#tell me you wouldn't watch this show

[shinjiikar1]

I've been trying to think about what I want to say about these first two episodes of Love in the Big City. I'm watching it slowly, it's a show that makes me want to sit rather than rush ahead, and it also hits a little too close to home to enjoy freely (I've only watched the first two episodes so far and my knowledge of the rest of the story is fairly vague so bear with me).

Go Young experiences two major losses. The parallels between these losses, what could have been vs. what can never be again was what particularly stood out to me.

Mi Ae represents a beautiful time that is forever lost. After she gets married, there's no one he can be fully himself with. He simply doesn't have another relationship on that level, platonic or otherwise, and that's truly such an isolating experience. Who do you call when you're in trouble? Who do you complain to? Who will always be your first port of call?

Often, youthful friendships are particularly intense, you're at a point where the world feels so enormous but you don't quite know what to do with it, or yourself yet. Everything still feels new and exciting. You meet people who understand you in ways you've never been understood and can't imagine it won't last forever.

And then you experience that loss for the first time.

Kim Nam Gyu experiences it too. It's clear early in their relationship that Go Young is overwhelmed and uncomfortable with the intensity of Nam Gyu's feelings (his expressions during the padlock and ring scenes in particular). He feels suffocated and anxious, he's not ready for it. So, rather harshly (at least the first time) he ends things. I've been on both ends, which makes it a lot easier to empathize with both of them. While I feel for Nam Gyu incredibly (especially as I read him as very neurodivergent), that discomfort is not something easily resolved, and it's only made worse by his inability to move on. But how can he when he also has no one else?

In the end, Go Young mentions that he missed out on what could have been a long and lasting love with Nam Gyu but I wonder if that's true. Would he have eventually opened up and reciprocated that intensity? Or would he have continued to wallow in his discomfort and let that resentment pile up even further? It's hard to say, but based on the way he behaves, I think the latter. He just wasn't in a stage of life to accept it yet, without the experiences he has with Mi Ae, and without Nam Gyu's death, would he have made it to that point before it became too much? He says he didn't really believe love was possible for someone like him, it took him a lot to get to the point where he even starts to believe it; I find it hard to imagine that he could've gotten there purely through a relationship with Nam Gyu at that stage, as sad as that might be.

Mi Ae offers a bit of an interesting foil here. She chooses loss, but the loss of her authentic self. She chooses the safe option, a stable relationship and job, pleasing her parents, following societal expectations. Maybe the guy isn't quite right, but in the end what seems most important to her is that security, and she's willing to take a loss to get it. As others in the tags have pointed out, Go Young doesn't have that option. There is no option that will (mostly) guarantee him security and safety that would even be remotely tolerable and grant him any degree of happiness. Perhaps he could have chosen to lose parts of himself to be with Nam Gyu, but that wouldn't have provided him the type of security Mi Ae enjoys. If something went wrong and it didn't work out, he could stand to lose even more.

I think that's something that a lot of cishet people fail to understand, and part of what these episodes have done so well for me. Really underlining how the queer experience differs and how isolating it can be (which I think is reflected in Nam Gyu as well).

[maya-caffrey]

can we bring back procedurals? or at least just proper shows like how TV used to be? 5 to 15 seasons, a generous amount of episodes per season, 45 minutes: the sweet spot between too long and too short, pilot episodes that are wildly different from the rest of the show, filler episodes that overall contribute nothing but are extremely fun because that is what god intended, random musical episode, crossovers, waiting an entire week in anticipation to see what happens next, like, this was the PEAK of television, where did we go wrong

[queer-reader-07]

idk maybe it's the ace in me, but i really hate how so many people treat "in love" and "falling in love" as phrases that are exclusively designated for romantic love.

because i say CONSTANTLY that i'm in love with my friends. that i fell in love with them. because it encompasses more fully what i mean when i say i love them. i don't just love them, i'm in love with them. i exist in that love daily. i am held together by that love.

and to act like that kind of love, or rather, that way of conveying love is only for romance is so sad to me. because i think if we divorced those phrases from the connotation of romance, a lot more people would be talking about being in love with their best friends. in the most beautifully and deeply platonic way.

i don't know where this is going but tell your friends you love them! platonic love is beautiful and just as fulfilling as romance, don't let anyone downplay it

[shannonsketches]

like why did they change where Vegeta was when Cell announced the cell games in the anime

why did they make this vegeta starting shit with yamcha instead of chillin in the lab with his family? why did they take Bulma out of the lab? Why'd they say she was Out while Dr Brief was repairing 16? Why did they change Bulma working on advanced robotics to running in late with her baby?

it's the same scene except: - Bulma's actively at work being a scientist - Vegeta's not being rude to her (or anyone else!) - Vegeta waits for Trunks instead of leaving the room - Cell interrupted the airwaves, which means Trunks and Vegeta were just hanging out with Bulma and Dr B while they were working

Those are all Great Character Details!! That the anime rails against!!

[quirkle2]

What are your opinions/thoughts on the Body Improvement Club from mp100?

I personally adore them and love how unabashedly supportive of Shigeo they are. And they legitimately have helped me with personal motivation to exercise and just. Do stuff in general. My older brother and I have been occasionally exercising together since watching mp100 and "fight on!" has become our mantra when we start getting tired or don't want to do something.

I wasn't expecting them to be recurring characters but I'm so glad they are. I'm holding them so gently (despite them all being much larger than me)

i think they're wonderful!! my first watch through, i thought for sure when mob said he wanted to join the club they'd be like ://// abt it and both mob and i would have to endure suffering but no they r actually so supportive and genuine in said support

i think it's very wholesome that mob working so hard within the club "gives the rest of them courage" as musashi had put it during that wd arc fight. even if he's very tiny and unfit compared to them, and even if he does One Quarter of a pull-up, they r cheering him on. it's actually so nice that they support him sm. i wonder how mob would've reacted, if he'd been awake when musashi said that.

actually, staying on that scene, i don't see it talked about literally anywhere, but can we fuckign . talkabt that. can we speak about this. this guy was fully willing to die for mob. he was willing to lie down his life for a kid who joined their club maybe a couple of months ago. he was willing to get fucking crushed to death about it

i also rly appreciated when musashi tried to keep mob out of the black vinegar stuff after teru's arc. pretty much every scene with the body improvement club made me like them more and more—there was always some sort of new kindness to appreciate about them

[cuntvonkrolock]

i hate hate hate how people will see literally any gay male character and go "he would be a swiftie!!!". no he fucking wouldnt you just think all gay men are the exact same and like the same things.

[faksyan]

Have you ever looked at the list of autism traits and very confidently said well I don't have that one only to notice years later you are doing the fun leg movements from a show you just watched in your kitchen at six in the morning and you suddenly Get what they meant by copying body movements and stuff and surprise you've been doing it all that time actually and now you are Aware of it so your body feels weird but you also still want to do it so your brain just bluescreens. or is that too specific.

[lieutenant-amuel]

Elena of Avalor is genuinely such a good show.

[tenwhiteandalusians]

and then no one said anything about the fact that if i watched ONE MORE episode tenax pulls a "i'm not angry i'm just disappointed i'm hurt" about scorpus signing with the white faction.

[blujayonthewing]

the only thing worse than someone crawling up your ass about 'have you seen show yet? haaave you Seen Show Yet?? hey. heeeyyy. you should watch show you're gonna LOVE show when are you gonna Watch Show. what are you doing tonight are you busy right now you should watch show right now' until you are actively repelled by the idea of watching show is when you finally do and it is, just as you feared, Fine

[iguessitsjustme]

I have not watched it yet and won't be able to get to it tomorrow so I thought I'd make a poll.

Followers decide. If I do this then obviously I will write all about it.

[giantkillerjack]

ur post about queerbaiting and the dismissal of people in fandom to critical analysis is so incredibly true thank you. i feel like marcille's writing in the anime has been super misogynistic a lot of the time and every time i bring this up all anyone wants to say is "well maybe this isn't for you! and you shouldn't watch the show!" like. i don't think this is about taste lmao, i am analyzing the text in front of me and coming to conclusions about the craft of it.

[This is in reference to this post]

YES!!! THANK YOU!!!!!

It is so so frustrating!!!!

It's like being at a restaurant and being served a bunch of delicious appetizers, but then one of the bread appetizers is literally just a plate of crumbs; and then when you're like, "Hey, uhh, why are we being served literal crumbs?", a bunch of the other folks eating at the restaurant are like,

"WELL HOW ABOUT YOU JUST DON'T EAT HERE THEN??!? YOU MUST NOT BE THAT HUNGRY, SO JUST FIND ANOTHER RESTAURANT AND DON'T EAT WITH US!!"

And maybe they say it politely, but "Aw, sorry, maybe this restaurant just isn't for you 💖" is just trading out an aggressive dismissive tone for a patronizing dismissive tone. It's the same message.

And it's like! I was honestly happy to move on from the crumbs once my complaint was acknowledged because the meal overall is still delicious, but then all these folks got SUPER WEIRD AND DEFENSIVE ABOUT IT, so now I find myself double-checking all the other dishes -- and, actually, you know what those eggs DO look a Iittle misogynistic undercooked!!!!

[hakumizu]

Ugh how do I live in this house ＼(_ _)

Rant in the tags ignore me :3

[hadesknockedupintheunderworld]

You know, back a long time ago when I was actively participating in Sk8 fandom while the anime was airing, there was a lot of mentality abound of people expressing how badly they wanted to "save Tadashi from ADAM". And of course, at that time it always felt like it came from a good place. The excuse was that because Tadashi was "obviously being abused" (also, to note, the entire mentality was also based on the assumption that Tadashi was perfectly normal before Ainosuke broke him and turned him into a loyal puppet, which turned out to be an incorrect assumption), so of course people wanted to save him, right? As "any good person would" they just saw an abused and broken man and wanted to save him and rehabilitate him and help him realize that the life he's living is wrong–

Wait a minute. This is where we pause. By the time the show itself had ended (or season 1 rather) and all the context had been given, this mentality began to rub me the wrong way.

Why?

Because in this situation, people started from a very reasonable place of "I feel bad for what this character has been through" and transitioned to a place where the character is treated both like a real person who can receive harm, but also a baby with no agency. From a more irl angle, this fictional character is an adult man, which canon went to a number of lengths to show that he has learned a number of skills of his own accord so he could be the perfect secretary, and he has enough going for him that he doesn't need this secretary job to stay afloat. In other words, by the final episode, canon could not make it more perfectly clear that he knows his reality and continues to choose it. Even in his fictional reality, he doesn't need someone to kidnap him and "show him what true happiness is". But also, he's a fictional character and not a real person. It doesn't matter whether he chooses to be in a situation you think is terrible or not. Canon is the way it is because the author made it so. It does not conform to your comfortability or your wishes for the characters.

This is to say that what rubs me the wrong way of the mentality that Tadashi is a poor poor man who needs to be saved and fixed and shown true happiness is that people erase the agency he has in his own story as an adult who chooses what he wants and knows what will make him happy, and also treat him like a real person whom people have a moral imperative to save from his abuser. And they all do so ignoring canon about the situation that doesn't back up the idea that he either is hopelessly stuck as a victim (and needs saving) or is stuck as a victim and can't see it because he's broken (and needs saving).

"Now, hadesknockedupintheunderworld," you may be wondering. "You're predominantly a Sonic blog right now. What does this fictional secretary man from an anime that stopped airing in 2021 have to do with that."

To which I would say, "You know me, random person on the internet. This does have to do with Sonic the Hedgehog somehow!"

The reason I brought this up is to say that...the way the louder Sonic fandom treats Surge and Kitsunami rubs me the wrong way. Because you see this very similar mentality here.

"Oh poor Surge she was traumatized and abused. She's a bad person right now because she's reacting to trauma and doesn't know any better. She doesn't know that she's being bad, but as long as she becomes friends with Amy/Sonic they'll help her heal and teach her that what she wants is wrong"

"Oh, Surge knows what she's doing is bad and doing it on purpose? Well of course that's Starline's fault isn't it. She won't want to kill Sonic forever. She just needs to find her old family and take back her old identity and make friends with Amy/Sonic. This way she'll be able to become a hero and learn how to be a good person. She can't be happy unless she's a good person with family and friends! And there are so many characters who can save her."

"What? She's becoming a hero but still wants to kill Sonic? Oh, well. The first steps are taken, but she just needs the right people to lead by example. It's her destiny and future to be a good person, she just needs to be shown how"

"Poor poor Kitsunami, Surge was awful to him. He's so codependent with her due to Starline's programming, and she's so terrible to him. Practically abusing him. He's still following her because the poor baby has no choice! His programming keeps him from ever defying Surge, poor thing. But don't worry, Kit. One day you'll realize that the heroes are just trying to help you! And Tails will help you break through your programming and show you how to be a good person! And then you can heal without your pesky abuser forcing you to do things."

"Oh, he wants to be around Surge? No that's his programming he needs to break through. The poor kid simply doesn't know anything else and is a slave to his programming. That's why I need– I mean, he needs someone to save him and turn him into a good person."

"Surge is taking so many steps to being a good person and hero, but Kitsunami is concerning me. It's his fault that she's not a good girl and a full hero yet because he's going to basically become a secret villain so she can be a hero. God she's gonna be so pissed when she finds out he isn't being a good person and is causing problems for her to fix. I so sooooo hope this doesn't happen, but if he doesn't stop then he's gonna solidify himself as a villain and deserve whatever punishment he gets as a bad person. If IDW has any good writers at all, then Kit will finally become friends with Tails and the others and they'll teach him that he's wrong! Then he won't be so codependent on Surge and dragging her down and he can be of worth to society as a good person."

The similarities here are thus:

This character has gone through bad things/trauma and I feel bad for them.

I personally want to save them and wrap them up so they can heal and never deal with those things again

The only people who deserve happy futures are people who are good people (who I see as good people).

Because I like this character and want to save them, this means I want good things for them. They don't deserve good things unless they're good people, so I need someone to save them and make them better people.

If the character isn't a 100% good person (to me), then it's because they don't know any better and need to be shown by someone else what a good person is like. If the character does know better, well then all the more reason for someone to fix them and change them for their own sake.

I've decided that the situation the character is currently in is bad for them because it doesn't fit what I think would be a good and happy future if I was in their shoes. This means that they must be hopelessly stuck and forced in this situation somehow and need someone's help to escape it and be turned into a good person so they can have the good future I've picked for them. Anyone in their life I don't think is conducive to that future is a literal bad person.

Therefore the character doesn't know what's good for them like I do, but I can save them and make them happy. And if you don't agree that they need to be saved and fixed into model citizens (even against their current will) so they can be happy then you may as well be ignoring a real person who's being abused and crying for help. But also if they choose against my wishes for them time and time again maybe the narrative will kill them because they'll simply deserve to die at that point. Of course I hope that doesn't happen! This is why they must be saved!

What I'm saying is, like with Tadashi sk8, people have taken the mentality that Kit and/or Surge are poor poor guys who need to be saved and fixed and shown true happiness. They erase the agency the characters have in their own stories as free people who can choose what they want now and know what will make them happy, and also treat them like real people whom people have a moral imperative to save from their abusers or themselves or whatever they've decided the problem is. And they all do so ignoring canon about the situation that doesn't back up the idea that they either are hopelessly misguided (and need saving/fixing) or are stuck as a slaves to their own programming and can't see it because they're broken/don't know any better (and need saving/fixing).

[maddy-ferguson]

talking to new people again is making me realize that (this is gonna sound dramatic) i haven't lived in five years but what i have done is watch a lot of movies and read a bunch of books and believe it or not that actually makes me an interesting conversationalist in some ways (?)

[nexus-nebulae]

no but we need aroallo acceptance and casual hookup culture because then people will actually have the language to COMMUNICATE with their partner, hey i don't want this to mean anything romantically but i still wanna do this, and be able to casually talk about whether that's okay with both of you, instead of either secretly sleeping around or cheating or being stuck in a relationship that one person just isn't feeling