, and no new case files. They could come to the office at whatever time they’d like as long as they finished some reports at the end of the day. 

Aaron being Hotch the boss man still aimed to arrive at the office at a reasonable time– 7:30am. To be fair, this is an hour and a half later than when he usually arrives at the office. And in his mind, the earlier he arrives, the more he can get done, and the more he gets done, the earlier he can come home. 

This is the only reason why he is up at 6:00am on a supposed rest day. He did expect that he’d struggle a bit more to drag himself out of bed, knowing you’d be keeping him hostage with limbs that wrap around him in ways he can’t begin to understand, but to his surprise, you weren’t there. 

Dragging his feet across the carpeted floor, his pajama pants hanging low on his hips and white shirt fitting him oh-so-snugly, he tries to find you. He’s rubbing the sleep of his eyes as he peeks his head into your shared bathroom. No sign of you. 

He’s covering his mouth as he yawns when he quietly opens the door to Jack’s bedroom–still no sign of you. Remembering his son has been nursing a stomach bug since yesterday, he opened the door further to check on him. No fever. No chills. No sign of discomfort. 

When he’s sure Jack’s okay, he turns around to go back to find where you went. He even checked the backyard as he passed by a window to see if you’re at your favorite swing reading, that perhaps you just woke up early and wanted to feel the morning sun because you claimed it lightens you. 

He smiles a little to himself as he treads downstairs, finally hearing your soft murmurs as you spoke with someone presumably over the phone. As he neared the kitchen he realized that the person on the line was your colleague and friend Tilly, and that she was on speaker phone making it easy to listen in. 

He slows down his steps as he nears the landing and pauses when he gets behind a wall near the kitchen. He doesn’t know what came over him. He doesn’t usually sneak around to eavesdrop, nor did he ever feel the need to especially when it came to you. You tell him everything, prompted and unprompted. 

But perhaps it was the haze of the morning or the curiosity of what could possibly get you out of bed this early when you’re usually the one snoozing away as he’s getting ready for work– he stayed quiet behind that wall and made it his mission to understand the conversation. 

He clears his mind and strains his ear, going as far as making his breaths slow and far apart. 

He hears Tilly giggling, “Don’t get me wrong, Adam from Finance is really cute but.. isn’t he just a little too serious? He’s always got that frown going on.” 

You sigh a little loudly, obvious that it’s a sigh to humor and not of exasperation, “Tilly, you know I love you, but every day you complain about being single. And every other day there’s a decent guy who you always always find that one flaw in that just crosses them off for you forever.” Tilly lets out a sound that’s a mixture of a laugh and a gasp. 

“That is so not tr–” “Oh, Hugh’s just too clean. And Frederick’s too hard, it’s like- scary. Yes, veiny hands are hot but there’s veiny and too veiny, and Jason was just a double too veiny.” 

Aaron momentarily pauses his listening and looks down at his hands, suddenly conscious where he fit in that category. Factoring in his age, his work, and the action he gets from the field– these all show. He tried thinking of a time you could’ve shown any dislike or disgust towards his hands but all he could think of was that one night when he cupped your face and you leaned towards it more, turning slightly to take his thumb into your mou–

He’s shaken out of his thoughts when he hears Tilly asking about you leaving, “What time are you getting to the office by the way? I just don’t want to get there without you. Adam might ask about that second date and I just need you as my bluff, my beautiful girl.” He makes a mental note to message Jessica before you both get ready for work. 

“Riiiight. Remind me how many guys have I scared off for you now? And how many times have I helped you scare them off? Besides, I can’t go today and I’ve already told Bobby I’m on leave.” 

In a slight surprise and panic Tilly whines, “What?! Why? You’re such a traitor. You know damn well I get so bored without you.” Aaron didn’t even know you were planning on staying home. You hadn’t mentioned anything about it last night which made him even more curious what made you decide. 

He hears your soft laugh, “Don’t be so dramatic. You’ll manage a day without me. I mean you have to– my son caught a stomach bug yesterday so I just want to make sure he’ll recover completely.” 

Aaron can hear Tilly responding, something about soup and warm baths, but his heart has just stopped so he’s not really processing any new words at the moment. 

My son. My son. My son. My son caught a stomach bug. 

He feels lightheaded. His heart kickstarts again, his pulse is ringing in his ear. He can feel his chest pounding to his heart’s beat. The words that rolled off your lips so effortlessly, so mindlessly, echoes in his head. 

Jack may be young but he is smart. So so smart beyond his years. And he has grown to understand what had happened to his mom Haley, but not once has he– and even you allowed Jack to forget who Haley is and how much she loves him. 

Images of you joining in their traditions of honoring and remembering Haley plays in his head in flashes. You helping Jack arrange a bouquet for Haley’s death anniversary. You helping Jack make a card for her birthday. You mixing the paint to get the right shades as Jack paints a portrait of Haley for his Mothers’ Day homework. 

Aaron had told you everything there was to know about Haley and you’ve listened. He knows you adore her. You adore her for the same reasons he adored her. You understood the space Haley had in his life and in Jack’s life, and not once were you ever jealous, immature, or selfish about it. Even though he would’ve completely understood if you were. 

You were nothing but supportive, and understanding, and loving. Even when he didn’t deserve it. Even when you deserved better. Admittedly, there was a point in time when he struggled with coming to terms with falling in love– with you nonetheless. You’re young, ambitious, brilliant, talented, insanely beautiful, and unfairly kind. 

When the two of you had met, this was his profile: divorced with a kid, recovering from trauma that stemmed from being stabbed multiple times in his own home, emotionally unavailable, annoyingly serious and fatally dull– which really makes him wonder what made you fall in love with him in the first place, and even more so what made you stay even when he was bafflingly dense about how you felt about him.  

He didn’t know how long he was standing there, like a deer caught in headlights. Replaying your words and his memories over and over again, slowly coming to the conclusion that you’re absolutely perfect and he’s absolutely gone for you. 

Slowly coming to his senses, Aaron becomes more aware of the silence. The call must have ended while he was having realizations about things. He rounds the corner silently, getting a feel of where you’re facing. Luckily he guesses right, that you’re facing away from him. 

You were rummaging through the fridge– the vegetable drawer if he had to guess, judging by how much you’re slouching and reaching, and the sound of the glass containers you use to prolong their freshness. 

He quickly surveys the scene- your phone is on the counter, beside it is a chopping board with carrots and onions, a carton of chicken broth, Jack’s favorite dinosaur-shaped pasta, and chocolate milk– the one drink you both know can make Jack feel instantly better, happier. 

His heart pinches again. You got up early to make sure Jack had something to eat for breakfast in time for his medicine. You got up early even though you aren’t planning on going to work. You aren’t going to work because you want to stay with Jack. You called Jack your son. 

With so many things running in his head, he stands quietly observing you finding god knows whatever vegetable. Maybe it's the intensity of his stare or the volume of his thoughts, or maybe he started to breathe loudly– but suddenly you knew he was there. He could tell. 

You slowly straightened your back from when you were leaning. Your hands have stopped rummaging through the drawer, and he could see the goosebumps on your legs and shoulders from the way the sunlight hits you through the kitchen window. 

You turn around slowly, as if you were just caught doing something you aren’t supposed to be doing, “I’m so sorry, did I wake you?” grimacing as if it was a crime to be hot and cute and gut-wrenchingly-sweet. 

“No.” His voice is groggy. Deep and rough given that he just woke up minutes ago and hasn’t really used it since. Looking at you through studying eyes, he clears his throat “Uhm, I woke up to get ready for work and you weren’t there.” 

Aaron suddenly feels a little cold. The thin material of his shirt and pajamas doing little to contain what warmth he has left in his body. Or maybe it’s you, maybe his body has sensed that you’re near and is now craving your warmth, making him feel a magnified amount of its absence.

“Oh.. I’m sorry I just wanted to get ahead of cooking so Jack can have soup before he takes his medicine at 8 and since I was also planning to do some work though I’m on leave, it just made sense to get an early start…” You slow your words, noticing how Hotch is studying you tenfold in the moment, as if you were an apparition, “Are you okay? Did you want soup too? I can pack you some before you go?”

His silence makes you panic a little. You can’t really tell if he’s upset about something or if he’s sleepwalking, “Or you can eat here. I mean– you live here, of course you can eat here. I mean like instead of bringing it to the office– not that if you eat here, you can’t bring some anymore.” 

The longer he stays silent, adoring you, the more you scramble to fill the silence, “I’m just– you know you can do whatever you want. You can eat here, there, anywhere. Unless you don’t want soup. I mean we still have leftover steak, I cou–” 

You pause your rambling because you can see a smile starting to form on his face. A real, big smile. Laugh lines and dimples and all, which makes you smile. Realizing how stupid you were sounding and how funny the situation was becoming, you started giggling.

And just as you think he’s about to join the laughter to make fun of you, his smile softens and he says, “Marry me.” 

part 2 here!!!!!

[askyuuandco]

My Yuu, when she learns about Malleus's absence in Dorm Leader meetings and she's just being a b*tch to them all (malleus isn't 100% safe either) and sick of their garbage

-------

My Yuu: So let me get this straight. A man who lives in an area that has been stuck in an 18th century time capsule that has no modern technology what so ever like cars and other stuff, a man who is fear by many and not feared by a select few due to his high level magical powers, like literally everyone runs away from this man, and you thought it was a good idea to give him emails and digital letters that he doesn't understand and read???...HAHAHAHA!!!

Riddle: Well, when you put it like that, you make it seem like we are idiots

My Yuu: Oh no, you are idiots. That's exactly what I'm saying. I am making fun of you all. :D

Vil: excuse-

My Yuu: Your excused Vil :)

Vil: 😡

My Yuu: Malleus dear, how many phones have broken?

Malleus: um 200 I think?

Idia: *faints*

My Yuu: and thought it was wise to give emails?

Azul: but Lilia, Silver, and Sebek literally know how to use a phone and live in the same area! How come he gets a pass but they don't?

My Yuu: Silver and Sebek are around the same as all of us here and grew up with the same things parents didn't deprive them of anything. Lilia is probably 600-700 years old in human years and travels a lot on a daily basis, meaning he's one of the few fae that got a full and complete understanding of modern technology. Malleus has been stuck in a castle and 1 continent for 178 years and hasn't had left that spot, forced to stay by himself most of the time and no interaction with other people or children his age. The only reason why he's even in this freaking school is to make friends and learn about modern human culture as a whole. And you lots thought it was a good idea to be rude. How mature of you :D

Azul: I have no further questions ;w;'///

Malleus: so am I not in trouble?

My Yuu: Oh no. You are in trouble, young man, for the number of phones you have broken and staying in 1 place for 1-2 hours at a time, and temperament issues

Malleus: :(

Leona: Ha!-

My Yuu: Leona Kingscholar, you say 1 more word and send you to the gods, but you'll probably be sent to hell instead. Do u wish to die right now? Because i can grant you that wish. Don't test me. 😡

Leona: ...

My Yuu: and you know what you all as dormheads lack basic teamwork skills anyway as to wonder why your dorms never get along is because you guys never get along I'm this close on rage quitting on all of you because I am so done with your bull crap

Kalim: but your fingers are touching

My Yuu: exactly. :D

Dormheads: >x> ...

My Yuu: :]

Dormheads: we'll fix it

My Yuu: glad to hear :D

Crowley: *shaking behind the group*

Dormheads: so much for our 'generous headmaster' =_=

[the-hype-dragon]

about 200 pages into No Exit, which I bought last year after seeing the trailer for the movie adaptation

(this post is long and rambling)

let me preface this by saying I don't read a whole lot of thrillers because the genre doesn't impress me in general. I loved Red Dragon and Silence of the Lambs but I consider those horror novels instead of just straight thriller novels. for all I know No Exit is a very typical thriller but if all thrillers are written like this I will just go on being unimpressed by the genre

iirc I remember reading some review saying it was like a Stephen King book... correct. Taylor Adams makes as many Thing of the Cultural Moment references as King does, which instantly makes the book very dated. it was published in 2017 (though my paperback is copyrighted for 2019, so I was under the false impression it was much more recent lmao). there is a Pokemon Go! reference early on, a reference to the 2014 Godzilla movie, and a Max Payne (!!!) reference much later, all delivered in a very "how do u do fellow kids" kind of way lmao

also in typical King fashion the villains are so over the top they're unbelievable and the writing is about as subtle as a brick to your face

case in point: the symbolism is very in-your-face and not very clever. the author also enjoys smacking you in the face with "revelations" that are just "see I did a clever thing, reader!" In one scene the villains are kidnapping a child, the dumb one is wearing a zombie mask and the smart one is wearing a werewolf mask, because get it, the dumb one is the other villain's minion, and the smart one seemed good at first but he's really a monster in disguise do you get it

one of them saying he wanted to be a magician when he was a kid would have been clever foreshadowing if it was not similarly bashed over your head how clever the author found it lmao

the main character is equal parts kind of clever and very stupid, but her few smart moments rely entirely on the villains being too dumb to figure out that she would do something to try and fool them. yes even the smart one is too dumb to figure out when she is obviously playing them

on the positive side this book can be really funny and I feel like Adams actually has a decent sense of humor... the only problem is there are also moments that are funny in a way that feels very unintentional

somehow I am supposed to believe two other characters don't notice how evil the villains are or that they are unaware of things like three characters being absent all at once, multiple times. they are all stranded in a rest stop during a snowstorm btw

there are a couple moments where it feels like neither the author nor the editor read real closely because the protagonist has a thought and two seconds later (literally, a page-and-a-half later) the villain says the same thing and she acts like this is a huge revelation. gorl WHAT

in perhaps another sign of the book's "age" (it was published in 2017!) one of the bad guys is a porn addict and we are supposed to find this creepy... while I agree with this we have unfortunately entered an age where calling out a dude's porn addiction is seen as a hate crime lmao

I like the middle-aged side characters, they are charming in a typical "embarrassing middle aged people" kind of way. I could tell the book is written by a man when the (female) protagonist calls the older woman "frumpy" lmao

since I still have about 200 pages to go however (and I haven't looked at spoilers) I'm still holding out hope that a really dumb story one of the villains told very early in the book has some pay-off later. he got his thumb nearly amputated in a door hinge when he was a child so here's hoping some freak door hinge accident is what takes him out!!!

[solomonish]

Dork Solomon Agenda

You say sexy shady sorcerer I say nerd and love of my life

Solomon is a sad lonely little man why just wants a genuine connection us that so much to ask???

No but seriously like. It's totally fine if you hc Solomon as this man-turned-lowkey-sex-god with a million succubi and more at his whim whenever he wants and would be a tough one to put the ol' ball and chain on like to each their own for sure! But that's not MY hc

(Thats not to say my hc means he doesn't ever engage in casual sex like that and wanting a genuine long term relationship at some point [or finding out thats what you want when you meet someone] are not mutually exclusive yknow)

So like Solomon isn't the type to be short with you or keep you at an arm's length (i mean...u get what I mean. Once you're close enough and all that jazz) or get annoyed by you wanting to be affectionate?? Hello??

He LOVES the little things you do (some on accident tbh). You feeling affectionate today and give him a kiss or three on his face before you leave to go to your separate classes? Adorable, he's fallen in love again. You do that thing where you like.. forget how to walk straight and just accidentally bump into him? No come back he likes being close to you :( He doesn't SAY these things but there's a light, airy laugh he has that gives him away.

If you're ever facetiming he will say "boo!" when you connect instead of just. Greeting you like a normal person.

His fuckin. His devilgram name is monSOLO. My mans is a star wars fan!!! I dont know any of The Discourse bc I'm not super into star wars myself but he has IN DEPTH opinions about the movies. Seriously rivals Levi in this aspect. Please make time for movie nights where you watch the movies together 🥺 especially if you haven't seen them before he'd love to convert you 🥺

Didn't Solomon also have a thing for TSL??? Or am I just imagining it??

I feel like his ideal date would be exploring something new, whether its this new spooky forest or "hey have we been down this alley before? Let's check it out!" but ideal date number TWO is movie night. Even if it isn't Star Wars. He likes to sit on opposite ends of the couch throwing popcorn into each other's mouths (and big candies like peanut m&ms where you both have almost choked before) and maybe a footsie war if he's feeling real devious. Then at some point you grab a blanket and snuggle up to him and you both fall asleep on the couch

Simeon yells at him when you leave because there's popcorn EVERYWHERE

LOVES when you laugh super loud. Idk man he just thinks its great when you have such unbridled joy and then he laughs too 😊 not as loud though he's more of a quiet chuckle kind of guy (most of the time).

Is friends with Asmo so is extremely great at slumber party gossip. Catch him in his pajamas, cross-legged on the floor while clutching a pillow to his chest and listening intently to you rant about the brothers.

"Come here I have a secret to tell you" (blows air in your ear) "okay okay I'm sorry but come here again" (blows air on your neck) "okay okay last time! I actually have something to tell you. Please? Its important...." (kisses ur cheek) "like u a lil bit xo"

Never the type to send "good morning beautiful" or "good night 💞" texts. Instead he'll send you something at 4 am like "the infinite cosmos will eventually swallow whole all familiarity and life as it is now presently known and despite the adaptations humans or demons or angels could make i will still have to adapt and face the world as an alien in the realm I love so dearly. Funny how the strongest of beings bow to the whim of space and time. But sometimes my eternal journey doesn't seem so daunting when I realize that with my everlasting life will be the memory of you no matter how distant and the survival of the vessel you loved...."

And then at lunch that day when the brothers pull you away he'll send you a picture of the lasagna they're serving with "this kinda looks like you? Don't worry I'd still hit it" and then two minutes later "you not the pasta"

Is the type to think randomly "oh damn I love you so much" but has an impressive filter about it. Or he thinks he does until Luke grumbles "ugh get a room thats the fifth time you've seen that since monday" ok, sometimes he has a good filter about it

He can't help it! Sometimes you just say something really smart (or something SPECTACULARLY dumb) or you do something cute like lean on him or smile a specific way or-

Sir.....you're head over heels sir :/

The type who would go to a playground at night with you and just swing on the swings talking about life

Wants to have a secret handshake with you!!

If you're ever on a road trip with just the two of you, you can get him to join in on the terrible singing but he'll be a lot quieter than you

Also will only join in if he isn't driving. If he is and you aren't talking, he's just humming underneath his breath. Will drum on the steering wheel though

Cooking

(Yes, it gets its own section because MAYBE I'm obsessed with the idea of MC teaching Solomon to cook and the food still turning out terrible but at least it isn't a void when MC is helping)

The type to flick water at you every time he washes his hands. Will chase you down just to do it.

"Hey, tilt your head back and open your mouth MC" (proceeds to dump too big a handful of shredded cheese in your mouth)

100% the type to lean over you just to hinder your cooking abilities. Who cares if the sauce splashes he's tiiiired.... you'd let belphie do it :(

Puts a hand on your lower back when he passes behind you. Hopes you'll lean into it/step back and offer him a kiss 🥺

Believes in always having a proper table setting. Prepare for whatever juice they have (or water) in wine glasses if you're having a nice-er meal

Under the assumption that a spell ruined his sense of taste (and not that he's just bad at cooking) he hates spicy food. He can feel the burn but he gets none of the flavor??? Wack. Don't hurt him like that MC. If you do because its hilarious to watch him try to be cool about it he will pout

Gets cheesy aprons. He just likes them.

Will hit you on the top of your head with a whisk to hear the noise it makes

Will buy every kitchen hack tool there is. A ketchup dispenser that looks like a gun? He's got it. A fish that helps you squeeze out the egg yolks? Yes! A dinosaur soup ladle? You bet! Pizza scissors? A tool that makes hard boiled eggs into cubes? Something that's gotta be like 200 years old and no discernable purpose? Absolutely! He wants a hot dog toaster. Do they even have hot dogs in the devildom?

Will sneak bites just because it bothers you

Overall

Look at him. He hasn't had friends in centuries. He's playful!

Look at his DEVILGRAM NAME

His funky little WAND

This is a man who is a huge nerd, thrives off of cliches and just wants to have a good time. So let him! Its mentally exhausting having those pretenses up all the time.

[gay-snom]

contextualizing lwj’s coming to terms with his feelings subplot!

i wanna talk about the role of confucianism in this subplot because i think it’s something some western fans might not pick up on. basically, the sociopolitical climate of confucianism in his character arc, and a little bit about his interaction with the public image theme.

disclaimer: i’m not chinese but i do have a double minor in chinese and asian studies and have written a few papers on confucianism.

we’re gonna be talking about the novel bc i feel its a little more in-depth and nuanced than lwj’s “what is black, what is white” monologue in cql. namely the tension and misunderstanding in wwx’s first life and how lwj got his scars. i feel like it’s pretty well accepted that wwx made lwj reconsider his world view, so i’m just gonna expand on it. also i want to point out it's pretty unspoken in most of the text, but lwj is also affected by/used to explore the public image themes, as his image the is ideal confucian scholar.

confucianism is centered around the ideas of how to behave “good” in sociopolitical contexts. basically it boils down to a belief system on how society should be run. if everyone follows confucian beliefs, you will have an ideal society. the main text is the Analects, which you can read here. it’s been around for a few thousand years (like around 200 BCE ish), had a huge revival in the tang dynasty (618-907 CE). it was put on imperial exams, the emperor’s cabinet had confucian scholars, etc. this is just to say confucian values are important to historic society, especially upper-class scholars, which seems to be a role cultivators commonly fill in xianxia. here are some basic tenants:

being a gentleman/scholar/superior man (君子 jūn zǐ) : partly being learned in the arts, literature, music, poetry, etc., mostly behaving righteously and dutifully.

filial piety: usually described as obedience. it's not simply obeying everything elders tell you, it includes doing it with reverence and thankfulness for their sacrifices for you.

leading by example: if leaders/the government is righteous, the people will follow. lwj has his flock of juniors that are all strong cultivators and the lan sect is just generally known for being moral and good.

rites/rituals: a focus on politeness and holding proper ceremonies, sacrifices, and funerals

speech: there’s some great meta about the register he speaks in here, i just want to touch on think carefully before you speak, only speak sincerely, etc.

tldr; lwj is THE perfect gentleman (even his title contains the character suffix 君 -jūn, like lxc. which, while this character is not uncommon for cultivator titles, it wasn’t chosen carelessly either. also not to be confused with 尊 -zūn). seriously, look at almost all of book 10 and you'll see don't do/consume in excess, don't talk during meals, sit only when your mat is straight, etc.

okay, so Why is understanding his feelings for wwx so troublesome?

1.2 "They are few who, being filial and fraternal, are fond of offending against their superiors. There have been none, who, not liking to offend against their superiors, have been fond of stirring up confusion... Filial piety and fraternal submission! - are they not the root of all benevolent actions?"

in other words, people who are filial will never create political tension. so like, morally, wwx should be considered horrible person! he’s not only snubbed the jiang sect. he was a head disciple who undoubtedly had younger students looking up to him. and then he goes and stirs up some huge political issues! he is now a bad role model for the people below him and disrespected the people above him. lwj has an entire image to uphold, he has poured his entire life into following these rules and beliefs, and then wwx comes along. would continuing to be in wwx's life taint lwj? there are some contradicting teachings in regards to interacting with wwx:

15.4: "Do not take counsel with those who follow a different Way"

15.28: "When the multitude hates a person, you must examine them and judge for yourself. The same holds true for someone whom the multitude love."

15.36 "When it comes to being Good, defer to no one, not even your teacher."

this is part of the reason lwj had so much trouble accepting his feelings. he didn’t know how to handle this situation, making him appear distant during/directly after sunshot. if he judges wwx's intentions to be pure, it's then not wrong to be friendly with him. but wwx still is morally wrong by society's standards. now, lwj has to not only figure out his feelings, but also reconcile this with how he still thinks wwx is Not a bad person, despite everything. what if he does get "tainted" by wwx? will it hurt the reputation of his sect? that would be un-filial, right? he spent his whole life memorizing rules that are probably extremely similar to sections in the Analects, and now these mixed messages (coupled with the relatable gay panic) are overwhelming.

onto the next! there’s something unspoken in the scene where wwx discovers why lwj has the whip scars. as other posts have mentioned, lwj taking wwx back to the burial mounds and nursing him is high treason. however, this action is also extremely un-filial. also his entire image is built around being a perfect gentleman, if this were to get out to the public he would lose absolutely everything. he would be just as irreparable as wwx.

“I was worried if those from another sect found you first, WangJi would be considered your accomplice. The best scenario was his name being forever tainted, and the worst was his life being taken away right then. Thus, along with Uncle, we chose thirty three seniors who had always thought highly of WangJi... ”

there’s no way lwj didn’t know what would happen if he did this. obviously as lxc says, if this got out, he would lose basically his entire face. and even though lxc didn’t mention this, it would definitely lose a lot of face for the lan sect as well since lwj is so prominent. the decision about what elders to bring is also notable.

“...As if he knew all along he would be discovered by us, he said that there was nothing to explain, that this was it. Growing up, he had never talked back to Uncle, not even once. But for you, not only did WangJi talk back to him, he even met with his sword the cultivators from the Gusu Lan sect...”

so yeah, he obviously knew they would come for him and what the consequences would be. and he still talked back! that’s already not a good look for the lan sect. but attacking them? totally unforgivable! lwj gives up how he was raised and the importance of filial piety, what he has held on to until this major plot event. since it's basically the biggest "fuck you" to his uncle and his clan, this was not a decision he made lightly. lwj shows them he cares more about wwx and His Own ideas of right and wrong than the sect’s or society’s.

Wei WuXian dug his hands into his hair, “...I-I didn’t know... I really...”

when was the last time wwx was at a loss for words? wwx spends a few paragraphs after this lamenting how he hurt lwj, but he's not unaware of the gravity of what lwj did. it's an underlying assumption from being raised in the culture. i would argue his first instinct is "oh god he gave up what for me?" since those lamenting paragraphs are after lxc finishes speaking.

"But he said... that he could not say with certainty whether what you did was right or wrong..."

this is something thrown around a lot in the Analects, that not even confucius can say for sure what is right or wrong. what better way to show lwj is still a perfect confucian than have him paraphrase confucius himself?

“...WangJi was a model for the disciples when he was young, and a prominent cultivator when he grew up. In his whole life he had been honest and righteous and immaculate--you were the only mistake he made!”

here’s the confirmation that the world and even his family thinks of him as a perfect gentleman, the top tier of society, and it was all thrown away for wwx. this is just so heavy. the mistake thing? thats not only because lwj is fraternizing with an enemy. lxc and the rest of the sect who knew are terrified this will forever corrupt lwj personally, not just publicly. lwj was so devoted to believing this was the right thing to do he offered up everything he had. the gravity of this decision is insane. it’s very obvious that he loves wwx, it’s just that he struggles a lot internally to accept everything that is happening.

as for helping wwx leave after the massacre, is this gentleman-ly of lwj? was it actually in-line with his image? is it more honorable to save someone who is dying, at the cost of your own health, than to look away? isn't looking away a form of resentment? i wasn't able to find a specific passage about bystander-ness, but personally i think it qualifies as "bad intentions." there is also this passage for what it's worth, originally it was about government suppression:

12.19: "...What do you say to killing the unprincipled for the good of the principled?" Confucius replied, "...why should you use killing at all?..."

lwj is always more actions than words, and he was not fucking around. his core beliefs really haven't changed, and remain very strong throughout his life. he is still righteous enough to accept his punishment, graceful enough to search for wwx's body since there was no one else to do the funeral rites (10.22/10.15), caring enough to take in a-yuan, upright enough to still spend his years going where the chaos is.

just with this one action, the audience knows he has come to terms with realizing that authority isn't always just, and neither is the public opinion/opinion of other gentlemen. he has reconciled. this is him standing for what he believes is right. this is his devotion. this is his own choice. just. poetic cinema...

anyway that's it for my first meta post! i would love to hear your thoughts, feelings, opinions, discussions, other meta ideas, whatever! thank u for reading! <3

[karasunology]

⸙ ˚₊ ➷ NEKOMA WITH A SHY! ANXIOUS AND ASTHMATIC MANAGER ! ❞

✎ . . . hello since your requests are open may i request vbc teams (karasuno, nekoma and shiratorizawa) + shy manager with anxiety and asthma? i rlly am hungry for some team dynamics and your work is amazing so if you may? YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO IT IF YOU DON'T WANT TO DO IT THOUGH!

❝ ― submitted by @ nonnie <3 ❞

-ˏˋ ➶ character(s) ━ nekoma vbc <3

[ trigger warnings ━ none ]

✎ . . . TEAM MANAGER HEADCANONS.

[ other parts coming soon . . . ]

NEKOMA VBC.

➜ after finding out about karasuno having TWO managers now,

➜ like they  m u l t i p l i e d ✖➗➕➖

➜ and with taketora's failure of recruiting one,

➜ kuroo was PRACTICALLY BEGGING YOU to be their manager

➜ his reasons being and i quote; “ giving more motivation to the team ” and of course “ to show those bastards the sanctity of nekoma ”

➜ and rooster boi was a determined person, once he sets his mind to something ─ he will do everything to attain it

➜ you knew kuroo ever since you first started first year with him, the both of you quietly competing against each other on your collage preparatory class but soon grew closer to be called friends

➜ but he'd always call you his rival even though it was lowkey one-sided

➜ and after hearing that the club you joined in this year, just for the sake of joining; disbanded, and kuroo was UNASHAMED to ask of you to be the manager of their team

➜ it's been two ever since nekoma had a manager and he was TIRED™ of not having one and it was already his last year playing

➜ you having no other reasons to object, you agreed, but not without asking in a small voice to help you introduce yourself to the team

➜ you were shy to new people ─ hell, even after knowing him for three years you would still get shy around him

➜ and because of that, kuroo was already one step ahead of everything;

➜ talking to the reliable third years ─ kai and yaku, about looking out for you explaining your slight anxiety and asthma problems

➜ homeboy would have a team meeting just to discuss and announce about a new female manager

➜ YAMAMOTO DEAD ASS DROPPED ON HIS KNEES WITH TEARS ON HIS EYES AND PRAISED WHOEVER GAVE HIM THIS OPPORTUNITY

➜ the third years weren't shocked, since kuroo already had a word with them seperately

➜ LEV, BABY BOY WAS ECSTATIC, HE WAS ALWAYS IN FOR THE IDEA OF MEETING SOMEONE NEW

➜ kuroo knew that lev would be ALL UP ON HER FACE if he doesn't do anythibg about it, so he threatened on benching him if he ever does something to scare away this ONE CHANCE of having a real girl manager

➜ fukunaga was curious to say the least, he wondered how it would be like to have a girl manager helping them around since it's always him and yaku

➜ inuoka, being the bubbly boy he is, was excited to have a female manager, since it is his first year in the vbc

➜ kenma was just straight up vibin, he already knew alot about everything he needed to know about you because of kuroo

➜ but still listened as he played with his psp

➜ shibayama and tamahiko were neutral about it honestly, satisfied because their team needed a bit more motivation if they wanted to win nationals

➜ kuroo just wanted to make you feel comfortable and safe with the team

➜ genuinely, the team didn't know how it would honestly flow with actually meeting their manager

➜ scared of scaring her off, they remained uncharacteristically toned down abit right before they meet you

➜ kuroo opened the metal doors to the volleyball gym, while peaking your pretty little head out to see where the members where; you were shocked to see them straightening their backs the second they saw your head peaking out from behind kuroo

➜ it was . . silent, and it was weird since, you've once secretly dropped by on their practices and they were evidently chaotic just by the sounds of their voices which echoed around the gym

➜ your palpitations slowed down a bit as you fully showed yourself to the members before flusteredly bowing at them

“ I HOPE WE CAN GET ALONG ”

➜ it was quiet for a second, before you hear sobbing as you lifted your head up to see yamamoto trying not to cry

“ this, this is my first time having a female manager . . . ” with snot drooling from his nose

➜ being the worried sweet senpai manager you are, you hurriedly took out your unused napkin from your pocket which you packed for the sole purpose of avoiding smoke; offering the napkin to him as it only made him burst into TEARS streaming down his face

➜ like that scene where the third years and second years bursted in tears when kiyoko put up their banner?

➜ yeah that

➜ but it's just taketora LMAOO

➜ before their captain could tell him off, a small laugh came out of you and kuroo just looked at you like

➜ 👁👁

➜ kuroo : ma'AM DID YOU JUST ─

➜ cue kuroo also dying inside because YOU. RARELY. LAUGH.

➜ since you're more on the reserved side

➜ kai and yaku almost had to put their foot down because now you have broken their captain until you spoke out

“ i was honestly anxious when you guys were quiet, since i've never seen you guys as serious whenever i try and drop by to look. ”

➜ in the end of the meeting you've got acquaintaned yourself with shibayama and inouka, though the former seemed a bit flustered.

➜ you've also hold a small conversation with kenma, the both of you kinda clicked right away since both of you were a bit shy aswell. while you listened to lev rambling excitedly, not noticing your slight trembling figure

➜ bECAUSE MANS WAS A WHOLE ASS ONE FOOT TALLER THAN YOU

➜ after meeting them, the team had already attached themselves in your heart

➜ baby girl you are ATTACHED

➜ though it was subtle but you've noticed how the boys really cared about you ─ bruh even coach nekomata since he has noticed that you are a great asset to the team

➜ if not yaku, kai would always remind you of taking your meds for your asthma if you ever have been prescribed one

➜ kenma would always be the first one to notice if you were ever tensed up or your anxiety was acting up

➜ since he's very perceptive and observant

➜ he'd grow a soft spot for you and if he ever sees you stressed, he'd let you borrow his psp

➜ shibayama, inouka, fukunaga and tamahiko would ALWAYS help you carry stuff around because they don't want your asthma to act up or else tHEY WILL ACT UP

➜ fukunaga would always tell you his jokes since now he finally has someone to tell them to whenever he's in the sidelines watching the others play

➜ yamamoto would PROTECT you from any dangers, like literally, mans knew he was done for the day you gave him your napkin 👁👄👁

➜ you're literally one of the first girls he isn't shy to talk to and one of the first girls to not scurry away whenever he's near

➜ as i said, yaku would BE YOUR MOTHER, he'd one step ahead with having extra masks for you on his bag and an extra inhaler he borrowed from you in case you have forgotten yours

➜ LEV, KUROO & YAMAMOTO ARE YOUR BODY GUARDS AND THAT'S ON PERIODT😡💅

➜ period. periodt. periodism. periodic table.

➜ would not let any guy from other teams come your way and bother you while being the good manager you are

➜ and while doing so, shows you off as they are basically saying “ this is the sanctity of nekoma, you bastards wish you were us. ”

➜ these boys CARE FOR YOU like alot and they love it when you reciprocate their love

➜ whenever you surprise them every other day with their favourite snacks despite always being anxious of looking at the eyes of the guy on cash register,

➜ always having their towels and waterbottles ready for them to use after practice

➜ giving them clarity of mind before a match and whenever the non-regulars start to feel insecure

➜ overall, they'd be the sweetest boys of yours that would give and likely to give you the world to you as you would to them😡💝

-ˏˋ playing soleil's tape ˊˎ-

[ 📼 ] . . . i'm crying bubs, y'all had me at 200 last night ?? um okay i didn't even know people like me enought to even follow me 🥺 y'all cute or whateva😳✋ i'm not even DONE WITH MY LOVE LANGUAGE HEADCANONS FOR 100 FOLLOWERS HSJSJDJ but here's a manger headcanons mini series one of my nonnie's requested for to celebrate 200 of you guys !! <33

[ 📼 ] . . . I also know a bit of about asthma because i also had experience with it when i was young, and my little brother still has them while i've already grown out of it.

[snapewrld]

marauders fans straight up say Snape being a strict/snarky teacher is bullying, but what james did wasnt? just, tell me youve never been bullied without actually telling me. And tbh i think Snape being considered horribly strict is a western thing, hes way tamer then most teachers i had. They also downplay the class difference between them, like they clearly target snape over other slytherins (rich, purebloods who they have more in common with) because hes noticeably poor and a easy target.

*beep* *beep* no lies detected Anon

Disclaimer: I've never been bullied bullied but there was a few unpleasant interactions in the short timespan of one year but I wouldn't necessarily call it bullying so if I mess up I'm not speaking from experience only empathy.

Severus Snape didn't bully children, but he was a Jackass with a chip on his shoulder. A whole douchebag.

But he still wasn't a bully nor was he an abuser.

I also most definitely, 200%, hands down find the "Snape was a Bully" and "Snape was an Incel" culture to be from my fellow americans... They can be so opinionated and "Hardcore Ally" (u know the ones)

And yes. They downplay a lot of what other characters do and demonize Snape for the stuff he does (Tbh that man acted like the spawn of Satan at times) and likes to take away from his character arc.

James and the Marauders were bullies, no debate. They picked on someone in their class because of their unfriendly disposition, social and economic class, closeness with lily, and ofc bc of the way that he looked. Typical jackass behavior.

Snape was an easy target. His bloodtype alone most definitely made him an outcast not to mention that he isn't conventionally attractive and he has a temper.

I don't think the slytherins ever tried to reach out to him, he wasn't one of them anyways so why should they help him?

I don't know if the marauders were super smart or super cowardly. Perhaps a bit of both.

I mean... Why would they go after the Pureblood slytherins? They share the same privilege. You don't go after one of yours, no matter how bad they are.

"Toujours Pur" aka "Blood Is Thicker than Water"

And Severus' blood is watered down with Muggle blood.

I think everyone had their prejudices.

The Marauders still actively practiced blood purity and supremacy just in a smaller variety.

[drprettyboyspence]

Promposal

Dr. Spencer Reid/reader

Summary: One day Derek teases Spencer about never going to prom in high school and fellow team member, Y/n, decides to plan a surprise to make up for the experience he never had. 

words: 1.1k 

warnings: none to my knowledge, super fluffy!!

a/n: I wanna write a part 2 to this of the actual prom because this is just the promposal! I hope you guys enjoy! Also thank you for 200 followers!!! :) 

“Hold on Prentiss, let me get this straight, you never went to prom?” Derek Morgan’s too-loud for nine a.m. voice echoes throughout the bullpen one Tuesday morning. 

“Well duh Derek, prom doesn’t really exist in Europe, it’s a pretty American tradition.” Emily responds matter-of-factly, barely looking up from the endless stack of paperwork from their most recent case. 

“What’s the big deal with prom anyway? I didn’t go either.” Spencer adds, spinning around in his wheely-chair from where his desk is across the room. 

“Oh what a surprise! The kid genius didn’t go to prom? I’m shocked!” Derek says in a mocking tone, causing Spencer’s face to fall almost unnoticeably, well, unnoticeably if you’re not Y/n Y/l/n. 

“Oh leave him alone Morgan, I’m sure you had a great prom experience at 18, when Spencer had already gotten a doctorate.” Y/n jumps into the conversation to Spencer’s defense, causing the other members of the team to laugh, Emily asking Derek if he needs some ice for that burn. 

“Not that it’s any of your business Y/n, I did have a great time at prom. Me and my girlfriend at the time, we-”

“Round table room, new case you guys!” JJ yells from above the bullpen, thankfully interrupting Derek from telling another of his too much information stories. They all walk up the stairs but Y/n lingers back for a moment, her mind unable to forget the slight flicker of emotion that had crossed Spencer’s face when Derek had mentioned him never getting to experience prom. If Y/n’s being completely honest, she’s had a bit of a crush on the young Dr. since she had joined the team almost a year ago now and she’s not completely sure, but she thinks she’s noticed a few extra glances and blushes from him whenever she’s around. An idea starts to form in her head, but she’s going to need help, so this will have to wait until after whatever new gruesome case JJ has found for them.

1 week later 

Y/n walks into the BAU the morning after the team gets back from Boston and she looks over to see Spencer doing a crossword inhumanely fast at his desk. He turns and waves at her to say good morning and she smiles back at him, all of a sudden remembering her idea from the previous week. Y/n takes her phone out when she gets to her desk and pulls up texts with Garcia. 

Garcia, wanna help me surprise Spencer with something? I have a cute idea! Text me back asap! Y/n barely puts her phone on the desk when it’s buzzing with text messages from the extremely tech-savvy analyst who comes running at even the merest mention of a cute surprise. 

“So let me get this straight? You want to take Spencer to prom because he never experienced it when he was younger? That’s so sweet of you Y/n! Where do you want to have the prom? Can we do it at my house! I want to decorate!!” 

“Of course we can have it at your house! We should get the whole team to come to prom! This is going to be so fun!” Y/n starts getting more and more excited about her idea, trying to push down the nerves that maybe Spencer won’t be into this idea at all, won’t be into her at all. They decide to have the prom on Friday, it being Tuesday and them having an extremely unpredictable job, it’s probably better they plan it quickly before a new case can come up and ruin everything. Y/n then begins planning one of the more important parts of prom, the promposal. Classically in the past the man is the one proposing but with a big f u to patriarchy, Y/n is going to plan the best promposal ever for Spencer! Throughout the week Y/n and Garcia tell the rest of the team members and they all seem excited for the BAU prom, even Hotch, who laughs at the idea but agrees to join in on the fun. They decorate Garcia’s apartment with lights and streamers to transform the quirky space into a high school auditorium perfect for prom. On Friday morning Y/n wakes up shockingly nervous, she sees her “prom” dress hanging in the corner and lets her insecurities take over for just a moment. What if Spencer doesn’t like her after all? What if he thinks this entire idea is stupid? What if he doesn’t like her dress? She shakes her head and gets out of bed, this day is going to be perfect. It’s a normal day at work, except for the winks the other members of the BAU team stealthily give to Y/n throughout the day, and before she knows it it’s time for the big surprise. The team leaves earlier than usual to allow for Y/n to be alone with Spencer. 

“Hey Spencer, can you help me with something before we leave.” Y/n says from behind the doorway, wearing her dress and holding the sign that she had designed with Garcia. 

“Sure thing Y/n! What do you need?” Spencer says sweetly, always willing to help her. Y/n takes a deep breath and steps out from behind the door, Spencer’s mouth automatically falling open in immediate confusion then realization. 

“So, um, Spence, Derek was teasing you last week about never going to prom and it made me feel a little sad so I was um wondering, will you go to prom with me Dr. Spencer Reid?” Y/n knows she’s blushing and silence that fills the room after she asks the question seems to last forever. 

“Y/n, this is- I don’t even have the words to express, this is so sweet of you! I don’t think I have an appropriate outfit though.” He says and Garcia walks out from behind the doorway, holding a suit that matches Y/n’s dress perfectly, smiling giddily at the shocked look that shows on Spencer’s face. 

“I thought of that already Spencer, it’s all taken care of, we’re going to go to Garcia’s apartment and have prom with the rest of the team, that is, if you want to? 

“Of course I want to Y/n, thank you so much! This is so unbelievably sweet!” Spencer envelopes Y/n in one of his signature hugs at this moment, his arms tight around her as he whispers thank you into her ear one more time. Y/n might be wrong, but this kind of seems like the start of something magical. 

[teacup-baphomet]

G/t Drabble (Crash landed on a hostile planet trope but NOT via the a tiny vulnerable human in a planet of mean powerful alien bigs route)

tw: a bit of censored cursing. Uh. I’m not sure what else. Maybe broaching of sensitive tops such as sexuality and religion. But not really. Mostly it’s just rlly dumb word play/lame humor and a confused alien being confused (and kinda freaked/troubled due to the confusion? you’ll see if you read it i guess). there is some sad lorg boi times. idk. no romantic relationships. just a shaky friendship is forming between a crash-landed big-arse alien (a human! *gasp*  i woulda never guessed something as vile as that o: ) and one of the much smaller, very much not human locals. most want to kill the poor dude who got stuck on this planet of hostile lil guys who think he’s a monster and immediately decide they much off him asap. so like having this one ally is kinda important to him. But it’s hard. because. lots reasons rlly. culture differences. the language tech can only do so much. the size diff creates definite issues because trust is hard in general. and trusting a big being that could easily cause havoc on your planet mostly just cuz he /seems/ nice is not a very good foundation... there is much to learn between the two before they can be truly good frens. so uh good luck to them lol *raises glass* I mean. I don’t think I’ll ever write these two again. but I’m sure they’ll end up good friends. probably.

Anyway without further adieu, here have a disappointment (read: attempt to be creative but i’m kinda lazy tbh and still kinda bitter I can’t draw for more than like 10 minutes before I start spacing out :/ )

"We are called humans or the scientific name is homo sapiens" spoke the large alien, Lyle.

"Homo sapiens? That is rather long, is it not? Why is a "scientific name" even a thing? Why would that be necessary? Scientific name versus what kinda name? Emotional name? Why are these science names two words? Seems annoying. What is wrong with just calling yourselves simply homos? Or something else just as nice and concise. Straight to the point if you will. Probably. I... Uh.. I obviously don't know what exactly is the purpose of a scientific name as i already implied... Sooo..." The much shorter – and much scalier- native being (called Torrynts) awkwardly looked off the side to stare at the plain, blank, siding of their dilapidated, isolated house as if it were the most interesting thing in the entire vicinity. Which it wasn’t of course. There was a f***ing alien 15 times their size only a few them-sized lengths way…

 Lyle gave his new comrade – and only friend on this gawdforsaken planet that mostly wants him dead- th pondering, and possibly ironically, rather colourfully scaled Torrynt by the name of Kyvlar a bemused look, bordering on coy.

"Huh. 'Straight' to the point you say?" He paused with a small snort. "Well, my not-so-statuesque friend, do I got news for you~"

Kyvlar suddenly blanched, giving a Lyle a look that was like a knife to the heart while blurting out. "Wait, wait, wait! Hold up! We? There are more than one of you? Here? On this planet? Were you just a distraction the whole time. Oh... Oh no.... Have we really been victim a secret homo invasion this whole time! I-"

 Their panicked monologue was interrupted by a most horrendous noise. Like a slowly dying tornado with the hiccups or something.

"STOP. Stop I-I can't. I can't. This is too much much!" Spoke Lyle with his hand covering the bottom half of his  and his eyes scrunched shut.

 'Welp,' thought the Torrynt, 'This is the end. This is when I die. I should have known better than to immediately put my trust in such an enormous obviously dangerous specimen. Ho-'

 Kyvlar’s dramatic internal speech was interrupted when the alien surprised them by uncovering the his face, revealing a huge grin. ‘They weren't upset? Huh?’ The Torrynt blinked owlishly at the human in confusion.

 "Sh*t, bite-size (Kyvlar noticeably paled at the impromptu nickname not 100% the foreign joking tone, well it would have been noticeable to someone their size at least), I know you don't mean to, context-wise, but you reminded me of my great aunt Karen when my Uncle Todd and Uncle Copper decide to have their friends over along with relatives for a gatherin'."

Plastering on a faux distraught look and blatantly mocking tone, he  continue with exaggerated hand gestures. "Oh no, it's the...the...," he paused with snort, "... the homo invasion... No, no, no... Not here... not in this... this good, Christian neighborhood. Aren't just two of them enough? Oh woe is me!" The alien dropped the mocking tone and smirked towards the smaller being. "Heh. Good ol' great aunt Karen could never remember Uncle Todd was Jewish and so was the majority of that neighborhood.... It’s where my Uncle Todd was raised actually…"

 The said smaller being just stared blankly at the homo-no-human they supposed as just “homo” meant something else, they weren’t sure what else, beyond just something else.

 "Uhhm. Wh-what? U-Uhm, so what exactly is “homo” then? And what’s Christian? And Jewish too. What’s that? Are... Are those other types of -uh- intelligent, sentient creatures on your planet? Y-you know, b-beside hom-er-h-humans? Or are these subtypes of humans? What kinda are you? What is a great aunt? or Uncle? Does the great indicate a larger size? Oh gawd, a-aren't you humans b-big enough regularly? Oh... W-wait. O-or are you a great- uhm- great aunt, was it? E-er, g-great something? Ohhh. Zyntall (Torrynt swear). I'm sooo confused r-right now... " The timid tiny being, sighed in frustration before their eyes snapped open wide in a panic, and they did an immediate one-eighty with their behavior, and it was off all their previously trust, as wavering as it was, vanished in an instant, squeaking out a quick "sorry. oh, Z-zyntall... I'm so-so-sooo sorry. I-I hope I d-didn't offend y-you or anyth-thing... p-please, oh please, don't hurt me" while gazing everywhere except towards the much larger alien, hoping desperately the 'bite-size' nickname was just a bad joke...

 Clearly they not only didn't get what so hilarious about the whole thing but also thought he was a monster prone to violence – still. Lyle sighed, all the mirth that was previously in his expression draining out of him leaving him with an uncomfortable grimace on their face. How disappointing... They really wish there was another human here to share in the jesting. But alas, that was not meant to be. At least as far as they knew there was no "homo invasion" in the making. Lyle wasn’t naïve. He knew humans were easy to slip into a gray moral state, at best. The role of villains at worst. And many of his kind would likely take advantage of a planet full of tiny, vulnerable people. Lyle couldn’t help but inwardly cringe at the thought, getting nervous about something that wasn’t an issue. At least now. Currently, human-wise, it was just him on this distant planet. And as far as he knew, no one - well, no other human at least- had any clue where they were. It probably just seemed he simply disappeared. Never to be seen again most likely. Trapped on this random alien planet in scenario that is akin to some sort of a personal hell of sorts.

'Wow. Hello, major depressive episode that’s making me overly dramatic. I haven't seen you since I was - what - eighteen?' thought Lyle regretfully. Calling this planet a personal hell was probably a bit over the top. But still, he couldn’t even seem to keep the trust of his single native ally. It only adds to his feelings of lonely isolation. And he feared his lonely angst will only get worse and worse. But only time will tell.

Giving a small sigh, he mentally prepped himself to try and get back his small friend’s trust. At least he was able to laugh for a wee bit earlier. It had been so long since he had done such. It was nice. Hopefully next time it will not lead to a backtracking in his attempted friendly ships with an open local, or even worse, a hostile local. The little laser guns that native being had stung like a b*tch. It reminded him when he got bit a couple times by some fire ants during a vacation as a child.

-----------

So yeah these were rando improvised characters made on the spot.

But Lyle is a guy (he/him. He’d be chill with they/them too)

And Kyvlar is… a Torrynt. So like they/them I guess. Torrynts don’t have genders. Like at all. I guess they hermaphroditic (intersex if talking by human terms but not really as they are capable of reproduction and they aren’t human so… I dunno… Not even sure if hermaphrodite is a useful term. As idk if hermaphroditic animals, in nature, are capable of reproduction… I don’t think so? But I’m not sure tbh…). There is no variants like there are with human “sex”. And male/female concepts are 200+% foreign to these wee reptile-like aliens (albeit warm-blooded minded, so perhaps more draconian than reptilian idk. Also aliens being described as reptilian gives me hives due to a conspiracy theory that is like super bigoted actually n’ stuff. Very yikes. Don’t want to talk it about it rlly…). Their reaction would def be “wtf. That’s the weirdest sh*t ever” to such a thought as male n female binary dynamics & whatnot. No exceptions. They’d be like why a lot of you guys limiting yourself because of whether or not you are a potential offspring vessel or not. I don’t understand.

So Yeah. Uh. Anyways.

Their conversation about this prolly (or close to this):

Lyle: Hi. I’m Lyle. Just some random dude form Earth I guess.

Kyvlar: a random dude what?

Lyle: uh. I’m a dude. I guess I meant that I’m a boy though dudes don’t really have to be boys I think. But not to derail too much… Yeah. I’m a man/guy/boy/brosef, whatever you wanna call the male gender. Please not by brosef actually, heh. Anyway. Yep. A boy. That is what I am. Uh. How about you. I can just tell… you ….you have uhm two legs. Oh damn. Wait. That sounded so stupid. I wouldn’t assume your gender or anything. I just… You don’t look exactly human so..uh. UGH. Nevermind. I don’t even know where I was going with that... Heh. ANYWAY, so yeah what’s your gender is what I’m trying to say. Sorry I’m awkward as f***. I’m not used to socializing much. Been doing deep space sh** on my own for a few years now and.. uh.. yeahhhh….

Kyvlar: *stares blankly*

Lyle: Uh. Yeah. So. A Gender? Do you, uhm, have one? Or…????

Kyvlar: Uh. I think so? I mean I’m mostly a day-by-day I’ll figure it out then type but I, I really want be able to fix my home up. I want to learn to cook. Kinda suck at it now. Uhm. I guess… Uh. I should probably help you get on good terms with my people so they stop trying to kill you. You seem nice n’ stuff… so yeah. There’s that. I could use a little more purpose in my life. Not to-

Lyle: wait. Huh? What are you talking about? Are you talking about an agenda?

Kyvlar: Yes????

Lyle: *snorts* I didn’t say an agenda. I said a gender. As in A. Gen. Durr. Like are male or female or maybe something off the typical binary track??

Kyvlar: Uh. Er. Huh??? I, I’m so confused right now…

Lyle: Hooo boy. I’m so not prepared for this discussion at all.

-----------

One of these days I’m gonna have a character that’s silver-tongue and smooth af and not some bumbling awkward doofus (*cough* like I am *cough*).

[taetaesbaebaepsae]

BTS During Sex

Maknae Line

Summary: Title speaks for itself, really, just filth

Warnings: Smut, filth, only sinners welcome, look there’s probably kink warnings but idk if you’re reading this you know what’s up, anyway I’m thirsty

Request:

anonymous asked:

BTS during sex? kind of like how you did the break-up one 👀 if thats too much then just for jeon jungkook

A/N: I am doing a Jungkook one tho theoreticalthot01

Word Count: 2579

Taehyung (V)

The most contradictory of all the boys sexually

Wait I’ll explain in a minute

He’s traditional

Most likely if y’all are fucking you’re in a long term relationship

He’d really be real bad at casual sex and not catching feelings (See my FWB reaction)

So if he’s fucking you, he’s probably in love with you

This means slow strokes, looking into your eyes, PRAISE so much praise Tae is your personal hype man

Loves missionary because he wants to look at your face and kiss you

Tae would make out with you and nothing else for 4 hours if you’d let him

Best kisser

When I say he’s vanilla I don’t mean he’s boring, just stay with me

He’s s o f t

Deadass will not let you give him head unless you just really really want to because he feels so guilty when you gag or if you look uncomfortable he can’t come

Will eat you out all the time and if you look tired he won’t even try to fuck you after just straight make your legs shake and go watch Netflix with you with pussy juice all over his mouth

Actually he loves the taste he’d fucking put it in a cup and drink it if it were possible

Definitely the best at going down on you of all the boys because he loves it so much

Tae’s dick is either totally average or fucking HUGE, idk the world may never know

Sex is sweet and you’ll never doubt how much he loves you

But lowkey after a while you might doubt how much he wants you

Very controlled (I can hear you thirsty hoes complaining just WAIT)

But at some point in a relationship, you will do something that will make him snap

Tae is extremely visually stimulated

So for his birthday you buy some sexy lingerie and as an afterthought, throw in some Gucci logo sheer tights

You set everything up it’s all romantic and shit, rose petals on the bed, candles lit, and you in a crotchless teddy, the tights, and 4 inch stilettos

You’ve curled your hair, full face makeup, the whole works

The icing on the cake is that you wrap a purple ribbon around your waist and tie it as if you are his birthday gift

So you lie on the bed and wait for him but he’s late getting home and you fall asleep

You wake up to his strangled moan and he’s standing over you, shirt unbuttoned, cock out, stroking himself

You’re shook because he’s so hesitant when asking you for sex usually, making sure you’re down

Shook but also, instantly wet, because goddamn, what a sight

When your eyes pop open he’s crawling across the bed toward you like a panther

You expect him to say he’s sorry he woke you but he doesn’t say shit

He just grasps the ribbon where it’s tied around your waist and looks up at you as if asking if he can open his present

“Anything you want, baby,” you whisper, voice kinda hoarse from sleep and now, thirst

“Anything?” He kinda growls and you’re like YES SIR

So like sex with Tae has always been great, he’s a giver like Hobi and he always makes you come but like this? Fucking god tier

He usually takes his time with foreplay, works you up for an hour, but now he’s uncharacteristically impatient, just slides his fingers into you and when they come out wet he huffs and grabs your ankles, yanking your ass to the edge of the bed

He. Is so. LOUD

He fucks you so hard you feel like your hips might break, slamming into you and groaning, cursing, which he doesn’t normally

He’s still praising you, though, “You’re so fucking perfect; I love you so much”

He looks like a fucking god, bronze skin, sheen of sweat, head arched back, baring his teeth as he gets closer to coming

You tell him you want him to come inside as you’ve gotten on birth control just for this particular occasion and he groans so loud your ears hurt

HEREIN YOU DISCOVER TAE’S HIDDEN KINK

He has no idea you’re on birth control but he doesn’t give a single fuck

Highkey has an impregnation kink and you’d think it was weird but really it’s just hot and kinda sweet

He’s talking so dirty you’re blushing even as he fucks you mercilessly

“Oh my God, I’m gonna fill you up until your tight cunt is dripping with my come; gonna get you all nice and round and full of our baby because I love you so much.”

He growls and grunts so loud when he comes you feel like someone is gonna call the police

ANYWAY so Kim Taehyung has an breeding kink and that’s that on that

You can never go off birth control and he’s lowkey disappointed when he realizes you are on it

Sex is still sweet sometimes but you know how to get him going, just have to wear something sexy and beg him to come inside you and it’s ON

When he loses control, it’s a sight to behold

He definitely loves to eat his come out of your pussy it’ll make him hard all over again

Is the sweetest baby with aftercare though like he’ll leave bruises on your hips and ass and kiss them all one by one

Kinda proud when he leaves a big mark somewhere visible, though, he’s lowkey possessive

God help you if you do get pregnant, he’ll want to fuck all day every day the entire pregnancy

He says shit like “I wanna get you pregnant every 9 months for the rest of your life because you look so fucking gorgeous this way” 

If you don’t want children really you’re shit outta luck no way he’d be with anyone who didn’t at least eventually want them

And he’s not good at one night stands because he isn’t comfortable enough to let loose so I mean look if you wanna fuck Taehyung be prepared to marry him and have his babies I don’t know what to tell you he’s just like this

So anyway outside of the breeding kink he’s kind of an exhibitionist

would 100% be down to make a homemade porno with you and would watch it instead of porn while he’s on tour

Has like 200 nudes of you in various positions

Who needs porn when he has you? His attraction is 95% emotional, anyway so the more in love he is the more action you’ll get

Jimin

Ok so hot take but Jimin is lowkey a sub

I mean he’s a switch but he leans sub

Very high sex drive will be down anytime, anywhere

You can make him hard with a wink and a smile 

No one has ever, in life, had as big a praise kink as Park Jimin

You’ll find that out real quick

If during sex, you say something like “you’re fucking me so good,” or “God, you’re so good, Jimin” he will come like a firehose like, immediately

In the top three best of the group at eating you out

He lives to please, honestly, so it’s one of his favorite things

He’s so proud when he makes you come hard

If you’re a squirter he might wife you

Is a little shit, will tease you for hours and loves it when you do the same

He is not too proud to beg he will love it when you tease him

Will praise you just as much as you praise him, telling you how hard you make him and how much he loves your cunt

If you want him to be a sub, he can do that, but he’ll be bratty as fuck and he would definitely never like a degradation kink or anything he’s not built to handle that kind of thing

He could take or leave head but if you go down on him just know he’s stupid loud so you won’t want to do it anywhere someone can hear you

Will always come in your mouth, doesn’t want it too messy unless it’s you coming and then he lives for you being a mess

He wants you shaking and begging him to let you breathe

O v e r s t i m u l a t i o n

Like, every time, and he likes it when you do it to him, too, that’s the only time he really truly loves a blowjob is when you suck the soul out of him

Ok so I know I said he’s sub leaning and he is

But if you make him jealous he will wreck you

And if you stand near a houseplant and not him long enough he’ll get salty so I mean it might happen a lot

He just wants all the attention, he needs all eyes on him, especially if he loves you

So if you laugh too hard at a joke someone makes or have an impromptu lunch date with a friend and he feels left out you are in trouble

He’ll be rough, pulling your hair and leaving all kinds of  marks all over your neck, he’ll bite you 

So like if you want Jimin to fuck you into next week just lowkey flirt with the waiter at dinner and you got it

THE KING OF SKYPE SEX

A whole exhibitionist

It’s so hot watching him jerk off, honestly, it makes you so wet

He could be a camboy star, for real

Gets off on knowing how much he affects you

Loves to send you thotty pictures but not too many dick pics, just like sexy selfies and shit

Asks for nudes every single day he’s on tour

He deadass will make a pic of you spreadeagled his lockscreen

If you agree to make a homemade video with him he will be SO happy and watch it all the damn time

If he wasn’t famous he’d post that shit on Redtube just for the comments

Would never under any circumstances do a threesome with a man or a woman he’d lose his whole mind if you even suggested it

Just tell him he’s a good boy he’ll be yours forever

Jungkook

So he’s not real experienced but eager to learn

He’s like Hobi he’ll try most things at least once

No one has ever loved blowjobs as much as Jungkook don’t @me

Will fall in love if you can deepthroat

Will always reciprocate, though, and will like it when you tell him exactly what you like

He’s r o u g h

I mean he’s sweet in general but rough in bed, if you’re giving him head he’ll grab your head and force you down, if you’re riding him he’ll grab your hips and buck up beneath you, he’ll go hard in doggy style because he likes to watch your ass jiggle

You’ve always got bruises on your hips like he won’t let them go away

H I G H E S T sex drive

You will be so tired

Sleep? Who needs it. Food? Maybe between sessions

Y’all are fighting? Ok, y’all are gonna fuck it out for like a whole day

Angry sex is SO good with him though

When he shoves you against a wall to kiss you and grind into you, you know it’ll be a good day

If he’s not trying to fuck you then he’s not into you, sorry I don’t make the rules

He likes it when you tease him a little but he gets frustrated quick and dicks you down

If you were into something like cockwarming he’d try it but it would not work out

He’d be inside you for maybe 2 minutes before he’d start fucking you into the mattress

Really leaves an unnecessary amount of hickies you own 7 turtlenecks

He’s oddly shy about mutual masturbation if you suggest it and he won’t finish that way, he’ll get so hot watching you that he’ll dick you down instead

Also part of the “Put a towel down” club when you’re on your period

If you’re out of commission sexually in any way he will beg you for blowjobs and handjobs, anything

Or will fuck you in the shower

Particularly loves it when you suck him off while the water’s hitting his back

He’ll get you all worked up, too, be touching you everywhere and you’ll be lowkey mad you can’t fuck

M o r n i n g s e x

You wake up every goddamn morning with his dick poking you in the back and him kissing your neck

If you tell him you’re too tired he’ll back off but he’ll be huffy

If he falls back asleep 2 hours later he’s trying you again

If you wake him up with a blowjob he’ll be so sweet to you all day, like he’ll fall in love all over again when he lifts the covers to see his cock in your mouth

He’s not too vocal during sex but he is loud during blowjobs because he just loves the visual

He doesn’t have a ton of stamina he’s too much of an eager bunny to fuck you for hours but he’s back up in thirty minutes so it’s not a problem

Never not asking you for nudes, won’t send you a single dick pic even if you ask

If you wear his clothes around him, you won’t be wearing them for long

He loves the way you look in his tshirts

One time it was laundry day and you put on a pair of his boxer briefs and he walks in and says no words to you just jumps you, starts kissing your neck and sticks his hand down his boxer briefs and makes you come in three minutes fast

You should only wear them if you want him to be all over you all day

btw he’s very good with his hands, the best other than Yoongi

He will NOT fuck you in public if you tease him in public though be prepared to be fucked into the next century when you get home

He gets hard at a moment’s notice he won’t even kiss you with tongue if you’re not in private

A strong breeze will give him a boner, particularly if it lifts your skirt a little bit

Will do Skype sex but be embarrassed while doing it, all blushy when you ask him to let you see him he’s so shy about it at first

But when he gets closer to coming he’s all winks and smirks and eyefucking the camera and you lose it

He could watch you touch yourself all day, has a collection of videos you’ve sent to use while he’s on tour

He will deadass jerk off to you in favor of porn

He admits to you with a blush that he’d jacked off to your social media pictures before you even started dating

Would never in a million years make a video with you or of himself he would be so embarrassed to see himself fucking on camera or even in front of a mirror

If he hurts you during sex because he’s too eager he’ll be very sorry afterward

He actually might cry

You’ll end up comforting him instead of the other way around but he’ll be so sweet to you for days

[decorativedust]

HNK chapter 80 thoughts + analysis

I’ve been marinating on this chapter for a few days, and I have some things in mind for it that I’d like to talk about. 

This is just my take on things, and how I’ve interpreted them: mostly phos, aechmea, cairngorm, a tad bit of dia, and my thoughts on the fate of the series. 

Warning for: talk of suicide, spoilers. 

so I have a few very specific things I want to cover: Phos, Aechmea, Cairngorm, Dia, and the fate of the series. 

We’ll start with Phos. 

Personally, one of the biggest draws and attachments for hnk was phos’s transition from a sweet, naive gem to a depressed, anxious, horrifically warped individual. There’s not a lot of series out there where you can actually see a character become changed so drastically in such an intricate manner. I find character development, as a whole, to be extremely interesting. 

Phos’s transition has been building up for the entire series. They kept growing stronger, learned more- but continued to fail over and over again. They tried to make an encyclopedia, and failed. They tried to find a job for shinsa, and failed. They tried to help bring Ventricosus home and got betrayed and lost their legs. They tried to save antarc, and failed. Ghost was abducted trying to save them. They lost nearly all of their body. They couldn’t bring back the ground up gems. Their night raid was a failure and might’ve killed padpa. 

They’ve had a few triumphs- becoming stronger (although I’m ultimately not sure how much good this led to), giving the gems on the moon potentially happier lives (?), and help uncover more of the truth of their world. The gem abductions have seemed to stop entirely. And cinnabar seems to have finally reintegrated back into gem society through their efforts. 

Ultimately though, phos’s life has become full of constant efforts sustained on hope and bravery that almost always end in failure. At the end of the day, how could you not snap? How could you not become a self-doubting, depressed mess? In a world where everyone has given up on you in your efforts to stop the cycle of suffering, how could you not become the despair-filled person that Phos now is? 

I hope they get a satisfying ending. Phos has been fucked over from the beginning. They’re far from perfect, but I believe the things that ultimately drive them are kindness and a desire to end this cycle of pain for everyone- and I think that’s important to keep in mind. 

Now let’s go to Aechmea. 

This man really is an absolute lying bastard, huh? 

There’s no doubt about it- Aechmea straight up lied to EVERYONE about the fate of the other two societies (admirabilis and gems). Honestly, I’m not even sure the lunarians knew about it. I don’t think they did- he genuinely ran lunarian society on the operation that the gems and admirabilis would be around after they disappeared. 

Aechmea gives no indication that the fact that adamant will pray away all remnants of humanity is new information. It serves in Aechmea’s favor that he doesn’t tell anyone, either. While there’s certainly a few gems who likely don’t mind this fate (yellow), i imagine the bulk of admirabilis and gems wouldn’t desire such a fate. And how would the lunarians feel, if they found out the gems and the admirabilis would go with them, especially now that gems and admirabilis have all been on the moon for at least several hundred years at this point? 

Aechmea didn’t care if they took all the gem dust on the moon and tried to reform the gems. Aechmea didn’t harm any of the gems on the moon. He stopped abducting gems. He listened to their demands. Because ultimately, it didn’t matter! None of it mattered, because they’d all die alongside the lunarians anyways! 

I suppose I can find sympathy in their reasons for wanting to cross over to the nothingness. But at the cost of two entire other species? At the cost of killing so many other living things who likely don’t want to die- who don’t even know the fate they’re getting? Is there really nothing else that can be done? You got any lunarian therapy up there? 

Its a hard thing to discuss. Obviously I’ll never know the feeling of being given the ability to live for eternity. Could they have not chosen to build some sort of positive relationship with the admirabilis and the gems, rather than terrorize and use both of them for their own purposes? 

It feels so selfish. I suppose that’s not surprising, given how selfishness is just part of being human- or the personality and essence of humanity, at least. While selflessness is good, we all need a little selfishness sometimes. We need to take time to ourselves and do things for our own goods, rather than contribute ourselves 100% to others and completely burn ourselves out. It seems lunarians (or at least Aechmea) have selfishness in spades, to the point of being utterly apathetic to the fate of gems and admirabilis. 

Now onto Cairngorm. 

They look terrified and horrified the entire chapter. 

Cairngorm is certainly no stranger to the concept of death. They had suicidal thoughts during phos’s first 200 year coma (right after they’d lost their head), they brushed by death when their outer shell (Ghost) was ripped away from their body. They’ve outwardly expressed before how they want to go with Aechmea into the nothingness, and yet- here they are. Not excited, not happy, not anything near positive. 

There’s a giant difference between saying “i will die with you/i want to die” and actually, genuinely embracing death. Its so easy to say something, but so much harder to actually do it, and I think this is when cairngorm is actually, fully realizing this. 

I don’t know whether or not they’re suicidal anymore, but I imagine not. This is probably the happiest they have been in their entire life. Imagine finally overcoming the desire to die, to find a place that makes you so happy - and then to realize that you’re about to lose it all and become nothing. 

If there was ever a time for cairngorm to go against aechmea, its now. If we ever have a moment where cairngorm realizes aechmea lied to them, where cairngorm is finally going to become their own person without being under the rule and command of anyone else, it is now. 

Personally, I’m hoping they’ll somehow attempt to interfere and try and stop Phos, but I’ll cover this more when I talk about the fate of the series. 

Now onto Dia! This is probably the most lighthearted part of the whole chapter. 

They’ve finally shined under their own light. 

This is going back waaaaaaay far into the manga (like chapter 3), but we’re finally seeing some sort of resolution to Dia’s desire to become good at their own thing, without always being second best to Bort. 

I feel like Dia and Phos, at this point, had very similar feelings. Both felt insignificant and useless as a result of not being as good as a fighter as their societal expectations hold them to- leading to feelings of self doubt, and the desire to become better. 

A lot of people have called Dia selfish, for wanting to go somewhere where there is no Bort. Perhaps, a little bit. However, I don’t think Bort was purposefully trying to ‘show off’ and show how much better than Dia they are. They seemed to just be doing it out of the desire to protect Dia. But ultimately, Dia still felt very second-best to them, despite the fact that Dia should’ve been one of the best themselves. Yet their partnership was suffocating for Dia, constantly under the shadow of Bort. It just simply wasn’t healthy. 

But now Dia has found a thing where they’re able to shine under their own light- an idol!!! They seem really happy doing it. They have a whole crowd of adoring fans, too. (blows a kiss to the moon) this is for u dia u fuckin get em 

Finally, onto the last point: The fate of houseki no kuni. 

This really feels like we’re so close to the end, doesn’t it? But how close to that end are we?  As most of us are aware, chapter 80 is just the first chapter in volume 10. So, I find it very hard to believe that Phos is going to be successful in this particular attempt to get sensei to pray. A maximum of 21 minutes is certainly not enough time to tie up all the loose plotlines. What happened to Yellow? To Padpa? How are the earth gems? What about all the stuff that was happening between Cinnabar and Phos? What about the professor? etc etc im probably missing a few things, but you get my point. 

Personally, I think there’s either going to be a gem that wanders out and sees phos going apeshit, and manages to stop them. Or, we’re going to get interference from Cairngorm. Right now Cairngorm seems the most likely candidate, despite the fact that they aren’t physically there. (Boy, if they do that though, I’m afraid to see how aechmea will react.) But I don’t really find it hard to believe that one of the earth gems will wander out, unable or unwilling to sleep. 

Phos, obviously, won’t stop. They haven’t stopped trying for hundreds of years, why would they stop now, unless somehow they also bypassed whatever was preventing sensei from telling them “hey, you’re gonna kill everyone so maybe chill out”. I find it unlikely Sensei would do anything, however. He’s seemed extremely passive towards the gems lately (the most violent he’s ever been towards them was when he yelled at original goshe and morganite and accidentally shattered phos in like.. chapter 1) and aechmea said it himself- he doesn’t seem to be resisting. 

Ending it here feels so.. messy. I like to have a little bit more faith in Ichikawa as a writer. I’ve decided to trust her because she’s written a lot of other things extremely well. Maybe I’ll be putting on my clown wig in a few chapters, but we’ll see. 

[crionsbelt]

This may or may not go up by the time midnight hits or slightly after for me, let’s see what happens! I’ve been working on this since 9:30 PM EST, I expect it’ll be done by 12:50 AM EST. Hopefully I’m right so it ain’t too late gjnhg

For starters: Happy New Year everyone! Hard to believe we lived in the decade where this beauty was created. Nonetheless, there are multiple people I want to thank -- along with a much needed personal note from me. Everything will be put into a read more, but trust me, it’s long. Thank you all for making the final days of this decade very welcoming for me!

@kiidreamu​ & @theabyssalmuses​

It’s rather silly for me to start with you two, because I’ve got quite a bit to say; so here goes! I’ve known you two for...quite a while huh? I can’t recall the exact time, but I know we’ve been mutuals since I went by Phantom -- which was a long while ago. Regardless, I’ve always enjoyed you two on my dash; and I’ve always really liked interacting with y’all OOC! I’ve always had a blast speaking with you two (specifically now w all this fuckin Bear Ass shit).  I really enjoy the way you two write your muses, I think you both should have a lot more faith in them because they’re very fun to see on the dash! It’s pretty clear y’all put a lot of effort into your writing, even if you say you don’t, I for sure notice it.  Hime, I know you said you admired me - but there’s nothing to admire! You and Kii are equally as good as me, but I’m definitely not much. However, I never posted it (because I had it in my drafts and still do) because it meant a lot to me. I’ve never been told something like that aside from Norgie, so it made me feel happy in a dark time.  Thank you both for continuing to be my friends, truly. 

@fantasyacrossworlds​

Awoo! You and I have known each other for a long time, too (most people tagged here I’ve known for 2 - 4 years hujhj)! I’m VERY happy that we’re mutuals again, I’ve truly missed interacting with you! I’m so glad that it seems Orion and Cass are going to have a chaotic friendship that will always end on Orion running to Artemis LMAO. I’m looking forward to more interactions! 

@sanzenxsekai​​ 

I already gave you a super long post explaining how much me and Norgie are thankful for you, so I’ll remind you in a tl;dr version. WE ALL LOVE YOUR STINKY GREMLIN + YOU!! Please keep writing Nobu in 2020! Thank you so much for being such a good friend to me. 

@mcphistcples​

You don’t even realize how much of a positive impact you’ve had on both me and my girlfriend. You’re absolutely hilarious and I’m incredibly happy you chose to start interacting with a disaster like me. As a Dies fan, I fucking love your Rein. You write him fantastically and it’s always fun to see your interactions with BB’s JAlter.  I am looking forward to the dramatic reading of My Immortal: Bear Ass Edition : ) 

@stxrdust-pxper​

We haven’t talked much OOC properly, but we’ve known each other just about the same time as me and Norgie have been dating - so almost 2 years! You’re a pretty cool person, I’m happy you joined my new server because it’s given myself and others a chance to chat with you more. Thank you for all the kindness you’ve given me throughout the time we’ve known each other, I’ve never said it until now, but it truly has stuck with me and helped me become happier.

@bloodsoakedsakura​ / @idoldragos​

There’s actually a lot I’d like to say, some I’ll leave out for now. For starters, thank you for having my back for three years straight. Seriously. You’ve been there for me through a whole lot, honestly surprised you’ve stuck with me for as long as you have.  You’ve stood up for me when the time came for it and I’m honestly so thankful you did. Every time you hop in call with us it’s usually always fun and stupid (in a good way), so thank you for being part of my band of misfits as long as you have Sades. Even though you’re a boomer who didn’t stop me rolling 200 of my Quartz, I forgive you... dontkillmepls

@yuichiroswife​

Speka, you’ve been a great help to me and Norgie a great amount of times as of late. Thank you so much, you’re an incredibly kind person and I’m glad we became friends!!

@muniificus​

I’ve known you for 3 years too I’m 90% certain, it’s insane how long I’ve known a lot of you - it feels like forever but it also feels like time has gone by so quickly! Much like Sades, I’m very thankful you’ve stuck around for as long as you have Icarus. Thank you for putting up with my dumb ass, and ultimately having fun in return! alsoihavethereplyforanastasiadraftedipromise

@fakepriest​

I’ve sent you an ask with a lot of what would’ve been said in here, but I want to let you know that I’m extremely grateful that you’ve kept being my friend to. I enjoy our conversations a lot, especially when we talk about things like Heaven’s Feel because they’re usually always such fun things to talk about. 

Much like the ask I’ve sent you, your Kirei is so scarily accurate it nearly simulates his actual personality flawlessly. That’s how scary good at writing this tofu loving fake priest. I’m so happy it’s you who’s writing him, not to play the pedestal game, but I genuinely can’t see anyone else (not even myself) coming close to how phenomenal your portrayal is.  #kireisquad

@arkdiia​

Though our first conversation first chatting again wasn’t expected, I’m super glad you came back to Tumblr and I’m thrilled to be friends w you again! Hopefully for 2020, you and I /both/ catch a break lmfao.

@saintguine​

Much like Anna, I’ve already told you what I wanted to here in the form of an ask a few hours ago - however, I do wish to say smth that I’m sure a lot of people feel. Regardless of how you think about yourself, you’re a very good person BB and we’re all very blessed to know you. You’re absolutely one of my best friends, and though there was a point where we lost communication for a bit, I’m very grateful our friendship is the exact same. 

We all care u BB, thank u for bein gud to all of us

Kayla & Sere

This post is incredibly long already, luckily I’m just about done -- but I’ve got three people to go starting with you two!

Sere, you’ve heard me vent a lot and you’ve known me (Kayla has known me this long too) for a pretty damn long time if you ask me, 3 years may not seem like a lot to people, but with all the stuff we’ve all gone through these 3 years? It’s been a LOT and I can’t say I’d be the person I am without you hearing my dumb ass vent and creating Cursed Night.  I appreciate all of your icons, thank you for giving us (Hell) special treatment with them. Seriously! While you are a best friend for sure, you’re also practically family to me. Thank you again for everything. 

Kayla, the same of what I said for Sere is said for you. You’re legit like my older sister, you’ve been there for me for just bout the same amount that Norgie has; you’re someone who means a lot to both me and Norgie, so thank you for giving talking to us a chance way back when you were shy (I think that’s what it was!). There have been a lot of ups and downs for all of us, but I’m glad the downs at least had the positive effect of giving me a second family who I love dearly. I actually teared up on this part, so god help me when I write for Norgie.

@letoborn​ / @uwuwrote​

I’m going to save a lot of what I want to say to you for our anniversary in June, but I will say a few things because I love you so very much.

When I met you, I was not expecting you’d turn out to be the woman of my dreams. You’re genuinely my better half, and I have never been as happy as I am than I am with you. You’ve truly had the biggest impact in my life Norgie, you’ve made me laugh, cheered me up when I’m sad, called me out when I was dumb and helped me better myself. 

I’m so incredibly happy I got to spend the rest of the last decade being your boyfriend, and now, going into 2020 - a whole new decade with you. Like I said, you’re my better half - I can’t see myself with anyone else but you. You’re the greatest treasure in my life, I’m so happy we’ve had all this fun with roleplaying.

Thank you so much Norgie, for giving me Orion/Artemiis, all of our other ships - being my soulmate (at least, I think so). I hope 2020 treats us both well, but I’m willing to go through whatever as long as it’s with you.

Now, that’s the end of that -- but I have a few extra things to say.

My 2019 has been...quite possibly the hardest year of my life, at least on the internet. For a very long time, I was fearful of interacting with others - I made mistakes that I wish I could take back, I got put through hell for nothing...man, I don’t wanna go back in and say what happened, what is and isn’t true -- the long story short is, shit happened, but it’s the past now. 

I want to go into 2020 just..as positive as I can be, I’m tired of the drama, I just want to have fun with my friends and my girlfriend you know? So, I’m finally choosing to move on and just...try having fun again. This choice would be impossible without the people mentioned in this post. 

From the bottom of my heart, thank you to all of you who have stuck around through it all for me. I’m so incredibly thankful to be part of the friendgroup I’m in, to know everyone I’ve met who’s put up with me. I’ve had so many times where I wanted to leave this site, but I wanted to keep trying to write with everyone -- to have fun with everyone. You all have no idea how genuinely happy you’ve all made me, just by writing with my Orion and Norgie’s Artemis. 

Though I couldn’t think of anything to say specifically for the others tagged below here, thank you all for everything as well -- just following me makes me happy. I’m sure I’ve forgotten some people, but trust me, I’m so very happy to know all of you.

@dekirukoto @wisesteyed @lacobscur @akhilleuskcsmcs

[prorevenge]

Entitled parent steals from student fund, gets sued over corruption

Hello lads,

I wanted to share a story with you. I'm a 23 YO university student in Slovakia, so please keep in mind English is my 3rd language.

The story evolves around our prom night and our funds (2014 - 2015). In my secondary school of business (commercial academy), we used to pay 50 € into the fund each year to save up for the prom. We had 29 students and accumulated 5 800 € over the period of 4 years. The last year, we had to appoint a parent, who will take care of the finances (managing the account, paying for the things we need, handling the alcohol etc.). Unfortunately, EM "nominated" herself. Other parents were just like "meh, I don't want to do that".

This is where the story begins. EM (Mother) was also a mayor in the small village I live in ( My school was only about 5 min drive from my house to my school in a town nearby). I had also been a really good friend with her son (John) when we were younger. John changed and became unbelievably spoiled over the years. When we entered our new school, he started rubbing his "high life" and how rich he is in everybody's face. Standard rich spoiled a**hole. He was the first to get his new car, always the new iPhone, going on expensive vacations, etc. Simply, nobody could be better or richer than him.

​

As we come close the the prom night, we quickly find that our funds are almost drained out. The girls in our class were really shocked. They had planned the prom to the smallest detail with every cent put to use. We even had to end with 600 € at the end of the prom. Suddenly we had last 50 € in the bank account. Back then, we didn't really care, EM just took more money than she should and she will return it later. We asked the EM, where she spent the money. She just replied "I had spent it where you told me to, the rest I will put back".

​

I didn't believe a single word, but since it was a night before the prom, we didn't care. The prom was nice, we had lots of fun, inviting parents and teachers alike. With best possible food and alcohol for the evening.

The next day we went over our account and found out we were actually 600 € in debt. WTF just happened?! We first checked with the EM. She gave 200 € to the photographer. Paid him even 200 € for the job well done (really stupid) and even another 200 € to get "bluray" discs instead of regular DVDs or CDs. We bought her BS, for a time. We called the photographer. LO and BEHOLD, he only received 200 €. Question was, where did the rest of the money ended up? You guessed it right, in EM's pocket. It was not only that, a couple of 100 € here and 100 € there and you get the picture. WE estimated that out of the 5800 € we have originally had, she "borrowed" 1200 €.

We told our class-teacher and our parents about that. They were all furious at her. She was asked to present cash register receipts to see where the money went. She was red the whole day as she was trying to falsify the receipts. Eventually nobody bought into her lies anymore. She was asked multiple times to cover the losses, but she had always found an excuse (couldn't press charges, as the fund was rather voluntary, and we had no official documents, plus we gave her all the info how to withdraw the money and the credit card). Eventually our graduation came along (Maturita in Slovakia). We had no more money to make a small feast for the teachers before the graduation, as we would never see each-other again. Some of the parents volunteered to bake a cook something for the teachers. The EM came as well, and she even had the courage to eat from the tables our parents voluntarily made, free of cost. She was even asked to stay outside and was not allowed to enter until she pays her debt.

A few day after a get a FB notification from John...and boy..the audacity!

"If everyone in the class would give 20 € more, we would cover the expenses". Suddenly a rich brat turns into a choosing beggar. I told him no. He had a party in the evening since it was his B-day, so I went there. I handed him a bottle of Jack Daniels (because he gave it to me on my B-day, saying I could never afford it myself) and told him "We're done, I'm not your friend".

I couldn't let it slide. Her husband had covered the expenses eventually but it wasn't good enough. She stole from her son and from his classmates. From what I know she is a fraud (tax evasion, accountancy fraud, falsifying documents and even extortion). What we did is, we rounded up what evidence we had on her (for stealing from our fund) and we handed all the to the prosecutor, who was investigating her case (working on her corruption charges at that time, it would give a great profile of the person, who steals from her son). The trial was delayed several times ( due to her knowing "some people"). But we eventually, we put her under so much stress, she couldn't even think straight. We sometimes wrote messages on her FB page asking for her confession to the police and even sending emails to her detailing her "SCAM".

After a while she was making even bigger mistakes. She was trying to avoid this trial, as much as possible. She wouldn't want to be confronted by "stealing from a prom fund, from her son". Her actions got to her fast. There are still ongoing corruption investigations (3 I know of) as well as abuse of powers as a public official. There is also a warrant to arrest her (don't know if they really did). Since the last trial of another scam, she even had to pawn her house, sell her car even her son's motorcycle. She's now in hiding.

John didn't make it far either. As a spoiled brat he was unable to find a steady job (had like 8 Jobs in 2 years, and dropped out of college after only one winter semester). Rumors have it he deals in pot nowadays. The only person I pity, is EM's husband, John's father. He was the only actual nice guy in their family, even stood up for me once in primary school. EM didn't want to pay money she borrowed from a bunch of other people on HIS name, so she made him announce bankruptcy and possible insanity. To this day, he is still married to her (as far as I know). As I remember him, he once told me "family is the most important thing a man can look up to, to make him feel proud, to fell like you a part of something". Now, I feel like, he has nowhere else to go, but to stay with her.

​

Long story short; EM steals money from our fund, we put pressure on her and give up evidence in court to show what b*tch she is in court, EM tries to avoid everybody.

(source) story by (/u/TDuranteTech)

[dawggcs]

all american twilight rejects

pippa, member @ the red council:

usually chill but going through a rebellious phase (probably a mid life crisis but being immortal u know)

she’s turned by kamala centuries ago bc she was about to die after being beaten to near death yikes

very calm and peaceful, also very curious about everything

kinda snobbish so she likes keeping traditions and whatever

tends to coddle everyone in the clan and it 10/10 makes them sick but they all secretly love it (just bc i said so aight u can fite me on this)

she’s not too social outside her clan, doesn’t trust other vamps and prefers to stay quiet if they ever have any visitors

hayoung, member @ clan 3:

a youngster, she’s just recently come out of her immortality depression after seeing his late husband die probably lmfao

she’s one of those that got turned against her wishes and was bitter about it. she focused on watching over her family to avoid thinking about it and now has to deal with it, albeit slowly. she probably avoids the topic by watching her children now that her former husband died.

after her ‘awakening’ she didn’t try to get in contact with her human family. she saw them mourn her enough and kept a safe distance.

she’s a lil scaredy cat so she just follows whatever orders ppl give her lmao

tries to cling to her humanity somewhat, she’s one of the vamps that avoids feedings and stretches them out as much as she can.

she’s got a thing for crystal work so her house is probably filled with it :/

jaehwa, member @ clan 3:

he actually asked to be turned. his family has a history of it and he’s one of the oldest, most influential members in it.

used to be ruthless and messy during his first 200 yrs but then he collected himself lmao

he keeps tabs on his family line, constantly checking in on ppl. he turns a few people on his bloodline, though not many. junseo (he refers to her by that name only) included.

he’s also big on tradition but is trying real hard at updating himself with the times

he used to be a notorious leader in his family’s clan but decided to take a break. he’s now enjoying life as a member in a different clan instead of being the one in charge.

he still advises the newer leaders of his family clan, though. keeps scrutiny on who wanna turn there after he had to disposed of 60 or so members after a riot a decade ago.

atticus, member @ clan 3:

not that old. he was an experiment of sorts since a young vamp wanted to see if he could build an army and started turning ppl at random. atticus was among them.

however, this bitch just straight up turned his back and searched for other vamps that vibed with him more, didn’t care about being turned either.

as a human he was struggling to make ends meet and didn’t have a family of his own, instead staying with his parents. in a way, being turned felt like a huge weight was off his shoulders.

he’s really just trying to survive, has probably contemplated how he could die but doesn’t actively pursuing that. it’s an idea he toys with in case he ever gets tired of ‘living’.

aggressive, he just kinda likes fighting and is good at it. he’s a brute force kind of guy who has been learning about tactics and strategy now.

the thing he misses the most about being human is eating. he’s particularly wistful whenever he sees plums (unless these vamps can eat in which case i’ll take this off lmao).

yer a wizard

lester, member @ the pentacle:

comes from a respected fam of witches but he lowkey a mess. his family is well versed within dark magic and they keep high standards as to what a member ought to be like. in a way, he’s the shamed kid in his family tree.

honestly he’s terrible at incantations and spells, but is an a+ summoner. very few people know this, however, as he’s tried to keep it hushed as his own little vengeance against his family.

the neighbourhood guy tbfh, friendly and chatty with everyone he crosses paths with

he’s book smarts, if anyone ever needs to know about any spells, potions, ingredients, whatever --- they consult with him. the witchcraft walking encyclopedia for any questions or research. if he doesn’t know the answer himself, he always knows where to search for it.

he likes cats, has 2 and they’re his life.

ritual sacrifice though no one except his sisters know. he’s somewhere among the living and death, which is the reason he’s so good at summonings. 

lulu, member @ the pentacle:

older identical twin of lola, their parents have a thing with names with ‘l’ bc they supposedly bring good luck to the family.

she’s really embarrassed of lester all the time.

the twins share a close bond and are usually seen together, they’re talented and help upheld the fam reputation lmfao

lulu specializes in potions and projections.

she’s the kinder twin, more polite. she’s also the one who likes to think things through.

has a thing for anything with turtles in it and owns about 5 tortoises that all roam wild in the house.

though she doesn’t have anything against other species, she doesn’t go out of her way to mingle with them. in a way, she’s the one who keeps up with the family’s snobbish ways of considering witches a scale above the rest.

lola, member @ the pentacle:

younger identical twin of lulu.

she actually enjoys spending time with his brother. he kinda teaches her how to be more patient and less confrontational.

her speciality are curses lmfao and talismans

she’s a risk taker, gets in trouble all the time, though doesn’t typically face any repercussions bc she’s that good. it also helps that her sis and her bro help her out always asldjfadsf

she loves iguanas, has 3 and they all roam around with lulu’s tortoise lmfao

she loves milkshakes, 15/10 times you’ll see her stopping by to get one.

she loves, loves hanging out with other species. the more diversity, the more trouble there can be.

sasha, member @ the coven of the moon:

athena’s older sis. they’re the first two people to show signs of magic in their family after a looooong time. they’re kinda exploring and rolling with it.

the sisters decide to join different covens in their search for answers and guidance. they share information constantly.

she’s decent at any topic, doesn’t really stand out in any as she has a avarage control over them all. (will develop an affinity for light magic and healing in particular, aided by water).

she loves singing, probably does it all the time and people are sick of her bc of it

loves to have fun, will definitely jump at any given opportunity to spice things up

kinda mischievous, though she tries to keep in mind the rules so as not to cross them

puppies (liza, 2020)

amaia, member @ the boldclaw pack:

older sister to kiseon, she baby that kid always and it probably embarrasses him

she’s right hand and tends to be more patient than other ‘alphas’. if anything rub her the wrong way though, she gonna snap in no time

really, she just wants everyone to feel safe like that’s her main goal in life

used to be very weak and sickly as a child so when she matured ppl were surprised, esp when she started making her way onto the higher ranks in the pack

although pack life consumes most of her energy, amaia tries hard to figure how to keep up a life outside of it. she’s the one who encourages people to try out different things and paths.

arthur, member @ clan 6:

loves working out, spends a lot of time with his bro bc of it. they have a thing against shirts, aimee and i already established this for everyone’s benefit bYE

he’s actually very touchy, so he’s always finding ways to be in physical contact with people

he a lil dumb but it ok bc he has a good heart. u know what, i really want u all to think seth clearwater when u see this man lmfao

he likes betting, probs always plays for dumb things like who’s going to get yelled at first or whatever

he likes exploring on his own, probably spends a lot of time outside because of it. it sometimes gives his pack a headache, though he’s always there when they need him to.

zane, member @ clan 6:

appearances fooling ppl bc he out there looking like he gonna be in charge but really zane the biggest softie out there lmao

he’s the one trying to avoid conflict and looking at alternatives for solutions

shy and quiet, he just keep silent to let things unfold as they should

despite hating physical altercation, he still keeps up training so as to not be dead weight. he’s good at it and even teaches the younger members.

he’d 10/10 die for anyone he cared about, stupid loyal puppy

he used to keep away from anything related to his species. possibly avoided any type of relationship in that regard bc he really wanted to be normal. when he found out that there’s a whole world of species out there, he started working on coming to terms with. at times he still struggles and wishes he could live independently but he also knows that he likes being in a group.

chonglin, member @ the boldclaw pack:

unlike his meme-y name LMAO he’s very serious

he’s an action kinda guy, though. always the first to jump in, albeit a lil recklessly. ppl sometimes have to hold him by the neck or he’ll get into trouble lmao

he finds the notion of a werewolf adopting a dog fascinating but has not yet found The One for him. he’s not giving up and is still looking.

he likes clever people and is always reading up on some new topic for more fun conversations

he’s very open to species mingling and enjoys being friendly with others. he’s a lil bit more careful around humans, though around other supernaturals he’s v. chill and doesn’t hide his nature ja feel

[cleaduvalls]

i watched “spy kids” 4 times in 1 week and here are my thoughts

carmen your nightgown is like 200 years old, get a new one

you clearly know this story by heart, you’re saying parts of it. why are you questioning what “take him out” means

a double wig should be more obvious than that

we can see that that’s a glass elevator. people can see you changing, ingrid

nice hat

why did you kill the swan

is that paul rudd???????

how are jets ripping pages out of a book

heart shaped parachutes shouldn’t be working that well

why is there a guitar on your bed. how do you sleep

i think the kids would have seen the track in the floor at SOME point

why is there a jungle gym in their house. i know they’re spies but who has a jungle gym.... in their HOUSE

carmen you’re a frog

i think juni just legitimately try to kill carmen

why are both parents going to school. is that like, a Thing????

juni how do you do that

who puts a video screen in the front seat

hey look its floop. love that guy

they’re not picking on you for the bandages, it’s cuz you brought the toys OUTSIDE your backpack. always put them inside. trust me

did his mirror just.... zoom in?????

h*ck yeah beat him up greg

do all the other kids hate him too??????

dang that hurt

“chief” that’s so white

stupid kid. his dads a spy

that floop doll isn’t even close to accurate

hey look its floop again. love that dude

Big Willy Wonka Energy

oooh skipping numbers i see. love that

why do the subtitles have “mr. floop” as his name. its just floop, yall

“sometimes in order to think big you have to think small” pretty inspirational tbh

oh hes fidgeting!!!!!! love that

woah what are you doing this is rated pg ingrid

i wish my uncles would tell me im shrinking. they just make small talk abt school 😔

this gradenko lady looks like jan from the office

hey its floop again!!!!! love that dude

yes juni. its a fire drill in your own home

these dudes have a jungle gym AND a pool. what the h*ck

why did you pull off your mustache to prove you’re not related. if anything that makes you more related. greg does that too

why did he put the mustache back ON

where did those boats come from

carmen says manual weird. man-yull

right, cuz adrenaline causes warts

“don’t touch anything” *immediately touches everything*

basic boat ettiquette: don’t shit in the boat. those toilets can’t handle anything

is that globe..... punched in???????

floop!!!!!!! love that dude

feet on the desk????? i dunno seems pretty gay

since when did carmen get keys to that

i might be wrong but i dont think thats every country

what does pressure have to do with positioning a laser

this floor is the best mechanic in the whole movie. reminds me of a richie rich comic i had as a kids

why did they not run into the wall. i wanted to see that

is the slide there when floop films his show????

HEY ITS FLOOP!!!! love that dude

theres a bunch of normal food like.... sour worms. why did they pick the slime from charlie and the chocolate factory when johnny depp finds the oompa loompas

thats a sick coat. best one in the movie

that was a good snap. nice acoustics

God what a power move. something thanos would say

listen floop i love you but thats not how you say research

fELIX NO

and hes gone. cool

did she kick the camera?????

haha author unknown. cuz hes a spy

why did you take that one specifically????? plot convenience????

he can still be a spy, just not a good one. learn to read

is that supposed to be a question?????

FUN FACT if you listen closely when carmen says “like felix said” you can hear a weird cut in “said”, almost like its a new clip

theres no keyhole

i think juni can read. why are you spelling it

did you have the floop toys in your pocket????

OKAY THIS SCENE WHERE THEY PLAY IT BACKWARDS?????? THAT MESSED ME UP AS A KID 

what do those things do?????

i can feel the pain from the fan blades

how did that break the chain????

why would you annouce that. they can hear you. just because they’re thumbs doesn’t mean they’re deaf

that’s a thing, not a place

FLOOP!!!!! ON A BILLBOARD!!!! love that dude

how are you slipping. shes holding YOU

YOU DROPPED HIM GENIUS

how do people not notice the jetpack dudes

DOES NO ONE CARE THAT CLOTHES WERE STOLEN

that’s a cute coat

why is the lady cool with carmen just... doing that

HEY I LOVE THIS SONG!!!!!!!!! AND THAT DUDE!!!!!

ofc you can’t think “straight enough” you’re gay

why is mexico sepia tone

when do you think juni had time to change and learn a new language

IF IT HURTS TO HIT HIM, S T O P

i wanna be on that merry-go-round

HOW DO YOU K N O W THAT HIS CODE NAME. WHY “MUST” IT BE HOMBRE

i love how junis just like “we already got a fake uncle”

LOOK AT HOW FLOOP IS SITTING!!!!!!!! THATS GAY!!!!!!! HE IS A HOMOSEXUAL!!!!!!!!

ALSO MORE FLOOP!!!! say it with me, LOVE THAT DUDE!!!!!!!!!!

minion looks like barry from friends

wait i lied this coat is better

we DO have uncles like that!!!!!

if your inventions are so good why is your font so BORING

hey wait carmen said that. hmmmmmmmm 🤔🤔🤔

glowsticks dont help you see like at all

the map looks like gallifreyan but its not. spy kids is older than the doctor who reboot

they go ZOOM

THATS NOT HOW YOU SAY MANUAL!!!!!!!

great job carmen YOU wrecked the plane

WHATS A REGULATOR

oh its just a breathing thing

haha pee joke. funney

where are the brains coming from???? that factory is Not Correct

if i were juni i would look back over all the floop’s fooglies tapes and see what the agents were saying backwards. once the mission was done, ofc

it took me like 5 minutes to figure out what sknaht meant the first time

SEE THIS MECHANIC IS GOOD BC NOW THERES NO PLEXIGLASS

WHY DOES NO ONE RUN INTO THE WALL

F L O O P  I S  G O D

love that dude

you discussed with the spy parents that juni watched the show. he just told you that you took his parents. you KNOW this is juni, why are you surprised that he watches it????? you already know!!!!!!

tbh i kinda want some of those colorful chains. they’d look cool somewhere

haha voice crack

no wonder your shows not doing well. those are awful times

why is there a sexy thumb nurse. why did floop make the thumb nurse sexy

use her first name?????? you’re clearly dating

!!!!!! THEY USED THE SAME TOOL MULTIPLE TIMES!!!!!! UNHEARD OF!!!!!!!

he cares so much about this show!!!!!! its so sweet!!!! love that dude

YEP THIS COAT IS BETTER, LOOKS A M A Z I N G IN A RUNNING SCENE

haha you killed carmen

ok this scene with the acid crayon is like my absolute favorite. something about using a crayon to escape and then floop (love that dude) opening the door a second later and then doing a double take. FAVE

wheres belize

ok so apparently its a country by mexico

no you CANT tell her you need to ESCAPE

we finally got a clean outside shot of the castle.... that place is wack

haha minion can’t sit in the hand chair correctly because hes STRAIGHT what a loser

hey juni HOW DO YOU DO THAT

minion you know what the robot costumes look like AND what juni looks like. dont be stupid

what..... what do you want carmen for, exactly, minion??????

floop is supportive of others’ art!!!!!!!!!!! love that dude

HE SAID “WHERE’S MOM AND DAD” LIKE THEY’RE HIS OWN PARENTS THAT’S SO C U T E

ALSO ANOTHER SCENE WITH THE GREAT RUNNING COAT

he says doppelganger beautifully

“its too late” that timing was BEAUTIFUL

you COULD take 500 brains out if you just TRIED HARDER. still love that dude

his control panel has buttons that spell “floop”

WHY CAN MINION TALK NORMAL

if its reversible why do you have it in later movies

carmen fights fake juni and juni fights fake carmen because they didnt have the fancy clone (?) technology

THREE TIMES!!!!!! THEY USED THE SAME TOOL T H R E E  T I M E S THIS HAS NEVER BEEN SEEN BEFORE!!!!!!!!!!!

nice censorship

HOW DID MACHETE SMASH ONLY THE CLEAR WINDOWS AND A L L THE CLEAR WINDOWS THERE ARE NO MORE CLEAR WINDOWS!!!!!! ANYWHERE!!!!!

wow nice 3 buttons thats totally how you hack

oh look they have all died

oh. guess not :((

machete you better rip off your mustache

HES GOING TO JUNIS LEVEL TO TALK TO HIM!!!!!!! HE RUFFLED HIS HAIR!!!!!!!!! HES GONNA MAKE A GREAT DAD!!!!!!!

wow no shit ingrid

did he leave his wart bandaid on the kitchen counter?????

ALAN CUMMING!!!! ON A CEREAL BOX!!!!

ok CLEARLY other people watch floop’s show, he’s rated number 2. kids at the school are gonna recognize juni and carmen. they better get popular

is that george clooney

well that’s not how it works in spy kids 2. or 3. or 4. or the tv show