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melancholycatastrophe · 1 year ago

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Only Friends Ep. 5 Thoughts

spoilers

not even two minutes in and someone is trying to kill ray, its not looking good out here

nick interrupting the raysand handjob is so wild because sandnick knows that top cheated on mew and they know mew and ray are friends and theyre just not gonna say anything to ray, thats crazy

the raysand and topmew dates are so cute i just know this isn't gonna last

sidenote: that wasn't actually topmew being cute, it was forcebook. the only way i can keep myself sane is by pretending its just forcebook

sand dressed the way i want to dress im going insane he's my favorite kind of boy: guitar player, rock and indie fan, leather jackets, anger issues, homoerotic tension with men - if ray doesn't want him I'll keep him

NOOOO MEW NOT THE GLASSES

top fixing mew's glasses 😭 he's too fine to be such a scumbag

mew's prescription is -5.00, he's just like me fr

am i tripping or is mew now hyperaware of every time top talks to another man because he thinks that they're all ex-hookups or top might hook up with them after? like what was that look when the server gave top the bill?

IS THIS BITCH--? IS NICK CHANGING THE WAY HE DRESSES AND GOING TO THE GYM IN ORDER TO LOOK MORE LIKE TOP AND GET BOSTON'S ATTENTION????? BOY STAND UP PLEASE DONT BE LIKE TOP PLEASE

bostonnick in the pool just reminded me of that one kinnporsche pool scene im sorry i was hoping they would have sex in the pool

also -- diversity win! the lying backstabbing guy who is playing with your feelings and ruining his friendgroup believes in safe sex!

another thing that intrigues me: does boston even like his friends? cuz we've seen all four of them together and having fun, and they look to get along well if you ignore everything happening in the background, but individually? has boston hung out with or just simply had a normal convo with anyone? mew has with ray and cheum, and im starting to believe that boston hates mew for something that happened in the past or is really jealous, but does he hang out ray and cheum just one on one? because at this point it feels like the only person boston talks to is nick, which is.... idk I'm just so curious as to how the raymewbostoncheum friend group came to be

also the fact that he's not even interested in the hostel. the only people we've seen truly working on it are mew and cheum, mew possibly because if it fails he loses his place as top student, idk why but cheum is a business major so she probably has some vested interest in this project. i'm assuming ray is a buisness major because of his dad and even tho it's technically his project - as boston points out - i doubt he wants to work in that field

"I don't want to sleep around anymore. I want to have sex with someone I can talk to and be affectionate with" boston the word you are looking for is boyfriend. you want a boyfriend, and nick is right there (for some reason)

instead of being called only friends, this show should be called "getting cockblocked by all your friends" because this is getting ridiculous. first raysand, then raysand again, then bostonnick, and then raysand again

the way mew wants his friends to be in serious relationships is soo......cute, but also funny that he's over here rooting for his friends meanwhile he keeps top in a situationship like bestie look in the mirror

also i will chew on concrete if boston only dislikes mew because of top oh my god its never that serious over dick

ray please stop talking to that girl omg summer is too pretty to be involved in whatever the fuck you and your friends have going on, give her to me

that concert scene makes me miss brightwin idk

atp I'm gonna assume that every guy who looks at top has fucked him unless proven otherwise cuz this is getting ridiculous

ah fuck....mew has fallen for top..... but anyway this confirms mew is probs demiromantic and demisexual

not the debt collectors 😭 is it really a rich x poor storyline if there's no debt collectors?

sand's mom owns....the go go club....i'm.....oh my god thats why he was there in episode like 2

ray singing sand a love song for his birthday oh be still my beating heart

not mew calling boston to tell him that he's ready to have sex with top 😭 bestie i get that he's your friend with the most sexual experience and you dont want to tell ray cuz he had feelings for you but oh my god why did you tell ton??????

but also "I'm afraid if I don't have sex with Top he'll get bored of me" after seeing so many people check out Top that day.....Mew is finally at a point where he has romantic feelings for Top and its probably for the first time ever and he doesn't want to let him go so he'll have sex with him, he's so real honestly I relate to him a stupid amount

also...okay wait....so is the friendship between bostonmew one-sided or is top truly the reason why their friendship will crumble in the future? cuz mew calls boston about top for reassurance and boston reassures him for some reason....

out of context topmew is cute.....oh their break up is gonna be awful

their first time having sex was so sweet and tender but i know damn well this wont last

ray and his mommy issues back at it again

sand distracting ray from drinking more by sharing personal details about his life....oh......oh....

sand was named after the place his mom and dad had sex oh my god....

ray's mom 🤝 ray

suicidal and alcohol addicts

"Only Cockblocked By Your Friends" the series strikes again!!!

it just hit me that they're eating weed cookies.....

also... "sand, this isnt your usual stuff?" does this mean sand sold ton drugs before or....?

ray keeps saying he and sand aren't dating and its breaking both mine and sand's heart

bostonnick and raysand drinking and partying together doesnt sit right in my heart....somehow someone is gonna say something bad while high

"even if you really like ray, i doubt it would work out between you two" whelp there it is

boston for the love of god shut the fuck up so we can have happy raysand and topmew please stop telling everyone and their mother that ray is in love with mew so that he can move on oh my god please its only episode 5 i need some happy moments between the two couples a little longer please

why is ton airing out all of ray's dirty laundry why is he doing the things that he does he's so messy i love it

well......ray and boston are probably not friends anymore

boston is too fine to be acting like this

now that I'm thinking about it....were boston and ray ever friends or were they just in the same friend group? cuz back in like episode one he was the one who was supposed to take care of ray when he was drunk and didn't so, like....

that last scene with sandray is sad and all but I'm too distracted over the fact that they're sleeping without blankets covering them

WAS THAT RAYMEW FIGHTING IN THE PREVIEW NO I CAN TAKE EVERYTHING BUT RAYMEW FIGHTING STOP DONT DO THIS TO ME

#only friends the series #only friends spoilers

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leafcabbage · 2 years ago

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Hello!! Hunger Games anon here and yet again leaving a question here before I forget lol. (Again, sorry if I’m piling these up on you 😭)

In terms of the DRDI lot, during the time when everyone was in district 13 and the second rebellion was in full swing, what kind of roles did everyone have? Like who was the ones going out on field missions and that stuff vs who stayed back in district 13 if that makes any sense ?

hi hi sorry about the delayed answer its due to i had to use my brain lol but here you go! dont worry about piling them up on me, i just happen to be interacting with the outside world more than usual with delays my replies /lh (thats in no way meant to be sarcastic at you its a little dig at myself for never going anywhere haha)

okay, so, i am heavily using the hunger games wiki right now because despite my knowledge of the books/movies it has been long enough that i need to brush up on them... gonna read the books again soon though. though i suppose i should stop apologizing for inaccuracies in an AU haha

tubbo's the mockingjay. he's the face of everything. he's out there in the field at times, and filming stuff at others. he's got bargaining power, which he uses to his advantage. his role basically takes over katniss's but still not exactly the same. but the rebellion needs a face and he's it

tommy is pretty much on the exact same assignments and stuff as tubbo, his job is to play the right hand man, the best friend, everything that everyone expects from him. basically he does what tubbo does but is still seen as less important. he's more expendable. or would be if tubbo hadn't made it clear that if tommy dies, he's out.

wilbur... if i was going to compare him to anyone in the books it would be finnick. his entire focus at first is getting techno back. (and niki and ranboo of course but techno is who he's closest to). phil kind of keeps him sane. he isn't really doing much fighting or anything until techno is back, and then he pretty much sticks with him, wherever hes going

niki and jack did a lot of planning attacks and stuff. niki isnt really able to go out in the field until later on, so the two focus on helping from back in 13.

sneeg is also a good planner and goes on the rescue mission to get ranboo, but after that the majority of his focus is on helping them. he's really stubborn and doesnt really do whats asked of him, but tubbo's got bargaining powers and makes sure sneeg doesnt get shit for it. Someone has to be with ranboo as often as possible

ranboo... is mostly recovering. i dont know exactly where they end up yet, it would be interesting for them to end up in that final move toward the capitol, but im not sure how feasible it ends up being.

ive gotta think more on some of the others i think, there is a FULL cast out here dang. but thank you for asking!!! i always love answering this stuff :D

#IM SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG IVE HAD IT HALF ANSWERED FOR LIKE A WEEK T-T #cabbage answers #drdi hgau #drdi au #hunger games anon

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lazycheesecakeee · 3 years ago

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Lovers in games

Pairing: Lee Hyunjae x reader, *sorry fo the implications I put on Sunwoo it was just for the plot*

Genre: SMUT, angst, even fluff if you squint

Warnings: the usual- smut, curse words, implied cheating, my writing???, not edited enough I suppose

Word count: 5.1 K

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"I know you're hurt, even if act nonchalant sweetheart" He says, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

The fucking audacity.

"How observant you are" you roll your eyes. But the stinging and bitterness in your heart were very much there, as you watched the party unfold, even if you looked through everyone, rather than at something.

Hyunjae chooses to shut his annoying mouth for a little, opting to pour you another glass of whatever concoction of cheap alcohol was served. He hands it to you, but the look in his eyes as you made eye contact does nothing but piss you off even more. Not that you weren't already angry.

"Stop looking at me like that" you shoot him a glare.

"Like what?"

"You know like what."

"No I don't. Enlighten me."

"Like you pity me." You roll your eyes. "Also you don't need to babysit me. I won't start crying and I won't drink my bodyweight in alcohol either. You know me enough to know that." You say, voice laced with saltiness.

"I know." He sighs, seemingly unimpressed by your rant. But knowing him, it wasn't like that.

"Maybe I just want to spend time with you. You've been so busy lately." he adds, looking somewhere through the crowd.

Yes. You have been. Between the mountain of assignments, work, trying to keep yourself mildly sane, and your little escapades with Sunwoo, you were virtually impossible to catch, even if he was in the same major as you. 'He wants to spend time with me' You roll your eyes internally.

"You're so full of shit that I wonder what made me talk to you, like ever." you say to him with an eye roll, not sparing him a glance.

"Because I was hot. Thats definitely why."

It was true.

Since everyone seemed to drool over him and call him mysterious and stalk his Instagram and praise every word that came from his mouth in class, you wanted to see what the hype was about. You obviously had eyes, so the moment he tried to sweet talk you, even if he was shit at the fuckboy game (he got embarrassed far too quickly by whatever came out of his mouth), you entertained him regardless. It was quite funny, maybe even endearing. Until you figured out what a little shit he can be sometimes. But keeping him close rendered advantages too. So, despite the constant nuisance and annoyance at his boyish remarks qnd mannerisms, you found he is actually fun to be around. Sometimes. And he liked cats. So you chose to keep him in relative proximity.

"True, you egotistical bitch. How is that working for you by the way? Did you find any interesting targets yet?"

"Nothing I would like to put any special effort in right now." He answers nonchalant.

"I see. Guess having people throw themselves at you has its advantages. You are not even working for it." You smile sarcastically.

He rolls his eyes. "So, why are you sticking around at this shit party after all?! Are you looking for targets too?"

"No. I just thought I would take advantage of the free alcohol and distractions."

It was true. Why go home and drown in thoughts of why your "boyfriend" would do such a thing, when you can chat up random people who probably don't remember you and drink as if it never happened. By the time it was time to get home you would be a mixture of drunk enougy and exhausted enough to just go to sleep without properly doing a skincare routine. And then it would be the next day. Ignoring the issue seemed like the answer for now. Or so you tell yourself.

"I know you expected better from him. And I know you're not gonna cry. I don't think I've ever seen you cry anyways. And this is not babysitting by the way. I do like being with you, I just happened to witness that. He's such a idiot for not knowing better honestly."

His words had this underlying honesty and objectivity. Like they always did. It kinda annoyed you how you admired the way he spoke about things with others.

You scoff. "Such bullshit".

But he is right about the timing thing. You haven't spoken to him more than "hello's" or acknowledging smiles in the hallways in weeks. But at this very party, when you were supposed to surprise Kim Sunwoo, your latest, over 2-months endeavour, Hyunjae happened to be around to witness you seeing him "mildly" cheat, to put it nicely. By mildly you mean witnessing a make-out session and this random girl trying to rile him up. He didn't seem particularly bothered. You decided to not make a scene and go outside. You werent per se dating. But it definitely stuck in your mind that you didn't really see either of them afterwards, you had to admit.

You honestly can't say you were shocked. You just stood there, barely even arrived at this ominous frat party and witnessed it go down.

Such behaviour was quite expected of Sunwoo. Everyone knew that. Including you. And you can't say you expected a dramatic change in behaviour from him, just because he chose to be around you more and fuck you regularly for the past 2 month or so. But it was still quite shocking of an image. It stung just the normal amount and made you feel slightly sick in your stomach and disgusted. And through all that as it happened, right behind you was the infamous older "fuckboy" you knew, Lee JaeHyun. He didn't have the tactics down as well as Sunwoo, you suppose, nor much of the typical behaviour. He cringed himself at any sweet talk or bold, cheap flirting remark. But it was part of his charm. Not that it mattered. He had people throw themselves at him constantly. And him seeing this while knowing of your business was making it worse. Now he stuck by your side.

But back to the culminant moments. He seemed quite shocked himself as he didn't take his eyes of Sunwoo and the scene, even as you kinda bumped into him to go somewhere else. He knew and saw, much like a lot of people, the two of you together quite a bit. He chased after you through the people. To the outside you looked just like you usually did, pouring yourself another drink, as if the one you had in hand was now too disgusting to look at. You downed the shot in one go. You went outside to breathe. He stood by your side. You came back inside. He stood by your side. He didn't dare speak. Until he did. And now, half an hour later, with a few more drinks in your system, Hyunjae following you like a hawk, and a heaviness in your stomach, you opted to sit on some counter and have underwhelming conversations with him, in a mildly sheltered place where you could hear each other and watch random people do stupid shit.

"Well, thanks for the therapy, I guess." You laugh as you down the rest of your drink. But you can't say you're not grateful for his presence.

"That's what I'm here for, love" he laughs.

"To be my therapist? I think it could rather be the other way around but sure. Whatever makes you sleep at night."

"You make me sleep at night" he says with a suggestive smile plastered along his features. What a good joke.

You give him one of the signature look whenever he tried flirting with you. A mix of "wtf" and disgust. "Can that even be qualified as a terrible pick-up line? It could pass for an insult honestly." You say with fake pity in your voice.

"Guess it's good I used it on you then. Constructive criticism on why I shouldn't use it. Besides, you also like insults. Win-win I say." He says with another arrogantly boyish grin.

You spare him a glance before rolling your eyes with a sarcastic smile.

"See? You can't even say I'm not right. I win." He winks at you. Cocky idiot.

"Anything for your ego, you moron." You add with an eye roll. "Degrade me senseless, Hyunjae." You say in a sarcastically submissive voice. "Is that what you want to hear?".

Of course it was. You don't exactly know what prompted you to say such a thing to him all the sudden. Maybe it was the alcohol. Maybe you were losing braincells. But you sense the change in the air immediately, in the way he turns to look at you.

It came that much better from your lips. He might not go around admitting it, but he wouldn't pass on the opportunity. He would like to have you at his mercy. To ruin you. But he couldn't let you know it was that easy to get to him.

"Sounds good coming from you. We should try it sometimes." He says playfully, taking another sip of his drink, maybe to hide the reaction you stirred in him.

You smack him playfully, smiling. "Is that your tactic, usually?"

"I don't need a tactic. People just can't have enough of me."

"How humble, just like I know you." You state.

"It's true." He adds, as if it's the most natural thing in the world.

"I know that. I see many girls everyday who talk about wanting their opportunity with you. It must truly be something. They don't even come back crying because you're an asshole. They just plan how to get to you."

"I see you have plenty inshight. If you want a taste we can always schedule something. You'll have priority in the list, too." He closes the space between you just a bit more than usual, looking you in the eyes. His gaze is powerful.

"Aww am I that special?! How sweet." you coo with sarcasm dripping from your tone. "Oh to be part of Hyunjae’s body count."

He pokes his tongue on the side of his cheek. If it's one thing he has, it's the audacity, besides the looks.

"Of course you are special. Besides, I bet I can make you cum faster than your shitty sound cloud rapper boyfriend." He adds, closing the distance even more, arms touching, and his lips touching the shell of your ear.

'Maybe sometimes... just sometimes... he knew what he was doing', you're thinking.

"What makes you so sure?" You challenge him, usual sarcasm barely covering the fact that you were flustered.

"I just have a feeling" he adds nonchalant as he comes face to face, closer to you. Sudeently eye contact seems impossible to hold. There is not anymore space you can back into on the thing you chose to sit on. And then he adds with incredible nonchalance: "If you wanna test the hypothesis, I can be your rebound fuckboy."

His hand is on your thigh and you don't even remeber him touching you before. And now it was digging and you felt the growing neediness in your stomach and lower.

"How sweet to offer" you add, almost breathless. When did he come to have such an effect on you?! You were fake flirting all along, after all.

But the moment doesn't last as all the sudden some drunk dude stumbles upon the edge of the small carpet and drops both bottles, shattering them into pieces, few inches from you. The liquid spreads and the shards are everywhere. But even with Hyunjae’s back fortunately covering most of your front, a piece of glass manages to cut your knee, not even mentioning his jeans are ruined. The pain is not high, you don't even really realize, as you were worried if anything got to hurt Hyunjae.

He asks if you are fine and you nod, he says he is fine as well and helps the dude get up on his feet.

"Your bleeding from your knee" he says concerned, and before you have time to process, he lifts you to take you upstairs.

The movement surprises you and as you adjust yourself better you cannot help but say "I can walk dumbass."

"I know you can."

"You're gonna get blood on you." You add, wondering how such a small cut can actually bleed so much down your leg.

"I don't care."

Finding an empty bedroom with a good bathroom proves pretty challenging but you manage.

He basically sits on you the bed but he feels the need to add "Sit for me sweetheart." as he goes to look for, you assume, whatever supplies. You are more shocked by his actions than the small cut. After all you had endless such cuts from not paying attention when shaving.

"Is that your usual line?" You raise your voice slightly to make sure he hears you.

"Whatever makes you sleep at night." He says, mocking you with your own earlier remark. He comes back fastly and sits on his knees to examine you knee. He takes your legs and lifts you again to move you further back on the bed have more space. 'Fuck why is he strong enough to do that so effortlessly?!' You think to yourself.

"Guess going to the gym so often is working for you" you say sarcastically. He only spares you a glance.

The sight of him on his knees on the floor attending to you was delicious, to say the least. He takes your leg and bends it to his will and after he is done disinfecting and applying pressure he puts a plaster on the cut.

"All set baby" he says and looks up at you, patting your bare thigh.

His job is done. But why do you feel like that wasn't even his job to begin with. You almost wanted him to disrespectfully look under your skirt. You wanted to feel his gaze and lust on you. So you take matters into your own hands and lift your leg just enough to give him plain sight of your crotch, just for a brief second. As if it was an accident. The crotchless underwear a sight to see, too.

He sees exactly through and his expression changes, and his hand goes on each one of your thigs, squeezing them, skirt slightly lifted from earlier still. You can feel his breathing on your lips. And the intense gaze he has on you. You wait for his next movement. The anticipation of having his mouth on your clit is beyond words, and you made it pretty clear, as desperate as that might've looked, you didn't even care.

"Is this your way of telling me you want your place?" He says condescendingly. "Because you will have to be more specific to get what you want, sweetie." That damned smile. He does know what he's doing, after all.

You don't say anything. You just grab the back of his head and kiss him, going down from the edge of the bed on his lap. He starts kissing you right back and his hands start to wonder. The material of his jeans feels more than amazing as you start grinding on his thigh.

He stops you in your movements. "No-uh. You don't get to cum like this sweetheart. You tell me what you want and I consider giving it to you."

"That doesn’t work on me" you say, disregarding his words on purpose. He lifts you and throws you onto the bed. The manhandling. You liked it more than you would admit. He comes on top of you.

"Is that so? Let's test how resilient you are, kitten."

The petnames were always a thing with him. But in this context it grows to affec you more than you would like.

"I bet you are exhausted from pretending all the time" he says between forceful kisses on your jaw and neck, which are bound to leave marks.

"Shut up. Good for you for not caring. Maybe you should show me how one day you fucking..." You say between breaths. He wraps his hand around your throat.

"If you are a good girl, I can show you everything and more" he says, seemingly not half as worked up as you were, despite the feeling in his pants saying otherwise.

"Shut the fuck up" you say and you wrap his necklace around your fingers, pulling him down. He is a better kisser than you would like to admit. Better than you thought. You suppose it's from the experience.

His hands trails downwards and under your skirt and when it finally reaches your core he can fully feel how wet you are through the gap in your lingerie. Fucking Sunwoo. He really screwed you over big time. You went to this kind of length for him. But it's not like he mattered right now.

"What an idiot. He could've had this and missed the opportunity" Hyunjae says, the dent in his pants rising significantly, as fingers barely graze your pussy. He lowers himself, going back to the edge of the bed and pulling you by your legs.

"I never thought I would see you on your knees for any woman." You admit, somewhat condescendingly.

"I only get on my knees for the interesting ones."

"And what makes me interesting?! The fact that you cam compete with that fucking asshole to fill your ego at my expense?"

You like getting a rise out of him more than you would like to admit.

He smirks. "No. The ego boost is just a natural bonus." He says starting to kiss up your inner thighs. "Observing you is always interesting. But watching you fall apart up close I guess is that much better." He says, sucking your skin, and you can feel it's gonna leave marks.

"You carry yourself well, kitten. Truth is I was surprised to see you with him in the first place. Didn't take you as the type to date fuckboys."

At this point your breathing was unstable and all his useless talk and intense eye contact while feeling his breath on your core was making you more needy than you thought possible.

"Oh really? Who did you think is my type?" You ask, just to keep up the seemingly unaffected image.

"Maybe someone like Changmin. You stare at him a whole lot."

"I suppose you're right." You say but it comes out breathy, as a moan.

"Already falling apart, huh? And I haven't done anything yet. Maybe I am your type after all."

He could be. You can't say no. And your pussy seemed to betray you like no other in front of him. There was something about seeing him like that, that made your brain go insane.

"Fucking do something" you urge him by grabbing his hair.

"Tell me what to do"

"Shut up and finish what you started. Your ego will get filled regardless."

He looks up at you as his finger grazes with enough pressure over your wetness and clit. But he stops. This little shit.

You render any rationality useless at this point.

"Fuck me Hyunjae. Fuck me until I have nothing to say. Fuck me senseless." You say to him.

'What an irony', you think.

"Now that wasn't so hard, was it?" He says as he starts rubbing you clit with more pressure and kisses your sex.

Ironically that he got you to be exactly where he said he could. And you even mocked him. But he put you in that exact place.

"Fucking finish what you started" you say, as you grab his hair, but his mouth was running laps already pleasuring your pussy.

And boy did he finish what he started. He did that and so much fucking more.

Half an hour later, or so you presume, you don't even think you can take more after how he overstimulated you. Maybe he was right about making you fall apart faster than Sunwoo.

After your third orgasm just from his fingers and tongue you have to plead with him.

"Fuck, Jae, I don't think I can take anymore"

"That's what you said after your second one too, kitten."

You raise yourself on your elbows and grab at his hair to bring him up on the bed, face to face with you. He gets up, taking your jawline between his fingers a little less than gently and bringing his other fingers to your mouth. You suck on them without hesitation, tasting yourself and his work on them.

"Fuck, you're so good kitten. You've outdone yourself." He says as he pulls his fingers from your mouth and kisses you deeply.

"Let me show you I can outdo myself even more." You say, trapping him with your legs on each side. You bring him down and turn the two of you around. He complies. You continue to kiss him and grab his crotch. He groans and you feel his cock twitch in his pants.

You skilfully open his button and zipper and your hand reaches in his underwear, stroking his head.

"Fuck, kitten." He says with another groan.

You push him back onto the bed and take his jeans and underwear down, just enough to take his cock fully in your mouth. You tease him by kissing around where he really needs you. Having the power back and watching him squirm in your hands in nice. But then he reaches and grabs you forcefully, flipping you over, face in the mattress.

"You think you have it, huh? You think I'm done with you? Sweetheart." He says arrogantly. "You think you can take my cock?" He says, whispering in your ear, pushing you into the mattress further by the back of your neck, his weight fully on your back.

"I can do anything you want me to" you say, head too clouded by the rush he is giving you.

"Aw, look who is being good all the sudden. Guess I've done my job well."

"Have you? Refresh my memory." You say, moving your ass so he call feel it.

"Oh I will rearrange your guts until you cry for me. Don't test me Y/N."

The use of your name made it that much more serious. The sterness in his voice made you shudder in anticipation and you hear him opening a condom. 'That was hot' you think. And he wasn't kidding. You were in for another long ride. By the time he was done you didn't even remember how to be coherent anymore.

"You can really ruin me just like that, huh?" You say, exhausted, as he cuddles you close. He even cleaned you up and everything. He was such a gentleman too. You didn't per se expect that from him. The duality between taking care of your wound, fucking you senseless until tears were forming, and now whispering nothings while stroking your hair was somewhat fascinating, all in the span of a few hours. "Now I get why everyone wants you. Guess you're not just hot." you add, rolling your eyes. Even if he can't see your face, you can feel him smiling proudly, cocky.

"Of course I'm not just hot. I'm perfect. And you are exactly what I needed."

"To prove your ego and your skills?"

"As I said, that's just a bonus."

"Hm. How poetic." You laugh, turning to him. "And full of shit." You add, kissing him once more before getting out of his embrace to adjust yourself. He lets you slip from his arms. You stand in front of the mirror and adjust your clothes, put on your jacket, taking your purse and checking your belongings.

"And you like me just like that. Poetic. Maybe that's your type. You can't even deny."

"Oh I can easily deny anything." you say, glancing challenging at him in the mirror reflection.

"Then I'll have to prove myself again, until you cannot help but admit it." He winks at you.

You turn around.

"As if you would get another chance." You throw his pants at him. "Get dressed, you idiot."

"Still feisty. I like it."

"I'll fucking show you feisty." You say, marching towards him and throwing his blazer in his face too.

"Oh I'm ready. You're still at the top of my list. Besides, a hypothesis cannot be tested only once. It's not relevant enough." He says matter-of-factly, suggestive smile still plastered over his features.

You roll your eyes. But you cannot deny even to yourself how much you like his words. "I am glad something from this forsaken college curriculum is sticking to you, you'll need it." You retort without sparing him a second glance as you go for the door.

He gets up fast and grabs your hand forcefully before exiting, turning you around.

'Guess the manhandling never ends with him' you think and raise an eyebrow inquisitively. But the only thing he does is kiss you again.

"Let me walk you to your dorm."

"I'll be fine. You've done more than enough for just one night." You say as you try to get out of his grasp.

"It's not like that. I just want to. Please?" He pleads as he hurries to out his jeans back on and check his things in his blazer.

"Ok. Since you want it SO BADLY," you playfully say, with a smile, rolling your eyes.

"I'll always want you badly."

You roll your eyes as you both exit the room. The party has significantly quieted down. Flashbacks of Sunwoo are still at the back of your head as you exit and you don't know how you feel about the turn on events of the night.

As you reach your dorm you wonder in the quietness how it has come you ended up like this. But you cannot say you weren't grateful for Hyunjae in this instance.

"Thanks for walking me. You get to yours safely too, ok?"

"Of course" he says, and opens his arms for one more hug. You give into it. It was nice after all.

"Anything you need just text me, ok?" He adds.

"We almost never text each other Jae-"

"Maybe we should change that." He says confidently.

You roll your eyes for the nth time. "Sure. Thank you Mr gentleman."

"Always" he adds, before turning around in the direction his own dorm, sparing you one more glance and a wave. "See you in class."

"Mhm" you say while getting into your building and letting the door close behind you. You wonder how the repercussions of this one will turn out for you. But just for this evening, you suppose you can let the exhaustion engulf you and go straight to sleep. Consequences and awkward talks tomorrow.

-------------------------------------------------------

Yeah soooo... I kinda wrote another thing. Hope you enjoyed! My braincell feels empty so idk how I feel about anything I produce but hey, here’s something :)))

Let me know what you think, also sorry for implying Sunwoo is a mild cheater it was for the plot and that’s it.

#the boyz #the boyz imagine #the boyz imagines #the boyz smut #the boyz hyunjae #hyunjae x reader #the boyz x reader #hyunjae imagines #the boyz fanfic #tbz #tbz imagines

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kekoma · 4 years ago

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— tendou as your boyfriend.

let’s be honest this man deserves the world and maybe more. hope you enjoy.

yeah dj? play tendou’s song please.

literally doesn’t make sense how some people find him un- 🤢 una- 🤢 damn can’t say it but you know what i mean.

when the dating news broke out between you two, it became quite the shock to people.

some even had the nerves to question your taste in men since no one thought a ‘creepy looking monster’ could bag the prettiest angel around or that you were being blackmailed to be with him but nope.

tori just has a good personality that people blindly avoided.

it also surprised him when you returned the same feelings since tendou became too immune with how people treated him and he never really assumed he’ll ever be accepted for once.

however you never saw him like that which hints to why he adores you so much.

your relationship with him being dull? NEVER.

can see him hitting you up one morning with; “haha good morning my sexy little sweet like honey with some whip cream on the side apple pie 😘😍😍😼🥵🥵😻”

and you’ll just respond with “thats the 10th time this week and you know what... the block button looks good 😊”

“oh no~ ahaha don’t do that lil mamas. you’re so sexy and i’m sexy too so y’know i couldn’t resist sending that powerful uplifting text ahaha 😈”

“sir goodbye! lose my number”

he jokes too much so don’t even assume a fight/argument can happen between you two UNLESS you diss one of his shonen jump then he’s looking at you funny.

also let me just put it out there— tori is literally the biggest simp for you, fanboy and cheerleader combined into one.

can’t even prove me wrong since you’re his lockscreen, a photo of you is in his phone case AND he has an album called ‘my paradise’

bonus; he has a powerpoint presentation titled ‘why my cutie pie is the best and why i gladly want to be step on by them’

he only brings it out if someone questions him about having a lover and the minute those words leave their mouth, ushijima is sighing while mumbling “here we go again...”

lowkey embarrassing but you love it nevertheless.

besides that— tendou also has the title of being your hype man.

let’s say you both are about to go out and suddenly you’re feeling insecure about your outfit. he’s gonna catch on then proceeds to unleash a series of compliments until you start to feel like a 5 course meal with 5 star reviews.

“you know... you look good so breathtaking and if we could bail, i’ll do it in a heartbeat and make sure you never feel insecure again~”

a tease? yes. forgot to mention that.

but let’s talk about nicknames right now.

as you could tell so far, tori likes to call you; paradise, cutie pie and lastly princess.

baby and ‘his pretty girl’ is in the mix too but that comes out when he’s teasing.

moving on, let’s get into pda with this cutie.

mans isn’t into the subtle pda. he enjoys going all out and making it known he’s whipped for you.

an example of this is when his team won a game and he automatically came over, picked you up and kissed you.

highkey didn’t want to let you down because something about holding you up gives him a large boost of energy.

so he’s definitely touchy in public and in private.

but he highkey does more that shouldn’t be done in public.

however if it becomes too much— make it vocally known and he’ll chill out.

kissing is something major so don’t plan on denying tendou those kisses.

it’s the only thing that keeps him sane.

backing away from pda— we’re on to dates.

tori loves taking you to the cafes, arcades, skating rinks, dessert diners, movies and even those karaoke places where you can order food.

speaking of karaoke; you should have known it was bound to happen. i mean you’ve heard his vocals. amazing right~?

with that being said, you both are definitely singing in the car together and i mean every single song.

dude has a playlist just for you when you’re together in the car.

tendou also has other playlists that he created for other occasions and each of them has a message attached in the description <3

and with one of those playlist; during those late nights, satori likes to put it on and ask if you’ll dance with him.

nothing wild since it’s late so you’ll be slow dancing with him while he whispers all the things he loves about you.

soft late night moments >>

literally can list off so much more but let’s just conclude he’s the best goofball of a boyfriend ever. he’s 100% appreciative towards you, does his best to make each second together enjoyable (bc tori definitely loves seeing your smile) and just overall good.

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loth-wolffe · 3 years ago

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Uh for the celebration thing 👉👈

I'm a party animal! I really love to dance and sing out loud with my friends. But I'm also a chill girl, I love to read or play the piano while it's raining. Animals are very important for me, I have an emotional support dog and a couple of horses that keep me sane 😌

I would really like to hang out with Kix and Jesse but not in a romantic way- I think it would be fun to go to a bar or club with them? Kix and Jesse seem to be good partners to go for a drink💅

Okay I'll shut up now byee I love u 💖

celebrate with me ✨

bestie<3 love u more<3

i was gonna say kix? but then you said like, not in a romantic way? and I don't know if you meant as in, kix and jesse together 👀 or what but I'll just go and say cody instead.

SO CODY MY BELOVED.

cody is TRASH for soft times so when you play the piano, he literally stops everything and wishes to be nowhere but there with you, listening to the soft rain hitting your window and hearing the lovely music, he likes watching you in your element, too.

sometimes you'd buy the same book and you'd read it while he's away, talking about it over the comms and cODY THATS A SPOILER STOP THAT. and he'd laugh quietly and say he's sorry but he isn't (he only tells you little things here and there, though, like "ohh, but when elizabeth goes to kent with–" and you stop him mid sentence because cODY can yOu noT. you just read that jane left to london, why wOuld yOU. or like, "you know when mr. darcy–" but he always cuts himself off before going MAJOR)

i don't know if dogs exist in sw so let's say you have a loth cat as a support pet, and cody says he doesn't like but he secretly loves ur lil cat and you've seen him play with it when you're home late and he's waiting for you.

he can't fool anyone really.

and alright. maybe you're friends with the 501st too, right, and cody sees you dancing with jesse and kix and having the best time, and he's usually not a jealous guy but HE should be dancing with YOU.

and cody isn't much of a dancer, or singing, BUT, jealous people sometimes do things that are outside our comfort zone. amirite.

so of course he joins you. hands on your hips, mouth on your neck and he'd whisper a few little things in your ear about how good ur looking.

"having fun, baby?" he'd ask, voice low in your ear and you giggle, between the alcohol and his intoxicating proximity, your mind feels foggy.

"mhm," you go, getting closer to him as you love, "more now that you're here, commander." and he smirks, looking smug, and he doesn't care who's watching before kissing you hard and sloppy.

you two probably dance the night away, drinking and laughing and having the time of your lives, and you sing to him some lyrics, shouting them as you jump and he laughs, a boyish sound that makes him look so young, flushed cheeks from the dancing, the drinks and your words.

(still I think 2 out of 3 times he goes and joins you bc he might not like dancing but he likes dancing with you. so yeah.)

#sorry for the pride and prejudice bit #i couldn't think of any other book and i know p&p like the back of my hand so yeah #cODY LIKES JANE AUSTEN SO WHAT #ari answers #ship games #400 followers celebration

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hutaoscoffinn · 4 years ago

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Seraph of the End RANT

Disclaimer: if you are a fan of Mahiru and get offended easily or ship Guren and Mahiru, this is not gunna be a post for you

Anyway everyone else who is still here sit back, relax, brew some tea because its time to sip☕️☕️☕️

This is a rant/kinda theory post about Mahiru’s character and her relationship with Guren bc while rereading some of the manga, rewatching the anime, and just looking back at some posts I have some shit to say

First of all, I have some MAJOR problems with Mahiru’s character. Like M A J O R probelms

I’m also extremely upset because she had so much potential to be one of the best characters in the series but ya know we can’t have nice things.

First of all her character is so misogynistic. She acts like she can’t do anything without her ✨man✨

She acts like she needs Guren for everything and like she’s weak without him when she isn’t. Mahiru isn’t weak at all. She is strong but she acts like she is helpless without Guren which is a big lie. She was able to function without him for ten years.

She was able to do a LOT without him but nope.

✨Now lets look back a bit to when Mahiru and Guren first meet✨

I’m sorry but what actual 5 year old is that obsessed with love and that obsessed with a boy. 5 year olds love a new thing every minute and it’s unrealistic that a 5 year old would be as set as Mahiru was on a boy that they just met. Its also unrealistic that said 5 year old would remember said boy and still be in love with them for TEN YEARS after meeting them.

Mahiru kinda acts like the Bella Swan from Twilight but she’s the crazy vampire and the overly obsessed one while Guren just wants to live his life.

Like honestly

Now her actions... good god where to begin

Well she manipulates Guren, lets her family use him as their punching bag, puts a fucking demon in him, AND THEN KILLS HIS FRIENDS IN FRONT OF HIM

In short, what the fuck Mahiru?

Like I think killing his friends after already screwing with his emotions like crazy is crossing a line

And Guren and Mahiru’s relationship was and is the definition of toxic. There was nothing good about their relationship. It wasn’t wholesome in any way. Being manipulated in a relationship isn’t good or wholesome in any way and that relationship was all manipulation and crazy.

✨Mahiru now✨

I hate Mahiru’s character now, maybe even more so. She’s kinda an ass (hardcore an ass). She keeps manipulating Guren and twisting him to do everything she wants him to do which again, is not healthy. Especially for Guren

Guren’s mental health is probably all sorts of fucked up and its all her fault. Like seriously, think about it. Think about all the manipulation, how she pushed him away from his friends, killed his friends, now he can’t get close to his friends, has to experiment on the people he loves, BECOMES A DEMON FOR CHRIST SAKE.

And why? She made him. Technically he had a choice, but in reality, she is making him and using his friends as hostages because they don’t have a lot of time left and Guren has to perform the spell again and save everyone before its too late. But he has to do it right this time so the world doesn’t end, so that there isn’t a time limit for his friends. And even then, he will bear the biggest cross if he comes out of this alive. He will bear the biggest secret.

Why?

Mahiru killed his friends. The friends he couldn’t live without. The friends he arguably loved FAR more than he ever loved her.

Like you cannot tell me that Guren didn’t love his friends more than Mahiru. Especially Shinya. Then again can you blame him? Shinya just wanted to make sure he was okay, sane, and genuinely looked up to Guren and cared about him.

Mahiru definitely didn’t truly care about Guren considering what she did to him out of HER OWN FREE WILL.

✨Do I think Guren still loves Mahiru?✨

Oh god no. I could argue that he never really felt actual love for her but tea ☕️

As of right now? He definitely doesn’t love her. I mean the man is 24 in the series rn and she’s a whiny 16 year old demon that has fucked him over one too many times. If he still loved her he would have lost ALL of his sanity (which he hasn’t lets be honest)

He also basically dismisses her whenever it comes to her trying to be “affectionate” which is 100% her playing with him and manipulating him. He acts like he’s trying to detach himself from her in the best ways he can whenever she isn’t forcing him to do what she says aka become a demon.

In fact I think that he genuinely hates working with her. I mean the things she is making him to can and will break him. And she knows that. Yet she continues to push and push and push until theres nothing left of Guren to repair. His heart is beyond broken and damaged and I cannot imagine living a day in his shoes.

I’ve already written a post on if Guren wants to resurrect Mahiru and I’ve already stated that I don’t think he exactly wants that to happen especially if the 100% old Mahiru isn’t back and even then that’s not a good Mahiru and even then there’s still the fact that she’s stuck in his cursed gear and that she is a demon.

Can’t see that ever working in her favor tbh and if it does thats the biggest plothole in the whole series and is major bullshit.

Also, if Guren and Mahiru ever somehow get back together thats a) extremely toxic for him and b) unrealistic in every way considering the bad blood that 100% should be between them

In summary I have an extreme dislike for Mahiru and her character and I hope to god that Guren can escape her somehow

Hope you guys enjoyed my rant~

#ons #owari no seraph #seraph of the end #seraph of the end manga #ons manga #guren ichinose #guren ons #ons theories #guren #shinya hiragi #shinya #ons rant #owari no seraph rant #seraph of the end rant #rant #anime rant #manga rant

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sweetbunnykook · 4 years ago

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Bunny! Im just so sry for venting bc ur blog is a space safe for me (prev self sabotage anon) umm so bcs of my low income family, it was drilled in my head since the age of 3 the concept of money, to the point that it was a common catchphrase from my mom that ‘do u have any idea what could i possibly buy if u werent born’ it got worse after relatives (from my dad’s side) drained him and kick us out the house and the ‘u shouldnt trust anyone in this world’ was introduced when i hit 10 after (1)

finding out that i essentially was taken as a hostage by my aunt (from dad family,,again) after my mom left me in her care and go abroad to find a job and then find out my aunt embezzle like 6 grand from her instead of paying debts piling and threatened to leave me in the middle of nowhere so my mom was forced to go home and after knowing all that i felt so so angry and guilty that my mom was right and im about to turn 17 in a few months and this time i had to go to college because i didnt (2)

continue my junior year bc i took a program so i just graduate after sophomore, i felt like i didnt spend any single second having a ‘normal’ teen life and am terrified of wasting youth due to the prospect of growing up because money money money money is programmed in my head and i cant even figure out whether is it beneficial for me to take a degree suited for my passion or take a degree thats more easy so the chance i can get employed higher (im so sry that i just basically told my sob story)

I’m really sorry you have to live in such a draining environment. We can’t control dysfunctional families and most of the time, because of how young we are, it’s difficult to find an instant way out. Planning takes time but execution will be worth all the brain-rotting stress you have right now.

Let’s address a few things first, okay? First, money is important but its importance shouldn’t make you feel like you can’t live your life. Growing up in a low income family, I was also often told of how terrifying money is because any big emergency can be devastating. My parents are strict about saving and we don’t go out to restaurants (maybe once a year, if we’re lucky), buy anything we don’t really need, or have friends that invite us to expensive places. Growing up frugal caused me to go a little crazy when I got to college and had extra scholarship money which I spent (stupidly) and didn’t save. But it made me happy that I can be self-sufficient, which is what money should really be about. If you can sustain yourself and indulge in little joyful things here and there, it’ll keep you sane until you are in the position to budget better and move out to your own space.

Second, education is important not because of what you’re going to learn in the field you’re studying, but because you learn how to navigate life. It’s true; it’s not what you know, but who you know. When you grow up not having taught financial literacy ALONGSIDE discrimination against the working or lower class, you don’t have a full grasp of your reality to understand the way out. Parents, especially, have little to no knowledge about how times have changed. A traditional degree is not the safest route to take. There are many people walking around with a master’s degree in biology unemployed because they probably were not taught the value of creating opportunities instead of waiting for it to come around to you. I only learned about that this year, by the way. It takes time to turn away from what you parents taught you about money and education and face the reality of today’s job market. There is demand for STEM majors because technology is a large part of our lives now and of course, you might have a smoother experience landing a job after graduation. However, every graduate student have their own experiences and you can’t predict what will happen. You can only increase your chance of being hired by developing skills and talking to people who can give you opportunities. I know an aerospace engineer who was unemployed for two years after graduation, a mechanical engineer who was unemployed for six months after graduation, and people who got a job a day after graduation.

Third, know that you’re not alone. You lost your teenage years to draining people around you. I did too. And a lot of my readers here did too. Although it’s upsetting that you can’t redo your childhood, it’s relieving that you are closer and closer to independence. You can still indulge in things you wanted to do as a teenager during adulthood. Last semester, I drove twenty minutes from school to a mall just to walk around aimlessly which was a dream of mine when I was little and wasn’t allowed to go anywhere with anyone. I still play old games I loved when I was younger and wander alone while skipping a class here and there. You have to do what you have to do to stay sane and trust yourself that YOU (yes, you), with your own efforts, will get out of there. Trust yourself, trust that anything valuable takes time to achieve, and that there are people out there who support you.

- 🐰

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onthoughtscliche · 4 years ago

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Hi! Just wanted to say hello and thank you!^^ While looking through your blog, I noticed you have a very aesthetically pleasant blog! Mostly Naruto related. It's been a very long time, but to reminisce about all the fun stuff the fandom did in the past, allow me ask you two questions: What is it that made you ship Naruto & Sasuke? And, what do you feel whenever you look at them?

Ohmygooooood HI BLUE!!!! IM SUCH A FAN of your analyses on SNS and Naruto as a whole back in 2014-2015 when it just ended!!! Super duper love your take on everything you write about 😍 Really really happy you left a message 💕 ANYWAY sorry, i didnt have the time to answer asap due to work.

For your questions 🥰

1. What is it that made you ship Naruto & Sasuke?

- to be completely honest, i started shipping them because of that accidental kiss. I was 9 years old and thought it was cute and funny and I didnt take them seriously. But as the series went on, i guess as cliche as it may sound, nothing else made sense? I had no tumblr or any fan account for the majority of the years that i watched them and yet I was so sure theyd end up together, no one else had to convince me. It was obvious, at least in my perspective. (Side: i believe that Sasuke left Konoha for the reason that he cannot grow stronger in Konoha to protect the people that matters to him AKA Naruto. The first encounter with itachi says alot about Sasukes resolve as well. And yes people can argue that Sakura is important to him too and i agree but not as much because he has only ever focused on Naruto. Even without the proof in the latter chapters, Sasuke was always so focused on Naruto pre shippuden) and i guess, the metaphors and symbols for both of then are just so beautiful because they really do fit together (ex. Sun and moon, soulmates, reincarnation) they even surpassed any romantic trope that i can think of.

2. And,what do you feel whenever you look at them?

THEY MAKE ME SO HAPPY but i dont know why or anything. It just, they feel so right. And i literally hate the ending because they deserve so much more and they deserve to be happy. :( i guess i just dont see the happiness they deserve in Boruto right now.. Theyre my literal sun and moon you know? Theyve been keeping me sane the past few months thats why im back in tumblr after 3 years of inactivity 😕

Thank you so much for this!!!! Im feeling extremely happy you left a message 🥰 i hope my answers make sense!!

#ohmygooooood #i remember your arguments with rem about how nh doenst make sense #and rayna was backing you up #and this other pro ender keeps on the butting in #and they ran out of arguments so they resulted to ad hominem and calling you and rayna dilusional #you really won a lot of arguments for this fandom and i just wanna thank you for voicing those out hahahah #blue-analytic #ask #thanks again 💕

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dimarunongmagdecidee · 5 years ago

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-----------------wakas---------------

Naalala ko pa yung time na inaayos ko yung blog ko. Sabi ko, hala gusto ko pag nagcollege ako magiging diary ko yung tumblr. So that may il-look back ako pagdating ng araw. Pero guess what? Sabi ng college life sakin "bitch u thot" hahhahaa i never imagined my college life to be this stressful and dreadful. To be honest, di ko alam pinasok ko. Lalo na nag accountancy HAHAHAHHA AS IN NO CLUE AT ALL. Pero anyways I'm writing this post to express my story in summary, sa caption ko kasi I decided to thank the people around me kasi deserve naman nila. Pero dito sa blog ko feel ko deserve ko naman iappreciate sarili ko. HHAAHHAHA.

Gusto ko lang sabihin na adjusting nung first year isn't so easy. Lalo na first time ko sa manila. Tho oo I'm a city girl, di ako galing sa province. Pero kasi di ako street smart so everyday ng byahe ko before pamanila i was very anxious na baka maligaw ako or may masamang loob sa sinasakyan ako or baka kung ano mangyare sakin along the way. Pero yung determination ko na gusto ko to. Dream school ko ust. Kakayanin ko. Kasi honestly di nila support na mag UST ako, aside from we're facing financial problems back then di rin nila ko kaya asikasuhin that time so I have to do all things by myself. Grabe ngayon, I'm super proud to that 16 year old wren. Nakakaiyak. Totoo ngang u need to get out of your comfort zone. Kelangan mong mag stand up kung gusto mo talagang mangyari pangarap mo.

Those 5 years were very rough. Ang daming times na muntik nako magstop. Ang daming problema. Mostly family and money. Yep, wala naman ako problema sa acads maybe that's why ang taas ng expectations nila sakin na ako daw hope ng family. Not gonna lie, sobrang pressure non. Parang wala ako karapatan mapagod. Pero you gotta make you weaknesses you strengths. At I wanna thank God for giving me a stubborn and tough mentality kahit anong dumaang problema sakin. Oo, nalulungkot pero lalaban parin.

I think it was my 2nd year nung naka adopt nako kahit papaano and I enjoyed my college life. Seryoso kasi parang wala akong buhay non nung 1st year. UST-Bahay-UST-Bahay lang talaga ako. No social life at all. Di ko alam siguro dahil time if of essence sakin dahil 4 years ba naman akong commute life. And mostly average of 5 hrs a day byahe ko (back and forth na syempre) pero ayun kinaya naman. GRABE UR A TOUGH GHORL. Pero don't get me wrong di nmaan ako puro aral pag uwi hahahaha nagppaahinga lang ako mostly sa bahay since nakakadrain talaga. I don't know sanay naman ako sa very focused sa acads na school since galing naman akong science high pero iba parin yung patayan dito sa AMV eh. Anyways, second year I started going out with blockies. Going to debuts, staying overnights, and inom na rin syempre :p di naman ako nagpabaya more like enjoying new things syempre uwi parin ako Alabang kaya kelangan may control HAHHAHAHA.

Third year, we shuffled sections because our program have to filter the students kung sino ang BSA at sino ang BSMA and luckily I am still accepted sa BSA iniyakan ko din retention exams kasi I was supposed to be exempted and matic BSA na pero bumaba GWA ko so :-( hahahahha anyways ayun nashuffle and I was super scaree that time kasi ibang mga tao nanaman. As you all know, super mahiyain ako sa mga new people unless sila un amag approach. So ayun another adjusting, another barkada. Solid din naman sila but things happened inside the circle kaya nawala din :( GRABE I CAN STILL REMEMBER THE CONFLICTS FRESH PARIN SA UTAK KO. Tho good terms naman proud ako gagraduate na kami, di lahat pero at least we survived.

Fourth year, I decided to join an org mostly because dun ko nalang makakasama mga OG tropa ko eince BSMA sila lahat at ako lang naiwan sa BSA so nag org ako and naging officer para magkakasama aprin kami kahit papaano. I was the Auditor of our college' local COMELEC. DI KO RIN SURE ANO PINASOK KO THAT TIME. Pero I end up loving the family and the responsibility. Oo, dagdag stress like LEGIT DAGDAG STRESS. Pero iba naman yung balik ng saya whenever you accomplish things and you serve the students lalo na't vital sa bansa natin ngayon yang COMELEC politics stuff. Grabe the joy of looking back sa things na dati akala mo wala lang. Ngayon narerealize mo yung impact niya sa life mo. Kung pano ka nagbago at naggrow. I am amazed self huhu PROUD AKO TALAGA SAYO SERYOSO. SORRY NA. Then ayun di ko pa ba nasabi 5 year course ako. So yung mga tropa kong MA, graduating na by this time. 4th year was when I became a social person kasi syemrpe joining an org tas officer ka pa dami makakasalamuha at makikilala. So ayun, diba nga nawala tropa ko from 3rd year that time, I can still remember how I always go to the classroom ng mga friends kong BSMA every break or every walang klase or kapag sila naman yung may klase nakatambay lang ako sa org room para matulog or magwait or magpalipas oras. Ghad those times I really felt alone, aside sa naiisip kong ggraduate na sila lahat tas ako maiiwan, nasasad ako kasi feel ko wala na talagang constant sa life ko lahat nawawala. Tapos dagdag mo pa na nung 2nd sem nalipat nanaman ako ng section shuta. Buti nalang. Buti nalang talaga super kind din ng mga tao sa napuntahan kong section. And I found my "Betsy" there. Oh diba sino bang mag aakala. Hahahahhaha anyways 4th year ako nagstart makistay sa condo ng friend ko since super hectic ng sched and di na talaga kaya ng uwian dahil yung sched ko panggabi tas may org duties pa. I stayed sa condo ng friend ko pero andon naman mom niya so may nag aasikaso samin. Grabe tita Beth super love ko siya. Sometimes I just stare at her and realize na at least may mother figure pa ako na kasama. If u dont know kasi (or if anyone is even reading up to this point) my mom left our family before ako nagcollege. Siguro gets niyo na why we had so many problems by now hahahahhaa. Anyways goods naman kami ni mommy siya parin tumulong sakin para makapagtapos hehe. Super thankful parin ako sa kanya syempre and ofc i love her still. Anyways ayon nga i felt another family kapag andon ako sa condo na yon which makes me warm and easy kapag andon ako. Super swerte ko talaga sa mga tao sa life ko. Bakit ganon? Super bait mo po G 🥺 shet naalala ko 4th year if thesis season pala. I can still remember the stress. Imagine may thesis ka, officer ka ng org, tapos sabay sabay pa lahat ng major exams grabe yun ata yung first time ko mag breakdown ng dahil sa acads. Seryoso, thats the nearest I was to breaking. Super hirap talaga for me lalo na di ata naiintindihan ng groupmates ko sa thesis na di ko makakayang 100% attentions ko sa thesis because I have other responsibilities. May nasira pang friendship seryoso. I never thought aabot sa point na ganon pero ewan baka ako rin yung mali don. I'm sorry guys!!! Pero congrats satin!! Proud ako sa inyooooo!!!

Fast forward, last year of my college life is IAC sem. Meaning parang rerun ng topic or review nalang for board exam. This time nagpaalam nako magdorm kasi shet last na to if I fail this one sayang naman yung mga taon. Kasi a lot of alumni told na kung madugo na undergrad, mas madugo IAC so I was determined to do better. And thankfully naman pinayagan nako magdorm since nakaluwag naman na and last na. I was so happy that time na magddorm ako shet finally. I wanted to feel independent or learn at least. Pero mostly dahil makakapagwalwal nako ng wlaang nakakaalam HAHHAHAHA char ofc part yun pero that's not the focus. Ayon, nung nagdorm ako I had the MOST SOLID FAM. Since nga diba wala nanaman ako tropa na makakasmaa kasi graduate na ofc so another adjustment nanaman sa life jusko every year nalang talaga. I dont know if sinasabi ko lang to because I am in the present and sila kasama ko now or its just i really feel the genuine love of this squad huhu. Or maybe dahil sila talaga yung nakasama ko through the darkest days sa AMV magkakasama kaming ginago ng sistema, ng admin, ng mundo and sabay sabay din kaming ggraduate ngayon. GRABEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE TANGINAAAA NAKAKAIYAK NAKAKAPROUD. LAHAT NG INUMAN, IYAKAN, PUYAT LAHAT YON MA LAHAT YON NAGPAY OFF. LAHAT YUN MAY REASON. LAHAT YUN DINALA TAYO DITO. Ang daming beses na nagdoubt kami if we could pero look at all of us now huhu lahat kami kinaya. As long as u got each others' backs talaga. Don't let anyone break.

Ayun to sum it up, narealize ko lang na I really value friendship a lot. Feel ko talaga they keep me going. They keep me sane. Super dali ko maimpluwensyahan pag kasmaa sila. They are both my joy and hope kapag stressedt huhu. Thank u self for choosing this path. Thank u for being strong. Thank you for believeing you can. Thank u kasi matigas ulo mo wala ka pake at nag aral ka lang AHAHAHAHA. NO MATTER WHAT LIFE THROWS AT YOU, LOOK AT THIS FEAT AND REMEMBER HOW STRONG U ARE OKI? I LOVE U WREN WREN CONGRATS TO YOUR ACHIEVEMENT!!! Can't wait to finally walk to that QPAV stage with my gradpic on the LCD and getting my diploma 😭😢

ALL THOSE 5 YEARS WAS LIKE A BLUR RIGHT NOW PERO I KNOW THE JOURNEY WASN'T EASY, IT NEVER IS. I HAD MY MOMENTS. PERO SALAMAT SA PAG OVERCOME LAGI. BE HAPPY WREN WREN. YOU DESERVE.

#life #for me #keeps #AAHHHHHH #lezzgoooo huhu

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killerwhitequeen-blog · 6 years ago

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Black Cloud (Ben Hardy!Roger Taylor x reader)

Anonymous asked: Hi! I aw that requests are open and was wondering if you could do a Roger Taylor one where the reader has amnesia and they are on a relationship and the reader doesn't remember. It can be angsty or fluffy, completely up to you!

A/N: I decided to go with both angsty and fluffy, hope you all enjoy, feel free to give criticism. Tbh this one is sad gamer hours so have fun with that

Warnings: Parent Death (brief mention), drunk driving, swearing.

The day had been off to a bad start for Roger, with Freddie making him redo his perfected drum solo a multitude of times, the skin on his snare tearing, having an argument with Brian over how convoluted his songs were and of course, not being able to see you.

You were stuck in work that day, with people you disliked and customers you detested, on your feet, for eight hours straight. Breathing out a sigh you cracked your neck, letting the vertebrae down your spine pop with it, feeling an instant release from some of works tensions.

You didn't know what would happen later but you had a sinking feeling in your chest whenever you thought about the walk home. Roger was unable to pick you up that day, busy with prior engagements, like the trip to the pub the band had been promising Fred for months. You understood completely and were actually looking forward to a nice quiet walk home before settling on the settee with a cuppa and watching mindless drivel on the TV before a good, deserved nights rest. But the storm cloud brewing in your stomach would not calm, it could not be satiated until the deed was done.

You called the boys before you left work that night, wanting to hear Rogers voice before he became mindlessly drunk, the phone picked up on the second ring.

“Yuh huh?” you heard Roger moan down the phone, obviously annoyed that he was the one to have to pick it up.

“Oh what a lovely way to greet your girlfriend Roger, really something to write home to mum about” you said sarcasm practically dripping from your voice.

“(Y/N) Fuck, I'm so glad you called, I've had the worst day imaginable... but you know what would make it better?” you could nearly hear him wiggling his eyebrows through the phone, making you giggle.

“No Roger, look, I only called to say, I'm leaving work now to try and get back home before it gets dark”

“Okay sweetheart, do you want to say hi to the guys before you go? We all miss you terribly” you laughed at his horrible attempt at a posh accent before giving your affirmation.

“SAY HI TO (Y/N)!” You heard Roger call through the studio and suddenly harsh footsteps were heard from the other end of the line.

“HI” all three boys shouted at once making the phone to your ear rattle slightly from the sheer force of the vibrations.

“Hiya boys” you paused for one second before saying “now ive really got to go Rog, I love you all and Ill see you soon, love you the most Rog, see you tonight right? No sleepovers at Brians, I dont care how drunk you get, I want to see you tonight”

“Bye (Y/N)” the lads yelled, rattling the poor landline once again.

“Bye love, I promise I'll see you later, I love you more than anything princess, bye” he mumbled so the others wouldnt hear him.

“bye” you said, putting down the handset and reaching for your bag, the sinking feeling in your gut getting worse by the minute.

You decided to take the front door out of work rather than the side, opting for visibility on the main road rather than taking the scenic route back to your flat. First mistake. You decided to look to the ground whilst walking. Second mistake. One minute you heard gravel crunching beneath your feet and in a split second you heard nothing but a blood curdling scream that you realised was ripping though your own throat. All you could see was black, the dark was so dark you could hear it, maybe even taste it but you weren't sure if that was the dark or the taste of your own blood filling your mouth.

You awoke in a sterile room, that looked like it had been scrubbed floor to ceiling so many times the plaster was ready to fall off of the foundation. You went to cough, suddenly aware of the thick tube that had been shoved down your throat, you gagged around it, throat closing up in protest to the intruder before you felt it being pulled out by the gentle hand of who you assumed to be the nurse but when you looked up you saw a man with a mop of blonde hair and striking, crystal eyes. Dressed in a simple blue linen shirt that was half buttoned and tight black trousers.

He looked at you as if you had just created the world and given it to him on a silver platter.

“You're awake! They said you wouldn't wake up for another two days at least. I missed you so bad princess” he exclaimed, grabbing your hand and just as his lips where about to graze your knuckles, you screamed. And you screamed bloody murder, it go so high to the point where you were pretty sure only dogs could hear you.

Your eyes darted around the room looking for something to throw at the man in front of you, before landing on the bed pan on your bedside table. Gripping it tightly in the hand that wasn't hooked up to any machines, you swung for the stranger in front of you. Or who you at least thought was a stranger.

“GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU CREEP” you screeched, your throat sore and scratchy, whether that was from the tubing or the screaming, you were unaware, but you knew that you wanted this man far away from you, you were only 18 and this guy looked around 30, if not slightly younger, but still weird.

“(Y/N) darling what's wrong?” he looked so hurt by what you said, you almost felt bad for the guy.

“I DON'T KNOW YOU! WHY ARE YOU HERE?” you saw the sheer pain flash in his eyes before he slumped into the chair beside you, looking as if the world you had given him was burning and crumbling before his eyes.

A dazed nurse walked over to you, so you assumed it was the small hours of the morning. “What seems to be the problem Mr . Taylor?” she asked the man sat in the chair next to you and all he did was point at you before his features broke completely tears tearing down his face at an alarming rate.

“I don't know who that is” you whispered to the woman, afraid to upset the man more though you did not know why you worried, or why your heart ached for him in the way it. A sinking feeling filling your stomach like a dark storm cloud stretching throughout your insides.

“Thats your boyfriend miss (Y/L/N)” she said to you “I'll call for the doctor” she mumbles to the sad stranger.

When the doctor finally come into the room you had been sitting with the man for around fifteen minutes, him weeping into his hands, looking up at you every once in a while just for you to stare blankly into his crystalline eyes making him sob even more. The doctor checked you over, shining lights in your eyes and all other kinds of bullshit you didn't take the time to remember, you were too busy trying to memorise “Mr . Taylor's” face .

“Roger” the doctor said in order to stir the man too deep in sadness to think of much else. “She has amnesia, it should begin to pass in a few weeks but you're going to have to help jog her memory. You can take her home now, make sure to bring her in weekly for a check up on her stitches okay?”

“uh... yeah definitely, I definitely will thank you doctor Phillips.”

The doctor turned to you and started unhooking you from the machines before helping you to your feet.

“Thank you” you mutter, an unexplained guilt still filling you whilst thinking of the sad stranger.

You let 'Roger' lead you out of the hospital and into his car, Wheel in the sky by journey playing faintly through the radio and you could've sworn you had deja vu of a moment just like this from a few years ago, a man with a blurry face sat in the drivers side singing his heart out and you told him you loved him. The memory was gone as soon as it appeared and your head spun from the concentration needed just to look around the car.

By the time you were at Rogers flat, his tears had dried but he was still snuffling his nose as if in an attempt to suck the emotion back into his body. “well we're home (Y/N)”

“I don't know this place” was all you could weakly whisper in response before stepping out of the car and towards the towering block of flats in front of you.

Stepping into the cramped flat you're hit with a wave of nostalgia, making you weak in the knees, Roger holds you up by your arm pits and leads you over to the sofa in the centre of the room allowing you too fall back onto it.

“You alright love? Do you need anything? Water? Crackers? Cheese on toast? Say the word and im on it okay? Just ask”

“Tell me about “us”” you say gesturing over the 'us' with air quotes and pointing to the seat at your side.

“What do you want to know?”

“Everything Roger” that was the fist time you had said his name since the incident and just hearing it made him smile radiantly, the sun should've been ashamed to shine compared to the glowing smile of the man next to you.

“Well, I'll start with what actually happened a week ago eh?” you nodded at this suggestion.

You were walking home from work alone, I couldn't come to pick you up, and you were all alone. You were just walking on a clear patch of pavement when a driver swerved due to being drunk at the wheel. Majority of the blow hit a lamppost next to you but you also took some of the brunt, you were knocked out cold (Y/N), christ as soon as I found out I ran to the hospital to see you but they said they had to induce a temporary coma due to blood on the brain. I didn't know how long I could last without you princess, you keep me level headed and I love you for that... we all do; me, Brian, Fred, Deaky especially. I need you with me always my love you keep me sane.

“I'm so sorry I wasn't there when it happened baby, I'm so fucking sorry” you sighed and took his hand

“I might not remember you right now, but I know that what happened was not your fault and you have nothing to be sorry for” you said with a conviction which your voice had not had yet that day, you knew this man was good inside and out.

That week people came to the flat to visit you, never remembering peoples faces had a tendency to make them cry. Roger continued to tell you stories throughout the time some beginning to jog memories like the angelic car moment.

We had our first kiss the first time we met, it was at a shitty uni new years party, at least it was shitty unil I saw you. You took my breath away angel, when you spoke you had the voice of a songbird, and your body... fuck it was difficult not to just ask you for a cheeky shag to be completely honest. It reached midnight and I saw you stood alone so I took my chance and asked if I could kiss you. You had been drinking beer and I could still taste it on your tongue it was heavenly. That's when I decided I wanted to take you out, do things properly date.

Roger broke the news to you that you were in fact twenty-seven and not eighteen like you though you were. He broke the news to you that your mother had died a few years prior of breast cancer. He told you how much he loved you and slowly but surely you returning to normal, remembering small details as he told a story, even the mundane ones where you would be reading in one corner of the flat with him writing songs in the other, staring at each other every once in a while eyes just filled to the brim with love.

He reminded you of all the arguments.

All the love.

The first time you told him you loved him.

The first time he said it back, nearly six months later.

He hid nothing from you and it worked wonders.

One morning you woke on the bed with Roger not lying beside you, confused you stepped out of bed, before remembering your accident, the amnesia, the pain you put roger theough.

“Babe?” you called as you stepped through the flat towards the sofa and when Roger looked at you, he already knew you remembered, there was no slightly vacant look behind your eyes. You had returned to him, his baby had returned to him and he could hope for nothing more.

He jumped off the sofa wrapping his arms securely around you and holding you tightly, he wasn't going no lose you again not now, not ever.

“(Y/N) I was working up the courage to do this before the accident, looking for the perfect time but I've now realised there is no perfect time there is only the now and we're lucky if we get that so (Y/N) (Y/M/N) (Y/L/N) will you marry me gorgeous”

You gasped softly at the look of adoration of Rogers face as he held and you nodded, holding an onslaught of tears.

“Yes, Rog, a thousand times yes”

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istheresomebodywhocanimagine · 6 years ago

Note

Because I’m selfish could you do a shipping me with members thing? I’m short, half Greek and Scottish but raised in Australia (yes, I do have an accent) I have really long brown hair and hazel eyes, and I play bass and sing. I love to read and write, and I almost always have headphones on and music blasting. I also am a drama student and I love to act. Thank you so much xxxxx Love your blog btw.

hi! don’t feel selfish for this, i’mma keep it real with you pal - i have asked for several ships before nO SHAME

anyways, in relation to BoRhap - I ship you with Gwilym!!! At first I was going to say Joe, but I think I see you meshing with Gwilym really well:

When Gwilym got cast as Brian in BoRhap, you were the first one he called. First, to break the news. Second, to ask you for a little help brushing up on his skills. He knew you played bass, and it wasn’t exactly lead guitar, but he still wanted to know all of your little tips and pointers in case there was something he could use when he finally met Brian.

In fact, he came over the next day with his guitar, already ready to learn. You were happy to oblige, but you admitted to him early on that you didn’t exactly know how well you’d be able to translate your bass-centered ideas to the guitar.

“What’s different about the two?” he’d asked, seated across from you and leaning forward over his guitar, genuinely interested in what you had to say. He considered you a great mind on the subject.

“Well, the mechanics are similar, you know, as far as that goes, but the fingerings aren’t going to be the same…” you rambled on for a minute, Gwil transfixed by everything you were saying.

After you were done speaking, he’d grinned at you proudly. “You’re brilliant, love.”

He calls you brilliant a lot, actually. It’s his favorite thing to say to you, because of the way your eyes light up when he says it. They are already brimming with all kinds of energy, but after he calls you brilliant - that’s when he’s the most captivated.

You heard that word - brilliant - coming out of his mouth the most often when he was reading over your latest writing, no matter what style it was. Poetry, prose, he loved it all.

“Can I keep this one?” he’d asked one time, holding up a piece of prose you’d written specifically about him. You grinned and took it back from him, looking over it for a moment.

“What’s so special about this one?” you’d asked as you sat back on the bed, preferring the poem you’d written about him a few months ago much more than this piece. But boy, did he have an answer for you. In fact, you’d never heard someone speak as passionately about something as Gwil would once he got going.

He stood up and gave you a 10 minute speech about why he thought you should let him keep that short story, introduction, body, and conclusion to the speech all included.

“So, can I?” he’d asked after a moment of you sitting there, dumbfounded. He gave you a toothy smile as he sat back down next to you.

“You were definitely born to be an actor,” you mumbled, handing the prose to him and shaking your head in disbelief at how much he’d fought for those two pages of writing. That’d gotten a chuckle out of him, and he peppered the side of your face with kisses before happily taking the story back.

Speaking of acting, Gwil LOVED coming to your performances. He took a whole week off of filming once just so he could see every night of your theater company’s Anything Goes.

He’d posted a big long paragraph about your performance after opening night, telling all of his loyal followers how brilliant you had been, and how proud he was of you. And, of course, he’d put some sentences in there about how much he loved you and loved going on this journey with you.

And then Joe commented “-Bri” just to make fun of how eerily alike Gwil was to his elder double. Classic Joe.

Now, if we’re talking Queen, I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I really think I ship you with Roger - HEAR ME OUT, I have some (probably weak) reasons:

The reason I think you’d caught Roger’s eye before any of the other boys is because of your accent - he’d latched onto it almost immediately after hearing you speaking to Deacon, who had hired you as a bass tech. You were both eagerly discussing some kind of system that Roger hadn’t a clue about, but your voice was like a drug to him.

He’d made a point of inserting himself into the conversation, introducing himself and chastising John a bit.

“How come I haven’t met your friend here sooner?” Roger scolded John playfully, John just laughing and shaking his head.

“This is Y/N, she’s my new tech. I figured I’d introduce her to the most sane members of the band first, but first I have to figure out who those are.”

You’d laughed at that, particularly because of the mock hurt on Roger’s face before he’d reached out to shake your hand, you introducing yourself this time.

“That accent,” he’d had to point out, letting go of your hand, “Where is it from?”

“Australia. What about yours?” you’d countered, noticing a bit of a different lilt to his words than John’s.

Roger scoffed at that, shrugging. “Cornwall. Exciting stuff, eh?”

After that day, he’d always find reasons to come and talk to you, sometimes the reason being no better than him wanting to hear your accent.

The day Roger realized he actually might fancy you was when he’d noticed you writing on one of the off days and asked to see a sneak peek of what you were doing. Roger loved writing songs, and wondered if you had any good material.

You did. In fact, he was thoroughly impressed by your work, and spent the rest of the day work-shopping with you, which spilled over into a late night coffee run before it was time to go hop on the bus to head to the next tour stop.

You were in the coffee shop, talking about what Queen had coming up after this tour, when Roger had redirected the conversation.

“You know, I’ve never asked, what did you study back home?” he’d inquired, curious to see what kind of person you were. He’d pegged you as some sort of major similar to John based on your identical knowledge of his bass, so he was pleasantly surprised when you revealed that you were a drama student. “An actor, huh? That must be why you’re so seemingly interested in all of Brian’s stories. God, explains so much now.”

You had to laugh at that, shaking your head. “No, no, Brian actually has some good stories and knows how to tell them. Now you, on the other hand…” you’d trailed off, Roger recoiling in slight insult at what you’d suggested.

Someone who could keep up with his humor and insult him while they were at it? You were growing on him quickly.

One thing he always really enjoyed doing once you grew more comfortable around him was (carefully) taking your headphones and listening to a little bit of whatever you were currently listening to.

At first, it annoyed you a bit, but when you realized he was genuinely wanting to pick up on some of your music taste, you allowed it to happen with little to no issue.

Also, he’d started slipping you song recommendations on tapes of his, labeling them cute things and drawing little smiley faces on them. Though it was difficult to understand his scrawlings sometimes, you cherished those tapes.

While we’re talking about songs, Roger liked to hear you sing. One time, you were trying to explain a part of the song where you thought Deacon wasn’t getting a good sound out of his bass to another tech, and you started singing the chorus part where it started sounding off.

Roger was, for lack of better words, shook.

Like, he loved your voice.

So, clever little gentleman he is, he found a way to start getting you to sing around him more by pretending to hear issues with the bass in the songs they’d play during their sets.

“It was like, it was muted during the last part of the second chorus, you know?” he’d said one time, working his way into it nonchalantly. “Like, the part where, you know, Fred goes, ‘and I love the things…’“ he’d trailed off, pretending not to remember the next part.

You thought for a moment, then you sang in a soft voice just to clarify. “And I love the things, I really love the things that you do, oh, you’re my best friend? That part?”

“Yeah, yeah!” he’d say, smiling and pointing at you like you were a genius for remembering the simplest lyrics in the whole set.

You caught on after a few times of false alarms from him, but you let him keep believing that he had you right where he wanted you. It was honestly really cute that he’d go through so much work to hear you sing, even if he didn’t necessarily need to try that hard.

(But don’t tell him that, for God’s sake.)

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entireoranges-creativity · 7 years ago

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Untitled and barely edited

After much self debate and following my heart and mind I have come to the realization that the top secret Garvez fic from a few months ago isn't going anywhere. I lost my mojo and am stuck. I know my track record and I'll never pick it up again. This was the main reason I was attempting to finish it before sharing as a work in progress. The thing is I actually like what I had (well most of it LOL) and I don't want my work to go to waste. So I decided to share it. I have it separated for the different chapters but for the sake of sanity just gonna put it all together. I suppose if anyone would want to continue it I won't argue with it. Sorry I wasn't able to finish it.

Title: TV Show: Criminal Minds Ship: Garvez (eventually lol) Note: Takes place after the events in 13.4 Disclaimer: I don't own don't sue

At what point exactly the conversation had switched to Garcia Luke couldn’t exactly say, but it wasn’t a topic that he minded. Being still new to the team it was Emily that lead the majority of the discussion sharing anatotes and silly stories she held in her head from nearly thirteen years of history.

“She really is something else huh?” Luke chuckles as he throws the final piece of garbage of their late night dinner into the bin.

“That she is. No matter how dark and depressing things can become Penelope Garcia is that permanent flashing light in the storm."

“Do you think she’s ok?” Emily sighs, she knew what Luke was referring to and the entire evening, even longer, it had been quietly buzzing in her head as well. Besides being a beacon of light Garcia was also sensitive at times nearly at fragile levels. The team respected that, gave her space after more difficult cases, didn’t reprimand her for her office not meeting FBI requirements.

“I honestly don’t know Alvez. That case...those children...I don’t know.”

“We’re trained to process these type of things, how exactly you train yourself to process shit like that, I’m not entirely sure but somehow we do. I know I’ll be okay tonight. Same as you. Garcia though?”

“Yeah. I know. Perhaps I should give her a call?”

“No. Better yet let’s just go over there Emily. I have no doubt she’s still awake.”

“And I know a diner on the way that sells her favorite pie.’ She stands up walking to the desk and pulls out her purse and keys from the bottom drawer. ‘Come on Luke our lighthouse needs saved.”

Title: TV Show: Criminal Minds Ship: Garvez (eventually lol) Note: Takes place after the events in 13.4 Disclaimer: I don't own don't sue

The topic of work in any capacity never came up. Anything that could be considered a stresser was held back from being said again. For the nearly two hours the three of them gathered in Garcia’s living room they didn’t say much in reality instead opting towards watching a movie. Neither Luke or Emily were surprised when a sweet family animated movie was selected. They all right then could use a non-stresser of a night. Trolls certainly was able to help provide that.

“I think she’s asleep.” There was no thinking about it, Emily’s soft snores gave away Luke’s quandary.

“Yeah. Sometimes I don’t know how she stays sane. Any of the team.” Garcia gently stands up from the couch careful not to hit the sleeping late night guest and removes a gray blanket from the bookshelf. Without saying anything she hands it to Luke who carefully lays atop of Emily.

“It’s hard.” He feels he should say more, try to reassure her that everything was gonna be okay, but she had already nodded solemnly and step out of view into the kitchen. Emily’s snores increase in volume and he finds a smiling at her fondly. In the last year, now more then a year he hadn’t recalled ever seeing her sleep. Everyone else on the plane had some point or other had slept on the often late night flights back to D.C. but never Emily Prentiss. Either working on something with the case or lost in thought.

“She’s pretty amazing huh?” Garcia had returned holding a Kermit The Frog mug with a liquid steaming out of it.

“Sure is. Gotta say with the nearly countless people who have served as my superior she's within the top 5.”

“No, she’s the best.” Garcia says matter of factly. Luke chuckles.

“Ok she’s the best.” A silence that held the room the majority of the evening has returned. Garcia takes a seat in the cushion chair that Luke had previously been occupying as she sips gingerly from the mug.

“It has to be hard for you.” She states after a few moments.

“What is?”

“To be in love with her and not be able to do anything.” At that moment Luke was grateful he hadn’t been offered anything to drink because he’d either do the ultimate spit take and or drop the mug onto the carpet.

“What?! I’m not.” He responses in a harsh and panicked whisper hoping it won’t awake a certain someone.

“It’s okay to admit it. Despite my repetition of not being able to I can keep a secret.”

“There isn’t anything to admit. Emily is great but yeah no.” Garcia lowers her eyes and glares at him as if trying to bore into his mind perhaps his soul.

“I’ve seen the way you look at her.” Luke stays silent, he was completely unaware of any looks recently he had given to Emily (or any individual for that matter) which would have opened Garcia’s opinion to this conclusion.

“Yeah um no.” He considers apologizing for not having feelings for their unit chief but opts against. That silence returns, this time it felt heavy. He pulls his cellphone from his pocket to get see how late it was. Twenty minutes til two. He was surprised Susannah hadn’t called or texted to see when he was coming by to get Roxy. He had previously informed her he was back in town and would get Roxy that night. Though apart of him suspected Susannah would dognap his baby and live on the run. Perhaps dressing the canine in silly costumes. Luke snickers at the images in his head and silliness of his delusions. He lifts his head back up to Garcia only to find she had followed Emily’s move and had fallen asleep. For a second he’s disappointed, he would have loved to know what she thought of Roxy dressed as a pirate. Perhaps another evening. He steps quietly to the same bookshelf that held Emily’s blanket and removes one for Garcia. He removes the nearly empty mug from her hand placing it on the coffee table before drapping the at times crazy tech analyst with a red and blue striped fabric.

Luke is about to make his venture out to get his dog and get home at last when it occurs to him he didn’t have a key to the door. He certainly didn’t have the heart to wake either of the women. And no way in hell was he gonna leave with the apartment unsecured.

Sorry if this wakes you. Can’t get Roxy tonight. Thx for watching her. Will get in morning.

Once the text to Susannah is sent a wave of pure nearly knocking you out exhaustion hits Luke. Garcia’s room with her bed was not gonna happen. He looks around and sees next to Emily is the only viable place. Spotting the light switch it flips it down and using the outside lights shining in from the window cautiously makes his way back the couch. In mere minutes he is asleep.

Title: TV Show: Criminal Minds Ship: Garvez (eventually lol) Note: Takes place after the events in 13.4 Disclaimer: I don't own don't sue

As an FBI agent and before that an Army Ranger he knows when someone is watching him, staring at him. His heart starts to increase in tempo, the fight or flight response is starting to battle within. Next to him something or rather someone starts to stir and push against his body. At that point Luke finally opens his eyes to fall upon Garcia in a different outfit then he previously saw her in staring down grinning. He turns ever so slightly to discover at some time that night the cushion of nothingness between him and Emily they both now shared the space. He even had the majority of what had been her blanket. Emily is the first to scrabble to her feet and make a beeline down the hall; he assumes to the bathroom.

“See? I told you.” Garcia almost says in a sing-song voice.

“See what?”

“You like her. Even if subconsciously you like her Luke.” He rubs his eyes fiercely letting a groan escape.

“I don’t. We were just two adults who slept on the same couch. Thats. All.” Garcia shrugs before turning away herself and walks into her kitchen.

“What do you want in your scrabbled eggs?”

“Actually I need to get go....”

“I got peppers, onions, sooooo many cheeses. What’s your poison L.A.?” He smirks at the newest moniker for his name.

“Thank you Garcia but if I don’t get Roxy soon I’m not gonna have her any longer.” The sound of a metal utensil falling on a tile counter, a gasp, and barefeet hitting wooded floor fill Luke’s ears.

“Oh my God what happened to Roxy?!” He understands smiling let alone laughing would be the worst thing to do, but God he couldn’t help it.

“Garcia she’s fine.” He at last gets out, her glaring at him helped speed up his recovery.

“You said you weren’t gonna have her any longer.”

“Yeah as in Susannah my dog sitter is gonna insist on just keeping her.” A stare down between the two commences, it’s broken when the bathroom door reopens and Emily walks back into the living room.

“Good morning.” Emily says to both, but her glance only lands on Garcia.

“Good morning my sweet princess! Sleep well?” Luke can swear Garcia gave a wink in his direction. He nearly throws his hands up in disbelief. What exactly did she think could have occurred with herself literally sitting a foot away?!

“Yeah it was nice. But I’m gonna have a kink in my neck.” He would have said the same if asked.

“I’m sorry my love. I’m making scrambled eggs. Just let me know whatcha want in them!” Emily’s eyes grow wide and without invention moseys into the kitchen with Garcia pivoting to follow. He remains on his spot on the couch hearing mutters of their discussion, refrigerator opening and closing, pots being shuffled around. He removes his cellphone. 7:37 and 5 missed calls and 12 text messages from Susannah.

“Shit.” He leaps up and beelines to the door.

“Everything ok Luke?” Emily pokes her head out of the kitchen, Garcia hovering behind.

“Yeah fine. Its just Roxy I need to...”

“Of course! Thank you for last night. It meant a lot to me.” Luke is surprised Emily didn’t turn at the gasp Garcia made, but grateful she was missing the apparent ‘I told ya I knew something is going on!’ grin.

“Anytime. And thank you Penelope for the movie and the couch. Maybe another time I can try those scrambled eggs.” His phone starts to vibrate still being on silent. Susannah, of course. The women give him a wave as he answers and slips out of the apartment.

Title: TV Show: Criminal Minds Ship: Garvez (eventually lol) Note: Takes place after the events in 13.3 Disclaimer: I don't own don't sue

Luke exchanges a look with JJ, it didn’t take six hundred hours in profiling training to have the sense something in that poor woman’s story wasn’t adding up. Or at least there were important elements being left out which could mean Kimberly’s life or another one of her clients being saved. He knew if anyone could dig through the half truths and missing information it would be a certain technical analyst.

“Cool hand Luke, what you need?” He smirks before giving an unexpected chuckle. And he thought that L.A. was an improvement.

“Wow, I like the way that sounds, Garcia. You feeling ok?” The opportunity to tease her about it despite the fact it made him feel good and appreciated as more then the ‘new guy’ or ‘newb’ couldn’t be passed up.

“I am naturally magnanimous in word and deed, and when it comes your way, bask in it. What do you want?” He feels his smile turning up again at her explanation in usual Garcia style.

“Listen, JJ and I’ Why he suddenly had a the foresight to mention JJ was prefy to this conversation was one he couldn’t answer. He assumed she knew he wasn’t alone, on calls like this it’s often groups spoken on speaker phone. ‘We need to run background checks on all the male members of the Desmond family. We were told that they're deceased, but we need verification.” Luke keeps going back to why would someone lie about that? What was being held back from them?

“So cyber grave-digging, look for zombies. Got you.” He won’t quite put it like that but any other response from Garcia he won’t accept or believe he was conversating with the real Garcia.

“You can start by double-checking a death certificate for Conrad Desmond sometime in '99.” JJ adds to the phone call helping reign in exactly what they were looking for to speed things along for everybody’s sake.

“I am the genie in genealogy. Just rub my lamp. That came out wrong. Goodbye.” The sound of her pure panic and picturing her expression was priceless.

“Wow.” Luke couldn’t help himself as he mutters at the dash of the vehicle.

“What did you do to her?” JJ questions a smile equally wide on her face. Luke shrugs not sure how to answer. He didn’t do anything to her, it was Garcia being Garcia. No more no less. He can see in his peripheral view that his passenger is staring him down.

“What?”

“You know what Alvez. I’ve known Penelope for over ten years. She’s the Godmother to both my boys. To say I know her well is understatement. And that Garcia right then and in fact almost anytime she’s interacting with you nearby isn’t the Garcia I have known.” Luke still is unsure of how to respond. This wasn’t the first occurrence he had been told this. He always chalked it up with the friendly banter he had with Garcia.

“It’s just Garcia being Garcia.” He hopes that’ll be a satisfactory response. He sees JJ shake her head.

“Nope. I don’t buy it.’ She pauses before her small smile erupts into a full ear to ear grin. ‘I think she likes you!” He knows immediately what definition of like was being applied. Great just great. Now not only was he involved with Emily occurring to Garcia; he now was involved with Garcia occurring to JJ. He never would have suspected working for the BAU was a keen to being back in high school.

“JJ, she can barely tolerate me.” He knew that was a lie. Their relationship had made great strides the past few weeks.

“No. I’m telling you Luke there’s something there. And she’s pretty awesome too. Just saying.” She adds the last part softly. He can only hope JJ didn’t see his eyes roll into his head.

Title: TV Show: Criminal Minds Ship: Garvez (eventually lol) Note: Takes place after the events in 13.5 Disclaimer: I don't own don't sue

Luke stares out the window of the jet the latest briefing of what they were arriving to in under an hour had just been completed. Various topics from the other agents filtered in and out of his ears but they were just sounds to him. She had been shot? Garcia had been shot? He had studied and learned the histories professionally and personally of everyone on this jet; and Hutch and Steven too. Then it occurs to him he had never fully cracked Garcia files or asked in-depth questions involving her. Not because she didn’t matter to him, rather because much as she was involved with the team she was an outsider and not a true BAU agent. Plus it was Garcia she sits in front of multiple screens 97 percent of the time, Luke could justify why he never asked her ‘hey have you ever been shot and have that shooting be in connection to your job?’ But he still felt guilty as if he failed her not knowing.

“It was one of the scariest things I ever dealt with. Still is.” He looks up to see Spencer has moved seats to the one directly in front of himself. Luke did know Spencer’s history and if that statement was true he knew it had to have been extremely bad.

“I just feel really bad that she has to deal with all that. I’ve dealt with, hell I will always be fighting the PSTS demons until the day I die, so I’ve seen the signs. That what we saw was it clear as day.” Spencer nods knowingly himself.

“What makes it worse is I don’t think Garcia has ever dealt with it. I mean really dealt with it. You deal and master your experiences with Afghanistan. I have started therapy for my time in prison...”

“You have?’ Spencer nods once again. ‘Good for you Spence. But yeah I hear ya Garcia for what I can gather her wounds healed, the initial emotional drama faded, and that was it. It works for a time, sometimes even ten years but unless she really faces it she’ll never heal.”

“I don’t think she realizes there is a wound still, at least not until a few hours ago. And in a couple days it’ll be covered up again.”

“Until there is another trigger which could occur at any time. It has to be hell for Garcia the knowledge it’s always somewhere lurking in the back of her mind and without proper therapy or help she can’t handle it.”

“I think just being there for her on the days it begins to crumble is all we can do. Because much as I hate she never got help I’m not fool to think she’ll ever seek actual help.” Spencer sighs and turns to the window as the jet begins its decent back to the ground.

Title: TV Show: Criminal Minds Ship: Garvez (eventually lol) Note: Takes place after the events in 13.5 Disclaimer: I don't own don't sue

“Great job everyone. I’m really proud of you guys. This one... it was a hard one.” Emily address her team as they gather up their assortment of bags and begin to get off the jet. At this moment more then anything Luke wants to pop open a beer drown it down, followed by another, and another until the world and more importantly his memories become a blur. He exchanges a look with Matt, his face expressing the same. He didn't have to contiune looking at the others to know they were all on the same boat. Not all cases created this reaction, but this was as Emily said a hard one. The herd of them follow towards their offices to clean up the last few things before the relaxation process when the group is stopped by an excited Garcia and JJ equally as joy filled.

"Oh! Here they are. It's the whole everyone, ok, whole family, whole family is here. Whole family, I would like to take this opportunity to formally apologize. I am so..." She says with a pure sincerty in her words. Luke all during the case and away from her wanted to give her a call, send a text. to do anything to allow her knowledge of the fact he cared; but he knew that others on the team had gone an amazing job keeping her head above the water line.

"You don't have to apologize. We all understand from experience." Emily poiletly cuts Garcia off.

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"All right. I'll shake that off. Uh, I am going to recommit to living life to the fullest.' Something in Luke strings, as he and Spencer had previously discussed she was covering up the pain. He sure a visit with Derek Morgan did wonders for her and was a great bandaid, but this simple solution of shaking it off didn't fly for him. 'Right now, to that end, I'd like to invite everybody over to my house for a celebration of life, liberty, and the pursuit of responsible intoxication." However right now more then his desire to help her Luke still wanted to get drunk. And he couldn't think of a better place or group of people to do it with

"All right." One spoken agreement for everybody.

"To the home cave!"

+++

Yeah so that’s it. My vision was Garcia was gonna try to set up Luke & Emily and perhaps try to recruit some of the team on her “side” while JJ was gonna try to do the same with Luke & Garcia and also try to get others on the team on her “side”. I also was trying to deal with Garcia not really dealing with her stress and constantly burying things down and Luke was gonna force her to deal with it.

#tv show: criminal minds #ship: garvez #garvez

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mmakehappy · 7 years ago

Text

2017

1. What did you do in 2017 that you’d never done before? i’ll try to do this chronologically again: so at the beginning of january one of my best friends left to study abroad in rome which was sad and i missed her a lot. i saw rory scovel do stand up. i took an animation class which was fun for the first few weeks until i failed it lmao. actually my classes from jan to march did not go so well tbh but whatever i made it through. my sister came to visit me the weekend before st paddys day which was super fun and then we saw panic which was soooooooo fuckin rad i love them still wow! i went home for spring break and visited a local winery w my dad which was a lot of fun and then a week later uhhh me and @carrot-gallery became gfs!!! and my whole frickin life changed bc i love her so much wow!! but then a week after that i turned 22 and spent my birthday alone! which i tried to pretend didnt make me sad but by the end of the day i was very sad about it and thats when my sweet gf called me to sing happy birthday and i sobbed on my couch and ill never forget that!!! so okay then spring quarter classes started and i was a part of depaul’s visiting artist series which was super cool... i met a lot of new awesome people (both at depaul and the industry ppl that were our guests!) and made some great friends in that class! i was a house manager and camera op which was super fun. i went to a screening of my fave professor’s short film which was also rad. i saw a ghost story at the chicago critics film festival, which was amazing. i saw idiocracy in 35mm and then mike judge did a q&a! the very next day i was house manager for depaul’s student film festival at the music box! i saw chris gethard do a live recording of beautiful/anonymous and then also do some standup, that was awesome. i saw day wave live!!! amazing! i spent an entire dystopian day dealing with megabus. that was hell! i sat at an outdoor amphitheater and even tho i couldnt really see him i got to listen to seu jorge sing david bowie covers and life was magical for a few hours. my sisters came up to visit me and we saw aladdin the musical and had our minds blown, it was soooo fun! i went to the chicago pride parade for the very first time but i went by myself and at one point i was sitting on the curb just crying! not a high point but still memorable. i won a ticket to an advanced screening of the big sick where kumail & emily were there to do a q&a after the movie.... had a fuckin blast OBVIOUSLY and then saw the movie 9 other times in various theatres. i also made it into a commercial FOR the movie i just loved it that much lmao! i moved into a new (and my current) apartment! lorde released melodrama and fucking murdered me in my own home. otherwise i had a pretty uneventful but anxiety filled summer bc of financial aid stuff so that really sucked. i saw good time w taylor and the safdie brothers were there to do a q&a and they were such interesting guys i could listen to them talk for hours honestly. my mom and sisters came up to visit me and we took our mom to her very first cubs game which was sooo so much fun and they won that day too!! it was awesome and we had a great time :) watched the eclipse (or tried to anyway!!) fall quarter classes started and i honestly kicked ass at them, i got on the deans list (i almost typed honor roll lmao i mean its basically the same) i hung out with ari again which was cool!! we went to the aquarium! me and taylor saw beach fossils which was honestly the most buckwild concert ive ever been to i think, it was good shit. i got jobs at AMC (which i have since quit lmao) and starbucks and left my job at the paint place which was bittersweet! me and taylor saw mbmbam live!!! so fun!! and we watched trolls that night and goofed on it so hard!! i went home for thanksgiving and found out my big sister is gonna have a baby this year!! :D i saw mike birbiglia do stand up! which was soooo incredible of course (except i felt bad bc my mom was supposed to come w me but she couldnt go! so i brought taylor lol) UMMMMM MY DAM GIRLFRIEND CAME TO CHICAGO TO VISIT ME AND STAYED FOR A WHOLE DANG WEEK AND IT WAS THE BEST THING EVER SHE MAKES ME SO HAPPY WE HAD SO MUCH FUN AND I MISS HAVING HER RIGHT NEXT TO ME EVERY SINGLE GOSH DANG DAY <3 ;_____; and that was my year!!

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? last year i said id like to read at least one book each month and watch at least 100 movies - i did neither! im keeping the movie resolution though bc cmon 100 movies should be EASY for a film major wtf am i doing!

3. Did anyone close to you give birth? no but it will happen in 2018!

4. Did anyone close to you die? not a person but we had to put down my sweet doggo, flash :(

5. What countries did you visit? still none :/

6. What would you like to have in 2018 that you lacked in 2017? More confidence that I actually deserve to be in college and that I can do this shit and I’m awesome <– that was my answer from last year and the year before but yeah. same. also money.

7. What dates from 2017 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? ummm march 25 when me and gf became gfs and also dec 17 when she came to visit :)

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? putting myself out there by doing VAS/Premiere, getting on the deans list for the first time since freshman year and then also getting a new job

9. What was your biggest failure? this summer i didnt do shit besides wallow and cry and it sucked!

10. Did you suffer illness or injury? nope

11. What was the best thing you bought? every movie ticket and the bras i bought for natalie ;-)

12. Whose behavior merited celebration? natalie’s because she’s amazing and works so hard!!!! and she can always cheer me up and im so in love w her

13. Whose behavior made you appalled? mine bc i could never just get my shit together and do my homework when i was supposed to :) < thats from last year but lmfao same!

14. Where did most of your money go? RENT, movie/event tix, food, in that order

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? THE BIG SICK, the new season of sv, p much all of the events that i listed in the first question lol

16. What song will always remind you of 2017? umm honestly probably any song from melodrama

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer? I’m a. happier, b. probably thinner? or maybe the same idk, and c. definitely DEFINITELY poorer

18. What do you wish you’d done more of? read and write and watch movies and write and read about movies

19. What do you wish you’d done less of? Spending money and also being bitter about everything for no reason <– last year and the year before that AGAIN and also same!

20. How did you spend Christmas? working at AMC which i hated every second of :)

21. Did you fall in love in 2016? yes with my amazing girlfriend @carrot-gallery

22. What was your favorite TV program? silicon valley, AMERICAN VANDAL, the good place, great british bake off

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? nah just politicians who like. actively want me to die lol

24. What was the best book you read? bitch,

25. What was your greatest musical discovery? mitski like why the fuck did i sleep on her..... tbh thats about it bc i still listen to the same music i did 10 years ago

26. What did you want and get? I wanted a steadier/better paying job and i have it!

27. What did you want and not get? idk i wanted to be financially stable on my own and i still dont have that

28. What was your favorite film of this year? ugh i hate this question! ok in no order: THE BIG SICK, GOOD TIME, A GHOST STORY, GET OUT, THE FLORIDA PROJECT

29. What one thing made your year immeasurably more satisfying? uhhh having my sweet girlfriend by my side each and every day

30. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2017? sometimes chic, always sweaty

31. What kept you sane? Sydney, my best friend in the entire world. (This was my answer from last year and the year before that and the year before that AND THE YEAR BEFORE THAT but it still holds true) also everyone in the sv discord chat still AND natalie of course of course

32. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? kumail nanjiani duhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, taika waititi, and martin starr always and probably more but i legit cant think of anyone rn lol

33. What political issue stirred you the most? yikes all of it. all of the issues (this was from last year but same lmao)

34. Who did you miss? i miss my dogs and my family and my girlfriend 35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2017. You can set goals for yourself and talk about it all you want but it’s nothing until you actually start working towards it and doing something about it. <– answer from last year and the year before that and the year before that, still true!! imma keep that. also idk just like, there are good days and super bad days and ive survived all of them so its just a reminder to myself that ill be okay.

36. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year. These days will all seem better in time Waiting on that hindsight

#2017 #personal #sorry that my answer to the first question is SO LONG but i did a lot this year!#and its fun to recap anyway #also this has been sitting in my drafts for a week lol so here ya go

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