#the difference is one of them is from one of the most live wire fandoms of the late 2010s

[jonathanrook]

you know what. thank god mymusic isn't popular i like being able to make scindie fan content. and none of y'all can call me out for it bc what were you doing at the devil's sacrament.

[voxofthevoid]

Hi, I'm sending this to you because you're a prolific goyuu shipper and writer and idk who else to talk to. You don't have to interact with this if you don't want to, which doesn't really need to be said, but I would understand either way.

I have a similar teacher/student ship in jjk I like to read and write about and I have posted about them in the past but it got me anon hate for weeks. I did go on a blocking spree after that but I just always live in fear. Getting mean comments about things I enjoy is such a sour experience, I want to be more indifferent towards all this but I'm still at a place where even a hint of hate threatens to ruin my entire day. I'm afraid to post, there's no community. It's just very abysmal. I guess I'm just here asking you how. How to do it.

I don't mind asks like this, don't worry. One of the (many) reasons I'm open, blatant, and unapologetic about what I ship as well as my overall stance on freedom of creative expression is that present-day fandom is becoming increasingly hostile to darker—or even slightly off-white, to extend the metaphor—themes and tropes in fiction and the people interested in exploring them, and I think it's important for people who aren't part of the moral purity crusade to be equally visible. Not that anyone's obligated to, just that some casual, visible sanity can often make a difference.

I'm so sorry that you had that experience in this fandom. I'm unfortunately not surprised; JJK has no shortage of wankers, and some of them are hateful little fucks who would gladly ruin people's days or lives for whatever endorphin rush their bullying campaign gets them.

That's what these people are at their cores: bullies. It seems like you know that though, and proactive blocking is definitely a good way to prevent or mitigate the damage they can do. But even knowing what they are and what they want, it's not easy for everyone to shake off bad experiences and fears for the future, which seems to be what you're struggling with as well.

The how will vary from person to person. Way I see it, there's an internal aspect and an external one—your mindset and your support system, respectively.

Indifference would be ideal, but it's not feasible for everyone. You can cultivate a certain approach, but in my experience, the way your brain is wired also plays a significant part. Some people are just naturally more thick-skinned or confident or apathetic. I just get angry, for instance, and while that's not exactly easy to wrangle, I tend to calm down on my own once it's out of my system and spite just fuels my creativity. There's no lasting effect beyond an idle thought of "am I gonna have to call anyone a cunt today?" when I post things. Others have different reactions, and plenty of people do shake off the initial fear or stress response to develop a more uncaring attitude, but how you get to that point is up to you, you know?

But if you're currently at a place where seeing hate is not something you can or want to handle (and there's no shame in that), I'd recommend any of these:

Write but don't post. Maybe you're already doing this? But indulging your creativity just by yourself can be a good way to enjoy writing without stressing out over the potential backlash from posting.

Post anonymously.

Posting with guest comments turned off, comment moderation turned on, or comments entirely turned off. Comment moderation would mean you'd still see any bullshit that pops up, so that may not be suitable here. Turning off guest comments will weed out most of the wannabe edgelords, but registered accounts are hardly "safe" either. Of course, if you don't want to post in such a restricted manner (I wouldn't), that's also entirely fair.

Do a mix of these as mood and energy allow.

If you do post in any of these ways, do not look at the bookmarks. Turn anon off on Tumblr too, if you haven't already.

All that said, no matter how thick-skinned you are, most people can and will be worn down by dedicated or even just repeated/frequent harassment. We're human, and fighting off negativity for prolonged periods is fucking exhausting. And this is fandom, not life or death. It is easier at a point to just say fuck it and leave for greener pastures, be it a different fandom, a different fan identity, or a different hobby entirely.

That's where an external support system can help. For me, that's both my personal friends and my readers in general. But I've been in fandom for ten years and have been writing and posting consistently for the bulk of it. I've had time to form connections and a community—one whose members are fluctuating but whose existence is consistent. It takes time or luck or both. And these days, the more social aspects of fandom seem to occur in servers, which is not really my scene, so I don't have much guidance to offer there. But I do know servers specifically aimed at supporting writers of "taboo" content exist, even if I'm not sure how to find them. Tumblr's new Communities feature also seems like it can help you find like-minded folks, be it ship-specific or topic-specific.

From the spaces I do frequent, I'd suggest these:

Join the r/Ao3 subreddit. You don't have to connect it to your fandom identity if you don't want to. But that space is staunchly anti-censorship, and while you may not find close friends or anything, you will find a decent space for various discussions (not always calm or pleasant) and creative endeavours.

Actively seek out chill people in your ship fandom, be it on Tumblr or Ao3. I'm not saying slide into their DMs, just participate in whatever capacity you can alongside people you know ship the same stuff or have the same tastes as you. Build connections the way we typically do in fandom, just with a more discerning eye so that you won't run into anyone who'd turn on you later for your own ships/tastes.

Most importantly, be kind to yourself and take the time you need to recover from the bad experiences you have had.

Good luck ❤️

[kiwiana-writes]

Fic Pride Friday

Thank you to the fabulous @rmd-writes for the tag! As always, though, with 239 fanworks on AO3, this is a beast of a task lmfao.

Rules: Post your favourite line or passage from as many of your published works as you’d like. Let yourself feel proud of your creations! Tag as many people as you post snippets, so your fellow fic friends can be proud, too.

This got long (and I'm like... actively trying not to Feel Bad™️ about that), so four fandoms' worth of snippets under the cut!

Tagging: @agame-writes @affectionatelyrs @anincompletelist @cha-melodius @cricketnationrise

@dumbpeachjuice @firenati0n @getmehighonmagic @happiness-of-the-pursuit @hgejfmw-hgejhsf

@indestructibleheart @inexplicablymine @sparklepocalypse @stereopticons @whimsymanaged

And, of course, an open tag to whoever wants to play!

Red White & Royal Blue

What a beautiful tone aka introspective rimming:

Henry has touched Alex in a thousand different ways since he shook the hand of a beautiful boy with a yellow ipê-amarelo in his pocket and fell in love, so he doesn’t quite understand why he’s trembling as he rolls them both until Alex is on his back, hair spread out on the pillow, lips parted slightly and eyes filled with trust as Henry settles on top of him. With his arms bracketing Alex’s shoulders, Henry places a hand on Alex’s jaw and pours all the love and pride that’s been coursing through his veins since Alex delivered his speech into a deep kiss, his tongue running along Alex’s bottom lip, coaxing it further open. The noise Alex makes in response is devastating. He’s a live wire, arching up into Henry’s touch in a way that is somehow both entirely nonsexual and an unbelievable turn on. Alex moves like he’s trying to crawl inside Henry’s skin, letting out soft moans and shivering gasps that burrow their way between Henry’s fourth and fifth ribs and carve out a place for themselves there, somewhere only Alex has ever reached.

All the Lonely Starbucks Lovers, the coffee shop 5+1 where Alex is so hot it very literally makes Henry stupid:

“How can I do you today?” Bollocksing, buggering fuck. Henry’s going to have to migrate to Tristan Da Cunha. Actually, while that’s the most remote place he knows of, he’s also fairly certain they’re a British Overseas Territory and therefore speak English, which isn’t particularly helpful in his current predicament. He’ll brainstorm, though he expects that the long and sordid history of global British colonisation is really not going to be his friend here. Walking Wet Dream blinks slowly—once, twice—before his face splits into a wide grin. “Tempting fucking offer, sweetheart.” A tongue peeks out to wet a pair of plump lips, which only provides Henry with some extremely vivid ideas for what else might look good between those same lips, and oh Christ, if he actually gets hard underneath this hideous apron he’ll have to lock himself in his own basement. The fact that he doesn’t have a basement is immaterial, really.

A Practical Arrangement, the arranged marriage AU -- tbh I'm proud of ALL of Alex's internal narration about Henry in chapter one but this is a particular favourite:

“I thought Windsor valued courtly manners?” Alex grins widely, tampering down a smirk at the way Henry’s ridiculously chiselled jaw twitches, obviously displeased at the way Alex is going off-script. “As your betrothed, surely you should be showering me with compliments as you greet me?” Henry raises an eyebrow, and looks at Alex in a way that makes him suddenly, viscerally aware of the four inches of height Henry has on him. It’s a height difference that has always put Alex on edge; it never used to be the case, Alex is pretty sure from the vague memories he has of them in their younger years, but between one meeting and the next, suddenly Henry was no longer at his eye level. “As soon as I find something to compliment, I assure you I shall do so.” Alex almost laughs; that was funny. Rude and untrue, but funny. It’s a shocking amount of personality for Henry to display. “Back in Texas, they extol my many virtues, Your Royal Highness,” he drawls, pointedly ignoring June’s scoff. “Do you need me to give you a list?” “I’m sure they do,” Henry says gravely, but there’s a flicker of something at the corner of his mouth that could almost be a smirk. There’s a long pause before he adds: “…in Texas.” Alex’s jaw drops before he can stop it. That absolute fucker.

Kinda think that I might be his type, the Alex and Bea fake dating fic that blew up in a way I wasn't expecting but am forever grateful for; I'm proud of this whole damn fic but this line made me get up and walk away from my computer after writing it lmao:

“Don’t worry, though.” He winks at Bea, tampering down a grin at the way she bites her lip as she realises whatever he’s about to say is at serious risk of making her laugh. “We’re not going to wait until I’m out of school to start popping out great-grandbabies for you. I wanna be papi for real, not just to my little honeypot here, if you know what I mean.” The sharp clatter of Mary’s teacup against her saucer thankfully drowns out the choked wheezing sound from Bea’s throat; Alex only risks glancing at Bea for a moment, just enough to realise she’s fighting for her life not to burst out laughing. He’s not sure how much longer he can keep this up before he sounds like he’s reading lines from a terribly scripted and vaguely racist porno.

Puck It, the college hockey AU with my favourite analogy I've ever written:

Alex is aware that he might be bisexual in the same way he’s aware that he might be allergic to cats; there have been a few brief interactions to make him think it’s probably true, but so far it hasn’t had any impact on his life, so he hasn’t really had a reason to look into it and find out for sure. Now, faced with Henry’s clavicle and the sudden, vivid mental image of sinking his teeth into it, he’s not sure how theoretical it is anymore.

Handprints in wet cement, the 5+1 celebration of Henry's Oxford Slut Phase that is just so important to me:

“It’s not.” Alex’s fingers flex a little, digging into Henry’s skin. “It’s— you had all these experiences, and sometimes I can’t believe you want to share them all with me. That you’ll just tell me about them, and if it’s something we’re both into, we can just… go for it. It means a lot. You know that, right?” Henry blinks at him. If he’s honest, he’s never really understood Alex’s eagerness to hear about Henry’s uni hookups; Henry himself, while not bothered by Alex’s own past, has never felt any particular need to seek out stories about it either. He’d just assumed it was another facet of Alex’s insatiable need to understand things; he hadn’t realised it was important.

I've carried this song in my mind, the Arthur-from-beyond-the-grave fic, have one of the many MANY passages that made me cry to write lmfao:

You don’t need to find Orion, Arthur wants to tell him. I’m in every constellation, in your heart, in your soul. I’m here. I’m always here. But Henry can’t hear him.

Schitt's Creek

Wander Where They Will, aka the swans fic:

It felt like only a moment later that something woke him, though the pitch-black room made it obvious it had been several hours since he dozed off. It had been so long since he was in such close proximity to other people that David didn’t realise what he was hearing, at first. The gasp that rang out in the silence made his eyes snap open and his body tense up, and there was a thump and a high-pitched, muffled moan before the realisation slammed into him. He shifted in the bed, trying to block out the sounds out of a sense of… privacy, he supposed, or decorum. That must be why his stomach was clenching, so tight he could barely breathe. Patrick, it seemed, approached lovemaking the way David has seen him approach everything else—quiet, determined, methodical. All the noises coming from their corner of the cottage seemed to be Rachel’s; only a rhythmic panting betrayed Patrick’s part in the process. Even at the end, he barely made a sound. David couldn’t help thinking, as silence filled the cottage and pulled him backwards into sleep, that it was a terrible shame; that everyone deserved the kind of pleasure that rushed through them, untamed and uncontrollable.

Femslash February 2021, where I decided one entry needed to not only be a drabble (100 words exactly) like every other day's prompt, but ALSO a sonnet:

A princess resides in a castle fair Who Stevie beholds when sneaking ashore— With aquamarine eyes and golden hair, She’s all that Stevie is so longing for. If she had legs, or the princess a tail, Perhaps Stevie could be part of her world— But fate's harsh currents their union assails, Separating them with an eddy's whirl. So Stevie lingers, and watches, and dreams About a union between sea and land, Wishing it weren't as complex as it seems For them to lie together on the sand. But unbeknownst, a princess dreams, too— Of a raven-haired mermaid, pure and true.

And all the rest's illusion, the fic where Patrick works through his feelings about the word queer and every single comment made me cry:

And that’s really the crux of the issue, because it’s not that he’s uncomfortable in his sexuality. If he was, that would be easier to explain — right from the start, David never put a label onto him. Patrick was the one who’d whispered I’m gay into the sliver of space between them that night at Stevie’s, and David had just given him the same easy smile and nod that Patrick’s sure he would have received if instead his declaration had been I’m bi or I’m pan or I don’t know right now. His discomfort is more of a nagging, deep-seated fear that he’s not entitled to queer; that because he’s never been called a slur or worried about whether or not it was safe to kiss his partner in public or even come out to his parents, the word isn’t his to reclaim.

I haven't met the new me yet, the fic where I just dragged everyone onto the Jake/Rachel train with me by force, no I don't care that they never met in canon:

Despite herself, her eyes keep finding her way back to one of the pool players. He’s tall and well-built, with a close-cropped beard; he carries himself easily, joking with his friend, the flannel shirt stretching across his back as he lines up his next shot. When he stands up after sinking the ball easily, he turns around too quickly for Rachel to pretend she was looking elsewhere and their eyes meet. The smile he gives her isn’t quite cocky, though it’s close; it’s just confident, and confidence has always done something for her. She smiles back before picking up her beer, draining the last of it and trying not to grin around the neck of the bottle when his eyes drop to her throat as she does. She’d forgotten how good it can feel, to flirt with a stranger across a… okay, this isn’t exactly a crowded room, but still. Across a room. She doesn’t make any secret of watching as the guy and his friend finish up the game, the one she’s watching sinking the black easily with several of the stripes still on the table, and he hands his cue to his friend before striding over to the bar and leaning over to get the bartender’s attention.

Meet me out at the end of my rope, aka angstapalooza. The outline @ships-to-sail gave me for the end of chapter three just read "David leaves after possibly the most tender but heart wrenching kiss they’ve ever had, that’s ever been written, ever, in the history of written kissing" and then I had to... write that???

Patrick puts the box down gently before he holds his hand out. When David places the key in his palm Patrick wraps his fingers around David’s, their palms pressed together. Despite everything, it still feels like coming home; before he quite realises what he’s doing he presses Patrick back into the doorframe, his free hand wrapping around Patrick’s neck as he pours all the emotion swirling around inside him into one final kiss. Patrick, for his part, tugs David in close, his fingers winding through David’s hair as he shakes under David’s touch. When David finally pulls away he can see Patrick’s cheeks are wet with tears, and he knows his are too. He doesn’t know if they’re his own or Patrick’s or both. Patrick stares at him, his tone helpless. “You’re the love of my life, David Rose.” David closes his eyes as his resolve almost breaks. When he opens them again, Patrick’s face is blurry and indistinct in front of him as he tries not to let more tears fall. “No one is ever going to love me the way you did.” The words are choked out, but when Patrick opens his mouth to reply David shakes his head to stop him. “But no one ever lied to me like you did, either.”

How much love will you happily take -- I apparently awakened a humiliation kink in multiple people with this one and I will never not be proud of that 🤣

“No, that’s not— it’s not for lack of trying.” David being so kind about this is making it ten times harder to spit the words out and he drops his gaze, picking at Stevie’s faded bedspread so he doesn’t have to see the look in David’s eyes. He can feel the all-too-familiar crackle of humiliation crawling up his spine, knows his embarrassment is clear on his face, and it makes his throat tighten and his stomach clench and his cock twitch and he hates it, loves it, wants to poke at it like a bruise until it consumes him. “It’s been, um, a size issue?” There’s a beat, and then David is placing a gentle finger under his chin and turning Patrick to face him. His face is warm and open and Patrick likes him so much it’s kind of terrifying; he desperately needs this night not to end up another disaster.  “That,” David says, voice soft, “is only an issue if we make it an issue. And I don’t plan on making it an issue.”

Wearing glass slippers, I got my Chucks, the Stevie/Alexis tattoo/flower shop AU my beloved:

“Did people send you flowers when your aunt passed away?” Alexis asks pointedly.  “Yeah.” She doesn’t say, It was a huge pain in the ass, actually, because I had to throw them all out when they died, but from the look Alexis is giving her at least some of that must show on her face.  “Congratulations and commiserations,” she says slowly. “That’s when everyone wants to give flowers: births, deaths, weddings, anniversaries. It’s like, human nature or whatever. There’s something…” she takes a deep breath. “It’s a sign of trust, I think. To be a tiny part of someone’s biggest moments like that. Even if just from the sidelines.” Stevie has tattooed children’s names and wedding bands, handprints and pawprints and important dates. She’s never thought about it quite like that before. “I get that,” she murmurs. 

Great Acoustics, aka the cast did a Zoom thing in-character during Covid and had a throwaway line to justify David and Patrick not being in the same room and I just entered a fugue state and wrote porn about it in like an hour:

They make it ten days before their first noise complaint, which is frankly about nine days longer than David expected. They’ve been worse than usual, to be fair, with something as simple as a lockable door apparently now an aphrodisiac to both of them. Patrick goes about twelve shades of red when the official notice is pushed under their door, and then the pillow makes a reappearance.  It’s all very fucking hot, actually, seeing buttoned-up, in-control Patrick reduced to a whimpering, begging, uncontrollable mess. Eventually, David manages to convince him that if something must go in his mouth during sex, there are several better options. No, not that. Well, obviously, sometimes that.

A focused moment made, kinkverse part one that I very much intended to be a oneshot lmfao RIP

For a few moments, the only sound is their combined harsh breathing as they recover. Almost before David realises what’s happening he’s being pulled gently to his feet, and then Patrick is framing David’s face in his hands and kissing him soundly. And David’s been kissed a lot during a scene, and a few times before one, but never once has someone kissed him in a sex club after they’ve already come. He lets out a startled but not unhappy yelp and Patrick takes the opportunity to plunge his tongue into David’s now-open mouth, chasing the taste of himself, making them both groan. Finally Patrick releases him with one last, almost chaste, kiss. He drops one hand but leaves the other on David’s cheek, gazing carefully at him, his face soft and open. “I’ve never done that before, with a guy,” Patrick confesses after a moment of silence.  David raises an eyebrow, quirks a lip. “The flogging or the blowjob?” “Uh,” Patrick scratches the back of his head as he flushes slightly. “Both? But also, um.” His eyes flicker down to David’s lips and back up, and David gives a soft little Oh of understanding.  “Baby dom and baby gay, huh?”

Your heart is keeping time with me, the 50 First Dates AU that I think has the best ending I've ever written? So, uh, spoilers-ish, I guess:

This isn’t a romantic comedy. There will be no miraculous, medically impossible recovery. Every morning for the rest of his life, David will wake up and have to be told that he has a husband he doesn’t recognise; a husband who loves him. But after he’s been told, Patrick will set out to prove it to him, with laughter and music and patient understanding. And because love is so much more than conscious memory, David will go to sleep each night in Patrick’s arms, safe and secure and content. Even though it’s not a film or a fairytale, they will still live happily ever after.

Other

We always walked a very thin line, aka the fic I furiously spite-wrote in three hours after watching Happiest Season lmfao:

When they were little, they were convinced if they practised enough they could develop some sort of psychic link; talk to each other over long distances without tying up the phone lines their dads always used for important business calls. They gave up eventually, but Riley finds herself desperately wishing for the talent now. Come on, Harper. Be braver for her than you were for me. “She’s lying!” The words burst hysterically out of Harper’s mouth, and Riley’s heart sinks.

We knew we were the fortunate ones, because obviously I watched episode 3 of The Last Of Us and immediately started writing, what do you take me for?

He knows that the last four years have been kinder to him than to almost anyone else; he also knows that he doesn’t look like those men in the magazines, the ones he used to drive thirty miles out of his way to buy, shoulders hunched and not making eye contact with the store clerk in case he found himself subjected to judgement — or worse, conversation.

[smittenroses]

— Broken Parts

Carrd | Ko-fi | Patreon | Archive of Our Own Mirror

Fandom No Straight Roads Pairing 1010/reader Chapter Summary The boys have landed themselves in a situation again, and with their situation comes a new addition.

Masterlist | Next Chapter »

Rin knew he wasn’t special, he was a robot that was made to be easily replaceable; his mind was able to travel between bodies, different systems — it was in his nature to be able to overcome and adapt the many scenarios he would have to face, but, this little robot that had been cleaning their home was now laying at his feet, broken.

This robot couldn’t be as quickly replaced as they did.

It was made to be sturdy, it had been made to last a long time, but, as it laid there in a mess of parts from where their bodies had collided with the machine, Rin couldn’t help but give it a nudge with the tip of his foot, watching the lights of the machine slowly blink away, almost as if trying to get out a message before it finally would die.

“I didn’t break it.” Haym was the first to speak, yellow eyes shifting between the different brothers as he stood there, the tablet that he had been crying over moments before clutched to his chest, the sleeves of his shirt hung over his hands. “I swear I didn’t break it, I didn’t move from the couch by choice.” The couch was currently flipped, an effort made by Eloni to keep himself upright when his prank had gone off, causing the couch to jump from his position.

“I didn’t break it either.” Purl-hew was the next to speak as he stayed as far back as he could, though he wasn’t able to hide the panic in his eyes at the scene, Rin being able to see the way his eyes glitched behind the glasses, either knowing he broke the machine or he had sustained damage to his visuals. “I think Zimelu broke it.”

“The fuck?” Zimelu started, the red one throwing his arms up in the air as he spoke, “I didn’t break anything, I was just proving you wrong that you’re not the one they like the most.”

Rin knew the truth behind it but he kept his mouth shut, letting the silver eyes of his flicker over to Eloni, watching as he held the oversized party popper in his arms; a prank that the two of them had been planning for show on an upcoming live, it seemed that Eloni’s effort had gone to waste, instead, it now painted the crime scene in streamers and what Rin could assume was the washable ink that children would use in their art.

“Well, I didn’t break it either.” Rin tossed the script he had been rehearsing onto the glass coffee table that stood next to the robot, the only thing that hadn’t been upturned in that wasn’t bolted to the floor or the wall. It didn’t resemble much of the clear substance it was made of more than a party table cloth one would use at a children’s birthday party, but, as he crouched down to the robot again, he could see that there was still some battery left.

He watched the warning flash on the screen in multiple languages, the wheels of the robot spinning wildly in an attempt to try and upright itself despite the odd angle the wheels were bent at, knowing that the smell of burning rubber would be incredibly hard to miss to the human nose.

“We should bury it,” Zimelu said, picking up the cleaner robot easily, the strength that they had built into their skeletons coming in handy as he held the bot like it was nothing, listening to the inner mechanisms try and work themselves out. “Hide this from the big J, he can’t get upset if he can’t find it, yeah?”

“It wouldn’t be a bad idea…” The party popper was gone from his hands as Eloni stood next to Zimelu, picking up the mess of wiring that spilled from the robot’s neck, piling it on top, “He can’t remember them all, right?”

“Until he notices that a robot is missing from a charging station.” Purl-hew’s fingers noticeably clutched the book in his hands as he spoke, barely containing the strength from ripping it in two, “Maintenance days, routine cleaning, he’ll eventually notice.”

“Then we hide the charger too.”

The noises blurred together into one at this point, Rin staring hard at the machine that sat in Zimelu’s arms, watching the warning blink and flicker, watching the robot desperately run a system diagnostic and silently call for help. It was pitful, he was glad that the robot was unable to talk or do anything like they did, fearing that the robot would scream out and sound too human for them to do what they needed to.

A shrill screech filled the room, Zimelu dropping the robot onto the hard wooden floors out of shock, the robot screaming its final cry before the screen finally went flat, laying limp in a sea of bright colours and several colourful bodies. Rin heard them long before they came, his head tilting towards the doorway to watch as their creator and their ‘father’ rounded himself into the room, a sword high in his hand.

One would question where he got the sword, but, when there was a sword around the corner every step you took just for decoration, you knew where it came from long before you could guess where he got it from. “What was that?!” Neon J shouted in alarm, the screen beeping with alarm as he attempted to locate the sound of what had screamed.

The sword was lowered as the boys stepped away from the body, revealing the cold metal to their creator. If he still had his face, Rin could imagine that it would be twisted in annoyance, the screen turning off for a moment before walking off slowly, a familiar white and pink face peeking around the corner soon after.

“What was that about not needing human staff?” Eve tsked to the cyborg, leaving the robot boys to stand in the middle of their mess.

Rin picked up the script again, leaving the room.

Rin had rarely found himself interested in others outside of their social circle, however, when a new face showed up at his home, he couldn’t help but be taken aback. Neon J rarely brought in help from the outside, even rarer that they would be within the home. Rin had listened to the ramblings of Neon J before about his paranoia that someone would come and steal things or even steal their blueprints to make knockoffs, but, Rin had never really thought on it too much until now.

With the uniform and the cleaning supplies they lugged around everywhere, he knew this had to be the replacement for the robot that now sat at the bottom of the bin, but, it felt weird knowing that there was a living human in the mansion’s walls that wasn’t one of the other stars.

Even weirder still, she didn’t seem to react too ‘fannish’ around them. As a robot built to entertain and bring joy to people, Rin was used to people looking directly at him whenever he passed by, always reacting in a very similar manner no matter who it was, but, every time he passed this maid, this lady, he noted how she never batted an eye unless she was spoken to. It hadn’t taken long for his brothers to follow in his footsteps in their confusion, Rin able to see how each tried to gain knowledge on who the favourite may be by being around her.

She didn’t react besides the pleasantries.

“Do you think she’s a robot too?” Haym whispered, the group of ‘brothers’ hiding around the corner from where the maid currently worked, watching as she polished silverware, sitting at the big dining table that only served as decoration more than practicality. It had been a question Rin had asked already, but, watching Haym’s eyes turn briefly red before returning to their usual yellow, he watched his shoulders fall.

The maid had a heat signature, she was human.

“Maybe she’s a super spy who’s been sent by another government to steal us?”

“Eloni, that’s the stupidest thing I have heard you say.” Zimelu’s answer was to the point as he leaned against the wall next to Purl-hew, Rin turning his head just enough to watch as his brother flicked through something on his phone with the help of the synthetic skin on his fingertips.

They said they were tagging along to make sure the other three weren’t getting in trouble, but Rin knew they were just as curious about the human woman.

“It could be likely…” Rin said, peeking his head around the corner again, watching as the human put down another spoon, the small pile of silver growing, “But she’s also good at what she does.”

The silence was deafening, too much so, but, as Rin saw something begin to descend from the ceiling in the middle of his vision, he crossed his eyes and watched as a spider slowly crawled down, and down, flicking his vision between Haym who was crouched below and the spider, reaching out his hand to grab at the web string that connected it above. Watching with horror as the spider dropped the string, it landed on Haym’s hand as it reached up to adjust some of the fake hair on his head.

The fallout was instant, Haym attempting to get away from the spider as fast as he could — too bad he didn’t realise he went backwards, crashing into Rin’s body as he went. Crashing, banging, errors flashing across Rin’s screen, it all happened so quickly and everything was just too loud for him to hear the rushed footsteps over to the doorway, seeing the maid staring down at them with such alarm.

He knew one of his hands disconnected, that was for sure, but, as he sat up, he took note of the pressure in his lap and looked down. Haym’s head stared up at him, disconnected from the rest of his body.

“Oh goodness!” The woman said, her hand coming up to her mouth as she took in the full extent of the chaos, “Are you ok? Do you feel pain?” It seemed that Neon J hadn’t briefed her on how they worked based on the reactions, Rin still attempted to clear his system of the errors as he listened to the maid, remaining seated on the floor as he ran a system diagnostic to check for anything else missing.

“We just fell for you, sweetheart.” Rin’s programming took control, feeling the control he had slip for a moment as it took over, spitting out the line that he had been pre-programmed to say in case of collisions on the stage, his brothers saying similar things that even Rin couldn’t help but cringe at, their voices as flat as the line was.

Yet she didn’t react to it, instead choosing to kneel by Haym’s body, hands hovering over it, almost unsure of what to do.

“Having trouble touching perfection?” Haym said. Rin knew he was crying on the inside knowing that he hated that line in particular, but, as her gaze focused on the disembodied head on Rin’s lap, the flirting, the programmed lines, they came to a halt at what was said.

“Do… Do I have permission to touch you?”

Rin had never heard it before. Fans had a habit of taking, and taking, and taking, never giving anything back in return despite everything that they did for them. He was used to just being the machine that entertained people, that was just there to be… a machine.

Never before had he been asked this, never before had his system gone as quiet as it did, leaving Rin’s conscious mind floating in a void.

“That…” Rin knew that if he were alive like he had thought about many times before, he would have a dry mouth, but, processing his words carefully, he nodded slowly, “That would be great.”

The maid’s hands worked with instruction, Haym finding his own words as he instructed her what to do, Rin holding his brother’s head upright with the hand that was still attached, watching as the woman asked questions, made sure they were comfortable with each movement, with each touch she gave to the parts that had been flung across the hall.

It made Rin’s system question the feeling that warmed his circuits as she finally got to him, her hand gripped his disconnected hand, holding back the feeling of wanting to squeeze it back as he felt his system pair it back to his body, fingers twitching as the warmth left his palm.

He was the ‘selfish’ one for attention on stage, but, he wished he was able to feel that warmth a little longer.

[blindmagdalena]

What do you think Homelander’s attraction to Becca was? It’s not like at the Christmas party she was the only woman there, and by that point he had no idea who Butcher was. The actress that plays her is attractive, but the later scenes (season two and even just their initial introduction) between them suggest there’s something more to his attraction.

It’s obvious in the season two scenes that Homelander and Becca have, he has some lingering attraction. I think that’s primarily led by the fact that they have a son together and Homelander desperately wants a family, and also that Homelander is looking for a new woman to attach himself onto since Madelyn died. Perhaps he just wants what he can’t have especially knowing that she’s still in love with Butcher and he wants someone to love him that unconditionally. The main reason I thought of this is because in my opinion, Homelander isn’t the type of character to do something without a reason. Usually he has one even if it’s not a good reason.

ah yes, potentially one of the most contentious/controversial plot points in the fandom. canon gives us VERY little to go on here, so excuse me while I just ramble my take on the whole situation. i extrapolate a good amount. everyone you ask is going to have a different answer, and each one is as valid as any other. this is simply mine!

Homelander's greatest sin isn't wrath or pride. It's envy. He is a bottomless well of yearning for what he doesn't have, and he is viciously covetous. We see this play out most plainly in his one sided beef with a literal baby.

When he meets Becca, she's beautiful, quick witted, strong willed and independent. A career woman. Not only that, she's helping manage his career by handing his social media, which is part of his public perception. Very important to him! He already has a ton of wires crossed when it comes to the women in his life acting as both coworkers/Vought employees and emotional surrogates, i.e. Maeve, Madelyn and Vogelbaum. Plus who knows how many nanny mommies.

At this point, we don't know how long he's been with Maeve, but we have at least another 6 years before the pair breaks up. He's enjoying Maeve, but he wants more. He always wants more. Maybe he wants a wife, and she's refusing him that.

But Becca is a wife. He sees that ring on her finger and it boils his blood that he doesn't have that classic, romantic symbol of commitment. Of love. Worse yet when he meets her husband! The figurative boogeyman. The baby stealing his mommy and her milk. We're not there in the story yet, but we do see a trend here. It likely didn't start here: imagine what it was like for him to find out Vogelbaum had kids. Kids he loved. I bet that gutted Homelander. It should have been him.

Homelander, in his mind, can never win. Can never have enough. Anyone else having means they are directly taking away what should be his. It could be that it was never really about Becca specifically so much as the archetype she represented.

That carries us into season 2 where Becca takes on an additional archetype that Homelander is now lacking: mother. I think you're right on the money that a good amount of his attraction comes from the fact she's the mother of his son.

He falls pretty deep down the fantasy family rabbit hole with Becca, though. He not only inserts himself into their lives and routine, he takes a renewed interest in Becca. He snoops through her things, smells her clothes, and engages with her well beyond just interacting with Ryan. Then comes the scene where he finds her hidden stash of Billy merch, and the fantasy is shattered. She's still in love with another man. She's a wife, but she's not his wife. She's the mother to his son, but she's not someone who will fulfill those emotional needs for him. I've made this comparison before, but it's very reminiscent to the breakdown he has when he sees his baby blanket in his fake childhood home. He moves on VERY easily to Stormfront when she not only presents herself as a mother to her own child, but a potential mother for his child.

I'm backtracking a little here, but when Maeve called Homelander over from Billy and Becca at the party, I always got the vibe she was doing so quite purposefully. I wonder how much of their early relationship was Maeve feeling like she was performing damage control. Managing him, curbing his destructive behaviors. Did she see that covetous edge in his eye when he would look at Becca, at her ring? Did she try to tell him to leave her alone, play it like a joke?

We have the deleted scene where Maeve says the reason they broke up was because he couldn't keep it in his tights, but we don't really have any other explicit instances or even mentions of Homelander liberally sleeping around. Did she know about Becca, or at the very least did she make an educated guess when the woman disappeared? Maybe she felt like he did it to spite her. Did she know about Madelyn?

Ultimately we know Maeve becomes complicit in his crimes. She feels her hands are dirty with the same blood. She becomes jaded, she's no longer the hero. She's just an accessory. I definitely don't think it started that way, though.

anyways, I hope this somewhat answered your question! I have a tendency to jump around a lot and word vomit, but this generally covers my take on why that all went down the way it did.

Honestly, I would love to write a fic someday that digs more into my thoughts here. Becca deserves so much more than what she got from the narrative.

[thatchickwithtoomanyhobbies]

Leap of Faith (Aiello x Reader)

***You mooks wanted it, and I decided I’d do it for the fandom- Character x Reader stories. I do this very reluctantly, with Aiello being my first victim. Aiello has been in love with his female best friend (that’s you) for years, and has an inkling she feels the same. In an emotional moment while at home between Kasserine and Europe, he takes a leap of faith with the girl of his dreams. Also you are catholic in this story for plot purposes. Don’t worry if you’re not, neither am I. The story just works better that way.***

They were walking together to the ice cream shop on the corner, the way they’d done since they were kids every Friday afternoon. With him getting his double scoop of coffee and her with her plain vanilla- something he always teased her for. Usually about her being boring, which to him she could never be.

This time felt different, however. It was the last time he’d see her again for a while, as he was being shipped off into the war effort yet again.

She was quieter than usual today, which usually meant something was on her mind. He always knew when something was going on with her, she was his best friend after all. Although he’d be lying if he said he didn’t wish they could be more.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

(Y/N)(L/N)- Frank Aiello’s best friend since they were seven years old in Catholic school. She’d fallen down on the playground and he, the gentleman he was, picked her up and took her to the nuns to get patched up. They’d been inseparable ever since.

As they grew up, they did everything together. From their Friday ice cream outings (she refused to let him call them dates) to her attending all his baseball games, to hot-wiring her father’s car in high school for a joyride.

It was sometime after she got her first boyfriend when they were sixteen that he noticed the first inklings of stronger emotions bubbling to the surface. Whenever she’d bring her beau around, he’d be filled with seething jealousy. Although he’d certainly never tell her that. He didn’t want to ruin his friendship with her, so he buried the feelings under baseball and drumming- places two and three on the list of things he liked most about life.

He could deny them no longer when they boy she’d been seeing dumped her for another girl. She’s gone to his house sobbing and, being the friend he was, he held her in his arms as she cried, trying his best not to cry himself. He’d always hated seeing her upset.

It was then he knew. He was so hopelessly and madly in love with the girl crying in his arms. So much so it took every ounce of willpower not to kiss her there and then. This wasn’t the time. He was selfishly glad that that chucklehead had screwed up this bad. Maybe now she’d realize that she should be with him instead of that jerk. Unfortunately for him, she never did seem to realize just how deep his feelings for her went. At least not then.

When he was shipped off to Kasserine, she’d written him a letter every week. Telling him the most random bits of her everyday life while he was gone. He always wrote her back- hoping, praying, that maybe absence would make the heart grow fonder, and that maybe she’d finally give him a chance to love her right.

Eventually, her letters started started to revolve more around his absence rather than her own life. How much she missed him, how she couldn’t wait for him to be home, how she missed their ice cream dates. His heart had skipped a beat on the last one. She called it a date. Could it be? Could she finally be starting to feel the same feelings he had been feeling for so long?

He was back home for a brief furlough. He was being shipped off again in a couple of days, either to the Pacific or to Europe. He’d decided to spend it with her, not knowing if he’d ever see her in the flesh again, or if their next meeting would be at heaven’s gates after she’d lived a long life with some other man. Frank hated that thought. He wanted to be the one she spent her life with.

The night prior he’d decided to talk to Nonna about it. Nonna always had good advice for everyone about every subject on God’s green earth, so he figured maybe she’d have some for him too. What did he do with the all the love he had for this girl? Did he let her go and let her be happy with some other guy? Or did he pour his heart out to her and risk ruining their friendship for good?

He said as much to Nonna, who in response whacked him upside the head with her stirring spoon.

“How did I end up with such a stupid boy for a grandson? Are you blind, Francis?” She had yelled at him, whipping her spoon wildly through the air and getting her homemade vodka sauce on everything. He cringed at her usage if his first name. He much preferred to go by Frank, or as (Y/N) called him, Frankie.

“No, Nonna. Just confused.” He responded rubbing his head. “And concussed,” he thought to himself. She didn’t need to hit him to get her point across.

“Frankie, if you haven’t noticed by now, then you’re hopeless! Have you seen the way she looks at you? Have you seen the way she smiles when she’s with you? The way she acts around you? That girl is in love with you and you’re too blind and stupid to see it!” She yelled at him, pointing at him with the spoon and dripping more sauce on the floor and her grandson.

“Nonna, she doesn’t think of me that way. That’s my problem,” he said leaning against the kitchen counter.

“Oh mio Dio! Aiuta questo povero, stupido ragazzo!” Nonna yelled before taking another swing at the man with the sauce-covered spoon. This time he managed to duck out of the way. Why did this crazy lady keep trying to hit him?

“Frankie, Saint Valentine himself couldn’t put together a better match for you than (y/n). Tell her, before it’s too late. Take a leap of faith, Francis. She may surprise you.” Was that all? That wouldn’t help him anymore than another whack with the spoon. “And take a bath before you go. You are covered in sauce.”

“Yeah. No thanks to you, Nonna,” he thought. Could she be right? Did he have a chance? Could she possibly feel the same way about him? He’d have to think about that while he washed the sauce out of his hair.

When he finally got out of the bath and returned to his room, he found that Nonna had left a small box along with a note on his pillow.

“Take the leap” was all the note said, and inside the box was her own engagement ring. The one his grandfather had given her nearly 60 years before. Was she serious? He couldn’t just propose to her out of the blue like this! He’d scare her off for sure. But if Nonna was sure….

He was taking her out on one of their ice cream dates tomorrow. May God and Saint Valentine help him. He was probably out of his mind for doing this. But if it went well, it would all be worth it.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

“What’s wrong, (n/n)?” He asked her, stopping abruptly in the middle of the sidewalk and turning to face her. She looked ready to burst into tears, from what he couldn’t imagine.

“Nothing. I’m fine,” came the abrupt reply. Yep. Something was wrong, and her response said she didn’t want to talk about it.

“I know you better than that. What’s wrong? You know can tell me anything,” he pressed, brushing a rogue lock of (h/c) hair away from her forehead.

“Just lay off, Frank! I’m fine! Just stop!” She yelled at him, batting his hands away. She’d never yelled at him like that before in all the years he’d known her. Not even when his mischievous schemes got them both into trouble. Something was eating at her.

“No you’re not,” he said, grabbing her by the hand and pulling her back in the direction of his house. “We’re not going anywhere until you tell me what on earth is going on.”

She remained quiet as he dragged her back down the block to his house. He turned to look at her before unlocking his front door. Were those tears in her (e/c) eyes? What could possibly be causing her this much emotional turmoil?

What if…? No. It couldn’t be. She’d been fine when he left for basic before Kasserine. She’d given him a hug and sent him on his way with a promise to write to him as often as she could. She hadn’t even shown up to the train station to say goodbye. But what if?

“What is wrong? Please! Tell me what’s wrong, (y/n)! You’re scaring me!” He told her, closing the door behind them and grabbing her by the shoulders. She looked around the room, looking anywhere but his eyes, her hands shoved into her coat pockets. She was beginning to break, a few tears slipping down her cheeks.

“Please. Just tell me what’s wrong. Please, (n/n). I can’t help you unless you tell me what’s wrong.” He could hear the tears in his own voice as he spoke. Damn it! If there was one person who could make him cry, it was (Y/N). She’d never done this. She always told him everything no matter how difficult it was. What was so wrong that she was refusing to tell him this? What if…?

He shook the thought out of his head. This wasn’t the time to be thinking of his own feelings. He pulled her over to the couch and sat down, pulling her down with him.

“Please, just talk to me, (n/n). You’re scaring me,” he told her again, pulling her head to his chest and wrapping his arms around her. It wasn’t lost on him that this was the same position they were in when he first realized how deep his feelings for her went. She was crying into his chest now, and he could feel a few of his own tears beginning to slip over. What if?

He couldn’t. Could he? Was it worth the risk? What was the harm? What if that’s what it’s all been leading to? What if? What if that’s what was bothering her? What if? What if this was the moment for that leap of faith Nonna had told him to take? He took a deep breath, trying to stop his own silent tears. Leap of faith…

“You know I love you, (y/n). I know you do. And I think you love me too. And I think you don’t want me to leave without knowing, but you’re too afraid to say it out loud.”

His feelings were out in the open now, and there was no taking it back. He stroked her hair, hoping and praying that she’d be receptive. If she wasn’t, he’d respect it. It would hurt, but he’d let her go if that’s what she wanted. This girl he knew everything about, he’d love to be the one by her side through all of life’s trials and celebrations.

He rested his head on hers, still softly crying. He rubbed circles on her back, each one speaking a silent ‘I love you.’ Was she holding onto him even tighter now? He held her closer to him, whispering his love into the top of her head, praying that it would sink in. That maybe she’d realize he meant every word. That maybe she’d share his feelings. That maybe they’d have a future together after this cruel war was over. Suddenly he heard her muffled voice in his arms:

“I love you, too.”

Finally. The words he had longed to hear for so many years had escaped her lips. He could cry from the joy he felt in this moment. He would do anything for this girl. He’d swim across the ocean if she wanted him to, she need only speak the word.

Should he? Did he dare? They loved each other already. And they already knew everything there was to know about the other. There was nothing that could be discovered in a courtship that he didn’t already know about her. Would she give him the answer he longed to hear? Leap of faith…

He pulled the ring box out of his pocket. He didn’t know how to ask her. He was risking everything with this one move.

“Wait for me,” he told her, presenting her with the jewelry. “Wait for me, and when I get home we’ll go to the priest and have him marry us. We can have a life together.”

His answer was given to him in the form of a passionate kiss. Fireworks went off in his head as the moment he’d imagined for so long played out better than in his daydreams.

His girl in his arms, a ring on her finger, a future full of promise to come home to. The one leap of faith had paid off.

***And today you mooks learned that yours truly is not only angsty, but is also a hopeless romantic (emphasis on the hopeless). I hope you people that wanted this like how it turned out. And let me know if you want more like this.***

[t1meslayer]

T1meslayer Wrapped ~2024~

2024 was a bit of a rollercoaster year in my personal life, but in terms of creative writing it was a vibrant one!

Two of the zines I've participated in published their physical copies: poképocket (@pokepocketzine) and Homemade in Hyrule. Four additional fandom zines are also at different stages of active development, so there's no shortage of "big projects" on the way.

However, I still managed to slip in time for my own independent pieces — perhaps too much time, in some cases. There was a lot of feverish writing for ideas lodged in my head at the cost of whatever other video games or TV shows or drawings I wanted to do, in just the right way to trigger my terminal sense of opportunity cost.

But that being said, I am drawing more actively! Isn't that fun? I've even begun incorporating a few of those sketches into my fics, as was the case with "Peanut Butter & Jelly" and "Live Wire."

Overall I published-

22 fanfics

-to Archive of our Own throughout 2024. That's not to mention the chapter count for stories with multiple parts — except in that one edge case with "Stone-Cold Lovers," wherein I merely published the final chapter of a revived story from years prior. But yeah... Edge case.

When I dropped the first part of my long-form Pokemon Scarlet and Violet story "Fallout" in May 2024, I heralded it as my special 30th Archive of our Own fic (to not get muddled counting the handful of pieces still exclusive to FanFiction.net). Yet, when I published my final story "Live Wire" for Mariver Week on December 21, the total count read-

45 Works

Here's how the backend statistics shook out for last year, as captured on Monday, January 6, 2025:

To celebrate the end of a wonderful year, I thought it would be fun to give y'all a "Top 5 T1meslayer Fics You Should Read (or Re-Read)" list. Because hey... Who doesn't love a numbered list?

I decided not to count any stories attached to zines or similar projects (sorry Pokemon Holiday Exchange 2024), and I'm going to mostly avoid sharing unfinished multi-parters. As much as I love "Drowning," it feels bad to recommend it when I'm still dragging my feet on the second half.

That all being said, click on to see the list :)

=====

1) Scrambled Eggs

If you've ever read a T1meslayer fic, this is undoubtedly the one you've read. It's far and away my most popular story yet, garnering over 3,000 views and 300 Kudos. I originally write it to have a piece for applying to a certain @dunmeshizine, but it is also the first breakthrough of creativity for a series that well and truly changed my life for the better.

Seriously, I love Dungeon Meshi so much. You can't read this fic if you're anime-only because it does have endgame spoilers, but I hope you enjoy the hell out of it if you can! My "waking up at three separate times" opening drove the initial idea, but I feel it spread its wings so much further by the end, thanks in-part to good use of food-based puns and descriptors.

=====

2) By Moonlight

Most of my Splatoon 3 output rests upon the mighty shoulders of Shiver, the character who really rotted my brain away... Mostly because of how much I love them together with Marie. However, I do love other pairings too! The first part of "All's Fair in Love and Grand Fest" is all about Callie and Acht, for example, and "By Moonlight" here is inspired by Pearl and Marina.

Despite playing a lot of Splat2 with my friends, it wasn't until I really listened to Off the Hook music like Candy-Coated Rocks that I realized just how much I missed. So, with the Side Order DLC coming out, it seemed like an appropriate time to finally break out an Off the Hook fic! This one does a lot of fun formatting for elements like music awards, as well as cool visual storytelling inspired by discussions with my sister about music and emotional writing. Absolutely one of my more stylish fics.

=====

3) Neurocysticercosis

As previously mentioned, I have a lot of friends who are obsessed with specifically Gojo and Geto's relationship in JJK. So... That's pretty easy to milk when I want to write some birthday fics for the good peeps.

Where "Neurocysticercosis" stands apart from my prior GojoGeto fic "Infinitesimal Distance" is in all the ways my background research informed themes throughout. I found a new artist I really like while trying to dig up era-appropriate subjects for Japanese museum galleries, and it's amazing what you can get out of a character with some well-placed visual similarities! Plus... I may have done Shoko a little dirty... But her entrance into this story is one of the funnier things I wrote all year.

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4) How You Get The Girl

If you didn't discover my work through "Scrambled Eggs," you may have instead found me via "How You Get The Girl" — somehow my most popular Stardew "Sapphic Valley" piece despite being, like, the fifth one. It's the first in that series which isn't purely about introducing the cast, instead delving more into the relationship between my character Alex and Haley, and I think that narrow focus did the story a huge favor.

The centerpiece of "How You Get The Girl," in my humble opinion, is the long description of clutter in Haley and Emily's house. All of the individual elements are fun to sift through, but more importantly, it says a lot given just whom those elements belong to. One of the better bits of subtle characterization I feel I've done in the fanfiction space.

=====

5) Fallout

Okay. I know I said no unfinished multi-part fics.

"Fallout" is a bit of an exception to the rule.

If you want something standalone, my Halloween story "Obsidian" is probably your best bet — and it introduces Steven Stone's rock club, so it's a good best bet to have. However, "Fallout" holds a very special place in my heart for the insanely long buildup and all of the auxiliary multimedia elements I've been putting together for it.

Elements I still can't show yet because I hold true to my desire for fun surprises. But trust me when I say there's good stuff here.

I intend to return to this very soon (if other unfinished pieces don't monopolize my time first), but I feel less bad about recommending it over others considering it's the tip of the spear for an even longer-running series of Pokemon Scarlet and Violet fics that weave one huge narrative. There's plenty to read for any hungry fans... And if you just want the quick summary, I made a flowchart infographic for that too!

=====

In 2025, I want to try and be better about discussing my fics for longer than the shelf life they get through my Fanfiction Debrief posts (another thing I'm woefully behind on).

However, I do also think 2025 is going to be a year of subtractions. As of this writing, I've decided it's probably time to retire FFN as a posting hub. As much as I love making Featured Images for that platform, I can still make my cover arts without having to balance all the extra work with no response beyond a billion bots asking to do commissions based on my fics. It's also probably time to shutter the ol' Twitter page in favor of something like Bluesky, as much as I loath the idea of creating more social media accounts.

Bigger standalone posts should be on the way for those subjects.

But finally, I think it would be best to wrap this sucker up by thanking not just my lovely audience, but also the great friends I've begun fostering throughout this last year of creative writing!

There's a half-dozen people from various projects and Tumblr cat boopings and AO3 comment threads I could mention here, but @alchemicallymoon, @duelbraids, and @outsideexistentlines are the three I talk to nearly every day in some capacity or another. I really couldn't imagine this particular phase of my life without them, cheesy as it might sound.

Seriously, I cannot thank everyone out there enough for your support these last couple of years. Hoping to have even more stuff to share as soon as I'm no longer exhausted by the process of moving to a new state!

[inklingofadream]

Ink's 2023 Fic

It’s the end of another year, and you know what that means! Or you joined me this year and don’t, one of the two. At the end of every year I post a list of everything I wrote to become my blog’s pinned post for the upcoming year. However, this year, it’s a bit different. We’ll get to that in a minute.

According to my AO3 stats, I posted 709,908 words of fic in 2023, across 8 fandoms and spread over 64 individual works. That’s a 765.784% increase in word count from last year! I’m unwell!

Normally, I post everything I wrote, split up by fandom and in chronological order, with basic stats and descriptions that vary between synopsis, liner notes, excerpts, or all of the above. However, 45 of those 64 works were written for Whumptober this year. Since they’re mostly for The Magnus Archives (dominating the list as usual) and many of them are very short, I’m not going to list all the TMA fics. I’ll list my favorites and ones I think got less attention than they deserved, as well as all fics for other fandoms, and since that’s my most popular stuff I’m listing it last/under the cut. Wordcount and relationships (romantic or platonic, healthy or not) are listed, but check the AO3 tags, warnings, and notes, as I won’t be including the content warnings here.

Batman

Mom’s Been On a Parenting Kick Lately- 9k, WIP, Talia/Bruce, Talia & Batkids;This is still getting off the ground (I need to get back to it), but I’m excited about the future of this fic! It’s my take on Jason’s post-resurrection time with the League of Assassins, but with timelines turned into spaghetti to facilitate bonding. Talia is currently in possession of 3 batkids, but she isn’t done stealing Bruce’s kids yet :)

i'd walk a wire, jump through a fire for you- 800, complete; literally just just shy of 1k about Dick have feelings about falling and parents

The Locked Tomb

lyin’ on our backs and countin’ the stars- 900, complete, John&Gideon; I’m actually shocked there aren’t way more John and Gideon “bonding” fics out there. This one also has a backstory for Gideon and Ianthe’s friendship bracelets!

The Adventure Zone- Balance

old worn out suit and shoes- 600, complete, Taako&Lup; Post-finale nightmares for Taako, now that he can remember he has a sister to lose

Malevolent

Please Come Back To Me- 2.9k, complete, Parker&Arthur; Parker lives and goes to hunt down and kill whatever used Arthur to try to kill him.

You’re here. That’s all I need to know.- 300 complete; Arthur finds Faroe in the bath.

Living, Dead, or Undecided?- 1.7k, complete; Arthur is sacrificed to the King in Yellow as punishment for what happened to Faroe.

His head and limbs were heavy with ornaments, much of his flesh left unprotected from the elements. It was far too mild a summer evening for that; he deserved to freeze or burn at the freedom of open air. His thoughts were fuzzy with the overpowering cacophony of scented oils and chanting. He was deposited at the top of the hill, too gentle in slope to burn at his atrophied muscles, on a stone slab. They chained him in place, the seeping stone finally sapping enough warmth from his bones to feel appropriate.

Dracula

i still see your ghost- 200, complete, Jonathan/Mina; Some fill-in angst about Jonathan seeing Dracula on September 22… which I did actually write on September 22.

Hannibal

I can’t remember if I cried- 1.7k, complete, Abigail/Marissa; This is actually a concept I came up with in high school lol. Hopefully, someday I’ll write a fic expanding on the shipping kernel of the concept.

Hench

The Kind of World Where We Belong- 1k, complete, Anna/Quantum; AU where Leviathan dies and femslash ensues.

The Magnus Archives

The Vampire Saga- 68k, 6 works, Jon/Martin; The first of several shared universes with @suttttton on this list. Vampire!Elias snacks on Jon until Vampire!Martin gets hold of him instead, fluff and romance ensue. The new works this year both feature Gerry!

The Vampire Saga Route 2- 38k, 7 works, Jon/Martin, Jon/Elias, Jon/suffering; Shares a few fics with its predecessor, up to Martin entering the picture, this is the darker version. Fic this year mostly focuses on Jon meeting Tim and Sasha, and the gang rescuing Danny from the Circus. And the aftermath thereof. I’m really proud of the Circus stuff I wrote!

Bird-Verse- 37k, 7 works, Jon/Beholding, Jon/Martin;Spin-off of cult au, also with Sutton, featuring a happier resolution to many of Jon’s problems, so he gets to live with all his friends and marry Martin. Except for how this year’s additions are about him dealing with the lingering cult intrusions and trauma :)

Indent AU- 50k, 2 works, Jon/everyone;My first foray into writing smut. I’m very proud of it, and I’d say it deserved more love than it got, but I’m realistic about the content being very much not for everyone.

Cult AU Bad Ending- 9k, 2 works, Jon/Beholding, Jon/Jonah; This is a good time to mention that, as I have 10,000 Cult AU derivatives, they have their own AO3 Collection now. This one is a far future fic where Jon is immortal with Jonah and sad about it. It’s a crier.

Interesting- 3.7k, complete, Jon/Elias, Jon/Martin; This is an old fic of Jon and Elias in the Panopticon that got a new chapter for Whumptober! It took about 2 years to get that draft to publication…

restless soul who always skips town- 900, complete, Jon/Peter; This is the one I most wish got more attention. Peter keeps Jon in the Lonely.

When Peter comes, it's wonderful. Peter is a person in a way the Archivist isn't and, he knows, Peter even sometimes leaves the fog. He knows it because Peter gives him journals that are red and gold and violet, so different from the limited palette of the fog and the Archivist and Peter that they make the Archivist's eyes hurt.

dead if they knew- 6k, complete, Elias/Jon/Tim; I had SO much fun fiddling to differentiate the four POVs from each other!

Familiar AU- 16k, 4 works, complete; Jon is kidnapped by Elias and turned into his familiar; for Sasha, Tim, and Martin, it’s a long, hard road to rescuing him.

no beat, no melody- 600, complete; Canon-compliant fic in between Jon getting the tape of the birthday party from MAG161 and the episode itself, hanging around the safehouse in the Depression Zone.

welcomed you with open doors- 1.6k, complete, Martin/Jon; Spiral!Martin in a role reversal au that swaps him and Michael. Martin is much more proactive as the Distortion (and more liable to fall in love with nearby Archivists)

save some face (you know you’ve only got one)- 1.4k, complete; Sasha is altered by the NotThem instead of killed. Half body horror, half giving her my fibromyalgia, all bad times!

somebody once broke me- 2.7k, complete, Jon&Gerry; Gerry lives! Visibly monstery Avatars! Jon gets kidnapped from a kidnapping! It’s all the hits for my body of work ;)

remember this moment- 3.8k, complete, Jon&Daisy; I initially planned this fic for, I think, Februwhump 2021. It’s been slated for every Februwhump and Whumptober since, and FINALLY finished!

Take Me Through the Darkness- 15k, complete; Superhero AU, ft. epistolary interludes! Several more of my greatest hits! (And also Jon getting kidnapped from another kidnapping.) My personal favorite is Jon thinking Tim is a hallucination and crying.

look upon your greatness (and she’ll send the call out)- 8k, complete; Cult AU AU where Georgie tracks Jon down a few months after his kidnapping.

The chances of Jon being abducted, held somewhere, and still alive are so narrow that they might as well not exist. Checking the resources the charity sent, Georgie realized it's even grimmer than that. She struggles to picture Jon doing anything to appease his captors. It's extremely easy, however, to picture him literally or figuratively daring them to kill him.

Something Wretched About This- 2.9k, complete, Jon&Tim; Jon returns from the Circus without vocal cords, and he and Tim have a moment of peace, if not reconciliation.

just like a real-life thelma and louise- 6.6k, complete, Sasha/Annabelle; Sasha and Annabelle have superpowers and escape from the lab experimenting on them.

Kinky Polychives AU- 70k, 2 works, WIP, Polychives; My second, much fluffier smut verse. I tagged Jon as “horny for predicaments instead of people” and I think it’s the thing that’s been commented on specifically by the most people lol

til the veins run red and blue- 200, complete, Jon/Martin; I really like the Lonely, and I don’t know why I don’t write it more. This one is a little Somewhere Else coda with Jmart

come home (to my heart)- 8.7k, complete, Jon&Gerry; a fusion of Little Archive and cult au where Jon is the specialest boy in the whole Cult of Beholding, and Gerry grew up with Mary. If anything I wrote this year gets a sequel, I think it’s this. The fic is all Gerry POV, but I had a chunk written in Jon POV I cut, ft. Jon convincing Beholding that he can definitely wander London solo and it’s FINE, he won’t disappear in the house of a murderer or anything… ;)

Extras- 18k, Jon/Martin; My fae au is complete, but this is a bunch of little bits that inspired me beyond the bounds of the main story, like meeting Melanie, Martin proposing, and so on.

sitting pretty on the throne, nothing more i want (except to be alone)- 217k, WIP, Jon/Beholding; Cult au wraps up another year! Hopefully, by this time next year, it’ll be complete at LAST!

Beneath the Stains of Time- 98k, WIP; Also a contender for longfic that I hope to finish in 2024! This year, we FINALLY got to the gang figuring out Jon’s identity and now it’s all unraveling…

Little Archive- 85k, WIP; Last but certainly not least! I’ve been so happy to see the warm reception for Cecile and Anika this year 💗

[firebuug]

indirectly not really tagged by(stolen from) @scp-168 because i'm cracyyyy (want to type and ramble)

3 ships:

damian already went off about abc but i need more abel and hokma. you guys talk about old man yaoi but WHEREEEE is the old man x old man yaoi. your coworker aged you 40 years and then he remanifests in his office as a manifestation of his flaws and his trauma and he's old as balls too. tell me you arent all over his ass. also can we have a old woman yuri carmen.

literally all of the ships i've been going crazy over have literally just been oc ships but also i need everyone to know that even if i don't play it anymore gregor x rodya will forever be the bisexual fail ship of all time. they both get no pussy. they beat each other up daily. gregor is used as a headrest and is also boob height. what's more to love? but also gregor and meursault? there's no chemistry here whatsoever other than they were both done dirty by their society and also have a ridiculous height difference. i feel like gregor talks and says shit and meursault takes it too seriosuly or doesnt get it and they both sit in silence for the next 30 mins. i hate them

none of this matters (holds up my oc polycule that consists of a giant centipede a wriggling neurotic mass of wires a giant bird dinosaur beast and the occasional cockroach that needs some love and forces you to like them) (holds up my queerplatonic autistic distortion sex explosion that commits The Pianist 2 and kills thousands and forces you to like them) (holds up my giant centipede kissing the bug from limbus company and forces you to like them) (holds up my bisexual telephone who hates men but wishes the living cymbal piano man and knight butch would kiss her so bad)

First ever ship: ugh i wish i knew, i'm pretty sure it has had to be an oc ship of some kind, but that probably doesn't count since that's just playing with dolls, so my money is on some stupid hetalia shit (i refuse to actually speak the name of the ship but like. it was one of the most popular mlm ships in the fandom so fuckin. guess). although the first ship i actually started making content and reading fic for instead of just looking at pictures of (i have no idea if hetalia came before this or not) is skarso from tos sob

Last song: im currenlty listening to music lel...im listening to Paranoiac Intervals/Body Dysmorphia by of Montreal one of the songs of all time nglll

Last Movie: Probably a movie i watched at my schools entertainment club, which was..across the spiderverse (it was really good but the ending was kinda disappointing)

Currently reading: I need to start reading again but I keep getting distracted by art and the Evil Devices, but I'm working on continuing Villain VS Villain by Rosalind B. Sterling and recently bought Chainsaw Man Buddy Stories and the first book of part 1 that i'm waiting to get brainrot again to read

Currently watching: i need to finish catching up on major adventure time episodes so i can watch fionna and cake and not be confused. also want to finish steven universe sometime...also need to finish watching madoka w my friends....

Currently consuming: also wateh

Currently craving: watermelon (we only have it when im not craving it like a dehydrated man in the desert)

[mainprotagonist]

ok ill bite, tell me about your ocs!

YES PERFECT... IVE GOT MANY!!!! You can see all of them on my toyhouse!!! A lot of them are WIP until I get their basics down but theres a lot of them that have icons so at least you can see what they look like

I do fandom ocs but since these stretch from fandom to fandom i wont go all over them but my Big OCs I talk about the most are Kelsey (one piece oc) or Prince (osomatsu san oc).... and i love oc/canon pairs sooo much and the biggest reason I make fandom ocs.... But look out for me making a dungeon meshi oc bc its def gonna happen.

as for my other ocs, I've currently have uhhh (checks hand) 8 'verses' I talk about which is basically just different worlds with different settings and stories that I jump around with working on.. EXPIER, Danger, OI!, Kingdom, Rampage, Red Wire Burn (RWB), V•RSE and Virus.....

I'll put descriptions in a read more so i dont spam up the dash <:)

EXPIER - newest verse of mine where all the characters are some sort of glee performer, drag performer so on so forth. all based on a very specific emotion and I'll give them playlists for songs that fit them. these guys help connect my love for music and ocs. Story follows the whole cast.

Danger, OI! - My oldest verse that I havent worked on in years and obvs needs overhauling and planning but its about people called animal whisperers who can command demons and free them from having no self control that cause them to attack civilians. Follows main character, Bibion.

Kingdom - A verse I work on with my bff milo most of the time and a lot of it wouldnt be possible without him. A world divided into multiple kingdoms: Astral, Angel, Dragon, Lava, Shadow, Spirit, Glacier, Flora n Fauna, Underdwelling and Reef.... All separated by lands considered neutral territory that many live outside of influence of the rulers. Story focuses on the aftermath of a long running war against the Shadow Kingdom rebelling against the others, which had left them devastated and leaving the rest to start anew to deal with their scars and rebuilding what was lost.

Rampage - Follows a train hopping, nonbinary shapeshifting duo named Fyle and Garrett!! Very casual loose verse I also havent worked on in a bit. They are thieves and pick up jobs that involve petty thievery in order to make ends meet.

Red Wire Burn - Usually abbreviated to RWB. Focuses on a vampire run bar and the entertainer that performs there and is given room and board, Desta who is an introverted magician; loves people but needs a lot of alone time, especially after his performances

Seasons - A family of huldrekalls living and surviving in a group or separated depending on the season. Huge plant motifs as they are tree creatures. They help local farmers with their fields and other tasks plus protecting them. Focuses heavily on Melian; the middle child of the family who catches the attention of a half giant by the name of Rexus (belongs to @not-amh). Lore related is that their names are chosen by their significant other as they are born n found no need for a name. Formerly simply known as Huldrekall until he meets Rexus and is given his name.

V•RSE - second oldest verse and arguably the more developed with almost all the ocs having their profile finished.... Its my fictional fashion industry, queer led and many of the workers are LGBT.... Creating clothes for all shapes and sizes regardless of gender; only separating the genres of clothing by the style and size rather than gender. Focuses a lot on Kåre who is the newest worker and learning the ropes of working at V•RSE

Virus - My lil scifi horror verse... An exploration team is sent to an inhabited planet as a means to research the lands. Jason, the teams head researcher, wakens a long dead alien virus, becoming infected and killing the rest of the crew and turning them into almost unrecognizable monsters; the only way to tell theyre the original crew is because of distinct physical features. A team is sent to rescue them or to find what happened to them.

[yessoupy]

"your top 15 favourite tv shows can say a lot about your personality!"

i've been tagged by @plavoptice and @aimmyarrowshigh and boy are y'all in for a ride. in no particular order:

diagnosis: murder -- first live action non-soap that was appointment television for me. it ran from 1993-2001 on cbs and i've seen every episode. dick van dyke plays a doctor who helps his son (played by his actual son barry) solve crimes.

the simpsons -- my dad loved this show while we were growing up and we watched every episode until i was in high school.

the young and the restless and all my children -- abovementioned soaps. these are the soaps my mom watched. she would record them on the vcr (they ran back to back on different stations) so she could watch them later without commercials. i have been watching shemar moore since i was 7 years old.

survivor -- for DECADES i watched every episode. i was in 8th grade when season 1 aired. the last 4 or so seasons i haven't bothered watching, though. when people who hadn't been alive when the first season aired started being cast i just couldn't. :|

band of brothers -- since i met a couple of the surviving members of easy company in 2004, bob has held a special place in my heart. it took like 14 years for me to latch onto the show in a fandom capacity. between 2004 and 2018 i would most often view it as i napped on the couch while it ran on spike tv or something as a marathon over memorial weekend, the fourth of july, or veterans' day.

grey's anatomy -- watched a bunch of this in college because some girls on my hall freshman year were superfans. <3 please note i began college during season 1.

the walking dead -- i found the first 3 episodes online in fall of 2010 after a friend on livejournal had tagged it as potentially interesting due to the casting of norman reedus. i didn't know who he was. i don't regret starting the show, but i do regret staying on past season 6, even though there were 2 episodes in season 10 that were like ... exquisite.

deadliest catch!!! -- i fly southwest mostly and there's always a couple of episodes available to watch for free. i just ... idk, it's cold and wet and super dangerous and the captains are so fucking catty with each other. i just like it (still).

law and order: svu -- my comfort show. i have probably seen every episode.

pitch -- we got one season, and were robbed.

chicago fire -- while i watched med first, and i'm currently flying through pd, fire is ... well, it's something.

rescue me -- speaking of fire ....

big love -- i've re-watched just once, it might be time for another.

the wire -- my first watch was later than it should have been.

lost -- of course. the first couple of seasons were amazing, and then i learned that the creators didn't have an end in mind and uh... by the end of season 3 that was very, very clear. i still don't understand the finale.

i'm taking the cheap way out and tagging anyone who wants to. please tag me if you choose to complete this!!

[drawnaghht]

re-listening to "Samurai Rabbit with Stan Sakai & The Usagi Chronicles Creative Team"

This week I have been re-listening to one of the longer interviews with Stan Sakai, Khang Le and Candie and Doug Langdale and I found a youtube version of it with official subtitles!! I can finally understand what some of the parts actually were about compared to before x3

Should I post a link to this? or links to others? reblog or comment! you can probably find it yourself if you're curious.

Or would anyone be interested in like, a summary of those interviews?

I've posted links to that and other interviews before, but this is one of the most extensive ones imo, so I thought it would be nice to post the link that here separately.

One thing I see the collective fandom voice out is how they don't like that it's about a young rabbit and not a direct adaptation (it wasn't up to the crew, they were brought on after the decision) and this interview actually gives answer to that and many other questions I've seen fans talk about publicly both on here and on twitter. (Like why there aren't phones or screens for example.) There's a nice intro about this aspect as well, how two fans of the og comic feel about this show when about to interview the author himself and how the main creative leads are also big nerds about the Usagi Yojimbo comicbook series. Stan Sakai and Khang Le mainly talk about the art and adaptation, as well as story of the show, while Candie and Doug talk about the creative writing parts of the show. They even talk about the music a bit! Reccomended listening if you like the show! This was also recorded before the final 10 episodes aired so it's fun hearing them tease the 2nd season again.

What's nice is that the interviewers themselves (the Comicbook Couples Counseling podcast), are fans of Usagi Yojimbo as well so they are very well-versed in the comic series, so the questions they ask are also very relevant... but also respectful to both the creators and the comic and cartoon! So it's a nice interview to listen to, from a very creative and mature perspective imo.

Seeing fans from different sides of both the TMNT and Usagi fandoms voice different opinions based on assumptions of the show has been a bit frustrating to see (maybe much less so if I only look at fanart, but it's been both "older" and younger fans), so this has been refreshing to re-listen to because it really only looks at the show from creative and collaborative viewpoints vs what people seem to assume that Netflix shows are all about - money and profit and keeping up only some sort of live-wire.

I personally really think the show probably could have had a bigger "impact" with the story if it took some bigger risks, but at the same time, they did their best with what they were given in terms of budget, which I'm remembering again after listening to the creative ways they had to avoid some shots or how some storylines got cut. It's a very creative and easy-going show to me, even if it's not "the best" in terms of what people have come to expect from cartoon shows for kids now.

It's also really interesting to listen to the interview again with subtitles and getting some of the context better (like how the makkine and spaceships, there was a certain inspiration they we're looking at outside of comics - "Robot Carnival" - an animated film I was only vaguely aware of before).

I also found the artist who did the layouts and special poses for the 2D sequences, which was so cool to find! I'm so glad that the Samurai Rabbit crew and artists have been proud to post their work on the series so far as I found a few artists' portfolios/galleries and blogs last month as well. Not gonna repost those (that's obviously just rude without permission and no one wants to get in trouble for that) but it would be cool to share links to those too if people were interested x3

anyway, it's amazing this show exists at all, whatever anyone else thinks.

[jakowskis]

Day 24 - Discuss Ianto. Opinions? Favorite moment? Least favorite moment? Any unpopular opinions? Any fun headcanons?

putting this under a cut cuz im noivous + i didnt rlly write a good introductory paragraph

iantoooo ok. i have an interesting relationship with ianto, namely bc i love him a lot but i think im enjoying a much different version of him than the one most people like. idk how to explain it exactly, but like, i came to care about him when i started writing in his pov for owento fic, if that tells you anything fhdfjkd. i think that’s a pretty specific and semi-unorthodox way to get acquainted with a character, by sticking them in a kinda toxic relationship that’s not their canon one, + is largely a product of ur imagination + other fic fsdhkfjds. needless to say, i’m immensely fond of the ianto in my head, who i think does exist in the canon character but just isn’t someone we see expanded upon (owento being epic toxic yaoi is such a feasible concept to me fhsdfjksd i think they very well could’ve happened in another life) - but, for obvious reasons, that ianto isn’t a ianto most other people can conceive of, ykwim? long story short, i’m sitting over here cradling my fucked up version of ianto who’s doing some crazy shit with owen, and it makes me feel p detached from other ianto enjoyers (aka, yknow, practically the whole fandom fshdfks).

that being said! i am fond of canon ianto. i found him kinda underwhelming in the first two seasons, he’s just kind of... there, which makes his popularity a bit surprising, if i’m honest. he’s endearing, but not that endearing. but he’s a lot more fleshed out in the audios, which is where i came to rlly enjoy him on his own, rather than just the version of him i’ve crafted as a writer. but i think part of his popularity is that he’s a bit of a blank slate, so people have a lot of freedom to run with him, and that’s definitely a lot of fun when ur a writer (hell, both for the official writers + the fanfic writers). we know his blandness is a mask, which means plenty of things could be hiding under there, and there’s a lot of fun interpretations out there as a result. some i don’t quite agree with, ofc, but hey, we’re all here to have a good time. more on that when i talk about unpopular opinions. 

he does have his moments, of course. i think my favorite ianto moments are the entirety of captain jack harkness (him and owen in that episode really changed my life as i’ve said dozens of times fhsdkjdks. when he pointed that gun at owen smth in my brain shifted HFJKSDHDS), and then “pray they survive” in meat. can you tell i like badass!ianto. of course, i enjoy his dorky moments, too. i like that he’s more comfortable and companionable in season 2 and as a result he’s full of quips. i listened to the one restricted items archive audio earlier this month, he’s soo much fun in that one, so much personality. same with believe, both gave me a lot of insight into him that the show initially really didn’t bother with, and it was such a joy. funky little lad. i’ve said this before, but i often get annoyed by characters (+ ships) that are hugely popular in a fandom, and i’ve had moments where i’ve been mildly annoyed by ianto as a result (seeing as i’m largely a owen&tosh&gwen girlie and jack & ianto so aggressively dominate things) - but i legitimately can’t bring myself to actually dislike him. i’m not immune to ianto jones. sigh. 

but yeah, cyberwoman was when i went “oh, he’s fucked up, ok hi” - but captain jack harkness was when i went “oh, he’s fucked up, ok hi” FJKSDF like that was when he first started to actually intrigue me, and the ianto i’m most interested in is the one we see in that episode. it’s a darker sort of ianto, and that stifled darkness is what i find compelling about the character + what i’m interested in exploring. and that’s why i like owento, bc owen’s such a live wire he kind of forces ianto’s repressed qualities to the surface - and that has a lot of potential. i talked about it here, when i talked about why i ship them - this post is about ianto on his own, ofc, but he’s one of the two characters in my torchwood otp, so i can’t help but mention it. i just find that ship super handy for playing with what i consider to be ianto’s most compelling qualities, that the show doesn’t fully capitalize on. of course, as we know, i’ve yet to watch s3 and i have a feeling it’ll happen there. i’m eager to see! 

i don’t really have a least favorite ianto moment, other than how often he’s simply reduced down to being jack’s boytoy + that he’s underdeveloped and just kind of eye-candy, + then comic relief as well in s2. oh! but i laugh hysterically every time he cries on screen. i can’t help it, it’s so funny the way he wails. but those aren’t ‘least fav’ moments so much as ‘ianto moments i cannot fucking take seriously’. 

unpopular opinions time! don’t kill me

he’s a liiiittle bit overrated ;-;

he’s soooo much more interesting outside of his relationship with jack. jack stifles him a lot.

him and jack have zero chemistry onscreen too like they look very forced to me

...he has 10x more chemistry with owen 😗

fandom j*nto fucking sucks + i have no interest in it

i HATE what ianto’s reduced to in a lot of fics. he's not at all cutesy n ineffectual idk where tf that came from

he’s a dom 🫵 and a top-leaning vers. grr. 

top/bottom discourse is so stupid + immature but my main thing is just. don't be tropey with it ugh. wooby uwu uke ianto is a fucking plague. it's gross n such an injustice to his character. makes me 🤒 every time im subjected to it. treat characters like real humans w real sexual leanings and desires don't just shepherd them into weird fetishy roles cuz u think its cute n hot 😒 im not here to police anyone's fandom experience it just makes my life worse FSDJKF so im allowed to bitch about it. fandom is my hobby tht makes me smileeee and i hate when things make me Frown yknow ffff

love him to bits as a person + he definitely has some rlly good moments but some of gareth’s acting as ianto is laughable 😭 mostly emotional scenes. i make fun of ‘havent you ever loved anyone jack wahh’ a lot SORRY im mean. thats probs also why i liked cjh sm i was like oh shit he can act. IM SORRY it had to be said. b*rrowman’s the other actor i struggle to take seriously and thats probs also why j*nto doesn’t compel me like. they both come at it from such a campy (/neg) angle to me ngl

hcs… idk if i rlly have any hcs for him? none are coming to mind. i’ll probs come up w some as my owento verse develops. i think i peppered a few random ones into my big fic dhfj im sure ill come up with more. 

[nightmare-followup]

learning basic atomic theory and a bunch of electricity stuff for a stage lighting class. my brain does NOT hold onto it. i’ll overexplain it here for everyone’s convenience with way too much paraphrasing and strange connections. hey, maybe someone will use this later.

okay- starting on atoms: they’ve got 3 things- i think everyone knows protons neutrons and electrons. protons are “pro” as in positive- that’s what their charge is. neutrons “neu” like “neutral”- there’s no charge. electrons is the last one so they’re negative. i don’t have a fun brain trick for that- i think everyone knows those anyways so we can all figure it out.

now- atoms aren’t always specifically stable (meaning they have an equal amount of protons and electrons), but they’ll always be sorta like- searching for stability- or more like stray particles will be looking for unbalanced electrons with space in them to join so they can find a house. if you like- see static electricity on your blanket in the dark those are electrons floating around and finding atoms basically (i am no expert.) and when electrons are in an atom they all have super funky orbital paths and no path is like another- something something snowflakes and their uniqueness. and the like- furthest out plane of orbit is called the “valance shell” and the way all the electrons go through a conductor is what makes an electrical current. :) if you’ve heard “amps” as a unit of measure that’s for electrical current which is just electrons moving around!

you guys know the whole “opposites attract” bit of every fandoms favorite ship ever? that’s an electricity thing- law of charges positive and negative charges attract while same-same charges push each other away- that’s why magnets like- only have one side they stick to each other with.

anyways have you heard like “electrical potential” b4? yeah that’s just the difference between two electrical charges in two bodies. it sounds like- crazy sometimes in movies or whatever but atomically it’s just… like not that big a deal i guess?

and there’s resistance in every conductor which opposes the flow of electrons, slowing them down. it’s like how moving through water you’re slower- tho there’s still air resistance. same concept. actually to my knowledge on an atomic level it actually is the same thing so- yeah. gold is the best conductor and ppl actually used to wire with it but we use copper usually now cause gold is PRICEY and that’s how you get robbed of ur wires. they will go in your walls and steal your wires if you use gold don’t test those robbers and their tiptoeing and big sacks thrown over their shoulders.

volts measure electric potential, watts measure how much electricity is consumed. so like- check your extension cords and whatever you’re plugging into it b4 you try and run a hairdryer or a kettle on it cause that can like- overdraw energy from ur extension chord and cause fun things like fires which honestly i don’t think many wanna deal with an electrical fire.

insulators also don’t like- just stop electrical flow they OPPOSE it which- as someone who is stupid about electricity that was pretty cool to learn :)

now- we usually use 2 types of currents in our day-to-day lives. alternating currents- which like- switch directions a bunch super super fast (which is why lights kinda buzz- which you can see a lot better on cameras and most ppl can’t see that with their naked eye at all) and that’s in outlets (including outlets that lead to lights and heating equipment and stuff) then we have direct currents that only go in one direction- like batteries. which is why there’s a positive and negative side of a battery.

in any electrical system there is 3 main components: the power source, the load which converts electricity into whatever type of energy is needed, then the circuit which is just the path where the current goes along.

circuits are pretty cool cause there’s the types that are like- string lights where they light up everything in a line (that’s why if one light goes out the whole string goes out) then there are types that split up the electricity to go to multiple places at once! like- those bathroom lights with 2 lightbulbs- if one goes out they don’t both die. in fact i lived half my life with one of the lightbulbs out in the bathroom. i moved but i wouldn’t be surprised if it’s still out tbh-

now after all that: don’t fuck with electricity without knowing what you’re doing, it CAN and WILL kill you and i have not informed you of SHIT that will keep anyone safe. there are some systems in place to keep everyone’s dumbass safe like fuses that stop circuits from overloading by breaking the circuits before serious damage can be done and circuit breakers which does the same basic thing. but even with those like- you can still get urself seriously injured and killed so like- don’t mess with stuff unless you actually legit know what ur doing.

[cherryxxmoon]

– 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐬 𝐬𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐞𝐝

Rating: M Fandom: Naruto Relationship: Haruno Sakura/Uchiha Sasuke Characters: Haruno Sakura, Uchiha Sasuke Secret and hidden, as they had been since childhood. In public, stolen glances, polite customs imposed by their class. In private, tender caresses and, with time, lustful exchanges, grafted by an uncontrollable, inevitable passion.

Their meeting places were the most varied, although they preferred to linger in the cornfields surrounding the Haruno mansion, where the tall golden wires allowed them to enclose themselves in their personal illusion, far from everything that was only a few meters away.

Sasuke was on top of her, his body firmly clamped between her legs. He was burying himself inside her body and soul with impetuous gestures, invigorated by the frustration which had been shadowing over them for the past few months, which was finding vent in the very last few hours. They both knew that moment would come sooner or later. Sakura's moans were muffled by his voracious mouth, by the ravenous kiss they exchanged as their bodies became one with each other.

"I'm sorry..." She mumbled between pants after a few moments, clutching him to her with more vigor, trapping him with her arms and legs, almost as if she feared that really the dark-haired might vanish in a cloud of smoke at any moment, or worse voluntarily decide he had enough, that he couldn't go on. Sasuke's right hand closed into a fist around a few strands of wheat which surrounded them, his forehead pressed against hers, his eyelids drooping instinctively, depriving himself of the sight of her face, a mixture of immense pleasure and agonizing grief.

She had tried in every way to postpone that moment, to prevent her father from finding her a suitable suitor, one that would meet his expectations, with a good name, a good position, the right attributes which would allow him to take over the Haruno's business over the years. That morning he had announced to her he had found the perfect candidate, without giving her a chance to express herself, to give her opinion. She could not choose, for if she did it would be him. No one but him. No one but Sasuke. And it had always been him, ever since they chased each other between those same fields as kids, heedless of the difference in class, just eager to enjoy each other's company.

"I would like to marry you. No one else..." Her right hand slid from his shoulder up to his face, over his cheeks, which were beaded with a few drops of sweat. Hers, on the other hand, were streaked with a few tears. "As we promised each other." The dark-haired bit his lower lip, continuing to embed himself into her, tightening the fingers of his left hand around her soft, pearly skin. He seemed to give the impression he didn't even hear her, but Sakura knew it was just the opposite.

And it had always been there, in those fields, that as young and naive they had promised each other the rest of their lives would be spent together, like their childhood. You will be my wife. He had announced to her with vigor and enthusiasm, unaware of the social chasm which divided them. I will make you as happy as you make me. She had replied, smiling and with her cheeks tinged with a slight and adorable blush.

Innocent and foolish. A silliness which was confirmed when, more adult and aware of the world they lived in, of the cruelty of fate that had led them to love each other in those circumstances, they had also given in and lingered, aware of the agony that would inevitably come for them.

When Sakura moaned and arched her back, the dark-haired let his lips slide down her neck, travelling down her chest, seeking and finding her soft, firm breasts. He kissed her skin so tenderly it seemed a sad paradox compared to the urgent movements of his body, the eagerness with which he explored her from the inside, enveloping himself in her core, between the wetted walls which trapped and claimed him.

"Marry me, then." Words mingled with pants, muffled by the occasional pressure of his lips against her skin. Despite this, she didn't believe for a moment she had misheard, misinterpreted, imagined, as if it were a manifestation of her desires.

"Sasuke..." The dark-haired said nothing, merely switching their positions. He was looking at her now, his dark eyes filled with agony and hope, from the desire to have her again and again, from the need for their future together to be written and not to see its end in that very instant, with their bodies united as it should be but with the peril that would be the last time. Sakura kissed him, gripping his face with her hands, her palms pressed against his cheeks as her hips moved spontaneously, seeking the pleasure they were both incapable of depriving themselves of.

"We're not children anymore." She whispered then against his lips, their warm breaths going to mingle. Sasuke ran his hands down her back, accompanying her sinuous yet urgent and desperate movements.

"But I love you just like then." The dark-haired hid his face, pressing it once more against her chest, between her breasts, perhaps not out of simple lust this time.

Sakura was silent for a few moments, in which only moans escaped from her full lips, demonstrations of a pleasure which disregarded carnal need, that went beyond and settled in her, in her soul pierced by a single name, as her body was filled by a single person.

"Run away with me." This time she thought she was imagining, that her mind, mad with sorrow and pleasure, was playing a cruel trick on her, materializing the very thing her heart yearned to hear. Then, Sasuke sought her gaze again, ignited by sparks of insane hope. "Leave your family and I will leave mine. I don’t care about the consequences on my father..." It was he who kissed her again, with a vigor fueled by his resolve. "And even less about the reputation of yours..." The young pink-haired barely tilted her head back, exposing her neck to Sasuke, who rapidly pounced on it with his lips. "So no one else will have you but me." It could have been momentary exaltation, thoughts induced by the inebriation of pleasure, the desperate desire to seek relief from pain.

"I love you so much, Sasuke." Perhaps her own senses were dulled by ecstasy as she pressed against his chest to induce him to fall back with his back to the ground. Pulling him away just to perceive him closer. Distance him to allow him to bury himself in her to the deepest meanders. She towered over him, moving against his body, pressing her hands against his chest, preventing him from coming any closer. Yet, he was the one who had her completely in his grasp, trapped by his face, his eyes, his words, burrowed into her soul, like his member embedded in her core.

"Say yes, Sakura." A plea, in contrast to the firmness with which the dark-haired felt her breasts and clutched her side. "Tell me it's what you want."

"Yes." She exhaled between moans, now surrendered to the pleasure as much as to his desire, to the need to please him and herself. "I want it..." Even the pressure of her hands didn't stop him from overpowering her with his impetus and suddenly lifting his back. Sasuke held her tightly to him, leading each of her swings with the strength of his arms, guiding them both to the climax of what they were consuming and what they were ready to run away for. There, where the matured love culminated and which would not perish under the weight of any obstacle. They would stay together and that very instant only sanctioned the beginning of the life they had promised each other.

[makeste]

I saw this take on twitter about Hana & Kacchan having “reverse parallels” and since they both have apologised to Tenko/Deku (but one was more or less sincere and the other was absolutely sincere) and they said that, while Hana moved away from Tenko, Kacchan ran to catch Deku. There was also more to the thread abt Kacchan & Hana’s differences. They were sorta trying to argue that this is a clue that Hori intends for Bkdk to be sibling-like/brotherly. As a bkdk shipped, I’ve accepted that it makes sense.. cause it’s an established fact that Tenko & Deku parallel each other. Tenko having his own “Kacchan” makes sense. Tho yes I am a little sad since I’ve held a little bit of hope for romantic bkdk becoming canon. I just wanted to ask your opinion if Hana was really meant to foil Kacchan or was it just a reach?

okay so I have a couple responses to this.

1. while it's true that Horikoshi has woven a lot of deliberate parallels between Deku and Tenko's characters, that doesn't mean every single thing about their lives and every single person they interact with is a part of those parallels. which is to say that no, I don't really think Hana and Kacchan are meant to mirror each other in any kind of significant way. Hana's apology to Tenko was under completely different circumstances than Kacchan's apology to Deku; I really don't see any connection between the two situations. you might as well be trying to compare Hana to Endeavor, or Deku, or Hawks, or Aizawa, or any other character who's apologized to anyone over the course of the story.

2. please pardon the forthcoming rant, anon -- and I hope you know that none of this is aimed at you in particular -- but for me personally, this whole obsession with ships becoming canon is one of the most exasperating types of discourse there is. like, don't get me wrong, I totally understand people wanting to see their favorite ships validated by the author, and not to mention there's also the issue of having more LGBTQ+ representation. but speaking as someone whose own orientation (aromantic) has almost no representation in fiction whatsoever, it gets frustrating to see so many people dismiss non-romantic relationships as being an inferior type of ship, to the extent that calling a relationship "sibling-like" is now a commonly-used attack in ship wars. so many people view romance as this completely transformative element, to the point where two characters can literally tick every other box on the intimate personal relationship checklist, and none of it will matter to some people unless they actually confess their love and kiss.

and again, I'm not saying I don't understand it, especially since queerbating is a thing. it's one thing if a writer is genuinely just trying to portray a close friendship, especially in series where romance isn't really a focus. but it's another thing entirely if a writer is deliberately hinting at a romance in a blatant bid to attract a larger queer audience, while all the while having no intention whatsoever of having those hints lead anywhere. the issue, I guess, is that it's not always easy to tell which scenarios are the former, and which are the latter. and of course, you also have people who think that the former is a type of cop-out as well, because the thing is that romance is always viewed as the default. so for a lot of people, allosexual and alloromantic relationships are the only ones that get considered as far as representation goes.

but you know what, I'm just gonna say it; even knowing where people are coming from, it's still discouraging to know that so many people are so dismissive of aro and ace relationships that the thought of a favorite ship not becoming romantic in canon is considered a profound disappointment. and it's even more discouraging that the thought of a rival ship becoming canon is considered such an existential threat to some that they will literally use "oh, they're just like siblings" as an argument against the ship, rather than a point in favor of. because siblings are a downgrade. friendship is a downgrade. any kind of close relationship that isn't inherently romantic or sexual in nature is less important, and that's just how it is.

so yeah, that's kind of a pet peeve, ngl. especially since the truth is I actually do think Bakugou and Deku's relationship is very akin to siblings. and so I do sometimes get weary of not being able to just outright say that without having to first pepper the statement with all kinds of disclaimers so that people don't think I'm invalidating the ship. I feel like I have to walk on eggshells if I ever want to talk about their relationship in terms that I can personally relate to.

but I mean, here's how I look at it. they've known each other since they were small children. they call each other exclusively (or almost exclusively) by childhood nicknames. they have an openness and an unspoken, almost taken-for-granted trust in each other to the point where they'll share closely guarded secrets ("I got my quirk from someone else") and personal vulnerabilities ("why was I the one who ended All Might?") with barely a second's hesitation which they would never share with anyone else. they have a comfortable little bickering type of rapport ("I'm getting stronger"; "well I'll just have to get even stronger then"; "you'll never surpass me"; "we'll see about that") which they can fall into with ease and which looks weird af to outsiders, but is "normal" to them and something they're both grateful to have.

they're so intimately familiar with each other's personality and behaviors that they can predict them with perfect accuracy. they're so in tune with each other that they can whip up elaborate coordinated attacks right on the spot in perfect sync. their admiration for each other is so strong that they each think of the other as being the epitome of winning and saving, respectively. their mental images of each other are so vivid that they subconsciously mimic each other's speech patterns whenever they start falling into a particularly strong Win or Save mindset themselves. they take no small amount of pride in showing off for each other. they go apeshit any time the other is in danger or hurt. and each of them would literally die for the other if it ever came to that.

all of that is already canon. on just about every metric imaginable except for "now kiss", the two of them already have a canon intimacy that rivals just about every other great relationship out there. and so to say that none of it actually counts unless there's an actual love confession involved frankly just boggles me. again, maybe it's because I have no personal vested interest in romance myself, though. I'm literally just not wired that way, and so I'm really not the best person to vent to when it comes to these kinds of concerns.

but look, no matter what happens from here on out, these two care about each other on a very deep and personal level. they're going to continue to be a part of each other's lives no matter what. and each of them, no matter what, will continue to occupy a space in each other's lives that no other person can fill, regardless of how we or Horikoshi or anyone else choose to label and define that space. and so in my book, that's already a win.

anyways, apologies again for the impromptu rant. again, this wasn't particularly directed at you in any way; if anything it's mostly just a generic response to the constant shipping discourse in this and every other fandom, and a more detailed explanation for why I personally don't like to get involved in it. this is just one of the myriad reasons why I try my best to stay very far away from BnHA twitter lol.