#the fact that my ‘*mine’ tag is on this list of most used? just above the gifs tag bc I made exactly one caps post?

[elisacifuentes]

I posted 3,024 times in 2022

That's 679 more posts than 2021!

130 posts created (4%)

2,894 posts reblogged (96%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@annasvinyl

@olgalenski

I tagged 2,861 of my posts in 2022

Only 5% of my posts had no tags

#movies - 261 posts

#stranger things - 190 posts

#polizeiruf rostock - 142 posts

#eurovision - 127 posts

#people - 120 posts

#house of the dragon - 119 posts

#star wars - 113 posts

#mine* - 111 posts

#gifs* - 110 posts

#katrin könig - 108 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#weil katrin. da muss ich dich enttäuschen der zug ist circa abgefahren. es mag keine große rolle gewesen sein aber es war auch nicht nichts

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

See the full post

61 notes - Posted May 26, 2022

#4

See the full post

61 notes - Posted April 30, 2022

#3

See the full post

87 notes - Posted February 10, 2022

#2

161 notes - Posted November 28, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

See the full post

211 notes - Posted January 31, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[uraichievents]

UraIchi Week 2024

Monday, July 1st, 2024 - Sunday, July 7th, 2024

AO3 Collection

Full Prompts List Submitted This Year

(Click images to enlarge. Alt text under the cut.)

What is UraIchi Week?

It’s a week-long fanworks event to promote the Urahara Kisuke x Kurosaki Ichigo ship. There’s no sign-up, it’s just for fun, and everybody can participate. Completed works and wips are both acceptable, and any type of fanwork (fanfic, fanart, gifsets, etc.) is welcome. NSFW and/or potentially trigger-y content is allowed, although please remember to tag your works properly.

The ship itself can be written romantically or platonically, as lovers or friends or even enemies, so long as it stars these two characters together in some way. Poly ships are also fine so long as Ichigo and Kisuke are still the focus of the fanwork. And crossovers and fusions are also allowed even if it isn’t one of the given prompts for the event. Basically, anything goes, and the only criteria is that it has to be UraIchi-centric.

Posting:

UraIchi Week is hosted here on Tumblr and on AO3. For posts on Tumblr, remember to ping @uraichievents and tag #UraIchi Week 2024. For AO3, you can add your work(s) to the collection linked up above. You are also welcome to join the UraIchi Discord server if you haven’t already and come and talk about what you’re working on!

Themes:

July 1st, Day 1: i've met you before / i'll meet you again / this is the first time we've met.. right?

Time Travel / Dimension Travel

Identity Porn / Hidden Identities

“I've suffered from traumatic dreams of my past lives since I was a child, and I'm just now realizing that coming up to a beautiful stranger who looks like someone I've seen die a thousand times in a thousand different ways at a bar and asking if we've met before sounds a lot like a come-on haha no wait come back that doesn't mean I'm not desperately attracted to you please kiss me again” AU

July 2nd, Day 2: It's fact that killable problems are not real problems.

Murder Husbands

Ichigo is Deadpool / unbreakable / any other accidentally immortal being who is really kind of annoyed about it (because it’s boring, and he’s still young enough to be within his lifespan, but it sure takes the fun out of fighting).

All the times Ichigo died, he ACTUALLY died, he just came back. Every time he comes back, he comes back Wronger.

July 3rd, Day 3: Things I Should've Told You / Things I Don't Tell Anyone Else

The skeletons in your closet are about to overflow. Would you like me to tidy it up?

Ichigo is experimenting with self-expression, a hobby, etc., making up for lost time as a regular teenager. Urahara is always the first one (sometimes only one) to see or hear about a new idea.

“The person I trust most is you.”

July 4th, Day 4: Sword and Shield

I am yours to command, use me as you please.

Shiba!Ichigo and Second Division!Kisuke

Summoner/Mage AU: Paired summons who are good apart but unmatched together.

July 5th, Day 5: That One is Mine

Hollow Instincts / Feral Protective

Possessive!Kisuke: He stepped aside for Sui-Feng because Yoruichi was always master first and friend second and love interest never, and because Yoruichi wanted her in a way she's never wanted him. But Ichigo is different, and everyone soon realizes that when Kisuke truly wants something, he always gets it in the end.

“Death can’t have you. You’re mine.”

July 6th, Day 6: Monsters come in all shapes and sizes. Some are born, some are made, and some decide being a monster's pretty fucking cool.

Visored!Urahara Kisuke AU / Vasto Lorde!Kurosaki Ichigo AU

“Ichigo forges a friendship with his Hollow in the Shattered Shaft” AU

vs. Gotei 13 AU: Ichigo time travels back from a future where he was chained to the throne as the next Soul King by the Shinigami.

July 7th, Day 7: Creator’s Choice!

As always, the above prompts are all optional, and you’re free to come with your own ideas. You can also find an excel sheet with all the prompts submitted this year linked up above, so feel free to look through that if you want, and you can also make a copy for yourself.

And that’s it! We’re looking forward to what everyone comes up with!

[comikadraws]

Was the curse of hatred actually a real thing? or did danzo just demonize the uchiha;s anger? idk, being murderously angry or just angry in general is a reasonable and human response to oppression and genocide.

The "Curse of Hatred" Analysis

An interesting question. The Curse of Hatred looks dumb at first glance but there are also many misconceptions surrounding it.

Since it is such a hot mess to begin with, I will try to focus mostly on the in-universe canon and lore rather than making it even more complicated by bringing in too much real-world logic and criticizing Kishimoto.

There's a bunch of rambling in the tags though.

Kishimoto's Intentions

Whenever we talk about the "Curse of Hatred" the fandom will usually apply terms such as "racism", "bigotry" and "pseudoscience" - particularly in reference to Tobirama.

Again, I don't want to bring too much irl logic into this but I feel like we need to make a clear distinction between intention and interpretation over here. "[insert character] was a racist" and "the Uchiha were justified" is a valid interpretation of the story. But at the same time, I doubt that this was ever intended by Kishimoto.

I have talked about this at length in another post of mine, in which I analyzed Kishimoto's most likely intent and how exactly this information is relevant to us with a look at authorial intent in fiction. But the TL;DR version is that Japan is not exactly very sensitized to themes of racism and the "Curse of Hatred" is never framed as racist propaganda but exposition only. The lore also lines up with Kishimoto's personal views on how grudges are responsible for war (instead of corruption or racism) and the Uchiha's curse might be a metaphor for that.

In other words, the Curse of Hatred is real in canon. Even if it's a massive red flag and deserves to be criticized.

What Is The "Curse of Hatred" Even?

I have to admit, it's been a while since the last time I watched Naruto from start to finish, so I had to use the sources listed by the wiki rather than relying on my own findings and I might be biased. Because of that, I'd prefer everybody to regard my findings as headcanon or interpretation (especially further toward the end) rather than undisputed fact.

As far as I remember, the exact wording "Curse of Hatred" is only ever used by Obito. While not using the same wording, the curse is also referenced by Itachi, Hagoromo, and Tobirama who each have their own understanding of it. Unfortunately, we have no idea where exactly this wording or concept originated and we have no idea what exactly causes the Curse of Hatred that Obito refers to.

Hiruzen, Koharu, Homura, and even Danzo, while potentially influenced by Tobirama's teachings, do not reference the Curse of Hatred at all, at least not in relation to the Uchiha Clan itself.

Now here's the first one of my findings: The Curse of Hatred is supposed to be some sort of involuntary biological or cultural inclination causing Uchihas to become consumed by hatred but it is also something voluntary - a Nindo. While the former could be considered a "curse" in the traditional sense, the latter is definitely not.

For the Nindo, it is supposed to be some sort of antithesis to the Will of Fire. Because of that, it is not limited to the Uchiha but, according to Tobirama and Obito, closely associated. As explained later on in this post, most Uchihas do not follow this Nindo.

Core aspects of the Curse of Hatred as a Nindo:

Valuing a precious few above the many

Directing your hatred at those who took away your precious few

Growing stronger from those feelings of hatred (for the Uchiha, reflected in the form of the Sharingan)

A Biological Inclination?

Now back to Tobirama's theory, due to the narrative framing, we will assume his words to be truthful for the sake of this analysis. However, I will provide links to other people's posts delving into the fantasy racism discussion.

Tobirama is racist and his theories cannot be trusted.

Tobirama is not racist and there is validity to his theories.

I myself do not completely agree with either of these, but they might be interesting reads for you. If you do not agree with either of them, please keep it to yourself and do not bother the original creators.

Tobirama's theory goes as follows:

The Uchiha feel love and hate more strongly than other individuals

The strength of the Sharingan and the Uchihas' hatred are correlated

In a fit of hatred, odds are an Uchiha will commit evil

It is nowhere mentioned that the Uchiha are more likely to feel hate - only that their hatred is worse than the average person's and puts them at risk of being swayed by hateful ideologies.

A Cultural Inclination?

Aside from Tobirama's theory, multiple characters comment on the historical origin behind the Curse of Hatred.

We are talking, of course, about Indra. Obito explains that Indra's values and his hatred (particularly what later became the Nindo of the Curse of Hatred) were passed down to his descendants - the Uchiha clan. Tobirama's exposition implies the same thing.

Tobirama states that there "used to be a thought that [...] the basis of the Uchiha clan's strength was the power of their jutsu". It is very similar to Hagorormo's description of his son.

If this is correct, that would mean that the importance placed on powerful jutsu by the Uchiha Clan does inadvertently promote hatred due to the close correlation between hatred and the Sharingan.

But then again, in the story, it is shown that many Uchiha were not particularly fond of perpetuating hate and it is also implied that to avoid hatred, they sealed their emotions away. My interpretation is that they recognized the pain that hate could cause and then took steps to avoid it.

The Reincarnation Cycle

Sticking with Indra, another explanation that is frequently brought up is Indra's and Ashura's reincarnation cycle, which has also been described as curse-like or haunting and neverending. A fate seemingly set in stone.

There is not much more to say, other than that this theory suggests that Indra's reincarnates are just naturally inclined towards lusting for power.

The True Origin

Now, here's another thing that's constantly being overlooked. Aside from Obito's exposition in chapter 462 on the Curse of Hatred Nindo, Tobirama's exposition in chapter 619 on the Uchiha's tendency to follow said Nindo, and even Hagoromo's exposition on the reincarnation cycle in chapter 670, we get a vital piece of exposition in chapter 681.

Ladies, gentlemen, and anything in between. May I introduce to you...

...the real Curse of Hatred.

Or at the very least what I believe is the real reason why the "Curse of Hatred" exists in the world of Naruto.

From the very beginning, Zetsu approached Indra to take advantage of his hatred and turn it into a tool for his own purposes. He then did that again and again. He focused on the Uchiha in particular - Either because of the previously mentioned reasons (i.e. the Uchiha / incarnates have a tendency to become obsessed with hatred and power) or because the Uchiha were otherwise easy to take advantage of / manipulate (through Hagoromo's stone tablet that was left in the Uchihas' possession, an ill reputation thanks to Indra's / their ancestors' actions, etc).

In order to achieve his goal (awakening a Rinnegan), he had to somehow combine both Indra's and Ashura's power. It is implied that for this purpose, he instigated, perpetuated, and escalated wars and conflicts between Senju and Uchiha by pitting their reincarnates against each other. But unlike the wars he caused, Zetsu went unnoticed by the history books. Basically, he kept haunting the clans like a curse.

And without a doubt, had Zetsu never been there, 99% of the Uchihas' problems would not exist - regardless of what ideals, genes, or history the Uchiha hold. Indra's declaration of war, centuries of conflict, Madara's defection, Obito losing Rin, the Kyubi attack, the Uchiha massacre, Sasuke's defection, the 4th Great Shinobi War. All of these were directly caused by Zetsu or set off by a resulting chain reaction.

You could even think this further. Assuming the Uchiha clan really came across as "cursed", perhaps Tobirama's, Obito's, Hagoromo's and everybody else's explanations were just desperate attempts to make sense of anything. They didn't know that Zetsu was pulling the strings, so perhaps they tried to explain the Uchiha Clan's history in some other way. One that made sense without that missing variable.

What is actually going on here is, of course, uncertain. There are basically no definitive explanations on the matter and right now it looks like all of the above could be true and at the same time none.

[various-spirit-animals-brackets]

How I'm thinking it's going to work (for now, subject to change):

General:

THIS BRACKET IS NOT ABOUT WHICH CHARACTER IS THE MOST MORALLY GOOD! MORALLY SHITTY CHARACTERS CAN STILL BE WELL-WRITTEN AND INTERESTING, WHICH IS WHAT MAKES A CHARACTER A GOOD CHARACTER. I just want everyone to understand that going in.

I am doing my best to collect every single canon character in this entire series. I will release the full list soon. Having said that, I am only human. It's possible I'll miss someone. If you have an attachment to a very minor character that I happen to miss, send me an ask, either to here, or to my main @dark-night-star-light. Anon asks are always on!

You can only submit canon characters. No OCs allowed, sorry. But you can submit a canon character regardless of how irrelevant or minor they are.

Voter fraud* and bribery** are not allowed. I know, I know, other fandoms allow them. I'm not, because the small-scale size of this fandom means that could actually make a dent in our results. I won't actually know if you do it, but if I find out you did, your vote will be eliminated.

This is meant to be fun! Try not to get too butthurt if your fav gets eliminated in the first round. I know a few of mine will, since they're such minor characters.

The unique tag is #best spirit animals character 2024. So if you want to participate, but don’t follow this blog, you need to be checking that a lot. Everything will be also tagged #spirit animals, #spirit animals books, and #spirit animals series. If you want to campaign, I recommend using the unique tag.

If you have any questions, or disagree with a rule and want to take it up with me, both my asks and DMs are open, both here and on my main.

Propaganda:

I am allowing propaganda. I am going to put it to a vote whether to allow anti-propaganda or not. Stay tuned for that.

I have still not created the full list of characters yet. That may take a while. In the mean time, you may start to submit propaganda to me. Ask box is open!

I will accept your propaganda if you make it about a ship (ex: Vote Shane, he’s so in love with Abeke!!!), but I don’t recommend it. In fact, I discourage it. But it’s allowed.

You can submit headcanons about a character as propaganda. Propaganda doesn't have to have any basis in canon (giving the more minor characters a fighting chance).

You are not allowed to submit links to analysis posts (or any kind of post) as propaganda, even if it's yours. Everything submitted needs to be something you wrote specifically for the bracket. If you send me a link to a post, it's an automatic delete.

Other than the above, there are no restrictions on what can be submitted as propaganda. It can be as short or as long as you want and as serious or ridiculous as you want (you could literally submit, like, "Vote for Rollan, he's so funny and he needs a hug" as propaganda and I would accept it, or you can go deep and start talking about his parallels and arc and motifs and backstory and personality and hardcore analysis stuff, and that would also be fine).

If you're unsure what to write, I'm going to release a piece of Shane propaganda I'm writing soon. Hopefully it inspires you. But again, there are no restrictions! Your propaganda doesn't have to resemble mine.

If I allow anti-propaganda, there will definitely be restrictions. More on that later.

If multiple people submit propaganda for the same character, I'm keeping them all. My goal is to have most characters have at least one piece of propaganda, so in the interest of that, as we approach the beginning of the tournament, I'll make a list of every character with how many pieces of propaganda each currently has. This is so that if a character has no propaganda, it would be a warning to everyone that it's your last chance to submit for them.

Propaganda is submitted through asks or DMs! You can submit for as many characters as you want. You will be allowed to be anonymous or not. If you choose not to be anonymous, you're signing up to be tagged in the poll that features the character you submitted for. So be aware of that. I may decide to open up a Google Form if I'm not getting any submissions. But we'll take it as it comes.

You will be allowed to submit propaganda throughout the tournament! If you decide to submit propaganda during the tournament, it will be added in the next round. Unless the character gets eliminated, in which case it won't be added at all.

This isn't really a propaganda thing, but it's propaganda-adjacent: campaigning. Campaigning is 100% allowed. There are no restrictions on campaigning except "Don't be rude". You will be allowed to campaign, and light-heartedly bash your vote's opponent (just make sure it doesn't get out of hand). You're allowed to spam the main tag or the poll with "Vote for [character]!" posts and reblogs. You're allowed to send people asks begging them to vote for [character]. In the end, it's their choice, but you can campaign as hard as you want. In fact, if you go into a poll and don't immediately know who to choose, because you like or dislike both characters equally, I recommend not voting for a while. The campaigners may be able to sway you to one side or the other.

I will submit propaganda for multiple characters. I may or may not choose to credit myself, it all depends! I will definitely be campaigning for some characters. Hopefully, this will encourage other people to campaign, too. That's half the fun of best character brackets.

Format stuff:

There may or may not be comeback rounds. It all just depends on where we're at and if I need characters to come back to create an even number. Don't count on them, but don't count them out, either.

It seems some people here haven't read the entire series, but I would still like them to be allowed to participate fully. So, I'm going to put an official description for every character, maybe a sentence or so long. This is meant to be objective, canon, and not propaganda (ex: Rollan is the Amayan Hero of Erdas that summoned Essix the Falcon).

Every poll will last one day, then we'll move onto the next for the next day and so on.

There will be preliminaries, because or else we are just going to have too many polls. The preliminaries will cut out the majority of the characters, probably including mostly minor characters.

I'm going to do my best to save the polls I feel will divide the fandom for last. So we won't see any Rollan vs. Meilin polls right off the bat. This might make the first few polls boring, but it'll get more interesting later on. Trust.

*Voter fraud is enlisting non-fandom mutuals or friends to vote for your fav, or voting from two different accounts. (Like I accidentally did in the interest poll. Whoopsie. I promise it won't happen in the real polls!) If you happen to do this by accident like I did, tell me and I will remove the extra vote(s) and you will not be penalized.

**Bribery is where you go to someone, either within the fandom or not, and offer to draw or write something for them (or do some other favor) if they vote for the character you want.

[uroboros-if]

Whats your advice for other wip ifs on tumblr? Ive got my intro post and everything but it seems like no one is seeing it :(

🥹😭 I'm flattered you think I'm qualified to answer this, especially as I don't consider myself wildly popular or anything! I wouldn't call myself an expert on this, but I'll tell you what I know:

Tumblr's tagging system / Discoverability

Make sure you're searchable! If your blog is too young, or if you have links in your post, or too many pictures, etc. etc. anything can trigger Tumblr's alarm bells. What this means is that your post won't show up in the tags, aka won't be shown when people search it up. Here is a post about actions you can take to prevent it and another one here. Generally you want your blog to be older than 2 weeks, and to be posting a few times on it before it gets any searchability. (This sideblog used to be an old fanfic blog that I've repurposed for the IF for this exact reason!). If you'd like, copy and paste your intro post, and re-post it (if you don't mind losing too many notes on it), or you can just experiment with another post. Tag it with the appropriate tags, and then wait 2-3 minutes before searching Recent posts on the tag (like #interactive fiction). If you don't see it, your posts aren't showing up!

Make sure you're tagging your post. Bigger one of them, I think, is #interactive fiction (since that unifies CS, Twine and visual novels together). You can, however, add things like #twine/#choicescript, #twine fiction, etc... Any tags you personally might use to search posts up. Just make sure people can see your post in the first place with the first bullet above!

Timing. For whatever reason, I get a good amount of traffic around 9PM Pacific time/5-7AM in Europe (UK to Greece)/12-2PM Eastern Asia (Philippines to Sydney, Australia). I have friends from those places, so I memorized the time difference. For reference, this is 4PM UTC time. My guess is that Europeans are waking up a couple of hours around that time, and some Americans and Asians/Australians are active around that time as well. You should experiment with timing with your posts!

Submit your post to Interact-IF. I got more notes when I submitted mine through their blog! They have a page called, "Are you an IF author looking to promote your project?" and they'll put yours through the queue. Here's the link!

Formatting

Make sure your post is eye-catching, and a pleasure to read. I think what catches the eye is

A header and a title. Find a header that conveys your IF's atmosphere/mood/vibes/aesthetic. Then as far as making it a pleasure, make sure the text guides the eye smoothly. This means:

Organizing your post logically. Synopsis->features->characters makes the most sense to me, as these are the top things people look for besides the characters, which you have to contextualize before you introduce them! You can also...

Mix up formatting--synopsis can be a wall of text, then features can be a list format, and then characters can be a list in prose format, etc.

You may also include breaks, like using a header or line with a title to signal a new section, e.g. the start of the Synopsis, the start of Characters, etc.

Just don't make it hard to read for whatever reason! Your goal is to make the process of learning about your IF digestible and smooth.

In fact, I made a point to make this post itself as a teaching lesson! It could have all been a wall of text, in paragraph/prose form, but it isn't. I organized the sections in a logical sequence, titled them and grouped them, and used a generous amount of formatting available to me (but not too much to hurt the eye).

Intro Writing

Just to discuss certain sections you should pay particular attention to, and what you may want to include in them!

Check for errors. Minimize any typos, grammatical errors, etc. It's totally fine if you're a beginner writer! Just make sure it's polished, lest it may disrupt the flow of reading.

Write an interesting synopsis. Your idea could be the best, but you need to put real thought into how you introduce it to other people! For me, I read other people's synopses for inspiration. You generally want to a) describe who your MC is, b) describe the setting, c) "Everything used to be..." d) "... Until the fire nation attacked!" -- meaning, describe how life used to be for the MC, and what threw all that off-balance, hence revealing the conflict of the plot or the disruption in the story. You can make this section show your writing abilities, but I constrained myself to shortening mine as much as possible (digestibility).

Features. Again, look at other intro posts! Outline what can be customized about your MC (appearance, personality, sexuality, etc.), a brief mention of the ROs (without names) that can be romanced if there are any, cool features your IF may have (a codex, a dice rolling system), a sneak peek into what readers may expect to do in the story, and more!

ROs!! You'll want to tap into what personally inclines you to liking an RO right away, and include that. You can make this section as detailed as you want to be or as brief but effective. Some include character appearances, some don't. All of them mention who they are in the story, and a description of what they are like. Maybe you can hint at their deeper, individual character subplot! Hitting upon keywords of certain archetypes as well may make it easier for the reader to go, "Ah, so this is the X character," in the story. Leaning on tropes a little isn't bad, especially to play it up for the audience to know "this is the cold one, this is the flirty one, etc." so long as your characters aren't merely their trope.

Your Story

Did you notice this is the last thing I'm discussing? Before you change your actual story, you want to make sure you've considered every reason why your intro post isn't very public, which may have NOTHING to do with how interesting or appealing your story is. Think of it like chess--the last thing you want to do is move your king. It's also just simply harder and disheartening to change the vision of your story.

In fact, the vast majority of things covered here are only points to consider, rather than things to actually change.

Do you have a demo? People want demos before investing into a story! a) They want to know if they will like your writing at all, b) demos give a good look into what they may expect from the story overall, and c) it's more promising for an IF to have one, as far as actually finishing the story!

And if you do have a demo, is it polished? Is it short? Does it actually introduce the conflict or any of the characters people are interested in? Does it look good?

Who really is your target audience? Your story is probably written for yourself, but you may want to understand what generally appeals to people. You can't please everyone, hence mainly appealing to a certain audience. If your story is high-fantasy, people want you to mention all the fantastical things your MC can do, see or experience in your story! If your IF is a revenge story, make the MC feel dangerous, and capable of exacting their plans. Mention everything people would WANT to know about your brand of story.

What's the gender ratio of your ROs? The fact that your story may be exclusively/vastly heterosexual, or your story may specifically be a wlw or nlw/mlm or nlm story may influence how much reach it has. I hate to say it, but IFs with mainly male characters are in abundance compared to female interests. However, this doesn't mean you should change your ROs, especially if you intend the story to be heterosexual/lesbian/gay--this is just a factor to consider.

Consider other factors. Does your story have any actual romance? (People really like romance.) Is it only going to be short? (People like long stories generally.) Are you using Twine or CS? (Most people like both, some may have a preference. I almost exclusively read Twine.) Will it feature very disturbing content? (If it does, it may appeal only to certain people).

Closing Thoughts

I am flattered you asked for advice, so I took the time to exhaust everything I know! Of course, again, I am no authority or expert on the subject, so do with this as you will. Either way, I'm happy you asked ! 🥹💕 Thanks for asking!

P.S. If you want, my messages are open on my personal blog! You can send me a DM if you want feedback or an opinion :)

[carlos-in-glasses]

Fic Rec Friday Fun

Thank you for the tag @irispurpurea @reyesstrand @rosedavid @strandnreyes @iboatedhere @chicgeekgirl89 @catanisspicy - you're all so fantastic and I need to catch up on the ones in your lists I haven't read yet! A treat for me 🥰

So wanted to get some hiatus rec lists going and encourage some self promo in my friends so how about sharing your top fics no matter how big or small - give us the links to your wonderful words with the Most hits/Most kudos/Most comments/Most bookmarks /Most words/Least words

For me the above means it would only be split between two fics and then a third for least words, so I'm going for the next-most for comments and bookmarks.

Most Hits: When Soulmates Swim - Sparks and splashes fly when TK and Carlos each take up swimming while they recover from workplace injuries. I'm going to go ahead and say this is probably the funniest fic I've written based on feedback! There's angst of course but also TK and Carlos bring out each other's fun side and I'm so happy with it because of that.

Most Kudos: Chasers - A 3x13 coda. While TK is alone with Cooper, Carlos is alone with his thoughts. Both recall times they’ve chased the next high, other men, or each other. When Carlos arrives home, TK still has something important to say – and it's something he didn’t tell Cooper. I'm amazed and so grateful for the love on this one-shot. I loved delving into their backstories and featuring Alex who, fun fact, is based on my ex-boyfriend lol. Not me mining my most painful memories and emotions for content! ANYWAY this Cooper is in my current WIP so he'll be back soon...! Also Carlos goes for a swim and it's where the idea for the gym pool in When Soulmates Swim originated.

Most Comments: The Heart Behind the Shield - Bad Call (2x08) meets Abandoned (4x04) when TK and Carlos attempt to understand what they’ve been through and realize certain old wounds are bleeding into the new. They have both been held captive, faced death, made it home. Secrets, moods, hot messes – they love each other more every day. And they both still need their parents. I'd wanted to write a 2x08 coda for ages but couldn't figure out my angle until 4x04 came along with such blessed parallels. Like Chasers this also goes into backstory and I'm really happy with how those parts came out. Also just want to say that this has a particular scene between Carlos and Gabriel, which I'm very glad I wrote given what happens in 4x17.

Most Bookmarks: The Ruins of Wonderland - A divergence/re-imagining of Carlos and TK getting back together after their breakup. The severe winter storm doesn’t happen as forecast and Austin receives a manageable snowfall – without TK plunging into a frozen lake. Nancy’s 126 hang goes ahead. TK attends, but so does Carlos… This wasn't the first story I wrote/posted, but it's the first idea for a Tarlos fic I had and I have such a soft-spot for it. Important features: bed-breaking sex, slipper socks and a giant pretzel.

Most Words: When Soulmates Swim - 53k. The next is The Heart Behind the Shield at 34.4k. My longest one-shot is Man to Man at 14.6k.

Least Words: The Light of Our Life - 2.4k. After an awkward conversation, Carlos buys TK a bearded dragon and fears it may be a parting gift (Coda for 4x12). I took a long lunchbreak, wrote this, and posted it the same day. I've never done that before or since, and I honestly don't understand what happened to me...

I'm a little late for this so apologies if you've already done it and I haven't seen, but if not and you want to share, I'm tagging: @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut @heartstringsduet @paperstorm @goodways @bonheur-cafe @lightningboltreader @chaotictarlos @theghostofashton @bubblesandroses8 @noxsoulmate @freneticfloetry @taralaurel @never-blooms @ladytessa74 @lemonlyman-dotcom ❤️ 🧡 💛 💚 💙 💜

[late-to-the-party-81]

Diamonds and Ice

AN: This is my entry for The Slumber Party’s week one Writer activity ‘I Spy’. I chose to use ‘Diamond Necklace’. I even managed a drabble!

Beta's by @lunarbuck Dividers by @firefly-graphicsgraphics and moodboard/banners by me. 

Summary: You consider the meaning of the gift you’ve just received.

Relationship: Dark Mob Loki x Reader

WC: Under 500

CW: Angst, Non-con, manipulation.

What is a diamond necklace?

A symbol of eternal and endless love? A way of announcing to the world that ‘I love you above all others’. Tangible proof that you are priceless?

Or are there other meanings? A replacement for a collar and chain? Telling others they can look, but not touch, for this person is my possession? A reminder that you can never escape?

Really it all comes down to the person giving it to you, and what your relationship is like. 

It may be that, in the beginning, such a gift would have meant all those initial things, back when love was new and you saw the world and your lover, through rose-tinted spectacles.

“You are the most precious thing in the world to me, dove. I wake up every day in awe of the fact that you could love someone like me.”

You wound your arms around his neck and pressed a kiss to his lips, enjoying the feel of his hands on your hips.

“You’re so silly, Loki. Of course you are deserving of love.”

But then the tint starts to wear off.

“Where were you, Loki? I was waiting for you.”

He glanced up at you, cleaning his hands with a rag. You tried not to look so hard at what he was cleaning off. Rust red.

“You know I had business, darling. I can’t always be here with you.”

Before disappearing altogether.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

His words come out as a snarl and his long fingers, fingers that used to take you to the heights of pleasure, were wrapped around your wrist in a punishing grip.

“Anywhere away from you. You’re never here anymore, stand me up more often than not. You’re angry all the time. I’m sorry, Loki. You’re not the man I fell in love with anymore.”

But what if your lover tries to apply a new tint?

His grip was tight on your jaw, but the discomfort from that was nothing compared to the pain in your shoulders and wrists, where your arms were bound above you to the headboard.

“You. Will. Love. Me.” Each word was punctuated with a harsh, punishing thrust. “You are mine, dove. And I keep what is mine.”

A tear rolled down your face.

Well, again, that depends on whether you accept the new tint and behave as though outwardly it’s the same as the original.

Your jaw ached, but this time from smiling. You rested your head on Loki’s shoulder, a picture of a woman smitten with her man.

“Isn’t he just the best? I can’t believe he bought this for me.” You almost believe yourself.

Your fingers trailed over the gems adorning your throat, almost as heavy and suffocating as your husband’s fingers.

“Well, you know how much you mean to me, darling.”

His fingers tighten on your waist.

What is a diamond necklace?

Cold.

Tag list: @jobean12-blog @tuiccim @yarnforbrains @flordeamatista @goldylions @krissy25 @bodeckersdiamonddoll @doasyoudesireandlive @wheezy-stucky @luxeavenger @peaches1958 @mrsmischief209 @animnerd @strangeprincex

[x-heesy]

Etwas in eigener Sache:

Seit ca 9/2022 läuft mein Blog nur mehr spärlich

Und mir kommt es so vor, als wäre ich in einer von euren dubiosen eingeschränkter User rechte Kategorien

Damals hatte ich viel viel viel mehr Traffic

Vor allem die reblogs von außerhalb sind fast null

Ich glaube nicht das ich mir das nur einbilde

Direkte Suchanfragen via der internen Suchfunktion, rennen

Jedoch werde ich schlichtweg nicht mehr von Euch featured....

Meine Geliebten Follower interagieren noch gleich 💞

Eigentlich solle es auch In eurem Interesse sein, Kunst Blogs wie den Meinige zu fördern, sprich in den Dashboard Vorschlägen wieder zu erscheinen...

Vor allem seid Ihr zigtausende (Kunst) blogs weggeekelt habt

Ich hatte früher über Nacht ca 100-600 Notifikationen! Jetzt kann ich mich freuen, wenn es hundert sind

Ihr seid natürlich nicht für jede Ungerechtigkeit verantwortlich

Nur wissen wir alle, wie Eure Schikanen der letzten Jahre abliefen und bis heute tagtäglich von uns zu ertragen sind

BTW

Auch das meine, mir sehr wichtigen hashtags Liste & Vorschläge einfach deaktiviert wurden ist eine Zumutung

Ohne clipboard & Sonstigen text Ersetzung tools wäre das korrekte tagging unmöglich

Die meisten Platformen wollen User freundlich programmieren - Ihr macht es uns von Beginn an nur schwerer in jedem Belangen

Ich mache das nicht wegen fame sonder weil ich unterhalte gerne meine Mitmenschen, bringe sie zum Staunen grübeln und ein bisschen zum Gruseln 👻

Jedoch macht mir das mit mehr Traffic viel mehr spass

Ich erbitte Prüfung meiner Account Einstellungen

Dankeschön

Lieben Gruß

Alex

—— @staff

Something on my own behalf

Since around 9/2022 my blog has only been running sparsely

And I feel like I'm in one of your dubious restricted user rights categories

Back then I had much, much, much more traffic

Above all, the reblogs from outside are almost zero

I don't think I'm just imagining it

Direct search queries via the internal search function, run

However, I will simply no longer be featured by you...

My beloved followers are still interacting 💞

Actually, it should also be in your interest to promote art blogs like mine, i.e. to appear in the dashboard suggestions again...

Above all, you have disgusted away tens of thousands of (art) blogs

I used to have around 100-600 notifications overnight! Now I can be happy if there are a hundred

Of course you are not responsible for every injustice

But we all know what your harassment has been like over the last few years and what we have to endure every day to this day

BTW

The fact that my hashtags list and suggestions, which are very important to me, were simply deactivated is an impertinence

Without clipboard & other text replacement tools, correct tagging would NOT be impossible

Most platforms want to program in a user-friendly way - you just make it harder for us in every situation

I don't do this for fame, but because I like to entertain my fellow human beings, make them wonder, ponder and a little creepy 👻

I spending a couple of hours each day since 2011

However, I find it much more fun with more traffic

I request that my account settings be checked

Thank you very much

Kind regards

Alex

New World by Zap Mama

#maybeiamadreamerbutiamnottheonlyone

[runner-owen]

So I wrote the gender euphoria scene in my WIP today! Let me know what you think! It's a first draft so please keep than in mind when you read.

Context: my trans man protagonist Owen lives in a Victorian inspired world where trans people are common and accepted by most, so common there isn't a specific term for them. He's cleaning himself off in front of a mirror and thinks, happily, about himself and the world he lives in. Transphobia is mentioned and countered.

Let me know if you'd like to be added to my tag list!

As the water bowl filled, I moved to undress. Many preferred to bathe with their night clothes on, to keep away the chill, but I was no stranger to the cold. In fact, I even felt invigorated by it. So off went the cap, off went the shift, off went the socks I’d neglected to remove the night before.

Within the grand full sized mirror, I examined myself, my legs, my arms, and smiled. The cloth I found in the cabinet above the sink would do just fine for my purposes. It took the water with ease, and I smoothed it over my skin.

This body of mine, I’d worked so hard to perfect, and it was mine. It had always been mine, but now it felt as if it truly belonged to me and me alone. My muscles, dense and lean, shifted away from the softness they’d been before in my arms and stomach. My legs powerful. My hips sturdy. My breasts all but vanished, all but ghosts where once they’d haunted me during my first puberty. And as I ran my cloth over my cheeks and chin, I felt hair pricking up beneath the surface. Whiskers! In scarce months, I could grow my own beard! What I would look like with one, I could hardly imagine. But I’d had trouble imagining what my wondrous body could look like, would look like, when I began my potions four years ago.

I could not, cannot, imagine the minds of those who view us of second puberty as if we were diseased in the mind. As if we were secretly all miserable, and only their knowledge would save our pathetic hearts from ourselves, if we weren’t so stubborn about it. But they are the miserable, pathetic, stubborn, selfish ones. How can any look upon our faces and see anything less than joy? How can they look at us and think we need their cure? I’d sooner drink the serpent poison they sell in the traveling patent carts than return to femininity. Any that chose to do so, I wish them all happiness and satisfaction and protection from the toxic souls that wander our society. And as for those toxic souls, those papered brutes that claim we are misguided and have been failed by society, I say they can eat lead paint - and I have, in the papers and to their faces!

[recurring-polynya]

go places addenda

Earlier this week, I finished posting go places, a 28k fanfic about Rukia and Renji getting ready to go take their Academy entrance exams. I started this story in 2019. It sat in a hot mess amongst my WIPs, and nevertheless informed a lot of flashbacks and memories that show up in various parts of my The Heart is a Muscle series. I made reference to a number of these throughout the writing, which my beautiful beta reader @diademchiofthetripod said worked fine as “textual ruins”, but I thought someone out there might be interested in actually finding the cross-references.

Additionally, this story contained a lot of world-building, just *bags* of worldbuilding, much of which started life as, or was inspired by various Tumblr posts, and I wanted to link those, too. Some of them are mine, but many came from other wonderful, thoughtful people, or came from us riffing off each other’s ideas. I am always grateful to the community on this website, and I just wanted to give credit to all the goofin’ around over here that inspires and informs my writing.

[cut for spoilers and also length]

Chapter 1

Settings are deeply important to me, and I felt like if I was going to set this entire thing in District 70, it deserved a name. Shiotsuka, 塩塚, means “salt mound,” because I wanted to invoke the imagery of barriers, like a town that sees itself as the last bastion of civilization, despite the fact that there are ten more districts to the south, including the home our protagonists have just left. In some ways, they are correct, though: Shiotsuka has the last post office on the South Road, the last shinigami recruitment station. I think all the ends-in-zero districts try to associate themselves with the ten above rather than the ten below. I realize this sort of thing is important mostly to me, but it sets the tone of the story as Rukia struggles to hold on to what she knows and who she is against the overwhelming message to focus her eyes onward and upward.

Mr. Mochida has been part of this story from the beginning. In fact, the opening scene of the original version was from his POV. I think that if I had started the story fresh in 2023, he would have been a very different character, but he was already *there*, and it didn’t feel right to replace him, which turned out to be a very good decision, actually. The actual point of this note is that I named him back before I got really into custom, bespoke character names, so it is likely that his name came from the Wikipedia list of Japanese Olympic weightlifters or something like that. I honestly don’t remember. It is a fairly common Japanese surname and, written 持田, means “hold or have” and “rice field.” An ordinary name for an ordinary sort of guy.

The bit about watered-down soy sauce came out of this post where I was wondering why they even had 55-gallon oil drums in Inuzuri and @bleachbleachbleach came up with a nicer answer than mine (which was Squad 12 toxic waste, although I am still fond of @snurtle 's idea from the tags that Rukia and Renji have glow-in-the-dark bones)

Chapter 2

The main reason there are couriers in this story is very simple: I have been re-reading Naomi Novik’s Temeraire series, and I got obsessed with the couriers and wanted some couriers. I realize that there is already the Secret Remote Squad, which is the subdivision of the Onmitsukidou that wears those rectangular hats and delivers messages around town. You know, these guys:

I wanted something tonally different though--a set of shinigami that spend most of their time outside of the Seireitei. Their job is important, but they’re more independent and a bit casual, and I liked the idea of this being one of Renji and Rukia’s first exposures to a shinigami-on-the-job (versus most of the introductions Kubo likes to do, where a character gets a Hollow dramatically slain right in front of them).

In my years of reading Bleach fanfic, I have decided that I do not care for it when people use flash step to travel long distances. This is a personal opinion, please do as you like in your own fanfics, but I just don’t think flash step should work that way. For one thing, my impression is that it basically involves doing a spatial shift from one place to another, which would seem to carry a heavy risk of running into things (or people). Also, it seems like it should take a lot of energy. Also, there are some characters (Hanataro) who can’t use it, which seems like it would cause a lot of problems. That being said, flash step is allegedly a set of techniques within hohou (we just never learn what any of the other ones are). I had some fun making up some that are practical for long-distance, which was both fun and satisfying for me. Ryuupo is written 流歩, where the first character , which means "flow", is also used in the word for jet stream, and then the second character is the same one for “step” that’s used in “flash step.” Hayaashi, 速歩, means “brisk walk” but it’s also the word used for a horse’s trotting gait. I do not actually speak Japanese. I did my best.

Relatedly, I also liked the idea of Mr. Mochida teaching Rukia and Renji a lot of practical, but not flashy stuff, and in particular, things that take lots and lots and lots of practice, but have a great deal of payoff. Unlike some people, who try to teach a kid bankai in three days, he’s more of a “strong foundations” sort of guy. I hope it’s obvious (particularly you’ve read my later stories featuring Renji in sensei-mode) that Renji is imprinting on this guy like a baby duck.

The Seireitei Bulletin makes an appearance, in part because I wanted to make a vague reference to my headcanon that Tousen personally transformed it from a propaganda rag into…um…something more closely resembling a news outlet. I also wanted to drop some hint of some big doings in the city that the reader would recognize, but would, of course, be basically meaningless to Rukia. It is actually right around the time Byakuya became captain, but that was a little too…too. However, Gin also became captain around the same time and you know I never miss an opportunity to do a shout-out to Iba’s mom.

Rukia contemplating a life in the Onmitsukidou is partially a Between Tides joke, but it’s mostly a reference to a Hisana-joins-Squad 2-and-then-adopts-Rukia-herself AU that @alopexplasma and I improv’ed our way to in the comments of section of Call Me Back When the War is Over.

Watanabe Yuuto is one of my Inuzuri irregulars; he also featured in the story Renji tells Chad about Rukia vs. the Bees, which is the next-to-last scene of Chapter 5 of See You on the Other Side.

Renji tells the story about Rukia wrestling the tanuki (or badger) to Byakuya in Chapter 11 of Call Me Back When the War is Over. It’s the second scene down and can be read independently of the rest of the story. Towards the end of the same chapter, Rukia clarifies that it was a badger (definitely not a tanuki).

Chapter 3

Rukia’s bunny print yukata makes two appearances in Call Me Back, once in Chapter 12, proving that Renji was paying attention after all, and once in Chapter 13.

Here’s a six-part video series on how to make your own waraji. I did not know that waraji were for short-term use! That was the second most interesting thing I learned writing this fanfic! The shihakushou headcanon is one I have been working on for a long time and I’m glad that I finally worked it into a fanfic. I wrote out most of my thoughts on the topic here, and here’s the senkaimon transfer protocol post that originally got me thinking about it way back when.

I did a whole post on the “Black Dog of Rondanini” kidou Rukia is trying to read. Thanks to the Bleach wiki for the kanji version of the chant, which was very helpful in writing this part.

Obligatory link to the Renji breaks his arm story.

The poem Renji is trying to write out is the Iroha, a pangram that was used as a kana ordering system prior to 1890. I felt like it was the sort of thing a boy’s mother would make him copy out to practice his writing, analogous to the old "quick brown fox".

Chapter 4

(for realsies, tho, a lot of the dream sequence references this post I made about the symbolism of Sode no Shirayuki taking the form of a yuki-onna)

Chapter 5

I was trying to come up with a list of common items that an Edo era traveler might buy/take with them on a journey when I inadvertently came across the number one most interesting thing I learned while writing this fanfic.

The incident Rukia remembers about thinking Renji didn’t like her until the day she laughed at some sick burn he made is the same incident Renji mentions in Chapter 4 of a little in love, in which he thought she didn’t like him until the day she laughed at his sick burn. What a couple of idiots.

“Rukia even worked in a shop for a bit.” If this seems familiar, it’s because it’s from my unfinished Inuzuri story I Can’t Believe I Found You in that Town and I’m sure I’ve posted excerpts from it on Tumblr. It was a pawn shop. Her job was scamming people. She was very good at it.

Re: the 1000 kan budget Mr. M gives them: For reference, per Color Bleach+, an issue of the Monthly Seireitei Bulletin costs 380 kan. A cosplay Squad 4 nurse’s outfit costs 5,980. City inflation is wild.

“I like the signs they have here,” Rukia says, pointing up at one that shows a pipe with rings of smoke coming out of it. “You can tell what the shops have without having to go in.” I went down a real rabbit hole on Edo era kanbans (and yes, that’s the etymological origin of kanban boards used in agile project management). A lot of them relied on puns, and I read in one article that high-end city shops would make their signs rely on insider knowledge so that only their more sophisticated customers would recognize them, which is the most Seireitei-ass thing I have ever heard.

“I did some arm-breaking for a crooked apothecary for a while,” Renji admits. There were some more details on this in the Renji-breaks-his-arm story, and probably also the upcoming chapter of Heart is a Muscle. If it feels like Renji mentions about six thousand different jobs he had in Inuzuri, I did that on purpose, because I wanted him to feel like a guy who was always on the grind. Most of the jobs were extremely short-lived.

Chapter 6

“I know about wheels!” Renji volunteers. “For a while, I worked at a place that took old carts and swapped their wheels around to make them look different and then sold them again.” Inuzuri is the chop shop capital of Soul Society

“We met a shinigami once, in Inuzuri. We both got real hungry, just from being around them.” I realize that everyone has not watched episode 32 of the Bleach anime 100,000 times, but this happened in episode 32 of the Bleach anime. There’s a screenshot of them in the post above.

Chapter 7 Mr. Mochida’s home district is Zanshien (残紫苑) Lingering Aster. Aster means “remembrance” in hanakotoba. Sometimes I am not subtle.

“There was a girl. That’s a complete story in itself.” Man, you know how I feel about lines like that.

Kaho, written 馨朋, means “sweet-smelling friend” because I was still on my flower bullshit.

Renji clenches one fist. “Our friendship can take this, Rukia. It’s like the book I’ve been reading on bodyweight exercises. The way you build muscle is by tearing the fibers apart, and then more muscle grows in to repair the tears, and that’s how you get stronger.” A lot of times, I have regrets about the name The Heart is a Muscle, but then I write crap like this.

The tapping also shows up in Between Tides.

“when sparrows begin building their nests” is one of Japan’s 72 poetic microseasons. The Japanese school year has begun in April since 1886, so I assume that's when the Shin'ou term starts, as well. I figured the Rukongai kids would try out shortly before then, so that they can just stay if they get in. The idea of official communications from the Seireitei being conducted in the most arcane ways possible was done with love for @bleachbleachbleach

One of the first things I did when I picked up this fanfic again earlier this year was try to calculate how long it would actually take to walk from the Inuzuri to the Seireitei. I have all kinds of notes based on the stuff Yoruichi tells the Karakura kids about how long it takes to walk around the Seireitei, the diameters of Tokyo and NYC, amounts of time I felt would be practical, etc, etc, and in the end, I just used some numbers that felt right in my heart. Time dilation in the deep Rukon is yet another headcanon I picked up from B3, but it’s also how I reconcile the various competing estimates of Rukia’s age. Do not try to follow Mr. Mochida and Hatori’s math, they’re probably using some silly “Thirty days hath September” calculation mnemonics. I think you can take my word for it that Rukia and Renji made it to their tests on time. For the record, they passed.

[perverse-idyll]

5 Things You Never Get Tired of Writing

 Ah, thanks for tagging me, @billsfangearring! I am remarkably witless when it comes to thinking in terms of tropes and personal obsessions. So I’m just going to fake it. Tagging @danpuff-ao3, @titconao3, @liladiurne, @vulnerasanenturmyprince, @squibstress

rules: list five things you never get tired of writing. it can be tropes, themes, characters, phrases, whatever brings you joy. then tag five people!

1. I never seem to tire of describing Severus Snape, eyes, hands, greasy hair - even his arse (that’s for you, @consistentsquash​, but I can’t deny it!). I love inflicting a Pathetic Fallacy on him, making his physical landscape reflect his emotional murkiness, the impact he has on the POV character (usually Harry), not to mention blurring the boundary between imperfectly, unpleasantly human and melodramatically, even mythically larger-than-life. I hope that makes sense. I enjoy translating Snape’s moral ambiguities into the messy human dimension  while also leaning hard on ‘the uncanny’ (a way of othering Snape to make him vibrate at a different frequency than that self-same ordinary human version). I guess I want him to exist in between these two states. That’s the only reason I can think of for persisting in writing the extended version of The Lost World. No one needs this story! But Snape as Faust (or maybe that’s Al’s role?), Snape as Cupid, as Tam Lin, as the serpent in the garden… Ugh, this sounds so pretentious. And not Potterish at all! So much for concision. Anyway. You get the idea. My lavish physical descriptions of Snape act as gateways to the Mystery of the Interior. (Yes, I’m being tongue-in-cheek.) But I’ll stop now before my first “thing” on the list turns into an essay. 🙄 And because this reads as completely incoherent. Ah, one more almost-forgotten note: I love to describe Snape sensuously. To bestow on him an erotic existence and subvert or just plain ignore the penalties visited upon ugliness. So if you don’t want to read about Snape pacing through a story being a bitter, hot, fucked-in-the-head, smoldering, ugly man, avoid my fic.

2. Um, thing two. Bittersweet redemptions. Tragic redemptions, too. Also failed redemptions: see Mine the Gall. I’m using the term loosely, because maybe it's just a recovery or a realization, one earned but at a cost that may or may not have been worth it. This is a divide between reader me and writer me. As a reader, yes, sure, bring on the happy endings. They’re the perfect balm to balance the fics that wring my heart (which I grapple to me with hoops of steel). But when I’m writing, I gravitate toward loss and uncertainty and a more tentative kind of hope. I want the reader to feel a blissful pain. I like catharsis. But I also like the reward at the end, for my characters to reach the shore, weary and salt-shriveled and still together. The redemption may not wash away their guilt (looking at you, Severus), but it will still be more than they ever thought possible. Something they don’t believe they deserve - even if ‘deserve’ is the wrong way to look at it.

3. I love UST. Love, love, love it. Slather it around. Make my faves suffer because of it. Even when my OTP has already been locked in passionate embrace for thousands of words, I still want there to be UST, in defiance of the fact that once consummated, it should presumably be dispelled. And of course it must be soaked in equally unresolved feelings - erotic anguish, erotic contradictions, the incongruity of seemingly incompatible people welded to each other by unquenchable longing. The cocktail of unresolved tension - physical desire may be the glass, but yearning, projection, heartbreak, devotion, hatred, and tenderness provide the flammable alcohol. (Terrible metaphor, but I’m at work and can’t do better than that right now.) I love UST because it heightens everything. Even the most minor gesture acquires more meaning than it has any right to. I am not a subtle writer. I thrive on intensity.

4. The cocktail above reminds me - imagery. I’m not sure I could write without it. Periodically I try scraping the barnacles off - but there you go, the first thing I reach for is a metaphor. The elusiveness of meaning is a not-so-secret vice of mine, and imagery brings up those layers. I'm pretty convoluted in my mental processes anyway (not an approach to writing I recommend), and images in fic can evoke complex reactions without resorting to infodumping. Readers - all of us - interpret even the plainest, most straightforward prose through our personal filters, but images can sneak in on a more visceral level. Sometimes, of course, all those pretty phrases just clutter up the scenery. But if I find the right words, it can be the one indelible line, the one haunting moment a reader remembers long after they’ve forgotten what the fic is about.

5. I will keep this short. I like broken characters. I don’t enjoy breaking them myself, but I feel compelled to write about the way other characters cut themselves on those jagged edges. I enjoy mapping out their coping mechanisms, the degrees to which they’re able to heal (although not completely). How little they trust, how devastating their need for comfort can be. How cruel they are, how good at drawing blood, and how they see love as a force that can utterly shatter them. And more in that vein. But I’ve rattled on long enough!

[somatheking]

Can you list the romantic and/or sexual relationships with other muses and tell us something about about why are you shipping with them and how does this relationship look like? :)

Romantic?? No, no, no. Nothing like that here.

Well... maybe with one person. Though I kind of answered it here and here.

HOWEVER. I'd much rather talk about PLATONIC relationships, especially the one I have with Kuzuryuu.

He's someone I look up to. We disagree on many things, especially when it comes to games and he's all about making them fair while I'm... not. Kuzuryuu has very clearly established moral principles and I feel like I lost mine along the way. I just don't even know anymore what I believe in, if anything.

But Kuzuryuu has stuck to my side through thick and thin. Whenever I feel particularly lost, I come to him for guidance and he offers really good insight. At the end of the day, I think he trusts that I can somehow turn my life around and find peace before... well, before someone wins my game. And I'm extremely grateful for the fact that he hasn't given up on me yet.

OOC: below the cut is a scene I wrote between the two of them that I wanted to share, with Soma coming to him because of an issue and Kuzuryuu gently guiding him. Tagging @diamond-attorney-keiichi

“Hey,” says Soma, as he enters the room and sits on Kuzuryuu’s bed. Kuzuryuu, sitting on the chair by his desk with an open book between his hands, first peers at him above his glasses and then closes the book, setting it on the table and turning his chair to look at Soma. He doesn't look annoyed by his presence there, then again, he never does, so he can't tell if he's simply become used to it by now or he just doesn't mind interruptions.

“Hello,” he greets. “No patients today?”

“I already finished for the day. What are you reading?”

“Crime and Punishment,” he replies, and Soma scoffs. He’s reread that at least three times since they’d met each other, and it was by no means a short novel. He's never quite understood his obsession with it, though.

“You’re always reading that. Kinda makes me consider picking it up. Would I like it?”

Kuzuryuu’s lips curve into a slight smile, amused. “No. You’d probably think Raskolnikov is ‘a whiny bitch’, in your words.”

“You think? Why?”

“Raskolnikov believes that extraordinary people are above the moral law and kills an old woman to prove he is one of them, though he ends ups killing her sister too. Then he spends the rest of the novel feeling guilty about it to the point of falling victim to illness and delirium, and ends up turning himself in.”

“Yeah, a whiny bitch. Who would I like, then?”

“Based on what you’ve told me about your experience as a medical student, I’d say you’d enjoy Kafka. He wrote a book where Poseidon, the greek god of the seas, is so busy with paperwork every day that he has never once seen his own domains, and finds this perfectly normal. And his most famous book, Metamorphosis, is about a boy who wakes up transformed in a cockroach, and-“

“I know Metamorphosis,” he interrupts brusquely, but Kuzuryuu seems unphased.

“And did you like it?”

“I- I said I knew about it,” he replies, defensively. “I’ve never read it.”

“Well then,” says Kuzuryuu, with an affable smile and a tone that lacks judgement. “If it ever piques your interest, you can take it from my room.”

“I actually didn’t come here to talk about books,” says Soma, and before he can continue, Kuzuryuu lets out a small laugh, deep and gravelly and unmistakably fond.

“Excuse my laughter, but when have you ever?” 

“Shut up.” Soma isn’t the biggest bookworm, a fact that for some reason amuses Keiichi to no end. “There’s something I wanted to ask you.”

Kuzuryuu nods, encouraging him to continue.

“Did you find my game too predictable? The maze one”

Kuzuryuu furrows his brow and leans forward. “I helped you make that one specifically. Why would I help you produce something I believe to be bad?”

Soma sighs. Sometimes it took asking the same thing twenty times before Keiichi decided to give a coherent answer instead of going around in circles. Lawyer habits, he thought. “Okay, I can rephrase the question if you’re going to be difficult about it. Do you think my games are predictable? Should I be making them harder?”

“Why would you want to make them harder? Since when has your objective been to kill more people in your games?”

“You’re twisting up my words now,” protests Soma. “I never said I wanted to kill more people. Just wondering if I should make them more challenging.”

“More challenging games means less chances of survival for the players,” countered Kuzuryuu. “The maze game was the 4 of hearts, if I recall correctly. It’s a low difficulty game, so why would you want to make it intentionally harder than it should be?”

“Because… okay, don’t laugh,” he starts, pointing a finger at him as Kuzuryuu feigns an innocent expression. “Today, this girl told me my game had been ‘too obvious’, that it had been clear from the start that the animal sounds were a recording, and, in her words, ‘whoever designed it did an awful job’. So, I don’t know if-“

He’s interrupted by an actual laugh this time, one that makes Kuzuryuu’s chest heave and causes him to have to take off his glasses. It would be nice to witness if only he wasn’t so annoyed. “I’m sorry, Soma, is this about impressing a girl?”

“No! You’ve got it all wrong.”

“About your ego, then.”

There’s a pause, because it might be about exactly that, but now Soma doesn’t feel like admitting it. “I’m going to stop coming to you for advice,” he says instead, a threat they both know is empty. “It’s not worth the headache I get afterwards.”

“Of course,” replies Kuzuryuu, nodding. “No one’s forcing you to do that. You can always come to talk about other things. Books, perhaps?”

[fuck-yeah-writing]

Pinned post!

🧃🍄✨

Introduction to me: My name is Ash. My pronouns are he/they/ey/it. (Full set to ey is ey/em/eir/eirs/emself) I'm an aroace trans guy. I'm autistic, I have adhd + other mental issues. I have chronic pain + fatigue + other chronic problems. I'm very pro-palestine. I really like nature and will accept nature facts. I'm 15.

Boundaries: I'm open to any questions about my sexuality, gender, disorders, physical problems, etc (other questions are welcome too, these are just the ones i mentioned above that ppl might not know if I'm okay with them asking abt). You can DM me if you want as long as you're nice, use tone tags when they're needed, and aren't creepy. Asks (anon available) are welcome and highly encouraged. Constructive criticism is okay, random hate is not. If you're gonna screen shot and repost my posts (for example a lot of ppl do that with Pinterest) make sure to give me credit (this can just be making sure my URL is visible). Thank you!

This blog is Hostile Towards: Zionists, terfs, other transphobes, homophobes, ableists, racists, Evangelists, "not all men" ppl, pro-trump shitheads, just bigots in general, anything diet culture-y, etc.

Blog content warnings: swearing, caps, etc will be common and most likely not have tws. I made a list of things I do and don't tw (you can request me to add tws if you need them tho and I'll add them). Whump, other angst, and trauma will be discussed (with tws).

Tag guide:

In the tags I usually put a tone tag (or add one in the post itself). I made a post on tone tags and what they are if your confused.

AHH; post about a hyper fixation/special interest of mine

Gonna graffiti this somewhere; something activism-y

Horrible lists; lists I made.

Me???; personal post

Rebob; reblog

Screaming crying throwing up; (not common) post abt or that includes something romantic.

Shaking their jar rn; post about whump

Writing prompt?; writing prompt lol.

Wrote while tired; smth from a wip of mine that I wrote while I was tired and am prolly sharing for laughs.

✨; original post

[5ummit]

Banned Tags

When I made my original Tumblr Purge 2: Electric Boogaloo PSA, I knew the situation was bad, but I still had no idea how bad. It was only after I started noticing how many posts were missing on iOS, investigating exactly which tags caused them to be blocked, and making my own list that it really sunk in. Y’all it’s bad. It’s real bad.

While most of the banned tags are at least somewhat logical (nsfw, porn, kink, etc) there are also a significant number that have no relation to “sensitive content” whatsoever. In fact, these tags are so ubiquitous you would be hard pressed to find a single tumblr user that doesn’t regularly use at least some of them, especially content creators. I don’t know how these tags could’ve possibly ended up on the banned list, but my guess based on my findings and tumblr’s general level of competence: a bunch of blogs flagged as explicit were scraped and all of the tags that were used x amount of times were dumped into a “banned tag” database and never checked by a real human. I can only assume that some of these will be walked back eventually once the backlash becomes great enough (as they did in the Original Purge), but until that happens we’re left managing this mess as best we can.

And in case you’re thinking to yourself “surely it can’t be that bad,” here are all of the general/fandom tags I’ve found so far that are now hidden, from both searches and dashboards, on the iOS app (more under the cut):

[Updated Feb 8, 2023]

mine

my stuff/mystuff

my gif(s)/mygifs

my photo(s)/myphotos

my face/myface

my thing

my life

my post

my video

my words

made by me

queue/queued

upload

reblog/reblogged

reply

request

submission

about/about me

self/selfie

answered

tagged

misc

me

long post

repost

donate

ask to tag

don’t reblog

self reblog

trigger

trigger warning

cw

1k

user

userstream

userveronika

userjessie

usercandy

usertana

userrishi

userrobin

useronce

bbelcher

winterswake

marveladdicts

womenedit

ladiesblr

othedit

dailymlgifs

the winter soldier

alec lightwood

Obviously these are not the only tags that have been banned but they’re the most commonly used for content creators and the least obvious so I wanted to put them right up front to spread awareness.

I’ve been compiling my own comprehensive list of banned tags for the past couple days and was planning to post them, but it looks like someone beat me to the punch and there’s now a whole blog dedicated to collecting them and multiple posts with fairly extensive lists so far! With that in mind, I’m going to continue adding to my list of banned general/fandom tags above, since I feel those are the most important to single out and be aware of, but I’ve decided to forgo posting my own complete list and let @bannedtags​ take over as the primary resource. This is honestly for the best, since with the extreme number of banned tags that currently exist (and still growing!), I’ve come to realize I just do not have the time, energy, or mental health capacity to continue this project right now.

What I would like to offer instead is a bit more information on how these banned tags seem to work and what you can do to mitigate the damage from this disaster of an update.

There are two main types of banned tags:

Softblocked on all platforms – Posts tagged with these words are unsearchable on all browsers and apps but will still appear on your dashboard (as long as you’re not using the iOS app). These seem to be the same tags that have been softblocked since the Original Purge. On the iOS app, these tags are now hardblocked (type #2).

Hardblocked on the iOS app (as of version 22.5.1) – Posts tagged with these words are unsearchable + hidden on iOS dashboards. This applies to both tags on reblogs and original posts. Also, if the OP uses a banned tag, any reblogs will be hidden on all iOS dashboards regardless of the reblogger’s tags.

IMPORTANT NOTE: The new hardblock system ONLY applies to the iOS app. If you’re accessing tumblr via any other browser or app, even Chrome or Safari on iOS, the only ban that directly affects you is the first one.

How do you identify a banned tag and how do you know which type it is? 

The only way to determine if a tag has been banned is to search it. If it’s banned you will generally get one of two results depending on the type. Softblocked tags will appear to be searchable but have no search results (with some sort of cheeky message about not finding anything). Hardblocked tags will display a pop-up saying “This content has been hidden.” There is no way to know if a tag has been hardblocked on iOS without searching for it on the iOS app.

Softblocked on all platforms (+ hardblocked on the iOS app):

Hardblocked only on the iOS app:

This message system is a good rule of thumb but it’s not a 100% foolproof way to know which type is which. The only way to know for sure is to search on both iOS and another browser/app. If the tag displays search results in a browser but not the iOS app then it’s only blocked on iOS.

In addition to the two types, here are the basic “rules” for how all banned tags seem work as of right now, at least that I’ve been able to discern through trial and error since there’s no explanation provided anywhere:

Only tags are searched for banned content. This means you can still write whatever you want in the body of the post without fear of it being blocked.

Sometimes banned words embedded in a longer tag will result in the post being blocked, but not always. This especially seems to be true if the banned word is the first word in the tag. For example, the tag for the movie “single all the way” appears to be banned because it includes the banned word “single”. For this reason, it’s safest to just assume you can’t use a banned word or phrase anywhere in a tag unless you’ve checked it and know for sure it’s safe.

Banned words merged with no spaces are not recognized as banned content unless that specific combination has also been banned. For example, “sugar daddy” is banned but “sugardaddy” is still searchable.

So what can you do if you find out one of the tags you’ve been using regularly is now banned and your old posts are hidden to a large percentage of the userbase?

Luckily there’s an extremely handy website called Mass Tag Replacer that allows you to find and replace any given tag on hundreds of posts in seconds! You do have to give it read/write access to your blog, but you can revoke the access at any time. I’ve used this website for many years and never had any issues with it.

As for how to search a banned tag? The @bannedtags​ blog actually discovered some semi-workarounds: adding apostrophes around the tag (ex: ‘nsft’) or adding a period after the tag (ex: nsft.). I’ve tested this and can confirm that it generally works (at least at the moment), but the results can be spotty. Still, it’s better than nothing!

This whole situation is very new and in a state of flux so I’m going to continue my research and keep this post updated as we learn more.

[buckybarnesdiaries]

longing, rusted, seventeen, daybreak, furnace, nine, benign, homecoming, one, freight car

© mine.

bucky barnes x reader. ⎢ masterlist.

Bucky is kidnapped by Hydra to reactivate the Winter Soldier.

word count: 2.924 words. it worth it, i promise!!!

warnings/tags: none. angst as hell mostly. but it has a happy ending.

author notes: i don't speak russian, but i haven't used google translate either, so no worries. none of my stories contain reader’s body descriptions to be inclusive.

join the tag list NEW!!! here.

No. It couldn't be possible. It had to be part of a terrible nightmare. Bucky couldn't have been kidnapped by Hydra again.

You didn't know what to expect in the ship flying to the secret location of the organization. For Stark, it didn't take more than a couple of minutes to track the arm down, since Shuri put a small monitor on it when the soldier stayed in Wakanda. She never told it, wanting to use it in some kind of circumstance like the one you all were going through now. And you couldn't be more grateful, but it didn't help to make you feel better.

You were sitting close to the back hatch. Back rested against the metallic wall and legs curled to your chest. Nothing inside your head more than the hallucination of a pair of blue eyes staring at you. Blaming yourself was something you couldn't avoid. You should have been with him, by his side, protecting him as many times you promised him. But in fact, you just failed him. You failed his trust, his love. You let them take him. Only God knew which torture Hydra was putting him under, while you were there, lamenting.

You didn't even notice Steve's presence squatting next to you until he placed a hand on your shoulder. Then, you raised your face towards him. He was suffering too. In the end, Bucky was his long-life friend, his big brother. He lost him once and felt like he was going to lose him twice. Although this time was different. You were carrying the dispositive that could put to sleep back the winter soldier, but, at what cost?

“Buck got you now. Everything is gonn—”. He spoke in plural, referring to your last night's talk.

“How could you be so calm, Steve? How do you do it?” You whispered through your trembling lips, about to break in crying.

“Because he needs us focused, not distracted”.

He was wise. Captain America was wiser than anyone in that ship. He curled the left corner of his lips up, trying to make you feel good, trying to transmit you the encouragement you needed to not give up. And he did, more or less. You had to fight harder than ever. For Bucky, and only for Bucky. That's why you didn't hesitate on jumping out from the ship when it landed on the cold hard ground, as the freezing weather hit you on the face.

Following the plan, you ran quietly to the back door hidden under a huge layer of snow. Shaking part of it with the palm of your hand, you placed the device with technology from Wakanda on the locker. Not later than fifteen seconds, it deciphered the code to open the hatch. Once in position, the Avengers followed you downstairs. The passage was empty and silent. The only sound that broke it was a couple of rats running away from your presence. You all had studied the plans of the building, mostly underground, remembering exactly where you had to go.

The coast was clear, that was the reason why you all were so confused. You were expecting to find more than a dozen of agents, but when T'Challa enunciated through your earwigs that he only located two heat spots, you couldn't believe it. How only one man kidnapped the most fearless assassin up to now? Tortuous and bitter screams dragged you back to reality, causing your brain to react to make your legs run faster than ever in your whole damn life. You knew by heart that voice beneath all the pain.

Your skin bristled when your gaze landed on that chair of horrors, connected to an enormous power source. Bucky was sitting there against his want.

“... добросердечный… возвращение на родину… один…”

“STOP IT”. Steve yelled.

Huge mistake. You were aware of it when —yes— that man stopped reciting the Russian words to re-activate the Winter Soldier, but only enough time to push a red button near to him and close the heavy door in front of you. Everything happened in the blink of an eye. At the moment you glimpsed Steve’s shield sliding above the floor, straight to the inside of the room where Bucky was being tortured, you followed the same way. Never in your life, you were this fast. Like a lightning bolt, you snaked yourself under the small distance between the door and the ground before being closed. Now, it was you, that man and the soldier.

“You’re late…” He mocked with an awful American accent, under James crying out loud in pain. “грузовой ваг—”.

Your left hand moved quickly to unholster your gun and shoot him. One… Two… Three… Four bullets right to his head. The man fell dead before he couldn’t complete the command. You didn’t lose time, running to the controls to try to turn that machine off. But it was impossible. Even if you knew Tony could do it, there wasn’t signal inside those large and wide walls made of steel reinforced. You were in one of those abandoned soviet bunkers, that could save you from Armageddon. You were inhaling and exhaling so fast that your lungs never got really full, trying to focus, trying to shut every single noise around up. Trying to think of a plan b. But it was your heart who pushed you to act and not your brain. Grabbing Steve’s shield, you aimed for the energy source before tossing it like a damn frisbee.

That thing blew up, turning off any kind of light and dispositive around, as the sparks and the cables decorated your surroundings. Just like the fire that started to burn down a pile of boxes with different documents of Hydra. But that wasn't why you were impatient. Catching the shield when it came back to you, your legs moved immediately to Bucky, still stirring on his seat for a few seconds else. Then, he simply stopped shaking. Her eyes were wide opened. Reddened, in tears. His chest rose and fell violently. His heart was racing. And you could see the trauma taking control over his body in holy silence.

You didn't doubt removing the protection from his mouth along the restraints keeping him on the chair. Your fingers trembled like never before, not having any more time to lose. Probably, the Avengers would be trying to open the door when the emergency red lights illuminated the bunker, producing a loud alarm sound to indicate that something was going wrong inside the facilities.

“C'mon, Buck… C'mon, we have to leave”. You told him, trying to help him to stand up.

But as soon as your hand was about to land on his arm of vibranium, the five cold digits got closed around your throat. Soon, the lack of air for you was more than evident. He got up on his own, not needing you to do it. The ocean blue in his eyes turned into a dark storm. There wasn't any gesture on his face, more than his jaw clenching, pressing his teeth together. That wasn't Bucky —your Bucky—, but the unstable trained assassin Hydra turned him in. You could barely gulp saliva, gripping his metallic wrist with both of your hands to try to stop him from murdering you.

He couldn't. He couldn't kill you. His strength was suffocating you with no mercy, though.

For a moment, you felt too weak to fight, seeing everything around you getting blurred and darker. Blacking out. But there was something inside you, a sweet tone of voice calling your name. A male voice. Your eyelids rolled down bit by bit, wanting to concentrate on that honeyed sound being closer and closer.

“любить”.

The sore whisper left your lips. Love. The first time Bucky told you about love came to your mind. He told you about his family. George, Winnifred, Rebecca. He told you how much he desired to have a family of his own. To be loved.

“новый”.

Your almost dead fingers traced the form of his new arm made in Wakanda when you felt him lifting you from the floor, being suspended on air.

“сороковых годов”.

Trying to keep a firm tone of voice as much as the pressure let you, the Russian words were spat to the confused soldier, who wasn't understanding what you were doing. The forties changed his life. He was sent to war and, lately, captured by HYDRA. It was something he'd never forget, part of his DNA.

“заката”.

You didn't know what the hell your subconscious was doing either till that precise instant. You were reprogramming him. You were using his own memories to reset his wiped brain from them. Dusk. The first night he spent in Wakanda, Bucky was terrified. But you stayed with him. You comforted him by saying that everything was going to be okay, that his life would be different. That he was safe. That he was at home.

“лето”.

His last night of summer in that kingdom, Bucky took you to his favorite place between the woods, wanting to show you the fireflies fluttering in the middle of the gloom. He used to walk there whenever he woke up from a nightmare. Those small insects used to make him feel better for some reason he didn't comprehend. Until he saw their light reflecting on your amazed orbs. Bucky knew then he was in love with you. Besides his long-life friend, the only person who never judged him, who never ran away from him. The same person that now was dying under his fingers.

“шесть”

Six years took him to be Bucky, after his last war, after the last effort, after the last jump. He was a new man. You made him a new man. A good one. You guided him through the right way. You helped him to get used to the twenty-one century. You accompanied him to therapy and stayed in the waiting room every single session until he finished.

“заткнуться”.

The soldier ordered you to shut up, earning quite the opposite when you knew it was sorting some kind of effect on him, as soon as you felt some relief by the grip loosening around your throat and your tiptoes touching the ground. Little by little, you opened your eyes again, gluing them on the blue ones fixed on you.

“боец”.

He wasn't a super soldier, he was a fighter. He spent the last six years of his life fighting for it, fighting for ruling his existence, fighting for being pardoned for crimes he didn't want to commit, fighting for your love. Bucky furrowed swallowing, allowing you to place your feet on the floor.

“Бруклин”.

And when he demonstrated to the world that he was no longer the Winter Soldier, but James Bucky Barnes, he moved to his birthplace. Brooklyn. You and he rented an apartment together when you both learned that you couldn't live apart. That you were made for each other.

“Отец…”

A tear ran down your cheek, slowly moving your left hand to his free one. A shiver toured his backbone when he felt your warm touch holding his hand and, even if his cold fingers were still around your throat, the soldier bowed his head to follow the connection between the two of you. His flesh hand landed on your stomach, pressing it under yours, trying to transmit to him the news about your pregnancy status. Bucky was going to be a father. You were going to build a family as he always wished.

“Свобода”.

As the sob escaped your soul, his hand made of vibranium released your neck. Freedom was what he got after all those years.

Bucky was free.

His hold was the only thing that kept you on your feet, pining to the cold hard ground, as well as you trying to fill your lungs with the heavy air around you because of the dense smoke coming from the flames burning down that damn place. You watched Bucky picking the shield close to you, probably believing it could be easier to kill you with it than with his own hands. Your arms automatically wrapped your abdomen, as if you could protect your unborn child from that horror, crying James' name to remember you.

“James… James…”

You weren't able to stop whining, feeling a heavy sorrow under your chest, covering your vitals organs. The noisy sound from the bunker was suddenly turned into a constant beep, beep, beep that caused you to frown yet keeping your eyes closed. You called him once and again until a warm hand laced his fingers with you. Peace invaded you eventually, after a fond squeeze around your skin followed by a pair of rough lips pressed on your forehead. You let yourself go, not finding any strength inside your heart to continue awake.

The next time you opened your eyes, you needed a moment to adjust your gaze to the sunlight. Purring feeling more comfortable than before, you rolled on your stomach, sinking your nose into the large pillow. Bucky's scent was like a punch of reality. Your eyes snapped open as your pulse increased, starting to panic. Sitting up, your orbs moved quickly all around the room you recognized instantly. It was your dorm in the Compound, the one you used to share with your boyfriend —and the father of your child. It was empty. No trace of James anywhere. You tossed away the oxygen mask and the sheets covering your stiff anatomy, getting up from the bed. Another huge mistake.

Everything spun around you, feeling strong dizziness hitting your head, having to sit down for a second. But as soon as you felt recovered, you stood up again walking straight to the main door to step out. The hallway was deserted, hearing some voices coming from the meeting room. You followed them slowly, finding balance with your palm against the walls. Sam was the first one noticing your presence, coming faster to help you.

“James… James…” You mumbled, not really sure about when you started to sob again, whilst your muscles got tense with every syllable.

“He's okay, he's okay, take it easy, girl”. He tried to calm you as Steve reached you to bring you to the closest chair.

“We don't know what you did… but even if that man introduced the commands again… you turned it off”. Natasha spoke this time.

“I re— I repro— reprogramed him”.

The confusion was more than evident between the Avengers present in the room. But no one of them had the need to ask how. The spy taught you Russian in your free time, you weren't a fluent speaker, but it was enough to have a chat. Even so, you weren't going to say the words you used. You weren't going to make Bucky go through another wipe. If they worked, you'd make sure that he'd hear them when the occasion required it.

“I wan— wanna see him… please”. You cried covering your face with both hands, desolated after the hell of the situation you had to live.

“He's resting”. Steve informed you, squatting close and placing a hand on your right thigh to gently caress it. “And you should do the same. For your baby”.

“There's no way you're gonna stop me from seeing him”. You replied, raising your head and looking at him through your eyelids. Silently pleading.

He snorted, convinced that you wouldn't change your mind. Nodding two times with his head, he stood up and offered you a hand to hold it and help you to walk. Steve guided you through upstairs, following your pace step by step —he could have carried you onto his arms, but he wasn't sure if he could hurt you accidentally. You were too weak, barely breathing properly because of all the smoke you swollen inside the bunker. Although you started to feel somewhat erratic and excited as you were coming to Bucky's old dorm.

Steve opened the door for you, letting you walk inside before closing it behind your back. Your boyfriend was peacefully sleeping under the sheets. There were some scars on his face, already healed but yet seeming painful. The only explanation you found to be there was that Bucky used the shield to open the door and take you out of the bunker. A theory that made more sense when you noticed that he hadn't his prosthesis and his shoulder was covered by a thin black microfiber.

You headed to the bed, tucking in to wrap his warm and heavy body between your arms. At the moment he felt you, he embraced you as better as he could, not opening his eyes but shedding a tear. His lips started to tremble as you pecked them, previous to hiding his face into your neck.

“I'm so sorry…” Bucky sobbed, causing your whole anatomy to shudder because of the sorrow in his voice.

“We're gonna be okay, my love… You, me, our baby… Our family”.

His crying increased after those two words, caressing his back slowly to comfort him somehow. You knew that this recovery would be hard and painful, being conscious of how close he had been to end with your life. He didn't want to do it, nobody could deny it. You were everything he had, everything he always wished for deep inside his soul and heart. And the acknowledgment of having a baby with you only provoked him to feel guiltier.

But as you said so, everything was going to be okay.

feedback is appreciated, please, leave a comment to let me know if you liked it.

and REBLOG!!!

support the writers 🤍

tag list: @whatrambles @cleopatra12345 @phoenixhalliwell @homesicam @marvel-diaries @amelia-song-pond @heartbeats-wildly @met4no1a @weenersoldierr @petlaufeyson @sillygamingartghost @wildflowergubler @isnt-it-loverly @zealouspursecowboydeputy @rvgrsbrns @artisancowbells @plagooey @tinylumpiaa @hemsbucky @bxmaaa @quxxnxfhxll @soldierstucky @knowyourworth-sellyoursoul @hateinthemorning @asemistablehundredyearoldman @purpleelfwizard @twinerd14 @meg4n_hughe5 @nikkixostan @stolenxkissess @wintersfilm @whoreforsamwilson @thatcrackheadsadbitchtm @shinynewboots @baconmuffins1216 @28cnn @hxlyhoax

** the @ crossed out is because tumblr doesn't let me tag you, but you can activate notifications for when i post any writing!

[mandos-sluts]

The Visit

This is Part One of a three-part series

The Visit Part Two

The Visit Part Three

The Mandolorian x Fem!Reader

Rating: Explicit

Word count: 3.5k

Warnings: Smut, dubious consent, fingering, dirty talk, mentions of sex work

Summary: You are Luke Skywalker’s Padawan, training directly under him at his Jedi Academy. Din Djarin is staying at the compound for a few days to visit Grogu.

A/N: Please message us or comment if you want to be on our tag list!! Also we love feedback <3

“What does he look like?”

“He’s a Mandalorian. Big silver shiny armor. Can’t miss him.”

*************************************

Boy was he right. You spot Din as soon as you step into the cantina. He’s standing at the bar, leaning over it slightly. His visor catches your eye from across the room, and he stares at you for a while, looking you up and down, before turning his head back to the bar. He’s never seen someone so beautiful in this parsec before.

Your Master, Luke Skywalker, told you to meet Din at the cantina and escort him to the Jedi Academy. Luke had similarly informed Din that he was sending his Padawan to rendezvous.

You know all about Din Djarin. You know his whole deal with Grogu and the Darksaber, and his run-ins with the Empire and the Guild. The story of his miraculous rescue of Grogu made its way around the school after Luke brought the child back to the Academy.

The cantina that you’re at is located in the town that lies right outside the Jedi Academy compound. It’s a place that many students go to blow off steam and hang out.

You find yourself surprisingly nervous as you walk up to the tall intimating Mandalorian. “Excuse me.” You say.

“Not interested.” He says shortly without even looking at you.

”What?” You asked, confused.

“I said I’m not interested.”

“Not interested in what?”

”Your services.”

”My services?” You don’t understand. Is he wanting to travel to the grounds by himself? That’s not an option....he wouldn’t be permitted on the estate without an escort. Didn’t Luke tell him of this arrangement?

Din exhales, clearly annoyed, and finally turns to look at you. “Do I need to spell it out for you? I’m not looking for a whore.”

You stand there, completely dumbfounded, your mouth slightly open from shock. A whore? What the fuck?!!

In his defense, you are wearing a rather skimpy-looking outfit. You have on what is essentially a tennis skirt and a bandeau; it’s the hot season on the planet. Even so, this guy is an asshole.

You take a breath and put a fake smile on your face. “My apologies….Din Djarin.” You say in a suggestive manner. Turning around to leave, Din whips around and grabs your upper arm tightly, yanking you closer to him.

“How do you know that name?” Din loudly whispers in a demanding, low voice.

You’re not stupid, you know that his name is known only by a few. “My industry has very skilled people.” You respond, hoping he will get the hint that you are in fact not a sex worker, but actually the person he’s supposed be meeting.

”Are you telling me your brothel somehow got a hold of my name?” Din is pretty pissed. Is this what he gets from doing dealings with Jedi? His name gets leaked to brothels?

You let out a sigh as your eyes roll. You snatch your arm out of his grasp and move swiftly out the door into the street. What a jerk. This guy can find his own way to the compound.

Din tries to follow you, needing to know how a random whore got his name, but the streets are pretty crowded.

”Oh, Mr. Djarin!” Din hears someone say. He looks over his shoulder and sees Luke Skywalker approaching him.

“H-hi, Master Skywalker.” Din says, deciding to give up on his pursuit of you, after all, that’s not the reason he’s here.

“I’m surprised to see you here, did my Padawan not pick you up?” Luke asks.

“No. He never showed.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry about that. Let me take you to the Jedi Temple.”

************************************* You hear your Master’s voice and footsteps nearing the empty lounge you’re sitting in. It’s a pretty big, dark lit room. There’s a conference table on one end, and an arrangement of couches and chairs spread across the place. It’s always empty, and you often use the area to meditate or exercise or just hang out. You pretend to look busy, eager for what’s about to occur.

“It is strange that my Padawan did not show up to greet you.” You hear Luke say behind the wall. He pokes his head around the door. “Ah, here she is.” He says walking into the lounge.

She? Din walks a few feet behind Luke. He turns the corner and walks through the door, freezing in his footsteps as soon as he lays eyes on you. There you are, the woman who approached him at the cantina….Luke’s Padawan.

You stare into his visor with a smug half smile on your face and slowly rise from your seat. You’re reveling in how taken aback he clearly is.

“Y/n, this is Din Djarin. I thought we discussed that you’d meet him at the cantina and escort him to the Academy? He says you didn’t show.” Luke says innocently as he stands between you and Din.

“Oh. I did go to the cantina. I guess I missed you.” You say slowly with your eyes locked on his helmet. “My apologies, Din Djarin.”

Din clears his throat. “Um n-no worries at all.” He chokes out. Shit! Din can’t believe he called you a whore. How did he not see the laser sword on your hip?

“Alright, well I’m gonna get to my meeting. Y/n, show Din around, alright?” Luke says.

“Of course Master.” You say with a slight bow of your head. You plant your gaze back on Din’s helmet as it rotates to watch Luke exit.

He slowly turns his look back to you, staring at him confidently with your hands on your hips.

“I’m sorry.” He says flatly through his modulator.

“For being such an asshole?” You say tilting your head.

“Yes. And assuming you were a prostitute.”

“There’s nothing wrong with sex workers. I’m not offended that you mistook me for one.” You say. But….why does it kind of turn you on that he thought you were a whore? Ugh and why does it turn you on that he is such a jerk??

There’s an awkward pause as you both stand there examining each other.

“So, you’re also a…Pawa-don?” Din asks, trying to fill the quiet. He has never been uncomfortable with silence before, in fact, he more often than not preferred it. But right now for some reason he feels different.

“Padawan.” You correct him. “And yes.”

“So are you doing the same training as the kid?” He further probes.

“Kind of. Grogu is more in the elementary stages of training. His focus is mainly on developing and fine-tuning his sensation with the Force. Most of my training nowadays centers around my lightsaber mastery and combat.” You inform him.

“Hm. Wonder when you’ll be good enough to battle me.” Din says casually as he takes a breath.

“What?” You ask.

“I said I wonder when you’ll be good enough in combat to put up a fight against me.”

Is he serious? Is he trying to provoke you? Even after the predicament he just found himself in with you? “Ha….um….I was good enough to fight you years ago.” You declare

Din looks at you for a moment. “I’m a Mandalorian.” He says simply.

“.....”

“The Mandalorian who wields the Darksaber. So you’re either overestimating your own ability or underestimating mine.”

You take a deep breath and take a step closer to him. “I know most people think that Mandalorians are the greatest warriors in the galaxy, but that’s because they don’t know of the Jedi Order. My connection with the force gives me strength that you will never know, that you will never be able to comprehend.”

Din takes a step closer to you. “That may be, but I have decades of combat experience that is simply unmatched by you, not to mention the most imperishable armour in the galaxy.”

“So what I’m hearing is that you would like to duel.” You say as you remove your saber from its holster and activate its blade. It’s a light lavender color, thin and sleek.

“That’s cute.” Din says. “Just a reminder, little girl. You were given that light saber. I won mine in battle.” He proclaims as he detaches his saber from his belt. *see gif*

“I made it. But fair point. Now enough talk, Mandalorian, are you ready to duel or what?” You say as you get into a battle stance.

Din holds his hand out. “If, by some miracle, you do happen to overpower me, don’t touch the saber. Bo-Katan is already mad enough that I have it, I can’t imagine what she’d do if a non-Mandalorian gets their hands on it again.”

“Yeah yeah, I’m well aware of the bizarre way that the ruler of Mandalore is chosen.”

“Alright then, princess, I won’t hold back.”

You feel heat rush through your core at those words. Princess. He won’t hold back. Uggh... focus! This guy has been demeaning you since the moment you met him, show him how powerful you are!

*************************************

You and Din battle for a good seven minutes, the two of you are pretty evenly matched, neither one of you gains the upper hand for very long. Just as you’re feeling your strength falter, you’re able to knock his saber out of his hands, and you push him onto the ground. Din tries to get up and reach for his saber but you plant yourself on top of him, straddling him. He looks up at you in defeat.

He takes a deep breath as you stare down at him. That’s when you notice the tent in his pants. You’re sitting on his legs so that his bulge is right above your crotch.

Adrenaline is pumping through your veins from your victory and a smile stretches across your face. “I have another quality that puts me at an advantage that I forgot to mention: your attraction to me and your primal desire to fuck me.” You say as you slowly place your hand on top of his clothed erection. You lean down and bring your face close to his helmet. “I bet your face is just bright red underneath this helmet of yours. Not only did you lose the battle, but your urges got the best of you.” You say in a condescending tone.

Din stares up at you, his chest moving up and down as he breathes.

“That’s where you and I differ.” You say. “A real warrior has self-control and self-restraint.”

Din moves his hands to your thighs and runs them up to your hips. “Who said I was trying to restrain myself?” He says in a raspy voice.

You’re a little caught off guard. You were teasing him, and this was not the reaction you were expecting. You thought he’d be embarrassed, you thought he’d want to get out of this situation as soon as possible.

“Face it.” You say after a pause. “You can’t repress your arousal, and your lack of self-control is a disadvantage to you.”

Din’s hands are still on your hips, and he pulls you up his body ever so slightly. “So since you have such great self-control, your panties wouldn’t happen to be wet right now, would they?” He inquires in a low, sultry voice.

You’re taken aback at his shameless words. “O-of course not.” You stutter as your confidence recedes.

“Let me see.” He demands flatly.

“What?” Did you hear him right? Your heart beat is pounding, you can’t tell if he’s joking around with you or not like you were doing with him.

“I said let me see.” Din says moving his gloved hands to the bottom of your skirt. “C’mon, pull this short little skirt up just a tad more and show me that your panties are dry.”

“N-no I–”

“Fine.” Din cuts you off. “I’ll do it myself.” He says as he removes one of his gloves. He then moves his bare hand under your skirt up to your pussy, easily pushing the thin panties you're wearing aside and planting two fingers inside your sopping wet folds.

You jerk at the contact of his soft skin on your sensitive pussy. “Din!” You exclaim. You grab his hand, but don’t move it.

Din chuckles. “Looks like you don’t have as much self-discipline as you claim.” He brings his other hand and cups your cheek. “Awwww, your face is just bright red right now.” Din mocks.

“W-whatever, you still lost.” You say out as you’re overcome with humiliation.

“Mmmmm. Congratulations.” Din says lazily as he removes his hand from your cunt and grabs your hips once again. “So, y/n. You showed me how Jedi fight. Let me show you how Mandalorians fuck.” He says as he pulls your hips and grinds you against his bulge.

Your panties are still pulled aside and the friction of his clothed erection against your clit makes you whimper.

“You– you wanna fuck me?” You ask hesitantly.

“Ha. Of course I wanna fuck you. Look at you.” He says as he lifts you off of him to stand up. Standing tall, he towers over you and brings his non-gloved hand to your chin, pulling it up gently to meet his gaze.

The unexpected and prompt shift in the power dynamic has you all turned around. Just moments ago, your confidence was through the roof. You were giddy claiming your victory against him, making fun of him for getting a boner during a duel. But the tone between the two of you has completely changed. He has you weak and timid, he’s looking down at your wide doe eyes as if you’re his prey.

“Come on, little Padawan. Practicing self-control is great, but let me show you what it’s like to lose all control over yourself.” Mando says as he wraps his arm around your waist and pulls you closer to him. “Cuz I would just love to tie you up and have my way with you.” He mutters. Dins hands slide down to your butt as he gropes your flesh, pulling you flat against him. “Let down your guard for just a moment and let me show you how rewarding it can be.” Din slips his bare hand back under your skirt to find your cunt even wetter than before. You let out a whimper and bat your eyes at him.

He starts slowly circling your clit, and moves his other hand up to caress your cheek softly. “Come on.” He whispers in your ear. “I promise you’ll enjoy it.”

High-pitched breaths are escaping your lips as he gently runs his thumb up and down your cheek bone.

“Can– can you not–” you breathe, sliding your hands up his chest.

“What. What is it?”

You pause for a moment. “Can you not be so gentle with me?” You say with slight embarrassment.

Din scoffs, “Oh baby girl, you’re gonna regret saying that.” He says as he grabs a fist full of your hair and roughly pulls your head back, exposing your delicate neck to him.

This harsh action sends shocks to your pussy. “Didn’t you say something about tying me up?” You purr with a slight smile, looking up into his visor.

“So I was right about you being a filthy fuckin whore.” Din spits as he shoves a finger inside of you, his thumb rubbing against your clit.

“Y-yeah, but only for you.” You whine as your eyes fall closed and high-pitched moans begin escaping your lips.

“Ohh that’s right baby.” Din praises. He’s so turned on by the way you’re speaking and responding to his touch, and he loves the impact he has on you. How you so quickly went from a confident fighter when he lost to you, to a shy little girl when he started teasing you, to a dirty slut once he got his hands in your panties.

He starts pumping his finger faster and you can hear the lewd noises your obscenely wet pussy is making. Your mouth opens even more with your moans becoming more pronounced and your back arches. You’re standing pressed flat up against him, he’s basically holding you up on your toes with one arm as his other hand drives into your cunt.

You can feel your orgasm just beginning to climb when you suddenly hear a beep on your watch’s intercom. It jolts you back to reality.

“Y/n, are you at the lounge? I’m heading back there now.” Your Master says through the intercom.

“Shit.” You say as you push Din’s chest, pulling yourself off of him. “I should have shown you to your accommodation by now.” You say as you frantically start looking around your feet for your saber. By the time you grab it and look up for Din, he has already made his way out the back exit.

You attach your saber to your hip as you try to steady your breathing, disoriented from the abrupt conclusion of whatever it was you were doing with Din. You hear Luke’s footsteps approaching as you quickly try to put your panties back in place, growling at how soaked they are. You’re praying that your Master doesn’t notice the wetness that has been smudged on your inner thighs.

*************************************

You cannot believe what you did with Din. No one has ever done anything like that to you before. You get hit on all the time— you’re gorgeous— but you are almost never interested enough to give them the time of day. But Din? He had his fingers in your pussy after knowing you for ten minutes. How did he do that!?

It’s the early evening. You lie in your bed visualizing the events over and over again, heat pooling in your core as you replay the dirty things he said to you.

While it fuels your arousal, you also feel uneasy about the interaction. He left so quickly, and he left without saying a word to you, almost like nothing had happened. You hope that Din doesn’t think less of you, that he doesn’t think you’re some hussy who is easily persuaded into letting guys she just met finger fuck her.

You are pulled away from your anxious thoughts when you hear your intercom going off. It’s your friends talking about what they’re doing tonight. You don’t really care to pay attention, but you sit straight up in your bed when you hear something about that “Mandalorian who’s visiting the Academy,” and how he’s “at the cantina in town.”

You jump out of bed and without even thinking, you grab a sweater and head toward the parlor.

Your heart is beating on the chilly walk there. You hope he’s surprised to see you, you hope he’s excited to see you. You’re gonna act casual, yeah, like you didn’t even know he was there. No big deal! You’re just going to the cantina to hang with your friends. And then you see eachother, and bing bang boom, you guys are back in your room fucking while he calls you his little slut. Yes. This is gonna go great.

It’s a Friday night and the cantina is bustling. People are dancing, drinking, and gambling. It’s so loud that you can barely hear yourself think. As you make your way through the rowdy crowd, you spot Din’s helmet over the hordes of people. He is sitting in a somewhat secluded booth in the corner of the restaurant.

You proceed a few steps forward, lightly pushing people to get through the crowd, and then, your heart drops. He’s not sitting alone. There’s a girl, a woman, a sex worker, wrapped in his arm.

You stand there for a moment as everything goes quiet, you stare at Din and the beautiful woman in a tight short dress sitting beside him. She’s talking to him, saying things into the side of his helmet as he sits there looking forward with his arm casually draped around her, man spreading and all.

Din’s head turns and that’s when he notices you, standing there among the crowd of people in that same short high waisted skirt and a cropped sweater of the same color.

You feel something fall deep in your chest as you realize that he sees you. You blink a few times as the rest of your senses come back, humiliation and embarrassment overcoming you as you quickly turn around and stumble out of the bar.

You make your way into the dark street and take a few deep breaths before running back to the Academy. You're fighting off tears as you feel the cold air pinching every bit of your exposed skin.

You can’t believe that you let yourself become smitten by someone who was such an asshole. He mistook you for a whore, he insulted your combat skills, he pressed you to let him fuck you! You should have expected this.

A tear rolls down your cheek. Why did you think he liked you? He didn’t. He didn’t like you. And he didn’t want to fuck you, he just wanted to fuck someone, and you were the closest one to him. You let him use you. He must do this kind of shit all the time with women, you were nothing special.

You get back to your room and bury yourself under your covers, wanting to escape so badly from this reality.

TO BE CONTINUED

The Visit Part Two

The Visit Part Three

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Masterlist

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Taglist:

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