#that's not an insult to blake it just is what it is

[shakebelton]

let me be serious for a sec about adam and blake and their images and fame and online discussion that goes with it and why i even care...

the thing about adam levine is that it's damn impressive how resilient he is. i would just be fucking evil now if i were him, but he's chilling. in retrospect, knowing all the facts, 2018-2022 was just a really messy depressive spiral for him (i'd like to think i would've picked up on it if i were following his life in any way at that point but who knows really) and it's just insane how he got (and still gets) dragged to hell and back for every minor messy thing he did. i think the public should forgive him, but also like i think there's nothing to forgive. it's just clown level discourse, everything that's been happening around him these past few years especially.

i cannot even imagine that every single one of my, however slight, fuckups, is ridiculed by millions of people for months at a time. once, i cried at an airport at 5 am when i found out from a tweet a person hated me (it hurt more that they admitted it wasn't really for any discernible reason). if i had 10% of the things that happened to him happen to me i would've straight up killed myself or been full on evil by now. and like, i'm not really seeing the jerk people talk about. god knows i've dug around in his life for two years now and i'm not seeing a bad person. and granted, he's literally Just Some Guy with flaws to me, not an "adorable kitten who must be protected" as 2013 tumblr seemed to believe, but also i'm not seeing an asshole. and yeah maybe he's somehow shittier than i think, there's so much private stuff i might not know about, but what i know is, every public thing of his that i've seen criticised is just horribly misconstrued, like it's just plain wrong just about all the time. like i'll be looking at him talk about his workout and he comes across fine, funny and down to earth, and then i'll read the comments and it's people saying he's full of himself. i'll see him recoil in shock as a fan he didn't see approach runs into him on stage and all the people are saying he thinks he's better than everyone. it really makes you think... like whenever i see something about people saying he was a jerk when they met him, i really question the truth of that, because i've seen what they label 'jerk' behavior from him and they are straight up wrong, straight up.

and it's not like i even want to like him either. he's too rich, too talented and too good looking, and lives at a level of comfort i cannot even imagine if i try, and it pisses me off. but goddamn it if it isn't downright impressive/commendable how he can go on with his life with the amount of hate thrown around. he's stepping back, shutting up, minding his own business in the face of ill intentioned insanity, and it's almost incomprehensible to me.

it's somewhat similar when it comes to blake too, by the way. the shit that man's gone through and is still going through about everything related to his divorce with miranda and him getting together with gwen, i cannot even grasp it. and unlike adam's, blake's situation is even more crazy in some ways, because so much of stuff about him is just lies, like just completely made up by tabloids things, or full on delusions. and it's hard for me to imagine carrying on with my life, calm and silent, in that face of things like that potentially happening to me, and i applaud them for it.

so when it comes to me writing fanfic about them, i started out with mostly fun things, like pretty much on the crack side, just because their stuff on the voice is mostly banter and it's funny and you naturally try to replicate that dynamic in your writing. but lately i've been trying to explore angsty writing more, and the truth is that i can't even scratch the surface of it, of the level of low i perceive them to have experienced. some of it's really just drawn out hell, and i can't stay there long enough, story wise, to give it the justice it deserves. but i'm gonna keep at it, because the bad, upsetting things they've gone through just astonish me, and it's just endlessly fascinating to explore complex human emotion like that, and some of it even helps me work through my own trauma or figure things out in my own life. so at the end of the day, it's not all about them, it's about me, but sometimes i just can't stop thinking about their stories.

[limethefirst]

PART 2 OF VOID RUNNERS PLEASEE😭🙏

Void Runners Pt.2

pairings: Deadpool x Wolverine x teen!reader

warnings: contains heavy spoilers for Deadpool and Wolverine, swearing, crude humor, Deadpool

summary: After escaping Cassandra's lair you find yourself tagging along with Deadpool and Wolverine in hopes of saving their universe as well as getting out of the void

Part 1

a/n: Ask and you shall receive! This is a continuation of Void Runners since people seemed to really enjoy it! I hope it lives up to what you guys were expecting, I was thinking of ways to involve the reader a bit more! Request are open

You had no idea what was happening. One moment you were watching as Cassandra was about to let the giant monster known as Alioth eat you, the next you were being squished by Deadpool on some type of rocket soaring through the sky escaping the close clutches of death itself.

There wasn't much time to process anything because you were already about to crash, and were flung straight into the hard, dusty ground you've come to know as the Void.

A groan escaped you lips as you sat up, looking towards your new companion's, Deadpool and Wolverine; noticing how Deadpool was on top of him, your brows raised a bit.

"What cha' thinking 'bout?" Deadpool asked him, his voice laced with an innocent tone.

Logan wasn't fond of this at all, "Get the fuck off of me," he said, almost growling at the man.

"Shh shh, almost done"

"Almost done what?!" he look up at Deadpool, concerned about what he meant by that.

Deadpool now changed his tone to a more annoyed one, "Getting my knife out of your buttock, you pervert! Get your bind out of my pants!" Both men were now getting up, "I'm telling Blake!"

Deadpool looked over to you and grabbed your arm pulling you up next to him. Then he gave you a silly thumbs up, which you didn't understand why but just gave him a smile in return as a thank you for the gesture.

"New rule!" Logan began again, "I talk now" this time he looked at you as well.

"I haven't even said anything?!" You looked at him confused. Throwing your arms up a bit, and looking at Deadpool as well.

"Hush little one, Papa is talking right now" Deadpool looked over to you, holding up one finger to signal you to be quiet as he talked to Logan. You threw your arms up again now looking at Logan as he groaned at whatever was going on, obviously exhausted.

"Shut the fuck up!" Logan had now turned around, "Let me fucking think, we gotta get back to paradox right? Right?"

"Am I allowed to speak now?" Deadpool asked him sarcastically, you could tell he was smiling.

"Just nod asshole" Logan was fed up at this point.

Deadpool gave in and gave Logan a slight up and down, letting his buddy say what he needed to. Logan then looked at you as if something in his brain clicked.

"Johnny said something about others before you got him killed!"

"Poor kid? He was like fifty!" Deadpool shoots back, insulted by the comment.

Logan looked back at you, "You've been here longer then any of us have, do you know where we can find these guys?"

You hesitated before speaking to him, "I have an idea," you said, Logan looked back at Deadpool and nodded.

"You're gonna help us find them and get us out of here," Logan told you. He wasn't willing to listen to any protest, but you didn't care to argue, this was your chance at escape and by God you were gonna take it.

"Alright, I'll do my best then." You nodded at him, jumping on the bandwagon of opportunity.

"Oh I knew it was a good idea to bring you along sugar sprinkles!" Deadpool said as he patted your back, which honestly felt more like a hard slap, that lightly pushed you forward.

"You better fix my shit like you fucking promised," Logan pointed his finger at Deadpool's chest as you stepped to the side, look straight ahead noticing something in the distance.

"I smell a quest!"

"I smell food,"

This caused both men to look at what you were looking at.

A little restaurant not to far from here.

Logan was turning the place upside, you were unsure what he was looking for as he'd already found you guys some unopened spam to eat.

Deadpool finally had his mask off and you noticed what he looked like without it, you couldn't help but feel bad for him, even with the way he is, something tragic must have happened for his face to be all scarred the way it was.

"So what made you finally wear an honest to God costume?" He asked in between bites, "Mines red so they can't see me bleed." This time he turned to you and gave you a strange smile as he took yet another bite. "I can see how yellow can be useful too!"

Logan turned around and stared him down, "Have you been checked for ADHD?"

"Nu uh," Deadpool answered, mouth full with a big smile.

"You should," This time you answered as you finally tried the spam, it wasn't too bad for God knows how old it could've been.

You could hear a chuckle come from Logan as he continued his search.

"Though I've had several STD's, probably caused by ADHD" Deadpool told you guys.

You just rolled your eyes at him, wondering where he gets these ideas from. You guys both sat there longer watching Logan. Deadpool sat on one side of the booth, you sat on the edge of the table a bit, and Logan was still searching.

"What are you even looking for?" You asked the bigger man, curious what was making him more frustrated then the red masked fellow next to you.

All you heard was a mumble before you saw him grab a bottle of rubbing alcohol.

"No no no no no, that's rubbing alcohol, you don't want to-" Before he could even finish his sentence Logan had already chugged most of it down, you turned a bit to him and sat yourself next to Deadpool watching Logan come towards the table, "Oh yup there you go, there you go, fuck that liver."

"Don't come to me when you need a liver transplant," Deadpool gave an amused snuff at your comment and turned back to the big fellow.

"What the fuck are those?" Logan was looking at, staples in Deadpool's head? You turned to look at it and you stared a little too hard that you could see the little strands of most likely fake hair pinched in between it.

"Oh, back in civilian life I wore a toupee, but nobody knows," Deadpool gave a little smile as he looked at you guys, touching his phantom hair.

Both you and Logan began to laugh a little at this, "They fucking know" you told him.

Logan joined in on the teasing, "Everybody knows," Logan gave you a smile, being glad someone else is there to help him tease the annoying red suited vigilante.

"Wanna talk about what's haunting you, or are we gonna wait for a third act flashback?"

"Ughh go fuck yourself," this was all it took for Logan to go back to the bar stools as he sat there, drinking his rubbing alcohol.

You gave Deadpool and annoyed look at elbowed him a bit, trying to get him to lay off the man a bit; it seemed to get through to him, as he rolled his eyes and began to talk again, "In my world, you're uh, well regarded."

"Not in mine," Logan didn't look back, he just took another sip.

"Well they don't like me much in my world," Deadpool said trying to lighten the mood.

"We couldn't tell.." You told him, as you stood up and threw away your empty spam cup.

"I wanted to be something, you know? Shit, I wanted to be an Avenger!"

"Fuck the Avengers,"

"I didn't make the cut though, same with the X-men," Deadpool paused, picking his next words wisely. "My girlfriend left me,"

"You had a girlfriend?" Logan asked, with genuine curiosity.

"Yea, Vanessa, when we met she was a dancer, made a whole life, it was good, but oh boy I just, uh"

You stood by the trash, leaning against the wall, not wanting to intrude on their moment.

"But fuck, you were an X-men, fuck that you were the X-man. You, uh the Wolverine, you were a hero in my world."

"Yea well, he ain't shit in mine." Logan finished his drink, if that's what you could even call it.

Deadpool turned to you, as if asking you to say something too. You let out a bit of a sigh before speaking.

"You saved me in my world."

Logan turned his head a little bit, and Deadpool gave you a somber look, unlike his normal self.

"I was in an accident, but I saw this man with metal claws, he helped me, he got me out." You closed your eyes and breathed.

"It inspired me to become who I am today, every Wolverine, is a hero in every universe, no matter what." You looked up at the both of them, "Well it's what I think at least. I didn't recognize you at first, but when I heard your name, I knew who you were, even if you aren't from my universe."

Logan looked back down at his empty hands, he began to think. The silence was killing you. Deadpool could tell and so he went back to his normal demeanor. "Alright sugar tits," Deadpool looks at Logan, "Time to go!"

It was time to continue your adventure in finding the people who would help you escape this place.

[lovingdabeessss]

One of my favorite things about Rwby

Is this dynamic

Ruby Weiss and Blake all have world altering importance

And yangs just like a very determined older sister

Yang just wants her family all safe and happy and would happily die to ensure this

Yangs just like “this is my found family” and it’s like the most important people in the world

Not that this is at all new she’s just like surrounded by them her uncle is one of the best huntsmen alive despite being falling over drunk all the time considering he does all of ozpins missions personally and always by himself Ravens so good of a criminal she was on salems radar plus she’s MAGIC and can turn into a damn bird AND so yangs gif that in her I guess + the whole maiden thing summers super important somehow connected to salem as well ironwood who was the general for a WHILE was so close to qrow he might be her or rubys god father ozpin liked strq so much he gave two members magic so he might be a godfather too cause he seems to be really close to the family too

She’s like a magnet

And Yangs still just kinda there and she doesn’t consider any of these people like high and mighty or anything for being so important

She talks to ironwood super casually for the highest ranking military commander ever when he visits her after she becomes a criminal in v3 Qrows just her uncle when she speaks to Raven she’s totally ok with the idea of beating up her entire clan of criminals to get what she wants and then doesn’t respect a THING she says even after the reveal that MAGIC IS REAL and then when they Talk again after Raven joins salem, the bad guy and reveals she’s the MAIDEN which is super powerful yang insults her over and over with only one of her arms like she’s in no danger and then when she confronted ozpin/ Oscar about what Raven told her she gives him no special treatment for being a magical wizard that her entire family (minus Raven) trusts to make any decisions

Yang makes no exceptions no one is special yang would look the gods in the eyes and go “fuck off” and see nothing wrong with that

[howi99]

Prince of Vale part 1

Yang: *sigh* Why are we in detention... Again?

Weiss: *side eying Blake* Because someone decided to run head-first into a major heist!

Blake: *rolling her eyes* How was i supposed to know they wouldn't surrender on the spot?

Weiss: *bewildered* You.... You are joking, i hope? Or else, i'd think even Jaune would be brighter than you.

Blake: *sigh* Yes, i am. *Crossing her arms behind her head, looking up* But i wasn't expecting it to go south that badly.

Ruby: *reading the newspaper, at first out of boredom but now completely focused* Speaking of Jaune, did any of you knew that he's basically a prince?

Weiss: *looking at Yang, not believing her* What are you on about? That baffoon can't even speak properly and has no manners. You can't seriously believe- *get shoved the newspaper in her face* Hey!

Ruby: *point at the article* I'm not joking. Page 21, "the only son of the Valois, a branch of the old royal family, returned to Vale as a huntsman-in-training". It even says that they still own a majority of the lands south and east of Vale.

Weiss: *taking the newspaper, beginning to read aloud* Yesterday, the only remaining branch of the royal family with a claim on the throne announced that... *Blink* that... *Put the newspaper down, goes to her end table to pick up reading glasses then take back the journal* ... IS THIS SOME KIND OF JOKE!?

Yang: *looking over her shoulder, reading* Oh? Oh! *Devious smile* Oh oh oh damn! *Look at Ruby* that's for real!?

Ruby: *nods* Hm!

Blake: ... What's going on?

Weiss: *not calm at all* What's going on? WHAT'S GOING ON!? THAT DULL IMBECILE IS THE NEXT IN LANE TO THE THRONE! HE'S GOING TO BE KING NEXT YEAR!

Blake: *takes the newspaper from her* That can't be right... *Read in silence* ... Hm. *Look up* Well, congratulations Weiss, you insulted and spate on the kindness of the soon-to-be king of Vale.

Yang: *crossing her arms with a grin* So, remember all these times you said he was just after your name?

Weiss: That doesn't change anything! And how was i supposed to know he was a Vallois!?

Blake: Well, the article does say he was hidden and sheltered almost all his life, due to the family not wanting him to be distracted from his noble duties.

Weiss: *blanching* Oh god... That's why he's so inept with social interaction!?

Yang: *nods* Yep. *Place her hand on Weiss shoulder* Ice queen, you insulted and denigrated someone who basically just began learning about socialising.

Blake: *look surprised, then worried*

Ruby: *looking at Blake* What's wrong?

Blake: ... Ruby, Did you read the end of the article?

Ruby: *shaking her head* No. I was to excited to share the news, why?

Blake: The reason Jaune is getting the throne... His mother... *She stop talking*

Ruby: *realising what Blake was going to say, hurriedly rush out of the room*

Yang: *Knowing full well the look on Blake's face* Shit. *Goes after Ruby*

Weiss: *clueless, take the newspaper* What's wrong with her? *Read, then freeze up* Oh god... That's... That's horrible...

Blake: *nod* Yeah...

Meanwhile, in the cafeteria

Jaune: *reading the newspaper* ...

Nora: *stuffed with pancakes* Ah~ *sees Jaune getting up* Jaune Jaune? Where are you going?

Jaune: *stop for a second, then smile at Nora* Oh nothing, i just... Want to go for a walk. I shouldn't be long.

Pyrrha: *looking at him, perplexed* Really? But, you said you couldn't feel your legs because of training. You sure you will be fine?

Jaune: *laughing* I was just exaggerating, Pyrrha. Beside, it's not like i can slack off, right.

Pyrrha: Do you want some company? I just finished and i could for a little run

Jaune: *shaking his head* Nah, i'll be fine. I won't ask you to sacrifice your morning for me.

Pyrrha: *sigh* As if spending time with my partner would be a sacrifice. You really should work on your self esteem, you know?

Jaune: Eh eh, sorry. *Takes the newspaper with him* see you both later! *Leave*

Nora: *seeing him go* Something is off.

Pyrrha: *nod* Yeah. I know what i made him do yesterday and he should be crying in pain at every step. Heck, i'm still sore myself.

Nora: You know, you really sounds like you are fucking.

Pyrrha: *sigh* Nora, we both know i wished it was the case.

Nora: *chuckle* Eh, true... But seriously, he looked... Sad.

Pyrrha: I know... Should we follow him?

???: I wouldn't do that if i were you.

Pyrrha: *turning to see Ren* Why's that?

Ren: *sit down with them* He asked to be left alone. The best we can do is to follow his wish.

Nora: If you say so.

___________________________________________

Jaune: *sigh, tired, as he is sitting next to the fountain* ... *See two black boots with red laces* ... *Looks up, seeing a familiar pair of silver eyes reflecting his own eyes* ... Leave me alone...

Ruby: *silently sit next to him, not saying anything* ...

Jaune: ... *Looking at the horizon* ...

Ruby: *doing the same* ...

Jaune: ... *Close his eyes* I've always wanted to be a hero. Be there for others, always with a smile... *Chuckle* my mom thought it was stupid, that i would better serve the kingdom as a ruler. *His fist clench* I never wanted to be a prince. I wanted to be like my dad, an Arc... That's the last thing i said to her, when i left. *Shaking his head* Can you imagine? I spat on everything she ever did for me, even though i know she loved me and my sisters more than anything. And all of this for what? I'm no hero, no huntsman, no nothing.

Ruby: *looking at Jaune, seeing tears running down his face* ... *She gets closer to him, now shoulder to shoulder*

Jaune: ... She was sick when i left. And i didn't even saw it. I never asked why she was tired all the time, or why she looked so sad when she was with us... I... *Shaky breath* I even refused her parting gift. The one she made for me, even after all i had said and done.... I... *Tries to wipe away his tears with his hands, failing* I... *Sobbing* I should have been the one dying... *Cry* I'm so sorry....

Ruby: *hug him* Don't say that... *Hug him harder* Never say things like that...

Jaune: *trying to get out of the hug, still crying* I'm a monster! I said all those things, i refused to listen! How *sob* how could you understand!?

Ruby: I can't! *She looks at him, tears in her eyes* When my mom died, the last thing i said to her was goodnight, so i can't understand what you are feeling!

Jaune: *still trying to get rid of her hug* THEN WHY? WHY SHOULD I LIVE? I DIDN'T CARE FOR HER! SHE WAS DYING IN FRONT OF ME AND I DIDN'T EVEN SEE IT!

Ruby: *tightening her grip* BECAUSE YOU CARED! YOU CARED SO MUCH THAT YOU WOULD DIE FOR HER AND THAT, BOTH ME AND MY SISTER KNOW HOW IT FEELS!

Jaune: *weakening his attempts* B-but all i said... All these mean things-

Ruby: *now crying as much as him* YOU THINK I NEVER WAS MAD WITH MY FATHER? WITH MY SISTER? *Sobbing, her voice trembling* WE.... We are teens! We are stupid, brash and our mouths are full of... Of shit!

Jaune: Bu-

Ruby:NO! NO BUT! *Pleading look* Please! You know she wouldn't want that!

Jaune: *looking down, still sobbing* I... I know she wouldn't want that. *Sob* I know she would prefer that i laugh and smile but... It's so hard.

Ruby: *placing her forehead on his* I know it's hard... I know it will never be the same... But... *sobbing* You are my best friend... And... I won't let you go. Never ever.

Jaune: *hugging Ruby back* Ruby...

Ruby: *sob* So! I want you to promise me to never say that again!

Jaune: W-what? Why?

Ruby: *sad smile* You said an Arc never goes back on a promise. S-so...

Jaune: ... *Sigh* I can't promise you that Ruby...

Ruby: *hugging him harder* ...

Jaune: ... But i can try. *Shake his head* no... I will try.

Ruby: *looking into Jaune's eyes* Can you promise that?

Jaune: *calming down, weakly laughing* Yes, i promise i will try my best, Ruby.

Ruby: Arc promise?

Jaune: *nod* Arc promise.

???: *coughing* So... Should i call dad and tell him you two are finally dating or?

Ruby and Jaune: *both look up, seeing Yang and the rest of team JNPR*

Yang: *looking at them, smiling gently* Are you ok? Both of you?

Jaune: *nod* I'll manage... *Look at Ruby*

Ruby: yeah, *nod* i'm ok.

Yang: *nod* Ok good. *Grin* But my question still stands, since you both seem glued together.

Ruby and Jaune: *realising they are still hugging very close from one another, separate quickly*

Ruby: We are not dating!

Jaune: Y-yeah! We are just friends!

Yang: Aw~ you are both blushing! *Chuckle* I'm joking l, you two.

Pyrrha: *crossing her arms, looking both relieved and angry* You know you disappeared on us, right?

Jaune: *looking perplexed* what?

Nora: We were searching you for hours! We only found you because they both spotted you here!

Jaune: *looking at his scroll* It's already 5? *Shaking his head* Him sorry, i didn't think-

Ren: You don't need to be sorry. *Sigh* Honestly, we should be the ones asking for forgiveness. I... Honestly thought you were sad because Weiss rejected you again.

Jaune: ... Pfft, Ahahahahaha!

Pyrrha: Jaune?

Jaune: *still laughing*

Nora: *questioning look at Ren*

Ren: *shrug*

Jaune: *calming down* Oh gods, i needed that! *Gets up* I guess my etiquette and manners classes did teach me something, if all you three were fooled. *Weak smile* But still, i'm sorry for worrying you guys.

Nora: *nod* Good, you don't have the same sadness in your eyes.

Pyrrha: Next time, i'll be the one who will comfort you... Wait! I didn't mean i wanted you to be sad! I don't want this to happen again!

Jaune: *chuckle* Dont worry, i got the meaning.

Ruby: *getting back up* So... See you later?

Jaune: *turn around, nodding* Yeah, see you after detention.

Ruby: ...! Oh shoot! The detention!

Meanwhile

Blake: ... You think we will also get into trouble?

Weiss: Honestly? I would be surprised if we weren't. *Sigh* Why do everyone forget we have scrolls?

[rachetmath]

RWBY x Video games pt 2

Ruby: Okay so this time we were paired or geouped for some games. Me and my team were in Borderlands.

Jaune: Really? Which one?

Yang: All of them.

Jaune: *laughs* Okay. Okay. So who was right, the hunter or the deemed villains?

Ruby: Simple it was-

Weiss: Villains.

Blake: What?!

Yang: Babe we have to admit in a world like Pandora it might as well be the insane, and probably the most irredeemable place to live in.

Ruby: Doesn't matter. Jax is more evil than all those psychos. He knew what he was doing.

Weiss: Yeah but he was trying to get rid of psychos and provide people who are less crazy a safe place to live. Even though it's madness considering he’ll tax people.

Blake: What about the twins?

Yang: I mean shoot they were more of an after-product. They might as well represent that being a hunter ain't all what it is cracked up to be. Cause there will always be somebody bigger and badder who will one-up you in every way. Not just that they probably have brought more order to Pandora than we ever did.

Ruby: But-

Jaune: Okay! Forget I asked before you tear each other apart.

Ruby: Fine. Anyways what games were you guys in?

Nora and Ren: It Takes Two.

Yang: Oh. I mean it's easy considering-

Nora: No, we had issues.

Ren: A lot of them.

Nora: But the levels were beautiful. And Jaune.

Jaune: ?

Nora: If you ever want to talk I’m here.

Jaune: Hm.

Ruby: Wow you and Jaune have… tension.

Nora: I know.

Yang: Anyways, what about you, Jaune?

Jaune: O well I was by myself-

Emerald: Oh hell no. You lying ass bitch.

Weiss: Woah, hold on, Emerald why are you mad?

Emerald: I was with his pussy ass in the game. It took hours to get out.

Jaune: Cause you couldn't let me do my objectives.

Emerald: And make the game easier to where the Grimm will suspect us? No.

An incoming message saying, “The objective is to clear the game. The NPCs would have made his job hard enough considering there is no save button. You just made it more difficult for him by getting in his way. You could have stood still.”

Jaune: See.

Emerald: Well I gave you a fair shot.

Jaune: Please, it took you killing me I don't know how many times for me to even want to settle the score. By the way, I didn't appreciate the dry humping.

Emerald: Fuck you.

Jaune: Fuck you too. Don't be mad because I managed to outplay you. You are just trash.

Emerald: Okay. See-see we can fight. We can settle this now.

Jaune: Girl I will have you on your knees, begging. In fact I will have you scream my name and call me ‘Daddy’ like you ain't my daughter.

Nora: Are you two trying to insult each other or-

Emerald: Yes!

Jaune: Probably both.

Ruby: I feel disturbed to ask but what game was-?

Jaune and Emerald: Death Loop.

RWBY: Ew.

Nora: Gross.

Ren: I mean-no, I- I second that. Ew.

Emerald: *blushes* Shut up!

Ruby: Anyways where’s Oscar?

Oscar: Here.

Ruby: What game were you in?

Oscar: I wasn't in a game.

Jaune: What?!

Emerald: Don't tell me you have been sitting here the whole time.

Oscar: Yep.

Jaune: Oscar we are going through hell trying to stay alive. You didn't think to go and try to find us a way out?

Oscar: Sorry.

Jaune: Damn it!

Emerald: Stupid ass- Hazel made a damn mistake sparring you!

Jaune: Hey now don't get out of line.

Emerald: Or what?!

Jaune: I-

A door appears.

The message said, “If you two need to blow off steam then take a break here.”

Yang: Seriously? Like they are that tense to-

The door closes immediately with Jaune and Emerald gone.

Blake: *jaws dropped*

Weiss: They-they… impossible…

Ruby: Weiss claim down I sure-

Emerald: Ah~ Yes~ Harder. HARDER!!!

Ruby: Oh I hate being wrong.

Weiss: Fuck.

[rwby-encrusted-blog]

Can the RWBY Character say the Bad word for Gay?

Based on those shorts by Jake Blennings

Ruby: Yes, But she won't.

Weiss: Yes, and Has, originally as an insult, but now as a matter of pride in her bisexuality.

Blake: Yes, but chooses not to.

Yang: I cannot fathom Entertaining the Idea that she can't. She's a sapphic that catches on fire, the word was LITERALLY MADE FOR HER

Jaune: Yes, And has, but only because he didn't know what it meant so he asked his mom, and when he learned what it meant he washed his mouth out with soap and threw up because he was scared he was homophobic.

Pyrrha: Yes, but won't, both because she personally doesn't want to, and she'd be cancelled faster than Ruby eating a platter of cookies.

Nora: Yes, uses it as both a compliment and an insult.

Ren: Yes, but when he says it he more likely means a bundle of sticks.

Oscar: Yes, but when he says it he more likely means a bundle of sticks.

Emerald: Yes. She hasn't, but she could.

Mercury: Yes, but he thinks he isn't allowed to. Does anyway.

Cinder: Yes. Like Yang, but. Evil.

Neopolitan: Yes, but she doesn't speak, so no? Like, she can speak, she chooses not to, but-

Roman: My Man wears eye-shadow and acts like a theater kid. He can say. Even if he's cishet, I'm giving him a pass for the word.

Qrow: Yes. This man is SO Bisexual, trust me.

Raven: On one hand I want to say no because of vibes, on the other hand I want to say yes because I enjoy Rosebird and Hellbirds, and in a third hand, there's the ones that REALLY ship Rosebird and Hellbirds pointing a .38 Colt Revolver at me, so I think she can say it.

Taiyang: oh he can FUCKING Say it, if it mean she can take me out to dinner.

Summer: oh GODs Yes.

Ozpin: Yes, he can. He won't, but he could.

Glynda: I'm gonna be honest ... I don't think so, not just a faculty member of prestigious school, she's just ... I dunno. Not strong vibes for or against her saying it.

Oobleck: No he can't, and he doesn't.

Port: No he can't, but does because he means a Cigar/Cigarette

Jacques: No, does anyway knowing FULL Well what it means.

Ironwood: No, does anyway but he means a bundle of sticks.

Winter: Yes. She doesn't know she can, but she can.

Willow: Can, has, and will.

Whitley: See; Weiss, but with the understanding he hasn't realized it yet.

Robyn: I'm sorry, this woman is fighting against the Government with a band of other, strong, smart, capable women Of course She can fucking SAY it.

Kali: Yes, Doesn't because she's married to a political figure.

Ghira: Yes, IF IT MEANS HE CAN TAKE ME OUT TO DINNER-

[howlingday]

Jaune Arc Is A Creep

Cardin: Ha! You stupid nerd! (Shoves Jaune) Reading books and shit!

Jaune: Laugh while you still can! You're the stronger one now, but some day, I'm going to grow up, and I'm going to teach myself how to make chloroform and knock you all out! Then I'll drag you into my basement and chain you to the walls! The first thing you'll see when you wake up is me, standing over you as your new god!

Jaune: AND THEN I'LL MAKE YOU WORSHIP ME IN WAYS NO GOD HAS BEFORE.

Cardin: ...

Ruby: (Bandaging him) And then what happened?

Jaune: (Sniffles) They beat me up and took my books~!

----------------------------------

Ruby: Fuck you guys! I'm going back out there and kicking their asses!

Jaune: No, Ruby! Vengeance protocol dictates that we should lay low after an attack and conserve our resources!

Ruby: Fuck the rules! They insulted us!

Jaune: Ruby, as a guy who gets his ass kicked so much he could be a professional, listen to me. The only thing we can do for now is survive!

Ruby: Oh, so I should just cower like you, should I? LIKE A LITTLE BITCH?!

Yang: (Pops Ruby in the head) As far as I can see, you're the only one acting like a little bitch here, Ruby. Now listen to what Jaune has to say.

Jaune: Thanks for sticking up for me, Yang!

Yang: Shut the hell up, Jaune! And you, Ruby Rose, open your mouth.

Ruby: Wha- (Bread shoved in, Gagging)

Jaune: Oh! Oh... Oh, wow... That's... That's kinda hot, Yang.

Yang: Eat, Ruby. Eat and build your strength.

Ruby: (Crying)

Jaune: Keep crying, Ruby. It'll make the bread taste like tears.

----------------------------------

Pyrrha: Jaune, I know this is tough, but... Is there a higher power you worship?

Jaune: I used to worship Monty Oum.

Pyrrha: Who's Monty Oum?

Jaune: THE GOD OF DEATH.

----------------------------------

Goodwitch: You there! Who the fuck are you?!

Jaune: Jaune Arc, sir!

Goodwitch: Why the fuck are you here, trainee?

Jaune: To become a huntsman, sir!

Goodwitch: That's bullshit! Look at you! I bet you play with dolls!

Jaune: Well, yes, but only for roleplay revenge fantasies, sir!

Goodwitch: Shut up, Banana-Slut!

----------------------------------

Blake: You can do it, Weiss. Just focus on your core when using the tether.

Jaune: Yeah, it's not too hard if you concentrate.

Weiss: Even you can do this, Arc? I know I'll regret asking this, but what's your secret?

Jaune: I, uh.... I kinda have a natural advantage with this skill.

Weiss: What do you mean?

Jaune: I, uh... I used to experiment a lot with auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Weiss: ...Just take me up the tether.

----------------------------------

Jaune: Oh! I also like to read!

Blake: Oh, really?

Jaune: Yup! For example, did you know that if you electrocute someone underwater, it'll leave no burn marks?

Blake: ...

----------------------------------

Jaune: So... I gave it a lot of thought, and I decided. I'm going to serve on the front lines.

Nora: What?! Why?! Jaune, seriously, you suck at everything you do!

Jaune: I know.

Nora: With your tactical brilliance, you could easily land a spot as an officer away from the battlefield!

Jaune: I know.

Nora: So why the hell are you coming to the front lines with us?!

Jaune: ...

Jaune: I WANT TO SEE DEATH.

----------------------------------

Ren: We're finally here, Jaune. We finally made it as huntsmen. Do you have any regrets?

Jaune: No. It was either this or med school.

Ren: I... wasn't aware you wanted to be a doctor. What was going to be your specialty?

Jaune: (Wide grin) EUTHANASIA.

----------------------------------

Coco: I'm open to suggestions.

Nora: Let's give all of our weapons to Ruby and have her use them to build a giant rifle-toting, sword-swinging mecha.

Coco: What is this, a fucking anime? No!

Blake: We could always give up and run away.

Coco: No!

Ruby: Let's play Arrowfell!

Coco: NO, GOD DAMMIT! NO! Does anyone have any good ideas?!

Ren: Jaune has one.

Coco: ...Dear god. Alright. How bad is it?

Jaune: This is an old revenge fantasy I used to reenact with dolls.

Yatsuhashi: Holy shit, this guy is fucked.

Jaune: In my most elaborate schemes, I'd pretend the dolls could see me before stabbing their eyes out and burning them alive.

Fox: ...Jaune, has anyone ever told you that you have an unhealthy obsession with ocular trauma?

Jaune: It's like closing the windows to the souls!

Cardin: You know, if we shoot out the Grimm eyes, we could finish them off without losing anyone.

Pyrrha: Jaune, you are the creepiest fucking guy I've ever met, but hey, that's not a bad plan.

----------------------------------

Nora: Jaune, can I ask you something?

Jaune: Sure!

Nora: This is going to sound stupid, but... Let's say I, hypothetically, have romantic feelings for a fake brother-

Jaune: You mean Ren?

Nora: Yeah, whatever. But let's say I acted on those feelings. Would it... Would it be wrong?

Jaune: Nora, why are you asking me about socially moral protocol?

Nora: Because you're the only one I can trust to not tell anyone. And even if you did, everyone would just assume you're being a creep again and I could deny everything.

Jaune: Wow, Nora. That's cold, dark, and manipulative genius.

Nora: I'm sorry, I just really need to know.

Jaune: I've never seen you in this light before.

Nora: Is it wrong?

Jaune: Hey, can I have a lock of your hair?

Nora: Answer my question, Jaune!

Jaune: Alright, alright! Look, the way I see it, I don't see anything wrong with your feelings, Nora. He wasn't really your family anyways, so even if you did incest-bang, it would've been fine.

Nora: It's not incest!

Jaune: I know, I know! I just prefer to think of it that way!

Nora: ...

Jaune: Bitch, don't even give me that look. You already KNEW what you were getting into asking me for advice!

----------------------------------

Marrow: General, wait!

Ironwood: God dammit, Wags, not now!

Marrow: General, Huntsman Ren and Pine along with Huntress Valkyrie are invaluable soldiers, and thus are completely expendable. But you should know that Huntsman Arc is said to be one of the most fucked up people on Remnant!

Jaune: (Thinking) No! They found my secret!.

Ironwood: Oh, really?

Jaune: Act normal- (Meow) NO, MISTER WHISKERS! NOT NOW!.

Ironwood: And just how fucked up are we talking?

Jaune: (Twitching hard) GET YOUR LITTLE CLAWS OUT OF MY EYES~!.

Marrow: Fucked up enough, some say, to rival even you, General.

Ironwood: ...To rival me, you say?

Ironwood: JAUNE ARC!

Jaune: MEOW!

Ironwood: Is what they say true?! Are you truly a fucked up little shit?!

Jaune: Well, I think I'm perfectly normal, but I may have a few desires and tendencies some may classify as... off?

Ironwood: ...Okay, Huntsman Arc. We're going to play a little game, and if you lose, the survival of both yourself and your friends over there, too!

Jaune: Sir, this is a horrendous abuse of authority-!

Ironwood: SILENCE!

Ironwood: Jaune Arc, I challenge you to a personal duel to the death! We shall fight with words to determine once and for all who is the most fucked up human being on the planet!

Jaune: (Huffs) Okay, this? I can do!

Jaune: I PLAY WITH HUMAN DOLLS!

Ironwood: I PLAY WITH HUMAN LIVES!

Jaune: I laugh at death!

Ironwood: I worship Salem on the weekends!

Jaune: SALEM! WORSHIPS! ME!

Ironwood: I lick tears off of orphans!

Jaune: I call arson a career!

Ironwood: I joined the military to watch people die!

Jaune: I celebrate living failure!

Ironwood: I submit to certain death!

Jaune: I harass the elderly!

Ironwood: I dip my soldiers with disease!

Jaune: I throw rocks at the homeless!

Ironwood: Oh yeah? Well, you wouldn't know anything about this because you're a virgin, but casualties are my favorite form of sexual foreplay! (Jaune stunned) YES! HAHAHA! Foolish child! You thought you could match wits with the worst of us and win?! You played the cards of a petulant boy, Jaune Arc, and now you and your little bitch friends will die!

Jaune: (Looks to his team)

Nora: (Thinking) You can do it, Jaune!.

Ren: (Thinking) There's no one I've ever met who's creeper than you!.

Jaune: You thought you were fighting a mere moral? You thought you could probe the darkness that is my mind?!.

Jaune: FOOL! I SHALL DROWN IN THE MAELSTROM OF MY NIGHTMARES! MY TENTACLES SHALL TWIST AND CONTORT YOUR THROAT AS I THROTTLE YOU WITH VISIONS OF HERMAPHRODITIC SUCCUBI AND VIOLENT! OEDIPEDAL! RAPE FANTASIES!

Jaune: I will take your cities! I will subjugate your children! I will rape and devour your armies! But you, only you shall survive, so that you may bear testament to my will and ultimate revengeance!

Atlas: ...

Vale: ...

Vacuo: ...

Mistral: ...

Salem: ...

[skidsspace]

The Tai discourse is back. And honestly? I agree with points from both sides. Tai loves his kids. Tai also neglected his kids. These are points that can't be denied by either side. I would say...Tai is not a bad dad. But Tai is not a great dad. We've seen both in this series and Tai falls somewhere in between. When Yang says "He just kind of shut down" people like to say she said kind of not fully. But...well of course she did. These girls never outright insult their father and she was only trying to connect to Blake. The picture we see on screen is Tai sitting in his room staring at a picture. It also can't be ignored that Yang managed to get a sleeping toddler into a wagon and out the house and somewhere in the woods before anyone was able to find them. I'm sorry but that takes time. Yang is only two years older than ruby. A 5 year old is gonna have trouble lifting a 3 year old. And Yang felt the need to bring ruby anyway. So Tai either wasn't home or...wasn't paying attention. Neither great. And it was Qrow that found them. But it can't be ignored that the Boba thing means Tai was present again.

I think what it is, truly is with Tai, is that he doesn't know how to deal with the big hard emotions. Like when he calls yangs depression moping or he shuts down himself. He himself couldn't handle his own depression let alone his daughters. He doesn't know how to have those talks or how to give a hand up, After all Summer is the one who came and gave him a hand after Raven left. So he makes jokes and tries to push them onward. And Yang adopted making jokes for hard situations from him. Ren calls her on it. She learned it from Tai. She picked up on him doing it to handle hard moments.

It's not the greatest thing. It's not. But from what I've seen Tai is not the worst dad and also isn't the best. I don't know if we can say he tried his best but I think we can say he did try. Tai loves his kids. But he doesn't know how to handle big, hard emotional moments.

[kitkatopinions]

I love when anti-rwde posters unintentionally say things that seem rwde lol. Here are my favorites so far:

The always good "Ironwood was always clearly an evil dictator" If this were true it would make the show worse than I already think it is, because not only did Team RWBY willingly work with him without any sort of recognition that it might be bad of them, but the writers have also talked about Ironwood's good intentions and the fall to villainy and how they wanted V7 to have no clear bad guy.

Whenever someone dismisses any early season as unimportant or something that no longer matters. Like, my guy, they're all supposed to matter and make up a good story together.

The people that say that the Blake and Yang ship is the exact same as Blake x Sun as a reason for why people who ship Blake with Sun but not Yang are wrong. Idk if they realize characters and dynamics are meant to be different and interesting.

The people who find redesigns of Yang where she's wearing clothing that's either the exact same level of 'modest' as the show or actually less sexualized and yell about how re-writers always overly sexualize Yang.

The people that defend every Jaune scene by saying he's just as much of a main character as Ruby. Like yes thank you for proving our point lol.

The people that constantly say important things just happen off screen. Things like main characters being friends, communicating important plot details to each other, showing grief at terrible deaths, unlearning racism... The more stuff people say happened off screen the more unintentionally insulting I think they're being because instead of saying "It was a mistake, they didn't have time, or they forgot" it's "they willfully didn't include it because they couldn't be bothered."

The people that say it's a good thing the entirety of Atlas was destroyed. Like personally I think the show could've done better at making Atlas and Mantle more varied but actually DID make it clear there were working class people and Faunus and good people just trying to make it that lived in Atlas and didn't deserve to lose everything. But apparently these people believe everyone in Atlas was some rich selfish asshole who deserved it and that would be very flimsy and bad writing.

The people who say that "drinking the tea" and "going to the tree" in V9 is actually just a metaphor for therapy. Like I know that Ruby essentially tried to commit suicide in V9. But I guess what they think what happened is that Neo was beating up Ruby while trying to make her get therapy, and everyone being a moment too late was them not arriving in time to stop Ruby from going to therapy, and when she fell down into the darkness that was symbolic of driving to her therapist's office, and when Yang was worried that Ruby wouldn't be herself anymore she actively was unhappy that Ruby was at therapy. Like how much worse written would V9 be if I actually believed what they did? XD

The people that insist that everything in RWBY was part of some super well thought out 'planned from the beginning' thing. Not only is that actually not a flex with a show that feels more disjointed, rushed, and ill-thought through with every season, but it's actively not what the writers say half the time when they do things like talk about how they 'wrote themselves into corners' and admit that at the beginning they were 'throwing things out and having to stick with it,' and having Blake's VA describe Blake as straight in official stuff and how they entirely reinvented Robin. Like either you think everything was not planned from the beginning or you think the writers are liars lol.

The people that actively just pretend or actually believe that the show is different than what it is, like the person who said RWBY was 'written by and for queer people' or the person who said Blake and Yang had been openly dating since V2 or the person who said Ruby was shown grieving Pyrrha way more than Jaune or the person who said that the RWBY villains were straight white men who weren't part of oppressed groups. What better way to prove that you actually don't like the show you're watching than to insist that it's a completely different show?

I'm sure there's more but those are the ones on my mind right now. XD Once again, I am certain that I have more love for RWBY than a lot of anti-rwde posters do.

[octopiys]

I'm back with more incorrect quotes pt. I've lost count

Anyone on the team: captain, I screwed up, big time.

Price, with his head in his hands: boys, given your daily life experiences, you’re gonna have to be more specific.

-

Ghost: *casually taking four stairs at a time*

Soap, falling behind, taking two stairs at a time: Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fu-

-

Soap: Next time I'm at the pet store, I'm gonna take a hamster and drop it in the scorpion cage. I wanna see what a hamster's face looks like when it goes, "oh, fuck."

-

König: That was so hot, Horangi.

Horangi: I literally called the person who just flirted with you a degenterate dog and told them I hope they get dragged through the streets.

König: I'm so in love with you.

-

Roach, planning an undercover op: You cannot be Blake Bortles.

König: Fine! Then I’ll be Jake-

Gaz, under his breath: Don’t say Jortles.

König: Jortles! And I work at the molotov cocktail department.

-

Roach: The moon looks beautiful, doesn’t it?

Soap, looking at Roach: Yeah… but do you know what’s more beautiful?

Roach and Soap in unison: *sighs* Ghost

-

Graves, grinning: Before you were what?

Rodolfo: Before I was-

Graves: What?

Rodolfo: Before I was inter-

Graves: Before you were interrupted?

Rodolfo: Cut me off one more time and I swear I'll-

Graves: What?

Rodolfo: *goes completely silent*

Alejandro, nervously: Stop that. Before he hurts you.

-

Shepherd: But who gets which pencil?

Price: Since they're my things, I get the good one, Nikolai gets the broken one and you don't get one because fuck you.

-

Price: Do you guys ever have a civilized conversation that doesn't require insulting each other every time you get a chance?

Alejandro: No.

Graves: No.

Price: Didn't think so.

-

Ghost: *tapping fingers on table*

Soap: *taps fingers back furiously*

Gaz: …What’s going on?

Price: Morse code. They’re talking.

Ghost: -.-- ..- .-. / - …. . / -.-. ..- - . … -

Soap: *slams hands on table* YOU TAKE THAT BACK!

[bluesest]

A House

Even in a place where you can do your private activities in peace it is not safe if the people who live there are enemies among them. In one home lived a "happy" family made up of the mother, father and… 4 brothers, exactly, a total nightmare especially if you are the youngest of them all:

Thomas: The oldest brother, he wears a red t-shirt with tight shorts almost all the time, he has a relaxed attitude with his family and nervous with other people, his hair is brown and he has a bit of a chin, he is the tallest among the 4.

Blake: The second brother, he is the toughest of them all, he always wanders around the house shirtless showing off his strong pectorals worthy of a gymbro, his sweaty smell floods the house and he is the least shy of them all when it comes to "basic needs".

Tony: The third brother, the most behaved of them all, always obedient to what his parents or Thomas tell him, he gets along somewhat badly with Blake thanks to their clashing personalities, however, they get to enjoy each other's company in different activities.

Alain: The fourth brother and the youngest, his personality is a combination of Blake's rebelliousness and cunning with Tony's shyness, he does not like to obey his other brothers despite being older and the orders of his parents: "Thomas is in charge", it is not that he does not like to listen, but he hates his brothers, they are cruel to him because he is the youngest of all, the most defenseless.

Life at home was hell for Alain, he heard several insults from his siblings, teasing and pranks, many times locking him in a basement just for fun, but his favorite activity is to take Alain's lunch, usually his mother would make desserts for the siblings and when she wasn't looking, they would take Alain's part and eat it threatening him that he was a little girl who can't take any jokes, this stopped Alain from expressing this situation to his parents because according to him: "I am not a whiny little girl".

One day like any other, Alain suffered from another cruel joke that included water balloons, his siblings mocked him again while with fury Alain went up to the second floor of the house where the bathroom was located, closed the door and began to dry his face with a white towel.

"Why won't they leave me alone?"

"I wish I could get revenge."

Suddenly his father Todd who was a man in his 40's, wearing glasses, dressed in a white t-shirt and was standing with a towel covering his hips as he enters the bathroom:

Todd: "Whoops, I didn't know it was occupied."

Alain: "I'm just drying my face dad, besides, don't you have your own bathroom?"

Todd: "I just came to take one thing out of here, you go on…wait why are you wet?"

Alain didn't want to answer that question, luckily a strange sound interrupted them both: *PPPFFT*. A wet fart appeared in the bathroom:

Alain: "Oh come on dad!"

Todd: "Oopsssss it slipped out son, sorry hahahahaha…"

Alain: "The smell isn't even normal!"

Todd: "Sorry, but recently I've been having problems with my own plumbing, I couldn't get all the crap out of me, I was constipated so I bought a laxative and it's taking effect. I only came here because when I finished my business, well, let's just say I didn't quite calculate how much toilet paper I would need, so I came here to borrow some." Alain: "I mean, your ass wrapped in a towel isn't… clean?"

Todd: "Yeah, but it's going to get even dirtier in a few minutes anyway, that fart was just a warning."

Alain: "DAAAAAAAAD!"

Todd: "Alright, I'll leave you alone."

Todd walked out of the bathroom closing the door leaving Alain in privacy again, "That really was embarrassing…wait a minute…that's it!" a bright idea crossed Alain's mind, "How about now they are the ones who will have an embarrassing moment…when they have diarrhea outside the house!"

Discreetly Todd walked into his parents' room and noticed two things: the horrible smell and the miralax laxative on the nightstand, he quietly picked it up and took it from there ready to begin his plan: "Intoxicate my siblings will be easy, they take all my food, I just have to find a way to make them Leave the house… right! They each have things to do out of here just for this day, so I have to take advantage of the situation!"

Alain arrived in the kitchen where with his skills he cooked one of the few desserts he knew how to make thanks to his mother: Brownies. After an hour and a half, they were finally ready, they looked great and smelled good, they were definitely not going to resist.

He walked around the house with the plate full of 9 brownies, when he got to the second floor he is seen by Tony while he was in his room, he approached him and said:

Tony: "Where did you get those, little guy?"

Alain: "Mom baked them for me and my friends coming over later."

Tony: "Isn't mommy supposed to have gone shopping?"

Alain: "Yes…b-but she left them baking and ordered me to take them out."

Blake appears on the scene:

Blake: "Do I smell chocolate? Give me some, little guy"

Alain: "They're for my friends!"

Blake: "I wasn't asking you!"

Both brothers began to struggle, Tony catching the falling brownies while Blake tried to pry the desserts out of Alain's hands, while Alain pretended that he really didn't want them taken away. With one more stretch of strength, Blake emerged with the victory by retrieving a plate of 6 brownies while Tony held 3 with his hands.

Alain: "Give them back to me."

Blake: "Or what, you're going to cry?"

Thomas appears annoyed in the hallway:

Thomas: "Stop yelling! You won't let me study in peace you assholes!"

Tony: "Excuse Alain, he's crying because Blake is bothering him."

Alain: "I'm not crying!"

Thomas: "Oh, and those goodies you got Blake?"

Blake: "Mom made them for the little girl, she wouldn't give them to me so I'm going to keep them to teach her a lesson about sharing."

Thomas: "Obviously that lesson involves me, give me some bro". Being 9, Blake hands out 3 to each brother, he starts eating and the taste is exceptional, albeit a little strange to the taste of mom's brownies, but they are still brownies, who cares if they have laxative in the recipe, right? He was followed by Thomas and Tony who more slowly enjoyed every bite of the dessert until in the blink of an eye they had finished it all.

Tony: "You really showed off with this treat bro."

Blake: "You know how I am, always so charitable to the poor needy souls."

Tony: "That's weird, the only one who looks like a shirtless bum here is you."

Blake: "Oops how dapper sir ("I need to scent the bathroom after I leave")"

Thomas: "Stop arguing, and let's thank the little girl scout for those delicious Brownies."

The three brothers in tandem thanked, "Thank you so much Alain!", Alain on the outside was frustrated and in real anger due to the insults and sarcasm, but inside his mind he thought, "Thank you to you"

Each brother after an hour left the home to go about their own business:

Thomas:

He arrived at the university in a bus, he had to take an important exam which he had been preparing for all week, it was difficult but not enough to overshadow his relaxed attitude. He set foot on campus and the first gurgles began:

He put a hand to his stomach, "It's just gas," paused for a moment, bent his knees a little thanks to the pain and:

*PPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTT*

"Wow", a long fart filled the fresh air, luckily there was no one around and besides it was still outside the premises, the smell was free in nature while Thomas without taking importance to this first warning headed to his classroom.

"Lucky it's only one hour of exam and I'll be back home, I hate going to this place on Saturdays"

*GGGGRGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR*

The teacher arrived, a man in his 60's, skinny and with white hair, he was wearing a formal uniform and square glasses, with a serious look he gave the start of the exam.

"This is the A, This is The C, and this…this one will be random."

*GRRRRRRRRRRRR*

"Oghhh, again I have to…can I hold on!" *GRRRRRRRRRGRGGRGGGG* *GRRRRRRRRR*

"Nope, I can't, I'm just going to release some pressure by stretching and… *GRRRRRRRR* oh no…"

*pffffffftttt*

A silent fart came out of Thomas' sweaty ass, "I wish no one had heard it… or smelled it *GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR* oh… what's happening to me?"

*GGGGRGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR* *ppppffffffttttttttTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT.*

The final crash of the buttocks caused by the pressurized air echoed and it was obvious that some people noticed the noise and the rotten smell, "Will it be last night's lasagna… or… those brownies?"

*GGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR*

"Whatever it is it's wreaking havoc in my gut *pffffffttttttt* I need to get this over with."

Thomas with sweat on his forehead set out to solve the exam as fast as possible, every minute that passed was suffering, in his head there were two worries: failing the exam because of his urgency or making a fool of himself in front of his peers with disgusting, loud farts heralding an even worse climax.

*pffftttttt PPPFFFFFttttttttttttttt* *GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR*.

Time was ticking away, 20 minutes to go and Thomas had 80 questions solved, his stomach was making it known how upset he was as he released increasingly raucous air, small voices could be heard opining on the recent change of atmosphere in the room, the professor although looking just as annoyed as every day you could tell he also noticed the smell and possibly who was causing it, or at least that was what Thomas thought.

With 15 minutes left before the end, Thomas handed the test to a disgruntled teacher, then walking out of the room, closed the door and *PPPPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFTFTTTTTTTTTTTT* a huge fart echoed through the halls, Thomas knew he needed a bathroom, "No way I'm going to the bathrooms here, maybe someone will hear me…" and running he headed to the bus stop to return to the comfort of his home.

Blake:

Like his brother, Blake took the bus, not to go take some silly test, but to meet his friends at the usual gym. On the bus he started to feel a slight stomach ache: "Must be the protein shake I took" he lifted his body a little and *PPFFFFTTTTTT* a short but loud fart was present on the bus, many people frowned at such a display of impoliteness from our gymbro, while he didn't flinch at all, it was the smell of a real man.

10 minutes passed and he finally arrived at the gym, upon entering he saw his two teammates getting ready for arm day (yep, a Saturday).

Blake: "Hey don't start without me!"

"Then take this barbell and get started bro!"

Blake sat down and with one arm did several reps, sweat was in the air, *GGGRGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR*, Blake stopped, set the barbell aside and held his stomach.

"What's wrong bro?"

Blake: "Something's wrong with my stomach, I think…"

*PPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTT*

A stormy fart came out of him, even the weight bed couldn't properly catch the smell, his friends laughed along with him, but inside Blake knew something was wrong, but he wouldn't ruin his Saturday of arms and He continued with the reps.

"Wow it sure does stink."

"Yeah, it looks like your pipe is clogged with something and wants to get rid of all the crap you eat."

Blake: "Shut up, if yours are worse".

"No way bro"

Twenty more minutes passed and the pain wouldn't stop, Blake felt several gases inside him that for some reason he couldn't release, his tight sleeveless shirt was completely sweaty, not from a few simple repetitions, but from the pain and heaviness he felt.

"Hey, hand me that weight that's at your feet Blake."

Blake got up from the seat, moved forward a couple of steps and crouched down, a big mistake:

*PPPPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT.*

A big wet fart came out of his big butt, the smell spread quickly disgusting even his own buddies.

"Dude! What was that?"

Blake: "I think I have diarrhea…"

Blake held his belly and walked slowly to the gym bathroom, however, these were under maintenance, with no choice, he said goodbye to his gymbros and waited at the bus stop to get home.

Tony:

He didn't have any special activity, every Saturday he always went to the park to get some relaxation from the dystopian home he lived in, he usually feels bad about what they do to his younger brother Alain, but he can't do much about it, he had to be the laughing stock of his other two brothers (especially Blake) until Alain finally grew up, At that moment they treated him more like one of their own, like a brother.

He arrived at a wooden bench in front of a small duck pond, thought about his life, how unlike his brothers, he had never had a partner in his life, it sounded nice, but it was obvious that, if he continued with those attitudes of a shy boy, he would never achieve anything with anyone.

His thoughts were cut off when a familiar sound came: *GRRRRRR* a small gurgle was present bringing with it an incredible acidity, to distract himself from that he decided to resume his walk, "Should I have eaten those brownies? Is that what's causing this heartburn? Was it the chocolate? Sugar? Or the guilt I feel?" 

He paused for a few seconds, closed his eyes, and... *PPPFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTTT*

"Wow, almost and I look like Blake's lol"

The acidity hit him even harder, Tony started sweating when another fart escaped from him: *PPPPFTFFFTFTTFTFTFTF*, it was a hot one, his rectum was starting to burn.

"I think, if it was the brownies, what did they have?"

He bent his knees as another flurry of farts attacked him: *PPPFFFFFFFTTTTTTGT* *PPPFFTFTTFTFTFTFTFTFTF* *GRRRRRRR* *ppftffttftftftftfPPPPPPTPHTTRTRT*

Tony has always had a pretty sensitive stomach compared to his siblings: "I think I need a bathroom right now," his walk went up a notch to become a race with the toilet in his house being the goal, there was no way he would go to those portable toilets in the park.

As he ran the farts became more persistent, smelly and wet, little by little Tony could feel an amorphous mass forming in his intestines struggling to get out.

*PPPFTFTFTFTFTF* *PFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFT* *PPFFFFFTTTT* *PPPFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFT*

Each step meant another exasperating fart announcing the inevitable, before accepting defeat and starting to defecate his beautiful pants, he could see the patio of his house where he could see his sweaty brother Blake.

At Home:

Tony: "Blake, what are you doing here?"

Blake: "I came back from the gym because I'm literally about to have a bout of diarrhea"

Tony: "You too?"

Blake: "I was at the gym when a greasy fart came out of me without warning, I felt my anus burn and the smell..."

Tony: "Ok I got it, I don't need explanations" *PPPFPFFTTFTFTFT*

Blake: "Just like that"

Tony: "Shut up"

After exchanging insults, Thomas' bus arrived and he ran downstairs holding his stomach ignoring his brothers, he tried to open the door, but it was locked.

Thomas: "BUT WHY IS THIS DAMN DOOR LOCKED!?"

Blake: "Wow calm down bro"

Thomas: "YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND! I NEED TO GET TAR OUT OF MY ANUS RIGHT NOW."

Tony: "Like everybody... One minute... the brownies"

Blake: "You think Alain..."

Thomas: "THAT BASTARD WILL PAY ME *GRRRRRRRRRR* after I sit on the porcelain"

The three brothers yelled at Alain from outside the house, while he watched them through the window suffering, it was so amusing that his "Super Cool" brothers were begging for his mercy trying to contain the monsters inside.

The brothers were looking for some entrance that Alain had forgotten, but there was no such thing, in desperation, Blake had an idea:

Blake: "Guys I can't take it anymore *Started walking while undressing*"

Thomas: "Where are you going? *PPPFTFFTFTFT*"

He went to a small bush in front of his house and...

*PPFFTFTFTFTFFT* *PPSHSHPSSSSSSHHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHHSHSHSHSHSHFTTT* *QSHHQHQHHQSHQSHQSHQSHQSHSQ* *PFTFTFTFTFT* *PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS*

Tony: "WHAT THE!"

Blake: "Leaves are natural, not porcelain"

*PPFTTFTFTFTTFTFTFTFT* *SQHHSQHSHSHSQHSHSHSHSHQHHQSHSHSHS* 

Thomas: "Leave me a place bro"

Blake: "There's always a place for the bro family"

Thomas began to undress until a few drops of diarrhea stained his shoes, which changed his mind to look for another alternative.

Thomas: "Maybe I can ask the neighbors to use their bathroom"

Blake: "You miss it *HSHQSHQHSHSHSQHSHSHSHSHSH*, hey Tony, do you want to come with me?"

Tony: "I'll find another *GRRRRR* entry"

The two brothers parted ways, Thomas stepped on the neighbor's lawn when he felt his diarrhea about to come out, he rang the doorbell hoping for some answer, a young boy opened the door and greeted him:

Neighbor: "Hi Thomas! What can I do for you?"

Thomas was surprised by the fact that his neighbor knew his name and he didn't know his neighbor's, but there was no time to ask.

Thomas: "Good afternoon Neighbor, this is embarrassing, but can I use your bathroom please?"

His neighbor couldn't believe it, the reason he knew Thomas' name, even though the two of them didn't socialize was because he was deeply in love with him, and that, overnight, the love of your life knocked on your door and asked to use your bathroom urgently was a stroke of luck that wasn't going to be wasted by him.

Neighbor: "Go ahead, the bathroom is on the second floor"

Thomas started to run, but his speed was cut short by the pain and the strength needed for his legs to contain the demons inside, with both hands he began to hold his stomach and began to bend slowly, the neighbor asked if Thomas was okay and with a tired and weakened voice said: "No"

*PFGTFTFTTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFT* *QSHSHSHQHSHSHSQHQSHSHSHSHHS* *PFTFTTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTTTTTTTTTF* *RPPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFT*

Thomas shit his pants at his neighbor's house, with his neighbor nearby staring at him, Thomas was embarrassed, sweating profusely and another seizure began:

*PRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPR* *PSPSPSSHSHSHSHSHSHHHHHHHHH* *PFTFTFTFTFT* *PPPFFTFTFTTFTFTFTFTFTF* *PPPPPSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS*

Thomas: "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to"

Neighbor: "No... Don't apologize, this can happen to anyone, and it doesn't bother me either..."

Thomas: "Oh... *PSHHSPSHSSHHPSHPSHSPHPHSHPSPHPHPHSSHHHHHHHHHHPRPRPRPR*"

Neighbor: "Don't worry, I'll help you clean up later, let me... Blow... to the bathroom..."

Thomas: "Thank you..."

While this was happening, Tony was desperate, he was about to take the free place of Blake's bush until he saw something peculiar, the window that looked into his parents' room was open, something that reminded him that when he and his brothers were looking, that window was totally closed, did Alain take pity on him?, one more growl alerted him and very carefully opened the window completely and entered as slowly as possible to Let nothing from the inside be expelled to the outside without warning.

He entered the silent room, ran to the half-open door of his parents' bathroom, the urgency was so great that he did not notice the smell of the room and neither did the fact that his father was sitting on the throne.

They were both frightened, Tony covered his eyes and wanted to leave the spacious bathroom until he was stopped by his father's voice:

Todd: "Son, why did you come in through the window?"

Tony: "The house was totally locked, so I decided to come in here and use your bathroom dad."

Todd: "And why not use yours?"

Tony: "That's what I'm going to do at this... *PFPFPPPFPFFTFTFTTFTTF* moment"

Todd: "Looks like your *PLOP* knows what happened to my laxative, huh?"

Tony: "Laxative!? *GRRRRRRRRR* that bastard... Aghhh I can't even take a step, I'm going to shit on the floor."

Todd: "Of course not, use this bathroom"

After a choppy fart, Todd got up from the toilet unashamedly showing off his long, hairy penis to his son Tony: "All yours champ."

Tony: "You're going to clean up... or?"

Todd: "I Still Feel Like My Stomach Is Still Cooking, I'm Not Going To Waste Paper"

Tony ignoring the image in his head of his father's stained buttocks, began to undress in embarrassment as he approached the toilet, the water was brown, in the center was a large sausage, apparently several days old in Todd's stomach, Tony uncomfortably sat his pale butt on the sweaty and hot toilet lid:

*PFFFFFFFFFFTFTFTFTTFTFTFTF* *QSHHSHSQHSHSQHHSQHSHSQH* *PLOP* *PLOP* *PLOP* *PRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPR* *PLOP* *PLOP* *PRRRRRRPSPSPSSSSSSSSSSS*

Tony: "AGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH"

Todd: "You weren't lying about the urgency..." 

Tony: "Not now, Dad..."

*PRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPR* *QSGQQSHHSQHHQSHQHHSQSQ* *PPFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTTFFF* *GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR*

Todd: "Not even I, who have been constipated, have come to that, you can be a champion!"

Tony: "I want to die..."

*PLOP* *PLOP* *PLOP* PPPPFFTFTTFTFTFTFTFTFPPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPPRPRPRP* *QSHHSQHSHSQHHSHHSHSQQH* *PPSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS*

After 5 minutes, Tony's stomach calmed down enough to leave his father's bathroom and continue in his own. 

Todd: "Well done son, now save me a spot, I feel like I'm going to break your record in a few seconds."

Tony got up and didn't clean himself, he turned around and saw the mess, the brown soup increased in size where several sections had different consistencies, colors and smells, and from this stood out his father's sausage now bathed in Tony's diarrhea.

When Tony left the room he saw Blake waving at him from the window, Tony covered his crotch and opened the door for him:

Blake: "Did you shit on yourself? And how did you get in?"

Tony: "None of your business..."

Blake: "After Tony arrives, the three of us show Alain who he's playing..."

Finally, after 1 hour, Thomas arrived with clothes borrowed from his neighbor, he didn't want to talk to anyone and locked himself in his room.

P.S. This will be the story that starts the week-long daily story marathon.

[lovingdabeessss]

The part of the confession that’s like “you didn’t really like me at first” thing where they pretend they were at all enemies to lovers (they had one (1) awkward moment)

always reminds me of how i always did kinda wish they had a bit of a slower start to really being comfortable around each other (still having that instant chemistry tho)

just cause Blake thinks everything’s some sort of manipulation tactic (because of Adam) and Yang is just being what she believes isn’t even nice just normal

Like Yang notices Blake doesn’t have breakfast so she goes out of her way to get her a fruit or something while she’s already getting something for herself maybe gets Blake tea when she’s getting coffee

Not cause she’s feeling particularly kind that’s just what she thinks is normal to do for someone

And Blake thinks she’s trying to get something from her cause why else would she be doing DAILY unasked tasks for her???? That’s crazy?? It’s even the tea she likes!!! That stalker!! (she just paid attention to her favorite tea)

And Yang is just so confused about why this girl is acting so weird?? Like why wouldn’t Yang do these things?? Does she expect her to be inconsiderate?? Is she MAD that she’s doing the bare minimum (it’s a bit more) for her?? Why does she assume yangs the kind of person to manipulate people?? That’s so insulting (it’s a trauma response Yang leave her alone)

And Blake speaks against it but continues to drink it and eat the orange so Yang keeps doing it cause why not

I love the idea of them before they start actually getting any identifiable feelings for each other

Like Yang being nice just cause that’s who she is and Blake being confused and even then it feels super natural to hang out and be around each other so even if they confuse each so they just spend all their time together till they’re comfortable

[thewritersofdeceased]

If you do the black phone still can I request Headcanons on their s/o (female) being unserious and laughs at almost everything and is very giggly?

This was fun to write!! I love writing tbp requests guys its sm fun to me! I’ll be so honest, i was watching aphmau(which i'll be taking requests for now!) while doing this, so i was having a whole load of fun :3!! 

|| THE BLACK PHONE BOYS WITH A REALLY GIGGLY S/O! ||

FINNEY BLAKE

Finney has a 50/50 reaction when it comes to his s/o being super giggly! It really depends on the situation

If it’s a situation where either of them gets hurt, for example, tripping or something, he’s a little bit confused as to why your laughing

Until he realizes it’s the “laugh first ask later” type of thing

But of course he makes sure you’re okay! He’d feel bad if you were really injured with it.

If you’re just super giggly, he doesn’t mind! Just unless it comes to school.

Definitely uses your giggly personality to his advantage and stuff, especially during pillow fights and tickle wars!

Yes. He gets dragged into the pillow fights mostly by Gwen.

ROBIN ARELLANO

Robin's a little bit confused about being supper giggly, but he's not mad about it at all!

He's just used to being super focused on his fights, so he enjoys the change of having a giggly partner! it's actually really refreshing to him

like Finney, he uses the giggly personality to his advantage, all the tickle fights and everything of the sort

Would beat the living fuck out of anyone who said it was childish to be super giggly or any insulting words (those are usually from Moose)

Again, laugh first ask later type of person unless it’s super SUPER serious injuries

He buys you silly bandaids just to hear your laugh!

BRUCE YAMADA

Has no issue with your giggly personality! In fact, he matches it! He has a younger sister, so he’s used to outgoing and giggly kinds of situations!

Your laughter and just smile in general is his motivation to win any of his baseball games, he just loves your smile and giggles so much!

He has no issue trying to make you laugh, but of course he makes sure you're okay! He couldn't bear the thought of you getting hurt then laughing it off. well- he can, but of course he's worried about it!

He's definitely the type of person who'll like- copy? If that makes sense! So if he hangs around someone for too long he'll do the same?

For example because I'm bad at explaining, if your super giggly and Bruce hangs around you for a while, he'll eventually start to be a bit more giggly and outgoing!

VANCE HOPPER

Vance is on the "what the fuck is going on" side between the super giggly personality, as he's more used to super serious situations (for example, him always getting in trouble with the cops and everything, getting into fights)

He likes hearing your laugh, dont' get him wrong! he's just not the type of person to get all giggly or laugh much himself. after all, not a lot of people trust him since he's always getting into fights and such.

He enjoys the difference between you two! He enjoys the opposites sort of vibe you two have.

He would willingly beat the shit out of anyone who tries to make fun of your giggly personality. Like Moose for example :]

He's not one to join any pillow fights or anything, he prefers to be much more on the "just relax and let me hear your stupid jokes" side of the relationship

In general, a 7/10 when it comes to his s/o being super giggly!

BILLY SHOWALTER

Billy's similair to Finney for this one, super confused!

But he enjoys the giggles once he finds out it's just your personality!

He loves hearing your laugh when you're playing with Harper, since Harper's usually a super energetic dog!

Definitely takes you to carnivals and loves hearing your laughs at those glass house mirrors (like the silly and funky ones!)

Hearing you laugh while he's making silly faces in photos or anything is like his #1 goal in life

Billy loves you so much that he would definitely send you silly notes during class(he only hopes it doesn't get you two in trouble)

He'd also start laughing if you two ever get a stern lecture, just because of how unserious you are

GRIFFIN STAGG

Griffin's not used to unserious or giggly people, as he's usually self-reserved and quiet with his nose in a book

If you asked him a character that reminded him of you, he'd say Pinkie Pie automatically

He enjoys the silly and outgoing personality you seem to have, he has no issue with it!

He thinks his mother would've loved you, as your the reason he's getting out of the house!

Griffin has NO problem having Vance beat the hell out of someone for making fun of you

[bunny-bomb]

Watched too much Blake Jennings and felt inspired to make this.

Warning! Includes talk of characters using the f slur! If you're uncomfortable with that I would not recommend reading this!

Characters: Alex , Avery , Bailey , Black Wolf , Eden , Great Hawk , Kylar , Whitney , Robin , and Sydney

Alex : Can say it but, like Leah from Stardew valley, when they say it they mean the legal definition (a bundle of sticks). Doesn’t really care if you say it as long as you’re gay.

Avery : Will call you it if/when they’re pissed off enough at you. Also calls their client/coworkers it when complaining to you.

Bailey : Calls you it when you fail to pay them on time. They call you it when you do pay them too, just not to your face. Uses it about as much as your name, and has to conciously remember not to call you that in public.

Black Wolf : Doesn’t know what the word means and please do not teach him. When the pack finds out from him you’ll hear them calling you it as you wander through the forest.

Eden : Calls you it as an insult until they like you. In which case they will call you it as a compliment.

Great Hawk : Doesn’t know what the word means and won’t use it even if you teach it to them. Partially out of respect for queer people, and partially because they have no reason to use the word

With Kylar it’s either They were called it so much while they were being bullied and beat up that they’ll get panicked and flighty if the word is said in their presence, even if it’s used as a term of endearment for someone else. Has the right to say it but never does as a result.

With the same reasoning as the previous, they call everyone but you that word and mean it with the same vitriolic hatred as a 12 year old boy in a CoD voice chat.

No in betweeen. Both is possible however.

Whitney : Canonically has said it (in reference to cigs but point still stands) and will call you it regardless of if they can. What are you gonna do? Stand up to them? If you’re hanging around them that much chances are you’re probably into that.

Robin won’t say it out of respect for queer people, even though they definitely can. Crossdressing Robin enjoyers unite.

Sydney only said it when asking Jordan/Sirrus what the word meant. Was horrified by the meaning and spent all their spare time praying for salvation for a week straight, having to be dragged off the pews when it was bedtime. They were 15 when this happened and they asked because they overheard Kylar being called it. Thought it just meant “stupid” or “creepy”, since Kylar can definitely be “a bit much” to the uninitiated.

[rachetmath]

Why RWBY Ain't MC?

(Okay if you already seen this ('Jaune More MC Ruby? 'https://rachetmath.tumblr.com/post/744057722669039616/jaune-more-mc-ruby) Then you should know where this is going.)

Jaune: And that's what is wrong with your characters.

RWBY: *shocked* 

Ruby: Oh crap.

Weiss: Oh God…

Blake: My people…

Yang: I am a basic bitch?

Jaune: Yeah you girl's characters are all over the place. Not just that… you have so much screen time yet do nothing with it. You're basically side characters to your own stories. 

Yang: Not true.

Jaune: Yes true. Look let's start with Ruby.

Ruby: Me?

Jaune: Yeah, because some of my character issues should have been yours, like killing Penny for example. Considering that was suitable punishment for what you have done. You lied to James. You drove him off the rails. You and your team made the mess. 

Ruby: Um…

Jaune: But that's too easy. Let's really go down the shit hole. Ruby, you have silver eyes. Yet you barely use them. You never trained with them. We still know nothing about them. And we don’t know if they’ll work on Salem.

Ruby: um…

Jaune: And you know that would have been answered back at Atlas if you went on the battlefield. Speaking of Salem, why the hell would you put Ironwood someone more of my problem than Salem, if I recall knows who your mom is.

Ruby: Well I had to protect Penny.

Jaune: Mhmm. Okay. Speaking of your mom what did you learn about her in The Ever After?

Ruby: Um-

Jaune: Not much. Yeah. And again no villain besides Cinder and Neo were interested in you. Not even you are interested in them considering you barely remember them. Like Ruby, you don't do anything. Like you fast but slow in the head. Hell even Neo ganging up on you, you still didn't deserve it. I actually deserved it.

Ruby: How?

Jaune: Again Pyrrha died. Ozpin died. All because of me. And even if you killed Penny it's still going to feel like my fault because I could've prevented it.

Ruby: Oh no. 

Weiss: Jaune-

Jaune: Nope. Your turn. You are worse than your father.

Weiss: I-

Jaune: You talk about how your father does business but you don’t do business. Nor do you know how to run a business.

Weiss: I mean-

Jaune: You lied to your sister’s face. Your sister who trained you and made sure you were able to leave Atlas. You got Klien fired. You threatened your own brother.

Weiss: Um-. I-i

Jaune: Oh let’s not forget how you destroyed your home and now your family is broke.

Weiss: Well at least I’m a good teammate.

Jaune: Didn’t you almost divide your team about two times? Also, how is everyone insulting me when you barely win your fights?

Weiss: Not true.

Jaune: Flynt Coal.

Weiss: Luck.

Jaune: Vernal.

Weiss: I was rusty.

Jaune: More like spamming.

Weiss: We defeated the Ace-ops.

Jaune: Neo and Cinder. The ones who were supposed to be on the same level as them. Did you win?

Weiss: Shit.

Jaune: You know what I should mention this. In Argus, I must have been under some stress or high as a kite, because now that I think about it, the deal Cordoven gave us, wasn’t that bad.

Weiss: Jaune she was planning to send me back to my father.

Jaune: Alright, then instead of accepting those terms and going to face your father, basically lying claim to your life, you cowardly avoided him and let your friends be what scares him. Not you. In fact, you were willing to endanger yourself and thousands of people to avoid him.

Weiss: … … ….

Jaune: Look I understand you don’t have to face everything alone. But there are some moments you have to deal with alone. Instead of having to escape your father like last time, you could have returned, stood up to him, and left out the front door from which you came in. Why? Because that’s how much you care about your friends and your freedom that you won’t let anybody, especially a man you can easily crush into ground beef take from you.

Weiss: By god. I am my father. 

Jaune: Yeah. Blake.

Blake: *looks at him*

Jaune: Blake, I would be concerned for my people if I were you.

Blake: Why?

Jaune: Well-

Me: Nope. Nope. I’ll explain. Blake, you remember the hound right?

Blake: Yeah.

Blake: A silver-eyed person.

Me: Look at his head.

Blake: “Look at his head”? I mean I see- oh. Oh my god.

Me: Yeah. A faunus. People who have animal-like features.  Again with silver eyes, we know nothing. But Faunuses on the other hand, we know where this could lead to.

Blake: Oh no.

Me: And you single-handedly divided the White Fang. And if hunters or people start siding with Salem, what does that mean for the Faunuses who are now venerable because of you?

Blake: Oh GOD! What have I done?!

Me: I mean I started questioning whether you cared about your people or not. Considering you didn’t bother staying in Mantle to protect them. You trust a criminal more than an official officer or hunter. Even though Robyn was doing the same crap Adam and Roman were doing. Good job.

Blake: *crying*

Me: Now for you.

Yang: Me?

Me: Yes. I never thought I come back for your ass. But here we are. Now then, what the fuck did Raven tell you to do?

Yang: Um.

Me: The same thing your father was telling you to do. Think. Don’t just follow orders. Don’t just act. Think! 

Yang: I did but-

Me: You didn’t think it through.

Yang: Look trusting Robyn-

Me: When you confronted Robyn what was your plan afterwards?

Yang: Um-

Me: Remember you didn’t tell her everything so she was still skeptical. She was tearing James a new one. So what was the point?!

Yang: Um-

Me: I mean, how were you going to chop Ruby off when ultimately you are more at fault than she is?

Yang: Um.

Me: Like at least Ruby was trying to lower the tension. You as per-fucking-usual added way more fuel to an already heated fire.

Yang: Well-

Me: I already mentioned how you are the biggest hypocrite, a simp and horrible sister. Now I might as well say you are the weakest link in your team– no, your squad.  

Yang: Hey-

Me: You've been losing fights.

Yang: Name-

Me: Mercury.

Yang: I beat him.

Jaune: Wasn’t that part of the plan to set you up though?

Yang: Yeah but-

Me: Round two, what happened then?

Yang: They double-teamed me.

Me: Before that you couldn’t land hit on him.

Yang: … … Adam.

Me: 2 v 1. He wasn’t even at his best. Bro was in his feelings.

Yang: The Ace-ops-

Me: Marrow, for one, could’ve ended that fight before it started. Second weren’t they arguing half the battle? Also didn’t Elm have your partner and for “reasons” she decided to let Blake go? Selling the match.

Yang: A win is a win.

Me: Okay Salem. Did you stand your ground and fight?

Yang: Um. Tactical retreat?

Me: She wasn’t even putting in effort. The cat.

Yang: I mean-

Me: Kilgore.

Yang: He does not count.

Me: Neo and Cinder. Again, on Ace-op level.

Yang: Come on, man, she-

Me: A win is a win right? So if you get a ring out or fall that is not victory. Neo won. Two to Zero.

Yang: … … …

Me: Raven… Raven trusted the lamp to you. Not Ruby. You! And you just… you just lost it like that. You fumbled- you fumbled so bad. And what’s crazy is I mentioned how you searched for the deadbeat instead of your “real mom” but it seems Raven is a better mom than Summer now. How? Not only is she alive. She knows what happened to Summer. And she saved your ass so many times. Three times.

Yang: Not-

Me: The train. Your first defeat.

Yang: … ….

Me: I’m not going to count Adam. But she let you leave her tribe camp alive, with your friend no less, knowing full well she didn’t have to help you especially when you came to her and was ready to fight when she wouldn’t give you what you wanted.

Yang: …. …. 

Me: And she let you walk with the relic. She could’ve killed you two times. But she didn’t. Why? Because whether she likes it or not, you are her DAUGHTER! And she LOVES you! 

Yang: Um…

Me: I hope- I hope Raven puts her hands on you because you earned the most savage ass whipping alive.  You basic bitch.

Yang: *shocked*

Me: Anyways y'all had plenty of opportunities to make your characters good. You all were given a good amount of screen time, however, the writers don't allow you to face your problems, shield you from consequences, and try so hard to prove you are always in the right all the time that you all might as well be Mary Sue. The worst kind of Mary Sue. The do no wrong type of Mary Sue.

Jaune: Damn. 

Me: Jaune, bro, I hope you survive this cause I still stand by this the writers did you dirty man. You didn't deserve that man. You didn't- you didn't deserve that. You and your team deserve better. 

[lakesbian]

Hi, I just want to clarify that I don't mean this as an accusation but as an honest question; but when you and others on your posts are talking about narrative bigotry in Worm you talk about the racism and homophobia (which I agree with) but you also talk about fatphobia/fat characters being universally handled poorly, and I would love a breakdown as to why this is. With regards to Piggot when she was initially introduced I was thinking from how the heroes thought about her in their POV chapters that she was going to be the fatphobic stereotype of "soft and uncool but mean/unpleasant, disgusting fat civilian who doesn't know real courage and heroism like the thin, attractive heroes", and was pleasantly surprised when she got a lot more nuance than that, and also turned out to be very courageous and militaristic in contrast to the stereotype of "fat = cowardly and doesn't know real survival", with her flaws more lying in how she goes too far in that direction. In general the problem I typically see with how I see fat characters represented isn't just that they have flaws, but that they are never allowed to be "cool". They might be laughably dumb or they might be smart, but in a "loser nerd" way, never in a "clever scheming competent leader" kind of way. If they are negative/mean/evil characters, the emphasis is always on their venal, base qualities like gluttony, greed, and just being a jerk, they are never an "evil is cool" character with flaws like pride or a philosophy that is thoughtful and intended well but goes too far. So in that respect I thought Piggot was well-written, well besides. being literally named Piggot which is cringe but I could excuse as setting up the expectation of a stereotype to later support. And the only other character I remember being described as fat, Gregor the Snail, I have no memory of being any kind of problematic stereotype, though I don't remember him and his chapter that well either. So could you explain why Worm writes fat people badly/fatphobically?

this took way too long to answer because it's like. Well it's a simple answer but also this is a very long ask. so there's more to unpack. the short answer is just that literally, like, virtually 99.99% of the times a fat character or someone being fat is mentioned in literally any wildbow novel it's with palpable disgust. regardless of who the narrator is. it's obvious even with taylor but pact really hammers this home because blake is characterized in a way that indicates he should never be randomly judging someone's weight or appearance and he's still constantly written as observing whether or not someone is "fat." and it's in italics, like it's a slur or some grievous insult. like we're not even at the point of being able to analyze how wildbow writes specific fat characters here due to there are almost none of them and anytime fatness is mentioned it's in the context of it being stated in the same tone as if the narrator was observing someone picking their nose and eating it. like the loathing is Palpable. pay attention to how the phrases "fat" or "obese" or "morbidly obese" are used the next time you're reading a wildbow novel. you'll see what i mean.

as for the specific characters it's like. i think this post has everything icould think to say about gregor already in it, which as you will see is not very strongly opinionated. i mention piggot in it also. i don't remember enough abt either to just wax abt them at length but fundamentally it's that there's nothing particularly Strongly Good about either of them--not doing the "soft lazy uncool glutton" schtick is, like, bare minimum, and neither of them are very far above the bare minimum, and they're in a story that consistently does infinitely less than the bare minimum. there's gonna need to be more than a fat character Having Characterization before we can say that worm isn't wildly fatphobic