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ff-imagines · 3 years

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Oh snap you're opened. Welcome back! Can you please do the nsfw alphabet for peking duck? I really like your writing!

Peking duck: nsfw alphabet

Minors dni xoxo

A - aftercare

The best at it, honestly. Might seriously cry a little afterwards lmao. You don’t have to ask for anything because he’s already thought ahead and is shoving everything you could need your way. It might get a little ridiculous with how careful he is with you, he doesn’t mean to baby you, he’s just terrified of hurting you. If you’re sore at all he feels incredibly guilty, even if there is a tiny part of him that twinges in pride when you remind him you’d asked for a rough treatment and, well, he’ll be damned if he doesn’t give you exactly what you asked so nicely for.

B - body part

Of yours, it’s more a question of what he doesn't like. If he had to make a choice, he’d say your stomach. It’s good to lay his head on it, and it’s one of the softest parts of your body so it’s nice and warm. He’d die before he admitted it but some nights he goes a bit harsher than usual, splaying his hand across your stomach and feeling how deep his cock is inside you as he thrusts- it drives him insane really.

He also loves your hands, always wants to be holding you hand, especaily during sex. Will pin you down in a loving way by lacing his fingers with yours above your head.

On himself? Definitely his hair. Playing with his hair and giving him a scalp massage makes him feel some type of way. Sit in his lap while you run your nails across his scalp and he’ll bury his nose in the crook of your neck and moan for you, whatever happens next is up to you babes xoxo

C - cum

It’s not a crazy amount but it’s pretty thick. You can’t tell me he doesn’t have a big ass breeding kink. What can he say, Peking Dad is a family man! Just the thought of cumming deep inside you has him thrusting all that harder. Beg him to cum inside you, I dare you. You’ll see a side to him that’s much more feral than you’ve ever seen this sweet man. Would 100% cum inside and buck into you just a bit longer to fuck any cum that’s slipped past his cock back inside you.

D - dirty secret

He wants to take pictures of you while in your blissed out state. He loves you so stupidly much, he’s already got tons and tons of pictures of you going about your daily life. He’s the type to see a cat asleep and go “what a rare moment I must capture it forever” and that stays true with his beloved. If you’d let him, he’d love to make some… home videos with you, ones he’d definitely come back to rewatch to the point where your whines are committed to memory like the lyrics to his favourite song.

E - experience

I’d say he’s not a green bean with sex. I don’t think he’s been around the block either. He’s probably opened up such intimacy with a few others before just to test the waters, but hasn’t really felt passionate about opening that part of himself back up for quite some time. He’d most likely fumble a bit to begin with as he recalls the motions.

F - favorite position

Whatever yours is! He’s the definition of a true switch, let him soft dom you or treat him how you like, it’s up to you!

If he had to pick, he’s most likely a sucker for when you’re on his lap. No matter if he’s in charge or not, he just loves to look up and see the way your face scrunches when he bucks and hits that one spot inside you that makes your mind vacate.

G - goofy

Not…. Really? He’s accidentally goofy by saying something super out of place during intimate moments or by fretting over something you wouldn’t even think to be worried over. You could have his cock buried so deep in your insides will feel like they’ve molded to the shape of his dick and he’d stop and ask if you remembered to turn the oven off lmao

H- hair

On himself he mostly trims to keep it simple but like, that’s it. He’s got a light happy trail that he doesn’t really trim since it’s not that thick, it doesn’t really bother him.

On you, he literally doesn’t care. Shave or don’t, he’s your personal cheerleader either way.

I- intimacy

It’s his expertise, your honour! He lives to be closer to you, learn more about your desires, what makes you happiest, please let him treat you good, he adores you so much, and precious things get treated like royalty in his hands. He commits your body and reactions to memory, almost like he’s taken a photograph of every single touch- and like I said….. if you let him…. he would take pictures ;)

J- jerk off

You’d think he’d only do it occasionally but he actually does it quite a lot. He thinks it’s healthy to release regularly, it’s better to cum now than have a weird spike of horniness in public. He’s probably considered the chance that you walk in on him, and he’s surprised by how much he wants that to happen. For him to be desperately close to the edge and for you to walk in and take over, him a deer in the headlights as you take control, he’s could probably cum to that fantasy alone, honestly.

K- Kinks

Well, obv a big ole breeding kink. The thought of cumming in your deepest parts has him frenzied beyond belief.

Idk if the taking pics thing is a kink but also… that ofc.

I think he’s also into sensory deprivation. Allow him to blindfold you, tie your hands behind you, let him take care of you. He’ll handle everything from here, sweet thing, all you have to do is keep moaning for him in such a pretty way.

He’s also, surprisingly, into masochism. He doesn’t care for sadism at all, he’d die before he left a mark on your perfect skin, however….. if you decided to roughly pull his head back by his hair and bite just a little too hard, you might find him bucking into you a little faster.

He’s probably thought a bit about cock warming, but surprisingly he doesn’t really want it to be…. “sexual” as much as he desires to be closer to you. You sitting in his lap, feeling you exhale against his neck with your arms wrapped around him, all the while is cock is buried deep inside you, it just sounds so intimate, and he finds himself craving to be that close to you often.

The biggest of all? Praise praise praise. Body worship as well. He’s literally always babbling about how gorgeous you are, how good you feel, how amazing you make him feel. Always encouraging and always admiring you, just like he does every single day in non sexual contexts, always sneaking in ways to remind you how much he adores you. Tell him about a certain part of your body you don’t feel confident in, he’s paying extra attention to making it known how perfect everything about you is. Everything you have, own, are, all of it. Peking is your number one fan, sit back let him remind you just why he finds you so lovely, you won’t regret it.

L- location

He prefers to be in a secluded area, he knows he’s loud and he’d be really embarrassed if anyone but you brought up the….. volume of his whines.

However, he’s very weak when it comes to your begging. If you're in a less than private location, he’ll most likely let you lead and just try to bite his knuckle to keep from crying out. It'd be soOoOo awful if you made a game out of trying to get him to break and whine out for you unmuffled as you play with him, oOoOoHhHh the horror >:)

M- motivation

He’s an old dad with an enormous you-shaped hole in his chest, just ask him and he’ll give everything he has to his name to you. You don’t need to wear that certain perfume he loves so much, you don’t need to breathe across his neck like that, you don’t need to run a finger down his spine so slowly, he’ll give you anything you ask for, please don’t tease him so much.

If you straight up ask him for sex, he’ll mostly lean towards soft service domming, if you choose to purposely rile him up, he’ll be in a much subby-er mood.

N- no

Like I’ve said, there really isn’t a sadistic bone in his body. He also doesn’t have literally any desire for humiliation kinks. He just doesn’t like it, giving or receiving. He’s a big ole simp with a big heart and it’s in the palm of your hands, please treat it nicely :’(

O- oral

P l s let him give you oral. He might not be an expert but he lives to make you feel good.

Afab readers…. He’ll most likely try to make you sit on his face at least once, please please he wants to feel your thighs against his head while he works his tongue on you.

Amab readers, he fuckin loves to rub his thumbs on your hips to keep you from bucking as he swallows your cock, he’ll open his mouth for you after you cum, swallow, and open his mouth again to prove he didn’t let a single drop go to waste.

As for receiving, phew boy does he love receiving. He cannot for the life of him figure out where to put his hands so it’s a frenzy of him grasping the sheets to biting down on his knuckle to placing a hand on your head. If you made him look down at you and lock eyes while his cock is in your mouth his soul would leave his body lmao

P- pace

Not very fast at all, he prefers to thrust deeper than should be possible. He really likes when you beg him to go faster, and as soft as his heart is, this is the only time he might withhold himself from giving into your begging for a bit, he just loves pulling out so slowly and watch you almost cry out for him to thrust back, deeper harder, faster, please, he’ll give into you eventually, just let him savour the feeling of you needing him badly enough to cry for a few more minutes.

Q- quickies

He prefers long, drawn out rounds, but if you really need some relief quickly, he’s not one to deny you. He will most likely give in, and later on in the night when you're back home and out of the public eye, suggest you two have a much more... thorough round as quick rounds just don’t satisfy him enough.

R- risk

Surprisingly…… he kinda likes the idea. The thought of someone, maybe even someone who’s been pining for you, to catch him in the act of making you beg and cry for him. Alternatively, making them watch you as you give your full attention to him, pleasure him, make them watch you love him instead of them. It riles him up in a way even he’s not used to.

S- stamina

He’s an old man, his refractory time is kinda long lmao. He prefers one really long round rather than multiple. He doesn’t mind or judge if you need a little more, and doesn’t mind giving you a few more orgasms with his tongue or hands.

T- toys

He doesn’t have any, but he’s open to the idea! Admittedly, he likes the idea on himself, like, really likes the idea. Give him a cock ring and watch him cry out as he begs for a break that he doesn’t actually want to take because the bliss you’re giving him is making him feel like jelly.

U- unfair

He's tried to edge and tease you before but he gave in so damn quick it was almost embarrassing for him. He just adores you, he lives to please you, even if you beg him not to give in and try to tease you he just can’t, his heart is so so squishy and he loves you very much dear, please let him treat you exactly how you beg to be treated.

Overstimming however….. he does it accidentally a lot, he just loves prolonging your pleasure, watching you squirm a bit as he forces a second orgasm out of your poor spent body.

V- volume

He’s very loud honestly. If you decide to dom him he talks a lot. He's got a bad babbling habit, words of adoration bleeding from his lips that get more and more incoherent the longer you toy with him. Play with him long enough and he’ll forget how to form words, letting out loud whines and he squirms under you. You might catch him attempting to cry out your name but the poor thing just can’t seem to form the right words.

If you let him top you he’s still throwing out every compliment he can think of and he still whines a lot, he likes to bury his face in your neck to muffle himself and listen to your moans. He lives to hear you come undone, but he can’t help being so loud, you’re just so warm and you feel so good :(

W- wild card

I think jealous sex will be more common than you actually think, Peking is just very quiet about the reason he’s suddenly a bit more handsy. He knows it’s not rational to worry about his place in your heart, but it just eats at him sometimes when he sees the way you blend in with others so easily while he just… doesn’t. If a stranger/friend is more overt about their flirting he will probably be more obvious about the jealousy burning through his veins. Even if he wasn’t prompted through jealously, pillow talk sometimes leans towards him venting his fears to you. Please praise him, tell him how much you love him, he needs it :’((((

X- X Ray

A lot bigger than average and a bit curved. He never considered himself to be out of the norm, or never really considered his cock to anything else than, just, “well, its there” I suppose. He does appreciate the curve a lot more now because it makes it easier to hit your weak point. He feels a bit of pride nestling into his chest if you cry about him being too big.

Y- yearning

Fairly often, but he doesn’t mind not acting on it. He can still function and do his work if he’s only surface level horny. Literally anytime you ask he’ll deliver with very slim exceptions. He’d like it to be a regular thing, since he really enjoys the intimacy, so maybe 3-4 times a week, 1-2 if you prefer it to be.

Z- zzz

Oh man he loves cuddling with you after sex. He also loves cuddling with you period but god he loves to the pillow talk with you in his arms, listening to your sleepy voice as your grip on him slowly loosens -but never lets go, as you succumb to sleep. He isn’t overly sleepy himself, instead choosing to close his eyes and comb through your hair, or run a thumb across your cheek if your hair isn’t a texture that can be combed through. Sleep will come to him eventually, he just likes savouring the warmth you bring him.

#food fantasy #food fantasy x reader #ff peking duck #peking duck #ff peking duck x reader #peking duck x reader

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failbaby · 3 years

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when was it implied that spencer was incested?

It was 4 x 07 that got me thinking about that (im adding the readmore both because this is long as hell and because it’s disturbing and im on desktop & can’t tag with tws until after i post :/ )

warnings for child sexual abuse, child murder, and incest below the cut

- I’m gonna start off by saying that Spencer has multiple dreams about “Riley Jenkins,” the boy who he’s convinced his father raped and killed, but in every one of these dreams, “Riley’s” face is completely concealed, and all we can see are his feet. In every single dream, he’s wearing the same black lace-up tennis shoes that Spencer has on all the time. (Derek also says in 4 x 06 that “if there’s a baby in your dream, that means the baby is you”)

- Spencer was dreaming about leeches covering his bare chest, which (an anon pointed this out to me) is obviously a portrayal of feeling something disgusting on your body. You could also interpret this as the residual gross feeling of knowing something horrible, obv, but the more literal explanation would be that he was remembering feeling something gross or wrong on his body.

- When he was under hypnosis (this is the really weird part) and was like. hypnotic-dreaming about being four, his father came up to him while he was in bed and sat down next to him, and he immediately started pretending to be asleep. (Which ik is not weird on its own, I definitely used to do that when my mom came in my room past my bed time.)

But instead of just leaving him alone and letting him fall asleep like my mom would, or I do when I’m taking care of kids, William goes, “I know you’re awake, Spencer.” Then he starts rubbing his arm (also obviously not weird at all on its own, but if you go and watch the camera work in context with everything else it seems a little strange) and says “daddy loves you, you know that?”

At this point, Spencer in the flashback is either crying or about to cry (I don’t remember), and present Spencer, grown-up Spencer, also on the verge of tears, says “I don’t want to be here.”

And the hypnotherapist tells him it’s okay, and he can go to the next morning, and that’s where all that stuff about the blood on the clothes is uncovered.

I thought that was kind of a disturbing scene, because there was no reason he’d be so freaked out and upset about his dad coming to say goodnight to him unless something happened, right? (That scene had nothing to do with Riley or the rest of the case.) And whatever happened was upsetting enough that he was looking to the next morning, when his father was burning the bloody clothes of another human being in the back yard, for comfort and refuge. ??

- The fact that he was so desperate to nail his father for molesting and murdering a boy his age when there was absolutely no evidence for that at all (and it like. Wasn’t even close to true) was also disturbing and out of typical character. Spencer explicitly says in the previous episode that he doesn’t believe in dream analysis, but as they get closer to the origins of the case, he flies further and further off the handle and literally starts trying to convince Derek to use his weird cryptic dreams and gut feelings as grounds for detaining William.

- He wanted all of that to be true. He wanted validation that his father was a violent pedophile. Penelope didn’t find any cp on William’s computer and he got upset. You’d think it would be a relief (she even says that), but he was obviously completely convinced that William was a violent, pedophilic offender and was angry that he was not finding a way to get justice.

- (I know he was upset about William abandoning him, but you’d have to believe (or know) that he’s capable of some really horrible, horrible things to be genuinely, deeply convinced, with absolutely no evidence at all, that your father raped and killed a first grader)

- I’m totally convinced that William was abusive in some way, because Derek and Emily both mention that Spencer (of eidetic memory fame) doesn’t remember his childhood at all, and we see in Revelations that his memories kick in literally the moment William walks out the door. He repressed all of his memories of that man??

- I’m like. 60% sure they were trying to imply that William had molested him and he didn’t exactly remember, but that he knew what his father was on some level and was seeking justice for what happened to him. He was so worked up when they couldn’t find anything because he knew that meant that William was going to get away with hurting him

#ask #characters #tw incest #tw csa #also i didn't want to drag derek into this one but i do wonder if having derek there/having him yell for derek when he was covered in the l #with how derek was also a survivor #memoriam

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lemony-snickers · 3 years

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20 [Fanfic Writer] Questions Game

i one thousand percent stole this from @depressedhatakekakashi when i saw it and sat down to answer them all now. i’ll put the whole thing under the cut because it’s l o n g, lol, but i’ll also tag a few folks if they’d like to play along. i’m only going with folks i know have relatively active ao3 accounts off the top of my head. if you wanna play, feel free to steal this shit same as i did. 😂

@myaekingheart @whatshernameis @chemmerson @kakashiswilloffire @kakashi-tsukuyomi

no pressure, obvs, but this was kind of fun! <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

34 + 17 = 51 (plus there’s a few on here i haven’t copied over yet; should probs get on that, lol)

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

141,984 + 379,165 = 521,149, most of it from this year.

3. How many fandoms have you written for, and what are they?

4 – naruto, cowboy bebop, boku no hero academia, justified

4. What are your Top Five fics by kudos?

long fic (just reached 500 – WHAT EXCUSE ME WUT – yesterday) ours (206) nice to meet you (204) when love blooms (159) first (156)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

almost every one. i started in a pretty small fandom and really appreciated the two consistent readers i had who commented on nearly every chapter, so i got in the habit and sort of stuck with it.

6. What fic have you written with the angstiest ending?

idk, i am honestly such a wuss and i think i almost always end with Happiness, lol. maybe what cannot be forgiven? i also have a one-shot that’s sort of sad under my other pseud, but honestly it’s just people growing old, so that’s different.

7. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

i am gonna go with clan, i think.

8. Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you’ve written?

nope. never even wrote an au until january. before that, i wouldn’t even read a fic if it wasn’t strictly adherent to canon. i've grown this year, ya’ll! XD

9. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

no, i don’t think so. i've def been pretty lucky in that i've only ever received VERY FEW slightly rude comments, mostly just nitpicky stuff. definitely no actual hate.

10. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

lol, nope, never even heard of it…

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

i don’t think so. my stuff isn’t popular enough for such sordidness, lol.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

i have not. yet.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

izuocha, probs. never been a super shipper or anything, but they’re very adorable and wholesome and i love them very much.

15. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

honestly? the college au that began my entire smut journey, lol. i basically rewrote a scene from a kakashi/reader fic that made me BIG MAD and thought about how i would write my own college au, but… it hasn’t coalesced yet and i think it’s very clear that one-shots are much more my wheelhouse than multi-chapter fics, unfortunately.

16. What are your writing strengths?

i am gonna go with what i've heard from others because i cannot evaluate myself, lol. i've had people compliment my character development and portrayal of relationships, and i hope that’s true.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

P A C I N G. i will gladly spend 14 pages on a single cup of coffee and then .02 on an action scene. partially because i don’t think i'm very good at describing action and partially because i just have no idea what i'm doing, lolol.

18. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

i haven’t done it much. i have written characters who speak another language, but the story is always told from the perspective of someone who doesn’t understand it. i think i threw in 1 or 2 russian words once, but it was all very obvious from context what they meant, so i didn’t have to provide a translation or anything.

19. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

technically, i posted exactly one chapter of my naruto longfic before anything else. but then it sat untouched for over a year while i wrote 100k+ about u.s. marshalls, lol.

20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

oof. that's a toughie. probably a fantasy au izuocha one-shot. but of the lemony variety, i think i'll go with the wait is over because i wrote that shit fully for myself, lol.

#lemony snippets #but i'm a fanfic writer!#tag game

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nikkiruncks · 2 years

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it's wild to me how kc fans expect klaroline to prioritize a past brief relarionship/flirtation over their separate children/families which are clearly a priority to them. i love their interactions in the originals (because i ship them obvs) but it was fantastic and realistic and right how they didn't just run off into the sunset together completely reckless like fandom seemed to expect them to. (also i always disliked the fact that people will hate hope and caroline's twins for simply existing as if every single character should be expendable to serve the kc agenda lol).

and can we just talk about the fact that tyler had to leave caroline - he had to, for his own sanity (which kc fans berated him for because pursuing vengeance for your dead mother is somehow a terrible thing to do i guess?), which is what made the forwood breakup so great and in character even if it hurt like hell as a shipper. caroline made peace with klaus's arrival into mf, all that happened afterwards, whatever weird friendship dynamic they had (enough to invite him to MF which was great for me because i like him even though it was also weird that klaus and stefan would have more of a desire to go to high school graduation than tyler, a literal eighteen year old boy who has his whole life ahead of him, and rebekah, who never got to experience graduation ONCE as opposed to stefan's pathetic ass who attended graduation needlessly like. 17 times), and even grew to accept and like him to some extent, but tyler on the other hand was thoroughly ruined by klaus, and he can't just accept and move on the way caroline did after he was victimized. it was important to him to reclaim agency and get real closure, for klaus to have comeuppance, and i love that for his character!

but also people act like he just heartlessly left caroline without a goodbye when that is clearly not true. it deeply hurt him to have to leave her behind which was why he paused when she asked him not to leave!!!!!!! he wanted to give her a magical college dance and spend time together and reinforce their bond but this is clearly a priority for him. he needs to live his life without 'permission' from klaus, his tormenter and oppressor, and people tend to villify him for this. from caroline's perspective it also makes sense that she feels abandoned and hurt because a lot of her insecurities come from being 'left.' and this is a recurring pattern for forwood which is what adds to their angst and tragedy - tyler keeps having to leave her (s2, s3, and now in s5), but he always comes back, and he leaves for both their benefit/to preserve their relationship.

Yes like if I never watched tvd and didn’t know the actual context, I'd think that Tyler left left without a word and caroline just fucked some random guy and that that's what he was mad about. I mean it still baffles me to this day that he gets shat on for choosing his MOTHER and FREEDOM over care. I mean don't get me wrong, I felt bad for her and my heart broke for her, but Tyler was not in the wrong for wanting his abuser to pay. I mean he killed him, forced him to be a hybrid, made him do things he didn't want to do, killed his MOTHER (his only family he had left), killed his pack, and ran him out of town and he's just supposed to be okay with that because he chose not to be petty for a day. As Caroline would say: "seriously". Honestly you can feel bad for care without shitting on Tyler. Tbh what I find interesting about the forwood conflicts is that I can see both sides and understand them (expect for 2 of their conflict but that's a whole other story). And I also hate when kc'ers bring up that "he's always leaving her" because that's not true and they don't even look at context. The first time, they weren't exactly on the best of terms and he was just respecting her space, the second time he left to break the sirebond, the third time he didn't even have a choice. Like Klaus FORCED him out of town for shits and giggles. And the last time he left to AVENGE HIS MOTHER. Like honestly Ty can't catch a break from parts of the fandumb.

#fcrbescaroline #answered #tyler deserved better #forwood deserved sm better #anti klaus #anti klaroline stans #anna ❤️‍🔥

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vasillisa · 3 years

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Be Careful Where You Get Your Information.

For transparency’s sake, I’m Vasillisa (#2460) on Mweor. I’d like to start out by saying that life is a complex series of choices and consequences. The choice(s) you make today may not always seem like the right one tomorrow, or next year even- and as humans, we are all going to fuck up sometimes.

I usually don’t leave my ‘lurker’ status but you bet your sure ass I will be when someone is harassing one of my friends. Every single individual in Cat Party is an incredible human being. Have they fucked up before? Duh. Haven’t we all? But I’ve never seen a single person there not learn from their mistakes or strive each and every day to better themselves and their lives. That being said, I’d like to shed a light on some recent accusations. What Zanna/Alyria is spreading couldn’t be farther from the truth. Nobody told her to commit suicide/ mocked her for being suicidal. She will speak until she’s blue in the face about how we are villains and how a handful of screenshots she took OUT OF CONTEXT are the reason for all her mweor troubles. It simply isn’t true. The cryptic screenshots she has managed to shove in anyone’s face that will listen were actually a group of very concerned friends voicing our opinion and expressing hope that she could get help. We didn’t damn her for being mentally ill and none of us ever would- as many of us struggle with our own issues daily. Lysa is one of the strongest, most uplifting and understanding people I have ever met. She’s helped me through so much and is one of the people I’d say has kept me going through some of my darkest times. I owe a lot of my successes and triumphs to the collective of Cat Party’s ongoing support over the ~3ish years I have known them. They are genuinely good, decent people. Be careful who’s word you take at face value- especially directed at the newer, younger players. Some of us have a long history that isn’t always apparent during first interactions- and not everything is always black and white. I personally recommend you make a conscious effort to get to know some of us before villainizing and wishing misfortune on our homes and lives. (obv. if you are racist, homophobic, transphobic, etc. its a different story) but the cover of the book typically doesn’t reveal the true story inside. Be nice, spread positivity, grow as a person and an individual- don’t conform to the crowd. EDIT: I wanted to qive a quick clarification that this post isn’t directly about the blacklist, rather Zanna/Alyria dredging up old drama WITH the surfacing of the blacklist and attempting to pin it on anyone and everyone. Stay classy yall and for everyone’s sake stay aware.

#mweor #not mweor related

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always-la-belle-epoque · 5 years

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hi what is mash and why do you love it so much because i need to know if i need to love it too thanks

Hello, anon! It took a bit because I wanted to put time into my answers, so here you are!

What Is M*A*S*H:

M*A*S*H is a tv show about doctors/nurses stationed at a Mobile Army Surgical Hospital (M*A*S*H) unit on the frontlines of the Korean War. The show focuses on the medical staff as they desperately try to save the lives of young soldiers. Many of the doctors are draftees and they are faced with trying to cope with the horror of a war they want no part of and that is the absolute antithesis to their professional calling. They fight against death every day, struggle against military bureaucracy, and try to keep their sanity. Often that deep stress is released in humor, practical jokes, and wildly unmilitary antics, but the true costs and realities of war are never treated lightly. I’ve never seen another show that can make me laugh so hard and then turn on a dime to make me cry just as deeply a second later. The show is a beautiful examination of human nature, heart, found family, loss, helplessness, despair, exhaustion, humanity, and hope,.

M*A*S*H ran for 11 years, from 1972-1983 and the finale, Goodbye, Farewell and Amen, is still the most-watched television broadcast in history (the NYC sewer nearly faced collapse because people would all flush the toilet at the same time during commercials, and the streets were totally empty of cars as over half the country, 150+ mil people, watched the finale live together all at the same time. Can you imagine?!). Plus, it’s been in continuous syndication for 45 years which is impressive. M*A*S*H is for all generations, it resonates far beyond the era in which it was made, or which it was made about.

Why Do I Love M*A*S*H So Much (in general):

I don’t think there is another show out there in the history of the world that has written such narratively wonderful, deeply moving character arcs. I don’t know if there’s another show out there where the characters grow so much from their relationships with one another. Or a show that depicts masculinity in such a healthy, tender way. It is normal on M*A*S*H for male characters to: Cry. Hug. Tuck each other in. Hold hands. Perform emotional labor. Actively listen. Dance together. Sleep with teddy bears (and not have it be a joke). Admit they were wrong. Change and grow from being wrong. Etc, etc.

And while Major Margaret Houlihan is the only female lead, her character arc is the most beautiful of any character I have ever watched or read. The show doesn’t start out particularly feminist, but it definitely ends that way (both male and female characters evolve here and it’s wonderful). And if more tv shows had characters half as complex as Margaret Houlihan, tv would be a whole lot more interesting, and women would be a whole lot farther along toward equality, imo.

Why Do I Love M*A*S*H So Much (the personal):

I was 15 or 16 when I started watching M*A*S*H. I was going through a very dark time in my home life. But my Mom would usually have M*A*S*H on while making dinner or just after. It was their weird time of day where it seemed like a truce between us. Sometimes I’d even sit all 5’8 of my gangly teenage body on her lap and we’d just watch like that with her arms around me (which given that things were darkly terrible the rest of the time it was like being a small kid again in a way I really needed). We’d talk about the characters. We’d talk about the stories. We both loved Margaret Houlihan (it’s interesting that Margaret has the most valuable traits I learned from my Mom - things I like most about her and am grateful she taught me despite all the bad stuff).

Soon I was racing home after school and jamming in a blank VHS so that I could record each ep. I’d cross reference between tv guide and IMDB to try to see if any eps that I hadn’t seen yet would be on so I could record them for my collection. I made an elaborate cataloging system because they weren’t shown in order! And some eps were shown only rarely!! (I’m only 28, it amazes me that this was how things were not that long ago lol).

Anyway, the DVD box set came out and I saved up alllllll my $ for it. Thank goodness, because then I got sick and for a few years the M*A*S*H characters were the most consistent and truest friends I had. The show is deeply personal for me. I can watch it over, and over, and over. It makes me laugh, and weep, and cheer. It’s like having friends. Like having family.

Should You Love M*A*S*H too?

I want you to love M*A*S*H. I want everyone to love M*A*S*H! And M*A*S*H holds up. It’s still radically progressive. It’s still - in this time where North Korea is a frequent headline, where we have a government we do not trust, in a world where we have been at war since 2001 - deeply relevant.

Here’s the thing though: it was made in the 70s, about events in the 1950s, and this is 2019 tumblr-land. You’ve all read the roasts about lack of critical thinking skills on this website and ability to contextualize, and those posts are unfortunately not wrong. And the world has changed - and changed for even better than what was, at the time, truly radical! Even terms that were the liberal, pc term in the 70s have changed now and are not liberal or pc anymore which for the 2019 watcher might raise eyebrows. But the show is extremely pointed about calling out racism, homophobia, sexism, military fetishism, colonization, etc. I think maybe the only other show I can think of that goes so hard at dogged and relentless political call outs would be One Day at a Time. So I feel protective of M*A*S*H because in 50 years maybe we will look back at ODaaT and say yikes about certain things, though that feels crazy to say now.

If you do want to watch, here’s my advice (pull down your pants and slide on the ice (sorry, omg M*A*S*H jokeee)):

Do not start with S1. Start with S4, or S5 even. For one thing, there are some cast changes at the start of S4 so you get intro-ed to everyone again in “Welcome to Korea pt 1 & 2” and “Change of Command.” It’s a really good starting point to see a lot of characters on the brink of change. Don’t get me wrong, I still really love S1-3 but the characters haven’t grown yet. I love going back because I know them so well, but if you’re just meeting them, I recommend getting to know them in the middle of their journey, watch them evolve, and then go back and see where they started. And I think Col. Potter/BJ really elevated the tone of the show.

Because M*A*S*H is an older tv show, most people who love M*A*S*H never watched the show in order because we could only watched it in syndication! And you don’t really need to watch in order! In fact, CBS had the final call for episode order so sometimes even the air order is different than the writing, filming, intended order. Also, because they had 11 years of content over a 3 years of war, the show itself isn’t chronological. Due to probability (there are just more Potter/BJ eps) I saw more S4+ eps when I was first watching the show so again that’s my newbie preference. Now that it’s on Hulu (and remastered OMG) it might be tempting to watch in order, but really do recommend skipping around or at least starting later in for sure. You’ll learn context as you go (recs below). Then once you get the characters and their arcs it’s suuuuper fascinating to watch in order.

Fight me: Is everyone bisexual on this show??! Yes, yes they are. This is where I go full 2019 tumblr-brain, lol, but looking back I think it’s one of the reasons I loved it before I understood myself. It’s gentle, tender, pretty wavy. Alan Alda’s Hawkeye Pierce is, like, arguably canonically bi, like I even wonder if he was intentionally written/played that way on the dl. It’s pretty blatant?? And don’t even get me started on Margaret Houlihan. Godddddddd.

On that note, and maybe you will fall over, but Margaret and Hawkeye are my actual, #1, forever OTP. Which is weird for you, dear readers, I’m sure, as I run a v strict wlw blog and I’m very proud about that. But broken people who heal and change and grow because of the other is my tea, jam, and bread (”crackers and jam! too bad!” ;) ), and so far the writing of other characters and relationships hasn’t a hope of even coming into the range of depth these characters have (obvs not just wlw ships, all other mlw ships are The Worst as well, we’re all doomed, why does tv suck). But anyway, I would take them over any ship any day of the week goombye (but also….shipping Margaret is kinda like….not the point of Margaret Houlihan).

It’s worth noting that M*A*S*H has a character named Maxwell Klinger who wears a dress to try to get out of the army via a Section 8 (previously known as a “psycho”) discharge (remember lgbtq was still classified as a mental illness, smh). Obviously, this is potentially triggering. And, obviously, not okay in today’s world. To me the show does call out that it is the policies/laws/politics that are crazy, not Klinger. I think there are still some fairly modern ideas in his portrayal in that anyone who treats him like he is crazy, or is disrespectful, is very pointedly shown to be bigoted/an antagonist. Klinger is excellent at his job, brave, loyal, true, and that’s all anyone who is a protagonist cares about (and I do think they try to show to the extend they could during the time it aired that even if Klinger were not doing it for a discharge, they would respond the same way). Fwif, imo, Klinger isn’t played as a one note joke for wearing dresses, in fact, to an extent, he does wear them utterly sincerely. He loves, deeply loves, clothes and fashion because loving something gives him something to live for. It becomes his passion, not a gag. The gag is that Klinger will do anything to get out of the war through any available loophole he hears about (having an imaginary pet camel, eating 10 sausages in a single day, eating a jeep, trying to get into West Point aka join the military to get out of the military), etc. His comrades in arms treat him very sincerely and are very protective. Early on, a jeep comes in with wounded and Radar pulls Klinger away from the blood, “careful, you’ll get your dress dirty” in the most serious, sweet way. Col Potter is always very serious and sincere about telling Klinger when one of his dresses is a fav, and Klinger positively glows. When Klinger has to trade his dress collection to local women in exchange for shelter for the wounded during a bug out, Col. Potter, regular army in his 3rd war, tells Klinger (who is in tears) that it’s the finest act of bravery he has ever seen (and he means it). When Margaret desperately wants to look pretty and Klinger pulls out one of his best frocks and helps her dress in it - Margaret who grew up in combat boots wanting a crew cut - it’s pretty emotional (and I bawl when he gives her the wedding dress, goddd). As for Klinger himself, he’s one of my favorite characters. He has the biggest heart and I love him (and yes, I might feel differently if I had a different life experience than I do - that is why I’m flagging this as something that might not be for everyone, or might be trigger - because history already is triggering, and not everyone might be as moved by him as I am).

If you’re a 30 Rock fan you will know the star Alan Alda as Milton Greeen, Jack Donaghy’s father, and if you love Beauty and the Beast you will know that the actor who voiced Cogsworth is a major (lol pun) character in S6-11! But that’s all crazy to me because they are always M*A*S*H, first and forever, and always in my mind! I can’t believe they’re all in their 80s now, or that so many of them have passed. :( They are truly my whole heart, my family, my home.

If you do want to watch, recommend you start with the following eps (omg this list is long but it feels so short):

Welcome to Korea pt 1 + 2 (s4)

Change of Command (s4)

Aid Station (s3)

Death Takes a Holiday (s9)

Carry on, Hawkeye (s2)

Bug Out pt 1 + 2 (s5)

Dear Sigmund (s5)

Period of Adjustment (s8) *my first ep ever :,)

The Bus (s4)

Sometimes You Hear the Bullet (s1)

Tuttle (s1)

Crisis (s2)

O.R. (s3)

5 O'Clock Charlie (s2)

The Nurses (s5)

The Interview (s4)

Movie Tonight (s5)

Abyssinia, Henry (s3)

Hepatitis (s5)

Your Hit Parade (s6)

Peace on Us (s7)

Eye for a Tooth (s7)

Old Soldiers (s8)

Life Time (s8)

Stars and Stripes (s8)

Hey, Look Me Over (s11)

There’s a million more things I could say about the show. I feel like I haven’t summarized it justly. If anyone wants to chime in with why they love M*A*S*H, what your fav ep is, etc, please do :)

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jq37 · 5 years

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Ok thoughts on Six on Broadway fresh out of the theater (2/16; 3PM show):

First and most importantly it totally lived up to the hype that I've been trying and failing to not build up in my head since last year. And this might be the hypest audience I've ever been in. Everyone in line was talking like they already knew what was up and I saw a good amount of people in like crowns and space buns and stuff. And every single time a Queen got burned during the show, everyone “OOOOOOH”-ed like we were on Wild ‘N Out or something.

While I was in line, I’m 95% sure I saw Toby Marlow sprint past me and then return 10 minutes later with a slice of pizza.

I got a pin and I asked the dude for an Aragon pin and he was like, "Is that queen of the castle?" Like lol buddy welcome to your first weekend working at Six.

Before the show starts, they play pop songs but I assume with the keyboard set to organ or harpsichord sounds. The two songs I recognized were Truth Hurts and Havana.

If you’re here looking for intel on the seating situation, I had seats second from the top and way to the left and I still saw everything fine (and I am not a tall person) so I wouldn’t worry too much about where you’re sitting.

Like I said before, it's such a hype show. Like even if you've heard the soundtrack or seen the show through ~other means~ I promise you're not ready.

Right when the show starts, they project out these Tudor rose projections into the audience which is a nice touch. It’s such a nice looking set in general with the lights in the back and the band up on stage. I really like how highlighted the band members are in this show as compared to other shows I’ve seen. It’s a hard job and I bet it’s nice to get the props.

“Live in Consort” is the best pun in Six because it’s a reach but said with such confidence that you have to give to to her.

"Donde esta my crown?" is already a funny line but it’s even funnier when you picture two British 20-somethings conceiving of the line.

Any time Aragon waves at the crowd, which is a lot, she Princess Diary waves which I love.

A lot of people have had a lot to say about the American accents and it's honestly ridiculous. Like, we're already taking these historical figures so out of their original context that could hardly be the straw that breaks the camel's back. Like, Kathrine Howard can sing a Brittney Spears song but it has to be in a British accent? Come on. And I actually think some songs (like No Way and Get Down in particular) sound a little more natural in an American accent considering the artists they’re taking inspiration from.

I can’t believe they do this show without a break. This is like 90 minutes of pure cardio. It’s, “I’m getting exhausted watching you,” choreo. They didn’t stagedoor after and, tbh, good. Go lay down before the 8pm show please. That’s 100% what I’d be doing.

I have heard the Anne Boleyn intro before but it’s a million times funnier watching her actively peace out as she’s being talked about and then take a selfie and quickly stash her phone before the song starts.

They really scrubbed as many of the “mate”s out of the show as possible which I get but I feel like I would have just left them alone since it’s such a common British-ism that I feel like people know.

I was led to believe that in “Wearing Yellow to a Funeral,” Anne is cut off from calling Aragon a massive bitch but lol that was def a hard C and not a B they stopped her after.

“What a weekend,” is also a killer line imo.

Still wild that Elizabeth is never mentioned in this show except indirectly when Anne says when she had a daughter Henry killed her.

Heart of Stone has def grown on me since I first heard it and Abby Mueller is obv amazing but it’s still weird to hear after a song about how this dude literally decapitated someone (“You’ve got a good heart?” Jane, what? Citation needed) and I think it’s good that it’s basically undercut immediately by the, “Severed head,” line by Anne. Also, I lowkey spent most of the song preparing for the cut to Haus of Holbein.

I was not prepared for the cut to Haus of Holbein.

Literally, I could not wipe the stupid grin off my face during the entirety of Cleves’ pre-HoH speech because I knew exactly the nonsense that was about to happen and it still surpassed my expectations.

If I didn’t already know that Boleyn’s line was, “the whole of the Holy Roman Empire,” there is no way I would have understood any of that. The German accents during that scene truly do sound like they were told, “Do literally whatever,” and it’s so funny.

Cleves’ throne rising out of the stage so she can sit in it is such a Moment.

Brittney Mack’s operatic riff or whatever it’s called during the slow-mo part of Get Down is so, so, so fill the room amazing. Man it was so good. Also, I 100% did not realize that on the “take my fur” line, they breakaway rip her little jacket off and it’s this cool sparkly bodice piece under. Based on audience reaction, neither did they.

I feel like everyone always talks about Boleyn’s energy in this show and they should because they’re right but--speaking for the Broadway cast--she’s for sure second to Cleves in terms of raw energy.

During the roast, I think to Aragon, Howard strokes her cheek with the back of her hand which is super funny, as is her shaking her fists at the sky after the, “When will justice be served,” line to Jane.

Not a Surprise: I also Wasn’t Ready for All You Wanna Do.

AYWD is the song I was most curious to see audience reaction to (w/ HoH being a close second) because, you know, it’s an ostensibly fun song except that it’s awful. But I think the mood of the audience kinda followed Howard’s. When she was joking around, everyone kinda felt like they had permission to joke around too--like there’s a part in the choreo that happens more than once where they put her hands on her and she shrugs them off and the first time it happened there was a laugh but when it happened again during the third verse when she’s clearly Over It and dancing in a really rote and exhausted way, no laugh.

(Sidenote: The juxtaposition of Cleves and Howard--arguably the most and least successful Queens--is always to interesting to me. The placement of such a “I’m so Dope,” song next to a, “My life was trash,” song. And, now having seen it, there’s a part in the Get Down choreo where all the other queens have their hands all over Cleves in a hyping her up kinda way and, as, in contrast, Howard is getting touched constantly in AYWD and it’s Bad.)

(Double sidenote: During verse four of AYWD, there’s a part where everyone walks in front of Howard and they duck so they don’t block her and Andrea like basically didn’t duck at all. It was lowkey super funny).

Anyway, the breakdown was rough. By which I mean extremely good but rough to listen to. Like, I know it’s a part of the song so I knew it was coming but I’m so used to the studio version that listening to her full on sob through the last chorus was A Lot. You could feel the air sucked out of the room. Huge props to Sam Pauly.

So, iirc, in the West End version of the show, post Howard’s song is the fight which dissolves into literal hair pulling/having to break people up. In this version, it doesn’t got that far. They get to comparing miscarriages and the Cleves breaks it up and tells Parr it’s her turn. Then, she gets an intro to an upbeat sounding song that we never actually hear because she can’t bring herself to sing it. Then she goes into the same (or at least a similar) speech about, “We shouldn’t do this,” which leads into IDNYL.

When Katherine does the, “Katherine de Valois, I mean I don’t know,” line, Cleves looks at her like, “Bitch what?”

When Boleyn gives the, “Everyone notices that Jane can’t dance,” line, I didn’t catch Jane’s reaction like I wanted to because Aragon immediately breaks into a sidebar with her like, “Right? That’s totally true.”

During Jane’s verse in Six, everyone is actually pretty down with the Tudor Von Trapps line and then she says Royaling Stones and loses everyone.

I didn’t realize that they did the same couples choreo during the Six that they do for Ex-Wives but I like that a lot. Very circular.

It is extremely hard to not sing during a show like Six, especially once you’ve conditioned yourself for the past six or so month to start spitting out lyrics the second you hear any of these songs start. I really really hope they have Sing-A-Long tix at some point because I am willing to shell out for that and I think a lot of people in that audience would have as well.

Some random dude at a light say me holding my playbills and asked how I liked the show because he’d good things which, if an omen for the show’s prospects, is a good one. Opening weekend is probably not a fantastic gauge of show longevity because of course all of the hypest fans would be out now but if it can keep up this energy then man they’re gonna have a hit (well, a further hit).

#six the musical #six broadway #personal #if you have questions feel free to hit me up but my musical memory is so bad. i just internalize the experience and then forget the details

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underwaterwoods · 5 years

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so i saw the star war

spoilers ahoy

i guess this is just gonna be random bullet points

* i actually feel pretty chill about it. yay for being spoiled. also like.... if you ignore the ridiculous stuff there’s actually a lot to have fun with in this one. i don’t know how i’ll feel about it once i’ve processed it more. i just know i had fun while watching it, which i know isn’t true for everybody. i totally understand the negativity - it all makes sense to me. i’m just glad i sort of.... FORCED myself to have enough distance to just go in like ‘i’M PrepArED fOr wHAtEveR’

*i did like all the jumping around between locations in the first half and how ben would show up everywhere rey was. what a ‘you’re everywhere i go’ pairing. /chef’s kiss/. also having the different locations gives a sense of spaciousness (even if it’s all happening over a short period of time) which i missed in tlj.

*one of the things that gave me the most joy as the hux thing ??? X’’’D it was EXACTLY like that ‘the farce awakens’ ep where hux LITERALLY JOINS THE RESISTANCE cuz he can’t stand kylo. like what kind of fanfic...... how do the hux fans out there feel? (i really love the hux fans they’re a great bunch XD). shame that he was gone right after though.

* i actually enjoyed the trio dynamic? like i get the desire to move away from ‘trio mentality’ but the rey/poe tension with finn as mediator was fun. and finn and poe as joint generals? adorable. shame that the whole finn/poe thing got a bit clouded by.... stormpilot baiting and rose erasure and all the things... Also i’m not anti any character - i like zorii - but.... let poe stay a gay icon? i guess he can still be a queer icon it’s all good i’m down for whatever.

*speaking of finn.... loved seeing more of his humour back. didn’t love that there was no unpacking of how he feels taking out stormtroopers. but loved the found family of jannah and the other ex-stormtroopers. i feel like that gave SOME resolution/depth to finn’s origins. and finn being a non force user but seemingly super attuned to the force and its ways? i can roll with that.

*more speaking of finn... i wonder what they were doing with the ‘thing he wants to tell rey that he never gets to tell rey’. seems like an obvious ‘i love you’ thing. but at the same time we got reylo (/basks in that for a second/). it feels to me like throwing a bone to the finnrey people? like they didn’t get it in this movie but it could be a thing in the future? regaurdless, i did like how finn and rey were very connected and back to that loving friendship they had in tfa. we never quite got the ‘you have a force bond with the supreme leader?!!’ conversation but we got.... SOME conversation.

* speaking of the supreme leader... kinda love that we got renperor AND ben solo TM. i prefer to view ben more holistically (he is both ‘ben’ and ‘kylo’) but i get that making them two distinct identities was a helpful shortcut of sorts. he could ‘kill’ kylo and switch to being ben in a single scene. i always prefer Soft Boi Ben but if we were gonna get Bad Boy Kylo i’m glad they established it right out the gate. it was like ok, this is what to expect; this is where we’re at with this character.

*ben with his costume change at the end....... omg. gave me BIG smuggler!Ben vibes. urgh, give me all the AUs. ben deserves more.

*the amount of swagger when he was fighting the KOR

*idk i feel like i’m not even touching on the big stuff. this was just a ‘get all my side thoughts out of my system’ post.

*adam’s smile after the kiss though......... ... /the most beautiful thing in this world/

*truly iconic that people were right about the strategic, covert introduction of force healing via baby yoda like one month before tros.

*oh yeah it was wILD that so much of the imagery from the trailers/tv spots etc was in like the first five mintues of the movie ??? i totally assumed the ‘i have been every voice you’ve ever heard inside your head’ moment would be climactic rather than right up front

*oh yeah the vader mask.... that didn’t really mean anything in the end then did it?

* re: ben’s death. maybe it’s because i was braced for it but in some ways it’s the best way he could have gone. he was definitely happy and reunited with the light - both through love of rey and of his family. hIGHKey could have done with ben’s force ghost also appearing at the end? the only good thing about not seeing it is.... LF deciding to retcon his death ? ??XD obs they’re not gonna but if you want a crackpot silver lining there it is.

*what exactly does rey’s future look like, may i ask?

* oh yeah, Passing The Saber Through The Force. maybe my favourite moment. the force bond as a bare concept is so romantic to me i would watch a whole trilogy just exploring the magic system of that - it’s limitations and possibilities.

* i do like that jj developed the visual style of the bond. we got to see them occupying the same space, the way each of them would be seeing the other (’can you see my surroundings, i can’t see yours, just you’)

*i miss that rian johnson sound editing on the bond though..... god, the iNTIMACY of the tlj bond scenes....

*’i DID want to take your hand’

*also just the word choice of ‘take your hand’/ ‘i offered you my hand’. it’s extremely marriage.

*there was also a moment in the hanger when ben was like ‘we’re one’ basically? he was saying it in the context of rey’s lineage but still...............the validation. one soul.

*palps was like ‘you live and die together’ which made me REALLY think of skytalkers podcast. obviously assumed they would both have to LIVE together but.... /deep sigh/

*blah this could go on forever i’ll add more later

edit #1:

* OH YEAH! reverse anidala was such a thing! why did it have to be SO reverse anidala though? X’D instead of taking her life, he gives her his own. (i know it’s not clear anakin totally killed padme etc etc but ya feel me)

* ok i hate that ben died obvs obvs but, taking that for what it is, it was very romeo and juliet. i kinda love just the imagery of it. like... the physical blocking/choreography of adam getting daisy into his arms, holding her, then he falls and it’s her holding him. the way she catches his neck. really reminded me of the smoothness of the bridal carry. and rey’s flexed foot in that moment of shock. love the body language. back to that kind of ‘’staccato’’ rey of tfa days.

edit #2:

*lololol @ LF trying to establish how ‘bad’ kylo is by having him kill a bunch of people in the beginning. it was just.... Hot.

edit #3:

* rose deserves better. obviously. she looked so good though. i like that she had some moments with connix too.

* ben called han ‘dad’......

*ben standing there, overlooking the waves, with his leG EXTENDED BEFORE HIM. wanderer above a sea of fog. wanderer above a sea of foggg.

* rey having compassion for the snake thing. we been knew. kinda nice to have it in there. obviously good set up for ~later force healing shenanigans~

* OH YEAH OH YEAH. i kept thinking about atla. i know people have been making comparisons to it from the start and i’ve been DEEPLY INTO those comparisons. but it was truly a blessing for me to remember.... there is a version of this out there that you love and that is Good Content TM. legit i can just go watch atla again to heal from this. omg yeah cuz REY HEALING HIS WOUND ALSO HEALED HIS SCAR. very crystal cave.......... nah but nah but - the ‘you are every jedi’ was EXTREMELY avatar-esk..... like, engage avatar state. i don’t like how it ended up being the same old conflict between jedi and sith - ‘good’ and ‘bad’ - OBVIOUSLY THE POINT IS TO INTEGRATE THE CONFLICTING PARTS OF SELF; THE SHADOW SIDE; TO TRANSCEND OLD DICHOTOMIES - but i did love hearing all the voices from past jedi. that’s some good ‘the ancestors are with you’ shit.

edit #4:

* i think the first thing we hear rey say is ‘be with me’? ngl i was like ‘pls be invoking the force bond’ X’D i am a clown. that was a beautiful shot though. and love that a version of the bond kicked in like two seconds after that.

edit #5:

*there’s that bit where reylo are fighting on the death star ruins and he’s winning and rey kinda falls to her knees panting and lowkey defeated and, not to be a shallow bitch but..... it was Hot.

*also dark rey......... was HOT. SHE WAS SO KIRA, WHATEVER THE FUCK THAT MEANS, AND I WAS INTO IT LIKE HNGGGG

*obvs i wanted rey to be truly no one. but casting jodie comer as rey’s mum ? ????? urgh, pefection, i love it.

*palps was so random i stg..... his plan was.... convoluted to say the least.

*also who was under all those hoods?

*the KOR just kinda... being around again was hilarious. no explaination required. the boys are back in town. ben facing them without a mask and essentially wearing his pjs? loved it.

edit #6:

*seriously though ben’s redemption outfit.............. /heart eyes emoji into the sunset/.......... you can see his collar bone.............. /cares about the important things/.................

edit #7:

*one thing i loved about the reylo was how Space Wizards TM they both were in this movie. it so highlights their connection by making it clear that they are each other’s only peer. i thought it would be a thing of ‘why is the supreme leader constantly interacting with/going after this girl?’ but it’s not because it’s so clear that they are the only two people on each others’ level. no one would dare question the fact that they’re constantly circling each other in a lustful murderous rage.

#tros spoilers #tros reaction #3 #4 #5 #mtp #the rise of skywalker #star wars #this is messy as hell #just getting some thoughts down

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ahouseoflies · 6 years

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The Best Films of 2018, Part II

Part I is here. Let’s keep it moving. ENDEARING CURIOSITIES WITH BIG FLAWS

103. Zama (Lucretia Martel)- In this movie there's a motif of Zama, an officer of the 18th century Spanish Empire, starting a scene by talking to someone or staring at someone off camera. After a minute or two, the camera cuts to some servant and disorients us. There's a person there, always there, to serve him, and it doesn't really matter who it is. It's a brilliant way to get at the colonialism that the character depends on but is still trapped by. So I get a little bit of what the film is trying to do, but it's boring. I'm an ignorant person who doesn't know how to watch Lucretia Martel's films or have any context for South American history, but I know what boring is. 102. I Feel Pretty (Abby Kohn and Marc Silverstein)- I like that Schumer tried something different instead of falling back on her persona, but there isn't enough new or interesting here for me to recommend--besides National Treasure Michelle Williams, of course. The film nearly displays "Do you see that she's turning her back on her real friends now?" on the screen. 101. A Simple Favor (Paul Feig)- At times cheeky and sexy and juicy, but it still wears out its welcome by twists ninety-one and ninety-two. 100. Double Lover (Francois Ozon)- Diverting until it gets silly, then so silly that it gets diverting again. There are about five too many twists, and I'm still unclear on how seriously the film takes any of those twists. More importantly, I don't think there's much of a takeaway from any of it. Ozon seems to have found a real muse in Marine Vacth though. 99. Borg Vs. McEnroe (Janus Metz Pedersen)- As a Shia Pet, I felt obligated to see his portrayal of Johnny Mac. I didn't learn anything that I didn't already know from this mediocre biopic though. Watch the documentary McEnroe/Borg: Fire & Ice instead. 98. Ralph Breaks the Internet (Rich Moore and Phil Johnston)- There's some clever visualization of the the Internet, such as the way that a link shuttles an avatar off in a transparent car or the way that shady newsboy types whisper about pop-up ads. And I liked a lot of the Disney tie-in stuff that critics are wincing at. As far as textbook screenwriting goes, it's great at that idea of making you think that the protagonists will accomplish their goal very easily, only to have them be re-directed to square one. The voice acting is top-notch. Why do these movies get so plotty though? I felt as if the internal logic started getting inconsistent about halfway through--at the same time that the first one got bogged down with candy stuff instead of 8-bit video game stuff. And if there are so many lovable characters from the first entry, why do we get such tiny servings of them here? The movie's too long already, but what I wouldn't give for an occasional cut back to Fix-It Felix raising some kids.

97. We the Animals (Jeremiah Zagar)- The Tree of Life is one of my favorite movies, and on its face, We the Animals is a really similar impressionistic memory. So why do I like it half as much? Are lighting and music that important? Is Jessica Chastain? Is latent racism? All I know is that this felt like a story I had seen before pitched at the same intensity for a running time I was happy to see expire. 96. Kodachrome (Mark Raso)- The three leads are all pretty good. (Ed Harris does this bashful, pulling-on-his-eyelid thing that killed me.) But with mathematical precision, the film matched each element I liked with another thing that infuriated me. Specifically, the whole plot hinges on one scene, and that scene is preposterous and alien to human behavior. 95. Deadpool 2 (David Leitch)- The pacing of these movies is bizarre to me; they're half-over before they really get started. No one else is bothered by the fact that Cable has no motivation or backstory for the first hour? Some of the connections to X-Men felt more forced this time around, but I thought this entry was much funnier than the first, even mixing in some more subtle visual gags. (The exotic locales montage ending in Biloxi really got me.) I have to give credit to the X-Force parachute sequence, which is audacious and unexpected. And clear out for Zazie Beetz, who is a huge star in the making. 94. At Eternity’s Gate (Julian Schnabel)- Something about Van Gogh was essentially unknowable, which is a great reason to make a movie about him and a terrible reason to make a movie about him. I'm not sure that Julian Schnabel got to the bottom of the man any better than anyone else has, though maybe that's an unfair expectation. To his credit, Schnabel yada-yadas the ear business and Van Gogh's death in favor of his more poetic understanding of the artistic life. The movie doesn't coalesce for me, but there's a banger of a scene between Dafoe and Mads Mikkelsen about the responsibility an artist has toward God. That short nested inside makes the whole thing worth seeing. The conversation I had afterwards with one of the two other people in the theater, an art historian, was a solid three stars. 93. Bohemian Rhapsody (Bryan Singer)- Some biographical movies do a good job of compressing time, and their supporting characters don't feel sacrificed or glossed over. For many other mediocre ones though, including this one, I submit the Three Scene Rule. Three scenes is kind of the minimum for a character to register an arc and for an actor to present any kind of dynamic performance, so in a lot of these true story movies, that's all that a supporting character gets. If you're looking for it, it's glaring. (Watch Hidden Figures again with the husband and boyfriend characters in mind. I'll wait.) This movie has a few characters that matter: Freddie Mercury, obvs; the other Queen members; Paul Prenter, the unfairly composited villain; and Mary Austin, the platonic love of Mercury's life. The movie spends way too much time on her, as if to tease the audience with the idea that Freddie might be straight. As for everyone else? Three scenes. Ray Foster, the record executive played by Mike Myers (!): A. "Look, guys, I like formulas. This opera stuff you're talking about? That sounds crazy." B. "The opera stuff is crazy. I ain't making that the single. You can walk out of here for all I care." C. [hangs head in shame after being proven wrong] Jim Hutton, Freddie's partner for the seven years this movie doesn't care about: A. "Look, pal, I may be a waiter, but you can't just grab me like that. On second thought, let's talk. You should learn how to love yourself." B. "Oh, hey. Glad you tracked me down, slugger. You love yourself now? Sure, let's go meet your parents." C. "Guess I'm your boyfriend now. Looking forward to the show." Freddie's Parents: A. "You go out every night! What are you doing out there? Why can't you be a good boy? What's up with your new name?" B. "Why can't you be a good boy? What's up with your new name?" C. "You're a good boy, I guess, even if you're gay. Guess that's your name for real." I like the idea of reproducing the Live Aid performance in full, and the movie comes alive during its musical sequences. But I wish that the same attention given to, like, the number of Pepsi cups on the piano was also given to the nuts and bolts of the storytelling.

92. The Predator (Shane Black)- I get why other people don't like this. The final fourth feels obligatory, and it seems cut to the verge of incoherence. But if you don't get a little tingle out of a game cast saying Shane Black things like, "Predators don't just sit around making hats out of rib cages," then we are very different moviegoers.

91. Sorry to Bother You (Boots Riley)- I admire Boots Riley's ambition, the way he's taking many of the ideas that drove his music and channeling them into film. But there are too many ideas and, strangely, too much plot to cohere. I liked some of the jokes, especially the Robocop-py TV clips laced throughout. I think my main problem, however, is Lakeith Stanfield as Cassius. He's a fascinating actor, but his energy is completely wrong for an everyman lead like this. I don't think he was the right choice to carry it. 90. Thoroughbreds (Cory Finley)- The repartee at the beginning is sharp, and there are some engaging elements of style. God knows I've never complained about rich, sad, nubile brunettes with strange eyes. But there are pieces missing in that forest-for-the-trees way that happens sometimes with debuts. Like, how do these privileged girls not have access to a gun when our national nightmare is based on all young people having access to guns? Or what is the exact motivation behind the crime at the center? Lots of great characters have been spurred by a violent curiosity, but a zinger here and there doesn't make these girls Raskolnikov. 89. White Boy Rick (Yann DeMange)- Even if this isn't it, I think Yann Demange has a great film in him. There's some urgency to White Boy Rick's politics, and it looks interesting. If nothing else, it succeeds in making the surroundings seem as gloomy as the characters all acknowledge them to be. But this isn't a great film in either of its halves. It's motivated by plot until a crucial event that I don't want to reveal, then it veers much more into character. I would normally sign off on that, but this movie grinds to a halt in the change and never recovers. McConaughey pulls his weight, but Richie Merritt is pretty bad in the lead. 88. The Strangers: Prey at Night (Johannes Roberts)- Despite some striking images and a welcome lack of explanation for the menace, Prey at Night doesn't reach the heights of its predecessor, mostly because the characters are too paint-by-numbers. 87. Ant-Man and the Wasp (Peyton Reed)- Probably the first Marvel movie that would benefit from more action. Some of the material is genuinely funny thanks to Michael Pena and Randall Park, but I got a little drowsy during the middle hour of talk about phase-shifting and the quantum realm. Get back to making things big or making things little, Dr. Molecule! 86. Creed II (Steven Caple Jr.)- The pieces are there, but it's a problem when Jim Lampley, who has one hundred times as many lines as the fifth lead, explains to the audience what they literally saw an hour earlier. If nothing else, this movie proves, through his absence, how good of a director Ryan Coogler is. I would be lying if I said I didn't get the chills at some key moments. Stallone’s performance and Jordan's muscles are good. But there was a dark, honest way for this movie to end, and it went directly against that ending into something more Hollywood. 85. Let the Sunshine In (Claire Denis)- Like Taxi Driver if Travis Bickle just wanted the guy to get him a glass of water afterwards. The film does have that kind of myopic focus--the sexy, ever-candid Binoche is in every scene--but it's far more elliptical, progressing only through character, never through plot. Let the Sunshine In is unique in a way that is different from Denis's other unique works: No one talks like an actual person, and she acts as if you should know all of the characters instead of properly introducing them. It's not supposed to be funny ha-ha, so excuse me if that's what I wanted.

84. Revenge (Coralie Fargeat)- like the style of this film, the color palette, the synth score, how far it's willing to go with the gore. But if it's called Revenge, and it's clear who the hero is (hint: not the rapist), then the whole thing feels like a fait accompli. We know exactly who's going to be the last woman standing, and we even know the order of the people she's going to kill.

PRETTY GOOD MOVIES 83. The Rider (Chloe Zhao)- This movie is trying to be a poem, but the parts I like the most are prose. It's a promising piece of filmmaking with heartbreaking moments, but I found it most effective when the storytelling spelled things out. It's an all-hands-on-deck independent film, so the amateurism of the piece shines through in the performances from non-professional actors. The relationship between Brady and his autistic sister is interesting because she speaks with that sarcastic cadence that can be learned from only children's programming. It's unlike what we usually see because, you know, she's a non-professional actor and real autistic person. So what do I know? 82. Unfriended: Dark Web (Stephen Susco)- Pretty tight from a storytelling standpoint and definitely grisly enough to get under the skin. But these laptop flicks move with such alacrity that it's hard to believe them whenever they ask you to buy something like love, since they paint it with the broadest strokes imaginable. Not that I would want a two-hour version of this anyway. 81. Juliet, Naked (Jesse Peretz)- Charming enough, arriving at a more realistic place than I expected, Juliet, Naked does nothing to make me revoke my charter membership in the Rose Byrne fan club. What an odd shape this film has though. The inciting incident happens at the hour mark, and it races obligatorily to an ending at an hour, thirty-seven. 80. Ocean’s Eight (Gary Ross)- It sets its marks and hits them adequately, with most of the charm that made the other Ocean movies fun. But there's something lifeless about Ocean's 8, both in the direction and the score. Take, for example, Richard Armitage's bland, sort of lost performance as an old flame/mark. It's such a nothing part that I began to think that it was a thesis: The men are just chess pieces, and they shouldn't take attention away from the women this time. But then James Corden emerges in the last half-hour and shines. So maybe Armitage was just bad and directed poorly? This movie exists for the Movie Star interplay though, and it delivers on that level. Cate Blanchett was good for so long that she's popular, and Sandra Bullock was popular for so long that she's good. Rihanna has to dress like a janitor at one point as a disguise, and she proves how absurd it would be for her to ever blend in. Anne Hathaway is the funniest of the bunch, balancing on a highwire of how big she's supposed to seem. Helena Bonham Carter gets the "and" hammer for all my credit fetishists. 79. Mary Poppins Returns (Rob Marshall)- I saw this on Christmas night with my family. The original Mary Poppins was the first movie my mom ever saw in theaters, and it's probably my wife's favorite. To the extent that insulting it is kind of insulting an important part of who she is. So I couldn't be the guy coming out of the theater like, "The Bankses definitely deserved to lose their house." Between you and me though, it's just fine. Entire sequences could be cut without damaging anything--do we ever come back to the bowl that Meryl Steep is supposed to be mending?--and most of the conflict feels manufactured. These legasequels always end up feeling like boxes being checked. We all know that the guys with the cannon had to come back, right? But some of the numbers are so joyful or stirring that even this grinch snuck a few smiles at his daughter as she pointed to the screen and said, "That's so silly." It's a good movie to see on Christmas night with your whole family. 78. RBG (Betsy West, Julie Cohen)- This movie is designed to make the viewer who would seek it out go, "What an American hero." It does that, I suppose, and there isn't a whole lot wrong with it. Yes, she is a very impressive person. But the film has too much untapped potential and too few teeth to recommend beyond that rubric of achieving its goals. For example, what about half of the population that would sneer at the notion that Ruth Bader Ginsburg is an American hero? Besides the inclusion of some radio clips over the credits, the filmmakers aren't concerned. "Look, she was friends with a conservative!"

77. Searching (Aneesh Shaganty)- Since I've seen thousands of movies that don't take place inside of a computer, there's still some novelty to the handful that do. On one hand, there are four or five twists too many, and the film isn't consistent with its own rules. On the other hand, it gets intriguingly dark for PG-13, and it never stops moving. 76. Uncle Drew (Charles Stone III)- The attitude toward women is retrograde, and to call the plot cookie-cutter would be an understatement. But this works, mostly because of the sunny, natural performances. Kyrie Irving, whose handles are even more of a marvel on a forty-foot screen, has to act through pounds of makeup, but he pulls it off. With only commercials to his name, he has to carry scenes of, like, standing at someone's grave and apologizing, and he has the presence and confidence to do it. I also should mention that Nick Kroll has a nothing-to-lose, galaxy brain performance for which probably zero of the lines were written ahead of time. "Shout-out to Oberto, shout-out to Aleve, the number one pain reliever in the game right now." I have to extend some of the credit here to Charles Stone III, who has made a calling card out of coaxing performances from newcomers. 75. Christopher Robin (Marc Forster)- Cute. 74. Unsane (Steven Soderbergh)- What seems to be a B-movie hitting its marks gets elevated by one fantastic scene that makes it seem timely and vital. I can't help but think Steven Soderbergh is punching below his weigh class though. I'm glad that an experiment like shooting a movie with an iPhone gets him up in the morning, and I know he doesn't want to make another Traffic or Out of Sight. But maybe, here's an idea, audiences might? 73. 22 July (Paul Greengrass)- The first thirty minutes are harrowing, in part because of their disciplined cross-cutting and Anders Danielsen Lie's chilling stoicism. The mistake that Greengrass makes is thinking that, later on, the three strands of story are equal in importance. He cuts away from the court case at its apex to see a kid trying to walk again or a prime minister demanding that his administration get tougher. Some moments are powerful, and Greengrass's composition and editing have mercifully softened, but this becomes a grind at a certain point. 72. Solo: A Star Wars Story (Ron Howard)- I hate to state the obvious, but this feels like multiple movies stitched together because that's exactly what it is. On one hand, we have the foggy opening, featuring an airtight inciting incident and setting up Emilia Clarke as that rarest of things in a Star Wars movie: a character with unclear motivations. But as the film goes on, it reveals why Han doesn't work as a protagonist. (Ehrenreich is bad, but the storytelling sinks the movie more than his performance does.) Everyone else in the movie drips with charisma and comments on the action while Han is left to connect the dots. In other words, the other characters get to be Han Solo, and Han Solo doesn't. By the time we get to the marauders, past the two hour mark of a movie that shouldn't have been more than two hours, the narrative crumbles under its own weight. These movies are way too competent to fail--I can list five or six moments that transcend the flaws--but each of these origin stories has a way of erasing the myth of Star Wars with a pen. 71. Bird Box (Susanne Bier)- This is a genre film that you've seen before in one way or another, so your expectations (and filmgoing experience even?) will dictate what you think of it. There's a metaphorical reading available, but that doesn't make the picture more artful automatically. Trevante Rhodes is a Movie Star. Here's what I can tell you: We need to appreciate John Gavin Malkovich while we can. Delivering the apotheosis of the selfish dickhead survivor character, he a) asks why the group can't stay in the grocery store forever, b) points shotguns at people when they try to let in strangers, c) drinks as he's telling people matter-of-factly that this is the end of the world, and d) (sort of) explains why he is the way he is. And-he-does-it-all-with-the-deliberate-cadence-that-you-are-doing-in-your-HEAD-right-NOW. I'm not saying the guy should win Best Supporting Actor or anything, but I admire his career more than any that would get a Best Supporting Actor.

#film #lists #movie reviews

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hardestgrove · 2 years

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I won't lie to you, I have a strong urge to draw the king children (especially Emily) any particular outfits we'd see Emily/them in?

BIG SCREAM.

EMILY depends on context:

up until about halfway thru her senior year you'd see her in pretty standard fashionable preppy clothes of the 80s unless you caught her own her own time, then it's extremely basic 80s goth wear, usually because there's no point in dressing up more she's just doing errands/hanging out.

then once you hit about december of senior year the masquerade is dropped for Plot Reasons and she's in full blown 80s goth attire. things like hair and makeup are still on the lower effort end (so smaller and less of it) because she's a [reba macentire vc] a single mom who works two jobs~ and doesn't have THAT much time in her life for that shit and does a lotta manual labor in her day. but since she's also dressing for school and not around the house she puts in more effort on her looks so it's now a step or two above like, bauhaus shirt, black jeans and goth boots/sneakers.

JACKSON is just eddie 2.0 fashion wise. they're both just 80s metalheads so like, that's the look lol. obvs not wearing a hellfire club shirt but just pick an 80s metal band around at that time and yeah. nailed it.

DAVID is more punk and skinheady. usually a plain shirt or band tee tucked in to basic straight jeans and then work boots like doc martens. alternatively, find a picture of henry rollins from the 80s, especially when his head's shaved. trace it. that's david.

STACY like "normal girl facade" emily is just "whatever is fashionable" only this time it's genuine. she's 100% out here dressing like every other teen girl in the 80s. very much on the more feminine end too. lots of skirts and dresses.

ALISON is similar to Stacy but more in that "this is why my mom/sister" put me in kinda way. also more likely to be in overalls. if it's cute and for a roughly 6-7yo girl from the 80s she'd probably be wearing it.

for REFERENCE:

emily's fc is taylor hickson in deadly class

jackson's fc is rory culkin in lords of chaos

david's fc is a young henry rollins from the band black flag (or jack o'connell in starred up in a pinch)

stacy's is shay ruldoph

alison doesn't have one atm but just think "cute tiny blonde girl" and you're golden

REFERENCE OUTFITS??????

you don't HAVE to use these but they do give an idea of the VIBES

Emily Incognito / Emily True Form (which outfit? yes. gender doesn't exist here)

Jackson

David

Stacy

Alison

#answered #king kids #LET'S NOT TALK ABOUT HOW I BLACKED OUT AND WENT ON A HUNT FOR FASHION REF LKDFJGHSDF #honored your even CONSIDERING this WOW

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thekintsugikids · 5 years

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ok so i KNOW this is dumb but i need to rant.

so i watched the new riverdale (which is probably more than enough of a reason for any of you to not read this and trust me—i understand). and ho. ly. shit. i have genuinely NEVER been so mad at a tv show in my whole fucking life.

i’ll admit here and now that i still watch riverdale, because i am unwaveringly stubborn and i’m seeing this shit show through to the end. so things that seem, from a surface level, pretty genuine, anger me more than they should because i know the context of this bullshit. which means that, if you’re reading this, you’ll have to hear all of that shit so i can fully explain my anger.

so the episode is like. almost entirely based around the high school’s guidance counselor (who everyone is conveniently going to for therapy, even a character who goes to another school, but i can’t even be mad at riverdale for using a shitty mcguffin like that. it should be expected) where all the kids talk about their fucked up lives. that’s cool, i can accept that. riverdale does some dumb shit, but if they’d just done a psychological deep dive into their characters after all the trauma they’ve been through over the course of two and a half years? sure. I’ll bite. but this is riverdale, a show that somehow seems to be written by teenage interns who have never written a script in their life and 40-somethings who have never met real teens in their lives, so that’s not what we got. no, what we did get was this shitty school counselor listening to the characters unload genuine emotional trauma about their parents, and hear the counselor basically say, “they’re just trying to protect you.”

now allow me to explain why that is absolute fucking bullshit.

Betty’s mom forced herself into her daughter’s counseling session, because Alice ran to the high school guidance counselor to ask how she should deal with her daughter being sexually actively—which already, big fucking yikes. after a couple of minutes of back and forth about how Betty is being denied by her dream college because she’s having sex and irresponsibly disregarding her future in doing so (which again, huge red flag but let’s put that on the back burner for like two seconds). the counselor decides that they should do a joint session to work some shit out. ok. fine. whatever. moving on.

Betty says her mom lying to her whole life impacted her negatively. which yeah, that actually makes sense. in less than two years her mother went undercover with the fbi and joined a cult, without telling her own child that she at least didn’t believe in what the cult preached, gave away all the money she had saved for college to said cult, and was working with her half brother who Betty believed was dead (this is riverdale it’s a lot to unpack and i don’t blame you if you stop here bc ive been watching this show since 2017 and im still confused when i read that). she also had Betty’s sister committed to the sisters of quiet mercy, which is basically a disciplinary school for literally anything and everything under the sun (pregnant teenagers, mentally ill children, and conversion therapy are a few things we’ve seen it used for), and didn’t tell Betty that her sister was there, or that she was pregnant. her parents let her believe that her sister was a drug addict in rehab, because that was better than anyone knowing their daughter was pregnant, and then ofc that Alice reads her diary because she refuses to let her daughter have any semblance of privacy. keep in mind, this whole episode started with Alice opening Betty’s mail, seeing that she didn’t get accepted to Yale, and telling her that she searched her room to see “what could be distracting her from her future” (and then gets mad at her for having birth control). her mother says, “I just wanted to protect you.” okay, fine. whatever, that’s total bullshit, but fine.

but then!!! she has a breakdown about how she wants Betty to be better and she’s scared of her growing up and she just wants her to be safe which. ok. ok. ok. shut up. she’s said this EVERY. SEASON. OF THE SHOW. how many times can she say the exact same thing and never learn from it? but Betty isn’t having that shit, she’s been dealing w this shit for so long and she’s done, right? she’s growing up, and her mom would have to be incredibly naive to think that she could just stop that, especially when they are living w her bf’s family. like yeah, they live together. they share a room. they’re teenagers, they’re gonna have sex. who. fucking. cares. her mom then tells Betty that it’s because she’s her favorite child, which........Yikes. and the scene ends.

the weird thing is like.....we’re meant to sympathize with Alice??? after everything she has done—much of which i didn’t touch on—because.............Betty’s her favorite child?????? that’s???????? SUPPOSED TO JUSTIFY THE THINGS SHE DOES?????????? no no no NO what the fuck is THAT manipulative bullshit?? what the fuck. i can’t even think of anything else to say about that, what the actual fuck.

but the real kicker ooooooooh bitch. it’s the end of the episode, with Jughead. many other things happen between the Betty’s session and Jughead’s, but they don’t necessarily fit into what I’m trying to say so I won’t be talking about it. but holy shit the things she said to Jughead? for context, Jughead’s father is an abusive piece of shit. he has gotten violent with his own son, threatened him, abandoned him for his gang when the rest of their family moved out of state to get away from him (Jughead’s dad), and he is an alcoholic who did things like getting drunk at Jughead’s 15th birthday party, and that’s just the cliff notes version. basically he’s a grade-a abusive asshole, which is a field i am well-versed in.

FP, Jughead’s father, says that his father was an abusive drunk, so obvs the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. one of the the biggest issues with this show, though, is that they refuse to acknowledge that FP himself is abusive. like, even writers of the show have said that he is not abusive, even saying that viewers were ignorant to believe that he is (and as someone with an abusive father, first of all, fuck you). and Jughead is on a mission this entire season to prove that his grandfather was some great writer or whatever and his work was stolen from him.

now, how exactly does any of that relate to the discussion at hand?, you might be asking. well he’s at riverdale high to get his transcripts or whatever bc he’s at a new school and they’re all assholes (no, im not going into further explanation of that because there is way too much to unpack). so he’s w the guidance counselor, they talk about it and she has the fucking gall to say, “but think about how your father must feel about all of this???” which, okay, i see where she might be coming from. FP was abused by his dad. but Jughead is also abused by FP, so why the fuck should he worry about whether or not he’s hurting his father? FP irreparably damaged Jughead—I promise you all that being homeless, being hit and threatened by your father, being abandoned by your entire family? that’s not shit you can repair. you don’t just fix that shit. that stays with you.

the counselor tells Jughead that he should be proud of the man his father worked to become (like he isn’t still horrible to Jughead????? for example, forcing him to go to a school that he does not want to go to because it makes their family look better??? ok), she says FP is just supporting his son. and the real kicker—she says, “and you repay him by going on this quest to prove that the man that caused him immeasurable pain is some kind of wronged hero? how do you think that makes him feel?” (that is the quote verbatim, by the way. that is what she says so Jughead)

like FP has earned something from Jughead. like Jughead is in the wrong for not wanting his name to be seen as a joke. no, this is how you repay him for everything he did for you. FP abused his son. it’s literally that fucking simple. and Jughead didn’t even want to talk to this lady, she forced him into the conversation while he waited for fucking transcripts so he could apply to colleges. and we, the audience, are supposed to be on the counselor’s side. we’re supposed to say “yeah Jughead, look at everything your dad has done for you! he loves you!!”

Jughead even says it himself. “My poor dad. I’m so selfish.” like his dad deserves his respect. like he earned Jughead’s respect. like FP deserves a single goddamn thing from his son.

keep in mind, this is a show that’s biggest demographic is people under 20 and they are basically telling their audience that their parent’s abuse is just because they’re “protective” or because they’re “trying to help them.” guess what, that’s not fucking true. if your parent, or ANYONE, is abusing you, it is because they are fucked up. it is not because they love you, it’s not because they “want what’s best for you.” and how dare anyone, let alone fucking Riverdale, try to tell me that it is. no, as someone with an abusive father, i fucking promise you, this shit is not out of love. abuse is not love. and fuck Riverdale for trying to tell me that it is.

#i put the whole thing in a read more link bc it includes personal shit that i dont want a bunch of ppl to just like. see.#and it focuses HEAVILY on the topic of abuse so pls do not read it if that makes you uncomfortable #also its v long #like. very. very long.#so if literally no one reads it thats fine #it probably doesnt make a whole lot of sense but i just kind of needed to unload my thoughts because i am so genuinely upset #k anyway bye #also please #don't reblog #for the love of god please dont or i will delete the whole goddamn thing

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wastrelwoods · 7 years

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anyway here are some top-tier cinematic taz moments that i think about often. its a long, LONG list so i stuck it under a cut

literally every time klaarg shows up without warning. i love that guy

killian’s first entrance, because it made me Gay

fuckin.....abrakafuckyou? that s a classic obviously i cant just leave it out

drinking game: every time magnus rips an arm off of an enemy, take a shot

MAGNUS JUMPING OFF THE BACK OF A SPEEDING TRAIN

the rockport ltd crashing into jenkins’ garden through the magic door. thats a good moment

the boys hanging from the rope over the pit of vines in the elevator shaft

taako under the mind control spell slowly unbuckling his harness and flippin off the back of the battlewagon. o n e f e a r

uh. you know. that Scene with hurley and sloane. obv they deserved better but in the context of this story? holy SHit. “you’re in ~trouble~” uh. they really. they’re in love

the first time ‘the red robe’ shows up in captain captain bane’s office

uh. when merle takes lucretia on a spa day and every second of their conversation is full o immense foreshadowing??

voidfish duet VOIDFISH DUET VOIDFISH DUET

the first time the ‘crinkle tinkles’ in the millers lab pick up and they can hear the souls singing? thats so good

angus is really good here but “goodbye. iloveyousirs!” thats gold

the. the slow and horrifying realization of who no3113 really is

lucas explaining the cosmoscope, and then time stopping as the red robe appears again. also...“y-you found her???”

maureen the robot SAVIN THE DAY and also defending her asshole son

obviously “and there’s something about the dying that feels familiar. and then all three of you are back in that white space, and you see that old woman again, and she says you’re going to have to do much better than that, loves.” but also the destruction of the bank before that

but also. the boys holding hands as the cycle ends and they’re looking down at the purple worm.

everything from “my name is taako, and you work for me now” through the diary of sherrif isaak and ending at “junebug ”

also isaak’s first real appearance, in the room that’s holding june and the chalice. my emo dramatic noir friend is underappreciated in fandom

we know how i feel about magnus’ backstory. i cry. i cry a lot. BUT when the temporal chalice is replaying the destruction of phandalin and the boys are standing in the middle. watching it happen. ouch oof ow my heart

the cart chase is ALMOST as cinematic as all of the battlewagon race but not quite on par

but. FUCK, MAN! every single epilogue scene throws me for a big ol loop here. merle watching the stars go dark? kravitz waiting in taako’s room for him to turn on the lights. magnus disrobed? FUCKIN G SHIT

obviously taako n kravitz’s date is great but more dramatic and beautiful is magnus swimming with the voidfish

i know this aint strictly in the timeline but when angus saves the day at fantasy wrestlemania and taako goes wild? thats iconic

welcome to wonderland has gotta be one of the best-described scenes of all time

the first time taako blinks is pretty cool i guess but when he does it after being crushed half to death under monster factory machinery and a thousand white eyes light up all around him. wow

uh when taako casts true sight on magnus in the middle of the bonus round and he suddenly sees the red robe and the liches and the mannequins and the smoke

pressing ‘forsake’ and seeing artemis, antonia, and rowan on the screen. “why?”

ARMS OUTSTRETCHED. thats the ICONIC moment isnt it. every second from the moment the animus bell rings to the end of the fight that destroys wonderland is Top Notch. even cam gets a nice heroic sacrifice

fuckinnng. Barry blueJEans is BAck, y’all. the twist of the fucking century

magnus shattering the voidfish tank and surfing down the carnage to take out as many hunger as he can before he dies

and coming BACK WITH THE FLAMING POISONING RAGING SWORD OF DOOM

also, angus holding merle and taako at wandpoint is definitely a big moment for me personally

i mean 90% of the stolen century is pure uncut narration and characterization but i love

magnus realizing he should maybe not fight the power bear

when lup pursuades them not to burn the robot world and leaves a fuckin machine gun with the guardian

when merle tells john to go fuck himself after being killed by him about 50 times in a row, and john says, ‘oh. i feel...sad’ guys i love merle

lup and barry’s get-together at the conservatory. poignant as shit, dude,

magnus carving ducks for fisher and running back to the ship with it at top speed

lup’s best day ever but especially when she explodes a fantasy DMV

davenport “haven’t we earned a little wrath?”

lucretia at the end of her solo cycle. “i fucking made it”

lup backflipping off the starblaster and goin lich on the hunger

pretty much all of episode 66 but especially the exits. those were... those were really . good? bad? they were certainly a lot

#all this to say: this is gonna be one hell of a finale #just keeps getting better #taz #thezonecast #taz spoilers

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thegrayblood · 6 years

Text

I need to say this: searching in people's twitter/Facebook history whatever, looking activily for problematic thoughts is really a shitty thing to do. Let me explain and im not saying this for anyone in particular.

Im NOT the same person i was when i was 11 years old. In fact i was pretty homophobic at that age but i didnt even knew was homophobic was. I know i was because of the knowlege i have now and after reflecting my past behavior/ideas. I grew up in a really small ultra catholic conservaty town, where the only gays you knew was the gays that worked in hair salons and in fact they were so "different" to what you considered "normal" and you grew up going to church every sunday hearing a man telling you that being gay was a sin. I didnt realize how toxic and hurtful this was for a lot of people until i wrote in a forum "if is true this anime character is gay?" (i dont remember the exact words i was 12 years old) but they were obv so offensive (even though i didnt use any direct offensive words) that a lot of people in this forum replied stuff like "well if he is, what's the problem?" Even a person DM me and told me that homophobic people in fact were secretaly gay. I felt attacked and i hadnt realized the impact of it or why; but i started to get educated in this forum for YEARS, it was not something i learned the day after: i started to get "comfortable" (that was the feeling i was feeling because this was a NEW thing to me) reading gay fanfiction, talking to gay people who was on this site and then i started to reflect my own way of thinking until i became the girl im now: so advocate of lgbtiq rights in my country, enjoying and accepting my bisexuality. But this didnt happen because i attended to school (in fact my school was pretty homophobic and i had shitty experiencies there) not because my conservative catholic parents educated me (I am everyday educating them) it was because literally i grew up on an internet forum where i met gay people, who educated me, who never allowed hate speech.

And you may say "oh well thats not an excuse" not its not but if you grew up being such a good person and having an extensive knowlege of the culturally and sexual diversity of our World, well congratulations! It means you grew up in a good enviroment with open-minded parents, in a country not ultra catholic and with an excelent system education who teached you to respect everyone.

If knowing that something is wrong is enough well the world would be totally different. An idea itself isnt enough if you dont contextualized it in the enviroment you're planting it. Even today, i have had only met 2 gay persons in my town and they were closeted.

I was so lucky i spend so much time on Internet in this forum meeting people around the world, because if that had not happened, i would surely have grown up being homophobic and being a closed minden person in general.

I believe you can change, i truly do. I believe in good education with context. I still today have a lot of things to change in my mentality, i like to do "plot twist" in my mind because i dont want to stuck in a single mentality.

People are not really bad, they're just not educated at all. People fear and reject what they dont know or dont understand, because it dont fit in their small, religious, poorly educated and poorly economic organized world, and this thing get worse if this particulary thing have never seen it in their life or if they have heard that it is a sin from person who represents their sacred religion

And change doesnt not happen a day to other. I still educate my friends every day and we're lucky we have access to Internet, access to other person experiencie, country, life in a single click.

For that reason i believe its really shitty to judge people for what they wrote 5 or 10 years ago. If you were an unproblematic and progressive and really educated teeneger, well good for you but not everybody grew up in your same afortunate enviroment

But i think also that if after you are educated and you have access to spaces where you can learn about social issues that You ignore and being enlighted in important things for our society and STILL you refuse to listen, to learn, to have empathy and respect, you refuse to reflect on your past/present behavior and thoughts, then fuck u. Because you have access to really change and you dont want because you dont care.

Anyway srly people stop doing that shit.

Btw english it's not my first language i'm sorry if there are a lot of spelling and grammar mistakes i am empiric.

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