#that just got away from me XD
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Writers Truth or Dare | Open
@sleeplesswork asked: 🍓 ⇢ how did you get into writing fanfiction ( roleplay ) ? 🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings
🍓 ⇢ how did you get into writing fanfiction ( roleplay ) ? Both, actually, I got into around the same time for the same fandom, and also kind of for the same reason! The good, age old reason of 'I love this story and this character, LET ME SELF INSERT'. So, my first RPs were literally just me and my best friend and fellow fan of this obscure ass anime playing our RL selves and also, taking on each others favorite characters to romance lol. As for my fanfiction, it was very much mary sue 'everything depends on you and you're the chosen one AND you have all our powers, avatar style, AAAAND your fave is fated to fall in love with you'. It was my beginning, guys, don't worry, I pay my penance by rereading and cringing now and again lmao.
🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings Welp, since this says SHIPS and not SHIP, I think I'll give a headcanon for a few ships. Top three are my main FF7 ships, each of which I am currently working on one passion project fic each (Strifentine one is currently one chapter up! available on ao3!), and then two more are because they're some of my extra faves that I've been exploring on here with a great partner!
Strifentine: This has actually been explored in RP with a brilliant partner, and will be explored in the fic, but Cloud makes it a point with Vincent to interact with and understand the others within him, affectionately deemed Headmates. Vincent has spent too many years thinking them either burdened or fellow monsters locked in a cramped cell, when not just trying to completely ignore them. And that has been Vincent's choice, at times, because of his judgment of himself and others. But, he has grown to realize, with Cloud's support, he does not truly hate them. They're just as stuck as he is, they were just as violated as he was, and though they do not live traditionally and much at all now while inside him (just barely living when they take over his body), they are still conscious beings. And so Cloud makes an effort to ask about them, to be aware of them, to help Vincent be aware of them, and when Vincent feels willing to allow them free in a healthier form, IE not due to battle, Cloud is there to greet them and simply be there with them, to keep company, to interact, and if they get out of control, to keep them under control. It has helped them all grow into a more comfortable, balanced existence, though it's not without it's complicated times.
Sephesis: maybe not a normal headcanon, since it branches into What If scenarios. But, still. It is my firm belief, even if to some it seems like they must be doomed by the narrative and in that they could never communicate and reconcile properly, HOWEVER. Say they weren't lol. If the Nibelheim incident had gone another way, either pre fire, or post fire, and Sephiroth and Genesis had time to face once another again, get out grievances but also have a chance to apologize if they weren't so stubborn, I think we can all agree Sephiroth would have given his cells. If he was back in a place to see Genesis as the friend he cared for and had been losing, if he could recognize their situation more clearly without the trauma making it far more negative, and if he could believe it would save him and not make them both more monstrous, he would not have hesitated. Genesis was one of the single most important people in his life, and there were many stages in their time together that he would give everything just for them to be side by side, and Genesis RECOGNIZE they were side by side, equals. Sephiroth would have done anything to hold on to Genesis, if he hadn't been in such a state where his mind and heart was made to believe everything he had once held onto was dead, gone, or a lie.
Sefikura: In complicated scenarios, unhealthy as they can be, even if it were a scenario where Sephiroth was returned and could live a balanced life, however he might have to atone, with Cloud, they both still have a puppet issue. More often than not it is a subject of distrust and discomfort because of the risks it poses. But Cloud can't deny the bliss that can come with giving over to another's control completely, to not have to be responsible for who and what he is, and Sephiroth of course clings to the power because if he controls the one he loves, they can never leave him. And on the flip side, in scenarios where it was ever possible (stretch of canon possibility of course), in scenarios of Cloud's jenova cells becoming stronger or even just his influence as Sephiroth's anchor in returning to existence being a part of it, though Cloud would not enjoy enacting the power too often, Sephiroth has a weakness for it. Cloud isn't the only one who could enjoy the sweet release of loosing control, if only Sephiroth could give that control to someone he trusts wholly. Someone who could end him if need be, and love him against all reason. To be under Cloud's control, to be in his grip, it is a very complicated euphoria.
Rufus/Reno: It takes a great deal of time, trauma, closeness, complications, and finally balance between the two of them but Rufus is the only one to know some of the most important things about him. Few others know it all. About his name, his brother, and his mother. Tseng knows his former name, Tseng knows about his brother and Rude knows a gist about his complicated family crap and a few more details about his brother. But Rufus is the only one that Reno finds himself willing to confess the gritty details to. The details that aren't just for clarity of the job, or for mental assessments. The details that could be shared, between the two of them, for the sake of sharing and relating. Because they're both just boys who's families were hell and fell apart, and they're just doing their best to make the most of themselves, despite being sad boys at heart, angry at their failed parents and morning the loss of one.
Rufus/AU-Vincent: In this AU, Vincent is forced to train in Deepground to better his control of his 'beasts', especially Chaos, but all the while to teach those in Deepground close to his level in monstrosity, IE the Tsviets. He is a multipurpose tool of ShinRa at this point, mostly owned by Hojo, as in he can tug his leash at any time, but he loans him off back to the Turks most of the time, unless he needs 'retraining', to which he is either brought back to secure labs in Deepground for conditioning and refining that involves tampering with his memory at times, or he's thrown back in to training with the Tsviets, or both. Given this, he is very much a slave to his emotions and so he has to restrain them often. If he looses control, he looses control of them, and finds himself in Hojo's grasp again. So when he's been working as Rufus' body guard long enough (as he is pulled away from said duty a few times for different reasons, more so before Rufus is every VP much less president). But in his time with Rufus, as his complicated nature and how he is forced ot deal with it is made more clear to Rufus, the VP and eventual president begins working to expand training options. Better ways to keep his emotions level. Better ways to assess the nature of those within him and how to cater to taming each, or using them. And working through all the control Hojo has. It's a subtle mission, but with Rufus' help, by the time he's president, he is already working Vincent out of Hojo's clutches, though there is always risk and dread. However, Rufus greatest ally is also the greatest threat of Vincent's beast. Given Vincent's training, Chaos is the strongest, smartest, and most self aware and able to take control. And with training and focus, he is intent on overriding Hojo's tools of manipulation. But his chaotic nature and hidden motives are as much a threat to Rufus as anyone else. It takes winning him over, to some level of mutual trust through mutual gain, that they will override Hojo.
#sleeplesswork#ash talks#ooc ask#ask meme#ask answered#onewinged meme#sorry not sorry for the length#(but actually a lil sorry lol)#that just got away from me XD
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nepeta told me her sona looks like this real and true
#fan art#my art#homestuck#nepeta#nepeta leijon#half of me wishes i could claim this as my own character XD she's so cute#i was inspired by a fic where she n kk were roleplaying.#i just. i just think she should look like this and karkat should be sparkling and charismatic like he was in summerteen romance#her tail is prehensile and she paints with it. she got the gloves from her horse friend#she uses her wings to keep up with her dragon friend when she flies away with her hunts#i feel like taking off the ring off unlocks some crazy power idk#like gives her more wings or more arms. more tails#liv safe
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Angsty Bilbo dying Bagginshield art giving me another story idea~ 😂😭💕
But no, seriously? A play on the popular time travel fix-it, but one where Bilbo dies protecting Thorin during the Battle of Five Armies? And Thorin is inconsolable, I can’t even. And he might pull himself together long enough to stabilize Erebor, but there is No Way he can be a good ruler in his grief, so he has to pass it on. (I was going to say to Dain just to twist that knife a little harder, but actually there are reasons hinted below on why Fíli & Kíli must have lived.) And Thorin just… he wanders, probably. A shell of himself for the rest of his days.
And yet, when he inevitably passes away, he awakens on the road to the Shire. And he’s younger. And he’s so confused, quickly suspecting he must be dead and this is nothing like what he was taught to expect. But then his instant impulse to check Bag End has him walking in on that same meeting from so many years ago, his Company intact, the wizard smiling at him, introducing him to… to…
Bilbo. His Bilbo. The sight of him makes Thorin want to weep and hold him and never let go again, but he is instantly terrified to do anything, because is this a dream? Will he wake? What happens if he says something new, will ‘this’ be ruined somehow? He doesn’t want that, doesn’t want to change anything, save for the end. The very end.
But, even as he strives to mimic himself, he knows something is wrong. He’s off-script from the start purely due to his shock, but he tries to recover, get back on track, and within words, he’s managed it. The discussion is righting itself, and no one there could possibly know the difference, right?
And yet, Bilbo stares at him. From the instant Thorin walked in, Bilbo was staring, looking lost. As he had before, that first time, but it wasn’t the same. Bilbo had been confused then as well, but it had been a light, anxious uncertainty then. This time? He was frowning, his expression tense.
His eyes haunted.
Because Bilbo has also lived that night before. Just once as far as that night was concerned, but it was familiar to him. So familiar. That first night had haunted him for decades, to the very end of his long, long life, when he thought he might know rest, and perhaps — if he was truly as lucky as some once claimed — he might get to see his friends again. See Thorin again.
Instead he had slept, drifted away, and awoken to a battle about to start.
And he had questioned it, had stumbled that first time, but he adjusted. He tried to save Thorin. To save them all.
And he failed. Again.
Then, when he finally slept for the first time afterwards, he awoke to the battle starting again.
And again.
And he tried, over and over, day after the same horrid day to find a way to get through. And sometimes Thorin lived. Sometimes the princes did. Sometimes, new people died. The wrong people.
Once, in his darkest moments, he thought that perhaps someone was trying to teach him humility, teach him to accept fate as it was and not try to fight it, not change anything. And so he went through the motions as well as he could remember them after all those years, following them to the letter, save for when he sobbed all the harder when it was done.
He sobbed again, the relief bone-deep, when he awoke again the next day, the battle still awaiting him.
He lost count of his attempts, and no one could rightly vouch for his state of mind when he finally resorted to the one thing he had refused to try: Not since that fourth (or fifth?) time, when he managed to be there for the fight and threw himself in Azog’s way, but Thorin pulled him out of the way, and screamed at him with such outrage and fear and despair in the few beats he bought by pushing Azog over, that Bilbo never attempted it again.
Until that final day. And that time, Bilbo didn’t give Thorin a chance to stop him.
And it broke a heart Bilbo thought long since shattered to hear Thorin scream, to feel him pick him up and hold him close and hear his voice like that. But the words faded soon enough, and he couldn’t feel anything, nothing except for regret and acceptance, because this was different. He felt it. This time, he would not awaken again, and that was fine. He had saved his king, kept all of his dwarves safe that last time. If that was to be the last, then that was all he could ask for. It was alright. He could sleep.
Then he woke up.
Not outside Erebor, but inside a hole. His hole. Bag End.
He walked outside, stood in the sun, and watched a wizard walk up the road to his door.
He did not understand.
#bagginshield#the hobbit#thilbo#ANGST#cw character death#(though they get better)#story ideas#xD; that got away from me#but yes—if it isn’t clear the Bilbo is from the canon run but looped back. and Thorin’s come back from the loop Bilbo died in.#because why have 1 angst touched time traveler when you can have 2?#and my one sadness with most time travel fix-its is one member (usually Thorin) often doesn’t remember the original time line#and i love canon bagginshield bonding! so i went for a take where both would recall it#queue your bets: do they drag out the unknowns the entire quest#or does one or both sus out the other before the first night is even over?#whenever the truth comes out—do we get screaming crying or the most dramatic moulin rouge-level confessions ever?#(spoilers: it’s all three. probably in that order. with repeats potentially.)#i kinda wanna name this one but best i can think of now is—#twin echoes au#the art that inspired this is just below btw!
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❤️🚨 Hellbent Con 2024 Catalogue 🚨❤️
I'm going to be tabling at @hellbentcon next weekend and I'm so excited to debut all of my new hazbin & helluva merch!!🥰💗💞💞
the Discord link is already live, so if you'd like to join and chitchat, just click the link > here <😊🌟✨️
#hazbin hotel#helluva boss#hellbent con#huskerdust#chaggie#stolitz#and too many characters to tag lol#ive been working super hard on my new art pieces for Hellbent Con#and i really hope you guys will like them🥺🙏#i wanted to make even more but time got away from me XD#maybe if theres enough demand i still will👀#just lemme know!~☆#♡♡♡♡♡♡♡#catalogue#my catalogue
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@giftober 2023 | Day 2: coffee/tea
Can I get you anything? Coffee? Beer? Surge?
Headless: A Sleepy Hollow Story [x]
#giftober2023#headless: a sleepy hollow story#userthing#katrina and ichabod#bromtilda#shipwrecked comedy#arctic monkeys#my edits#katrina van tassel#icabod crane#matilda bishop#brom bones#headlessedit#abraham van brunt#i love that kat and matilda have similar but opposite energy somehow#and ichabod and brom are both just giving heart eyes#anyway this prompt got away from me XD
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tagging some art reminded me. i think it's the animator in me but it's my favourite thing in the world to see artists draw their oc simplified down to their barest shapes & details
i love it when people draw their ocs like this. like yes!!! tell me what features define them, hand over their basic shapes, give me the tools to make them a more animation friendly design Immediately in my brain!!!
it's so fun to me. i'm half a step away from making a flondon oc cartoon in my brain i swear
#i cannot look at a character design without considering if it would be good to animate#this probably makes zero sense i've just been itching to try and draw in simple cartoon styles lately#like the 2000s cartoon network type stuff#& i'm about 2 seconds away from making a whole concept for a show that doesn't exist#twitch's high zee hijinks but also i think every oc deserves to pop up#a really fun project would be trying to find a cartoon style that works for me and trying to draw other people's ocs in it#but i know i am so very bad at finishing projects#in related news btw i got my adhd meds. which is probably why i now want to concept an entire nonexistent show#fredspeaks#calling myself an animator is a stretch actually i haven't animated in years FDHFJFK but it counts xD
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Two dudes being bros
#the locked tomb#gideon nav#camilla hect#mine#I think Gideon should be allowed to rawr XD even if this just started as mullet Gideon and vamp bang cam#it got away from me…
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I need to know. First is probably touch starved thanks to all the shit that happened to him before his death, right? Which of the chain make it their mission to fix it?
Ok so I saw this ask, sat down, and started writing. So I hope you don’t mind but I’ll be answering your question in fic form
(And it’s more than 1k so I’m just gonna…hide it beneath the cut lol)
Sky breathes in deep and closes his eyes. The tantalizing smell of pumpkin soup wafts to his nostrils, mingling with the smokiness of the fire. The sounds of its crackling and the cheery talk of his companions reach his ears, and he smiles.
It’s been a long, tiring day for them all, but moments like this make it well worth it. The bruises from today’s battles may still ache, and the cuts still sting, yet at the end of it, they have one another.
He allows himself another moment of dark bliss, then opens his eyes. Taking in the sight of the heroes only makes his smile grow.
Across the fire Wild grins and nudges Twilight with his elbow, both of them chuckling over some shared joke. Legend and Warriors sit shoulder to shoulder. Their friendly teasing can be heard from where Sky sits. Wind has settled down beside Time, and though Sky can’t make out what their conversation is about, it seems like the older hero is telling the sailor a story.
Four sits off to the side, engrossed in a book, a soft smile on his face. And Hyrule joins in Twilight and Wild’s conversation now, the laughter growing louder at his cheeky contribution.
Everyone seems happy and light. Perhaps, more so than they have been for a while.
…well, maybe not everyone. Sky sits upright abruptly, scanning the camp for their little group’s newest member. He could have sworn the hero had been right here moments ago. Where had he slipped off to?
Aha.
Sky catches sight of the now familiar silhouette, dark and shadowy against the light of the moon. First sits a short distance away, back to the camp, face upturned to take in the sky. His cape floats lazily upon the breeze.
The Skyloftian takes another glance around the group and makes his decision. He rises.
Though First is much more at ease with the other heroes now, he can still be a bit aloof. Not that Sky blames him. Being with a group can be difficult, especially when constant danger is added to the mix. And after everything the knight has been through his behavior makes sense.
Still, Sky can’t bring himself to believe First actually wants to be alone. He’s seen the yearning in his eyes when he sees the others teasing one another, hugging one another, easy and companionable as family members. And he’s not the only one either.
“There’s no way he doesn’t actually want to sit with us,” Wild had whispered one day when First had broken away yet again to sit alone. “Going as long as he did without anyone even touching him? It’s torture.”
Time had nodded, expression solemn but understanding. “He’s scared. Give him time.”
So, Sky had given him time. Time to adjust and learn to trust them, time to find his footing in a time that was not his own. But First hadn’t stopped putting distance between himself and the others. And Sky is tired of waiting
It’s clear that the knight needs someone else to make the first step. So, tonight he intends to do just that.
It worked with Legend. If he’s lucky, it’ll work with First too.
And so, leaving the comfort of the fire behind, he walks to First’s side.
First doesn’t startle at his approach, but he does turn at the sound of his footsteps. He looks up at him, gaze sharp and cold. If he weren’t accustomed to it by now, Sky would likely turn tail and rush back to the others.
“Hi,” he says, instead, holding up a hand in a little wave. “Mind if I join you?”
Instantly, First’s expression softens.
“Of course not.”
He gestures toward the spot beside him. Sky settles down, sliding close so his shoulder bumps First’s. Though the knight tenses slightly, he doesn’t move away. The Skyloftian is more than happy to count that as a win.
“What’re you doing over here by yourself?” he asks, casually. “It’s much warmer by the fire.”
First hums. He’s looking at the sky again, pale hair and skin giving him an almost otherworldly look beneath the moon’s glow.
“You can see the stars better from here.”
Sky knows that’s a lie. The stars are bright enough to be seen from virtually any angle and the little clearing they’ve made their camp in is among the best. But he lets it slide.
“They’re beautiful,” he says and First nods.
“Every age of Hyrule is unique and their skies are no exception.” A smile tugs at First’s lips. “But somehow the stars are always the same.”
Sky grins. He knows well the comfort of Hyrule’s skies. The same constellations he once gazed at from atop the academy can be seen from Lon Lon Ranch or the Dueling Peaks.
“It’s true. See?” He points and First follows the direction of his finger. “There’s the Loftwing Constellation I used to see on Skyloft. It’s always been my favorite.”
First’s smile grows a bit larger, some of the tension bleeding from his shoulders.
“It’s mine too.”
Emboldened, Sky gestures to another cluster of stars.
“I’ve gotta admit, though, I’ve always been fond of the First Hero.”
First stares at the constellation for a moment. Then, with a chuckle, he shakes his head.
“Now, you're just flattering me.”
He shivers a little and Sky takes the opportunity to scoot closer.
“Here,” he says, untying his sailcloth. He stretches it so both he and First are enveloped in its warmth. “This will keep the cold out.”
First drags his gaze down from his star-gazing to skewer him with a questioning look. Sky meets it with a kind smile, and after a moment the hero relaxes. Carefully, he grasps his end, pulling it snugly over his shoulders. And Sky might be imagining it, but he’s almost certain First leans against him just a bit.
“Thank you,” he murmurs.
Sky can’t keep back the grin that lifts his lips.
“My pleasure.”
They sit in silence for a moment, bodies pressed close, eyes trained on the heavens above. Then, First breaks it.
“You don’t have to do this, you know. I appreciate the gesture, truly. But it is unnecessary.”
“Do what?” Sky asks, nonchalantly. “I just felt like spending some time with my predecessor.”
First turns to him, studying him in the darkness. Sky can tell without even looking at his face, that he doesn’t believe him. And after a few very awkward minutes pass he realizes something more genuine is in order.
“I like being with you, First,” he says, gently. He places a hand on First’s shoulder and the knight stiffens. Even in the dark, he can see the fractures in his usually guarded expression. “We all do. You don’t have to be alone.”
Something flits across First’s face, come and gone too fast for Sky to catch it. But before either of them can say anything more, Wild’s cheery voice rings out across the clearing.
“Dinner’s ready! Hurry on over unless you want us to eat it all!”
First looks away, quickly.
“I suppose we’d best head back,” he says, tone suspiciously level. “I don’t doubt their ability to scarf down everything in that pot.”
He doesn’t move, however, and Sky decides to take another chance. He gives him a gentle nudge.
“You’re right, we should go.”
Rising, he secures the clasp on the sailcloth once more. Something like remorse flashes across First’s face, but it is gone as quickly as it came. And when Sky turns to head back to camp, he follows him without comment.
Wild is ladling out generous portions of soup when they arrive. He hands them both bowls with a grin.
“It’s Twi’s recipe,” he says, “or more Yeto’s. Either way, don’t worry, I made seconds.”
Sky gives him an answering grin of his own. “Thanks, Champion.” He turns to First and waves a hand. “Come on, you can sit by me.”
The knight hesitates a moment, looking at the log the other heroes have made their seats upon with a mix of longing and trepidation. Then, he nods.
Sky settles down beside Legend, sending the veteran a smile as he does so. That sets First between him and Twilight.
The rancher greets First with a genial nod, which the knight returns as he sits down. Despite his easy movements and relaxed expression, however, Sky can feel the tension that radiates off of him in waves. But as they begin to eat and the conversation turns to favorite battle strategies, he slowly starts to relax.
And when they finish their meal and sleepiness brings their conversations to a lazier pace, the other heroes start to shift positions.
Slowly, they drift over as they always do, seeking the warmth and comfort of close proximity. But unlike other nights, where they usually group together in twos and threes, the heroes decide to form a giant cuddle pile. Even Time joins, though he sticks to the outskirts of it, his head resting on Warriors’ shoulder.
Everyone else snuggles close, lazily mumbling complaints about bony elbows and knees, and sighing as they find comfortable positions.
And First finds himself smack in the center of it all.
He sends Sky an almost worried glance as Wind squeezes between him and the rancher. The sailor huddles close, with a wide yawn.
“This was your plan the whole time, wasn’t it?” The knight whispers, accusingly. But even as he says it, Wind tugs at his cape, cuddling into its warmth. His expression softens and he reaches down, tucking the sailor in more comfortably.
Out of the corner of his eyes, Sky sees the rancher try and fail to hold back a smile.
“I didn’t plan anything,” he replies, innocently. “I think the soup just made everyone extra sleepy. Right, Twilight?”
Twilight nods. “Nothing puts you to sleep like a good bowl of soup. And Yeto’s is the best. Better than a sleep potion, I’d say.”
From First’s expression he doesn’t believe either of them. Regardless, he doesn’t complain after that.
And when his eyelids droop, he finally allows his head to drop onto Sky’s shoulder. Gently, Sky pulls the sailcloth over his shoulders once more. The knight blows out a small sigh of contentment and snuggles closer.
Sky smiles, reveling in this small victory.
“Goodnight, First,” he whispers, settling in and letting his eyes slip closed.
When First replies his words are slurred and thick with sleep. But Sky can hear the smile in them anyway.
“Goodnight, Sky.”
#WOW that got away from me#I couldn’t help it!#a chance to tackle both first’s trust issues and guilt AND the fact that he’s totally touch starved#was way too good to pass up#but long story short#sky’s definitely the one who makes it his mission to help first#all the boys help out in their own way though#they all know what it’s like to be touch starved#so when they see what sky’s up to they’re like ‘ok guys here’s the plan: we’re gonna make a cuddle pile’#anyway#tysm for the ask!!#I’m gonna get around to answering your other one too#I promise#I just keep running out time#maybe cause I’m writing 1k words of first getting snuggled XD#linkeduniverse#lu chain#lu sky#lu first#first meets the chain au#trin answers#trin writes#ficlet#fluff#light angst#touch starved#lovely bumblebeekitten
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You know, when I was first researching neurodivergence (and autism and ADHD in particular) and wondering if I was, in fact, neurodivergent, I brought my conclusions to my mom and she said:
"I mean, you're gifted, right? So you already are neurodivergent???"
So here's to her (kinda) and her words. Giftedness is a neurodivergence, in my opinion. From what I've seen, a lot of the traits overlap with common autistic and/or ADHD traits too, especially regarding overexcitabilities, and a lot of researchers talking about the topic describe giftedness with the same kind of "your brain is just made differently" and "you're just wired differently" language as they use for other neurodivergent conditions. But I also say this because I've seen some gifted people who, while struggling with some "autistic/ADHD traits," don't have all the traits necessary for an autism or ADHD diagnosis. Giftedness is a label for them that encompasses the struggles they have without saying that they don't struggle enough or forcing them to try to fit into a mold that isn't them. And I get that; when I was first questioning, I didn't think I had enough autistic traits to count for a diagnosis either, so I took comfort in a "gifted" label. (Not to say that all gifted people are just autistic people and/or people with ADHD that don't realize, or that all gifted people are just people who don't have enough traits for a diagnosis! That was just the case for me and the folks I've been around, but I've also heard the case of it not being that.)
But if I am gifted, then I also have autism. A lot of my struggles are, honestly, just better described by autism than just by a byproduct of giftedness. My struggles with people and with "being too much," my sensory differences (and yes, sometimes issues), my stimming, and some of my executive dysfunction all sound like autistic traits to me more than a mix of psychomotor and sensual overexcitabilities and a whole bunch of coincidental byproducts of my being gifted and hanging out with nongifted peers. Don't get me wrong; based on my family history, background, and traits, I honestly probably am gifted lol. But it's not just that.
So this is me saying that if the people around you are saying that you're just gifted, you're free to look for other, perhaps better explanations for your feelings and experiences. But if you are just gifted, you're still free to call yourself neurodivergent! My gifted traits lead to me feeling just as ostracized sometimes as my autistic ones, so who am I to police that label?
#I hope this isn't controversial I'd hate for a bunch of folks to come here and start arguing /srs#legitimately hate just the idea of having to deal with that#I just like to talk about myself and part of myself is this#I'd say “one of the rare times this isn't about being nonhuman” but I'm trying to keep this an open blog for my thoughts#since if I make it a “nonhuman blog” then once I stop fixating on this and it becomes another part of my identity#I'll forget about this blog and just vanish#and that's already happened once with a vocaloid blog so I'm trying to prevent it#I just want to stay away from toxicity or discohrse cause that certainly wouldn't help my life or mental health#I made this blog to help me feel better not worse lol#anywayssss#actually gifted#since I heard of someone asking gifted folks to use this tag like they do “actually autistic” and “actually ADHD” ones#I hope you'll take this post#I might post more about giftedness in the future so I'll use that one if I do :D#intellectual giftedness#actually autistic#also ADHD but that'd be a lot to mention here#just know that's why I said *some* of my executive dysfunction#if my experience feels off that might be why#autism#oh and here's the “I probably got something wrong about giftedness go do your own research please (I promise it's fun!)#and if you are gifted I'm sorry if I got stuff majorly wrong“ disclaimer#alright NOW it's time for breakfast XD#gifted kid syndrome#gifted kid burnout
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Man I am just SO CONFUSED. About the time line of this game.
No one is telling me how long links been gone! Or how long the botw-totk timeskip was! They all just started selling my stuff again lol. I'm going to have to get everything redyed!
Me: hey random stranger! Lore dump? You look like a lore dumper.
Kindly npc: why hullo there, link ^^! My, I haven't seen you in a while since the calamity ended! I was so worried when they said you and the princess had gone missing! But it's good to see you're well.
Me: aw, thanks. How long has it actually been tho.
Kindly npc: ^u^
#Having a great time btw I've just been chased across a near sea of miasma by stal riders and more! 10/10 nearly died in a high speed chase#Made it out relatively unscathed which is truly amazing lmao#Spoilers ahead: I have had the funniest time doing the great plateau quest chain. Once I sucked it up and made nice with the creepy statue.#He's(?) been alright. Fair trader. Good deals. I've mostly been terrorising kohga in between absolutely failing to craft working vehicles X#His new boss fights are so much easier than the first one lol. Less fun I'll admit but the music is groovy. You can probably make a#Machine and try and dog fight him but with few exceptions the turning circles are decrepit so I just stuck to mild dodging and shooting him#And running over to hit him some more. Kinda bland for a boss fight I'll say. Could have done with a lot more pizazz. It's kohga come on.#Anyway I do feel kinda bad because apparently he's been stuck down there for however many months/years and I AM kinda cheating with the arm#After the first fight he fled to the gerudo mine and the steward very nicely showed me how to get there but never underestimate#My procrastination because I'd already found it by just exploring so I just teleported. In game it must have been terrifying lmao#Racing across an endless void filled only by the light of your rapidly running out of battery glider and the red glow of the gloom away fro#The apparently immortal ancient warrior who beat you up and tossed you down there and there's no sign of perusal so you're probably safe#But you get there and he's already sitting there poking some bananas having wiped out your goons and plundered your supplies.#Like sorry man but the arm comes with the hero territory I can't exactly take it off.#Maybe if you stopped terrorising the people purah would let you have one of her long distance teleportation slates. It comes with photos?#It can't have been long since botw link hasn't grown an inch XD. Also I've been turning the lore timeline over in my head and still no idea#Are we not sure Rauru isn't from some alternate timeline that got fused with the main loz timeline by accident??#loz#legend of zelda#totk#loz totk#tears of the kingdom#loz tears of the kingdom#totk spoilers
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gosh, seeing people happily discussing about their OCs make me want to show my OCs too but then i realized i still have not make any "official" art of them and their background details are still being worked on
#just me rambling#tbh. my reborn ocs are the only one who ''fully'' fleshed out#Kayne original from Hoenn and their main purpose to go to Reborn was to study these new field effects#Neo (who i considering to change name because there are suprisingly many ocs has Neo name XD)-#was originally from Reborn but moved to Alola after the region got into chaos#then back to Reborn because the Aether president order him to look for rouge scientist that secretly works on Type:null#and then order him to stop the PULSE inventions#Evelyn is one of the orphanage from Sigmund place#she ran away before Lin did and joined team Meteor then leave the team after learning about what happened to Ace#rejuv OCs are like...different cans of worms#because rejuv lores are wild#all ocs are from different worlds that ''stumble'' into this one specific dimension#one OC is hinted to be Ariana who lost her memory because she felt into a Dimensional Rift when running away from the Nihilego#one is an high-ranking scientist of Garufa who got killed by Variya but their soul somehow ''get'' rescued by their Dusknoir and the pokemo#thought it would be safer to literally transfer its trainer soul to different universe#one is related to my other Reborn OC. who...has the most normal background compared to other rejuv ocs#there is also another rejuv oc that...has two versions of themselves#one is specifically made for renegade route and to be the pain in everyone ass
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Trunks has a bit of a foul mouth and curses like a sailor; if he feels he can get away with it he will slip in various swear words without hesitation. He considers them sentence enhancers and it helps really drive the point home.
#Out Of Ki | {OOC}#You Really Think You Can Handle Me? | About the Muse {Trunks}#Have this HC that been on the brain for a bit XD#He's got a bit of a foul mouth on him...and if he thinks he can get away with a swear; he will#Wonder WHO he learned that from >w>#He doesn't understand why anyone cares if he does tho; they're just sentence enhancers in his eyes XD
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entering to panthers pulse does go pretty hard luosty yeah
Luosty Cup Day | 8.5.24 (x)
#eetu luostarinen#florida panthers#so at least i dont have to tag this we are the champions#silver linings in everything i suppose#you know what should be studied? cats fans relationship to panthers pulse#hey remember in the offseason when they revealed we no longer we're gonna have solo goal songs we were mourning#and then they revealed it was this fucking song and there was so much outcry#even i remember the way my face cringed hearing it for the first time#attending 2 games multiple watch parties and a stanley cup win later i think i would die without her#you can't take panthers pulse away from me i love her shes dear to me I WOULD DIE WITHOUT HER#my opinion on the song has changed a lot the more positive memories are associated with jt#but really i credit that drunk guy next to me in the nosebleeds that took a swan dive in the row ahead of us#during a lundy goal at the famed yotes game where i was busy singing along to the song like a maniac because it was the 5th goal we scored#while my mother very worridely tapped my shoulder to go check on the guy (it was her first hockey game) and i went oh a guy fell? really?#when? and she was like JUST NOW DID YOU NOT SEE HIM??? and i went oh why would i pay attention to the guy next to me WE'RE 5-0???#(dw he was fine he just tipped over and was immediately back up and started hollering for the goal like we all were except my mother XD)#(one of the good things to come of this is my abuela agreed with me she went we're here to watch hockey so we're going to watch hockey)#(my poor mother outnumbered by sports fanatics; my abuela who named all my uncles after boca junior players she liked XD)#(also her first game and she got the full hockey experience and loved it but she absolutely backed me up on everything love her so muchhh)
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Why do certain coworkers have to get you so annoyed with them without even trying, and they don't realize how annoying/obnoxious they are?? Or worse, they KNOW how annoying they are but don't seem to care cause they find it funny?
It's like the silence and neutral expressions aren't enough of a hint that I don't think you're funny and you should just stop while you still have your dignity...
Longer rant in the tags cause it's a lot.
#rant post#personal rant#idk what is with boys and think whenever you get annoyed with them means that its ok to keep going on with the shit 😒#i know it's not all boys but just certain ones#he's only 1-2 years younger than me but he acts pretty immature sometimes#he was trying to get my attention by doing stupid shit as distance away but i didn't acknowledge him and he got that message#but afterwards he tries other stuff and cracks himself up whenever he gets me to look at him thinking I'm giving him a reaction#he's....an odd puzzle piece to place#and my workplace is as small as a typical subway so i can't really keep my distance from him unless i go outside or got to the restrooms#ugh i just wish he wasn't like this ALL THE TIME and he wonders i act the way i do around him on the rare occasions he is serious#and it's just me and him working there other than my manager but can't really do anything about that for now#i just wanna scream at him to not smirk at me and dance around me like he's trying to do a mating dance that makes me uncomfortable each tim#-me but i gotta say it in a way that doesn't sound like I'm hysterical about it or cause ridges since I'm still working there#basically he's one of the reasons i want a new job. it shouldn't be the case where a coworker causes you to leave a job#but unfortunately this is where i am at this point#ok rant over XD#I'm going to wash my face and eat something
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It's sad Sakujun hours on this blog, someone quick play an erhu.
i.e. I made the conscious decision, myself, of rewatching his episodes as background noise and now, predictably, I am sad all over again, who could have foreseen this
#i hadn't thought about him in ages and then i listed him in the tags for that shippy post which then prompted me to go tag diving#because i was craving fanart which then got me missing him so i decided to retwatch T_T#his storyline always upset me but it's like. extra upsetting now because ff//xiv has happened in the meantime and#i guess until right this minute i hadn't really consciously realized that saku is essentially prototype ze//nos :////#he's got /the best/ lines about emotional and social illiteracy and difficulty which hit home really hard back when i was his age#and hit even harder now that i'm six years older#don't get me wrong i really like shu//urei (in the first season lmao) but for once i'd LOVE for a female protag to#just. say. 'yes.'#like please stop shying away from power and ambition ;____;#anyway off to the grocery store... where i will continue to think about this guy XD#withoutwords#saiunkoku monogatari
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#i try not to be surprised by the trash fgo gives me in gacha but i cant help but still be upset XD i hate it here. i wish i can stop playing#but i also hate missing events and log in bonuses....im only moving forward because of#story i love the characters but this game is just :)))))))#this is my 49053806th complaint about this game why am i not leaving indeed#i mean i took hiatus one time and it was freeing to forget about the fate series lol#but i got sucked into a black hole and now im struggling to get away from it kdfbhliwefb#ive cried over not getting merlin every banner he got....its just sad that everyone i know has him#meanwhile its taking me literal years to get him#i hate the dont worry youll get him soon! phrases...yes well im jealous and youre not frustrated#as i am#i hate hate hate hate spending money on anything gambling related but uhhhhh shrugs#i wish gacha a very die out soon please#everytime i realize im spending money on voiced jpegs its funny but then theres the serious matter for my psychological needs and stability#to keep me sane haha#i hate it here its not healthy for me its a toxic relationship between me and this game and i need out...#but romani and the story.... i love them too much to leave....#what to do...#i kind of hate talking to friends who whale too and yes im a hypocrite but wow you whale at least you get him meanwhile i spend dollars#on trash and useless crap thanks#[oh dont worry youll get him soon] then they add a smiley face i just wanna wrap my#fingers around my neck and end it allllllllllllllll
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