#the empty bowl

[boydykedevo]

I remembered this post I made a while ago and now I’m curious so

(I can’t stop you, but I’d ask you not answer if you don’t listen to any McElroy shows!)

[wheelie-butch]

can I just say, I love the nanofather. I will never get tired of the nanofather. I believe there is deep and inscrutable lore to the nanofather. I believe Justin when he says he's hearing this stuff for the first time. I hope the nanofather continues even after Steeplechase finishes. I want the nanofather in mbmbam AND the empty bowl.

[mcelquotes]

Take me down to crunch time city, where the grass is cereal and the girls are... also cereal.

Justin McElroy

[huffy-the-bicycle-slayer]

Listening to The Empty Bowl (a lesser known McElroy podcast) and I was absolutely blasted away when Justin gave actual actionable advice for a question.

[erksome]

✨late night cereal✨

(on Redbubble)

[queerforscience]

When you get to the end of The Empty Bowl episode you're listening to while trying to go to sleep but you're still awake

[haveyouheardthispodcast]

[jacksgreysays]

Went on a quest for frosted lemon cheerios, decided to write a little silly ASMR monologue to send in to The Empty Bowl podcast:

Hello Dan, Justin, and my fellow sailors of the vast, milky sea. My name is Sofia and I’d like to tell you about my harrowing quest for gold and glory: ie, the limited edition frosted lemon cheerios.

To set the scene, I currently live in northern California and in the way of many Californians I do not often grocery shop—or, at least, not at stores that carry American cereals. Several episodes ago, Dan expounded on the merits of the limited edition frosted lemon cheerios with such enthusiasm even in ASMR tones that I knew I had to try it. With that, and my own life long obsession with lemon flavored foods, I began my search.

Like any fool at the start of their journey, I underestimated the trials and tribulations I would go through:

The first grocery store I tried, Safeway, I arrogantly assumed would have the treasure I sought. But when I went to the cereal aisle, I did not find it. Classic, frosted, apple cinnamon, very berry, chocolate strawberry, strawberry banana, all of these were present, but no frosted lemon—not even an empty gap in the shelves to show that Safeway even stocked it. Disheartened, I left, but the siren call would haunt my dreams.

A few days later, I tried another grocery store, Lucky’s. Despite its name, this again ended in failure. A few days after that, I tried Target thinking, perhaps, it’s a matter of regionality—that the far reach of Target would guarantee the presence of that which I sought.

And again, failure.

Possesssed, I researched online for more details on my white whale—I even considered buying from Amazon, but at thirteen dollars a box plus shipping, I would not make that deal with the devil. And so I followed the trail of clues: I knew definitively it had been released at Kroger’s but there are no Kroger’s in my area. I knew there was a connection between Kroger’s and Ralph’s, but when I searched for a Ralph’s in my area the only hint of it was a former Ralph’s that had been replaced by a Walmart. In desperation, I went.

For a fourth time, failure.

I considered: would I have to live my life absent of frosted lemon cheerios or would I have to sell my soul and give in to Jeff’s foul domination of e-commerce?

This dilemma tormented me until I remembered: for Mother’s Day I would be traveling to southern California with its own set of regional grocery stores.

And so I went to the land where Ralph’s still existed, and as if a sign from the cereal gods themselves, when I walked through those sliding doors the cereal aisle was directly in front of me. In the cheerios section I was again presented with the same varieties as before, but there was a strange gap in the shelves above my eye line. Straining, I saw it: a single box of frosted lemon cheerios stood. Finally, my quest was complete.

But then, as if to reward me for my perseverance, a second box was revealed. However, with it a final test: it was placed so deep into the shelf, it was out of reach. Thankfully, my sister, taller and thus with a longer wingspan was also present, but even she had to use another box of cereal to knock it down enough to be within her grasp.

And so, riding the high of success, I bought three boxes of cereal that day: the two boxes of frosted lemon cheerios and the one box we used to reach them which was, thankfully, blueberry cheerios and which I hope will be a good mix in for those good, good complementary flavors.

After having consumed an entire box of frosted lemon cheerios, I can confirm that all the heartbreak and effort was worth it.

[atdawn]

MERLIN | 5.07 A Lesson in Vengeance

[thepeacefulgarden]

[streetmatt]

Empty bowl.

By Matti Merilaid.

[diabolicjoy]

something about the way a parent can destroy something you made (or own), and then feel so bashful about it that they avoid making a big deal out of it. am i supposed to say that it’s ok and not cry…

[mcelquotes]

I'm old enough to remember when the Baptists invented puppy chow!

Justin McElroy

[paunchbunny]

im at an influencers' party tonight and they all left for da club and im here alone with so much weed and so many leftover snacks this is the kinda shit I can't even dream up when I'm horny fr

[berryblu-arts]

basically mob psycho ep...4, 5? cant remember lol, anyways i love the teru introduction hdsfhjsfhk

i can feel in my bones this has already been done a gazillion times, but!!! two cakes!!! also it was pretty fun <3<3<3

[in-my-loki-feels]

🎃Trick or treat!🎃

We can never have enough fooling around in the Archives, right? Here is an early S1 scene that I started and then forgot I had in a doc somewhere. 🤭

CW mildly NSFW/suggestive

Loki hadn’t been out of the time collar long before he pounced. Mobius had thought he would run, actually, like he had when he first arrived and managed to get free. Mobius should’ve forced Loki to stick to Miss Minutes videos, instead of letting him tag along like a naughty puppy, because now he was nipping at Mobius’ heels with question after question. It was a miracle he shushed when the Archivist shot him a look.  The silence should’ve been its own warning, but Mobius was eager to break out the files on the variant and put Loki to work, so he thought he’d enjoy it while it lasted. But no sooner had he ducked between shelves, looking for the box he needed, than Loki spun him around with a hand on his shoulder and kissed him.  Mobius had expected more lead up, honestly. A little more seduction, or an appeal to how he could make Mobius’ life very interesting if Mobius let him go. Instead, Loki kissed him like he was trying to take something from him, and it was good, up until Loki bit his lip.  “Ow!” Mobius hissed, mindful of keeping his voice down. He tried to push Loki back, but Loki was pinning him to the bookshelf, grinning wildly. It was easy to see how this was the same variant who had tried to take over New York. “You need to behave or you’re going right back into that time collar.” Loki eyed him and then dove in for another rough kiss. For a brief moment, Loki was flush against him and Mobius realized they were both getting hard. The danger of being caught wasn't helping.  “Hey.” Mobius tore his mouth away and grabbed Loki’s wrists, using that to push him back. “I said, behave.” Loki looked at him a moment more, before his smile took on a wicked edge. He held Mobius’ gaze as he sank to his knees, easily pulling free from Mobius’ now-slack grip. Loki slid his hands down Mobius’ torso to the front of his slacks, all while never looking away.  “Is this better?”