#the home I want isn’t real

[lunarsyskids]

Hear yellin outside :( dunno who hate living in apartment hear yelling triggering especial when it muffled bc remind us of hiding in room

Hav chair against door hope no one tries come in. People would always come in when we were young. Never could stop them. Locks got broken n no chair stayed under stupid door knob. Always burst in hurt us scare us embarrass us never got chance b alone

So scared feel sick

[stagefoureddiediaz]

I’ve been pondering on why everyone is so attached to burning down bucks loft and the Diaz house being this amazing place that needs to be there when Eddie and Chris return to LA from El Paso.

I personally think that’s really bad idea and a rather cruel punishment to subject Chris and Eddie (and Buck as well!) to.

Because that house is actually cursed and doesn’t really have that many great memories/ scenes attached to it.

Bucks loft is actually a far more positive place than the diaz house is.

Think about it - the only negatives the loft has got attached to it is the Tommy break up, Taylor living there (although I would argue that not pall of that was bad - it taught Buck a lot and got him to break off a bad relationship) the sperm donor baby (I guess if you want to view it as a negative - im kinda on the fence with it tbh as I think buck still views it as a good thing he did!) and technically an association with bucks death as part of his coma dream took place there (but again that was a positive part of his coma dream).

There are a huge number of positive and important developments attached to the loft - that far outweigh the negatives - it’s the place Chris views as a safe space - he ran there to Buck and has spent a lot of time 1:1 with Buck and a lot of them Buckley-Diaz family unit development has been in the loft - including post tsunami. It’s where most of the big buck and Eddie conversations have happened. It’s where buck figured out he was bi.

Meanwhile the diaz house is very much connected to Eddie’s breakdown, Shannon reappearing and then leaving and dying, her ghost is ever present in the house. It’s connected to Kim and that is the biggest tarnishing factor for Chris - why would he ever want to return to a house that made him think his mom was alive again and broke the comfort and safety he felt in that space? Not to mention the Ana of it all and the moving Marisol in and out, and then there’s Eddie’s breakdown and the shooting is connected to that house because Chris had to deal with his dad not coming home that night, he also had to stay there without his dad during lockdown. The moments of joy or positivity in the house are far rarer and smaller when they have happened - small family building moments like buck and Chris playing computer games or doing homework etc.

So why would we want the Diaz boys to return to that house? Why would we want Buck to move in there? I personally am of the opinion that the loft is a good landing place for their return because it’s been a safe space for both Chris and Eddie, with a view to them finding a new house - one where they can all start a fresh and build a new life without any of the baggage of the Diaz house and with the proper space for a family to build a life together in (because the loft is not that - not by a long way - but it is good to be a temporary return spot!).

So yeah I’m very much on team Diaz couch is the couch, but very much not part of team Diaz house being the house we should be sad about saying goodbye to!

[wildsaltair]

Ranting in the tags isn’t enough so I’m going to say one more time that just because Maximus isn’t morally gray doesn’t mean he isn’t complex

[shorthaltsjester]

being a huge fan of tlou but also like. thinking that certain stories are built for certain mediums. like the entire theme of tlou2 is grounded and fresh because it’s a railroad/story video game that still affords you mechanical choices in how you navigate the world. i just don’t have a lot of confidence that presenting that story in a tv show with the minimal adjustments that they did in s1 will be fulfilling or compelling in any comparable way. because with tlou1 some of the like. beauty of that story was simply that it was such an emotive story contained in the medium of video games. and some of that was retained just by hitting similar or expanded emotional beats in the show, like the episodes that expanded on the life of the characters and the realities of that world. but truly so much of tlou2 emotional depth and ‘why does this story matter’ rests in the fact that’s it’s your hands on the controller, continually choosing to go forward in the story and have hope that it will work out in your-as-ellie-or-abby-or-somehow-booth’s favour. and you simply cannot get that in a non-interactive medium like television. like i do think tlou2 is a good story but it’s a good story because of the investment required by the player to keep pressing buttons and keep returning and to feel the adrenaline like responses of high intensity moments and be jarringly shifted into backstories that only increase the frustration. in general i’ve been thinking a lot about cross-medium adaptation and on the one hand i am glad that season 1 makes the story of the last of us more accessible to people who wouldn’t pick up a video game but it’s also like. maybe instead we can destigmatize video games as this inaccessible and dangerous medium a bit more instead of just . implicitly agreeing . like no maybe your mom won’t pick up a video game controller and play the last of us . but maybe you can play the game in the living room. sometimes the mediums that stories are told in aren’t just important but are actually foundational parts of how the information of a story is conveyed and that’s not only okay but is fucking fantastic. we should be happy actually that there are so many ways to collect a bunch of themes and ideas and put them together and hold them out to someone else and say “won’t you consider this with me. won’t you feel these emotions and care about these characters with me.”

[clancyycat]

anyone who is of the praying/sending good vibes sort will you keep my mama in mind tomorrow please? she is having outpatient surgery for a hernia and it’s minor and chill and her two childhood best friends are gonna be taking care of her but i will not be there and im an anxious wreck

[jitteryjive]

i need to remake my cup bros ref… both cup and human designs… it’s been almost a year(?) and i’ve developed the headcanons and i would like to share with the class!!! (i wrote thirty tags. Please help me)

[butnotbubblegum]

using the tags to vent my current emotional state into the void bc ig story feels like a bad plan for this, read at your own risk.

[quietwingsinthesky]

i know it’s just because control is my favorite video game BUT. to me, the bunker should be alive. a barely controlled, shifting mass of tunnels and doors and rooms that the Men of Letters found and chained down with the strongest magic they had at hand, tied lobotomized spirits to the halls to run and protect it and put cracks in the foundation to fill with their own blood so that “legacies” were safe to traverse it.

[thats-my-passion-right-there]

I finally saw the mean girls musical (the movie one) I have so many fucking thoughts oh my god

[arrowfleur]

In between sets right now and the only thing getting me through these hip thrusts is remembering Sam Collins is an ass man

[eversncenewyork]

oh well

[ceramicbeetle]

realizing that it sounds kind of mean for me to be referring to this fic as the “cringe loser” fic if you don’t have the extensive lexicon i’ve created in my head for the lengthy opinion essay i haven’t written about how most people don’t actually want “good” autist-rep, they want “cool” rep even at the expense of ‘accuracy’. just believe me i say “cringe loser” with the highest degree of absolute affection

[merevide]

thinking about killing eve again. thinking about eve. and her inhabitions and how she was so repressed and unfulfilled and her only true escape from that was her extensive research into female assassins and through that and getting fired and then rehired she meets villanelle and they basically bring out the worst in each other obvi but that’s also kinda their best selves because all villanelle wants is to be understood and that’s also what eve wants but she denies and denies and denies and she basically keeps denying everything until it’s too late and she’s left alone, again, screaming out in the water.

[freckleslikestars]

Genuinely don’t understand people going ‘I like this character but they’ve done a bad thing so now I don’t like them’

Like. What? You want your favourites to be perfect and unblemished? What’s interesting about that?! What’s compelling about that?!

Also just. People don’t work like that. People do bad things and they have ulterior motives and they make mistakes and 9 times out of 10 that’s okay because most people aren’t good or evil, they’re just people. They’re just existing and trying to survive and nobody’s perfect. And to see fictional characters allowed to make those same mistakes is both fascinatingly beautiful and a reminder that it’s okay to fuck up.

[pierregaslays]

i miss my mum

[hobisexually]

long winded rant in the tags coming that’s partly about weight but in a very unfiltered sad way so if that triggers you do Not read on