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wheneclipsefalls · 1 year ago

Text

Withered

Beautiful Adult Neteyam photo by the wonderful @cinetrix

Pairing: Alpha Neteyam x Beta Fem Omatikaya Reader

Synopsis: You and Neteyam have opposite lives. He thrives in the daylight of possibilities while you are forced to the shadows. You are sure that the right course of action would be letting the future Olo'eyktan go. Neteyam is less convinced.

Based on a request from my 🥔 anon

Warnings: aged up characters, aged up neteyam, angst, health problems, explicit smut, dirty talk, crying, miscommunication, p in v, virgin reader, first time, omegaverse, alpha/beta relationship dynamic, heat, sickness, 18+ only MDNI

Tanhi: star/little star I Yawne: beloved I Sevin: pretty I Mawey: calm

A/N: I can't tell you all enough how grateful I am for the hype and many comments that have been around this story just from that small sneak peek I posted. This ended up being a lot longer than I ever anticipated but I had a blast writing it. Please let me know what you think. I love hearing from y'all!

For many the sun is a symbol of warmth, peace, and solace. The bright rays enwrap Na’vi of all ages in the glow of Eywa’s love. The rise of morning light represents a new day, another chance for adventure and possibilities. When the illuminating glow of yellow sunshine transforms into streaks of vibrant purples and pinks, it indicates a time for families to come together and tuck in for the night.

However, for you, your day truly begins at the first glow of bioluminescence. Eclipse is your time to explore the world.

You were born with an almost unheard of disease. It only took a few days of your infant body breaking out into abnormal rashes for Tsahik to realize something was wrong. Exposure of more than a few minutes to sunshine causes detrimental effects to your body. For this reason, you are forced to avoid the vibrant glow of the sun.

From that moment on you have lived your life almost nocturnally. On lucky days the clouds protect you from the harmful UV rays. Rain has come to be your favorite weather as it allows you an escape from your hut.

Despite these difficulties you have always strived to remain positive. You thank your parents for their gracious attitudes that inspire you to look for the silver lining in all situations. Sure you can not sunbathe or prowl the forest during sunny days but no one knows the forest at Eclipse as well as you do. Your knowledge has come in handy more than a few times, being asked to guide night hunts with some of the most notorious warriors in the clan.

This is where you met Neteyam.

The firstborn of the infamous Toruk Makto and your future Olo’eyktan, you originally assumed he would have no interest in interacting with you. You knew him from afar, hearing the word spread of his kindness and diligence when it came to helping those around him. His alpha status only served to bring a larger gaggle of girls practically falling at his feet. As a beta and suffering from a rare condition, you naturally took yourself out of the run up. You were confident he would choose some sweet and knowledgeable omega that would be the perfect tsahik.

However, your assumptions quickly crumbled as he progressively paid attention to you more and more throughout these night hunts. Instead of joining the rest of the alpha warriors gathering to share a strong drink after a successful kill, he would opt to check in with you. You were shy at first, unsure of how to act around such an influential member of the clan. However, there was something about those golden orbs and soft smile that quickly set you at ease.

You still remember the first time you had sustained a small injury during these hunts. It was nothing more than a shallow slash to your forearm, but Neteyam had insisted on carefully wrapping it himself. You gushed over him like an idiot, reminding him that it was unnecessary but he showed his stubborn side that day.

At first you thought it was your own overactive imagination noticing the frequency of night hunts he signed up for increase, but eventually it had become every single night. No matter how boned-tired he was from a day of full Olo’eyktan training, he would beam at the sight of your small form. His scent was something that seemed to constantly enrapture your senses. The heavy essence of pine and hormonal swings was so much stronger than yours. It took some getting used to. The first few nights you were bashful to come home and find evidence of your arousal dampening your loincloth.

Still, you told yourself it was just a simple crush that you had to live with. It took weeks for you to even consider the possibility of Neteyam showing interest in you. He had been consistent in bringing you out of your shell, getting you to talk about everything from your family to the fondest hope and dreams in your heart. Oftentimes he would stay back behind after the hunt to help you join him sitting on an overarching thick branch (you were grateful for the darkness of eclipse that hid your blush each time he effortlessly hoisted you up with large hands gently holding your waist) and chat away into the night.

It was only when the gifts began that you gave these interactions a second thought. It had started small with simple flowers and fruits he had encountered throughout the day. However, they slowly became more intricate. The first time he brought you a small woven bracelet of sparkling gems, you had been gobsmacked.

“Like the night sky. The only thing appropriate for my tanhi.” He had said, making you almost choke on your own spit. Tahni- little star: a nickname he had coined for you after the first week. A fitting term for someone that only knew the night sky. Still, it was the first time he had ever called you his. The terminology was not lost on you.

When the sun arose once more and you had retired back to your protected hut, those words had kept you up, your small fingers twiddling with the bracelet.

Taking your acceptance of the small gift, Neteyam had become even more bold with his courting. Before you knew it he was bringing a meal with him for you before every hunt. You had tried to decline the thoughtful gesture but he would not take no for an answer.

“Someone has to make sure you eat, tanhi.”

There was no fighting the alpha on this, so you graciously took the meals each night. He smiled proudly as you moaned in satisfaction of the carefully seasoned meat he had killed and prepared for you. Another testament to the mighty warrior and beneficial mate he is.

You started to think that the eldest Sully was simply a flirt, or perhaps such a kind person that his actions came off as romantic. However, there was one instance that finally tipped you to accepting his affections. It was a particularly successful hunt, dragging home a thanator, when he had slowed down to your pace. Talking about anything and everything under the night sky, your breath was practically stolen from your lungs when he reached out to tuck a strand of your dark hair behind your ear.

However innocent the gesture was, it was the lingering of his hand running down your neck that caused your heart to bash against your rib cage violently. A simple brush that had left his scent to coalesce with yours. An essence that would keep other suitors away. Out of habit, you mentally went to play it off as a simple accident, but the crooked smirk plastered across his face did not allow you. There was a primal satisfaction seated in those golden orbs, one that caused a pool of arousal to gather in your core.

He knew what he had done.

Neteyam was proud of it.

His affection was untethered from that point forward. Accidental brushes of fingers had turned into blatant hand holding. The alpha never missed an opportunity to press a warm hand to the small of your back, guiding you through the terrain, or wrap an arm around your waist in order to steady you when walking over uneven forest floor.

“What kind of alpha would I be if I let you get hurt?”

He had spoken in response to your inquiry, a cheeky grin plastered across his face.

Falling for Neteyam was easy. Too easy. It was keeping yourself back from jumping into his arms or melting into his embraces that was difficult. No matter how strange and suggestive his behavior had been, you didn’t want to get your hopes up. After all, there was no saying what he got up to during the day. For all you knew he could be taking omegas out every day and weaving sweet gifts for them too.

So you had decided to do what was best for everyone and take yourself out of the situation before something embarrassing could happen. You declined the request to accompany the hunting party and instead went to spend some more time with your family. If your parents noticed the difference in your appearance they did not show it. They were always good at giving you space, respecting your independence as an adult (although your mother did go out of her way to place a comforting hand on your shoulder, a silent way to express her understanding and love). Neither of them knew about Neteyam at the time, it was easier that way.

This fact only heightened their surprise when they saw Toruk Makto’s eldest son approaching their small gathering. You can still remember the intent gaze that Neteyam pierced you with. Your heart hammered out of your chest, hands fidgeting with the moss beneath you nervously. Neteyam signaled the traditional greeting to your parents before respectfully asking your father if he could borrow you for a moment.

They were caught off guard, your dad turning back to send you a curious look, but naturally neither wanted to decline the Omatikaya prince.

Once the two of you were finally alone, Neteyam immediately sprang into action. He grabbed your biceps and used that hold to turn you from side to side as he scanned your form. His intense inspection had blood rushing to your cheeks.

“Neteyam, what are you doing? I thou-”

“Where are you injured?” You twitched when he reached a hand out to inspect your flicking tail too. Confusion swarmed within you. You had sputtered and struggled to put together a full sentence.

“It has been three days, Tanhi. I blew one day off as exhaustion or a fluke and the second as pure coincidence but surely only an injury would keep you away from the hunt for three days.” His eyes finally met yours again when there was no wound to be found. His tall frame had towered over yours as he reached out to cup your cheek.

That familiar warmth and adoration you had for him had returned within an instant.

You stepped back, successfully out of his grasp.

“I’m fine.” You replied simply.

His tail swatted in the humid air and those golden orbs had squinted into slits. The focused attention of that look full of suspicion was enough to hold you down to your spot. You swallowed the lump in your throat and as you tried desperately to keep the fidgeting at bay. It was one of the few times you were grateful to be beta because surely an omega would shrivel under the pressure of his looming presence.

“I don’t like when you lie to me, Tahni. Now tell me why I’ve had to go without my little star for three whole days.” Neteyam placed his hands sternly upon his hips, ears twitching forward as if preparing to take in your explanation. An explanation that you felt could not be shared. Doing so was bound to undermine your plans, completely destroying the efforts that had been made.

“The group seems to be more than sufficient without my guidance.” You don’t dare to meet his eyes, your own orbs trained at the ground instead. In a moment’s notice his sculpted body was once again inches away from yours. His warmth came off of him in waves, along with the heady aura of alpha pheromones.

You couldn’t hold back the shiver that ran down your spine when he placed heavy hands on your shoulders and bent over your frame till you could feel his calm breath against your ear. Neteyam’s tail wrapped around your thigh. A part of your brain told you to run, understanding the alluring danger that awaited you, while the other yearned to curl up against his impressive physique.

You couldn’t understand how any omega managed to be around this male without completely dropping to their knees.

Suddenly you had some sympathy for the girls that had always fawned over him.

“Tell me the truth, sevin.” The heated words tickled at your ears and made your heart skip a beat. It was foolish to think that there was any chance of lying to Neteyam, the mighty warrior that walked with the confidence of the supernatural.

So you did.

You had scrambled to messily explain how it would be best if the two of you spent less time together. Unfortunately this unrehearsed synopsis included an approach that painted yourself as the foolish beta with a crush on the Omatikaya prince and therefore unable to handle herself around him. It was not the perspective you had hoped for, but it was the only one that could have been presented in your state of jumbled thought.

Neteyam shook his head, an almost fond smile upon his lips.

“Tanhi, you really do not like to make things easy for me.” A bitter laugh escaped his throat. The sound put you slightly on edge but there was no trace of anger in his expression. Amusement was easily perceivable in the raise of his hairless eyebrows. He had taken your humiliating and pathetic explanation in stride, in fact, he had found humor in it.

“I thought I’ve made myself clear.” You were swooped into the encirclement of his arms in one quick motion. You squeaked and braced yourself against the warm muscles of his abdomen. “You are the mate I seek.”

His words had thrown you into a spiral, your heartstrings plucking into rhythms of heightened emotion. It was almost too much to take in. A part of you still found security in denying these bold claims but there had been too much evidence at that point. Neteyam Sully had in fact been courting you.

His head lowered, nuzzling at your face until you finally looked up at him. Your lips were only a breath apart.

“If you’ll have me.” Neteyam whispered.

There was no fighting the longings of your heart at that rate. That night you had agreed to his courting and within a month the two of you had been madly in love and preparing to officially mate.

The process was faster, seemingly faster than anything else in your life. Night had always slowed you down from progressing in the normal rhythm of Na’vi milestones, but Neteyam had broken that pattern for you.

You can still remember the vivid sensation of his tendrils connecting with your own. Those sparks of electricity that had created a direct line to his innermost feelings and thoughts. There was great solace to be found in the surging feelings of love and adoration he had for you, something you had been able to tap into. Still, nothing could ever compare with the way you felt for Neteyam.

He’s your world. Your light. Your sun.

Being with him feels like finally having a taste of those golden rays. You can see it in his smile. In the shake of his shoulders when his laughter trickles from soft lips. In the unashamed sparkle that overtakes his eyes in a coating whenever they land on you after a long day of training.

Neteyam has become your world in only a matter of a few months. It is hard to imagine how you went so many years without this unbreakable connection between the two of you. Each night you wake up to the warm embrace of your mate who has come home from a long day of training. Soft kisses are placed along your eyelids, cheeks, and nose until your thick lashes flutter and you regain consciousness.

The searing envious looks of other females can be felt at your back when the two of you join the rest of the clan for dinner each night, but it is only white noise in the presence of your handsome mate guiding you with a hand to the small of your back. In fact it becomes less than a passing memory when Neteyam goes on to share the events of the day in great detail, usually pulling out a tucked away gift he has found for you along the trails of his adventures.

There is so much hidden beneath that emanating exterior of perfection that Neteyam upholds. He strips away those layers only for you, usually among the flowering meadow the two of you lay in while stargazing. The stories often end with your mate trailing off into a groggy murmur until the air fills with the sounds of his sleeping breaths. You prefer to stay tucked against him for a while longer, letting the moment last before you must wake him and shoo the mighty warrior back home for some much needed rest.

While he sleeps you venture from the hut to forage and hunt, although Neteyam prefers to accompany you during dangerous hunts. You decide that what he doesn’t know can’t hurt him. He is known to be an overprotective alpha anyway. Once food has been secured and your adventures have come to a close, you slip back into the darkened hut before the first break of dawn. Those specially made thick curtains are the difference between life and death for you.

Although the tent has been sufficient for years, Neteyam continues to add to its layers. He is constantly worrying about the vulnerabilities of the hut, convinced that one slip could bring catastrophic consequences to his mate. So he works with his father to constantly rebuild and strengthen the exterior walls. There are times where you remind him of how unnecessary these actions are but Neteyam is undeterred by these conversations. So you let your mate continue his projects. If it brings him peace of mind to obsess over the structure then it must be doing some good.

Things are great for the first month. Nothing sexual occurs during those first few weeks of being newly mated, out of respect to you. There is no denying that Neteyam has had experience in the ways of pleasuring females but you on the other hand have never been close to intimate with someone else. As a couple you decide to take things slow. However, you can not help but admire the restraint Neteyam shows when you catch the shift of his pheromones into that of lust or see the tightness of his loincloth after a particularly long make out session.

Were it any other alpha you are sure that the time would have come for him to become impatient and work towards persuading you to go further with him. However, Neteyam knows that you are shy and nervous. He puts your needs before his own and constantly assures you that he is happy to wait so long as you feel comfortable when the time is right.

Your apprehension has slowly been melting away. The soft caresses that travel along your form sends a burning thrill that is exotic to you. Moments where you are brave enough to straddle his lap while kissing, the friction of his groin against your core is electric. These new feelings have been quickly festering and building inside of you. The nerves have slowly morphed into alluring curiosity. It has been becoming harder to hold back.

For this reason, you’ve decided to tell Neteyam tonight that you are ready. Finally, the bond created through tsaheylu will be strengthened and confirmed by the intertwining of each other’s bodies.

The last hints of sunshine have disappeared behind the moon. This time you wake before Neteyam has a chance to come wake you up himself. The nerves that bundle into a coil in your stomach have kept you from sleeping in so you decide to seek him out yourself. It shouldn’t be long till he is back from an exhibition with Jake.

The village is lively with reuniting families after a prosperous day of duties. It's a familiar sight that has always brought a warmth to your heart, especially that of small children running to their mothers or fathers with grabby hands. There are times where you imagine sending your own child to wobble excitedly towards Neteyam, spun through the air by the mighty warrior that you are lucky enough to call your mate.

High in the trees, hidden by the walls of a family hut you hear the familiar voice of Lo’ak. A smile tugs at your lips, confident that Neteyam is sure to be with his brother. However, that excitement is dampened slightly when the responding voice is not your mate’s but Unip’s.

“I just don’t know how long he thinks this can go on.” Unip sighs.

“Well you know how Neteyam is. He will find a way to succeed and if not, he will die trying.” Lo’ak snorts, but there is a hint of concern in his nonchalant tone. It’s a timber that makes you halt in your tracks and ears twitch to hear the conversation.

“It’s only going to get worse, you know. Once he is Olo’eyktan, half a night’s rest will not be enough anymore. He already looks half dead.”

There is a silence that follows, only filled by the sound of your own heart thumping.

“You’re never going to convince him otherwise, bro.” Lo’ak responds, amused tone faltering greatly.

Stepping forward, you curve yourself around a thick tree trunk in effort to discreetly get a better look at the pair. Lo’ak’s back is facing towards you but even from this low vantage point, the lines of his tense muscle are easy to spot. Your golden eyes have become specialized for seeing in the dark after all these years, allowing a better image of his form and mannerisms. You are used to reading people’s expressions and body language with only the dim glow of eclipse.

“Stubborn skxawng.” Unip shakes his head before leaning against the sturdy trunk. His scowl is illuminated by the soft red glow of a patch of sprouting flowers. The sight makes your stomach twist.

Have things truly gotten this bad?

“Neteyam won’t leave her. You and I both know that. All that can be done is make peace with it.” Lo’ak shrugs his shoulders.

“And watch him turn into an old man in a few years. Those bags are sure to be bad for his pretty boy appearance.” Unip quips back, causing both the males to break out into laughter.

The tension visibly eases between them but you are not laughing. In fact, you can feel the beginning of those twisting nerves pushing bile up your throat. All joyful anticipation has washed from your features, replaced with dread and horror.

Your feet drum against the forest floor, stuck on autopilot and effectively taking you home. The beginning of streaming tears threaten to drop past your eyes.

It’s true that Neteyam has been tired but it isn’t till now that you reply back your interactions and his recent appearance. Those dark circles aren’t as prevalent in the light of eclipse, perhaps they are more telling in daylight. Neteyam has a way of falling asleep in a matter of seconds once hitting the mat but you have always assumed that to be a part of his nature. Some people are naturally deep sleepers.

However, now, all of these signs appear in a different light for you. Each conversation is played back in your head but of course Neteyam has never let his weaknesses show, especially ones that could be brought on by you. You know this and yet it is only now that you scold yourself for not being more perceptive, for not seeking advice and perspective from those around him.

His family and friends have an advantage that you can not achieve. Surely they would be the first to notice his changes in demeanor and health. They are the ones watching him work, train, and interact more closely with clan members. You have never been more envious of those walking in the sun in your entire life. This condition has always been a hassle for you but now it has turned into true heartache.

This weakness that Eywa has given you is no longer just affecting you but now your perfect mate. This disease has spread to him in a way you scold yourself for not anticipating.

How is he supposed to become Olo’eyktan, protecting and guiding the People all while being tethered to you?

Eywa has destined your life to be forever restricted to the shadows, but that is not Neteyam’s path.

You can spot the familiar dark canvases of your hut in the trees up ahead. No doubt Neteyam has already returned home at this point, if not then he will soon. Less than an hour earlier you were ecstatic to see him but now the thought of seeing those tired eyes makes you want to curl up into a ball.

Needing more time to process, you opt to take a different route, one that leads to a secluded waterfall. Safe in the greenery and now sitting in the shallow area of the glowing water, you take a moment to breathe. Water trickles into a soothing pattern that has been associated with your memories in this found sanctuary.

Truly, none of this should be a surprise. This ailment has been the driving course of your life thus far and you’ve grown used to it, letting go of certain aspects that are not meant for you. Neteyam is just another one of those. He is beyond your reach. Keeping him here would only hurt the clan. They need a leader that can be with them, present both physically and mentally. For the greater good it is time to let him become that Olo’eyktan.

Perhaps you would have accepted this fact and stuck to it earlier on were it not for the great love you hold for him. Neteyam Sully holds your heart and soul effortlessly in his hands. There will never be another that lights up your life the same way he does and truth be told, you don’t want there to be. Forever your first and only love.

Regardless, the time for being selfish is over.

Some Na’vi have the honor of dying a warrior’s death, going down in the name of protecting the People. Others sacrifice their time and energy serving the clan daily in the name of Eywa. You have been kept back from either of these duties so it makes sense that giving up the future Olo’eyktan would be your contribution.

After all, how are you supposed to serve as Tsahik with your limitations?

This makes sense. Your brian tells you this is the logical solution. Life will go on. You will return back to a life that you have come to be content with over the years and Neteyam will find a proper mate that can serve The People by his side.

Still, it is impossible to ignore the cracks that are slowly developing in your heart. It is difficult to imagine a life without your true love. The thought alone has a sob crawling up your throat. This sound however is morphed into a strange shriek when a pair of muscular arms suddenly grasp and pull you back against a hard chest.

The water splashes around the two of you and you can feel the rumble of Neteyam’s laughter as you are awkwardly shifted in his arms.

“Baby girl, you are really off your game today.” He teases fondly before nuzzling his face into the curve of your neck. An efficient shuffle has you more familiarly settled between the corded muscle of his toned thighs. Instinctually you lean back against him.

“What? Nothing to say in your defense?”

“Oh yeah uh just tired.” You lamely respond.

“Silly Tanhi, today has barely begun.”

For you.

The day has barely begun for you and only you. Every other Na’vi enjoy the blissful alignment of the sun and their ‘days’. You are the outlier.

Gathering up your courage you finally lift yourself onto your knees and turn to face him. Neteyam grins, but for once you aren’t focused on the gleams of those pearly teeth. Sure enough there are dark circles in a crescent shape beneath his eyes. You reach out to thumb at those dark contrasts. The alpha blissfully misreads this as cupping his cheek. He leans into the touch and his smile broadens.

“My sweet sevin.” He mumbles. Your stomach tightens back into that knot. Finally, he seems to notice the shift in your demeanor. The smile falters and he places his hand over the one cupping his cheek. The large veined hand completely covers yours.

“What’s wrong?”

It seems an impossible task to go through with what you know must be done. A part of you considers holding off, letting it last a little longer before you lose him forever. However, that would only result in a more sleep deprived Omatikaya Prince and the suffering of future Olo’eyktan.

The longer you take to respond the faster the amusement in those golden orbs declines. He calls your name softly and turns his head to gently peck your palm.

“I just-” You steady yourself. The words feel like acid crawling up your throat and sitting pressed against him only makes it burn more. Cautiously you detach yourself completely and settle down on the colorful rocks lining the shallow river.

Neteyam immediately stiffens. His tail curls up into high alert and his ears twitch back slightly, but still you can see the now fake smile plastered on his face.

“You’re…tired.” It’s a weak start but they are the only words you can force out.

There is a flicker of surprise in his features but it melts away into a mocking eye roll. The corners of his lips are back to being turned up in a more genuine manner.

“Well of course I’m a little tired Tanhi. Every mighty warrior should be if he’s done his job right.” The alpha chuckles and you can almost taste the deviation of his pheromones. He confidently reaches out to take your hand in his. “But never too tired to spend time with my sweet little star.”

The cool rush of water is a dramatic contrast to the warm grasp Neteyam has on your hand. It feels like fire that curls up your veins and pushes tears to the back of your eyes. It’s too painful to be close like this. To see him obliviously flirt and cuddle as if all is well when you know deep down that this will be the last time you feel his touch.

“No, I mean exhausted. Ma Neteyam-” You shut your mouth tight. That phrase was so easily in your arsenal of vocabulary but it’s time to start training yourself to stop using it. You brush the circles under his eyes again. “You haven’t been getting enough sleep.”

Realization seems to dawn for him.

“Oh you mean my eyes. Lo’ak was teasing me earlier about it. Didn’t think it would bother you so much, sevin, but I’m sure my grandmother has some herbs to lighten the color.” He laughs lightly.

“No, Neteyam. This is bad for you. Staying up every night only to push yourself to the limit the next day. Living in that darkened hut. Spending every last fiber of energy you have spending time with me. Taking care of me-”

“That is what mates do, Tanhi. I don’t want it any other way-”

“I am bad for you!”

The words cut through the air and suddenly every remnant of the playful atmosphere has disappeared.

“Don’t say stuff like that, Tanhi.” His voice is firm, stern enough to be considered reprimanding. Neteyam eyes darken onto a duller glow. The musky scent of your mate shifts into that of a stronger presence. It’s moments like that that you remember how distinct his second gender is.

“Neteyam, you know I’m right. This condition is no longer just hurting me but you too. Playing this game of back and forth makes no sense.”

He sits up straight, back stiff as a rod. It takes everything in you to hold that gaze without bursting into tears and backing down. The flicker of his tail has turned into frantic swatting as his lips curl downwards.

“What are you trying to say, love?”

You gulp and prepare yourself to utter words that weigh heavy in your heart.

“We have to end this.”

Silence drags on. The rush of running water and purring wildlife is the only thing that fills the air. Your tail swishes nervously in the water, causing a slight splash. No matter which way you squint or tilt your head, Neteyam’s expression is unreadable. Even your enhanced night vision is not enough to fully understand or anticipate the brewing emotions beneath those golden eyes.

“No.”

Your mind sputters to a halt at the snipped response. He’s giving you nothing to work with.

“Neteya-”

“Where is all of this coming from, yawne?” He reaches forward to cup your cheek but you stand up before he can. This close proximity is becoming too much. Perhaps it’s cowardly, but you need a reprieve from his love-filled gaze and tender touches. Otherwise, there is no way you will be able to do what needs to be done. You wonder if he knows this as you are met with a toned chest at eye level blocking your path.

“Did something happen?”

“No.”

“Then why are you so worried all of a sudden?” He pleads for an answer but you have finally managed to slip past him and wade out of the water. The drum of your feet rings in your ears, taking you to Eywa knows where. Neteyam is hot on your heels.

“It’s not just worry, it’s logic, Neteyam. Can’t you see? You are going to be Olo’eyktan. The People need a leader that won’t be tied to some nocturnal Na’vi that drains the last bit of energy you have left.”

The alpha goes to interject but the words are flying out of your mouth at such a speed at this rate, he has no opportunity.

“They will need a Tsahik that can do more than just work a night shift. Not to mention one that actually understand healing protocal-”

“My grandmother has already offered to teach you.” He counters, stomping feet practically nipping at your heels. It’s not that you mean to walk away from him, but the dam that holds your suffocating emotions at bay is starting to crack and crumble. One look at him could weaken your resolve. This has to be done fast, ripped off like an adhesive bandage.

“You deserve to be with someone that can lead The People with you. A mate that can serve both you and the clan in a way I never can. An omega that is a proper mate.”

A strong hand clamps around your bicep and spins you around. Neteyam glowers down at you with an intensity that is borderline desperate. The tears are starting to leave a glaze over your eyes, even as you avoid his own at any cost.

“You are my mate. You are the woman that I choose to spend the rest of my days with.” He tries to gently tilt your face towards him by grabbing your chin, but you flick it off. “We are mated before Eywa.” The crack in his voice tears at your heart.

“I shouldn’t have let it go on this long, I’m sorry. I foolishly let myself believe that you and I are meant to be but now it is clear that my head was simply in the clouds.” A sob thickens your voice until it is barely tangible. Words are failing you and you idly wonder how many more you will truly be able to manage in this state.

You attempt to flee from his embrace once more, just a moment to escape that heartbreaking stare that follows your every move. Neteyam holds you gently by the biceps but there is enough force there to keep you in place.

“We are, Tahni. All these other obstacles are just that, obstacles. Things we can overcome.” He slumps down, determined to finally have your eyes meet his. The curtain of your flowing hair is a weak shield against these efforts. You can feel the heat of his escalating breath tickle at your cheeks. He swoops in closer slowly, with the caution of closing in on a skittish prey. “It’s just you and me, little star.”

The flat of his nose finally rests against yours, lips only a sudden movement away.

There are promises of familiar comfort and happiness in this intimate position. Your nature keens towards his gentle touch. It prompts you to hide away every other concern, worried that it could break this moment of tranquility.

However, that is exactly what you do.

“You have to break it.”

There is a pause, a moment of shock that you take advantage of. Slipping out his hold, you watch realization slink across his features. It’s blood chilling, the look of horror that is clearly evident upon his handsome face. It’s a rare thing to render Neteyam speechless. He has grown up learning how to lead and command a room with confidence and grace. Seeing him now, mouth agape as his thoughts lag, it’s easier to see that there is simply a normal man behind the mighty warrior.

A male that you have managed to strip away the light in his eyes, all evidence of excitement lost.

It is now that you can truly see the aching restlessness and lost nights of sleep in his demeanor. He wilts before you.

“You don’t mean that.” He insists, voice now hollow of its usual domineering confidence.

“I do.” The timber of your voice shivers and shakes, doing nothing to strengthen your resolve. Still, the lost look that Neteyam sends you absolutely wrenches at your heart. “It’s what’s best for everyone.”

Words that are meant to reassure him at least slightly only make his tail halt movement, obvious that the phrase only digs the dagger deeper into his chest.

“Everyone?” He whispers, hairless eyebrows drawing together. Hesitant steps lead you backwards, eager to begin your journey away from this tornado of darkened emotions. Away from the raincloud you have created between the two of you. “You…this is what you want?”

Want.

That small word is a palpable distinction. To change this argument from what needs to be done to the inner workings of your desires and dreams. To veer it towards the ever flowing river of devotion and love you know will always be in your heart for him. It’s the one move that leaves you completely defenseless.

This is the last thing that you want.

He has to know that. He must know that. And perhaps that is why he faces you with this question head on, forcing you to say the words out loud. It’s a towering wall that you have no hopes of climbing. Lying is not your strong suit. Neteyam knows that.

“Please Neteyam.” You send your final plea before turning on your heel and bolting. Vanishing into the trees before he has a second to form one syllable.

Lying isn’t your strength, but hiding is something you are familiar with.

“She’ll probably cool down.” Lo’ak reassures him, handing a leaf with larvae to Neteyam.

“What did I do wrong?” Neteyam wonders out loud. It’s difficult for Lo’ak to tell whether or not that question is rhetorical. The eldest Sully’s eyes are focused on the horizon, he’s lost. Off somewhere else.

“Nothing, bro! Not everything is that simple.”

Out of the corner of his eye, Neteyam sees the wooden cup of strong drink pushed toward him but he declines. Drinking is the last thing he needs right now, although it is tempting. These past two days have been pure torture and sorrow. Washing every clouding thought away with the swig of fermented fruit would surely keep his mind off of you for a while, but it would never stop the permanent ache in his chest.

Although Neteyam knows he must look awful because even his father encourages him to drink, despite the duties he is set to carry out the next day. Most nights he is advised to keep his wits about him, but Jake has let up since the event.

“There has to be something I could’ve said. Perhaps something I can say now.”

“Bro, you’ve already said more than enough. If your constant notes and begging haven’t got her to let you into the hut, I don’t think words are the problem here.” A grimace is etched into Lo’ak’s features but Neteyam turns away from the sight. He can’t handle the look of pity that his family seems to constantly be shooting him.

He looks miserable. He is miserable. Every Na’vi with eyes can see that much. However, he doesn’t want sympathy. He needs solutions. A plan that will set things right again. Anything to bring his littler start back into his arms.

“Ma Teyam,” Neteyiri gently coos, haunching forward to tuck on the tangled braids behind his ear. “Perhaps it is time to give her some space.”

Usually his mother’s presence has the power to soothe away the worst of his worries, but today all he can do is sigh at her words. Sitting in problems has never been his strong suit. Neteyam is used to problem solving. Coming up with a strategy and executing it until the issue is nothing but a distant memory. He prays to Eywa that this too will become just that. Something that can be laughed at down the road.

However, sitting here now surrounded by people and never feeling more lonely, it’s hard to imagine ever laughing at such a thing.

Neteyam continues to pick at the grass next to the untouched meal. The sun has been down for over an hour now. Dinner is wrapping up and there is still no sight of you…again. Every crunch of a leaf or flitter of voices has him turning to search for your small frame in the darkness. It’s an effort that leaves him empty handed every time but, no matter the frequency of failure he can’t stop himself from whipping his head around anyway.

“You know, there was a time that I was upset with your father. Livid, actually. And yet here we are today.” Neytiri almost purrs, trying to comfort her son.

“Yeah and did he wait around and give you space?” The words come out harsher than intended but Neytiri doesn’t tell him off like usual. Instead her ears pin back and she runs a thumb across his cheek. Jake and Neytiri lock eyes from across the fire, a silent communication that has Jake clearing his throat.

“I’m not sure if I’m the prime example in this scenario, kid.” A deep chuckle accentuates Jake’s words. He goes to close his mouth and leave it at that but his mate sends him one fierce look that lets him know he is far from done comforting their eldest. “I mean uh truth be told, I was an absolute knucklehead before I met your mother.”

“Still are.” She corrects him.

Jake doesn’t try to fight against the claim, but he does nervously clasp the back of his neck, searching for the right words to say.

“Tanhi still hasn’t eaten. Must go.” Neteyam abruptly calls, on his feet within a heartbeat. He gently cradles his untouched meal in the palm of his hand as he navigates his way out of the circle of his family. Neytiri sighs and Jake sends her an apologetic look as they watch their son slither off into the night once again.

Even Tuk sends sad eyes in the direction of her older brother as he walks away.

Upon reaching the dark curtains of your hut, Neteyam is unsure whether or not you still reside inside. There is no sign of light emanating inwards. For a moment he is convinced that you have slipped out during his absence, but then there is a ruffle of covers that his ears manage to pick up. Stalking forward carefully, he leans in to pick up on every sound possible.

Even with his alpha hearing, there is little to no noise coming from the hut. Or at least no sound that is useful to him in any way. He wonders what you are up to within those darkened walls. His hindbrain urges him to go inside and find out for himself, cradle you in his arms till there are promises of never leaving again. However, he knows better than that.

Neteyam waits to be invited in.

“Tanhi?” The sound echoes through the night air, but no response comes. With a sigh he kneels down by the entrance, cautiously pushing the leaf underneath the thick rim of fabric.

“You missed dinner again.” Neteyam knows he shouldn’t expect a response at this point, but his tail still naturally droops to the floor when one doesn’t come. “I brought some for you.”

He waits once more, but silence hangs heavy in the air. Neteyam’s ears twitch to focus in on the minute sounds again. The shallow breathing is confirmation enough of your presence. A part of him almost wishes that he is talking to a blank piece of fabric. If you had left then he could have at least spent that anxious energy scouring the forest for your slim frame. If you had left it would give him hope that you’ve hunted, eaten, gone on a walk. Anything that isn’t sitting in your hut.

“Do me a favor, baby. Please eat something. Maybe you have been when I’m not breathing down your neck,” He gives a humorless laugh. “But…I just want to make sure you’re healthy. I’m starting to get worried.”

When the silence continues he doesn’t leave immediately. The weight of the stress and heartache is tangible. He can feel it in his bones. He can sense it when in the lag of his maneuvers and movements during flight in his training. Truth be told, Neteyam is sure that it’s visible to others, shining through in his trudging walk to and fro.

Sitting here in the grass, the same place he had spent that first night you started icing him out, he can feel the weight of sleep pulling him downwards. The muscles of his body scream in protest at every movement. Physically his body is ready to give way, but his hindbrain weaves together signs of distress all night long.

His instincts yearn to be close to you again, close to his mate who he shares a special connection with that nothing can replace. At times it is painful, that bond between the two of you. Neteyam remembers many days where that connection has been physically fortified by your time together, binding tighter with every brush of his fingers along your skin. However, he did not anticipate the effects of the opposite reaction.

Going to sleep alone and cold, leaves a heavy weight on his chest. At times it feels almost suffocating. Sleeping outside of your hut doesn’t erase these pains, but it does dull them slightly. He wonders if you’ve ever stepped over him during his slumber. Actively trying to or not, his senses remain on high alert throughout the night. He can wake at the drop of a leaf, false hope that it may be your small form finally stepping past those heavy curtains.

“Neteyam.” His head whips around at the voice, but it isn’t your honey timber that flits through his ears. Instead it comes from behind him, where Kiri stands with her hands woven together in front of her.

“What’s wrong?”

Not bothering to answer, she instead motions for him to follow her. He glances back at the entrance of your hut, but one look at Kiri’s down turned lips has him groggily shifting back onto his feet. She doesn’t speak till the two of them are out of ear shot.

“Mom and Dad sent you?” Neteyam guesses, tail already drooping between his legs. It bothers him that his parents are rushing to bandage things up, treating him like a child. Advice is appreciated at the best of times, but this is his life. He is an adult, and has been for years now. The rift that has been fortified between you two is his problem to solve and therefore his choice on how to fix it.

“No, just thought I would save you from making a fool of yourself.” She continues to effortlessly lead him away from the hut.

“I’m just dropping some food off.”

“I know.” There is no hint of mocking or disbelief in her tone. She simply grabs his hand gently and guides him back along the path home. Neteyam braces himself for a spew of advice but it never comes. Kiri to his surprise is silent, no hint of tension lingering between them. Still, he knows what message is being conveyed. No matter how much it hurts, he can’t continue to barricade your front door.

It’s moments like these that Neteyam comes to truly admire how much his younger sister has grown up. She prances through the forest with a humble confidence. Each step taken with the certainty of belonging. Kiri no longer needs others to tell her who she is. Similarly she feels no need to press her opinions on her older brother. She waits patiently. As if she knows that he will come to her when the time is right.

It is a quality he looks upon with great fondness and gratitude.

Life has thrown you more obstacles than you care to count. This condition has been a stumbling block your entire life, but you refuse to let it keep you from the finishing line. You consider yourself a persevering person, one that is not easily taken down. When things get difficult you have always been taught to gather your bearings and get to work. Some sacrifices are painful but meant to be left behind if they are keeping you from fulfilling a happy and purposeful life.

So for the first few days, you try to get back into your normal routine. The first night was spent weaving baskets together through the blurred vision of your tears. The basket came out looking like it had been mauled by a Palulukan. Regardless you continued to attempt getting back into your old routine, however those were usually filled with night hunts, an activity you were terrified of seeing Neteyam at. So you declined.

However, truth be told, it only takes twenty four hours to realize that this heartbreak is intruding upon everything you do. You open your eyes as sunset turns to Eclipse and the first thing that surfaces is the dread at needing to go to communal dinner. So, you push dinner off. Neteyam is persistent in bringing you a plate each night, usually saying a few apologies and begging once again for you to come out.

Your lips are raw and sore from biting into them in order to keep sobs at bay every time he comes to visit. Those first few nights he spent laying outside your hut was an awful mixture of longing and agony. His potent essence was easily carried through the night wind, constantly bringing it to your senses. You had twisted in the thin blankets on your hammock to stop yourself from going out there and cuddling next to him.

On the third night, he doesn’t stay.

You expect to feel relieved when he silently sets the serving of food down and leaves.

And yet, there is a part of you that longs for the draw of his smooth voice, no matter how distraught and rough it has become over the past few days. A part of you seems to also intrinsically sense his presence, even in the midst of slumber. Now that he spends his nights away from your hut, the emotional turmoil has become too much to handle.

Simple tasks pose as daunting accomplishments, ones that already feel like impending defeat. So, you slowly start losing those habits too. Your eyes run out of tears to shed so instead you spend more than a reasonable amount of time pondering on your life. You consider what it is that brought you to these circumstances, questioning whether or not you were the one to blame for this heartbreak. Perhaps, you were the one easily swayed into promises of fairy tales.

Before you know it a whole week has passed and you haven’t stepped foot outside. Recognizing this fact makes you feel pathetic and helpless, something that you don’t take a liking to. So, with red rimmed eyes and a congested nose, you take up a new purpose. Wielding together weapons from the materials in your hut.

Although they’re nothing to gawk at, the finished results are enough to convince yourself that you are contributing to the welfare of the clan. The steps are repetitive and allow your thoughts to wander while doing so. By the second week you have donated a fair amount to the hunting parties without having to leave your home, thanks to the kindness of your mother.

Your parents drop in frequently, but it’s obvious that they too find these visits painful. It’s an emotional ball and chain to see you wither away into something different. Visits that used to be full of vibrant laughter and storytelling now consist mostly of their own updates and pleas for you to come outside. Each time you assure them that you will…soon.

It’s not a lie, at least not to you.

Despite the physical ache of your heart every time you think of Neteyam’s smiling face and the bond that is now nothing but dust between you, there is still hope in your heart. A hope that someday you will recover from these lovesick feelings and finally be able to look upon the Omatikaya prince as any other clan member would. Purpose will return to your everyday tasks and Neteyam will only reside in your mind as Olo’eyktan of the Omatikaya.

Still, you would be naive to ignore the weighted awareness of his presence that consumes you every time he comes to drop meals off. You can sense him before his footsteps are even audible. Occasionally, he will say a few encouraging words or promises of solution but some nights he simply places the food there and stares at it sadly before disappearing once more. Both instances strangle your heart in their grasp.

You thought that his scent would lessen once the bond was broken, but you figure it is alpha status to thank for always sending his essence of fresh pine through your hut at each visit. In some ways it feels like the only full breaths you took. The woven walls still allow air in, but only breezes warped with his scent remind you of being outside.

It’s on the two week mark that there is a shift in the miserable routine. No meal is brought to the entryway. Hours go by and Neteyam never comes by. You’ve been living off of those nightly meals and while one meal is not hardly enough to maintain a status of full health, its loss is even worse. At first, it appears that Neteyam has given up. He is tired of chasing after you and rightfully so you suppose. This is meant to be a step in the right direction, but you cry yourself to sleep that night. Apparently, your body had an extra storage of tears after all.

However, when it happens again, your theories start to change. A small slice of fruit is left outside on a leaf by the curtains in place of a meal. It’s delicious with juice squirting along your tongue in a dramatic symphony of taste. It’s the type of experience that leaves one wanting for more. Initially you are disappointed when the small piece is gone, but you remember where this food comes from. It would only take a five minute walk to approach the communal fire and snatch some away for yourself.

Only moments away from dipping outside that entry way for the first time in two weeks, you have another thought.

Neteyam only put one piece.

Would it not have been easier to leave a whole fruit rather than take the time to cut and separate one morsel of it onto a leaf as an offering.

It wasn’t an offering, it was an enticement.

You stay behind, trying to forget the sweet tang of the dessert.

Sure enough the suspicion is correct when the next night one piece of wrapped chocolate is left outside with a note.

Found this during the raid this week. There’s a whole bag left sitting in my hut. Let me know if you want some more.

-Neteyam

The chocolate is a tiny ball wrapped in a red textured material that is unfamiliar to Pandora. Chocolate is something you never knew of before Neteyam. However, now it has become one of your all time favorite delicacies, especially with the rarity of its availability. Neteyam took a great liking to showing you around the outpost and the stocked treasures they were stealing from the old Hell’s Gate post and the new trains they were constantly raiding. He would explain the random customs and stories of Sky People that he hears from his father while carefully unwrapping the delicious pieces for you.

Some days you would even have him read some of the English text, whether from the wrappers or other books that are kept around the outpost for the human scientists to enjoy at their leisure. You never understand a word of what he says, but the sounds are fascinating to hear in Neteyam’s familiar timber. Although the Mother Tongue of the Sky Demons, you’ve always been fascinated by Neteyam’s ability to speak it. Something very distinctly attractive about his extra abilities.

You sigh and thumb at the round ball of chocolate. It melts on your tongue, creating an explosion of sweet smooth sensations. Leave it to Neteyam to try and lure you out through your love of chocolate. That night you flatten out the wrapper, running your thumb over the English text that appears as nothing more than scribbles to you. It serves as a painful reminder of the golden memories the two of you have shared.

It remains clamped in your fist the entire day.

Heavy eyelids blinking open slowly, you can still feel the strange texture of that wrapper between your fingers. Contrary to your lack of activity, your body feels sore. Every muscle seems to be wound the wrong way and the air in your hut feels moist and stuffy. Stretching out, your foot hits the food supplies basket you keep and knocks it over. You stumble to put the object away, or rather you try to before you realize that it’s empty.

The last of your supplies is gone.

Regardless of your feelings and fears, you need to go outside today. It’s time to face the music.

Your toes curl and feet flex before carefully shifting to stand. Pushing aside clusters of baskets and tools you finally breach the front entryway of your hut. Expecting the air to have cooled down by now, your skin prickles strangely at the feeling of heat against your back. You rush to throw off whatever blanket or item of clothing that must have stuck to you but then your eyes are blinded. Sheer light invades your vision, drenching every sight in white.

Stumbling across the forest floor, it truly takes you more than a moment to understand what is happening. The harsh light, the foreign heat. This is sunlight.

A pure beam of sunlight that has not disappeared behind the moon yet.

Your delayed reaction finally allows you to search for the entryway and try to scramble towards safety but it’s impossible to see with the brightness of the world turned up to one hundred. Your eyes can’t manage to stay open for more than a second, each time feeling a burning sensation that is unbearable. Soon, though, it seems to be too late as your limbs grow heavy and your skin heats uncomfortably. Even when that last ray of sunshine disappears, your body continues to torment you with a rising heat.

The sensations become too much. The weight of your own head drags you down. The world spins around you in disorienting directions. Only a glimpse of blue skin is caught before you collapse into someone’s arms and the world turns blissfully black again.

“Move before I kick you out.” Mo’at warns, but her tone holds a morsel of sympathy despite the strict instruction.

You are laid out along the mat of her healer’s tent with half the Sully family gathered around. Neteyam can hardly keep his hands off of you, constantly checking to see if you have cooled down yet. Each time renders him disappointed, ears folding back against his head. Mo’at is quickly losing patience as she is constantly swatting the boy away in order to apply the series of healing balms.

“She’s burning up.” He protests, but finally moves out of her way. His idle hands find a new place along his knees where the blunt nails dig into his skin. Kiri and Tuk surround their brother but are careful to not impede too much on his space. His panicked dread rolls off of him in waves, a palpable tension that can be felt by everyone in the tent.

“How long was she exposed?”

“I don’t know. Can’t be more than a few minutes maybe. She was hardly past the entrance when I found her…I….is she going to be ok?” His voice cracks as tears finally well up over his golden orbs. Tuk places her small hand on his shoulder.

“Only the Great Mother knows that.” She pauses, looking up to see her grandson’s crumbling composure. “She is hot. Her temperature needs to drop significantly.”

The message doesn’t seem to settle on Neteyam. His gaze continues to focus on your unconscious face.

“Neteyam.” His head finally snaps up at his grandmother’s stern voice. “Go fetch me cold water from the river.” A basin is handed to the alpha but she can already tell there is reluctance in his expression.

“Now.” It’s harsher than Mo’at would like to be but she knows that getting the concerned alpha outside of the tent is essential for her to complete the healing rituals. His presence is a distraction that has her own emotions tugging her away from the work at hand.

Neteyam purses his lips and sends one last glance towards you. He cradles your cheek and leans down to softly press a kiss to your forehead, whispering promises to return. Then finally, he rushes out of the tent, driven by the given task.

The hours rush and drag simultaneously for Neteyam. It becomes difficult to believe that it has already been a full twenty four hours and yet every minute that your eyes are not open feels like a year to him. Jake recruits Norm and some of the other scientists to take a look at you in the outpost. Moat is naturally displeased by the change at first but even she can’t deny that the old metal portable is a safer place for you to hide from the sun. Thick blankets and rugs are hung over the windows to keep the rays of sunshine out.

Between the expertise of the scientists with their modern technology and the healing powers of Tsahik, things begin to look grim when there is little to no change in your state. Neteyam becomes increasingly more tense with every passing hour that yields no result. At some point his family stops trying to convince him to take breaks. Tuk takes it upon herself to gather and deliver a good serving from the communal fire for her older brother at every meal.

Kiri is constantly teetering between helping her grandmother wrap cooling salves of thick leaves on your skin and foraging through the forest for different materials that could be used to create various healing ointments.

Lo’ak tries to provide his brother with some pleasant company. If not that, then at least an annoying younger brother that can keep his mind off the matter for a few minutes. He tells jokes and shares random stories, usually featuring young alphas and the things their idiotic pride leads them to do. He has a plethora of these events saved up, having been training the new batch of future warriors almost daily. Those stories shift to other couples’ drama and fights when Neteyam laments over the past few weeks, assuring his brother that rough patches are normal in relationships and that perhaps he is not the worst skxawng to be found in the forest.

Jake and Neytiri watch the scene with sorrowful eyes, discussing in the privacy of their home what needs to be done for their son and you.

At hour thirty six, you begin to squirm. Every muscle seems to creek with each movement, seemingly as rusty and worn as the door to the outpost that takes an extra shove to open. It’s the burning heat that you notice next. It seems to travel along your veins and cover you in a suffocating cloud. It brings on feelings of almost claustrophobic symptoms.

Finally, the flutter of your lashes reveal your golden eyes to the synthetic lighting of the outpost makeshift hospital wing. Only one electric light is turned on down the hallway. The rest of the ambience comes from lit candles scattering the surfaces around you. Their flicker is soft and soothing, but it’s the familiar scent of timber and pine that has your muscles finally relaxing.

The surface beneath your head is cool to the touch, you rub your cheek against it.

“Tanhi.”

That soft makeshift pillow is his thigh. Your already burning cheeks seem to reach new levels of inflamed rose color as you drowsily look up at him.

“You’re awake.” His voice is thick with emotion, almost choking the sounds from his throat. On its own volition your hand shakily reaches up to swipe away the tear traveling down his cheek. His skin is cool to the touch, such a different contrast to the usual warmth that you remember radiating off of him in your nights together. Your thin arm shakes from the strain of holding it upwards, he grabs your wrist gently and reluctantly helps you lower it back to your side.

“Yes.” The sound comes out more hoarse and gravelly than you anticipated. You clear your throat before continuing. “How long have I been out?”

“Over a day.”

A few moments of sunlight and suddenly a day and a half has been taken from you. It’s a lot to process, especially with the hazy pounding assaulting your head with every moment. The usual strength and energy in your body seems to have greatly dissipated, leaving you feeling as nothing but a shell of your normal self. Your attempt at sitting up is not only hindered by the strain of your abs but also cut short by Neteyam’s large hands gently pushing you back down.

“No no Tanhi, just rest. Don’t strain yourself.” It’s too easy to settle your head back onto his welcoming lap. A small voice at the back of your head warns you of reversing all the progress that has been made, but it seems insignificant when Neteyam begins to tenderly brush his fingers through your hair. Nothing can take away the ache of your body and heat of your blood boiling but his touch does finally stir your heartbeat into a steady rhythm. It’s as if a weight is lifted off of you as your senses become filled with his essence. Every point of contact between you is like fire and ice. He is the ice that you welcome greatly, the only thing that seems to relieve the burning along your skin.

“I’m sorry.” You whisper, eyes almost closed once more.

“Whatever for, love?”

“I don’t mean to trouble you. I should’ve been more diligent, tracking the sun’s cycle..” Your lungs seize into a painful invisible grip, forcing a coughing fit to begin. Neteyam is quick to shush your sentence away and help you get some cool water down. His large hand rests over the heat of your forehead. The eldest Sully frowns down at you, no doubt still feeling the evidence of your raging fever.

“Hush, Tanhi. There’s no place I would rather be right now.”

You watch the shadows dance across lines of his collarbones and sharp features as he prepares another cool wrap to lay across your forehead. The grip you have on conscious thought is weak, but even at your mental peak you are sure that there is nothing more beautiful than the man above you. His harsh and sharp features that frame those kind and insightful eyes. He has an ethereal beauty that has always captured you.

“You’re going to be ok.” It’s unclear whether or not the sentiment is meant for you or rather himself. His hairless brows pinch into those familiar clenched lines. You recognize them from days he would come home to, the evidence of his still racing thoughts clearly etched into his features.

Through the constant ache of your body and heat that tries to lure you to sleep, it takes you a moment to recognize the pheromones drifting off of him. You’re surprised to find that you can still identify the shift of emotions through his essence. Supposedly your sense of smell is better than you thought for a beta. The curling sadness and anxiety that comes off of him in waves, however, is something you wish could not be so easily detected. It is foreign and strange when mixed with his calming perfume. Neteyam isn’t usually one easily frazzled.

Neteyam settles a clear plastic over your mouth and it takes a moment before you recognize it as the Avatar oxygen masks. The air filtered through it is clearer and more readily accepted by your lungs. After a few breaths you nod at him and he pulls it away again.

Silence ensues. You yearn to break it with some semblance of an apology or explanation, but the words never come. Your body has other ideas as it drifts in and out of consciousness. Several times you wake to see another member of the Sully family perched next to Neteyam. However, the oldest Sully child never leaves. The hold you have on time becomes almost nonexistent as you slip back and forth between reality and fever induced dreams.

Eventually you begin to wake periodically in Neteyam’s arms, head laying on his chest or coddled in his lap. Each time you consider saying something, knowing that he is no longer your mate. You have no claim on him and therefore no right to use him in this way, but his skin is cool and calms the sizzling heat upon your own. The very idea of creating distance between you two causes a spike of anxiety to take hold.

It would be all too easy to blame this on your fever and the aid he provides, even in your state of watered down thought you know the truth. There is a yearning to be close to him again. To feel the gentle caresses that line your lips and cheeks as you sleep. To fall into a fantasy where the two of you never split, convincing yourself that today is simply a small sick day where your mate pampers you. The natural instincts of your beta nature furthermore aches for the calming presence of an alpha. Even the simple actions of his rising and falling chest that contains a steady heartbeat lulles your nature into a submissive calm.

It is such a dramatic contrast to the empty abyss that has replaced your heart over the past few weeks. Falling into Neteyam feels natural, as expected as the waves that crash against the shore. It’s an ironic feeling to have considering the most inconvenient and problematic characteristics of your relationship. He was never meant to be yours.

You chant those words in your head, willing them to echo true.

This time, your eyes flutter lazily open to the feeling of his slim tail wrapping itself around your upper thigh. With creaky drowsiness you look up to find him fast asleep, lips parted softly with shallow breaths escaping soundlessly. Sprawled across him, head on his chest, this position resembles that of your usual sleeping position together. Or at least, what it used to be. Before the first cracks of dawn you would slip back into the tent and gently fall into his dozing embrace. It was not uncommon to find his tail slink around one of your limbs possessively all while never stirring from his unconscious state.

Looking around the dingy outpost, it’s just the two of you. The plastic material of the mask around your neck feels uncomfortable around your heated skin. You find a matching one around Neteyam’s own throat. Although showing no signs of struggling breathing, you gently place it against his lips. When the clear oxygen filtered through his lips, Neteyam stirs.

You contemplate faking sleep when his ears twitch and eyes slowly open, but they immediately land on you.

“Yawne.” Neteyam groans, voice thick with sleep. The deep rumble of his morning voice always makes your stomach do somersaults. “How are you feeling, Tanhi?”

His ears pin back when you veer away from his efforts to cup your cheek.

“A bit better.” Your arms tremble as they push against Neteyam pectorals to try and sit up properly. Despite his gentle protests, you finally manage to remain upright for the first time in days. The room spins around you. It’s only by the grace of Neteyam’s hands supporting your back that you remain sitting. “What time is it?”

It feels like night but then again the heavy blankets over the outpost windows would show no indication of broad daylight if present.

“Middle of the night.”

“Then I should go.” Your feet are barely planted on the ground before Neteyam is pulling you back into his arms.

“You don’t really think I’m going to let you out there in this condition, do you?” His chest rumbles with a stern timber, but his hold is tender and gentle. You are tempted to roll your eyes at the protective behavior, but you’re worried that doing so would put the room back into orbit again.

“You need rest.”

“I can rest at home.”

“Like hell you will.” Neteyam scoffs, using another phrase he so commonly picks up from his father. You can practically feel the protective growl that yearns to climb up his throat, but a sigh comes out in its place. “You’re shaking, Tanhi. Let me take care of you.”

His knuckles graze your cheek delicately, sending a cool shiver along your shoulders.

“I don’t think that is a good idea.”

Neteyam’s hand stills before dropping heavily to his lap. The heated breath coming from his lips tickles at the back of your neck. Were it not for your already trembling form you are sure that his presence alone would erupt goosebumps and shivers along your body. The pressing weight of silence is dizzying, tempting you to lay back down. You can practically hear the cogs in his head turning at a rapid pace.

“Please just hear me out for a moment.”

Turning around to face him takes more effort than you would like to admit. Seeing those sad golden eyes without melting takes even more.

“Five minutes is all I ask.” You hesitate, biting your bottom lip. “And if by the end of it you are sick of hearing from me then I promise I will leave you alone. My grandmother will take over caring for you and I will…respect your wishes.” His words are strangled, that suffocating dread pulling his features into a deep frown.

“Ok.”

The shimmer of hope is barely visible in his shining eyes but it still wrenches your heart.

“My entire life has been about being Olo’eyktan. I’ve watched my father lead the people since I could barely walk and since then I have always known that someday that would be me. I wake up every day and the first thought that comes to mind is what needs to be done in order to become the mighty leader that everyone expects me to be. For a long time I’ve thought that my path was already decided by Eywa. Find an omega suitable of being tsahik, settle down with her, and lead till my son can take over. I was ok with that, I’d accepted my fate.” Neteyam shifts to his knees, fingernails digging slightly into his own thighs. Apprehension spoils his scent, creating a new mixture you are unfamiliar with. It’s then that you realize you’ve never seen Neteyam nervous before.

“Then I met you.”

Your eyes dart to the laminate floor.

“I…I’m usually a lot better with words.” He chuckles nervously while rubbing the back of his neck. “It occurred to me recently that I’ve been negligent in our relationship. I never truly explained why I chose you. Why you are the person I can’t live without. Perhaps if I had we wouldn’t be in this situation now.”

“Neteyam it’s not-”

“Please let me finish, Tanhi.”

You nod softly, careful to not increase the already blooming headache pounding at your skull.

“I’ve never met anyone like you.” A weak snort transforms into a cough raking up your throat. “I don’t mean because of ailment, yawne.” He clarifies and you suddenly feel embarrassed for assuming so quickly. Neteyam pauses his little speech to reach behind and once again carefully bring a cup of water to your parched lips. Gratefully, you let the cool substance slink down your throat to soothe the scratchy ache.

Once he seems to be sure that another fit is not about to come on, Neteyam continues.

“You have this unyielding spirit, determined to forage through any storm. Eywa herself puts you in the shadows and you conquer the terrain. The air around you hums with a quiet confidence that is…” He searches for the right word. “Intoxicating.”

A laugh escapes your lips and yet you feel nothing resembling humor. Your hairless eyebrows scrunch in disbelief. Neteyam shows no acknowledgment of your reaction as he instead puts the mask back against your mouth.

“I’ve been drawn to you since that first night hunt. Surely, that isn’t a secret.” He laughs into his own mask that is raised to his lips. If only he knew how oblivious you were to his intentions those first few weeks. “You’re fiercely determined and independent yet hold a gentle empathy and kindness for those around you that I could only ever hope to imitate. And stubborn too.” Neteyam chuckles with a shake of his head. “Fucking stubborn enough to tell a dumb alpha like me off, consequences be damned.”

Your lungs can only manage a simple huffed laugh, but the corners of your lips are already turning upwards subconsciously.

“When I’m around you,” His eyes pierce through you. “I can finally bear that weighted pressure of expectations on my chest. You make it light.” Neteyam leans forward and tucks a stray strand of hair behind your upturned ear. “My little star.”

Your cheeks are damp and it is only then that you realize tears drops have been escaping your eyes. Neteyam thumbs them away with tender care.

“I’ve grown accustomed to sacrificing whatever it takes to become Olo’eyktan. I’ve written my life off as not my own. I’ve given everything I can and could in order to fulfill this role. You are the only thing that I can not sacrifice. And maybe that is selfish of me, but I also know that without you I’m simply a shell of the man I am with you.”

“I could never be Olo’eyktan without you by my side.”

“But how am I supposed to be beside you when I can’t even step a foot into the sun without falling apart at the seams?”

“You truly think that I haven’t thought about that, yawne?” Neteyam’s lips quirk into an amused smile. “I guess now would be a good time to tell you that Lo’ak and I have been building a black out healers tent.” You gape at him. “I wanted it to be a surprise. I suppose I should’ve known better than to think I could pull one over on you.”

It’s foolish, you tell yourself. Another darkened tent doesn’t solve all of the problems. It doesn’t erase the strain this relationship would have on Neteyam or allow you to operate during the daytime hours, unless you are content to remain in the tent for all of your days. And yet, there is a sliver of hope growing in your bosom.

“Nete, I don’t know what to say.” His braids swing over the intense eyes that focus on your every move. He’s tense, ready to jump in at the notice of resistance. “But, I can’t live my life in a dark tent.”

“Of course not. I’m talking about a compromise. Lo’ak, he takes over in the mornings while you and I start the day in the midafternoons. Tsahik duties in the tent for a few hours and then the rest of the night spent together. Leading together. Hunting together.” The dopey grin that spreads upon his lips is fiercely adamant in capturing your heart once more. It takes everything in you to not reach out and pinch the mighty warrior’s cheek. A notion Neteyam is known to reprimand with a playful glare.

“You make it sound so simple.” It’s too much to meet his gaze. You prefer the view of the worn down tiles as you take another calming breath from the mask. The pace of your heart is evermore increasing and part of you wonders if this conversation has the ability to make you faint.

A hand beneath your chin gently prods you to look back up again. He whispers your name, soft but clear in the quiet outpost.

“We have a choice.”

The words weigh heavy in the air, drawing your ears to perk forward in anticipation.

“I know that may sound like a lie to you. However, if there is anyone that understands their life being determined from birth, it’s you. You and I have been pushed and kept into our respective boxes, taught to dream of only the realistic paths ahead of us.”

You wish to say it’s untrue, but any other reality has been stripped away from you from your first breath and morphed into only that of fairy tales.

“We get to choose whether or not we believe that. I’ve accepted my destiny, Tanhi, but I can not bring myself to see my journey walking besides anyone that’s not you. I’ve already chosen. You are what I will not sacrifice.” Neteyam’s calloused fingers weave into your hair, hands on the sides of your head.

“It’s your turn, Tanhi. What do you choose?”

“Is that your definition of fumbling words?” Your chuckle is choked with tears. Neteyam’s short laughter joins your own, his lips already starting to spread into that smile you adore so much.

The past few weeks have been a constant building of that fortress around your heart. You’ve tried to convince yourself over and over again that the two of you parting ways is for the best. These mantras have ripped your heart out and left you in a state of empty sadness, but they also have created a sturdy wall, one that is hard to crumble. Naturally, it is Neteyam that ever stands a chance at breaking through. Sweet Neteyam that knows you so thoroughly that he doesn’t require brute force to get through, he finds a hold from the inside, reading you like a book until there is nothing left for you to hide.

This experience has been a draining uphill battle, but one that you have embarked on because you’ve been convinced that the right thing to do is often the hard thing. However, now, the story shifts. You are left wondering if perhaps this whole time, running away is not the hard thing at all. It’s staying that proves to be the most difficult battle to fight. It’s staying that requires your heart to be opened and at the mercy of failure and disappointment. Leaving Neteyam isn’t the noble cause you once thought it to be.

It’s hiding.

“You really have some nerve calling me stubborn.” You try to joke, but tears are already cascading down your cheeks at an alarming rate and you can tell Neteyam is seconds away from scooping you back into his lap.

“Well I admit being stubborn has its reward sometimes.” He quirks an eyebrow at you. “Perhaps it’s paid off for me this time?”

“Perhaps.” You smile coyly at him. It takes bracing a stabilizing hand against the floor to stop yourself from falling over when you lean forward but it’s worth the exhilarating feeling of his lips against yours once more.

Neteyam is cautious and gentle, moving his lips softly in sync with yours, but you can feel the restraint it takes for him not to swallow you whole. However, you are still healing so Neteyam treats you the way you expect any alpha to: like a delicate flower. Your own tears wet the canvas of both of your cheeks and it takes a moment to realize that small droplets are falling from Neteyam’s eyes too.

The kiss is warm and tender. Relief washes through your body in a wave that makes you realize how much pain you truly were in. How even the very bones in your body finally lose their ache when Neteyam slips an arm around your back to bring you closer.

You’re forced to break the kiss earlier than desired as Neteyam can feel the way your body lags to get air into its lungs. The soft pants that leave your lips are soon encased by the mask that the alpha slips over your mouth once more. The warmth of his gaze beaming down on you spreads across your chest and lights another fire along your skin.

“Come home, Neteyam.” You whisper softly. His forehead leans against your own, those golden orbs still shimmering with unshed tears.

“Always, Tanhi.”

The hours float by in a happily dazed dream afterwards. Neteyam’s touch starved state comes fully into the light as he is constantly keeping a point of contact between you two. It’s obvious that his alpha hindbrain has gone off the wall after being apart for so long and furthermore trying to care for you without going too far. Now that the green light has been given, Neteyam is constantly wrapping his body around your own smaller form till you are almost completely encapsulated by him.

Truthfully, you have no objections. In fact, even your own instincts push you towards readily accepting and initiating any forms of affectionate touch. It further helps that Neteyam’s skin is cool to the touch in comparison to your own raging feverish skin.

Within half a day your wellbeing has greatly increased after the constant nurturing of your overprotective alpha, who seems to be constantly slipping water, food, medicine, or mask given air past your lips. Mo’at is greatly pleased when your temperature begins to return back to its former state and there is a greater strength present in your body. Still, she instructs you to lay low for another day as a precaution.

Neteyam is more than happy to keep you to himself for another day. Watching you come close to the brink of death has his primal urges dialed to eleven. You have to scold him every now and then when his younger brother comes to visit and Neteyam thanks him with an aggressive hiss and tucking you safely into his arms and away from the ‘threat’.

It’s borderline shocking to see his strong reactions considering the severed bond between the two of you. That is, until you find the truth.

“I admit, it might’ve been selfish Tanhi but I couldn’t bring myself to cut our tie before knowing that I had tried everything possible to get you back.”

He had looked up at you with a guilty composure but after everything the two of you had been through you couldn’t hide your relief and joy in finding out that this bond had still survived the heartache. It also provides a greater explanation to your own body's willingness to melt into him with or without a resolution. Now, though, you are content to let him have his fun babying you for one day more and revill in the renewed connection the two of you share.

This time when you awake in the newly hung hammock inside of the outpost (Neteyam had used every angle possible to convince the human scientists to let him temporarily take up the space) you’re surprised to find your mate’s skin hot against your own. His thumping heartbeat rickets in your eardrums but instead of rocking you to sleep, the sound sends shivers down your spine.

Neteyam is blissfully unaware of your consciousness as your own heart starts to speed up. Shifting your leg, it’s a surprise to feel a sticky texture lining the inside of your loincloth. Blood rushes to your cheeks when you realize the source of this substance. Bashfully you’re relieved to see Neteyam is still asleep, allowing your arousal to remain a private humiliation.

With the cautiousness of a sneaking Palulukan, you attempt rolling off of the hammock and out of his arms to take care of your little problem. It’s only halfway rolling over to your side when the Omatikaya prince shifts and spoons you from behind. All plans are immediately thwarted when his muscular thigh slips between your splayed legs innocently. However, the pressure it incidentally puts against your clit brings forth feelings that are anything but innocent.

A veiny forearm easily clamps around your waist to pull you back against his chest. The act rubs his thighs against your clothed folds so suddenly, that it brings a whimpered moan from your lips. Breath hitched in your throat, you wait to see if Neteyam stirs. He shows no sign of waking so you try to scoot your heated core away from his thigh slyly.

Not only are these efforts unrewarded but also bring a tinge of sadness coursing through you. It’s a strange wave of emotion that follows. Arousal quickly windles into full blown desperation within a few heartbeats. The sensations are overpowering, racing through every surface of your body until all that your mind can focus on is the need to be filled by a mate.

Filled by Neteyam.

“Oh Great Mother.” You curse quietly.

Your first heat.

A momentous milestone that your parents have talked to you in great lengths about yet still brings nothing to light on the reality of the experience. You’ve had smaller mini episodes of heat, normal in the beginning of adulthood for Na’vi betas, but it’s only a laughable comparison to the clawing desire taking over your body currently. As a beta you figured that your own heats would be miniscule compared to the laborious heats that plague omegas earlier in their years.

Involuntarily rocking your clothed core against Neteyam’s thigh you now wonder how these Na’vi have ever survived such a demanding lust and lived to tell the tale. And that is what it feels like. Death if not satisfied. Pain if not satiated.

Embarrassment is thrown out the window in favor of creating a pleasurable friction against your clit. Hardly ever having experienced touching yourself on the rare occasion, you have no idea what to do. The corded muscle of his relaxed thigh feels better than your usual small fingerings drumming against the bundle of nerves, so you continue to rock back in a desperate rhythm.

The hammock starts to sway softly with your jutting hips. Some movements are rewarded with a spark of pleasure, only to then be absent on the next rock of your hips. Frustration is quick to brew as you can’t seem to find the right angle and pressure against your core. Shiny slick drenches through the thin fabric and onto the alpha’s thigh. It acts as a lubricant for your journey across his skin, allowing a faster pace to be adopted.

Your pussy clenches around open air, beckoning for a worthy mate to finally fill and claim you properly. It’s an emptiness that you can only compare to the tingling you have experienced after especially long makeout sessions with Neteyam, but it’s worse. So much worse that it brings tears to your eyes. The only relief is found when a lucky thrust finally has the fabric pushed away from your core and lets your small clit peek out and press against his azure skin.

Now without any barriers, pure ecstasy wracks through your body. It only amplifies when the muscles flex slightly beneath you, giving just the right amount of pressure against your clit. A knot forms and tightens in your stomach, quickly winding until it feels as if it’s about to snap. It feels almost dirty to realize that your slick has now coated the entirety of Neteyam’s thigh all while he is sleeping and yet it lures you further into a state of arousal than you have ever been before.

Your own thighs clench harshly around Neteyam’s to trap it against your core. A release clear on the horizon, every effort is put into maintaining that delicious sensation of your clit being assaulted against the muscle. Legs shaking and small squeaks erupting from your throat you chase that feeling relentlessly.

“Cum, Tanhi.”

Neteyam’s raspy voice pushes you over the edge with a shocked gasp. His rumbling growl of satisfaction seems to pulse through you in sync with the overwhelming sensations of an orgasm.

“Good girl.” He praises as your body trembles in the afterglow of release. Neteyam chuckles when a simple flex of his thighs has a whimper spilling your lips. Swirling patterns are drawn by the alpha’s fingers along your sides and arms.

Mental clarity returns in a flash, allowing the reality of the situation to sink in. You hide your heated face against his arm underneath your head while groaning in humiliation.

“Nete.” You whine.

“Hush, baby girl. It’s alright, no reason to get all shy on me now.” He coos while swiping your hair away from your cheek to finally have an unobscured view of your blushing face. “Especially not when you make such pretty noises.”

The words crumble any wall of resistance against the impending heat. Your body yearns for another release, still screaming at you for not being filled with your alpha’s cock yet. A cock that you can feel hardening beneath Neteyam’s loincloth and poking at your lower back.

“Neteyam, it really hurts.”

“I know, Tahini, I know.” He soothes, softly kissing your temple while brushing the strands of hair away. “My poor little star. A bit stronger than you expected, hm?”

When his thigh finally shifts away from your leaking pussy, despite the strength of your clamped legs, a noise of disappointment escapes you.

“So much worse. Neteyam please!” It’s hard to say what you are begging for specifically, but the alpha is quick to calm your worries with sweet nothings. Your limbs kick out and try to wind around any of his, subconsciously finding ways to trap his body closer to yours.

“If you want help, all you have to do is say, yawne. I know how to take care of my girl.” He turns you by the chin to make direct eye contact with him, a silent second measure to make sure this is truly what you desire. Hesitating is far from your mind as you nod and whine out little pleas.

Satisfied with your consent Neteyam grins and begins to descend down your body. Confusion swirls in your eyes when he situates your legs over his shoulders. The sex talk from your parents may not have been that descriptive but you know enough to realize that his cock is nowhere near your drenched entrance.

“How does that…” You trail off, head tilted to the side.

“Just need to get your ready first, Tanhi. Want my baby girl to feel good.” Pointed teeth poke out beneath his lips in his open mouth grin. The pads of his fingers tenderly brush and tease along your outer thighs, slowly making their way to your inner. Tingles of anticipation and pleasure trickle up your body. It boggles you how such a light tracing heightens your lust to new levels.

“How?”

His face softens and Neteyam coos at you while tucking a strand behind your ear.

“Just trust me, little star. I promise you’ll like it.”

So you do, even when his face lowers to your partly clothed mound. Neteyam’s nose presses against your pussy and he sucks in air like a man on the brink of drowning. Your cheeks set aflame at having his face so close to your special place, something you had never considered before. The rumble of power in his hungry growl, however, washes away any insecurity that would plague your mind.

“Smell so delicious, Tanhi.” He purrs.

Neteyam’s creates a path of wet kisses along your inner thighs. Careful grips on your knees allow him to maneuver your legs into whatever profane position he desires, easy access for his eager tongue and lips. His saliva and your slick become intermixed along the expanse of skin as he takes his time warming you up. Each time his lips come closer to your folds, you whimper needily. Heated lust entraps every thought you have, wondering how long it will be until the two of you finally become one.

The first nips at your left inner thigh causes you to jump. His eyes look back up at you as the pointed tips of those canines teasingly scrape against your soft skin.

“Just a little taste, yawne?” He asks, although the smirk along his lips suggests that it is less of a question and rather a warning.

“A bite? T-there?”

Neteyam chuckles at your clueless behavior. It’s been known among Na’vi to leave obvious hickeys and bites along one’s mate’s skin, but you’ve always assumed that to only be in places more visible and less…private. Your tail swishes anxiously as you think of those marks being so close to your heated entrance.

“Yes, baby girl. A little mark to remember me by, hm?”

A simple nod of your head is all the permission required for Neteyam to continue. He takes one last breath from the hanging mask before picking a spot on your inner thigh where the flesh is supple and tender, licking and kissing and the area in preparation. When his lips close around the plush skin and begin to suck, it sends tendrils of electricity straight to your core. Without even thinking you moan and grab at his hair. You’re stuck between the urge to push his head away and encourage him to suck harder.

Once released, the skin is left with a pronounced purple mark. One lick is deposited on the spot before his teeth nip and tug at the skin. You squeal and arch your back dramatically, Neteyam moans darkly he has let it fall from between his teeth and begin to soothe the skin with kisses and licks. The entire act scratches a part of your brain that is primal, satisfied by the apparent claim he leaves for all to see.

“Much better.” His tone drips with pride. “Thank you, Tanhi.” He kisses your knee in gratitude, as if you have given him some sacred gift, and perhaps for him that is true.

It’s only now that it occurs to you how many times Neteyam has held back from staking his claim on you the way most alphas do. You vaguely remember the indented mark of his own teeth against his bottom lip that would draw blood, especially after you have shared an intimate moment or he saw another male eyeing you for too long. What you had originally shrugged off as a habit now transforms in your mind as an act of self control.

Neteyam is quick but deliberate with his handy work of undoing the ties around your tail and hips. He slides the fabric away from your pelvis with an attitude of reverence. Cool air against your slick folds feels like a tickling touch that has your lust spiking dramatically. Burning eyes on your most sensitive area is like gasoline to the flames.

You attempt to clench your thighs together to protect your dignity, but Neteyam hoists them apart and back on his shoulders sternly.

“None of that, baby girl. Let me see how pretty you are.”

And there’s something in that phrase and his undivided attention that makes your toes curl. It becomes blatantly obvious that if he doesn’t hurry up and get on with sticking his cock inside your pussy, you will fall apart at the seams before there is even a chance.

“Neteyam, I’m ready. Please please I’m so ready.” You ramble, willing your legs apart to prepare easier access. Once he is inside everything will be better, although the thought of your virgin walls stretching around him causes a slight tinge of panic to break loose.

“Mawey, my love. It’s about to get good.”

However, frustration and confusion bubble to the surface again when you see his face lowering back down.

“No no, Nete. Enough kisses.” You whine. “I need you inside.”

His brows push up at that, the corners of his lips perking slightly as if hesitant to fully grin.

“Are you sure, my love? We can still wait if you wa-”

“NO! No more waiting! I’m ready now. I need you right now.”

He calls your name softly, but with a hint of unyielding sternness that lets you know it is important you listen. Even a beta can sense when the time to obey is present.

“You’re heat is a very powerful thing but also fleeting, Tanhi. I don’t want you to make such a big decision purely because of your primal instincts.” It’s a respectful and considerate gesture but your head is shaking before he is even close to finishing. If this man does not take you now, you’re ready to flip him over and sit on his member, inexperience be damned.

“It’s not. I’ve been ready for weeks. W-was just waiting to tell you. Take me now, stick it in now.” The ringing in your ears, you realize is actually the accelerated blood thumping along the eardrums from your racing heart. It feels as if the speed will be enough to burst your ribcage open. “I’m ready.”

Neteyam watches as your eyes clench shut and hands scrape against the woven material of the hammock. You’re braced and ready for the pain that will ensue upon penetration.

“Tahni,” Your eyes slowly peek open to see that the alpha hasn’t moved a muscle. “You love me, don’t you?”

The question throws you off guard, but the answer comes easily.

“Of course.”

“And you know that I love you?”

“Yes Neteyam.” Your hips scoot against the fabric, pussy fluttering as it continues to wait for the incoming sensation.

“And you trust me?”

“Always, Nete.”

The alpha hums happily at your response, muttering out a deep ‘good girl’.

“Then I need you to trust that I know what I’m doing, baby girl. Trust that your alpha will take care of you.” He tenderly brushes his fingers over your soft stomach. “And trust me enough to say if or when something doesn’t feel good.”

You nod hazily, keenly aware of the tickling sensation of his touch along your hips.

“That’s my good girl. Now let me get you ready.”

It’s still confusing when you see his head lower towards your navel once more, but you don’t protest this time. He’s right, you do trust him and he does have far more experience with sex than you by far. Your upturned legs are spread even wider by his broad shoulders as he leans closer and lets the tips of his tongue drag over you from belly button to navel. The saliva line goes down further and further until…oh.

It takes his grip on your hips to keep them pressed against the hammock when his tongue brushes over your clit for the first time. It’s a pleasure that is completely foreign to you. Comparable to the spark of dopamine that comes from your small finger teasing the area and yet completely different in intensity. He draws sensual figure eights along the bundle of nerves several times before swooping down to collect more of your arousal between your folds.

Neteyam is calculated with his exploring, performing in the way of someone who has crafted their art. When his tongue just barely swipes across your entrance your hands fly down to grasp his braids again. This time, however, the only thought on your mind is keeping him down there. His flat nose nudges at your clit with every swipe of his tongue along your pussy.

“Oh my Eywa!” You screech as that knot is quickly being tied again in your stomach.

Neteyam on the other hand becomes focused on another knot, tugging at the twine holding your top in place while still working on your pussy with zealous excitement. With your aid, the dangling top is released and falls to the side. His assault on your pussy pauses for him to trail upwards and lick along your quickly hardening peaks.

“So pretty, Tanhi.” He murmurs against your right nipple before taking it into his mouth and sucking. Meanwhile his fingers have taken the place of his tongue and expertly rub your clit. “My pretty little star.”

Gleeful pride twinkles in his eyes as he looks up at you, a string of saliva connecting his lips to your chest. Your small hands grapple at any part of him you can reach, finding purchase on his flexed bicep that holds himself over you.

The connecting lines of your thoughts are tangled into a ball of messy hunger and desperation. Never in your wildest dreams would you have imagined such strange things to be so exhilarating. A part of you wonders what else was not included in that sex talk.

His head is found back between your legs again once your nipples are red and pointed proudly. Neteyam licks, nips and sucks at your pussy like a starved man. Every moan of pleasure releases vibrations that sky rockets through you. It becomes too much to handle. You’ve never felt more fragile in your entire life than when his eyes connect with yours, one eye winking at you, and you fall apart.

Neteyam’s moan while licking up the white substance pouring from you goes completely unnoticed as the world around you spins and your ears ring. The gravity of this orgasm shakes you to the bones, floodgates of pleasure completely open in your brain.

Although it feels as if Pandora has slipped out from beneath you, the recovery from this release is swift. Your skin prickles with goosebumps and your pussy hungrily clenches around open air once more. It seems that the monster of a heat inside you grows more insatiable with every second. So when Neteyam covers one finger in the remnants of your juices and starts to prod at your entrance, you’re relieved.

“You’re doing so good, baby girl. This may feel strange at first, but let me know if it hurts too much.” It’s hard to focus on anything else besides the shiny slick that still coats his chin as he looks at you, but you manage a nod.

It does feel strange at first, your walls incredibly tight. Getting down to the first knuckle is easy but going towards the second proves to feel a little more strained. Regardless, you are happy to find that getting one finger inside is nothing near as painful as expected. Neteyam wiggles the digit and it makes you twitch. Such a strange sensation to be filled but, the longer he twists and curls his finger, the more you find yourself enjoying it.

“How does that feel, yawne?”

“F-fine…a little strange.”

Neteyam chuckles.

“I know. My girl’s pretty pussy is so tight.” It’s the pride and adoration in his voice that melts you from the inside out. The muscles of your cunt relax against him as he starts to slide another finger in.

This stretch takes a little more time, effort, and praise from your alpha but otherwise it’s smooth sailing. He scissors and stretches your walls with due diligence, even as the dark pupils of his eyes overtake the gold color. By the third finger, you’re clawing at his braced forearm and begging for his cock. Neteyam doesn’t immediately give in, reminding you of the importance of being stretched out for him. Frustrated by his noble intentions, you aren’t beyond playing dirty.

“Alpha please! Need your cock so bad, it hurts. Feel so empty.” The begging turns into sweet tones of whimpers. You can see the shift of his muscles as they tense. His pheromones take on a stronger hue, one that surrounds you like a cloud. Your small hand reaches down for him, fingers grasping in open air. Neteyam is quick to use the hand not half way up your pussy to hold your own, looking up at you. “You said you’d take care of me, alpha.”

Perhaps in a situation not distorted by desperate lust and the sweet scent of your erotic perfume Neteyam would be tempted to put you over his knees for trying to manipulate him, but the clenching of your velvet walls around his fingers is enough to keep him focused on being balls deep inside of you instead. You can see the moment that his resolve crumbles to ashes, it’s accentuated by a deep growl and narrowed eyes.

You watch with hungry eyes as Neteyam hastily claws at the strings of his loincloth. It’s a wonder that it doesn’t rip underneath his harsh fingers but it finally falls away and your pupils dilate at the sight. His length stands heavily against his stomach, curving slightly under its own weight. Saliva gathers in your mouth as you observe the freckled stars that glow under the dim light of the room and scatter over his shaft till reaching the tip. A bead of precum is settled there and for the first time, you understand the desire to put your mouth in such sinful places.

Neteyam preens under your awed attention, his hindbrain purring in delight at seeing his little mate impressed with what he has to offer. His grin widens when he notices your hand hesitantly reaching towards it. You stop, however, before getting to touch.

“It’s ok, Tanhi. You can touch.” The three fingers leave your entrance with a squelching sound. Neteyam confidently keeps eye contact while licking the digits clean with a soft purr, then that large hand is wrapping around your own and leading you towards his twitching member.

Even with Neteyam’s guidance, you’re unable to wrap the entirety of his width in your grip, but he doesn’t appear to be bothered by it. In fact, a devious spark lights in his smile as he watches you struggle to hold it. Although, you will probably never admit it outside of heat, you too enjoy the dramatic size difference between the two of you. On more than one occasion you have let your arousal ruin your loincloth just from having his large body completely wrapped around your own, tucking you away so easily.

A small gasp leaves your throat when his cock twitches in your hand. Neteyam can’t keep his cooing laughter in as he pets affectionately at your hair. He pauses to take a breath from the mask while still smirking.

“You see what you do to me, baby girl?”

The taste of iron erupts in your mouth and it is only then that you realize you’ve been crushing your bottom lips between sharp teeth.

“Is it…uncomfortable?” It feels silly to be so bashful after having his lips along your pussy moments earlier, but you can’t help but keep your voice down to a whisper. You thank the Great Mother for the privacy that the scientists have allowed the two of you over the past few days. There would be no recovery for your dignity if they were to walk in on this scene. Heat or not, being whiny and oblivious is embarrassing.

“Hm, sometimes my love. If relief is not given.” He guides your thumb to run over the head. “Mostly it gets my thoughts traveling to tempting places. Imagining all the different ways I can have you laid out for me.” The weight of your eyelids seem to increase with every word he speaks. His other hand running up and down your inner thigh only adds to the lust filled daze that has captured you.

“Wondering what you would taste like.” Being the cheeky alpha that he is, Neteyam doesn’t let the opportunity pass by without reaching a few digits down to his soaked thigh and swirling the substance between his fingers. He simultaneously continues to help you jerk his thick member slowly while sticking the dripping fingers into his mouth profanely.

“My imagination, however, doesn’t do it justice.” He hums with delight, his pink tongue swiping over his bottom lip to collect any escaping juices. “My thoughts are merely a facade in comparison to the real thing. They can’t do you justice.”

You subconsciously tighten your grip around him at the words, causing a low groan to rumble from his chest. Another trickle of slick coats your entrance. You’re in absolute awe at your body's ability to get close to cumming just from the dark noises and words that spill from your mate’s lips. Not to mention the twitching weight of his cock restrained in your hand.

“Then stop imagining and come here.” You leap forward and capture his lips with your own. Neteyam’s hum of surprise morphs into a viscous growl as your tongues fight for dominance. The little gasps and groans that slip into the kiss as you pump his cock is electrifying. It’s borderline addicting to see that way the mighty Omatikaya Prince bucks his hips for you. A sense of power to know that you can get him melting like this.

Never breaking the kiss, Neteyam shuffles your body forward and the two of you start to guide his cock towards your fluttering pussy. All forms of trepidation are gone. Your body screams from every pore that you can take it. You trust these instincts as the thick head of his member prods at your entrance.

Your lips part against his mouth in a gasp when the head slips past your entrance. Slick walls stretch in ways that you couldn’t have imagined and it feels as if you are about to be split in half. Neteyam continues to kiss and nip at your lips gleefully while carefully continuing to guide himself in inch by inch.

“You’re being such a good girl for me.” He coos as your eyes scrunch shut tightly. It feels as if the length will never stop, as if he is about to reach your chest from the inside, but Neteyam is patient. He takes his sweet time checking up on you with every inch and soaking his tone and words with constant praises. It does this trick, scratching at that primal desire to please your alpha.

When his balls finally meet the curve of your ass, little whimpers rain from you consistently.

“N-nete, so b-big.” You cry, forehead touching his own as you struggle to take in ragged breaths. He forces you to take a breath from the mask hanging from his neck.

“I know, baby. So perfect and tight around me.” His own voice shakes slightly. “God damn!” The english phrase sounds like gibberish to your ears but you understand the sentiment nonetheless.

Settled there to let you adjust, your head lolls to his shoulder. When his cock twitches, you clamp your teeth down on his exposed shoulder to stabilize yourself. Neteyam encourages the oral fixation through hissed words of praise. Tears spill from your eyes but it’s hard to say what the source of your crying is. The stretch is uncomfortable but you can’t deny the certain tinge of pleasure that courses through you when a slight shift reminds you of how full your pussy is. Eventually, your heat takes the edge off, rewarding your ability to secure a mate with a pulsing clit and dripping entrance.

It takes a moment to realize that Neteyam is calling your name, you eventually snap out of it when his lips murmur it straight into your flicking ears.

“Hand me your kuru, baby.” Your hands obey on their own accord. “Want you to understand how good you feel, Tanhi. How happy you make me.”

When those dancing tendrils wrap securely around one another, your eyes go from sleepy slits to dilated pupils of awe. It never becomes old being able to feel Neteyam so closely. To feel his breath and strength. To have his own emotions coalesce with yours. A vulnerable certainty of how he is feeling. In this state, neither of you can hide. There is no deceit. There are no polite formalities. You both have direct access to the other’s soul.

This time, a new current of sensation travels through the bond. It sparks into growing forms of ecstasy that makes you groan. It’s a strange thing to accept, but you can feel your own tights walls secured around him. Hugging him so tightly in the warmth of your cunt, velvety texture caressing him with every shift. Underneath that pleasure also grows an unyielding lust that pricks at his self control with every passing second. His hindbrain is screaming at him to move. To claim. To fill your womb with his seed until it drips out from you.

It’s better than if the words had come from his own lips. It sets you into a feral need to complete these fantasies.

“Can you feel me, baby girl?” His arms are securely wrapped around your middle to keep you tight against him.

“Yes Nete, feel all of you. Need all of you. W-want you to move.” The ability to form coherent sentences starts to slip between your fingers. Neteyam, however, requires no further instruction. Your back hits the hammock once more as his strong grip clasps around the soft flesh of your hips. The mask is settled over your lips by the alpha before he continues.

Slowly, but surely, he draws out with smooth and continuous thrusts. Your cunt clenches around him almost painfully, as if to keep him locked there. Once the tip is just barely past your entrance he starts to slide back in smoothly. The prolonged thrusts eventually angle in a way that hits a bundle of nerves inside you that has never been explored by you before. Neteyam moans in sync with you as he can feel your own pleasure every time the head of his cock rubs at the rosy spot.

It spurs him forward. You don’t have to explicitly tell him to go faster because he can feel it straight through the bond. It allows you to focus the energy you have left on gripping his shoulders for dear life. A brutal rhythm begins to take place, your legs wrapped around his waist.

“Oh Eywa!” You screech. The obscene noises of skin slapping fills the room along with Neteyam’s loosed growls and grunts.

“That’s not my name, Tanhi.” The alpha teases, but you can feel the aching desire he has to hear his own name upon your lips. To have the auditory satisfaction of knowing he is pleasing his little mate.

“N-neteyam oh haa Nete!”

His precision at hitting your g spot increases. Neteyam learns your body with an impressive speed. One hand comes up to palm and tease your breasts in his large hand. His eyes switching back and forth between watching his cock disappear inside of you and marveling at the nipple hardening between his pinched fingers.

Everything starts to become a blur for you. The origins of sounds are unknown. Several times you are surprised to find that the high pitched screams are coming from your own throat. Your body shakes and trembles as if it is about to shatter into a million pieces. And that is what you come to truly believe as it overwhelms your senses. It is so consuming and new that you start to sputter little pleas of mercy to your mate, convinced that you truly will die from this overload of sensations.

“It’s alright, Tanhi. You’re alright. Just let go for me. Let it all go.”

Your hair tangles in the woven material of the hammock as you shake your head. Neteyam thrusts become ragged and less coordinated but he slips a hand down to fondle at your clit. You scream and arch, cumming harder than ever before. Neteyam is less than a second behind you, feeling the effects of your orgasm through the bond. Warm ropes of seeds paint your inner walls.

The first normal sense that comes to you is the feeling of Neteyam’s heavy and warm body collapsed on top of yours. Heated breath tickles at your neck, intermittent with sweet kisses and nonsense murmurs. You let yourself bask in the afterglow. Your body is sore and motionless, but luckily Neteyam takes over. Only a tiny sound comes from you when he slips out.

“Come here, tanhi.” Your boneless body is pulled to lay on top of him. Soothing affection swims across the bond when you nuzzle your face against his chest. The swing of the hammock and rhythm of his heartbeat is quickly luring you to sleep.

Neteyam grabs your hand and kisses it sweetly. You can vaguely make out the sound of his voice, but the words are like garbled noises which never compute in your brain. It’s hard to say whether or not it’s english or if you just can’t understand simple words now in your fucked out state. Still, you like the way it makes his chest rumble.

“Neteyam.” The rumble stops, tail flickering as he waits patiently.

“I see you.” Your words are barely more than a whisper in the stuffy room but they ring true. He gently places the breathing mask over your lips again before your eyes close.

“You’re all I see, little star.”

Taglist @yurmomsawh0r @nilahsstuff @name-saken @luvv4j4ybe11 @stylishtoast @karateperson @henhouse-horrors @easy2004 @whisperingwillow0854 @whenercolorfulrainbowlol @neteyamtesuli

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woso-dreamzzz · 10 months ago

Text

Youth Team II

Hardersson x Teen!Reader

Part of The Big Adventures Universe

Summary: Your first crush

You first meet her during a friendly.

Usually, Denmark goes to everyone else to play. Not many teams want to make the trek over especially when it was winter and the snow had settled.

But there are always a few dumb idiots who want to play against the Under-Seventeen Euro winners and are willing to leave the warmth of their own countries to come over.

Today, it's Spain.

You haven't really paid much attention to who is on the other team (it's not like you would really recognise any of them anyway) but you're always up for a challenge.

You clap your hands together as you warm up. It's not too cold for Denmark standards but you can spot the Spain girls shivering as they try to get warm.

"They shake like a newborn deer," One of your friends says with a little laugh," Do you think they are just as unsteady on their legs?"

You stifle your own laugh as you head out to your position on your goal line. "They're just used to Spain. It's hot there."

"Hopefully the snow throws them off."

There's a light dusting of snow on the ground that you've found is pretty typical of the Denmark winter but is usually enough to throw off foreigners when they come to visit.

A small smile tugs at the corner of your lips. "Maybe they'll slip over when they try to kick the ball."

You don't have much to do during the match. The coaches have put out a heavy offence and your midfield easily scoops up the loose balls.

Spain's keeper is nearly as good as you but lets three goals slip through her fingers (though one is ruled as offside). You're better though.

Morsa always says it's not arrogance if you can back it up.

You know you're better than her which is why you're a bit confused when the ball comes rocketing past your outstretched fingers. You've mistimed your dive and your glove misses the ball by mere millimetres as it slots itself into the left corner of your goal.

You roll out of your dive. You're used to the snow of Denmark but it doesn't mean that you want to be lying on it for longer than you have to be.

You catch a glimpse of the forward that got the better of you and...She's beautiful.

She's celebrating her goal, fist pumping up into the air.

You make eye contact.

She smiles.

You go red and look away, your heart going pitter-patter in your chest. You grab the ball out of your goal and throw it off to one of your midfielders.

The pretty girl is still celebrating and you make a vow to yourself to not let any more of her goals in. You wouldn't let her win.

You don't let her win at the end of the day with a scoreline of 2-1 to Denmark. You'd say that your performance was decent enough but knew it wasn't perfect because you didn't come out of it with a clean sheet.

"Hola."

You jump in shock when the girl from earlier appears in front of you.

"Hola."

She smiles at you. It's a pretty smile and it makes you feel all weird and mushy inside. You don't quite understand.

She offers her hand.

You shake it and introduce yourself to.

"I know," She says with a wink that makes a blush appear on your face out of nowhere," You play for Linköping."

You're a little bit flattered that such a pretty girl knows who you are and where you play. You wish you could say the same about her.

"I'm Natalia, by the way. I play for Barça B," She says," Straight through La Masia." She puffs out her chest and you're not too sure why she's telling you this. "We're staying over for the next two days. You know your way Denmark, don't you?"

You furrow your brow in confusion. "Er...yes..."

She's smiling again. "Can I have your number? I'd love to have a proper tour guide."

"Oh! Okay!" It makes sense why she was being so friendly now.

Spanish girls are touchy. You know this because Tia Tana is a bit touchy sometimes so you don't see anything wrong with the girl pressing a kiss on your cheek. She lingers there for a moment and her cheeks go a little red - though you put that down to the cold weather.

"I'll text you."

"Who was your new friend?" Morsa asks when you finally make your way over to her and Momma in the stands.

"Oh...er..." You look behind you to see Natalia smiling at you. You feel like your cheeks are permanently stained red. "She plays at Barça. I think she wants a tour guide."

Morsa narrows her eyes. "A tour guide," She says," Yeah, sure."

"Magda," Momma hisses in warning," That's lovely, princesse. Why don't you head back and get changed and then we can go to dinner?"

"Okay."

Pernille watches you go. "Don't."

"Don't what?!"

"It's nice that she's making friends."

"I think that girl has more than friendship on her mind!"

Pernille laughs. "Remind you for anyone?"

"Huh?"

"I had a little bit more than friendship on my mind when I invited you on that maths course."

Magda's face goes a little red before she turns away. "That's different. She's still a baby. She can't date."

"First of all," Pernille says as she slips a hand into Magda's," She hasn't been a baby for a very long time. Second of all, we've somehow managed to raise the most oblivious teenager of all time. She doesn't even realise that it's a date."

The tension in Magda's shoulders deflates. "Yeah...Well, at least it isn't a crush on Princesse's end."

"I wouldn't be so sure."

You're walking down the tunnel and feel a hand slip into your own.

It's Natalia again.

She smiles at you, swinging your joined hands.

You feel all mushy inside as you try to hold eye contact. She presses another kiss to your cheek.

"I look forward to seeing you soon," She says.

"Yeah, me too."

#woso x reader #hardersson x reader #pernille harder x reader #pernille harder #magdalena eriksson x reader #magdalena eriksson #woso community #woso fanfics #woso imagine #woso #The Big Adventures Universe

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workingbynyx · 10 months ago

Note

heey, saw that you were open for requests so I would like to ask for a romcom jason todd x reader where the reader is flirty and has a crush on Red Hood, but has no idea that he is Jason Todd (their regular at the cafe they own) so he gets kinda flustered everytime he sees the reader when he is going to get coffee

(hope you can understand this, english is not my first language)

Beautiful Stranger — Jason Todd x GN!Reader

↷ summary — after a faithful encounter with red hood one night ago, you quickly developed a crush on the masked vigilante. but, would you believe if the cute regular at your coffee shop was him? ˎˊ˗

↷ pairing — jason todd x gn!reader ˎˊ˗

↷ genre — romance, comedy, a bunch of fluff ˎˊ˗

↷ warning/s — none! other than a few curse words, use of y/n and possible grammar errors ˎˊ˗

↷ a/n — hi anon! dw i LOVEEEE that request sm, i hope you have fun reading this as much as i had writing it ^^ i might've switched it up a bit in the process so i'm so sorry for that 😭 i also figured i'd use the wayne family adventures version of jason for this one since it kinda fits the whole theme of this fic hihi and he turned into such a simp in this so it might be ooc at some point help, enjoy reading! ˎˊ˗

"what the hell are you doing here walkin' around late at night?" the masked man said in between short breaths after taking down a robber that's been following you since you closed down the café for tonight. you were lucky enough to have 'the' red hood on patrol and save you from a potential robbery. the thought of him guiding, if not stalking, you and jumping on the thug as soon as he's about to make a move somehow made your heart skip at the act of service...if its even counted with them now laying on the ground unconscious.

what you didn't know is this man was jason, the regular you'd have come in around 9 to 10 am to have his morning coffee and sit around the shop until lunch. you always observed the guy to be somewhat mysterious but endearing at the same time, he'd always ask for the same coffee and pastry combo over and over again, not bothering to change his order. he became quite an easy customer to remember at some point, other than the fact that he had white streaked hair which made him attractive and memorable to you. in fact, everytime he came in all you had to do was ask "the usual?" and jason'll nod along then go back to his corner, mouthing a silent 'thank you' when you deliver his treat and maybe even strike up a conversation if he's in the mood.

but right now, jason is simply the infamous masked red vigilante who just kicked some ass for your own sake.

"my apartment is this way, how was i supposed to know robbers lurked around here" you replied in return, tucking in one of your hands inside the pocket of your coat as you froze in front of him. jason began approaching you and stopped when you came face to face, the height difference between the two of you forced you to tilt your head upwards— the all-white lens of his helmet staring down at you. "watch the news, its not safe out here. take the route to your right next time, and bring at least a pepper spray with you" if only his mask didn't have a built in voice changer you would've known seconds ago it's him.

you were stunned for a moment as he listed down things that'd probably go straight out your other ear. "y'know, for someone i just met you're oddly protective over me" you finally spoke, a hint of mischief underlying your tone. that's when you begun wondering who is it under that costume. is he cute? is he what you're imagining him to be like?

jason, on the other hand, blinked a couple times out of confusion if it weren't for his get up covering his entire features. "what?" he said. "nothing, it's just...i didn't think a vigilante would care so much for a civilian like me" you answered, an innocent smile creeping up your lips like an idiot in love. "its my job. obviously i should look out for the people of Gotham, shouldn't i?" he crossed his arms across his chest, covering the red insignia of his bulletproof suit.

"obviously, i guess i didn't have the special treatment like i thought" you practically said with a slight pout forming when you look up to him, going silent for a moment. "do you really tell all the people you save to bring pepper spray or just me? i wanna know if i got the special advisory from you at least" you added as a tease, earning a slight frustrated groan from jason afterwards. "i don't have time for this��" "well I do" you bravely chimed in without missing a beat. "i got all night even"

the sigh jason had let out was almost comical, he took a step backward when it's really just him starting to get flustered by his barista seemingly flirting with his other identity, who would've thought you'd find him attractive? not jason that's for sure. "get home safe, take the route i told you if you wanna keep your wallet stocked" then he noticed the small cut on your cheekbone, it must've been from the pocket knife the thug had.

he briefly pointed at it, "you got something" you lifted your fingers to search for it only to be met with a slight sting when you did, a small amount of blood staining your index finger. you hissed at the feeling, squinting your eye when it lingered for a bit. "calm down, its not that serious" jason said. "some alcohol and bandaid should do the trick" and you took his advice, you certainly wouldn't allow yourself to show up at work with a random cut to your face.

"y'know why don't you help and patch me up at this point? i could use some assistance" and you still had the nerve to decide and toy around with him for a bit...to see how far the both of you are willing to go. to be fair, you just wanted to know who was it under that mask— this could potentially lead to it if you're lucky. "what are you, 8?" jason replied. "no but i'm surely a 10" you winked playfully, the corner of your lip turning into a smirk as you watched his body language intently.

"jesus christ.." jason muttered under his breath, starting to walk away from this situation he's stuck in. "aw c'mon! that was a smooth line admit it! oh okay— well, thank you red..man! i'll see you soon...i think" you yelled from the same position you're in, seeing his tall frame go farther in the distance. jason didn't say nothing in return, but he kept a secret smile under his mask as he disappeared from sight.

its been a couple weeks since your last encounter with red hood, you took most of his suggestions that night and started going the safer route when you had to be on the closing shift. since then, you've been at the lower risk of getting robbed again thanks to him and his unforgettable presence. but it's not only you who hasn't stopped thinking about that night, jason was still trying to relive the moment of his barista basically flirting with him. he figured you would've known it's him within seconds...guess not.

it didn't bother him, it's the thought of your reaction to him being behind the helmet is what. jason wouldn't blame you though, imagine how shocking it would be to find out your regular is a vigilante at night. it's like betrayal but in a different form. he usually doesn't care about revealing his identity to the people he knows, but when it came to you it's different. he's conscious for the first time, he was overthinking things and coming up with plans how to avoid it from happening in many ways possible so he stopped visiting the shop for a while. it's becoming weird, you two weren't even close to begin with— so why was he stressing so much about it?

while jason spent most of his nights in Gotham thinking about you, you started noticing his frequent visits slowly turned little to nothing at all. you found yourself always anticipating the sound of the bell when the doors open to each customer only to be met with disappointment when he didn't come through. and today seems to be the same, you kept glancing over the glass doors hoping you'd see a tall, slightly scary and muscular man enter...until he finally did.

you feel your heart skip a beat seeing him after a while, the same feeling you got a couple nights ago but you didn't mind. you quickly went over the cashier, mentally ready to take his order with a smile. "hey! welcome back, i didn't see you in here for a while" you greeted when he stopped right at the counter. jason wore a red hoodie and a brown leather jacket layering over it, he must've liked wearing that a lot. "oh...uh yeah," he brought a hand up to rub the back of his neck, trying to come up with something. "i got caught up in work. i didn't have the time to stop buy for coffee" that's a lie. "but i'm here now" is he really?

"oh, you must've been really busy then?" you added, listening to his reason. "definitely yeah," lies once again. jason sucked in a breath, looking away to get a glimpse of the menu like he really is getting anything else other than an americano and cookies. "got anything new f'me?" he asked which took you by surprise. "you're not getting the usual anymore?" you said. "eh well, it gets old after a while" he says.

"that's fair, well we got new cake flavors if you wanna try them out. what would you like?" you then tap a few things into the register to input his order to which he asks for a latte and dark chocolate cake. you tell him his total and he pays for it, giving him his change and receipt. jason mouths a thank you and quickly goes to sit on one of the chairs by the window where you can still see him right in the corner of your eye, you catch him glancing at your direction while you made his coffee which is strange since he never did that.

jason on the other hand seems to be more fidgety, he figured he'd tell you the truth today after you get off of work but it's easier said than done as he's starting to think it was a bad idea. his frequent visits gave him the advantage to eventually learn about your schedule and today happens to be an early leave. he mentally hyped himself up, hunched over the chair with his elbows resting on both his thighs while he waited.

a few minutes passed by and you eventually finished making everything, putting the small plate and fork on a plate along with his drink as you brought it over to his table. you slightly crouched down to carefully place the plate in front of him followed by the drink and fork, jason waited til you were done and looked up to you. he notices the cut still there on the side of your cheek, seemingly in the healing process now. he cleared his throat and nudged his head toward you. "you alright? you got a slit right there" he started.

"hm? oh this. it's uh, it's nothing. i almost got mugged a few nights ago and had to hold up a pretty decent fight" you explained, clutching the tray near to your chest. "oh? well, did you win at least?" jason laid back into the chair, still looking up towards you to see if you'll mention about the 'hero' that saved you. "i guess in some way yeah, someone showed up and kicked some ass within seconds" you said, a smile slowly forming at the thought of red hood creeping your mind once again. "it's a shame i didn't get his name though, he seems like a nice guy"

"...who did you think it was?" jason started, a lump in his throat started forming the more the conversation went on. he waited for an answer, desperate to know what you think and what could be the reason why you did all that during that night. "i have no clue, but he had a red helmet and a pretty sick suit! i'm not a fan of vigilante but that dude's doing it for me. i wanted to ask him out but he looks out of it, he might've been tired so i don't blame him" a slight blush creeped into jason's cheek when he felt it heat up at what you said, he found it amusing that you were practically talking about him while having no idea at the same time.

"that's..that's great" he nodded along, clearing his throat once more as he focused on the food in front of him then back to you. "i uh, i also wanted to ask" your ears perked up at this, pursing your lips into a thin smile. "what time are you...getting off?" he finally says even if he already knew the answer. you were taken back by this, your brows raising at the sudden question. "oh uhm, probably in an hour or so. i have an early leave today so it might be even less than that" you started. "why'd you ask?"

"i..." his voice trailed off, he doesn't seem to get the words out without it sounding like he's asking you out— well, technically he is. "nothing, just curious that's all" he gave a stiff smile as he reached for his fork. "oh okay well, i'll be at the counter if you need me" you said with a smile as you walked away before one of your managers yell at you again for making unneccessary small talk.

jason waited until you went back before releasing a disappointed sigh at himself, he sets down the fork and covered his face with both of his hands— feeling embarrassed at how stupid he sounds asking the question and completely fumbling it over. 'you just had to fuck it up, did you?' he thought to himself. he's never gonna get this over with.

a few minutes passed by and you see jason finishing up his snack, the small plate of cake now left with smudges of frosting and small bits of crumbs and the cup of coffee almost emptied out. you were relieved that he liked the new menu item after months of eating the same thing, it might be the start of something new for him you think. although his question from earlier never left your mind, you tried searching for answers and it all came down to him possibly asking you out.

but why would he? he's way out of your league and he probably knows it, why would he lower his standards to a café worker when he could have anyone out there to go on dates with. was he messing with you or is he trying to give signals? it could explain why he always visited your café and not the famous ones in the city but still, you didn't wanna assume. maybe he's just trying to be friends.

you didn't even realize that jason was already standing on the other side of the counter while you were lost in your thoughts doing the dishes, you heard him call out to you which snapped you out of it. you turn to look behind and see him there with a sheepish smile. you quickly closed the faucet and wiped your hands off as you went up to him, "hey! what's up?"

"nothing, i just wanted to say i'm gonna get going. i still have a few things to catch up on back home" "oh that's fine! goodluck with whatever you're up to then" you cheered him on aa he slightly chuckled, the sound of hearing his laughter for the first time did something to you and you didn't know what it was that made it so attractive. "thanks, i'll see you around" jason finally says with a thin smile.

you waved goodbye and went back to what you're doing as you're trying to shake off the lingering feeling that you just felt, "and y/n" you heard him call out to you again. "make good use of the spray, that's a special advisory" jason said proudly, making his way out of the shop before you could even process what he said

"thank you! I'll ma— wait..." then it finally registered. "WHAT?!"

#dc comics #jason todd x reader #red hood #red hood x reader #jason todd #jason todd x gn!reader #jason todd x f!reader #jason todd x m!reader #dceu #✎ ─ nyx fics !#red hood x gn!reader #red hood x f!reader #red hood x m!reader #jason todd x y/n #jason todd x you #red hood x you #red hood x y/n

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onlyseokmins · 1 year ago

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the devil wears baby blue • h.j.s.

Pairing: joshua hong x afab!reader Genres: smut (minors PLS dni!), strangers to fucking lol Warnings: joshua hong himself 🚩🚩, swearing, alcohol, reader is a menace and tease too i'm ngl, grinding, groping, slight exhibition kink, degradation, name-calling, objectification, FINGERS (all of it fingering, riding, etc), mentions of knife/surgery, choking, wbk but major hints to big cock josh 💔, marking, licking, alluding to devil imagery uwu, roleplay sort of but not really, kind of public sex acts + a mirror, manhandling, lil slaps, dangerous fashion decisions + "fun" clothing shenanigans during sex ig????, mentions of car sex and oral sex (male rec.), dirty talk (joshua won't stfu), edging, lil bit of pain kink if you squint ❤️‍🩹, and tons of banter/insults, is there a thing like a wealth kink??? - as always lmk if i missed smth WC: 7k A/N: *taps mic* would love to thank @onlymingyus and @duhnova for proofing, hyping, and supporting me on this. also ofc a huge honorary shout out to @hwanghyunjinenthusiast for the constant cheering and screeching at me in and out of dms - hope you enjoy this hehe. idk if jackie will see this but her watch post(s) helped re-inspire me to attack this wip. and finally blowing kisses to the joshushushus in my inbox, i hope you'll like this! ps if anyone recognizes where the last dialogue is from, you receive a kiss on the forehead from me and get to spend one night with joshua!! 😏

↪ this is a loosely based prequel to idiot

Seungkwan's hand lays steady on your back, guiding you through the crowd much more efficiently than you could have on your own. He has a way of navigating through the waves of people with practiced ease whereas you would rather just be swept away. It's why you enjoy going to the club with him, especially one as crazy as tonight's.

You would think you were still on the dance floor with how many people are bustling around you, mingling and giggling just as much on the sidelines as they do moving to the music. Drinks in hand, they chat and flirt with one another so it takes nearly twice as long to make it to the bar than you think it really should.

"This better be worth it," you shout directly into your friend's ear despite how close you are to him. "For the amount of times my feet have been stepped on!"

There's a sharp pinch from his fingers that snuck to your side. "Told you not to wear those stupid shoes."

Though you can't exactly hear it, you can see how his pouty lips purse out in a huff. He's also grumbling under his breath and you're able to catch bits and pieces. Things like, "won't matter" and "swept off your feet anyways" and "don't blame me" make you roll your eyes.

"Acting like this is my social debut with the prince of wales."

"Someone's been watching too much Bridgerton. And with how often you fail to come —" he's interrupted by the loud thumping of the bass, "makes sense."

"You can't possibly compare me against your standards, Mister Social Butterfly. You know everyone… and you've probably screwed a lot of them as well."

Seungkwan can only guess a gist of what you actually say and is therefore mildly tempted to let you get lost in the sea of people like he knows you'd rather prefer. But he's finally made it all the way over to what seems like an impenetrable social circle, though the group readily parts to make room for the two of you to squeeze in. So, he'll have to bring you along for the adventure.

"Hey there!"

"Hello!"

"Fancy seeing you here."

"I know, right?"

Greetings are easily interchanged. Most of them are familiar faces — friends of your own or people you've gotten to know simply through Seungkwan's ever-growing collection of new instagram posts.

Jeonghan's got some poor new soul to flirt with again and Seokmin looks like he'd rather be at home watching cooking videos. Vernon is wearing headphones of all things while Seungcheol has a shit-eating grin on his handsome face. And you instinctively know Mingyu has to be up to no good because you don't see or hear him.

Not that you're actually paying that much attention to the same-old-same people, focus naturally drawn to the tall man standing next to Wonwoo. Light brown hair curls just beneath his ears, shaggy enough that the urge to run your fingers through and imagine what the tug of strands between them might feel like consumes you. It comes as a shock, considering that Jeonghan's had the same style before and you've never felt like this.

You drink in the baby blue shirt that compliments the mystery man's skin tone, top buttons left undone to showcase the delicate silver around his throat and framed by collar bones. The fabric's elegance belies the strength of the body it clothes, material straining tastefully in the tiniest bit over a broad chest and wide shoulders. Sleeves rolled up to accentuate the flex of his forearm down to the long, long fingers wrapped all the way around the glass of alcohol held between them.

"That's Joshua Hong," Seungkwan supplies helpfully though he can't hide how smug he sounds observing you and shares a knowing look with Vernon who snickers.

"Joshua Hong," you repeat and enjoy how easy his name sounds and feels coming off your tongue. "Is that so?"

"Yeah and to my knowledge, he's extremely single."

"Don't tell me that's how you introduce me to other people."

He feigns innocence. "Can't recall but even if I did, bet it's going to work in your favor. Don't look now but it seems like you've caught a big fish."

Of course, when someone tells you not to look, the first thing you'd logically do is look. Glad you weren't caught staring earlier now that the very same man you were drooling over has noticed your existence and is staring directly at you.

Brown irises drop down to scan your figure and the suggestiveness of it lights something deep within you. You're quick to nudge off Seungkwan's arm around your waist when Joshua's eyes linger a second longer on it than you'd expect, ignoring your friend's sassy mutter of "hook, line, and sinker."

"I… I really don't like that implication, 'Kwan."

"Sure you don't."

Joshua Hong's intent gaze is far from unsavory. Even if it was more perverse in nature, you think you'd feel drunk off the same amount of power it fills you with and you haven't had a single drop of alcohol yet. A swear word escapes under your breath at the dampness of your back — and elsewhere — before sending the admiring man a demure smile of acknowledgement and turning once more to Seungkwan.

"You were criticizing my shoes earlier?"

"'Cause you can barely walk in them!"

"Then let's put these bad boys to good use."

Your friend can only shake his head as you stride away. He'll keep an occasional eye on you from afar for the rest of the night but he has a hunch things will be… fine. He hopes. Wonwoo did say Joshua was a decent man, after all.

He'll have to be… if he's willing to put up with you, Seungkwan thinks to himself with a cringe as he watches.

Vernon hands over a much appreciated beer and he sidles up to the unbothered man's side, jutting his chin out in your direction and asking, "Are you ready for some entertainment?"

"Yo, always bro."

"Cheers to that."

Meanwhile, you've made it to the new company without stumbling once — something you're very proud of. You nod at Joshua. Nothing more than a soft flutter of eyelashes, alerting him that you're aware of his presence but indulging in nothing more. Instead, you choose to lean comfortably into his companion's space.

"Hi Woo, care to share?"

The bespectacled man wordlessly offers his nearly empty glass of wine, always easygoing and ever perceptive. Unlike his best friend who never fails to be endearing but can't take a hint to save his life. One of the many reasons why Mingyu has never succeeded as a wingman — unfathomably clumsy but still loveable in all aspects to steal everyone's heart involved.

You finish the rest of Wonwoo's drink off with a satisfied hiss at the taste but not without a snort. "I didn't mean that, silly."

He cracks a smile, returning the teasing with a fake, reproaching scold of your name. "Could've told me you wanted to steal my buddy and not drain all my alcohol!"

Joshua laughs — loud and clear above the din of noises surrounding you. It has an air of gracefulness to it and you're sure the club brightens in a way that's totally not from the strobe lights going crazy.

"So, this is Seungkwan's friend…"

You jab Wonwoo's side with a huff. "Hey, I'm much more than that!"

"If it's any consolation," Joshua cuts in with another laugh and a handshake, taking on a self introduction. "I'm just some guy named Joshua. Hope that doesn't disappoint."

"Just some guy, huh? One that wears a Royal Oak?"

He thrillingly doesn't let go of your hand, keeping a firm but gentle grasp when turning it with his to properly glance at the notorious status symbol wrapped around it. The steel casing glints just as fiercely as the sapphire glass over white gold hour-markers embedded on its face.

"Yep, still just some guy that's called Josh. Joshua Hong, to be exact. Scared you off yet?"

"I wear heels that have a one hundred percent chance of breaking my ankle to a place where there's a terrible combo of dancing and drinks. But you think I'd be scared by a pretty boy wearing thirty-some jewels around his wrist?"

He steals another appreciative look up and down your body. Not as fiery as the first one but still bold without shame, striking another bolt of heat that flashes through your veins and simmers in your lower abdomen.

"Taste. And bite. I'd expect nothing less from someone like you."

"Someone like me?" you scoff as he winks, taking a step back and extending your arm as far as it will go with the notion for you to follow.

"Dance with me?"

Wonwoo had quietly faded into the background and slipped away for another refill. Smart guy. There's no one to worry about leaving behind when you accept this unfamiliar man's invitation and let him whisk you in the direction of the dancefloor. But not before catching Seungkwan's mild and supportive yet watchful gaze before he raises his beer in a mock salute.

It's almost cute at how inept Joshua is maneuvering through the tumultuous flow and ebb of moving bodies compared to said good friend. The way his taller frame looks more like a poor cruise ship tossed helplessly in the waves of the ocean than the stationary lighthouse and its reassuring beacon you'd expect causes a chuckle.

"You're almost as bad at this as I am."

He shoots an apologetic smile at the same time someone once again jostles his shoulder, pushing him closer into you. "Nightclubs really aren't my scene."

You're not complaining about the aided proximity that lets you hear what he says without strain. Although you do try to match the beat as it changes to something more sensual yet still playful. Going along with the rhythm of the other dancers rather than against much smoother than Joshua's awkward attempt to mimic. He sticks behind you, failing to hide the blatant mesmerization at how you sway effortlessly to the beat.

"You're not bad at this at all."

You shrug. "I've been here often enough to blend in better than most. So tell me, what's a rich boy's usual scene then? Shanqin Bay's clubhouse?"

"Hah, you wanna come with me sometime and find out?"

"Only if you can promise a fun experience… oh," you throw a smirk at him over your shoulder, "and to cover all the costs, of course."

"A pretty thing like you would have anyone saying yes and wrapped around your little finger."

"Maybe, but only if they're worth my attention."

"Afraid to disappoint yet again when I spend most hours of the day in the operating room."

You turn abruptly to face him, grateful for the hand that shoots out to support your elbow despite his surprise at your dubious side-eye. "Are you a doctor?"

"Maybe."

"Director's son?"

"Cliché enough for you yet?"

"I recall someone who's wearing a Royal Oak saying I had good taste so I'm not going to complain. Though it would have been quite the story to hear you were the one under the knife," you take a step closer and slip a finger underneath his silver chain to tempt him closer, "to end up looking this good." When large hands hesitate to land on your hips, you raise an eyebrow. "Thought a surgeon would have a steadier grip."

"Oh." Brown eyes flicker with a carnal desire, focusing on your lips. "You expect me to be a rich, talented playboy and not be naturally handsome too?"

"Sorry, Doctor Hong but there has to be at least something wrong with you."

The polite smile he'd been wearing all night quirks up at the corners, changing into something more on edge. A little dangerous. Beckoning excitement. He spins you back around, hands solidly landing on your sides — this time without reserve — to prevent your lower bodies from touching and changes the subject back to when you approached Wonwoo and him.

"Do you always take drinks from guys?"

"Ah, hm. Just the good ones."

"Good alcohol?" His breath is hot against the ear he's speaking directly into. "Or… good boys?"

Biting your lower lip does nothing to hide the unfettered glee you're feeling. "Alcohol, of course." A breathy sigh and you take the leap. "Want a taste?"

There's no need to ask twice. It's like the right key turning its lock. The doctor's initial awkward movements are nowhere to be found as one hand smoothly leaves your hip, turning your chin toward him to meet you halfway with his lips ready to brush against yours.

At the last minute, he backs off and turns your chin to its original position of facing forward with a smirk you can't see. Who cares about a missed kiss when his other hand slides across your stomach? Urging you to press your ass backwards and grind against the very obvious bulge that his khakis do nothing to hide.

Its growing hardness and promising length cause you to automatically moan, arching your back with the feral need to feel more. Your head tilts to the side, hips swiveling and swaying not to the beat but the rise of his cock. The position willingly grants Joshua access to lick, suck, and bite at the exposed skin.

He hums along to the music with a melodic voice from what you can hear, though you find more enjoyment in the consistent vibrations against your neck. A naughty hand plays with the tucked-in hem of your blouse and an occasional finger teasingly slips under the waistline of your jeans.

You can now feel Joshua's smirk when in turn, your fingers tangle in the bottom hairs of his mullet. His lips curl up, moving to nibble behind your other ear and breathe in your scent. As delightfully predicted, there's a distinct pull by your rings when you tug them free from the strands that has him pausing. Eliciting a sharp hiss and equally as sharp — but appreciative — thrust against your backside.

In retaliation, the lax hand caressing your throat tightens around it ever so slightly while he growls in your ear, "You said there has to be something wrong with me, right?"

"Mhm, oh yeah. Totally."

"Wanna fuck around and find out, beautiful?"

Hook, line, and sinker was damn right, Boo Seungkwan. Of course, the devil would be wearing a shirt the same shade as the sky where heaven's clouds make their home.

And you eagerly take the forbidden fruit — his hand, once again — and teeter after him. The red flags are already starting to fly at full mast but into the dimly lit hallway you go, elated to find an empty and quiet corner right before the stairs leading down to the bathrooms.

Underneath the neon glow of the exit sign, Joshua pins you against the wall with your arms laying on his shoulders. If you thought the attacks from his mouth were rough on the dance floor, they turn ten times more animalistic now that he has something to support you with other than strong arms and big hands. A pair of soft lips and the warm wet tongue between them contrast with the digging in of his teeth that follow your necklace chain to its adorning pendant.

It hangs in the v-neck window of your blouse and he lets out a tiny grunt of displeasure at the breasts being concealed away by the fabric and its many buttons. That doesn't stop him from tugging the bottom of the shirt free like a petulant child, nothing preventing his fingers now free to tickle and feel up the bare skin beneath.

This man is good at distraction. You don't think much of the light grazing beneath your tits, only a fleeting and casual touch. It feels so good when he cups under them like an additional support for the bra you're wearing and squeezes, causing you to keen and push yourself further into him. Then quick as lightning, one hand sneaks around the back to unhook the bra's clasp and the other deftly unbuttons your jeans.

"Joshua!" you squeak in protest, stepping back and pressing flat against the wall. You're quick to rush and slap a hand against your chest to keep the beloved strapless bra that's served you well from falling to the ground. "Is your red flag undressing someone in public?"

"Only if you insist 'cause surely I would never decline such a request being the gentleman that I am." The doctor makes no further move despite the way he licks his lips and teases, only chuckling at the menacing way you squint. "Just know my full intentions are to be touching all over and especially under whatever layers you're wearing very shortly."

There's no use hiding the whine that escapes when he places a hand on the wall next to you and leans in with a smirk.

"However, sweetheart… "

You catch his line of sight dart off to the left and your heart plummets, the fear of being left high and dry (wet) setting in. "Josh — "

"You'll have to forgive this rich boy's schemes. You see, I've always been very spoiled and just have to take what I want right away. And you're much too irresistible…"

He speaks casually. Like your jeans weren't suddenly unzippered and he isn't currently running a tantalizing finger on the fabric below the waistband of your panties, causing them to soaken further down. Way more than they already had and almost where you need him but also not even close in the slightest.

"Though as a rich boy," he continues, "I'm more than familiar with providing a small courtesy here and there. Would this club's filthy bathroom offer enough privacy for you, gorgeous?"

"… Only if you make sure I'm presentable enough to get down there… and back up here after, for when I have to leave with my friends."

Joshua's eyes widen before he's throwing his head back and laughing, bright and cheery like he's not going to rearrange your guts. "So you don't expect to go home with me? Maybe I won't be such a walking red flag to you."

"Doubtful. Now fix me up, Doctor."

"With pleasure."

It's not like there are as many people milling about as in the main area. Still, it's good to be conscientious. The same adept hands re-fasten your top undergarment efficiently. When he ducks his head to kindly fix your pants — which is sort of hot — you take the opportunity to whisper in his ear for shit-and-giggles to gauge his reaction.

"You know there's a front clasp too."

He glances up from where he's eye-level with your covered breasts, eyes darkening. Bingo.

"What a little whore we have here, hm?"

The nonchalant, degrading question and burning desire in his gaze makes your knees weaken, arousal skyrocketing. Enough that you almost throw all caution to the wind for him to fuck you. Right here, right now. But then he's pulling away, offering a palm you can't seem to refrain from taking a hold of. And ever the true picture of being a gentleman — helps you descend down the dark stairwell.

Your killer heels really do nothing for you physically (besides the threat of rolling an ankle) because it doesn't matter how tall or short you end up with them on. It's the confidence and ego that are heightened exponentially, which is all that matters.

That's why you follow Joshua Hong into the sketchy bathroom, let him lock the door, and bat your eyelashes with a coy smile. Leaning against the sink and fussing with your blouse as he approaches like a predator eyeing up its prey. Greedily drinking in the bare skin revealed by each button that's undone until only one is still fastened — right across your tits — that the man can unclasp himself if he so chooses.

Barely anything stopped him before anyways.

And that's what also fuels you to put your arms around his neck, pressing your bodies close together. Even closer by hooking your right leg across his hip, the point of your heel digging intentionally into the back of his other thigh. It's hot and hard — the dick bulge that keeps growing pressed tightly into the snug warmth of your core — and Joshua lets you grind down and dampen his khakis for a few moments longer than expected.

"Desperate, aren't you? Didn't wanna fuck in public 'cause you're freakier behind closed doors?"

"Just a little." You fight back the urge to whimper or admit anything to him. Like you aren't humping his length that only swells more and feels achingly thicker the harder you rut against it, eyelids fluttering the few times it's able to deliciously spread your pussy lips just the slightest through your clothes. "I'm so wet — "

"The more of a mess you leave on my pants, the longer I'll have to edge you while waiting for them to dry." Joshua grins cockily at you trying to force your hips to stop themselves only to struggle pathetically in vain. "Think you'd like that. Haven't even gotten to fuck this hot little cunt yet and I'm already certain I wouldn't mind being buried in there for hours. But don't know if your friends will stick around for that long…"

"J-Josh, ah — Shua… mhm!"

"So I think you'd better behave if you know what's good for you," he stills your hips hard, "fuckin' slut."

You mewl at the hard, rude thrust that bumps your clit as if he was actually fucking you. Like goo, you let him manhandle you around so you're bent over and facing the smudged mirror, hands gripping tightly to each side of the sink basin. Aided by the reflections, you witness how he shamelessly ogles the tempting ass that's been rubbing all over him all night. And of course that means you have to perk up and wiggle your hips, giving him quite a show.

The small distance between you clears the lust cloud and you throw a smoldering glance over your shoulder. "If you fuck me with my heels on, I'll give you a chance with them off."

Joshua swats your ass — not very hard but you release a yelp of surprise. "Wasn't aware that you were running the show, sweetheart."

"It's my backside you're looking at."

"Knew you were mouthy the minute I saw you. You're aware of how kind I am, so let me give you a choice." He's anything but kind as he sighs and leans his weight over top of you. Despite the bracing strength of his arms, you feel suffocated by just being caged in between them and the overpowering scent of his cologne. "I shut you up with either my fingers in your mouth or around your throat."

Oh… decisions, decisions! Long fingers that would surely feel best deep inside your pussy but that wasn't one of the options. You purse your lips in thought and arch up, balancing the heavy cock supported by your ass and unconsciously pouting. Joshua has the audacity to look at the time while brushing back his hair and clicks his tongue.

"Wow, I'm letting you choose between sucking on my fingers like a slut or being choked like a whore and you still can't decide? What a high maintenance toy."

The urge to scoff is extremely strong. "Sucking it is then, Doctor Hong," you say sweetly and then add with a sneer, "like the perfect slut that I truly am."

"When your friends all said you were nothing but a gentle soul, I knew they were duped. Only one was partially truthful in saying you could be sassy which doesn't even come close. Little do they know there's a bratty cockwhore with quite a bite underneath all that charm."

"Haven't fucked any of them, that's why. No plans to either."

"Yeah, what was it you like — oh right, good boys?" He laughs — low, mean, and degrading. "Then what am I, sweetheart?"

"A doctor who's full of himself and needs taken down a few, ha, pegs."

"Ah, there it is." Joshua undoes the final button, slipping a curious finger beneath the bra's front hook pulling your tits together. You shiver when it snaps against your skin after he retracts, pointer finger tracing a lazy line up your throat to its final destination. "The attitude."

You willingly part your lips, lolling your tongue out mischievously to match the roll of your eyes. "Someone gets off on it."

"Is that so?" He smears the lipgloss on your lower lip by pulling it down before releasing it. "Do you think this is all a coincidence, darling?" Meeting the hardened gaze in the mirror, you shake your head. "The minute I saw such a sparkling gem on Wonwoo's story, I just had to have it for myself."

It's not hard to guess what he's referring to. A couple weeks ago, you wore enough scraps of fabric to just cover your nipples and the areas between your legs. Drinking far too much and hanging off of the WonGyu duo's broad frames while the whole gang partied it up together at Vernon's. You had even asked them to send you the videos and pictures after because damn, you did look hot as fuck.

Who knew it would be bait for an entitled pretty boy?

"At least you waited to find me when I wasn't drunk."

"Much more fun to break someone sober."

"Glad to know consensual exists in your vocabulary."

"How about it — will you let me destroy this little pussy of yours and ruin it to keep you crawling back to me for more?"

"Sure, if you ever stop talking and actually do something — "

Joshua's quick to shut you up, almost cracking your jaw with the harsh thumb that's jammed in the corner of your mouth to prop it open. The following two fingers are thrust cruelly inside as a replacement so it can move to keep your chin steady. They're able to reach so far when pinning down your tongue, ending up wedged near the back of your throat so you're already gagging around them.

"Most sluts behave the second I drop the nice guy act. But boy oh boy, it only makes you act up more, eh?"

He finally does away with your bra to allow those gorgeous tits to spill out and casually rips the garment from your body like it's personally offended him. Maybe it has. Shoving it away into his back pocket and then urgently tugging your jeans down. The binding position you're left in helps keep your shaky legs in place while you cling to the sink like it's a lifeline. Upper body supported only by the cruel hold he has on your face until he yanks it back so you're flush against him instead, the cool baby-blue silk of his shirt set ablaze by your shared body heat.

"Next time, wear something that has easier access. Or better yet… maybe nothing at all or I'll be forced to rip it off." A piercing set of eyes attempt to glare into yours that roll back delightfully despite what's likely some snark ends up sounding all jumbled. "Oh yes, there will be a next time, sweetheart. I have to train this cunt to yearn for my cock — and you don't think you'll get it that easily, right?"

Joshua chuckles darkly knowing you can't reply. But liking to be full of surprises, you relax your upper jaw while his fingers trail across your pelvis and close your lips around the ones in your mouth. Suckling and swirling once the tension in them relaxes despite the naughty thought of biting. That doesn't eliminate the occasional graze of your teeth as a threat, responding to his words in your own way.

"Just look at yourself, slobbering all over… bet you suck cock like a champ. And prolly like it real messy. How well-trained you'd look trying to balance on these pointed heels while I fuck that bratty mouth."

You moan at the visual he's painted in your head.

"That's right, darling." There's a mean pinch to your clit followed by the man's groan at the ruined fabric squelching between his fingertips and how the covered little nub was already begging for friction. "Now tell me how long your cunt's been warming up and soaking these drenched panties?"

"Since the beginning…" you admit once he's freed your sore mouth and chooses to bully your breasts next. "When you looked at me."

He snickers, pushing your underwear to the side and petting at the bare slippery folds. Just able to barely see a small glimpse of where his actions play with your lower body in the mirror. At least your expressions make up for what he misses seeing.

"Aw, this soft pussy started drooling the minute I laid eyes on you? While I was imagining all the things I could do to these tits," the hand on one of them palms at the rounded flesh hard. "This ass," his pelvis grinds in a slow circle against it. "Mhm, and of course, this hidden gem."

At that, a thumb brutally rubs at your clit while plunging a finger inside the warm, wet walls that eagerly pulse around it. You weren't wrong about how good the digit would feel inside, the length and stretch of its bony knuckle feeling good enough to substitute as a mini-dick when Joshua starts a slow and methodical pace with it.

"Thought about having you spread out in the backseat of my Bugatti La Voiture Noire, you'd look like a vision laying across its leather seats. And the best thing? No one can see inside so you'll get your much desired privacy while being right out in the open."

Then he's adding another finger, longer than the first. And finally one more with an additional push in and out of the others. Clearly his experience on how to work a pussy is more than helpful. Alternating between stuffing your hole full of all three or changing up the pace and number each turn.

And of course, your chest is attended to as well. Both nipples tugged in iterations to match the rhythm of each finger spearing into your cunt, the pendant of your necklace bouncing in time. Without fail, he hits the bundle of nerves with a deadly precision that has you going slack against him.

"Maybe we should do that 'cause," he mumbles in your ear, "this filthy hole is awfully good at convincing me to spoil its owner like no one else. Let's see if it can tell me how much it'll want me to fill it up one day."

Your ears ring with the devastating screams of white noise at the sudden stop. The moans you were letting out trail off into a dissatisfied growl. His hand falls away from your upper body while the one in between your legs merely sits nice and snug, still inside but not moving. Far too relaxed, limp even.

"Joshua!"

"C'mon, weren't you listening? Convince me."

"Fuck you," is what you spit out, glaring at the challenging and impossibly smug reflection of the menace behind you.

"You didn't say fuck off, so… I'm waiting."

Another check at his watch like he's bored infuriates you enough to move your hips. Whining at how his fingers fail to stiffen and only follow your pitiful motions back and forth. Out of protest, you reach behind and take a harsh hold of the hard length you're able to grab.

"Watch it, darling!" Joshua flinches and the way his cock twitches dulls the venomous words that come next. "Or I'll leave you here all needy and by yourself, waiting for some other pathetic dick to hop onto in order to satiate just a little bit of this wet and slutty pussy's behaviors."

Well, that idea doesn't appeal to you whatsoever so you lean on the sink with a huff to do what needs done. It's a struggle to stay balanced on your heels while grabbing at his wrist but a small part of you knows he won't let you fall, a bicep supporting under your breasts. Revenge comes sweetly by digging your nails into the tense muscle of his forearm and leaving scratch marks that have him hissing.

And now you know for sure — despite the doctor's incredibly huge ego and big talk, Joshua Hong's no better than a painslut.

"Hah," you breathe out and start to slowly rock your hips. "Disrespectfully, go to hell."

Ignoring the abrasive insult — because he's a demon anyways — Joshua focuses on the wet suctioning sound growing louder the faster you move. The feeling of your tits and necklace hitting his arm to the beat of your hip bounces and enjoying the view of how his fingers disappear beyond the jiggle of your asscheeks. Up into the tight heat of velvety walls as you force his hand to behave and serve your needs like one of your dildos, though they've never been this uncooperative.

"That's it. Yeah, there we go… just like that. Go ahead and make yourself cum riding my fingers, beautiful. Uh-huh, now who's using me like a little whore to get off?"

You're already losing yourself. Waiting for that rising wave to crest because despite his annoying mouth, Joshua's fingers are more than skilled enough to hurl you into a delightful climax. As long as nothing interrupts it.

"Answer me — or I'll make you choke yourself."

"Mhm…"

He likes seeing how your face contorts, moans getting louder. It's too addicting which is why he growls out, "Do it."

It's a feat to let go of the sink but the reward is to move his arm around your bra-line to your throat, making his hand envelope it. The visual in the mirror is depraved — limbs all wrapped and tangled with each other — and your half-closed eyes taunt the searing gaze in the mirror, repeating his words right back.

"Why not do it yourself, Doctor?"

"Are you some sort of succubus or what?" He spits out the question like it's the germs on the toilet seat next to you. Freeing himself momentarily from the grip of your hand and your cunt, the man's at least nice enough to assuage the pissed off whine with a consoling lick up your neck and tugs impatiently at your pants. "Take these off."

"Go fuck yourself," you mutter darkly with half the mind to walk out of there. But you do as he says, quickly shimmying them off while your clit buzzes and twitches angrily at the neglect of stimulation again.

Joshua's eyes don't look away, his hands steadying your hips and your pussy aching when you hear how he slowly slurps on his fingers to clean them. Once you step back into your heels, he throws the jeans over his shoulder.

"Careful with the phone," you threaten.

Joshua snorts and bends over to secure a strap for you — sucking harshly on the skin of your thigh as a "you're welcome" but pulling away before your hands can tangle in his hair and keep him down there.

"Wrong thing to say to someone who likes broken and expensive things. Shouldn't you be warning me not to break something else?" Suddenly, your other shoe dangles precariously off your foot when he uses a strong hand to lift and support your leg onto the sink's surface. "Like this poor pussy?"

The straining burn in your muscles and the added chill of the porcelain is all alleviated by harsh rubbing at the tender skin of your entrance. Middle and pointer finger eagerly prying sloppy pussy lips apart once again.

"Ah, but I might enjoy that."

A clear glob of arousal drips from your hole fluttering and clenching around nothing. Joshua leers hungrily past your shoulder at the mirror's erotic display of your exposed cunt and the wetness shining under the buzz of the bathroom's fluorescent lights.

"Dirty and yet it's such a pretty little jewel. Sparkling and glistening so, so lovely that I can't wait to watch it shatter while playing with it."

Finally, all three fingers from before work in tandem to scissor repeatedly inside of your tight warmth without forgiveness. This time, the devil has nothing but good intentions to send you over the peak of pleasure. His eyes can't stop feasting on the raunchy way your greedy hole gobbles up his fingers. The loud squelches accompanying his motions echo around the small enclosed space, mixing with the warm breath hitting the side of his cheek from your gasping moans.

Joshua thinks it's mighty cute how puffy your outer pussy lips grow and struggle to spread around the thick and long digits shoved inside plus the onslaught of his thumb bullying your clit. The angle shows the slightest bulge of them relentlessly stroking the bundle of nerves that has your leg twitching from the sheer pleasure.

He focuses on bringing you there, all on what you're feeling rather than his own pleasure because you have the most convincing cunt ever that deserves to be ravaged by a large, girthy cock. A shame it has to wait because he cannot give in so easily. But you're definitely a piece of work. Joshua likes that.

"Gonna keep making a mess on my fingers, darling? Leave 'em all sweet and wet enough for me to wrap around my dick later and pretend it's your pussy instead."

You'll be the death of him when your head rolls into the crease of his neck, drool dampening the skin as you mouth senselessly at the vein protruding beneath. There's a sharp sting — the certain kind he hasn't felt in a very long time. A telltale warning of a hickey, the beautiful colors of red and purple already rushing to the surface and decorated by little nips of your teeth after you soothe the pain with your tongue.

No one marks up Joshua Hong. Sure, he's had lipstick stains before but those can easily be swiped off with a handkerchief and washed away in the shower. He can't help but smirk though, knowing when he eventually wipes your sticky lipgloss off, something of you will remain for a bit.

However you can't go without a little punishment. If you can even call it that when he returns to wrapping a hand around your throat. Anyone else who dared to leave a mark would be walked away from. But you — you simply lose enough oxygen causing your head to spin more pleasantly than it already is.

And you claw at his forearm, scratching it up ten times more to serve as a further reminder for Joshua to look at. You're by no means urging him to stop but to earnestly keep going while simultaneously searching for something — anything — to anchor you down as you float into an almost unconscious state of pure ecstasy.

It's by far the strongest, most intense orgasm you'd ever experienced. Becoming nothing but a bag of bones in his arms as your walls pulsate around his fingers and the fruitful expenditure of your release drips down his wrist.

He stays in that position, unable to move anyways with the vice-like grip of your spasming cunt cramping his fingers. Instead, drawing out the pleasure as much as possible by squeezing and releasing the pressure on your throat over and over again. The true picture of debauchery — heaven and sin mixed in one — and he kind of wishes for a third arm to take a photo for a keepsake.

Everything in your body aches deliciously. You feel both refreshed and exhausted when you finally come to and even then Joshua supports your weak body as you try to regain control over your wits and whereabouts.

"Pants," you croak out and wave him off when he tries to gentlemanly assist. Which he still kind of has to when you almost topple face-first on legs that feel like jelly. "Bra."

Joshua's a little less enthusiastic to hand that over, bitter sarcasm lacing his words. "Wow, won't even grant me a souvenir?"

"Boo-hoo," you gripe back and pretend not to notice the eyes glued to the way your tits bounce when adjusting the garment around them. Turning to look in the mirror, you work on dulling the "just got fingered in the bathroom" appearance. "It's not like you need one and it seems even less likely you'll keep anything from a stranger, especially lingerie."

"Hm, I like how well you read me."

"Of course you do, fuels that large privileged ego. Don't get used to it. But, want me to do something about that one though?"

He coughs at the rather suggestive insult, shifting his pants and shirt that does absolutely nothing to hide the messy boner you're referencing. "Guess I did a great job if you're begging for it already."

"Oh, for goodness sake I'm being courteous."

"Cute."

Joshua admits it almost like he's startled by the words that escape his mouth. Further surprising both of you with a clumsy, sloppy kiss to the cheek when he leans over to fasten the top button of your blouse. As if embarrassed, he's already halfway out the door when he remembers to mention, "I'll be thinking of you darling, look forward to your call!"

You're left staring at the saliva spot reflected on your cheek in shock. And then, you wipe it off with the rest of the accumulated sweat to make yourself a bit more presentable and then head back to the club as naturally as possible.

Dr. Hong is seemingly nowhere in sight as expected. You figure it would be hard to return with a raging boner despite the low lighting and he probably left through the back exit to likely jerk off in his ridiculously expensive car. The visual of white ropes of cum streaming past the steel band of the Royal Oak around his wrist haunts your mind, making your aching core buzz to life again and your sticky panties even grosser.

Out of pure spite, you hope he stains his shirt too.

Luckily, Seungkwan is still at the bar when you wobble over in search of him. He shouts your name in mock shock, assessing your appearance with pursed lips and eyeballing your figure dubiously.

"You look like hell."

"Yeah?" you laugh it off as nonchalantly as possible, unaware of the phone in your back pocket lighting up with a returned text message from a newly saved number and a scandalous picture attached. "I just got back."

onlyseokmins: July 2023 ©

#ez.creates #svthub #joshua hong smut #joshua smut #svt smut #seventeen smut #kpop smut #smut #hong joshua smut #hong jisoo smut #if this flops so does the hong schlong #i fist fought this joshua in the parking lot and WON #svt.smut

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drarryspecificrecs · 1 year ago

Text

Most popular fics of 2022

✔ subjectively sorted by Hits || alphabetically listed || as of 2023.07 (4112 works) ✔ 2022 in review : (daily) complete fics + (monthly) longest fics + list of fests ✔ most popular fics of other years

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#drarry #drarry fanfic #drarry fic rec #harry potter #draco malfoy #2022 #year in review #(personal) the rule of three

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straws-and-sunflowers · 26 days ago

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I'm curious but what are some of your lawlu headcanons???

*cracks knuckles*

Luffy wise:

* before Law, Luffy was never in any sort of relationship, too focused on the next adventure to really indulge in things like that- cause it was the last thing occupying his mind

* When Luffy first encounters his interest in Law it’s at Sabaody but it’s just curiosity, after Marineford he feels indebted to him and it really kind of happens on Punk Hazard.

*Luffy despite how blunt and straightforward he is- like any normal hormonal human being experiences anxiety. It’s quiet anxiety when it’s not comical or fight wise but more emotion based and it happens a lot around Law! It’s a lot of- “Oh wow! Wait am I being too much?? Nah!” And similar things like that. He gets a lot more fidgety and squirmy near him and often in the night will be lying awake during his pining period and over the course of the alliance he’s lying in bed and he’s just kind of like “fucccccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkk.”

* He is NOT the first to confess, loss is a prominent thing in wanting to be strong enough to stop it-but how do you be strong enough to keep someone like Law around?

* He does however stare at the mirror sometimes and pretends to be Law and himself trying to work out a confession that might impress the other with fanciful words

* His entire crew is aware (you’re not slick)

* When he finally receives his first kiss from Law- he fucking explodes-not literally…his entire face is red for the rest of the day and he’s jumping up and down like a maniac

* and since Law is essentially his first everything he cherished those feelings like treasure, (it fucked him up when Doflamingo made fun of his and Law’s relationship- he got really unnerved)

* He’s just a lil guy- and affection from Law makes his head spin in circles, he doesn’t mind letting someone else guide him for once, it’s relieving having someone he can fall back on, emotionally and otherwise. After all, Law’s seen him at his most vulnerable how could he not trust him?

Torao wise:

Law doesn’t get slapped in the face until Dressrosa, it’s curiosity at Sabaody, empathy at Marineford, surprise at Punk Hazard and then holy shit Luffy just fucking destroyed that bitch

Law isn’t great with people- but he’s not an idiot. He took one look at Luffy staring at him with heart eyes, caught him mumbling pick up lines under his breath that he most definitely learned from Ace and then squinted.

It didn’t take a genius to put two and two together.

Law’s been in “relationships” but it was experimental shit and he wasn’t ever fully invested, I imagine it happened just throughout because Penguin, Shachi, Bepo kind of pushed him towards it… when it came to Luffy the feelings were so vastly different that it made him go to his friends and be like “I’m sick”

He was not sick.

Over the course of the alliance, Law just in general realizes how fucking funny it is that they both kind of like each other, and he’s a jackass so he kind of pokes and prods sometimes with light flirtations- and Luffy obliviously prods back- it’s a weird ass banter they share, and it’s comfortable

But of course with ups there must come downs and much like Luffy getting anxious over everything he does so does Law! But while Luffy’s is more directly tied to his self worth, Law is more about his past, his trauma, his reputation—would he be a burden? Would Luffy even have the capacity to pay attention to him-is this fleeting? Does this matter? They’re both idiots

When Law confesses it’s-it’s in the stupidest way imaginable he’s kind of just- I’ll be so for real it’s in WANO. YES WANO THE LAST OF THEIR ALLIANCE, YES WANO THEY ARE GONNA PART WAYS- YES WANO AND THEN BLACKBEARD FUCKING GRIDDIES ON LAW.

…..so sorry

*clears throat*

I just know- that when Luffy fucking dies- I know this because I’ve been partially spoiled I mean for fucks sake I know about Joy boy-

I know in his heart Law is fucking destroyed for a heartbeat- when he finds Luffy- when he sees him rise up like the light he is- I swear to god he screams his name-

IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BATTLE

WHILE KAIDO IS STILL UP

“MUGIWARA-YA!!”

“HAH?? TORAO?!”

“DON’T YOU DARE DIE AGAIN-YOU HEAR ME?!—I’M NOT GONNA LOSE MY IDIOT SOULMATE TO KAIDO! KICK HIS ASS!!”

#one piece #monkey d. luffy #one piece luffy #one piece law #trafalgardwaterlaw #lawlu #law x luffy #lulaw #one piece lawlu #lawlu headcanons #anon asks #inbox convos #anonymous

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stayconnecteed · 3 months ago

Text

🪐˓⠀˚⠀hold on tight⠀@⠀han jisung.

synopsys: it's the birthday of the twins in the group and the usual plan is to celebrate it at the amusement park. everything was going as always until they got to the roller coaster and noa had to sit alone. thankfully, the rules say that everyone who has no one to go with will be paired with other single ones. that was how han jisung ended up screaming and squeezing the hand of an unknown pretty girl who he quickly caught feelings for.

SEE MORE.⠀⠀⠀⠀10 . 5 k words⠀⠀skz mlist.⠀⠀series mlist.

⠀⠀⸺⠀⠀pairing ★ han jisung x f!reader.

⠀⠀⸺⠀⠀about ★ original characters guide.

⠀⠀⸺⠀⠀genres ★ idol au, found family, angst, fluff & smut ; love at first sight, strangers to lovers, friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, not really enemies but end up lovers, friends with benefits to lovers, polyamory. also, boy x boy subplot with original characters.

⠀⠀⸺⠀⠀hold on tight's warnings ★ first chapter! full into the spanishverse! this is the beginning of an amazing adventure, and there are practically no warnings. just jisung's anxiety. it will be his pov, so you know what to expect. mmm, and then fluff. lots of fluff, because he's afraid of heights and noa isn't. also, it's pretty clear ( me thinks ) but everything is in english minus the italics text - that would be spanish or korean depending on who's talking.

⠀⠀⸺⠀⠀author's note ★ hehe, hi lyra, happy ( late ) birthday!! i told you i was going to try and finish this by 14th y por mis cojones que lo intenté akshjaskd. you deserve it. hope you still like it by the end of it, and all the waiting was worth it <3

Everyone knew that the moment Jisung pulled on his hood and picked up his phone, his social battery was below zero. Unfortunately, at the moment he had no hood to hide from the rest of the world, and his anxiety told him that unlocking his phone screen for anything other than taking pictures would make him look terrible. He was wearing a custom-made black Balmain suit that felt soft against his skin, he was surrounded by strangers who were surely more famous than he would ever be, and there were hundreds of cameras pointed at him, waiting for his reaction to every outfit on the catwalk he'd been invited to.

Well, at least he wasn't alone. He had his manager, Jaehyun ーalso known as his older brotherー, sitting right behind him, Felix chatting quietly with another guest three seats to his right, and he knew that their leader was somewhere in all the chaos, also displaying an extroversion that overwhelmed Jisung. He couldn't understand, no matter how many years he had been witnessing it, how the two Australians in his Kpop group could strike up a conversation with anyone outside of them with such ease. And it wasn't even that he envied them for that ability, he just stared at them in horror and prayed that the panic wouldn't show on his face. But he had travelled all the way from Seoul to Madrid just for this, so he had to leave a good impression.

Stray Kids was starting to grow in fame, even if he wasn't really aware of the magnitude, and apart from music, his company wanted to explore other fronts. They were going to shoot a sort of short film by the end of summer, with one of the songs from their second comeback in the year as the soundtrack, and in addition to advertising, they had been considering the world of fashion for some time. The Louis Vuitton brand had snatched up his sunshine twin almost instantly, showering him in French clothes and affection, just as Versace had done with Hyunjin. It seemed that Fendi wanted to see how Bangchan's image would look in their campaigns, and it was rumoured that they wanted to make them international ambassadors.

He was grateful that Balmain had chosen him, of all the idols in the industry, to represent them in this collaborative event between Balenciaga and Zara for the winter campaign. He knew it had been an amazing opportunity for the group, and for him as an artist, but he hadn't been given the option to refuse, and perhaps it was that lack of choice that was making his perspective on the situation so negative. He was almost thirteen hours away from his family, his boyfriend, the rest of his band, in a place he knew nothing about, and every second he allowed himself to think about it, his heart pounded faster against his chest.

‘First time?’ whispered someone to his left, causing him to startle.

Jisung narrowed his eyes, focusing his gaze on the girl he had greeted nervously as he had sat next to her, in the seat assigned to his name. Her locks were slicked back and parted in the middle, all defined lines and gleaming aura, though the rest of her long hair fell down her back in a smooth cascade of chocolate-coloured strands, and her gaze was fixed on him, expectant, as if she couldn't help but let the almond shape of her eyes acquire that sharp edge. He merely nodded, smiling the closest thing to a gentle grin, his curved lips making hers reflect a more enthusiastic copy.

‘Me too!’ her shoulders twitched as he heard her poorly masked giggle, and for a moment he feared that the people around them were going to tell them off because of the easy, melodic way the laughter left her glossy lips. It was evident that she was a girl who caught attention without even being aware of it.

And then he realised that they were both speaking Korean. He frowned, because he knew that most of the people in the audience were Spanish ーand she certainly seemed to be, with her tanned skin and foreign accentー but the level was pretty good. He turned slightly towards her, knowing that they had been photographed together already, and approached her, leaving a respectful distance between them, clearing his throat.

‘Are you from here?’

‘More or less,’ she replied, leaning towards him, as if she were telling him a secret. ‘I'm from Spain, and I live here, but I'm from a town to the south, down at the bottom of the map.’

‘Oh,’ he murmured, his mind blank.

‘From your reaction, it's as if I've spoken to you in a completely different language’ she giggled.

‘The truth is, it's my first time in Spain,’ he told her, smiling more confidently, as if making small talk with that nice girl distracted him from the rest. ‘It's been from the airport to the hotel, from the hotel here and not much more.’

‘I can imagine,’ she whispered, nodding. ‘When I arrived in Madrid I felt the same way, but it's a city that has its charm. I got to know it through my uni friends, who taught me a bit about it. If you want, I can give you a tour.’

Jisung opened his eyes wide in surprise and gave a quick glance at his manager, in case he had overheard them. Maybe he'd gone too far in talking to a stranger, he had to find a polite way to turn down her offer without making her feel bad, and he had to do it fast, because staring at her with that look on his face wasn't a good idea.

‘Huh... The truth is... Well, I…’

‘Hey, it wasn't obligatory to accept the offer’ she soothed him, resting a hand on his arm gently, ready to remove it if it made him uncomfortable. ‘My best friend always tells me I have no filter, which is hypocritical because she acts the same way, but I'm sorry if it was too much. Do you want us to introduce ourselves first?’

He saw her smile as he nodded slowly, his heart still trying to escape from his chest, feeling the warm palm of her hand through the expensive black suit. But it was all right, wasn't it? She was a nice girl, who had a clear problem with trust ーof depositing it in total strangers, that isー but who apparently had no bad intentions whatsoever. And he was in a room full of people anyway. Nothing could go wrong.

‘My name is Abril’ she said, bowing his head slightly, ‘I studied at EID, the European Institute of Design, I have a little silly vlog acc on You Tube and I really like make-up and Paris.’

‘I'm Jisung’ he replied, mimicking the bow. ‘Han Jisung, and I'm an idol, and... well, huh…’

‘Nonono, you're doing it wrong,’ she corrected him, denying firmly. ‘I know you're an idol and what brand you're representing. That's usually known to anyone who's been slightly informed. Introduce yourself for real, like I have.’

‘Like you?’

‘Mm-hm,’ she made eye contact with him, and indicated the beginning of the sentence. ‘You're Jisung, you come from…’

‘Oh, yeah,’ he nodded, already more enthusiastically, understanding where she was going. ‘I'm Jisung, I live in Seoul and I'm a Kpop producer and singer. I like music a lot, anime, and watching documentaries.’

‘See, a fantastic presentation,’ she said, clapping quietly, but with a big smile on her face. ‘So it's your first time on a modelling catwalk.’

‘And yours,’ he replied, unable to bite his tongue. ‘Can I ask you a question?’

‘Of course’ Jisung realised that they were fully turned towards each other, and that with how focused he was on the conversation he had stopped stressing over the myriad of thoughts that anxiety was sneaking into his mind.

‘If you're from here how come you speak Korean so well?’ his frown was furrowed, lips forming an adorable pout, and she found it endearing because it was the same gesture her best friend used when she didn't understand something.

‘I like to listen to Korean music,’ she replied, hoping she didn't scare him off, ‘occasionally’.

‘So you know who I am?’ he asked, his leg starting to move up and down.

‘I know what group you belong to,’ April said, her smile taking on a relaxed, casual gesture. ‘And I know you're not the boy with the foxy eyes, or the one with the freckles, which are the most recognisable.’

‘Oh,’ Jisung murmured, exhaling a relieved sigh that he didn't know he was holding back. ‘Jeongin and Felix.’

‘Yes, that was it’ he heard her crystalline laughter again, ’I saw him around earlier, he came looking very handsome.’

‘Louis Vuitton is doing an awesome job with him, and they're very nice and attentive’ he explained, cracking a smile at the thought of his best friend. ‘He's been very welcomed, and our fans love it.’

‘No wonder,’ April replied, nodding, ’Louis Vuitton has a very good reputation.’

There was a pause, and Jisung looked away from the Spanish girl, suddenly self conscious. She knew who he was, not because she was a fan but because she had studied the guests at the event, but he didn't know her at all and it was starting to become less of a problem to talk to her and more a reason to feel bad. He wasn't good at starting a conversation, and he doubted that in a situation like that asking her about her favourite colour was the best approach.

He opened his mouth, determined to ignore the anxiety bubbling in his chest, but let all the air in his lungs escape as soon as the lights dimmed. His manager tapped him gently on the shoulder, alerting him that this was the first sign that the catwalk was about to begin, and the insufferable twitch of his knee going up and down uncontrollably became present as soon as the murmur in the room died down.

He had barely had time to talk to the girl, Abril, and just when it seemed he was finally able to make a friend of his own, he was interrupted. He wasn't even able to concentrate on the introduction to the event, on what songs were playing as the first models came out. All he could think about was how sweet she had been to him, and how unresponsive he had been in return, even the impression he must have made on her, and all the phrases he would have said if he could go back in time.

But then he felt April's soft hair brush against his arm, her bright eyes still following one of the girls around the stage as she whispered excitedly about how much she loved that specific outfit. And somehow, all the voices in Jisung's head quieted down a bit. He cleared his throat, as if he could reset the reaction he'd had, and tried to locate the model she was talking about, offering his opinion on the jumper she was wearing.

It didn't take long for them to start gossiping, choosing a classic one-to-ten point system to evaluate the clothes, whispering numbers to each other between models, slyly pointing at them to discuss outfits. Jisung had a good time. He didn't feel judged when April made him giggle and his laughter sounded slightly louder than it should, and he didn't worry about the image he was giving, even when Felix gave him a look full of affection when he saw that anxiety hadn't crept up his chest until it choked him.

Even as the catwalk came to an end, and the CEOs of each fashion brand came out to greet the audience, Jisung was still glued to the girl, clapping but exchanging murmurs, and asked her to accompany him outside, to the small terrace hidden from the eyes of the people and Stays on the street, to say goodbye. Or meet Chan and Felix, whichever made her feel more comfortable.

‘Actually, I have to take a taxi home,’ said the brunette, clutching her small bag with both hands. ‘I have to get there before the pizza delivery guy.’

Abril's laughter at the joke Jisung hadn't understood hung in the air, the Korean's face turning somewhat serious. After nearly two hours with her, maybe letting her leave so quickly didn't sound so good to him.

‘Maybe we can drop you off at home,’ he proposed, forgetting to glance at his manager to confirm that he could do that.

‘No way, don't worry,’ she replied, resting a hand on his arm. Her smile was genuine, and Jisung wondered if she really didn't care if she had to pay for the taxi or if she was just saying that to avoid compromising him. ‘It's right here... huh, well, near here. And my friends are waiting for me.’

Jisung looked at her, letting her know with a raised eyebrow that precisely because it was nearby, even if it wasn't, it was no problem for them to drop her off.

‘If your fans see me get into your car, my public career is over,' she added, this time with a compelling reason.

Jisung deflated, knowing she was right, and gave her an apologetic smile. Maybe in Spain the fans weren't as controlling as in other countries, but there were freaks everywhere, and a photo taken out of context could ruin her life and force him into hiatus.

‘Anyway,’ Abril continued, averting her gaze, but letting him notice the mischievous glare that didn't promise anything good, ‘if you're going to stay longer in Madrid, the tour offer still stands. Signing whatever NDAs it takes to make you feel safer, just as a friend showing you around town.’

‘For real?’

Jisung saw that as possible. It wasn't the first time they had attended events in other countries and seized the oppotunity to visit the city or go out with friends. It wouldn't be anything they hadn't done before. Even his company could run Abril's digital footprint if they didn't trust her. The city looked very nice, and he knew he wouldn't be bored with her. He could even invite Chan and Felix and introduce them.

‘Tomorrow is the birthday of two of my best friends,’ Abril explained, making calculations with one finger, counting days in the air. ‘We're going to Warner's, which is an amusement park very close by. I know Lucas won't mind if a few extra friends join us. And then I think we're going to Murcia for a couple of days, but you can join us. We're good people, I promise.’

And he knew she wasn't lying. A soul as pure as hers could only get along with people just as fantastic. The plan sounded good, and even if his managers wouldn't allow him to travel with strangers, they couldn't deny them a visit to an amusement park, so he was going to be able to see her the next day. That was enough for him.

‘I'll have to consult about the trip,’ he announced, taking a breath of air to pretend he didn't feel guilty about making decisions without the input of his hyung and his sunshine twin.

‘Mm-hm,’ she murmured, nodding. It was fair, she understood that.

‘But I'll see you tomorrow at the Warner.’

‘Oh my God, that's fantastic!’ she exclaimed, tightening her grip on the young rapper's arm, her touch warm in the Spanish capital's night breeze. ‘If you need anything, text me on Instagram!’

Before he could react, the girl threw her arm around his shoulders, pressing him against her body in a light embrace, and hurriedly said goodbye, unlocking her phone screen to check the time and blurting out a string of what sounded like really aggressive insults in Spanish. Jisung believed that Spaniards dined very late if they pretended to have pizza at eleven o'clock at night, but he himself usually made himself ramen if he got home past midnight from the studio, so he couldn't say anything about it.

He saw her white lace dress flutter behind her as she walked down the stairs to the main entrance and disappeared into the crowd, but he heard a loud whistle followed by an unmistakable ‘Taxi!’ in a strong, musical Spanish accent, so he assumed she would have gotten a ride the first try.

He turned towards the inside of the building, looking for Felix's unmistakable blond hair, which would be the easiest to spot in the midst of the people, and waited in his corner for his friend to get lost in the area Jisung was in. The staff would wait for all the guests to leave the venue before starting to collect chairs and decorations, but a few people with the organisers' branded clothing and name badges were already guiding the stragglers to the entrance.

Jisung felt that it would be an opportune moment to pull out his phone, and at least try to contact Chan or his brother to let them know where he was. After giving a couple of rather competent directions, it was Jaehyun who succeeded in reaching him, and Felix who greeted him with a pat on the shoulder and his eyebrows going up and down suggestively.

‘That's a rather childish reaction when you consider I'm a taken man,’ he commented, before the blond could say anything.

‘That wasn't why,’ he protested in response, the high-pitched whine catching in his throat. ‘But you could share her number around the group or something, in case anyone's interested.’

Felix laughed at his own words, as if he had told a joke, and Jisung rolled his eyes playfully. He shook his head, giving Felix up as impossible and turned to his leader when he called his name.

‘Did she know us?"

‘She's a Kpop fan, but not Stay,’ he explained, getting defensive. If they had been the ones sitting next to Abril, they probably would have introduced her by now and been close friends. ‘I wish you guys had met her, she has that responsible little girl aura in her.’’

He saw Felix frown, but ignored it. He thought it was a fairly apt description, but it was true that it was a little strange if you hadn't interacted with her. It reminded him a little of the way the blond himself lit up the room he was in, and made you feel special when he gave you his undivided attention. But he couldn't ramble on about what description to use for his new friend. He had more important things to think about.

His priority was to figure out how to introduce the subject of meeting up the next day without causing rejection out of mistrust. Because he knew that no matter how much he could inspire Felix's enthusiasm, the final say would rest with Chan and Jaehyun, his manager, who were directly responsible for him, especially overseas. And while Jae answered directly to Division 1 (and sometimes their mother), Chan would primarily look out for his safety. And Jisung had to admit that it didn't look very safe.

‘Jae hyung, do we have plans for the next few days?’

‘A scheduled visit tomorrow to the Bernabéu stadium for Chan,’ he said, trying to recall the trip schedule from memory. ‘But nothing else. Do you want to add anything?’

‘Can we go in the afternoon to the Warner?’ continued Jisung, waiting for that pause when the question would sink into their heads before they asked what that was.

But they didn't have to. Felix grabbed his arm, his eyes wide with excitement looking up at him, as full of excitement as Abril's had been when he'd told her they'd see each other tomorrow. He knew Felix wouldn't let him down ーwhat had surprised him was how quickly he had reacted.

‘What is...’ began Chan.

‘Do I want to know what Warner's is?’ interrupted Jaehyun, crossing his arms.

‘It's the amusement park in Madrid!’ exclaimed Felix, doing all the work for him. ‘Can we go? Please, please, please?’

Chan narrowed his eyes, recognising Jisung's gesture of faux innocence, but decided to keep quiet, leaving the decision in the manager's hands. For a few moments the four of them were silent, and Jisung could count his heartbeats in the time it took Jaehyun to contrast pros and cons. Felix had his eyes closed and his fingers crossed, and at the sight of that the manager could only exhale a defeated sigh.

‘I'll take care of getting the tickets,’ he murmured, hiding a smile at the excitement of the younger ones.

Unable to sit still, Jisung fidgeted once more in the seat of the tinted-window car he felt he had been in all day. It was five o'clock in the afternoon, and although Seoul would soon start to cool down, Madrid was still at a temperature he wasn't used to. It was very hot, and having to wear a mask and a hat to avoid being recognised only made his long-sleeved clothes more uncomfortable. He was looking forward to getting to the amusement park, but sometimes his only wish was to get to the hotel and take a cold shower.

The night before, he had made a video call with Minho, telling him everything he had experienced, from the tense moments to the sweetness of the lovely April. He had listened for quite a while until Jisung realised he had no idea what time it was in Seoul, and when the dancer told him not to worry, that it was worth listening to him talk about his day, Jisung hung up on him, because he knew Minho would answer a call from him even if he was very busy. He believed there were limits.

For example, when he found out that it turned out that eleven o'clock at night in Spain was six o'clock in the morning in Korea, and he was almost certain that he had woken Minho up.

But he hadn't been able to sleep, too excited about what would happen the next day. He had been up late watching videos on YouTube, and by the time he realised he could look up Abril's account it was already one o'clock in the morning. The long plane flight had messed up his sleep schedule, and he didn't really feel tired, so he started watching his new friend's latest vlogs.

He browsed through the covers of all the videos, guided by the images, as the titles were of no use to him ーhe didn't understand them at allー and ended up watching one from the previous week, which featured the logo of his band. As it started, an upbeat tune began to play while the intro was shown: figures of celebrities with the effect of being cut out of paper appearing and disappearing against a light background, and then the same words he had seen as the title. With one difference, however, the small addition of the name of the event he had gone to earlier that same afternoon.

And then April appeared, this time with her hair in a bun, though just as tight, and began to speak. It took Jisung about forty seconds to realise that he didn't understand a word she was saying. He snorted, suppressing a smile, and stopped the video, praying that there would be Korean among the subtitle options. As he searched for it, he found himself thinking that this was probably what all the international Stays were suffering from with their group's content. He should talk to Division 1 to make sure there was a variety of language options before uploading their videos.

When he pressed play, Jisung understood what the Spaniard had meant when she said she had researched which celebrities would represent which brands. The video was basically about that. She had a roulette wheel with the main fashion brands, all invited by the organisers, and throughout the twenty minutes of her explanation he talked about what the event was going to be like, and who she would meet once inside. At the mention of Prada, Valentino and Gucci, Jisung remembered seeing the people Abril was talking about. But the minutes passed quickly, enchanted by her voice, until he realised that she had left Fendi, Louis Vuitton and Balmain for last.

’The new addition to Europe is the three members of Stray Kids coming to Madrid,’ he had heard her say, as the group photos they had taken for Maxident appeared on his screen. ‘It's rare for a Kpop group to show so much interest into send so many of their members to fashion events, but we're thrilled to welcome them.’

Abril had given a short summary of how the Korean music industry worked for those who had no idea, and then had objectively detailed what role each had in the group and which brand had invited them. Jisung had liked the professional and open way she had introduced them, and once again he understood why he had felt so comfortable with her. She made you feel welcome, listened to. She made you understand without making you feel dumb. With one warm look you knew you could trust her.

So he had told Minho, before he noticed he was falling asleep again.

But at that moment, in the car, after a busy morning in which he'd been late for his gym session with Chan and then they'd walked around the city before visiting the stadium of his hyung's favourite football team, it was too hot. He rolled up the sleeves of the oversized jacket he'd bought before the trip once more and turned to Felix, leaning his head against the backrest with a huff. The blond, who had his phone in his hands as he played some Genshin, made an acknowledging noise, leaning against Jisung.

’We're getting close, Ji,‘ his manager said from the passenger seat, picking up on his uneasiness.

He didn't reply, too abstracted to notice that Jaehyun couldn't see him nod. He fiddled with his own phone, removing and replacing one of the corners of the case, deciding if it was a good idea to text Abril. He didn't have an individual Instagram account, even though more than half the members were considering creating one, and he didn't know if they'd let him use the group one for something like this. He hadn't discussed it with anyone, that he wanted to meet the girl at the Warner, and not knowing if it would look bad to his friends made him think too much in his head.

He wasn't even listening to the distracted answers Felix was giving Chan, when the older boy asked him about what kind of attractions they would find, which ones he was most excited about. He went into the Instagram app he had almost unused, then turned off the screen. He looked for Abril's username, which he had memorised from her Youtube videos, then turned off the screen. When he turned it back on, the search box had gone blank, so he had to type it in again. But when he finally had her account in his hands, he had to turn it off again. He wanted to contact her, but somehow it felt wrong.

And then he noticed Felix giving him playfully with his head on the shoulder, as if he didn't have to curl up slightly to do it, as if he were a kitten, and heard him say ‘Do it.’

He didn't even notice the way his own heart stopped, thinking he'd been caught committing a crime. He glanced at Felix fleetingly, his wide eyes colliding with his best friend's soft gaze, and snuck into the Spaniard's private messages, hoping his coy ‘Just arrived at Warner's, where are you? Jisung’ along with the blue symbol next to @ realstraykids indicating his authenticity would get Abril to see it as soon as possible. And then he took refuge in Felix's embrace, the two of them entwined like the hands of two lovers, answering Chan's questions with renewed energy.

Jaehyun escorted them to the entrance of the huge amusement park, letting them wander along the cobblestone paths once he displayed the tickets he had gotten the day before online, and Jisung tried to calm himself, not to look at his phone, to enjoy a moment with his friends. He let Felix, to whom he was glued by their linked arms, guide them to the first attraction, which had a short queue. Chan began to ramble on about the memories the pictures in the place brought back, and Jisung took a breath of air as he took in every person who passed him.

By the time Felix got his attention, Jisung had already had a heart attack for every straight-haired brunette girl he'd seen, and the touch of his best friend's hand in his arm brought him back to reality, to the spinning mugs with Scooby Doo decorations, and to his leader's terrible jokes about how it was a betrayal to be there without his own Mistery Inc. gang's dog, Seungmin. He closed his eyes to relax a little before the ride got started, and then had to hold on to Felix and his manager, looking for support that he could only find on the edge of the giant cup they'd been stuffed into as it began to spin.

It was fun, he thought. And then he let out a shaky laugh, hearing Felix's excited shout to his left, followed by one from Chan in front of him, and stopped thinking. He didn't need to. Not as long as he could rest his mind and fill his memory with moments like this.

And for a while it worked, leaving Scooby Doo's Tea Party Mystery and heading straight for the bumper cars themed on the Joker movie. The park was huge, and what was most striking was the continuity with which people were screaming. It was all conversation and laughter and screaming all around him, until he realised that he too was laughing with his friends, and talking. And he'd be screaming too, he thought to himself, when Felix pointed out all the roller coasters surrounding the hotels and the smaller attractions. The blond was going to want to go on one, probably the one that looked the most dangerous, as soon as they let him, even if he ended up passing out.

And Chan was going to let him go on one, even if it made Felix so dizzy, because it made him happy. He'd say it would be better if he could ride along with him, and that would leave Jisung alone, because Jaehyun refused to participate in crazy ideas like that.

So after leaving with sore knees, but with his adrenaline pumping, he had resigned himself to it. They used the map they had been given at the entrance to get to the queue for the Stunt Fall, the star of the park, and after fifteen minutes of pent-up nerves, they found themselves first in line at the entrance to the roller coaster. Chan went first, Felix behind him, following the directions in English from the staff, and Jisung waited for them to come back for him.

‘Are you here alone?’ the boy asked him, in a rough accent.

Jisung nodded, his throat suddenly dry, and he began to regret it as he saw that he was being taken to the opposite area where Felix and Chan had been placed. But he said nothing. It wasn't worth it. He didn't feel able to formulate a sound, anyway. His vocal cords were as tense as the muscles in his shoulders, and if the girl in the seat next to him noticed as the staff secured the harness to his body and the belt to his lap, she said nothing too. Jisung closed his eyes and tried to swallow, highly attentive to the remaining people before the attraction was full and they could begin.

‘First time?’ he heard from behind him, as he watched the same staff member lead the couple who had waited behind his friends and him to a spot further down the queue of seats.

‘First time?’ the girl repeated, this time in English. Jisung turned to his left all too quickly, utterly convinced he was experiencing a déjà vu. This time he didn't need to squint his eyes to focus in the dark, but to make sure that the girl he had failed to greet nervously as he sat down wasn't Abril. She didn't really look anything like her, her skin slightly paler and her hair chaotically curly and much darker, but she was the owner of a similar smile. Wide, kind, luminous.

Jisung nodded again, too overwhelmed to do anything else.

‘Not mine,’ she said, as if it were a matter of pride. ‘Whenever I can I come with my friends. It's pretty awesome, but you don't have to be afraid of safety. Nothing's going to happen to you, I promise.’

‘Huh..., thanks.’ he muttered, taking another breath of air.

‘Do you want me to distract you for a bit?’ the girl asked, tilting her head to the side, her hands clasped in the harness, ’Or would you rather I leave you alone?’

Jisung was grateful to be able to choose. It gave his brain the feeling of being in control over something, even if before she finished uttering the second question he was already ready to say yes to the first. He would give anything to pretend he wasn't about to die.

‘A..., a distraction wouldn't be bad, actually,’ he managed to whisper, his words achieving to soften his travelling companion's sharp gaze.

‘Mm-hm, I'll tell you things then,’ she warned him, as if Jisung could back out at any moment. ‘You can interrupt me at any time, or tell me things yourself if you like. Did you come alone?’

‘No,’ he replied, glad to be able to focus on something other than the way the harness was digging into his skin. ‘I came with two friends, but we got separated.’

‘Oh, you didn't see the sign.’ she sighed, frowning as if the information really hurt.

‘What sign?’

‘We didn't see it the first time we came either,’ the girl recounted. ‘While you're queuing to get on, there's a sign that says if you don't have a partner to share seats with, they'll put you with someone who doesn't have one either. That's why they put you with me.’

‘You came alone?’ asked Jisung.

‘Nope,’ she said, smiling. ’I also came with my friends. But there are five of us. One gets dizzy so she goes with the one who doesn't have phobia to highs. And of the other three, last time Lucas went alone, so this time it was my turn. My name is Noa, by the way.’

‘Jisung.’ he spoke, more cheerful. ‘The same thing happened to me. Felix gets dizzy, so he can't go alone. And I wouldn't be much help either.’

‘It's all right, Jisung,’ said Noa, savouring every syllable of his name, ‘you can be helpful to me. Sometimes I need to squeeze someone's hand when the curves are too pronounced. If you need it too, we can make a deal.’

It sounded good. He knew she would gain nothing and that she was proposing it because he was probably so pale he looked sick. It was him who needed to be able to anchor himself to someone so he wouldn't get too overwhelmed, or dizzy, or faint, like Felix. Noa was already being helpful herself, and he would be eternally grateful - it was either trust her or ask the boring boy from before to get him out of there and let him put his feet on solid ground. For a moment he even wondered if she was so kind to all the rookies they put next to her when she went alone, or if he had been an exception.

‘I'd like to make the deal,’ he confided, putting his hand in front of them.

She took it, and Jisung's breathe hitched, feeling Noa's soft palm against his. ‘I promise to hold your hand very tightly and let you know what's going to happen so you won't be caught by surprise.’

‘I promise not to let go of your hand, and to hold it a lot tighter in response,’ he said, finally smiling, letting the air that had caught in his throat come out shakily.

They did not separate their hands once the deal was done. Instead, Noa rested them in her lap, humming whatever song was on her mind, giving Jisung a chance to observe her. She was tan, not as dark as April, but a caramel shade that made the light freckles on her cheeks blend in with the wrinkles that formed in her eyes when she smiled. Her hair was in a high ponytail, but the curls spilled over her bare shoulders like cascades of coffee. The top she wore was red, flashy, with a straight across neckline that clung to her chest, crossed by a black belt pouch.

He let his gaze wander until Noa's voice brought him back to reality, ‘There's a minute left, maybe you should put your hat away, so it doesn't fly off.’

Jisung hadn't thought of that. The clothes he was wearing were loose, just the way he liked them, and he hadn't brought a backpack. All his belongings were with Jaehyun, as were Felix's and Chan's, so he didn't know where he could leave it. Noa probably saw the doubt in his eyes, because with her free hand she reached up to his head, murmuring a quiet ‘May I?’ and waiting for a nod before taking it. Jisung watched her fold it in half and tuck it as best she could behind her back, shoving it between her skin and the secure grip of her bra. His cheeks flushed red when he noticed, but he said nothing, letting her settle back in.

She flashed him a smile and he grinned back, leaning back against the seat, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. He felt Noa's hand give him a friendly squeeze, and even though fear was beginning to build in his chest, nerves rising in his throat, vertigo clouding his mind, he was able to return the squeeze, stroking the back of Noa's hand with his thumb.

And when the ride started, Jisung began to scream.

Once they returned to their point of origin, silence fell. It lasted only a few seconds before trembling sighs and adrenaline-fuelled screams began to sound, reactions that gradually ranged from euphoria to relief. Jisung would consider himself in the latter group, his heart pumping blood at full speed, if he wasn't too busy trying to figure out if all his limbs were still part of his body. His chest was rising and falling in hurried movements that looked too much like terrified hyperventilation, and he was still holding Noa's hand as if his life depended on it.

She belonged to the first group, however. She was a little dishevelled, taking big breaths of air, but her eyes shone with the intensity of someone who had just experienced a great adventure. Jisung wanted to memorise that vision, but he felt a tingling on his skin that made him uncomfortable, so he tried to close his eyes and think of something else. The worst part was over. He should have informed himself before going up, because he certainly wouldn't have set foot on the Stunt Fall if he knew it had a free-fall section of at least fifty metres, but at least he'd been lucky enough to get the ride with Noa.

While he had been screaming, yelling out phrases in Korean and English, thinking that his heart was going to burst out of his chest at any moment and that he was making a fool of himself in front of a beautiful girl, Noa had warned him that the worst moment was coming, and to close his eyes tightly. He had reacted two seconds too late, and by the time he saw the void opening up before him, even though he had curled up in his seat, his imagination had done the rest. It felt like the longest moment of his life, and he couldn't even recover before the ride played another trick on him with a section where the seats spun on their axis and he ended up upside down.

He didn't know whether he wanted to curse Felix for his love of roller coasters, or Abril for mentioning Warner.

He had to check if she had replied to his message. The reminder of Abril's presence at the park hit him like a bucket of cold water, knowing he'd left his phone in his brother's hands and would probably murder him if he found out, and he tried to get up, not realising he was still strapped into the seat by the harness. The restraint caused him to become even more distressed, his hand still numb but gripping Noa's tightly, and he gave her a frightened look.

Noa realised immediately what was happening, and slid her hand from his gently, holding it by the back to leave a quick caress. She removed the safety bar that had allowed them to hold on to something during the trip, and undid her harness before jumping down to the solid ground and starting to undo Jisung's. She removed buckles and loops quickly with the speed of someone who knows how they work, taking Jisung by the arm and escorting him to one of the less crowded corridors nearby. Jisung let himself be guided, his gaze blurring and his chest constricting his lungs, preventing him from breathing normally.

Jisung was losing control of the situation, and being aware of it made him feel even more overwhelmed. The heat wasn't helping, and even though the shirt he was wearing was quite thin, because he could feel Noa's hand on his arm, it clung to his skin with sweat. His legs were shaking, though whether it was his anxiety or the effect of the roller coaster, he didn't know, and he was shivering. The high temperature of the park, with all the people everywhere, seemed to grow by the minute, and Jisung thought it was very likely that he would pass out right there and never be able to return to Korea. No one would find him, no one would come looking for him.

‘Hey, Sung,’ Noa murmured, rubbing his arms, ’can I call you Sung, mm?’

Jisung nodded, eyes closed tightly, concentrating on his breathing. It seemed silly to him that he was having this reaction once it was all over and not when he had no idea what the journey might be like. It didn't make sense. And he knew that focusing on how pathetic he felt wouldn't help this attack to end quickly, but he couldn't help it. All the tricks he knew would disappear, his mind a blank, when anxiety began to bubble up in his chest and he wasn't in the comfort of his room, or with one of his members.

‘Listen, you're doing great, okay?’ he heard again, and tried to focus his gaze on her eyes, trying to distinguish where the brown started and the green ended, losing himself in the depths of her pupils, ’but I'm going to need you to breathe with me, yeah? Do you think you can do that?’

Jisung processed her words, frowning at the insistent dizziness he felt swirling in his temples, nodding again. He could do it, he wasn't losing his mind. He had to do it so he could apologise properly. A girl like Noa didn't deserve to have someone like him spoil a nice May afternoon with her friends. So he pretended that the shiver that crept over his skin had been from anxiety and not from her when he felt Noa's hand slide down to rest on his chest.

He also chose to ignore the way Noa touched him, all gentleness and decency, giving him the sweetest of looks, as if she'd done that routine many times before. Anyone with anxiety who had someone to lean on at times like that was very lucky, but having Noa was a gift. She didn't make you feel like a burden, instead she distracted you enough to make you think it was a team effort. That was why his breath caught in his throat when he felt one of Noa's fingers brush against the skin of his chest, unintentionally slipping through the hole between two buttons.

She seemed not to notice, too busy ensuring his well-being, and continued with her rehearsed choreography. She took the hand that hadn't been abused by the trip, grasping him gently by the wrist, and rested it on her own chest, slowly raising it with a breath, urging him to do the same. Jisung closed his eyes, feeling more clearly how smooth the skin of her collarbone was, soft and delicate under his guitarist's fingertips, and forced himself to mimic the calm rise and fall of her chest.

No words were exchanged, none were needed, until Jisung felt sane enough to look at her again. They were only inches apart, arms locked and intertwined, her hands in his, and though he could only hear his heartbeat thudding in his ears, he felt her own mirroing his quick race beneath his fingers.

Noa had beautiful eyes. Not only that, but the smile she offered hid an accomplice that made you want to follow her wherever she wanted to take you, and for a moment, Jisung wanted to. But he couldn't. He was trapped, between the wall and her hands, between the wall and her gaze, and he didn't want to run away. Every second he spent memorising all the intermingled shades of mahogany and forest green in her irises, and when he realised that he hadn't once taken his eyes off hers, he was shocked. Jisung was incapable of holding eye contact for more than a few seconds with anyone.

‘That's my girl, now kiss him!’

The spell broke as soon as Noa processed those words in Spanish, and Jisung's body moved a little closer to hers as she pulled away slightly.

‘He was having a panic attack, you moron,' she whispered, her low, strong tone contrasting with the gentleness of her hands against his skin.

Then Jisung snapped back to reality, his chest rising and falling more calmly, and he located the boy who had spoken. He had been cracking a rascally smile until he had heard the word panic - which was not so different in Spanish than it was in English, Jisung had been able to understand - and now he was approaching with a concerned gesture towards them.

‘Do you need ice? Do you want us to find you somewhere cooler?’ he asked, still in the language he didn't understand, dividing his attention between Noa and Jisung.

‘Use English, please,’ she asked him, leaving warm caresses on the back of Jisung's hands absently, ’he's a foreigner and it's not polite to gossip without him knowing what we're saying.’

Then she turned to him, giving him her full attention again, and said, ‘Remember I mentioned my friends earlier?’

Jisung nodded, remembering every word he had exchanged with Noa.

‘This is Lucas,’ Jisung turned to the boy, who had left a safe distance between them, waiting for instructions from the girl. His hair was disheveled, as if he'd just taken a nap, and all chestnut brown except for an unruly blond highlight in his fringes. ‘Her twin sister is the girl who gets dizzy that I told you about. She also has anxiety, so he asks if you need ice or a cooler place.’

‘Huh, thanks, Lucas..., Noa,’ Jisung's gaze flickered between one and the other, suddenly nervous. He wasn't used to that kind of attention, it made him uncomfortable to a certain extent. ‘I'm better now.’

‘Oh,’ Noa murmured, taking a step back and pulling her arms away from him. Jisung wanted to follow them, to place them back on his body, to keep feeling her touch on him. He repressed it. ‘Of course.’

‘I'm grateful, really,’ he repeated, as if that wasn't enough. Noa's gaze had flashed with pain at his rejection, and Jisung had hated it. ‘But I should go, my friends...’

‘Right, of course,’ she repeated, taking a step backwards, towards Lucas, like two planets orbiting on the same axis. ‘I understand, they must be worried.’

‘I didn't mean to...’

‘Hey, we made a deal,’ she reminded him, forcing a smile onto her rosy lips, ‘we've already gotten off the Stunt. Glad I could be of help.’

The deal was to hold on tight to each other, Jisung thought. And now she was letting him go. That wasn't part of the deal.

‘We could always get the groups together...’ Lucas wanted to propose, resting a hand protectively on Noa's shoulder.

‘Jisung!’

His heart skipped a beat at the sound of his name. Behind Noa and Lucas was Abril, smiling as if her life depended on it, also slightly dishevelled but with the same cheerful vibe that characterised her. She had stood halfway, having recognised his slim figure and his dyed ash-blonde hair, and Lucas had turned around quickly, frowning.

‘You two know this one?’ he'd said, receiving a smack from Noa for continuing to use Spanish, ‘Are you swapping me for him? On my own birthday?’

‘We're not, dummy,’ Abril said, and Jisung found it odd to hear her voice a softer tone, using English to communicate and not the Korean they had spoken in the previous evening. ‘This is the boy I told you about yesterday, Han Jisung.’

‘Ahh,’ pronounced Noa, placing him in her memories, ’the nice guy from Balmain. I hadn't actually caught the name, sorry.’

‘That's okay,’ he said, shrugging, processing that Noa and April knew each other. For a person who wasn't used to Korean culture, understanding how names worked or being able to remember one must have been difficult. For him, their Spanish names were.

‘I still don't get it,’ Lucas interrupted.

‘You were drunk yesterday,’ Abril reminded him, reaching their level and bowing her head slightly in respect. Jisung did the same. ‘You made a terrible joke, let me remember... Oh, jamón serrano. Ham in English. Ham, because of Han. He's one of the members of the group that Carla likes.’

‘Carla is another one of our friends, but she didn't come today,’ Noa informed him.

Lucas made an affirmative noise, indicating that he already remembered, and was about to make a comment about it, searching for the right English words, when another shout was heard from behind him. Again an acquaintance shouting his name. This time his brother. Jisung grimaced, and turned slowly, avoiding making eye contact with him, and turning directly into Felix and his hyung, who were trailing after Jae and relaxed as soon as they spotted him.

‘Hey, hey, hey, hey,’ Lucas exclaimed, stepping protectively between him and the other three, ’do you even know each other?’

Jisung paused for a moment, wondering to whom the question was addressed, but before he could explain who they were, or even gazing at Abril fro help, his brother stepped up to Lucas, facing him, and replied in slurred English, ‘I'd like to know if you know him at all, because he's obviously my little brother.

The tension could be cut with a knife, and Jisung shifted uncomfortably under the incredulous stares of Felix and Chan, who couldn't believe they had just witnessed their manager's words. Jaehyun never let his emotions, and especially anger, spill over into his actions. Never. But before Chan could jump in to try and sort out the misunderstanding, Abril and Noa burst out laughing behind Jisung's back.

‘Lucas, he looks an awful lot like Jisung,’ Noa said, stepping forward with her hands in the pockets of her baggy jeans, her face still holding an almost uncontrollable laughter.

‘It's actually kind of surprising that you didn't notice,’ April chipped in, tilting her head to the side, trying to stifle her smile behind Noa's shoulder.

Jisung saw Lucas blush, mumble an apology to Jae, who accepted it with a nod, and step back so that Jisung could approach his friends. The first to move closer when Jisung was near enough was his brother, putting his arm around his shoulders and asking him in Korean if he was okay. He explained that he hadn't been, but thanks to the girl he'd been sitting next to, he was feeling better now. Noa smiled at hearing her name, and Jisung found himself smiling back, adding that she had been the perfect rollercoaster companion.

‘I'm glad you had someone up there,’ Jaehyun stated, looking up at the ride, which had started up again, and feeling guilty for not getting on with his little brother. ‘Are you going to introduce us to the fashion girl and her friends?’

Jisung blinked, confused, thinking that Jae's next action as manager would be to say goodbye and send them back to the hotel, but he nodded and turned to the three Spaniards.

‘Guys, this is my brother and manager Han Jaehyun,’ he began, resting his hand on the one Jae had on his shoulder, ‘then there's Lee Felix,’ he continued, letting the blonde flash one of his brightest smiles, ‘and Bang Chan hyung, our leader.’ Then he turned to his friends, and prayed that he pronounced the Spanish names correctly. ‘Abril I met yesterday on the catwalk, because she was sitting next to me. Noa was the one who saved me just now, and made me survive Stunt Fall,’ he shared a smile with her and then paused, glancing at the third member of the trio, and finished the introduction, ‘and Lucas, huh, the friend who thinks I'm jam.’

‘Ham,’ he corrected him, ‘Yummy, Spanish ham.’

‘They're the ones on the albums Carla buys,’ Abril explained, turning to Noa and Lucas. ‘Stray Kids, the ones she had saved up for the concert in Madrid and couldn't go to because it was cancelled due to covid.’

Noa nodded, as if she already knew all that information, but Lucas was too busy staring at Chan.

‘Luc, that's creepy,’ Abril said to him. ‘Stop, please.’

Jisung saw Chan blush slightly at the Spaniard's attention, but he didn't say anything. He couldn't tell if he was uncomfortable or nervous, but he knew that Lucas's nonchalant nature was shocking him a little.

‘It's just that he rings a bell, but I can't place him,' he explained.

‘Oh, I know!’ exclaimed Noa. ‘It's from the Korean reggaeton music video! He's the one who plays the bodyguard!’

‘Korean reggaeton?’ asked Chan, confused.

‘Maknae on top’ replied Abril, and their leader raised her eyebrows in understanding. ‘Carla, our Stay friend, teaches them Kpop songs if they say things is Spanish or have a Latin beat.’

‘But Lucas recognises Chan because there was a time when you kept playing the video over and over,’ Noa informed, smiling half-sideways, waiting for Abril's poorly suppressed alarmed cry at being exposed.

‘I'm a Seventeen fan, shush,’ she confessed. ‘Besides, they sure don't like talking about this stuff.’

‘Oh, we like knowing that people enjoy our songs, don't worry,’ Felix said, smiling, enjoying the chaos. ‘I'm the one who says ‘Felix Navidad’ in a song called Christmas Evel.’

‘And your name is Felix,’ Lucas spoke, letting out a laugh, ’It’s genius, I love it.’

‘Jisung and Chan are the ones who compose and produce all their songs,’ Abril added.

‘And Changbin,’ Jisung added.

‘And Changbin,’ Abril repeated, apologising with a smile.

‘Oh my God, enough with the work talk,' Noa interrupted, stretching her arms and rotating her wrists, as if standing still for too long bothered her. ‘Do you want us to show you around? We can even go back to Madrid, if you want.’

The three of them looked at Jaehyun automatically, as if waiting for an answer, and he tried to keep a straight face, crumbling the moment Felix tugged at his shirt sleeve, taking advantage of the effect of his adorable pout. Jae shrugged, deflating like a balloon as he exhaled a tired sigh, and Chan put a hand on his shoulder comfortingly.

‘You know what the limits are,’ he said, in Korean, looking at Jisung, as if he were to blame for everyone's enthusiasm. ‘And that you don't know these people. They can be fans, they can be stalkers.’

‘Han-nim, if I may,’ Abril interrupted in her soft Korean voice, approaching slowly and timidly, as if she didn't want to get Jisung in trouble. ‘It's true that I'm a fan of your work and I know the Kpop world, but we're not sasaengs. I can give you my word, and speak on behalf of my friends, we simply want to leave a good impression of your first visit to Spain. If you don't trust me, I can show you the content I do on my social networks, and Noa's, even tell you what the rest of them are doing or documentation that certifies that everything I've said is true. Nothing proposed is with bad intentions, we just want to have a good time because Jisung is a wonderful person and I would like to share my time with him and let him meet my friends.’

Jaehyun stared at Abril for a good time, a battle of hard, unmoving brown gazes between the older brother and the Spaniard, who was also an older sister, and then held out his hand.

‘I'm going to need you to sign confidentiality contracts, but it works for me,’ he pronounced slowly, his chest warming at the joy gradually visible on Jisung's face. ‘You're a sincere and kind girl, I respect and admire that.’

‘Thank you very much,’ she replied, accepting the compliment with a bow.

Felix hugged Jisung, excited, but Jisung waited to see the way Noa's eyes lit up when Abril translated her and Lucas what she had just spoken to his brother in his own language. He liked Noa. He liked the way the corners of her eyes crinkled when she smiled, and the soft curve of her arms when she held them close to her body. He liked the tendency she had to rotate her knees and wrists from time to time, or the mischievous turn her smile took when you least expected it. And he liked knowing that there were still a lot of details about her to discover.

Lucas whistled, drawing everyone's attention, and said, ‘I'm guessing the manager's going to need three more NDAs.’

Jisung turned, and saw three more people approaching. He assumed they were more of Noa's friends, and she confirmed it as soon as she noticed Jisung's questioning glance at her. One of the girls was undoubtedly Lucas' twin, with blonde hair falling down her back and the same grin. The only boy, also blond, had tattooed arms, and was pacing a step behind them, lost in thought. The other girl, approaching with a phone in her hand, and the terrifying look of an angry mother, was a Latina in a pretty sundress. And she was the first to open her mouth.

‘Oh, you must be so full of yourselves!’ she exclaimed, in Spanish, not realising that there were more people with them. ‘Get off the Stunt, disappear and then give no sign of life! I don't know what you want the phone for! You always have it in your hand but you never use it when you actually have to use it!’

The blond boy at her back cleared his throat slyly, and the soft noise seemed to snap the angry Latina out of her mindset. She interrupted herself, almost swallowing all the words she had been about to blurt out, and looked up at Jisung, her gaze softening instantly and curving her lips in a welcoming gesture.

‘Sorry, I didn't see you.’

‘In English, Nea.’ pointed out Lucas, voice still, knowing when to goof off, picking his battles wisely.

‘Oh, in English then,’ she repeated, switching languages. ‘Sorry about the show. It's just that they disappeared and we couldn't find them.’

‘That's all right,’ Chan pronounced, before anyone could say anything.

‘Who... are you guys?’ she asked, and Jisung knew the mom attitude wasn't a facade, because all her friends seemed to gather around her like chicks chasing their mama duck.

‘Jisung,’ Noa began, ‘the boy Abril met yesterday, sat next to me in the Stunt because they were uneven. Chan and Felix, along with him, part of a Kpop group, and Jaehyun,’ she paused looking at Jisung's brother, waiting for his approval so she knew she had pronounced it right, ‘is his manager. And Sung's older brother.’

‘Oh,’ said the blonde girl, still sheltering next to her twin brother, ‘welcome to Spain.’

‘She is Isabel,’ introduced the Latina, stepping forward and indicating with her hand the names of the newcomers, 'my name is Atenea, and this is Miguel.’ The tattooed boy waved his fingers in greeting, then folded his arms and stood behind Atenea, as she clapped her hands in the air. ‘I'm sure you'll have time to memorise them all. Any friend of my girls is a friend of ours, and that means you are already part of the group. I assume you've invited them to show them around town, right?’

Noa nodded, and Atenea smiled softly at her.

‘I can take care of talking paperwork with the manager while you tell them about the twins' birthday plans, in case they want to join,’ she told Noa, and Jisung smiled when he saw her and Abril give each other a sneaky high-five. If their group dynamic was even the slightest bit like theirs, he knew his older brother and Chan would consider her an equal. She was the force keeping all her menaces in check.

‘I know a food stand that is perfect to grab something to get over the Stunt Fall impression,’ Lucas said, starting to walk, Abril after him, and waited for Noa and Jisung to follow. ‘Your friend Felix is still a little pale.’

Jisung smiled, knowing that his sunshine twin would appreciate a sweet drink to recover from the faint, and also the nice detail from the Spaniard. He took a quick glance back, checking that Chan had found a spot next to Atenea, and that Jae was trying to communicate with Miguel ーit seemed that neither of them knew much English. Felix, who was indeed still a bit pale, had approached Isabel, who had fallen a bit behind, and had just whispered, ‘Happy birthday.’

He could get used to it.

#﹙ ★ ﹚ mars — writes.#stray kids fluff #stray kids x reader #skz x reader #han jisung #han jisung x reader #han jisung imagines #han jisung fluff

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