#the earlier stages of my teen years was NOT it

[nervocat]

I hateeee having to wonder if feelings are platonic or romantic. I get them confused and and it isn't the greatest thing

[foldingfittedsheets]

Here’s a story about the time I almost lost my virginity. This is of course a social construct and by a broader understanding had already been lost years earlier at a sleepover with my best friend. But I digress.

I was dating a boy in high school. I shall call him Drama Boy. DB was big into theater, he made home movies and did stage performances at his high school.

Now. I must make this notation here, because the ending to this story will be savage otherwise, but DB put entirely too much of his mental well-being on my shoulders. He was often depressed and it was my job to constantly be helping him to regulate that.

The night our story took place we had been dating for eight months. During those months had been a ludicrous amount of making out and groping, even one lusty fumble that almost ended in penetration I vetoed on the grounds of not having a condom. It’s worth noting the first time we made out I felt physically sick to my stomach but I assumed that was normal.

But our parents didn’t give us much opportunity to really do anything like we imagined real sex to be. Until he came over for a movie night and my parents left on a date.

Scandalous, some might say, of my parents to leave us unchaperoned. But my parents were very blasé about sexual topics. They knew I was well educated and careful. Their leaving was possibly a gift of privacy rather than carelessness.

So when DB arrived for our movie night, we both knew This Was The Night. The night we’d lose our virginity.

We were both nervous and excited. The weight of societal pressure blanketed both of us, convincing us that this was the most momentous night of sex either of us could ever have.

DB chose a wretched movie. We sat through the first part dutifully before we started making out sloppy style. As I’d said previously, we’d done plenty of making out and hand stuff. Which is why I noticed that DB did not seem to be as… rigid as he had on other occasions.

A kinder more mature lens has softened my perspective. He was so nervous. But at the time I was a bit offended that I wasn’t arousing enough to have him standing at full mast. Still, we forged ahead.

I sat patiently while he tried to unhook my bra, boredly watching the terrible movie in the background as he soldiered manfully toward defeating the two clasps containing the bounty of my bosom while insisting he didn’t need my help. It took about five minutes.

That out of the way we made out some more. Then DB pulled out his pièce de résistance. A condom. This was a big get for him. His family, unlike mine, were horribly conservative and of the opinion that marriage was worth waiting for. So his opportunity to secure this vital piece of equipment had been slim.

In fact, it had been so slim, that what he pulled out was an:

Unlubricated

Glow in the dark

Novelty condom

From a vending machine

At the bowling alley.

I wasn’t terribly enthused about any of those qualifiers, but I held my tongue.

Then came the worst part. DB couldn’t admit that the stress of performance had unmanned him. He continued to pretend his wobbly erection could facilitate the rigorous activity of putting on a condom. He attempted to force the dry clinging rubber down his dick as it softened like pudding under his fumbling hands.

I butted in and made with more kissing, certain that seeing me naked had been such a let down that he was going limp because of me. Surely the sight of my boobies should have been enough! Because they weren’t, I was convinced he wasn’t really into this deflowering at all.

It didn’t help that my enthusiasm for this activity was fueled purely by teen hormones rather than actual sexual attraction. Perhaps he felt the same. It was one thing to watch his penis with clinical curiosity but another to think that my young boobs didn’t excite the same lust I felt toward boobs.

Nevertheless. The condom was more or less on. With momentous energy he tried to jam our anatomy together and rolled a critical failure. His penis lost all rigidity and oozed away from insertion.

Panicking and embarrassed he exclaimed, “I think I put this on wrong!”

To my horror he began trying to remove the condom and put it back on the other way. Health instructors of ages past screamed in my head that the condom had now been stretched and unrolled.

Trying to jam it back on was certainly not safe, especially given the slackness of the anatomy in question. It would certainly tear- if he could even get it back on.

I broke out in a sweat watching him attempt the magic trick of convincing a flaccid penis that it really wanted to get better acquainted with a desiccated rubber tube prison.

“I just remembered!” I exclaimed.

He looked up at me, wretched with despair.

“I promised my parents I wouldn’t have sex tonight. I just remembered! Sorry!”

This could go down in history as one of the most bold faced and terrible lies ever told, a blatant falsehood on par with declaring the sky was green. But his face broke out in a terrible relief.

He disposed of the abused condom and I resecured my bra and we resumed watching the horrible movie, both of us relieved in our own way to set down the burden of Losing Virginity.

The next day I broke up with him.

This remains to this day one of the most savage things I’ve ever done, breaking up with someone the night after impotence.

But remember, dear reader! It wasn’t just the sex! His depression had already worn away my patience and our communication. The foibles of the night before had just illuminated the gaps where we couldn’t talk to each other properly. I was constantly comforting him over something, shoring up his brain chemistry with my relentless positivity.

I’d like to say that’s all it was, and look more charitably on my young self. But truthfully my tender pride had also been badly stung that I wasn’t worth rising to the occasion for. Comforting him over this latest mishap when my feelings were hurt was more than I could swallow.

DB took the breakup very poorly. About two weeks later he lost his virginity with the new girl he was dating. He called me to brag, sniffing through the airwaves for hints that he’d hurt me back.

When I congratulated him with utter sincerity and not a whiff of jealousy he was furious.

We stopped speaking for years, except on our mutual birthday when we’d wish each other a cordial “Happy birthday.”

He messaged me out of the blue one day years later to catch up. He was working in food service now. Was it true I was a lesbian? Yes, I assured him, that was true. He thought that was pretty cool.

Then he told me about this bisexual girl he worked with who was interested in a threesome. Did I want to have a threesome with him and his bisexual coworker?

The audacity. I couldn’t believe it. My mind filled with savage retorts like, if you understand I’m a lesbian why do you think I’d want you to be part of that? Why wouldn’t I just sleep with her without you?

But I remembered the utterly ruthless way I’d dumped him and as penance I swallowed all of the things I wanted to say and instead politely told him I was seeing someone, but thanks for the offer.

And that was it. He’d managed to shoot his shot not once, not twice, but three times, and never managed a home run. He struck out that last time, and we never spoke again.

[seireiteihellbutterfly]

Promise Me

ft Nanami Kento

A/N: Some Teen!Nanami angst! IDK why but I've been wanting to write this for a while. Header and dividers all credited at the bottom. Rating: 13+, fluffy-ish Warnings: Sadness, angst, mentions of death and dying Pairing: Teen! Nanami x Reader Summary: Faced with a solo mission, reader finds themselves contemplating their life in the Jujutsu world Word Count: 2301 Nanami masterlist

With trembling hands, you type out the text message. You’re aware it’s long, more like a letter but in that moment it felt like you would crumble if you didn’t get it all out into words. 

‘Hey Kento. I hope college is going well. You sounded happy when we last spoke. I hope you’re having fun with your friends.

Upper management has assigned me a solo mission. They said it's because they are confident my abilities have reached a stage where I can handle myself and also take down the curse. I know it's because there are no other sorcerers available to accompany me.

Anyway, it's a big step, which is why I called earlier but I know that you’re busy, so I figured I’d text you instead. I leave tomorrow morning. I’m just packing all my gear right now.

And I’ll probably have dinner with my friends tonight and try not to think about the mission. You know how I get when I start overthinking. It’s probably not as big a deal as I’m making it out to be, right? Students take on solo missions all the time.

I have no reason to be scared, right? Management would never assign me to a solo mission they believed was out of my depth, right? I just keep thinking about what it’s like, not having anyone with me. I’ll have to be at my sharpest, so I’m hoping to get a good night’s sleep. 

Call me if you can. Or if not today, then sometime tomorrow? I’ll probably be on the train most of the day but we can still talk. Let me know. I love you.’ 

You hit send and look at your half-packed bag. Each time you attempt to clear your mind, your thoughts threaten to eat you alive. You were terrified at the thought of this solo mission. When management had called you to brief you about it, you had waited for them to tell you who would be accompanying you. The dread that filled your stomach when they said you’d be going alone made you feel like you were carrying around a lead weight. 

This year had been rough. It was the year that Nanami had graduated from Jujutsu High, his college acceptance all arranged, as he readied himself to leave behind the world of sorcery for good. You had attended his graduation, the doting girlfriend, tears in your eyes at how proud you were of him, but also because you knew this meant you wouldn’t see him around here anymore. No more midnight walks, or studying for exams, sneaking into each other’s dorms for little kisses and reassuring hugs. You had never thought his being one year your senior would matter until he had shown you his acceptance letter. 

There was a sense of worry there too, because college meant he was going away from you, but he had held you so tightly, whispering this didn’t change anything. You were always going to be his girlfriend. He would make it work. He didn’t want anyone else. It had been a few months and the long distance was hard but it brought you more happiness than anything around here ever did. 

You continued to pack, glancing at the clock, unable to shake the jittery feeling from your body. It felt like there were a million butterflies in your stomach, and your heart kept pounding even though you didn’t leave for the mission until tomorrow. The innocent morning sun shone through your dorm window, uncaring about the turmoil inside you. You keep glancing at your phone, hoping Nanami will reply, but the screen remains blank. Phantom vibration syndrome kicked in at one point where you could’ve sworn you heard your phone vibrate, picking it up eagerly to check, only to see nothing new on the screen. Your heart sinks with disappointment each time. You knew his schedule and that he was probably in class. He would call you when he could. He’s never not called or at least texted.

As you sit down on your bed, the overwhelming gravity of the situation hits you. You were going alone. There was no backup. If you messed up on this mission…you squeeze your eyes shut. It was one thing if you failed to exorcise the curse. That in some way brought you relief. If you didn’t exorcise it, management would simply express their disappointment and send someone else. But what if…what if…you didn’t exorcise it and the curse…

You gasp, shaking your head violently, trying to rid yourself of the thoughts of death. No, it couldn’t happen that way. You couldn’t die. What you would’ve given in that moment, to not be a sorceress, but to be a normal teenager! To go dress shopping, and enjoy prom, to start writing your own college applications. To know that your life wasn’t in danger and that you would live, live to spend another day with your friends, live to see Nanami again…

Before you knew it, tears filled your eyes, spilling onto your cheeks, and you hugged your pillow tightly for comfort. You remembered how you had cried when Nanami left for missions, out of contact for days, barely sleeping until he sent you a text that his mission was completed and that he was coming back. You remember him training you, always working on your self-defense, making sure your reflexes were honed and sharp. You remember that even when you were sent with a partner, it sometimes didn’t change a thing.

Haibara’s death still hung heavily over everyone, and you think back to Nanami’s expression when he returned from that mission, his eyes dark and solemn, regret lined heavily on his face. It was so unfair, that at the age of 16, he had to endure that. Haibara had been so kind to you as well, the best kind of senpai anyone could have asked for. Nanami never allowed himself to be emotional in front of anyone but had broken down in your arms in the privacy of his dorm room. Neither of you slept well for days after that, often jerking awake in the middle of the night, immediately texting the other for comfort. 

You wondered if something happened to you, would Nanami break down the way he did for Haibara? Would it be equal? Would it be worse?

“Please reply,” you whisper, checking your phone again. Still nothing. Did he not care that you were being sent on a solo mission? Had he finally started to enjoy his life away from Jujutsu High that he wasn’t going to answer you anymore? Frustration fills you and you resist the urge to fling your phone across the room. You curl up into a ball and keep reminding yourself that he’d never play around with your feelings, that he was probably busy, and that he’d call you as soon as he could…

The day passes by in a haze. Still no word from Nanami. You try calling him again but it says he’s unreachable. It only alleviates your trepidation. Maybe he had forgotten you. College was a whole new world after all. You scream into your pillow, allowing self-pity to overtake you. No one understood. Your friends had advised you to break up with him before he broke up with you. That he would find someone else at college, that long-distance rarely ever worked out. 

You fall asleep on your bed in a blur of confusion, unable to ruminate about your situation anymore. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

Nanami is out of breath as he hurdles through the corridors of Jujutsu High. A few students look at him in surprise and recognition, waving their hands at him as he races past, ignoring their greetings of ‘Nanami senpai!’. 

A solo mission…they had the nerve to send you on a solo mission…His breath had caught in his throat when he read your text, all other thoughts wiped blank. He’d immediately talked to his professors stating he had a family emergency and left hurriedly with nothing but his backpack. 

It took two trains to get here, one of which had gotten delayed. He couldn’t not see you before this mission, a damned solo mission, without reassuring you, without holding you tight after so many months apart. 

A left, a right, another left, then he halts in front of your dorm room and knocks softly. “Y/n?”

When you don’t open the door, he grips the handle, surprised to find it unlocked, and enters quietly. He sees you asleep on your bed, your bag set on the floor. A rush of relief and affection floods him as he sees you holding the little teddy bear he’d gifted you before leaving for college. 

‘Hold him when you miss me, yeah?’ He had said to you. You had immediately named it Teddymin, and he was currently tucked under your cheek as you slept uneasily. 

“Y/n,” Nanami says your name louder trying to rouse you, not wanting to scare you at seeing him in your dorm unexpectedly. You stir, then open bleary eyes. It was dark outside. Who was calling your name and why did it sound so familiar?

“Y/n.” Your eyes fly open and you quickly sit up, unable to believe it. 

“Kento?” You whisper his name disbelievingly, feeling tears well up in your eyes again. 

“I’m here.” He sits on the bed, drawing you close to him. You still can’t believe it. Were you dreaming? Was he really here? You grip his sleeve, hear his heartbeat, feel the warmth of his skin, and start crying unrestrainedly. All day, you had tried to keep it together, tried to convince your friends, convince yourself, that you had control over this. That you weren’t fazed about being assigned to a solo mission, that you were proud that management trusted you.

But Nanami’s presence breaks your composure, vulnerability showing through. “Why are you here?”

“Where else would I be?” he asks gently, patting your back. “I couldn’t focus in class, not after seeing your text. I’m sorry for not replying but I was basically catching trains all day to come see you.”

“You did that for me?” Your heart swells with love for him. 

“Of course. I just couldn’t…leave you alone, knowing you’re going on this mission by yourself. I had to see you.”

Silence falls between you both, listening to each other breathe. You wipe away your tears and take a steadying breath. Nanami hesitates, then asks, “Y/n, are you sure this is what you want to do? You graduate this year. You can leave all this behind.”

His words root themselves deeply in your mind and you find yourself considering it. Would it be possible to escape this? This unending cycle of fear for your life? “I don’t know. Everyone I know, everyone we know, is part of this. Could I just leave it all behind?”

“You can if you want to,” Nanami insists. “It’s hard, but trust me, it’s peaceful. I don’t want anything happening to you y/n. I’d never be able to forgive myself if I don’t give my best effort to get you away from here.” 

You know he means it, otherwise he wouldn’t have come all this way to see you. “You don’t have to make a decision now. We’ll talk about it after you get back from your mission.” He strokes your hair, reassuring you. 

“I will come back right?” There. You had asked the question that had been festering inside you all day. Nanami freezes when he hears you and his embrace tightens even more. 

“Of course you will. Why wouldn’t you?” He swallows, forcing himself to not think about any other answer to your question. After Haibara, he can’t take any more losses. He couldn’t lose you too. He’d break and probably never be made whole again. 

“I’m going to talk to Gojo. This will be your first and last solo mission.”

You wanted to protest but secretly, you’re relieved. “Would it work?”

“I can try. It’s reckless to send you without a partner.” He pulls away to frame your face in between his hands, heart breaking as he sees your look of apprehension. “Don’t worry. You will get back safely. I know your ability. You are a talented sorceress.”

Hearing his vote of confidence somehow carried more weight than management’s. “I really needed to hear that,” you say in a shaky voice. He embraces you again, gripping you so tightly it hurts but you couldn’t bring yourself to tell him to stop. 

“You’ll come back. We’ll dance together at your prom. You’ll graduate. And I’ll make sure you never have to face something like this alone again.” He says all the things he wishes for you, wishes for both of you because honestly, he can’t imagine a future without you anymore. The conviction with which he says his words fortify you, and you finally manage to pull yourself into a better headspace. 

You wish he could accompany you on this mission, but understand that management could turn this into a cascade of litigation. He had disappointed a lot of people when he had left the school, and you couldn’t risk him using his abilities since he had forfeited his privilege to use them when he had surrendered his rank and title as a sorcerer. 

He presses a chaste kiss on the top of your head. “I love you. Promise to come back safely to me.”

“I will. I promise.”

Nanami doesn’t sleep for the next few nights. Finally, after 4 days, he sees the text message from you. 

I’m back.

It was only then that he allowed himself to break down and cry, not with grief like when Haibara died, but with relief that you had made it.

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[mycurrentobsessionstuff]

I am 37 years old and sometimes I get so sad about how long I waited with transitioning.

I didn’t get to be a teenage boy with emo hair on MySpace and feeling cool in my black T-shirt.

I didn’t get to live my young adult life growing from boy to man as I tried figuring out who I was and who I wanted to be.

I didn’t get to turn 30 and feeling like I was finding my footing and opening myself up to authentic friendships and even love.

Not because I didn’t know. I’ve known since I was 11 or 12. Probably earlier. But because I’ve been living 36/37 years in fear.

Now I’m slowly approaching 40 and I feel like I just need to immediately go from coming out to being a fully adult man.

So now I feel 17 and 21 and 29 and 37 all at once and I think I have to mentally go through those stages before I can confidently move towards my 40s as a grown man.

So much time and life has been stolen from me by fear and mental illness and burnout but I can’t go backwards so I’ll do my best to move forward and give myself a break as I mentally transition as well as physically and socially.

I guess what I’m trying to say here is that kids are definitely sure and let teens transition and start living their true lives.

Love you all! Don’t forget to eat something.

[andvys]

We'll burn the sky | part eleven

Warnings: 18+, mentions of smut, angst, mentions of substance abuse, mentions of death, mentions of cheating, mentions of reader smoking cigarettes

Pairings: Rockstar!Eddie Munson x Rockstar!fem!reader | Steve Harrington x fem!reader | past Eddie Munson x Chrissy Cunningham

Summary: Corroded Coffin plays at the hideout again, friends, family and.. enemies show up

Word count: 8k+

@mysticmunson thank you for your amazing ideas as always, bestie🥺

Series masterlist

inspo for the outfit reader was wearing

-

Eddie’s words and actions kept you up all night. His touch lingered, you could still feel his lips on your neck as your mind repeated his words. 

I’m yours, I’m all yours, I’ve been yours right from the start, you have my heart, sweetheart. You’re all I want.

You stared at him with a dumbfounded expression on your face as you searched for the dishonesty in his eyes, only to find none. He was saying the truth, he wasn’t lying, he never lied about his feelings for you. 

Despite the things he said to you before, despite the girl that he kept a secret from you for months, you believed him. You finally realized that he never pretended, you were never just a placeholder, he never used you for the band. Right then, he let you see inside his mind, all his walls crumbled and he let you see everything. 

And all you saw was a broken man who found love and comfort in you.

Yes, now you know that he never lied but now you are all the more scared. You already found out what it feels like to lose him, what it feels like to live without him, what it feels like to get your heart broken by Eddie Munson

What if you will truly lose him someday? 

What if he will leave you?

What if he will find someone better? 

What if he will get sick of you and abandon you the way everyone else did? 

All these what if’s run through your mind but the one that truly matters doesn’t. 

What if he stays? 

-

The hideout is bustling, loud music is playing in the crowded bar, laughter and loud voices are heard from every corner in the bar. Eddie looks around in awe. A look of pride is lingering on his face. 

Despite performing on big stages, in front of even larger crowds, in front of thousands of people, he can’t help but feel more excited than ever. This is where it all started. No longer is the place filled with emptiness, the place is filled with people, ones that came here just for the band. A lot of them, he doesn’t even recognize. 

But he finds the five drunks, still claiming their usual table, just like they did two years ago. He talked to them earlier, all of them giving Eddie pats on the back and telling him how proud they all are. 

He smiles to himself. 

Wayne is sitting at the bar with Steve and Robin, all three of them are seemingly in a deep conversation as they wait for their drinks. 

The teens are here too, sitting around a round table, he eyes Lucas who is the most excited one out of them. He chuckles to himself, knowing that he is only excited to see you. 

After setting everything up on the stage, Eddie walks to the small backstage room to get you. He raises his fist to knock on the door but it opens just before he can do so. 

He freezes and his jaw drops. You look good, you always do but tonight, you look insanely good. 

“Jesus H Christ,” he mumbles to himself. 

He lowers his hand and takes a step back, letting his eyes rake over your body. His cheek flush red and his eyes darken as he eyes your outfit, your exposed skin, your cleavage, your beautiful face, your hair that you no doubt spend the last hour on. 

His stomach flutters and suddenly he feels very hot. 

He whispers your name in shock. 

You blush at the way he is staring at you. Crossing your arms over your chest, he suddenly groans, eyes widening as he stares at your boobs in the little top that is laced together in the middle, exposing your skin and covering your boobs just enough.

“Like what you see, Eddie?” you ask teasingly. 

He just nods, still staring at all the leather covering your skin. 

“Y-You look so fuck… so hot,” he stutters. 

You can’t even help but chuckle. That’s the first thing he has said to you after last night, after he went inside before telling you, that he is willing to wait for you. 

You wish you could go back to the way things used to be but you can’t, the pain is still so fresh and all your fears have caught up to you ever since the night you found out about her. 

You can’t be vulnerable with him, at least not yet.

But maybe you can go back to the beginning. 

“Thanks,” you smirk, “Steve helped me pick out this outfit.” 

His eyes flash with jealousy and he has to restrain himself from rolling his eyes. 

“You should’ve seen all the other outfits he made me try on, just for him.” 

He furrows his brows as his awestruck stare turns into an icy one.

“He also made me try on lingerie but that wasn’t very appropriate for the stage,” you shrug. 

“Stop that,” he mutters angrily. 

You raise your brows, smirking at him, “why?” 

“You know why.” 

You shake your head, jutting your lip out as you pretend to think, “no, I don’t.” 

He looks hot. He ditched the leather jacket he was wearing earlier, left in a muscle shirt that shows off his toned arms and tattoos. He is wearing dark pants with his trusted belt with the handcuffs. The rings you love so much and the highlight of his outfit tonight; the bandana around his head. 

You take a step towards him, giving him an innocent smile, “you look nice,” you whisper, running your hand down his arm, “I love the bandana, Eddie.” 

He looks a little speechless, as though he doesn’t understand why you are talking to him like this, why you are touching him and acting the way you used to before it all went to shit. 

The way you look at him and the way you touch him, reminds him of the way you used to do when you just met but something about you seems different now, perhaps it’s the intensity of your feelings or the pain you have gone through ever since then. 

“Thank you, sweetheart,” he whispers. 

You nod, giving him a small smile. 

“You ready for the show?” 

“So ready,” he sighs with a smile on his face, “wanna go out together?” he asks, holding his hand out for you. 

You look down at it, heart fluttering in your chest. 

You always go out hand in hand, it shouldn’t be anything new and yet something about it feels different. Perhaps it’s because you are in his hometown, about to perform in front of his friends and family and he isn’t hiding you or your relationship. 

You look back into his eyes, seeing the softness in them, it somehow makes your heart ache. 

You place your hand in his and he smiles at you. You expect him to lead you to the stage but instead he raises your hand, “give me a twirl, sweetheart,” he grins. 

“Really?” you snort, knowing that he only wants to see what the back of your outfit looks like. 

He nods. 

Shaking your head, you chuckle and give him a twirl, the groan that leaves his lips gives you satisfaction. 

His eyes almost bulge out of his skull when he looks at the way your ass looks in those tight leather pants, “holy fuck.” 

The sound of your giggle fills him with warmth. He never thought he would get to hear it again, at least not directed at him. 

He can’t explain the sudden change of your behavior towards him, yesterday you still gave him the cold shoulder, side glances and huffs of annoyance, today, things seem different. Perhaps, you finally decided to give him a second chance, maybe you believe him now, hopefully you do. 

Holding your hand makes him happy, though he can still feel the tension in your body and see the distance in your eyes. You don’t trust him and maybe you never will but he is happy to at least have you like this. He will take the teasing over the cold shoulder any day. 

When you walk out onto the stage, he intertwines his fingers with yours and gives your hand a squeeze. 

You smile at Gareth and Jeff, you haven’t seen them since your arrival in Hawkins, you can’t believe it but you missed them. 

You look up at Eddie, watching the way his eyes glow with happiness and excitement as the people cheer for him, for the band. He waves at some people he recognizes from school, ones that didn’t give him a hard time. 

He looks at Wayne, a proud smile lingers on his face as he claps for his nephew. 

He looks at his friends, eying every single one of them with a big smile on his face. 

Eddie couldn’t be more blessed to have such amazing people in his life. His uncle and his friends always supported him, they were always there, they were the ones to encourage him to live his dream, they were the ones who had faith in him and then you came along and you made his dream so much bigger. 

Despite the pain he caused you, you look up at him with a soft smile on your face, pride and love in your eyes, for a second you push it all away, the pain, the heartbreak, the sadness. You look at him. You see the emotions in his eyes, the gratitude. You are happy for him. 

You know that Eddie had a hard time growing up here. This town caused him so much pain and suffering. People treated him poorly, his father abandoned him, childhood friends turned on him, kids at school bullied him, his girlfriend broke his heart and stomped all over it. 

The man that stands in front of you is still a broken child on the inside and you can see it behind all the happiness in his eyes. 

You let go of his hand, taking a step back from him, you reach for the microphone. 

Eddie gives you a puzzled look but you don’t look at him, looking at the crowd instead as you wait for them to quiet down. 

“I love you, y/n!” Lucas yells and you can’t even help but laugh, especially when Max hits his chest with a laugh. You form a heart with your fingers at him, laughing again when he places his hand over his heart. 

Eddie chuckles at him, shaking his head. He is happy to see you getting along with his friends. 

“Hello Hawkins,” you finally speak into the microphone, “thank you for giving me such a warm welcome but first, let’s give the guys some love, let’s give the stars of Hawkins a round of applause!” you say as you look at your bandmates with a grin on your face, clapping for them. 

Gareth gets up from behind his drums and starts clapping for himself, giving the audience a cocky grin before he blows you a playful kiss. Johnny chuckles at his friend, shaking his head as he looks at the audience. 

Jeff rolls his eyes at his friend, unable to fight the smile off his face though. He looks at the large crowd, this has been the fullest the place has ever been. Corroded Coffin never had much of an audience except for the five drunks who are cheering for them like crazy now. Jeff waves at them, grinning. 

“These guys are one of the best people I know. I'm glad you all found each other and created the best band in the world. Eddie,” you pause as you turn back to him. 

His gaze softens as he looks into your eyes. His heart begins to race as you bring all the attention to him. 

“I hope you can see how loved you are,” you say, gesturing to the audience, to his friends and his uncle, “you are the most talented person I know, the best performer in the world. Thank you for letting me be a part of your dream. Now, let’s give it up for Eddie Munson, my favorite rockstar.” 

Eddie can’t even hear all the cheering, the applause and his friends cheering his name. His heart is thumping and the biggest smile is resting on his face as he looks at you, watching the way you clap for him too as you smile at him. 

He can’t even help himself, walking towards you, he grabs you, swooping you off your feet, he holds you tightly, he hears your squeal even over the cheers that just got even louder. You wrap your arms around his shoulders and hug him tightly, enjoying the moment you have been craving for so long. 

Both of you close your eyes for a moment, hearts racing and fluttering but feeling whole again as you finally hold each other again. 

He smells your perfume as your hair falls in his face. 

“Thank you,” he whispers into your ear, pressing a soft kiss to your cheek. 

“Go Eddie!” 

You both laugh at Lucas’s cheer. 

Eddie squeezes your waist as he places you back on your feet again, giving you a smile, he steps back and reaches for his microphone. 

“Thank you, guys,” he says as he looks into the audience, “we can’t start before welcoming my girl, my favorite rockstar, y/n was the one who made our band whole, she was the one who made our songs even better, the one who made it all better. Let’s give it up for the best rockstar of all time!” 

You blush at his words, watching the way he claps for you with the people. Smiling at him, you watch him get his guitar. 

While Eddie got to see your walls fall for a moment and he finally met your sweet and soft side again, he didn’t expect it to be over just as quickly as it came. The moment you started performing, you let the devil out. 

You were never shy on stage and you never had a problem being affectionate with him but today, you are different, so much more affectionate, intense and intimate. What may look like a normal performance to the audience, looks so much more intimate to Eddie. 

Your lust filled gazes, the mischievous looks in your eyes as you press yourself against him or run your fingers down his chest drives him crazy and it doesn’t even stop at that. 

As if he doesn’t already have a hard time controlling himself and his feelings, you end up getting on your knees, right in front of him. You lean back and arch your back, running your hand down your chest as you are singing your lungs out. 

Eddie’s eyes widen, he clenches his jaw as he stares at your body. You look sinful. 

Your hair is tousled, your skin is glowing, a satisfied look crosses your face as you rake your eyes down his body, winking at him before you move onto your knees, reaching your hand out to one of the girls in front of the stage, who takes it right away, eyes lighting up as she stares at you in awe. 

Eddie swallows harshly, fingers strumming the guitar as he leans forward to sing his part. He cannot tear his eyes away from you though, lingering on your ass now. God, the things he would do to you. 

He is grateful for his guitar, otherwise everyone would notice the tent in his black jeans. The thought of having to perform three more songs, seems like a torture to him and it truly ends up being torture. 

Your teasing never stopped, if anything you kept taking things further and further. 

He is enjoying himself but he does wonder what brought it on. 

When you raise your brows at him and tilt your head towards the entrance, he follows your eyes and finds her, Chrissy. Her arms are crossed and she stares at you with a scowl on her face, angry eyes flashing whenever you look her way. 

She is jealous of you, not because he loves you, not because he wants you but because you get the attention that she used to get. Chrissy never loved Eddie and thinking back to it, she knows they should have been nothing more than friends, perhaps things could have been better that way but it’s no use to ponder over what could’ve been. 

She doesn’t hate you but she hates that you were the reason for him to turn his back on her. Her anger only sparks when she looks at Jason who stands next to her with a smirk on his face as he eyes you with a hungry gaze in his eyes, the one that doesn’t go unnoticed by Eddie either as he finds him staring you down like some hungry animal. 

Eddie’s possessiveness gets the best of him and he ends up pulling you into his chest, leaning his forehead against yours as he grabs your microphone to sing with you. You smirk at him, licking your lips as his hand slides down to your lower back. 

You are his and he is yours and he wants everyone to know. 

-

After the concert, you and Eddie get pulled away by his and your new friends, they are still cheering you on, gushing about your performance. You smile as you watch Eddie being pulled into a hug by Dustin and his uncle. 

Wayne gives you a hug, patting your shoulder as he compliments your voice. Your heart warms at his words and the smile he gives you. You feel grateful for his kindness and you are very happy for Eddie to have someone as amazing as Wayne in his life. 

“Thank you so much,” you smile at him, “you must be so proud of Eddie.” 

He nods, “I am,” he chuckles as he glances at his nephew, “boy was always a troublemaker but I knew he was special.” 

“Yeah,” you smile, “he is very special.” 

The smile on Wayne’s face grows even bigger when he sees the way your eyes soften as you watch Eddie. 

“Hey Wayne, come here,” Eddie calls for him, “I gotta tell you something.” 

“Yeah, it’s super important,” Dustin chuckles. 

Wayne grabs his beer, excusing himself with a smile before he turns to Eddie. 

“Hey Rockstar,” Robin speaks into your ear as she comes up behind you, wrapping her arms around your shoulders, she pulls you back into her, “can I take you out on a date? Your performance did something to me.” 

You giggle at her words, turning to look at her with a smirk on your face, “sure, where are you taking me?” 

“My place,” she winks, flashing her pearly whites at you. 

You raise your brows at her, giggling, “let’s go,” you purr jokingly as you reach for her hand. 

“Whoa whoa,” Steve gasps as he interrupts your playful flirting, “why are you stealing her from me, Robin? Let me enjoy the groupie life for as long as I can,” he jokes, rolling his eyes. 

“Sorry, Stevie,” you pout, “I found my new groupie.” 

He clutches his heart, “ouch,” he mumbles, “and here I thought we had something special.” 

You slap his arm, laughing, “shut up.” 

Out of the corner of your eye, you see Lucas and Max walking towards you. You turn towards them, smiling at the teens. Before stopping in front of you, Lucas already throws his hands up, eyes flashing with excitement, “you were so amazing!” he exclaims before he grabs Max’s hand again. 

“Yeah, you were so freaking cool,” Max smiles, “and I love your outfit, you look badass!” 

“You two are so sweet,” you say, smiling at the both of them, “thank you so much, guys.” 

Not only did you meet Steve and Robin, who quickly became some of your closest friends, you also met these two, their excitement whenever they see you makes you happy. Meeting them and the rest of the teens was one of your favorite parts about being coming to Hawkins, Eddie wasn’t lying when he told you about how amazing they all are. 

“You guys should totally come to LA when we’re back there,” you smile. 

“Oh my god,” Lucas mumbles, “we would love to, right?” he asks, grinning at Max. 

Her eyes widen, “duh, of course we would love to come to LA.” 

“Yeah, I would love that too,” Steve says, “but I still think that you should hire me as your stylist.” 

Max and Robin laugh at his words, “you?” 

You chuckle at the offended look on his face when he watches them eye him up and down, “uh yes, me,” he rolls his eyes, “who did you think went shopping with her?” he says, pointing to your outfit. 

“Yeah, Steve actually gives some pretty good fashion advice.” 

“Thank you,” he nods at you with a smile on his face. 

You turn around when you feel someone staring at you. He is standing by the pool table, a cocky look on his face as he eyes you up and down, next to him no other than Chrissy causing your smile to fall. 

You know who he is; Jason Carver. Blue eyes, blond hair, the mean look in his eyes and the expensive clothes are enough to give away his identity but then again, there must be ten Jason Carver’s in this town. Still, he stands out in the crowd, well, him and Chrissy stand out with their bright and fancy clothes, the disgusted looks on each of their faces as they look at the people around them. 

A sudden surge of anger runs through you, he is the one who made Eddie’s life a living hell, both of them. 

Your anger only intensifies when your eyes fall on Eddie, who is talking to a girl now. A bright smile is on his face, eyes flashing as he nods at whatever she is saying. 

Your heart drops, a weird feeling settles in your chest as you eye them. 

She is beautiful, short dark waves frame her face perfectly, her tanned skin looks soft under the dim light, she has tattoos on her right arm, ones that Eddie is touching now. 

Oh god, what is that feeling in your chest and in your stomach? 

He leans closer to her and it’s almost enough for you to leave, not wanting to see this. It was bad enough to find out about Chrissy, to see her kiss him, to see them hold hands but somehow this is worse. 

Suddenly, his eyes meet yours, a surprised look takes over his face when he sees you staring at him with a sour expression. He winks at you, he fucking winks at you before he goes back to the conversation. 

What the fuck? 

She raises her hand towards his face, touching his curls. Irritation and anger bubbles inside of you and you can’t even stop the curse word from falling. You want nothing more than to rip her hands off of him and drag him away. 

But he is letting her touch him and he even finds enjoyment in it, especially when his eyes find yours. 

Eddie has never done anything like this before. Sure he talked to his fans, girls that wanted to be his groupies so bad but Eddie never showed interest in them like that, he never even let them get too close, the conversations were polite, about the band or other interests he might share with them and that’s all. He never gave you a reason to feel jealous, you couldn’t even feel true jealousy when it came to Chrissy but right now, you have that ugly feeling in your chest and it makes you realize that you don’t want to see him with another girl. 

You down the drink that Steve ordered for you a while ago before you walk away from him and Robin, ignoring their confused glances as you walk towards Eddie. You push past a few people, giving them polite smiles. 

“No, it looks good but I still think that you should cut your hair.” You hear her say, you want to roll your eyes and scoff. 

Eddie’s eyes fall on you, his eyes light up. 

“I think his hair looks amazing like this,” you swoop in, stopping next to Eddie, you look at her with a smile on your face.

Her eyes widen as they lock with yours, her lips part in surprise and she blinks for a few seconds before she opens her mouth to speak, “o-oh my god, hi,” she stutters, “I’m such a big fan, y-you’re amazing and you look amazing,” she says as she takes a step back to look at you, “I’m Tara.” 

“Thanks,” you say, giving her a smile that doesn’t reach your eyes and that’s something that Eddie notices right away, he also notices the anger in your eyes and the jealousy. 

The girl doesn’t notice anything though, her eyes are wide, staring at you in shock as though she didn’t just see you singing on stage. 

Her giddiness would have been cute if you weren’t so distracted by the awful feelings inside of you. 

“Tara was just telling me that my hair would look better if it was shorter,” Eddie says, looking down at you with a smirk. 

You are jealous and that is something that fills him with excitement, not because he wants you to feel that way, you absolutely have no reason to feel that way but because this proves to him that you still want him, that you still have feelings for him, that you don’t want to see him with someone else because he belongs with you. 

You shake your head, stepping closer to Eddie, “no, I love your hair like this.” 

He notices the aggression behind your voice, the possessiveness in your eyes. It makes him crave you even more, it makes him want to kiss you right here, in front of all these people so he can show you that he only wants you, that he is all yours. 

Eddie notices the way Tara is staring at you and it makes the situation all the more amusing. 

He continues his conversation with her, fighting the smug look on his face, especially when you keep glaring daggers into him. You can hear your thoughts, you are mad, downright pissed, especially when she reaches out to touch his arm again. 

“I always wanted to get a bat tattoo.” 

“Oh, you should totally get one, it would look cool on you.” 

You squint your eyes and Eddie almost bursts into laughter. Your jealousy is something so unnecessary but it gives him hope. 

You still want him. 

And he would be lying to himself if he said that your possessiveness isn’t hot, especially when you finally have enough and drag him away from the girl after coming up with some lame excuse. Eddie can’t even contain the smile on his face. Your hand is holding onto his as you pull him into the backstage room, not wasting a second to slam him against the wall after closing the door. 

He almost moans at your action, especially when you press yourself against him. 

“What the hell was that, Eddie?” 

“What was what?” he smirks. 

The angry pout on your face makes you look both cute and sexy.

“Why were you flirting with her?” 

“I wasn’t–”

“I thought you said that you’re mine, that you belong to me,” you mumble, tilting your head as you look up at him with a frown on your face. 

He stares into your eyes and at your lips, “but you said that you don’t want me anymore,” he mumbles. 

You blink, sighing, you lean even closer to him. 

“You are mine, Eddie.” 

The hopeful and longing feeling has never been stronger than in this moment, especially when you stand on your tippy toes, brushing his long curls back, you latch your lips onto his neck the way he did to you the night at the roller rink. 

His eyes flutter closed and a sigh leaves his lips, butterflies going crazy in his stomach as you begin to kiss his neck. His hands fall to your waist, grabbing you tightly and pulling you flush against him. 

Out of all the things that he expected to happen tonight, this isn’t what he expected but god, does he love it. 

“I didn’t like the way she was touching you,” you mumble against his skin. 

He can’t even help but smirk, you are so clueless. 

He moans when you find his sweet spot, kissing and sucking on his skin, you mark him up, wanting to show everyone who he belongs to and he will wear those marks proudly. He enjoys himself and the things you say to him as you continue to kiss him.

So long he has gone without your touch. Sleepless nights and restless days haunted him ever since the night he lost you. He has been thinking of you day and night, craving your touch and longing to feel you in his arms, to feel your lips on his skin, to feel your love. 

He whimpers your name and you almost grow weak in the knees at the sound. 

“Baby,” he whispers, running his hands up and down your back now, a smug smile making it’s way on his face, “as much as I love this, you gotta know something.” 

“What?” you mumble as you pull away to face him. 

“She was more into you than me,” he smirks, hands gripping your waist tighter so you don’t walk away. 

He watches the way your brows furrow and he chuckles, “she’s like super gay, sweetheart.” 

Your puffy lips part and realization flashes in your eyes, “oh,” you whisper as you start blushing, suddenly drawing back as you grow embarrassed and annoyed, “why didn’t you tell me?” you mumble angrily, slapping his arm lightly. 

He bursts into laughter. 

Rolling your eyes, you push his hands off of you, suddenly feeling like escaping the situation but Eddie has different plans, he grabs your hand and pulls you back, this time he slams you against the wall though, pinning both wrists against the wall. 

“What do you think you’re doing?” 

He leans down, copying your actions, he moves your hair back and latches his lips onto your neck, kissing the spots above the hickey he gave you. 

“Eddie–”

“You know, I’m flattered,” he whispers as he kisses down your neck until his lips are right beneath your collarbone, sucking on your skin, he leaves more visible hickeys, “I’m glad to know that you still want me.” 

You whimper at his touches, throwing your head back against the wall, you let him touch you and kiss you again, even though everything in you screams at you to push him away. 

The cold metal of his rings sends shivers down your spine as he runs his hands down your back, you mewl at the feeling of his hands squeezing your ass. 

“I’ve wanted to do this ever since I’ve seen your ass in these pants,” he groans against your skin, “you’re so fucking sexy, baby.”

He shoves his leg between your thighs, pressing it against your center. 

“Eddie,” you moan, “s-stop.” 

“I’m yours, you already know that, sweetheart,” he whispers, “but I hope you know that you are mine, you’re not Steve’s or anyone else’s, you’re mine.” 

“Am I?” you ask, whimpering when you feel him against your stomach. 

“Mhmm, you are mine,” he says, pulling away from your chest, he stares at the marks he left behind in satisfaction before he faces you again, smirking at the lust filled eyes. Wrapping his hand around your throat, he stares at your lips. The urge to kiss you is so bad but he doesn’t, he leans in though, staring at your eyes and the way they widen when he gets closer to you. He hears the hitch in your breath and the way you tense up slightly. 

His lips touch the corner of your mouth, placing an ever soft kiss there. 

“I know you still want me.” 

You look into his eyes. To someone else, he would look smug and arrogant and yes, he does but there is also softness in his eyes and hope. 

“I know you miss me.” 

Yes, you do. 

“I miss you,” he whispers, “I miss being with you, I miss having you in my arms, I miss kissing you,” he says as he places another kiss to the corner of your mouth, “I miss hearing those pretty sounds you make when I touch you.” 

No, no, no….

His words and his touches make you feel dizzy, you want to throw yourself at him, you want to kiss him, you want him to take you. 

You can’t even help but stare at his lips and lean in a little. You want him so bad, you want him to kiss you until you're breathless, you miss him, you miss the feeling of him too. 

Just as you’re about to say ‘fuck it’ and smash your lips against his, something that definitely doesn’t go unnoticed by him, he pulls away, letting go of you and taking a few steps back, a smirk appearing on his face when he sees the irritated and confused look on your face. 

“But you wanted me to stay away from you, so I’ll do that.” 

Is he serious? 

“If you want me to stay, just say so.” 

But of course you won’t tell him to stay, not only are you confused and irritated, you are also really stubborn. 

Rolling your eyes, you scoff, shoulders slumping as you lean back against the wall. 

Eddie chuckles, “you know where to find me,” he says before leaving the room, slamming the door shut and leaving you standing there. 

He walks back into the crowded room, the smug look still lingering on his face. He finds Steve and Robin hanging out with Jeff and Gareth, he orders himself a drink before he joins them, all of them in the middle of a heated conversation about what Christmas movie is the best. Eddie doesn’t listen to them though, instead he keeps his eyes on the door in the dark hallway, waiting for you to come out of the room and when you do, he is not met with the expression he expected. 

You look annoyed and frustrated as you push past a few people, coat in your hand as you make your way towards the entrance, you left your handbag behind but he can see the pack of cigarettes in your hand. He follows you with his eyes, chuckling when you turn around to look at him, your brattiness comes out when you roll your eyes at him again. 

He drinks his beer, waving at you, he laughs when he sees you mumbling something under your breath before you walk out. 

Placing the bottle on the table, he gets up to follow you but before he can even take a step towards the door, Wayne calls his name, waving him over to his friends, “come here, boy.” 

Steve raises his head to look at Eddie, watching him leave when his eyes fall on Chrissy who rushes out of the bar, moments after you.

-

The fresh air cools you down a little. The cold kissing your warm cheeks. Closing your eyes, you take a deep breath before you place the cigarette between your lips, a stupid habit you developed over the past few months. You don’t always smoke and probably go through only one or two packs a month. 

Rummaging through your pocket, you look for the lighter, groaning in annoyance when you find none, you don’t pay mind to the door closing or the footsteps on the snowy ground, too busy hoping to find your trusted lighter in the other pocket. 

“Hey.” 

You freeze, the sound of her voice causing you to tense up. Taking the cigarette between your thumb and forefinger, you pull it away and turn to face her. 

“Chrissy..” 

Her brows are raised, a false smile on her face as she looks you up and down. 

“Can I help you?” 

She shrugs, smiling at you as her eyes meet yours. 

She looks sweet, she sounds sweet, her smile is pretty, overall she looks like a pretty and kind girl but you can see right through her, though you can see how she was able to fool Eddie. 

“I just wanna warn you.” 

You can’t even help but chuckle at her words, at the faked concern in her eyes. 

“Oh, about what?” 

“About Eddie,” she says, taking a step towards you, “he is not who you think he is. You know, sweet and loyal– but you know that already, I mean, he cheated on me with you so..” 

You frown at her words, wanting to defend him but you opt to hear her out first, curious about the things she has to say. 

“Eddie may seem like a good guy–”

“He is a good guy,” you say, interrupting her. 

She huffs a little but the polite look on her face remains. 

“Is he? He cheated and he lied to both of us.”

Your eyes dart away from her, a sigh leaving your lips as you cross your arms over your chest. 

“How long has he kept me a secret, y/n?” she asks, walking even closer to you, “all this time, right?” 

Your clenched jaw and the annoyed look in your eyes gives her the answer that she’s waiting for. 

“He never told you anything about me because he knew that you wouldn’t want him if he did,” she shrugs, “he used you.” 

“Did he?” you ask, eyes meeting her’s again. 

She nods, “yeah, I mean why else would he want you to join the band?”

“I don’t know,” you shrug, dropping your arms, you smile at her, “you tell me, he was your boyfriend.” 

She squints her eyes and tilts her head. 

“He knew who you were, he knew who your dad was. I mean, did you really believe him when he told you that he didn’t know you? His uncle loves your dad’s music and as far as I remember, you were in magazines before you even joined the band, so do you really think that Eddie hasn’t seen you before?” 

Her words cut deep but you don’t show it, the amused smile on your face irritates her and you can see it as the nice girl facade begins to crumble. 

You swallow harshly, blinking as you stare into her cold eyes. You would be lying if you said that her words didn’t make your stomach drop a little. 

She is getting under your skin and she knows it. 

“Eddie called me after he met you, he told me how he hit the ‘jackpot’,” she chuckles in satisfaction, “he knew that he would finally get what he always wanted with you by his side.” 

When Steve told you about her, he didn’t leave out her special ability to lie and yet, you easily believe her, not because you would ever trust her but because those things lingered in the back of your mind ever since that night in Cincinnati. 

“And look, he did get it all. The album, the fame, the tour, the money and that’s all thanks to you. He needed you. I mean thanks to you, he isn’t some useless freak anymore.” 

Your breathing quickens, heart racing in your chest as you stare at her. 

“You are pretty, y/n,” she smiles, “and your dad is– I’m sorry, was famous, that’s why people like you so much, that’s why he likes you so much but Eddie rarely ever sticks to one girl as you can tell. He will grow sick of you and once that happens, he will run the way he always does.” 

‘Don’t believe her, believe him’ you tell yourself, you know what she is trying to do. She is trying to manipulate her, the way she manipulated him before. 

You push the pain away, the insecurities and the doubt. 

You think about the things Steve told you about Chrissy, about Eddie and her, about their relationship. How she lied to him, how she treated him, how she cheated and manipulated him all these years. 

Anger rushes through you, she sabotaged her own relationship and now she is trying to sabotage you and Eddie. 

“You know what, Chrissy?” 

She tilts her head, giving you another one of her sweet smiles. 

Neither of you notice the person walking out of the bar, both too focused on each other. 

“Eddie is the sweetest person I know, the best person I’ve ever met and yeah, what he did wasn’t right and I won’t excuse that but he should’ve left your sorry ass a long time ago. You never deserved him. He is way too good for you, he was always way too good for you. You used him, you manipulated him, you treated him like shit and cheated on him and now you’re standing here in front of me and have the nerve to act like the victim? You’re an awful person, Chrissy. If you would’ve treated him right, he would’ve never done this to you, he wouldn’t leave, he wouldn’t lie and he certainly wouldn’t cheat. This is all on you, ” you say angrily, shaking your head at her, “You’re a fucking idiot, Chrissy.” 

Her lips part and she stares at you in both shock and anger. 

“I’m an idiot?” she scoffs, pointing to herself. 

“Yeah,” you nod, “I know he gave everything he could, his love, his heart, I mean he wrote songs for you, you don’t just write them about anyone, he loved you and you broke his heart.” 

You search for the guilt and the regret in her eyes and maybe there is some, somewhere behind all the anger. 

“He was always happy with me.” 

You can’t even stop the laugh from escaping. Shaking your head, you look behind her, finally noticing Steve, who looks between the two of you with a concerned look on his face. 

“Oh, is that so?” you ask, looking back at her, “then why did he leave?” 

Your words irritate her and you can see it clearly, it only makes you want to throw more fuel into the fire. 

“If he was so happy with you, why did he run away from you?” 

She frowns and crosses her arms, huffing as she looks away. 

“If he was so happy with you, then why was he so desperate for me? Why did he feel the need to come crawling into my bed?” 

She clenches her jaw, she is bouncing her leg, cheeks growing red from the anger. 

“Chrissy?” 

Three pairs of eyes land on the blond man as he steps out into the cold as well. He furrows his brows as he finds Steve standing by the door, he sizes him up before he turns to look at her, eyes moving between the two of you. 

“Everything okay?” he mumbles, walking towards her. 

“Yeah,” she whispers, her big eyes and pouty lips making her look vulnerable. She steps towards him, taking his hand. 

You roll your eyes, scoffing at the innocent act of hers. Stepping away from her, you make your way towards Steve. 

“Did you know that Eddie used to sell drugs?” 

You halt in your tracks, eying Steve for a moment, he shakes his head at you, begging with his eyes to ignore her words but you still whirled back around. 

Chrissy stares at you with a look in her eyes that you should probably be scared of.

You shrug, “yeah, so?”

“He also sold heroin and cocaine.” 

Your mouth twists and shivers run down your spine, you know exactly where this is going. 

“Did you know that he uses it too?” she asks, tilting her head, “go to his trailer right now, you’ll find some.” 

No… 

“He used to snort cocaine like every night.” 

“Chrissy,” Steve warns. 

“Do you really wanna be with someone like that? Someone like your dad?”

Your blood runs cold, you freeze and your eyes widen as you stare at her in confusion. 

“You really loved your dad, didn’t you?” she asks, pouting, “it must have been so hard for you to find him dead on the bathroom floor with that disgusting needle sticking in his skin.”

All color drained out of your face the moment those words left her lips, angry tears well up in your eyes. 

“That’s enough,” you hear Steve say as he walks towards you, he looks at you in concern, seeing the angry and pained look in your eyes, “let’s go, y/n,” he whispers, placing his hand on your shoulder but you don’t move, you hold your chin up high and raise your brows, urging her to continue. 

“You will find Eddie just like you found him. Are you gonna survive that a second time?"

Steve could see the way her words hit you. He doesn’t know whether you want to scream or to cry but it breaks his heart to see you like this. 

“Leave her alone, Chrissy,” Jason mumbles, rolling his eyes as he tugs at her hand, “let them ruin each other, that trailer trash finally found himself a princess.” 

She chuckles at his words. 

“Dude,” Steve warns, glaring at the former jock, “shut the hell up.” 

“You wanna say something to me, King Steve?” he says mockingly, “you think I’m scared of you?” 

“You should be,” you mutter, pushing away all the shock and pain, “your little girlfriend over here has been trying to fuck him for the past two years, all he has to do is whistle and she’ll come running like a dog.” 

Chrissy gasps at your words but he only frowns at you. 

Steve snorts but covers it up with a cough. 

“You’re Jason, right?” you ask, walking towards the blond. 

“Yeah.” 

“Why don’t you take your girlfriend and get the fuck out of here, you clearly don’t belong here,” you mutter angrily as you step closer to him, eyeing his white button down beneath the black coat,  “this isn’t some concert sponsored by your shitty church.” 

He grins at you, irritating you further. 

“Oh yeah, I just wanted to see what that freak made out of his life, didn’t think he would ever make it out of the trash park, I think he fit in there pretty well. That piece of garbage–” 

Your fist meets his face before he can even finish his sentence.

“Fucking asshole.”

He grunts in pain as he stumbles back, Chrissy shrieks as she rushes to his side, “Jason!” 

He pushes her hand away, holding his hand in front of his eye, “you crazy bitch!” 

Another fist meets his face but this time it isn’t yours, it’s Eddie’s.

If it wasn’t for Chrissy holding him up, he would’ve dropped to the ground. He clutches his nose, grunting and groaning in pain. 

“You wanna say that again, Carver?”

Your heart begins to pound in your chest as you look at Eddie, who stares at the blond in anger. Jason pushes Chrissy away about to move towards Eddie. 

Steve grabs your waist and pulls you back, knowing that you will jump in front of Eddie, “that’s enough, troublemaker,” he mumbles as he holds you against him. 

Chrissy jumps in between both men, placing her hands on Jason’s chest, “Jason, stop! Let’s just go, you’re bleeding already!” 

He tries to push her away but she doesn’t budge, “please.” 

“Yeah, listen to your girlfriend, Jason,” Eddie spits.

The tension is high and the anger is all around you as you all stare each other down. 

“Get the fuck out of here!” Eddie yells at him. 

Jason scoffs, “fucking prick,” he mumbles. 

Chrissy looks back to you, intense and angry eyes staring at you. 

“You’re gonna regret that.” 

“Just fuck off, Chrissy,” you mumble. 

She rolls her eyes, scoffing at you and Eddie before she leaves with Jason. 

“Jesus,” Steve mumbles, finally letting go of you, “are you okay?” he asks with a soft tone in his voice. 

Eddie turns to you as well, rushing towards you, his concerned eyes are the first thing you see when you look at his face, he grabs your hand, checking your knuckles for any injuries but you pull your hand away and look down, “I’m fine.” 

You take a deep breath and close your eyes, the moment you feel yourself relaxing. Your tears come back, threatening to spill. 

Steve whispers your name, still staring down at you in worry. What Chrissy said about your dad was true, he saw it in your eyes when she said it. 

“W-What happened?” Eddie asks as he looks between you and him. 

Steve avoids his eyes, not knowing what to say. 

Your breathing quickens, eyes burning as you open them. 

How does she know? 

“C-Can someone take me home, please?” you asked brokenly. 

Both men stare at you in concern and sadness, wanting nothing more than to pull you into a hug. 

Eddie glances at Steve who gives him a sad smile and a look that tells him; she needs you now. 

“I’ll walk you home, sweetheart,” Eddie whispers. 

“Do you want me to drive you?” 

Eddie shakes his head, “no, it’s fine, the motel isn’t that far away.” 

“Yeah,” you say, raising your head to look at Steve, you try to give him a smile, “see you tomorrow?” 

He nods, taking your hand, he squeezes it softly, “yeah, call me later if you need me, okay?” 

Your gaze softens, squeezing his hand back, you smile, “okay, good night, Stevie.” 

“Good night, y/n,” he whispers, pulling you closer, he kisses the top of your head, “I’m sorry about what happened.” 

“It’s okay, I’ll be okay.” 

Your words worry Eddie even more, he frowns, heart aching in his chest when he sees the glint of sadness in your eyes. He reaches for your hand after you pull away from Steve. 

The first five minutes of your walk are spent in silence. You don’t speak up and neither does he, despite the concern and the anger he still feels as he thinks of Chrissy and Jason. 

You sniffle, trying to keep the tears from spilling. You look ahead, watching the snow fall, painting everything even whiter than before. The cold wind is harsh and it only makes your tears well up even more. 

A hollow feeling settles inside of you. 

Images of your dad laying dead on the bathroom floor are back in your mind, images you always try to push out, you don’t want to think about it, you hate thinking about it. 

You feel nauseous and scared when you think of Eddie being in his place. 

Was she telling you the truth? 

Eddie never gave any signs that he was using drugs. He never wiped his nose after leaving the bathroom, he never sneaked away, his pupils looked normal, his skin was clean, his behavior was normal and yet, her words left you feeling sick and anxious. 

You can’t do this. 

You can’t lose him. 

You can’t go through this again. 

“I can’t do this.” 

You stop walking and let go of his hand. Eddie halts in his tracks, looking down at your hand before he glances at you, “w-what?”

Your bottom lip quivers. You don’t look up at him, you can’t. 

“I can’t do this again,” you mumble.

Your hands are shaking, not from the cold but from the fear. His heart breaks all over when he sees how broken and scared you look. Rushing towards you, he cups your cheeks, “what are you talking about?” he whispers as he tries to get you to look into his eyes. 

“I can’t stay in the band.” 

His stomach drops, eyes flashing with fear, “what?” 

Tears brimmed your eyes as you finally looked up at him, “are you using drugs?” 

You search for the truth in his eyes but you only find shock and confusion. 

“I– what?” 

-

tagging mutuals and friends! @prettyboyeddiemunson @littledemondani @wroteclassicaly @corrodedcorpses @mysticmunson @aftermidnightwriting @imjuststeddietrashatthispoint @sherrylyn628 @yearwalker96

[hellcheeriest]

i bet hes never had a backstreet guy

Twitch Streamer!Eddie x Single Father!Steve

Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Summary: Steve and Dustin arrive at the convention, Steve finds Eddie more attractive in person, Eddie finds Steve attractive in general, Robin and Chrissy begin to figure some things out.

Content warnings: Slight age gap (Steve is 31, Eddie is 26) Steve feels as though he's too old to be acting like he is (I know 31 isn't old! Steve just grew up too fast as a teen dad, so he feels like his mind is beyond his years.) light angst, smoking, swearing, flirting

A/N: hey team.... lol. so sorry for the wait! now i wrote this between the hours of 2-4am (as i am uploading it is 4:10) so i apologize for any mistakes! Thank you for reading!

W/C:4.6k

STEVE HARRINGTON

“Dustin! Slow down!” Steve called out. His son had already made it halfway across the parking lot, practically sprinting to the doors.

“Come on Dad!” Dustin turned around and let his dad catch up. He grabbed the elder's hand, pulling him along.

“Okay, Okay!” Steve kept a tight hold on Dustin's hand. He’d done his research on convention etiquette and came across an article about adults losing their children and he told himself he’d be completely sure of where Dustin was at all times. The backpack he donned was filled with multiple water bottles, and his wallet had both cash and his debit and credit cards in case of any financial emergency.

They’d gotten there much earlier than they needed to, but with Steve’s anxiety and Dustin’s exhilaration, neither of them minded having to wait around until they opened the doors for the panel. Dustin talked Steve’s ear off, rambling about anything and everything related to the convention.

Steve fiddled with the tag on the lanyard he and Dustin were given upon entry, and he finally realised the reality of the scenario. Soon, he’d be in a room with not only a hundred other people, but the man he’d been pining for in secret for the past who knows how long. He was brought out of his thoughts by Dustin tugging on his sleeve.

The two filed into the large room along with a bunch of other people, and Steve’s grip on Dustin’s arm was probably tighter than it should’ve been as they found their way to an open pair of seats. The group that Steve had paid an exorbitant amount of money to see would be taking the stage soon, and Steve could feel his son practically vibrating next to him.

“You sure you’re gonna make it through this without exploding?” Steve asked and Dustin nodded.

“I have to!” Dustin exclaimed and Steve laughed, putting a hand on his son's head, twisting his fingers into his curls. Dustin wore a bright yellow sweater Steve recognized as his own, and the smile he wore was brighter than Steve had seen in a while. More people would pour into the room, and the multiple conversations would be overwhelming if Steve wasn’t focused on the way the lights dimmed and a woman walked on stage.

“Good afternoon, everyone!” She called into the microphone. The voices around quieted, and Steve tensed in his seat. “My name is Tory, and I will be hosting the event we’ve all come out here for. So, what do you say we get our guests up here and get this thing started?” The audience cheered and the streamers came on stage one by one before walking to their respective seats. A guy with dirty blond curls led the way up the stage, introduced as ‘Gareth,’ and the rest followed in. There was Austin, Chrissy (who Steve recognized from the singular stream he’d watched), Robin and Jeff. They all seemed to notice at the same time as the audience that Eddie wasn’t trailing behind them. After a moment, the applause faded and Gareth sighed into the microphone in front of him.

“This asshole.” The audience laughed, and only a moment later did Eddie shuffle on stage. Clapping and cheering surrounded Steve, but he could hardly hear it as his eyes focussed on Eddie’s form. 

It was different to seeing him through a TV screen, and he wasn’t sure how Eddie could get any more attractive. His hair was loose, reaching down past his collarbones. It was curly, and wild, and free. He wore a pair of black skinny jeans, torn at the knees and thighs, chains hanging from two of his belt loops. His shirt was looser, the white fabric clashing with the black of the tattoo’s that spread down both of  his arms, and had graphic text of a band name Steve could vaguely recall. He could feel Dustin’s grip on his arm as he too watched in awe, although for a completely different reason. Eddie finally reached his chair, taking a theatrical bow before sitting down. 

“I love you, Eddie!” Someone called from farther back in the room. Eddie’s eyebrows raised and he smiled.

“Woah,” He spoke into his microphone, pulling a piece of his hair over his mouth. “Love you too.” Part of the audience cheered and Eddie leaned away from his microphone.

“Stop flirting with the audience, man.” Gareth scolded half-heartedly and Eddie returned his words with a raised middle finger, sparking genuine laughter from Gareth.

“So!” Tory spoke, cutting off the pair's bickering. Let's start off with a few games, yeah?”

About half an hour and a couple of games later, they’d finally reached the question portion of the panel. Tory explained that they would start off with submitted questions and then move to having a few audience members ask their own. Pulling out a clipboard, presumably the clipboard that held the predetermined questions, Tory smiled.

“Alright! First question is from ‘Hellfire’, with an ‘i’ on Twitter. It reads, ‘Robin when did you first realise you were a lesbian?’” Robin smiled and thought for a quick moment before answering. 

“Well, I think I've always known, you know? Like, I never had actual crushes on boys in school and I remember asking myself why I couldn't like girls like the boys liked girls. But then after I got older and learned the queer people existed, and what each label meant, is when I really was able to realise who I am.” Robin rambled, and Steve couldn’t help but smile. The audience gave her claps and snaps and cheers of encouragement.

“Beautifully said, Robin! Our next question is for Austin-” The voice of the host faded away as Steve zeroed in on Eddie once again. He was resting his chin on his pale hand, chunky rings and bands covered his fingers and chipped black nail polish was painted messily on his nails. Even from where they sat, Steve could see the way the corner of Eddie’s eyes crinkled when he smiled, smile lines and dimples on his cheeks accompanying the grin that blessed Eddie's face. The purple and yellow lighting gave his hair and skin a glow that Steve found terribly alluring. He wasn't sure how much time had passed, getting lost in the bright baritone of Eddie’s voice as it mixed in with the others, studying the man before him as if he’d be tested afterwards. He only came back to reality when Eddie’s chuckle crackled through the microphone, but he couldn’t bring himself to actually tune into the words being said.

Soon, the pre-submitted questions had dwindled and after the last few had been asked they moved to having audience members voice their own queries. The audience questions were less organised, many asking about mundane attributes such as favourite meals or shows while others were completely obscure and had the panel struggling to answer.

“Well, we have time for just one more question from the audience.” And before Steve knew it, his son’s hand was shooting up. “Alright, you in the yellow, back there!” A smile spread across Dustin’s face as he stood and made his way to the microphone placed in the aisle between seats.

“So,” Dustin began nervously. Steve watched as he fiddled with his fingers, a nervous tick he’d developed. “Uh, my question is for Eddie?”

“Shoot, little man.” Eddie smiled, warm and welcoming, and Steve tried to swallow the lump in his throat.

"Ah, um. So, you talk about how school was for you quite often and I wanted to know how exactly you overcame all the uh, the name calling and everything?" Dustin was stuttering through a few words and Steve wanted nothing more than to go over and rub his boy's back. He could do that when Dustin returned. Eddie's face softened and he started to fiddle with the rings that Steve wondered always riddled his fingers.

"Yeah. So for anyone who doesn't watch me that often, I do streams where I talk about my unfortunate middle school and high school years to kind of-- shed light on what it's like for kids who were and are like me," Eddie started. "Uh I was called names," He moved a hand in Dustin's direction. "Messed with physically, all that. As for your question, I think I just started to realise that I'm not what any of those assholes say I am. That they can't push me around anymore.

Obviously, things might work differently for other people but that's what worked for me personally. Plus I was held back a couple of years so my bullies were out of my school life and I was able to be who I am." A few people from the crowd clapped, egging on the rest. Dustin beamed at Eddie's response.

"Thank you," Was the last thing Dustin said before he stepped away from the microphone and back to his seat beside his father.

"How was that?" Steve asked his son who was practically vibrating in his chair.

“That was so cool!” Dustin whispered and Steve smiled. Little did he know how cool it was going to get.

“Who knew you were such a poet, Eddie?” Tory asked and Eddie laughed and shook his head.

“Well, I am a songwriter so I'm technically halfway there.” He shrugged as if it were no big deal.

“That sounds about right.” Tory spoke over the few cheers that broke out. “Well, folks. That’s the end of our time here. Give it up for our wonderful guests!” Applause roared throughout the room as the panel stood and waved to the audience as they left. Steve felt like he could breathe again. He held Dustin close as they made their way outside, just as he had on the way in, and once the warm sun fell on their skin Steve took the backpack off his shoulders and pulled out a few granola bars and bottles of water. Steve spoke again after a few minutes.

“I have a surprise for you.” He stated as he zipped the backpack up, slinging it over his shoulder.

“Really?” Dustin asked from his seat on the concrete curb. “What is it?”

“Can’t tell you. But, we have to be there in the next fifteen minutes so we should make our way over there.” Steve pointed to his watch as Dustin stood up. The boy was obviously starting to grow tired, though the afternoon sun shining in the sky should mean he should still be energised. He tired easily, Steve found, and between the fact Steve knew Dustin didn't get much sleep the night prior and the amount of excitement that filled the boy, Steve was surprised he hadn't crashed yet.

“Lead the way, father dearest.” Dustin said, mustering up as much enthusiasm as he could. That was okay, he’d be truly enthusiastic soon.

EDDIE MUNSON

Eddie thanked any god that was out there for the short break he and his friends were given after the panel. It was so much fun being able to talk to his fans, though he found it unfortunate that it was by way of him being on a stage. A specific boy who asked a question stuck out to him. Surprisingly over the others who shouted compliments or "I love you's" at him. Yep. Just a young boy in a large yellow sweatshirt, probably in his middle school or early high school years asking how he overcame the bullying. Eddie swore it almost done broke his heart.

He took a swig of his bottled water and ate a few pieces of the slightly stale pizza that sat in the small room he and his friends were provided. Eddie popped the tape out of his walkman to flip it around. He closed the lid, and pressed down the play button, letting the sound of his mixtape fill his ear through the single earbud he had in.

Wayne had poked fun at him when he bought it. ‘You tryna be old-school or somethin’?’ He’d said as he rubbed his knuckles into his nephew's scalp. Eddie missed his uncle, and couldn't wait to go see the man someday soon.

"I'm so excited to go meet everyone!" Chrissy gushed. She sat on the loveseat, Robin next to her. 

Haha, get it?

"I'm just happy I get to be with you, Chris. I don't know how I would handle everyone by myself." Robin smiled sheepishly. God, Eddie was gonna barf if Robin kept this up. How could two people be so clueless?

Literally, just ask her out already you idiot.

"I'm gonna make my way over to where I gotta be. Good luck, girls." Eddie clipped his walkman onto his jeans waistline and shot finger guns at the two.

"Good luck, Eddie!" Chrissy jumped up to hug him and over her shoulder, Eddie winked at Robin. Robin returned a shy look as Chrissy pulled away.

"Bye, Eddie," Robin mumbled and Eddie huffed humorously before leaving and shutting the door behind him. He took a deep breath, and finally started to make his way to the next phase of completing this con.

-

It had been about half an hour of meeting fans, taking photos, and receiving small trinkets from crafty fans that he graciously took and thanked their makers. He wasn’t sure of the last time he’d felt so appreciated.

"I love you!" A fan said as they waved each other off.

"I love you too," Eddie would return those words multiple times, and each time he meant it. The photographer called for the next people in line. The next thing he knew, a familiar flash of yellow entered his vision and he recognized the owner of a mop of brown, curly locks. Eddie grinned. Then he noticed the figure following the young man. He was tall, and broad, and also had a mop of brown hair on the top of his head. His hair was not curly like the boy he was with.

Wow, okay.

"Hey, little man!" Eddie brought back the nickname from earlier as the boy tucked himself into Eddie's side, the other man standing just behind his son and in turn behind Eddie.

"Hi!" Yellow shirt was ecstatic and Eddie hugged the boy back. Eddie took a quick look over his shoulder at the slightly taller man, blinking him a greeting and receiving a nod in return. Eddie was sure he’d never seen someone so handsome.

Handsome. He couldn't believe he was using that word, but matched completely with what he was seeing. Broad shoulders, swoopy hair, and shiny eyes. Freckles, straight white teeth and a warmth that radiated off of his body. Eddie wanted to lean into it, always feeling so cold. This guy totally would’ve bullied him in school. But, here he was, not a malicious gilt in his eye.

Maybe Eddie wasn’t as over high school as he thought.

"Three, two, one." The photographer counted down before the flash struck, capturing the image. The youngest started to move and Eddie grabbed onto his shoulders.

"Hey," He started and the boy's confused eyes met Eddies. "Just wanted to remind you of how awesome you are." Eddie's smile was as soft as his eyes were and the latter's eyes widened. The photographer shouted out, trying to keep the momentum, and Eddie wished the boy farewell, giving one last look to the other man. The latter looked back at him, his expression was unreadable, but devastatingly attractive. The two left and Eddie continued on with the now shorter line of people left.

CHRISSY CUNNINGHAM

Chrissy sighed as she lay down on the loveseat in the group's room. Taking photos and meeting fans personally was super fun, but also very tiring. Robin was going to return soon. She had just left to grab a couple more bottles of water since she and Rob had finished theirs and the only one in the room was Eddie’s and frankly, she did not want to ingest whatever that man's mouth touches. (It was mostly cigarettes, that's all she knew.)

Her mind wandered back to Robin. Chrissy rested her head on the small pillow that sat in the corner of the cushions, almost wishing it was Robin's chest she were resting on instead.

Wait, what? She couldn't think of her best friend like this, could she? 

She couldn’t help but realise she thought this way a lot. What would Robin think? Yeah, she was a lesbian, but that doesn't mean she's interested in just any girl who comes along. Plus, she's Robin's best friend. Keyword, friend. There's no way Robin likes her in any other way than platonically. What would Robin think? Would she hate Chrissy? Her thoughts were cut short when the taller girl burst through the door, Eddie and the rest of the guys following.

"Guys you will never believe this. That one kid that asked that really deep question to me, came to my booth and I think he was there with his dad or something. Anyway the dad, or whatever, was like, super fucking hot--" Eddie's voice trailed off. Chrissy wanted to pay attention to Eddie's rambling, she did, but she had too much to think about right now.

"Hey," Robin's voice cut into Chrissy's thoughts from her spot on the floor next to the loveseat. As much as she loved to hear Robin speak, it was currently the last thing she wanted to hear "You okay?" 

"Yeah, 'm just tired 's all," Chrissy mumbled. Robin looked skeptical before nodding and sending Chrissy a sympathetic look.

-

Chrissy ended up going back to the hotel early while everyone else stayed back a bit longer before they left for a restaurant for a celebratory dinner. Robin offered to stay with her, but Chrissy waved her off and told her to have fun with the guys. Robin promised to bring her back some leftovers and let her know she hopes Chrissy feels better. Chrissy smiled weakly before Robin would leave and Chrissy would change into a tank top and shorts and slip into the sheets of the bed she would have to share with the girl she was currently struggling over tonight.

She felt herself tear up.

Why did this have to be so hard? Why did this have to happen now and not in like, high school? She couldn't be having a sexuality crisis right now, not while they were supposed to be having fun at the convention for the next couple of days. Chrissy was scared of rejection, she admitted to herself. Not having feelings bigger than their current friendship, but the idea that she tells Robin these feelings and Robin rejects her and never speaks to her again and--

The tears slid down her cheeks and Chrissy wiped them away.

It was no use though when the last tears would be replaced quickly.

STEVE HARRINGTON

Music quietly played through the speakers of Steve's car. He had placed an order for pickup at his and Dustin's favourite restaurant and they were on their way to go get it. Steve was starving and Dustin was on his way to falling asleep in the passenger seat. After another couple more minutes, they finally arrived at the place and Steve softly nudged Dustin's shoulder.

"I'll be right back, 'kay? Just grabbing the food." He said quietly. Dustin nodded and Steve took that as acknowledgment. He got out of the car and went inside, waiting for a staff member. Someone quickly arrived. Steve told them his business and his name and in return, he earned a big  warm paper bag that would be filled with the dinner. Steve thanked the person who helped him and he walked out of the door and made his way back to his car.

Until he saw a cloud of smoke from where the end of the small parking lot and the wall of the building met. There stood a man who he recognized all too well.

This was stupid. Steve was stupid.

Still, Steve walked over to the other who still wasn't made known of his presence.

"Hey," Steve greeted as he got closer. The long-haired man turned his head, blowing out another cloud of smoke. He tilted his head curiously before he spoke.

"Hi," Eddie said before he dropped his cigarette and stepped on it. "You're the guy that came in with the kid in the yellow, right?" Steve nodded, ignoring how his heart stuttered at the fact he was recognized.

"Yeah, he's my son. I wanted to thank you for what you said to him," Steve began, fiddling with the handle of the paper bag. "He's been having some issues at school. Says watching your videos and stuff makes him feel better." Eddie smiled and rocked back and forth on his feet.

"Nah," He put his cheek to his shoulder and his hands in the pocket of his hoodie. "Sucks that shits happening to him. Looks like times haven't changed, huh?" Steve sighed and pursed his lips in a silent apology. "What's your name, pretty boy?" Eddie asked. Steve laughed and shook his head lightly as blood rushed to his face. God, he hadn’t felt like this in ages.

"Steve," He answered. Eddie stepped forward, leaving limited space between the two. Steve blinked, his legs feeling as though they were full of lead.

"Well, Steve." Eddie pulled something out of his pocket before reaching his arm through the space of Steve's arm and torso, slipping whatever was in his hand into the back pocket of Steve's jeans. He let his hand stay there a second, eyes not reaching Steve's, but rather trailing over each feature on his face. After what felt like forever, Eddie removed his hand. He patted Steve's hip. "An… Offer. If you want it." Eddie stared up at Steve through his eyelashes. Their height difference wasn't much, but it was enough for Eddie to have to turn his eyes upwards.

Eddie took a step back. Steve sighed.

"I have to return to my friends. They're probably wondering where I am." He took one last look, up and down, at Steve. "Hope that serves you well," Eddie smirked before he turned around and walked back towards the entrance of the restaurant.

Steve froze for a second before he reached into the pocket, still warm from Eddie's hand. He pulled out what the other had put in. It was a wad of paper. Confused, Steve unrolled it. There he found digits scribbled. Eddie had given him his number.

ROBIN BUCKLEY

"Night, Ed! Night Austin!" Robin called from down the hallway, receiving a couple of grumbled replies. She giggled to herself before she continued her way to her room. She got to the door, pulled out her key and let herself inside. There she found minimal lighting and a mound under the covers of the bed, some strawberry blonde hair peeking out from the top. 

Robin shut the door as she sympathetically sighed. She put the pasta she'd saved for Chrissy, her favourite, on the vanity and quietly made her way over to Chrissy's side of the bed. Robin put a gentle hand on Chrissy's exposed shoulder.

"Chris? You awake?" She mumbled quietly. No response. Chrissy's cheeks were stained with tears and Robin bit her cheek. Why had Chrissy been crying? She wasn't feeling too good, Robin knew, but what had made her cry? She pushed Chrissy's hair behind her ear and stayed there for a moment before returning to the door where she took off her shoes and coat, accidentally knocking Chrissy's coat off of the hanger. It was a quiet sound, but still, Chrissy awoke.

"Robin?" She yawned as she sat up and turned to where the other was standing.

"Y-yeah. Sorry for waking you," Robin's apology was soft as she picked up the smaller coat. She paused for a moment after hanging it back up. "Chris? Were you... Crying?" Robin moved back towards the bed. She was never the best at this type of stuff. She never knew how to help people feel better, oftentimes she felt useless in these situations. But, her best friend was hurting, and she needed to try.

"No! Uh..." Chrissy pulled her knees to her chest before huffing defeatedly. "Yeah,"

"How come?" Robin sat down and shuffled closer to Chrissy, putting an arm around her waist and pulling her into a side hug. "You okay?" Chrissy sniffled and shook her head. "What's wrong?"

"Can't tell you." Chrissy put her forehead to her knees. "You'll hate me." Robin ran her hand along the shorter girl's back.

"I won't hate you, Chris. I could never hate you. I'm your best friend, you can tell me anything." Robin was even more concerned. Throughout the years Robin had known her, she’d never seen Chrissy this way, so full of self depreciation. The only time that had come close was just after her ex-boyfriend, Jason, broke up with her. But even then, she seemed more relieved than upset. Whatever was bugging her had to be serious. Chrissy was silent for a moment, the only sound in the room being the friction of Robin's hand on Chrissy's tank top.

"I think I like girls," Chrissy said. Robin's jaw almost dropped before she went to console her friend.

"Well, Chris, you know I'm a lesbian. Why would you think I’d-"

"I think I like you." Chrissy whimpered.

Oh.

"Chrissy... You're serious? You're not playing with me, right? Because this has happened before where a girl tells me they like me as a joke, or they think they like girls and want to use me as, like, the test to find out if they really do, and then turn around and--"

"I'm serious Rob, I just..." Chrissy let tears roll down her face once again and Robin unconsciously let herself wipe them away. "This is all so new to me and you're my best friend and I don't know how to feel." Robin frowned. She remembered her sexuality crisis in grade eight and how hard it was for her. She felt for Chrissy at this moment. Carefully she turned Chrissy around and pulled her onto her lap, grabbing the hands that covered the latter's face and moving them away. Robin smiled gently as she spoke.

"Hey," She started with. "It'll be okay, Chrissy. Trust me. It's hard for a while, I know." Robin brought Chrissy's head to her shoulder. They were silent for a moment until. "I like you too," Robin whispered. Chrissy gasped and pulled back, staring at Robin with surprise.

"You-- You do?" She gasped, staring up at Robin with big eyes. Robin took Chrissy's face into her hands pulling her in to leave a kiss on her forehead. Chrissy was a light shade of pink and less upset than before.

"I do. I have for a long time." Robin laughs. Chrissy smiles and lays her head back on Robin's shoulder. They stay there for a few minutes before it seems like Chrissy's about to fall asleep. Robin carefully took Chrissy out of her lap and laid her on the bed. "We'll talk about this in the morning, 'kay?" She said softly. Chrissy nodded and Robin smiled fondly. "I'll be right back." She pulled the blankets back over Chrissy's half-conscious body and she left to the bathroom before pulling out her phone.

Me

guess who might have a chance at getting a girlfriend

eddie help me

After a few minutes, Eddie didn't reply. He must be sleeping, Robin thought.

When actually, Eddie was up making a few text messages of his own.

tags:

@marklee-blackmore

[anonymousauthorsblog]

Turning Passions

chapter 3 • smile for the camera!!

lowercase intended

*there is writing sections in this chapter!”

symphonia IX - current joys

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y/n pov..

y/n glances over her phone one more time to see the tweet toge reposted while maki is spamming her phone asking when’s she’s coming home and if she can relieve her from the torture that toge is forcing her to do. as maki would be entering the stream with him that night. she shuts off her phone before shoving it in her dance bag. y/n gets up and enters the dance room where her class is supposed to be. it’s always been routine for y/n to show up 20 minutes earlier before class to get extra practice in to make sure her ballet is on peak, before presenting herself to any dance teacher. this has been a routine for her since she was a young teen in determination to stay on top of her class and to push herself to become more flexible, more precise and overall perfect. But as she walks in she sees students already doing the same thing, many students at the barre, others practicing turns and overall dancers becoming better than her. she quickly finds her a spot at the barre a little more further from everyone with her head facing down so others don’t see the panic rising up. y/n realizes that this dance class isn’t normal from the ones she used to call home, she trembles as she lifts up into a relevè her feet getting shot with the same pain as usual- she sits in that position until it wears off. y/n suddenly understands the situation- in this class everyone is fighting to be the best, she continues the stretches until the teacher walks in, everyone then runs into a line waiting for instruction. y/n quickly follows behind standing in first position waiting to hear from the dance instructor. “welcome to NYSSU academy, you made it in first into the school and now into the dance program. i would say congratulations but the hard part starts now” boomed the small older mature lady walking pass the dancers, judging as they stand tall in perfection. the teacher continues welcoming in a younger looking coach around her twenties “this is my co teacher” don’t be mistaken she isn’t here to play around. the lady continues in a large demanding tone. “your practices are always a test, always be on your best performance- nothing will go unnoticed. But if you’re wondering what your actually graded on in this class is performances. we have big 3 events and one mini in the middle of the year, be prepared because each day is a drill to see if you can make it onto the stage”. hearing those words send chills across y/ns skin as she keeps her head forward, but her eyes are drawn to the teachers movement. y/n isn’t usually afraid of any teachers tone, words or actions- living and growing in the world of dance she’s already used to these types of teachers, even harsher. Instead she takes these as a challenge because how can you succeed without a little push? The teacher words continue- “our first performance this fall, we will be doing the swan lake, make today our first rehearsal. more information on parts and lead rolls will be announced later, but for now let’s start our class, as this is the closest thing you’ll get to a professional taste in the real cold world. I expected you guys already to be stretched and ready?” she asked, many replied with a small yes while others nodded their heads. “perfect she replied okay everyone on the barre.” Practice continues on with additional leaps, pointe work then finally turns- something that y/n excelled in. the teacher groups each student in a group of four before calling each group to do a sequence of turns the last step holding into multiple pirouettes as they can. y/n is confident and collected as the first group goes on- then finally her group is called. she enters the stage, then the teacher calls the counts “alright, 1, 2 3…” y/n tunes her out hitting each step until it’s time to hold the turns. she hits and hits for what seems forever trying to calm down as she assumes that the other 3 members are done. Until from the blink of an eye one person is still standing. it’s a competition in her mind, she turns and turns matching the pace of the other dancer, 5 turns done and the other girl isn’t giving up.

y/n is getting tired, she messed up by putting most of her stamina in the beginning portion making it harder to hit these turns clean. she tries to fight for dominance until the teacher slams on the wall “stop!” she yelled out, “what’s your names?” y/n, l/n maam” “kai, everdeen” the two dancers say. the teacher looks them up and down before saying in a loud demanding tone, “if you’re going to do turns like that for a long period of time, make sure you technique is on point” the teacher dismisses them away, then ends the class altogether. she speaks loudly “that was good for today, but you guys need to step up your game because what I saw today was a disaster waiting to happen, goodbye” with that, the words brought y/n back to reality. she feels her throat closes up realizing with this competition with her peer that in this class, makes her realize that she’s just an ordinary dancer in this world, nothing sticks out making her great or special. y/n feels flush and embarrassed getting called out in the class as she makes it through to the dressing room taking off her point shoes, tossing them in her bag. she quickly puts on her boots and makes her way out towards the door to leave. she runs out feeling her breath quicken, she doesn’t understand, she was supposed to be the best- she grows frustrated. to anyone else this simple call out and for how long the turns were going for it would be a simple okay, but to y/n this proved that she was getting farther towards sheer overall goal. scaring her that all this work and years she put in this sport was for nothing. she leaves and makes her way to her dorm, still fully dressed in ballet clothing, the difference is the strain of dance coming for her mentally and physically.

3rd person pov

Toge and Maki settle down in his room as he launches the discord call. “Yooooo Yujiii” he exclaims. “HEYYY TOG- who’s that” yuji replies. “oh that’s maki, she’s my friend/roomate and she’s going to join the stream if that’s okay” toge explains. “alright that’s cool, we’re just waiting on nobara and megumi and the we can start.” Not even a minute later both megumi and nobara join on and everyone introduces themselves again. After all the introductions and testing each camera and mic are finished, it’s showtime. toge and maki play on split screen, interacting with the fans and instantly clicking with the trio on the other line of the call. they play for thirty minutes and on the line of maki and toge they hear a knock. “Y/N finally”, maki sighs as she gets up waving bye to the stream, she walks up to y/n. when y/n finally looks up to maki she puts on a soft smile. “everything okay?” maki ask, “yeah!” y/n replies a little too fast for comfort, “okay, how was danc-.” maki is cut off by y/n yelling “oh toge your on stream??” he turns around from his desk and happy greets her “y/nnnnnnn welcome home come say hi. “hey everyone!!” she waves towards the computer screen, “smile for the camera!!” toge tells her. She smiles and starts looking at toge screen. maki grows suspicious but lets it be not wanting to cause a scene in the middle of a livestream. Behind the camera on Megumis side he widens his eyes, he scoffs recognizing the same person who ran in late to his statistics class. He then slightly curses at himself for making an expression over someone thats just in the same class as him. then panic overfills his head as someone who’s known for being expressionless and not very expressive just made a face for a random girl who popped on his screen. he tries to continue on, trying to cover up his mistake and focus on the game he’s playing on his computer. yuji suddenly pops up and yells “HI Y/NNN IM YUJII” nobara pops up as well introducing herself making it known that she will become friends with her. toge then pats the chair that once accompanied maki and asked her to join the stream, even though y/n is exhausted she agrees hoping it would take her mind on things. the stream continues on with nobara and y/n tag teaming toge, yuji and megumi each team destroying each others plots and taking each others treasured things. with almost an hour and half passing the stream ends with each player saying its farewells. Yuji bounces off his desk running into megumis room jumping off the walls. “that was fun megumi, megumi was that fun??” megumi looks up with an annoyed tone remembering about the homework he put off for this task. “yeah” he whispered. “i guess”.

megumis pov 3rd person

megumi found himself staring straight into his homework, he was assigned to direct an advertisement for his own made up brand due at the end of the week, assigned in class that day. he slams his fist down not being able to think of anything besides the problem he’s in with the world. after the stream he gained a lot of popularity finally making it to the 10 thousand club of followers. he groans as he starts to get stressed, streaming and posting on the internet was something he did for fun with the peer pressure of his childhood friend- he never thought it would grow to this level of popularity. every time he opens his phone now it’s a reminder of that new fame he has with new demand. with doing the math and thinking, he applies that in order to continue this support for his channel for not only himself but his friends, that means he has to upload a lot more. meaning more unwanted fame and more workload. megumi never really minded playing and uploaded as he thought it was fun and something to do in his free time, but now he’s rethinking his future and his channel completely. he grazes down to see the new “fan edits and ship names” created by his delusional fan base. this ship annoyed him a bit based on the sole fact that she’s in arm reach to him and she definitely knows about this new ship. he gets embarrassed because he has no idea who she is and where she came from. but after this scandal on the internet, she’s been in his mind the whole night. megumi groans frustrated as he turns away from his chair to settle down for bed, he doesn’t understand the complexity of the internet but he knows he’s becoming the middle of it. with many thoughts rushing in and out of his head he finally flips over to finally release the now throbbing headache he has, he falls asleep waiting for the troubles to attend to tomorrow.

Authors note: chapter 3…. a little angsty this chapter but MEGUMI AND Y/N FINALLY MET!!! in this chapter y/n took us along on her first day of dance… i don’t think she expected it to go like that tho… ANYYYYWAYYS i hoped you guys enjoyed this chapter and let’s see how the relationship develops. like always see you next chapter <3

fun facts:

• the gc was being a bit dramatic when they said his eyes “lit up” when he saw her, but at the same time it’s RARE for megumi to show any emotion on his face… maybe he saw something he liked….

• growing up y/n did many styles of dance her favorite being ballet because of how strict and demanding it is.

• nobara got pretty close to maki and y/n (new friendship #girlpower???

• megumi gets irritated when people on the internet ship him with other creators based on the fact that he doesn’t know them at all. making him a little uncomfortable

[your-girl-nina]

jegulus romeo and juliet play au: Regulus is in charge of the hogwarts school play this year, he chooses Romeo and Juliet. James auditions for and gets the part of romeo because lily is playing juliet. Last minute though lily drops out and Regulus the only person who knows all the lines because he's obessed with the play has to play juliet last minute. James doesn't know Regulus is playing Juliet till the masquerade ball scene and they meet and kiss on stage for the first time. I feel like this would be such a great au, because Regulus acts a bit like a diva with wanting to get this play perfect(mostly because all the parents are coming to see it and he wants to make his proud). All the Marauders era teens are in the play.

I'm really sorry about not replying earlier!!!its been in my drafts for weeks 😭. so like, I almost cried when I read this. I love the concept and I now worship you. Thank you for living. I really appreciate your existence. I expanded on it if you don't mind. All credits to you though!! 🙌(fic below the cut. Word count: 1181. ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE) @darkcrowprincess

Regulus Black stood at the front of the room, clipboard in hand, as he eyed the stage with sharp precision. The Hogwarts auditorium was buzzing with the excited chatter of students, most of them nervously glancing at their scripts, waiting for their cue. The annual school play was just around the corner, and this year Regulus had pulled out all the stops. Romeo and Juliet. A classic. And one that would undoubtedly bring praise if executed perfectly. It had to be perfect.

He ran a hand through his sleek black hair, exhaling sharply as he watched James Potter—Hogwarts' most infuriating Gryffindor—practicing his lines with Lily Evans, who was supposed to play Juliet.

James had, of course, gotten the role of Romeo. There was never any question. Not only did he have a natural charisma that drew in an audience, but he also wanted to be Romeo because Lily was cast as Juliet. Regulus had rolled his eyes when James had given his half-sincere audition, mostly showing off for her. But as much as it pained him to admit it, James was good. Very good.

Lily, on the other hand, had been struggling with the role. Though she was dedicated, she seemed less and less invested in playing Juliet, and it hadn't gone unnoticed by Regulus.

Regulus had chosen Romeo and Juliet because it was his favorite. He’d been obsessed with the story since he was young, the tragic romance captivating his imagination. And now, with the parents of nearly every student coming to see it, including his parents, it was crucial that the performance be flawless. Walburga Black had expectations. And failing to meet them wasn’t an option.

“Alright, everyone, positions!” Regulus called, snapping everyone to attention.

The cast scrambled into place, and Regulus sighed as he heard Sirius complaining to Remus in the background about his costume. Sirius, naturally, had been cast as Mercutio, and his flair for dramatics seemed to shine brighter than ever. Remus, always patient, was Tybalt. Peter was cast as Benvolio, and Evan Rosier, who Regulus trusted to take the play seriously, had taken on the role of Paris.

Everything was in order. Well, mostly.

That was until Lily approached him right before the next rehearsal with a pained look on her face.

"Regulus, I’m so sorry," she began, wringing her hands. "But I can’t do the play. Something’s come up—family stuff. I have to drop out."

Regulus’s heart dropped into his stomach. "What?!" he hissed, trying to keep his voice low. "Lily, we open in three days. You can't drop out now!"

"I know, I know! But there's no way around it," she said, looking genuinely regretful. "I’m really sorry, Reg. But—look, you know all the lines. You could play Juliet."

Regulus stared at her, incredulous. "Me? Play Juliet? Are you out of your mind?"

Lily gave him a half-smile. "You know you’d do it better than anyone else. You’ve been correcting all of us on our lines since day one. Besides, it’s not like we can pull someone else in this late. You’ve been obsessed with this play for months. You’re the only one who knows the part well enough to step in."

Regulus opened his mouth to argue, but she wasn’t wrong. He did know the lines. He’d practically memorized the entire script. But standing on stage as Juliet? Acting opposite James Potter?

"Fine," he said after a moment, his tone clipped. "But you are going to explain this to everyone, especially Potter."

Lily grinned. "Deal."

---

When rehearsal resumed later that day, there was chaos in the auditorium as Lily made her announcement that she had to drop out. James looked like he was about to combust.

"What do you mean you’re dropping out?!" James exclaimed, his voice echoing off the stone walls. "Who the hell is going to play Juliet?!"

Regulus cleared his throat, stepping forward. "I am."

James stared at him as though he’d grown a second head. "You?"

"Yes, me," Regulus said with an eye roll. "I know the lines better than anyone, and no one else can step in on such short notice."

James blinked, then a slow grin spread across his face. "Well, well, well. This just got a lot more interesting."

"Don’t get any ideas, Potter," Regulus warned, narrowing his eyes. "We are doing this by the book."

---

The day of the play arrived sooner than anyone expected, and nerves buzzed in the dressing rooms backstage. Regulus had spent the last few days perfecting his performance, pushing the cast harder than ever, making sure every cue, every line was impeccable. The pressure was mounting, and his heart pounded as the audience started to fill in—the sound of parents, professors, and students murmuring filling the air. Somewhere out there, his mother and father were waiting.

He was dressed in an elaborate gown—classic for the role of Juliet, and admittedly quite beautiful. His hair was styled perfectly, the makeup enhancing his already sharp features, giving him the delicate appearance of a tragic heroine. He hated to admit it, but he looked the part. More than that, he felt the part. Juliet had always fascinated him—the depth of her love, her resolve in the face of her family’s demands. Regulus could relate more than he would ever admit aloud.

Standing offstage, waiting for his entrance, Regulus allowed himself a moment of reflection. He hadn’t told James he would be playing Juliet during their scenes together. He wanted it to be a surprise—or perhaps he was simply too nervous to deal with Potter’s reaction.

And then, it was time.

The scene: the Capulet masquerade ball. The lights dimmed as the music swelled, casting an ethereal glow over the stage. James, as Romeo, wandered through the crowd of actors, his gaze searching for his Juliet. He didn’t know it yet, but she was closer than he thought.

Regulus stepped onto the stage, his heart pounding as he moved through the crowd. His eyes locked onto James from across the room. For a moment, time seemed to stop. James, masked and dressed in his elaborate costume, turned, and their gazes met.

Recognition flickered in James’s eyes, but it wasn’t until Regulus stepped closer, the light catching his face, that realization dawned.

“Regulus?” James whispered, his voice barely audible.

But they were on stage now, and Regulus couldn’t falter. He tilted his head, giving a small, knowing smile. “Romeo.”

There was a beat of silence before James responded, falling into character seamlessly despite the shock. They moved closer, the dialogue flowing between them, charged with an unexpected energy. The rest of the cast melted into the background as Romeo and Juliet met under the enchantment of the ball, and the audience watched with bated breath.

And then, the moment came.

The kiss.

Regulus’s heart raced as he stepped closer, and before he could second-guess himself, James leaned in, their lips meeting in a soft but electric kiss. The crowd murmured in awe, the chemistry undeniable. It was supposed to be an act—a kiss between Romeo and Juliet. But for Regulus, the lines between acting and reality blurred for just a moment. He pulled back, his breath shallow, and for a split second, he could swear that James looked at him with something other than performance in his eyes.

They continued the scene, and by the time the curtain fell on the first act, Regulus’s mind was spinning. He hadn’t expected this. He hadn’t expected any of it.

And as the applause roared around them, James leaned close, his breath warm against Regulus's ear as he whispered, "You should have told me you’d be Juliet. I might’ve actually practiced that kiss."

Regulus flushed, but the hint of a smirk played on his lips as he replied, "Next time, Potter. Keep your surprises to yourself."

But something had changed, and as they prepared for the next act, Regulus couldn’t shake the feeling that this play had taken on a whole new meaning.

[marticoresims]

I made a custom lifespan that I use in my own game and find to be most realistic. But take into account that I age babies one day earlier and give that extra day to teenagers to go to college. So I count the ages based on that, and the game doesn't agree. This mod is perfectly editable, though. There are a few flavors, depending on how you'd like your PlantSims to age and if you'd like to have an edited (shortened) elder stage.

So the basic human lifespan is: Baby: 0-1 Toddler: 1-6 Child: 6-13 Teenager: 13-22 (I treat college as frozen time) Adult - 22-60

SHORTER ELDER LIFESPAN Originally, the game gives elders a base of 10 days, then randomizes a 1-10 number and adds that, and then adds more days based on aspiration score (or subtracts, but this is only the case for full red). I edited my original lifespan to have more consequences for bad aspiration score and shorter elders in general, so: The base number is still 10, but the random number Sims get is now 1-5. Platinum aspiration is +10 (like the original, but Sims live shorter due to different random number, so the happiest Sims will live max 85 years, considering that elder starts at 60) Gold aspiration is +5 (elder lasts from 16 to 20 days) Green aspiration is +0 (elder lasts from 11 to 15 days) Slight red (or in between) aspiration is -4 (elder lasts from 7 to 11 days) Red aspiration is -8 (elder lasts from 3 to 7 days) This version has 10-day toddler PlantSims - it's the base mod with edited elders.

DIFFERENT PLANTSIM VERSIONS (don't include shorter elders) Vanilla: no change for PlantSims whatsoever (so toddler 4, adult 29 etc.), only human Sims' lifespan is edited.

Equal: PlantSims' lifespan likened to my human one, so: Toddler - 22 days (baby, toddler, child and teen combined) Adult - 38 days

Download on MTS

Credits: The AgeCorrect mod is useful for any lifespan mod to calculate your existing Sims. ijAgecons - the basis of this mod.

[fanficfish]

some random hetalia thoughts about the countries

mostly headcanons and character studies i guess. probably canon but who knows i'm too sleepy to go check. i'm gonna ramble and maybe it'll maek sense i don't know. Someoen tag me if they get anything idea worthy out of this.

link the inspired post: https://www.reddit.com/r/hetalia/comments/1eqt7ek/after_all_these_years_im_gonna_say_it_i_did_not/

I've seen a little talk about how England leaving America on his own for so long messed him up a little (thank you reddit user who go that talk going). So i wanted to think about some of Englands' other colonies and stuff i guess?

so like we have America. I still stand he's probably like, Jamestown or something and over time he became the main US rep, like how the UK has the four brothers (five? Six with Sealand) but England represents them at meetings. Or Japan reps all of Japan instead of like a couple dozen prefectures showing up. That kind of thing. And like that guy's a little messed up. In earlier parts ofhis story, he's shown to just be really explorative, stil strong tho, but mostly jsut a nice sweet kid who happens to have three teenagers fighting over him. Seriously couldn't they share? Oh wait it's hetalia no they can't XD

anyways, it's only wlater once America is firmly under British rule that he starts growing the yelling and loudness. I think that's like the sign hhat he wants a little attention f rom England- like, he's shown to just be a guy when it's Canada when they're kids but england gets the "SHOVE FOOD IN MY PIEHOLE" treatment. And I think that's just because England keeps leaving and coming back but sometimes he just ignores the kids and does his own thing for a long time. Canada ends up letting America take the lead for them. And then later on once all is said and done America revels in his big parties and whatnot because the attention is on him, and it won't heal the hrut of England just leaving all the time but it sorta helps. (Canada doesn't count they're basically joined at the hip it's not the same).

and if you compare it to like the Italies for example. Austria was still there to watch over Italy North even though he really went for the uh. Less optimal route. But he was till there, in his own way. Prussia definitely wasn't going to leave HRE and later Germany alone unless he absolutely had to. Spain didn't jsut go gallivanting around when Romano was there (no comment onhis other former colonies). Ofc you could make an argument for Iceland, but by the time Norway took over he'd been alone mostly for 300 years, and even if Norway and Denmark didn't exactly visit all the time because i headcanon Iceland stayed happily on his island 90% of the time like Aland and Faroe Islands to avoid the drama called "four nordics pretending they could get along under one roof when they definitely are not good rooommate compatable", I doubt he was entirely without parental guidance. Norway could always sense him (so themoment anything bighappened Norway would be marching right over), and Iceland mentions sending letters out. I'm jsut gonna guess he sent the letters via Mr. Puffin, and I'd guess Mr. Puffin could always deliver some words if needed from overseas. Iceland also apparantly has fairies at his house so there's that too. Not thet he'd admit it.

But if you notice, it's def circumstance that gives some character which is cool when we're talkign about stereotype-based characters. Ameriica becomes loud and "ignores" the room when he's given the stage, because if he outrages everyone then he'll get attention. Italy N.. had everythig taken care of for him and has few worries, and a pretty good work ethic since Austria isn't a slacker. Roomano is a spoiled brat. Iceland....honestly boy just needs to accept the others rubbed off on him and he's just as kooky as the rest of them. I know you're a teen and all but kid c'mon you love them mystical animals and you keep bringing up your weird museums XD (I swear this child got Norway's anti-socialness, Sweden's inability to admit things (in his case, he actually likes hanging out with the others), Finland's oddness, and Denmark's everythign else because we all know Norway probably saw Iceland at last and had a crisis over it, man knows when Iceland appears but can't get around to taking the ruling for how many years????

And then there's New Zeeland, who had to raise Austrailia when NZ was also pretty young. NZ doesn't even have the hope of hep fro manyone- America and Canada i'm pretty sure still had visitors from like France and I think the Netherlands would have popped by a few times, because they did do a bit of um. Trading. with the colonies and stuff. Austrialia used to be on the other hand where they sent English prisoners. New Zealand is not ready for that kind of craziness, and so of course we're gonna get a free range crazy Austrailia and a done with it New Zealand who got no help and probabl ygot even less parental support then America. BTW it's crazy that technically GB still techncialy rules over so many big places like Canada and Austrailia even though they also technicall ydon't like that's just so wild.

so what have we learend from this? England sucks as a dad, and Iceland's teen rebel phase is in full swing. WHat was the poitn of this? I don't know but you read it and i wrote it so.....

ima sleep i forgot the poitn already lol

[oldhalloweentape]

if it isn't too much trouble or rush, perhaps a request about the first kiss with vinny santorini?

💐💣Vinny (atlantis) x reader First Kiss Headcanons💥🌹

(Yeah so um… Sorry guys for making you wait for so long on something fresher— I’m just going through it when it comes to my writing, incredibly unconfident in my skills… But I saw how many of you guys liked ‘em. For that I am extremely thankful, I love being able to provide where not many people would get it. Anyways, sorry for the long rant, here it is 💖)

(Edit : all of my headcanons are gender nonspecific when it comes to the reader, and it usually will be if no one specified)

Alright, your first kiss with each other, this sign of love transpires shortly after he overcomes the whole frigid stage of your relationship at the very beginning.

When things started becoming more... Vulnerable and soft started making themselves known, you weren't the only one to notice, your comrades, your amigos did as well. (These are certain people you may or may not know- Who are very supportive of your relationship from the get-go. Wink wink, nudge nudge.)

Um, this expedition crew sees the more than platonic relationship between you two, and all of them have varying opinions on the matter.

For example, Audrey, being the teen she is thinks it's pandering but adorable, Mole? … Not so much.

That stinky little fuck thinks it's nasty, even though he's the one who bathes himself in dirt and grime.

ANYWAYS, going back to Audrey, as I mentioned in an earlier post, (this one right here) Audrey is impatient, and not into the slow-burn trope as she tries to… Quicken the process.

And as the story progresses… Somehow Audrey lassos KIDA of all people into these evil master plans.

These teen-concocted shenanigans are good-natured of course, but they come off as… Odd to say the very least. You see… A kid who is more into mechanics isn't exactly the doctor of love, and an 8,500-8,800-year-old Atlantean woman isn't either.

Their attempts may include the following (let's start up the clown music, shall we?):

- Trying to learn more about the relationship as much as they possibly can (Audrey TRIES to ask somewhat subtle… Kida straight-up demands to know 💀)

- Posing as one partner via love letters… With those letters being very terribly written ones.

- Well, they were kinda bound to be wonky if they were written by an Atlantean warrior woman as a teenager spectates intently… And let’s be honest they could've been believable with how romantically INEPT YOU BOTH ARE, but they didn't take the time to copy your guys’s writing style/handwriting (And Sweets is the one who usually snatches these letters before you guys read them to spare you both, say thank you to Doctor Joshua Strongbear Sweets 💖).

- Putting you guys into DANGEROUS SITUATIONS. This is mainly Kida’s idea, with her being frightfully confident about it due to it working with Milo and her… Thankfully Audrey had enough common sense to dismantle the idea.

After attempt after attempt fails, Audrey finally tries to get Sweets, a man she believes would have far more experience in this kind of thing… But the doctor tells her to NOT interfere, as painful as it is to look at you two being fucking romance failures.

With Milo backing it up of course… This effectively ruined the amusement (I can see Mole just giggling and snorting at all of this, this is COMEDY GOLD TO HIM) that Mole had as Kida and Audrey ran around like two headless chickens, all the while Vinny and you were for the most part unaware of.

But of course, the doctor knew that they all just had to be patient and let things move naturally between you two, a quality that Audrey and Kida were lacking in their plots.

This moment comes to fruition as you both get time alone and find a rather nice spot in Atlantis, which… May or may not have been suggested by Sweets to one of you.

After some heartfelt words and lingering touches, you both were able to share your first kiss, which as many might expect was both sweet and awkward, as God intended 💖☺️

[lycoperdales]

I think I’ve realised why a lot of the fandom don’t really like or understand Scott.

It took rewatching the show so many times for me to see that the show doesn’t really like to focus on what motivate Scott’s decisions as they do for others.

You are aware of Stiles insecurities in season 5a because you see him waking up from nightmares, you hear him talk about how the nogitsune made him feel inherently evil and guilty. You also know that during the late stages of his mother’s dementia, she blamed him for her condition. This makes him scared to tell the truth about Donovan’s death.

You understand Theo’s fear in season 6 because you saw him go through a hell loop in which he was repeatedly killed brutally and violently for a crime he was manipulated into doing (because yes, it was revealed that he was manipulated). You also feel bad for him because of his homelessness and loneliness.

But Scott’s anger towards Derek for biting teenagers was hardly explained at all.

Scott wanting to constantly save people that he doesn’t even know is only implied for a few seconds.

In season 4, Scott, by Kira’s sword, experienced a scenario in which no matter what he did, he ended up killing Liam. What was that? I didn’t even understand it until a parallel experience (Theo’s) was created that I was like “Ah. Scott created his own personal circle of hell to punish himself for doing something that he didn’t even do.”

This was such a monumental aspect to add depth to his character but it was just never mentioned again.

And my guess as to why this is his biggest fear?

Because a year ago he was transformed into an angry thing with claws, fangs and a taste for blood. He was controlled to want to kill the people he loved and almost did it. Then after he learned control, he was constantly told that it was now in his nature to kill and him NOT WANTING PEOPLE DEAD was regarded as naive.

And not even a season later after this hellscape, his biggest fear is realised. He is forcibly stripped from his control, again.

While I’m here I want to address the statement I made earlier about what motivates him to save people at his own expense.

Do you remember after the pack read the book about dread doctors and they started unlocking memories? At first I’ll admit I thought Scott’s was so stupid, “The rest of the pack remembered such gruesome things and Scott is just remembering his dog die?? What the hell??”

But then I read an explanation online on what the memory was. Apparently his dog died saving his life.

Now I know why Scott works at the clinic, now I know why he is studying so hard to be a vet, now I know why he constantly pushed himself to stop others from getting hurt (crossing the mountain ash barrier, trying to fight the dread doctors even though he could barely breathe).

All of these decisions had such a pure motive that I had to find out by literally searching “Scott memory explanation season 5 teen wolf”

[deeper-into-the-chaos]

I'm not quite sure how to articulate this, but like.. People seem so obsessed with age these days and what's acceptable to do at what stage in your life, and there's this underlying (or often overt) impression that there's something wrong with people of different ages interacting with one another in any way.

I happened to be listening to the song Wonderful by Everclear earlier, and it reminded me, as it always does, of how much that song meant to me for so many years. If you've never heard it, it's written from the perspective of a child / teenager going through their parents' divorce. It still hits me in the feels pretty hard in fact, after all this time. And it was a fairly big hit in the day, iirc.

I started thinking about it while listening and realized, it came out in 2000 when I was around 14/15. (My parents separated when I was 16, so I got a lot of mileage out of that particular song, let me tell you.) Everclear was basically a middle-aged band by then. The singer-songwriter would have been around... Late thirties / nearly forty, actually, same as I am now.

And I feel like.. now, a song like that - young person's perspective, emotional, written and performed by an adult about his own childhood, and deeply, deeply powerfully relatable to kids and teens going through the same thing in their lives - these days I suspect a hit song like that would never really happen because of people's obsession with Separating The Ages, even within young vs middle aged adults, let alone across generations.

Anyway. Maybe I'm full of shit and there's plenty of new popular songs around these days that fit the bill, but.. I guess I haven't heard them if there are.

[bengiyo]

My Love Mix Up Ep 6 Stray Thoughts

Last week, the kids went to a training camp apparently meant to teach them to be braver. Atom and Mudmee tried to do well as to not hold back Kongthap and Half with the hopes of making romantic progress with them. Atom managed to confess his feelings to Kongthap, and they have entered the talking stage.

Atom is so cheesed up about meeting Kongthap, but Kongthap is not fretting one bit.

Half and Atom may be good, but Mudmee is ignoring him.

I do enjoy that inexperience remains a big part of this story.

It really is embarrassing to confess you feelings and have someone not remember the moment you’ve been holding onto for possibly years.

I still got beef with this teacher for calling Atom a cheater.

Papang is the tutor!

Man, the ads really take me out of this show.

Presenting a different romantic moment he remembers in lieu of the one for Mudmee is actually a kind way to acknowledge her feelings. Too bad, he couldn’t remember the taste of the cupcake.

Aggressive kabedon.

Dudes posting their Ls saving Half here.

Why is this little gremlin teen eating popcorn like this?

Welcome back, baby is a messy eater.

I am either a watch the movie or don’t watch the movie type. I can’t do both.

Okay, I do like the static shock as an explanation for not touching.

🎶 It’s getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes 🎶

Gemini is charming even when it’s coming through inconsistently.

Mr. Tutor, I know you better not be planning to be homophobic in that sweater.

Oh lord another juice ad.

Man, this show is so sleepy. It took me a while to watch this week.

Kieta Hatsukoi Comparison: This is probably the first time we’ve been able to talk at length about a big diversion between the shows. The Thai show put the practice match earlier, and the Japanese show put it here. This isn’t exactly bad, because this volleyball match doesn’t happen after the ski trip in the manga. I can’t find where it happens in the manga right now, so someone else chime in if this entire bit is a TV show creation. Either way, this leads to different beats between the shows. Weirdly enough, the Thai show is on a closer track than the Japanese one by doing the movie date in the follow up.

One of the big things that stands out is how explicit Aoki’s bisexual awakening is, and it’s his opening concern for this episode following the camping trip. He never expected to develop feelings for a guy, and doesn’t have any framework for how dating and relationships between guys is supposed to work. This offers ample opportunity for comedy with Aida, which Michieda and Suzuki are both capable of delivering. Aoki being unsure about what they are to each other as guys works well for his brewing jealousy about a girl who might have a crush on Ida.

Conversely, Aida helping Aoki with Ida feeds well into Aida feeling bummed about Aoki ignoring him when he tries to talk about Hashimoto.

A small note, but I do miss the comedy Aoki’s mom gave us with her yelling from offscreen.

The comparison commentary will get more complex now. The Thai show will go beyond the Japanese show, and we’re at the stage where the Japanese show made some of its own alterations.

[triscribeaucollection]

@icarussmicarus I blame you for this

My so far one and only hashed-out Treasure Planet fan fic idea: nearly the same plot and events as the movie, *except*, it takes place a few years earlier, with a smaller, scrawnier, Still Figuring Out His Rebellious Teenager Mode Jim, who is NOT allowed to go into space on a mad treasure hunting voyage with just Delbert Doppler for supervision.

So his mom Sarah goes too.

Maybe Jim's dad left earlier than in canon, maybe the Benbow Inn has only been up and running a short time rather than being an established business, but either way, the kid is still in his earlier days of solar surfing and skirting the edges of the law (rather that blasting clear over those edges by his mid-teens).

Old Billy Bones shows up badly injured. The map is handed over. He dies, the pirates show up, the inn burns down.

But when Jim manages to unlock the sphere and reveal Treasure Planet's location, eagerly declaring that they can go and get Flint's Trove and rebuild, Sarah absolutely, positively, categorically refuses to let him take off into the unknown like a certain long gone husband without any guarantee of coming back.

...and she holds out for a good ten minutes, too, until both young Jim and Doctor Doppler manage to convince her to turn it into a family adventure.

I can see her awkwardly attempting to hold a conversation with Captain Amelia, hitting it off slightly better with the straightforward Mister Arrow, and settling into the kitchen with Long John Silver with minimal fuss despite Jim's wariness towards the man. There's the rough period of adjustment, of course, as the outsiders struggle to find there footing, but soon enough... There's a night where Silver's telling stories for the crew, putting his prosthetic arm to great effect, and at one point he starts in on a legend that Sarah actually knows. So, at a key moment, she steps up to his table and in her best bedtime story acting voice, participates. It turns into a great act, Silver easily going with the change, and between the two of them the gathered crew members are roaring with laughter soon enough. Even Jim's delighted by the show, and finally starts to come out of his sullen shell a bit more. The day he and Silver set out on a brief jaunt in one of the lifeboats and come back with matching grins is the day Sarah finally, finally, starts to feel she made the right choice.

And then they're caught in the grip of a collapsing star.

Everything gets battened down, all hands secured with lifelines, Sarah gets a momentary glimpse of Silver bracing himself over Jim just before they're pulled into darkness- and that final burst of energy carries them clear of the black hole. There's cheering, relief, high spirits... up until it's revealed they lose Mister Arrow.

Sarah abruptly feels the grief tenfold again. Of losing her inn, losing her husband, feeling so close to losing Jim... that night she has her first heartfelt conversation with Silver, actually telling him about the series of unfortunate events that led to her and Jim being on this voyage, and talking to him proves to be just as cathartic as venting to Delbert, maybe even a little more-so. He's honest with her in return (or as honest as the secret captain of a pirate crew can be at that moment), and the bridge of trust grows a little wider.

So of course I intend to be extra mean and make the punches hit even harder once the deception is revealed. The pirates stage their mutiny, Amelia, Doppler, Sarah and Jim (with stowaway Morph) barely escape in a lifeboat, and only after crash-landing on the planet below do they find out the map got left behind.

B.E.N is a blessing, providing them with a safe place to rest. When Silver shows up with his flag of parley, Sarah is the one to go out and speak to him, to snarl her anger and throw some of his own words back in his face. They don't part on good terms.

As night falls, Jim quietly asks what they're going to do. Sarah strokes his hair and promises they'll figure it out.

When B.E.N reveals the hidden passageway, Sarah orders Jim to stay put and stand guard for the others. She sneaks back up to the Legacy, engages in a frantic fight with bug-face, just barely, barely managing to trick him into cutting his own lifeline while the anti-gravity is deactivated, to go float away into the vast darkness of space just as he doomed Mister Arrow.

The map is secured. It seems all might turn out well after all. But then she gets back, to find the pirates have snuck into B.E.N's home. Delbert and Amelia are bound and gagged; Jim too, but he's still fighting, still trying to kick at the pirates holding him up.

Silver takes the map.

Silver can't open the map.

Silver tries to order Sarah to open it instead, and when she says she can't, he pulls out his pistol and aims it at Jim.

For a heart-stopping moment she can't speak, but then Sarah's fury comes flooding back and she yells that her son is the one who knows how to open the damn thing so put the weapon down. It gets turned on her instead, when Jim's cut loose, in order to force the boy to cooperate.

All four prisoners get brought along, mother and son kept out of arm's reach of one another until they reach the map's destination, and Jim figures out how to open the portal into the planet's core, into Flint's Trove itself. At that point, faced with mountains of treasure, the pirates pretty much stop caring, and both of them along with B.E.N are able to sneak off towards a decrepit old boat.

But of course, the booby trap goes off. All that treasure starts sliding away, the planet beginning to shake apart. Rather than race for the exit like his panicking crew, Silver sees what Sarah and Jim are doing, trying to get the small craft operational, and sees that as a good moment to step in himself.

Until Sarah comes at him with a sword, anyway.

There's a moment where she is very much about to stab him, only for the boat to get hit and send everybody tumbling. Jim, smaller and lighter, stops falling sooner. So it's Sarah, who goes falling off a newly made cliff, fragments of the core continuing to retract and separate and leaving her with no clear way to climb back up. Jim tries to reach for her, yelling desperately, and Sarah screams back that he is not allowed to come down over the edge after, he needs to run, to get out of there, NOW!

The last bit of metal she's clinging to slides into a sheer surface. Sarah drops.

And Silver catches her.

---

I'm still fiddling with their grand escape from the exploding planet and what happens after, what sort of ending would feel the most satisfying after the moments of apology and reconciliation and if you ever point a weapon at my son again, Silver, then so help me moment that I *have* to include. Maybe Sarah rebuilds the inn, with a certain cook hired on. Maybe she decides the space-faring life wasn't so bad, and decides to go see more distant stars with Jim by her side. However it turns out, the Hawkins pair are sure to have some more adventures together.

[tloujm]

Part XXXVII: Your New Groove

Author' Note: Sooo....I saw the votes and firstly thank you to everyone who did! More people participated than I thought would and it made my heart full! I can only hope this new installment in the fic was worth the wait of almost two years later. If you haven't peeped the final results, posting the chapters one by one now beat out posting all at once later, so I WILL get them all edited and set up to post on a more frequent basis. Thank you for your ongoing patience, for sticking with me and I thank you in advance because where this story is about to head, now that I am locked into the final act of Joel and the reader's storyline, I'm interested to see what y'all think.

PS: I never wrote smut like this before and I haven't written smut in a WHILE in general. I was so nervous to post this.

PPS: Sorry for the delay. Just when I was ready to upload this yesterday, Tumblr wanted to give me technical difficulties. I don't know if that was the universe telling me not to post yet but I just waited until the website wasn't being temperamental with me again.

Genre: A little fluff to start, a buildup with angst and a roaring slide into smut town

Summary: There's a glimpse into your budding friendship with Theresa. You, Joel and Ellie prepare for new changes in your joint lives. You and Joel...ahem... bond as he attempts to give you relief during the last stages of pregnancy.

Ship: Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Small mentions of "daddy", ABF/lactating kink, pregnancy sex

Word Count: 4.9k

“I’m sorry again about dinner the other night.” You started. “(Y/N), I mean it, It’s fine.” Theresa chuckled as you two took a walk around the block. She recommended these walks to induce labor sooner after you complained about being tired of the persistent pelvic pain. You would push through it to walk with Theresa and Saoirse to the pantry or daycare to pick up supplies on her way home. Theresa made sure that she bundled her up well as it had been particularly windy this winter. “I can’t believe I overcooked the venison. It's harder for them to hunt in the winter, so I really hate wasting food this time of year.” “It wasn’t a waste, we still ate it.” “It was tough and dry. It was more like jerky instead of a roast.” You pouted. “Can’t believe I forgot it in the oven. Joel was right to call me stubborn for not using the timer.” “They call that pregnancy brain. You can't help it.” She laughed comfortingly. “I had it too.” “I suppose that makes me feel a bit better.”

Earlier that week, Theresa was finally able to take Joel up on his offer to come over for dinner and finally be introduced to you in person. Before that, it had just been two weeks of talking on the ham radio. Your chats would only be a half hour tops since the stables, where the radio she used was located, was not as warm as her house. She told you once that she read before the fungal plague, it was common to have your baby take a nap outside in Sweden. Something about the brisk fresh air aided in good sleep. She took those trips as an opportunity to try it out, telling you about how bundling the little one up and parking her hand-me-downed stroller at the door of the stable worked like a charm. If the idea was odd to you as someone from the north-east, it surely would not sit right with Mr. Texas. 

You were surprised that she hadn’t brought her baby over for dinner. She didn’t say that she wouldn’t through the radio but once she showed up, she explained that she hardly ever had time away to just be an adult and not just a mom, so she found a babysitter. You and Joel understood that. He learned to believe that it truly took a village to raise a child and was lucky to have had as much help as he did as a teen dad.

Theresa blended into your life surprisingly well from the start, almost as if a kindred spirit. She made you feel so comfortable with the idea of motherhood and was very kind to Ellie. Joel always kept reservations about people in general, but you noticed nothing of real concern from him, especially after he noticed how much you’d begun opening up physically. He made a mental note to thank Wendy one of these days.

You even felt comfortable enough to talk to her about intimate things; things about your ever changing body and marital issues. You knew that Joel wouldn’t want you to share the latter, but you felt that those issues stemmed from a sense of low self esteem. Theresa had a way with words and it really seemed to get through to you better than anyone else. That was Joel’s goal, so he ultimately couldn’t be mad at that, you thought.

She became something like the sister-you-never-had and you couldn’t wait to formally meet her baby. You had yet to hold or so much as see her from being completely bundled up. You thought about yours and hers growing up together; imagining a more comfortable Ellie babysitting the two. The daydreams were a heartwarming glimpse into a life that you never imagined you’d have even before the fungal outbreak.

*********

With only a handful of weeks left in your pregnancy, Tommy started to reduce Joel’s shifts. Used to keeping active, he immediately felt weird about it, but overall knew that he wanted to be there for you. 

Recently, you entered your final phase of the pregnancy: nesting. Honestly, it did annoy Joel when he couldn’t find things. You’d constantly move them around claiming that it was not the perfect location or baby proofed. Joel couldn’t afford to properly baby proof his home when Sarah was born, but she never got seriously hurt, so he didn’t think too much about changing their home. He only imagined it a bit more messy with toys and such. Despite all of that, he admired your ingenuity as he watched you DIY padding for table corners. 

Joel found that this phase would annoy you too, but only when he was involved. He always seemed to be in your way and asked too often if you needed help. Ultimately, his solution was to do something outside of the house to give you some space. This is what started one of his biggest home projects to date.

Chicken pox broke out at the daycare which delayed Ellie moving in. Her initial response to the dinner where you asked if she wanted to live with you two was positive yet reserved, but by the end of the meal, Ellie showed how ecstatic she was to join the family. While she was still on the mends of sickness, Joel decided to finish his surprise for her so it could be ready once she was fully healed. 

A sigh of satisfaction left Joel’s mouth when he opened the door to the garage; the renovation was almost complete. You suggested to him that she might like to have the garage because she was a preteen currently sharing a room with 5 other girls and may want space. He argued that you were overcompensating and offering too much space as the garage was twice the size of the master. You rebutted, expressing fear that she may feel smothered if you two forced her to stay in the craft room which was right next door to them and the nursery. It was also slightly smaller than the nursery. Joel, on the other hand, was more than fine with packing up his woodworking things and moving it into the basement or garage to keep her close by. Besides, he knew that soon enough she would be a full fledged teen and was afraid of experiencing the rebellious teenage years that he only got a taste of with Sarah. He wasn't ready to catch any unexpected visitations of the male variety alone with her in the garage. 

Despite you two being the closest people to Ellie at the settlement, you knew that her moving in was a big, new transition in her life on top of the trauma that she was nowhere near finished processing. Their views on assuming what was best for her were too opposing to save her bedroom location as a surprise. They eventually decided to let Ellie choose where she wanted to stay on the property. 

Joel was proud of his handy work and hoped that she would like her new room. Seeing it set up as a living space again reminded him of when you lived there after you two moved to Jackson. He couldn’t help but decorate it based off of Sarah’s room as that was the only preteen girl he knew, but also made sure he scattered some stuff of Ellie’s around to make it feel familiar. While quarantined at the daycare, she worked to pack the rest of what she owned, which was not much. The memories of his daughter and your distance from him at the beginning mixed in with the room’s future use brought up bittersweet emotions.

He took a break from the garage to have lunch. The faint sound of your cries traveled down into the kitchen. It took only a few moments for it to hit Joel’s ears again as he stopped what he was doing to confirm it wasn't in his head. Immediately, his protective mode activated and he sprinted up the stairs to see what was wrong. 

You were standing in the ensuite bathroom with the door open. He found you topless, weeping in front of the mirror. His eyes immediately went to your chest as if it was his first time ever seeing a pair of breasts. He only ever gets to see yours lately in glimpses. They were larger with fresh stripes patterned across them. Your areolas were larger, darker and noticeably puffy. He cautiously approached you, surprised that you did not cover up or back away. You were genuinely at a loss and needed help. 

“Nothing’s working.” You sniffled. “What’s not working, darlin’?” He gently attempted to pull you into a hug. You hissed when your nipple barely scratched the fabric of his worn out sweatshirt. “’m sorry.” He whispered. “Baby, what’s wrong?” “They hurt so bad! I didn’t think this would happen already. Dr. Carson didn’t say that I would need to pump so early!” Your voice was laced with frustration. “The pressure was never this bad—” “Why didn’t you say anythin’?” “It was never this bad before; barely felt it. It would leak, so I put towels in my bra. The pressure would relieve itself and then build back up and leak again." Tears continued to stream down your face. "This morning though...they feel like they're going to explode right off my chest. They won't even leak. The pamphlet said that massaging them would ease the pain, so that’s what I did and it helped at first, but it came back. It said that the milk gets stuck if it just sits there. I'm trying to pump it out but the damn thing...” You sobbed. “What’d you mean stuck?” “Something in the milk causes it to harden.” You pouted. “The baby isn’t even here yet so I can’t breastfeed and I can’t figure out the fucking hand pump. It’s not fucking staying on and I…” You pointed to it laying on the tiled floor. “I kinda broke it and…and the pamphlet said that it would only get worse if I don’t get the milk out!” You cried out all at once. “It said my ducts could get completely clogged and that it could lead to fever and infection!” You leaned your head on his shoulder as you rambled and he rubbed his hands up and down your back. “It feels like fucking rocks are trying to come out; they're so fucking heavy!” Your tone became one of defeat. “I don’t know what else to do, Joel. I feel so bad; That was the doctor’s only pump.” You tuck your head into his chest and Mumble, “Just fucking cut them off of me. I don’t care anymore.” “Here, sit down for me, ok baby?” Joel guided you to the toilet. “Where’s the pamphlet?” Joel couldn’t help but find you adorable. Even though he knew you were in real pain, it reminded him of when you’d sometimes act out melodramatically to get his attention and it did always get his attention. “I’ve read through it all, front to back. I tried everything it told me to do. Hot towel compress, massage them…and I did it exactly as they said.” You responded as you pointed out the bathroom door into the bedroom. In large font, the front of the tri-fold read 'Breastfeeding 101'. Joel picked it up and returned to you. “Some came out earlier, but nothing now. I haven’t hated my boobs since high school when I first got stretch marks.” Joel chuckled lightly, thinking that you were making light of it yourself until he heard your sobs again. He came back into the bathroom with the pamphlet, reviewing it himself just in case you missed something.

“Umm…ok” Joel too was at a loss. He never encountered this issue with Sarah’s mom. He knew that she ultimately decided not to breastfeed, but if she had any issues with it, she didn’t share it with him. Despite their intimacy, she understandably shared most of her maternal struggles with her own mom. “Let’s try something new, alright? First, let’s get you comfortable.” “How am I supposed to get comfortable?” “You’re gonna lay down for starters, now c’mon.” Joel helped you up and walked you to the bed. “Feel better?” “A little.” You whimpered. “I promise I will make you feel better.” He said in his soft twang. He kissed your forehead before sprinting back to the bathroom to soak another towel in freezing cold water. “Warning, its gonna be real cold.” You watched as he gingerly shifted each breast to fully cover every inch of your chest. “Let that sit there and I’ll be right back.” He began to sprint towards the door when you stopped him. “Where are you going?” “I’m gonna go call Dr. Carson from the craft room. I’ll just be down the hall.” “Please don’t leave.” Your voice was not only laced with defeat, but with desperation. It pulled at Joel’s heartstrings badly. “Darlin’, I know you’re in pain now, but maybe the doc has some pain meds or they found another pump.” He expressed. His doe eyes gave you one last look. Your silence was his response to go. 

As he walked down the hall to their ham radio, Joel thought about what would happen if there actually was no other pump. The medicine was only temporary; it’d only mask her issues until it wore off. He heard you request that they be cut off, but what if it actually came to something like that; surgery? The only other time you were ever meant to have surgery was at the Firefly hospital, St. Mary’s. Joel’s fists subconsciously tightened at the thought of you being on an operating table for something that wasn’t yet life threatening. What if Carson had never done a procedure like that before? What if you bled out? Then, another disturbing thought popped into his head. The doctor, assumingly a bit younger than himself, would probably try to manually pump her while sedated before deciding on a procedure. Another man’s hands on your chest, kneading and massaging them. Joel’s mind snapped out of it when you began to moan and whimper. His own hands, out of muscle memory, had already turned on the radio and tuned to the infirmary’s frequency. 

“Carson!” He let go of the button as he frantically waited for a response. “Neil!” He tried again. “Son of a bitch” He whispered under his breath. Joel contemplated whether he should make a run for it down to the infirmary or not.  “Can I help you?” Another, younger, man’s voice responded. “Where’s Carson?” “He’s in surgery right now and we just started. Is this urgent?” “Yes. Listen, this is Joel Miller and—” “I know who you are.” “My wife, she’s in severe pain.” “Is she dying?” “She’s pregnant!” “Is she in labor?” “No, but—” “You need to understand, there’s not many of us and it's all hands on deck for this surgery. I’m sorry.” “Listen, do y'all have a breast pump?" The man on the other line sighed as if he was too busy for this. "I don't think so. We did, but some couple checked it out already. The scavenging groups already know to be on the lookout for more." "Nothing?" Joel exclaimed desperately. “Sir, I will let Dr. Carson know about your situation post op, but he needs to focus. He hasn’t done a ruptured appendix since before. In the meantime, I will send someone to drop off some painkillers; something strong. Hopefully that will help until we can make it over.” Joel let out a weary sigh as he wiped a hand across his face. “Thank you.” He had no choice but to accept the reality. He dreaded going back to tell you the news, so he took his time heading downstairs to put some ice in a bowl.  “Is he coming?” You asked when Joel finally arrived at the bedroom door. He brought his eyes up to meet yours. They were apologetic as he shook his head. 

Joel knew something had to happen and it was now or never. You felt the bed sink as he laid on the other side of you. He sat up, hovering over you as much as he could and pulled back the damp towel. Your skin was less red, which Joel figured was a good thing. He reached his arm back to the end table beside the bed and grabbed a few cubes of ice. You watched as his veiny hands slid them up and down your skin. He would start up top, then slowly rub them in circular motions almost down to your nipples. Your skin was still very warm, so the ice wasn’t uncomfortable. As calloused as his were, the ice hardly affected his bare skin either. Your eyes were closed with your head laid back against the pillow as you tried to focus on relief. The melted beads of water dripped off the tip of your nipple onto your belly. Joel salivated, turned on by the extremely tempting thought to lick them off, but ultimately knew it was not the time. He even held back a deep moan that built up in his throat as he began to eye fuck you.

A faint knock barely pulled Joel’s concentration. “I think I heard someone at the door.” His voice came out low, almost raspy. “Here,” He grabbed your hand, leaving a chaste kiss on the palm before laying it on top of the ice that he left on your chest. “Keep going for me. That’d better be your medicine…”.  Joel swung the door open and only found a cloth tied up like a pouch by his feet. Opening it, he found 3 oval, white pills and a note: Acetaminophen. Take one every 8-12 hours. This should hold her. He brought them upstairs with a glass of water. Your eyes opened when he entered the room. Your wet hands pushed yourself up into a seated position. “Easy.” Joel warned warmly. “They melted.” “I’ve got more in this bowl for you.” “I like it better when you do it.” Joel smirked deviously. “I liked it better when I did it too. Now, how’re you feelin’? The pain.” “They still feel so heavy, but the pain isn’t as bad anymore. My skin is a little numb.” “Good, I reckoned we’d try cold instead since the hot towels were making my baby cry. I’ve got some pain killers for you too. This should last you the rest of the day.” He handed you the pill and water.

After a few moments, you scooched down to lay back and Joel took a couple more cubes of ice in his hands and repeated the earlier motions until they melted too. His hands stayed there against your skin. He felt the knots that clogged your ducts and began kneading them out in every direction.

Within the hour, the two of you felt the difference; The knots were dissipating. Trying something different, he cupped each breast in his palms, practically engulfing them. The pads of his fingers slid up and down your stretch marks, dragging your nipples between them. You hissed at the overstimulation rather than the previous stinging burn. Joel whispered sweet nothings in that Texan drawl that you fell in love with. He increased the pressure once you gave him the ok. A faintly audible moan of relief escaped your lips as a bead of milk began to form. Joel watched as it grew bigger until gravity allowed it to fall, like the melted ice, onto the back of his hand. He kept up his pace. Various consistencies leaked out until it became a steady trickle. His fingers moved down and began to knead your nipple with his thumbs, lubricating them in hopes that it would soften the calluses. They perked up at his touch. His hands began to cramp up a while ago, but the progress encouraged him to continue for a bit longer.

Joel abruptly stopped to reposition himself on the bed and give his hands a break. Laying on his side, he propped himself up with one hand and gently grasped the same breast with the other. Thinking he just needed a new angle to get comfortable, you finally let your eyes close to focus on the pending relief. 

Joel finally looked at you and found your face to be serene. It gave him the confidence to play on his previous thoughts. He gently lifted your soft breast and licked the underside curve until his tongue met your nipple. The pad of it applied pressure flat onto the perked tip until he heard you hiss again. His lips, then, fully wrapped around it. He stayed there like that for a moment, barely moving his tongue around you to give you a chance to adjust to the new sensation.

The feeling shot ripples of pain and pleasure through your body. You hardly moved, opting to stare straight up at the ceiling. As if given permission, Joel’s tongue began to circle your nipple more tightly. He watched your fingers grip the covers beneath you.

The flow of warm liquid was new to him. Instinctively, he let it slide down his throat. Joel would be lying if he said that it didn’t taste a bit sweet. He had long become accustomed to drinking his coffee black since acquiring beans was a luxury all on its own, but it reminded him of his favorite brand of creamer from before the outbreak. It brought his mind back to when things were normal. It was a comfortable and cozy feeling. He couldn’t help but feel weird about the connection that his brain was making, but he also couldn’t help this sort of primal urge for more; more nostalgia, more of you.

Joel was a mess or at least he was about to be. The sound of your whimpers and moans unleashed a flood of arousal to his cock. He realized that milk drunkenness was a real thing when it began to sneak up on him. If he wasn’t careful to keep some semblance of sobriety, he’d find himself making a mess in his pants in no time.

Between the rush of blood down south and the flow of milk down his throat, his body was becoming flushed with heat. He wanted to strip down right there and then, if not to relieve his own pressure but to tease you with his tip. He willed himself not to, however, because you still needed relief. He needed to focus on you not him.

The heat of his breath on your skin added to your own haziness. He had every intention of sucking you dry before moving on to the other, but he needed a breather. He didn’t realize that his beard was slightly wet until he rested his chin on the space between your breasts. You brought your fingers up to linger through his hair. 

“Look at me.” Joel panted, reaching up to tilt your head down. “How you feelin’, darlin’?” A medley of breathless whimpers was all you could muster as a response. Your mind was already mush and you wanted to keep it that way. The pain of the other breast was almost nonexistent; almost. Joel smirked. “Can you handle more?” He rubbed the side of your thigh as you nodded. “Say it.” “Yes.”

Expecting him to go straight to the other breast, he sat up and pulled his sweatshirt over his head and tossed it on the floor. Next, he slid your panties down your thicker thighs and let it fall in the same direction. He used his knee to spread your legs before splaying his fingers across your thighs to get a good grasp on them. With a little more aggression than he meant, Joel pulled your entire body down the bed so you could lay flat. Sliding a hand underneath the small of your back, he lifted you up just enough to place a couple of pillows under you for support. He, then, disappeared past where you could see and tucked his head between your thighs. You could hardly run your fingers through his hair in this position, but he easily managed to reach one hand up to grope your other breast.

He dragged his tongue flat across the length of your lower lips, settling onto the bud of nerves at the top. His other hand was preoccupied with making sure your legs stayed wide open for him. They always had a penchant for snapping shut around him, something he usually enjoyed. He knew his work was more sloppy when that happened, allowing himself to succumb to the mind swimming pleasure of being pussy drunk. That night, however, he wanted to focus on you more than revel in his own satisfaction. 

He continued to massage your engorged breast with your nipple rolling in between the tips of his fingers. Your clit revealed itself more as he blew cold air on it, giving him permission to take it completely into his mouth. His tongue swirled and sucked in a quick, continuous motion. He squeezed your nipple between his fingers harder, making you arch your back, until the dam broke. Enough of the clots had passed and now milk was streaming. A scream escaped your lips as you began to transition from pain to pure pleasure.

The motion of his tongue slowed, much to your dismay. As swiftly as he could, he switched spots. Your clit only ached and throbbed for a few moments before it found comfort between his slick and calloused fingers. Like your nipples, he squeezed and rolled.

Above, he continued to suck you dry like his life depended on it and it kind of did now that it was no longer a trickle. Beads of your creamy white dribbled through his beard and down his neck. You began to feel overstimulated before even reaching release. All you wanted as relief from the pressure, but you had to tap his shoulder to beckon him up and give you a break. What you saw in his eyes when they locked on to your was pure, feral lust. Despite his mouth now only hovering over your breasts, he allowed his fingers to continue. His eyes silently dared you to tell him to stop. Your hips continued to buck up into his hand. He adored the look on your face as you took him so well. The way your body reacted to his aroused him so much that he couldn't help but focus back onto his own building pressure. Joel repositioned himself a bit, straddling your one leg between his two and started to grind his hips up and down. The relief was minimal as he preferred to be inside you. He also preferred to be naked. The denim rubbing against your skin made you notice that he was still clothed from the waist down. Gently, you pushed him off, earning yourself the famous “Joel Glare”, something he couldn't help giving you as he didn't appreciate the immediate build up of pressure again. His eyes quickly softened and he felt a bit guilty as he picked up on your intentions when you began to unbuckle his jeans.

Joel fought the urge to help since it took you a moment, but opted to just enjoy the show as your fingers adorably fumbled over each other in anticipation. They gingerly brushed across the trail of dark hair on his lower stomach with all of your attempts. Still straddling your left thigh, he bit his lip at the sight. Finally undone, Joel took over to quickly get them all the way off, briefs included. When his cock sprung free, you saw that he’d already made a mess of himself with precum steadily dribbling out like a faucet not quite turned off. At that moment, you didn’t know what you wanted more, to take as much of him in your mouth as you could or guide him to your still wet cunt.

Luckily, he made the decision for you. “Eyes here.” He smirked, wanting your full attention. “Are you ready for me?” You laid back and nodded your head. “What'd I say? I need to hear that pretty, sexy voice of yours.” This was the most intimate he’d been with you in several months and his feelings were all coming to a head. “Yes! I need you so bad right now, please!” You desperately exclaimed. He lowered himself close to your ear for just a moment. "Your wish has always been my command, baby girl."

Abruptly, Joel turned you onto your side and threw aside the pillows. He replaced them as your support, allowing your body to lean back towards his. You felt the hair on his chest brush against your back. He slid his arm around your chest to pull you in closer. His fingers rolled between your nipple to milk out the last of it. Your insides were throbbing around nothing and you needed him to fill you, feel you; to know that what your body was doing was not of your own accord, but by his. All of your worries and self conscious thoughts were long gone. You didn’t care anymore; you were just horny for him.

He proceeded still with a bit of caution despite picking up on your body language, afraid you'd suddenly recoil from him. He could let himself go feral and fuck you into oblivion from behind, but thought this was a better position to start with; the two of you could always do work your way up to that later. With one hand slid between your thighs, he lifted your leg up. With his other, he stroked his cock a few more times to get it good and slick. It twitched with anticipation as he lined it with your entrance. 

Joel couldn’t help but release a low, guttural moan right in your ear just after the tip slid in. He wanted to cum so bad already and he didn’t even have the pleasure to be fully inside you yet. You didn’t even give him a moment to gather his bearings before you scooched backwards, sheathing him further inside. Your walls barely fluttered against him. He released, coating every inch of them in ropes of cum. Just like he did to you, you milked him dry. You kept a vice grip on him as your walls still pulsed to bring your own release even as you felt him soften. You forgot how amazing it felt to be so stuffed and full. 

Over and over, he huffed your name through breaths. His voice was deep and raspy. His hand struggled to find purchase on your body, not wanting to hurt you, so he could redirect his overstimulation. You felt his breath panting in your ear as he aggressively cupped your inner thigh. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” He repeated as he finally began to come down. He peppered wet kisses behind your ear lobe. “Hmm?” Off in your own world. “I just need a moment to catch up. Then, we’ll finish. I promise.” “Take your time.” You said, feeling pretty relaxed none-the-less. Joel peaked over and watched as you tried to finish riding the wave to get yourself off.

You untangled your legs from his and repositioned yourself for better reach of your clit all with your eye closed. It amazed you how much you no longer cared about how you looked. All you wanted was to cum and you were fine if he didn’t get you there that time. You would make sure that he made it up to you later. He watched as your back arched up off the bed as much as it could despite being weighed down by your belly. Breathy whimpers escaped your lips. Your legs stiffly straightened while your toes curled as you found what you’d been looking for. The way you looked, the way you sounded; it was an experience Joel was privileged to behold and it quickly aroused him all over again.

Between your and his cum, you felt so filthy that you didn’t even want to move. Joel was too engrossed in gazing at you, even minutes after you caught your breath. He was usually punctual about aftercare, but still he laid there next to you. Without even turning to meet his gaze, your hand reached out to find his partially flaccid cock and began to gently play with it. Your goal wasn’t to get it back up just yet, but to just be blissfully intimate. His eyes followed your hand and watched you make contact. He hissed a bit when your nails dragged across his sensitive length. 

“Jesus woman, what are you doin’ to me?” He asked. “What are you doing to me?” You retorted with the same question with a giggle. “God, you're so beautiful." His low, roughly velvet voice stated lovingly. "Stop." You blushed with a shy grin which made him smile widely. "I must not be complimenting you enough if you still don't feel good about taking them." You shied away playfully by sliding away to the other side of the bed. Joel immediately scooched over to follow you, leaving his body flush against yours to spoon. "You never did that before.” Joel quipped in reference to masturbating in front of him. “Yes I have.” "Not with me. I never saw you touch yourself...like that. You usually wait for me to get my bearin's so I take care of you proper." "I do wait for you but I do also touch myself when you're not around." "Why didn't I know this?" "You jealous you're hands aren't the only one's touching me?" You joked. "Yes ma'am I am when you put it like that." "My hands are the next best things when you're not around. But if it's any consolation, I imagine they're yours." "You better be." He replied coyly. "But if it's any consolation to you, Darlin', I'll be around much more often, so you won't be needin' your imagination." He pinched your chin gently and turned your head to face him, taking your lips into his. It was a loving, drawn out sort of kiss. "How're ya feelin'? If you need me to go back in and...um...relieve some pressure for you," Joel cocked his brow and shrugged. "I'll take good care of you. And I don't want you gettin' all shy about it neither." He gingerly groped your breasts from behind. You turned around in his arms and cupped his face with your hand. “I think there's still some left for you to take care of but they don't hurt anymore. You did make me feel better just like you promised you would.” You leaned in for a kiss. If you weren’t completely grounded in that moment, you would have missed his bottom lip tremble a bit. The movement of your legs immediately reminded you of the mess that both of you made.  Joel heard the faint, tacky sound and whispered. “Don’t worry about that. I’ll get us cleaned up.” He began to roll away when you put your hand on his chest. “No, I’ll get up. I have to pee anyway.” “Nah, I’ma get up.” A grunt escaped his lips as he sat up. “Joel….” “I never made you clean up before and I sure as shit ain’t gon’ start makin’ you do it now.” His features softened and his voice deepened as he leaned down to reach your lips. “Am I understood?” You smirked. “Yes, sir.” He pecked your lips before slipping out of bed completely naked. You listened to the water run from the ensuite. Anticipation grew within you, as if it was your first time, as you waited. Joel clicked his tongue, announcing his return. “Dagum, you’re a fucking sight, you know that?” The left corner of his lips curled up as he gazed at how the sheets draped around your body.

Tenderly, he pulled the sheets away, spread your legs further apart and sat between them. Using two fingers, he circled your entrance with the soothing cloth. Your faint mewling did not miss his ears. 

In a clean transition, Joel removed the cloth from the equation. His middle and ring finger took one more lap around your labias before sliding inside of you. His thumb kneaded your still sensitive bud, causing a crescendo to begin building. Almost like a spasm, your hips bucked erratically in retaliation to his thick fingers going in deeper to find your spot. It hadn’t been touched in so long, you forgot how quickly he could find it; how well he knew your body. They slid in further, knuckles deep. The metal of his wedding band cooled your hot flesh. Your walls were clenching tight around his fingers. Always obliging, he went faster when you begged. He made sure to make you do that first, however. The way you begged so sweetly went straight to his cock and in almost no time, it was engorged and at attention again. He fit a third finger from his other hand inside you to gather enough slick to slide onto his shaft. Between both hands, Joel tried to keep an even rhythm, but knew he was getting sloppy. Your walls were beginning to contract erratically too. He knew it was time for everything to come to a head. 

“Alright, you ready for me?” Joel asked? “I’ve been ready! Joel, I'm gonna cum." Joel couldn’t help but chuckle at your bluntness. “Not yet, Darlin'. Get on your hands and knees.” He watched the shock on your face and couldn’t tell if it was from his fingers abruptly leaving you empty or because you hadn’t explored that position in a while. “C’mon baby,” He helped you up and around. “Ass up, front and center, now.” He positioned himself behind you, his warm hands massaging your ass before sliding them down your back to push you into the pillow. “I ain’t hurtin’ you, am I?” “Uh, uh.” You shook your head against the pillow. Your legs were snapped shut squeezing, not wanting your clit to die back down. He slapped your right cheek. “What was that?” “No!” You yipped in return. “You’re not hurting me.” “Gon’ tell me if I do, you hear me?” Joel could’ve sworn you called him daddy after you answered yes. It was all muffled by the pillow, but it was still enough for him.

He grabbed as much of your ass as he could in his hands. He loved how supple they felt in his hands. He gave a harsh squeeze as a test, to which you moaned. He stopped himself from spreading your legs apart and instead eased his cock in between your thighs. You felt how it just rubbed against your clit. Joel could’ve cum right there and then, but wanted to be inside you. That was his ultimate goal; his prize. He’d be damned if he let that opportunity slip again. 

With one hand gripping your hips and the other gripping your hair, he eased himself into you. It didn’t take long for him to gradually pick up the pace. His own hips rocked into yours harder and harder, waiting for you to protest but you never did. Your entire body rippled like a wave to his movement. It was the most intense amount of pressure you’d ever felt in your life between feeling like you had a bowing ball stuck inside you and your husband filling you up.

“Mmm” Joel grunted. “focus, now.” Your rhythm was becoming erratic again. His one hand was now splayed across your lower back. The muscles and veins in his arms flexed as his other gripped onto you tighter. “Yes! Like that, baby. Rock back into me.” “Oh fuck, Joel, please.” You exclaimed breathlessly. “Please what?” His excitement increased when you started to beg. “It's too much.” He began to slow down. “Does it hurt, baby? Want me to stop?” A bit of guilt flashed across his eyes.  “Don’t stop. Don’t slow down. It just…I feel so much. I feel like I’m about to explode but like a good explosion.” “That’s the goal, Darlin'. Matter of fact, don’t lose that feelin’ ‘cause I need you to cum for me. Right now.” “No…” You tried to catch your own breath. “No?” He almost took offense.  “I want to feel you first.” You intentionally squeezed around his dick harder. Joel bit his lip and grunted as he fought against his own climax. He almost had to laugh through the pain of holding back. “I don’t think you’ve ever told me no before.”  “Guess there’s a first for everything. Please?” Your voice was so innocent; how could he deny you?  “You know what you gotta do then, right?” “Whatever you want.” “Call me that again.” “Call you what?” “What you said in the pillow there. Thought I didn’t hear you?” “I wanted you to hear me, daddy.” “Fuck me…What am I gonna do with you?” Joel edged himself as much as he could. He wanted to ride the build up just a moment longer. You teased him, saying it again, knowing that you had him in the palm of your hand. “You like that, huh?" “Maybe.” His brows furrowed in concentration as he tried his best. He blew air out between puckered lips to try and steady himself, but it was of no use. His glass overfilled and he had no choice but to let it spill. “I’m cumming, baby. Fuck!”

Though his movements were faster, his hips snapped erratically into you. He didn’t care about rhythm when his mind was going black due to the vice grip you had on him. All his body could focus on was the explosion of hot, sticky cum uncontrollably flooding out of him. You bellowed out this beautiful whine that made his dick, already a sloppy mess, twitch. His hips slowed down as your grip around him loosened. All but the head slid out. He wanted to stay in a little longer when he collapsed onto your back, but between both of your slick, it wasn’t easy.

Not wanting your back to ache, he allowed himself only a moment of rest before sliding out and straightening up. Joel’s eyes caught the translucent cream sliding down your leg. You felt his tongue lap it all the way back up to your entrance. Your weak legs trembled at the touch. “Whoa, steady now.” His hands held your hips before guiding your body to lay back down on your side. While up, he grabbed the cloth and quickly cleaned the two of you up again. 

He couldn’t wait to get back into bed with you after tossing the cloth in the sink. Spooning you from behind, his body fit around yours like a glove. You let him wrap his arms around you and pull you in closer.