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augustjoy · 4 months ago

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I’ve got you!

Based on the following ask: I want fluffy romance

It’s an Aaron Hotchner x reader (lmao daddy issues on fleek) anyways

I’d like to see like romantic tension building between them like it begins small but slowly gets bigger and it isn’t until reader gets into trouble (like say almost drowning because she never learned how to swim like my dumbass) that Aaron almost loses it a little and saved reader which makes him end up confessing to each other and they get together and it’s just fluffy romance because as much as I love the smutty stuff, I crave fluff so badly for my poor heart and for Aaron because baby deserves comfort too. Anyways Love you gorgeous

Aaron Hotchner x BAU! Fem Reader

Angst/Fluff

Word count: 2533

REQUESTS ARE OPEN - not edited - please be kind. Requests are open and feedback is welcome if it's constructive!

Warnings: My blog is 18+, minors DNI, SLOW BURN, Age gap (non-specified), some explicit language, reader can’t swim, no use of y/n, Fem reader, reader has no physical description, canon typical violence, reader almost drowns, mention of Jack, Beth never existed in this okay!, mention of hospitals, team calls reader flower as a nickname! let me know if I missed any!

I do not consent to having my work translated or reposted to any other site. That being said I do not own the characters portrayed in this story.

Your first impression of Aaron Hotchner was at a lecture at your university. Jason Gideon had been leading the BAU and Hotch had just been an agent at the time, but you had been captivated by his intelligence and the way he carried himself. He was so confident and had this strength about him that drew you in. Not in a romantic way though!

At least that’s what you told yourself.

Aaron’s first impression of you was when you had been hired onto the team through Director Cruz. Mateo had brought you along with your file and handed you off to Aaron, informing him that you’d be joining the BAU effective immediately.

Initially Aaron was annoyed, this kind of thing hadn’t always worked out in his favor, having agents assigned to his team without his approval but, looking at you and your impressive file, he knew he had to give you a shot.

Glancing over to you he took note of your beauty. It wasn’t the obvious fake filter-like beauty, but something more natural. You had this air of warmth that radiated off of you, it was the type of energy that just made you feel comfortable around someone. He couldn’t help but think that if he’d met you some other way, that maybe he’d have asked you out.

Things between you and Aaron had progressed organically. The two of you had grown pretty close, being one another’s confidant within the team. You weren’t together, but the amount of time you two spent together suggested otherwise.

It all happened pretty quickly.

“Does Hotch always stay late?” You asked.

“Uh, yeah pretty much.” Emily laughed.

“What about Jack? He doesn’t go home to be with him? I mean…I, that came out wrong. I didn’t mean that to sound judgy, I just meant like doesn’t he want to go home?” You stuttered.

“I’m sure he wants to go home to Jack. His sister-in-law watches Jack when he can’t, but since Strauss died, they gave Hotch a lot of additional responsibilities for this team. Things that Cruz never took back on, so he has nearly double the workload now that he did back then.” Derek explained.

You stood there stunned to silence as the others packed their bags to head home for the evening. You hadn’t even noticed them making their way to the elevator.

“Aren’t you coming?” JJ questioned.

“You know, I just remembered I forgot to get the file for that case we had in Minnesota back to Hotch. He’ll be pissed if I don’t turn it in before our days off.” You lied.

“Do you want us to wait?” Spencer asked.

“No, you guys go ahead! Enjoy your weekend!”

You sat back down at your desk, attempting to make yourself look busy while the other piled into the elevator. Once the doors had closed you made your way up to his office…unable to hear the others…

“She’s got it bad.” Derek teased.

“So does he.” Rossi confirmed.

You gently knocked on his office door and waited for him to permit your entry. Once he did, you pushed the door open slightly and peaked in, waiting for him to acknowledge your presence.

“Oh hey, what are you still doing here? I figured you’d have left with the others.” Aaron let a slight smile slip past his lips.

“I was going to, but you’re still here. It didn’t feel right going home for the weekend while you are still here working your ass off.”

“I’m the boss, I’m always here working my ass off. Head home, enjoy the time off. Seriously.” Aaron suggested.

“How about instead, I do whatever I can to help you get through your work a little faster and I order dinner for us. Would you prefer tacos or Thai food?” You pulled up your maps app to see restaurants that were nearby.

“You should-”

“Don’t even try to argue with me Hotch.” You threatened.

“Tacos.”

“Perfect.”

That night you helped Aaron double-check the case reports and cross reference them to make sure they were all filed properly. It allowed him some extra time to complete some administrative work and when your food arrived, the two of you sat and laughed while enjoying your tacos.

Garcia, Emily, and JJ were all clutching their temples while chugging down coffee in hopes to alleviate their hangovers.

Spencer and Derek couldn’t help but chuckle at the girls and the fact that they chose to drink far too much last night, knowing full well they’d need to be up early to cheer on their fearless leader as he completed the annual FBI triathlon.

Dave waved to the others notifying them that he could see Aaron coming around the last corner.

“Wait where’s flower at?” Derek asked.

The team looked around to see if they could spot you, knowing that you would never miss this, given how close you and Aaron had become. Dave chuckled to himself and pointed over to where you were standing with Jack on your shoulders as he held up a large glittering sign.

Everyone cheered as Aaron crossed the finish line only, he didn’t stop to greet the team. He made his was straight to you and Jack, he assisted him in getting down off your shoulders and complimented the beautiful poster he had made.

“I had some help!” Jack replied, gently grabbing your hand.

You’d smile and wish Aaron a job well done.

The team would just watch from afar and wonder how the two of you could be so incredibly oblivious to the love you so obviously shared for one another.

“Wooo go Jack!” You cheered.

Aaron couldn’t help but chuckle at you, genuinely loving the bond you’d established with his son. It had started when Jack needed to spend a day at the BAU and you’d gone out of your way to get him snacks and print a few coloring pages for him. It had shifted to something deeper than that not long after. Jack would ask if you could come to the park with them or if you could help him with the poster for his dad or, like today for instance, if you could come to his soccer game.

You had packed up a cooler bag full of drinks and snacks for the three of you. Dressed in a simple T-shirt and jeans, Aaron had never thought you looked better. You’d been so casual and comfortable, and when you hopped in the passenger seat of his car that morning something stirred in Aaron. A feeling he wasn’t sure he was ready to feel again, let alone give in to.

“Did you see that? I made a goal!” Jack hollered running over to your waiting embrace.

“I did buddy, you were incredible out there!” You praised.

“Dad, can we all go get lunch now? And maybe then we can go see the new spiderman movie?” Jack pleaded.

“Oh – bud I don’t, I uh. I’m not sure that’s a good –” Aaron fumbled.

“I would love to, as long as it’s not an imposition.” You smiled.

“It’s not! An imposition, I mean.” Aaron clarified.

“Well then! What do you want for lunch Jack?” You asked.

You’d spent the rest of the day with the Hotchner boys, going to lunch and then seeing a movie. Which led to you offering to make them dinner, and building Legos with Jack, and then a nightcap with Aaron. He’d offered you his guestroom and then to drive you home first thing and given that you were both tipsy…you were quick to agree.

What you hadn’t expected was breakfast. He and Jack had gone all out with chocolate chip pancakes…things were feeling a little too domestic. When had things gotten so comfortable?

As the feeling stirred in both you and Aaron, you had begun to notice all the little things you did for one another. Things that had just become natural for you both in the time you’d known each other, second nature at this point.

You always slid sticky notes in your case files before turning them in to him. Sometimes they’d contain a doodle of something silly or a quote you’d read somewhere that made you think of him. What you didn’t know is he saved them all. They were tucked away in the back of his desk drawer, a neat pile of multicolored paper, serving as a reminder of how happy you made him.

Aaron shared similar antics…only his served in the form of your favorite tea, left on your desk each morning before the others arrived so they wouldn’t know it was him placing it there. Though they all had their suspicions anyway. Every once in while…usually after tough cases, or if he knew you hadn’t eaten dinner – which he’d know because you’d fall asleep mid-conversation via text – he’d leave a chocolate croissant…your favorite.

Aaron had almost let his feelings slip once. Dave had caught the internal battle that Aaron was facing, he wore it as a pained expression and tense shoulders. Dave had reassured him that you were alright and there was no need to worry, only that didn’t help much. You had gotten hurt, and that only proved that it could happen again. This was a dangerous job full of pain and suffering. Aaron realized he couldn’t bear the thought of you getting hurt.

You had been away on a case; the team had found the unsub and were closing in on him. You had rounded a corner in your chase and came face to face with the man you were after, and he had gotten the upper hand. He’d gotten a few good punches in and knocked you on your ass. Aaron had been quick to return the favor once he caught up.

That is when this need to protect you had grown all consuming. Aaron decided then to offer to train with you, in the hope of improving your self-defense skills a little more. And that is where you found yourself on Thursday evenings. Aaron and you would go to the FBI gym and train for about an hour before going to dinner.

This tradition sort of kept going…it sort of progressed from self-defense training to just working out together. An excuse really, an easy way of spending more time together without it looking too suspicious.

Dave had pushed Aaron time and time again, practically begging him to ask you out once and for all. To which Aaron always had the same reply; “She doesn’t feel that way about me and even if she did, it wouldn’t be appropriate”.

“You must be blind if you don’t see how much she cares about you. Or perhaps I was wrong about you being such a skilled profiler.” Dave chided.

“Excuse me?” Aaron was stunned.

“She is in love with you Aaron. You’d have to be an idiot to not realize, and even worse to keep yourselves from the happiness you both deserve.” Dave scolded.

Aaron sat with that for some time…wondering if Dave was right. Maybe enough was enough.

This case started out fine…but would quickly become both yours and Aaron’s worst nightmare.

This particular unsub had been murdering people with seemingly no connection. Disposing of their bodies at the South Coast Shipyard in Newport Beach, California.

The team had been working for days, trying to catch this guy. He was meticulous and stuck to his MO, not straying from his routine even the slightest. Spencer had suggested that he might have OCD.

That is what led you guys to the shipyard to try and corner him. Catch him in the act. You’d been on edge about being so close to the water…truthfully you’d always been afraid of it. And one night in a drunken stupor, you’d let it slip to Aaron that you’d never learned how to swim.

So, when Derek shouted out that you were FBI and Mathias Edwards took off running, you’d been a little nervous to chase after him. You’d do your job as expected…but there was a sick feeling in your stomach as you sprinted on the creaky dock.

It was just you Derek and Aaron at the docks, you had been checking things out, knowing that he’d likely be scoping out the area to see what boats were docked so he could find his next dumpsite. You hadn’t expected him to be there so early.

The three of you had split up, chasing after Mathias. You, thanks to all the training with Aaron, were quick on your feet, catching up with him quickly. You were running down a long straight on the docks, carefully avoiding any rope or ties holding boats in place when Mathias jumped out from between two boats, shoving you full force backward into the water. You’d immediately screamed, flailing your arms in a desperate attempt to stay above the surface.

Derek had been coming from the other direction and was able to tackle Mathias and was working to get him in cuffs. It wasn’t until Aaron came around that Derek even knew something was wrong.

“Where is she?” Aaron shouted. “Flower, where is she?”

Derek stood up, pulling Mathias to his feet and shoving him in the direction of the SUV. “Mathias pushed her into the water, I figured she’d swim around to the ladder at the end of the dock.”

“She can’t swim!” Aaron panicked, wasting no time jumping in the water to find you.

Moving swiftly, Derek secured the unsub in the SUV before running back to help Aaron get you out of the water. He’d found you quickly dragging you by your arm to the surface and lifting you into Derek’s waiting hands.

He’d checked for your pulse and when he couldn’t feel it, he began chest compressions. Aaron heaved himself out of the water and back on to the dock and pressed his ear to your chest to listen for any kind of breath sounds.

“Go call for a bus!” Aaron commanded.

Aaron took over CPR and leaned down to listen for your heartbeat once more. When he again heard nothing, he attempted mouth-to-mouth. He continued on like this for a few more seconds before you lurched forward, sputtering up the water that had entered your airways. Aaron helped you sit up and pulled you into his embrace.

“Oh, thank God.” Aaron muttered. “I’ve got you sweetheart.”

You were taken by ambulance to the nearest hospital. They wanted to check your vitals and run a few tests to make sure you were alright. Aaron had insisted on riding along with you and held your hand the entire way. He was by your side the whole time.

“You can’t do that to me.” He whispered.

“What?” You rasped.

“You can’t scare me like that sweetheart. I don’t know what I’d do if we lost you.” His eyes brimmed with tears.

“The team would be okay.”

“Not them. Me and Jack. We can’t lose you baby. We need you; Jack loves you, hell, I love you too much, I don’t think my heart could take it.” You were both crying now.

“I love you too.”

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sierrale8ne · 5 months ago

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christmas eve aubrey griffin, ayanna patterson, paige bueckers 🎄

sfw // kissing, sexual innuendos, cute christmas fluff

kalena speakss 🪽! i recommend having this song on loop while reading, it really works wonders on the heart strings 🥹 merry (early) christmas eve and happy holidays to all my amazing followers and moots.

🏷️ @thaatdigitaldiary @bueckersbitch @pboogerswbb @xxloveralways14 @ohbueckers @rosemariiaa @bucketbueckers @janaelalfysblunt @tndaqlifwy

ayanna and kelli’s christmas eve 🎞️

“Lay your head on me, I got you baby.” justin bieber 2011

“I can’t believe you made me put these on.” Ayanna groans, walking down the stairwell of my parents home in plaid pajama pants and a red, ugly, Christmas sweater with gingerbread men on it.

She looks adorable, her skin glowing from the light of the fireplace and the television.

“I didn’t make you do anything. You have free will.” I shrug from my place on the couch. White fuzzy socks cover my feet as I tuck my legs up on the couch. It’s barely even chilly, but the holiday spirit makes me pile on all the layers.

“Kel, this shit is ugly.”

“You wanna take it off?” I comment, looking over at her suggestively.

“In your parent’s house? Nah, I’ll be aight.” Yanna looks at me astonished, pulling on the tight coil that falls over her forehead. She huffs, sitting next to me on the couch.

“That’s what I thought.” I reply, pressing play on the movie in front of us.

It’s Are We There Yet, which I refuse to accept as a Christmas movie, but since Yanna sucked it up and put on the matching outfit, I guess I can be a good girlfriend and watch her poor choice of a movie.

She pulls on the lever that makes the seat recline, giving me all the space to get comfortable in the space between us as we cuddle.

“I missed you so damn much, pretty. You don’t even know”

I’m taken aback by her sudden show of affection, but it makes me smile. And that pretty word nearly makes my cheek turn as read as the sweaters.

“Me too.” I nod, looking away from Nia Long on the screen and up at my girlfriend. “The team was getting too comfortable with my baby. Needed you to come back.”

Yanna laughs in between kissing my forehead. “I thought I was getting replaced by med school exams.” She says back.

I really didn’t realize just how much we’d been busy. UConn and Harvard weren’t too far away, the distance could’ve been worse. But from chasing a national championship and trying to become a doctor, her and I just had so much going on.

It’s really a Christmas miracle that I get her all to myself for a few days.

“Y’sure I can’t give you my gift tonight?” Yanna asks me. I laugh, pausing the movie that obviously neither one of us was paying attention to anymore.

“Girl, no!” I exclaimed.

“Please! I’ll give you another tomorrow.” She attempts to negotiate. I want to say no, knowing that if my mom were to hear that I’ve changed her very serious Christmas plans, she’d probably kill me.

But it’s Ayanna, and she looks so convincing with that pretty and perfect smile that I just can’t say no.

Which is exactly how I find myself with my legs crossed, giggling as she hands me the medium sized Tiffany & Co box. It isn’t wrapped, which lets me know she was planning on giving it to me when we were alone rather than when our families were around.

“NIL money getting you right?”

Yanna grins at me as she shrugs. Trying to look nonchalant about it, but I know her better than that.

“Something like that.”

I untied the white ribbon on the box, revealing the gold Tiffany Hardware Wrap Necklace that I had saved in my phone for months.

“Were you in my search history?” I ask, incredulously, looking at her astonished. “It’s beautiful.” I pout, tears rimming my cheeks from the gesture.

"I needed some inspiration for your gift because you always say you have everything you need and not what you want," Yanna explains, cutely rubbing the back of her neck.

"I do have everything I need and want," I smile. I put the lid back on the box, holding it close to my chest as I lean into her.

My arm wraps around her neck, inhaling the scent of her body wash. Her lips press to my clothed shoulder, hugging me back like any second I could evaporate into thin air.

"I have you," I mumble almost inaudibly, but knowing her she obviously hears me. I hear a small laugh escaping her lips, breathless nearly.

“You got me, baby.” She confirms, kissing that spot on my shoulder again. “Always.”

aubrey and shayne’s christmas eve 🍪

“You leave some cookies out I’ma eat ‘em all.” justin bieber 2011

“Stop it!” Shayne exclaims, swatting Aubrey’s hand away from the recently decorated sugar cookie she just placed down.

It was the couple’s second christmas together, and this time Shayne insisted that they had to decorate cookies on Christmas eve.

Making them was messy, flour and sugar all over the kitchen counter. Then as soon as they were out of the oven, Aubrey went out of her way to reach for a piping hot cookie, just to end up burning her finger and crying like a baby.

“I just wanna see your work!” Aubrey explains, pushing the girl off to the side by her hip. She looks at the cookie, a snowman with a big top hat, and she snickers. “Why are his eyes melting?”

Shayne rolls her eyes at the loud laugh that escapes her girlfriend. “Then you make one! Here.” She says, placing a similar cookie on a plate.

The two hum along to the christmas tune playing on the TV, sugar and cinnamon and vanilla shifts through the air, along with the occasional poking fun of each other’s cookies.

“See, mine looks good.” Aubrey says lifting her gingerbread man up towards her face.

Shayne pulls a face, and every bone in her body is telling her to tell the girl how ugly her cookie looks or something of that nature. But she was right, it actually looked cute.

“It does, baby. Hol’ on let me get a picture of it.” She digs in the pocket of her christmas tree pajamas for her phone. It took all of five seconds for Aubrey to take a giant bite of the head of the gingerbread man. “Are you serious?”

“It was too tempting.” Aubrey explains, crumbs fall from her mouth and green frosting decorates her lip.

“You could wait two more seconds?” Shayne laughs, snapping a photo of the girl’s off-guard face with her decapitated gingerbread man.

She shakes her head back and forth, the curls on her head moving with. “Shouldn’t have left me alone with these cookies.” Aubrey shrugs, eating the rest of it.

“C’mere.”

“What?”

Shayne drops the bag of colored frosting on the counter taking a step closer to her girlfriend. Aubrey had this glimmer in her brown eyes that made her knees knock. Tracing the slope of her nose with her eyes and the sharp line of Aubrey’s jaw.

Shayne’s hand meets Aubrey’s cheek before nudging the corner of her lip with her thumb. “You have frosting on you, dummy.” She sucks the bright green frosting off of her finger, before mushing Aubrey’s face to the side.

“Wait, wait.” Aubrey urged. Her hand reaching for her girlfriend’s wrist and pulling her back.

She slides her hand behind her neck and pulls Shayne into a kiss. Lips softly meshing together as her mouth sucks at Shayne’s bottom lip. They hum as they pull apart, frosting from Aubrey’s mouth staining their lips.

“I like spending Christmas with you, Shay.” Aubrey admits, kissing the girl’s temple.

The admission makes Shayne smile like a school girl and she snakes her arms around Aubrey’s waist, the material of her button up pjs riding up just barely.

“Same time next year?”

“Absolutely.” Aubrey nods eagerly, dipping her head to plant kisses across Shayne’s jaw. “Y’know what else I think?”

“What?” She sighs, slowly getting distracted by the feeling of her lips.

“You should let me eat another cookie before we go to bed. Know what I mean?”

Shayne snickers at the insinuation, pushing her hands to the athletes chest. “And this is when I walk away from you.”

“Shay, c’mon!”

paige and jolene’s christmas eve 🎄

“Kissing underneath the tree. I don’t need no presents girl, you’re everything I need.” justin bieber 2011

“Ma, c’mere!” I call out, stand in front of Jo and I’s tree with my hands on my hips. The pines were decorated in white lights and gold ornaments, Jolene put on some candy canes on it too.

She trudged into the room, her thick socks softly padding against the ground with each step she takes. She wears a plaid onesie, her recently straightened hair tumbling down her shoulders.

“Hmm?”

“I wanted to show you sum.” I reach my hand out for her and she takes it, stepping over the stack of our presents and over to me.

Confusion covers her face, I can assume she’s regretting leaving me alone in the living room with our tree. “Should I be nervous?” Jo laughs, pushing her hair behind her ear. “You know I don’t do surprises.”

“I know.” I nod. She hates surprises, mostly stemming from her hatred for being left out of the loop. “It’s not anything major, I just want to get all sappy and shit.”

She smiles that addicting smile of hers that makes my whole body feel like it’s on fire. I almost forget how long we’ve really been together when she looks at me like that, because every time it feels like I just met her when It’s really been years.

She drops our hands, instead wrapping an arm around my waist and leaning on my shoulder. “Show me.”

I reach behind the tree, looking for and spotting the sphere shaped ornament. It’s clear, a collage of images of the two of us filling the space.

Jolene lets out a gasp as she looks at it, and I remind myself to tap myself on the back for my unofficial gift to her.

“I’ve spent every Christmas with you since we were in eighth grade.” I say, letting the ornament spin on my finger for her to see every image. “It’s crazy, ‘cause we grown as hell now.”

She laughs, “yeah, super senior.”

“Chill out. I’m getting sentimental.”

“You’re right, my fault.”

I point a a random picture before looking at it. “This was my first Christmas in D.C. You flew all the way out there to see me, and I remember telling my dad that I thought our Christmas streak would be broken and then you showed up.”

“I’ll always show up.” She murmurs, following my finger with her eyes.

“Then there’s last year in Minnesota. When we got snowed in, but I swore I wasn’t gonna go without spending my day with you.” The memory flashes in my head of how hard she laughed when she opened her front door and saw my body completely engulfed in snow.

“You walked two and a half blocks for me.” She reminisces along with me before taking it into her own hands.

“I guess what I wanna say is that, I can’t imagine not spending the holidays with you, Jo. This ornament represents all the Christmases of the past, and I wanna keep doing it ‘til I’m fucking 90.”

“And what happens at 91?” She asks. Jolene takes it upon herself to hang it up on the perfect spot, conveniently right where there was a gap between the other ornaments.

“I might be able to go a few more years after that.” I shrug. “You’re my gift every year. Ion need shit else as long as I have you. You’re everything I need every single year.” I admit.

Her smile illuminates in the lighting of the Christmas tree and she cups my cheeks, pulling me down to her height and kissing me without any more words. There didn’t really need to be anymore words, everything that was left unsaid was understood.

It’s so damn tender, soft and sweet like I’ve never felt before. Even after nine years of being able to call her my girlfriend. She licks at my bottom lip, parting them before slipping it into my mouth.

“‘M gonna marry you one day.” She mumbles into my mouth, and I nod, gripping her hips in an attempt to keep us both from falling into the tree.

I pull back, but not before placing another slow peck to her lips. “I love you, Jo.”

“I love you too, 5. Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas, mama.”

#sierrale8ne #kalena’s works ୧ ‧₊˚ 🍵 ⋅#paige bueckers #paige bueckers x oc #aubrey griffin #aubrey griffin x oc #ayanna patterson #ayanna patterson x oc #uconn wbb #lesbian

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storiesforallfandoms · 7 months ago

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making amends ~ bucky barnes;marvel

word count: 2528

request?: no

description: in which she finds out that their three year relationship started by him trying to make amends for his brainwashed past

pairing: bucky barnes x female!reader

warnings: swearing, angsty angst, use of y/n, mentions of bucky’s winter soldier past, mentions of an incident that left the reader in critical condition

masterlist (one, two, three)

(Y/N) placed the basket of clothes on her and Bucky’s bed. Bucky was away, and she had the day off, so she decided to do a clean of the whole house. She had just finished a load of laundry that had been waiting to be washed for at least two weeks. That included Bucky’s laundry, which he usually did himself but he had also let it pile up the last few weeks.

After folding it, (Y/N) turned to Bucky’s dresser to put his clothes away. When she opened the top drawer, she noticed something tucked away. She pulled it out and found it was a small moleskin journal. She hadn’t seen it before. Before she could consider what it might be for, or why Bucky might be hiding it away, she opened it.

It was a list of names. (Y/N) didn’t recognize any of them, but they were undoubtably written in Bucky’s writing. There were pages of names, some of which were crossed out. (Y/N) knew about Bucky’s past - about being a man out of time who was once a brainwashed weapon for Hydra. She began to wonder if these names were people he once knew. Maybe family of his old friends from the 40s, or whoever was still alive from then.

That seemed like a reasonable explanation, until she saw her name was one of the ones crossed out.

She backed up until her legs collided with the bed. She fell back to a sit, staring long and hard at her own name.

Why am I included in Bucky’s journal? she thought. Was he looking for me? And if so, why?

She was so lost in her own thoughts that she didn’t hear Bucky coming home. Suddenly, he was stood in the doorway to the bedroom. (Y/N) looked up at him, still with a look of confusion on her face. Bucky had been smiling, but when his eyes fell onto the book, his smile faded. His reaction made her heart sink. She would feel guilty for looking through his stuff under different circumstances, but now all she could think of was what the journal was for.

Bucky broke their silence first, “Where’d you find that?”

“It was in your top drawer,” she replied. Quickly, she added, “I found it while putting the laundry away. I didn’t think...” She trailed off, looking back down at the book. “What is this?”

Bucky ran his hand through his hair and sighed. There was no use in lying about it. He had to come clean eventually. “You know how we’ve talked about my time as the Winter Soldier? All the bad I did while I was under their control?”

She nodded. Of course, how could she ever forget? He had opened up to her very early on in their relationship about what he had gone through under Hydra’s control. He told her because he said he didn’t want to keep secrets from her, and he wanted to give her the opportunity to leave before the relationship got too serious if what he did changed her opinion on him. It was a shock, especially since she was a former SHIELD agent who had heard plenty of stories about the infamous Winter Soldier, but she assured him that her opinion on him hadn’t changed. “You are not that person,” she ahd told him.

“When Shuri deprogrammed me,” he explained, “and when I started going to therapy, my therapist suggested finding a way to make amends for all the bad I did. That book is a list of people I hurt...or-or killed as the Winter Soldier. I’ve met with most of them, or their remaining families, and done whatever I could do to make amends.”

(Y/N) looked at all the names again. All people from Bucky’s past. People he hurt when he didn’t even have control over his own body and mind. The crossed out names were people he felt he had made amends with.

Her name was one of the ones crossed out.

“Why am I here?” she asked. Her voice was so soft he may not have heard it if he didn’t have enhanced hearing.

“Do you remember that mission you went on that resulted in you leaving SHIELD?”

(Y/N) tensed. She remembered, although very slightly. She had some gaps in her memory from that night, but she remembered the most important part: that she had almost died.

The details of the mission were one of the foggy things. All she could remember was being sent to a supposed Hydra base with other SHIELD agents. She had gone off by herself. She was moving down what she thought was an empty hallway. That’s where her memory stopped. Next thing she knew, she had woken up in a hospital bed days later. Fury didn’t tell her many details, just that she was attacked and nearly lost her life. Another agent had luckily found her before it was too late.

Fury had offered to let (Y/N) be off as long as she needed. He assured her that her job would be waiting for her when she was ready to come back. Instead, (Y/N) quit on the spot.

When she finally dared to look up at Bucky, she saw that he was crying. She had been holding back her own emotions, but seeing Bucky break was enough to make her finally break too.

“It was me,” Bucky admitted, his voice breaking. “I did that to you.”

(Y/N)’s hands clutched the journal. She was tempted to rip it to shred and leave the pieces scattered all over the bedroom floor. Their bedroom floor. The bedroom in the house that they had bought together nearly a year ago.

“Was any of it real?”

She didn’t mean to say it out loud. It was a thought that slipped through her filter before she could stop herself. But it was also a question she needed an answer on. She had already spent three years of her life with Bucky, and had planned to spend the rest of it with him, too. But if all of this was just a way for him to “make amends” with her...that would’ve hurt her worse than finding out that the man she loved was the reason she almost died.

Although, that wasn’t Bucky. That’s what she had been telling him since he first told her about the Winter Soldier. He wasn’t in control, he didn’t know what he was doing. He was made to think he was a weapon to be used against anyone Hydra viewed as an enemy, and at that point in time, (Y/N) was the enemy in question.

But it was Bucky who had lied to her for three years. Post-brainwashed Bucky, who knew this whole time that he had hurt her when he was under Hydra’s spell. Who had sought her out to “make amends”, and just so happened to end up in a relationship with her.

Bucky seemed hurt by the question. “Of course! Of course, all of it was real. All of this is real.”

“You say that like it’s an outrageous thing to ask, but how can I not think that maybe this is how you decided to ‘make amends’ with me?”

She was standing now. She didn’t even notice she had stood, but now she was looking Bucky in the eye.

“Three years, Buck,” she continued. “We’ve been together for three years. You had so much time to tell me this, and you never did. Were you ever going to? Or were you just going to let me believe that we met by chance in a grocery store and fell in love and it was all happily ever after?”

“I tried to tell you,” he said. “When I first told you about my past, I wanted to tell you then. That was the whole reason I told you. But then you were being so understanding and kind, and you were making me feel less like a monster, I just...I couldn’t. I thought if I told you then...that you wouldn’t have been as understanding.”

“Bucky, I’m not upset or mad or scared of you because of what happened. I know that wasn’t you. That’s what I’ve been saying for ages, that you’re not the Winter Soldier. What I am upset about is that you didn’t tell me about this amends thing. You didn’t even mention that it was something you did. I had to find out three years into our relationship, which now has me questioning whether or not this whole thing was just a way for you to make amends with me.”

“No! No, (Y/N), it’s not - ”

He reached out for her and she took a step back. They both paused as (Y/N) realized what she did. She had done it out of anger, but the look in Bucky’s eyes told her that he was afraid she was doing it out of fear, too. That one look was enough to make her anger turn to sympathy. She was still angry, and she was sure that anger wasn’t going anywhere, but she could understand Bucky’s hesitance in telling her about the attack. That just wasn’t the issue she was currently having.

“How did you plan to make amends with me?” she asked. “Because if taking me out on that first date was your plan, I’m going to be so upset and hurt - ”

“No, not at all,” he cut her off. “We met ages before I asked you on a date, remember? You said it yourself, it was at the grocery store.”

“Had you been looking for me, though? Was that actually a chance encounter, or did you look for me?”

He hesitated before responded, “I had looked for you. You were one of the few people who were already in New York, so I went looking to find out where you lived and figured out which places you were likely to visit in that area. I didn’t follow you or anything, but I did go to some of those places frequently to try and run into you.”

(Y/N) didn’t think about the slight creepy and stalker way that sounded. She had to remind herself he was saying he didn’t do that to try and start a relationship with her.

“We got to talking, and you told me about the issues you were having in your apartment,” he said. “You said your landlord was a piece of shit and didn’t offer any help whenever you needed it. So, I offered to help. Remember, I was there basically a whole day just fixing whatever issues you had?”

She remembered. She had been hesitant to accept the offer from a strange man she had only met moments before in a grocery store, but her old apartment was basically falling apart. She had done the best she could to fix whatever she knew how, but there were still so many issues, and her landlord kept blowing her off whenever she had talked to him about it. She was desperate. Not to mention she still had her SHIELD training if Bucky had ended up trying to pull anything while he was there.

“That was my amends,” he told her. “I knew it could never measure up to what I did to you, but it was something you needed done and I helped you. I crossed you off the list then and there, and I completely left you alone. I hadn’t thought about you for months after that, until...”

“Until we ran into each other on the street,” she remembered.

It was three or four months after Bucky had fixed up her apartment when she saw a familiar face walking the packed sidewalk of New York. She had been the one to initiate the conversation then. Bucky hadn’t even seemed to notice her until she waved him down and called out his name.

“And you basically begged for my number so we could keep in contact,” he reminded her. “I tried to stay away. I knew it was wrong, sick even, for me to get involved with you at all. But you had these big, pleading eyes, and you wouldn’t really take no for an answer. And then we got to talking, and one thing led to another and I found myself asking you on a date.”

When Bucky stepped towards her, reaching for her again, (Y/N) didn’t pull away. Instead, she let him take her into his arms. He was slow, giving her the option to pull away if she wanted to, and when she didn’t he pulled her all the way to him. She rested her head on his chest as he put his chin on the top of her head.

“I’m so sorry I never told you,” he said. “I know I should’ve. It’s eaten away at me for so long. But at time went on, I just fell more and more in love, and I was scared. I was selfish. You never should’ve had to find out this way.”

(Y/N) sighed. “No, I shouldn’t have. You should’ve told me when things really started to get serious. Especially about the amends stuff.”

“I know. I’m sorry, doll.” He kissed the top of her head, his lips lingering against her hair. “I understand if you need time to process everything. Like I said, I know it was wrong to pursue a relationship after what I did to you - ”

“How many times will I have to remind you that you are not the Winter Soldier?” she asked, pulling away so she could look at him. “Honestly, knowing that doesn’t affect our relationship. I fell in love with Bucky Barnes, the kind man who is carrying such a large burden on his shoulders because of other people who are actually evil. That part of the story isn’t what upsets me. It’s finding out that I was on an amendment list and not knowing how much of this relationship was actually real.”

Bucky cupped her face with his flesh hand, almost like he was afraid of her reaction to his metal arm now that she knew the truth. “All of it is real. I love you so, so much, (Y/N). I can’t imagine my life without you.”

She leaned into his touch. “I love you, too.”

He pulled her in for a kiss, but she pulled away. “You’ll have to add me back to that list.”

He looked at her, confused. “What?”

“After learning about all of this, you have to make a new amendment with me. Say, breakfast in bed? Oh, or maybe that puppy you keep conveniently forgetting we agreed to get?”

He smiled and pulled her to him again. When he kissed her, she didn’t pull away.

“I’ll do whatever you want. I’ll give you the whole world if it proves to you how much I love you.”

(Y/N) giggled. “Let’s start smaller with the puppy instead.”

Bucky chuckled. “Deal. We’ll go to the pound next week.”

“Tomorrow.”

He sighed, resting his forehead against hers. “Fine. Tomorrow.”

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes imagine #james buchanan barnes #sebastian stan #sebastian stan imagine #sebastian stan x reader #marvel #imagine #one shot #fanfiction #fanfic

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commandershepardvasfuckit · 7 months ago

Text

An Arranged Marriage, part 12

M!troll x f!reader

1.2k words

(Also, ask box is always open, I am literally always vibrating out of my skin to talk about this man)

--------

Sometime ago Zen’jan had stopped purring and seemed to be entirely asleep on your lap. You kept combing out his hair as long as you could, stopping only when you could not reach anymore because how he was laying back. It was a marvel just how much hair he was shedding, your lap was covered in green hairs and you had amassed quite a pile next to you as you cleaned out the comb.

With his head tilted on your lap one of his ears was sticking up, much longer and pointier than an elf’s, and you could not help tracing your finger along the edge. Midway up his ear there was a sizable tear and numerous nicks all up and down the sides. He sighed in his sleep while you played with his ear, maybe one day you would get up the courage to do things like that when he was awake too.

He seemed happy, a strange realization you had as you watched him doze. Sure he had smiled and joked with you a bit in the last month, but this was different, this was actual genuine happiness.

And it was weird to realize you were pretty happy too. For the first time in your life you were able to go where you wanted and do what you wanted. You had free reign to roam the city without being dogged by attendants chaperoning you around and deciding where you were allowed. You could go where you wanted, talk to who you wanted, just do what you wanted.

Maybe what was the most weird was without a doubt you knew Zen cared about you. You were not sure if you could call it love, from either of you, but he truly did everything he could to take care of you.

Your hand drifted from his ear back to his hair, he was shedding much less now as you ran your fingers through it. It was the dense, thick second layer to his hair seemed to be what was mainly shedding, then there were the longer strands that laid on top and gave his hair its length. You found yourself just absentmindedly playing with his hair while you got lost in your thoughts.

“Having fun?”

Startled, you looked down to see Zen looking back up at you smiling.

“You do not have to wait until I fall asleep to touch me you know” he continued.

“How long have you been awake?” you asked.

“Since you were touching my ear”.

“And you didn’t say anything?”

“No, it felt nice and I figured you would stop if you knew I was awake”

He was right. You were not sure why but you still felt embarrassed by it.

“Are you getting hungry? I did not mean to fall asleep again, so by now you must be starving” he asked.

“Yeah, I don’t think I’ve eaten since breakfast yesterday”.

“Would you prefer to stay home and rest, or would you like to come with me?” he asked.

You thought about it for a moment, part of you just wanted to wrap up in blankets and stay in the warmth and safety of your home, the other part of you did not like the idea of being left alone.

“I’ll come with you” you decided.

The two of you walked the streets of the market quarter of the city, Zen close enough to be brushing against you at all times. It seemed he was making up for lost time now that you were comfortable with him touching you.

He happily let you lead the way to any food stalls that caught your attention and translated for you so you could ask questions about any foods you were not familiar with. It was a nice change just to walk around with him eating street food and chatting, sure you were still exhausted, but this was a good distraction.

“You just let me know where you want to go and what you want to do” he said and gave your shoulder a squeeze.

You yelped, your shoulder stung and felt raw when he touched it.

“I am so sorry, did I grab you too hard?” he asked, panicked by your reaction.

“No, no it’s not that, just stings” you said.

“Let me see” carefully he tugged the collar of your shirt aside to check on your shoulder, “How did you not feel this before, look”

You looked at the top of your shoulder, your skin was bright red and angry and stung where his fingers accidentally grazed it. The redness continued down the top part of your arm.

“From the sun yesterday, since your shoulders and arms were not really covered” he said, “We can get something for it on the way home”.

The two of you continued your walk, Zen insisting on buying all sorts of sweets and snacks for later. He paused in front of a small shop before ducking inside with you in tow. Herbs and plants overflowed from shelves and hung from the ceiling and an older troll woman sat behind the counter.

She called out in the troll language to the two of you and you smiled politely, not knowing what she said.

Zen however immediately launched into an animated conversation. You smiled while you watched him, he was much livelier speaking his own language, gesturing with his hands and emoting. You loved listening to him speak even if you did not know what he was saying, he always seemed happier using his language versus his stiff common.

The two of you left the shop with a small jar of something and made your way home.

“May I?” he asked as the two of you sat together at home on the bed. He was holding the little jar from the shop and gesturing to your shoulder.

You tugged the edge of your collar aside and Zen quickly got to applying whatever was in the jar. It was cold against your skin, but did help take the sting away. Gently he continued, moving on to your other shoulder and both arms. It was nice a nice feeling as he sat behind you, the quiet sort of intimacy of just helping someone.

You leaned back against him, resting your back on his chest and he lowered his head down on top of yours. You reached up and offered him some of the pastry you had been eating, though instead he planted a few soft kisses along the inside of your wrist, his gentle show of affection made your heart flutter a bit.

“Are you happy, Zen?” you asked.

“I am” his lips were still against your wrist as he spoke, “Are you?”

You thought about it again. You were in a city where you did not speak the language, your husband followed the lord of shadows and you were still avoiding unpacking your feelings about that, and in the last month you really had only made one friend. But you were happy, more than anything you were free.

“I am” you said.

“Good” he nuzzled the top of your head, “Do I still need to sleep on the floor?” he teased.

You turned sideways a bit and buried your face into his chest, “No, I think I really liked sleeping together earlier” you could not look at him while you admitted it.

“I am happy that you feel comfortable with me now”

You could hear his soft purr as he spoke.

Part 13

#monster fucker #monster lover #teratophillia #terato #monster x reader #troll oc

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synthetickitsune · 3 months ago

Note

hello!! i absolutely love all of your seventeen works, your writing is so amazing 💗

i was wondering if i could request some junhui comfort where he’s home after a long time. it could be angsty, maybe leading into a little spice but you can choose the premise of where it goes! i just wanted to give the idea since we all miss him sm

thank you so much 💗 feel free to skip if it’s not okay! i just wanted to tell you that i absolutely live your writing and i come baxk to your jun works almost all the time!

Jun (SVT) | Back home fluff | 0.8k | gn!reader A/N: thank you so much, anon!! you're so sweet ♡ i hope this is okay!

He keeps bumping into furniture. He keeps having to look for snacks, little things he needs. Embarrassingly enough, he can’t remember where to put the dishes when unloading the dishwasher.

It’s the small things that really break a man and Junhui hasn’t felt this lost and desperate in a long time. You always chuckle and reassure him it’s fine, help him figure out his way around the apartment - and he loves that. He loves that he gets to kiss you and tell you he wouldn’t survive without you and hear you laugh. Nonetheless he can’t help but feel sad that you need to do that. He doesn’t want to be a stranger in his own home.

To be fair, it’s understandable. You made some changes - that you’ve consulted and agreed on with him - to the apartment layout, you got some new furniture, and thus stuff just had to be moved around. He remembers how long you’ve complained about getting used to it yourself, so he frankly shouldn’t be taking this as hard as he is. It’s inevitable. He must just be missing sharing the experience with you.

It piles up, though, these little frustrations, and while you’re resting on the couch one day, the television just a background noise for Jun, who’s intently listening to you talking about your day, and you mention sometimes he has no clue about - it just gets too much. You see the way his face falls and his brows furrow slightly and immediately want to make it right.

“Oh my god, I forgot to tell you about this,” you jump up and as excited as you seem to be to fill him up, he can’t match your energy.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers and gives you a sad half smile, “I’ve been gone for too long, right?”

Now it’s your time to frown. You shake your head and put your hand over his.

“Jun, you were working. It’s alright,” you try to reassure him.

“I know, but that’s not what I asked,” he insists. You sigh.

“You were gone for a while, yeah, but it can’t be helped,” you say calmly while you intertwine your fingers, “What’s going on?”

He shrugs. To be honest he didn’t plan to spill the beans, would rather figure it out on his own. You’re looking at him like that, though, and he doesn’t want you to worry. So he takes your other hand into his as well and turns to fully face you.

“I feel like I don’t belong here-”

“Jun-”

“No, please,” he squeezes your hands, “Just listen.”

He doesn’t know where it all came from, but he can’t stop the words from spilling out. He knows he’s rambling and probably doesn’t make sense, one half-finished sentence turning into another, yet he’s helpless to stop. Whenever he looks up, though, you’re listening and nodding along. Jun must be falling in love all over again.

“What I want to say is,” he licks his lips and lets his head fall forward. He hasn’t even noticed you got so close that he can rest it on your shoulder. He’s not complaining. “I missed you and everything feels too new.”

“I missed you too,” you wrap your arms around him, “You’ll settle in, just give it time. There’s nothing else to do. Remember how I kept stubbing my toe on the new dresser? You haven’t once, so you’re already doing better than me.”

He chuckles and finally hugs you back. “Or we can rearrange the place again. So we’re struggling again together.”

“Baby the whole point was that you’d come home and could just relax without worrying about this stuff,” you sigh. Honestly it’s more of a whine because just imagining going through the whole process feels overwhelming.

“Just the bedroom? I don’t want to feel like a stranger in there,” Jun pulls away to give you the best starving man begging for bread crumbs look he can muster. You gaslight yourself into thinking you won’t give in.

“It’s almost midnight,” you try to argue but you’re getting weaker.

“Please? It’ll be quick. We don’t need to do much,” he pleads with you.

And because you’re a fool in love, it’s now two a.m. and you’re shifting the bed closer to the windows. Music is playing softly in the background to keep you energetic. Your boyfriend keeps shushing the furniture as if it was its fault that it’s being moved when your neighbours are likely already asleep. The bedside tables are standing by the wall, judging you.

By four a.m. your bedroom looks familiar but not the same. Jun is beaming though, and that’s important.

#seventeen scenarios #seventeen reactions #jun x reader #jun scenarios #svthub #seventeen imagines #seventeen fluff #jun fluff #seventeen x reader #svt scenarios #svt reactions #svt fluff #drabble #requested

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peachhcs · 4 months ago

Text

the new guy | the wonder years

hughes!sister x will smith au (samy + will)

will finds out about samy's new boyfriend kevin after thinking there might be a chance for them after they kissing at her senior year kickoff party

wc: 1.7k

cooked this up because 1. i love wonder years and 2. i don’t think i’ve ever written everyone meeting kevin for the first time (i’m also running out of pics so im resorting to gifs lol)

au masterlist

it was a typical friday night for the boys. they raced home after their game to change and make it to samy's first soccer game of the season that started promptly at 7. their goal this season was to make to every single one of her games that didn't coincide with their own games. ryan's mom's suv was definitely going to be put to good use.

the seven of them piled in and were on the road by 6:15 which was record time for them considering their game just finished at 5:30. will was feeling a bit giddy tonight. he had a great game with two goals and an assist and now he was about to see samy for the first time since last weekend. he was still thinking about that drunken kiss they shared.

he knew they were just playing with one another like back in april during that seven minutes in heaven, but will couldn't help thinking that maybe it meant something more this time. it'd been on his mind since last weekend when it happened and the boy started wondering what exactly the relationship he had with the girl was. they were friends, yeah, but..could there be a possibility for something more?

will's never really thought of her that way. maybe that one time when they were twelve, but that didn't count because they were twelve. all he knew was that she'd been on his mind a lot more recently and he started wondering what it meant or if it was even normal to be thinking of his best friend that much? surely it was because he thought of all the guys in the car with him a fair amount. either way, will was excited to see her.

they pulled into the already full lot exactly fifteen minutes before kick off. gabe was texting marcie and riley asking where they were sitting as they walked towards the bleachers. they spotted the two girls in the student section and quickly joined them.

"i'm surprised you guys made it in time," marcie teased and made room for the seven of them.

"you should've seen will barking us around. he was not playing around," ryan teases the blonde who flushed. he scanned the field for samy.

she was by the bench talking with some of the girls. her captain band was wrapped proudly around the top of her shin before her socks started. will knew how hard samy worked for that honor this season and he was proud of her for finally being able to show it off and lead the girls to another successful season in her last year.

"this should be an easy sweep. central michigan has always had a shitty defense," marcie mumbled as the boys' gazes swept over to the other team warming up.

will's gaze followed the other students in the stands. he recognized some of them from the parties samy dragged him to. being in the student section really made the boys feel like they were in high school which was another reason why they wanted to go to the games because they got to experience high school traditions the dev program didn't give them.

samy finally waved up at the stands to the boys who eagerly waved back at her. will smiled widely when he caught her gaze. he watched her gaze fall to the other side to wave at her parents and then the next person she waved at caught him off guard.

it was a guy with brunette hair about three rows down from them. he was taller and stood with some friends that looked to be on the boy's soccer team. samy was smiling widely at him and will's stomach twisted seeing her wave at him.

but he tried to not think about it too much. maybe he was just a friend? yeah, a friend. she could have friends. will was thinking about this too much.

the game was a clean sweep like marcie said. samy's team scored three goals, one of them being from samy and she assisted the other two. the students cheered for them as they ran up to the bleachers to give out high-fives before running back to the benches. the students began filing out of the bleachers to meet the players in the parking lot after their post game debrief.

the boys talked with marcie and riley waiting for samy to come out. her parents joined them a second later where ellen and jim happily greeted them and thanked them for coming. will was too immersed in his conversation with drew and aram that he didn't see samy come out and turn her attention to the boy she waved to before the game started.

she greeted him with a warm hug and blushed when he gave her flowers. will didn't see them coming until gabe nudged his shoulder and marcie ran to hug her best friend.

"you played so well!" the girl exclaimed making samy flush.

"thanks for coming guys. i didn't actually think you'd make it on time," the soccer player said the the boys.

"thank will. he got us moving," ryan clapped his friend's shoulder. the blonde smiled softly at her. she returned it before directing her gaze back to the boy will saw earlier.

he quickly noticed the flowers in her hand and the shy expressions on both of their faces. that twist in will's stomach quickly returned as he put the pieces together.

"there's someone i want you guys to meet. this is kevin," samy introduced him and he shyly waved at everyone.

for a second, everyone looked at will while the blonde had a blank expression on his face. the excitement he had earlier started fading as he realized what this meant.

"nice to meet you. we're samy's hockey friends," ryan finally said and held his hand out. he was always the one to break the ice first. kevin shook his hand.

"good to meet you guys. samy talks highly of all of you," kevin chuckled.

will struggled to meet samy's gaze that he knew was on him because she was searching for his approval. he didn't really know what to think.

it was dumb to think that maybe he had a chance with her. samy was right. those two kisses were just for fun because they were drunk half the time anyway. it didn't mean anything and will shouldn't have thought it did. he swallowed and sucked up his pride.

"didn't know samy had a new fling," drew chirped up with a small, teasing smirk.

"we've been talking for a few weeks," the girl giggled and then will's eyes nearly bulged out of his head. a few weeks? she's been talking to this guy a few weeks and they still made out in her friend's bathroom last weekend. were they even official then?

"we've been keeping it on the down low until making it official a few days ago," kevin slung his arm around her shoulders.

will found gabe's gaze beside him. the dark-haired boy spoke with his eyes like he knew exactly what will was thinking. gabe didn't really know about the drunk make-outs will and samy have done, but he could probably take a guess. it was fairly obvious whenever the two came back out of the bathroom. all gabe did was place a hand on his friend's shoulder and offered a tight-lipped smile to the new guy in front of them.

"well, it's nice to meet you, kevin. hopefully we'll see you around more," gabe said.

"we're gonna head out, but thanks a lot for coming guys. i always like seeing you guys up there," samy grinned and walked back through the parking lot with kevin.

ellen and jim wished the others goodbye and safe travels back to plymouth. the boys glanced between one another.

"sorry i didn't mention anything. samy wanted to like..surprise you guys," marcie said and looked at will. everyone seemed to be looking at will.

"it's fine. he seems cool," the blonde finally said.

"i know you guys are..and we tease you guys about.."

"no, we're just friends, you know that. all of that doesn't mean anything to us," will cut marcie off, managing his best smile. the others exchanged quick glances before deciding to let it go for now. they said goodbye to marcie and riley before climbing back into ryan's suv to head back.

the car ride was a bit silent. will stared out the window suddenly rethinking everything. he should've known him and samy's relationship would just be a friendship and nothing more than that. it was stupid of him to even think otherwise. they hardly even talked too. usually, samy would be all over him after the game and wanted to talk until they had to leave.

she just left without even saying a word to him really. that did kind of hurt.

ryan dropped everyone back off at their houses. the two boys walked back into the house in silence. ryan didn't want to prod, but he's also never seen will so quiet before.

"look, i know it's not my business, but are you good?" the brunette raised his eyebrow when they were away from the prying ears of their moms.

"i'm fine, why?" will didn't meet his gaze.

"you're just weirdly quiet," ryan mumbled.

"i'm fine. it's nothing," the blonde shrugged and as much as ryan hated prying, he kept talking.

"look, i know the teasing we make at you is all in good fun about samy, but..i didn't know she was talking to someone. i'm sorry."

"why are you sorry? it's not like we were like together or liked each other," will said quickly and ryan gave him a look that both of them knew the blonde was not telling the full truth or at least that ryan saw right through him.

"right, yeah," the brunette mumbled. they left the conversation at that because ryan wasn't gonna poke anymore. will was left to think about ryan's words and what exactly they meant to him because surely, he didn't actually like samy like that.

right?

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trendywaifus · 1 month ago

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TASTE OF THE MOON

01. LUTHER

lucy kushinada x gn! reader.

↳ “ even if we are worlds apart, we’re still together right now, staring up at the same sky and moon. “

cw: blood, character death, mentions of death, edgerunner spoilers, takes through ep 1-4, kinda tied with canon events, cursing, suggestive themes, reader is david’s sibling.

im gonna do a 1.5! will be adding it to the master list. first time writing a long ahh chapter like this i think. lmk how i did fr🙏🏽 i hope my characterization was good for the cyber punk lovers. prob still have mistakes I’ve glossed over tho but im fried off benadryl rn so

“ davi, you’re going out to do another errand? seriously? we just done a gig like yesterday! ”

“ yeah. i told you that i need the training. can’t sit around like this. “

the tan-skinned boy slips on the jacket your mother tragically left behind after she passed. now that he wears it everywhere as if it was the only article of clothing that he has, it feels like you’re force to see her everyday through him. it’s a cruel reminder of how fucked up night city is. having to see your mother struggle to take of you and david by herself without a father, working herself to the bone to ensure a stable future for you and him—only for her to get fatally injured during some random drive by and inevitably pass the next day because of capitalism nearly broke you. if david died along with her, you don’t know what you would’ve done. and, you weren’t even there with them during the tragic accident, you were home sick with a virus. gloria was originally supposed to pick up david early after getting a call from the academy because of an incident involving him using an unauthorized chip. you sat home alone for hours until david abruptly came home in the evening without your mother with his head hung low, and bandages all over.

you bombarded david with questions about gloria’s absence and his injuries. he was so dispirited that he barely wanted to talk. once you were able to get everything out of him, you instantly regretted asking. that night you didn’t sleep at all. you went out that night to walk aimlessly around and gained the habit of moon gazing. within the several days, everything was hell for you and david. one thing piled after another—collecting gloria’s ashes and her emt jacket, overdue rent, david finding a military grade-sandevistan she unknowingly left behind, he went from wanting to sell it to installing it in his body out of anger without even telling you. then, he got into a rematch with one of the sorry boys in the academy who happened to be the son of an arasaka board director. david ended up getting exiled and you haven’t been to the academy since the day you got sick. there’s no absolutely no reason to go there now that your mother was gone. you were on your last warning anyways for consecutively being in heated arguments with shitty classmates yourself. your only focus now is to make sure david is okay while living on the edge for survival.

“ alright, let me hop with you this time. “ you said, standing up from the couch, grabbing your black, leather jacket. david huffs, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

“ (name), you don’t gotta come with me, you know. i can do this on my own. ‘don’t have to trouble yourself, i’ll be alright— “

“ shut up gonk, i’m comin’ with. i need ‘training ’ too, you know? “ you mocked his grumpy voice, he smacks his lips and waits for you by the door, impatiently tapping his foot. that boy is really dedicated in wanting to fit in. “ i’m followin’ you, give me the detes as we walk. “

—

cop sirens eerily echo in the distance as you and david tread cautiously along streets of vistal del rey, stepping over burned-out cigs, empty chip bags, and broken bottles. deteriorating building become more outdated as you venture deeper into the infamous district. the streets are less crowded, only a few civilians occasionally walking by; it’s nearly dead. you bet that if some gonk were to shout two streets away, it would reach your ears within seconds. crumbles of minerals fall to the ground as cars speed through the highway above. the stench of strong tobacco and other addictions nearly burns your nose. you never really been to vistal del rey or parts of heywood but you are aware of the strong grip that the valentinos has over these areas. gloria hammered down on teaching her children about the dangers of ruthless gangs. one of her lines that stuck to your brain like glue was —“there are never good endings to those who live their life on the edge, miho. ”. your mother was an emt who seen many tragic endings. being the oldest, she shared to you many stories of gang members who lost their life to gang violence. you growing up in arroyo, santo domingo, a shitty, district full of degenerates and poverty made you hyperaware of your surroundings for you and david’s sake by the age of ten.

and especially now since you’re apart of an edgerunner crew, your awareness has been razor sharp.

“ fucking pilar. did that bastard really send us here for one of his useless packages? you call this trainin’ david? you were better off with me teachin’ you how to fight good with that sandevistan of yours!” you whispered harshly, crossing your arms in frustration, digging your nails into the leather texture of your jacket. the younger boy merely grunts, surveying the area for a particular clue pilar given him about the meetup spot. “ we’re in the right area, he mentioned something about some alley and a tall, purple haired guy leaning against one of the oh—found him. .straight ahead. “ david lowly relays to you with the nudge of his elbow.

a suspicious man who looks to have shaggy, purple hair, was slouched against the wall, clad in black silicone pants, a light purple fitted t-shirt and black boots. compared to the dull, washed colors this area had, he was a anomaly. from the sound of your footsteps, he turns his head towards the direction of the source. his grey eyes coat into a sheen light blue as he scans the two of you from head to toe suspiciously. once you approached the guy and stopped a few meters away from him, he spoke with a thick, hispanic accent, “ the striped jacket boy. .david, yeah? “

“ yeah, that’s me. “

he turns his head to you, brow raised as he openly admires you with interest.

he casts you a flirtatious smile and your nose crunch up with disgust. “ thought that gonk said you’d be by yourself, choom. butt, i’m fine with this. the name’s rayez, who might you be cariño? “

before you can open your mouth, david surprises you by taking a step forward, seemingly positioning himself protectively in front of you. “ that’s my sib, we’re just here to pick up a package for pilar and go on our way. “ david explains firmly, throwing the man a pointed stare. the taller, fair-skinned man tilts his head to the side, bearing an intimidating expression on his face as he sizes the shorter boy up with his statue. they stay silent for a few, prolonged moments as they glare into each other’s eyes, not one moving a muscle.

rayez willingly surrenders, throwing his hands up with a friendly smile that’s clearly condescending. “ you got it. i don’t want no beef, kiddo. you just have a fine-lookin’ sibling, that’s all. “ he gestures his head towards the alley, “ behind me into the alleyway, i got the package in the trunk. “

david tries to follow the dealer but you abruptly stop him in his tracks by the sleeve. you noticed his arm slightly shaking—was david scared? “ wait davi. i don’t trust that, how about you bring the package to us? this area is dead as hell right now, there’s not a soul in sight.”

rayez narrows his eyes at you, a glint of annoyance swimming in them. you glared at him right back and once again, he relents, throwing you a relaxed grin. “ si, si, i understanddd. you lookin’ at me like that really gettin’ me nervous, cariño. i’ll go get it~ “ then he walks into the alleyway, disappearing behind the wall. you send each other nervous looks, silently agreeing that if rayez tries something you’ll be on alert to react. after a minute or two, there wasn’t any sounds of his supposed car turning on or his trunk opening and closing. the shaggy-haired man simply came back out with a brown package in his hands.

“ here ya go. “

like that, he plops it into david’s hands. your brother thanks him and just as you were about to leave, rayez inquires suddenly,

“ before you birds dip, what’s y’all’s last names? “

“ uh. . martinez? what’s it to you? “ david answers ‘nonchalantly’, but you can still hear the uncertainty behind his words.

the older man shrugs, glancing between you and david with a lazy smile.

“ the martinez siblings, huh? i can tell you, little man is the youngest, “ he points at david, “ and you’re the oldest. “ he points at you.

you click your tongue, “ again, what’s it to you? “

the corners of rayez’s gaze softens, he shrugs again, digs in his pocket and brought out a pack of cigarettes. “ nothin’. just observation, choomba. from the way you two have each other’s back, i can tell that all y’all got is each other. i respect that a lot. if it weren’t for you, that little man would of been zero’d in that alleyway by now. “

david spats, “ tch, bullshit, as if i’d—“

“ naive, but david’s smarter than you think. “ you snarled abruptly, “ i maybe the oldest, but my lil bro here is the special one. make no mistake, he wouldn’t of been ended so easily by the likes of you, cockmuncher. “

you grab the collar of your brother’s jacket, dragging him away from the grinning man. rayez brings the cancer rod to his pierced lips. “ i wonder, “ he takes out a lighter from his back pocket, flicks it open, and sparks a flame with practiced ease. the small flame is strong and unwavering, “ of how your stories will end. . . .together in a blaze of glory or. . “ he lights up the end of his cigarette and takes a long puff.

he close the lighter and tucks it back into his pocket.

“ or alone shrouded in smoke and chaos? “ rayez finishes, taking out the cig to blow a puff of smoke into the dead air. he turns back around into the alleyway, joining a group of armed men.

—

“ gotta tell bec to shoot her stupid ass brother for me. “ you spat, stomping along the asphalt, chest tight with anger. “ first he got us going to fuckin’ vista del rel for some shady bastard who deadfucking ass wanted to fuck me and literally fuck you over, and now we have to walk and take the train over to their crib to deliver this man his golden, cyberware dildo! “

david sighs, letting you rant while he thinks about your words to the dealer. considering that he had the sandevistan implanted in him without much complications and he’s able to use it several times in a day before getting fatigued with just a nose bleed, can he really cement the idea in his head that he’s special?

“ (name)? “

“ what davi? “

while the package is tucked under his armpit, he awkwardly rubs the back of his head with his free hand. “ what you said back there, is that true? that i’m special i mean. “

all your irritation instantly melts away; you crack into a grin, draping an arm around his shoulders, and pulled him into a clumsy side hug.

“ i mean, yeah. on top of that, you’re the smartest guy that i know. i believe in you. “

david bites down on his bottom lip, a lodge almost immediately forms in his dry throat. he swears that he hears gloria in you.

night city really is a cruel reality to live in.

—

while david stands awkwardly behind you, you angrily knocked on rebecca and pilar’s apartment door a few times. it only took a half second for the door to swing open and for a barrel to kiss you right on your forehead. “ explain why the fuck you’re—oh, (name) and david! what’s up chooms? wow, (name), you looked pissed! ” rebecca whistles, drawing back her pistol as she stands at the doorway only in her black bra and underwear.

“ bec, call for your son of a bitch of a brother, please.”you requested calmly, barely holding back your raging anger while presenting her the package in your hands.

glancing down at your quivering hands, she grins with anticipation, practically hearing the anger bubbling in your voice, and whips her head around to call her brother who’s too busy doing his own shit in the back of the apartment.

“ yo bro! (name) and david got your package from maine again! come n’ get it! “

as soon as you hear pilar’s excited, crazed laughter and seeing him skipping around the corner to retrieve his package, you hurled the thing straight at his face without any regards. before he had time to react, it hits him right where you want him and he falls back against the wall.

“ aw, fuck! the fuck was that for, you crazy gonk?! “

“ fuck you, you lanky armed bastard! get your own package next time! i hope you enjoy that new golden dildo up your ass! “ you spat, sharply turning on your heel to stomp away. the sounds of rebecca’s loud laughter fills the crispy, lively air.

“ davi! make sure you get our tip from bec. i’ll be over there to take a chill pill! “ you shouted, brushing past david to go stand by the pole near the entrance of the complex. you fix the collar of your leather jacket and crossed your arms tightly against your chest. shitheads like pilar pisses you off, they’re so common amongst santo domingo and the academy. those type of people who’d get what they want from you, completely fuck you over and laugh in your face like you’re the biggest gonk in night city. your temper and patience dwindled as years passed by, developing a short temper.

“ heyo, “ lucy’s smooth voice rings though your receptor suddenly, earning a exasperated grunt from you. “ you and david gonna be free tonight to run? “

“ yo. yes lucy, sure will be. “ you replied more annoyed than you wanted to be. there’s a small pause on the other end and lucy hums before speaking up,

“ you sound upset. wrong timing? “

you glance over towards david’s direction, he’s currently still talking to rebecca for the tip. you let out a short sigh that’s meant to cool off some steam. “ yes and no. it wasn’t directed at you or anything, me and david was just doing some shitty errand. “

“ oh fun. i’ll leave you both to it then, see you later. “

she ends the call and you just slouch against the sign, looking up at the yellowish, blue sky. the sun is starting to set and the moon’s slowly becoming visible by the hour. lucy was a strange character—an enigma who holds pieces of herself behind her back. she’d give you broken shards and hide the rest away, leaving you to figure out the ones in your hands. your first impression of her was already rocky since she tried to steal your chip. thanks to david catching her in the act with his sandev, she didn’t. but, one thing led to another and you ended up witnessing two deviants stealing shit for some eddies. not wanting to be involved, you got off the train early. you really wish that you didn’t because david exhausted himself trying to impress her by using his sandevistan too much which caused lucy to call an ambulance for the stupid boy. lucy explained that during the ride to the hospital, the emt deliberately missed the turn to the location, pulled a gun on her and david while he was on the carrier, and revealed herself to be a scav who wanted his sandev.

what lucy did made your jaw slack all the way down to the ground. not only did she endanger david, but also herself by releasing the carrier from the ambulance, throwing themselves into highway traffic and hazardously maneuvered it around in reverse, avoiding speeding cars while having a absolute blast. although you were thankful of her for saving david, you couldn’t help but think of her as a nutjob—but a cool one. you met up with them at docs for david’s treatment and made sure to chew him out for overusing his sandev.

“ you two wanna come over my place? “

her sudden question made you look at her like she was crazy and david reluctantly just accepts the invitation. you can tell your brother was intrigued by her and honestly, you don’t blame him after she risked her life (and his!) to save him. not to mention, lucy was a sight for sore eyes herself—a pretty lady with a nice amount of sense (still a nutjob!) that others in night city lacked. however, you knew better than to wholly trust her when you only knew her for half a day.

upon you, david, and lucy entering inside of her home, your eyes locked onto a large, rectangular window in her apartment with a perfect view of the moon nestled in the night sky. after settling down with the netrunner, you learned about her common interest in the moon both from the poster on her wall and through chatting. just like you, she had the habit an interest in staring at the moon to fill the void in her heart, just like you, she wanted to get away from the clenched jaws of night city. but unlike you, who had your mother’s crumbling dreams floating through the skies of a shithole of a city and david to look after; lucy has no ties other than the crew she’s with. who knows how much they really mean to her. maybe if given the chance to, she’d probably run away.

your guard around her dwindled as the conversation continued. it completely dissipated when she introduced you to a brain dance of a reconstruction of the moon which strengthened your dream to travel to the moon. the moon simulation felt so real, the sun’s warmth kissing your skin, its shine nearly blinding you as if it actually could. your body was light so the first you did was jump and float around, feeling free. lucy would laugh fondly at your childlike discoveries throughout your time with her. she showed you so many things, made you feel so many emotions during that short time with her. after a fun while, you and lucy sat down to gaze at the fake earth ahead, full of joy and satisfaction.

“ i never showed anyone this before. i. .had fun. “

breaking your attention from the earth, you turned your head, and you became speechless. painted rosy lips curled into a soft, warm smile, her pastel eyes twinkled at you, holding a unreadable emotion you couldn’t decipher. all you knew was the feeling of awe and soon after, a sharp pain to your cheek, forcefully taking you out of the bd.

you grit your teeth at the remembrance of the interrogation with maine and his crew. at the time, getting pressed by a group of edgerunners and feeling utterly betrayed by a stranger you almost trusted nearly made you throw a fit. however, you held back the anger, almost like holding back the most shittiest urge to vomit while standing in public. you didn’t want to get you and david into deeper shit. the boy himself almost got his sandev ripped from his body if he didn’t impress maine with his rare, high usage of the military grade implant.

—

“ yo, (n/n), i got the tip. you nova now? “ david asks, joining your side, pulling you out of your thoughts.

pushing yourself from the metal rod, you lazily stretched your arms above your head. “ when we leave this place, yup. also, lucy called. told her that we’re gonna be free to run with her tonight. “

the boy awkwardly scratches the back of his head, his facial expression brightening from the mention of her name. you notice and simply started to walk; david follows after. “ preem. i’ve need to get some more training in. “

“ and with lucy, the girl who saved your live and almost ended ours together by snitchin’. “ you grumble, crossing your arms back over your chest. david lets out a soft sigh, tucking his hands in his jacket pockets.

“ i was starting to get over that. not really that mad like before though. “

“ when i think bout it, i can’t help but to. normally i don’t get my shit tangled up like this, but i don’t exactly like getting hung up by my ankle with a black eye after getting taken to the moon by a girlie who likes to be spontaneous on the first day. .” somewhere in the back of your mind, you don’t really blame her.

cars occasionally rode past as you and david stroll down the streets of watson. the district wasn’t much different than heywood, vistal del rey, and santo domingo. it used to be an area once full of life, bubbling with lively biz—now it’s sour with gang violence much like the corners of night city. maelstrom and tiger claws are the cause as they ruin everything they touch, greedy and terrible, just like corpo rats. they’re so territorial that they’re fighting each other over parts of the district. many tragic endings of innocents are caused by them, families separated, and young, impressionable adolescents left to make series of bad choices that’ll have them leave the earth as one of many statistics in night city.

“ yeah, maine and them came barging in while you and lucy was in the brain dance. caught me by surprise and before i knew it, maine decked me in the face. hurt like a bitch too. “ the younger sibling clicks his tongue, lazily kicking away an empty can of beer without a single thought.

“ trust me, i know. fuck, that black eye lasted for a good min, didn’t it? i swear one day i’ll get my lick back. and lucy definitely owes me an apology. double too. “ you ghost your hand over your port on the side of your neck where the netrunner discreetly implanted the tracker in. the audacity for maine to warn you and david to not run away—like, where the fuck to? david remained quiet up until you reached the metrostation with him. you paid for his ticket and yours with ease. luckily the train hasn’t arrived yet and not many people were around so you sat down on a bench while david stood beside it.

“ . .why didn’t you tell me your dream was to go to the moon? “ david spoke out, breaking the silence, his still gaze was fixated somewhere off in the distance.

you leaned back into the bench, looking up at the sky that’s now turning into a dark purple. “ because it’s a wish. a wish for the most part is just wishy washy thinking. besides, in this city, no dream can become true unless there’s a sacrifice or if you’re a corpo rat.”

“ was our ma’s dream for us to be at the top of the arasaka’s tower ‘wishy washy’ too? “ his voice quivered, you don’t know if it was out of anger or sadness. perhaps both.

letting out a long exhale, you just shrugged. was her dream wishy washy? ideally no, realistically yes. unless you dedicated half of your life to kissing corpo ass while losing yourself in the process, there is absolutely no way to even achieve such a dream as poor, santo domingo babies. but, that was gloria’s dream and even if it was a fairytale, you and david tried anyway to make your mother happy.

“ you know, if she were to say, i want my children to be the most influential peeps in night city! “ you made an attempt to copy gloria’s accent jokingly, david cracks a small smile. “ that may sound like the most ridiculous dream ever coming from our backgrounds but since we love our mother so much—we’d do our best to make it come true anyways. .no matter how impossible it may be. but to answer your question, bro. .yes and. . no if it came with a sacrifice.”

the tone of your voice goes grim, the sinking feeling in your chest heavies down on your heart. david swallows thickly, his fists tightens in his pockets, a bead of sweat rolls down the side of his face.

“ what kind? “ david replies tentatively, glancing down at you with a nervous look.

“ losing yourself. arasaka is full of rotten characters, you can’t go at the top if you’re just your authentic self, you know. “

the screeching sound of the incoming train hits your ears and you stand up, watching the transport timely arrive at the station. you stroll over to the train and stepped inside once the doors opened with david following along. “ i refuse to lose myself and be seen as those toe-lickin’ losers. you experienced the way they treated those who weren’t like them in the academy. i can’t believe we had to put up with those suckers, “ you grunted, finding a seat next to the door and plopped down. “ be good, don’t let them get to you, blah blah—. .oh mother. if it wasn’t for her, i would of been the one to get exiled first. would of loved to kicked the shit out of that one cockroach who did nothing but patronized me for the smallest shit. but, it made me feel better that you sucker punched that asshole who knocked you on your feet. i still don’t approve of you implanting that sandev behind my back and using it right after though. “

david shrugs, taking his hand out of his pocket to grasp one of the bars to hold onto as the train departs after the passengers aboard. he looks out through the window, eyes trained on the arasaka tower in the far distance. he begins to tap his right foot. “ had no choice. was out of options and couldn’t let that bastard go after he talked shit about you and our ma’s death. can you honestly blame me? you would of done the same, right? ” david’s grip on the metal bar tightens; the corner of his caramel eyes sharpens. the leftover anger slowly rises up his throat as if it was a lanky hand.

without a second thought, you instantly responded back darkly, hands clenched into a tight ball—so tight that your nails was starting to create crescents into your skin. “ i would of done much worse to him. “

you zipped up your hoodie all the way to your neck, shivering from the cold air nibbling at the areas of your exposed skin. why the hell does it feel like it’s 50 degrees tonight?

“ looks like you should of brought a bigger jacket tonight. ” lucy commented, humor hinted behind the rasp of her voice. she stands at the edge of the dock, throwing you a side glance. like the last few fridays and mondays you and david been jogging with her, she wore the same neon and pink-colored tracksuit that complimented her figure perfectly. you hate the fact that you have to rip your gaze away from her figure to respond to her properly.

“ i’m good, choomba. i’ll warm up once we start. david, you ready? “

“ yeah. “ david answers, taking his hands out of his pockets besides you.

lucy takes it upon herself to start the jog, getting a head start past you and david. you trail behind her and the younger boy does the same. usually the jogs last about twenty minutes, just a few laps that ends with you wanting a hot shower and a feeling of satisfaction after a long day of bullshit. cardio helps clear your mind.

“ you not gonna talk to her? “ david whispers to you, maintaining a moderate speed. you raise a brow, still looking ahead, more so at lucy’s back.

“ why should i? continue to talk to her like you have been for the past nights we’ve been running together, davi. “

“ think you should on this one ‘cus how else do you want her to apologize to you if you’re acting like you’re not interested in talkin’ to her? “

you snorted, “ huh. all of a sudden you’re the relationship expert, is that right? “

david clicks his tongue, “ fuck off. i’m tryin’ to help you out. the way you’re oglin’ her makes you look like a loser. “

“ fuckin’ rich comin’ from you. “ you blurted out, rolling your eyes. he let out a grunt and nudges your arm with his elbow.

“ go, you gonk. “

letting out a deep sigh, you sped up just enough to catch up to lucy, matching the same pace as her. clearing your throat, you open your mouth to awkwardly speak, “ so. . lucy, it’s been a minute since we’ve chatted it up. “

“ mhm. it has. “ she responds back blandly, not sparing you a glance. yup, her walls are definitely and rightfully up.

“ how have you been holding up since our last gig yesterday? “

“ pretty nova. can’t really say much since the gig was like any other gig i’m use to. . how about you, newbie? “

you scoffed, “ hey, it’s only been. .like four weeks! don’t call me that, geez. but i can say nova too. the gigs are something i can get used to. it’s gonna be a pain in my ass to watch over that boy behind us too.”

“ hey, i can still hear you! “ david shouts in the distance, lagging behind as his feet began to burn.

“ how about you focus on catching up, short legs!” you half-shouted and laughed, throwing a quick middle finger at him. since you’re like two inches taller than him along with having good stamina from running around in the streets of santo domingo a little longer than david, it was pretty easy to outrun him. but now that he has a sandevistan, you hate to admit that he can compete with you if he used it.

“ you should worry a little more about yourself too.” lucy suggests, barely out of breath as she counts the second lap in her head.

“ huh? “

“ you’re the same as david in terms of experience. actually, if shit were to truly go down, he would have a better chance at surviving cus’ of the sandev he has. you don’t have any implants that can give you an advantage over a punk one on one. “

you hum at her criticism, beads of sweat dripping down your chin. adrenaline rushes into your veins, pumping you with natural energy to continue your jogging. however, you’re beginning to get tired and you’re starting to become slow, yet, you don’t stop. “ that’s true lucy. m‘not even mad at that. gonna make somethin’ work in the future so i won’t be a deadweight to you and the others. wanna protect david too cus’ he’s all i have. “

the older girl stays silent for a few moments, allowing your soft huffs and puffs to take over the silence to think about her next response. the question that sat on her tongue for the past few weeks runs off and slips through her lips.

“ is that what makes you serious about edgerunning?”

“ definitely. “ you say with full confidence.

she gives you a little look from the corner of her eye and stops abruptly. you stop too and hunched over to catch your breath. you think you’re on your third lap now without stopping? you and lucy are still in the area around the shore post. david is no where to be found but you know he isn’t far away. he won’t get lost if he keeps running straight.

“ what’s wrong—“

“ here. full training regimen. for you and david. you two are on your own after today. won’t hold your hands anymore. “ lucy hands you a chip and you examine it in your palm. she continues, “ if you’re serious about this, you’re gonna need to keep up. and then. .”

you lift your confused gaze at her and she stares back with a neutral expression. what is she thinking right now? “ and then. .? “

you blink several times as she simply turns on her heel and jogs off ahead, not even attempting to finish her prep talk.

“ that’s a start. . “ you mumbled, turning your head to the direction you and lucy previously ran from and saw david finally catching up. you cast him a proud smile, waving at him as he runs up, breathless.

“ wh-where’s lucy? “

“ she went on ahead. she gave us a little parting gift, i’ll tell you what happened on our way back home. “

—

“ your punches are lacking today! what’s the problem, kid? “ dorio inquiries with concern, steadying the heavy punching bag in place before stepping over to you. running a hand through your (h/c) hair, you just sighed dejectedly. lately, you been thinking about lucy and it’s starting to become pathetic. you want to understand her. you want a answer on why she really showed you the brain dance of the moon. was it to just stall? did she truly deceive you? how much was it real? fake? was her wondrous laughter and pretty smiles genuine?

“ sorry, just been thinking, that’s all, ‘rio. “

she swings an arm around your shoulders firmly, “ well, spill it. i’m here to talk with ya. “ the encouraging smile on her face made your guard loosen.

“ i’ve. . .been thinkin’ about lucy. “

“ figured so. “

“ huh? “ you whipped your head up at the much taller and older woman with a surprised expression. she just continues to smile, this time, knowingly. “ maine had a talk with david yesterday and he told me all about what’s going on between you and lucy. i gotta say, a date to the moon? even that didn’t happen for me and maine on our first date! it was just full of cracking’ heads and thrill! “

your nose scrunched up, “ aw fuck, you and maine? ew—“ she ruffles your head roughly and bellows out a laugh.

“ ah, shut up! anyways, what’s got you thinkin’ about her? still upset that she turned you and david over to us after the date? “

you nod your head, shifting your gaze down at your feet, “ yeah. jus’ wanna know if everything was real or fake. dunno what to really do. “

“ hmm, i see. well, after the biz tomorrow, how about you try to talk to her. it’s about damn time you suckers chat it out. you’re just like your lil bro, mopin’ around n killin’ the vibe. cheer up. i bet if you stop draggin’ your feet like that and brighten up that pretty face of yours, he would too. “

you sighed, fixing up your tousled hair as the experienced merc backs off. “ i guess. but hey ‘rio, gotta question. “

“ lay it on me. “

“ how long has lucy been a edgerunner? “

a pensive look dawns on dorio’s features as she thinks, resting a finger under her chin. “ mm, maybe bout a year so? kiwi took her in and the rest was history. before all of that, i dunno much about lucy. so far, she’s been pullin’ her own weight in the crew so that’s all that matters. anyways, i gotta delta. gonna go meet with maine to discuss detes about tomorrow, see ya kid. “

dorio leaves you alone to your thoughts. you exhale through your nose and went over to the skinny, tall table to turn on the radio. using the knob, you glossed over radio channels until it was a certain channel that you usually listen to— 98.7, body heat radio. you tune the volume just enough for you to vibe. dragging your feet over to the couch, you plant your butt on the down on the cushion. you leaned back against the head and closed your eyes.

“ you are now listening to chest pain by malcom todd. “

my chest is hurting, my feet can’t fall out of bed

i don't know where to go, so I'll lay here instead

with my symptoms, symptoms of sorrow and dread

they all said it would fade but again and again

suddenly, the sound of an incoming call rings through your reception and you groan out loudly in irritation. peeling one eye open, you’re surprised to see the principal of your former academy calling you. “ the fuck is this. . “

i loveee, i loveeee

i love, i love, i love,

you accepted the call.

“ hello, good evening, (name). how are you—“

i loveee, i loveeee

“ cut the crap, what is it? should there be a reason why you’re calling me when i—no, me and david, left the academy weeks ago? “

“ a-ah, sorry for bothering you. i. .in fact reached out to your brother and he abruptly hanged up while i was trying to explain to him—“

you snorted, “ oh, is that so? i’ll do the same then. go burn in hell, we will never go back to that stuck-up academy. maybe treat your poor students better. our mom technically died ‘cus of you, shitface. “

without an ounce of guilt, you ended the call, leaving behind a bubbling sense of triumph. did that man take you for a fool? there’s no way he would call you without an ulterior motive.

phonk music blasts loud in your ears as people danced off on the dance floor, drunk and possibly high off their asses. you ran your fingers through your hair, occasionally sipping on a carbonated drink that’s been shoved into your hand by rebecca. you’re not the one to party, you’ve discovered that after being brought to afterlife for the first time a few weeks ago. the stench of the night city’s most wasted characters made your nose roll up with disgust. strangers grinding and rutting up against each other; the club life wasn’t for you.

“ wassup, cutie! whaddaya doin’ sittin’ here by yaself? ” rebecca plops down onto the booth beside you, beer in hand. her petite frame flush against your side, not caring about personal space. since it’s rebecca, you don’t really care. you grew to like her quite a bit, she’s straightforward and honest, something you don’t really see much in night city. rebecca is really fun to hang with, the type to put a smile on your face whenever you’re upset.

“ hey bec, just chillin’ here. don’t really like partyin’ all that much. “

“ aww, that’s too bad! “ she takes a long swig of her beer before she continues, “ choom, you should of seen the way your bro was dancin’! it gotta be the funniest shit i’ve ever seen! “

you break into laughter at the imagine of david trying to show off by performing horrible dance moves. you’re not good at dancing either but you knew better than to embarrass yourself. “ that dumbass. i guess we gotta let him have it since the gig went well, yeah? “

“ oh fasure’! now it got me wonderin’ about what’s your groove like! ” she nudges your arm with hers, giving you a cheeky smirk. you playfully roll your eyes, “ is this your way of asking me to dance with you, ‘bec? “

exhilarated and tipsy, she immediately responds back with, “ hell yeah! c’mon, let’s get on the dance floor! “

“ jus’ kidding, girl. i think i’ll sit here and drink until it’s time for us to go. “

“ ugh, i’ll let you slide this time, only cus i like ya! “

you chuckled, swirling the carbonated drink around, its contents swooshes around in the glass bottle. “ i’m honored, choom. “

the pout on her purple, painted lips goes unnoticed by you.

a question pops into your head and your smile falters. “ hey bec. “

“ what’s up, choom? “ she leans into you, taking note of your expression changing into a small frown.

“ what’s it like to have pilaf as your bro? “

she immediately scoffs, crossing her legs, and leans back into the couch. “ like shit. he’s the absolute fuckin’ worst. the biggest dickhead ever. “

you raise your brow, the single side of your lips curling upward at the distasteful insults towards her brother.

“ but at the end of the day, he’s my bro. all i have is him and all he has is me. but, if the day were to come for him to he gets zero’d, i want it to be by me. “

“ why? “

“ cus’ i rather for it to be me than some lowlife gonk. ”

you hum before taking the last swig of the drink and set it down on the table in front of you. “ fucked up but i get it. .yet, if i had the choice to zero david, i’d blow my brains out. don’t have the heart to do it to my own brother. . “

she pats you on the back before rubbing it through your graphic shirt. “ and that’s okay, choom, “ you look at her and you’re met with a honeyed, easy smile that’s only reserved for a selective few and meant to plug the doubts pooling from the pores of your skin as it seeps through your troubled expression. “ you’re not s’pose to anyways, don’t let this damned city tell you otherwise. my case is just special for me and my bro. “

you can’t help but smile back at rebecca with warm appreciation.

“ thank you bec. “

“ anything to see ya pretty smile, dimps! “

after chatting with rebecca, you decided to get up to go to the restroom. you dread going to the public restrooms in clubs you’ve recently been to after gigs, because you’re guaranteed to see some drunkie puking their guts out in the next stall over. god, the strong smell of vomit and vodka makes you wanna hurl too. on the way there, you pass by the bar, catching a glimpse of lucy sitting by herself. she looks distant and uninterested in the energy around her as she quietly smokes to herself. maybe it wouldn’t hurt to hold your bladder for a bit to provide her some company. before you can even step into the netrunner’s direction, pilar beats you to her out of no where. he hops onto an empty stool beside her—not considering her personal space as he swings a lanky arm around her shoulders.

your teeth digs into your fleshy bottom lip from the irritating sight of that gonk trying to flirt with her. pilar gets touchy with her at every chance he fucking gets. doesn’t he get that lucy clearly doesn’t fuck with him? she even fried him a few times for being all grabby.

“ tch, “ you force your eyes away from them and back to what’s ahead of you. the tightness of your chest might get worse if you continue to hear that fucker pilar’s obnoxious laughter and his failed attempts of trying to impress lucy.

“ what’s with that face, sweetness? “

a brunette woman who looks to be in her mid-late twenties smoothly gives you a side hug, casting you a flirtatious smile. she smells of vanilla and alcohol.

“ sorry, that’s nun of your biz. i was on my way to the restroom. “ you answered back dryly, attempting to brush her off and she holds on a little tighter in response. growing bashful under her now seductive gaze and increasingly annoyed at a stranger hugging you without your consent, you smack your lips.

“ is that so? maybe. . afterwards, “ she leans in closer to your face and you uncomfortably tilt your head away. “ we can cool that heat off your face, it doesn’t fit you~ “ she purrs.

your brows knit together in agitation, without thinking twice, you shove her off your body. she nearly stumbles into another stranger.

“ christ, you know nothing about me. don’t you tell me what fits me. “ you snarled as you brushed passed her, disregarding the offended look on her face. the audacity. “ go find some other gonk who actually wants to be blowed by some stranger in here. “

you stomped off to the back for the restroom. in the back of your mind, you knew that you mostly overreacted and let your previous frustrations out on her. but did you regret it? no.

unbeknownst to you, a pair of sharp pastel eyes observed the whole interaction.

“ woah, hey there, partner! “ a familiar southern voice calls out as you unexpectedly bump into his body after exiting the shitty restroom too quickly. you grunted, one second away from snapping on the man for the collision but you stopped once you’ve recognized him.

“ falco? watch where you going, choomba. i almost fell on my ass! “

“ likewise, kiddo! sheesh, “ he combs his fingers through his maintained hair. “ don’t think i seen ya with the crew. david is quite the trickster when he’s all loosened up. “

“ i heard from bec. i was just drinking in another booth with her. not really used to parties. davi is quite the pleaser so you’ll see that more times than not. glad he’s having fun though. “

falco chuckles huskily, “ oh, i get it. i woulda figured you’re not a people person too with that short fuse of yours. “

“ oh, fuck you. i’m not short-tempered! after what i’ve gone through, i just despise how night city serves me bullshit in a sliver plate. “ you crossed your arms, tapping your foot subconsciously. falco looks down at your foot tapping, your arms tucked tightly to your chest, and lastly, the frown on your lips.

his thick brows raises. all telltale signs with those who has short patience. though, the foot tapping habit is something he’s noticed between you and david. you both do it out of anxiety. he signs heavily, stepping aside the doorway to the restrooms and leaned against the tile wall. “ listen, (name). word of advice from a older folk like myself. i heard about what happened to you and the boy’s mother and my condolences. i don’t know much about your stories before that, but, don’t let your anger get the best of you. i tell that to rebecca because she herself is quite similar to you when it comes to short fuses. although, i can say she’s more mature since she’s been in the game for a hot minute and is familiar with the ins and outs of night city. the more you let shit get to you while walkin’ on the edge, the quicker and harder you fall. “

you stay quiet, soaking in his speech word by word. so far, you gotten a few cuts and nasty bruises from picking fights during negotiations in recent gigs because of the shady insults and sneaky looks thrown your way. things probably would of been smoother for you had you swallowed up your anger and let things play out differently. it wasn’t like you’re still in the academy and only getting written up for disobedience. this time, the consequences are colorful while running on the edge; a barrel of a gun pressed ever so lovingly against your forehead, sprawled out unconscious or dead in some landfill, or a unrecognizable face at the hands of some chrome’d up punk.

“ . . .i understand falco. i’ll try to keep that in mind.”you relented, hands dropping at your side and your body posture slowly relaxing. a long puff of air runs past your lips.

he merely grins at you, placing a palm on your shoulder and pats it proudly. “ good. ‘member, if you’re ever stuck in a pitch, don’t forget to holler. i’m gonna go inside of here. the crew is going to be leavin’ in a few, tell em’ i’ll be out after i’m done. “

you nod with a small smile and he cruises past you to enter inside the restroom.

returning back to the front, you only see david and lucy standing in front of the bar. although lucy was the first to quietly notice you walking up, david acknowledges you with a half wave.

“ yo, you catch falco? we were waiting on you and falco. he’s our ride back. the crew’s gonna delta soon, they’re outside. “

“ in the back taking a piss. give him a few. i’m gonna go tell the others before—“

“ nah, i got it first. “ david chimes, already pacing towards the only exit to alert the others. before he runs off, he sends you a sneaky grin.

“ that boy. . “ you groaned.

“ mm, that boy indeed. “ lucy rasps, crossing her arms over her chest, looking seemingly bored. you feel a little discouraged by her closed-off body language.

“ we might as well go after him. falco’s gonna be out any sec now. “

“ good idea. “

you glanced at her, a single brow curled. was that sarcasm?

walking after the chocolate-haired boy who’s most likely already alerted the others and is waiting with them by the ride, you make an attempt to spark up a conversation.

“ what are you going to be doing tonight, lucy? “ you inquired, awkwardly tucking your hands into your washed jean pockets.

“ nothing important. I’ll prob just go home and sleep early for tomorrow’s gig. “

“ yeah? “

“ mhm. “

you nearly cringe at how awkward you’re making this. it’s not helping that lucy isn’t even feeling you like that. the seasoned edgerunner side eyes you as you release a soft, frustrated sigh.

“ lucy. .after this gig tomorrow, i want to—no, sorry, can we talk? that’s if you’re comfortable. “

a short pause briefly sits in-between you and her.

“ . . sure. “ lucy says softly, cool air tinged with strong tobacco welcomes you and the aforementioned girl as you exited lizzie’s bar to join the others.

—

“ you’re not gonna tell me how was it? “ david spoke out, lounging on the couch shirtless. empty spray cans and paper with symbol designs are scattered about all over the coffee table. you stood by the window, gazing up at the moon solemnly. for the past hour he’s been designing a symbol to represent he’s an edgerunner on the back of his jacket. you’re not really creative like him and you rather not ruin your favorite leather jacket by some cheap spray paint. the leather jacket was gifted to you by gloria on your nineteenth birthday.

“ how was what? “

“ you and lucy. “

you just shrug, fighting the urge to not cringe at the flashbacks from earlier.

“ pretty nova. gonna get a chat in with her after tomorrow’s gig. hopefully we can comb things out. “

“ that’s preem! make sure to bring up the brain dance and how you feel about her too. “

you chuckled, “ oh i will, wingboy. “

“ fuck that, you mean wingman. “

“ okay, bird chest. “

“ fuck you! “

you rolled your eyes and waved him off, walking over to your room.

“ yeah whatever. good night, davi. make sure to clean up that mess after your done. don’t wanna ruin the new apartment we’ve just moved into after combining our hard earned eddies. “

the apartment wasn’t much different from the last. just a different mega building to avoid the shitty landlord gloria had to deal with and to have a proper two bed apartment. at least your current one was more understanding.

“ yeah, i know. g’night. “

—

the gig was short n’ sweet. the objective was to neutralize a shady business owner in 5th street, watson, kabuki who’s made under the table deals with maelstrom. although, you and david didn’t really kill anyone, you did happen to find the owner in the secret basement—who in fact was a raging, middle-aged japanese man you had to pistol whip the fuck out for trying to be bold while he was actively cornered by you and david.

david was quick to comm the location of the man to kiwi. within a minute, maine and dorio arrived, guns pointed on him. the man was flatlined before he can utter a string of curse words out.

“ geez, nothing beats going to a bar after a gig. “ you stretched your arms out in the air, dragging your feet across the asphalt, and walking side by side with your crew in northside, watson.

“ since when did you enjoy bars? yesterday night, it looked like you didn’t want to be there. “ kiwi mentions, skeptical about your sudden change of heart.

maine added in, “ kiwi’s right about that. your little ass wasn’t with us, i think i seen ya somewhere in a different booth tryna be all mysterious n’ shit. why ya flippin’ the switch now? “

you rubbed the back of your head sheepishly, “ i just want to loosen up for a change. y’know, be different?”

“ yeah, you sure was! “ pilar jibes with a mocking grin, “ i showed this gonk one of the most vanilla braindances that bar offered—two seconds in, they got all flustered and pussied out over a pair of tits! even your lil bro handled it better than you! “

your face heats up with embarrassment at the sounds of laughter from other crewmates. “ shut the hell up, cockface, it’s not like i see pairs of tits enough to get desensitized from it! “

“ i’m surprised. i thought you would be considering your looks. “ kiwi chuckles, “ maybe it’s the tantrums? “

“ i do not have tantrums! davi, back me up! “

david gives you a lop-sided grin and shrugs, enjoying the bonding time he’s having with his new family.

“ i can’t say you do, can’t say you don’t. “

“ fuckin’ bastard—“

“ hey, what’s that sound? “

everyone goes quiet. the consistent noise of liquid splashing against a metal container hits your ears and your head turns to the source of it. there’s a raggedy homeless man standing ontop of the red crate, pissing.

“ aye, quiet down! “ pilar demands, breaking the uncomfortable silence as he stomps his feet.

“ you pissin’ up there? “

“ ugh. “

“ ew, gross. “

“ but why though. . “ you mumbled in utter disgust.

pilar gets aggravated at the man for ignoring him and bangs his golden, bawled up fist against the crate.

thump! thump!

“ i’m talkin’ to you! why you pissin’ up there like that?!”

thump!

“ that’s enough pilar, leave him alone. “

“ buh bye, bro. “

everyone but david walks forward, leaving pilar to confront the man while the young edgerunner watches in a mix of interest and shock. you don’t realize david stopped walking until moments later, a loud bang pierces through the atmosphere.

pilar’s nagging abruptly stopped and splatters of blood lands on your jacket.

everything happened so quick, you yelling at your brother to move while sprinting for some cover with the others, maine screaming in david’s face to move while he’s frozen in one place.

“ it’s a cyberpsycho! “

the announced cyberpsycho readies his projectile launcher system at the two who’s still out in the open and fires. maine roughly kicks the stunned david out of the way just in time for the explosive to narrowly miss them.

“ that crazed bum flatline’d pilar! “ you yelled, pulling out your iron from your jacket pocket.

“ yeah, he capped him! “ dorio adds, pulling out her own weapon from behind some cover next to you.

“ i think i have some pilar on me. “ kiwi mumbles with disgust, laying low next to dorio. why did she say it so casually? wasn’t that her crew mate?

“ gimme that! “ enraged by her brother’s death, rebecca snatches dorio’s gun and wildly rushes out of safety and towards the man, and starts spraying at his direction with dual pistols.

“ cocksucker! you had no fuckin’ right! “ she screams on the top of lungs, not even aiming correctly due to her seething anger. once her pistol was out of bullets, she angrily tosses it aside, and sprints towards her brother’s killer with dorio’s.

“ fuckin’ cyberpyscho trash! “ none of her bullets was hitting during her frenzied shooting. maine snatches her petite form with him behind cover as a another projectile hurdles several inches away her previous spot. not even a moment in his grasp and she thrashes out of it and snags maine’s ak.

in another failed attempt to shoot him, she hazardously mishandles the weapon and judder backwards due the powerful recoil and her small body. the bullets only dented the metal of the crate. the cyberpyscho readies his arm again to shoot another explosive and kiwi swiftly resets rebecca’s system by maine’s command, her body drops to the floor.

another explosive goes off and you frantically peek behind cover, looking for your brother who’s nearby, hiding behind a crator. “ david! you okay?! “

“ yeah! “ he yells back, “ where’s lucy?! “

fuck, lucy! your eyes search through the temporary smoke and scattered debris ahead and you spot her hidden behind the exact barrel where the man is standing on top of. your heart stops at the discovery, the grip on your iron’s handle grows tight. why the hell did she decide that spot was okay? what did it for you was lucy attempting to fry and neutralize the cyberpsycho which failed terribly. the man burst into flames but doesn’t even react to it and instead, blindly shoots a projectile near where’s she hidden. unspeakable anger instantly running through your veins, you compromise yourself by sprinting out of cover and towards the fucker.

“ that’s enough, you mindless cockhead! “ you barked, ignoring the man getting ready again to use another projectile.

“ (name), no! stop! “ lucy pleads, helplessly watching you risk your life just to see her.

all of his shots so far were erratic which means his aim is too. it’s a gamble but you’re willing to bet your life on it. your heart is beating out of your rib cage, rushing blood into your veins, beads of sweat rolls down your brow as you push your organic legs to the best of your human ability.

the projectile goes off, flying straight towards you but you keep running, not caring about the shouting around you, telling you to move out the way from getting flatlined.

“ you little shit! move— “

like what you predicted, the projectile narrowly misses your head by an inch and you quickly close the distance between you and your target.

bursting with adrenaline, you use the momentum to kick up the barrel and fling your body onto the platform. within a single breath, you pistol whipped the man and aimed the barrel of your gun right between his eyes.

“ the more you let shit get to you while walkin’ on the edge, the quicker and harder you fall. “ falco’s word rings through your head as you pull the trigger. a single shot pierces through the chaotic atmosphere, seemingly putting the bizarre situation to an end.

the man’s blood splatters all over your face.

after watching his body fall, you rush over to the edge to check on lucy.

“ lucy—please tell me you’re alright! “

she briefly eyes the worried look on your bloodied face and give you a small, assuring smile.

“ i’m alright. “

“ preem. i’m so relieved. “ you grinned toothily, not before it falters from the sight of blood running down the side of lucy’s face as she pensively gazes at you.

you gasp, “ you’re bleedin’! “

unbeknownst to you and to lucy’s horror, the cyberpsycho’s projectile launcher is aimed straight at your head. not even a half a second later, another shot rings out. this time, by david being the one to confirm the kill through his own panic and anger. flashbacks of you and his mother flows through his head while his finger was pressed on the trigger.

that was the first time he killed someone.

“ move, kid! “

maine quickly shoves david aside and punches the cyberpsycho’s head clean off before his decapitated body falls.

“ fuck! “ rebecca blows his severed head off with her shotgun as it lands at her feet. “ he was mine to kill and you took that from me! “

she blows off the remainder of pilar’s head and spits her gum out on her brother’s killer splattered head too. the guy was a dickhead but you give him your respects because he’s rebecca’s brother. you don’t know if you should try to comfort rebecca while she’s in a furious state like that.

“ don’t touch me. .! “ lucy brushes off dorio’s hand, denying her aid after her senior verbally points out the bleeding wound.

“ you’re hurt, need a booster? “

“ dorio, take the girl to go see a ripperdoc. “ maine turns to you and david, “ you two go with them. me and kiwi gotta stay behind and explain this cluster fuck of a mess. someone’s gotta do it. we’ll just tell them what that pig did to pilar and they’ll write this off as a cyberpsycho incident. “

“ nova. . “ you mumble, tapping your foot impatiently, and crossing your arms over your chest. all you want right now is to wash your face and take a nice shower to wipe the grime off your skin.

“ both of you, ‘saw what you did back there. the freezing’ up and almost gettin’ flatlined by that dirtbag cus’ of leapin’ straight to danger like a dumbass willin’ to risk it all was a rookie mistake. high-time you kids learn to stop thinking like a rookie. “

irritated, you roll your eyes, turning your head away and david says nothing, dropping his gaze to his feet in shame.

what you did wasn’t a rookie mistake.

“ huh, who’s there? “ the doc peeks through arrays of cybernetic arms and grunts with annoyance, “ you again? y’all know i’m not a licensed physician, right?” he reminded in a grumble, frowning at the three unwanted guests standing by the doorway of his illegal clinic.

“ doesn’t matter. i didn’t come here by choice anyways. “ lucy replies dryly, stepping inside, “ i’m going in alone. “ she throws you a seemingly cold glance and the door shuts behind her.

that girl sure can act nonchalant when she wants to be. you sighed, shifting your weight onto the other foot.

“ (name). make sure you get lucy home and cleaned up. david, come with me. i’ll ride you back. “ dorio offers, gesturing for your brother to follow along with her to his car.

“ o-oh, sure. “

“ w-wait, what? sure, but what about me and lucy’s ride back? “ you asked nervously with furrowed brows. you gotta talk to her anyways but setting you up like this is criminal—especially when your face is covered with subhuman blood.

“ maine said you can take his wheels. c’mon david. “

he’s apart of this too?

“ fine, b-but gimme a towel! and you make sure to get davi home and cleaned up too! “ you asserted, watching them walk away to dorio’s car.

“ that’s fine, i’ll come back to hand a towel to you from my ride. “

“ see ya at the crib, g’luck! “ david waves at you sheepishly. you just wave back, sneaking him a help me look. he gives you a cheeky thumbs up and turns his back on you.

that boy.

—

it’s been at least fifteen minutes since she’s been in and you’ve been idle near by, wiping the blood from your face. you really need to properly wash your face. you cringe at the disgusting feeling of the blood clogging up your pores.

“ fuck, this shit sucks. “ you murmur angrily.

the ripperdoc’s entrance door unexpectedly slides open and lucy casually walks out with a cigarette between her rosy lips. her gaze immediately falls onto you who’s crouched on the side. you lift your head up and grinned happily at the sight of her.

“ you’re back, lucy! let’s delta, m’gonna take you back to your place. “

she doesn’t object and quietly nods her head.

you can call yourself a decent driver. unlike david, gloria taught you how to drive. you honed your skills by driving around to do errands for her whenever she was tired from work. she’d always insist on going on her own but eight times out of ten; you’d convince her to not push herself than she already has. hell, you even helped david hustle his xbds gigs by driving him around to clients in santo domingo. there was a few predicaments where things got a little thin thanks to david’s recklessness but you being his getaway driver made his lifespan longer. now, you and david look back at those situations and laugh.

“ so, how was the visit. did the doc treat you good? a shady lookin’ guy but he cares a bit. ” you say softly, eyes straight on the highway to westbrook.

“ mhm. he did. “

“ that’s nova. i got scared back there, you know. “

“ mm. . . “ lucy doesn’t say anything for a few moments which undoubtedly made you nervous. she just quietly looks out of the passenger’s window, either at the scenery or her reflection. you continue to drive for several minutes, patiently waiting for her response. though, each minute that passed started to get you more and more anxious.

“ . .you should really worry more about yourself. .” she speaks up, repeating similar words she said days back. you hum thoughtfully, adjusting the wheel slightly to make a turn off the highway and into japantown.

“ th-that’s fair. you told me this already. i know, but, ”you thought about the people who came into your life recently, the ones you disliked but grew fond of, the brother who you love to death, the deceased mother who’s dream you hold dear to you, and the girl next to you who you wish to get closer to. you have too many ties—you don’t have time to worry about yourself.

“ i can’t. “ you laughed bitterly, particularly at yourself, “ not when there’s those who i want to protect. “

lucy stays quiet, most likely soaking in your words without intentions of a response—a response that might expose how she really feels. she pushes back the urge of wanting to talk further and doesn’t say anything.

you don’t say anything at first either and silently turned on the radio to your favorite channel.

“ . . .this channel is my fav. i always listen to this when my mind’s clogged up. well—that or lookin’ at the moon.” you admitted, making another right to a narrow street.

heartache, she only doin' what she know

weekends, get it poppin' on the low

better days comin' for sure

“ ‘eyy. i love vibin’ to this song. it’s a classic. “ you laughed softly, nodding your head to the beat. lucy throws you a side glance, the corners of her gaze softens. she’s not used to seeing you so relaxed like this. she won’t lie and say that you your best like this—smiling prettily and into your own element. her heart feels soft embers in her chest.

“ it goes in, out, do it real slow. . — “

“ right here. “

you quickly stopped in front of her apartment, mostly out of surprise because you almost missed her street.

“ a-ah, sorry. “

“ you’re good. nice voice by the way. “ she compliments, getting out of the vehicle and you follow suit.

“ yeah, right. ‘m no singer. “ you deny, trailing behind her into mega building h8. she begins to walk up the stairs to her floor.

“ can be if you tried. “

“ whatev. “ you’d mutter, tucking your hands into your leather jacket. fuck, you still not done talking to her and she already reached her unit, stepping towards the door of her apartment. you bite into the inner flesh of your cheek.

“ g’night. “ she says, putting in the code and entered inside of her apartment.

“ h-hey, lucy, wait! we st-still gotta talk s’more! “ you stammered, feeling embarrassed about waiting until the last second to stop her.

a moment later, she steps right back out, looking over at you blankly. you swallow thickly.

“ this way. “

she leads you to the roof, on a small platform where you and her have the perfect view of the large moon above. you sat down with her, crossing your legs.

“ this spot. .you come here often? “

“ yeah, to clear my mind. “

“ i see. “ you look up at the moon, a sense of longing washes over you.

“ that bd of the moon we did. .it was like a breath of fresh air. i liked it. “ you smiled awkwardly.

“ actually, i have something i want to talk about too. remember that night we met? what i said back then? i know how it must look but i wasn’t lying. it was true. that was the first time i’ve ever told and shared anybody that. “

“ yeah, i should of figured from the way you looked so happy then. there’s no way you can act out such a killer smile. “

“ what if i’m acting now? “ even though you can’t exactly see her pretty face, you can hear the smile in her smooth voice.

“ oh, c’mon. “ you chuckled, leaning forward with a confident smile, “ i doubt it now. “

“ why not? “

“ you didn’t even look at me as you asked that. “

“ crazy. “

you prop an elbow on your knee and placed your chin on your palm. “ still wish you could of told me sooner though. “

“ couldn’t. “

“ why? “

there’s a melancholic tone to her voice as she replies, “ you were so mad at me then. “

“ yes, miss m’am. i was. “

“ see what i mean? “

“ but rightfully so. the pretty girl that revealed her biggest wish and treasure to me the first night i met her ends up fuckin’ me over—yeah i’d be all pissy for a while. though, i don’t hate you for that, just couldn’t. but, if i was hot hot about it, well, i wouldn’t have risked my life for you back there with that mad man.” you half-lied. even if you were that upset, you’d never let lucy get flatline’d like that.

the rainbow-haired girl scoffs, seeing right through your whimsy lie. “ liar. “

“ am not. “

“ is too. “

“ how? “

“ because you’re the type to jump into the fire to save someone, even if you know you’re going to get burned. that’s just who you are. “

your brows raise, “ and? would that make me a bad merc? “

“ didn’t say that. you’d make a good edgerunner, actually. you already are i think. “

you frown, “ so what’s the issue—“

“ you don’t make your name for yourself as a cyberpunk by how you live; but by how you die. “ lucy stands up abruptly as she continues, “ that’s not the life or end that you deserve, (name). “

you sprung up, shaking your head at her words, “ what do i deserve then? how am i different from you? “

“ a good life. me? i got nowhere else to go. this it it.”bullshit.

“ i don’t either—we all don’t! do you know what city we’re livin’ in right now? we’re more similar than you think, lucy! “ you argued back. she’s not even facing towards your direction, almost like she’s avoiding seeing your face. violet highlights compliments her form, produced by the city glows.

“ no, you and i are worlds apart—“

“ what? then tell me—in what way? lucy, please look at me! “

the netrunner bites her bottom lip in distress, gripping the back of her hair; right where she keeps a certain area hidden.

“ fuck, let’s go to the moon together, lucy! “ you declared, “ gonna make our wish–no your dream come true. m’gonna you there, that i promise! “

lucy paces over to you, cradles your cheeks with her palms, and brings you into a hasty kiss. she stuns you in pace. your eyes widen like saucers, body weightless, almost as if you were floating in space. in the distance, a rocket launches off into the air, racing into the sky just as fast as your heart racing onto your sleeve.

“ i don’t want you to die on me. . “ she whispers gently, retracting away to peer deeply into your widened eyes. there’s a passionate glint in her pastel hues in contrast to the still expression on her highlighted countenance. there has to be something more behind those blends of colors; a woeful past that has her expressing her fear like this. she adds pressure to her tender palms, pulling you back into reality from the weight of her touch.

without saying a word, you clumsily slot your lips between lucy’s, briefly and experimentally running your tongue through the parting opening of her mouth, and pulled away. previously surprised by your kiss, the older girl recovers and kisses you again with tongue. tobacco and a sweet twinge of carbonated soda explodes on your tastebuds. albeit clumsy, the strings kisses you shared between her were ardent and solidified a resolve within the pit of your heart.

“ i won’t die. �� you promised breathlessly against her soft lips, holding lucy close by the hips. “ now, i need something from you. two things i been wantin’ for the longest. “

“ say it then. . “ she whispers, traveling her hand down the lower half of your face. her thumb runs along the fleshy surface of your slightly swollen lips.

“ wanna apology for back then. haven’t heard you say sorry yet. “

“ you serious? “ she half chuckles, you rest your forehead against hers. you’re lucky to be the same height as lucy and not as david in this moment.

“ dead, prettiness. “ you tuck strands of hair behind her ear.

“ prettiness? you’re the one to talk. “

“ can it and gimme my apology. “

“ hmm. m’sorry. “ she drawls, returning to slide her hand down to the side of your neck sensually, pale knuckles brushing against your collar. even though you want more than a one word apology, you let it go, bewitched by her charms.

“ i’ll take it. next thing, be my girl. “

she breaks into a pretty smile, a small flush spread on her milky cheeks.

“ you’re really going all out, huh? “

“ you kissed me first. “

“ touché. ‘kay, sure. “

it’s your turn to grin happily, squeezing at her hips. “ now i feel fuckin’ preem. let’s get you inside now. “

you followed lucy off the roof and back to her door side by side. the warmth in your chest dampens once you fully realized that you won’t see her until tomorrow.

“ what’s with the puppy eyes? “ lucy queries, casting you a quick side glance before she punches the entrance code to her apartment. your heart gets caught in your throat and you stammer, “ n-nothing! m-my mind was elsewhere, lu’. “

she doesn’t react to her new nickname and positions her body towards you. despite the neutral expression she’s wearing, you can recognize the fondness in her eyes.

“ i’ll see you tomorrow, ‘kay? “ lucy lean forward and plants a short kiss on your lips. you bob your head, waving your hand meekly as she enters inside of her apartment. the netrunner spares you one last look over her shoulder before shutting the door behind her.

you let out the biggest sigh of relief in your life.

—

“ took you long enough. “ david greets you, sitting down on the couch, free of his jacket. it appears like he got rid of the bum’s blood stains from his face. walking inside, you kick off your shoes, and ambulating your way over to the living room with him.

“ my fault, probably should of taken the highway back. “ you sat down on the cushion beside him and leaned against his frame in a relaxed manner. david lets you without a protest.

“ not what i meant. looks like you n’ lucy made up. “

“ fuck off, what gave it away? “

“ you seriously askin’ me that? it’s all over your face, asshole. you were smilin’ like a loser when you came through the door. “

“ whatev. “

you rub the back of your neck and craned it side to side, attempting to ease the stiffness.

“ did you tell her what i suggested? “ he asked hopefully, fiddling around with his fingers. you hum back with confirmation, dropping your hand down on your lap to observe the small bruises from the stand off a few hours ago on your palm. they don’t really hurt and it’s already fading.

“ mhm, wingboy. i was going to do that anyways. “

david simply grunted, averting his gaze somewhere off into the room.

“ what she say? “

“ that everything she said back then was true and genuine. then something about me and her being different—that we’re worlds apart. “

“ huh? how so? “

“ dunno, looked like she didn’t wanna tell me. “

“ you think she’s hidin’ something? “

“ most likely. i promised lucy that i’ll take her to the moon, to make a dream come true though. “ you don’t tell him about the kiss(es).

david’s face crunch up with confusion as he recalls, “ didn’t you call that a wish and how it’s wishy washy? “

“ didn’t you call that poster she had on her wall a joke? “ you remarked, ruffling up his puffy mohawk. you always thought the mohawk looked goofy when he started rocking it years ago. david thought he looked so cool with a mohawk. he showed it to you one day after gloria took him to the barber with his chest all puffed out, looking ‘tough’. you never laughed so hard that day. now? the style definitely grew on you. the younger teen swats your hand away, huffing, “ you know i ain’t mean it like that. don’t spin this on me, asshole. answer the question! “

“ i did call it wishy washy. i guess it’s different with her. ‘spewed it at the heat of the moment but it came from my heart. i still intent to make her dream come true. i. .also got her to apologize too and we’re a thing. “

“ oh, that’s. . preem! totally didn’t expect that one comin’. i guess i should be promoted to wingman now, huh? “ he laughs and you laugh with him.

“ i guess i should for you helping out these past days, davi. “

silence momentarily fills the relaxed ambience of your shared apartment, you thought about the bd experience with her, the kiss, the way she looked in the eyes on that roof. your gaze softens and so did your tone as you asked your brother,

“ if you were in my shoes, would you have promised her that too? would you have done the same? “

david stays quiet for a moment before he replies meekly,

“ yeah. .i think i would have done the same for her too. “

you don’t miss the longing in his voice. guilt immediately washes over you.

david, you really are my wingman, aren’t you?

“ (name)? “

“ yea, davi? “ you respond, removing your iron from your belt and stood upright to take off your bloodstained jacket that you desperately need to clean.

“ . .didn’t you say dreams can’t come true without a sacrifice. .right? “

#cyberpunk edgerunners x reader #cyberpunk 2077 x reader #lucy kushinada x reader #lucy x reader #cyberpunk edgerunners #cyberpunk 2077

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bullet-prooflove · 6 months ago

Text

Safe: Leroy Jethro Gibbs x Reader

Tagging: @kmc1989 @riley-kore @ilovemark1951 @love-affair-with-fandoms @mishkatelwarriorgoddess

Companion piece to:

The Ice Queen - Gibbs meets The Ice Queen for the first time.

Break The Ice - A act of decency helps Gibbs to break the ice.

Umbrella - Gibbs gets more than he bargained for when he offers you his umbrella.

Grave - You and Gibbs bump into each other in an unexpected place.

The thing that Gibbs likes most about you is that you don’t give damn about what anybody else thinks. That becomes blatantly obvious over the months he continues works with you. You’re a consummate professional, a fierce victim advocate and the most compassionate woman he’s ever met.

The way you speak to the families, it’s an art form.

He could only wish for more people like you. People who haven’t become desensitised by everything they’ve seen. People who still give a shit.

“I don’t know how you do it.” He says to you one night over drinks at a bar he’s already forgotten the name of. “How do you stay sane after seeing so much death?”

Meeting up like this, it’s starting to become a regular thing between the two of you. You’ve been doing it ever since the day you ran into each other at the cemetery. Most nights he grabs a few drinks with his team but Thursdays, he reserves those especially for you.

“I know that people think I’m cold, detached…” You say as you swirl the ice cubes around whiskey glass. “But when I look down at them, I see the person they were. Lieutenant Colchester’s calloused fingers from where he played guitar, the scar on Ensign Lopez’s knee from a cycling accident. They all had hobbies, a life, people who care about them.” You take a sip from the glass. “I guess that makes me driven.”

“It’s a good way to be.” Gibbs tells you, his gaze meeting yours. “You fight for them, even when the lead on the case tells you, you shouldn’t.”

He’s talking about the blow up they all overheard coming from Family and Sexual Violence and Threat Management Unit this afternoon. You have a dead Corporal on your table and Special Agent in Charge LaRue is shoving the file to the bottom of the pile because the deceased used to be hook to put food on the table before she joined the service.

“I’m gonna be person non-grata in that department for a very long time.” You state as you signal to the bartender for another round. “They’ve already requested another M.E.”

“It was the right thing to do.” Gibbs tells you as if it’s something irrefutable.

That’s one of the reasons you like about spending time with Gibbs. There’s no platitudes, there’s only frankness. He’s a man without an agenda and you can not express just how refreshing that is.

“I know.” You say, pushing your used glass away from you. “I’d do it again in a heartbeat if I thought it would bring any of them justice.”

You damn well would too, he knows it.

It’s an hour later that he begins to tug on his jacket. It’s the same everytime. Eleven o’clock hits and he walks you home. Only tonight you aren’t pulling on your coat, your still sitting there, your finger tracing around the top of the glass you’ve been drinking from.

“Maeve?” He questions, tilting his head to meet your gaze.

“I think I’m gonna stay a while.” You tell him and he sits back down on his stool.

“Alright, well I’ve got nowhere else to be-”

“Jethro.” You say softly, your hand coming to rest on top of his ensuring you have his full attention. “You know that feeling you get, that frustration that builds and builds until you end up starting a fight. I get that too, only I fuck it out.”

“Oh.” He says as it dawns on him. “I’m cock blocking you.”

“You look like a big strapping Marine, ready to beat the shit out of anyone that approaches me.” You inform him and he supposes he kinda does.

“I’m not sure how comfortable I feel…” He begins because his momma taught him a lot better than to leave a woman alone in a bar.

“It’s not about your comfort.” You remind him, your voice turning brittle. “It’s about me getting what I need and what I need is to get fucked.”

He doesn’t like it, not because of the sex but rather the danger it presents. You’ll be taking home you don’t know, someone who could hurt you or worse. He also knows he can’t stop you, that you’re going to do this no matter what he says because it is a need, one that he recognises all too well.

“Will you call me or page me?” He asks you as he raises to his feet once again. “Just so I know you’re safe.”

You sigh, rapping your fingertips upon the surface on the table. He gets the feeling you aren’t used to people actually giving a shit about you. Well tough, he does and you’re just gonna have to get used to that.

“Maybe.” You concede. “If you leave within the next five minutes.”

Maybe…

That’s the best he’s gonna get for now.

It’s a couple of hours later that his pager chirps. He’s doing push ups in the dark on the bedroom floor, trying to chase away the images of another man touching you, tasting you, fucking you. He’s not a jealous man but he is protective, he would go to hell and back for the people he cares about and apparently you’re one of them. He picks up the tiny black device, his gaze fixating on the letters as they scroll across screen.

S-A-F-E.

Safe.

Love Gibbs? Don’t miss any of his stories by joining the taglist here.

Interested in supporting me? Join my Patreon for Bonus Content!

Like My Work? - Why Not Buy Me A Coffee

#leroy jethro gibbs #leroy jethro gibbs x reader #ncis origins #gibbs #gibbs x reader #austin stowell

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angelofsmalldeaath · 1 year ago

Note

I don’t know if your taking requests but I would love to read something about taking a bath with Andrew 🥰 anyway, I love you’re writing!!

this is genuinely the freakiest coincidence because i wrote half of this last night, wayyy before getting this request!! anon we share the same braincell

also thank you sm for reading!! i appreciate you very much 🤎🤎

cw: nudity (non-sexual), sappy and sickly sweet but at this point if you're coming here expecting anything else...idk what to tell you

“ah, you’re a sight for sore eyes,” he shuts the bathroom door behind him, shuts his eyes too and sighs for a long moment.

i flick some of my bath bubbles at him and squawk in mock outrage. “i’m naked in here, you know?”

still leaning against the door, he half-opens his eyes and smirks, “that supposed to deter me, darling?”

i take him in properly then—hair slipping out of his bun, messy, unruly, like he’s ran his hands through it quite a lot today. the sleeves of his sweaters are pushed up to his elbows. ink stains his fingers, calluses litter the palm of his hands.

“there’s no way the two of us are fitting in this together,” i laugh, “we’d spill water everywhere!”

“i’ll clean it,” he protests without missing a beat. “let me in? please?”

softness creeps into his features, the kind that melts my heart until it’s nothing but a beating mess at his feet. “get in,” i smile, “i’ve got a eucalyptus bubble bath going.”

sluggishly he begins to get out of his clothes—socks at first, tossed in one corner of the bathroom, then the sweater joins the pile. i stare at him, a bit mesmerised, at his stomach and chest and arms. all that skin on display, skin that i have touched and caressed and kissed a million times. and yet i feel breathless.

a moment later, he kneels by the tub, still in his jeans, and flicks a thumb at the corner of my lips. “got a bit of drool there, baby.”

i flush, and he steals a kiss, smug and satisfied.

“don’t be evil,” i pout, “i’ll uninvite you!”

“mm-hmm, and are you capable of that?”

i roll my eyes, trying to hide the smile creeping onto my face once again. it takes him a few more seconds to pull down his jeans, his boxers, and then i slide forward and make room for him.

the regret is instant. “oh my god,” i scrunch my eyes shut as water floods the bathroom, drenching the edges of his discarded clothes. all he does is laugh—impish and full of mischief. “god you’re lucky i love you!”

“i am,” he kisses the nape of my neck once he settles behind me, “i really am.”

his skin is warm when i settle against him. he smells like he always does—his cologne, day old now, the fabric softener he’s used since long before i knew him, and something that is entirely and inexplicably him. i breathe in deep until it fills my lungs, until the smell of eucalyptus almost disappears from the room.

“how was your day?”

“honestly?” he sighs, and starts a vague soapy doodle on my thigh. “it was a lot. not quite so physically, just…emotionally. i couldn’t wait to get back home to you.”

“yeah? that bad?”

“just hard…not bad. never bad.”

i nod, and trace a vein on his arm, leaving a soapy trail behind. silence settles over us for a few moments, occasionally broken by his small sighs. it’s nice, this—being able to feel his heartbeat against my body. absently, he hums a tune, something i haven’t heard before.

“that’s new,” i lean my head against his chest, relish the vibrations of his humming travelling through my body. “is it?”

“it is. nothing concrete, just something i’ve been toying around with.”

“‘s nice, sweet.”

“you think so?” he asks and i nod. after another moment of silence, he chuckles lightly, then tightens his hold on me. “maybe i’ll use it for a song about you. that’s a nice idea, isn’t it?”

“i didn’t know there were songs about me,” i giggle, and kiss the back of his hand, once and then once again for good measure.

“there are always songs about you,” he nuzzles his face into the crook of my neck, kissing the spot where my pulse is quite obvious. “in my head or my notebooks or on any scraps of paper i can get my hands on. always you.”

like he so often does, he leaves me speechless—stuck between blushing and welling up—until he flicks bubbles on me and the moment dissolves away.

“we should just get takeaway,” he declares innocently, like he hasn’t left me with a lump in my throat. “i just want to be lazy with you.”

i clear my throat, shake my head. “takeaway it is. i can order while you clean the bathroom, right?” i bite my lip and keep the laugh in.

he groans, huffs on my shoulder. “god, you’re lucky i love you!”

“i am,” i kiss his knuckles softly, knowing i mean every single word of it. “i really am.”

#i really really hope you like it!! you're my first request haha and i'm nervous to post this x #requests #hozier #hozier x reader #andrew hozier byrne #writblr #writeblr #writers on tumblr #andrew hozier byrne x reader #hozier fluff

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thevoidstaredback · 7 months ago

Text

Tales of Conquest, Warnings of Fools:

Letters Between Brothers

Damian Wayne, Feb. 16, 2012

It’s been exactly sixteen days since I found out that father went missing. It’s been fifteen days since I last wrote to you. I’m still waiting for an answer. Just in case, however, I’ve started to keep a closer eye on things here in Illinois. Once I’ve got an information network kind-of up and running, I’ll hopefully be able to keep an eye on a much larger area than just one state.

I can’t believe it took me this long to set up a web.

You’ll notice that there’s no return address on this letter. On the off chance that father going missing involves the Shadows somehow, I’ve decided to let this line drop. When If you decide to write to me again, the return will be the same as it was before. It’ll be the best way to reach me, unless you want to use the number from my first letter.

I have anything in my P.O. Box delivered to a secondary location where I can pick it up, as I told you before. I’ll check there as frequently as I can.

أتمنى أن يكون كل شيء على ما يرام

***

The letters were given to Damian by Alfred just as his Father had always been handed mail. They were set on a tray on a table near the front door and brought to the dining table just before lunch was served.

The mail had been piling up recently. Sure, they all saw the letters on the dining table, but no one had the energy to look at the names written on them. Fortunately, the ones on the top were addressed to Damian. Unfortunately, everything aside from the death of his Father had been pushed to his mind. It could all wait.

It wasn’t confirmed that Father was dead. In fact, their story for the public is that he was kidnapped, that they had hired some private investigators to look for him, and that they would pay any ransom asked as long as it was within their capabilities. It had been a long shot, but it was their final act of desperation. They were all prepared for the worst, though. Waiting for confirmation, evidence, that Father was truely dead was like waiting for the blade of a guillotine to fall. They would likely have to call it if he didn’t show up by year’s end.

Damian had only just gotten his Father, and now he was losing him. It wasn’t fair! Sent so far from home and to the house of a stranger, only to lose the man just as he’s getting attached! It was cruel. He could not bear the thought, so he ignored the letters with his father’s name. He ignored the letters with his name because he now held his father’s name.

Grayson was better at hiding his grief, trying to hold everything together, but it was obvious he, too, was falling into the same pit as the rest of them, only he was going to fall deeper. As much as it pained Damian to admit, Grayson was Father’s first chosen. He knew that what he felt at the loss of his Father, Grayson was feeling worse.

It would not do to compare grief, but he couldn’t help it. Grayson had been with Father the longest. Todd, while too angry to even fleetingly consider the idea of remaining a part of the family, was still Father’s first adopted. Drake, no matter how incompetent, had been the one to keep Father and Gotham well up until now. Damian had only been there, had only known Father, for a year.

Damian remembers the grief that had warped into anger. He remembers he and the people Father and Pennyworth insist are his brothers finding themselves and each other in the Cave, each of them intent on taking the Batman Cowl. After all, Gotham will not survive without Batman. None of them took it, though no one forgot it, either.

Todd and Drake had been the first two to fight over Father’s Cowl. Damian had net been allowed a mask, but he had helped to save Drake’s life after he fought Todd. He figures it was penance for attempting to kill him within his first month at the Manor.

Grayson had met Todd on the top of a moving train. No matter how much history the two had, being brothers and colleagues, their fight was inevitable. Grayson ended as the victor after knocking Todd off of the train.

Damian remembers the week after Grayson won. He stripped Drake of the title of Robin and gave it to Damian, while he became Batman. Drake had then left the country with the new name Red Robin.

While he knew that grief shows differently across the board, he knew it followed the same five steps. He was now at Acceptance. Grayson was stuck at Depression. Todd seemed to be stuck at Anger. But Drake was still at Denial.

However, Damian knew people who have died could still be alive. Grandfather, Danyal, and Todd. All three had died, and yet all three now walk amongst the living. Grandfather’s heart has to stop before the Pits can work to revive him. Danyal had not died and revived in the same sense, but he had been proclaimed and mourned. Todd had been killed and buried for six months before rejoining the living, as catatonic as he may have been. Why would Father be any different? Father could’ve faked his death for one reason or another, or he could’ve really died and it was only a matter of time before he came back!

Perhaps, Damian was still in Bargaining.

Death was a concept that he was intimately familiar with. There were ways to reverse its effects, and there were ways to make it more efficient. Father disappearing could mean anything.

This was all to say that Damian believed Drake. Father could be dead, but he could be alive. For as much as he hated Drake, Damian was not going to deny the points he made. He wasn’t going to help him, though. He had other duties to attend to, such as the meeting on the Watchtower he had to attend with Grayson as Batman and Robin.

“How are things going in Gotham?” Superman asked as Batman and Robin exited the Zeta Tubes.

Batman grunted as he always did, “Fine.”

Superman frowned, following Batman to the meeting room. “Are you sure? I saw the news. Are you okay?”

“Why would I not be?” Batman asked.

“Well, uh,” It was fun to watch Superman at a loss for words. “You must’ve gotten hurt pretty bad to not go out for almost two months,” he said, “And now Bruce Wayne is missing.”

The door to the meeting room opened, letting Superman, Batman, and Robin in. All conversation stopped. “Why would I be upset about Wayne going missing?”

Damian had to commend Grayson’s performance. He’d read in Father’s files that Superman could hear heartbeats, so tricking him was quite the accomplishment. He was upset, though, that the Kryptonian had yet to notice him. Actually, it seemed none of the heroes had noticed him.

“And Nightwing’s out of commission!” The Flash chimed in from his seat.

Batman turned his glare on the speedster. “Nightwing is doing some undercover work at the moment.”

“Oh.”

Superman took his seat beside Wonder Woman, leaving Batman and Robin with one chair left. Batman took it while Robin went to the dark corner to watch.

Wonder Woman stood. “Thank you all for coming,” she said as though this wasn’t a mandatory, bi-monthly meeting, “Currently, there is no situation that requires all of our focus. Washington D.C. is as it always is, as well as Gateway City.”

“And Themyscira?” Hawkgirl asked.

“They have not reached out about any problems they cannot handle on their own.” She retook her seat, prompting Superman to stand next.

And so the meeting went. Quick debriefs from everyone about their home cities, no more than five minutes each. Just as Batman designed it. When it came to the Dark Knights turn, however, he waited a full three seconds before standing. It was the only hint that something was off, but only Kal-El noticed, though he didn’t speak up about it.

“There have been no recent Arkham breakouts,” he reported, “Bruce Wayne has gone missing. The situation, however, is under control.” A bold faced lie, but no one could call him out on it. And those who could, wouldn’t dare. “Nightwing is doing undercover work and won’t be around for the foreseeable future. Red Robin is traveling for a mission of his own and won’t be around for the foreseeable future. Myself and Robin will be covering Gotham, though that does not invite any of you to operate in the city for any reason without explicit permission.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Aquaman said, “Who’s Red Robin?”

Batman blinked, the white lenses of his mask hiding it from everyone except Robin. “Red Robin.”

“Yeah,” the merman agreed, “Who is he?”

“He is Red Robin.” Batman stated.

Aquaman made to speak again, but Robin cut him off, looking at the screen on his wrist. “Batman,” he slunk from the shadows, pulling all attention to him and startling the heroes, “A message from Oracle. Conflict in Crime Alley.” Batman nodded with a grunt, sweeping out of the room. Robin followed.

“Hey, wait a second!” The Flash caught up to them quickly, stopping in front of them to cut them off. “Who is this!”

“Robin.”

“No,” The Flash shook his head, “Robin is a sickly Victorian child with a coffee addiction and a bo staff. This is not Robin.”

Robin clicked his tongue, “Tt. I am Robin.” He slowly pulled the katana at his hip from its sheath, just enough for the light to catch the blade. “Move.”

Batman held his arm out, not touching Robin, but catching his arm all the same. His head twitched to the right then the left. Robin resheathed his katana with another click of his tongue.

The Flash held up both of his hands and stepped back, “R-right. See you in two months?”

Neither vigilante responded, simply walking around him and back to the Zeta Tubes. Once the coords were set, they found themselves back in the Batcave. They still didn’t speak, opting to walk through the Cave and change into civvies in companionable silence. Finally, though, when they arrived in the Manor, Grayson spoke.

“You did well today,” his smile was gentle, “I was so nervous when I went to my first JL meeting! So were Jay and Tim. Steph never got to meet them, but I’m sure she would’ve been nervous, too.”

Dam

Damian left the room a step ahead of Grayson. “Being nervous about such a trivial meeting is unnecessary. The meeting itself was pointless. You withheld information from them, they all withheld information from each other. Why do they claim to be a team if you all do not trust each other as one? It seems a pointless waste of resources.

Grayson hummed. “I couldn’t tell you why everyone withholds information, but I can tell you that it’s not a waste of resources. Even if it was, Wayne Enterprises and Queen Consolidated fund basically everything.”

“Queen is Green Arrow, yes?” He turned into the dining room.

Grayson followed him still. “You figured it out that quickly?”

“Of course. The man is smart about his identity, but anyone who looks even a little closer than a glance at his company’s financial records would piece everything together.”

“Yeah,” Grayson chuckled, “But their tech girl is really good.”

“Better than Oracle?”

“Hey, now that’s not fair!”

“It is perfectly fair, Grayson. The children at school call it ‘home team solidarity’.” He took his pace at the table directly across from where Grayson was sitting, the head chair between them sitting empty. “So, Grayson, who is better? Felicity Smoak or Barbra Gordon?”

Pennyworth placed a plate in front of each of them, a cup following shortly after. The stack of letters in the middle of the table was three letters bigger.

Grayson huffed and stabbed his salad. “Not fair.”

Damian took the victory for what it was.

“Speaking of,” Grayson said a few moments later, “On the Watchtower, you said something about a message from Oracle? Something about Crime Alley?”

Damian swallowed his food before speaking. “Are you deaf? You were going to blow your cover, so I took the liberty of giving you a way out of the situation.”

“Aww!” Grayson cooed, “You do care!”

He huffed, moving to take another bite. “I care about not revealing our identities. Father is missing, Drake has gone off to who knows where looking for him, and you have taken the Cowl. The Justice League - a stupid name, by the way - would’ve figured out who we are if we had stayed any longer.

“‘A stupid name’ he says,” Grayson mumbled, “This coming from the kid raised by a group called the League of Assassins.” louder, he said, “You really have such little faith in my acting abilities?”

“‘League of assassins’ is the name outsiders have given it. ‘Shadows’ or ‘League of Shadow’ is the proper name.” He corrected. “And, yes. I don’t believe you could hold your cover under the scrutiny of the rest of the Justice League. You and Father have been around them enough times that they will know your tells if you do not hide them better. While you have them convinced for now, you must get better because they will know what to look for soon enough.” He took a sip of his water. “Besides, I don’t doubt that you can hide your identity as Nightwing acting as Batman from them. The line of questioning, should I have not gotten us out, would have risked our civilian identities. And, while I don’t care much for any of you, Father has taken painstaking measures to assure he is not discovered. Risking yourself risks all of us.”

Quiet permeated the room after his small speech was done. The two occupants finishing their food at a moderate pace.

The mansion was empty. In the year he’d been there, Damian had found that the Manor was always filled with noise and people. Now, however, it was just him, Grayson, and Pennyworth. Todd stayed in Crime Alley, not coming up for anything; Drake was somewhere in the world; Gordon was staying with her father for the time being; Brown had moved to Hong Kong with Cain, keeping little to no contact. Damian hated how empty it was. It reminded him of Nanda Parbat after Danyal had been pronounced dead. Barren, silent, dull.

Wayne Manor was, at its very core, a family home. Now, there was no family to fill its walls.

Reaching over, Damian picked up the letters that had been gathering for the last almost-two months. He was quick to sort through them. Father, Father, Father, Father- Damian? He set it aside. Father, Father, Damian again, Father, Damian. He set the rest down, not bothering to look through the rest of the pile. Why did he have mail? No one should be trying to-

Danyal.

How could he have forgotten? He must be so worried! Did he know what happened to Father? Was he waiting for a response? He needed to rectify this immediately.

Damian gathered his three letters and stood. “Excuse me.” He left the room, ignoring Grayson’s question of what was wrong. Quickly, he retreated to his room and sat at his desk, the envelopes glaring at him. Oddly, one of them didn’t have a return address on it, though the handwriting was the same on all of them.

He stared at the three for a little over an hour, struggling to open them. He wanted to, to see what his brother had said, but he couldn’t bring himself to add anything to his plate. Grayson and Pennyworth would not be able to handle the added stress of anything Danyal had put in his letters. He couldn’t handle whatever had been written down. Not yet, at least.

Would Danyal understand? He hoped so.

Damian tucked the three letters into the same drawer as the others, promising himself that he would read them later when he was more settled into his new role as Robin.

Three months later and Damian still hadn’t read the latters. They sat with the other, opened ones in the top left drawer of his desk, locked away from even himself. Every night, after patrol, he spent a good thirty minutes staring, trying to convince himself to open them, but he never did.

No follow-up letters came in, either, and that made him feel worse, somehow. Was Danyal upset with him? Was he in trouble? Was he waiting for a response? Damian didn’t know. He knew he’d have his answers if he opened the letters, but he couldn’t do it. So, they sat, tucked away, with an empty promise to read them later.

It’s not completely his fault that he hasn’t read them yet! Because it was just him and Grayson going out every night, he was working on several cases at once, while also keeping himself and Grayson alive. Pennyworth was doing what he could, but he is only one man. Brown and Cain only join them a few times a month, much more busy with their own things. Todd has stayed in Crime Alley, not even offering to branch out a few streets to help out. Gordon was still with her father, unable (or unwilling?) to act as Oracle for the time being. Not to mention that Drake was still MIA, looking for Father.

Between his duties as Robin, picking up the slack from the others, keeping himself and Grayson alive and as unharmed as they could be, and maintaining his civilian cover, could he really be blamed for not having the time to read his brother’s letters?

Yes.

There was still no news on Father. Drake was looking for him, chasing down leads that no one else had, but everyone else had given up. Grayson had taken to staying in Father’s room, crying when he thought no one was around because he wasn’t supposed to ever be Batman. Todd hadn’t bothered to contact anyone, but he hadn’t been too keen on the possibility of Father being alive from the very beginning. Pennyworth had seemed to come to the Acceptance stage and was moving on, doing as he always did. Cain, Brown, and Gordon weren’t around much, either, but it was clear they, too, had given up on Father’s life. The citizens of Gotham were much the same, offering sympathies and waiting for their declaration and a funeral date.

Damian was not prepared for any news other than his Father being around. He knew, in the back of his mind, that they were only holding off on the official announcement until Drake returned. If he didn’t return, then Damian supposed he would be the only one holding Grayson back from announcing Father’s death.

What a terrible burden to put on a child’s shoulders.

Damian found himself, once again, sitting in Father’s office. It was the one place no one ever went, not even to get to the Cave, so he was completely alone with Alfred the cat. The grandfather clock didn’t tick, but the hum of electricity from the elevator behind it was steady in the room, grounding Damian, keeping him from losing himself in his head.

The quiet was always a reprieve for him. In Nanda Parbat, there was always some noise, no matter how subtle or hidden. Footsteps only heard if you were listening for them, barely-there whispers of breath, wind against the walls and roof, murmurs of orders being relayed, the clink of weapons meeting, grunts from training, splashes from injuries, water flowing, snow melting, crops being tended to, animals. It all had a sound.

Silence, to everyone else, was foreboding; the tale tell signs of something not being right; the calm before a storm. To an assassin, silence was like coming home. Silence meant that they would be okay, that they’d live to see another day.

Damian relished in the silence of his Father’s office because it proved that he had been there. The room was empty, grieving for the man that had become lost, but it proved to Damian that his Father had been there. In some way, it brought him closer to his Father.

It was in the silence of his Father’s office that he spoke. Things he’d never been allowed to say with his Mother, things that he’d rather die than admit to anyone but himself.

“I don’t know what to do,” he whispered, his hand petting Alfred’s head, “I really don’t know what to do.”

And wasn’t that a terrifying thought? He’d been raised by Grandfather and Mother to always know exactly what was going on. If he didn’t know what was going on, he was to act like he did. Situations stayed in his control that way. Now, though, he couldn’t even pretend to know what was going on or what to do. Everyone was falling apart at the seams, overworked, stressed. No one had time for anything because they were all trying to fill the space Bruce left by pulling in every direction except in.

He felt like he was standing in the middle of a tornado. Father was gone, Pennyworth was trying to keep some form of normality, Grayson was trying to fill shoes that were never made for him to wear, Drake was trying to fix everything by looking for the epicenter of it all, and everyone else was falling away.

Everyone was pulling away from each other and blaming everyone else. He didn’t know what to do and it scared him.

In the year he’d been in the Manor before Father disappeared, they’d all been trying to teach Damian that it was okay for him to just be a kid sometimes. It went against everything he’d been raised on and taught, but he found it…fun. It was nice to not have to be looking over his shoulder all the time. He didn’t have to worry about traitors coming after him or when his next assignment would be, nor how long he’d be away from home.

He almost regretted listening to them now. Because now Father’s gone, Grayson is stretched so thin that he looks ready to keel over, Drake is gone, Todd is silent, the girls are so far away-!

Damian’s just a little kid. He doesn’t know how to deal with the situation.

So, he sits in his Father’s office with Alfred the cat and talks. Whether he talks to himself, his cat, or his Father, he doesn’t know. He just talks.

“I am not trained to handle this situation, Alfred,” he told the tuxedo cat on his lap, “I don’t think any of the others are, either.” He wanted to curl up, to pull his knees to his chest and bury his face in his arms. He wanted to cry. “I don’t know what to do.”

Danyal would know what to do.

But Danyal’s not here because Damian is a coward.

There are moments that Damian keeps close to his chest. Things that not even Mother knows. Moments when he and Danyal would sneak onto rooftops and speak of what scared them; moments when it was just him and his brother, telling stories they’d made up on their own; moments when they’d teach other what they were lacking at or in; moments curled up in the chicken coop or in the shed behind the greenhouses; moments where they could just be kids.

Damianand Danyal often found themselves alone together, shaking bodyguards or traitors - it was hard to tell who was who - off their tail and hiding in places only they could reach. They’d been praised by Grandfather for being so small, able to fit in the least likely of places, making missions take shorter amounts of time purely because they were small enough to go to their targets instead of waiting for them to come out.

One of their favorite places to be were the caves under Nanda Parbat. Not the Lazarus Pit caves! They’d never go near those. These caves were hidden from the others, too hard for adults to get to.

“We’re going to be too big to fit in here soon, ahki,” Danyal whispered, his voice carrying in the open space.

Damian clicked his tongue. “Then we will need to find somewhere else to make our own, akhi.”

Danyal frowned, “And leave Goliath all alone? No way!”

A sigh. “Unfortunately, Goliath will have to stay here in the caves. He was born here; he will be fine.”

A pout. “We could take him with us!”

“Where would we keep him?”

“In our rooms?”

“He’s down here because he got too big for us to keep in our rooms. He’s only going to get bigger.”

“Well, I’m not leaving him here.”

“Well, he can’t come with us.”

“We could keep him higher up the peak!”

“And keep him from his natural habitat? I think not.”

“How do you know that this is his natural habitat?”

“Because-” He cut himself off, Danyal doing the same.

Just in the distance, close enough to make out words, they heard voices. Some of the Shadows had followed them down and were looking for them. Quickly, they hid in the darkest corners of the cavern, the fire doused and Goliath preparing to attack.

The four Shadows came and passed, their carried conversation hinting that they were traitors in the ranks. After ten more minutes of nothing but silence, Damian and Danyal slunk from their hiding spots.

Danyal patted Goliath’s snout. “Sorry, bud, but we’ve gotta go.”

Damian nodded, also petting the dragon bat’s nose. “We will return when we can. In the meantime, Grandfather will want to know what we’ve learned.”

“When will he return?”

“Grandfather and Mother should both be here within the month. We will tell them then.”

Little moments that no one would think twice about until they’re all they have left. Memories of someone just out of their reach. Damian had a lot of those moments of Danyal and himself, all held very closely. He didn’t have nearly as many with Father, only as many as the fingers on his hand. Grayson tried his best to make up for the time Father was missing, but it wasn’t the same. He didn’t know what it felt like to have a father, but spending time with Grayson felt close to what he knew it should be.

“Any news from Drake?” Damian asked as he sat in front of Grayson at the table. He snuck a look at the shrunken pile of letters, but didn’t see another one with his name on it. He didn’t know what he expected. It had been six months.

Grayson shook his head, his long hair greasy and in his face. He was mostly focused on the paperwork in front of him. Some of it from his day job, but most of it was from case files he was working on as Batman. “Nope, still radio silence from Tim, Jason, Steph, and Cass.”

“What of Gordon?”

He sighed. “She’s not talking to me much, but I get it. Life happens. She told me she’ll get back to helping us out as soon as she can, but I don’t think that’ll be for a while.”

“I see,” Damian fell silent. “What of the WAR case?”

Grayson sighed heavier, his hands running through his hair again. “I still can’t get a hold of their leader. The guy’s slippery, and anyone working with him is just as!”

Damian hummed. “Perhaps you should let me focus on that case.”

“What? No, I can’t-”

“You’re stretching yourself too thin, Grayson, you will end up killing yourself if you do not take a step back.”

Grayson looked up for the first time since Damian had joined him with a concerned frown on his face. “Where’s this coming from, Dames?”

Damian didn’t react to the nickname. “If you die, then I will be alone.” he stated. Then, he stood, took the WAR case file from Grayson, and left the room. “Get some sleep.”

He found himself in his room, the case file in his hands, but all his attention on the locked top drawer. Danyal would know what to do. Danyal, despite being younger, always excelled with social lessons. He was always the fastest thinker, coming up with solutions to problems before they could become problems.

He opened the drawer, the key hanging around his neck at all times. Inside was every letter his brother had sent him. On the very top were the three he hadn’t brought himself to read open. If he read them now, would Danyal even want to hear from him? It’s been six months.

Damian closed the drawer, locking it, and hiding the key under his shirt again. He was quick to leave his room, taking the WAR case file with him to his Father’s office. He could focus there where the unopened letters weren’t looming over him.

Damian is a coward.

Translation 1 - Arabic: I hope everything is okay

Part 4 Part 6 Artwork

#Tales of Conquest. Warnings of Fools #Letters Between Brothers #part 5 #word count: 4.9k #my writing #ao3 #ao3 writer #fanfic #dc x dp #ghouls and gang writing event 2024 #dpxdcbang2024 #g&g24

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nolita-fairytale · 2 years ago

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burn your life down | chef luca x fem!reader | chapter nine

summary: you catch up with an old friend and luca makes you dinner.

warnings: fluff, eventual angst not use of y/n, conversations about divorce, slow burn, baby, second person pov, swearing, danish inaccuracies, very little connection to the storyline of the bear.

word count: 3.3k

listen to: the official 'burn your life down' playlist (songs mentioned in chapter are in this playlist!)

a/n: i've always pictured mathilde & jesper as the chalamet siblings AND astrid is in fact played by rina sawayama i don't make the rules (i do). thank you for all comments, reblogs, and screaming at me because we are all obsessed. seriously, it's an honor and i'm just so excited that you all are just as excited as me. let me know if you'd like to be added or removed from the taglist.

chapter eight | masterlist | chapter ten

You spend your first Sunday afternoon without Luca, for the first time in a few weeks, deep cleaning your home. Between your new relationship and your work at the restaurant, you’d found yourself falling behind on chores. But he’d worked the late shift last night, filling in for a cook who called out, which is how you’d ended up with a night and morning of divine alone time.

With your headphones on, it’s easy to multitask, simultaneously folding clothes while you catch up with your friend, formerly-sister-in-law, over the phone.

“Anyways, work’s kept me so damn busy that I’ve barely had a moment in my own home but… we are all doing quite alright over here,” she explains, after detailing her travels all across Europe.

Being a buyer for Nordstrom UK keeps her on the road, or rather, in the sky, at a frequent rate.

“Well I’m glad you called. It’s good to hear from you. And It’s really good to catch up, Astrid,” you say, smiling to yourself as you finish folding a pile of t-shirts.

“Well, just because you and Joe didn’t work out doesn’t change anything. You’re still my sister,” she replies, with a small laugh. “We’re family, regardless of the fact that he couldn’t keep a good thing around.”

“Astrid! You know it wasn’t like that,” you protest, though you know it’s all in jest.

“I know,” she sighs, and you can practically hear her rolling her eyes from all the way to England. “Selfishly, I’m just feeling a bit contrary about it, is all. But enough about me. How are you? How’s everything at the restaurant?”

“It’s been great. I… can’t believe that I have a restaurant,” you answer as you shake your head in disbelief.

“God, I’ve gotta get out there soon. I haven’t stopped thinking about that lumache from my last visit – what was it – last November? Yeah, it’s been too long,” Astrid recalls lightheartedly.

“Yeah, it really has. Just let me know. You know I’m always up for hosting you,” you agree, hopeful that she’ll come visit soon.

“Besides work, what else’s new? And don’t tell me you’re still just burying yourself in the restaurant because I don’t want to hear it,” she asks, a curious tone in her voice as she segways from work to

“Well um…” you trail off, treading lightly over the delicate subject.

The thing you want to tell her about is Luca, because he is what’s new in your life. His presence in your life is evident – it’s in the pair of sweatpants he tossed in with your laundry that you’re folding now, the spare toothbrush you ‘lent’ him that sits right next to yours, and the way that thinking of him makes your heart race.

You don’t want to lie to her… but you’re also not sure what the etiquette is either.

It’s not like this is included in the divorcee handbook you never got in the first place.

“I’m… sort of seeing someone,” you admit, hesitantly.

“What?!” she gasps, instantly giddy with excitement. “Yeah, we uh…” you hesitate, testing the waters since she seems excited about it. “We’ve been dating for about a month now, maybe.”

“Shut up! That’s mega! How’d you meet? Tell me everything,” she gushes.

“Well, he actually came into the restaurant. Kind of became a regular and uh…” you explain, and she can hear the smile in your voice as you do. “He’s great. You’ll love this story, actually. He’s also a chef – a pastry chef. One night after coming in, he left a box of croissants for my staff and a handwritten note inviting me to come to the restaurant he works at. It was very….”

“Romantic. Wow…” Astrid adds, too excited for you as she listens. “And a bold move. Knows what he wants. I like him already.”

“Yeah, he’s… he’s really incredible. I swear. He has the patience of a saint, especially as I’ve uh… you know, I’ve been trying to figure this whole… dating after you end your marriage kinda thing,” you continue, chuckling in response to the awkwardness of it all.

“We were friends actually, for a while. Just friends, which, I know you’ll yell at me about when you see what he looks like. But I think it was good for us, for me, really – to be friends first.”

“Well, now you have to send me a picture,” she requests, even more intrigued as you fiddle with your phone, pulling up a photo you took of Luca the other day.

You wait a beat. Then another, seeing that the photo has been delivered as Astrid shrieks in your ear.

“Are you fuckin’ kidding me, mate?!” she practically screams.

“I know,” you squeal.

“You are absolutely unbelievable,” she shakes her head, staring at the gorgeous blonde on her screen. “How did you not jump right into bed?!”

“Trust me,” you reply, the room suddenly feeling 5 degrees hotter. “After we agreed to start seeing each other, we didn’t wait very long.”

”Sounds like you have a boyfriend,” Astrid comments smugly, as she waits for your reaction. You have expect yourself to panic, but you don’t as you the words tumble out of your mouth.

“I… it does sound that way, doesn’t it?” you ask her, your voice soft as you reply.

“Absolutely, my darling,” Astrid replies, before changing the subject. “Okay, so how’s the sex?!”

“Astrid!” you protest with a laugh. “Do you really want to-?”

“Of fucking bloody course I do! Now spill!” she demands.

You pause, grinning as your cheeks blush.

“It’s fucking incredible,” you admit, eliciting a giggle from your friend.

“Shit, babe,” she sighs, contently. “I’m happy for you.”

“Thanks,” you say back, because you’re pretty damn happy too. “Astrid, will you keep this between us? It’s just that it’s all still so new and….”

You pause.

“I just don’t want Joe to hear it from anyone but me.”

“Of course,” she replies, compassionately, in deep understanding.

“What else are sisters for?”

-------------------------------

You showed up to Luca’s flat uncertain of what to expect, but then he’d pulled you into his home and kissed you like you’d been on his mind all day – and in his defense, you really had.

“Why don’t you come over Sunday night, then? Let me cook you dinner for a change,” he had suggested as you were figuring out your schedules for the week.

“You sure you’ll be up for that after working overtime this week?” you’d asked in response.

“I’ll be alright, love,” he’d answered, like he had unlimited energy when it came to you.

And even though you’d asked him if you should bring dessert – only to be met with a cheeky comment about you being dessert – you showed up anyway with a matcha basque cheesecake in hand and a deli container filled with a yuzu scented whipped cream to top it with.

So this is how you find yourself perched on top of Luca’s kitchen island countertop, after having watched his exceptional knife skills for the last thirty. You spend your evening snacking on sliced sourdough bread you’re not sure how he had the time to make, and sip on your glass of red wine while watching him prepare a coq au vin. You swear you’ve got hearts in your eyes when you look at him, watching his muscular, inked forearms flex with how he grips his chef’s knife. As music plays softly in the background, a playlist you can only imagine is the entirety of Luca’s music library put on shuffle, you busy yourself, refilling your wine glass for your second glass of the night.

“Want another, babe?” you ask him, noticing that he’s on his way to empty as well.

“Sure. Thank you, my love,” he replies, scooping a handful of chopped carrots up from his cutting board with a bench scraper, depositing them into a small bowl. You watch as Luca picks up his glass of wine and makes his way over to you.

He hands you the glass, then places a gentle kiss against your lips, a smile spreading across his lips. Luca takes a few steps away so that you can fill his glass again, making a few swift movements to turn the heat down on the gas burner.

“How was your day?” he asks, while still moving around his kitchen.

You fill him in on your productive day of chores and catching up with an old friend while Luca listens, busy with removing the pieces of chicken out from the heavy, enameled, cast-iron pot and onto a plate. By the time Luca’s added hot oil to the pot, followed by the chopped carrots and peeled, halved cipollini onions, you’ve caught him up on the long version of Jesper’s latest love-life updates, since he and Claudio have now decided to make it official.

“So you used to make this with your mom?” you ask curiously, changing the subject as you watch Luca scrape the browned bits off the bottom of the pot.

He nods in response, stealing a glance your way, his lips turned up into a half smile.

“Yeah. Most coq au vins can take up to three to four hours, but my mum didn’t have the time,” Luca explains, as you watch him remove the pieces of chicken from out of the heavy, enameled, cast-iron pot and onto a plate. “But it was important for her… to cook for me… to share that ritual with me when she could.”

The sound of the wine and cognac mixture hitting the hot pan sizzles throughout Luca’s home, your nose filling with the smell of deglazed caramelized bits.

“And I spent a lot of time as a kid watching the cooking channel, so while we didn’t exactly spend all Sunday cooking a classic French coq au vin, Jamie Oliver’s did the job quite well,” Luca recalls, sharing a piece of his relationship with food with you.

“Well, it smells incredible,” you say, as he approaches you once more, this time with a full glass of wine in your hands, ready for him.

As Luca leans in again, the way he kisses you is much more languid, slow, like time is limitless. You breathe him in, completely enamored with the man that’s kissing you, and before anything too wild can happen, he pulls away, leaving you wanting more. Luca smirks, and you swear he knows the effect he has on you. He presses a quick peck to your lips this time, before taking the glass of wine from your hands and heading back to his post in front of the stovetop.

“This all goes back in,” he continues, using tongs to add the chicken and pancetta bits back into the simmering pot. “Then we braise it in the oven for about… thirty, forty minutes maybe.”

You raise your glass of wine to your lips, taking a quick sip of the beaujolais you’re using both for the coq au vin and to unwind, listening as the song changes in the background, instantly recognizing the drum pattern. The corners of your lips turn up into a smile as you close your eyes, enjoying the familiarity of the song as you say:

“God, I love this song.”

Luca smiles, “It’s a classic. Great song.”

Show me, show me, show me how you do that trick

The one that makes me scream, she said

The one that makes me laugh, she said

Threw her arms around my neck

“You know, I saw them when I was in my early 20s. It was just me and a bunch of somebody’s dads,” you grin, in reference to The Cure.

Luca chuckles at your comment, before asking, “Did you really?”

“Yes. And when they came out on stage, smoke machine and all, I wept because it was the fulfillment of a childhood dream – to see them. I… was a bit of an angsty teen,” you answer, raising your wine glass to your lips once more.

“Think we all had an angsty phase, more or less. Mine was less pining to The Cure and more stirrin’ up trouble,” Luca admits, lightheartedly.

“Again, and I’m holding you to it. You promised me pictures,” you remind him with aplomb.

“I did, yeah,” he chuckles, shyly, with a sigh of resignation.

You focus on enjoying one of your favorite songs and sipping on your glass of wine, as you watch Luca put the enameled cast-iron plot, full of the ready-to-braise coq au vin, into the oven.

Comfortable silences between you and Luca have become more frequent. There are days that all you want to do is stay up till the early hours of the morning talking and kissing and fucking, and there are others that you love leaning into the quiet intimacy that seems to be developing between you. It’s almost as if you’ve forgotten what this feels like – the excitement of something new where you’re learning so much about each other and everything feels like the first time.

It’s thrilling and it’s also safe.

Luca makes you feel safe, and you can’t imagine doing this with anyone else but him.

For a first time relationship, post-divorce, you really hit the jackpot, you think to yourself.

Luca continues moving around the kitchen, drinking his wine in between clean up tasks, as if he’s at work, hell bent on keeping his station clean. He’s much better than you are at that, you observe, as he does a few dishes that he’s used up, instead of leaving them in the sink for tomorrow.

As he dries his hands on a dish towel, the song changes, and the opening notes of Beyonce’s Love On Top begin playing. You smile as you hear the undeniable:

Bring the beat in!

“Alright, mate. Hear me out,” Luca proposes, spinning around with excitement. “And I don’t say this lightly. But this. This is one of the greatest songs of all time.”

“I-I’m sorry,” you giggle as you watch Luca dance to the song in his kitchen with a smoothness that’s somehow simultaneously a little silly.

“What? You don’t agree?” he asks, shooting you a look as he ball changes towards you, earning another laugh from you.

“No, I do. I love this song,” you grin from ear to ear. “I’m just so tickled by the fact that you love this song.”

“It’s Beyonce,” he defends, in his best ‘well-duh’ kind of tone, gesturing wildly. “C’mon. Let’s dance.”

“Wh-,” you begin to say, before Luca’s practically pulling you off of the counter to join him. “Luca!!”

But he’s not having any of your protests as he wraps his arms around you. You hang onto him, holding him close as he leads you in a silly uptempo kind of dance, spinning and turning you with him in a way that has you in a fit of giggles. The two of you stumble from his kitchen into the living space area as you move together, embracing how goofy and ridiculous you both feel.

Luca sings along softly, something you get a better listen to as soon as he’s pulling you close to him.

“What the fuck!” you practically shriek, your jaw practically on the floor.

“Hmm?” he hums in response, unphased by your outburst.

“You’re unfuckingreal,” you balk, as you listen to him hum along to the Beyonce song. “I mean. You-, like, you look like this, you’re great in bed, and you have a nice singing voice? How-, how’s a girl ever supposed to stand a chance?”

He chuckles, his lips ghosting over the shell of your ear, sending chills down your spine as he coos, teasingly, “I’m great in the sack, hmm?”

Your heart skips a beat as you pull back, just enough to look into the eyes of your lover as you say, “Oh fuck off.”

He laughs again, this time, leaving a soft kiss against your ear, hugging you closer to him as you slow your dance down as the song begins to end. There’s a pause between this and the next song, providing the perfect opportunity for Luca to answer your earlier question.

“You weren’t,” Luca replies, his voice quiet but sure. Supposed to stand a chance, he means. “I think we were supposed to meet. Supposed to be here.”

Supposed to fall in love.

He leans down to kiss you as the next song begins, transitioning into a much bluesier sound. The crooning sounds of Etta James blast from Luca’s living room speakers, as you smile into the kiss. You groan, your heart aching in the best way as kiss him to:

I want a Sunday kind of love

A love to last past Saturday night

And I'd like to know it's more than love at first sight

And I want a Sunday kind of love, oh yeah, yeah

“My God. I think tonight’s shuffle is proof that you may just have the most versatile taste in music history,” you mumble, pulling away for a moment from the kiss.

As you open your eyes, Luca’s just admiring you, an awestruck look on his face that steals your breath. No longer able to deflect with humor or anything else really, you lay your head on his chest, settling into the soft swaying motion of the dance that you and Luca have fallen into. Your arms go around his neck once more as Luca holds you close to him, making a mental note to remember this forever.

“How did you know?” you ask Luca, softly.

“What’s that, love?” he asks back.

“You said that you thought we might be good at this. At… at an ‘us.’ When we talked about starting to see each other,” you begin, choosing your words carefully, underscored by the violins of the song.

Luca takes a deep breath admitting that, “I didn’t.”

“What do you mean?” you ask, looking up at him, your eyes full of adoration for the man that’s captured your heart.

“Babe, I-,” he starts, letting out a small laugh. “I knew we got on well. And that I liked you. And I thought… if we got on this well as friends and you felt the same, that we could give it a go. See what happens.” He takes a beat, choosing his words, before continuing with:

“But, my love, I can’t predict the future. It could work out in the long run, it could not. But I wanted-, I want to see how far we can take it.”

You take a deep breath, because this conversation is deep-breath worthy.

Notorious for wanting to read the last page of a book first, you know he’s right, that you can’t predict the future, and you, now just as much as he does, would like to see how far this could go.

“Yeah it-, that makes complete sense,” you stammer, feeling incredibly vulnerable all of a sudden. You rest your head against his chest again, settling back into your slow sway to the beat.

Like clockwork, the song ends, something a little more upbeat trickling in through the speakers. You and Luca remain in each others’ arms, content to stay here forever. You’re amazed at his confidence, at his fearlessness to take a chance on love, and you think to yourself, he might be teaching you some of that too.

“Let’s take a trip together,” Luca suggests, the low resonance of his voice cutting through the quiet. “Maybe end of the month or something. An end of summer trip.” He chuckles, a hand coming up to stroke your hair as you enjoy the way his voice vibrates in his chest.

“Fuck it. I could care less if we make it in time for the end of summer. Let’s just get out of the city together.”

“That sounds spectacular,” you answer.

And it’s there, in Luca’s arms after a dance party for two, that you think to yourself, you couldn’t be happier.

#chef luca #will poulter #luca the bear #the bear season 2 #the bear headcanon #luca x reader #the bear hulu #the bear fx #the bear fanfiction #chef luca x reader #pastry chef luca #burn your life down

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