#the first one. i am sobbing over it

[lumiereandcogsworth]

they are, indeed, everything to me (x)

[secriden]

It flays me open to see the way Style is so clearly choosing to love Fadel. The way he does this with eyes wide open, fully seeing and knowing and understanding that Fadel is very much a man with parts at war within himself, who is far from perfect and moreover who will stubbornly cling to his flawed perspectives -- and yet Style chooses and keeps choosing to love Fadel anyway.

And while there is a helplessness to Fadel's love for Style, it is juxtaposed so very beautifully with the way Style's love for Fadel is filled with intention.

It's kind of wonderful how there's nothing idealistic about Style's perception of Fadel. Watch how long Style freezes when Fadel first pulls the gun on Popcorn and Jimmy. Even as they're starting to run away, Style remains petrified, his whole focus fixed on Fadel's hand, on the gun with a (steady, this time) finger on the trigger.

And again, when Fadel threatens to shoot Jimmy, Style's whole body actually jerks in alarm, hands hovering as if he's caught in indecision, before he stands up and tries to physically stay Fadel's hand. Style is acutely aware of the violence that Fadel is capable of and it legitimately terrifies him. Not just because of the physical training that makes Fadel so effortlessly, instinctively lethal, but even more what it says about his metal state and the emotional scars he carries to be able to hurt without thought or care.

It's easy to forget that Style's boldness and defiance in the face of Fadel's threats does not mean that he is unaware or in denial about the deaths which Fadel has orchestrated and been involved with. The choice to keep Popcorn and Jimmy alive is only significant if Style understood that Fadel was fully capable of clinical murder given the justification of being attacked by them.

He's also unflinchingly honest about questioning if Fadel's moral judgement is one that should be trusted. And even more significant is that he calls out how wrong it is that Fadel thinks he has the right to stand as judge and jury at all. It’s kind of wonderful how Style’s love not only doesn’t blind him to Fadel’s faults, it even makes him see the situation more clearly because he so genuinely wants what is best for Fadel.

And we find out this episode that Style is absolutely right to ask those questions!! Fadel has been lied to, used, manipulated; but there's an undeniable aspect of Fadel on some subconscious level choosing to turn a blind eye and trust that Lilly was giving them the 'right' targets in spite of the fact that he knows Lilly isn't a good woman (because we've seen Fadel's fear of her in the way he tries to protect Bison from their 'loving' mother). I remember wondering in episode 1 if the supposedly ethical 'cause' is one which Fadel truly believes in, and I think the fact that he has already tried to leave once tells us that on some level, a quiet voice inside Fadel whispered that there was a falseness at the centre of his crusade.

But the Fadel of right now isn't willing to face this truth just yet. He is still reeling from the discovery of Style and Bison’s double betrayals, still hurting from what he thinks is his unreciprocated love. Right now, Fadel still wants, still needs to feel like he has some control, still needs the wilful self-deception of thinking that his life before Style (without Style) was enough to make him happy. And Fadel would rather pay the price of loneliness (and continuing to hurt someone he knows he still loves) if it means feeling as if the ground he's standing on is solid.

But Fadel has never prepared for someone coming into his life with not only the unwavering determination to look beyond his mask of hostility, but also the ravenous desire and tender care to search and reach for the soft fragility of the light inside his heart. Because as much as Style was challenging and questioning Fadel in this scene, he was also so very clear about the things he sees in Fadel that are worth treasuring. Just look at the gentleness in Style's eyes and the soft way he says "you're pretty decent at your core". The way Style refuses to let Fadel maintain his facade of careless cruelty and clinical detachment to killing, but claims with unshakable certainty that Fadel has never been that self-serving as to kill solely for money.

Style desperately wants Fadel to see the good in himself and to understand and acknowledge that he is so very, very worthy of the adoration Style wants to give him. Can we just pause and take in for a moment: the weight of Style's affection as he presses worshipful kisses to Fadel's injured arm; a silent apology for the hurts already inflicted and wordless promise to care for all of Fadel's injuries in the future.

Style (rock concert; episode 6): "You're doing a lot of second jobs aren't you?" and "Try being someone you want to be."

But Stye's love for Fadel also gives him the courage want better for Fadel. He isn't content to just accept Fadel's life as a hitman; and now that all the secrets are gone, he dares to bluntly ask the questions that he had to hide behind veiled words in episode 6. Style is determined to hold a mirror up to the life Fadel has been living and force Fadel to see the ways it has been eating Fadel up on the inside.

Style is forcing Fadel to face the reality that he does have a choice, that he has options outside of merely surviving this horrible life he feels bound to by fate. (And once again he is right!! Because oh, the harrowing knowledge we, as the audience, now have that it wasn't even fate -- it was the machinations of an evil, scheming, conniving woman who took two grieving and traumatised children and twisted them for her own use! T_T).

But the best part? The part that absolutely fills me with an almost hysterical delight? Style makes it absolutely clear that he isn't asking Fadel to face any of this alone. Because Style understands that Fadel is genuinely terrified -- Style is asking for Fadel to reach for a future together with him beyond this life of a killer, to step off the edge and choose to trust Style again when neither of them know what they'll find at the bottom of that fall.

So Style takes that drop first because what Style does this episode makes me truly feel insane:

He freely calls Fadel faen and owns the unspoken implications of love, commitment, and devotion in that term of address. He promises, over and over that he won't run from Fadel; that his continued presence by Fadel's side is a choice and not a reaction to the gun Style is careful to show he is not intimidated by. He stays unflinchingly honest in everything he does throughout their journey: from his frank desire for Fadel's kiss, to the harrowing vulnerability of his very real fear of death; from the way he obeys Fadel's order to push the car, and also how exhausted he was from the exertion, to the way he stares at the water Fadel is drinking and pointedly says nothing (refuses to ask for any water himself) and then calls out that Fadel offered it to him without prompting.

Style wants Fadel to know that he's seeing everything, that he can hear the silent cries of reluctant care from Fadel's heart, even if Fadel's words are still filled with cold and cruel dismissals, because it makes Style's declarations of love and devotion all the more weighty.

When Style said, "I promise that no matter who you are, I'll still like you" in episode 5, Fadel couldn't trust his words because he didn't have the context of Style already Knowing. But Style has been freed from the shackles of his own lies now; freed to give his promises to Fadel anew with the knowledge that both their secrets have already been stripped bare.

And this time, Style fully respects the boundaries Fadel sets, and acknowledges the storm of anger and hurt in his heart. He isn't demanding for Fadel's forgiveness, nor is he denying that Fadel feels that he deserves recompense.

I remember reading a few takes that Style is simply "restarting" or "continuing" his courtship and episode 8 has totally shifted my perspective on that.

This courtship isn't a parallel, this is a juxtaposition; and the biggest indication of that is the way Style refuses to take anything that Fadel does not give him freely. Style will put himself on display, will offer is body and his heart and ask for Fadel's touch, Fadel's lips, Fadel's heart -- but yet at each crucial moment when Fadel rejects him or turns away, Style's reaction is only one of understanding and compassion and acceptance. Look at the stark difference in these two moments. Look at Style's selfish determination to take in episode 2 as compared to his selfless acceptance of Fadel's right to reject his offer of affection in episode 8.

Because this time his love is real. This time, it's not just empty words dangled to bait a trap accidentally designed to work uniquely for Fadel's fragile heart. This time, Style will place all of his vulnerability in Fadel's hands and take the risk that Fadel will hurt him, that Fadel will be cruel to him, hell that Fadel may actually still kill him at the end of their journey, because Style has made the choice to put Fadel's happiness first. And this is so fucking incredible because I don't think Fadel has had anyone to do that for him since his parents died. Khun Mae certainly didn't, and Bison is his younger brother and the one Fadel has to care for, the one he's responsible for. Who, then, has been around to truly look at Fadel, to see into his heart and the things he desires in his darkest moments, and give him not only what he thinks he wants, but what is best for him?

But the beauty of their narrative is that love has given Style eyes to see true; to see behind Fadel's walls and masks and cruel facade, to the heart of the a man who is still bound up in his trauma and old hurts and isn't ready to let go of his past for the future Style wants to offer him. And all that he saw was worth enough that even with Fadel's gun at hand, even with Fadel sitting literally naked and vulnerable and partially incapacitated because of his broken arm, Style's choice is still to stay.

And I am brought to my knees by this choice because it isn't a thoughtless or careless one: Style literally vows to give his life on his quest to win Fadel back. This is a promise to stay by Fadel side until Fadel either kills him or becomes ready to walk away from his life of violence, because they both know now that these are the only options left.

But Style sees enough in Fadel to make wagering his very life worthwhile, because there's no price Style isn't willing to pay if it means the chance to hold Fadel in his arms again and receive a kiss freely given from the lips of the man he loves.

[ghost-bard]

Might see if i cant do a little reload to the neve/bellara choice in act 3 (??? Or is it late act 2 i fr do not know) just so i can record davrin stopping deirdre from going after bellara bc that scene and the 3 of them in general live rent free in my head and i was paused right after for so long that the recording i thought i saved was just. My paused screen of elgarnan lmao

[unriding]

SWEET EVIE!! omg happy happy birthday to you !! ♥️ i’m sorry if this a bit late, i’m not sure what timezone you’re in :’) i have so much to say but i feel like i could never adequately express how wonderful you are and i also don’t want this to get eaten .. what i will say is that i am so honoured to be able to call you my friend. you are so sweet and honest and pure and just so ! wonderful !! ever since i met you, you’ve always been so kind and supportive of everyone. you’re so thoughtful, always leaving such sweet tags or dropping by inboxes or giving gifts and you inspire me to be kinder as well :’) you make this place feel so much more comfortable and lively. i am always so happy to see you on the dash or in my notifs like yay ! evie’s here !! ^_^ it is so easy to see why everyone here and mr moze loves you so much! you are just so easy to get along with and talk to, so welcoming, like a ray of sunshine peeking through the clouds! i truly don’t think it would feel the same without you. you work so hard to make everyone feel special, but my only wish is that you show yourself the same love and kindness. i know that sometimes you may feel obligated to interact with everyone’s posts, or visit inboxes, or get things done for events and such, but i hope you know that just your presence is more than enough. we all care for you so much and i hope that you take care of yourself too! anyways, i apologize for being all over the place, but i just want to wish you a happy birthday again and i hope that you have a lovely time celebrating and getting spoiled by moze! 🍰🥹 i love you!!!

i wasn’t aware it was your birthday and i feel so horrible because had i known, i would’ve tried to prepare something better for you because you deserve nothing but the best 🥺 i scrambled to make this moevie moodboard before going to bed .. it’s not much, but i hope you like it, even if just a little bit ♡ my main focus the entire time was the beautiful white dress your s/i wears and i know you associate the two of you with these 🐦‍⬛🐕 emojis so i wanted to try and incorporate that as well! i know little to nothing about moze (anything i know about him is through you hehe) and i know i’ve missed out on a lot of moevie info while i was gone, so i hope this is okay ^^;

OH MY GOSH AWEA YOU SWEET SOUL !! 😭 forgive me for how long i have taken to respond to your ask !! i have actually already tried a few times heh, though it ended in failure — i deleted what i wrote because NOOO !! it is not doing her JUSTICE !!! /lh T T !!!

( my response is long .. no pressure to read ofc !! )

firstly oh my gosh, you were not late!! though … if you choose to read this super lengthy message heh, could i …. ask for your timezone perhaps? :> ✨

and for you to say honored .. to be my friend … ? awea !! please picture me reading this, looking at you, then this, then you again — because i am the one feeling this way about you!! i could never put my view of you into words because i literally don’t know how to describe you aside from saying “you’re so awesome” and “i love you” over and over! i have always loved you so much omg, you just … are the spitting image of kindness to me and it’s so difficult to convey that /pos !!!

you are the one so kind to your friends … i see this event you’re hosting! and i see the way you always comment on posts to cheer on your friends .. support them, see them, make sure they’re all doing well 🥺 i always imagine diluc to your side — smiling because his awea is so sweet!! and i too am smiling hehe … i wish you could see the little giggle i let out when you told me to go to sleep !! T T as soon as you liked the post, a part of me was already like .. uh oh! awea caught me! /pos

hehe — oh i adore you so much! i have told you many times how much i adore your aesthetic .. i really do always imagine you in a castle writing to me! i think of castles, i think of red flowers and pretty patterns and cats and diluc and — all things lovely! oh i love you so much, it is so frustrating that i don’t have the words to properly show you how fond i am of you ):

and for you to take notice of the guilt i have when im falling behind in posts and stuff is so sweet to me ): i remember i had made one post saying how guilt was starting to eat me alive, and i do remember you being the one to comment and reassure me ): it was not even intended to be a vent post — though i did feel so miserable and was trying to play it off as ,, lighthearted bahahhaa so i actually did tear up a lot when you had said that! /pos thank you ): this is what i mean by i feel so seen by you — and im sure many others feel the same way as i do! it is so clear to me that you genuinely love and cherish your friends — enough to notice all these tiny shifts in mood and .. you are so quick to help them i )):

it is easy for *me* to see why you are loved! if i ever saw you and diluc passing by, i would quite literally perk up and run over to you to ask for a big hug — i would be so excited lol!! i would be like “oh my gosh AWEEEAA !!!!!” siensjdjjdj

you say you would prepared something better had you known, but this is already ?! this took me many days to recover from /pos !!! 😭😭 you are too kind awea, i really hope you don’t mind if i keep this in a very special part of my phone ( and heart … and blog …… ) because oh )): thank you , thank you !!!??? 🥺🥺 making such a stunning moodboard when you are unfamiliar with moze is the kindest thing ever … i will sob into my hands …. let me properly freak out in tags lol! BUT AH ):

THANK YOU AWEA I LOVE YOU SO MUCH )): REALLY, THANK YOU SO MUCH ))):

[memento-morri-writes]

This is far from my best work, but it's 1:30am, and I needed to get this down before I slept or lost my mind. So here, take a snippet of Rook seeing Zara again for the first time in 3 years.

Trying, and failing, to keep his voice from shaking, [Rook] said “Hello, Captain.” Mouth still open in surprise, [Zara] replied “Well, hello yourself.” The reality of what she was seeing seemed to hit her as she rounded the desk. “Rook, is that really you?” He nodded. “It’s me.” Zara ran towards him, stopping just short of touching him, and said “What did she do to you?” Rook’s heart stuttered and he had to brush his fingers together to confirm Sigmar’s ring was still in place. Could she possibly see through its illusion? But then he remembered what Lanny had said. She knew where you were. His throat clenched and he choked out “Two years.” A wave of grief swept across Zara’s face as she said “I’m so, so sorry.” Rook shook his head vigorously. “It’s not your fault.” Zara ignored him. “It is my fault. I failed you. As your captain, it’s my responsibility to keep you safe, and I failed you.” Rook wanted to say something, to reassure her, but she pushed on. “She sent me letters, told me all the terrible things she was doing to you. I… I let you down.” Those words hit Rook with the force of a dozen cannonballs. Lanny had said that Zara knew Wolf had him, but knowing that Zara had been aware of what Wolf was doing to him… somehow that was more painful than any wound Wolf had ever inflicted. He barely managed to force his next words out around the lump in his throat. “Where were you?” And why didn’t you come? “She said she’d kill you if I came to get you. Or if I hired anyone to get you. You’re standing here because I stopped sailing.” 

(honorary one-time tag for @space-writes bc I remember you enjoyed my other bits about Rook and Zara.)

[daddy-long-legssss]

The Story Behind The Song: Arctic Monkeys’ early ambitions on ‘A Certain Romance’

Lucy Harbron – Far Out Magazine | January 17, 2024

It was 2006. Mortgages were crashing, and businesses were going bust. Tony Blair was on his last legs in office as the longest-serving prime minister since Margaret Thatcher, and the hangover of ‘Cool Brittania’ was beginning to set in with an unexpected ferocity. Things were bleak when a young Alex Turner sang, “There ain’t no romance around there” through the public’s speakers. Arctic Monkeys were about to write themselves into musical history as the voice of a new generation.

The final song on their debut album, there has always been something special about ‘A Certain Romance’. In 2022, after the release of their seventh album, The Car, Turner seemed to find himself reflecting back on that 2006 track. To the musician, that early cut holds a clue to everything that was to come as he said the piece “showed that we did actually have these ambitions beyond what we once thought we were capable of”.

Coming in at over the five-minute mark, ‘A Certain Romance’ almost feels like the Arctic Monkeys’ version of a rock opera, summarising all the themes, feelings and energy that came before it on their seminal album Whatever People Say I Am, That’s What I’m Not. It has the cheekiness of ‘Fake Tales Of San Francisco’ and the catchy instrumentals of hits like ‘Dancing Shoes’ or ‘I Bet That You Look Good On The Dancefloor’. Utilising the northern charm of ‘Mardy Bum’, it stands as a final, neatly summarising point on the social commentary found in their early tracks like ‘From The Ritz To The Rubble’ or ‘Riot Van’. Really, it could be argued that ‘A Certain Romance’ is the ultimate example of Arctic Monkeys’ original sound, perfectly encapsulating all the things that made the world listen up and pay attention.

It’s like they seemed to know that, too, always allowing the song a special place. In fact, it was really the band’s opening remark. Years before the offer of a debut album came around, the group were a well-oiled machine with their own local hits. They had the northern live music scene in their hands as their homemade demo CD was passed around like everyone’s worst-kept secret. Beneath the Boardwalk features eight out of the 13 songs that would be on Whatever People Say I Am, That’s What I’m Not, albeit in a slightly different, lower-quality version. But the opening number, ‘A Certain Romance’, sounds just the same.

It’s all there, from the rolling opening drums to that final guitar solo. Recorded and produced in a rented studio at only age 17, the existence of ‘A Certain Romance’, one of the band’s most explorative and energetic numbers, in this form this early in their career feels like a diamond sitting in a mine. It proves that they were always onto something special.

They never needed any help. In fact, their producer, Jim Abbiss, noted that they even seemed nervous about the help. “I think they were probably a bit weary, like ‘who’s this guy? And is he gonna make our sound this or that.’”

They didn’t want anything to change too much, as the group already had the songs figured out. Turner certainly did, as the track’s meandering narrative about hometown lads, fights, and local boredom is already there. Talking on a podcast, original member Andy Nicholson revealed the story behind the song. “We had a practice room with a pool table in, and we had a party in there, and we invited another band who were friends of ours, and we all had some drinks,” he said. “Then something happened, someone throws a pool cue, someone throws a pool ball, and everyone ends up fighting,” he added, explaining the lyrics, “there’s boys in bands / And kids who like to scrap with pool cues in their hands.”

But the magic of Arctic Monkeys lies in their nuance. What begins as a snooty analysis of his local landscape is a genuinely affectionate take. “Well, over there, there’s friends of mine / What can I say? I’ve known ’em for a long long time / And, yeah, they might overstep the line / But you just cannot get angry in the same way,” Turner sings, looking around at his bandmates and lifelong friends. ‘A Certain Romance’ is not only a time capsule for the group’s beginnings but is an ode to all the people who were there with them. It’s an ode to the hometown that made them and all its various characters.

But as the last guitar solo roars to life, there is an unspoken statement that they’re going to be bigger than what they came from. “I remember when we were recording ‘A Certain Romance’ and having a conversation with the producer about the final guitar solo,” Turner told NME, recalling the moment these songs were reworked for their debut. But they wouldn’t let anyone mess with ‘A Certain Romance’, knowing exactly what they were doing and trying to say with that one. In the 2003 demo version, all the feeling is already there, and Turner wouldn’t risk it.

“There’s something that happens at the end of that track where we break some rules in a single moment,” he continued. What happens at the end of the piece feels even more special, considering how the album was recorded. “These are the songs we wanna do, and I think this is the order we wanna do them in,” Alex Turner told their producer, recounting the conversation in 2007 to RadioX, “And he goes, ‘alright, we’ll try to record them in that order as well.’” As the final song, that last guitar solo is the last thing recorded for the album, standing as a cathartic outlet and a chance for the band to prove themselves.

“We focused on the [emotional] effect of the instrumentals over the words,” Turner reflected on the track, concluding, “and I feel like we’ve been trying to do that again and again since then.”

+

[suddencolds]

. not snz

on healing and on fear (tags)

[cheswirls]

magi rambling

idk it jus hit me out of nowhere how much i love magi fic and how sinja is portrayed in such. imo THEEEE best magi fic of all time is works cowritten by galiko and daphnerunning, those two were genuinely on galaxy brain mega dimension level thinking full time, but like less abt magi meta as a whole and more on how the characters are so true to themselves and their flaws

it's been so long that in not gonna be able to remember who all did it but i def remember all of galiko's sinja fic that also portrayed sinbad/judal to some extent, that it was made very clear in the text how differently and on different footing both relationships stood. judal especially in their hands was written so well in a way that changed how i viewed the character in canon to some extent and in every other piece of fictional media. like how can you write someone so pathetic and deceptive and a bastard and it's all perfectly in character

I've never been into sin/ju and i don't think i ever read anything w them in fic seriously or w/o skimming but i did sit thru enough to know how the galiko/daphne pair brought them forth and made it very wanton-ly obvious that sin is always just manipulating judal and leading him on to get what he wants at the end of it all, but in contrast, it's clear that he so deeply loves ja'far in ways mere words cannot express

to see the relationship dynamics compared and contrasted in fic was always such a treat because sin treats almost everyone like they're a stepping stone used to further his own objectives, but then he treats his advisor like a genuine person. shows real care and concern, becomes inconsolable when ja'far is hurt, refuses to quell his rage for any reason when someone has wronged ja'far. his advisor truly is his precious person that he can strip down out of his title as king and just be sinbad around.

and this is even further glorified when ja'f knows but insists he doesn't!!! playa it off bc sin is king and this is uncouth!!! only to have such moments of weakness when anything goes terribly wrong and he's suddenly on the brink of death, terrified of leaving sin behind all alone, letting himself have just as long as it takes to recover the bare minimum amount to bask in sin's unending devotion. they truly do treat each other differently in canon and otherwise and it's so gratifying to see and realize each time as someone who loves sinja so dearly

[skitskatdacat63]

2009 Malaysian Grand Prix - Jenson Button(ft. Nick Heidfeld & Timo Glock)

[unriding]

EVIE !!!!!

I SAW U USE MY ART AS UR THEME SO I WANNA DO A REMAKE !!! mostly cause the other one was full of mistaks hurrrrr orz

keeping the color palette the same so itd still fit + use softer shading so convey how soft u are + moze is now IN UR HAND !!!! >:3

oh nick :’)

[dangoulains-devotion]

thinking just a bit too hard about how the added depth given to tifa and aerith's friendship only increases the weight threatening to crush tifa after the forgotten capital, she already had so much to carry on her weary shoulders, she's going to have to carry even more when mideel happens, and it doesn't even stop after meteorfall, ohg od oh i love her so much i

[ladysqueakinpip]

not me lying wide awake at 5:30am on a sunday on my day off bc after almost a full year I finally FINALLY realized the implication of the end of remember them from the cyclops saga

[icewindandboringhorror]

The evil slow creep of it being like "haha these will just be quick little side quests, not much effort at all!" and then noticing each one is getting progressively longer than the last, thus no longer being minimal effort.. auGh....

[nowendil]

.

[nauticalfools]

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[acourtofquestions]

Chapter 55 of Tower of Dawn😭