#the figure is so casually leaning back and asking i find it very humorous

[freckled-paints]

"Is this what you wanted?"

[lunarw0rks]

Hey Rachel, how have you been? Can I request 141 + Alejandro + Konig with a f!reader who says things very directly and they don't have anything official, just little flirts here and there and one day she is just looking at them (you choose whether it's in front of other people or not) and they ask what's wrong and she says "I'm just looking at my future husband"? Thank you<333

˖⁺｡˚⋆˙✧⋆｡°⋆࿓ "Looking At My Future Husband" // 141 Headcanons (ale + k)

『♡』 masterlist ♡ rules ♡ ask box Warning(s): established relationship, fem!reader, sfw Word Count: 1k A/N: domestic!fluff is my fav genre, they deserve to be happy and settle down ୧(๑•̀ᗝ•́)૭

______ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐ ┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊ ⋆˚          ✧. ┊         ⋆ ★ 「 ✦ ❝ 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘩𝘶𝘴𝘣𝘢𝘯𝘥 ❞ ✦ 」

⋮ ─── price ୨୧

let's be honest, it's rare for him to date without factoring in marriage early on. he had brought it up before, proposing it like some fantasy — though in his head he was entirely serious.

„we'll find a cabin, few miles out of the city. wedding in the field or the forest, flowers and everything. and all the critters you want, sweetheart.〞is what he said, mere months into the relationship. in the present, he no longer had to wonder if him popping the question would scare you off. you said it all for him, that you wanted him to be your future husband.

of course, you did it when he was half-awake, staring at his morning cup of coffee. ❝Then we'll get hitched. after I've shaved. don't want this mess in the pictures, do we?❞ his gruff morning voice drummed through the dim kitchen as john's fingers played with the whispies on his beard that needed trimmed.

he was humoring you {for now} — but he couldn't be any more serious.

︶꒷꒦��� ๋࣭ ⭑

⋮ ─── simon ୨୧

he's clueless. downright mule-headed. oh, you like him? you mean you've lived with him, shared a bed, cooked him dinner, cuddled with him... and you like him? it's still a shock to simon, no matter the length of the relationship. how he ended up with someone so good to him.

❝husband? you should hate my guts for how I am some days, love.❞ whether the statement was true or not; you didn't hate him, otherwise you wouldn't have said it. he was worth more than he would ever give himself credit for.

he contemplates for a few moments, tapping his fingers against his thigh curiously, ❝alrigh' fine. I do like the sound of that, lovie. but i'm holding you to it, you know that, right?❞ it's only fair. you wouldn't let him live it down if he said something like that. perhaps your self-will is what made you two work so well.

︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ⭑

⋮ ─── soap ୨୧

you said it so casually as if you weren't just staring holes into him for several seconds. then, when he asked why you were staring so long; you turned your back, putting away the remainder of the dinner you just shared.

soap felt his face heat up instantly but concealed it with a smug smirk. ❝future husband, eh? suppose I'm off the hook for droppin' to my knee, then.❞ he questions playfully, slithering an arm around your shoulders. he thought little about the future ahead of him — which was both a flaw and a gift of his. but now that you had mentioned it, even as a jab, he hadn't ever wanted anything more for his future.

his breath tickles your ear as he leans close, infatuated by your firm, unyielding expression. the one you always kept, even in the midst of cheeky banter with him. ❝what can I say? I love me a woman who takes charge...❞

︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ⭑

⋮ ─── gaz ୨୧

kyle always wanted to be one hundred percent sure of his wants and desires. to think them through, to weigh pros and cons. even— no, especially concerning you. marriage was one he hadn't figured out yet, but it had nothing to do with your side of things. could he be a good husband? was he cut out for it? would it end in divorce, just like his parents?

he could only stew for so long, though. and you did the hardest part for him; bringing up the subject. gaz smiles and leans in for a kiss, hooking his arms around your waist. ❝that's my job, love. you should know better.❞

he kept it lowkey — one of his many talents.

but his mind wasn't buzzing, or swamped with hypotheticals about you two as a match. no, he had made up his mind when you said that. he now knew he wanted to marry you, no more existential crisis necessary. ❝we wouldn't do so bad, would we?❞ he asks rhetorically, his tone becoming more playful as he gives your jawline a gentle bite — purely to shatter your stone expression.

︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ⭑

⋮ ─── alejandro ୨୧

he's observant; annoyingly observant. he knew you weren't upset when you were staring into his soul. you wanted to say something to him, a potentially serious expression at that. ❝you're staring at me, querida. use your words.❞ he sets his glass down on the table, then the report in his hands next.

when you said it, you had successfully stroked his ego. as well as made his mind buzz with the wedding he had already mentally pictured a hundred times.

alejandro snickered to himself quietly, eyes roaming you. ❝you would look divine in a wedding dress, amor.❞ then his mind jumped to his family. his sisters, his mother, and any of his other crazy relatives that he dreaded introducing you to when the day came. he loved them to pieces, but his family could be... a handful.

❝ten cuidado con lo que deseas...❞ he mutters to himself, already picturing that overwhelmed look on your face when surrounded by all of them.

︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ⭑

⋮ ─── könig ୨୧

your unflinching stare had him on the edge of his seat. was there a special date he'd forgotten? had he said something to upset you? but, you wouldn't stay silent for this long if you were genuinely peeved. ❝what is it, schatz?❞

and then, you said it.

he could physically feel the tightness in his chest uncoil, the bounce of his leg ceasing just a bit. sure, he could be forward, be direct. but concerning you — his nerves always gnawed at him more aggressively than in the midst of warfare.

❝it would be an honor. just say the words, and we will.❞ he truly would wait if he had to. days, weeks, months; however long it would take you to make him your husband in the present.

‧˚₊•┈┈┈┈୨୧┈┈┈┈•‧₊˚⊹ divider cred. - cafekitsune

translate; ten cuidado con lo que deseas = be careful what you wish for.

[kandisheek]

FIC REC WEEK 47 – CANON DIVERGENCE

Gained in Translation by Annie D (scaramouche)

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: T Words: 11,556 Tags: Humor and Banter, Light-Hearted, First Kiss

Summary: Steve returns to New York and meets Tony for the first time since they’d parted ways after the Chitauri incident. It’s a little awkward at first, but they gain a new rhythm, which is mainly based on their ability to surprise each other and prove those first impressions inaccurate. Set between Captain America: The Winter Soldier and Avengers: Age of Ultron.

Reasons why I love it: I love how we get to see Tony figuring out that Steve is a little shit with a sense of humor, but it's told from Steve's perspective in all these subtle cues, which makes it even better. And oh my god, the moment Steve realizes that he feels something for Tony is one of my favorites in all the fics I've read, it's just so Steve. I adore this fic, and if you haven't read it yet, you are missing out!

Sins of the Father by AvocadoLove

Pairing: Bucky/Tony Rating: T Words: 11,196 Tags: Hostage Situations, Howard is HYDRA, Secret Identity

Summary: Tony's practically become an old hat at being taken hostage, but something's fishier than usual this time around: his captor looks twenty-eight but claims to know Howard Stark, the NYPD negotiator is a SHIELD plant, and what's this about a fleet of helicarriers set to launch? (TWS AU.)

Reasons why I love it: Everything about this is so fricking good – the whole mess with Howard, the way that SHIELD's HYDRA infestation comes to light, the hopeful ending, I love all of it. And of course, the hints of Winteriron bonding are amazing. Also check out the second part of this series, which is a prequel to this one, it adds another layer of awesomeness to this whole thing.

Can You Carry It (With No Regrets) by RayShippouUchiha

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: G Words: 1,722 Tags: Major Character Death, Infinity Gems, Unhappy Ending

Summary: “I know,” Tony tells him softly, eyes wide and soft and lips quirked in a small smile, “it isn’t fair.” Tony’s always been so good at knowing what Steve’s thinking, except for the few times Steve purposefully, actively, lied to him. Times he knows now he’ll never get the chance to make up for. “Focus,” Tony whispers as he leans forward into Steve’s space. “Breathe.”

Reasons why I love it: Aaaah, this hurts SO GOOD! I love the role switch and the way the scene goes down with those subtle differences that make it Stony. And of course, the added regret just makes it all even more tragic. Definitely check this one out, it's amazing!

Party girls don't get hurt by sirona

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: E Words: 12,871 Tags: Age Difference, Misunderstandings, Howard's A+ Parenting

Summary: Steve never slept under the ice. Howard found him, and got him back, and Steve married Peggy, and Howard married Maria, and then there was Tony. This is the story of Tony growing up with Steve very much present in his life, and everything that changed because of it - and some things that didn't.

Reasons why I love it: What do a young Tony Stark who is just as full of snark as you would imagine and a supersoldier not so lost in time make? The recipe for a fantastic fic, that's what. I love the way their relationship develops over time and all of the canon elements that they find their way into the plot. This fic is spectacular, and you should definitely read it!

Symmetry Breaking by Annie D (scaramouche)

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: E Words: 10,824 Tags: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Casual Sex, Happy Ending

Summary: After the Battle of New York, Steve rode off on his motorbike. That's how it went the first time. This time he rides back, all the way to Stark Tower, where he asks Tony for help.

Reasons why I love it: This is such a brilliant take on what might have happened after Steve's little elevator stunt during the Endgame time heist, it's honestly genius. The smut is fantastic, and I love every single line of dialogue that they say to each other, it's so them. This fic is wonderful, and you should definitely read it, if you haven't already!

[writeforfandoms]

Waking Lions 9

Find the series masterlist

You make sure Kate knows that you are Displeased with the current situation. The 141 gets front row seats.

Warnings: Swearing, Ace is a little shit, mention of blood, mention of injury, mention of stitches. Bits of Ace's backstory.

Word count: 1.2k

Wordlessly, Captain set down a laptop, fiddling with it. Masked man settled into a lean against the wall, while Garrick nodded to you and chose a seat with an empty chair between you.

You were really going to dislike this, you could tell. 

“Kate,” Captain greeted, taking a step back from the laptop. 

“John.” Kate sounded the same as ever. You hunched your shoulders a little, feeling the reprimand coming on. “Ace.”

“Katie Kate,” you grumbled. “And here I thought you couldn’t ground me from another continent.”

“You’ve never tested that theory.” The humor was clear there to you, and you huffed. “Figured it’s time you knew everyone, since they’ll be your backup.”

“Backup?” You sat up straight, ignoring the pull in your side. “I don’t do backup, Kate. Or teams. You knew this at one point in time.”

“You also didn’t go poking around Russian business,” Kate shot back, voice a little harder. “You kept your head down, for the most part.”

You blinked once. Ah. The assassin must have gotten a picture of you, although you doubted that would go far. You were very careful about pictures, after all. “So I’ll find a nice little villa to camp out in for a month until they forget about me.” 

“I can’t give you a month. Not yet.” Kate didn’t even sound apologetic. “Not with the intel you brought back on the Russians and AQ.”

“No good deed goes unpunished,” you grumbled, tapping your foot a few times. “What do you need?” 

“Nothing yet,” Kate promised. “But I do need to know that you’re in.”

You sighed, lifting one hand to rub your forehead. “Katie Kate–”

“Ace.” She softened her tone, just a little. “We need the intel and you need the help, for now.”

You tapped one finger against your lips, gaze dropping to the floor. Doing this would set a dangerous precedent - what would stop Captain or Kate from doing this again? Then again, circumstances were unique. You didn’t often get shot, even less frequently got involved in this kind of danger. You and Kate had worked well for years now, you doubted she’d risk that to try something like this again. She understood she would risk losing you altogether. 

So you decided to risk it.

“This is revenge for crashing that date, isn’t it?” you asked, smirking, leaning back in your seat to your somewhat comfortable slouch. 

Kate sighed. “Ace.”

“Never should have introduced you to your wife,” you continued, gaze darting around the room. Garrick’s mouth dropped open, and Soap’s eyes were huge. “You were less meddlesome when you were buried in your work.” 

“You’ve made your point.” But Kate didn’t sound upset. Win. 

“Fine, fine. I’ll play nice. For now.” You shifted, hiding your pain as your side reminded you that yes you had been shot and you did have stitches in. 

“For once.” Kate huffed. “John.”

Captain didn’t quite roll his eyes, but he was amused. “I’ll keep you updated,” he agreed before ending the call.

“Didn’t know anyone could pull that kind of shite on Laswell,” Soap said, openly curious as he eyed you.

You shrugged. “I have special privileges.” But you were maybe feeling a little bit smug. Just a bit. 

Until you felt something wet drip slowly down your side. Aw, fuck. 

“You never finished my tour,” you said to Soap, blatantly ignoring Captain and Masked Wonder now. 

“Uh.” Soap blinked, looking a little bewildered. 

“Medical.” You stood, raising your eyebrows at him.

“I’ll take you,” Garrick volunteered, popping up out of his seat.

“We’re not done here,” Captain rumbled, arms crossed over his chest, eyes on you.

“Yes we are,” you shot back. “This is me playing nice by staying out of your hair.” You started for the door. 

And halted when Masked Wonder stepped in front of it, casually intimidating. He was even taller than Captain, using his height to his advantage to glower down at you. 

“Are you volunteering too? Very sweet of you, but I’ve already got an escort.” You smiled sweetly up at him, resisting the urge to tuck your hands in your pockets, or ball them into fists. 

“You’re bleeding.”

“I’m aware, that’s why I’m trying to get to medical.” You kept calm, ignoring Captain’s muted swear. 

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Captain strode over, waving Masked Menace out of the way and taking your elbow in his hand. 

“Because it’s not a big deal?” You frowned at him, pulling your arm free of his grip. “Look, Captain, this isn’t going to work if you start fussing over every little drop of blood. I do as a matter of fact know my own limits.” 

“Do you?” He gave you a rather impressive side-eye, looking unconvinced. “It doesn’t seem like you do, showing up here not having slept and having gotten shot.”

“Grazed,” you said, frowning at him. “And that was an aberration, not the rule.” 

“Even so.” He deposited you yet again on a cot in medical, crossing his arms over his chest. 

“Shoo.”

He raised one eyebrow slowly. 

“You heard me. I’m not your employee and I don’t want you here. Shoo.” 

For a moment, you were sure he was going to ignore your wishes. Then he nodded once, jaw tight, and left. 

The nurse gave you a look, and you held your hands up. “Don’t even start,” you grumbled. 

While the nurse tutted and replaced the stitch you had popped, you went back to planning how to get out of Dodge. Before you went mad and/or murdered someone. 

(Before Captain had a chance to hurt you.) 

The nurse told you to wait after bandaging you up, probably to find one of your minders again. You just… conveniently ignored that suggestion and sauntered out the other door. 

Let this be a test, then. See how long you could wander. 

Admittedly, sunshine felt nice. It had been… a while since you’d allowed yourself a chance to relax. And you weren’t truly relaxed, not here. You wouldn’t be until you were somewhere far away and alone. But… Well, nobody was going to shoot you here, and there was a bench in the sunshine, and you were kind of tired still…

You jolted awake to someone sitting down next to you. Garrick mercifully gave you a few moments to recombobulate yourself and remember what was going on. 

“You alright?” He kept his voice quiet, looking up at the sky. 

You blinked at him. “Of course.” The answer was easy. It didn’t even occur to you to give him anything more than that.

His lips tightened, just for a moment, before he nodded. “Think Soap’s pulling out a board game, if you want in.” He grinned at you, warm and inviting. But he was smart, this one. He didn’t push, he offered. 

His Captain could learn a thing or two from him. 

“Sure,” you agreed with a shrug, pushing yourself to your feet. “Why not.”

[canichangemyblogname]

Not sure how I feel about the deleted scene drop. I understand 100% why they originally cut it— it’s kinda a useless scene (they would cover or already had covered the same narrative bases in other scenes) that would have thrown the pacing of the episode in a very short season already not renowned for it’s fantastic pacing (y’know… because it’s so short). Plus, imho, the dialogue (writing) comes across as… out of place (if that’s the right word). It’s a bit of an awkward scene. But maybe that’s because I think “shovel talk” (as other fans have called it) over a 34 y/o man is a bit cheugy and I’m also not enjoying the “mother of the 118” role that ABC seems to want to box Hen into (I’m also begging y’all fans to stop calling black women and queer people “sassy”).

I also couldn’t figure out if Tommy was playing dumb or actually that dense, so, at first, the scene seemed— at least to me— like a 180 for a character that has otherwise been portrayed as competent and perceptive. (EDIT: I’ve been leaning toward “he was playing dumb” over “he’s really that dense.” Also, Tommy *does not* strike me as the type to “play dumb” to avoid a question, especially from someone he has a good rapport with, as some fans are suggesting; he strikes me as the type to approach a goofy situation with an old friend with some dry humor. Doesn’t mean my first reaction wasn’t, “🙄 Don’t play dumb, now.”) However, his dialogue did provide some comedy and levity 🤷‍♂️, and I do agree with analyses that paint the whole interaction as a back ‘n forth teasing.

I just personally find the whole “What are your intentions” thing kinda passé and cliche.

So, I’m a bit torn because the scene did also give us:

a second confirmation that Tommy is not pressuring Buck into anything Buck doesn’t want, like a certain subset of fans insist.

confirmation that they’re “taking things slow,” something we know Buck does enjoy. Buck wants his romantic partners to show that they’re also serious about him. He has gone out of his way with previous partners to slow things down or choose people who seem serious about dating. He didn’t have to ask Tommy to slow down like he did Abby or Taylor.

“He’s in ketosis” << literally laughed my ass off, but justice for my man, Buck; he loves carbs. (Joking aside— this is totally in character for Evan “fitness nut” Buckley, who casually talks to men with tape worms in their ass about the best low carb pasta options.)

another confirmation that they’re fucking, and fucking nasty. “I’m letting him set the pace, and I’m just trying to keep up,” is a fantastic precursor to the “God I hope so.” Tommy Kinard— your jokes about keeping up with a younger man are truly unmatched. (EDIT: Yes, I know the line wasn’t inherently about sex, you dorks, and that it can also be a reference to how Buck has seemingly sped run the “pre-dating” phase of his and Tommy’s relationship.)

more confirmation that Buck is into Tommy, and that he shows Tommy this, too.

Edit: I’m also torn about having a less than enthusiastic reaction to the scene because at this point, Tommy is like the Star Wars sequels. There are valid critiques of his characterization, his past, and how he’s been written, but because there is a large chunk of the fandom that cannot argue in good faith and has the most ass-backwards things to say about queer men, I spend more time defending the character from terrible takes than engaging with the source material the way I’d like to. I’d really like to just say what I think without having to fight through bad faith arguments.

[fireflylitsky]

:3c I couldn't pick so I had to narrow it down to three

AnFuu Jack of All trades (Undead Unluck)

Kai Fuwa - Fixing Overhaul (BNHA)

ZabuTema Abandon Reason

askldfjksadjh I am surprised by the selection?? Very well then :3

Okay Jack of All Trades is a medical kink one shot in which Andy casually divulges he has a PhD (because the man has been alive forever and apparently is good at everything) and offers to give Fuuko a checkup since she probably hasn't had one since before her Unluck ability developed. Fuuko is both mortified and tempted, as she's been concerned with one thing in particular regarding her sexual health for a while now...

Aaaaand snippet time (this one is very wip):

“Oh my god…” Fuuko hisses, face flashing red. “I have to go.”

“No, you don’t,” he calls her out with a laugh. “But hey, if all your stuff is in working order, then alright.”

Yeah. That was the problem. It wasn’t really—not all her stuff, anyway.

She looks at him with a moment of pause, chewing at her lip. “Y-Yeah. No, of course it is.”

Andy raises a brow. “You lyin’?”

“No!” 

“Yeah, you lyin’.” He sighs, leaning back in his chair. “So what’s the issue?”

“It’s… it’s nothing,” she denies, feeling the burn of her cheeks.

Andy’s face take on a wolfish sort of amusement. “That don’t look like nothin’, Fuuko.”

She huffs indignantly. “Nothing important, okay? All the necessary parts that keep me alive are working just fine and that’s what matters.”

“C’mon,” he chuffs. “All of you matters.”

“Andy…”

“Just tell me.”

“Do you promise not to laugh?”

“Sure.”

“I mean it, Andy.”

“Hey, that makes two of us. You stallin’ for time or what, sweetheart?”

“I… God… I don’t even know how to say this…”

“You got some sorta bowel movement problem or somethin’? IBS?”

“What? No. No, it’s nothing like that. I… this is stupid—I don’t know that it’s even worth mentioning. I doubt you could even do anything about it.”

“Whoa now, pretty hasty in doubtin’ me like that. Keep it up and I’ll get all offended.”

“Well unless you’re a gynecologist, it shouldn’t be all that offensive I’ll have you know!” she blurts, hands fisted at her side and mouth snapping into a tight light, a hot breath puffing from her nostrils.

Well, beans. That just kinda slipped out now, didn’t it?

She expects some snappy zinger back. Like ‘Oh ho, I know the female body intimately’, but instead his mouth pulls into a frown.

“You alright?” he asks, brows pulling together with concern.

“I–yeah…” she mumbles, staring at the floor which is much easier than Andy’s scrutinizing face. 

“Hey." There isn't an ounce of humor or judgment in his voice. “You should tell me what’s goin’ on, I do know some stuff—no bullshit or funny business. I might be able to help.”

“Andy…” she mutters, tipping her eyes up reluctantly. 

“Look, ya don’t gotta be embarrassed,” he assures. “Whatever’s botherin’ ya, well that means it’s botherin’ me too. We could use one of Nico’s labs. Easy. Make it real legit, put you in a gown and all that good stuff.”

“I don’t know, Andy…” she whines. He’s so… comforting? He makes it so darn hard to tell him no. Does she even really want to tell him no? “I mean it, i-it’s really not important. Not in the grand scheme of things.”

His brows angle sternly and he leans in and down, almost even with her height. “I mean it too. Quit tellin’ me you're not important before I do somethin’ stupid.”

“Wh-wha? Like what?”

“Haven’t decided yet,” he hums. Somehow it sounds like a threat coming from him. She doesn’t want to find out to be honest. Surely it’d be embarrassing for her, whatever he decides.

“Okay, fine!” Fuuko caves, throwing her arms up in  exasperation. “I can’t…” she swallows thickly, the words don’t come out. “Look, I-I can’t say. Will you just… I don’t know…. maybe if I just had a regular exam you’d figure out what’s wrong with me?”

“Sure,” he agrees easily. “Ain’t nothin’ 'wrong with you', but sure, Fuuko. Whatever gets ya there.”

Gods, if he only knew how on the nose that is… Nothing is getting her there. That’s the problem. She can’t freaking orgasm. Never has, and odds are looking slim at this point that she ever will. She hears it’s lovely though.

As for the Zabu/Tema fic, that's an enemies to lovers pairing set in an AU where Zabuza and Haku live. Temari (an adult at this point) is investigating a series of disappearances when she comes across this asshole, Zabuza, also investigating the same thing. (Haku and Kimimaro, who he's raised, are both among the missing.) They agree to set aside their differences and work together to infiltrate this complex trafficking operation. It focuses much more on an undercover scenario than fighting.

Snip snappet:

When Zabuza finally passes through the beaded curtain doorway, Temari makes it a point to keep her breath even. Not a sigh of relief in sight, despite the tension shedding away from her shoulders. It took him long enough.

She’s doing her thing, trailing fingers down some guy’s arm so he can feel important as she smiles and finishes delivering his drink. The man thanks her with a yellowed grin and beady eyes that linger on her chest. He’s like all the rest here.

Just as she does any other night, Temari bows–smiles without teeth, appreciative and demure–and pulls back to survey the room for anyone else in need of assistance.

She locks eyes with Zabuza from across the busy, smoke-filled expanse, and a silent acknowledgement passes between them–the plan is in motion and they both have their parts to play. Fucking up in not an option, not when they’ve come this far.

The bristle of nerves Temari feels is annoying at best and she quickly tamps them down. Putting on this act in front of him is no different than anyone else. Just part of the job.

Leaning back in a plush, red velvet chair, Zabuza has his legs splayed like he owns the place. That’s perfect, because the man he’s impersonating basically does. His eyes are on her and he lazily lifts a hand, elbow still leaning on the arm of the chair, two fingers gesturing for her to bring him a drink. 

A weight on Temari’s shoulder draws her attention from Zabuza and to the familiar and unpleasant face of her ‘boss’, Sato, behind her. “That man is very important,” he murmurs, his fingers curling and digging into her clavicle. “You’ll be a good girl and take good care of him.”

Barf.

“Of course, sir.” She smiles so sweetly he can’t even tell she’s choking back bile. Moving to walk away, she finds herself halted, his hand catching her by the jaw, squishing her cheeks to pull her in close.

“When I say good, I mean very good. I mean you’ll give him anything he wants, understand, sweetheart?” he asks, the stench of his breath now in her nose and it is distinctly unforgivable. Luckily for her, the silly contortion of whatever he’s doing to her face hides her disgust. 

So silver linings, or something.

She tries to answer, “yes sir,” but finds nodding to be nominally easier, so she ends up sticking with that.

He smiles, loosening his grip and patting her cheek like maybe he thinks she’s a dog–a good one–and she half-expects him to fish a treat from his pocket and chuck it at her face. 

Instead Sato pushes a highball glass filled with premium whiskey into her hands–neat. “Take this to him.”

Again, she agrees with practiced submission and he eats it right up.

Good boy, she thinks. Despite the nasty little cretin he is, everything is going perfectly, so she can’t complain too much.

She takes the glass and feels those nerves again. They’re bubbling in her gut and they almost come out as some sort of psycho laughter. It’s difficult not to smile when she returns her gaze to Zabuza—some giddiness at their batshit plan actually working so far—but his is pitched sternly and unwavering. 

It straightens her out immediately. It’s almost intimidating, the way he’s looking at her, and she can’t help but feel like he’s playing his part a little too well.

That’s fine, she decides, because she will too.

With one whiskey in hand, she weaves her way across the room, hips swiveling and shoes clacking against bamboo floors. Her and Zabuza don’t break their stare and she notices every time it appraises her up and down.

"Sir?" she greets on her approach. “I hope this is to your liking.” Just as she’s trained, she leans in, allowing him a nice view as she touches his arm with a friendly caress.

He’s just like anyone else, she reminds herself.

Zabuza takes the drink without a word and looks at the hand she’s laid on him, then back to her face. After a long pause, he takes a sip. Temari is waiting for him to pull her onto his lap like they planned so she can discreetly go over important details with him, but of course, he is busy being an ass.

“Sir?” she prods sweetly through gritted teeth.

He takes another sip and a deep breath through his nose. “Fine,” he says on the exhale before reaching out, his hand finding the small of her back and pulling her onto his lap. He’s not exactly gentle and she stumbles into straddling him. 

There’s a flicker of a glare from her. It’s not enough to be noticed by anyone else, but it’s enough to put a smirk on his stupid face.

“You’re late.” She’s annoyed and wants an explanation, but her words don’t match the rest of her. She’s looking up at him from beneath thick lashes, blinking patiently in waiting and steadying herself against him with hands splayed and sweeping across his broad chest.

Zabuza examines her keenly. She isn’t used to being this close to him and she certainly isn’t used to him without his face wrappings. Her nerves flare once more and she hopes they don’t show. 

The corner of Zabuza’s mouth quirks up the slightest bit as he leans in slowly, nosing into her hair. “This little act of yours has gotten pretty convincing, Kuniochi,” Zabuza murmurs, mouth to her ear so no one can read his lips.

“It’s always been this convincing,” Temari counters, allowing her hips to settle just a little lower onto his. It never leaves her mind that she has eyes on her, and every move she makes must be perfect. “You just haven’t seen it before. Doesn’t bother you, does it?”

“Do I look bothered to you?” He pulls back just enough to be met with his gaze and she studies it coolly. It’s as cold and hard as his blade and his mouth pressed into a tight line—a feature she doesn’t often see, so she lingers there a moment longer.“You look as you always do,” she finally answers, tapping her index thoughtfully against his lips before allowing that fingertip to trail down to his chin and rest in the small dimple there, “so yes.”

[art-missy]

You were often called doubtful. But you preferred the word 'prudent' to qualify yourself. Always thinking of many possibilities and outcomes, scenarios and strategies. Always analyzing, or over-analyzing. It could be a situation or just people, your mind would always scrutinize.

You were trusted as a strategist in the protocol. Figuring out enemies' plans with just their first movements. You were better at analyzing situations than people out of the field. And it was one of the reasons why you could not figure Tejo out.

He was too staight to the point.

So straightforward it often felt like a trap.

So when one morning, he casually sat at your table in the headquarters' canteen for breakfast, you braced yourself for whatever words would come out of his mouth. He just stared at you for a moment and you stared back.

"Your lack of trust in me is almost offensive," he finally said, leaning against his back rest. "I remember making myself clear : I'm attracted to you and I want to try something. However, you didn't give me an answer."

As usual, way too straightforward.

The truth was that you also were attracted to him. But his directness always freezed you. You were used to people hiding their motives. You were used to people being that direct when they pretended to be. Yet, everything in his actions and body language hinted that he was sincere. Which you couldn't fathom.

"Did I do something to you to deserve such wariness ?"

You looked at him, raising an eyebrow.

"I can't see your eyes well," you scoffed with light humor. "Might be because of the Top Gun-ish sunglasses."

The light snort escaping him startled you slightly. He then took off his glasses and set them on the table right between you. His gaze quickly found yours.

"Better ?" he asked.

It was.

You could look into his eyes better and yet, they did not help you at all. His very brown eyes were calm and focused, unlike your mind at the moment. He wasn't hiding anything, and it confused you. He was laying bare to you and it didn't seem to be a problem to him.

"What else ?" he inquired while stealing you a toast.

Your eyes narrowed but he easily supported your gaze.

"I don't know if I can trust a man with a v-neck that plunging," you hummed, taking a sip of juice as an amused smirk tainted his lips. "What does even attract you ?"

"Would you consider going on a date with me if I give you an answer ?"

You shrugged, not saying anything but it seemed like a good enough response for Tejo.

"At first it was your talent for finding the perfect strategy. There is something perfectly intriguing about your ability to adapt to a situation on the field and to lead your teammates to defeat your adversaries," he said simply, his eyes still anchored in yours. "Then it was your calm but fierce temper. Always with a harsh but clever come back on your tongue and the strength to back up your words. And finally, the ferocious grace with which you hold yourself. It is no secret that I love your eyes glaring at me."

You looked at him with a raised eyebrow, an almost resigned sigh escaping you. How could he say things like that without sounding or acting desperate ? Straight to the point as ever, which made him even more oddly attractive in your eyes.

"If I indulge you..." you started and rolled your eyes when you saw his smirk widening. "If I indulge you, what will you do once once you'll get bored ?"

Tejo clicked his tongue and shook his head in disapproval.

"Getting bored of you ?" his eyes squinted and he leaned slightly toward you. For an instant, the table between you felt insignificant. "I'm very doubtful it will happen."

"Only the future will tell us, I suppose," you shrugged.

Brimstone suddenly burst in the canteen, calling agents —yourself included for an emergency mission.

"Duty calls," you stood up and stretched your arms above your head.

He watched you, his eyes so focused on you.

"Of course," he nodded. "I'll wait for you."

[nickeverdeen]

Hi can I have some character match ups please?

I just want to also say, your writing is so good! You're definitely one of my faves 💞

Please can I have: TUA, MCU, Star Wars.

I have dark brown hair and light brown eyes.

My favourite colour is blue, I don't like the colour orange.

I am smart, academic, very sporty, wears glasses and sometimes contacts.

I love sports (especially martial arts and football) which is my fave thing to do in my spare time. I love eating absolutely anything, I love watching lots of TV series, especially crime and documentaries.

I don't like spiders lol.

Can I have a male match ups for each of them?

And they can include any romance.

My pronouns are She/her

Thank you so much 😄

Your TUA match is…

Diego Hargreeves

Diego would absolutely love your passion for martial arts and sports

He’d invite you to spar or go on long training sessions together, playfully turning everything into a friendly competition

Although you’re clearly capable, Diego can’t help but be protective

He’d insist on being the one to get rid of any spiders that show up and would act like he’s saving the day each time

Your love for crime series would be right up his alley

You’d spend hours watching and analyzing episodes, trying to solve cases before the show does, with Diego getting way too competitive about it

Diego would admire your intelligence, often coming to you for advice or perspective on things he can’t figure out

He’d appreciate how you balance both brains and athleticism

Though he can be rough around the edges, Diego would surprise you with well-thought-out date ideas, like a night out to your favorite food spots, proving he’s secretly sentimental

If you’re wearing glasses, Diego would often tease you by trying them on and making goofy faces or jokes, just to see you laugh

Both of you have a fiery spirit, which would lead to little competitions like who can do more push-ups or who can throw a knife more accurately

He’d never let you win just because he’s sweet on you

Diego would love how sporty and energetic you are

You’d both spend weekends doing anything active, from jogging through the city to practicing fighting techniques together

Despite his tough exterior, Diego would open up to you about his own insecurities and traumas, finding comfort in your intellectual, thoughtful nature

Your MCU match is…

Peter Parker 1

Peter would love your interest in sports

He’d happily join you for casual football games or hit the gym together, even if he jokes that you’d probably be the one carrying the team

Peter would totally vibe with your academic side

You’d study together or have nerdy conversations where he could show off a bit, asking for help or bouncing ideas around

Knowing you love food, he’d take you to his favorite hole-in-the-wall food joints around the city

Peter would be thrilled to watch crime shows and documentaries with you

He’d love discussing the cases, and you’d both turn it into a game of who can predict the twist first

Though he is Spider-Man, Peter would handle any real-life spiders that pop up, making it a funny, ironic ritual every time he “saves” you from one

You’d love his sharp humor and quick wit, and he’d adore your sarcasm right back

Peter would keep you laughing with endless quips and funny impressions of villains he’s fought

He’d be fascinated by your mix of brains and athleticism, totally impressed by your dedication to both

He’d come to your games whenever he could, cheering the loudest

On a budget but thoughtful, Peter would often plan DIY dates, like movie marathons with your favorite crime shows, homemade pizza nights, or stargazing from a rooftop

While he’s high-energy and occasionally a bit chaotic, your grounded and slightly reserved nature would give him someone to lean on and keep him balanced

Peter would always be down to learn more about things you’re passionate about, whether it’s sports or random crime trivia

Your Star Wars match is…

Poe Dameron

Poe would love your energy and athleticism

He’d constantly be suggesting adventure dates, like hiking, exploring the galaxy together, or just challenging you to little sparring matches

Knowing you’re into sports and martial arts, he’d insist on showing you around a ship or even letting you co-pilot—teaching you a few maneuvers and letting you take the wheel

Poe would absolutely take charge when it comes to things like spiders

When not flying, Poe would love settling in to watch crime shows and documentaries with you, surprised by how interesting he finds them

You’d both joke about which characters remind you of First Order villains

Poe loves that you’re a fellow food enthusiast

Every time he returns from a mission, he’d bring back some local delicacies for you both to try

This would become your “welcome home” tradition

He’d find little ways to incorporate blue into his wardrobe to match your favorite color and would often compliment how it suits you, subtly flirting by making you feel special

Poe would love that you’re into martial arts, always asking you to “show him some moves.”

He’d love that you can keep up with his active lifestyle, even playfully challenging you to spar

Poe would appreciate that you’re strong but also a bit introverted

His confidence and charm would help you feel comfortable, and he’d always be subtly encouraging you to open up

Although he’s tough, Poe has a soft side just for you

He’d surprise you with little gifts or take you on spontaneous trips, always trying to see you smile in those moments

Poe loves your smarts and would often ask you to explain things to him or share random trivia

[astrxlfinale]

"It seems a little ..." Oh she's looking for a good way to say this, really, but upon comparing weapons to Caelus it grows gradually harder to force back down that tender laugh of hers, polearm up against bat in comparison; " ... corny to use a bat to fight monsters, it's like that game of whack-a-mole ! Do you like Bop them ?"

Guinaifen knows his strength, at least portions of it as there have been tales of his feats and what might he has shown in fights that's gone way over her head. But, she has to admit, the thought of him going after big, scary monsters with a bat is a humoring image. Does the marastruck fear the mighty bat? Maybe. In terms of bopping monsters, however, she really didn't have anything to say. It wasn't as if she had developed a rather offensive and striking style. She smacked the monsters that wanted to take a bite out of her, and if found in a pinch she's throw some stashed away firecrackers at them.

"How do you use it?" She'd ask curiously, allowing her own weapon to vanish from her hand. In return hands would reunite on her back, leaning over to inspect it. Not one to play around with bats, Guinaifen had never even held one.

Gazing up at Caelus from her hunched over lean, a cheeky smile appeared; " ~ cooooould you teach me how to hold a bat ? I've never held one ! I think I'd look pretty awesome with one, don't you think?"

"A little what?"

Did she know that the bat listens to such conversations? Wholly allowing its emotional well being to hinge upon these very words? The fact alone they can find themselves falling into a casual line of conversation, fresh amidst the rotting leaves and the golden haze of Abundance's end, things were going pretty damn well.

Even the Mara struck need a hilarious or inconceivable sight for their final hour.

Caelus's features were quirked into a sense of amusement, a touch leaned in, drinking in the way her features perked into a measure of thought. This in itself was so beautifully endearing, the mere need to sigh wistfully at how damn cute she could be barely resisted! With how easy it was to distract or alter the floor of her conversation, appearances have to be kept!

Corny.

....

Ah, so the advent of emotional damage was inevitable for his dear weapon. If the curio could move in response (like it does in Penacony), it would've shrunk back due to the sting behind such words!

"First off." He mentions, giving an abrupt point and loving prod to the warmth of her cheek. "It'll remember that. The art of bopping as you aptly put it has been a try and true method since the caveman days!" Whether the Trailblazer is aware of what he's insinuating about himself is up in the air. Simply embracing this curiosity of her's was a journey worth diving into, as part of him gets it, life gains a particular set of shades upon the Xianzhou.

Underneath the sanctity of The Hunt, of the glory of the Cloud Knights and no shortage of martial artists, there had to be a form of wonder for the success of an art contently wading through the undisciplined channel. Weaponry, their usage and even the philosophies behind each one held their measure of enrichment here, similar to the perceived grounds of where they were veritable extensions of not only the body, but the mind to the skill. Stances, poise, dignity, and the sheer realm of execution involving multiple styles and unique variations either to mindset or bodily constitution, there was a wellspring of time devoted to it.

Jing Yuan's protegee was living proof of that. The art of drawing blades into a divine state of mentally harnessed and wielded promoted that as truth, and in kind, a lethal flash of inspiration for others to reach that point.

Aligning the bat with the lean in of her figure comes as second nature, allowing the ornate design and paths to be unveiled upon it, hints of steam freshly spilling from it's grooves as a lax grip carries it along. "As simple as it looks, catch your target before your eyes or senses, then proceed to lash it as the best kinda skull cracker. It's a lil different than using it for the sport it's based on." Did that even make sense? He'd have to contemplate that later, for that sight of her immersed in the touch of his renewed history had him.. well.. Touched.

He'd have to really run the humble beginnings of his awakening to fighting a Doomsday Beast to her sometime.

The bigger priority holds in that question as he makes a motion for her hand, to prompt her to perk up and offer those elegantly long limbs for the upcoming example. Grasp the bat, seize a hold as if it was the influence of carnage such a blunt instrument it truly was.

....

Maybe that inner sanctum of Destruction that flows with him needs to calm down.

All the same? Once his hand and Guinaifen's are situated on the curio, he doesn't hesitate to lean close, body to body, both of their hands holding the weapon skyward as his hand cups tenderly over her's. It allows for their grip to become firm. "Now if you want to be cool with it, this centers on applying a little bit of yourself, your force to the swing. Especially with my lil number. Say if we did it like this."

For an instant would that flow of Destruction vibrantly transmit from his palm, ignited from that spark as it'd wash over the stalwart nature of her own hand, harmless in nature to someone so beloved to Caelus. It'd assist itself as a bolstering factor, allowing for the weapon they wield to soak in the thriving potential of Path power. Within moments that once obsidian foundation hums with life, causing the bat to shiver as it gradually sparks with the illumination of his power. A cerulean sheen washes over pridefully across its expanse, allowing that 'bopper' to become both an extension of will and the bane of countless foes.

"Channel your frustrations, your aim, your strength and treat 'em like a watermelon on the beach." The imagery was clear and to the point. The martial finesse that dignified violence was void, for this was a simple and to the point measure, treating their foes to the brutality of nature itself. For many, it calls to a primal part of the soul.

....

Remembering how all of this even started, a lively, base rich chuckle followed from him as they leaned shoulder to cheek.

"Wasn't this corny to you at the start? Or do you plan on making a new definition come to be when it's in your hands?"

If Caelus were to be honest with himself? Picturing her in a similar position, with wild, determined eyes and allowing this Curio to sing the very force of her flames into this lethal model, there was a measure of attraction that made that heart of his shudder and beat with joy. She'd look like the prime definition of badass.

@avaere

[cryptwrites]

After a long stretch of bad dates and lukewarm matches, you decide to download Hearts & Haunts, a dating app you've never heard of but that came highly recommended online.

At first, things seem normal. Sure, some profiles have quirky descriptions ("must enjoy full moons" or "not looking for blood ties"), but everyone's got a weird sense of humor these days. So you start swiping, and soon you’ve got a date lined up. Oddly enough, when you arrive, your date—a very charming individual who seems to be more shadow than person—looks shocked that you're not at all disturbed by their, well, "shadowy presence."

You shrug it off, chalking it up to them being nervous. But the trend continues—every date you go on, from the elegant person with fangs to the mysterious figure who never removes their hood, can't seem to believe you’re not put off by their very obvious non-human features. Instead, you just play along, trying to be polite and maybe even a little charmed by the mystery.

But this time, on your latest date, you’re faced with someone who just won’t believe you’re serious. With piercing eyes and a smile just a bit too wide, they lean in close and ask, “Alright, really. What’s your angle, human? Is this some kind of joke, or are you actually not afraid?”

You feel a chill run down your spine at the way they emphasize human, but you swallow and offer a casual smile.

“No joke. I’m really not afraid.” You shrug, hoping you sound more confident than you feel.

Your date tilts their head, eyes narrowing as they scrutinize you. “So you’re telling me that you don’t find…this...unsettling?” And with that, they let their smile spread wider than seems possible, revealing not two, but rows upon rows of needle-like teeth.

You flinch, but it’s more out of surprise than fear. You’ve learned by now that dates from Hearts & Haunts have a knack for the strange and unusual, and you’re kind of impressed by their dedication to the bit. You lean forward, meeting their gaze head-on, “It’s a…unique look.” You try not to grimace. “You pull it off well.”

For the first time, you see something other than skepticism on their face—a flicker of genuine surprise. Then, a low chuckle rumbles in their chest. “Alright, you’ve got guts,” they say, leaning back in their chair. “Either that, or you’re completely clueless.” Their fingers tap against the table, sharp nails clicking like tiny claws. “So, tell me…why did you sign up for a dating app specifically for non-humans?”

You blink, completely thrown. “Wait—specifically for non-humans?”

They arch an eyebrow, folding their arms across their chest with a smirk. “You didn’t know? You’re the first human on this app. We all thought you were a thrill-seeker or something.”

The realization hits you like a punch. All those peculiar profiles—the “blood ties,” the “shape-shifting preferences,” the insistence on candlelit dinners in old ruins—it all makes sense now. Dumbass.

But strangely, as you sit there under your date’s amused and slightly predatory gaze, you don’t feel the urge to run. Instead, you feel…curious. Maybe a little excited.

“Well,” you say, “if it’s good enough for vampires and werewolves, then I must be in the right place.”

Your date's laughter rings out, low and rich, drawing a few curious glances from nearby tables. They lean closer, a glint of mischief in their eyes. "Careful what you wish for, human," they purr. "This world of ours has... unspoken rules. And let’s just say not everyone is as, uh, 'human-friendly' as me."

You shrug, still feeling the thrill of the mystery you’ve accidentally stumbled into. "Look, I just wanted something different," you reply. "And so far, you all have certainly delivered."

They shake their head, chuckling. "You’re serious, aren’t you?" A strange gleam lights their gaze, somewhere between fascination and hunger. "Tell me, what do you even know about our kind? Or is this just a dating experiment to you?"

You take a deep breath, holding their gaze. "I know enough. I get that there’s a whole other world here, and I may not understand it all yet, but... maybe I want to." You hesitate, then add with a grin, "Besides, if you're on this app, maybe you're looking for something different, too?"

They consider you in silence for a long moment, like a wolf sizing up its next meal. Then, with a sigh that feels like the start of a story, they lean back, draping one arm along the back of their chair. "Alright, human. Let’s see just how far you’re willing to dive into the unknown."

Your heart pounds, but you nod, feeling the weight of their words settle over you like a pact. You’re about to get exactly what you asked for: a plunge into a world that, only moments ago, you didn’t even know existed.

They give you a look—half amused, half intrigued—as if deciding what exactly to reveal. Finally, they drum their fingers on the table, the pointed nails clicking in a steady rhythm that makes your pulse quicken.

"Alright," they say, voice smooth as silk but with an edge that makes the hairs on your arms rise. "Let's start with a basic question. Do you actually know what I am?"

You hesitate, taking them in—the subtly too-wide smile, the fingers that end in claws, the shadows that seem to cling to them like a second skin. You’ve read about creatures like this, sure, but you can’t shake the feeling that asking them outright might not go well.

"Well," you say slowly, leaning back with a casual smile, "I'm guessing you’re not just someone who enjoys Halloween year-round?"

They laugh, a deep, resonant sound that fills the small, dimly-lit corner of the café. "Good guess, human. But I don’t think you understand what you’re dealing with." Their gaze intensifies, those eerie eyes locking with yours as they lean forward. "I am one of the Old Ones—the beings who roamed this world long before humans had words for fear. I have seen empires fall, mountains crumble, stars die."

The words hang heavy in the air, and for the first time, a chill seeps through your bravado. But you manage to keep your expression calm, leaning in as though they’ve just shared some juicy gossip. "So...you're basically a walking history book, then?" you tease, offering a wry smile.

They narrow their eyes, but there’s a flicker of amusement in them. "You're...refreshingly different," they admit, sounding almost reluctant. "Most humans would be halfway out the door by now, but here you are, grinning like this is some kind of… thrill."

You shrug, feigning nonchalance despite the rapid drumming of your heart. "You’ve got to admit, you’re all kind of fascinating. I mean, the stories alone—who wouldn’t be curious?"

The creature’s gaze softens, almost imperceptibly. For a moment, you think you see a flicker of something beyond hunger or amusement—a hint of loneliness, perhaps, or a tiredness that no amount of years can shake.

"Curiosity can be dangerous, you know," they murmur, their voice almost gentle. "We’re not made to be understood. Humans were meant to fear us, to keep their distance. And yet… here you are, sitting across from me, looking like you’d rather keep talking than run."

You glance down, taking in the way their fingers are still tapping against the table, claws leaving tiny scratches on the wood. “Maybe that’s because I don’t see you as some monster,” you say quietly. “Maybe I just see someone who’s… a little different. And maybe a little lonely, too.”

Their gaze sharpens, and for a split second, the mask slips. They look… human. Vulnerable. And then, just as quickly, it’s gone, replaced by that predatory gleam. “You’re playing a dangerous game, human.”

You smile, feeling more daring than you should. “So I’ve been told.”

They shake their head, something between exasperation and respect flickering in their eyes. "Alright," they say, voice soft but laced with challenge. "If you’re really willing to dive into this world, there’s a party tomorrow night. A gathering of sorts."

Your heart skips a beat, but you manage to keep your cool. "A party, huh? Is that your way of saying you’re inviting me as your date?”

They snort, but there’s a glimmer of warmth in their gaze. “Maybe. But be warned, if you come, you might just find yourself face-to-face with creatures far less charmed by you than I am.”

You consider the challenge, your pulse racing with a strange blend of excitement and terror. “So… what do I wear to a gathering of supernatural beings?”

They smile, showing just a hint of those unsettling rows of teeth. “Something dark. And maybe something you don’t mind getting a little... stained.”

“Bloodstains, right?”

“Perhaps,” they say, looking far too pleased. "Do you think you can handle it?"

You look them straight in the eye, the adrenaline coursing through you like fire. "I guess we'll find out."

You, a normal human, try out a dating app you've never heard of and soon find out it's a dating app for supernatural entities. Every date you go on, your date is always surprised you're not repulsed by their non-human features. But your latest date just can't believe you're not joking…

[obae-me]

I have a suggestion! Simeon and Diavolo talk about Lucifer and how his personality has changed over the millenia.

That’s a cute idea! We don’t see Diavolo and Simeon just on their own much! Let’s go for it! 

_______________

“Have a seat.” Diavolo gestured, waving his hand over the little table Barbatos had set up for them for their casual meeting. Two cups of tea specifically chosen by the butler, some freshly baked sweets and handmade sandwiches. Not usually normal necessities for a meeting, but nothing was ever less than perfect when regards to Barbatos and the Prince. 

With a simple thank you, Simeon bowed his head and seated himself in the empty spot across from Diavolo. Amazing how times had changed. If you would’ve asked the angel eons ago if he could’ve imagined himself sitting and having tea with the enemy, he would’ve assumed it was a joke. Now he could just smile and consider Diavolo a friend. “I appreciate you making time for me to talk.” 

“Of course,” Diavolo beamed, but then his smile waned just a bit. “I hope there are no concerns about the program.” 

Simeon gently shook his head, his brown curls bouncing in front of his eyes. “Nothing of the sort,” he assured. Before he went on to explain why he did want to meet, he picked up his tea cup and took a sip. Delicious as always. Somehow Barbatos knew precisely what he liked. The teacup left his lips and settled into it’s saucer with a soft clink. “Actually, I want to first start off with an apology.” 

Surprised, Diavolo raised an eyebrow. “Why, whatever for?” 

The angel took a deep breath in through the nose and out through the mouth. While his mouth remained a mellow smile, his eyebrows lifted in guilt. “I wanted to apologize for not thanking you sooner and for harboring some reservations towards you and yours.” 

“I see.” Diavolo folded his arms but kept his gaze trained onto the angel. However there was no disappointment or hostility coming from him. “I would honestly be a bit more nervous if you had no skepticism at all. The wounds of war don’t fade. But I have the sense you mean more than just the war.” He was right. The wisdom of the prince was not to be doubted. All Simeon needed was to nod once more for Diavolo to figure him out. “This is about Lucifer, isn’t it?” 

“Correct on both accounts.” Simeon leaned back in his seat and crossed his legs, his hands settling over his lap. “While I am considered under Michael’s order, I did volunteer to attend. I had concerns. The Lucifer I used to know and the Lucifer that I’ve gotten to know are very different people.” 

“And you believed I had a hand in that?” 

Simeon’s gaze wandered a bit across the table before meeting the prince’s again. “Yes.” While not wanting to jump to conclusions, when you’ve been raised in a certain ideology, it’s hard to ignore. He didn’t want to believe that Lucifer was unhappy, changed against his own will, which is why he came down to ascertain the situation himself. “Although I know now that I was blinded by my own personal biases,” he stated honestly, thinking over old memories with a look to the starry Devildom sky. “I used to remember him to be a bit more careful and curious. So when confronted by this stern sarcastic personality, I was--like I mentioned--concerned, and for that I apologize. Yes, he has changed, but it is clear to me now that he has simply grown. He speaks his mind for now because he is free too and doesn’t have to fear for it. He finds his own dark humor in his sarcasm. And he perhaps simply isn’t as curious anymore because while being here he has learned so much. So for that, I thank you...and I thank you for caring for him and watching over him where we could not.” 

While clever, the prince did seem a bit shocked to hear such grateful words so suddenly. He quickly glowed with pride. “He has turned into quite the amazing demon, hasn’t he?” 

Simeon chuckled. “Precisely.” Despite the Demon of Pride’s scowling and seriousness, Simeon knows that underneath it all, down here he is truly happy. “I’m glad to get the chance to know him all over again.” 

[sondepoch]

HC: MC is more flexible than them!

Perfection is certain. Perfection is solid. Perfection is the body of a demon or an angel, where there is no room (or need) for bones to crack and muscles to stretch. You and Solomon, though? You’re human. Not so “perfect” when compared to the other inhabitants of at RAD—but that just makes it all the more interesting when they finally see the way the human body can crack and bend

Word Count: 5.5k

SFW + mild descriptions of cracking body parts

Characters: All brothers + All Undateables + Luke

MASTERLIST

Lucifer

Instant panic mode

Man just learned that it’s possible for humans to break bones, so when he hears you casually crack your knuckles, he instantly assumes that all your fingers are broken

Finds it even more terrifying when you lean your head back and crack your neck 

Honestly, the look of sheer horror on his face would be terrifying if you didn’t find it so funny

Is actually super confused when he realizes that you’re 100% fine but will not lower himself to actually asking you about it. That is not the Lucifer way, and so this man instead decides to secretly binge Satan’s collection of human anatomy instead

But uh, he gets scarily into it

Seriously, you’re starting to get concerned when it’s been nearly two full weeks of Lucifer ignoring you to bury his nose in a book, eyebrows furrowing every goddamn time he finishes one, and still has no clue what that cracking sound is 

It’s only when you casually do it at the dinner table and Asmo cringes, complaining about how weird it is that humans get pockets of gas inside certain joints and they actually have to crack it out, to which all his brothers nod their head and cringe when you do it again, that he understands what it is

Has never been more relieved

He isn’t as disturbed by the sound as he was before, so it’s not as fun to tease him with it - but you can count on the fact that if you ever crack anything in his presence, he will pause whatever he’s doing to study you for a moment and make sure your face isn’t contorted in pain or anything

After all, he needs to be completely certain that you haven’t broken a bone

But someone help this man when he realizes how much more flexible humans are compared to demons

The first time you do a backbend in front of him, he actually flinches

Man can’t help but imagine himself in those poses - and no matter how sexy you look when you’re winking at him and stretching your body like it’s glue, his bones would have to be shattered to bits for him to do the same

Quietly asks you not to stretch yourself into such positions in his presence

On the bright side, you can shut him up in the middle of any lecture by “casually” stretching your arms back until the demon is so disturbed that he stops in the middle of his sentence and asks you to leave as soon as possible

All in all, not a big fan - but he can tolerate your antics (if only to save face)

But if you ever show him videos (or even pictures) of a contortionist, he may actually be scarred for the rest of his almost-eternal life

Mammon

Man really needs to learn how to knock

He barges into your room without warning, as usual, only to see you all but straddling the ground, legs spread wide apart as you lean to one side and touch your right toe

It’s the most basic human stretch there is - but it’s terrifying to Mammon

You don’t even get the chance to say hi to him before he’s lifted you onto your feet, pulling you up from under your arms, desperately asking why you weren’t screaming for help 

Cannot process the fact that you were actually in that position willingly, much less the notion that it felt remotely good

Of course, you respond to his obvious aversion by showing him all the other ways your body can bend, flopping onto your bed and bending your body into a perfect bridge position

Mammon’s screeches when he sees the arch your back makes

It lowkey gives him nightmares the next night

Also becomes very touchy after he sees you move your body around so comfortably

In his eyes, you’re now the equivalent of a giant teddy bear - and really, what are the differences, now? He uses you for cuddles and hugs, can seemingly bend your body in any way and you’ll bounce back, and your skin is so soft compared to the hardness of his own body

Man actually grows used to your body after a while, holding a strange fascination for the way you can move

Begins to think that it’s cool when you show him how you can crack your knuckles and such

Absolutely makes use of the fact that some of his other brothers hate the sound, casually walking up to them with you by his side and asking them (while you crack your knuckles) to forgive his debts

Works 90% of the time

The 10% when it doesn’t work, though, he gets into trouble

In his free time, though, he actually likes lying with you and trying to figure what other body parts you can crack

Courtesy of Mammon, you learn that you can crack your hip if you stretch at a certain angle

(Bonus:) He one day tries to stretch his body the way you stretch yours and does a basic hamstring stretch on the ground, trying to touch his toes, but the exertion is too much for his inflexible body and he sort of locks a joint, so he’s left on the floor for nearly half an hour until you find him in his room and help him out of it

(Bonus bonus:) After his trauma from the above incident, he immediately goes back to assuming that you’re in great pain every time he sees you do a particularly difficult stretch and instantly lifts your body out of the position, no matter how you protest and say that you’re fine

Leviathan

"What a normie”

That’s the only reaction you get when you crack your knuckles in front of him, eager to see what he’ll do after realizing how much it disturbs his other brothers

Needless to say, you’re disappointed by his utter nonchalance

But that’s only because you have no clue what happens to Levi when he runs to his room and closes his door, jumping into his bathtub with a shook expression on his face

“Oh my god!” He squeals. “iT wAs LiKE iN tHe aNImES”

Nah, fr tho

Man has seen more than enough human-world shows which feature characters cracking their knuckles before getting down to work, so he’s pretty familiar with the concept

Like many things in anime, he was only 60% sure that it was real

But you actually did it

And it was in real life

Man is practically fanboying over a perfectly normal phenomenon

While you’re sitting in the living room, thinking that he was utterly unfazed by it :(

But when the two of you have a whole year to spend together under the same roof, it’s honestly inevitable that the truth comes out

“You like it?” You ask, pure confusion settling over your faces. After all, he’s the first of the brothers to not be utterly horrified by your little habit

“N-no!” Levi shouts, hiding his face. “I mean, maybe...just a little...sort of...but not in the normie way!”

Boi is too cute for his own good

Of course, you humor him and proceed to crack every single joint you can think of, sending a wink Levi’s way 

It would be so easy to tease him, wouldn’t it? To mess with him and call him strange, to compare to his brothers and remind him that you’re not an anime character - and that anime is, in fact, based on humans, so it shouldn’t have come as a surprise that humans could crack their knuckles the way he’s seen online

But, he’s too precious. And too cute. And he’s too adorable, staring at you with that utterly captivated expression, so you can’t help but humor him again, asking if he wants to see some of the other differences between humans and demons

And when you show him how you can bend your body, man is shook all over again

He 100% thought that the absurd stretches (like a split? how preposterous) were merely fabrications of animation - flourishes added in by animators to make the visuals more interesting

But seeing you move like that? And when you show him the other stuff?

Congratulations. Boi is officially convinced that humans are more interesting that anime can ever be.

Satan

One of the few demons who was already familiar with the fact that humans are ridiculously flexible and can crack nearly everything in their body 

He was actually the one to approach you about it

“Stretch for me, human.”

Or well, the same thing but in less blunt words

Actually invites you to have tea with him where he first broaches the subject, confirming that you'll be fully comfortable with everything he wants to study

Lmao man really arranges to have a safe word in case he pushes you too far

Once you’ve agreed to letting him study how the human body can bend and crack, the two of you set a time and meet up in his room (and yes, he does clear his books out of the way to make room for you)

And so the stretching begins

It actually feels quite awkward at first with Satan showing you pictures from human world yoga books and asking you to mimic them, taking notes in a book on everything 

Gets really excited when he realizes that your flexibility is a function of how often you stretch, and once he realizes that you’re able to go a little farther each day, he becomes lowkey obsessed with finding out whether there's a limit or not

Boi may or may not secretly try to stretch in his own room in case demons are just naturally less flexible and need to stretch regularly to become like humans

Also almost breaks his arm attempting that, so he never tries it again

The whole ordeal fits itself into your routine after long enough: after school, you go to Satan’s room and do yoga while he jots down notes on how your body moves, and after everything is done the two of you have tea

Satan never touches you while you’re stretching for fear that he’ll physically push you into something uncomfortable, but when you explain that certain positions are easier to hold if someone helps, he’ll definitely try to be a helping hand

He starts out really tentatively, hesitant that he’ll be too strong and will push you to the floor or something, but he’s pleasantly surprised to find that humans are more resilient than he’d initially thought

After his notebook is filled with notes and he’s suitably convinced that all his questions are sated, he’ll express his gratitude and tell you that you don’t need to continue 

But if you tell him that you’ve been enjoying your time together, man will 100% clear that space in his room permanently, so that you can spend time there together while Satan asks you calming questions about your day and you stretch the tension of the day out of your muscles

Asmodeus

Jelly boi

Nah but fr

Man couldn’t care less about your ability to crack your knuckles and neck - if anything, he finds the habit to be irritating

But boi is jealous when he sees how easily you can bend your body and stretch into positions that even he can’t

Obviously, his mind is in the gutter when he’s thinking about the way your body can bend - but he’s equally furious of the fact that human skin is so much softer than demon skin

Like, yes. Most demons have near-perfect skin because of its taut texture - and yes, that gives them the illusion of perfection

But human skin, blemished as it is, is like a teddy bear next to a rock when compared to demon skin

And obviously Asmo’s skin is softer than everyone else’s (this man is NOT skimping out when it comes to his skincare routine), but it infuriates him that his skin isn’t as soft as yours 

Of course, man bounces back quicker than anyone else (as expected)

He grows content with the texture of his own skin the moment he realizes how easily penetrable human skin is - namely when he’s doing homework with you and he sees your skin get sliced open by paper, of all things (man nearly chokes when he learns that this is a regular occurrence for humans)

But he never quite loses his fixation for the human body

It’s highkey the reason why he likes touching you so much - your skin is softer than some Devildom blankets! If he could fall asleep with your arms wrapped around him every night, he absolutely would

But he won’t genuinely request that of you unless you explicitly offer, so he’ll settle for simply hugging you at every opportunity

Ofc, the moment he grows content with the texture of his skin, he’s jealous of your flexibility all over again, so it’s kind of nuts

You eventually have to sit him down and tell him all the downfalls of being able to bend yourself into awkward positions (ex: getting stuck in said position or causing a cramp) for him to finally be content with his own body once more

The moment he’s back to normal, all the usual flirtatious jokes come back and he’s offering to let you show him the ways your body can bend

You deny instantly

But if he ever takes you to a club and has the opportunity to dance with you, do a body roll

Man will get on his knees if that’s what it takes to have you do it again

And then he’ll whisk you off to his room, stubbornly ignoring his brother’s protests, declaring that he needs to “reeducate” himself in the art of dance, and that you’re going to be his teacher

And hey - give him a private show while you’re at it ;)

Beelzebub

The first time you crack your knuckles in front of him, he’s eating

Man doesn’t really register it, just assumes that he bit something crunchy 

The second time you do it, it’s in his and Belphie’s room - and Belphie is taking a nap

Man gets a little suspicious, because the sound definitely came from your end, but he dismisses it and decides that the sound must have been a hitch in Belphie’s breathing

But the third time, the two of you are alone

And Beel’s protective instincts come rushing to the surface when he realizes that you really are the one making that sound

“Are you dying?”

First question, no matter what. Man has heard of medical conditions that cause bones to become brittle and crumbly, so he needs to know

Then again, he won’t really believe you when you tell him the truth

“You can...crack stuff at will?”

beelisconfuzzled.exe 

You have to show him methodically, portion by portion, which of your body parts you can crack

He isn’t disturbed by the sound (he’s eaten things which sound much worse, he can assure you) but man is intrigued

(”But how?” He’ll inevitably ask, struggling to yank his own knuckles off in an attempt to crack them and get that feeling of satisfaction you kept talking about)

All in all,he has a decent reaction - probably one of the only people who won’t overreact about the information

But then the fateful day comes

And he cracks your back

It happens while he’s giving you a big bear hug, proud of you after you came running to tell him about a good grade you got in Devildom Literature - and he places his palm on your back in just the right area, pressing down as he hugs you

And pop

Man is so mortified, he almost drops you

You, on the other hand, cannot be more pleased with this development

“Again! Again!” You shout, trying to get him to repeat the action - but while Beel loves hugging you, cracking your back is something he’s not willing to risk

“It’s okay when you do it, because you know how much your back can take” is his biggest argument. "But I don't."

And unfortunately, calling him a chicken won’t work when you try to convince him otherwise :(

What will work, however, is convincing Beel that this can be a sort of strength training - because he needs to have full control of his body to do it right

He’ll agree to do it once (mainly because you’ve been begging for so long)

But, obviously, “once” means as many times as you want, from there on out ;)

Belphegor

It’s one of the few times where Belphie isn’t in tune with his brother

And he hates it

He doesn’t understand how Beel isn't disturbed by the sound - every time you crack your knuckles, it sends a shudder straight down Belphie’s spine

And it’s not the ick factor taking place. It’s just that Belphie can’t help that his mind wanders to darker places whenever you do something like that, the sound abruptly reminding him of his time in the Celestial War and all the awful things he heard there

Like others, the sound reminds him of how weak you really are

And so, if you ever crack your knuckles around him, expect him to leave instantly

He’s the one brother who will never learn to tolerate it - not when he can remove himself from the situation so easily

And honestly, it’s kind of amazing how sharp his ears are

Is he taking a nap on your lap? If you think you can subtly crack anything without his eyes shooting open, you’re wrong

Is he preparing dinner with you in the kitchen? Nope, the sound of boiling water will not cover the sound of your body stretching too far, and Belphie will shoot you a glare before swiftly exiting the room

Is he simply doing homework with you in the RAD library? You’d think that the sound of chatter from the table next to you would hide the noise you make when you subtly lean back to crack your back, but Belphie is gathering his things mere seconds later, huffing and muttering under his breath

So yeah

Not a fan

On the other hand, he loves how accommodating your body is in terms of how flexibly you are

It brings him great joy, honestly, to just watch you flop your arms around aimlessly because humans’ movements are so fluid, so smooth, so unhindered by the rigid joints of demons

And, obviously, your flexibility makes for better naps

He likes to sleep next to you with his arms wrapped around your waist while you latch onto him in whatever position you deem comfortable

Without a doubt, the position you find is something that would be wholly impossible for a demon (how are you bending your legs that much?!) and it sometimes scares him to realize the full extents of your flexibility (can all humans twist their arms like that, or is it just you?) but he loves that you use your body’s oddities to pull him closer

And he’ll never deny you a comfortable nap if you’re willing to cuddle so readily

Never

Unless you crack your knuckles, that is

Solomon

Life is war and cracking body parts is your only weapon

Aka nonstop competitions between you and our resident wizard boy, both of you cracking body parts back and forth until one of you either fails or runs out of things to crack

Knuckles? Come on, are you even trying? Give him something less basic

Back? Oh yeah. Both sides, too - and the loud ones

Hips? You didn’t think it was possible, but Solomon will look you in the eye and hit one side of his hip, the movement a prelude to an instant CRACK which rings out oh-so-gloriously from the other end

Ribs? You realized you could crack them once and never stopped - you’re actually the one to teach Solomon how to do this

Neck? Always the finisher. So loud, and so satisfying

Neither the House of Lamentation nor Purgatory Hall ever wants to have the two of you over at the same time, because the residents know that you and Solomon will have these competitions. And they absolutely hate it.

So what do you do?

Go to the library and disturb the demons there, of course

It actually becomes a pretty sick form of payback to all the annoying demons that look down on the two of you for being humans, because they always cringe so hard when you guys do this

The two of you have deduced that the sound of knuckles cracking is the demon equivalent to the sound of nails on a chalkboard

And you fucking run wild with it

No one wants to piss either of you off, because you’ll both glare at the demon in question and proceed to crack every body part known to mankind (like seriously - it’s reached the point where you guys can crack your TOES, and if that isn’t absolutely amazing, then you don’t know what is)

It actually highkey annoys the demons in your classes, because you guys always crack everything right before an exam and while it helps you focus better, it effectively ruins their concentration

Ofc you guys don’t really care so they can suck it

But uh

Okay so the demons at RAD may or may not get fed up of you both one day and petition for Diavolo to instate a “No cracking body parts” rule in school

So yeah your primary source of entertainment sort of disappears after that point

But no worries, you and Solomon head to the downtown shopping districts instead and become the BEST hagglers in town

“Hey, can we get these shirts on a discount? Huh? You don’t do discounts? 

*Aggressively cracks everything until the demon just wants them out of the store*

“How about now BICH?”

Simeon

You’re actually not the one to introduce Simeon to the idea of humans being able to crack their body parts at will

No, it’s Solomon who steals that pleasure from you

But will Simeon ever let the sorcerer know just how much it unnerves him? Absolutely not. So what does our beloved angel do?

Why, there’s only one option

Come running straight to you.

Man is disturbed. Honestly, disturbed is phrasing it lightly. If he were in his angel form, you’d be able to see how his feathers ruffle and flutter at the very thought of that sound

Needless to say, he hates it

(You 100% consider cracking your knuckles in front of him, just to tease him, but you decide against it)

See, Simeon is an angel. And that means 99% of the time, he’s surrounded by other holy spirits, all of which have bodies molded to perfection that simply cannot crack the way yours can. Whereas demons are forced into human interaction a little more (oft when they're summoned), Simeon really isn’t used your fragility, no matter how much he tries to remind himself of it

So yeah

He hates it

On the other hand - man loves how flexible humans are

The first time you flop down onto your bed, assuming a position that would be impossible for any demon or angel to take but is deemed “comfortable” by you, Simeon is enraptured

It’s not sexual, he just thinks it’s really amazing that you have so much control over your body when he can hardly do a standing glute stretch without breaking a limb

It’s almost funny, his fixation

Actually no - it’s not almost funny. It is wholly and completely hilarious, and you will not stop leading him further down this rabbit hole

When you send this man picture of an contortionist, he’s utterly mesmerized

Show him human ballet, and he will not stop watching it

So yeah

He appreciates parts of the human body, hates others - but as long as you never crack your muscles in front of him, he’s down

Also - after you’ve thoroughly interested him in the art of being a human, he may just write about it in his next book. If you read the next set of chronicles detailed by Christopher Peugeot, you already know who the “feisty but good-hearted human who can bend themselves into a pretzel” is based on

(Bonus: Do a body roll in front of him and he might faint - man knew the human body could but like that? You might just have corrupted an angel)

Luke

“So...cool...!”

Boi loves it

He cheers you on like a champ, laughing merrily as you crack your knuckles into oblivion, scaring away the other residents in Purgatory Hall

And no matter how many times Simeon warns him not to urge you on (”The human already has no sense of self-preservation, and you don’t need to help that along,” he said), Luke can’t help but watch with excited eyes as you show him how different the human body is

He’s almost like Levi with his ardent admiration, and he honestly finds nothing disturbing about the sound of you cracking knuckles

Just finds it cool

It actually serves as a catalyst for his relationship with Solomon, because Luke will 100% go up to him and ask him whether he can crack his body like you, and obviously, the man will laugh and prove that centuries of knowledge have made him better than the average human - even in this area

But yeah

You can really see his inner child come out

(Though don’t say that last part out loud - he’ll ignore you for three days in an attempt to be “mature” before you convince him to accept your apology)

But really - he may be the only person who can not only tolerate the quirks of your body, but openly endorses all of them

On the downside, though, he’ll also try to crack his knuckles...which won’t bode too well, given that his body was built to perfection by God

Boi almost rips his finger off

Simeon proceeds to instate a no-cracking-knuckles rule within Purgatory Hall to discourage any further attempts from Luke

But you know what he didn’t ban?

Backflips.

It doesn’t matter if you can or you can’t do them - Luke will happen to see a video of a human doing one (ahem, Solomon showed him it in an attempt to stir up trouble), and now he’s begging you to do the same thing in real life

Which doesn’t work out too well, given that backflips are hard

And you may not be successful 100% of the time

And obviously, Simeon eventually finds out that the two of you have moved onto a new fixation, and so he instate the no-backflips-in-Purgatory-Hall rule

But you know what he didn’t ban? 

Cartwheels.

And so it continues on and on, indefinitely because the only way to cease your and Luke’s shenanigans would be to ban humans in Purgatory Hall, and Solomon is thankfully preventing him from doing that

Barbatos

Hates it, hates it, hates it

More than any of the brothers, more than any of the angels - this man loathes every oddity of the human body that makes it different from a demon’s

But not for the reasons you’d expect

See, it’s not the sound that bothers Barbatos

No, he’s heard the screams of the damned before. You cracking a few measly knuckles hardly makes him flinch as he pours your tea

But what Barbatos does hate is the fact that he doesn’t know what it means

Every single time you crack a knuckle in his presence, it doesn’t matter if the prince himself is speaking, because Barbatos’s eyes will fly straight to you

And yes - you guessed it:

Barbatos can’t tell the difference between the sound of you cracking your knuckles and the sound of you breaking a bone.

And for that reason, he hates it

It’s hardly his fault - he doesn’t even know if there is a difference between the two sounds. But this butler has no faith in you and no faith in humanity as a whole, so every time you crack your knuckles, it sends a rush of worry straight to his stomach, and the demon has to watch you for a solid ten seconds to make sure that you haven’t actually hurt yourself

Poor man

He’s the kind of guy to take everything in stride, so he'll probably never tell you how much he hates it when you crack your knuckles (and honestly, what would he say? “Hi, can you please stop cracking your knuckles because I care about you and it makes me concerned for your health???” No, that’s not going to work. And he doesn't know what will work, so he suffers in silence)

Seeing you stretch is even worse

It can be a casual stretch, simply pulling your arms above your head just slightly beyond what would be physically possible for a normal demon, but it sends a chill to Barbatos’s heart, and he’s worried all over again

See, when you crack your knuckles, at least it’s over. But when you stretch? Sometimes you hold your position for a minute, if not more - and Barbatos simply can’t turn away because he’s terrified that he will, and you’ll somehow hurt yourself

So yeah

No rest for this butler, not as long as you’re going around with that weak body of yours and are cracking and stretching your way into oblivion

On the bright side, it means that he’s almost always watching over you when you visit, an added layer of protection 

The only difference is that while the others are focused on protecting you from other demons, Barbatos is preoccupied with making sure you don’t hurt yourself

Diavolo

Timing is everything

And indeed, you just happen to be in the midst of cracking your knuckles and neck the moment you’re transported to the Devildom, every single one of the most powerful demons in the land staring at you in horror as your body pops some more

"Oh no,” Diavolo whispers, frowning as he looks at Barbatos. “We got a defective human :(”

Nevermind the insult you feel at his words (who does this strange, unfairly-attractive redhead think he is, calling you “defective???” He might be correct in his judgement, but he had no right to voice his thoughts!), you are shook

Definitely not the best first impression for either of you to make

Of course, Lucifer is quick to pick things up with his explanation of what this place is and who he is, and the whole situation is mostly forgotten as you come to realize that you’re standing in front of a literal prince

But the past has a way of resurfacing

And obviously, several months later, you crack your knuckles once more in the presence of the demon lord

The immediate wince on his face is more than enough for you to read his mind

“You’re thinking I’m defective again, aren’t you?”

“YOU REMEMBER THAT?!”

Poor bby

He’s honestly such a brilliant ruler, but when it comes to maneuvering the minds of humans, it’s just not his strong suit

Anyway, the two of you have a long talk (aka you rant and Diavolo listens) where you explain to him that cracking knuckles is a normal phenomenon, and that - look, you can even crack other parts of your body

And the prince is fascinated

He knew humans were built differently than demons, but he’d simply assumed that your body was just as perfect as his, and that yours could simply handle less extreme conditions

Clearly, though, that wasn’t the case

Man decides that, as the ruler of hell and the man spearheading efforts to unite the three realms, it is his moral obligation to learn about the other ways humans differ from demons

And so the shenanigans begin

It’s honestly time-consuming, but Lucifer doesn’t mind because if you’re with Diavolo, you’re out of trouble, and Barbatos doesn’t mind because if Diavolo’s with you, then he’s out of trouble

All in all, it becomes the prelude to a LOT of time spent together, and a LOT of differences between demons and humans come to light. 

Aka various iterations of “What do you mean, humans can’t bite through steel?”

[lo-frequency]

Hi I love your blogand your writinh so much it's so good!

Could I request a shoto/denki and toga x chubby reader (if you're not comfortable writing with toga you can just to denki and shoto) thanks!

Fortunately for you, anon, I did them all! (and it's kinda long, so my bad lol) Also, there's mention of insecurity in Toga's, but it quickly turns to fluff. As always, please enjoy!

Denki

-Believe it or not, Denki was nervous to confess to you because he was afraid of being rejected. You’re so cute and cool and that he was sure there’s no way you actually returned his feelings. It was worth a shot, tho. So imagine his joy when you said you felt the same way :)

-Rants about you all the time to his friends, to the point where they feel like they know you personally before you’ve even met. They also get to hear all the tmi stories about what the two of you do alone, because he can’t help himself (if they don’t walk away first, lol).

-He knew you looked squishy before, but couldn’t believe how soft your skin was when he finally got to hold you. It was almost unfair. He often finds himself caressing your skin mindlessly whenever you’re close together, hand always ghosting across your arm or hand (or your thigh ;) ).

-Lays back on you to play video games, his head cushioned by your pillowy chest and the rest of his body situated between your legs as you watch him play. Play in his hair or rub his arms and he will fall asleep. The tingly feeling he gets when cuddling with you is his favorite kind of electricity.

-Zaps your butt “by accident”

-Easily flustered, but he tries to play it off with his cool act. Just kiss his cheek or tell him he’s handsome and watch him ramble about knowing he’s “irresistible” until he flushes red up to his ears.

-Denki can be pretty corny at times but he does have his serious moments, mostly when you two are alone together. He shows you what’s beneath his goofy facade, a boy with dreams and aspirations just like everyone else. After seeing this side of him, it’s a little irritating to hear people reduce him to an idiot (although he does have his moments 💀)

-Them thighs tho 😏 “Dang babe, you been working out?” “Not really, Kaminari” He clucks his tongue. “Sheesh, imagine being that thicc...naturally” he says, shaking his head as if it were a shame.

-Truly believes he has the best s/o in the whole school. Does not take offense to being called a simp 🤷🏾‍♀️.

-Wasn’t aware of it at first, but became super attracted to people with your same body type. His eyes always lingered on them in public, and he couldn’t help but think they were kinda hot (sorry, y/n)

-Very affectionate, but loves to receive as much as give, so please give this man plenty of kithes and hugs, he gets the shakes if he doesn’t get his daily dose of Y/n love.

-Y’all are so silly together, always cracking jokes or giggling about something. You eventually develop a similar sense of humor, and have so many inside jokes people can’t decipher your conversation. If anybody has anything negative to say about y’all: Denki puts his hand over his earpiece and says to you (from right next to him) “Pikachu to Big Sexy, I’m picking up some negative vibes on the radar, do you copy?” And you, holding your hand up to your own ear, say “Affirmative, doing a diagnostic scan...it’s a hater, confirmed.” Cue the obnoxious laughter, lmaoo

-Never forgets the anniversaries or relationship milestones. He even remembers the date of yall’s first kiss, and thinks about it every time the date passes (although he wouldn’t tell you that tho, that would be too sappy, even for him).

Shoto

-The way you and Shoto became acquainted was a little unorthodox. You fell on him during a training session one day, and the feeling of your soft body pressed against his was a new experience for him, to put it mildly. Shoto stood up from it a changed man. Call it an awakening, if you will.

-You were a little put off by all his staring since that incident, thinking he didn’t like you despite all your profuse apologies. But after Izuku dropped hints that it was probably fascination rather than contempt, your relationship progressed smoothly from there (thanks mostly to your efforts, since Shoto had no clue how to approach you).

-Shoto still had a staring problem once y’all became official, too. Whenever you asked him what he was looking at, he was not ashamed to tell you exactly why: you are too fine not to stare (ok, maybe he didn’t say it exactly like that)

-Not overly affectionate in public, but has a tendency to always stand or sit close to you whenever he can. Just sharing the same space is intimate to him.

-Sharing a bowl of soba noodles 💕

-Buys you expensive gifts all the time, and loves to see you using them. Especially if it’s clothes, it’s like a piece of him is always with you even when you’re not together (plus, it shows you’re all his ;) ).

-Now, I’m gonna tell y’all a little secret. It’s pretty shocking, so be warned: Shoto sometimes pretends to be oblivious when you hint at wanting affection, just to make you beg for it. Maybe you brush your hand against his, and he moves it. Or maybe he saw you lean for a kiss and he casually turns the other way just to hear you complain. He likes it, makes him feel wanted.

-Devious, I know, but just get even 😏

-When y’all are alone, he loves when you hold him close and just sit there, peacefully enjoying each other’s presence. He also likes to lay on your lap while reading a book or watching tv with you, slowly nodding off as you comb your fingers through his hair.

-Obsessed with you, but not in an unhealthy way, it’s just that you’ve become such a big part of his life that he kinda...thinks about you all the time. Shoto is canonically not very talkative, but I think that with you, he’d open up more about his true thoughts and feelings. So when he shoots you that blank stare when his classmates are up to some bull, you know exactly what it means.

-Also revels in knowing you that well, too. He’d flex how much he knows about you to the other people and sometimes unintentionally embarrasses you in the process

-For example: “Here Y/n, a cherry popsicle just for you!” Shoto immediately hands you some napkins before adding “Y/n doesn’t usually eat cherry popsicles, they always drop the red juice on their clothes.” Like gee, good looking out Shoto...thanks for telling the whole class I can’t eat without messing up my clothes 💀. He’s sweet tho, he has good intentions.

Toga

-She made it very clear from the beginning that she liked you, and with how smitten she was, who were you to refuse her (aggressive) advances?

- She thought your plump figure was just so cute, one of the cutest things she’d ever seen, and she quickly developed an unhealthy obsession with squeezing your chub.

-When you two are together, Toga is always attached to you in some way, whether she’s hanging off your arm or has her arms looped around your shoulders.

-Starts to eat the same foods you eat, borrow your clothes all the time, listen to your favorite artists, whatever way she could become closer to you

-Writes you love letters or sends you cute text messages all the time, you’re always on her mind, even when she’s on missions. “My Y/n is wayy cuter than you! Let’s get this over quick so I go back to them, ok? 🥰 🔪🔪”

-I know y’all were waiting for this...she most definitely uses her quirk on you. Toga loves you so much, she wants to become you. So one day, you finally allow her to give it a try.

-She tells you to close your eyes, and when she gives you permission to open them, you find yourself staring...yourself in the face. And you do not like it 🤢. There’s something so strange about seeing yourself in 3rd person, in all dimensions. Is this how you look to her, all the time? You quickly lose interest in this little charade, looking everywhere but at yourself as Toga prances around doing sexy poses in your body and giggling. However, when she sees your reaction, she stops.

- “Hm? What’s wrong, Y/n?” she asks with a tilt of (your) her head. You glance at yourself, then look away again. “This is so weird. I don’t like looking at myself” you say, grimacing at the slight bounce and jiggle of your body when she walks toward you.

-In Toga’s eyes, you were absolutely adorable. In fact, she was getting a little hot and bothered just taking peeks at herself (you) in the mirror. She’s used to feeling you up for sure, but being you was a whole other experience. Though, she can understand your insecurity. After all, it’s hard to live in a world that constantly tells you your true self is abnormal. She knows from experience.

-So, she comes up to you with a flirty grin on her face...and starts showering you with kisses, in your body! You start to protest, weirded out by the feeling of your own lips on your cheeks but she would not relent. Toga was determined to show you what being loved (by you) felt like from her perspective, with your irresistible “imperfections” and all 💕

Thanks for tuning in! :)

[mysticpetals]

Supermarket runs

Pairing: Jake × mc (Syianne)

Genre: fluff, humor

Words: 2.5k

Summary: Three times Jake ran into Syianne and one time he actually made plans.

Anonymous asked: Hello. If you do still requests, can you do 27 and 40, with Jake and MC from Duskwood from fluff? Sorry I forgot to add that.

Prompts: 27. "Are you blushing?" 40. "Why are you so afraid of loving?"

Notes: here it is! A cute meet up fic with Jake's point of view. I hope you like this one because it's going to be the last thing I'll be posting for a while 😬

Jake had reached his new hideout just a few hours ago.

After evading yet another capture from the government and planting false trails in his wake, he had escaped to a small town, renting an apartment for the time being.

Opening the door to his new house for a few days, he put his cat down, opened his cage and let him explore. Glitch immediately disappeared and Jake put his bags down, sighing tiredly.

He needed to make a quick run to the store nearby, getting some food and other essential items since it was clear that they didn't stock it in the room.

Before he could change his mind, Jake picked up his wallet, locking the door and walked to the store he came across on his way over to the apartment.

It was a medium sized store, probably the one of the few in this small town. Jake browsed the shelves picking up the things he needed along the way. He avoided eye contact with everyone, putting his hood up.

When he was done, he quietly put the few cup noodles and microwaveable dinners on the counter and waited for the cashier to scan his items. Just as he went to pick up the first item, the cashier's phone rang and he glanced at the screen, eyes widening in surprise before his face settled into panic.

"Oh shit, oh shit, I completely forgot," he mumbled to himself frantically and giving Jake an apologetic glance, ran towards the back room.

Well then, it wasn't like he was in any hurry either. He didn't want to go back so soon anyway. He rocked back on his heels, adjusting his mask so that it still covered the lower half of his face and looked around in boredom.

From the backroom, he could hear two voices arguing, one male and other female and just when he thought that maybe it was going to take a while, the cashier ran out of the room, hefting a jacket over his shoulders and looked back.

"I owe you one, Syianne! Thank you so much!"

Jake tilted his head on hearing the familiar name, memories of conversations with his Syianne creeping up.

"You really do, Percy! I better have a three day weekend after this!" The girl shouted back and Jake smiled behind his mask. She even sounded like her.

The cashier yelled back something but he was already out the door to hear properly. The girl came out from the back, wearing her uniform jacket and grumbling about having to do two shifts, but Jake had frozen.

"Sorry about that. My coworker forgot about the date with his girlfriend and had to bolt. Between you and me, she's pretty scary so I'd be running too," she said, already ringing up his few items but Jake couldn't reply. He kept staring at her familiar face, which he had accidentally accessed when going through her chats before.

This was his Syianne.

She glanced at him, probably wondering why he didn't say anything before looking back on the screen. He broke out of his stupor when she told him the total and held up a bag with his items.

His fingers brushed against her and it felt like a lifetime, blood rushing to his cheeks and heart pacing.

"Thank you," he said and got a smile in return.

"You're welcome! Sorry about the delay earlier."

He shook his head rapidly, telling her that it was no trouble and he completely understood. That made her smile widen, her eyes crinkling with happiness.

"Come again soon!"

Oh, he'd be coming back very soon, indeed.

The first thing he did after reaching home was to power on his laptop and search for Syianne's location. Glitch hissed angrily at him for disturbing his slumber atop the chair he was now sitting in but Jake's eyes were fixed on the screen.

The results baffled him, as it showed her living in a completely different country from when he had searched her before, when he had just gotten her number. And then, realisation dawned on him that she might be using a VPN.

He banged his head on the table in frustration but also a little impressed that Syianne had thought of doing something like this to protect her identity.

He was supposed to stay away from all of them, to prevent pulling people into his messes but now one of the most important people in his life literally worked a walk away from his hiding place. He couldn't change places so frequently as it hadn't even been a day and he had to give some time to the police to cool off, before he got on the move again.

He sighed, too wound up to make anything but cup noodles, he got up and went into the kitchen. Glitch trailed behind him, sniping at his heels for his own food and Jake emptied the last can of cat food into Glitch's bowl.

With a jolt, he realised that he would have to go to the supermarket tomorrow again and it brought him equal parts of excitement as well as anxiety at the thought of seeing Syianne again.

———

The next evening, he put the cans of cat food on the counter and was disappointed to find that the guy from yesterday – Percy, if he recalled right – was going to scan his items.

Jake shifted the mask on his face and looked around to see if Syianne was somewhere but to no avail. If Percy noticed him looking around, he didn't say anything. When he grabbed the bag from him, the employee room opened and Syianne came out wearing casual clothes, a bag slung over her shoulder.

"See you tomorrow, Percy!"

She came out from behind the counter and her eyes widened in surprise as they fell on him.

"Oh hi! You're the one from yesterday."

Jake cleared his throat and let out a hesitant, "Y-yeah."

Percy snickered, throwing a knowing look at Jake before turning to Syianne.

"Yeah, see you tomorrow, idiot. Bring some coffee with you." He handed Jake his bag as he scrambled to bring out his wallet to pay and gave him a wide smile.

"Syianne here works the morning shifts." He winked and Jake was mortified to hear the amusement in his voice, knowing that he had been caught.

"I'm not bringing you anything until I get my three-day weekend. Anyway, nice to see you again…." She trailed off when she turned to Jake and his mind went into overdrive as he thought about whether he should tell her his real name or not.

"Phil." He blurted out, "My name's Phil."

She tilted her head, no doubt thinking about that bartender from Duskwood who was currently locked up in jail.

"Funny, I know a guy named Phil. Not from around here though." She glanced at the door giving him a final smile.

"Because all the customers come in the evening." Percy complained and Syianne only rolled her eyes at his antics.

"Well, come by in the morning if you want to chat. It's pretty chill that time."

"Deal with it. Anyway, see you tomorrow." She waved one last time and walked out, Jake's eyes following her figure until she disappeared around the corner.

"She's sweet and a little too trustful. I better not hear any complaints about you from her Phil or I won't hesitate to throw a punch or two." Percy threatened and Jake flushed before muttering a hasty excuse and practically running out of the store.

She actually talked to him today and hearing her voice, her words just made it harder for him to stay away. But it was okay if he didn't tell her who he was, right? She won't be in any danger then, right?

These thoughts chased him as he walked back to his temporary home, almost tripping over Glitch when he entered and found a disgruntled cat, waiting for his food.

———

The next morning, Jake worked in his room, occasionally shooing away Glitch who was determined to get his daily dose of affection.

"Just a minute, Glitch." He muttered, typing rapidly, his eyes scanning the screen with an eerie quickness.

A loud, disgruntled meow from his cat breaks the silence again and Jake heaved a frustrated sigh, pushing his laptop away and glaring at the culprit.

"Fine, you little devil! I'll give you breakfast first."

He walked out of the room, Glitch trailing behind him, purring in appreciation and hopped on to a chair while Jake took out the instant pancake mixture that he had recently bought. And that reminded him of the fact that Syianne was here, so close and whether he should tell her or not.

Making the pancakes in a daze, he put a plate in front of Glitch who immediately started gobbling it up. Jake huffed out a laugh and made his own plate, sitting across from his cat. The syrup was towards Glitch and when he leaned forward to take it, he was met by Glitch's paw swatting at his hand.

"What the hell? You ate already! Let me eat too!"

Glitch's paw rested on the syrup bottle and edged it towards the end of the table.

Jake froze.

"Glitch, no. Give me the syrup."

The bottle shifted a bit more.

"No, Glitch. Stop that."

The cat looked at him and stopped and Jake gave a sigh of relief, only to throw back his head in exasperation at the next moment as the bottle was finally pushed off the table.

"You little devil! I'm going to—"

The cat sprang up and ran into the other room, leaving Jake in the kitchen alone.

"Why is it always me?"

———

After cleaning up the kitchen and eating pancakes without any syrup, Jake found himself in the supermarket once again, embarrassed about being there everyday for the last three or so days.

When he put his items on the counter, including a syrup in a plastic bottle this time, he found himself facing Syianne who gave her an amused look.

"Having a good day, Phil?"

It took a moment for Jake to understand that she was talking to him and he flushed when he met her gaze.

"Not really. My cat decided to be an asshole today."

Syianne laughed and if Jake could have heard it everyday, he would. When she scanned his bandaids, she raised an eyebrow, and Jake gave her a sheepish smile, showing her his poorly wrapped hand.

"Oh no, that looks bad," she said but Jake only shook his head.

"It's better than it looks, I promise. I'm just bad at wrapping things up."

She didn't smile but only looked behind him. Seeing no more customers, she gestured for him to come to her side of the counter. Confused, he did as she asked and understanding dawned on him when he saw her opening the packet of gauze he had just bought.

"Oh, no, no. It's okay. I can do it at home." He rushed but she didn't listen, silently asking for him to hold his hand forward. When he realised that Syianne wasn't going to take no for an answer, he sighed and put his hand forward, face heating up and he regretted forgetting to wear a face mask that day.

"Are you blushing?" She asked teasingly and his flush only worsened.

"I-I'm not used to other people caring for me."

She hummed.

"That must be lonely."

She carefully unwrapped his hand, winching at the sight of blood and cleaned it with antiseptic wipes, before wrapping a bandage around the cut. Her hands were gentle but firm, as if she knew what she was doing and had done it a hundred times before. Jake was suddenly hit with a weird nostalgia, a feeling of wanting to know who she was, how many siblings she had, what her goals were.

He didn't realise when she had stopped, staring at him, as he was looking at her and only after several minutes had passed, did Syianne dropped her hands, letting him know that she was done.

The thought struck him like lightning and he quickly grabbed his bags, muttering another thank you and getting a simple smile in return. Before he knew, he was out on the streets and on the way to his house, his thoughts a raging turmoil.

"Thank you very much." He spoke softly, quietly, overwhelmed by such a gesture from her. He was essentially a stranger and she had still helped him, not knowing who he was.

She didn't know who he was.

What was he doing? Going to see her like that, finding excuses to go to the supermarket in hopes of seeing her? What did he want to accomplish?

He released a shaky sigh, running his hands through his hair, when he reached the place. Glitch, knowing that it wasn't the time for his shenanigans, only gave a welcoming meow from his place on the couch.

Maybe it was time he started searching again.

Jake opened his laptop but the ping from his phone made him look for it, heart quickening when he saw her name on it.

Syianne [5:00 pm]

Hey Jake!

How are you doing? I hope you're safe

I patched up a guy today who came in at work. He had a cat too!

Anyway, I don't know why I'm still writing but I hope you're safe and nobody got to you

Why are you so afraid of loving?

Sorry, insensitive question. Ignore that

Waiting for when you come back

...I'm still looking forward to that date

Jake's lips quirked at her messages, warmed by her concern. She had messaged him everyday ever since he went into hiding again. He hadn't replied then, being busy because of his relocation, but now….

In a bold move, very uncharacteristic for him, he messaged her back.

Jake [5:03 pm]

What if I told you that the guy you patched up was me?

Syianne [5:04 pm]

What?

His name was Phil

Oh

Jake waited as she typed and erased, all of it going on for two minutes before she stopped. Jake had a sudden, terrible feeling that perhaps he had made a mistake but soon enough, she replied.

Syianne [5:06 pm]

You're cute in real life as well <3

Jake laughed, amused by her flirty response and decided that perhaps he'd stay there for a few more days.

Syianne [5:06 pm]

What about that date at the Chinese restaurant you promised me?

Jake [5:07 pm]

Does tomorrow work for you? ;)

[just-a-sleepy-idiot]

Karl Heisenberg Imagine: Becoming his Assistant

Content/Warnings: Gender neutral Reader, Lots of cursing, Fluff

It had been a few weeks now since he took you in, since you got unfortunate on your hiking trip and stumbled upon this village.

You had approached him and asked about directions, baffling the Lord by being adressed so unbeknownst of everything he was capable of.

All you knew that despite his attire there was something imposing about this man, and you figured that this was in your favor in concerns of finding a way out of here- a guy like him would know his way around the forests.

He cracked a joke, not directly meant for you but rather as an amusing remark for himself- but you laughed softly and gave him a crooked smile over his dry humor.

Heisenberg felt some sympathy well up towards you- how strange it was not to be looked at in either fear or disgust, gazes he received mainly from the Townspeople and in second the enormous Man-eater in the castle, that almost mockingly loomed over him at all times.

He knew well that he was supposed to present you to Mother Miranda, but he didn’t fucking care about that anyways so he actually ended up giving you proper directions.

You departed and he thought you safe, up until he was out for another ‚Family meeting‘ and saw you sitting there in shackles. One of the others had caught you and obedient as they were they had brought you here.

He wanted to cuss when he saw you, but he kept his cool and pretended not to recognize you under the watchful gaze of that feathered fuck.

As the discussion set off Dimitrescu of course asked to take you with her as an addition to her four course human meal- but Heisenberg argued that he could make better use of you instead, insisting that you would come with him.

When you had first seen the familiar face entering the room you wore a mixed expression of relief and fear alike, not knowing what if his presence might proof to be beneficial to your survival after he had been so nice back then. But after all you didn’t know if he had just given you false directions, leading you right to were you were caught.

And when he made that proposal.. your eyes widened with hope, quietly watching him and the tall Lady argue over who had the right to claim you when the woman in the middle intervened- she had made her decision. And while you were holding your breath you felt one of two fates dividing further from another, paving the road for a possibly very close ending or.. something else.

You wished to take the longer road even if you didn’t knew what his victory would mean for you.

„The Outsider shall go with Heisenberg. Make good use of them, I don’t want to regret making this decision in your favor.“

The Lady with the hat was clearly angry about that, but you didn‘t even listen to what else was spoken because of the sheer relief hitting you.

Heisenberg approached you now with a great metal Hammer casually dropped over his shoulders and leaned down to take a look at you.

As he did so you could catch a glimpse past his glasses and your eyes met. He send you a wink before hiking you up to stand by your handcuffs, the gesture meant for you only having past by unnoticed.

He made sure to rub this victory under the Ladies nose with a sassy grin by saying things that would have been quite polite if every word wasn’t so clearly dripping with sarcasm. You suppressed a smile at that behavior, it greatly contrasted to the horror of nearly becoming someones meal just a few minutes ago.

You headed away with him, dipped into the winter cold and falling snow secluding you from the others.

You decided to lay out the first meeting with him in his favor, feeling like he did actually give you right directions. So you hoped.. that he might free you now that you were away from the scary figures that had eyed you with such malicious intend before.

„You.. can loose the handcuffs now you know“ but he tilted his head at you with a smile,

„You heard her Darling, I’m gonna make good use of you. You will be working for me now.“

From then on you assisted him in his factory, which mostly entailed putting away his tools again after impulsive sessions of working for hours. He complained about you tidying up his workspace, saying that he liked things better his way. But the way he would curse and loudly rummage less since you introduced a system to his workplace spoke for itself.

He liked complaining to you even if it wasn't serious or wasn't even about you, it just came easier to him than starting a conversation through any 'normal' topics. Because there were no 'normal' topics among his family either, they would just talk about gloomy shit if there was even anything to discuss.

Often he would order you to stay around while he was working so he could have an eye on you, yet most of the time he found himself just showing you how the machines work that he was working on even if there wasn't a reason for him to do so.

"You wanna plug this in here if you want it to keep the rotation, see?"

He build machines who's purpose was so cruel you really didn't want to imagine what poor soul would encounter them once he send them out. But as there was nothing else left to do than doing chores and the like.. you lately begun telling him whatever idea for them popped up in your head no matter how ridiculous they were.

"What if this one had chainsaws for hands and a sharp edged metal fan instead of a head?"

Heisenberg was surprised to see what kind of person you were as you slowly went to be more at ease around him, but what he enjoyed the most about it was when you shared your thoughts with him.

Because when he was working, when you were quietly accompanying him while he was concentrating on the mechanics you were strangely more open to just saying what came to your mind. Usually you would choose your words very carefully, still wary of his cocky nature at times. But you begun letting your guard down a little when you were sat in his workshop with him.

And he absolutely loved your ideas, and even if they didn't make sense at times he would sometimes put them into his work just because it sounded so cool. When you first saw one of your ideas actually ending up on the finished project, you sneakily painted a little heart were you suspected he wouldn't find it.

You weren't proud of fueling his imagination in terms of killing machines, but you did like seeing one of your ideas realized in the end so you put a little signature on it.. just because.

But he did see it and.. well he put his signature next to yours because if you sign his project he definitely gets to do so too. Strangely enough he couldn’t get himself to send the machine out where it could get damaged. He keeps it as a 'model example' for recreating it again.

The better you got to know each other the more often he would sarcastically call you 'Dear' when making a cocky comment. You ignored how this set off a different kind of thrill within you, something not as bad as the fear you had learned to recognize so well since you got here.

You in turn slowly became more bold with him too, even though like him it was more through actions than words.

Which was what you resided to again when he came back from a particularly unnerving family meeting. No words, no remark about the absurdly large hat of Lady Dimitrescu or the ridiculous attitude of Miranda. He wasn’t the kind of person to greet or say goodbye but he‘d always pop up to see if you were still there when he came back- but not this time.

He just went straight to his workplace, grabbing anything in reach to just craft and get his mind to start working as mechanical as the thing he was working on, blending out everything that wasn’t hard cold metal.

You observed him for a while, usually he sensed that directly and made a comment about it to you but right now he was just completely going for work and nothing else.

So you let him be, until after hours and hours he still haven’t got up once or reacted to any attempts to talk to him.

The sun had set a long time ago, and he still showed no signs of stopping. As if he was planning on just keep on working until he didn’t have any fuel left anymore, just like his creations.

You didn’t want to overstep, didn’t want to risk angering the man who could easily change his mind about sparing your life.

But this was.. too much for him, and even though you could clearly see him working at his desk it didn’t feel like him anymore right now whatsoever.

You cautiously approached the man, lights flickering over the desk and extending his movements further as shadows.

„You have worked on it so much already, why don’t you continue tomorrow?“

No answer

„You should go to bed, I’m sure soon enough you won’t be able to concentrate anymore.“

No response yet again. And honestly you should be going to sleep yourself, you stayed up curious about when he would finally get up again or at least say something.

And you had no fucking idea what made you do this now, if the confidence in talking freely around here had misled you into becoming stupid now but you walked up to him.

You walked up to him, pressing his chair back for enough room to stand between him and the desk. You gripped onto the armrests and pressed your knees next to his hips, sitting down to straddle him and forcing him to look right at you now.

You felt his warmth even through the fabric of his pants, and eyed him intensely for an reaction- nervousness welling up with every second as you realized what the heck you were doing.

„Heisenberg, talk to me.“

There was a gentleness in your voice you forbid yourself from showing before, keeping a certain distance no matter how much more you talked to him.

His eyes widened behind the shades, and yet again you surprised him with behavior that no one else would ever dare to consider but here you were.

He stayed silent, but this time you could see that he was reacting.

„Either way you are a fucking fool or my downfall.“ He eventually grumbled lowly, and put his large hands on your thighs. They traveled down to grabbing you below your butt by the legs.

He then stood up with you securely pressed up against him. Surprised by the sudden move you quickly grabbed onto him for stability, before you were set down on his desk a moment after.

Heisenberg grumbled and put his arms next to yours, caging you but with his head laid low as to not look at you.

„Today was really fucking exhausting.“ He confessed and pulled his hat off, forcibly pressing it on the desk next to you.

And you felt a pull between you, a silent agreement. And you that he could not do it himself, so you reached out to him.

Your arms wrapped around his broad back in a hug and you dropped your head to lie on his chest. He remained as he was, letting you embrace him without yet being able to loose his stern expression.

But soon you could feel how the tension gradually dopped from his body, and heard his exhales becoming softer.

Heisenberg just closed his eyes, safely hiding this contempt he felt behind the sunglasses. God he couldn’t even remember thw last time he was embraced like this but nonetheless it felt so right in an instant.

Only in the end he now fleetingly put his hand on your back before parting, grumpily avoiding eye contact as he put his hat back on.

„You’re right, it’s pretty late. Lets go to sleep.“

He went to leave the room and before he went out, Heisenberg actually send you one of his smirks again.

„Tomorrow I‘m going to show you what I was working on.“

- - -

If you liked this please comment I worked a lot on this

[kyberphilosopher]

Eunoia

The Mantis crew decides to take a well deserved break.  Word Count: 2422

Warning(s): straight fluff, short Requested: yep This can be read for a female, male, non binary, or any other reader.

Eunoia is the shortest English word containing all five main vowel graphemes. It comes from the Greek word εὔνοια, meaning "well mind" or "beautiful thinking”. It is also a rarely used medical term referring to a state of normal mental health. In rhetoric, eunoia is the goodwill a speaker cultivates between himself and his audience, a condition of receptivity. In book eight of Nicomachean Ethics, Aristotle uses the term to refer to the kind and benevolent feelings of goodwill a spouse has which form the basis for the ethical foundation of human life.

* ✭ ˚ ･ﾟ ✧ *･ﾟ * ✭˚･ﾟ ✧* ･  *

Cal is actually not as observant as people think he is. You know because you’ve been leaning against his doorway, watching him, for about two minutes now and he hasn’t noticed a thing. 

Maybe if you were in his position you’d be the same. That seems about right. He’s hunched over his desk with the lamp on bright, tinkering with something that you can only assume is for BD-1. He’s probably lost in thought. Maybe he’s dreaming of better days. Or maybe he’s just trying to figure out which wires and bolts connect to which. There’s no way to be certain from your position. He’s the mechanic, you are not. 

So why have you been watching the redhead from his doorway for three minutes now? A simple answer. He is your friend, and you enjoy his company. Even when he’s not giving you attention, completely unaware to your presence in moments like this one, lost in his own world, it’s his warmth that really counts. Cal is such a relaxing bout of fresh air compared to everything else in the galaxy, in your life. It’s like being at a great party, but whether you enjoy it or not, stepping outside and tasting the air and the smell of something wonderful. Even if you had a day full of talking to people and had become burned out, talking to Cal would have been no problem at all. Maybe in a way that makes him your favorite person. 

Yeah, maybe. 

BD-1 jumps onto Cal’s desk. His head looks at the boys hands, cocking about as if observing. Then he meets your gaze, only to find a smile. One index finger raises to your lips, prompting the little droid to stay quiet about this, before you turn away and head towards the main part of the ship. 

“Where’s Cal?” Greez gruffs upon seeing you. He’s shaking spice onto a steaming brown plate, which puts a pep in your step. Greez’s cooking always makes life better. 

“In his room,” you answer. You turn from the doorway to the counter, where something hot does cause stringy, swirly puffs of air to waft upwards from a large metal container. With your back to Greez, you pull a plate for yourself and begin hulling it full of food. Some sort of rice or grain?  

“Hmph, that reminds me,” the Latero begins mid-chew. “Me and Cere was talking about taking a vacation.”

“Vacation?” you scrunch your eyebrows and put the lid back on the container. “Where to?”

“The beach maybe?”

You scoff as you turn around and lean on the counter. One hand holds the plate while the other uses your index finger to prod at the mush. It smells alluring. The individual pieces of it stick to your skin. They burn and sting, but it’s so small it doesn’t bring much of a reaction. “I don’t know a lot of beaches.”

“Well, ya know,” Greez shrugs. “Just a thought.”

* ✭ ˚ ･ﾟ ✧ *･ﾟ * ✭˚･ﾟ ✧* ･  *

It was more than just a thought. Six days later, the Mantis touches down on Scarif. But first there’s the issue of landing. 

“Watch that tree,” you point, leaning over Cal’s shoulder as he co-pilots beside Greez. A second later, the ship gives a great rock and the palm tree crunches beneath it. “You weren’t watching the tree.”

“Sorry,” Cal offers sheepishly. 

“What?” Greez says. He’s the one in main control of the ship. He’d never let Cal take over the whole thing. “What he do?”

“Ran over a tree,” you snort. 

“Cal!” Cere scolds, turning around in her chair. 

“I said I was sorry!” Cal defends. 

“I’m telling the wookies what you did,” you whisper.

“Don’t,” Cal whispers back, though it’s still desperate. 

The Mantis parks itself in a field of tropical emerald on the cuff of a beach. The sand is white, the waves cyan and royal blue and sloshing. There’s several beaches on the planet. All of which are very beautiful. Would be a true shame if anything were to ever happen to Scarif. It’s so different compared to so many other planets in the galaxy- not occupied by Imperial forces or scumbags. 

Greez waves everybody off. Cere exits first. Cal is ahead of you, but he steps to the side and rather gentlemanly insists, “You first.”

You hum and move past him. The Scarif air hits your face with a warm breeze. It smells of salt and water and some kind of flower. The horizon goes orange and pink and salmon with the setting sun. It is... serene. It nearly knocks you off your feet. It takes his voice to realize Cal is beside you at the bottom of the ramp. 

“Woah,” he offers simply, in as much awe as yourself. 

“Woah,” you repeat in agreement. It’s still for a second. “Come on. Let’s join them. Or else I’ll have to cast a Jedi mind trick on you.” Your fingers wiggle up and down by Cal’s face for dramatic effect. 

Cal rolls his eyes. “Shut up,” he utters with a push on your elbow, urging you forward into the sand. 

Okay, so maybe you like Cal more than just a friend. But who can blame you? Things had been feeling different between you two lately. You’d always gotten along pretty smoothly. You made up for skills that Cal seemed to lack himself, and his abilities- human and nonhuman- never ceased to amaze you. He was a friend. And then, when you tended to the stab wound he’d gotten from Vader, there was a moment where you held each others eyes. After that, the joking became more constant. The little touches on the shoulders and elbows and forehead taps happened more often. And you started watching him from his doorway sometimes and... and at some point you just caught feelings. 

Cal Kestis seemed to feel the same, but who could really say? No use poking that bear right now. 

The sand is soft, even beneath your boots. Cere stands in front of the water, just breathing in the air. The light breeze makes her vest ripple. It’s tempting to just join her. 

“Gotta say,” you hear a familiar voice say from your left and below. “We picked a nice place.”

“Maybe we should stay a while,” you joke, though you secretly hope for it, to Greez. 

“Yeah,” Greez rolls his eyes. “Until this moron gets us into trouble again!”

Cal perks up. “What did I do?”

“Anybody who can lift things with their mind is gonna attract some attention, kid. You just brought it on us.”

“So true,” you jump on with a smirk to Cal. 

“Alright,” Cal turns away towards the beach. You position yourself so you’re closer to him, and Greez takes the opportunity to waddle away further ahead to waves.

“Sorry for bursting your bubble, Cal,” you continue with a smug grin. “Maybe in the next life, don’t be born with force powers? Just a suggestion.”

“You think you’re so funny,” Cal tells you, though he’s smiling too. His pale green eyes spare a glance at you, thick lashes dancing on his boyish face. 

Your knees bend until you collapse on your bottom in the sand. It’s so soft, it doesn’t even resist your weight. It makes way for you easily, like a blanket. “I do.”

Cal joins you in the sand quickly enough. You’re both face to face, the wind in your hair and the water at your side. It crashes every few seconds, but it’s peaceful. Some kind of bird flies overhead, and butterflies are in the forested area behind you. The light of the sunset illuminates Cal’s hair more than usual. The brightest points of his eyes are highlighted. 

“He loves you,” you offer. 

“You think so?”

“I am one hundred percent certain... Just don’t touch the ship.”

Cal raises his hands as if surrendering. “Understood. Hands off.”

You turn your head to the water. Greez and Cere are standing ahead, most likely having a conversation of their own. The tide carries so much of the stress your shoulders hold away from you. Everything with the holocron, the empire- it was ridiculous what living in hiding could do to a person. It’s hard to imagine how Cal did it for so long. How painful that must’ve been for him. How painful it is to imagine him in pain. 

“How’s your stomach?” you decide to ask at last. 

Cal tilts his head for a second. “Better.”

“Perfect?” you raise your knees to your chest and rest your arms on them. 

Just then, a little whirring noise pulls both of your attentions away. BD-1 bounds down the ramp of the ship, twirling around in observance as if excited. “Hey, BD,” Cal greets. “I know, buddy. I know.” The droid places itself in Cal’s lap, still looking around at the change in scenery. 

“We’ve never been able to do this before,” you tell him. “I mean, I wasn’t here for the whole adventure. But I was here after and before and... and just... we’ve never done this.”

Cal is quiet. “I haven’t either.”

You look at him. 

“Taken a break. I guess time on Bracca was the closest thing.”

You smile softly. “I’m sure it was really nice.”

Cal rolls his eyes along with his head, though the corner of his chapped pink lips turn upwards. “As nice as it could be with the Empire.”

“That’s pretty nice.”

Cal and you huff a humorous puff of air in unison. 

“What were you doing before the Mantis?” Cal suddenly asked. 

“Oh,” you roll your eyes and wave your hand. “Not important. Don’t even worry about it.”

“Come on!” Cal shifts. 

“I’m serious!” you defend. “It’s boring stuff. You wouldn’t want to hear about it. Not as interesting as the force.”

“Well anything related to you is interesting,” Cal says casually, one of his palms lifting in the air for effect as he shifts again. 

Well that makes your face feel hot. Anything related to you is interesting. How often do people get to hear that? And how casually it comes out of Cal’s mouth, the shrug of his shoulders that you tie so easily to him, that’s how you know it’s honest. Not only have you heard something intimate that not many people will in their whole lives, but it was also heartfelt. 

“Yeah,” you mutter, though it sounds distant and far away as you watch Cal’s eyes. He doesn’t seem to mind. Then you snap back to reality. “This is gonna be good.”

Cal watches you pop to life, standing up entirely and running towards the water. BD-1 perks up as well to watch you just in time to see your much bigger form nearly knock the Latero over. And, much to Cal’s surprise, the little droid jumps from his lap and bounds after you. The red head decides he’s next to follow. 

“BD-1,” he rasps, also nearly pushing Greez to the ground. “Don’t touch the water!”

But it’s too late. However, nothing happens. BD-1 stands in the shallow waves, unelectrocuted and unbroken. He doesn’t spark a bit, only cocking his head in wonder at his friend. 

“Think fast!” a voice calls. 

A splash of warm and salty water slaps against Cal’s face. He cringes, turning his shoulders away on impact with a little gasp that makes his throat burn. “Hey!”

Another splash. 

Cal turns to you. You’re standing with your hands on either side of yourself, open and matching your smug and proud face. Your boots are still on, which can’t be comfortable given that they’re now submerged in water. BD-1 is on the back of your shoulders- something Cal thought was only between him and the droid. Apparently not. 

“What’s wrong, Cal? Can’t handle the current?”

Cal stills himself. Then he bends down himself and flicks water upwards. 

“Hey! No!”

He does it once more. 

“No!”

So you too repeat your original actions and begin forcing salty liquid up into the air in Cal’s direction as well. BD-1 grips onto your collar for stability while you both go to town, careful to not open your mouths too wide and taste the saltiness. 

“Be careful you two!” Cere calls from the shore. Neither Cal nor yourself heed her words, continuing on in disrupting the tide. 

“They’re fine,” Greez assures with the wave of one of his many arms. 

“Are you sure about that?” Cere responds with a hand on her hip as she watches you tackle the Jedi to the sandy terrain below the shallow water. 

“Completely fine.”

You push both of Cal’s shoulders down jokingly, careful not to subdue his head under the water. He cranes his neck to keep it above the waves. Through his soft lashes, Cal can just see your smiling, evil intentioned face with BD-1 on your shoulder gazing at him. 

Honestly, it feels just how it did last week- the last time you had watched Cal in his room. Gazing at him, admiring him. Just now you get to touch him, relax with him, splash water at him, even. You wish you could capture this moment if not forever, then for a while, and Cal wishes the same. 

* ✭ ˚ ･ﾟ ✧ *･ﾟ * ✭˚･ﾟ ✧* ･  *

Sorry it’s short. Idk if it’s my best work certainly but I haven’t written for Cal or Star Wars in a while. But I didn’t kill the reader in this fic or have someone sick or in danger! So it might be my first ever straight fluff? I don’t know. But what a good character to do it with. I’m glad to give Cal a break. And i hope the requester enjoys.