#that's how different these dreams can be
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Gonna walk into my appointment tomorrow and ask my therapist if she has any ideas as to why lately I only have good dreams when I make myself stay up way past the point of exhaustion compared to the violent nightmares I have when I go to bed at a "reasonable" time.
#seriously though#last night i dreamt of swimming with jelly fish#and petting a skunk that had it's light colored fur dyed the bisexual colors#violence tw#if you choose to read further#last week i had a dream about a zombie apocalypse#and a family having made it to the safe haven minus one dad and with a bitten baby#as a mercy the baby had his head smashed in before being tossed into a giant human blender#where all zombie infected people were thrown#i couldn't sleep after that#my brain hid no detail from me#very graphic in all ways#that's how different these dreams can be#the first one with the animals being forced exhaustion#the zombie BS being what happens when I'm trying to take care of myself#i can't keep doing this#lack of sleep is making my anxiety way worse
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
ONCE UPON A TIME, THERE WAS A KNIGHT...
the visual inspiration for this was a combination of Frederic William Burton's Meeting on the Turret Stairs and also Bernardo Cavallino's The vision of St. Dominic receiving the Rosary from the Virgin
this was supposed to be just a one off illustration to get the thoughts out of my system, but then I started thinking about medieval politics and warfare and plagues and a castle and home as both a place of refuge, a prison, and a tomb, so perhaps they will end up as ex voto characters as well.
you may say, hey! that rosary looks like it has too many beads! it's a fifteen decade rosary, probably. dominicans are really into marian devotions. it works out.
also. spiral style stair cases. oh boy. it was that unexpectedly more difficult than I originally thought it would be to draw. the more I think about it, the less I understand them, even though I had a million photos of the stairs in front of me while I was drawing it.
⭐ I have a tip jar (ko-fi)!
⭐ and other places I’m at! bsky / pixiv / pillowfort /cohost / cara.app
#the economy and my bank account are in shambles and i ended up stress drawing this whole thing in one go#its so many lines. the next time i draw this. because i will be revisiting this composition. i want to use a different inking brush#i think. but the next time i draw this it will be with solid blacks on the stair case steps i think#hey here's a fun fact for those of you who aren't catholic. did you know that kissing the ring of the pope/a cardinal/etc#grants you an indulgence. cardinals also used to kiss the pope on the mouth. also foot and hand iirc. anyway#there are no cardinals in this drawing but im saying if you write medieval/renaissance smut about men of the cloth#you can really amp up the friction between holy and seductive with a lot of the (gestures vaguely) that.#actually another fun fact about cardinals. their fun sun hat (it's called a galero) has some fucking weird as hell fever dream (literally)#origin lore. so if seductive isn't your thing. the horror of a thing that you wear is also extremely fun#esp when you get into medieval gender performances of clothes and how they define a person etc#generic medieval tag#original tag
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
A thing I've never heard talked about but is so down right poetic as a wyllstarion concept is that the park right outside Cazadors was the one Wyll played in pretending to kill monsters when he was a kid...
#baldur's gate 3#bg3#wyll ravengard#wyllstarion#bloodpact#astarion#wyll x astarion#bg3 wyll#bg3 astarion#cazador szarr#just the drama of that. baby wyll playing at killing monsters right next to a den of them#one astarion says he visited as a spawn at night#baby wyll dreaming of killing monsters next door to the place the monster he will fall in love with is currently imprisoned#by one of the worst monsters you can imagine#he even has a line to shadowheart about how the difference between the ones he dreamt of fighting and the ones he faced as the blade#were that the worst monsters look like you and I#and Cazdor is right fucking there!!!!!#he also has one with astarion where astarion says its less kitschy at night which is just funny#but like SEE MY VISION#baby wyll staying out to late one night in the park and playing monster hunter but then seeing a glimpse of red eyes and fangs...
376 notes
·
View notes
Text
☀︎ + ☾ Happy birthday, @sacchar1111ne <3
Dream & Nightmare by jokublog
#zu art#dreammare#dream!sans#nightmare!sans#birthday#undertale#undertale au#utmv#keep doing what you like!╰(*´︶`*)╯♡#that's what makes you /you/ ★#*・゜゚・*:.。..。.:*・''・*:.。. .。.:*・゜゚・*#while drawing I was thinking about how the earrings were held#and the most realistic explanation is drilling into the skull? :'D#sort of a hole which you can screw different earrings into??#beauty requires sacrifice x)#UPD there was also an eclipse today?? \(//∇//)\ truly symbolic <3
825 notes
·
View notes
Text
Dream worm...
(og idea bellow ,It was so funny i needed to draw it)
#dreamling#the sandman#dream of the endless#hob gadling#i would love him if he was a worm#I can imagine Dream habitually asking Hob if he would love him if he was a totally different thing every time he asks#clearly. patient and devoted Hob would say yes every time#and would stay thinking at night how it would influence their relationship if Dream were a mouse or a shoe#alot to think about#my art#edited because this shit got mixed up tfw
3K notes
·
View notes
Text
Just had a thought:
Jumping off off the moments where izuku tried to talk to his peers, Aoyama leaving, feeling like he failed Tenko, losing OFA, and feeling overall disconnected suddenly(at least, we can read between the lines that he is) from his peers and even from his dream...
What if this epilogue includes Izuku considering LEAVING UA? Has anyone else had the thought that he may end up there?
The logic being that once he has no Quirk, he won't fit into the Hero course. And if he represses all of these emotions like we think he is, he might take that to mean that he doesn't deserve a spot in the Hero course, and have the idea to withdraw.
Obviously this all needs to pan out BUT what if this thing with his friends almost blowing him off, just kind of adds to that negative feeling? Like makes him feel a certain way, like they're already moving on without him?
So he comes to a conclusion that maybe he should withdraw. His friends react of course as you expect they would, likely being shocked and sad, but also knowing hes going through a lot, and so trying to be supportive no matter what? They tell him "hey you dont have to, you have a place with us", but ultimately will support his decision without fighting him too hard, as the case with Aoyama seems to be...but it's REALLY KATSUKI who takes it home. Who NEEDS to take it home, and say what the others won't.
It's Katsuki who confronts him, and has to talk him down from the idea.
And what if that's how we get a Kacchan v Deku 3? Which does not have to be, and really needn't be a literal fight.
It just needs to be that long awaited airing out of all of the unspoken feelings, mainly Izukus feelings of failure (failing to protect Katsuki during the war, failing to save Tomura/Tenko, failing to even hold on to his own dream, ie OFA) and what it all means for his future.
How he thinks logically, if his quirk runs out eventually, he can't be Quirkless in the Hero class. How that dashes all hopes of staying a Pro Hero in the future...
Maybe even what he is thinking about society and pro heroism as a whole now!
Katsukis got to convince him that He is a hero, deserves to be a hero more than anyone. Maybe even concedes that even if the dream of being a hero traditionally speaking has changed, there are so many other ways he can continue making a difference.
How much of a difference he has already made.
And that is when it gets personal, and katsuki confesses further, "you've made all the difference in the world to me already" or something. Maybe spills some more sentimental feelings. Maybe Izuku finally spills some of his, maybe we get a hand hold and or an embrace....
And katsuki makes him promise that he won't give up yet. And if he has to leave the Hero course, he switch to one of the other courses in UA to continue his dream in another route. And promising to be with him every step of the way.
And maybe idk, suggesting they be Hero Partners and open an agency together or something romantic like that. Lmao.
Throw in maybe a little bit of spice somewhere about Katsuki getting worked up and Izuku having a moment of worry about his heart/health and Katsuki retorting that his heart is fine and not to derail their conversation by "worrying about my stupid heart"
Bonus points if there are tears involved, there usually are lol.
#bnha spoilers#bakudeku#bkdk#bakugou katsuki#izuku midoriya#what if though#late night thoughts#epilogue speculation#kacchan crying as he tells izuku how much of a difference hes made in his life would be splendid#kacchan crying as he begs izuku not to go#just kacchan crying bc ylhe usually does in the deku v kacchan chapters#i like the idea especially of kacchan telling Izu he doesnt have to leave ua#he can just switch course and still be there#and still live his dream in a different way#i think that would be SO GOOD#considering what he was like a the beginning#encouraging izu and suggesting alternatives that keep them together#oof#the angst and drama#but also the hopefulness in the message#horikoshi i am outside your window
217 notes
·
View notes
Text
special Q&A with Jin via TikTok click on the source to send your questions to seokjin ♡
#jin#seokjin#kim seokjin#bts#bangtan#btsedit#btsgif#dailybts#useremmeline#userdimple#usersky#raplineuser#im gonna ask him what his fav track is and how his process differ from album making in bangtan vs solo#and if he can visit me in my dreams and in my house too idk idk#fiz.gif
126 notes
·
View notes
Text
Ok, I recently wrote an essay [here] talking about the definition and duties of civil engineering as well as the ethics because of the brain rot @swordfright gave me with calling Dream Sam’s ultimate engineering project. So, because I actually am a civil engineer I took it upon myself to design the title and summary of quantities sheets just like I do at work for roads but with Dream as the project instead. And in honor of angst day sponsored by @sixteenth-day-event, I figured I’d share it because I feel like it kinda works for the prison of the mind prompt.
“Sam’s “ultimate engineering project” he deemed too damaged like a bumpy road or crumbling building that wasn’t worthy of patching and filling in the cracks or reinforcing, that’s too eroded to be fixed and preserved. So, Sam strived to tear him down to the bedrock so he could remake, remold, and reengineer Dream according to his design for the common safety, public health and well-fair.”
{These are very similar to the actual sheets I make day to day, which I shall not share for the sake of doxing my location, but yea pretty much everything has a significance. Some of it doesn’t necessarily make sense but that was because I was more so taking inventory of what we see in lore (so you know I counted ;) lol)}
#sixteenthdayevent#AAANNNNNGGST#Ah and now you see why I’ve been digging up all the prison lore and inventories ;D…. my brain rot is too powerful#still never got wardens torment enchants though :( did for the shovel and how which I’ll now have to write torture scenes for…#so ummm stay tuned for that in Misery Loves An Idiot… Dream going to have lots of fun I’m sure >:)#c!dream#dsmp#dreblr#dream smp#dsmp dream#dsmp analysis#dsmpblr#prison arc#dsmp art#pandora’s vault has a singular purpose#flora favs#pandora’s vault#c!dream fanart#flora does art apparently#ah Sam… such a good engineer… if only he realized Dream was a person not a condemned structure oof#if y’all are curious enough I might share a irl work example with different numbers and stuff but didn’t want to bore you XD#happy angst day :)… wait isn’t that everyday? lol#can we talk about how I’ve done all of these prompts as descriptions of metaphors and stuff kinda funny#civil engineering
298 notes
·
View notes
Text
Another year, here we go!
(prints here)
some wip shots since I know some people like seeing them!
meant to take more screenshots, but ended up super busy and forgot once I came back after a few months, whoops. Making the iceberg itself was super fun!
#happy to be done with this one#started it in like may and then moved states#and everything else in my life happened#the crack gave me hell it was totally different for a while there#wanted to put some red into this one but couldnt figure out how#someday i'll work in colors that arent all blue or all red#maybe green or purple someday#one can dream#i think this year im not gonna do a poster series with a theme#doing the entire pacific division was such a fun challenge and made me be really creative#but hot damn do i get like less than any ideas with the central division#so i think this year im just gonna draw whatever i think is baller#and it wont be connected to the games at all#just fish#anyways#my art#seattle kraken#seattle#nhl#hockey art#hockey#kraken
119 notes
·
View notes
Text
dream visit (nostalgia) - a 2nd anniversary katfl comic
#wooo wooo yayyyy uayyy happy anniversary#happy birthday elfilin and elfilis my beloveds#kirby#elfilin#fecto elfilis#idk if i should tag this as forgo#katfl#LOTS of talking abt this piece in the tags below#i wanted to do some kinda thing and I got this idea for a comic#so i just kinda went in and did it messy#not really worrying too much about how it looked#and I like how it came out I think#even if elfilin looks kinda bad at some parts#kind of a sequel to my old dream visit post?#that one I gave elfilis/forgo the tunic script but I didn’t feel like doing it this time#this one i was kinda thinking about like. ok#identity and stuff and how it differs for them#i know forgo and elfilis are 2 separate entities#but i like drawing elfilis#so i think in this dream scenario where they can kinda be whatever#they’d show themself as elfilis#because that’s what they are trying to become again anyways#and really elfilin is only a small part of the whole#so forgo IS far more ‘elfilis’ than elfilin would be#similarly they just keep saying ‘i’ whereas elfilin sees that form and thinks ‘we’#forgo being kind of self centered: they don’t need elfilin to achieve their goals#that being destruction which elfilin would inhibit#except they do to actually become elfilis again#idk whatever I should stop talking#wybs art
256 notes
·
View notes
Text
the character inspo posts had me thinking about yuuna during twst and pre-twst (in their original world specifically) so uh here's a comparison:
#to my (few) yuuna fans 😔💪💕#new challenge do this with your yuus/mcs/ocs-#i'll do one for yuusha later ehe#depending on my motivation probably RIGHT after this lmao#[—✦-#-✧ my art#twst art#twisted wonderland#twst#twst yuu#twst yuusona#(💝) yuuna#-✦—]#TAG LORE RAMBLING TIME—#thinking about how yuuna prob gets visions of themself pre twst too#yuuna sees themselves being so cruel to a friend/classmate#and they cant do anything but watch thinking-#that cant be them#can it??#why would they be so mean#that’s not them at all#it’s just a nightmare#it’s not real#their dreams had been so weird so far#why is this one any different
146 notes
·
View notes
Text
dsmp is still SO insane to me. still not completely convinced it wasn't a social experiment. it is something that can never be replicated again due to the really specific circumstances that attributed to it's creation and popularity
#the combination of everyone being inside due to the pandemic#the community giving everyone a space to connect#in a time where loneliness and mental health was reaching an all time high especially among youth#like idk. even after everything and a handful of ccs being revealed to be horrible shitbags#the dsmp will ALWAYS hold a special place in my heart.#a story told in a medium no one has really explored before#the unique fantasy setting......the three life system allowing for more high stakes moments since there a character#could die multiple times to raise stakes#the emphasis placed on familial and platonic dynamics and how THEY can be just as complex and entertaining to watch/read abt like /r ships#the fandom revolutionizing gen fics and making a familial relationship reach the TOP OF AO3 STATS ONE YEAR???? insanity.#also just the ppl.#the amount of talented musicians and artists and writers and editors and all the ppl who lovingly transcripted and compiled lore streams#LIKE UGH.#im so emo about it#unfiltered queer representation bcuz#the story wasnt washed down by a corporation as it was given directly from the storytellers to the audience#the multiple povs allowing ppl to experience the same story in completely different ways#excellent depictions of the effects of mental illness/ptsd and 'imperfect' abuse survivors#ctommy my beloved#LIKE SIGH. WE ARE NEVER GETTING THAT AGAIN IN A FANDOM SPACE I FEAR#ok lol. ignore my rantings#dsmp#dream smp#starry text
126 notes
·
View notes
Text
the company i work for decided that its switching from the german formal "You"(Sie) to the informal "you" (Du) in all of our websites so now we have to scour the entire database to change it and i quite frankly hate that, not just bc the unecessary extra work but especially bc its such a weird and unecessary change
i bet its bc everything here is getting englishfied (both literally and culturally it feels like, when my new boss talks its half in english bc every second german word is just replaced by an english one despite there being perfectly fine words for it in german too, its so annoying) and bc they want to sound more personal in hopes of getting more clients bc 'company is your fwiend uwu!!', i know this here is the amercian tm site so you wouldnt understand really but i do not want to be greeted with 'du' by companies, no, thats too personal, you dont know me and im not giving you my data, stay away!!
i guess thats how i would describe it .. the formal you is like a polite distance, like someone you dont know staying outside your personal space, but when its the informal 'you' it feels invasive unless i told you you can call me that, and that goes double for companies
maybe its a small thing that doesnt seem important but i cant stand it, im just a little part time worker doing data work so i got no say in it but the companies founder also announced hes giving his post to his kids some time ago so ...... since then theres been alot of changes and new projects that solely aim to imitate whats popular and whats done by other companies, despite ours being one that is, or used to be, intentionally different, like, that was the POINT, but i guess chasing trends is just too appealing for CEOs
#ganondoodles talks#personal#rare personal rant#theres more and more changes that feel so weirdly forced#like man#i thought being different was the whole point#like climate and ethics are .. or were .. the core idea and now i guess its just fine to do whatever conventional companies are doing#yeah woohoo lets also do an app thing that forces people to sign up if they want reasonable prices!#smartphones the standard everwhere!#who needs anything physical if you can put it in an a phone so syphon off data directly out of people fingertips!! yea!!!#lets use AI pitcures bc we refuse to hire more graphic desingers and they are jsut so overworked uwu#climate? ethic? whats that#argh#sorry this needed to get out#recently had a stupid conversation with a coworker bc i asked them why we are okay with AI shit now when it goes against what this-#company was presumably founded on#and he was rly defensive and said welll we dont have time and its cheap and also maybe we should got WITH the time#like that last thing especially pissed me tf off#but i cant afford to lose this job#im starting to hate it more though so the dream of being able to stay like this might not be real#i cant get a job in this place that is as nice to my mental health so idk man#i wish i was good enough at merch and online stuff so i could live of that#but even trying to find out how taxes work on that stuff is a nightmare to me
89 notes
·
View notes
Text
Do you think. That after Sanji asked Zoro to kill him. He took a moment wonder if, had Kuina lived to adulthood, at the end of their journey, would whoever killed Mihawk first have to fight the other to protect their title? Do you think the next time they fought after Sanji’s request, Kitetsu would cut just a little too close to Sanji’s throat, because her master was too preoccupied thinking, would I have been able to do it? Kill her, if it came to that? For my dream? and later when he’s carefully wiping Sanji’s blood off his blade, do you think, that maybe he would think- the dream was hers before it was mine. Would I have felt betrayed, then, if she killed me? Or proud? Pleased? Happy?
When Sanji interrupts his thoughts to say, what the hell has got you so distracted? Am I too boring for you to take seriously? do you think Zoro would glare at him in silence cause there’s no way for him to articulate that he’s never taken anything more seriously in his life.
#Sanji and Kuina taking up the same space in Zoro’s brain my absolute beloved.#Like yeah there’s also a parallel you can make between Kuina and Luffy in how they represent Zoro’s dreams but#Their dynamic as friends is different#Zoro is able to communicate rather freely with Luffy#With Sanji its more of the same thrown insults and play fights and secret admiration and inability to say the word ‘friend’#and now I’m thinking about how Kuina died the same night her and Zoro spoke honestly for the first time#and I wonder if Zoro regrets that#I WONDER if he didnt realize he has a second chance at fixing it until Sanji’s life was placed in real danger#This is all so hard for me to articulate does anyone get it. Hello. Hello?#one piece#roronoa zoro#blackleg sanji#shimotsuki kuina#zosan#cause a death pact is always romantic#my post
151 notes
·
View notes
Text
Doodle from the 4th whiteboard that exploded a week ago that I'm proud of :>
Close up
-lyrics in order in undercut:
I can see it in your smile and in your eyes
There's no compassion, no there's nothing left inside
Over and over no you're never satisfied
Made your decision now you're gonna have a bad time
I see your mind now it's slipping faster
Kill or be killed only thing that matters
Across the land all their ashes scatter
Who's the monster now?
#doai#dreams of an insomniac#alex williams doai#clyde doai#doai sitcom au#this was based on the betrayal ending as i thought of the song#but I'm starting to think and theorize that the 'Dangerous somebody' Alex's mentions in the volume is Clyde#this person is considered dangerous by Lankmann and Alex said they put research into it and the Eastridge demon is known around Eastridge#doesn't explain how Alex got into contact with it but maybe there's a possibility that Clyde in doai can be reasoned with?#deal with the devil kind of shit#there's also the possibility of Simon but when i heard Alex say 'Research' I don't think Simon would have a facebook account for this case#or it's maybe an entirely different character we have yet to see who knows what Pastra is cooking#I'm not that confident in this theory so I'm just hiding it in tags#end of that i guess jskjdjjss
144 notes
·
View notes
Text
RealAgeAU Drabble - Reminiscene
Hello everyone :3
You all know what time it is!! I think... It is time for another Dream drabble :3 @spotaus I know how much you like having dream be put through the ringer :33
First drabble Prev drabble Next drabble
Not much to say this time. You guys ready?
*-------------------------*
All things considered? Dream had been doing okay lately.
The worst part was that he wasn't sure if he felt good or bad about it.
At least Core didn't call him every 5 minutes anymore. Seems like the outcode child finally accepted that Dream had changed. That Dream had moved on.
Hah.
If only they knew how little he had actually moved on.
Dream stands in the greyed out forest. Waiting and listening. Not even a slight breeze. No sound.
A dead AU.
He used to blame Nightmare for that, for killing their AU.
Nowadays?
Dream figures it was just the end of their AU.
Dream leans against a tree and sighs. He tries to reach out but no sounds.
On his solo trips and, as Blue liked to call them, self discovery trips. Dream had learned he could speak to trees. Though maybe calling it speaking was a bit generous.
The trees didn't use words. Just sounds and whistles and whispers that could almost have been words. Dream had still been able to understand however. He just had to listen.
Seems like that was a theme for him. He just had to listen to be able to understand.
Even so, he takes a deep breath and leaves the forest and walks towards a familiar hill.
He kept returning here. Dream wants to say he doesn't know why and that it is just his home calling back for him.
He knows the truth.
He stops by the old cut down stump and focusses on the two familiar graves.
Seems like he hadn't been the only one visiting. There are once again fresh flowers. All beautifull yellows and orange coloured this time.
Dream smiles as he sits by the graves and gently touches the flowers. Part of his soul grieves at the two graves, once of which is meant for him. But another part of his soul sings in joy.
Because there is only one monster who could have made these graves and left these flowers.
Dream chuckles as he glances at the stump "Nighty came by... didn't he?"
No answer of course. Nim has died a long time ago. Even so Dream leans back against the stump as he keeps looking at the graves, most of his focus is on his own.
Dream keeps staring at the graves as he speaks "I know you won't answer me... with you being gone.. But... I want to at least think you are listening to me. Just this once."
Nim never listened to him. Neither to Nighty. They just had to listen to her.
Look at where that lead them.
Dream watches over the grey fields and the village in the distance. "Had you already decided near the start? Which one of us you would love and which one you wouldn't?"
No answer but Dream didn't mind. He watches the village in the distance. He can't help but wonder how often Nightmare would have had to do this alone. Keep watch alone.
"Or was it an in the moment decision? Had there been a moment were you held both of us and loved us both? Or had you decided the moment Nightmare formed that you would hate him?"
How often Dream would rush off, ignoring the quiet pleas to stay wiht Nightmare.
"I think you decided from the start. Why else would you give him the name you did? Say the only thing that matters about him is how he was different from me."
Would he have seen those angry people coming? With weapons? Had Nightmare been afraid? Wondering where Dream had been? Why Dream hadn't stopped them?
"It has to be the reason. Why else would you tell me to make friends with the villagers and help them? While telling Nightmare to stay put and send them away? You must have known. Known that by making me help them and by making Nightmare deny them that they would grow angry with him."
How often had Nightmare believed Dream had abandoned him? Only for him to end up mortally injured?
"You don't deserve the grave he made." Not that Dream thinks he truly deserves one himself. Even if he returns each time to see if new flowers are left for him.
Dream once again wonders if he should leave a message for the next time Nighty visits... Just something that he wishes to talk.
But then that ever present fear returns. What if it meant Nightmare wouldn't visit this place anymore instead of answering? What if he decided it was better to completely cut their past lose from him instead?
Dream hugs his legs as he tries to remember how colourful everything had been. How beautiful it had been.
But... Dream now realises that it had just been a prison of responsibility... For both him and his brother.
A golden cage... but still a cage.
Drema snorts as he nudges Nim's grave "Yet here you are! immortalised by a grave your son made you! You know. That same son you aparently never liekd or wanted? That son made you a grave and keeps said grave clean and brings you flowers. I bet you wouldn't even be thankful for it."
Dream knocks the stump with his fist "After all! How often did you tell me that I should focus on myself? How i should focus on making the villagers like me? How i shouldn't bother to wait for Nighty to return from the river?" Nim had been trying to seperate them from the start. A dream had never realised.
Dream sighs as he hugs his legs "We were children. Little babybones and you gave us adult responsibilities...." They should have just ran. the two of them should have just disappeared into the forest.
Nighty had asked him a few times if they couldn't just leave together.
Dream should have realised something was seriously wrong. Nighty had been the one who took their jobs so seriously.
But... Dream had just said he didn't want to leave his friends in the village behind.
"I wish i could turn back time... get a redo... I would stay by Nightmare's side. I would convince him that the job you gave us wasn't our job."
Dream wonders why Nightmare had been so set on doing their job so well... Dream has ideas but none of them are happy reasons.
"What... waht did you tell him? That made him desperate to do this job well?" Which lies had Nim told Nightmare in Dream's absence...?
Dream hugs his legs "Why did you never bother to tell me?" Dream grows angry as he huffs "Why did you never bother to tell me the same? Or tell me when Nighty was near? Or tell nighty when I was near? What was it you were trying so hard to protect?!"
A memory. from so long long ago. It had been raining and Nightmare hadn't been around. Ligthning had been flashing and Dream had been so afraid. His mother had help him within her branches. protected him. reassured him he would be safe. told him...
told him that Dream just had to protect himself. protect the hope he represented...
Dream laughs as he kicks the grave of his mother. glaring at it angerly "Was it worth it?! Was it worth killing one of your sons to protect the other?! Was it worth being the cause of all this pain and suffering we both had to go through?!" Dream shakes his skull as he gets up "Nevermind. You are never going to give me answers... and honestly. I am tired of you being a part of my life in anyway. I hope you rot whereever you are now." and he walks back to the forest.
It is silent and he prefers it like that. Things had been loud and hectic.
And well...
Maybe just maybe... He had done the same as Nightamre had done.
He gets to the forest lake and immediantly spots the tiny grave.
Well not grave. Dream shies away from that word. Nightmare is very much alive after all. It is more like a memorial... Wait those can be made for living people right? drema thinks so.
It was nice. It gave him a safe place to grieve and talk about everything. to imagine Nightmare across from him and listening to him. Like old times.
Dream figures that is why his own grave nad Nim's are still up. Dream knows Nightmare has to come by to take care of both graves and Dream snorts as he imagines Nightmare just telling the two graves in all the things they had been wrong in and all the stupid lies they believed.
For now he sits down and pulls out a few little knick-knacks he had collected form across the multiverse.
Dream keeps his voice quiet. Afraid someone will hear and come ruin it "Hey little brother..." he can't forget anymore that Nightmare had been his younger twin. Yet it had always been Nightmare who took care of him. "I am back..."
finally back.
Dream traces the stone and wood structure he had made. all still in perfect condition. With the AU being dead there was no more decay.
Dream organises everything he had left before sitting across from it "Sorry it took me a while. I had a.... I had an identity crisis." he snorts "I know. ironic isn't it? Everyone was always so quick to help and guide me to be what i should be yet it helped nothing. I still ended up unsure about who i was or what i had to do..."
he looks at the snowglobe he had put down "I was always jealous of how you just seemed to have it all figured out. How you were confident in what you did. Both before and after the apples. it felt like i was failing, and i guess in the end i did fail as everything i believed had been a lie..."
Dream sighs as he leans his cheek on his knee as he keeps looking at the structure "It is stupid... I had all the help in the world, and then even the multiverse. and yet still i didn't figure it out. I still didn't figure out i was a god of balance over positivity. I still didn't figure out i was doing more harm than good..."
Dream traces the grey grass under him "I was so against picking a domain Nighty... partly because i didn't want to pick something and get you stuck with something you would be hated for. Not again... but that wasn't all."
Dream hugs his legs and confesses what had been weighing him down "I was afraid of picking wrong. No, I am afraid of picking soemthing wrong. That i will pick something and once again not understand it... How did you do it Nightmare? How did you figure out what you were suposed to do? You didn't have help yet you understood...."
Drema chuckles and rubs his cheek "Not that it matters anymore. aparently i did already pick... Reaper confirmed it for me not too long ago... a god of progress. What the hell does that even mean? What does it mean i should do? I know i aparently helped blue by inspiring him to get out of that loop but still! That was on accident! what if i once again go to far?! what if i..." he hides his face "What if i mess up again?"
Guilt and Dream chuckles "Here i go again... whining about my trouble... I don't even know what my choice and pick do you... what is even the oposite of progress?! regression? Did i make it so you are stuck with like... reset stuff?!" he sighs as he rubs his cheek and rubs the tears away "This shit is so unfair... neither of us ever asked for this. We never wanted this and no one tried to help us before yet expected us to just know."
Dream stares at the memorial. no answers of course but he does feel better after speaking about his worries.
Dream chuckles as he pats the memorial gently "But.... that wasn't why i am here. As you know... today is a special day!" he turns to his pack and pulls out a bottle. it is champagne. and a few cupcakes. he lays the cupcakes between him and the structure before putting a candle on both cupcakes and lighting them.
Dream smiles as he opens the bottle and holds it up to the grave "It is our birthday!"
Dream rubs his neck "I know it must seem weird. after all! For the last i don't even know how many years i had so many people to celebrate with and so many powers and even before that it were the villagers but... well..."
his voice grows softer and softer "I miss when it was just us. After we collected berries and fresh fruits. when we would sneak off together and sit by the river to eat the fruits together and give each other small gifts..." he pulls a small wooden statue from his pack.
Dream looks at it and rubs the wood. He had spend weeks on it. an old familiar skill now unfamiliar and feeling alien in his hands. he managed to make a small owl at least. even if one eye was clearly bigger than the other and Dream now had more splinters in his hands then ever before, even more than he first started.
He places it carefully in front of the memorial "I know it... it isn't my best work... I am going to be honest, it is porbably my worst..." he just hadn't had time to try again. He tried so many times but none of them have looked right and as time went by it just kept getting worse and suddenly he didn't have time anymore.
Dream chuckles "It sucks that i.... i didn't keep up with the hobby... I hope you kept reading at least... that you had the chance to keep reading... your picture and castle seemed to reinforce this at least... there were so many books in there! and the picture of you reading..." he rubs his arm as he keeps sitting right there "I am sorry... that you felt like he had to leave and run from your home... again..." he glances down adn chuckles "look at me... rambling... lets blow out the candles okay? I will blow out both. Don't forget to make a wish."
Drema leans down and blows out the candles on both cupcakes before putting his hands together and making his wish.
A silent whisper in his mind.
please.
please.
Just give him the chance to meet Nightmare again.
To talk to him one more time.
If only once to tell him he is sorry and that Dream loves him.
Dream opens his sockets and smiles at the grave, ignoring the tears that are leaving his sockets "Did you make a wish nightmare? Remember. No telling! otherwise it wont come true!"
Dream takes the two cupcakes and eats both before opening the champagne bottle and drinking straight from it. He isn't a fan of stuff like this but champagne is suposed to be for celebrations and well... celebrating himself and his twin seems like a good reason.
He spends his afternoon like that. just being in his old AU thinking back.
Fitting. a god of progress... stuck thinking about the past.
Dream chuckles and sighs "Blue said it is fine you know? To take time and get used to everything... I just hope... that you are doing the same... taking your time to rest after everything. I can only imagine how exhausting it would ahve been to have to do everything you did while everyone was actively working against you..." he smiles up "Good news for that though! I managed to visit pretty much everyone who knew either of us personally or about us! And i managed to explain the situation! so.. hopefully... whever you are or are planning on going, people will let you be and do your thing..."
Dream smiles at the memorial with the raised bottle "to us. to the future... and... I miss you... I am sorry i didn't make it obvious how much you mean to me..."
That had to be the reason why Nightmare hadn't searched him out yet... because he beleived that Dream hated him.
And that is on Dream. On dream for not doing a good job as brother and making it obvious that he loved his twin.
Dream hums as he leans against the stone structure "I love you nighty. And I promise you, I will make it up to you once we meet again."
Maybe that is why he is the god of progress. Because he is willing to move forwards and make it up. progress towards a new future.
Dream blinks and laughs "I bet you would have heard my title and figured it out immediantly." he giggles as he leans against the stone "Happy birthday Nightmare."
Happy birthday to me.
Dream sips the expensive bottle and enjoys the peace and silence.
*-------------------------*
First drabble Prev drabble Next drabble
#utmv#realageau#dream sans#dreamtale dream#Only dream today!#And he is thinking and remembering!#Still no edits or betas. just me letting dream ramble and think and feel what he feels#also! Look at that!#Dream knows what his domain is!#it is progression!#Dream will figure out what he wants with that later.#ironically dream is very stuck in the past#but just because he remembers the past doesn't mean he can't move forwards#How can you move forwards after all. if you are unwilling to learn from the past?#Dream just isn't feeling confident at the moment and he needs time. but he will figure it out!#Much like Nightmare uses restoration to help things return to a whole moment. to ENABLE them to heal.#(like making the mushroom tree return to a moment of being healthy so he could remove the thing doing harm)#Dream learns and uses the past. to help others learn and move forwards.#(like how blue learned from the resets nad moved forwards by changing and adapting)#Very much connected with the same overall goal but through different means <3#No baby in the drabble thought </3#Also yeah Dream sitll isn't aware that Nightmare is baby. which is gonna be QUITE the reveal... eventually :D#Euh. I think that is it for todays drabble lmao#It isn't perfect but euh they never are and i am not going ot drive myself crazy trying to make a drabble perfect ;P
68 notes
·
View notes