#thats really hard to jump over
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#i really want a therapist mostly to talk about things that would be nearly impossible or very sensitive to talk about with lets say a friend#like the times i feel monstrous because i cant take talking to my bro#i love him#i love him dearly but at times i just cant take interacting with him#he is autistic and we are so blessed that he started to talk and can communicate somehow in this way and id never deny this#but the truth is sometimes i get incredibly annoyed especially after prolonged contact#i know he loves me as well and i know he loves to hang around me because i talk to him most often#out of the people he knows#but comes a time when i get irritated pissy and i fear i might snap at him and I really would not want this to happen#it just irks me badly because i know what he will say i know how he will say it he has these phrases and ways of talking he mostly copies or#he does these things like a script and sometimes i dont feel like…#i just know we will probably never connect in a way i connect with my sister which doesnt make it worse but there is just this gap#thats really hard to jump over#and i can see people also have these knee jerk reactions at some of his behavior#and some are very bad at showing it and even get mad#i dont want him to feel bad about something he has so little control over if any#but i also know he feels bad about me distancing myself when i feel overwhelmed#its so hard to navigate this because i feel bad whether i do this or do that
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i might need to go on suicide watch or something, for my own safety, im not doing well but i want to make it anyways but i dont trust my brain at the moment to stay on track
#fuck this is bad#im doing bad#i dont kniw whats going to hapoen to me#i need to jump ahead in my schedule amd chnage documents NOW#which is hard cuz i have to drive across the state for that#and thats scary#trying to recruit friends#and pray to gid#that my mom doesnt fyck me over if/when she finds out#fuck#i just#um scared#im really scared#i need things to be nornal#i need people to be over#i need to not be lving in a faschist state#i need to kniw that im noy living with every one out of 2 people i see being someone who would vote against me existing#i just dont know#i dont fucking know#i dont know anything and everything seems so big and scary and like i cant do everything i need to do#i cant its big and scary and i feel like its all gonna be roadblockeduntil its too late for me#anyways uh... i dunno stay safe everyine i love you#reblog
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haha. hahaahahaha. i want to cry.
#my classmate who is very cool is on the other side of the shipping fandom from me#and believes that my side is VERY WRONG and SHOULD NOT BELIEVE WHAT WE BELIEVE#im more of a ship and let ship yk?? like it ain't my problem and it ain't affecting me so idrc what yall do#yall being literally everyone#anyway so i overheard her talking abt it to some other ppl in my class#and i got lowk scared cuz she seems like the type to like#get rlly heated abt it?? and stop being friends w me if i told her erm actually i believe that the ship you hate is canon#so im just gonna try to not bring it up in conversation? and not talk to her abt it? which sounds like me running away from#my problems but really i'm just trying to keep friends yk?? ppl r scary and making friends is hard.#anyway i still want to cry just not as much#guess i didnt tell yall what i was talking about did i#i was talking abt dkbkdk vs izuocha#im obv the dkbkdk here like cmon.... and shes over there yelling abt how “ITS TOXIC KATSUKI TOLD HIM TO JUMP OFF A BUILDING”#and allat like man u rlly think thats the reason we ship it.#no??#i ship it cuz a) theyre cute b) they make more canon sense than izuocha and c) cmon mannnnnn look at izuku that boy is not in love w urarak#of all people :skull:
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i feel so bad for cover singers who like to do a lot of anime music because rn one of the biggest anime openings to cover is Idol by Yoasobi which is hard enough to keep up with, like even if you can hit all the notes correctly you still have to figure out how to sell the speak-singing bits and thats a whole nother ballpark like dear god have you HEARD the sheer personality thats oozing from every note like the enunciations and the lilts and the subtle vocal fry like right before the ruby aqua bit in the “aida” like LISTEN
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okay that was really tricky to cover but we made it. and now what if you really wanna get that SEO? what if you wanna do another cover, usually doing the ending song for a popular anime is fun too right? lets hope its not as difficult to sing at the opening- AND then you get hit with Mephisto by Queen Bee and you explode on impact
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#they really killed all the cover singers with this combo#with idol at least if you have a distinct enough voice and enough character you can have that carry you through parts of it#but covering like any queen bee song is like. are you ready. are you ready. are you prepared#a lot of people skip trying to sing mephisto. i understand. hard enough to keep up with the lead singer of yaosobi#another thing entirely to keep up with avu chan doing avu chan things all over the track <3#by the way listen to everything queen bee has every produced right NOW#like not just all the high bits jumping into the lower bits and then jumping into even higher bits but avu chans vocalizations#those vocallzations mans. the vibratos the vocal fries the parts where they go a little nasal the parts where they go really open#god. i cant imagine how hard itd be to try to sing a song like this#some brave cover singers have tried though! ive found quite a few good covers actually!#but i definitely understand why its not as popular of a cover song choice as idol fhdjfskdjhkfd#did i ever make a tag for my musicposting#musicposting#hopefully thats my tag. i should musicpost more i always find it fun HJKFDJFD#anyway. listen to mephisto by queen bee right now. also listen to half and king bitch and of course fire and every song theyve made#PRIDE......LISTEN TO PRIDE......hey boys.... hey girls.... hey baBIES......listen to pride by queen bee right this instant#its still pride month for the next 30 seconds where i live listen to pride by queen bee right now
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Usually I wouldn’t gaf about this and move on but two times have i seen a character that the western part of fandom has a large group of people headcanoning them as trans getting informed about a mistranslation or misinterpretation that lead the group of people headcanoning that character as trans even harder have some random ass mfs go “see they’re not transgender 😂😂 westerners always trying to make them woke 😂😂 tired of these western fans not understanding cultural differences 😂😂 now theyre gonna start calling you transphobic be careful op 😂😂” when the original post never even denied that headcanon and was simply spreading information…. I find it so odd that these people are so quick to denying a simple headcanon that doesnt affect them at all. Or maybe im just looking too deep into it idk
#yes this is about scaramouche genshin impact#this was so hard to formulate lmao#again like usually i see stuff like this and roll my eyes because their goofy opinions truly do not affect me#but again i just find it. so odd that you immediately jump to denying a harmless headcanon#like no people dont think you’re transphobic for not headcanoning that character as trans#they think you’re transphobic because you constantly incist that that character could never EVEERAAHH be trans#like. ok??#i see this in the same light as when someone makes a harmless ship post ‘reaching’ about their ship#and mfs being like ‘ohhmy goodd yall reaching with this one 😂😂’#as if thats not a normal thing to do in ship spaces#like someone will see two colors and go omg (ship name) and you’ll piss your pants over it but when YOU see two colors that remind you of#YOUR ship then all of a sudden its right because you did it with your ship#so people see something that could reinforce their hc (in this case#they see the eng mistranslation calling scara an ‘it’#implying that he had no gender when he was created and people interpreting that as him choosing his own gender)#and people being like NOOO YALL REACHING 💀💀#but i promise you the second those same people see something that reinforces their OWN headcanon#all of a sudden its an intentional piece of information that the writers gave us#okay im sorry for ranting i feel really embarrassed about getting worked up about this#but honestly i’d feel more embarrassed about being worked up about lbgtq headcanons. so whatever.
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Oh unfortunately I mainly play on Playstation otherwise I'd totally offer to online play with you!
The PS online play isn't much better. It's pretty hard to get matched up but I have had a few successful ones.
I think Playstation is probably the most popular platform honestly, that and Steam.
Well if you - or anyone here - ever gets your hands on the Steam version, let me know, because I am in dire need of icons and backplates and I like it when the little heart number on my profile goes up. I'm really bad at it so you can get your ranked score up too.
#i also have the first game but that's on my Switch#I miss when the servers were populated! I would destroy people! I have beef with Todoroki mains!#I used to main Aizawa on the first game (obviously) and I actually got quite good at using him#I should probably look up combo guides for Mic because I find him really hard to use#he does a lot of damage but he feels sorta clunky#and I don't want to just do that jump punch loop over and over again or do his long range. people are gonna quit on me#guess thats the problem with mic he's just too good smh#I also hate using the speakers so that's like a whole move I just can't use#does anyone actually use his speakers#those things are horrendous#I have Gentle and La Brava but trying to figure out how to use them is like trying to break a cipher#maybe i am just stupid (very possible)
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my favorite commissioned song for each group in project sekai
l/n: flyway
MMJ: tenshi no clover
VBS: kashika
WxS: kirapipi kirapika
25ji: bug
#this post brought to you by:#i was listening to kirapipi kirapika and was once again floored by how much i fucking love it#and how immediately and viscerally it wormed its way into my heart 😭❤️#project sekai#.txt#also i had a rlly hard time deciding btw tenshi no clover and more jump more but i think tenshi no clover is underappreciated so i went w it#both are bangers tho i like them fairly equally just for different reasons yknow#also i picked bug over lower purely because i Love the 25ji version of bug and thats what i listen to all the time#but w lower i really only listen to covers by other ppl (and the mizuki solo but theres no full version of that sadly)#as songs in and of themselves? basically tied in my heart i adore them both#but as a 25ji song? definitely bug
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the corpse of king minos is very fucking big and Scary but you can parry his punches pretty easily and thats the easiest way i can explain how good ultrakill feels
#but even when the game is actually hard and kills me several times i dont feel like quitting?#i turn it off after 2 - 3 missions because thats the amount of time it takes for my body so get so Over Excited it stops aiming right#but i havent actually felt like ragequitti g#because the game just feels so good#i can ramble about how good ultrakill feels for HOURS bro#ramblings#switching between guns. the variants. coin tossing never gets old. accidentally exploding yourself with your own shotgun#fucking. SOUND EFFECTS#that too like when you parry. that sound?? makes my autism happy#THE SLIDING SOUND AOUGH#the fact that it does sound like ur made of metal but not in a bad screechy way that makes me want to cry#in a world where realistic movement physics are the norm having this much control. god#the witcher 3 is one of my favorite games ever. just as an example. but i DREAD playing that again knowing how walking around feels#yes sometimes in ultrakill you overshoot something because youre Fast but thats also just me needing to stand perfectly right for terminals#'look we have realistic physics' ok COOL BUT ARE THEY ACTUALLY FUN TO PLAY WITH#hyperrealism is impressive in videogaming YES but its also led to this monolith. in triple a#i do want to give credit where its due once i got used to the destiny warlock jumps (blink especially) that game felt really good too#but ultrakill doesnt force me to socialize and has a much more pleasant community so im fine where i am rn. actually#ive done all totk dungeons (I THINK) except for the final chasm and let me tell you. i dont want to fight any of those bosses ever again#why js that relevant? ive already beaten 1-4 twice and will probably go for my second 3-2 run tomorrow. THIS GAME. BOSSES. AAAAAAA#i love totk but those bosses were a fucking nightmare#thats gonna be a separate post
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How do you leave people behind?
this will sound so corny, but i find when i'm at a place where i'm considering cutting someone out of my life, i do a "pros/cons" list specifically about what they offer ME. good memories, bad memories, anything in between-- what does this person (who has somehow managed to make me feel so badly that i might want them out of my life permanently) actually bring to my life? what HAVE they brought to my life thus far, good bad or middle? when you go through your memories in a linear fashion, you'll get answers quickly, even answers to questions you might not fully understand (when did this feeling start? why did this feeling start? ect.ect.). &by the end, it will be very obvious what your answer is; i don't think i've ever gone through this process¬ come out on the other end with, not just answers, but the closest thing to closure i actually believe in.
#when i cut my exbest friend out of my life a few years back this process left me so jawdroppingly ashamed of how much i put up w#that when i found out she was trying to get back into my life a year or so later i laughed so hard i started crying.#shes lucky i didnt just record a video of that&send her that as a response lmao.#the thing is when you go thru this sort of process you also see pretty quickly how these ppl saw YOU. what they clearly believed about YOU.#like one of the memories that stuck out most was when she found out she was pregnant&when i tried to talk to her about it#she immediately jumped to thinking i was upset bc i cant have kids. i was upset bc i thought i might never get to meet her kid.#bc i was. you know. dying&homeless at the time lmao. that one memory told me everything i really needed to know about what she thought#of my character in regards to selfishness. &her messages asking me to 'rethink letting her into my life bc she missed the energy i brought#her&the headspace i put her in' on the other end of things let me know exactly what i was to her-- something to bring value to HER#&someone who would be totally okay w that arrangement bc im so desperate for company that ill take her shit presence over nothing lmao.#like every single memory i have of us together is bullshit. every single one is tainted by her inherent selfishness&abhorrent behavior.#not one makes me think 'yeah i should try this again it wont be a waste of my time&energy that only she benefits from like our LAST#arrangement' lmao. &thats the case w literally every person i have cut out of my life.#no matter when how or why they come back i didnt only cut them off i cauterized the wound before even letting them know i was done w them#lmao. we dont go back-- only forward. 🌹🥂💋#💌
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When They Call You Clingy So You Distance Yourself| Maknaeline Pt1
Warnings: Cursing, Mentioning of Blood
Pt2 Pt3 Hyungline (xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx)
JISUNG|
There was nothing you loved more than Jisung's singing. Well maybe Jisung himself.
But from the moment you heard him sing you knew that it was game over for you. You didn't know what you had done to have God bless you with the off chance of running into the chubby cheeked boy on the street during a last-minute girls' trip - the result of a horrible breakup.
And you sure as hell didn't know what you did to have him become smitten with you at first glance, softly asking for your number - even though it was obvious you weren't going to stay long.
But after a week of non-stop texting and meme exchanging it was obvious the feeling was mutual so long distance was something you were willing to try.
And it was the best decision you had ever made. Two and a half years strong.
The last year you had spent in South Korea had been filled with wonderful memories too, and you quickly found yourself getting used to living life with Hanji.
"Sungie!" You burst into the studio and Jisung jumped in fear. "I brought you something!"
He turned around with wide eyes and his mouth opened slightly. "What is it?"
You handed him a couple of his favorite snacks and an energy drink. "I figured you were tired since the guys told me you didn't come back to the dorms..." You wrapped your arms around him and peeked over his shoulder at to what he was scribbling in his favorite, beat up notebook. "What are you writ-"
Jisung quickly closed his notebook. "N-nothing."
"Lemme see!" You giggle reaching for it again. He quickly pulled away. "Jiji you always show me your songs!" You said, not noticing his growing irritation.
"Y/N stop I don't want you to see this one." He said grabbing his notebook.
"Why not?" You whined, trying one last time to grab it. "Thats are thing you show me your songs even before you show the guys!"
Your hands folded around the broken metal spine and part of the papers themselves and Jisung pulled away with an extreme amount of force.
The small part of metal that had no home in the small holes of the spiral bound book hooked its way into your hand. And with Han's forceful pull, ripped open your skin as well in a thing but deep wound.
You hissed in pain slightly from a small paper cut on your middle finger, which was ironic considering the much deeper gash in the palm of your dominant hand.
"Dammit Y/N!" He snapped looking at his ripped pages.
"I'm sorry I didn't mean to..." You said quietly.
"Well you did!" He mumbled turning his back on you looking for tape on Chan's cluttered desk.
"I'm sorry."
"Its whatever." Han mumbled, his back still turned to you.
You hold your wrist, you hand bloodied. "Jiji-"
"Y/N I want to be alone right now." His voice was firm, and you could tell he was trying to hide his growing anger. You wanted to respect his wishes but your injury seemed to throb even more by the second, even more blood spilling out.
You nodded but opened your mouth to speak again trying to ask him for help with your gushing hand. "I know but-"
"FUCK Y/N!" Jisung screamed slamming his hands on the table. "Just leave me alone! Stop being clingy for two seconds and give a moment to breathe! You just ruined something extremely important just because you don't know when to stop messing around."
You bit your cheek, trying to stop the tears that were pricking your eyes from falling.
You knew that Jisung was only calling you clingy to to get you to go away. To hurt you enough so you'd want to leave. He had done it before.
And even though it was a bad habit, it was proving really hard for him to break.
You quickly made your way out after watching your boyfriend for a few more seconds as he started tearing small pieces of tape from the dispenser.
And even still you couldn't help but have your heart flutter at his concentration as he bent down to carefully place pieces of tape on the ripped pages.
Dammit. Why do I always have to go and ruin things... You think to yourself as you head out to your car. Grabbing an extreme amount of paper towels to soak up the red liquid streaming from your hand.
You go to wipe your tears, but only smearing blood on your face causing even more tears of frustration, sadness and disappointment to fall from your eyes.
Fuck. I'm gonna need stitches.
You drove to the hospital, continously blinking to keep your vision clear through your emotional state. You were so focused on the road and replaying the whole situation that had just occurred in your head you didn't realize your phone was ringing.
Once you computed the ringning you frantically reached for your phone, so you could talk to Jisung - apologize, just talk things through - not remembering the state your hand was in and feeling it rip open even more, causing your phone to slip and a strangled cry of pain escape your lips.
Incoming call from - Jiji *heart emoji. angel emoji. squirrel emoji.*
Your phone had fallen in between the crack of your seat and you tried grabbing it while keeping your eyes on the road.
Incoming call from - Jiji *heart emoji. angel emoji. squirrel emoji.*
"Holy shit can't I-"
You heard the blaring of a horn and by instinct you turned opposite of the direction you heard it coming from, only to have the noise covered by metal crunching on metal.
Missed Call from - Jiji *heart emoji. angel emoji. squirrel emoji.*
Beeeep.
You have one new voicemail.
"Jagiya - I saw blood on my paper. Were you bleeding? Look, I know you probably don't feel like talking to me and that's valid. I say a lot of mean things to get space- and I know how wrong that is of me. Just...call me back okay? Let me know you're okay...there was...a lot...of blood. A lot...I'm worried. You can be mad but please just let me know, okay? I feel bad. I had a reason for hiding the lyrics; but it just seems stupid now. Because you got hurt because of me...I know I'm ranting but I'm worried sick. So please just...text or something. At least tell me you have the cut bandaged or something. Because baby if I would have realized sooner you were bleeding that much...God I feel like an idiot. Just call me, okay? Or you know what text if you don't feel like talking...just let me know your safe...the guys are worried too...you left a trail...God I feel so bad. Maybe I'm exaggerating but it looked like so much...I love you. Okay? I love you."
Click.
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FELIX|
You heard your front door unlock and looked behind you to see Felix walking in.
He slipped his shoes off and immediately headed towards the game room you had set up from an old study when you and him had frist started dating.
Your desk was still in the corner, but you had set up all of Felix's extra gaming things throughout the rest of the room. Stringing up LED lights and making it as aesthetically pleasing as possible since had taken a liking to filming some of his lives in that room once your relationship had gone public.
You got up from the couch and followed Felix into the room. He didn't seem like his usual cheery self. And his determined steps into the game room differed from his usually excited steps and leaned more towards annoyance.
"Lix is everything okay?" You asked, coming to stand by him. You placing the energy drink you were sipping on by him as you reach out to give him an embrace.
"I'm fine Y/N." He mumbled, trying to shake his PC awake. Then trying to turn on the LED's and lamp next to him. When they didn't turn on he tried plugging his phone in to the extra charger that he always kept plugged in at your home, groaning when that too didn't work.
"You seem upset love, you know I'm here for you."
"I said I'm fine." He snapped as he got up and started looking at the different wires connecting the lights and other various things in the room. "This damned thing."
You got up and looked at the wires yourself. "Let me see-"
"I got it, Y/N." Felix said sternly as he moved his makeshift desk back carefully from the wall enough to squeeze back there and look at the outlets.
At the same time you notice the extension cord didn't look like it was fully plugged in. You let out a small noise of acknowledgement and crawled under table to plug it in.
It was too bad Felix didn't notice your other hand resting on the ground for balance, as he stepped on it while trying to get a better look.
You yelped in pure shock, your head coming up to bang against the underside of the table- and Felix jumping back in surprise - and reaching out to balance himself but instead knocking over your drink onto his extremely expensive keyboard.
You had never heard so many profanities string from his mouth at once.
"I'll go get towels-"
"Are you fucking slow Y/N?!" His voice was harsh. Nothing like the gentle tone he always used with you. "Maybe you are. Would explain why you'd think a fucking corrosive drink could be easily cleaned from a keyboard. GOD." He groaned slamming his fist down.
"Felix I didn't-"
"I didn't know! I didn't know!" Felix mocked. "Well no shit you didn't know. Who in their right mind puts an open drink next to a set up that probably costs more than your monthly wages."
You felt your chin start to tremble and you tried to take a breath.
"You know maybe if you weren't clinging to me 24/7 this wouldn't have happened. Now thanks to you I have to find replacements." He grumbled pushing past you.
You turned to follow him like a lost puppy.
"Dammit did you not get the hint?!" He shouted turning back towards you. "You really are slow holy shit." He spat out.
You watched him make his way towards the door grabbing his keys and just walking out in his house slippers that's how angry you had made him.
"I can fix it..." You whimpered, trying to wipe your tears as you collected an arrangement of towels both dry and cloth. "I-I can f-fix itttt..." You whine as you hold the towels with shaky hands trying to mop up the mess.
"I-I'll fix-fix it-" You keep repeating to yourself until your vision is so blurred by tears the they flow over into the crevices of his precious keyboard. You try to soak up the mousepad he had customized, and the fabric of his chair.
"I'll...fix it..."
Soon enough those three words didn't sound like words you had said them so much.
Your hands were red and raw from scrubbing down the table so much. And you could barely even breath through your desperate cries.
His words kept ringing in your head.
He sounded so angry. You had never seen him like that. And it scared you. It scared you so much.
So much it had you considering if his accessories were the only thing he'd ever consider replacing.
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SEUNGMIN|
You sat in the dressing room, waiting for Seungmin to come back stage.
Tonight was the kickoff concert for their mini tour. Just ten destinations. A mix of normal venues, mini music festivals and things of such.
Ever since you and Seungmin had become a thing a little over three years ago, you had made it your mission to attend all of his concerts. While at first you flew under the radar of attendance- you soon became the "Where's Waldo" of sort when your relationship became public- stays doing everything they could to spot you in the crowd.
Tonight was no different other than the fact that everything went abswolutely horrible.
Malfunction after malfunction. Although most of the Stays were too preoccupied with the the visuals and the improv to really care about the mistakes on the crew end of thing.
And you had come backstage to tell Seungmin the same thing that all the Stays in the crowd had been thinking.
You did great.
Most of the time on Seungmin's shorter trips you stayed out of his way. Calling him and just infroming him of the different places you were visting in the cities, and asking if he would like any specific souvenirs. Thats the way you balanced out most. Thats the way things had worked and you figured they would continue to work...
Until Seungmin came in,.
"What are you doing here?" He asked throwing his jacket on the closest chair, and immediately going to strip off his shirt.
"I just wanted to come in and see how you were doing." You said quietly- gently.
"Appreciate it but you're not exactly helping my situation. I come into the dressing room for a breather - some space but your in here." He sighs grabbing a towel and trying to soak up his sweat.
You frown and look at him, his puppy eyes clouded with frustration.
"I just wanted to tell you that you did good...none of that was your fault. I just wanted to make sure you were aware of that..."
"Y/N. You're getting overwhelming. Seeing you home, at the studio in the audience- I can't catch a fucking break. Its like you're acting as my fucking shadow- clinging on to me wherever I go. Normal couples don't do that." He said as he stepped behind a portable stall to change completley.
You opened your mouth but closed it quickly, not wanting to start something you knew Seungmin was more than likely to finish.
"Like everytime I see you it's such a burden really..." Seungmin came out drying his sweaty hair with a smaller towel. "Like don't you ever get sick of seeing me all the time?" He gives out a smile and a laugh, but his eyes don't crinkle the same way they usually do.
You bite your cheek. "No...why would I get sick of seeing you? Why...would I ever see you as a burden?"
Your boyfriend looks at you in the reflection of the mirror, and turns to see the pain in your eyes.
"I came back here to comfort you Min...but instead you want to find ways to tear me down? So effortlessly at that?" Your voice is growing in pitch by the second but getting quieter and quiter. "I've spent three years supporting you in everything that you do. I've spent money to surprise you on trips Seungmin! When you know I don't have the money to do that!" Seungmin flinches when you use his full name. It had been so long since he heard anything other than a nickname fall from your lips when talking to him. "I always put you before me...am I really that much of a burden to you Seungmin?"
The quiet boy just looked at you.
"Dammit say something!" You exclaimed.
"I...don't know what you want me to say Y/N...I appreciate you coming to my concerts. I do...but don't you have another life outside of me?"
You clenched your jaw. "You're geniunely asking me that? When we've spent over three years together?"
Seungmin sighed. "You know I don't mean it like that..."
"Then how do you mean it?"
He fidgeted and opened his mouth to say something but bit his tongue and thought for a second more.
"You know what...maybe you're right Seungmin." You grab your purse and coat.
"Where are you going?" He asked, a bit of panic creeping into his voice.
"Away." You mumbled. "You're right Seungmin. I don't have a life outside of you. And maybe that's why this doesn't feel so right anymore."
You reach for the door and you feel both his hands wrap around your arm.
"B-Baby...y...you don't mean that...you don't." He pleaded softly. You watched as his brown eyes searched your face for any bluff. "We're right...we feel right-we we fit right..." His voice took a little pitiful whine to it and you felt as if you just kicked a puppy.
Right now he looked like a kicked puppy.
You had to turn your face away so he couldn't see your walls built in anger break.
Because no matter how petty you could be you wouldn't do that to Seungmin.
Would you?
"Seungmin...you think you can just go and say those things...the things that effortlessly hurt me?" You took a deep breath. "It's like you put no thought into how you crack my heart."
Not break. He couldn't break it...
"Jagiya...please...please stay?"
Couldn't my ass. He damn well could. And two could play that game.
"I'm leaving." You said pulling your arm from him roughly, knowing that you ripping yourself from the embrace you relied on so much would hurt him the most.
"You don't mean it...we're both frustrated...Jagiya..."
You decided not to look back as you walked out the door.
Knowing just how quickly your resolve you fold if you saw just how easily Seungmin's heartbreak was painted on to him.
You knew you'd fold the second you saw how his heartbreak mirrored your own.
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JEONGIN|
Please leave a message after the tone.
You groan as you guide yourself to the counter, holding onto it trying to find unwavering land in the battle of dizziness you were fighting.
Please leave a message after the tone.
"Pick up..." You groan as you try to hit the call button for Jeongin, your vision was clouded and you mistakenly pressed your second most recent call.
"Y/N? What's up?"
"Ji...Jisung...grab Jeongin for me?"
"Y/N...he's a little...irked right now. We were poking fun at him when you called but I think we went a bit too far... I don't think its the best idea..."
"Jisung, please?"
You heard Jisung shuffle around, and you heard the crunching of leaves as he made his way towards the sound of loud laughter.
"Innie! Your girlfriend is one the phone!"
You think you're hearing things when you hear Jeongin's distinct groan- but you don't have time to think about it before you hear all of his elder group members "ooh" and "ahh" at the youngest member.
"What is it?" The annoyance in his voice is evident.
"Innie...I don't feel good." You say steadying yourself on the counter. Your hands are slick with sweat, just like the rest of your body.
"Y/N I don't know what you want me to do about that." He says, covering the mic to yell something at the members- who are making kissing noises and mimicking romantic music in the background. "I'm hours away and I'm not gonna be back until Monday."
You whimper as you lower yourself onto the ground, your head swimming with dizziness - all while feeling as if someone tigthened a rubber band around your noggin.
"Stop being so dramatic and take medicine if its that bad." He finally says. "It's embarassing to have you blow up my phone while I'm on a guys trip - and even more embarassing for you to blow up my friends phones as well."
Something about the way he says my makes your heart sting slightly. As if you hadn't cultivated friendships with the guys as well.
"Maybe if you had answere-"
"Just stop Y/N! I'm not a baby! And having you cling to me...its making the guys think that. I mean don't you see how annoying that looks? Childish? Being clingy is downright childish."
You can't really focus on Jeongin's angry rant because you vision is getting blurry, and your head is throbbing so horribly, and your body is getting so clammy you can't focus on anything other than how shitty you feel.
"I think I'm gonna pass out-"
You hear Jeongin's exasperated huff. "You always have to make it about you don't you?! I'm trying to tell you how I want you sto stop blowing up my phone so damn much while I'm with the guys and you're here being dramtic. We're adults Y/N. We don't have to rely on each other for everything! So just lay down if your feeling that bad. I don;t cal you for everything."
You groan into the phone. "Jeongin-"
"Holy shit Y/N, can't you take a hint? For fuck's sake...I'll talk to you Monday." He said before hanging up, his tone exuding the aura of a typical "too-cool-for-anyone" teen boy or more specifically a hormonal attitude filled PMS monster.
You take a second to breathe, the nausea that was hitting you in waves only coming in faster and stronger.
You scrolled through your contacts and just clicked on one. Your fingers were trembling and you could barely press the speaker button before dropping your phone to the ground in a moment of weakness.
I'm gonna pass out...just...a minute longer...wait until someone answers...
You decided to not delay the inevitable and just lay on the cool ground that you'd end up on anyway. Might as well save yourself from an uneccassary bump.
"Hello?"
"I think I'm gonna faint..." You groan.
"The fuck? Y/N? What? I'm on my way I'm at the studio I'll be there in a minute..."
You give a small hmm and lean more into the floor if that was possible.
It brought you back to when you were a child, and would decide to randomly nap on the ground.
Maybe I am childish...
Maybe he was right...
You're mine clears as your mind goes static then black as if a switch turned on.
"Y/N? Y/N!"
When you open your eyes your blinded by lights and instantly annoyed by the beeping of mulitple machines.
"Y/N-ie!" You see the smiling faces of Chaeryeong and Yeji. Then Ryujin, Lia and Yuna's faces pop around you too.
"The doctor said your blood sugar was extremley low." Yeji said grabbing your hands. "He said that they're gonna run a few more tests on you too see what the cause of it was."
"We were worried sick when you called Chaer so we all came!" Lia exclaims.
You smiled gratefully, your head still throbbing slightly.
"Thank you." You said quietly.
"I called Changbin." Chaeryeong commented. "I thought it was best that one of the Kids relay the message to your boyfriend."
You pop up in bed, the sudden movement dizzying you. "What? What did you say?"
"I just told him we found you past out in your kitchen. At that point we didn't know what caused it...so all I said is we were bringing you to the hospital."
"Your boyfriend has been calling your phone for the last hour and a half." Yuna says nodding towards your phone.
26 missed calls.
"Hah...so he calls me clingy and childish then proceeds to call my phone 26 times?" You groan as you throw yourself back onto the hospital bed.
The ITZY girls look at you with sympathetic looks, Yeji squeezing your hands gently as well.
"Fuck it." You mumble, a fit of anger bubbling inside you as you swiped away all the call notifications, an insurge of pettiness filling you. "Clingy and childish my ass. I'll show him what that actually looks like."
(xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx)
@abovenyx @wolfs-archive @oddracha @iyeeeverydee @parisanmorovati @seungmincenteric @panbish-1209 @fxiry-vtt @sseawavee @shuporanporang
#skz imagines#skz x reader#stray kids reactions#skz reactions#skz stay#skz angst#yang jeongin#stray kids#lee felix#han jisung#kim seungmin
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demon slayer hcs: the hashira men as boyfriends
characters: tengen, sanemi, giyuu, rengoku, muichiro, obanai
AN: i don’t write for gyomei srry
TENGEN
- this isn’t just a little fling
-mans doesn’t wanna be ur bf
-he wants to be your HUSBAND
- and he’s gonna make that happen ASAP
- and when y’all get married you’re not just getting a husband
- ur getting 3 wives too
- it’s a package deal
- overprotective!!
- the way he made his wives promise to prioritize their lives over the mission
- my heart was bursting
- carries u around
- when tengen is around ur feet hardly ever touch the floor
- doesn’t matter how big or tall u are
- he’s bigger and taller
-he's big all over if ykyk
-nicknames include: sweetheart, princess, baby
- and don’t think he’s saying those to be cute
- he’s absolutely mocking you
-which brings me to…
- this man teases the HELL out of you
- but with love
- he loves you just as much as he loves his wives
- in his mind ur alrdy married
- and he is NOT letting you go
- or letting any harm come to you as long as he can help it
- 4 lifer fr
- id marry him
SANEMI
-i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again
-he’d tear it UP
-and i’d let him
- loves you so much
- doesn’t show it in public
- but in private?
- clingy as fUck
- he’s like ur shadow fr
- will follow u around all day
- hands on ur waist
- arm around ur shoulder
- holding ur hand
- he will not let go of u when ur alone
- in public he’s a lot less touchy
- but he will still stand near you
- jealous af
- every slayer knows by now to stay tf away from you or face the wrath of the wind pillar
- you belong to him
- makes sure they know it
- makes sure you know it
-hickey MASTER
-no i will not elaborate
- everybody knows sanemi is a little rough around the edges
- so there are days when it’s hard for him to open up to you
- but he does try
- he’s got a reputation to keep up!
-gotta act tough
-no weaknesses!!
- except for u
-he’s so soft for u he can’t help it
- nicknames: dumbass, idiot, & feather (my personal favorite)
-like i said he is almost always physically connected to u in some way when ur alone
-ignore him? he's throwing u over his shoulder
-he's strong he can manhandle u all over the place
-sheeeeeshhhhh manhandle me however u want sir
-claims ur super light no matter ur size
-hence the nickname "feather"
-i love him
GIYUU
-ik damn well this man had EVERONE in a chokehold from the first second he showed up
-speaking of chokeholds... ;)
-put me in one pls sir
-anyways
-awkward as fuck
-but he tries for u
-terrible with physical affection
-but we all know he's SOOO touch starved
-you'll have to initiate any type of physical touch
-and make sure he's not uncomfortable
-but really there's nothing he wants more than to touch you
-takes a very long time to say "i love you"
-but can u blame him??
-every good thing the poor man has ever had has been ripped away from him :(
-because of this he's veryyyy protective
-cause he'll be damned if the last person he has that accepts him and loves him for all he is
-is hurt or killed
-100% will die for u without a second thought
-not really a nickname type of guy
-remember he's awkward as hell
-most you'll get is a "-chan" attached to ur name
-and even that is only when y'all are alone
-but still
-even if he doesn't always show it
-you are always on his mind
-he's on a mission and walking through a market?
-he's buying you a hairpin or som
-walking through a forest and sees some flowers?
-"i wonder if she'll like these"
-AND HE'S PICKING U A BOUQUET
-ugh soft for bf giyuu
RENGOKU
-sunshine boy!!!
- epitome of golden retriever boyfriend
-all smiles all the time
-follows u around like lost puppy
-shows off for u
-yk when ur around kids and they're like "watch this" and then they jump and spin a circle lmao
-thats him
-"did you see what i just did?!"
-if u didnt...
-he's doing it again
-wants to impress you so bad
-also you will never have to lift a finger in his presence
-service bf!!
-you need the dishes washed and the floor swept?
-he's on it
-you need help styling ur hair?
-welcome to rengoku's hair salon
-will attempt to dress you in the morning
-and by dress you, i mean he's tugging ur shirt over ur head
-zipping up ur pants
-and tying ur shoes
-brags about you to anyone and everyone
-the other hashira can't have a single conversation with him without him bringing you up somehow
-compliments compliments compliments!!!
-he loves you and isn't afraid to show it
-nicknames from him: my love, my beautiful girl, sweetheart
-constantly confessing his love
-also lowkey speaks poetry for u
-some shit like
-"my light in the darkness, the one who gives me strength, you set my heart ablaze just by allowing me the privilege of seeing your smile"
-ugh he's the sweetest baby
MUICHIRO
-my airheaded angel baby
-i love him sm stop
-baby boy has a terrible memory
-that we alrdy knew
-but!
-he tries so hard for you
-keeps a little journal with notes and information about you
-so if he forgets he can remind himself over and over
-when he's on missions away from you he reads it so he can think about you to pass the time
-can not and will not remember anniversaries
-unless they're written in that journal
-will pick u flowers
-hope ur not allergic cause he's not gonna remember that
-but it's the thought that counts
-the fact that he's thinking about you at all counts
-you wanna go on a date?
-your dates consist of watching the clouds and taking naps together
-maybe a picnic if ur lucky
-no nicknames from him
-he calls you by your name
-its all he can remember
-he's the cutest
OBANAI
-like sanemi, he's a lot less affectionate in public
-however, he's not afraid to express his thoughts about you
-at least not to the other hashira
-might not be glued to your side
-but he's got eyes on u at all times
-and someone is talking about you?
-the second he hears ur name leave somebodies mouth
-he's tuned in
-and they better not say anything negative either
-mans turns murderous
-they will wake up to a snake in their bed
-will prob threaten them within an inch of their life
-don't have to worry abt other people while he's around
-cause he's got everything
-and i mean EVERYTHING taken care of
-protective but not pushy
-i feel like obanai trusts you and your ability to handle yourself
-but thats not gonna stop him from watching over you
-you're not drinking enough water?
-here comes obanai with a cup and u better drink it all
-haven't had lunch yet?
-he's sharing his with you. and will force feed u if need be.
-on a mission with him?
-he's not gonna push u behind him or anything
-but nothing is gonna get the chance to bring any harm to you either
-he's got ur back
-he's pretty vanilla with the nicknames
-nothing too crazy
-especially in public
-mostly uses ur first name
-might add a "-chan" in there every once in a while
-when ur alone he'll call you "sweetie"
-acts like a hard ass
-but he's soft for u
#demon slayer#anime#demon slayer x reader#kny x reader#kimetsu no yaiba x reader#giyuu x reader#obanai x reader#sanemi x reader#muichiro x reader#rengoku x reader#tengen x reader#tengen uzui#giyuu tomioka#obanai iguro#muichiro tokito#rengoku kyojuro
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wasn't me no one in this home of mine voted for anything of the sort and most likely anyone I know didn't either. I forget how many ppl live in the uk sometimes peace and love to the william wanters well and truly
#HONESTLY. not suprised though british mothers in their late 30s-40s i see you grandmas i see u the gay men peeping ur head out the corner#i see the princess fantasy it is not without its flowers i see it all and i meet u with acceptance#hes not ugly tho i'm the type where i don't think anyone really is or i haven't had that sort of reaction to anyone so idk though#also tbh idk how many ppl are actually taking those tests.. unless harry styles was on there because the fans the stans will get their favs#the acalades the little titles if they can with speed could be best juggler best dog shit picker upper best at climbing shit they love it#they love it all. their twitter handles at the top that shit gets cropped in obis paint on their iphone and put on twt like a proud parent#(i get it in that sense though its steering off the william topic matter)#with their kids art. was 1ce real in2 kpop and i got out to my benefit lot of shit long story i'm glad i'm in a better place now#since i got into in in probs objectively my darkest or some of my darkest not that u cant like kpop or talk about it or be in that scape#in a way thats positive or like healthy with me it was just not healthy unfortunately. my relationship is better with it now and i still#interact with content personally and more casually. i-#still have alot of love and appreciation for what ppl meant to me even if its different now i still have so much love for shit. just not so#deeply in the environment yk that round and round#standom as previous.. no doubt at the time i was thirsty for distraction i cudnt handle myself or my life basically my#life feeling like a fuckn tornado that was pissing on me so i probably no matter what were going to find vices but i have no doubt about th#talents and passion and artistry over there. all the racism and colourism n shit that just felt constant had a part#my conduction#what i surrounded me with my landscape because its a lot of inter like personal connections and heavy online bonding n just mess where its#like my fckn life force just i was screaming from the inwards outwards and still deaf to it. for me it was a host it turns out 2 be for man#cant track my gradual change really other than a year or maybe between 2 years we grow still thbink about stuff i hate myself for doing#the change happened gradually and naturally i feel though it all had dramatics its hard to track#there was shit before that when i was even younger and oh hellscape i fear it was bumpy i'm not gonna say it got better with age or smth#cause i dont believe thats true atleast not entirely i hate all of it i some of the connections i made are so key in my growth and i have s#nice wonderful like irrefutable memories i hope ppl r doing well so bad so bad some i even want to talk to again but i know for me i cant#give in 2 that pull and the day if i reconnect i will and hopefully there'll be wonderful ppl to reconnect with in that case to meet me#its all ever changing if i think differently in the future i do i just hope that will be me coming to understand myself and development#being hyper critical of myself tho i talk about me like i jumped through hoops to do detestable shit so its a balancing game and im wonky#its the fans the stans or its the royal family entourage they are vivid in my head or the ppl who came across it and decided to just add-#their 2 sence or saw it and were like hehe this is so unserious im going to be mischevious or take the piss lol#all of which get their acknowledgement its all fun and games truly those who take it serious will and shall however
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Just you
Summary: dean fails to understand that you need more then a body guard, you need your boyfriend.
Notes
Word count: 1.1k
Warnings; arguments, mention of s€x

Dean slammed the door of the motel room as you walked in behind him. "You don’t think I care!?" he shouted, louder than intended. "Dean, don't," you pleaded, your exhaustion evident in every breath. You had said the wrong thing in the moment, accusing him of not caring. After that, he had remained silent for the rest of the drive back to the motel, with an iron grip on the wheel. Now, all that pent-up emotion was erupting.
He froze hearing the exhaustion in your voice, but he couldn’t let what you said slide. He cared way to much and took your accusation as a personal attack. “No dont bullshit me…” he tried to keep his voice low but found it hard to control his emotions “of course i care! I care way to much!” He stated firmly taking a step towards you unhappy with the distance. “Can you blame me? Youve barely said anything to me dean!” You exclaimed taking a step closer. Your chests less then three inches from eachother. “Thats what this is about? That im not good with words?” He questioned with clear annoyance. You scoffed crossing your arms “your being mean” you whispered under your breath unable to look him in the face. “Well look in the mirror sweetheart” he said coldly. Your head snapped back in his direction “excuse me!” You shouted in disbelief. “Come on, you've called me mean and uncaring, like i wouldn’t take a bullet for you,” he explained smacking his hands to his side.
“You dont get it!” Your accusation was full of anger, but your face displayed distraught, eyes fixated on your boyfriend. You had to turn around, unable to face him without the feeling of tears gathering in your eyes. His cold expression dropped as you turned your back to him, his chest pang with guilt. He never meant for things to go this far. “Enlighten me, im not a frick’n mind reader” he explained, still with a hint of annoyance. He grabbed your forearm, turning you to face him. He waited in silence, letting you gather your thoughts. Your lip quivered looking up at him, scared of how he might react to the truth.
“I dont want you to jumping infront of a gun, or slaying a demon…i want you to show me you care by talking to me…and we never talk” Dean's expression fell, his once intense glare now fading into a look of quiet hurt. Keeping loved ones safe was all he knew; it was his only way of loving, never knowing you needed more then that. “Just to talk?” He questioned almost not believing you. You crossed your arms and bit your lip to hold back tears as you nodded “just one conversation that dosnt lead to a hunt or fùcking…i just want you” you explained whipping a stray tear from your cheek. He swallowed the lump in his throat “i didnt know you wanted that” he said quietly, taking a step towards you.
“De..” you tried to protest, but your words were swallowed by his actions. Drawing you into his arms, holding you with a grip that conveyed more than words ever could. You relaxed against him “i don't need a hunter…i need my boyfriend” you mumbled into his shoulder. His hand found its way to your hair, smoothing over it softly “I'm sorry” he whispered in your ear with a wavering tone. He was filled with such anger towards himself that holding you was the only thing preventing him from breaking something.
“Can we talk now?” You asked softly, removing your head from his shoulder but remaining in his embrace. He nodded silently “I'm all ears.” He reassured you. A small smile appeared on your face “About you” his eyes narrowed “About me?” He repeated back. You silently nodded looking up at him with wondering eyes. “Anything Dean” you explained seeing how long it was taking him. “You know, when i was a kid, i wanted to be a fireman” he admitted with a small smile. Your eyes widened “Really?” He nodded “i thought rescuing people was pretty badass, oh and the fire trucks were sweet” he explained staring into your amazed eyes. You chuckled at his comments “You’d be a great firefighter Dean” his smile dropped slightly “Yeah, maybe in another life”
“This.” You mumbled quietly. Deans head tilted not understanding what you meant “i like this.” You restated, moving back and taking his hands in yours. He smiled at your words, finally understanding. He liked. This too, just being here with you, holding you, talking with you. He felt like such a fool for not realizing sooner. “Yeah, me to…” he spoke softly bringing his thumb under your chin, tilting it up slightly so he could connect his lips to yours. His hand traced down to your hips, pushing you against him as his lips continued to graze yours.
“Your everything” you breathed against him. He pulled back, taking all of you in. “But let's not fûck tonight” you smiled placing your hands on his chest. He chucked leaning his head back “How dos dinner and a long late-night talk sound” he suggested raising his eyebrows. You smiled widely, reaching your arms around his shoulders to bring your lips back to his. “Id love that”
#dean winchester#sam and dean#dean winchester x reader#dean winchester x you#dean winchester x female!reader#dean winchester x y/n#dean winchester fanfiction#dean winchester fic#dean angst#dean winchester angst#supernatural fanfiction#supernatural
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alessia “you’ve been hitting the gym” (inspired by her arms in that golf story)
a.russo II morning menace
you chuckled as you returned to the room to find the mess of blonde hair and tanned skin still curled up exactly where you'd left her around an hour ago.
"alessia!" you sung out softly, placing down the coffees and bag of pastries you'd ventured out into the warm morning sun to get, unable to lay down in bed much longer, limbs twitching to do something.
all you received was a tired groan, exactly the same as the one you'd gotten when you tried to convince her to get up and come with you before, when she'd agreed to at least get up and shower while you were gone.
"lessi. babe come on i've been gone for an hour and you haven't even moved!" you laughed, jumping up onto the bed and staring down at the back of her head, another tired grunt all you got in reply.
"svegliarsi! svegliarsi, svegliarsi, svegliarsi-" you chanted wake up in italian, starting to jump on the bed causing her body to bounce up and down. "oh my god!" your girlfriend groaned in annoyance, reaching out blindly for you as you dodged her hands which tried to pull you back down into bed.
"alessia its nearly eleven in the morning. we're in the middle of italy, its a beautiful gloriously sunny day, the water temperature is perfect and i booked us full spa treatments for this afternoon. get up!" you dropped your body down on top of her causing her to grunt.
"can i smell coffee?" the blonde mumbled tiredly as you rolled your eyes. "you might, and breakfast pastries..." you trailed off with a hum, poking at the back of her neck. "from that little bakery we walked past yesterday?" your girlfriend questioned as she stretched out beneath you with a cute noise.
"maybe. you'll have to get up and see for yourself grumpy!" you moved her hair out of her face and leaned down to kiss her flushed cheek a few times, yanking the covers off of her as you stood, smacking her on the ass and tossing them to the floor as you jumped down off the bed.
"you really are such a menace sometimes." the girl sighed as she rolled onto her back, stretching out again and sitting up, pushing her hair to one side of her head and squinting at you tiredly through puffy eyes.
"oh? well thats a shame. suddenly i think i'm so hungry from my walk i'll eat all these pastries!" you shrugged, hand dipping into the bag and grabbing one out, shaking off the excess icing sugar and taking a bite.
"so good!" you moaned out mid mouthful, goading your girlfriend enough that she finally got out of bed with a huff, only clad in an oversized t-shirt with the sleeves rolled up. "good morning baby." you cheered as she stopped in front of you, a head and a half taller and looking quite unimpressed.
"smile, we're on holiday." you poked her nose, spinning around to dodge her hand which reached for the bag. "nuh uh, i earned these." you tutted, finishing off the pastry in your hand and reaching for another.
"less!" you squealed as suddenly your feet weren't touching the soft carpet of the hotel room floor, your girlfriend hauling you over her shoulder effortlessly with one arm, grabbing her coffee with the other and carrying you out to the balcony.
"you've been hitting the gym." you squeezed her rock hard bicep still hung upside down and humming appreciatively. "you should know, all you do is sit on the bench and stare at me while i work out." your girlfriend chuckled as you scoffed and hit her back.
"i do not! i do my own work out." you defended, though really you knew most of your workout was for your eyes which flickered around the room following your professional athlete of a girlfriend around the hotel gym.
with a teasing mhm alessia carefully lowered you onto one of the chairs in the sun before taking a seat in the other, snatching the bag of pastries out of your hand and stretching out her legs so her feet settled in your lap.
"are you comfortable?" you scoffed, the blonde nodding and dropping a pair of sunglasses you didn't even see her grab down over her eyes. "foot massage please." the striker ordered, digging her heel into your thigh expectantly and sighing happily as she took the first sip of her coffee.
"you're the real menace in the mornings russo."
#woso#woso community#alessia russo imagine#alessia russo x reader#alessia russo#woso x reader#woso fanfics#woso imagine#woso blurbs
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warnings. switch!beomgyu, idol!au, brief mention of choking
cant stop thinking about trainee!reader and idol!beomgyu, where gyu first introduces a fuck buddy relationship after sleeping with you one time, not aware that alone would be the sole reason his obsession and attachment manifests. just imagine dom gyu whos used to fucking with no strings attached due to the nature of his occupation and who thinks itll be the same with you until he feels bored enough to leave your messages on delivered. but idol!beomgyu who one day lets out his frustrations, too roughly and mean that when hes done and sees the hurt, the less than normal distance, gets some clarity to immediately melt into apologies, inspecting every inch of your body to be sure you’re okay.
beomgyu who for once, lets someone sleep in with him after sex all because of what he assumed was really bad guilty conscience. awkward as he attempts to scoot for some room, letting you cover your body under his blanket, just completely rigid as he stares at the ceiling with his hands to his sides like some soldier.
then…he does it again, he lets you sleep in, this time its because he’s tired and he can feel your exhaustion radiating off you. he’ll feel bad letting you walk all the way to your flat. but due to how frequent you get together, his arms feel more comfortable wrapping around your figure as you drift to sleep.
when he lets it happen the third time, it’s a problem.
you didn’t fuck, not even a quickie or a makeout session, just him, for whatever reason, asking you to cuddle. cuddle. “i’m stressed, with the comeback and all.” he mumbles lamely, biting down slightly on his lip, trying to convince himself as well.
“when you’re stressed… we fuck.” you say slowly, and skeptically.
just when hes about to backtrack and take it back you jump in his bed anyway, “whatever i’m not gonna refuse a good mattress.”
and then when you sleep with your face turned towards him, he feels like hes been sucked in, looking at every detail as if hes trying to have a picture in his head forever.
beomgyu who gets attached way too fast and way too quick that after the fourth time you‘ve fucked around and sees you flirting it up with soobin he absolutely loses it.
“i just got him a gift to congragulate him for landing the mc gig..why’re you acting like i murdered your entire bloodline?”
because thats what it feels like.
he inexplicably presses harder on your throat, shutting you up more by pressing his lips on yours, kissing and kissing till your lips were swollen, his brows furrowed deeply as you pathetically attempt to roll your hips into his. fucking you against the wall in a random artists’ green room, five minutes before a pre recording…hes fucking lost his mind.
god, he’s addicted.
imagine when your dynamic slowly flips, none of you are aware until you realize how often he follows you around like a puppy fan—you don’t think he was ever this clingy. beomgyu being the one who tries to meet up any chance available even paying you a visit secretly in the practice room at midnight, sneaking in snacks.
then its the sex— he’s more vocal, more sensitive when you touch him, moaning so loud you would have to clasp a hand over his mouth to muffle the sound. his eyes glaze over at times when you praise him and holy shit what the fuck was up with choi beomgyu.
the beomgyu you met that one day, fucked at a random hotel, and quite literally introduced hard kinks almost immedietely nows in front of you, crumbling down to his knees with his glossy eyes peering up at you like you were a god, begging you to use his face to get off. ruin his makeup. ruin him, please.
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“we should stop” trope with cheol
no smut, just suggestive MDNI
content tags: mutual friends to lovers (???sorta), cheol is a smoker (dont smoke..), reader is introverted, mentioned alcohol use, making out, being a bit freaky outside, cheol is hot
meeting your friends’ friends always had your introverted head reeling. “do i have to go?” you whine to jeonghan, one of your closest friends.
“no but you really should leave the house, y/n” he laughs. he was right. it was only a small get together at joshua’s (your other friend) apartment, it would only be a few other people, “you’ve met most of them anyways. plus you can stay with me and kyeomie as long as you want” he smiles at you as you finally agree to coming along.
…
surprisingly, it wasn’t as bad as you had thought. even though it was getting tiring dokyeom pulling you to meet all the people you haven’t been introduced to before, it was manageable.
“oh! i almost forgot” dokyeom says, looking at you, “you need to meet, cheol” he grabs your arm again, walking you over to another person youve never seen before. “coupsie!”
you watch as the man dokyeom calls for turns around, red hair looking like fire around his head, arms looking oh so delicious in the black shirt he was wearing, and his lips; god his lips, looking cherry red like he had just bitten them so hard they bled. he looked so intimidating with a scowl on his face, until he looks at kyeom and pouts.
“i told you to stop calling me thatttt” he sulks, lip jutting out. he finally seems to notice your presence, raising his thick brow before speaking again, “is this your friend you were talking about?”
“im sorryyy, the name is so cute, cheol. but yea! this is y/n!” dokyeom introduces, your face heating up with nervousness at the redhead staring down at you.
“hi. nice to me you…” you murmur, extending your hand for a handshake. what you didn’t expect is for him to take it and pull you a little closer to him.
“sorry” he laughs, “what did you say.. its too loud in here” you repeat yourself, stuttering over your words, before he finally pulls away, hearing the complains from dokyeom about cheol ‘teasing his friend’. “I’m seungcheol by the way. most of my friends just call me cheol tho. i prefer that.” you smile again before dokyeom pulls you away again to meet someone else.
….
the rest of the night went by smoothly, and now you finally had the chance to slip away from all the noise and step outside for a breather after having a bit too much to drink. the summer breeze felt refreshing compared to the heat coming from the apartment you were just in and you could finally take a deep breath in, admiring the night sky.
“too many people in there for your tastes?” you jump at the sudden voice, turning to see the red haired man from earlier, “sorry! i didn’t mean to startle you. it’s too many people in there for me too, if that makes you feel better” he smiles at you, before turning back to face the sky, putting a lit cigarette to his lips and inhaling the smoke.
“you know thats bad for you, right?” you say, backtracking when you see his eyes widen and him beginning to burn it out, “no its fine! i dont mind.. sorry im bad at small talk” you look down at your fingers, playing with them, still feeling his eyes on you.
“you’re cute.” he laughs. he takes another inhale from the cigarette before sitting on the steps of the apartment building. “sit with me” he pats the concrete next to him, signaling you to come.
as you sit close to him, you can smell the mix of smoke and his cologne on his clothes, the scent of them seemingly driving you insane, the alcohol running through your body making you scoot even closer into him, as if to try and smother yourself in the fragrance. “you smell really good” you say without thinking, immediately burning hot in embarrassment at the reality of what you just said. he turns to you, laughing loudly.
“thank you, cutie.” he smiles, looking into your eyes, “and you look very pretty. thought that since dokyeom introduced me to you. was trying to get you alone but hannie was protecting you like a mama bear.” you laugh before his words sink into your brain.
“what- what did you want to do when you got me alone?” you question, eyes looking him up and down. you were beyond close to each other at this point, you had practically one leg draped over his thigh, and you could feel his hand on it, steadying you a bit.
“you know what i wanted to do.” he says, eyes shifting towards your lips before looking back into your own, “i can still do it now.. if you’d like.” you only murmur a faint ‘yea’ and his lips touch yours, hands cradling your head, pressing you closer and closer together.
your mind sobers up a bit, realizing that you were currently outside, in front of your friends house, kissing a guy you met barely an hour ago. “we. should. stop.” you breathe out inbetween kisses. you know you don’t want to stop but your left brain was screaming at you to think logically.
“we- can. stop. if you want” cheol slurs out, lips kissing the corner of yours, a smirk resting on them. the moment you shake your head, he pulls you onto his lap fully, having you straddle his thighs. “you’re so pretty..” he sighs out, lips gliding down your neck, sucking a few times, leaving marks in their wake. your hands rest in his fiery locks, combing your fingers through them every so often as he pulls whines out of your mouth.
“cheolie…” you sigh out, grinding lightly on his thigh, testing the waters. he groans at the sight, pulling you in for another kiss before- ring ring ringgg
“fuck-“ he groans looking down at his phone now long abandoned along with his burnt out cigarette you didnt even realize was gone, “its shua. hold on, pretty. yea. uhhuh? oh. oh okay- okay bye.” you try to listen in but your attempts were futile. he hangs up the calls, lowering his phone and putting his hands on your waist. “‘m sorry, pretty. soonyoung is currently um- puking his guts out in a bedroom.. i’ll spare the details, but i have to help shua clean the mess.” he sighs, looking at you with guilty eyes.
you look at him a bit disappointed but nod, slipping off his lap. “its fine, cheol. go deal with that.” you smile and he smiles back before kissing your lips wetly once again.
“give me your number first. just incase i don’t see you before you leave.” he shyly speaks again, opening his phone again for you to type in your number.
“alright, here” you say, finishing up your contact information. “text me whenever.. now go! there’s vomit for you to clean” you giggle as he stands up and rushes inside again.
finally standing up again yourself, your legs feel like jelly as you walk into the apartment again, spotting jeonghan and dokyeom on the couch. “hey” you say as you sit down next to them.
“oh my lord, we were wondering where you were.” jeonghan say before looking at your state and gasping, “you look a mess? who were you with??” dokyeom laughs as your face heats up again.
“n-no one..” you splutter, biting your lip remembering the man you were just with. they roll their eyes at you, whining at the lack of details you were spilling as a ping comes from your phone.
Unknown Number
Hey. This is Seungcheol.
Want a ride home?
you can hear your friends gasp, obviously reading your messages at the same time.
You
yea :) would love that <3
you send your response and jeonghan nudges you teasingly, “seriously, choi seungcheol? that loser??” all you do is smile dumbly, excited to see him once more.
#seventeen#svt x reader#svt thots#seungcheol x reader#scoups x reader#scoups smut#scoups drabble#seungcheol imagines#yum yum seungcheol
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