#can I speak my truth. she parentalized lip in the way her parents did to her

[i-hold-deaths-hand-in-mine]

an excerpt from alice's trial in my fic

Alice laughed, but stopped suddenly, looking conflicted. Her lips settled into a frown. “She wasn’t the best mom,” she admitted, despite the hurt it brought to speak the words out loud. “I…I didn’t know what she was doing for me, for our family – to walk the Road to end a curse. That kind of bravery, that kind of love, and all I ever thought about her –” 

She stopped to choke down a cry, then found she was already so empty of words.

Jen wrapped an arm around her. “Two things can be true at once,” she whispered. “You can hold them both together and they can still mean just the same.” Jen tried not to think about why those words nagged at her so much, as though they were also meant for someone other than just Alice.

“Yeah, I guess,” said Alice, unconvinced. It felt so impossible for her to reconcile with, to both acknowledge and understand that her mother was often two things at once – loving, and toxic; dangerous, and safe; berating, and encouraging…

…terrible, and beautiful.  

Perhaps, thought Alice, this was a truth to us all, and a foundation from which we are supposed to build: We can both heal from our parents’ mistakes and walk forth with their lessons. 

We need neither to let go or hold on; just move through the things that make us lighter, and try to find ways to lessen those that make us heavier.

All of the hurt that weighed her down for her entire life – her resentment towards her mother, her inability to form true relationships and connections because she never knew how to be properly loved – was it really possible to just let it go?

Can I be grateful for everything my mother did for me and still feel angry with her for everything she didn’t?

She let out a loud, freeing sob, then buried her face into Jen’s neck when the other woman – after an initial moment of startlement – pulled Alice into her.

I can , she knew was the answer. 

It was a truth she had said so many times – in therapy, to herself, to her mother’s picture, to exes who begged her to admit and confront and move through – but it was the first time she truly believed it, understood it. 

[pumpkinrootbeer]

i feel like we kinda miss the whole. catalyst for fiona and lips relationship exploding.

here's your older sister, and here's the only person you've ever been able to trust. she tells you to get out again and again and again, even though you're so afraid that the moment you turn around everything is going to fall apart. getting out, and then getting the rest of them out, is your job. that's what your supposed to do.

neither of you have been able to trust your parents and all you have is each other, and she's telling you to get out. and it's either doom everyone around you by staying, or trust her and leave.

and then, right as you're finally starting to find the rhythm of a world you've beed denied access to your whole life, it's because of her, the only person you've ever been able to trust in you entire existence, because of you leaving and trusting, that your five year old brother almost dies. he's comatose. he's covered in tubes. he might never be the same again. the only person you've ever trusted has done the exact same thing your parents did. Put drugs and alcohol and letting loose above the kids their supposed to take care of.

Is it any wonder Lip stops trusting her. That Lip takes the longest to forgive her. "it wasn't her coke she didn't leave it out" she got high around a toddler and left him near the cocaine. left the cocaine where he could get it. the two other adults picked him up and danced with him with coke on the table. Lip walks in on this after spending an entire day trying to rescue their other brother. His little sister is the one who finds their baby brother.

even discounting that in response to this he has to suddenly start stealing food or else all the kids in the house will starve, or that Fiona suddenly jackrabbits into another person he has to care for instead of someone he can trust, or that he now has to care for a 4 year old, while working a job, and being a full time college student on work study, discounting all of that of course Lip looses faith in his sister. Of course he does.

[erodasfishtacos]

The Stranger & The Thief (roommate!abo)

prompt: YN needs a roommate but has never been around alphas. Harry is the alpha her parents warned her about.

word count: 9.6k+

author’s note: hii guys. enjoy there is currently six more parts up of this series on my patreon which you can join for $3USD!

+++++++++++++++

YN didn’t mind alphas.

Not at all.

YN had grown up in a solely beta household which meant out of all of her family, she was the only omega.

It was difficult growing up, trying to figure out all the intricacies of her secondary gender when her family had no idea what any of it was or what it meant.

Heat was something that had been tortuous to figure out because she did that completely on her own.

All her parents could do was put food and water outside the locked bedroom door periodically as the heat, the pain, the agony persisted for at least five days before she started to feel relief.

A depression always followed for another week.

Then anxiety would start to consistently hurt her chest in the week leading up to her heat because her body is dreading the impending doom, of being dragged through the cycle with nothing that seemed to soothe the ache for her.

YN logically knew the solution would be an alpha, an alpha would be able to solve the problems that she was able to figure out on her own, in the privacy of her bedroom.

However, she grew up in a community that was mostly consisting of betas and omegas, there were a few alphas but none that would have been an option for YN.

Alphas intimidated her.

They were aggressive, demanding, dominant whereas she grew up around betas and omegas who were nurturing, empathic, patient.

It was two different worlds and though her parents did not speak down on alphas, that had made it clear that they felt like YN should settle for a nice beta.

YN never thought anything of it.

She did not crave an alpha.

Well…only during her heats but outside of that, there was no desire to mate with one.

All of her partners up until this point had been betas, that had been just fine for her, none of them were too serious.

The closest she got to a serious relationship was Tate, a gentle beta who was nice, thoughtful, and everything YN thought that she wanted in a partner.

It had been going strong for a few months when her heat had hit.

Tate had come over to offer assistance like they had previously discussed but it had not worked out well at all.

+

YN was embarrassed, she knew she had to face her boyfriend sooner or later, and she put it off for two more days after her heat.

They met at the coffee shop that was an even distance between their apartments.

Tate’s demeanor was off from the minute he sat down, he refused to look at YN directly in the eye, and he didn’t reach out to hold her hand across the table like he normally did anytime that they were out together.

He was the one who spoke first, “This isn’t going to work out.”

YN’s eyes widen in utter disbelief, things had been going so well up until her heat, “Tate, you cannot be serious. I…I’m sorry I acted that way but I did not know that was how I was going to react! We…I won’t ask you to help me out again but we don’t have to break up over it.”

Tate laughs without any humor, “I truly never thought you were a knot-snob.”

YN tenses at the derogatory term, it felt venomous coming out of his mouth, “Why would you say that? I’ve never even been interested in an alpha!”

He shakes his head, lips curling upwards in the slightest, “Really? Because I came over to help you, brought groceries, other things to help take care of you, and when I walked into the bedroom, you growled at me like you were feral.”

YN swallows harshly, she remembers, very vaguely and almost through a fog but she knows what he is saying is truthful.

“You demanded I leave because I was a ‘poor excuse of a man’ because I was a beta,” Tate’s anger cracks into something more devastated which made her feel awful because that was never her intention to hurt him, she would never purposely do that, “You said that I must be delusional to think I could satisfy you. Only an alpha could.”

YN knows there’s tears brimming at her eyes, she was aware of how nasty she had been to him, didn’t fully remember everything she had said but she did believe him about what he was repeating because it’s what went through her mind.

She remembers feeling disgust at seeing him, none of that love she normally has for him was present in her mind at the time, just pure anger that a beta thought that they could please her.

“We just don’t have to spend my heat together, Tate,” YN tries, she truly liked him, loved him as a friend, and saw potential in loving him as a partner.

Tate scoffs, self-deprecating as he finally meets her eye, “I will never be enough for you, YN. I know you weren’t in your right headspace when I came over but your nature made it very clear that you would never be satisfied in our relationship.”

He takes a deep breath, “You…You were a whole different person when I came to you. I thought omegas were supposed to be sweet, pliant, and gentle during their heats. You were agitated, aggressive, and hostile in a way that truly frightened me.”

“Tate, please,” YN reaches for his hand but he retracts it instinctually back onto his lap.

“I…I am not doing this because I want it to be like this. I saw a future with you, truly, I did. I…I really think that you should be with an alpha because it’d be unfair for you and the beta if you continue to date them,” Tate sighs as he gathers his coat, he does have that same gentleness when he gives her a soft smile, “I do wish you the best of luck, YN.”

++

YN had curled in on herself after that, tucked away into a shell, and has been in there ever since.

It’s been about six month since she’d broken up with Tate and she had made the mistake of asking another beta for help during her heat, it was friend who knew what they were in for but she just had to really make sure that it was unsafe for her to be with a beta before she ruled them out of her dating life.

++

YN was only on the precipice of her heat, hoping that if the beta came while she was still more cognizant that it would go more smoothly.

That turned out to be an absolute mistake.

Trevor was coming with the idea that he may need to leave within a few minutes of being there or he could be staying for the length of her heat depending on how it would go.

She had given him the key to get into her apartment so that he didn’t have to wait around for her to answer the door.

YN unfortunately remembers the events that transpire but even though she was aware during their interaction, she felt out of control of her body as she typically did in heat where she couldn’t stop herself from reacting as her wolf mind wanted her to.

“YN? Are you alright? I’m here,” Trevor calls out, smiling when YN appears in the small hallway of the apartment, “Oh hey, sorry I was late but there was a line at the store -”

YN’s eyes are wild, unfocused, and her hair is already messy from rolling around in her nest that she had spent time meticulously building as she started to fall into her heat, “Get the fuck out.”

“YN, listen we talked about -” Trevor begins easily, undeterred at first by her words.

“What? Do you think that you’re going to help me through this heat?” YN laughs meanly, shaking her head with a sharp, cruel smile, “I can smell you. What a weak fucking scent. A beta comes into my home like they can satisfy my heat. You are a joke to think you could give me what an alpha could.”

Trevor swallowed harshly, trying not to let the words hurt his feelings, his masculinity, the security he typically felt in his secondary gender but YN’s words were meant to gnaw at his insides, make him question himself.

“YN,” Trevor replies firmer, standing a bit straighter despite his hands trembling.

“Beta,” She replies but it rolls off her tongue like an insult, “You are nothing to me. You think I would want pups from a weak fucking beta? I’d rather never have a knot in my life than the little you have to offer me. You will never be my alpha.”

Trevor has to bite back the insulting name he would want to call her, knowing that that wouldn’t be helpful but also that him being here was not going to be helpful nor did he want to stay because he was worried she was about to rip his throat out.

He shakes his head, a sour taste in his mouth at the rejection of the omega, he had already been insecure in comparison to the alphas around him.

However, he had a crush on YN, he was stupid for thinking that she would magically be okay with him supporting her through her heat, and now he was realizing that was an absolute mistake because he felt worse than he ever as has before.

In the moment, that was her goal to make him feel that he was less than and she had succeeded.

“I’m just going to leave,” Trevor tells her as he turns towards the door, his bottom lip was quivering as he hangs his head, trying desperately to rationalize this, this wasn’t the kind, sweet, YN that he normally knew, this was feral at best.

“Good,” YN coos as she stands defensively in the door, her eyes were darker than Trevor had ever seen them and the smile on her face wasn’t one that relayed friendliness, it was like she was about to downright murder him.

Trevor has never moved so fast in his life.

++

YN was lucid enough during that to understand why Trevor avoided her like the plague after that, never returning her texts, and the one time she ran into him at the gas station, well he acted like he’d never seen her a day in his life.

She held no blame or ill-will, the things she said were nasty, cruel, and unlike her normal character but it wasn’t an excuse.

YN sent him a few long messages detailing how sorry she was, how she regretted putting him in that situation because she valued him as a friend but they all got left on read.

After that, she stopped trying to find anyone to help her with her heat.

She deleted her dating apps and pushed off the idea of finding someone else.

YN also went to the doctor for her erratic behavior during these times.

“Heat-Induced Aggression and Rage Disorder,” The doctor had told her simply, unphased by her explanation of her symptoms, “Most omegas can spend their cycle with any secondary gender, even other omegas. However, the disorder occurs when an omega requires an alpha and will become aggressive when a beta or an omega attempts to help.”

“How do I solve it?” YN asks desperately, this meant that she would never be able to spend her heat with someone and she couldn’t possibly imagine actually being with an alpha, she’d never been around one, really.

YN, of course, came in contact with alphas on the day-to-day, it wasn’t like they were rare.

It was that she didn’t have any friends, coworkers, or connections to alphas because she was in such a densely populated beta area before moving to the city after she graduated college.

“You need to find an alpha who’s willing to spend your heats with you or continue to spend you heats alone,” The doctor shrugs without any better explanation, “Unless you wish to take medication to completely stop your cycle but that has major medical risks that I would advise against, especially if you ever wish to have children.”

++

That’s where YN is at, with a disorder that doesn’t have a treatment that sounds remotely reasonable to her.

Searching whether in person or online for an alpha partner was extremely unsafe which meant that she had resorted to the fact that she would forever spend her heats alone, in pain.

It made her jealous when her omega friends bragged about how enjoyable, how blissful their heats were spent with their partners.

YN wishes she loved hers but instead, she finds herself thinking death sounds more pleasurable than forever spending five days locked in her bedroom by herself, a slave to her own nature with no help from anyone.

++ a year later ++

YN was going to pull her hair out, it was official because why was it so hard to find someone who appeared somewhat normal to fill the empty bedroom in her apartment?

For the last three years, YN had lived in peaceful harmony with her beta friend, Eileen.

Eileen had started dating her girlfriend, Regina, right after they moved in together.

Two weeks ago, Eileen had let YN know that she was moving out and in with Regina after their recent engagement which meant that she no longer had any income to help her with the rent nor the utilities in less than a month.

YN could technically afford everything on her own, the lease was in her name but it made money tight enough that she had to budget down to the dollar which she despised doing - it was much more manageable when she had someone splitting the bills with her.

And because she would rather not have to cut back on her frivolous spending like her unreasonable expensive smoothies and sure, maybe everytime she sees a pair of socks that look exceptionally comfy she feels the need to buy them.

However, after a third interview with a potential flatmate, YN thought that this may be an impossible task and she should already start her budgeting because there had been issues with all three interviewees.

The first, beta, needed the bathroom from six to nine pm with no explanation as to why.

The second, an omega, stated that she would need to be able to conduct an in-person yoga lesson with six people every other day in their living room.

The third, another beta, demanded that they split the fridge storage fifty-fifty because their last roommate put milk on their shelf of the fridge which they defined as a ‘personal attack’ because they were vegan.

So hopeless is where she found herself after that third beta.

That’s where Niall comes in, her lovely lovely beta friend who sometimes she worries has rocks for brain and other times he’s absolutely the most brilliant being to ever walk the earth, it just honestly depends on the day.

However, she could kiss him when he arrives at her apartment with a bag of chinese takeout and something to solve all of her issues completely, “I have a mate from work who needs a place. He makes good money so I know he’d have no issue paying his part. He’s cool, I trust him enough to recommend him, I’ve worked with him for like six years.”

YN barely even hesitated, she trusted Niall enough to know that he wouldn’t have offered the solution if he didn’t think that it was a good option for her.

He does get sheepish halfway through, “I…I did forget to mention that he’s an alpha.”

YN pauses at that, narrowing her eyes at him because he definitely left that part out in the initial description.

“Niall-” YN begins to huff because it’s not that she totally objected but it was something for her to consider and he had just left that out.

“I know, I know,” Niall puts his hands up, “He’s cool though. He really keeps to himself. I know you’ve never been around alphas, let alone live with one but I really think it would be fine. Don’t you trust me? Plus, he really needs a place to stay.”

YN really should give it more thought.

“He just texted and said he’d be willing to pay three thirds of the rent,” Niall tells her as he looks down at his phone, “If he can move in as soon as possible. Plus he’ll cover internet and electric.”

YN really really should think on it.

She’d never been around an alpha, let alone lived with one, she needs to think about it, weigh the pros and cons.

“Tell him he can move in on Friday,” YN finds herself saying and before she can think better of it, Niall is quickly typing away on his phone and the text alert goes off.

“He said that works for him,” Niall gives her an oblivious thumbs up before picking back up his container of rice and clicking the movie back on like he didn’t just wheel and deal the quickest decision she’s ever made in her life.

She didn’t even ask his name.

++

YN typically isn’t this dumb.

She actually prided herself on her impulse control and rational thinking but as she flutters around the apartment on Friday evening, trying to make it as spotless as possible for her new flatmate, she really starts to question her own sanity.

YN realizes that she’s going to have to have serious conversations with this alpha about boundaries, what will they do when it comes to their cycles, and the thought that their scents will run rampant because they obviously won’t use neutralizers when they’re at home.

Niall had not given much more information beside the fact that his name was Harry, he was twenty-eight, and had a higher up position in the company than Niall so they didn’t always have much interaction, Niall had actually just overheard a conversation he was having on the phone.

YN finds out that he had lived on his own since college but after his landlord decided he was going to sell the house he was renting, Harry had to find somewhere else quickly, and that resulted in him moving in with a friend from university.

That friend was another alpha, which turned sour very after soon after moving in together.

Niall was a bit hesitant when he told her that the issue was Harry, not the other alpha.

Harry was territorial, more of the pack leader type, and it became apparent within days that Harry simply could not share a space with another virile alpha despite Harry forcing the other alpha to submit to him on multiple occasions, it didn’t matter.

Even though Niall assured her that it wouldn’t be an issue because she was an omega, it didn’t make her feel much better but she has too strong of a conscious to promise a place for Harry to stay to then to pull that away from him.

Of course, Niall, the twat, couldn’t make it over while Harry was moving in because he had to go to a family birthday dinner which meant that it would just be the two of them.

“It will just be time to get to know one another,” Niall chirped easily on the phone, unbothered and oblivious to the tension that was building in YN.

++

Harry was supposed to be here at six in the evening.

He quite literally knocks on the door at exactly six.

YN hesitates for a moment before opening the door, her heart was beating unusually fast, and when she opens it, it begins to pump even faster.

The man standing in front of her was clearly an alpha without her even knowing this information before hand.

It was interwoven into every aspect of his being, in a way that could be seen physically but on the other hand, it was unspoken, she couldn’t quite describe it but he was exactly what she imagined an alpha to be.

All of him was defined, sharp from his jaw to his nose to his arms.

His shoulders were broad enough that YN wondered if he could even fit through the doorway without squeezing them inward.

He was tall, taller than she had imagined him, and that added with his width and the pure heft of his bulky but lean muscles - he was fucking intimidating and could hurt her without a shadow of a doubt, she’d be defensless.

This is a bad idea.

YN should tell him he can’t move in.

Her parents raised her better than to let a six foot something, very capable alpha in her home to share with her without knowing anything about him.

The fact of the matter was, he did not even look friendly.

Some alphas were like golden retrievers, easy going and a bit airheaded.

Harry was the stark opposite end of that.

The type of alpha that people avoid because of how dangerous they can be.

If YN was walking down the sidewalk and he was walking towards her, she would without a doubt cross the road to avoid bumping into him but yet, she was welcoming him into her house and something within her felt like this was a good idea.

Her inner omega that is.

Who we all know craves an alpha like water and air.

She pushes that down, as much as possible when she notices how big his hands are and how they would look holding her hips -

He has a frown on his face, the light wrinkles it causes shows YN that he has that expression quite often as he looks at her with a mixture of boredom and exasperation, he should be so fucking friendly because of how much YN is overextending to help him.

He isn’t.

After a moment, YN realizes she’d been staring at him dumbly and has yet to introduce herself.

“YN?” Harry finally asks and his voice is deep, only like an alpha’s can be, no beta could even imitate the vibrato of that tone.

“Yeah, uh, come in?” YN’s voice is higher pitched than she’d prefer as she steps aside, her greeting coming out much more like a question than a statement.

Harry blinks dully at her, a backpack over his shoulder and a few boxes next to his feet, “If you do not want me to come in, just say it. If me being an alpha or a guy is too much, tell me now before I move all my fuckin’ stuff in. I don’t like playing these back and forth games.”

YN is startled by his attitude, she can’t recall a time when anyone has ever talked to her so bluntly or without politeness which again, inherently an alpha thing but it still had her off kilter a bit as his face doesn’t change.

“No, sorry, yeah. You can bring your stuff in, I haven’t changed my mind,” YN steps further back into the apartment, spreading her arms, “This is it. Sorry, I know it isn’t much but I guess a roof over your head is better than nothing.”

Harry doesn’t even bother to look around, doesn’t compliment the comfy furniture or the cute little decorations, “It’s fine. Where’s my room?”

YN knows her smile falls when she realizes this is going exceptionally worse than she had already been dreading, which means that she leads him around the apartment, showing him the bathroom, laundry, linen closet, and then to his room as he remains completely silent.

When he goes to begin to bring his few boxes in, YN moves to pick one up to help but he stops her abruptly, voice firm and demanding,  “No. Put that down.”

YN’s eyebrows shoot into her hairline, “Sorry!” She apologizes for the millionth time in less than thirty minutes, “I was just trying to be helpful.”

Harry snarls his lip in the slightest,  “Am I the alpha or are you?”

YN’s swallows harshly, voice small, “You are.”

“Right. I am the alpha, I will move the heavy boxes, I will unpack. It is my job, not yours,” Harry tells her as he brushes past her to deposit the box into his room before coming out for the next one without anything else to say.

YN should probably stand her ground, set those firm boundaries but she doesn’t, instead she hides out in her room with her cat, Beatrice, (who was also hiding from the unknown visitor) and does not plan to come out until tomorrow morning or until he’s asleep.

But no, when it’s nearly ten at night, YN finally gathers enough courage to knock on his bedroom door to set the house rules, the boundaries because she couldn’t make Harry like her but they could at least be civil.

Or so she thought.

Harry answered the door after a minute, his shirt was off and he was just in a pair of joggers, there was stuff all over his room that he was obviously in the midst of organizing but it also looked worse before everything fit perfectly into place.

“What?” He asks impatiently, like he has a timeframe and YN is disrupting something major.

YN’s mind goes completely blank for a moment because for the first time since he came in, probably because it was night time and his morning scent neutralizers had worn off but she can smell his natural scent for the first time.

It was stronger because he didn’t have anything blocking his glands, his chest was heavily tattooed, and unfairly defined, looking as if he never spent a minute outside of the gym with muscles cut in places YN didn’t even know muscle existed.

His scent was…unlike anything that she had ever smelled in her life.

It was rich, deep, and dark.

It made her dizzy, sleepy, like she could fall into a trance of getting lost in it.

Thick, warm waves of it seemed to short-circuit her mind and make it hard for her to even remember what her purpose was of standing in front of him.

She had never reacted so strongly to scent in her life, never even noticed most of the time what others smelled like but this was seeping into her veins and she couldn’t quite get enough of it as she tried to subtly breathe it in as much as possible.

“What do you want?” Harry reiterates, louder and definitely more annoyed as he crosses his arms.

YN has to blink a few times before she’s shaking her head, “Uh, I just wanted to go over like….house rules? Anything you need from me? Boundaries? How can we operate around each other since we’re going to be living together?”

Harry jaw clenches, his nostrils flared, and he looks appalled.

YN realizes then that he must be able to smell her and by his reaction, he must absolutely hate her scent which made shame and mortification run through her body, of being rejected by this alpha was absolutely confidence crushing.

YN swallows down the whine.

Harry’s eyes trace up to her once, “Here’s the house rules, stay out of my way, and I’ll stay out of yours. I’m not looking for a friend. I’m only looking for a place to stay. Understood?”

YN’s mouth is dry, her brain is having a hard time focusing on the harshness of his words because his scent is flashing bright sparkles in her eyesight at the same time, “What about your rut? My heat?”

Harry’s eyes narrow, turning a bit predatory, dangerous for a moment before he’s replying, “I’m sure you have help. If you bring another beta or omega here, that will be fine. I will not bother you. Niall told me you do not typically associate with alphas.”

“Um, okay…That works,” YN lies because she really can’t have another omega or beta here but if she has too, maybe she can try again? Maybe if they come over while she’s not yet in her heat? She’ll have to think about that later, “Your rut?”

“I have it handled,” Harry replies defensively, stepping back and putting his hand on the doorknob, “Just give me a heads up beforehand so that I won’t be blindsided by coming home to the scent change but I will also communicate that with you.”

“Okay, that sounds good-”

The door is shut on her without her even being able to finish her sentence.

“Rude ass fucking alpha,” YN mutters under her breath as she shakes her head, when she plops on her bed, she may or may not scream into her pillow for a moment because she just got herself into a worse situation than she could imagine.

But yet it hasn’t once crossed her mind to kick him out.

Why?

She doesn’t have a clue.

++

YN does not see Harry once during the first two weeks of him living with her.

Not even a glimpse.

And YN would actually wonder if he still even lived here if she wasn’t constantly overwhelmed by his scent.

He must come out of his room once YN is asleep, she does not understand how it is so thick, cloying on every surface of her apartment.

The second you walk in, it hits you, and lets anybody who enters know that an alpha lives here, there would not even be a doubt.

YN vaguely finds herself wondering one night as she sits on her couch whether or not Harry had scent marked the apartment, claiming it as his territory.

She had heard alphas do that, especially when they live with their omega to show that their mate has an alpha who protects them and their home.

However, that’s not the case here, and YN is pretty sure that Harry doesn’t even remotely like her, let alone want to live here so why would he want to claim it?

She rules that out as a possibility, mostly, but when she wakes up in the morning and he had already left for the day, well she can’t help but notice as fucking beautiful her house smells.

YN only gets her heat every six months with the suppressant she’s on but the entire month leading up to it, she finds herself starting to get more rooted in her omega tendencies.

Harry had been living with her for fourish months by this point and nothing had changed since the beginning.

He didn’t use the living room, showered early before YN would wake up and was already gone, and stayed out of the kitchen before she would go to bed.

In the four months, the sightings had been few and far between and she realized that he meant it very literally when he said that he’ll stay out of her way if she stays out of his.

In the sparse times they’ve shared space, whether it was in the hallway or kitchen, Harry’s lip would always curl up and his nose twitched which always incited a bit of insecurity about her scent.

She had always gotten compliments on hers, how light and powdery it smelled like clean laundry spritzed with a hint of orange blossom and vanilla.

YN did not understand why it was so unappealing to the alpha but he was in for a rude awakening as the month leading up to her heat began.

Her scent got noticeably stronger, she felt the urge to scentmark more items in her apartment to claim that this was her home and safe space.

As expected, Harry didn’t say anything the day it all started to intensify.

And to be fair, he never said anything to her.

The closest thing she would get was a low grunt of greeting but despite that, she felt safe with him in her home, and never had any worry that she was in danger.

The alpha made her feel an overwhelming sense of security, in fact, that she had never felt with any beta or omega.

It wasn’t necessary that he was mean to her or treated her poorly, he just…was there.

He didn’t bring anyone home with him, never asked if he could have someone spend the night nor has she ever smelled any visitors either.

However, things really start to change in the beginning of October, the month before her heat would crest and peak before the cycle started all over again.

The first major change she would notice was the difficulty sleeping.

Normally, she slept better than most without typically ever having to get up in the middle of the night or any tossing and turning.

When October hit, it felt near impossible for her to fall asleep and then when she was so exhausted that she did end passing out, it wouldn’t be long before she was awake again which made her always feel like she needed a nap.

++

It was late for a weekday, the clock showing that it was close to midnight, and she had to be up for work at six in the morning but her body did not seem to get the memo because after attempting to sleep since ten, it had not been successful.

YN decided to give it some time before she laid back down again.

YN grabbed a bag of pretzels from the cupboard, gave Beatrice one of the squeeze tubes of tuna-flavored goop, and cuddled up on the couch in the living room.

Of course, nothing sounded good as she flipped through the options, and decided on a romantic comedy that didn’t really interest her but it was her best option to make her sleepy, even if it was from the boredom of a corny film.

YN was about thirty-five minutes in when she realized that the movie wasn’t a helpful tool to fall asleep because she was completely interested in the plot line and she was even more awake than before trying to follow the story.

It made her jump in the slightest when the lock turns in the front door before it’s being opened roughly as Harry walks into the small entryway, shutting the door behind him, and beginning to shuck his coat without even realizing she was sitting there.

She hears him grumpily mumble, “Always leaves the fuckin’ television on.”

Which, yeah, she does forget half the time and the other half she feels like Beatrice likes it on for comfort.

Harry looked worn down, tired, and as beautiful as ever.

He had a duffle over his shoulder that most likely held his work clothes and gym outfit because YN was quite sure that after he was down at his office, he went to the gym which he was at for quite a long time.

She vaguely remembers Niall saying that he boxes occasionally for money and that he trains daily which was a pretty brutal routine of working out before work and after work with no time for relaxation in between.

After he’s lined his shoes up neatly against the wall, (YN notices that he also does the same with her shoes that she had half-haphazardly kicked off when she came home from work), he walks into the living room.

It was obvious that he was going toward the television to shut it off but he lets out the lowest growl of surprise when he spots YN tucked deeply into the corner of the couch with a blanket tucked like a burrito around her.

And YN had never heard, in real life, an alpha growl before.

Instead of being scared, she felt the sudden urge to purr, which scared the absolute shit out of her because why the fuck would she want to purr? She’d only done that when she was a pup and never in her adult life.

Why would she want to do that when this alpha was obviously on edge to the point of growling.

“What are you doing?” Harry grunts, voice sharp and annoyed, nostrils flaring as he must take in her smell.

“I couldn’t sleep,” YN replies hesitantly, eyes darting back up to the screen and then to him because his gaze was so intense and accusatory - it was her house, she could be wherever she wanted when she wanted no matter what time.

“Why?” Harry follows up, his arms crossing over his chest, and making his biceps look unfairly big.

YN grits her teeth, debating on whether she wants to give him a snarky remark to mind his business but then she remembers that she has to live with him and would rather not have them on worse terms then they already seem to be on.

“I always have difficulty sleeping the month of my pre-heat,” YN shrugs, a little embarrassed to be talking about something so intimate with someone who likely did not want to hear anything about her personal life.

“Is that normal?” Harry’s brow furrows, not seeming to like her answer to his question.

YN swipes her tongue across her front teeth nervously, “Um, not really. I…I have a lot of issues regarding my heats and that is one of many. Yeah, I see a doctor but there’s only so much they can do, I guess.”

Harry nods in understanding, doesn’t ask anymore questions or even acknowledge her again as he goes about making himself something to eat before disappearing into his room without another word to her which she was used to by this point.

YN rewinds the movie at bit, she couldn’t really focus when Harry was in the vicinity, and his smell was so fucking overwhelming as he obviously hadn’t showered after the gym and was waiting until he got home.

It wasn’t a bad smell, neither of sweat or filth.

No, it was just that his already delicious smell was stronger, darker, and just encompassing every molecule of the apartment.

It takes her a moment to refocus her attention back on the screen and remember where she had left off, vaguely hearing the shower start to run before he’s shutting the door to his bedroom a little more roughly than a normal.

The plot takes a very unexpectant twist at the end and YN didn’t realize that this rom-com had a sad ending which she really wasn’t used to in most films like this.

After working through all the turmoil and drama that kept popping up for this couple, they finally get it right, and the alpha was about to propose to the omega when he got in a car accident, and ended up passing away.

YN doesn’t not even recognize that she is sobbing like an absolute baby until Harry is standing in front of her with a twitch of irritation in his jaw and only in a pair of joggers, nothing stopping her from seeing the bare, defined muscle of his upper half.

“Why are you crying?” Harry asks as he looks down at her, arms crossed yet again.

YN wipes her face with the sleeve of her oversized hoodie, tears tracks surely making her face puffy as she sits up, “It ha-had a really sad ending I wasn’t expecting,” YN nods up towards where the credit were rolling, “Th-The alpha dies and doesn't get to pro-propose.”

“That’s got you all worked up?” Harry sighs as he moves to grab the remote, flicking off the television and motioning for her to stand up, “You need to try to go to sleep.”

“I can’t sleep,” YN nearly whines, making tears start again.

Oh, did she mention she gets unreasonably emotional during her pre-heat?

“Try,” Harry insists and he gently grabs her wrist, pulling her to her feet, “For both of our sakes, please just try to get some rest.”

YN frowns at that, why does it matter to him?

She hates that she feels disappointed when he lets go of her.

“Okay,” YN agrees as she shuffles her feet towards her bedroom, despising that despite how unfriendly the alpha is, she finds herself wanting comfort from him which…it just doesn’t make any sense and she pushes those thoughts to the very back of her mind.

YN veers off towards the bathroom first and by the time she turns to say goodnight, Harry’s already back in his room with the door shut, and she just ends up sighing before shutting the door of the bathroom to use it before she tries to sleep again.

As she sits down, she notices a pile of fabric in the corner near the sink, and out of curiosity once she’s done, she plucks it up and holds it out.

It was the shirt that Harry had been wearing when he came home, the one he worked out in, and it was absolutely drenched in that smell that made YN weak at the knees.

Harry was meticulously clean.

He never even left behind as much as a crumb of a sandwich and so seeing a shirt of his was unusual because it had never happened before.

YN has no excuse for her behavior, doesn’t really even consciously realize that she’s doing it until she’s back in her room with his shirt tucked up into her hoodie.

She pulls it out and pathetically enough, brings it to her nose where it just smells of alpha, comfort, security, and everything she could ever imagine

It feels wrong, invasive to his privacy almost, and she has never done anything like this in her life.

There was something that outweighed all those negative feelings because she finds that as soon as she lays down and tucks the shirt around her pillow to lay her face into, her eyes instantly become droopy and in no time, she’s out like a light.

+

YN tries to push the whole shirt incident out of her mind the next day, blaming it on her pre-heat haziness, and absolutely nothing else.

Logically, she knows she should return his shirt to him, at least tossing it in his hamper but his scent lingered for days afterwards and there was a direct correlation to how much better she had been sleeping since.

When the scent was completely gone, it was like clockwork that YN began to not be able to fall asleep.

It leads her to another night on the couch, another night of Harry coming in late, and being irritated that she was still awake.

“You were fine the last few nights,” Harry notes as his greeting, no ‘hello’ or ‘how was your day’.

YN bites the corner of her lip, lowering the volume a tad on the television, “I know.”

“So why are you up right now?” Harry questions and god, are all alphas this blunt and impersonal or was it just this alpha in particular.

“Because I couldn’t sleep,” YN replies like it’s obvious.

Harry bares his teeth slightly, “Why can’t you sleep?”

“I told you, my pre-heat,” YN realizes that she’s getting a bit defensive because the real answer is much more mortifying and something she would never actually share with him.

He steps in, dropping his duffle unceremoniously, and walks closer to her.

Harry starts to speak slowly, precisely like he’s trying to get YN to understand, “I am not stupid. I understand that. I am asking you, what made you sleep the last few nights? You slept like a rock when I check-, when I walked past your room.”

YN shouldn’t react the way she does but she feels in a way that all the tension between them bubbles up.

Not to mention, it’s incredibly irritating to her how drawn her omega is to him, his scent, his presence, and she fucking hates it because he’s a dickhead.

“I don’t fuckin know, okay? Leave it alone. I’m allowed to be in my living room at whatever hour of the night I please without a fucking interregation,” YN snaps at him angrily, cursing when tears start to drip down her cheeks, and these hormones just sucked, amplifying every emotion she has ten-fold.

Harry lets out a low growl at that, just like the other night, and it doesn’t scare YN once again.

No, for some reason it makes her anger ebb just the slightest.

“Stop the attitude,” Harry replies evenly but his voice was deeper, “I was just checking in on you.”

Anyone else telling her to stop her attitude?

It would have escalated into a nasty fight.

YN instead just deflates, curling up further into her blanket, and covering her face because she just couldn’t get in control of the tears that were streaming down.

He must think she’s a lunatic.

Harry leaves her once again to go shower.

YN’s absolutely praying that he leaves a shirt rumbled on the floor again, despite how guilty that thought makes her feel.

She just wants sleep and for her hormones to even out.

YN feels a bit like a criminal when she goes to the bathroom, soon after Harry had went back out to make himself something for dinner, and there’s a massive disappointment in her stomach when the bathroom is as spotless as always.

She is craving the scent, she knows she can get another fix of it but it would definitely be in his hamper, in his room, and it’s such an invasion of privacy for her to go in there but then again, he’s frying something on the stovetop and he wouldn’t know…

YN’s never stolen in her life, not even gum or nail polish when she was younger, and it’s not even really stealing because she’ll give it back as soon as the scent wears off (but that’s not really true because she hasn’t returned his other shirt and has no intention of it).

She’s already opened his door, quickly scoping out the space, and realizing that his bedroom was the absolute fucking motherload of everything she could ever dream of.

If she thought their whole apartment smelled like him, his bedroom was if you bottled it in a jar, it was thicker, more cloying than ever, and she noticed a purring in her chest before she realized she was doing it and stopped.

If she was completely insane, she would try to grab as much as possible, until her arms are overflowing and she can’t carry out anything else without it falling.

But she’s not that far off the deep end that she did that, she felt creepy enough as she tiptoed over to his laundry hamper and snatched the shirt that was lying on top, the one that Harry had walked in the apartment wearing early.

YN wishes she could loiter a bit longer but that meant a higher chance that she was going to get caught.

She is surprisingly successful as she sneaks back into her room, proud that she now has two shirts to add to her nest.

YN always had a nest, it provided her comfort and security but she absolutely loved that she could intertwine the fabric together with her soft blankets.

This meant she was guaranteed a few more good night sleeps.

++

YN was running incredibly behind for work the next.

She had slept so well that she must have turned off her alarm instead of snoozing iit.

Because when she finally cracks her eyes open, the sun is breaking through her blinds, and her body knows that it is much later than six in the morning.

Her phone confirms that when she clicks on the screen she sees that it is seven-thirty-five.

Any other day, it really wouldn’t be that big of a deal because besides meetings she could make her own schedule.

Of course, of course, she sleeps on the day of an important presentation that she was the head presenter on.

It started at nine which didn’t give her much wiggle room because the commute takes a decent amount of time and that’s if there’s no hectic traffic.

“Shit, shit, shit,”  YN chants to herself when rolls out of bed, glaring judgmentally at Beatrice, and muttering, “You wake me up every other morning for breakfast, but not today, of all days?”

Beatrice blinks slowly at her before she lifts her paw pointedly and nibbles on it.

There’s no time for a shower or the makeup she wanted to do.

The only luck that was on her side was that she laid her outfit out last night after being incredibly indecisive about what she wanted to wear in front of the board of higher ups.

She had tugged her hair up into a loose ponytail that actually passed for the messy updo style, and put on her best push-up bra right after.

YN figured that while she was tugging on her trousers that she could go out to feed Beatrice,  the button was being finicky as it always tending to be so she was looking down as she begin down the hall, and nearly fell backwards when she runs into something hard, warm, and delicious smelling.

Harry’s big hands reach out and wrap around her bare arms, keeping her upright as she yelps in surprise, pants going unbuttoned for a moment as she grips Harry’s forearms for stability and looks at him with wide eyes.

His nostrils are flaring viciously, an irritated growling rumbling through his chest, and he keeps his eyes on her the full time.

They never once darted down to her chest,  that not only was just covered by her bra but was also sheer enough that her nipples were completely visible through the nude fabric.

YN is confused by her own desire to just curl into his chest and feel his shirtless chest against her barely clothed one, and what the fuck.

“Wha-“ YN stammers in confusion, why is he home?

“Why aren’t you at work?” Harry asks pointedly, his jaw was clenched tightly enough that it must be aching with soreness.

“I-I overslept,” She replies shakily, his hands still gripping her arms, fingertips pressing in, “I need to feed Beatrice.”

“No, what you need to do is get yourself dressed. Do you walk around half-naked with every alpha you know? S’indecent,” He’s scolding her like a child as he finally steps back.

YN has been so nice up until this point, despite how wonky her hormones have been.

She’s typically never a nasty person.

She rarely ever gets angry either.

However, today was the wrong day to fuck with her.

“Fuck you,” YN snaps back out of her stupor, much to Harry’s surprise, “I told I was late and I didn’t think you’d be home because you’re always at work by now. I’m sorry I’ve offended you with my body, prick.”

YN turns on her heel, storming back to her room, and snatching up her phone to check the time to see an email notification from her work.

Good morning,

We hope this email finds you well. Our office has to be unfortunately shut down for the next few days due to a major power outage after flooding in the basement of the building. We are estimating a three to four day shutdown. To show our gratitude for your patience, these days will be marked as paid time off. Stay tuned for more information and updates.

Thank you,

Evergreen Financial Accounting

YN feels a huge weight lifted off her chest because not only does she get a few days to relax but now she isn’t going to be late to her important presentation .

However, she does not feel completely relieved because the anger chewing at her over her housemate is just as heavy, even more prominent, and has triggered her inner hormonal omega.

YN fees a flash of defiance which is never a good sign as she usually never tries to rock the boat or cause a stir, prefers to fly under the radar.

No, not today.

YN storms back out of her room because she was going to feed Beatrice in her bra and unbuttoned work slacks if she wanted to.

Harry was sat on the living room couch which was an uncommon sight, a protein drink in a shaker cup, and his eyes on his phone in the opposite hand.

YN goes back into the kitchen, deciding she might as well make herself a breakfast sandwich while she’s at it after she fills Beatrice’s bowl.

She can feel his eyes on her, intense and if it could, his gaze would be burning a hole in her back with how directed and annoyed it was.

YN moves slowly, now that she’s in no rush at all, and she feels stupid for being surprised when Harry lets out a snarl loud enough to echo in the space.

YN doesn’t turn around.

It feels dangerous, she’d learned over and over again growing up to never ever antagonize an alpha, and here she was.

When she doesn’t respond to the noise, it gets louder and makes her ears ring just the slightest, he’s trying to force her attention on him.

Bossy, ill-mannered alpha.

His voice is closer when he speaks, she never even hears him get up.

“Go get some fuckin’ clothes on,” Harry orders,  his voice deeper, raspier than she had ever heard it.

But it also sent a very unpleasant spark of nervousness up her spine because the alpha in front of her was past the point of being annoyed, he was furious.

His shoulders were as broad as they could go, his teeth flashing at her, and his scent was richer, thicker, tinged with a sharp pine.

The playful, brattiness dissipates from her body as his growls stay loud, demanding, deafening.

YN doesn’t realize at first what a bad decision it is to flip her hair over her shoulder, putting her bare bond spot right on display in front of an agitated alpha.

To her utter dismay, he steps forward and their chests are nearly touching, his eyes were now completely focused on the curve of her neck.

When he reaches up, cupping the side of her neck, and curiously thumbs over the spot, YN cannot control the whine that leaves her throat.

His eyes move directly back up to hers, the noise drags him for his daze, and back into reality.

He actually does look her up and down this time, eyes lingering on her chest for a minute before he’s hissing at her once again, “Go get a fucking shirt on.”

With that, he’s turning and grabbing his duffle before storming out the front door, shutting it hard enough it vibrates but then she still hears him take the time to lock it.

Stupid fucking alpha.

+++++++++

[girlgenius1111]

pay for your crimes

part 4! Ona and R get Alexia and Mapi back for trying to play Cupid. Or they try to.

no warnings!

You and Ona spent the morning... busy. You spent the afternoon busy too, but in a different, less sexy way: figuring out how to trick two of the most observant people on the team was a challenge. The two of you decided that Ona would call Alexia and tell her that you didn't reciprocate her feelings. You would continue your radio silence to Mapi, as if nothing had happened. At practice tomorrow, you and Ona wouldn't speak to each other, and you figured Mapi would corner you and try to get you to talk, if she didn't call you immedietly after hearing from Alexia. You'd tell her nothing happened, and even though she'd presumably know the truth from Alexia, she wouldn't be able to admit it.

The biggest problem here was Ona; she was a horrible liar. Growing up, she didn't hide much from her parents, so she didn't get practice then like most teenagers do. You really didn't know how her call to Alexia was going to go.

Predictably, Alexia answered on the first ring, her voice ringing out into the room over the speaker, clearly expecting to be told how good she was at matchmaking.

"Hola Capi" Ona let her voice quiver slightly. You turned away from her, worried eye contact would cause both of you to break into giggles.

"Ona! How did it go?" Alexia's words were said with so much excitement, you almost felt bad. Almost.

"Not great."

"What?" The confusion in Alexia's tone had you biting your lip to keep from laughing.

"We talked. You were wrong, Ale. She doesn't have feelings for me. And I didn't tell her I had any for her. I think it's better we just keep some space until we can be friends again." Ona's voice was filled with emotion, and you knew it was the stress of lying, but it sounded like she was genuinely upset.

"No, Ona that can't be right. I'm... i'm sure she has feelings for you."

"What because of the way she looks at me? I don't think that is more convincing than her telling me to my face that she doesn't have feelings for me."

"No, Ona it's not just that. Its..." Alexia was clearly struggling to not admit that she had firsthand testimony that you had admitted to being in love with Ona. "It's more than that. You just have to trust me, go talk to her again," she practically begged.

"Ale, I already trusted you. It didn't work out that well. She doesn't feel the same way, it's time to move on."

"Ona if you just-" Alexia sounded almost frantic at this point.

"No, Capi. I just need some time okay? I'll see you tomorrow." And with that, Ona hung up, just in time for both of you to collapse into laughter. She'd impressed you, keeping it together well. It turns out that the shakiness in her voice from being dishonest seemed similar to how she sounds when she's emotional.

The two of you had just stopped laughing, and regained your breath, when your phone rang. Seeing Mapi's caller ID flash on your phone literally only minutes after hanging up with Alexia was enough to push you both into another fit of hysterical laughter. You had to let the phone ring out before you could pull yourself together, wiping a few stray tears from your eyes.

"Alright, keep it together, I'm gonna call Mapi back. And Ona, don't you dare look at me or I'll lose it again." Ona took a deep breath, wiping the smile off her face, and turned around so her back was facing you on the couch. You took a deep breath too, before pressing the call button. Mapi answered before the first ring had even finished.

"Hey Mapi. What's up?" You made sure to sound a little dejected, but as though you were trying to hide it.

"Y/n! Um..." Mapi trailed off; it seemed she hadn't really thought calling you through all the way, and she didn't know what to say. Digging your nails into your palms to stop yourself from laughing again, you waited for her to decide what to say.

After a minute she finally spoke. "Patri told me you left the bar with Ona last night. What happened?" She tried to sound casual, but you could hear the serious tone in her voice. Ona turned to look at you, mouthing the words, Sure, Patri told you, before you pushed her shoulder to turn her back around.

"Oh yeah. I was just kind of drunk and freaked out over those weird guys. She just took me home. Nothing happened." You, as opposed to Ona, were a great liar. You knew how to lie, and how to layer a lie; allowing someone to see through what you wanted them to, but not alerting them to what was really going on. You let your voice shake slightly, trying to sound as though you were putting on a brave face.

You were met with silence from the other end of the phone. You don't think you'd ever lied to Mapi before, and she clearly didn't know what to do with it. She would know from Alexia that you and Ona slept together, and had a conversation, but she had no way of telling you that. She was stuck.

"Are you sure, nena? If something happened, you can tell me." Her voice sounded so genuine, so reassuring, that you had to really fight to keep yourself from telling her the truth.

"Yeah, I'm sure. Nothing happened." You cleared your throat, hoping to make it seem like you were fighting back tears. "I'm hungover though, and I don't really feel that good, so I'll see you tomorrow."

You hung the phone up before she could respond, groaning as you sat back heavily on the couch. Ona turned around, pulling your body to lay your head in her lap. She smiled down at you, and you grinned back up at her, admiring the freckles that adorned her face. You were beginning to think they were one of your favorite of her features. She absentmindedly ran her hands through your hair, and you melted a little at the sweet gesture.

"Should I be worried at how good of a liar you are?" She made it sound like she was joking, but you could sense a hint of insecurity in her voice. Instead of responding right away, you pulled her head down, pressing a deep kiss to her lips. When you broke apart, she was gasping for air, her eyes looking slightly dazed.

"As long as I keep kissing you like that, you don't have anything to worry about. I'll never lie to you, Oni. Promise." She returned your smile, before it fell from her face. Concerned, you asked her what was wrong.

"I'm gonna have to lie to Alexia tomorrow. In person. All day." She looked genuinely terrified at the prospect.

You laughed, "You're just gonna have to try your best to seem like an emotional mess and not a lying one." She sighed, clearly thinking deeply about how she was going to approach the next day.

-----

Ona returned to her apartment that night, and you decided you would arrive early to practice, to see if anyone asked you any questions, and Ona would arrive late, to avoid being asked questions right away.

You walked down the hall towards the locker room, thinking you would be the first person there. You stopped when you heard voices, leaning against the wall to shamelessly eavesdrop.

"-don't understand, why would she lie to me? She's never lied to me before, this is not normal." You felt a pang of guilt at the sound of Mapi's voice. She sounded really concerned, and kind of hurt. You reminded yourself that her and Alexia needed to be taught a lesson about their matchmaking, as they were getting too confident in their skills.

"I don't understand why they won't just admit whats going on to each other. I mean y/n straight up told Ona she didn't have feelings for her. They are making this so complicated, and now we have to get even more involved," Alexia sounded frustrated.

"I hate to point this out," Ingrid broke in, although she didn't sound that regretful, "but if you guys hadn't meddled in their relationship, they might have been able to take their time and figure things out themselves."

You didn't have to see Mapi and Alexia's faces to know they were both glaring at Ingrid.

"Helpful, Ingrid. Thank you. Ale's right though, we have to fix it, maybe we can-"

You walked in then, airpods in, pretending you hadn't been eavesdropping. You made sure to keep your gaze down, and your face neutral as you headed to your locker and set your stuff down. You could feel the three girls staring at you, and you pulled your airpods out before looking over at them.

"Hi?" You acted confused, catching them staring at you.

"Hola, y/n. How are you?" It was Alexia who responded, her eyes looking over you searchingly.

"Fine. How are you?" you turned back to your stuff, still listening, but began to pull your training kit out of your bag.

"I'm... fine." Alexia responded slowly, and you hummed in response, pretending to be distracted. The rest of the team started to trickle into the locker room, and you let yourself fall into conversation with Pina and Patri, who, unlike some other people, would never have mentioned to anyone that she saw you and Ona making out against the wall.

You watched Ona walk in out of the corner of your eye, and she sent you a small smile, back turned to Ingrid, Mapi, and Alexia, who were still huddled together in front of Mapi's locker, looking as though they were trying to construct a solution to end world hunger. They weren't paying attention to you, so you sent Ona a small smile back, before turning back to your conversation.

You didn't notice Ingrid clock the looks you and Ona exchanged, or the way her eyes followed the two of you the rest of practice. You and Ona made a game of it, seeing who could make the fake tension between the two of you the most obvious.

You thought you had won when you pretended to hear someone calling your name on the other side of the field when Ona neared the water cooler you were standing by. However, Ona took the cake when she took you out with a particularly nasty tackle that left you sprawled out on the grass, not bothering to apologize, going so far as to step over you before you could get up. The whole team exchanged looks at that one, and even though your body ached from the impact, you really weren't mad; Ona was competitive, you knew this.

Mapi helped you up, shooting a glare at Ona, and you had to hide your smirk in your shirt, wiping off your face with it. You still hadn't noticed Ingrid watching the two of you carefully, whereas Mapi and Alexia were individually focused on each of you.

When practice ended, you headed into the locker room, leaving a couple players out on the pitch to work on penalties, including Mapi and Alexia. As you neared the door to the locker room, you felt a sharp pain on your ear and yelped, feeling yourself be dragged down the hall. You heard a similar yelp coming from the other side of you, but at the risk of losing your ear, you didn't turn around to look for the source. Instead, you let yourself be pulled into the medical supplies closet, turning to face Ingrid, who let go of your and Ona's ears once the door shut behind her.

She looked at the two of you, raising an eyebrow, before she reached out a hand and pulled the neck of Ona's training top down slightly, revealing the many, many hickeys littered across her upper chest. It's possible you had gotten carried away yesterday morning, and Ona had to be careful about which top she wore, as the marks were barely covered by her shirt. Ingrid must have spotted one peaking out. You both blushed, and Ingrid sighed.

"You know that you're driving both of them crazy right? They think they've ruined your relationship, and both of you are going to die alone unless they do something to fix it." You fought back a laugh, and could tell Ona was doing the same.

"This is what they get for trying to play cupid. It could have ended like this, and they need to be taught a lesson. Who knows who their next victim could be," you joked, looking for a laugh from Ingrid, but only finding a serious face. "Oh come on, Ingrid, I heard you telling them the same thing this morning in the locker room." Ingrid opened her mouth to respond, but Ona interrupted her.

"Wait, how did you know?" she questioned, and Ingrid rolled her eyes.

"It's painfully obvious to everyone except those two! The little looks, little smirks at each other when you think no on is watching. That absurd tackle. The only people who don't know are Alexia and Mapi, because they're too upset to notice." Ingrid was shamelessly scolding you both, and you started to feel guilty. She turned her attention to you before speaking again. "You know Mapi cried yesterday when she got off the phone with you? She knew you were lying to her and she couldn't understand what she did to make you not trust her."

It made sense why Ingrid was so upset. She was fiercely protective of Mapi, and even though you knew she agreed with you, making her girlfriend cry was clearly a step too far.

You sighed, "We weren't trying to upset them, it was just supposed to be a little joke." Ona murmured her agreement with your statement.

"Well you did upset them. They both really care about the two of you, and thought they had really messed up. So now you're gonna go march into that room and tell them the truth, before you make my girlfriend cry again. Got it?" Her hands were on her hips, and she was glaring at both of you as you hung your heads in shame, and agreed. Ingrid had a reputation for being a big softie, but she could really turn on the stern when she wanted to.

She led you out of the closet, bringing you to an empty conference room, leaving with a warning to stay put. You and Ona looked at each other, exchanging wide eyed glances, not finding the situation so funny anymore.

"Damn, I really didn't expect them to be that upset," you stated.

"You know, I always assumed Mapi was in charge in that relationship, but clearly I've underestimated Ingrid" Ona mused, shutting her mouth tightly as the door opened again.

Ingrid walked in, with an incredibly confused Alexia and Mapi trailing in after her. You met Mapi's eyes, and she looked so worried that the guilt you felt tripled. Ingrid gestured for everyone to take seats at the table, looking like the least professional business meeting anyone had ever had.

"Tell them what you two did," Ingrid said, when it became clear neither you nor Ona were going to start the conversation. Mapi and Alexia turned to the two of you, confused.

"Well. We did talk yesterday. And we realized that the two of you were both telling each other things, and trying to get us together, and we were kind of annoyed, so we decided to tell you guys that we weren't together. But, we are. We figured it out," you started.

Ona continued, "and we didn't mean to make you guys upset, we thought it would just be funny."

Alexia and Mapi looked back and forth between the two of you for a minute, before saying at the same time, "so you ARE together?"

You and Ona nodded, and the two girls opposite you let out huge sighs of relief. Mapi ran her hands over her face, and you hadn't realized how tense she had looked until you watched it leave her body. Alexia looked like she was fighting back tears, which was incredibly alarming; you'd seen Alexia cry maybe 3 times. You and Ona started spouting out more apologies, but Mapi held up a hand, and you both grew quiet.

"We were upset because we though we'd pushed too hard and ruined your relationship. Can you imagine how guilty we felt? Lying to us was really mean. That being said, we shouldn't have started conspiring together in the first place, and for that, I'm sorry." Mapi was so rarely serious, it was really a sight to behold.

"What happened to the little Ona I knew that used to cry every time she lied?" Alexia was glaring at Ona, and you laughed quietly.

"She used it to her advantage. She had to sound upset to be convincing," you responded, and Ona slapped your arm, shooting you a glare.

"Alright, we've all apologized, everyone knows the truth, are we free to go now," Ona asked, directing her question towards Ingrid.

Ingrid looked between the two of you for a moment, before sighing, and standing up, heading towards the door.

"Fine. But you should probably make sure to cover up those hickeys all over your chest before you change in front of everyone tomorrow Oni." She smirked back at you, heading back into the locker room, as Alexia and Mapi looked at the two of you in horror. Ona made to bolt out of the room, and Alexia chased after her, demanding to see what ungodly things Ona had allowed you to do to her.

Mapi still looked grossed out at the thought, but you crossed the room, wrapping yourself around her in a hug.

"I'm sorry I lied. I never meant to make you feel like I didn't trust you," you mumbled into her shirt. She wrapped her arms around you, squeezing tight.

"All forgiven, nena. I can't stay mad at you. As long as you're happy, I'm happy." You pulled back, smiling at her. You heard a shriek come from the locker room, followed by Alexia's voice.

"My god! One wasn't enough, y/n, you needed to leave 15?" You winced, and Mapi looked down at you, her face once again one of disgust. You shrugged at her, and she wrapped an arm around your shoulders, walking you back to the locker room, hopefully to help you save your girlfriend from Alexia, but more likely to join in on the teasing. You found that you didn't really mind it.

-----

this was.. way more fun to write than I was expecting. hope you enjoyed :)

[vampyrial]

A World For Her Alone | Born of Love

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18

cw (chapter specific): threats of violence, assault, parents talking horribly about their children

summary: Mothers of us, be kind to the fathers on whom we rely.

word count: 4.0k

Claude watched your mother fall to the floor but threw himself down with her all the same. He gripped her by her shoulders, as though the truth he had scoured this house for was only awaiting his anger to draw back from the void as her life slipped away. He called into the hall for help but he sounded not frightened or even desperate but commanding, like his superiors. Like the men who trained him when he was just a child, trying to wield more from his pathetic body than he was willing to give. He knelt on the floor with your mother’s body as she gurgled blood and his grasp never faltered. He looked into the dark, waning pits of her eyes and tried to conjure the answers she’d die with.

Like everything, it was no use.

Your father, having stumbled upon a baffling scene that should have tried the endless patience he held for the lord, still questioned Claude with a gentleness that sickened him. “Was there anything unusual before this?” Your mother lay, already dead, in her bed with the two of them standing at the foot of it. And though he hated your mother with a fervor that begged him to crush her bones under his heel, what angered him more was the fact that the reverence had not ended when he had every reason to believe that Claude had a hand in his wife’s death. The falseness of all of it threatened to overwhelm him.

He allowed it.

He grabbed your father by the collar of his shirt, the man’s body even neglected to flinch immediately, he was that far removed from the harm Claude could do. “Unusual is the entirety of this farce.”

“My Lord–” Your father began, fear only just beginning to darken the edges of his eyes.

“You will tell me what you know of a certain princess and knight I read about in a frivolous story sitting on your shelf.” Claude’s grip did not relax, he flexed his fingers, yearning to curl them around your father’s neck.

Your father’s face betrayed an instant recognition but he held himself aloft from it. “Lord Claude, we all act impulsively when life challenges us this way but let you not sully your own reputation with violence against your family.”

A frenzied and crazed laugh slipped from Claude’s lips and he bared his teeth in some odd approximation of a grin. He could not believe the audacity of it. He was so tired of normal. So sick of it that he could let himself die right then. Still, he pressed on, willing the information from your father’s body as he had done to prisoners before. “Diana’s mother. Who is she?” Your father’s eyes went flat as though he’d recoiled in on himself for protection, already having decided defending himself was not an option. “That…why do you wish to know?” He had stopped pretending there was nothing to know.

“Does she hold it over you, father-in-law?” Claude sneered. “Does Diana use her magic to keep you in her thrall?”

A spark of something ignited and your father was dragged back from the depths of memory. “Diana uses nothing, know of nothing, my lord. Is that truly not apparent to you?” He wrenched himself from Claude’s grip suddenly, holding out his arms in a gesture that signified that he’d tread carefully. Claude allowed him to step back, believing his explanation to follow. “Can you not see her perfect innocence in this? She is above the madness she was born amidst.”

Claude had given him every chance to speak sense, the tips of his fingers were growing cold and numb. The acrid stench of her blood on his clothes and his hands grew difficult to even breathe through, it was everywhere, traces of blood were everywhere in this house. And still he might add more. He unsheathed his sword partially from his belt to which your father did not flinch. “My Lord, I need only know what becomes of Diana, what of her and your child if you act this way.”

What becomes of them? Claude laughed again, the world ebbing with flashes of blurred daylight as he felt himself descend with each gasped breath. He was greeting the pits of madness, he could feel it. Reality was disintegrating again. “I’ll leave here and kill them both now if I don’t have my answers.”

Your father’s expression turned to shock, as though he believed…as though he truly believed in what was sold to him by a self which had retreated. Claude— not the one with a grotesque and near calculable perfection in his single-mindedness, but the one who had been buried underneath, was the only thing left behind to speak but your father did not know him. He could not comprehend that there had ever been a part of him that could not only feel apathy toward Diana but one which could actively hated her. Claude thought placidly that he was soon to sink, collapsed under the weight of this dichotomy and the madness it inspired. “Diana’s mother, the princess.” Your father stared with a sort of wonder into Claude’s eyes, trying to weigh how to proceed in a conversation with a once tamed and now feral animal. “She is gone now, you must have heard it even if before you did not know her significance.”

Somewhere in his memory, he felt around for a name he’d heard but it was difficult, for all of time and thought revolved around this agony. And reality had scarcely moved with the stability it had before, it bisected so that he was of two minds and of two lives at once. Still, he managed to draw a whisper from the depths of his lives. A princess of Siodonna who had been her elder sister’s heir, had succumbed to an unknown illness. The kingdom’s future was uncertain and as his father-in-law and his country at large had ties to them, it had been their concern too. That princess, the immaterial one who had no face and name in face of the consuming thing thoroughly within and without his mind. Nothing had any definition that was not given by Diana’s gaze and Diana treated your mother as her own, the only mother she would ever know. He’d had no reason to care. “She was a mage? She crafted this…” He realized he didn’t know how to describe what it was he was afflicted by. Especially to someone like your father, who seemed like he’d have willingly given in to a life of toil for Diana’s love were he in Claude’s place. “This life.”

“I know little of her work, or I– I knew little. She cast some spell on our princess, perhaps it is so that she gave her this life with you.” Your father compulsively smoothed his clothes out, rearranging himself where Claude had disheveled his neat appearance. “If it is true then…forgive me, Lord Claude but I do not see it as a bad thing. I can’t understand why you would. Is it not a good thing?” He smoothed the lapels of his shirt with a quivering smile. “Something was given to you, Lord Claude, by ordinance of magic that is so very rare in this world. Should you not treasure it?”

Claude could have lunged for him again. Instead, though, he drew his sword in warning. Your father, undeterred, only smiled. “My Lord…No matter what, Diana is a gift to you, whether the princess’ or god’s. Why do you only pretend to scorn her now? Is it out of guilt for her elder sister? She made her own bed, she made it easy for fate to find its way between you. In your love with Diana, she was just happenstance, don’t you think? Wasn’t it always going to be that you two would find a way?”

Another frisson of light and reality rearranged again. Claude was kneeling on your father’s chest with one hand around the man’s throat and the other holding his sword above the man’s head as though he were keen to put it right through his eye.

“My Lord, what is going on?” Felix appeared in the doorway, a hand on his sword which stayed sheathed despite Claude obviously meaning to hurt your father. His voice didn’t sound panicked as it should, he sounded truly conflicted. His eyes flitted from him to your father again and again, his gaze tense but tinged in something akin to…amusement. Yes, it would make sense that he’d be amused by. If Felix hated Claude then he must surely had a father who’d been treating you poorly far before. Perhaps he was debating letting both of them kill each other.

“You may go,” your father replied, placidly. He was panting and clearly a bit afraid but he spoke calmly. “Do not intrude on us, Lord Claude and I were caught in a misunderstanding.”

Felix raised an eyebrow but did not disobey, turning on his heels and closing the door behind him with a click, his pride as a knight long forgotten. Claude would have killed him without a second thought had anything interrupted them, he was tied to a singular desire that was the only thing holding him to earth. Whether it be your father, your knight or his very own child, he’d not let anything stop him. If he did, this life would yet again be nothing but wasted time and wasted agony. He looked down at your father. “I don’t care at all if your mother was a brazen courtesan who let your father knock you about like a disobedient dog if it meant that she could let other men fuck her for position. I don’t care if you feel nothing when you see your wife cold and dead. The cruelty you visit upon your first daughter, that will be repaid. I will see it repaid.” The voice that came out of him was guttural like the call of animal. “But not before I know who put this story to paper. You say you know little of her work but it seems that someone must. Who are they?”

“Lord Claude, pardon me, but if you could find someone to give you what answers you wish to hear…what would it change?” He huffed, struggling to breath under Claude’s weight. “She was never my daughter, that girl. I never felt like her father, she…she was more omen than a child. She was born from me and the misery ever above me. I don’t know who she most took after. If you believe there was a spell that compelled you toward my little princess, then it must have been intended as a blessing for you as much as her. There’s no reason for lies, My Lord, there’s no one here to pity anymore. You could never have loved that girl, it might have been enough for her just to do her duties to you but she was so vicious, so hateful. She has never been innocent a day in her life, always had to be reminded of herself. It would have compounded your misery, that I know, Lord Claude. Believe that I know my own blood even if she has never been held in my arms as a daughter.”

A punch landed on your father’s nose, Claude could feel a part of the bone split. He wished for his gauntlet, wished for the pleasure and ease of watching your father’s face turn into a grotesque portrait of his own viciousness in moments. “I’m not you.” The words came out in a rhythm, like the warning song of a bird of prey.

Your father, with blood all over his face and still gushing from his nose, smiled and revealed the blood on his teeth as well. He was fully crying then, gasping little breaths and squeezing his eyes shut. “No…you’re not me. You have had a fate…that I…might have died for.”

“I will have my way. I must have my way. If not, I will take from you the last shred of that princess you so loved. I will kill them both.” Your father’s eyes popped open, red with blood and terrified. This time, he had no reason to believed that Claude could be swayed from the boundary of anger and a will to see bloodshed done. He took a long and trembling breath in through his mouth, madness defeated under the weigh of Claude’s own. “I saw the book long ago, I’d heard…whispers about it. I bought it from…a common woman’s bookstore, the author called himself…Lucas, I wanted to know…who could know our story so intimately and who could dare publish it but I…I went to where the woman said he’d last lived and he was not there, in fact…it looked like no one had lived there in some time.”

“Where?”

“Right here in this county, I could not believe…across the road from where that shabby little theater is.”

A noise sounded at the door a woman’s voice muffled, sounding pleading against the voice of Felix, giving her what sounded like short and rather curt answers. Your father’s head whipped toward the noise and for the first time, he struggled underneath Claude. “My Lord, I ask that you not let my daughter see this. Whatever you feel for her, she has done nothing wrong.” Claude hesitantly climbed off of him, having gained the answers he’d sought. It had little to do with sparing Diana and more to do with the fact that he could move forward, finally. Claude swung open the door and barged past both Felix and his frantic wife with their daughter in tow, sucking at her thumb. He might not have even noticed there was still blood on his hands if he did not see it in he way their expressions mirrored each other as he walked past. Though their daughter took after Diana most in the first place, fear made them doppelgangers, the sight of him rid his wife’s face of the mature and practiced expression she wore. She looked as young as when they first met.

He pushed past.

“Claude! Oh my god, are you hurt?” She followed after him, letting go of her daughter’s hand trying to stop him from proceeding. “What happened?” She stood in front of him. “Where are you going.

“I’m leaving.” He started to walk around her but Diana put her arms out, moving with him.

“Don’t,” He warned. It was a bit laughable that she was using her body as a shield to keep him from walking away because she presumed he’d not harm her to pass. All the while, the harm he did to her would be negligible in his mind, one drop of her fair, precious blood in a sea of viscera.

“Don’t what? Don’t stop you from leaving when you’re covered in blood?” She cried. “What is wrong with you? Talk to me, please. They’re saying my mother is dead and you…you were there with her. No one will tell me what’s going on.”

“Yes, I was there.” He affirmed easily. A little smile rose at the corners of his lips. “Forgive me, I should be the one to tell you what has been going on.”

She was not soothed but she relaxed somewhat, her gaze growing expectant. She reached out for his arm, perhaps trying to console whatever it was she saw in his expression and the blood drying on his clothes. He took her by the shoulders instead, unable to keep his grip gentle when he had the object of so many miseries between his fingers. His daughter called for him but her voice had simply become part of the chorus of little voices lost to deaths behind him. He did not know her voice from the ones he dreamed of, the voice of the colicky little infant he’d left behind. “Everything in this house has always been for your sake, Diana. Everyone has lived just to give you more but no one paid the price like your sister did. Did you not see that? Or perhaps did you think it was her duty, to be expected that she should survive off of scraps just so that you could have more.”

Diana’s brow furrowed, she did not look nearly as afraid of him as she should have been. She did not approach him with nearly as much caution. “What?”

“Your mother devoted her life to caring for you. Promised to you. Your father holds you like a relic of the past, a keepsake of your mother. But while we’re at it, let’s speak of your mother. They never spoke to you about her, did they? I’ll be the one who does, after all, I am your savior. It is the least I can do.” He stared down at her. “Your mother was poisoning you to keep you inside the house, safe and sound. Did you know? No, of course not, this woman was a slave to your care. What could you think to do other than swallow up her lies?”

“Poisoning me? Claude, you’re not making sense, you’re hurting me.”

“Everything does,” He said simply. “Everything hurts you. Save for the pleasure of your actions. The fallout hurts you, the secret hurts you but never the act. Only how it looks. Did you ever consider your own sister when you spent your days throwing yourself at me?” It wasn’t fair to speak to her of these things as though he had no part in it but what had ever been fair about any of his lives? She could shoulder her share of it. He’d make her. “If it were her, you’d have never forgotten but that’s the point, isn’t it? It’s you so it’s acceptable, you, the poor, sick little darling. Maybe you felt like you deserved it even if you felt a bit sorry, you always came back to that fact. Your mother gave you the chance to excuse yourself this way, maybe you’d have been glad all along to know what she was doing. Maybe it would give you reason to be saved, reason greater than your sister’s.”

Your father came out of the room, blotting his nose with a soaked handkerchief. Diana looked over Claude’s shoulder in horror, letting out a gasp. “Lord Claude. Please. Leave her be.” He was swaying on his feet a bit but Felix did not offer his arm.

Claude paid him no mind. “Your mother was a mage, beloved by your miserable father. I read it in your mother’s diary, it’s still in her room if you wish to read every word your mother inspired. She put a spell on you but your magic was also great, did you know that? Or did you cast this spell on me by sheer will?” He paused, waiting to hear her answer, as though she would give one. He had not realized until then that he wanted her to. He wanted her to have known.

“Let go of me! Don’t do this in front of your daughter, you’re frightening her!”

His fingers flexed, grasping her tighter. “Tell me. Is this love the doing of all that wasted magic buried in a weak body?”

“I truly don’t know what you’re talking about, Claude, please. I love you.” She pleaded, teary eyed. Her tears…for some reason inspired a burning hatred, one that was painful to hold. Tears. She hadn’t earned the right to tears, not for you and certainly not for herself. Their daughter had begun to cry, mirroring her mother. Diana gently called to the girl, trying to calm her while terrified herself. The crying of their child brought him back, reality merged again and he was hearing the cries from a cradle rocked by the wind, this time the hollow between her screams filled by the comfort of a mother she did not have. It enraged him.

“I don’t love you, Diana. More than that, I hate you. More than I ever thought one could hate. This feeling, the misery of laying with you knowing that you reek of the deaths that follow after you…I’d rather kill myself than bear it even once more. You sicken me and I sicken myself for having ever…fallen into you like this.” It came out in a desperate tone, a breathless ramble. “The child with my blood might as well have been born only of you for how little I feel for it. Her birth brought me no joy, because every time I look at her, I think of the child that your sister might have had with me. I love your sister. I love her down to her bones, down to the hollow space in my life that she’s left. You have…again you have stolen it…”

Belatedly, caution entered her gaze. “Claude…” her voice broke. “You don’t mean any of this. You’re ill. You’ve made yourself ill. You need rest.”

He laughed humorlessly. “I’ve never meant anything I’ve said to you until now. You think this is madness and maybe it is! But that doesn’t mean it isn’t me.” He let go of her. “All of it is falsehood and you know it. It was falsehood that benefitted you so you could live with it well enough but no more. I cannot live this way.” He forced himself to leave the anger there, it was of no consequence now, his anger did nothing to save you and was becoming rather indulgent. Only his next pursuit could provide any hope of helping you. And he’d not be tempted from that path for a belated revenge.

Diana went to their daughter and held her, tucking the girl’s teary face into her shoulder as Claude pressed forward, walking down the hall. Your father came over to comfort the two, setting a hand on her shoulder and murmuring assurances which she ignored. “Where do you intend to run?" Diana, who simply could not leave things be called out to him. “Your home is here, your family is here. Whatever you feel now for me…I truly don’t understand what you feel you’ve discovered here but I know that you have always had your regrets and I’m sorry for that. I always sought to be happy with you. But even if I have failed, it isn’t for you to abandon us now of all times. I didn’t kill my sister, I didn’t make her run away. I’m now without my mother and without my sister and you would have me lose you?” She rose to her feet, cautiously, the only sound in the hall being their daughter’s sniffling and the swish of her silk skirts. “Stay. Let a doctor see you.”

Claude looked back at her for a moment. Diana’s gaze held his with fragile hope. She was beautiful in the dull, grey light from the window. Her tears glittered on her cheeks, her white dress was smeared with her father’s blood. It reminded him of you. How many lives you’d spent kneeling at the altar of his sins, waiting for him and still waiting at the end. The innocence of your disbelief worn on your sleeve.

But on Diana, such a look was a profoundly cruel farce. A reminder of just how unearned the tragedy in her eyes was. He felt glad to leave her. He hoped that just once, she’d be made to wait for a husband who would not come, to cling to a promise she knew was already broken, even if in the end he knew it would not matter. Memory is what makes tragedy. For all that happened, the agony is in remembering.

“You’ve never been a wife to me, this has never been a family,” He said it softly, not for her benefit, but because he felt reality begin to waver and his mind become such a fragile and uncertain place. “You have always felt like a trial from god and that child…a shadow of something long gone born only to compound my misery. All of this to punish me.”

Reality melted again, reformed around a memory of you begging him not to leave without you. He knew it wasn't real and still it had been hard to make his way out into the dark without turning back.

tags: @kage-tobiuo @kreishin @rosephantomhive @yeahdrarry @splaterparty0-0 @dear-dairiess @qluvrv @hafsuhhh @eissaaaa @ayolk @doan-19 @fourcefulcupid @ariachaos @cerisearan @irisspade @yaesflorist @jcrml @xiaosprettygf @yevenly @amaris08atoshi012022 @obsessed-with-a-fictional-man @softbummiee @cassanderasblog @waka-babe @bananatwirl@s1mp69 @mitsuyamistress @hottiewifeyyyy @reiko69 @syyyy4ever @pinkpastel-l @dododododooosworld @gwyneveire @mvoonxlightv @noisyenthusiastface @coldpeachkitten @brightykitten @worstliving @kailyan

[maiko-san]

The Chain + TP! Reader (3/?)

< Part 2

Plot : You are Twilight's childhood best friend, who like Twilight can turn into an animal, that is a crow. You just happen to follow Twilight into the portal in your crow form and meet the Chain.

( Fem Reader )

Note : (Y/n) and Twilight are a couple in this fic. Also, apologise that I couldn't include all Links in the conversation but they're there listening.

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"(Y/n)?!" you stand there awkwardly, Link or Twilight stated in shock. "Did you follow me all the way here?!" he asks, you give him a nod as you avert your gaze 'Sorry....' you said. "Oh Hylia...." Twilight sighs as he rubs his temple. The other Links witness the scene unfold as they watch their brother talk to a crow.

"Is it yours, Rancher?" questioned Legend. Twilight takes a deep breath, "Yeah, she's mine" he said as he walks over to you and holds out his hand for you to perch on. You step up his hand as he caresses your head and giving a little scratch on your cheek.

You let out a small coo as you lean into his touch. "You and...." Sky trail as Twilight turns to him, "(Y/n), that's her name" he said. "(Y/n), that's a pretty name. Aw, looking at this reminds me of Crimson and I" Sky said as he smiles at the thought of his own bird companion.

"She has been with me for the longest time" Twilight said, his lips curls up into a smile. "She's my friend" he said, 'and my lover...' he thought lovingly.

"So, it seems we got a new addition in the team huh" chirps Wind, Four and Hyrule smiles. "Well, a friend of Twilight is a friend of ours" Hyrule said. "I wonder how Wolfie will react to this" grin Wild. "I heard that Wolves and Crows have symbiotic relationships! I think they will get along well!" Four chimed.

'Too well...' you and Twilight thought at the same time. "Can't wait for Wolfie to come back" Wind said. A wind blows to your face which causes you to squawk in surprise. You turn your head around to see Epona close to you, 'Epona, you scared me!' you said. Epona snorts and neighs, licking you gently to apologise.

Guess she's happy to see you here. You climb on to Epona's head as you crows, 'It's okay, just don't do that again' you said. "You're happy too huh, girl" Twilight said as he rubs Epona's neck.

.

.

Later that night, Twilight got the first shift. You're still perched on his shoulder as Twilight sits at the edge of the camp so he can talk to you.

"So is this why you didn't want me to come along. They're good people, why didn't you introduce them sooner?" you questioned him, Twilight sigh. "It's not like that..." he said. "It's just, our mission is....much more dangerous and I... don't want you to get hurt...." he said. Twilight was disappointed when you followed him to the portal, but he can't really blame you for it since he wasn't truthful. It would be different if he was honest with you and you would have stayed back in Ordon. He can't really do anything now and has to keep you close to him.

Once the portal to his world opens up, he will send you back home where you are safe from danger, away from evil. Away from Shadow....

"I have a question, Link" you speak up gaining his attention, "What is it, pumpkin?". "Did they really call you Wolfie when you were a wolf?" you asked with a smug look on your face. Twilight raises an eyebrow before letting out a chuckle, "Haha, ah yes they did. They didn't even come up with a better name for me. Dumb isn't?" he said.

"I like Wolfie. It sounds cute" you chirped. Twilight smiles as he pecks at your beak, "Hmm, you're cuter than me, love" he said which causes you to blush. You couldn't help but cover your face with your wing, god why he so romantic?

"Anyways, (N/n). Did you told dad before leaving?" Link questioned, which makes you gasp. "Oh, no! I forgot!" you said, you forgot to tell your parents about leaving to join Link. You didn't even leave a note! They're going to be worried. "Calm down, love. I'm sure your dad understands. I'm sure he knows where you are right now" Twilight said. "Besides, he trusts me to take care of you. He's my teacher after all" he continues.

Twilight notices that his shift is almost over and Four will take over the next shift. He stands up and stretches his limbs, "Time to go to bed" he said. He walks over to the campfire and Four is already awake, ready to take the next shift. "See anything?" Four questioned the rancher, Twilight shakes his head "There's nothing unusual as for now" he said, Four nods as he stands up "Well, I'm gonna stretch my limbs for a bit" he said. "Good night, Twi, (Y/n)" he waves as he takes a few steps away from the camp. He lets you down on the log as he takes off some of his equipment and leaves him only in his tunic.

He doesn't really want to risk taking it all since everyone is out in the wilderness and enemies could attack at any moment, so it's better to leave some on. Twilight lies down on his bed roll as you snuggle yourself on his chest, his hand gently set on your back.

"Goodnight...." he whispers as you reply back, "Hm....goodnight...." you mumbled before dozing off.

.

Click!

Click!

.

You hear a clicking sound, which wakes you up. You open your eyes groggily and let's put a yawn, your feathers puff up doing so as you cuddle deeper in the warmth of Twilight's tunic. It was so warm that it made you doze off again....

Click!

Click!

There it is again.

You snap your eyes open to see Wild holding a slate in his hands, he's smiling and giggling to himself. 'What's up with him?' you thought

Click!

The slate lets out a clicking sound, what is that thing?

"Good morning, (Y/n)" Wild said with a smile, the sun is rising and the first one to wake up was Wild, Legend and Time. You stretch your wings and look down on Twilight, he is still sleeping. He usually wakes up before the sun is up. You were slightly surprised that he hasn't woken up yet, "Rancher went back to sleep since he doesn't want to wake you up" Wild said.

You notice that Wild is cooking breakfast, what is he making? You hop onto the log to see what he's cooking. Seems like scrambled eggs and toast?

"Curious are we? I'm making scrambled eggs and toast for breakfast, want a taste?" he said holding out a small portion for you to taste. "It tastes a little bland since I'm running out of herbs" he said.

You smile, 'Heh, herbs you say? Well, I got you covered!' you thought. You spread your wings and fly away, carrying your bag with you. It makes Wild sadden a little bit when you fly away. This causes Legend snorts, "Oh wow, seems the crow hates it" he said as Wild sends a glare at the veteran.

Finding herbs wasn't that hard for you, you managed to pick a beak full of fresh herbs like basil, rosemary, thyme, chives— you name it. You also found a couple of rupees along the way and stuff them in your bag.

When you return to the camp, everyone is already awake and ready to have their breakfast. You land on the log and crows at Wild, the man turns around to see you're back with something in your beak.

"Are those herbs? Did you pick them for me?" he pointed out. You nod, puffing out your chest in pride, Wild smiles "Thank you, (Y/n)" he said, taking the herbs from you. He looks through them and Hyrule leans in, "Oh hey, there's medicinal herbs here too" he said, picking up a herb.

"Did you teach her, Twilight?" Questioned Hyrule to Twilight, the blonde blinks "Ah, not really. She learned it by herself—" he said. "By herself? That's amazing!" Hyrule smiles, he was impressed that a crow learned about herbs all by itself when you were actually taught by your dad, Rusl. "Yeah, it's amazing that a crow learns about herbs. Is it possible for me to teach it to Crimson?" Sky hummed.

Receiving praises makes you feel pleased and happy, slightly bashful. Maybe you should do this more often?

"I wonder what else she can do?" Legend smirks, putting a hand on his hips. "Does she bring back shiny stuff? Like gold?" he questioned. 'Gold?! Where?!' you squawked, looking left and right. This causes Twilight to look away and scratch his cheek, "I think it's better not to mention gold around her" he chuckles nervously.

[ End of Part ]

[k2padfoot]

Finding Her

Draco x Y/n

summary: The Malfoy’s forbid you of pursing their son after years of a relationship with him. When the war broke out they wanted him as far away as possible from you and your unborn child. Months later Draco learns the truth.

warnings: tad bit of angst, crappy parents, hurt/comfort, fluff.

Rain was pouring down all around you as you raced towards your flat after a long day of work.

Your flat is on the second floor of the building so you made a run for it up the stairs and straight for your front door.

After rummaging through your work bag for your keys you finally unlocked the door and were startled to see Ginny Potter standing in your dimly lit living room.

It wasn’t anything out of the ordinary to see Ginny at your home, the Potter’s have been by your side through so much lately you truly have no idea where you’d be without them. Ginny had always been one of your best friends so when she found out you were about to be a single mother without a job she of course offered her help.

Harry and herself had set you up with an apartment 15 minutes from their home, Harry even got you a job at the Ministry to help with your bills. Ginny being an experienced mother already helped you in many ways to prepare for your child.

“Ginny? My God you almost gave me a heart attack.” you laughed as you sat your bags down and flipped on the kitchen lights.

“So what’s up?” you asked her as you rummaged through the fridge trying to find something to eat.

Ginny had already sat herself down at the breakfast bar across from where you stood, “I know we just saw each other this morning but I had to come quick because this couldn’t wait.”

Your head quickly spun around to face her, “What can’t wait?”

Ginny sighed roughly before continuing, “It’s Draco. He’s at our house—

“I’m sorry but did you just say Draco Malfoy is at your house?” you interrupted her.

“Well if you’d let me finish you would’ve heard the rest.” She said and you nodded at her to continue. “He came looking for you Y/n. He kept rambling about how he’s been back looking for you and that it’s driving him crazy not knowing where you’ve been.”

Your face went flush, “He’s been back?”

“I guess so, and he’s been spending all of his time looking for you. I won’t lie to you Y/n, he’s drunk right now and the only thing he keeps saying is how he needs you. I wouldn’t have came if it wasn’t necessary, he just doesn’t want anyone else but you and we can’t seem to help him no matter how hard we try.” Ginny did her best to explain.

You felt like you were going to break out in a cold sweat any second now, “I-I don’t where I’d start Ginny. He has zero clue about all of this.” you gestured to your pregnant belly, “And I haven’t seen him in over 5 months, what would I even say to him?”

“You don’t need to worry about that okay? Your showing just enough that we can still hide it with an oversized jumper and some sweatpants. All you need to focus on right now is speaking with Draco, I know you don’t want to but I think he needs you Y/n.” Ginny explained.

You exhaled sharply as you thought about the many possibilities of how this could go, “Alright, I’ll change and we’ll go.”

When you arrived at the Potter’s home your feet stayed planted to the ground before you. “Y/n are you coming?” Ginny asked as she opened her front door.

Feeling the bile crawl up your throat you hesitated for a moment, “Y-yeah, yeah of course.” You bit your lip to hold back the bile in your mouth as you stepped into their home.

“Here let me take your coat and I’ll start us some tea.” Ginny told you as she shook your coat off of you and hurried away to the kitchen.

“Y/n? Oh I was really hoping you’d come.” Harry said to you as he exited the living room.

“Y-yeah. So where um, where is Draco?”

“He’s upstairs at the moment. I took him to our guest room hoping he’d sleep it off but that was only an hour ago, I bet he’s still awake up there.” Harry let you know.

You nodded at him before looking up at the dim lit stairwell and hesitantly making your ascend up the steps.

You stopped in front of the guest bedroom, you closed your eyes for a moment trying to prepare yourself to go in. You took a deep breath and turned the door knob which to your dismay revealed an intoxicated Draco Malfoy tossed in the sheets.

“Draco?” you whispered, “Draco are you awake?”

A barley conscious Draco jolted up from the bed, “Huh? Y-yeah I’m up what’s wro— Oh my god Y/n is that you?” He was shocked to see you standing before him nonetheless.

“Hi Draco.” you replied.

“W-what are you doing here?”

You moved closer to the end of the bed he was still sat in, “I came to see you. Ginny was over at my place earlier and she said I was needed here.”

You could see he looked ashamed, “Oh God, I’m so sorry Y/n she shouldn’t have bothered you with this.” Draco tried apologizing as he ran his hands through his messy blonde locks.

You sighed softly, “She didn’t bother me at all. She said you needed me, so here I am.”

He raised an eyebrow at you, “And you actually came?”

“Well yeah, I’m standing right here aren’t I?” you said, crossing your arms in front of your chest.

“I guess you’re right.” he agreed.

Your eyes narrowed in on the man before you, it had been far too long since you’ve seen that beautiful face. “So what’s going on Draco? Why’d you come looking for me now?”

“My mother told me everything.” He explained as your stomach turned.

“Sh-she did?”

“Yeah, she told me how she basically threatened your life. How her and my father made sure you were out of the picture, made sure I wasn’t able to love you.. or to love our unborn child.” Draco told you at the same time he wiped few tears away with his sleeve.

Your eyes went wide at his words, “So you know everything?”

“I do. She told me the entirety of it about two weeks ago and I’ve been looking for you ever since.”

Your heart dropped, “Draco I’m so—

“Don’t. Just- just hold on.” He was saying as he got out of bed, “I’m sorry I’m such a mess.” He apologized while attempting to fix his messy hair and unbuttoned shirt.

He stood before you staring at you in astonishment, “It’s amazing to see you Y/n.”

You smiled faintly at him feeling your cheeks heat up, “You too Draco.”

He exhaled slowly, “God Y/n, I thought you wanted nothing to do with me. I thought you had moved away and started a whole new life.” Draco told you as his eyes began to water once more.

You gasped at the idea of Draco thinking you didn’t want him. “Draco, I’m so sorry. I-I thought I had no choice but to stay away from you, if I would’ve just realized your parents were lying then may—

“Stop, don’t do that.” He interrupted taking a few steps closer, you could see his fist clenched at his side in an effort to stop himself from reaching out for you. “Please don’t try to blame yourself. I should’ve looked harder for you, I just can’t believe you were still here the entire time.”

You let out a deep breath, “I know, but you couldn’t have known the truth.”

Draco nodded as he looked at you once again, but this time really looked at you. “Y/n, y-your belly it’s so, so—

“Pregnant?” you joked.

“Well yes but you are absolutely glowing. I just can’t believe that’s my baby in there.” Draco nervously said.

“Yes, yes he is.”

Draco’s mouth went wide, “Did you just say he?”

You could feel your heart flutter at his excitement. “I did.” you assured him.

“Oh. My. God. Wow, I-I have a son?” Tears brimmed at his eyes as he grinned ear to ear.

You nodded back at Draco, “I was thinking of naming him Scorpius.”

“Y-you remembered?” He could barley say between soft sniffles.

You smiled to yourself, “Of course I did. I just know he’s going to have your gorgeous blue eyes.”

Draco slowly approached you with caution until he saw that look in your eyes, the one that told him he never even had to ask your permission in the first place.

Gently he placed his hands on your belly softly caressing the womb that protected his son. “So perfect.” He whispered. “I can’t wait to meet you.” Draco told the little boy you were carrying.

Without warning his tender hands moved from your stomach to around your waist. Draco pulled you in close kissing you like it was yesterday. It was an intense kiss that made your entire body warm, his lips moved against yours like lightning and you were lost in him once again.

You both finally pulled away from each other to catch a breath when Draco gently cradled your face in his hands, “I love you, and before you say anything you don’t have to say it back. I just need you to know that okay? I need you to know that I love you and I’ve never stopped. I will never ever stop loving you and our son.”

You placed your hands on top of his own, “Well I do have something to say.” You told him as Draco could feel his palms turning clammy and his pulse race against time.

“I love you too.” you said with a beaming grin that Draco immediately reciprocated.

Without warning Draco had swooped you up into his arms and carried you to the bed, gently placing you on it.

You laid back against the sheets as Draco stared at you from above. “My beautiful, beautiful girl.” Draco kept repeating as he softly caressed your face. “My perfect girl carrying our perfect baby.” Draco cooed, his hands gently rubbing your belly now.

Watching Draco in awe of you and the baby you created together brought tears to your eyes that you just couldn’t help but let fall.

You smiled through soft sniffles and tears as you observed him only for Draco to notice you as well. “Y/n/n? Baby what’s wrong? Did I do something to upset you?”

“N-no, no of course not” you tried to tell him between soft cries. “I’m happy Draco, I promise these are just the happy tears.” you smiled through them.

Draco let out a soft giggle, “Good, because I am going to do everything in my power to keep you and our boy happy, to keep our beautiful family safe. I adore you Y/n and I am just so beyond grateful I finally found you.”

“Me too Dray, me too.” You smiled at him.

[calummss]

Miss | Nell Jackson

masterlist

summary: kidnapped your top priority was to make your way back home. meeting nell jackson wasn’t one

pairing : lesbian! nell jackson x wlw reader

words: 1.6k

a/n: first fic on anti depressants so if it sucks take it up with my doctor lmaoo. NOT PROOFREAD

I had a good life. Franky, nothing to complain about. I lived a life others would play dress up as and pretend. I put on the same clothes, only more expensive, and was not allowed to show flaws in my performance. However I never planned on fucking up this bad.

☆‬

The door was left unguarded. Both the men as good as dead if it weren’t for the snoring that could wake up a lion’s den. It was the first time in weeks that they had made a blunder, their ego so high they forgot how low their intelligence was.

‘Come on, Y/n. Come on!!!!’

The chair you sat in let out a squeak as you slowly lifted up your body so that you were standing, bringing your arms to your front by popping your legs through the hole.

‘This will do until now. Can’t fucking untie myself. Why? I can’t waste time on this knot, can I?’ You shook your head, pressing your lips together, lifting your foot and gently shifting your weight. You scrunched your face with every move, so tense with fear you might never leave that room like you had planned over and over in your mind. It was now or never. Your parents surely already alerted everyone. That their daughter was missing. That the heir to the throne had been taken from her castle.

Carefully you put your hand on the door handle and steadily pulled it open until the slit was big enough for you to slip through. Just as carefully as before, you pulled the door shut, breathing out as you heard the door lock. But as you turned around you stood face to face with a woman. She was dressed as a man, her big eyes capturing you as you felt your escape plan crumble.

“What are—“

“Shhh.” You quickly covered her mouth, feeling her hot breath on the back of your hand as your heart began to pound, your chest rising and falling against hers. You pulled back until you saw her eyes again and just as you were about to fall into them you retrieved your hand, bowed your head and apologised.

You raced down the stairs of the tavern, facing the floor as you made your way through the crowd of dirty men, laughing at the jokester. As you went through the door and saw the grey sky, you pondered which way led to the capital, eager to get back to your family. Choosing to go left, your feet snake in the mud. Just as you were going to take another step you heard that familiar voice again.

“Miss!”

You ignored her. Did she know who you were? Was she going to bring you back? You couldn’t risk it.

“Miss!”

You refused to turn around.

“Miss.” You felt her presence next to you as the legs of a white horse appeared next to you. “Are you going to continue to ignore me?”

“Yes.”

“Where are you heading?”

“Capital.”

“You mean London?”

You stopped in your tracks, “What other capital could I be talking about?”

“I can take you.”

“I’m sure you can .”

“London is a two month ride from here. You, Miss, are on foot.”

“I am very much aware,” you stomped ahead.”Wait a minute.” You turned around, standing face to face with her horse before looking up. “You look familiar.”

“So do you.” She fired back, her quickness of it making you unsure if she was trying to jest or if she was speaking the truth.

“I don’t.” You gave her a petty smile, her most remarkable shade of brown eyes never leaving your face as her softened eyebrows pulled together slightly.

“You look like that princess.”

“And I think you are Nell Jackson. The famous highway woman everyone’s been talking about.”

“Have you?” She asked.

“What?”

“Talked about me?” She smirked ever so slowly, her elbow resting on her knee as she leaned forward.

You cleared your throat. “Until recently I suppose I have, why?”

“Just making conversation, Princess Y/n.”

‘I am not the princess.”

“Yes you are.”

“God you are so aggravating, Nellie Jackson.” You spat at her, hoping your nastiness would let her take the hint and leave you alone, even if your journey ahead would be made easier with her help, you couldn’t risk it.

“Don’t call me Nellie.” She sat the same as she had minutes ago. Barely moving a muscle as she sat on top of the carriage that seemed to carry a few more people since you could see more than one pair of eyes glance from behind the curtains.

“Don’t call me princess.”

“Fine.”

“Fine. Good day.”

You lifted your shoes out of the mud and continued treading down the path but the faint sound of wheels and a breathing horse spied your every move. You refused to let her win. After all she was in fact a highway woman. You were a princess. A royal never gave up.

“You sure are stubborn, Y/n.”

“Fine,” you mumbled to yourself before stomping towards the carriage and onto the front seat, sitting next to Nell as she eyed you up and down with that same smirk that made you want to grab them and rip them off. “Take me to London then, Nellie Jackson.”

“As you wish, mi lady.”

☆‬

It had been around three weeks since Nell had offered to take you to London, her accent having indicated to you that she knew the place very well. You didn’t want to admit it but you grew fond of her. You caught yourself taking prolonged looks at her. Whether she was doing some heroic things or simply nothing. She had captivated you. Whenever you made dinner it was the two of you having fun whilst the others kept busy. She taught you how to shoot a gun. You could still feel her body behind you, her arms guiding yours.Her breath clashing with your neck. You stopped calling her Nellie the day you met her, she really disliked it for some reason. Occasionally you would call her Nellie to strike a playful fight that always ended with her hands on your body. Your heart was warming up to these memories. You knew you couldn’t like her but your heart wasn’t in the mood to discuss.

As you were riding through the forest the sudden sound of guns fired into the air, holding your carriage. You pulled back the curtains to see three masked men nearing themselves. Nell jumped straight into action and fought them off one by one but didn’t notice the concealed weapon from the man beside her.

“No!” You shoved her away from your body just as the bang sounded.

Then everything went silent. It was cold, wet, quiet, and so very dark.

“Y/n, wake up. Fuck.”

Nell had nothing but commands aimed at you like arrows ever since you decided to let her take you home. But this request wasn't a demand. It was a need. You had to wake up.

“Why the fuck would you do that, Y/n?” She growled with a deep rasp. “WHY?”

You could sense the shakiness of the carriage as you saw the scenery pass your eyes.

"You're not a god,” you whispered, your throat tight as you struggled to get words past your adam's apple. “I didn't want you to take that bullet just so you could protect me again.”

She stared at you with a mixture of disbelief, anger, and something else you couldn't quite make out. If you could roll your eyes at that present moment you would've. “You don't get to sacrifice yourself for me. Do you understand?”

Why was Nell allowed to let you live but not her? Nell had a purpose in this world and it just got started. Why on earth were you not allowed to die? You shook your head. You didn’t understand.

“Then let me make it clear for you,” she said, the darkness in her eyes fuming. "You would survive without me. You would move on. Her tone roughened. “I can't imagine a world where you and all of yourself doesn't exist. So if you die, you'll take me with you. Your sacrifice would mean nothing.” Her voice became quieter as tears started to pool in her eyes.

Your chest tightened as a tear escaped your eye. It was still so cold, you could feel the trembles that had taken over your body.

“I'm so cold, Nellie.” Your eyes felt like they weighed a ton each, so you closed them, an instant wave of relief washing over your barely conscious mind.

“No," Nell growled, grabbing your face with both of his hands. “Don't fucking close your eyes.”

“I’m sorry I called you Nellie,’ a breathy chuckle escaped your lips. “Nell. Nell Jackson. Nell, nell, nell…”

“It’s okay,” her hand stroked your head. You could see her red stained hands shaking as your vision began to blur. “You can call me Nellie.” She sniffed. “I like it when you call me Nellie. I only pretend to hate it because I like your laugh and sneaky jokes when you thought you were getting under my skin. Don’t die on me, Princess.”

“I feel a bit tired, Nellie.”

“No, no, no. Go faster!” She yelled.

‘Come closer,” you said, Nellie’s face inching close enough so you could kiss her. ‘In case something happens.”

‘Nothing will happen, baby. Nothing. Just stay awake, okay.”

‘Okay. I will try.”

[httpsdana]

84 Jude bellingham with a Brazilian reader PLEEASE

Sal o Azúcar ?~Jude Bellingham

*GIF isn't mine. credits to the owner*

I PUBLISHED THIS AND REALIZED THE REQUEST SAID BRAZILIAN READER. IWROTE THIS AS SPANISH IM SO SORRY. EITHER WAYS I HOPE YOU ENJOY <3

you can request from my prompt list

this is my master list

players/drivers I write for

84-“as much as I love listening to your native language, you know I can’t understand shit.”

warning: this is google translated spanish

"why wouldn't you let me help you" Jude whined, following y/n around in the kitchen

"Jude. I've told you this a million times before. I cannot fuck up tonights dinner. this is the first time your parents are coming over here to Madrid and you helping me isn't gonna be the best choice" y/n repeated, sighing at the boy who was following her around

"that's really offensive" Jude mumbled, sitting down on the countertop

y/n knew he wasnt actually sad, but she was right about everything she said. Jude wasn't the best help in the kitchen

"you can help me by bringing me the ingredients when I want them" she suggested making Jude's face lit up

he nodded excitedly, jumping off the counter and standing next to her.

She started preparing the dinner with Jude standing next to her. The soup she was preparing needed salt and needed to be stirred well and she shouldn't stop the stirring

"Jude. salt please" she said, urging him to rush

He grabbed the jar of 'salt' and gave it to her. y/n, without looking, grabbed a big amount of it and put it over the soup, and continued her stirring

"thanks babe" she said, smiling at Jude. He pressed a kiss on the top of her head, and stood beside her until she finished everything for the dinner

"Denise. Mark. its so good to see you guys again" y/n said, hugging the couple in front of her

"come on in. Jude is just getting dressed" she led them to the living room

"of course he's still late. I wonder if you're the one who waits for him when getting reafy for a date" his dad joked, making the three of them laugh

"I heard that"Jude said from behind, annoyance evident in his voice, but a smile was plastered on his face because of seeing his parents after a few months

He gave them both a hug, and they sat down for a chat

"I actually helped y/n with dinner" Jude said proudly, making his parents laugh

"oh no. how did that go?" Denise asked, making Jude put an offended hand on his chest

"it was alright. I didn't let him do anything beside bringing me the ingredients" y/n said, making his mother laugh

"that was a good choice. when he was young I had to beg him to leave me cook alone" she said, making her husband and y/n laugh

"that's not true" Jude gasped, making them laugh harder

"enough talking about how bad Jude is in cooking, how about I serve you guys dinner?" y/n got up, leading them to the dining room

She went to the kitchen, with Jude following her

"that wasn't nice" he pouted, making her chuckle

"well...we were only speaking the truth" she shrugged, placing her hands on his chest, his hands placing themselves on her hips

He just laughed, and leaned down, pressing his lips on hers. Before he had the chance to deepen the kiss, y/n moved back and pushed him away

"stop your parents are waiting for the food" she turned, grabbing the pot of soup

"take this. and I'll bring the rest" she gave it to Jude

They all sat down for dinner. y/n filling up the bowls of soup for the parents

Denise had the first sip of her soup, before she started coughing hard

"everything okay?" y/n asked, worried something might had happened to her

"honey. I think you're mistaken between the salt and sugar" she said, making y/n turn to look at Jude. He had an awkward look on his face when his girlfriend glared at him

"you gave me the sugar instead of the salt?" y/n asked, making Mark laugh out loud at his son

"how was I supposed to know its sugar instead of salt?" Jude said defensively

"Joder, Jude, ponemos la sal en el tarro azul y el azúcar en el tarro rosa." y/n said in an angry tone. before realizing she was speaking spanish instead on english (fucking hell Jude. we put the salt in the blue jar and the sugar in the pink jar)

Jude looked at her dumbfounded, before speaking up

“as much as I love listening to your native language, you know I can’t understand shit.” he said, making his parents chuckle

y/n let out a sigh, rubbing her temple before turning to his parents

"I'm really sorry guys. I promise he won't be entering the kitchen again" she glared at Jude

Denise shook her head and said everything was fine

"I think the rest of the food has sugar instead of salt too, how about we order some pizza?" Jude said with an awkward smile

They all laughed, before nodding

"let me do the talking. I don't think your spanish is good enough to order a normal pizza" y/n joked, grabbing the phone from Jude's hand

[heroes-among-us-all]

hello! could i request for hcs where bakugo has a clingy babbly girl who always bugs him by following him around (bonus points: THEY'RE NEIGHBORS) and says she loves him all the time but he always just scoffs and ignores her then one time she ends up giving up or getting hurt and ends up distancing herself in the process and he starts to seek her out oMg you can take it from there IM JUST SO HAPPY YOUR ASK BOX IS OPEN YOURE MY FAVE BNHA IMAGINE BLOG AHH

I made this into a scenario instead of headcanons. Hope that's ok!

From the moment you moved into the house across from his, you'd already decided that you would stick to Katsuki like glue.

You just couldn't help it. After all, he stood out from the rest (even if it was in a bad way at times), which made it almost impossible for you to keep your eyes off him. He was headstrong and brave, not to mention incredibly attractive. Before you'd realized it, you were crushing on him hard.

But being the kind of person that you were, it didn't occur to you to try and hide your feelings. Instead, you clung to his side and made sure to seek him out at every available opportunity. You were incredibly thankful to have made it into U.A, because it allowed you to see him during class as well.

At the beginning, Katsuki thought you would give up and get bored of pestering him after a while. He clearly didn't seem to realize just how strongly you felt about him.

No matter how often he scoffed at you or told you to get lost, you were still right there, grinning at him ear-to-ear.

"I love you, Katsuki!"

Words that the average person struggled to say fell from your lips without so much as a second thought. The first time Katsuki had heard you say you loved him, his eyes had gone wider than ever. He even wondered if you were just playing a prank on him or something.

She's such an idiot, he thought. She doesn't even mean that. It's so dumb.

He'd long since convinced himself that you were just some ditzy girl without a serious bone in your body. That was why, even when you kept on insisting that you loved him - more than anything, as you so often stressed - Katsuki didn't take it to heart. He never stopped to actually consider that you were telling him the honest and unfiltered truth.

Until the day you got upset with him.

"Quit it with that sappy shit," he snapped. "I'm tired of hearing you spew the same garbage all the time."

It was just like any another day. You were clinging onto his arm and gushing about how much you loved him. As much as Katsuki wanted to say that he'd gotten to used to this by now, the truth was that he hadn't. Every time you hugged him or got extra close and said those kinds of things, he could feel his chest getting tight and his cheeks burning. Even if you were just running your mouth without meaning what you said, it was still embarrassing as all hell. And despite what most people probably thought, he did get flustered.

That was why he lashed out at you. He was fed up with being the only one to get worked up while you said all that stuff without even batting an eye. It wasn't like he actually disliked you or anything. Far from it, in fact. Even if he wouldn't admit it, you were the person he considered closest to him.

Perhaps that's why he felt comfortable speaking brashly. He'd always done it until now; why should today be any different?

Needless to say, dejection was quick to sweep across your face. You looked weary all of a sudden. You weren't smiling the way you usually did.

"Okay," you said softly. "I'm sorry. I just thought... I don't know. But I'm sorry. I should've taken the hint by now."

From that day onward, you didn't say a single word to him. You breezed past him in the hallways without so much as glancing his way. You didn't bother asking to walk home with him the way you usually did. Even when your parents came over to hang out at Katsuki's place - since your families were on good terms - you didn't come along with them. You purposefully stayed home, as if you no longer wanted anything to do with him. You were avoiding him. Did you not like him all of a sudden, or what the fuck?

Katsuki had always been stubborn, even as a child, so it took him a while to come to terms with the fact that he missed having you around. He missed having you cling to him and smile like you didn't have a single worry in the world. He missed seeing your cute face and feeling your arms wrap him in a hug.

Katsuki had liked you back for a while, but he was just too hardheaded to see it.

After finally coming to the realization that having you around was something he wanted, Katsuki did what he'd never done before and sought you out himself.

He managed to corner you during lunch, in the cafeteria, so that you couldn't try and pull a fast one on him. As expected, you refused to so much as meet eyes with him, but when Katsuki put his mind to something, he couldn't be deterred.

"You're done ignoring me," he frowned, grabbing you by the hand. Even though you tried to protest, he held on tight. "I need to talk to you. Aren't you going to hear me out?"

Katsuki didn't even realize it, but his gaze was nowhere near as confident and assured as it usually was. In fact, it was almost as if his eyes were pleading for you to stay. He really, really wanted you to stay with him.

Luckily, you'd always been the better person. Certainly a better person he was.

You nodded slowly. "Alright. Let's talk."

Relief couldn't even begin to express what Katsuki felt. For a moment, he thought he might faint from the stress. He was worried that you were seriously done with him for good. But you were giving him another chance, and this time, he wasn't going to screw it up.

Katsuki gripped your hand as tightly as he could while the two of you walked out of the cafeteria together. His eyes scanned the surrounding area, searching for someplace quiet and secluded. Confessing his feelings was actually a much more frightening thought than he would've liked to admit, but you were special to him. For you, he could set aside his petty pride.

After all, you were worth it.

[bluegalaxygirl]

Amnesia (KidKiller X Reader) P12

Plot: After an explosion reader wakes up in a hospital with no memory of the past few years, her parents want to take her home so she can recover and get back to a normal life while the Kid pirates want her back on the ship where she belongs.

Warning: Bad language, Medical stuff, family issues, abuse and Violence.

Reader is Female, Poly Relationship, established relationship, Kid X Reader X Killer, Reader is a member of the Kid pirates and is in charge of the money, Budgeting and negotiating the best price.

< Previous part .... Next Part >

A voice calls out to you, the voice of your mother sounding concerned and slightly panicked soon turning into anger when another voice, Kids voice speaks up, you can't make out what their saying until the room becomes clear. Its only been a few seconds since you zoned out but it feels like you've been out for days by how groggy you feel. "Y/n, sweetie, there you are" Your mothers smile comes into view as her hand gently guides your face to look her way, blinking a few times to get yourself to focus, reaching up to place your hand over hers thats presses on your cheek your relieved to feel she's real. "Hay, you ok?" Kid asks still leaning on the bed with one arm this time making no attempt to touch you or even lean your way, your eyes travel over to look him over with suspicion, that memory although pleasant sparked alarms bells in your head. They needed your skills, thats what your father said, is this what he meant? They needed your smarts? "Y-you let me handle the money?" You ask looking at Kid with knitted brows, when they first told you about being in charge of the money you thought they were lying but its clear now that it is the truth, there's a couple of problems with this though, it still doesn't confirm weather you stayed by your own will or not. Why did Killer let you do it? You were a stranger, sure you helped them out and did work around the ship but looking through someones fiances is different,your suspicion grows wondering if thats why they kept you around.

They were struggling with money at the time and having someone do the work for them and having a rich man's daughter on board would benefit them but how did they know? Did they figure it out or did you let something slip? Its clear from your actions that you had a good education especially in business, you should have realized sooner, in the south blue education comes in two forms, the cheep version, which only the average person can afford, only contains basic Reading, Writing, History and Geography, anything more than that the price goes up so only the Rich can keep climbing the ladder, maybe that's how they knew. "Yea, like we said your in charge of the money and how we spend it" Kid states his look of concern soon turning into a frown since your face hasn't changed, he thought this realization would make you believe him more maybe even agree to come back but it seems to have the opposite affect making you grow suspicious of him "See i told you" Your mother growls wrapping an arm around your shoulders and pulling you into her with no resistance, in fact you uncontinuously move closer to her trying to get your mind to make sense of it all, Kid's shoulders slump as his hand grips the sheets, seeing the look of dread on your face makes his heart break "W-what? What the hell are you talking about? What did you tell her?" Kid growls slowly becoming angry and turning his gaze to your mother who strokes your hair holding your head close to her shoulder "The truth, you only wanted her for the money and her brain. You took my daughter away from me, from her family who love her and appreciate her" Your mother growls making Kid see red, the captain goes to yell at your mother only to hear a small laugh leaves your lips leaving both of them looking at you confused.

Pushing away from your mother she lets you go while raising an eyebrow unsure of what your doing or what your thinking and in truth neither do you but you can't help it. "You can't be serious?" A strange smile forms on your face one that portrays disbelief, something brews inside of you but you can't tell what it is, all you know is what ever is about to come out of your mouth is something that needs to be said, no matter how cruel or rude it is. "Love me? Ok maybe i can believe that but… appreciate me? I've been nothing but a disappointment from the start, you and father have made that perfectly clear" Your mothers face drops but her brows knit together in hurt and anger, she goes to say something but you cut her off by holding up at hand showing your not done yet "I did everything i could to please you and it wasn't.. I will never be enough, I'll never be pretty enough, skinny enough, fair enough for you. I was cast aside the moment you found out i was girl, for god's sake mother, Do you realize how insane you are? How far you went? What you did to me? You hurt me, held me down, watched me bleed and beg for you to stop and at the end of it all, all you could say was how pretty i looked in earnings. You know maybe, just maybe if i was captured by pirates it would be a better life than coming home to you" Your voice shakes as it gets louder unable to control the words flowing out of your mouth and the tears forming in your eyes, Kid's eyes widen taken aback by your words, he heard it was bad but this was some psycho shit, he's proud of you though seeing you stand up to your mother, this whole time you've ether been too scared to say anything or acted prim and proper, your acting more like the woman he knows which brings a smirk to his face.

Your mother's mouth opens and closes a few times a look of shock covering her face as tears form in the corners of her eyes, you can't tell if she's sad about what she's done to you or that you've outed her. A huff of a laugh makes you turn your attention to Kid, your eyes glare at him as your face twists in anger seeing that stupid smile on his face, a proud one, as if he's won something "What the fuck are you smirking at? Your no different" The smile instantly drops from the captains face, its very rare that you get angry and sometimes your anger can rival his so it unnerves him when you direct that anger at him. "Storming in here, demanding things, taking over just like they do. I may like having you and Killer around but for all i know it could be some form of Stockholm syndrome. I mean i shouldn't like having you around, all you do is argue and fight with everyone around you, resorting to violence when you don't get your way, you know the names fitting. Just a Big Kid who throws a tantrum when ever his toy get taken away" Your yelling gets louder as you slowly get up from the bed standing in front of the tall red head with your fists balled up at your sides, you don't know where this anger is coming from but its overwhelming and the need to hit something is strong but you won't hurt either of them. "I'm trying here N/N, I've held back for you and your not a toy, Y/N i-" Kid growls threw gritted teeth his anger starting to boil over at your words, you've never spoken to him like this before, yes you've had your fair share of arguments and fights but you've never insulted his character before, you've called him hot headed once or twice but nothing like this, he also can't believe you'd think of yourself as his toy or his property.

Stepping closer you poke his chest stopping the captain from continuing, but he makes no move to stop you or throw hands with you "Trying? You call this trying? Even with a compromise you still find something to fight about, to yell about. Heck neither of you nor the other two even considered what i would have wanted or maybe waited until i was wake to talk with me about it, you only thought of yourselves" Pushing past him you grab your sling and wrap it around your arm and neck making sure its tight enough before heading to the door "Where are you going?" Kid turns anger and worry mixed on his face while your mother quickly stands up taking a step closer to you "Sweetie please, your hurt, you can't leave" Gritting your teeth you turn to the two a warning glare in your eyes making the two stop in their tracks "I'm going for a walk, I'll come back when you both short your shit out. Leave me alone" You sneer glaring at the two before leaving the room and slamming the door behind you, those two are doing your head in, fighting over every little thing even with a compromise in place and it's a stupid one too, what you don't get a say in the matter? You don't get to make a decision in your life? With a sigh you stop walking and take in a breath trying to calm yourself down, it felt good getting all that out but at the same time your heart feels heavy and your mind is still all over the place, taking in deep breaths you managed to get your breathing back to normal and your shoulders to relax, your surprised that with all the tension your shoulder isn't hurting but that could just be the adrenaline.

Looking around the dim corridor only being lite by a few small lights on the wall and the moon light coming through the windows of open rooms you start to notice that all the room are empty, its strange but then again it is a privet hospital on a resort island, it must cost a lot to get here and then even more to get treated. The halls don't look all that different to your room, same color scheme, paintings and a few tables outside rooms, each room is an exact copy of the one your staying in and its at that point you realize how lost you are, you didn't look where you were going and don't remember how many turns you took or how long you've been gone. The sun was almost set when you woke up and now the moon is out "Whatever, just keep walking, i'm sure I'll hear their yelling soon and it'll guide me back" You mutter to yourself starting to walk down the halls wrapping your arm under your sling as a way to comfort yourself, you don't want to go back to your room but maybe you can hang around the area until they leave. How did things get so complicated? You believed your parents, then you believed the pirates and now your stuck in the middle trying to figure things out. You don't know who to trust, you can't trust your parents because their known to lie to get what they wan, you can't trust the pirates because well… their pirates and you can't trust anyone who works for the hospital since your father differently owns a part of it. There's no one else you can turn too, well maybe the nurse, she seemed ok with telling your farther off and standing up against the pirates, she doesn't seem like the other doctors here, and she has your best interest in mind.

Speaking of the angle in white her voice calls out to you from down the hall making you turn to see her running over to you "Y/n, what are you doing out of your room and alone? Are you in pain? Do you need anything? Come lets get you back" The nurse whispers with concern placing her arm around your waist lightly guiding back down the hallway not waiting for an answer, you don't resist instead walking alongside her starting to study her face and body language. Its strange you don't even know her name but you trust her "Can we talk? In privet" You ask stopping in your tracks suddenly, the nurse looks at you with confusion but nods guiding you into an empty room and helping your sit down on a chair before pulling over her own to face you "Let me guess, their arguing again? I'm sorry Miss Y/n i really thought a compromise would help" The nurse sighs her eyes glazing over with a sad look, you don't blame her for suggesting a compromise, it's a good idea just too bad it didn't solve the arguing problem. "It's ok, i just had to get away, try and figure things out.. also, please just call me Y/n, i never got your name, I'd like to call you something other than nurse" You ask letting out a nervous laugh feeling bad for asking since you've seen her everyday since you woke up and don't even know her name "I'm Melody Blackburn but everyone just calls me nurse, even the staff, I've honestly just started introducing myself as such" She lets out a laugh while rubbing the back of her neck seeming shy about it, which is strange for someone who seems so confident. "So what is it you want to talk about, i promise what ever you say will stay between us, patient confidentiality"

You nod explaining what happened before and how angry you got, she listens close nodding along giving you reassuring smiles when you look up at her from playing with the fabric of your shirt "I'm no psychologist or therapist but i can try and help you sort out your thoughts, even if it doesn't solve anything i'm sure it will at least help you to relax" with a small smile you nod feeling tears starts to form in your eyes but you hold them back refusing to cry at her kind gesture and hope of relief. "Thank you but I don't know where to start" Your heads a mess of concerns, facts, feeling and something else you can't quite describe, its like your mind and heart are fighting each other while also fighting themselves making you even more confused. "How about we start with feelings, leave facts out of it or actions just… tell me what you feel towards your mother" The nurse smiles hoping to bring you some comfort, at first you shrug feeling unsure of how you feel but Melody gestures with her hand for you to take your time. "Dejected, Regretful but hopeful that she can change" You sigh unable to think of anything else, it's hard to put words to your feeling towards her. "And your farther?" The nurse asks but is slightly taken aback at how quickly and easily you respond, its easy to describe how you feel towards your father even though you hate yourself for feeling that way "Hate but I admire him and there's this need to please.. i hate myself for it" Your words come out as bitter practically spitting them out behind a clenched jaw.

Melody nods taking in your words before asking about the next person "Ok.. Captain Kid?" She's almost hesitant to ask, words pop into your head but their not the right ones to describe what your feeling, maybe what your feeling doesn't have a word to it "Nervous yet safe, excited and there's something else but i don't know what its called… I feel it around Killer too, he makes me feel calm, protected but cautious along with that other strange feeling" Melody nods thinking for a second before leaning forward looking you over with conflicting emotions "Could you describe it to me?" Gulping you shrug unsure of how exactly to describe it but there's no harm in trying so you try your best to answer "I feel my chest tighten but its warm and it doesn't hurt, my stomach feels weird and sometimes i hear my heart pounding in my ears… some times i can't look away, I end up studying their faces or mask" A smile forms on your face as a laugh escapes your lips thinking about the two, its strange, you were and still are mad at them but the thought of them makes you happy, the nurse leans back with a smile admiring your face as the sadness and anger it once held disappears. "Your memories may be gone but feels can still remain, i'm hesitant to tell you exactly what your feeling only because i don't want to freak you out. Do you want me to tell you?" Thinking for a second you take in her words wondering whether you should know or not, is it something you should figure out on your own or is it better if you know? "Once were done I'll decide, is that ok?" You ask still not sure yet.

Melody nods giving you a reassuring smile before continuing on "How about you tell me what their like, for example how your parents used to be and how they are now" It doesn't take you long to get going on that, you remember the time with your parents, well except for your 18th which is still a mystery "They have changed but flip back and forth between the new loving version and their old selves. My mother can still be her controlling self, make comments on how i look and not care if something is causing me pain, only prioritizing my face and how i look, but now she hugs me, hold me, cry's over my injuries, tells me how much she loves me and misses me, she's always quick to be at my side at the slightest flinch of pain, she's never done that before." It brings the tears back just thinking about it, despite all the things she says and the fight's she starts with the pirates she still seems to care. "My farther still doesn't seem to care, always reading his newspaper and ignoring me, but he fights for me and stand up to pirates for me, he got the marines to drop the charges and brought me here to a privet hospital on some resort island, he even forced a smile for me, not even my mother gets that" You sigh trying to catch your breath after the long rant, leaning back in your chair you look out the window at the still rising moon "But i don't know whether all of it is real or put on, their good at acting like everything is great and amazing when it's not. They've lied in the past and i still can't tell when they are and when they aren't so i don't know what to believe" You whisper almost scared to say your thoughts and feeling out loud but you have too in hopes to actually get somewhere or get some help.

The nurse listens on keeping quite until she thinks your ready to move on, her face doesn't show any disbelief, in fact it shows more of a hidden understanding making you wonder if she's gone through something similar but before you can think too much she's asking about the pirates "I know you don't fully remember Captain Kid and Killer so just tell me what their like now" a slight frown forms on your face while crossing your arms over your chest the argument from before coming back and what you said to Kid, you still feel bad for saying those things but to be honest it was something that needed to be said. "Their pirates, and like you said their ruthless, its easy for them to lie and get what they want. Kid always picks a fight with one or both of my parents, he's abrasive and rude, he hovers over me like i'm gonna up and run at any minute and yet… i find myself leaning into him, he's careful when touching me and lends me his coat when i'm cold, today he held my chin and when he pulled away i had to stop myself from pulling him back." A sight leaves your lips as you run your hand through your hair trying to get your head straight, you shouldn't want them around but you do, you want them to hold you but you shouldn't, its starting to make you dizzy as your mind goes round and around in circles. "Killer's sweet, he seems the calmest and is the first to notice when something is wrong, weather it be physical or mental but its easy to lie when the person can't see your face, I don't know what he's thinking or feeling, he's seems smart and calculated, what if he's making all this up? Making it seem like my parents are the bad guys, and he's just the sweet caring boyfriend? He may be calm but i can sense he's just as bloodthirsty as Kid"

Thinking your finished Melody goes to say something hoping to help only for you to look down at your hand and continue in a whisper, she has to lean closer in order to hear what your saying "I'm scared of making the wrong destitution. Once i'm better i have to decide weather to go with my parents or go with the pirates." You didn't mean to say it out loud, not wanting the fear to be true but it is and you'll have to deal with that, the nurse scoots closer being careful not to touch your legs with her own while taking one of your hands in hers, she squeezes it gently prompting you to look up at her seeing the sweet smile on her face "I understand your scared and there's no problem in being scared but you still have time to decide on what you want to do. I honestly think your thinking too much about this, trying to make everything fit perfectly into place and its just going to make you more stressed. I know you want hard facts, i can see it but trust me when i say your gut knows more than your head" Squeezing your hand she stands up making you raise an eyebrow, her kind smile never leaves her face as her other hand reaches up to wipe away a stay tear you didn't even know had fallen "Trust your gut, trust your feelings and thinks will soon become clear. I will make sure you have a day off tomorrow, no visitors, no conflict, just time for you to rest and let your mind settle. Wait here until i come back, I'll make sure everyone is gone so you can rest" With a nod of approval form you, the nurse removes her hands from your heading to the door only to stop when you call out to her "Wait… What's that feeling called?" You ask finally deciding that you do want to know, the nurse turns giving you a much bigger smile making her eyes shine in the moon light "Love"

[heyidkyay]

And I'm petrified of being alone, now |

Part Seven

Matty Healy x reader

Summary: She’s just trying to get by, really. What with being a single parent to her four year old son whilst simultaneously trying to kick start a successful career as a radio presenter. She’s got everything she’s ever wanted though, friends close by, a mum who’s merely a phone call away, and of course her baby boy. What else is there to wish for? But then, it’s not long before her relatively normal life gets upended and turned on its head, and she’s suddenly forced to deal with situations she’s never even thought to imagine.

What happens when one mention of a certain controversial singer on her show sends a flood of unexpected challenges her way? 

Authors Note: Another part, honestly so amazing to see how much this series is getting already! Means a whole lot, thank you. Just a quick note though, there will be msgs exchanged in this part so the green text is reader!

Masterlist

"Teddy!" I called out as I chased after the toddler currently streaking through my living room, the boy shaking water droplets all over the place like a wet dog.

I had only turned my back on him for a second! Simply to grab a new wash cloth from under the sink, but Teddy had taken the opportunity, quite literally, and ran with it, having darted out of the bathtub within the blink of an eye.

And now, the absolute menace was running rampant through the flat, cackling away without a care in the world, a little hellion in the making, whilst I fought to keep up with him.

In truth, it wasn’t exactly how I’d pictured spending my Saturday morning, but the life of a single parent was always so eventful, full of many surprises.

But, speaking of surprises- I huffed in defeat just as my phone lit up with the sound of a new notification. I rubbed at my temple before I glanced over towards where I'd left it, perched on the arm of the settee. I watched as it buzzed again, then again, before my eyes finally returned to Teddy.

The little tyke was now standing across the room from me now wearing a bright eyed smile, he mimicked me when I arched a brow, forcing the both of us into a right old fashioned standoff.

"You’re a terror, you know that?" 

I gave a soft shake of my head, hiding the small quirk of my lips from my son’s view before ambling over towards the sofa to pick up the phone, my eyes only flickered to Teddy once I'd steeled my own expression. Though, his grin had only seemed to widen at my words.

"You have until I'm done with this..." I told him whilst gesturing towards the mobile, "To get your bum back in that bathroom." I pointed a stern finger at him, but it did nothing to hide the laughter dancing in the kid’s eyes. "Got it?"

"Got it." Teddy parroted, and he nodded once before running back down the hall.

I could only groan loudly and look to the ceiling when I heard Teddy’s footsteps go on a little too long, and didn't flinch when the slamming of the toddler's bedroom door echoed throughout the flat.

"Teddy!"

The only response my warning tone got was when I heard a buoyant giggle and I chuckled quietly to myself before lowering my body down onto the edge of the armchair. I was only twenty-three but my rumbustious son seemed to have aged me beyond my years, my knees aching as I finally settled in.

Flipping the phone the right way up in my hand, I watched as the screen brightened before a small hum escaped me.

A text from Matty. Or rather, several.

Messages now Matty:)!! I'm just about ready to kill Jamie If anything happens, know that I'll be halfway to Morocco by the time the Old Bill show up at my doorstep He's had me up since four, Squeaks Four!! It's completely inhumane Just made a break for it! Hiding out in a musty old broom cupboard but I can still hear him bitching And get this, he won't even let me skive off early to buy a bloody penguin! Can you believe that??

I snorted at the absurdity of Matty’s many messages. 

Not that it wasn't anything too out of the ordinary for the musician. Yesterday, he'd had me up until gone two, nattering on about the batty old bird- his words- who lived in the house beside him. She had the tendency to pound on whichever wall was closest with her heavy metal cane (apparently the thing was an extension of her left arm) whenever she thought he was being 'too rowdy'.  It was safe to say they didn't get on.

The texts were something that had started up right after Matty's impromptu visit earlier that week. Though I sometimes struggled to keep up, and often ended up leaving Matty waiting on a reply for a long while when I grew too busy, I found I didn't mind them. 

In fact, I think I rather enjoyed opening up my phone to find yet another text waiting for me. They never failed to make me smile, either. Something which both Finn and Adi had not failed to take notice of.

I rubbed at the bridge of my nose whilst I thought up a reply, then frowned when I spotted a couple of stray Playmobil figures hiding under the tv unit. I exaggerated a stressed sigh, having only just tidied up in here an hour before.

Well now I know where you'll be hiding out if worst comes to worst BUT What if I break under interrogation? Or they make me out to be your accomplice?? Idk if I’d do well under pressure, Matthew Besides I quite like Jamie, reckon I'd miss his texts if you ended up killing him off He also has a strange knack for the paper's daily crossword.. But I can't disagree with you on the timing, I'd be on the verge too What the fuck needs doing at four in the morning?? And also I can't believe I even have to ask this, but what kind of penguin are we talking about here?

I was only slightly disappointed to find out that Matty was, in fact, talking about the chocolate bar, and not a horde of Antarctic birds in the next text that came a minute later. I hurried to fire one back.

What's wrong with a good crossword! And don't get all jealous on me, Healy, he likes to ambush me some mornings when I'm on my way into work I guess the early mornings do make sense though, life of a rockstar and all that ALSO of all the chocolates you could possibly choose from, why a penguin?? Honestly criminal.

I had to toss my phone back down onto the cushions then, knowing that I'd left Teddy alone for far too long already and that, if I let him, Matty would probably keep me distracted for as long as he pleased. 

I heaved a massive sigh as I pulled myself back onto my feet.

"Teds, you better be dressed by the time I get there!" I shouted out and laughed quietly to myself when I heard the little boy squawk in retort.

--

The old Victorian style fireplace, which warmed the entirety of Finn's flat, was the one thing I truly envied most in the world. 

It was a pretty thing, opulent and shapely. It stepped out from the white wall Finn used to hang a majority of his canvased photographs on and had intricate little carvings etched into its fine wood trim, swirls and staggers that always managed to capture my attention. I was drawn to every quaint detail it had to offer.

I only just managed to draw my eyes away from it when my phone vibrated against the jean of my upper thigh, picking it up then proceeding to chuckle quietly to myself as I moved to type up a quick reply.

Clicking it off a second later and feeling rather content, I looked up to grab my mug from off the coffee table, which hosted a vase full of vibrant daffodils, and paused when I felt the daunting gaze of the man I was seated with fall upon me.

"Alright there, Finn?" I questioned as I drew my limbs back in slowly.

He merely cocked a brow in retort as he relaxed further into his preferred seat, one no one dared touched now that we knew better.

"You tell me. Who's got you grinning like that on a Saturday afternoon?"

My lips tugged upwards unconsciously, something I was quick to hide behind the rim of my cooling mug. "Dunno what you mean."

Finn rolled his eyes so hard I was honestly a little concerned for his well-being, but then he spoke, "You know exactly what I mean. Come on, tell us! Is it that Healy bloke?"

Tongue in my cheek and drink cradled in between the palms of my hands, I huffed a light laugh but was fortunately saved from answering that particular question just as Teddy bounded in from the kitchen.

"'Pen."

I blinked at the biscuit packet that was currently being shoved, rather forcefully, into my face, before taking it from my son's tiny grasp. "Open, what?"

Teddy's brows pinched as he jabbed a chubby finger at the package in which I now held. "'Pen that." His t's sounding a lot more like d's. 

Finn, the twat, snorted over in the little corner he’d made for himself and immediately tried to cover it up by clearing his throat. Teddy, as smart as he was though, caught it all the same and gifted his godfather a crinkly eyed smile. Me? I glared halfheartedly.

"No, Teds. I meant, what do you say after asking for something?"

"Ta."

I withheld a far too exhausted sigh and purposely ignored the muffled giggles now spouting from my best mate.

"It's thank you," I reminded for what felt like the millionth time, even though I knew it was all in vain. It seemed as though my son had been spending far too much time with the irresponsible Northerner sat across from us. "And yeah, that’s correct, bubs, but only after. What do we say before?" 

Teddy glanced upwards at the ceiling, lengthening his already impossibly long lashes, as he pondered away. 

I was forced to wrinkle my lips in a futile attempt to dampen my ever growing fond grin and listened to my son hum obnoxiously before his whole demeanour suddenly shifted.

"'Peas! I say 'peas!" Teddy exclaimed excitedly, bouncing on the balls of his feet.

Proud as ever, I smiled and opened up the packet for him, handing them back over.

"Good lad. And what do we say now?" I coaxed whilst pulling Teddy in closer to peck at his forehead and card a gentle hand through his curls.

Teddy peered up at me and grinned, all toothy. "Ta."

I shook my head amusedly at the boy before sweeping him swiftly off his feet and settling him onto the sofa beside me. Playfully, I blew a loud raspberry into Teddy's neck and decided that it was better for me to pick my battles. Especially with a child I knew had inherited my own string of stubbornness.

"Where's your auntie anyway? She knows she's not supposed to be giving you treats after you've just had lunch."

Teddy wrinkled his nose as he happily munched away on the procured biscuits but didn't bother with a verbal response, simply extended his arm out towards the door.

"Oi, Wells!" Finn called out for me and grinned when he heard Adi's muffled acknowledgement. "You better not be in there eyeing up my tarts!"

A bang was heard before a ruffled Adi appeared, sweeping back into the room with an air of aloofness. "You're a right tease. What’s the point in making them if they're only there to look at!"

"I already said that you could have one when they were ready!" Finn retorted whilst Adi marched her way across the rest of the living room to flop down into the armchair beside him. "They need to cool." He tutted.

Ads groaned unhappily.

I blew out a light chuckle as my eyes flickered towards her slumped form before swiping away a few stray crumbs that Teddy had created. "You just ate, Ads." 

"And? I was told that there'd be tarts for dessert. Here I am, and no tarts to be had!"

"Yet!" Finn added, exasperated now, and I snorted quietly to myself whilst the duo continued to bicker back and forth, as they tended to do whenever they were together.

"Mad, aren't they, Teds?" I whispered mockingly after having leaned in closer to my son's side.

Teddy merely held a biscuit up in retort and so I bit into its edge, grinning as I chewed away. "Ta." I winked in conspiratory.

Teddy giggled before his attention was caught then again by my exuberant friends.

I could only release a breathy laugh as I watched on too, before startling slightly when my phone sent a ring of vibrations echoing down my leg. Which always left my bones there feeling all weird and tingly.

Messages now Matty:)!! How important does a person have to be before they're assassinated vs. murdered??

I forced my eyes shut momentarily at the outlandish question, but couldn't quite control the full fledged grin that blossomed.

Matty over text was rather different to the person I’d met in real life, I’d already decided after having only texted him for a few short days.

He was just more... open? Forthcoming? Candid, perhaps. He was incredibly inquisitive about everything I mentioned, even the little things, and a whole lot less reserved than the man I remembered meeting at the studio for the very first time. Matty loved to send a million messages at once and then pick out all the best bits of my reply to respond to. And would text me at every and any time of day.

It had been quite the change of pace at first, I hadn't expected much from Matty asking for my number, figuring it was just playful jealousy at having been beaten to it by Jamie. And even after I’d given it to him, I thought I might just receive a simple text to say that he hadn't forgotten our short-lived encounter. 

But no, Matty was almost animate in all of our conversations, he always had a witty reply, or an anecdote to bring up and ponder over.

It had, quite rightly, made my head spin after receiving the first handful of texts. I really hadn't been expecting such a vast contrast and had even gone as far to question whether Matty had typed in the correct number. But it hadn't taken me all that long to get used to it, I actually rather enjoyed being the person Matty sent all of his strangest thoughts to.. Or at least that’s what I told myself.

Messages now Should I be worried?

Matty:)!! What's that meant to mean?

You're quite the figurehead?? Should I be prepared to cancel any future plans of mine to make time for your imminent funeral?

Matty:)!! God no! Actually wait maybe Can never be too sure can you? Death is a very unpredictable thing, Squeaks Unless it's premeditated Then I suppose you're asking the right kind of questions Whilst we're on the subject though, will you make sure that there are crows at my funeral? And a mysterious woman stood in the far back with a sturdy umbrella Oo and cake! Lots of cake Make sure Ross is sat upfront too Can't have him making a proper scene at my wake Probably still manage to make it all about him though SOMEHOW Wouldn't put it past that tosser So with that thought, be a dear and make sure his invite gets lost in the post will you? X

I snorted at the cluster of texts that seemed almost never ending. My phone buzzing against the palm of my hand at a mile a minute, often before the last vibration even had a chance to cease.

Before actually knowing The Matty Healy™​​, I never would have once pegged the gritty, solemn rockstar we had all seen plastered across the morning papers to be such a massive melodramatic diva. But now, I honestly couldn't picture him any other way. 

Can get behind the cake, but why crows? And this woman, how mysterious are we talking here?? Yet to meet Rossward but am sure he’d be a blubbering mess if you popped your clogs and didn't invite him to your funeral babe Can just picture it now, WHAT will the papers say!? Also are you prepared to face his wrath when he eventually follows?

Matty:)!! Make sure it's something shit like red velvet or coffee or something And crows add to the overall sombre Plus my mums terrified of em Woman’s got to be incredibly mysterious BTW I want the whole shebang Sunglasses, trench coat, high heels and one of those massive fuckoff floppy hats I'd ask you to try and aim for a rainy day as well but that's almost a given And tell Ross I'll be there waiting!! Reckon my ghost could pin his in a fight

"She's grinning again." Adi sang, causing my distracted gaze to snap up and see the mischievous glint in her eyes.

"When's she bleeding not, whenever she's on that thing!" Came Finn's unhelpful addition, he flapped a hand haphazardly towards the mobile I held. "It's like we aren't even here!"

"'m here!" Teddy announced solemnly, having since finished his biscuits, crumbs dusting the corners of his mouth and rosy cheeks. He shuffled over towards me then and planted himself firmly in my lap to peer closely at the phone's now dimming screen.

I stifled a heavy groan at the sudden weight and silently winced instead, my nose wrinkling with it. Adi laughed loudly. 

"Who that is?" Teddy asked me, already reaching out to run his grubby little paws across the screen. I steered him away, whilst the faces sat opposite us lit up like a bonfire in August. I hastily buried the phone in my back pocket.

"Yeah, Mouse. Who was it?" Adi prompted unnecessarily, a vicious smirk tugging at the corner of her mouth- more than amused. "Don't leave us in the dark!"

I bit down a few snipping words, feeling them bounce against the back of my teeth, and instead opted for drawing Teddy's attention elsewhere. "Ready to head on over to the park now, monster?"

Teddy beamed at the very idea and squirmed in my hold to be let down. I let him go, but only after lightly tickling at the boy's sides.

"Go on then, grab your coat and trainers for me, bubs."

Without a second thought, Teddy dashed off towards the hallway where his shoes sat neatly by the front door.

Slowly, knowing there was no use in trying to avoid it, I turned towards the two idiots waiting expectantly for me and gifted them both a drawn out sigh.

"You each get one question before Teddy comes back. Make them count."

Adi squealed and tugged her feet up onto the armchair in her anticipated excitement. Whilst Finn chose to stare long and hard at me, obviously debating on just what to ask exactly.

The briefest of seconds passed before Adi went to open her mouth, a question on the tip of her tongue. But Finn cut her off with an outstretched hand and gestured her closer.

"We'd like to configure." He informed me with a sly smile before angling his body inwards to whisper in Adi’s ear. 

I narrowed my gaze, not liking this at all. But carried on watching them closely whilst the duo murmured back and forth. It was then that I heard Teddy fumble with something out in the hall and grinned triumphantly. 

"Time's running out." I taunted, ticking now.

Adi rolled her eyes at me and said one last thing to Finn before they both fell back into their seats, looking moderately calm and collected.

I raised a brow.

"So! Do you, or do you not, in fact fancy the pants off of the person you've been texting all day, also known as the notorious Matthew Healy, singer-slash-twat-slash-extraordinaire?"

"I'm quite sure that there was two questions in there somewhere." I argued pointlessly. 

"Was there?" Adi hummed innocently, before then turning towards Finn. "I only heard one, how about you?"

"Definitely one." The man affirmed with a sharp nod.

I scowled. With them, it always ended up being two against one.

"I don't fancy the pants off of anyone." I replied as casually as I could, throwing an arm over the back of the sofa.

"Liar!" Ads laughed jubilantly, jabbing a finger my way. "You hate texting! And for the past few days you've done nothing but constantly message him back and forth!"

She wasn't wrong. But still, that disclosed nothing.

"I enjoy finally being able to talk to someone of a similar intellect." I snarked back, going for nonchalant whilst shrugging with a smile.

Adi knew better, shaking her head at me. "You're a filthy fibber! You and I both know, you only want to get into his trousers. The papers will have a fucking field day!"

I snorted with a roll of my eyes. "We're mates, Ads. I can just have male friends without the underlying matter of me wanting to shag them senseless."

"Senseless you say?"

When I cut his eyes at her, Adi simply cackled, a hand coming to slap at her knee.

I huffed then tilted my head over towards an unusually quiet Finnley. "Let's get it over with then, hit me with it."

He smiled and it wasn't conniving nor mirthful. Simply a smile that made my entire being still. It was the same smile he'd given me when I'd told him about the car crash I'd been in as a kid and then when I'd broken down on his doorstep over the fact that I was about to become a mum. I had no fucking idea as to why he was giving it to me now. 

"Why didn't you mention it sooner?"

I hadn't quite expected him to ask that. 

I swallowed before shrugging mulishly, letting my focus stray towards the fraying hem of my favourite jumper, picking at its loose threads. 

"There wasn't any need. I- we're just friends. He's this big off singer and I'm just me. I figured it would fizzle out sooner or later."

Finn pressed his lips together and moved forward so that he was now perched on the edge of his seat. "Babe, even if that was the case, we'd still want to know. I've never seen you smile- or laugh, for that matter- so much as I have during these last few days. And so fucking what, you're just you? You're incredible! This Healy lad is lucky to have your attention. Fuck him if he doesn’t realise it."

"Finn’s right- as always." Ads added, smiling over at me and making me feel all small. "I don't care if he's toured the world or had sodding dinner with the Queen! He's got nothing on you, babe. Just friends, or not."

"Ta." I chuckled softly, a puddle of warmth flooding my chest, not all that used to this touchy feely shit even after having been friends with these two for nearing half a decade. "What would I do without the pair of you, hey?"

"Fuck knows." Finn snorted, his serious expression having morphed into something a little more amiable now that the seriousness had alleviated slightly. "I can only imagine the havoc you'd wreak if left to your own devices."

"Piss off!"

And that was the moment Teddy chose to come stumbling back into the room. His eyes lit up and he didn't even hesitate to repeat the ill-timed phrase, causing both Finn and Adi to fall into a fit of hysterics whilst I rushed over to hush him. Noting that my expression must have been priceless.

--

Putting Teddy to bed was somewhat of an excessive task. The toddler had been struck with an endless stream of energy that had lasted right up until the very moment he finally crashed.

It was tough going but I eventually managed to slump down onto the settee at a quarter to nine and sighed at the relief of allowing my body to relax. I knew I'd have to get up in a minute to start on my own dinner- something which happened most nights when we’d spent the entire day running about- but I was so close to just calling it quits and putting myself to bed, empty stomach be damned.

I inhaled sharply at the loud sound my phone made then, informing me that I had a new notification, not even having realised that I’d let my eyes slip close for a second. My lids fluttered and I rubbed at my tired face to tug my phone out from where it was squished between the cushion and my backside so that I could unlock it.

I'd only turned it off its habitual silence feature when I'd parted ways with Adi at the park earlier, having wanted to know that she'd gotten home safely. But I must’ve forgotten to snap it back, seeing as Twitter had decided to disturb my impromptu snooze. 

Really, I sighed to myself. I only ever received notifications from the people I followed nowadays, ever since the show's following had upped in numbers. It had just been too much of an inconvenience.

Adi @/AdelineWells_ 17s ago Laughable.

In a state of confusion, I frowned down at Adi's newest tweet. She was known for her amusingly snide comments on the app, but this felt a little different. Then I caught sight of the few more tweets that followed from a haze of varied users below.

Me&G @/user1 41s Lmao he looks so done

Notliving @/user2 37s They're back??!

Chocolate @/user3 29s AH I've been waiting for this!!

Robbingross @/user4 23s Wait, is Adi's tweet related?

Mayosucks @/user5 8s I'm TIRED of this shit someone tell me when it's over pls

Honestly, I debated on just messaging Adi then and there to ask what was happening, but instead happened to scroll down a little further, wondering what on earth everyone else was going on about.

The Sun @/Thesun 5m Matty Healy, 1975 frontman, spotted out in London with ex-girlfriend. The singer and model were pictured venturing into Piccadilly Circus together early this afternoon to stop for something to eat! We've missed seeing this favoured twosome! So can we now expect to see more of them?

Oh.

I read the tweet once, twice, before clicking on the affiliated link.

The webpage was excruciatingly slow to load but I soon found myself staring at Matty’s now familiar figure. There were three pictures stationed just below the oversized headline and it created a fragmented frame of Matty himself entering a high-profile restaurant with an unfamiliar woman on his arm.

I dragged my teeth over the curve of my bottom lip as I continued to read through the rest of the article. It didn't give up any more information than the tweet already had but still, I found myself analysing the pictures closely. 

When I did catch myself though, I immediately turned the phone completely off and let it slip into my lap.

I felt dizzy and so squeezed my eyes tightly shut, dragging a hand across the expanse of my face before I let my head loll back. 

I hadn't quite expected that. Nor to have reacted in the way I had. A strange feeling had since pooled just under my ribs, hollowing and encompassing me all at once. My mind was unable to focus on anything but the article, Matty’s stance, his face. The girl.

I worked my jaw, licking at my now swollen lip, and then let my hand rub at my tired eyes. 

The sudden newfound attention had been nice, I’d liked it- that much had been fucking obvious. But who wouldn’t in my position? I was single. A single fucking mother. And Matty had practically fawned over me, simpered for my attention day and night via our texts, acted like a stray puppy who constantly yipped at my feet. And I had let myself get wrapped up in it all.

Because well, Matty had felt somewhat like a pipedream. I hadn't expected to grow... attached. Was I even attached?

Typically, I didn’t choose to linger too long on the people who weren't important. On people I knew could only ever be temporary. I had Teddy, Finn, Adi, and my mum. I was happy keeping everyone else at arm's length. People had to earn a way into my life. Into Teddy’s life.

And now? Now I’d gone and fucked all of that up. Forgotten it. Over a man with haunted eyes and a seemingly tragic backstory.

It was a major misstep.

There had been others before. Because of course there had been. Before London, before Uni, before Teddy. It had all been too much of a struggle though. A confusing time. But then my baby had come along, and apart from the odd stranger in a backroom or a random flat, I hadn't wanted to introduce anyone new into my son's life. Not that that was what this was. I would never expose Teddy to the life Matty so obviously led. 

Fuck, it wasn't anything even like that! I'd just taken a fancy. Gotten too caught up in the swarm of attention I'd been so obviously starved from. Matty was a friend, a mate, someone who would probably end up leaving once things got too busy or too much. He was just temporary.

I forced myself to shake my head, desperate to clear my many thoughts and their many webs of misconceptions. Then I picked myself back up and dragged my feet into the kitchen.

Almost on autopilot, I pushed the window sat over the sink onto the latch and popped the leftovers I'd stowed away yesterday into the microwave to be reheated, then leant against the counter whilst it hummed.

Deep down, I knew I shouldn't but I couldn't really help the way my fingers trailed their way over towards the stash of cigarettes I kept hidden behind the bread bin. Out of sight, out of mind and all that. Not that it helped much on nights like these. It seemed as though the stress of the day had affected me more than I'd first thought. 

So with the melodic buzz of the microwave to break up the quiet that always settled once Teddy had fallen fast asleep, I lit a much needed fag and took a long drag. Watching as the smoke I exhaled pillowed out of the small gap in the window and into the night, grey melting into a murky black. Desperate not to think about the swell in my chest- it was just down to the smoke. That was all.

[sugarandspiceandeverythingelse]

Ryu Si-Oh/Kang Nam-Soon one-shot

Background: I'm working on a sort-of alternate universe series for Strong Girl Nam-Soon; where the main couple is Ryu Si-Oh and Kang Nam-Soon. For some reason, it's harder for me to start at the beginning and write chronologically so until I figure out how I want things to begin in this AU, I'll just post the cute/fluffy one-shots that pop into my head.

Prompt: Ryu Si-Oh takes Kang Nam-Soon on a date… but she doesn’t realize it’s a date of course.

Nam-Soon uneasily glanced around the dimly lit restaurant, fingering the lining of her well-worn skirt. The restaurant was spacious enough to seat several tables with room to spare, but the shadows, spacing, and building architecture still made it feel cozy somehow. Several windows were slightly opened to allow a gentle breeze that was cool but not chilly, and soft jazz music enveloped their table from all sides. She wasn’t dressed poorly, but certainly not fancy enough for a place like this. She’d tried to protest when the company car had pulled up to the entrance, already clocking how high class it was but Si-Oh insisted that what she wore was perfectly acceptable.

All this for a work dinner, she thought with exasperation. Si-Oh must really want that steak he mentioned on the way here. When she looked at the menu, she was simply overwhelmed by the options listed in gleaming gold font - and the prices.

She must have made a face because Si-Oh asked “Is something wrong?” The man had a way of pinning down exactly what she was feeling, and he seemed just a bit tense at her silence since they sat down.

She shook her head immediately in response, but also rolled her lips in a pensive expression. She decided to go with a half-truth. “There are so many options… I’m just not sure what I would like.”

So-Oh’s semi-concern melted away at that. “Ah, would you like me to make some recommendations?”

“Yes, if you wouldn’t mind.” She sighed in relief, handing the menu to him gratefully.

He scanned it briefly before asking a few exploratory questions - Did she like pasta? What was her favorite meat? Did she prefer soup or salad? Umami or spicy flavor profiles? Once she had answered all food-related inquiries, he made a few suggestions for an appetizer, entree, sides, and desserts, to which she readily agreed.

Once the waiter - who had seemingly materialized out of nowhere - had taken their order and left them to have some privacy, Si-Oh leaned in and fixed his unwavering gaze on her.

She found it slightly more difficult to swallow.

“Tell me about yourself. How are you…” he paused heavily. “… the way that you are?”

Nam-Soon heaved a sigh and leaned her elbow on the table, resting her chin on the open palm of her hand.

“I wish I had an interesting story to tell you, truly. Maybe something with radioactive spiders or laboratory experiments-“ Si-Oh’s shoulders twitched at that; Nam-Soon didn’t notice. ”-but I’m just me. I’ve always been like this, at least as far back as I can remember. Which is around 6 years old. That’s when my parents found me.”

“Found you?” Si-Oh asking curiously.

“Mm.” She nodded. Nam-soon stared at him for a bit longer and Si-Oh waited, obviously expecting her to continue. She still didn’t really know how to talk about this with people she didn’t know well just yet. But she found it easier to just rip the band-aid off and put it out there. “I was found wandering in the Mongolian plains when I was 6 years old, by my mom and dad. They didn’t know who I was or where I came from, and they didn’t speak Korean so it was … a while before we were able to really communicate.”

Si-Oh was listening intently, thoughtfully absorbing everything she said. It struck him viscerally how frightening that must have been and how truly awful it could have ended for her. After all, he knew better than most what kind of people could benefit from coming across an unchaperoned child.

“Your … mom and dad”, he said haltingly, wanting to mirror the language Nam-Soon used to talk about the parents she so obviously adored. “Did they go to the police? Or any state officials?”

“Oh yes,” Nam-Soon rushed to explain on her parents' behalf. “It was more than a day's ride between where they found me and anyone who may have access to information on missing children but my dad made the trip as soon as I was settled. He stayed in town for three days talking to the police and anyone else he could get a hold of, but there was nothing. There was no report, nobody looking for their missing daughter, no one new in the area, nothing. On the fourth day, he gave the police pictures of me and his contact information and came home. They didn’t hear from anyone for weeks, and after making several calls and sending messages that went unanswered for months, they eventually stopped trying. And I can’t blame them for that, really.” She smiled warmly, cheeks flushing a pretty pink, and Si-Oh felt a frisson of electricity streak up his spine at the tender look that crossed her face. “Perhaps I would feel differently if they treated me poorly or if I felt like I was missing out, but I didn’t - I was happy. They treated me as their own and after a while, well, honestly I was theirs. And they were mine.”

Nam-Soon pictured her mom and dad's faces, warmed by the sun, wrinkled with age and laughter. “When I got old enough to get curious about it, they asked me if I wanted them to go looking again. But I said no.” Si-Oh was surprised at that and said as much.

Nam-Soon shrugged her shoulders in response. “I won’t lie and say I didn’t think about it at all, but I was content with the way my life was. I had loving parents, a close community, and good friends. I was afraid that if I did find something, then it would change everything; I would be completely uprooted from my home. And if I found nothing, I might be terribly disappointed that no one had been looking for me, that I hadn’t been missed for nearly an entire decade. So I chose not to. And I haven’t regretted it since.” Nam-Soon declared brightly, nodding in satisfaction with her own logic. "After all, you can't change what's happened in the past. You can only move forward, with purpose."

Si-Oh should have been frustrated at this information; should have been annoyed that the secret to her strength couldn’t be sniffed out easily, but instead, he found himself wanting to know more about her, about her life and her thoughts.

“How was it, then, growing up in Mongolia?” Nam-Soon glowed with pride as she began to talk of her hometown and the people there. And Si-Oh, who had intended to use this dinner as an opportunity to gain more insight into her abilities … was utterly captivated by stories of her childhood.

He barely noticed when the server arrived at their table with their food.

Once their server had once again departed, Nam-Soon took the opportunity to give as good as she got.

“I feel like I’ve been talking about myself the whole time, why don’t you tell me about yourself?”

Si-Oh picked up his silverware and began to cut into his steak as he tried to think of an answer that would both satisfy her curiosity and not be an outright lie.

“There’s not much to know about me-“, he began. Nam-Soon’s eyebrows jumped up in incredulity. “I had a normal childhood. I knew from the time I was young that I would go into business, and so every decision I made was to serve that purpose.” He took a bite of bloody steak before glancing at Nam-Soon and paused as he saw her facial expression.

She was staring at him with a tiny wrinkle forming between her brows. Her hands were still at either side of her plate, utensils at the ready.

“That’s … all?” Her voice was soft and low. He enjoyed the sound of it.

He gave a small chuckle before asking, “What else is there?” An emotion he couldn’t label streaked across her face, and she looked down quickly to work at cutting her fish fillet. She took a bite and seemed to be mulling something over as she chewed. When she had finished she looked into his eyes and asked, “Do you do anything outside of work? Have any hobbies?”

He didn't have to think to answer this one. "I work out a lot; I attend many classes that cover several fighting styles, from boxing to Taekwondo. If I'm not working on company business, I'm probably fighting. And if I'm not fighting," his voice deepened as a subtle twist of his mouth, barely noticeable, betrayed a sneer of contempt. "I'm probably asleep ... or dead." In that moment, his expression was as cold and cutting as a bitter winter wind. Nam-Soon was completely taken aback by the barely concealed resentment that seemed to ooze off him like a miasma.

As she had done many times in her life, Nam-Soon spoke before she could think not to.

"That sounds ... really unfulfilling." She wished she could snatch the words back as soon as they tripped from her tongue, but it was too late to backtrack, so she held his gaze and waited for his response.

His reaction was ... surprising, to say the least. The laughter that catapulted from the back of his throat was loud enough to startle the people at two tables near them, as Si-Oh shook his head in confoundment. Nam-Soon bit her lip in consternation.

As his laughter quieted, he reached for his wine, taking a sip of the maroon liquid before locking his dark gaze with hers once again.

"You're honest to a fault, Kang Nam-Soon. I like that about you. I've been around too many liars for far too long." His words were light and unbothered, but she swore she could lighting crackling through the iris of his eyes.

"I don't mean to be insulting," she said sheepishly. "Sometimes I just speak before I can filter. Gets me into trouble sometimes."

Si-Oh shook his head, waving off her unspoken apology. "I'd rather someone be honest and insulting, than dishonest and flattering. Fake compliments, fake smiles, empty promises ... they can be found everywhere in this industry. It's how you do business and learn the trade, climbing off the backs of others that put you there. Eventually, you get so far removed from the people you struggled with at the bottom that you forget the mask you created is for your own protection, as much as theirs. Anyone can tell an easy lie with a smile. It takes real integrity," he lifted his wine glass towards Nam-Soon, tipping it in her direction as some would a toast, "to tell an uncomfortable truth with a straight face."

Nam-Soon felt oddly warmed by his praise and ducked her head in shyness, tucking her hair behind her ear. Another thought occurred to her and she glanced up at Si-Oh, not surprised to find his eyes still trained on her with laser-pointed focus. She was beginning to recognize how the weight of his gaze felt when he was watching her, without seeing him do so. He made her feel examined, and pinned into place, like a butterfly on display in a glass case.

She leaned in closer, emulating the same posture he presented when he wished to convey sincerity.

"When you speak ... it sounds as if you have a feeling of disdain towards the work that you do. So, why do it?"

His head cocked to the side. "Do you only do things that you enjoy? That bring you happiness?"

She smiled and huffed a breath in humor, "No, of course not. I'd lead a pretty privileged life if I only did the things I thought sounded fun. But generally, I do try to avoid things that I think will make me miserable in the long run. I try to make decisions that will put me in a comfortable position. And with the way you talk ..." She trailed off, not wanting to be more blunt than she already had been.

But Si-Oh took it all in stride. He leaned his body backward into his chair, nodding his head in a contemplative manner before leveling her with a frank expression of discernment. "And you don't think that's a privileged position? To be comfortable?"

Her first instinct was to push back against that assertion, to argue that being comfortable was a natural state of being. But the words wouldn't come out, and the longer she thought on it, the more she realized he was right. Some people had no choice but to be uncomfortable, usually by circumstances beyond their own control.

Si-Oh watched the emotions play across her face like an open book. And felt stimulated in a way he hadn't experienced in years.

Eventually, she nodded in his direction, saying only "I concede your point", in response to his question.

Her surrender thrilled him, satisfaction blanketing his body like a warm shawl. So clever. So honest. She was even more mesmerizing to him now than when he had first seen her at the warehouse, leaping into action like an angel of heaven.

The ravenous beast inside him growled in hunger. Miserable bastard that he was, he wanted her. And he would find a way to have her.

[magickhajiit]

Boy Wonder No More

Chapter 1

Summary-

Tim Drake has been Robin for years. Its a secret he holds close to his chest. Unfortuanatly for him the truth has a way of revealing itself in the worst moments. And Amanda 'The Wall' Waller has decided Batman's proteges, the Boy Wonder and Nightwing, have more use under her thumb than they do out flying through the dark streets of Gotham.

---------- Also known as Tim Drake and Dick Grayson join the Suicide Squad.

Rating - T

Chalk lines jumble together as Tim slumps at his desk, Shakespeare’s words melt into white noise as he watches the clock, its arms moving with the urgency of a pensioner counting their coins at a store checkout. Either three minutes or three hours ago the clock had struck two. Giving him ninety minutes till the bell screeches in the hall and about four hundred and eighty minutes till he’s flying through the dark streets of Gotham.

When the professor’s clipped voice stops Tim buries his head into his book, his bangs blocking his view of the clock and his pencil teasing the edge of the blank page. The bite of a lead pencil into his skin keeps his eyes from drooping further as he nipples at his inside cheek.

Only a few years separate his teacher and her students, a fact that she compensates for a no-nonsense attitude and a severe bun. Mrs Miller is a newly Wed who just moved from the state of Nevada after studying for three years. Her father’s a big-time banker, with connections in New York, giving her first access to a faculty spot in Gotham State Academy. According to a mixture of private emails and transfer papers courtesy of the Bat Computer. Not that Tim is meant to look, but some stalker-like habits are harder to drop than others.

‘’Timothy Drake.’’ With her non-vigilante background in mind, Tim mentally kicks himself when he starts at the sound of his name. She’s managed to sneak behind him, so close he can see how her chalk-stained fingers have smudged a hint of green onto her dark skin. Hopefully, she rubs it off before her four PM meeting.

‘’Uh- Yes.’’ Subconsciously, Tim splays a hand over his empty page.

Her green eyes don’t flick downward, focusing over his shoulder, ‘’As I just stated these gentlemen are here to see you.’’

Unease running through him Tim follows her gaze, landing on the men in the door. Both are wearing pressed black slacks and ties, their eyes shielded by black glasses. Hints of grey have started to invade the hair of the first man. The second stands inches behind him, looking like he wanted to barge into the room first but was foiled. His form is almost satirical in its stature, the empty doorway space left by the first agent has been consumed by the second. ‘’Right. Sorry.’’ When Tim stuffs his work into his backpack no one speaks up to correct his assumption. The gaze of his classmates burns a hole through his blazer as he walks to meet them, the door closing in his wake.

Despite a warning bell blaring in his mind, he plasters on his best Timothy Drake smile when he asks, ‘’Can I ask what this is about.’’

‘’We need you to come with us, son.’’ The older man speaks first his speckled military-style moustache wiggles as he talks.

‘’Not until I know what this is about.’’ Deep in his pockets, his hand tightened to fists, nails embedding. He pushes a joke past his lips, its intent to disarm. ‘’My parents did warn me about stranger danger after all’’

Moustache man cracks a grin and for a split second, Tim thinks he’s won. ‘’If you tweet any louder than that you might cause a scene. And that’s not going to end well for any of us. Capesh.’’ When the second guy opens his mouth Tim can hear a slight whistle, and when he sneers he flashes empty gums and sparse teeth.

Tweeting. Maybe it's a coincidence. Maybe not. ‘’Sorry. I didn’t mean any disrespect I’m just curious.’’ Placatingly Tim raises his hands, taking note of the flintch that crosses the men’s faces.

‘’Curiosity killed the cat you know.’’ The hand that lands on his shoulder propels his body down the corridor, his fingers embedding marks that will likely blossom into bruises before the next sunrise. Just as Tim’s thanking God third period hadn’t yet finished the boy shuffles around the corner, his gaze locked onto the device clutched in his hand. With a teenage sixth sense, he knows to glance up moments before collision. His eyes widen like saucers as he takes sight of Tim.

‘’So it's true.’’ Tim thinks he might take double math with the boy but he’s not too sure. Before he can question and feed that voice in his head warning him the phone plucked out of the boy’s hand, earphones trailing behind, and crushed beneath the heel of a recently polished office shoe. ‘’ Hey. You can’t do that. I have rights.’’

The meaty hand that propels him forward is quickly replaced by a grip on the back of his neck, the pressure almost reassuring. ‘’Stay Calm and don’t struggle. You don’t need to make this any worse.’’ The older man guides him faster down the hall, but not before he sees the giant agent lift the boy a few inches from the floor, held aloft by the lapels of his own blazer. Robin knows at least a few dozen ways to untangle himself from the hold, another dozen ways to drop the agents and be out of the building before their bodies hit the ground. Timothy Drake however knows none.

Bright rays of sun leave him blinded for a moment when they burst through the front doors and only by habit does he manage the following steps without tumbling. Already he knew not to expect to be led to the principal’s office. Whatever this was, was bigger than a detention. Still, the black special ops van that’s rolled up to the school’s front doors is a surprise, as are the armed men surrounding it. ‘’Wait there’s been a mistake.’’ One hand dives into his pocket, digging around he presses the help button moments before his hands are wrenched behind his back.

‘’Sure there has.’’ Gum Guy was back, now forcing him forward into the awaiting open doors of the van. Two armed guards are already occupying the space within, not reacting even as Tim is forced to his knees between them. The chains that are resting on the van’s floor are quickly wrapped around his wrists, keeping his hands at the same level as his knees. As he’s trussed up he puts up a token protest at best, still hoping there is still a secret identity he's protecting. Though he takes satisfaction at hearing a grunt as he stabs backward with a sharp elbow, hitting a softness that promises a stomach hit. ‘’I hope I didn’t ruffle your feathers too much today, birdy boy.’’ The van’s doors slam closed as Tim’s throat runs dry.

[swallowedbyfandom]

When she gets in Varley hurriedly escorts her into the drawing room. That must mean Lord Debling has come sniffing around. She is about to ruin her mama's week by turning that man's title and fortune down. There is something to be said about embracing spite.

Lord Debling rises to his feet as soon as she walks in. It seems she is not the only one dressed to impress today. Were she in a more forgiving mood she would be quite moved by the effort he has made with his appearance. She softens her body language into something a little more fragile. She widens her eyes into something a glassy and a touch disappointed. Let this hero see how he has let her down so. Let him grieve his foolish doubts. She lets him briefly see her betrayal before she tilts her chin up and changes her face into something much more resolved.

She knows he has noticed the byplay across her face by the tightness at the corners of his eyes and the downturns of his brow. He bows much lower than is necessary to her.

"Miss Featherington, may I say you look exquisite today. I know you were not expecting me given the way we left off last night. I have hoped you would indulge me today so that we may clear the air so to speak."

"Of course My Lord, I think that would be beneficial for us both."

"I want to apologize for the way I conducted myself last night. You are a true Lady and you have always conducted yourself with the upmost propriety. You did not deserve my accusations. Please forgive me."

"Lord Debling, you are not a simpleton so I imagine you have noticed that my home life is not healthy. Bridgerton house was my sanctuary growing up. It was where I went to escape the negligence and the harsh words of my family."

Her mother's harsh tone and glare cut her off, "My Lord, please excuse her tales. She often forgets her place, reminding your child of their deficiencies is a parent's duty. How else will they learn if you allow them to have their own thoughts?"

Really her mother has just made her point beautifully. She can see Lord Debling's fists are both clenched and he is grinding his jaw hard enough to crack a tooth. She allows a few tears to spill out at the harsh words to complete the effect. It is the tears that ultimately cause him to lash out at her mama.

"Lady Featherington I would advise that you not interrupt us again. I am here to speak to Miss Penelope, only."

Softly he takes hold of her hand.

"Please continue, I would like a clearer understanding of you."

She takes a deep breath and proceeds.

"I was practically raised in Bridgerton house from the ages of 8 until 16. I have taken most of my lessons with the Bridgerton children as my sisters were often cruel if they felt I was being a know it all. While high society likes to focus on my friendships with Eloise and Colin, in truth I was always close with all the Bridgerton ladies."

"That is why I enjoy the view so much. It is to date, the only home I have ever found acceptance in. Where I can partake in a meal without reprimand for every morsel that passes my lips. It is Lady Violet I flee to when I am in need of maternal comfort. I have always been a timid wallflower, after all my mama made me debut at 16 and I was nowhere near ready for marriage that young. It has been three years since and I am more settled into myself. I decided I was ready to seek marriage."

She tightens her grip on his hand as if seeking comfort. She can feel the fine tremble in his strong grasp. It is almost enough to make her reconsider.

"I asked Mr. Bridgerton to help me on the marriage mart this year because my family has no patriarch to vet suitors for me. Mr. Bridgerton would be able to find out which gentlemen had illegitimate children or kept mistresses. All things that a gently bred Lady would not know. I trusted Mr. Bridgerton to weed out the gentleman prone to vice or violence as he is my oldest friend in the world. I do not trust my mama."

"My mama would sell me to the first man of title or wealth that made her an offer without a single care. Did she ask you any questions that did not pertain to your estate or wealth? Or did she spend the entire time hinting at favors that could be done for the benefit of my sisters and herself?"

She watches that realization play out across his handsome face. He appears to be in physical pain to have missed such a glaring sign of Portia's lack of regard for her.

"I had thought you different from the gentleman of the Ton. I had thought you a man of great convictions. An individual much like myself who dares to be different regardless of the mockery. I had thought we would have a marriage of partnership and trust."

"Last night you assumed the worst of me without any hesitation. If you doubt me now so easily, how am I to trust you will not doubt me after you have been traveling for a prolonged bout of time? I will not live my life waiting for some wild accusation to turn you against me. "

"More than anything I want stability for my self and my future children. I wish to marry a man of keen wit and substance. I had thought you with your intellect, age, and kindness, to be such a man."

"I see now unfortunately you are not. You My Lord, are like all the rest. Quick to make assumptions and assign blame. You had already made up your mind of my guilt before ever speaking to me. I shan't allow myself to marry a man who already seeks to betray me."

"I may want someone to save me from this cage I reside in but I will not trade one harsh home for another. I would rather be a spinster, My Lord."

She withdraws her hand from his, and gives him a sad look from under her lashes as she curtesy. As she walks away from him she hears him call out to her in a voice that sounds like gravel.

"Miss Penelope, I am ashamed to have added to your sorrow." She hears him walk up behind her, so she turns to face him. He place a ring into the center of her palm and closes her fingers delicately around it. Then he places a sweet kiss on her wrist. She feels his beard tickle across her skin. She allows herself a single shudder of intrigue.

"I know words are insufficient for the injury I have caused you. Please keep the ring, I picked it for you and it should grace no hand other than yours. You are truly incomparable. Farewell, my dove."

She leaves him standing in her drawing room. She wants to wash her face and take a nap. While she enjoys reading people to filth doing so in such a manipulative manner is exhausting.

She has barely finished removing her gown and washing her face when her mother strolls into her room. Her mama looks fit to burst with disbelief and rage.

"Why? Penelope that man brought a ring with him you could have still married him. His coin is the answer to all our problems."

"Why would you tell him all that? You ungrateful child! Everything I have done has been for our benefit."

There are a million reasons she can give but there are only two that Portia would understand, only two Portia will respect.

"Mother, Lord Debling's great passion in life is rescuing all the poor endangered creatures of the world. He believes himself superior to all other men an enlightened defender of the weak. He wants to spend the next 3 years rescuing birds! I just made myself the most injured bird he has ever encountered. It is a tragedy, is it not? That his actions have wounded me further? His guilt will eat him alive!"

"Are you not tired of suffering for the actions of weak men? Men never pay for their actions. But a single hint of wrong doing can see a lady ruined and thrown out into the streets."

"Lord Debling will end tonight drowning his sorrows at some high end Gentlemen's club. He will lament over his loss of me. He will sing my praises and my reputation will remain intact. My status has just gone from an unwanted wallflower to a wild blossom that cannot be plucked by just anybody."

"Miss Cowper sought to steal my future, mama. She may still entrap him yet, but she will have to work harder for it. Even if they marry he will long for the life he could have had with me. He will pine away for the protection he could have given me. He will wonder about the unique children we could have had together."

"If Cressida does get a ring from him she will have to accept it knowing it was the second one he issued this season. Do you understand now?"

Shockingly her mother looks more impressed than she has ever seen her. Portia gently runs her fingers through her hair and drops a kiss on the crown of her head. She nods once.

"Yes, I understand now."

Penelope feels a little like she is trapped in a fever dream. Perhaps her mama is ill? She will keep an eye out later. Right now she needs a nap.

[inkovert]

Snippet

"You know," Spencer started, "I think it's safe to say that I've never been as confused by another human being as I am about you." 

I blinked. Cocked my head in his general direction. Furrowed my brows. Surely, I had misheard. 

"Thank you for reminding me why I rarely come and talk to you. It's because of helpful comments like that." With a shake of my head, I prepared to rise. 

"That wasn't meant as an insult." He sat with one leg outstretched, an arm balanced on a bent knee, his gaze trained on nothing in particular. "I just don't understand how someone can do everything in their power to make everyone around them happy, even at their own expense, and still blame themselves for not doing enough." 

Eyes widening, I focused them back on him. 

"You stand up for yourself, then panic for saying too much. You stay silent, then berate yourself for not speaking up. With odds like that, how could you ever be satisfied? Maybe that's the point. It's like...you're hell bent on making yourself miserable."

"I—" I cut myself off, cursing. I couldn't fight back against anything he said. It was the brutal truth. 

"And for what? 'Cause you think you deserve it? 'Cause if you can just do everything right, tie up every single loose end, it will make up for that one thing you did wrong." I stiffened. "The one thing you can't go back and make right."

"Stop!" I lunged across the small space between us, reaching for him to shut him up. But I smacked into his knee instead. Chest bruised in more ways than one, I pulled back and knelt before him, my face buried in my gloved hands, my braids falling like curtains around me. "Just...stop." 

The wind whistled in my ears, rustling leaves in the distance. 

"It wasn't your fault." My skin prickled, but I couldn't bring myself to look at him yet. "We're the kids. They're the parents. They're the ones who are supposed to know better. She should've never put you in that position. By doing that, she took something from you that you'll never be able to get back." I bit my bottom lip to keep it from trembling. I refused to cry. But his voice was so close, and it was so soft, softer than I'd ever heard it. And it almost sounded like being forgiven. 

"I won't pretend to know what your dad was like. But from the way you talk about him, I can't imagine he would want you carrying around guilt that isn't yours for the rest of your life. Nor would he want to see you take it out on yourself." 

My breath caught. Wide-eyed, I looked up at him in disbelief. Then, I broke. Tears streaming down my face, sobbing into the sleeve of my coat. 

I sniffled, struggling to regain control of myself. "God, can you just go back to being an asshole? It made me cry a lot less." 

Spencer chuckled. 

I furiously wiped away any remaining tears, the rough fabric of my gloves stinging my face. "I just don't want to end up like her, you know?"

"You won't."

"I'm not so sure about that. I'm basically following her blueprint. Lying, keeping secrets —"

"You won't," he said again, firm but gentle. "You care way too much for something like that to happen."

Skin erupting in goosebumps at the compliment, I stared at him. His gaze was fixed elsewhere for a moment, until he finally glanced over to meet mine. My breath hitched, a weird feeling settling into my stomach.