#that's my favorite head disciple

[frummpets]

“Stop dragging your feet,” Ming Fan hisses in an almost whisper, hand between Shen Yuan’s shoulders as he practically pushes him forward, steps hurried, “we will never get this done otherwise.” “I wasn’t,” he protests and tries to twist to look behind them, “stop pushing me!” “Stop squirming! Ugh, you’re such a child,” Ming Fan complains and then yanks him down another path, this one seeming to loop back to the main street. Fuck! No, not back to the damn crowd! “This is why Shizun wouldn’t accompany us, he knew how bothersome it would be!” “I’ll bite you,” Shen Yuan threatens.  The hand between his shoulders drops. “You could try,” Ming Fan says and finally Shen Yuan can turn around.

i cheer whenever ming fan appears!!! he's more than a little rough around the edges art, but he's trying his best :>

even more Shen Yuan of No Relation by @grubus!! each crumb of ming fan is what fuels me from week to week

ming fan design by @berriecherry !!

✦ TWITTER VERSION

[k-l-ng]

Non-existent SVSSS Fanfic's summary N°1

Title : "Finding home"

(Any possible future addition to this AU will be found under the "finding home" tag)

Relationship : Ming Fan & Shen Jiu,

Shen Jiu & Shang Qinghua,

Shang Qinghua & Ming Fan,

Shen Jiu & Yue Qingyuan

Reincarnation, Hurt/Comfort, HE

In the modern world, some teachers and students of the Cang Qiong Middle School wake up with vague memories of a past life practicing cultivation. They recognize each other and start living in harmony, painting a heartwarming reunion.

Those who remain miserable are the same.

Ming Fan is glad to have his Shizun back. He knows that, this time too, Shizun will save him from a lifetime of abuse at the hands of his own parents. Shizun is busy now, but he’ll come very soon; he just has to endure a little bit. 

Shizun loves Luo Binghe, so of course, he’ll help his future husband first. He understands that Ning Yingying is also in a precarious situation, so it's natural that Shizun wants to help his other favorite disciple. 

So he waits, and waits. And waits.

Most of the staff seem to like each other better overnight. Only teacher Feng is still cold towards everyone, but it just seems like his default state, and he doesn’t share a past with his colleague. Besides teacher Yue and very tentatively, teacher Shang, no one tries to strike a friendship with him. Yet Ming Fan can’t help feeling drawn to him, and ultimately manages to find a savior in the man.

---

Feng Jiu, unlike his ex-fellow cultivators, has been reincarnated with another surname. He remembers his previous life as a Peak Lord ending abruptly because of a Qi deviation, remembers the impostor taking his body to make a fool of himself, remembers all the love he never got being poured on his replacement; remembers being forgotten, unmourned. Except, surprisingly, by the little rat-shidi, and, maybe unsurprisingly, by his head disciple.

A disciple who, while not knowing he’d died, mourned the side of "Shen Qingqiu" that had disappeared in the blink of an eye. A foolish disciple who'd seemed to partially understand his bitterness at the world -he probably did, considering-, and who, despite Shen Jiu's obvious distaste towards male disciples, still tried so desperately to gain his approval, his affection.

The foolish boy is now crouched on the sidewalk crying, pathetically trying to keep silent. Crying for a Shizun who's gone back home to his family with Luo Binghe for the holidays.

As his teacher, Feng Jiu thinks, he is much obligated to help anyway.

[wumiings]

AU where Shen Jiu takes one look at tiny prospective disciple Shen Yuan who looks so much like him but so fucking soft and immediately goes “I must destroy it” but when he tells Yue Qingyuan he wants the boy for Qing Jing Peak, YQY unexpectedly puts his foot down— reason being that he thinks the Shens must be long-lost brothers and he’s afraid that if SJ badly hurts SY and then finds out the truth he’ll regret it. So instead SY becomes a disciple of Qiong Ding Peak.

The thing is, though, that SY knows why YQY took him in. So even though he sees YQY as an older brother figure, he privately believes that the only reason the sect leader is affectionate towards him is that he’s (possibly) related to SJ. Meanwhile, YQY is going around the whole Twelve Peaks like “omg have you met my beloved new disciple?? he’s so cute and smart and he’ll probably inherit the sect some day.” SJ is immensely jealous and furious at himself for it.

Cut forward several years and SY is head disciple of Qiong Ding. SJ manages to corner him after a meeting of the peak lords and is harassing him about something or other until SY finally blindsides him by blurting out the “fact” that YQY still thinks they’re siblings and is really only soft on him for SJ’s sake…. SJ is so incredulous he nearly has a qi deviation.

Afterwards, he tries very hard not to let his feelings towards SY be affected by the most absurd bit of self deprecation he has heard in his entire life, but a week later he breaks and storms into YQY’s study like “ZHANGMEN-SHIXIONG ARE YOU AWARE THAT YOUR PRECIOUS FAVORITE DISCIPLE BELIEVES YOU DON’T ACTUALLY LIKE HIM???”

[sunderwight]

Imagining a scenario where Shen Qingqiu clocks some of the lingering tension between the peak lords and Luo Binghe after they get married, and so looks up what all the rights & privileges of a peak lord's spouse are (because really only the ascetic peak has restrictions against marriage), and then just like. Heaps them onto Binghe.

Fine robes and ornaments in Qing Jing's style. A title. Appropriate authority over Shen Qingqiu's disciples and junior sect siblings. Technically Binghe is also entitled to use of his own residence, and there's a building on the peak that is at least nominally reserved for the peak lord's wife, but it hasn't been used in a long time and Binghe would cry if Shen Qingqiu even suggested living in separate buildings (and Shen Qingqiu would also not like it but shhh). So he doesn't get that, exactly, but Shen Qingqiu does have the building freshened up and aired out as a place where Binghe can house guests from the demon realms, or potentially his own personal disciples (should he desire to take any on one day).

Binghe accompanies Shen Qingqiu to peak lord meetings in his capacity as husband, rather than disciple, which means Binghe also gets to sit at the table instead of standing behind Shen Qingqiu's seat.

But really just, Shen Qingqiu making a point of doing everything extremely officially to really drive home that he married Binghe, and he expects Binghe to be treated with respect and not suspicion or derision or any of the other bad habits that his fellow peak lords have displayed. Not just with Binghe, but also towards the original goods in the past (SJ might have been a piece of work, but the fact also remains that most of what his sect siblings thought of him was inaccurate). SQQ scraping up every bit of political acumen he can find from all the books he read and PIDW itself and his own history as the son of a wealthy family, and being like, "if I don't want Binghe to be bullied, I must make it clear that he has my favor!"

Meanwhile everyone already knows Luo Binghe is Shen Qingqiu's favorite, like man they know it so much already, more than they'd like to, but it's not like they can SAY anything because actually putting the right hair ornament onto Luo Binghe's head and making the disciples address him as Shimu is in fact more appropriate than all the other ways Shen Qingqiu displayed his favoritism so far. It's just driving several of the other peak lords slowly insane because it's backwards! The order of things is all messed up! Shen Qingqiu can't truly expect them to start respecting this disgraceful mess of a relationship now, can he?!

Of course he can. Also Yue Qingyuan is backing him up. (Yue Qingyuan actually finds this kind of amusing, because it's very on-brand for both versions of Shen Qingqiu to get embroiled in a controversial mess only to retroactively go "oh yeah, respectability politics are a thing" and then just try and brazenly bluff his way through it.)

Meanwhile Binghe is very much enjoying himself. Could he stop anyone in the sect from actually mistreating him in a heartbeat? Of course. He could kill any of them, they all know it, and Binghe is not unaware of how to leverage that kind of fear into compliance, if not respect. But then he'd have to go stalking around being tyrannical all the time, and he does that enough as the demon emperor.

It's far more enriching to let people be rude to him and then hang his head and "nobly endure" the mistreatment, just to watch Shen Qingqiu's eyes narrow and his fan snap shut before he lets out some cutting remark and then lavishes another sign of his favor onto Luo Binghe. Binghe's wildest teenage fantasies were made of this stuff! He's living the dream!

[snixkers]

Picture You

Pairing: Emily Prentiss × GN!Reader

For: requested by @suckerforcate to fill my body worship square for @cmkinkbingo2024

EXPLICIT CONTENT, SMUT

Content Warnings: Cunnilingus/fingering (emily receiving), pagan/hellenistic religious imagery that could be considered blasphemous, reader is simping hard, and I don't blame them, Emily is implied to be older

Summary: You feel the need to prove to Emily she's your one and only.

Author's Note: Ngl, this might be my favorite piece I've ever written. It's definitely less steamy, but I was feeling the wlw yearning HARD (And, as always, peep the Chappell Roan song)

Feedback is always welcome!

Requests are OPEN!

Your girlfriend was absolutely gorgeous. Sometimes, the hardest part of being with her was that she didn't see that herself. Emily was always relatively confident, but she didn't see just how beautiful she was.

Her raven hair, which was slowly starting to mix with sparse strands of silver, was perfect for running your hands through. Her onyx eyes were easy to get lost in, reflecting her wisdom and maturity. Everything about her, head to toe, was like she was made just for you.

And you planned to show her.

That's why she was currently flat on her back on your shared bed, legs and arms spread wide so you had easier access.

You started with her forehead, peppering her face with quick kisses that made her giggle before trailing down to her neck. She trailed off into a choked moan, looking down at you. You just smiled at her, tugging gently on her hair and urging her to close her eyes. Once she did as you asked, you moved down to the smooth expanse of her chest, kissing the valley between.

She was moaning fully now, and you could feel her getting antsy. You kneeled between her legs, not letting her relieve the pressure. You wanted to be the one giving her pleasure. Your fingers wandered after your mouth, sliding down to palm each breast.

Emily bit her lip, keeping her focus on your touch. Her hips shifted slightly, but you reassured her you'd be giving her what she needed shortly. You trailed the tip of your tongue down the center of her stomach, feeling the hidden muscles beneath.

The two of you fell into a comfortable silence, years of togetherness making the needs of her body second nature to you. You finally settled between her legs, licking a broad stripe up her folds and reveling hedonistically in her noises.

She knew what you wanted, for her to sit still and enjoy it, but she needed more. You obliged, spreading her slickness around and making her writhe needily. It was like an offering, and the sounds you managed to coax out of her were your rewards. This woman was like a goddess, and you were her willing disciple, tending to the temple of her body.

Emily spread her legs wider to give you better access, and you greedily lapped her up. Your hands found their way to the usual spots, one alternating between each nipple and lavishing them with attention while the other moved closer to her entrance.

She whined for more, and who were you, a mere mortal, to deny her what she wanted? You slid one finger into her waiting heat, which she rewarded with a sharp gasp. Your finger thrust with renewed vigor, determined to make her moan, make her come, make her feel the prayer you were reciting between her legs.

Your fingers worked in tandem with your tongue to bring her to climax, and the taste of her was ambrosia itself. Certainly, if she bled, ichor, not blood, would flow from the wound.

Slowly and reluctantly, you peeled away from your feast, hovering over her to take everything in. How in the world did someone like her walk the earth without a loyal band of followers, people willing to bend to her every whim?

But as she kissed you lovingly as your reward for your piety, you knew that it was worth doing the work millions should be as long as she was satisfied.

[allpiesforourown]

i am Thinking about the city that only allows married couples and on one hand i am obsessed with big beefy shizun dressing up as sy’s wife. i would, however, like to present the inverse for your consideration

binghe thinks about shen yuan dressed up as his pretty little wife and is immediately desperately extremely interested. (he needs to see it he needs to see it he needs to see it aaaaAAAA!!!!!)

he wraps sy in fine silks, and when sy says ‘really shizun, isn’t this a bit much just to sneak into a city?’ binghe shushes him and drapes more jewelry over him. if shen yuan is going to be his wife, he’s going to treat him like his wife. which also means he’s wearing a weimao, because nobody gets to see binghe’s wife’s face!! that’s *his* wife!!

ough or maybe he’d put sy in a mili to keep his whole body covered. it’s not practical but binghe is possessive of his wife—disciple. his disciple (yes these are all from different time periods but liu mingyan’s miansha isn’t even historically acurate so i am playing in the playground)

i lost track of my thoughts but i am simply picturing binghe peacocking through the street because his favorite disciple is dressed up all pretty and has his lovely face covered. people can only look in envy while binghe gets to see sy after he takes the veil off

and he may or may not leave once sy is asleep to jork it furiously bc fuck fuck fuck shen yuan is too pretty like this oh no oh shit oh fuck

sorry for babbling but not sorry for Picturing this in my terrible little head

COOK ANON, COOK!!

Binghe: a-yuan has to wear makeup!

Shen Yuan: but no one will see it under the veil so why-

Binghe grabbing shen yuans chin and putting rouge on his lips: don't think about it too hard, just do as your shizun says...

The clothes having very very subtle embroidery that resembles binghes hidden demon mark and Binghe's sooo happy to mark shen yuan all over..

Bonus points if after they return to the bamboo house, shen yuan changes out of the clothes and hands them back to binghe and says, "Shizun should return these to the tailor or regift them to a woman he fancies."

Binghe frowns and insists shen yuan keep them, but his disciple isn't having it... so binghe is left standing alone in his room holding the clothes and goes yeah I should get rid of these... I should..... and then he buries his face in the clothes and inhales shen yuans scent and decides he is never getting rid of these

[greentrickster]

Okay, so, been reading some good scumplane (OG!Shen Qingqiu/Airplane) lately, because in this house we support Airplane being loved by terrifying/terrifyingly hot men, but also, like... I do love Moshang just so so much as a ship.

And all this has awoken a mighty need in me.

A need for a Moshangjiu fic with scumplane getting established first and then bringing our favorite popsicle in on things.

Anyway, scenario! Shen Qingqiu starts noticing Shang Qinghua when they're disciples via the classic scenario of being smart enough to realize something is fishy about SQH being the only survivor of a demon attack, begins paying attention to his most anxious shidi, accidentally shows his most anxious shidi the simplest of Human Kindness, accidentally becomes shidi's favorite shixiong, accidentally becomes friends with shidi, accidentally catches feelings. Continues being a Sneaky Bastard in order to figure out what shidi is up to (and now also to confirm shidi is single).

Ah, shidi is entangled with an Ice Demon. This shixiong will make use of his scholarly peak's library to learn all and then decide to- wait. Wait, it's super violent by human standards, but is it- is this demon attempting to... court shidi?

...

Not if SQQ dates him first he's not!!!

There follows a whirlwind romance between SQQ and SQH where no one really knows what's going on, especially the two involved, it involves a lot of shit talking about everyone else in their lives, snacks, and accidental trauma bonding.

Also Airplane being Airplane and accidentally spilling that not only is he also kinda crushing (bad) on Mobei-jun, but also Mobei-jun's entire backstory and please, shixiong, I know it all looks bad but this shidi's house is literally the only place in the world it's completely safe for his king to sleep, everyone deserves to sleep without having to worry about their relatives murdering them for things that aren't their fault from time to time, right, shixiong???

Shen Qingqiu: ...goddammit, the demon's a fellow sad little meow meow. (only not in these exact words because he doesn't know these phrases, naturally)

In a wild, bold, and - dare I say it - shockingly sexy convolution of thought processes and ideas, SQQ manages to finagle SQH into letting him meet with MBJ (SQH nearly has a heart attack three times in the process but it's fine, it's cool, this is his life, this may as well happen, it's fine-).

SQQ: It has come to my attention that my shidi is spying for you on our sect.

MBJ: (glowering at SQH, who is cowering behind shixiong wondering how he got talked into all this)

SQQ: However it also appears that this is merely a cover story and the only thing you really do is use his room to nap. And also that you are quite fond of him.

SQH: (This is it, this is how I die. Again.)

MBJ: (...if I stare straight ahead and don't change my expression, no one will be able to tell that he's right)

SQQ: So anyway I think you should join Cang Qiong Mountain Sect.

MBJ: (gears grinding)

SQH: (squawking splutters of protest and confusion)

SQQ: (who speaks panicking!SQH at this point) Stop that, it's perfectly reasonable. He has the head disciple of our logistics peak under his thumb, it would be the simplest thing in the world for him to have you throw the sect into absolute chaos without even trying, then organize an attack, swoop in, and crush us all. He could have done it years ago, but he never has, he never even seems to initiate anything. I don't think he even cares about taking the Northern Throne, I think he's just incompetent about wanting to spend time with you. So he might as well just lie low until our shizuns ascend and then I'll take him on as a disciple on Qing Jing and you two can stop sneaking around like idiots.

MBJ: >8O

SQQ: Are you actually opposed?

MBJ: (folds arms and looks away sulkily, because like... it's true but you don't have to say it like that)

SQH: 8O ...reverse uno...

SQQ: What?

SQH: You're reverse unoing my blorbo!

SQQ: Quit making up word-

SQQ cannot continue because the System just presented the option to accept this potential new plot line (even if it does have the rather confusing title of 'Shidi Has Two Hands'), and holy shit, Mobei-jun seems to be potentially down for it, holy shit, apparently Mobei-jun actually likes me, holy shit, SQQ may have just solved all my problems-?!? This is great, this is fantastic, this is the best day of my life, this- is a long time I'm being allowed to be myself about all this, why is Shen shixiong not interrupting...?

Ah.

It is because I am kissing him full on the lips.

Cool cool cool.

At least I'm gonna die on a high note.

SQQ: O///O o_o (ahem) Shidi's- shidi's a really bad kisser.

SQH: Ah-haha, I can explain-

SQQ: We should work on that. Later.

SQH: (BEST DAY OF BOTH MY LIVES!!!)

MBJ: (I... did not actually hate watching that. Hm.)

Anyway, he agrees to the plan, SQQ and SQH start dating, some more time passes, the previous generation of peak lords ascend, the new generation take their places, and a week later Mobei-jun is an outer disciple of Qing Jing Peak.

The other peak lords are not amused, Qingqiu that is a demon, no.

SQQ: So what I'm hearing is that whole 'Cang Qiong will accept anyone from anywhere' philosophy was a lie then?

He's a demon!

SQQ: Children can't help where they're born. Now if you'll excuse me, I have classes to teach.

First lesson of the day is SQH and SQQ are a package deal, take it or leave it. Second lesson is no canoodling with Shang Shibo until you've finished with lessons and chores for the day. Third lesson is if you see any Bai Zhan disciples hassling our peak's disciples you can break their swords. Just snap 'em in half. Throw them off the peak. Don't kill them, but do make them cry.

SQH, meanwhile, has now seen MBJ in an outer disciple uniform and had a whole bunch of new awakenings on top of all the other things he already knew about himself.

And, in a twist of dramatic irony... Qing Jing's first disciple to ever have demonic heritage decides the dorms are a no-go after one night because, to him, they are broiling hot, how can anyone sleep in this heat, and chooses to go sleep in the wood shed instead.

[bunbotbuggiman]

au where the peak lords reincarnate as Bingge's quarter demon spawn

saw a post (https://www.tumblr.com/cursed-angelic-art/686056254886559744/do-you-think-mobei-jun-is-the-one-playing-father) talking abt if mbj "played dad" for og lbh's army of kids and-

au where the peak lords reincarnate as Bingge's quarter demon spawn

they all have different mothers but are all the same age- were born the same year-

even sqq, who's nyy's favorite kid (because he reminds her of her shizun, during the good days before lbh became a disciple) despite not being her kid (she herself never had any kids, which doesn't bother her as much because neither did lmy or shl and they're the head wives still so) (in the same vein, Liu Mingyans favorite kid is the one who behaves most like her late brother)

This world's version of Shen Yuan, however, was born as the son of one of mbj's advisors, before said advisor and his family died in a tragic accident. so he was adopted by mobei-jun and shang qinghua at the ripe old age of barely a few weeks old.

His name: Mo Yuan, named after an old friend of Shang Qinghua's from his secret pre-transmigration life (In this world, SY is not a transmigrator.... maybe he is a reincarnation.... but there's no real way to tell, he sure doesn't remember anything)

So he's an ice demon. looks like Shen Yuan but everything about him is like 30 shades more MBJ. he adores his parents, and his parents adore him, and because of this mutual adoration he has successfully grown up completely secure in his status as their child in spite of fully knowing of his adopted status.

This being said, there are very few individuals who also know this fact, because since the transition was so fast (and because Shang Qinghua knows stuff, and Mobei-Jun knows he knows stuff) they just bullshit it and say that Mo Yuan is a magical plant baby who was born as a full demon in spite of technically being a half demon because of magic plant bullshit.

He looks enough like shang qinghua to make it believable anyways, so it's fine.

Mo Yuan and Shang Qinghua also have a really weird relationship where MY at some point got into Shang Qinghua's writings (only the age appropriate stuff.... he found out about the porn at a later age) and violently hated it, but Shang Qinghua found it:

A. funny that his son was so violently opinionated and

B. thought it was important that his son be able to have an outlet for these emotions so he honestly encouraged it.

So now they have a really close parental relationship but also are kind of friendly-close because when Mo Yuan found some of SQH's writings, he immediately was like "oh my god Baba you suck???? at writing????? How?????? You are a scribe???? This is so awful???? Baba, you could do this better, and this better, and- what the hell, take this out, oh my god..."

Also, his name in the au is 漠垣 Mo Yuán meaning North[ern] Wall, but his courtesy name is 漠 雪峰 Mo Xuefēng, meaning North[ern] Snow[y] Peak.

However, he is beloved by much of the palace staffers, who have watched him grow up much closer than any of Luo Bingge's children, who mostly grow up in the relative isolation of their courtyards and palaces and palace wings, so he is referred to by many of them by his nickname, 雪花 Xuehua, meaning snowflake.

So anyways, he meets + kinda grows up alongside many of the peak lords because he grows up spending a lot of time in the palace by virtue of his dads being, well, Mobei Jun and Shang Qinghua.

Shang Qinghua and Liu Mingyan, shippers prime and book club buddies into this universe (though Mo Yuan staunchly ignores all of LMY's writings because his face is wayyy too thin for that) immediately sees the way that the various children of Luo Bingge climb over each other in desperate attempts to charm and woo the chilly Mo Xuefeng...

and maybe eventually, how one son of Luo Bingge looks at him and how Mo Yuan looks back.

(I haven't decided what I want the pairing to be here.... oopsies y'all, come to y'alls own conclusions ig lmaooo)

[yandere-romanticaa]

I'm not sure if it's okay, but can I request a second part for this precious Douma post you fed us with please ?

If you don't do second part to your post, no problem, anything for him will calm my hunger 🥲

Here it is, the heavily requested part 2 of this piece. Hope you enjoy it!

Barely a week has passed ever since the horrific encounter with Lord Douma.

You recalled someone saying that the stench of death is permanent, that it is something you can never forget once you get a whiff of it.

The smell of rot and decay haunted you both day and night. Sleep became a scarce luxury as you would lay awake in the dead of night, wondering just what other poor soul was Lord Douma going to devour next. It all clicked once you put two and two together, of course he was a demon. His strange reactions, twisted attitude and carefree smiles were nothing but a mask to cover up his true, carnivorous nature. Douma clearly had a preference for women for his meals as you noticed that most of the people who ran amok were women.

Were you next?

Despite him not turning around and even outright saying that he wasn't going to do anything, you simply did not trust him. Why should you? He was a demon, a very clever one at that, clearly. He managed to trick hundreds of people into blindly following him and submitting to his every single little whim. All he needed to do was just say the word and the entire community would execute you without a question - Lord Douma's word was absolute.

You didn't even want to think about the other much more grizzly possibility if he wanted a more hands on approach.

Due to the encounter that you had unfortunately witnessed, your work had started to hinder. You became sloppy and shaky, you couldn't even perform the most basics of tasks. Someone else was always forced to step in for you and others voiced their concern for you.

"Why aren't you with Lord Douma? You always pour his afternoon tea!"

"I thought Lord Douma wanted you close by for the ceremony?"

Many similar statements would ring in your ears on a daily basis that it made you want to bang your head against a wall a pull out every single little strand of hair. Just how blind and stupid were there people?! There was no way that you were the only one who knew what was really going on behind closed doors. To make your living nightmare even worse than it really was, on one fine and sunny morning one little boy came up to you. With a cheerful smile on his face he said:

"Lord Douma wishes to speak with you! Please meet him in his chambers as soon as possible!"

Each step that you took felt more and more agonizing then it should have been. You felt like someone had placed a giant pile of rocks on your chest and chained them there. What were you to do, oh God, what were you supposed to do? Do you play dumb or should you come clean? If you told him the truth he might appreciate your honesty and let you off the hook -

...That was nothing but wishful thinking. There was no point in trying to make sense of a demon.

You arrive to his chambers, the doors closed shut. With a heavy heart you knock and a cheerful "Come in!~" is heard from the other side.

You don't dare look at Lord Douma directly in the eye. You lower your head in fear but do your best to make it look like a sign of respect. He sits on his makeshift throne, chin resting on one hand as the other urges you forward to sit in front of him. With your knees sinking to the ground you feel him reaching out towards you, his fingers were playing with stray strands of your hair.

You still did not raise your gaze.

"(y/n) dear, I haven't seen you in so long! I missed my favorite disciple so much! Why are you ignoring me?!"

Who would have thought that this whiney brat in front of you was a man eating demon? He sounded like a little boy, like he hadn't seen his favorite toy in a long time, which was partially true in a way. You grit your teeth and try thinking of something proper to say but Douma beats you to it.

"Do not ignore me."

Icy chills take over your entire being. Since... Since when did Lord Douma sound like that? You clenched the fabric your kimono, knuckles turning white due to the pressure. Suddenly, a sharp thug forced you to look upward and were met with a rainbow gaze.

"You aren't ignoring me, right, (y/n)?"

You can do nothing but gently shake your head. With his gaze glued to you it was impossible to breathe let alone speak. Feeling the pressure behind your skull lighten your shoulders slump forward as Lord Douma brings you closer and locks you in his embrace.

He knows.

He knows that you saw him. Why else would he summon you like this? Feeling helpless you could do nothing but wrap your arms around the cult leader, returning his hug in full.

Ignorance really was bliss.

You finally understood the beauty of it.

[anachronismstellar]

May I suggest a lady beast peak lord (handles beasts of burden and livestock + whatever the fuck LQQ drags home that's still alive) for the achievement ?? Possibly with the name Wu Qingfang?

And here we are, welcome my friend to the possession of Airplane, we can't escape him and he can't stop mixing up his peak lords, apparently DUSHSKDJSKD

And the moment I've seen your ask I fell in love with her aaaaa a woman that takes no shit from all the other lords PLUS can handle Liu-shidi nonsense? HELL YESS HERE WE GO

BTW thank you for her lovely name! :D I hope you like her as much as I enjoyed writing this!

Another thanks to everyone in this post that helped me with the name for the Long-Leg Kicking Pouch Hare creature, you guys are amazing! ❤️

The peak name I've borrowed from @00janeblonde's fanfic FAQ that you can find here!

------

One curious thing that might pass unnoticed by many was the proximity of An Ding peak with Ling You peak. After all, there was no logistics without the transportation, and there was no transportation without animals to pull carriages.

There was also the feeding of the entire Sect. All the dairy, the eggs, and the meat were under Ling You peak responsibility, while the logistics to who sent what fell under An Ding scope.

So Shang Qinghua walking around Ling You peak was a pretty common sight, especially when he had to bring a gift or another when one of the An Ding disciples fucked up a delivery.

It was one of those days, apparently, because Wu Qingfang had barely set foot outside her private quarters when Shang Qinghua turned up on her path, a pile of paper in one hand, a basket on the other, the suspicious smell of honey filling the air, making her stomach grumble.

"What did you do?" she didn't hesitate to pass by him. She had spent the past night organizing a hunt to find a batch of goats that had escaped their sheds after a disciple with their head on the clouds had left the latch lose, she was not in the mood for more trouble.

"Can't a Shixiong visit his favorite Shimei?" he turned on his heels to follow her, making the pressure on Wu Qingfang's head get tighter. Whatever it was, it was bad for him to bring bribes so soon in their little game.

"Oh please," she sent him a glare over her shoulder. "Everyone knows your favorite is Mu Qingfang, don't play coy with me."

"Okay, yes, he is my favorite shidi, but you are my favorite shimei!" he insisted and with quick steps they were walking shoulder to shoulder, the basket filled with sweets being swigged back and forth in front of her. "Wu-shimei please, I swear is not that bad, I just need to send a carriage to Hua Hua palace-"

"Hua Hua- Why?!" The sound of her shoes scraping the ground was too loud for the soft morning, but she couldn't help to turn around and stare at him in surprise. A tripe long like that would take weeks to prepare! "What could you possibly want with those people?!"

And she hated that it kinda worked when he blinked his big brown eyes at her, pulling back the cloth covering the basket, the sweet scent of melon making her mouth water. She squinted her eyes at him, too stubborn to let him win so quickly. Especially when the last time Shang-Shixiong had pulled a stunt like that, she had lost three good horses.

"A little bird told me that they got their hands on a very rare flower, and I need it for Shen-Shixiong-"

"Oh I see how it is," she rolled her eyes, turning her back to him again to keep walking to her office. "You fucked up and now you want my help to get back on his good graces."

"Shimei, pleaseee," he whined, pouting so hard it was a miracle his lips didn't get stuck like that. "I miss our go games and I even don't know why he's so angry at me!"

She snorted in the most unlady manner, rolling her eyes. She knew damn well what he did, in fact the entire Sect did. Or better, who he did. But if Shang-Shixiong was going to play coy, she wasn't going to be the one to burst his bubble. And with a glint in her eyes she took a sharp turn to the left, away from the main building. He wanted to pull this nonsense on her? Fine. He might as well fight for it and help her take care of a very special animal first.

They arrived at the stables after a few minutes of walking and Shang-Shixiong whining about his very hard life. Wu Qingfang ignored it all, taking the papers and basket from his hands to shove an apron on his arms, feeling a little smug to see him fumble to not make it fall on the ground.

"I'll think about it, first you have to help me with her," she said as she pointed her thumb at the last stall where a huge form laid on its side. It was one of the few stalls that had iron bars all over, looking more like a cage.

"Uh." Shang Qinghua took a cautionary step back when he noticed the huge beast behind bars, a nervous chuckle escaping his throat. "What- what is that?"

The that in question had the form of a huge hare, the size of at least two tall men when standing on its feet. It could run on his lower legs and use its upper paws to punch and attack. It was a ferocious thing with poisonous fangs and claws, with a thick fur that shined brown during spring and pure white during winter.

It was one of the most beautiful beasts Wu Qingfang had ever seen, and she wished she could hug it until it made noise.

"Oh she is a Long-Leg Kicking Pouch Hare!" she said after a quick pause to decide where put Shang-Shixiong's things, dropping it on top of a block of hay before grabbing an apron for herself. "Liu-shidi said that she attacked him on his last hunt, but she was already too hurt. So he brought her to me to see if I could help."

"I-Is it safe for her to be here?!" Shang Qinghua squeaked, hiding behind one of the empty stalls.

"Oh, dont be silly, she's sweetheart!" Wu Qingfang gushed as she opened the stall, pulling Shang-Shixiong by his wrist. "Come, she's still sleeping from last night meds, and I need to change her wrappings."

He stared at her as if she had gone mad. She didn't mind thought, she knew that the only other peak lord that shared her enthusiasm for animals was Liu-shidi.

With needles ready, she let go of Shang Qinghua to puncture the beast in the right places to keep her sleeping. After that was just a matter of checking vitals, cleaning up her wounds, and applying some salve. By the look on her belly, she might have a litter soon, so Wu Qingfang wanted to release her before she gave birth, or the little stall would be too cramped. Not to mention how protective the mother would become, too dangerous to be kept.

Surprisingly enough, when he realized the Kicking Hare wasn't going to wake up and eat him, Shang Qinghua was really helpful. He wasn't afraid to get his hands dirty, only making a funny face when the Hare's belly moved when the babies adjusted themselves.

They worked quickly, and in no time Kicking Hare was all wrapped up in clean bandages, the soft smell of salve mixing up with alcohol and wet fur. They put the aprons away, and Wu Qingfang was satisfied enough with Shang Qinghua's help to consider his request. And she was ready to get her sweets and tell him that she would help him with Shen-Shixiong bad humor when-

A loud noise of something extremely heavy hitting the ground reached them both making the stable walls tremble, followed by a grunt that Wu Qingfang would recognize anywhere.

They stepped outside to meet Liu Qingge next to a huge type of lizard, covered in dirt and blood.

Wu Qingfang didn't even blink. After Shang Qinghua, Liu Qingge was the other peak lord that would barge into Ling You peak as if it were his second house, but for entirely different reasons. Usually involving huge monsters laying dead in front of Wu Qingfang's doors, ready to be butchered and harvested. Or, like Long-Leg Kicking Pouch Hare, he would bring life beasts, creatures that gained his respect for being good fighters. And Wu Qingfang would care for each of them before setting them back to freedom.

Interestingly though, she didn't remember any other occasion when they have met each other in her peak. Which meant she had never seen them interacting outside peak meetings before. Not to say she couldn't notice how hard Liu-shidi was blushing, doing his best to fix his ponytail, while Shang-Shixiong looked at him from head to toe, his qi warming up the air around him.

Men, as subtle as a thunder hippo in a storm.

"Shidi," she stepped in front of the War God, forcing him to look at her. "What brings you here so soon?"

Having being snapped from whatever was his glaring contest with Shang-Shixiong, he went back to his practical self, hands on his back with feet parallel to his shoulders in a ready stance.

"I came here to deliver my last hunt and request Wu-shijie to lend me her tools so I can clean it up."

"Is that a Southern Fire Komodo?" Shang Qinghua approached the creature, staying a good few steps away from it just in case. Although it looked pretty dead by the pool of bright blue blood coagulating around it.

Apparently Liu-shidi was able to control himself this time, only his very visible ears turning beet red as he shuffled his feet. Still he made himself nod at Shang-Shixiong's question, then going on to explain what were his plans for the skin and the meat. It never ceased to amuse Wu Qingfang how Liu-shidi would eat everything he hunted down, at least once.

It gave Mu Qingfang several white hairs, so it made her giggle a little too much.

"- and for the bones I was thinking of using it to craft into a staff. They're very strong."

"You should give some to Wei-Shixiong, I bet he could carve a nice handle for a sword out of it."

"I hate to interrupt the flow of ideas, Shixiong, Shidi, but to make it all happen, first you have to harvest it," and she was being sincere about it, the past minutes have been fascinating to watch Shang-Shixiong get closer and closer to Liu-Shidi as the War God puffed out his chest like a proud bird showing off his catch. "Come, Shidi, I wasn't expecting you, so I have to see if Wen Rong has finished using my knives."

"I better get going then," Shang Qinghua turned to give her a little bow, batting his eyelashes at her one last time. "Will shimei consider my request?"

"I'll return your basket with my answer, Shixiong," she smiled sweetly at him, going to join Liu-shidi who was already a few steps ahead.

The sound of hissing made the three peak lords freeze, and the sound of whipping made them jump into action, hands going to their swords. But even on the brink of death, the Komodo creature was faster than lightning, using its tail to sweep at the cultivators with vengeance.

Actually, sweep at Shang Qinghua, the one close enough to be hit by it.

The following seconds seemed to pass as if they were under a slowing spell. There was a whizz on Wu Qingfang's ears as Shang Qinghua jumped on his sword to fly over the Komodo's tail. When she thought she would be able to catch her breath, Shang Qinghua grabbed the handle of his blade, twisting his body in a flurry of fabric, using his weight to stab the creature right on its belly. Blood splattered everywhere, painting yellow An Ding robes in electric blue as Shang Qinghua dragged his sword all the way to the Komodo's neck, the warm stank of viscera hanging in the air.

"Holy shit," she heard Liu-shidi mumble next to her, snapping her out of her surprise.

"Shixiong!" She screamed as she rushed towards him, almost slipping on all the blood. "Shixiong are you okay?!"

"I'm fine!" the squeak came from somewhere next to the head of the beast, so Wu Qingfang went around the mess to avoid dirtying herself as well. She found him lying on the ground, an arm covering his face while his other hand grasped firmly on his sword, the blade so deep inside the creature she could barely see the handle.

"Shidi! Go call Mu Qingfang-"

"Nooo!" he went to pull her robes, cursing as he realized that he had messed up her clothes. "Shimei, no, please, I'm fine, promise!" and to prove his point he stood up in a quick jump, giving her a twirl. "See? Nothing broken, not even a scratch! Please don't bother Mu-shidi, please?"

And once again he blinked his big brown eyes, and even though he was drenched in blood, she couldn't help but sigh.

"So uh..." Liu-shidi said after cleaning up his throat, pulling their attention to him. "Should I call Mu Qingfang or...?"

And in a snap of fingers, Shang Qinghua took over the situation, putting himself between Wu Qingfang and Liu Qingge.

"No need, no need, Liu-shidi. Why don't you go fetch Wu-shimei's head disciple to grab her knives and take care of this mess?" He said as he put his hand on Liu Qingge's lower back, gently moving him away from them. "I'm fine, Wu-shimei will let me clean up and she will keep an eye on me, won't you, shimei?"

She seriously considered shoving him back on the puddle of blood, just for putting her on the spot like this. But she apparently had a case of weak knees when Shang-Shixiong dropped his voice all honey sweet.

She couldn't let him find out or she would be in serious trouble.

"Right, please Liu-shidi, go talk to Wen Rong, he will help you. I'll take care of Shang-Shixiong in case the blood has any poison."

Shang Qinghua kept nodding his head like a silly doll but lowered his voice to mumble something on Liu Qingge's ear along the lines of "I'll teach you later." Wu Qingfang couldn't see Liu-shidi's face, but she could see the back of his neck red as peppers.

"Shixiong," she called with a wave of her hand, pausing only to get his things left in the stables to guide him towards her private quarters. On the way, she pulled a disciple to request a bath and clean clothes.

It took a few minutes to get everything ready, time that she used to examine Shang Qinghua's eyes and tongue, checking for any signs of poisoning. She found nothing, but better safe than sorry.

"You bath is ready, go," she gently shoved him to the next room. "The clothes are there as well, if you feel anything scream. Understood?"

"Yes, shimei," he said with a smile over his shoulder. Then it was a game of waiting, with Wu Qingfang pretending not to be worried sick while Shang Qinghua took his sweet time. To occupy herself, she went over her cabinets for all types of antidotes she could find, on top of requesting at least three types of tea. It wouldn't hurt to be prepared.

Honestly, she was about to bust into the room property be damned when he finally stepped out.

She had misjudged his size entirely. The robes were too small, the fabric taut over his shoulders, the tight sleeves of her peak uniform showing off strong arms capable of carrying weights upon weights all day. No wonder his sword had cut thick scaly skin like butter.

She refused to lower her gaze to his legs, forcing herself to stare at his face framed by his wavy hair. She had only seen it down at formal peak meetings, even so the strands had been pulled away from his face.

He looked younger like this. Softer.

"This Shixiong thanks his shimei for her hospitality," he said with a formal bow. "I hope you don't mind me being so forward, but I used a bit of your hair oil."

"Not- Don't worry about it," she blinked several times, trying not to think of him dressed up in her colors and with her perfume all over him. She was the Beast keeper but she wasn't a beast herself! She had self-control!! "Come, I got you some tea, and some pills for you to take, just in case."

Shang Qinghua didn't say anything, letting himself be fussed over, eyes crinkling in a poorly hidden smile. See if she gets worried about him again!

And to knock the smile off his face she decided that a little needling would do him good. "I didn't know you and Liu-shidi were intimate," she casually dropped as her form of petty revenge, doing her best to appear innocent as Shang Qinghua choked on his bitter tea.

"Who- What? No, uh, we just-"

"Shixiong," she made an effort to say it as kindly as possible, to show him she wasn't going to tease him. Much. "You are aware the entire Sect has eyes, correct?"

"O-of course I know that, what type of question-"

"So you know everyone already noticed you getting Sect Leaders left and right wrapped around your fingers. Right?"

He coughed a bit more, eyes so wild she was afraid they might pop out of his face. He opened and closed his mouth like fish, his blush making her want to squeeze his face.

She took a sip of her own tea, nothing like the nasty dirt water Shang Qinghua was being made to drink, as she considered how to break down the news to him.

Should she be the one to tell him about his reputation? Or should her just mention how the head disciples were running a ridiculously high bet on who would be the next Peak Lord to fall for Shang Qinghua charms? It was tempting to let him figure it out for himself…

Or.

Or she could get herself a little something out of the situation as well.

"Shang-Shixiong,” she sighed as she put her cup down, crossing her hands over her lap as she gave him a look up and down. “I know your friendship is not as deep as yours with Mu-shidi,” she couldn't resist giving him a knowing look that made his blush deepen and avoid her eyes. “But I consider ourselves friends enough that I can speak plainly.”

“... O-Of course, shimei.”

“Good. Now, with all due respect, for the past year or so I've seen you flirt your way to get Zhangmen-Shixiong and Shen-Shixiong into having a calm discussion without tears and blood for an hour. It’s also worth mentioning how things have been less explosive on Wan Jian peak, and!” She raised her voice slightly the moment he opened his mouth to protest. “I’ve just seen you pull Liu-shidi by his waist. And he seemed to like it.”

He scratched the side of his face, once again looking everywhere but her eyes. She knew he wasn’t embarrassed, she had seen him truly embarrassed before, but she could see he didn’t know what to do with her knowledge of his romantic affairs.

“I’m not scolding you, I hope you understand that,” she said after a quick pause, ignoring the tug at her heart when he turned his big puppy eyes at her. “I’m just wondering what you are trying to achieve with all this… And if you would be interested in joining the betting poll.”

That made him snap his eyes back at her faster than Shen Qingqiu opening his fan to ignore Zhangmen-Shixiong. “Wait, there’s a betting poll?”

“Oh Shixiong…” she tsk at his lack of foresight, shaking her head slightly. “Of course there’s a betting poll. This has been the most exciting thing to happen since last recruitment.”

He let out a small “Huh” of surprise, crossing his arms (crossing his arms which she was not looking at, definitely not- as he bit the corner of his thumb. He got quiet for a good while, eyebrows frowning as his eyes darted side to side in the face she had seen him doing when he got caught trying to figure out big numbers.

“Before you ask, I’m not going to give away my mole,” she said as she popped one of the small cakes he had brought her that morning, the crunchy melon seeds mixed with honey giving her something delicious to chew on while he scrambled to figure out how all that had happened behind his back.

“Okay, fair. But, Shimei, what exactly is everyone betting on?”

“A couple of things,” she took another small cake, amused as he leaned forward, as if she was about to tell him the hottest gossip he has ever heard. Technically it was true, so she couldn’t blame his curiosity. “There’s a bet about you sleeping with all the peak lords and ladies. That one is not as high as it could be because, well, it’s known that some peak lords and lady wouldn’t be interested. And then there’s a second bet, involving who is the next peak lord that is going to fall for your tricks-”

“Tricks?! I’m not-”

“Shh, and there’s another one about when is Mu-shidi going to actually confess his love for you and stop your flirting ways-”

“Now, hold on for a second-”

“And finally there’s a bet among a select group of Peak Leaders on who is going to seduce you before you seduce them.”

“Oh my Heavens. Is this Wei-Shixiong doing? It has his fingers all over it, I can feel it.”

“I don’t know, Shixiong, but between the two of us, you would be the one knowing how Wei-Shixiong hands feel, I guess.”

“Shimei!”

She just shrugged, unbothered by his hypocritical sense of shame. “Do you want to get your carriage to Hua Hua palace or not?” she asked before he could start scolding her. Not that would do much, she had seen him too many times out of his mind after spending weeks without sleep to take him that seriously.

He paused, biting the corner of his lip, and if she squinted her eyes hard enough she would see his brain working the pros and cons.

“Okay, what do you suggest?”

She clapped her hands to clean the crumbles out of her fingers, giving him a honeyed smile.

“You help win one over Wei-Shixiong and spread the rumor that we are going to spend a lot of time together. Then Wen Rong will bet on my name next round. In exchange I will get your carriage to Hua Hua Palace so you can jump back on Shen-Shixiong bed.”

“Hmm…” Shang Qinghua kept playing with his empty cup of tea, wobbling it left and right. During her little speech he kept stealing glances of her, head tilted to the side. She was starting to get nervous, reaching for another cake just to do something with her hands when he grabbed her by the wrist, pulling her hand closer, eating the cake from her fingers.

Her entire brain went blank and suddenly she could only smell honey, jasmine and the bitter tea from his cup, her heart stuttering to a stop.

“Isn’t shimei curious, though?” he asked against her thumb, licking the crumbs on it before kissing the palm of her hand. “Shimei has called it so many things, tricks, spell… Even so, I have seen shimei looking at me after my bath…”

She should stand up and send him away, money and pettiness damned. Yes, they have been flirting for the past months, but she refused to be just another mark on his list. She shouldn’t be considering his shameless suggestion but a voice that sounded suspiciously like Wei-Shixiong whispered in her ear that if the rumor was to be out and about, why not have a taste of the real thing for herself? Why not enjoy the strength of his hands on her waist like Liu-shidi did just hours before, why not push him to his limits and see what he was capable of?

It was as if he was reading her mind, because Shang Qinghua wasted no time in pulling her hand closer, kissing the inside of her wrist. He kept pressing soft kisses up her arm and when the table got in the way he slid it to the side so he could pull her by her waist, moving her hair to the side so he could caress her cheek, giving her no time to think, no time to breath-

“Tell me, Shimei, was it jealousy in your eyes when you saw me touching Liu-Shidi? Did you want it to be you?”

She wanted to scream no, because she didn’t! She really didn’t!! But she couldn’t deny how she wished he had lowered his voice to her, making promises of later encounters.

But to admit that would be giving in too easily.

“One cannot be jealous of one that doesn’t belong to them, Shixiong,” she made herself say instead, keeping her eyes forward to not fall for his tricks, biting the inside of her cheek to hold back a gasp when he pressed his nose against her neck.

“Oh, is that it? Do you want me to belong to you, Shimei?” and then he dared to kiss her shoulder over her robes. The heat of his mouth hadn’t even touched her sensitive skin and she was already trembling, mouth dry. “So does it make you happy to see me in your colors? Or maybe is the scent of your perfume all over me that makes you shiver?”

Oh he was a demon. He was a demon that knew too well how to read her, how to make it impossible to not fall into temptation. She looked at him, swallowing dry at the sight of his hair curling softly around his face, still wet from his bath. And those damned soft brown eyes, staring at her as if he could see her desire written all over her soul, the most annoying smirk on his lips. She wanted to bite, she wanted to squish his face until he was pouting again, she wanted for him to pin her down, she wanted to fight him and lose-

He pounced and she let herself be caught, tangling her hands on his soft hair, pulling him closer until he was pressing her down the floor. He moved as if he needed to devour her entirely, biting and sucking the thin skin of her throat, marking her just like she wished to mark him.

“S-Shixiong-” she gasped, her hands going down on his back, nails catching in the folds of the fabric as she desperately tried to hang on as he bit down her clavicle hard enough to sting. He licked the bruise on her tanned skin and she melted, a sigh escaping her lips as he pushed her robes to the side, scraping his teeth over plump skin, teasing a bite that never came, both of them pausing at the loud sound of fabric being torn apart.

“I think-” Shang Qinghua said against her chest, voice muffled by her robes. “I think I just ripped my pants.”

A giggle bubbled out of her lips as she realized the ridiculous situation they were both in. And it should ruin the mood, laughter filling the air instead of the previous moans, but she realized she actually liked the lightness of it. It was mostly for the bet but it was fun, especially when she noticed his warm smile as he admired her with mussed up hair and ruffled clothes.

“Now, I would love to make good on my word here and now, but I believe my favorite shimei deserves a better treatment than her office floor where anyone could walk on us,” he said as he took her hand again, biting the tip of her finger.

“I think I agree,” she answered with a gasp and a nod, carefully taking her hand away from his mouth to sit down and pull him to a sweet kiss before dragging him to her rooms, their laughter becoming moaning once more.

—------

“Ye Ling.”

“Wen Rong,” she gave him a nod, not bothering to raise her eyes from her thick notebook filled with notes, not even when he set a big bag of coins next to her wet stone.

“I came to make a bet.”

Still she didn’t look at him, putting her brush down to open the bag and count the money. She did raise her eyebrows at the amount, though. This might have been all his savings. Or he had a patreon.

Considering who his shizun was…

“Betting on your own peak lord or lady is against the rules.”

“What?! But Ming Fan made a bet on Shen-shishu three days ago!”

“And then he was made to pay back all the money he won when I found out he had set Shen-shishu to have a private meeting with Shang-Shizun.” She said as she pushed the money back on his bag, dangling it in front of him so he could catch it. “Hence why we made the rule. Don't blame me, blame Qing Jing peak for not being smart enough.”

Thank Heavens he didn't try to fight, grabbing his pouch and turning around to leave the small room she had been using as headquarters for her operation. More like a closet, actually, she thought as she glared at the broom resting next to her on the wall.

It was his heavy footsteps that made her look up again, frowning at the other head disciple.

“Shidi, rules are rules-”

“I want to make a new bet.” And she could see by his own surprised look that he was bluffing. She felt a twitch of pity for him, Wu-shishu was a scary woman, to go back to her with empty hands would be the same as asking to clean the stables for months.

“I want to bet on him finding out,” he kept talking and the mere thought of it sent all her hairs up. She would be in so much trouble it wasn't even funny, she would be so dead Shizun would send her to work on a faraway farm and-

“Do you know something?”

“I don't know,” he crossed his arms, too smug for someone who had been just sent away with their tail between their legs. “But I need to make a bet and this is my choice. I bet that Shang-shishu will find out about the bets before next month.”

She wanted to say no, to send him away again, but that would be the same as calling herself a coward. She glanced at the pouch on his hand and then at him, giving her brush a good bite before sighing in defeat.

“Alright, one bet in the name of Wen Rong: Shang Qinghua will find out about the betting before next month. Your bet will be added to the poll.”

“Thank you,” he said as he dropped the money on her improvised desk. “See you next month, shijie!” And then he walked away, closing the door behind himself.

“See you next month, shijie,” she mumbled as she made a face, then showed her tongue at the door. Her anger was short lived though, the weight of his words hitting her fully.

“Oh God, I'm so dead.” She whispered at no one, groaning as she hid her face between her hands.

Time was ticking, and now she had a month to find a way to tell her shizun about her little scheme.

------------

I did it!! The fic curse fought me tooth and nail but I finished!!!

And with more disciples shenanigans!!! jsbskdnsnd :D

I was so tempted to make Mobei-Jun show up behind Ye Ling and scare the shit out of her yall have no idea fjsbakdnakdn but that would be throwing another character for me to deal with, so no Mobei-Jun............ Yet

Next on the list is Divination Peak! :D I have an idea, Wikipedia links and a dream of surviving the end of the semester, so it might take a moment but I'm gonna finish this!!!

BTW, there are still two slots open for peak lords/ladies! If you want to suggest a name and a peak, please do!

And here is the masterpost of this AU

Thank you so much for giving this a read!!! It makes me so so happy to see you guys enjoying this, you have no idea <3

That's it for today folks! See you on Peak 9/12!!!

[coolshadowtwins]

SVSSS System Reveal Fic round up!

If you know one that hasn’t been recc’ed, then please put it in the comments/tags! I’ll add it to the post!

A Transmigrator and a Time Traveler Walk into the Bamboo House by VeryCharismaticDragon

Over a year after Shen Qingqiu's death, Luo Binghe consults his servant's servant, concurrently his disgraced martial uncle, for a way to bring the love of his life back. Shang Qinghua sends him in the direction of a certain time-traveling artifact, which supposedly brings one to the day they first met their soulmate.

Odd, though, that the artifact ends up missing the destination by just a few years…

A story in which post-Abyss Luo Binghe relives his disciple days, while juggling his secrets, traumas, and some unexpected revelations about the man he loves on top of that.

What is Seen by CaveteDracones

…is not [always] the real truth.

Truth-compelling artifacts in the hands of an enemy to one side, SYSTEM-mandated silence on the other, and Shen Qingqiu caught between the two. Is it too late to go back to the Water Prison? (NOTE: This one was recommended three times, and I have personally reread it multiple times. It’s one of my favorites and I really do want to read more fics in a similar vein lol)

open my lungs to let you in by ghostybreads

Shen Qingqiu had a secret. So, naturally, it was only a matter of time before he was hit by a truth serum wife plot.

//

“How are you?”

“Horny. Kind of want Binghe to rail me, I guess. But it’s manageable.”

Liu Qingge’s hand on his forehead froze, and he was close enough that Shen Qingqiu could hear his breathing stop. He stared back expressionlessly, the mortification distantly crawling up the back of his neck. Honest One-Horned–

The frustrated scream that he usually vented in his head, came out straight from mouth.

“aaAAAAAHHHH GODDAMNIT AIRPLANE–”

Futility in Practice by TGP

When Luo Binghe is fourteen years old, his shizun suffers a terrible qi deviation and fever that completely changes who he is.

and judgment is just like a cup that we share by Kieron_ODuibhir

The blob finished rotating into place in a way that wasn’t quite compatible with geometry as Shen Qingqiu understood it, and cleared a throat it didn’t seem to have.

“Greetings,” it said, somehow clearly addressing him in particular more than the room as a whole despite its total lack of features other than blueness and translucency. “I’m here on behalf of the Hyper-Celestial Peace and Order Enforcement Bureau. Crime scene secure, proceeding to interviews. Beginning with Subject One: You are Shen Qingqiu, formerly Shen Yuan, also known as Peerless Cucumber?”

First, do no harm by Terias

Shen Qingqiu has been acting especially erratic since awakening from his three day coma after a severe qi deviation.

Mu Qingfang investigates and discovers a great many things about his new shixiong. (NOTE: This one has Shen Yuan and Shen Jiu as the same soul, technically, but it still works I think!)

Show The Screenshots by A_Non_ymousWriter

When a rogue foreign System sends out a subtle virus, some outsiders are shown chat messages between a certain two transmigrators and their Systems.

AirplaneBro: nah dude shen jiu would never lay a hand on his female disciples like that, hes gay

Liu Qingge tripped on thin air while Mu Qingfang choked on his tea as Shang Qinghua (their god? creator??) casually shattered their view of their original Shen Qingiu. The fake Shen Qingqiu at least, was sharing their shock.

CucumberBro: EXCUSE ME WHAT??

CucumberBro: The fuck he is?!?! He literally GOES TO BROTHELS! LIU QINGGE FOUND HIM IN BED WITH A WOMAN THAT ONE TIME?

AirplaneBro: aight bro buckle the fuck up cuz imma take u on a joyride all about shen jiu >:)

—————-

Binghes#1Fan: I don't want to send Binghe into the Abyss...

System 2: User must comply, if User cannot do the task User will be punished and the account will be terminated.

Mobeis #1Fan: sorry bro unless ur okay w being ded af u gotta push binghe into the abyss

Ning Yingying's fists clenched. Okay, so trying to get Yuan-ge and A-Luo together would be harder than she thought.

[ur-mousey]

Time Moves ~

Yandere!God! True Form! Sukuna x Disciple! F!Reader! Prt 2.

Part One

summary Sukuna reminds you that your only purpose is to worship his cock. 1.6k. warning mature, smut, possessive themes, blowjob and pussy-eating, lesbian orgy?, praise, dub-con.

..............................

"Pet, admit it already." Sukuna peered down at your naked form. "Tell me you're mad. Never once have I wanted you to bite your tongue."

You weren't in a state to be where you were. You scrambled from the edge of the steps. Your instinct could only register the idea of a drop. 

Your throat constricted around itself. And your skin brimmed all over with goosebumps. You had little strength to reply. Instead, you found yourself pressing your lips tight together. Scared of even your breath coming out into the frigid air. Your right side ached. Scrapes marred your skin from the earlier fall. You folded in, knees to breast, which felt too heavy. "I suggest you respond to me. Quick." Sukuna twirled the black rose pin's tip, embedded in his skin. 

The skin remained taut against the curve of the metal, raising slightly with the direction of the pin.

You wanted to scoff. The breeze carried your hair through its fingers. It pulled the mass forward. No longer could you view the clear image of your God, Sukuna. Wisps of hair clung to the tears and snot drying on your face. Your jaw remained clenched, glued together via mucus. And you struggled to release the tension. You couldn't breathe. Your airways felt constricted. Nothing could pass into it or out of it.

You weren't always the only disciple of your God. 

You remembered that time vaguely. When the temple was filled with other concubines. Some claimed the mantle of favorite pet. The first few days up on the mountain were rough. You were strapped to a wooden chair, forced into a corner where you'd slept. You had only seen your God once before when he discovered you along his nightly stroll. Time before then didn't exist. Who you were or how you got there didn't matter. 

You felt humiliated. Clothes felt miles away when not on your body. Or anyone, for that matter. Yet, you watched the concubines ignore your presence. They seldom paid you attention until your stomach growls obnoxiously. 

On the third day, they gave you more food. You ate the white rice and drank the warm chrysanthemum tea gleefully. And, the concubine of the hour prayed with you. You both recited the words of your God. 

She touched you differently than the others who attended you. Your pussy throbbed at her ministration. "This won't do at all," She huffed against your virgin hole. "Our God means to claim you soon. But I'm afraid you're still too tight." Her delicate fist prodded inside you. You ground your hips forward, kneading your puffy clit on her nose. She moved her head, eyes locking onto you. "Do relax for me. Breathe in and out." She gestured for you to follow along. 

Breathe in. The concubine's fingers circled your entrance. Tingles shot up into your core. "You're so wet. That's a good girl, now, breathe out for me." Your pussy lips swelled at her praise. You tried to focus solely on her, but the others dutifully laid out their futons. Laughter sparked from the petite concubines who suckled on each other's breasts.

There was a kinship there that you felt you would never be a part of.

Lips were being kissed. Cunts were played with and ate up. You had stared at a pair of girls at the center of it all. They slotted their legs together, their pink flushed pussies rubbed against each other. Their moans sent shivers down your front. "Aah, ah ah, pretty girl, focus on me. Breathe out." You nodded, tearing your eyes away. "Good girl, we will have so much fun together after Lord Sukuna fucks you tonight. Your pussy will feel so sweet against mine. Just be my good girl..."

The concubine purred into your folds. "Breathe..." You released the air trapped within your pounding chest. The concubine's fist dove inside your sopping mess. The intruding object pumped your G-spot rapidly. Her tongue ghosted over your clit, whispering sweet nothings. "Cum, pretty girl, we're all waiting."

Indeed, they were, and your God awaited for your finish. You couldn't tell when your eyes shut to the room around you. The noises climbed into the pores of your skin. It mixed with your mewls of pleasure, and it encouraged you to release. "She's ready for you."

"Clean her." Your eyes widen to meet your God. His four eyes raked over your body. "Take her to my chambers."

"Of Course. Shall I accompany you two during her deflowering?" The concubine kneeled perfectly. She spent the next month teaching you before she departed from the temple. "Sample, Lord Sukuna." She raised, her fingers covered in your slick. Your breath hitched as the sly smile on her face grew. "She tastes absolutely splendid."

"You aren't needed." Sukuna gripped her wrist. "I would rather taste it from the source. But, if you insist." You never had a choice.

Strapped. Stripped. Humiliated. What did your word matter?

You didn't want this. But, you bit your tongue.

>>>

What to do with a pet dumb like you? You break too damn easy when you are allowed thoughts. Were you dense? You short-circuit at the sight of low-ranked curses. Yet, you had the gall to demand stuff of him. 

You remained frozen while fireworks began to crackle in the air. They were bright and far. And colors danced on your pale skin. None of it caught your attention. Wasn't this what you wanted? Fireworks with your God. Yet, you worked yourself up again after mild teasing. What a boring pet you were? He's afraid. You would be dead in front of any other predator less benevolent than he. However, he couldn't kill you.

In fact, he tended to overreact when it came to you.

Sukuna plucked the pin from his chest. He held it above your head. It gleamed with each spark of color in the air. Yellows and green swirled atop the black metallic. His blood dripped down along his arm. You're nothing but a hindrance. You made him weak. He neglected his urge to pillage and rape. His budding army of curses was forsaken of his commands. His birthright as God seeped through his fingers like sand. 

You were the only one who prayed to him.

Sukuna fought the idea of a new harem. They would take care of you and him. "Tsk, pet." He sighed, it wouldn't do. "Caused trouble again. I have to say, it's quite bold of you." A long time ago, you were merely a mouse under his feline gaze, meek and incredibly disposable.

"There's fireworks," Nevertheless, he'd sought out your inexperienced pussy for his cock's satisfaction. His infatuation grew too big for him to rationalize. "I've waited too looong." Sukuna drawled his words. He had killed those skanks one by one. You were none the wiser. He had started with the bitch who loosened you up. Your first time withering under a mouth was stolen from him.

"I think I need to rip out a response from you." Sukuna tossed around the black rose pin in his four different palms. "Let's see. Eenie meenie miney mo." His bottom right hand caught the pin. He brought his fist down onto your thigh. Your hoarse throat let out a shrill. The boom of his laughter rivaled the fireworks that drowned out your screams. He taunted and cackled. "There, there, shush, my pet."

>>>

"I- um... I'm mah-ad," The words hiccuped in the back of your throat. You struggled to remain in a kneel. Your posture slouched. Your heart couldn't handle the barrage of noises. Heat coursed through your leg at the slightest change of pressure. "I hate you," You whispered under your breath. "I never wanted to be here." Your tears flowed freely. Light rain splashed your checks and tickled your nose.

The mouth on your God's stomach licked from your ear to the edge of your cupid's bow. "Want to continue your tantrum, girl. I suggest that you think carefully. You're starting to piss me off."

Your upcoming tangent was muffled. Sukuna's hands tied your hair in a knot close to the nape. "Take it back," A mouth grew on the palm of your God's hand. The voice breathed sultry against your ear. "I trained you better. An obedient pet should only be concerned with her master's cock." His fingertips grazed the flats of your ear, tugging your mouth further down his erection.

He guided you vertically. Pounding your beaten throat softly. Sukuna grunted as he allowed you to take the lead. You flattened your tongue at his swollen head. Your chapped lips puckered as you spit a wade of saliva down his girth. Both your hands pumped his length. You dared to make eye contact as you said:

"Why can't you be normal? I hate that you had other concubines." You pouted before hollowing your cheeks. You sucked him in. Your tongue cushioned his base, and your teeth playfully nicked his head. Just the way he likes it. You massaged his balls with your slime-ridden hands. Smearing a concoction of pre-cum and salvia on his skin.

"Brat. I only have you now." Sukuna bucked his hips. His head rolled back onto his shoulders. You flattened your tongue against Sukuna's swollen head. "I wouldn't dare to have anyone else.

"You're my perfect little pet. A stupid little thing. Your God will think for you. You won't have to worry about a thing. Food. Sleep. Sex. As long as you continue to worship me. I'll bring you back from wherever you go, even if it's mental. And I assure you, your hate is the truest form of love. So again. Say it around my dick."

.............................. Thank you for reading! And thanks for all the support on the last part! I wasn't going to make a part three buuuut, idk. Request rules are here!

>>> NEXT JJK POST: Reader's Secret Request ~ ft. Geto Suguru >>>> Edited Part 1! Reread if you feel inclined.

I was in a little slump writing this #period-problems. I decided to just write, and this is what you got. Fyi, I would love to write some more female x female fics, so more coming in the future.

[mafuyussweater]

My Favorite Bingqiu (Bingyuan) fics

Be sure to read tags!

Leave kudos and comments for the authors!

Enjoy ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡ (to be added to as a read more)

lowly disciple's self insert fanfic system by:

Allpiesforourown

Mature • canon divergence

Airplane and Cucumber-bro figure out they are transmigrators earlier on. Shen Qingqius disciples are STICKY. Luo Binghe writes self insert fanfic about his Shizun.

☆彡

Sweet Dreams Are Made of This by: Prudabaga

Explicit • Canon Divergence (fix-it?)

Shen Qingqiu can't help that his dreams all seem to revolve around sleeping with the protagonist. It doesn't make him gay. He hardly has a choice even if he really does enjoy them.. anyone would!

☆彡

Tie Up the Broken Threads of That Old Dream by: Ehann

Mature • Canon Divergence (fix-it)

Shen Qingqiu self detonates and causes the system to go haywire. He wakes up in the past with no system at all and finds Luo Binghe fresh out of the Abyss. He is determined to make things right this time.

☆彡

Remnants of Gold by: Wemmye

Teen+ • Canon Divergence? (No Transmigrators)

Su Xiyan still takes the poison but somehow she manages to survive. Her and Binghe grow up as farmers and she helps her son hide his demon side with a jade pendant. She really doesn't trust cultivators but Shen Yuan, one of the two peak lords of Qing Jings peak, convinces her to let Luo Binghe learn cultivation from him.

☆彡

Tarnished Gold by: Prim_The_Amazing

Mature • Canon Divergence (in a major way)

Shen Yuan transmigrates into the body of Gongyi Xiao and meets a post Abyss Luo Bingge who wants to take his place as Head Disciple.

☆彡

The Divide Between Autumn and Spring by: sareyen

Mature • AU

Shen Yuan transmigrates into a disciple of Qing Jing who shares his same name. He is out of his depth when he realizes this body has a damaged core and also that he is well before canon PIDW with all of the future peak lords being just young teens! He manages to make lots of friends, becomes a beloved head disciple, and saves a few people too.

(This is angsty y'all but oml this is a MASTERPIECE -with a happy end dw)

☆彡

If Marriage Was an Olympic Sport by: anatheme

Explicit • Wife Plot (set during the Abyss arc)

Shen Qingqiu accidentally sets of a "wife hunt" that requires 12 participants to hunt down the "wife". He has from sunrise to sunset to run for his life to avoid being forced into marriage.

☆彡

safe and stranded by: anatheme

Mature• Modern era-ish (fix-it)

Shen Qingqiu self detonation causes the system to glitch and it sends him (and Binghe) to his old life and he has 3 days to experience living in the modern world again before he will be sent back to his body that was fall towards his death.

☆彡

picture you by: wnter_autumn

Explicit • Modern Au

Shen Yuan sleeps with his friend Luo Binghe and freaks out about it because he is straight... right?

☆彡

dreaming you the same sun in a different place by: JRaylin441

Explicit • Reverse Transmigration

Shen Qingqiu disappears and Luo Binghe gets a notification from the System offering a side quest called In Another Life that requires him to find his husband in his original body in the modern world. Unfortunately his husband has no memory of living in PIDW!

☆彡

Stealing Sun From the Flowers by: CherrieBabie

Explicit • Canon Divergence

Shen Yuan wakes up in his mushroom body with no memory of ever being Shen Qingqiu and no access to a system so he thinks he lucked out! Unfortunately as he is roaming around as a rogue cultivator he gets captured in the Huan Hua territory and meets Luo Binghe himself who is really upset that this guy looks really similar to his dead Shizun.

☆彡

Being a 30-Year-Old Virgin Made Shen Yuan a Wizard! By: stormsonjupiter

Explicit • Cherry Magic Au

The Cherry Magic we all love but make it Bingyuan!

☆彡

if you don't have your own boyfriend, rented is fine by: nyoomerr

Mature • Modern Au

Luo Bingge searches for his own nice Shizun and ends up in the modern world with Shen Yuan who is kind of rude and only looks a little bit like Shen Qingqiu.

Shen Yuan thinks Bingge is a poor cosplayer and asks to hire him as his pretend boyfriend to show appreciation for the real authentic cosplay.. that's all!

☆彡

Life is (not) a Hallmark Movie by: mellicindi

Teen+ • Modern Au

Shen Yuan watches this one ASMR cooking channel and finds the video needing some improvements but the guys voice is really really nice! Then he ends up at his friend Shang Qingyuan apartment and sees a familiar countertop...

☆彡

Tell Me Your Heart Doesn't Race for a Hurricane or a Burning Building by: Bluethursday

Explicit • Modern (stalker Au)

Shen Yuan opens his door to a handsome stranger who says "Hi, are you Shen Yuan? I'm Luo Binghe, your new live-in caretaker"

☆彡

Mightier than Waves by: bedesbummie

Explicit • Modern Au (kinda stalker ish)

Shen Yuan goes to pick up his sisters backpack from the rec center and when no one seems to be coming to help him, he searches for an employee and runs into shirtless and overly handsome Luo Binghe. After that day he can't help but find himself back at the rec center to get another glimpse of Binghe. Under the guise of wanting to improve his physical health.

☆彡

a thousand jars by:tagteamme

Explicit • Post Canon

Shen Qinghua finds himself feeling incredibly jealous. There is porn. That's the fic (it's so good)

☆彡

Starstruck by: Camorra

Explicit • Modern Au (musicians)

Shen Yuan, who is known for making videos playing bass in accompaniment to Luo Binghe's songs, gets a message from someone saying they could get him in touch with famous musician Luo Binghe. At first he doesn't believe it but then he receives a photo of his bandmates taking a selfie and decides to not let this opportunity slip by.

☆彡

Halasana by: The Feels Whale (miscella)

Explicit • Modern Au (yoga)

Luo Binghe (known slut) makes a bet with his coworker Sha Hualing that he will stop sleeping with his hot clients to prove he doesn't /need/ sex. And then it all goes to shit when Shen Yuan comes waltzing in for their one-on-one session.

☆彡

# KissingTheHomiesGoodnight by: knothim

Explicit • Modern Au

Shen Yuans "no homo" mental gymnastics his way into messing around with Luo Binghe using the dumbest logic only he could come up with.

☆彡

[web-novel-polls]

WN Women Bonus Polls #2: MXTX

[Propaganda below] - Spoilers Warning!

A-Qing from Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation / MDZS

Submission: Incredibly clever. Fakes blindness to survive as a street orphan and pickpocket people. Successfully deceives a magnificent liar into believing she's really blind for years. Tries to hinder said liar's schemes and save people from him even after she's dead and actually blind and unable to speak. 

Jiang Yanli from Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation

 “Madam, A-Xian is my younger brother. Him being humiliated by others, to me, isn’t just a small matter.”

Submission: She is the sweetest person to ever exist. She's a wonderful big sister to her brother Jiang Cheng and her shidi/adoptive brother Wei Wuxian. She is not just a sister but also very maternal to them, as her parents are not the best. She is also the mother of Jin Ling, but sadly died before she could raise him. Her husband, Jin Zixuan, died in a confrontation with Wei Wuxian, but she did not blame him and even sacrificed herself for him. She would've made the best mother to Jin Ling, just as she was the best sister to Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian. She also makes the best soup ever. I would die to taste her soup. Then I would come back to life because that's how much the soup nurtures you. 

Jian Lan from Heaven Official’s Blessing / TGCF

Submission: She has unconditional love for her very disgusting and disturbing undead fetus child. That's a mother right there. 

Wiki Link

Ling Wen from Heaven Official’s Blessing / TGCF

[No Propaganda Submitted] 

One of the Three Tumors - three Heavenly Officials that have some of the worst reputations after Xie Lian (“the laughing stock of the three realms”) - and was accused of, like, killing a dude or smth but was accepted back into Heaven on the sole basis that she’s the only administratively competent god

Liu Mingyan from The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System

Submission: Head disciple of Xian Shu Peak. Said to be so beautiful she wears a veil over her face so as to not distract others. Writes popular erotic fanfiction about her older brother's shixiong/her shibo and his male disciple. 

Luo Qingyang (Mianmian) from Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation

Submission: She stood up against a whole bunch of powerful men and dared to speak a different opinion. Then she just up and left the cultivation world because she had no more time for their bullshit. At the end of the novel, she's a rogue cultivator married to a former merchant with her own daughter named Mianmian. We should all be like her. 

Mod Propaganda: 

Highly principled and strong-willed. Immediately left her clan after they mocked her for supposedly having feelings for Wei Wuxian when she literally just mentioned he didn't kill indiscriminately. Now living her best life as a rogue cultivator with her husband and child.

She saw the injustice of her own clan firsthand and decided, “I'm not going to be a part of this. You're not listening to me, so fuck y'all.” And honestly, based. 

Wiki Link

Ning Yingying from The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System 

Submission: She goes through great character development. At first, she's dense and kind of annoying, even a little selfish. But she grows up to be a strong, intelligent, and intuitive woman. 

Additional Propaganda

Sha Hualing from The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System

Submission 1: I can't stand her and yet I love her. What does that tell you? 

Submission 2: her cringefail losergirl swag <3 girlie constantly in situations and she put herself into most of them 

Mod Propaganda

A fierce demon who attacked the Cang Qiong Mountain sect in SVSSS and became one of Luo Binghe’s wives in Proud Immortal Demon Way who often fought with Liu Mingyan and Qin Wanyue

My fav description of her is something along the lines of, “trying to be the steal-your-man girl who fails about it so badly” 

She’s ambitious, she’s ruthless, she’s intelligent -  If you support women’s rights, you should also support women’s wrongs (/light-hearted) 

Su Xiyan from The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System

[No propaganda submitted]

Additional Propaganda #1

Additional Propaganda #2

Wen Qing from Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation

Submission: She is everything! She doesn't get enough screen time in the novel, but that proves just how amazing she is to make such an impression in spite of it. She is a great big sister, to both her brother Wen Ning and the protagonist Wei Wuxian. She is stern but kind. She's a doctor. She throws needles at people. She's everything! 

Previous Propaganda (MXTX Side Characters Tournament):

Submission 1: Doctor, mad scientist, war criminal, protective big sister... she has the range!! Submission 2: Wen Qing my beloved!! She did surgery on a grape. Mad genius for real. Also a loving sister with a very sharp tongue and maybe no sense of how far is too far. Can't wait for them to find her alive in a Koi Tower basement! Submission 3: Justice for my girl!!!!  Submission 4: She's bitchy and pragmatic and cares deeply and did an unprecedented operation (experimental and nonconsensual!), what's not to love? Also she deserved better. 

Yushi Huang from Heaven Official’s Blessing / TGCF

Submission: She slit her own throat to save her country. She's very compassionate and always willing to help others. She also gives people vegetables. 

Additional Propaganda: 

Additional propaganda for Yushi Huang:  She's so competent that she's got the womanzier of the series consistently on the back foot, and she doesn't even care to notice.  She's here to dish out rain and that's it.     

[helluva-bored-critical]

A Quick Review Of Helluva Shorts #4: Chupacabras

Hey everyone, helluva bored critical here to give a review of the newest HB short; CHUPACABRAS. I'll do my best to cover the plot, the goods and the bads, and to give my two cents.

First off, the composition of the title card is a bit awkward; the flashy text of "CHUPACABRAS" reminiscent of Mexican culture clash with the duller tones of the background, making it less appealing. If a different screencap was chosen, such as this:

I think the text would've fit better.

However, the plot premise is pretty good, let me talk about that if you haven't seen it yet; I.M.P. head out to kill a client, but they're surrounded by a hoard of goats and they try to clear 'em out. The client, Gerardo, wakes due to the ruckus, and Blitz is captured and mistaken for a chupacabra.

Note: the folklore of the chupacabra originates from Puerto Rico, though sightings of it have spread to Mexico and other parts of Latin America. Mexicans do know about chupacabra, but it's commonly misinterpreted as being of Mexican origin.

In Mexico, if I'm not mistaken, the chupacabra looks similar to a mangy coyote. Blitz is wearing more goat-like rags, which isn't entirely accurate.

Anyways, Gerardo has taken Blitz's gun and crystal, so he's unable to break out of his sitch.

The D.H.O.R.K.S., getting word of a "chupacabra" in Tijuana, head to Gerardo's display, where he's chargin' 100 pesos per view. The agent duo gets into a funny squabble about payment, and the tiny black goat that you see in the image above, meanwhile, heads over to Blitz. Blitz bribes it with a nice slice of cheese to help him out.

Gerardo is close to shooting up the D.H.O.R.K.S with Blitz's gun, but since it's demonic, it burns his hand and leads to an improbably catastrophe bullet ricochet that kills him.

The goat retrieves Blitz's crystal; Blitz and the D.H.O.R.K.S. make a hasty escape, and the episode ends with the small goat beginning its Cult of the Lamb arc :).

What was good:

Moxxie and Blitz's interaction at the beginning is a good joke, it got a chuckle out of me:

"I want to say these are Earth goats, sir." "I don't care how great they are, they are In. My. Way!"

The Hispanic voice actors did an awesome job.

The music is energetic and fun.

D.H.O.R.K.S. and Gerardo's interaction is well-executed, it was my favorite joke of the short.

Blitz's escape is well-animated and he looks like a rascal.

Background jokes, such as Agent #1's badge saying "Insert Text Here".

The art of the final shot, where the goat is ruling over its disciples in a candle-lit shed, has great composition and lighting. Whichever artists created this shot, you executed it damn well.

Along with this, the shot of Gerardo's house is beautiful.

The beginning frenzy was entertaining. I liked the shot of Blitz shooting like a madman:

What could've improved:

Millie had no lines in this short, despite being present in it. I wish she did; being a farm girl, she could've had some quick commentary 'bout the place or interact with Moxxie a bit.

Blitz's swearing in this short can drag on a bit. He's a crude imp, but some of the jokes just got the punchline of a swear. They could be crafted better.

As mentioned in the beginning, the title card could use some work.

Also mentioned, how the chupacabra is represented isn't accurate. I'm no expert though; if you're reading this and wanna counter me, I'm alright with that.

Other comments/opinions:

The pesos ain't exactly accurate, but they get the main idea across.

I ain't a fan of HB humor to be honest, but I won't fault you if you like it.

I.M.P. missions are starting to get restricted to shorts, which I'm not a particular fan of either. The show was originally advertised as a hitman dark comedy, but its main plot has changed to something that I can no longer be invested in.

I appreciate the background team and the music composer, Alexander Arntzen. I'm a big sucker for art.

Overall rating: 6/10 or 7/10. Nothing too spectacular, but it's pretty cool! Let me know what you thought of the short in the comments.

[mxtxfanatic]

Jc stans whining about being bullied out of the fandom when they should have been bullied out of the Wei Wuxian’s wiki:

Or Jiang Cheng’s wiki:

Or the official release of the novel like:

when it said that Jiang Fengmian showed favoritism towards Wei Wuxian over Jiang Cheng in the character descriptions

when it reworked the section where the novel says Jiang Cheng "has no love in him"

when they were omitting lines of text that reflected unfavorably on Jiang Cheng (just one example of this happening in one of the volumes).

Slick diction will get you every time if you don't stop to think about why the writer has chosen a specific word choice. Whoever's been doing the bullying has obviously not been doing a good job. Explanations with evidence under the cut:

Jiang Cheng doesn't "insist" on carrying Wei Wuxian; Wei Wuxian is carried onto him and he carries him out because he thinks Wei Wuxian's reaction to the pain will make him look bad:

After the beating finished, Lan WangJi silently stood up and walked outside after saluting toward the the disciples in the ancestral hall, showing no evidence that he had been injured. Wei WuXian was the exact opposite. After he was carried onto Jiang Cheng’s back, he groaned for the whole way. ... (break where wwx is explaining why he was punished to the others) "...Jiang Cheng, walk slower. You’re almost shaking me off.” Jiang Cheng wanted to not only shake him off, but, even more so, to make a few man-shaped dents on the ground by slamming his head down, “Is simply carrying you not up to your standards?!” Wei WuXian, “I never asked you to carry me, in the beginning.” Jiang Cheng was enraged, “If I don’t carry you, you’d probably stay in their ancestral hall and roll on the ground all day long. I don’t have that thick of a face to lose! Lan WangJi even had fifty more strikes than you, and he even walked by himself. Yet, you have the nerve to pretend that you’re crippled. I don’t want to carry you any more. Get off, now!” Wei WuXian, “No, I’m wounded.”

—Chapt. 18: Refinement, exr

Wei Wuxian doesn't "insist" on being Jiang Cheng's subordinate. He is giving Jiang Cheng a pep talk about how he will never replace him after Madam Yu accuses him of being Jiang Fengmian's bastard child in front of Jiang Cheng:

Jiang Cheng was stuck between his father and his mother. After a moment of hesitation, he moved to his mother’s side. Holding his shoulders, Madam Yu pushed him forward for Jiang FengMian to see, “Sect Leader Jiang, it seems that some things I have to say. Look carefully—this, is your own son, the future head of Lotus Pier. Even if you frown upon him just because I was the one who bore him, his surname is still Jiang! ... I don’t believe for one second that you haven’t heard of how the outside people gossips, that Sect Leader Jiang has still not moved on from a certain Sanren though so many years have passed, regarding the son of his old friend as a son of his own; they’re speculating if Wei Ying is your...” ... [Wei Wuxian] hopped off the fence, “And, who said that being a sect leader means that you have to go along with the style of the sect? There have been so many sect leaders in the YunmengJiang Sect, I don’t believe at all that everyone was the same. Even the GusuLan Sect had an outlier like Lan Yi, but who would deny her position and her abilities? When talking about the famous cultivators of the Lan Sect, who could skip over her? Who could skip over her Chord Assassination technique?” Jiang Cheng was silent, as though he had finally become calmer. Wei WuXian put his hand on his shoulder again, “In the future, you’ll be the sect leader, and I’ll be your subordinate, like your father and my father. So what if the GusuLan Sect has its Two Jades? The Yunmeng Jiang Sect will have its Two Prides! So, shut up. Who said that you don’t deserve to be the sect leader? Nobody can say this, even you can’t either. If you do you’re looking for a beating.”

—Chapt. 56: Poisons, exr

Wei Wuxian doesn't "insist" on giving his golden core to Jiang Cheng. He is coerced into it by the debt invoked by the Jiang leaders before their deaths to protect Jiang Cheng with his life, and at that moment, Jiang Cheng was determined to die if he had to live without a golden core:

Wei WuXian, “Do you really want to die?” Jiang Cheng, “I can’t seek revenge even when I’m alive. Why shouldn’t I die? Maybe I’ll be able to turn into a ferocious ghost.” Wei WuXian, “You’ve been undergoing soul-calming ceremonies ever since you were young. You won’t be able to turn into a ferocious ghost even after you die.” Jiang Cheng, “If I can’t seek revenge no matter if I’m dead or alive, then what’s the difference between the two?” After he said this, he wouldn’t speak again no matter what. Wei WuXian sat by the bed. He looked at him for a while. Slapping his knees, he stood up and began to busy himself. When evening came, he had finally finished making a meal. He placed everything onto the table, “Get up. It’s time for dinner.” Of course, Jiang Cheng ignored him. Wei WuXian sat in front of the table. He picked up his own chopsticks, “If you don’t replenish your strength, how can we go take back your golden core?”

—Chapt. 60: Poisons, exr

Jiang Cheng doesn't return Chenqing "once the truth of his golden core is revealed." He returns it mid-battle because Wei Wuxian's whistling wasn't strong enough to effectively contain Nie Mingjue's corpse. After the battle, he simply doesn't demand it back.

Lan XiChen turned the direction in which his blade pointed, while Wei WuXian and Lan WangJi sped up their melodies as well. But the effects of the whistle had already been overcome. It would be much harder than before for it to take effect again. At this point, somebody on the side suddenly called, “Wei WuXian!” Wei WuXian answered immediately, “What?” Only after he answered did he realize that the one who called him was Jiang Cheng. Wei WuXian felt somewhat surprised. Jiang Cheng didn’t respond directly. Instead, he took something out from his sleeve and tossed. Wei WuXian caught it by instinct and looked, only to find a black, gleaming flute along with a crimson tassel. It was the ghoul flute, Chen Qing! ... Remembering that Jiang Cheng was the one who brought it, he turned over there and commented casually, “Thanks.” He waved Chenqing, “I’ll... be keeping this?” Jiang Cheng glanced at him, “It was yours in the first place.”

—Chapt. 108, exr

Jiang Cheng didn't "feel gratitude" towards the Wen siblings for saving and protecting him. He owed them gratitude due to his life debt and for a debt for aiding him in reclaiming his parents' bodies and home. He repays neither:

Jiang Cheng’s brows were knitted. He rubbed the vein that throbbed at his temple and soundlessly took in a deep breath, “... I apologize to all of the Sect Leaders. Everyone, I’m afraid you don’t know that the Wen cultivator whom Wei WuXian wanted to save was called Wen Ning. We owe him and his sister Wen Qing gratitude for what happened during the Sunshot Campaign.”

...

With Sandu, he pointed at Wen Ning who lay on the ground, “The only way of making up for things is for us to end things before they get the chance to!” Wei WuXian, “End what?” Jiang Cheng, “You burn this corpse right now and return to them all these leftovers of the Wen Sect. That’s the only way to make the subject die!” As he spoke, he raised his sword again, preparing to attack. However, Wei WuXian clenched his wrist, “Are you joking?! If we return Wen Qing and the others to them, they’d meet nothing but a dead end!” Jiang Cheng, “I doubt you’ll even return all of them. Why do you care what kind of end they meet? A dead end it is, then—what does it have to do with you?!”

—Chapt. 73: Recklessness, exr

Jiang Cheng forgives Jin Zixuan because he wants an alliance with the Jin Clan, and his sister's marriage is his bargaining chip.

All the times Jiang Cheng has physically assaulted Jin Ling, along with how the boy views his uncle