#that's YOUR wanker

[captainkirkk]

I started watching Ted Lasso. Hated the first episode because of second-hand embarrassment, and then loved the second episode. Is this show just one guy winning over the hearts of grouchy British soccer team by being friendly and thoughtful?? Ted is so nice it actually hurts me

[zevanthsnecromancy]

Seras you absolute muppet head.

[buckingham-ashtray]

john and sherlock bickering over the head of a very dead corpse might just be the most ridiculous thing in the entire show

[fcb-mv33]

He did not just say simply lovely on the radio what a slimy little boy ew gtf away

[xxplastic-cubexx]

Bro 😭 I'm gonna implode. I just finished Dawn of X vol3 and Erik's FACE at Charles' return-

He looks like he's gonna bawl his eyes out. You KNOW he just clung to Charles when they got back to Krakoa, all the while Charles petted his hair and told him "I'm alright, I'm here."

bro i justtttt KNOW erik was trying so hard to be nonchalant about charles coming back but the second charles touches his arm or something innocuous like that hes gonna crumble

[rubyreadd]

🎤talk about all three of your vale wips if you want

One common misunderstanding I see about Casey and Valentino's relationship and rivalry, which was exemplified by Casey's visit to the ranch, is the assumption that Casey and Vale despise each other. Yes, towards the end of Casey's motogp career things got petty and snippy between them, but their issues have always been about each other as riders and competitors. Not so much the actual person.

Vale has been always openly complimentary of Casey and considers him one of the greatest to ever do it. Vale liked fighting Casey on track! He had fun! Vale radiates such joy in all of the media about Casey's visit to the ranch because this is about sharing passion and history with a man Vale holds in high regard.

And as much as Casey continues to hold grudges against Valentino, he does like the bloke. In his post about visiting the ranch, Casey wrote in the caption that despite the many differences and years between them, Valentino and he will always share racing and bikes. Sure, Casey's niceties towards Vale can have a double-edged quality, but in my opinion, that is an awfully fond thing for Casey to say about the person he's apparently been exploding with his mind since his debut.

So that's where we find ourselves at the beginning of my Casey/Vale ranch fic. Written from Casey's POV because I love sinking my teeth into the marrow of why some people are Like That, this fic is about trying to reconcile with the fact that the one person who knows you best in the world is the guy you (don't) hate the most.

Since his retirement, Casey has kept a professional separation between him and Valentino. They raced together and they were each other's rival. Casey won and then Valentino won more. Everything they shared refined to career statistics.

Whenever he's asked, Casey calls him Valentino, or Rossi. Exceptional. Indomitable. A bit of a cunt.

Even the things Casey doesn't talk about he keeps pigeonholed. The touching, the compliments, the sex- it was about what they could take from each other.

So when Valentino texts Casey inviting him to the Ranch it shouldn't even warrant a second thought to politely decline. Instead, Casey leaves Valentino on read for twenty four hours before accepting, a decision he justifies as morbid curiosity.

Everything unravels fairly quickly after that.

For the sake of building forced proximity narrative tension, Casey spends a long weekend at the Ranch. He offers to get a hotel but Valentino laughs him off and tells Casey he'll be staying with Valentino. Which is.. fine.

The drive over is spent rationalising being at the Ranch as like being at one of the many training camps Casey has done over his career. A no stakes weekend that will be attended by most of Valentino's academy and almost certainly used for social media promotion. Which makes it fine.

Pulling into the Ranch, it's Valentino who heads the welcome party, because of course it is. Casey is barely out of the car before Valentino is drawing him into a hug, familiar and warm, greeting Casey with such enthusiasm it splits his face into a one thousand watt smile.

And then they're off.

That first day is indeed spent mostly like a training camp. Valentino takes him on the grand tour, a non-stop spout of narration that Casey nods attentively along to. Of course Casey always knew the Ranch was important to Valentino, but this is something else entirely.

Although the thought doesn't stay with Casey for long because Valentino shepherds him into the garage and towards his bike. They chase each other around the track, the rumble of Valentino's bike behind him, the shining yellow of his leathers in front; it's like it's 2008 all over again. Which again, is fine.

In between sessions Casey pinballs from conversation to conversation. There's Marco, who is Casey is genuinely happy to see. He wraps Casey up in another hearty hug-- Italians --and listens eagerly while Casey regales him with all his happier memories on a bike.

Luca snags him next. He's keen on Casey's setup process and riding ethos and is an attentive student as Casey explains his practice. Valentino wanders over at some point to join his brother and Casey pauses expecting an interruption, but Valentino seems content to just listen while Casey talks.

And when night has well and truly settled over the track, Valentino, wide eyed and hopeful, invites Casey to dinner. Casey tells himself it's because it would be rude to refuse his host's hospitality when so much effort was went too. Not because he likes having Valentino's attention. Not even they sit together all night, pressed almost shoulder to hip.

It is only in the sanctity of the guest bedroom Valentino prepared for him that Casey makes his confession. Lying in bed Casey picks apart the Instagram post Valentino tags him in, his video self almost unrecognisable. There's one, shortly after Luca had taken his leave, and Casey had taken his spot next to Valentino. They lean into each other, a scant few inches a part.

Casey turns his head into the pillow, breathing in clean laundry and jerks himself off to what he thinks, hopes, is Valentino's lingering scent.

The next day is quieter, just him and Valentino mostly. They race each other until they can't remember who's leading the scoreboard. Until Casey's mouth tastes like dust. Until they collapse against each other, exhausted, and the vibrations of Valentino's laugh feel like the purr of Casey's bike under him.

Casey wants to turn and run. He doesn't belong here, in Valentino's space, his home, his heart carved into the landscape that raised him.

Casey stands abruptly, mumbling an empty excuse about showering, but before he can flee a hand closes around his ankle. He looks down and Valentino has shifted onto his knees, looking up at Casey equal parts apprehensive and awed.

"You still race like a god"

Something snaps. Or maybe it clicks into place. Casey manhandles Valentino over his bike, hobbling Valentino with his leathers and stretching him open with spit and sweat. Base, is how Casey fucks Valentino, restraint trampled under the weight of Casey's want as he takes Valentino apart in the dirt, on the track.

Bikes have never been about romance to Casey, but when Valentino looks over his shoulder at him, the shape of the chassis pressed into his face while his voice breaks around Casey's name, Casey is overcome by a heady rush of understanding. Finally he has mastered both the man and machine that have defined his life, and now absolute victory, trembling and sweet, is his.

[charmac]

Today I spent about an hour around/with Rob and I'm gonna write about it.

He recognised me from last night, came up and talked to us where I really lost all ability to calm or filter myself (which was, admittedly, already very little). He told me he's been seeing a lot of my Tweets and I asked why he followed me. He said he thought I had "a lot of fun and interesting things to say." I did not expect that, literally at all, I was trying to see if he knew my handle, @/pqdres, was for San Diego's baseball team, so I derailed myself from that conversation a bit lol oops.

The night before this he signed my S10 DVD cover on the plastic protector I had, so he offered to sign it properly when he noticed I had it with me again tonight:

I know I just kind of bulldoze over his words, (He said “Thank you for all the Twitter love”) but it’s because I had a script in my head and.. I'm sure a lot of you guys get it, lol. He didn't seem bothered, which I really appreciate.

He took individual photos with everyone who wanted one (like half the people in the bar (which wasn't even that many) had no interest in him) and when we were taking mine he asked for someone to shine an overhead light so we could get a good picture together bc I offhandedly said I needed to turn off my front flash.

I met him again, a little later at another bar (like Charlie and Glenn in October, he just kinda was walking around and hitting up various bars Four Walls was advertising at) and I apologised for my constant presence around him. The reason I stuck around was because I had one last request for the night, something I very much owed to @macdennissurvivor. I told him Emma was the person who got me into the Sunny fandom, and I would appreciate if he could say hi to her on camera. I started recording and then he said 'Nope give me your phone' and then went on a walk and recorded a 20 second video for her on my phone. I think that moment was a fundamental tilt for me.

I know I criticize this man a bit, but god-fucking-damn-it if he isn't the creator of my favourite show in the whole world, one of my favourite characters of all time, half of my URL, the reason I am writing and creating as much as I currently do, the reason I have made actual, real, deep friendships in the past few years, and he took so much time and patience with me, he recorded a whole video for my friend because he does fucking care. He sees us, this part of the fandom, and he appreciates it: that we’re a community and truly connect through his show. Words really can't express my emotions. Thank you Rob, for this.

[crowleyissnek]

Day 29 of: #ineffablemay2024

'Metatron'

Bloody bastard! 🖕

[valdomarx]

"Fucking wanker!"

Roy elbows his way past Jamie into the locker room, shoving him aside with one shoulder.

"Pass the fucking ball to your teammates once in a while, yeah? Fucking selfish prick."

Jamie sneers and pretends not to notice the sour looks he's getting from the rest of the team.

-

"Oi! Dipshit!" Roy stands on the sidelines and makes a rude gesture in Jamie's direction. "We're supposed to be training agility, not fucking attention-seeking stupidity. Get your head out your arse!"

Jamie scowls but throws himself back into the drill, focusing on his footwork and moving around each cone perfectly. When he sneaks a glance over at the coaches, Roy is regarding him with cool indifference.

Ah well. At least it's an improvement on outright hostility.

-

Jamie punches Sam joyfully in the arm. "Nice one, mate. You killed it today."

Sam beams, and Jamie looks up to see Roy looking at him with furrowed brow. He sticks his tongue out at him.

"Knob end," Roy says, but he's almost smiling.

-

"I'm just saying," Jamie takes a step closer, getting right up in Roy's face. It's probably a terrible fucking idea but he's never been known for his careful forward planning, has he? "I know you want it."

Roy's jaw twitches and his face is like a storm cloud. Jamie has a horrible feeling he might be about to get decked.

"Fucking dickhead," Roy says, before shoving him up against the wall and kissing him breathless.

-

It's a hell of a goal. Jamie is 30 yards out and his teammates are keeping the defence busy when the ball drops at his feet. He looks down the length of the field and he doesn't even have to think: he dodges a quick faint and punts it hard, a wildly arcing curve down toward goal and past the keeper's hands.

The crowd erupts.

Dani and Isaac land on him first, then the rest of the team pile on top of him with cheers and whoops. When he emerges from under the pile he looks over to the coach's box where Roy is rolling his eyes.

"Jammy bastard," Roy mouths at him, but even from the pitch Jamie can see the way he's smiling.

-

The alarm goes off at 3:30 a.m.

"Urghhhhh." Jamie pulls the duvet over his head. "'S too fucking early. We can skip training today, right?"

Roy flops on top of him and kisses a trail along the top of his shoulder. "Absolutely fucking not."

"You're really gonna make me train? After the fucking blowjob to end all blowjobs I gave you last night?"

"Yup." Roy pops the p in a way that means he's having fun. Jamie can tell even with his face buried in the pillow.

Jamie sighs and throws off the duvet, rolling over until Roy is in his arms. He's got pillow creases on his cheek and he's smiling at Jamie like he's the fucking sun.

Jamie kisses him, just because he can, and steels himself for an early morning run. "Fucking wanker," he says, and Roy just laughs.

[jessiesjaded]

everyone woke up on tumblr this week and went Hey, im gonna be a rude cunt to jessie about her gifs, apparently.

[riderkaitlyn5]

York: Dinosaurs aren't extinct. I mean, Wyoming is walking in this room

Wash: *wheeze*

[chamerionwrites]

Every election cycle I think I can’t get more depressed about the state of USAmerican politics and every election cycle I reach new lows of despair

[faunandfloraas]

Nothing like having a tumblr moot who's so on the same page as you with things that one post from them saying "x is SO good" that you just immediately add it to a list of things to check out bc you know it's gonna be banger

[massiveharmonytiger]

Is it just me or anyone else think that Santiago was like that™ because Louis fell for Lestat and Armand, but barely noticed him.

[courfee]

“So, tell me what you know.” “Like, in general?” James asks. Regulus turns his head to give him an unimpressed glare. “Of course, James, just tell me every single thing you know. Can’t take very long after all.” Merlin, James loves Regulus’ glare. He’d gladly let himself be cut open by those sharp eyes. “No, idiot,” Regulus continues and he might as well have called him love by the way it makes James grin. “Tell me what you know about the night sky.” “Oh. Right.” James looks away from the star next to him and up towards the less bright shining ones in the vastness hanging above him. He studies the speckless for a while before lifting his hand and pointing at the thin, silver sickle. “That’s the moon,” he says.

the next chapter is here! all the exciting things happen in this one :)

[franking-the-gens-lost]

Whats up with blue boy, bitch

-🕯

(Ooc: no meanness intended toward you)

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n o t h e r e a n y m o r e g o a s k h i m