#the last kingdom headcanon

[witchthewriter]

𝐁𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐩𝐨𝐥𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐔𝐛𝐛𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐅𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐧 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞

⤷ gender neutral and any size reader. Requests are open, thank you for reading!

a/n: a long awaited cross over that I promised months ago.. please do not hate me! Also, Danes = vikings, but the word viking is also a verb. So, you could say 'Hey Ma I'm off to go viking!'.

Saxons = those from England

Celts are an umbrella term for Native Britons who were here before the Saxons.

ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ | ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ ᴵᴵ

It didn't make sense.

Ubbe's shoes walked the length of the boat and back again. Creaking wherever he put his feet, the wind was howling. Even during the day. With the sun high in the sky; not that he could see it.

None of the men or women could see more than five feet in front of them. Once he, along with two other ships left Kattegat, the mist had surrounded them.

Ubbe had the mind to turn back, but he couldn't see the shorline of Kattegat. Only the thick whirls of fog surrounding the boats.

What would have been a long journey, was shortened to mere seconds. And Ubbe was in a place he did not wish to be.

It was a place where his father had died. Where a many great Viking men had died.

But something was different. The time, Ubbe knew it; years had passed somehow. Many, many years. And when he took 4 men into a tavern to investigate, he asked and was told.

Ubbe and his men had gone through 100 years on the water.

・Life had gotten better since Uhtred and his men frequented your village - hell, everywhere had gotten better; not only were the raids less and less.

・But safety and hope were two words that Uhtred of Bebbanberg gave the people

・Well, Uhtred along with his three men - Finan, Sihtric & Osferth.

・You always had a crush on Finan. His Irish charm and humour always brightened your day.

・But he had never ventured for more than conversation and company

・You thought he must have an eye on someone else, but news never reached your ears about anyone else.

・And then something happened.

・Two ships full of Danes had washed on Englands' shores. It was not like any other raid. The Danes spoke differently, their weapons seemed old and the way they dressed was so ... incredibly different to the Danes you all knew

・Where did they come from? Why hadn't any other Dane claimed to know them? And why couldn't they point to where they were from on a map?

・These thoughts plagude you for days. You did your chores and you thought about it, you cooked and cleaned - and thought about it.

・However, curiosity won out and you snuck into the woods to get a better look at the semi-prisoners.

・One man caught your eye instantly.

・And he ...

・He was ... beautiful.

・Outlandishly so, you hadn't seen such a man and with so many unique tattoos...

・His hair was long and braided, parts shaved on the sides and you were taken aback.

・A blush creeping so bright you swore he would be able to see you in the dark - like a beacon of sorts

・But a body had bumped against your own, a hand over your mouth. You bit down - hard and Osferth hissed

"Ow!" He said, trying to keep his voice low as he flung his hand about in pain.

"Well don't do that!" You whispered incredulously.

"What are you staring at?" whispered Osferth, crouching down and following your line of sight.

"No-nothing, nothing, stop it-"

"Ooh got your eye on somethin' then?" he mocked.

・You rolled your eyes and pushed him. He caught your arm and hoisted himself up, catching you against him in the process.

・This back and forth behaviour was normal between you and Osferth. As soon as you met, it had started.

・He knows about your feelings for Finan, and has helped you to gain his attention time and time again

・The only failure in this was the fact that he didn't want to put you at risk. Finan couldn't bear to have you as some sort of target.

・But god did that change when Ubbe started talking to you.

・You decided to help around with the new Danes

・Your skills were highly renound and useful no matter who you were with

・Ubbe did everything he could to get your attention and soon Finan became a shell of his witty self.

・Grouchy and sensitive, Finan couldn't stop watching the two of you interract.

"I mean wha' does she see in 'im??"

"- Finan, please-" Uhtred interjected, trying to calm him down. He did not calm down.

"Just tell her how you feel-" Sihtric exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air.

"I - I cannot."

"You cannot what?" You said coming up behind him, the trees and darkness hiding you easily.

・From that day on you and Finan were together, but the subject of Ubbe hung loosely in the air.

・However, your relationship was changed because of Ubbe. Who shocked both you and Finan.

"It is true, I want you. But I want both of you. The funny one as well."

・Finan gulped.

・Your relationship is very loving. It truly is.

・There's a lot of PDA

・But even more affection when people aren't around

・Like casually sitting on each other's laps

・Forehead Touches

・The union between all three of you created something. It was peace.

・Peace settled over the group, a sense of ease becoming easier and easier to grasp.

𝑹𝒆𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒑 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆𝒔

Shut Up” (You) x “Make Me” (Ubbe) x “Just Kiss Already.” (Finan)

Found Family

Intuitive & Attentive (Finan) x Restless & Flirty (Ubbe) x Witty & Intuitive (You)

𝑹𝒐𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒄 𝑷𝒍𝒐𝒕 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆

Intertwined Destinies

Love Transcending Boundaries

Legacy and Legend

𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒎𝒆 𝑺𝒐𝒏𝒈

Scotland by the BBC Scottish Symphony Orchestra

Golden Years by David Bowie

To Bring You My Love by PJ Harvey

[lexyleblancc]

Prank wars -TLK headcanons

Summary: The men of coccham are growing restless in their downtime, so Finan comes up with the most brilliant idea; prank the baby monk. 

If you have any other suggestions for headcanons regarding the TLK men or the TLK men x reader then let me know!

- Finan and Sihtric are pretty ruthless when it comes to pranking Osferth 

- poor baby monk never sees them coming 

- coccham is quiet and the men can find themselves bored quickly most days 

- pranks vary from different extremes 

- banging pots and pans beside Osferth’s head while he’s sleeping, stealing his shoes or clothes when the warrior-monk is bathing, “forgetting” to tell Osferth that they are needed early for meeting with Uhtred 

- the pranks are almost always Finan’s idea, the man can’t sit still for longer than 2 minutes without getting antsy 

- sihtric is along for the ride, the pranks make him laugh and he’d rather be helping than be on the receiving end of finans boredom 

- osferth is typically a good sport about it, laughing with his friends after the initial shock of things. 

- however after one prank in particular leaves osferth a blushing mess attempting to hide himself behind some bushes after the two steal all of his clothes, several woman passing by while laughing, osferth goes to uhtred 

- the baby monk tattles on his friends 

- osferth comes clean about all the pranks his friends have pulled on him 

- it’s uhtred’s idea, much to gisela’s disappointment, that osferth and himself team up 

- thus the start of the coccham prank wars that will go down in history 

- the now dynamic duo go out of their way to prank finan and sihtric 10 times harder 

- finan wakes up with a baby goat in his bed 

- sihtric is greeted with a pile of horse shit on his front door, the man’s boots ruined after that one. 

- finan and sihtric retaliate just as bad 

- osferth woke up to find all his breaches gone, strung up in the streets of the little village 

- uhtred jumping back in shock when he knocks over a pile of sparing weapons, making the man deal with the cries of his children for hours until his wife finally comes to save him 

- gisela has to put an end to the prank war weeks after it started 

- the village in a state of chaos due to their four most reliable warriors running around like a group of headless chickens 

- the prank’s definitely died down for awhile 

- but on the road gisela isn’t there to scold them 

- and finan and sihtric are out for revenge

[demaparbat-hp]

Golden Boy (and Silver Girl) for the Kintsugi AU.

[therossgarden]

So, I was thinking about something in LOK.

You know the Earth Queen Hou-Ting? You know, the woman who secluded airbenders and that Zaheer killed?

This one?

Well, as you all may know, she’s King Kuei’s only daughter.

I’m sure you all remember King Kuei, the puppet king with the bear.

This guy.

Well, I made some calculus. He must’ve been in his early/mid 20s in ATLA. And his daughter had to be in her 50s/early 60s when she died.

In the meantime, Zuko is 87/88 in 171AG, when LOK3 takes place. Since his daughter is commonly believed to be around Bumi and Kya’s age, I’d speculate that she’s around 60 in her appearance in LOK4, in 174AG and when Zuko is 90 (Tenzin is 51 in 170AG and Kya is roughly 4 years older than him, so Izumi must be between 5 and 7 years older than him, which places her in a range between 60 and 62 years old).

(See? Roughly the same age)

So, my point? I think during their diplomatic visits, Zuko and Kuei had to spend a lot of time in each other’s company because, monarch stuff. And given that they were both heirs to their respective thrones, Izumi and Hou-Ting had to spend a lot of time together.

I don’t know why, but I imagine those two having the wildest, silliest yet most hateful beef as teens. And given Hou-Ting’s despicable behavior and authoritarian politic in contrast to what shown of Izumi, a rational leader who cares for her people, I am even more convinced that those two despised each other.

So yeah, I can’t stop picturing Izumi and Hou-Ting insulting the crap out of each other while saving face in front of the subjects. And I can’t stop laughing

[do0hwa]

Zutara Earth Kingdom AU pt2 (zuko working as a blacksmith)

Er I still couldn’t stop thinking about this au so I brought a pt 2 :D

What if Zuko worked as a blacksmith?

The au I’m referring to is this post below (link) ⤵️

그림 그리다가 벌써 새벽 됐네용 저는 이제 자러 가보겠습니다~

[transfinan]

The looks on Osferth and Sihtrics faces when Edward sits at their table is so funny to me. Like we know Osferth hates Edwards guts but this look from Sihtric?

U know they bitch about him constantly. They're having little gossip sessions at the back of the party on horseback. Sihtric is osferth's unliscenced therapist and all he says is "ugh ur so right, fuck that bitch" I can feel it in my soul

[kingslionheart]

tlk never beating the queer show allegations 🌈 part 1/? | haesten and his poorly hidden pansexuality

[rosie-kairi]

Ephemer: They're all so tinyyyyyy (┬┬﹏┬┬) Rosemary: Ephy, hun, you're crying more than the babies...

The Rosephemer fan-kid triplets!!💐

Reginae, Juncea, and Nicolai (all different types of Strelitzia :>)

Reginae and Juncea's designs were inspired by Strelitzia's beta designs :)

[tovalhallaandback]

Does anyone else headcanon star signs for our beloveds?!?

A few of mine:

Stiorra: Scorpio Sun. Perhaps Leo Rising. But also maybe some Sagittarius placements?

Sigtryggr: Libra but also Sagittarius Sun. Maybe some Cancer Placements. An Aries Rising.

Finan: Capricorn Sun

Uhtred: Aries or a Leo Sun

Gisela: Virgo Sun

Hild: Taurus Sun

[rosegoldenatlas]

Smallishbeans hadcanon/au that connects every series he in like a spiderweb of idk anymore

sorry its all in image form I did this while on a four hour drive and it didn't wanna save.

Anyways that's all of it for now. As you can tell I love fae folklore and putting my own spin on it. Byee

[witchthewriter]

𝐒𝐢𝐡𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐜 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐡𝐮𝐬𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞

⤷ gender neutral, ambiguous race, and any size reader. Requests are open, thank you for reading!

Warnings: some spoilers for the series xx

ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ | ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ ᴵᴵ

ISTP

Hufflepuff

Chaotic Good

Scorpio Sun, Sagittarius Moon, Cancer Rising

𝑺𝑭𝑾🌿

・The most sweetest, most gentle and most loyal husband you could ever imagine.

・Exactly like the ones in the romance novels - you are his world.

・And he would do ANYTHING for you. Sounds cliche but he would literally climb the tallest mountain, ask Uhtred to help him bring down the moon, Sihtric is crazy in love with you. And it doesn't stop after the honeymoon phase.

・Any part of your body that you dislike, Sihtric is the first one to be like "what? I don't get it. You are ... the most glorious person to ever walk on midguard."

・Has cried while alone when he's away from you.

・Not when he's been asked by Uhtred to spy though - he just thinks about you when it's safe to do so (he takes caring for his friends very seriously. He's big on loyalty.)

・Further with the loyalty comment; it's actually hilarious that it was he and Uhtred who set up that ruse in season 3. Sihtric would rather die than actually be that person

・Buys you any and every kind of jewellery; bracelets, rings, earrings, necklaces. If you follow his religion/way of life, then he buys you your own thor's hammer pendant.

・When he places it around your neck, he tugs you forward and leans his head against your forehead.

・Calls you, "sweetheart," "my love," "beautiful/handsome". But also likes to call you cheeky ones too: "troublemaker," "danger."

・Puppy god eyes, puppy dog eyes, PUPPY DOG EYES. He doesn't even know he's doing it. It was practically beaten out of him when he was younger by his father and half-brother.

・But when he realised he was doing it, Sihtric thought, 'I have never felt safe enough to act like this. With anyone.'

𝑹𝒆𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒑 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆𝒔

Calm bf (Sihtric) x Hyper gf/bf/non-binary partner (You)

Gives Jewellery (Sihtric) x Tries To Wear Everything Every Day To Make Them Happy (You)

Black Cat (You) x Black Bat (Sihtric)

𝑹𝒐𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒄 𝑷𝒍𝒐𝒕 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆

Enemies to Lovers

You first saw Sihtric when he was living with his wretched father. You never expected to find him tied up under Uhtred's command.

𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒎𝒆 𝑺𝒐𝒏𝒈

Lady of the Dawn by Peter Gundry

𝑁𝑆𝐹𝑊 🔞 No one under the age of 18 past this point.

・When he first gets back from being away from you, he's hungry - like a dog in heat, he's rough, he needs to feel you, all of you.

・Sihtric's favourite thing to do is go down on you. Your juices, your smells; it drives him mad.

・After he's made you cum thrice, he rubs your cum/juices on his clothes just in case he has to leave again. He wants to be able to smell you.

・It has become a ritual now - if he doesn't then it's bad luck in his mind.

・If Sihtric is home for a while then his fucking turns into love making. Gentle, loving, slow, passionate.

・Long strokes, in and out of you while kissing every part of your face from above, nuzzling his face into your neck.

・Has a massive breeding kink (even if your body does not have the means to create a child); he likes to talk dirty while pumping into you.

"That's it, let me cum inside you my love. I want to put a child in you."

・When you agree with a whimper, it sends him over the edge. Hot ropes of cum shooting inside you.

・Sihtric keeps pumping though. The fantasy of having a large family with you made his cock hard again.

[infinitelilith]

I couldn't trace the source for this (I need to learn Japanese on god) so take this with a grain of salt but if this turns out to be true then oh my god we're all a bunch of clowns LMAO

[demaparbat-hp]

I didn't know Katara also had silver marks on the Kintsugi AU. How did you come up with that idea? Is it an in-universe cultural thing? If it is, is it exactly the same as Zuko's or does the Water Tribe have their own beliefs around it?

Sorry if I'm asking too many questions, I just really love how your mind works when it comes to these AUs 💖

Hello, and thanks for asking!

Initially, Kintsugi was a strictly Fire Nation tradition. Something to hold over the rest of the nations, and deepen their own belief of cultural superiority. Zuko hiding his scars played into that idea, since having gold inlaid in your body is a clear sign of Fire Nation blood—furthermore, High Fire Nation blood.

That being said, one lovely anon gave the suggestion that perhaps the other nations also have their own kinds of Kintsugi, and I fell in love with the idea. @ican-fixitbooks went even deeper into the particular philosophies of each nation regarding Kintsugi. I'll be using some quotes from them—watch for the italics.

It was during said brainstorming session that I thought of Katara having a silver Kintsugi scar, and how could it be used to enhance the themes of ATLA, Katara's arc, and this AU as a whole.

But a little background is necessary, I believe.

Kintsugi is a tradition practiced worldwide, with minor differences in philosophy/technique according to each nation.

The Earth Kingdom seal their scars with a substance that resembles bronze, as the mentality of breaking yourself down to build yourself back up better than you were is very central to their culture. It is used as a way to celebrate one's victories, made all the better if damage was taken to achieve it.

The elite have rather different views on this practice. They believe themselves to be above such things. That which is broken must be hidden away, which has interesting connotations when thinking about a certain blind earthbender.

The Air Nomad philosophy leans towards a naturalist approach. Anything natural doesn't need to be "improved" in their eyes. If a scar is there, it is there. Let it be there as a part of you, no different than any other, no need to be "made better", but in fact better to just "be".

Kintsugi is a cultural practice meant to celebrate making something beautiful out of something broken, arguably even making it better than it was. During Sozin's reign and forward, Kintsugi became a way to show the Fire Nation's superiority. Especially as that is essentially their philosophy for war: "Breaking the rest of the world so it can be reforged in fire, made a better, more perfect place."

As for the Water Tribes, there's the healing factor to take into account. The Northern Water Tribe isolated itself from the rest of the world once the war began, so they hold tight to their traditions and beliefs. If something is not broken, then why attempt to fix it? Kintsugi is scoffed at in the North—it is a foreign practice, one that is not necessary when all your wounds can be healed with bending.

However, the Southern Water Tribe has been exposed to the world. They have seen war. They have lived through it. They have suffered, but they are also free because of it, if only in spirit. The South is strong and proud and bold, so it comes as no surprise that silver Kintsugi becomes the mark of their warriors, their hunters, their people.

Katara was wounded during the last Southern Raid. After losing Kya in such a terrible way, Hakoda made sure to seal Katara's wound with the silver of their warriors, so that she would always remember that despite having been broken, she is still strong, beautiful, and proud.

The scar itself is long and thin, going from her right shoulder up to her jaw. It loosely resembles lightning.

And despite how she got it, despite all the things she lost on that day, despite it being a constant reminder of her mother's death—Katara loves her scar.

It grounds her. It pushes her forward. You are a warrior, it tells her. You are a survivor.

When Katara arrives at the North, her scar becomes yet another thing the Northerners hold against her. They use it to demean her, just as they do her gender and out-spoken personality.

The North believes a lot of things that Katara always considered natural to be a problem. What does it matter that she is a woman? What is wrong about being passionate? Why should having a scar mean she's broken?

This scar is something they cannot touch. The Northerners try to use it to demean her. To make her small. Self-conscious. Worthless.

They're scoffing at her mother's death.

Her strength.

Her beauty.

Her pride.

Her story.

And she will not allow it.

[flareprince]

“You’re hurt.”

[soulhollow]

So I watched This Town for lack of anything with David Dawson in it lately, except I simply can't get DD's Alfred out of my head (not that I want to) so this show was... wild. Absolutely wild. (Particularly my headcanon of Alfred is that he doesn't cuss, as a rule, but if he does by heck but those in attendance ought to be ashamed for eliciting it.)

[ewanmitchellcrumbs]

Osferth NSFW Alphabet

A= Aftercare (what they’re like after the act)

Really good with the aftercare. Loves to cuddle and checks in to make sure his partner is okay. Will likely make them pray to assuage the religious guilt though.

B= Body part (favorite body part their own or their lovers)

He likes his hands - the duality of wielding a sword and praying is something Osferth enjoys, and having the privilege to explore his partner's body with them.

He likes his partner's eyes and hair. He loves staring into their eyes when he's buried inside of them and nuzzling into their hair and breathing in their scent when he's holding them close.

C= Cum (anything that has to do with it)

Will pull out and cum directly onto his partner's pussy rather than inside of it. Not the ideal way to prevent pregnancy, but this monk has long since broken his vow of celibacy.

D= Dirty secret (Pretty self explanatory)

The fact that Osferth has sex at all is a dirty secret. He's not supposed to. But he actively seeks it out and enjoys it.

E= Experience (do they know what they’re doing)

Yes, this man is as devoted to the skilled art of fucking as he is swordsmanship.

F= Favorite position

Any position where he can have his partner in his lap and stare up at them - loves the opportunity to watch them fall apart, but also be completely wrapped up in them.

G= Goofy (how serious are they)

Osferth will be a little shy and let slip the occasional nervous giggle, as he knows he's not really supposed to be doing this.

H= Hair (grooming habits)

Not very hairy, so no grooming necessary.

I= Intimacy (in the moment romantic or rough/dirty)

Prefers slow and romantic, but if he's pent up after a battle or pressed for time he will be very rough.

J= Jack off (do they masturbate and how often)

Never. It's a sin. If he's going to spill his seed he'd prefer to do it while being intimate and make the sin worth it.

K= Kink (kinks what they like possibly unusual)

Actually gets off on the religious guilt a little bit. Will put his cross around his partner's neck while they're riding him and be mesmerised by the way it looks moving between their tits.

L= Location (where they like to get it on)

Everywhere. His tent, his partner's tent, a dirty straw laden barn floor, a lumpy inn mattress. Osferth spends much of his time travelling, so beggars can't be choosers.

M= Motivation (things that makes them tick/turn ons)

Eye contact. Long, pretty hair. Lingering touches. Whispering in his ear.

N= No (turnoffs or absolutely won’t do)

Being publicly vulgar/crass, making it public knowledge that he's done the deed.

O= Oral (receiving or giving and how skillful they are)

Is quite shy about this, not opposed to it, but it will take some persuasion to get him to engage in either.

P= Pace (how fast they are and how long they last in bed)

Will take his time if he's bedded down for the evening. If there's a chance of getting caught then he's jackhammering.

Q= Quickie (do they prefer fast and hard)

Prefers soft and slow, but life on the road often means his only option is a fast and hard quickie.

R= Risk (do they like to try new things)

No, Osferth likes what he likes - he's sinned enough, his partner shouldn't push their luck.

S= Stamina (how many times they can go and how long each round lasts)

Osferth has very good stamina. He can last a while and can go at least twice before he runs out of steam.

T= Toys (are they game for using sex toys on themselves or lovers)

Absolutely not.

U= Unfair (how do they tease or do they enjoy suspense themselves)

He's not one to tease and gets extremely flustered if it's done to him.

V= Volume (are they loud, what sounds, and do they talk)

Is very quiet - expect the occasional gasp and barely audible panting.

W= Wild card (random sincannon of any sort)

Has fantasised about taking his partner while they read scripture and seeing how much they can get through without faltering.

X= X-ray (what’s down below in dem pants)

A really pretty cock - those baggy trousers are concealing a decent 7.5 inches - it's worth getting on your knees and praying to.

Y= Yearning (sexdrive level)

High, but he's shy about it.

Z= Zzzz (do they sleep after if so how quickly after)

Won't fall asleep for a while - likes to have time to decompress and process what's just happened.