#ten years of this i think i've earned a break

[mcbitchtits]

nazis wear red,

but punching gets blue,

adventure is back (!)

so i’ll see you in june.

---

I only did one this year! So please enjoy all the rest and ignore that one joke I accidentally did twice in this whole shebang

2022 | 2021 | 2020 | 2019 | 2018 | 2017 | 2016 | 2015 | 2014

[moonlitwitchdaisy]

a little note: this was one of the most enjoyable headcanons i've written. if gege can't give toji a happy ending, then we will! hehe, i hope you like it! normally, sukuna was next on the list, but since i've already mentioned toji’s best friend, it wouldn’t feel right to not write about him next. so, up next is ufc’s bloody monster shiu ;) watching shiu fight, all sweaty in the ring, is probably everyone’s dream here, don’t you think?

.ᐟ check Champions League's Masterlist to meet the other champions

.ᐟ check out his bestie ufc's bloody monster!shiu headcanons

nfl’s dirty player!toji who earned his nickname for his ruthless and rule-breaking style of play.

nfl’s dirty player!toji who is considered the greatest tight end of all time. This man was practically built to dominate this position with his size, strength, and speed.

nfl’s dirty player!toji who, despite his dirty plays, loves being called “The Bulldozer,” especially when it comes from his female fans. He enjoys knowing how manly they think he is.

nfl’s dirty player!toji who constantly mocks MLB’s best player, Gojo, in interviews because Toji has way more thirst-trap edits. “Oh, you’re talking about that scrawny guy? Of course they’re going to make more edits of a real man like me.”

nfl’s dirty player!toji who posted a photo with Stephen Curry after a basketball game (the second post on his barely-used Instagram) with the caption, “After f*cking Suguru Geto :)” and gained a million likes in under 20 minutes. (Not to mention, he absolutely despises the NBA star Geto.)

nfl’s dirty player!toji whose only trusted friend is his best buddy, the famous former boxer Shiu Kong.

nfl’s dirty player!toji who grew up in a terrible household where his family despised him.

nfl’s dirty player!toji who got the scar near his lip during a violent fight with his brother.

nfl’s dirty player!toji who hates that scar because it reminds him of the disgusting family that never loved him.

nfl's dirty player!single dad!toji whose jersey number is 22 (the day his son was born).

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who, despite wanting to spend time with his son, reluctantly agrees to hire a babysitter because of his demanding job.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who is extremely picky about babysitters and has already rejected over 100 candidates.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji whose eyes widen in shock when he sees your name among the applicants—what the hell is the coach’s precious, ten-years-younger daughter doing here?

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who calls you for an interview, pretending he doesn’t know you’re the coach’s daughter. He’s stunned when you greet him casually (as if the man standing in front of you wasn’t a player on the team your father coaches.) and somehow manage to bond with his grumpy son, Megumi, in a way he never thought possible.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who growls in displeasure when he learns you’ve been secretly saving money from your dad to move abroad. But when you promise to keep everything confidential if he hires you, he reluctantly agrees—Megumi’s already won over by you.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who comes home exhausted from practice, seeking silence and peace, only to find you in the kitchen with Megumi, decorating cupcakes and singing loudly. He grits his teeth in frustration and retreats to his room, though he secretly marvels at how his son, who rarely cares about anyone, listens to you intently.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who ends up eating those cupcakes late at night and, despite himself, admits they’re the best he’s ever had.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who rolls his eyes when Megumi talks about how beautiful, fun, and silly you are, even though he thinks the same things himself.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who secretly feels happy when you invite him to your park day with Megumi. He acts disinterested but can’t help smiling when he sees you and Megumi playing football on the grass. He eventually joins your game just to make you lose (not because he’s eager to play with you or anything, of course).

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who carries a sleeping Megumi home after the park and, when you say you should leave, grabs your wrist, pulling you closer to invite you to stay for a drink.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who sits on the couch in his massive living room, hesitant to start a conversation with you. When he finally manages to say, “Thank you,” and you respond with a warm smile, his heart pounds so hard it feels like it might burst out of his chest. This is not a good sign—he’s starting to fall for the one person he absolutely shouldn’t.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who drops everything during practice when he gets a call from Megumi’s preschool saying his son was in a fight.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who is relieved to find that Megumi wasn’t hurt but becomes enraged when he learns the fight started because another child called him a motherless bastard.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who calls you at Megumi’s request. When you show up 10 minutes later to comfort his upset son, all his anger dissipates. Even though he had explained part of the fight over the phone, seeing the worried and frustrated expression on your face makes him realize he chose the right person for this job. His heart knows it.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who grumbles when Megumi asks if you can sleep with him for the night but eventually agrees when you and Megumi give him those sad, pleading looks. He’s surprised to see you upset and can’t help but wonder if you might have some feelings for him.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who watches both his son and you sleep that night. His fingers lightly brush your cheek, and he curses himself, knowing someone as broken and ugly as him could never be loved by you.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who is stunned the next day when he goes to pick up his son from school and the boy Megumi fought with nervously apologizes, claiming he met Megumi’s mom.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who can’t sleep that night, replaying the boy’s words because his son didn’t have a mother. She left them. Instead of calling Shiu, he calls you in the middle of the night and, after hesitating, tells you everything that happened today.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who is shocked when you admit that after dropping Megumi off at school that morning, you confronted the boy (or rather, likely threatened him) and told him to stay away from Megumi. You also made it clear that he owed both Megumi and him an apology and told him to stop talking nonsense by saying you were Megumi’s mother. There’s a brief silence on the line after that. When Toji finally speaks, it’s only to say, “Don’t ever lie like that again,” before hanging up. That night, he decides he needs to drink until he forgets everything.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who, no matter how much he drinks, can never get what happened or what was said out of his mind.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who shows up at your apartment the next day after dropping Megumi off with Shiu. He storms in without waiting for an invitation, frustrated and angry.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who, with anger in his voice, tells you that getting so close to him and Megumi wasn’t a good idea, that you haven’t considered the heartbreak you’ll leave behind when you move abroad, and how unfair it is that you’ve made them love you so deeply. But the moment he sees tears streaming down your face, he realizes he’s completely ruined everything.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who, feels the sting of every punch you land on his chest in response to his words.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who, after hearing you say, “Don’t you understand, you idiot? I can’t leave you. I can’t be happy for even a single second without seeing you and Megumi. Ever since you let me into your little world, I’ve never wanted to leave. I-I don’t want to be without you, Toji. I want to be part of your small, beautiful family,” doesn’t hesitate for even a moment before crashing his lips onto yours. As he pulls back to catch his breath, he leans close to your ear and whispers, “I don’t think we could ever let you go, love. You’ve already become part of that small, beautiful family you wanted so much.” Then, he kisses you again, deeper this time.

nfl’s dirty player!single dad!toji who lies in your too-small bed, watching you sleep, realizing he’s the luckiest man alive.

nfl’s dirty player!dilf boyfriend!toji who, during practice, confessed to his coach (and future father-in-law) that he was in love with his daughter and that you had been looking after his child for a long time, only to get beaten to a pulp right then and there. He didn’t regret a single second of it.

nfl’s dirty player!dilf boyfriend!toji who, after practice, walked into the house with your father, battered and bruised, only to find you and Megumi waiting inside. When your father demanded you say it was all a joke, you simply replied, “I’m in love with the man whose face you just wrecked.” That earned Toji another punch from your father, but when your father saw the tears streaming down your face and realized how much you cared, he swore that if Toji ever hurt you, he’d kill him—no matter if he was the best player on the team.

nfl’s dirty player!dilf boyfriend!toji who, while cleaning his wounds, noticed your puffy, tear-swollen eyes. His lips curled into a smirk as he was about to tease you, but before he could, his son asked, “Are you guys dating?” Unsure of how to respond, he finally blurted out, “Yeah. I’m dating your mom, kid.”

nfl’s dirty player!dilf boyfriend!toji who, for the first time, trusts someone other than his best friend—his future wife, you.

nfl’s dirty player!dilf boyfriend!toji who, every time you kiss the scar on his lip that he hates—the one that reminds him of his horrible family—can’t help but wonder what he did to deserve someone like you.

nfl’s dirty player!dilf boyfriend!toji who, at every game, watches you and Megumi cheering from the front row and silently vows never to lose—on the field or in life.

nfl’s dirty player!dilf husband!toji who finally made you officially Megumi’s mother and his wife.

nfl’s dirty player!dilf husband!toji who posts the third photo on his Instagram, and it’s a picture from your wedding with you and Megumi.

nfl’s dirty player!dilf husband!toji who, during your first family vacation at the end of the season, watches you and Megumi playing in the ocean and realizes he’s no longer haunted by his past. All he sees now is the perfect family he’s built.

all rights belong to the @moonlitwitchdaisy do not copy, reproduce, or translate my work.

toji art by @sso_s_

divider by @cafekitsune

[folklvrsworld]

between the books ♡

pairing: harry james potter x fem!reader

warnings: smut, unprotected sex, kissing, swearing/cussing, slightly spying

summary: reader is doing assignments in the library when she feels a pair of eyes watching her, harry decided to distract her and get her mind off of school for a hot minute

song: collide - justin skye, tyga

-------------------------------------------------------

Being a sixth year doesn't mean you can relax. Yes, we do have a lot more free time, but those free times are mostly used for doing homework, which the professors gave a lot, or studying for N.E.W.T. exams that we will have to do in our seventh year.

I was in the library, scribbling down answers for my defence against the dark arts homework, while constantly switching books. The library wasn't empty that day, but it wasn't full either. As I was writing, I felt like someone was watching me. I looked around, but no one was looking at my direction.

I shrugged it off and continued on what I was doing. I finally finished my homework and I closed the books, before putting them back in the right shelves. As I was returning the last book, I felt a presence behind me and before I could turn around, I felt someone kiss my neck.

"Harry..." I giggled quitely while turning around to see the raven haired boy standing in front of me.

"Took you long enough to notice me." he grinned and pecked my lips slowly.

I kissed him back and pulled away with a raised eyebrow, "What do you mean?"

"I've been watching you for the past ten minutes, I thought you would notice me, but you were very focused on your homework." he chuckled, kissing me again.

"I knew I felt someone was watching me." I said in between kisses, "Now we really shouldn't make out here, I have homework to do."

He groaned, "Oh come on, it's time for you to have a little break. What d'you say?" he smiled while running his hands up and down my waist.

I gulped and stared at him in the eyes, he wasn't wrong, I do need a little break. I've been doing homework for the past three hours, my fingers were tired from writing, my brain was tired from thinking, I needed a distraction.

"Fine.." I finally said, earning a big grin from him before he pinned me to the bookshelf and kissed my neck, "W-Wait...Here?!"

He pulled away and shrugged, "Why not? If you're comfortable with it, of course."

I reminded myself that we were on the back of the library, the section where no one really comes to, so if we were to do it here, it would be somewhat safe. We just have to be quiet.

"Okay...We have to be quiet though."

He chuckled, "You mean you have to be quiet, princess." he smirked as his hand started to go under my skirt, "Let me take care of you, yeah? I know you're tired, you don't have to do anything."

His words gave me butterflies on my stomach. Sex with him was always either gentle and sweet, rough and kinky, or lusty and passionate. Him being cute and gentle was always my favorite one.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and stroked the back of his neck before leaning in to kiss him, as our lips collided and moved in sync, his hand made its way to my underwear. He stroked my clit through the fabric making me gasp and  have goosebumps from head to toe.

"Shh, relax. I'll be gentle." he muttered through the kiss as he felt the wetness on the underwear, he fiddled with the fabric at first, before slowly taking it off of me.

When it was off, he kept it in his pocket and started to trail his thumb over my clit. I shuddered at his touch and he did it over and over again, "Can you tell me what you want, princess?"

I nearly come undone hearing his words, but I managed to look him in the eyes while saying, "Touch me...Please, Harry..."

He smiled and pecked my lips before slowly entering a finger in, while still caressing my clit with his thumb. I held back a moan as I closed my eyes and bit my bottom lip.

"Merlin, you're so wet." he groaned quitely as he went in and out with his finger, and not long after, he added a second finger.

I threw my head back to the bookshelf and couldn't help but let out a little gasp, he started moving faster and faster, it was getting really hard to hold back my moans. When he added a third finger, he knew I was about to moan, because he slammed his lips onto mine.

"F-Fuck..." I moaned quitely through the kiss, his fingers moving in and out frantically, I pulled away and gasped for air.

Suddenly, I felt the knot in my stomach forming, my body was starting to shake, I was close. Harry seemed to realize as he stopped for a second to rest his fingers before going in and out in a frantic pace, his thumb stroking my clit.

"Come for me, baby." he said while unbuttoning my shirt and squeezing my boobs gently.

Not wasting another moment, I bit back a moan as I felt my body completely let go. I let out little whimpers of pleasure as my body jerk and shake a little from the force of the orgasm. When I've relaxed, he gently pulled his fingers out and licked them clean.

"Good girl." he smiled at me and kissed me, letting me taste myself on his tongue, "Do you want more or was that enough for you, my love?"

I panted heavily, still recovering from the orgasm, and looked at him and his bulge. I knew I would have to really fight myself to not moan if we go further, but my body needed him. Badly.

"You deserve some too, Harry. Not just me." I smiled while fumbling with his pants, he raised an eyebrow before smirking lightly.

He understood what I wanted so he quickly took of his pants and underwear, while I completely took off my shirt, leaving me only in my skirt and bra. He picked me up and made me straddle him before taking one of my boobs into his mouth.

I moaned quitely as I tug his hair and let out a sigh of pleasure. He continued sucking on my breast while playing with the other one, before pulling away and looking at me in the eyes, "You're the most beautiful person I've ever met, Y/N."

My body instantly was filled with euphoria hearing that, my cheeks went red as I smiled at him and kissed him. He kissed me back with tongue as he gave his dick a few strokes before gently and slowly entering me.

"O-Oh, fuck...." I pulled away from the kiss and moaned, with our foreheads still touching.

He breathed heavily and continued to thrust himself deeper. When he's fully in me, he paused for a second to take a deep breath, before slowly moving in and out.

"H-Harry..." I rested my hand on his shoulder and clawed his back, we were only getting started and we were already such a moaning mess.

"Y-You feel so good, Merlin..." he moaned, squeezing my ass as he continued his rapid movement.

We were looking into each other's eyes as he moved in and out of me. Both of us sweating and breathing heavily, euphoria and pleasure feeling both our bodies. It wasn't until we heard someone talking that we knew someone was in the shelf next to ours.

"No, that's not the one I'm looking for. Maybe it's in the next shelf."

I widened my eyes and mouthed to Harry, "We're the next shelf!"

He was about to pull out of me but before he could do anything, another voice was heard, "Wait, here it is. Nevermind, we don't have to go to the other shelf, Celia. I got it."

We both took a deep breath of relief and waited for them to leave, when they did, he looked at me and smirked, "Now, where were we?" he started moving in and out of me again. 

Not so long after, he thrusted deep inside me, hitting my g-spot. I had to bury my face on the crook of his neck to hold myself from screaming out of pleasure. I was in absolute bliss. His thrust became faster and harder by the second.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck baby..." I whimpered into his neck, my body jerking from the force of his thrust.

He stroked my back reassuringly and eagerly kissed my neck to calm me down, "Shh, I know, sweetheart. I know."

He started hitting my g-spot over and over again, my body was jerking and shaking from the amount of pleasure I was getting. Little gasps and moans coming out of my mouth, as I feel the knot on my stomach forming again.

"I-I'm close, Harry..." I gasped and my legs tightened the grip on his waist.

He nodded his head and groaned, while pulling away from my neck after successfully making a hickey there, "Me too. Oh fucking hell, love.."

His movement suddenly became fast and hard, he was trying to reach both of our orgasms. My mouth was hung open in a silent scream, he was gasping for air and watching me slowly come building up to my release.

"Beautiful. So fucking beautiful."

With his words, I come undone. I tried my best to moan quitely, as my body convulsed and my thighs shake. I saw stars and I couldn't feel anything else except for pleasure. I never wanted it to end. I was having uncontrollable spams. It was the hardest orgasm I've ever had.

A second after my release, he had his. He buried his face into my chest as he groaned and released inside me. I felt his hot liquid filling me up, making me shudder and jerk slightly. As we were both coming down from our high, he stroked my stomach gently to calm me down, and I stroked his hair.

When we both have relaxed, we looked at each other and couldn't help but smile. He pulled out of me slowly and set me down on my feet, I trembled but I quickly leaned against the shelf so I don't fall down.

"Did you enjoy it, my love?" he said out of breath, while moving a strand of hair from my face.

I nodded my head vigorously and chuckled, "Every second of it, darling." I smiled, "God, I really needed that. Homework has been stressing me out lately."

He smiled and kissed my forehead, "I noticed, princess." he took out my underwear from his pocket and gave it to me, "We should dress up before anyone sees us."

We quickly tidied ourselves up. We made ourselves look like we did not just fuck the shit out of each other as much as we could. I fixed him a bit and he did the same for me, before we both walk away from the shelf hand in hand.

I quickly gathered my stuff that was still on the table before walking out of the library with him, "That was one of the craziest things I've ever done."

He chuckled and shrugged, "Hey, everyone does crazy things from time to time. But you didn't regret it, did you?" he said as he put a bit of my hair at the front, to hide my hickey.

I smiled up at him and shook my head, "Not one bit, Harry."

[darlingshane]

Dumb & Poetic

Michael Berzatto x F!Reader

Summary: Michael and you cannot communicate anymore without screaming at each other, but you've managed to keep that out of the workplace. Except for today. Your argument reaches a boiling point, and you have a big blowout in the kitchen in front of everyone. You end up apologizing to each other at the end of the day in the only way you know how to.

CW: +18, explicit, heavy angst, complicated relationships in the workplace, smut, vaginal sex, hate sex, making out, misogynistic comments.

Word Count: 2,2k

— Links: AO3 // Michael Masterlist

The kitchen is on fire, and it's not because everyone is working their asses off. It's only because of the heated argument you're having with Michael.

If your hands weren’t busy with the sandwich you’re making, you would definitely close your fist and sock him in the face. You don’t condone violence, but right now, he's earning himself a good punch. Breaking his nose could be the only thing that would stop him from relentlessly nagging at you while you work. There's fire in your knuckles already, itching to hit something. Anger is really starting to fester in your stomach as he keeps yapping in your ear about nonsense. You give him one more minute before you either swing your fist or quit altogether. It'd be pretty funny to leave him in the lurch with the show full of people anxiously waiting for their food. You're understaffed, overworked, and lacking better management. He knows it, you know it, everyone and their mother in the neighborhood knows it. And yet, Michael refuses to listen to reason. The only thing he loves listening to is himself talking.

If you had other options, you’d certainly drop what you’re doing and walk right out the door. It'd take you to be as much of an asshole as he is to just leave him stranded today. Unfortunately, you can’t afford the luxury of quitting this job.

Turning heads on your way, you yell at each other, going back and forth between everyone working tiredly on the tight kitchen space. It's not unusual for you to fight, but today there's a time bomb ticking that holds something inside more complicated than any of you can understand.

You knew mixing business and pleasure was a mistake. Yet you jumped, eyes closed. It serves you right, you're hitting your head against the bottom of the pool for not following your gut. You knew Michael was trouble, also your boss, and that didn't stop you from getting into bed with him.

Now everything is a mess. You can't communicate without screaming at each other. All the back and forth between being together and apart has burned the last bridge between you and Michael, and there's nothing you can do to fix it when he's not willing to do his part in helping you.

“Orders are piling up. You either move out of the way, or join the party. So help me God, Michael.” You throw your knife with disdain into the sink before you do something you might regret.

“You still haven’t answered my question. Why did you change the menu without telling me?”

“I tried! I called you ten times, and you never picked up. And I didn’t change the menu. I just added a special for the weekend to try it out. See, it’s working.” You use your hand to point at the kitchen window crowded by heads on the other side. “You said you were leaving for two days, and you were gone for over a week. You think that’s normal, to go on a bender and leave us to fend for ourselves? You got orders, bills, vendors to deal with… You're being fucking irresponsible. Has anyone told you that? ”

“Give me a damn break. You have no idea what I have to deal with. You've been working here two days and act like they own the place. Who the fuck you think you are?”

“I've been here two years, Michael! Two fucking years carrying your sorry ass around. You’ll be lost without me, asshole!”

“I'd be lost without you? That's rich.” He scoffs loudly. “I taught you everything you know.”

Now it's your time to snort. “You showed me how to make your stupid sandwiches. It's not like you taught me how to cure cancer. You should be grateful I care enough to do something about it.”

“It wasn’t your place! You added chicken to my menu. Beef. We serve beef.” He points at the logo on the shirt he's wearing. “Can't you read, sweetheart? If we start serving chicken, people are gonna get confused.”

You roll your eyes intently.

“I told you, it's just for the weekend, Mr. Beef.” You have to hold yourself back from throwing the wrapped sandwich in your hands at him.

“Yo, cousin, since when we do chicken specials.” Richie walks in, protesting, from the front of the shop.

“Ask the smartass here. Thinks she knows better than all of us.”

“Well, I don't know about smart, but she certainly has a good ass.” Richie laughs.

“Oh, look at your other half agreeing with you. What a surprise! That's sexual harassment, by the way, Richard. And you're late, as usual.”

“Take it to the police, sweetheart.”

You feel like you're the one who's taking this place more seriously than both of them. Perhaps you shouldn't even try anymore. If Michael doesn't care enough to make this place better, why should you? You're sick of busting your ass for nothing. You should just take a step back and let him drive this hole further into the ground.

Done with arguing with someone who doesn't even listen, you turn around and go start on the next order.

“Hey, I'm not done talking to you.” He, of course, follows behind you.

“Well, I am. Stop wasting my fucking time.”

“Not until you apologize for going over my head and changing things around without consulting me.”

You almost burst into laughter.

“The only one who needs to issue an apology is you, Michael. Not me. I've done nothing but bringing life into this fucking dark hole you've created. You're just too obtuse to see that.”

“You've got some fucking nerve. And who do you think is paying for all the chicken you ordered? Did you get a new vendor?”

“I know a guy. He got me a discount on the first order.”

“Really? Vendors I know don't usually do that. Did you have to suck his dick or something? Cause that's the only—”

He can't finish his sentence because before you know it, the back of your hand is swiftly flying across his face. All that vitriol that was boiling inside, begging to get out, ends plastered on his cheek that quickly turns red. Your knuckles hurt from hitting his jaw, but it was worth it.

Suddenly, you notice almost everyone in the kitchen is looking at the two of you, caught in the middle of the space in a standoff.

It takes him a second to tell everyone to go back to work. You can see him fuming, but he doesn't respond or retaliate to your aggression.

As much as he deserved it, you almost regret it immediately. At least you got him to shut up for the time being. You take a ten-minute break and finish the rest of your shift without more altercations or Michael pestering you, thankfully. You're not sure if you want to come back tomorrow. You're done with his shit. It's not worth it anymore. You'll have figured out something else, cause this is never going to get better, and today was proof of that.

Almost everyone is gone when you decide to have a word with Michael after closing.

“Hey,” you say, standing by the open door to his office as he looks up from the pile of papers on his desk. “I'm going to take a couple of days off from my vacation days.”

“Yeah, I think that'd be best.” He agrees.

“Are you going to fire me?”

“It has crossed my mind.”

“Well, are you?”

“Sit down” He motions at the empty chair while he stands up to close the door behind you.

“I'm not sitting down. I'm tired of arguing with you and I wanna go home. Just tell me, Michael. No hard feelings. We'll go our separate ways, and you'll never have to deal with me again. ”

“I'm not firing you, okay? Please sit. I have something to say.”

Begrudgingly, you sigh and sit in the chair with your arms crossed while he leans on the edge of the desk.

“Look, today got out of hand, and I'm sorry for my part. I shouldn't have said that.”

“It was way out the line. But I shouldn't have slapped you, either.”

“Did it feel good to slap me?” his lips pull up at the corners.

“Maybe a little.”

You both smile for a moment, but you know there's more to say.

“I appreciate you helping here, but you can't make decisions like that when I'm gone. You should have told me first.”

“You never listen, Michael. This isn't something new. I've been telling you for months. This place needs to change, or you're going to lose it. I thought it meant something to you, but hell, what do I know? But don't worry, I'm butting out from now on. It's your business, do what you want with it.”

“I highly doubt you can do that, sweetheart. You and I both know you won’t be able to stay out of it. You just love being a pain in my ass too much.”

No, you're done for sure. If he can't at least meet you halfway, you're done trying. You can't fix this place cause you can't fix him. And that's the main issue here.

“Believe what you want, Michael.” You stand up to leave, but he's surely not even close to being done with you.

“Wait, there's something else I gotta say.”

“What?”

He steps closer in your direction, and you almost flinch when he brings his hand up to touch your face. Sighing, you let him cup your face while he leans in to kiss your mouth. It's so puzzling the effect he has on you. It’s dumb and poetic. He keeps fucking with your head like it’s some kind of fetish, and you keep letting him for no reason other than you can’t help but caring for him. You wish you didn’t, but you do love him more than you’d like to admit.

“Your lips are moving, but I don't hear any talking,” you mumble against his kiss.

“Hm, I wasn't done yet,” he licks his lips and then the tip of his tongue traces the shape of your mouth before sliding past your lips to do his talking. You don't give in so easily to his dirty antics. He's going to have to earn it.

It takes you a moment to respond to the bidding of his tongue that moves slowly against yours, begging you to kiss him back.

You should know better by now that this won't end well. This is a path you've walked many times before, and every time you end up regretting ever stepping onto it. You should duck, run, kick him in the balls, but you’re far too deep into the mind-numbing rhythm of his tongue that casts an impossible spell on you to do anything but argue with your tongue. As the heat rises, the hunger of your lips locking becomes unbearably hot to handle. You can barely breathe when you notice his hands roaming all over your body, claiming it as if it was his.

“God, I hate you so much,” you grunt into the kiss, pulling slightly from his mouth to see the vicious red that has plumbed his lips.

“I hate you more, baby,” he huffs, sucking your bottom lip between his teeth as he presses his crotch between your legs. “That’s how much I despise you.”

“Not as much as I do.” You undo the buttons of your jeans before grabbing his hand and shoving it into your panties to make him feel how soaked you are already.

Dark eyes lock with yours as he viciously massages your whole pussy. Before you know, you’re turning your back on him, and bending over his desk, pulling your pants and underwear down so he can fuck you from behind.

There’s no time wasted, as you brace your elbows to the table, he smoothly buries his cock in your opening, collecting all your juices. He’s hard, and you're soft in all the right places for him to thrust firmly without hurting you. His hands grip your ass while the pace of his hips quickly drive you out of your mind. You feel every stroke and thrust rippling through your body, kindling a fire within your core. You glance over your shoulder to see him darkly staring at you before smacking your ass with his palm.

“How do you like that now, huh?” He snarls, slapping your ass a second time harder, earning a moan out of you. “Yeah, I know that’s how you like it, sweetheart.”

You then hang your head and let him drive you closer to the edge. You can feel his cock twitching inside you as you send one of your hands between your legs to touch your clit.

“What? You got nothing to say now?” He leans forwards to grunt in your ear. “Good. You look prettier with your mouth shut.”

“Fuck you, asshole,” you moan as his hand follow the path of yours to helps you take care of your clit as you both nearly touch that last final line.

With the help of his fingers, and those final firm erratic thrusts, you quickly come undone, letting your walls flutter around him, bringing him down with you. He spills himself inside, holding on to you as you and him are momentarily taken by that jolt of bliss that ripples from his body to yours and vice versa.

— credits: divider by @bernardsbendystraws

[starsenha]

[10] FIRST IMPRESSIONS - progress

synopsis: riki was a big fan of your group Devilish, but when he met you for the first time, he made a very bad first impression and now you hated him. rumors started to spark saying how you hated each other and to calm the rumors, the company decided to make you two hosts a variety show together for two months. wc: 1,3k

The third episode of the variety show had been the longest filming day yet, and honestly, you couldn't take it anymore. You and Riki had spent hours interviewing Meovv, a newly debuted girl group that came to promote their first comeback. The group's members were bright and bubbly, but their energy exhausted you, as well ad the fake smile you had plastered on your face.

You sat across from them, maintaining your polite and attentive demeanor. Riki was also struggling with their energy. As soon as the director yelled, "That's a wrap," you stood, thanked the staff and the Meovv members with a small bow, and quietly slipped out of the studio. Riki noticed but decided not to say anything, choosing to stay back and what with some of the crew.

Behind the studio, you found a quiet corner surrounded by tall trees where you could feel the cool evening air. Sighing, you leaned against the wall, your head tilted back as you closed your eyes. You loved what you did, but sometimes, it took just too much energy.

About ten minutes later, you heard footsteps. Opening your eyes, you found Riki standing a few feet away, hands stuffed in his hoodie pockets.

"Figured I'd find you here," he said causally.

"You followed me?" you raised an eyebrow.

"Followed is a strong word. I just....guessed," he said with a sheepish grin. "You looked like you needed a break."

You turned your gaze back to the darkening sky. "It's been a long day."

He leaned against the wall next to you but was careful to give you space. "Yeah, those girls have endless energy. I don't know how they do it."

"They're probably running on adrenaline," you said, your tone soft. "They're still new. Everything's exciting for them."

Riki nodded. "True. But I don't think I've ever been that energetic, even when I debuted."

That earned a small huff of amusement from you, which surprised Riki, but he decided not to comment on it and thought it was the moment.

"Can...Can we talk for a bit?" he asked, shifting his weight from one foot to the other.

You sighed a bit, "Sure, sunbaenim."

He winced at the formality but didn't comment on it. Instead, he took a step closer. "I just...wanted to talk. About, uh, stuff."

"Stuff?"

"Yeah, like..." he scratched the back of his neck, clearly struggling to find the right words. "Like how you probably don't like me very much."

You didn't respond immediately. "I wouldn't say that, sunbaenim. I respect you as an artist and as my senior."

"Okay, but like," Riki said, his voice almost pleading, "you definitely don't like me. And i get why. I've been...kind of a disaster." You didn't deny it, which made Riki laugh quietly. “But, uh, I think part of the reason you don’t like me goes back to that first time we met. At the music show.”

Your eyes narrowed slightly, but your tone remained neutral. "What about it?"

"You remember, right?" Riki asked, glancing at you. "It was, like, two years ago. Your group had just debuted."

You nodded slowly, your gaze turning to the dark sky. "You told me I was an 'okay' dancer." Your voice was calm, almost sounding unbothered.

He winced at your words. "Yeah. That. I...I didn't mean it like that," he said quickly, his words stumbling over each other. "I swear. I dodn't think you were just 'okay'. I thought you were amazing. I just-"

“Then why did you say it?” you interrupted, your tone sharper now. “If you thought I was amazing, why didn’t you say that?”

Riki ran a hand through his hair, his nervous energy making him shift again. “Because I was nervous! Like, really nervous. I was a fan, and I was so freaked out about meeting you that I just… messed it up. I didn’t know how to act, so I said something stupid.”

You turned to face him fully, your arms still crossed. “You were nervous?”

“Yes!” Riki said, nodding emphatically. “I mean, you were—are—this incredible dancer, and I didn’t want to sound like I was just fanboying. I wanted to look cool, but instead of being cool, I made it worse and came off as a jerk.”

You stared at him for a moment, your expression softening ever so slightly. “So, you didn’t mean it?”

“Not even a little bit,” Riki admitted. “You’re one of the most talented dancers I’ve ever seen, and I’ve thought that since day one. I just… suck at expressing myself sometimes.”

You were silent for a moment, your gaze searching his face for any sign of insincerity. When you finally spoke, your tone was quieter. “Why are you telling me this now, sunbaenim?”

“Because we’re stuck working together for seven weeks,” Riki said with a small, self-deprecating laugh. “And I don’t want you to hate me the whole time. I’d like for us to at least get along. Or, you know, tolerate each other.”

“Thank you for explaining,” You said finally, your tone softer but still measured. “I… appreciate the clarification.”

“You’re welcome,” Riki replied, grinning slightly. “Does this mean I’ve earned a little less of the death glare on set?”

You raised an eyebrow, but there was a glint of amusement in your eyes. “Don’t push your luck.”

Riki chuckled, running a hand through his hair. “Noted. But, seriously, I’m glad we talked. I was starting to think you had me on some kind of blacklist.”

You tilted your head slightly, pretending to think. “I wouldn’t call it a blacklist. More like… a warning list.”

“Wow,” Riki said, clutching his chest dramatically. “And here I thought I was climbing my way into your good graces.”

“You’re at the bottom of the list,” You replied coolly, though your lips twitched as if suppressing a smile.

Riki leaned back against the wall, looking up at the sky. “You know, this reminds me of something.”

“What?” You asked, curious despite yourself.

“Well,” he began, a mischievous grin forming, “it’s like one of those rom-coms where the leads start off hating each other, but then they end up being best friends—or more.”

You stared at him, your expression deadpan. “This isn’t a rom-com, Riki-sunbae.”

“Riki,” he corrected, glancing at her hopefully. “Just Riki.”

You didn’t respond immediately, and he continued, trying to break the silence. “Besides, if this were a rom-com, I’d have some dramatic rain scene to win you over, and I left my umbrella at home.”

You blinked at him for a moment, and then, to both your surprise, you laughed. It wasn’t just a small chuckle but a genuine laugh that lit up your face for a brief moment.

Riki froze, his eyes wide as he stared at you. “Wait… did you just laugh? Like, actually laugh?”

Your laughter trailed off, and you looked almost as surprised as he did. “What? No. That wasn’t—”

“No, no, you totally laughed,” Riki said, pointing at you triumphantly. “I made Yn laugh. Someone call Dispatch. This is breaking news.”

You rolled her eyes, but the corner of your mouth twitched upward again. “Don’t let it go to your head, Riki.”

“Hey, you called me Riki. No ‘sunbaenim.’ Progress!”

You blinked, realizing your slip. “It was a momentary lapse. Don’t get used to it.”

“Too late,” Riki said, beaming. “You’ve already made my day.”

You sighed but didn’t correct yourself, your tone more teasing than annoyed. “You’re so easily pleased.”

“Only when it comes to you,” Riki replied, his tone light but sincere.

You glanced at him, your expression softening for just a moment before you pushed off the wall. “We should head back. It’s getting late.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Riki said, following you but unable to hide the triumphant grin on his face. “Just don’t trip on the way. I’m not catching you again today.”

You gave him a side-eye that was more amused than annoyed. “You’re really pushing it.”

“Maybe,” Riki said, walking beside you. “But I think I’m finally getting somewhere.”

previous / m.list / next

TAGLIST: @pkjay @d-dilemma @heartheejake @lunaritex @dreeki @inishij @rikirritated @whoiss4m @sleepyxxhead @aanniikkaa @right-person-wrong-time @aespaqq @starry-eyed-bimbo @nerdywitchcrown @yuniesluv @lovestruck-sky @ariluvssssss100 @rei4sunoo @wildtigerlili @jakef3ver @seungminsapuppy @kittsnewera @regalfox @rairaiblog @pairinnn

[jpmarvel90]

Always the Bridesmaid

Masterlist Scarlett Masterlist

Word Count: 7236

Relationship: Scarlett x ReaderPugh

Summary: Y/n and Scarlett have become close friends since they met whilst Y/n was working as her little sister's manager. Y/n has feelings for Scarlett but has firmly been friendzoned and has to watch on as Scarlett makes her way through endless men and women.

Y/n's POV:

I've known Scarlett for the last 4 years. I meet her through my little sister Florence, and we've been great friends since. After doing my business degree, I became Florence's manager. We didn't know if it would work, but Flo wanted someone that she could trust, and she knew that I would always do what was best for her.

It's ended up working out really well and we've got a great working relationship that doesn't affect our personal one. It was through Black Widow that I first met Scarlett and we hit it off really quickly and became best friends. Flo would always laugh, saying that if she couldn't find me on set, she would just need to look for Scarlett and we'd be together.

Spending so much time with Scar led to inevitable feelings to develop. She's naturally flirty and I forget that sometimes. Unfortunately, that just made the feelings grow quicker. Flo worked it out pretty early on and always tried to convince me to tell her. But just as I would work up the courage, she would be with someone else.

Scarlett is openly bi, so there was never a worry about her not liking women, but it seemed that it just meant there were more people for her to end up with. It never got in the press, but Scar liked to sleep around. If she wasn't in a relationship, she was having one night stands with people on nights out or after movie premieres. Something I had a front row seat too which made my heart ache.

The closer friends we became, the more times I was invited to be her plus one. Though I was never the person that was lucky enough to go home with her. 9 times out of ten, I would be making my own way home as Scarlett would have her driver take her and that night's conquest to her place.

Thankfully, Flo and I are in LA for a few weeks, meaning that I get a break from seeing Scarlett. Which actually is a double edged sword. I love spending time with her. Our friendship is one of the most important ones that I have. But it also is becoming quite painful to be around her. She's recently out of a relationship, which means her one night stands are increasing in number. So this time with my sister on a rare break has been nice.

"What are you thinking about?" Flo asks me from her sun lounger. We're currently sat by her pool. When we're in LA, I live with Flo. I have my own place in New York, but not being on the same money as Flo, means owning multiple properties isn't an option. But Flo is a great sister and instantly offered for me to live with her when we were both in LA. There's only two years between us and we get on really well. We're not just sisters, we're best friends.

"Not much, just what I need to get sorted for Dune. When we're back in New York, I need to finalise the contracts with the team." I respond, earning an eye roll from Flo. "You're always in work mood. Relax a little." She huffs, adjusting in her lounger to turn and look at me. "Besides, I was sure you were thinking of Scarlett, you always have the same look when you do." She teases me, poking at my cheek. I hit her hand away. "I do not!" I glare at her.

"You do! It's a mix between complete adoration and pain. You're like a brooding teen from a teen drama." She insists. "I do not brood." I bite back. "I still think you should tell her." She shares, turning to lie on her back, closing her eyes. "We've talked about this. She seems quite happy with the lifestyle she has at the moment." I respond and she nods in agreement. "She has taken this latest breakup harder than usual." She observes.

"I think what I actually need is to find someone for myself. Maybe you could help?" I admit, causing Flo to shoot up in her seat. "Really?" She asks, lifting her sunglasses onto her head. "Yeah, desperate times and all that." I joke. "Oh, I actually have the perfect person. I should set you up with Hailee." She thinks excitedly. I roll my eyes as she starts excitedly rambling. I might end up regretting this. "She's in Europe for a month but when she's back I'll talk to her." Flo eventually comes to a decision, and I agree, knowing that it'll be easier.

Flo and I have a nice few weeks off in LA, It was good to get some sun and relax, although she's right. I do struggle in switching off from work, so I did spend some time making sure everything was in order for her.

Our time in LA was ending with us attending the Antman and Wasp premiere. Flo was attending with Charlie whilst I had the pleasure of attending with Scarlett. She had asked me not long after her break up as she was meant to go with Colin. She didn't want to go alone and basically begged me to go with her. And me being a sucker for her puppy dog sad eyes, I agreed.

As she was just attending the premiere there was a lot less faff than there can be when it's a movie she's in. When I attended the Marriage Story premiere with her, we were getting ready hours before and being briefed so much by her team. I much prefer it like this. She'll pick me up and I can just hang back whilst she gets her picture taken and does a couple of interviews. The rest of the time we'll be together and get to enjoy the movie.

"Wow. Y/n, you're looking beautiful." Scarlett greets me as I make sure the house is locked up. I spin around and see her resting against the side of the car in the most incredible black suit. Her cleavage is on show, and it hugs her in all the right places. I gulp seeing her looking incredible. "I think you need to look in a mirror. You look sensational Scar." I tell her as I approach the car. "Thanks babe." She smiles at me, wrapping her arms around me. There goes my fluttering heart.

"Let's get going, shall we?" She asks, holding the door open for me. "Thank you, Johansson." I smirk at her, giving her a wink and letting my hand run along her bare arm. I'm sure I see her shudder under my touch. She's frozen a little, before she shakes her head and gets in the car the other side. "I missed you." She says, turning to pout at me. "I was only gone for three weeks." I laugh at her childlike face. "Three weeks too long without my bestie." She sighs. That causes a pang in my heart when I remember that's all she sees me as. Her friend.

"Seems like you had plenty of company to distract you." I point out, causing her to drop her gaze. "Yeah, I took the breakup a little harder than I thought and let myself go a little too far. I'm ready to focus on me for a bit." She says a little embarrassed. Feeling guilty for pointing it out, I reach over and take her hand. "It's ok to be hurt. You just need to find a healthy way to vent." I reassure her, giving her a warm smile when she finally looks up to me.

"What would I do without you Y/n?" She asks, a sadness in her eyes. "Suffer endlessly no doubt." I tease, making her laugh. "You're right there. You better not leave me." She lightly threatens. "Unfortunately, I think you're stuck with me." I chuckle. She lifts my hand to her lips and presses a kiss to my knuckles. "Good." She smiles.

The premiere goes well, and I really enjoy the movie. I'm a huge Marvel geek so I understand how lucky I am to get to see the movie at the world premiere. I watched on as Scarlett did everything she needed to. People were used to seeing me with her. Our friendship was well documented, but they knew it was a friendship and nothing more, so we didn't get inundated with rumours.

We make our way to the after party and we have a great time dancing and drinking. Flo and Charlie are in a world of their own and I smile seeing my sister so happy. Scarlett is quick to drag me to the dance floor and her hands find my hips, swaying us to the music. Her touches are extremely flirty as she dances close to me, her body pressed into mine.

After some time dancing, I feel a tap on my shoulder. "We're heading home" Flo tells me, as Charlie has his arms wrapped around her, placing kisses to her neck. "Stop." She laughs, playfully pushing him away. "Have fun. I'll see if I can crash at Scarlett's" I tell her, knowing it's the first time she's seen Charlie in a few weeks. "Thanks. I love you Y/n/n. Stay safe." She tells me, pulling me into a tight hug. "You too. Safe sex is good sex!" I shout after them, earning a middle finger from Flo.

I hear Scarlett laughing next to me. "You two have a great relationship." She observes and I nod. "Yeah, I'm pretty lucky she's my little sister." I smile. "I'm going to run to the loo and grab some more drinks. Do you want one?" I ask and she nods. "Please, I'll have whatever you're having." She responds. I nod and leave her to continue dancing whilst I make my way to the loo.

There's quite the queue at both the bathroom and the bar. But I eventually manage to grab us both a cosmo and turn around to rejoin Scarlett. I look around the dance floor and my heart drops when I see her lip locked with a red headed woman. I don't know why I'm surprised. This happens more often than not.

When she pulls away for air, she notices me, and I plaster on a fake smile. "Y/n/n! You're back. This is..." She greets me with a big smile, turning to the woman. "Kacey." The redhead introduces herself to me. "Oh, thanks for these. You're ok getting another right?" She asks, taking the drinks from my hand and passing one to Kacey. "Uh yeah. No worries." I respond, turning back to the bar knowing I've lost any attention from her for the rest of the night.

I go to the bar and order a shot of vodka, that I down pretty quickly, and then grab a beer. I don't know why I let this get to me so much. I know this is what she's like. I need to just move one. Hopefully when Hailee is back in the US something might go right for me.

"Y/n!" I hear my name being shouted. I turn around and see Scarlett with her lipstick smudged and a big smile on her face. Her hand tightly grasped around Kacey's. "We're heading home. You ok to getting back on your own?" She asks me with a drunk glaze to her eyes. "Yeah sure." I respond, downing the rest of my beer and leaving before anything else can be said. I'm done with this.

I head outside and order an uber before finding a hotel nearby that has a vacancy. Luckily there is one not too far away, though my bank balance isn't going to thank me! Whilst I'm waiting for my cab, I see Scarlett drag Kacey into the back of her car, laughing the whole time.

That night in the hotel, I started to re-evaluate my life. I need to either move on from this stupid crush or remove myself from the situation. It's a hard decision as I love my friendship with Scarlett, and I don't think that I want to lose that. But in my current state, I don't think I can keep seeing her like this. I come to the decision that I'm going to take a bit of time away from her. I can use work as an excuse and hopefully get the chance to meet Hailee and see where things go.

I have a difficult night and only manage to get a couple of hours sleep. But I don't rush home, wanting Flo to be able to have the most time with Charlie. I don't have to check out until 11, so I spend it chilling in the room. Not having a phone charger, my phone died during the night, and I sigh. I only have the dress I was wearing last night. I call down to reception and ask if they can book me a cab to take me home. I just want to wash the night off me.

Reception calls when the cab is here, and I make my way down as quickly as possible to avoid the stares I'm bound to get when I walk out with smudged makeup and a crinkled dress. I slip into the back of the cab and rest my head back against the headrest as the car rocks along the road.

When I pull up at Flo's I thank the driver and head to the front door. But before I can open it, it swings open, and a body collides with mine. "Y/n/n. Where the hell have you been?" I teary Flo asks me. "I thought you knew I wasn't coming home last night so you and Charlie could have the place to yourself." I reply, unsure why she's so upset. "Yeah, you said you'd crash at Scarlett's. I tried calling you to see if you wanted to join us for breakfast, but it went straight to voicemail. Then when I called Scarlett, she said that you didn't go home with her." She starts to panic again so I pull her into me. "Sorry. I stayed in a hotel last night and my phone died." I explain. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to worry you." I tell her, guilt filling me. I should have messaged her last night to let her know.

"That's ok. I was just so worried when I couldn't get a hold of you. I thought something might have happened to you." She says a bit more calmly this time. She hugs me tightly again and we turn to head inside, but the harsh breaking of a car catches our attention. "Y/n! Thank God you're ok!" Scarlett says as she rushes out of the car, launching herself at me.

"When Flo called and said you hadn't come home and weren't answering your phone, I was so worried about you." She rambles out and I find it hard not to scoff. She had no concern about me getting home safely last night. "I'm fine." I respond a little too harshly and I see Flo raise an eyebrow at me. "Are you ok? Where were you?" She asks, taking my hands. The touch is making me uncomfortable, so I gently pull them away. "I stayed in a hotel. I had already agreed that Flo could have the house with Charlie as they hadn't seen each other in ages." I inform her. "Why didn't you tell me? You could have stayed with me." She says but I once again fight to hide the scoff.

"I was going to, but you were a bit distracted." I point out. "Oh." Scarlett says when the realisation hits. "Look, I'd really like to shower and get some sleep. I'm heading in now." I say, not wanting to be in this situation any longer. "Of course, Y/n/n. I'll make you some breakfast, you must be hungry." Flo smiles, sensing the tension. "I'll see you later Y/n/n." Scarlett calls after. I turn and give her a tight lipped smile as I continue to walk backwards. I see hurt flash across her face. But I brush it off, heading upstairs.

Once I'm showered and in some comfy clothes. I climb into bed, hoping to hide away for the day, but I don't get my wish as Flo appears at my door with a tray in her hands. She walks in and places the plate of fried goods in front of me. "You looked like you could do with something greasy!" She smiles, taking her seat next to me. "Thank Flossy." I smile, tucking in straight away.

"She did it again. Didn't she?" Flo asks giving me a sympathetic look. "Yeah, but it's not like it's a surprise." I reply, trying to play it down. "Seems odd after how she was talking about focusing on herself and taking a break from all that." She shares aloud. I just hum in response. "It's her life. She can do as she pleases Flo." I remind her. "But that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt you." She comforts me. "You're right. But today is the last time I'm going to let it affect me. I'm ready to move on from this. In fact, I was thinking that maybe I could stay here whilst you go back to New York. I can still work from here but it just gives me a bit of time to sort my head out." I suggest, hoping she agrees.

I watch her face to see what she's thinking. But I can't quite get a read on it. "Sure. Hailee will be back by then anyway so some time for you to get to know each other." She smiles, making me let out a sigh of relief.

We spend the rest of the day hanging out together with Charlie. They'll be flying out tomorrow to New York, so it's nice to have some time together before we're apart for a few weeks. Scarlett texts me a couple of times and I respond to be nice.

Scarly: So when do you get to New York? We should head for dinner to celebrate being reunited.

Y/n/n: I'm actually not flying back with Flo. I'm staying for some last minute work in LA for a few more weeks.

Scarly: Wait what? You didn't mention anything last night. We were meant to be reunited to take New York by storm.

Y/n: You were a little distracted last night. I'm sure you'll be fine until I get there next month.

My response is a little short and I feel bad. But I don't think I can keep up with the charade anymore. She's not too happy that I didn't tell her, but eventually stops complaining about it. She makes me promise to have a bestie weekend when I get home and I reluctantly agree. Hopefully by then, I'll be in a better place and can be a good friend to her without being hung up on her.

__________

The first few days in LA on my own were weird. I had always been around Flo and having this time working with her but from the other side of the country, is strange. But I soon get into a routine and start to focus on myself a bit more. I start going to the gym and eating better. I'm really starting to feel good about myself and the more days that pass the less I'm thinking of Scarlett.

Flo contacted me after being away for a week to inform me that Hailee is back in LA and would like to meet up. She shares my number with her, and I end up getting a text from her 5 minutes after hanging up from Flo. She works fast!

Over the next few weeks, I spend a lot of time with Hailee. She is so sweet and hilariously funny. I really enjoy spending time with her, and we've gone on some interesting dates. Flo is super excited as she gets the gossip from both sides and is even more excited when I tell her that Hailee will be coming to New York for a few weeks for work, so we arrange to all go out together.

Whilst Hailee and I are having lunch together at a local Italian, she looks up to me a little nervously. "Everything ok?" I ask her and she nods. "Yeah. I um. Just have a question for you." She stutters a little. I nod encouragingly, smiling to show her I'm listening. "Kevin Feige is setting up this charity gala in New York. There are loads of the cast from different Marvel movies attending. I was wondering if you would like to be my date?" She asks me through a wave of confidence.

"I would love to." I respond a little too quickly, but Hailee doesn't seem to care as her eyes go wide. "Really?!" She asks and I nod. "Yeah. I'd be stupid to say no to getting to turn up with a beautiful lady on my arm." I flirt, making her blush. "Amazing, I'll get my team to sort it all out." She says excitedly, reaching out to take my hand.

After extending my stay in LA for another week, I finally return to New York. I've kept in contact with Scarlett whilst I've been away, but she's been busy, helping me in creating the needed distance. I definitely feel like I'm in a better position to see her again. Although Hailee and I are only friends at the moment, she's brought a new happiness to my life and even if she's just a new friend, she's helped me more than she knows.

I'm only home for about 4 hours when there's a knock at my door. I know it's not Flo as she's out of town for a couple of days. But I'm also not surprised when I see Scarlett smiling excitedly, a bottle of wine in her hand. She instantly pulls me into a tight hug. "Thank God your home. You're never allowed to be gone for so long again." She tells me firmly, letting herself into my apartment, making her way into the kitchen and grabbing two glasses.

We spend the evening catching up and I can see how far I've come. Looking at Scarlett, I know there are some feelings still under the surface, but I know I'm on my way to getting over her. I actually enjoy myself, seeing that our friendship is intact and I hope that it continues that way.

"So, Y/n/n I was hoping you'd be my plus one for a charity Gala next week. I wanted to ask you earlier, but I also wanted to ask you face to face." She tells me with a smile, but it drops when she sees my frown. "Oh, I'm sorry. I'm actually already going with someone else." I tell her. "Oh, is Charlie not able to go with Flo?" She asks but I shake my head. "I'm actually going with Hailee." I tell her and I'm sure I see pain flash across her face.

"Steinfeld?" She asks and I nod. "Yeah, we've been getting to know each other in LA." I tell her. She gulps a little and forces a smile on her face. "Are you dating?" She questions. "Not really. Well, maybe kind of. We've just been spending time together. Flo introduced us." I explain. "Hmm. I'll be talking with her." She mumbles. I don't think she realises that she says that out loud, but I let it slide. "Well, at least I'll get to see you there." She says, forcing that fake smile again.

The rest of the night feels a little awkward. Is she unhappy that I'm unable to go with her. I mean, I'm only ever there for her until she finds the person that she wants to head home with. At least this time, I'll be with someone that wants me there with them entirely.

___________

The night of the gala comes around quickly. Hailee and I get ready together at my apartment as she doesn't have a property in New York. It's quite relaxed, even though there are about 10 strangers in my home, getting us, all made up for the night.

We meet with Flo and Charlie to go into the gala together. Hailee holds her arm out to me and I link with her. "Shall we." She smiles, scrunching up her nose at me. "After you Miss Steinfeld." I return. We take our time taking photos along the red carpet. It's strange being in the photos like this. Normally, I stand back as Scarlett has her photos taken. But Hailee has her arm tightly around me, only letting me go when her manager insists she needs solo photos.

As we reach the end of the carpet, I hear Scarlett's name being called and turn to see her walking down the red carpet on her own. She's killing it and the crowd are eating it up to see her going solo. I smile, seeing her doing so well, but turn back to Hailee, giving her my full attention.

When we get into the hall, we find our table and I see that Scarlett is sat next to me. Also on our table are Flo, Lizzie and Seb. As I'm pulling out Hailee's chair for her, I hear the familiar raspy voice from beside me. "Always the gentlewoman is Y/n." She smiles.

I turn and give her a hug in greeting. "You look lovely Scarlett." I tell her and she returns the compliment. "Have you met Hailee before?" I ask. "Very briefly, but it's lovely to see you again." She says, leaning down to give her a kiss on the cheek.

Dinner is actually really fun. There is live music through the night, an auction and a couple of speeches to talk about the cause they're supporting. We're having a good time on our table and the drinks are flowing. I notice that Scarlett is looking fiercely at Hailee and I. But each time I make eye contact, she smiles and lets the façade drop.

The last musical act of the night is Niall Horan. He's great but I see that Hailee becomes more uncomfortable. Then I remember that they broke up not too long ago. I lean into her and place my arm around her shoulder. "Are you ok?" I ask quietly and she nods. "Yeah. Just haven't seen him in a while." She admits. "Do you want a drink?" I ask and she nods. "Yeah, let's go." She smiles, taking my hand and leading me off to the bar. I can feel Scarlett's eyes on me as we walk away but I ignore it. Focusing on Hailee in this moment.

Whilst we're at the bar, I hear an Irish accent and Hailee freezes. She looks at me and I smile, taking an exaggerated breath which she copies. She then turns around and greets Niall. "This is Y/n." She introduces me after they have a short hug. "Pleasure to meet you." He smiles, holding his hand out to me. I take it and smile in return. "You too."

There is an awkward silence and I suddenly feel like I'm the odd one out. "Could we uh. Maybe talk?" Niall asks and Hailee stutters at the request, turning to look at me. "Go on, I'll take our drinks to the table." I tell her and she smiles gratefully. "Thanks Y/n." She replies, placing a kiss to my cheek and following Niall.

I return to the table and Flo looks at me with a confused look. "Where's Hailee?" She asks. "Uh. Niall wanted to talk to her." I inform her and she looks shocked. "Oh." Is all she says. "Yeah. Oh." I say back. There are clearly feelings still between them and I'm expecting the inevitable to happen.

"Where are the others?" I ask, not lingering on the subject of Hailee. "On the dance floor." She replies, pointing in their direction. Lizzie and Seb are dancing like idiots whilst Scarlett is dancing with a man I don't recognise. Probably her conquest for the night.

"Shall we join them?" She asks and I nod, downing my drink, wanting to dance with my sister. We join the others and Scarlett's eyes flick to me and then around us. I'm not sure what she's looking for, but whatever it is, makes her leave the arms of the mystery man to join us in a group dance.

I let myself go, not dwelling on the disaster that is my love life. In this moment, I'm having a great time dancing with everyone. It's nice actually having this time with Scarlett too. She's giving far more attention than she normally does. I wonder if Flo has told her the whole Hailee thing and she's feeling sorry for me.

My happiness doesn't last for long though when I feel a tap on my shoulder. I see Hailee with a guilty look on her face. She nods her head to the side of the dance floor, and I follow her. Feeling Flo and Scarlett's gaze on us. "I'm really sorry." Hailee rushes out but I stop her. "It's ok. You still have feelings for him." I answer for her. "H-how did you know?" She asks shocked. "I could see it. It's quite obvious." I chuckle. "Oh. I didn't mean for this to happen. I really do like you." She says but I can tell it's conflicted.

"It's really ok. We aren't together. It was nice being able to spend time with you." I reassure her, but it doesn't stop tears falling down her cheeks. "Why are you being so kind?" She asks. "There's nothing to be angry about. As long as you're happy, that's what matters." I respond, and she pulls me into a tight hug. "I'd love to still be friends with you. You've really brought some light to my life." She says, almost with a pleading look. "Friends it is." I smile, holding my hand out jokingly. She takes it and shakes it laughing. "Now go find your man." I instruct her.

She looks at me once more, almost like she's checking that I'm ok. When she sees what she's looking for, she turns around and I watch as she makes her way to Niall. Not feeling like staying around anymore, I head to find Flo, who's with Charlie on the dance floor.

When I reach her, she looks at me with a sympathetic look. "Well?" She asks, although I'm sure she already knows. "It seems like I'm never destined to be more than friends." I chuckle coldly. "Oh Y/n/n. You deserve so much more." She wraps her arms around me and holds me tight. "Maybe one day. But right now. I think I want to head home." I say and she nods. "Of course. We can come take you." She offers but I shake my head.

"No. Stay you're having fun. I can just grab a cab. I'll text you when I'm home" I reassure her. "Ok. If, you're sure. Please be careful." She says, placing a kiss to my cheek. I say goodbye to Charlie and Lizzie and ask Flo to tell Scarlett that I've headed home. Assuming that she's off with that guy from earlier.

Scarlett's POV:

Seeing Y/n hand in hand with Hailee was a pain I did not enjoy feeling. The jealousy built up within me, but I forced a fake smile on my face. When she told me she was going to be her plus one, it broke my heart. I love going to events like this with Y/n. She's so much fun and I feel like I can be completely myself around her.

I had developed feelings for her about a year ago, but I knew she was off limits being Flo's sister. Though seeing her tonight, I think I need a conversation with Flo. I don't think I can see Y/n date someone else. It would break me.

When she and Flo joined us on the dance floor, I looked around to see where Hailee was, but I couldn't see her which was odd. What I did notice was the change in demeanour from Y/n. I know her like the back of my hand, and I can tell when her feelings change. Has Hailee hurt her? If she has, I'm going to be having words.

When Hailee returns, I glare at her and watch intently as Y/n follows her off the dance floor. "Easy there you might kill her with that glare." Flo laughs at me. "You know, if you like her, you should just tell her. Stop fucking around with randoms and get your act together for her." She calls me out and I look at her shocked. "Come on, your feelings for her are pretty obvious. No matter how many people you sleep with, it won't change that. But you should know, you're going to lose her if you don't sort it out." Flo warns me.

"I uh. That's not what's going on. Besides, she's your sister." I try to defend weekly, and she just laughs loudly. "That doesn't bother me. As long as you're both happy that's all that matters. But I'm telling you now, if you decide to go there, you better not hurt her anymore. I won't take seeing her sad." She threatens lightly. "Wait, what do you mean anymore?" I question, which makes Flo's eyes go wide.

"Flo?" I question lowly but she just looks around her for an escape, which comes in the guise of Charlie, who she quickly pulls into her for a heated kiss. "Ok, wow. No need to eat his face. I don't need to see this." I say with a scrunched up face. I turn and make my way to the bathroom.

I splash some water on my face and try to psych myself up. "Come on Johansson. Just bite the bullet and tell her how you feel." I give myself a pep talk, looking at myself in the mirror. I need to do this before it's too late and her and Hailee are together.

With a wave of confidence, I make my way out of the bathroom on the hunt for Y/n. I catch the back of her and see her leaving. I run towards Flo in a panic. "Where's she going?" I ask her, worried I'm about to miss my opportunity. "She's heading home" Flo replies, a sad look on her face as she watches after her sister. "What about Hailee?" I ask but she simply points towards the bar where she's in the arms of Niall.

It makes my blood boil to know she's hurt her. It takes all of me to not head over there and give her a piece of my mind for hurting my best friend. "If you're quick, you might be able to catch her." Flo smirks at me. I don't think, instead, I rush off in pursuit of Y/n.

When I get outside, I see her propped against the wall, clearly waiting for a taxi. I take a deep breath and slowly walk over to her, resting on the wall next to her. "I'm sorry." I say, not really sure how to approach the situation. "It's ok. I'm used to leaving these sorts of things on my own." She chuckles dryly. "What's that supposed to mean?" I ask her. She's normally at these things with me.

"Oh, come on Scar. I'm normally getting a taxi after you've headed back home with whoever you've decided you want to sleep with that night." She responds with a bite to her tone. "Come on, that's not fair." I defend but she rolls her eyes. "When was the last time we left something like this together?" She asks me. My mouth just opens and closes as I try to find the answer, but it doesn't come to me.

"There's my cab, I better go." She says whilst I'm still lost in my head. But before she can walk away, I grab her arm and pull her into me. I don't even think, and I press my lips against hers. It takes her by shock and takes a moment before she starts to kiss me back. Her lips are soft, and I feel fireworks ignite in my stomach. But as she starts to sink into the kiss, she suddenly pulls away.

"NO!" She shouts as she pushes me away. "What?" I ask her shocked at her response. Oh God, have I totally misread this situation? I was sure she had feelings in return. "I will not be another notch on your bed post." She yells at me, her hands rising to her hair. "God, every time we come to these, I have to see you leave with some random person who you inevitably kick out and never see again. I force myself to come with you under the hope that maybe one day you might see that I'm here, right in front of you, and can give you what you've been looking for. But instead, I torture myself each time." She rants, angry at both me and herself.

She starts to pace, and I step in front of her to stop her. "Please stop pacing and listen to me." I try to get her attention. But she tries to walk around me towards the taxi. I manage to stop her and wave the taxi off, much to Y/n's annoyance. "Scarlett, that was my ride home." She exhales whilst glaring at me.

"Just stop and let me talk and I'll make sure you get home. Please." I practically beg her. She looks at me and sighs, nodding, indicating for me to go ahead. "You're right. I've been an ass, bringing you along and ditching you when I find someone to leave with. But you have to understand I only did that because I am madly in love with you and thought that you were out of reach." I admit.

She looks at me in complete shock. "No. This is some sort of joke." She tries to deny it, but I grip her arms a little tighter. "I didn't think that Flo would allow me to date you. So, I pushed my feelings down and tried to forget about you. But I never could." I share, embarrassed to admit that I chose to cope in this way.

"When I broke up with Colin, it hit me hard, not because I wasn't with him anymore. But because it became more obvious that I wasn't going to be able to avoid my feelings for you. So, I did what I do best and slept around so I could at least numb that feeling for a while." Tears start to build in my eyes as I admit my deepest feelings for Y/n.

I know that this is my only chance with her. I may miss any chance of being with her and may even ruin our friendship. I look at her, hoping to see any response or get an understanding for how she's feeling. But for the first time in a long time, I can't. Everything I've learnt about her, is wasted in this moment. "I was selfish. I didn't want to lose our friendship. Instead of being truthful, I dragged you along, pretending that I didn't know the pain it was causing you." I confess, ashamed of it.

"Please, just know that I do truly love you. I would do anything to have a chance to prove that to you. I don't think I can live this life without you in it. Please just tell me I have a chance." I plead, taking her hand in mine. She doesn't pull it away which gives me some comfort. "Scarlett, I don't know. I've tried so hard to move on from you." She says, pain lacing her voice. "That's why you stayed in LA?" I finally realise and she nods.

"It hurt when you would flirt with me and treat me like I was the only person in the room, to just ditch me at the first sign of someone else." She shares her feelings, and I can see how much damage I've caused. "I am so sorry that I made you feel like that. I wish I had just had the confidence to admit my feelings in the first place. I could have saved us both a lot of pain." I sigh.

"Y/n, please let me try to make this up to you. Even if it's just as friends. As much as that will hurt." I plead, hoping she'll give me a chance. She looks at me, her eyes darting between my own. She lets out a long sigh and shakes her head. "I'm going to regret this." She mumbles to herself, before lifting her head to look at me. "Ok, but we need to go slow. I want to know that you're 100% in this." She responds, making my heart sore.

"Of course, Y/n. I will do everything in my power to show you my true intention. We'll go at your pace, and I will make sure that I have clear communication with you. Thank you for giving me a chance. I won't waste it." I thank her, taking her other hand in mine, my smile growing with happy tears falling. "Can I start by taking you on a date?" I ask her nervously. "I'd like that." She responds shyly, which makes my heart flutter. She's so cute.

"Perfect, I'll pick you up at 7 tomorrow. Wear something comfy. I'm going to pamper you." I tell her through a big smile. "Someone's eager." She chuckles. "I've wasted too much time. I'm not wasting anymore." I tell her, our gaze locking on each other. I want nothing more than to kiss her, but I know I need to take this slow and do this right. Hopefully if the date tomorrow goes well, I'll get to kiss her then.

"Come on, I'll take you home." I tell her, directing her towards my driver. I hold the door open for her and she slides in. When I get in next to her, I take her hand in mine. The ride to her apartment is silent, but it's not awkward.

When we pull up outside her building, I get out to walk her to her door. "Thank you for giving me another chance Y/n. I promise I'll make this up to you." I thank her, feeling a relief that hopefully we're on the right track now. "Don't mess this up Johansson." She smiles at me, opening her door. "Oh, trust me. I don't plan to." I smirk, waving to her as she goes to shut the door. "See you tomorrow." She smiles, lingering for a moment. "See you tomorrow, Pugh." I grin, walking back towards the elevator.

As soon as the door shuts, my whole body relaxes. I can't believe she agreed. The smile is plastered on my face, with no plans on leaving anytime soon. As I make my way home, I think of how I can give her the perfect date. I want it to be everything that she deserves. Because I know that Y/n is it for me. There is no one else in this world that I want to spend the rest of my life with. I just need to prove that to her and this date will be the first step to doing that. 

[vierlieben]

Heavenly.

choi san x f!reader

genre: fluff

desc.: your boyfriend came home, feeling like the entire world is on his back. as a loving and caring girlfriend, you did something for him to make him feel not just "better", but "heavenly".

wc: 1,059

the hands of the clock told you that it's now 6:45 pm. then you continued washing the dishes. the sink's loaded after baking cookies for an order. you have been standing for like ten minutes now in here.

you know that any moment, your boyfriend would find you doing the dishes and would give you a warm back hug. as you were just thinking about that, you felt something pressed onto your body; arms wrapped around your waist, head resting on your shoulder.

you didn't even hear San enter the apartment, all you can hear is the flowing water—the faucet's loud as hell.

"well, good evening to you, mister." you greeted with a sweet tone.

you were thinking that he was just sleepy or lazy to talk, as how he always is when he gets home—but no, his head resting on your shoulder right now is heavier than ever. it is like the entire world is on your back. San is putting all of his head's weight on your shoulder but you didn't mind at all.

"hey," you turned your head to him, quickly finishing the dishes. "love, are you alright?"

you felt him shake his head lazily. few seconds passed and you are finally done with these damn dishes. you quickly dried your hands and turned around to see him; his eyes are half opened, shoulders almost dropping on the floor, and you can also feel the weight that he's carrying right now although you don't know what's going on yet.

"come here, what's wrong?" you wrapped your arms around his upper body, he rested his head on your shoulder again. "rough day at work? exhausted? tell me, baby..."

the caressing on his back made him feel calmer. San sighed so deeply. "i am not going to have rough days at work for a while because the investors in our company are now gone..."

you felt like tearing up when you heard that tone. it was low, and sad... this is your first time hearing your boyfriend talk like this and it's breaking your heart.

"oh, baby..," you gave him a couple of pats on his back. "you're going to be alright. i mean, it's fine to feel that way for now. but we're going through this, okay?"

"i know.." his tone sounded a lot better now. "it's just... i don't know, it kind of hurt me. I've been working for that company for almost two years now and it's going to close out of nowhere. i am just going to miss them. plus, i don't think i could ever stand being just here all day, doing and earning nothing."

"no, love, shush," you broke the hug and looked straight to his eyes. "come on, it's going to be fine. i will help you find a new job. but for now, the world won't end if you would just stay at home for a while with me, right? i will take care of you."

he painted an upside down smile and pulled you again for a hug. "alright then.. i just couldn't help but to feel bad. but I'm fine now that i head those from you."

"yeah..." you caressed his back once again. "would you do me a favor?"

you know so well that San is kind of workaholic... well, it's because he wants to earn and earn for his and your future together. he likes to invest in big things. he's been very helpful when it comes to financial problems, especially to his friends. that's one of the millions of things that you love about him—he is truly reliable, dependable all the time.

he can't stand it whenever he's not doing something productive. well, if it's not a job to work on, he'll be all over you; spoiling you, taking care of you as if you're a queen, taking you everywhere you'd like, just EVERYTHING. sometimes you'd feel bad because he's just doing things for you and often forgets to do something for himself, but then he would reassure you that he's fine and would finally do something about it just so you won't feel bad anymore.

"what favor?" he asked back.

"will you please stop thinking about getting a job for a while? maybe a month or two? just... i want you to get some rest, you need that. we have more than enough here, my love. what's very important right now is that you get some relaxation and time for yourself. everything's taken care of, keep that in mind. will you?" you asked him with the calmest, sweetest tone ever—the one that he won't even dare to disagree with.

he nodded, his head still on your shoulder but now lighter. "i will, baby. thank you, i love you. maybe i have been overworking a bit... i will rest for now."

"perfect," your eyes shined. you broke the hug and kissed his forehead. "now, come with me. i'll do something to make you feel better."

"but i already feel better—"

"just shut it and come with me," you glared at him, and he looked at you with his eyes smiling.

"how's that feel?"

San feels like dreaming — like he's on the clouds and there are angels singing for him.

he didn't answer your question yet. the whole bathroom is filled with nothing but silence.

he's like a child sitting on the toilet while you are shampooing and massaging his head. this is the kind of therapy that he's been craving for—too bad, why did you just think of it now? you could have made him feel good in this way before.

"hey? are you sleeping?" you whispered.

"i don't know what to say..." he whispered back, you almost didn't hear it. "heavenly..."

you smiled at the thought that maybe he's feeling so good. he really does. you're glad that you're finally making him feel this way...

"you should do this to me everytime that I'm taking a bath..." he murmured, eyes still closed. "will you?"

"you don't even have to ask." you replied. "i have been also wanting to do this but you take quick baths, how's that possible?"

he chuckled. "afraid to be late at work."

you two laughed silently.

"i'd do this to you as well, baby." he added. "maybe reward me with a kiss?"

"how many kisses are we talking about?"

[octuscle]

Full time barista here I’ve always been envious of the men on stage especially the heavy weights. Don’t want to over work the chronivac but help me become a muscle bull as big as jean pierre fux.

Mate, I understand you only too well…. There are few things hotter than the real heavy beefcakes. I've tried it long enough myself… But I didn't make it either. Jean Pierre is a pretty good role model… But I have an idea…

Friday morning. It's 06:00, you have to hurry, in one hour you have to prepare the first coffee. You don't have time for much more than a few situps and pushups. In the bathroom you have to hurry. You need longer and longer to conceal your receding hairline. You are now 40 years old, slowly you just notice that you are getting older. If you go out tonight to party, it will take you almost the whole Saturday to recover. The cosmetic industry has nothing effective to offer against the wrinkles in the corners of your eyes. And even if you don't need to be ashamed of your body: You won't gain much more muscle in your lifetime.

Shit, at 07:00 o'clock people are already queuing up. You hate it when you can't open the store in peace. But as it looks, it will be 10:00 o'clock, until you have the first moment of rest. In fact, it's even 10:30 when your colleague thinks you can take a break. If you need it, he adds with a wink. You look fantastic today! You take a mineral water and sit down in the warehouse. In fact, you feel pretty damn good right now. You drink the water in one go. You don't have much time for a break. And you have to piss again before the lunch business starts. Your lower jaw drops as you wash your hands. Fuck, what happened to you. There are no more receding hairlines or laugh lines. You look ten years younger than when you got up today. The only difference is that you look as if you'd spent the last ten years doing little else but lifting iron. Your T-shirt is almost blown up by your biceps and pecs. And your jeans look like they're painted on your monstrous legs. How could you not notice that? As you tie the apron back on your way back to the counter, you wonder why you were just amazed. Since your 20th birthday, you've spent every spare minute at the gym, investing every penny you earn in protein and supplements. Hell, if you didn't look the way you do, you would have wasted a hell of a lot of time and money.

The calm in your coffee bar begins to subside again. The lunch business is starting up. There's a beefcake in your line that makes you jealous. Yo, bro! he greets you. It's nice to see that there are real men working here, too. What you can recommend to him. You suggest the protein bomb. A scramble of 10 eggs with 400 grams of chicken breast. He grins and nods. And a liter of still mineral water. The bro shares your taste. While you type everything into the register, he asks you if you're all-natural. Of course you are. With the money for the meal, he slides you a card. In case you want to think about it.

It is 17:00 o'clock, when you tie off your apron. Fuck' according to your watch you have walked 12,000 steps today on the few square meters behind the counter. But it also looks like it's been a pretty good day so far. You're 20 now, and the idea of opening your own café with healthy and, above all, protein-rich food came to you when you were 16. That's when you started getting into high performance bodybuilding. And a place like this was missing at that time. And then you built this place with your mentor and trainer as a straw man. But you can't stand behind the counter for more than ten hours. Even if you are the best advertisement for your products, you have to work out at least four hours every day. Otherwise you don't stand a chance on the big stage.

You might not be one of the big ones yet… But you are on a really good way to get there. You met Jean Pierre Fux once at a fitness fair in Germany. A great role model for you. And he said that at your age he would have been a linnet compared to you. The prerequisites for a brilliant career are there. Enjoy it and make the best of it!

This and other hot pics @anton227ludwig

[oneatlatime]

Appa's Lost Days

Dare I hope?

You know, if ten year old me had turned on my TV to watch my weekly dose of Avatar and been greeted with a nearly two minute long uninterrupted sequence of a frightened and distressed animal being mistreated, that TV would have turned right back off again.

I don't buy that a ten tonne bison who has the leverage of his own weight as well as his airbending abilities would succumb to so few people.

Name one other character that Avatar has presented as so thoroughly without any redeeming characteristics. Even Zhao was at least kind of funny. Everything about the chucklehead on the left is rotten to the core. "What's your dad going to do when he finds out we broke his stuff while doing crime?" "Nothing. It's not his stuff; it's previous crime."

I thought beetle-headed was a commentary on their intelligence, but it's actually a description.

I'm rapidly coming to the conclusion that I should have waited to get my hopes up until I came to an episode called Appa's Found Days. Is this whole thing going to be a series of near misses with the Gaang?

You know, if I had a nickel for every time an animal companion on this show has been threatened with a trip to the butcher's, I'd have two nickels. In the space of two episodes.

This is not fun to watch guys.

Not if I break you first asshole.

The way this Nurse Ratched type circus guy says "earn it" is chilling.

Of course the Fire Nation would find a way to turn bending into animal abuse. Of course.

a) that cage is way too small b) who knew cabbage suction could be so cute?

Completely unsubtle parallel with the boy here, right down to the complete disregard they show to the threats thrown their way.

Stubborn and wilful are not adjectives I would use to describe Appa this episode, or ever.

Wind buffalo. Wind Buffalo. Really? Was Fart Cow taken?

That's a very relatable facial expression.

That makeup and costume is awful.

Now that's satisfying.

Is the Fire Nation kid voiced by Aang's voice actor?

Nevermind. THAT'S satisfying.

I was right - this episode is Appa always being a step behind the Gaang.

Baby Appas! This almost makes this episode worth it!

It's funny how a single feature can contribute so much to a character's design. Arrowless Aang is just some kid. Let me rephrase that, since such a big part of Aang's character is the fact that he's just some goofy kid. Arrowless Aang is indistinguishable from other kids for the first time this series, because every other time we've seen him on screen he's either the only child airbender with his arrows, or the only airbender left.

Lady monks. Nuns? I don't think I've seen those before.

Appa and Aang share a dreamscape? That could be useful.

There's dumb, there's really dumb, and then there's 'wake a completely asleep and therefore harmless unknown creature with threats of violence' dumb.

Close call for Iroh. Do you think he's suspected that Appa (and presumably the Avatar) haven been in Ba Sing Se this whole time?

Bipedal Appa is strange. A very effective fighter, but strange to look at.

I'm amazed that giant boar thing walked away from that.

And now they're hitting me with an 'Appa's given Up' montage. Someone who works on this show hates me.

*Heroically refrains from ranting about the impracticality of using white fabric for an active warrior's glove.*

"This could be our most important mission yet." Foreshadowing?

Did Suki and Appa actually meet at any point in the Warriors of Kyoshi episode?

Turns out 'Aang' is a magic word.

Appa kisses!

Appa is apparently legally banned from having anything good for more than five minutes. Although it's good writing that they're using a previously established weakness - Appa's shedding - to bring the danger ladies back in.

I guess they have Azula drop the line about her brother to remind the audience of who she is, but surely Suki's like "Who are you? Who's your brother? Why should I care?"

Azula going after the Kyoshi warriors is completely unnecessary right? The Avatar isn't there. Neither are Zuko and Iroh. It doesn't even net her Appa. She's just looking for someone to beat up.

WOW this is bad writing. Like really bad. My Immortal levels of bad.

Would it be too much to ask for the Kyoshi warriors to do even slightly ok against the Azula ladies? Couldn't they at least get a couple of hits in?

Kudos to Suki for essentially sacrificing herself and her warriors to save Appa. 'Most important mission yet' was a bit on the nose.

Out of options, Appa goes home. Ouch.

Someone explain this to me. Air Bison teething ring?

My what a human sounding cough you have buddy.

This is why you don't use Air Bison as guard dogs.

I like what this Guru is saying. Fear displacing trust but not love feels more accurate than how I usually see the consequences of trauma discussed.

The music playing throughout this sequence fits so well. I think it's some sort of metal thing you hit - I want to say a variation on tubular bells, and maybe something Glockenspiel adjacent? It's unlike anything I've heard in this show before and it fits so well that I'm nerding out a bit.

Disney princess Guru. Aang has Disney princess moments too. Maybe it's an Air Nomad thing?

No wonder the monks built a temple here. Even destroyed, it's gorgeous.

And Appa decides to trust again. I love it when an animal visibly comes to a decision about your trustworthiness.

This energy reading stuff makes sense given that Aang and Appa already share a dreamscape.

He IS a great beast. The best!

OH COME ON

Someone whip up a wanted poster for Long Feng: Cattle Rustler. It had also never occurred to me that he was an earthbender.

That flip move with the earthbending platform must have caused Appa to land on his back. I bet that hurt.

One of the times I am very grateful that the closing credits music is so upbeat.

Final Thoughts

@aboutiroh I see why you recommended I save my chocolate for this episode.

The Tale of Momo was really just a preparatory taste of things to come, huh? Almost a microcosm of this episode.

This is the first episode where I had to take breaks while watching. Especially the circus sequence, I think I got up twice to do things like get a cup of tea and stare randomly out windows at squirrels. I didn't even have to do that with Zuko Alone, despite freaking out a lot about it, because at least that episode took breaks from the child abuse to check in with Aang being miserable. This episode was unrelenting.

If I had seen this episode when I was the age of the target audience, this may well have turned me off the show for good. If my Mom had seen this episode, I would have been banned from watching the show entirely. Not a decision I'd agree with, but my Mom is the type of person who banned her kids from watching Bambi.

To watch through all of that unrelenting animal (at best) unhappiness, and still not get Appa back at the end of the episode? That's a bit much. It's not often that this show ends its episodes without at least a little bit of something positive.

Once again, the music did a lot of heavy lifting this episode. The animal noises weren't quite as emotive as the ones in Momo's Tale, but Appa's face is more expressive, and more was shown through his expression than through Momo's, so I feel like this episode had just as much non-verbal animal communication as Momo's Tale.

I think I'm renaming season 2 "the Suki redemption arc." I really didn't like the Warriors of Kyoshi episode, and I didn't like what her character did in that episode. But every time Suki appears in season 2? She absolutely nails it.

The show since losing Appa has taken to wallowing. Even with bright spots like the poetry bouncer, the overall tone since Appa's appanapping has been ever more dark. If this keeps up for many more episodes, it will no longer be fun to watch.

Somehow I don't think this one is going on my rewatch list.

[leonsliga]

Keeping On

–> It's been a long road back from injury for Manuel Neuer, but at 38 he is once again integral to Bayern München's success. After breaking the Champions League clean sheet record against Arsenal in the quarter-finals, he reflects on a career that still has plenty of road ahead.

Manuel Neuer is in a reflective mood. Now 38, the Bayern München goalkeeper became a father for the first time in March - something which can add a fresh layer of perspective to anybody's outlook. Yet right now, as he sits speaking to Champions Journal, his focus is on another event which prompted much introspection on his part - the career-threatening lower-leg break he suffered in a skiing accident in December 2022.

"If we were to ask the medical staff and the rehab team, they would scarcely believe that we are where we are today because I think out of every ten people only one or two manage to come back from that," he says. "Particularly after the injuries and with the games I played, it couldn't have gone any better than it did, for me to be standing in goal and performing well again. It was a big strain for me, which is normal for a serious injury. I think everything takes time and ultimately nature decided if it would work out or if I would never be able to play again.”

That he was back playing for Bayern ten months after the fracture to the tibia and fibula in his right leg was down to "thinking positively and the desire to play football and play professional sport again". That determination should surprise none of us given the admirable longevity of a player who, among the goalkeeping fraternity, is second only to lker Casillas for most appearances in the Champions League, with 138 (prior to this month's semi-finals) to the Spaniard’s 177.

Moreover, with his clean sheet in the quarter-final home victory over Arsenal, he did not just help his team into another semi-final but surpassed Casillas's record of 57 shutouts in the competition. "It's not the most important thing there is but it's nice for my team-mates - and all the colleagues I've played with in the past - if we think about our defensive work. I started with Schalke and then continued at Bayern, right up to the present day, and it's great that it's not over yet."

Those clean sheets are part of a bigger picture in which he has made over 500 appearances for Bayern and worn the captain's armband since 2017 - earning a special place in the club's pantheon as one of only three goalkeepers to have held aloft the European Cup along with Sepp Maier and Oliver Kahn.

As an interviewee, Neuer speaks with the clarity and maturity of a man on the verge of 500 Bundesliga games and - ahead of this summer's EURO - 117 senior caps for Germany. He is polite to the point of shaking the hand of every member of the film crew present as he introduces himself.

Since his early days at Schalke, his first club, he has been considered a pioneer of the sweeper-keeper role though in his eyes, defensive security still represents the most important thing a goalkeeper can give his colleagues. "I think being able to give the rest of the team the feeling that they've got someone at the back that they can rely on to provide assurance, that's the decisive factor.”

That assurance was there again in Bayern's semi-final first leg against Real Madrid as he flung himself to his left to keep out a deflected shot from Toni Kroos, then stood tall to foil Vinícius Júnior in a one-v-one. Arguably, it has always been there - at least to some degree. His first clean sheet in the Champions League was on 3 October 2007 in a 2-0 Schalke win at Rosenborg. Then he was a fresh-faced 21-year-old playing for his home-town team. Looking back on his younger self, and how he has changed, he says: "I would just be more relaxed [nowadays] and also not try and decide everything on the pitch - that is kind of the difference from Manuel at the beginning, at Schalke, who wanted to take a lot into his own hands, to do a lot himself. I also know that I cannot influence everything. I'd say I was a bit wilder - I didn't have this sense of calm and maybe the charisma as well. I was, of course, always an attacking goalkeeper who tried to join in the build-up play.”

"It's obviously been a long time since then when you look back on it. It's also very normal, given that I'm now 38, that I've developed a fair bit since then. But it's nice to cast your mind back to those days, and how things were at that time."

Now we are back in those days, let's stay there a little longer. With Schalke, he reached the Champions League quarterfinals in his debut season of 2007/08. In 2011 he helped the Gelsenkirchen club into the semi-finals where they lost to Manchester United. That summer he headed south to Bayern. Remembering the move, he says: "It certainly wasn't easy. There was a lot of media scrutiny about my character in making the switch from Schalke to Bayern. There were lots of fans who weren't thrilled about it.

"I think that the support of the club, of the team, was very important. I already knew lots of the German players from the national team - they were definitely very excited that I was coming to Bayern. That was something that I realised from the first day when we started training at Säbener Strässe [Bayern's training ground in the south of the city] and then at the training camp. And so, I felt very comfortable from the beginning."

His first campaign in Munich ended with a Champions League final defeat at Bayern's home stadium against Chelsea. He had shone in the preceding semi-final victory over Real Madrid, saving from Cristiano Ronaldo and Kaká in the concluding shoot-out. These were not his first spot-kick heroics, mind: two saves against Porto had taken Schalke to the last eight in that debut season.

"You have to radiate confidence and try to show your opponent that you are stronger than they are," he says of the mano a mano challenge that penalties bring. Yet he tasted the downside of those duels in the final against Chelsea, with Bayern beaten despite his stop from Juan Mata. "Fundamentally, we were satisfied with how we performed on the pitch, but in the end we didn't get over the line," he recalls of a year in which they also finished runners-up in the Bundesliga and German Cup. "It meant that we were extra motivated when we went into the next season and that made a difference. I think that the coaching staff around Jupp Heynckes were also very motivated. From the first day, it was clear that we all wanted to achieve something that season, and you could see that from then on."

Cue a treble-winning campaign, with successes in the German league and cup allied to a 2-1 Champions League final success over Borussia Dortmund at Wembley. Back-to-back clean sheets against Barcelona in the semi-final had underlined, in Neuer's own words, that he was "someone that can be relied upon". It meant he ended his first two campaigns in the competition with Bayern with a total of ten clean sheets. And his development continued the following year with Germany’s World Cup triumph in Brazil, where he racked up four more shutouts.

He relates: “I gained a lot of experience from 2012 to 2013, from the success, and also the next stages because we had coaches who taught us a lot. I think the team developed too, which we also benefited from, and then the German national players became world champions. We had a lot of self-confidence. I was able to learn a lot from the good coaches and from my good team-mates and no one can take that experience away from you. That is why I can always play to the best of my ability, even in big games."

If that was one golden chapter, another came in 2020 when he lifted the Champions League trophy again, with the Bayern team who defeated Paris Saint-Germain in the final in Lisbon. That was the competition that concluded in empty stadiums in Portugal owing to the pandemic. "It meant a lot to me; he remembers. "I think it was the best team performance that we put together for the club. It was a bit harder given the conditions that we had to play under during the coronavirus period. How we prepared, and the spirit and fitness we went into these games with... put simply, we earned that success. It wasn't always clear that we would beat Paris in the end. We worked really hard to stay in the game and then Kingsley [Coman] made it 1-0.

"That was a team success and, unfortunately, you could not celebrate with the fans. That was the downside, that we won the Champions League in Lisbon, which of course meant just as much to us, but it would have been even better if the spectators had been there."

Neuer, for the record, registered clean sheets in both the one-off semi-final against Lyon and then that final versus Paris. His enduring excellence has been on display this season too, since his return from injury - with four shutouts in seven outings up to the semi-final stage.

It would be no surprise if the first of those, clean sheet no55 of his Champions League career at home to Copenhagen on 29 November, had felt especially sweet, coming 421 days after the previous one against Viktoria Plzen on 4 October the previous year. If this takes us back to the difficulties - physical and mental - of his injury, he cites a silver lining.

"I think every break and every injury also has some good in it. Nothing comes at the right time. The injury was supposed to be simple but you have to look deep into your eyes and say, 'Hey, I will take this challenge on and will try to come out of it stronger.’ That took a little while of course but I couldn't expect anything else."

Once again, Neuer has experienced enough of football's ups and downs to see the bigger picture. And right now, it holds more than one reason for optimism, including the prospect of playing in Germany's home EURO this summer - home town Gelsenkirchen and adopted home town Munich are among the ten venues. He has not forgotten the feeling of the last major tournament his nation staged, the 2006 FIFA World Cup. "In 2006, I was watching in public viewing areas and soaking up the atmosphere - it was just sensational how Germany hosted the world," he says.

Back then he was 18 and had just completed his first full season with Schalke's second team. We go back to the question of his evolution as a player over the years. "I would say that maybe I am a bit calmer, and also more disciplined in my actions, though it always depends on the team-mates we have, who is playing, how do I have to adjust as the goalkeeper, what game plan we have, what does the coach want, how high is the line, how are we defending, how do we want to play out from the back? There are always little things that change and that is the case whether I play for the national team or for Bayern, and it is the same from coach to coach in the seasons when we have competed in the Champions League - there are always nuances that are different, but fundamentally I have always stayed true to the way I play." And while that involves Neuer's work with the ball at his feet, he has not lost sight of the one thing that matters above all for a goalkeeper: "The clean sheets." 

~ Written by Simon Hart for Issue 19 of the Champions Journal

[dimmadomeglobal]

Dale is def the extreme emotional pregnant like, prolly sobbed and bought out McDonalds or smth cuz they put onions on his burger

Agreed. He's already a very emotional guy, I mean, he was straight up crying a river in Founder's Day. And onions? You know how much those stink? One whiff of that and he's going to throw up!

I've seen some fanfics on Ao3 depict him as very cold and unfeeling. However, I disagree with that interpretation. Bro feels a lot! He gets angry when things don't go his way and he falls into fits of despair when his ability to earn money is hindered even slightly. He stalked a ten year old because he got upset that she didn't want to buy his crap! He's super emotionally unstable and being pregnant certainly didn't help with that.

The fact that he was pressured into having a baby when he really wasn't ready for it didn't help either. I'd even go as far as to say that he only went through with the pregnancy because his father was pressuring him to produce an heir. Him getting pregnant, let alone keeping it, is out of character, I admit. He had to have gotten some pressure from an external source, such as his father. Though to be fair, Doug didn't expect Dale to produce an heir that way. He figured that since the Dimmadomes are super mega rich, he could just hire a surrogate. Although he's aware that Dale's trans, he didn't even think that him getting pregnant was an option. Although Doug found it embarrassing that his son was pregnant, an heir's an heir. He can't complain.

I also like to think he experienced some postpartum depression. Bro had the worst pregnancy ever and even after it was done he couldn't catch a break. He couldn't care for baby Dev, especially considering that he refused to take parental leave from work. So he reprogrammed two of the au pairs care for him instead. Over time, he just stopped taking care of Dev. Cue child neglect.

[adobe-outdesign]

if you haven’t yet, could you review the dragonite line?

I'll be upfront, I've always really liked this line, with Dragonair being one of my top ten favorite Pokemon. I think part of it is just the simplicity; there's just the right amount of real-world elements and fantasy elements, without too much detail to over-clutter things.

Dratini, for example, is just a small sea serpent, and there's not even a clear theme at this stage. However, details like the fins on its head and the white nose make it stand out enough so it's not overly generic. It also does a good job of looking enough like its evo while still being distinct due to most of the main elements being different (head fins, bump instead of horn, white nose, rounded underbelly, lighter color, etc.).

Speaking of its evo, Dragonair is just straight-up beautiful. The long slender body is really elegant, and the minimalist details give it just the right amount of flavor without being overbearing. It's one of the only Pokemon in my top 10 favs that earns that spot solely through visuals alone.

The new orbs on its body are perfectly placed, and their addition makes the theme of this line clear—it's an imugi, a Korean lesser dragon that only becomes a true dragon when a jewel falls from the sky every 1000 years. In addition to the theming, these orbs are also distinctive and serve to convey the vibe of a semi-mythical animal.

In addition to this, the body has some white countershading that starts and ends at the orbs, which breaks up the main body just enough. This white is then accented by the white of its horn and the two wings on its head; another unexpected element, and another very pretty one at that. As far as I'm concerned, nothing about this design could be improved.

I know some people really dislike Dragonite, but I'm going to defend it to a degree. Yes, it is much more generic than Dragonair, having lost some of its more distinctive features, and I do think that's a shame (losing the orbs makes sense because that's how imugi work, but why replace the fluffy wings with utterly generic dragon ones?). And yes, the change between it and its pre-evos is a little jarring.

HOWEVER, people tend to act like its completely detached from the rest of the line, which is just plain wrong. It still has:

The same rounded head shape

A horn

Two things on either side of the horn

A lighter-color underbelly

A smooth, curved body shape

Even thematically, the change from a serpent to a dragon ties into the imugi thing, with Dragonair obtaining the orbs and then becoming a true dragon. It's definatley not the best evolution out there in terms of memorability (it's a fairly generic dragon at this stage) or coherency, but it still makes sense as an evo.

If I were to make any tweaks to Dragonite, it would simply be to change the colors. I don't know why it suddenly becomes orange, and the change is jarring when a clear pattern was established with both of the pre-evos being blue. The line looks 200% better just by keeping the colors consistent, and you could always make the orange its shiny:

I also would've kept the wings on the back but kept the feathered look of Dragonair's; its much more interesting and would've further helped with consistency. Everything else, however, I think is fine. Not as good as its pre-evos, but certainly not awful by any means.

Side note: there's a lot of talk about this line getting something in the future. In all honestly, I don't think it needs it; it's still an iconic and well-loved line with decent stats. That said, Dragonite is one of the only psuedo-legendaries that doesn't have a new form, so I guess it would be fair enough to give it something. A regional could work, maybe something that brings Dragonite in-line with Dratini and Dragonair a bit more. I could also see a split evo being a thing.

Anyway, overall: Dratini and Dragonair are the perfect blend of mystical and normal attributes, and are quite beautiful all around. Dragonite is also good, but more generic and suffering a bit from some strange color choices. As a whole, however, this line is pretty fantastic.

[infamousbrad]

This was hard for me to watch all the way through because it's personal for me. But for the grace of god, that would have been me. As a lifelong crazy person, I've feared institutionalization since I first heard of it 50 years ago.

I am presently on disability for chronic major depression and complex PTSD, after growing up in a chronically abusive household and then, outside the home, surviving a homicide attempt. When I could find ADA-compliant employers I was able to work a successful 30+ year career. I still eventually broke down and, now that I'm drawing disability insurance, I do need support with some regular activities, the ones that overwhelm my coping skills. In my case, my representative payee works for free, as a volunteer with Overland Baptist Church, because in a typical month all I need is 3-4 zoom calls. So it costs the state basically zero dollars for me to live in the real world, and occasionally be as useful as any other retiree, and, important to me (and, one would think, to anybody who believes in the American creed), I am free.

As a lifelong mentally ill person, I have known since I was 12 or 13 that this state, that most states, want me permanently in some kind of prison. If you can't take care of yourself, then you need to be locked up at gunpoint and forced to do as much as you can, right? "Are there no prisons? Are there no workhouses?"

Except that locking me up would cost the state tens of thousands of dollars per year and get maybe a thousand or so dollars' a year back from labor at gunpoint. Labor I'd undertake at standard wages if I could find an ADA-compliant employer willing to hire a 64 year old, which, yeah, right.

Supportive housing preserves freedom, maximizes employability, and costs not even a tenth of what prison costs (or involuntary commitment, which is just prison with a fancier name and very nearly just as expensive). But supportive housing looks, to stingy people with deadened souls, like an un-earned benefit (as if anybody wanted to live dependent on supportive housing!), and prison/commitment looks like punishing the unworthy, and boy oh boy howdy do (miserable, soul-less) human beings love punishing the unworthy.

(For more details see also Clara Bates, "Missouri is breaking federal law by housing mentally ill in nursing homes, DOJ finds: Majority of Missourians sent to restrictive nursing homes because of mental illness would be better served in a less restrictive setting, a year-and-a-half federal investigation determined," Missouri Independent. June 20th, 2024.)

[questinwitchface]

In the latest chapter of "Break; Walk Away; Come Back; Rebuild; Stay", Sam held back his true thoughts about something until Bucky unknowingly made him comfortable to say what he felt. Why do you think Sam was uncomfortable speaking up though he and Bucky have already been together and they'd just gone through several positive therapy sessions? Just curious and would love analysis from an author's perspective. Thanks!

Okay, let me first apologize for not answering right away. The reason I'm only getting to it now is that it's an incredibly busy time of year and also I didn't have an immediate answer to type out right away. I've had so much fun thinking over this question for the last few days, and I really appreciate you asking, anon!

I think part of my initial struggle to answer this question is the idea that Sam was holding back his true thoughts about whether he's ready to try having sex with Bucky again. In the beginning of the chapter, when Ella brings it up, Sam says that he wasn't prepared to have that conversation and that he wants time to think about it before they discuss it. There are two parts to that: the "I'm not prepared" and "I need time to think about it." If we assume that Sam is being honest (which, by my intention, he is), then I think this is evidence that Sam isn't sure how he's feeling about it at that point in the chapter. He hasn't thought about it enough to know where he stands, so he needs time to think about how he feels about it, and then he needs time to prepare to have that conversation.

During the chapter, Sam gets time to think about it. The ten-minute ride from therapy to the restaurant is quiet between them, and then when they get to the restaurant and sit down, Sam seems withdrawn, as if something is on his mind. My intention there was to show that he is thinking it over, and that it's not a simple yes or no, but something that needs consideration. While they're at the restaurant, they very briefly discuss that Sam's thinking about whether he's ready for them to have sex, and he points out how the first time they were together, they admitted their feelings and then were in bed together that night, which I had intended as an example of how they didn't necessarily communicate well during their first relationship - they cared about each other and acted on that care, yes, but they didn't necessarily take time to communicate effectively about it. This time has been different; they've been very focused on the communication and acting more slowly and deliberately. This time, it's been three or four months, and all they've done is kiss and dry hump on Sam's couch. Bucky says that this is because the history between them makes a difference, and Sam agrees, adding that they needed to earn each other's trust back.

I think that part of why Sam decides he's ready is because of the communication; Bucky gave him time and space to think it over, and he was not pushy about it. That, coupled with the way Bucky didn't push when they were dry humping on Sam's couch and how Bucky held back during the kiss after their second first date until he was sure Sam was into it allows Sam to feel safe, and allows Sam to trust Bucky, which allows him to feel ready to try having sex again.

So I don't necessarily think Sam is uncomfortable to speak up so much as he is genuinely making that decision throughout this chapter. He's not ready before Ella even brings it up; he's going through the process of making that choice. I'd argue that once he's made that choice, which I think happens sometime during the meal while they're talking about other things, he's actually very forthcoming with his opinion on the matter. He tells Bucky frankly, in no uncertain terms, and without any show of discomfort or awkwardness that he's ready to try having sex again.

The only time Sam seems uncomfortable is during the brief conversation with Bucky at the restaurant, before it becomes clear that Bucky isn't going to push him for an answer he doesn't have yet. Once Bucky gives him the space to find that answer, Sam relaxes. I did that because one of the big issues for them learning to communicate effectively was giving each other time to come up with solid answers - in a previous chapter, Ella had to explain to Sam that "I don't know" is a valid for-now answer, and Sam had to learn to give Bucky time to think and come up with his answers, and I wanted this chapter to mirror that, to show that Bucky can extend that same courtesy to Sam. I also did this because Bucky says in a previous chapter that Sam always knows what to say, and in that instance, it was like Bucky didn't know how to respond to Sam not knowing what to say, and in this chapter, Bucky responds by giving Sam space and being supportive in a way that he wasn't in previous chapters, so this shows their growth as a couple.

So to sum up: I don't think Sam was uncomfortable with sharing his thoughts, I think he genuinely needed time to think and was uncomfortable because he was worried Bucky would expect an answer Right Now, but once Bucky gave him the space, Sam relaxed and, because of the contrast between their history and their present, was able to trust Bucky enough to decide that he wants to try having sex again. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to be long-winded about my writing! I love sharing my thoughts on my stories. It's always fun to see where my interpretations as the author differ from those of the readers. It's so much fun when fanfic is a conversation!

[cursedbag]

Author's Note: it's been about a billion years since I've written any sort of fan fiction but I saw a post that was just... inspirational (I don't remember exactly who posted it but it was for sure on Tumblr)

Anyways, warnings: 18+, minors don't interact, not proofread, afab!reader but 2nd pov used, reader is a nepo baby and not into unions, potentially degrading? Idk lmao Nanami might be a little ooc, it's been a hot minute since I read the manga

His Hard Earned Bonus

Lawyer! Nanami x CEO! Reader

Your hands gripped tightly on Nanami's hair as his tongue bullied your clit. His tongue always worked magic when you were stressed. Meetings, clients, your employees' desire to unionize, he would make those trivial problems melt away; legally and sexually.

"Nanamin~" you moaned as he tightened his grip on your thighs. He hummed in response, not pulling away to entertain anything beyond himself. His tie was thrown over his shoulder as he enjoyed his meal with messy slurps. He had your panties in his back pocket with no intention of giving them back.

Nanami was a man who always had a healthy sexual appetite. It's part of the reason why he became a lawyer. The gratification of getting his clients *exactly* what they wanted with the benefit of a solid paycheck behind it. When you first hired him, he couldn't get you out of his head. The cold glances that you'd give your subordinates, the glares you gave to your CFOs and CMOs; it made it near impossible to do his job without some sort of added benefit. Especially with how spoiled and bratty you were (on account that your father was the chairman).

Nanami loved that you were spoiled rotten; it always made his job a bit more exciting than it actually was. You could demand anything and he'd just ask for a deadline. So when the Christmas party rolled around, a well placed mistletoe was all that he needed to seduce you. Sure, there would have to be secrets for the sake of both of your careers but Nanami relished in the secret little rendezvous he planned.

"It's almost like you want to get caught," you chided with a soft moan. As if you wouldn't love something like that, to be caught with the hot blond lawyer between your legs as he feasted on you like you're the only thing he ate. You pulled at his hair, earning a groan from his lips that vibrated against your folds. Your essence dripped down his chin as he looked up at you insatiably. He pulled away, much to your dismay.

"If I wanted you to be bratty, I would have waited until I got to your penthouse," he stood up from his kneeling position, "we wouldn't want a certain chairman to find out that you're taking advantage of a lowly employee."

"As if my father would believe that. Besides, you came on to me. Metaphorically and literally," you winked as he towered over you. "plus..." your hand reached for the obvious tent growing in his pants, "you probably like that you're undermining my father's power by fucking his daughter during your lunch break."

"I think of it more as a bonus, most of the cases you ask me to cover are almost always some sort of impossible," he said before he placed a kiss on the corner of your lips.

You rolled your eyes, "well you always manage to get it done, don't you?" There you go again. Blue blooded, through and through. "Are you going to finish or...?"

"I have a meeting in ten minutes," he says with a sigh.

"... with me."

"And your father," he says as he tugged your pencil skirt to no longer be a clean sign of deviance, "wouldn't want daddy dearest to find me here alone with his CEO."

"Fine," you groaned as you leaned back on chair. You always had the most irresistible pout when you were denied what you wanted. "What about your little friend there?"

Nanami scoffed at the implication, "you were complaining about my *little* friend yesterday. I'll take care of it in the bathroom or something." You wanted to tease him for the imagery he painted in your head; His cold stoicism melting away as he fucked his fist, chasing a high that became harder and harder to satisfy on his own.

You picking up your phone and quickly dialed a number as Nanami watched you. "Hi daddy," you spoke sweetly, "I was just wondering if we could push back that meeting? I totally got food poisoning earlier and I was just about to go home." Nanami wanted to burst out laughing at your pathetic excuse, all just so that you could get your daily fuck in.

"Really? Oh thanks daddy... yes, I'll have Nanami take me home right away," you looked at him with a devious smirk before hanging up the phone.

"So I'm a personal chauffeur now?" Nanami teased as he stood by the door as you grabbed your coat, "what will my bonus be for that?"

"You act as if I didn't just do you a favor," you said as you slipped into your coat, "come on, I have to make it look at least a little believable." You leaned on his shoulder before he wrapped an arm around you and walked you to his car in the parking lot. The short walk and elevator ride felt hours long, even longer when Nanami got a call from his actual boss.

"Sir?" Nanami answered the phone, acting oblivious.

"Nanami! Would you be a pal and take my precious angel home and work from there? I'm sure they'll be so disappointed that they couldn't do work because they're a little sick," your father wasn't a successful business man because he was a smart man.

"Yes sir, I'll take them home right now," Nanami informed as he unlocked the car to let you in. You slipped into the front seat before he closed the door behind him. He hung up his phone as he entered the driver's seat.

"You know... we can't just leave right this moment," you leaned close to his ear. "Daddy will find it suspicious that you'd already have me on the road and stuff," your hot breath tempted him like no other.

"What are you suggesting?" He entertained your whims despite your recent bad behavior. You kissed his cheek as you undid his belt buckle. Nanami didn't move, not because he was particularly shocked at your choice of setting but rather to fully witness you at work. Your hand reached into his pants and wrapped itself around his dick. The warmth of your hand coupled with the sensitivity of his cock forced his head against the steering wheel as you kept a steady motion to taunt him. All Nanami could do is moan out a quiet, breathy, "fuck" and hope that you wouldn't tease him. You pulled your hand away with a mischievous giggle.

"Sorry, Nanamin," you're a liar, "we'll just have to wait until we go to the penthouse."

"...get in the back."

You laughed but it quickly faded when you looked at him again. His brows were furrowed with frustration as he removed his glasses. The green tinted glasses that once reflect you were shoved into the glove box haphazardly as Nanami motioned his head towards the backseat. You felt an unfamiliar heat rise in your chest but did as you were told and climbed into the backseat.

He starts the car wordlessly, driving out of the parking lot. You could practically hear the cogs in his brain churning as it settles to you that you pushed your luck too far. He pulled into your driveway an hour and finally looked at you.

"You think you can just toy with my cock as if it's just a plaything for you?" He climbed into the back with you, his fly and belt still undone. You didn't respond as you caught a glimpse of his tip peaking through his boxers. You bit your lip, hoping that he'll find it in his heart to forgive you and let you get a taste of the semen that stained his underwear. He sat down next to you and pulled his cock out.

"Suck."

His simple demand was listened to in full as you go on your knees and started slowly kissing his tip. Your slow tease grew impatience in Nanami as he grabbed the back of your hair and urged you to take his cock. He groaned softly as you took him in, inch by inch. You swirled your tongue and accepted the semen that had his familiar bitterness. You rubbed your thighs together but received a tug at your hair warning you not to push your luck again. You bobbed yourself up and down, looking up at him for approval as you felt yourself getting wetter and wetter.

"Just like that," he encouraged with a soft groan as he leaned his head back, "you're a good cock sucker, aren't you? Probably ruining my leather seating with how wet you are." You moved your head faster as you felt him twitch in your mouth.

"F-fuck, I'm so close," he panted, his hand following the bobbing of your head. Nanami forced your head down as he came, thick ropes of cum painted your throat white. You sat up and wiped your lip with a cocky smirk.

"You just had to have me, couldn't even wait until we were inside," you teased. Nanami glared at you as he attempted to catch his breath.

"You think you're done?"

[softnservile]

I'm scared and excited.

I am a trans girl, though I've lived most of my life as a guy, I spent the last ten+ years trying to figure shit out.

I am bi.

I'M HERE TO SEXT, NOT TO HIRE

I like:

* being degraded

* being controlled

* being fucked

* being used

* being overpowered

* Feet, musk, armpits. This doesn't apply to men as much but try me, please.

I don't like:

* sharing pics of myself (maybe some day, when I'm happier with myself, but for now it's a big rule)

* being reminded of my masculinity in any way (this includes being called a sissy!)

* being exploited (I am a broke queer in a broke country, it's physically impossible to profit from me, you're wasting both of our times)

* sph (I just don't care about my size, so it doesn't do anything for me, it's not degrading and therefore not hot)

* scat

* I don't really drink alcohol or do drugs. I'll rp about it if you want, but I won't actually do it.

* Similarly, I'll fantasize about all kinds of deranged shit (cnc, etc), but if it's something that will have real-world long-term consequences, it's staying as a fantasy. I'm happy to roleplay, just know I won't be actually doing that stuff (I WILL ABSOLUTELY do other stuff though! I have done nasty shit for random internet strangers)

Some of my biggest fantasies:

* Really strong muscular woman owns me, fucks me, controls me.

* Rich, spoiled woman makes me worship her and serve her.

* Being humiliated by a couple, a strong woman who won't fuck me because her girl is hotter and her hot brat girl who won't let me serve her because I could never please her like her strong girl.

* F/M married couple have me as their house servant/sex toy

Note: I talk about men and women for easy communication, people who don't fit these labels are v hot and can do whatevr they want with me.

Think this is all a lot? That I'm an entitled bitch with all my no-nos? You can always see if you can get me to break my rules, or get me into something new! I'm open to it, just don't me mad if I shoot you down, you're gonna have to earn me breaking my rules!

DMs are always open, but I'm not very active these days, so I might not reply