#thank u for all who indulges me !
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dandelion-roots · 7 months ago
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[Image description: a digital drawing of sklonda and pok gukgak from fantasy high, two goblins with shoulder length straight hair and short curly hair, respectively. they're touching foreheads and embracing, both of sklonda's hands in pok's hair, while one of pok's hands is moving sklonda's bangs off her foreheads and the other is clutching at her waist. we only see sklonda's face and the look of silent grief on it. in the background on pok's half is a stylized dragon's mouth with teeth digging into his shoulder, and on sklonda's side are sheets of paper. over the background on the left is text that reads, it's okay, and then on the right side in brackets it says, (it'll be ok). End image description]
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vengeancemoths · 3 months ago
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ok. yay! let's talk about jason todd autopsy scars.
WARNING: pretty thorough description of an autopsy ahead. if you don't like cut up bodies this one isn't for you.
prefacing this by saying i am not in any way a field expert in any of this, just a guy with really morbid autism and a pretty objectively concerning collection of nonfiction on the subject. i may be wrong about things! i did not crack open the books for my stupid little tumblr post (this time). people with actual experience feel free to correct me.
if jason had had a thorough autopsy performed on him, he would not come back to life* and also probably bruce wayne would go to jail.
*or at least come back with scars from it. more on that later!
if an autopsy was performed it would have to be by someone who knew about batman because robin's scars are pretty difficult to explain. it would be pretty easy to bypass an official autopsy, jason was blown up, his cause of death is not exactly a mystery.
bruce wayne might be the kind of guy who's so obsessive he needs to know exactly which event actually killed jason (if the crowbar killed him, batman couldn't have gotten there in time. if the smoke killed him....). but maybe he also wouldn't want to know for the same reason.
the most important thing is that we know jason had massive head trauma. if you were trying to figure out which of the many terrible things that happened to him was the one that killed him, you'd want to take a look at the brain.
and guys, i don't know if you know this, but the brain only holds its shape because it's inside your skull. the human brain is the consistency of silken tofu. once it's out of your head, it's not going back in.
this is inconvenient for coroners, so they'll probably spend several days soaking jason's brain in a chemical concoction designed to make it firm up. once they do that, it's time to dissect it.
but the fun doesn't end there! once they're done, if they don't just dispose of the brain separately, they're still not going to go through the trouble if wrangling it back into jason's cranium (now open on top, like an egg cup). it goes in the organ bag!
did i forget to mention the organ bag? look, they're not going to put all of his wet organs back into his chest cavity. he's already rapidly decaying. if bruce wayne gets his son back and he's leaking there'll be hell to pay.
so all the organs, which at this point have also been cut into little pieces to study, get jumbled together in a plastic bag. that they do stick back into the kind of gaping hole that the organs vacated. then they stick the ribs back in place (they were sawed off, at the beginning, to gain entry to the organs).
and honestly? without the brain in the mix i can almost believe it. i guess if jason had a really shitty autopsy courtesy of gotham's overcrowded underfunded mortuary? i mean more people who write jason resurrection fic should have to think about the organ bag, and what happens to it. would it just sort of glorp out of him while his organs wiggle themselves back into place? one day i will write my funeral industry accurate jason todd resurrection fic and it will make everyone sad and uncomfortable.
but i guess my thesis statement is that i think it would be really hard to come back to life if your brain was in 7-14 pieces inside a plastic bag where your stomach used to be.
the most likely way for the resurrection to work, in that case, would be to restore his body to its state directly before death, which does unfortunately predate his autopsy.
so what this post is saying is that jason probably wouldn't have had an autopsy, but even if he did, he wouldn't have the scars to show for it.
now, the idea that they're vivisection scars and ra's al ghul was poking around in there? i like that a lot
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brother-genitivi · 2 years ago
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woe!! Destan and Sebastian be upon ye!!
beautifully illustrated by my wonderful friend @forystr (WHO ALSO HAS COMMS OPEN RIGHT NOW YOU SHOULD GET ONE WINK WONK)
his comm links are here and here :)
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red-dyed-sarumane · 14 days ago
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what are your rankings for hiiragi magnetite songs? ^^
sorry i said this would take several hours and then spent several days on it i care too much.
im only listing songs they've posted themself bc i'll be honest they do a lot of comm songs & i've lost track of all of them & this would get just way too extensive if i did so
kyuuyaku hankagai - the definitive magu song to me its really got everything. its heavy its dramatic the weight of the scenario gets across in every part of the composition. the part at like 3:24 where the bell tolls & u can really feel that sense of time running out. how long and high the notes are just being the perfect representation of screaming out of stress and fear and panic. how the rute furute woa & nami no ne no motifs mix into it so so well. i could go on about this song forever not even exaggerating ive never loved a song more.
oumen mokushiroku - the atmosphere of this one is so pretty yet so intense. the slower very pretty sounds like ur in a cathedral vibe into undeniably more intense edm & the way the two are mixed flawlessly together i love it i love it i love it. the way it reflects her state of mind, the shock of realizing her times almost up at the beginning shown with nothing but the rain that gradually works its way into something heavier with all her pleas, the feeling of panic & desperation it gets across, everything building up until she finally lies to herself it'll be better for everyone & ending so quietly as theres nothing more to be done no way to change the outcome she has no choice but to accept its over for her. its so good both in and out of series context for real
kugutsu ashura - the thing that sells me on this is always the last lyric section theres just something so so emotional about it. and it feels like every motif in the series should be in there and yet no matter how hard i try to find it in either the vocals or just the instrumental they arent there. after the heavy whole rest of the song the part from the ugate iine sono rensa line is just so bright and decisive and has so so much in it it makes the whole song for me. also i have mad respect for making a whole song out of words that are so mildly different sounding from each other. and magu says theyre bad at words. whats all this then. amazing to me. 
kannagi - i swear this song is permanently stuck in my head the rhythm & the melody are just so easy to listen to. i'll be going about my day not listening to it & suddenly im tapping it out or singing it without thinking. the fact that not even the jpn fans were sure if it was a made of language or old time jpn. & i think the majority of it Was deciphered but theeres still some overlooked lines i dont have the time to figure out myself (old jpn into modern jpn into eng). but even then u can feel a sort of hopeful regret in all of it. that feeling of "i meant well but it still ended up like this". i adore this song i really do. 
yamete kudasai - I LOVE THIS SONG this character could be my best friend fr. following orders bc its what u think u should do only to realize too late ur not urself anymore and get mad & complain about it. i love her we're the same. also its just a really fun song rhythm wise. bu bu bubun bu bu bubun... i also adore when the train crossing bells are used in songs its like my favorite thing ever feels like home to me
kafu-eine - KAFEINE!!!!!!!! for a while before this i was thinking someone should make a kafu themed coffee song like kafu-ccino or something imagine how i felt when my favorite producer did it better than i could ever think of. also i have a spiritual attachment to this song bc yelling kafu with the whole rest of the club & magu themself was by far the best moment of my life
aru sekai shoushitsu - i have very strong opinions on this song everyone who says its too long are missing the point. yes its 11 minutes long. if u would pay attention for 2 minutes u would realize how intentional that is & that its SHOWING the very themes the song is describing. also even being 11 minutes long this is the easy song to listen to ive ever heard the rhythm of everything is just perfect it really doesnt feel like 11 minutes at worst it feels like a 4 minute song u dont remember putting on repeat. this song gives me a headache when i think too hard about bc its SO direct and to the point it leaves out context (thats what the other songs are for so its fine) that makes it impossible to understand on its own but u get the context from other songs & ur like oh damn it really meant that directly they really just told us that. flawless first song that continues to hold up with the rest of the series songs 10/10
marshall maximizer - can i be honest with u the piano chords in this song remind me of pokemon dppt's route 216 music (which i love). anyway i love this song i dont think its overrated at all i think its perfectly rated although i do think a lot of people dont really think about what its saying so much as its fun to listen to. we love sunk cost fallacy the song!!!!! tabete! sugu nete! ushi ni naru! okite! mata nete! hito de nashi?!!! u will always be famous to me. it has a sort of unaffected vibe compared to other series songs despite her very clearly being aware of whats happening & that interests me. also shout out to the mini novel in the middle just flat out telling us what happens when someones not a "person" anymore. although this character's indifference to it means it didnt really hit me until laboratory. 
red rose - idk compass at all but THIS SONG GOES SO HARDDD.  AKAKI HOLY RAAAAAAAAAIN!!!!!!! theres a feeling of strength in this song its like impossible for me to feel bad while listening to it. its just really good really solid. its also my friend who also a Huge magu fans favorite song so it get extra points. im in the process of making a rime cover of it btw if u didnt know. 
laboratory - ive never had a song tear me apart this badly before. its so heavy and direct it took me like a whole month or more to process it when i came out and even now if i start thinking about it too hard i feel a little sick to my stomach. its exactly what maximizer was describing but from the opposite perspective. she doesnt want to die. she would do anything to take a step back and have another chance. but she ignored all the warning signs & overlooked the details and now she's passed the point of no return and all she can do is watch it happen to herself. and the dubstep drops just add to the whole feeling of when ur panicking so hard everything feels like its spinning and unstable and theres nothing to hold onto. and this is also my favorite usage of rime ive ever heard shes SOOOOOO cute and smooth thank u magu for the food im begging u to use her again. 
rasshaina - its just a really fun halloween song. it think its really funny that they tried being scary & even wrote a mini novel in it about like copious amounts of blood filling a room and its STILL no where as terrifying as laboratory is. zero complaints on this song and the word play is really really fun. 
nadenna - super cute zirai song. i was so happy when this came out & i still love it. i dont have anything profound to say its just a fun song. 
antenna39 - THIS IS SUCH A FUN SONG IM SO HAPPY THEY GOT TO DO THE MAGIMIRA THEME THATS SUCH AN HONOR..... my vocaP doing such an influential song love that for them. i unfortunately missed the ticket window for magimira itself but it was super fun in the club & i like to listen to it on the train to events really gets me in a fun excited mood i love it a lot i get a little emotionally overwhelmed listening to it sometimes but like positive emotions so its fine. 
unplanned apoptosis - i have 2 opinions on this song and the first is i understand her entirely and shes so right to be Like That. the second is wow girl why are we acting like this it seems a bit over dramatic and nonsensical. shes such a brat she awful WHY are u so mean. but also shes got the whole world ending repeatedly & her closest friend(?) just died permanently possibly bc of her & she didn't even get a chance to say anything about it or to her so like yeah i get it she deserves a meltdown or too. but u just know shes also awful in general too look at how she talks come ON girl. i think about her constantly. the instrumental too just really embodies that panic and instability of a breakdown total whirlwind of a song i think its really well handled. the fact even some of the lyrics kind of switch tone from hiding/ignoring something to accidentally letting the truth through idk its a fascinating song. i get her im her #1 apologist. i would also trip her down the stairs given the first opportunity to do so. 
kanon - this song had me worried magu was going to do maximizer but different as their usual music but that didnt happen its fine like ah it was an intentional choice [saying this they tossed a large rock from behind their back] i always think im neutral on this one until i hear it and i absolutely lose my mind over it. daremo gisei ni nanka naranai sonna risou ni sugatteshimatta in particular drives me INSANE. like YEAH. YEAH that wouldve been nice wouldnt it. wouldnt it. i like how this girl also admits to lying like in a i just wanted them to listen to me way & now she regrets it deeply. its like a totally different regret from kannagi tho. very solid song. also like the little coded text in the bg implying(?stating?) the whole things their fault in the first place and now they cant fix what they started. 
saiken romanesque - i'll be honest i just like thinking about this as a ship song for the girlies. like yes both of the girlies Are this producer's ocs no this song is not actually about them even slightly. but im insane enough to make it work. one day i'll finish the coko (+kafu & rime) cover of this that i started like 2 years ago. 
shuuen touhikou - putting a series song this low feels wrong & my opinion of it HAS improved since realizing the rute furute woa motif is like. a thing. & is most of the instrumental in this song. sorry this is just the least impactful of the series songs to me. thats not saying much however i would defend this song with my life. the.  mikitte isso nigeteshimaetara has gotten me thru so much. sometimes u really do just have to say ashi wa mada & do things scared. if i put it on by choice im neutral about it if it comes on when im not expecting it i Lose My Mind i do love it a lot. 
realize - im still waiting for kohane solo vocals on this. im SOOOOOOOO happy magu got a comm song in proseka i was begging for shuuen touhikou or maximizer to get in for the longest time and then they said magu comm song for vbs and i was like YESSSS. its a really good fun song too. i want to ap master in proseka one day but my wrists have been too fucked to practice it 😔😔
perfection - i again have no familiarity with the source material here but the song is really solid. nice full sound with miku & the piano to give it a very pretty touch
tetoris - i dont know how this exploded i think kafu-eine is the better meme song BUT it is a really fun song. bouncy rhythm. te te te teto teto te te te tetoris!! very fun. theres actually a lot in it too if u care to look (i have not yet beyond what they explained themself). they said they were having a rough time & they only ended up finishing it bc of a friends tweet & it kinda shows its very much a depression song. thats a neutral statement not a complaint. 
uni - this ones cute. nice to have a rain theme magu song thats not a series song. just some cute gumiku. i started a kafu lapis cover of this and never got anywhere with it oops. it has a sort of sparkly feeling like sun bouncing off raindrops very fitting as expected of magu
retry - i actually DID read several chapters of the source material specifically bc of this song (it was not my thing) and its really neat to see magu doing time loops outside of aru sekai series . its such a similar theme but done so entirely differently & its really fun to see them handle it as such. going from series songs where the world is dying & everyone's right to exist as a person is on the line at the same time to this where its just a boy getting in situations & making it his problem to solve is like. refreshing in a way. 
fabric flower - this one as well idk the source material but the stories really clear from this song. this feels like an experimental type of song for them its so much lighter than just about everything else theyve done before or since. were it not for the magu signature piano & chord progression i would not recognize this as a magu song if i didnt already know. i actually do like how the story in it is told i think its a really good solid song but given the choice i usually listen to their other songs instead. 
im not including comm songs they havent posted themself but honorable mention to viper they wrote for kankan. AMAZING song its my fave comm song of theirs i think it'd be like 7.5 on this list i think. mugen kyoukaisou for araki also ranks high as does dimension for isekaijoucho. 
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habibisagi · 3 months ago
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“stop saying i’m your good girl.” and you’re warm in the face. close to crying because of course, he forced you to say that. something so mortifying to you and gratuitous for him.
he asks who’s a good girl like every time you cum, every time you let him do something perverse. almost like he’s getting you used to being his good girl. i think he really does get off on how meek and shy it gets you when he praises you because given the man that he is, you should know not to be swooned by him

and you ask him to stop with this mousey little voice that makes his dick throb

.he thinks you’re hesitating, thinking twice, about not being his good girl.
you never convince him to stop in the end and he fucks you stupid with the phrase “i’m sorry, i’ll be your good girl again” until he’s satisfied (stops sulking) again. XD
DIOR .
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theloveinc · 1 year ago
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c.w: fem pronouns
Just watched the new Hunger Games movie and I need to slobber on some district!Bakugou for a while! đŸ˜«đŸ˜«
Like imagine you're both there for the Reaping and a random boy's name is called and both your shoulders drop just a bit because at it's not Bakugou. However, your name is called for the female tribute and Bakugou immediately volunteers. He can't step in for you since there has to be a female tribute, so he steps in as the male tribute so he can at least protect you during the games, even if that means killing or to be killed đŸ˜«đŸ˜«
FUCKKCKCKCKKKKKKKKK and you're just bawling as he walks up to the stand, half out of sadness half out of rage; he finally, finally escaped the games (this being his last reaping), yet here he is, just offering himself up on a silver platter all because of you.
You can't say you don't love him even more for it, are even a little relieved, but... now you're both gonna die and you're not sure who to blame. Bakugo trades places with the random boy (who practically runs off stage) and goes in to comfort you, tell you it's all gonna be okay as the peacekeepers start leading you away, but instead of accepting the gesture, I can imagine you swat him off, angry because he didn't just save himself.
(It doesn't get any easier as time goes on—in waiting for your turn to say goodbye to your family, you can hear his mother berate him for being weak and softhearted, his father is practically nonverbal with tears, disowning him unless he's able to make it home. In boarding the train to the capital, your district mentors tsk at him for "choosing" a girl over a lifetime of freedom, and even the news can't seem to stop bringing up the fact he volunteered only after you were picked.
It makes Bakugo mad, furious even, and more determined to win given how they underestimate him... but it's not like that protects you along with him.)
and even though he never brings those moments up to you once they pass (and you forgive him enough to at least speak to him), there's still these question of what your strategy is going to be. Do you play up the fact that you're a couple, or do you pretend that you don't know one another (except at night, when you can finally sneak into each other's rooms without anyone noticing)? Do you team up in the games as soon as possible and do the whole thing together, or see how far you get alone???????????????
UGH, JUST.... WHY WOULD U DO THIS BAKUGO ????????!!!!!!! we know he gets you both out though
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wraithsoutlaws · 1 year ago
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you know i had a fun little vp idea i wanted to do for the cyberpunk anniversary but i haven't had the energy to even touch it recently so i'll just settle with saying that this game impacted me in ways i never thought it would when i first picked it up 3 years ago. i knew i would enjoy it, i had been looking forward to it for a long time, and despite a ~controversial~ launch, i had a fucking blast from day 1 (on ps4 no less). regardless of bugs and memes and public dunking, the story grabbed me like nothing else could at the time, and it reignited so much of my passion and motivation for art that i had lost in the clutches of mental illness and i'll always be grateful for that. it introduced me to so many wonderful people (some whom i carry very close to my heart), and maybe most personally surprising, it gave me an outlet to understand parts of myself that i had been too afraid to acknowledge for a long time, the courage to accept and embrace myself as non-binary, and allow myself to just BE without trying to convince myself i'm crazy. that's not what i expected from the get-go but it's been a really fun journey to be on ngl
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feline-evil · 1 year ago
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Blinks cutely. I finally finished my MTL OC that i've had brewing in my head for a while. Lineart was done by my beloved @subsequentibis who really helped me out while i can't draw too much or often!!! <3 Transcript of text AND a lil height ref below!!
JAX He/Him 32 5ft 7 Ex-bassist for a goth-rock band. Gay trans man. Running solely on caffeine and alcohol. Over-anxious and stressed. Needs a month long sleep and so many vitamin supplements..... Smells bad. Has a lip scar from a piercing getting torn out at a rowdy show. Height/scale ref feat a redraw of Nathan in my style teehee. (Nathan is supposed to be like 6ft 5 here, that's my headcanon height for him. And yeah, yes, i did make Jax up to ship w him bc its fuuuuuuun :3 )
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bronzebtch · 2 years ago
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caving in to my own impulsive ideas: would anybody like ( a possibly mini-para ) completely unhinged starter ?
Âč multimuses please specify, ÂČ if you'd like me to approach for plotting first, please feel free to comment the 🐑 emoji <3
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byanyan · 11 months ago
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it's been a while since i've talked about how important byan's hair is to them... how, after 10+ years of having little say in it, foster parents and caretakers always insisting it be kept shorter in boyish styles, it eventually became one of the first aspects of their appearance that they had any control over... one of the first ways they were able to express themself and their gender the way they wanted to... how excited they were the first time it was long enough that they were able to pull it back into pigtails and ponytails and how much they love playing with it and decorating it with cute little clips and scrunchies and ribbons... how they've bitten at least one hairdresser who tried taking scissors to it and how they hate having to cover it with a beanie during winter... how they consider it such a significant part of their look and style and how they take very good care of it because they do take so much pride in it... it's something i have a lot of feelings about, i really should talk about it more
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undefeatablesin · 2 years ago
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OH! If you want can you tell us about your arcane hunter??? (I love arcane builds)
Ask Sin Stuff ✚
Omg thank you for indulging me I would indeed love to talk about my arcane hunter actually 💅 I guess I'll start with the actual gameplay side of it because they were a total accident to be completely fair; at the beginning, I'd wanted to main the Blades of Mercy and focus on Skill, but found that a bit unfulfilling to play so I switched gears mid-run to invest mostly in Arcane instead with some Strength and Skill still thrown in for good measure. Rather unexpectedly for me who knows very little about builds and the like, they became an absolute powerhouse of a hunter and incredibly fun to run because of it 😂
Currently they main the Holy Moonlight Sword (with the BoM still equipped as their secondary since those have some Arc scaling anyway). They don't often need to use their Blunderbuss that much since HMS just destroys everything that breathes in its transformed state, but they have it anyway for parrying's sake! Their most often used Arcane tools are the Tiny Tonitrus, Augur of Ebrietas and A Call Beyond. As you can probably tell, we are most enthusiastic about the Tiny Tonitrus and its ability to just one shot annoying kin enemies from a distance 😂 Please enjoy some not so HQ images of my little menace ✚How they got so bloody I dont remember, just that it felt metal af to walk around like that against the snowy white scenery of Cainhurst tbqh.
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As for this hunter as a character, I kind of didn't have one in mind at first! This profile started as just a catalyst for a new playstyle initially. However, that has definitely since changed. They're still a relatively new and unpolished addition to my roster since the majority of my creative time is devoted to Ruza My Beloved, but I am pursuing an interesting??? Set of concepts for this hunter too lmao. This is probably not news to anyone who has been in the fandom longer than me, but I read recently about the blue eyed scourge beasts from UCW and was enlightened to the fact those were actually "ascendant" scourge beasts with kin-like qualities, such as being weak only to thrust damage; most likely created from members of the Choir who were steeped in the Arcane and rich with Insight by time the scourge got to them, hence they basically became a different strain of scourge beast. I also spied a reddit thread that proposed the idea of the abhorrent beast/suspicious beggar being able to freely control his transformations into his beastly self and that what primarily made this character unique was his complete acceptance of said self. A sort of Beastly Embrace, you might say? đŸ€­
So tl;dr, I am workshopping this character rn as an Arcane Beast hunter who can freely control their beast self and for that beast self to be modelled after the blue eyed kin-like scourge beasts. Perhaps a renegade member of the choir who turned against their faction? I haven't fully decided yet, but we will see đŸ˜€âœšïž Oh, and their name (for rn anyway) is Aloysha.
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p-clodius-pulcher · 2 years ago
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Every time I get someone new to read the aeneid (I am a master of manipulation) they bring something to the table I’ve never considered it’s the best feeling in the world to be sent a texted message about the aeneid!!!!!!!
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wonustars · 10 months ago
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jesus christ
crossroads
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🌙 starring. Kim Mingyu & Jeon Wonwoo x afab!Reader
🔼 preview. If one neighbour is a Doberman, then the other is a Golden Retriever. They’re like night and day, and yet, you’re drawn to both, as if some gravitational or celestial power is pulling you to them
 it also helps that they both have motorcycles. How had it been so easy to ghost Wonwoo in the past, only to find yourself at a crossroads with his roommate seven months later?
tw/cw. Threesome, unprotected sex, multiple sex scenes, big dick Mingyu, creampie, oral (f/m receiving), blow job, deep throating, hand job, Eiffel tower/spit roasting, breast worship, nipple pinching, nipple licking, panty kink, eating pussy through panties, fingering, squirting, pussy stretching, praise, dirty talk, ‘sir’, dom!Wonwoo, switch!mingyu, blindfold/sensory deprivation, voyeurism, listening to your neighbour have sex, masturbation, reader reads erotica, mutual masturbation, slight dacryphilia, blindfold/sensory deprivation, inklings of humiliation, etc
 I pet names: (hers) angel, baby. (Mingyu’s) gyu. (Wonwoo’s) sir. 
đŸ‘č rating.18+ explicit I wc. 19.8k
🍭 aus. Biker!meanie, booktok!reader, neighbours!au, etc

☀ mlist + an. This was not supposed to be this long. I don’t know how this happened. 
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Prologue 
“Who keeps messaging you?” your cousin asks, trying to act nonchalant as he sips his margarita, but you can feel his eyes on you as you stare at your phone.
“The Harley dude,” you sigh, quickly reading the text message.
“The guy who missed your first date because he was napping?” Jeonghan nearly chokes on his drink, setting it down in favor of flashing you a judgemental look.
“Yeah, the same guy who also tried to rebook our first date as a group ride night with all his friends,” you roll your own eyes at the stupidity of men. While the idea is fun, it’s not the way to get to know someone new. 
Jeonghan lets out a low whistle. “Sheesh.”
“You can say that again.” You set your phone down, grabbing at your bellini, and relaxing against the patio chair, trying to soak up the sunshine in an effort to calm yourself.
“Well? What did he say?” your cousin presses.
“He said his entire week is free if I want to meet up.”
“And what did you say?” 
“Nothing.” You tip your head back, letting out a contented breath. “He had two chances, I’m not about to give him a third.”
“Summer is almost over,” Jeonghan points out. “I know you wanted to find some hot dude with a motorcycle and ride off into the sunset. You’re getting low on time.”
“Honestly, Hannie? This Jeon guy is not worth it.”
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One
After a long winter, it’s finally getting warm enough that you can open your apartment windows and enjoy the fresh air. Trees are beginning to blossom, birds are singing songs that act as white noise while you sit at your dining table completing the last few emails for your remote job.
As you’re finishing up your very last correspondence of the day, new noises join in with the robbins and wrens. These noises, however, are nowhere near as pleasant.
There’s a banging outside your door, a few thumps, and a distinctly male voice cursing. 
Living in a fairly quiet apartment complex, these sorts of sounds aren’t something you’re used to, and they can only mean one thing; your landlord finally found new tenants for the two-bedroom next door that’s been vacant for over a month. 
With a sigh, you close your laptop, wrapping your sweater tightly around your body as you venture toward your door. You can’t help the curiosity bubbling inside of you, and after another deep breath, you decide to take a peak into the hallway beyond.
Two men are struggling to get a couch through the doorway into unit 317. You stay silent, watching the way one man’s biceps bulge with each maneuver. His hair is on the longer side, dark strands licking and curling at his throat, which is covered in a light sheen of sweat from the effort of moving. 
“Come on Cheol, we’re almost there,” he encourages the man holding up the other end of the sofa. 
“Fuck you, Mingyu,” the other says, stepping back into the apartment and out of your view.
You wait patiently, and after a minute or so, the pretty man moves into the hallway again, giving you a full view of his face. He lets out a deep breath, shaking out his muscular arms- that’s when his eyes meet yours, and you swear your heart skips a beat in your chest.
His mouth curves into a wide grin. “Hi! Sorry if we bugged you with the noise- that couch was not making moving easy.”
“It’s okay,” you assure him quickly. “You must be my new neighbours.” Your gaze shifts past him to the second man, who has appeared in the hallway too.
“Nah- I mean, I am, but this is Cheol, he’s just a friend,” the pretty man tries to explain, stopping in front of you. He wipes his hand along his jean leg, then holds it out to you, “I’m Mingyu.”
You allow him to shake your hand. Despite his attempt to wipe some of the sweat away, his palm is still a little clammy, although, you’re shocked to find that the physical contact isn’t unpleasant. 
You tell him your name, watching Cheol trudge past you to the elevator. “So if that guy isn’t your roommate, who is?”
“My buddy Wonwoo. He’s actually visiting family in Korea right now, won’t be moving in till the end of the month.”
“I see,” you nod. “Well, welcome to the building.” 
“Thanks,” Mingyu beams again. “If all our neighbours are as friendly as you, I think we’ll like it here.”
“If I’m being honest, we’re a quiet building, lots of us are kind of reclusive,” you try to explain, choosing your words carefully. 
You hear Cheol let out a chuckle as he waits for the elevator, and you wonder what he’s found so funny.
“Quiet,” Mingyu repeats, letting out a breath. “Noted. We’ll do our best not to be a disruption.”
You want to believe him, but something in his grin tells you not to. 
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Two 
It’s been about a month and a half since Mingyu moved in. You’ve not seen him, or his roommate, although, you have heard them through your shared wall a few times. One of them - Wonwoo you’re guessing- is pretty into video games, because yelled lines like ‘I’m trying to revive you, dipshit!’ and ‘stop fucking dying so much then!’ have irritated you and interrupted your soft girl movie nights. 
From what you can tell, Mingyu’s elusive friend who was visiting Korea is now sharing his bedroom wall with you, and at two AM on a Tuesday night, your suspicion is confirmed. You wake to noises that aren’t gamer screams, they’re screams of pleasure. 
Muffled cries of “harder, daddy!” and “please!” have your skin tingling as you shift under your duvet, feeling suddenly very hot. 
As you lay there and listen to the sound of a headboard beginning to hit the wall, you try to decide if you’re annoyed, or horny. The tingling between your thighs, and the heat along your neck makes you think it might be a combination of both.
Part of you wants to bang your fist against the wall, but you’re much too shy to risk any sort of confrontation. Instead, you simply lay there, fighting the need to slip your hand down your sleeping shorts.
You figure the sex will be over soon, but five minutes stretches into fifteen. The woman’s cries have stopped, but the low thumping of a bedframe against the wall has only gotten more intense. 
You’re no stranger to kinky shit- you’re an avid reader of smut afterall, and being a voracious reader, your mind comes up with reasons why the girl may have stopped begging. Had Wonwoo put something in her mouth to shut her up? Panties perhapse? Or had he flipped her into doggy position, pressing a hand to the back of her head to force her face against the pillows?
If Mingyu had been hot, his best friend must be sexy too- guys like that travel in packs, and Cheol hadn’t been bad on the eyes either. You imagine a faceless man, muscled and gorgeous, railing some girl not four feet away from you, with only a wall keeping you from seeing the perverse act. You feel dirty, like a voyeur, and you’re equal parts relieved and saddened when the noise finally stops. 
You sit in silence, listening to your own heavy breaths for a few minutes, wondering if the sounds will pick up again.
They don’t, and soon, you’re drifting off into a lusty sleep.
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Three 
You’ve been awoken to the sounds of sex three times now. The idea of approaching the property manager to file a noise complaint has been on your mind, but you can’t find it within yourself to make waves.
Due to all of this, when you finally bump into Mingyu in the building’s shared laundry room, you see it as the perfect chance to quietly resolve the issue without causing trouble. 
He’s dressed in gym shorts and a black muscle shirt that shows off his expansive shoulders as he moves wet clothes into the dryer. Standing in the doorway of the laundry room, you’re once again struck by how beautiful your new neighbour is.
With a deep breath to find courage, you appraoch him, going for the washing machine next to his. “Hi,” you greet him.
“Oh, hey neighbour,” Mingyu grins, pausing what he’s doing to look you up and down.
You’re hyper aware of the sleeping shorts that hardly cover your legs, and the sweater you’d tossed on does little to hide the fact that you’re currently braless. Even so, if you don’t bring up the noises now, you’re not sure when you’ll get another chance.
“Hey, do you uh
” your words come out quiet, and you try to raise your voice a little, wanting to sound confident, “do you think you could ask your roommate and his girlfriend to keep it down?” 
“Huh?” Mingyu’s brows furrow in confusion.
“The person whose room is next to mine,” you try to explain. “They’ve been kind of loud with uh
 a girl, recently.”
“Oh!” You can practically see the lighbulb go off in Mingyu’s eyes. “Sorry, you said girlfriend, and that part stumped me. The last time was about a week ago, yeah?”
“Something like that.”
“Don’t worry, I already talked to him a few days ago. Told him to get his fuck buddies to keep it down- they’re annoying, huh? I thought I was the only one losing sleep over it.”
“Definitely not the only one,” you let out a small laugh. “If I’m being honest, I was considering talking to the property manager about it, but I don’t like to cause issues, so I’m glad we’re on the same page about this.”
“We’re for sure on the same page,” Mingyu assures you. “Thanks for not talking to the manager about this- hey, listen, what if I give you my number, and if it happens again, you just have to text me and I’ll go bang on his door or something?”
“I’d appreciate that,” you grin, watching him pull out his phone so he can grab your digits. “Honestly, I work from home, and for the most part, you guys have been pretty great neighbours.”
“Ooh, one of those post covid remote jobs,” Mingyu nods in understanding. “I mean, I’m out during the days usually, I work at a tattoo shop across town, and Wonwoo sleeps most of the time so he can be awake for his evening bar job.”
“That actually kind of makes sense,” you admit. “I never see you guys around.” 
“Well
” Mingyu leans against the dryer, flashing you a boyish grin. “We could change that. You could come over sometime.”
Your heart leaps into your throat. From his body language, and the suggestion, you’re pretty sure this gorgeous man is flirting with you. “I, uh
” you swallow thickly, “maybe.” 
“Well, I have your number, and now
” Mingyu types something into his phone and a moment later yours dings, “you have mine. So if you want to take me up on that offer, just shoot me a text.” 
“Okay.” The words comes out kind of shaky, and you internally smack yourself for becoming so shy from this pretty man hitting on you.
With a wink, Mingyu leaves the laundry room, and your thoughts are scattered for the rest of the day.
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Four 
It’s been too long since you’ve seen all your friends from highschool. Soonyoung, Seokmin and Seungkwan are three of the rowdiest guys you know. They love doing bar crawls with you whenever they’re all in town and can find the time. 
Seungkwan lives in another city these days, studying law at a prestigious university. Soonyoung travels the country with dance troup. And Seokmin spends hours every day at the theater practicing for new performances and productions.
They’ve taken you to a bar you’ve never been to, and you’re enjoying the booth style seating. Millennial and old classics are playing through the speakers, and every time a good song comes on, the three men start singing, whether it be Cher, or Britney, or even Kesha. 
You’re a few drinks deep, but they’re even deeper, and it’s gotten to the part of the evening where they want to hear everything about your love life. 
“Okay, book girlie,” Soonyoung slurs, throwing his arm around your shoulders, “spill the beans. Who you fucking?”
You laugh, pushing at his cheek to get his face away from yours. He wreaks of tequila and the Gucci cologne he practically drowns himself in every night before going out. It’s not the most pleasant combination.
“I’m single,” you insist.
“We all know you always have your eye on someone,” Seungkwan insists, leaning over the table to point his finger at you. “Tell us.”
“Okay, maybe there is someone I’m interested in,” you admit.
All three men let out delighted squeals and laughs. “We knew it!” Seokmin exclaims.
“The issue is, he’s my neighbour, and dating in your apartment building can get messy,” you explain. 
“We love messy,” Soonyoung insists. 
“You love messy,” you correct.
“So who’s this hot neighbour?” Seungkwan asks, wanting to dive into the gossip.
“His name is Mingyu.” You let out a sigh. “He’s tall, and handsome, and his arms-”
“Does he have a motorcycle?” Soonyoung interrupts you. “We know you love men with bikes.”
“I don’t think so,” you shake your head. “But it doesn’t matter. My motorcycle phase was last summer.”
“Baby,” Seungwan frowns dramatically, “Honey, sweetheart- You’re a booktok girl. We all know kinky little sluts like you need their bikertok boy to make their fantasies come true.”
You hate it when Seungkwan reads you to filth like this, and you hate it even more that he’s so right. You’ll always have a soft spot for men on motorcycles- or is it a wet spot?
“Anyways, Mingyu is cute, he gave me his number and invited me over-”
“Bitch, go fuck him!” Soonyoung bellows a little too loudly, and you immediately slap a hand over his mouth, looking around to see if anyone heard him.
That’s when your eyes land on a man behind the bar. His curly dark hair is cute, but when you study his regally handsome face, you realize you recougnize him.
“Fuck,” you whisper, immediately lifting your drink to hide behind it.
“What?” Seungkwan turns in his seat. “The bartender?”
“Babes, he’s been checking you out all night,” Soonyoung grins, cuddling closer to you.
It’s only Seokmin who studies you and asks, “Do you know him?”
“The bartender?” Seungkwan scoffs, as if it’s a stupid idea, although, when he turns to look at you again, his jaw drops. “Fuck, you do know him! Girl, spill!” 
“Do you guys remember that Harley dude from the summer? Jeon? The one I ghosted after he missed our first date then suggested a ride night with all his friends to make up for it?” you ask, lowering your voice and continuing to hide behind the glass in your hand.
“Shit, that’s the Harley dude?” Seokmin’s eyes widen in realization. 
“Fuck me, this is awkward,” you groan, taking a large sip from your drink. “Can we get out of here?”
“Babes, we just ordered another round,” Seungkwan points out, lifting his full Gin and Tonic to show you. 
“Don’t be like this,” Soonyoung pouts. “Harley man is a bartender, so what? He can’t ruin our night. Maybe he doesn’t even recougnize you!”
“If he’s been staring, I bet you he does,” Seungkwan points out, taking a swig of his drink.
“Thanks, Seungkwan,” you say sarcastically, “that really makes me feel so much better.”
Your friend only grins, raising his glass. 
You do your best to be calm, but you can’t control the racing of your heart. Your gaze keeps shifting to Jeon, and then, the night takes a turn for the worse: Mingyu walks in, followed closely by Cheol, and some other guy you haven’t met.
The group walks right up to the bartop, and you note the way Mingyu grins at Jeon, holding out a hand so the two can do a slight hug over the counter before the three men take their seats. 
“Shit,” you whisper, downing your drink. 
“What?” Soonyoung also whispers, following your gaze.
“That’s my neighbour,” you explain. “This is not good.”
“Looks like they know each other,” Seungkwan points out.
“Again,” you sigh, “not helping. Fuck me, I need to go to the bathroom.”
You stand abruptly from the table, darting off to the space at the back of the bar. In the ladies room, you splash your hands with cold water, trying to chase away the fire that licks across your skin. Your heart is still thundering in your chest, and deep breaths don’t do anything to help. 
You feel like you’re caged in- like there’s no way out of this bar without running into Jeon and Mingyu. 
You’re not sure how long you stay in the washroom, trying to relax- you give your friends time to finish their drinks, and you’re hoping that when you exit, you can simply escape with them, using the three men as a human shield.
When you exit the bathroom, however, you run directly into Mingyu, who’s just coming out of the men’s room.
“Sorry-” he apologizes, only to look you up and down. “No way! Neighbour? Damn, I didn’t expect to see you here!”
“Oh, hi,” you say awkwardly, forcing a smile.
“How’s your night going?” You usually like Mingyu’s happy energy, but right now, it feels nearly overwhelming.
“Good, you?”
“My night’s going great- hey, listen, I want you to meet someone!” Mingyu grabs your hand, and before you can stop him, your large neighbour is dragging you back out into the bar. 
As he tugs you closer and closer to Jeon, pieces begin to click in your head, and when you reach the bartop, you’re not even surprised when Mingyu says, “This is Wonwoo, my roommate!” He had mentioned Wonwoo worked at a bar, after all. 
“Hi,” you say awkwardly, forcing get another smile.
Jeon - or Wonwoo - looks you up and down. God, he’s even more handsome than his Tinder pictures had made him out to be. But fuck, you’ve heard him fucking other girls through your bedroom wall over three times- and you’d ghosted him-
“Hi,” Wonwoo echoes, his voice all deep and sexy in the loud noise of the bar.
You feel like the wind has been knocked out of you. 
“Wonwoo, this is our neighbour, you know, the one I mentioned.” There’s an insinuation in Mingyu’s tone, and the fact that he’d talked about you to Wonwoo has your stomach erupting into erratic butterflies that threaten to catch in your throat.
“Right.” Wonwoo’s tone is so unimpressed, and you’d bet your life the man is holding a grudge over the whole ghosting thing.
“Wait, Y/N, you should join us for a drink!” Mingyu suggests.
“Actually, I’m here with friends, I should really get back to them,” you say awkwardly, tugging your hand away from Mingyu’s grip. “Thanks for the offer though.”
“Right, yeah, okay.” God, Mingyu looks like a kicked puppy, but then he flashes you a smile and your heart melts. “Listen, text me, just to let me know when you get home safe.”
“You got it,” you agree quickly, giving him a tight lipped grin before you nearly stumble over yourself to get back to your table. “Guys, we have to leave, now.” 
“What happened?” Seokmin asks, clearly concerned while Seungkwan sighs and pulls out a wad of cash.
“They do know each other,” Soonyoung blurts out.
“Turns out Harley Jeon isn’t just Harley Jeon, he’s also Wonwoo, Mingyu’s roommate,” you quickly explain, grabbing your jacket to wrap around your body.
Soonyoung’s eyes light up in realization. “And they were roommates,” he whispers.
“And I ghosted one of them!” you whisper yell back. “The same one who I’ve heard fucking multiple girls through my wall over three times!”
Seungkwan lets out a chuckle. “Girl. You’re fucked.” 
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Five 
Jeonghan lets out a deep sigh. “You know, when Seokmin texted me to come check on you for some Grade-A Tea, I never expected any of this.” 
“Yeah, yeah,” you roll your eyes. “I know I’m in deep shit.”
“Nah, you’re good,” your cousin assures you, standing and stretching. “You’ll figure it out.”
“I wish I had the confidence in myself that you have in me,” you breathe, also rising to your feet. Jeonghan’s been over for a while now, and after giving him all the gossip, you feel like you could use some time to yourself. 
“You’ll get there,” your cousin assures you, heading toward your front door so he can slip into his shoes. “Keep me updated.”
“I will. Thanks for coming to see me.”
“Of course,” Jeonghan opens your front door, stepping into the hallway before pulling you into a hug. “If I didn’t have a board meeting tomorrow, you know I’d stay longer.”
“I know. But I’m good,” you assure him. “I think I’ll sleep early tonight. This week has been a lot.”
“Sounds like it,” he nods, releasing you in favor of heading over to the elevator. Before he can press the button, however, the elevator dings, the doors opening. Wonwoo steps out. He stops infront of Jeonghan, giving him a once over before his eyes shift to you, still standing by the doorway to your unit.
Then, to your annoyance, Wonwoo grins, shaking his head and brushing past your cousin.
Jeonghan gets into the elevator, the doors closing, and as Wonwoo walks past you, you can’t help but make waves. “What?”
“I never said anything.” Wonwoo stops in front of you, hands nonchalantly tucked in the leather pockets of his jacket.
“You gave me a look,” you insist. 
He shrugs. “It’s just gonna break Gyu’s heart to know you already have a man in your life, that’s all.”
You roll your eyes. “That was my cousin.”
“Sure it was.”
“It was!” You can’t help the way your voice is raising.
“And the guys at the bar?”
“Friends!” 
“Right.” 
He turns to leave, and you swallow thickly, mind reeling for a comeback.
“I just don’t see how you can be making assumptions about me,” you state.
Wonwoo stops, gaze finding you again. “What do you mean?”
“Just that.. I mean
 I’ve heard you fucking girls, mister Jeon, if that’s even your real name!” 
He actually grins at your words, eye brows raising in surprise. “Girl, actually, singular. It was one girl. A recent hookup. She’s not into gags like the others, they’re generally pretty quiet for you, aren’t they?” 
You’re so shocked by what he’s just said that you physically take a step back, jaw dropping.
“Oh, and by the way,” Wonwoo heads to his door, reaching into his jacket for his keys. “Mister Jeon is what people call my father, I’m sure you know that I prefer to be called Daddy.” 
He unlocks his apartment, flashing you a wink before he heads inside. You stand in your doorway for a solid ten seconds, processing his words before you go back to your room to scream into a pillow.
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Six
After the events of the week, and work on top of that, a nap the moment you're done sending the last emails of the day is exactly what you need.
Birds are singing outside, your window ajar. The warming air carries the scent of blossoming buds, and you relax against your pillow, enjoying the feeling of your duvet against your skin.
You’re just drifting off when a loud engine jolts you back into consciousness. You flop onto your back, staring at the ceiling. 
You’ve been a motorcycle fan for long enough to know the sound of one when you hear it, and as the revving continues, you’d bet your right hand that some jackass is doing burnouts in the alley outside.
It’s probably some enthusiastic douchebag who has finally brought their motorcycle out of the garage after a long winter-
Actually, wait. You know an asshole with a motorcycle. An asshole with a Harley to be exact. 
Fucking Jeon Wonwoo. 
God, you hate that man.
Grabbing your pillow, you burry your head under it, wishing for the sounds to stop. 
Surprisingly, soon enough, you hear the motorcycle take off, with two more engines revving up to follow. 
Your apartment complex used to be so nice and peaceful.
It used to be.
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Seven
After your nap had been interrupted, you’d trudged around for a while. It’s the evening now, and you have no energy to cook, so you’ve ordered takeout. When you head down to the lobby to  grab your food, you bump into Mingyu.
“Look at us, always running into each other,” he grins, watching you step by him to bend down and pick up your takeout.
“Seems like a common theme,” you agree, letting out a sigh.
“You good, neighbour? You look tired.”
“You want the truth?” you ask, straightening to look at him.
“Always.” He holds the door open for you to come back into the apartment complex. 
As you head to the elevator, you choose your words carefully, after all, you’re pretty sure Wonwoo was culprit behind the motorcycle incident two hours ago. “I just
 I was trying to have a nap after work, been tired lately, and some guy was revving his motorcycle outside my window. He woke me up and I was too irritated to go back to sleep.”
As you enter the elevator, you notice Mingyu’s skin turning pink, and his adam’s apple bobs as he swallows thickly. “Actually
 uh
 I, uh
” He rubs the back of his neck. “I have a Harley, but uh, I got a new sportsbike, and that was me doing burnouts to test it out a little.”
Your heart lurches into your throat, your jaw dropping. When it comes to your neighbours in 317, you always find yourself conflicted. You’re annoyed at him, but at the same time, the fact that he also has a motorcycle makes this ten out of ten man even ten times hotter-
“Oh,” you look down at your takeout. 
“I’m really sorry,” he apologizes quickly. “It won’t happen again- you won’t tell our building manager it was me right? Like, we’re good?”
“Yeah, we’re good,” you let out a breath. “I mean, technically quiet hours don’t start till ten pm, and this was like, five, so I guess it’s my own fault for trying to nap so early.”
“Not your fault,” he assures you. “You definitely look like you need some rest- if it helps, I promise no burnouts near the apartment.” Mingyu even crosses his heart, and your body relaxes, shoulders slumping as you crack a smile.
“Okay, that would be nice.”
The elevator dings as it reaches your floor, and the two of you exit together, closing the short distance to your door. 
“Your takeout smells good,” Mingyu notes. “Maybe you could put yourself in a food coma and pass out for a bit, I promise there will be no noise issues tonight.”
“That sounds nice, actually,” you admit.
“Also uh
 you know, you still haven’t taken me up on that offer about coming over sometime.”
When you look over at Mingyu, you find him leaning against the hallway wall, staring down at you with soft puppy dog eyes.
“Yeah, I’ve been busy-” you search for an excuse. “Also, I mean, I don’t know if Wonwoo would be good with me coming over.”
“Why wouldn’t he be?” Mingyu shrugs, which is when you realize that Wonwoo must not have told Mingyu anything about your failed dates or the ghosting. 
“He just didn’t seem to like me very much when you introduced us,” you blurt out, grasping for straws.
“He always has a resting bitch face, don’t take it personally,” Mingyu assures you. “Seriously, come over sometime, we don’t bite.”
Mingyu might not, but you get the sneaking suspicion that Wonwoo does.
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Eight
The reverse harem adult romance your reading had drawn you in when you’d first opened it, but as time goes by, your mind keeps wandering when you reach the sex scenes. 
Threesomes have you imagining Wonwoo and Mingyu, and try as you might, you can’t shake the image from your head.
It doesn’t help that they fit the character personalities, one puppylike lover, and one more stoic and dominant. You can’t help but wonder what the two would be like in bed, and with a groan of frustration, you slot your bookmark between the pages and set the novel down on the bed next to you.
As you sit there, deep in thought, you think about what Mingyu had said about owning a Harley. 
That’s when you realize, last summer, when Wonwoo had suggested a Harley ride night as a date- if you had gone with him, would you have met Mingyu?
You decide that Mingyu definitely would have been there.
It’s interesting how the domino effect works- or maybe this is invisible string theory; the idea that, you can pass someone, or have missed chances, but one way or another, that person will always end up in your life.
What would have happened if you’d met Mingyu that way? 
What would have happened if you’d met Wonwoo that way? 
At the moment, there’s no question as to which of the two neighbours you prefer. Mingyu is happy and welcoming, he always has a smile, and you could see yourself having a great relationship with him- if things were to take a turn that way.
But on the flip side, Wonwoo is more similar to the type you’ve dated in the past.
If one neighbour is a Doberman, then the other is a Golden Retriever. They’re like night and day, and yet, you’re drawn to both, as if some gravitational or celestial power is pulling you to them
 it also helps that they both have motorcycles. 
How had it been so easy to ghost Wonwoo in the past, only to find yourself at a crossroads with his roommate seven months later?
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Nine
You’re outside your apartment waiting for an Uber when two familiar men on motorcycles pull up in front of you. 
Wonwoo’s on his Harley. It’s all black, and although you’re not very well verses with motorcycle types, you’re pretty sure it’s a Fat Boy or a Street Bob- but as you stare at the wheels, you begin to lean toward Street Bob. 
Mingyu, in contrast, is on a red Kawasaki Ninja, which is evident by the name on the side. He lifts up his visor when he comes to a stop two feet away. “Hey, neighbour,” he greets you. “Waiting for someone?”
“An Uber is picking me up.”
“An Uber?” Mingyu looks around. “Where are you headed?”
“A family thing. We’re going to be drinking so I figured I shouldn’t drive,” you explain.
“Good idea,” he nods, then, without skipping a beat, he asks, “Wanna ride?”
You gaze shifts from Mingyu to Wonwoo, and you can practically see the Harley rider roll his eyes. With an aggressive rev of his engine, Wonwoo bolts off, leaving you and Mingyu in his dust.
“Uh, don’t you two have plans?” you ask.
“We did, but we were just going for a ride. I can take you where you need to be and meet him later,” Mingyu shrugs. “Seriously, don’t mind him.”
You’ve been on a motorcycle once before, and you know enough to understand that the short romper and light spring jacket you’re wearing is not enough to protect you on the back of a bike. And that’s the least of your worries. “I don’t have a helmet-”
Mingyu begins to undo his, and you watch in shock as he pulls it off, shaking out his hair and offering you the red head gear. “Take mine.”
“Isn’t it illegal to ride without one?”
“We’ll be fast- but not dangerous, I’ll be good, I promise. Where are we going?”
With a deep breath, you pull up your Aunt’s house on your phone’s map app, showing it to Mingyu. 
“I can get you there in ten minutes, easy,” he says. 
“This is not a good idea,” you warn, although you accept the helmet. 
“Cancel your Uber,” Mingyu urges softly. “Let me do this for you.”
With one last sigh, you cancel your ride, then, you allow Mingyu to help you onto the back of his bike. 
“Have you ever been on one of these before?” he asks.
“Once,” you admit, adjusting the helmet on your head before you tentatively wrap your arms around Mingyu’s large body. 
“Just hold on tight.”
“Take care of me,” you retort.
Mingyu grins. “Always.”
A moment later, he’s revving his engine, and the two of you take off on his bike, your clothes whipping around and contorting flat to the curves of your form.
You hold Mingyu tighter, and he takes one hand off his handlebars to rest it over yours for a second, giving you a reassuring squeeze.
When he pulls onto the main road, Mingyu is true to his word about not being dangerous. He doesn’t lane split or push the bike too hard. When you come up to traffic, he waits patiently, resting his elbow on your knee as if this is something the two of you have done together a hundred times before.
You become so lost in how attracted you are to Mingyu- how you have to hug him tight when he accelerates, that the trip is over before you know it. He pulls up to your aunts house, turning to offer you a hand so you can get off the Ninja. 
Your legs feel wobbly as you step on solid ground, and Mingyu helps you with the chin clasp of the helmet, removing it easily. 
“Thanks for being my backpack,” he smiles.
“Thanks for giving me a ride,” you grin back.
“If you want, you can text me when you’re done, and I’ll get you home safe. I’ll even bring a spare helmet this time, and maybe a proper riding jacket for you.”
“That would be really nice actually.”
“You got it, angel,” Mingyu flashes you a wink before he pulls the helmet onto his head. You move to the sidewalk, standing there to watch him as he gives you one last nod and takes off, the engine loud enough to be heard even as he makes it two blocks away in record time.
A low whistle startles you, and you turn to see Jeonghan standing in the driveway. “Damn, that dude was hot.”
“That’s my neighbour,” you sigh.
“Which one?”
“The good one!”
“You should take him up on that offer of hanging out,” Jeonghan suggests.
“And you should keep your nose out of my love life.”
Your cousin simply laughs. “Never going to happen.”
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Ten
The jacket Mingyu brings for you when he picks you up from your family gathering is long enough to be a dress. You struggle with the thick material as you try to get on his bike, and you can see Mingyu grinning from the opening in his full face helmet.
“That’s it,” he encourages you, allowing you to settle behind him.
You pat his thigh when you’re good to go, and the two of you slot down your visors before he takes off.
It’s the late evening now, and being on his bike feels different in the dark. The city lights whip past you, and the lanes are pretty empty for Mingyu to go faster. Now that you’re both in full protective gear, there’s not as much of a need to be safe, although, as you hold tightly to your neighbour, you realize this might be as safe as you’ve ever felt.
You trust Mingyu, in a way that you can’t quite explain. 
As it was before, it’s easy to get lost in the act of being on Mingyu’s motorcycle, and before you know it, he’s pulling into your apartment complex’s underground garage. 
You hate that the ride has ended so quickly, and you hate it even more that you have to let go of Mingyu’s large, warm body. You stand next to the motorcycle while he gets off of it, and you wait patiently for him to take off his helmet before he helps you with your own.
“Do you have plans for the rest of the night?” Mingyu asks while the two of you walk toward the elevator.
“Not really,” you admit. In fact, you’re feeling a little tired. You hadn’t drank as much at the family dinner as you thought you would, and sleep sounds pretty good right about now.
“Do you wanna come see my place?”
“I really shouldn’t-”
“If you’re worried about Wonwoo, he went to work before I came to pick you up,”  Mingyu tells you. “Come on, just one drink or something. Don’t you wanna compare your one bedroom to my two bedroom?”
You are curious to see what sort of decorations these two men have- they’re mid to late twenties at best, and you love to laugh. 
“Fine, one drink,” you let out a breath as you enter the elevator, turning to look up at Mingyu. “Why do you care so much if I come over? Like, honestly?”
Mingyu meets your gaze, fiddling with the helmet in his hand. “I guess maybe
 because I like you.” He shrugs. “You’re a good neighbour, and an even better backpack. You look cute in my jacket- why wouldn’t I want to get to know you better?”
“That’s a good answer,” you admit with a laugh.
“I’m glad you liked it,” he grins. 
When the two of you exit the elevator, you follow Mingyu past your apartment to his own door. You watch the way he pulls out his keys, fumbling a little to get into his place. He lets you enter first, and you step into the foreign home with a curious gaze.
You slip out of your shoes, undoing his jacket around your shoulders as you wander further into the apartment. The two men are cleaner than you would have expected. The furniture is minimalist, and mostly cream coloured- which isn’t a shade you would have thought would match the motorcycle riding, black wearing men. You wonder how the couch in the den is so well kept- there’s not a hint of stains on the nicely textured cover, no beer or food-
There’s no dirty dishes in the sink, no miscellaneous bowl of car keys and other shit that guys always tend to carry in their pockets.
In fact, this place almost looks like a ‘girl sanctuary,’ the type of pintrest board apartment inspo you’d find online. 
“What do you think?” Mingyu asks, coming up behind you and helping you take off his jacket.
“It’s really nice,” you say honestly. “Not what I expected.”
“I’m a bit of a neat freak,” he admits with a chuckle.
So he’s big, muscled, kind, rides a motorcycle, and he knows how to do housewife cleaning duties? How did you ever manage to score a jackpot like him for a neighbour? 
“Anyways, take a seat on the couch, I’ll grab some beer. You drink beer, right?”
“Sure.” You move to settle into the sofa, and Mingyu brings over two cans of lager from the fridge, cracking one open before he hands it to you. 
“Cheers,” he grins, gently clinking his can against your own. 
You take a sip, focusing on the way Mingyu sits on the other end of the couch, angling his body toward you. “So
 you mentioned you work at a tattoo parlour? How did you get into that?”
“I’ve always been into art,” he explains. “My buddy Cheol was more into tattoos with me, opened up his own shop and encouraged me to apprentice with him after I graduated from uni with my arts degree. I wish there was more to it, but I really just got kind of lucky.”
The list of his good qualities just keeps getting better and better- a university educated man? Yes please.
“I guess, maybe what I’m wondering is why you don’t have any tattoos yourself?” you ask, looking at the beautiful unblemished skin shown off by his muscle shirt.
Mingyu laughs, also gazing down at his arms. “Would you judge me if I told you I’m scared of needles.”
“That’s cute,” you grin, sipping your beer. 
“You’re cute,” he retorts, mirroring your motion and trying to hide his smile behind the can in his hand. “Anyways, you said you’d been on a motorcycle before?”
“Yeah, just once.”
“Tell me about it?”
“There’s nothing much to say,” you admit. “Went on a date with a guy, he mentioned he had a sports bike, offered to take me for a ride, so I said yes.”
“So
” Mingyu taps his fingers along his beer can, “you like guys with bikes?”
You let out a laugh. “Maybe.” 
“I’m feeling better and better about my odds,” Mingyu smiles. 
“Your odds are very good,” you tell him. Now it’s your turn to drink in an effort to hide the massive grin on your face.
“Yeah? I was a little worried, I mean, I gave you my number and you didn’t text- took a little bit of convincing to get you on my bike, to get you into the apartment- I hope I didn’t overstep anything there.”
“No, you’re fine,” you assure him. “I can just
 be a bit shy sometimes.”
“It’s cute though.”
Your skin heats at the compliment, heart thundering in your rib cage. “What about you? I’m into bikes, are you into cute girls?”
“A hundred percent,” he nods. “They’re my favourite kind.”
“Do you have any experience dating neighbours?”
“No, but I’d like that to change.”
“Do you think being neighbours could complicate things?” you enquire.
“I mean
 if I didn’t see you as girlfriend material, then yeah, I’d never turn a neighbour into a hookup, but then again, I’m not huge into hookups to begin with,” Mingyu explains.
“You know
 I’m trying to find even one red flag about you, and I’m seriously coming up empty.”
“Is that such a bad thing?”
You smile, looking down at your nearly finished beer. “I guess not.”
“How about you? Any red flags?” he asks. 
Aside from the downright pornographic books you read on the daily? “Probably not.”
“Probably not, huh?” Mingyu chuckles. “Maybe I should be the one keeping a look out for red, but then again, with rose tinted glasses, red wouldn’t stand out that much to me anyways.” 
You’d not expected your night to turn out like this. You’d figured it would be a nice family dinner, some drinking, then an Uber home and sleep. Instead, you’ve been on Mingyu’s bike twice, worn his jacket, his helmet- and now you’re here in his house, with your hot neighbour flirting with you in the most wholesome way-
In your tired state, you’re feeling a little overwhelmed. Your shyness is taking over- the fear of the unknown, of making a misstep, clouding your enjoyment of the peaceful space Mingyu has created in his apartment.
“Listen, don’t take this the wrong way,” you sigh, finishing your beer, “But I’m really tired-”
“Yeah, no worries, I said just one beer and it looks like you’re done,” Mingyu is quick to down the rest of his, reaching out to take your can so he can move to the kitchen. He places the empties under his sink, and you follow, keeping your distance.
“Thank you for this though. I know we didn’t talk for that long, but I feel like I know you better,” you admit. 
“I’ve still got a lot of questions for you,” he grins. “But I’ll save those for another time. I’m not about to get in the way of a girl and her beauty sleep.”
“I appreciate that.” The two of you head to his door, and you slip your shoes on.
“Can I give you a goodbye hug or something?” Mingyu suggests. “It would feel weird letting you leave without one.”
You nod, allowing Mingyu to pull you close to his chest. He’s so tall, your cheek pressed tight to his well defined pecs- and fuck, he smells good. This isn’t the overpowering Gucci type cologne that Soonyoung wears, it’s a more muted, spicy yet clean scent. It’s the type of scent that encourages you to take a deep breath, your body relaxing as your neighbour hugs you.
“Thanks for coming over,” Mingyu whispers.
When you go to pull away, you find yourself tilting your head to look up at him. Your eyes meet, and it feels as if you’re hanging in a moment frozen in time. Your breath catches when his gaze dips down to your mouth, and you know what’s coming next.
His hand cups your cheek, stroking your skin, and he gives you ample opportunity to pull away, but you don’t. You simply stare into his beautiful chocolate brown eyes, waiting for him to make the move that you know is going to capture your heart completely.
When his lips finally touch yours, that sense of relief washes over you again. You shift in his embrace, wrapping your arms around the back of his neck to pull him closer. Mingyu lets out a soft sigh of contentment, parting his mouth ever so slightly so he can lick at your lower lip.
You mirror the motion, your tongues gently clashing. 
You’ve met some guys who try to force their way into your mouth, who try to dominate you- but Mingyu isn’t like that. He’s soft and fluid, reacting to your movements moreso than anything else. His hands slip down to your hips, holding you close while you kiss each other.
No first kiss has ever felt this natural, and like with riding the bike, it becomes so easy to get lost in your neighbour.
When you finally break away, you’re both breathing heavily. You can taste the beer on your lips, and it makes you release a small laugh, giddy joy surging through your entire body.
“That was
” Mingyu swallows thickly, “wow.”
“Yeah,” you agree. “Wow.” 
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Eleven
It’s been two weeks since you started getting to know Mingyu better. You’ve gone on motorcycle dates, stopped at food trucks while enjoying the sunshine of spring, and when Wonwoo’s not around, Mingyu has invited you over for movie nights.
While there’s been lots of kissing, and a growing desire for more, the two of you haven’t gone much farther than second base. You kind of like taking things slow with Mingyu, he’s very good at not applying any pressure, and you adore that about him.
You’re hanging out in your apartment when Mingyu calls you, asking if you have any garlic he can borrow for his meal plan. Part of you thinks it’s a little late for dinner, but you agree anyways. 
Sometimes you think he comes up with this sort of thing just to see you, stealing kisses at your door- but this time, when he comes over to grab ingredients, he doesn’t simply wait in the hallway.
“Can I come in?” he asks, peering at your apartment beyond.
“Come in?” you repeat.
“Yeah, I mean, you’ve seen my place, and I haven’t really gotten to see yours yet.” He sounds nonchalant, but you can tell that your personal space - the way you conduct yourself in your own home - is something that makes him curious.
“Okay.” You step away from the door. “Come on in.”
Mingyu bends down to kiss you as he steps over the threshold, and you grin against his lips, enjoying the way his hands softly grab your waist. 
“I’m guessing you didn’t really need garlic, did you?” you tease.
“Nope, I ate dinner after work.” Mingyu takes his shoes off while you close the door behind him, and he looks around your apartment. “It’s nice in here.”
“Thank you.”
“Do you want to give me a tour?” he asks.
You let out a giggle. “Okay.” 
You’ve never given a formal tour of your apartment before, but you do your best, showing him through the kitchen and the small living room area. You’ve got certain knick knacks that are special to you, and you explain them to Mingyu while he listens with a smile.
Finally, you make it to your bedroom. Before you can even open your mouth to say anything, Mingyu’s arms are wrapping around you, his chest pressed to your back, lips on your throat.
He already knows your sweet spots, and you let out a soft sigh, tilting your head to make things easier for him.
“Gyu
”
“Do you want me to stop?” he whispers in your ear, nibbling gently on the lobe.
“No.”
You hadn’t expected this tonight, but you’re at a point now where you don’t want to wait. Mingyu isn’t the type to use you and leave you. He’s made his intentions clear, and the sexual chemistry between the two of you is undeniable. 
You find yourself turning in Mingyu’s embrace, cupping his cheek so you can draw his lips to yours. He lets out an immediate groan of satisfaction, and it goes straight to your core, which flutters with delight. You kiss him deeply, pouring all your wants and desires into the meeting of your mouths.
Then your hands find the bottom of his shirt, and before you know it, you’re stripping the fabric from Mingyu’s body and tracing your hands over the muscles you love so much.
His body jolts when you tease your nails across his lower abdomen, and it prompts Mingyu to reach down, cupping your ass and easily lifting you up. Your legs wrap around his hips, tongues clashing in a lusty battle as he carries you to your bed.
Your hands trace along his strong shoulders as he lays you onto the mattress, looking down at you with blown pupils. He’s breathing heavily already, and you can see the bulge of his cock through his jeans. 
You’ve grinded against him before, sitting on his lap on his couch while he rubs your tits through your comfortable evening sweaters, so you know how big Mingyu is, but knowing he’s about to be inside of you makes your heart race in an entirely different way.
“Are you sure you’re okay with this?” Mingyu asks again, straightening to look down at you.
“Uh huh,” you sit up, meeting his gaze. Then you reach out, undoing his buckle while keeping steady eye contact. 
“Fuck,” Mingyu groans, chest heaving with each breath. “You don’t have to-”
“Don’t have to what?” you tease, moving onto the zipper, which you tug down roughly.
“Don’t have to-” he swallows thickly. “I want to make you feel good.” 
“What if you do that after?” you suggest. “I want to make you feel good first.” 
“Fuck, Angel, okay.” 
“Yeah?” You raise a brow at him, hooking your fingers in his jeans and briefs.
“Yeah,” he nods quickly. “Do whatever you want- whatever you want.”
You tug his pants down, allowing them to bag at his knees. You’re already much too focused on the cock in front of you to care about getting him fully undressed.
Your eyes take in Mingyu’s rock hard length. You’re not great with measurements, but you swear he must be seven or eight inches. He’s got a pretty mushroom tip, all flushed and pink. There’s a prominent vein running along the underside of him, and it makes your mouth water.
You haven’t sucked cock in a while, but you’d read a very good erotica about it last night, and you know exactly what to do. 
Grabbing the base of him, you angle Mingyu’s cock slightly upward, running your tongue along the vein.
“Shit,” Mingyu groans, hands flying to your head. He doesn’t apply any pressure, simply strokes you as you take the tip past your lips, suckling on it and twirling your tongue. “You’re- fuck, you’re good at this.”
You let out a happy hum, and the vibration makes him twitch, pushing him further into your mouth. 
Your eyes are closed now, and you allow yourself to enjoy the act of pleasuring Mingyu. After being so patient with you over the past few weeks, he deserves it. The sounds he’s letting out are more than enough encouragement for you, and soon, your drool begins to drip down to your fingers, making it easier for you to pump his neglected shaft.
There’s no way in Hell you’ll ever be able to fit all of him in your mouth, but unless he’s used to dating women schooled in oral aerobics or some shit, you doubt any of his past lovers have ever achieved that feat either.
Instead, you focus most of your attention on the tip, knowing that the head of his cock is where he’s got a lot of his nerve endings. 
Your tongue dips along his slit, tasting the salty precum. Mingyu moans loudly above you, fingers threading through your hair.
“If you keep doing that, I’m gonna cum too fast,” he warns you.
Part of you wants him to cum, so you go even harder- only for Mingyu to gently pull you off of him.
You blink up at the gorgeous man, pleased to find that he’s flushed. His chest, shoulders, neck and cheeks are all a pretty pink colour, and he’s panting heavily. “Seriously, Angel, I don’t want to cum yet.”
“What if I want you to cum?”
“I’m not making you swallow the first time we sleep together,” Mingyu states, and you can tell that it’s a hard boundary. “And I’m not cumming on you either- I think
” he licks his lips, “I think it’s my turn to make you feel good now.” 
“Yeah?”
He nods. “Yeah.”
Then Mingyu leans down over you, grabbing your shirt and tugging it off. Your pants are discarded next, left on the floor next to his own while he adjusts you on your bed.
He’s left your bra and panties on, and when his lips find yours again, you kind of appreciate that he’s intent on more foreplay.
Your core is aching through the cotton fabric, and your nipples are pressing up toward the cups still confining them. It’s driving you crazy as he kisses you deeply, but then one of his hands reaches up to massage you through your bra, and you let out a sinful whine.
“Take it off,” you whimper, “please.”
Mingyu’s mouth moves from your lips to your throat, and he reaches under you, undoing the clasp. He gently pulls the bra from your form, and his kisses finally make it to your breasts. 
His soft hair is teasing your skin with each kiss, but when his lips wrap around your sensitive nipple, you can’t even find it within yourself to care about the slight ticklish sensation. Mingyu’s got your full attention now, his teeth gently dragging across the hardened bud, making you cry out even louder.
You grab at his broad shoulders, holding onto him for dear life, wriggling under his large form. 
His cock is pressing between your legs, rubbing against your pussy through the thin fabric of your panties.
“Fuck, Gyu-” you whimper. “I want you so bad.”
He groans in response, moving to your other breast to pay it as much attention as he had the first. Your neighbour takes his time, and you enjoy every second of it, although you’re absolutely desperate for more.
You want him to take the lead, as you lean more toward a submissive temperament in bed, despite the ballsy way you’d approach sucking his cock for the first time.
You wonder if he’s aching the way you are- if he’s throbbing with need for you the way your pussy is already trying to clench around nothing, anticipating the cock that’s going to split you open in a way that no man ever has before. 
Unable to help yourself anymore, you reach down between your bodies, grabbing his length and pumping him gently. Mingyu groans against your breasts, giving you one last lick before he brings his mouth up to your own again.
“Angel, fuck-” he practically whimpers, thrusting toward your hand. “You’re not ready yet.”
“I’m ready,” you try to assure him.
“Trust me,” Mingyu’s hand slips into your panties, two fingers teasing your core, “As wet as you are, you’re not ready for me.”
“Gyu-” You want to argue, but when he pushes two digits into your core, you realize he’s right. Because even with two fingers, you feel like he’s stretching your tight walls. 
You’re so wet that it makes it easy for Mingyu to begin finger fucking you, his mouth finding your throat so he can kiss your sweet spot desperately while you continue to stroke his cock. 
“Wanna make you cum once,” he groans, “before- fuck, before I take you.”
Your core throbs at his words, and it’s clear from the smile you feel against your skin that Mingyu can feel the way your body is reacting to him.
“Do you like when I talk dirty to you, Angel?” he asks.
“Yeah.” You nod, applying more pressure as you stroke him off.
“You’re already taking my fingers so well, who got you this wet?”
“You did, Gyu,” you whimper.
“Can you cum with just fingers? Or should I rub your sensitive little clit too?”
“My clit-”
His palm immediately finds the bud of nerves, and you let out a strangled gasp, your eyes rolling into the back of your head. “Fuck-” Your hand stops on his cock in favour of grabbing both of his shoulders.
“Like this?” he asks, applying a little more pressure that has you wiggling beneath him. 
“Yeah, just like that,” you groan, threading your fingers through his hair, guiding him to continue kissing your throat while he finger fucks you open.
“Have you wanted this as much as I have?”
“Even more,” you confess.
“Not possible,” he retorts, but by the squelching of your pussy, you’re pretty sure you have him beat. You don’t have the energy or the mental focus to fight him on this, so you simply give in to the pleasure he’s providing you. “So good for me.”
“Gyu-” you whimper, legs shaking as your orgasm builds much too fast in the pit of your stomach.
“Always so good for me,” he continues. “The best backpack. The best neighbour. The best girl-”
You cry out as your orgasm slams into you with no warning. Something about this brand of praise has made you feral, and your core throbs around Mingyu’s fingers as he works you through your high.
“Just like that,” he coos. “So good for me.”
You draw his lips to yours, kissing him breathlessly. He kisses you back, tongue invading your mouth and gently stroking your own.
You’re practically shaking by the time your orgasm is over, and Mingyu pulls his hand out of your panties. “I’m gonna take these off now,” he tells you, pressing a kiss to your nose. “And grab a condom.”
“Actually
” You bite at your lip, meeting his gaze. “I’m on birth control.”
He pauses for a moment, and you can see the wheels practically turning in his head. “And
 I mean, I know I’m clean-”
“I’m clean too,” you assure him. ‘It’s uh
 it’s been a while for me, since I
 well, you know.”
You can feel your skin heating at the admission of your near celibacy over the past few months. While you’ve imagined fucking all sorts of heros and villains in your books, the only thing that’s been inside you recently has been your six inch glittery pink dildo.
“And you uh
 you want me to cum inside?” Mingyu clarifies.
“Please?”
Mingyu lets out a shaky breath, then he nods. “Okay, yeah, I can do that.”
He tugs your panties down your legs, and before you know it, the two of you are completely naked. Mingyu returns between your thighs, his arm muscles bulging as he holds himself over you, one hand grabbing the base of his cock so he can tease himself through your pussy lips.
“Can I convince you to let me eat you out first?”
“I need you,” you tell him, on the verge of crying if you don’t get your way.
“Another time, then.”
“Another time,” you agree with a laugh.
The tip of his cock teases by your clit and it makes your entire body jolt at the sensitivity.
“If it’s uh
 if it’s too much,” Mingyu licks his lips, tearing his gaze from your core so he can look you in the eyes, “if it’s too much just let me know and I’ll stop.”
“Gyu, please, I’ll be okay-” you try to assure him, although, you’re not sure if you’re even certain with yourself on this one. There’s a possibility you might not even be able to walk tomorrow, but that’s a risk you’re more than willing to take.
He brings the tip of his cock down to your wet hole, gently pushing into you. The head alone is enough to have you moaning, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and throwing your head back against the pillows.
“Fuck-”
“Yeah,” his breath is hot against your chest, “I know, I’m sorry.”
It’s so endearing that the man is sorry his cock is so big.
“Don’t be sorry,” you let out a laugh, “I’ll just have to get used to you.”
“I like the sound of that,” Mingyu admits, pushing another inch past your wet walls. “Fuck, you have no idea how good you feel.”
“Just wait till you’re fully inside of me,” you whisper, closing your eyes and doing your best to relax your body so you can take him.
Mingyu lets out a groan, hips gently thrusting so he can coat his cock in your wet juices. Each movement has him burying deeper and deeper, earning sounds of pleasure from your lips. 
Your nails claw at his shoulders, but it’s clear that Mingyu is too focused on your pussy to even care or notice. 
“Almost there,” he tells you, capturing his bottom lip between his teeth.
Nothing in the world has ever felt like Mingyu, and as his hips finally come flush to your own and he lets out a sigh of relief, you know that there’s no coming back from this. 
You both groan “Fuck” in unison, crashing your lips together a moment later as he begins to move. He starts off slow and gentle, his cock hitting spots so deep that you swear he’s rearranging your guts
You’ve spent years reading erotica, imagining what great sex would really look like, and now, you’re finally experiencing it for yourself.
You’ve never gone completely mind numb for someone before, but with Mingyu, you’re reduced to feral instinct. Sounds like the ones leaving your lips right now are not sounds that have ever come out of you before, and you swear you’ve never been this wet in your life.
Each thrust has Mingyu’s tip rubbing against a place that has you seeing stars, and as he picks up his pace, it’s the most you can do to keep kissing him even while wanting to scream with pleasure.
Your nails dig into his shoulders, and when Mingyu releases a grunt, bringing his mouth to your throat so he can gently bite at your skin, you realize he kind of likes the pain.
The thought has your pussy tingling with even more delight, and Mingyu groans loudly.
“So good,” he moans. “So fucking good.”
“Don’t stop, please, fuck- no one has ever fucked me like this before-”
From the way Mingyu fucks you even harder, it’s clear he also has a praise kink. It’s funny how often praise and pain go hand in hand in pleasure.
You’re thankful for all the books you’ve read about this sort of thing, because they allow you to read Mingyu in a way that you’ve never imagined being able to read someone. He wears his heart on his sleeve, and you adore it.
Mingyu lifts his thigh, angling himself better on the bed so each thrust can go as deep as possible. Your headboard is hitting the wall now, and part of you almost wishes Wonwoo was home so you could annoy him with the sound as much as he’s annoyed you with it.
But at the same time, you’re glad Wonwoo is probably at work. As interesting as being a vouyer is when you’re the one listening in, due to your interesting past with your Harley loving neighbour, you’re not sure how you’d feel about him being privy to this intimate moment you’re sharing with Mingyu.
It’s clear Mingyu is completely present with you. From the sounds escaping him, you know that he’s not thinking about anyone else listening in. His ability to be completely enraptured by you makes it easier for you to get lost in him again, and when you draw his lips to yours, your mind goes pleasantly blank once more.
You’re not sure how long he fucks you like this, but soon, his hand finds your clit again, and you realize he wants you to cum with him.
“Can you give me one more?” he asks, looking down at you with those eyes you’ve come to adore.
“Yeah,” you nod, already feeling the tightening of your abdominal muscles. You’re still sensitive from your first orgasm, and it’s way too easy for him to get you there again, especially with the way his cock drags against your inner walls and sets your entire body on fire.
“Fuck, you’re getting so tight, Angel, holy shit-” Mingyu groans deeply, pressing his forehead against your own. Each panting breath, each whimpered moan and grunt that escapes Mingyu has you closer and closer to the edge.
He should seriously consider getting a job reading erotica for money, like on the Quinn app or something, because fuck, no man has ever sounded this sexy before. 
“Come on,” he encourages you, “I won’t be able to last, fuck- you’re gonna cum with me, right?”
“Yeah-”
“You’re close?”
“Yes-” You dig your nails into his shoulders, closing your eyes and focusing on the way he’s circling your clit. 
“Please, please, please,” he practically begs, bringing his lips to your ear. “Be a good girl and cum for me again, come on, Angel, cum on my cock.”
You explode around him, crying out. Your legs tighten around his hips, and Mingyu’s entire body shudders as he cums with you. You can feel your core throbbing around him, milking him of his cum as he fills you to your absolute limit.
You’re both gasping, holding each other like life lines while orgasms ravage your bodies. It’s Heaven, but from the way your muscles are contracting, it’s also a little bit of Hell. Nothing has felt this good, but you know you’re going to be exhausted in the morning- fuck, you’re already exhausted.
Mingyu’s thrusts have faltered, but he tries to ride you through your highs. Soon, he’s half collapsing on top of you, your sweaty chests pressed together. Then he’s kissing you desperately, and it feels like you’re both pouring a thousand unsaid words into the meeting of your lips.
You make out for a short while, and then Mingyu pulls out of you, reaching for the kleenex box on your nightstand. “Here,” he offers, holding it between your thighs to stop any cum from dripping onto the bed.
“Thanks,” you let out a small laugh. “I’m gonna head to the bathroom.”
“Good idea.”
Your legs are wobbly when you stand up, and it reminds you of the first time you’d gotten off the back of his bike.
You don’t mind Mingyu making it hard for you to walk, in both ways.
Inside the bathroom, you do your best to use the toilet and clean up the cum. After double checking yourself in the mirror and deciding to brush your teeth for good measure, you head back to your bedroom
 which is where you find Mingyu flipping through the most recent book you’ve been reading.
Your heart lurches into your throat, body freezing in the doorway. 
“I didn’t know you read this sort of thing,” Mingyu muses, looking up at you.
“What?” you squeak.
“Erotica,” he responds casually. “This seems interesting though.”
You slowly approach the bed, joining Mingyu under the covers while he reaches to put your book back on your nightstand. 
“Uh
” you don’t even know what to say. “I didn’t mean for you to see that.”
Mingyu laughs, pulling you close to his chest. “Why not? It’s not like I’m judging you.”
“You’re not?”
“Nope. Why would I? I think I read somewhere that men like visual porn and women lean towards the written stuff, nothing to be ashamed of.”
He really is the perfect man.
“Plus, I keep seeing shit on tiktok about booktok girls needing their bikertok boy, I don’t mind filling that role for you.” Another nonchalant comment that makes your heart do somersaults. “Although
 aren’t all of you booktok girls into masked men and threesomes and shit?”
His words make you hide your face against his chest, shyness overcoming you. 
“Sorry, was that an overstep?” he laughs, rubbing your back with a large, warm hand.
“No, I’m just not used to talking about this, especially not with guys I just slept with.”
“The erotica you read is the fantasy you’re interested in, it would be a shame never to talk about it,” Mingyu muses. “That threesome between the demon knight and the guardian angel seemed pretty interesting.”
“God, you really weren’t supposed to read the book on my nightstand.” You can feel your skin getting hotter with embarrassment with each passing second.
“You’re adorable.” Mingyu cuddles you closer. “Look, I’m just going to put this out there, and if your answer is a no, then itïżœïżœïżœs a no
 If you ever did want to try a threesome, Wonwoo would be into it.”
Now your heart is really racing, and your entire body stiffens in Mingyu’s embrace.
“Shit, my bad for even suggesting it,” Mingyu apologizes immediately.
“It’s not that
” you take a deep breath. If you’re going to continue things with Mingyu, he needs to know about your past - however unimportant it is - with Wonwoo. “Look
 I uh
 I matched with Wonwoo on a dating app last summer, nothing came out of it, but, I don’t know, I still feel awkward around him.”
Mingyu is silent for a few seconds, and you’re too scared to look up at his face, too scared of the expression you might find there.
“That would actually explain a lot,” Mingyu says finally. 
“It would?”
“Yeah, when I first introduced you two, he was more of an asshole than usual. And that first time I offered you a ride on my bike, he just took off. I kind of chalked it up to him being socially awkward sometimes around cute girls, but, now things make a bit more sense.”
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier.”
“It’s all good,” Mingyu assures you, rubbing your back. “Honestly, I’m pretty tired. How do you feel about the two of us staying here tonight, cuddling till we fall asleep, and talking more about this in the morning?”
You let out a sigh of relief. “That actually sounds perfect.”
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Twelve - Wonwoo
As if listening to you and Mingyu fuck the first time wasn’t enough, Wonwoo had been woken up at three am, and then again at seven to the sound of your moans carrying through his walls.
His room is dark thanks to his black out curtains, but in the blackness of his room, Wonwoo finally snaps. He’d done his best to wear noise cancellers the first time, to put his head under his pillow the second, but now, Wonwoo has lost all of his resolve.
Your small whimpers are simply too hard to resist, and as Wonwoo’s hand slips down to his aching cock, he can’t help but wonder what would have happened if things had worked out with you all those months ago. It could be him that you’re under right now, not his best friend, and that’s a conflicting thought. 
Wonwoo lets out a quiet sigh as he begins to stroke his hard length. He closes his eyes, focusing on the muffled sounds of pleasure that make it through the walls.
When Mingyu had first mentioned that Wonwoo’s escapades had been keeping you up, he’d dismissed it, but now after being woken three times, he can see your annoyance. 
He’ll have to try to go easier on you. 
As Wonwoo works himself up to your moans, he wonders if you’ve ever been in this exact situation; touching yourself while he got off with someone else just a few feet through a wall.
The thought sends a shiver up Wonwoo’s spine and he shifts under his duvet, tossing the fabric off of himself, abdominal muscles clenching with delight.
From the sound of Mingyu’s thrusts and the headboard hitting the wall, Wonwoo’s pretty sure Mingyu is close already- fuck, he would be too if he had you to bury his morning wood into. And from the noises escaping you, Wonwoo knows you’re just as close.
He applies more pressure to his aching cock, speeding up his strokes- Wonwoo wants to cum with you and his roommate, although he’s not quite sure why. 
Sure, once you both cum, his entertainment is over, but there’s a need to be paired with you both, something that goes beyond a voyeuristic act like watching porn, which he could easily switch to when you’re finished if he wanted to prolong the experience.
A muffled “Fuck, I’m close” has Wonwoo’s entire body tensing, and as your moans crescendo, the tightly wound knot inside of him snaps. He lets out a gasp, pumping his cock while ropes of his own cum paint his chest. 
He wishes his hand was you, but the image of you instead of his hand is enough to make another wave of pleasure pass over him. He works himself through it to the point of overstimulation, finally stopping when the headboard sounds cease.
Wonwoo lays there for a moment, eyes closed, catching his breath.
When he finally turns his phone flashlight on and looks down at his chest, he realizes he’s cum more listening to you and Mingyu fuck than he’s probably ever cum inside of a girl.
It’s then that Wonwoo realizes how truly screwed he is. 
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Thirteen
Seungkwan had nearly spat out his drink when you’d revealed Mingyu’s offer to invite Wonwoo into your bed. Soonyoung’s jaw had dropped, and it’s stayed that way. Seokmin looks like he’s having a panic attack, his cheeks all flushed, his hands tugging at the neckline of his dress shirt.
“So what are you going to do?” Seungkwan asks finally, taking a sip of his Gin and Tonic with his wide eyes glued to you.
“I’m honestly not sure,” you admit, letting out a sigh.
“Bitch,” Seungkwan rolls his eyes, “don’t give us that. You read smutty threesome shit all the time, and here you are, being propositioned by your hot neighbour and his best friend, who both ride motorcycles, I might add- this is a fucking no brainer and we all know it.”
“You’ve been wanting a proper fuck session forever,” Soonyoung agrees.
“It’s actually like
 one of your biggest things,” Seokmin points out, nodding. 
“But don’t you think this would be messy?” you ask. “Like, if these were randoms I’d never see again, it would be one thing- but they live next to me, and I’m low key dating Mingyu. Wonwoo doesn’t seem like the polyamory type.”
“Babes,” Seungkwan reaches a hand across the table to squeeze your forearm, “This doesn’t have to be polyamory. Wonwoo can just be some dude that fucks you with his bestie sometimes. You can mostly focus on Mingyu, I mean, after all, we all know you and Wonwoo don’t even really like each other after the whole
 ghosting thing.” 
“Which is so valid,” Seokmin assures you, also reaching out to grab your hand. “Who suggests a group motorcycle trip as a first date, that was very stupid.”
“Plus, didn’t you mention hearing Wonwoo fuck some girl through your wall?” Soonyoung asks, playing with the straw in his bellini. “I bet you’re wondering why she was being so loud. I mean, obviously his dick game must be good.”
“I have been wondering,” you admit. “Mingyu is so soft with me, so good and gentle- Wonwoo seems like he might be the opposite.”
“And you’ll never really know until you give this a try.” Seungkwan pats your hand encouragingly. “I think you have your answer, babes. Go make those smutty dreams of yours come true, or you’ll regret it the rest of your life.” 
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Fourteen
Mingyu’s been coming over more and more often. Even though his place is just next door, he tends to have a preference for holding you until he passes out in your bed. You don’t mind, being in his arms helps you get the best rest you’ve had in ages, and you never feel closer to him than you do when you wake up next to him in the morning.
It’s a Sunday, and you’re laying in bed. Mingyu had gotten up, decided he’d wanted you for breakfast, fucked your brains out, and now, you’re stroking each others skin while you catch your breaths.
“Are you thinking about something?” Mingyu asks, and you realize he must have noted your silence.
You take a deep breath, looking up into his eyes. He’s done his best to foster an environment of safety- you know you can talk to him about anything, and now seems as good a time as any to broach a few subjects that have been weighing you down.
“What are we doing?” you ask.
“We’re cuddling?”
You let out a laugh. “No, I mean
 what are we doing? Like
 I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you, and from the way you spoke at the start of all of this, it sounded like you were looking for a relationship, but ever since you mentioned inviting Wonwoo into bed, I guess I’m just a little confused about
 the trajectory of this. Sharing the girl you want to date exclusively with your bestie just doesn’t seem like a usual start to a new relationship.” 
“Valid question,” he nods. “I can see where I caused some confusion
 I guess, I mean- It’s not that I want to date you exclusively, I already am dating you exclusively, and I have been since the start.”
While this is news to you, you suppose it’s not the most surprising thing. Mingyu has been spending so much time with you lately, he’d have to be Superman or the world’s more snakey person to be able to juggle anyone else.
“When it comes to the whole Wonwoo thing- If I’m being honest, we’ve been friends forever. We’ve had like
 three or four threesomes together? So I guess I feel comfortable inviting him because we have that foundation of trust there, and based on the stuff you read - correct me if I’m wrong - but I think a threesome is on your bucket list.”
Now this is some hot gossip. You’d never for a moment considered the idea that Wonwoo and Mingyu have shared girls together before- but now that the idea is out in the open, you feel stupid for it having never crossed your mind. 
“So there really wouldn’t be any jealousy or any problems if Wonwoo joined us?” you clarify.
“There never have been before. Wonwoo’s not the relationship type. If I honestly thought there would be a problem, I wouldn’t have brought it up,” Mingyu tells you. “Sounds like you’re open to it.”
“I am,” you admit. “Also
 I’m exclusively seeing you too, by the way.”
Mingyu laughs. “I know, Angel. Wonwoo is an exception, the only exception.”
“Agreed.” 
“So
” Mingyu pulls you tighter to his chest. “Are we gonna bring this up with him?”
“Do you want to ask him?”
“I think we should do it together.”
The idea of bringing this up with Wonwoo makes your heart race. “You think he’ll react okay?”
“Angel, he matched with you on Tinder before, and tried to take you out three times, even if you did ghost him, you’re way too sexy for him to ever say no to.”
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Fifteen
When you’d arrived at Mingyu’s place after dinner, he’d suggested a movie night. Wonwoo usually gets off work around one am, and with his Harley, Mingyu expected him to be back at one thirty at the latest. 
Around midnight, you’d fallen asleep, with Mingyu following close behind, and when the sound of the front door unlocking finally pulls you from your slumber, a quick check at the clock tells you it’s already past two.
Mingyu groans behind you, pulling you closer, pressing his lips to the back of your neck. 
Wonwoo walks into the den area in time to see the exchange, and he pauses by the open concept kitchen, staring at you in the dim darkness of the space. 
“What are you doing out here on the couch?” he asks.
“We were waiting for you,” you say softly, pushing at Mingyu’s hand in an effort to wake him up fully.
Wonwoo stays quiet, and after a moment, Mingyu finally groans and sits up, turning to look at his best friend. Mingyu rubs at his eyes, yawning. “We have something to talk to you about,” he mumbles.
“Let's hear it,” Wonwoo sighs, setting his helmet and gloves onto the kitchen counter before he goes to remove his leather jacket.
“You know what
 maybe it’s too late for this,” you suggest, turning to look at Mingyu.
“Don’t be shy,” he encourages you, pulling you closer and kissing your throat. 
You note the way your body reacts, head tilting to the side to give him better access. It’s clear that you’re not as afraid of being watched as you’d thought you might be, and when your gaze shifts to Wonwoo, you find him staring at the place where you and Mingyu’s bodies connect.
A muscle in his jaw feathers, and you see the way his fist clenches at his side, but he stays silent.
“Do you want me to do it?” Mingyu asks.
“Yes, please.”
Mingyu gives a reassuring kiss to your cheek. “I know you two have a past-” he begins.
“She told you about that, did she?” Wonwoo interrupts.
“Uh huh, she’s a good girl like that,” Mingyu holds you tighter. “Anyways, I know you two have a past, and I know you’re attracted to each other-”
“Mingyu.” There’s a warning tone in Wonwoo’s voice now, and it makes your skin tingle. 
“I’m too tired to do this right,” Mingyu sighs, “but listen, she wants to try a threesome, we’ve done threesomes, I figured I’d put it on the table, if you’re interested.”
Wonwoo stands in the kitchen for a moment, then he lets out a sigh, turning and placing both of his hands on the counter. He looks down at the ground, and you wonder what’s going through his head.
“Aren’t you two dating?” he asks finally.
You open your mouth to respond but decide to shut it, turning to Mingyu to allow him to answer. “Yeah, I mean, we’re exclusive.”
“How can you be exclusive if you’re inviting me into a fucking threesome?” Wonwoo snaps.
“Because you’re you,” Mingyu shrugs. “Why do you seem mad?”
Wonwoo lets out a deep sigh. “This isn’t the right way to start a relationship, Gyu.”
You find it comical that Wonwoo - of all people - is trying to school Mingyu on how to treat a girl. 
“I’m pretty confident in us,” Mingyu grins, pressing a kiss to your cheek. You kind of love how sure he is, and it makes your trust in the budding relationship feel even stronger. “Look, if you don’t want to-”
“I want to.” 
It feels like the air is knocked from your lungs. Yes, you’ve considered this for weeks, but part of you never really thought it would get this far, never thought Wonwoo would actually agree-
“I’ve been listening to you two fuck through a wall for weeks,” Wonwoo continues. “Of course I fucking want to.”
“So what’s the problem?” Mingyu asks, brows furrowing at why his friend still sounds so angry.
Wonwoo turns to look at you. “This is going to complicate things.”
“Only if you let it,” Mingyu argues. “Look, you’re both overthinkers, and I get that, but with me here, I’ll keep us all grounded, I promise.”
“It’s not that easy,” Wonwoo sighs.
“It can be, if you both let it be.” He sounds so sure, and you want to believe him on this-
“So is this just going to be a one time thing?” Wonwoo asks, and you note the way his gaze shifts from his roommate to you. Then you feel Mingyu’s eyes too.
“Uh
 I hadn’t thought that far,” you admit.
“We could always just go with the flow,” Mingyu suggests.
“You know I’m not that kind of guy,” Wonwoo retorts.
“Honestly, I know it was just a simple case of ghosting, but you two don’t seem to actually like each other that much,” Mingyu points out, “unless I’m misreading something. So how about we give it a shot, and go from there?”
Wonwoo looks to you, and after a moment to consider it, you nod, he mirrors the motion soon after.
“Fine. I’m in.”
“Can you try to sound more enthusiastic?” Mingyu teases. “This is my Angel I’m letting you get a taste of.”
“Don’t test your luck,” Wonwoo warns. “Are we doing this right now?”
“I’m already half hard just thinking about it,” Mingyu grins. “Are you up for this, Angel?”
Things are happening a little fast for you, but you worry that if you don’t bite the bullet and try this now, you might chicken out if you give yourself enough time to overthink and talk yourself out of it. 
“Let’s do it,” you respond. 
Wonwoo stares at you from the kitchen, and you wait to see who will move first. Finally, Wonwoo nods. “Okay, my room.”
He walks away without another word. Mingyu is quick to get up, reaching down to tug you to your feet. You’re a little shocked at how abrupt Wonwoo is being, and how quick Mingyu is to act on Wonwoo’s locational choice.
You’ve never seen the inside of Wonwoo’s room, and you find it even more minimally furnished than the rest of the apartment. With nothing but a bed, a dresser and a gaming station set up, Wonwoo clearly has very few loves in his life. There are no books, no clothes strewn about- it almost looks like a room straight from the Ikea Catalogue with the theme ‘my ocd teenage gamer’s sanctuary.’
The only thing of any true interest, is a tiled wall mount light piece, and from the way Wonwoo is standing near it and looking down at his phone, you’re pretty sure it’s bluetooth. As Mingyu leads you to go sit with him on the bed, the tiles begin to change colour, and you’re not even surprised when Wonwoo goes for a red hue that makes this entire situation feel correctly sinful.
Mingyu sits behind you, prompting you to settle on his lap. His hands find your thighs, stroking you through your sweatpants. You can tell he’s waiting on something, and when Wonwoo finally looks up at the two of you, setting his phone down, you realize just how much power you’re about to hand over to the man you’d ghosted all those months ago.
Wonwoo approaches you and Mingyu, coming to stand right in front of you. He meets your gaze, but he’s quiet. You hold your tongue, knowing that now is not the time to start being a brat.
“So,” Wonwoo says finally. “My guess is Mingyu’s been going easy on you since you started fucking.”
Mingyu lets out a laugh behind you, and you find yourself wanting to defend him. “I wouldn’t say he’s been going easy on me-”
“I’m going to make an assessment, and you’re going to tell me if I’m wrong,” Wonwoo states. “You look like the kind of girl who wants to be dominated. The shy ones can sometimes be the kinkiest girls you’ll ever meet, and something tells me that if you’re interested in a threesome - interested enough to let me be the one to come in here and fuck you - you’ve got some specific itches that need to be scratched. Mingyu’s a vanilla boy. He doesn’t even like to call sleeping with a girl fucking. I’m betting he gives you everything you want, never makes you work for it, or beg for it, or any of that shit. The guy wakes up three times a night to rail you for fuck’s sake. So I’m guessing, even though he probably meets most of your needs, there’s something you’re missing that Mingyu thinks I can provide.”
Mingyu’s mouth finds your throat, pressing soft kisses that wordlessly tell you he’s not about to answer this assessment, it’s fully on you.
“I
” you swallow thickly. “I guess, I mean, that sounds correct.”
“You’re happy with Mingyu.” It’s more of a statement than a question, but you find the need to answer it anyways, so you nod quickly. 
“Very happy.”
“But he doesn’t dominate you.”
You shake your head.
“And tonight, you want someone to tell you what to do.”
You nod.
“You want someone to make you scream the way I made that other girl scream, the girl that kept you up at night. You want what I was giving her.”
“God, yes,” you admit, letting out a shuddery breath. You can feel Mingyu smile against your throat, and he wraps his arms tighter around you, holding you close to his chest. You can feel his cock straining up against your ass, and it’s driving you wild already.
“What’s off the table?” Wonwoo asks. “Be thorough.”
“I think
 no anal. Hard pass on anal, at least, right now,” you start. “And
 please don’t be mean to me? Like
 don’t degrade me?”
“If you’re our good girl, there will be no reason to degrade you, will there?” Wonwoo says smoothly, reaching out to cup your jaw. His thumb brushes by your lips and you open your mouth for him, accepting the digit that presses flat to your tongue. “See, you’re just a good girl looking for direction, there won’t be a problem tonight.”
He removes his hand, and part of you mourns the loss. 
“Everything else is on the table?” he clarifies.
“Nothing gross.”
“Nothing gross,” Wonwoo repeats with a laugh. “I guess that’s all subjective, but I get what you mean.”
God, you wonder what dirty, nasty things this man has done in his lifetime. 
“Safeword?” Wonwoo asks next.
You take a deep breath, only needing a moment to consider one. “Harley.” 
Mingyu groans behind you, his hands teasing up your thighs, closer and closer to where you need him while he begins to suck on your sweet spot. You can tell from his reaction that the safe word pleased him, and you know that everyone is aware how close you are to letting the fun actually begin.
Wonwoo has done his due diligence, now, he just has to do you.
“Gyu, how about you get her warmed up?” Wonwoo suggests, and the man you’re sitting on wastes no time with the request. Mingyu immediately slips his hand under the waistband of your sweatpants, fingers finding your clit through your panties while you squirm on his lap.
“Fuck,” Mingyu groans, “she’s so wet already.”
“That’s no surprise,” Wonwoo says nonchalantly, pivoting and moving away.
You watch him go, curious as to what he’s up to. Mingyu, meanwhile, is focused on getting your attention. He pushes your panties to the side, stroking your pussy, teasing as if he’s about to dip his fingers into you, only to circle your clit again.
You snap way too easily, turning to press kisses along his jaw. You reach a hand up to cup his cheek, prompting him to meet your lips. All it takes is a little tongue action for Mingyu to also break, finally slipping a digit into your wet core.
You whimper at the feeling, grinding down on his hand. The wiggling of your hips adds friction to the front of Mingyu’s pants, and he releases his own groan of pleasure. 
He adds a second finger and you find yourself gasping. Your thighs spread to accommodate Mingyu. His slow stroking is driving you wild, and the ever constant pressure on your clit only intensifies the situation.
“Lay her down,” Wonwoo’s voice snaps you out of your Mingyu haze, and you break the kiss to blink up at Wonwoo.
You notice something in his hands, but before you can get a better look, Mingyu is pulling his hand from your core and standing up, taking you with him. 
He gently places you onto the bed, tearing off your pants. His fingers go to hook in your underwear, but one tutting sound from Wonwoo makes him stop in his tracks.
“Leave those on for now,” Wonwoo instructs. “You might be skipping things because you’re needy, but I remember your panty kink.”
Panty kink? Mingyu has a panty kink?
Fuck.
You wonder how much Wonwoo knows about Mingyu’s sexual preferences, things that you haven’t even learned yet.
No matter how worried you were about this before you agreed to a threesome, it’s becoming more and more clear that Wonwoo might carry the keys to unlocking Mingyu’s full potential in bed- now, you’re worried what that means for the fully monogamous aspect of your relationship.
“Take off your shirt and bra for us,” Wonwoo prompts next. “I want to see you.”
His voice had softened at the end of the request, and the fact that Wonwoo has a good mix between commanding, and a tone that’s almost on the pleading side, has you immediately making good on what he’s just asked of you.
You slip your shirt off, tossing it onto the floor. Arching your back, you get at the clasp of your bra, and soon, it joins the discarded fabric next to the bed.
Mingyu gets onto the mattress between your thighs, his hands stroking up your legs, which spread for him again.
“Here,” Wonwoo tosses the thing he’d been holding onto your chest.
When you pick it up, you realize it’s a blindfold.
Wonwoo meets your questioning gaze. “Put that on. You trust us, right?” 
You swallow thickly, then, you slip on the blindfold, obscuring your vision completely.
“That’s our good girl,” Wonwoo muses, and his satisfaction has your core throbbing. He’s being a lot nicer than you’d hoped he would be- part of you had wondered if this would a rage fueled fuck, revenge for the ghosting. But the way Wonwoo’s treating you- it’s clear he has no animosity toward you for your past, regardless of the cold way he’s been acting toward you up until tonight.
Even with the blindfold, it’s clear who’s still rubbing your legs. And when Mingyu shifts his weight, bending down to press kisses along your inner thighs, you know it’s still him.
Although there aren’t any surprises happening in terms of who is touching you, with your vision cut off, every brush of Mingyu against your skin feels even more intense. Without the pressure of keeping your eyes open, or following the action with your gaze, you can simply lay back and enjoy what’s happening.
Mingyu’s mouth reaches your core, and his breath through the fabric makes you twitch.
When his tongue makes contact with your wet panties, you both let out groans. The world seems suspended in anticipated pleasure, if even just for a moment, before Mingyu practically dives in.
His tongue pushes at your panties, and the teasing aspect of his muscle prodding at your core has your stomach already twisting into knots. It’s like he’s trying to devour your underwear, trying to push his tongue through so he can get at you-
You’d never imagined keeping your pussy covered with a thin piece of fabric would reveal to you how desperate Mingyu is to properly be eating you.
Your hands reach down, tangling in Mingyu’s hair, and you begin to grind against his face, using his nose to add pressure to your clit.
Something brushes by your nipple, and you practically jump at the contact. Then, the soft bud is pinched between two fingers. It’s not a hard pinch, not enough to hurt, but enough to have your pussy throbbing even more from the idea of pain. 
You also know that it’s Wonwoo who has finally decided to touch you, and you’re kind of scared of the effect that’s having.
Mingyu doesn’t even notice his friend beginning to play with your tits, he’s much too distracted by licking your core through your panties. You’d bet that if you took your blind fold off right now, you’d find his own eyes closed, his mind completely consumed by the act of being close to your pussy without really being able to get at it.
“Does he feel good?” Wonwoo asks.
“Uh huh,” you nod, tightening your grip in Mingyu’s hair so you can grind harder against his mouth.
“He’s already nearly breaking,” Wonwoo muses, “how far along are you?”
“I-” You swallow thickly. “I don’t know.”
“I want you to enjoy the teasing, want you to be brought to the edge like this, and when you’re finally about to snap, I’ll let him pull your panties to the side. You can ride his face while you cum for us.”
Your muscles clench at his words, and you nod quickly. “Okay.”
“Where are your manners?” He pinches your nipple even more roughly, and you let out a delighted squeal.
“Okay, yes, thank you, thank you, Wonwoo,” you correct yourself.
“Good girl.” The pinching subsides, but you almost miss the pain. “You look good like this.”
“Thank you!” you blurt out, not wanting to fumble your manners so early just because he’s being sweet to you.
Wonwoo’s fingers leave your breast, and your focus shifts to Mingyu again. He’s begun rubbing his nose against your clit, and you’d bet that Wonwoo’s words about getting you to the edge have inspired the motion.
Mingyu knows that clit stimulus will get you there faster than the teasing of his tongue along your panties, and you give yourself to the pleasure he’s providing.
Wet lips wrap around your nipple and your body jolts. One your hands immediately flies to the back of Wonwoo’s head, threading through his soft curls while he sucks on you. He releases a groan of satisfaction. You respond with a whimper of your own, pushing your chest up toward his mouth.
Nothing has ever felt like this.
Having two sexy men worship you is making your body short circuit faster than it ever has before.
You can feel your orgasm rising in your stomach, and before you even know it, you’re letting out a gasp. “Fuck, I’m close- shit, thank you, fuck, I’m gonna-”
You can’t even finish your sentence, Mingyu tugs your panties to the side, pushing two digits into your hole while his lips find your clit, sucking the sensitive bud while he groans like a starved man.
Wonwoo’s teeth simultaneously graze your nipple, and the combination of stimuli is enough to throw you over the edge.
Your pussy clamps down on Mingyu’s fingers, waves of pleasure exploding out from your core. The loudest moan you’ve ever released sings out of you, and your grip tightens in both of their curls. You’re used to having one anchor, Mingyu, who you hold onto to keep you from floating too high to cloud nine, but now, even with two anchors, you still find yourself drifting away into a state of bliss you’ve never even dreamed of.
Wonwoo’s free hand finds your neglected breast, and a pinch at your nipple has even more electric energy surging through you, your back arching at how intense this all is.
Mingyu hasn’t stopped between your thighs, his fingers are unrelenting inside of your throbbing core, his tongue flicking your clit better than any vibrator or toy ever has.
You cum, and cum, and cum-
Mingyu releases a sinful groan, and you can feel something splash your inner thighs. Mingyu pulls away from your clit, licking up the liquid-
Wonwoo’s mouth leaves your breasts, and you can feel his gaze slipping between your legs.
“Fuck, I didn’t know you could squirt, baby,” he muses, massaging your breast in a way that almost feels loving.
“I didn’t-” you struggle to speak amidst your moans, “I can’t-
“No one’s ever made you squirt before?” Wonwoo finishes your sentence for you.
“No, sir, I mean- yes, sir-”
You hear Wonwoo let out a chuckle, and he pinches your nipple, making you cry out even more. “Sir, huh? Looks like our good girl has really learned her manners, Gyu.”
You’re not sure where the title had come from, but calling Wonwoo ‘sir’ had just felt right, it still feels right, as you writhe against his bed sheets.
“Okay, I think that’s enough,” Wonwoo sighs. Fingers brush by your cheek, and the sudden touch makes you flinch. “She’s crying, Gyu.”
Mingyu groans deeply, his fingers coming to a stop in your pussy. When he removes them, and both men pull away, you can finally take a deep breath after the intensity of your orgasm. Your entire body shudders as you try to steady yourself after what they’ve just given you.
In the periphery, you can hear a wet sucking sound, and you’d bet your life that Mingyu is licking his fingers clean.
“Squirting all over him like that got your boyfriend hard as fuck, baby, I think I’ll be nice and let him fuck you now.”
God, there’s so much you want to think about with that sentence- specifically the way Wonwoo just referred to Mingyu as your boyfriend, a term that you haven’t yet used- but you’re also so needy for Mingyu’s cock now that you can’t sit and ponder the relationship development. 
“Yes, please, Mingyu, fuck, need your cock-” you whine, reaching down to tug your panties off-
Another set of hands grabs the fabric, and before you can fumble to get your underwear down your legs, Mingyu simply tears them in two to get at you.
His cockhead is rubbing against your soaked folds a moment later, and you let out a whimper of desperation. 
“Fuck, Angel, you’re doing so good for us,” Mingyu groans, slipping the head into you.
“Gyu-” you whimper, grabbing at the bed sheets, your eyes rolling into the back of your head from the stretch of his girthy tip.
“You’re so fucking wet,” he tells you, one hand flattening on your abdomen to keep you still. “I could slide all the way in like this-”
“Do it,” Wonwoo says simply. “Bet she’d fucking love that.”
“I would,” you agree, whimpering at the idea of him filling you up with one powerful thrust. “Please, split me open-”
The words no sooner leave your mouth than Mingyu is doing just as you’d asked. In one motion, he sinks the entirety of his cock into your wet, ready hole. 
His hips hit flush to your own, and you release something between a cry and a scream. Your inner walls struggle desperately to accommodate the large intrusion that your body is still not used to even after fucking Mingyu countless times.
Before Mingyu, ‘Like a Virgin’ had just been a Madonna song, now, it’s something you understand completely.
Mingyu’s mouth finds your neck as he leans his entire, large, muscled body over your own. His lips are hot as they suckle on your sweet spot, and you grab at his strong shoulders, wrapping your legs around his hips.
He starts slow with his motions, only pulling out slightly. With each small rut, his cock sinks so deep that it hits a spot that makes you go mind numb.
You’re a gasping, wriggling mess for Mingyu, and from the sounds leaving his own lips, you know he loves it.
His pace starts to increase. You can feel your pussy tingling with each thrust, the vein along the underside of his cock stimulating your walls perfectly.
Mingyu draws your lips to his own, and you find yourself in a desperate clash of tongues. 
“How cute,” Wonwoo’s voice draws you back to reality. “For the record, baby, I’ve never seen Mingyu this into someone.”
God, why is he being so nice to you?
Why does the thought that you make Mingyu come undone unlike anyone else have your pussy throbbing?
Your hand moves before your mind even registers what you’re doing. It flails out toward Wonwoo’s voice, and you’re pretty sure you make contact with his thigh.
“What are you doing?” Wonwoo asks, tone shifting.
You break the kiss with Mingyu, and his lips find your throat while you address his friend. “Wanna touch.”
Wonwoo is silent, and moments feel like minutes. Then, you hear a belt buckle, and a zipper being pulled down.
“You just wanna touch?” Wonwoo prompts. 
Before you can even respond, Mingyu is nipping at your ear. He’s breathing heavily, fucking you faster. “Do you wanna suck him off, Angel? I won’t be mad if you do.”
This is a threesome, it wouldn’t be fair if Wonwoo didn’t get a bit of you too

“Yes.”
“Yes, what?” Wonwoo prompts.
“Yes, I wanna suck you off,” you clarify, doing your best to make your voice sound confident.
Mingyu groans, and then he pulls off of you. You whine at the loss of him, but he flips you onto all fours, pulling your ass into the air so he can push his cock into you again. You do your best to steady yourself on your hands, and the bed dips in front of you, signaling Wonwoo’s arrival.
“Here,” Wonwoo’s voice is soft, as soft as his touch when he pulls the blindfold off of you. “Wanna see that pretty face when you choke around my cock.”
In the red light from the tiled wall mount, Wonwoo looks insane. Yeah, a little insane in the crazy way, but insanely sexy too.
He’s taken his shirt off, and you’re shocked to find washboard abs that make you drool immediately. His curls are all flouncy and illuminated by the red, like a halo, or even devil horns. His jeans are undone, but he doesn’t have his cock out yet, which you kind of appreciate.
Although you can see his length straining against the black denim, he didn’t immediately stick his dick down your throat, he’s giving you time to adjust to the new position.
You blink up at him, and Wonwoo smiles, cupping your cheek. “You’re doing so good, baby.”
“So good,” Mingyu echoes, digging his fingers into your hips as he begins to fuck you like a mad man.
“Sir,” you breathe.
“Yes, baby?”
“Can I suck you off now?”
Wonwoo’s grin widens. “Go for it.”
You realize he’s not going to help you take his cock out, not yet at least. It’s difficult to hold yourself up with one hand while Mingyu fucks you, your free one reaching for his jeans. You hook your fingers in the fabric, trying to tug them down.
Part of you thinks Wonwoo likes watching you struggle. He’s said he’d be nice, wouldn’t degrade you, and he’s not, but this feels like it’s bordering on humiliation. 
Here you are, getting fucked stupid, holding yourself up on one shaky hand while the other tugs desperately at his pants, trying to free his cock so you can have it sink down your throat-
“You’re cute,” Wonwoo muses, finally giving in.
He pushes his pants down, his cock springing up against his abdomen.
He’s long. Maybe not as long as Mingyu, and not as thick either, but that just means you might actually be able to take him fully into your mouth, unlike your boyfriend’s monster cock that you can’t even fully suck halfway.
Even though Wonwoo isn’t as big as Mingyu, he’s confident in himself, and that makes things all the more sexy.
He grabs the base of his length, holding the tip out for you.
Meeting his eyes, you open your mouth, sticking out your tongue.
Wonwoo taps himself along the wet muscle, then he teases the tip just past your lips- you go to wrap your mouth around him, only for him to pull back with a laugh. “Eager, are you?”
You nod, “uh huh.”
He doesn’t even tut at you for your lack of manners, after all, you’re still holding your mouth open for him, unwilling to close it if even for a few moments to say a ‘yes, sir.’
“I guess I can give it to you,” Wonwoo sighs. Although he’s trying to sound unbothered, you can tell from his leaky red tip that he’s just as turned on by this as you are. You can see through Wonwoo now, and you wonder how that’s going to impact your opinion of him.
This man who likes to seem hard and domineering, who likes to appear nonchalant- you wonder what kind of thoughts are swimming in that pretty head of is.
Wonwoo slips his cock into your mouth, and you immediately begin to suck it, twirling your tongue along the tip. He pushes in another inch, testing your abilities. His eyes are fixed on yours, and you stare up at him, wanting to please.
Mingyu fucks you harder, prompting you forward onto Wonwoo’s cock. You take more and more of him, doing your best to relax and focus on the pleasure Mingyu is giving you, rather than the uncomfortable feeling of a heavy dick on your tongue.
You enjoy giving oral, but you’ve always found it easier to have some other stimulus to anchor yourself- Mingyu’s cock splitting you open is just the right amount of distraction. When Wonwoo hits the back of your throat, you hardly choke, too enraptured by Mingyu behind you to carefully about your gag reflex.
“Fuck, that’s good,” Wonwoo tells you, having watched for your limits and reactions.
He begins to thrust now, matching Mingyu’s motions. It’s a push pull, and you kind of love being used like this, having two cock filling you up. They’re almost synchronized, and it turns you on that they’ve done this before, that they’re familiar with each other.
You couldn’t imagine a better pair to lose your threesome virginity to.
Wonwoo’s hand grabs your hair, and you watch as he throws his head bad, letting out a groan.
Fuck, he’s so sexy- they both are. Mingyu’s grip on your hips is even tighter, and you know what that means.
“I’m close,” your boyfriend announces.
“Well I just started,” Wonwoo retorts. “Hold it.”
You’re shocked that Mingyu doesn’t even fight back, his thrusts simply slow down a notch. Wonwoo, meanwhile, speeds up, and you do your best to hollow your cheeks around his cock, sucking on him like you’ve never sucked on anyone before.
“You’re good with your mouth, baby,” Wonwoo praises you.
“She’s so good,” Mingyu agrees, reaching a hand around your body so he can rub your clit.
You jolt at the contact, pussy clenching desperately around Mingyu’s cock.
“Fuck, Woo, we’re both close-” Mingyu groans, resting his forehead against your shoulder, his breath hot across your skin.  
“I guess I can make this quick,” Wonwoo grunts, hips shuddering.
Mingyu draws fluid, lazy circles on your clit, speckling your shoulders with kisses while he ruts slowly into your core. You suck on Wonwoo diligently, like it’s your job- after all, it is your job to make him cum in order for you and Mingyu to get there too.
The pressure in your abdomen is getting tighter and tighter, you’re not sure how much longer you can hold off, especially with the sounds Mingyu’s making-
“You two are so needy,” Wonwoo muses, letting out a small chuckle. “Fuck.” 
“You gotta let her cum,” Mingyu practically begs. “She’s squeezing me like a fucking vice, dude- this is torture.”
Wonwoo’s hips jolt at Mingyu’s words, the tip of his cock hitting the back of your throat. You feel your muscles constrict around both of them, and they both groan in response.
“You’re too good at this,” Wonwoo tells you. “When I cum, you both get to cum.”
It’s not an outward admittance that he’s close, but you can tell he is. His stomach muscles are clenching with effort as he uses your face, and the small groans of pleasure leaving him are higher in number now.
He fucks your face even faster, and Mingyu takes this as a cue to begin fucking you properly again. “Can you rub your clit, Angel?” he asks. “I need to grab your hips.”
You moan a sound of affirmation around Wonwoo, holding yourself up on one wobbly hand while the other slips between your legs.
“That’s it,” Mingyu groans, straightening behind you and taking hold of your hips with both hands. His pace matches Wonwoo’s now, and you can feel your orgasm so close-
You can almost taste it.
In fact, you can taste Wonwoo’s, a strangled gasp escaping him as he cums down your throat suddenly.
“Our turn, Angel,” Mingyu moans, pace quickening to a speed that would almost be painful if it wasn’t so pleasurable. Your fingers are rough on your own clit, and you do your best to swallow every drop of Wonwoo’s spend.
When he pulls out of your mouth, you breathe in a strangled gasp- only for moans of pleasure to escape you uncensored.
“Fuck, that’s it, Angel, almost there, almost there-” Mingyu groans. “Fuck, cum for me, cum for us- fuck, cum on my cock-”
His words throw you over the edge. You lean forward, resting your cheek against Wonwoo’s thigh while your orgasm overtakes you. Waves of pleasure surge through your body, making you shake- Mingyu’s hands hold your hips steady, keeping you where he wants you while he fucks you through your high, coating your insides with his thick cum.
You’re both moaning messes, completely given over to the ecstasy that you find in each other.
Your hand falls from between your legs, and soon, Mingyu’s motions stop. He keeps himself buried inside of you, trying to catch his breath.
“I’ll get some tissue,” Wonwoo says. He pulls away from you, and you collapse face first onto the bed, shuddering from the aftershocks of your high.
Mingyu’s hands begin to stoke your body, a silent assurance that you did well for them.
Wonwoo comes back with tissues, and Mingyu pulls out. You bring the kleenex to your dripping hole, careful not to get any cum onto Wonwoo’s bed-
Which is when you remember you squirted all over the comforter already.
You lay on your back, giggling to yourself.
“What’s so funny?” Wonwoo asks. Fingers go to pinch your nipple and you flinch, rolling away from him.
“I got squirt all over your bed,” you tell him.
“Naughty girl,” he says, but there’s an inkling of pride in his tone.
“It’s okay,” Mingyu says, reaching to pull you off the bed. “I’m going to go clean her up, you can throw your stuff in the laundry, and we can stay in my room tonight.”
You’re not sure why the idea of sleeping next to Wonwoo feels more intimate than the fact that he just came down your throat, but ten minutes later, when you’re snuggling between the two men, you find yourself almost unsure of how to act.
Mingyu’s already passed out, soft snores filling the room, and it’s Wonwoo who notices your unease as you shift under the sheets.
“Relax,” he tells you, his hands drawing you to his chest. “You’re safe with us.”
For some reason, his words actually calm you down, and after a few more deep breaths, you pass out on the chest of the man you’d ghosted over half a year ago.
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Epilogue
It’s been two months since you and Mingyu invited Wonwoo into your bed. Two months of great sex, but it’s even deeper than that.
Mingyu is outwardly your boyfriend, and he loves showing his claim over you every chance he gets, but Wonwoo is still on the fence about where he fits in your relationship. 
You’re at the bar where Wonwoo works, it’s a place you’ve been becoming more of a regular at. Mingyu is out with Cheol, but he’ll be meeting you shortly. Right now, all there is to do is wait and try not to flirt with Wonwoo too hard while he mixes drinks. 
Wonwoo is chatting with another regular, an old guy who keeps looking over at you. Finally, the man asks, “How do you two know each other?”
You and Wonwoo exchange a look. You wait for him to define the relationship, after all, out of everyone in your odd little throuple, Wonwoo’s the one who likes to go slowest when it comes to relationship milestones.
After a moment of consideration, Wonwoo responds, “She’s a friend. Dating my roommate.”
“Ah, okay,” the man nods.
It hurts for Wonwoo to not claim you the way you wish he would, but at the same time, you understand his hesitancy. 
When you’d first started fucking Wonwoo, you’d thought he was a doberman to Mingyu’s golden retriever, but now, you think he’s more of a black cat. If you move too fast or too sudden, you’re afraid of scaring him off, and that’s the last thing you’d want to do.
With a sigh, you lift your drink to your lips. You suppose having one boyfriend who claims you with all of his heart makes up for having another who is still unsure about what to call you.
But it doesn’t mean things hurt any less. 
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☀ mlist + an. thank you for reading! I'm happy I was able to get this fic out in time for spring :) when I tell you this shit was five months in the making-
🍭 support me by. sending a tip here or here - or become a patron to access monthly bonus content and extensions for fics like this one :) find the Patreon teaser below! 
🔼 preview.  Mingyu gives you all the love you’ve ever dreamed of from your romance novels. And Wonwoo gives you all the kinky sex you’ve fantasized about from the erotica you read. It’s the best of both worlds, and as Wonwoo sinks his cock into your wet pussy, you begin to suck on Mingyu.
cw/ tw. Exhibitionism, unprotected sex, sex in an alley, sex over a Harley motorcycle, eiffle tower/ spit roasting, quickie, blow job, deep throating, dirty talk, praise, cum/filling kink, inklings of humiliation, Wonwoo is a little rough,  etc
   I petnames. (hers) baby.  
đŸ‘č rating. 18+ explicit I wc. 2.7k I teaser wc. 220
🌙 staring. Wonwoo & Mingyu x afab!reader
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bonus
“I’m just gonna head outside with Cheol for a quick vape break,” Mingyu tells you, giving you a kiss on the cheek before he exits the bar with his buddy.
You turn to Wonwoo, who is busy mixing some elaborate drink for a group of cougars a few seats down. It’s a decent night here at his workplace, it’s summer now, so most evenings are good for him.
“Is this seat taken?” You turn to see the regular from a few months ago standing there, and you’re quick to offer him the chair, after all, you and Mingyu will be leaving soon anyways. “Don’t I know you from somewhere?” the man asks.
You exchange a look with Wonwoo. “Yeah, I uh
 I met you a few months ago,” you try to explain, pointing at your bartender. “I’m this guy’s friend.”
“Right, dating his roommate, now I remember,” the man nods.
Wonwoo has stopped what he’s doing, and he’s staring at you.
There’s a hint of danger in his eyes, and you’re not quite sure why. Then he sets down his drink, coming around the bar, and grabbing your arm. “Come outside,” he instructs. 
“What? Now?” you ask in shock, looking around at the bartop that's full of people who need drinks. “You’re working!”
“I don’t care. Come.”
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5K notes · View notes
hexados-on-a-string · 5 months ago
Text
good evening i totally didnt disappear for months haha idk what ur talking about
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jiminrings · 29 days ago
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mature
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pairing: jungkook x reader
wordcount: 8k
glimpse: the good thing about professing your feelings to jungkook is that it'd be over with, whether or not he likes you back — the bad thing is that he rejects you, even if you haven't confessed.
alternatively, crushing on jungkook who's in your friend group is, has, and will never be a good idea.
[ push n pull fic YIPPPEEEEE, fluff, angst, So Much Yearning, friends to lovers trope, jealousy, dunking on a stewpid jk (as one does), arguments that kinda hit home, redemption!! ]
notes: WE R SO BACK!!!! thank u for waiting đŸ«‚đŸ€
as always, lmk what you think <3 send in feedback n love to my askbox anytime!!
You will never tell Jungkook how desperately you want to be loved.
In your defense (much to Jungkook’s offence), you want to be loved as desperately as he acts on an everyday basis. He’s not pathetic in the sense that he’s hopeless, but rather pathetic in the light that you want the entirety of him (stubbornness and occasional dimness included) to rub off on you.
You want to be loved pathetically in the same way that Jungkook never computes his expenses when it comes to self-indulgence yet always calculates when it comes to actual requirements. You want to be loved as wholly by the guy who can get by one DIY dorm dinner at a time by asking for scraps from the whole floor with a grin and his hands cupped in begging.
Jungkook’s one of your friends, if not the best you’ve ever had, and it’s a miracle that you haven’t jumped at each and every available chance to confess your growing feelings for him.
You bit your tongue that one time he bought you "one of those silly blind boxes you like" on a whim from a bookstore he only went inside to in the first place because he was dying outside in the heat, only to open it for you with your eyes closed and earn you an extra rare figure.
You had to physically restrain yourself (read: clasp your hands together in front of you) when Jungkook made you swap your counterfeit, barely-holding-on kitten heels for his trustworthy slides on the way home because your research presentation prior had you pacing nervously.
Every time that he gives you your tax of whatever he ordered (which always ends up being the best variant that your friend group could possibly order for a meal or a sweet treat), you have to etch into your head clearly, with ballpoint pen, that you will never tell Jungkook how desperately you want him to love you.
Every time that he gives you a one-on-one friend outing, just as he does with everyone else from your circle of ten people and counting (you lost count because you figure that all of you are about to outgrow the long table in the library that nobody else could fill), you convince yourself to never tell him how much you want it to be just you.
You figure that you’ll tell Jungkook that you do hold a candle for him, despite not detailing the extent, in this lifetime— maybe even the next time you get a moment alone with him, but you figure you won’t do it now; now, when he’s berating you for just a tiny sacrifice you made that’s minuscule for everything he does for you and everyone else.
“You’re impossible!” he huffs, his annoyance for you being loud enough to stop his faux display of studying and gather attention from everyone else in the library who actually is. Jungkook holds up his phone for you to read, brows scrunched at your look of amusement. “Jimin told me you were lactose intolerant!”
You can’t figure how and why Jungkook and Jimin’s conversation even flitted towards you when you recall clearly that the lactose-filled meal in question was from two weeks ago. You don’t question it because you already know that even giving it a second thought would already be too pompous of you, and you don’t question either why Jungkook looks too devastated at the realization.
“I just tolerated it,” you snort, burying your nose back into your notes, missing the flash of regret in Jungkook’s features.
He doesn’t know whether he’d feel more sorry over the fact that he didn’t know you were lactose intolerant, or that you didn’t speak up at all to preserve his excitement over eating at the restaurant he wanted to try out.
“But why would you?” he sulks, completely foregoing the textbook he has opened on the same page for the last hour.
You know exactly why you did, but you’d rather not tell Jungkook now. 
You’ll tell him some other time, that much you’re sure of, but not now — not now when he’s too devastated over your tummy issues, and not now when he’s just one revelation away from chewing you out over something he has to learn from someone else.
“Your broke ass bought it so I had to,” you murmur, rolling your eyes as you rest your chin on the palm of your hand.
“Foul,” Jungkook immediately chuckles, shaking his head at your retort even if he knows you’re just kidding around (he knows you won’t hurt him like that that), finally opening his laptop.
Jungkook, your friend, finally types on his laptop, yet it’s not for the contribution that he badly needs to put in for a group project.
Instead, he opens up the Google Doc and writes in a bullet point underneath your name, the words do not give cheese acquainted with three exclamation points — along with your name, is the names of your mutual friends and Jungkook’s observations that would come in handy for an outing, a gift, or both.
Jungkook’s that good of a friend, and that’s why you’ll never tell him how desperately you want to be loved by him.
( ♡ ) 
Getting gifts for someone who has a credit card and has no inhibitions when it comes to buying whatever they want is a difficult task.
Getting Jungkook for Secret Santa this year is even harder than the last, and that was when Jin snuck five strips of his name and left more than five of you (you don’t even know how that happened) without gifts, all while he was laughing to himself after he successfully gaslit everyone into thinking that they were all drunk and made the mistake themselves.
You don’t know what to give Jungkook that he doesn’t already have. He doesn’t have a girlfriend the last time you checked and while you can’t exactly wrap yourself in ugly, recycled kraft paper (as opposed to Jimin’s dumb, all-knowing-about-your-hidden-feelings suggestion), you’d rather not drive Jungkook away, even if you don’t know either how to drive him in.
You don’t have the slightest clue to what his ‘surprise me ;)’ scribble underneath his name means and it makes you feel guilty, far more than he ever could have after Jimin’s revelation of your dietary restrictions. 
It’s not the dilemma of who would sit next to who in the large albeit crowded dining table in the cabin that you rented out, nor is it the cooking and wrapping duties that each of you are tasked with that stresses you out this holiday season.
You wish so badly that the largest champagne problem you have at the moment was wondering if your Christmas gift for your nitpicky mom and nonchalant dad back at home arrived in time. You pray that your biggest hurdle is either convincing Namjoon that his room is just cold and not haunted, or breaking off a fight between Eunwoo and Soomin because they keep fighting over whose overpriced film camera will be used for the picture by the tree, or even talking Mingyu down from smacking Jin in his sleep.
The largest champagne problem that you have, even if it’s actually between life and living said life in peace without minding your inevitable heartbreak, is worrying about Jungkook’s gift.
You hold your breath as soon as Hoseok gathers everyone into the living room, your nerves probably getting the best of you because you hear Jungkook hollering to whoever’s closest to the thermostat to adjust it because your teeth kept chattering.
You have nothing to be nervous about, you convince yourself as Jungkook steps up into the middle and awaits with wide arms, your best friend being another victim of assuming that the comically large wrapped present is his (it’s not).
Jungkook doesn’t have any expectations for you to meet, you convince yourself as he becomes even more hyper when he learns that it’s you, so much so that he takes a lap around the backyard with his hands clapping furiously.
You can’t love Jungkook any more than you do now, you realize as you see Jungkook throw his head back in glee when he opens up your gift.
It’s only a Himalayan salt lamp. It’s only a lamp that you didn’t buy for so much. It’s only a thing that Jungkook said to you in passing one time, yet he’s beyond grateful — enough for him to carry you in his arms and take another lap around the backyard.
“God, you love me soooo bad,” he lulls, teasing you mercilessly as he unceremoniously drops you so he could adore the lamp up close. “I always wanted to lick one!”
“You’re so stupid,” you mutter, rolling your eyes at his excitement over something so simple; something so insignificant in the world of thoughtful, expensive gifts.
You affectionately think that Jungkook’s stupid, yet you can’t tear your eyes away from him.
“I didn’t hear a no,” Jungkook hums with his tongue out, eyes wide and flickering between you and the lamp. “Should I do it? Should I? I’m doing-
!”
You put a spoonful of cake into his mouth instead, the whine that escapes his throat still sounding like gratefulness to your ears.
Tonight’s not the night wherein you tell Jungkook how badly you want to be loved by him — not when he’s so preoccupied with his new salt lamp that he keeps daring people to take a lick of, not when he’s the one who’s being convinced that there’s a ghost in Namjoon's room and being bullied into sleeping in.
Not when Jungkook’s being the perfect, lovable friend that he is during the holidays and every other day.
( ♡ ) 
You’re well-aware that Jungkook’s a catch.
You know that he’s a catch and he’ll never live it down, and neither can you.
You’re very painfully aware that Jungkook’s a catch because you’re reminded of it every single day whenever you’re with your friends. You know that atleast two of them were integrated into the group in the first place because they liked Jungkook, and that doesn’t really bother you (more than it should, atleast) anymore. 
Sora’s crush formed out of boredom on Jungkook disappeared as soon as she got a boyfriend, but you understand why her gaze lingered on him in the first place.
Eunji’s crush on Jungkook already dissipated the moment she learned about his GPA, but you get why she had been attracted to his charm anyway.
You know that he’s a catch and that he’s not solely yours either, and the latter makes you humble.
“There’s flowers on your desk again,” you point out, the arrangement irking you for more reasons than one. “Why do you have to be so popular and handsome.. and lovable,” you mumble, the tail end of your mini rant barely being heard by Jungkook because he's too busy admiring his gift.
“What’s that now?” Jin piped up, eyebrows furrowed upon picking up your angry muttering. He's beyond confused, maybe just as much as you are, when you just snarl at him for his unintentional use of supersonic hearing.
“And why do I have to sit next to you even if I have allergies,” you redirect your attention to Jungkook who has to sweep the flowers to a beaten-up paper bag for safekeeping, the item in his backpack being the most used object for all of the admiration towards him.
“Because you’re the best-est friend ever,” he rolls his eyes, the faux pout on his lips surprisingly softening you instead of the opposite. “And maybe I’m the worst-est one to keep putting you through this.”
“You sound so stupid,” you reply automatically, crossing your arms and keeping them there. “But you’re right,” you exhale through your nose, conceding your defeat over willingly letting him put you through this, carrying the blame by yourself.
Jungkook doesn’t only act like this with you anyway. There’s no special treatment, there’s no false hopes being promised — it’s just you genuinely happening to fall for him.
“Come on, just tolerate it! Pinch your nose or something!”
“Why should I? Find another seatmate,” you sulk, making a point to angle your back away from him and towards Jin who’s at your right, doing his best at holding in a laugh over how ridiculous the both of you look.
“Obviously you’re the one with the latest phone so you have to take pictures of me with the flowers!” Jungkook whines, punctuating his sentence with a hand on his hip. He’s sulking because you’re sulking, and you’ve never hated him more at the moment. “Why else would I force you to sit with me?”
Jungkook’s stupid, and so are you, so you’d rather not tell him how desperately you want to be loved by him today.
( ♡ ) 
In all fairness, you thought you would lose nothing.
You thought you would lose nothing because in the first place, you barely expected anything out of Jungkook. Liking him didn’t mean that you were indebted to him, and liking you back isn’t something that he owed to you either.
You weren’t expecting Jungkook to fall on his knees and say something stupid to hint at his mutual love for you (although you did think about it a couple of times), but you atleast expected a little bit of respect from him to try and see the strength it took you to even confess.
You planned it perfectly, even taking a page off his book and making a whole word document for it wherein you spent days typing whatever crossed your mind throughout the day and erasing what seemed the most impossible throughout the night. 
In your word document, you and Jungkook would be out in the snow, skating in an outdoor rink even if neither of you know how to. You figure that you won’t attempt to drag (read: hobble with) him to the middle of the ice because in case he doesn’t like you back, the waddle back to the exit wouldn’t be as awkward; if Jungkook does like you back, you’ll still be hobbling to the exit, albeit happily.
In your word document, there’s a spine of a script that you would say when the day comes. You’ll skim along the lines of how you’ve never been so enamored with someone in your entire life (with the internal note that you’ll dial it back a bit if his expression turns sour), of how bright he makes your days for you, and how he doesn’t have to be obligated to like you back.
In your word document, you’re set. You’ve planned a foolproof blueprint of what would turn out, whether or not Jungkook is set on loving you the way you desperately want to be —
Except now, Jungkook completely undoes everything you’ve ever worked for.
Now, he looks at you with a glint in his eye that looks more apologetic than it is endearing. You don’t even know what led to your heartbreak exactly because one minute, you were just studying, and by the next, Jungkook’s already letting you down even if you haven't had the chance to rise.
You swear on your life that you weren’t giving any signals at all that you were actually about to confess. You were only silent, refusing to talk to him because you were too stressed over your task and that you were scared you would burst into tears if you tried mouthing the formula out loud, yet Jungkook mistakes it for your love.
Whatever you do on a daily basis, whatever you do based on your nature, Jungkook mistakes it for a confession that he wasn’t even supposed to hear until the end of the week.
He wasn’t wrong about the fact that you love him — what he’s wrong about is his assumption that your silence around him when it’s just the two of you, right now while you lose your mind over an assignment as you’re dressed in last week’s sweater and last semester’s horror, is your confession.
“I’m sorry, Y/N,” Jungkook winces, gently patting you on the shoulder as you’re yet to digest his rejection. “But I just don’t think we’ll work out.”
( ♡ ) 
You theorized that getting over Jungkook would be fairly easy on the chance that he rejects you after your confession.
You figure that Jungkook himself as a concept would be drastically difficult to move on from because he was just so lovable. He doesn’t know how to read a room and it’s one of his better quirks when you’re worrying over nothing. He doesn’t know much about knowing when to let up, and it comes in clutch when he’s pushing you to wholeheartedly do an assignment even if you’re already burnt out from crying.
Jungkook, as a concept, is indestructible. He’s the everyday variant of the goodness that some frat guys possess occasionally. He’s the realistic, attainable version of a main lead in a manhwa that’s only perfect 1/4 into the plot. 
He’s the manifestation of every good deed a stranger has done for you, except he’s someone you know with your heart and not just someone you could sketch from memory. 
With that, you also figured that moving on from Jungkook can’t be that hard because he was too out of reach despite being in the same friend group as you. Surely, it wouldn’t be so catastrophically hard to move on from a guy who just gasps for air every five minutes when he’s in charge of cooking in the BBQ hangout (instead of using the exhaust like a normal person), or from a guy who thinks citing references for a paper is only a suggestion.
The funny thing about it all is that you never actually confessed to Jungkook.
Actually (and contrary to the assumptions of the other friends you have from your circle), you’ve never said it to his face that you do have a crush on him. You’re ultimately known to be the friendliest person to ever walk the campus, and while not the most confrontational, they atleast expected for you to confess to Jungkook in your own way.
What actually happened was that Jungkook read through you — he does happen to be right about your feelings for him! He’s the second friendliest person right beneath you, and so the way he rejected you should never sting this much.
Jungkook thought it out meticulously. He read into the way you spent extra attention listening to him with your eyes practically gleaming. He read into the way you’d lag back behind him and hold him by his wrist whenever you were all crossing the street. Hell, he even read into the way you would take a shot at opening the extremely tight water bottle from the vending machine before everyone else.
The funny, tragic thing about it is that whilst Jungkook wasn’t wrong about pinpointing your feelings for him — you never confessed.
Jeon Jungkook, the second, ultimate friendliest man that your university has ever known, rejected you without even hearing the actual words from you.
He’s turned his back on you even before you could reach him, and the realization sinks in you unsettlingly. You never expected for him to like you back because it would be unfair of you, and you knew that; what just happened to hurt you most was that Jungkook didn’t even think twice.
He hadn’t given you the chance to pour your heart out at the very least.
He hadn’t even given you the space to breathe right after the rejection, because he skips and puts a smile on before winking, telling you that he’ll never speak of it again because you must probably be embarrassed.
The funniest thing about it all is that you aren’t embarrassed — you’re actually devastated about it.
It’s an odd event for Jungkook to feel lonely because with such a big friend group, he never thought he’d feel a little empty despite literally rubbing elbows in a circular table. He never thought he’d come to be a little annoyed at Jimin and his routine, playful, borderline offensive banter he’d always have with you at the top of the morning, and he never thought he’d even be more annoyed over the absence of it.
There’s one less laugh in the circle. One less bag strewn underneath the table, one less coffee order written on the notes app, and one less person to look for when hanging out.
You’re missing from the friend group, and oddly enough, Jungkook seems to be the most devastated about it.
“Why is Y/N not here?” he asks in the middle of Jin retelling his drunken fishing story, grabbing the attention of everyone in the table and maybe just about everyone else’s in the common area with the way his voice is frantic. “And why is she there with the new kid instead?”
Everyone flits through separate conversations after Jungkook’s interruption, some even wincing to themselves because although they know about your admiration for the guy and not your confession-that-wasn’t-one, they figure that nothing good could come out of Jungkook sucker-punching the new kid in his head.
“I don’t know, man. Buddy system, maybe?” Jin shrugs, stealing his food because it was obvious that Jungkook’s attention is everywhere but himself and the table.
Jungkook snorts, crossing his arms tightly to the point that even he feels a little suffocated. His entire face is crumpled with hurt, eyebrows furrowed out of frustration when you still aren’t looking at him; when you’re still not looking at him with confusion in your eyes, silently telling him off for glaring.
“Buddy system? We’re in uni. Who the fuck would bully that guy?”
“By the looks of it, probably you.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” he huffs, refusing to unclench his fists on his thighs.
“Well, what’s it to you that Y/N’s hanging out with someone new? What are you so heated for?” Jin elaborates, eyes flitting to you again.
Jungkook could only glare at you.
“What are you so nosy for?” he asks defensively, leaning back on his chair in a faux display of relaxation when all he wants to do is to remove the stupid smile on the guy’s face as he watches you talk.
Unlike Jungkook, Yoongi’s not stupid at all — in fact, he’s been vigilantly aware of Jungkook’s glare on the side of his face ever since you sat in front of him.
Yoongi’s not stupid, so he angles himself in a way that Jungkook gets to see him more. He doesn’t know the guy personally, but he does know of him and his “charm” that seems to make everyone go nuts for him. 
If looks could kill, then Yoongi would’ve already had mourners at his feet, but if provocation could posion, then Jungkook would already be frothing at the mouth.
The thing is, Yoongi doesn’t even know about your admiration nor your foiled confession to Jungkook. The latter hasn’t even done anything personally to him. 
All he knows is that you’re in a big friend group and that you chose to sit with him, your friend whom you share a couple of advanced classes with but not a friend-friend like Jungkook is, and that you’re very easy on the eyes and admirable yourself if he thinks about it (he doesn’t need much time to ponder over it) — and, that he doesn’t really like being glared at.
“No really, I insist!” he laughs, pulling out his handwritten reviewer from a backpack with a grin. “I don’t know anybody else who likes making reviewers anymore by hand, so really, you’re just perfect to get them.”
“But you worked so hard on them,” you gasp, eyes already widening in both surprise and awe at the thick stack of papers in front of you. Yoongi’s handwriting and formatting are perfect; there’s no unnecessary calligraphy, the vividness of the highlighter is just right, and there’s even sticky notes at the bottom for additional details and references you could cross-check. “I.. I don’t want you to feel that I’m taking advantage-
”
“But I offered! You didn’t ask for reviewers from me shamelessly like every other opportunist does,” Yoongi laughs, throwing his head back as he slides the papers closer to you. “I’d be a really shitty senior not to give you any help. If anything, I think you deserve even better than-
”
Jungkook can’t resist.
Jungkook can’t take any more of watching you and Yoongi push and pull over whatever topic he can’t hear nor force Jin to eavesdrop on. He can’t take another second of seeing you be so happy talking to a guy that he doesn’t know, so much so that he comes up to you without a second thought.
“Hey,” he greets, his body only turned to you, completely ignoring Yoongi and blocking him off from your sight. “You didn’t order any coffee.”
You angle your body slightly to excuse yourself, except Jungkook conveniently happens to mirror your every move, confusing you even more. “Oh, I wasn’t feeling like it,” you trail, looking up at him in confusion while Yoongi could see right through him.
“Really?” Jungkook replies, the smile on his face being far from amused, eyes narrowed as he tries to catch up with the own annoyance that he harbors. “Because I’m seeing two coffees right now, and one’s in front of you, so
” he trails, shrugging his shoulders exaggeratedly.
Jungkook’s jaw is still clenched, along with his fists by his sides. He’s standing tall between you and Yoongi with his shoulders squared and his face steeled, the immovable forces that are him and the unnamed pit in his stomach starting to garner attention.
Namjoon has his phone out. 
Hoseok only has one cheek remaining on the seat because he’s ready to stand up and collect bets. 
You’re still sitting, mostly confused, when you realize the attention that’s starting to build towards the three of you.
“Yes, Jungkook. Great observation,” you snicker, the discreet roll of your eyes making him take offense.
“Oh okay, I see. So you were lying by saying that you weren’t feeling it, and I don’t get the hold-up of you-
”
“What did you come here for now, Jungkook?” you angrily whisper, keeping your head down as you retain your gaze on him and lightly tap at the table to indicate to Yoongi for the both of you to move. “It’s a little far-fetched for you to come all over here to pick a fight about coffee.”
Jungkook huffs, turning his head back to Yoongi behind him because he most definitely saw your signal. The lazy, amused gaze of Yoongi is what sets him off even further, the anger in his eyes unmistakable, except you recognize it for only what it is and not jealousy, because Jungkook doesn’t see you like that.
Or atleast that’s what the both of you assume.
Jungkook, your best friend, scoffs loudly.
“You sound so defensive right now.”
( ♡ ) 
You don’t respond much to Jungkook’s calls. 
As a matter of fact, you don’t respond much to Jungkook at all.
You don’t show up whenever he’s present, meaning that you’re only magically available whenever there’s half of your friend group at the most because if there’s more, then the search for the missing members would ensue, then you’d end up squished in a long table next to Jungkook again.
It’s very much like him to form grudges, yet he can’t even tell if he’s capable of having one towards you. Jungkook, with all his chest and afflictions, wants so badly to hate you because you’ve been blowing him off ever since he literally and physically came between you and Yoongi.
He apologized to you for that (and not to Yoongi because he didn’t really matter to him at all), and he doesn’t know the answer for it yet because his messages still remain unread. He’s enlisted the help of your mutual friends on various occasions by trying to get them to give all his little treats for you, yet you refuse them as soon as you catch wind that it’s from Jungkook.
He even tried studying for real in the library in hopes that reverse psychology (he thinks that’s what it’s called) would work and that thinking he doesn’t want you to come would make you do the opposite, yet it still doesn’t work. Jungkook’s already mad that he studied for nothing (he’s more interested in getting you to notice him than to actually learn), but he becomes even more heated to realize that your anger for him is just directed at him alone.
You still talk to your best friends, with the exception of him, and Jungkook has never been more envious of people who are apparently of the same status as him.
Jungkook wants you to drag him like you drag Sora to the nail salon and have you whisper at his ear to tell the nail tech not to cut your cuticles because you’ve been afraid of getting them done since that 1/34th part of a medical drama episode you watched on your phone.
Jungkook wants you to complain to him like you complain to Namjoon when you’re frustrated with a professor whom you’re convinced is only critical to you and no one else, later making him promise not to tell anyone else from your friend group because they like said professor.
Jungkook wants you to run to him as you always did, just because you feel like it. He wants to sit in silence with you again and put his hand on your knee when you’re in the verge of tears just looking at your schedule for the week.
He wants to stand guard again outside the bathroom door of the expensive coffee shop because it’s either the lock is broken or because Namjoon's managed to instill in you the existence of ghosts in cold spots.
He wants to be the Jungkook like you’ve always known, again, because it seems like you’ve forgotten him completely. You have the Yoongi now, it seems like — the smarter, more composed, and more charismatic variant of him that he wants to get rid of because Jungkook never predicted the existence of him.
Even more, Jungkook didn’t even entertain the concept of him being replaced because it was always the two of you together, even in a sea of friends. 
He’s your best friend, your confidant even, but nothing more — all Jungkook feels is that he’s even less than the status the both of you are assigned to be. 
He’s angry and sad and disappointed all at the same time because he thought he had almost lost you since he rejected your confession. You were fine; you were as fine as you could be for someone rejected when it comes to yearning to be his, and yet the moment you let Yoongi in, Jungkook feels as if you threw everything the both of you had just for him.
“Just so you know, student-teacher relationships are illegal,” he corners you one morning in your dorm, two godforsaken weeks after chasing you around the campus yet turning up empty.
“What the fuck are you on about?” you immediately scrunch your nose at him, the accusation he throws at you being too farfetched to the point that you don’t even think of shutting the door at him, ignoring Eunji’s betrayal for you by pretending to come over.
“What am I on about?” Jungkook exasperates, the scoff that leaves him making you feel small in front of him. “You’re literally the one who’s getting chummy with fucking Yoongi of all people!"
"Yoongi's a teaching assistant! He's our senior! Do you not know that?"
"Do I look like I'm interested in any other people outside of our circle?" he retorts, lips turned up in a snarl. Jungkook provokes you with a sarcastic glare, the look on his face enough to make you throw your head back in irritation.
"Come on, even Jin and Jimin are friends with Yoongi and-..."
"This is not about them!" 
"But you just-..." you stop as soon Jungkook interrupts you, losing your gaze on him for a single second to close your door and when you look back, you find that he’s already comfortable being vindictive on your bed, his arms crossed and his back straight.
"Also, teacher and teaching assistant both have the word teach so it's literally still illegal," he narrows his eyes sarcastically, the tone to his voice unclear despite his words suggesting otherwise. "You look so stupid right now."
"Jungkook can you stop?!" you burst, your temples stinging at the back and forth that Jungkook’s thrown the both of you in. “What the hell is going on with you?"
Jungkook had sworn to himself up and down that he has so much stuff to pick with you. He knows he has so much baggage to unpack and how much shit he has to bring up, even if it’s only been two weeks with you. He’s partly relieved that you’re in front of him and you still haven’t fled, yet a large part of him is beyond frustrated with you because you don’t even look like as if your time apart has taken a toll on you.
Between the two of you, it’s only Jungkook who looks like his distraught has manned him completely beyond surrender. Even coming to see you by hatching a plan with a hesitant friend is something he considers an act beyond surrender — whatever the space is between surrender and demand is where Jungkook lies with you.
"No, what's going on with you!” he argues, standing to his feet to come face-to-face with you. “You can't just spin this around when I've done nothing but be a good friend to you!"
"You think I'm not being a good friend to you just because I don't spend every single minute attached to you? I can still hang out outside of our friend group without being-..."
"This is not about our friend group!" Jungkook emphasizes once again, the tell-tale sting of tears behind his eyes coming up because he feels as if you can’t hear him no matter how much he repeats himself. ”This is about us and how you abandoned me ever since I rejected you!"
"I didn't abandon you, Jungkook!" you spit, pushing at his chest lightly with your finger to get him to back up from your face yet he refuses to. He’s still insistent at staring you down with his jaw clenched, eyes wide and unblinking because he knows that if he moves even just a millimeter askew, he’d cry. “You didn't even give me the chance to confess to you! You rejected me without even hearing me out. Do you think I would still be able to talk to you, face to face like how you want so badly, as if nothing happened?"
"The answer would've been the same even if you confessed,” he grits with his chest heavy, not at the way he keeps holding his breath in order not to break down in front of you, but because you look at him with so much disdain that it makes him want to puke.
"Do you not think I know that?" you laugh humorlessly, gnawing on your bottom lip as you don’t drop his gaze. “Do you think I didn't prepare for that possibility? I knew what could've happened if I confessed and I'd still be okay with it, Jungkook!" you raise your voice, throat already giving out at the slightest pressure because you know you lost the fight ever since you let him in. "What I'm not okay with is that you didn't even give me the chance.”
It’s evil, really, with the way no amount of self-pity could ever pull you from the grave you’ve dug up. You went for Jungkook, carrying all grief you knew you were bound to feel, and yet you still feel unprepared. You still feel unworthy even moping for someone like Jungkook because not even his rejection, nor anyone else’s acceptance of your admiration by some sort of miracle, is enough to make you feel like you’d be missed.
Your two weeks without Jungkook is your rehearsal for the two months, then two years, then two forevers eventually without him by your side. You had still been able to live by yourself and with your friends, excluding him, and you thought you were fine because it feels as if nothing had changed.
You thought you were fine until Jungkook gets in your face to tell you that it’s not, and all over again, you’re reminded of how desperately you want to be loved by him to the point that you’d rather drown in your own pity to try and preserve whatever’s left of you.
"I told you the answer would-..."
"Shut up!" you cry, steeling your nerves when you realize that Jungkook’s angrily crying in front of you, wiping at his eyes hastily. ”For the love of god, shut up!"
Jungkook stays quiet, not because you told him to, but because nothing good comes to mind when he realizes that you’re crying because of him.
"See? You don't even get where I'm coming from because you're not even giving me the chance to explain myself without making it all about you,” you sob, finally pushing him away, to which he lets you. "That's the problem with you, Jungkook. You're too self-involved."
"Not true," Jungkook whispers, shaking his head earnestly even if he feels the stupidest he has ever did in his life in front of you.
He follows your steps out of routine even if his brain had convinced his system that he hates you just seconds ago, arms instinctively trying to crowd you when you almost trip on the flooring on your way to the coat rack.
"Since you keep insisting that I abandoned you," you chuckle dryly before grabbing your jacket, turning your back on Jungkook and on your own space, which had just been the default hangout place of the both of you for the longest time, in pursuit of your own quiet without him. "Let me follow through."
Jungkook doesn’t want to tell you how desperately he wants you to want him again, to love him as you already did, and neither do you.
( ♡ ) 
The perks of having a big friend group is that the absence of several members wouldn’t make that much of a difference when it comes to hanging out. It would still sustain itself without a few extra voices joining in on the chatter watching movies and the bullying when it comes to a forgotten birthday greeting here and there.
The downside of being in one, is that said big friend group doesn’t matter at all to Jungkook when you’re not in it.
The lengths that your friend (read: a word that Jungkook’s come to abhor) has went through since your fight at your dorm are basically incomprehensible because he’s fully involved himself.
He’s pining after you pathetically, just like how you had always dreamed of, yet seeing him take turn after turn just trying to gain your forgiveness for something you’ve always pitied yourself for makes you feel guilty.
In Jungkook’s defense, he wants to be forgiven and loved (again) as desperately as he acts on an everyday basis. Not only is he pathetic in the sense that he’s hopeless, but also pathetic in the light that he wants the entirety of you (stubbornness and occasional sharpness included) to rub off on him.
“I know I’m stupid. I-I.. I know that I was unfair for not even letting you confess your feelings because I felt like dying when you started to ignore me,” he mumbles to your bedsheets, his legs crossed on the ground and his head muffled by the fabric because he doesn’t even want to sit next to you in fear of you revoking his chance to apologize in person, again, as if that’s not what he had been doing the past weeks. “Y/N, you don’t deserve someone as stupid as me and I hate it so, so bad.”
The sound of Jungkook apologizing to you has already been repeated enough to the point you’ve learned when to tune him out, but with the way his heart precedes his tone this time, you stop folding your clothes in favor of Jungkook who’s just two seconds away from passing out on your bed by fabric conditioner-bathed quilt-induced suffocation, to which he couldn’t pass up on because it was your scent and he missed hugging you.
“I can’t catch up with you on anything that you’re talking about with Yoongi. The only times I open a book are when I want to look at you but I don’t want you to see me. I can’t— I can barely even talk to you without feeling like I’m beneath you,” he admits lowly, the truth of his rejection finally springing up a little too much, and almost a little too late. “I thought, stupidly, that we wouldn’t work because you deserve someone better.”
“I don’t need you to catch up with me, Jungkook,” you murmur, lightly slapping his cheeks because he looks sleepy from all the sniffing he’s done on your quilt, but really, his eyes are only narrowed into slits because he feels like he’s about to cry. Again.
“But I need to, b-because when we run out of things to talk about that you’re willingly to dumb down to my level, what else could we catch up on?” 
“You’re not stupid. I just say-
”
“No. Don’t make excuses for me,” he laughs lightly, still sat on your carpet obediently like a dog because he doesn’t want to push your boundaries. “I’m beneath you and I didn’t want to drag you down with me because I.. I didn’t feel that you deserve me,” he confesses. “But I want you so badly, Y/N. You have no idea.”
Jungkook wants you so badly, that in your insistence of self-pity, it was his self-preservation that led him to cry by himself when you finally left the library after not-confessing to him.
He wants you so badly, that in his fit of self-preservation disguised into stubbornness, he had tamped down his desperation for you.
“I want to catch up with you, not you to slow down for me,” Jungkook rests his chin on your thigh, his wide, pleading eyes looking up at you. “I’m so sorry, my baby. I’m so, so, so sorry for being stupid enough to let you go the first time,” he tilts his head, resting his cheek on your awaiting hand. “Please. I’m just begging you to slow down for me this one time,” Jungkook swallows the lump in his throat, nudging your hand gently with his cheek. “Please let me look stupid trying to earn you.”
Jungkook, without fail, tells you how desperately he wants to be loved by you.
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forlix · 9 months ago
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— incurable playboy turned doting boyfriend was a character development arc nobody saw coming for christopher bang, including (especially) his frat brothers.
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words・2.8k pairing・frat president!chris x gn!reader genres・fluff, humor, hurt/comfort, college!au, fuckboy!chris, boys being boys, kissing, implied sex so mdni warnings・substance use, talk of past heartbreak
a/n・here is "nobody believes you're dating" w/chan, requested by none other than my @rachalixie for my 2k event !! anny, i hope u love this fic as much as i love u; thank you for allowing me to write something so self-indulgent <3
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In the deafening throes of one of Phi Mu Alpha’s spring kickbacks, Minho finds Jeongin and Seungmin standing in motionless silence by the kitchen counter. Both boys are gaping at something with an intensity that dips egregiously into the realm of creepy. He moves to pour himself a shot.
“What the fuck are you people looking at?”
Seungmin prods a pointer finger in the relevant direction. It takes a few seconds of scanning the scene for Minho to find what he’s referring to. He digs a knuckle into his eye, instantly confused by what he’s seeing. Maybe the gaping is justified.
The windows and doors have all been thrown open to invite the balmy April weather into the foyer of the frathouse. There’s a large crowd of people huddled around a long, foldable table stationed before the stairs; Jaehyun clutches a ping-pong ball between his fingers, singular eye squinted shut as he takes aim. The number of remaining solo cups dwindles rapidly, as does the players’ sobriety.
Something—someone—is missing.
Not to say “beer pong virtuoso” was one of the reasons Chris was elected frat president, but you’d think the guy had a career path in basketball with how he’s given the entire Greek life community alcohol poisoning by courtesy of two or three plastic balls alone. Minho has never known him to miss a shot, let alone miss out on a game.
Today, however, the reigning champion is only spectating, seated above the ongoing match on one of the steps of the main staircase.
A beautiful stranger is sitting beside him, cheek pressed to his shoulder as you peer at the match through the bannister.
You say something inaudible. The laugh it earns from Chris is bright enough to pick up from a few streets down. He leans in to murmur something in return, and you slide your hand over his nape to pull his mouth onto yours, light blush crawling up and over your ears. The way Chris melts into you can only be described as familiar, his eyes slowly fluttering shut, finger hooking delicately beneath your chin, grin going lopsided as your lips part—
“That’s enough,” Minho hisses, tearing his eyes away with considerable effort. “Aren’t you ashamed? Just fucking ogling.”
Jeongin shakes his head, grinning. “It’s dinner and a show. We’d be idiots not to.”
By dinner, he must mean the gallon of chocolate milk he’s been drinking from for the last hour. He now holds out said gallon with the intent to cheers. Seungmin picks up the entire handle and does the same.
Minho sighs, clinks his glass against theirs, and they throw back their respective refreshments in unison.
“Anywho.” Jeongin swipes the back of his hand over his mouth before going on. “You guys know who that is?”
Minho resurfaces with a wince, relishing in the bitter aftermath, then motions for Seungmin to give the bottle back straightaway. He arrived to the function late and he’s not nearly as drunk as he’d like to be.
Seungmin obliges Minho only after another heady swig. “No clue. Probably just another fling, no?”
“Mmm,” Jeongin hums in assent. “It’s Chris we’re talking about, after all.”
"Agreed. Case closed.”
There’s an air of finality in Seungmin’s voice—but Minho isn’t so sure.
Perhaps because he has never noticed that Chris had dimples until now; or because you fold so naturally into Chris' side after your kiss ends, head nuzzling against the crook of his neck and hand seeking out his to hold in your lap; or, most likely, because Chris' eyes seem to return to you when he looks at you, as if his gaze drifting anywhere else is but a momentary departure from where it really belongs. As if he comes home every time you come into his line of vision.
Whatever the reason, the idea coalesces in Minho’s mind, even as inebriation begins to fall over his cognitive faculties like a curtain, that the boys have got it wrong.
Jeongin utters his name, jolting him out of his trance. There’s another shot lifted halfway to Minho’s lips that hasn’t budged in minutes. “Whatcha thinking about?”
Minho looks at Jeongin first, Seungmin next, then back at Chris and his stunning companion. He’s not inclined to answer the question in full, but he can in truth. A coy smile crosses his face.
“Threesome?”
Jeongin laughs hard enough to collapse onto the kitchen island. Seungmin drags a hand down his face. “Come on, man.”
In the corner of his eye, you’ve gone back to kissing again, slow and sweet and secretive. Chris' gentle hold on your jaw shields you from view but fails to hide his lovesick smile. Dimly, Minho thinks that maybe his friend has met his match.
Then, he takes four shots in rapid succession—and stops thinking altogether.
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Christopher Bang’s love life is like a horror movie and romcom spliced together: a fiasco of a film to which his housemates have front row seats.
The frat’s upperclassmen live in sets of four-bed, two-bath suites comprising a small common space with a kitchen and a sitting area, sandwiched by bedrooms on either side. It is in that common space that Changbin, Hyunjin, and Jisung often see or hear Chris stumbling home after a night out, entangled with a different attractive stranger every time—so often, in fact, that they’ve come to believe that he’s deathly allergic to anything bigger than a one-and-done hookup.
They can’t judge. In part because they’d be throwing stones from glass houses, but also because the man’s penchant for empty physicality is far from unfounded. His past self gave pieces of his heart to the wrong people, contracted first-degree burns from the guileless warmth he sought out. Now, his version of “intimacy” is less a connotation of closeness than it is a self-contradiction, for it should be impossible for so much distance to remain between two people in a single bed.
Chris hasn’t vocalized any of this. Nor have his housemates discussed it with each other. The knowledge simply exists in the air between the four of them like something akin to taboo, dipping in and out of acknowledgement depending on the circumstance.
This might be the circumstance of all time.
At around 11:40 A.M. on a Saturday, three doors in the suite open at once. Hyunjin and Changbin aren’t coincidence—the latter is coercing the former to go to the gym again—but they lift their eyes to the opposite side of the living room, and the slice of milk bread dangling from Hyunjin’s lips very nearly takes a fatal fall. Changbin manages to snatch it up with an extended hand.
Chris has just emerged from his room as well. Your silhouette follows close behind, your mouth stretching into a yawn as you massage the sleep from your eyes. You’re sporting a mesh green sweater identical to one Chris owns. They find Chris' accessories more interesting than his clothes, though: two hickeys peeking out from beneath his jaw and the base of his neck.
Chris sees Hyunjin and Changbin right away, and his expression goes utterly blank, not unlike their faces as they watch you close his door meticulously. You turn around and gasp.
The four of you stare at each other for what feels like multiple business days. At least, Hyunjin, Changbin, and Chris stare at each other; your eyes dart between the men on the other side of the room and the man next to you, silently pleading for him to say something. He does not for a long while.
Then, he lunges for one of the throw pillows on the couch and flings it at Hyunjin like a shot put. It ricochets off his chest and lands on the floor rather anticlimactically.
“Distraction!” Chris yells anyways, grabbing your hand and tearing towards the exit, wild grin on his face. “Go, go, go!”
Your raucous laughter lingers even after you’ve been hauled away, accompanied by an unintelligible, breathless shout of something along the lines of my toothbrush—and then the front door clicks shut, and there are two.
Changbin and Hyunjin lock eyes, struggling to process what just happened. Hyunjin is the first to move, wandering hesitantly into the bathroom that Chris and Jisung share. Nothing about the place looks out of the ordinary.
“Well, shit,” Hyunjin says out loud.
That is, aside from the two toothbrushes slotted in the holder on Chris' side of the counter.
Something moves in the bathroom window, catching his attention. Hyunjin looks over just in time to spot you and Chris dart out onto the lawn two floors below. Chris has his arm draped over your shoulders, yours wrapped around his waist. Your smile is discernible all the way from here, and Hyunjin sees a perfect mirror of it on his friend’s face when Chris glances at the frathouse over his shoulder. 
Has he always had dimples?
Moments later, Changbin joins him in peering out the window. A high-pitched cackle erupts from the older boy’s lips. “Look at that idiot.”
Standing off to the left is a tiny, astonished Han Jisung, his arms full of groceries, jaw sitting squarely the grass and whites of his eyes on full display as he watches you and Chris stroll away.
Hyunjin laughs with his whole fucking body. Changbin whips out his phone and takes a picture.
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When you finally breach the topic, it’s because you don’t think you can physically study for another minute—but also because, after multiple long months of fruitless sparring, your curiosity finally wins.
Your boyfriend is seated in your desk chair, feet kicked up onto your mattress with his laptop propped up on his thighs. His features have rearranged themselves into an expression of intense focus as he pores over his production homework. You can hear music blaring through his headphones from all the way here.
You uncross your legs from below you, scootch across your bed, and lift your hands to cradle his cheeks. He startles as if coming out of a trance, then begins to smile when he reads the words hi, Channie off your lips.
His headphones fall around his neck. He sets his laptop down onto your desk with a dull thunk. The next thing to drop is you when Chris seizes you by the waist and tackles you into the mattress. The somber atmosphere of your study session is shattered by your muted laughter and Chris pressing his lips to every inch of your exposed skin he can. He saves your mouth for last.
“Hey, beautiful,” he answers, but only after kissing the living daylights out of you, the syllables soft and silky with adoration. “Missed me?”
You drag your eyes from his brown irises with blown pupils to his sloping nose, from his disheveled dark locks to his cordate lips, so plush and warm against your own that you swear you still feel them there. You brush a hand over the back of his neck, your head now spinning so badly that you barely remember what you wanted to ask him.
“Always,” you say. “I was starting to feel jealous of your homework.”
He chuckles. “Shit, I’ll drop out of college right now, baby. Just say the word.”
“You’re perfect,” you hum.
“Says you,” he murmurs, nudging the tip of his nose against yours.
Your lips find each other’s again—needless to say, your study sessions aren’t known for their productivity. Some time passes before you come up for air. Even afterwards, Chris doesn’t let you go far, pulling you into his chest by the curve of your waist, nuzzling his cheek into your hairline. You only need to whisper for him to hear your question.
“Can I ask you something?”
“'Course,” he returns, and you’re close enough to sense him tighten with apprehension. “Everything okay?”
“Yes, don’t worry.” You print a kiss to the side of his neck for extra reassurance. “It’s just
I’ve been meaning to ask how your friends feel about me.”
He tightens with something else now: surprise, you’re guessing; you’re hoping. You hadn’t seriously considered that the answer could be negative, but it’s dawning on you now that the possibility of that isn’t zero.
“Where’s this coming from?” Chris inquires, his tone opaque.
You hesitate, mentally reviewing your interactions with your boyfriend’s social circle. Hyunjin and Jisung can’t make eye contact with you when they speak to you. Minho does nothing but make eye contact with you whether he’s speaking to you or not. Jeongin and Seungmin can maintain small talk for about ten seconds before they start looking like they’d rather be anywhere else. Changbin is the only one you’ve held a conversation with, and only because you were going up the same stairs at the same time and the alternative would have been mind-numbing silence.
What is the best way for you to say this?
“Well,” you begin, “I can’t help but notice that they act a little—when I’m around, they’re a bit, uh—”
“—crazy,” Chris offers. “Completely fucking bat-shit crazy.”
“Yes. Exactly that.”
Chris threads a hand through your hair, the comforting gesture doing nothing to assuage your worry. It seems there’s some truth behind your impressions. Your next words are tinged with a quiet sadness.
“I’m not imagining things, then?”
“No, angel,” he sighs. “But not for the reasons you think.”
A beat passes. Chris perceives your silence as a chance to backtrack, to opt out of this conversation if it’s one he’s not ready for. He would’ve leapt at the opportunity once.
But he realizes in that moment, with your voice gentle against his ears and your touch so doting upon his skin, how much has changed since he met you: from the color of the sky to the word home and everything in between, including his cynicism towards love and all the iterations of forever it holds. 
With that epiphany comes another, then another: he wants you to know why his friends are acting insane, wants you to know about him and his past and all the wounds of his you never know you healed, wants you to spend the rest of this forever with him.
His pointer finger dusts beneath your chin, a wordless request for you to look at him, and he nearly liquifies when you do and he finds entire constellations in your eyes. 
“It’s a lot,” he mumbles, though he suspects you know that already; he suspects you know about the other stuff, too. 
You bring your hand to the side of his face, bring your forehead to rest upon his. Your closeness washes over him like a low summer tide lapping over sandy shores, a soothing balm spreading over scorched flesh. 
“It’s you,” you breathe. “I will love it just the same.”
Chris' held breath comes out in shudders.
So this is warmth.
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Minho and Felix are watching anime on the couch when a knock comes at their door, unfortunately during a pivotal moment of a pivotal episode. 
Minho hits pause with a ghastly groan. Felix laughs and rises to his feet, dashing into his room to grab the two silver necklaces he’ll be loaning out for the evening. “Coming!”
Outside, Chris is standing alone, hips and thighs accentuated by a pair of tight-fitting dress pants, sculpted chest and collarbones framed by a thin, cream-colored shirt with the top three buttons undone. Most of his hair has been pushed off his forehead, leaving a few locks free to fall over his right eyebrow. He’s rolling up his sleeves when Felix opens the door, veined forearms flexing as a result of the effort.
“Well?” He asks. Minho cranes his neck to look past Felix.
Both boys start to holler and whistle like excited macaques.
“What in the Calvin Klein is this?” Felix shouts, spinning Chris around by the shoulders. “You look insane, bro. Holy fuck.”
“What’s the occasion, young man?” Minho inadvertently sounds like a gruff uncle. “Where are you going dressed like that, huh?”
Chris' laugh comes easier nowadays. What’s more, it comes in a way that reaches the rest of him, that ends in a tiny, high squeak that you really have to look for in order to hear.
Felix and Minho can't help but replicate his smile. Those clothes look good on him, yes—but happiness looks better.
“You guys are silly,” Chris giggles. Dimples indent his cheeks as he accepts the necklaces from Felix. “Thanks, man. I’ll give ‘em back tomorrow.”
“No rush,” Felix replies, grinning. “Have fun, yeah?”
“We will.” Chris starts to retreat down the hallway, hands moving to clasp the jewelry around his neck, but not before he blows the both of them a kiss.
“Be back before ten!” Minho hollers; Chris laughs again, turns a corner, and disappears.
Felix closes the door. His smile falters fast. Minho has brought his face mere centimeters away, his expression thoroughly humorless.
“Tell me only the truth, Lee Yongbok,” he deadpans.
“O-okay—”
“Is Chris in a relationship?”
“—oh.” Felix frowns. “Well, yeah.”
Minho blanches. “How—how long?”
“One year, give or take? Anniversary’s today.”
Minho is stunned. Felix is stunned that Minho is stunned.
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