#tell me you wouldn't think the same

[corndogswhenever]

[inkskinned]

you're grabbing lunch with a nice man and he gives you that strange grimace-smile that's popular right now; an almost sardonic "twist" of his mouth while he looks literally down on you. it looks like he practiced the move as he leans back, arms folded. he just finished reciting the details of NFTs to you and explaining Oppenheimer even though he only watched a youtube about it and hasn't actually seen it. you are at the bottom of your wine glass.

you ask the man across from you if he has siblings, desperately looking for a topic. literally anything else.

he says i don't like small talk. and then he smiles again, watching you.

a few years ago, you probably would have said you're above celebrity gossip, but honestly, you've been kind of enjoying the dumb shit of it these days. with the rest of the earth burning, there's something familiar and banal about dragging ariana grande through the mud. you think about jeanette mccurdy, who has often times gently warned the world she's not as nice as she appears. you liked i'm glad my mom died but it made you cry a lot.

he doesn't like small talk, figure out something to say.

you want to talk about responsibility, and how ariana grande is only like 6 days older than you are - which means she just turned 30 and still dresses and acts like a 13 year old, but like sexy. there's something in there about the whole thing - about insecurity, and never growing up, and being sexualized from a young age.

people have been saying that gay people are groomers. like, that's something that's come back into the public. you have even said yourself that it's just ... easier to date men sometimes. you would identify as whatever the opposite of "heteroflexible" is, but here you are again, across from a man. you like every woman, and 3 people on tv. and not this guy. but you're trying. your mother is worried about you. she thinks it's not okay you're single. and honestly this guy was better before you met, back when you were just texting.

wait, shit. are you doing the same thing as ariana grande? are you looking for male validation in order to appease some internalized promise of heteronormativity? do you conform to the idea that your happiness must result in heterosexuality? do you believe that you can resolve your internal loneliness by being accepted into the patriarchy? is there a reason dating men is easier? why are you so scared of fucking it up with women? why don't you reach out to more of them? you have a good sense of humor and a big ol' brain, you could have done a better job at online dating.

also. jesus christ. why can't you just get a drink with somebody without your internal feminism meter pinging. although - in your favor (and judgement aside) in the case of your ariana grande deposition: you have been in enough therapy you probably wouldn't date anyone who had just broken up with their wife of many years (and who has a young child). you'd be like - maybe take some personal time before you begin this journey. like, grande has been on broadway, you'd think she would have heard of the plot of hamlet.

he leans forward and taps two fingers to the table. "i'm not, like an andrew tate guy," he's saying, "but i do think partnership is about two people knowing their place. i like order."

you knew it was going to be hard. being non-straight in any particular way is like, always hard. these days you kind of like answering the question what's your sexuality? with a shrug and a smile - it's fine - is your most common response. like they asked you how your life is going and not to reveal your identity. you like not being straight. you like kissing girls. some days you know you're into men, and sometimes you're sitting across from a man, and you're thinking about the power of compulsory heterosexuality. are you into men, or are you just into the safety that comes from being seen with them? after all, everyone knows you're failing in life unless you have a husband. it almost feels like a gradebook - people see "straight married" as being "all A's", and anything else even vaguely noncompliant as being ... like you dropped out of the school system. you cannot just ignore years of that kind of conditioning, of course you like attention from men.

"so let's talk boundaries." he orders more wine for you, gesturing with one hand like he's rousing an orchestra. sir, this is a fucking chain restaurant. "I am not gonna date someone who still has male friends. also, i don't care about your little friends, i care about me. whatever stupid girls night things - those are lower priority. if i want you there, you're there."

he wasn't like this over text, right? you wouldn't have been even in the building if he was like this. you squint at him. in another version of yourself, you'd be running. you'd just get up and go. that's what happens on the internet - people get annoyed, and they just leave. you are locked in place, almost frozen. you need to go to the bathroom and text someone to call you so you have an excuse, like it's rude to just-leave. like he already kind of owns you. rudeness implies a power paradigm, though. see, even your social anxiety allows the patriarchy to get to you.

you take a sip of the new glass of wine. maybe this will be a funny story. maybe you can write about it on your blog. maybe you can meet ariana grande and ask her if she just maybe needs to take some time to sit and think about her happiness and how she measures her own success.

is this settling down? is this all that's left in your dating pool? just accepting that someone will eventually love you, and you have to stop being picky about who "makes" you a wife?

you look down to your hand, clutching the knife.

[crabsnpersimmons]

"Hair dyes or perms or just a quick snip, you can always count on your ol' pal Clip!"

it's about time i officially shared my design for Clip from my hairdresser au! here's the silly boi himself!

a.k.a. the most complicated character i've ever designed...

close ups and additional comments under the cut!

that's my boi, despite his crazy design, i love him. his silly top knot hat, the horn-like points around his faceplate, his speckled colours, his four arms, and his funky pants. he's just soooooo fun.

Clip likes to play games and knit! he even made the patchwork pants he wears (he made Sun and Moon a pair too, but they're too precious for them to wear... also a little gaudy to wear in public—doesn't stop Clip tho!). He actually makes everything the boys wear, since there's not a lot of things in their size/shape.

instead of resting at night, he can be found in their living room, playing Kirby 64 for the nth time and/or knitting something. he's just too restless to stay still, he's always gotta be doing something and if it isn't gaming, knitting, or hairdressing, then he's up to No GoodTM.

Clip... likes popping balloons. he says "Goodnight!" with each popped balloon and once he's done, he tosses up the scraps like confetti all while giggling joyfully.

needless to say, he is not fun at parties. Sun and Moon don't let him near balloons for this reason.

and yes, he has sewing needles on hand at all times. for fashion emergencies... and for unsuspecting balloons.

Clip's not allowed to have a phone (just imagine all the in-app purchases Sun and Moon would have to deal with), but he likes to keep up with his customers and their games, even if he doesn't get their fixation over bluenets he'll never openly admit it but he prefers curly-haired blond hunks that look sweet in soft pastels but could also squash him like the spider he is

also, he's great at microbraiding! though i imagine if Sun and Moon are free, they'd come help to shorten the wait but also to compete and see who braids the most (Clip always wins of course—make anything into a game, and he's winning)

aaaaand there's this! i wanted to make sure Clip would be able to freely rotate his waist so his arms could have their full range of motion, and this was the solution i came up with: a crop top on top and a wrap around his waist. and Clip here is being a sneaky little scamp about it.

[feroluce]

I love the fact that the Silvermane Guards are essentially just a very devoted "We Love Gepard Landau" fanclub, and I desperately need for all of them to get into ship wars about it behind their Captain's back. The soldiers are all split into several factions:

Some of them ship him with Sampo 🛡💣 (enemies to lovers/hateship enjoyers; this does not necessarily mean they like Sampo- in fact it's more like most of them want to sic their Captain on him skzjsmdm)

Some of them ship him with Bronya 👑🛡 (knight and princess trope enjoyers and also a sorta-kinda "that is our mom and dad" type of deal; this faction gets riled up and ridiculously hypes Gepard up to Bronya every time she comes down to the frontlines mskdkxmd)

Some of them ship him with the trailblazer 🛡💫 (the smallest and newest faction, but steadily gaining!)

Some of them ship him with Pela ❄🛡 (workplace romance enjoyers; Gepard once charged out into the Fragmentum alone to save Pela from an expedition gone horribly wrong, and when this faction saw Gepard carrying Pela back princess style they threw a whole party)

Some of them ship him with Dunn 🛡🗡 (also workplace romance; Dunn is very flattered by this because yeah wrong Landau, but wow, the troops really think he's good enough to woo the Captain, what an honor)

And some of them ship themselves with the Captain 🛡❤ (yumejoshi enjoyers; this faction throws a massive group effort every Valentine's Day and are also all very supportive of each other)

The final faction is an odd one, because they're defined not by who they ship their beloved Captain Gepard with, but rather by who they don't ship him with. Their name is generally shortened to the A.B.S. Group- Anybody BUT Sampo 🚫💣 DKSZJJSMSOZ

[tiny-huts]

I am in complete agreement with the Astarion is (and all the other companions are) pan crowd. He is canonically pan and that should not be erased. But every post about it really needs to have at least one comment devaluing his attraction to men and denying the fact that he seems to have a preference for men (which is accurate to the lived experiences of bi/pan people. MANY people have a preference). Also many people need to realize that most people are not upset that you are having Astarion kissing your lady Tav but that most people are upset that many (not all) astarion x f!Tav works completely erase his more feminine mannerisms and stuff him into a tasteless hetero male love interest box which is like djddjjdjd not great and I do not trust it

[hopeswriting]

daily life arc miura haru. does anyone know who i'm talking about. do you guys remember her. i still can't believe what happened to her 😔

[0sbrain]

i think one of my least favorite troupes in tf2 fanfics has to be scout finds x and y are dating and freaks out/starts being openly homophobic towards them because "canon typical homophobia"

they are mercenaries. fucking contract killers. do you think anyone gives a flying fuck about homosexuality being illegal? you see, they are ok with murder and gruesome violence, HOWEVER they draw the line at two men holding hands because the words on the paper say it's a no no

he would probably tease them because, that's normal that's what friends and annoying coworkers do. and sometimes he might step on a line. but my dear friends. if scout was genuinely homophobic to any of the other mercs, im afraid he wouldn't survive the winter (irse a mimir). he would get snapped by a twig and it doesn't even have to be by the merc he was insulting. anyone in the vicinity would suplex his ass. son, we all suck dick here. get used to it

[grapetriip]

anyone up for bg3 aftg au w dark urge neil

[front-facing-pokemon]

[sciderman]

it feels quite poetic to read about how you prefer writing the blog over drawing it. you put so much effort into the art, and you've built your entire career around art, but it feels like your passion lies on the side of literature. i'm kind of going through the reverse, where i'm pursuing a higher education in writing but have recently wondered if i should've done animation instead because i love it so damn much.

i dunno. life is weird.

heh! it is a funny old world - i mean, i've always loved writing, and i actually have been writing long before i got into drawing. i used to write short stories as a kid. like a little freak. what kid is into writing. but i was. but the only person who was ever interested to read my stories was my dad. you know, if a kid hands a page of words at you what are you gonna do with it. my dad thought i was awesome, though. i think he was extra proud because he's a writer too. thought his little one was following in his footsteps. i fancied myself a little novelist. but you know. it was hard to get people to want to read my stories.

there was another kid that was good at drawing that got all the attention. and i said. "well. i could do that." and so then i started drawing. i started making comics, really. i took my stories and drew them out, and suddenly people got interested in my stories.

everyone is so alice-coded. you know.

i made comics. i rarely drew without there being a story and dialogue attached to it. i filled sketchbooks upon sketchbooks with comics. it wasn't really art for art's sake - it wasn't because i wanted to get good at drawing - not really, it was a vessel for my jokes and for my stories. so no matter how crude the illustrations were, it was fine as long as i got the joke or story across. i think you might notice that with my comics still - they're not very polished and i don't labour a lot of time over the art, i don't really care to render everything perfect - i like things loose and quick and imperfect. i'm not very precious. as long as it gets the story across.

so it's funny, really - i started drawing because i wanted to spotlight my writing and get people to read it. i just have to spoon feed it to people, is all. sweeten the deal with pretty pictures. then people will read. so i never left writing. never, never. it was kind of always at the heart of everything i did. i guess i pursued animation because it was a marriage of a lot of things i was interested in. writing, storytelling, drawing - and acting. i was a stupid little theatre kid. and to be a good animator, or any kind of visual storyteller, i think - you need to be a good actor. and you need a good sense of humor. if you don't have those things, you'll be a rotten animator, i think.

i think i'm still in the place where writing was my first love, and i enjoy it the most - but, still in the place where - when there aren't pictures attached, you don't get people's attention. and i love attention.

for a time i really thought i should quit animation and pursue a career in screenplay writing - but, i don't... really know how to go about it. and i'd definitely miss art. i really really love things like character design and visual development and visual storytelling far too much to restrict myself to writing exclusively. but - i don't know, in my free time, when i'm not on the clock, well - writing is more laid back, and more relaxing. less taxing. so i enjoy doing it more. in my free time.

(it may also be because writing isn't a huge part of my day job, so it feels more like an escape. that's why i don't really animate at all when i'm not getting paid for it. i don't do animation for fun. i have fun doing it, sure, but i won't do it unless i'm cutting a check from it. because i don't have the energy for it otherwise. if i'm not making money, i want to do something relaxing, that doesn't feel like work. and that's writing.)

[pinktoonie]

Of course his eyes are on Kazuki, watching his reaction to Miri with her mom, reading him like an open book as usual. He hates seeing Kazuki distraught and he knows it's killing him. But Rei stays quiet.

However, this seems like a moment where Kazuki is saying something on top of the ferris wheel, that gets quite a reaction from Rei. He's probably resigning to the idea that they need to let Miri go (which btw fuuuuck that and the mom) despite how much it'll hurt. I'd think it was some sort of admission (cuz ferris wheel heh romantic), but Kazuki is glum af and Rei reacts kind of angrily (determined?) in addition to shock to whatever he says. Idk, but

Rei isn't going to let this family go without a fight. He has something worth protecting.

[marcsnuffy]

Using Lorenzo and Charles' interviews as reference, I'd love to see any assumptions of what Kaiser and Ness would answer here

[steakout-05]

i'm actually so surprised that in the many years of Siivagunner existing, they haven't made a single Jetpack Joyride rip yet. like. there are so many stupid jokes and mashups you could make with it. they've made plenty of rips of mobile games like Angry Birds and Subway Surfers, so it's kinda shocking that there aren't any Jetpack Joyride rips considering it's one of the most recognisable mobile games ever.

[nonokoko13]

Posting my OTP propaganda on Tumblr as well

Edit: for those who doesn't know spanish. The song Jade sings is a fragment of "Malas decisiones" by Kenia. Here's the translation:

Jade: ♪You know what happens♪ [Sabe lo que pasa]

♪when we are alone♪ [cuando estamos solos]

🥰

♪today I got pretty to see you♪ [hoy me puse linda para verte]

♪and you are lucky♪ [y tú que estás con suerte]

♪I don't want tequila, I want that one♪ [no quiero tequila, quiero a ese]

♪I don't even know what he has ♪ [que yo ni sé que tiene]

Shroomy:

PLEASEEEEE [POR FAVORRRRR]

CALL THE POLICE 😫 [LLAMEN A LA POLICÍA]

HE'S KILLING MEEE [ME ESTÁN MATANDOOO]

(It says *they are actually but in this context *he's)

😭

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[lloydfrontera]

related to that last post that's kinda why i think cpsm revealing that javier had died three years earlier than lloyd is poignant in a very understated way.

javier's original fate was to live when everyone he cared about didn't. he was meant to be the protagonist of that world, to face all kind of threats and survive all of them, but with no one at his side.

he's the narrative's favorite but the narrative's love is not gentle and it is not kind and it will hold you close until you suffocate under its themes and parallels. for the world would bend itself for javier to be at it's center but it would not allow him the comfort of sharing that spot with anyone else.

he was always meant to be the last one standing. fate won't kill him but it won't allow him to die either.

and then comes lloyd with his plot breaking meddling saving everyone around them and shoving his way into the protagonist role, sharing the burden javier wasn't even aware he was carrying. and fate tries so hard to correct itself, it tries by all means possible to put things back the way they were meant to be, but in the end the best it can do is to try and make it so there will only be one main character in the world. the way it was always meant to be.

it concedes. it won't take away everything from its favorite anymore. but it won't stand for there to be two of them.

and the thing is. it wins. it gets what it wants. in the end javier can't save lloyd, he can't take his place, he can't keep him alive, he has to stand and watch him sacrifice himself for everyone else. for javier himself. in the end when the battle is over javier is again the last one standing.

when lloyd comes back and the fate restoration doesn't start up all over again, he thinks it's because lloyd frontera's original body disappeared and he came back in his own body. i don't think it was that. i think the reason fate didn't try to restore itself again is because it had already achieved what it wanted.

the narrative won. not completely. not the way it was originally meant to. but in the end javier ended up as the lone protagonist who watched his loved one die before his eyes.

only then was it satisfied and allowed javier to leave its grasp. only then was he allowed to become a person and not just the main character.

a person who could spend a lifetime with all of his loved ones and when the time came, die peacefully in his sleep, knowing at least the person he came to care the most about will outlive him. at least this time, he won't be the one left behind.

[miodiodavinci]

every day that goes by i relate more and more to that post that's like "is the video essay analysis or is it summary → it's a good essay sir → open the video → it's summary"