#that's not an insult to blake it just is what it is

[shakebelton]

let me be serious for a sec about adam and blake and their images and fame and online discussion that goes with it and why i even care...

the thing about adam levine is that it's damn impressive how resilient he is. i would just be fucking evil now if i were him, but he's chilling. in retrospect, knowing all the facts, 2018-2022 was just a really messy depressive spiral for him (i'd like to think i would've picked up on it if i were following his life in any way at that point but who knows really) and it's just insane how he got (and still gets) dragged to hell and back for every minor messy thing he did. i think the public should forgive him, but also like i think there's nothing to forgive. it's just clown level discourse, everything that's been happening around him these past few years especially.

i cannot even imagine that every single one of my, however slight, fuckups, is ridiculed by millions of people for months at a time. once, i cried at an airport at 5 am when i found out from a tweet a person hated me (it hurt more that they admitted it wasn't really for any discernible reason). if i had 10% of the things that happened to him happen to me i would've straight up killed myself or been full on evil by now. and like, i'm not really seeing the jerk people talk about. god knows i've dug around in his life for two years now and i'm not seeing a bad person. and granted, he's literally Just Some Guy with flaws to me, not an "adorable kitten who must be protected" as 2013 tumblr seemed to believe, but also i'm not seeing an asshole. and yeah maybe he's somehow shittier than i think, there's so much private stuff i might not know about, but what i know is, every public thing of his that i've seen criticised is just horribly misconstrued, like it's just plain wrong just about all the time. like i'll be looking at him talk about his workout and he comes across fine, funny and down to earth, and then i'll read the comments and it's people saying he's full of himself. i'll see him recoil in shock as a fan he didn't see approach runs into him on stage and all the people are saying he thinks he's better than everyone. it really makes you think... like whenever i see something about people saying he was a jerk when they met him, i really question the truth of that, because i've seen what they label 'jerk' behavior from him and they are straight up wrong, straight up.

and it's not like i even want to like him either. he's too rich, too talented and too good looking, and lives at a level of comfort i cannot even imagine if i try, and it pisses me off. but goddamn it if it isn't downright impressive/commendable how he can go on with his life with the amount of hate thrown around. he's stepping back, shutting up, minding his own business in the face of ill intentioned insanity, and it's almost incomprehensible to me.

it's somewhat similar when it comes to blake too, by the way. the shit that man's gone through and is still going through about everything related to his divorce with miranda and him getting together with gwen, i cannot even grasp it. and unlike adam's, blake's situation is even more crazy in some ways, because so much of stuff about him is just lies, like just completely made up by tabloids things, or full on delusions. and it's hard for me to imagine carrying on with my life, calm and silent, in that face of things like that potentially happening to me, and i applaud them for it.

so when it comes to me writing fanfic about them, i started out with mostly fun things, like pretty much on the crack side, just because their stuff on the voice is mostly banter and it's funny and you naturally try to replicate that dynamic in your writing. but lately i've been trying to explore angsty writing more, and the truth is that i can't even scratch the surface of it, of the level of low i perceive them to have experienced. some of it's really just drawn out hell, and i can't stay there long enough, story wise, to give it the justice it deserves. but i'm gonna keep at it, because the bad, upsetting things they've gone through just astonish me, and it's just endlessly fascinating to explore complex human emotion like that, and some of it even helps me work through my own trauma or figure things out in my own life. so at the end of the day, it's not all about them, it's about me, but sometimes i just can't stop thinking about their stories.

[limethefirst]

PART 2 OF VOID RUNNERS PLEASEE😭🙏

Void Runners Pt.2

pairings: Deadpool x Wolverine x teen!reader

warnings: contains heavy spoilers for Deadpool and Wolverine, swearing, crude humor, Deadpool

summary: After escaping Cassandra's lair you find yourself tagging along with Deadpool and Wolverine in hopes of saving their universe as well as getting out of the void

Part 1

a/n: Ask and you shall receive! This is a continuation of Void Runners since people seemed to really enjoy it! I hope it lives up to what you guys were expecting, I was thinking of ways to involve the reader a bit more! Request are open

You had no idea what was happening. One moment you were watching as Cassandra was about to let the giant monster known as Alioth eat you, the next you were being squished by Deadpool on some type of rocket soaring through the sky escaping the close clutches of death itself.

There wasn't much time to process anything because you were already about to crash, and were flung straight into the hard, dusty ground you've come to know as the Void.

A groan escaped you lips as you sat up, looking towards your new companion's, Deadpool and Wolverine; noticing how Deadpool was on top of him, your brows raised a bit.

"What cha' thinking 'bout?" Deadpool asked him, his voice laced with an innocent tone.

Logan wasn't fond of this at all, "Get the fuck off of me," he said, almost growling at the man.

"Shh shh, almost done"

"Almost done what?!" he look up at Deadpool, concerned about what he meant by that.

Deadpool now changed his tone to a more annoyed one, "Getting my knife out of your buttock, you pervert! Get your bind out of my pants!" Both men were now getting up, "I'm telling Blake!"

Deadpool looked over to you and grabbed your arm pulling you up next to him. Then he gave you a silly thumbs up, which you didn't understand why but just gave him a smile in return as a thank you for the gesture.

"New rule!" Logan began again, "I talk now" this time he looked at you as well.

"I haven't even said anything?!" You looked at him confused. Throwing your arms up a bit, and looking at Deadpool as well.

"Hush little one, Papa is talking right now" Deadpool looked over to you, holding up one finger to signal you to be quiet as he talked to Logan. You threw your arms up again now looking at Logan as he groaned at whatever was going on, obviously exhausted.

"Shut the fuck up!" Logan had now turned around, "Let me fucking think, we gotta get back to paradox right? Right?"

"Am I allowed to speak now?" Deadpool asked him sarcastically, you could tell he was smiling.

"Just nod asshole" Logan was fed up at this point.

Deadpool gave in and gave Logan a slight up and down, letting his buddy say what he needed to. Logan then looked at you as if something in his brain clicked.

"Johnny said something about others before you got him killed!"

"Poor kid? He was like fifty!" Deadpool shoots back, insulted by the comment.

Logan looked back at you, "You've been here longer then any of us have, do you know where we can find these guys?"

You hesitated before speaking to him, "I have an idea," you said, Logan looked back at Deadpool and nodded.

"You're gonna help us find them and get us out of here," Logan told you. He wasn't willing to listen to any protest, but you didn't care to argue, this was your chance at escape and by God you were gonna take it.

"Alright, I'll do my best then." You nodded at him, jumping on the bandwagon of opportunity.

"Oh I knew it was a good idea to bring you along sugar sprinkles!" Deadpool said as he patted your back, which honestly felt more like a hard slap, that lightly pushed you forward.

"You better fix my shit like you fucking promised," Logan pointed his finger at Deadpool's chest as you stepped to the side, look straight ahead noticing something in the distance.

"I smell a quest!"

"I smell food,"

This caused both men to look at what you were looking at.

A little restaurant not to far from here.

Logan was turning the place upside, you were unsure what he was looking for as he'd already found you guys some unopened spam to eat.

Deadpool finally had his mask off and you noticed what he looked like without it, you couldn't help but feel bad for him, even with the way he is, something tragic must have happened for his face to be all scarred the way it was.

"So what made you finally wear an honest to God costume?" He asked in between bites, "Mines red so they can't see me bleed." This time he turned to you and gave you a strange smile as he took yet another bite. "I can see how yellow can be useful too!"

Logan turned around and stared him down, "Have you been checked for ADHD?"

"Nu uh," Deadpool answered, mouth full with a big smile.

"You should," This time you answered as you finally tried the spam, it wasn't too bad for God knows how old it could've been.

You could hear a chuckle come from Logan as he continued his search.

"Though I've had several STD's, probably caused by ADHD" Deadpool told you guys.

You just rolled your eyes at him, wondering where he gets these ideas from. You guys both sat there longer watching Logan. Deadpool sat on one side of the booth, you sat on the edge of the table a bit, and Logan was still searching.

"What are you even looking for?" You asked the bigger man, curious what was making him more frustrated then the red masked fellow next to you.

All you heard was a mumble before you saw him grab a bottle of rubbing alcohol.

"No no no no no, that's rubbing alcohol, you don't want to-" Before he could even finish his sentence Logan had already chugged most of it down, you turned a bit to him and sat yourself next to Deadpool watching Logan come towards the table, "Oh yup there you go, there you go, fuck that liver."

"Don't come to me when you need a liver transplant," Deadpool gave an amused snuff at your comment and turned back to the big fellow.

"What the fuck are those?" Logan was looking at, staples in Deadpool's head? You turned to look at it and you stared a little too hard that you could see the little strands of most likely fake hair pinched in between it.

"Oh, back in civilian life I wore a toupee, but nobody knows," Deadpool gave a little smile as he looked at you guys, touching his phantom hair.

Both you and Logan began to laugh a little at this, "They fucking know" you told him.

Logan joined in on the teasing, "Everybody knows," Logan gave you a smile, being glad someone else is there to help him tease the annoying red suited vigilante.

"Wanna talk about what's haunting you, or are we gonna wait for a third act flashback?"

"Ughh go fuck yourself," this was all it took for Logan to go back to the bar stools as he sat there, drinking his rubbing alcohol.

You gave Deadpool and annoyed look at elbowed him a bit, trying to get him to lay off the man a bit; it seemed to get through to him, as he rolled his eyes and began to talk again, "In my world, you're uh, well regarded."

"Not in mine," Logan didn't look back, he just took another sip.

"Well they don't like me much in my world," Deadpool said trying to lighten the mood.

"We couldn't tell.." You told him, as you stood up and threw away your empty spam cup.

"I wanted to be something, you know? Shit, I wanted to be an Avenger!"

"Fuck the Avengers,"

"I didn't make the cut though, same with the X-men," Deadpool paused, picking his next words wisely. "My girlfriend left me,"

"You had a girlfriend?" Logan asked, with genuine curiosity.

"Yea, Vanessa, when we met she was a dancer, made a whole life, it was good, but oh boy I just, uh"

You stood by the trash, leaning against the wall, not wanting to intrude on their moment.

"But fuck, you were an X-men, fuck that you were the X-man. You, uh the Wolverine, you were a hero in my world."

"Yea well, he ain't shit in mine." Logan finished his drink, if that's what you could even call it.

Deadpool turned to you, as if asking you to say something too. You let out a bit of a sigh before speaking.

"You saved me in my world."

Logan turned his head a little bit, and Deadpool gave you a somber look, unlike his normal self.

"I was in an accident, but I saw this man with metal claws, he helped me, he got me out." You closed your eyes and breathed.

"It inspired me to become who I am today, every Wolverine, is a hero in every universe, no matter what." You looked up at the both of them, "Well it's what I think at least. I didn't recognize you at first, but when I heard your name, I knew who you were, even if you aren't from my universe."

Logan looked back down at his empty hands, he began to think. The silence was killing you. Deadpool could tell and so he went back to his normal demeanor. "Alright sugar tits," Deadpool looks at Logan, "Time to go!"

It was time to continue your adventure in finding the people who would help you escape this place.

[lovingdabeessss]

One of my favorite things about Rwby

Is this dynamic

Ruby Weiss and Blake all have world altering importance

And yangs just like a very determined older sister

Yang just wants her family all safe and happy and would happily die to ensure this

Yangs just like “this is my found family” and it’s like the most important people in the world

Not that this is at all new she’s just like surrounded by them her uncle is one of the best huntsmen alive despite being falling over drunk all the time considering he does all of ozpins missions personally and always by himself Ravens so good of a criminal she was on salems radar plus she’s MAGIC and can turn into a damn bird AND so yangs gif that in her I guess + the whole maiden thing summers super important somehow connected to salem as well ironwood who was the general for a WHILE was so close to qrow he might be her or rubys god father ozpin liked strq so much he gave two members magic so he might be a godfather too cause he seems to be really close to the family too

She’s like a magnet

And Yangs still just kinda there and she doesn’t consider any of these people like high and mighty or anything for being so important

She talks to ironwood super casually for the highest ranking military commander ever when he visits her after she becomes a criminal in v3 Qrows just her uncle when she speaks to Raven she’s totally ok with the idea of beating up her entire clan of criminals to get what she wants and then doesn’t respect a THING she says even after the reveal that MAGIC IS REAL and then when they Talk again after Raven joins salem, the bad guy and reveals she’s the MAIDEN which is super powerful yang insults her over and over with only one of her arms like she’s in no danger and then when she confronted ozpin/ Oscar about what Raven told her she gives him no special treatment for being a magical wizard that her entire family (minus Raven) trusts to make any decisions

Yang makes no exceptions no one is special yang would look the gods in the eyes and go “fuck off” and see nothing wrong with that

[rachetmath]

RWBY x Video games pt 2

Ruby: Okay so this time we were paired or geouped for some games. Me and my team were in Borderlands.

Jaune: Really? Which one?

Yang: All of them.

Jaune: *laughs* Okay. Okay. So who was right, the hunter or the deemed villains?

Ruby: Simple it was-

Weiss: Villains.

Blake: What?!

Yang: Babe we have to admit in a world like Pandora it might as well be the insane, and probably the most irredeemable place to live in.

Ruby: Doesn't matter. Jax is more evil than all those psychos. He knew what he was doing.

Weiss: Yeah but he was trying to get rid of psychos and provide people who are less crazy a safe place to live. Even though it's madness considering he’ll tax people.

Blake: What about the twins?

Yang: I mean shoot they were more of an after-product. They might as well represent that being a hunter ain't all what it is cracked up to be. Cause there will always be somebody bigger and badder who will one-up you in every way. Not just that they probably have brought more order to Pandora than we ever did.

Ruby: But-

Jaune: Okay! Forget I asked before you tear each other apart.

Ruby: Fine. Anyways what games were you guys in?

Nora and Ren: It Takes Two.

Yang: Oh. I mean it's easy considering-

Nora: No, we had issues.

Ren: A lot of them.

Nora: But the levels were beautiful. And Jaune.

Jaune: ?

Nora: If you ever want to talk I’m here.

Jaune: Hm.

Ruby: Wow you and Jaune have… tension.

Nora: I know.

Yang: Anyways, what about you, Jaune?

Jaune: O well I was by myself-

Emerald: Oh hell no. You lying ass bitch.

Weiss: Woah, hold on, Emerald why are you mad?

Emerald: I was with his pussy ass in the game. It took hours to get out.

Jaune: Cause you couldn't let me do my objectives.

Emerald: And make the game easier to where the Grimm will suspect us? No.

An incoming message saying, “The objective is to clear the game. The NPCs would have made his job hard enough considering there is no save button. You just made it more difficult for him by getting in his way. You could have stood still.”

Jaune: See.

Emerald: Well I gave you a fair shot.

Jaune: Please, it took you killing me I don't know how many times for me to even want to settle the score. By the way, I didn't appreciate the dry humping.

Emerald: Fuck you.

Jaune: Fuck you too. Don't be mad because I managed to outplay you. You are just trash.

Emerald: Okay. See-see we can fight. We can settle this now.

Jaune: Girl I will have you on your knees, begging. In fact I will have you scream my name and call me ‘Daddy’ like you ain't my daughter.

Nora: Are you two trying to insult each other or-

Emerald: Yes!

Jaune: Probably both.

Ruby: I feel disturbed to ask but what game was-?

Jaune and Emerald: Death Loop.

RWBY: Ew.

Nora: Gross.

Ren: I mean-no, I- I second that. Ew.

Emerald: *blushes* Shut up!

Ruby: Anyways where’s Oscar?

Oscar: Here.

Ruby: What game were you in?

Oscar: I wasn't in a game.

Jaune: What?!

Emerald: Don't tell me you have been sitting here the whole time.

Oscar: Yep.

Jaune: Oscar we are going through hell trying to stay alive. You didn't think to go and try to find us a way out?

Oscar: Sorry.

Jaune: Damn it!

Emerald: Stupid ass- Hazel made a damn mistake sparring you!

Jaune: Hey now don't get out of line.

Emerald: Or what?!

Jaune: I-

A door appears.

The message said, “If you two need to blow off steam then take a break here.”

Yang: Seriously? Like they are that tense to-

The door closes immediately with Jaune and Emerald gone.

Blake: *jaws dropped*

Weiss: They-they… impossible…

Ruby: Weiss claim down I sure-

Emerald: Ah~ Yes~ Harder. HARDER!!!

Ruby: Oh I hate being wrong.

Weiss: Fuck.

[howlingday]

Jaune Arc Is A Creep

Cardin: Ha! You stupid nerd! (Shoves Jaune) Reading books and shit!

Jaune: Laugh while you still can! You're the stronger one now, but some day, I'm going to grow up, and I'm going to teach myself how to make chloroform and knock you all out! Then I'll drag you into my basement and chain you to the walls! The first thing you'll see when you wake up is me, standing over you as your new god!

Jaune: AND THEN I'LL MAKE YOU WORSHIP ME IN WAYS NO GOD HAS BEFORE.

Cardin: ...

Ruby: (Bandaging him) And then what happened?

Jaune: (Sniffles) They beat me up and took my books~!

----------------------------------

Ruby: Fuck you guys! I'm going back out there and kicking their asses!

Jaune: No, Ruby! Vengeance protocol dictates that we should lay low after an attack and conserve our resources!

Ruby: Fuck the rules! They insulted us!

Jaune: Ruby, as a guy who gets his ass kicked so much he could be a professional, listen to me. The only thing we can do for now is survive!

Ruby: Oh, so I should just cower like you, should I? LIKE A LITTLE BITCH?!

Yang: (Pops Ruby in the head) As far as I can see, you're the only one acting like a little bitch here, Ruby. Now listen to what Jaune has to say.

Jaune: Thanks for sticking up for me, Yang!

Yang: Shut the hell up, Jaune! And you, Ruby Rose, open your mouth.

Ruby: Wha- (Bread shoved in, Gagging)

Jaune: Oh! Oh... Oh, wow... That's... That's kinda hot, Yang.

Yang: Eat, Ruby. Eat and build your strength.

Ruby: (Crying)

Jaune: Keep crying, Ruby. It'll make the bread taste like tears.

----------------------------------

Pyrrha: Jaune, I know this is tough, but... Is there a higher power you worship?

Jaune: I used to worship Monty Oum.

Pyrrha: Who's Monty Oum?

Jaune: THE GOD OF DEATH.

----------------------------------

Goodwitch: You there! Who the fuck are you?!

Jaune: Jaune Arc, sir!

Goodwitch: Why the fuck are you here, trainee?

Jaune: To become a huntsman, sir!

Goodwitch: That's bullshit! Look at you! I bet you play with dolls!

Jaune: Well, yes, but only for roleplay revenge fantasies, sir!

Goodwitch: Shut up, Banana-Slut!

----------------------------------

Blake: You can do it, Weiss. Just focus on your core when using the tether.

Jaune: Yeah, it's not too hard if you concentrate.

Weiss: Even you can do this, Arc? I know I'll regret asking this, but what's your secret?

Jaune: I, uh.... I kinda have a natural advantage with this skill.

Weiss: What do you mean?

Jaune: I, uh... I used to experiment a lot with auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Weiss: ...Just take me up the tether.

----------------------------------

Jaune: Oh! I also like to read!

Blake: Oh, really?

Jaune: Yup! For example, did you know that if you electrocute someone underwater, it'll leave no burn marks?

Blake: ...

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Jaune: So... I gave it a lot of thought, and I decided. I'm going to serve on the front lines.

Nora: What?! Why?! Jaune, seriously, you suck at everything you do!

Jaune: I know.

Nora: With your tactical brilliance, you could easily land a spot as an officer away from the battlefield!

Jaune: I know.

Nora: So why the hell are you coming to the front lines with us?!

Jaune: ...

Jaune: I WANT TO SEE DEATH.

----------------------------------

Ren: We're finally here, Jaune. We finally made it as huntsmen. Do you have any regrets?

Jaune: No. It was either this or med school.

Ren: I... wasn't aware you wanted to be a doctor. What was going to be your specialty?

Jaune: (Wide grin) EUTHANASIA.

----------------------------------

Coco: I'm open to suggestions.

Nora: Let's give all of our weapons to Ruby and have her use them to build a giant rifle-toting, sword-swinging mecha.

Coco: What is this, a fucking anime? No!

Blake: We could always give up and run away.

Coco: No!

Ruby: Let's play Arrowfell!

Coco: NO, GOD DAMMIT! NO! Does anyone have any good ideas?!

Ren: Jaune has one.

Coco: ...Dear god. Alright. How bad is it?

Jaune: This is an old revenge fantasy I used to reenact with dolls.

Yatsuhashi: Holy shit, this guy is fucked.

Jaune: In my most elaborate schemes, I'd pretend the dolls could see me before stabbing their eyes out and burning them alive.

Fox: ...Jaune, has anyone ever told you that you have an unhealthy obsession with ocular trauma?

Jaune: It's like closing the windows to the souls!

Cardin: You know, if we shoot out the Grimm eyes, we could finish them off without losing anyone.

Pyrrha: Jaune, you are the creepiest fucking guy I've ever met, but hey, that's not a bad plan.

----------------------------------

Nora: Jaune, can I ask you something?

Jaune: Sure!

Nora: This is going to sound stupid, but... Let's say I, hypothetically, have romantic feelings for a fake brother-

Jaune: You mean Ren?

Nora: Yeah, whatever. But let's say I acted on those feelings. Would it... Would it be wrong?

Jaune: Nora, why are you asking me about socially moral protocol?

Nora: Because you're the only one I can trust to not tell anyone. And even if you did, everyone would just assume you're being a creep again and I could deny everything.

Jaune: Wow, Nora. That's cold, dark, and manipulative genius.

Nora: I'm sorry, I just really need to know.

Jaune: I've never seen you in this light before.

Nora: Is it wrong?

Jaune: Hey, can I have a lock of your hair?

Nora: Answer my question, Jaune!

Jaune: Alright, alright! Look, the way I see it, I don't see anything wrong with your feelings, Nora. He wasn't really your family anyways, so even if you did incest-bang, it would've been fine.

Nora: It's not incest!

Jaune: I know, I know! I just prefer to think of it that way!

Nora: ...

Jaune: Bitch, don't even give me that look. You already KNEW what you were getting into asking me for advice!

----------------------------------

Marrow: General, wait!

Ironwood: God dammit, Wags, not now!

Marrow: General, Huntsman Ren and Pine along with Huntress Valkyrie are invaluable soldiers, and thus are completely expendable. But you should know that Huntsman Arc is said to be one of the most fucked up people on Remnant!

Jaune: (Thinking) No! They found my secret!.

Ironwood: Oh, really?

Jaune: Act normal- (Meow) NO, MISTER WHISKERS! NOT NOW!.

Ironwood: And just how fucked up are we talking?

Jaune: (Twitching hard) GET YOUR LITTLE CLAWS OUT OF MY EYES~!.

Marrow: Fucked up enough, some say, to rival even you, General.

Ironwood: ...To rival me, you say?

Ironwood: JAUNE ARC!

Jaune: MEOW!

Ironwood: Is what they say true?! Are you truly a fucked up little shit?!

Jaune: Well, I think I'm perfectly normal, but I may have a few desires and tendencies some may classify as... off?

Ironwood: ...Okay, Huntsman Arc. We're going to play a little game, and if you lose, the survival of both yourself and your friends over there, too!

Jaune: Sir, this is a horrendous abuse of authority-!

Ironwood: SILENCE!

Ironwood: Jaune Arc, I challenge you to a personal duel to the death! We shall fight with words to determine once and for all who is the most fucked up human being on the planet!

Jaune: (Huffs) Okay, this? I can do!

Jaune: I PLAY WITH HUMAN DOLLS!

Ironwood: I PLAY WITH HUMAN LIVES!

Jaune: I laugh at death!

Ironwood: I worship Salem on the weekends!

Jaune: SALEM! WORSHIPS! ME!

Ironwood: I lick tears off of orphans!

Jaune: I call arson a career!

Ironwood: I joined the military to watch people die!

Jaune: I celebrate living failure!

Ironwood: I submit to certain death!

Jaune: I harass the elderly!

Ironwood: I dip my soldiers with disease!

Jaune: I throw rocks at the homeless!

Ironwood: Oh yeah? Well, you wouldn't know anything about this because you're a virgin, but casualties are my favorite form of sexual foreplay! (Jaune stunned) YES! HAHAHA! Foolish child! You thought you could match wits with the worst of us and win?! You played the cards of a petulant boy, Jaune Arc, and now you and your little bitch friends will die!

Jaune: (Looks to his team)

Nora: (Thinking) You can do it, Jaune!.

Ren: (Thinking) There's no one I've ever met who's creeper than you!.

Jaune: You thought you were fighting a mere moral? You thought you could probe the darkness that is my mind?!.

Jaune: FOOL! I SHALL DROWN IN THE MAELSTROM OF MY NIGHTMARES! MY TENTACLES SHALL TWIST AND CONTORT YOUR THROAT AS I THROTTLE YOU WITH VISIONS OF HERMAPHRODITIC SUCCUBI AND VIOLENT! OEDIPEDAL! RAPE FANTASIES!

Jaune: I will take your cities! I will subjugate your children! I will rape and devour your armies! But you, only you shall survive, so that you may bear testament to my will and ultimate revengeance!

Atlas: ...

Vale: ...

Vacuo: ...

Mistral: ...

Salem: ...

[skidsspace]

The Tai discourse is back. And honestly? I agree with points from both sides. Tai loves his kids. Tai also neglected his kids. These are points that can't be denied by either side. I would say...Tai is not a bad dad. But Tai is not a great dad. We've seen both in this series and Tai falls somewhere in between. When Yang says "He just kind of shut down" people like to say she said kind of not fully. But...well of course she did. These girls never outright insult their father and she was only trying to connect to Blake. The picture we see on screen is Tai sitting in his room staring at a picture. It also can't be ignored that Yang managed to get a sleeping toddler into a wagon and out the house and somewhere in the woods before anyone was able to find them. I'm sorry but that takes time. Yang is only two years older than ruby. A 5 year old is gonna have trouble lifting a 3 year old. And Yang felt the need to bring ruby anyway. So Tai either wasn't home or...wasn't paying attention. Neither great. And it was Qrow that found them. But it can't be ignored that the Boba thing means Tai was present again.

I think what it is, truly is with Tai, is that he doesn't know how to deal with the big hard emotions. Like when he calls yangs depression moping or he shuts down himself. He himself couldn't handle his own depression let alone his daughters. He doesn't know how to have those talks or how to give a hand up, After all Summer is the one who came and gave him a hand after Raven left. So he makes jokes and tries to push them onward. And Yang adopted making jokes for hard situations from him. Ren calls her on it. She learned it from Tai. She picked up on him doing it to handle hard moments.

It's not the greatest thing. It's not. But from what I've seen Tai is not the worst dad and also isn't the best. I don't know if we can say he tried his best but I think we can say he did try. Tai loves his kids. But he doesn't know how to handle big, hard emotional moments.

[kitkatopinions]

I love when anti-rwde posters unintentionally say things that seem rwde lol. Here are my favorites so far:

The always good "Ironwood was always clearly an evil dictator" If this were true it would make the show worse than I already think it is, because not only did Team RWBY willingly work with him without any sort of recognition that it might be bad of them, but the writers have also talked about Ironwood's good intentions and the fall to villainy and how they wanted V7 to have no clear bad guy.

Whenever someone dismisses any early season as unimportant or something that no longer matters. Like, my guy, they're all supposed to matter and make up a good story together.

The people that say that the Blake and Yang ship is the exact same as Blake x Sun as a reason for why people who ship Blake with Sun but not Yang are wrong. Idk if they realize characters and dynamics are meant to be different and interesting.

The people who find redesigns of Yang where she's wearing clothing that's either the exact same level of 'modest' as the show or actually less sexualized and yell about how re-writers always overly sexualize Yang.

The people that defend every Jaune scene by saying he's just as much of a main character as Ruby. Like yes thank you for proving our point lol.

The people that constantly say important things just happen off screen. Things like main characters being friends, communicating important plot details to each other, showing grief at terrible deaths, unlearning racism... The more stuff people say happened off screen the more unintentionally insulting I think they're being because instead of saying "It was a mistake, they didn't have time, or they forgot" it's "they willfully didn't include it because they couldn't be bothered."

The people that say it's a good thing the entirety of Atlas was destroyed. Like personally I think the show could've done better at making Atlas and Mantle more varied but actually DID make it clear there were working class people and Faunus and good people just trying to make it that lived in Atlas and didn't deserve to lose everything. But apparently these people believe everyone in Atlas was some rich selfish asshole who deserved it and that would be very flimsy and bad writing.

The people who say that "drinking the tea" and "going to the tree" in V9 is actually just a metaphor for therapy. Like I know that Ruby essentially tried to commit suicide in V9. But I guess what they think what happened is that Neo was beating up Ruby while trying to make her get therapy, and everyone being a moment too late was them not arriving in time to stop Ruby from going to therapy, and when she fell down into the darkness that was symbolic of driving to her therapist's office, and when Yang was worried that Ruby wouldn't be herself anymore she actively was unhappy that Ruby was at therapy. Like how much worse written would V9 be if I actually believed what they did? XD

The people that insist that everything in RWBY was part of some super well thought out 'planned from the beginning' thing. Not only is that actually not a flex with a show that feels more disjointed, rushed, and ill-thought through with every season, but it's actively not what the writers say half the time when they do things like talk about how they 'wrote themselves into corners' and admit that at the beginning they were 'throwing things out and having to stick with it,' and having Blake's VA describe Blake as straight in official stuff and how they entirely reinvented Robin. Like either you think everything was not planned from the beginning or you think the writers are liars lol.

The people that actively just pretend or actually believe that the show is different than what it is, like the person who said RWBY was 'written by and for queer people' or the person who said Blake and Yang had been openly dating since V2 or the person who said Ruby was shown grieving Pyrrha way more than Jaune or the person who said that the RWBY villains were straight white men who weren't part of oppressed groups. What better way to prove that you actually don't like the show you're watching than to insist that it's a completely different show?

I'm sure there's more but those are the ones on my mind right now. XD Once again, I am certain that I have more love for RWBY than a lot of anti-rwde posters do.

[octopiys]

I'm back with more incorrect quotes pt. I've lost count

Anyone on the team: captain, I screwed up, big time.

Price, with his head in his hands: boys, given your daily life experiences, you’re gonna have to be more specific.

-

Ghost: *casually taking four stairs at a time*

Soap, falling behind, taking two stairs at a time: Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fu-

-

Soap: Next time I'm at the pet store, I'm gonna take a hamster and drop it in the scorpion cage. I wanna see what a hamster's face looks like when it goes, "oh, fuck."

-

König: That was so hot, Horangi.

Horangi: I literally called the person who just flirted with you a degenterate dog and told them I hope they get dragged through the streets.

König: I'm so in love with you.

-

Roach, planning an undercover op: You cannot be Blake Bortles.

König: Fine! Then I’ll be Jake-

Gaz, under his breath: Don’t say Jortles.

König: Jortles! And I work at the molotov cocktail department.

-

Roach: The moon looks beautiful, doesn’t it?

Soap, looking at Roach: Yeah… but do you know what’s more beautiful?

Roach and Soap in unison: *sighs* Ghost

-

Graves, grinning: Before you were what?

Rodolfo: Before I was-

Graves: What?

Rodolfo: Before I was inter-

Graves: Before you were interrupted?

Rodolfo: Cut me off one more time and I swear I'll-

Graves: What?

Rodolfo: *goes completely silent*

Alejandro, nervously: Stop that. Before he hurts you.

-

Shepherd: But who gets which pencil?

Price: Since they're my things, I get the good one, Nikolai gets the broken one and you don't get one because fuck you.

-

Price: Do you guys ever have a civilized conversation that doesn't require insulting each other every time you get a chance?

Alejandro: No.

Graves: No.

Price: Didn't think so.

-

Ghost: *tapping fingers on table*

Soap: *taps fingers back furiously*

Gaz: …What’s going on?

Price: Morse code. They’re talking.

Ghost: -.-- ..- .-. / - …. . / -.-. ..- - . … -

Soap: *slams hands on table* YOU TAKE THAT BACK!

[lakesbian]

Hi, I just want to clarify that I don't mean this as an accusation but as an honest question; but when you and others on your posts are talking about narrative bigotry in Worm you talk about the racism and homophobia (which I agree with) but you also talk about fatphobia/fat characters being universally handled poorly, and I would love a breakdown as to why this is. With regards to Piggot when she was initially introduced I was thinking from how the heroes thought about her in their POV chapters that she was going to be the fatphobic stereotype of "soft and uncool but mean/unpleasant, disgusting fat civilian who doesn't know real courage and heroism like the thin, attractive heroes", and was pleasantly surprised when she got a lot more nuance than that, and also turned out to be very courageous and militaristic in contrast to the stereotype of "fat = cowardly and doesn't know real survival", with her flaws more lying in how she goes too far in that direction. In general the problem I typically see with how I see fat characters represented isn't just that they have flaws, but that they are never allowed to be "cool". They might be laughably dumb or they might be smart, but in a "loser nerd" way, never in a "clever scheming competent leader" kind of way. If they are negative/mean/evil characters, the emphasis is always on their venal, base qualities like gluttony, greed, and just being a jerk, they are never an "evil is cool" character with flaws like pride or a philosophy that is thoughtful and intended well but goes too far. So in that respect I thought Piggot was well-written, well besides. being literally named Piggot which is cringe but I could excuse as setting up the expectation of a stereotype to later support. And the only other character I remember being described as fat, Gregor the Snail, I have no memory of being any kind of problematic stereotype, though I don't remember him and his chapter that well either. So could you explain why Worm writes fat people badly/fatphobically?

this took way too long to answer because it's like. Well it's a simple answer but also this is a very long ask. so there's more to unpack. the short answer is just that literally, like, virtually 99.99% of the times a fat character or someone being fat is mentioned in literally any wildbow novel it's with palpable disgust. regardless of who the narrator is. it's obvious even with taylor but pact really hammers this home because blake is characterized in a way that indicates he should never be randomly judging someone's weight or appearance and he's still constantly written as observing whether or not someone is "fat." and it's in italics, like it's a slur or some grievous insult. like we're not even at the point of being able to analyze how wildbow writes specific fat characters here due to there are almost none of them and anytime fatness is mentioned it's in the context of it being stated in the same tone as if the narrator was observing someone picking their nose and eating it. like the loathing is Palpable. pay attention to how the phrases "fat" or "obese" or "morbidly obese" are used the next time you're reading a wildbow novel. you'll see what i mean.

as for the specific characters it's like. i think this post has everything icould think to say about gregor already in it, which as you will see is not very strongly opinionated. i mention piggot in it also. i don't remember enough abt either to just wax abt them at length but fundamentally it's that there's nothing particularly Strongly Good about either of them--not doing the "soft lazy uncool glutton" schtick is, like, bare minimum, and neither of them are very far above the bare minimum, and they're in a story that consistently does infinitely less than the bare minimum. there's gonna need to be more than a fat character Having Characterization before we can say that worm isn't wildly fatphobic

[bluesest]

A House

Even in a place where you can do your private activities in peace it is not safe if the people who live there are enemies among them. In one home lived a "happy" family made up of the mother, father and… 4 brothers, exactly, a total nightmare especially if you are the youngest of them all:

Thomas: The oldest brother, he wears a red t-shirt with tight shorts almost all the time, he has a relaxed attitude with his family and nervous with other people, his hair is brown and he has a bit of a chin, he is the tallest among the 4.

Blake: The second brother, he is the toughest of them all, he always wanders around the house shirtless showing off his strong pectorals worthy of a gymbro, his sweaty smell floods the house and he is the least shy of them all when it comes to "basic needs".

Tony: The third brother, the most behaved of them all, always obedient to what his parents or Thomas tell him, he gets along somewhat badly with Blake thanks to their clashing personalities, however, they get to enjoy each other's company in different activities.

Alain: The fourth brother and the youngest, his personality is a combination of Blake's rebelliousness and cunning with Tony's shyness, he does not like to obey his other brothers despite being older and the orders of his parents: "Thomas is in charge", it is not that he does not like to listen, but he hates his brothers, they are cruel to him because he is the youngest of all, the most defenseless.

Life at home was hell for Alain, he heard several insults from his siblings, teasing and pranks, many times locking him in a basement just for fun, but his favorite activity is to take Alain's lunch, usually his mother would make desserts for the siblings and when she wasn't looking, they would take Alain's part and eat it threatening him that he was a little girl who can't take any jokes, this stopped Alain from expressing this situation to his parents because according to him: "I am not a whiny little girl".

One day like any other, Alain suffered from another cruel joke that included water balloons, his siblings mocked him again while with fury Alain went up to the second floor of the house where the bathroom was located, closed the door and began to dry his face with a white towel.

"Why won't they leave me alone?"

"I wish I could get revenge."

Suddenly his father Todd who was a man in his 40's, wearing glasses, dressed in a white t-shirt and was standing with a towel covering his hips as he enters the bathroom:

Todd: "Whoops, I didn't know it was occupied."

Alain: "I'm just drying my face dad, besides, don't you have your own bathroom?"

Todd: "I just came to take one thing out of here, you go on…wait why are you wet?"

Alain didn't want to answer that question, luckily a strange sound interrupted them both: *PPPFFT*. A wet fart appeared in the bathroom:

Alain: "Oh come on dad!"

Todd: "Oopsssss it slipped out son, sorry hahahahaha…"

Alain: "The smell isn't even normal!"

Todd: "Sorry, but recently I've been having problems with my own plumbing, I couldn't get all the crap out of me, I was constipated so I bought a laxative and it's taking effect. I only came here because when I finished my business, well, let's just say I didn't quite calculate how much toilet paper I would need, so I came here to borrow some." Alain: "I mean, your ass wrapped in a towel isn't… clean?"

Todd: "Yeah, but it's going to get even dirtier in a few minutes anyway, that fart was just a warning."

Alain: "DAAAAAAAAD!"

Todd: "Alright, I'll leave you alone."

Todd walked out of the bathroom closing the door leaving Alain in privacy again, "That really was embarrassing…wait a minute…that's it!" a bright idea crossed Alain's mind, "How about now they are the ones who will have an embarrassing moment…when they have diarrhea outside the house!"

Discreetly Todd walked into his parents' room and noticed two things: the horrible smell and the miralax laxative on the nightstand, he quietly picked it up and took it from there ready to begin his plan: "Intoxicate my siblings will be easy, they take all my food, I just have to find a way to make them Leave the house… right! They each have things to do out of here just for this day, so I have to take advantage of the situation!"

Alain arrived in the kitchen where with his skills he cooked one of the few desserts he knew how to make thanks to his mother: Brownies. After an hour and a half, they were finally ready, they looked great and smelled good, they were definitely not going to resist.

He walked around the house with the plate full of 9 brownies, when he got to the second floor he is seen by Tony while he was in his room, he approached him and said:

Tony: "Where did you get those, little guy?"

Alain: "Mom baked them for me and my friends coming over later."

Tony: "Isn't mommy supposed to have gone shopping?"

Alain: "Yes…b-but she left them baking and ordered me to take them out."

Blake appears on the scene:

Blake: "Do I smell chocolate? Give me some, little guy"

Alain: "They're for my friends!"

Blake: "I wasn't asking you!"

Both brothers began to struggle, Tony catching the falling brownies while Blake tried to pry the desserts out of Alain's hands, while Alain pretended that he really didn't want them taken away. With one more stretch of strength, Blake emerged with the victory by retrieving a plate of 6 brownies while Tony held 3 with his hands.

Alain: "Give them back to me."

Blake: "Or what, you're going to cry?"

Thomas appears annoyed in the hallway:

Thomas: "Stop yelling! You won't let me study in peace you assholes!"

Tony: "Excuse Alain, he's crying because Blake is bothering him."

Alain: "I'm not crying!"

Thomas: "Oh, and those goodies you got Blake?"

Blake: "Mom made them for the little girl, she wouldn't give them to me so I'm going to keep them to teach her a lesson about sharing."

Thomas: "Obviously that lesson involves me, give me some bro". Being 9, Blake hands out 3 to each brother, he starts eating and the taste is exceptional, albeit a little strange to the taste of mom's brownies, but they are still brownies, who cares if they have laxative in the recipe, right? He was followed by Thomas and Tony who more slowly enjoyed every bite of the dessert until in the blink of an eye they had finished it all.

Tony: "You really showed off with this treat bro."

Blake: "You know how I am, always so charitable to the poor needy souls."

Tony: "That's weird, the only one who looks like a shirtless bum here is you."

Blake: "Oops how dapper sir ("I need to scent the bathroom after I leave")"

Thomas: "Stop arguing, and let's thank the little girl scout for those delicious Brownies."

The three brothers in tandem thanked, "Thank you so much Alain!", Alain on the outside was frustrated and in real anger due to the insults and sarcasm, but inside his mind he thought, "Thank you to you"

Each brother after an hour left the home to go about their own business:

Thomas:

He arrived at the university in a bus, he had to take an important exam which he had been preparing for all week, it was difficult but not enough to overshadow his relaxed attitude. He set foot on campus and the first gurgles began:

He put a hand to his stomach, "It's just gas," paused for a moment, bent his knees a little thanks to the pain and:

*PPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTT*

"Wow", a long fart filled the fresh air, luckily there was no one around and besides it was still outside the premises, the smell was free in nature while Thomas without taking importance to this first warning headed to his classroom.

"Lucky it's only one hour of exam and I'll be back home, I hate going to this place on Saturdays"

*GGGGRGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR*

The teacher arrived, a man in his 60's, skinny and with white hair, he was wearing a formal uniform and square glasses, with a serious look he gave the start of the exam.

"This is the A, This is The C, and this…this one will be random."

*GRRRRRRRRRRRR*

"Oghhh, again I have to…can I hold on!" *GRRRRRRRRRGRGGRGGGG* *GRRRRRRRRR*

"Nope, I can't, I'm just going to release some pressure by stretching and… *GRRRRRRRR* oh no…"

*pffffffftttt*

A silent fart came out of Thomas' sweaty ass, "I wish no one had heard it… or smelled it *GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR* oh… what's happening to me?"

*GGGGRGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR* *ppppffffffttttttttTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT.*

The final crash of the buttocks caused by the pressurized air echoed and it was obvious that some people noticed the noise and the rotten smell, "Will it be last night's lasagna… or… those brownies?"

*GGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR*

"Whatever it is it's wreaking havoc in my gut *pffffffttttttt* I need to get this over with."

Thomas with sweat on his forehead set out to solve the exam as fast as possible, every minute that passed was suffering, in his head there were two worries: failing the exam because of his urgency or making a fool of himself in front of his peers with disgusting, loud farts heralding an even worse climax.

*pffftttttt PPPFFFFFttttttttttttttt* *GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR*.

Time was ticking away, 20 minutes to go and Thomas had 80 questions solved, his stomach was making it known how upset he was as he released increasingly raucous air, small voices could be heard opining on the recent change of atmosphere in the room, the professor although looking just as annoyed as every day you could tell he also noticed the smell and possibly who was causing it, or at least that was what Thomas thought.

With 15 minutes left before the end, Thomas handed the test to a disgruntled teacher, then walking out of the room, closed the door and *PPPPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFTFTTTTTTTTTTTT* a huge fart echoed through the halls, Thomas knew he needed a bathroom, "No way I'm going to the bathrooms here, maybe someone will hear me…" and running he headed to the bus stop to return to the comfort of his home.

Blake:

Like his brother, Blake took the bus, not to go take some silly test, but to meet his friends at the usual gym. On the bus he started to feel a slight stomach ache: "Must be the protein shake I took" he lifted his body a little and *PPFFFFTTTTTT* a short but loud fart was present on the bus, many people frowned at such a display of impoliteness from our gymbro, while he didn't flinch at all, it was the smell of a real man.

10 minutes passed and he finally arrived at the gym, upon entering he saw his two teammates getting ready for arm day (yep, a Saturday).

Blake: "Hey don't start without me!"

"Then take this barbell and get started bro!"

Blake sat down and with one arm did several reps, sweat was in the air, *GGGRGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR*, Blake stopped, set the barbell aside and held his stomach.

"What's wrong bro?"

Blake: "Something's wrong with my stomach, I think…"

*PPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTT*

A stormy fart came out of him, even the weight bed couldn't properly catch the smell, his friends laughed along with him, but inside Blake knew something was wrong, but he wouldn't ruin his Saturday of arms and He continued with the reps.

"Wow it sure does stink."

"Yeah, it looks like your pipe is clogged with something and wants to get rid of all the crap you eat."

Blake: "Shut up, if yours are worse".

"No way bro"

Twenty more minutes passed and the pain wouldn't stop, Blake felt several gases inside him that for some reason he couldn't release, his tight sleeveless shirt was completely sweaty, not from a few simple repetitions, but from the pain and heaviness he felt.

"Hey, hand me that weight that's at your feet Blake."

Blake got up from the seat, moved forward a couple of steps and crouched down, a big mistake:

*PPPPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT.*

A big wet fart came out of his big butt, the smell spread quickly disgusting even his own buddies.

"Dude! What was that?"

Blake: "I think I have diarrhea…"

Blake held his belly and walked slowly to the gym bathroom, however, these were under maintenance, with no choice, he said goodbye to his gymbros and waited at the bus stop to get home.

Tony:

He didn't have any special activity, every Saturday he always went to the park to get some relaxation from the dystopian home he lived in, he usually feels bad about what they do to his younger brother Alain, but he can't do much about it, he had to be the laughing stock of his other two brothers (especially Blake) until Alain finally grew up, At that moment they treated him more like one of their own, like a brother.

He arrived at a wooden bench in front of a small duck pond, thought about his life, how unlike his brothers, he had never had a partner in his life, it sounded nice, but it was obvious that, if he continued with those attitudes of a shy boy, he would never achieve anything with anyone.

His thoughts were cut off when a familiar sound came: *GRRRRRR* a small gurgle was present bringing with it an incredible acidity, to distract himself from that he decided to resume his walk, "Should I have eaten those brownies? Is that what's causing this heartburn? Was it the chocolate? Sugar? Or the guilt I feel?" 

He paused for a few seconds, closed his eyes, and... *PPPFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTTT*

"Wow, almost and I look like Blake's lol"

The acidity hit him even harder, Tony started sweating when another fart escaped from him: *PPPPFTFFFTFTTFTFTFTF*, it was a hot one, his rectum was starting to burn.

"I think, if it was the brownies, what did they have?"

He bent his knees as another flurry of farts attacked him: *PPPFFFFFFFTTTTTTGT* *PPPFFTFTTFTFTFTFTFTFTF* *GRRRRRRR* *ppftffttftftftftfPPPPPPTPHTTRTRT*

Tony has always had a pretty sensitive stomach compared to his siblings: "I think I need a bathroom right now," his walk went up a notch to become a race with the toilet in his house being the goal, there was no way he would go to those portable toilets in the park.

As he ran the farts became more persistent, smelly and wet, little by little Tony could feel an amorphous mass forming in his intestines struggling to get out.

*PPPFTFTFTFTFTF* *PFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFT* *PPFFFFFTTTT* *PPPFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFT*

Each step meant another exasperating fart announcing the inevitable, before accepting defeat and starting to defecate his beautiful pants, he could see the patio of his house where he could see his sweaty brother Blake.

At Home:

Tony: "Blake, what are you doing here?"

Blake: "I came back from the gym because I'm literally about to have a bout of diarrhea"

Tony: "You too?"

Blake: "I was at the gym when a greasy fart came out of me without warning, I felt my anus burn and the smell..."

Tony: "Ok I got it, I don't need explanations" *PPPFPFFTTFTFTFT*

Blake: "Just like that"

Tony: "Shut up"

After exchanging insults, Thomas' bus arrived and he ran downstairs holding his stomach ignoring his brothers, he tried to open the door, but it was locked.

Thomas: "BUT WHY IS THIS DAMN DOOR LOCKED!?"

Blake: "Wow calm down bro"

Thomas: "YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND! I NEED TO GET TAR OUT OF MY ANUS RIGHT NOW."

Tony: "Like everybody... One minute... the brownies"

Blake: "You think Alain..."

Thomas: "THAT BASTARD WILL PAY ME *GRRRRRRRRRR* after I sit on the porcelain"

The three brothers yelled at Alain from outside the house, while he watched them through the window suffering, it was so amusing that his "Super Cool" brothers were begging for his mercy trying to contain the monsters inside.

The brothers were looking for some entrance that Alain had forgotten, but there was no such thing, in desperation, Blake had an idea:

Blake: "Guys I can't take it anymore *Started walking while undressing*"

Thomas: "Where are you going? *PPPFTFFTFTFT*"

He went to a small bush in front of his house and...

*PPFFTFTFTFTFFT* *PPSHSHPSSSSSSHHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHHSHSHSHSHSHFTTT* *QSHHQHQHHQSHQSHQSHQSHQSHSQ* *PFTFTFTFTFT* *PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS*

Tony: "WHAT THE!"

Blake: "Leaves are natural, not porcelain"

*PPFTTFTFTFTTFTFTFTFT* *SQHHSQHSHSHSQHSHSHSHSHQHHQSHSHSHS* 

Thomas: "Leave me a place bro"

Blake: "There's always a place for the bro family"

Thomas began to undress until a few drops of diarrhea stained his shoes, which changed his mind to look for another alternative.

Thomas: "Maybe I can ask the neighbors to use their bathroom"

Blake: "You miss it *HSHQSHQHSHSHSQHSHSHSHSHSH*, hey Tony, do you want to come with me?"

Tony: "I'll find another *GRRRRR* entry"

The two brothers parted ways, Thomas stepped on the neighbor's lawn when he felt his diarrhea about to come out, he rang the doorbell hoping for some answer, a young boy opened the door and greeted him:

Neighbor: "Hi Thomas! What can I do for you?"

Thomas was surprised by the fact that his neighbor knew his name and he didn't know his neighbor's, but there was no time to ask.

Thomas: "Good afternoon Neighbor, this is embarrassing, but can I use your bathroom please?"

His neighbor couldn't believe it, the reason he knew Thomas' name, even though the two of them didn't socialize was because he was deeply in love with him, and that, overnight, the love of your life knocked on your door and asked to use your bathroom urgently was a stroke of luck that wasn't going to be wasted by him.

Neighbor: "Go ahead, the bathroom is on the second floor"

Thomas started to run, but his speed was cut short by the pain and the strength needed for his legs to contain the demons inside, with both hands he began to hold his stomach and began to bend slowly, the neighbor asked if Thomas was okay and with a tired and weakened voice said: "No"

*PFGTFTFTTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFT* *QSHSHSHQHSHSHSQHQSHSHSHSHHS* *PFTFTTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTTTTTTTTTF* *RPPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFT*

Thomas shit his pants at his neighbor's house, with his neighbor nearby staring at him, Thomas was embarrassed, sweating profusely and another seizure began:

*PRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPR* *PSPSPSSHSHSHSHSHSHHHHHHHHH* *PFTFTFTFTFT* *PPPFFTFTFTTFTFTFTFTFTF* *PPPPPSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS*

Thomas: "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to"

Neighbor: "No... Don't apologize, this can happen to anyone, and it doesn't bother me either..."

Thomas: "Oh... *PSHHSPSHSSHHPSHPSHSPHPHSHPSPHPHPHSSHHHHHHHHHHPRPRPRPR*"

Neighbor: "Don't worry, I'll help you clean up later, let me... Blow... to the bathroom..."

Thomas: "Thank you..."

While this was happening, Tony was desperate, he was about to take the free place of Blake's bush until he saw something peculiar, the window that looked into his parents' room was open, something that reminded him that when he and his brothers were looking, that window was totally closed, did Alain take pity on him?, one more growl alerted him and very carefully opened the window completely and entered as slowly as possible to Let nothing from the inside be expelled to the outside without warning.

He entered the silent room, ran to the half-open door of his parents' bathroom, the urgency was so great that he did not notice the smell of the room and neither did the fact that his father was sitting on the throne.

They were both frightened, Tony covered his eyes and wanted to leave the spacious bathroom until he was stopped by his father's voice:

Todd: "Son, why did you come in through the window?"

Tony: "The house was totally locked, so I decided to come in here and use your bathroom dad."

Todd: "And why not use yours?"

Tony: "That's what I'm going to do at this... *PFPFPPPFPFFTFTFTTFTTF* moment"

Todd: "Looks like your *PLOP* knows what happened to my laxative, huh?"

Tony: "Laxative!? *GRRRRRRRRR* that bastard... Aghhh I can't even take a step, I'm going to shit on the floor."

Todd: "Of course not, use this bathroom"

After a choppy fart, Todd got up from the toilet unashamedly showing off his long, hairy penis to his son Tony: "All yours champ."

Tony: "You're going to clean up... or?"

Todd: "I Still Feel Like My Stomach Is Still Cooking, I'm Not Going To Waste Paper"

Tony ignoring the image in his head of his father's stained buttocks, began to undress in embarrassment as he approached the toilet, the water was brown, in the center was a large sausage, apparently several days old in Todd's stomach, Tony uncomfortably sat his pale butt on the sweaty and hot toilet lid:

*PFFFFFFFFFFTFTFTFTTFTFTFTF* *QSHHSHSQHSHSQHHSQHSHSQH* *PLOP* *PLOP* *PLOP* *PRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPR* *PLOP* *PLOP* *PRRRRRRPSPSPSSSSSSSSSSS*

Tony: "AGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH"

Todd: "You weren't lying about the urgency..." 

Tony: "Not now, Dad..."

*PRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPR* *QSGQQSHHSQHHQSHQHHSQSQ* *PPFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTTFFF* *GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR*

Todd: "Not even I, who have been constipated, have come to that, you can be a champion!"

Tony: "I want to die..."

*PLOP* *PLOP* *PLOP* PPPPFFTFTTFTFTFTFTFTFPPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPPRPRPRP* *QSHHSQHSHSQHHSHHSHSQQH* *PPSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS*

After 5 minutes, Tony's stomach calmed down enough to leave his father's bathroom and continue in his own. 

Todd: "Well done son, now save me a spot, I feel like I'm going to break your record in a few seconds."

Tony got up and didn't clean himself, he turned around and saw the mess, the brown soup increased in size where several sections had different consistencies, colors and smells, and from this stood out his father's sausage now bathed in Tony's diarrhea.

When Tony left the room he saw Blake waving at him from the window, Tony covered his crotch and opened the door for him:

Blake: "Did you shit on yourself? And how did you get in?"

Tony: "None of your business..."

Blake: "After Tony arrives, the three of us show Alain who he's playing..."

Finally, after 1 hour, Thomas arrived with clothes borrowed from his neighbor, he didn't want to talk to anyone and locked himself in his room.

P.S. This will be the story that starts the week-long daily story marathon.

[stray-cat-21]

The Pariah and the Freak

Chapter One: how it all began

Summary: After a long time obsession Eddie Munson finds a way to make the queen of Hawkins High all his and only his.

Part summary: Eddie putting his plan into action and getting together with the girl of his many dreams.

Warning: This is a DARK fic involving forced pregnancy / Eddie baby trapping reader without her knowing. do not keep reading if that makes you uncomfortable or if you’re under 18! It’s definitely soft but still dark Eddie

Sweet, beautiful, caring, compassionate were all words that could be used to describe (Y/n) (y/l/n). She was head cheerleader as well as the somewhat queen of Hawkins high. However unlike most of the cheer squad and jocks she was wasn’t cruel to those not in her social group. Even the nerds, geeks, dorks, losers, and freaks adored her. Eddie Munson was no exception to her beauty and charm.

They definitely weren’t friends she didn’t really know anything about him. They’ve never hung out, and they haven’t exchanged more than ten words but she never insulted him or anyone else in Hellfire. In fact on multiple occasions she stopped one of the jocks from harassing the club. Those things alone lead to Eddie having quite the heavy crush on her.

Now just because she wasn’t cruel to him or his friends doesn’t mean they spoke often. The pair had three classes together and sat on opposite ends of the cafeteria. She just simply didn’t really take much notice of him when he wasn’t putting on some sort of show. For all six years of knowing her he had struggled with ways of getting her attention. If he couldn’t get her to fully notice him how could he get her to be his?

The idea came to Eddie one day while smoking a cigarette in the trailer park on a picnic table. Two of the park moms were sat out front one of their homes smoking and drinking boxed wine while loudly complaining about their lives and how they ended up there. The one with dyed red hair lets out a long exhausted sigh. “I should’ve never listened to him about not usin a condom Cathy, I could’ve been married to Phil Blake he’s a doctor now” she exhales with a puff of smoke. “He baby trapped ya Trisha that’s exactly what he did no good bastard” the other agrees.

Eddie sat up straight listening a little closer. He had heard rumors of women ‘baby trapping’ men but never the other way around. Could it be the answer to his prayers? The solution to his life’s struggle? Now he just had to figure out how to get the most popular girl in town to not only sleep with him but do it unsafely.

Thankfully that comes to him pretty easily too. He’s in his last period class not focusing on the assignment at hand instead listening to the two girls in front of him conversing. The class was doing busy work while the teacher got caught up on things. As long as things didn’t get too loud he allowed them to talk. The two cheerleaders were discussing the party of the week hosted courtesy of the basketball team.

“Jason says Josh’s parents are out of town all weekend”

“Lucky Josh”

“You’re coming right? I was hoping we could get ready together”

“Yes I desperately need to get out of my house especially if it involves drinking and dancing”

“There should be plenty of that knowing the guys. Do you wanna sleep over?”

“Sounds great Chrissy as long as your mom doesn’t make us those granola cookies or jog laps again”

The girls quietly erupt into laughter recalling a prior sleepover and just like that Eddie has a plan. All he has to do is score an invitation to this party and everything he’s ever wanted will be his. (Y/n) will be his and only his.

The party is crowded with way too many drunk teenagers. The music is loud and shitty. This is not how Eddie Munson wants to spend a Friday night but for her he decides it’s worth it. For her and for his baby Eddie will suffer through this meathead’s party.

He makes his way through the living room pushing past his peers until he spots one of the hosts of the party Josh, aka number 20 of the basketball team. Josh could be the face of the dumb jock stereotype. He’s only cruel when he’s joining in with his peers. Basically the human equivalent of a dog who does whatever you say. Eddie waves a ringed hand holding up the paper bag he had brought.

“Munson fuck yeah man!” Josh laughs with a slur making his way over. In the bag is an assortment of ziplock bags filled with different drugs. Some of the pot is definitely weak since Eddie had to give Josh way too good of a deal to convince him to let him come to the party. Josh pulls out a wad of cash shoving it forward which Eddie accepts handing him the bag. “Good shit, stick around dude have a drink might make you loosen up or somethin” the drunk high schooler says wondering back to his friends.

Eddie rolls his eyes and wonders back into the main part of the party. It’s a sea of faces made up of cheerleaders, preps, partiers, and everything between. He can see a few party goers giving him dirty looks and mutterings of wondering why the freak is in their territory. When he finally spots (Y/n) she’s dancing with Chrissy. Both girls are clearly tipsy already their movements much sloppier than they normally were during their cheers.

They’re giggling and taking turns spinning each other even though it doesn’t match the music at all. Eddie can’t help but think he can’t wait to dance with her. Slow dancing in the kitchen the only thing between them her baby bump. Eddie can’t help but smile at the thought. Their dancing is interrupted by Jason coming up to borrow Chrissy which (y/n) allows despite her disappointment.

(Y/n) let’s out a breath looking around and their eyes meet. A small smile blossoms on her face as she casually walks over to him. “Eddie Munson at a party, well now I’ve seen everything” she teases with a kind smile. She isn’t making fun of him or being rude she’s genuinely surprised he’s here and he’d go as far to say she looks pleased. “Must be a sign of the impending apocalypse or something” he teases back.

She laughs face lighting up with amusement. “Did you come to protest our conformist ways?” She asks curiously. “No just to make googly eyes at Carver, he’s playing hard to get” Eddie jokes. (Y/n) laughs again and Eddie can’t help but think he’d talk forever if she kept making that sound. “I was just here to make a sale” Eddie shrugs.

“So you’re not staying?” She asks. Eddie can’t help but revel in the small bit of disappointment evident on her features. She wants him to stay, she wants him around. “Not really my scene” Eddie shrugs.

“Oh come on stick around you never come to these things” she begs placing a hand on his forearm. Eddie looks from her to the door as if he’s honestly thinking it over. “I guess one drink wouldn’t hurt” he sighs smiling. (Y/n) lights up smiling a little wider.

“Yay that’s great!” The way she cheers for Eddie in the way that’s normally reserved for the schools star athletes makes his heart swell. “Here I’ll get you a refill sweetheart while I get one” Eddie offers out his hand to take her cup. He doesn’t miss the way the nickname makes her a bit bashful as she hands him the empty cup. “Don’t go running off on me now Munson” she calls after him when he begins heading back to the kitchen.

Thankfully the table covered in an assortment of beverages is temporarily unoccupied since the bartender is . Eddie pours them both a drink before slipping out the small two ziplock bag containing only two pills. They were much harder to get than his other substances but thankfully there was a guy the next town over. Once (y/n)’s drink is mixed he returns to find her saving him a spot on a two person love seat.

The small chair doesn’t allow for too much space between them so his leg presses against her own. “Thank you” she grins when he passes her the red solo cup. “Anytime princess” Eddie responds. It was usually a nickname reserved for DnD or for making fun of spoiled rich popular girls but for her he’d make an exception. Again Eddie isn’t oblivious to the effect the nickname has on her.

“You’re quite charming you know that?”

“Am I?”

“Yeah I didn’t know you were so sweet, guess I always thought you were kinda…”

“Mean and scary?”

“I’m sorry”

“It’s okay I kinda thought you were mean and scary too”

“Really me scary?”

“Terrifying”

“Careful Munson I’ll get you with my pompoms”

“See what did I tell ya scary. You give Kruger and Voorhees a run for their money” 

“I guess you know my terrible secret, I’m really the evil cheerleader of doom”

“Oh of doom?”

“Yea of doom! I’ll slay you down all while wearing a cheer skirt”

By the end the two are laughing hysterically coming up with her evil villain origin story. He had no idea she’d be so easy to talk to let alone kind of a dork. Maybe she’s only so open because of the alcohol or maybe it’s just who she is he can’t quite figure that part out. However it doesn’t really matter so long as she keeps laughing and touching his arm like that.

“You’d make a great comic book villain sweetheart” Eddie says taking a sip from his drink. Her smile brightens and he watches the way she ducks her a head little as if trying to cover up such a beautiful sight. Eddie reaches his hand out gently tilting her chin so she’s looking up at him again. “Nuh uh if I have to stay at this party you can’t go hiding from me” he teases. The act clearly catches her off guard but she doesn’t move away or push his hand away.

Eddie almost thinks he could get away with kissing her but he doesn’t push his luck moving his hand away. “There you go being all sweet again” she muses. “Shh don’t say that too loud you’ll ruin my reputation” Eddie says in a mock whisper. “Oh and what makes me worthy of knowing the real Eddie Munson?” (Y/n) teases. “Well it must be reserved for only the prettiest girl in school” Eddie shrugs looking down at his cup.

“You think I’m pretty?” She asks. Eddie’s a little surprised by the question. (Y/n) isn’t fishing for compliments or trying to get him to spill his guts, she’s really asking if he’s telling the truth. “Beautiful” Eddie scoffs. The admission makes her bite her lip looking off again.

“You’re not like most guys you know. I don’t think I’ve ever been complimented so much”

“That’s a shame sweetheart.”

“Maybe it’s the age difference, you’re older, wiser than the guys on the team”

“And now I’m old?”

(Y/n) opens her mouth to say something else but is cut off by someone yelling. “What the hell are you doing here freak?” Jason spits. (Y/n) winces while Eddie just lets out a sigh. “Carver so lovely to see you” Eddie says with a mocking grin. One of Jason’s goons grab Eddie by the collar yanking him up from the chair.

Most of the room is looking on at the scene. (Y/n) jumps up from her spot. “Come on guys knock it off we’re just trying to enjoy the party” she says glaring at Jason. “She’s right Jason let’s just go” Chrissy pleads tugging on the sleeve of Jason’s jacket. Jason shrugs his girlfriend off stepping closer to Eddie despite being shorter and far less intimidating.

“Party’s invitation only freak, get lost before I make you” Jason threatens shoving him. Josh looks worried as he keeps his eyes on the ground waiting to be ratted out to his team mates. “I invited him Jason he’s my date” (y/n) snaps quickly grabbing Eddie’s hand. Jason and the rest of the guys look over at her shocked so do Eddie and Chrissy. “And why the hell would you do that?” The blonde asks.

“Jason dude what’s it matter let’s just go back to partying” Josh finally speaks up. “Yeah man who gives a shit he’s here?” Patrick agrees. Jason finally gives up his stare down storming away. Chrissy mouths an apology to her friend scurrying off after them. (Y/n) takes a deep breath looking back towards Eddie.

“You okay?” She asks worriedly. “Yeah sweetheart nothing I’m not used to. Besides this time I had the cheerleader of doom here to protect me” Eddie winks. (Y/n) breathes out a laugh shaking her head a little. She still hasn’t let go of his hand and Eddie can’t help but move his thumb against her skin.

“You might wanna be careful though going around saying you’re on a date with me wouldn’t want to tarnish your reputation” Eddie explains. (Y/n) shrugs smiling nonchalantly. “Not the worst rumor I’ve ever heard about myself” (y/n) laughs. Eddie nods understandably. “Gotta be a new high point for mine.”

The two talk for a while more about whatever crosses their minds. They get to know each other at least on a basic level, joke around, and tease each other. Hell she even convinces him to dance with her for a bit since it is a date after all. He’s having so much fun Eddie almost wants to consider changing his mind on the whole plan but but kidding by how (y/n) seems to get more tired by the minute he thinks it too late for that. She’s in his arms slightly swaying to the music when Eddie notices she’s leaning on him a lot more and slurring her words.

“You alright sweetheart?” Eddie asks tucking his chin down to look at her. (Y/n) nods her eyebrows furrowed and she closes her eyes for a second. “Um yeah I uh I think I need to sit down” she answers slowly. “Shit here sit back down, I’ll get Chrissy okay don’t move a muscle” Eddie orders helping her back into the chair. (Y/n) nods leaning back into the cushions.

Eddie speeds off back towards the kitchen. Thankfully Chrissy is without her guard dog talking to someone from student council who gives Eddie a dirty look. From what he could hear from the conversation the other student was concerned why the (Y/n) (y/l/n) was on a date with the freak show. “Sorry to interrupt but I think (y/n) needs you Chrissy she’s not lookin too good” Eddie says worriedly. Chrissy frowns immediately following Eddie without a word to their classmate.

(Y/n) was just barely staying awake eyes fluttering shut before snapping open again. “Hey hon it’s me you feeling alright?” She asks pressing a hand to her friends forehead. “I don’t know what happened, we were talking and she got really dizzy and tired” Eddie explains. “Maybe she’s just drunk I don’t know will you help me get her upstairs?” She frets looking up at Eddie desperately. Eddie quickly nods leaning down to gently pull (y/n) up hoisting her up bridal style.

“Come on sweetheart I’ve got ya” he breathes carefully upstairs following Chrissy. She leads the pair to an empty bedroom that was off limits. Eddie is gentle when he lays (y/n) down helping her fully into the bed. Chrissy is anxiously biting her thumb nail looking down at her best friend. (Y/n) is softly breathing but hasn’t moved a muscle or spoken since they started heading upstairs.

“She ever gotten drunk like this before?”

“Drunk sure but she’s never been like this before oh god do you think it’s alcohol poisoning? She’ll freak if she has to have her stomach pumped”

“I doubt it did she do anything but drink maybe smoke something?”

“No she couldn’t have I was with her till you got there all she had was two drinks I thought. Oh god Eddie do you think someone drugged her or something? Like one of those tapes they make us watch in school?”

“If so they’re about to learn how much of a freak I can be”

Eddie practically growls the sentence out low and angry as if someone had really hurt his girl. Chrissy looks at him stunned taken back by his concern. “Thank god you were here what if some creep had found her” the blonde frets. Eddie is about to respond but the door slams open making them both turn around. Jason enters the room looking pissed off.

The angry, tipsy athlete storms towards his girlfriend. “Chrissy what the hell are you doing with this freak” Jason spits never taking his eyes of Eddie. “Jason something’s wrong with (y/n) I think we need to take her to the hospital” Chrissy answers. “She’s a big girl she shouldn’t have gotten wasted if she couldn’t handle it” Jason demands. “Not her fault one of your pervert friends drugged her” Eddie says.

“What the hell did you just say?” Jason growls stepping towards Eddie. Chrissy pushes herself between the two as much as she can. “Jason stop it please (y/n) really needs help, he was just helping” Chrissy promises. “Helping, he’s probably the one who did it fucking freak” Jason accuses. Eddie narrows his eyes down at him.

“Eddie will you please grab (y/n) some water?” Chrissy pleads facing the metal head. “Sure thing Chrissy” Eddie nods making sure his shoulder bumps Jason on his way out of the room. Even just outside the door he can hear the couple fighting. As much as he hates it for Chrissy’s sake since she’s always been nice to him it’s a good sign for his plan.

When Eddie returns to the room Chrissy and Jason are long gone just as he expected. Eddie peaks around the empty hallway before shutting the door making sure it’s locked tight. His breathing is shaky and his body is trembling in excitement as he approaches the foot of the bed. This is it finally his shot.

Laid out across the bed peaceful and unmoving (Y/n) looks straight out of a fairy tale. His very own sleeping princess that can only be saved by his love. Her eyes are shut just slightly fluttering every so often. Painted red lips parted just slightly allowing her slow breaths to escape.

The mattress dips under his weight as Eddie kneels down onto the bed. He lowers himself down till he’s hovering just above her. His ring covered hand reaches up to move a stray hair from her face before sliding it down to her cheek. “So beautiful” he whispers. Slowly Eddie leans down till his lips are ghosting over her own.

His head is clouded with anticipation, anxiety, nervousness, and even a little guilt deep deep down. Swallowing back the conflicting emotions Eddie takes the plunge connecting their lips together. Just like he’d always daydreamed her lips are pillowy soft. They melt against his anxiety bitten lips like cotton candy.

When his tongue finds its way into her mouth Eddie sucks in a sharp breath through his nose. Cherry coke mixed with cheep vodka lingers on her tongue flooding Eddie’s tastebuds. It’s a flavor he will now cherish forever because it’s hers. Her gentle slow breaths hit his skin and his fans against her resting face.

When Eddie finally pulls himself away from her now glossy barely swollen lips he doesn’t go far. Instead his wet searing kisses move across her cheekbone, down to her chin and up her neck all the way to her ear. “I’m gonna love you so good sweetheart I promise. Gonna make you and our baby so god damn happy” he breathes.

He lifts away from her face looking over her body. So badly does Eddie want to take his time. He wants to cherish every square inch of her skin, slowly pull her clothes off and tell her why he loves every part of her body, enter slowly with his fingers warming her up and stretching her out, eating her out till she begs him to just stuff her full, making love to her the way she deserves. Only he’s already painfully hard, this is his first time, and he has to hurry. Still though it would be rude not to warm her up.

His hands move down to her skirt and Eddie pushes it up to her waist. (Y/n) chose some see through black panties for the evening that Eddie can tell are already wet. A moan escapes his throat knowing he’s turning her on even in her unconscious state. He’s quick but careful as he pulls them off picketing them in his back pocket for later. There’s not much light in the room just the soft moonlight coming in from the window revealing her wet lips to him.

Eddie reaches up two ringed fingers spreading her pussy open to him. “Fuck you’ve even got a pretty pussy baby can’t wait to see it drooling my cum” Eddie groans. He moves a thumb to her clit slowly circling it. (Y/n)’s body makes a small movement and in her sleep she lets a a soft moan like sound. Eddie continues the motion in varying speeds and pressures seeing which ones make her the most wet.

“That’s it pretty girl need you nice and wet gonna make you cum then fuck you full alright” Eddie breathes moving his other hand to push two fingers into her. She’s tight around even his fingers clenching around them. Once he’s got the rhythm and technique down it’s not hard to make her come undone.

“Fuck” Eddie groans pulling his now soaking wet fingers out of her. He’s quick to shove them into his mouth moaning aloud at the taste. Once their licked clean he moves his hands to his belt fumbling with the buckle till it’s undone and he can properly shove his jeans down his legs. His cock springs free slapping his stomach head red and dripping with precum. Eddie gives it a few strokes looking over her again.

Even just the feeling of the head of his cock lining up with her entrance has Eddie ready to lose it but he holds back. With a slow but hard thrust he’s bottomed out completely balls deep buried in her pussy. “Fucking christ” he moans voice high pitched with pleasure. He thought she was right wrapped around his fingers but this? This is next level.

Another rock of his hips rolls his cock sweetly into her lurching her body against the bed. Lifting her legs up Eddie carefully placing them over his shoulders. Each time his cock comes out even more wet in her own pleasure. She’s completely unaware she’s soaking the ‘freaks’ cock so much.

The thrusts get harder shaking the bed while Eddie fucks into her sleeping form. He has to bite hard into his lip to keep his moans down. “Holy shit sweetheart this pussy is made for my fucking cock, gonna ruin you for any of those assholes” Eddie whispers. His hand moves up to her blouse bunching it up around her neck. Now each time he thrusts into her he can watch her tits bounce.

“When we do this next time gonna make you really enjoy it sweetheart I swear. You’ll be awake and screaming my name.”

“Maybe I’ll bend you over in your cheer skirt and fuck you behind the bleachers let you go back to practice stuffed full of the freak’s cum.”

“Oh shit so fucking tight sweetheart taking me so well”

“Fuck fuck fuck” Eddie groans louder with each obscenity. His cum floods her walls. Once his balls have completely emptied into her pussy he slowly pulls out watching some of his cum ooze from her abused cunt. His fingers are quick to catch it and push it right back in. Eddie takes a minute to catch his breath while getting his clothes fixed.

Big brown eyes are transfixed at her used up pussy. He wonders if once he gets her back to the trailer if she’ll still be asleep enough to go another round. Eddie does his best to get her cleaned up straightening up her clothes before throwing one of her arms over his shoulder. Part of him hates how easy it is to get her unconscious body out of the party but for now he’s slightly grateful for everyone’s lack of care for anyone but themselves.

(Y/n) groans opening her eyes sunlight filling most of her vision. Her head is throbbing, she feels nauseous, and she knows something doesn’t feel right. She sits up opening her eyes again. Her surroundings are unfamiliar, this isn’t her room or Chrissy’s or any of the other cheerleaders. Looking down she also sees the clothes on her body aren’t her own.

Panic fills her chest and for a moment she worries the vomit might spill from her throat. (Y/n) pushes the blanket away from her legs looking at the oversized shirt with the words Iron Maiden scribbled in a peeling font across the fabric along with a pair of plaid pajama pants. Her eyes dart up scanning her surroundings. Thankfully they land on at least something, or someone familiar. Eddie Munson slumped in a small white chair using his jacket as a blanket.

Small snores leave his opened mouth and his hair is sticking all over the place. This was Eddie Munson’s room. It makes sense given the posters on the walls, the music equipment and the ash tray. Even if things are still a blur at least she knows where she is.

As if sensing her presence Eddie begins to wake up. The snoring stops and his brown eyes slowly blink open. With a deep yawn his eyes finally meet hers and it seems to wake him up instantly. “Shit you’re awake, how are you feeling?” He questioned jumping up from his chair. His jacket falls to the floor with a loud thud as Eddie makes his way over to the bed side.

“Um not great” she answers truthfully. Eddie winces nodding his head. “I’ll uh grab you some water and then we can talk alright?” He suggests. (Y/n) nods watching him hurry out of the room. When he returns Eddie not only has a glass of water but some Tylenol.

“Thanks Eddie” (y/n) sighs gratefully taking a large sip. “Better?” He asks voice still quiet and careful. (Y/n) hums setting the half empty cup back down. “Can I sit?” Eddie asks gesturing towards his own bed. (Y/n) nods pulling her legs towards her body allowing him room in front of her.

“So what do you remember?”

“Not much I remember meeting up with you at the party, arguing with Jason and then it gets fuzzy.”

“After we talked to Jason we were sitting in the living room and you started getting dizzy and slurring your words. I got Chrissy and we helped you upstairs. Jason found us and started arguing with Chrissy yelling at me you know his normal shit.”

“I do kinda remember yelling.”

“She begged me to just go get you some water and when I got back they were both gone and I found you alone in the room.”

“So you brought me to your home?”

“I swear I looked for Chrissy again sweetheart or at least someone who could tell me where you live but I couldn’t find her and no one would trust me with your address.”

“And my clothes?”

“Well you kinda threw up and some got on your shirt. And since you were in a skirt I just pulled the pajama pants up I swear I didn’t look at anything!”

“It’s okay I believe you”

“I just got you here and then realized that might look really bad when you woke up but fuck I couldn’t leave you there”

He looks genuinely worried that she might not believe him or that he’s worried that she’s accusing him of something. Eddie Munson school ‘freak’ slept on a far too small chair in order to make her comfortable in his bed. She had gotten too drunk at a party and passed out and he spent his entire night taking care of her. (Y/n) placed her hand over his giving it a gentle squeeze. “Thank you Eddie” she says softly with a small smile.

“There is more” he says quietly. (Y/n) just looks at him to continue. Eddie takes a deep breath running his hand through his hair. “When I found you your um your clothes were messed up like your skirt was crooked, your shirt was mostly pushed up, and your uh- your urm panties were gone” Eddie explains clearing his throat. “Oh god” (y/n) whispers.

The nauseous feeling returns all too quickly and (y/n) physically pales. “I’m gonna be sick” she mumbles. Eddie is quick to grab the small metal waste basket handing it to her. Not more than a minute later she’s puking up the water since it was the only thing in her stomach. She expects Eddie to turn around but instead he sits at her side pulling her hair out of the way with one hand and stroking her back with the other.

When she’s done he pulls the basket away offering her the water again. Tears prick in her eyes and blur her vision she can’t even make out the glass. Eddie scrambles to set the glass down wrapping his arms around her. She isn’t exactly sobbing but tears are streaking down her cheeks breathing broken and coming in harsh inhales. Eddie hold her tightly to his chest soothing her to the best of his ability.

“Need you to breathe for me sweetheart can you do that? Follow me okay just take a deep breath” he instructs. Eddie shows her by breathing like that himself his chest rising and falling against her. It takes a couple minutes but she starts to mimic his movements. He’s able to calm her down finally.

“I’m okay I’m okay” she sniffles wiping her face. It’s not true she’s definitely still freaked out but she manages to hold back the tears for now. “I looked but uh there was no one close so I settled with getting you out of there but if you want me to go with you to the cops or anything just say the word. Whatever you need from me I’m here” Eddie explains. (Y/n) nods quietly knowing that even if they both went to the cops nothing could be done but it was nice he would be there for whatever came next.

“Are you um hungry?” Eddie asks changing the subject. “Yeah actually starving” (y/n) admits recalling the fact that she barely had five chips and a bunch of alcohol for dinner the night prior. “Let’s get you some food sweetheart” Eddie grins helping her out of his bed. Even through the haziness of the second part of the evening she remembers having a lot of fun with Eddie before the fact. (Y/n) recalls how sweet and charming he had been with her.

“We do have to be kinda quiet my uncle is asleep in the living room”

“You live with your uncle?”

“Yeah he took me in when I was in eighth grade. But he works the graveyard shift”

She quietly follows Eddie to the kitchen leaning against one of the counters while he raids the fridge. “So we don’t have a lot and I’m uh not the most experienced chef but I can make some killer scrambled eggs and toast” Eddie says peaking at her over the fridge door. “Sounds great Eddie” (y/n) laughs. “Perfect my kinda girl” Eddie says grabbing the egg carton and milk. (Y/n) watches him while he collects the supplies with a thoughtful look on his face.

“You know what I do remember last night?”

“What’s that?”

“Having a really good time with you”

“It was a lot of fun princess”

Before the conversation can continue Eddie accidentally knocked over a pan causing it to clatter. “Shit” he mumbled scrambling to pick it up. There’s a groan from the living room and not two minutes later a tired looking older man shuffles into the kitchen. “Fuck I’m sorry Wayne” Eddie frowns. “It’s alright son nice to see you eating somethin before noon” Wayne says with a yawn.

“I’ll get coffee started” Eddie says heading to the pot. Wayne catches notice of the girl standing in the kitchen. He eyes his nephew for a moment before looking back to (Y/n). “You plannin on introducing me to your friend here” Wayne teases. “Oh uh Wayne this is (Y/n), (y/n) this is my uncle Wayne” Eddie says.

Wayne’s eyes widen and he smirks. “Oh this is (Y/n), the (Y/n) I’ve been told so much about?” He asks. (Y/n) looks towards Eddie with a teasing smile. Eddie’s face reddened and he sent his uncle a look. “Wayne man come on” he groaned focusing back on the coffee.

(Y/n) laughed offering out her hand to Wayne. “Nice to meet you Wayne, I haven’t heard much but it’s all been great” she smiles. “You too darlin” he chuckled shaking his head. Wayne grabbed his coffee before excusing himself to the bathroom. “That was humiliating” Eddie sighs going back to his cooking.

“So you talk about me to your uncle?” (Y/n) asks curiously. “I’ve probably mentioned you once or twice” Eddie shrugs. (Y/n) suppresses a laugh offering a kind hand on his shoulder. “Small school not many new faces and names right?” She offers him a way out of his torment. “Right yeah exactly” Eddie smirks.

Eddie thinks he could used to this, cooking her breakfast while she’s dressed in his clothes. Laughing with Wayne, drinking coffee, laughing over burnt toast, he wants the whole nine yards. Now he just needs to hope his plan worked. Little does he know she’s thinking something pretty similar. (Y/n) can’t remember the last time she’s had a better time then the last day she’s spent with Eddie.

(Y/n) spends breakfast getting to know both Munson men. She hears stories of little Eddie, learns about Corroded Coffin, and about why his uncle has so many coffee cups. It’s a nice way to spend a Sunday morning. Even though it’s small the trailer feels like a real home, somewhere happy memories are made. After the fact Wayne begins to clean up while Eddie changes and (y/n) decides to help.

“I promise darlin it’s not a problem I may look old but I can handle it”

“No please really I’d like to help, earn my keep you know”

Wayne shakes his head with a small smile. Once upon a time Eddie had used that very phrase over and over again. “Well alright I’d like the company anyway” Wayne shrugs. The two are quiet grabbing up the dishes they had used.

“You know, Mr. Munson”

“Wayne is just fine”

“Wayne, Eddie is a really good guy you should be proud of him”

“Oh really now?”

“Yeah, I mean obviously you already knew that but knowing Eddie even just a little I imagine that’s not something either of you hear a lot”

“No I reckon it’s not”

“I just don’t know many guys that would have done what he did for me last night”

Wayne doesn’t ask what happened but he does put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “Well thank you for sayin so darlin” he says quietly. (Y/n) nods giving him a kind smile. The two go back to cleaning up while Wayne tells her another funny story from when Eddie was younger.

A little while later Eddie and (y/n) are sat in the front seat of Eddie’s van. An Iron Maiden tape plays quietly on the radio when the van pulls into her parent’s driveway. It was definitely the slowest Eddie has ever driven in his entire life, hell he thinks he might have broken a law by going so slow. But he was in no rush to get her home.

“So can I walk you to the door or do we need to sneak you in a window?” Eddie muses. (Y/n) laughs shaking her head. “You can walk me to the door if you’d like” she answers. Eddie grins exiting the van with her. The two make the short trip to the door in silence until she’s stood in front of him.

“Well here you are princess” Eddie says gesturing to her house. Not wanting him to leave just yet (y/n) doesn’t turn to leave or enter her house. “Thank you again Eddie, for everything” she says. “It was fun, I’m sorry again about the uh circumstances” Eddie shrugs. (Y/n) nods looking away from him.

Eddie’s fingers fidget at his sides wanting to tilt her chin up and kiss her. Treat this like he was just a normal guy bringing her home from a great date and giving her a goodbye kiss. Only that’s not what this is yet. In her own mind (y/n) is desperate to come up with something else to say. She just wants five more minutes with him.

Suddenly she lights up gently grabbing Eddie’s forearm which startled him just a little. “Your number um can I have your phone number?” She blurts. The second the question leaves her mouth she’s humiliated. (Y/n) was used to being the one being begged for her number and it was usually at the end of a date. “How about a trade?” Eddie grins.

(Y/n) nods with a smile feeling relieved. Eddie jogs back towards his van fumbling around in the front seat for a couple minutes. “Goch ya” he exclaims exiting the vehicle marker in hand. Eddie is triumphant as he hands her the black marker. Uncapping it (y/n) gently scrawls her name against the back of his palm.

Watching her write down each number Eddie feels more and more joyful. Forget the bats and the puppet master, screw the spider or his wyvern. The ink now covering his hand is by far his new favorite. The black inky numbers are made even better when she finishes it with a small heart. For just a brief moment he considers buying a bunch of gloves so he could get away with tattooing it for real.

“There you go” she breathes reaching to hand him back the sharpie. “Looks great sweetheart hurt a lot less than my other ones” he teases capturing his hand in his own. (Y/n) has to look down again staring at the pavement beneath their shoes while he writes down his own digits. She wonders if he’s consciously making the decision to run his thumb against her fingers or not. Instead of a heart Eddie adds a tiny devil head for his own little touch.

When he’s done Eddie uses his teeth to recap the marker while not letting go of her hand. He admires his work for a second before bringing her hand to his lips gently kissing her knuckles. “All done” he says quietly as he lowers their hands. “What do you think do I look metal?” She jokes. “Oh so metal” Eddie teases back.

“I uh guess I should go”

“Yeah me too”

“Thank you again Eddie”

“Don’t mention it”

“I’ll bring your clothes on Monday”

“Sure, yeah sure”

Eddie’s a little surprised when she stands up straight enough to kiss him right on the cheekbone. His eyes go wide, cheeks redden and he’s definitely smiling like an idiot. “I’ll see you Monday Eds” (y/n) breathes before hurrying inside. Eddie’s ringed fingers reach up grazing over the spot she had just kissed. The nickname mixed with the kiss swarm his head and make up for the money he lose out on for the pot well worth it.

The following Monday Eddie is a little shocked to see (Y/n) waiting for him at his locker. The minute she spots him approaching (y/n) waves with a bright smile. “Well shit if I got welcomed like this every day I just might show up on time” he teases. “Maybe there’s hope for your education yet Munson” she laughs. (Y/n) surprises Eddie again by stopping to give him a hug.

“What’s this for sweetheart?” He questions softly while still holding her close. “I don’t know just feel like I should thank you” she sighs resting her head against his shoulder. “You’ve done that already a few times now, besides it’s not necessary” he promises her as they separate. (Y/n) nods but still looks unsure. Before either can say anything else there’s a yell of her name and Chrissy is rushing over.

The blonde pulls her best friend into a tight hug. “Oh gosh you’re okay! I’m so sorry I abandoned you!” Chrissy frets her eyes glossy. “Chrissy it’s okay I’m alright” (y/n) assures her. “I was so worried about you but Jason got so mad and made us leave and wouldn’t take no as an answer” Chrissy said with a sniffle.

“I’m okay I promise, Eddie made sure I was taken care of” (y/n) explained looking over at him. Chrissy pulled away from (y/n) quickly hugging Eddie. The metal head is taken back too shocked to react to the fact that he got hugged by the two most popular girls in school. “Thank you thank you so much for looking after her” Chrissy rambles breathlessly. “Uh no problem Chrissy” Eddie shrugs.

By lunch time Eddie and (Y/n) have hung out most of the day. Walking together between classes and only separating to sit in their assigned seats, she’d give him a hug before the classes they didn’t have together, and were even partners for a project in second period. Not having fourth period together Eddie is sat at his usual table when (y/n) arrives to the cafeteria making their way over to the Hellfire Club table. The guys take notice of her approaching before Eddie does.

“Holy shit is (Y/n) (y/l/n) coming over to our table?” Gareth Gawks. “Yeah haven’t you heard her and Eddie are real close lately” Jeff teases nudging Eddie’s arm. “Lucas said the whole basket ball team can’t stop taking about it” Mike adds while Dustin is amazed at what’s happening. “Be nice fuckers, and Gareth move over” Eddie growls under his breath. Gareth huffs out an annoyed breath and everyone groans and complains but moves down.

Eddie puts on a bright charming smile as (y/n) steps up to the table. “Hey Eddie, I was wondering if you’d mind if I sat here with you guys?” (Y/n) asks. “Course we don’t mind do we guys?” Eddie asks looking to the others. The others shake their heads still looking shocked or fearful of their club’s leader. “Thanks guys I appreciate it” she smiles graciously taking a seat next to Eddie.

“No problem sweetheart glad to have you join us” he grins. There’s a heavy awkward silence across the table while the group share surprised confused looks. “Is all that cheer stuff hard? It looks really complicated” Dustin finally speaks up just curious and friendly as he always was. The other guys stare over at him in disbelief.

“Oh not really anymore, it’s a lot more physically straining then people think though” (y/n) answers. Eddie sends Dustin an approving smile and nod. “But I think that Dungeons and Dragons you guys play looks crazy hard with all the math and stuff, seriously I respect it” (y/n) continues. The group quickly falls into comfortable easy conversation about cheer and DnD and anything that comes up. Laughter, and joy fills the table, Dustin even snorts some milk from his nose.

At the end of the day Eddie is heading out to his van when he hears (y/n) calling out to him. “Hey sweetheart I was hoping I’d see you before I left” Eddie greets with a smile. “Hey Eds I uh have your clothes” she says offering out the neatly folded bundle of clothes. Eddie accepts the garments and his fingers graze hers. “Oh sweet, the shirt is actually one of my favorites to sleep in” he explains.

The revelation isn’t lost on her that he allowed her to sleep in his favorite pajama shirt and she can’t help but smile a little. “Hey look I’m sorry if I was like all over you today I swear. I didn’t even realize I was until someone pointed it out last period” she admits a look of guilt blossoming on her features. “You didn’t annoy me sweetheart. We might’ve started a few new rumors but what else is new around here” he jokes back.

“That’s probably true, I don’t know I just-” (y/n) trails off with a sigh looking down at their feet. Eddie frowns tilting her chin up with his hand. “Hey it’s alright you can talk to me, I promise. I’m all ears here” he assures her. (Y/n) looked away unable to look him in the eye.

“Ever since what happened at the party I don’t feel safe around the guys on the team. Like I don’t even know who did it or if they were all involved. I just got to school and I didn’t feel safe with my normal crowd and I remembered how safe you made me feel during the weekend so I just kind of clung to you all day without trying to” she rambles nearly out of breath by the end. Eddie’s face softens as he pulls her into a tight hug.

“You’ve got nothin to worry about alright? I’ll take care of you” he whispers kissing the top of her head. Eddie can feel the way she relaxes letting out a breath and relaxing into his touch. “Thanks Eds” she sighs tightening her hold on him. “Anytime sweetheart anytime” he whispers.

She’s smiling a little when they separate. “So how do you usually get home” he asks despite knowing the answer. “Oh uh usually I ride with Jason and Chrissy but I think I’m gonna walk today” she shrugs. “Nonsense, follow me princess your chariot awaits” Eddie grins offering out his arm. (Y/n) now with a much bigger smile happily accepts following him into the parking lot.

It wasn’t until 6 and half weeks later that Eddie has confirmation that his plan was successful. They were in the middle of first period doing another partner project when all of a sudden (y/n) stopped an explanation short taking off out of the classroom. Both worry and hope fill Eddie’s chest. Somehow he manages to contain himself for about five minutes before getting permission to leave for the bathroom so he can check on her.

As Eddie steps into the girls bathroom he hears the toilet flush followed by broken sobs. He doesn’t say anything as he makes his way over to the stall but he’s sure the chain attached to his pants alerted her of his presence since it sounds like she’s trying to conceal her cries.“Sweetheart it’s me are you alright?” He asks softly tapping against the door. “E-Eddie?” She calls with her voice cracking. “Yeah you rushed out of class pretty quickly so I came to check on you, can I come in?” He asks.

She didn’t answer but Eddie hears the door unlock so he lightly pushed it open. (Y/n) was sat with her knees against the cracking tile floor. Cheer skirt crumpled, hair disheveled, eyes red and puffy, tears streaking down her cheeks. “Oh Eddie my life is over it’s ruined” she chokes out. Eddie sits down next to her on the floor stretching his legs out ahead of him.

“Why do you say that?” He asks voice soft and gentle. Her lip trembles and she has to look away from his gaze. “Because it is, everything is ruined! Everything I’ve worked for is ruined! Cheerleading, school, my friends, everything!” She shouts.

The sobs start fresh again, her eyes squeeze shut in a poor attempt of keeping the tears locked away. (Y/n)’s shoulders shakes and she can hardly breathe between her cries. “C’mere sweetheart” he offers pulling her into his lap carefully. He allows her to do most of the moving and she does leaning into his touch. She turns her head to fall in between his shoulder and neck.

Eddie holds her close, his right hand rests against her back while the other caresses the back of her head. (Y/n)’s hand clutches into his shirt balling the white fabric up in her first. He doesn’t mind the wrinkling shirt or the tears falling onto his skin. “It’s okay let it out I’ve goch ya” he whispers.

Once she’s calmed down her breathing steady and the tears have temporarily stopped she pulls away from the safety of his shoulder. Eddie’s left hand moves from her head to her face and he uses his knuckle to wipe away her tears. “What’s goin on pretty girl?” He asks pushing back a stray hair stuck to her face. “I’m pregnant” she answers almost in a whisper. Thankfully Eddie manages to to bite back a triumphant smile, for once in his usually miserable existence things are working out for him.

“Oh shit that’s big” he breathes. “What am I gonna do Eds” she asks with a sniffle. “Do you uh do you wanna keep it?” He answers her question with another question. ‘Please say yes, please say yes, please please please say yes’ he begs in his head. He’s worked too hard for this.

She swallows thickly nodding her head. “I do yeah I know that’s crazy and stupid-” she starts to answer. “Hey you are not stupid this is a really tough decision but it’s your decision” he answers confidently. She smiles, it’s weak and her eyes are still shiny with tears but it’s there.

“Who’s the father if you don’t mind me asking?” He asks. She sniffles and another tear spills from her eyes. “I don’t know.” The answer is quiet and shameful embarrassed even. “What do you mean?” He continues eyebrows furrowed “Remember how you found me at the party?”

“Are you saying you think someone…?” His sentence trails off like he’s unable to say the word even though he knows the answer. She nods and sobs again. Eddie pulls her back to his chest hushing her and rubbing her arm in comfort. “Fuck I’m so sorry sweetheart, I don’t even know what to say but I’m sorry” he says.

“It’s not your fault” she mumbles pulling away from his chest. “Maybe if I had gotten there sooner this wouldn’t have happened” Eddie frowns guiltily. (Y/n) shakes her head quickly grabbing his hand.“Don’t do that Eddie it’s not your fault. You did so much for me that night and it’s not even your responsibility to take care of me” she assures him.

“I like taking care of you whether it’s my responsibility or not” Eddie promised her. There’s a beat of silence between them and he wishes he could get a photo of the way she’s looking at him right now.

“I don’t know what to do. How am even supposed to tell people?”

“You could tell them the truth”

“No one would believe and I can’t prove anything I don’t even know who did it”

She’s looking away from him staring at her hands in her lap. This is Eddie’s chance he has to do this right otherwise it was all for nothing. “Okay well what if you tell people it’s mine?” He asks. (Y/n)’s head snaps up and her eyes are wider than he’s ever seen them. “Excuse me?” She gawks.

“Well people are already gossiping about us hanging out recently so we’ll just pretend it’s mine, we got drunk at the party and you ended up pregnant” he shrugs like it’s the obvious solution. Like he just added two and two and got five and she was the crazy one for not getting the same. “Eddie that’s insane it would completely derail your life” she argues. Eddie let’s out a snort at her comment. “Sweetheart I’m a super senior who lives in a trailer with his uncle and plays DND and guitar in his free time you’re not derailing anything.”

She seems to search his face for any clue he’s lying or joking. “Why on earth would you do something like that?” She asks genuinely. Eddie smiles at her charming, sweet, loving, innocent.“I uh I care about you (y/n). I’m serious about this but I understand if you don’t want people thinking it’s the freak’s baby either.”

Her hand comes up to cup his face delicately. From the look she’s giving him Eddie knows he’s got her hook line and sinker. “Eddie honey I don’t care if people think it’s yours but won’t you? I mean you have enough issues with people here do you really want to be associated with this too?” She’s practically acting like he’s sacrificing himself for her.

“Y’know I don’t think people thinking I not only slept with the most beautiful girl in town, but got her pregnant would be the worst thing for my reputation” Eddie teases. This earns a small wet laugh from (y/n). “I can’t believe you would do that for me Eds” (y/n) says softly. “I told you I care about you I want to do this, let me do this for you” he whispers. Their faces are mere inches apart he can feel her breath against his lips.

Now or never Eddie takes the risk leaning forward. She doesn’t stop him so he pressed his lips against her own. By book definition it’s probably not technically a perfect kiss. He can taste the salty tears on her lips and they’re sitting on a dirty bathroom floor. But the smile on her face when they pull apart makes it all worth it.

“I’m all in here sweetheart I don’t just mean some guy for you to point at when people ask who knocked you up. Diaper changing, late feedings, baths, all that dad shit. We’ll be a family alright? Together you, me, and this baby we’ll be in this together. This is what I want, you are what I want both of you” Eddie insists.

“You’re my hero you know that right?” She gushes smiling sweetly. “Anything for you princess” he smiles. She’s the one who connects their lips this time hurriedly kissing him. “Now let’s get you off the floor yeah? Can’t have my girl and my baby sitting on the dirty ground can we” he teases.

Eddie lifts her up allowing them both to stand and helps her straighten her cheer skirt. He grabs her bag from the floor tossing it over his shoulder. “Wanna ditch last period? I don’t think I can handle another class today” (y/n) asks. “Now you’re speakin my language, how’s a date to Benny’s sound?” Eddie suggests.

“Sounds amazing I love their milkshakes!” (Y/n) exclaims excitedly. Of course he already knew that along with which one’s her favorite. Eddie grins a content Cheshire grin offering his arm out for to hold onto as they make their way out of the school.

[arc-misadventures]

Secrets Well Kept

Jaune was having a bog-standard day until the moment his day was flipped on its head.

Literally.

Right now he was suspended in the air by his leg hanging over the roof of a building situated away from prying eyes.

He was surprised how quickly he got up here, how a single thread was holding him suspended in the air, but more importantly, that he didn’t throw up his guts in the process of getting here.

But, considering he was hanging upside down he suspected that there was still a possibility of that happening.

Peachy.

Fortuitously he wouldn’t have to worry about that for long. Hopefully.

For his captor have finally revealed themselves before him, and he only had one thing to say to them.

Jaune: If you dare say, “How’s it Yanging?” I will deliberately throw up on you.

: You wouldn’t dare!

Jaune: Unless it is by the form of a vile semi-non-lethal case of projectile vomit, how else could I, a common human possibly harm you, Spidergal.

Spidergal, the wisecracking web-slinger that swung around the city, saving people from a variety of things: Criminals committing crimes, cars speeding out of control, an introductory lesson of the ramifications of underestimating gravity. She will come in, and save everyone, be they petty criminals, or crazy men in monster suits. There were too many of those weirdos around town lately.

Jaune: Or… should I perhaps say… Yang Xiao Long…?

Spidergal stared at him for a moment before pulling off her mask, revealing a mane of golden hair, vibrant amethyst eyes, and a face that vibrated with fear.

Yang: Why?! Why did you do that?!

Jaune: Seemed pretty simple really; Your name is, Yang. I’m hanging from a… Crane? Yang, hang: Yanging. Seemed pretty simple considering you like towards making cheap puns.

Yang: it’s good I’ll give you that! But, why?!

Jaune: Why?

Yang: Yes: WHY?

Jaune: Why what?

Yang: Why didn’t you tell anyone that I was, Spidergal?!

Jaune: Are you talking about that time I caught you changing into your spider suit, and I caught you in that tantalizing lacy violet underwear?

Yang: Yes tha…?! Wait, you peaked?!

Jaune: To be fair, I couldn’t help it. You were changing your outfit at the time, and I just happened to walk on you in the process.

Yang: …

Yang: That’s fair… But, why didn’t you tell anyone?!

Jaune: Yes, I’m going to tell everyone I found out, Spidergal’s secret identity because I caught her in her underwear whilst changing into her suit. Who the devil would believe that, that could possibly happen?

Yang: Well… uhhh…? Honestly I wouldn’t believe that either.

Jaune: Precisely! Besides, I try to be a gentleman; I would have legged it out of there if it wasn’t for the fact that your friends… What are their names… Weiss, and… Blake?

Yang: Yes, their names are, Weiss, and Blake.

Jaune: Yeah, they could have caught you in that compromising position. Short of confessing you were, Spidergal, or a nudist how could you have gotten out of that?!

Yang: Definitely not the nudist route…

Jaune: Not to mention that squid guy…

Yang: Dr. Oc!

Jaune: Lame. Anyway he was on a rampage, so you had more pressing matters to attend to.

Yang: But… T-That was a month ago! Why haven’t you done anything?!

Jaune: Anything? What do you mean by that?

Yang: you could have blackmailed me into doing stuff for you, or you’ll reveal my identity! Like stealing stuff for you, o-or… m-making me doing something lewd…

As, Jaune lazily hung from the air he shot her an infuriated look that shocked her as she gazed upon a face that screamed offence.

Jaune: I’m tempted to tell everyone now for how insulted I feel that you would dare think that I would do something like that!

Yang: I’m sorry! It’s just… you know… secret identity that she has to keep secret… smoking hot babe… teenage boy…

Jaune: Get your head out of whatever gutter its in lady!

Yang: Okay! Just, why haven’t you told anyone about this, hell why didn’t you come to me about knowing this?! I’ve been on edge all month thinking you were planning something?!

Jaune: Hmm… That’s a fair concern. Well, I’ll tell you precisely what I was planning! But, first, I require a favour…

Yang recoiled in fear, her nerves were on edge as she saw the loopy smile across his face. She didn’t think he was planning anything sinister, but she couldn’t risk it.

Yang: What favour…

Jaune: Get me down from here! The blood is rushing to my head, and I think the projectile vomit is more of a warning, not a threat now!

Yang: Oh shit, yeah, sorry!

Yang quickly brought him down where, Jaune promptly laid on his back as he let his blood settle. After a few minutes he stood up, shaking the dizziness away.

Yang: You better?

Jaune: Somewhat? Imma gonna need to lie down for a while… that is so uncomfortable…

Yang: You can get used to it.

Jaune: Yeah, but I’m not… whatever it is you now are.

Yang: Hey!

Jaune: Okay… What I was planning to do was this: Nothing.

Yang: Nothing; you weren’t planning on doing anything?

Jaune: Not a gods dammed thing.

Yang: S-Seriously?

Jaune: Yep, I wasn’t planning on doing anything. You’ve been a great help to this city, it needs people like you, honest to god hero. I didn’t want to mess that up for internet clout. I mean, image how many people will be impacted if they knew you were, Spidergal. I mean… How many people could be hurt if your secret got out. And, I don’t just mean your family, but your friends, and any random schmuck on the street. Me telling who you are puts so many people at risk. I couldn’t dare dream of doing such a thing. So, don’t worry, your secret is safe with me.

Yang: Oh… T-Thank you…

Yang fidgeted with her hair nervously as she looked away with a faint blush on her face. She did this because she thought the heroing was cool, and the overall right thing to do. But, to hear someone thank her for doing what she did, seeing that her being a superhero, and doing the things she does, and for who she does it for was more important than knowing who she was, meant the world to her, and really gave her that boost of confidence she needed.

Jaune: So don’t worry about it, Yang. I’ve kept this a secret for over a year now, I can keep it secret still for years yet to come.

Yang: Thanks, Jaune, I really…?! Wait… ‘Over a year now…?’ Hold up! You’ve know I was, Spidergal for over a year now?!

Jaune: Yep!

Yang: How?!

Jaune: Remember when we first met?

Yang: Uhh… We met in the hallway at school… you were helping me by putting a textbook back into my backpack?! You saw my suit when you were putting that book back?!

Jaune: Close, I saw your suit in your backpack before I put that textbook back in. Why do you think I zipped up your backpack when I put the textbook back, and gave you that warning about letting stuff fall out?

Yang: You’ve known the whole time that I was, Spidergal since our freshmen year?!

Jaune: You weren’t really famous for a while yet, but yeah, pretty much.

Yang: H-Have you been protecting my secret the whole time as well?!

Jaune: More, or less.

Yang: Oh… okay…

Jaune: So… now what?

Yang: I don’t know… You know my secret, and have been keeping my secret for over a year now… I guess we just carry on as we are?

Jaune: I can do that.

Yang: Do you… Would you mind if I came to you… To talk about all these things I’ve been through? I don’t have anyone to talk about this to, and I could really use someone to talk to… do you… Would you mind?

Jaune look at her before walking over to a vent box on the roof. The metallic box echoed as he sat upon it, he turned to her, and tapped a spot besides him. Yang smiled at him before jumping, and summersaulting in the air, and landing gracefully next to him.

Jaune: So… Lets start at the beginning shall we?

Yang: How I became, Spidergal? That’s a good place to start.

Jaune: Oh, I was going to ask how you hide all that hair under that mask of yours; like seriously, how?!

Yang laughed as she lightly punched his arm before she told him the origin story of the, Astonishing Spidergal.

And, Jaune had to admit, it was too ridiculous to be true. But, such is life: Too ridiculous to be true.

///

Ahh, finally get to play out that Spiderman idea I’ve had stuck in my head for months now!

That was fun. Well, back to the grinding stone.

Do enjoy~!

[lovingdabeessss]

The part of the confession that’s like “you didn’t really like me at first” thing where they pretend they were at all enemies to lovers (they had one (1) awkward moment)

always reminds me of how i always did kinda wish they had a bit of a slower start to really being comfortable around each other (still having that instant chemistry tho)

just cause Blake thinks everything’s some sort of manipulation tactic (because of Adam) and Yang is just being what she believes isn’t even nice just normal

Like Yang notices Blake doesn’t have breakfast so she goes out of her way to get her a fruit or something while she’s already getting something for herself maybe gets Blake tea when she’s getting coffee

Not cause she’s feeling particularly kind that’s just what she thinks is normal to do for someone

And Blake thinks she’s trying to get something from her cause why else would she be doing DAILY unasked tasks for her???? That’s crazy?? It’s even the tea she likes!!! That stalker!! (she just paid attention to her favorite tea)

And Yang is just so confused about why this girl is acting so weird?? Like why wouldn’t Yang do these things?? Does she expect her to be inconsiderate?? Is she MAD that she’s doing the bare minimum (it’s a bit more) for her?? Why does she assume yangs the kind of person to manipulate people?? That’s so insulting (it’s a trauma response Yang leave her alone)

And Blake speaks against it but continues to drink it and eat the orange so Yang keeps doing it cause why not

I love the idea of them before they start actually getting any identifiable feelings for each other

Like Yang being nice just cause that’s who she is and Blake being confused and even then it feels super natural to hang out and be around each other so even if they confuse each so they just spend all their time together till they’re comfortable

[rachetmath]

Why RWBY Ain't MC?

(Okay if you already seen this ('Jaune More MC Ruby? 'https://rachetmath.tumblr.com/post/744057722669039616/jaune-more-mc-ruby) Then you should know where this is going.)

Jaune: And that's what is wrong with your characters.

RWBY: *shocked* 

Ruby: Oh crap.

Weiss: Oh God…

Blake: My people…

Yang: I am a basic bitch?

Jaune: Yeah you girl's characters are all over the place. Not just that… you have so much screen time yet do nothing with it. You're basically side characters to your own stories. 

Yang: Not true.

Jaune: Yes true. Look let's start with Ruby.

Ruby: Me?

Jaune: Yeah, because some of my character issues should have been yours, like killing Penny for example. Considering that was suitable punishment for what you have done. You lied to James. You drove him off the rails. You and your team made the mess. 

Ruby: Um…

Jaune: But that's too easy. Let's really go down the shit hole. Ruby, you have silver eyes. Yet you barely use them. You never trained with them. We still know nothing about them. And we don’t know if they’ll work on Salem.

Ruby: um…

Jaune: And you know that would have been answered back at Atlas if you went on the battlefield. Speaking of Salem, why the hell would you put Ironwood someone more of my problem than Salem, if I recall knows who your mom is.

Ruby: Well I had to protect Penny.

Jaune: Mhmm. Okay. Speaking of your mom what did you learn about her in The Ever After?

Ruby: Um-

Jaune: Not much. Yeah. And again no villain besides Cinder and Neo were interested in you. Not even you are interested in them considering you barely remember them. Like Ruby, you don't do anything. Like you fast but slow in the head. Hell even Neo ganging up on you, you still didn't deserve it. I actually deserved it.

Ruby: How?

Jaune: Again Pyrrha died. Ozpin died. All because of me. And even if you killed Penny it's still going to feel like my fault because I could've prevented it.

Ruby: Oh no. 

Weiss: Jaune-

Jaune: Nope. Your turn. You are worse than your father.

Weiss: I-

Jaune: You talk about how your father does business but you don’t do business. Nor do you know how to run a business.

Weiss: I mean-

Jaune: You lied to your sister’s face. Your sister who trained you and made sure you were able to leave Atlas. You got Klien fired. You threatened your own brother.

Weiss: Um-. I-i

Jaune: Oh let’s not forget how you destroyed your home and now your family is broke.

Weiss: Well at least I’m a good teammate.

Jaune: Didn’t you almost divide your team about two times? Also, how is everyone insulting me when you barely win your fights?

Weiss: Not true.

Jaune: Flynt Coal.

Weiss: Luck.

Jaune: Vernal.

Weiss: I was rusty.

Jaune: More like spamming.

Weiss: We defeated the Ace-ops.

Jaune: Neo and Cinder. The ones who were supposed to be on the same level as them. Did you win?

Weiss: Shit.

Jaune: You know what I should mention this. In Argus, I must have been under some stress or high as a kite, because now that I think about it, the deal Cordoven gave us, wasn’t that bad.

Weiss: Jaune she was planning to send me back to my father.

Jaune: Alright, then instead of accepting those terms and going to face your father, basically lying claim to your life, you cowardly avoided him and let your friends be what scares him. Not you. In fact, you were willing to endanger yourself and thousands of people to avoid him.

Weiss: … … ….

Jaune: Look I understand you don’t have to face everything alone. But there are some moments you have to deal with alone. Instead of having to escape your father like last time, you could have returned, stood up to him, and left out the front door from which you came in. Why? Because that’s how much you care about your friends and your freedom that you won’t let anybody, especially a man you can easily crush into ground beef take from you.

Weiss: By god. I am my father. 

Jaune: Yeah. Blake.

Blake: *looks at him*

Jaune: Blake, I would be concerned for my people if I were you.

Blake: Why?

Jaune: Well-

Me: Nope. Nope. I’ll explain. Blake, you remember the hound right?

Blake: Yeah.

Blake: A silver-eyed person.

Me: Look at his head.

Blake: “Look at his head”? I mean I see- oh. Oh my god.

Me: Yeah. A faunus. People who have animal-like features.  Again with silver eyes, we know nothing. But Faunuses on the other hand, we know where this could lead to.

Blake: Oh no.

Me: And you single-handedly divided the White Fang. And if hunters or people start siding with Salem, what does that mean for the Faunuses who are now venerable because of you?

Blake: Oh GOD! What have I done?!

Me: I mean I started questioning whether you cared about your people or not. Considering you didn’t bother staying in Mantle to protect them. You trust a criminal more than an official officer or hunter. Even though Robyn was doing the same crap Adam and Roman were doing. Good job.

Blake: *crying*

Me: Now for you.

Yang: Me?

Me: Yes. I never thought I come back for your ass. But here we are. Now then, what the fuck did Raven tell you to do?

Yang: Um.

Me: The same thing your father was telling you to do. Think. Don’t just follow orders. Don’t just act. Think! 

Yang: I did but-

Me: You didn’t think it through.

Yang: Look trusting Robyn-

Me: When you confronted Robyn what was your plan afterwards?

Yang: Um-

Me: Remember you didn’t tell her everything so she was still skeptical. She was tearing James a new one. So what was the point?!

Yang: Um-

Me: I mean, how were you going to chop Ruby off when ultimately you are more at fault than she is?

Yang: Um.

Me: Like at least Ruby was trying to lower the tension. You as per-fucking-usual added way more fuel to an already heated fire.

Yang: Well-

Me: I already mentioned how you are the biggest hypocrite, a simp and horrible sister. Now I might as well say you are the weakest link in your team– no, your squad.  

Yang: Hey-

Me: You've been losing fights.

Yang: Name-

Me: Mercury.

Yang: I beat him.

Jaune: Wasn’t that part of the plan to set you up though?

Yang: Yeah but-

Me: Round two, what happened then?

Yang: They double-teamed me.

Me: Before that you couldn’t land hit on him.

Yang: … … Adam.

Me: 2 v 1. He wasn’t even at his best. Bro was in his feelings.

Yang: The Ace-ops-

Me: Marrow, for one, could’ve ended that fight before it started. Second weren’t they arguing half the battle? Also didn’t Elm have your partner and for “reasons” she decided to let Blake go? Selling the match.

Yang: A win is a win.

Me: Okay Salem. Did you stand your ground and fight?

Yang: Um. Tactical retreat?

Me: She wasn’t even putting in effort. The cat.

Yang: I mean-

Me: Kilgore.

Yang: He does not count.

Me: Neo and Cinder. Again, on Ace-op level.

Yang: Come on, man, she-

Me: A win is a win right? So if you get a ring out or fall that is not victory. Neo won. Two to Zero.

Yang: … … …

Me: Raven… Raven trusted the lamp to you. Not Ruby. You! And you just… you just lost it like that. You fumbled- you fumbled so bad. And what’s crazy is I mentioned how you searched for the deadbeat instead of your “real mom” but it seems Raven is a better mom than Summer now. How? Not only is she alive. She knows what happened to Summer. And she saved your ass so many times. Three times.

Yang: Not-

Me: The train. Your first defeat.

Yang: … ….

Me: I’m not going to count Adam. But she let you leave her tribe camp alive, with your friend no less, knowing full well she didn’t have to help you especially when you came to her and was ready to fight when she wouldn’t give you what you wanted.

Yang: …. …. 

Me: And she let you walk with the relic. She could’ve killed you two times. But she didn’t. Why? Because whether she likes it or not, you are her DAUGHTER! And she LOVES you! 

Yang: Um…

Me: I hope- I hope Raven puts her hands on you because you earned the most savage ass whipping alive.  You basic bitch.

Yang: *shocked*

Me: Anyways y'all had plenty of opportunities to make your characters good. You all were given a good amount of screen time, however, the writers don't allow you to face your problems, shield you from consequences, and try so hard to prove you are always in the right all the time that you all might as well be Mary Sue. The worst kind of Mary Sue. The do no wrong type of Mary Sue.

Jaune: Damn. 

Me: Jaune, bro, I hope you survive this cause I still stand by this the writers did you dirty man. You didn't deserve that man. You didn't- you didn't deserve that. You and your team deserve better. 

[howlingday]

The Bad End Delusion

Opzin walked at a quick pace into the hospital.

Ozpin: Excuse me Ma'am. I am the Headmaster of Beacon Ozpin and I would like to check in on two my students here. A Jaune Arc and Nora Valkyrie.

Nurse: That way and look for room 320.

Ozpin quickly moved that way as he heard the nurse mutter those poor kids. As he found the room he knocked on the door then slowly opened it.

Ozpin: Hello? Mr.Arc, Ms.Valkyrie it's Ozpin do you mind if I come in and talk?

Nora: .....................

Jaune: ...You can come in.

As he enters the room he sees a heavily bandaged Jaune and Nora in the bright white hospital room. He's smells the dry blood and cleaners in the air.

Nora is just staring at the wall. What he can see of her face it seems she being crying for a long time and simply had no more tears. Curled up in a ball with her knees to her face.

Jaune's expression is one of anger, grief, and hopelessness. He is sitting up looking Ozpin in the eyes.

Jaune: Hello sir. I'm sure you have questions.

Ozpin: I do but those can wait for a bett-

Jaune: No. You need to know.

Ozpin: Alright tell me how a mission to check up on an old factory building in Vale went so wrong.

Jaune: Their was a Grimm like I never seen. One nome of us had ever even heard of. Even Weiss... Weiss. *deep breathe sounding like he's holding back a sob* Sorry.

Ozpin: Take your time Mr.Arc

Jaune: So we enter the building with me and Ruby deciding it be better with we stuck together. As we walked into the first couple rooms everything was fine but as we entered the factory line their was a mist. A red mist. That damn red mist. It was light at first and we didn't even notice at first. Everyone was getting kinda of droopy. We all thought it was because it was a long day.

Jaune: Then I heard something that sounded like my nephew crying. I looked around and as soon as I was about to ask the others if they could hear ot the lights went out.

Jaune: We all circled together to not let anything attack us. But it was dark and the mist made it hard to hear and think right.

Jaune: The monster quickly attacked knocking most of our weapons away while scattering our group. I think only Pyrrha and Yang still had theirs.

Jaune: I managed to hold on to Nora's hand to stick together. The mist just thickened and we tried to cover our mouths when we heard Ren scream in pain. We rushed in his direction but..

Jaune:...

Ozpin: Mr.Arc we can do this another time.

Jaune: .... He had no head and his legs had been torn off. We could have only been a few minutes away. How did it kill him so fast. He was one of the best fighter I ever knew.

Ozpin: ...

Jaune: We found are friends one by one by following their screams and angry shouts. Weiss was impaled in the chest by Pyrrha's spear. Yang arms were missing and with all the blood around her clearly bled out. Blake had a giant hold in her chest liek she was punched with imhuman force. Pyrrha... all we saw was her upper torso, head, and an arm.

Jaune: As we tried to process suddenly the gas was so thick it was hard to breathe then I saw all the bodies standing near us screaming if I was a real hero I should have done something with the voices of my family insulting me playing over.

Jaune: I couldn't tell what was real anymore. Then suddenly it attacked restlessly. Clawing,swinging, amd throwing us around like dolls. It seemed to change size constantly to avoid are hits. Nora's Aura broke first and I managed to hit it with a broken pipe before being throw into a wall.

Jaune: Last thong I remember was it's slow walk towards me spitting out gas while everyone expect Nora watched and laughed. They laughed and laughed and laughed until it felt like they were yelling in my head. Before it could finish me the wall exploded with team Cfvy quickly attacking amd driving ot away while they seemed to be wearing gas mask.

Jaune: I never saw Ruby.

Nora: I heard it say "With this Gemstone may Salem forgive me" while carrying Ruby away. She was still breathing as it ran.

Nora:.... Are they gone? Really gone?

Ozpin did not answer leaving Nora and Jaune to start crying again.

Jaune: I don't think I'm able to be a huntsman anymore.

Ozpin: I will call your family and let you rest for now.

Ozpin closing the door still hearing their cries.

(OK so that was a lot and I'm probably misspelling a lot of stuff but yeah. Their is more of this story but I can't write because it's just not where my skills lay. If you want to help that be cool but I'm not gonna bug you about it. So in this after Jaune and Nora heal they leave beacon and move out to live with Jaune's family one day getting married and having kids of their own one day.)

So thoughts? Criticism? Ideas? Want to hear it all? Want to know what happens next? Tell everything you thought of and how you would improve the Au idea.

First of all, great work! Really loved what you've put out there and I'd love to see more of this! Though that's gonna be hard since RWBY and JNPR are now dead, either literally or figuratively.

Second, I'm curious where, if anywhere this story goes. To be honest, it kinda feels like those Warhammer RWBY posts I made a while back, specifically the one where JNPR were killed by a Lichtor. I don't think you can really go further with so many characters dead like this, but hey, I've seen more impossible scenarios get resolved.

Last, the way I would improve this AU idea would be to give a follow-up to after this. I mean, sure, Team RWBY is dead with their leader abducted and Team JNPR have been broken beyond repair. I would follow this scenario up with Ruby being taken back to Salem (either she dies, gets corrupted, or escapes) and show us the interaction between Delusion and Salem. Either that or have Beacon respond to this attack by sending the best huntsmen and huntresses out to rescue Ruby, hopefully before it's too late. Third option is showing the impact all these deaths had on people throughout Remnant; parents and friends all reacting to the news that RWBY and JNPR are dead.

Until then...

KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!

[novankenn]

Questions… and an insult?

Ilia finally noticed Blake’s struggles to free herself, so she with a blush released her former crush.

Blake: So Weiss and Jaune?

Ilia: Maybe?

Blake: When? Why?

Ilia: Today… like forty minutes ago, and I’m not sure.

Blake: Not sure?

Ilia: How do I know it’s not just me being swayed by their physical attribute?

Blake: Okay. Okay. This is a lot to come to terms with. But why come to me?

Ilia: Who else is there, who had a similar… issue?

Blake: What’s that supposed to mean? I’m with Yang.

Ilia: You were also with Adam.

Blake: (Aggressive Growl)

(Master List)