#the first san francisco adventure

[oldtvlover]

Good evening fellas,

and now the pics to the Gifs. lol

Our paramedics are still fun to watch and even the trouble they get into, especially Johnny. *grins*

Enjoy!

Note: Next update - next weekend with the last movie here. *sighs*

[gatheringbones]

[“Coming out was very lonely. I had very few friends. Most of the adult lesbians I knew were alcoholics, chronically unemployed, prone to violence, self-hating, apolitical, closeted, cliquish. Lesbians hated each other. If you found a lover you stopped going to the bar because you could not trust other lesbians; they would try to break up your relationship. My first woman lover went into the military, where she turned in other lesbians so she would not be exposed. One of my dyke friends got a job as a supervisor in a cabinet-making company and refused to hire lesbians because, she said, they were unreliable employees who were disliked by the other workers. The only thing that seemed worse to me than the apolitical lesbian community I came out in was the strangulation of pretending to be straight. I came out only because I could not go back; there was no place for me to stand in the het world. I was driven out.

Moving to San Francisco improved things somewhat. There was more public lesbian space there—six bars instead of one. But it did not alleviate the loathing with which my family viewed me. Nor was San Francisco in the early seventies any sort of gay utopia. We had no gay-rights law, queer bashing was a frequent event, and everyone had lost at least one job or been denied a place to live. It was a relief to be surrounded by other lesbian feminists, but only to a point. Bar dykes and feminists still had contempt for one another. Feminism rapidly became a way to reconstitute sexual prudery, to the point that it seemed to me that bar dykes were actually more accepting of and knowledgeable about the range of behavior that constituted lesbianism. In the bars or in the women’s movement, separatism was pretty much mandatory, if you didn’t want to get your ass kicked or be shunned. Separatism deteriorated into a rationalization for witch hunts in the lesbian community rather than a way for women to bond with one another and become more powerful activists. The lesbian community of that decade did terrible things to bi women, transgender people, butch/femme lesbians, bar dykes, dykes who were not antiporn, bisexual and lesbian sex workers, fag hags, and dykes who were perceived as being perverts rather than über-feminists. We were so guilty about being queer that only a rigid adherence to a puritanical party line could redeem us from the hateful stereotypes of mental illness and sexual debauchery.

What did I gain? I came a little closer to making my insides match my outsides, and that was no small blessing. The first time I met other dykes I recognized a part of myself in them, and knew I would have to let it out so I could see who I was. For a time, being a lesbian quieted my gender dysphoria because it made it possible for me to be a different kind of woman. That was an enormous relief.

For a long time, I hoped that by being strong, sexually adventurous, and sharpening my feminist consciousness, I could achieve a better fit between my body and the rest of me. Lesbianism was a platform from which I could develop a different sort of feminism, one that included a demand for sexual freedom and had room for women of all different erotic proclivities. I had a little good sex and discovered that I was not a cold person, I could love other people. It was as a lesbian that I began to find my voice as a writer, because in the early days of the women’s movement, we valued every woman’s experience. There was a powerful ethic around making it possible for every woman to speak out, to testify, to have her say. But there were always these other big pieces of my internal reality that lesbianism left no room for.

The first big piece of cognitive dissonance I had to deal with, in my second coming out, was S/M. I date my coming out as a leather dyke from two different decisions. One was a decision to write down one of my sexual fantasies, the short story that eventually became “Jessie.” At the time I wrote the rough draft of that story, I had never tied anybody up or done anything else kinky. I was terribly blocked as a writer. I kept beginning stories and poems that I would destroy. I have no idea if they were any good or not. My self-loathing was so intense, my inner critic so strong, that I could not evaluate my own work.

So I decided to write this one piece, under the condition that I never had to publish it or show it to another person. I just wanted to tell the truth about one thing. And I was badly in need of connecting with my own sexuality since I was in the middle of what would be a five-year relationship with a woman who insisted we be monogamous, but refused to have sex with me. So I wrote about dominance and submission, the things I fantasized about when I masturbated that upset me so much I became nauseated. Lightning did not strike. As I read and reread my own words, I thought some of them were beautiful. I dared show this story to a few other people. Some of them hated it. Some of them were titillated. Nobody had ever seen anything like it before. The story began to circulate in Xerox form, lesbian samizdat. I found the strength to defend my story when I was told it was unspeakable or wildly improbable.

In October of 1976, I attended a lesbian health conference in Los Angeles and went to a workshop there about S/M. In order to go to a workshop, you had to sign a registration sheet. I was harassed by dykes who were monitoring this space to see who dared sign up for that filthy workshop. On my way, I had to walk through a gauntlet of women who were booing and hissing, calling names, demanding that the workshop be canceled, threatening to storm the room and kick us all out of the conference. The body language and self-calming techniques I had learned when I had to deal with antigay harassment on the street came in very handy, but how odd it was to be using those defenses against the antagonism of other dykes. Their hatred felt like my mother’s hatred. I am so glad I did not let it stop me.

When I got home from that workshop, I knew that I was not the only one. Not only were there other lesbians who fantasized about sadomasochism, there were women who had done these things with each other. I decided to come out again. If there were other leather dykes in San Francisco, they had to be able to find me, so I had to make myself visible. This meant that I often did not get service at lesbian bars, or I was asked to leave women-only clubs and restaurants. I was called names, threatened, spit at. I got hate mail and crank calls. But I also found my tribe. And because I had already experienced my first coming out, I knew we were not going to be an ideal, happy family. I could be more patient with our dysfunctions, and see them as the result of being scared, marginalized, kicked around. Being a leather dyke took me another step closer to dealing with my gender issues. I could experiment with extreme femme and extreme butch drag; take on a male persona during sex play. I gave up separatism because I needed to take support from any place where it was available. Gay men already had a thriving leather culture, and I wanted to learn from them. I also wanted to have sex with them. It still wasn’t okay as far as lesbian feminism was concerned to be bisexual, to be transgendered, but I could bring those folks into my life and make alliances with them. I could defend them in print. There was even more good sex, and people who loved me and received my love despite the fact that it was dangerous for us to show ourselves to one another. I faced my sexual shadow, and she bowed to me and then danced beautifully in profile against the white walls of my consciousness. My writer’s voice was unlocked.”]

pat califa, from layers of the onion, spokes of the wheel, from a woman like that: lesbian and bisexual writers tell their coming out stories, 2000

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Announcing the Picks and Shovels book tour

This week only, Barnes and Noble is offering 25% off pre-orders of my forthcoming novel Picks and Shovels.

My next novel, Picks and Shovels, is officially out in the US and Canada on Feb 17, and I'm about to leave on a 20+ city book-tour, which means there's a nonzero chance I'll be in a city near you between now and the end of the spring!

https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250865908/picksandshovels

Picks and Shovels is a standalone novel starring Martin Hench – my hard-charging, two-fisted, high-tech forensic accountant – in his very first adventure, in the early 1980s. It's a story about the Weird PC era, when no one was really certain what shape PCs should be, who should make them, who should buy them, and what they're for. It features a commercial war between two very different PC companies.

The first one, Fidelity Computing, is a predatory multi-level marketing faith scam, run by a Mormon bishop, a Catholic priest, and an orthodox rabbi. Fidelity recruits people to exploit members of their faith communities by selling them third-rate PCs that are designed as rip-off lock-ins, forcing you to buy special floppies for their drives, special paper for their printers, and to use software that is incompatible with everything else in the world.

The second PC company is Computing Freedom, a rebel alliance of three former Fidelity Computing sales-managers: an orthodox woman who's been rejected by her family after coming out as queer; a Mormon woman who's rejected the Church over its opposition to the Equal Rights Amendment, and a nun who's quit her order to join the Liberation Theology movement in the struggle for human rights in America's dirty wars.

In the middle of it all is Martin Hench, coming of age in San Francisco during the PC bubble, going to Dead Kennedys shows, getting radicalized by ACT UP!, and falling in love – all while serving as CFO and consigliere to Computing Freedom, as a trade war turns into a shooting war, and they have to flee for their lives.

The book's had fantastic early reviews, with endorsements from computer historians like Steven Levy (Hackers), Claire Evans (Broad-Band), John Markoff (What the Doormouse Said) and Dan'l Lewin (CEO of the Computer History Museum). Stephen Fry raved that he "hugely enjoyed" the "note perfect," "superb" story.

And I'm about to leave on tour! I have nineteen confirmed dates, and two nearly confirmed dates, and there's more to come! I hope you'll consider joining me at one of these events. I've got a bunch of fantastic conversation partners joining me onstage and online, and the bookstores that are hosting me are some of my favorite indie booksellers in the world.

BOSTON (Feb 14): Boskone, 4PM, Westin Boston Seaport District

BOSTON (Feb 14): Brookline Booksmith with KEN LIU, 7PM, 279 Harvard Street, Brookline

VIRTUAL (Feb 15): YANIS VAROUFAKIS, sponsored by Jacobin and hosted by David Moscrop, 10AM Pacific, 1PM Eastern, 6PM UK, 7PM CET

MENLO PARK (Feb 17): Kepler’s Books with CHARLIE JANE ANDERS, 7PM, 1010 El Camino Real

LOS ANGELES (Feb 18): Diesel Bookstore with WIL WHEATON, 630PM, 225 26th Street, Santa Monica

SEATTLE (Feb 19): Third Place Books with DAN SAVAGE, 7PM, 17171 Bothell Way NW Lake Forest Park

TORONTO (Feb 23): Another Story, 630PM, 315 Roncesvalles Ave

NYC (Feb 26): The Strand with JOHN HODGMAN, 7PM, 828 Broadway

PENN STATE (Feb 27): Kern Auditorium, 7PM, 112 Kern Building

DOYLESTOWN (Mar 1): Doylestown Bookshop, 12PM, 16 S Main St

BALTIMORE (Mar 2): Red Emma’s, 2PM, 630PM, 3128 Greenmount Ave

DC (Mar 4): Cleveland Park Library with MATT STOLLER, 630PM, 3310 Connecticut Ave NW

RICHMOND (Mar 5): Fountain Bookstore with LEE VINSEL, 6PM, 1312 E Cary St

AUSTIN (Mar 10): First Light Books, 7PM, 4300 Speedway/43rd

BURBANK (Mar 13): Dark Delicacies, 6PM, 822 N. Hollywood Way

SAN DIEGO (Mar 24): Mysterious Galaxy, 7PM, 3555 Rosecrans

BELFAST (Mar 24) (remote): Imagine! Festival with ALAN MEBAN, 7PM UK

CHICAGO, Apr 2: Exile in Bookville with PETER SAGAL, 7PM, 410 S Michigan Ave, 2nd floor

BLOOMINGTON, Apr 4: Morgenstern Books, 6PM, 642 N Madison St

PDX, Jun 20 (TBC): Powell’s Books (date and time to be confirmed)

I'm also finalizing plans for one or two dates in NEW ZEALAND at the end of April, as well as a ATLANTA date, likely on March 26.

I really hope you'll come out and say hello. I know these are tough times. Hanging out with nice people who care about the same stuff as you is a genuine tonic.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2025/02/06/picks-and-shovels-tour/#19-cities-plus-plus

[theoutcastrogue]

Cartoon depictions of the homeless increasingly reflect the hostility of today’s political leaders toward people on the streets. We’ve gone from images of charming hobos with bindles to zombies taking over cities. If you consume any news at all, you’ve probably noticed that the United States is pathologically cruel to its homeless citizens. This May, the brutal killing of Jordan Neely—who was strangled to death, at the age of 30, simply because he was unhoused and shouting on the Manhattan subway—captured the national spotlight, but it was just one of many such cases of unprovoked violence. In January, two cops reportedly kidnapped a homeless man in Hialeah, Florida, drove him to an “isolated and dark location,” and beat him unconscious. That same month, art dealer Shannon Collier Gwin faced battery charges after he sprayed a homeless woman with a hose outside his San Francisco gallery, barking “Move! Move!” at her. (Predictably, Gwin got a lenient plea deal of just 35 hours of community service.) Elsewhere in the city, homeless San Franciscans have been attacked with chemical bear spray on at least eight occasions. Other assaults have been more impersonal but no less vicious. On July 14, the city of Houston abruptly closed its only public cooling center in the downtown area, potentially condemning anyone without shelter to suffer heatstroke in 90-degree weather. Among the property-owning class, the phenomenon of hostile architecture—sidewalks with spikes that stab anyone who tries to sleep, benches with iron bars, and the like—has become de rigueur. The widespread callousness and lack of compassion are both infuriating and hard to comprehend. How on Earth, we might ask, did things get this bad? [...]

Looking back at older cartoons, one of the things that stands out immediately is the absence of negative attitudes toward the homeless. In fact, during the Golden Age of animation, creators seemed to have had a real affinity for the poor and unhoused, often placing their most iconic characters in that role. There’s a wonderful 1948 Warner Bros. short called “Riff Raffy Daffy,” in which Daffy Duck is looking for a place to sleep—first on a park bench, then a trash can, and finally a furniture display in a shop window—and has to dodge the harassment of the police, as represented by Porky Pig in a little blue uniform. (Literally, the cop is a pig!) Or, in the 1950 cartoon “Homeless Hare,” Bugs Bunny’s rabbit hole is destroyed by a new construction project, leading him to unleash his usual slapstick mayhem against the developers until they put it back. In these cartoons, homelessness is something inflicted on people by outside forces—gentrification and the real estate business, in Bugs’ case—and something which can be successfully resisted. Even Disney cast a homeless dog as a romantic lead in 1955’s Lady and the Tramp, contrasting Lady’s sheltered naivety with Tramp’s superior knowledge of the world. The title invokes the memory of Charlie Chaplin’s “Tramp” films, which similarly brought dignity and humanity to the role of a homeless man. (Bugs Bunny, too, takes inspiration from Chaplin, and multiple Warner animators have drawn him as the Tramp.) In 1961, Hanna-Barbera’s profoundly underrated Top Cat followed the adventures of a gang of wisecracking Manhattan alley cats, who, like Daffy, are always outwitting a meddling policeman. At worst, classic cartoons may trivialize the suffering and danger associated with homelessness—there’s a certain recurring image of the carefree hobo carrying a bindle, which paints the whole subject in a romanticized light—but the homeless themselves are rarely disparaged or made the butt of the joke. Quite the opposite. 

It took a few years, but cartoons caught up to the Reaganite turn. In episodes from the ’90s and early 2000s, there’s a palpable shift in the way homeless characters appear compared to earlier decades. The perspective is different: we’re now seeing them through the eyes of comfortably housed characters, rather than their own. Often they don’t even get proper names. [...] This trajectory leads us, perhaps inevitably, to SpongeBob SquarePants. [..] Squidward gets accused of stealing a dime by his comically greedy boss, Mr. Krabs, and quits his job in a fit of outrage. We then flash forward to see Squidward, now bedraggled and unshaven, living in a cardboard box on the street and begging for change. [...] Mercifully, the ever-cheerful SpongeBob gives Squidward a place to stay—but the moment he’s safely off the street, Squidward turns from a sympathetic victim of circumstance into a lazy, entitled freeloader, straight out of a Reagan speech. He makes no effort to find work and loafs around SpongeBob’s house for ages. [...] Eventually, an exasperated SpongeBob writes “GET A JOB” in his alphabet soup, before shoving him (bed and all) back to work at the Krusty Krab. [...] Worst of all, though, the episode suggests that homelessness can be solved on an individual basis if the people in question simply stop being lazy and “GET A JOB.” This is the biggest myth of all. In 2021, a statistical analysis by the University of Chicago found that 53 percent of people in homeless shelters, and 40.4 percent of unsheltered people, do have jobs. The problem is that their wages are too low, and rents are too high. According to statistics from the same year, it’s impossible for someone working a full-time, minimum-wage job to afford a single-bedroom apartment in 93 percent of U.S. counties, and there are no states in which someone can rent a two-bedroom space on the current federal minimum wage of $7.25 per hour. In other words, homelessness has little or nothing to do with personal responsibility, or lack thereof. It’s a consequence of large-scale economic decisions made by landlords and bosses. [...]

— Alex Skopic

[fahye]

book recs: feb 2024

(disclaimer: I have spent nearly three months languishing and sullen with post-COVID symptoms and have read, over dec-feb, eighty-one books. this is a ruthlessly streamlined list of recs that does not include, uh, all the rereading of sarah maclean and charlie adhara and georgette heyer books.)

AT FIRST SPITE by olivia dade - what if I moved in next to the man who ruined my engagement to his younger brother, and tried to ruin his life by playing monsterfucking audiobooks really loudly?? a heartfelt and lovely romance that also expertly sets up a great small-town setting for an ongoing series.

THE REFORMATORY by tananarive due - historical horror based on the existence of a real school for boys, clear-eyed and brutal in showing the the effect of racist systems in the 1950s american south. compelling as hell. even if you're not usually into horror, I'd recommend this: the ghost aspect is light-handed and really not as important as the horror of what humans do to other humans.

SOMETHING WILD & WONDERFUL by anita kelly - this is a m/m romance about walking the pacific crest trail which made me see the appeal of very long walks. a miracle! it's gentle and emotional and well put together; the characters really grabbed me.

THE BELL IN THE FOG by lev a.c. rosen - the followup to 'lavender house', and somehow even better?? a historical mystery series featuring a queer private eye in 1950s san francisco who looks into crimes against other queer people. amazing queer history! ACAB! I hope there are fifty more books in this series.

FEAST WHILE YOU CAN* by mikaella clements & onjuli datta - beautiful, greedy, terrifying small-town horror that is also a fucking fantastic, gorgeously written sapphic love story. this one IS for the horror fans. it gave me the absolute creeps but I couldn't put it down.

LADY EVE'S LAST CON* by rebecca fraimow - I described this on bsky as 'if you like Leverage, space opera, old screwball comedies, and dashing sapphics who are at all times spiritually wearing a leather jacket: this one is for you' and I stand by that. huge amounts of fun.

LONG LIVE EVIL* by sarah rees brennan - I will be screaming from here until forever about SRB's first adult fantasy book. if you like the isekai'd-into-a-villain-character setup and want it to be hilarious, genre-savvy and wildly angry and clever, you will roll around in this like a blood-stained mud puddle and then beg for more.

THE LAST HOUR BETWEEN WORLDS* by melissa caruso - really clever and original fantasy about a woman on maternity leave who gets dragged into saving a cocktail party which is falling through increasingly murderous and bizarre dimensions. LISTEN, JUST GO WITH IT. it's a seriously cool adventure.

YOU SHOULD BE SO LUCKY* by cat sebastian - yes, it's another m/m romance about queer history in the mid 20th century, this one between a baseball player and the journalist assigned to write a story about his slump. made me care about baseball. cat is a genius.

*I read these as ARCs, they're not available yet but consider preordering or keep your eye out for them!

[nonsensology]

So I've had these Grunkle Stan crackships on my mind for almost a year now. Could be interpreted as platonic, but I think there's great and fascinating potential if interpreted fully romantic. Full musings and explanations below (Warning: very disjointed and random).

Uncle Chan from Jackie Chan Adventures

Maybe Ford and Stan stumble across the Chans on one of their globe-trotting adventures. Both groups fight off the same supernatural threat and surprise each other with their ease and familiarity with the weird and fantastical.

I feel Uncle is kind of a weird in-between of Ford and Stan. He is knowledgeable but not a nerd like Ford, is generally cranky but doesn't get into trouble like Stan does, although he does have a level of disregard towards authority if it gets in the way of his goals. He's quick to do research instead of impulsively charging into a situation.

I think Uncle's dynamic with Stan would be hilarious. They would argue a lot on how to deal with a threat, but once they agree to work together, they could kick ass. Once he gets past his initial annoyance, Stan would probably enjoy Uncle's quips, even more so when he realizes that Uncle does not say them to be funny, he's just naturally snarky.

Uncle is never shown having any romantic interest or relationships, so I kind of headcanon him as ace, but I think it would be really interesting to see what kind of queerplatonic relationship he and Stan could form.

Jade and Mabel would probably hit it off immediately, and while Jade isn't as studious as Dipper, she also has an enthusiasm for the supernatural so she'd probably get along decently with him. She'd also probably think Stan and Ford are super cool, especially considering their lax attitude toward giving children weapons. Though they do still take the kids' safety very seriously.

Jackie is doubtful of Stan, much like he was with Viper, but seeing Stan look out for the kids would probably endear him a little. Ford might also help ease his worries, and maybe they both could have fun discussion about archeology.

I think Tohru and Soos could get along decently, though Tohru would find Soos' eccentric musings odd at first.

Additionally, Uncle's shop is in San Francisco, practically next door to Dipper and Mabel in Piedmont. The kids would easily visit each other every weekend.

Bruno Madrigal from Encanto

Stan has been to prison in Colombia, so I don't think he'd willingly travel there for fun, and Encanto Valley seems relatively closed off from the rest of the world, so I imagine their meeting is accidental, maybe a result of the Stans getting caught in a storm or something. They stay for a while in the valley while repairing their boat.

Stan might initially be outraged at the idea of the Madrigals not charging anyone for the use of their gifts, but perhaps lightens up when he sees how close-knit the community is. He'd still come up with ways they could show off their powers Mystery Shack style, probably butting heads with Alma in the process, lol. He might encourage Bruno to adapt a more showman-like approach to his seer abilities to make it more presentable and less intimidating.

Bruno and Stan connecting over their shared feelings of isolation from family is definitely what drew me to these two together in the first place. If they ever got serious about their relationship, I can imagine the biggest hurdle would be deciding if they should continue a long-distance relationship, since neither is keen on asking the other to be separated from their family.

Yuuko Ichihara from xxxHolic and Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicle

Major spoiler alerts for both series. It's been many years since I've read them, and Tsubasa had so many plot twists that even CLAMP (the writers) admitted they were confused by the end result. I also might be misremembering some details, so bear with me. Factoring in the plotlines for both series and Gravity Falls would make for an incredible AU fanfic that I unfortunately am not qualified to write.

Due to Yuuko's shop being in Tokyo, a whole ocean away from Oregon, I like to imagine some timey-wimey space mumbo jumbo allowing Yuuko and Stan to meet in the dream realm. Maybe at some point, Yuuko's shop would obtain a door connecting it to the Mystery Shack.

Stan and Yuuko both have a mischievous side, though Yuuko is generally more reserved. They could start out as drinking buddies, though I imagine Stan would probably favor a light beer, while Yuuko loves sake.

They also both use aliases (it is never revealed what Yuuko's real name is), but Yuuko would likely be upfront about it. As their relationship progresses, Stan would probably feel comfortable telling Yuuko his real first name, even after she tells him the supernatural dangers of giving your real name.

While Stan scams his customers, he generally sells harmless entertainment and trinkets, whereas Yuuko grants wishes and operates strictly on an equivalent exchange basis. To quote the wiki, "All of Yuuko's customers must pay a price in order to grant their wishes, which can be no more or no less than the one demanded, or else harm will come to one's way. She is not one to tell the customer the most direct way to solve their problems because in the end, it can only be solved with that person's own realization and resolution to change themselves... Her abilities are not unlimited and may almost seem like a curse as it appears that she is unable to do anything for anyone or grant any gift (other than feelings) without it becoming a binding transaction." 

When Stan finds out just how powerful Yuuko is, I think he might react with a mixture of hesitation and awe, especially when she reveals she knows about his past, and Ford being lost in the multiverse. I am on the fence on whether Yuuko would use her powers to bring Ford home sooner, or let Stan continue working on the portal because he's already close to completing it and this would be significant in defeating Bill.

I found that the main villain of Tsubasa, Fei Wang Reed, surprisingly parallels Stan. Both endanger reality to bring back someone who is lost, but while Stan does it out of love and devotion to his family, Fei Wang Reed only did it in an arrogant plan to prove himself a powerful sorcerer. And in Fei's case, the person is already dead. CLAMP's universe establishes that the dead cannot be brought back to life, and Fei's wish to do so would cause the universe to be destroyed. I wonder if Bill would factor Fei as part of his plans.

Stan also surprisingly shares a lot in common with Fai D Fluorite. Both use their twin's name (Fai's real name is Yuui), and for much of the series Fai's tragic backstory regarding his twin is unknown, and he hides his trauma under a laid back exterior. I think Stan would empathize a lot with Fai, after he finds out his backstory.

Kimihiro Watanuki is revealed to have been created to fill a void left by Syaoran after the latter wished to turn back time. I remember Watanuki's character arc involved realizing that people cared about him. "Don't disappear", "Continue existing". Stan would probably take Watanuki under his wing, much like he did with Soos. Watanuki might find life with the Pines family far more chaotic than he's used to, but slowly warm up.

Yuuko is revealed to have died a long time ago and has basically been in magical stasis due to Clow Reed's unintentional wish. When time finally moves forward again, Yuuko eventually passes on. She doesn't return in the canon series, but Watanuki is stated to have also suspended his time to wait for her return. In this AU, maybe she reincarnates in the past and reunites with Stan and the Pines in the present day.

[sonicmovieupdates]

First encounter

Sonic 3 (2024) - Tokyo, Japan

Sonic X (2003) - Station Square

Sonic Adventure 2 (2001) - Central City aka San Francisco (Lol)

[idontknowreallywhy]

The Last of Them

Not quite sure what this is… it started as a little tribute to David Graham who, while maybe most famous for voicing Parker twice, also brought original Gordon to life.

Then it developed a life of its own and I’m not entirely sure what it became - by its very nature it refers to multiple major character deaths but they are all very old. So I hope it is ok. Maybe don’t read if you’re feeling fragile!

I put them in order of the VAs passing because that seemed right in the circumstances. Apologies if that means it is The Wrong Order for how you imagine it.

💛💛💛💛💛💛💙💚🧡❤️💛💛💛💛💛💛

He never expected to be The Last.

They’d all lived to a good age. They’d all achieved what they wanted to achieve.

But even Tracys didn’t live forever. And Gordon had not expected to be The Last.

Virgil had been first. He was never first at anything and this had been absolutely the last race Scott ever wanted to be beaten in. He took it as a personal affront that the universe seemed to want to run the curtain calls out of order.

Secretly, Gordon believed it had been a stroke of luck. In retrospect, he had been relieved. He knew his tender-hearted brother would have struggled the most at having to say goodbye to one of them and carry on. Gordon knew more than any of them, more than Scott, perhaps even than the man himself, how heavily Virgil carried the burden of attending Scott’s first (thankfully premature) funeral and that his darkest fears had always been centred on doing that again. Perhaps that had been why he’d refused the more experimental, increasingly desperate treatments Scott was lining up. He’d said he was happy, he was content and wanted to face the next adventure at home with his family, ALL of his family, not in a bubble in San Francisco.

Even now, when he closed his eyes, Gordon could still feel that last hand squeeze. Could still hear that rumbling voice telling him he’d done good today. He’d had his brother’s last little throwaway gift - a sketch of a grizzly bear with a squid clinging to its face - engraved at 5x scale on to a steel plate.

As time passed, the voice in his memory became younger, the eyebrows darker.

Scott himself had faltered, hard. But eventually, with the assistance of a horde of grandchildren and great grandchildren, had refocused and thrown himself into the role of patriarch that he’d been reluctant to embrace since Dad had passed. He’d lavished all his vast stores of energy on the subsequent generations as if determined they would know how much he cared before it was too late.

Scott hadn’t expected to outlive TinTin, John or Penny either. But the universe kept shuffling the deck of cards until Grandpa Scott finally gave his last cheeky salute and went to find them.

And then there were two. And Gordon was the oldest. Which had been weird, although expected.

Alan had always hated being the last.

When Gordon had poked his head around the door as the doctor left, his baby brother had been serious, staring out of the window. He’d swallowed and walked quietly over to his bedside but as soon as Gordon had been within reach Alan had turned and punched him in the shoulder and smirked that same irritating little brother smirk he’d smirked for over eight decades:

“Tag!”

Gordon had blamed the tears on tiny, weedy child-knuckles faintly bruising his broad, masculine shoulders.

Alan had just cackled.

Gordon had never expected to be The Last.

But so it had been.

Sometimes the media people dared him to reveal his secret. As if somehow he’d achieved something his brothers had not… As if they had missed a trick… he would look them dead in the eye and swear he’d spliced his DNA with a bowhead whale. At which point they’d usually smile awkwardly, check their notes for references to dementia then back away from the stupid, stupid questions.

He had never expected to be The Last, but as The Last, he had become all of them.

When four generations sat round and told stories of the Tracy family, he was the guardian of the old ones. The original ones. The ones they all knew but pretended not to notice him embellishing. How Scott was faster, Virgil stronger, John more all-knowing, Alan more daring every time the tales were retold.

To the world at large he was a kind of talisman. Whenever IR was mentioned in the media, it became Gordon’s image that was used. Despite having never been in command of either IR or TI, it was his comment people wanted. So he would give one, often irreverent or purely nonsensical and with the same wink his eldest brother had been famous for. It was genetic, after all.

He played unpredictable and eccentric old billionaire nearly as well as he played crazy sentimental Grandpa.

As long as they didn’t ask the stupid questions. He had spent a little while in the pool, gently washing off the lingering taint of today’s holo-interview appearance on some news show. He always did them when asked, the Tracys positive reputation enabled the family to do a lot of good on a global scale and cute old guy Gordon apparently helped. It wasn’t a lot to ask. Scott would have done it, so, therefore, did Gordon. And he would carry on, as long as he had all his marbles. And then maybe just a little longer… to wind them all up.

He sighed. However he might suggest that stricter pre-screening was going to be needed in future.

“So, Mr Tracy, how does it feel to be the last of the old guard?”

He’d swallowed the bitter “How do you think?” The questioner had looked about twelve, they had no idea. No idea how it stung. So he’d called it an honour. Then shifted quickly to the agreed script about their campaign to make Safety and First Aid a compulsory part of the school curriculum in many countries.

Yes, a little more consideration for the ancient squid-man’s lonely heart wouldn’t go amiss. EOS would sort it. He liked EOS. She still got his pop culture references and she hadn’t locked him out of anywhere for years.

His minder for the pool excursion - one of Scott’s great grandkids… or possibly John’s… he was beginning to lose track - patted him on the hand and left him tucked up warmly in a fluffy robe on a lounger to watch the sunset.

Goodness he was tired.

He yawned and wriggled a little, then smiled to himself at the sound of the kids coming out on to the deck arguing about something or other. Alan’s traditional shriek as Virgil yeeted him into the pool was followed swiftly by the combined laughter of the elder trio who claimed the loungers beside and behind Gordon. A count of five, then the littlest bro had his revenge by leaping atop Virgil and soaking him before stealing half of Gordon’s robe and the majority of his elbow room.

Too contented to really complain, Gordon slung an arm over the soggy teen and let his brothers’ voices surround him as he drifted off to sleep.

[vasito-de-leche]

;R1999 JOE - "highest of highs, lowest of lows" (1/2)

Joe x Reader 3.6k words hurt/comfort Being part of Joe's gang has its ups and downs, chaos being the closest thing you have to a stable routine, every single day full of adventures. Your friends pulled you from the rubble and into the light, you've been with them through thick and thin─and yet, as the years pass, it all grows stale. Repetitive, even. Tiring. A new era approaches. You're not strong enough to hold on and withstand the whirlwind of change, and neither is he. Even so, your faith in the dream Joe has given to all of Haight Street never wavers. You'll find a way out, together. But only if he's willing to move on.

long time no see! I've been struggling with writing and got very busy, but I also missed writing reader inserts sooooo much and got a little carried away with this one, hehehoho

it's the first half of joe's sleepy time fic, since I'm still editing the second half o7 I'll post that one as soon as I'm done with it. this also means that the comfort part isn't quite here yet LMFAO

as usual, this is written to be read as platonic or romantic, whatever floats your boat!

Just one more revision, and then I’ll take a break … 

The words repeat in your mind like a mantra. This is your only way to keep your eyelids from closing shut, so heavy with sleep and exhaustion. 

Numbers and letters blur together as you scan through the documents laid in front of you; there are bills and more bills, everything necessary to keep supplies coming and utilities working. It’s gotten harder to manage the business lately with the influence of the Chamber of Commerce still lingering over the neighbourhood, and every time you go outside, you notice all the stores that were forced to close, either bought or chased out of town. You think of all the people you used to know and who watched you and the rest of your friends grow up, now lost somewhere in the country, with no means to reach out to them. 

Your entire life reduced to nothing but empty streets and dusty displays. 

But the world keeps on moving, not waiting for you to catch up. And the atmosphere at Tang’s is the same as always─even at this hour, there are people walking in and out, with small groups scattered about in the booths, but also outside, standing under the neon lights, as if this humble diner were the hottest disco in the entirety of San Francisco. Only a small portion were paying customers, but each and every one of them was a familiar face, the friend of a friend, a soon-to-be-acquaintance. 

You have your boss to thank for this sense of community, the man who united all of Haight Street under the hopeful glimmer of his metal badges, a symbol of his friendship and protection. Of course, you also have him to blame for your current situation, forced to crunch numbers and make ends meet out in the open by the bar. 

Tang’s restaurant is an ancient relic with only a single office where the walls are thick and study enough to pass for an office. That is where you usually fill in all the paperwork and where Becket often goes to take a nap, it’s the perfect place to hide for a much needed break and to hold important meetings─today, similar to last week, it is being used for the latter, with Joe stepping up to the plate and dealing with every single investor interested in “supporting the local businesses.” You can’t be mad at him, even with this subtle sense of urgency and nervousness lingering in the back of your mind, you trust in the dream Joe has given to all of you. If there is a way forward, he would be the one to find it after weeding out all potential dangers.

The sudden, pulsating pain of an incoming headache makes itself known right behind your eyeballs, causing you to cover your eyes. As you apply a gentle pressure and rub soothing circles in slow motions, you allow your mind to rest from the constant stream of red on the documents. You trust Joe, you believe in him. You have to, even if reality continues to knock on your door in an attempt to wake you up from this fleeting dream. 

But how long can this dream last? You all need the sort of help that cannot be gained through camaraderie: money, an investor to keep things afloat, a stable income. 

Everyone knows better than to approach you tonight. That little corner by the bar is your territory, your own personal battlefield; with your disheveled and exhausted appearance, nothing but an empty cup and those piles of documents to keep you company, they all know better than to interrupt. Even so, you still manage to give a friendly wave or a nod whenever someone new calls out your name in greeting. The sound of someone pouring you a drink pulls you away from the chaos of your mind; Sputnik refills your cup with a batch of hot, fresh coffee─the scent reaches you and you thank her with a smile, one she timidly brushes off before delighting you with one of her signature, happy, little spins. And just like that, she floats away to attend the other customers. Of course, her presence doesn’t go unnoticed. Her shift ended hours ago, with no way to pay her for the extra hours or longer shifts, and yet, she remains by her own volition. 

Your eyes drift to the documents and the ocean of red greets you. You wish you could offer her more than a misery of a salary. While you have friends like Pioneer who can offer good insight every once in a while, he is much too idealistic. And the rest are doers, not thinkers. The only other person who would’ve easily tackled the issue from the root … 

Paulina, the little genius of Haight Street. She would’ve known what to do if she were here. 

But she isn’t here anymore, and this isn’t the right way to miss someone. You need to get her out of your head. 

The pleasant heat of your coffee helps drown any unwanted feelings, it burns your insides with a rejuvenating spark, the warm hits your nose and cheeks. Things might be bad now, but you are currently surrounded by the constant sound of lively chatter and the occasional round of laughter. In the crowd, you spot all of your friends; Becket and Hollick, Mercuria and Pioneer. Maich the Peddler catches your eye and raises her glass, a toast in the name of this small community and a small gesture to cheer you on. Bianca sits nearby too, perched on one of the many stools. 

Seeing everyone like this is enough to set your heart at ease from these anxieties. You have all made it this far, supporting everyone in need and feeding as many hungry mouths as possible and if things go well, you won’t have to worry about living paycheck to paycheck.

What follows, however, is not a relaxing night but a series of interruptions, each worse than the last. 

Just as you’re about to take another sip, the office door slams open and you feel someone rushing past the diner and towards the door. Turning around, you recognize that sharply dressed man struggling with the broken door handle as the latest investor Joe promised to take care of, the one he was supposed to make a deal with. He promised. He promised you that this man would walk out of here with a smile on his face and one less suitcase full of money in his possession, but your eyes lock onto it, that hefty suitcase dangling around in his grip as he fumbles about. In your impulsive attempt to stop him and mediate, all you manage to do is get into Joe’s way; he blazes past as well, oblivious to your presence, and knocks over the cup in your hands. 

It falls unceremoniously on the bar, spilling its contents all over your clothes and, most importantly, your hard work. The papers quickly turn an ugly shade of brown, soaking in the warm drink dripping from the counter. And this goes unnoticed in favour of the screaming match between your boss and the business partner that never was, the people in the diner joining the commotion in support of their leader. You don’t even process Sputnik’s attempts at salvaging the documents, eyes glued on your best friend’s back. 

“─And you know where you can shove all those fat stacks of money?!” Joe barks out, that typical and endearing cockiness turning into the bane of your existence as he severs that last thread of hope for the diner. He doesn’t need to finish, of course, the investor has left─you can hear the roaring engine of his car outside, speeding away.  Your heart drops at this.

“Tch, serves ‘em right!” Someone comments, you don’t care to know who. A different person adds, “Hey, boss! You’re slacking off, took you 2 hours to scare off this one. That’s 20 minutes more than the last one.” 

“... J, Is that what you’ve been doing all this time?” Even though your avoid raising your voice, shaking with something you can’t quite place amidst the tight, claustrophobic pressure in your chest, everyone hears this and the diner grows quiet.

“Hey, gimme some credit, would you? These damn suits keep gettin’ more and more annoying, this one wouldn’t shut up about─” Joe stops as soon as he takes in your sorry state. His expression softens, hands hovering over your coffee-stained clothes. “Shit. That was you I hit on the way out? … Here, let me help.” 

Out of the corner of your eye, you spot movement; Pioneer and Mercuria have stood up, intent on helping you out of this sticky mess. But you gently shake your head at them, fearing that more people in your personal space would only serve in pushing you further to the edge. It is already overwhelming enough to have Joe pat awkwardly ─uselessly, even─at your shirt with a napkin, it is hard enough to keep yourself from lashing out at him after such careless display. Still, you manage to rest your shaking hands over his own, gripping onto the leather of his gloves like a plea for help. 

“You promised me the deal would go smoothly.” Voice dropping to a whisper, you force this out without choking in your own grief. It feels silly to feel like this when Joe is looking at you like nothing is wrong. “You─You should’ve taken the deal, J.” 

“We’re not charity cases, we can manage without them, just like we’ve always done, yeah? It ain’t nothing new.” The reply is firm, and yet you can tell he’s trying to find a middle ground with you, anything to keep this from escalating. 

At least he knows he’s in trouble with you. Thus begins the same old song and dance. 

“Maybe improvising worked the first few times, but it’s not going to work forever.” You push forward, still attempting to regulate your breathe. Joe pulls his hand away from yours and continues to dutifully rub the stains of coffee away, a feat both of you know is futile. “We need the plan B before shit hits the fan, not after.” 

He pushes forward as well, brows furrowing and avoiding your gaze. “C’mon, and let those rich suits look into our lives so they can feel better about themselves? To brag about how they help the poor and needy? Let them try to change the way we’ve always done things?” A scoff. “As if. Tsk. This damn stain won’t go away─!” 

“They can pretend to be Mother Teresa for all I care, as long as we get to keep the diner and pay the bills.We’re not doing well, it can’t be any worse than what will happen if we keep things as they are, Joe.” 

Joe, not J. This detail causes him to momentarily flinch, and he finally gives up on this useless task of cleaning you up. It’s only when he slams that used napkin on the counter that he notices the rest of the mess. Joe searches for something in your eyes, he doesn’t find it─or you won’t allow him to─and only then you gain the upper and the right to truly escalate the fight. Unbeknownst to you,  the rest of your friends have begun to clear out of the building─they know better than to get involved. One had to match Joe’s own temper if they wanted to be truly acknowledged by the blacksmith. He might’ve learned how to bend the metals to his will but those close to him learned how to fight fire with fire rather than walk around eggshells around him. 

“You’ve rejected every single person who offered to help. Sooner or later, there’s gonna be no one left to give a shit about us, and we’re already in the negatives!”

“If shit hits the fan, we ask help from others.” Before you can deliver the perfect rebuttal at his hypocrisy, he interrupts as if seeing your intentions from a mile away. “Help from our friends─not the government, those gangs, those rich assholes or the Foundation. People we know we can trust.” 

“Fine. Then what happens when no one else can spare a single bag of groceries or a single dollar for us? What happens when none of them can put their livelihoods on the line anymore because we all have damn bills to pay?” You extend a hand towards the papers, already dissipating. “How many more favors can you cash in before we run out of changes? We’re not getting by just for us five or six anymore, there’s a whole damn group that depends on us now! You heard the sheriff! Everyone carrying these little things? The people they don’t like seeing out in broad daylight? They’re our responsibility now, you’re not a rebellious kid playing around in the streets anymore!” 

You tap on the metal badge pinned to his chest with a little more strength that you intended, this small act gets under his skin because the next time he speaks, he’s screaming. “You think I don’t know that? That I need you to remind me?!” 

“Someone has to with the way you’re acting.” 

“Look, I’m sorry that I bumped into you and ruined the whole thing, but if you’re mad about that, then just say it. Don’t bring up other shit just to pick a fight with me.” 

“You’re trying to pick a fight to get out of the fight I’m trying to have with you right now, what are you, five?!” 

“Funny you say that! ‘Cause I sure wasn’t the one who decided to have this argument out in the open!” 

“You’re being stupidly stubborn.” 

“And you’re being stupidly paranoid. When have I ever failed us, huh? Name one time.” 

One? You can name more than one, you could name as many as the wounds and bruises he’s earned in the name of protecting this community. All the days he’s spent in jail, all the beatings he’s taken, all the meals he skipped so that someone else could eat, all the dangerous stunts done in the name of pride─to you, someone forced to look on as the entire weight of the world is placed on his shoulders, these are all shortcomings. Things that could’ve been easily avoided if he simply listened. But here he is, looking down on you, playing the role of hero because it’s all he’s ever known. But he can’t keep doing this, not to himself, not to you or the rest. 

If she’s not here to stop him, then you will. 

“The day you let Paulina go.” 

It takes everything in your body not to cry the moment those words leave your mouth, hitting their target with a hint of resentment you didn’t think you had in you. 

Joe staggers backwards, his expression shifts; he’s no longer the savior of Haight Street, but your bright-eyed and impulsive neighbour, the tallest kid in the block bragging about his latest feats, the kid in trouble failing to jump over the tall, metal fences, the nosy teenager getting involved with the wrong crowds. An arcanist born in the wrong place at the wrong time. Vulnerability paints his features in a way you recognize, the same pain you’ve experienced throughout your life. The subtle quiver of his bottom lip, although imperceptible to the rest of the world, claws at your chest and knocks the air out of you. 

It hurts more than any punch, any insult, any slice of the knife. It feels cruel to steel your gaze after dropping something like this out of the blue, with Paulina’s departure still fresh in everyone’s minds. But you tell yourself that you have to, if only to prevent anyone else from disappearing on you like that. You can’t handle it, not knowing when will be next. One more business closed, one more child abandoned, one more friend missing. Doesn’t he get tired, too? Isn’t he tired of this happening over and over? 

“That’s unfair. No, that’s … that’s messed up. What is wrong with you tonight?!”

“Did you even listen to her? Or did you just decide that she was wrong from the beginning and ignored everything she had to say? Isn’t that why she refuses to even pick up the phone? Or even answer any of our letters?”  

 “She has nothing to do with us anymore, there’s no damn point in bringing her up when she’s left us for a bunch of stuck up─”

“This isn’t about how you feel about her new life.” When you stand your ground, taking a step forward towards him, he does the same. 

“Then what the hell is it?! Why would you even bring her up in the first place?!” When he pounds his fist on the counter, you do the same.

“Because it’s the only way to get you to fucking listen, J. It’s about the way you act, how you keep throwing away every chance we get at making things better because it always has to be your way! You go on and on about asking each other for help, but when was the last time you actually listened to me, to Hollick, to Pioneer, to any of us?! If we can’t even feed ourselves, then how the hell are we going to feed everyone else? You told me to run the numbers, I ran the damn numbers and this is the shitty hand we’ve been dealt.” 

Suddenly, Joe’s shoulders begin to shake as half a smile, half a grimace settles on his face. He laughs at you, bitterly, mockingly. The type of laugh that can only carry a single message─I know better than you. 

“Those investors, they’re only here because they smell the blood in the water! Can you guarantee that they won’t pull the plug once they see an opening to take everything from us? When you sign those damn contracts, it’s over. That’s how they get trap you. That’s how they take advantage of good people like us. I’ve spent the past few weeks doing nothing but talk to these assholes, and not a single one of them gives a shit about this restaurant or the people here. Wanna know what they all wanted to talk about? Bulldozing the entire thing down. Getting me to convince all our friends to give up their homes and businesses, just so these fancy jerks have all the space in the world to play with.”

You know he’s right, it’s an awful truth you have to acknowledge in the midst of the argument─the Tung Ch’ing Chamber of Commerce did the exact same before, it’s stupid to think that others wouldn’t follow the same pattern as well. And yet… 

“Then throw Pioneer into the damn room when someone else comes to do business with us! Let me, Becket and Hollick be there with you too, damnit J! You have the entire fucking street cheering for you and all you want to do is fix everything on your own! If you weren’t so stubborn, maybe we could even call Paulina and ask her for help, but you’d rather sit here and argue with us about the same damn issue! You’d rather look at us in the face and say that Paulina looks down on us, when you don’t even have the balls to call her! Is that how you want things to be? When I can’t keep paying rent, when I have to hop on a bus and end up who fucking knows where, is that all you will say about me?” 

Silence settles. The hesitation lingering in the air hurts more than anything he could’ve said to you. 

Is that all you are to him? Another naive mind, a nagging voice devoid of any worth? He would rather say goodbye to you and allow the distance to slowly chip away at your friendship, than listen or consider any of your suggestions and ideas. Your arms drop to your sides, suddenly losing every ounce of strength in your body at this sudden realization. The shock on your face must’ve been something if it causes Joe to flinch in surprise. 

You’re tired, so very tired of living in uncertainty; never knowing when you will have the chance to eat, never knowing when your friends will disappear off to greener pastures or silently deported. So tired of fighting for scraps, of living in shadows, of being so close to making a change for the better but having it all ripped out of your hands by a government that doesn’t care. You’re tired of fighting the world and your friends. 

You’re so very tired of being so insignificant in a world that refuses to make space for you, no matter how hard you try to claw your way out of the rubble and poverty. 

And so, you retreat. 

Maybe it’s the last remnants of pride keeping you together, maybe it’s the debilitating exhaustion permeating your bones, but you manage not to stumble and fall over as you brush past him and make your way outside. 

The pair of siblings which you had grown to love so much used to share a dingy room within the diner as children, back when Tang ran the place. And then, one day, you moved right across the street. Throughout all of your childhood, you believed this to be a gift, being able to rush over to play with them as soon as you woke up, and to wave at them from the balcony of your apartment at night. Your best friends, your new family, your new home, all within reach. 

Now, you cross the street knowing very well that there is no place for you to hide from those piercing blue eyes of his. You don’t want him to look at you, not like this. Not as an obstacle and a burden. 

If only you could run far, far away. Just like Paulina did.

[addictedtostorytelling]

→ this whole conversation is so loaded because what sara wants to tell grissom but won’t—but can’t—is there is a hole in her life in the shape of him, and she doesn’t know how to fill it. as she will later reveal in episode 05x12 “snakes,” she moves to vegas for him more than she ever does the job, believing (not without reason) he has asked her to join his team because he wants to up the ante on whatever dizzying, undefined, long-distance thing they’ve been doing for the last two and a half years and try having a romantic relationship in earnest. she imagines when she does so he will become the cure for her lifelong loneliness: the measure of her time when she is away from the lab, her confidante, her partner in adventures, the sharer of her bed, the person she someday comes home to, leading the kind of love-filled existence which before now had always seemed out of her reach. but somehow what she hopes for never transpires. she answers his call, and at first when she arrives in his city, everything seems to be happening as envisioned: he is warm and welcoming, as glad to have her with him as she is to be by his side. only gradually do things shift—does he start by increments pulling away from her, his warmth fading, her welcome wearing out, until by the events of episode 01x16 “too tough to die,” nearly five months have passed since she left san francisco, and not only are she and grissom not a couple but their relationship is actually more distant now than when they lived 400+ miles away from each other. she isn’t sure what she did wrong—what she did to drive him off. all she knows is sitting with him in this dark room, having him preach to her how she needs more in her life than just the job he gave her, has to be some kind of special torture the universe invented to punish her for some grave, unspecified sin. he says she needs diversions, and she wants to shoot back, that’s what you were supposed to be! he asks her what she does for fun, and she only barely holds off from saying he would already know if he had stuck to the original plan; if they were, as intended, having fun together. he advises her she needs something outside of law enforcement, and it’s all she can do not to remind him he was supposed to be her something. he asks her what she likes and the only way she can keep from sobbing, you! i like you! and i thought you liked me back! is to lash out, belligerent, childish, and aching, with a lie, pretending she prefers having nothing in her life but the work which is now the only thing they two share at all. the worst part is, when he reveals to her his “something outside of law enforcement” is nothing more involving or connective than to ride roller coasters, she has some sense he is as lonely as she; his life as empty beyond the lab. she wishes she could ask him then what they’re doing. why they’re both carrying on this way, needlessly alone, when the solution seems so obvious.

[oldtvlover]

Hi gang,

time for another update and with the first San Francisco movie.

The guys get to know some female paramedics and involve in some close rescues. Johnny finds 'eager' Ellen and some trouble and hopes Roy helps him. Ouch!

Enjoy!

P.S.: Pics, as always, come up some time later.

P.P.S.: A belated Happy Birthday to Randy Mantooth!

[philtstone]

ok so originally i tacked this on as a rb to this post abt shawn spencers true calling as a stay at home girldad but then i decided its my blog i can do what i want so im making it its own post. obligatory disclaimer, i love the movies, this is not a dig at their choices, etc etc. anyway. i need to lay out my Vision to the people in a formal capacity

shawn needs a baby because psych was his baby

hear me out

i wont get into like, the thematic/narrative reasons why shawn and jules should have a kid to subvert their mutual Fear of Becoming Their Parents growth, bc that's a whole other dimension that requires its own post. i wont even mention how many times shawn talks about wanting kids in general. but purely based on the narrative role that psych as an agency played in shawn & gus's lives:

psych starts out as shawn and gus embarking on this big adventure that's an actualization of their childhood dreams. from the get go, gus has a day job; psych is an initially just fun, then great and meaningful thing he does in addition to that day job. on the other hand, psych is shawn's main Thing. it's his only real outlet (if we don't count the random 2-day long jobs he does for the bit) and full concentration point for all his energy, creativity, caring, and altruistic impulses. its the first time in his life he's ever committed to a job -- responsibility, long-haul endeavor, whatever -- that uses his skills, intelligence, and compassion in any kind of lasting way.

over the course of the show, shawn and gus's relationship to psych shifts and changes, and it becomes increasingly evident that shawn's personal relationship to psych is a representation of selfless versus selfish motivation within him. as he matures, he's less inclined to use it as a way to prove himself or show off or mask his personal insecurities/arrogance. he becomes more overtly reliant on it as what it was meant to be along: a way for him to help others.

obviously, the boys' evolving relationship with each other, shawns evolving relationship with juliet, and, critically, shawns evolving relationship with his dad are all key mediating variables in his maturation and subsequently his relationship with the business. parallel themes of commitment and responsibility -- shawn proving to his dad that he can be genuinely responsible for something as big as other peoples' well being and shawn proving to juliet that he's capable of committing to her long term -- run and grow here. imo a point where u really see all this exemplified is his willingness to give psych up to earn back juliet's trust in s7.

through all of this, gus still has a day job. that's not to say psych isn't also a hugely important part of his life and key factor in his own growth and maturation, but it's not the focus of his whole life, because gus has always operated with relative (relative ...) moderation. the peak of gus's growth is realizing that what was most important to him all along was being able to live life with the people he loves (shawn) at his side, even if it meant everything was chaotic and messy and imbalanced all the time. his last act of maturation was leaving behind stale security to bravely dive into the sincerity-filled unknown.

shawn on the other hand is fundamentally an obsessive person who will latch onto something and put 112% effort into that thing for as long as it holds his attention, and the show demonstrates to us that very very few things have been able to hold his attention for very long -- except psych. and despite the fact that this tendency changes in his personal relationships, it never really demonstrably changes in his ... employment habits.

we arrive at the end of the show. shawn gives psych up to move to san francisco to be with juliet (again; the selflessness). gus moves with him (again; the growth). so what now?

once again, their detective work does not pay many bills, so gus has his day job. but even with all of his growth, shawn spencer is not a day job kind of guy. juliet is extremely employed, of course (no one even slightly less employed than her could be with shawn long term, employment being not necessarily literal but a spiritual state that gus, too, possesses in spades). it's here that i posit that shawn's psych replacement has to be a baby.

thematically, he's left psych behind. whether or not he does still do detective consulting work is immaterial; psych in its original form has been irrefutably outgrown. he's in a different phase of life now, one that is explicitly marked by his commitment to juliet (who incidentally is the way she is because she never had a father who put her first). if we're going to continue the story, shawn and gus need another big adventure: one that will help them grow in this phase of life just like psych helped them in the last one. given how significant shawn's healing relationship with his dad & realizing how much of who is is comes from his dad was over the course of the series, AND given how raising a child is probably one of the biggest and scariest responsibilities an adult can take on (plus see jules note above), what better great adventure for shawn and gus to embark on than fatherhood?

as with before, gus will be a pharmaceutical salesman on the side, while the more interesting, exciting, meaningful work he does is Being Dad. gus has his baby first, because unlike before, he's comfortable tackling the scary and unpredictable without reservation from the outset.

and, as with before, shawn's kid will be his whole world.

like i said: narratively, shawn does not need a another job. he needs a baby. he needs to be a part time p.i., full time stay at home dad, who is totally, delightfully, chaotically, sincerely obsessed with that kid.

do all these points lead us to believe he'll have a "balanced" approach to parenthood? no way. is this a "healthy" dynamic to have with one's child? unclear. will there be multiple catastrophes along this great journey? undoubtedly. no one ever said he doesn't still need to go to therapy. BUT. 1) shawn's always been intense. we know this. we love this! we wouldn't want to change this about him. 1b) he loves the way his dad loves, and i'd personally be really interested to see a version of that love that's been tempered by shawn's growth and has (correctly) improved on henry's parenting style while retaining the obvious love and devotion. and 2) gus and juliet are right there with him! henry did not have a gus and juliet! everything will be fine!

finally, psych is a story about learning to be brave. all of the characters are forced to learn this, in a multitude of different ways. for shawn, a lot of his fears do stem from his relationship with his dad. having a kid would be his final boss battle! and i for one believe that he can win!

idk. i just think it fits so well. shawn as a dad would be imperfect, messy, sometimes disastrous, and full of love and sincerity -- just like psych was.

has to be a girl tho. amen

[osidius-el-enfatico]

NICO'S SO YOU WANNA READ SOMETHING OTHER THAN MARVEL AND DC

hello everybody, I'm Nico, you might know me from being a fucking hater and a gross nerd and I'm here to tell you that you don't have to be whipped around by the big 2, there's a world of good shit out there, we can go find it together. come, take my hand.

The ones everyone will tell you about

these are the ones you are supposed to read, even if you mainly read big 2 stuff.

go on, read Hellboy (here's a reading order list, it gets dicey but I believe in you). go on, read saga. go on, read blacksad. go on, read something is killing the children. go on, read Locke and key

ok, with these out of the way, let's begin

so you want to read super hero type stuff

1. black hammer by Jeff lemire et al.

in the past, black hammer (the greatest supper hero) and six superheroes of his team save the city but in the process get sucked into a parallel dimension, in the 10 years since they have tried everything to go back to their world without much success, but there's still superheroing to do.

2. minor threats by Patton oswalt et al.

one of the biggest villains in the city murders the robin analogue in this world. which causes the heroes to go hog wild and turn everything into a police state. in the middle of it all, the small time villains who just want to rob a store or turn dogs into cats or whatever are caught in the line of fire of a fight way above their pay grade.

3. America's got powers by Johnathan Ross and Bryan hitch

18 years ago an alien crystal of unknown origin fell from the sky in San Francisco, at that same moment every pregnant woman in the city gave birth to a superpowered child. today, all of the babies are used as gladiators in a reality show that can bring them fame and fortune or death. the only kid to be born that day without superpowers is thrust all the same into the arena to fend for himself.

4. buzzkill by Donny cates and mark reznicek

imagine you're the biggest superhero there is, but to get each of your individual super powers you had to consume a different drug everytime you wanted to use it. imagine that this breaks every single relationship you have and you want to go clean. imagine also that the city still needs you. what is your obligation to your city over yourself?

the first two titles are more akin to big 2 comics with an expansive universe and several smaller titles to accompany the main one.

so you want to read a little freak

1. bone by Jeff Smith

go read bone. do it now. phoney bone gets expelled from his natal city from his latest scheme to get rich. in the process he drags out of the city his cousins smiley bone and fone bone, our hero. in the process of escaping the three get separated and each one gets into his own adventures that unfold a dark tale in the valley they end up on. a dark fantasy comedy for all ages

2. good bye, chunky rice by Craig thompson

a small turtle leaves his home and his friends because he feels he has done all he can in this particular stage of his life. he explores love and loss throughout his trip

3. Krazy Kat by George herriman

this is one of the most influential newspaper strips of the early 20th century. Krazy is a cat in love with ignatz the mouse who fucking hates him. krazy's biggest want in life is to get his love reciprocated, ignatz just wants to throw bricks at krazy's head

so you want to bawl your eyes out

1. primordial by Jeff lemire and Andrea Sorrentino.

one of the scientists in charge of the Laika space launch is convinced she is still up there somewhere and is adamant to get her back. at the same time the last launch with monkey is going into space. on one side we see the scientists working and dealing with the ethical ramifications of their work, on the other we see the critters and their limited sentience of what is happening.

2. the lil depressed boy by Isabel struble and Sina grace

the lil depressed boy (or ldb as everyone calls him) is a sack boy like the one in little big planet, but one who is a fucking nerd and likes indie music and bowling, he navigates through life without direction, finding temporary relief in one thing or another, but ultimately a lost soul just doing whatever he can to stay afloat. you will find this under the author's deadname, but after her transition Isabel seems to have shed the veil that made this autobiographical story happen. good-for-her.gif

3. essex county by jeff lemire

this is a trilogy of books based around the area in which jeff lemire grew up in with only a geographical connection uniting them. a young boy has his whole world turned upside down with no one to guide him through it. a pair of brothers who did everything together grow apart and end up hating each other in adulthood. a rural nurse reckons with how she can only do so much for the people that depend on her. this was also adapted for canadian tv but i really havent seen it yet, so i dont know how that went

so you want to read about important stuff

1. Maus by art spielgman

this probably should have gone in the first part of things everyone tells you to read but I'd be remiss not mentioning it directly. it is the only comic to win a Pulitzer, art spielgman tells us how his father tells him his story during the Holocaust. it is harrowing, raw, and gruesome. but it still retains a glimmer of better things, art's father is funny in his relationship with art which give you little respites to all the shit going on

2. march by John Lewis with Andrew Aydin and Nate Powell

yes, the John Lewis who marched next to Martin Luther king. this is his autobiographical account of the civil rights movement in the 60s. it is insightful but raw. still feeling it all in the present day.

3. Vaincus mais vivants. chile 1973 by Maximilien leroy

I hate french people but they're good at this comic book shit. this Tells the tale of commandante Carmen and commandante Miguel, heads of the MIR (movimiento de izquierda revolucionaria-revolutionary leftist movement) before and during the USA backed coup in Chile in 1973. how they had worked before it went down, and how they hid to try to survive the persecution.

4. footnotes in Gaza by Joe sacco

Joe sacco is a journalist who does comics on the side. in this stand out he tries to tell the story of the Khan Yunis and rafah massacres in 1956 through interviews with palestinians alive at the time, while interweaving the current (to 2003) situation in rafah. another account of the monster that is Israel and the resilience of the Palestinian people.

so you want to laugh

1. the tick by Ben endlund

you have seen the cartoon. the tick is a dumbass who is also the biggest hero in naked city. go read this shit, just pick up whatever volume you find, continuity isn't really a thing here

2. imagine agents by Brian Joines and bachan

this is basically men in black but instead of aliens they have to control and keep the people from knowing about the reality of imaginary friends kids abandon and how they can get out of control. it's so stupid

so you want to read a western

1. east of west by Jonathan hickman and Nick dragotta

much like in reality, the USA is a dystopian land but in this book there's also science fiction. and the only begins that can save that shit hole are the four horsemen of the apocalypse.

2. Shaolin cowboy by Geoff Darrow

like east of west, this mixes science fiction with western. but this is pretty simple. he's a Shaolin monk who is also a cowboy, and he has to get out of situations. one time it was a flying shark, another one it was zombies. and so on and so forth *zizek voice*

3. six gun gorilla by Simon spurrier and Jeff stokely

in a world colonized in the future after earth was ran dry of respurces by greed, one single gunslinger tries to bring order to the land. he happens to be a biologically enhanced gorilla

so you want to get experimental

jimmy corrigan: the smartest kid on earth by chris ware

simply put, this shit is the house of leaves of comics. some dude get the opportunity to meet his dad for the first time at the age of 36. its simple enough but this takes you for a visual ride.

2. asterios polyp by david mazzuchelli

again, this story is simple enough. a professor gets his house torched by thunder and escapes the city to star anew somewhere else. but you get the story told by people who dont exist, jumping between past and present.

3. almost silent by jason

jason's stories are pantomime. his anthropomorphic characters dont emote too much, but you can feel them. this collection of stories focuses on his stories that have almost no dialogue at all.

so you want gays

are you listening? by tillie walden

this isnt a love story. but it is a story of connection and deep understanding, of someone else and yourself. theres also a magical cat in it.

2. laura dean keeps breaking up with me by mariko tamaki and rosemary valero-o'connell

laura dean is the protagonist's on again, off again girlfriend. she is also a cunt. freddy keeps distancing herself from her circle due to laura's games and manipulation. but she has to learn how to keep herself afloat in this vortex.

shit you need to read because its important to the art form

a contract with god by will eisner

this is the originator of the term graphic novel. its a triology of stories which are in the vein of a lot of eisner's comics, simple pictures of life in a jewish neighborhood in new york. but told with such mastery of the craft that they pull you in like nothing else.

2. calvin & hobbes by bill watterson

yeah, yeah. i know. you know calvin and hobbes. you love calvin and hobbes. go read the whole thing from start to finish tho, go do it right now.

3. hicksville by dylan horrocks

this is universailly described as a love letter to comics as a medium. it tells you a biographical account of dylan horrocks life. it also tells you a biographical account of sam zabel, a character of horrock's that appears in much of his ouvre. it also tells you a story of intrigue and mystery surrounding the biggest comic creator in the world, dick burger (yeah, thats his name). it is also my favorite comic.

list of good shit that i couldnt fit into a theme and im also bored of this now so heres just a loooong list

the many deaths of laila starr by ram v and filipe andrade

judas by jeff loveness and jakub rebelka

the loneliness of the long distance cartoonist by adrian tomine

un homme est mort by etienne davodeau and kris

el hombre que vino del cielo by infame & co.

box office poison by alex robinson

fishflies by jeff lemire

andre the giant. life and legend by box carr

le retorneur by freederik peeters

elks run by joshua hale fialkov and noel tuazon

just so happens by fumio obata

ody-c by matt fraction and chris ward

trenches by scott mills

[big-cheesy-productions]

SXSG - RADICAL HIGHWAY Analysis

Okay, I absolutely love all of the "Black Doom just really likes Radical Highway" jokes, because same, bud.

But, like, I'm actually obsessed with the symbolism of it and its inclusion.

It makes sense for the game to keep coming back to this level for a number of reasons. It was Shadow the Hedgehog's first level in his first game. Of course it would be a central callback in the game, just like Green Hill Zone appears again and again for Sonic, and a celebration of his first appearance. This is the nostalgia and callback game after all (and it does it so well). But the way Radical Highway is included and used in SXSG is actually so brilliant.

Okay, bear with me while I talk about Radical Highway as a level and its symbolism originally in Sonic Adventure 2 (My favorite game ever of all time) to set the scene.

Radical Highway is the second Dark level in the game, and the first Shadow level, and the way this level perfectly sets up Shadow as a character and how he compares to Sonic is *chef's kiss*.

Sonic's first level is the famous City Escape. City Escape takes place on the San Francisco-inspired streets of Central City. Sonic is on the streets, running past houses and cars, through parks and neighborhoods. It feels grounded (literally and figuratively). Sonic is among the people. There's a small G.U.N. presence, as they are trying to capture Sonic, but it's a pretty peaceful, sunny day otherwise. Perfect introduction for our boy, Sonic.

In stark contrast, Radical Highway is the complete opposite of City Escape in every way. While City Escape was on the streets of Central City, Radical Highway is above it. There's no cute townhouses, no cars going about their day. It's on high, Golden Gate Bridge-inspired streets, in the dead of night. While City Escape had a small G.U.N. presence, Radical Highway has fighter jets dropping bombs on you as you sprint through the streets and there are G.U.N. robots EVERYWHERE. Even the music is the opposite of City Escape, which is upbeat and campy, with famous lyrics we all know and love. Radical Highway’s music is purely instrumental and has a darker tone, and a more serious hint of urgency (while still being a banger of course). 

While City Escape serves to set up our beloved blue leading man as the carefree speedster who goes where the impulse takes him, Radical Highway sets up everything for Shadow. Assuming you play the Hero Story first, you really don’t know much about Shadow, other than he serves as a rival for Sonic. He only has a few scenes where he crosses paths with Sonic, and in all put the last one, he is always positioned above Sonic, until their final confrontation where they are on even ground, literally and figuratively, because Shadow sees Sonic as an equal in the end, whereas before, he saw Sonic, and everyone else in the world, as beneath him. Hence, the brilliant symbolism of Radical Highway being above everything. He literally starts the level at the highest point on the bridge while looking down at the G.U.N. forces and calls them “pathetic.” (This is where that all began.)

He’s above it all, he’s disconnected, he believes himself superior, and in the cutscene before this level we learn about Maria, and her death, for the first time. We see a flashback to that canon event and when we come back to the present, Shadow promises her revenge, and we learn Shadow’s goals aren’t what they initially seemed when Eggman released him.

It is not until the Final Story that we learn what is going on: Shadow was not originally made as a weapon, but Professor Gerald modified him after the ARK incident and Maria’s death, including modifying his memories. The Shadow we see in Radical Highway is not really Shadow. It’s Gerald, in his insanity and grief, in his righteousness and fury. The promise for revenge is Gerald’s, not Shadow’s.

Later games have Shadow rebuild his memories and sense of self in the wake of all of the meddling from certain Robotniks. Shadow the Hedgehog ‘05 and Sonic ‘06 leave us with a Shadow who is still devastated by his losses, but his mind and convictions are his own, and a Shadow who remembers Maria’s true, unadulterated wish (2010s Sonic games go on to forget all of this, but we’re not talking about that right now). He might not know exactly where his place in the world is, but he knows who he is and what he fights for.

Okay, now where am I going with all of this with SXSG? Why does Black Doom keep bringing Shadow back to Radical Highway, from a storytelling perspective?

Black Doom is manipulative. It’s his whole schtick. Shadow ‘05 constantly has Black Doom trying to use the ARK incident to bring Shadow over to his side and serve him. He is trying to use Shadow’s traumatic memories to get Shadow to remember his hatred for humanity, but good/True Story playthrough Shadow recovers his true memories and remains true to his convictions (God, that game would be so good if it was good). Black Doom’s manipulation doesn’t work and Shadow defeats him. 

Now, in SXSG, Black Doom is back. He knows he can’t use the same tactics as last time. Shadow has his memories. There is nothing that could convince Shadow to willingly join Black Doom. Shadow never flinched when Mephiles was trying to manipulate him in Sonic ‘06. So what does Black Doom do? Memory manipulation is still his thing, so he decides to drag Shadow to Radical Highway, to this moment in time instead, because this moment represents everything that went wrong.

In this moment in time, Maria is dead, Gerald is dead, Shadow’s mind is not his own, he has initiated Gerald’s plan to destroy the world, and the promise he made to Maria is corrupted. And now Black Doom is here too, further warping this memory.

Black Doom is trying to psych Shadow out, because he knows he can’t claim him through pure force. There’s definitely a theme of autonomy in many of Shadow’s stories: He was made as a cure for Maria, Gerald modified his mind, Eggman did too, and Black Doom tries to enforce a claim on him. And he’s using this memory of Radical Highway to push this, to drag him back to his past he’s trying to move on from, to say “you are just a weapon. You are just a tool, to be used and modified. You were never anything more.”

But then, Maria and Gerald are there, saying “you are so much more.” Gerald is there calling him “son,” saying he’s proud of him, and asking him to live for himself. Maria is there saying “you are more than your anger, more than your past, more than what you’re made of.”

And all of this is represented by Radical Highway.

I fucking love Radical Highway.

[radiocurrency]

FANFICTION MASTERPOST

Hi, my name is Jay and I like to write gay vampire smut.

My AO3 account is brandedforeverlame

I am currently publishing a Devil's Minion fanfic series entitled 'If You Had Life Eternal'.

Almost all my fics are Rated E. All with Armand x Daniel as the main pairing unless otherwise stated.

1. Loving You's A Bloodsport

(4016 words)

Post 2x08 turning fic.

After Louis leaves the apartment in Dubai to head to NOLA, Armand decides to reveal all to Daniel.

2. Lestat and Daniel's Grand Adventure (Lessons In How To Provoke Your Maker)

(29,562 words) multichapter. COMPLETE. Lestat and Daniel friendship buddy fic.

It's been one year since Daniel was turned and he still hasn't heard from his maker.

Daniel decides (against his better judgement) to reach out to the only other immortal he knows besides Louis for help to track down Armand.

Also please check out the absolutely awesome fanart my lovely friend Anna @once-delight made for this fic right here. Anna is also the official beta reader for this fic.

3. My kingdom for a kiss upon his shoulder

(3,788 words)

San Francisco, 1978:

Daniel makes a spur of the moment decision and Armand reacts accordingly.

4. Arms Tonite

(4,760 words)

Yes. The fisting fic -

It lay on their kitchen bench, framed in golden light which streamed in through the window of their Tuscan apartment.

“Uh… whose arm is that?”

~~

Daniel has never been fisted and when Armand offers to change that, Daniel can't help but make a comment that brings out the Gremlin™️

5. To All Besotted Souls

(2,564 words)

The first time Armand and Daniel have sex during the chase years.

Pompeii Ruins, Naples, 1976

And now he was here - waiting on this strange demon with whom he was pretty sure he was in love with.

Could you fall in love with the monster under your bed?

Could you fall in love with a guillotine blade as it hung over your neck?

6. My Casual God

(1854 words)

Rashid!Armand x Daniel smut. Before the reveal.

Daniel saw an image of Rashid wearing that fucking low cut v neck black shirt. His dick twitched in interest and he squeezed it gently

Fuck. Wow, Ok. He was going there apparently.

7. Pass the Nirvana

(1590 words)

Daniel has a pussy + impact play

If Daniel was sleeping and Armand wanted his body it was a no brainer.

Wake him the fuck up!

~~

In which Daniel gets a little more than he imagined.

8. So Glad To Meet You (Angeles)

WIP. Multichapter (2 up to far)

Based around my OC Tyler Molloy - Daniel's Grandson. DM as background pairing but focused on Tyler's story and Molloy family bonding/issues/dynamics

Daniel Molloys grandson, Tyler, had an escape plan. He was getting the fuck out of New York and to a fresh start in Los Angeles where he could finally live authentically as himself. He just had to steal his Step Dad's credit card, book a flight, and tell NO ONE where he was going until he got there

Especially not Aunty Kate...

Or Daniel and Armand.

What could go wrong?

--------

And there's plenty more on it's way. I'm almost always writing and love to talk to any fellow DM writers. Please feel free to follow/ask/dm me :)

[raeynbowboi]

Translating the Teen Titans to Faerun

A long time ago I did a post translating the Gaang from Avatar: the Last Airbender to the world and lore of DnD, making Katara a Cleric of Selune, Toph a blind-fighting Ranger, etc. While that was a good first foray into the idea, I wanted to explore the idea again with my favorite team of heroes: the Teen Titans. I've built all of them before, Raven more than anyone else. But today, we're not building the Teen Titans based on their powers. We're building them based on how they would fit into DnD lore as if they were natives of Faerun, born and raised in the setting. How would this change their backstories, or would it simply change their powers? Let's find out.

With a well-crafted team like the Teen Titans, we want to be sure each character stays true to their general party role, and the group works well together in a campaign. An all monk party isn't going to fare as well as a party with diverse roles and classes. So, while we won't get too hung up on this, it's worth thinking about. Robin is the leader, and specializes in stealth, infiltration, and investigation. Cyborg is the meat shield, gadgeteer, and primary doctor. Starfire is the flying warrior princess with laser powers and super strength. Raven is the scholarly wizard with powerful psionic powers from a dark origin and minimal healing powers. Lastly, Beast Boy is the goofball comedic wildcard shapeshifter. These basic ideas we want to keep in tack as much as possible, while filtering the team through the lore of Faerun.

ROBIN

DICK GRAYSON

Before moving to Jump City, Robin mentored under Batman, a master detective and vigilante crimefighter in the crime-infested major city of Gotham. In some Teen Titans media, the Titans are firmly located in San Francisco, California, but even in the cartoon, Jump City appears to be located in southern California. Gotham has influences of major American cities like Detroit and Chicago. Meanwhile, Superman's Metropolis is more closely based on New York City. There are three major cities in Faerun: Waterdeep, Baldur's Gate, and Neverwinter. Of the three, Waterdeep seems the most like New York City as the biggest city in Faerun. Baldur's Gate started as a smuggler's den, mapping well onto Gotham. And that leaves Neverwinter to map onto Los Angeles/San Francisco. This would mean that Batman is a Baldurian nobleman, and that Robin moved from Baldur's Gate to Neverwinter to pursue his own career as an adventurer.

Robin is an ordinary human in every definition of the word. There's nothing special about his bloodline and his biology was not altered in any way. Robin is a Standard Human.

While Robin did begin his career as a performer in the Flying Grayson Circus Act, he's not really a performer anymore. Robin's true training came from being mentored by Bruce Wayne in Baldur's Gate, learning the tricks and tools of crime-fighting, investigation, martial arts, and stealth. We'll say his background is an Investigator for Insight and Investigation proficiency.

It really is worth pointing out that Robin became a villain twice while trying to chase Slade. When he lost to Kotaro, Robin disappeared to the other side of the world for weeks, possibly even a month or longer with little notice. When he broke his arm chasing Johnny Rancid, the entire team tackled him back into his chair thinking he was going to insist on hunting down Rancid in spite of his broken arm, and they were all surprised he was just grabbing the remote. Robin is textbook Chaotic Good.

CLASS

Battle Master Fighter: Fighters are trained warriors. They're soldiers, guards, knights, and faith militants. Battle Masters are experts in strategy and tactical combat. Their maneuvers allow them to command their party, crowd control enemies, or gain advantages in a fight. Robin is well-versed with a variety of tools and weapons, and puts tactics at the forefront of his fighting style. Way of Shadow Monk: while Robin is a skilled martial artist trained by the Grand Master and talking animals, monks possess a mystical, not quite magical power. Their ki is beyond human ability. And a major aspect of both Batman and Robin is the complete lack of supernatural powers. Shadow Monk is not a horrible way to build Robin. He is a martial artist who favors stealth and secrecy. But, it's not the most in-character option there is. Inquisitive Rogue: Rogues do not need to be ruthless cutpurses loyal to some lowly den of thieves. They are simply highly specialized experts in the areas of infiltration, stealth, espionage, forgery, and extraction. It just so happens many use these talents for criminal offenses. Inquisitive Rogues are skilled detectives and investigators. They can study an enemy for weaknesses to exploit, gaining advantage even in a 1v1 scenario and dealing extra damage. It's also worth remembering Robin was trained by Batman, a man often called the world's greatest detective.

Looking at Robin's abilities, backstory, and training, I would ultimately declare him to be an Inquisitive Rogue. They excel at sizing up enemies that are bigger and stronger than them, they're designed to be great detectives, and their littany of skills and talents sure sounds like our Boy Wonder. You could reasonably multiclass with Battle Master Fighter for the maneuvers. Or you could go straight Rogue and just take the Martial Adept feat to gain Maneuvers.

STARFIRE KORRIAND'R

Korriand'r is the princess of Tameran, a planet somewhere in the Vega system. Her race are proud warriors with emotion-heightened powers, including superstrength, flight, and starbolts. Tameraneans are similar to Kryptonians, except they aren't weak to Kryptonite, and they get their powers from emotion instead of the Earth's sun.

There are a few Alien species that Starfire could be:

Astral Elf: Space-faring elves that left the Feywild to explore the stars, Astral Elves have starlight in their eyes, and automatically know either Light, Dancing Lights, or Sacred Flame. Astral Elves can also teleport 30 ft as a bonus action a number of times equal to their proficiency bonus. Dragonborn: Contrary to popular belief, Dragonborn are not the result of a dragon and a bard doing the horizontal monster mash. Rather, they are aliens from the planet Abeir that crossed over to Toril during the Spellplague. Once the unpaid servants of Abeir's dragons, they overthrew their masters and made their own culture. They have a strong warrior culture, and value their clansmen and kin above all else, even faith. Dragonborn aren't always religious as the gods could not hear their prayers on Abeir, but Bahamut is a very popular god for worship in Dragonborn society, and other dragon deities do see worship in Dragonborn society. Githyanki: The Githyanki are the psionic warriors of the Gith race. Once the unpaid servants of the Illithid Empire, they freed themselves from servitude. However, in the aftermath, the Gith separated into two factions: the Githzarai and the Githyanki. The Githyanki serve the undying Lich Queen Vlaakith, hunt Mind Flayers, and ride Red Dragons. They also have a very "the strong eat the weak" mentality, and have extremely harsh policies on failture and usefulness.

While the Astral Elf looks the most like Starfire, I'm going with the race that seems the closest to Tameraneans. I'll be making Starfire a Gold Dragonborn. If the setting allows, you could absolutely make her a Crystal Dragonborn for Radiant energy, but not every setting is going to work for gem dragonborns, so I chose to stick to the classic varieties.

As for her background, Starfire is the Princess of Tameran which could make her work as a Noble. She is a highly skilled fighter which could make her a Soldier. She's also an alien from a far-away planet new to this earth and its strange customs, which could make her a Far Traveler. As being a princess is what shocks the Titans the most, it's what defines her more than the other two things. We'll call Starfire a Noble, but we'll swap out her History proficiency for Athletics, and keep her proficiency in Persuasion. She speaks Draconic as a Dragonborn, as well a language of her choice. We'll go with Gith for flavor, as it's another alien language. If you want a more core rulebook language, Deep Speech is the language of Aberrations. If both those languages feel too alien and you want a language she's more likely to encounter in a campaign, then the strong warrior cultures of Goliaths and Orcs could be nice choices for her, having her speak Giant or Orcish respectively. Because Tameraneans learn languages through lip contact, if you wanted to play up this aspect, you could have Starfire take the Linguist Feat once or twice to learn more languages, but this is entirely optional and mostly for flavor and roleplay.

Starfire always follows her heart. Even when told not to do something, she will do it if she believes it is right, which leans more Chaotic. However, Starfire can also usually be expected to keep her word, dislikes fighting unnecessarily, does not like lying, cheating or stealing. She was even willing to marry Glgrdsklechhh if it meant avoiding war, unaware it was a gambit for Blackfire to gain a powerful artifact in exchange for Starfire's hand in marriage. As such, I would say that Starfire is Neutral Good. She will always do whatever she feels is best in the moment. Whatever course of action she believes will do the most good for the most people.

CLASS

Like with her race, there are a few build options each of which translates Starfire to DnD's world and lore in different ways.

Draconic Bloodline Sorcerer: Being a dragonborn, the Draconic Bloodline Sorcerer translates nicely as her race's natural affinity for draconic magic, mirroring how all Tameraneans have starbolts. She gives up her melee warrior aspects to focus on her dragonborn magic, specializing in Fire magic. Light Domain Cleric: Cleric is a surprisingly good choice for what Starfire would be if raised in the world of DnD. Clerics aren't just healers, some join their faith militant, acting as the sword of their god's divine justice. Clerics can cast radiant spells like Guiding Bolt, Sunbeam, and Sunburst, they're decent frontline warriors, and they heal and support their friends. War is a better fit if she wishes to worship Bahamut, but Light lets Starfire make better use of radiant magic, and also gives her a few fire spells as a Cleric as well, letting her keep the heavy light and fire theme. She may worship Tamara, the Draconic Goddess of Light, Mercy, and Forgiveness. Oath of Devotion Paladin: She starts to really lose her Starbolts at this point, but she puts greater emphasis on her warrior spirit, and she still has radiant smites. Whereas the Cleric angle makes Starfire a better support for her friends and Sorcerer puts all the attention on her starbolts, the Paladin focuses on turning Starfire into a heavy-hitting tank that shakes off the hits her friends can't handle. She still gets some healing with her Healing Touch, and a few healing spells. Starfire fits the mold of fighting for beliefs, as her powers manifest through strong convictions such as righteous fury, boundless confidence, and the joy of flight.

While I was tempted to make Starfire a Draconic Bloodline Sorcerer as a good translation of her canon emotion-based powers native to her race, I had to remind myself that we are not just building Starfire. Dragonborn are not Tameraneans. While they have access to draconic magic and blood, draconic sorcery is not a universal thing across their race the way it is with Tameraneans. We are asking what would Starfire be if raised in Faerun? And I don't believe Starfire would be a Sorcerer. However, Cleric and Paladin is a much tighter race. Both gain their powers from convictions and beliefs, which reflects the way Tamaraneans like Starfire draw their power from strong emotions and beliefs. But which one you favor comes down to splitting hairs. Ultimately, I would chalk Starfire up as an Oath of Devotion Paladin. For starters, we are ignoring their canonical powers when picking a class. Paladins are great warriors, and the people of Tameran are a strong and proud warrior race. Dragonborn are not super religious with Dragonborn Clerics being rare, but Paladins are extremely common in Dragonborn society. Finally, their main stats of Strength and Charisma is very fitting and appropriate for Starfire. She is strong and very charming. While I favor Paladin, the divide between Paladins and Clerics is extremely narrow, and being a Light Domain Cleric is not a bad way to build Starfire. She'd have ample access to tons of radiant and fire spells, she'd be able to heal and support her friends, and nothing is stopping her from putting points into Strength as a Cleric and being a decent front-liner. If you want her to draw strength from her convictions, be effective in melee, and be a full spellcaster, then Cleric is an equally great choice. As I said, Paladin only barely squeaks past Cleric in my analysis, and in the first draft, I did originally settle on Cleric. Both work for Starfire, and thus, I'll leave a spell list for both. For her Paladin build, I had Starfire take Magic Initiate: Sorcerer to give her some ranged spell attack options. You could also do a dip into Sorcerer with a Paladin build as opposed to taking the Magic Initiate feat.

PALADIN SPELLS

Bold: Magic Initiate (Sorcerer) Orange: Oath Spells

C Firebolt, Light 1 Burning Hands, Cure Wounds, Protection from Evil & Good, Sanctuary, Searing Smite 2 Branding Smite, Lesser Restoration, Warding Bond, Zone of Truth 3 Blinding Smite, Beacon of Hope, Crusader's Mantle, Daylight, Dispel Magic, Revivify, Spirit Shroud 4 Death Ward, Freedom of Movement, Guardian of Faith, Staggering Smite 5 Banishing Smite, Circle of Power, Commune, Destructive Wave, Flame Strike

CLERIC SPELLS

Orange: Domain Spells

C Guidance, Light, Resistance, Sacred Flame, Spare the Dying, Thaumaturgy 1 Bless, Burning Hands, Guiding Bolt, Healing Word, Faerie Fire, Sanctuary, Shield of Faith 2 Aid, Flaming Sphere, Lesser Restoration, Prayer of Healing, Scorching Ray, Spiritual Weapon 3 Daylight, Fireball, Mass Healing Word, Remove Curse, Spirit Guardians, Spirit Shroud 4 Aura of Life, Banishment, Guardian of Faith, Wall of Fire 5 Commune, Dawn, Flame Strike, Greater Restoration, Holy Weapon, Scrying, Summon Celestial 6 Heal, Sunbeam 7 Divine Word, Fire Storm 8 Sunburst 9 Mass Heal

CYBORG VICTOR STONE

Victor "Vic" Stone is the son of famous cyberneticist Silas Stone that grew up in Detroit. Once a prolific high school athlete, Victor was horribly injured by an explosion at S.T.A.R. Labs caused by an invasion by Darkseid. With his cybernetics expertise, Silas saved Victor's life by infusing his son with the Mother Box.

Because Cyborg was born human but has since been infused with technology, we'll call Cyborg a Variant Human. Why is he not a Warforged? Becaues he was not built the way Grid was. Cyborg is not a robot, so he is not a warforged. He's also shown several times needing to eat and sleep in order to function, two things Warforged do not require. As a Variant Human, we'll give him +1 Strength and +1 Constitution. And we'll add on the Tough feat to increase his durability. Cyborg is the team meat shield, after all.

In terms of background, Cyborg was a high school athlete before the accident, so we'll call him an Athlete for Athletics and Acrobatics.

When Brother Blood steals Cyborg's blue prints, he becomes determined to stop Blood because it's his plans. His technology. He feels it is his responsibility. He similarly gets upset when any of his technology or gadgets is commandeered by villains. He puts his heart and soul into those inventions, and gets very upset when they're hurt or stolen. Cyborg is a lot more laid back than Robin as a leader, but still cares about getting the job done. I find it hard to really say whether he leans more Lawful or Chaotic. He has principles and sticks to them, but he's also left the team multiple times after a heated argument with Robin. I ultimately land on Neutral Good for Cyborg's alignment.

Now, how does his prosthetics come into it? Well, there's an item in DnD called the Prosthetic Limb, a common wondrous item that can replace lost limbs, doesn't require attunement, can be detached, but not against the user's will. But Cyborg's metal body clearly acts like armor, how do we incorporate this? We travel to Theros. Mythic Odysseys of Theros introduced an item called Molten Bronze Skin that comes in Breastplate, Half Plate, and Plate Armor variants. This item molds itself to the wearer's body, allowing them to easily wear clothes over the armor, and making it impossible for someone else to take off. This item does require attunement, but it accomplishes the same effect of giving Cyborg "built-in" armor, the way a Warforged would have.

CLASS

Artillerist Artificer: Artificers are gadgeteers and magical smiths that can defy logic with their inventions. Both Cyborg and his father are experts in cybernetics, metalworking, coding, and engineering. Cyborg built a car, a submarine, and then turned that submarine into a spaceship. The artillerist can make a tiny cannon they can carry with one hand that can fire a force ballista. Just try to say that's not Cyborg's sonic cannon. Champion Fighter: Cyborg is the tank of the party. It's his job to take the hits others wouldn't survive. In a low-tech fantasy world where Artificers don't belong, this version of Cyborg is a blacksmith who forged his own weapons and armor. The Champion is an athlete who prioritized physical strength over other aspects. When Cyborg isn't using his sonic cannon, he's throwing punches and lifting heavy weights, and he was a high school athlete until his accident. This is also a good multiclass option to get both sides of Cyborg: the tech and the muscle.

At minimum, Cyborg needs at least to be level 3 in Artificer to gain his Eldritch Cannon. After that, he can put as many levels into Artificer or Fighter as he wants. If he manages to become a level 11 Fighter, he'll get to make 3 weapon attacks then fire the Force Ballista as a bonus action, giving Cyborg 4 attacks at level 14. If you choose the Unarmed Fighting Style, Cyborg can wreck shop with his fists, making him an effective pugilist. Thanks to Action Surge, he can attack up to 6 times with just his action, and 7 times once you include his Eldritch Cannon. This makes him a pretty effective damage dealer, and the fighter levels would boost his Hit Points to make him a more effective tank. If you choose to take Artificer to level 9, his Force Ballista increases from 2d8 to 3d8. If you're okay with odd numbered levels and losing out on ASI, then Artificer 9/Fighter 11 could work. But for those who like getting ASI, then Artificer 4/Fighter 16 or Artificer 8/Fighter 12 may be more appealing. Just make sure to max out his Strength, and give him good Constitution and Intelligence, while dumping Dexterity. As an Artificer, we'll add Medicine and Perception to his skill list.

SPELLS

Blue: Artillerist Spells

C Light, Mending, Message, Shocking Grasp 1 Alarm, Cure Wounds, Identify, Shield, Thunderwave 2 Heat Metal, Scorching Ray, Shatter, Vortex Warp, Web 3 Fireball, Glyph of Warding, Haste, Tiny Servant, Wind Wall 4 Fabricate, Ice Storm, Mord's Private Sanctum, Summon Construct, Wall of Fire 5 Animate Objects, Cone of Cold, Creation, Greater Restoration, Wall of Force

This spell list was made for those who build Cyborg as a pure Artillerist Artificer, while those who build him as a Fighter multiclass will obviously have fewer spells.

RAVEN RAVEN ROTH

In her youth, Raven's mother Arella was lured into joining a cult that worshipped Trigon. She was chosen to be Trigon's bedmate, and afterwards, was approached by the Monks of Azar. They offered to shelter her and the child from Trigon, agreeing to raise the child in another dimension. A dimension named Azarath.

I believe the best translation of Raven's backstory is that Arella was lured into the cult of a powerful Fiend. Afterward, Arella was approached by Githzerai monks who offered to shelter both her and the unborn child with them in their home: the Chaotic Neutral Plane of Limbo. It would be here in the monasteries among stoic and scholarly Githzerai monks and wizards that Raven would learn to control her emotions, expand her mind, and hone her psionic powers. And one day, she would leave Limbo to return to the Prime Material Plane. This encompasses every part of Raven's backstory: being raised in another dimension, learning to control her emotions, honing her psychic powers.

As a half-demon, Raven translates nicely to Tiefling. Due to her empathy powers to manipulate other people's emotions, we'll go with a Fierna Tiefling. This will give her Friends, Charm Person, and Suggestion.

Having been raised in another plane, I would call Raven a Far Traveler. This grants her proficiency with Insight to get a reading for people's true feelings, and Perception to sense things around her, both of which can be flavored as her empathic powers and her extrasensory abilities. It also grants her proficiency with a Dragonchess Set, and she learns the Abyssal language.

When Robin becomes Slade's apprentice, Raven is the one to remind the team that he's a villain now, and they have to take him down. No matter how much the thought of it upsets her. When Cyborg leaves the team, Raven rationalizes that it's pointless to get upset and to focus on their duty as heroes. When Raven and Starfire switch bodies, Raven explains that she has to remain in control of herself to keep her powers from leaking out of her and destroying everything around her. When Trigon's prophecy comes to pass, Raven reveals that the reason she became a hero was that she wanted to do as much good as she could before the prophecy came to pass, hoping her good deeds would redeem her for the horrible destiny she knew she would one day fulfil. Raven is inarguably a perfect example of Lawful Good.

TRIGON

But what about Raven's father? After all, we're not importing Trigon into the setting, we're picking an existing DnD Fiend to be the stand-in for Trigon. Firstly, we have to settle whether Trigon is a Devil or a Demon, and I believe he is a Demon. He betrays Slade the first chance he gets once it's time to pay up on his side of the deal, and his very presence on Earth changes the entire planet. Demons in DnD are Chaotic Evil, untrustworthy to keep their word. They also have an impact on the world around them that corrupts everything to resemble the Abyss. And prolonged demonic presence only makes these changes worse. But which Demon Lord is her father?

Graz'zt: Graz'zt is an interesting choice because he's actually had a relationship with a human: the witch Tasha. He is the Demon Prince of Lust and Pleasure. Graz'zt will take any opportunity to turn any moment that is sweet, beautiful, and tender into something perverse, degrading, and carnal. If anyone was going to sleep with Arella just to use her to make a kid he can manipulate, it would be Graz'zt. He's not as big as Trigon, but his personality does support that he'd play the waiting game. After all, he used to be a devil before he realized he would never rise high enough to stand beside Asmodeus, and defected to the Demon side. So unlike other Demons, Graz'zt is more clever and patient. It also means Tasha could be a DnD counterpart to Arella, and also gives Raven a grandmother: Baba Yaga. This places Raven in a very prolific magic bloodline of powerful female spellcasters. Before Demogorgon showed up, Graz'zt was contending with Orcus, the Demon Lord of Necromancy for supreme rulership of the Abyss, so he's no slouch in terms of power. He is a Large CR 24 Demon. Baphomet: Baphomet's strongest argument is that he resembles Trigon the most, with his cloven hooves and antlered head. However, Baphomet is more of a king of beasts and brutes, and his general behavior does not support Trigon's plot to conceive Raven. However, Baphomet's sphere of influence is brutality, aggression, rage, and conquest. Red Raven or Dark Raven literally embodies Raven's rage, and anger causes Raven's demonic powers to rise to the surface. Which is on point for Baphomet. The biggest point against Baphomet however is that he favors those with natural weapons such as claws and horns, as his followers should want to rampage and gore with their natural weapons. So a magical daughter like Raven doesn't really fit the bill. This could be her rebelling against his physical aggression mindset, but that's stretching to make it work. Trigon also doesn't care about fighting the Titans, using magic to distract them while he gathers his strength. Baphomet would take glee in the fight, something Trigon does not do. He is a Huge CR 23 Demon. Demogorgon: The Prince of Demons, Demogorgon is the most powerful of all the Demons in the Abyss. He's enormous, and an absolute world-ending level threat. But is he clever enough to plot to conceive Raven? Yes, but only partially. Demogorgon's two heads are basically his left brain and his right brain. One calculating and clever, the other feral and impulsive. The clever head could plan to use Raven as a portal, but the other head might be too impulsive and ruin the plan. He is a Huge CR 26 Demon.

Ultimately, I have to go with Graz'zt as Raven's father. He's not as powerful or as huge as Demogorgon, but he's more manipulative and cunning. He has the patience to wait for his plan to come to fruition, he's manipulative enough to use false love and affection to coerce people into obedience, and he's depraved enough to get a sick pleasure out of using, debasing, and defiling any amount of love shown to him. More importantly, half his brain isn't impulsively trying to undermine every single one of his schemes. While Demogoron is more of a world-ending 'we are so f*cked' threat, Graz'zt is still a Demon Lord. Just because he's prettier does not mean he's not still an enemy that even high level adventurers would struggle with. Graz'zt, after all, is a CR 24 Fiend. Certainly nothing to scoff at. That's only 2 CR below Demogorgon.

CLASS

Raven is clearly a practitioner of arcane magic, but the source of her magic is so muddled that she could be any one of the three main arcane casters.

Aberrant Mind Sorcerer: Raised in Limbo amongst the Githzerai, the Aberrant Mind works well for Raven's backstory. For sorcerers, magic is infused into their very being. They don't need to study or make a deal, they just have a well of magical power innately. How they get this well varies. Usually, it passes along bloodlines. But it can also be like a mutation. One could go to the Shadowfell for Spring Break and return as a Shadow Magic Sorcerer. One can be given a spark of magic by a willing benefactor, they could touch an object that imparts magic to them, or awaken the power in a moment of dire circumstances. They could be born during an eclipse, travel to another plane, or be exposed to the weave itself. Their magic is constantly bubbling up inside of them, and leaking out if they don't contain it. Their magic can be explosive and hard to control. All of which sounds remarkably similar to Raven's powers and the constant struggle she undergoes to contain and control these powers. With Revelation in Flesh, Raven can fly for 10 minutes at a time at the cost of a single Sorcery Point. There's also no limit to how often she can reuse this power, other than her sorcery point pool. Granting Raven something akin to limitless flight, though not exactly. Fiend Warlock: While Raven herself did not make a deal with Trigon, Arella did. Arella was in Trigon's cult. According to Xanathar's Guide to Everything, one way a warlock might be joined to a patron is that their patron has been a benefactor to their family for generations, meaning it is possible to inherit one's otherworldly pact from their parents. There's also something I like to call the Sleeping Beauty Rule. The princess didn't choose to have fairy godmothers, but the king and queen did. The Player's Handbook also highlights that it is entirely possible to stumble into a pact without realizing it, or to become a warlock by simply reading an esoteric tome or touching a sentient blade. As such, it is entirely possible for Raven to be an unwilling warlock of her father. In the show, Trigon says that he gave Raven her powers, and Raven herself says in The End Part III that now that Trigon has no need of her, she no longer has her powers. But this is false, as Raven still has her powers, and uses them to fight back against Trigon. However, this is sort of fuzzy on how this works. Did Trigon really give her those powers, but could not take them away from her, or was Trigon mistaken and was never the source of her power to begin with? There's also the issue that in DnD canon lore, while a warlock Patron can bestow powers, they can't necessarily take them away. And Sorcerers can also have their powers bestowed upon them, further blurring the lines on whether Raven's gifts are more of a sorcerous origin or an otherworldly pact. The w Enchantment Wizard: I've built Raven several times, and every time, she's a Wizard. Raven is the brains of the party. She's a utility spellcaster with a vast knowledge of arcane lore and history. She's a polyglot who speaks several ancient languages, and has a library's worth of creepy esoteric books of arcane lore and eldrtich knowledge in her bedroom. Every spell that deals Psychic damage is under the School of Enchantment, and the school is full of spells that manipulate the mind, the senses, and emotions, all things Raven has displayed the ability to control. But we're not building Raven based on how she behaves in the comics or show. We're building Raven based on DnD lore, and Raven's powers were not cultivated through study. Yes, she learned new spells from Malchior. Yes, she is a highly intelligent person. But scholarly study is not the source of her powers. She does not have a connection to the Weave or any other sort of magical energy in the DC Universe. There are metaphysical forces in DC Comics, such as The Green, The Red, The Black, and other such forces, none of which Raven herself is linked to in any way. As such, I cannot confidently label Raven as a Wizard in accordance with DnD's lore.

Ultimately, I have to go with an Aberrant Mind Sorcerer. Her magic is innate. She works to control and maintain it. And a lack of restraint leads to her magic flooding out of her and impacting the world around her if left uncontrolled. Raven is a Sorcerer. However, she is a good candidate for multiclassing if you so choose. The main reason Raven is said to have left Azarath was due to Trigon finding her, forcing Raven to flee. However, in some versions, it is Raven herself --driven by curiosity -- that seeks her father out. In so doing, alerting him to her location, and dooming Azarath in the process. Either way, the moment of Trigon finding her could be the moment her pact is sealed, multiclassing Raven into a Fiend Warlock. Thus, Raven can start out as a Sorcerer, and possibly dip a level or two into Warlock to boot. This is also a large part of why I didn't make Starfire a Sorcerer. The party doesn't need two sorcerers, and Sorcerer works much better for Raven than it does for Starfire. For my spell recommendation, I will be assuming Raven has 2 levels in Warlock, and 18 levels in Sorcerer. For her Sorcerer skills, we'll give Raven Arcana and History.

SPELLS

*Racial Spells Bold: Aberrant Mind Origin Spells Italics: Warlock Spells Purple: Sorcerer Spells

C Blade Ward, Eldritch Blast, Friends*, Mage Hand, Mending, Message, Mind Sliver, Mold Earth, Prestidigitation, Toll the Dead 1 Arms of Hadar, Catapult, Cause Fear, Charm Person*, Command, Dissonant Whispers, Hex, Shield 2 Calm Emotions, Detect Thoughts, Mind Spike, Suggestion*, Tasha's Mind Whip 3 Counterspell, Hunger of Hadar, Fly, Sending 4 Dimension Door, Evard's Black Tentacles, Raulothim's Psychic Lance, Summon Aberration 5 Bigby's Hand, Rary's Telepathic Bond, Synaptic Static, Telekinesis 6 Globe of Invulnerability 7 Plane Shift, Teleport 8 Demiplane 9 Time Stop or Psychic Scream

ELDRTICH INVOCATIONS

Agonizing Blast

Eldritch Sight

BEAST BOY GARFIELD LOGAN

Garfield Logan was born an ordinary human, but when he became sick as a child, his father injected him with a serum using the DnA of a green monkey. The serum saved Beast Boy's life, but he turned completely green as a result, and unlocked his shapeshifting powers. Beast Boy can turn into more than just garden variety zoo animals. He has turned into alien lifeforms, microorganisms, dinosaurs, and dragons. The Werebeast Form he got in the 2003 cartoon episode "The Beast Within" later became Comic Cannon when Beast Boy was captured by Lupus, a minor werewolf villain. Beast Boy's best skill lies in his wild card shenanigans, as he can do things like turn into a whale to make use of how quickly whales think to artificially inflate his intelligence. When the Borneo Rainforest faced extinction, Beast Boy and Swamp Thing worked together to restore the ecosystem. Swamp Thing provided the seeds and flora, and then Beast Boy dispersed himself into a swarm of insects to help pollinate and stimulate the regrowth of the rainforest. Raven even tells Swamp Thing that when Beast Boy does this, he risks losing small parts of himself should anything happen to his many insect forms, but he takes on these risks willingly for the benefit of nature. While Beast Boy's green skin and shapeshifting are a result of the monkey serum he was injected with, Beast Boy's actual ability to shapeshift comes from a metaphysical energy field in the DC Universe called The Red. Think of it like the Force but specifically for all animal life forces in the universe. A similar force called The Green caters to all plant life in the universe, and this power is wielded by characters like Swamp Thing and Poison Ivy.

In terms of his race, because Beast Boy was a normal human until he turned green, I'd have to chalk him up as a Variant Human. Because he's short and green, there is a primal urge to make him a Goblin, and it would be cute, but inaccurate. There's also an urge to make him one of the partially bestial races like Leonin, Hadozee, Satyr, Minotaur, or Yuan-Ti. Even Simic Hybrid has a valid excuse to be in consideration. However, because Beast Boy was born human, I have to go with such. We'll give him +1 Wisdom, +1 Dexterity, and the Charger feat to dash into melee range and get a free attack out of it.

Beast Boy has pretty much always been a hero, first being adopted by the Doom Patrol, and later joining the Teen Titans. Momento ran the Doom Patrol like a military outfit, and Beast Boy grew up respecting rank and following orders. As such, I'd call him a Soldier making him proficient in Athletics, but we'll substitute in Performance to replace Intimidation.

Beast Boy wants to do good, but he's also the Lancer to Robin's stoic serious Leader. Beast Boy is a goofball knucklehead who often shows little regard for the rules. Upon running into the Doom Patrol again, Momento chastises Beast Boy for prioritizing his team's safety over completing the mission. He's usually also the first to suggest bizarre plans or spout off ridiculous theories. As such, I would say Beast Boy is Chaotic Good. He'll do what's right, just in a very unorthodox way.

CLASS

Moon Druid: the most obvious choice, Druid is the only class in the game with access to Wildshape, the ability to shapeshift into animals. Although Beast Boy's powers were originally from genetic experiments gone wrong, his current lore makes Beast Boy connected to The Red, a metaphysical energy that links all animal life in the universe under the Parliament of Limbs. The Red is closely connected to The Green, which characters like Swamp Thing and Poison Ivy are connected to. Due to his connection to the energy of all living animals, Druid is fitting for Beast Boy. The Circle of the Moon is the most fitting option, granting Beast Boy Combat Wildshape. Lycan Blood Hunter: Before he was connected to the Red, Beast Boy's powers were a form of genetic mutation. Blood Hunters are the class that deal with altered DnA. While Beast Boy can't turn into every animal, his Lycan form is suitably animalistic and primal. It can also be a good option if you want to specifically play into the WereBeast form from the episode "The Beast Within". Because Beast Boy lacks supernatural powers beyond his shapeshifting, this version of Beast Boy sacrifices the variety of his wildshaping to keep him a strictly martial character. The Path of the Beast Barbarian also works, but Beast Boy only really has rage issues in "The Beast Within", and it is not otherwise a core aspect of his character, to the point that I didn't feel Barbarian was a good fit for his character. Valour Bard: If we ignore his powers entirely, then Beast Boy's role in the group is comedic relief and unexpected wildcard, which sounds like a Bard. Polymorph is on the Bard spell list, giving Beast Boy a backdoor method of wild shaping without being a druid. Through magical secrets, Bards can also pick up spells from other spell lists, letting Beast Boy pick up Druid spells like Web, Insect Plague, Summon Beast, Conjure Animals, and Guardian of Nature for the Primal Beast form. None of the subclasses jumped out to me for Beast Boy, but Valour Bards are great cheerleaders and sidekicks. Beast Boy has a chronic people pleaser mentality, and uses humor to lift his friends' spirits. Beast Master Ranger: Much like the Bard, this class option doesn't really fit Beast Boy, but it works as a variant build option that rather than being a full caster druid, Beast Boy protects his animal brethren as a mighty hunter. Tigers, Cheetahs, Lions, Gorillas, Elephants, and Rhinos are among his favorite animals to turn into, and would work well as Beasts of the Land. He also favors turning into a Hawk, Falcon, or Pterodactyl for a Beast of the Air. If you want a Beast of the Sea, he tends to favor Crocodiles, Sharks, Octopi, Whales, Swordfish, and Turtles.

While each of these offers interesting character angles, I obviously have to chalk up Beast Boy as a Circle of the Moon Druid. The Lycan Blood Hunter is a very close second choice, but lacks the connection to nature that Beast Boy (especially his Comic counterpart) definitely has. The bard was mostly thrown in to consider his personality, and it wasn't a terrible idea. He is funny, and would absolutely spam Vicious Mockery. A Beast Boy native to Faerun becoming a funny bard feels very organic to his character. But Druid feels just as organic, if not more-so. Finally, the Beast Master was pretty much thrown out as an extra idea, but not one I was taking seriously. Thematically, the idea of Beast Boy as a Lorax but for P.E.T.A. is interesting. Using his bond with animals to protect other animals. But the Druid was the clear winner. For his Druid skills, we'll give Beast Boy Animal Handling and Perception.

SPELLS

Because Beast Boy does not really have magical powers beyond his wildshaping, I put together his spell list by trying to focus on shapeshifting, summoning animal companions, and any other bodily augmentation spell I could find. Spells that change some aspect of a person's body or enhances their senses in some way. I steered clear of any spell that felt too plant-themed or elemental, as Beast Boy is more connected to beasts than he is to storms or the elements.

C Druidcraft, Guidance, Infestation, Primal Savagery 1 Absorb Elements, Animal Friendship, Beast Bond, Speak With Animals 2 Animal Messenger, Beast Sense, Darkvision, Enhance Ability, Enlarge/Reduce, Locate Animals and Plants, Summon Beast 3 Conjure Animals, Protection from Energy, Water Breathing 4 Charm Monster, Dominate Beast, Giant Insect, Guardian of Nature, Polymorph 5 Commune with Nature, Insect Plague 6 Primordial Ward 7 Draconic Transformation 8 Animal Shapes 9 Shapechange

I will say, more than anyone else, his spell list really surprised me. I've always avoided building Beast Boy and hated the idea of him being a druid because it meant giving him spells. But I am surprisingly content with the spell list I have devised for him. It puts all the correct emphasis where it should be: on making Beast Boy the master of body modification, as well as allowing him to channel The Red as well through his animal spells. I used to think Beast Boy didn't work flavor-wise as a Druid, and now I can't believe I ever thought to build him any other way.

TERRA TARA MARKOV

Terra is yet another princess, this time the illegitimate daughter of King Viktor Markov of Markovia. In the Comics, she made her living as a mercenary and criminal, taking odd jobs to get by, while in the show, Terra is a wandering homeless teen. In the comics, Tara was already working for Deathstroke before she met the Titans, while in the show, Terra met the Titans before she met Slade. This is to say, Terra has two completely different personalities. Comics Tara is a villain through-and-through, while Show Terra is a misguided hero turned villain turned reformed villain. Because the other characters are mostly going by their show counterparts, I'll mostly be looking at the Comics version of Tara only to answer any questions about her backstory we don't have from the show. The most important detail from the comics is that Tara's half-brother, Geo-Force (Prince Brion Markov), also has geokinetic powers. However, these powers are not signs of a magical bloodline, as neither King Viktor nor King Gregor Markov had these same powers. Their powers came about from the experiments of Helga Jace, the royal scientist of Markovia. Later, Brion's wife, Denise Howard, exposed herself to the same energies, turning her into Geode. Both Denise and Tara suffered from mental instability after the experiment, suggesting that the source of their powers had a debilitating effect on their mental states. Tara hated pretty much everyone and everything, while Denise desired to kill her own husband. In the comics, Tara was at one point part of the Black Lantern Corp, which raise their members as zombies to harness the power of death and hatred. This zombie Tara then sought revenge on the Teen Titans. I won't be covering this, but thought it was neat trivia.

We're going to stick mainly to the show's lore, so we'll call Terra a Variant Human since her powers are a result of scientific experimentation. We'll give her +1 Dexterity, +1 Wisdom and the Actor feat so she can pretend to be somebody else.

For her background, Terra is a wandering homeless kid. We'll call her an Outlander for Athletics and Survival. However, if you want to play more into Tara's backstory, then Criminal, Spy, Urban Bounty Hunter, and Haunted One could also work.

Show Terra's alignment seems to me to be True Neutral. She joins the Titans because it's offered. She works with Slade because he's an option. It never feels like her betrayal is personal until after Beast Boy turns his back on her. Up until then, she's hesitant and guilty about it. Terra looks out for Terra. That to me says True Neutral. Terra never seems to care that much about helping people or stopping villains. It was always more about just wanting to belong and to have a home. No strong convictions to be a hero or a villain. Which explains why The Girl Who Might Be Terra in Things Change is just an ordinary school girl. Not some great hero or wicked villain. If you're going by Comics Tara, that's straight up Chaotic Evil. The girl hated everyone and everything, and wanted a horizontal relationship with a middle-aged man. Comics Tara was just really unstable. I mean, she saw a Jerricho-possessed Deathstroke freeing the Titans, and instead of talking to him or trying to figure out what was going on, she just pushed the Big Red Button and brought the building down on herself in an attempt to take everyone with her.

CLASS

Terra's class is tricky because unlike Starfire with her light and fire theme, or Raven's psionics and general magic, there's not really a clean and simple class for Earth-based spells. Druids are connected to nature, and Sorcerers and Wizards have pretty wide elemental coverage, but there's not a clear and clean answer like with the other titans. So, let's look at our options:

Wild Magic Sorcerer: While there was a Stone Sorcerer, this subclass never made it past Unearthed Arcana, so we can't really count it. In the show, Terra has poor control over her powers, often causing side effects accidentally. The possibility that the source of her powers also warped her mind in the comics also fits, as wild magic is the pure chaos of the feywild. Sorcerers sometimes get their powers from being exposed to a source of magical energy, visiting other planes, or being born during cosmic events. And the Wild Magic Sorcerer often causes chaos and problems at the table because of the random side effects of their magic, such that a lot of tables hate playing with the subclass because of just how detrimental it can be to have around. Which seems really fitting for Terra. Swarmkeeper Ranger: Like Toph, Terra in the show is an outdoorsy girl who prefers roughing it in the great outdoors. This rough and tumble lifestyle translates well to being a Ranger. The Swarmkeeper can be aided by a swarm of just about anything, and nowhere does it say it has to be sentient. So, Terra could be a ranger aided by a swarm of rocks or sand fighting alongside her. It's certainly an interesting and flavorful option. Rangers get a few earthy spells, but not a ton of them. However, you could always ask your DM to homebrew a rule that would let Ranger Terra pick up some more earthen-based spells from the Druid spell list. Mutant Blood Hunter: If we ignore Terra's powers completely to focus more on where they come from, Terra makes for an interesting Blood Hunter. Her powers are a result of scientific experimentation. Mutants literally alter themselves to fight, fitting that genetic experiment angle nicely. The only difference is that this version of Terra has learned to do it herself. It's not a bad choice. Assassin Rogue: Like the Blood Hunter, the Rogue is being considered without her geokinetic powers in mind. Rather, I'm looking at the Rogue because of how rogues are often infiltrators, spies, and thieves. I chose the Assassin as they have the ability to create a false identity, which is very fitting for Terra and the Judas Contract. Whispers Bard: This one is being suggested mostly for the worldbuilding implications. Bards from the College of Whispers work as spies and saboteurs, infiltrating parties and guilds disguised as other kinds of bards, then selling their cohort's secrets back to whatever spy network they serve. They literally pull off a Judas Contract as a Subclass. And with their Magical Secrets, a Whispers Bard Terra can pick up the few spells that actually let her throw rocks.

If we were just building Terra based on her powers, Wild Magic could have been a decent fit thematically. However, the purpose of this post is to ask ourselves 'what would the Teen Titans be if they were born and raised in Faerun?' And being exposed to the crazy magic of the Feywild just doesn't feel right for Terra. Whispers Bard creates an interesting angle for roleplay, but it caters more to players wanting to play more into her Comic Book Tara counterpart. The willing traitor. Whispers works great for a villainous version of Terra, but not for Show Terra. Blood Hunter and Assassin Rogue are decent ideas, but Terra isn't much of a scientist, and again, Assassin caters much more to Comics Tara than Show Terra. Ultimately, I have to go with the Swarmkeeper Ranger for Terra. As a girl roughing it in the great outdoors, sleeping in caves, and taking care of herself, becoming a ranger seems like a natural extension of the lifestyle she was already leading by the time she met the Titans. And if we're asking what the characters would become if raised in Faerun, that's a pretty cut and dry answer. Terra would have naturally gravitated toward the life of a roaming Ranger, aided by swarms of rocks and sand. Terra Markov is a Swarmkeeper Ranger. For her Ranger skills, we'll give Terra Perception and Stealth. If you want to give her Deception, swap one of the background skills she gets from Outlander, then pick up the dropped skill from the Ranger skill list.

SPELLS

While we decided to make Terra a Swarmkeeper Ranger, it does sacrifice a lot of her Earth-based abilties. However, if you have an open-minded DM, Terra does get a few spells from both Primal Awareness and the Swarmkeeper Subclass that don't quite fit the theme, and a cool DM might be okay with letting you make a few substitutions for Terra's spell list, pulling more Earth-based spells from the Druid and Wizard spell list as an exchange for the excess spells than the base Ranger class gives her. But even without homebrewing in more Earth magic, Terra still gets a few stone-based spells, and Wrath of Nature can let Terra chuck rocks at enemies every turn as a bonus action so long as she maintains concentration on the spell. So even a pure Swarmkeeper Ranger will still get some earthen flavor as Terra. And you could also reflavor spells, such as treating Web like quicksand to keep Terra's earthen flavor.

Italics: Primal Awareness Spells Bold: Swarmkeeper Spells Pink: DM Approved Earth Spells (Homebrew)

C Mage Hand (Mold Earth) 1 Ensnaring Strike, Faerie Fire, Hunter's Mark, Speak With Animals (Catapult, Earth Tremor) 2 Barkskin, Beast Sense, Pass Without Trace, Web (Earthbind, Max's Earthen Grasp) 3 Conjure Barrage, Gaseous Form, Meld Into Stone, Speak With Plants (Erupting Earth, Wall of Sand) 4 Arcane Eye, Locate Creature, Stoneskin, Summon Elemental (Stone Shape) 5 Commune With Nature, Conjure Volley, Insect Plague, Swift Quiver, Wrath of Nature (Transmute Rock, Wall of Stone)

Conclusion

I felt this was an interesting thought experiment. Some characters like Robin and Cyborg changed very little from the last time I built them, while Raven and Beast Boy stayed what I expected but offered new insights into how they fit into the lore of the world. Starfire and Terra had the biggest changes, but those changes I feel are for the better, at least for this post. At least now, you could play a campaign with the Teen Titans while also being completely faithful to DnD lore.