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munson-blurbs · 2 years ago

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Single Dad!Eddie x Fem!ReaderSeries

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8

Summary: Thanksgiving brings back memories of happier times, and all you want is to recreate the past. But when those plans go awry, Eddie--and Harris, of course--are there to help you look forward to the future.

Warnings: mentions of Eddie's parents, brief familial conflict, Reader's grandma has dementia, most of this chapter is fluffy tbh

WC: 6.8k

Chapter 8/20

Scruffy!Eddie edit credit to @vexed-n-hexed Divider credit to @saradika

Thanksgiving, 1975

The sound of the kitchen timer beeping draws nine-year-old Eddie Munson’s attention from the television set. The local news network had been replaying the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade on a loop. It was now the third time that Eddie had watched Santa Claus make his way into Herald Square in a comically oversized sleigh, but he couldn’t get enough of it. The colorful balloons that hovered over the crowd, the marching bands playing in perfect unison, the feeling of excitement in the air—it was palpable all the way from his new home in Hawkins, Indiana.

“Dinner’s ready,” Wayne announces, grabbing the worn mitt off of the counter and pulling two TV dinners from the oven. “‘S not much, but at least we got turkey and mashed potatoes,” he bashfully adds.

Eddie nods, trying to walk without taking his eyes off of the screen.

Wayne’s bushy brows pinch together as he watches his nephew. “You always get this into the parade?” he asks.

“Never seen it before,” Eddie says softly. His parents had had a TV for a couple of years until they’d pawned it, but he doesn’t recall ever watching a parade. “Pretty cool.”

“We can keep it on while we eat, if ya want,” Wayne tells him, smiling when he sees the boy’s face light up. He places the plastic trays on the snack table and heads back to grab forks. “Ya got a favorite balloon? I’m partial to Snoopy, if y’ask me.”

Eddie nods, still transfixed on the TV. “Yeah, Snoopy’s good. I like him.” He takes the utensil from Wayne’s outstretched hand, absentmindedly dipping it in the congealed mashed potatoes. He pauses for a beat before bringing it to his lips. “Do I have to go back?”

“Hm?” Wayne mumbles, too focused on his own food to fully hear him.

“Do I have to go back with them when they get out?” Eddie repeats, keeping his voice low and training his gaze on the floor. “‘Cause I like it better here. With you. ‘S nice and quiet.”

There’s a lurch in Wayne’s chest at Eddie’s request. “Technically, I only have ya till your folks are sprung,” he admits, scratching a nail against the table, “but I can talk to a lawyer or somethin’ about keeping you here longer. Only if you want,” he adds.

“I wanna stay here,” Eddie confirms, spearing a pale turkey slice and popping it in his mouth without any attempt to cut it. “If it’s okay with you. I can sleep on the cot an�� you can take your bed back.”

Wayne shakes his head. “Room’s yours, Ed.” He takes a deep breath. “I don’t wanna promise you that the courts will agree to it, but I’m gonna try my damndest to keep you safe.” And it’s true. He’ll work double overtime at the plant if it’ll cover legal fees. When the social worker dropped Eddie off last week, Wayne had no idea how either of them would adjust. But aside from a few growing pains—like having to shave his nephew’s head when they’d discovered he’d had lice—things seemed to be alright.

“I, um, I wrote something at school yesterday,” Eddie pipes up, traipsing to his backpack and pulling out a sheet of paper. In his sloppy, boyish handwriting is written:

I am thankful for my Uncle Wayne because he takes care of me. He’s really nice and he works hard and he doesn’t mind that I listen to loud music. He also lets me feed my dinner scraps to the stray dogs in his trailer park. My Uncle Wayne is the best. I hope he’s thankful for me, too.

Wayne feels his throat constrict, and he clears it before Eddie can catch on. “‘Course I’m thankful for ya, Ed,” he manages. He reaches out to put his hand on his nephew’s back, flinching when the boy jerks away nervously. Eddie’s reflex to defend himself rather than embrace touch stirs up a reserved anger Wayne didn’t know he had, and he wills himself to simmer down before his nephew can sense it, lest he think he’s angry at him.

He slowly brings his hand to the couch cushion, careful not to make too much noise. We’ll get there, he thinks as the parade starts up for a fourth time. We’ll get there.

Thanksgiving, 1978

Ten years old is a strange age.

Too old to play with the little kids, but too young to hang around the teenagers or adults. You’re just kind of…there, like a piece of furniture that everyone absently walks around. This hiss of beer cans opening is barely audible over the men shouting at the football game on TV. You don’t know who’s playing, and you don’t really care, but it’s the only place you feel like you’ll be out of the way. Taking a seat on the floor, you remain there generally unnoticed until one of your uncles calls out your name.

“Couldja get me a refill?” Uncle Tim slurs, shaking his empty can of Bud Light to emphasize his request. Before you can respond, he throws a, “thanks, kid” and goes back to yelling at the football players.

It’s not like they can hear you through the screen, you snidely think, but you keep your comment to yourself as you pad into the kitchen. A collection of spices tickles your nose, the mixture of cloves and garlic and thyme and rosemary warming the room. You rummage through the refrigerator until you feel someone bump up against you.

“What are you doing in there?” Your aunt asks, disapproval carving her already sharp features. Her gaze drops to the can in your hand. “Seriously? Trying to sneak beer right in front of us?” she scoffs.

Grandma quickly becomes aware of the commotion, and she wipes her hand on her sunny yellow apron as she assesses the situation. “Everything okay?” Her soft eyes are concerned, not accusing, and you feel your anxiety slowly dissipating.

“I caught her trying to steal some beer,” your aunt reports proudly, as though she’s caught some serial offender, and you have to fight the urge to roll your eyes. “Not even a teenager yet and already getting into this kind of trouble.” She shakes her head with a tsk.

“No, I wasn’t,” you insist, setting your jaw in defiance. “Uncle Tim asked me to get some more for him. That’s all.”

“Tim!” Grandma calls out, tone thick with irritation. “Get over here!”

Uncle Tim trudges out to the kitchen, head already hung low in anticipation of the tongue-lashing he’s about to receive. He may be a grown man, but his mother can easily put him in his place.

Grandma folds her arms across her chest. “Why are you having your niece fetch your drinks like a barmaid? Your legs broken or something?”

“No,” he mumbles, taking the beer from your hand and haphazardly tossing a “sorry” in your direction before returning to the game.

“C’mere,” Grandma beckons you, crooking her finger to join her at the counter. She’s got a bowl of Granny Smith apples, half of them peeled, their green skins piling on the cutting board in front of her. She hands you the peeler, picking up a sharp knife and cutting a peeled apple lengthwise and cubing each slice. “Help me out. It goes a lot faster when there’s two of us. And it’ll keep you out of trouble,” she adds with a wink.

You grab an unpeeled apple from the pile and drag the tool down its curve, repeating the motion until the inner fruit is exposed before starting on the next one. You and Grandma work in tandem; you peel and she chops in a comfortable silence. As you’re finishing up the last of the bunch, she leans over and whispers in your ear, “Don’t tell anyone, but you’re the best helper I’ve ever had.” She starts placing the cubed pieces into a pot, shaking the cinnamon container over it until she takes a satisfied step back, no measuring spoon required. “Mix it together for me?”

You nod eagerly and pluck the wooden spoon from the canister behind the sink, dunking it into the pot and stirring until the apples are fully coated in cinnamon. “That good?” you ask, giving another stir for good measure.

“Perfect.” Grandma smiles, covering the mixture with water and setting it on an empty burner, twisting the knob until the coil turns red. “Once it softens up, you can mash it. Give these old arms a break,” she teases gently.

“You’re not old!” you protest, and she smacks a kiss to the top of your head.

“I love you, kiddo,” she murmurs, voice muffled against your scalp. “To the moon and back.”

You wrap your arms around her waist and squeeze her tight. “I love you, too. To the moon and back.”

Thanksgiving, 1996

“Daddy, look! It’s Santa!” Harris points at the TV excitedly, bouncing up and down on the couch. He kicks his feet and squeals. “He’s gonna come to our house, right? An’ bring me presents?”

Eddie chuckles as he spreads mayonnaise on white bread, layering thin turkey slices on top. Three sandwiches for three Munsons. “I dunno, Har-Bear; have you been good this year?”

Harris scrunches up his face in contemplation. “Um, I think so,” he answers honestly. “I can’t remember.”

“Hey, Wayne?” Eddie calls out as his uncle walks out of the bathroom. “Has Harris been good this year? I feel like he’s been a bit…mischievous.”

Wayne shakes his head. “My angel of a grandson? He’s never caused mischief a day in his little life!” He sits down next to Harris, letting out a small grunt as his bottom hits the sofa cushion.

“Yeah! I never cause mischief a day in my little life!” Harris echoes confidently. He turns to his grandfather. “Grampa, what is Santa gonna bring you for Christmas?”

“A toupée,” Eddie says from the tiny kitchen, piling their plates with potato chips. Normally, he’d make sure there was a fruit or vegetable on there, but it’s a holiday.

Wayne has to hold his tongue in front of the impressionable young boy, though he shoots Eddie an inconspicuous middle finger when he’s setting the plates on the coffee table.

The three Munsons tuck into their sandwiches and crunch on the chips. This is how Thanksgiving has been since Eddie moved back with Harris: watching the parade followed by an early lunch so Wayne could pick up a shift at the plant. He always insisted on it, saying that the holiday pay helps offset the cost of Christmas presents. It was quiet, but nice, and Eddie couldn’t ask for anything else.

“Y’know,” Wayne says to Harris with a mouthful of sandwich, “the first time your Daddy watched the parade was with me. And now, we got to watch it with you.” He bumps his arm against Harris’s, making the boy giggle.

“Oh, yeah,” Eddie muses, chomping on a potato chip thoughtfully as the memories flood back in. “Forgot about that. Is Snoopy still your favorite, Old Man?”

Wayne considers this. “Hmm. Who’s our favorite balloon this year, Har?”

“Clifford!” Harris answers without missing a beat, kicking his little legs in excitement. Eddie should’ve known; the boy was damn near obsessed with dogs.

Once we can afford a house with a yard, I’m getting you that puppy, Har-Bear, he thinks, though he doesn’t dare make the promise aloud.

“Then that’s mine, too.” Wayne brushes the crumbs off of his lap, calloused hands scratching the worn denim of his jeans. There’s a twinkle in his eye as he adds, “I wonder what Ms. Sweetheart’s favorite balloon is.” He acts like he’s speaking to Harris, but Eddie knows it was aimed at him.

Harris claps his hands together gleefully. “I know! Let’s call her!” He turns to Eddie with the sweetest puppy-dog eyes the man has ever seen, lower lip jutted out exaggeratedly in the most precious pout. “Please, Daddy? Pleasepleasepleaseplease–”

“Okay, okay,” Eddie says with a laugh, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand. “Once you finish up lunch, we can call her.” Harris opens his mouth to protest that he wants to call right now, but Eddie cuts him off before he can start. “Ah ah; no whining, or we won’t call.”

Harris harrumphs but ultimately complies, taking another bite of his food. Wayne gives Eddie a small thumbs-up, and he preens slightly at the acknowledgment of his parenting win. They didn’t happen very often, and they rarely happened when someone was around to witness them. He takes a long gulp of water; as soon as he does, his son lifts his own cup to his lips and takes a sip. Another reminder that he’s watching, even subconsciously, wanting to be just like his dad.

For a split second, Eddie allows himself to believe that that might not be a bad thing.

“‘M done!” Harris chirps; sure enough, his plate is clean, save for the bread crusts. He squirms a bit in his seat, a gesture that Eddie has come to learn means only one thing.

“Go pee while I find her number,” Eddie tells him, purposely omitting the fact that he’s already committed those seven digits to memory. In case of an emergency, he thinks, and I don’t have the slip of paper on me.

Wayne can sense that his nephew isn’t being completely truthful; as soon as Harris closes the bathroom door behind him, he starts in with a shit-eating grin.

“Y’don’t need to find her number, do ya?”

Eddie flicks off an imaginary speck of dust on his shirts. “Knock it off, Wayne.” But he doesn’t move from his spot on the couch, further affirming his uncle’s point.

“Look, Ed,” Wayne exhales, adopting a more serious tone. “You clearly like this girl. I mean, all Harris did was say her name and you smiled–don’t give me that look,” he chastises lightly when Eddie rolls his eyes. “I know you two didn’t exactly get off on the right foot, but all that seems to be in the past now, right?”

“Guess so,” Eddie mumbles. “But not hating me doesn’t mean she’s into me. Maybe she’s only being nice to me because of Harris.”

The older Munson pauses, scratching at the stubble on his cheeks; his reflex when he’s deep in thought. “One date,” he challenges, holding up his forefinger to emphasize his point. “Ask her on one date, and see where it goes.”

“Fine,” Eddie relents, the nerves already churning in his stomach. You’d just found this good rhythm together, and he was going to risk messing it up. Again. “I’ll ask her. But on one condition.”

“Whas’ that?”

“Don’t say anything to Harris.” He crosses his arms over his chest when Wayne chuckles. “‘M serious, Wayne. I don’t want him getting his hopes up. For Chrissakes, I gave her a tape and the kid had us getting married.”

“Fair enough,” Wayne agrees, clamping his mouth shut when he sees the little boy enter the room. “You wash your hands?”

“Yep!”

“With soap?” he presses, narrowing his eyes.

Harris heaves an impatient sigh. “Yes! Can we call now?”

Both Wayne and Harris keep their eyes glued to Eddie as he punches in the numbers. When it starts ringing, he holds out the receiver to his son. “Say hi and your name when she picks up,” he reminds him, grateful for the opportunity to collect himself before asking you on a date. He takes a deep breath, shoving his hands in his pockets and gnawing on his lower lip so forcefully that he swears it might bleed.

You got this, Munson. The worst she can say is no.

But that’s not quite true, is it? The worst you can do is laugh in his face, leaving him a rejected mess. Scratch that–the worst you could do is accept the date, have him fall head over heels in love with you, then leave him in the dust to pick up the pieces while you move on with someone better.

Maybe you won’t pick up the phone. Maybe he’ll have more time to–

“Hi, Ms. Sweetheart! It’s me, Harris!”

It was a small thing. Miniscule, even. Just your meager attempt at reclaiming part of the past that had been lost to time and disease. A simple family recipe, apples boiled and mashed into a sauce that you’d hoped even vaguely resembled the way Grandma made it. A tiny cut on your fingertip serves as a battle wound from peeling, the sweet aroma of cinnamon still lingering in the kitchen.

You try to convince yourself that it isn’t a big deal. It’s just applesauce. But the thought falls flat as you stare into the trash can. You can still see all of your work literally tossed away through the tears that blur your vision.

You’d left the room for two minutes, two goddamn minutes, and when you came back, the plastic pink bowl that held the applesauce was nowhere to be found. You could’ve sworn you left it on the counter, but maybe you’d already put it away? A quick scan of the refrigerator gave you nothing but a chill. Where the hell did it go? Were you losing your mind?

A rogue apple peel had fallen to the floor, and you scooped it up, flustered at how you could have misplaced an entire bowl of applesauce. Sure, it wasn’t as much as when you and Grandma made it for the whole family, but it was still a decent amount. Your foot presses the pedal that lifts the bin’s lid, and that’s when you see it.

“Grandma?” you choke out, looking over to where she’s sitting on the couch. She doesn’t respond, and you raise your voice a bit to grab her attention. “Grandma, why did you throw out the applesauce?”

Her empty gaze briefly flits over to where you’re standing, not even registering the burgeoning frustration and sadness coursing through your veins. “Wasn’t me,” she says flatly, scratching at the side of her nose with a jagged nail. Before dementia, her nails were always painted bright hues of red or blue; now, it was difficult enough to get her to leave the house for essential doctor’s appointments. You weren’t going to put up a fight trying to get her to the salon.

You know you should just close the lid and walk away instead of torturing yourself by continuing to look, but your feet are glued to the linoleum floor. A cold drop of something lands on your toes, and that’s when you realize that you’re crying. Crying over goddamn applesauce.

All you wanted was some semblance of normalcy, something reminiscent of life before Grandma got sick and your family still felt whole. But what you got was a thickening realization that you can’t relive the past, no matter how hard you try.

The ringing phone startles you from your wallowing. You have half a mind to ignore it, but you know that Grandma will just grumble about how she hates the sound of it, so you pick up the receiver and answer with a shaky, “H-Hello?”

“Hi, Ms. Sweetheart! It’s me, Harris!” A little voice chirps through the other end. You can hear Eddie mumbling something, though you can’t quite make out what he’s saying. “Happy Thanksgiving! What’s your favorite balloon?” There’s more hushed speaking from Eddie, and Harris huffs out, “Daddy, stop! I know what to say!”

“My favorite balloon from the parade?” you ask, biting back a giggle.

“Mhm! I like Clifford,” he tells you.

You’d kept the parade on in the background, catching glimpses of it every now and again. Shit, what balloons did you see? “Clifford’s a good one,” you agree, “but I think the Rocky and Bullwinkle one was my favorite.”

Harris laughs so loudly that you have to pull the phone from your ear. “The squirrel and the moose?” he guffaws. “Ms. Sweetheart, that’s so silly!” You’re about to ask him how his holiday is going when he says, “Hold on, my daddy wants to talk to you.”

Your heart skips a beat at the prospect of talking to Eddie, and you wipe the tears from your wet cheeks as though he’ll be able to see them through the phone.

“Hey, Happy Thanksgiving!” he says. Something resembling trepidation tinges his tone, though you’re not sure why. Could he still be anxious to approach you after he confided in you at the parent-teacher conference? After he’d watched you panic when Grandma locked herself in her room?

You swallow, trying to choke down the sadness rising within you. “Yeah, y-you, too.” Despite your best efforts, your voice breaks on the last word, and you hope Eddie doesn’t catch it.

But of course he does.

“You okay?” he asks with a nervous chuckle. “‘Cause it kinda sounds like you’re crying.”

“‘M fine. Just, um, chopping onions,” you lie, hoping you’ve done a convincing job.

“For the…applesauce you’re making?” Eddie sees right through you; you’d forgotten that you’d told him and Harris about your plan during your weekly post-tutoring dinner last night. “Not gonna lie, that sounds even nastier than olives on pizza.”

You manage a laugh, but it’s disfigured by the catch in your throat. “The applesauce was a bust, unfortunately,” you admit. “I left the kitchen for a second and Grandma chucked it in the trash.”

“All of it?” he asks incredulously, letting out a deep exhale when you confirm that she did, in fact, throw out the entire bowl. “Jesus H. I’m so sorry. Is that what’s got you upset?”

“Mhm. I know it’s stupid, ‘s just applesauce, but–”

“‘S not stupid,” Eddie interrupts softly, and you twist the phone cord around your pointer finger with the sudden drop of his tone. “I know you were really looking forward to it.” He pauses, and you wonder for a moment if the line’s gone dead before he says, “We’re coming over. Me and Harris. Be there in twenty; fifteen, if I don’t have to argue with him about wearing a jacket.”

Before you can protest, he really does hang up. You look down at the baggy sweats and college t-shirt you’re wearing; you weren’t expecting any guests today, let alone the Munson boys. You should probably throw on some actual pants, and a bit of mascara couldn’t hurt, either.

You find a pair of jeans that aren’t buried under a mountain of laundry and tug them over your thighs before quickly swiping some makeup on your face. It’s enough to mask your exhaustion while still looking natural.

It dawns on you that you’re not quite sure why you suddenly care so much about your appearance. Harris couldn’t care less, and Eddie…well, even if Eddie did care, why would that matter to you? He’s your tutee’s parent; a new friend at most. On more than one occasion, you’ve answered the door to Jess with a wicked case of bedhead. Why does Eddie Munson of all people make you feel the need to look halfway decent?

When the buzzer sounds, you nearly jump out of your own skin. “It’s us,” Eddie says into the speaker; the smoothness of his voice has your stomach in knots. “And we come bearing gifts. Well, one gift, I guess.”

“Fuck off,” Grandma mumbles from the couch, cranking up the TV volume to an ungodly loud level. One of the Law & Order detectives says–no, screams–something about a murder, and you quickly reach for the remote and click the power button.

“We have company,” you tell her, and she just grunts in response. Hopefully her mood will change in the minute it will take Eddie and Harris to get to your apartment. You can hear them down the hallway, so you open the door just as they’re about to knock.

Eddie takes a step back in surprise. “You psychic or somethin’?” he laughs, looking down at his son and giving him a small nudge. “Go ahead, you can give it to her.”

Your gaze drops to the curly-haired boy standing by his father’s side. He’s holding a brightly colored package of off-brand Oreos, which he brings closer to his chest, pressing it tightly against his zippered sweatshirt. “It’s s’posed to be a surprise,” he reminds Eddie, wide-eyed with genuine concern.

“Only until we got here,” Eddie says gently, soft brown eyes encouraging Harris to hand you the cookies. He brings his attention back to you. “I know it’s not the same as making applesauce with your grandma, but I’ve never been sad eating an Oreo. An oatmeal raisin cookie, maybe. But not an Oreo.”

Now it’s your turn to smile. “You may be onto something here, Munson.” You take the package from Harris and guide the two of them to the kitchen, calling out to Grandma as you pass by. “Grandma, Eddie and Harris are here, and they brought cookies, if you wanna join us.” Her non-response is familiar at this point; the sting is much easier to brush off than it was a few short months ago. But you still feel it.

Even though Grandma isn’t at the table, Harris still climbs onto his dad’s lap. “Daddy, can I have one?” he asks, resting his dimpled chin on his palms as he glances upwards.

“Gotta ask Ms. Sweetheart,” Eddie shrugs, tickling Harris’s ribs and loudly whispering, “and ask her if your poor, hungry dad can have one, too. She can’t say no to you.”

You open the package and shake your head at his antics, sliding out the flimsy tray and offering it to them. “Of course you can have one, Harris,” you say, tone saccharine sweet. His chubby fingers darting out and snatching up a cookie before you even finish your sentence. “But I don’t know about your dad. Do you think he should get one?”

“C’mon, Har,” Eddie urges him, “us men gotta stick together. All for one and one for all, right?” He flexes his bicep; it’s an attempt to emphasize the manliness that supposedly bonds him and Harris, but the gesture has your breath catching in your throat. You sputter and cough embarrassingly, excusing yourself to pour a glass of water.

“Anyone else want?” you manage once you can speak again, holding up the ceramic pitcher.

Eddie nods, lifting Harris from his lap and placing him on the nearest empty chair. “Here, let me help you.” He stands up and calls out over his shoulder, “Grandma, how about some water?”

You’re about to tell him not to worry about it, but to your surprise, she nods. “Ya.”

“So, four waters,” Eddie reports, taking the pitcher and refilling your glass.

You grab another just like it from the cabinet before taking two blue disposable ones, plopping a bendy straw in each. “Grandma, um, she needs stuff that isn’t breakable,” you explain lamely. “And the other plastic one is for Harris.”

Eddie grins. “Thought it was for me. Y’know, always making a mess.”

“Ah, but only of your life,” you tease. “You’re pretty good with basic human functions.” Your face burns at what you’ve potentially implied, but Eddie isn’t fazed.

“Y’know what? I’m gonna take my cookies back!” he pouts, crossing his arms over his chest in mock-indignance. A piece of curly hair sticks to his lower lip with his sudden movement, and you brush it away with your thumb before you can stop yourself.

The crinkling of the fake-Oreo package draws both of your gazes, with Eddie poised to tell Harris that he’s only allowed one more. But to your surprise—and perhaps Eddie’s, too—Harris isn’t the one rifling through the tray. Grandma’s taken a seat next to the boy, handing him a cookie before taking her own. She just nibbles on it in silence, but it’s the most present she’s been in days.

“Y’like Oreos, Grandma?” Eddie asks, pouring water into the two plastic glasses and carrying one in each ringed hand. He places them on the table, and Grandma brings the straw to her lips as she nods again. He pauses for a moment, lips tucked into his mouth as he ponders something. “What kind of music does she listen to?” he asks you.

“She has a record collection over in the living room,” you tell him, pointing to the low bookshelf near the door, “but we haven’t played any in awhile. She’s kinda…weird with noises.”

He considers this, walking over to the records and thumbing through them until he finds one that he recognizes. “Could I put this one on?” He holds up the battered copy of Frank Sinatra’s It Might As Well Be Swing. “I’ll take it off if she gets upset. I just wanna try something.” He carefully slides the record from its sleeve, lifting the player’s needle and placing it on the space for the first track.

There’s a soft static as the record starts to spin, and Ol’ Blue Eyes croons:

Fly me to the moon

Let me play among the stars

Let me see what spring is like

On a-Jupiter and Mars

Eddie joins in with the next part. His voice still carries its signature rasp, but it’s noticeably smoother, warmer than the night he’d dedicated the Def Leppard song to you.

In other words, hold my hand

In other words, baby, kiss me

His eyes remain trained on the record player, but you swear you can feel the lyrics drifting towards you. The melody wraps around you like a hug, and you momentarily lose yourself in a musical embrace.

Another voice, low and timid, chimes in. You have to stifle a gasp when you realize that it’s Grandma, her lips curling into the smallest of smiles–the most joy she’s shown in a long while–as she half-sings the words.

Fill my heart with song

And let me sing for ever more

You are all I long for

All I worship and adore

“Holy shit,” you breathe out, and before you can exhale the third syllable, the world shifts back to normal. Grandma goes back to mindlessly munching on her cookie as though nothing out of the ordinary had just happened. You turn to Eddie. “What was that?”

He shrugs, suddenly feeling shy. “I read somewhere that music can, like, bring back some memories. Not permanently or anything, but I figured it was worth a shot.”

You can’t stop yourself from flinging your arms around Eddie’s neck, nearly knocking him over in the process. He pauses before he returns the gesture, pulling you tightly into him. One hand is on the small of your back; the other gently rests on the back of your head, allowing you to rest your forehead on his chest. Your tears flow freely, leaving tiny wet spots on his shirt. He doesn’t let go until you start to pull back.

“Thank you,” you whisper; when he pinches his brows in confusion, you elaborate. “You gave me back a little piece of who she was before…” you trail off, swiping at your cheeks messily. “Just…thank you.”

Eddie nods, swallowing the lump in his throat. His eyes are practically glued to your lips; this time, when his fingers brush against your palm, he hooks his pinky with yours. “‘Course,” he murmurs.

You’re not sure how long the two of you remain linked like this, joined hands swaying ever-so-slightly as Fly Me to the Moon fades out to I Wish You Love. It’s somewhere between ten seconds and ten years, because time seemingly slows to a halt.

You might stay with pinkies hooked forever if Harris doesn’t bolt from his chair, hugging your waist and looking up at you with concern.

“Ms. Sweetheart?” he asks. His wide, misty eyes indicate that he’s absorbed some of the emotion in the room, though he may not even be aware of this. “Why are you sad?” His chubby fingers grab onto the fabric of your pants.

You choke out a tearful laugh as you crouch down to meet him at his level. “I’m not sad…well, I’m sad and happy at the same time,” you try to explain, shaking your head when you realize you’re only adding to his puzzlement. “Grown-up feelings are weird sometimes, Har. But your hugs definitely help.”

With that, he squeezes you tighter, and you glance at Eddie with a full heart. He takes a step forward, scooping up Harris. You worry that you’ve crossed a line, that you’ve shown too much of your vulnerability to a four-year-old, but your fears are subdued when Eddie extends one arm and brings you back to both him and his son. Something brushes against your scalp, and you realize that he’s pressing a light kiss to the top of your head.

Harris squirms, and when Eddie puts him down, he runs over to the TV set. “Can I watch something?” It’s clear that the moment has passed, and Eddie throws you an apologetic shrug as he waits for your response.

“Sure,” you say, trying to pepper cheerfulness into your voice. It’s easier now that the wave of loneliness has passed, taking with it some of the mourning you’d clung to earlier today. You click on the TV and flip through channels until a familiar cartoon appears on the screen. “I think we’re just in time to watch A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving!” you exclaim, and Harris mirrors your enthusiasm by flinging himself onto the couch, making his dad cringe.

“Careful, little dude,” Eddie says, clicking off the record player and gently placing the vinyl back in its sleeve. “You just got that cast off a few days ago. Don’t need you to break another bone.” Certainly don’t need another hospital bill, he thinks bitterly. He takes the spot next to Harris, silently begging you to join them.

You turn to the kitchen table and put a hand on Grandma’s shoulder. “You wanna watch Charlie Brown with us?” But she rejects your invitation with a simple shake of her head, mumbling something about being tired and padding into her room.

You take the empty space to Harris’s left so that the boy is sandwiched between you and his father. He’s a small kid, but it seems like there’s an entire ocean separating you and Eddie.

“Why’s Lucy so mean?” Harris asks no one in particular. “She’s always yelling. Like Ms. Marion.” You have to stifle a giggle at that observation, and when you allow yourself a glance, you see that Eddie’s doing the same.

The first half of the movie is filled with Harris’s constant commentary; he speaks more than all of the cartoon characters combined. But he tires out eventually, though in typical four-year-old fashion, he denies his sleepiness even as he’s yawning. He fights it pretty well, you’ve got to give him credit where it’s due, but eventually, the exhaustion takes over and he lays his head on your arm. His curls tickle your elbow, and you gingerly reposition him so he’s tucked up against your side.

“You can move him over, if you get uncomfortable or somethin’. Kid sleeps like a rock. Except, y’know, when I need him to sleep.” Eddie snickers as Harris lets out the softest, tiniest snore.

You return the laughter and shake your head. “Nah, I’m good,” you reassure him, smiling at the ruddy cheek pressed against you. “Don’t tell my other students, but Harris is the cutest kid ever.”

Eddie shrugs, but you can tell that the compliment tickles him. “Well, it makes sense, since his dad is a total stud.” He waggles his eyebrows before turning his attention back to Charlie and Lucy. You’re not quite sure how to respond to that; if you play it off as a joke, you risk hurting his feelings. If you tell him the truth–

“D’you like coffee?”

His sudden, seemingly arbitrary question snaps you from your indecision. “I teach four-year-olds,” you reply lightheartedly, hoping he can’t sense your mind continuing to linger on his stud comment. “I practically have coffee running through my veins. What about you?”

“I have a four-year-old, so, same.” He clears his throat, seemingly double-checking that his son is still sound asleep. His leg is bouncing up and down, and he nearly has to press on his knee to get it to stop. “Um, Harris is going to a birthday party next Saturday morning if you wanted to get some with me? Get some coffee, I mean.” He silently chastises himself, wondering if he’d ever been suave around women or if it had just been the unearned confidence of a young man in his early twenties convincing him that he had.

“Like...like a date?” Fuck, do you sound too eager? “Because if you feel like you owe me a date after…after our night at the bar, you don’t have to. I forgave you after you gave me those M&Ms, remember?”

“Yeah…wait, no. Hold on.” Eddie holds up his pointer finger as he collects his thoughts. He could deny that it’s a date altogether and throw out some bullshit lie about it just being something between friends. But he promised Wayne, promised himself that he’d give this a shot. “Yes, I’m asking you on a date. No, it’s not because I feel like I owe you one–although I definitely do,” he adds with a goofy grin that sends flutters to your stomach. “It’s because, fuck, I can’t stop thinking about you, and how happy you make me–and Harris, too–and how I get kinda nervous around you, which makes no sense because you’re, like, the nicest fuckin’ person ever. Oh my God, why can’t I stop talking?”

“Eddie.” The way you say his name is like a song he could replay forever. “I’d really like to get coffee with you. I just need to see if someone can watch Grandma…maybe Jess,” you surmise, biting back the fact that you’ll have to withhold your date’s name, lest she subject you to a lecture about sleeping with the enemy.

Eddie nods, swiping the tip of his tongue over his lower lip and smiling. “I can pick you up at noon? If Jess can watch Grandma, of course.”

“Noon works.” You want to kiss him right then and there; if Harris wasn’t nestled in the middle of you both, you might not hold back. “I can let you know on Wednesday when we have dinner together.”

Eddie’s not sure he can wait that long for an answer. What if you’re just buying time to get out of it? What if you’re only being nice to him because you’re afraid that he’ll get angry again and reignite the bitter feud you’d been locked in just a month ago? He swallows the insecurities, gaze flickering to your eyes.

And maybe it’s because you can sense his unease and self-doubt, or maybe it’s because you genuinely want to–Eddie doesn’t know for sure–but he feels you lace your fingers with his, resting your joined hands on his thigh. He shifts his grasp to weave them tighter together, learning back into the couch and allowing his body to relax. His shoulders let go of tension he hadn’t realized he was holding on to, and a contented sigh slips from his lips.

It’s you, him, and Harris. Sitting on the sofa and watching a holiday movie. An unconventional little family, but a family all the same. Eddie swears that he could stay like this forever, a thought that almost has him bursting out in laughter. The same man who had concocted an elaborate method to keep women around without actually committing to them was now reveling in domestic bliss.

When the movie ends and Harris begins to rouse, Eddie begrudgingly stands with an exaggerated groan. “These old bones, y’know,” he laments with a mischievous click of his tongue. “Everything starts fallin’ apart when you turn thirty.”

“You’re ridiculous.”

“Yeah,” he chuckles, lifting Harris onto his hip and rubbing his back to help him fall back to sleep. “I know.” He grabs his keys from the shelf near the door as you walk them out. And before he can wimp out, he leans in and presses his lips to your forehead in a gentle kiss, stubble scratching against your skin. His hands are trembling when he pulls away.

“You’re the best,” he repeats the same statement he’d made on parent-teacher conference night. It’s even more true now than it was then. “We’ll see you on Wednesday for pizza?” And an answer, hopefully a ‘yes.’ “Wednesday,” you echo, still processing the fact that, for the second time today, Eddie Munson’s lips have been on you.

@kelsiegrin @lma1986 @munsonology @stuckontheceiling @avobabe87 @eddapwinchester @peachysink @browneyes8288 @jeremyspoke-inclasstoday

@breezybeesposts @wednesdaymunson @feltonswifesworld87 @take-everything-you-can @bebe07011 @81rain @dylanmunson @oscarisaacwhore @eddiesguitarskills @everheart12 @etherealglimmer @hollster88 @wh0re4life @siriuslysmoking

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@rockstarmunsons @metalhead-succubus @boinkybarness @oohworldofpisces @costellation-hunter @toobsessedsstuff @meadow20 @theweasleyskettle @lost-in-the-stars03 @elizabethmidnight2017 @aysheashea

@chamomileh0ney @dream-a-little-nightmare @emma77645 @kurdtbean @sheneedsrocknroll92 @tlclick73 @lolly-in-a-strange-land @dylanmunson @bakugouswh0r3

@strangerthingsstories5255 @adaydreamaway08 @itsalltaken @harmfulb1tch @mimischaos @averagemisfit03 @steddiegarbage @vigilanteshit @ellendemeyer152 @sierrahhh @hiscrimsonangel @mrsjellymunson @idkatee

@quentinswife @eddiesguitarskills @momowhoo @jasminelafleur @mmunson86 @mcueveryday

#eddie munson #eddie stranger things #eddie x reader #eddie x you #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson x f!reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson smut #eddie munson angst #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fanfic #stranger things fanfic #fanfic #eddie munson stranger things #stranger things #tui

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chaifootsteps · 7 months ago

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tbh one thing i liked about the instas that i dont think the series will bring back is him wearing casual clothes outside of work. the concept of a gay male sinner from the 1940s embracing modern day fashion from the current era because of how cute it is without anyone caring because its hell, (with the implication he mightve been doing this for decades beforehand before he came to the hotel,) is just really cool concept to me :3 it gave him a fashion identity outside of his sex work (something the show really doesnt do at all,) and it let him explore a more cutesty side to his character, but in a really natural way! i also just liked it because most of the sinners we saw tended to stick to dressing from their era, which made angel stand out more.

but this isnt present at all in the series, and even weirder, the one time he has a chance to put on pajamas in episode 2 like the girls have, where hes alone in his room with fat nuggets, he doesnt. maybe we wouldve had time for that if there wasn't a joke dedicated to showing how tone deaf and christian charlies morals are for the bisexual daughter of lucifer morningstar.

all the clothes he wears, there's more of a focus of his outfits from posion rather then anywhere else. i hardly see as much fanart of that stupid ugly ripped finale suit, as much as i see fanart of the latex suit angel wears while singing about being unable to help swallowing poison. either that, or the outfit he wears while dancing with val. love the fluffy spider butt, but cmon. we can get an angel dust design thats more spider in a natural way, but we can't see him wear casual clothes when he isnt working? or even see him in a full suit? (i really miss the purple suit from the instas, no stupid pink stripes, full suit for both arms, and his boobs were out w his tie instead of being hidden away like they are in the finale, which was perfect for his character </3)

him wearing clothes separate to his identity as a pornstar also helped him reclaim some of his freedom under his contract, obviously being unable to choose what val makes him wear on set. that's what angel dusts actions reflected in the instas and the comics too. (the "work shit" box comes to mind, i hate that borderline on screen rape is fine for an amazon funded show, but a box of dildos is too much,) even the addict mv shows this, with angel wearing just a pink sweater and some purple shorts when laying with cherri. or even just the casual, but cute outfit he wears when he blows up that club with her.

its just one of the few things that made him feel human, especially when fashion is bound to change in so many ways when youve been in hell for 77 years like he has. this part of his character being missing (along with the implication he even has a life outside of his work in the series; pilot ad was coping with work with hard drugs, being an teasing asshole as a defensive mechanism, getting into turf wars and murdering mafia goons. but still dresses cute and gets to be cute w his friends in his own time! series ad is coping by self destructing and letting people drug and fuck him so he'll be "broken" but then gets better by going out once after being waterboarded at work, only to not relax and be a mom to a joke character at a club called fucking consent,) is one of the reasons im still bitter about the instas being nuked. but not the only reason.

viv will always takes the credit for them anyway, no matter if she feels they do or not, because her fanbase isn't smart enough to realize someone else wrote these stories they still love. even if theyll be the first one to remind you they arent canon, because the creator said they arent. but my honest to god confession is that sometimes the instagrams feel more like the canon hazbin hotel to me, even months after s1 dropped, simply due to the nuance and detail it has compared to the actual series. it wasnt perfect, but you could tell there was passion there- passion that now, only the leads are allowed to put in hazbin so their favorite character can get more screentime and attention.

Thank you, Anon, for this absolutely beautiful writeup. It was true, seeing the difference between the outfits Val forced him into versus the outfits he chose to wear on his own time was one of the most interesting aspects of Instagram Angel Dust. It was a more safe-for-work extension of the "work shit" dildoes that didn't make it to Amazon Prime (while his graphic on-screen gang rape did) and it was powerful.

Of course, there are practical logistical reasons why cartoon characters wear the same outfit, but if only one character in HH was going to have a big wardrobe, it absolutely should have been Angel. But of course it wasn't, because as far as Viv and Raph were concerned, the only Angel outfits that mattered were the ones that fed into their shared fetish.

#Anonymous #vivziepop critical #image reply #hazbin hotel critical #angel dust #actual blog post #viv stuff

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stoplookingup · 5 months ago

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Umbrella Academy S4 reaction (spoilers)

I'm a little surprised how negative the reaction to S4 has been. It's flawed and a bit too loose, sure, but I think there's a thematic arc, to do with the painful but redemptive potential of selfless love, that a lot of people didn't recognize, or didn't like, possibly because it's too sentimental, or too tragic, or both.

In particular, I have a really different take on That Relationship. You know the one I mean.

But before I get to that, I just want to address the issue of unexplained plot points, of which there are certainly many.

Short version: Just let it go.

Long version: Comic-book storytelling is all about the impossible premise, the unlikely twist, the overblown threat, the arbitrary race against the clock, the catastrophic non-ending. A big part of TUA's appeal is that it takes that formula to an absurd extreme, unwinding a plot so convoluted and horrifying as to be comedic, then offering a resolution that raises more questions than it answers, and that seems final -- but is it ever? There could always be more. Even now. Because reasons.

But scratch the surface, and it's really all about the over-the-top super(anti)heroes who are surprisingly endearing, nuanced and tragic, whom the audience roots for despite a million reasons not to. Would S4 have benefitted from a few more episodes? No doubt, mostly to give each character their due (Klaus, my Klaus, you deserve more!), and to let the story breathe a bit. The plot probably wouldn't have made any more sense anyway. But c'mon, did it ever, really? So, why a subway? Why a squid? Why a diner? Does it really matter?

On to That Relationship, the much-criticized story of Lila/Five (aka Live -- can I copyright this?). This comically trope-laden ship (forbidden love, montage love, love triangle, enemies-to-lovers, pocket universe, happily-ever-after, etc) fits right into TUA sensibility. Despite being a bit underbaked, it's moving. The actors play it well, and in dropping their characters' armor, you realize how much armor they're usually wearing, how hard they're always working to cover their feelings. Out of all the characters, seeing these two having real emotions is most devastating, especially with each other. It's because this pairing is wildly unlikely that it hits.

Lila and Five have similar histories as traumatized, sensitive souls turned cold, cruel killing machines. They're smarter, more cynical, and stronger-willed than everyone around them. And they are clearly starved of love and desperate for connection. (Everyone on this show pays a price, but I find Five's terrible loneliness the most heartbreaking of all.) So then fate throws them together in a way that makes it inevitable they'll form an attachment, only to then demand of them the ultimate sacrifice. Their surprisingly quiet, life-affirming, Guinevere-and-Lancelot love is redemptive, in contrast with the meddling, selfish, and/or destructive love of others: Reginald and Abigail, Ben and Jennifer, Gene and Jean. Live aren't an unnecessary digression, they're central to the thematic development of the story. Sacrifice saves the world, but without love, there is no sacrifice.

And yes, I absolutely think Lila loves Five to the end. And while I appreciate that some might find the age difference between the actors off-putting, I don't think there was anything inappropriate on a Doylist level, and it all makes perfect sense on a Watsonian level.

Also:

Aidan Gallagher and Ritu Arya are extraordinary;

the use of Baby Shark is genius;

Diego, Luther and Allison have been the least interesting characters from the start, and S4 does nothing to change that;

Viktor needs a sense of humor;

I love that alternate universes are all the rage these days (so many great tropes started with Trek), but tbh Loki does it better;

as visual representations of the space between realities, I love both the Loki automat and the UA subway, but at some point, using recent-past retro design to signal liminal space is going to get old, which, come to think of it, will be deliciously ironic.

#umbrella academy S4 spoilers #lila/five #aka Live #aidan gallagher #ritu arya #unpopular opinion

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nerves-nebula · 2 years ago

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Is there anything Splinter did to the others that even Leo at the time though was too far/didn't like?

Oh, plenty of things. I’ve mentioned a few things Leo regrets before that were BASICALLY entirely Splinter's fault (putting donnie in the corner, making the turtles spar until first blood, that kinda stuff) but Leo would be hard pressed to blame Splinter (at least at the time). Splinter’s kinda gotten in his head in a way where Leo automatically jumps to his dads defense because he understands his mindset so well, and he’s been fed all the excuses Splinter tells himself to justify his behavior.

Also, Splinter has a habit of punishing the others to teach Leo a lesson. For example, if Leo slacks off in training, Splinter might fight one of his brothers as a demonstration. Everyone knows it's not a fair fight, but it’s not about everyone else, it's about LEO. The whole point is that if Leo slacks off and falls behind he’ll be even more outmatched in a REAL combat situation. Stuff like that makes it hard for Leo to blame Splinter, because in Leo’s mind it's HIS fault his brother’s getting hurt.

THAT being said, there is one idea I’ve been batting around about Donnie (yeah he’s my favorite so unfortunately this is about him again.)

So, I’ve been thinking, obviously Donnie wants attention and affection from adults, but plenty of kids do and not all of them are so easy to manipulate/so visibly desperate to get away. And while he is partially based on me and is a slight exaggeration of how easy it’d have been to groom me, I also want to give him some of his own reasons for things. Yknow, like a character haha. ANYWAY enough rambling, here’s the vague outline of what happened:

Around 6-7 years old, Donnie was really stepping into building things, right? Little, simplistic robots and wind up toys and stuff. It’s hard to do that using only tech that’s been dropped into the sewers, but he manages. This is before he discovers the hidden city, too, so his only source of supplies is the sewers. He’d scavenge all day for parts. It wasn’t exactly a safe hobby, but it was fun.

Well, once he needed a part that wasn’t easy to get. Something small, but specific (being vague cause idk shit about tech or building things tbh) and he, being a small child, decided to see if they had anything in the house that would work. He went around asking his brothers, then checked all the communal spaces (kitchen, dojo, living room, etc) and finally ended up finding something that would work! In Splinter’s room! While Splinter was away getting food!

Donnie, once again being a small child, was not subtle in his theft and left multiple signs that someone had been there. Splinter asked which one of them had been in his room, and after a tense interrogation, Leo pointed out that Donnie had been rummaging around the place looking for something so it was probably him. So, Donnie admitted what he’d done.

In response, Splinter grabbed his arm, walked them o Donnie’s room and confiscated every single object Donnie had built. Toys, robots, the whole thing. He also confiscated any usable spare parts Donnie had been keeping as well, so that Donnie would have to start his search for parts all over again.

He never gave them back. No matter how much time passed, if Donnie brought it up Splinter would glare at him and basically shrug him off. Only Leo knows that Splinter destroyed them all, and sold anything useful. Which he only knows because Splinter revealed it to him in a very dismissive, flippant way years later. Leo’s never told his brothers, but Donnie’s figured there’s no way Splinter kept all his inventions.

I think Splinter does similar things to the others, like tear up a comic Mikey’s reading during training, or take Raph’s food and give it to Leo as punishment for Raph stepping out of line, but this was probably the least justifiable and most cruel time he did something like that. Just destroying all of a child's hard work and possessions to prove a point.

I was gonna have him crush all of Donnie’s inventions in front of him but I think there’s a different kind of emotion I wanna explore here. The slow, painful realization that your dad walked with you to your room, told you to stand in the doorway, and then stole all your most important things from you. He picked them up carelessly, not minding if they broke in his arms, and you never saw them again. He’s not ever going to give them back, because he didn’t even KEEP what he stole from you.

So yeah, no one was happy about that. They were pretty small, but it’s hard to forget something like that haha. Leo can still remember how hard and long Donnie sobbed once Splinter left :)

#nnstuff #teenage mutant neglected turtles #tmnt donnie #tmnt leo #ask #child abuse tw #nnart #neglected art

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summerwritesfics · 1 year ago

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🍓No Tricks, Only Treats

Pairing: Hanzo Hasashi/Kuai Liang Length: 1316 Words Rating: Teen Warnings: Costume Party, Halloween, Halloween Costumes, Halloween Party, Fluff, Bunny Girl Outfits, Kuai Is A Cutie Pie, Hanzo Has Vague memories Of Either MKvsDC or Injustice (whichever you prefer lmao) @anyfandomfluffbingo: Costume Party

Summary: Hanzo & Kuai Liang attend Johnny’s Halloween party.

AFG Fluff Bingo Masterlist

Notes: Heeeyyyyy Happy Halloween :) I was looking through my bingo prompts because tbh, I need to really start working on them, and I realised this prompt was perfect for a short little Halloween fic! So, enjoy!

Halloween was an oddity to Hanzo.

He didn’t really get the point of it if he was being honest. Trick and treating, while he could understand it being fun for kids, didn’t really sound appealing to him. Dressing in silly costumes even less so.

But when Johnny Cage invited you to a party, it was very hard to say no. Especially with Kuai Liang extremely enthusiastic about the idea, wanting to experience as much of what a normal life would feel like as possible. The fact that it was a costume party just seemed to excite Kuai more. He’d never worn a costume to a party before, the idea so novel that he’d been basically talking about it non-stop. The kids had offered to take him shopping for one and he’d eagerly agreed.

Hanzo hadn’t gone with them, and hadn’t seen Kuai’s costume yet. Due to their schedules they were also arriving to the party separately. He wondered what ridiculous outfit they’d managed to persuade Kuai to buy. He’d heard Cassandra pitch some ice queen outfit from some animated movie, but if that was the direction they’d gone in he didn’t know.

Hanzo himself had just gone kind of simple, and a little classic according to Johnny Cage. His pirate costume had been relatively inexpensive, and it was not exactly good quality, but he hadn’t wanted to spend a lot on something he was going to use once. The other guests' costumes seemed to vary in effort. Cassandra and Jacqueline had gone all out with quite intricate outfits. Supposedly they were a pair of supervillain lesbians, but Hanzo had no idea what they were referring to. Then you had Sonya, who’d thrown a bit of fake blood onto a blouse and called herself a zombie. According to Johnny, that was her outfit every year.

“Nice costume, Grandmaster,” a voice broke him out of his musings. He turned to find Kung Jin standing next to him.

“Thank you.” Hanzo looked Kung Jin up and down. He wasn’t completely sure on what Jin’s costume was, but given it was green and he had a bow and arrow he could make somewhat of an educated guess. “Are you meant to be Robin Hood?”

“I’m Green Arrow!” Jin sounded offended at the idea he was anything but this “Green Arrow” person. “Anyone would think you’ve never read a comic book or something.”

“Uh huh,” Hanzo sarcastically hummed. So he was also a superhero then. Seemed the kids were going for a theme.

From the corner of his eye, someone else peered around him. Even with an almost full face mask on, Hanzo could tell it was Takeda.

“I’m Batman,” he announced, putting on a gruff voice that made Jin burst into laughter.

“See, now, Batman I know,” Hanzo told Jin, lazily pointing at Takeda. “I don’t like him, but I know him.”

“What?” Takeda exclaimed, dropping the voice and standing straight. “How can you hate Batman?”

“I just have a weird feeling about him.” It was like something had happened in a past life in relation to the caped crusader. Which was absolutely ridiculous when he thought about it. Batman was a fictional character and didn’t exist, so the feeling was completely irrational. Still, something about it made him uneasy. He cleared his throat and quickly changed the subject with “so, what? Did you four convince Kuai Liang to be a superhero as well?”

“Nah, we let him do his own thing.” Takeda made a dismissive motion with his hand. “He seemed happy with what he got though.”

“Think you’ll be happy with it too,” Jin quietly chuckled as he took a sip of his drink. Hanzo couldn’t help but eye him suspiciously.

“What did you guys let him buy?” He asked, narrowing his eyes at Jin. He could just imagine that Kuai was about to walk in wearing the most absurd thing the kids could convince him to buy.

Jin bit his lip and smirked, “oh. You’ll see.” He then pointed across the room. “In fact, he’s here.”

Hanzo looked around just in time to see Kuai Liang walking into the party. His jaw dropped at what he saw.

Kuai Liang in what Hanzo could only describe as a bunny girl outfit.

He watched as Kuai was greeted by Johnny and Sonya, both clearly amused by what Kuai was wearing. It was a light blue bodysuit without straps and fishnet tights. He had a pair of bunny ears perched on his head, a small ball of fluff attached to his ass like a tail, and to top it all off a pair of high heel shoes the same colour as the bodysuit. Hanzo could feel his face getting hot, he completely understood Jin’s snide comment. Kuai did have a habit of wearing revealing clothing but this was the furthest he’d ever gone in public before.

“Have fun~” Jin sang in a teasing way, reaching under Hanzo’s chin and closing his mouth, teeth loudly clacking together. Hanzo glared at him, but Jin just laughed in his face. All Hanzo could do in retaliation was watch as Jin and Takeda walked away.

“Hanzo,” Kuai greeted cheerfully as he made his way over. The bright smile on his face was a beautiful sight. Even if Hanzo had originally had reservations about coming to the party, it was worth it to see Kuai experiencing pure joy from something so silly and simple. “I like your costume.”

“Ah. And I like yours,” Hanzo admitted, taking a better look at it now Kuai was closer. God damn he pulls it off a little too well. “Was this your idea or the kids?”

“A little of both,” Kuai explained with a sheepish grin. “I wanted to but wasn’t sure and they convinced me.”

It occurred to Hanzo that the kids' encouragement was probably an effort to make Hanzo flustered. Kenshi had warned him the group were on the warpath to break past the “Grandmaster Grumpyface” persona. He supposed this time, they actually won. He glanced across the room at them, where the four were now grouped together, watching Kuai and Hanzo, giggling to themselves over their victory.

They are the worst Superhero group I’ve ever seen.

“Apparently Sonya is jealous because my legs are nicer than hers,” Kuai continued, holding one of the aforementioned limbs up as emphasis. Hanzo snorted at that. “Her words, not mine, to clarify.”

“Well, I do agree with her, you do have fantastic legs.” Hanzo cleared this throat slightly as he stared at the body parts in question. “As well as other assets.”

“Other ass-ets?” Kuai questioned, stressing that particular part of the word, making it obvious what he thought Hanzo was getting at.

“That’s not what I meant,” Hanzo clarified with a huff. Kuai just tilted his head at him. “I mean don’t get me wrong that part of you is magnificent but it’s not the only part of you that is.”

The grin on Kuai’s face just emphasised the point. It made all the features on his face light up and just proved how beautiful he was. Hanzo couldn’t help himself, he lent forward to press a kiss on the tip of Kuai’s nose. Kuai snorted and pulled back slightly while gently pushing Hanzo away, which was exactly the kind of reaction he was looking for.

“Want to go get a drink?” He asked casually, trying to resist another kiss as Kuai’s cheeks were turning red.

“Hm, I could do with one.” Kuai lent forward slightly, bracing a hand against Hanzo’s collarbone. “Lead the way, Captain.”

Hanzo rolled his eyes in jest, but held out his arm so Kuai could link with his. Kuai gladly accepted, letting Hanzo guide both of them. The night was young, and as long as Kuai Liang had a good time, Hanzo was happy to indulge him until he decided it was over.

#mortal kombat #subscorp #kuai liang #sub zero #scorpion #hanzo hasashi #🍓afg fluff bingo

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abey-baby-apologist · 2 years ago

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clone high final episode spoilers below! (9 n 10)

holy fuck im so happy. even though im super annoyed how they keep throwing a bunch of really good ideas for relationships and plot in the trash- im just so happy with what we got.

OK FIRST EPISODE 9??? THE ANIMATION WAS SO FUCKING GOOD AND I HAD TO PAUSE BECAUSE WHEN WESLEY WAS FLAILING IN THE SEA, IT WAS DAMN smooth and pleasant to watch, as morbid as it sounds lol. that whole scene with the comic-esque vibe was so so pleasing.

and that whole episode was super like, sad but funny. i literally stood up and yelled when Mr. B was getting near the edge. like i probably woke up every single one of my neighbors in like.. a 50 mile radius it was that bad im so fucking annoying about this show.

BUT THEN SCUDS SAVED HIM AND I WAS SO HAPPY, LIKE THEYRE LITERALLY AN OLD COUPLE, AND LITERALLY THEY’RE FATHERS TO THEIR CLONE KIDS AND THEYRE ALL SUCH A BIG HAPPY FAMILY AND AUGHHHH im gonna draw family stuff with them so bad. I WISH THESE EPISODES CAME OUT BEFORE FATHERS DAY IT WOULD’VE BEEN PERFECT.

ok, episode 10 i have to take a deep breath with. i am VERY happy. and idk if it was because the bar was so low, or if it was because i was so anxious i was vomiting everywhere because i needed content so bad, but i am overjoyed.

THE ABETOPH CONTENT WE GOT WAS SO GOOD. WE HAVE LIKE... 3 NEW CUTE PHOTOS OF THEM HANGING OUT, AND LIKE A BUNCH OF MOMENTS OF ABE CARRYING TOPHER ON HIS BACK. was it because he was being tophers lackey? fine, sure, whatever. BUT AFTER THAT WHEN JFK BROKE TOPHERS PHONE IT WAS OVER (im upset it wasnt developed on further because people who didnt watch it in real time like us will surely be fine. so fuck you.)

Also, ABE AND JFKS FREINDSHIP HOLUYDBIUJEWNFJKNF oh my god not to be autistic but i was stimming so fucking hard WHEN THEY HUGGED, I WAS LIKE YES FINALLY. FINALLLLLYYY!!! theyre my sweet boys and THAT WHOLE FRIEND GROUP HAS ME IN TEARS. LIKE abe and Confucius are already bros, as we see them playing in the school yard, and JFK and Confucius are already bros from the sleepover episode, but NOW JFK AND ABE ARE BROS. FUCK. YEAH. oh and tophers there too. i like how they treat topher tbh. like hes just there until he says something out of pocket and they’re just like stfu.

but with the girls friend group.. oof. i honestly loved them so much, especially with cleo, but NOW ITS FUCKED. and its not even joans fault tbh. like when i was watching the scene where frida dropped joan i was like “damn” but then, JOAN MENTIONS HOW SHE HELPED EVERYONE BEFORE AND I WAS LIKE “DAYYYYYYUUMMMM UR RIGHT” so now im conflicted. But again like??? bruh i would choose cleo too tbh lmao.

Also, i’m glad clone college isn’t real. because jfk mentions about taking shelly to .. biology? which i think is a only 1st year class. and in the original clone high everyone is like “omg u hit puberty over summer” Which i feel is typically something thats potrayed in media AFTER middle school. but i could be wrong so, idk. just really glad they didn’t do the clone college bc i hate change. also theyre 16 lmao. OR MAYBE THEY WERE JUST TALKING ABOUT... in the future when highschools done?? IDK. IDC.

anyway. im scared for joans friend group and i fucking love joan, and i am in love with abe, toph, jfk, and Confucius’s little bromances and augh. im so happy. and THE CLIFF HANGER WASN’T TERRIBLE ALSO, IN MY OPNINON.

im just glad joanabe wasn’t endgame. i mean, i would be pretty happy because im a sucker for childhood friends to lovers but also NOOOOOO joan deserves better. so. yeah 10/10

if you read this far, holy crap, im proud of you, and ily

that is my review on the finale so i’ll be making so much content now that im not on the brink of collapsing everytime i think of clone high. like trust me im gonna try and stretch out this fixation for as long as i can. though im probably gonna draw a surplus of abe and jfk art bc they were my fav in 2020

#i fucking love you clone high #clone high finale #clone high episode 9 #clone high episode 10 #long post

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polyamorous-selfinserts · 5 months ago

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🐒🐌🐁🐅 :3!!!!

thank u so much for the ask ^-^ u didnt specify so i'm gonna do me n jason and roy

🐒 Who is the big spoon, middle spoon and little spoon?

- i think jay is definitely the middle spoon most of the time, and it really switches a lot of the time tbh. sometimes me n roy will both hold her when she needs that, and sometimes me n roy will both curl up under his arms and rest our faces against his tits <3 because our sleep schedules r so unaligned and unpredictable a lot of the time they're getting back after i've gone to bed, so they'll just flop onto wherever there's space in the bed. both me n roy run hot and jason switches drastically between furnace and block of ice, so a lot of the time it's is comically sprawling limbs. when it's just me n jason there's not really any spooning it's us pressed as close to each other as possible, face to face. when it's just me n roy we both get so sweaty that we just make do with resting our hands against each other while we sleep. my hand on his slutty little waist at all times lmao.

🐌 Who is more likely to fall asleep first? Who goes to sleep last?

again, our sleep schedules r super out of wack. i work night shift (3-11) and they work "nights," but i also sleep more than they do. because i'm not a child soldier and have a sleeping disorder. so a lot of it is them getting up before me (and apologizing softly when they wake me + forehead kisses augghhhh) and coming to bed after i'm asleep. either way though, i would fall asleep first because of my meds. i think jason has a hard time falling asleep, but roy conks the fuck out. being a dad means he's learned to take sleep where he can get it. it's very disorganized and all of us are adhd + autism solidarity so it's a lot of all of us on our phones/reading and then being like. "charlie u should go to bed" "roy we're in bed. and you're on your phone too" "nuh uh" "very mature guys" "jason you can't talk. when's the last time you went to bed before 6 am?" "when's the last time u slept for less than 10 hours" "oooohh" *cue aggressive wrestling*

🐁 Any headcanons you have about your polycule?

- i definitely headcanon jason as trans in some way, and usually use she/he pronouns for her. i think it's less of a labeled thing though in universe. jason is not self aware enough to know that about himself except for that he likes when i call him my girlfriend.

- jason has his own polycule that i'm like. adjacent to. i don't care who else he loves, as long as he comes home to me ^-^ roy just weaseled his way into our bed like the mistress he is 🙄

- me and roy's relationship is very much "we're both in love with this self destructive asshole and live together. i guess we're technically dating." like it's very much not something we would've landed into but we both keep jason safe and sometimes that means keeping each other safe too. the feelings are very much like. arranged marriage that develops into mutual respect and affection.

- none of us organize in the same way and it causes Thee Most Conflict around the house tbh. i don't care about your guns on the table jason, but you can't be storing the linens in the clothes closet!

- both me and roy are ready to fight bruce at the drop of a hat and it is definitely like. a guard dog situation. he drops in uninvited and me and roy are over jason's shoulder glaring him down with contempt and hate in our hearts.

- roy enjoys playing with the household technology. i enjoy it when my toaster doesn't speak. we are at odds on this.

- roy and jason talking about technology makes my brain swim, but i get back at him when me and jason are talking about magic. this is less effective than i would think because roy begins to understand after a while. i grieve my petty advantage. jason thinks we're both cute.

🐅 Do you have any pets? If so, what are they? If not, what kind of pets would you like to adopt?

- Jason has Dog! but tbh they're not home for consistent enough periods of time to take care of a pet, and i am not good at keeping things...alive. so. uh. no. maybe in 20 years when they're old and retired we can get a couple cats.

#f/o: we're dying to feel something #asks

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deregirls · 2 years ago

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In regards to lore there is comics on the official website you can get there by just putting tf2 comics into Google. And they start with a recap/summary of the lore to ease you into tf2 just as an aside, like outside of rp if you’re interested in learning lore it’s like. Valve is unhelpful and neglects tf2 so it’s very scattered. So yeah as well as the YouTube shorts there’s the comics. I liked tf2 a lil bit for years without even knowing they existed, sorry if you already knew they were a thing but just in case you didn’t I thought I’d say. Anyway I do feel you on being nervous about being able to do characters justice, usually I’m pretty good with being patient as someone learns bit by bit, but I def get it can be nerve wracking and a lot of mental energy. If you ever really want a pinstripe partner and you’d be willing to tolerate someone being ooc at first then I think I could give that a go btw. Just putting that there as an aside cause I can see he’s your #1 interest - I also don’t mind weird aus, tbh I love aus and I think they can actually make things easier depending because there’s less deep detailed lore to learn sometimes if you know what I mean. I played a little crash bandicoot as a kid, ripper roo is my all time faveeee lol, but it’s been ages so I’d have to learn a lot and research and yea it’d be clunky at first which I get not wanting to deal with enduring on your part. But just if you ever change your mind the offers there. Also Cassidy really is just MWAH, he used to be a major fo of mine years and years ago before I got sucked into tf2. Anyway tho good luck with moving and healing from your cold! If you want someone to dm and chat to I’m always open to that doesn’t have to be rp too. Take care

Oh ye I've heard of the comics and shorts!! Im like 90% sure I've watched/read a couple but its been like....a billion years and my memory is fuzzy lol. I do remember enjoying what i saw tho!!

And that's good thank u!! I wasnt a 90s crash kid sadly (i would have hated the games up until a few years ago bc i dropped anything remotely hard but now I'm the opposite and love challenges lol) but I've played the remakes, including the racing game (got obsessed w Pinstripe bc i was stuck on his boss fight for months and something just sparked from the rage lol) and I'm on the last level of 4...funnily enough my fiance isn't actively into it but they're OBSESSED with ripper roo and any time they see me playing they demand to see him. ("WHERES MY GUY I WANT TO SEE MY GUY") I've had to play him in nitro fueled or revisit his boss fights in the first two games often just so they could see him lol (sorry babe I'm focusing on warped now you'll have to wait 😔)

Thank you!!! Same goes for you!!

OOPS I MEANT TO MAKE THIS PRIVATE.

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dojae-huh · 4 months ago

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I knew this was coming

https://x.com/kathdew/status/1840425157820854608

Another anon

about that ILA episode - yeah, there’s a lot of factors that result in a lower rating. dy’s part of the episode aired second, after the first part where one of the panelists was hanging out with a photographer. i enjoyed it but there are lots of comments on yt under clips from that part that it’s boring, unimaginative, criticizing the panelist, etc., so this might have turned people off from watching the show. secondly, male idols aren’t interesting to the gp. there were comments that want to see more famous or interesting celebs than some sm idol. tbh, as i was watching dy’s part i had wondered if this would even be interesting to non-fans, lol.

dy episode clips have all surpassed the clips from the part with the panelist, they have more views, likes comments. dy’s kind act also trended on k-forums and on twitter and he has real life influence on the restaurant he went to - business will go up as fans will want to visit as well. i wouldn’t worry about ratings, that’s for tv producers to do.

Another anon

Well I read Knet comments on the last ILA ep. The low rating was a hot topic but the fact DY prepared gift was also a hot topic today. The reasons for the low rating, from what I read can be: a new rival program, the ep overall was not too great (the fixed cast first part was quite awkward), it was a night with great weather so ppl went outside a lot, many ppl like the guests doing more "exciting" things so DY can be boring to them (otherwise, many finds him comforting). Actually DY concept (or any idol, even Ahn Jaehyun is labelled as boring) in ILA can get kinda repetitive (doing something and going to eat or to the market) so I think it's better off for him as a semi-fix, coming as panelist sometimes and having one ep in a while rather than coming out too often.One of fixed cast, Kian94, who is considered more interesting than DY to a part of the viewers, can be really annoying and disturbing to watch because of his untidy and unhygienic habits. He was also criticized in a recent ep. Hwasa, who went viral thanks to ILA, decided to leave the program because of the self-pressure of being entertaining without faking herself. When it comes to variety, you always have to face with these problems.One thing for sure, DY is loved by the crew and gained new fans and opportunities from this.

-----------------

Link

Thank you for the context, anons. I would say, Doyoung's strategy of creating a sweet image for this show can backfire, but it won't harm in a long run. He will read the comments, think his actions over, try something new. As he always does. He adjusts, repeats what works, drops what doesn't. Even very seasoned show producers and old variety stars have missteps. It is super hard to interest a big mass of very different people. Additionaly, Doyoung aims for the national son, not a funny comic. He will interest the group that are succectable to his charms or what he portrays. As people discussing him doing this or saying that on inet demonstrates.

And the comment about Hwasa is very true. People have endless sources of entertainment. It becomes harder and harder to catch attention and make people stay. And any format becomes repetitive. What have worked before for one artist won't be possible to recreate for another one. Doyoung might need to learn that what works for k-pop fans, doesn't for gp. Or that it is more useful for him to go on shows where he can show his smart and his wit. Right now he is just entering the field and takes any job he is offered. Considering all these shows have the same people on them, when it comes to conenctions, it is still very good and profitable for him. One of the pannelist of this show already invited him to come to her own show (that upcoming yt programme with DoWoo).

Anyway. With situations like these it is useful to mark the event, commit it to the memory in case it will be important later, and not involve oneself emotionally. Media outlets need to sensationalise everything, and people on qoo need to chat about something daily.

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findtomorrow · 2 years ago

Text

( muse j / 25 / cis woman / she, her, hers ) — did you see CARLOTA “LOTTIE” HERNANDEZ PÉREZ wandering around the island today? they kind of look like BECKY G from certain angles? i heard around town that the RECEPTIONIST is CLEVER, and FRANK, but also CYNICAL, and INSENSITIVE. people say that they remind them of LAST NIGHT’S SMUDGED EYELINER, A SHINY UMBREON, and A FERAL KITTEN, and DISLOYAL ORDER OF WATER BUFFALOES by FALL OUT BOY is definitely their theme song. they seem like a nice enough person, but we all know how hard it is to keep a pristine reputation in a small town. ( admin jay / 26 / cst / she, her, hers )

✧*･ﾟ𝒃𝒊𝒐𝒈𝒓𝒂𝒑𝒉𝒚

first of all, lottie wants to butt in and inform you that it’s lottie, not carlota––and if that’s too difficult for you to remember, don’t talk to her at all. this is not a joke. you have been warned.

clearly, this attitude stems from somewhere, and it’s from being the middle child of her family of four (( ya girl had to get attention Somehow )). she has an older sister who she loves to hate and hates to love, and a younger brother who takes after every early 2000s disney channel show’s annoying little brother character. lottie was the resident goth stuck in the middle.

her dad split when she was in middle school with no explanation and left her mom to pick up the pieces and his massive credit card debt. lottie’s really close to her mom, but her mom is kind of a mess lmao. her mom writes trashy romance novels, and she’s really whimsical and fun...but she’s also impulsive and forgets when the bills are due.

a lot of that is because her mom grew up really quickly. her grandparents expected her mom to be perfect from a very young age, so her mom reverted to the child she never got to be once she got away from her parents––but y'know...we don't talk about generational trauma in this household.

lottie assumed the responsibility of being her mother’s keeper, and she’s pretty jaded because of it tbh. lottie vc: if you want something done At All, do it yourfuckingself.

she was Super motivated in high school and college. like she had to be the best at everything in school, and she had to get into the best universities with the best programs to prove to the world how fucking great she was.

it worked for a while. she graduated valedictorian from high school and with honors from boston u, and then she got accepted into the harvard medical program. she lasted a year and then flunked out.

lottie doesn’t talk about it ever bc like she’s so fucking humiliated that she failed, so most people wouldn’t know she went to med school at all. she kind of gave up on life after she dropped out of harvard.

her dreams were crushed, so when the hotel was hiring just about anyone with a bachelors to be a receptionist, she applied so that she’d have a paycheck to buy video games and comic books.

thanks for coming to my ted talk.

✧*･ﾟ𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕

so i know you aren’t technically Supposed to open with a disclaimer, but, disclaimer–lottie is annoying as fuck for a variety of reasons:

1) if you get to know her, she doesn’t shut up. like, i’m just apologizing for her in advance. even when she got her tonsils out, she just used a text to speech app to pontificate on eeveelutions and jason todd despite Many protests to stop.

2) she’s incapable of admitting she’s wrong. it will never ever happen. you know that scene in malcom in the middle where they show lois the tape of her pulling out in front of the car when the cop pulled her over, and she was like the tape is wrong. that’s lottie–and she’d like to point out that lois was proven to be right, thank you very much.

she’s a giant nerd. obvi. she’s obsessed with quantum theory, organic chemistry, and biology, specifically, but also, y’know, ridiculous superheroes and anime.

she’s also a punk nerd; music is v, v important to her. her favorite bands are probably fall out boy pre-mania, blink before tom delonge left for the final time, green day always, the offspring, and sum 41. pls roast her. who does she think she is.

also, not a personality trait but v important, she was a goth in high school, and not a cool one lmao.

she doesn’t believe in relationships bc she’s like that’s so much effort for so little reward, so she mostly sleeps around with men who she knows are completely wrong for her no matter the consequences.

she’s a not-so-secret pessimist. it’s v annoying, and i’m sorry.

✧*･ﾟ𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅

best friend: ( m, f, nb ), squad ( m, f, nb), childhood friends: ( m, f, nb ), roommates: ( m, f, nb ), fwb: (m, nb), casual hookups ( m, nb), ex: ( m, nb )

all the connections tbh. slide into my dms, or like this and i’ll hit you up !

#khintro #bio

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mewberii · 4 years ago

Text

Streamer!Scaramouche [2]

thanks for all the support in the first part! i wrote a second part where scaramouche plays genshin + the reader comes in (i tried to make it as gender neutral as possible, so let me know if there’s something off!). you’re a close friend of scaramouche and also a voice actor!

i had been planning this since i wrote the first part, but because i was busy and uninspired i couldn’t finish it. but here it is and it’s actually pretty long (over 5k words...)! i hope you guys will like this!! obviously he’s a little nicer than he is in game but,,, for the sake of the plot + it being a modern au, it had to be done sjnfdskjf

He was selected to play the beta for genshin because of his popularity and tbh he really wanted to play it

The game hadn’t really caught his eye all that much when he first heard about it but he saw how everyone online went crazy over it (plus other streamers who also were selected to play it in early access kept talking about it) and he became more curious to know what it would be like and if it’d live to everyone’s expectations

However he couldn’t really play it until it was officially released because he had a very busy schedule, and when he saw other streams of people playing it he was,,, lowkey jealous because it did look fun

When it was finally released and the game finished downloading and installing, he went live right away

And since so many people were looking forward to seeing him play plus the game was getting so popular so fast, that stream of when he first played hit his biggest milestone of live viewers ever

ANYWAYS skip forward to further into the game

when it comes to the gacha,,,

we’ve established that this boy is loaded. he won’t hesitate to throw some big amounts of money at the game to get every single character and weapon he wants and get their constellations to the max

i feel like he’d make little bets (and it works as a way to thank the chat for the support) like “if i get (insert newest character) in the first 50 pulls, i will gift 50 subs”

he’d be SOOOOOOO LUCKY it’d make everyone who doesn’t play think that it must be very easy to get the 5 stars or that the drop rate must be very high,,,

so in the end he’d have to gift the subs and it’d be funny to see the chat go absolutely crazy because everyone is commenting at the same time trying to see if they got lucky too and got the sub

but the chat goes so fast that they can’t even see their own comment after they send it sNDJGDJSK

he’d end up turning subs mode on for a while because it goes crazy

and that’s when he’d see people going “I GOT THE SUB-” all excited and he can’t help but chuckle and congratulate them for being one of the lucky ones

probably another game he can use to play with some subs once in a while! they could play co-op and when he’s a very high level he’d go to the worlds of some of his subs with lower level to help them with whatever they need

SO, LITTLE SKIP HERE

this is where i want the reader to slide into the picture

you’d be a voice actor, and also you have been a friend of his for a very long time

he met you even before he started streaming and you were always so supportive of him, as he was of every and each of your dreams

in fact, he would have invited you over more than once to stream with him

people don’t say anything bc they’re afraid of scaramouche banning them (it’s happened before) + they understand it can be disrespectful... but…

some people lowkey ship you two a little bit,,,,,, you didn’t hear it from me. scaramouche don’t ban me----

so one day he’s making another livestream playing genshin (sponsored by mihoyo to promote the newest update and event) and they’re going to release a new character

AND he has told everyone that you are the voice actor of the new character, who will be introduced in the event and is also getting their own banner

so everyone is very curious of what they’ll be like, if scaramouche will try to get them (obviously he will, he has every single character…. the amount of money he has put into the game…. just thinking of it gives me the heebie-jeebies)

could he even,,, main them,,,,

spoiler: he won’t because he’ll stay honest till the end (and no hard feelings) but there are other characters that he has built up to the max just like them and still work better with the way he plays but he’ll still find a chance to use them often

he didn’t know anything of what the character you voiced would be like because you wanted to keep it a surprise and he knew his audience would enjoy seeing his first reactions

I think the character you voice in the game would have the role that Scaramouche has in the actual game, and their design would be fairly similar (maybe similar color palette) to the design fans made for him as a genshin character (the one i mentioned that he uses for popup notifs of subscriptions and all!)

needless to say he’d absolutely love their personality and the charisma you showed in their lines

of course when he finally gets them he shows everything about them including all their voice lines and he compliments y/n’s voice acting… that was the first time people suspected that....

mayhaps… scaramouche….

has feelings for you....

it’s in the soft gaze in his eyes,,, the gentle smile on his lips,,, his soft voice when saying “I think this one is my favorite line of theirs”

and just how BRIGHT AND BEAUTIFUL his laugh sounds when someone comments he should invite you and ask you to do that voiceline live for him and everyone else

he’d jokingly reach for his phone and be like “should i call them? i could”

(but he wouldn’t because he doesn’t want to disturb you, you may be busy, considering you still hadn’t replied to the messages he sent to you before he started the stream a few hours ago)

if anyone dares be mean to you saying you got the chance to voice act for genshin just bc of scaramouche

or implies that he did something to get you there he’ll get quite mad even tho he won’t speak up about it (he might if enough people say it)

people can see something shift in his gaze,,,, and he bans them permanently right away

it’d be kinda funny when he does those “reading unban requests” streams and he goes past immediately rejecting people who said those kind of stuff, not even reading the apologies JSNKJFNDSJKGNSDK

some people say he’s too strict about it but literally his stream his rules. people who don’t like him should just not watch him

and people who like him should NOT speak badly about you or doubt your talent and effort, which is what brought you that opportunity in the first place

one day he’d be streaming playing the game, he had been using your character and gathering materials to get their last ascension

and at one point he’d grab his phone and look at the screen for a second before putting it back down and saying he had planned something else for tonight besides playing genshin for a while

then, the doorbell would ring (before he could even close the game-) and it’d be heard from his setup room so people in the chat heard it and they’re all like???

it’s definitely not takeout because scaramouche never orders takeout when he’s on his own, he usually cooks for himself and just orders it when he’s with friends and they all feel like eating something different

actually, offtopic, but i have a feeling he’d be very responsible when it comes to food and like he’d cook himself proper meals all perfectly balanced and all- he could afford having someone cook for him but his house = his privacy and personal space so he’d rather do it himself

it’s like, past 10pm, so no way it would be a package or mail at that time

and then he says “we have a visitor tonight”

and then the chat goes crazy saying “CHILDE” “HARBINGERS” but mostly “Y/N!??!?/PLEASE LET IT BE Y/N”

AND IT WAS YOU!!!!

and omg you brought takeout--------

it had been a while since they had seen you in scaramouche’s stream and you didn’t have your own channel (even though there were many people who encouraged you to open one)

SO everyone was very excited

i feel like scaramouche wouldn’t be the biggest fan of eating on camera so you guys would put the food away so that you can eat it later on your own without an audience

and you two would just spend a while talking to the chat, watching videos

AND reviewing fanart and fanmade content together!! it’d be so cute especially fanarts of the two of you together, little animatics or comics of funny clips or memes from his streams of you two,,,

someone made a little felt plushie of the genshin character you voiced and the way you COOED because it was SO cute

only those who were truly paying attention were able to notice the soft smile on scaramouche’s lips and the way he looked at you as you gushed over how cute the little plushie is and how talented the person who made it is!!

also you’d tell him you saw signora make a stream where she talked to some of her fans on discord individually to give them advice on their life/problems (nothing too serious) and it was very funny and you wanted to do that with him someday

and he’s like “that… could be a huge mess. people could say some crazy stuff” and you’re like “NO but i talked to her about it and she said she got her mods to talk to them first and approve them before they moved them up to the channel where she was to talk to her”

and he’s like “still…….. what if people lie and then when they get to talk to us they say something-”

and you’re like “BOY!!!! DO YOU NOT TRUST YOUR FANS *GASP*” and everyone in the chat is also going “GASP” “HE DOESN’T TRUST US…” “IS THIS YOUR IDOL…..?” “SAY SORRY” (all good fun, obviously he’d love to talk to everyone if he could make sure there won’t be anything disrespectful said)

SO!!!!! you two say you’ll plan to do something like that soon and everyone is very excited, they can already tell it’ll be both super cute and hilarious

before he ends the stream, you two watch some videos together

some are about some upcoming videogames and he talks about them and what he knows and explaining things to you... he is.. so knowledgeable…

the way you look at him as he goes into a little rant about it… cinematic parallels with the way he looked at you before

ONCE AGAIN, people aren’t blind. they notice. but they keep it to themselves bc scary scara (the way i had to resist overusing this one joke with his name-)

so the stream ends and you two walk out of the setup room to go to his living room and eat the takeout you brought while watching something on tv

he apologises because the food is cold now, but you brush it off saying it’s ok, you had missed being on his streams and you two can just heat up the food again

he doesn’t look at you in the eyes as he mutters that you know you can join his streams whenever, and instead just says it as he makes his way to the kitchen to heat the food

you join him in the kitchen soon after and tell him you also bought something for dessert and put it in the fridge already before

and honestly he didn’t know how much he wanted to eat that dessert until it was in his fridge, so he can’t stop himself from sighing and saying “god, i love you”

there’s silence for a second, right as the microwave beeps as it finished heating the food

it feels eternal to him, but you immediately started laughing and said jokingly “of course you do! you’re welcome!”

he’s happy you took it as a joke because that’s not how he planned to confess (he didn’t plan to confess anytime soon in the first place) but at the same time ?? he’s lowkey offended inside because? you took it as a joke?? is it so unrealistic that you wouldn’t even think that he meant it romantically?

it’s at that moment that he realises that if he didn’t want to confess before, now he does.

he wouldn’t want anyone to know about how he let that slip because he’s sure no one in you two’s friend group even knows he likes you

but you,,, actually,,,,, were actually caught off guard too because scaramouche wasn’t precisely one for words of affection and he showed his care for everyone with his actions

in fact, you had never heard him say those words before but well- it was kinda nice- if only he meant it as you feel it- but he couldn’t, right? who’d confess their feelings so casually while looking at a dessert in the fridge with desire-------

that night, it gets pretty late and to be honest he’s a little too tired to drive you home as he usually would, so he asks if you’d like to sleep over

it wouldn’t be your first time doing so, not even the first time you stayed unplanned, and he had a couple guest rooms that you could use so you accepted

also, staying for longer meant you could keep watching some more of that series with him without worrying about it getting late

or,,,

“actually” you said in a low voice, almost a whisper, since it was getting late and you two had been in complete silence while watching the series “i lowkey still wanted to stream some more”

he scoffs but then lets out a short chuckle, replying in the same volume

“it’s past 2am, who’s going to watch me stream now?”

“i would” have mercy for his poor heart- “but i’d be the streamer too this time so it doesn’t count”

“what even would we do”

“can we play that co-op game you played with childe? it was so much fun”

had you not brought it up, he wouldn’t have offered that ever because? if he had recently played it with childe he didn’t want to stream it again and make it feel repetitive for his audience

(jokes on him because when genshin came out they put up with it being the only thing he streamed for over a week. they’d rewatch any game if it’s you two playing it)

but to be honest, he didn’t really want to stream anymore that day and just wanted to be with you, just you and no one else

he got up from the couch and walked towards the hallway, making you look up to him in confusion for a second, but then started getting excited knowing this meant he was going to let you play it with him

“i don’t really feel like streaming anymore today, but we can still play it. let’s go”

the next day, you two wake up around the same time and make breakfast together

scaramouche i feel is not very talkative in the mornings

in fact, i feel like he’s just not the most talkative in general. he’s more the type to listen, but it’s different during his streams because he’s doing what he loves and talking about what he loves

and when it comes to you and he talks more it’s because he’s talking to who he loves----

before you’re going to leave and you’re standing at the door about to say goodbye to him, he suddenly speaks up before you can

“do you want to go somewhere tomorrow?”

you raise your eyebrows in curiosity from the sudden request, but then smile at him and nod

“yeah sure! what do you have in min-”

“it’s a date” he said, interrupting you, which was weird enough of him (since he would never interrupt you), but his words were even weirder-

“h-huh?” you felt the heat rising to your cheeks, and scaramouche just repeated his words

on the outside, he looked so casual and just, confident- bUT INSIDE he was actually panicking a little bit

but just a little bit.

After a moment, you smiled at him again, this time somewhat more shily but also excited for your date!

“I look forward to it”

Just with that, you two knew you had made the first step

You weren’t just friends anymore

You two had hung out on your own many times before, in fact and as it was mentioned before, you two had even slept over at his house or yours many times before

but it had all always been purely platonic, and you guys had never even questioned that aspect of it even after realising you had romantic feelings for each other

he’d spend the rest of the day thinking of what you could do the next day, as if he hadn’t been brainstorming for ideas all night either

i feel like he hasn’t gone in many (if not any--) dates before

solely because he has never been interested in romance plus he had never liked someone or at least, not as much as he liked you

and even when he found out he felt something for you, he just always told himself he was okay with how things were, because he’d never experienced anything beyond friendship and didn’t feel the need to try and maybe ruin the friendship

SO he didn’t have many ideas of what a good date could be

he definitely didn’t want a cliché corny date, but he really didn’t have any idea of what was good enough for a date

(and if for future dates you want something he’d consider a “”cliché corny date”” he’d do it for you and actually enjoy it)

the last thing he wanted was to have to ask you what you could do for your date

1- because he didn’t want to show you any side of him that didn’t look like he always has everything under control and he’s always composed (as if you wouldn’t want to see every side of him, even his most vulnerable sides- you’d have to work on that with him when you two become official)

2- he… kind of wanted to surprise you…..

but it really got to the point where he really didn’t know what you’d like the most (or what he’d like the most too) and what he wanted most over anything else is to not disappoint you in you two’s first date

SO he finally texted you asking if there was anything special you wanted to do (and therefore indirectly admitting he……….. just really wanted to ask you out. so much he did it without thinking of what he’d do if you said yes--)

you didn’t seem to mind, and in fact you were happy he asked for your opinion

overall, scaramouche was very independent so he wasn’t one to ask others for advice, opinions or anything, much less for help regarding anything

“how long has it been since we last went to the arcade? we could go there! i heard from childe that they added new games!”

and he’s like !?!?!?? THAT…. is…….. the perfect idea

“that actually sounds perfect” he admitted, and the message brought a big smile to your face

“just don’t get mad at me when you lose at all of them” he sent right after, teasing you, and you couldn’t help but let out a laugh out loud

“the last time i won in your favorite game” you reminded him, and even after he read your message, he took a little bit to reply

(he needed a second to put the pieces of his pride together SJNFKJDS)

“don’t get used to it, it won’t happen again”

“we will see about that” the more you two joked like this, the more excited you got thinking about tomorrow

scaramouche was sure now that it’d be a great first date that you’d both remember forever

the next day, it was almost the time for the date and scaramouche was going to pick you up at your house

i feel like scaramouche would be very fashionable and even in his style he doesn’t try to hide that he’s loaded…

not that he cares about buying cheap clothes, literally he’d say if he likes it and it’s good (aka it’s not cheap because it’s made of something that won’t make it last longer than 3 weeks) he’ll get it

but it just so happens that many times… the clothes he likes most are from famous brands…

AND THIS DAY!!!!!! he’s putting together one of his favorite outfits because it’s a special day

it almost hurts me just how nonchalant he’d look on the outside, making it a little hard to know exactly just how much this date meant to him (because as i said he’s not one to be very vocal about his feelings or even his thoughts)

BUT i trust that you… since you know him well…. can see past all that and you know that this is not just anything casual to him. this is special.

STILL!!!! he’d try his best to not let the blush rise to his cheeks and show, as well as to not let his voice shake when he complimented that you looked very good

ANYWAYS i think i think Scaramouche wouldn’t be one for big pda

the most he’d do where anyone can see is hold your hand or put his arm around your waist

WHICH IS WHY he’d try to be all smooth (and he would manage) reaching for your hand and lacing his fingers with yours

he wouldn’t make eye contact because then he’s sure it’ll show on his face that he’s getting somewhat flustered, but he’d still ask if you’re okay with it, to which you said yes

the area where the arcade was is always somewhat crowded so when you two were getting there, scaramouche would tighten the grip on your hand a little bit to make sure you wouldn’t let go and you’d be pulled apart by people trying to walk past however they can

you know that if you two got serious about your relationship, he would want to be the first person to share the news with his fans

BUT since he was so popular now, you two lived in a pretty big city and now were at a popular area (+ scaramouche wouldn’t be the type to try and hide his identity because he’s never had people make a fuss when they recognise him)

you were a little worried someone would see you two and maybe take a picture and post it online and it’d go viral before he can admit it himself

because of that, you end up throwing back to him the question he had asked when he held your hand

“are you sure this is okay?”

your question confused him because he didn’t know what you mean, so he finally looked you in the eyes and waited for you to explain further

“it’s just- what if somebody sees us and recognises you?”

he looked away from you and back at where he was going, taking a few seconds to answer before he just shrugged

“i don’t care”

you softly let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding as you waited for him to say something, and almost missed the way he whispered

“as long as it doesn’t affect you”

for someone who seemed and actually tried to seem to self-sufficient, who appreciated his friends but was also okay on his own because he was absolutely comfortable with himself, he was actually…

more selfless than people would ever know, especially when it came to you

you two would have SO much fun in the arcade, trying every single game many times

this time though, scaramouche won in his favorite game so he lived up to his words

you two won so many tickets you literally didn’t even know what to do with them once you got the couple prizes you were interested in

you bumped into a couple fans of his, so you talked for a while

once again, you were met with suggestions of opening your own streaming channel, and even scaramouche said “i’ve told them that many times too, but they always say they think their streams won’t be fun enough”

and the fans are like “NO!! literally everyone thinks you’re super nice and fun!! of course you don’t have to if you don’t want to, but we’d love it!!”

one of the fans (exaggerating a little as a joke) said “i’ll be your number 1 fan i swear” and the three of you laughed, except scaramouche who just scoffed and smirked

“i am ALREADY their number one fan. but good try” <- scaramouche in his head. say it outloud u coward.

but at the same time it was a joke scaramouche chill pretty much everyone knows you’re their number one fan……. even though you think you’re so smooth………. they just don’t say anything

they were very nice and fun to talk to and you knew scaramouche and you didn’t really want anything else from the prizes, so you offered you two’s tickets to them

“we don’t really need these anymore so maybe you’ll have more use for them!!”

they got SO excited, the way their eyes lit up :( scaramouche is convinced you’re an angel but he’s also very happy to see how joyful his fans got because those were more than enough for the prize they really wanted-

so after that cute little interaction and having used up your energy for competition, you two leave and think of buying some ice cream or a milkshake or something to end the date nicely and to enjoy while you walk back home

the arcade was not exactly very close to where you two lived (it was far from your house, but even farther from his-) so he asked if you were okay with walking back or if you two should get an uber or something, to which you said you were okay

walking back with him meant!! a little more time you could spend with him

and he was happy you said that because he was feeling the same way and still didn’t want the day to end

we’ll see more about the kind of things he likes and dislikes if he’s released as a playing character BUT FOR NOW i really get this vibe that he’d LOVE boba tea

i even think he’d?? enjoy tea in general??? classy boy…

SO you two would end up going to get some boba

it was very touching how, when reading the flavors they had that day, he suddenly and casually went “oh, they have your favorite” and you looked at the one he was pointing at and !!! indeed it was your favorite!!!!!!!

he remembers this kind of details very well

you take the chance to talk some more as you’re walking home

scaramouche asks about your job with voice acting and you tell him that you actually have been recording some new lines for your genshin character lately because in the next update there’ll be an event involving them

he’s looking forward to it but he teases you a little asking if it’s okay for you to spoil him with such information

but it’s okay because it’s not like he’d tell anyone, especially knowing it could get you in trouble

when he drops you off at your house, he has a hard time saying goodbye

literally you’re standing at your door and he’s in front of you, a couple steps away, looking away from you

you don’t say goodbye either, mainly because you know scaramouche is working the courage to say something, and you can also sort of guess what he wants to say

you think of saying it first, but then think that it would make scaramouche proud to be honest about his feelings and confess first

“i’ve liked you for a long time”

you can’t help the smile that makes its way onto your face, unconsciously reaching a hand up to slightly cover it

“i feel the same way” you replied to him in a soft voice

he took a deep breath and exhaled it softly, finally lifting up his gaze and making eye contact with you

it was already dark outside, so you couldn’t appreciate the faint rosy blush on his cheeks well

“can i kiss you?”

your eyes widened for a second, not expecting him to ask and if anything, thinking he’d just step forward and do it

so you were a little embarrassed and caught off-guard to reply properly, so you just nodded and put your hand down as he took the last couple steps and his face was right in front of yours

he’d cup your cheek in one of his hands, feeling the warmth of your skin

you closed your eyes, and he looked at you for a second longer before he finally leaned in and closed the short distance that separated your lips

at that moment you both knew that you had been missing on so much more when you two just settled and were content with your friendship

but!! that was about to change now, so it was all worth it

after that, scaramouche would make clear that this would be the first day of your relationship!! and even if he didn’t say it with words, you could just feel his happiness!!

so!! after that, because of work you two got a little busy the next couple months so dates weren’t very frequent

or at least, they weren’t dates like the one you first had

but still whenever you two were free he’d go over to your house, or you’d come over to his to play, stream together, or literally just spend time together doing anything

he wouldn’t let people know you two had started dating straight away (if anything, only his other streamer friends -aka you two’s friends in common- knew)

but the day he said it, he wanted you to be there

SO one day you two were streaming and you were currently reacting to one fanart of you two together

so he looked at you and you made eye contact and it was like you two spoke with your eyes like

“do we tell them now”

“let’s tell them.”

so scaramouche would clear his throat and without closing the fanart, he’d say he has something he wanted to announce

everyone was excited thinking it’d be some new project, maybe involving you

maybe some merch??? and the fanarts had reminded him of it???????

BUT THEN he straightforwardly said

“y/n and i are dating”

and everyone goes aBSOLUTELY CRAZY

amidst the chaos, you two catch a comment saying “will you unban the people who shipped you two” and you laugh

and you look at each other like “did you read that one?” “yeah”

and scaramouche is like “yeah, i guess i will have to unban some people”

and when some get unbanned they’re like “fREEDOM!!!!”

and jokingly they’re all like “APOLOGISE!!!!!!!! SAY SORRY!!!” so he just laughs and you join them being like “!!! apologise!!! you banned them for it and!! look at you now!!”

so he ends up trying to hold in another laugh as he mutters a halfassed ‘sorry’ and everyone starts commenting claps and hearts and celebrating that he apologised. now justice has been made.

the rest of that stream suddenly feels livelier and brighter!! you two are laughing a lot and so is everyone in the chat!!

and also the new genshin event would’ve already just been released that same day so you can talk about some of your experiences with recording or what you thought of it

and scaramouche would let you play it yourself!! (he still hadn’t played it) and it was also the first time you played genshin live!! you’d show people the characters you have and everything and tell them some anecdotes

people would be SHOCKED because you!? don’t have the character you voiced!? D:

and you’re like “yeah… i pulled for them and used up all my primogems and… didn’t get them”

and your banner is back because of the event, so scaramouche won’t let this slide!!!!!!!!!! YOU WILL GET YOUR CHARACTER.

your luck is terrible compared to his so at one point you’ll literally feel bad for how much he’s spending for you to get it

but he doesn’t mind at all and everyone is having fun so!!

and once you finally get them you’re sO HAPPY and everyone in the chat is celebrating

and you think it’s over but scaramouche is like ???? what are you doing?? open the wish page again. you’re going to get them c6.

and you’re like oh my gOD PLEASE NO DON’T SPEND MORE MONEY ON ME FOR THIS

but he won’t listen and he’ll do it

so!!! he’ll always do his best to be the best boyfriend he can be for you!! so you better give him your heart!!!!

#genshin #genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #scaramouche #scaramouche x reader #genshin impact scenarios #genshin impact imagines #genshim impact headcanons #genshin impact fluff #genshin impact scaramouche #scaramouche scenarios #scaramouche headcanons

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cakeemoji · 4 years ago

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very random headcanons where the obey me! characters are my chemical romance fans / stans

this is what happens when your past fandom and current fandom collides (sorry not sorry)

lucifer

knows about them because satan switched out his classical records for an MCR one

he doesn’t like them much

if he got into them, he might have a mikey bias (it's the whole 'i have to put up with my brother's shit' kind of thing)

he would be more of a casual fan - he can understand why his brothers and MC like my chem but they’re just not his kind of music

even so, i feel like he would be able to recognize which era a certain pic is from based on the members’ hair

he doesn't care about the lore or the band members' lives, like he really doesn't need to know who french-kissed who to piss off homophobic jocks on stage in 2007

mammon

his fav album would have to be danger days and he listened to some of the other well-known songs

his fav song would be "vampire money" because it has the word money in it and because it goes so hard ?>??!!

no, he doesn't know that the song has to do with the band turning down an offer to make a song for a twillight movie (not yet at least)

he also likes "na na na", not because of the "take the cash and i'll keep it" line but also since he likes the energy the song has !!

he’s a danger days enthusiast and defends the album + songs (no sing slander in this household!) because it’s his fav

he’s a fun ghoul kinnie

if he took the time to get into the members, he would be caught in between frank or gerard's lane (it has to do with their stage presence)

leviathan

tbh my chem isn't his kind of music

BUT he listened to "i'm not okay (i promise)", "welcome to the black parade" and "teenagers" and thought they weren't that bad for a group of normies

okay so maybe he got into them. that's fine.

he adores the danger days cinematic universe (he kins party poison) and has his own killjoy persona :]

watches the live performance & turns into a totally different person whenever mama is played

ironically makes those "yeemo" jokes because they're hilariously stupid and for the lolz (g-note jokes, uses those weird nicknames, etc.)

“ROFL pickle gerard???? peak humour LMAO” “levi please shut up”

he doesn't have a bias but he's grown fond of gerard's work (music or art/comic work, either or)

owns the funko figures and those hot topic collectables

he shops at hot topic with belphie

satan

his favourite albums have to be i brought you my bullets... and three cheers !!

his fav songs are "demolition lovers" and "i never told you what i did for a living"

mainly because he likes the concept of the two lovers and thinks the tale is quite tragic

loves looking into the lyrics and reading between the lines ('oh, how wrong we were to think that immortality meant never dying' and ‘juliet loves the beat & the lust it commands / drop the dagger & lather the blood on your hands romeo’ are his favs lines)

he switches out lucifer’s classical records with MCR ones to piss him off

cried to the g-note before

mikey stan. he's a mikey stan.

tbh he’d stan pete wentz and ryan ross too

he's read unholyverse and thinks it's a work of art

he’s an ft. willz theorist.

tbh you could ask him about any mcr theory and he’ll give you all the details. the scrapped paper kingdom album? it’s beautiful. the smashing pumpkins theory?? yes, that’s absolutely canon we predicted mcr’s return

asmodeus

only knows about MCR because a certain someone was blasting danger days and asmo fell head over heels in love with "destroya" after hearing the moans in the song

in fact, whenever someone plays destroya, he moans along to when gerard & frank do in the song just to piss everyone off

destroya is now banned from being played in the HoL

but it's okay, he still has F.T.W.W.W. and its "c'mon, c'mon, kiss my battery / c'mon, c'mon, i'll be your android girl"

"gerard way gender envy ♡"

bought the hipdot x MCR make-up palette

has done album-inspired looks, i just know it.

has probably seen that one "gerard way many moans and groans" video

he came across a frerard kiss compilation and became infested in gerard/frank's relationship

may or may not be a frerardie / gerbertie

hell he might as well be a petekey truther too

“okay but listen to me, you do not just make out with your friends on stage in front of your fans! [...] huh, maybe i should start doing that.”

beelzebub

he saw the music video to "the ghost for you" and teared up because seeing mikey die reminded him of the celestial war and :(

ray toro stan!!! also listens to his solo work and loves after the laughter

"sing" or "save yourself, i'll hold them back" has to be his favourite songs

he watched "life on the murder scene" and laughed at when ray stuck his hand in the cupcake (though it was a total waste of good food <//3)

but seeing the band in the documentary on stage and having fun reminded him of his brothers & all the time they spend :D

ALSO he would definitely practice his drumming skills to their songs

and maybe blast them during his workout sessions

belphegor

“satan i found a new song that lucifer would despise. [plays teenagers]”

he likes them and thinks they're neat (MCR rocks his socks!)

tbh his music taste is a mess

he definitely rocked out to the black parade when he was in the attic ("dead!" was dedicated to lucifer <3)

“sleep” is one of his fav songs (take a guess why)

"famous last words" is his favourite music video

also cried to the g-note a couple of times

absolutely loses his shit whenever “welcome to the black parade” come on - i mean, who doesn’t??

he owns merch - specifically the shirts you can get at your local hot topic

he definitely likes the used as well and his fav album from them would have to be lies for the liars

majority of MCR’s songs are the anti-lucifer league’s anthems

simeon & luke

luke only knows about mcr because simeon played that one yo gabba gabba episode that mcr was featured on because MC said it would help them learn more about the human worlds culture / children’s programs and stuff

therefore "every snowflake is different (just like you)" is luke's favourite MCR song

he cried once he found out they broke up after discovering who they actually were 3 hours later

this was also the start of luke’s rebellious phase

it was not a good three weeks for simeon, or for anyone, honestly

solomon

he’s okay with them - they’re just not his thing?

he would be neutral on whether he likes them or not

BUT he adores the band’s aesthetic

and he's grown a strong love-hate relationship with "destroya"

"asmo, destroya is not just a 'funny haha moaning song'. it's a fight song about being pitted against all odds and finding the lack of faith in yourself, watching everything turn yourself into your own enemy.” “what’s that solomon? sorry i can’t hear you over the sound of gerard’s moans ah ah ah ah~”

he enjoys watching their music videos tho (there's something about the MV for helena that makes it so compelling)

barbatos

he's like the no. 1 mcr stan

asked for a day off once march 22nd came around (as a joke)

lord diavolo asked why, barbatos gave his reasoning and he got that day off.

his favourite album is bullets because gerard's funky screams manage to send chills down his spine

like the part where he goes "just because my hands around your THROAT-" yeah. man, i love that part.

just like satan, he enjoys analyzing the lyrics and looking for deeper meanings :]

this might be ooc but i can't help but think that he'd try to search for a timeline where mcr didn't break up in 2013

diavolo

he overheard MC listening to one of MCR’s songs

he doesn't know much but he knows what good music is when he hears it!

“lucifer, i think it’s time for a study of human world music traditions!” “where is this coming from”

“welcome to the black parade” is his favourite song !!!! like the lyricism?? the transitions??? honestly gerard’s vocals and - wow - everything about it.. he gets why barbatos & the others like them so much

march 22nd was close to becoming a national holiday /j

upon hearing MCR's return, he tried to get reunion tickets for barbatos (and for MC + the brothers too!)

he succeeded <3

yeah they were at the LA return show i just know it

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batarangsoundsdumb · 4 years ago

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yet another ask dump yeehaw!

do you ever think that jay's mother was one of those bitch who believes in horoscope and tarots and things like that and so he believes in these things too, or it is just me projecting?

sheila haywood took one look at jason's birthchart said 'nah this won't do' and left.

Wait, but what happens when the justice league does find out that Bruce and John fucked? Lmao it sounds like it would be hilarious, really, I don’t want a justice league that doesn’t make fun of Bruce for like his entire life.

barry runs out of the meeting immediately and comes back with an entire sti testing kit. diana fully seriously wants bruce to get tested while bruce is sitting there like 'come on guys, you're being ridiculous, i already checked twice'

john is standing in the corner clearly offended while bruce is just like 'don't even say anything, constantine, you fucked a shark'

tim was like "i'm drake now" and everyone was like ahh so your fursona is a dragon and tim was like pffffft no. ducks.

on the one hand, good for him, on the other hand, bro, how do you still have a secret identity when your superhero name is just your last name,,,,

Your fic on ao3 was GOLD PLEASE CONTINUE I loved Dinah's cameo btw ( @purple-vixen

thanks so much! i already continued but this ask is like 10 years old because i'm a notorious procrastinator (also yes! i love dinah so much aahhhhhhhhhhhh)

I've FINALLY been watching the Batman animated series and I gotta say, after watching "the gray ghost" I am CONVINCED that Batman is a closeted super hero geek who was 100% freaking out the first time he met Superman and is just REALLY good at hiding it.

bruce internally: holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit bruce externally: get out of my city, alien

AHHH ur multimedia fic is the only thing that brings me happiness anymore continue it forever pls

uhh thanks, but can't continue it forever because my attention span is that of a toddler on crack on a good day and i can't function without at least 10 things going on at the same time and music in the background

Oi, so I'm getting into dc and watching batman the animated series, and they use fruitcake a lot. Which I thought was very funny and wanted to share w you - Denilla

wait like fruitcake (food) or fruitcake (derogatory) ?

young justice 🤝 teen titans slut shaming batman

tim drake and dick grayson to their respective teams 'you guys stop it, that's my dad'

Happyhoganon: If an eighty year old Batman had fought crime in Gotham City for decades and the only threats to him and the city lately are a wheel chair bounded Penguin, your usual purse snatchers and a few con artists popping up every now and then, how well could the Dark Knight do in maintaining the peace in Gotham despite him being just somewhat fit to do that as an elderly man (which says A LOT given how old he is)

uhh he'll probably do what my grandpa does and that is ruthlessly prank them until they die of shame.

in the death in the family interactive movie there's an ending where Jason is tasked with raising Damian and he decides he's gonna raise Damian to take down the waynes and al ghuls which uh maybe isn't great BUT the idea of Jason raising Damian... PRICELESS. CHAOTIC. I just need more people to know about this :)

yes i saw that wow holy shit but jason would accidentally drop damian on his head one (1) hour in and jason just yeets him into the lazarus pit.

Headcanon: The Penguin has a really hard time fighting any of the Robins because of his avian obsession means there's always a small part of his mind that's like "Birb. Child. Protect" ( @subspacecadet )

as soon as dick becomes nightwing the penguin is like 'you know what, fuck this dude' and shoots at him.

Y'all talking about King Shark dating Constantine, let's not forget about John literally hooking up with Satan

listen there's a clear difference between monsterfucker and satanfucker in that king shark is literally a shark and satan still looks like a normal dude

Does everyone in Gotham think Batman is a teen dad?

everyone in gotham thinks batman has been around since gotham was founded, but they do think that bruce wayne is actually a teen father and dick grayson's biological dad.

why. why would you do that fancast when you know it will only hurt people

what? i loved my fancast it was really well done. i did it with good representation in mind and i really managed that with alfred pennyworth being ✨italian✨

Seeing james charles a jason gave me psychic damage how dare you i need to wash my eyes

well that's a you problem isn't it?

do you think dick grayson thirst tweets about nightwing just to annoy his family/cause problems on purpose in general?

he thinks nightwing is hot, next question.

holy jiminy cricket batman, its as cold as the good lords ass crack in here!!

i- what? this is why i don't fuck with english expressions it's way too goddamn weird

Brooooooo, your teen dad!Bruce au is soooo good. I've got brainrot.

Honestly if you ever write anymore, I'd read that shit twice. Sign me the fuck up. Good stuff, Good Stuff.

uh yeah i'm thinking about writing a fic, but i have exams coming up and i don't wanna fail because that would suck. but after i'll certainly be writing more tho

your teen dad AU is so great! bruce acting like a big brother for all of like a week before he's telling everyone about his son. what if in the AU dick meets the JL because they need to rescue him? maybe he's in trouble/kidnapped at a gala and bruce starts calling for JL. clark finds him and has to fly with dick to bring him home - that's how dick and clark meet and superman becomes dick's fave hero. he goes around the manor thinking he can fly with a red blanket draped around him like a cape.

actually- if you want a young dad! bruce fic with like that kinda stuff(just with damian) go check uhh- in for a penny by cdelphiki. it's really good and bruce is like 24/25-ish. (and dick's there!!!)

This account has solely convinced me that Tim is a trash goblin ( @hamilcat-and-magic-turtle )

because he is. that boy has slept in dumpsters on multiple occasions even if he is the son of a billionaire.

Okay but when you said victory dance I did think of the whole justice league defeating the big bad and then they all start flossing

well that's exactly what hal jordan does and that's why batman uses a gun now. no but the victory dance in my opinion is like the 'we're all in this together' dance from high school musical.

The horrors in Invincible s1 was nothing compared to the comics, I cant wait for s2

oh well okay, i mean i personally react to horror and violence by laughing awkwardly so i can't wait to be called a monster for accidentally laughing at a mass murder.

I'm currently watching Batman: The Brave and The Bold and- Bruce is just talking about Oliver like he's an old love (@nightwings-kid)

okay im going to watch that lmao that's totally and completely in character for him tho.

The invincible comic is like super gratuitous with its violence so much so I'm shocked the show was able to adapt it in a faithful way! Anyway had the show been live action it absolutely wouldn't have the same impact as it does as an animated show and I'm so glad so many people agree with me on that

also because a live action casting would've been like uhh amanda stenberg for amber, the dude- the guy from the supernatural but with a mustache for omni-man, and scarlet johanssen for debbie grayson

Debbie grayson is a milf, yes. You're welcome for the invincible propoganda, now you can questions your life. Bruce def seems like the perfect father next to Omni-man. Like they really took a rip off justice league and I was like well, now I'm attached even tho I was like hah I know who they're supposed to be. And then bam- death gore death gore gore gore sad Mark grayson just had to have daddy issues. Why does every character have daddy issues. I'm sick of the attacks

because daddy issues make a person arguably funnier, that's why i'm not even remotely funny (haha good dad flex). i liked that it was dark contextually, but not in the colouring, bc i hate when it's like 'uh yeah graphic murder and now a shot so dark you have to sit in a dark room and squint at the screen to faintly see the characters. (like dcau ugh)

About the Wayne insurance, for a moment I thought you would put the video with moans over the waves.

i mean- i could've done that, but rick rolling seemed more family friendly.

Its the first time in forever that im surpise rickrolled, i usually expect it. Congratulations (i really should know better this is tumblr)

i get rickrolled so often but i actually like the song so i dont really give a fuck

Actually, my information about Damian and John's kids is outdated because it was revealed that the old men telling the kids stories about the Supersons were actually Jon and Damian the whole time. I was blinded by my thirst for Grandpa!Bruce Wayne but I was wrong... I liked my version better, tbh (@artemisa97)

fair enough. but i'd honestly like to see damian and jon getting together, just because it's a really fun dynamic and their friendship was really cute when they were kids. (also idk maybe it would be nice to have one (1) main batfam/superfam character that's not cishet)

How am i JUST finding your blog skdskfkd you're so fucking funny and ur takes are hot

i thought u were calling me hot :( but youre not :( crime detected (but lmao thanks)

So I have depression and I swear that your memes are one of the few things that have made me laugh so thank you 💛�� (@katekanebadass)

aw you're welcome, and i hope you're doing okay!

The metropolis memes are so funny, I love them 💀😌

i think metropolis is also so fucking funny it deserves more attention imagine having your entire police force being upstaged by an alien from kansas and his kids

as an american i feel your complete lack of knowledge of us geography is just so sexy (platonic) ❤️

thanks so much (i also don't know any other geography, i'm not kidding, like you can tell me you're from hungary and it will just blank, there will be nothing that comes to mind)

In the DC universe they don't say "Can't have shit in Detroit" they say "Can't have shit in Gotham"

this just reminds me of that guy whose porch got stolen like the steps to his door, and i'm thinking of people living in gotham and waking up without a front door and going "can't have shit in gotham"

honestly all i know about chicago is the bean, so. what would gotham's famous sculpture be?

gigantic gargoyle statue in front of one of the police precincts because a villain thought it was a smart way to keep the police inside, but it's too heavy to move.

why tf do people go on about how batman "works alone" or how he's the "lone wolf" when he like 38290202 members in his family

bc people think it's cool that a grown man in his 30s has no friends or family instead of calling it what it is (sad)

Bruce is gotham's sugar daddy

why would say something so controversial yet so brave.

my favorite batfamily fanfictions are the ones where they use their shitty codenames, unironically, in any context

dick: gerard way are you in position, gerard way are you in position

tim: for the last fucking time, my codename is 'totally not count olaf' this week, abbafan 3000

dick: shut up my codename isn't 'abbafan 3000'

dick: it's 'abbafan number 1' and you know it

I have a feeling Tim drake is ur favourite batfamily member but okay u don't have favs if u say so ok

i mean he is, i won't deny it. but i love each and every one of the batfam just the same, i just have a weak spot for short dumbass nerds, because i'm a short dumbass nerd.

Omg i fuckin love boy meets world too fam shsjkfk

bro boy meets world was the shit!!! it was just fire and awesome and so fucking great like bro. it was so good im not even going to be accepting criticism

you know I find the whole "joker completes batman" thing a bit disgusting considering the horrendous stuff the batfamily went through because of the joker and let's not get started on the "joker has a point" thing like yeah he's this cool complex villain but he's absolutely batshit crazy

like yes! i get what you mean the joker just fucking sucks man he doesn't do shit for batman's character or the batfam he's literally just annoying as fuck. like the joker has a point' shit is so stupid. i will accept 'magneto was right' because he fucking was and i think he didn't do anything wrong, but joker? he's just like that. he's not even cool and complex he's just a weirdo with a bleach kink at this point.

ALSO YOUR RACISM POST- SO TRUE BESTIE

thanks bestie, i'm glad you agree.

in today's essay of why I think cass should become batman- I was thinking Tim would probably be the most efficient batman in many ways but I also think he wouldn't want to be batman tbh none of the batfamily members would want to be batman because they're trying to outgrow him but cass is the one who wants to represent the symbol that is batman

absofuckinglutely i will say it again and again that cass represents the batsymbol more than anyone in the batfam, in batgirl (2000) she literally didn't care about anything else than bruce's oath to not kill, she thought the batsymbol was more important than anything in gotham. she's just an excellent character because her motivation to not kill is not 'i'm scared i can't come back from it' or 'well my dad says no murder so i'll go along with it' but that she's killed somebody as a young child and she never wants to kill a human ever again and that's so fucking beautiful for a new batman like yes.

need more cass, duke and tim inclusion in gothamite memes

yes yes, a tall order of cass, duke and tim coming up in 1-14 business days

oldest to youngest batfam members cus I'm confused as shit

okay order of being taken in: dick, jason, tim, cass, damian, duke order of age: alfred, bruce, dick, cass, jason, tim, duke, damian (though cass and jason are around the same age general consensus is that cass is a little older)

I'm so confused Steph is a redhead?? like how was it that hard to get this right? the source material is literally right there and free

cw is jared, 19

do you receive anon hate? if so, how do you deal with it

uh no, i'm not remotely popular enough to get anon hate and i also don't say a lot of things that would attract anon hate, but i do send anon hate to @the-real-peter-parker because he forgot about the specialists from winx club

Wait how many languages do you speak??

uhh- 5 if you include latin, but that's a dead language and i'm really bad at it. but english, my native language, german, and french also, tho german and french not fluently.

You can mix aguaepanela with aguardiente 😈 and is tasty

okay but now i'm curious if the liquor deserves the 😈 emoji or if that's a you problem. but i googled it and it looks like something you'd take one sip of and then not remember the rest of your evening.

#i love all of you guys so much thanks for all these asks #some of these are literally from march but fuck it #the day tumblr puts dates next to anon messages is the day i close my inbox crawl into a hole and die #it's such a basic task to answer asks but i don't want to bother anyone with asks clogging up their timeline #and if i don't have a funny or good answer i'm like 'uhh okay won't answer it now then'#so this is for you #also i deleted a few asks because it gives me mental pain to see my inbox go over 50 and it's almost at 100 #i was complaining about having too many asks to the-real-peter-parker like months ago and then i had 45 asks in my inbox #now it's amassed to going over 100 twice #but no i love all of you and you're great and you're all fantastic and i lvoe you #muchos kiss kiss #kiss kiss for my kiddies lvoe you #invincible spoilers #dc #dcu #dc comics #ask #anon #bataranswers #i really wanna try aguapanela now i'm gonna see if i can find panela somewhere and review it for you babes #uh yeah that's it #muchos gracias for all your questions babes

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