#talking to a fucking french of all people. THIS ONE french of all people.

[yourfavoritepillowprincess]

downbad!abby who initially ran into you in your campus library. it was a rainy wednesday afternoon, the november chill leaving everyone bundled up in sweaters and beanies galore. her biochem professor cancelled class last minute, and what better way to celebrate than enjoying a cup of hot chocolate and a nice book?

you both happened to have stumbled upon the horror aisle, with you naturally finding your way there shortly after abby. she didn’t acknowledge you at first, so busy reading a blurb from some hardcover that she didn’t want to lose focus. it wasn’t until she heard the light jingle of the beads on the bottom of your braids that she thought to look up to investigate the sound. 

she nearly has a fucking heart attack when she sees you for the very first time. the way the dim lights shone on you, emphasizing your wonderfully brown skin. the way that even with your slouchy crochet sweater and baggy jeans, she could still see the light silhouette of your thighs and the side of your fat ass. the way that your fingers were stacked with rings and your perfectly lined eyeliner and your hair. your fucking hair. everything about you was a piece of art, and for a hot second, she was convinced that this was some hyper surreal fever dream. you couldn't possibly be real....right?

she only allowed herself a few seconds to be starstruck before snapping tf out of it and striking up a conversation. as entranced as she was, your campus was unfortunately quite large, and if it took this long into the school year for her to find you, who tf knows when she’ll see you again?

she was a mess, but a charming one, a confident one. and that intrigued you like nothing else. in fact, everything about her intrigued you. her confidence, the fact that she was built like a damn military tank with arms the sizes of cannons, the way her long blonde hair was pulled back into a neat french braid, with a few light strands framing her face in the most beautiful way. she was gorgeous and was talking to you out of all people.

as your eyes raked over her figure, gently smiling to yourself bc you clearly liked what you saw, abby knew that one way or another, tomorrow or 10 years from now, she was going to make you her fucking wife.

this bitch courts you for weeks. good morning texts, endless compliments, study sessions, cute little picnics at the park not too far from the dorms. she’s always one of the first to view your story or like your post, and will leave the cutest comments. you had been going through a relatively rough time lately, but you just seemed so hyper and chirpy that even your friends were wondering wtf was up.

to everyone else yall been together, but lesbians just move at a different pace 😜. your first official “date” ended up being an entire fucking day filled with activities, 100% curated by abby. a trip to a museum you told her you’d been meaning to check out, followed by lunch at this super cute cafe, followed by a pottery class, followed by a picnic/smoke sesh that had you both giggling at absolutely nothing for hours. she has proven again and again that she’s more than willing to go above and beyond for you, and it made your heart swell with so much love that it felt like it was going to burst. so naturally, when she finally popped the question (officially asked you to be her gf), you couldn't say yes fast enough. literally. you didn’t even let her finish her sentence.

and that's exactly how you got here, pinned underneath abby on her bed.

"you have no idea how long i’ve been waiting for this. knew from the first day i saw you that i was gonna make you crave this dick. took all my strength not to take you in that damn library bunny". 

she fucked you with a ferocity that under different circumstances would’ve scared you, your knees next to your ears as you watched her fat dick slide out of you repeatedly. it was heavy, filling your cunt to the brim as it struggled to accommodate her length, the light imprint of her hard work showing via a little bump under your belly button.

it took almost 2 hours of foreplay and a lot of lube, but she was eventually able to work all 9 inches into you, and it was making your head fucking spin.

“how do you feel mama? feel full, hmm? am i hitting that spot right?” you would’ve answered her, if your brain and ears were cooperating at the same time. her words oozed through one ear and out of the other, her voice syrupy and so so sweet. the room smelled like nothing but sex, the sound of skin slapping against each other and your desperate cries the only sounds to be heard. outside of the dirty talk, not a peep came from abby, she was so focused on being in your tummy that she borderline forgot how to moan :(

“i-i”. even speaking proved to be a struggle. your nails were digging bloody crescents into her wide shoulders, looking an absolute mess. rivers of salty tears were streaming down your cheeks, snot building as drool leaked from your open mouth. it was embarrassing, honestly. humiliating even. but abby was looking down at you with nothing but pride and adoration in her eyes. to her, you looked just as beautiful as ever, well loved, well fucked. what else can a simple gal like her ask for?

“you-you.” she mocked, slowing her thrusts and allowing you a brief second to collect your thoughts. “what do you wanna say baby? tell abby alllll about it, yeah?” she wiped some of the tears that continued to seep out of your eyes and pushed the few miscellaneous braids that found their way in front of you back behind your head, those damn beads still jingling.

“i think i love you.”

and with that, abby’s face lit up like a kid on christmas day. “yeah? you think you love me?” she wrapped your legs around her waist and slightly hitched you up, returning to her original pace of impaling you on her strap. “well i think i love you” she bumped her nose against yours, bringing your lips into a kiss so deep that it pushed you even further into that blissful subspace.

“now show me how much this pussy loves me, and cum”.

[davekat-sucks]

Not sure if you heard it or not, but it seems one of composers started go nuts because of Asmongold coverage of art controversy, calling him... anti-gay?

Pardon my French, but how the fuck you make this connection? The guy just covered some unfortunate toxicity of art communities. He is not anti gay.

I know what you are talking about. It's the Anya from Mouthwashing game fanart. I had been following that shit on Twitter/X. The reason they are calling Asmongold anit-gay because the developer of Mouthwashing, Martin, accuses him of that when Asmongold was only talking about the harassment the artist was receiving over a fictional character in a game that has very dark themes. It's in deep contrast to another developer that worked with him on this game, Wrong_Organ, who defended the artist and called out on the people that harassed them. So should we buy the game to spite the people that harassed the artist? Or not because one of the developers accused a different person covering this because of a different political topic? It's all a fucking mess.

[anxiouslowercase]

sas rh: let eoin survive the fall au » the astronomer philosopher, the earth and the moon

[pyrosomatic-metamorphosis]

i know too fucking much about qsmp badboyhalo.

[bloody-wonder]

assuming you've read tsc, what are ur thoughts?

mixed feelings, anon!

on the one hand, tsc is just another confirmation that nora is a talented writer - i think the dialogue especially is where she really excels. the reading experience was overall very fun, i did enjoy seeing my faves again. neil is an icon, obviously. the culture clash between jean and the trojans was Comedy Gold. and it was interesting to see an exploration of a different trauma response than we've seen in aftg in jean.

on the other hand, i feel like jean's story in tsc mirrors neil's story in aftg - a troubled youth joins an exy team where he will make new friends and get better mentally - but is like. a simplified and less compelling version of that. it's good that jean is his own character, i don't need him to be a copy of neil, but i gotta say - neil's cameo appearances totally stole the show and made me wonder why i wasn't reading a book about him instead. however, it's all the other characters who were the real problem - it felt like i'm reading a version of aftg where a less fun iteration of neil joins an exy team consisting just of the upperclassmen and nicky hemmick which uhhh,, if you've read some of my old posts you know how i feel about him so there was no chance in hell i'd like cat alvarez and her whole shtick. the foxes felt good for the soul bc there was a balance between the upperclassmen's and the monsters' type of care for neil - and crucially neil chose the latter group to be his close circle, among other things, bc he felt they could understand him better. by constrast, jean is alone with the trojans who don't give any credibility to his claims that they just can't understand what he went through, don't respect his right to keep his trauma private and just keep trying to force his "recovery". aftg felt like a bunch of freaks with various but equally fascinating issues put in close quarters and you watch them sometimes butt heads, sometimes uplift each other in the most unexpected ways. tsc however felt like a bunch of normies bullying a traumatized kid - so basically one of those obnoxious fics where the upperclassmen are all in neil and andrew's business.

jean's bisexuality was a double-edged sword too: on the one hand, i felt very smug reading about how his attraction works bc 1) it's so obviously different from neil and 2) wow turns out years of psychological, physical and sexual abuse do not in fact take away your sexuality! le gasp! surprised fucking pikachu!! crazy how through all of this jean is still bi. the human spirit is unbreakable. (unless your mom hits you for kissing a girl, then it's breakable). so i did feel vindicated but at the same time this was not relatable to the point that i can't see myself getting invested in jean and jeremy's developing relationship. nothing is more of a turn off for me in fictional romances than when both of them are immediately attracted to each other and let the reader know in no uncertain terms. where are the mind games? where are the intricate rituals? it feels like a lazy shortcut. but good for them, i guess?

sooo idk. i didn't hate tsc by any means but i'm sad i didn't enjoy it as much as my mutuals😭

[comradecowplant]

so things are not going well with my new elderly socdem friend unfortunately.

[laughinglynx]

.

[hamletisintown]

I'm so fucking annoyed at the number of english-speaking hoyoverse players who play with the japanese subtitles

I'm only speaking about like, streamers and youtubers because those are the ones i see playing, obviously (and i'm only talking about genshin impact and honkai star rail bc those are the 2 hoyo games i play but i'm willing to bet the trend is the same in other hoyo games, and possibly in other chinese "anime" games)

The number of times i click on a video and the person speaks english but has their game set to japanese dubbing for no reason, like. Can you guys stop being weebs for just one second please.

[coquelicoq]

"each thing I learn about you just makes me want to know you more" <-text from my neighbor just now. i don't know what i'm winning at, but i'm definitely winning at something.

[barbie-nightmare-house]

watching the new dune took up too much storage now I’m getting pop ups telling me to delete that shit from my hard drive

[themthistles]

tumblr claims to love found family, queer subtext and old man yaoi and yet i've never seen these three on my dash

[outlying-hyppocrate]

ever since i was a child i have been obsessed with names and ever since i was a child i have always found more beauty in others' than my own

[ineskew]

somehow this post has passed the notes threshold where people start reading into it things i didn't say, so:

it's not that indie & international films are always good! it's that even when an indie movie is bad it's often bad in an interesting way, or at least you can see the heart that went into making it; it has a perspective. even when an international film is bad it's usually bad in a way i'm not used to, or at least it's a window into another culture and part of the world i haven't seen. i've seen some awful movies of both kinds this year but in every case i left the theater with something to think about

anyway stream how to make millions before grandma dies (2024)

no one warns you of this but the more indie & international films you watch the worse american blockbusters look in comparison. be safe out there

[allinllachuteruteru]

Duolingo is NOT what it used to be.

“Duolingo is ‘sunsetting the development of the Welsh course’ (and many others)”.

I’ve used Duolingo since 2013. It used to be about genuinely learning languages and preserving endangered ones. It used to have a vibrant community and forum where users were listened to. It used to have volunteers that dedicated countless hours and even years to making the best courses they could while also trying to explain extremely nuanced and complex grammar in simple terms.

In the past two years it feels like Von Ahn let the money talk instead of focusing on the original goal.

No one truly had a humongous problem with the subscription tier for SuperDuolingo. We understood it: if you can afford to pay, help keep Duolingo free for those who couldn’t.

It started when the company went public. Volunteers were leaving courses they created because they warned of differing longterm goals compared to Duolingo’s as a company; not long after it was announced that the incubator (how volunteers were able to make courses in the first place) would be shut down. A year goes by and the forums—the voice of the users and the way people were able to share tips and explanations—is discontinued. A year or two later, Duolingo gets a completely new makeover—the Tree is gone and you don’t control what lesson you start with. With the disappearance of the Tree, all grammar notes and explanations for courses not in the Big 8 (consisting of the courses made before the incubator like Spanish/French/German/etc. and of the most popular courses like Japanese/Korean/Chinese/etc.) are removed with it. Were you learning Vietnamese and have no idea how honorifics work without the grammar notes? Shit outta luck bud. Were you learning Polish and have absolutely no clue how one of the declensions newly thrown at you functions? Suck it up. In a Reddit AMA, Von Ahn claims that the new design resulted in more users utilizing the app/site. How he claims that statistic? By counting how many people log into their Duolingo account, as if an entire app renovation wouldn’t cause an uptick in numbers to even see what the fuck just happened to the courses.

Von Ahn announces next in a Reddit AMA that no more language courses will be added from what there already is available. His reasoning? No one uses the unpopular language courses — along with how Duolingo will now be doing upkeep with the courses already in place. And here I am, currently looking on the Duolingo website how there are 1.8 million active learners for Irish, 284 thousand active learners for Navajo, and even 934 thousand active learners for fucking High Valyrian. But yea, no one uses them. Not like the entire Navajo Nation population is 399k members or anything, or like 1.8 million people isn’t 36% of the entire population of Ireland or anything.

And now this. What happened to the upkeep of current courses? Oh, Von Ahn only meant the popular ones that already have infinite resources. Got it. Duolingo used to be a serious foundational resource for languages with little resources while also adding the relief of gamification.

It pisses me off. It really does. This was not what Duolingo started out as. And yea, maybe I shouldn’t get invested in a dingy little app. But as someone who spent most of her adolescence immersed in language learning to the point where it was literally keeping me alive at one point, to the point where languages felt like my only friend as a tween, and to the point where friendships on the Duolingo forums with likeminded individuals my age and other enthusiasts who even sent me books in other languages for free because they wanted people to learn it, the evolution of Duolingo hits a bitter nerve within me.

~End rant.

[sophiejacksonchase]

Percy: so let me just get this clear, Leo speaks three languages, he's super tech savvy, and he's in AP math classes.

Leo: pretty much, yeah.

Percy: and Solace over here is like number one professional doctor with years of training and actual practice.

Will: I'm kinda cheating with the magic, but I read the books to make sure.

Percy: meanwhile Reyna, Jason, Hazel and Frank were/are a teenage war general. That must had required something.

Reyna, jason, Hazel and Frank: way too much leadership skills.

Percy: Calipso can make clothes from scratch, and how to grow her own food.

Calipso: I do.

Percy: Nico knows like six languages. And had years of playing video games.

Nico: I know Italian, Latin, Greek, English, and a little bit of French, so like, four and a half.

Percy: Annabeth gained architectural experience when she designed the fucking Olympus.

Annabeth: that was awesome.

Percy: Piper have a famous father, and she speaks French.

Piper: I don't like to talk about it.

Percy: all of you people are actually useful in the mortal world. I am wanted for arson.

[coryndoll]

hi can you make a one shot about meankook!reader bullying sofia for being a pogue just because sofia is dating rafe? and rafe confronting meankook!reader but all the reader did was to cry because she's still not over rafe (rafe and the reader had a past 😞💨)

french 75

rafe cameron x meankook!reader

warning: ruthie i fear .

authors note: hi so idk if u wanted them to get together, AND I LOVE SOFIAS CHARACTER but we’re using the “theyre not even really official and sofias so nice that she’ll probably just let this pass if rafe was still in love with his ex” excuse 😭

you've been feeling out of place lately. it's not like you haven't tried to move on, but it’s hard when the people you used to spend every day with are still around, circling like ghosts of a life you’re no longer part of.

you and rafe broke things off six months ago, and since then, everything’s been awkward. you still hang out with sarah, mostly because she doesn’t make things weird. topper and kelce are around too, and sometimes topper’s new girlfriend ruthie tags along. but there’s this unspoken tension whenever you’re all together—like they’re waiting for you to crack, or maybe you’re waiting for it.

the hardest part isn’t the breakup itself. you’re used to that; breakups are part of life. no, the hardest part is seeing rafe with sofia.

you heard about her weeks ago, whispers on the island, but it wasn’t real until you saw them together. inseparable. she’s always there now, tucked into his side like she belongs there, like that used to be you. and no matter how much time passes, seeing your ex with someone else just . . . stings. like you’re stuck, still standing where you were when things ended, while rafe's already miles ahead, moving on with his life.

you haven’t even thought about getting with anyone new lately, and apparently, that’s concerning to ruthie. you’re sitting at the country club bar, arms stretched out across the table and your forehead pressed to the surface.

it’s a slow afternoon, topper and kelce are leaning against the railing a few feet away, deep in conversation. ruthie’s beside you, eyeing you with this weird mix of disgust and amusement, like you're some kind of charity case she’s fascinated by.

“seriously? you haven't hooked up with anyone in the last month?” ruthie asks, her voice dripping with disbelief.

you can feel her staring at you, judging you, and you groan, burying your face in the table as if that might make her stop.

“two months?” she presses, raising an eyebrow.

“four,” you murmur, still not lifting your head. you can practically feel her eyes widen.

“god,” ruthie mutters under her breath, like you’re some tragic, pitiful thing. she leans back in her chair, crossing her arms and making a face like she’s disgusted by the mere thought of it. you finally sit up, tired eyes meeting hers with a sharp look.

“okay, can you just drop it, ruthie?” you snap, though it comes out louder than you wanted it to. you rub your temples, feeling the headache creeping in. “i’m getting a fucking migraine talking to you.”

ruthie blinks, like she’s taken aback, before her eyes narrow and her lips press into a thin line. she throws her hands up, palms facing you in a mock surrender. “whatever,” she mutters, scoffing as she stands. she’s muttering something under her breath before she struts off toward topper and kelce, leaving you alone at the table.

eventually, topper catches your eye from where he’s standing, mid-conversation. he doesn’t say anything, just watches you for a moment before leaving them behind and walking over to where you’re still slumped in your chair.

there’s a quiet, unspoken kindness in the way he looks at you, a soft spot he’s always had for you, even if he doesn’t always say it outright.

“did ruthie piss you off?” he asks, voice low and casual as he leans on the back of your chair.

you make a face. “she’s just annoying,” you mutter, sitting up straighter in your chair. “i don’t get why everyone still cares. it’s been weeks since rafe and sofia started whatever they’re doing, and months since we broke up. i just want people to shut up about it already.”

topper presses his lips together, looking down but still watching you with a sideways glance, that familiar expression that says ‘are you done yet?’ he doesn’t even have to say anything.

you stare at him for a moment, realizing just how much of a buzzkill you’ve been today. not that ruthie doesn’t deserve it—she’s always been the annoying one, poking at you like you’re some project she’s trying to fix. but still . . . maybe you went too far. your eyes flick over to her standing with kelce, hands on her hips, still talking animatedly like nothing happened.

apologize? you think for a second but dismiss it. no, she’ll live.

“you want a drink?” topper asks, pulling you out of your thoughts. “on me.”

you look up at him and just nod, too drained to argue or offer any witty remarks. topper gives a small nod back, tilting his head toward the bar in a way that tells you to ‘come on.’

you push yourself up from the table, rubbing the back of your head. “thanks,” you murmur as you follow him to the bar.

you approach the counter, scanning the drink options in your head even though you know what you want already. “a french 75?” you say almost immediately.

topper’s already placing cash on the counter, giving you a nod before turning and heading back to the others. you watch him walk off, then turn back to face the bartender, but the guy is sliding topper’s money over to himself and calling over his shoulder for someone else to handle your drink, like he’s too busy.

you wait, your eyes drifting across the room, taking in the familiar faces. your friends are just off to the side, still talking, but when you face forward again, you see someone else working on your drink. a girl, back turned to you, quickly mixing things with slightly impressive speed. you tap your fingers against the counter, trying to fill the silence while you wait.

it doesn’t take long. quicker than you expected, the girl is already turning around, glass in hand. “french 75,” she says, placing the drink on the counter—until her eyes meet yours, and her expression freezes. the glass hovers in her hand for a moment as if she’s debating whether to set it down or not. her face pales, and you realize why.

sofia.

your jaw clenches instinctively, and you just stare at her. her presence alone irritates you, but seeing her behind the bar, handing you a drink, like this is normal, like everything is fine? it’s suffocating.

kelce is the first to realize what’s going on. “oh, shit,” you hear him mutter, raising a fist to his mouth in a mix of surprise and awkward amusement. he taps topper on the shoulder to get his attention, and soon enough, topper and ruthie are glancing over, realizing who he’s staring at. they shuffle over to a nearby table, clearly coming closer to stand by you, or maybe just to watch the drama unfold.

you don’t break eye contact with sofia, letting your gaze slowly trail down, taking her in from head to toe with a grimace, like you’re trying to figure out how someone like her even fits into your world, let alone into rafe’s life. sofia purses her lips, setting the glass on the counter with a sharp clink, avoiding your gaze now.

without a word, you grab the glass and turn on your heel, walking over to where your friends have settled at the new table. they’re all looking at you, like they’ve already seen everything that happened and are just waiting for your reaction.

you sit down with a huff, glancing at them with a raised eyebrow. “why are we sitting here?” you ask, your voice low and laced with annoyance. it’s too close—too close to the front counter, too close to her.

ruthie just shrugs, but she’s looking past you at the bar with a little too much interest. you roll your eyes and take a sip of your drink, trying to ignore the knot twisting tighter in your chest.

ruthie leans forward, her arms crossed on the table, a glint of mischief in her eyes as she glances between you and the bar. you can almost see the gears turning in her head. “so, what’s it like,” she asks, lowering her voice conspiratorially, “watching your ex play house with someone so . . . beneath him?”

you sit there, caught off guard for a moment. topper’s eyes widen slightly, and he shoots ruthie a look, clearly knowing she’s trying to stir the pot.

the truth is, you hate how rafe looks with sofia. it’s not like you can admit that out loud, but now, with ruthie pushing you, it feels like the perfect opportunity to let it out. you don’t even know what comes over you.

you take a deep breath, your leg bouncing under the table, a small smile creeping onto your lips as you respond, “i’ll just say, she can play house all she wants. it’s not like she’s getting a permanent role.”

you notice topper staring at you, disbelief etched across his face. you say it so low and calculated, causing ruthie and kelce to snicker.

“he’s just keeping her around because she’s easy, she’s a pogue,” you continue. “no effort, no expectations. it’s not like she has anything to offer except, what, pouring drinks? fuckin’ classy.”

ruthie jumps in, her voice light but laced with sarcasm, “i almost feel bad for her. almost. but she’ll figure it out when he’s done playing.” she leans back, a mocking expression plastered on her face. “imagine being the girl who bartends at her boyfriend’s parties . . . awkward.”

it’s toxic, sure, but right now, it’s all you’ve got. the laughter and banter dull the sting of seeing rafe with sofia, if only for a little while. you lean back in your chair, your smirk lingering as you watch the laughter between your friends, even if a part of you knows it won’t last.

“hey,” you hear someone murmur behind you, and your stomach drops.

just from that, you know that it’s unmistakably rafe’s voice, smooth and casual, but with an edge that sends a shiver down your spine. you whip around in your chair, dread pooling in your gut as you see him standing there, a bag in his hands—most likely sofia’s. he must’ve walked up from downstairs, just in time to catch the tail end of your conversation.

rafe’s gaze is locked onto sofia. the way they look at each other that makes your blood boil. you literally feel like flipping tables right now.

behind you, ruthie’s laughter cuts through the tension, but you can hear topper nudging her to shut up.

you face forward and close your mouth, focusing on tracing the bottom of your glass, pretending to be absorbed in your drink as the conversation flows at the table, about other things.

a few moments pass, and you hear footsteps approaching from behind. curiosity pulls you in, and you tilt your head just enough to catch a glimpse of rafe as he approaches.

his hand barely brushes your shoulder. you instinctively glance over your shoulder, ready to tell him to back off, but the look in his eyes is different. “can i talk to you?” he asks.

anxiety twists in your stomach, but you mask it, meeting his gaze. you give ruthie a quick look—a silent plea for backup or perhaps a warning—but you know she’s not going to say anything. she’s too wrapped up in her own amusement, still chuckling at the earlier jab about sofia.

before you join him, you tilt your head back and quickly down the rest of your drink, earning a snort from kelce. you stand up, heart pounding in your chest as you face rafe. he stands tall. behind him, you catch sofia’s eyes again. she’s watching you, and you can see the faint flicker of concern in her expression. it’s irritating and satisfying all at once.

“let’s go,” rafe says, his voice low, and he turns to walk away, prompting you to follow him. you take a deep breath, stealing one last glance at your friends, who exchange looks before you slip out of their sight.

he leads you downstairs and out of the building. the chatter and laughter from the downstairs restaurant fade behind you. you can feel rafe’s anger practically radiating off him.

he spins around to face you, eyes blazing. “what the hell was that all about?” his voice is low but intense. “is this the new game you’re playing? you think talking shit about sofia is going to make you look good?”

the offense courses through you like a wave, your jaw clenching at his accusation. “you’re kidding, right?” you shoot back. “you’re the one who moved on like it was nothing. do you really expect me to sit here and pretend it’s fine? to just be okay with you and your new girlfriend flaunting it in everyone’s face?”

rafe’s eyes narrow, his frustration deepening. “look, i get that you’re feeling some type of way, but doing that with our friends of all people isn’t going to change anything between us.”

you furrow your eyebrows. “i don’t know what you want me to say. you want me to be happy for you? it’s not that simple,” you retort. “it’s a joke that you think i’m going to sit here and pretend i’m okay with everything while you’re acting like you didn’t just move on in record time.”

his expression hardens, and you can see the muscles in his jaw flex as he fights for control. “you don’t get it, do you?” he says, stepping closer. “this isn’t about you. it’s about sofia and me. if you really cared, you’d respect that.”

“respect?” you scoff. “you want respect after everything? you think just because you’re with her, everything should be okay? you’re so self-absorbed that you can’t even see how messed up this is for me.”

rafe shakes his head, “and you think this is easy for me? watching you act like a child while i’m trying to move on? it’s not just about you anymore, y/n. you’re not the only one who’s hurting.”

his words hit harder than you expect, a punch to the gut that leaves you momentarily speechless. you take a breath, trying to compose yourself. “then why don’t you act like it? you’re so busy playing house with sofia that you don’t even care how it looks from my side. it’s like you don’t give a damn about what we had.”

“what we had is over!” rafe snaps, and you take a small step back. “you need to let it go. it’s not my fault you can’t handle seeing me with someone else. you’re the one making this harder than it needs to be.”

he takes a step back this time, and you can see the hurt lingering just below the surface. his voice cuts through the air, “you have no business being in this. sofia isn’t even my girlfriend, and it’s been six months. you need to let go of whatever this is.”

“so what? just because you say it’s over, i’m supposed to be fine? you moved on so fast, rafe. how can you just act like it’s nothing?”

he rolls his eyes. “you’re the one making this a problem. i saw you with that guy a few months back. so don’t act like you’re sitting here heartbroken. you’re clearly over me!”

the breath catches in your throat, anger twisting into something deeper, more painful. “that was the first and last time i was even with anyone since we broke up, rafe! i didn’t want to be with him! i was just trying to get over you, to stop feeling like this.” your voice shakes as you speak, you’re crumbling in front of him.

“then why are you acting like this?” he demands.

you can’t hold it in any longer. “because i’m not over you!” you scream, the words ripping from your throat with a desperation that leaves you breathless. rafe blinks at you in stunned silence, his expression shifting from anger to something softer, almost vulnerable.

your walls finally come crashing down, and you feel the tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. it’s humiliating to admit it all. “i’ve been a bitch because i’m not . . . over you, rafe. and i don’t think i ever have been.” the admission slips from your lips, and you can see the surprise flicker across his face. “and everyone keeps talking to me, asking about you, and then all the stuff about sofia when people started seeing you guys around the island . . . it’s just exhausting! i’m tired, rafe. i’m so tired.”

a tear spills down your cheek. you wipe it away angrily, frustrated with yourself for showing weakness. rafe steps closer, his expression softening, but the distance between you still feels vast.

“you think i don’t care?” he says quietly, the anger draining from his tone. the silence hangs heavy between you, your breaths coming in shaky intervals as he processes your words. “y/n,” he starts, but you can’t hold back any longer.

“it’s just . . . it’s so hard to watch you move on with someone who feels like a shadow of what we had,” you mumble. “every time i see you with sofia, it’s like a knife twisting in my chest. and i know i shouldn’t feel this way. i know i should be happy for you, and i am, but i don’t know how to move on when you’re still so present in my life, even when you’re not really in it. and it makes me feel pathetic. i thought i was strong enough to handle it, but every time i think i’m over you, it just hits me all over again. like i’m right back at square one, and i don’t know how to let go.”

your voice cracks on that last word, and suddenly the dam breaks. you don’t mean to, but everything comes rushing out. “i’m fucking mad at you. i’m mad at myself. i hate that i still care about you. i hate that i can’t even walk into a room without wondering if you’ll be there, or hear your name without feeling like someone just punched me in the gut.” the tears start streaming down your face, and you wipe at them furiously, embarrassed to be falling apart in front of him like this.

rafe just stands there, watching you with an intensity that makes your chest ache even more. “and sofia,” you continue, voice barely above a whisper now, “god, i hate her. i hate her. but not because of who she is. because she’s with you. because she’s standing where i used to stand, and i don’t know how to deal with that. i don’t know how to stop feeling like i’ve been replaced.”

you let out a shaky breath, trying to pull yourself together, but the tears keep falling. “i don’t know how to let go of you, rafe. i don’t think i ever learned how.”

for a moment, rafe doesn’t say anything, and you’re terrified that you’ve just completely exposed yourself, that you’ve made a fool of yourself

“rafe,” you whisper, feeling exposed, vulnerable. “i’m sorry.”

he steps forward again, and before you can say anything else, he cups your face in his large hands. “what the hell is wrong with you?” you breathe, staring into his eyes before gazing at his lips like they’re a threat. “get off of me.”

he keeps his hands cupping your face, his thumb coming up to brush any wetness away from underneath your eyes, his voice low, “y’know, i’ve missed you, y/n. more than you know.”

you blink up at him in shock, your tears momentarily forgotten.

“i don’t wanna keep pretending. i don’t wanna keep fighting this,” he murmurs, and in a heartbeat, his lips are on yours.

the kiss is slow at first, hesitant, like he’s testing the waters, unsure if this is what you want. but the second your lips meet his, everything else fades away, a rush of emotions flooding in. it’s as if all the anger, sadness, and longing come crashing together, igniting something inside you that you thought had flickered out.

his hand slides to the back of your neck, pulling you closer as he deepens the kiss, and you feel yourself melting into him, like this is the only thing that’s made sense in a long time.

you kiss him back with equal fervor, pouring everything into it—months of heartache, yearning, and unfulfilled desire. your hands find their way to his collar, gripping it tightly as you lose yourself in the moment.

the world blurs around you, and all you can focus on is him—the way his lips move against yours, the warmth of his hand on your skin, the way your heart is pounding so hard you can barely breathe. it’s the first time you’ve kissed him since the breakup, and it’s everything. too much, too fast, but exactly what you’ve both been craving. he tastes like everything you’ve missed, and the warmth of his body against yours feels like coming home.

when you finally pull back, both of you breathless, your foreheads rest against each other, eyes locked. his thumb moves, brushing lightly against your bottom lip, and your heart skips a beat. “french 75,” he whispers, like he’s tasted something familiar.

he knows. of course, he knows. he always knew your favorite drink. he can taste it on your tongue. you can’t help it—your lips twitch into a small smile, despite the tears still clinging to your lashes.

erm guys was that lowkey fastpaced as fuck.