#the best part about the episode me thinks

[jobean12-blog]

Hanging by a Moment

Pairing: Joel Miller x female reader

Word Count: 5K

Summary: Joel's wanted you since the moment he saw you...what will it take for him to make a move.

Author's Note: Between Cannes this weekend and the upcoming episode six of TLOU 2 I'm pretty much useless and my life revolves around the next Pedro pic/gif/vid that will ruin me. It's fine though. I had to channel it somewhere so here's some tension and smut and all the good stuff. Thank you all so much for reading! Much love always! ❤️❤️❤️Divider by the lovely @firefly-graphics thank you Daisy! 🥰

Warnings: lots of tension, some fun, some fluff, flirting, meddling Tommy and Ellie in the best way, fingering, oral (f rec), unprotected p in v (wrap it in rl pls), light dirty talk and praise, Joel and his guitar

“Ellie’s out on patrol. Ben is inside drawing…what has you smiling like that?”

Tommy’s question goes unanswered as Joel continues staring straight ahead, his eyes bright and crinkled at the corners. Tommy turns to follow Joel’s gaze and let’s out a snort of laughter.

“No fuckin’ way brother,” Tommy says as he claps Joel on the back. “Good for you.”

Joel stares a second longer then swings his eyes to Tommy. “Good for me what?”

Tommy looks between you and Joel. “I’ve only seen you smile like that at two people, and neither are here, so…I’m glad you finally made a move.”

“I…what? I didn’t…do anything,” Joel stumbles.

Tommy frowns. “Then why are you starin’ like she belongs to you.”

Before Joel can reply you part with Dina and start walking toward the two men.

“Hi,” you say to them then turn your eyes to Joel. “I think I found something you can use to file those saddle slots.”

Joel’s mouth lifts into a soft smile. “Thanks,” he says.

“I’ll bring it by after lunch,” you tell him.

“Saddle slots?” Tommy asks as he watches Joel watch you walk away.

“For the guitar,” Joel grumbles before he turns on his heel.

Your knock goes unanswered, so you gently push the door open and call his name. Still no answer but you hear the tap of wood and the plucking of strings as you head toward the living room.

“Joel?”

He spins around, his safety glasses slipping down his nose.

“Hey,” he says gruffly. “I didn’t hear you come in.”

“I knocked but I figured that. I have the file.”

You hold up the tool and he smiles.

He wipes his hands on his jeans and reaches out for it. You watch in silence as he carefully files down the edges of the saddle slots, every so often blowing over the wood to clear the shavings.

“I don’t know what you’re doing but it looks really beautiful already.”

When his eyes meets yours they’re soft and his expression filled with gratitude . “I hope she likes it.”

“She will,” you assure him. “Will you teach her to play?”

“If she’ll let me,” he says lightly.

You step closer and lean over the instrument, lifting a hand to lightly run it along the shiny wood. Your next words of admiration are cut short because his warm, strong hand covers yours, guiding it down the neck of the instrument and over the curve of the body.

“The top is made of a softwood, probably cedar and the sides and back a hardwood like mahogany,” he explains, his hand still leading yours.

The feel of him more than his words shocks you silent and you hold your breath.

“The different types of wood present different tones,” he continues.

You find yourself leaning into him subconsciously, and he squeezes your hand before releasing it.

“I can’t wait to hear you play it,” you whisper, still recovering from the contact of his skin.

“What time are Ellie and I leaving tomorrow?” Joel ask Tommy as they add more hay to the horse stables.

“Eight am sharp,” Tommy says with a smirk.

“What’s that about?” Joel says frowning.

Tommy shrugs but his smile widens as Ellie approaches.

“Did you tell him?” she asks Tommy, her eyes sparkling.

“Tell me what?” Joel grumbles as he rests his hands on his hips.

“You’re doing patrol tomorrow, but not with me,” Ellie says excitedly.

“What do you mean?” Joel asks, his tone dangerously low. “You’re not thinkin’ of goin’ out on your own…?”

“No,” Ellie says, waving him off. “I’m staying behind to train with Jesse.”

“I don’t understand,” Joel says with an exasperated sigh. “Why can’t you two just be straight with me.”

“I’m giving you a chance to make your move brother,” Tommy says with a wink.

The next morning with the fog of a humid night still hanging in the air you wait by the gate for Joel. The clip clop of hooves turns your head, and you see him leading Shimmer your way.

“Only one horse?” you say as you pat Shimmer’s side.

Joel’s gaze finds yours and his dark brown eyes stare at you so unapologetically it unnerves you in a way.

“Tommy says the others need rest.”

You give him a shaky smile and wait as he lifts himself onto the horse and then offers you his hand. You take it, his warm and calloused fingers strong around yours as he helps you up behind him.

“Comfortable?” he asks once you’re settled.

“Yes,” you say quietly, all at once aware of every sense- the way you’re pressed up against Joel’s back, the cool morning breeze along your heated skin, the smell of spice and leather.

You remain quiet for most of the ride, enjoying the warmth from the rising sun and the way it plays off the mountainsides, bathing the newly growing flowers and vegetation in a soft glow. The sounds of birds chirping and animals scurrying made things feel almost…normal.

“I didn’t realize how much I’ve missed springtime…and the fact that all the snow ‘s melted.”

You feel him laugh. “You’re tellin’ me. We never saw snow in Texas.”

It’s a quiet patrol and you and Joel pass the time with easy conversation about whatever comes to mind but when midday hits the sun is strong overhead and you’re both hot and in need of water. He stops Shimmer by a small stream and helps you off, first taking your hand then surprisingly grasping your waist, slowing your descent as you slide off the horse and into his arms.

“Thanks,” you breathe out.

He nods but doesn’t release you. Not until Shimmer whinnies and stamps forward a few steps for a drink.

Joel heads to the stream and starts to take off his flannel, revealing his forearms and biceps, the muscles flexing and tightening as he reaches down to fill his canteen. He takes a long sip, the strong column of his throat shifting with each swallow and you suddenly feel more thirsty than ever before in your life.

After a small lunch and a water refill you’re back on Shimmer, headed to one last spot before returning for the day.

“Those clouds don’t look very good,” you mumble as you glance out west to the darkened sky.

“They don’t,” Joel agrees. “It feels like rain.”

“Do you think we’ll make it back in time?” you ask.

As if on cue, Joel’s radio emits static before Tommy’s voice comes through asking for your location.

You listen to the conversation, your stomach sinking when Tommy says the rain has already reached them.

“Think we’re gonna have to find a safe house to wait out the storm,” Joel says as he clicks off the com device.

Thunder rumbles far in the distance and the corner of his mouth lifts into a smirk. “Better get movin’.”

Just as he shoulders past the dilapidated door the rain drops start to fall. He holds a finger to his lips and tucks you behind him, stepping quietly and slowly into the house. He shines his flashlight in the corners of the room, the dark clouds now blotting out most of the days earlier sunshine and casting shadows all around you.

You wait, your grip on his shirt tight as you follow in step. When he’s satisfied the house is clear he clicks off the flashlight and his shoulders relax.

“Looks ok,” he says.

When you don’t release his shirt he looks down at where your hand is still fisted in the soft material. You track his gaze and release it quickly.

“Scared?” he teases.

You shake your head and let out the breath you were holding in.

An hour later you’re seated on the dusty floor, laughing as Joel tries to land the broken pieces of a vase into another that’s still intact.

“Your aim stinks,” you laugh.

“I’d like to see you do better,” he says.

You stand and hold your hand out for some of the pieces, staring down at him and waiting for him to move over so you can sit in the right spot. He shoves to the side but only enough for you to sit with yourself plastered to his side. Something sparkles in his eyes and is lips curl just a millimeter before he motions with a tilt of his head for you to take your best throw.

With a wry smile you line up your throw and launch it, missing the opening of the vase by half a foot. His body shakes next to you, and you elbow him in the side.

“Oof,” he mumbles before going quiet.

You try again but fail to get it inside the vase.

“I have to stand up!” you say determinedly.

“Don’t think that’s gonna do any good,” he jokes, and you give him a solid side eyed glare.

After your fourth missed throw, instead of his laughter, which you were prepared for, his hand meets the small of your back, and you sharply inhale at how warm and massive his palm is over the thin fabric of your tee shirt. He had to have felt it, the way you jolted at the contact, but he holds you steady and sure as he positions your body.

“Try now,” he says, his voice low.

He fixes the angle of your elbow then with a reluctance you can sense he moves away. You take the shot and get it inside the vase without even hitting the edge.

“YES!” you cheer far too loudly, the sound echoing around the emptiness of the house.

Both you and Joel go still, his eyes darting around as he takes a step closer to you. A sound outside the house startles you, your gasp catching in your throat when you see a shadow move outside the window. Joel wraps his arm around your waist and pulls you behind him, pressing you into the wall as he walks toward the kitchen. He reaches behind his back, his hand brushing along your stomach in the process, and pulls out his knife.

You wait, barely breathing as whatever is outside continues to pass the window. After several heart stopping moments, it turns and you realize it’s just a deer grazing outside the house, it’s large ears turned upward and out as if to listen itself.

“Shit,” you sigh, relaxing against Joel.

When he turns around to face you his body is merely an inch from yours, his eyes searching your face when he asks, “you ok?”

“Yeah,” you tell him, swaying closer. “I’m sorry.”

“No,” he whispers. “It’s fine. You have nothing to be sorry for.”

You give him the best smile you can and wait for him to step back but he doesn’t, instead, leaning forward and crowding you against the wall. His eyes drop to your mouth, lingering before he drags them back up and his lips part. You let out a shuddering breath, your eyelashes fluttering along your cheeks and your breath hitching when you feel his fingertips graze your neck.

The shrill sound of static and Tommy’s garbled voice breaks you out of the moment and you both move away with an intake of air. Joel let’s out a sigh and grabs the walkie talkie.

“Looks like we’re goin’ to be spendin’ the night,” Joel says as he watches you closely.

You can’t sleep. Despite the coolness of the rain filled night and the coziness of your sleeping bag, your body is heated, and your mind is racing. You decide to explore the house. Glancing at Joel’s sleeping bag it appears he’s still in it but it’s hard to tell under the blanket of darkness. Quietly, you creep free of the cocoon of fabric and tip toe toward the back of the house. Any other sounds of the night are muted by the consistent downpour of rain and the worn wooden floors are cool under your bare feet.

“Ah, and here I was thinkin’ I was alone.”

You jump at the deep voice, blinking repeatedly in the darkness as your eyes adjust. Slowly, a figure comes into view, a dark shadow that the closer it gets the more you recognize as Joel, broad shouldered, arms crossed over his chest and a small smile pulling at his lips.

“Couldn’t sleep?” he asks.

“Not really,” you answer as you lean back against the kitchen counter.

You can’t see his eyes clearly in the dark, but you can feel them like warm rays of sunshine on your skin. You rub your hands over your bare arms, your tank top suddenly feeling paper thin, while minutes ago you felt too hot in your sleeping bag. Taking his time, but with purposeful steps, he moves closer to you, resting along the counter next to you. Your fingers curl around the edge of the grimy Formica, as if the action will keep you from reaching out for him.

“Why are you up?” you ask.

His face turns toward yours. “Wanted to make sure I could keep watch…keep you safe.”

You inhale deeply and his eyes fall to where you chest expands. “I like that you want to keep me safe.”

His nostrils flare, eyes searching your face, lips parted like he wants to speak but something holds him back. You watch the bob of his throat with his heavy swallow, the hollow area where his neck meets his collarbone as it ebbs and every muscle in your body tightens, your legs squeezing together.

He’s close enough now that even through the shadowed veil of night you can see the intensity of his gaze and feel his warm breath caress your cheek.

“I like to protect what’s mine,” he husks, his nose barely skimming yours.

At your gasp of air, his lips tilt upward, and warm fingertips brush the outside of your thigh, just above your knee. You feel the goosebumps erupt in a wave over your skin and he leans closer, his hips pressing into you, the large bulge between his legs brushing your stomach and outlining every substantial inch of him.

He has to know you feel it, has to know you’re just as affected, but just as suddenly as he’s right there, he steps back, turning away as your breath rushes back with a kick.

“Get some sleep darlin.’ We have an early start tomorrow.”

The next morning, the rain clings to the grass in sparkling dew drops and the air smells of damp earth. Shimmer trots away from the small town, away from what almost happened last night, and back toward reality. You try not to lean into Joel, but the uneven ground bobs you up and down, back, and forth, and constantly into his body. His tee shirt is thin enough that you feel the flex and shift of his back muscles beneath it and you can smell his skin, lightly dampened with sweat from the rising sun.

You reach Jackson without incident and part ways with Joel, quiet and reserved. Fortunately, you’re able to keep busy the next few days, catching up on various chores you missed and some much-needed sleep.

At least, until the middle of the week when Ellie drags you over to her house to show you the new guitar Joel gifted her. When you walk inside there’s no sign of Joel and you deflate with disappointment, the realization that you’ve missed him hitting harder than any time before.

Ellie excitedly chatters over the instrument as she shows you everything, even strumming some chords Joel’s started to teach her. You can’t help but feel her happiness, especially knowing how hard Joel has worked to fix the guitar.

“Maybe you’ll teach me after you learn more,” you tell Ellie with a smile.

Before she can answer you hear Joel’s gruff voice. “I’ll teach you to play.”

He emerges from his bedroom, running a hand along his bearded jaw while the muscles tick as he looks you over.

“Yeah?” you ask with a raised brow, trying to appear nonchalant.

“I’d love to,” he says, his words soft, subtle.

Ellie’s eyes swing back and forth between the two of you, her brow furrowed. “I’m just gonna go show this to Dina,” she squeaks. “See you guys later.”

She rushes off with the guitar and a slam of the door.

You cross your arms over your chest and drop your gaze. He’s across the room before you can register the movement, his thick fingers pressed under your chin to lift your eyes to his.

“Joel…”

“Don’t say my name like that, darlin’,” he warns, his eyes flicking to where you’ve pinned your bottom lip with your teeth. “Not unless you want…”

“Want what?” you interrupt.

He steps closer, his hand reaching out for your cheek and brushing along your lip to pull it free of your teeth. The pad of his thumb rubs the spot, slowly, teasingly, until your lips part with a gasp. His hand sweeps back, gripping the nape of your neck lightly. He pulls you in, and your eyelashes flutter along your cheeks.

The sound of boisterous laughter fills the air, and you hear the turn of the doorknob before Ellie and Dina bound in, breathless and smiling.

“Oh shit,” Ellie says, her smile falling before rising again now laced with mischief.

“I thought you said they were fighting?” Dina asks, her smile matching Ellie’s.

“They were,” Ellie says through the side of her mouth.

Joel’s teeth grind and Ellie’s smile widens. “I’m just gonna grab the tuner then we’ll be out of your hair.”

She rushes over to the table and rips the tuner off, sprinting back toward Dina and pushing her out the door.

For a long moment, Joel watches you, a million indecipherable emotions surging in his eyes. You watch the muscles in his jaw tighten; watch the way he slides his hands into his pockets as if it’s the only way to keep them from reaching out to touch you. He lets out a long, slow, and steady exhale, and then the door opens again, and Tommy appears.

“Need your help with somethin’,” he says, looking to Joel before his eyes slide to you apologetically.

Joel walks you back to your house, leaving you with a mumbled apology and following Tommy to the town hall. You flop back on your bed, covering your face with a pillow before screaming into it. Then you pull it off and stare up at the ceiling, your legs bouncing against the mattress. Your nerves are buzzing, and you’re entirely too restless and turned on. You lay there for a long time, forcing yourself to calm your breathing, placing your hands on your chest to follow the rhythmic rise and fall.

Just the pressure of your hands and the brush of your fingertips has you inhaling sharply, your thoughts shifting immediately to Joel and how his hands would feel along your bare skin. You flatten your palm to your stomach and let your mind continue to drift.

The way his eyes seem to devour you every time he sees you, like it’s the first and last time he will.

The words he spoke…he protects what’s his.

Every stolen touch and almost kiss…what would his kiss feel like.

Your knees drop open, your hand sliding between your thighs.

You can smell his skin, feel the growl of want rumble through his chest as he pins you to the bed.

A pulse shoots between your legs, and you chase the sensation with your fingers, running them through your wet folds before circling your clit. You moan and arch into the touch, imagining every touch, every whisper of his lips, until your fingers circle faster and your hips roll.

The faster your fingers move, the more your thoughts run wild, and you twist in the sheets, chasing the feeling as you slip a finger inside you.

Just then, a hard knock pounds the door. Your eyes shoot open, and you nearly kill yourself trying to get off the bed and to the door. Thankfully, your bedroom is in the far back of the house, so Joel is only in the living room when you walk out.

His brown eyes look darker than usual, and he smirks, letting his gaze sweep over you from head to toe. Your body hums.

“What were you doin’ darlin’?” he asks. “I thought I heard some…noises.”

“I feel asleep!” you say quickly. “And I think I was having a dream.”

He raises a brow and pops his knee out. “Hmm.”

“Is everything ok?” you ask, needing to change the subject.

“Yeah, just fine,” he says, “but we need to give our patrol report to the council.”

Then he turns and walks back to the door, holding it open for you.

After the meeting, Ellie’s back and requesting more guitar lessons so you leave them to it, not missing the way Joel’s gaze lingers on you until you disappear from view. It’s not until you’re out for an evening walk that you see him again, sitting quietly on the porch with his guitar over his lap.

He motions for you to come over and you do so without question, leaning against the porch railing.

“Where’s Ellie?” you ask.

“Doin’ something with Dina,” he says with a relaxed wave of his hand. “She had enough of me and my old man music.”

You cover your mouth to stifle your laughter and watch his face light up.

“What were you playing just now?”

“Some song from the 1980s…”

“I like it.”

He stands, taking the guitar with him.

“Here.”

You look from him to the guitar then take it in your hands, arranging it in front of you as best you know how.

“Like this,” he gently instructs, fixing first your hand positioning then your fingers. You try to focus on what he’s saying but instead can’t seem to stop the way your breath hitches at his touch.

His warm palm slides up your arm and he pulls you closer, pressing your back to his chest so he can show you how to play a chord. You can feel him hard against your lower back and you lose all trace of coherency.

“I know what you were doin’ earlier,” he whispers into your neck. “Heard you call my name.”

You whimper with need at this words and when he presses a soft kiss under your ear you have to lean all your weight into him to hold you steady.

“How long are we going to pretend?” he murmurs, his lips moving higher and skimming the shell of your ear.

You tremble in his hold. “Pretend what?”

“Pretend like you’re not already mine.”

Your next breath shudders out of you, and he takes the guitar from your hands and rests it to the side, then without warning spins you in his arms so you’re trapped between him and one of the posts of the porch.

“Yours…” you breathe out, confirming it.

He pulls you flush against him, lining up every part of your bodies in a way so possessive you feel your knees weaken.

His large palm runs between your breasts, up your collarbone, until his fingers wrap around your neck, squeezing just a pinch, and then releasing it to trail his fingers higher. His thumb sweeps over your bottom lip, and you open your mouth, tasting the salt of his skin. Your eyes connect with his, and his nose flares, his cock flexing against where your bodies are pressed together.

He groans, his next breath nothing but a hiss, his nose dragging along your neck with a deep inhale. His long fingers splay along your cheek, and he tilts your head up with the press of his thumb under your chin before his lips brush yours lightly.

The contact is too much and without wasting another second his lips are on yours, completely consuming. He presses you harder against the post of the porch , meeting your hips with his own. He grips your wrists in his hands, guiding them up over your head until they’re pinned along the wood of the post and he kisses you harder, biting your lower lip before soothing it with his tongue.

“Is this what you thought about as you were touchin’ yourself baby?”

He kisses you again, swallowing your moaned confirmation. He takes over where he has your wrists pinned with one hand, letting the other trail down your arm, your neck and down to your breast where he caresses the soft flesh.

His hands, one so powerfully restraining you, while the other dips lower, feather light, into the waistband of your pants, threaten to ruin you. You gasp and arch into the touch and his knee wedges between your legs to spread them open.

“I need to touch you,” he murmurs as he slips his warm finger beneath your panties, running a line through your wet desire as your entire body convulses with the contact.

You chase his lips, unable to do much more than lean into him, reaching with your mouth where he meets you with another all-consuming kiss. A cry slips past your lips when his finger brushes your clit, sliding deeper until he’s teasing your entrance.

“You’re so fuckin’ wet baby,” he hisses, slicking his finger before teasing your clit.

“Please Joel,” you practically beg.

“You’ve been drivin’ me crazy since the first time I saw you,” he whispers, his touch still light, still teasing, but his words full of desperation.

He rests his forehead against yours, his eyes locked onto your face as he slides one thick finger inside you. Your lips part and your eyes start to flutter closed.

“Open them,” he growls. “Look at me.”

You do as he says, his nose skimming yours as he starts to work his finger in and out. Your breathing accelerates and your hips move with his hand and when he presses his thumb to your clit you let out a cry of his name. He silences you with a kiss, only pulling away when he feels you tighten around his finger. You fall apart and he releases your wrists, your body sagging into his arms as he drags out your pleasure with slow strokes and soft praises.

You don’t know how you make it into the house, can’t remember him opening the door and pulling you inside. All you know is the feel of your back against his mattress and his fingertips seeking, roaming, gripping, and tugging. He meets every desperate touch of yours with one even more anguished of his own. Your hands tangle in his hair, his big hands covering your breasts before his mouth does. You gasp at the sensation and writhe beneath him.

He sits up only to tuck his thumbs at your hips, slowly dragging the fabric of your panties down your legs.

“You’re a masterpiece,” he murmurs before his eyes meet yours and he moves again, settling between your spread legs.

You rock your hips, whining when you feel the roughness of his jeans. He quickly unzips them and kicks them off, barely giving you a chance to admire him before he presses his palm to your inner thigh and opens you wider for him. You feel the press of him between your legs, hard, warm and like silk.

His hand on your thigh pushes harder and he slides down your body, your whimper at the loss of him quickly softened when his nose grazes your clit and his tongue dips inside you.

“Oh god,” you cry, your body shaking.

He answers by holding you even more steady, open, and wide as he buries his face between your thighs and licks and sucks your clit in a rhythm that drives you wild. Your hands fall to his hair, gripping hard the closer he brings you to your release. Your orgasm rushes through you, your hips rocking into his face and your fingers tangled in his hair.

You’ve barely caught your breath when he slides back up your body, kissing and nipping as he goes to find your lips, your taste on his tongue.

“You taste even sweeter than I imagined,” he whispers, his hips moving until you feel the tip of his cock right where you need him.

With a breathy exhale you press into him, closing your eyes and digging your nails into his broad shoulders.

“Keep those eyes on me,” he commands. “Understand?”

You open them with a nod, wetting your lips and rolling your hips.

He grins at your compliance, kissing you hard before his gruff voice rumbles against your lips. “Good girl.”

You would respond but he gives you a look, one filled with so much emotion it steals your breath, then he fills you. A shocked moan leaves your mouth, and his eyes stay locked on yours as he withdraws and slowly pushes inside again, stretching you open, his body trembling.

“Fuck baby,” he breathes, looking down to watch himself disappearing inch by inch.

His hand smooths along the curve of your waist, over your hip and to your thigh, squeezing before he hikes it higher, opening you up so he can push deeper. It’s too good, he feels too perfect, and you feel your next release building quickly. You slide your fingers down his arms, feeling the muscles in his biceps tight with restraint as he holds himself above you and sets a bruising pace. Your whispered plea for more is all it takes to snap his control, and the rush of sensations hits you all at once.

Your body shakes and you tighten around him, fueling his own release. He growls, dropping his head to your neck as a shuddering groan rips through him and you feel him pulse inside you.

For long moments, he just holds you, his damp forehead pressed against your skin, breathing labored and his body wrapping you in a warmth that feels like home.

“Fuck,” he sighs, smiling softly when his eyes find yours again. “You,” he whispers, kissing your lips. “Are,” another kiss. “Magnificent.”

He peppers your face with soft kisses. “Are you ok?”

“Yes,” you smile, “never been better.”

He sweeps his thumb along your cheekbone then cradles your face in his hand. “Good. Because I’m goin’ to do whatever I can to keep that smile on your face.”

[ao3cassandraic]

SO OKAY I was right about some parts of this and wrong about some other parts. About par for the course for me.

SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS for the first two episodes of Murderbot. DID I MENTION THERE ARE SPOILERS. BECAUSE THERE ARE. SPOILERS.

Yeeeeeeeeeeep, the Captain totally slept with that bot. And I called it on the possibility of that bot (which I guess I will call NavUnit, that being the nearest available possibility for a name) not being a ComfortUnit. Very curious to see where this goes.

(Still adore Sanctuary Moon for being a technicolor riff on Star Trek. Like, there are some shots that could have BEEN overcolorizations of the first Original Series movie or the ST:Voyager opening credits. They parody because they love, and I'm here for it! And now that I have more than three seconds of it to look at, I definitely think they are taking a shot at the shittastic coloring and rendering from AI image generators. Give 'em hell, design and VFX folks!)

I was also right that Gurathin was trying to get Murderbot to act human, but I was utterly and completely wrong about why. @sainamoonshine got it right: Gurathin doesn't trust Murderbot as far as he could throw it, and in his head, acting what he thinks of as "humanlike" -- with empathy -- is the main symptom of Murderbot's wrongness. So he pokes at empathy and humanness repeatedly.

Which is, like, hilarious on any number of levels! It's absolutely deadly meta! (Those of y'all who know me from Good Omens fandom know that meta is, like, totally my thing.)

But the absolute pinnacle of hilarity in that scene for me is that Gurathin is the. absolute. worst. person. to. test. this. Because he's damn near as socially awkward as Murderbot itself! He sticks out like a sore thumb among the touchy-feely PresAux folks. That whole scene with Murderbot is a massive awkward-off!

(Murderbot wins the conversation, mostly because Gurathin was wrong to block Murderbot going with Mensah and they both damn well know it by then. Which, again, Murderbot winning any conversation with a human is meta as hell. Also metal. You go, MB.)

In another way, though, Gurathin's the best person to test Murderbot's reactions, because he and Murderbot are so very, very alike -- even beyond them both being cyborgs. (Which I like! It makes the line between human and not-human, so assiduously enforced by the corpos, even more clearly bullshit.) Murderbot even lampshades the similarities, all that competitiveness over processing speed.

Does Gurathin ever touch another PresAuxer except when forced to by Ratthi and (implicitly) Mensah in the search for consensus? (I'll rewatch, but I think the answer is "no." He doesn't even hold Bharadwaj's hand in medbay, best I can tell.) Did you see Gurathin trying to dance and failing spectacularly? Whatever he's got going with Mensah (though it seems to be "at" Mensah rather than with her), he both won't admit to it and is incredibly awkward when he shows it. He looks damn near as squicked by the ComfortUnit/sex turn in the conversation with Murderbot as Murderbot does. The dude cannot even turn a damn chair around in a non-awkward fashion.

As someone with more than her fair share of Socially Awkward, I was absolutely cackling. They're utter disasters, both of them. (Don't worry about me, I do okay. Social behaviors are learnable for me, given motivation and time. But at fifty-fucking-two years old I still have to remind myself about conversational turn-taking.)

The thematic point here is that depeopleizing arbitrary types of people -- again, the line between Gurathin and Murderbot is razor-thin if it's there at all -- takes a whole lot of work, alike as we all are. The PresAux folks have it easier, in a way, because except for Gurathin they're not trying to do it.

I guess I grudgingly forgive David Dastmalchian for misgendering Murderbot in an interview. Still wish he hadn't done that (DUDE, there's enough misgendering going around already, not to mention the number of reviewers calling MB a robot, MB is not a robot dammit), but he's doing a great job in the actual show so far.

The depeopleization of *Units in the Murderbot trailer

Just some things that caught my eye as I watched.

The amount of literal and metaphorical dehumanization -- ugh, bad word; Murderbot isn't and doesn't want to be human, so let's go with "depeopleization" -- of bots in a short li'l trailer is... whew. It's a whole damn thing. If you didn't feel as uncomfortable as the Preservation crew did watching the corpos market their SecUnits not with spec sheets (much less résumés) but by putting the most expensive model on blatantly posed display... I'm not sure I know you, because wow, that's absolutely hideous. The books aren't subtle about Murderbot's story being a sci-fied enslavement narrative, but absolutely zero punches pulled in that scene.

(It reconciles me, a tiny bit, to Murderbot being acted by a white person. I still don't love that! But I can acknowledge there's some symbolic utility to it. Thing is, there would be symbolic utility the other way too; it'd just be different.)

While Murderbot itself waves off the corpos' scorn of it as an older and less-capable (by their lights) model, I can't. That, too, is a blatant denial of inherent worth and individuality. (Also I have every confidence that Murderbot could give that new model a fair fight. Experience counts for something, not that the corpos care. So they're being ageist, too! If Martha Wells was using that moment to take a shot at the publishers that wrote her off, more power to her.)

Obviously SecUnit armor is also designed to look deliberately not-human, even perhaps with an ableist touch. Murderbot's visor makes it look as though it has only one eye, and what it wears as it's guarding the door of the crew base is tilted toward what reads to me as a cliché TV robot. The newer SecUnit is entirely faceless (in a very 2020s-riot-cop sort of way, which was doubtless fully intentional).

I frankly got angry (Watsonianly, not Doylistly; I'm not mad at the trailer or those who made it) at the "it can't hear us!" bit. Personal history as a bullied child. I was walking back to school from a fourth-grade field trip, two of my bullies talking shit about me right behind me. One of them finally noticed I was there, shut up, and nudged or poked or kicked the other, who just said disdainfully and in full consciousness of the lie, "she can't hear us." Yeah, so that completely depeopleized bit in the trailer -- again, possibly with a touch of ableism to it -- was perfectly executed, and that's all I'm going to say about that.

And then we get to the Sanctuary Moon clip, in which the soap-opera conflict revolves around the Captain possibly having slept with "that bot," also a completely depeopleizing (though perfectly soapy, doubtless paralleling "that bitch") phraseology. (For what it's worth, I fully believe the Captain slept with that bot. John Cho's face, y'all!)

What's fascinating about that clip is that the crew's reactions of disgust and dismay are ambiguous. Possibly sleeping with a bot is viewed as inherently gross. Possibly it's something about that specific bot. Possibly it's something to do with how humans gender bots in soap operas (which we know nothing about even from the books, because Murderbot doesn't give a crap about gender or sexuality). Given that Sanctuary Moon is a soap opera, quite possibly there's history specific to the Captain, the bot, or both. We don't know! But what's clever about that is that it forces us to allow the possibility that once again it's bot depeopleization.

Cinnamon-roll Ratthi (perfectly cast) gets himself in a perfectly Ratthiesque muddle trying to work out how to be respectful to Murderbot. Using a person's self-chosen monicker is indeed respectful in almost all circumstances! But as Murderbot itself says about its name, "That's private." So Ratthi's attempt falls a bit short, but I'll give him some love for trying.

If you haven't seen it yet, do find the non-trailer clip going 'round of Gurathin opening a conversation with Murderbot. (If you check the #murderbot tag, you should find it.) This reads to me as Gurathin, perhaps prompted by Ratthi's behavior (the chronology here isn't clear), deliberately trying to assert to Murderbot that it is, in fact, a person. Gurathin does this by requesting that Murderbot do what people routinely do when they talk to one another: bare their faces.

Tactless? Yeah, arguably, though again it's not clear how much Gurathin knows about Murderbot's shyness at that point. But I get what he -- and the show -- are driving for.

[selineram3421]

Other Worldly

Part 7

Part 6

Alastor X Shy Reader

Warnings ⚠

⚠ implied depression episode? (mostly laying down and not moving), food mention-seaweed/meat pie, mention of intestines, panic attack. ⚠

Looking up, you saw the slight shimmers of light streaming into the water.

It's as beautiful as you remember.

You stayed underwater for the day. Alastor had let you rest your voice, saying he had something to do this morning and you got some seaweed snacks to have for when you felt like eating something quick.

It was a nice change of scenery, usually you would just lie in bed all day and feel like crap. Meanwhile, here you could appreciate some nature to take your mind off of your thoughts for a moment. A moment is all you needed to lay things out and plan for what happens next.

Then you were suddenly out of the water and in familiar arms.

"Ah!", you squeaked and grabbed onto the deer demon, fin smacking him slightly as you tried to balance yourself in his hold.

"Good news my dear! We are going out to pick something up. Some fresh air would do you some good.", Alastor smiled down at you.

"I-", you started but were quickly shushed.

"My friend in Cannibal Town has been eager to meet you! She's set up an arrangement of items for you to choose from and has prepared snacks. She'd also like to ask you something. I believe you'll enjoy yourself!"

After agreeing, you ended up standing in front of Rosie's Emporium a bit later.

"Let us enter, we can't keep her waiting!", he grinned and opened the door before guiding you in.

Something in your gut told you that it was wrong, something was wrong, but you weren't sure what it was.

.

Alastor brought them to Rosie's, walking them through the crowd of demons before entering the back room where his friend had the best things set up.

"Rosie! We are here!"

"Where are your manners? Honestly Alastor, I swear, I have to remind you every time to knock!", Rosie said from somewhere farther away. "Take a seat on the couch, I'll be there in a second."

He sat his little mer down on the couch and placed himself next to them.

"I've told Rosie about how beautifully you sing, she's been quite interested to hear you but I wanted you to speak for yourself on this matter.", he smile widened. "It's up to you my dear."

But they'll say no~

He was positive that his siren would refuse, and Rosie would have no choice but to back off. He would have them all to himself.

All for me.

"Apologies for the wait.", Rosie walked out from the hallway in the back. "I was making sure the snacks were delicious.", she smiled. "Now, let us get on with business.", the Cannibal Overlord sat down on the couch from across the two. "I'm Rosie, a friend of Alastor's and I'd like to hire you for a month or so to sing."

He glanced at the mer demon and found them shocked, their fingers starting to fidget, most likely due to nerves.

"Could you perhaps give them some more information Rosie? I'm sure they'd love to know what the occasion is.", he spoke up.

"Oh, you're absolutely right.", the woman said. "Let me bring out the snacks first. I'm sure we can have a bite or two to enjoy while talking."

She left the two alone for a moment and Alastor turned to check on his mer, finding them looking down at their hands on their lap.

"What's wrong dear?", he asked.

"I don't think I could do this. Sing in front of a crowd? I barely have the courage to sing in front of you, how could I-", they began.

"Now, now.", he stopped them from rambling. "This is why I brought you here. So you could answer for yourself."

They were quiet for a moment before asking where the bathroom was.

He told them and watched as they left the room.

Rosie came in with a tray not a minute later and set it down. "Where have they gone?", she asked.

"Powder room.", he responded.

"Oh, so now we can talk.", she grinned and sat on the couch. "Tell me, what else has happened so far? Anything interesting?"

"They have seemed to take a liking for my shadow. So I'll use that to get closer to them.", he said and picked up a small meat pie. "I'm just waiting for the perfect opportunity."

"But what if they find out?", she asks. "I would be a little more careful if I were you. Especially since the deal you made wasn't for their soul."

"Oh please.", Alastor rolled his eyes. "It's only a matter of time before I get it.", then he took a bite of the pie, chewing and swallowing before speaking again. "I already have half of their power. Such a useful thing it is! Why, I made a pitiful sinner eat their own intestines!"

.

You didn't know how to react.

Why is he telling her this? You thought, confused. I don't understand.

You didn't take long in the bathroom and we're now hiding by the doorway after hearing Rosie said something about a soul.

"I already have half of their power. Such a useful thing it is! Why, I made a pitiful sinner eat their own intestines!"

There was an odd sensation in your chest.

It felt like water was filling your lungs, then your throat felt like it was being clogged up and you couldn't speak. It burned, what you wanted to say stayed stuck in your throat and you started to tear up.

I- I can't speak. You tried to breathe but you ended up taking too short of breaths. Why!? I need to- Another breath too short. I need to leave. A gasp. I need to go.

Turning to leave, you whimpered as the pain grew, clutching your neck with one hand as you tried to rush out of the emporium. Of course, you were loud enough for the two demons in the other room to hear.

It felt like thorns prickling in your neck, or barbed wire coiling around on the inside. Something was wrong, the pain being too much, tears now running down your face.

Something broke as you bumped into the wall, causing you to stagger a bit.

You didn't notice when he had approached you.

All you knew was that you were leaning against the wall and then the next thing was that Alastor turned you to face him, his eyebrows furrowed as he looked at you with a strained smile.

He held your wrist, his lips moving hesitantly, his voice coming through your ears in bits and pieces as he moved your hand from your neck.

"-try to take slower breaths-", he said, using his thumb to brush some tears off of your face. "-an you hear me?-"

It hurts. You kept trying to breathe but instead of air, your lungs were burning. It hurts! You closed your eyes in pain.

"Darling, plea-"

Then something in you snapped.

"LET ME GO!"

It felt like blades tearing into your vocals, slicing away as you shouted at the Radio Demon, who instantly followed your command.

Blinking your eyes open, you noticed his eyes were glazed over.

A second passed before you understood. The deal was broken completely and the other half of your powers returned to you.

Without a second thought, you ran out of the building and away from him.

You kept going until your feet ached, until you were stumbling to get back to the hotel and lock yourself somewhere no one would find you.

Then you bumped into someone.

Both of you fell to the ground.

"I'm-", you sat up but quickly stopped, placing a hand to your neck when remembering that you couldn't speak all that freely anymore.

"Ow. The fuck- Watch where you're going!" , a feminine voice said. "What-", then she stopped.

You felt chills as the woman said your name.

Looking up, you saw a pink jellyfish type demon who was staring at you with wide eyes.

"I missed you.", she smiled.

*chanting* Mermay, mermay, mermay, mermay, mermay!

~Seline, the person.

Part 8

Taglist@

@preciousbabypeter @poppingaround @bishiglomper @darifes @random-3455 @mspurpl3 @chirimeimei @sharkthong @enjisthings @aspiring-bookworm @cherry-cola-100 @fairyv-ice @phoephan-123 @briethekitsune @fuzzyturtlepaws @redrose360 @anngray1369 @fries11 @viviuxd @loserrrluvvverrr @+? @+more in the comments+

ML I Alastor🎙️ | OW🦀

[apricustar]

what is your take on buck announcing he was going to transfer in 8.18? i didnt take him as a runner especially after that conversation he had with maddie about how she’s the runner out of the two of them

hi nonnie! well, honestly, i think that was one of the only in-character things that happened in last night's episode. which, seems to be an unpopular opinion: i've only seen people call it abrupt and ooc—but i don't think its either. i think it's the final step in a process of emotional dislocation that's been happening all season.

and, the thing is, this is not the first time buck has said he's going to put in for transfer!

back in season 5, after chimney left to find maddie, buck did the same thing. he gave this calm, rehearsed little speech about how much he has loved being part of the 118–but then said he was leaving for 'the good of everyone.' and it quickly unraveled into what it was really about: guilt—that aching feeling of being the one responsible for ruining things without meaning to. he thought he was the reason chimney left, the reason everything at the station suddenly felt fractured. he curled himself around the silence like it was punishment, like proof that everyone else was thinking what he felt was true: that he was the problem, that everything was his fault.

and that is buck to a T! he’s hyper-aware of emotional shifts—the tiniest change in tone, silence that stretches too long, the moment someone looks away instead of reaching back. that’s how he navigates the world. when it’s his fault, it’s familiar. it gives him something to fix—something to hold onto—when everything else feels out of his control.

buck isn’t a runner in the way maddie is, but when fixing doesn’t work—he starts to disappear instead. not all at once. not dramatically. just in small, tentative steps backward. and then bigger ones. a transfer request: a final act of self-removal dressed up as a solution. a way to say, if i’m the reason this hurts, maybe stepping back completely will help.

at the end of the day, it's not about wanting to go. it’s about not knowing if he deserves to stay. it’s about trying to manage the hurt of disconnection by changing what variables around him he can—his job, his space, his role—because naming what’s really hurting feels impossible.

and now, in 8x18, it happens again. not in anger. not as a threat. just that same quiet resignation. that same question beneath the surface: if the people i love don’t need me—if i’ve failed them, again—then what am i still doing here?

he tries to holds onto bobby's words. tries to be what the team needs. he prods with grief assessment questions. he follows maddie's asks, helps her corral chimney. he reassures eddie. continues picking up pieces, again and again, like if he can just keep going, things will eventually come back together.

but despite his best attempts, they don't. nothing is getting better. his efforts aren’t getting anywhere. and buck is a doer—he always has been. he believes in action, in momentum, in helping. but now the doing hasn’t done anything. he’s thrown himself into every task, every gesture, every fix he can think of, and still, everyone is spinning further and further apart.

while speaking to bobby in the confessional, he tells him that he was wrong—that the team doesn’t need him. and buck, who has always measured his value by what he can give, starts to believe he has nothing left. that maybe the only thing he has left to offer is his absence.

so he says he’s transferring—not because he wants to, not even really because he means it. but because he needs to say something. do something. because when you’re buck, and all your doing has failed, stepping away starts to feel like the only thing left.

transferring isn't necessarily about escape. it's more about reaching a limit. it's about not knowing how else to say things like do i still matter? will anyone ask me to stay? will things ever feel the way they did—and if they do, does that mean we’ve moved on? forgotten?

i don't think buck runs from the people he loves. he runs from the idea that he’s already been left. he runs from the silence. from the hollowness. from the version of himself that feels like a burden, like a liability, like the reason things fall apart. he doesn't wait to be asked to leave—he leaves so no one has to ask in the first place. so he doesn't have to deal with the moment where someone confirms what he already fears—that he's too much, or not enough, or the problem.

he removes himself before anyone else gets the chance to. because if it's his decision, at least he has some control. at least the leaving can feel like something he did for them, rather than something done to him.

[ladykakata]

More Gallavich Nonsense - Mental Health Addition

There was a point I made in a response to a post about the treatment of Ian's mental health deterioration and how Mickey seemed to be the only partner of Ian's who took it seriously, and my theory was that it was because Mickey knew Ian before his mental health decline, and the stark change the disorder brought in his personality, that therefore he was the one to take it the most seriously and was the most disturbed by it.

In part of my response, I talked about how the family almost dealt with it in the same way as Monica. On the one hand, it's a positive, in that they know what most of the signs and symptoms will be (Fiona listed them in a particular scene, I remember, with a sigh in her voice) and what some of Ian's patterns of behaviour might be. This was handy for Mickey, who had seemingly had zero experience with mental health on this scale (I'm not going to say none; look at his own family, and that man has PTSD himself at the very least) .

But, in a way, I feel that the Gallagher approach was not entirely helpful to Ian. What made this clear to be was a clearly exhausted and low Ian pointing out "I'm not Monica". And he's right; he might be her son, he might have the same kind of disorder she does, but he is his own person. Mental health manifests in different people in different ways ... and I think this is one of the deepest issues for Ian.

Ian is the middle child of the family. He's the odd one out in that he is the only child - as far as we know - that was not birthed by Monica and fathered by Frank. His biological father is Clayton, and he was disturbed to learn this and desperate to put back the family the way it was before, despite Lip thinking it was Ian's ticket to a more comfortable, middle-class life. Ian is the first to show any same-sex attraction, and has been exclusively gay, compared to Debbie who has had relationships with men and women and self-identifies as a lesbian later in the series. He is neither parentified like Fiona and Lip, nor treated as the child of the siblings unlike Carl, Debbie and later Liam. He's in a weird middle spot, where he is parented by Lip and Fiona, but he also has to be the elder brother figure to the younger children, and later is often the one to physically round up Frank and put him in his place.

[Side note: I think 'enforcer' best describes his dynamic when the Gallagher siblings turn on Frank; Lip and Fiona make the decisions, but once Ian shoots up in height, he is the one who carries out most of the physical acts. Fiona lashed out when Monica and Frank were being loud assholes, but it was Ian who snapped and turned the stereo off, something Frank attacked him for before Monica unexpectedly came to Ian's defence. He's got a function, which is not the same as a 'place', at least to me]

There's a particular gifset that really hammered it in that Ian is 'forgettable' in a way in his own family, and that's deeply tragic in many ways. His family acting as though he is simply going to be a younger, male version of Monica is upsetting, both for the fact that he, too, has been a victim of her disorder, but also he is his own person. This is where Mickey really shines and is, at heart, the best possible partner for Ian.

Mickey has known Ian for a very long time. He has witnessed Ian's evolution over time, from being a timid and reserved teenager, to someone with the force and conviction to stand up to him ("I want the gun back, Mickey") and not be intimidated by Mickey's often violent way of speaking, while still retaining the focused, good-natured side inherent to him. Seeing Ian change to a careless, hedonistic stripper was startling, but the further Ian descends into a mental health spiral, the more alarmed Mickey becomes at his unhinged behaviour; the sheer amount of suitcases Ian steals, his manic episodes following periods of deep, dark depression, he cannot keep up with Ian's moods and normally he is the short-tempered and emotionally volatile one out of the pair of them. He is visibly frightened when Ian returns from another bender, loaded with money and casually mentioning doing a bare-back porno shoot, something Mickey clearly thought was insane and exceptionally out of character for Ian. It's notable in that scene that Mickey's rejection of Ian is the only thing that seems to piece through Ian's blasé attitude about the whole thing. In fact, Mickey's abrupt (to him) lack of support for his behaviour causes him to go on another spiral, one he is later deeply ashamed about.

It's possible Ian didn't expect Mickey to be supportive; after all, his own family were exasperated on having to deal with 'another Monica' and Frank was often too wrapped up in his own nonsense to help Monica. Mickey not only NOT abandoning him, but steadfastly being supportive and even nipping his heels to keep him safe and medicated must have been deeply confusing ... but also so relieving. As much as he grumbled "you a fuckin' nurse now or something?", Mickey still takes pains to give him his medication, give him something to eat, and talk him down after a delusional episode in both a harsh way ("There's nothin' out there! Fuckin' look!") and a reassuring way ("Hey, it's okay, let's go upstairs, get dressed" in a very soft voice). It's very noticeable that Fiona and Debbie just shrug off what happened, as though it was normal, despite their horrified reactions at the time at Ian almost hitting Debbie with the bat. Mickey did NOT treat this like it was normal, he treated it like it was, an uncharacteristic moment driven by mental illness, and is the one to take care of Ian afterwards.

Because Mickey has a much better and more consistent idea about what is 'normal' behaviour from Ian, he can more clearly see when something may be Ian's brain acting out or something else is wrong. Does that mean any other partner wouldn't be suitable? Absolutely not, but I think if a person doesn't get that for Ian in particular, the relationship isn't going anywhere. Ian thrives on structure and consistency, and having a partner who knows when something is wrong is deeply helpful for him. Even with suitable treatment, there's going to be moments when his own brain lashes out, it's just a simple fact of having a brain that doesn't behave in a regular way (speaking from experience here). And he needs someone who will recognise when that's happening and be there for him.

And not treating it in a 'here we go again, should I hide the kitchen knives in case he wants to turn Thanksgiving into a horrifying bloodbath' way.

[violasghost]

While You Were Sleeping-Chenford edition, Season 7x18 episode discussion

It has taken me a few days to digest the season 7 finale of The Rookie. Not because the finale anything jaw dropping or really mind bending, but more because it’s taken me this long to digest how things landed in the finale for our favorite pair.

So, to start things off, I did not read the leaked finale spoilers that came out several days ahead of the finale air date but there was enough hinting and emojis and reactions around the Internet to get the message across that something disappointing was about to happen for Chenford. That said expectations weren’t high, and I hoped at the very least we weren't going to have to watch another grueling break up.

For the record, I have been one of the fans that has been super grateful for all the amazing Chenford content we have gotten this season and in seasons prior. Although I haven’t always been a fan of the plot, especially the choice to break them up, I have been 100% a fan of Melissa and Eric and what they bring to the characters and think that they continue to bring their ‘A’ games each and every episode. We are truly blessed. Which is probably why I keep going back in my mind to, if we are blessed, why does it still feel like something has been off kilter in Chenfordland?

Starting with the role reversal thing. Cause now Lucy’s like 'the guy 'who’s afraid/hesitant to commit and Tim’s 'the girl' who has put it all out on the table? Maybe it makes sense given what they've been through, but sporadically throughout the season they have been portrayed as best friends hanging out frequently, to sometime lovers, then in one episode Lucy referrs to Tim formally as 'Bradford'. Its like pick a lane. Not sure how many writers they have in the room doing Chenford but my head has been spinning this season.

On the bright side, it looks like at least they haven’t said those words ‘Lets break up’ or ‘We need some time apart,' But not sure they are even considered together-enough to be broken up at this point.  It’s like what are they doing exactly? So, we know they aren’t formal boyfriend/girlfriend. I’m guessing they at least see one another as friends-I hope. But friends with benefits? It’s obvious Tim is definitely head over heels in love, but Lucy not so sure about her. She definitely plays her cards close. I do think she genuinely cares for Tim and I thought they were heading in the direction of starting to date, but in the latest episode, it seems like with her comment to Miles, perhaps she’s not even ready to date or have a relationship with Tim for whatever reason. (Probably because she is never allowed to talk about her feelings) It seems to be more of Tim doing the talking (thanks to the writing which never gives Lucy the floor.)

So, I guess going into Season 8, Chenford has to figure out what their priorities are, or I guess I should say, Lucy has to figure out what her priorities are, because Tim already has declared his #1 priority. Their lives no longer revolve around each other by default, since their schedules conflict, so if they don’t make the conscious decision to stay connected, it could be a rocky road. And, if for whatever reason Lucy decides she wants to bail. Tim’s gotta get past that too (Sorry, I don’t want it to happen either, but I’ve been burned before in fandoms so just want to cover all the bases). Unfortunately, based on her conversation with Celina, I don’t think Lucy’s ready to move in with Tim yet, although I truly do empathize with Tim because I think he is trying his best and coming from a place of honesty and love. I think it was also a DICK move on the writers part knowing how long we Chenford fans have waited, over a year, since mid-season 6 for some sort of dialogue about their break-up and how Tim hurt Lucy, and finally in the last minutes of the S7 finale Tim actually addresses some of this in a lucid way, not on truth serum, or lie detector or any other trick, and they don’t even give us the grace of Lucy’s reaction. Truthfully, it’s probably because I’m already on a short fuse due to personal life stuff. (Working at a US University in a research dept is not a fun place to be right now, btw.)

Tim's words were much needed, despite the irony of Lucy never hearing them. And it’s important to note that Lucy also did admit to Celina that she needed to have a more serious conversation with Tim before taking their relationship to the next level. And Lucy did start to text Tim and vice versa with Tim to Lucy. So, in reading between the lines, they may actually want to have a dialogue someday. These very small breadcrumbs however, are not much to keep fans sustained over the long hiatus. The writers seem to want to go out of their way to have Lucy avoid talking about her feelings, and when they do decide to share anything, they talk about their feelings to everyone else-but each other, unless they are not lucid? What’s up with that?

Unfortunately, despite coming in with low expectations due to the spoiler shenanigans, and being grateful for what we've gotten this season, it still somehow felt like we were short changed. I mean they had time for an entire Skip Tracer Randy episode, 2nd episode to last, with lots of time for guest stars and special appearances, and Chenford still only gets 2 minutes in the finale, and no 2-way relationship conversation? Sighs, like many others have mentioned in their reviews, it was just frustrating not to get that and it felt like they chose a copout as opposed to paying the debt that was sorely owed to these two characters.

Will I still root for Chenford after this? Of course. Will I watch with blind shiny optimism knowing that they are going to get their happy ending? Probably not. Am I starting to think the showrunners at this point may think of Chenford more as the shows cash cow couple, which gives them motivation to stretch out the angst/sexy stuff and are maybe thinking less about character growth and more about how to get the next ratings spike? Perhaps.

Oh and I am so effing sick of Monica and Oscar too for that matter. Neither one of them have any business being the big-baddies. Maybe they could pull off being side-kicks to a big baddie, but not solo baddies. They should bring back Elijah-he was an excellent villain. Or, for a bit I thought they were going somewhere with the Zuzu/AI thing and then that guy showing up at Tim’s house. I was even worried something might happen to Tim and the hit man. Or even Glasser was a better villain. All IMO have more potential than Monica or Oscar to do some serious damage. Every time we see Monica and/or Oscar now it feels very cartoonish, like they always seem to be able to escape, and it’s kind of turned into a cheesy beating a dead horse-like plot twist, especially in the season finale. Kinda had to roll my eyes when Monica popped up there at the end as if everyone was surprised. It would be hilarious actually if they played up Monica as the big baddie and then introducing the new villain coming onto the scene by sharp-shooting Monica between the eyes or something. (Sorry to those who don’t like gore) But just think they have over told their stories and they need something fresh and new.

On a side note, if Lucy ever did move in with Tim (not holding my breath until we see a true confession of her feelings), but if she did, Id actually really think Celina and Miles roommate situation would be very entertaining to watch.

Lastly, didn’t Grey serve as Sargeant during the same day shift as Tim when Tim made Sargeant? So, they could potentially have two Sergeants on the day shift at the same time now that Grey has been promoted right? Does one have to be more senior in rank or something if two are serving together? Not sure if anyone took Grey’s place, but just thought there might be an opportunity there for Lucy down the line.

[escapetomerlegaritaville]

I don't think we're talking enough about the fact that they named that baby robert nash han. I was prepared for robert but NASH??? you gave that child his whole entire first and last name i was CACKLING. best part of the episode for me. one of the top 10 funniest things this show has ever done. robert nash han most cursed baby boy in the world <3333

[garbinge]

the porch scene in tlou part 2 means so much to me. it’s arguably one of my favorite scenes of anything. games, movies, tv shows. its honestly a mirror to my own personal shit in a lot of ways but it’s just, a scene that made me feel so much.

and i think the show did an even better job at it. pedro and bella capture joel and ellie so fucking perfectly and even with the changes they’ve made this season and even to this scene, its just still the best scene ever for me. the added ‘i love you’ was everything i needed and more. the fact that ellie has been marinating for years on what is the truth, and then for 9 months knows the truth without ever hearing it from joel was a change i liked. they dont need to verbally communicate everything. they know each other. and this episode showed that in so many ways.

my only complaint is timing.

my favorite thing about the game story is that it makes you feel conflicting things at one time. it’s this concept that two things can be true at once, nothing is black and white, right or wrong, it’s all in this grey area. you can hate abby for what she did to joel and you can love her for saving lev, you can hate her for how she did it and understand her for why she did it. you can want ellie to get revenge while also hope she finds peace. hell, you can love joel for saving ellie while hating that he took this idea of purpose and choice away from ellie.

which brings me to the timing piece, in the game, that porch scene at the end felt…chilling, after everything ellie did, after seeing abby’s journey, and to find out that joel and ellie had that final conversation made everything that happened after joel’s death feel completely understandable and also make me wish ellie didn’t go down this path. and then see her leave, alone.. just left me hollow and fulfilled at the same time. again those conflicting emotions!!!

seeing this scene in the show now kind of takes that away i feel? which is why it’s my only complaint. and its more a half complaint because i think i’d have to see how the whole story unfolds on the show for me to be like hey you shouldn’t have shown us this scene yet!! Watching week to week over the course of multiple seasons might’ve diluted the punch of it, and for that alone i’ll happily take the timing of it now because it still was incredibly moving.

well, hope you enjoyed my jumbled thoughts. all this to say. tlou2 hbo porch scene gutted me and i’ll need 5-7 business days to recover thanks.

[vestaclinicpod]

Audio Drama Sunday - 18th May ✨

I had a stunning trip up to Edinburgh this week and have been maximising my fun in the sun before I start full-time work again next week (booo!)

🧳 Travelling Light @monstrousproductions (46) Pol you’re so cute 😭 we love a supportive work environment, we really do!! I’m glad that The Traveller and Ranaí got to clear the air somewhat. How annoying that the worst person ever (I jest, of course) makes a great point! “It is no small thing, to have people to bring you back to the path when you have strayed.” I love this. It reminds me of some abolitionist literature I’e been reading recently: the idea that people need to be nurtured back into the community instead of being shoved into carceral institutions. And, god, Olí and The Traveller remain so lovely together. I’m sad that they’ll be apart, even if it does seem what’s best for them. 

🍎 @notquitedeadpod (XLVI) I don’t even know how to begin to explain my feelings about this episode! I do love to see historical psych institutions explored with compassion in media!! Sometimes I don’t know how Alfie doesn’t just throttle Neige when he reveals that he’s held the missing puzzle pieces for so long 😅 Maybe Neige would enjoy it too much.

🧋 @hinaypod (57) Oooh more Elder backstory! I’m still trying to be certain in my head who the old and young men are (I feel like Hi Nay is the spiders Georg of old me in audio drama and I mean this as a compliment). I’m excited for part 2!

🔮 @spiritboxradio (1.32) This episode had so much going on that I listened twice to try catch it all. Never fails to crack me up that Anna’s partner whose name we can never catch is actually just a guy called Guy. I find it mind boggling that Oliver is/?was romantically entangled with someone he knew as a baby. . . but I guess that’s just an occupational hazard?? I’m wondering if Sam can still do the thing where he gets whatever he wants. . .  I’m so glad that the siblings are back together! 

💍 @forgedbondspod (17) I’m waiting for whatever Zeus is clearly planning to explode in everyone’s faces. . . hopefully mainly his??

🏘️ @shelterwoodpod (12-16) I finished Shelterwood! The ending honestly took me by surprise, as they’d cleverly used the stuff Nick recorded at the end throughout to make it seem as though he made it back into the real world. I find it verryyy interesting that Shelterwood would let that happen. Clearly, it was deemed that all press is good press! I thought Nhea Durousseau was amazing in particular (but I think she is amazing in everything, so idk if I’m biased!). I hope they get to make a second season! 

Have a lovely week! ☀️

[fallloverfic]

Thoughts on the live-action adaptation of The Murderbot Diaries, Episodes 1: FreeCommerce and 2: Eye Contact:

I enjoyed them well enough. I have criticisms but I'm gonna keep watching. It was funny and entertaining. If you haven't read the books and are at all interested in the series based on the show, I would highly recommend reading them (also the first novella, which the show is based on, is super cheap, and as it's a novella, short). They are much better and funnier. Spoilers below for the books and show

From the get-go: after the first teaser was released, I reread All Systems Red in one sitting, and a good chunk of Artificial Condition. Yes, the story is being massively changed, kind of like they disassembled a puzzle, reassembled the pieces in ways that mostly fit but aren't intended, and then painted over a lot of it so it largely looks right, while the paint is dripping. The core plot is there, particularly at least the major plot beats. Although two cast members have been removed and one added (the latter of which will presumably be in a future episode), and a number of character relationships have been modified as a result, the cast is generally the same. So it's not like "this is entirely different" but rewrites have occurred, which changes a lot, even if, at its heart, it is still very much the same narrative. Anyone who is insisting they haven't changed much or it's basically the story, is not being honest and/or has not reread the books in a while. That's not to say all the changes are bad because they are changes, but the changes exist. A lot of how that works out in the end is subjective.

I like the opening animation. I think it's a cute. I have a soft spot for animated toy openings.

It's a choice but also makes sense to make things more chronological, starting with Murderbot disabling its governor module, while also demonstrating just how much humans abuse it and why it would want to do that. I still think the human hitting it and bouncing off of it is very funny. And I like the armor design. A lot of changes were made to better explain things to an audience that works better for live-action television than books. That's fine as a concept. Again, how it ends up working out for an audience is largely subjective.

The problem with me talking about this show is that I never was able to track who was who among the human cast while reading, except for Mensah lol I care most about Murderbot, ART, and Mensah, so that was kind of it on my list. Humans were just Other. Thus, remembering who is who while learning who is who on the show is EXCITING! But I shall do my best.

I'm not the happiest with describing PreservationAux as "hippies". That's not a term I could find in the books anywhere, so this seems to be a show thing. From a writing angle to a new audience angle, I get why someone might have used it, but it makes no sense for Murderbot to use it (hypothetically it might know what a hippie is, but as a narrative framing reference, it's so far beyond the concept of hippies that it seems weird to use it as a descriptor) and the general narrative step away from treating Murderbot's company as Massive Capitalism Evil Metaphor combined with "Murderbot's new clients are hippies" is not really something I'm into. They might just be slow-building it, and it's not like they weren't upfront with "what's happening with Murderbot is a form of slavery" and also "what's happening with Murderbot is generally horrifying and this is a person they could just murder for parts as desired", but... I don't know. There's a vibe to it I'm not thrilled about, and "hippie" combined with the painting and the singing and the dancing and whatnot is just... hmm. The show seems more focused on how weird PreservationAux is rather than Capitalism Evil, and I'm less trusting of that shift, given, you know, Apple.

The contract scene was very weird in the sense that they were trying to very awkwardly infodump during a contract negotiation and as a result it was perhaps one of the oddest contract negotiations I've seen, even incorporating the science fiction elements. But it's fine for what it is, I suppose.

Volescu has seemingly been removed from the story, at least for this season. In the initial rescue sequence, Arada takes his place. Overse was also for some reason deleted from the story. I would be less averse to shrinking the cast for simplicity if I didn't know, from the trailer, that they're going to add a ComfortUnit somewhere, presumably from DeltFall. As someone who's still having trouble recalling who's who - though writing this and watching the show are helping me stick names to faces - shrinking the cast is again not necessarily an issue. But it's a different story.

I was truly not expecting Clark Gregg looking like he just walked off a production of The Wizard of Oz. I know his bit is in the first trailer, but for some reason, I guess because I was distracted by everything else, I didn't process that it was him lol He was funny for all he was not in there long. The Sanctuary Moon bits were, as expected, great. Also loved John Cho, as expected. Great stuff.

I'm still not a fan of how Murderbot is carrying Bharadwaj wrong. It specifically carries her in a bridal carry in the book to keep her alive (or at least that sounds like that's how it's carrying her), and there's a lot we learn about its competence for doing that. Carrying her like a potato sack so her organs and fluids fall everywhere as she bounces on its shoulder indicates a carelessness that just isn't there. Murderbot can be careless, but not like this.

Ratthi's hot. Just gonna say.

Not into how the team is so excited to sexually harass Murderbot from the get-go. From the trailer I'm guessing this is going to be Ratthi's growth from fuckboi to respectful (well slightly less of a fuckboi I guess), but um... Hmm. Also again, maybe part of the whole "hippie" thing? Yes, PreservationAux is proudly queer and full of polyamorous folks who are happy to fuck, but also... hmm.

I really like Mensah. She's great, as always. I also like Bharadwaj. And poor Pin-Lee, trying to support her wife (probably one of the funnier moments in the show was when she sees Arada jump Ratthi and is like "uh, I have to get involved in this somehow" and it's so relatable when writing orgies). Honestly, the whole cast is really great. We were all worried it wouldn't stay queer, given the state of live-action television these days. Yes, it's very queer. That's lovely.

I'm not the biggest fan of focusing on MurderKen. There sure were a lot of shots of that. I get that it's Skarsgard, they're basically obligated to show his nude body at least once cause Hollywood Sexyman, but... mm.

I think it's funny they made me hate Gurathin for largely different reasons than the books make you hate Gurathin lol Like yes, he's a paranoid asshole and a massive dick to Murderbot. In this... he's also extremely weird and asks incredibly bizarre questions (because he's being used to infodump) and Murderbot is... a bit warier than it probably should be of him based on what it knows. Maybe people think he's just Gurathin being Gurathin but he felt weird in a way entirely different from how he is at least in All Systems Red. It still reads as him. Just... different. Maybe if I really shipped Murderbot and Gurathin I'd have enjoyed it more, I don't know. I'm happy for those shippers, though!

I did enjoy the end bit in Episode 2 where Gurathin talks to Mensah. That was nice. The show demonstrates that he's a dick but he truly does care about his companions.

There were a lot of moments that had me genuinely laughing, like Mensah dropping the f-bomb, Mensah and Bharadawaj's chats (especially the one where they're getting prideful about their scientific specializations, very realistic), Gurathin trying to turn a chair that's not on wheels in a way that's not silly, etc. That kept me in a positive mood that still isn't fully pushed aside by the incredibly bad interrogation.

From a visual perspective, I also really liked the "Murderbot turns its head to face Gurathin" moment. It was a little awkward (as Murderbot always is), but it was also fun.

I was however generally more frustrated with how the story made Murderbot seem less competent than it is. Not just the carrying Bharadwaj, but also its detachment from the issue with the maps (it's supposed to be more involved in that), and its not pointing out as much how dangerous the company is. In the book, it's clear Murderbot knows more than the crew, but is keeping quiet out of self-preservation, but because those thoughts aren't being shown somehow, it looks more like Murderbot is following the humans' lead, even if Murderbot is clearly more aware of at least some threats, namely leaving the hub without a SecUnit and how dangerous SecUnits are.

The story is a lot more focused on the humans, and that's understandable and honestly expected, but frustrating. I care a lot more about Murderbot (and the criticism of capitalism), not the human dynamics, no matter how much I understand someone jumping Ratthi's bones.

I hope we get more of Murderbot's obsession with drones and how cool they are. We saw the one, which was nice, but that wasn't even one of Murderbot's drones.

I also appreciated we got its insistence on viewing scenes through cameras rather than its eyes. Murderbot is awkward and has anxiety, and although they don't explain why (that it's part of the unintended side effects of Murderbot's design), I enjoyed seeing how it was all executed on-screen, by and large. Murderbot sitting down in the chair was good.

Also yes, while we've argued over this ever since the announcement was made, I do think it is still a missed opportunity - at best - that the main character is played by a cis white man rather than a queer person of color, particularly someone who's non-binary or agender. I think Skarsgard does fine in the role, like I imagined he might. But they could have done a lot more with it. There's a moment where Gurathin looks at Murderbot and says like, "I just look at you and think there's something wrong" and my thought was "yeah, it's that "white men are dangerous" vibe".

Looking forward to Episode 3!

If you haven't read the books, again, consider checking them out! Kobo sells DRM-free copies, too.

[starseneyes]

On Fandom and Shipping

Look, I've not said anything on the whole outcome of last night's 9-1-1 partially because I don't really go here, and partially because I know everyone's emotions are all over the place.

But, just a gentle reminder—the actors don't control the narrative. Yes, there are times that actors can influence it or a Showrunner gives them voice.

The actors went out and did a Press Tour and promised nothing. I mean, nothing. Yes, their natural chemistry was on fire. Yes, certain networks chose to edit pre-recorded interviews in a way that got fans excited and hopeful.

And hope is a dangerous thing when it comes to shipping.

But before I get into all that—below the "read more" cut—let me say this:

Please don't go after the actors.

Don't leave them rude comments. Don't threaten them. They are literally employees doing their job and they promised nothing.

Is their natural chemistry undeniable and sizzling? God, yes. Probably part of why they've been separated in a lot of promotion the past year or so. But they likely had little say in their pairing up for this press push and they handled it as best they could, I think.

Yes, the Press was promoting Buddie in a way that I think we all had to wonder—bait or tease? And there was a healthy dose of skepticism from the fandom, but also a lot of hope.

I've been in fandom forever. I'm old. My first ships were Mulder/Scully and Janeway/Chakotay. I know Ship disappointment and hurt.

And, yes, a different scenario in that we're also talking about the possibility of a MLM romantic pairing that is too often underrepresented on television at a time that LGBTQ+ rights are under attack in the United States.

So, it was nice to surrender skepticism to hope when the signs seemed to be pointing toward something concrete based on the promotion and press.

And, honestly, I love this fandom for its many interpretations of "canon" so "concrete" could mean a million things.

Back in my day, a kiss wasn't even enough. Y'all, if you watch Star Trek: The Next Generation, Troi and Riker are madly in love in one episode and the next he's off-ship flirting with some alien like a lonely bachelor whose only companion has been his hand for too long.

But this fandom seems to say, "Feeling realization? Sure!" "One sided pining, fine!" and so many other variations. The season finale was a big ball of nothing in terms of Buddie, which can feel like whiplash after the feast of 8x17.

I get disappointment. But, please, leave Oliver Stark and Ryan Guzman alone.

Yes, somewhere TPTB decided they needed to pair them up for some interviews—the Thirst Tweets, the Spilling the ETea. Their chemistry is electric. Some people just have that. They do. And that fed into the hope.

But, again, they're doing their jobs. Press is part of the job. And neither is in the mood to lose their job right about now.

Hollywood is functioning at a far smaller capacity than it used to. Even before the fires that plagued L.A. this winter, and the excuse of the Strikes that the Studios have used to shrink show-orders and move production overseas for slightly wider profit margins, the industry has been constricting, somewhat.

These actors are happy to have jobs and don't want to lose them, so they do the work. But they both did their best in their answers to manage expectations while on the red carpet—while trying not to give anything away.

The most out-of-pocket bits are just them being them and they didn't coordinate those shoots. Their reps did because some higher up thought it would be a good idea to set it up.

And, y'all, I'm gonna keep that Thirst Tweets video in my rotations for bad days because it just makes me laugh and sometimes I need to laugh at the absurdity of my life.

So, loves, please don't leave death threats and angry messages and all sorts of attacks on the pages of two people doing their jobs who tried to manage expectations while oozing natural chemistry.

Yes, it felt like something shifted with the promotion and open discussion of Buddie. Maybe they're setting the groundwork for next Season. I have utterly no idea.

And please don't misconstrue this as me telling anyone how to feel!

You can feel hurt. You can feel frustrated. You can feel baited. Absolutely!

All I'm asking is that in our collective hurt we don't take those frustrations out on the wrong person/people.

[wannabanauthor]

I think I would be less angry at Buck

If he talked about his hesitation to get back with Tommy. While Buck screwed things up after the hookup, Tommy was the one that broke up with him.

Maybe he's too scared of screwing up again and driving Tommy away for good. But he's not saying that. He's just doing nothing.

He wants to get back together with Tommy but makes no effort to do so. And he doesn't give a reason why. Or the narrative so far hasn't explicitly said it.

I understand that Buck now has bigger issues than his love life, and he does deserve time to figure himself out and create a new life without Bobby.

So logically, his thing with Tommy is the least of his worries. I can understand if the narrative takes a while to bring Tommy back. But Bobby's death didn't happen in a vacuum.

It came after the breakup and hookup. And Buck hadn't made any effort to fix things with Tommy before Bobby died. He acknowledged that he needed to call and apologize, but then he did absolutely nothing except ask Tommy for a favor.

Even when Tommy said that he was helping for Buck too, Buck still said nothing. And that's the part that irritates me. It looks incredibly one-sided even from a shipper's POV. I can imagine Tommy is thinking the same.

I think maybe Buck forgot that he hasn't told Tommy about his feelings. But that wouldn't make sense either. He knows what he said that morning after and has done nothing about it. He asked Tommy for a favor and thanked him for doing it. That's it.

At this point, I feel like he doesn't even care but claims he does. He never talks to Tommy about their issues, but he'll talk to everyone else and jump the gun. Is he waiting for someone to give him permission or something?

I just hope that he realizes that Tommy is not going to wait around for long. He's in his early 40s, and he wants something serious with someone who is serious about him. Buck isn't that and isn't even trying to be that.

Maybe Buck hasn't realized that he hasn't given Tommy something to wait for. I think the best thing for Season 9 is for Buck to see Tommy dating other people. But then again, Buck might still be stupid and do nothing about it. And it doesn't even match how he was with Tommy in Season 7. In season 7, he made more of an effort, apologized and everything.

This past season he just bitched and moaned about a situation he created but never fixed. Tommy has no reason to reach out to him. Buck's going to take too long and end up losing Tommy for good.

I bet you that Buck won't even mention Tommy in the first few episodes of Season 9. By the time he remembers that Tommy exists, it'll probably have been a year since the breakup.

What's worst for us is that us BuckTommy shippers have 4+ months of nothing before the show comes back. Tim and the writers are letting us stew for months with no progress made and betting on us and others coming back to watch the show. Of course, they're not thinking of that, but Tim really has the worst timing.

The breakup happened the same week as the election. Bobby died and then so did the IRL Pope. And now there's been no progress for BuckTommy, so we get to be angry and frustrated the entire summer and probably talk ourselves out of watching the show again.

Again, Tim Minear is not a good enough writer to keep up this will/won't they trope between Buck and Tommy. I don't know if they're intentionally dragging it out or they just lack common sense or writing skills.

I know 9-1-1 isn't the BuckTommy show, and that there are multiple main characters, but the writing for them has been shitty too. Everyone almost dies or goes through the same type of trauma repeatedly. And they pissed off the Bvddies.

Honestly, only a white man could fuck up a show on so many levels and continue to fuck up with no improvements made. Maybe Tim is phoning it in. I don't know.

It just seems like Tim has made so many bad writing decisions that aren't popular with audience, and he refuses to stop and re-evaluate things to make the show enjoyable again.

[simpfornegan]

rhaenyra asking jace: “and when aemond comes hunting for you?” like yesss, this validated me in so many ways ! next time i say omega jace fleeing from his alpha aemond, chugging moontea and on the verge of a mental breakdown, y’all better jump !

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Hey now, Let her cook!

[psink]

Whilst overall I prefer the manga to the anime, there's one aspect that I think the anime does better - the very ending.

Compared to the manga's very compactly shown thoughts of the cast, the anime gives each of them a short scene.

But although that change already is great, what matters to me the most, is this added scene of Saiko.

Despite it being so short, it feels so fitting and important to Saiko's character, making its absence in the original seem wrong. (They also added Rifuta, though comparatively, her scene isn't so significant.)

[egophiliac]

Have you heard of the "Crowley is Malleus' dad" theory going around? Where Prince Levan (or whatever his name is) didn't actually die and just went out to get some milk and is now known as Dire Crowley, the silly man? The implications of that theory is absolutely hilarious when you think about it

hold on, we can figure this out, we just need LISTS

PROS THAT CROWLEY IS SECRETLY REVAAN/LEVAN/LAVERNE/WHATEVER:

unspecified fae of some kind, with similar coloring to Mal

the animal masks are apparently a Briar Valley thing

has some kind of big blackmailable secret that was alluded to in episode 4, and then as far as I know never brought up again

(unless this was just Azul bullshitting, which is extremely possible)

based on Diablo, which...maybe means something?

has canonically worn Dad Shorts

CONS:

(gestures to Crowley's entire personality)

NO LISTEN Revaan was the guy they sent off on diplomatic missions and to take care of delicate political situations, and...look, I love this dweeb, but would you trust Crowley to be in charge of negotiating your war treaties

despite my brain insisting on reading his name as "Raven", Revaan's title does imply that he was also a dragon (or super into longan berries, I'm not ruling that out)

currently unclear why Lilia "my closest friend Revaan...he is no longer with us...I used to make fun of him for being kind of a priss about eating jerky..." Vanrouge has somehow not noticed or said anything

Malleus' Aloof Anime ~Aristocrat~ vibe had to come from somewhere, and by all accounts it was NOT his mom's side of the family

???:

turns into a bird in the opening, I don't know if that means anything but it's kinda cool, I guess

all that aside, if Malleus and Yuu are any indication, then the Draconias have...questionable taste in their social choices. so anything is possible!