#tcw made clones the same as anakin

[archivistofnerddom]

So, I was just re-watching the Bad Batch intro arc of the Clone Wars, and a thought struck me.

When Anakin, Rex, Echo, and the Batch are trapped on that pipe, Anakin (sarcastically) asks if anyone has a brilliant idea for an escape attempt . . . and then Tech pipes up that he does have a brilliant idea (thank you so much for asking, General Skywalker). And it turns out that Tech’s idea is completely batshit (ha!) nuts and Utter Ludicrous (TM).

Like, Anakin’s just standing there, clearly thinking, “Wait, that was an option? Flying out on these lizard creatures was so far done on the list of possible solutions that I didn’t even consider it . . . and I’m always involved in coming up with the Ridiculous Plans (To Succeed). This is crazy, even for me.”

And then I realized — Tech just out-Anakin-Skywalker-ed Anakin Skywalker. He surprised the guy who is known across the galaxy as being the hero without fear. Anakin got a taste of what it’s like to deal with his improvisations and plans that shouldn’t work (but somehow do).

I really hope he had a moment of clarity and self-reflection, where he thought, “Oh, so this is what that feels like. Obi-Wan was right. Dealing with someone who has a penchant for Ridiculous Plans is stressful!”

And perhaps, Obi-Wan felt an overwhelming sense of satisfaction back on Anaxes when Anakin’s realization rippled back to him through the Force.

[nakaremfarlei]

Was just thinking about the amount of animals Obi-Wan interacts with compared to literally everyone else and in the Clone Wars episode where Kamino gets attacked he literally gets saved twice by the same ray-like animal and just...

The growth from judging Qui-Gon for the 'pathetic lifeforms' he picks up to whatever he has going on during the Clone Wars era. He must have gotten that from Qui-Gon though, right?

And because it's my brain and it's rotting with all the star wars stuff I am consuming I was thinking of Obi-Wan saving all these creatures and the 212th having to deal with that. Surely they made one of the rooms pet proof in case one of them needs a new home. There also have to be clones who love that because of course Obi-Wan can't really take care of rescues on top of all his duties.

After the first few times this happens Cody learns to order animal food and other necessities. And if the Republic doesn't fulfill these requests or asks too many questions he'll just have to make sure to organize them on planet during the campaigns.

[starbeltconstellation]

I’m fr at my limit. 😭🤷‍♀️😬

This is why the Pro Jedi SW fix-it fic I’m writing is my free therapy. 😂

any version of “the jedi got what was coming to them” completely invalidates all of your opinions on them to me. btw ���️

[skywalkr-nberrie]

I just love how in the SW novels or any other extended content it’s more clearer that Anakin and Padmé specifically choose missions they know the other will be on to join. Whether it be Anakin as her guard, or Padmé as his ally.

We see in Forces of Destiny that Anakin tries to get missions as Padmé’s bodyguard.

So we can assume that this becomes a thing between the two of them 🤣 trying to hack missions they’re both on to be together more. I mean, if it was up to them? They’d be attached at the hip 24/7.

Even in TCW, we see Padmé making moves to get Anakin on the same missions she’s on, asking Yoda and Mace to send OW and “Skywalker” because she’ll be needing Jedi aid for her excursion 😏 and we see the same thing take place in Brotherhood, when Anakin and Padmé go out on a date. Though in the BH novel, she knows it’d be easier for her to secretly go on a date with her husband than spend time with him on duty where they’re still trying to hide from the gaze of others.

Well, you guessed it! This unspoken deal between them extends to even the other novels too! Like here in Secrets of the Jedi. Palps tells Anakin that Padmé personally chose to go on the mission that Anakin was sent on, despite that Anakin was afraid and didn’t want Padmé to come, we see how his mind later changes after talking it out with Padmé. He tells her that he won’t leave her side and she responds in kind by saying that this was exactly what she wanted. (For him to never leave her side.)

And later on in the same novel, now on the mission, Anakin decides he’s gonna do some exploring on the ship they ended up on. Right after Padmé not so discreetly says she’ll “join him” masking her reasoning with “mission investigation.”

Further into the novel now, Anakin advises Padmé to return to Coruscant for her own safety, requesting her, and silently begging with his eyes for her to listen to him. Triggering the topic between them of how they hate to be apart from one another and that it’s so hard to live this life, despite that they’ve already decided long ago that it was worth it to belong to each other.

Padmé wanted to stay on the mission and be alongside Anakin, but she inevitably listens to his plea and goes back.

However, the reasoning behind Padmé wanting to stay on missions with Anakin isn’t just to spend time with him, but also it’s also parallel to Anakin’s reason for wanting her to stay back and away from the danger. She can’t bare to be with him go away, and she can’t follow. She has to see him or else she’ll go “crazy” worrying over him. This is also one of the reasons why she drowns herself in work whenever she can’t join him. (Excerpt from Star Wars, Clone Wars Gambit: stealth.)

And this is why Padmé encourages Anakin to take her with him when he’s on missions, as shown here in Queen’s Hope.

They just never want to be separated from one another, and I just love a clingy and madly in love cute couple, okay! They’re made for each other!

[jedi-enthusiast]

Hello. How are you?

Can you raise an explanation as to why The Jedi Padawans were sent to fight on the front lines alongside The Clones and Jedi Knights/Masters, please?

Of course, the Padawans need Masters but I'd assume there would probably be enough inside The Temple to teach them, despite the war...

I know The Jedi wouldn't want to send their children onto the front lines, so I'm trying to think of how they'd ended up there anyway.....

Thanks in advance (if you do have an explanation. If not, thanks anyway).

Good night/morning!

Hey, I'm doing alright---I'm sick rn, but I'm hoping that it'll pass soon so I can get back to my normal shenanigans <3

So the out-of-universe explanation is just that TCW was a show made for kids and so there are gonna be kid characters doing all the cool fighting and battle stuff. Is it pretty unrealistic? Yeah, but this is also a show set in space with magic powers and laser swords lol

In-universe things get a little more complicated and we kind of have to make our own assumptions based on what we already know.

In TPM we see that children...aren't really treated like children, from a young age they're actually treated more like teenagers or even adults. Padme is the queen of an entire planet at 14, a job so dangerous that she has 12 body-doubles who pretend to be her so she doesn't get killed, ready to die in her place---body-doubles who are probably of a similar/the same age. Anakin is allowed to compete in a pod-race on Tatooine at age 9, a race that is shown multiple times to be dangerous and get people killed, and it's treated as completely normal by both his mother and his opponents.

So we can probably deduce that, while the children are obviously still children, they're expected---and shown---to be more capable and independent than they would irl. They hold a level of maturity and responsibility at a younger age, and this is completely normal in the SW universe.

So the explanation is that padawans' ages don't really come into question.

We see from how Anakin and Obi-Wan react to Ahsoka, who is 13 in TCW movie, when she introduces herself as a padawan---they're shocked and view her as too young to be one, with Anakin continuously calling her a "youngling." From that, we can deduce that generally padawans are older than 13 and---in a universe where a 14 year old is seen as mature enough to rule a planet and other 13-15 year olds are mature enough to possibly die for said ruler---taking a padawan who is, say, 15+ into battle isn't really odd or seen as morally questionable.

As George Lucas says regarding Ahsoka being brought into the war, "she's being trained as a Jedi Knight, she's got this."

And so do all of the other padawans, maybe more so since a lot of them are probably older than her. They're Jedi, they're not younglings anymore, they can handle the responsibility and---if they can't---they're still just students and their master is right there to protect and teach them.

That seems to be the canon intention, at least. If you want to take a more nuanced look at it through the lense of them actually being children, rather than the canon intent of them being more mature children who can handle these things, you're probably going to have to come up with your own reasons why the Jedi would bring the padawans into it. In my fics, I usually go with the idea that the Jedi didn't have much of a choice, just due to what their training is/does as well as different concerns with leaving them at the Temple, as well as pressure from the Senate to have "every Jedi available" on the front lines---but you can obviously do something different, if that doesn't sing to your tune.

I hope my ramble answered your question <3

[kcrabb88]

QuinObi Fic Rec List

QuinObi week isn't until October, but like I did last year, I wanted to drop some of my favorite QuinObi fics to get y'all excited! This list is not exhaustive, just a starter, but I hope you'll enjoy!

Hush by @violentcheese: a gorgeous Padawan first kiss fic! Made me a bit teary, tbh.

Don't Waste Your Treat by @ninjigma: Obi-Wan and Quinlan are on a diplomatic mission. They bicker over a popsicle and are very into each other. This fic had me sweating. <3

Flu Season by @coruscantrhapsody: Padawan Obi-Wan has a huge crush on Quin (which is definitely returned). A QuinObi Week 2023 fic by my bestie

Reach For My Hand by jelucan: Quinlan was presumed dead but it turns out he wasn't. He and Obi-Wan wander through Coruscant and have feelings. This is one of my personal fave fics for these two.

With a Little Help From My Friends by @palfriendpatine66: Quin, Obi-Wan, and Siri are best-friends-with-benefits. A piece from last year's QuinObi week that I adored!

On Your Best Behavior by wanderingjedihistorian: Obi-Wan and Quinlan accidentally get married on a mission. Why not have a wedding night?

To Our Halcyon Days by @lothcatthree and @krispyscreams: Obi-Wan and Quin reunite during the empire when Quin finds out their son Cal is alive. A great and super romantic multi-chapter!!

Shaking From Holding You Back by @ashinaburrito: Obi-Wan rips Tarkin a new one when he's rude to Cody, and Quinlan thinks that's hot. Smut ensues in a closet.

Counting to Coruscant by @fanfic-phoenix. This whole series is WONDERFUL and has everything from Padawan Obi-Wan and Quinlan to their lives during the war (and the moments of romance they're able to snag) to the aftermath of Rako Hardeen. Super super recommend!

Red and Orange Beacons Go Forth by @ashinaburrito: Quinlan gets caught in a psychometric vision and Aayla calls Obi-Wan for help.

Betrayal by @brachiosaurus-on: Obi-Wan and Quinlan reunite in the OWK show era. Beautiful, Beatiful fic.

Ride Around the Moon for a Velvet Kiss by blackkat: Snarky and wonderfully in character smut set during the Clone Wars.

Stumbling on the Way Home by CapGirlCanuck: a comics based one-shot that pays homage to Obi-Wan and Quinlan's long friendship. Lovely.

The Beach by @lilywhoisapotato: Stranded on an uninhabited planet, Obi-Wan blames himself for their predicament. Luckily, Quinlan knows how to cheer him up.

Liability by KCKenobi: Quinlan takes care of Obi-Wan after Qui-Gon's death.

Everything They Shouldn't Be by @noncanonship: After Obi-Wan's Starfighter suffers an unplanned fall out of hyperspace, he finds himself stranded near Karfeddion, exactly where Quinlan Vos is on a longterm undercover mission. Obi-Wan intends to avoid Quinlan in order to protect his cover, but the Force has other plans.

I'm going to be annoying and include a few of my own QuinObi fics (there are many because I love these two but I won't list them all):

Kill the Lights: Fix-it that centers on changing the Fives incident in TCW. Quinlan searches for a captive Obi-Wan with Anakin, Padme, and the Jedi's help. Featuring huge amounts of QuinObi (with lore I created based lightly off the Orpheus and Eurydice myth, but happier in the end).

Blood Makes Noise: My QuinObi-centric AIDS Crisis AU set in 80s/90s New York.

After the War (Part the First): It's Quinlan who goes on the Rako Hardeen mission.

After the War (Part the Second): Obi-Wan and Quin reunite via the Hidden Path

Always a Little in Love: Post-Geonosis. Quinlan bursts into Obi-Wan's room to yell at him for almost getting killed. Obi-Wan wants to forget about the war in it's infancy. Feelsy smut ensues.

Forty Years of Knowing: Obi-Wan and Quin commit to each other and extremely tender smut happens. Set in my RoTS fix-it verse but can be read on it's own.

Shoulder the Sky Verse: My RoTS Fix-It verse, including the initial RoTS AU of the same name, and it's sequel, Whispers from the Dead, as well as several one-shots. STS features QuinObi friends-with-benefits-to-exclusivity and WFTD has them in a committed relationship (and said relationship is a big part of the fic).

[marvelstars]

Anakin Skywalker vs Jedi identity

I have seen many takes I consider bad about Anakin because they are based more on a narrative trope than about the character in the movies but recently I found another one I thought was interesting to analyse.

This idea that Anakin would have forgotten all about the well being of others if he choose to marry Padme and leave with her resigning to his place in the Jedi Order.

This take presumes just because Anakin(and Padme) wish to have a family, make their relationship official and raise their children on their own home instead of sending them to the Jedi order, a perfectly normal and fair aspiration by all measures considering their actual work dedicated to the Jedi Order and the Republic absorbed their childhood, this somehow means Anakin no longer cared about other people because he left the Jedi and the Jedi are involved while he is selfish and only wanted to be a Jedi for fame and the cool lightsaber, an understable take if you are looking at him as a jock trope but that is not the character from the movies, novels, comics or TCW.

For Anakin, the character in the movies, being a Jedi was secondary to freeing the slaves on Tatooine, it was secondary to freeing his mother, secondary to seeking peace in the galaxy, secondary to helping the clones, while at the same time, he had a big amount of respect towards the Jedi beliefs, so much that he bassically memorized their philosophy, he is actually the only main character other than Yoda who talks about Jedi philosophy in PT outside of the context of duty to the Republic and he uses those arguments to defend the Jedi Order from Palpatine´s criticisms , in fact in TPM , in his child mind, being a Jedi was his means towards achieving this ideal of freedom in the outer rim, for Anakin being a Jedi was never an end on itself, it was a means towards making lasting changes.

"I had a dream, I was a Jedi, I came back here and freed all the slaves" - Anakin Skywalker

It´s interesting for me because if anything Anakin´s problem when it comes to other people is that he cares so much that the Jedi often had to convince him to leave them behind, be it his Mom, Padme, clone troopers, his padawan, etc. His issue with the Jedi Order wasnt their involvement in helping others, that´s what he admired of them, his issue was their detachment often meant him abandoning family or leaving behind people who needed help because of this ideal of a higher duty, the many over the few or the one.

For example, that time he disobeyed orders to go investigate an objective for the republic army and discovered their information was incomplete and they were about to bomb civilians that had been made slaves by the separatists so he went to rescue them before doing their attack.

This personal characteristic of Anakin would not have changed if he left the Jedi Order to live with Padme, he still would have this urge to do anything in his power to help, because that´s simply who he is as a person since he was a young child, he wants to help, he likes to help, this is why he helped Padme get to her planet, that´s who he is and as much as he respects the Jedi, he can still help even if he left the Order.

I believe Yoda was right when he rejected Anakin from the Jedi Order at the start of TPM, not because Anakin didn´t have Jedi aptitudes, he already had a lot of them but those were not developed in the context of the Jedi Order, with a Jedi teacher, he learned them from his mother, from seeing the injustice on Tatooine, from wanting to do something about it. Anakin was already too involved with the world outside the Jedi Order as a child for him to adapt to the ways of the Jedi Order or to be content just following the Jedi Code for the rest of his life and this conflict between duty to the Order, to his family, to his friends was exploited by Palpatine.

So in a world in which Anakin married Padme and went to live with her, I don´t believe he would have cared much about losing his Jedi status, because that always had been secondary to his main ideals, which were to make a difference in the galaxy he lived and he would have seek to make that difference married to Padme or not.

This is also why I don´t see him at all as a stay at home Dad/Husband, the moment he was free to explore his own projects he definitely would have tried to make his childhood dream a reality and he definitely would have done so with Padme´s support and whoever wanted to join, he was a child slave who managed to help a Queen and a Jedi with his talents and good will alone, that´s who he is and that didn´t change.

[phoenixyfriend]

Star Wars AU Masterlist: General AUs

Navigation Post

Fun fact, tumblr allows 250 links on the old editor and 100 in the new. So. Network of masterlists. This is one of sixteen masterposts I have for Star Wars. These are just the most ‘generic’ of the AUs.

(Also this post has been randomly deleted at least once so uhhhh great thanks to the wayback machine holy shit.)

RANDOM AUS IN CANONVERSE

Misconceptions AU

Fem!Obi-Wan - not the same AU, but related: hair and makeup

Magically attractive Obi-Wan

Obi-Wan is Immortal (and it’s not great for his self preservation)

Padme/Sabe timeline

Jedi who leave the Order as a way to save it

“AUs where Obi-Wan gets adopted by Mandalorians” but I made it pro-Jedi and also Obitine

I did not know that about Haiti, whoops

Omegaverse Jedi should be LESS intense about sexism, not more

Pre-TPM

Obi-Wan fakes his death on Melida/Daan

Dooku knows Jango before Galidraan AU

Slutty Xanatos

Sharad Hett finds baby Anakin in Mos Espa and has to Deal With That

Shake that (Stewjoni) Bagpipe - various instruments with various characters

Anakin & Obi-Wan age swap, ft. Anakin and Satine being saltmates

Mand’alor Satine

Rael finds and keeps Komari - Expanded

Force-Sensitive Satine Kryze

Xanatos-Obi age swap (Xanatos/Bo-Katan)

Aayla/Bo-Katan meet during The Year On The Run

Quinlan meets toddler Anakin pre-canon, and Obi-Wan has a contact on-planet (Shmi) when TPM comes around

Raised a Sith Anakin, except Dooku snaps up Anakin and his mom from Mustafar since he’s better at Childcare than Sidious (who is annoyed at this situation)

That time Qui-Gon turned into a tree (via @willowcrowned, with fic by @smilebackwards)

Pre-TCW

Anakin&Obi-Wan, Jedi Stuff

Anakin’s paternal DNA came from Palpatine via Sith Magic

Anakin Skywalker, Secret Son of a Disgraced King

* Kick Up Your Heels - The Summary

Drag Queen AU - Oh, That’s Just Ben

Obi-Wan Wins a Moon

Tiniest Assistant Teacher

Anakin Loses his Connection to the Force, Time For Career Guidance - Addendum

Amnesiac Qui-Gon

Taking out Obi-Wan Kenobi (MaulObi)

Murder Puppy Anakin

Anakin the Snake - This AU is in the Wider AUs masterlist

One of several reasons Qui-Gon may not have been the best teacher for Anakin

Anakin’s teenage rebellion

Through strange coincidence, Obi-Wan and Shmi are actually stepsiblings

The Jedi are Kyber

Best masters for Anakin when Obi-Wan and Mace aren’t available

Obikin Sleeping Beauty AU - TCW Anakin finds a hot guy in cryo, turns out it’s Qui-Gon’s missing padawan from like twelve years ago

Mandalorian and Clone Stuff

Bo-Katan Decides She’s Siding With Family

* Kamino Belongs to the Clones (ft. banana)

Secret Clones AU

Anakin finds the clones a year early

In which Bo-Katan, or possibly Jango, breaks the cycle of violence that raised them

The Darksaber Picks Satine

Sith&Other Stuff

Ventress vs. Absolute Primogeniture

Maul ‘acquires’ Ferus Olin

Dooku Acquires a YA Sith Maul, following up on Sidious’s notes: I can teach you the ways of the Dark Side. Dooku, following literal decades of habit: …I can domesticate him.

Dooku becomes Count of Serenno… and brings the Jedi with him

Dooku hasn’t Fallen yet, and adopts teen Ventress, who has

An Accountant in Theed

Parenting Focus

Obitine Raise Anakin, ft. Grampa Dooku

* Mand’Alor Korkie Kenobi

The secret accidental Obitine baby isn’t Korkie, it’s Bo-Katan - Bokkin addendum

Obitine’s Pregnancy Scare

Obi, Protect Them

She’s Little Sister Shaped

Power Limiter Robes

Quinlan’s Smear Campaign

Artoo and Threepio adopt Boba

* Congratulations, Master Jinn, It’s a Boy!

Anakin isn’t human and reproduces via Space Parthenogenesis (and possibly lays an egg)

A “Stewjoni are all capable of pregnancy” fic where Obi-Wan offers to have Bail and Breha’s heir for them

Calligraphy I prompted from @theshitpostcalligrapher

Bo-Katan is Korkie’s bio mom, but got him removed to finish gestation in a tube (like clones) as soon as she found out because she was sixteen and not at all ready

Transmasc Obi-Wan babytraps ‘escaped Naboo intact’ Maul, who is now having difficulty deciding what to do with himself - Why we love MaulObi

TCW

Main: Anakin

Anakin Assists the Jedi Council While On Medical Leave (with a Horrible Miscommunication Addendum by @willowcrowned) - Now with a longform (and really good) fic on AO3! Sith Lightning, Paperwork, and Other Extreme Sports by @deadstarsrisingsblog

Chip Reactivation AU

The Romance Movie Curse - Ficlet written by @chaoticevilbean

Deserters? What deserters?

Anakin accidentally used the Force to make people like him, and is now panicking in an attempt to undo All of it (especially Padme)

Mace gets de-aged, hooks up with Anakin (much to the distress of Obi-Wan and Depa)

* Ficlet: Because I Fell Too

In for a Penny (Anakin confesses to the Tuskens)

Truth Serum AU (Anakin confesses to the Tuskens) - It’s all fun and games until it isn’t

In Which Palpatine Leaves the Door Open (Anakin confesses to the Tuskens) - A conjugal visit

Voluntary servitude (slavery) as the highest form of penitence and reparation on Tatooine, Anakin’s apology to the Tuskens - A different response - The context of Anakin’s childhood

Anakin invents a twin brother

Undercover Anakin&Mace have to pretend to be father and son

Anakin becomes aware of the fourth wall and ‘solves’ his problems by leaking nudes and otherwise fucking up his life “The way to break free of a story’s gravity is to consider every possible option and then pick the one that makes the absolute least sense.”

Sith Heir Anakin arranged marriage to second daughter of Mandalore Bo-Katan

Everyone Anakin meets is obsessed with keeping him safe post-Mortis and he hates it (horror)

Main: Obi-Wan

Mandalorian Mamma Mia (AKA Korkie lies about his dad)

(Most Obi-Wan focused AUs are in other lists).

Main: Ahsoka

Ahsoka gets Winter-Soldiered (This already exists and is much better than I could have managed)

Artificially Evil Ahsoka (Mortis had some lasting effects)

Ahsoka accidentally becomes a Film Noir Private Detective after leaving the Jedi, and derails all of Palpatine’s plots

Ahsoka’s crush on Barriss is “notice me senpai”

Bosoka arranged marriage when?

Main: Disaster Trio

Ghost on the Wire AU

* Anakin’s DNA Wish

Even Ventress Sees You’re Dad - Anakin talks too much

Disaster Lineage on SpaceTube

SW Prequels “Watch Your Own Series” AU (chrono)

Anakin & Barriss

Obi-Wan joins Dooku in AotC as a ploy to gather information, fails upwards

Anakin Accuses Obi-Wan of being Blonde

Sudden Soulmarks

Ahsoka accidentally outs Palpatine as a Sith through the use of incomprehensible emoji jibberish

Main: Clones

In which Cody and Rex Accidentally God-Mode - Kix Fights Rex’s Blood

Furbie the Coruscant Guard

Clint and Matt

Ghost Kitten Clones

Keep the Jedi Out of It, now with art by @lemoneste

In Which Fox Arrests His Boss - On a Technicality

Bly’s Glitching Brain Chip

Commander Fox is the Organas’ sugar baby (non-sexual, mostly)

Rex/Ventress - stranded together

Sponsor a Battalion

Fox arrests some senators for littering

Cody and Fox become building safety inspectors post-war

Clones deserve to be frat boys. Also date Anakin.

Rex/Barriss, in which Barriss is Fucked Up (but trying to do better)

Echo takes Dogma under his wing

Main: Other

Sidious and the Worst Kidnapping Ever

Who Gave Ventress the Keys? - Additions by others

Yoda commits a murder, blames the dementia

Shrink ‘em

Necromancied Qui-Gon kidnaps Ventress (she’s a Free Grad Student) - Addendum

Ventress Gets Married to Fuck Up Sidious’s Day

Dookasta interviews/negotiations, TCW as the galaxy’s ugliest divorce

Korkie picks up the Darksaber, and sees Dead Mand’alore

Satine manages to piss off both sides of the war by taking in defecting clones

Parenting Focus

Ahsoka Steals a Baby

Rattatak Death Swap

Baby 501st Legion

Oh, So THAT’S What People Think

Fairy Jango Fett

* Big Sis ‘Soka

Anakin volunteers to be a surrogate (the timing is… not optimal)

Trans Anakin explains that he is NOT the father

* Implications of a Miracle Pregnancy

If Obi-Wan gets pregnant, Anakin’s going to be the one getting invested in the future nibling

Grieving with Newborns (Padme still dies, and Anakin goes to Obi-Wan for help) - Addendum - Addendum 2

Ventress gets pregnant as a get-out-of-jail card

Anakin and Obi-Wan babytalk the twins differently

Post-O66

* Eldritch Ahsoka (1k plus notes)

- Speaker of Mortis

The Mortis Song

Emperor Bail - Addendum

Pirate Mace (Mace survives O66, joins Hondo) - Tax Evasion

Yularen’s Radio Show

Yularen undercover on the Death Star (feeding info to the Rebellion)

* When Vader Fails (in the Wrong Direction) (quick note)

* Owen Needs a Favor

Korkie gets dragged along on Bo-Katan’s insurgency plots

What’s Korkie Up To?

Barriss breaks out of prison and incidentally joins up with Rex

Barriss breaks out of prison and finds Ahsoka because she needs an external moral compass

Quinlan finds, frees, and press-gangs Bly into helping him fuck up the Empire, in Aayla’s memory/honor

Ventress Bothers Darth Vader

Bo-Katan bothers Ben Kenobi

Vader hallucinates so intensely that he destroys the Empire because he talked to a ghost who was disappointed in him.

Vader gets turned into an anime waifu and everyone hates that

A trad Mando of Din’s type finds Merrin, and decides to return her to her people. The only one still alive that they know of is Ventress.

Padme’s Handmaidens: Let’s Scam The Empire Into Thinking Amidala Is Still Alive

Original Trilogy and Beyond

Han’s Anti-Force Force-Sensitivity

Bumbling Vampire Han Solo

The ghosts of all those murdered Jedi Kids are haunting Vader but he’s just… too pathetic for them to try that hard

Mace’s ghost mentors Luke - Jocasta’s ghost mentors Leia

ANH Obi-Wan pretends to be senile, lost, and politely befuddled on the Death Star when noticed by Stormtroopers

Rex and Wolffe, dying Cody

Boba Accidentally Acquires The Darksaber, And Now He Can’t Get Rid Of It

Vader skypes his kids from jail

Mpreg Vader - This AU is in the Wider AUs Masterlist

Trans Vaderkin pregnancy, prenatal addiction to the Dark Side - Followup

Darth Vader gets turned into a cute teen girl and makes it everyone’s problem

Luke finds Decrepit Old Hermit Dooku hiding out on some mountain and recruits him to the new Jedi School before anyone can tell him why that’s a bad idea

The Mandalorian:

Ahsoka’s got Beef (The Mandalorian)

Boba’s Older Brothers

No, REALLY Old

Whacking sticks

Maul’s Back - Now with art by @its-not-a-pen

What I would want out of The Mandalorian            

Bo-Katan knows Luke is Vader’s kid, keeps her mouth shut

Bo-Katan fucking with Obi-Wan’s Ghost

Get some actual Mando’a in here, Disney, you cowards

BobaDin but Fennec’s making fun of Boba the whole time

Satine is one of the darksaber ghosts - Addendum

Tradition as Din’s Covert vs. Tradition as Death Watch

Middle-Aged Foppish Duke in Distress Korkie is very enamored by Mand’alor Din regularly rescuing him

[bedlamsbard]

not to talk about Star Wars on main and I'd fight Dave Filoni in a Waffle House parking lot as much as the next burned out former Star Wars fan, but also it is so funny to me when people blame Dave for stuff in TCW that comes directly from George Lucas. Ahsoka being Anakin's padawan was George Lucas's decision, not Dave Filoni's.

from The Art of Star Wars: The Clone Wars, which I realize has been out of print for a good long while now.

text: A teenage Togruta Padawan, Ahsoka Tano was a completely new character. "Ahsoka came out of an earlier idea for the series when I didn't think we were going to have Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi in it," says Filoni. "Henry [Gilroy] and I came up with a concept about two Jedi, a Master and a Padawan, assigned to the black market."

Though they jettisoned the concept once Lucas made it clear that the series would feature Skywalker and Kenobi, Gilroy and Filoni stuck with the idea of a girl Padawan. "Dave and I figured that Anakin was a Jedi Knight very early in the war, so we thought it would be interesting if we gave Obi-Wan a replacement Padawan," recalls Gilroy. "But George wanted her to be Anakin's Padawan."

"We added the idea of a Padawan so that we wouldn't be stuck in the same relationship dynamic between Anakin and Obi-Wan," says Lucas. "This is a way of explaining Anakin's rise to being a full-fledged Jedi, and at the same time the growing relationship between Anakin and Obi-Wan as friends, as equals. In order to do that, we needed someone to take on the role of the younger person who is being taught in these stories."

"We were as surprised as anyone that Anakin had a Padawan," laughs Filoni, who got the task of figuring out how to work a major new character into the Star Wars saga. Filoni and Gilroy developed her character as a mix between Anakin's brashness and Obi-Wan's measured judgment, reflecting the shift between the Republic and the oncoming Empire.

"Anakin is in favor of a stricter type of government. Obi-Wan represents the Old Republic," explains Filoni. "Ahsoka's in between them, looking back at what was, looking forward to what might be."

[the-far-bright-center]

Re: Obitine and Anidala

I originally wrote this in response to @marvelstars' excellent post on the subject, but I wanted to share it again because it's one of many topics in which I have a differing view from the prevailing fandom perspective.

Above all, it truly drives me nuts how the fandom pits these two relationships against each other. I'm a die-hard Anidala shipper and when I first watched TCW, I was DELIGHTED by the Obitine ship. I saw nothing about it that made me think it was supposed to be viewed as somehow 'better' or more 'ideal' than Anidala. I only ever saw it as a relationship that was more suited to Obi-Wan's character and personality. Not to mention that Padme and Satine are presented as friends who get along well and go on adventures together to right political wrongs, much in the same vein that Anakin and Obi-Wan go on their many military exploits together. The story sets them up as two couples who, in an a more ideal timeline, would be besties who go on double dates together. In my opinion, fandom's insistence on viewing them through the lens of 'which one is a 'morally better couple' is completely missing the point. Personally, I see them as two sides of the same coin.

Since @marvelstars' post was specifically about these two couples as they relate to the idea of commitment to the Jedi Order, I also focused on that angle. Imo, the way Obitine's relationship panned out made sense for their characters and context. Just like Anidala's makes sense for theirs. Obi-Wan and Satine met each other as young adults and had a whole year 'on the run' together before having to say their farewells, whereas Anakin and Padme first meet as children, then re-meet and fall in love over a short span of time, and then suddenly their world is at war and they are facing imminent, possibly indefinite, separation. That's why they marry while still remaining in their respective Jedi and Senator roles, because they feel it might be their only chance to have anything resembling the family they both long for. They understand that they might not survive the war. Whereas Obi-Wan and Satine had first met when Satine's world was already enmeshed in civil war, and then they parted once peace was reestablished and their lives were no longer in immediate danger. And when they meet again during the Clone Wars, it's a wholly different scenario and things have drastically changed (she is the head of a neutral system, he is already established as a general in a war she is opposed to). They are also older, in their 30s, while Anakin and Padme embody the headstrong impetuosity and passion of young love. So it's not as though Obi-Wan and Satine are going to drop everything and enter a committed relationship/marriage in that context in the same way Anakin and Padme do in theirs (when, notably, Anakin is still a padawan and about to be sent to the frontlines to fight in a war for the first time).

As mentioned above, when I was watching TCW I never thought that the purpose of showing both of these relationships in contrasting-parallel to one another was somehow to demonstrate that one was more 'sacrificial' for remaining in the Order and giving up the relationship while the other was more 'selfish' for trying to have both at the same time. Rather, what I feel the story is actually saying is something completely different. It's important to remember that both of these relationships involve a Jedi and the political leader to whom he had originally been assigned as a bodyguard. What is the significance of that? Well, I would argue it's more than just a romantic trope. When I watch Lucas-era Star Wars, I'm always aware that the characters have both an immediate role in-story as well as a symbolic function. Satine, a pacifist, can be seen to represent Peace. Padme, as a Senator, stands for Justice and the rights of the people. And what is it that Obi-Wan says to Luke all those years later? That the Jedi were 'the guardians of Peace and Justice in the old Republic'. This strikes me as hugely significant. Especially if we understand that the Jedi Order had lost its way as of the Prequels-era. While the fandom focuses on which couple is 'better' because of how their relationship affects each Jedi's respective commitment to the Order, I see it from a completely different angle. My understanding is that the Jedi's TRUE purpose (in relation to their role within the Republic) was actually to dedicate their lives to protecting Peace and Justice and those who truly upheld these ideals in the galaxy. Obi-Wan and Anakin's actual callings in life should have been to protect Satine and Padme, whom they loved. Whether this manifested in a more chivalric, courtly love scenario or an outright marriage is immaterial. Rather, what matters is that being a Jedi and dedicating their lives to these women due to their love for them was not incompatible with their role as protectors and defenders of the galaxy, but was in fact the truest expression of it. The so-called 'commitment' to the Order itself was never truly the point, and that's the tragedy of the Prequels-era. Because it was the Order that had by this point forbidden love and family, and which had embroiled Obi-Wan and Anakin and the rest of the Jedi in a war that went against their own principles. A war that, it could be argued, ultimately lead to the deaths of both Satine and Padme, and with them Peace and Justice—the very values that the Jedi were supposed to protect and serve.

[galactic-rhea]

Tbh clone wars has some really "wow they went THERE" moments when it comes to sex stuff.

There are several moments where the show just shows literal sexual harassment or asult and just... brushes it off, Padme, Ahsoka, even Anakin are victim to this (unwanted kisses being the most common, but If I remember correctly some death watch guy smacks Ahsoka on the butt once)

Also Ahsoka gets almost sex trafficked(???) A few times. Like what was the implication soposed to be with the Zygerrian arc, or when Hondo tries to sell her?

At least with Hondo we can assume he mightve just been trying to sell her to the separatists but also... dude wtf?

There's also several instances where the clone wars show tweets woman in a... yikes way, some just seems fairly realistic for a war (the Ryloth dancers, the clones having pin up posters, a few comments here and there)

Idk where I'm going with this but long story short: I agree with you on that clone wars arc, Anakin felt so out of charecter and I almost always hate jealous boyfriend arcs becuase they're so often ooc and kinda sexist???

Oh, agreed, they really did. I think partially a lot of that has to do with the fact it was done in an era where...that sort of stuff was way more common in shows, lol

With the Death Watch thing, it was Bo-Katan who smacked Ahsoka's butt. And after she said she was engaged to Lux, not less. It's funny if you try to not think too hard about it 😭 I guess is more acceptable if isn't a guy the one doign it,,,,in Cartoon Network standards, i suppose.

Also yeah, I have a strong distaste with Ahsoka's treatement during the Zigerrian arc, like truly awful, and truly a bad look on Anakin, Obi-Wan, and anyone who agreed with it (and it doesn't help that Anakin's actitude was so...cocky, sure, dude, whatever). The Zigarrian arc is such a weird case because in one hand I'm all for inflicting more trauma and whump onto Anakin,,,,on the other, his actitude and total disregard of Ahsoka's safety is extremely frustrating (you could argue neither Obi-Wan nor Anakin really expected the plan to go wrong in any way, still very bad, not good guys). Then again, if I recall, the plan wasn't quite their idea at all, and in the comics Anakin is way less confident about it, and Ahsoka was the one insisting in going, but yeah, yeah, just another case of weird writting wiwth mixed results.

But yeah, it was the episode with Hondo capturing her that reeaaaally made me go "was that necessary", it can be very messed up, and is true that it's barely aknowledged. I suppose the difference with the Clovis arc, is that in that episode they do make more clear that it's wrong, they just don't allow Padmé to have any agency about it, it was just used to make Anakin jealous.

Overall: I think I have said it before, but TCW main problem is that it tackles stuff on a very surface level due being short-episodes, with one-time plots, and being a kids show. So the characters aren't allowed to react too much about their messed up circumstances. Almost everything is always reseted after an arc ends. Anakin isn't allowed have moments of reflection or to show how things can be affecting him on a deeper level. And the same can be argued with other characters.

Sadly all those instances with Ahsoka are treated like jokes. And all the very unsubtle implications of Anakin being assaulted in the Zigerrian arc isn't dealt with beyond having Anakin consider whatever slavist nonsense the queen tells him. While other things, just like you said with the dancers, does make the world seem a bit bigger and more deep, as messed up as it can be.

[david-talks-sw]

The fact that Dave Filoni called Anakin “the greatest Jedi ever” is proof that he’s bias AF. His anti-Jedi rhetoric is bupkis.

I wonder if he means "the greatest" in terms of in-universe fame...?

Dunno if this is the case in Canon (then again Dave Filoni blatantly ignores any *non-motion* transmedia elements in Canon so meh), but in Legends he's:

"Anakin Skywalker, the Hero with no Fear™, handsome, dashing, the face of the Republic's army during the Clone War, the only Jedi who tried to resist the nefarious Order's coup and was treacherously murdered for it".

And I seem to remember that, in Canon, he's like the Jedi Temple's superstar anyway, every Jedi recognizes him on sight. I mean, that line from Baylon about "Anakin speaking highly of Ahsoka" must have some meaning beyond artificial personal stakes.

So from a fame and a "power level" standpoint... sure.

He's the greatest.

I'm giving Filoni the benefit of the doubt.

While I've talked about why Filoni's entire headcanon about the Jedi doesn't track with what George Lucas' intended narrative, I think it's worth acknowledging that Filoni's bias comes from part of his duties while directing The Clone Wars was.

One of the goals of TCW was humanizing Anakin, expanding upon his character make him go from "a character whose only purposes is to embody the themes presented in three movies based on the matinee serial format" to a relatable person, a good man, the hero Ben mentions to Luke in A New Hope.

I think it's normal that he'll see Anakin in a more positive light.

Also (and full disclosure this is just me theorizing I am no authority on any of this so if turns out I'm wrong just come right out and say so)...

I'm pretty sure that Filoni, Lesley Headland and most of the recent Star Wars authors are all Gen X, raised by baby boomers forced to conform to society, obey authority and have proper decorum (boys don't cry!) all of which they strove to rebel against. Add to that the corruption they witnessed growing up and coming out of high school, and you see a kind of jadedness emerge. "The rules aren't as black and white, the world is grey."

So while most of them and the boomers despised the Prequels upon release, a few of them projected a more individualistic headcanon onto those movies that fit with where their head was, at the time.

As such: Anakin isn't interpreted by them as a cautionary tale about what happens when you're greedy. He's a misunderstood rebel, a non-conformist who has his flaws but is ultimately good at heart. Which isn't entirely inaccurate, but it is very clearly an embellishment of a character who will one day become a space nazi.

The fact is... the Prequels were made by a boomer. One with very liberal values and who was himself a rebel, but a boomer all the same. The whole point of his story is...

"we all must come together and fight as one, if push comes to shove; we must all be compassionate and selfless if we are to survive; don't be greedy, let people go when it's their time to leave".

And then he makes the Jedi say that, making them beacons of truth and good and compassion in his fairy tale, now aimed at Gen Z kids.

Gen X-ers hear/read that and project all the boomer BS they had been told onto the Jedi...

"oh, so the Jedi are saying you shouldn't love yourself, you shouldn't be yourself, you should give up on what makes you an individual to fit in, you shouldn't feel any emotions"

Because nobody is that good, realistically, right?

This happened in other mediums. The one that comes to mind on the spot is the relationship between Mufasa and Scar.

In The Lion King, Mufasa is strong and noble, Scar is weak and conniving. Simple enough. Around that same time, in A Tale of Two Brothers, young Mufasa is shown to be pretty nice with Taka (Scar), who is framed as a spoiled brat to begin with.

Skip to the 2019 remake, and it's hinted Mufasa gave Scar his wound, and in The Lion Guard they explain that Scar got his nickname from Mufasa mocking him for a misadventure.

He went from being a noble king to a bully who had it coming, Scar is an underdog who got picked on. Because again: nobody is that pure, right? Fairytales be-damned.

Nothing is black and white, it's all grey.

So yeah, long story short I do think that Filoni being part of the generation that wasn't the target demographic but was old enough to retcon the crap out of the Prequels also plays a role into his view of Anakin.

[bg-11]

Ripping into TCW's A Friend in Need, in which every character is awful.

I'm going to be upfront about this: I do not care for TCW, I never really have. See, I've always been a big stickler for continuity, even as a kid, and by this point there was *plenty* of Clone Wars related content that had been set across the whole 3 years of the war. The big issue of course was always Ahsoka, who of course just couldn't neatly slot into that timeframe at all because there were already plenty of comics that made it clear that Anakin never had a Padawan. She was a square peg the writers of TCW had jammed into a square hole. Of course, Ahsoka wasn't the only example, it was clear the writers never really gave a shit about what other, better writers had already established, and so retcons and continuity errors were rife with the series, only increasing as it continued. Exactly the kind of thing I was leery about. I was willing to give it a chance when it first came out, but that optimistic goodwill didn't really last too long.

I watched it on-and-off when it came out to check it out, I didn't want to judge it without having seen it. It was the same when I heard about how obnoxious Karen Traviss' Republic Commando series was, I wanted to see if that was as bad as people were saying it was (it was worse). By Season 4, I was pretty ready to write it off, the retcons were getting bigger and bigger (Even Piell getting killed off before his Canon death in Coruscant Nights, changing Asajj Ventress' backstory and fate contrary to what it was in the Republic comics, treating the Nightsisters as if they were literal witches who could use actual magic, the list goes on, but those were my biggest gripes). One episode that stood out to me though, was A Friend in Need, an episode in which pretty much everyone except for Artoo is stupid, malicious or both. At the time, I thought it was the worst episode of TCW yet. Has that changed since then? Yeah, but I'd still count this episode as the dumbest.

For whatever reason, the episode popped into my head recently after...I don't know how long its been, relatively shortly after the episode aired, I guess? And, I don't know, I guess I wanted to take a jab at picking it apart? I've never really done this before, there've been a couple of times when I've wanted to examine bad media, but for whatever reason, I never really got to it. So, fuck it, better late than never, I guess. So, I rewatched the episode to get it fresh in my mind. As the old EU was still Canon when this aired, I'm putting it through the lens of it still being Canon when I talk about it.

There's a good reason why my friends call me a masochist, I guess.

Things start out on Mandalore, where Ahsoka is escorting Padme, Bail and Mon Mothma in talks with representatives from the Separatist Senate when Lux Bonteri walks in. When I first watched A Friend in Need, I had missed Lux's Introductory episode which also introduced the Separatist Senate, so I was a little confused here. Confused because prior to TCW, there wasn't a Separatist Senate, the Confederacy was solely ruled over by the Separatist Council. Now, there's commentary from Filoni that apparently, the EU writers had misunderstood the purpose of the Separatist Council, that no, they weren't the leaders of the CIS, and that the megacorporation's who made up the CIS were just neutral parties. I have two issues with that, first being that I trust Dave "I sincerely believe this man wants to fuck wolves" Filoni's word about as far as I can throw his furry ass, and two, that isn't how it comes across in the movies at all.

The leaders of the Trade Federation, Intergalactic Banking Clan, Techno Union and Commerce Guild are all present, outright saying they're pledging their alliance and their armies to the Separatist cause. That they're apparently neutral, uninvolved parties doesn't gel at all, it just seems like a clumsy retcon to me. One of many.

But anyway...

Lux busts in and causes a scene, accusing Count Dooku of murdering his mother, so the Separatist senators have their guards drag him away. Ahsoka, concerned, gets permission from Padme to follow him, as long as she's discrete. Lux is dragged back to the Separatist's shuttle, where a hologram of Dooku appears to gloat a bit, before telling the droids to execute Lux. Why he doesn't just use the Force to choke him, I don't know, all you need is line of sight.

Now, I'd actually misremembered how this scene went down. In my memory, Lux dropped an ion grenade to disable the droids and *then* Ahsoka showed up. Apparently my flawed memory made Lux more competent then he actually is in the episode. How was he actually planning on getting away? We'll get back to that in a moment, but for right now, he's at the battle droid's mercy.

And then Ahsoka intervenes.

Here's another issue I had with Ahsoka, her characterisation. There were a couple of moments that stuck with me that I think are relevant here.

Season 1, episode 19, Storm Over Ryloth: Ahsoka has to learn not to be a reckless, headstrong idiot because she gets her troops killed.

Season 2, episode 1, Holocron Heist: Ahsoka has to learn not to be a reckless, headstrong idiot because she gets her troops killed.

This episode? Ahsoka is a reckless, headstrong idiot who forces her way into a hostile situation, gets the attraction of a bunch of armed droids and leads them back towards the Senate Guards who are stationed at the Republic shuttle, quickly alerts the unaware men that some pissed off droids are on her tail, then boards the shuttle, takes off and flees back to Coruscant, abandoning the Senators she was supposed to be escorting *and* the Senate Guards who are now taking the heat for her.

Ahsoka is such a shitty bodyguard, Jesus Christ. Getting Lux to safety is a priority, fine, but why does she need to board the ship herself and flee the system entirely? Why not just have Lux board the ship, then go back to help the Senate Guards deal with the battle droids that she *led* there in the first place? They're not just regular battle droids either, they're droid commandos who are supposed to be a lot tougher and smarter than the standard B1 battle droids. We don't see the outcome of this fight, so I presume the Senate Guards won, which, good thing. Because Ahsoka abandoned the Senators she was supposed to be watching over, and I genuinely wouldn't put it past the Separatists to pull something now that these peace talks have collapsed because of what Ahsoka did. They were never going to work out anyway of course, given Sidious' whole purpose behind the Clone Wars, but the characters aren't aware of that.

Anakin gets in contact and when Lux tries to apologise with "Master Jedi, I'm sorry if I've caused you any trouble." ("If" you caused trouble? "If"?)

Ahsoka tries to brush it off with "It's nothing." Uh, no, it's not. See the above paragraphs for why it *is* a big deal, and I can't see Anakin of all people being too happy with Padme being left in a dangerous situation like that. But I guess we're brushing past that, cool.

Ahsoka points out how dumb Lux's plan was, saying he would have been killed if she hadn't intervened (true). Then Lux says no, actually, he *did* have a plan, then he pulls out a taser and stuns Ahsoka. Seriously? His plan was to go in, confront Dooku, hoping that he'd send a transmission just to gloat (apparently he "knew" he would, but why? He could just have easily been shot by the battle droids), and he went in there armed with a dinky little taser? Brilliant plan, I'm sure that would have done *wonders* against a squad of droid commandos all armed with blasters.

Ahsoka wakes up hours later aboard the shuttle with just Artoo, her lightsabers missing. She goes out to talk to Lux and finds out the contacts he's meeting are the Death Watch, that Mandalorian supremacist group of terrorists who are awful even by Mandalorian standards.

Jesus Christ, Lux is so fucking stupid.

Despite Ahsoka attempting to tell him that they're bad news, he keeps brushing it off because they *also* hate Dooku, so it'll be fine. Back aboard the ship, Artoo finds Ahsoka's lightsabers tucked away in a random drawer. So, if she had bothered to look for them, she would have found them in the space of five minutes. My God, she is useless. These two deserve each other, I swear.

Oh, and we meet Bo-Katan for the first time.

Awful, *evil* Bo-Katan.

On the ride back, Lux reveals he had a way to track Dooku's location through his communication.

Serenno. He was probably on Serenno, his homeworld of Serenno, where he has a mansion on Serenno, Serenno on which he is a Count. This isn't exactly hidden knowledge.

They go back to the Death Watch compound. see them using kitbashed battle droids as target practice and Ahsoka is marched off while Lux talks to their leader, Pre Vizsla. Apparently, he has beef with Dooku now and the Count gave him a scar. Which, first thing, if Dooku had wanted him dead, he'd be dead. Second, I actually don't remember those two falling out, so I looked it up and apparently it happens entirely offscreen between his last appearance and now, so whatever, I guess. Also, Vizsla threatens to cut up Lux if he doesn't hand over the tracer, and Lux seems pretty fine with that. Brilliant, that one, real smart.

Ahsoka gets thrown in with a hut full of enslaved women from a nearby village. Great people, those Mandalorians. Artoo, meanwhile, is taken to the droid shack and told to fix up the damaged battle droids so they can be used as target practice again. They don't even slap a restraining bolt on him, they just leave him to his own devices. Which, in this case, happens to be a room full of battle droids, several of which actually still have blasters in repairable condition as we'll see later.

Well, the Mandalorians are rock stupid, so I suppose I can't complain *that's* out of character.

Big feast is held, now Lux can see with his own eyes that the Death Watch are using the local women as slaves...but he doesn't seem to give much of a shit about it, even as Ahsoka keeps trying to point out how awful his allies are. It's at that point the village elder shows up and demands Viszla let his people go. He did this unarmed, with his only support being two other unarmed villagers, walking into a camp full of hostile people who had already taken the village's women as slaves and expected things to go well for him. When Vizsla agrees in the most sinister way possible, with several other Death Watch members openly snickering about it, the elder thinks all is well and Lux even says: "You see? They're not the butchers you make them out to be."

I...Jesus Christ, they were using the local women as slaves, but you're fine with that so long as they take them back when they're done? Lux has to be the stupidest character in this series, I swear. There is exactly one smart person this entire episode and it's Artoo.

Next day, the Death Watch take the enslaved women back to their village, the Elder thanking him for it.

And then he takes out his stupid edgesaber and stabs the man's granddaughter in front of him. Can't help but feel this would have been more impactful if obvious sacrificial lamb character had more than a minute of screentime, but okay, its awful and its typical Mando behaviour. For good measure they start torching the village and maybe set one villager on fire. And much to my shock, Lux finally gets it. I was half expecting him to brush it off as them setting fires to keep the villagers warm. Ahsoka seems to impale a guy with a blunt pole, before getting tied up. And then they drag her back to their camp from their speeder...yeah, Ahsoka should be dead.

Then Lux says this...

"I believed you had honour, but you're just murderers."

What possibly led you to think that conclusion, you absolute dumbass? This whole time, Vizsla has been acting as blatantly sinister and creepy as Dick Dastardly, if he had a moustache he'd be twirling it. Lux seems like the kind of character who needs to be told not to drink drain-cleaner, I swear to God.

As Vizsla is preparing to deal with Idiot and Useless, Artoo shows up with an army of kitbashed droids...and like I said either, a few of them have working blasters. Literally the only competent character, I swear. Artoo gives Ahsoka her lightsabers back, and Vizsla decides to duel her one-on-one, because like every Mando, he has a totally unearned superiority complex. She ends up slicing his jetpack and he doesn't even notice until Ahsoka points it out to him. How did he not hear her hit it? How did he not feel that? In the confusion of the exploding jetpack, Dumb and Dumber manage to escape, chased by Bo-Katan, but they get away.

Then Lux fucks off in the escape pod, the end.

And apparently the next time Ahsoka runs into Bo-Katan, they're besties and join forces to free Mandalore. Guess Ahsoka kinda forgot about the whole slavery, village torching and innocent people she murdered, huh? Yeah, guess so. Bo-Katan fucking sucks, she doesn't get a redemption, the narrative just wants you to forget all the atrocities she commits because she doesn't want Maul to be her leader. Zuko she ain't.

Ahsoka majorly screws up her assignment, puts senators in danger and gets some guards killed, Lux is so braindead that he blindly trusts the most obviously evil pack of killers he could find. I'd say he needs a helmet, but I don't think its possible for him to get anymore brain damage.

TCW is massively overrated, this is a hill I will die on.

[callipraxia]

Lying here at 7am, sneezing my head off because of ragweed, and I had a thought about the novelization of Revenge of the Sith.

Early in said novelization, there’s a retrospective on a couple of important moments in Anakin and Padme’s early marriage, specifically around how, since Anakin, as a Jedi trainee, doesn’t own things or have much ability to acquire them, which is an Issue when it comes to giving his new wife a wedding present…so he ‘gives’ her C-3PO, to be ‘a friend’ while he is, as he frequently is, absent, and there’s a sweet moment where Padme politely invites Threepio to join her staff, because on Naboo, droids as high-functioning as Threepio are considered beings, not property. Anakin also notes that technically, since his builder (Anakin himself) owns nothing, Threepio kind of owned himself even before this. Then later, she gives him R2-D2 as ‘a friend’ in return, at which point Anakin starts modifying him this way and that until Artoo eventually obtains at least as much cognitive function as Threepio, setting the stage for the bond the droids have throughout the series. All very nice…but then jump to the very end of the book, immediately after Padme dies and Bail Organa adopts Leia. Y’know. The moment when he casually orders that Threepio undergo a mind wipe to forget…pretty much everything. Who “the Maker” was, all about his years of service to Senator Amidala, where the Princess came from and the fact she has a brother, etc. Then cut forward about twenty years to the beginning of A New Hope, where Threepio fussily keeps scolding Artoo about how “Master Luke” is his owner now and he should therefore forget the mission from their previous owner. It never seems to occur to Threepio, after his years on Alderaan, that they could think for and own themselves, even though again, in the novelizations, Threepio has technically done so for longer than Artoo has; the only difference is that Artoo still remembers everything, whereas Threepio only remembers, at most, the past twenty years.

Clearly, droids did not enjoy the same legal privileges on Alderaan that they did on Novelization!Naboo…but why is that relevant? Threepio, recall, was said to have legal rights on Naboo as a member of Padme’s staff. At a stretch, since Anakin couldn’t technically own Artoo either, one could make an argument that Artoo was still legally Padme’s property and therefore automatically passed into the ownership of her daughter when Padme died*, since Anakin and Padme and Threepio seem to have been the only ones who realized at that time how sentient the astromech had become, but there was really no doubt about Threepio: if Stover’s writing in the official novelization is taken as on any level canonical, then Threepio, as a high-functioning droid, was an employee; certainly this is the case within the pages of the book in question, where he meets the same ends. Padme no more owned him than she owned Jar-Jar or the Handmaidens who acted as her body doubles or her other Senate aides...at least on Naboo and areas where its laws applied, like the embassy on Coruscant, I suppose. They were not in Naboo space at the time of Padme’s death, and apparently the idea that droids could be autonomous was culturally alien to Alderaanians…but we see in TCW that Bail had worked pretty closely with Padme for years. They were political allies, but also friends. They’d risked their lives together before - in the Committee of 2,000 conspiracy, in that episode of The Clone Wars where they investigated a murder together, and arguably, Padme had put her life in his hands without a second thought again on Empire Day when she made that “how liberty dies” remark in the midst of the rest of the Senate’s enthusiastic endorsement of Palpatine’s announcement. Padme also was shown to have a real Problem with the discovery that slavery still existed in the galaxy when she met Shmi and Anakin as a girl, and considering she later married an ex-slave who had…rather strong feelings about the subject, it’s hard to imagine that she didn’t get personally emotionally invested in the issue as well. Anti-slavery measures would have probably been part of her political platform, especially in that gap between Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones where there wasn’t a war that depended on slave soldiers to consider. It never, in all that time, came up with Bail? He never said, “It’s strange how you treat that protocol droid of yours - you act as though he were a person,” to which Padme could only reply that “by my planet’s laws, he is”? Padme never voiced any discomfort with the Alderaanian stance on high-functioning droids in all their years of working together? Why would her good friend not think twice about treating one of her staffers as his property before the poor woman’s corpse was even cold? Even if he disagreed, he ought to have at least had the thought “oh wow, I am disrespecting my friend’s memory here,” or even a hesitation about his legal right to give orders about Threepio’s memory, given that there would of necessity have to have been some interstellar agreement on whether Planet A’s laws about droids applied to droids from Planet A when they were on Planet B, especially if Planet B was neutral space like Coruscant, the place where Bail would have been most familiar with Threepio. I’m American and reasonably historically literate; American history was never my favorite branch of history, but I know all about the sort of trouble it causes when people don’t agree about whether laws from one state in a republic apply in another. See also: the American Civil War? And more recently, the issue of gay marriage, back when states determined that individually. Didn’t cause a war that time, but anyone who had the political awareness of a tree branch probably knew of the issue and, however dimly, probably something of why it was such an issue.

It’s now 9am, and yeah, yeah, I know, all this was necessary to protect the Chosen Twins because Threepio is a bit of an idiot, or it would have taken too much time/been too much at the tail end of a plot as dark as that of RotS to have a quick scene where Threepio agreed to become Bail’s property in order to stay with Leia, etc etc. But considering that Bail’s one of the good guys, it’s pretty messed up to realize how casually someone’s rights could just get hand waved away the moment they no longer had anyone politically powerful immediately on hand to defend them. It’s hard not to think…with his memory gone, Threepio doesn’t even know that he was supposed to have rights, and most humans cannot communicate fluently with Artoo. Bit disturbing to put oneself in that position, to wonder, as messy as the world’s getting…who’s the one person standing between us and having our rights almost as casually overwritten? Not quite as casually, I suppose, since mind wipes don’t exist for us (…yet…probably), but almost. Not something Lucas probably meant to put there, given that he didn’t write the official novelization and his apparent failure to think out the droid issue especially well**, but there’s where my brain’s going on this sneezy, sneezy morning.

* Note: this is totally ignoring the issue of whether this is moral and ethical or not. Also ignoring the issue of how that even stacks with the assiduous efforts to conceal that Padme’s child/children hadn’t died with her, in which case, being legally dead/never personified, it’s hard to consider them her legal heirs anyway.

** See also this video essay: https://youtu.be/WD2UrB7zepo?si=HcttHLpZFGnU5bNb

[tangents-within-tangents]

I can't believe people still say The Clone Wars and The Bad Batch are "just kids shows" when whatever this show is literally exists:

analysis of target audiences below (there's a TL;DR don't worry)

Okay so the whole "it's just for kids" fallacy/excuse/conversation stopper is such an issue as it is. Here's a good video about it, I'll probably do a whole rant at some point, but in short: the level of storytelling merit, emotional depth, and thematic exploration a work can and should achieve has never been limited by it's target audience/age group, nor it's storytelling medium. (And if you don't think that's true, try to tell me Pixar has never made you cry, go on)

So it doesn't matter if it was made for kids or not. There's nothing wrong with that and anyone can enjoy it anyway. But what I actually wanna talk about here is not the merits of "kids shows" but the misconception on what "kid show" even means.

For one thing, I think when some people say "it's a kids show" they are lumping anything from like Winnie the Pooh to Avatar: the Last Airbender into the same category, and that's just not how it works. The above example demonstrates that not all kids shows/stories are the same anyway (partially bc level of development/education changes drastically between the ages of like 3 and 12, and these are things that are really taken into account in the publishing industry).

I found Disney's ratings guide and I think this should clear some things up:

For reference:

Young Jedi Adventures is listed as TV-Y

Clone Wars (2003), Rebels, and Resistance are TV-Y7-FV

Clone Wars, Bad Batch, and the Tales of the Jedi/Empire are TV-PG

Mandalorian, Ahsoka, Kenobi, Book of Boba Fett, Andor, and Acolyte are all TV-14

And if we put that in context with the films:

The Clone Wars (2008) film and the Original and Prequel trilogy are PG except for Revenge of the Sith which is PG-13 along with the Sequel trilogy, Rogue One and Solo.

So basically TCW and TBB are considered by Disney's own system to be about the same level as most of the films. They are 4 degrees away from 'Young Jedi Adventures' and only 1 degree lower than the live-action shows. Which frankly feels like we got some animation bias going on since all the live-action shows are automatically in one category (which is silly as is and undue here anyway (here have another video) esp since the Clone Wars animation style is clearly meant to be older/more realistic). But regardless, it's literally right there:

And again there is nothing wrong with TCW/TBB being kids shows, but some internet-ers dismiss it as "made for 7 year olds" and that's just objectively not true. Strictly from this system (which idk how it compares to whatever system Cartoon Network used when it aired) you could say the TV-PG might mean 8-13 years old (which is a wide range tbh, there's a big difference between being 8 and being 13), but since TV-G says "suitable for ALL ages" it's also not limited to that.

Also if TCW was aimed for ~8-13 year old's back in 2008 then those same people, who TBB was clearly meant for based on the marketing, were ~21-26 when it premiered in 2021 (and I think that is definitely reflected in writing).

Age of the protagonist is another a good indicator, though it's not a strict rule (i.e. Ender's Game and To Kill a Mockingbird have younger pov characters but are clearly meant for older audiences) and we have a wide range in these shows (Ahsoka 14, Anakin 20, Obi-wan 35, Clones early 20s, Omega ??? 10ish?? idk it's unclear) and time passes. (And while a lot of TBB is filtered through Omega's perspective, there's also plenty of scenes/subplots/episodes where she isn't even there. Also I doubt anyone would call TLOU a kids show just bc Ellie is 14)

But also target audience is a lot more than just content ratings. Note how the first few ratings above say "this program is designed for" the age group, while after TV-G it's about if it contains anything that could be unsuitable for age groups. And ratings can be pretty vague and arbitrary, especially since they change over time (like I get RotS but I could not tell you what makes the Sequels PG-13 compared to the PG films. And why is 13 the age we draw the line at? And why is it 14 for TV instead?)

I think TCW confuses a lot of people because it jumps around a lot; some episodes are about Jar Jar or the droids, and then some are, you know, Umbara. But on a rewatch, even some of the more serious episodes like the Citadel or Kadavo arc still tend to have a more juvenile or simplistic tone/writing style, like repeating information a lot or joking in the middle of the mission (like right after Echo died, hello?!). This actually feels like a writing issue to me, like maybe the writers weren't very clear on what they were going for. (Reminds me also of the only episode I watched of the live-action Atla, where compared to the original it increased the violence/death, but also dumbed down the exposition and didn't seem to trust the audience) Though there is also a clear difference between the seasons, again because the audience and characters are growing up as time goes on. I don't think TBB really had that issue though. It never talked down and it was much more tonally consistent, even in the lower stakes episodes.

Personally TBB feels generally grittier than TCW, though it doesn't really have any of the dark/gruesome deaths and "this is a kids show?!?!" moments like TCW (i.e. clones getting airlocked, decapitated, cut in half by doors, squished by Grievous, and whatever the ever living eff Colt's death was). Though actually come to think of it, there are a few things (like Crosshair killing civilians, the electro suicide pills, and the clone on Tantiss who got skewered (rip)) but I don't think they stand out as much, maybe because they're given the proper weight so they fit the tone rather than feeling out of place. Well, most of the time at least...

Like the friendly fire incident is probably one of the heaviest moments in TCW but I don't see it in those compilations, maybe because the characters respond appropriately and it fits within the Umbara arc. Verses when stuff happens in the middle of lighter more childish plot lines that feel more shocking because they are somewhat brushed off.

But also here's the thing. I think people get really fixated on the darkness/violence/death thing, but it isn't actually as big a deal as we tend to think. Like you'll find "this is a kid's show?!?" compilations for so many shows like these (with a similar age range, like Gravity Falls) that are just anything remotely creepy or intense or related to death, as if kids can't handle anything at all. Like I'll admit it's surprising sometimes (Infinity Train traumatized me bro lol) but most of the time I think we're underestimating kids. Like do you remember being 12? It's not that young.

There just seems to be this misconceived barrier, like the argument goes: "Clone Wars is just a kid show" "No it's not, look at this death scene!" But like there's death scenes in Disney movies all the time, you know? I think that's also why we get so many of these MA animated shows (i.e. Invincible and Vox Machina) that feel the need to overdo the blood and gore to like prove themselves as adult shows (bc again, animation bias).

As a writer that's just not really where the distinction is. This came up in my 'Writing for Children and Adolescents' class and we were all a little surprised when our professor said that death/violence is actually fine for middle-grade (8-12, the 'golden age of reading' and probably the equivalent to TV-PG). Like think of stories with ~12 year old protagonists like Percy Jackson, Harry Potter, Gregor the Overlander (tho Suzanne could stand to tone that one down imo lol). Basically, violence is okay actually. And most the TCW and TBB characters are way older than middle-grade.

(Also I think the difference is usually more in the delivery. Like death and violence being more implied (no blood, or cutting away/seen with shadows), and themes/emotions generally being more clear, simple and stated upfront rather than more nuance, subtle and subtextual. (And tbh writing for kids is actually usually a lot harder btw))

The distinction we did learn about that has been most insightful for me has a lot more to with the story itself: what topics and themes does the story deal with? And what age group/phase of life does that speak to?

For example, Love You Forever is a picture book (generally considered 3-6 yr old range) but it deals with topics that are clearly aimed for an adult. It follows the parental character until they are on their death bed being taken care by their kid, that's not something a 6 year old would care about or relate to. That's why age of protagonist typically aligns too, bc they will be dealing with/worried about things that the reader is dealing with in their life too (like high school struggles vs career and family struggles etc).

Aaaand this post has (once again) gotten away from me lol so I don't feel the need to analyze all of the topics and themes in TCW and TBB, but basically look at what is being explored and how it is being talked about (since a lot of things, esp with war, aren't necessarily age exclusionary) and that can give you a good idea. I think it's clear TBB generally deals with things in a more nuanced and complex way than TCW (most of it at least, honestly the difference between seasons is stark). And there is a main emphasis on family and parenthood, especially with the very end speaking to both young adults growing up and moving out, and the parents letting them go.

TL;DR:

-Animation doesn't automatically equal for kids

-For kids doesn't equal lesser

-Not all kids media is the same bc not all age groups are the same

-Violence doesn't necessarily equal NOT for kids

-Age of protagonist and themes/topics are a better indicator

-The Clone Wars is def middle grade, and The Bad Batch is probably more YA to adult

-But nothing is exclusionary regardless

[jedi-enthusiast]

Ok, I know that I already reblogged @antianakin's post about why Anakin didn't need to murder an entire Tusken village because 2-3 of them killed his mom (original post here), but I just feel the need to talk about one of the most damning examples of why Anakin has no excuse for that response.

Post Order 66 Jedi/Clone interactions.

Let's just say, for the sake of the argument, that the entirety of the Tusken village--including the literal babies and children--all took part in the torture/murder of Shimi Skywalker. No exceptions.

Anakin's response to his mother's death is to murder everyone with no remorse or a second thought. Even when he confesses what he did to Padme, the RotS novel clearly shows that he doesn't actually feel bad about what he did. Most of his worry is about what others will think of him and, ironically, about how he's a "good Jedi" that should be better than this.

Now let's move on...

Every clone took part in Order 66 in some way.*

The clones murdered every single Jedi they could in cold blood (albeit without a choice), including the children, with only a miniscule few survivors. How many do we canonically have right now that didn't get captured and become Inquisitors? Obi-Wan, Quinlan, Cal, Caleb/Kanan, and Gungi are all I can think of at the moment.** That's 5 Jedi, out of thousands, that survived--and that's not even mentioning the destruction of their places of worship/cultural artifacts and the shitty propaganda spread about their culture.

* I'm not including the Bad Batch because, my own opinions about the show/characters/writing/etc. aside, we can all agree that the only reason their chips didn't activate was because they're Filoni's beloved OCs and he has a habit of trying to make his OCs "special" in some way.

** I'm not including Ahsoka in this because, like she says repeatedly as of Season 7 of TCW onward, she isn't a Jedi and doesn't see herself as such--and for the same reason I'm not including Grogu, since he's like...a Mandalorian apprentice now and not technically a Jedi. I'm also not including Luminara because she eventually gets captured and killed pretty early on and I'm trying to only include Jedi that are alive for a significant amount of time in the Imperial Era.

So, how do the Jedi treat the clones after they murder their entire family and destroy their culture? Let's look!

-----

Example One:

Obi-Wan Kenobi never learns about the inhibitor chips, as of current canon. He is 100% under the impression that Cody and the 212th (as well as all of the other clones) just up and betrayed him and the Order for no reason. He also watched the security tapes that, yes, showed Anakin killing children, but also would have shown the clones killing Jedi as well.

In the Kenobi show he runs into a clone veteran of the 501st--a veteran who, in all likelihood, probably stormed the Temple and was a part of its destruction.

Does he spit in the clone's face? Call him a murderer? Kill or harm him in any way?

Nope!

He gives the veteran some of his credits, even though it's made a point in the show that Obi-Wan is now working with limited funds and is very poor at this point in time. He doesn't have credits to spare and he is supposed to be looking for Leia, but he takes a moment to give some to someone who took part in the genocide of his people.

He also routinely thinks about Cody and the 212th in the comics! He remembers them fondly and still connects Cody to the feeling of hope, even though they tried to kill him! Even though he has no idea that they never wanted to!

-----

Example Two:

Kanan Jarrus/Caleb Dume knows about the inhibitor chips, but in Rebels it's made very clear that he thinks that it's just something the clones made up so that they didn't have to take responsibility for their actions.

In Rebels, Ahsoka makes the (objectively bad) decision to send Kanan out to find her "old friends" to help the rebellion.*** Kanan then finds out that her "old friends" are three clones, only after he gets there and sees them. He reacts in a panic and ignites his saber, clearly freaking out a bit.

*** I'll probably expand on this later, because I have a lot of opinions on this particular decision of hers, but anyway-

Does he try to hurt and/or kill them? Do they have to fight him off? Does he even lunge in their direction or deflect Wolffe's blaster bolt at him?

Again, nope!

He steps in front of Ezra in a defensive position and, when shot at by Wolffe, deflects the bolt into their ship. Then, when Ezra steps in and says that Ahsoka said to trust them, Kanan de-ignites his saber and they all have a conversation about them helping in the rebellion--even though Kanan clearly doesn't trust them at all and is dealing with his PTSD while being there. Eventually he even comes to get along with/trust Rex, albeit in later episodes.

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Example Three:

Gungi, in the Bad Batch, meets up with the Batch and immediately recognizes them as clones. Now, we don't know his opinion on them and their betrayal because it's never really expressed, but it's safe to assume that he has no idea about the chips (at least, until Tech tells him) and it's clear that he's very scared at that point in time.

What does he do?

He hides in the corner of the ship and is wary about the food they offer to him.

That's literally it.

And then later in the episode he works together with TBB and trusts them enough to let them help defend his village.

-----

So, even with most of the Jedi either having no idea about the chips or likely doubting that story, we're shown over and over again that the Jedi never seek revenge against the clones or try to kill them after Order 66. Even though their lives were ruined by what the clones did/took part in, they're never shown to be actively trying to cause them harm.

So there is literally no way you could possibly justify Anakin killing an entire village of Tuskens because of his mother's death, when--in arguably the same/a worse situation--the Jedi are actively shown not doing that.