#the beautiful life they both are important for

[porcelain-and-nightbird]

OH MY GOD THIS POST YESSSS

I need more portrayals in fanfictions about Steven being angry and scared because they always write about him being too understanding.

He may be more understanding now if he found out about Jake in a second season...but even in cases someone writes an AU of the first interaction between Steven and Marc, or even with Jake, Steven believes everything right away. Like, someone is taking your "normal life" and putting it upside down, REACT!

Maybe writers want to write him like that because they want them to have a good relationship fast but they are stripping Steven of his number one coping mechanism: "denial, denial, denial".

Marc's situation, on the other hand, is just tragic in the first episodes. He took the time to "parent" Steven, take care of his illusion of normality, and also had to take all the insults (ok, most of them, not the ones that involved Layla) in stride because he believed he didn't deserve anything good (and if someone who he believed was truly good told him he was bad, then hey! It must be true).

That's why when Steven learns the whole truth and sees their actions for what they truly were (both his denial and Marc acting as a kindness to Steven) that this scene becomes so freaking important.

JESUS THIS SCENE BREAKS ME

TLDR: WATCH MOON KNIGHT AND CRY BECAUSE OF BEAUTIFUL WRITING

You’ve got to live a happy, simple, normal life. You understand? [But it was all a lie, wasn’t it?] So what? What does it matter?

[capquinn]

Sünneli | N. Hischier

summary: when nico holds his baby girl for the first time, it feels like the world has rearranged itself around her. she was born with the sun, slipping into the world as it woke, and before he even realises it, he's giving her a name that feels like it was always meant to be hers... pairing: nico hischier x reader content: dad!nico, fluff word count: 1.3k note: i finally birthed my teeny tiny dad!nico au. hope u enjoy cutie pies <3 ↪masterlist

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The hospital room is quiet, bathed in the soft golden light of early morning, the world outside just beginning to wake. The air is still, thick with the kind of hush that lingers after something monumental, something life-changing.

Just a few hours ago, his entire world shifted.

His baby girl was born.

The night had blurred into dawn, exhaustion hanging heavy in the space, but Nico? He doesn’t feel it. He hasn’t stopped looking at her since she was placed in his arms, like his body physically won’t let him look away.

He’s completely wrapped up in her, holding her with a care so instinctual it’s like he was made for this. She’s so small, so impossibly new, her features delicate and soft beneath the warm glow of the sun spilling through the window. His hand — large and steady, his grip still carrying the faintest tremor of disbelief — rests over her tiny back, his thumb tracing slow, gentle strokes against the fabric of her swaddle.

His voice is barely a whisper when he speaks, so soft it barely carries beyond the space between them. He murmurs to her in Swiss, the words slipping from his lips low and full of quiet awe.

"Du bisch so perfekt," he breathes, his lips brushing against the top of her head, lingering there for a moment as if he can’t quite believe she’s real. You are so perfect. "So schön, so klein…" So beautiful, so small...

He rocks her without thinking, the motion smooth and rhythmic, his body moving on instinct to soothe her, to keep her close. Her tiny breaths are warm against his chest, her little mouth occasionally forming sleepy, barely-there movements, like she’s dreaming. Like she knows she’s home. And Nico thinks he could stay like this forever — just holding her, memorising the weight of her in his arms, the way she feels right there, pressed against his heartbeat.

For the first time since she arrived, the room feels still. The tension, the exhaustion, the rush of the last few hours — it’s melted into something softer now, something full and quiet and settled.

He lets out a slow breath, glancing over at you, expecting to find you asleep at last. But you’re awake—exhausted, yes, but completely wrapped up in the moment, watching him with an expression so full of love it makes his breath catch.

He doesn’t say anything, just holds your gaze, his arms tightening ever so slightly around the tiny bundle in his chest, like he’s silently sharing this feeling with you. You both stay like that for a moment, bathed in the soft glow of dawn, the weight of everything settling between you.

You look so tired, but there’s a warmth in your eyes, something Nico knows he’ll carry with him forever. You fought so hard to bring her into the world, gave everything to make this moment possible, and now you’re here, looking at him like he’s holding the most precious thing in existence. Because he is.

His lips twitch into the softest smile, small but full of love. He shifts slightly, adjusting your baby girl against his chest, as if to say, "look at her. Look what we made."

And he doesn’t have to say it out loud — because you are looking. And you see it. See him. See the way he’s holding her like she’s the most fragile, most important thing he’s ever touched. See the way his whole world has clicked into place, like this is who he was always meant to be, like fatherhood isn’t something new but something he was always waiting to step into, something written into his very being.

You watch as his lips part, like he wants to say something but can’t quite find the words. Instead, he exhales softly, voice barely more than a breath.

"Thank-you."

Two simple words, but they wreck you.

It’s the way he says them — quiet, thick with emotion, like they hold everything he can’t put into words. Like he’s not just thanking you for this moment, for the little life curled against his chest, but for everything. For every day you spent carrying her, for every exhausted breath, for bringing her into the world, for changing his forever.

His heart swells, stretching wide, impossibly full, spilling over with something bigger than words, bigger than him. His breath shudders, his throat tightens, and before he can stop it, his eyes burn with the threat of tears.

He blinks quickly, tilting his head slightly, gaze shifting toward the window as he tries to steady himself, to catch his breath.

The early morning light spills into the room, golden and soft, stretching across the floor, casting warm edges over the bed, over you, over her. The world outside is waking slowly, painted in delicate hues of pink and orange, dawn easing into full daylight.

But even as he stares out at the horizon, he can still feel her — the gentle weight of her against his chest, the warmth of her tiny body snug against his.

And somehow, that makes it worse. Makes it more.

Like the feel of her, the reality of her pressed so close, amplifies everything. Every emotion swells, raw and overwhelming, catching in his throat. His love for her, for you, for this moment — it’s too much and somehow not enough, all at once.

He glances down again, eyes still damp, heart still aching, and there she is. So small. So new. So impossibly perfect.

And it hits him.

She was born with the sun, slipping into the world as it woke, as if she already belonged to it.

And then, without thinking, the words just come, soft and instinctive.

"Mein Sünneli."

He doesn’t even register that he said it — too caught up in the way she stirs slightly against him, making the tiniest, warmest little sound. His heart aches with it, with how much he loves her, with how much he already belongs to her.

It isn’t until you speak — your voice quiet, amused, full of warmth — that he blinks, finally glancing up at you.

"Sünneli?" you repeat, the word unfamiliar on your tongue, tilting your head slightly as you shift against the pillows, exhaustion still weighing on you.

His brows furrow for a second, like he’s trying to replay the moment in his head, and then it clicks. He glances back down at her, at the way the first light of the morning spills over her tiny, perfect features.

A small, breathy chuckle escapes him, barely there. His fingers brush gently over the fine, downy hair on her head, his voice nothing more than a whisper as he answers.

"Little sun."

He looks back at you then, something so tender, so unshakable in his expression, like there is no other name in the world that could ever fit her the way this one does.

"She’s my little sun."

And that’s it. From that moment on, she’s Sünneli.

It comes so naturally, like it was always meant to be hers. He calls her that again later, when the room is quiet and still, just the soft hum of the world outside, the warmth of her tiny body resting against his bare chest. His fingertips trace the impossibly small curve of her hand, following the gentle rise and fall of her breaths, and the word falls from his lips like second nature, like a prayer whispered just for her.

He says it the next morning too, when she stretches in his arms, letting out the tiniest, sleepiest sound that destroys him, her little face scrunching up before settling again. He presses his lips to her head, breathes her in, and murmurs it against her soft skin.

And every single day after.

Sometimes it’s Sünneli, whispered into her hair as he rocks her in the quiet of the night. Other times, it’s Sunny, slipping easily into English, spoken with a soft smile as she blinks up at him, eyes round and curious, tiny fingers wrapping around his.

No matter which language, no matter how many years pass, it never changes. Because from the moment she entered the world, she was his — his light, his warmth, his brightest, warmest thing.

His little sun.

[elliewrites77]

Yapper!Gojo Modern AU

Yapper!Gojo who's best friend is the least talkative person he knows, even more so than Geto. Even after weeks of sharing a class, it was a full month of being classmates before he heard her voice.

Yapper!Gojo who doesn't pressure you to talk. He does plenty talking for the both of you, and somehow knows that you don't mind. A big part of your friendship is the fact that their is an unspoken connection, and you both tend to understand each other naturally. He talks, you listen, and you both enjoy the dynamic.

Yapper!Gojo who knows when you're uncomfortable or overwhelmed without you even needing to say anything. Maybe it's because you're always on his mind or his attention is always on you, but somehow, he just knows.

Yapper!Gojo who doesn't hide his affection for you. Sure, he doesn't come right out and say "i'm in love with you", because he does have a secret fear of being rejected by you, but he loves calling you pet names, loves physical touch like holding your hand, and stuff that some would say are obvious signs of feelings. and you always reciprocate, maybe not to the same extent, but still.

Yapper!Gojo who only shuts up when he insists on joining you in the campus library to study (you're studying, he..isn't). He knows how important finals are to you, but won't stand to not see you all week, so he invites himself to your study session. You barely acknowledge his presence in the small room, but you both know you are happy he is there with you.

Yapper!Gojo who finally plans to tell you his feelings after finals are over. You both have one semester left before graduating, and since he doesn't know where life will take you guys after college (though he intends to keep you in his life) he figures it's better to do it sooner rather than later. So he devises this elaborate plan, even forcing Suguru, Shoko, and Nanami to help him (all of which said he should just tell you without anything 'big').

Yapper!Gojo who almost has a panic attack when the day finally comes. Finals were over, and Christmas break was the best time to do it. So while you thought you two were just going out for a "friend-date" to a nice resturant Satoru wanted to try, he was panicking thinking about everything that could go wrong afterwards.

Yapper!Gojo who is suspiciously quiet throughout dinner. Not entirely silent, he could never be, but still. It was strange. So strange that you were more talkative, though most of what you said consisted of asking him if he was okay multiple times.

Yapper!Gojo who can't help but admire how beautiful you look on the way from the restaurant. He had asked if you'd mind one more stop, a surprise. So as you sat next to him, he stole multiple glances. Eventually, something about being so close to you made his anxiety calm.

Yapper!Gojo who covers your eyes when you arrive to the spot, helping you out of the car carefully. He guides you to the spot, taking a deep breath before he uncovers your eyes and allow you to adjust.

Yapper!Gojo who watches impatiently as you blink, your eyes flitting around the area. For the first time ever, he is anxious at your silence. He can't read it, and it worries him.

Quiet!reader who looks around at the University quad. There was a specific area that had a small gazebo and a few trees, a nice little patch that Gojo and you called "your spot". it had been the place where you first spoke to him. It was the place you guys always went to relax, to talk, to destress when everywhere else got too much. and now, it was lit up with fairy lights throughout the gazebo, a hammock connecting two trees, and a small blanket laid out on the ground with a beautiful bouquet of flowers, and two pillows laid on top.

Yapper!Gojo who stays silent as he waits for you to process it. Once you look at him, though, he gulps and moves closer, swiping the flowers up as he moves. He holds them out to you.

"I know this is unexpected, but I just finally wanted to tell you that I'm in love with you. And I know you don't like big, extravagant stuff, but I really need this to be perfect and still show just how much I feel for you." He slightly rambles, his hand rubbing the back of his neck in nerves.

Yapper!Gojo who is silenced by the feeling of your lips on his. His eyes flutter closed as he kisses back, the fireworks between you exploding in his chest. And even though you don't say it, he knows instantly you've felt the same,

Yapper!Gojo who reluctantly lets you pull back after a long, loving kiss. but he doesn't regret it when you whisper the four words he had been longing to hear.

"I love you too."

Quiet!reader who may not talk much, and may be able to leave things unsaid with Satoru, but will never hesitate to tell him exactly how she feels about him.

------

not proofread

[bunny-jpeg]

sinful sentences (six)

franco colapinto - "how do you like that?"

tags: smut/pwp, phone/facetime sex, mutual masturbation, voice kink, dirty talk

sinful sentences catalogue

weeks apart, you have been apart for weeks. while formula one had been a blessing to franco, it had be a source of personal hell for you. while his karting career meant he was away a lot, at least the schedule allowed you to visit him more often. but with you wrapped up in your own academic work, you had been without the touch of your lover for close to four weeks now.

and things were getting dire for you. you missed sleepy mornings together, you missed the good luck kisses, you missed his jokes and his laugh. you missed the smell of him after a shower (sometimes after a work out) - he was such an important part of your life that without it everything felt grayer.

you tried to keep a positive outlook though, you cheered him on and watched every race. you were his number on fan on top of being his lover. but you could only masturbate so many times with your face in his pillow before you started to get cramps in your hands.

but a small saving grace came when you got a text message from franco asking if you wanted to facetime - "i miss you, my love. i want to see your face once more!"

you were both sexually needy. franco wanted you and casual catch-up turned into him without his shirt on and his hand grasped around his cock in his sweatpants. his breathing heavy as he positioned his phone up against some pillows. to eye you with heat while he pleasured himself.

you did the same before you kicked off your sweatpants and took off your (formerly his) t-shirt. he caught sight of your breasts and gripped his cock a little tighter to off-set the throb of erection. you drove him crazy, you were something else entirely. that was why he wanted you so badly, why he craved for you the way someone craved food or water. your pretty tits were a life source for him.

"i wish you were here right now. i wish i was back home in your bed. does it still smell like me, angel? you know i have one of your sweaters, sadly it accidentally got covered in cum. but when i get home, i'm going to put it on you and fuck you right up against your dresser until all those little toys fall off." his voice was heavy with lust, his breathing was heavy as he got his cock out of his sweatpants. he couldn't take anymore. not while you looked so beautiful for him.

"i miss you franco." you said softly, "i'm so proud of you, but i miss our time together. i want you, fuck. anyway i can have you, i just need you, honey." you started to rub your achy clit, your wetness got all over the fabric of your panties and seeped through onto your hand.

the feeling was intense as you two started to pleasure yourselves. franco's phone fell over once and he was quick to move it back as he stroked his cock quickly. pleasure zapped through your bodies, even so much space between you two, you felt the connectivity between you two. the closeness you shared as you masturbated together.

"i missed you too." he groaned, "every day we are apart, it feels like days upon days. i missed you, i missed our home. i miss the way you laugh and how you look when you are asleep. and i know that you think you look ugly when you sleep, but i love it. i love all of you." he groaned as he continued to pleasure himself. his hand fisted his cock as he felt the pleasure leap through his body.

he kept his eyes near glued to the screen by him, the sight of your hands in between your legs. you looked beautiful in a way that words failed him. the usual charming franco colapinto was at a loss for words in regards to your beauty. knowing that you were touching yourself because of him, that you couldn't deny yourself pleasure in regards to your lover.

"you'll be home soon, and when you come home, i'm going to make it special. because you've been working so hard, i miss you. but i'm so proud." you whimpered as you touched yourself further. you could feel the pleasure through your body the more you touched yourself, "i'll make our reunion special, babe. that's a promise." the words were filthy and he loved it, he loved you.

"i'll take care of you, my love." he said softly, "make up for lost time. you and i, you better buy enough groceries for two weeks because we won't be leaving the apartment." he chuckled lowly, "i want to remember every part of you while we are apart."

franco wanted to touch you. he wanted his strong hands up and down your body, he wanted to feel his lover under his touch. he wanted to hit your sweet spot, the spots you couldn't quite reach. he wanted to feel your climax and then kiss your heated skin once you came down from the high. he wanted everything, he was a lover in that way. the kind that wanted you in every capacity. just one of the funner ways was to fuck you.

facetime would just have to make due until he finally got his hands back on you. to see you on the screen masturbating did arouse him greatly. he tensed his grasp around his cock as he continued to let his mouth run with his affection towards you. "you look beautiful, even with that shit camera of your phone. but i know your body anywhere. look at your breasts, your pussy. that look on your face." he purred as he continued to stroke. he could feel the want in his body as he made the pleasure grow in his core.

"how do you like that?" you asked, near pathetic.

"my hand is nothing like you. but, i'll think about when i see you again. two more races and then i am all yours. just as you are mine, right?" he panted heavily as the pleasure raced through him further. he could feel the tension in his body from the intense feeling of it all. his heart hammered and he could feel it down to his feet.

"sweet talker."

he chuckled, "only for you, my love. only you make me act like this. when i'm with you, i lose control. even over a screen, i want you. fuck, i need you." he licked his lips as the pleasure continued to mount in his body. he stroked his cock heavier and let the pleasure wash over him. the thrill of want in his core only grew the more he touched himself. he switched up the pace every so often to keep the pleasure throbbing in his brain.

"i love you, franco." you groaned.

"and i love you." he replied. he watched you through half-lidded eyes as you brought yourself to climax. he said as you panted through climax, "when i come home, you'll get the real thing. i promise." there was a lust to his words that only emboldened you to continued to pleasure yourself through orgasm.

and it excite franco enough to finish as well. he came with a groan and tried to bite back his words getting too loud. williams didn't need to know what he was getting up to tonight. the pleasure washed over him as you teased your clit to the sight of him orgasming.

you soon both stopped your pace and laid out on your respective beds. you brought the phone closer to him and looked at his flushed expression. you giggled and made kissing noises towards the camera which made him laugh a little.

"a few more weeks, my love. then i am back home and i'm back in your arms." he smiled dreamily at you, "i'm thinking maybe, after the season, i can take some of the racing money and we can go somewhere for the holidays. i want to make up for all the time we're apart. what do you say?"

his gesture made your cheeks heat up a little bit. you replied as franco got a good look at your face on the screen, "make me finish harder than i just did. and i'll go anywhere with you."

"then, my love, i suggest you pack your bags." <3

[jugheadtheredhead]

now that this is making its rounds again, it’s even more important than ever to foster and grow this hope. im a young queer woman living in the united states rn, do you think that i do not see horrors? i live in a red state. i wake up everyday with crippling fear, but do you know what keeps me going?

hope. that is what keeps me going.

hope doesn’t look like me blindly optimistic about everything and the fact that people think that that is what this post means breaks my heart. hope is knowing things are bad and wanting to change that. so many people have spread hate on this post and missed the point that both op and i were trying to make, hope is so much stronger than fear. every revolution started with hope. every rebellion. every movement. and that is what i say in my original post.

because the world and humanity at its core is beautiful. people can be beautiful. if we work together to take down the people who want us to be scared, who want us to give up, we can build the world that this post is about.

and listen: they take away our rights, they censor our media, they send away our friends, they rob us blind, and you’re really gonna let them take away your hope too? that is exactly what they want. don’t become complacent, don’t say “oh well things are just terrible and that’s life”, because you can make a change.

hope is not ignorance. i am not ignorant. hope is diving into the abyss scared as shit but the only way out is through and there is always, always a light at the end of the tunnel.

i have seen the abyss too. have sat in the abyss. have let it consume me. i will not let the darkness win, i will not live in the abyss forever. why choose darkness and nihilism when you can choose light and be the change you want to see?

In the future, children will think our ways are strange. "Why do old people always grow so much milkweed in their gardens?" they'll say. "Why do old people always write down when the first bees and butterflies show up? Why do old people hate lawn grass so much? Why do old people like to sit outside and watch bees?"

We will try to explain to them that when we were young, most people's yards were almost entirely short grass with barely any flowers at all, and it was so commonplace to spray poisons to kill insects and weeds that it was feared monarch butterflies and American bumblebees would soon go extinct. We will show them pictures of sidewalks, shops, and houses surrounded by empty grass without any flowers or vegetables and they will stare at them like we stared at pictures of grimy children working in coal mines

[fandom-rants-here]

I need Mike to confess first. And I need Will to not believe him.

something something...

"Will, I promise you I am not lying. This isn't- this isn't any prank or trick or mischief or whatever you think is going on here. I am telling you that I am in love with you. I always have been."

There are audible tremors in Mike's voice and he thinks he feels tears falling down his face.

"Whatever I had with El was not love. It was coincidence and my own cowardice that brought and held us together. It was dumb luck I met her. But you know who I was looking for that day? It was you, Will. It's always been you. I chose to walk up to you on that playground 10 years ago. I chose to ask you to be my friend. I chose you. "

Even if Mike had the confidence to look towards Will, his eyes were blurred with tears and he couldn't even see the ground they were falling on.

"I'm sorry for what I said at the pizza shop. It was- I was lying. I was just saying what I thought she needed to hear again and I really don't know why cause it never works and you were right there and it fucking hurt to lie so much and you didn't deserve that, you- Will, my life didn't start the day I met El in the woods, not in the way I implied, at least. You were missing, most thought you were dead or would be soon. We were all so hurt and lost without you. Joyce seemed half hysterical, Jonathan- I'd never seen him so sad, and we, The Party, we didn't know what to do without you. I felt like death, like I'd died without you to keep me alive. But then we found El and she- if she could be lost in the woods and found, so could you. And then- then she recognized your photo and she knew who you were and she flipped the board to show you were in the Upside Down and- and meeting El wasn't my life starting. It was hope restarting it, hope that she could get you back to us."

They stood and he wasn't sure if Will was nearly as frozen as he was, but it took him several moments to regain any thoughts and then continue speaking.

"Will, I've known I was in love with you for years, now. But the love has been there far longer. You- you're amazing, Will. You're so smart, even if you suck at math. You capture beauty in ever drawing and painting you make, creating it from sheer care and adoration alone, when you have to. You consider other's thoughts and feelings before you do or say anything, no matter how angry you are. You're such a quick thinker, it's scary sometimes. Not- not really, but you get the idea. You're the most level headed person inside of a group where everyone else is about 10 seconds away from murdering each other. You're patient, gentle, honest, hilarious, and you're also, like, super handsome. I couldn't live without you, without my cleric. I almost didn't. You've saved me more times than you know. Because, Will, you are so strong and so resilient. You've survived and endured more than anyone ever should be forced to yet you remain kind. You called me the heart, in the van. And don't even try to say that's all El, you and I both know that she doesn't think that and that you're a terrible liar. But, really, Will? Me, the heart? Will, that has always been you. You bring together and unite people. You bring out the best in people, even when they're cruel or being assholes or telling you things that aren't meant for you but for themselves. You have always been the heart of this party. You've always been my heart."

The weight of their matching watches is heavy on Mike's wrist, the syncronized ticks breaking the stark silence every second. And, as he finally lifted his head up, Mike once again saw that Will had already been staring.

For once, Mike doesn't look away. Rather, he takes a few hesitant steps closer.

"I love you, Will Byers. You are my best friend, my first friend, my childhood crush, my gay realization, my tether to reality, my cleric, and you have been the most important person in my life since you entered it. Maybe even before. Maybe I had carved out a space knowing one day you'd fill it."

[shiftingmegs]

》 Percy Jackson DR 《

I understand that some of the stuff was written to make the story more convenient BUT i did said that there was a lot of stuff i would change if i created a Percy Jackson DR so here's a list of some of it:

》 The Gods are Greek

By that I mean: There's no reason for them to simply leave Greece. MT. Olympus is still in Greece, but now they have acess points around the globe (including empire state building).

And they work on the Greek calendar, wich is very inconvenient for us because of the 7 hours diference between New York and Greece. (This also include when Persephone is on the underworld)

》 The no-more-kids deal doesn’t exist

Honestly i understand the reason to have your main character be super special but the reason behind this deal between the big 3 always felt icky to me but There's still a very small number of them because:

Hades doesn’t have any half-blood kids (he is the only one in mythology that doesn’t cheat. I'm keeping his honor)

Poseidon doesn’t have a lot of Half-bloods, most of his relationships are with Nymphs

And Zeus just don't claim majority of his kids

》 Ares and His Daughters

Ares is the God of War and protector of Women he would not hate his daughter or think any less of them for the reason of they being women

》 Greek Texts

We are Dyslexic because our brains are suposed to read in Greek so everything written in the camp is in Greek (not just Greek letters on american phrases, but actually written in Greek)

》 Technology

I really don't understand why being a demigod would mean not being able to use Technology and also there's kids in the camp with at least one worried parent BUT i also dont wanna be addicted to my phone so there's 2 places where you can have access to technology on the camp: The Main Office (i'm not calling it the other name) and with Luke.

》 Athena doesn’t have kids

No i did not script Annabeth out (i like her, at least in the movie version because i'm shifting to the movie).

Being a virgin Goddess is important for the myth of Athena so she doesn’t have kids, not biological kids at least. The situation is more like Athena sees a kid that have a high mental potencial and a shitty home life and she "adopts" them.

》 Bathrooms

I don't rebember what the situation around bathrooms in the cabins is but just to be safe i did script that we have them both inside and outside of the cabins because i can't imagine having having to walk outside if i ever want to use the bathroom in the middle of the night.

》 Religious Practices

Just a reminder that Greek Mythology is a actual religion and if we are living in a world where we have 100% certain that theses Gods exist (and we are Their kids) why wouldn't we follow the religion.

That includes burning the food, altars in the cabins, prayers and festivals.

》 Smaller magics

This one is more because i'm a daughter of Apollo (i may think about what would it be for the other Gods later on) but i scripted a lot of smaller magical moments/abilities to me and my siblings.

Mostly because overworked God= overpowered kids

》 How the Gods Look Like

So for faceclaims i'm using mostly the same as the movies, exepect for Mr.D who looks like the Series. Aphrodite looks different from person to person (Who's the most beautiful woman to you it's how she looks like)

But the most important: All the Gods look like adults

[lonely-ey3s]

With All My Love : Chapter 12 | love letters - part one

Chapter 12 : Love Letters pt. 1

Pairings: joel miller x f!reader (no outbreak)

Word count: 12.6k

Chapter Summary: Joel prepares to ask you a very important question today that he's been preparing to ask you for the last few weeks. Will you pick up on what's going on with the shift of energy and routine or will you be utterly surprised?

Chapter warnings: Chapter warnings: SMUT (18+ MDNI), public-ish sex, unprotected piv, anxiety, flashbacks of traumatic memories (for both reader and joel), mentions of PTSD anxiety, FLUFF, joel being an absolute lover, soft!joel, use of Spanish but with translations, lying to partner (justified), use of y/n, parental abandonment, domestic abuse/assault, some angst?, if i missed any lmk

A/N: enjoy my loves ❣️

Dividers by: @saradika-graphics 

Main Masterlist

Saturday, October 23rd

Joel had tossed and turned all night, unable to sleep due to the amount of nerves and excitement he was feeling. Today was it. 

He had everything planned to the T, this wasn’t going to be some spontaneous “Will You Marry Me?” in the middle of nowhere. No, you deserved more than that. He put so much thought and effort into this that Maria teased him for the absolute attention to detail he had possessed in this process. 

Sarah had been involved with everything behind the scenes, the same with Maria and Tommy. Elena even helped by distracting you and asking if you’d go get your nails done with her and Maria, her treat. You had no idea it was deliberate, you didn’t even think to assume something was up, Joel told you she wanted to get to know you both more and that was her love language. 

You had no idea of the plan; everything had been kept so airtight that when Joel mentioned he had plans this weekend, you just thought after the week you had gone through with Reggie’s passing and your PTSD that Joel was just giving you extra attention. 

Your alarm went off around 6 am to just get up, however, you snoozed it and rolled over, falling back asleep. 

Joel turned on his side and watched you sleep, with eyes full of love and adoration. He watched how your lips would curl involuntarily into a small smile as you slept, how you’d hum when you were dreaming, and Levi was right, you did a cute little leg kick when you were deep in sleep. Joel laid there and thought of every possible scenario he wanted to have with you. 

How it would be to hear a baby cry in the morning to wake up instead of that god-awful alarm tone. 

How beautiful you’d be with his baby in your womb, how you’d glow. He wanted that more than anything, to give you a baby. 

He thought about what your wedding might be. Would you want something big or small and intimate? He couldn’t wait to become your husband and you would be his wife. His wife… that had a ring to it. 

He thought about how he wanted to give you everything you ever needed in this world, he thrived in taking care of you, but there was something about vowing to do it for the rest of his days that put a jolt of joy into him, vowing to you, swearing his life to you. 

Since you had come into his life, he looked at everything from a completely different angle. Things that used to feel like he was suffocating or drowning felt warm and refreshing. He was cold, reserved, and just moving through life before you, trying to get to the next day. He now experiences the day and is always conscious of being in the moment. He wants to remember everything from the way you laughed at something so simple to the smile you gave when you looked at a pretty flower on the sidewalk. 

You stirred in your sleep and crunched your nose sighing deeply as you adjusted to lay closer to Joel.

He smiled and softly traced his fingers up your arm and then back down, feeling your soft skin on his fingertips. 

He whispered as he kissed your temple, “Mi corazón late por ti…” (My heart beats for you…) 

You snuggled closer to him and smiled softly, taking in a deep breath, keeping your eyes closed, voice soft with sleep, “Say more things in Spanish…” you giggled. 

He chuckled, and looked at you, continuing to trace his hands up and down your skin, “Tienes una sonrisa hermosa...” (You have a beautiful smile.)

You blushed and hid your face for a moment in the pillow. 

Joel kissed your cheek, “¿Puedo ver tus ojos?” (May I see your eyes) 

You shyly looked up at him, smiling, “¿Cómo dices? Brown eyes?” 

He laid his head down on his pillow while keeping eyes on you, “Ojos marrones…” he smiled. 

You nodded, “Amo tus grandes ojos marrones…” (I love your big brown eyes)

Joel chuckled softly and blushed, “Gracias, mi vida…”

He moved his hand up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, studying the freckles on your cheeks, memorizing the constellations.

You blushed under his gaze. You looked at his features, gently putting your hand on his chest, then looking at his lips before looking up at his eyes, he was doing the same, and you blushed a little more. 

He wasted not a moment, putting your chin in his grasp and pulling you towards his lips, kissing you gently once before pulling back for a moment, “I’m so in love with you…” before crashing his lips onto yours, kissing you more deeply and passionately. 

He pulled you closer by taking you by your waist, pulling you against him. You put your leg over his waist and maneuvered yourself to straddle him, never leaving his lips. 

He sat up with you on his lap and wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you close to him, meeting it with the other hand that was gently kneading your other hip, grinding your hips slowly onto his cock, devouring your lips. 

You comb through his hair gently, pulling him closer gently, breathing heavily and heated as his lips move from your lips to your neck, chest, and shoulder, feverishly littering you with his kisses. 

You giggle when his stubble runs across a part of your neck more sensitive than the rest, making him grin against your skin, “Ticklish there?” 

You nodded, smiling, “Seems so…” you giggled and leaned back a little to look a him, “Don’t get any ideas…” you smiled and put your hand on his chest to hold him back, eyes narrowing. 

He grinned and grabbed the back of your knees and moved so now you were on your back, making you giggle as he went to kiss and tickle that spot, also moving his hands to tickle your sides, making you laugh and squirm as you tried to push him off, “Joel! Stop I’m gonna pee!” you giggled under him. 

He chuckled which turned into a laugh when you said that and he pulled away, smiling as he hovered over you. 

You slowly stopped giggling and looked up at him, smiling lovingly. He moved down to kiss you when Sarah knocked on the door, making him sigh and lean his head against your shoulder, groaning quietly. 

“I’m making breakfast! Wake up!” she shouted then ran downstairs to the kitchen.

You chuckled, “Wonder what the special occasion is…” you smiled and put your hand on his cheek, pulling him to your lips, kissing him gently, whispering against his lips, “Whatever it is, it can wait 5 minutes, yeah?” you gently kissed him again, biting his bottom lip and pulling on it softly. 

He groaned and nodded, settling between your legs, cock rock hard, leaking precum as he quickly pulled his boxers down and moved your panties to the side, “Oh baby 5 minutes is being generous… te he estado deseando toda la mañana…” (I’ve wanted you all morning…) he growled before sinking deep into you, growling as he leaned back in to kiss you deeply as you moaned against his lips. 

—

Ok, it was more like 10 minutes, but he couldn’t get enough of you this morning and you wondered what had gotten into him. 

You came downstairs to Sarah cooking a whole spread of breakfast items. She had pancakes, bacon, toast, and eggs ready to go on plates to serve yourself at the counter. 

You looked around and then came up and kissed her head as she was turning over pancakes, “This all looks amazing, what’s the occasion?” you chuckled. 

She smiled and looked back at you, “Does there need to be an occasion for me to cook you guys breakfast?” 

You held your hands up defensively and shook your head, “No ma’am…” 

Joel came down shortly after dressed in a cream-colored henley that was a quarter button-up, dark wash jeans, and his nice boots. “Smells great baby girl, thank you!” 

He came up and kissed Sarah’s cheek then came up and put his hand on the small of your back, kissing your shoulder softly. 

You blushed and loaded some food onto your plate before going to sit at the table, waiting for the others to join you before eating a bite. 

Joel got a cup of coffee for you and set it by your plate, kissing your head softly before grabbing his plate and cup of coffee and sitting at the table. Sarah came a moment after with her plate and glass of orange juice. 

The three of you ate together for the next hour. It became a routine every Saturday to at least eat one meal together, catch up on the week, and plan for the one following so that you all were on the same page, however, today’s felt different and you couldn’t put your finger on why. You felt like something was going on that you didn’t know about as you kept catching Joel wink at Sarah or Sarah make a statement that might mean one thing to you but to Joel, it meant something entirely different. 

You got up to clean your plate when the garage door opened and in walked Tommy and Maria, “Somethin’ smells good!” Tommy bellowed from the garage before walking up the steps into the kitchen. 

“I cooked breakfast! There’s some leftover on the counter, help yourselves.” Sarah looked back at the two of them smiling. 

It wasn’t unusual for Tommy and Maria to show up out of nowhere, they did surprise visits constantly, but they usually kept to themselves on Saturdays as they knew that was a day for you three to spend together after a crazy week. 

You rinsed off your plate, Maria came by you as she piled some pancakes on her plate, “Hey, you wanna go dress shopping with me for a few hours? I have that job interview on Monday and need something to wear…” she smiled and nudged you gently. 

You looked up at her “Uhm, I think Joel had plans for us today…” you smiled. 

Joel stood up and smiled, “My plans aren’t til later baby, you can go shoppin’ if you want…” he came over and kissed your cheek, putting his plate in the sink to wash it. 

You looked at him and then Maria, “Oh, ok. Yeah, sure, wanna go after this?” you smiled. 

She nodded, “Yeah, what time should I have her back here?” she looked at Joel and took a bite of some bacon. 

“4 pm at the latest?” he smiled and walked away drying his hands on a paper towel and then putting it into the trash. 

You smiled, “Do I need to change for these plans or is this dress ok to wear?” you had on a new floral sun dress you had found while thrifting last week. One that Joel mentioned he wanted to see you in as soon as possible. You thought today would be a good day to wear it considering you guys are going out. 

He smiled brightly, “You look breathtaking in anything, anything will do for where we are going…” he came over and pecked your lips. 

You blushed and nodded then cleared your throat, “I’ll be home by 4 then…” you looked away shyly and filled your mug up with some more coffee. 

Reader’s POV

Maria finished up her breakfast and then you two left.

You went to the mall first and she dragged you to a department store to pick out a few pencil skirts, dress shirts, formal dresses, and other things like cardigans, sweaters, and shoes.

You were sitting in the dressing room in the waiting area when she came out to show you the outfit she had put together. It was some corduroy brown pants with a white button-down and then a sweater over it, very comfy but yet professional in your opinion. She turned to look at herself in the mirror, “Thoughts?” she asked smiling and turning to look at the angles. 

You were lost in thought, messing with a loose thread on the chair you were sitting on. 

“Y/N?” Maria chuckled and turned towards you.  

You snapped out of your thought and looked up at her, “Hmm?” 

She smiled, “Where’s your mind?” 

You bit your lip and looked down at the thread, “Just in my head… don’t mind me.” you sighed softly then looked up and put on a smile, “I like that outfit, maybe you could add a cute belt? Wear those cute flats you got the other week?” you suggested trying to change the subject. 

Maria nodded, agreeing with your suggestions, “I like that idea, I’ll look for a belt.” she  turned back towards the mirror and then bit the inside of her cheek, “What’s goin’ on in that head?” 

You shook your head, “Nothin’ just… somethin’ feels odd about today, but I can’t put my finger on it – like I feel like I’m missin’ something or forgot somethin’...” your foot began to bounce, an anxiety tick you’d developed subconsciously. 

Maria looked back at you, you were starting to pick up on the energy that everyone was most likely exuding today from the excitement of what was going to happen. She shrugged, “Hmm, I’m sure it’s nothing, just an off day?” she smiled at you, trying to keep you at bay. 

You nodded and took a breath, smiling softly, “You’re right, it’s probably nothing.” you cleared your throat and sat up to focus more, “Have we tried on that pencil skirt yet?” 

She shook her head and started heading back to her changing room, “That’s next…” she closed the door. 

You cleared your throat, “How are things going with you and Tommy?” 

“Good! We had a conversation the other day about how we both feel about marriage, which was surprising.” she came out with the pencil skirt on, keeping the top the same. 

You chuckled lightly, “Why’s that surprising? Did you not think he was the marriage type of person?” you looked at her skirt, “I like that with maybe the button down you have on under, but the sweater is too much.” 

She nodded and took the sweater off, leaving the button down on, she began tucking it into the skirt, “I don’t know, he just seems so comfortable where we are, never thought he would talk about that so soon you know?” she looked at herself in the mirror after finishing the tucking, “You’re right, it was too much. Do you think heels would look good or flats?” she arched her foot up to give the illusion of wearing a heel. 

You adjusted in your seat, “I think heels help with the definition of the pencil skirt, flats would make it look too blah…” you smiled, “Wait, what do you mean so soon? You guys have been flirting longer than Joel and I have, hell, you guys are ahead in more ways than I think we are. Doesn’t shock me he’s brought it up.” 

She nodded and turned towards you, popping her hip out, “Yeah, I guess.” you bit her lip and grinned, “Have you and Joel had that talk yet?” 

You let out a small chuckle, “We’ve brushed over it a couple of times but I’ve always known Joel to eventually want to settle down, you know? It’s just something we’ve not needed to ‘talk’ about, you know?” you tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, looking down shyly, “It’s just something that I think he’ll ask one day and I’ll gladly say yes to.” you blushed and smiled down as you messed with the hem of your dress before clearing your throat and looking back at her, “But I don’t think that’s happening any time soon. I think he doesn’t want to ask too soon, he’s always worried about moving too fast, you know?” you softly chuckled, rolling your eyes jokingly.

Maria nodded and returned to the dressing room, smiling a little too widely to be around you, she spoke from behind the curtain, “Yeah. He does seem to worry about that.” she paused “But I think we can both agree, Joel seems a bit more domestic than Tommy.” she said, hearing you hum in agreement. 

She pulled her phone out and texted Joel: 

M: How’s it going so far? Still need her out til just after 4 pm?

J: Yes please, I’ll call when you can head here. 

She changed and came out in another skirt, this one lighter gray, and changed her blouse. 

“This color or the other one I tried?” she came to look in the mirror. 

You looked up from your phone and smiled softly, “I like this one with the other blouse and maybe a jacket?” 

She nodded, “Wanna go find me one while I try a few more things?” 

You stood and nodded, “Sure thing.” then walked to go find some jackets that would match. 

As you were browsing you couldn’t help but overhear a couple in the aisle over arguing, borderline fighting. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to. You said that I could pick out an outfit, so I did. I didn’t know that it wasn’t on sale, it was in the sale rack, so I just assumed…” she pleaded. 

You heard a man lower his tone and then a small yelp as he grabbed onto her arm tightly, “Oh you assumed? I don’t fucking care, put it back or I’ll make you and it won’t be very fun...” he threatened through clenched teeth. 

She nodded fearfully and he shoved her towards the rack, making her stumble over her feet. 

He scoffed, “You’re so fucking clumsy.” he mocked her like he hadn’t just shoved her almost into the damn rack.  

You zoned out for a moment, thinking back to about a year ago when a similar scenario happened between you and Charlie. 

2 years ago

The waitress had just left with your orders and you knew the second she left and his fake smile dropped you had done something wrong. 

“Did I say that you could order fries with your burger?” he leaned forward as he growled at you from across a booth. 

You bit the inside of your cheek, thinking then quickly responding, voice meek and quiet, “I’m sorry, she asked and you didn’t say no so I assumed it was ok…” You looked down to avoid eye contact, beginning to pick at your cuticle nervously. 

“You assumed? So I guess you’ll just assume that I’ll be paying extra for the fries? You assumed that too, right?” he bit out through clenched teeth, gripping the edge of the table. 

You felt people’s eyes on the two of you, watching as he dragged you through the mud with his tongue, begging for someone to say something, offer a hand, or help, but no one said a word. 

They left you in that booth to be torn apart by that monster. 

You swallowed, “I… Charlie, I’m sorry. I’ll have her send them back when she gets here.” you didn’t dare look up, too afraid to say or do anything more than keep apologizing. 

“No. It’s fine, you’re fat ass can have the damn fries. Shouldn’t have expected anything less from a pig.” he scoffed and leaned back, tracking a swig of the beer he had. 

You kept your head down, continuing to pick at your cuticle, leg bouncing up and down anxiously, trying to focus on the soft sound of the music playing overhead. 

About 10 minutes went by before she returned with your food, you looked up and put on a fake smile, “Excuse me, I’m so sorry, I misunderstood you when you asked if I wanted fries, could you please remove them from our bill and my order? I’m going to barely be able to finish the burger… let alone fries too.” 

She smiled and nodded, “Of course hun, just give me a sec to fix that for you.” she took your plate and walked away, coming back less than a minute later with just your burger. 

Your stomach growled at the absence of the fries. You would have really loved them in addition, as he had you on a hunger strike for the last 3 days, but you didn’t want Charlie paying for something he didn’t permit you to add onto the bill. You smiled softly and thanked her. 

She walked away and he scoffed looking at you, “You’re pathetic.” 

You kept your head down and ate the burger as quickly as you could, not only due to the hunger you were experiencing but if he had to wait for you so you both could leave, you don’t know what else would happen on top of the punishment you were most likely going to get due to the first incident. 

Before you could make it back out to the car after you both had finished he had smacked you across the face in the parking lot and shoved you up against the door of his truck, grabbing you with his hand by your jaw, “You ever pull that shit again and I’ll fucking kill you, do you understand?” 

You looked at him with eyes filled with nothing but fear, nodding quickly, “Yes… I understand.” tears started to form in your eyes. 

He let you go but didn’t get into the car until he backhanded you across the face again, leaving your cheeks red and stinging. 

You snapped out of it when you heard a small sound of a slap landing on her skin, which could only mean one thing with how he was speaking to her. 

You peeked over and saw her touch her cheek, tears falling as she felt the sting. He crowded her space, his fist balled, muttering “You’re such a fucking bitch…”

You knew if he wasn’t in public this would be a lot worse. 

That was all you needed. 

In times like these, when this had happened to you, you prayed someone would say or do something, offer to help you, stand up to Charlie. It meant more for someone else to say something than the person being abused, bystanders meant something. 

You made your way to the front of the store and cleared your throat for the attendant’s attention at the counter, “Hi, could you please put in a call to the police? I just witnessed a man hitting his girlfriend, threatening her, and she has other indicators of further abuse…” you spoke softly and calmly. 

The attendant nodded and pulled the phone out quickly, calling. You leaned against the counter to face the exit and texted Maria:

Y/N: Something came up, they don’t have any jackets here that’ll match, we can go somewhere else. I’m at the front when you’re ready.”

Maria came out a few minutes later and came up to you, “Hey, what’s going on?” 

You kept your eye on the couple and explained what you witnessed. She nodded and paid for her things before coming to stand by you. 

The cops showed up less than 5 minutes after that and came up to the store attendant, “We got a call about a domestic abuse and assault allegation?” 

You cleared your throat and stuck out your hand for him to shake, “Hi, I had the store call. I witnessed the altercation and would love to give you my statement.” you smiled softly. 

He nodded and shook your hand, then pulled out his notepad to gather information. 

While he gathered your statement the other officer went over to talk to the couple, he pulled the man aside and began questioning him separately. Instantly, the man was on the defense, making stupid excuses and lies.

You explained that you had witnessed him hit her and threaten her. You mentioned you were a domestic abuse survivor yourself and know the signs. You also noted to him that she had bruises on her arm which you knew meant this had been happening for some time, indicating that this is a pattern of behavior. 

The store attendant cleared her throat and noted that they found the altercation on the security cameras, further supporting your statement. 

He nodded and had the attendant send the evidence to his office via email then looked at you, clearing his throat, “Mind if we take down your contact information in case we need you in any court proceedings?” 

You shook your head, “Not at all, I’m happy to help.” you gave him your information then looked at him, confused, “Wait, you’re arresting him, it’s that easy?” 

He looked at you sadly, understanding you hadn’t had the same treatment done for you, “Here in Texas we take any form of abuse seriously, I’m sorry if you didn’t get the same treatment where you were, ma’am.” 

You nodded and chuckled, “That’s refreshing to know.” you teared up and looked down, “You have no idea how much relief that brings me to know this woman has a chance to get out.” 

The cop nodded and held out his hand, “We’ll call you if we need anything else, but you’re free to go. We’ll handle it from here.”

You looked up and shook his hand, thanking him.

He walked away and you let out a shaky breath, watching them cuff the guy and the girl looked relieved as she spoke to the officer that took your statement. 

Maria touched your arm softly, “Hey, you ok?” 

You nodded, “Yeah… I just… I don’t know why but it just hit me, I’ll never deal with that with Joel.” you had a few tears fall, “That part of my life is over… thank god...” you let out a small laugh. 

Maria smiled and squeezed your arm, “He loves you so much and for the time you were with Charlie, I’m sure Joel will make up tenfold.” 

You looked at her and nodded, chuckling as you wiped tears coming down your cheeks. 

You cleared your throat after a few moments of composing yourself, “Let’s go find you a suit jacket, yeah?”

She nodded and took your arm, “How does the thrift store down the street sound?” 

You perked up, “Now you’re speakin’ my language…”

–

She knew that taking you to the thrift store would not only be for her but you’d find things for yourself as well. If you knew any better you’d pick up on how she knew this would keep you busy which was her goal today with you. Keep you out of the house and away from Joel while he puts everything together. You spent more than an hour there, you found some suit jackets for Maria, all looked amazing on her. 

She also found some really cute belts to go with some of the outfits and some really cute bags as well. 

You found yourself a few outfits as well in case you had some interviews coming up, there were some very business options, and some more business causal options, but you found things that brought you such joy. 

You also snuck over and found Joel some nice shirts and even found him some cowboy boots in his size that you couldn’t help but grab. You couldn’t wait to get home and show him. Maybe he could wear them out tonight as they’d go great with the outfit he had on today. 

You left and went to another mall plaza across town as Maria had said she wanted to find some more options plus you both loved shopping, and you had time to do whatever you wanted as you saw it was only 2 pm. 

After a few more stores and hours of shopping, she found a few options for the interview and then some more for if she got the job. You were at the checkout when you saw the time, it was 5 minutes to 4 pm. 

‘Shit, we lost track of time.’

You pulled out your phone and sent a text to Joel:

Y/N: Hey cowboy, I’m going to be a little late getting home, lost track of time. We are just checking out and then should be home within the next 20 minutes. I love you. <3

There were those three dots shortly after as he was typing a response then a message popped up from him: 

J: No worries, sweetheart. Just take your time and get here safely. I love you too. 

You helped her carry all the bags to her car, packing them into the trunk and packing the back seat with the remaining.  

You were driving out of the parking lot when Maria’s phone started to ring from her purse, you pulled it out and saw it was Joel, “Do you want me to answer for you since you’re driving?” you asked looking over at her. 

She nodded, “Yeah, could you?” she looked to the left and then right to pull out of the lot.

You answered the call, putting it on speaker, “Hey sweetheart, we are about 15 minutes away, we just left the mall.” 

Joel smiled at you answering, everything was going to plan, and he chuckled, “Uh, yeah, about that... I went and ran a few errands with Tommy… and the truck broke down, can you and Maria come and grab us? A tow truck is coming to get the truck to take it to the shop. You and I will just grab a ride home from them to our plans?” 

Maria nodded and looked at you, mouthing ‘Where are they?’ 

“Oh shoot, yeah, we can. Where are you guys?” you asked with slight concern in your voice. 

He tsked his tongue, acting confused, “Uhm, stuck somewhere rural, we took a back road trying to avoid traffic. I’ll send Maria a pin of our location so she can put it into her phone, yeah?” 

You nodded and looked at Maria, she nodded. “Yeah, that works. We will just see you soon.” 

He smiled, nodding, “I’ll see you soon, mi vida. Drive safe, take your time, no rush.” 

You smiled and nodded, “We will. I love you.” you said softly. 

He softly answered back, “I love you too.” 

You hung up the phone and then pushed the address he had texted Maria, “Damn, 26 minutes away, what the hell were they doing?” you chuckled and handed the phone to her to help navigate the way. 

She chuckled and bit her cheek to stop herself from grinning, “I have no idea, guess we’ll find out soon enough…” and then turned right at the next light to head that way. 

Joel’s POV 

After you and Maria left, it was like a green light went off. Tommy and Sarah dropped what they were doing and ran into the garage. They got the supplies he had gathered and hid over the last few weeks, pulling them out of hiding.

He had gathered fancy pillows, nicer blankets, and fairy lights, as well as small candles to create an ambiance. 

Sarah ran upstairs and grabbed a box of photos and the other supplies she had hidden in her room that she and Joel made together over the last few days when you weren’t around, these three had a game plan, they were eager to execute. 

There were a few errands they still needed to run and do before they were to set up at the location. Joel had to run to a florist to get some flowers he had ordered and then also needed to run to the local diner you both loved to eat at when you’d go out to run errands or just for some good comfort food as he was also going to set up a picnic. 

Tommy packed everything into the truck and then came in, “We have everything?” he said slightly out of breath. 

Joel pulled out his phone and looked through the list he had made, checking things off as he went down, then nodded his head, “Ring and gift, then that’s it. I’ll meet ya’ll in the truck.” he put his phone in his pocket then ran upstairs while Tommy and Sarah went out to get into the truck. 

He got into the closet and pulled out a big box hiding behind a pile of clothes that he had wrapped in some brown kraft paper that had ‘Mi Amor’ addressed in pen on it, and wrapped with a nice deep green bow that Sarah had helped him tie. 

He then knelt and pulled the lockbox out from under the bed, entering in the combo of 0720, pulling out the ring box, smiling brightly as he opened it up once more to look at it and teared up. For a moment he stopped and was thinking about how you’re going to react to all of this, he couldn’t wait to make you his fiance and then wife. 

He locked the lockbox up and slid it back under the bed, then grabbed the box on the bed, put the ring box in his pocket, and headed down to the truck to join Tommy and Sarah. As he walked down the stairs he thought about how in this house, that bedroom, not too many years ago, he never would have thought a ring would be in his pocket and he would be proposing to the love of his life today. 

—

14 years ago

Sarah was no more than 6 months old, Joel had come back home from work after getting a call from Rachelle that he needed home, and that it was an emergency. 

He rushed through the front door, panicking as he ran upstairs, “Rachelle, what’s wrong? Where’s Sara-” he stopped seeing her packing her bags in the bedroom, moving back and forth from the closet and dresser to the suitcases on the bed. 

“I’m leaving. I can’t do this anymore Joel,” she said as he shoved some clothes into the duffle bag she had opened on the bed. 

Joel came over, “What do you mean? I… I don’t understand.” he started to walk back and forth with her. 

She stayed quiet, continuing to gather her things. 

Joel sighed, frustrated, “Will you stop and talk to me?” he moved in front of her, trying to get her attention. 

She maneuvered her way around him, “There’s nothing to talk about. I just needed you home so Sarah wasn’t alone.” she grabbed a bag from inside the closet that contained her sentimental items. 

“Wait- what do you mean? You… you can’t leave. You can’t leave Sarah… she needs you. I… I need you.” he followed her as she walked back from the closet to the bed. 

She scoffed, “Joel, Sarah will be fine. She takes formula and is at the age where she doesn’t need a mother…” She shook her head as she put the back in the suitcase, “...and I… I never wanted this life Joel… you did.” she rolled her eyes and chuckled coldly, “I didn’t want this but you did and I was convinced that I could make it work, that if I tried, I could do it, but I… I don’t want this. I do not want to be a mother, I had dreams.” she looked at him, eyes numb, “...I’m leaving to pursue them.” 

Joel looked at her and searched her eyes, “Rachelle… Sarah will need you all her life. She… we are a family. I love you, I’m sure what’s going on is somethin’ like postpartum depression, like what the doctor suggested. Please don’t do this…” he tried to take her hand but she pulled away from him and turned to walk down the hall to get some other things. 

Joel stood there for a second, his heart racing, mind feeling like it was moving a million miles a minute, he snapped out of it hearing Sarah cry in her crib. 

Rachelle walked past her nursey and sighed, sounding annoyed by the crying, “I… I can’t. Joel?” 

Joel walked into the nursery and picked up Sarah, cradling her softly, “Shh it’s ok baby girl. Daddy’s got you.” he softly rubbed her back. 

He held her close to him and rocked back and forth, humming softly as he watched Rachelle walk in and out of the bedroom, his heart slowly breaking. 

He knew Rachelle was struggling and that she was having a hard time bonding with Sarah, but he didn’t think this would ever happen. He did everything he could to help her, to support her. He worked extra jobs so that they could afford child care every other day, but working longer hours meant he wasn’t there as much when she did have Sarah by herself. It felt like he was stuck between a rock and a hard place. 

Sarah drifted back to sleep so he gently put her back in the crib and walked out, gently closing the door enough to leave a small crack. 

“What can I do or say to make you stay? I’ll do anything. Tell me, I’ll make it happen.” he said as he came into the bedroom. 

“Joel, you’re not hearing me. I’m not staying.” she closed her suitcase and started to zip it up. 

“Rachelle, you can’t leave…” he spoke softly, trying to stay calm, “Sarah needs a mom. She needs you. I thought we said we would figure this out, we would do this together… we made her that promise in that hospital bed, you remember?” he came up stood behind her, “Please…” he pleaded.

She took a breath and shook her head, tears falling, “Promises can be broken.” she turned around and looked at him, “Especially when it’s what’s best for everyone involved.” 

Joel shook his head and tears started to form, he went past frustrated to disbelief. Something snapped when she said that. 

He scoffed and jutted his jaw, “How is this best for everyone? You’re leavin’ us for your benefit!” he shouted, pointing at her. 

She nodded, “Yes. I am. I’ve made my peace with that.” she said emotionless. 

Joel took a breath and turned around, chuckling in anger, “I… is there someone else?”  

She remained quiet for a moment then sighed, “What if there is? It’s not like we are… married or anything… we are more like co-parents than partners since Sarah was born, Joel.” she said quietly, making any excuse she could come up with. 

Joel turned around and began chuckling coldly, blown away, feeling his anger brewing up, “Are you kidding me? How in your right mind do you figure that Rachelle?” he chuckled, “I… I’m sorry, but me fucking you almost every other night and us talking about potentially getting married the other week doesn’t say ‘co-parents’ to me!?” he began to raise his voice. 

She looked down, avoiding his eyes, “I… I’m sorry if you’re feeling confused.” 

Joel chuckled, “Confused? Confused doesn’t even begin to describe what I’m feelin’ right now!” he slapped his hands against the side of his legs in defeat and shook his head, “I… I don’t even know where all this is comin’ from. You never gave me any indication this wasn’t what you wanted! You said you were scared, but that’s what everyone says when they get pregnant by accident! Other than that, you’d never said anything, at least to me!?” he began processing things, concluding that no matter what he said or did, it was never good enough for her. Tears threatened to escape down his cheeks. 

She stood there, staring at the ground, feeling nothing about what he was saying, she was disconnected long before now. 

“What… what about your parents? Do they want anything to do with her if you leave because if you’re done, that’s it, you’re done, and they are too. I won’t subject Sarah to that life of half her family not loving her fully.” he said bluntly. “…you don’t get to show up one day and be the Disneyland mom that abandoned her kid and then comes to her senses years later and tries to be involved.” he pointed at her, narrowing his eyes, tears falling now, “You don’t get to abandon our daughter and then come back as nothing happened, that’s not fair to her.” he ground his teeth, anger festering.

Rachelle nodded and sighed like she was tired of the conversation, “That’s fair. I won’t come back.” she picked up her suitcase and duffle bag and began to walk out of the bedroom. 

Joel shook his head and began breathing heavily, then followed after her, “What do I tell her huh? One day, she’ll ask where her mom is, what do I tell her? Do I break her heart and tell her that mommy never wanted her? Tell her that mom packed her bags and left us?” he bit at her as she walked down the stairs in front of him. 

“You tell her whatever you think is best Joel, I really don’t care.” she shook her head, determined to get out of the door. 

Joel let out a breath, shocked by her response, and stopped walking, standing at the bottom of the stairs as she touched the front door knob, “So that’s it? Not even going to tell her goodbye?” 

She looked back at him and clenched her jaw, shaking her head, “Goodbyes are for when you’ll see the person again, goodbyes aren’t forever. This is forever. Like you said, if I walk out this door I’m done.” she looked back at the door and opened it, “I wish you nothing but the best Joel. For both you and Sarah.” she softly said before walking out the door and quietly closing it leaving Joel standing there, alone, confused and heartbroken. 

—

The house and his life had a warmth to it now, Rachelle left a coldness to it when she left, sucked all the life and joy out of him for a long time that night when she left. 

He barely recognized the person he was when she left them. Joel wished he could tell that young man at the bottom of the stairs, crying as he held his baby girl in his arms, feeling alone and abandoned, ‘Just wait, someone will come along to make you the happiest man alive.’ 

If there was one thing he would change about the relationship you two had, it would be that, for both of your sakes, you both met sooner. You wouldn’t have been with Charlie and he would have had more time with you. 

Maria had been sending him small updates over the next couple hours, letting him know how you were doing, what they were doing, just keeping him informed of the mood of the day as something everyone was concerned with was your mental health so close after Reggie’s funeral. To everyone’s surprise, you were doing better than expected, which is all they could ask for. 

They had run to the florist and got white roses and baby breath to decorate with and then ran to the diner about an hour before you were due to show up and got your meals from the restaurant, putting them in a cute wicker picnic basket Joel had found at a thrift store he went to with Sarah to gather things to decorate with knowing how much you loved the mall details and also loved little things that had character from the thrift stores. 

The three of them went to that lookout that Joel talked about in those messages when you were away at Delta 42. He told you that you’d look at the universe while he’d hold his. In his mind, there was no better place to propose to you. 

Joel parked by a tree that overlooked the city below and Tommy started to hang those fairy lights above. Sarah opened the tailgate and started helping Joel fix everything, laying out blankets and pillows to create a cozy space. 

Joel then hopped out of the truck's bed, and he and Sarah started lining up battery-operated tea lights and placing about a hundred around the truck on the ground. 

Sarah looked up at him, “How are you feeling?” she smiled softly. 

“I’m feeling a bit nervous, but like an excited nervous, you know?” he chuckled lightly. 

She nodded and chuckled with him, “I still can’t believe you’re asking her to marry you, it’s crazy that a year ago it was just you and me.” she looked down at the container she had and pulled out photos she had gathered of you and Joel, the three of you, and some of you and Sarah throughout the months, starting to wrap them around the tree as she had put them on a long string for this purpose. 

Joel nodded and clicked his tongue, “I never thought I’d ever get married, if I’m being honest. I don’t think Tommy or I ever thought we’d find anyone to take on our asses.” he softly laughed. 

Sarah chuckled, “I guess it took a special kind of girl for you both to find, right?” she anchored the photos and then stood up and looked back at her dad who was chuckling and nodding. 

She dusted her hands off and then looked around, the sun was starting to set and everything looked so beautiful. She could tell how much thought and effort Joel put into this and knew you’d feel so special by all of this, “It looks great Dad…” 

She came over and hugged him, “I’m so happy for you. I love you.” 

He hugged her back and kissed the top of her head, “I love you too baby girl. Thank you for all your help and support with this.” 

She smiled and then looked at the time, “Time to give Maria the call?” she winked. 

He chuckled and nodded, then pulled out his phone and dialed her number. 

You watched out the window as Maria drove, noticing that you had no idea where you were going. 

“Jeez, these two really went out to the middle of nowhere…” you chuckled. 

You began driving up a dirt path and became confused, looking around you, muttering under your breath, ‘What the hell…’ 

Maria continued to drive, keeping her eyes peeled out, and looked around as she drove. She approached the top of the hill and smiled as she saw Tommy and Sarah standing on the side of the road, they waved and smiled. 

She pulled off to the side and opened the door, getting out, you followed and looked around, “Hey… where’s Joel?” 

Sarah smiled and nodded up the road, “He’s just trying to fix something before the tow truck comes, he’s just up the path a little further.” 

You looked at them all and nodded, “I see. I’ll go check on him, and see if I can help.” you smiled softly and started making your way up the path. 

Tommy smiled and cleared his throat when you were far enough away not to hear, “Like a mouse falling for the cheese in a trap…” he chuckled. 

Maria and Sarah started to tear up as you kept walking. 

—

When you got the the top of the hill you saw the truck and Joel sitting on the edge of the bed, you giggled, “Joel?” you started to walk up to him, “What? What is all this?” 

He immediately jumped off the bed and started walking towards you, smiling brightly, “Surprise darlin’!” 

You chuckled and blushed, the amount of effort that went into all the details you could see was mind-blowing and made your heart race, butterflies erupting in your stomach. 

He met you a little more than halfway up the path, and pecked your lips lightly, taking your hand in his to lead you to the truck, “Come ‘ere…” 

You smiled as you followed him, wrapping your hand around his bicep as you walked with him, “I… I am so confused what’s the occasion?” 

He kept walking and when you two got to the truck and lifted you to sit on the edge of the bed by your waist, making you giggle softly, “Can’t I just surprise you with grand and elaborate things like this?” 

You looked down at him and gently took his face in your hands and leaned down, softly kissing him a few times before pulling back, “You can… it just… still knocks me out of orbit that you love me this much sometimes…” you blushed and gently caressed his cheek. 

He took a soft breath in and then hopped up to sit next to you, “Well, I do have one more surprise so get back into orbit…” he winked and chuckled. 

You smiled and looked at him, “What do you mean one more surprise?” 

He leaned back and pulled the box that was wrapped out from behind him, “This is for you, mi vida…” he looked at you lovingly. 

You gasped softly and bit your lip, trying to keep tears from falling, “Joel… what is this? What…” you shook your head, “Why?” 

He smiled softly, “The only ‘why’ there ever will be is because I love you…” he leaned over and gently kissed your cheek, “Now open it, baby…” 

You looked at him then at the box, then back up at him, “I… I just…” you chuckled, starting to tear the wrapping paper carefully, to reveal a box, you smiled, and opened the box which had a backpack in it and then a letter on top of it saying, “Open the backpack first then me <3…”

You set the letter to the side of you and looked at Joel, “What is this?” you pulled the backpack out of the box and gently put the box aside, then looked for the zipper. It looked like a backpack that opened somewhat like a suitcase so you laid it flat and opened it up to find a Nikon camera, multiple lenses, an SD card case, and a few other accessories, “Joel… I…” you shook your head, smiling widely, feeling overwhelmed by emotion, you teared up, “This cost a fortune baby… I…” 

He scooted closer to you and gently cupped your cheek, “Before you say anything else let me just say a few things…” he gently caressed your cheek, “You deserve this. I don’t want to hear how expensive it was or how you can’t repay me… this is me taking care and supporting you and your dreams.” he kissed your forehead then nose and chuckled and when you did, tears streaming down your face.

He continued, “I already booked you with Wendy, she’s contracted with you. She also has a few other friends who want to hire you.” he tucked a strand behind your ear, “I want you to do something that you love and you love taking photos, this…” he looked down at the bag, “This is the least I can do is help you get what you need to get started, my love.” 

You shook your head and chuckled, smiling widely, then leaned in and captured his lips in a deep and slow kiss, putting your hand on his chest softly. 

He kissed you a few times before gently pulling back and pecking your lips, you whispered, “Thank you…” you leaned your forehead against him, keeping your eyes closed. 

He leaned back in and kissed you once more, you could feel his heart pounding in his chest as your hand rested there. Yours was also pounding but for an entirely different reason, you smiled against his lips and then gasped excitedly, “Oh, the letter!” you giggled and turned around to grab the envelope, carefully opening it. 

You pulled out the letter and unfolded it, smiling softly at him and then at the paper as you began to read: 

Mi amor, 

I think that continuing to write each other letters is a great idea and would love to do it with you. I, too, miss the excitement and thrill of seeing an envelope from you. Sarah will tell you that on days that I didn’t hear from you for quite some time, and before we had Skype to talk to each other– I’d sit there every morning and watch for the mailman to come only just to run out to the mailbox the second he left to look for your letters. 

I was smitten with you so early on now that I look back on it. I think within the 2nd or 3rd letter, I had developed feelings for you. I wanted nothing more than to protect you, to take care of you. I couldn’t believe that you felt the same way when we finally admitted it– and here we are. 

I constantly think back to the first time I heard your voice when Tommy and Maria had Skyped each other that one time and you and Z came in giggling. I sat on that bed and fell head over fuckin’ heels in love with you the second I realized it was your voice. I have never felt so sure about someone in my life. After Rachelle– I kept my heart very guarded and under a lot of protection, never feeling that someone would come along and completely sweep me off my feet, I never believed in love after she left. 

But you swept me off my feet. You made me believe in love again. 

You instantly made everything brighter, made everything warmer, and feel more alive. I can’t thank you enough for what you’ve brought to our lives, and my heart. 

But–- I can try to make it up to you, make you as happy as you make me. I want to spend my life with you. I want to take care of you. I want to support you. I want to give you everything you’ve given me- peace, love, and happiness for the rest of our days. I've never known a peace like the one I have when I'm with you, mi vida. 

Not too long ago, I made you a promise that one day I’d marry you, and I’d like to make good on that promise today. 

With all my love,

(hopefully your fiance) Joel

You moved the letter down into your lap after reading the last sentence and found him on one knee in front of you. Instantly your eyes were misty with tears as they began to fall, softly letting out a chuckle. 

He smiled lovingly, his eyes clouded with tears and cheeks rosy, holding up a ring box, nervously letting out a shaky breath before softly speaking your name, “Will you marry me?” 

You put your fingers over your mouth as you begin to quietly giggle, met his eyes, nodding frantically, and let out a soft chuckle as tears continue to fall down your cheeks, speechless.

You put the letter to the side of you and quickly slid down and off the tailgate of the truck, meeting him on his knee, taking his face in yours gently, smiling and giggling, nodding again and whispering “Yes…” as you brought your lips to his in a searing passionate kiss. 

He chuckled against your lips and kissed you back, putting his hand on your cheek as well, pulling back after a few kisses, “Yes?” he smiled against your lips, clarifying. 

You chuckled, which turned into a giggle, “Yes! Yes, I’ll marry you.” you gently caressed his cheeks with your thumbs, looking into his eyes, you both smiling brightly. 

He gently took your left hand and pulled his gaze back, with shaking hands as he was so nervous and excited, took the ring out of the box and put it onto your ring finger, it fit perfectly. 

You looked down at your hand and saw the ring, “Joel this is… it’s beautiful.” you touched the ring with your other hand, fixing it to be straight. 

“It’s been in my family for a couple of generations… it only felt right to make you my wife with it.” he gently took your left and hand brought it to his lips, kissing it. 

Wife. His wife. That would be a thought and title you’d never tire of hearing him refer to you as. 

You blushed and looked at him as he held your hand against his lips, your smile growing, “I love you… I love you so much…” You touched his cheek gently with your left hand and brought your lips to his, slowly and deeply kissing him. 

He put his hands on your waist and slowly stood with you, wrapping his arm around you to pull you close, against him, continuing to kiss you deeply. 

After a few moments you pulled back to look at him but then looked past his shoulder, something catching your attention, seeing someone in the distance with what you think is a camera, you chuckled nervously, “Honey, who’s that?”

Joel looked behind him and smiled then waved his hand over, beckoning them to come to you guys, “I hired someone to capture this moment for you…” he looked at you then a young man came jogging up. 

“Congratulations!” he smiled brightly, shaking Joel’s hand. 

You looked at Joel and teared up, “You thought about that too?” you smiled softly.

He looked at you and then shyly to the ground, “I wanted this to be perfect… the smallest details mattered and I know how much you love having things like this documented.” he then looked up at you and kissed your temple. 

The young man smiled and cleared his throat softly, “My name is Eddie, it’s so lovely to meet you. I’ve heard so many wonderful things about you.” he took your hand and shook it, smiling softly. “I was just wondering if I could take a few close-ups of the ring. And then if you want, I can gather some of you both?” 

You nodded hearing some of what he said, feeling completely overwhelmed. You chuckled, “Sorry, I’m still in shock. You just tell me where to be and what to do.” 

He nodded and let out a light laugh, then captured some photos of the ring, some with Joel’s hand holding yours, some with your hand on his chest, and some back in the ring box. 

While he was taking some photos of the truck and scene, you stepped away somewhat with Joel, completely in your own little world, you looked up at him, still in his arms, “I can’t believe all of this, I… I don’t even think I’ve seen half of the details quite yet. How… how long have you been planning this?” you combed his hair back softly. 

He held you close by wrapping his arm around your waist and having his other hand splayed against your hip, rubbing it softly, “Officially… I got the ring at the beginning of the month but I’ve been putting the plan together since we got home from that dinner we went to.” he rubbed his nose against yours softly. 

You smiled and looked up into his eyes, blushing, biting your bottom lip, “You’re going to be my husband…” 

He chuckled softly and nodded before whispering, “And you’re going to be my wife…” then capturing your lips gently and kissing you deeply, beginning to tangle his tongue with yours. 

Eddie turned around and captured some photos of you two talking then a few of you kissing each other. He cleared his throat softly, making you and Joel shyly pull away. 

You hid your face by hiding in his shoulder. Joel chuckled and looked at Eddie, who chuckled as well and came closer. 

 “Alright you two love birds, I’m going to leave you to enjoy the moment, I’ll get you these photos within the week.” he put his lens cap on the camera. 

You turned around and smiled, “Thank you so much, you have no idea how much this means to me to have this captured. I’m so excited to see your work.” you moved forward and hugged him softly. 

He smiled and hugged you back, then pulled back and chuckled, “Congrats again. Can’t wait to see the wedding.” he winked.

You went back and settled against Joel as he pulled you in by wrapping his arms around you from behind and kissing your shoulder softly, you blushed, “We can’t either.” 

He smiled and nodded, “Ya’ll have a good night.” he began walking down the hill where you had come from. 

You smiled and looked at the truck then saw the photos wrapped around the tree and unwrapped yourself from his arms, walking up to take a closer look, studying each one, smiling at all the memories captured. 

Joel smiled watching you before he got into the bed of the truck, and opened up the picnic basket, “You hungry sweetheart?” 

You turned around and bit your lip, hiding your grin, “Starving!” you got up into the bed of the truck and sat next to him, putting the blanket he was under, over your lap as well. 

He pulled out the food he had ordered, “Thought the occasion called for something old fashioned and reliable.” he handed you a styrofoam box and then opened his as he opened yours, both had your favorite sandwiches and salads from the diner called ‘Franny’s’. 

You hummed and kissed his cheek, “Exactly what I was craving… thank you, cowboy.”

He nodded and leaned over, kissing your temple. 

You two began eating in silence for a few minutes, then you covered your mouth as you chewed, “You said this ring was in your family… how many generations does it go back?” you then leaned your head against his shoulder and looked at the ring sparkle as the fairy lights above you hit it. 

Joel ate the last bite of his sandwich before he nodded, “It goes back 3 generations, we will be the 4th.” 

You smiled, “Does this mean one of our kids gets it when they grow up? Sarah’s partner for her?”

He chuckled and shook his head, “No one gets it unless you want to give it up or I replace it.” he softly took your hand in his and tangled your fingers with his. 

You nodded and stayed silent for a moment, then giggled, “Oh shoot, this means you beat Tommy to it!” 

He joined you in chuckling and nodded, “Indeed I did…” 

You smiled softly and put your food aside then wrapped your around his bicep as he continued to eat, “You know, what’s funny is Maria and I just talked about the concept of marriage with you two today while she was trying outfits on.” you rubbed your thumb absentmindedly against his arm, looking at the view of the city slowly starting to light up as the sunset. 

“Yeah? Tommy’s talkin’ about marriage?” he hummed as he took a bite of his salad. 

You nodded and smiled, “Maybe we’ll have a double wedding…” you teased. 

Joel shook his head and chuckled, “We are not having a double wedding, my love. You’re havin’ your own damn day...” he leaned over and kissed your head. 

You smiled and blushed, nodding, “Understood.” 

“Big or small wedding?” Joel said after a few moments of silence. 

You hummed, “Define big?” 

He chuckled and leaned you both back, laying against the pillows as it started to get darker, “I think like everyone at the barbeque is big…” 

You nodded, “Big then. I want every one of those people there.” you smiled and let his arm wrap around you, moving your head to lay on his chest, hearing his heart beat at a steady rhythm. 

“What about you, what would you like?” you said softly. 

“I want a big one, everyone there that’s supported us.” he kissed the top of your head, “That or we elope with just the two of us, two witnesses and Sarah… no in-between.” he chuckled. 

You giggled, “Elope?” you moved your head to look up at him, “Goodness, you just put a ring on my finger, slow down Romeo…” you joked. 

He looked down at you and licked his lips as he looked at yours, then moved slightly, enough to move so he had access to your lips, “Can’t blame me for wanting you to be my wife sooner than later, can you?” he leaned in and captured your lips in a slow deep kiss. 

You blushed and cupped his cheek, kissing him back, gently pulling back, “No, I can’t.” you bit your lip, “I like being called your wife, has a nice ring to it.” 

He smirked and gently nudged your nose with his, “Yeah? Mrs. Miller, my wife, has a nice ring to it?” he hovered over your lips, teasing you. 

You blushed a deep shade of red and nodded, humming, “Just like calling you my husband has the same sweet ring to it.” you reached up for his lips, only for him to pull back and look down at you with eyes dark and full of lust. 

“Call me that again…” he looked at your lips, hungry. 

You grinned and took your hand that was cupping his cheek and ran it slowly down his chest, then pulled his belt loops gently, teasing him back in any way you could, you took your time and said sultry and slowly, “My husband…” 

He growled and leaned down, capturing your lips in his, kissing you deeply and slowly, both of you started to breathe heavily and excitedly. He trailed his hand down your body and brought your dress up your thighs, moving down to kiss your neck and shoulder, “Can you take this dress off for me baby?” he said against your skin, lightly biting the skin on your collarbone. 

You gasped and let out a soft moan before nodding and sitting up a little, pulling the bow that kept the top part tight and then sliding the straps off your shoulder, looking at Joel as you did this, biting your lip shyly, “Can I have my fiance help me with this part?” 

Joel sat up and kissed your shoulder as he gently put his fingers on the straps and pulled them down your body. You wore no bra so your nipples instantly perked from the chill in the air that surrounded you now. 

He continued to push it down your chest and torso, getting to your hips, he pulled his lips from your skin and looked up into your eyes, “Lay back, mi vida…” he said breathlessly.

You slowly lay down on your back and arched your back a little to accentuate your breasts when he had you lift your hips to take your dress off fully, blushing, leaning up onto your elbows, “Your turn…” 

Joel bit his lip and stared at yours as he unbuttoned his shirt and took it off, “God you’re so beautiful…” he couldn’t help but get in between your legs and connect his lips to yours in a hurried heated kiss, pushing you to lay flat on your back. 

Your hands moved to his belt as you kissed him, tangling your tongue with his as he brought his hand up to cup your cheek, to bring you closer.

He moved his lips to your jaw and then neck as your fingers pulled at his belt buckle, eventually working that to open and then unbuttoning and zipping his jeans and eagerly tugging his pants and boxers down his ass and midway down his thighs, gasping as you felt his length press up against your core, which he realized was bare, no panties, which he would have remembered if he took any off, he pulled back and kissed up your jaw, “Dime mi vida, ¿me estoy volviendo loca o no usaste bragas hoy?” (Tell me mi vida, am I going crazy or did you not wear any panties today?) he said with a strained, horse voice. 

You smirked and leaned up, kissing him once slowly and deeply then sucking on his bottom lip and pulling it as you disconnected and laid back down against the pillow and kissed his chest, trailing kisses up his neck, “No te estás volviendo loco, mi amor…” (You’re not going crazy)

He let out a deep groan and his eyes rolled back as he smirked, letting out a deep chuckle, “Mmm, you’ll be the death of me with how naughty you are, querida…” he began to grind himself through your folds, holding himself steady in between your bodies. 

You carded your fingers through the thick locks of his hair and held him against your skin as he began sucking love bites into your chest. 

After spending sufficient time marking what was his he pulled back and looked up at you, “Come ‘ere…” he leaned down and captured your lips with his, kissing you deeply and with much love and passion. He kicked his boots off of his feet and discarded his pants as well, before he lined himself at your entrance and went to push in when he pulled back, making you moan softly. 

He grinned against your lips, making you move your lips to kiss his jaw and neck, “Baby, please…” you begged, “I want you…” you gently started sucking love bites into his neck, near his pulse point, grinding your hips down to try and slip him into you with how he was perched at your entrance. 

He grunted once you started marking his neck, “Oh f-fuck…” his skin prickled with goosebumps at the sensation of your lips against his neck. 

He swallowed and gave in, slowly burying himself deep into you, making you inhale sharply, moaning, “Joel…” gripping onto his shoulder and hair, “Fuck you’re deep…” 

He stopped when he was fully in and cupped your cheek, “Eyes on me…” he panted, “Keep your eyes on me mi vida…” he put his forehead gently against yours and gripped hips gently, beginning to thrust himself in and out of you, slowly, softly grunting and groaning. 

You smiled and moaned, softly confessing, “The second you and I are married…” you gasped at a change of angle as he opened up your pelvis by putting his hand under your knee and pushing it up, cursing under your breath, lip quivering at the burst of pleasure you were feeling from this angle. 

He grinned, “Keep going, the second we’re married, what do you want my love?” he cooed as he started to slowly sped up his pace, grunting through clenched teeth. 

You panted and chuckled, “F-fuck… I…” your mind began to feel like mush as he was beating against that soft spot deep within, you began to talk in gibberish, feeling the warmth of your release starting to gather deep in your core. 

He leaned down and kissed your pulse point, “Tell me baby… talk to me…” he kissed your neck then softly nibbled on your earlobe before saying lowly, “What can I give you when I’m your husband?” 

You gripped his shoulder and held onto his hair, tugging gently as that built your climax up quickly, you arched your back and panted quickly, “Oh fuck, oh fuck… don’t stop…” you pleaded, biting your lip, whimpering. 

He gently nibbled your jawline and growled, “Mmm fuck… that’s a good girl, cum on my cock…” he felt you begin to tighten around him, he gripped onto your leg tighter to hold you there, and took his other hand, gliding it up your body to grip your nipple between his thumb and finger and gently pulling towards him. 

The coil deep within snapped and your head went back as your body arched off the bed of the truck, moaning loudly as you came around his cock, pussy pulsing and clenching as waves crashed down over you. 

Joel grinned and praised you, “That’s a good girl, you feel so good when you cum around my cock…” he kissed your chin and throat when your head was back, trailing his nose down your chest before taking one of your nipples between his lips and sucking it gently. 

You panted, chest heaving up and down as you came down from your high, combing your fingers through his hair, mumbling, “God you’re so good to me, taking care of me…” you closed your eyes and swallowed, feeling like you were floating as your orgasm settled down. 

Joel pulled away from your breast with a pop and came to meet your lips, kissing you deeply and slowly, keeping a slow but deep rhythm of his cock inside you, humming as he pulled back after a few moments of devouring your lips, “Can you tell me now what you want, mi amor?” he kissed your chin gently, panting as he started to speed up his movements. 

You looked at him and cupped his cheek, pulling him to kiss your lips in a searing passionate kiss before barely pulling back and whispering against his lips, “Quiero que me pongas un bebe…” (I want you to put a baby in me) you panted against his lips, moaning as he kissed your cervix with a deep thrust he did in response to your confession. 

He grinned against your lips, “No me tientes (Don’t tempt me), my love, I’ll do it tonight if you want it that bad.” he grunted and began to speed up his hips into your core, gripping onto your hip and leg tightly. 

You moaned as he continued to crash into you, continuing to kiss that spot and your cervix over and over, inhaling sharply, eyes rolling back in pleasure, “Don’t stop, god please… f-fuck!” you cried out in sweet pleasure, starting to grind your hips against his to create more friction in an attempt to break that coil that kept teasing you like it was going to snap. 

He grunted and he moved his hand to press against the back window of the truck to steady himself over you, “Fuck baby, fuck…” he panted, sweat lightly coating his skin as he groaned in pleasure feeling you suck him deep into your core, “God… fuck…” his eyebrows furrowed. He shut his eyes for a moment, feeling that deep pull behind his navel, before opening his eyes and smiling down at you, moving his hand off the truck and cupping your cheek, “Fuck I love you, I can’t wait to marry you… see you walkin’ down that aisle in a gorgeous dress…” he groaned feeling a warmth start to move up his spine, “I can’t wait to vow my life to you… to take care of you for the rest of our days…” he panted. His hips became erratic as he softly whispered weakly as he laid his forehead against yours, “No puedo esperar a ser tu marido y tú, mi esposa.” (I can't wait to be your husband and you, my wife.)

You leaned up and whispered, “Come for me, my love.” then reached up and kissed him deeply as he whimpered against your lips, cumming deep into you, hips stuttering, his knees giving out, chest heaving. 

He pulled back from your lips and cried out as you rocked your hips a little, milking him for everything he could give you, “F-fuck…” he leaned his head against your shoulder and chuckled softly, “God I love you…” he kissed your shoulder weakly and turned to kiss your neck. 

You softly giggled and traced your fingers on his back, tracing love letters into his skin with your fingertips as he lay against your body, humming softly. 

After a few moments, he slowly sat himself up and hissed as he took himself out of your warm core, and laid beside you, chest still heaving but slower, you leaned your head against his chest and looked up at the sky, the stars now visible and shining brightly. 

He looked up at the sky with you and after a few moments you both saw a shooting star shoot across the night sky, you gasped softly, giggling excitedly, “Quick- make a wish!” 

Joel pulled you closer in his arms and softly traced his thumb up and down your back, leaning his lips down to kiss your head, saying softly, “Don’t need a wish baby, I’ve got everything I could ever wish for right here…” 

Previous chapter - Next chapter

taglist:  @sarahhxx03, @blahkateisdone, @sunnytuliptime, @pedroscurls, @docharleythegeekqueen @pedritosgirl2000

[seitmai]

“What did she say?” Steve whispered to break the silence. “You heard what she said. Everyone heard it,” Sam whispered back, giving you a quizzical stare. “How many drinks have you had?” You held up a finger followed by another couple. “Like this many. And water. Hydration is so important.”

Hahah this just cracked me up 😂

“Yeah, I know. He’s hot. We all know he’s hot,” you shrugged. “And I said what I said.”

Period

You were careful not to be cruel if you disagreed with anyone, but you still led with honesty. Alcohol didn’t change that. So, if you said you thought Bucky was hot and you wanted him to fuck you raw, you meant it.

Honesty to a fault 🤷🏻‍♀️😅

“And you know he’s sitting next to you, right?” she asked. You downed the rest of your drink and shrugged again. “Yeah, I know. And I’d let him fuck me raw. Every day. Twice on Sundays,” you said unapologetically as Steve coughed. You swung your head toward Bucky with a sultry smile and leaned in a little closer. He smelled your perfume before you sat down tonight, but now the sweet smell combined with your natural scent was making him dizzy. “You’d fuck me raw, right? Maybe fuck me from behind so you can get nice and deep.”

No holding back hahah

Bucky heard Thor’s footsteps, but didn’t take his eyes off you as the God of Thunder took a seat. “Clearly, I’ve missed something.” “I said I want Bucky to fuck me raw,” you said without missing a beat. And your bluntness didn’t seem to bother the blonde. “I thought you two were already having relations. With how close you two-”

I love how unbothered and 0% of shocked Thor is 😂

“Is that not what they’re discussing?” Thor asked, taking a sip from his flask. “Though if there is no protection there is the risk of procreating, but they would have beautiful offspring.”

I can't 😂😂😂

“And if a breeding kink is what you’re into, actually breeding me or not, I’m all for it. I’m wet just thinking about it.” Thor laughed and held up his flask. “That’s the spirit.”

Thor is killing me 😂

Bucky’s cock twitched in his pants. “I know you’re wet. I can smell it,” he all but growled. He inhaled so deeply he could actually taste it, and he wanted more. And if he could smell it, Steve could smell it. "Okay then.” Clint removed his hearing aid. “I think I’m done.”

No Clint removing his hearing aid 😂

“Breed her well, Barnes. Make us proud!” Thor shouted. Steve hauled him from the room, too, with Clint hot on their tail.

I'm so sad, I loved Thor’s commentary 😅

“I hope I didn’t make you feel uncomfortable or weird. I’d never want that.” “That’s the last thing I feel,” he exhaled, still gripping your arms when you finally moved into his lap and straddled him. “Good,” you smiled, leaning in for a kiss.

Perfect 😌

“I want you more than I’ve ever wanted anyone in my life,” he admitted, brushing a tear away that fell. “But you’ve been drinking, and that means you can’t fully consent, and I will not take advantage of you, no matter how you say you want me or this. I respect and care for you too much for that.” HYDRA took consent away from Bucky for a long time, and it was one of the worst feelings in the world. He’d hate himself for doing anything with you without your full consent. He wouldn’t be the kind of man who did that. The man you deserved would be the one who properly took care of you in and out of bed.

He is just the best 🥰🥹

However you wanted your first time to be, he'd make it happen. He'd make love to you or fuck you or both. As long as there was clear consent and communication, he’d give you everything you needed and more, and he knew you'd do the same for him.

🥰🥰🥰

The smile you gave him repaired the cracks in his heart. “You’re a good guy, Bucky,” you said, snuggling against him. “And it isn’t just sex I want, but, well, I do want to have sex with you.” “You’re adorable,” he chuckled and rested his chin on your head. “And I know. It isn't just sex I want either.”

Ahh this was just the perfect mix of spicy, cute and hilarious 👏🏻

Love drunk Bucky! What about a drunk reader?

Yes, we've seen drunk!Bucky in Pretty Girl. A drunk reader could be fun.

Your Girl

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Summary: You're very vocal about wanting Bucky Barnes.

Word Count: Over 1.7k

Warnings: Drunk reader with no filter, drunk confession, dirty talk, humor, slight feels, talk of consent and communication, Bucky Barnes (he's a warning, okay?).

A/N: Hope you lovelies enjoy. ❤️ Not beta read and written on my phone, so any and all mistakes are my own. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!

“Raw. Next question.”

You sipped your drink, the room going eerily silent. It was the quietest it had been since everyone gathered in the lounge for some drinks hours ago. Pairs of eyes stared at you with a mix of fascination and shock as your words hung in the air.

Just moments ago, Clint had been going through his phone and showing everyone candid photos he managed to snap of everyone. Most of them were hilarious, but the most recent one wasn't hilarious at all. It was clearly hot based on your reaction.

“What did she say?” Steve whispered to break the silence.

“You heard what she said. Everyone heard it,” Sam whispered back, giving you a quizzical stare. “How many drinks have you had?”

You held up a finger followed by another couple. “Like this many. And water. Hydration is so important.”

“Hold on. Back to what you said a second ago.” Clint turned the phone toward him with a raised brow and slowly turned it back toward you so you could see it again. “You know that’s a picture of Barnes, right? Not some model or actor?” he asked.

Bucky Barnes, the beefy super soldier who was trying not to shatter the bottle in his metal hand as he watched the scene unfold before his eyes. Clint managed to snap a photo of him when he removed his shirt after a recent workout, which begged the question of why he was taking the photo to begin with. Bucky wasn’t looking at the camera since his eyes were shut, but his parted mouth, slightly messy hair, and sweat shining off his torso made him look like a thirst trap. The sweatpants only made the picture that much hotter.

“Yeah, I know. He’s hot. We all know he’s hot,” you shrugged. “And I said what I said.”

Bucky audibly exhaled. You had a penchant for being very honest with the team which they appreciated. If someone asked for your opinion or thoughts on something you didn’t hide how you felt. You were careful not to be cruel if you disagreed with anyone, but you still led with honesty. Alcohol didn’t change that.

So, if you said you thought Bucky was hot and you wanted him to fuck you raw, you meant it.

Clint exchanged a quick glance with Natasha before the redhead nodded to the spot beside you. The spy looked like she was having a hard time not smiling. “And you know he’s sitting next to you, right?” she asked.

You downed the rest of your drink and shrugged again. “Yeah, I know. And I’d let him fuck me raw. Every day. Twice on Sundays,” you said unapologetically as Steve coughed. You swung your head toward Bucky with a sultry smile and leaned in a little closer. He smelled your perfume before you sat down tonight, but now the sweet smell combined with your natural scent was making him dizzy. “You’d fuck me raw, right? Maybe fuck me from behind so you can get nice and deep.”

The bottle shattered which only made you smile more. Bucky’s nostrils flared and everyone backed up a few inches, except for you, the newest member of the team. The person who loved to leave little treats and snacks for him to make sure he ate throughout the day. The same person who made a show of bending over and stretching in front of him whenever you two worked out together. The only one who seemed to get a real smile out of him since you showed up like a shining beacon of happiness and sass.

And now you were telling him you want him to fuck you. Raw. He thought about it, of course- how wet and snug you’d feel around his bare cock, how you’d take him like a good girl. He pictured you sobbing his name and squirming as he pinned you down and brought you over the edge again and again. Licking his lips, he imagined the taste of your arousal on his tongue and wondered if he could make you squirt. He sure as hell wanted to try.

Bucky heard Thor’s footsteps, but didn’t take his eyes off you as the God of Thunder took a seat. “Clearly, I’ve missed something.”

“I said I want Bucky to fuck me raw,” you said without missing a beat.

Bucky bit back a groan. He was two seconds away from throwing you over his shoulder like a caveman and taking you away from everyone. There were so many filthy things he wanted to say and do to you…

And your bluntness didn’t seem to bother the blonde. “I thought you two were already having relations. With how close you two-”

“I’m sorry. Did you just say ‘relations’?” Clint asked. “Relations.”

“Is that not what they’re discussing?” Thor asked, taking a sip from his flask. “Though if there is no protection there is the risk of procreating, but they would have beautiful offspring.”

You leaned in a bit closer, but Bucky gripped your arms to move you away from his spot. “I don't want the glass to cut you.”

“You're so thoughtful. And amazing,” you smiled. He adored your smile. “And if a breeding kink is what you’re into, actually breeding me or not, I’m all for it. I’m wet just thinking about it.”

Thor laughed and held up his flask. “That’s the spirit.”

Bucky’s cock twitched in his pants. “I know you’re wet. I can smell it,” he all but growled. He inhaled so deeply he could actually taste it, and he wanted more. And if he could smell it, Steve could smell it.

“Okay then.” Clint removed his hearing aid. “I think I’m done.”

Steve jumped up when his best friend glared at him. “I think I’m done, too,” he said, not wanting to face Bucky’s wrath even though it wasn’t his fault he also had heightened senses.

“Let’s go, boys. I think these two should talk without us,” Natasha suggested, hauling Sam up by the arm and giving both of you a wink. “Be good, okay?”

“No promises,” you replied in a sing-song voice.

“Shouldn’t they get a room? I’m just saying,” Sam said as Natasha dragged him away.

“Breed her well, Barnes. Make us proud!” Thor shouted. Steve hauled him from the room, too, with Clint hot on their tail.

“Alone at last,” you giggled. If you were at all embarrassed, it didn’t show. And now that the two of you were alone, the tension skyrocketed. “You know, this isn't how I pictured saying any of this, but here we are.”

“Here we are,” he said. He couldn't believe you wanted him, but you did.

“I hope I didn’t make you feel uncomfortable or weird. I’d never want that.”

“That’s the last thing I feel,” he exhaled, still gripping your arms when you finally moved into his lap and straddled him.

“Good,” you smiled, leaning in for a kiss.

As much as he wanted to feel your lips against his, he stopped you. And as much as he wanted to tear your leggings away and have you then and there, but he couldn’t. “I’m not fucking you. Not tonight.”

The playfulness slipped from your eyes. So did the smile from your face. “Oh. I thought…” you breathed, looking away and quickly blinking. God, he hoped there weren’t tears in your eyes. “You don’t actually want me, do you?”

Bucky hadn’t meant for his words or stopping the kiss to come across as rejection, but that was exactly what happened. “That’s not–”

“Oh, my God. I ruined everything, didn't I? Why did I open my mouth?” You sniffled and tried to move away, but he wouldn't let you. “Six months of friendship and crushing on you and I-”

“Hey. You didn't ruin a thing.” Bucky gripped your chin with tenderness he didn’t think he was capable of anymore, and his heart broke when he saw the tears swimming in your beautiful eyes. “I want you more than I’ve ever wanted anyone in my life,” he admitted, brushing a tear away that fell. “But you’ve been drinking, and that means you can’t fully consent, and I will not take advantage of you, no matter how you say you want me or this. I respect and care for you too much for that.”

HYDRA took consent away from Bucky for a long time, and it was one of the worst feelings in the world. He’d hate himself for doing anything with you without your full consent. He wouldn’t be the kind of man who did that. The man you deserved would be the one who properly took care of you in and out of bed.

And he’d be the best man for you if you let him.

“So, you do want me?” you asked, your voice uncertain.

“I did say more than anyone else, and I meant it,” he replied. You had to believe him. “But our first time should happen when you're sober.”

However you wanted your first time to be, he'd make it happen. He'd make love to you or fuck you or both. As long as there was clear consent and communication, he’d give you everything you needed and more, and he knew you'd do the same for him.

The smile you gave him repaired the cracks in his heart. “You’re a good guy, Bucky,” you said, snuggling against him. “And it isn’t just sex I want, but, well, I do want to have sex with you.”

“You’re adorable,” he chuckled and rested his chin on your head. “And I know. It isn't just sex I want either.”

Bucky wanted to take you to bed, but he also wanted to take you out on dates. He wanted to make you laugh and smile, wipe your tears and comfort you when you cried, and be the one you confided in. He wanted to be your man, and he wanted you to be his best girl.

“I wanna be yours,” you sighed as if you read his mind, his heart skipping a beat. “Can I be your girl?”

“Yeah.” He closed his eyes when he kissed the top of your head. “You can be my girl.”

And tomorrow once you were sober, he’d officially ask you to be his girl.

Happy Moanday, lovelies! Love and thanks for reading! ❤️

Masterlist ⚓ Bucky Barnes Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi

[dawnbreaker-mylove]

Astra's Tool

Warnings: Implication of rape, child abuse, domestic violence, stalking (implied), power imbalance.

A/N: So... I wrote this... Before we start, I want to emphasize that this is fanfiction. I know this isn't canon, I'm not telling you to recognize it as canon. I wanted to write down my headcanon on Astra and Zayne and whatever relations they have. Don't ask me where I thought Zayne had a step-dad because I forgor. It was probably some Mandela effect or I read a headcanon on Dawnbreaker killing him somewhere back when I started playing the game. Reader's discretion is advised.

You asked Zayne where those marks on his arms came from. He would dodge the question every time with a joke or he'd change the subject. You decided not to pry too much, but your curiosity was never one to fade with time.

Today, you asked again.

“I've been meaning to ask. What happened to your arms? Were you just clumsy when we were kids or something?”

Zayne chuckled as his fingers trailed along the stacks or chocolate bars as you walked through the aisles of the grocery. “It could be that,” he picks up a bar of chocolate with raisins and nuts before placing it back, “but let's not think of things from the past. Instead, why don't you help me pick between almond or hazelnut chocolate for tonight, hm?”

He smiled, lighthearted and sweet like he always does. However, there's a glint of something in his eyes, just for a split second, before it disappears.

You were never one to pry. You both were dating for a while now but you both have your secrets. You respected that, of course. But this particular secret of his felt too important to simply forget. Like it was something you had to know.

Your gaze flickers towards the fridge. The metal doors were covered in colorful magnets from around the world, gifts from Zayne's parents. Then it hit you. If Zayne won't tell you, someone who knows him for years would answer your question.

His mother.

That evening, you called her. Once she picked up, her voice was as bubbly and warm as ever. “Hello, sweetheart,” she greets over some sitcom playing in the background. “What made you call? Is everything alright?”

“Everything is fine, Auntie,” you replied. “I just wanted to ask something.” The woman in the other line was encouraging, eager to sate your curiosity. The moment you mentioned Zayne's scars on his arms, the laughter faded. Followed by a sound you least expected. A muffled sob.

“I should've taken him away,” her voice trembled. “He… it was my fault.”

Through her sobs, the past unraveled before you.

Years ago…

We all know one thing for certain: gods have a way of taking what they want. Mortals were no exception. To deities, mortals were nothing more than a piece of a chessboard, their purpose moved by the divine. Astra was no different.

Like a flower blooming in the snow, Astra sees her. The doctor, a woman of beauty and grace, eyes dark and intelligent. He intended to make her his.

For a year, the god watched from the heavens, studying the doctor. He learns she was soft-hearted, the type to reach out to the lonely or to engage with helpless strangers. It was easy to take on a mortal guise, to be the kind of man she could fall for. And she did.

The doctor thought she had met the love of her life. The god thought he had won.

Another year passed, and she was happy. Until one December night, when the snow fell heavily on the city, Astra revealed what he truly wanted.

She tried fighting, but a mortal can never stand a chance against a god. He pinned her down, a cruel smile played on his lips as he whispered to her that the child she would bear would be the greatest gift of all.

She could never forget the look in his eyes that night. It glimmered but not with love or devotion, but with possession.

On the fifth of September, the doctor gave birth to a boy. His father held him in his divine hands, looking down at the baby with his cold gaze. The god named him Zayne.

The doctor wanted to believe, even just a little, that Astra might love the boy. That Zayne could be raised in warmth, not under the god’s watchful eye. But it was when he turned three, the ice came.

The child’s Evol manifested early, and Astra had waited for so long for that day to come. Training had to begin immediately. Every failure was met with punishment. Anytime Zayne's control faltered, Astra would take his wrists and let the ice spread over his arms and let it pierce through his skin like glass.

The doctor would hear Zayne’s cries echo through their home, but there was nothing she could do. Astra's word was law. A mortal could never go against a god.

Until the night she ran.

Zayne was four when his mother carried him in her arms and fled from the clutches of their abuser. But she was unsure if Astra would come for them. She didn't know if he could be outrun.

But she ran anyway. As far as they possibly could.

They built a new life in another city. An apartment for two, a quiet existence. But Astra never truly left.

Nightmares would haunt the young boy. Visions of a faceless man watching from the darkness. He would whisper to Zayne in his sleep. Followed by the ice. He would wake up, screaming in pain as the ice, sharp and jagged, pierce through his skin as they emerged again and again. His mother would hold him as the night filled with his screams of anguish, whispering soothing words and assurance she only half-believed.

The doctor thought she could never give Zayne a normal life. That was before she met the surgeon.

A cardiac surgeon visiting her hospital, tall and lean. She told herself she would never let anyone in again, she would never risk her life and Zayne's again, but then the boy met him.

Zayne, who rarely smiled or laughed, beamed when the surgeon scooped him up into his arms. The two would play and eat mints on a bench in the park. Watching all this, the doctor cried. But they were not sad tears. Tears of relief, of joy, streamed down her cheeks.

It wasn't long before they married. The surgeon gave Zayne his last name: Li. He did it without a second thought, without asking anything in return. Zayne finally has someone he can truly call his father.

Present day…

The call ended and you were left stunned. Your hands trembled as you curled into a ball on the couch. Zayne found you like that.

Without a word, he sat beside you and rested his hand on your back. His warmth was comforting but your chest still felt tight. Your eyes, swollen, flickered to his arms

“I'm sorry,” you whispered. Zayne frowns, lifting your chin up between his thumb and index finger. “For what?”

“For snooping around. For everything.”

You explained in between sobs. The things his mother told you. The things he never found the courage to tell you. Zayne's jaw slightly clenched, his fingers tensed, but his smile didn't waver.

“Enough with the tears,” he whispers as he strokes your hair. “That's all in the past.”

You look up at him, baffled. “You can't just forget something like that.”

His smile faltered slightly. Zayne shook his head and cupped your cheeks gently, wiping the tears from your cheeks before kissing your eyelids.

“What's in the past should stay in the past. I'm fine now, aren't I?”

You sniffled, wiping your nose with the back of your hand. “Why are you comforting me?” You grumbled. “I should be the one comforting you.”

A soft laugh escapes from Zayne's lips, brushing a stray lock from your face before lightly tapping your nose. “For starters, it's because I never heard of someone crying while trying to comfort the person who isn't.”

His voice was too light. Like if he acknowledged it—truly acknowledged it—he might break.

Now you were unsure of who he was comforting, you or himself.

You wrapped your arms around him, holding Zayne closed as humanly possible. You were scared to let go or loosen your grip, as if he would disappear if you did. Zayne only hugs back just as tight, kissing your hair then burying his face in the crook of your neck.

Above the clouds, beyond the falling snow, He watched.

Astra sat on his mighty throne, his gaze locked on the boy. His face that was often twisted in anger, was unreadable.

He had seen this play out before. His Foreseer, falling in love once again with the same mortal that proved to be his downfall in the past. He will not let it happen again.

He would wait. Time was irrelevant to a god.

In the end, what's his will always return to him.

[eyeknowyouno]

My submission for @bucktommywinterfest

Prompt: Painted nails/Uncle Tommy - Rated: G - Word Count: 1.2k

As soon as Buck opened the door, a squeal was heard, loud and giggly, an outpouring of adorable, sweet affection, quickly followed up by a very happy, "Uncle Buck!"

"There's my girl!" Buck responded, lifting the tiny bundle of energy up into the air before settling her on his hip. "Ready to have some fun?"

"Yep!" Jee said, wrapping her arms as tight as possible around Buck's neck.

Chimney, all but forgotten, cleared his throat before he handed over the duffle bag that was clearly bursting at the seams, full of everything Jee would need for an overnight in the loft. "Pretty sure that's her entire bedroom."

Buck grinned. "Good. It'll make things easier when I refuse to give her back "

"You'll be counting the minutes until morning by the third playthrough of Frozen. Trust me."

Buck stepped back, allowing his brother-in-law to come inside. "Maddie in the car?"

Chim nodded. "Her feet are swollen, and she didn't want to tackle your stairs. The second pregnancy is not fun, apparently." He leaned against the kitchen island. "Where's Tommy?"

Buck nodded towards the ingredients laid out across his table. "He ran out to get a few things I forgot to pick up earlier. Should be back soon." He carefully placed Jee down into one of the chairs so she could grab a handful of shredded cheese. "We're making personal pizzas and then cookies!"

Chim nodded. "Nice." He bent down to be eye level with his daughter. "Have fun and only annoy your Uncle Buck a tiny little bit, okay?"

"Go, Daddy!" She ordered, waving him away with one hand as the other grabbed a fistful of m&ms.

He chuckled at her feistiness, gave her a kiss on top of her head, and left to go have a nice date night with his very beautiful, very pregnant wife.

-----

To say that Tommy wasn't nervous for this night would be... well, it was fucking lie through and through.

He, Tommy Kinard, army vet, firefighter pilot of the LAFD was absolutely terrified of the little girl who currently occupied her uncle's lap as she threw clumps of cheese onto her personal pizza before they tossed it in the oven.

She was the tiniest person in Buck's life, and somehow, her opinion of him seemed like the most important opinion of all. Her small frame was literally made up of both Buck's flesh and blood along with the 118. She represented everything that was precious to Evan Buckley.

Tommy cleared his throat, closing the door behind him as he sat the bag of items that he had volunteered to go get for Evan on the counter. "I think I got everything."

"Who are you?"

He glanced up at Evan, nerves shoving him into some horrendous state of overthinking. He saw Evan nod encouragingly at him, and it helped him relax enough to sit down in the opposite chair and stick out his hand to her. "Tommy Kinard, and who are you?"

"I'm Jee-Yun." She wiped her hands on her jean overalls and shook the tips of Tommy's fingers. "I'm almost four!"

"Yeah? Well, I'm almost forty."

She giggled at that and then turned back to her pizza, using the pepperoni to make a smiley face. "When I'm done, we can watch Frozen." She stated to the entire room.

Evan's eyes were bright and happy as he grinned at Tommy above her little head. "Sounds great, Jee."

----

Tommy learned very quickly that watching a movie with Jee was an experience like no other.

She had to assign seats, which wasn't horrible because all she did was sit snuggled up between Tommy and Buck. But she also needed her juice boxes along with popcorn (while her pizza cooled) and her pink princess unicorn cat fluffy blanket.

But as Tommy watched the movie, Jee would also occasionally watch 𝘩𝘪𝘮, making sure he was reacting appropriately to the actions taking place on the screen.

Apparently, every scene that involved the sisters in the movie required dramatic gasps and 'oh wows' with the occasional 'what?!' thrown in for good measure. As for the reindeer and the snowman, they required laughs at everything they did. No excuses.

But his favorite parts of the movie had to be the musical numbers.

Jee would get up and stand in front of the television while she sang and danced along with the characters. Her innocence and pure joy from a silly song about a snowman wanting to experience summer for the first time was something Tommy never knew he needed in his life but he knew he'd be forever grateful to be here in this moment and witness it.

As the credits played on the screen, Tommy got up and began collecting their plates and bowls and crushed up juice boxes. He threw the trash away and placed the rest in the sink, all the while listening to Jee ask Evan what his favorite parts of the film were.

Before he knew it, a tiny hand was yanking on his pants. "Well? What did you like?"

Tommy rinsed out the last bowl, placing it in the dish rack before answering. "The songs. Definitely."

She scoffed and looked up at him. "Yeah, no, duuuh! But what one is the best?"

Evan picked her up. "Jee, maybe Tommy liked all the songs."

She tilted her head at Tommy. "Is that true?"

Tommy nodded. "Your uncle's right. I liked them all."

She squinted her eyes at him as if she had the ability to peer deep down inside his soul until finally she grinned and gave a quick nod. "Me too!"

-----

Jee demanded that the movie play again in the background while the three of them made cookies and played candy land. Tommy found himself wanting the night to last just a little bit longer. He already knew he loved spending time with Evan and his family but watching the connection he had with Jee... it made his heart swell and he longed for more nights just like this filled with Disney songs and laughter and silly games.

When the oven timer went off, signaling the cookies were finished baking, Jee stood up in her chair and loudly announced that they would all have makeovers while the cookies cooled.

Evan looked exhausted by this news. "Why don't we just watch another movie, Jee? Last time we played makeover, I had glitter in my hair for almost a week."

Jee crossed her arms and pouted. "But you looked prettiful!"

Tommy chuckled at that. "I'm sure you looked 𝘴𝘶𝘱𝘦𝘳 prettiful with glitter in your hair, Uncle Buck." He winked. "I'd love to see it."

Evan groaned and dramatically dropped his head on the table, to which Jee was unimpressed.

"Fine! If you don't 'preciate my glitter, then you won't be able to go to my tea party." She huffed in annoyance when she didn't get a reaction from him and quickly climbed down from her chair.

"Come on, Uncle Tommy!" She grabbed his hand and pulled him towards the living room. "I have all the nail polish you could want!"

Evan looked up suddenly at her use of 'Uncle Tommy' and smirked at the happy tears threatening to fall from Tommy's eyes. "Okay, fine. You win." Evan said, "If Uncle Tommy is doing it, I guess I'll do it too."

[lavb-b]

Fishing

+Princess goes snorkeling

…it was based on a true story…

+other old doodles

[heymacy]

IAN GALLAGHER + his journey with bipolar disorder

╰┈➤ “At times, being bipolar can be an all-consuming challenge, requiring a lot of stamina and even more courage, so if you’re living with this illness and functioning at all, it’s something to be proud of, not ashamed of." - Carrie Fisher

[gingermintpepper]

One of my biggest pet peeves is the assumption that something has to be sad for it to be tragic.

I've always been a big believer of the 'Apollo has an awful love life'/'Apollo is plain unlucky with love' line of thinking but it does bother me that the general reasoning for that statement is given to the concept of 'Apollo is somehow undesireable and thus rejected' (Cassandra/Daphne/Marpessa) or 'his lovers die young and thus their love is unfulfilled' (Cyparissus/Hyacinthus/Coronis). I personally think that's a very unfortunate way of looking at things - not only because it neglects the many perfectly cordial entanglements and affairs Apollo has had, both mortal and divine - but because it presents a very shallow interpretation of the concepts of love and loss and how loss affects people.

Apollo can still grieve lovers that have a long, healthy life. The inherent tragedy of an immortal who knows his lovers and children will die and cannot stop it does not stop being tragic simply because those lovers and children live long, fulfilled lives. The inherent tragedy of loss does not stop being tragic simply because someone knows better than to mourn something that was always going to end.

What is tragic is not that Apollo loves and loses but that loss itself follows him. Apollo does not love with the distance of an immortal, he does not have affairs and then leaves never to listen to their prayers again. He does not have offspring and then abandon them to their trials only to appear when it is time to lead them to their destinies. He raises his young, he protects the mothers of his children, he blesses the households that have his favour and multiplies their flocks that they may never go hungry. He educates his sons, he adorns his daughters and even in wrath he is quick to come to his senses and regret the punishments he doles out.

Apollo loves. And like mortals, there will always be some part of him that wishes to protect the objects of his affections. Apollo, however, is also an emissary of Fate. He knows that the fate of all mortal things is death. He knows that to love a mortal is to accept that eventually he will have to bury them. There is no illusion of forever, there is no fantasy where he fights against the nature of living things and shields his beloveds from death. Apollo loves and because of that love, he also accepts.

And that, while beautiful, is also tragic.

[oh-no-its-bird]

Yeah that sounds about right

Actually now I need Kaveh and Tsunade to interact solely so they can be blonde broke bitches together. I think Kaveh would be SO judgy about her gambling habits, it'd be funny

Blonde broke bitch alliance,,,

Ok actually yk what? I wanna see Kaveh accidentally kidnapping Naruto.

He's stuck in naruto land for some reason, but is kinda sticking to being on the road— looking for a way back home, or at least something hinting towards it. Uzushio sounds like a good place to investigate, with rumors of ancient seals and all that, so he's probably aiming for there.

And along the way yk, hes totally interested in the culture and architecture of this new strange land, so he's putting conscious effort into learning about things (and clans)

So he visits Kohona for a couple days, intending to hit the road soon after, and during his time there he finds Naruto and he's like struck by this sad poor little meow meow orphan and is like, "oh man you poor baby,,, come with me we can travel together on the road and I will take care of u,,"

And so Kaveh just kinda picks up Naruto, and Naruto is like, starry eyed and at the height of "I will imprint on anyone who so much as looks at me for longer than 5 seconds without disgust in their eyes" (let's say he's like. 6 or 7. Idk.) And ofc goes along with it

Naruto is like "I'm gonna be Hokage one day, believe it!"

And Kaveh is like "I dont know what that means but hell yeah kid! Chase ur dreams!"

And instantly Naruto is like "🥺 do u mean it"

And Kaveh is like "???? Uhh yeah, sure"

And Naruto is like "I changed my mind. When I grow up I am going to be ur architecture assistant and we will be family forever and build a big house for us and all of our friends to live in and—"

(Bonus points if Naruto sees Kaveh is a blonde and starts kind of wistfully daydreaming about them being blood relatives at some point)

So, yk, Kaveh entered the city as a civillian and they did the basic checks and he sees fine, so there's not much scrutiny on him. This is also during peace time so security isn't as crazy high as it might have been literally any other year he could visit. The fact that he's very obviously not a shinobi totally helps

So there isnt anyone really watching Kaveh?

And also security on Naruto is embaressingly weak, as evidenced by that time he broke into the hokage tower. So Kaveh leaves the village, and when Naruto tries to follow him— no one actually notices

I'm thinking. Kaveh left the village through proper channels, told Naruto he'd come back maybe. But Naruto was like "oh no my only friend is leaving and will NEVER come back :(" and decided to just. Follow him.

And when Kaveh notices him, Naruto begs to come with him. And hes already packed all his most important belongings too!! (It's an embaressingly small collection of things. And half of it is just packets of instant noodles)

Its the sad collection of 'all his worldly posessions' that especially hits Kaveh like a truck, and after a bit of deliberating hes like. Fuck it. You're a no one orphan and people in that village are SHIT. They won't even notice ur gone, and I can give u a better life. Come on kid, let's go to Uzushio together

And Naruto loses his mind celebrating and they set off into the sun hand in hand....how beautiful...

Meanwhile back in Kohona someone realizes Naruto is gone and the collective upper ranks of people lose their goddamn shit

THEY LOST THE FUCKING KYUUBI JINCHURIKI !!!!!!!!!! WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The fact that Naruto left of his own free will makes investigating who "took" him so much harder, but Kaveh was probably seen in his company multiple times by more than a few people (but disregarded as not a threat) so they eventually narrow it down to him. But like. It takes an alarming amount of investigation, unfortunatley

But like uhh. Kaveh and Naruto road trip to Uzushio,,, they are both learning about the Uzumaki clan together, having this great adventure exploring the shinobi world from the POV of civillians. Kaveh is teaching Naruto math and art and writing and reciting all this poetry n shit from the academy, and just in general giving him an honestly really good education. He's teaching Naruto the tools he needs to be an architect, since Naruto seems to be interested in it

(And then when they get to Uzushio they can maybe also have fun dissecting Uzu architecture and how seals interacted with it,,,)

They also have, just, NO fucking clue about the political disaster they've created. Both of them think Naruto is a nobody orphan and that legit no one will notice he's gone.

They are living in their fluffy found family road trip arc while they leave a massive fucking bonfire behind them.

Because of some sort of convolouted reason (possibly relating to how Kaveh's vision interacts with chakra maybe(?)) It is actually really hard to track them (don't think ab it too hard)

So Konoha is also freaking out bc they !! can't !! Find them !!!! This Kaveh guy must be an evil mastermind of some sort...this is awful...this is so fucked up...

Meanwhile, Kaveh is like half a mile from the konoha team sent to hunt him down and blissfully unaware of the looming danger as he uses his last dollar to buy Naruto some pork buns

Honestly I just want to see this kind of slapstick comedy of the anbu team continuously running into road blocks and coincidental decoys. And they keep going "holy shit this Kaveh guy is a mastermind, hes 5 steps ahead of us, this is so fucked up hes so dangerous" while Kaveh just. Has NO idea any of that is even happening. He and Naruto are living in their own little world rn

Konoha is also officially in a lose-lose situation bc there is little to no way to separate Naruto from Kaveh without irriversably damaging something.

God fucking help them if they try to kill Kaveh to get Naruto back— and understandable move on their part, with what little they know, but probably the WORST thing they could do here

Bad ending where they finally catch them and either kill or nearly kill Kaveh (which also, from Naruto and Kaveh's POV, comes out of FUCKING NOWHERE) and Naruto freaks the fuck out and goes full jinchuriki on them bc thats like. His older brother / dad figure who's basically adopted him at this point. And they just KILLED HIM !!!

They drag Naruto back to Konoha and try to "de-program" him from Kaveh's "brainwashing" but its too late and Naruto is officially deeply fucked up and traumatized by this entire thing.

By the time anyone even realizes the misunderstanding they can't fucking admit it because "sorry we accidentally killed that civillian u imprinted on, we probably should have just asked nicely for you back but I guess that was an oopsy teehee on us" sounds SO bad when ur trying to brainwash a kid into being loyal to the village again.

So literally their only choice is to just double down and commit to "no he was evil and we saved you from him" in the hopes that if they say it enough, Naruto will believe it

Thats the bad ending tho. Maybe Kaveh survived, who knows

Angry momma bear Kaveh coming back for his fucking kid ,,,,

Could a dendro vision be mistaken for mokuton? That could be fun to play with also ,,

Anyways ummm. I kind of also wanna see Kaveh adopting Gaara now too in his adventures, could be fun

Could be even funner if we continue the trend of "Kaveh keeps "kidnapping" important children without realizing they're important"

They go to Suna and Naruto runs into Gaara and they do the "Woah... ur just like me..." thing.

Then they get to talking and Naruto starts to share about everyone hated him but then he met Kaveh, who's special and taught him what a real family was like !!! And now they travel together and Naruto is so happy !!!

And Gaara hears "I have this special man who taught me what real love is like" and goes "Hm. Share perhaps?"

Long story short: Kaveh begins to be stalked by a creepy little 7 year old that everyone seems inexplicably terrified by. Which, like, look. He gets that the kid is weird but come on guys

Kaveh continues to be unimpressed by people in this world, smh

Naruto and Kaveh leave and Gaara trails after them and Kaveh is like "kid, I can't take you with me. You HAVE a family, you mentioned this to me already"

And Gaara is like, "teach me how to love or I will rend the flesh from your bones"

And Kaveh is like "Jesus fucking christ. First lesson on love: we do NOT threaten bodily harm on people we love, got that?"

And Gaara nods as internally he's going, wow I'm learning so much already

Kaveh, Naruto and Gaara road trip ,,, what could go wrong?

Kaveh continues to treat both Naruto and Gaara like the children they are, which blows both of their minds just a little bit. Especially Gaara, who had never had a normal human interaction in his life and is totally buying what Naruto said about Kaveh being "special"

Meanwhile, obviously, Suna is going fucking insane because they just LOST THEIR JINCHURIKI. you know, the KAZEKAGE'S CHILD?????

Gaara fully intends to go home. Eventually. Hes just gonna try and learn about this love thing first. His uncle will be very proud of how proactive he's being, he's sure

(Idk when his uncle was supposed to try and assassinate him and die bc of it, but for the sake of this timeline we are saying literally the same day Gaara fucked off with Kaveh. Unfortunate! Or fortunate, I guess)

On that note actually, Kaveh taking Naruto totally derailed the Uchiha Massacre btw. It was supposed to happen soonish, but the huge roar at the jinchuriki's dissapearence was a big enough diversion to put it on pause. Don't think ab it too hard, idk

Itachi ends up being part of the squad hunting Kaveh (team ro noises) and in the end, the Uchiha pull their coup when he's not looking and oops! They own the village now. Get fucked. Thanks Kaveh.

Anyways.

Kaveh starts complaining about how broke he is and how the kids are eating up his meager savings, and Gaara kinda goes "you should have mentioned this before. I could have taken something from father's treasury to help."

Kaveh, for the very first time: "did I... take the child of someone important...?"

Konoha and Suna join hands to try and hunt down the man who stole their jinchuriki's,,, alliance most ever ,,,

Idk where this is really going from here but just. Kaveh, Naruto and Gaara road trip. They still need to go to Uzushio. Learn some Uzumaki lore together, maybe unlock the secret of some ancient seals or two, idk

Kaveh eventually finds out these kids have literal actual demons in them and has to deal with that. But for a solid 90% of this he is none the wiser and thinks his kids are kind of freaks but overall harmless. No one tell him.

Doesn't Cyno have some sort of demon thing going for him? I really don't know much about him but I feel like I've heard that somewhere? But like, if he does, Kaveh potentially being somewhat normal ab the idea of demon possession or whatever

Tevat has some WILD shit in it, and Kaveh is a trooper. A loud, dramatic trooper who will lose his mind about the fact his kids were secretly vessels for demons the whole time, but a trooper

Kaveh and Kurama + Shukaku interactions,,,,, I need to see it ,,

Kaveh somehow interacts w Shukaku and his fear of a demon is overrided by motherly rage and they end up getting into a screaming match over parental rights over Gaara

Yk,, if theyre going to Uzu,, Kaveh somehow helping release the biiju anybody? Anybody? Could be fun.

Kaveh is such a genuinley good guy, this man is perpetually broke bc he keeps giving people passes on paying him for his work at every sob story (among other things, ofc)

I feel like if he learned the story of the biiju and had proper motivation + a method to free them, hed just do it. He'd just go for it. Hes a king like that. In Kaveh we stan.

Uhhh, as always, I have a couple more vague thoughts but I've been typing on and off as I work so a lot are escaping me. So Ill leave it here for now

Thank u thybirb for the jumping off point !! Ig I just needed smthn to kick the brain worms into gear.

Kaveh in Naruto,,, my beloved,,

I want to think about Kaveh (genshin impact) in Naruto but I haven't touched Genshin for longer than an hour in over a year now. I never even officially met Kaveh, I never hit his quests. So Idk if I can do him justice

But like, ,,, ough,,, Kaveh in Naruto ,,,, my babygirl most ever,,,

[howtosingit]

banter and bickering at the top of the episode (plus sex) and at the end of the episode (with the promise of more sex)??

help I love them so much