#that is the fundamental of being a parent

[dykekarkat]

arcane s2 spoilers i guess but my favorite caitlyn moment in this season by far is her conversation with vi when she's trying to convince her to be an enforcer. like immediately vi rejects that and says something like "u want me to be an enforcer? after what they did to my parents? do you understand how that feels?" and CAITLYN'S response is just a perfect showcasing of her misunderstanding of the system. like this is right after she lost her mother to jinx so her response is something like "yes i do". like caitlyn believing that she has been personally victimized by the system through jinx's act of rebellion the same way vi has by losing her parents to enforcers. which is just objectively not true because the violence of jinx and silco and zaun in general will never be state sanctioned. like an enforcers job is to weild violence FOR the state to enforce the status quo and oppress those at the bottom. which is why vi's parents died while they were Rebelling against the state. And we literally see this state sanctioned violence in action when we See caitlyn and vi decide to literally poison the underground. like fundamentally jinx's rebellion is so so different to that but caitlyn is unable to see it because she thinks that all of the violence being enacted is equal in its power, which it isnt. and i think its just such a good moment to show that not even rlly slow slide into fascism by her

[emi-matchu]

It's interesting, I feel like my 20s were about learning how broken the world is, and rightfully resenting the lack of support structures for us to benefit from (and then inherit the maintenance of)

and now… I feel like I've exhausted what I can do by being angry about the state of the world?

the fundamental problems are… a set of centuries-long projects that I will never personally see the end of, and can't be waiting around for

and that my 30s are going to be about choosing what to therefore do in the realities of this world:

accepting that there's no Bigger Better True Adults coming to save us, and whatever happens next will be by literally our hands

idk this is just what I think of… the world has indeed failed us, but it failed our parents and their parents too—and for that to ever change, we need to stand up and choose to help build the better world anyway

and idk, maybe it was silly to ever think that utopia is the baseline of what to expect upon being born?… it's not like humanity had it and then someone really beefed it! this is the path from A to B, detractors and obstacles included

life is struggle, always has been. maybe someday even less so, but today it is this; so now what?

Listen. I get it, ok? I really do. You're autistic, the american education system failed you, you were lied to, raised by bigots, you're just trying your best, you didn't know, I get it. It's not a moral failing not to know something, the default amount of information to have on anything is zero. It's only when you find out that you're able to learn.

But here's the thing. While ignorance isn't a moral failing, it becomes one when, once confronted with your ignorance, you try to justify it instead of putting that energy into accepting it and learning something new. When you're faced with having done something wrong, said something off-color, displaying ignorance, you have to swallow the impulse to go "but I'm a good person, I promise!!!" and make excuses.

We all have our limitations, it's part of being human. But the moment you use your ignorance and limits as an excuse to remain stagnant, you have become culpable in your own ignorance/bigotry/whatever, and it goes from being something inflicted on you by circumstance, to a decision you've made. And that's what brings your moral character into question, far more than any lapse in awareness ever could.

It's okay to be wrong. Normal, even. What's not okay is asserting your preconceptions, defending your "right" to be ignorant, and fussing over your sense of guilt instead of simply going "oh fuck , did I step in it? That's embarassing, sorry," and letting yourself learn.

[malk1ns]

november 8 2024 @ capitals, 4-2 win

the next part in my soulbond series (1, 2, 3, 4). hope you like it!

Sid can feel this season rapidly slipping out of his grasp.

He’d had a lot of talks with Kyle over the summer. Kyle was up-front about his plans for the year, honest and forthright about what he realistically thought the team could do. Their final conversation before Sid signed his extension ended with Kyle telling him, the Penguins are your team, Sidney, but if the direction we’re headed isn’t how you want to finish your career, I understand. It’s up to you.

He’d signed. He’s staying. It wasn’t ever really a choice.

Sid thinks there’s still a part of him that hoped, though. He’s never going to give up on winning, never going to stop chasing the ultimate goal, and the part of his brain that asks his barber to shave down the hair on his temples until the gray is less visible is the same part that clung to the idea of contending.

And, well, anything’s possible. They’re not even a quarter of the way through the season. But.

Worse than the team, though, Sid can feel Geno slipping away.

Geno’s been avoiding him since the Islanders game. After the hellish Carolina blowout, Sid tried to pin him down for a conversation, to actually talk about this bond and how they can fix it, but Geno slipped away, insulated from Sid on the plane by the poker game group and practically running up to his hotel room when they landed in DC.

For a moment Sid even considered going to morning skate to corner him, but Geno’s gameday routine is even more rigid than Sid’s own, and Sid can’t bring himself to mess up Geno’s rhythm, not on a day like today.

Games against Washington always have a little extra importance. Sid takes every game seriously, of course he does, but he won’t lie and say that the Capitals don’t stand out on the calendar more than the rest. Especially now, with records in sight and careers coming to an end.

It’s why he loses his temper and screams on the bench when they blow another lead again in the second.

Losing to an opponent because they’re just better than you is one thing. But what Sid can’t abide, won’t tolerate, is a lack of effort, sloppy play and ignoring the details and fundamentals, making careless mistakes that lead to chances against.

His line is playing well. He can’t say the same for anyone else.

At intermission, Sully stays out of the room at first, and Sid lets loose all his frustrations with the year so far, his anger at the losing streaks and his own struggles, and shouts the team down until they’re properly cowed. And when the coaching staff comes in again, Sid marches up to Sully and tells him to take Geno off the top line.

He says it loud enough for most of the guys to hear, but he doesn’t look over to see what face Geno’s making.

Geno’s been on his wing because of a bond he clearly doesn’t want, and Sid’s been taking advantage of it. If Sid can’t score with the wingers he has, he deserves any failures coming his way.

He spares a thought for his parents, somewhere up in the stands because Sid’s getting close to yet another milestone. Maybe he should tell them to go home.

It was the right decision. Partway through the third, Geno reads a rebound like only he can, breaks the tie, and the Penguins don’t look back.

Winning in Washington always means a lot, but even watching Alex smash his stick and yell at himself on the Capitals’ bench as time ticks down doesn’t make Sid feel better. He keeps his head down when he strips out of his gear, spends entirely too much time on a cooldown bike, and is the last one on the bus, barely making it before Sully would have started yelling about him being late.

At least they have the weekend off.

Sid can feel Geno watching him on the plane. Normally after a road trip like this, Geno would commandeer the window seat next to him, sprawl out and get his legs in Sid’s space, jostling him until Sid relaxed enough to laugh and poke back, the two of them picking at each other until they settled enough to get some sleep.

Nobody takes the empty seat next to Sid this time. He tugs his hat over his eyes and purposely thinks about nothing. At least it’s a short flight.

When they’re deboarding in Pittsburgh, for the first time ever Sid reaches out with the bond on purpose.

The recoil he gets from Geno is enough to send him practically running to his car, racing through the quiet streets to Sewickley faster than he’d normally drive. He feels sick.

Geno might hate him. It was Sid’s lagging production that pulled him into this bond, after all, chained Geno to his side for a week until Sid stopped being selfish and forced them apart again. Geno had been sick, Geno hadn’t been producing, and the second Sid let him free he scored, so… Sid can’t say with confidence that he wouldn’t be furious if their roles were reversed.

He’s so wrapped up in his own self-recriminations that he doesn’t realize Geno’s coming over until he hears a key in his lock, and suddenly Geno’s presence in the back of his mind is inescapable.

“Sid?” Geno calls, and Sid, sitting at his island in his dark kitchen, drops his head into his hands and waits.

When Geno finds him, he swears long and low, a tumble of Russian that Sid would have gotten the gist of even without the bond pulsing concern and guilt his way.

He flinches when Geno flicks the lights on, blinking up at where Geno’s suddenly looming over him.

“We need to talk,” Geno says, and Sid stares at him helplessly, because what is there to say?

Geno shakes his head and sits on the stool next to him, pressing their knees together. Sid feels a wash of relief at the contact so powerful he has to blink away dizzy darkness from the corners of his vision. Geno frowns, the downturned corners of his mouth digging lines into his face. In the harsh overhead lights, he looks haggard, skin pale under the remnants of his summer tan and the bags under his eyes dark and pronounced.

“My fault,” Geno says, holding up one big hand when Sid opens his mouth. “It’s me who starts this, like, after Sochi. I’m think probably I know it’s there and we’re ignore for so long it’s say, no more, has to happen. We have to fix or we’re sick for season.”

Sid shakes his head. “It’s me who made it…whatever,” he says, gesturing. He doesn’t know the right words for what’s happening to them, never read up on bonds because he never expected to have one. “Like, I needed you and made it…this.”

“You needed me,” Geno repeats, and his voice is toneless, but Sid feels a soft bloom of…something in the bond, something that makes him want to reach out and touch.

“I always need you,” Sid mutters, staring at his hands instead of Geno’s face. Almost twenty years together on this team and it shouldn’t feel so strange to admit, of course they need each other, but something about saying it now, out loud…the way he’s feeling, the way he can tell Geno is feeling, makes the words feel fraught.

There’s a long silence, and when Sid looks up, Geno’s biting his lip. “Don’t know what to do,” he admits, and Sid shouldn’t feel relief there, but at least he’s not alone in feeling totally lost.

There’s no real literature for this, not really. They haven’t even been able to have more than a few quick consults with bond specialists since they’ve been on the road.

Sid startles a little when Geno reaches out and covers Sid’s hands with one of his own. His palm is a little damp, but he’s warm, and his hand is big enough to cover both of Sid’s where they’re twisting in his lap.

It’s late. They both should get sleep, even with two full days off from games.

They sit in Sid’s kitchen in silence as night deepens outside.

[greatwyrmgold]

Maybe I'm letting my irritation at the rest of Oshi no Ko chapter 166 cloud my judgement, but...

You know how Ai had complicated feelings about needing to lie to be an idol?

And, you know, needing to lie in general?

That intersection between "lying" and "being an idol" was kind of a big deal back in the day! And Ruby didn't forget the part of her character development where she realized that.

But that's just not a problem for her. Her response to the pressure of having to lie and smile and pretend to have fun on stage is...

This just feels...incredibly disrespectful. Not on Ruby's part; she doesn't have this window into Ai's thoughts, and if having fun helps her deal with job stress, all the better for her.

But it feels disrespectful of Aka Akasaka to write one idol character struggling with the pressures of the entertainment industry, then throw in another character who just kinda deals with it.

Oh, you're self-conscious about having to lie about loving people? About being asked to wear a mask and then being criticized for putting on that mask? Well, you don't have to worry about lying if you're actually having fun, if you don't have to lie to act like people want!

I've got a couple Ruby-loving mutuals who I remember talking at length about how Ruby's arc in general has seen her just Not Having the same problems that other idols in the series face (especially Ai), but this feels different to me. Worse. It's one thing for the series to accidentally write Ruby as a nepobaby whose adoptive parents shield her from the worst parts of the industry, it's another for her/the narrative to just deny any tension caused by the fundamental contradictions of the job, especially when that very tension is the driving force of a character who used to be the most important adult in the story.

[maxdibert]

How do you think Severus would relate to a child of his own, if he had one? What kind of father do you think he would be?

There are so many possible answers to this question because it would really depend on the context in which Snape became a father (before or after the War), his child’s personality, and, of course, what his partner would be like. But, let’s assume we’re talking about a post-War Snape in an AU, because honestly, I can’t imagine canon Severus being a father in any way—it would literally be suicidal. Having a child would not only endanger his mission as a spy but also give his enemies perfect leverage to use against him. And he’s already suffered too much in life to throw in that level of angst. So, starting from a scenario where there’s no war and Severus can focus on being both calm and depressed (because he’d still be depressed, especially if he no longer has a clear purpose keeping him going), I don’t think the idea of fatherhood would really thrill him at first. It’s not like he’s someone who’s ever thought of having children, or at least he ruled out the possibility long ago. If he had a partner who wanted kids, I think he’d agree, but with a terrifying sense of dread about fatherhood because 1) his parental role models are terrible, and he never had a functional upbringing, and 2) he’s never really liked kids. It probably wouldn’t occur to him that maybe the issue is that he doesn’t like other people’s kids, but his own would be different. That’s why I think his partner would be a fundamental factor in this—supporting him throughout the process and keeping him grounded about his own traumas.

That said, I imagine him as a strict but supportive father, one who sets rules and commands respect but without using violence or verbal attacks on his children. He’d especially try to spare them the awful childhood he endured with his own father. But I still see him as the kind of dad who has rules and expects them to be followed, the classic type who cares a lot about grades and school behavior (he was a teacher for 18 years, after all). He’d probably see certain grades as failures if they didn’t meet expectations. He’d likely be a bit awkward with affection, although he’d find his own ways to make his children feel loved, valued, and accepted. He’d be a present father but would struggle to be fully emotionally open, though he’d likely improve this over time and with effort.

I also see him preferring to have daughters, or at least finding it much easier to bond with a daughter. I’ve always thought that it’s simpler for Severus to relate to women (Lily was his first friend, and the other person he spent time with as a child was Petunia, also a girl. As much as he picked on Hermione, he wasn’t as harsh with her as he was with Harry, Neville, or Ron. He seemed to have a fairly close relationship with Narcissa, etc.). Basically, most of the men in his life have been abusers (his father, the Marauders, Dumbledore manipulating and blackmailing him, Voldemort...), so he’s more at ease, or maybe just more himself, when he’s around women. I can see him thinking that he might not fully understand “girl stuff,” but that it’s better than having a son who’s into Quidditch and facing the prospect of not knowing how to deal with a boy who represents all the typical “boy” interests and behaviors that Severus doesn’t really embody. He’d probably have some anxiety over this—something common among men who don’t fit into stereotypical norms associated with their own gender.

Still, whether he had a son or a daughter, he’d try to provide them with a functional and stable home, where there’s affection and respect, allowing them to grow up with the security he never had. I don’t see him as an “easy” father because he has too much baggage, but he’d be aware of that baggage and try to address it when he realizes he’s messed up. He wouldn’t do that for others, but he’d do it for his children.

[korrasera]

Like I said 'maybe you're too young to know this from experience' and I was right. You weren't too young to know this from experience. Being almost 50 means you really don't have any excuse for your words, you should absolutely know better by you.

I am younger than you, by the way. Not by much, but I actually have studied the history of authoritarianism and it didn't take much work for me to refute what you said above.

When you argue that we need to act more like the authoritarians, when you argue that poor people vote for Trump, when you say that everyone on the bottom just wants to burn everything down and that's why they'll vote for Trump, you demonstrate a fundamental lack of understanding of these topics.

Which is incredibly patronizing. You're acting like a parent without putting in the work to educate people with good facts and reasoning.

In summary:

You can't beat authoritarians by acting more like them. That just makes more authoritarians.

Authoritarians are fundamentally weak and are getting weaker every day.

The fact that we're in a regressive period doesn't change the fact that they're getting weaker.

Poor people don't want to break the system, they want to fix it, that's why the left's base of power is always rooted in the poor and working class of the world.

Fear distorts our understanding of the world and can be hard to overcome.

And you should understand at least some of this if you're almost 50. Good luck in continuing to learn about this stuff.

We tried to warn you, and you wouldn’t listen to us over the sound of your own self-righteousness. You must be so proud of yourselves.

[spite-and-waffles]

I get so infuriated when people reduce Jason's ultimatum to "trying to force Bruce to kill someone to prove his love". The dishonesty of it. Remove all context from the situation and make it sound like an insane inhumane choice. I can do that too actually. Batman is a rich kid who whales on poor and mentally ill people instead of going to therapy. He colludes with cops to bypass due process and collect evidence illegally. He creates child soldiers and makes them into canon fodder for his obsession. It sounds pretty indefensible when you remove every single context and convention that makes a story work doesn't it? Almost like you're only willing to extend the in-universe rules to the rich white manbaby and not the child whose death he was responsible for, huh?

Also? Moral absolutism is harmful and egoistic. You shouldn't kill people, not even criminals, of course not. But that doesn't mean refusing to kill in any situation whatsoever is the moral choice. There's a difference between killing to protect and killing to avenge. Between killing an active threat who will definitely escape and slaughter a family and killing one who is safely contained. Any rule that's taken purely prescriptively and without regard to the individual context of the choice is simply dogma. Especially if the role you have voluntarily taken on requires the willingness to do whatever it takes to do your fucking job. That's why morality isn't fucking black and white.

That's the crux of it for me; why I take this defense of Batman's choices so personally. I don't trust people who see the world in such a black and white way (this includes Jason, who is exactly as myopic as Bruce, but happens to be right about the Joker imo. Fortunately he's a fictional character and also a kid who has not yet had the opportunity to grow, unlike Bruce). I don't trust people who think morality is about a set of correct judgements rather than the process by which you arrive at said judgements. I don't trust people who won't fucking choose. Inaction is complicity, bitch. The consequences of your choices exist and fall on other people regardless of your refusal to take responsibility for them. Bottomline – if your version of "mercy" results in the death and suffering of other people, maybe consider that you're the villain of the story.

[wandixx]

I've seen a lot of different takes on Fear Toxin/other fear causing stuff (Yellow Lanterns Ring or something)(later just called Fear Toxin cause I'm lazy) but here is another one.

Danny seems like he isn't affected by Fear Toxin because his biggest fear is that his accident changed him so much he is no longer human, he can no longer truly experience human things.

So when he gets lungful of fear Toxin, he feels normal. He was antsy before, because c'mon, it's a rogue attack but it's not worse. Or so he thought. Because the anxiety lingers. Not enough to register as abnormal just this slight hypervigilance that makes you see things about yourself and your surroundings that you'd never realize otherwise. He'd realize he doesn't blink as often. He'd realize that if he doesn't consciously focus, he sometimes seems to not touch the ground. Forgets to breathe. He can't feel his own pulse at time. He'd realize people will miss him when he's walking down the street as if he was invisible (people just don't care about everyone they pass by). When he'd look straight into his reflection, he'd look slightly to the left. Not enough to actually name anything that was wrong but just stretched enough to fall on the wrong side of the uncanny valley. If he just caught his reflection in the peripheral vision, it'd be vaguely shadowy creature with glowing green eyes and white smoke instead of hair. Overall he'd be just wrong enough to be distinctly not human.

For everyone else, he'd be just a dude. Literally couldn't find more normal dude than this dude. Will pass as absolutely normal human unless someone is specifically looking for ecto-ghost stuff. Even most magic users wouldn't clock him at the glance

Tldr: Fear Toxin makes Danny perceive himself as some sort of eldritch horror but not enough to make him believe he'd actually be affected, while from outside perspective he's Just A Dude™

[roundrowlet]

FINALLY A POST THAT ACTUALLY CAPTURES HOW I FEEL ABOUT BRUCE AS A PARENT!

I think a lot of the “Make Bruce a good dad” stuff comes from a reaction to the “edge lord that beats up homeless people with 0 compassion” characterization that is often lobbed on him, which yeah, is BAD. But like, you can have a deeply compassionate Bruce Wayne that STILL fucks up his personal relationships.

Everyone always talks about how great BTAS Bruce is (for good reason) but fails to acknowledge that THE WHOLE Point of BATAMN BEYOND is that ultimately, BTAS Bruce pushed everyone in his life away. Some of that was poor character writing (The Bruce/Barana plot line never happened) but a lot of it WAS just the result of how that Bruce was written because, like all well written Bruce Wayne, BTAS Bruce he’s NOT GOOD at interpersonal relationships, and that fucks him up.

That’s not to say I AGREE with every individual instance of of Bruce being a bad dad, their are absolutely times where I think comic writers take it to far and his abuse ebbss to close to the “90s edge lord anti hero” directions, and I do tend to lean towards“softer” takes on his character in this respect personally, but Bruce is ultimately a deeply flawed person and I LIKE THAT. Ultimately Bruce prioritizes the mission, for better or for worse, he sees himself and his own life as secondary to his role as Gotham’s protector, and and that includes his personal relationships.

This aspect of his characterization is not just important to him as a character, its fundamental to understanding his relationship with his other kids, mainly Dick, given that it’s that same very deranged dedication to the mission that makes Dick NOT wanna be him.

When people deny that Bruce is abusive or has abused his kids in canon, what do they define as abuse? Because I comprehend that abuse is the harm of one person to another that can be physical, mental or emotional. Usually it's done out of malice, but you can still intend harm while not being an evil person.

I consider Bruce a very complex and extremely complicated person. He does a lot of good in his city, but he also does bad when it comes to his personal relationships because of his inability to deal with emotions in a healthy or proper manner.

When I think of him as an abusive parent, I'm not thinking of him as a father who doesn't love or care for his children nor am I suggesting he's a horrible and irredeemable person.

I think he's abusive in the sense that he's violent towards his kids when he feels cornered or thinks if they get an opening to fight back it will be a fair fight and his actions will be justified when he doesn't know how to deal with a situation otherwise.

I think he's abusive when he neglects to provide a secure emotional support for his children and pushes them away instead, even when they're trying to reach out to him.

I think his abuse comes in many forms and not always intentionally, but it exists and it will keep happening because he doesn't have healthy coping mechanisms. He doesn't have a normal life, he doesn't have healthy emotional responses and he has too many issues to even start to unpack any of that.

He's far from the perfect parent we all wish he was and he keeps messing up no matter how overwhelming his love for his kids is because he only deals with the problems the city has, never his own.

When you focus too much on something big, you'll end up neglecting other aspects of your life, and in this case for Bruce it means neglecting his family for the sake of a city. And he's a hero, he saves people, he comforts the victims and brings protection to the children of Gotham. Sometimes he will even be a shoulder to cry for the criminals that deserve it. And all of that is too much for just one man, and Batman is no exception.

[idk-bruh-20]

Irondad fic ideas #154

CW: this one's pretty gruesome. read at your own risk 

Peter is a young child who's been kidnapped. His parents and/or his aunt and uncle were killed and he was taken. Along with a bunch of other little kids, he's been held captive and experimented on.

When the Avengers suddenly bust the kidnapping operation, the kidnappers try at the last second to destroy their research. They gas the small room where the kids are being held.

It's Iron Man who ends up blasting through. What he finds is horrifying. All but one of the children are dead.

The one who's left is just sitting among the bodies, crying, shocked, terrified. Iron Man carries him out of there, then once they're safe from the gas Tony steps out of the suit to comfort the kid while he's given oxygen.

Little 5-year-old Peter Parker imprints on his savior hard.

He just went through an unimaginable amount of trauma, then Iron Man burst through like an avenging angel. This is the first time he's ever felt protected in his memory. Tony holds the crying kid, and the kid can tolerate no one else near him.

This becomes a slight problem when they get back to base. But Tony can't find it in him to let SHIELD take the kid away, let them strip him of this one tiny bit of comfort. He keeps seeing all those other kids when he closes his eyes.

This one needs him right now. And if "right now" eventually becomes "this is my son," well. Who could've predicted that.

[pumpkinrootbeer]

i feel like we kinda miss the whole. catalyst for fiona and lips relationship exploding.

here's your older sister, and here's the only person you've ever been able to trust. she tells you to get out again and again and again, even though you're so afraid that the moment you turn around everything is going to fall apart. getting out, and then getting the rest of them out, is your job. that's what your supposed to do.

neither of you have been able to trust your parents and all you have is each other, and she's telling you to get out. and it's either doom everyone around you by staying, or trust her and leave.

and then, right as you're finally starting to find the rhythm of a world you've beed denied access to your whole life, it's because of her, the only person you've ever been able to trust in you entire existence, because of you leaving and trusting, that your five year old brother almost dies. he's comatose. he's covered in tubes. he might never be the same again. the only person you've ever trusted has done the exact same thing your parents did. Put drugs and alcohol and letting loose above the kids their supposed to take care of.

Is it any wonder Lip stops trusting her. That Lip takes the longest to forgive her. "it wasn't her coke she didn't leave it out" she got high around a toddler and left him near the cocaine. left the cocaine where he could get it. the two other adults picked him up and danced with him with coke on the table. Lip walks in on this after spending an entire day trying to rescue their other brother. His little sister is the one who finds their baby brother.

even discounting that in response to this he has to suddenly start stealing food or else all the kids in the house will starve, or that Fiona suddenly jackrabbits into another person he has to care for instead of someone he can trust, or that he now has to care for a 4 year old, while working a job, and being a full time college student on work study, discounting all of that of course Lip looses faith in his sister. Of course he does.

[rotzaprachim]

also like the fact that we can't buy ourselves out of capitalism (very true!!!) coincides with a lot of the weird internalised hatreds i see plenty of queer people having for the way queer culture (and the culture of liberal allies in america) has evolved under capitalism. the ways you survive under capitalism aren't inherently radical, but they also aren't worse than the people who are also struggling under capitalism but being homophobic about it. and furthermore, way too many young queers have this weird issue with viewing queer identity and lgbt stuff as simultaneously too inherently radical to do anything to survive under capitalism and yet as something inherently decadent and bourgeoisie, too inherently decadent and bourgeoisie to expect and extend baseline solidarity about.

take the fucking stickers and enamel pins discussion. yeah in this case aesthetics got itemised as an example of radical politics, which is, obviously, not the case. but then came the fucking backlash - queers aren't JUST the urban libs with stickers on their waterbottles and enamel pins, fuck the urban libs with the stickers on their waterbottles and enamel pins, you know what's decadently capitalist? Stickers on waterbottles and enamel pins! Except that what's sort of missing in this discussion is the way that IMHO stickers and enamel pins are something that's quite cheap to make and also to purchase, and moreover, something that functions both as a way to externalize queer and liberal identities and to pass money around a fundamentally very financially unstable community. go to any of these art shows and community halls and ask the sticker and enamel pin makers of the world and most of them are struggling working class people, in which stickers are a way to bring in a little extra cash. people who buy stickers often make stickers, and they became a way to decorate hardy, reusable items like binders and waterbottles and jean jackets. So no, I'm not saying these items are inherently anticapitalist, but they are a form of art that is also not inherently indulgent thumb twiddling, and it's sort of disturbing to see the backlash among young queer people against their own community.

ditto stuff like, say, the total lack of recognition that there are queer parents and older people in a lot of event discussions (because the community is not solely 18), or "i hate brooklyn/seattle/denver/bay area," or hatred of more middle class clothing and household items popular among queer people because they last fucking forever (reusable glass tupperware, mountain bikes, hiking boots, fleeces) and can be passed around for multiple uses, or queer businesses in conservative areas that use pride flags to literally let people know they will be safe inside, vegetarian and vegan diets in general and hippy vegan meals that are often very cheap to cook, or hatred of like, public art showcases and stuff that's literally free or else hiking groups and community art groups that are also free. idk man. this is again literally not to say that queerness is an inherently anti-capitalist identity, as i don't believe it is, but it is to say that it is not inherently more capitalist, and everyone needs to extend their class analysis a little more

there's also just something to say about queers and jews being two of the most democratic voting demographics in the us voting-wise (after Black people - although there is of course far more overlap between Queer, Black, and Jewish people than people often acknoweldge) and often on the far progressive end of the us democrats and yet the aesthetics of US queer and Jewish existence are considered reactionary and elitest. something to think about

there’s also just a big problem with differences in culture, aesthetics, and lifestyle that are strongly tied to demographics, geography, and ethnicity- and therefor political orientation- instead being read as indicators of class, with things more common among the urban populations, people of color, young women, and Jews - and therefor liberals - being taken as snobby, elitest and upper class while things more common or associated with rural and white people are real, authentic, middle class, and true. In both cases they’re just ways to spend money that often aren’t inherently progressive OR conservative, because you’ll find urban conservatives and rural liberals, but they are also therefor not sole markers of class, which is why I need people to get a hell of a lot smarter with their class consciousness - I’m sick of liberals doing some woe is me business and leftists repeating conservative logic.

there’s nothing inherently more expensive about having higher value hiking gear and fleeces than hunting gear - but only the first is suss. Hiking is not an inherently more upper class sport than hunting. Yeah you don’t get food from it, but it’s also got a much lower start up cost, and it’s a way for people from densely packed urban areas to become nature. People in cities like coffee shops and cafes because they’re places to meet with friends when your apartment is too small to fit anyone - that isn’t an inherently more resource intensive thing to do than have a house in the suburbs or rural areas big enough for everyone to come over! Ditto support for museums and cultural attractions - these are often free or cut price and safe places to take children or spend time on the city. Ditto things for urban areas, especially working class urban life, like bike paths, bike racks, and bike recharging areas. A top quality urban electric bike is often less expensive to buy and then maintain than a cheap car, esp if you’re a single person and single commuter, as many urban people are. A subscription to a local theatre company or indie movie theatre may well cost less than cable and have something every week. Tofu and hummus may cost less than the most classic meatloaf and mashed potatoes. Good walking shoes and fancy headphones may be essential gear for people who walk miles and take noisy public transport. Overall, a lot of the famous liberal excesses of elitest yuppies and urbanites are often fully logical indulgences when taken in combination with living in much less resources intensive housing, in more tightly packed areas, and with greater walking and public transport.

my point isn’t that any of these things are good or bad ways to spend money. It’s the reverse. (A lot of working class and poor urban dwellers are left out of the above, but a lot of working class and poor rural dwellers are left out of the aestheticisrd Middle America working man miasma of single family homes, trucks, and thanksgiving dinner. In both cases this is about the middle class norms.) Nor is it that there are inherently right wing or left wing ways to spend money. My point instead is that America fundamentally has a problem with thinking that the aesthetics of the more rural areas are “good” and understandable whereas the aesthetics and lifestyles of more urbanized areas are elitest and suspicious for things that are fundamentally just different ways to allocate and spend money in ways that are perfectly logical relative to location. Everyone needs to get a lot sharper if they really want to work out what the problems are.

[skeleton-squid-boy]

so now we're retconning things like 5 episodes apart... cool

[al-luviec]

compiled whatever this is (and I run out of tag space)

meh HoT gifs (3/?)

[stagefoureddiediaz]

Thinking about step 9 and the whole concept of forgiveness of one’s self and others and it bringing healing and how bobby and Eddie have been paralleled a fair amount and the idea that Eddie started this process back at the end of s5 with his forgiveness and acceptance of his father but how he hasn’t yet gone anywhere near his mother and their relationship .

How his catholic guilt storyline seems more likely to play on his reltionship with his mother than his father (if his father wasn’t around that much it would’ve been Helena taking him to church etc each week) so the idea of an Eddie - Helena storyline that plays on catholic guilt and potentially his queerness in relation to that has me chewing on glass - it could be so epically good

[ruvviks]

PLEASE DO NOT TAG AS YOUR OWN OC OR PAIRING.

Nathan and Ruben share a bond more powerful than most; mutual understanding through past experiences no one should ever have to go through, and through past actions so horrible they cannot be spoken of. Their grief and the blood on their hands binds them to the STEM technology they created, which has alienated them from the rest of the world— but they give each other the comfort they have both longed for so desperately for years, and that is all they need. They are each other's counterpart; you cannot imagine one without the other, like two sides of the same coin. Through their pain, their grief, their desire, and their regret, they have become one.

anna akhmatova, the guest // bones; equinox // 'i won't become' by kim jakobsson // agustín gómez-arcos, the carnivorous lamb // by oxy // achilles come down; gang of youths // czeslaw milosz, from 'new and collected poems: 1931-2001' // 'extended ambience portrait from a resonant biostructure' and 'migraine tenfold times ten' by daniel vega // a little death; the neighbourhood // marina tsvetaeva, from 'poem of the end' // by drummnist // katie maria, winter // 'nocturne in black and gold the falling rocket' by james abbott mcneill whistler // micah nemerever, these violent delights // body language; we are fury // 'the penitent' by emil melmoth // chelsea dingman, from 'of those who can't afford to be gentle'

taglist (opt in/out)

@shellibisshe, @florbelles, @ncytiri, @hibernationsuit, @stars-of-the-heart;

@lestatlioncunt, @katsigian, @radioactiveshitstorm, @estevnys, @adelaidedrubman;

@celticwoman, @rindemption, @carlosoliveiraa, @noirapocalypto, @dickytwister;

@killerspinal, @euryalex, @ri-a-rose, @velocitic, @thedeadthree