#the colours do mean stuff but i forgot to make a key so whatever. i know what this is

[gorgynei]

[scaly-freaks]

Hiiii!! I fell in love with 'until the colours fade' and the end made me think that maybe Aegon was going to commit su*cide? it felt open ended too as if maybe he could work things out with Jae and they could be the family they both so desperately need. I was so angry with Aegon at first because the neglecting hit close to home, but I ended up feeling sad for both of them in the end. It felt like you meant to keep the mother unnamed but was she Amara? i wanted to guess because of the moodboard and the girl with the dark hair.

If you want to reveal anything about their life when she was still alive I'd really love that!! The idea of Aegon mourning her when he found out she died just made me so sad and I didn't even wannt to imagine it because they always feel so joined in my mind

Aaahhhh thank you so much (and thank you for being so sweet with your request omg)

It is open-ended. It's ultimately up to the reader to decide what happens without any input from me. My irls read the fic today and were dragging Aegon over the coals because they refused to accept that anyone once they've become a parent has any excuse not to raise a perfectly normal, well balanced child, which I didn't agree with, but to each their own. Traumatised children grow up to become parents all the time and don't stop being traumatised. All you can do is your best, even if that counts as bare minimum to someone else. To you, that is your best. Your intentions are there.

Aegon definitely didn't mean to let his intentions slip, but after the mother's death, aka someone he obviously relied on heavily in terms of emotional support, he lost his mind a little bit. His family is busy with their own lives, and are also quite neglectful of him because I imagine he's not the success story amongst the Targ-Hightowers. No one came to his house after the funeral to clean up and make sure there was food in the fridge when he got back. That's how they never realised Jae was still there until a week and a half later. He had the excuse (barely) of numbing himself on alcohol and drugs to avoid facing up to the fact that his wife was gone, hence why he forgot her. He let Jaehaera parent herself which was also wrong, and she became a latch key kid pretty much. If the electric bill isn't paid, the washing machine isn't working, and then who's cleaning her underwear? At eleven, she's probably thinking whatever, it's fine i'll reuse it, it doesn't look dirty because no one's teaching her that stuff (can't even say it's common sense because kids will be kids). She hasn't started her period yet, but I imagine Aegon would be a lot more aware of that this time round and actually buy her the stuff before he drags Helaena in to explain it all LOL.

And yes, 'Momma' was in fact Amara. And yuupppp, pulled my heartstrings to think of Aegon losing her. She was a baby having a baby, and then suddenly she was gone and Jaehaerys went with her.

Their life before she died was happy, I must admit. They both obviously struggled massively with mental illness and addiction and whatnot, but the kids were their pride and joy, something they made between them and would go to the ends of the earth for. Aegon was a good dad before she died, which is the most heartbreaking bit. Glimpses of it come through, for instance the glitter shampoo, buying Jae sweets after they fight, running after the ice cream van, but these are all notably things he did when she was way younger and before Amara died, suggesting he's frozen in time. Jae is growing up, and her Dad is failing to keep up. He's sluggish and trapped in memories he wants to return to. He used to put his all into making sure his kids were happy on the little money they had, and that his wife wasn't sinking into her depression again (Amara went through a couple suicide attempts during her post-partum period). She was terrified she'd go through with it one day and that it would never end even once the kids were older, and Aegon was the one who was like I won't let you, I promise, I'll keep you here even if it's not that simple.

The sad irony is she died and it was completely out of both their hands. She didn't want to leave, but she did. He tells Jaehaera no, baby, you're all me to disguise the fact that she has her mother's eyes and those eyes haven't looked at him the same since Amara died. Obviously Jaehaera's lonely and depressed and struggling to cope, so when she looks at her dad, he sees all those things staring back at him. He sees what Amara used to look like in her worst moments, but he doesn't have half the mental and emotional energy he used to in order to help his daughter. Instead, he drowns and watches her drown with him.

Amara is probably somewhere in the afterlife crying over the pair of them and not enjoying heaven I'm ngl 😭

[zero-ek]

It's M3 week again and for whatever reason all the utaites i follow decided to release their XFDs at the same time so here's just the one big fangirling post.

So first off Tamu because this woman has been high tension the whole year like girl chill

JAZZ TAMU!!! I THINK??? MAYBE!!! That second track is looking promising but it could just be a more brass pop thing like it was with Persona. A surprising lack of heavy songs though, i mean, Son macabre does sound like it has some rock guitars and a big chorus, but at least from the preview it doesn't sound as "aggressive" as like Anamnesis or Spider Girl.

Also i love the story for this album, a student killing her classmates because of a technodrug sounds super cool, i'm pretty sure that was a GItS storyline.

All rock? In a Nayuta album? What is this timeline?

Only 3 new songs on this one but honestly i don't even care with how much she's already been doing these past 2 years, besides, the singles she released this year were absolute bangers (Yukinika and Vacancy are probably some of my favorite stuff from her.)

I'm particularly happy with how this one feels more in line with stuff like Decillion Encounter and Portray Blue, which was when i first discovered her (i do love her concept albums, it's just a special nostalgic thing for me.)

There's also the NaYuri one:

Very interesting that they're doing another single, especially considering Yuuri was the guest for Nayuta's concert this year, which makes me believe NaYuri is gonna be a thing from now on. I do like Yuuri's voice, she's very much in that category of utaite i'm usually drawn to, but i never really paid much attention to the NaYuri songs that were already out, so i guess this is my wake-up call.

On the topic of returning to form, Nacollection 4!

I really like the Nacollection ones since they're very diverse by design, which i guess the previous album also was, but i've always known Naku-cha as the one who sings the darker stuff (outside of like LaPri and Endorfin), so seeing where she takes her vocals on these makes for a much more enjoyable listen imo.

Also, three Feryquitous songs on this one, (though none of them are new) i was starting to miss these two together since last album only had like i think one.

I wish Nacollection 1 still existed...

Still on Naku-cha:

Currently floored that Endorfin has 12 albums out, like yeah granted some of them only have like 3 songs but i actually forgot Endorfin was a thing for that long.

I wasn't really a fan of the Colours albums initially, since they had a kinda same-y vibe across their songs, but they've been recently growing on me recently, i think the upbeat "sunny-high-school-day" aesthetic marries Naku-cha's airy voice real nice.

Also the single for this one was really cool so that helped too i guess.

The whiplash that her voice gives between songs 2 and three lmao.

I feel like between this and the previous two or so albums Sennzai has really perfected the "listen to this while becoming a god" vibe, whether she wanted to or not. Like, even her calmer songs have this air of grandeur that gets your mind going on all kinds of different imagery.

And this one seems to be leaning extra hard on how imposing her voice can be compared to Prismtone, i mean, that one had some upbeat jazz here, some medieval sounding stuff there, but this one seems to be pretty much all heart-pumping minor-key only, even on the "calm" songs.

I'm just hoping that the overabundance of God-ish Sennzai doesn't cause the apocalypse.

[townofcrosshollow]

Twine Sugarcube 101

AKA, all you need to make a Twine game (I swear to god)

I’ve seen a lot of people go “Twine is too complicated for me :(” and give up before they’ve even started. And that makes me sad, partly because they’re giving up on a really cool hobby, and also because that’s false! It’s absolutely not too complicated for you!

I think the problem is that people look up Twine, see the documentation, and go “There’s way too much there! I can’t learn all that!” Well guess what- you shouldn’t learn all that, at least not yet. As a beginner you can skip pretty much all of this:

(Ignore <<linkappend>> too, forgot to crop that one out)

That’s a lot more manageable, right? Below the cut, I’ll let you know how to use all those remaining important things to make your story! Warning- it’s quite long! You might want to read it in sections! And while I’ll try to keep it entertaining, it’s also a coding tutorial, so... y’know. Might not be the most exciting read if you aren’t trying to learn Twine.

Welcome to below the cut!

First off, make sure your story format is set to Sugarcube 2. On the right side of the home screen (with all your stories), click format and choose the one labeled “Sugarcube 2.x.x” then open a new story with the green button! Here’s what you’ll see and what it all means:

Passages are all like individual web pages that you navigate between to play the game. When they’re linked together they’ll be shown like this:

Anything you write in a passage will just be shown on screen as plain text, no code required! But if you want to make anything more than just one passage with a bunch of text, you’ll have to link passages together with...

Links!

A link is composed of two parts- the text you see on screen, and the name of the passage you’re attaching it to. These are enclosed in [[double square brackets]], with a vertical bar | or a little arrow -> between them. If you want to show the passage name instead of alternative text, you can just put the passage name in square brackets alone! So this in the editor:

[[Visible text|Passage name]]

[[Visible text->Passage name]]

[[Passage name]]

Will look like this in the story:

Visible text

Visible text

Passage name

And all of them will lead to the passage labeled “Passage name.” You don’t even need to create the passage- when Twine sees that you’ve linked to a passage that doesn’t exist, it’ll add that passage for you.

That’s all you need to know! Technically, all you need to do to make a Twine story is add those fancy links between passages. If you add your awesome writing skills, that story will be super cool!

...but you want to do some fancy shit, right? Well let me introduce you to the next step up in complexity,

Variables!

“Variable” is a fun, code-y way to say “a bit of information that can change.” You could say they... vary.

Variables are useful for keeping track of information. If the player chooses to be blonde instead of a redhead, you might want to bring that up again- but you probably don’t want to write an entirely separate story based on that choice, right? So instead you save that information as a variable.

In Twine, variables are written as words with a $ in front of them. So my hair colour variable might be “$hairColour.” If you just write the variable out without any code, Twine will print the information you put into the variable. So if $hairColour is set to “blonde,” this...

She had $hairColour hair.

Will become...

She had blonde hair.

The value in a variable can be a boolean (ie. true or false), a number, or a string (like “blonde” or “any other string of characters”). They can also be fancy stuff like arrays, but we won’t be touching on that.

You can use variables to keep track of a lot of things! For instance...

How much money the player has

Whether a player has a key

What the player’s name is

I keep mentioning the value of a variable or “setting” it, but how do you do that? Well, one way is to add it to a link. If you want a link to set hair colour to blonde, for instance, you could write [[Blonde|Next passage][$hairColour to “blonde”]]. Clicking on that link would forward the player to “Next passage” and set the value of $hairColour to “blonde.”

There is a better way of doing it, however, but we’ll need to talk about...

Macros!

A macro is a snippet of code that runs when you put a special code word inside these <<spiky boys>>. You can write your own macros with JavaScript if you’re smart, find them on the internet if you’re even more smart, or just use the ones that come built in with Sugarcube.

The ones we’ll be talking about, and the ones that are the most important for most Twine games, are <<set>>, <<if>>, and <<link>>.

<<set>>

The <<set>> macro allows you to, you guessed it, assign a value to a variable. For instance, if you want to set $hairColour to blonde... well, that’s all you need to do! It’s just:

<<set $hairColour to “blonde”>>

It’s important to remember with the <<set>> macro that strings (collections of different characters) require quotation marks around them to show the code that it isn’t a number or a true/false value. If you put quotes around a number and try to do math with that variable, you’ll get a big ol’ error message.

If you’re using numbers, you can also use JavaScript operators in place of “to.” Each one will perform a calculation on the variable if that variable is a number, and then replace the variable with the result. If you want to add $5 to the player’s $money, you could use this:

<<set $money += 5>>

The “+=“ will add the number on the right to the variable on the left. “-=“ will do the same for subtraction, “*=“ for multiplication, and “/=“ for division. Easy enough, just don’t forget the = sign after the usual symbol!

By default, the <<set>> macro will be executed as soon as the page it’s on loads. Sometimes that’s useful, but sometimes you would rather the player click a link that sets a variable- like if they choose a hair colour. You might also want the same link to set multiple variables, like subtracting money and giving them an item when they use a shop. How do we do that?

<<link>>

The <<link>> macro is also pretty simple. All it does is create a link, and when that link it pressed it executes whatever is inside of it. Here we’ll be using it with <<set>>, but you can use it with all kinds of different macros and even nest some of them to do really complicated stuff!

As an example, we want the player to click “buy key,” give the player the key, and subtract $5 from their money. Here’s how we do it:

<<link “Buy key”>>

<<set $key to true>>

<<set $money -= 5>>

<</link>>

The text the player will click is in quotation marks, and after all of the macros we need to execute we have to close off the code by adding <</link>>. Easy, right?

But other than printing them on the screen, what can you actually use those variables for? Well, for that we’ll be using...

<<if>>

The <<if>> macro is my favourite, hands down, because it’s an easy way of accomplishing hard stuff. Simply put, <<if>> will check if the thing you asked about is true, and if it is, it will do whatever you put inside of it.

Here’s a simple example:

<<if $key is true>>

[[Use the key|Progress]]

<</if>>

Whatever is inside the <<if>> macro will be executed if the “if” statement is true. In this case, the link “Use the key” will be printed on the screen only if the player has the key. This also applies to code- if you put a <<set>> macro inside, that macro would only set a variable if the player has the key.

Now here’s a more complicated example, to show everything the <<if>> macro is capable of. Here we also want to check if they’ve already opened the door, and display alternate text if they have no key and the door is locked.

<<if $key is true>>

[[Use the key|Progress]]

<<elseif $doorOpen is true>>

[[Walk through|Progress]]

<<else>>

You need to find a key.

<</if>>

I’ll break it down line by line to tell you what each thing does.

<<if $key is true>>

This line is the only necessary one- it checks whether $key has been set to true. You can check for any value that a variable can be, like a number, true/false, or a string. You can also check for other things with this macro- for instance, “isnot” will check that the variable isn’t equal to the value on the right. “gt” or “lt” will check if the variable is greater/lesser than the value on the right, and “gte” or “lte” will check if it is greater than or equal to the value.

<<elseif $doorOpen is true>>

This line allows us to check for something else within the same <<if>> macro. Once the game has checked the original <<if>> and found that it is false, it will move on to checking each <<elseif>> until it finds one that is true. You can have as many <<elseif>>s as you need, and they can check the same variable or different variables, but only the first true one will be executed! And, of course, you can’t use <<elseif>> on its own- it’s stuck to the <<if>> macro!

<<else>>

This line is the last resort- if the original <<if>> and any <<elseif>>s have all been false, the game will execute whatever is after <<else>>. Because of this, there can only be one <<else>> line within any <<if>> macro! If you don’t have an <<else>>, nothing at all will be executed, so whether you include one depends on the situation.

<</if>>

This closes off the <<if>> macro. Nothing special, but very important! Put it after the last piece of code or bit of text you want the macro to control.

Phew. That’s it! That’s all I wanted to show you!

Now, HOMEWORK!

Okay, not homework, just practice. Here are some things you can try building to practice all these tools and get comfortable with how they work!

A store system with different items for different amounts of money

A character creation screen, followed by a description of your character (with variables!)

A puzzle that requires you to choose the right answer to proceed

If you have any trouble, need to ask any questions, or if something in this tutorial wasn’t clear to you, please let me know- you can DM me or send me an ask anytime and I’m happy to answer any Twine questions you have. I hope this was of use to you, and have fun making games <3

[hoseokslefteyebrow]

You've Met With A Terrible Fate, Haven't You? || BEN DROWNED

Pairing : Yandere! Ben Drowned X Reader

Genre : Fluff, Angst, Yandere

Summary : Appears as a normal dude, but plot twist he's really not.

Wordcount: 4k lol

WARNINGS : This is fic is labeled as Yandere, for those who don't know what it means: "Somebody who is sweet and kind at first glance. But when it comes to their love (crush)they will act obsessive and violent." - Urban dictionary, poorly (but still disgustingly) described dead people, I know Ben originally doesn't kill but in the story he does, idk? Shit written¿ 

Also disclaimer this is my first time I've tried doing a yandere and it's obviously not my strongest point. Hope you enjoy either way.

You glance at the abandoned game console which your friend had dumped at your place earlier this day.

According to him, something was very, very, wrong with it. The Nintendo 64 was old, of course, but your friend mentioned not being able to pass the boss battle. He mentioned something along the lines of 'it keeps glitching and Link keeps dying'. In other words ' I know you're a hacker and I suck at this game, please hack it for me so I can feel less like a loser'.

You keep writing the email you're supposed to sent to your boss for another thirty minutes, before letting your curiosity lead you. 

Before you know it, you've plugged in the old console with more cables than originally planned because of how old it is, and with how modern your tv is. The first odd thing that strikes you is that there's only one account on it, and it's not labeled with your friend's name. 

Instead of 'Noah', it's labeled with 'BEN DROWNED' in bold passive aggressive letters.

Simply pushing it to the back of your mind, you start playing.

The second odd thing about the game is that the game has a specific date and it mentions how far BEN, or well, Noah is in the game. Yet when you click it, you have to start all over.

You shrug that off too, simply noting it as the game being old.

Before you know it, several hours pass, and you're finally at the boss battle Noah mentioned. Deciding to see if you can beat it first, you do not plug your laptop in at the Nintendo 64, and opt to play instead.

However just like Noah mentioned, you die as soon as you're close to winning and the game starts glitching.

It takes you barely ten minutes before you're fed up with it, and soon enough you plug your laptop in. You start up some programs and open up a few sites, quickly starting to work. Your fingers glide over the keys of your laptop as you type in the codes in order to hack the game, however after a few minutes, the game starts glitching heavily, and suddenly there's a sentence in bold red letters on the screen of your tv.

' YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE DONE THAT'

It says before the glitching becomes way too much, and some weird kind of red circle appears. Your eyes widen before unplugging the tv and game console, forgetting that your laptop is connected to it.

You miss the small glitches on the laptop screen.

- - - ᒪᓍᗩᕲᓰᘉᘜ - - -

He gritts his teeth as the access to his portal is suddenly denied, the power cut early enough to avoid him.

His red eyes wander in the green coded space, looking for an exit, something that'll make sure he can get his hands on whoever this is. Lucky for him, there's a small white space what'll lead to the outside of it.

Once he's trough, he realizes he's still close to his victim. In fact, he's even closer now.

He smirks as he realizes.

Killing her is fair game now.

- - - ᒪᓍᗩᕲᓰᘉᘜ - - - ᖴᓰᒪᘿ ᓍᘉᘿ - - »

You tap your chin as you look as the items on the shelf.

" Should I get the red one or green one?" You mumble to yourself.

" I'd recommend the green one. Green is always better." A voice from behind you startles you.

You whip your head around to look at the stranger who's talking to you.

Behind you is a male you don't recognise from anywhere. And as you start to study him, you realize he's quite handsome. He's got blonde hair, blue eyes and a rosy skin colour. He's wearing black ripped jeans, a dark green shirt, along with a black zip up hoodie, which is left open, he's got a few black ear piercings in his right ear, and has a gold chain around his neck, which disappears beneath his shirt, weighed down by a charm hidden away from your eyes. To top it all of, he's got a matching dark green beanie on top of his messily styled bangs.

" What? Did I say something wrong?" The blonde boy suddenly sweats.

You smile and shake your head.

" No, you didn't. I just tough I was alone here." You smile at him.

ØⱧ ₴₩ɆɆ₮ⱧɆ₳Ɽ₮, ɎØɄ Ⱨ₳VɆ₦'₮ ฿ɆɆ₦ ₳ⱠØ₦Ɇ ₣ØⱤ ₳ VɆⱤɎ ⱠØ₦₲ ₮ł₥Ɇ ₦Ø₩.

" I take that you talk to yourself then?" The male spits at you.

You're not sure if that's meant offensive or not.

" Um, yeah? I tend to do that sometimes yeah." You say, looking down at your hands who're still holding the red silk scarf and green silk scarf.

Đø₦'₮ ฿ɇ ₳₣ɽ₳łđ, ł ₩ø₦'₮ ⱨʉɽ₮ ɏøʉ. Øɽ ₩łⱡⱡ ł?

The unknown male's eyes soften subconsciously, looking at you with an emotion you're not familiar with.

" My name is Ben. What's yours?" 

Ben? Haven't you heard that somewhere before?

You smile at him, oblivious to the fact that you're talking to a killer.

" I'm Y/N. Nice to meet you Ben."

- - - ᒪᓍᗩᕲᓰᘉᘜ - - - ᖴᓰᒪᘿ ᓍᘉᘿ - - - » ᖽᐸᘉᓰᐺᘿS ᓍᖇ ᕼᘿᗩᖇᖶS ? ¿ »

His mind flooded with ideas.

There's so many options on what he can do to her.

Should he mess with her laptop?

Should he just kill her now?

Or should he become closer?

Maybe he should.

He looks at her trough the screen of the laptop, which is almost always open, today not being any different.

He watches her as while she watches something behind the laptop, from the sounds he can hear trough the mic, she's most likely watching tv.

Perhaps he should become closer to her.

Pull her closer only to have her blood staining his hands.

Oh yes, her blood shall soon become his.

- - - ᒪᓍᗩᕲᓰᘉᘜ - - - ᖴᓰᒪᘿ ᓍᘉᘿ - - - » ᖽᐸᘉᓰᐺᘿS ᓍᖇ ᕼᘿᗩᖇᖶS  ? ¿ » - - - ₭₦łvɇ₴

She doesn't realize it when her laptop suddenly starts itself up, nor does she know that there's a figure crawling out of it.

He stared at her with deciphering eyes, silently wondering how she isn't dead yet.

If this was anyone else, he'd had them killed already. Their blood would already be staining his face and she would already be screaming in pain and dispair.

Yet here she was, laying peacefully on her bed. Asleep, obviously not dead. 

He wonders exactly what he should do next. She doesn't know that he's standing right next to her. It almost makes him laugh.

She doesn't even know that he exists.

She doesn't know that he's here.

He glares at her before moving back into the world of codes and technology.

For now, she lives.

- - - ᒪᓍᗩᕲᓰᘉᘜ - - - ᖴᓰᒪᘿ ᓍᘉᘿ - - - » ᖽᐸᘉᓰᐺᘿS ᓍᖇ ᕼᘿᗩᖇᖶS  ? ¿ » - - - ₭₦łvɇ₴ - - - ᖴᗩᓰᒪ

" And then it suddenly started glitching and stuff. Weird isn't it?" You finish off your story as you look at your new friend, Ben.

After meeting in the grocery store, he had suddenly texted you. 

Not knowing how he got your number, you got concerned, and asked him. According to him, you had given it to him yourself. At first you didn't believe him, until he told you to check the time of his first message, which somehow was indeed around the same time you were in the grocery store. After that you just shrugged it off as that you forgot it yourself. After all, you knew yourself to be a person with the memory of a goldfish.

Today the two of you met up again, for the fourth time this week.

" Odd indeed. What did you do after that?" Ben asked, acting as if he's interested, even tough he's really not.

" I unplugged it. I think I'm gonna lay off hacking for a while." You shrugged, taking a sip of your drink.

Before he could even think of a response, there was an unknown woman at your table, also holding a cup of coffee.

" Y/N? Long time no see." The new woman greeted you with a smile, sitting down beside you on the booth.

Ben scowled at the newcomer.

Ⱨø₩ đ₳ɽɇ ₴ⱨɇ ₴ł₮ ฿ɇ₴łđɇ ₩ⱨ₳₮'₴ ₥ł₦ɇ ₩ł₮ⱨøʉ₮ ₥ɏ ₱ɇɽ₥ł₴₴łø₦

" Hey, Sara. It's indeed been too long. How are you?" You started chatting with Sara.

Meanwhile Ben's anger only grew.

" My names Ben." Ben suddenly dryly joined your conversation as he slammed his drink down onto the table aggressively, looking straight into Sara's eyes.

" Sorry. Didn't see you there. I'm Sara nice to mee-"

" Yeah, yeah, whatever. Leave. We didn't invite you to come sit with us." Ben spat at her, looking at her with an intense look in his eyes.

Both you and your friend turned to look at him in confusion.

" Is something wrong with me being here? Did I offend you?" Sara asked, genuinely concerned.

Ben was fuming now, on the inside. Who does this girl think she is? First she comes to sit at their table uninvited, then she's capturing the attention of his new favorite plaything, and now she's questioning him? She has to go.

- - - ᒪᓍᗩᕲᓰᘉᘜ - - - ᖴᓰᒪᘿ ᓍᘉᘿ - - - » ᖽᐸᘉᓰᐺᘿS ᓍᖇ ᕼᘿᗩᖇᖶS  ? ¿ » - - - ₭₦ŁVɆ₴ - - - ᖴᗩᓰᒪ - - - ᖇᘿᗷᓍᓍᖶ SᖻSᖶᘿᘻ

He heard her conversation with a male he certainly doesn't know trough her phone, using the microphone without her knowing.

According to what he knows, they're on a date. And according to her contacts, his name is Jaime. He can't find where they met, nor did he know why they met up.

But now that she's checked her reflexion one too many times, and made a pic of her full outfit to send to him, probably to mock him for not having her, ɏɇ₮, he realizes that she's on a date.

After some research by surfing quite literally trough the internet. It turned out this 'Jaime' person was Mexican, and had a soft persona. On his facebook page were pictures where he's working with animals or doing volunteers' work or overall just something where he's helping others. He found the black haired male pathetic, weak even.

In all honesty, even he himself didn't really find him a threat. Not when he looked like that and was overall just kind and bambi looking.

However, all his expectations are thrown out of the window when he hears them say their goodbyes.

" You know, I had a lot of fun tonight. You're really a nice person. In fact, I'd like to go on another date with you again." This voice was definitely that of a male's, probably Jaime.

" I agree. I had a lot of fun too." She said.

₣Ʉ₦? ⱧØ₩ ₵₳₦ Ł₮ ฿Ɇ ₳₦Ɏ ₣Ʉ₦ ₩Ł₮ⱧØɄ₮ ₥Ɇ?

" Good. Do you have a ride or would you like me to drive you home?-" He blocks out the rest of their conversation.

It appears that the good guy needs to go too.

- - - ᒪᓍᗩᕲᓰᘉᘜ - - - ᖴᓰᒪᘿ ᓍᘉᘿ - - - » ᖽᐸᘉᓰᐺᘿS ᓍᖇ ᕼᘿᗩᖇᖶS  ? ¿ » - - - ₭₦ŁVɆ₴ - - - ᖴᗩᓰᒪ - - - ᖇᘿᗷᓍᓍᖶ SᖻSᖶᘿᘻ - - - ᖇᘿᗷᓍᓍᖶ ᑢᓍᘻᕵᒪᘿᖶᘿ - ᓍᕵᘿᘉ ᖴᓰᒪᘿ ∆

" We should spend more time together." Ben says randomly as the two of you snuggle on the couch.

You giggle, your ears tinting red.

" We're already together all the time tough." You tell him softly.

" I know, but still. By the way, did your stupid date reply yet?" He asked, eyes focused on the tv in front of the two of you.

" No, and don't call him stupid." You pout, softly scolding him.

₲ØØĐ

He grins at you with mysterious eyes.

You shrug it off, knowing it's part of him. The two of you have been hanging out for a while now. Almost three months to be precise. And you two have gotten very close. What used to be keeping distance and keeping the line between acquaintances and friends, had turned into friends or something more. You two almost hung out every day, you were basically attached to each other's hip now.

After a few peacefull moments, you excused yourself to the bathroom.

Right as you left, your phone rang.

He turned to look at the disturbing sound  his eyes widening at the name which is appearing on the screen.

 SARA

He stumbled over the couch to pick it up, an unpleasant feeling of suprise rising whitin him.

" Y/N?! You have to listen to me! Ben is not who you think he is! He's this-"

" I'm this what?" Ben smirked.

Damn you were taking a long time in the bathroom, not that he minded.

The other end of the line was dead silent.

" Don't worry. You don't need to say anything. I'll come home soon. And trust me, once I am, you will never be able to speak a word again." He spoke, an eerie calm in his voice.

" Goodbye, Sara." He said before hanging up.

" Sara called?" Your voice suddenly startled him.

" What? Oh, yeah. But she was in a hurry so she said she'd call you later." He smiled innocently.

You nodded and the two of you resumed watching the movie.

" Isn't there a way, that we could spend more time together?" He suddenly wondered out loud.

You sighed and turned to face him.

" I'm sorry Ben, but I have a job and I like spending time with other people too. So I'm afraid not." You told him softly.

An idea coded itself into his mind.

JɄ₴₮ ₮ⱤɄ₴₮ ₥Ɇ, ɎØɄ'ⱠⱠ ฿Ɇ ₥Ł₦Ɇ ₴ØØ₦

- - - ᒪᓍᗩᕲᓰᘉᘜ - - - ᖴᓰᒪᘿ ᓍᘉᘿ - - - » ᖽᐸᘉᓰᐺᘿS ᓍᖇ ᕼᘿᗩᖇᖶS  ? ¿ » - - - ₭₦ŁVɆ₴ - - - ᖴᗩᓰᒪ - - - ᖇᘿᗷᓍᓍᖶ SᖻSᖶᘿᘻ - - - ᖇᘿᗷᓍᓍᖶ ᑢᓍᘻᕵᒪᘿᖶᘿ - ᓍᕵᘿᘉ ᖴᓰᒪᘿ ∆ - - - ᕲᓍᘺᘉᒪᓍᗩᕲᓰᘉᘜ

You sighed in dispair in the night air as you walked home. Once again, you were rejected in a job interview.

A few days ago you were fired from the job you actually liked. You couldn't understand why either. You didn't do anything wrong, you were quite hardworking and always finished the documents in time.

Your supervisor looked afraid, terrified even when he told you to immediately pack your bags and leave, and ever since you just can't seem to get in anywhere. Not even the gas station wanted you in charge.

" Well hello there. What do we have here." A creepy voice suddenly sounded from behind you.

You turned around only to be greeted by a man with a creepy smile and even creepier, eye lid-less eyes. He was holding a knife, making his intentions obvious.

You didn't need to think twice about his intentions and whipped your phone out of your pocket with the intentions to call the cops and running.

The killer sadly isn't stupid, and has you on the ground under him whitin seconds.

Your phone's screen crack and slides to the other side, the dialed number not pressed on call yet.

" Don't cry sweetheart. It doesn't suit your pretty face. Don't fret, I'll make sure, you'll smile forever. " The killer tells you happily.

Both of you don't realize that your phone screen suddenly lights up in a green colour. Nor does either of you realize the figure crawling out of it.

The both of you don't realize, until the killer is off you and tackled down on the ground beside you.

" I've told you before. She's fucking mine. Go bother someone else." Ben's voice sounds suddenly.

You turn your head to look at him.

This time he does not wear jeans and a sweater. No  this time, he looks like he came straight out of a... Video game? He looks like Link, the main personage of the game which your friend Noah had dropped off at your place around six months ago. 

Ben never told you he was into cosplaying.

Your ears suddenly tinted pink as you realized, he called you his. Suddenly you felt a little giddy, the guy you like so much might actually like you back.

The killer underneath Ben growls out something you can't hear before throwing the shorter off him and leaving.

" Are you okay?" You ask him.

He turns to you with red eyes.

Red. Fucking. Eyes.

And that's not the only thing about his eyes that changed.

Instead of the usual white eyes have, his are now black.

And even there it doesn't end.

There's blood running down his eyes onto his cheeks, as if he's crying blood.

You take a step back.

What the fuck is this?

" Don't be afraid! I know I look a little... Weird, but it's all just part of my..... Cosplay." He explains.

You ponder over it.

He's never gave you a reason to not trust you right? Or did he? 

You ignore the instinct to run away from him, instead choosing to calm down and follow your heart, which is telling you to trust him.

" Come with me. You can stay at my place tonight." Ben tells you, holding his hand out to you.

You take it.

₲ØØĐ ⱠŁ₮₮ⱠɆ ₱Ʉ₱₱Ɏ

- - - ᒪᓍᗩᕲᓰᘉᘜ - - - ᖴᓰᒪᘿ ᓍᘉᘿ - - - » ᖽᐸᘉᓰᐺᘿS ᓍᖇ ᕼᘿᗩᖇᖶS  ? ¿ » - - - ₭₦ŁVɆ₴ - - - ᖴᗩᓰᒪ - - - ᖇᘿᗷᓍᓍᖶ SᖻSᖶᘿᘻ - - - ᖇᘿᗷᓍᓍᖶ ᑢᓍᘻᕵᒪᘿᖶᘿ - ᓍᕵᘿᘉ ᖴᓰᒪᘿ ∆ - - - ᕲᓍᘺᘉᒪᓍᗩᕲᓰᘉᘜ - - - ᕲᓍᘺᘉᒪᓍᗩᕲ ᑢᓍᘻᕵᒪᘿᖶᘿ ›

It took longer than expected to reach his house. The whole road to his house is creepy. Ben appartly lives in this supermodern house in the woods.

Which is off already, the woods are known troughout the whole town as mystery. According to urban legends, there's creatures loving in there who shouldn't exist. Because of that, there's barely any people there. According to Ben, everything is all clear and safe, and you trust him with your heart.

You don't question him after his answer and instead follow him into the,indeed very,modern little house which is situated hidden behind the trees.

You get directly hit in the face with a copper scent as soon as you step foot into his house.

" Would you like something to drink?" He asks you as you enter his house, neither of you bothering to take your shoes off.

" Just water please." You tell him as you study the place.

The inside of the small house is more modern than the outside, with a big living space and an open kitchen. There's also three doors in the hallway.

One to the bathroom, one leading upstairs and one leading into the basement.

" Here you go." Ben returns, handing you a glass of water.

" Thanks, aren't you going to take off your make up and lenses?" You ask him.

His smile fades a bit, and for a moment you think you've accidentally offended him, but he nods with a pout before you can think about it twice.

" Yeah, that's probably a good idea. The livingroom is at the end of this hallway, feel free to make yourself comfortable." He smiles before going upstairs.

You stand still for a moment in the hallway as an eerie feeling suddenly starts crawling up your spine.

You ignore it, and instead start walking towards the livingroom.

Until the sound of something falling reaches your ears.

A sound that is directed from the basement.

Your first idea is to call for Ben, to alert him that you two probably aren't alone.

You don't do that however, because it could just be something falling off a shelf, right?

And so you decide to investigate it yourself.

As soon as you open the door to the basement, you're directly hit in the face with a very prominent copper scent. The same on you already smelled when you entered his house, except it's way too strong and there's something eerily familiar about it which you just can't pinpoint.

You silently push the door open, and turn on the lightswitch to the basement. Behind the door is a stony staircase, the rest of the basement is hidden away behind a wall. Curiosity takes over you, and you make your way downstairs before you can think about it twice.

As soon as you near the bottom, you spot blotches of red. The deep red substance is spread like a trail from he bottom stairs onto the rest of the room.

And then it clicks in your mind. It's blood. That's also the smell in the air. Was the intruder injured?

You step down the stairs while following the blood trail with you eyes.

You stumble back in fear and unpleasant suprise at the sight that greets you.

There's dead people down here. Most of which you don't recognise, but a few you do. 

You gasp as you look into a pair of wide blue eyes.

Sara.

She's sitting there, eyes wide open, with cuts all over. There's big ones in her rib case and near her organs, you can even see Intestines spread over the floor.

She's obviously dead.

But how come she's here?

Ben didn't do this? Did he?

Next to her is Jaime, who's eyes are closed but his chest is rising and falling.

He's alive.

You run over to him and shake him awake, not minding the blood that's now on your hands.

" Jaime! Please! Wake up!" You say desperately, tears now escaping your eyes.

" Y/N? Y/N! You have to get out of here. Ben, he's not who you think he is!" He tells you desperately.

" I'm not leaving you! Can you walk?" You ask him trough your tears.

" I'm chipped Y/N, you have to go. Get help. Ben's insane. He's a de-"

" Demon? Mass murderer? Failure? Dead? Is one of those what you wanted to tell her? How dare you lie to her! I'm none of those!" A voice suddenly booms trough the air.

You turn around while starting to shake. Jaime tries to hold you close to him with the little strength he has left. There Ben stands, still with red pupils and black eyes, dried red streaks still on his cheeks.

" Don't fucking touch her." Ben screams angrily, ripping you all but gently away from the male, causing you to tremble against him.

" Don't be afraid my love, he won't touch you again." Ben sushes you.

Is he really thinking that you're afraid of him?

" N-no. Let me go. Do-don't touch me." You tell him, pushing away from him.

He looks confused by your behavior.

" What's wrong baby? Please don't believe whatever lies he told you.-"

" What lies?! That you've killed my friend?! That you've killed these innocent people?! That you've chipped him?!" You yelled.

" They all deserved it Y/N! They're all in the way of our love!" Ben yells back desperately, stepping towards you.

" I don't even know these people!" You say, stepping back into the wall, knocking into a shelf.

You turn around to see what you knocked into.

Wait, is that the Nintendo 64?

" They all stared at you with sick twisted ideas! They really do deserve it." He tells you.

Suddenly it clicks in your mind.

" You're Ben from the game." You state.

He nods.

" Yes bu-"

" How?.."

" You clicked my game onto your computer remember."

" It was you wasn't it? You're the reason I've lost my job. You're the reason my friends all turned their back to me." You wishper, eyes now gathering in your eyes.

You've been so incredibly fucking stupid.

He's the reason your life has turned down the drain.

" Yes. But it's good right. Now we can finally be together." He says like a crazy man in love.

Which he is.

You start sobbing as you fall onto your knees realizing, all these people here. They've all died because of you.

" Hey, don't worry my live. We can now finally be together."

ɎØɄ'VɆ ₥Ɇ₮ ₩Ł₮Ⱨ ₳ ₮ɆⱤⱤŁ฿ⱠɆ ₣₳₮Ɇ, Ⱨ₳VɆ₦'₮ ɎØɄ?

 ᘜ ᗩ ᘻ ᘿ  ᓍ ᐺ ᘿ ᖇ.

[rowaning]

The Complete Fiction of HP Lovecraft rated by me, someone who read them all* but has a terrible memory

The Beast in The Cave: uh a guy goes on a cave tour and finds a creature that was like a human that got lost and adapted to its surroundings. 0/10 just because im pretty sure there was another one with this exact premise and neither of them were memorable at all.

The Alchemist: dude achieves immortality and lives in the narrators basement and has pledged to murder his entire lineage or something. 4/10 the alchemy stuff was actually kind of interesting

The Tomb: im pretty sure this is the one where a guy starts hanging out in a tomb and like travels back in time/becomes one of his ancestors? 5/10 if its the one im thinking of i did enjoy reading it

Dagon: guy lands on a mysterious island with signs of a long dead civilization. 1/10 i do not remember what happened in it

A Reminiscence of Dr. Samuel Johnson: 0/10 i have no memory of this

Polaris: also 0/10 i forgot all about it

Beyond the Wall of Sleep: could be any of the dream focused ones. if its the one about the dude sailing into the void or whatever than 4/10 not too bad

Memory: ironically, i dont remember it. 0/10

Old Bugs: 1/10 for the title god i wish i remembered this one

The Transition of Juan Romero: i got nothing. 0/10

The White Ship: this might also be the one about the dude sailing into the void? i liked that one he lived in a lighthouse and boarded a dream ship and just fucking left it was fun. 4/10

The Street: uh i think really steep street that didnt actually exist. 3/10

The Doom that Came to Sarnath: i wanna say another one of the dream centered ones where a town discovers some old relics and blatantly disrespects them and gets exactly whats coming to it. 5/10 they deserved what they got

The Statement of Randolph Carter: ok this dude shows up several times. i think this one is about how he returns to his childhood home then travels back in time and creates a time loop paradox thing. 1/10 meh

The Terrible Old Man: uh some thieves harrass a weird old guy and get got. 5/10

The Cats of Ulthar: someone is mean to a cat in a dream city, all of the rest of the cats get revenge and are revered for the rest of time. 2/10 (-3 because lovecraft has a specific name he gives to apparently every fictional and real cat he encounters and wow i wish he hadn't)

The Tree: i feel like this is something to do with a person becoming a tree but i cant actually remember. 0/10

Celephais: yeah no i got nothing 0/10

The Picture in the House: also nothing 0/10

The Temple: nope 0/10

Facts Concerning the Late Arthur Jermyn and his Family: is this the one where the dude's great grandfather married an ape? i dont think so but im not sure. 0/10, -5/10 if it is that one cause that one was especially shitty

From Beyond: nope 0/10

Nyarlathotep: charismatic dude shows up and is like get in bitches we're going to the void. i love nyarlathotep cause hes the one who directly interacts with humanity and like wears a human suit or whatever so hes just some dude whos like hey im gonna feed you to azathoth 5/0

The Quest of Iranon: got nothing 0/10

The Music of Erich Zann: narrator makes friends with an old musician whos being hunted by supernatural forces. 2/10 because i remember it but it was just ok

Ex Oblivione: 1/10 for the title but i have no clue what it was about

Sweet Ermengarde: lovecraft's sole attempt at comedy. not to my taste like at all 0/10

The Nameless city: nope 0/10

The Outsider: also nope 0/10

The Moon-Bog: sounds cool, dont remember it. 0/10

The Other Gods: dude tries to find the gods of humanity where they live on a big mountain, actually finds them, is immediately smited by the Other Gods who protect the gods of humanity. 3/10 he deserved it

Azathoth: dont recall, 0/10

Herbert West- Reanimator: Arkham man Herbert West and his assistant ressurect the dead with little thought to the consequences, then get murdered by a band of said resurrected dead. 5/10

Hypnos: nope 0/10

What the Moon Brings: also nope 0/10

The Hound: still nope 0/10

The Lurking Fear: again, nope 0/10

The Rats in the Walls: dude returns to his ancestral home, hears rats, excavates the basement and finds out that his ancestors ate human flesh, eats his friend. 1/10 it was an interesting read but can lovecraft please stop calling cats that.

The Unnameable: no clue 0/10

The Festival: nope 0/10

*Under the Pyramids: ok im pretty sure this is the one with houdini which is the only one i could not read. i went into this mentally prepared for lovecraft's bigotry but i was not mentally prepared for him dropping harry houdini, avid skeptic who absolutely would have beat the shit out of him for this, into the middle of his super racist paranormal horror. -1000/10

The Shunned House: nope 0/10

The Horror at Red Hook: also nope 0/10

He: cool title, no memory of the story. 0/10

In the Vault: wow im bad at this. 0/10

Cool Air: still no 0/10

The Call of Cthulhu: kind of all over the place, there was a thing about artists and then a thing about a cop investigating a cult. 3/10 meh but ill give it a bonus for being a staple of horror fiction.

Pickman's Model: uh artist sees some wild shit and draws it and then it eats him. 2/10 i forget the details

The Strange High House in the Mist: if this is the one im thinking of, dude does a dangerous climb to find a mysterious house and meet the inhabitant who is kind of interdimensional and also being hunted by interdimensional things. also maybe the house eats people? 2/10

The Silver Key: another Randolph Carter one, and i think this is actually the one about him travelling back in time so idk what the other one was. 3/10

The Dream-Quest of Unknown Kadath: randolph carter goes on a quest in the dream world to find the gods of humanity and ask why they wont let him check out this cool city he can see from his window. lots of action and very wordy and went a lot of different places. 4/10 good read but extremely xenophobic

The Case of Charles Dexter Ward: guy investigates his ancestor who looks disturbingly like him, ancestor comes back to life and kills him and takes his place and a bunch of other stuff happens. mostly a dramatized genealogical study. 3/10 not bad, very suspenseful

The Colour Out Of Space: meteor lands on a farm, scientists get weirded out by it, everything in the area gets weird then dead, alien thing gets enough power from draining nearby life-forms to escape earth. fun twist ending. 4/10 bonus for being one of the better ones, detraction for writing out a 'rural accent'

The Descendant: nope, 0/10

The Very Old Folk: nope again, 0/10

History of the Necronomicon: very dry. fake history of lovecraft's fake book thats super important to a lot of the stories. 0/10

The Dunwich Horror: isolated witchy family has a kid who no one likes that grows up real fast. graphic descriptions of renovation. a horror gets unleashed on the area and the local folklore scholars have to deal with it. 1/10 nothing good enough to counter the xenophobia

Ibid: i remember this one. no idea what it's deal was. pseudo-bibliography? it was weird. 0/10

The Whisperer in Darkness: guy has a correspondance with another guy about local folk legends based on evil crab things. other guy gets straight up replaced by an evil crab thing and first guy doesnt even notice. imagine if you followed up on a scam email and didnt realize anything was up until you saw that the face of the dude you were talking to in person was a mask. 4/10 for the comedy this guy would not last in the internet age at all

At The Mountains of Madness: guy whines about penguins and how awful it would be if there were civilizations that predated humanity. also commits grave desecration. i get hit by the realization that if lovecraft was less of a racist coward he wouldve made a great speculative sci fi author. 3/10 i would love to watch that old asshole get absolutely torn to shreds by the monster fucker community

The Shadow over Innsmouth: Fish People! Leave Them Alone! Or Else! 5/10 the protagonist gets to live the dream by escaping human society and becoming an immortal fish person

The Dreams in the Witch House: dude rents an objectively haunted room, doesnt listen to people trying to help him, gets murdered by a weird rat. later they find a shit ton of bones in the attic. 2/10 meh

Through The Gates of the Silver Key: Randolph Carter transcends time and space, then de-transcends time and space and immediately gets stuck on another planet in the distant past, makes a long and difficult journey back to earth to find that his estate is being divided amongst his heirs. the comedy potential of a man stuck in an alien body dealing with a legal system that has declared him dead is not examined. 2/10

The Thing on the Doorstep: narrator's good friend marries a fish person witch who steals his body. thats basically it. 3/10. at this point im like wow these narrators really refuse to believe the heavily foreshadowed supernatural explanations that turn out to be correct huh.

The Evil Clergyman: dude is in a room. some ghosts (?) show up. dude has a UV light for some reason. Gets his face stolen i guess and just has to live with it. 5/10 for being absolutely buck wild and refusing to explain anything

The Book: nope 0/10

The Shadow Out Of Time: dude gets his body stolen by ancient scholar species. agonizes about it for a while. finds archaeological evidence of said species. finds a book he wrote while living with said species. almost gets eaten by something. 3/10 more cool speculative sci fi but lame protagonist

The Haunter of the Dark: you'd think id remember it bc this was the last one and i read it last night. oh wait, nvm i do remember it. dude finds an old box in a run down culty church and unleashes a horror that then comes and fucks him up. 1/10 meh.

[cheri-translates]

[CN] Shaw’s 2020 Birthday R&S

🍒Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers for an R&S which has not been released in EN!🍒

[Prologue]

The birthday event begins with MC in an antique store, in search of a moderately priced antique. She had asked Shaw for help since she’s been having difficulties finding one

Unexpectedly, Shaw gives her the keys to an antique store the next day, telling her to take whatever she wants

Even though MC knew early on that Shaw used to have a mentor who owned an antique store, she still feels strange about it - she’s unable to associate antiques, which are filled with rich history and culture, with Shaw

She wonders if Shaw visited this antique store regularly in his childhood

She notices that a drawer is open:

There are several yellowed exercise books lying inside, and “Shaw” is written on the bottom right corner of the covers in pencil.

MC: Could these be Shaw’s exercise books when he was young?

Curious, I take out these “major discoveries” from the drawer, my mind whirring with countless questions.  

At the back of my mind, I have a feeling that this place has a special meaning to Shaw.

MC: Maybe, for Shaw’s birthday…

While I’m thinking, something else in the drawer attracts my attention.

There are three copper coins, the colours antique, under sheets of writing paper. Covered in dust, they seem to be calling out to me voicelessly.

~

[Chapter 1: Exam Results]

At 4pm on a Friday afternoon, the math teacher wraps up her final point and closes the lesson plan.

The black board is decorated with the homework for the weekend. The teacher pushes up her spectacles. There is a big stack of exam papers on the table. “Last week’s exam scripts have been marked. Come and take them when I call your name.”

“This time round, most of you have improved. Only one student did not pass.” She takes up the exam script at the very top, flips it open, her eyes sweeping across the last row of the classroom, stopping at the seat at the very corner.

“Shaw.”

Hearing his own name being read, Shaw unwillingly stuffs the interesting comics underneath the table, taking his time to stand up. At the same time, the whole class cannot help but turn around and look at him evenly.

Sensing the surprised and teasing looks in their eyes, Shaw instead raises his head high and walks forward, stuffing a hand into his pocket with a devil-may-care attitude.

Taking the exam script from the teacher, Shaw stands in place, flipping through the script to look at the questions he got wrong.

Well, he did get more questions wrong than expected…

But math itself as a subject is annoying. It’s fine if he doesn’t do well.

He folds the exam script, folds it again, and again, before stuffing it into his pocket, turning around to return to his seat.

The teacher’s eyes unhappily trail behind Shaw, before she once again talks in a serious tone. “This time, everyone has to have their parents sign the exam script. I’ll check them on Monday afternoon.”

Shaw raises his eyebrows in mild disdain. It’s just a signature after all.

The old man copies the calligraphy of the Tang and Song dynasties so perfectly that even experts cannot tell. A mere signature wouldn’t be difficult.

He retrieves the stack of comics from underneath the table and puts them into his bag. With sufficient preparation for the end of school, he waits for the end-of-class bell to sound.

~

[Chapter 2: After School]

Entering June, the cicadas grow increasingly chirpier.

Over 60 years old, the antique shop shopkeeper sits on a rocking chair, fanning himself while checking Shaw’s homework. The prescription of his reading glasses is too shallow, and he has to squint. “The way you write this… Why does it look like a dog crawling. It’s so crooked.”

Shaw takes an eraser to erase a sentence he has copied wrongly. He cleans it till there is not a trace of it left. In an elevated volume, he answers, “It doesn’t matter if the words look ugly as long as I didn’t write it wrongly.”

While saying this, he feels through his pockets and takes out two exam scripts. “My teacher says this one needs a signature.”

Taking the script from him, the shopkeeper laughs until he rocks back and forth. “Kid, it’s fine if you don’t score well, but your luck couldn’t be any worse. Even if you take wild guesses, you couldn’t have gotten such low marks.”

He sits upright, sighing a few times. He folds up his fan and takes out a ball-point pen from his front pocket. With a practiced motion, he signs them.

He sighs deeply. “Shaw, since I’m not your parent, I shouldn’t be teaching you anything.”

Shaw had just closed his pencil box with a “pa”. Hearing his mentor sigh, he takes out his exercise books from his bag again, before returning to a state of studying. “All right, all right, I know what you’re going to say…”

“I won’t talk about big life lessons. Your school teacher would have talked about it more than I have. From today onwards, apart from the homework your teacher has given you, you are to write two pages worth of math questions, and copy a short essay every day. Only after you’re done will I teach you my craft.” He stands up, holding a tea cup and walking towards Shaw. “Whether you agree or not, give me an exact answer.”

Shaw doesn’t make a sound but merely furrows his eyebrows.

The shopkeeper laughs. “Just look at your capabilities - even a math question can stump you. If you can’t handle this small difficulty, how can you think of yielding something big?”

“I’ve never found math difficult. I simply don’t like math.” Shaw sets aside his exercise paper and takes out a brand new sheet. “Next time, I’ll let you sign an exam script that has 100 marks.”

“Wow, look who’s ambitious.”  

“Hmph, this is nothing.”

~

[Chapter 3: After School]

There is only one class on Wednesday afternoon. After school, Shaw carries his bag and runs towards the shop.

Once he enters, he sees his mentor eating some kind of medicine – small white and yellow pills in his palm.

“Why are you here at this time? Oh it’s… I forgot, it’s Wednesday today.” The shopkeeper talks while he turns around to walk into the kitchen. “Put down your bag and wash your hands. I bought a big watermelon!”

Shaw knows the old man has high blood pressure, some heart issues… He doesn’t have a concept of these things, but knows that it isn’t something good.

Without a sound, he puts his bag down and takes out his exercise books and practice questions.

“Don’t rush to do your homework, come eat some watermelon first.” The shopkeeper puts half a watermelon into Shaw’s arms and guides him to the outside of the store, bringing two small stools over for them to sit.

The watermelon, which was just taken out of the fridge, glistens with water droplets. The red flesh has a spoon stuck in it. Shaw scoops a big chunk from the middle. It’s very sweet.

The shopkeeper is also holding half a watermelon, but eats very slowly. Noticing Shaw staring at him, he sighs and shakes his head. “I’m old, so I can’t just eat these cold things…”

While saying this, he looks towards the drawer inside the store. “Your mentor is 62 this year.”

“When people become old, they love to talk about reason. They don’t want you to walk the crooked path they have because it’s a waste of time. You’re still young, so you think you have a lot of time to spare, so you don’t notice. I want to teach you that this is wrong. You need to spend the time of walking down a crooked path to do other things.”

After saying this, he points towards the whole street lined with antique shops. “You can’t just look at these. Learning calligraphy and painting today, and tomorrow jade, and thinking you’re living a serious life. Spending months and years to take care of this palm-sized shop – You can’t live like this. You are my disciple, and I will teach you all my skills. But apart from this, you still have to learn other things. Whatever you can learn, learn it all, and learn it well.

“You have to look at the big world, craft a career, aim higher, be more forward looking…”

He looks at Shaw affectionately. “Put in more effort, learn all my skills, and then get out of here!”

Shaw turns towards the watermelon and lets out a glum “humph”. “You’re old, but I’m still young. I still can’t differentiate plus minus multiply and divide. You’re old so you should be the one putting in more effort to live for a long time, so I can take my time to learn all these things.”

It’s summer, so the night comes late. The clock already signals the time as 6pm, but the light has not yet dispersed.

Shaw puts a brush back into the drawer, takes off his gloves and wipes the sweat off his forehead. “Old man, I’m hungry. Why not let me join you for dinner?”

In the kitchen, the shopkeeper is washing vegetables. He takes out a small box from the fridge, pulls back the curtains and returns to the shop.

“I didn’t cook your portion, but you can eat this if you’re hungry.” He removes the cover of the small paper box, and Shaw’s eyes widen.

“What, you think I wouldn’t remember your birthday?” The shopkeeper retrieves a cake from the paper box, and removes the plastic surrounding it. “Once you’re done eating, go home quickly!”

Shaw takes a spoon, muttering in a small voice, “It doesn’t matter if I go home late anyway.”

“Today is different. A child’s birthday is the same day as a mother’s suffering… But you’re too young and still can’t understand this. On other days it’s fine, but today is different…” The shopkeeper holds up his tea cup and goes to the counter.

[Note: The actual phrase is: “儿子生日母亲的苦日”, which doesn’t have a direct English translation. The meaning is that the day a child is born is also the day the mother suffers in childbirth to bring him into the world]

“I don’t know why adults don’t have an issue with you hanging out here all the time. But I can tell that you wear clean clothes every day, and that your shoes are polished. These are because of your parents. Let this old man add one line of reason – if you’re angry with your parents, you’ll regret it eventually.”

Shaw lowers his head, biting the spoon and says evasively, “No one’s angry with them.”

“You don’t call this being angry? It’s not that I’m picking on you, but boys should manage their tempers better. If you’re unhappy, you have to say it straight out, don’t just keep it boiling in your heart without a sound and then wait for someone to come coddle you. With your personality, in future, you’ll become a person who never speaks from the heart. Even when you’re with someone you like, you’d put on a front – That wouldn’t be good.”

“Old man, what are you thinking all day long?” Shaw retorts, not bothering to clean his mouth which has been dirtied with cream. “I will never have someone I like. I play soccer with a few guys in class, and they spend the entire day talking about who they like. It’s so annoying.”

The shopkeeper laughs at how Shaw says this with an air of righteousness. “Which is why I say you’re still young.”

Shaw digs into his cake and lets out a “hmph”. “I’m not young. I just haven’t grown taller.”

The shopkeeper sips his tea. “Guys do take longer to grow. Maybe you’ll be taller than me in two years.”

“Two years is way too long,” the plastic spoon dangles from Shaw’s mouth. “The best thing would be to wake up one day and suddenly be taller. Mm… I want to grow to this height. No.”

He stands on a chair, using his hands to gesture until he is satisfied. “At least here.”

The shopkeeper responds with a sweeping gaze, “That’s 180cm though.”

“180cm is very good.” Shaw sits back on the chair contentedly. “I’ll make a wish to grow to 180cm.”

~

[Chapter 5: Fate]

The shopkeeper looks at the clock on the wall, and slowly puts down his teacup.

“Since it’s your birthday, I’ll read your fortune.” He pulls open the drawer and takes out three old copper coins.

Shaw finishes up the last bite of cake and throws the packaging into a bin. “You’ve already read my fortune many times and the results are always the same. Yet you’re doing it again?”

The shopkeeper looks slightly down, but his voice remains calm. “I have nothing else to do anyway.”

The first throw, one heads and two tails.

The second throw, one heads and two tails.

The third throw, two heads and one tails.

…It’s really not much different from the last reading.

The shopkeeper shakes his head, his hand ready for the fourth throw. The copper coins fall on the table with a jingle, and a combination which has never been seen before appears – all three are negative.

“Wow, there’s a change!” The shopkeeper says in a higher pitch than usual.

In the middle of downing his drink, Shaw almost falls off his chair at the shopkeeper’s sudden outburst.

The jingles from the copper coins continue. The final two throws are no longer the same ones as before.

Shaw looks at the coins. “What does this mean?”

“It means that in the future, you will definitely not always be alone.” The shopkeeper rubs Shaw’s head with a bright smile on his face. “I was always worried about what would happen to you, with such a stubborn personality, if I weren’t around anymore…”

“Of course I wouldn’t always be alone. I’m not alone now.”

Shaw puts the three copper coins in his hands, looking like he doesn’t take the reading to heart – He has his family, pretty good friends, a few friends from the neighbouring class who buy tidbits with him. His life will continue this way.

Even though it’s a little boring, but he wouldn’t be alone.

“Also, old man, you won’t have any problems, and will definitely live for a very long time.”

Shaw speaks, and softly repeats the sentence, “You will definitely live for a very long time.”

The dusk has begun to settle outside. The shopkeeper holds the copper coins between his fingers, and gently sighs. “That’s why I say you’re still young.”

~

[Chapter 6: Birthday Present]

After packing his bag, Shaw looks at the clock on the wall – he should reach home by 7pm, just in time for dinner.

“You’re leaving already? You don’t want your birthday gift?”

The shopkeeper appears from behind the counter, tossing his gaze to the cupboard. “It’s been there for a whole day and you still haven’t found it yet.”

Usually displaying antiques, the drawer now has within it a box wrapped in colourful paper. Shaw curiously walks over and rips off the packaging, revealing a small wooden box.

A dark brown Rosewood bracelet rests in his hand.

In his eyes, this is something only an adult can have.

At his age, he would have received books, stationery, toys or models – none of which he likes.

He is always treated like a child, but he has grown up since a long time ago.

“This bracelet isn’t something expensive, it isn’t that much of an antique, but it is made of quality Rosewood.”

“If you’re bored, you can play with this, and learn to manage your temperament. You’re still young, so it’s fine if you’re still impatient and stubborn. But if you continue with this little attitude of yours, you’d lose out eventually.”

“In this line of work, you need to have patience. One, only when you manage your emotions would you remain focused. Two, good things come to those who wait.”

“The change in your life is also something you will have to wait for.”

These words completely fly over Shaw’s head. He puts the bracelet onto this wrist, coils it around multiple times until it can stay on.

“In future, no matter what you face, you have to be calm, and be patient.” The shopkeeper gently taps Shaw’s head, and frowns. “Have you committed all this to memory?”

Shaw rubs his head, his eyes still trained on his present, completely engrossed with it. “Ahh – yes I remember, I remember!”

“What do you remember?”

“Remember… that I have to hurry home for dinner!” Shaw turns around and grabs his bag, disappearing out of the shop. Before that, he raises the hand that dons the bracelet and waves.

The stars flicker, and the light is reflected in Shaw’s eyes. His eyes are smiling.

[evolsinner]

⊱┊30

i don't need 'looking after'! i am perfectly capable of taking care of my own damn self. from the moment kayrem has walked back into our lives, he's been showing off. he's trying to prove his 'worth' to the family, and it's annoying the heck out of me!

first, he takes me away from isaac against my will, then he does this elaborate show of how much he still has an effect on me. i mean, the only reason i called him is that there was no one else to call!! and now he's brought a fucking dog for maxi? sucking up to father? it's not fair! he just doesn't get to be gone for this long and then have the easiest welcome back party.

i hate him!

after grumpily hopping out of the shower, i crash straight into bed. mum's doing overtime which means i'll get to see her first thing in the morning. this is good because i'm still figuring out what to say to her.

my parents always change roles, either one of them is too mad and the other is understanding or vice versa. so i guess she’s gonna be playing the ‘mad’ role tomorrow.

i slide out of bed and creep down the hallway, pausing at the source of the problem…in me.

"what are you doing?" i push the door further in.

without looking up from his crouching position, kayrem’s like, “the dvd player is jacked up. i'm tryna get it to work," and takes a gulp from his redbull.

"can't you wait till tomorrow to do it?"

"tomorrow can wait."

ugh, i never seem to make sense of his comebacks like these. just answer properly, jeez. "what are you tryna watch anyway?"

"get in the bed and you'll see," he grins.

the fuck? wait... i mean, i do kinda need to tell him something so..

"oh, and, shut the door. make sure to lock it too."

"'lock it'?" i stand there nervously.

"we don't want anyone walking in."

huh?

"if one of those scenes happen to come on," he adds like an afterthought.

"oh..." i shut the door and crawl into his bed, sitting up and crossing my legs. "why not just netflix and chill? that dvd player is pretty old; i don't think you can get it to work." i immediately shut my mouth, realising what i said could be taken the wrong way too.

he quits messing about with the player and looks over his shoulder at me with an amused frown, "huh?"

"i meant, like, watch a movie on the laptop. not..y'know. like, literally only a movie and nothing else."

"fine, i suppose you do have a point," he turns off the tv and dvd player before grabbing the laptop and climbing into bed with me. "fuck,” he taps away at the keys, “forgot it was flat.”

"can you just sleep with me instead?"

he raises his eyebrows, surprised.

"next to me! n~not with me!" i quickly clarify before laying down, all red and hot.

i hear the lid of the laptop shut, followed by a swift motion of a shirt being pulled off. the bed dips as a body lies down behind me. gradually, i feel warmth shifting closer to me and the smell of red bull breath. like magnets, we stick together. a hand weaves its way underneath my shirt and i tense up.

"relax," he coos.

his fingers trace over my mini love handles, nearing my belly button. i don't know if i want him to go higher or lower. slightly, i back up into him, rubbing my ass in circular motions on his dick. a grunt leaves his mouth, his hot breath hitting my nape. my respiration elevates and the follicles on my forearms stand up.

"sorry," i sigh.

"don't be. if you like it, keep doing it."

i back up into him further and rest my ass on his bulge. his hand goes higher, tracing the side of my boob, to my underboobs, then to the other side; forming a 'w' in the process.

"you're not wearing a bra.”

"..they're uncomfortable."

he slowly goes up the slopes of my boobs and runs his thumb over my tits, kneading them for a while. "you like this?"

"mhm.."

"how about this?" he skims his hand all the way down to the top of my panties.

i turn a little on my back and buck my hips up, desperately inching my body closer to his fingertips. he inserts his hand and goes past the stubble to reach my throbbing clit. now i can feel the pressure of his dick getting erect and also his hand on my pussy.

"here?" his finger hovers.

"y..yes.."

he tenderly presses down and a moan escapes my mouth.

"you're so sensitive, babysis," he whispers. "i haven't even started."

he rubs my button in a figure 8 which makes me squirm like a worm. his fingers slide in between my moist folds, massaging me, as they go back up again to torture my clit.

"kayrem, please, in..in me."

he puts his mouth next to my ear, "how many?"

"as many as you can fit.."

"on one condition, you have to call me by my middle name from now on, sis."

knots get created in my stomach. knots and crosses. clusters and ravels. memories and misery. no, this cannot be happening again. i was here to talk to him, not play with him.

"stop.”

"what?"

"lavanda," i pull his hand out, "i'm sorry."

he doesn't say anything, but i can tell he's not that happy. i turn to face him. he's lying on his back with an arm crossed behind his head, in a pensive mood. there's a sense of nostalgia dancing in his distant expression as he stares out the skylight. i cuddle up to him, laying an arm and a leg over his torso.

“missed my room,” he murmurs melancholically.

“yeah, think i liked it better as a guest room.”

“shut up,” he rolls his eyes. "…why did you come back, marie?"

"i have something to tell you."

he glances at me curiously with those hazel eyes. how can i get lost in them when i have the exact same colour? his other sleeveless arm lingers over the blanket. i shift closer to him so that my body gently presses into his. he’s warm.

"i'm pregnant."

nothing but tensive as hell silence fills the room.

finally, kayrem exhales loudly, his stomach deflating and my arm lowering with the motion. "why the fuck are you telling me that?" he shoves me away. "i don't care about the shit you do with him. i also don't appreciate you bringing his shit back here."

"your shit."

"what?" he faces me with a blank expression.

"it's yours."

he opens his mouth to say something, but nothing comes out.

i sit up criss~cross applesauce. "that night when we did it, i..i haven't gotten my.." i clear my throat and start again. "i haven't gotten my..my.. ugh, sorry," i apologise, picking at my cuticles.

"it's okay. you can tell me. i’m your big brother," kayrem leans up on his elbow and stops me from fidgeting.

"i haven't gotten my period since. isaac said that he could deal with me being.." i gesture with my eyes to my tummy, "but he doesn't know that it's yours. and if he did, i don't know what he'll think of me. i just thought you should know before i did anything.”

“i..uhh…” kayrem scratches the back of his head. "do you know how far along you are?"

i shake my head.

"have you been to the doctors?"

i shake my head again.

"jesus, marie, have you done anything for it?"

no…

"i'm taking you to the docs tomorrow, i don't care," and he slumps back down.

"what, no!"

"you're going."

"i'm not!"

"like, hell."

"for fuck's sake!" i throw my hands up in the air. "i'm not keeping it, okay!”

he glares at me, trying to remain pragmatic, "i'm pretty sure this is the hormones talking, not you."

"don't you dare blame this on the hormones!"

"fine then," he spits out, "why even tell me all this when you could've gotten rid of it back there?! huh!?"

"because you had the right to know,” i murmur sadly.

he closes his eyes and shakes his head with a sigh, "you don't have to get rid of it because of how it came to be. it's selfish..heedless."

i shrug.

“if you’re worried about mother and father, don’t be. as long as i’m here, nobody can hurt you.”

yet he hurts me from simply uttering those weighty words.

"you can still give it up, but don't kill it.”

"we need to… incest and stuff. it’ll look like an alien.”

“incest or love?”

“i don’t love you, loser.”

“listen, we made the risk the moment we decided not to use..” he stops himself, clearly agitated. “anyways, the point is, marie, you're not a killer. you're nowhere close to being like him."

“what did you say?”

"nothing.”

“no, you said something, tell me.”

“dang it," kayrem rolls his eyes frustratedly. "i wasn't supposed to say anything till morning."

"what are you talking about?"

"hey," he grips my hand softly. "c’mon, let's go to sleep."

"no," i snatch my hand back. "i don't want you touching me right now."

he scoffs, "for real?"

i stare at him.

“whatever, get some sleep," and he turns on his other side, throwing the blanket over himself.

"i hate you, kayrem, i really do."

no answer.

i was about to leave his stupid room when the door sways open quietly.

"rosé, are you in here?" maxi's fragile voice wonders.

"buddy, what's up?" kayrem lifts his head up.

"wasn't talkin' to you," maxi mumbles.

"maxi, what happened?" i ask him.

"rosé," he says with relief when he hears my voice, "i..i had a nightmare and it was... it was..." he breaks into tears before having the chance to finish his sentence.

"naw, baby, come here," i hold my arms out.

"it was really scary!" he squeals and runs to me.

"it was just a nightmare, maxi, a bad dream," i console him, wiping his tears away. "it's not real. you have nothing to worry about, i promise."

"can i sleep with you guys, please?" he asks innocently.

“let’s go to my room, okay?”

"of course," kayrem grips my arm. "jump in, maximus. you can sleep in the middle, between me and marie."

"the... the house was on fire," maxi lays down, and i pull the covers over him. "i couldn't find you, rosé. i couldn't find mummy or daddy or kayrem too. when i looked out the window, i saw all of you standing there and smiling at me."

"jesus..." kayrem mutters.

"you know us, maxi," i sweep his locks to the side. "we would never leave you if the house was ever on fire. that wasn't us in your dream. they just looked like us."

"but you left me ~ twice, already."

i have trouble replying, sorta embarrassed, and give kayrem a glance.

"hey, bud, it was just a nightmare, alright?" he decides to step in for me. "nightmares can scare you, but they can't hurt you."

"see, you're safe with us," i add. "now go to sleep," i kiss him on the forehead. "kayrem and i will make sure the monsters can't come and get you."

"yeah, lil bro, your sister and i...we have our ways," he sends me a wink.

ew.

maxi nods, sobbing in my chest, and tries to fall asleep.

"what the fuck kind of movies have you been letting him watch lately?!" i hiss at kayrem.

"just an ep or two of supernatural," he informs me. "didn't think it'd be that bad."

"you didn't think..??" i shake my head in irritation. "you're such an idiot..!"

after 10 minutes or so, i can hear little snores coming from maxi.

kayrem puts his arm across maxi and rests the hand at the end of it on my waist. "kinda like seeing you like this," he whispers. "all protective of him. turns me on...a little."

i punch his shoulder, "nothing's gonna happen between you and i with him here. now shush, you're gonna wake him."

with my eyelids closed, the scent of red bull breath comes even closer, and before i know it, a pair of wet lips have enveloped over mine. i am caught a bit off guard because, like, our little brother is with us, and what if he wakes up? however, this doesn't seem to bother my big brother in the slightest.

there's something mellow about the kiss. it makes me feel safe and sound. i try not to make a sound or get lost in it, but i'm kinda losing it already. he tastes of sin, taurine and the colour red if red had a taste. he sticks his hand under my shirt, egging me on. we're both lowkey squishing burrito maxi in the process.

"fuck, stop, stop..!" i quickly retract.

"he's asleep," kayrem says calmly. "he ain't seein' nothin'," and attempts to find my lips again.

"i don't care. goodnight."

a moment later, kayrem snuggles his head inches away from mine and is like, "this could be us, you know. keep it, please.”

[lakesandquarries]

Jump the Fence Part Two: Ghost Out Of His Grave

chapter two: ghost in your arms

summary: Benrey and Gordon adapt to living together. Some days are better than others.

notes: series title from “jump the fence” by mother mother. this part and the chapters within it are named after “ghosting” by mother mother.

AO3 Link

Benrey manages half an hour of lying on the couch before he finds himself in Gordon’s room. He’s still reeling from everything that just happened, rolling Gordon’s apology around in his mind over and over again, like a looping video he can’t pause. He hadn’t prepared for that as a possibility. He’d been expecting to end the night tied to the couch, or hiding in a dumpster, or dead.

Gordon had hugged him. That had seemed like such an unrealistic outcome that he hadn’t even let himself daydream about it.

He looks peaceful when he’s asleep. Does Benrey look like that? Or is it just another thing that’s special about Gordon? His curly hair is spread around his head, like a messy brown halo. The angel one, not the game. He’d looked more like the other kind of halo when they were in Black Mesa, but Benrey hasn’t seen his armor at all since they ended up in his house. Here, Gordon just wears t-shirts and jeans and stuff. He seems kinda...softer, somehow.

Or maybe Benrey’s just tired and imagining things.

He tiptoes across the room quietly, sliding onto the bed as carefully as he can. It shifts under his weight, but Gordon doesn’t wake up, so Benrey climbs on. It’s a lot comfier than his couch is. Gordon’s got some kinda thick fluffy blanket on top, with the really soft kind of texture Benrey likes.

Gordon won’t mind if he curls up, right? He’s not gonna sleep or anything. Just. Hang out, for a little. Be gone before Feetman even wakes up.

Benrey makes himself comfortable, and before he knows it, he’s asleep.

---

He wakes up to movement, something nudging him. Blinking his eyes open, he sees a grumpy looking Gordon staring at him.

Aw fuck.

“G’morning,” he mumbles, attempting to stretch and nearly rolling off.

Gordon snorts. “Why’re you on my bed?”

Benrey rolls back so his face is buried in the blanket. “Mmm. Comfy.”

“Yeah, fair point,” Gordon says. Something soft hits Benrey. He lifts his face to see Gordon’s thrown the covers back. “Any other reason?”

“Mmmb,” Benrey says again. Gordon sighs.

“Right.” He grabs a hair tie off his nightstand, pulling his hair into a ponytail. Benrey can see the streaks of gray hiding under the brown. Sexy. “Dude. Is there a reason you’re staring at me?”

“Can we go somewhere?” Benrey blurts out.

“Wha?”

“Uh.” They hadn’t actually planned to ask that. Shit. Benrey looks away, staring at Gordon’s half open dresser, clothes hanging off awkwardly. “Weren’t we gonna like...get me stuff?”

“Oh, yeah,” Gordon says. “Shit, I forgot about that. You wanna go to Target?”

Benrey has never heard of Target before in his life. “Tarjet,” he says.

“Okay well, let me get dressed first,” Gordon says, standing up. “Benrey. That means leave. ”

“Right,” he mutters, slinking off into the living room, where he waits perched on the couch, picking at a loose thread on his shirt. The prospect of going outside suddenly seems very, very scary. He hasn’t left Gordon’s apartment since he showed up. The closest he’s gotten to going outside has been standing in front of an open window. And in Black Mesa…

He’s not thinking about that.

Gordon steps out of the bedroom. He shoots Benrey a smile as they scoot off the couch, grabbing his keys out of the bowl he keeps next to the door.

Outside of the apartment are more hallways. It’s a little reminiscent of the Black Mesa dorms, but less ugly. Gordon leads Benrey down the hall, to a door with a bright red EMERGENCY sign over it. “Shortcut,” he says by way of explanation, and then he pushes the door open and -

And -

Holy shit.

He’s been outside Black Mesa before. Sorta. Technically. He has stepped out of the building and seen the desert that surrounds it, the brown dust and brown rocks and brown sky.

The sky is blue here. The grass is green, and so are the trees, and there’s cars going down the street in a million different colours and Benrey can’t do anything besides stare.

“Woah,” he mumbles, kneeling down to touch the grass. It’s damp, and when he pulls on it the dirt underneath is a rich brown, nothing like the dull dust of Black Mesa.

“Hey man, c’mon, leave the grass alone. What are you doing?”

Right. Right, Gordon’s here, Gordon’s watching him - he glances over and Gordon is squinting at him, like Benrey’s doing something weird. He stands up quickly, dusting himself off.

“Uhhhhh. Making sure the grass passes inspection,” Benrey says.

“Right,” Gordon says. “Can I ask you something?”

Benrey blinks. “You just did.”

Gordon rolls his eyes. “You know what I mean.”

“Uhhh. Sure?”

“Have - have you ever been out of Black Mesa before?”

His tone is - not angry. The rare soft tone he gets sometimes but never really talks to Benrey with. Genuine curiosity.

It wouldn’t be a lie, to say yes. Technically. He’s stepped outside!

But...that was still Black Mesa property. Even Xen - it was basically part of Black Mesa, at that point. And Benrey knows what Gordon’s trying to get at. He stares up at the sky, the bright blue sky and the fluffy white clouds and the sun that hurts his eyes.

“No,” he says.

“Oh,” Gordon says, and then he goes quiet for a moment. “I could…show you around, if you want. After we go to Target.”

Gordon’s eyes are nice in the sun. Benrey never really got a good look in Black Mesa, between the helmet and the bad lighting and the getting killed. Up here, his eyes are green, with a ring of brown in the center, like the bright green grass with the dirt underneath.

“Uhhh. Yeah, sure. If you wanna.” Benrey shoves their hands in the pockets of their sweatpants, and Gordon smiles at him, and it hurts his eyes like the sun did.

“Cool,” Gordon says, and then he reaches forward and grabs Benrey’s hand.

Gordon’s hand is warm. His skin doesn’t have the chill Benrey’s does, or the gray-ish tint. Everything about Gordon is warm and brown, from his hair to his skin to his eyes, and his hand is soft and his nails are painted orange to match his prosthetic and he’s still smiling even as Benrey stands there staring.

It’s only when Gordon pulls his hand away that Benrey realizes they’ve moved. They’re in front of a car now - Gordon’s, presumably - and Gordon seems to be expecting Benrey to do something.

“Dude. Get in. I know you know how to get into a car.”

Wordlessly, Benrey pulls the door open, scrambling in. Gordon gets in on the other side, giving a glance to Benrey - and then suddenly he’s leaning across them to buckle them in, arm brushing against Benrey’s chest.

“C’mon, seatbelts are one of the laws I agree with,” Gordon huffs.

404, Benrey not found. Benrey.exe has crashed. Would you like to reboot?

“You - you, you agreeing with laws? Laws are - laws’re for losers.” The words catch on his teeth, barely coherent even to himself. Gordon clicks the seat belt in and gives him a sidelong glance.

“You okay?”

“Uh-huh,” Benrey says, pulling their beanie down over their face.

“...Right,” Gordon says. The car engine makes a growling noise, and Benrey pushes his beanie back, leaning against the window. Gordon’s a better driver than Bubby. Probably? He hasn’t spent a lot of time in cars. But Gordon seems to know what he’s doing, turning on the radio and humming along mindlessly as they drive. Benrey can’t help but glance over at him every few minutes, even as most of his attention is focused on the world outside. It’s bright and colourful and there’s so many people . And he’d thought Black Mesa was crowded.

The car stops. “We’re here,” Gordon announces, cutting the music off. When Benrey glances over, Gordon’s eyebrows are scrunched up, squinting a little. “Are you sure you’re good?”

“Whu?”

“I mean is this gonna be like…” He runs a hand through his ponytail. “You just said you’ve never been outside Black Mesa. This has to be like, a lot for you.”

Benrey shrugs. “‘s fine. I’m - I’m a great cool, bro. I’ll be chill.”

Gordon stares a moment longer. “Okay. But, uh, tell me if it gets too much? And don’t -” he pauses, rubbing his face. “Don’t start shit or anything. Don’t try to, I don’t know, don’t start shapeshifting in the middle of Target. And no Sweet Voice! No - no weird magic shit or whatever.”

“‘s not magic ,” Benrey grumbles.

“Whatever it is! None of that, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah.” He folds his arms, huffing. “Never let me have any fun.”

“I’m just trying to not get us kicked out, man.” Gordon opens the door, stepping out - and a second later, opens Benrey’s door.

“I can get out myself,” Benrey whines, as Gordon leans over him again. He freezes.

“You seemed like you were having a hard time getting in, so…” Gordon steps back. “Benrey?”

“Hh,” Benrey says. He forces himself out of the car and to his feet. “You gotta - you gotta warn me, bro.”

“Warn you of what?”

“When you’re gonna - “ he reaches out, flicking Gordon’s shirtsleeve.

“Oh. Uh, yeah, I can do that. Look, let’s - lets go inside?”

[choicesenthusiast]

We need to have a chat.

For months, now, has Choices been progressively getting worse, and 99% of readers on this site collectively agree- and are very unhappy- that this is the direction that the game is headed in. So I just want to touch on some things that have bothered me and plenty others recently.

Let me just say this, before you all come at me. I love this game. It got me through a lot of tricky times in my life. It sounds dramatic, but it did give me something to look forward to every week. Now, though, there are plenty of issues I want to discuss.

These are personal opinions, so do not “attack” me if you disagree. It’s a long post, so feel free to scroll by. However, I felt these topics were too important not to pass over and practically wrote a whole essay, so I know it’s worth reading.

First, let’s talk about the books. More particularly, the quality of them. I get that the writers are trying, I really do. I don’t blame them. I blame the higher-ups. But most of the newer books are the same quality of Home for the Holidays when that was originally released, but now our standards have lowered so drastically that it’s normal for us. Almost every chapter has been a letdown, with a few noticeable exceptions.

Not to mention the content in some of the books. I am going to call them out specifically, so if you’re offended easily, get away from this post. Bachelorette Party, for instance, is a book that is significantly more inappropriate than most. Many innuendos, art, and terms/phrases not used in the early days of this game. It’s happened in Bloodbound, and also in The Royal Heir, and countless other books. Sure, write what you wan’t, I don’t care, just make it good. BUT. I’ve mentioned it before, and I’ll do it again. This app is rated for users ages 12+. That means literal children could be playing this game. This is so wrong. If you’re to write explicit content, at least make it known before young people fall into this trap of suggestive material.

Sunkissed is more boring than a wet mop, and PB is looking to release a few more books with similar energies and premises as if they don’t know that it’s one of their worst books. The Royal Heir is more Big Sky Country than Big Sky Country, when the whole idea of the book was to introduce an heir. Red Carpet Diaries is so forgettable that I forgot it existed. I could go on and on, nitpicking all of the books, but my point is that the quality of the books have declined so much since initial release, and the collective nobody is satisfied with it.

Secondly, let’s discuss the treatment of the characters. I am really grateful for the artists at PB. They’ve done a fantastic job with creating these characters and scenery that we know and love (mostly). What I’m not grateful for is the way that the writers are treating them, especially the minorities. And I know, I know, they’re fictional and that they have their own personalities and stuff. But the way they treat them also reflects the way they look at people in real life. Most female characters are cast aside in favour of the males. LGBTQ+ characters are dismissed and written off as heteronormative. Characters of colour are stereotyped. As an Asian female, I find it so rude and discriminatory, and quite frankly, disgusting. What’s worse is that PB claims to represent all people, but blatantly “represent” them stereotypically and disregard it once again every time people bring it up. Reusing Open Heart MC’s face for 5 books in a row is also lazy and uninspired. I understand the cost and effort of creating custom characters for every book, but after at least 2, much less 5 times, is where we draw the line. This also needs to stop.

Finally, let’s talk about reader satisfaction. PB obviously knows it has quite the audience. With the tag trending on Tumblr almost every week, 75k followers on Instagram, and an army of middle-aged moms on Facebook, it’s safe to say that this is a very popular game. It will be hard to satisfy everyone’s needs. But PB needs to understand that if at least two thirds of their fanbase is unhappy with the outcome of content, they have to do something about it. First it was representation. Forced romance. Pumping out more crappy books rather than a few good ones. Shoving all releases to the back end of the week instead of evenly spacing them out. Now changing the key wait time to three hours and diamond rewards back to one per chapter with no benefit to anyone? Sometimes I get where they’re coming from, but it’s too much mistakes. What’s worse is that PB tries to apologize for it and promises positive change, but then goes back and changes nothing, thusly making more readers unhappier.

On the other hand, some readers have completely crossed a line. Threatening PB because of crappy content, and other such actions are so immoral and inappropriate and although they’re not completely satisfying our wants, they are still human beings, after all. We also need to realize that they are trying to make us like their creations, and albeit misguided, they want the best for their app, whatever they may think that it be.

That’s what it is. The disregard of their fanbase’s wants, the dismissal of the change in their content, the “truths” and the empty promises. I make it sound dramatic, but it’s true.

All in all, I just wanted to put my thoughts out there, as they’ve been sitting in my head for a while. For those of you saying just stop playing it, I don’t want to. I genuinely feel that PB can bounce back from this, if they wake up and see the shit they’ve created. I know this is usually a chill blog but it was time to be serious for once. I hope you all agree with me, and I hope that things will get better.

@playchoices, I hope you see this and change for the better.

[luthienebonyx]

Can I have B, K and Q for the fanfic ask meme, please?

Fanfic ask meme

B: Any of your stories inspired by personal experience?

My stories come from the characters first, but there is also stuff in them that comes from personal experience. The Aussie coffee verse is set in some very specific places that I have visited more than once in the past. The Personal Touch takes a little from my own experiences with various kinds of physical therapy (though I never had that sort of relationship with any of my therapists!). In the past I’ve written stories that included stuff like bodysurfing, which I know about from growing up by the beach. There are other little bits and pieces of personal experience littered through my fic, but they’re generally not anything particularly important.

I guess History Never Repeats has potentially the biggest part of my real life in it, because I’ve given Brienne the profession that used to be mine, a long time ago. That was inspired partly because lately I’ve been encountering fiction in various media that keeps portraying that profession as the most boring job in the world/a cover for something ‘more interesting’/something done by unhinged megalomaniacs before they go completely off the rails. And yes, while I have met the odd unhinged megalomaniac in that profession, I wanted to present it in a more true way - so we’ll see what happens as the story progresses!

K: What's the angstiest idea you've ever come up with?

In my reply to one of the other asks, I mentioned that I’d written a major character death in a HP fic, long, long ago. That was The Rain Keeps Falling. I doubt anything I’ve written since tops that in the angst stakes, though one or two things have come close. When it was originally posted on LJ, it got several pages of comments that were pretty much all variations on: Your story made me cry. Still proud...

Q: Do you have any discarded scenes/storylines/projects?

Oh, loads of them. Most are handwritten in notebooks, but just a quick look through my googledocs shows ones I may yet get to, like the rockstar/musician AU, and ones I’d forgotten all about, like “angry sex draft” - whatever the hell that was supposed to be. Here is a bit from a half-written Rivers of London story called Stripping Off, which will never be finished because the canon has now moved on from the moment in which the story is set:

Nightingale always dresses well, in a strictly first-half-of-the-twentieth-century kind of way. It was one of the first things I noticed about him, that night we met in Covent Garden, and not just because, as a police officer, I’m trained to notice distinguishing details just in case they might be needed later. I thought he was going to try to pick me up, if I’m being honest. And it turned out I was right that he had an interest in me, but not in the way I thought.

He was wearing one of his beautifully tailored suits the first time I saw him, a bespoke number courtesy of Dege & Skinner, Savile Row, established 1865 - like all of his suits and most of his shirts, as I later found out. The perfect fit of his suits draws subtle attention to the width of his shoulders before nipping in closely at the waist. His shoes are handmade, because of course they are, by Crockett & Jones in Jermyn Street, which is handily situated just a few streets away from Savile Row and has been in business nearly as long as Dege & Skinner. And he carries a silver-topped cane, which fits the whole pre-war man about town aesthetic, but its origins and uses are… well, let’s just say that those are a bit more esoteric.

Nightingale’s entire look, not forgetting his Burberry coat, was more than familiar to me by the time I’d spent a year or two at the Folly, so I’m really not sure why his new driving gloves came as any sort of surprise – but they did.

Gloves of all sorts are a necessary evil in our line of work, but of course Nightingale’s driving gloves were nothing like anything that comes as police standard issue. They were made of thin, high quality brown leather, very supple, with ventilation holes along the knuckles, and lined with some sort of soft wool fabric – probably cashmere. But the day came when the quality of the materials and workmanship couldn’t disguise how well-worn Nightingale's gloves were. Not even Molly’s careful ministrations could make them look even remotely at their best, so eventually Nightingale bit the bullet and ordered – probably from some fifth generation family business with an ampersand in its name – a new pair of driving gloves.

I didn't even know that Nightingale had finally got… I'm sorry, procured, the new gloves until the first time we took the Ferrari for a spin, the one that used to belong to the practitioner formerly known as the Faceless Man and recently revealed to be one Martin Chorley. I'd been itching to take the Ferrari for a test drive since the moment it was impounded in the garage at the Folly, awaiting 'evaluation'. Nightingale still hardly ever lets me drive his Jag by myself, though - one of these days I'll actually get to the top of the priority list for that advanced driving test, but I'm not holding my breath - so I didn't bother asking if there'd be any chance that I could take the Ferrari out without him. Fortunately, he was almost as keen as I was to find out what the Ferrari could do.

I was vaguely aware that Nightingale was wearing his new gloves when he turned the key in the ignition, but at the time most of my attention was on the way the engine effortlessly purred into life. Russell Square isn't exactly the best place to drive, well, anything, let alone a Ferrari, so I waited as patiently as I could while Nightingale negotiated the London traffic and pointed us in the general direction of Oxford.

We were on our way to visit Professor Postmartin, a typical, even stereotypical Oxford don in every way, except that he moonlights as the official archivist for the Folly. He'd phoned the day before to let us know that he'd discovered some uncatalogued volumes in a hat box in a forgotten cupboard at the top of a cobwebbed spiral staircase - or somewhere like that - and he wanted us - well, Nightingale - to take a look at them.

"There's no great rush, Thomas. You can look them over the next time something brings you up to Oxford," Postmartin said.

Nightingale and I exchanged a look at that - he had speakerphone turned on, wonder of wonders, though it's possible he'd just hit the button by mistake - and decided without a word being said that the Ferrari was the thing that would bring us to Oxford.

The thing about being a passenger in a Ferrari? It's totally different to driving one. Those cars were designed for speed before anything else, which means a stiff suspension, thin tyres, and cutting back on extraneous extras like much in the way of padding beneath the beautifully finished black nero leather upholstery. All of which is fine if you're sat behind the wheel and feeling the thing rumble into life beneath your hands, and then having it do your bidding with every tiny change of course. But when you're in the passenger seat you feel it rumble to life beneath your arse, and you feel every. single. dip and pothole.

Apparently, my idea of patience is somewhat different from Nightingale's, because we hadn't even made it as far as the M40 when he glanced at me and suggested that perhaps I could find some way of keeping myself occupied on my phone until we got out of London.

I realised I'd been drumming my fingers on the leather-lined passenger door, and hastily returned my hand to my lap, trying to look the picture of innocence. It turns out that I'm no better at that than I am at pretending to be patient, because Nightingale snorted - actually snorted! - softly before he returned his attention to the road.

I really was intending to do what Nightingale had 'suggested', and I shifted in the seat so that I could reach into my pocket for my phone, but just as I did, Nightingale's arm moved and caught my eye - and I forgot to breathe.

I honestly didn't know why. I'd seen Nightingale drive before, many times. It should have been such an ordinary movement that I didn't even consciously register it, but his hand flexed as it closed around the gear stick and I swallowed. Hard. I probably should have looked away then. Okay, I definitely should have looked away then, but instead I took my first proper look at Nightingale's new driving gloves.

The new gloves were similar to the old ones, except in every way that they weren't. They were soft, high quality leather, and covered his hands as if… well, they had been made for him,  but where the old ones were a worn brown, these were midnight black. At least, they were on the part that covered the back of his hand. Underneath, on the palm, they were smooth red leather. Not the fire brick red of the Ferrari's paint job; Nightingale wouldn't be caught dead wearing such a flashy colour. No, the leather of the gloves was a few shades darker than the red of the Ferrari, but there was no denying that the new gloves fitted this car - just as the old gloves had been a perfect fit with the brown leather upholstery and wooden trim in the Jaguar, I realised.

And damn, did they fit Nightingale.

I choked on the thought in utter horror before I even got to the end of it, and quickly turned it into a coughing fit. I hadn't really… had I? About my governor? About Nightingale?

"Everything all right, Peter?" Nightingale asked in mild concern.

I nodded, my eyes watering as I croaked out a not very convincing, "Fine." I reached down into the bag of supplies at my feet to see what Molly had packed for us. Anything not to have to look Nightingale in the face right then. Suddenly, being in the Ferrari was absolutely the last place I wanted to be.

[syms-things-5]

Clear The Area - Chapter Seven

Previous Chapter HERE

Warning: Some language

Chapter Seven

Curled up on the sofa next to Shan with the bottle of red Noah had left was where Sarah found herself later that same evening, not entirely of her own doing. She’d changed into her sweatpants and her old university hoodie for comfort as soon as she’d arrived back but she still found it hard to relax.

Earlier, after they’d left the gallery, they had continued walking to the restaurant Jocelyn had scouted for them based upon a magazine review she’d read in Home & Country. They had managed to keep their awkwardness to a minimum so no one could tell but Chris soon felt the need to make an excuse and leave. Just before they arrived at the restaurant, he turned to thank Noah and Jocelyn for a nice afternoon and left them to it claiming his producer had emailed some last-minute script amendments he needed to be clued up on. Thankfully, he was a good enough actor that they didn’t suspect anything was amiss. He kissed Jocelyn on the cheek and patted Noah on the back of his shoulder but pretty much ignored Sarah as he walked off back in the direction of his own apartment, head down to avoid the rain. The three of them continued but Sarah had lost her appetite by that point so they called it a night after having a drink at the bar next door.

She texted Chris on the way home to tell him her folks had said it was nice to see him. She had no real reason to tell him that of course but it seemed like the thing to do. That was now over an hour ago and Chris still hadn’t responded. Anyone else would have assumed, logically, that he simply hadn’t seen it yet, or he had been in the process of replying but got distracted with something else, but she knew differently. She found herself anxious at the best of times but not so much concerned with what other people thought of her, if they thought anything at all, or whether she had annoyed anyone. The Evans clan were the exception to that rule. They knew her better than almost anyone. She figured, should she ever wind up missing, that she would be one of those people about whom others would give very banal police statements such as “she was quiet” or “she kept herself to herself” or “actually, now you mention it, she does look a little bit like a female Cillian Murphy.” She almost certainly would not have a candle-light vigil held for her in a park, which was a sobering thought.

“This guy’s a dick.” spoke Shan, mouth full of cookie dough, snapping Sarah out of her head for a second. “He’s stolen another designer’s idea but the judges haven’t figured it out yet.”

Sarah tried quickly to catch up with what was happening on the TV screen. “Is he gonna get away with it? Will they get told, or...?”

“Yeh, the producers will say something. They’re just ramping it up for the drama.”

Sarah loved how into Reality TV Shanna was. Don’t count her out of a quiz team; she knows everything there is to know about Project Runway and could put anyone to shame with her intricate knowledge of Kim Kardashian’s romantic life. Possibly even more so than Kim herself. It was both strangely impressive and kind of scary at the same time, and was possible also the reason why Chris never invited her to parties in L.A.

“So, who is going to win again? Is there a frontrunner yet?”

“We’ve only had three episodes but Jody, definitely. She’s soooo cool. I’m following her on Instagram and she designed these flares that I’m gonna buy if they ever go on sale.” Shan pulled out her phone and started scrolling through the app to find them.

Sarah poured herself another glass of wine and waiting to be blown away by Shan’s ever-changing fashion sense. She wished she was confident with clothes and colour as Shanna had grown to be. She was never afraid to experiment with what she wore, often clashing but somehow always pulling it off. Confidence is key, she would say if you asked her for advice. You can wear absolutely anything you like if you act like you don’t give a shit. In stark contrast, if you managed to find something that wasn’t beige or mauve in Sarah’s closet, it would be a miracle. Actually, if you managed to find anything in her closet that was younger than five years old would be a rarer find than a double rainbow. “Autumnal” is how she would describe it. “Dull as fuck” would be Audrey’s response. 

“Oh, Chris wants to know if we’re bringing anyone to his party next week. Matt needs numbers. Do you think Audrey will fancy coming?” Shan offered without looking up from her phone. “Actuallt, stupid question.”

“Actually, no, I don’t think so. I think it’s hers and Michael’s anniversary. She mentioned they were thinking of driving up to the coast.” She took a sip from her glass. “Did he just ask you that?”

“Yeh. Well, like ten minutes ago but I forgot to say anything.” Shan was still scrolling through her phone to find the photograph and couldn’t see the dejection cross Sarah’s face.

“Here they are. Look. Funky or what?” Shan excitedly waved her phone in Sarah’s direction so she could only make out a swirl of blue and purple. They were definitely flares, though. Ideal for a themes costume party but probably everyday wear for someone as ballsy as Shanna. “I reckon these with my black platforms and that red angora sweater of yours.” Maybe Sarah’s wardrobe was of some appeal after all.

“Yeh, I could see you in those for sure.” Sarah smiled. “But that sweater is the only decent thing I could wear on a date that isn’t part of my day to day stuff so you need to be careful with it.”

“Aww you saving it for Greg?” Shan winked.

“Hardly.” Sarah tried to find the energy to eye roll back at her but she was too bothered by the confirmation that Chris was almost certainly absolutely definitely ignoring her.

“Shan? I think I’ve done something stupid and I’m not sure what to do.”

Shan looked taken aback for a moment before just plain confused. “Sarah, you don’t do ‘stupid’. Whatever it is, I’m sure it’s fixable.” she leaned forward a little, moving closer to Sarah on the armchair next to the couch. “You know, it sounds odd but I had this feeling something was going on. You’ve been a little distracted lately. What is it?”

Now it was Sarah’s turn to hope Shanna wouldn’t be mad at her. “You know I contacted the agency? About Charlotte? Well, they’ve put me in touch with her and things have moved on a little bit since and now we’re sort of talking to each other. We’re thinking of meeting up soon.”

Shanna’s eyes grew wider in surprise. She’d known about Sarah’s response to the agency’s request and had made her feelings approximately clear some time before, but the actual talking part was new information.

“We’ve been texting a bit.” Sarah continued with some trepidation. “She gave them her number to pass on to me. She’s thinking of coming to Boston soon, maybe to have a drink or something. What do you think?”

Shan looked at Sarah without blinking for a moment. She didn’t know what to think. “Wow, you have her number? And she has yours? Obviously, sorry. That was a dumb thing to ask. OK. Well, I guess that’s that then.” Shanna placed her phone down on the coffee table in front of her and readjusted her position on the couch so she was facing Sarah more now.

Sarah rubbed the back of her neck. “Chris thinks I’m being stupid.”

“Oh, Chris thinks everyone is stupid if they don’t think the exact same way he does.” Shanna exaggerated her eye roll causing Sarah to chuckled. “Have you heard him talk about Giants fans?!”

“He is right, though, isn’t he? It’s a risk. I mean, she didn’t want to know before so what’s changed now?”

“A lot of things could have changed, Sarah. I guess you’ll find out soon enough.” Shanna responded. “When do you think you guys’ll meet?”

“She’s gonna let me know. She has to travel to Boston so I guess it depends on her journey.” Sarah shrugged, noting Shanna’s scepticism. “I’m sure she’ll contact me.”

“Yes, of course she will.” Shanna briefly paused. “Where is she from?”

“Raleigh, North Carolina. She wasn’t born there, I don’t think. Moved for work. I’m guessing she’s from Michigan originally but I don’t really know that for sure.”

Shanna nodded along, taking in everything Sarah was telling her and trying not to appear cynical. Having been on the end of something similar some years earlier, she appreciated how comforting the support was even if she herself knew it to be forged somehow. She knew the last thing Sarah would need right now was to be told she was being foolish, and she made a mental note to elbow her stupid brother in his ribcage the next time she saw him.

“I was going to tell them this weekend but I bottled it. After everything Chris said, I just figured maybe they would think I didn’t appreciate them enough. I just can’t put that on them. Not now. Not until I’ve at least met her.” Sarah rubbed both hands down her face. She didn’t know what to do and had kind of hoped that Shanna would magically make everything better.

“From everything I know of Joss and Noah, I really don’t think they would ever stop you from seeing her.” Shan nudged Sarah’s foot with her own, trying to get her attention back. “You can’t expect them to be over the moon aout it but they would at least understand your choosing to do so. And despite Chris’s opinion, that’s what this is. Your choosing. You have control over this and if you say so, well, then...that’s all that matters.”

Sarah smiled softly at Shanna, glad she’d taken the plunge and finally told her what was going on. Her shoulders felt a little lighter after removing some of the weight.

“But I can’t promise we’ll be OK. We’ll worry about you until she gives us reason not to.” Shanna leaned back on the couch, wine now in hand, and curled her feet back under herself. “Tough shit.”

Sarah watched as a smile slowly spread across Shanna’s face, her eyes full of sympathy. “You have to face it. We love you very much and if she dares even cross you? Just once? We’ll burn her house down.”

“OK.” Sarah nodded, wiping her eyes of the tears that had started forming in the corners. “OK, deal.”

*

Nothing had really changed in the days that followed. Sarah had the impression Chris was continuing to ignore her, with only short, clipped phrases padding out any conversation they might have had by accident. She was also pretty sure he and Lisa had both been talking to Shanna about it when he thought she couldn’t hear him, casually enquiring about her plans to meet. At several times, she caught the ends of hushed conversations and experience the odd awkward moment where everything would freeze as soon as she’d walk into the room. If they had been hoping to alleviate any concern, they were failing. Shanna was also a terrible liar at the best of times but to her credit, Sarah had heard her give Chris an earful for what he’d said to her following their visit to the McCurry exhibition and he had promised to offer Sarah an apology but that had yet to materialise, not that she cared much. Shanna had also decided not to give away any details of their impending meeting and for that, she’d be eternally grateful. 

“So,” Audrey said, leaning on the desk where Sarah had set up camp to catch up on some patient admin. “You’re really going to see her, huh? How will you know it’s her?”

“How do you mean?” Sarah looked up briefly from the papers in front of her, a crease forming on her brow. She was fed up of people’s judgements.

“Will she be carrying a white newspaper and some roses, or has she sent you a photograph of herself so you know who to look out for?”

 No sarcasm intended, Audrey was serious and she was right. That was a really good question. Crap. She hadn’t given much thought to asking Charlotte what she looked like and the photograph from twenty-nine years ago of a young curly-haired brunette with wide, tired eyes might not be the most entirely accurate depiction to work off. She could be a full-time blonde right now, and she had no idea how tall or slim she might be. In a strange way, being caught up in the unnerving anticipation of finally meeting her birth mother, she must have simply assumed they would bear a passing resemblance to one another. That their eyes would meet across a room and they would know instantly who the other person was. Maybe they would hug first and conversation would flow naturally from there and it would be like, where have you been all my life? 

One thing Lisa had offered by way of advice was to tell Sarah to stop putting unrealistic expectations on herself. She told her she didn’t want her to be disappointed but it was almost too late for that now. She couldn’t help but get a little carried away the more she thought about the infinite possibilities and the closer their arranged date crept up on her, the more agitated she became.

Work had been something of a welcome distraction. A chance to ground herself in reality as opposed to daydreaming all the what-ifs she might have before the weekend arrived. She’d even allowed herself to flirt a little bit with Greg, not too much but certainly enough to garner Audrey’s amusement and surprise.

“I’m just saying. It’s worth asking for some kind of idea of what she plans to wear, or maybe you should tell her something about yourself?” Audrey suggested. “I’ve always thought you would look amazing with rose gold hair and that would give you a perfect way to stand out.”

“I’m not gonna dye my hair. Remember what happened last time? That charity thing? I had to replace all of my towels.” They both laughed at the memory but something had clearly struck a chord somewhere inside her and Sarah pondered it for a second. “You’re right, though. I haven’t really thought much beyond the day itself.” Sarah looked back down at the work in front of her, all of it suddenly losing focus. “Tell you the truth, I have no idea what I’m going to say to her.”

“Yes, you are quite awkward at the best of times, aren’t you?”

Sarah eyed Audrey for a second unsure of what to say before catching the smirk on her face. She threw a roll-up memo note at her face.

“What do you think you’ll say to her?” Audrey asked, more seriously now.

Sarah took a deep break and leaned back in her chair. Truthfully, she had been losing sleep over this very subject, swinging between general chit-chat you would have with a long-lost pal you’d just added on Facebook, and calling her every name under the sun. She figured the fairest most useful thing would be somewhere between the two.

“I have no idea. Every time I think I have a hold on the situation, some other thought pops into my head and it’s like I’m back at zero again.” She threw the pen she’d been holding on to the table and looked at Audrey. Audrey’s face was full of something akin to worry.

“If you like, I could always call you, like on a date? If everything is OK, you can ignore it. If not, it could be your get-out clause?” Audrey offered. If Sarah had asked, Audrey would have probably staked the place out and sat next to them all night, and only partly because she was nosier than she would admit.

“I love you, Audrey.”

Audrey playfully rolled her eyes. “OK, I get it. This is something you have to do yourself. Just know the offer still stands, OK?” Sarah nodded gratefully. “I’m off in ten and I don’t think I’ll see you again before, so...take care. Let me know how it goes, yeh?”

She grabbed Sarah’s shoulder in a tight grip before walking out of the room, leaving Sarah to her mountain of paperwork and another three hours of shift before she could head home and try to get some sleep.

Sarah waited a second before pulling her phone out of her pocket. The last messages she had sent over the past day or two had all been to Charlotte; all of them casual enough but she’d answered every single one of them. Relief washed over her momentarily as she considered how to approach the awkward subject of not having a clue what her biological mother looked like. Then again, this whole situation was awkward. It was awkward as hell, so she just went for it.

Sarah 9.02pm: Just a thought. Who should I look out for this Friday?

Mercifully, she didn’t have to wait long for a response. The feeling she had was almost pleasant and it caught her off guard.

Charlotte 9.09pm: Oh my word, I didn’t think!! I’ll be in a red dress. Boots. Honestly I only have one nice outfit ;)

She allowed herself to smile for a second at her reply, taking a moment to think about what she was doing. If she could meet Charlotte for an hour, nothing too pressured, she could easily grab a cab to Chris’ place afterwards and still be there before 9pm. No one would notice.

Sarah 9.12pm: No problem. I’ll look out for you. Still OK for 7.30?

Charlotte 9.14pm: Absolutely! Looking forward to it x

*

[courage-a-word-of-justice]

HGPC 17 - 21 | Koi to Producer 2 - 6 | Appare 5 - 8 | Fugou Keiji 4 - 6

...only just realised I was missing some tags. They should be there now or soon.

HGPC 17

Why do I get the feeling the Sawaizumi family will be held hostage one day…? (Maybe I’m just being negative?)

The episode title mentions Chiyu by name, so I wonder why the translation didn’t…

Customer service! You can’t get away from it, even in COVID times…! (Impressive!)

Hmm…you can actually read part of the booking for the Smiths in the book if you know the kanji.

I thought the Smiths would speak in English, but they actually speak in fluent Japanese if the word “susume” was any indication.

Ah, Sukoyaka sweet buns! (from the other episode about the festival)

HGPC 18

Don’t burn down your house with scented candles, kids!

Also remember to use your knees when lifting heavy boxes! (<- says a charity store volunteer, who does this stuff on the regular)

These days the mascots usually have a human form. I wonder if this is implying that particular direction…? (I woke up today and was craving a certain oneshot I’d read during my scanlation days…if it is, it would fill that niche nicely.)

I wonder if the kids will recognise this Ashita no Joe parody…?

HGPC 19

“…since you were young?”

Oh! Element of Wind again!

Koi to Producer 2

This almost feels like Victor is assigning a school project to Protag-chan…it’s a bit sad, really.

It’s nice they let Protag-chan have a personality.

It’s fine if you can’t read the katakana, but Gavin’s name is Haku in Japanese, so it throws out the immersion somewhat…also, I know I shouldn’t be complaining – I’m the target audience here – but do these guys look kinda similar or what…? (partially kidding)

High school sweethearts, huh? “Childhood friends” is my favourite angle of a romantic relationship, but it gets so overused by harems it comes around to being boring…!

I-Is this Stand My Heroes…?! (LOL…?)

Can we not with 1st person cam…?

As cute and dorky as this stuff gets…how does Gavin never get found?! Does nobody ever look up in this city?!? (I thought Evolvers were meant to be a secret…?)

GPS tracker? That’s no better than large corporations using your location data…Isn’t that creepy…?

Hold on, when did she get his phone number? You would assume it was before this entire chase after the boy happened, but still…?

LOL, the English on the board.

This anime is gonna cause me some frustration, but it gives the good stuff in roughly equal measure. It seems to omit the fact you interact via phone with your bois for intimacy (in the game).

Koi to Producer 3

LOL, that’s so clearly Gavin…

By googling, you find out Uptown and Queens are in New York.

Ohmygosh! Did the creators know I love the trope where only people with superpowers can move in certain circumstances?!

Uh…his name is Kira in Japanese? Did someone read the katakana wrong?

Pictured: Depressed bishonen eating bad pudding. (…That joke sounds better in my head. I forgot what meme I was meant to be parodying there, but I had a meme in mind.)

Lemme guess…this man (I dunno if it’s one of the previous bishies with an identical face or a new one) is looking for MC-chan. *sigh* Update: Yep, just Victor again. To be honest, I don’t like anyone who calls harsh words “their sign of love” – love should be honest and upfront. That’s how it becomes heartmelting.

Koi to Producer 4

Okay, in order, it seems to be hexadecimals, Javascript (you can tell from the “const”), some kind of profiles which are apparently for human lab rats (which seem to have some kind of nonsense filler text), a DNA model and DNA bases (ACGT).

The text on the screen says something along the lines of this being an official broadcast of this man’s arrest and this man was a genetic researcher. Obviously, if I wanted to put more attention into what it meant, I would, but I won’t sweat the details this time (because it doesn’t seem to impact the plot).

The guy’s name is Minor because minor key (geddit?)…that’s my guess.

I started playing the game due to this anime, if you didn’t know, and I unlocked an expert in ch. 2. I thought he was Minor, but turns out his name is Spine (an older man).

The diary, true to form, contains details about either one case or several cases, two involving children. The bottom of the 1st page says “if it’s fake, I’ll laugh”.

Hey, I once told Crunchyroll I wanted an anime about hacking (so is this a dream come true? I reveal all in the next sentence!). Hackers don’t congregate like this…they’d be too conspicuous, even with the secret hideout!

The code in the top left appears to be…C? I think? (Note they declare “unsigned int”.)

Kiro sometimes reminds me of Masayoshi (SamFlam)…it puts a derpy smile on my face.

*blah blah blah I’m Key* - Wuh…? F*** you, Kiro!!! (There is such a thing as piling too much cool stuff on to a character, y’know – I’m guilty of it in my own writing.)

3684 isn’t a very safe password (says someone who once aspired to be in cybersecurity).

What bugs me is that Simon is a perfectly fine name…it’s just a bit boring. Kiro/Kira I get (a bit), but Lucien/Simon…? *shrugs*

Ohh! Based MAPPA! Thank you for making this adaption look great!

Koi to Producer 5

Oh, I got an SR in the game recently and it has a line like, “Only a fool stays up all night to do others’ work. Victor talks like that a lot…

The sign so obviously says “Renka”, meaning “love flower”. “Loveland” really is a step down from that…

Where’s Gavin’s guest badge…?

“Happiness Noodle Store”…?

“…the end of our first year…”

If this weren’t a Chinese work by origin (or Japanese work by translation), I’m sure Protag-chan would have gone after Gavin, despite being told the contrary.

Kanya = Minor. I’ll take a note of that.

One of the books behind Minor says “Gale Start”…hmm…

That GPS tracker is still unintentionally creepy, IMHO.

Koi to Producer 6

…oh. (dejected) Probably a beach episode or something.

What the actual heck was going on with Lucien…? It’s like he was having a tiny stroke there…

Lucien’s power is listed as “???” in the game. I thought he was an aura-reader when he said “show me your colour”, but that shield thing he did means he might just have various psychic powers…? *shrugs* We’ll find out eventually.

Running in heels is hard…

LOL, that’s so clearly recreating a CG from one of the cards.

This is the 2nd time this has gone pseudo-isekai. As much as I like to joke about it…I fully expect someone to be sent to another world at this point.

I couldn’t possibly see Victor on any kind of game show, come to think of it.

Appare 5

This guy’s middle name is “Rich”! That’s silly!

A boombox from the 19th century…makes sense, somehow.

I only just (?) realised Al has a tiny tie on his usual outfit.

Back to the beginning already…just start!

Appare 6

…I just realised Appare mouths “I got it!” in the OP.

Al Lion (sic…?)

Isn’t Sofia in that train…? Update: She might have been, she might not. Hard to tell when they don’t confirm.

This series seriously could’ve done with a dub…Even with weird hokey Hetalia accents, it would be good stuff.

These bunches of people at designated points…reminds me of the book I was reading while in Japan. The Long Walk by Stephen King (part of a compilation). It still gives me shivers down my spine when I remember it.

This “leave in the middle of the night” thing reminds me of the Amazing Race.

“Valley of Despair” is made-up, but Death Valley exists. It’s one of the hottest places on earth, hence the name.

LOL, Kosame scores himself one (1) prarie dog and two (2) Hototos.

I thought Appare was being inconsiderate at first…but he’s being considerate, in his own way.

Oh! I didn’t realise, but Saito Soma is Al.

Appare 7

“It’s not one plus one, but one times one!” – LOL.

Hybrid engine? In the 1900s? Hmm…

LOL, I think Al just did a hadouken.

This stuff’s like an animated Galaxy Brain meme! It’s amazing!

I managed to successfully predict – without watching ahead – Appare would catch himself with his traps.

Kosame with his hair down…is rare. Not exactly attractive because we have to care about the racers rather than lust after them (and the artstyle actually prevents me from doing so, because it’s deliberately quite cartoony), but it’s rare.

Appare is surprisingly childish…that’s what makes him more than a Sheldon Cooper, I think.

The spelling of the place is actually “Ely”, if Google-sensei is any indication. C’mon, subbers! You’re American (most likely)! Can’t you put in the legwork (or the Google-fu) to discover what place in Nevada this is?!

Subbers make characters say “shit” a lot in this show, hmm? (contemplative)

Now this evil guy here *points to screen*…that’s hair I like.

Appare 8

I just love this OP…don’t you?

I like how the steam/gas boat/car has Chinese numerals on its dial.

Kosame means “small rain”, so “heavy rain” is obviously to contrast that.

The Hototo joke never gets old.

I thought I just saw someone leave the saloon…

Nice hair + terrible face = bad equation.

I can almost imagine the wee-oo-wee-oo-ooooooo…wah-wah-wahhh…(You know the one sound snippet, right? The one theme from The Good, the Bad and the Ugly - or whatever movie it is – that maybe involves a tumbleweed rolling across the screen, and then a huge shootout? If you don’t know it, play a sample on this Wikipedia page!) playing in the background.

It’s convenient the prarie dog didn’t appear when Hototo (old) had his revenge spree.

I noticed there’s a bit of a mark under Kosame’s left eye…it suggests that he’s been crying (or maybe it shows tiredness from the race…?), but it’s not that noticeable.

So that’s the real Gil…and tose were his henchmen that threatened to hang everyone bar Kosame. Got it.

(notes to self) So, for charting a course with Appare Ranman!, it’s Los Angeles -> Death Valley -> Ely -> Denver -> ??? -> New York. Got it.

Fugou Keiji 4

“Daisuke-sama” isn’t “Lord Daisuke”, it would be “Sir Daisuke”, I think…but “lord” has a proper translation in Japanese.

The truck has a Shinagawa licence plate. Anime really does like Shinagawa, huh? (Based on ID: INVADED and this.)

I think it’ll be interesting to see Kambe handle this without HEUSC.

The board for Sanchome (which is equivalent to a suburb…or a county, I guess?) has posters saying stuff like “take your dog poop home” and “let’s protect the environment!” (technically, it says “let’s protect the region/area!”, but that doesn’t translate right. There’s even a flea market. Still, those posters don’t have any big hints…not that I know of so far.

I kind of forgot that dude was the gardener for Kambe’s house…er, mansion.

I noticed a poster in the kouban says haru (spring) on it. That’s probably the same one that Haru’s name is signified by, assuming that’s not in combo with another character or few.

Oh great…the sister is an overbearing one.

Ahh…he doesn’t like natto. So that’s the problem. Daisuke is childish (like Appare)…Note I don’t like natto either, but I wouldn’t run away from home (or similar) because I was fed natto.

I noticed Kambe uses shinseki (which doesn’t refer to close family). “Relative” is a correct translation of that word, I just wanted to check that word was the right one for the context.

There’s a green tea bottle by the sink…I don’t think I’d mistake that shade of green for anything else.

LOL, I didn’t think we’d actually get to see Kambe with his hair “down”, so to speak. It’s…an interesting look, for sure.

Oh my gosh! It cost him (Haru) $15!!! (LOL, cheapskate…says the cheapskate…*suddenly droops and stops laughing*) Update: Sorry about the sudden downer there. I was having what the kids these days call a “woke moment”…at least, I think that’s how they use that term.

…I’d watch that crime drama. It’s funny.

Just realised Kato has an older model of phone than Kambe does.

This episode was kinda like a Tokyo Sonata kind of thing, huh? The sensational in the middle of the not-so-sensational…”sensational” for this show, anyway.

Those kids look like the ones from Erased.

*lightbulb goes off in brain* What if the dog went to Kambe’s…?

Can Suzue actually hear HEUSC while Kambe is using it…? $2.46 though…that is cheap, in comparison to the ham.

This was the cheapest episode so far (about $550)…probably because it was an insight into Kato’s life, more than Kambe’s.

Fugou Keiji 5

The flag seems to be based on Cameroon’s (which is in Africa, not America) and the “Arita Kinen” seems to refer to Arima Kinen, meaning this episode is set around Christmas-ish. Credit goes to Kambe Zaibatsu on this show.

I-It’s a Humvee!

Polyadoll (sic)…?

The Poliador guy speaks perfect Japanese…(?)

The star! It’s a key thingy!

I thought Kamei was the 1st Division dude with the reddish hair. Turns out it was the blonde…? Update: Redhead is Hoshino.

Ummmmmm…he was reading porn…? Uhhhhhhhhhhhhh…okayyyyyyyyyyyyy…

…oh, the costs for Kambe’s tuxedo are on there. So’s the cost for repairing the bike Suzue rode.

Fugou Keiji 6

I never knew there were so many money proverbs to be used as episode titles…

What is Kambe doing with his hands…? He’s not even using the computer.

Imura seems to use a Windows 10 with Cortana on the taskbar.

HGPC 20

What’s with all the Naruto running this episode…?

HGPC 21

(no notes, sorry!)

[raspberryparker]

all to myself | h.o.

Harrison Osterfield x Fem!Reader — Enemies to Lovers AU

complete masterlist

word count: 4.5k summary: you’re certain haz is just out to sabotage your friendship with tom. so when you get a chance to talk to him about alone, he reveals his true colours. warnings: was this fic an excuse to write gratuitous smut? mayhaps no. that being said, here’s the n*fw warning. smut: unprotected sex wrap your tool, kids, biting, dirty talk, dom/sub, body worship, slight spanking.. if im missing any please tell me.

requests: closed | commissions: open add yourself to my taglist! like my work? check out my commissions!

━━━━━━━━

   You really didn’t want to be in this situation.

   Your fingers toyed with the straw in the glass in front of you as watched the bubbles from the carbonation rise slowly from the bottom. Maybe if you concentrated hard enough, you’d float off like one of them and finally be able to escape this terrible fate.

   How did this even happen?

   Oh right. It was his fault.

   “Ah shit, mate,” Tom had sighed over the phone. “I forgot about today.”

   “That’s fine,” you said, pouring yourself a cup of tea. “That’s why I called you. Wanted to make sure you were still up for it. If you’re busy we can reschedule, though.”

   “I can’t do that to you,” he insisted. “You know I’m gonna be busy for the next little while. Got that new movie coming up…”

   “And you still won’t tell me what it is,” you laughed. “I’m proud of you, Thomas. I’m surprised you haven’t spoiled anything yet.”

   “I’d like to think I’ve matured, Y/N,” he teased, obviously miffed you called him by his full name. “Besides, last time that happened—”

   “Marvel beat your ass, yes I know. Fine, you don’t have to tell me.”

   “You’re so understanding.”

   “It’s just who I am,” you grinned. You knew he could probably hear it in your voice through the phone. “So you still want to get lunch today? A final send-off before you devote yourself to your craft and forget about my existence?”

   “As if I could forget you,” he laughed. “I’d die without you, mate. But yeah, lunch today is good. There is one thing, though.”

   “I love things.”

   “I don’t think you’ll like this particular thing.”

   You pressed the phone between your shoulder and ear, holding it in place as you pressed you brought your tea up to your lips and blew gently on it to cool it down.

   “Okay, now you’ve got me interested.”

   “Well,” he began. “I forgot about today because we planned it a few weeks ago and I’m really sorry, but Harrison and I had made plans to hang out somewhere today so… can he come?”

   “Uh,” you said, your brow furrowing. “Yes? Why wouldn’t he be able to come?”

   “You two don’t exactly get along,” he laughed nervously. “I don’t want to make you uncomfortable because it’s totally on me that I forgot about today so if you want I can—”

   “Tom, it’s fine,” you sighed. “It’s not like we hate each other.”

   “You say that and yet…”

   “Shut up, idiot.”

   “Okay, so that’s a yes?” he asked, not denying the fact that he was an idiot.

   “Of course of it is,” you’d replied.

   Oh, how naive you were. Of course, it wasn’t going to go well.

   And besides, Harrison had no right to look that good for a simple lunch. He looked like he’d just walked off a red carpet. Not even Tom, who was sitting beside him sipping casually on a coke as he raised an eyebrow at you, looked that… good.

   Harrison wasn’t even doing anything important. He was just looking off to the side, probably ogling a waitress or something, as he brought a chip up to his lips and bit down.

   You swallowed harshly as he did.

   His hair was styled perfectly, the front of it upswept and brushed to the side, revealing the entirety of his grossly perfect face. The sharp edge of his jawline moved as he chewed, and you watched the bounce of the muscles along the length of it and had to bring your glass of water up to your lips. The denim jacket that clung to his shoulders gripped his frame perfectly and it was just so unfair.

   Good thing it was almost over.

   “Are you doing anything after this?” you asked Tom, hoping to break the silence.

   “Yeah,” he replied. “I have a meeting to go to. And I actually—” he paused, bringing his watch up to look at the time. “—should get going.”

   “Sure,” you said. “I can get the bill.”

   “No,” Tom said. “I got it. Oh, and before I forget, you left some clothes at our flat. Been meaning to give them back but I keep forgetting. Harrison washed them for you so if you’re not busy you can go grab them right now.”

   “You did?” you asked incredulously, looking at Harrison.

   He shrugged, crystal blue eyes refusing to meet yours as he continued to munch on the remainder of his food.

   “Yeah, he did,” Tom smiled. He stood and grabbed the jacket from the back of his chair, slinging it over an arm as he reached into his jeans and pulled out his wallet. “He can drive you there if you want. You’re not busy later, right?”

   The question was directed toward Harrison. His mouth opened, gaping like a fish for a moment before he caught your gaze. He sighed and shrugged.

   “Yeah, I suppose I can,” he agreed.

   “Awesome,” Tom smiled. “I’ll go pay, you two get going. I’m gonna be late again, but fuck it.”

   After saying goodbye to Tom, complete with a hug and him complaining about how you messed up his hair when you ruffled it gently, you followed Harrison to his car. It wasn’t exactly a perfect day, but it was nice; as nice at it could get in London. The sun was completely obscured by the clouds but it wasn’t raining so, of course, he had the top down.

   He stepped around to driver’s side and got in, eyeing you carefully as you reached over and put your bag in the backseat before opening the door to the passenger side and getting into the car. He hadn’t even bothered to open the door for you. Not that you were mad, you could open your own door. But why would he do something like that for you?

   The ride to Tom and Harrison’s flat was nothing short of awkward. You could cut the tension with a knife.

   Until you decided you’d had enough.

   “Do you think I’m stupid?”

   Harrison turned to you for a moment before focusing back on the road ahead of him, a ghost of a smile on his lips.

   “Depends on the reason you’re asking,” he said. It was the first thing he’d said to you since the restaurant and it was already making you grind your teeth together.

   “I know you heard us planning lunch a few weeks ago,” you said. “You live with him. Why of all days do you have to plan to hang out on the day that we were supposed to go to lunch?”

   “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said.

   You turned to your right, glancing at him, and saw the smile that crept up on his face. The corner of his lips tilted upward even though he was keeping his eyes on the road. His hair flew wildly about his face in the wind. You shook your head, slumping into your seat.

   “Unbelievable.”

   When you arrived at the flat, it was even worse.

   Harrison turned the key in the lock and pushed the door open, throwing his keys onto the kitchen table once you both stepped in. You shut the door behind you and watched as he tugged off his jacket one sleeve at a time. He threw it onto the back of the couch, leaving him only in a grey t-shirt that hugged his arms a little too beautifully, and turned to you with a sigh.

   “Your stuff’s in the laundry room,” he said. “You can go grab it and then you can go.”

   You were taken aback for a moment.

   “I’m sorry?”

   “I’m just saying,” he muttered, brushing a hand through his hair. “You obviously don’t wanna be here any longer than you have to ‘cause Tom’s not here so…”

   “No, wait,” you said, crossing your arms and stepping toward him. “I want to talk about this. Why do you hate me? What have I done for you to dislike me so much, I don’t get it.”

   Harrison sighed again, his hand still in his hair.

   “Do we have to do this right now?”

   “Why not,” you said. You took a seat at the kitchen table as he leaned on the back of the couch. “We’re both here. Tom’s not here. Might as well get it all out in the open.”

   “I’d really rather not—”

   “Just tell me, Harrison,” you sighed. “I’m sick of this. Don’t you think we should resolve this for Tom’s sake? It’s tearing him apart. You’re his best friend and practically his fourth brother, and he’s my best friend. He’s all I’ve got out here. I don’t wanna make his life miserable because we don’t get along.”

   “Fine,” Harrison said. “You wanna know what I think?”

   “I do.”

   “I’m scared,” he admitted, though his expression was serious. Almost angry, in fact. “Because every other girl who’s ever stepped foot in this flat claiming to be Tom’s ‘friend’ has only wanted two things—” he listed them off on his fingers as he spoke. “—sex and money. And my brother, because you said it yourself, he’s my brother, has to get his heart broken over and over because girls want to take advantage of him solely because of who he is. And frankly? I don’t know if I can trust you.”

   “You really think I’d do that?” you asked. Your expression was sad, brows furrowed as you stood from your spot and stepped toward him. “Harrison, I love Tom. I’m so far from home and he’s my closest friend; fuck, he’s my only friend. Why would I give that up? I don’t care about his money, I care about him as a person.”

   You shook your head, crossing your arms over your chest. “I thought you of all people would be able to see that with how much time I spend in your damn apartment.”

   “Flat,” he mumbled under his breath.

   “Oh, whatever.”

   He glanced up at you then, surprised at the chuckle at left your lifts with those words. His eyes were wide and curious as if he’d never seen you laugh before. You shook your head as you smiled to yourself, biting your lips as you met his eyes again. From his position leaning against the couch, he was just about eye level with you, and you saw his lips break into the first real smile—not a smirk or a snigger—but a real smile as he laughed quietly under his breath.

   “Do you believe me now?” you asked softly.

   “I always believed you,” he said. Your brows furrowed as he looked up and met your gaze. “I… I guess I was jealous, too. You spend so much time with Tom, you’re so close, I guess I was keeping you away from him for my sake too.”

   “W-what do you mean?”

   “I don’t think I could take it if you and Tom did end up together,” he admitted. His cheeks were beginning to glow a little redder as he spoke. “So I guess I was trying to keep you all to myself.”

   “I thought you hated me,” you admitted, stepping forward.

   He laughed mirthlessly, his shoulder shaking as he looked down at his lap.

   “Are you joking?” he asked, voice barely above a whisper. “First time Tom brought you home I almost thought I’d died.”

   “What are you—”

   “‘Here’s this angel,’ I said to myself. ‘And she’s with Tom. Again.’ I always end up third-wheeling around him and his past girlfriends. I thought I’d have to live through that again. But it was…. different.”

   He sighed and looked up to meet your gaze. His ice blue eyes looked sad.

   “It hurt a little more with you,” he admitted. “Because you’re… so beautiful. And I was jealous. Tom always gets the pretty girls.”

   “I’m not that pretty,” you muttered.

   “You are,” he replied, eyes serious. “You don’t see it but you are.”

   You sighed, rolling your eyes and throwing your arms up in exasperation. You stepped toward him until your feet were almost touching.

   “Then why didn’t you talk to me?” you asked. “Why didn’t you… say anything?”

   “Guess I was scared.”

   You smiled softly, grinning at him.

   “If anyone was scared it was me,” you said. He looked up at you in confusion. “I thought the hottest guy I knew hated me. And if that wasn’t a blow to the old self esteem, I don’t know what is.”

   “You…” he began, but trailed off when you stepped closer to him, standing between his legs. He looked almost afraid.

   His hand was shaking as he brought it up under your chin, gripping your jaw with such a delicacy, it was like he was handling the finest porcelain in the world.

   And the smirk was back, but you only saw it for a fraction of a second, before his large, warm hands were cupping your cheeks and he pulled you softly in. His lips were so warm, much softer than you expected but it was so good, almost too good as you pushed into him. Harrison’s hands moved from your cheeks down your arms, tracing the curves of your waist before he squeezed your ass. You gasped into his mouth, pulling away as you rested your forehead against his. He was panting, breath hot on your wet lips.

   “Been wanting to feel that ass for so long,” he whispered.

   You moaned out loud, pressing into his chest.

   Harrison’s lips moved down your neck and along your jaw, nipping at certain places and sucking on others. He stood from his spot on the back of the couch and suddenly his mouth was at a much better angle. It felt like he was swallowing you whole and you loved it. He tapped your thigh before giving it a squeeze, and you raised it up his leg. He placed his hands underneath your thighs and hoisted you up against him, and as you rose you felt his clothed hardness brush against your core and he rumbled against your throat at the friction.

   With your hands in his hair, ruining the perfect style that you’d admired from earlier, he tried to maneuver through the flat as best as he could, trying to find his bedroom.

   He shoved the door open, walking you towards his bed until his knees hit the edge of it and he lowered you down against it. You let him go as you lay on your back against his sheets, face flushed and chest rising and lowering with each heavy breath. He stood for a moment longer, admiring your spread form on his bed.

   All for him.

   “So beautiful,” he murmured

   “Stop,” you whined, bringing your hands up to cover your chest even though you were still fully clothed.

   “No, no, no, darling,” he smiled, kneeling over you and pulling your hands away. You gave little resistance, allowing him to move you like a doll. “Let me see you.”

   Fingertips trailing down your abdomen, Harrison found the bottom of your shirt and tugged it upwards. He kissed along the soft skin of your stomach as he moved it up, lips following the hem as he slowly pulled it off of you. When he’d finally tugged it off, he loomed over you and smiled.

   “You’re perfect, love,” he murmured. His hands slipped underneath your back and undid the clasp of your bra, taking both that and your shirt and throwing them somewhere into his room. His palm found the mound of one of your breasts, kneading it softly as you threw your head back against the mattress and moaned. He took the opportunity to attach his lips to your neck, sucking harshly as he pinched your nipple. “And you’re all mine.”

   Harrison’s attention returned to your breast, his hand still massaging one but his lips finding the nipple of the other. He rolled his teeth over the hardened bud, never quite biting but allowing you to feel the edge of them against it.

   “Fuck,” you sighed. “All yours. Only yours, oh fuck.”

   “Sound so pretty for me, Y/N,” he sighed. His tongue circled the nipple under his mouth before giving it a hard suck. “Gonna moan like that when I fuck you?”

   “Oh my go—fuck.”

   You could barely form words, your brain not even noticing that he’d stopped playing with your breast and his hands were already pushing your pants down your legs. He pulled away from you, helping you out of the jeans you wore and spreading your legs in front of him with his hands on your knees.

   “Gonna need an answer, darling,” he teased.

   “Yes,” you sighed, the words merely a breath. “Yes, I will.”

   “Mmm good.”

   And then one of his unfairly long fingers was on your panties, and you jumped as he circled your clit with the tip of his finger. His short nail dragged against the fabric and you tried to buck up into his touch, but he pulled away before you could.

   A long whine left your lips, and he smirked from between your legs.

   “Already so sensitive,” he smiled. He dragged to fingers from your folds to your clit, still over the fabric of your panties, before he pressed on the bundle of nerves with a wicked smile on his face. “Did I do this to you, love?”

   “Fuck!” you moaned, hips desperately bucking into his hand. “Yes, just for you.”

   “No one else makes you feel like this?”

   “No—fuck me, oh my god—no one else.”

   “So impatient,” he laughed. “Wanted to play with you for a bit, darling.”

   You whined at the thought, imagining Harrison toying with you, making you cum again and again with his fingers or his tongue, or maybe edging you until you begged him to fuck you, making your pussy clench though it was around nothing.

   “Please,” you whimpered, your hands coming up to rub at your breasts. You were desperate to feel anything. “Please fuck me, Harrison, please.”

   “Since you asked so nicely.”

   He was out of his clothes before you even had the chance to beg once more. His boxers were the last to go and you almost choked as you caught sight of his cock.

   It was perfect, long and girthy, a drop of precum already forming at the pink tip. You were hit with an urge to lick it away, but he brushed a finger through it and spread it over the length, stroking himself gently. He was already so hard and swollen and you could feel yourself throb at the thought of it inside you.

   “You ready, love?” he asked you.

   Harrison lowered himself in front of you, hooking his arms under your knees and tugging you closer to him.

   You nodded eagerly, hands extended to reach for him.

   “Please, Harrison,” you whined.

   “I’ve got you, love,” he muttered, one hand gripping yours as he intertwined your fingers and the other guiding his cock to your entrance. “I’ve got you.”

   He sank home in a single thrust, and you screamed at the stretch. He was so big, far bigger than anyone else you’d ever had but he was perfect. It was delicious, the feeling of him inside you. He was hot, hard, and heavy and you felt yourself clench around him.

   Harrison groaned as he felt you spasm. He lowered himself above you, pressing his nose under your chin.

   “So fucking tight,” he moaned. “Fucking amazing.”

   “Move,” you whimpered, hands in his hair. “Please.”

   “Don’t wanna cum right away, love,” he laughed. “You that desperate for me?”

   “Fuck, yes.”

   His teeth found your throat, sucking the sting away and leaving a purpling mark behind as he pulled out, and you whined at the feeling. But it was short-lived, because he thrust back in again, starting a steady pace of thrusts that had your hands shaking and your abdomen tensed with each brush of his cock against your g-spot.

   You were moaning like a wanton whore, loud and embarrassing in any other situation but with the weight of Harrison inside you, it seemed fitting. Whiny moans, his name spilling from your lips like a prayer, hymns of “please” and “fuck” tumbling through the air between the two of you.

   “Fuck, you sound so beautiful, Y/N,” he moaned. “So perfect. Could cum just from hearing you say my name.”

   He was pounding into you then, hips slapping with a lewd echo of skin against skin. Your legs came up around his waist, your ankles crossing just above his ass. You pulled him by his hair gently until his face was level with yours and you kissed him fiercely, all pressure and lips mashing against teeth.

   His teeth closed around your bottom lip and tugged gently, lips sucking around it.

   “Fuck, darling,” he moaned. “So good.”

   But then he stopped.

   And as he did you whined out loud, a pained sound as you were left quivering and wanting. You gripped at his hair and tried to tug him closer, undulating your hips in a weak attempt to feel him moving inside of you again.

   Harrison groaned, sucking at your jaw.

   “So desperate for my cock,” he murmured against your skin. “Don’t worry, love, I’ve got you. Turn over for me.”

   It was almost laughable how quickly you spun around underneath him after he pulled out, folding your arms under your head and arching your back. Your ass brushed against his cock and you heard him inhale sharply.

   You jumped when his large hand collided with the supple flesh of your cheek.

   “Such a good girl for me,” he said from above you. “You look gorgeous like this darling, ass in the air just begging me to fuck you.”

   “Please,” you whined. “Harrison, please.”

   You turned your head in order to see him, cheek pressed against the mattress. You saw him stroking himself slowly as his other hand kneaded your ass. His hand came down in another quick slap and you mewled, pressing back against him. He rubbed the handprint out with his palm before he lined himself up and sunk back into you again, hands coming down around your head to hold himself up. You felt his hot breath against your shoulder blades before he pressed an open-mouthed kiss between them, just along your spine.

   “So fucking perfect, baby,” he sighed. “Feel so fucking good around me.”

   You moaned your response, bringing a hand up to grip at his hair. He let you guide him down as you turned your head, his mouth finding yours as he continued to pound into you from behind. Your voice shook as you whined into his mouth.

   “Fuck,” you breathed. “Fuck, Harrison I—”

   Your words were cut off with a loud shriek, your head turning back to face forward as you bit the pillow in order to silence yourself.

   The only sounds you could hear were your own muffled cries and the sound of Harrison’s hips slamming against your ass over and over and over. You could feel your wetness dripping down your thighs and onto the sheets below you. It didn’t look like he would stop any time soon.

   But you didn’t want him to.

   “Gonna cum for me, baby?” he murmured.

   You nodded desperately into the pillow, turning to look at him with teary eyes. The pleasure almost had you crying.

   One of his hands reached around your front, fingers rubbing at your clit gently with just enough pressure to have you whimpering into the pillows under him. He hadn’t relented on the pace, still ruthlessly drilling into you with his cock. And with the added stimulation to your clit, you were almost coming undone in an instant.

   “H-Harrison,” you panted. “Gonna cum. Gonna fucking cum, oh my God.”

   “Yeah, love?” He was panting too, breaths heavy against the back of your neck. “God, you’re amazing.”

   Your thighs were shaking around him and your head was thrown back, so close to the edge and so close to tipping over.

   “Cum for me, Y/N,” he whispered into your ear. “Cum all over my cock.”

   With a pinched groan and a high pitched squeal, you came all over him as your hips stuttered against his hand and over his cock. Your head fell forward against the mattress with a groan.

   “Fuck, baby,” he groaned. “I can feel you clenching around me. Did I make you cum that hard? So hard just for me?”

   “Please,” you whimpered. “Harrison.”

   “Don’t worry, darling. I’m right behind you.”

   And as if on cue, his hips began to stutter as he started groaning against your neck, a loud guttural moan escaping his lips as he stilled inside you. You felt the warmth of him inside you, painting your walls and you sighed in contentment.

   “Oh, fuck,” he moaned, dragging out the word, pressing his hips into your ass as he rode out his orgasm.

   He groaned as he pulled out. He gently flipped you onto your back, picking up his shirt from the floor and pressing it under your ass to catch the fluid that seeped from your folds. You laughed tiredly as he did so, and he shot you a smile.

   “Towels are too far,” he explained.

   Harrison took his time cleaning you up. You were already drowsy, hand running through his hair and petting him gently as he wiped his cum away. You winced a couple of times, your folds still sensitive and your pussy still throbbing from the aftermath of your orgasm but it was… calming.

   When he was done, he threw the shirt into his hamper, gripping you close to his chest and laughing as he pulled you up to his pillows.

   “That was,” he began, curling his body around yours and bringing a knee up between your thighs. “The best sex I’ve ever had.”

   “Shut up,” you muttered. Your cheeks were still red.

   He kissed the back of your neck, sighing as he settled into a comfortable position. “Never.”

   From somewhere on the floor, there was the buzz of a phone. Harrison groaned from behind you.

   “I’ll grab it,” you muttered, reaching down until you felt the fabric of his pants and tugged it up.

   Patting around it until you felt the weight of his phone, you tugged it out of the pocket and struggled to find the button to turn it on because who has an Android anymore?

   Glancing at the screen, you laughed out loud as you read the most recent text notification. Harrison peeked up from over your shoulder, and though you couldn’t see it, you knew his eyes grew wide as he saw it.

Tom: how’d it go? you tell her how you feel yet? it’s hard getting you two alone, you know

   Reaching over, he pulled the phone from your hands, muttering “fucking dickhead” under his breath.

   “You weren’t meant to see that,” he admitted.

   “Yeah, maybe,” you admitted, turning over in his arms so you could face. You gripped his cheeks, pressing a soft kiss to his nose.

   He smiled gently at you.

   “But I’m glad I did.”

━━━━━━━━

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[leeuwchen]

17 for Ringsy, please?

Hello Anon, not sure if you wanted 17 for Angst, Fluff or Misc. so I simply tried to put all of them into one prompt. It got a bit out of hand, I guess, and I was quite a bit soap-nostalgic along the way, but here it is [it does include spoilers and speculations about how things might turn out for some of the Schillerallee residents during the next weeks]If you don’t hug me right now, I think I might fall apartI’m here for youOkay, so maybe I didn’t see that coming It’s weird being inside the bakery these days. The room is as bright as usual, the walls painted in light colours, the pleasant smell of bread and rolls and the intoxicating smell of coffee hanging in the air. Still, there is this sombre tension radiating from behind the counter where Irene Weigel’s picture has been put up next to that of her late husband Wolfgang, all shiny and new and looking like it doesn’t belong there. Or maybe it’s just him adjusting badly to change. Easy knows that Saskia has struggled with the decision of putting the picture there, fearing it would unnecessarily hurt Robert even more than he is hurting already but he was all for it - telling Saskia that this was where Irene belonged, that it was all about the legacy of the place. So now she has joined her first husband in watching their bakery live on smilingly but the grave tension in the room remains and as Easy is watching Saskia strolling around restlessly behind the counter, he can’t shake off the feeling once more that there’s something else behind it than just Irene passing away. The soft sound of the shop`s doorbell lets him turn around and for a moment everything is – well – easy as Ringo is walking in, as gorgeous as ever, casually gesturing to a sign on the left-hand side of the store to place his order with Antoine and then letting himself slump onto the seat next to Easy, sighing deeply, obviously in sync with the room’s general mood. 

“So I guess, your interview didn’t go well?” 

Ringo nods tiredly. 

“Let’s just say that with players like Huber in my neck and the Richters out wanting my head and Spohn still hating my ass, it is hard to get a fair review.” 

“I’m sorry, honey.” 

He lightly brushes his hand through Ringo’s hair and feels the slight turn of his husband’s head as he is leaning into the touch. 

“Don’t worry about me, okay? Even if there is just one decent job they can’t meddle with, I swear to you I’m going to find it and have the last laugh!”

“Well, I know at least one person who wouldn’t care for anything that Huber, the Richters or Spohn says…”

Ringo raises one eyebrow warningly. They have been over this more than once and as for now it has always been in a light-hearted way but Easy knows that this could change in an instant if Ringo feels too hassled.

“I know, you are all for it, Easy, but… as much as I appreciate Paco wanting to do that… I’m just not made for it. The Turnhalle was fun… the best of times… but I never wanted that for life. It’s just not… you know… it’s not or me.”

“I know”, Easy says with a smile, then – because sometimes when Ringo gets like this, he just can’t help himself but has to tease him – he adds innocently: “Then again, you thought you wouldn’t be one to marry either and I have it on good authority that you are very good at it.” Before Ringo can react, Leni has walked up to them, placing his order in front of him. Smiling deviously, he looks up to her. “Can you believe it? Your stepfather just referred to himself as an authority figure. Weird, huh?” But Leni just smiles back at him. “You know, I listen to him.” She leans down a bit, her voice almost a whisper now. “And so do you.” Ringo shakes his head sullenly. “Yeah yeah, just gang up on me, will you? I’m still not going to open a new gym with your old man.” Amused by his sudden moodiness Leni pats Ringo’s shoulder pitingly.

“You mean, you are not going to open a new gym with my dad for now, right?”

“That’s it, I want to speak to your boss. You are openly bullying your customers, you little…”

The smile disappears from Leni’s face. “Actually, so would I. But Saskia has left again for no reas-“ Before she is able to finish her sentence, a customer walks in and smiling apologetically Leni hurries behind the counter to take his order. “Doesn’t sound like Saskia at all, does it? I really wonder what’s behind it”, Easy murmurs worried but Ringo just shrugs. “Cheating. That’s what behind it. I’m telling you.” Easy rolls his eyes.

“Oh yeah, I forgot. Because you could read that in Paco’s face when we asked him what was wrong with her.”   

 “Yes. I could indeed.” 

“And if you are such a master of this art, Hase, with whom did she sleep then?”

Ringo takes a croissant from his dish and turns it around thoughtfully.

“Maybe it’s Antoine. I mean, a man who can bake heavenly stuff like that…”

“You better not have this then.”

With a swift move Easy tries to capture the pastry but his husband is quicker.

“Oi! No need to get all watchful, Bärchen, all I am saying is that the whole love at first sight, swept me from my feet, shiny white knight stuff they had going on maybe isn’t the thing to last forever, you know.”

Easy sighs deeply but can’t hide his amusement. Teasingly his hand gestures towards Ringo while addressing an imaginary audience.

“And today’s key-note speaker on our ‘Romance is dead’-panel… Richard Beckmann!”

Just as Ringo opens his mouth to shoot back an answer, his cell phone vibrates, and he takes it out to check the message. Now in a bad mood again, he pushes it back inside his pocket only seconds later. 

“Well, romance might not be completely dead but my job life sure is. Took them about what… 45 minutes to turn me down. That’s a new record.”

Once more Easy reaches out and lets his hand slide through Ringo’s soft hair who closes his eyes thankfully for a few moments, but this time doesn’t lean into his husband’s touch and instead starts to straighten his tie and suit as if taking care of his armour before he continues to eat in silence. 

It’s early in the evening and for the last twenty minutes Easy has been standing inside the kiosk, staring out of the window, contemplating the street’s fate… or something like that. He is a positive person in general and he knows that moodiness doesn’t suit him well, but he just can’t put his finger on what got into him today. There have always been bad times at Schillerallee 10. They’ve had to let people go, lost people, hated people, been at each other’s throats over small things or huge betrayal but still - just today - this one feels like the big one. With Irene dead, the Weigels in mourning, Saskia being all weird after probably (Ringo might be on to something here) cheating on Jakob, Bambi and Sina broken up after Sina’s secret abortion, Bambi not talking to either Tobias or Vivien because they’ve known about it, Sina dissociating herself from everyone including her family, Conor on the run or whatever got into him after breaking up with Eva and almost killing his own father, Leni going from sadness to defiantness over her mother’s visit, that strange Luke guy lurking around, Ute and Huber constantly fighting, Huber Bau going to the dogs without Ringo and Ringo constantly being turned down for no other reason than having made enemies for doing the right thing it’s hard to see the silver lining. 

As if to prove him right a lanky shadow appears on the threshold, blocking most of the light coming from there. Ringo is wearing his sports clothes and he must have been running hard because he looks like hell – the kind of hell that makes you consider giving up heaven for it but still… hell. “Water, please”, he begs calmly and after Easy has given him a bottle he empties it in one long greedy gulp before focussing his blue eyes on his husband. “Who died and made you king of the funeral party?” Realising what he has just said, Ringo quickly shakes his head while pinching his own nose bridge with both thumb and index finger. “I’m sorry, that was… highly inappropriate. I just wanted to know why you look so glum. What happened?” Easy shrugs his shoulders.

“Nothing really. But I guess… somehow… all the sadness around me has made me sad, too. Kind of sympathy sadness, you know?”

“I see. That’s why I try not to have too much sympathy for people in general. Makes your life easier. But… since I married the most empathetic guy in the world, and I DO have LOTS of sympathy for him… let me help you. What exactly is making you sad?”

Easy starts looking around the inside of the kiosk feeling a bit clueless. Of course, he loves Ringo and his husband has been an understanding, soothing ally to him in more than one case but maybe this one is a bit out of Ringo’s league… too weird to understand, especially when you are a very structured controller. “Easy?” So apparently, he is not getting out of this by just looking around. He takes a deep breath.

“I know it’s silly, but I just can’t deal with everyone around here being sad. The Weigels understandably and Sina and Bambi of course, but it’s not only them… Ute, Eva, Leni, you…”     

“I’m not sad. I’m frustrated.”          

“But that’s the same thing really.”

Ringo is still leaning against the doorframe but now he has crossed his arms and narrowed his eyes determinedly.

“No, it really isn’t. I know that everyone thinks that I don’t have a lot of emotions and I quite agree but the emotions I have I want to have categorized correctly and I am not sad. I am married to the most wonderful man in the world which is something I would have never believed to happen. I live in a flat share with my stupid annoying idiotic half-brother and I actual enjoy it which is likewise a complete miracle. And in the flat next to us where - as I would have stated just three years ago - only boring losers and gullible push overs live, there are my best friend and his teenage daughter who somehow is my stepdaughter as well and in the maybe most absurd twist in my life I love that too. So yes, being out of work is as frustrating an experience as it ever was but I am not sad. In fact, I am happier than I have ever been in my entire life.”

For a few seconds Easy doesn’t know what to say and he wonders if there will ever be a day, he stops underestimating what greatness and candour and kindness Richard Beckmann is capable of. All of a sudden, all the glumness is gone… well almost gone. There is one more thing ne needs, however.

“If you don’t hug me right now, I think I might fall apart.”     

“I’m all sweaty, Easy.”          

“I don’t care.”

With a swift movement Ringo is inside the kiosk, pressing himself against Easy who equally slings his arms around the – indeed sweaty – body. For a minute or two they are just standing there     before Easy starts to worry about the icy air and Ringo catching a cold in his wet clothes. Carefully one of his hand slips underneath the damp T-Shirt caressing the cold skin of his husband’s back.        

“And why have you been running like this?”

Sighing deeply Ringo lets go of him and takes one step back. 

“I talked to Bambi today. Now that he and Sina are broken up, he wants to sell the house and asked me if I would handle it on his behalf.”     

“That doesn’t sound too bad.”

“It isn’t bad at all. He would even retransfer the money I had to pay him for sabotaging the house if I sold it at a good price.”     

“And that’s a problem?”

“Not really, no. But it means selling it to Huber after all.”

“Oh, I see. Is there no other contractor who would be interested? You said it was a prime spot for a new business park, didn’t you?”

“There would be others, yes, but not right away and Bambi wants it to be done quickly. Huber already has – thanks to me – all the numbers and calculations ready so there was no other option than calling him.”

“Oooh”, Easy exclaims, finally understanding the problem. Sure, there isn’t an open war going on between Ringo and his former boss. Huber even had a good time at their wedding and with the kiosk save and sound Ringo had at least achieved one victory and therefore renounced from taking revenge but still, making a business call to his former work place must have hit his husband like a punch in the guts. “Didn’t he buy then?” Ringo snorts.

“Oh, he bought within a second and for a mighty good price without thinking twice.”

“But he didn’t offer you your job back?”, Easy asks tensely, supposing that somewhere deep down this is still what Ringo would want to happen. The other’s mouth twists into a sarcastic sneer.

“He did. Sort of. Of course, since my lack of loyalty is a given fact and the only reason, he is even considering doing so is the stroke of luck I’ve had with Bambi’s house, he announced right away that I would be demoted until I have proven myself worthy of the second chance.”

“He always was and always will be an asshole, Ringo. His business is going down without you.”

“Tell me about it. Still, since we disagreed strongly on who would be giving whom a second chance, I wished him good luck with Britta Schönfeld in charge of controlling and hung up. Then – as usual - I panicked and almost called him back but stopped myself from doing so and went for a run even though the thing’s not worth catching a cold for.”

“You could have come to me instead. I’m here for you.”

Grinning, Ringo nudges his nose against Easy’s.

“I know that, you idiot. But I thought since you are the only provider in our household, I shouldn’t keep you from making money. Had I of course known that you are standing here, scaring the customers away with that rainy-day face of yours, I would have come earlier.”

“You are very funny, you know that? But I didn’t marry you for being funny.”

“Course not. But I still think you could need some help around here.”          

“What do you mean? I’ve got Paco and Gianni…”

“Yeah, but they are only here when you are not. I meant someone to help you when you get all blue all of a sudden these days. Someone funny maybe.”     

“Are you applying for a job you just made up?”

“Yes. And before you ask… I myself cannot believe I’m that desperate for some work.”

With a serious look on his face, Easy scans Ringo’s outfit. 

“And I cannot believe that you would wear this to a job interview, but I guess you could lose these clothes quickly enough.”

Taken off guard, Ringo raises one eyebrow and slightly turns his head, opening his mouth twice without saying something before he recovers.     

“Okay, so maybe I didn’t see that coming.”               

“Neither did we.”

Without either Ringo or Easy noticing Tobias and Vivien have appeared in front of the window, looking inside now. Frowning, Tobias waves one hand through the air. 

“Sorry to interrupt your kiosk sex talk and everything but Paco and Leni invited the four of us over. Apparently, they have been making tapas all afternoon and stuff got out of hands and now they are having a little get together with food, wine and really bad movies… or let’s say, with your playlist, Easy.”

The addressee furrows his brows. Having eaten nothing since breakfast he could indeed do with some food. But that is no reason to let Tobias get away with insulting his taste in movies. 

“Coming from someone who likes to watch something called Naked Space Patrol that’s really harsh, Kotzmeister, so be thankful I like to spend time with you anyway. Let me just close the kiosk and I’ll be ready.” 

Curiously he looks at Ringo, hoping his husband won’t feel pushed by his spontaneous decision but said husband is halfway through the door already. “I’ll just hit the shower then and be over after.” Satisfied Tobias nods. “Take your time. Stinker will have to hit the park first anyway.” The small dog barks in agreement. “And since his hubby sneaked out of it, I’ll help Easy pack up around here”, Vivien offers and starts taking down the magazines from the kiosk’s front wall. 

As Easy steps out of the small building seconds later to get the ketchup bottles from the tables, he can still see Tobias walking away to the park, using his walking stick only every other step while Stinker is eyeing his owner watchful as if to make sure that the lawyer isn’t overestimating his strength. Turning his head a bit, Easy eyes catch Ringo striding into the inner yard of their house, taking huge, rather bouncy steps clearly looking forward to an evening with food, friends and fun – well, mostly food probably – but still, taking all these things into account, Easy can’t help but think that even the gloomiest of times aren’t  that bad when you are living at Schillerallee 10.

[darkdevasofdestruction]

Chisaki Kai x Hacker!Fem!S/O

Who would have thought that such things as arranged marriages would still be a thing in a modern era like ours? She vehemently refused, at first, but nobody was to cross her father or they will have it bad, so after some rather peculiar persuasion, she gave in and accepted to meet her future husband, being all dressed up nicely like a harmless, innocent girl who has been locked away from the world her whole life and knew nothing about its true colours. 

 That was, however, the farthest thing from the truth. 

 As she meekly bowed at him in a sign to show respect, which he returned, only stealing a lingering glance at her petite form and angelic face.   He knew people shouldn’t be judged by their appearances, so he refused to believe she doesn’t hide something, no matter how little, behind her shy facade.

After the courtesies were made, her father made her leave the room so they could discuss the serious, adult business that she had no need to know about. At the end of the conversation, they shook hands, agreeing to collaborate and the girl's butlers were to help her move into Chisaki's hideout. Of course, at the end of that, all but one butler was killed, that one which was to be by her side at all costs and make sure her all needs are seen for. Thankfully, Chisaki was very formal and clearly a very busy man, so he let the girl go out and do whatever she wanted, accompanied by her butler, so she wouldn't lack anything or be locked in a cage for no reason. Chisaki was a rich man, being the leader of the Yakuza, but so was she, coming from a family with an influencial father in the underground world, so her card was always filled with buckets of money, being able to buy just about anything her heart desired. But there was one thing she couldn't afford despite all the money in the world- And that was love and friendship. Those words were so foreign to her that she completely forgot they exist in the dictionary, being fine with just being a completely mysterious vixen who can find any information desired and can get away with it, pretending to be a little oblivious angel...Which, in truth, wasn’t too far away from reality. However, some kind of friendship seemed to flourish between her and his associates, mostly Setsuno and Chrono, for some reason still unknown to the rest and even to them. One day she was staying on the sofa, fooling around on social media as she usually did, when she noticed Setsuno having a hard time at something - Something that seemed to be hacking, of all things. 

Y/N: Hey, Harry Potter, how are you? Setsuno: Uh...Top Secret stuff, sorry miss. Y/N: Don't bother, call me Y/N. Anyways, you seem to be struggling with this sort of coding. Setsuno: Yes, well, I'm not the best hacker in the world and this coding is something I've never encountered before. Y/N: And to be fair, your outdated computer isn't doing you any favours either. Setsuno: Outdated? It's the last technology! Y/N:*smiles* Not for me. 

With a grin, she ran to get her laptop and put it on the table next to Setsuno's computer, transferred everything needed into her laptop and started doing her magic, leaving the man awestruck at the girl who broke into the most secret society's own database without even breaking a sweat. 

Setsuno: How did you do that? Y/N: Well, when you try to hack into international databases, you have to understand that the conventional ideas of hacking will be completely erased. What I did was combine a ton of math stuff, unlock tons of invisible locks with those math equations, then continue byte by byte with each and every code apart, to make it subtle and appear as if nobody got access to it. Setsuno: Whoa... Y/N: It's pretty simple once you get the hang of it. How do you think I get all that money? NASA is filthy rich. Setsuno: *jaw drop* Teach me, master. Y/N: Oh, sure! I'm always happy to help people with anything I can, which is usually not much. But if you want me to teach you today, you have to bring me food or snacks 'cause I can't function properly otherwise. Setsuno: *laughs* Very well, I'll keep in mind how to bribe you from now on.

Unknown to either of them, however, Chisaki was watching from a corner, an eyebrow arched as the girl piqued his interest, wondering how much more can she surprise him and even what else can she be hiding. For that, he invited her for a drink in a private room of the hideout where Shin was acting as a “butler” for some reason unknown to her, since there were already enough capable people who could do that.

Despite that, she only kept a sincere and serene smile on her face, looking down at her hands as she fidgeted anxiously with her fingers, waiting for Chisaki to speak.

Chisaki: Wine? Y/N: *shakes head* I don’t want to sound pretentious, but I don’t drink alcohol. Chisaki: Oh? You’d be the first person to hear say that. Y/N: *smiles* It’s not for my tastes. I prefer sweet flavours like fruit juice or simply water. Should’ve seen my father’s face when he realised I won’t touch alcohol...*amused breathe* Chisaki: I thought fathers who had daughters were strict when it came to the adult vices. Y/N: *grins* Not when your father wants to marry you off to overly-sophisticated individuals. I almost pity him for not having an heir, but that’s none of my business anymore. Chisaki: Your words are peculiar. He said you’re his only child. Y/N: Oh, but I am, he didn’t lie to you. Chisaki: Then aren’t you the only person capable of being his heir? Y/N: *smiles* Oh, dear Chisaki...You see, my father never lies...But he evades the truth so things will be in his favour. Why do you think I’m here? Chisaki: It seems like you know more than he thinks you do. Y/N: I learnt how to unlock my room with a hairclip. He thinks I only stayed trapped in my room, unless told otherwise. *shakes head* Poor man, if only he knew... Chisaki: *raises an eyebrow* I think we have some important things to discuss, Y/N. Y/N: *sighs* You know...I never get attached to people, but for some reason, I seem to care for you, otherwise I wouldn’t have let those key words slip for you to understand the situation. Chisaki: Your father promised a business deal if I were to marry you, are you aware of that? Y/N: *snorts* Of course I do, who do you think I am? You’re the 7th person I’m supposed to marry for the same reasons.*smiles* But to be fair, I kinda like it here. Despite their differences, the people here are pretty nice...Even if they act like that towards me because you ordered them to. Chisaki: I see you are aware of that as well. Y/N: Of course I do. Reading people isn’t difficult, you know? Even you, Chisaki. You thought that by marrying me, the company is going to be yours as soon as my father died...Or was killed, and I inherited it...Am I wrong? Chisaki: No. Y/N: Let’s say I value my life enough to tell you the truth. At least, if I am to die, you won’t have to be disappointed that you won’t get the company and the money. Chisaki: Then why did he send you away? Y/N: Because I’m not a boy, of course. He didn’t know how to get rid of me faster, so he used the whole marriage thing as a pretext for idiots to catch the bait.

But as soon as she sighed and looked away, mentioning the word “idiots”, Shin already had her by the throat, squeezing the life out of her mercilessly.

Chisaki: Nemoto, that’s enough. Leave her alone. Shin: But Chisaki, she called you an idiot! Chisaki: And she was right to do so. On the other hand, she confessed the truth, so she deserves to live.

Shin only tsked, glaring at the girl as he let her fall to the floor, gasping for air. Weirdly enough, she only chuckled and got up, dusting herself and smiled, somehow defiantly, at the one who tried to kill her.

Y/N: Now, now, Shin, don’t you know it’s not nice to touch married women? Have some manners, will you?  Shin: Why, you-! Chisaki: Leave. Shin: But- Chisaki: Now. The girl had to look away to hide the satisfaction on her face, when she was brought back to reality as her husband called out her name.

Chisaki: What is your Quirk, then? Y/N: Oh, you want to know? I mean, it’s nothing flashy or interesting...Which is why I’m sure he avoided that topic. Chisaki: I want to know. Y/N: How about I show you?

He only nodded, making the girl stand up and put her hands under his, bringing them together and much to his surprise, a small white flower began to grow from his palms, making his eyes widen in surprise, not having expected something so pure and innocent. Even more shocking was, however, how the once symbol of purity, the little frail snowdrop vanished in a black mist, scattering away as if it was never there.

Chisaki: What is your Quirk exactly? Y/N: I don’t know for sure...But I’ve been able to do this since forever. When you’re stuck between 4 walls all the time, you start to learn how to cherish the little things. Chisaki: You may just come in handy...

As usual, Y/N spent the whole weekend outside, experiencing the beauty of life and the happiness it brings. For her, only being able to see the light of the brilliant sun was enough to make her grin and have no worries in the world. Now that she’s out and can do whatever she wants, she used this opportunity to go to the nearest Starbucks and try out one of the chocolate frappes, since they were hyped all over social media, and now she could Snap all she wanted as well, very proud that they spelled her name correctly.

What she wasn’t expecting, however, was to be tapped on the shoulder as a gorgeous girl with long red hair, emerald green eyes and a mischievous smirk sat next to her, her own frappe placed on the table, as she looked at Y/N like a vixen ready to approach her pray.

-?-: Hello, stranger. You must be knew here. I’m Kitsune. And you~? Y/N: Oh uh...I’m Y/N, nice to meet you, Kitsune! May I help you in any way? Kitsune: Mhhh not really...I just wanted to say hi to the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen. You come here often? Y/N: *eyes widen* O-Oh...! Thank you, Kitsune, but you’re much more beautiful than me! And well...You could say that I’m new in town. Are you from here? Kitsune: *smirks* How about I show you around? I know this place like the back of my hand. Y/N: Sounds like a plan!

The red head only smiled in satisfaction as she grabbed the h/c-haired girl by the hand, intertwining her fingers with hers and started showing her around the city, the important places, the shopping areas, the pubs, where all the teenagers gathered and all the important things a young adult would want to know to have fun. At the same time, the fox-like girl never once let go of Y/N’s hand, until the sun started to set.

Y/N: Kitsune-chan, could you bring me back to the Starbucks? It’s getting late, I have to go home... Kitsune: Awwww, no, that’s too bad! How about I get you back home...After we go to a pub? Come on, just a little bit of fun, what could go wrong? Y/N: Uhm...Well...I’ve never...Y’know... Kitsune: Oh, you’ve never had proper fun before? How about I show you what life is about?  Y/N: I mean...I don’t know...I... Kitsune: Just this once, okay? Come on, it will be fun. You never know what you like until you try it at least once, right~? Y/N: Ah...Well...I guess you’re right. Okay then, lead the way! Kitsune: That’s what I like about you, love, you’re always willing to try out something new. Let’s go!

Y/N could feel her heart beating faster and faster, both from feeling an immense amount of warmth for the person who’s willing to show her the world, but for the adrenaline of doing something she’s never done before. The unknown, the excitement, the new, the rush, the fun.

And all because she went out of the house and a gorgeous stranger was kind and daring enough to start talking to her, a timid nobody like her who was like a child, still afraid of her own shadow.

The way the blinding, colourful light would shine on her face, her graceful yet somehow provocative moves, the way she’d pull on her hands, bringing her closer, instead of drinking some stupid Coke, so she could dance with her, the way she kissed her on the lips with such passion, the red lipstick smeared on her face.

The way she convinced her to drink vodka cocktails with lots of juice to mask its bitter flavour until her head started to spin, the way she’d share her weed cigarettes with her, claiming that it would ease her fears and anxieties, that it would make her bolder, the sexy voice she’d use as she whispered in her ear to follow her back to the apartment, the way she’d straddle her waist and look down at her, so endearing, as her fingers softly touched every inch of her skin, removing each piece of clothing and peppering her with hot kisses, the shy sounds she’d let out without realising, completely lost in the bliss of the moment, the unknown yet nice sensation she’d feel in her heart as she held her tightly to her petite body.

Everything about her was perfect, like an angel guiding her through life to experience the vices every person her age should, without feeling any shame or regret because after all, this is what life is all about -

Having fun, living your life and being happy.

And those are the only things she’s been searching for so long. After all these years of seeking and desperately trying to find an answer, she found it, in the form of an enticing fire-kissed woman.

The only problem was that Chisaki Kai was a man who had relations everywhere and knew every little thing that moved in the country so of course he knew of everything that Y/N was doing. At first he didn’t bother with it, dismissing it as just another teenage girl having fun for the first time in her life...But it happened every weekend now. Y/N would leave home on Friday, meet up with this redhead and return on Monday morning as if nothing happened. In truth, she seemed much happier, like a weird euphoria took over her, brainwashed her into doing all the irrational things she shouldn’t do, but she was a mere tool in his plan and he couldn’t care less what happens to her as long as she’s alive.

But the question was...

                                  ...Why was he feeling so angry?

Her life is of no importance to him, so why does he feel so mad whenever he knows she’s with another? It was a dark feeling that he never experienced before and he just couldn’t wrap his head around it. Or rather said, he didn’t want to admit it. He had one weakness, and that was revolving around the great Sins. Greed, Wrath, Envy.

Chisaki was an intelligent man and knew just how to make this feeling disappear and make his fiancee come back to him willingly, a broken little thing, ready to give up all the foolishness that kept pissing him off without having to soil his hands too much. He had just the perfect plan for it.

“Don’t bother coming to meet me today, scrub, I’m not going to be there anymore. I finally found a proper Daddy who can really take care of me, so I don’t need your money anymore. Truth be told, your innocence was so annoying, but I had to put up with you. No more of that. I’m nobody’s mother or babysitter and I’m done being the one to teach you everything. I couldn’t care less about you or your feelings, so don’t bother contacting me again, or I’ll just block your number. Everything I said and done was a lie, just like the feelings you thought I had for you. I am a fox and that’s what we do. Fool idiots and steal their money. Bye ~ Kitsune “

Poor Y/N dropped her phone and fell back on her bed, sobbing uncontrollably as she could feel her heart being ripped in tiny tiny little pieces and stomped on, the pain crushing her completely.

If this is what love and happiness meant, then she wanted none of those.

It took her a few days to go back to her facade and try to go back into her passion, hacking, and help Setsuno out, as promised, as they were to hack into her father’s business and forge his signature so she could be the true heir, allowing Chisaki to have access to the money. To their surprise, as soon as they managed to get into the main base, a video of her father popped up, looking straight at them, taunting them.

“So I see that young punk Kai took action much faster than expected, I applaud your guts, kiddo, but that won’t be enough to defeat me! I am the only King of the Underground, not some green boy with daddy issues who relies on marriage contracts to get the money for his projects. You will never be able to defeat me! But I have to thank you, Kai, you let me get rid of that good-for-nothing daughter of mine and she was a great ploy for me to trick you into thinking I would actually give my money to some nobody who wants to kill me! Better luck next time, losers.”

It took less than 2 seconds for the girl to punch the computer monitor so hard that her hand was bleeding, making Setsuno worry, confused at what to do.

Y/N: Don’t fucking JOKE AROUND WITH ME! Urgh...That’s it...! I’m so done being walked on like a fucking doormat, always being seen as less than what I am. Fine, you want a war, you started it! But when you get burnt, don’t start crying for mercy, for you will see NONE of it! Setsuno: Y/N calm down! We have to tell Chisaki about this so we know what to do! Y/N: Forget it. Go tell him, I’m gonna get ready to destroy that place with a goddamn panzer. It didn’t take long for the fair haired man to run to his leader and tell him everything that happened, and for him to rush to where the girl was, slamming her on the wall, holding her hands so she wouldn’t move, his intimidating gaze, for the first time, not having any effect on her.

Y/N: What, Setsuno told you about the message my obsolete father sent to you indirectly? Chisaki: He did. Y/N: Good, then what’s your problem? We share the same goal - Forge his signature, get the money and kill him. Chisaki: You can’t rush like an idiot and expect results. Y/N: Why do you care? I don’t influence your plans in any way, correct? My capture or death would be of no significance to you. So tell me, Chisaki, why stop me? Chisaki: I have no obligation to answer to you. Y/N: Oh really? Then you have no obligation to control my life either! Let me kill myself by going to that place to rebel, what is there to lose? Chisaki: You’re not going anywhere until I come up with a plan and that’s final. Y/N: You’re really pissing me off, Chisaki. But fine, be that way!

The girl grumbled furiously, pushing him off her as she stomped her way back to her room, doing the only thing that could take her mind off of the whole ordeal.

Train her Quirk.

With the help of all his associates, Chisaki managed to make his way to the businessman’s office, where he was greeted by the man with a smirk on his face, but much to his shock, the girl was there as well, being held captive by her father, a knife at her neck, blood slowly falling down her pale skin. What confused him, however, was that the girl seemed anything but frightened. She was smirking as if she won.

Father: Ah, look who decided to show up! How are you feeling? Want some tea? Cookies? A little bit of victory, since you’ve never tasted it? Oh, come one, Kai, don’t look at me like that, you didn’t really think you could beat me, right? Especially not if your vanguard is my own daughter. What, you thought it would touch me? Horrible strategy, really. Chisaki: Give me the business and nobody gets hurt. Except for you. Father: You’re so dull, Kai. I guess the married man life isn’t for you, huh? What, this one didn’t satisfy your needs? You wanted more? I’m pretty sure you could at least afford THAT if you wanted. Y/N: Stop being so disgusting, you lech. I can’t believe we’re related... Father: I don’t speak to those with IQ lower than my shoe size. Y/N: You will be surprised- Father: Now, Kai, look how we’re gonna do things here. You can either save this useless kid and I will allow you to walk away unscratched...Or you can try to fight me and go against my unbeatable Quirk and watch her die. You choose. Either way, I win. Chisaki: Why are you so sure you’re going to win this? Father: Let me show you a small fraction of my power.

As he said that, he pointed to Chrono and without blinking, everyone watched Chrono fall to the ground, having no idea how he could do that. Setsuno went to search his pulse, but he shook his head, completely shocked by what happened. The girl only smirked wider, letting a dark chuckle escape as she extended her hand towards her dead friend. Chisaki then realised what was happening, having seen her Quirk manifest before, but not to such a huge extent and smirked in victory under his mask. This girl was a true trump card for his assets.

She was taking her father’s life essence and Chrono’s death mist and exchanged their places, making his associate get up and gasp for air, while her kin to shake and fall to the ground, coughing blood, eyes webbed with the veil of death.

As she wiped the stray bead of sweat that formed on her forehead, trying to catch her breath, she hid her physical exhaustion by plopping on the office chair and starting to forge all documents so his death won’t be in vain.

Y/N: Sorry about that, Chrono, but hey, at least you’re alive, right? Chisaki: They’re not here anymore. Y/N: Oh, you sent them away. Didn’t notice that. Anyways, I’m almost done here. Chisaki: Well played. Y/N: *shrugs* Could have been better, but I can’t complain. Here, all done, now let’s get out of here. Chisaki: *nods* This place is the filthiest I’ve ever been to. Y/N: Tell me about it...

As she got up, however, a wave of nausea made her stumble and almost fall to the ground, were it not for her fiancee who caught her just in time. The girl muttered that she over-used her Quirk and this was a usual side-effect since she wasn’t used to exerting it to such a great extent, making the Yakuza leader only sigh, picking her up bridal style, which made her bite her lip, memories of her ex-lover flooding her mind like a hurricane damaging everything in its way.

All the way to the base she kept asking herself what was going to happen. Now that the company is hers, Kai’s going to write the official papers to marry her, so he could have full access to the money. But what about her? It’s true, she will live a rich life, as usual, but what about everything else? He is a cold, cruel man who only thinks about his goals, but she could feel a small, but existent speck of light in his soul, so maybe - Just maybe....

As soon as they got back to the hideout he placed her on her bed so she could rest, but before she could blink, he fixed her with his intense gaze that could kill a man with no problem.

Chisaki: You are mine now and nobody’s going to touch you again. What were you thinking, going like that without a plan? You almost ruine- Y/N: Who said I had no plan? Please, I’ve known that wretch since forever and I had the advantage of knowing his Quirk, while he didn’t know mine. I knew he was going to kill one of your guys to show off his powers, that’s just the kind of guy he was, always begging for validation and power, so...You saw what happened. Don’t underestimate me, Chisaki Kai, I am your wife after all *winks*.

He only looked at her, no emotion shown on his face, making her look away, uncomfortable, before he threw away his mask and kissed her roughly, making the girl lose her mind completely. What was going on? Is this really Chisaki? What am I going to do? Is my heart capable of holding a person dear to me, after what happened?

Y/N: So...I guess we’re official now? Chisaki: I don’t take no for an answer. Y/N: Lucky me, I wasn’t going to refuse.

With eyes still glossy and lost from his actions, she cupped his face and kissed him with just as much passion and need as he did, putting aside every bad thing that happened, completely forgetting about the redhead she once loved.

Unknown to her, however, Chisaki could only smirk internally knowing that she suspected nothing and had no idea that the fox girl was actually long dead and that he wrote the text, out of unadmitted jealousy, now feeling much more superior.

Chisaki Kai, the leader of the Yakuza, ALWAYS gets what he wants, no matter what.

And Y/N L/N was his.