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chackyxyooj · 11 months

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You Believed You Weren't Enough

No Manga Spoilers Present! - High School AU

Potential TW: Verbal Suggestive Harassment (Stupid High School delinquent type stuff (Not from any of the named characters) - please be weary if you get extremely uncomfortable with stuff like that)

WC ~ 13,000

“If you knew something bad was going to happen to someone, wouldn’t you try to stop it from happening?”

Admiration and jealousy - two emotions that are awfully different yet a little too similar. To admire someone is to regard another as worthy of respect due to their achievements and advantages. Jealousy is to envy someone for the very same achievements and advantages we admire. Hence is the reason why admiration and jealousy can so easily be mistaken for one another; especially in regard to someone we deem better than ourselves.

What is the turning point in which admiration turns to jealousy?

If someone could change themselves to be more akin to the person they admire, wouldn’t they?

Is it, after all, such a horrible thing to want to be like the person we admire? If jealousy is just a single misstep away from adoration, how can we be certain about which emotion we truly feel?

Sunlight streamed into the room, making it perfectly clear that ‘tomorrow’ had become ‘today.’

While you were never particularly fond of waking up, your body felt awfully different this morning. It wasn’t the groggy or heavy feeling someone feels when they’re sick, nor was it a reluctance to get out of bed. There was just something off about today. When you peeked open your eyes to search for your phone, you suddenly found yourself somewhere equally unfamiliar as it was familiar.

Instead of waking up in your apartment in the city, you found yourself waking up in your childhood home. Although the answer of ‘where’ was rather obvious, there were a lot of questions that currently raced through your mind.

Why were you back home? How did you get here? Did someone bring you here, or did you bring yourself here? Why did you need to pee so badly?

You rushed out of your room and to the bathroom. Between all of the strange questions that still played in your mind, you could at least find solace in the fact that you had woken up somewhere somewhat familiar instead of somewhere completely unknown. A strange silver lining to be sure, but a silver lining nonetheless.

As you finished with your business, old habits began kicking in and you quickly found yourself twisting across the bathroom the way you had when you were younger. Perhaps it was just being in the house that made you feel younger, but you couldn’t deny that you kind of… felt younger.

The water you washed your hands with was just as cold as the realisation that you didn’t just feel younger, you were younger.

You must have looked ridiculous - dashing from the bathroom to your bedroom while wiping your damp hands along the front of your shirt. Before you knew it, you found yourself staring at your phone in disbelief.

Today was ‘today,’ but the ‘today’ three years in the past.

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

If you were to describe your life so far using a single word, you’d likely use the word adequate. It wasn’t as if you disliked the life you lived, neither did you think that your life was significantly better than the average person. You of course had your fair share of highs and lows, but you’ve always believed that things could have been far worse. Hence is the reason why you simply describe your life as adequate .

You never really considered yourself as someone who looks back at their highschool years with fondness, however, you never really disliked them either. To be honest, you found that you could only deem your highschool experience as adequate. That wasn’t to say that you were looking forward to reliving your entire highschool experience.

A part of you hoped that you would wake up and realise that you were dreaming this whole time. Still, there was a part of you that knew that wouldn’t happen - the part of you that vaguely knew why this was happening in the first place.

In any case, waking up three years in the past isn't necessarily the worst thing that could have happened. You considered yourself lucky for waking up at the start of your first year of highschool. The path you had chosen post graduation wasn’t really something you were passionate about, so you would take this strange phenomenon as a blessing in disguise.

As the bell rang for the final time today, you collected your pencils and notebooks into your bag. You may have said goodbye to these familiar walls and seats once before, but now you were back. Nothing about the school was unfamiliar. Even if you hadn’t travelled three years back, it had only been a few weeks since graduation. You doubted that you could easily forget the place you spent so much time in.

You quickly fell back into old habits - weaving through crowds and getting to your locker as quickly as possible

Despite how you’ve seen everything here before, it was just… different. It was strange to recall such vivid memories of the future for things you would usually consider mundane. It was as though you were constantly filled with a feeling of deja vu.

The front entrance of the school was nostalgic.

The meticulous cracks that ran across your path home were as endearing as ever.

You even found the cherry blossom petals that were scattered across the road oddly charming.

You felt inclined to retract your earlier opinions about your highschool experience. Perhaps highschool wasn’t nearly as adequate as you’d made it out to be. Perhaps all it took was walking through these familiar sights that made you remember why you never really minded walking to and from school by yourself.

Though, to say you were walking by yourself right now would’ve been a generous statement.

As you made your way home, you couldn’t stop checking over your shoulder. You weren’t sure why, but someone had been following you for about three blocks now.

Despite your follower’s intimidating frame (and frankly, their overall delinquent-esque aura), they were also wearing a middle schooler's uniform. You couldn’t recall someone of your “follower’s” stature living in your area, but it wasn’t as if you usually noticed these kinds of things anyway.

Your curiosity suddenly turned to panic when the footsteps of your ‘follower’ sped up.

It would’ve been easy to assume that they were just trying to pass you, but the way their pace frequently slowed and sped up again didn’t give you too much hope. You did your best to keep a steady pace, hoping that the boy would back off or make up their mind to pass you. Weren’t these ‘delinquent’ types supposed to be cold and rude? This boy just seemed indecisive.

Despite your better judgement, you turned on your heel and faced your ‘follower.’

“Do you need something?” You questioned. You were surprised to see such a young boy suddenly standing across from you (though perhaps not entirely since he was wearing a middle school uniform). The moment you made eye contact, the younger boy redirected his gaze to the floor.

“I… umm… is this…?” the boy muttered.

“I’m sorry, I can’t hear what you’re saying.” You stepped closer to try and make out what he was saying, only for the boy to step back.

“Ah… it’s just that… I…”

“Sorry, I still can’t seem to understand you.”

The boy suddenly took a deep breath and reached into his pocket. Before you could properly react, the boy took your hand, placed something in it and then ran off.

Bewildered, you watched the boy run down the street until he was out of sight.

Everything about that interaction was certainly weird, but there was never a point where you genuinely felt threatened. As you looked at what the boy had handed you, you quickly realised two things.

First, the boy had returned your student card. Obviously, you must have dropped it without realising that you had dropped it in the first place. It was nice of him to bring it to you, even if he was rather sketchy while doing so. You almost felt bad for thinking he might’ve been some sort of delinquent, but only almost.

Secondly, when the boy had handed you your student card, he accidentally handed you his student card as well.

A strange feeling suddenly sprouted in the pit of your stomach as you read the boy’s name.

It’s not as though you knew who this person was. You couldn’t even recall having many friends younger than yourself back in highschool, let alone friends that could easily be mistaken for delinquents or something. Still, you needed to do something about the young boy’s student card. He’d gone the extra mile to return your student card to you, after all.

Against your better judgement, you began running in the direction you had watched the young boy disappear. You had to stop a few times to ask passersby if they had seen the boy in question. Your concern over having the boy’s student card led you farther and farther away from your own home. Just as you were losing hope, you spotted a familiar silhouette walking up a driveway a few houses down.

Seeing as you’d already come this far, you ran after the boy.

“Excuse me!” You tried to call out to the boy, but his movements only seemed to quicken. You scrambled after him in the most non threatening manner you could manage and stopped at the edge of the driveway. Out of breath from running, you huffed between each word. “Hold on… I have something for you!”

The young boy looked toward you but never met your gaze.

You held up your pointer finger, buying yourself some time to catch your breath. Just as you were about to pull the young boy’s student card out of your pocket, a hand roughly latched onto your wrist. Your eyes immediately shot up to meet with a new, unfamiliar pair.

“The hell do you think you’re doing?” The newcomer, a boy with white hair, scowled. You gently tried to pull your hand away from him but his grip was awfully strong. “Well?”

If you thought the young boy before looked like a delinquent with his mohawk, then the person who stood in front of you now was almost undeniably a delinquent. Even if it wasn’t for the older boy’s white hair, the glare in his eyes certainly made you feel uneasy. Needless to say, if looks could kill, you would’ve died.

“I have his student card…” The words you wanted to say got caught in your throat as the boy continued to stare down at you.

“Why? You steal it or something?”

“Of course not! I came to return it to him!” You blurted, earning another stern glare.

“So you followed him all the way back to our house? Creep.”

“I- okay yes, that was definitely not my brightest moment but-” You paused. Why had you followed the boy all the way back. Returning his card is fair enough, but why not just bring it to his school? Surely that would’ve been a safer and a marginally more effective way than following the young boy all the way out here, so why put in so much effort?

Was it because you wanted to do something nice? Ensuring that the boy’s student card somehow got back to him was essentially the bare minimum, but why go this far at all?

You suddenly found your gaze trailing toward the white haired male in front of you.

Was it because of him? You hadn’t realised it before, but the older boy was wearing the uniform of the same school that you currently attended. Staring at him now, there was definitely an air of familiarity around him.

The heavy feeling in the pit of your stomach returned as your eyes jumped between the pair of boys.

It is often said that memories are one of the most precious things in the world. Humans can do so much in a single day, yet not every single moment can be recalled at will. Generally, it’s only certain experiences, moments which elicit strong emotions, that can be recalled vividly. Past traumas, fleeting moments of joy and long periods of grief are many of the first things to come to mind when one brings up strong memories. It’s these kinds of memories that tend to shape people into who they are.

However, to say that people can only recall memories linked with strong emotion would also be incorrect. Sometimes, things we once perceived as unimportant can suddenly rush back when faced with some kind of trigger.

In this case, a trigger had gone off in your brain due to the name on the boy’s student card.

Genya Shinazugawa.

Shinazugawa.

While Genya wasn’t a name that immediately rang any bells, his last name, Shinazugawa, certainly did. Back when you were in highschool (the first time), you recalled the name Shinazugawa circulating around your school. Apparently he was a well known delinquent type who was rumoured to frequently get into fights. You never had the chance to confirm for yourself whether or not the rumours about your upperclassman was true - early on in your first year, news of Shinazugawa’s death spread like wildfire around your school.

You could feel a wave of adrenaline beginning to take over your senses, providing you with enough strength to pull your hand, along with the young boy’s student card, out of your pocket. “He accidently handed me his student card earlier and ran off before I could return it to him. I shouldn’t have followed him all the way here, that’s my mistake, but since I’ve already come all this way I might as well return it.”

There was a curious glint in the older boy’s eyes for a moment, but he turned away from you before you could confirm if what you saw was real.

“Genya! Get your ass over here!” The young boy, Genya, sheepishly made his way to the older boy’s side. “You better thank her for coming all this way.”

Genya turned his body toward you but kept his eyes on the ground. “T-thank you...”

“When you thank someone, look them in the eye for crying out loud.” The older boy berated, causing Genya to stiffen. “And speak up. What good is saying thanks if no one can hear you?

The young boy slowly lifted his gaze to meet yours, but no words came from him.

The silence between the three of you was awfully stiff, so you quickly filled it with words of your own. “Umm… don’t worry about it. I was simply returning the favour. How about you take your student card and call it even?” You put on your best smile, but it only made Genya turn his gaze away from you again.

Having had enough of the young boy’s attitude, the white haired male took the student card from your hand and slapped it into Genya’s hand. “The next time you do something nice for someone, make sure you don’t inconvenience them, dumbass!”

Not wanting to cause any more of a scene, you stepped away from the two boys. “I’m glad everything has worked out. I’ll be taking my leave now.” You turned away from the boys and began walking the way you had come, only to stop dead in your tracks when you met eyes with a small group of boys across the street.

They were wearing highschool uniforms, but not ones that you immediately recognized. Then again, it would be hard to recognize any school’s uniform when worn as improperly as what you were seeing right now.

The group of boys stood staring at you and the two Shinazugawas as they muttered something amusing to each other.

“What’s so funny? I got something on my face?” The white haired boy scowled.

You could feel your heart beginning to race and not in the cute kind of way. You felt like a cornered animal, ready to bolt at any sudden movement. You nearly jumped out of your skin when the white haired boy was suddenly standing right beside you, let alone when he pulled you back so you were standing beside Genya.

You weren’t really sure what to make of the situation. The whole time the older boy was staring down the other group of boys, you could only think about how you ended up getting yourself caught up in something like this in the first place.

All you wanted to do was one nice thing. Why did stuff like this always have to happen?

Just as you felt the last of your self restraint slip away, the group of boys began walking down the street. As the group turned the bend, you finally felt your body relax. You barely had a moment to relax though, since the moment the group was gone the older boy was back to scowling at you and the younger boy.

“Alright, it’s great that you went out of your way for my dumbass little brother, but you shouldn’t be seen around the likes of us.”

“Why?” You asked, your own curiosity getting the better of you.

“Why? Cause those shitheads are bad news, that’s why.” The older boy groaned. “Look, it’s better that you don’t get swept up in the wrong crowd. Just cut your losses and be on with your life already. We don’t need your pity.”

Pity, huh?

You abruptly turned away from the two boys. “You’re right. Pity is for the pathetic, and you certainly aren’t, so you don’t need it.”

“That’s great, are you done now?”

You could feel words bubbling up inside of your chest, but you ultimately held your tongue. To argue with a fool would simply make you a fool yourself.

You could hear Genya addressing the older boy as his brother as you walked away, but you didn’t bother turning back. You didn’t want to hear anything that the white haired boy might’ve had to say. Even if you did hear what he had to say, you were sure that it would only irritate you even more. What was so important about these two anyway? They were just strangers to you.

That’s right, nothing more than strangers.

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

As night came and went, and tomorrow became today, you found yourself stuck in the past. At this point you just had to accept that this was reality. You went through the motions of life just as you had before - wake up, breakfast, go to school, learn. It was the very same way you’ve always lived, but today something felt off.

This wouldn’t be the first time you’ve had an ‘off’ day, but something in particular was lingering at the back of your mind.

Had you been too harsh to the white haired boy yesterday? It wasn’t as though you said anything particularly insulting, but it wasn’t like you had been that great of a person either. There was no reason that you were obligated to apologise. You didn’t know them and they didn’t know you. What should it matter to you?

Still, there was little doubt in your mind that the boys you had met, the older one in particular, were the Shinazugawas. It wasn’t like they were the most unruly people you’d ever met. To be honest, the boys didn’t come off as bad people. A bit quick to jump to conclusions at times, sure, but that didn’t necessarily make them bad people.

Now that you really thought about it, hadn’t the older boy protected you? As rude as he may have been, he hadn’t left you to fend for yourself. That was worth something, right?

Thoughts from the ‘past’ nagged at you from the back of your mind.

…found dead… Shinazugawa… tragedy…

Could you really call yourself a good person if you knew someone was going to get hurt and didn’t do anything to stop it? That wasn’t the kind of person your parents raised you to be. It wasn’t the kind of person you wanted to be.

If only your parents weren’t abroad right now. Your mother has always known how to address these sorts of things. Life was always so much better when they were around, but unfortunately for you they weren’t around often. Still, this wouldn’t be the first time you’ve had to solve your own problems and it certainly wouldn’t be the last.

Perhaps the next time you saw one of the two boys, you would try to befriend them.

The school bell rang and informed all that it was time for lunch. Just as you were about to pull out your lunch, a familiar figure walked past one of the windows of your classroom. Before you knew it, you were slipping through the crowds of people as you made your way outside. It seemed like doing things despite your better judgement was becoming something of a trend.

You weren’t sure what the older Shinazugawa was doing outside, but due to the way your classroom was positioned it seemed like he was heading toward the main gate. Was he cutting class? It would certainly fit the delinquent-esque persona he had accumulated.

As you scanned the courtyard for the older boy, you couldn’t help but curse the sun for being unreasonably bright today. This was making things unnecessarily difficult. Should you just give up and look again later? It wasn’t like you didn’t know where they lived - not to sound creepy of course! On second thought, perhaps it would be better to approach the older boy at school so as to not arouse any suspicion.

So caught up in trying to find the white haired boy, you didn’t even realise that you had neglected to change your shoes. By the time you realised it, you were already falling.

You braced for impact but instead of hitting the ground, someone had caught you.

“Umm… are you alright?”

For some reason, you expected to meet a golden gaze when you opened your eyes. Instead, you were met with a pale shade of purple.

“It’s you!” The words accidentally slipped from your lips. You pulled away quickly when you realised you were clinging to the very person you were trying to find. The moment it seemed that the older boy recognised you, he turned and started walking away. A bit panicked, you grabbed the boy’s sleeve. “Wait, I need to speak with you!”

The older boy stopped walking, but neither did he turn to look at you.

“I umm… I want to apologise for the way I acted yesterday. It was rather immature of me to do and say the things I did, so I sincerely hope that you don’t harbour any ill will towards me.”

“Oh… it’s fine.”

“You’re certain about that?”

“Uhh…”

“What’s going on?” A newcomer suddenly asked.

You and the older boy turned towards the newcomer - none other than the young boy, Genya. He had an oddly tense expression on his face as he looked at the two of you in what you could only describe as irritation.

“Oh, Shinazugawa-kun! It’s you!” You pulled away from the older boy and turned your attention to the newcomer. “I apologise for the inconvenience I caused you yesterday. I hope you don’t-”

“I really don’t care.”

You were taken aback by the young boy’s sudden quip, reduced to having a blank stare on your face. It’s not like you really knew the kid, but you’d be lying if you said that his response hadn’t come from left field.

To be honest, something about this entire interaction has rubbed you the wrong way. Both of the boys were acting so different from how they had yesterday, but their actions weren’t entirely foreign. It was like… almost like they had adopted each other’s mannerisms and habits overnight. But things like that don’t happen normally.

As if you could describe what you’d gone through as normal.

You’ve heard rumours about strange things happening to people for reasons that couldn’t be explained - you had become especially curious about it back when you attended high school the ‘first’ time; back when one of your childhood friends had… passed away. From all of your research and questioning, you’d managed to find something that seemed to fit: Adolescence Syndrome - a mysterious syndrome that only affects those who enter puberty. Then perhaps…

By the time you returned to your current situation, the two boys were walking away from you. Panicked, and not entirely without ulterior motives, you called out to them.

“Genya-kun!” Where most people would’ve expected the younger boy to turn first, it was actually the white haired boy who turned to face you. It wasn’t a big difference in timing, likely just a second or two, but the look on his face told you more than enough.

“What?” The younger boy was glaring at you now.

“I wanted to ask why you decided to return my student card to me yesterday. You could’ve left it alone - or just given it to Shinazugawa-senpai to give to me for that matter, but you didn’t. I think it was very nice of you to do something like that. You’re a good person.”

The two boys exchanged a look between each other, making you feel oddly self conscious. Finally, the younger boy broke the silence. “Is that all you came here to say?”

“Well no, but-”

“Then we’re leaving.”

As Genya turned around to leave, the older boy quickly grabbed hold of his brother’s sleeve. “Sanemi, you’re being too harsh.” The moment the words left his mouth, the older boy had slapped a hand overtop of his own mouth.

“The two of you…” You started, the two boys turning to face you. “You’re experiencing Adolescence Syndrome, aren’t you?”

A look of confusion formed on the face of both boys, but the younger boy’s expression quickly shifted. “The hell are you talking about?” The young boy suddenly spouted, causing you to reel back in surprise. His expression was complicated. Even so, there was an underlying softness that reminded you of someone else.

You quickly shook the notion away and returned to the issue at hand. “Adolescence Syndrome isn’t really something that you can explain with logic. It’s not even something I understand myself, but can what happened really be explained away by logic? Whatever happened to you two isn’t normal.”

“Is that right?” The younger boy asked sarcastically but you quickly cut him off.

“But I think I know how to help you.”

“Wait, really?” The older boy suddenly piped, “You can make us go back to normal?”

“I can’t guarantee anything, but I want to try to help in any way I can.”

“Why?”

You paused for a moment. Once again, you were brought back to the ever looming question of why. Why help these people when you barely knew them? Why put in so much effort for people who you’ll likely never see again after this day? You turned your eyes to meet the older boy’s gaze. You admired the softness on his face. It was such a stark contrast to what you’d seen yesterday. To be frank, it was different from what either of the boys had shown you yesterday. It was so familiar though. You couldn’t even begin to imagine how you’d feel if someone with such a genuine look ended up dead.

Wouldn’t it make you a bad person if you knew someone was going to die, and let them?

“I guess… if you knew something bad was going to happen to someone, wouldn’t you try to stop it from happening?” A sad smile unconsciously pulled at your lips as you turned your gaze toward the younger boy. “That’s the very reason why you intervened the way you did yesterday, isn’t it, Shinazugawa-senpai? ”

The younger boy opened his mouth to spit a snarky reply, but stopped as he met your gaze. “Whatever…” The boy eventually mumbled. “Just don’t go causing us trouble or anything.”

A tight feeling suddenly enveloped your chest, but you smiled regardless. “Of course! I look forward to helping the two of you!”

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

Back when you attended high school the ‘first’ time, you were a volunteer at an animal shelter. You had found that aside from studying, it was the best way to bide your time as exams came and went. With that in mind, you understood why Shinazugawa-senpai was mildly familiar. You hadn’t realised it a few days ago, but the older boy had a part time job working for the very same animal shelter you used to (and currently) volunteered for. Then again, you couldn’t really expect yourself to recognize him since… well, he and your time at the shelter didn’t coincide for very long.

In any case, you were going to change that. Not with any ulterior motives obviously! You didn’t think you could handle more people in your life at the moment. Not when their presence in your life would be so uncertain, and especially not people who’re also-

“Umm… (Y/n)-san, would you mind helping me?”

You turned your head towards the newer, meeker version of Sanemi Shinazugawa. As far as the three of you understood, Sanemi and Genya had swapped bodies. There was no obvious rhyme or reason for the swap, but you hoped that by spending time with them you could narrow down the cause of their Adolescence Syndrome, let alone return them to normal.

“Of course, Shinazugawa-senpai.” You replied, glancing at the bags of kibble that still had to be put away. “Just give me a minute.”

The first hour of conversation between the three of you had certainly proven to be the most confusing. There wasn’t an obvious way for you to address one brother or the other. Eventually, having had enough of all the confusion, the three of you agreed on two things: First was that in private, you would address Sanemi and Genya by their first names relative to who they were, and not whose body you were addressing. Neither boy preferred the respect of honorifics over convenience, so that was that. In turn, the boys could call you whatever they deemed fit so long as it wasn’t insulting.

Secondly, out in public you would refer to Genya as Shinazugawa-senpai, and Sanemi as Shinazugawa-kun. While the two boys might not have minded, you thought it best if you referred to the boys how you would on any other day. This way if you saw them again after this whole ordeal, assuming that the switch back would eventually happen, it wouldn’t be weird for you to refer to them as if they were acquaintances.

Despite everything, they would likely remain nothing but acquaintances. For your own safety, it would be better if you didn’t become too familiar with them. You were here to help them, not to make friends.

“(Y/n)-san, please hurry…”

“I’ll be right there!” You called back, tucking the last bag of kibble into the cupboard. You quickly made your way over to Genya. “Okay, what seems to be the-'' The moment you turned the corner, you couldn’t help but grin. Genya, in Sanemi’s body, was being overrun with more animals than he could hold.

“(Y/n)-san, please help me!” Genya pleaded with you, a desperate look in his eyes. You wasted no time in helping the poor boy. The animals seemed a bit sad to be pulled away from the older boy’s form, but Genya seemed heavily relieved. As soon as all of the animals were placed back into their respective pens, Genya wasted no time in letting out a deep sigh.

“It seems that you’re quite popular with the animals in this shelter, Shinazugawa-senpai.”

“No, not me. Animals don’t really like me, they like Sanemi. I just happen to be the one in his body.”

You shook your head. “No, I can tell they like you. They seem more gentle than usual. It must be because they can sense your gentle heart, Shinazugawa-senpai.”

“You really think so?”

“Yes, I do!” You insisted. “You should come back to the shelter when you’re back in your own body. I’m sure the animals would love it.”

“I don’t know. I don’t really think I should.”

“Why not?”

“I umm… I’m not very useful around here. I’m sure I’d only get in the way.”

“Who knows? You just might…” You admitted, poking a finger into a nearby cage. The animal inside approached you slowly before rubbing the top of its head against your finger, making you chuckle. After a moment, you turned your eyes toward the boy. “Even so, I wouldn’t mind helping you out. After all, I really do think that you’re a good person, Genya.”

Genya looked at you and you instinctively smiled. Though the boy initially averted his gaze, he eventually returned your gaze with a soft smile of his own. It looked kind of strange to see Sanemi’s face with such a soft expression, but you were slowly getting used to it.

Unconsciously, the smile on your lips finally reached your eyes.

“You have a really pretty smile, (Y/n)-san.” The boy across from you blurted, taking both of you by surprise. The moment Genya fully processed what he’d said, he began stuttering and panicking in an attempt to relieve himself of his own embarrassment. You were certain that the look on the older boy’s face wasn’t one he’d make on his own, but you could easily imagine Genya’s own face making this kind of expression. At that, you couldn’t help but want to laugh.

“Thank you, Shinazugawa-senpai. I’m certain that smiles don’t look half bad on you either.” You replied, watching as your companion slowly began recomposing himself.

By the time either of you realised it, it was time to head back. It wasn’t much, but you felt like you were beginning to better understand the younger of the Shinazugawa brothers. Talking with Genya had become significantly easier. Admittedly, the fact that Genya wasn’t afraid to talk to you anymore was a big help. You only hoped that things would go this smoothly with the older of the two brothers.

As the two of you continued on your way back to where you’d meet Sanemi (in Genya’s body), you couldn’t shake the feeling of dread that had begun building inside you. Regardless, you did your best to suppress the feeling.

“Are you okay, (Y/n)-san?” Genya suddenly asked.

“Of course.” You quickly replied, hoping that the smile on your face would put him at ease. “I think helping out at the shelter has drained away a significant portion of my energy, but I’m certain that I’ll be fine as soon as I get home and sleep.”

“Oh, okay then…” the boy shrugged, “just make sure you don’t forget to eat something before you head to bed, okay?”

“I didn’t think I’d get a lecture from you so soon, Shinazugawa-senpai.” You teased, causing the older boy’s face to erupt in bright pink.

“I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to offend you, (Y/n)-san! It’s just that-” Genya’s apology was quickly cut short by a group of boys who now stood in front of you.

One of the newcomers clicked his tongue in an amused fashion. “Well well, what do we have here?”

“Funny seeing you here, Shinazugawa.” Another of the boys voiced.

You glanced to see what Genya might do in response, only to realise he was in just as much fear as you were - and unfortunately for you two, it wouldn’t take a genius to realise that the ‘Sanemi’ beside you wasn’t a fighter. Genya didn’t know how to exude any of his older brother’s mannerisms, and goodness knows the three of you tried. Not like any of that really mattered since you were outnumbered 4 to 2.

You didn’t want to force Genya’s hand, so you decided to put your big girl pants on.

“It must not be that funny if nobody’s laughing.” You explained bluntly. “Come on, Shinazugawa-senpai. Let’s go.”

“Hold on, leaving so fast?” Another of the boys said, blocking your way past. “You his girlfriend or something?”

You ignored the remarks from the boy, grabbing hold of Genya and pulling him along. You could feel the piercing gaze of all the boys as you pushed your way through the small group, leaving you to comfort yourself with the fact that the sooner you faced them, the faster the two of you could get away.

“You’re gonna walk away just like that, huh?”

“I told you he was all bark and no bite!”

“What a loser.”

All of a sudden, Genya stopped in his tracks. From the look on his face, you could tell something unsavoury would happen if you didn’t intervene.

“Don’t listen to them, Shinazugawa-senpai. They’re just trying to get under your skin.”

“On the contrary.” One of the boys jeered, grabbing your wrist and pulling you away from Genya. “Why would I wanna get under this loser’s skin when I would much rather… get on top of someone else?” The boy leaned down to whisper. His breath sent all kinds of alarms off in your head, making you reel back and shove the creep away.

He ended up stumbling backwards and landing on his back, making two of the other boys laugh. Now irritated, the creep stood up and raised his hand to strike you.

You shut your eyes, but the blow never came.

Any relief you felt quickly disappeared when you opened your eyes. Though you had hoped that Genya would be the one standing in front of you, he wasn’t. No, the one who stood in front of you was another of the delinquents. The air around him was significantly different from the other three. It made the terror you’d felt before pale in comparison.

“Were you really just gonna stand there and do nothing?” This fourth boy, someone you could only assume was the leader of this little delinquent squad, quipped. The way his eyes looked straight through you sent chills throughout your entire body.

You opened your mouth to reply but no words formed. Everything you might’ve wanted to say was caught in the deepest part of your chest.

“It’s pitiful to simply watch, Shinazugawa.” The boy continued, his cold eyes now trained on who he thought was Sanemi Shinazugawa. “Cowards like you piss me off the most. You and this harlot aren’t even worth our time.”

As the group of boys began walking away, you could sense unrest stirring inside of Genya.

You grabbed onto the boy’s sleeve and tugged lightly. “Come on, Shinazugawa-senpai. I don’t want to get into deeper trouble.” You could still hear the group of boys making fun of yourself and Sanemi as they walked away, and you were certain Genya could hear them too.

“Take it back.” Genya muttered.

One of the boys, the creep in particular, turned around with a smug grin. “What was that, shitty-gawa?”

“I said to take it back!” Genya huffed. “All that shit you said about (Y/n)-san and Sa- me. Take it back.”

“And what’re you gonna do if we don’t? Cry about it?”

“You-!”

“What? You tryna say that you’re more than a useless coward?” The leader of the boys laughed. “Fine by me. If you wanna prove you’re not all bark so badly, you can meet us by that shitty bar tonight. You know the one. I’m sure you and your baby of a brother have been there on more than one occasion.”

The small group of boys walked somewhere further into the city and out of sight. To be honest, you felt a great weight fall off your chest the moment the boys were out of sight. When you turned back to face Genya, you couldn’t help but notice the look in his eyes.

A pang of sadness etched at your heart, but you shook it away. “Shinazugawa-senpai? Hey, are you okay? Can you hear me?” You spoke gently, trying to call the boy back to reality. “Genya?”

The boy finally directed his gaze towards you, but kept his mouth shut.

It really was such a sad expression.

Finally, you breathed a sigh. “Come on then, let’s go.”

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

The walk to your designated meeting spot was, for the most part, a quiet one. You’d tried to strike up a few small conversations, but it seemed that all of the ease of conversation had disappeared without a trace. You never liked forcing conversation, but you kept trying regardless. If you didn’t it would be as if you were admitting that some part of you didn’t mind the distance. Admitting something like that probably made you a bad person, right?

“Navigation complete. You are now at your destination.”

You breathed a sigh of relief and closed your navigation app. When you looked up from your phone, you were surprised to be standing in front of a Kendo studio. You hadn’t taken Genya as someone who partook in many physical activities, but you also wouldn’t take Sanemi to be the kind of person who worked part time at an animal shelter. In other words, you would have to keep more of an open mind for these kinds of things.

“Should we wait outside for Sanemi or should we go inside?” You asked.

Genya shrugged. “They’ll probably be a little while longer, so we should head inside.”

You nodded and the two of you promptly went inside.

The studio was nothing too large. There was a reception desk to the left of the door that served as the main barrier between the lobby and the main area. Looking past the desk, you could make out about a dozen or so people in the room. Of the people there, the only one you could recognize was Genya - well, Sanemi in Genya’s body, anyway.

You weren’t particularly familiar with kendo, but you could tell that Sanemi was good. Each of his actions appeared to naturally flow into the next. There was barely any wasted motion or any missed beats. Above all else, there was passion.

You’ve always been aware that being good or talented at something can only bring a person so far. It was clear that Sanemi was skilled, talented even, but there was also passion. It sparked a sort of effort that not every person has the chance of experiencing in their life, and it was something you suddenly found yourself admiring about the older boy.

As you turned to face your companion, you couldn’t ignore the look on his face. You thought it looked familiar, but why?

Suddenly, Genya turned and looked straight at you. “(Y/n)-san, I’m going to use the bathroom. I’ll be right back.” Before you could ask if he was okay the boy quickly scurried off in some unknown direction of the studio.

You felt a little sheepish by the fact that you had been caught staring, but you didn’t think that Genya would hold it against you. He was such a kind boy, after all.

A deep fear suddenly pulled at your stomach as the thoughts of the Shinazugawa death taunted you. Now that you really thought about it, you wondered if the boy’s death was related to the body swap that had occurred. Could it have been Genya’s consciousness that died in Sanemi’s body that night? Would getting them to swap back be the only way to prevent Sanemi, no, Genya’s death? But how would you even go about doing something like that? And how would you even know for sure if-

“Hey.”

You yelped as the newcomer tapped your shoulder. You could feel your face beginning to warm when you turned around and came face to face with Sanemi (in Genya’s body). “Oh, sorry Shinazugawa-kun. I wasn’t expecting you to approach me so suddenly.”

“I thought it was pretty obvious that I was heading your way.”

“Was it really that obvious though?”

Sanemi gave you a skepitical look but didn’t question you about it further. “Whatever weirdo.”

“I thought we agreed that you wouldn’t call me by any insulting names.” You frowned.

“Being weird ain’t an insult.”

“Well I don’t particularly see it as a compliment. Especially when it’s from someone I hardly know.” You watched as Sanemi shrugged off your comment. You weren’t sure whether you should be insulted or not.

As you were thinking of something witty to reply in response to Sanemi’s indifference, one of the boys who’d been training alongside Sanemi walked over to the two of you. “Wow Genya-kun!” The newcomer smiled. “You were really good today! Have you started doing something new between this class and the previous one?”

Sanemi, in the younger boy’s body of course, shrugged. “Nope.”

“Really? It almost felt like you were an entirely new person today! Are you sure nothing’s changed?”

“Yup.”

“Oh, I see…” The newcomer looked between you and your companion. His gaze was rather curious but the boy kept any questions he might have had to himself as he walked away.

“He’s not wrong, you know.” You stated.

“About being a different person? Yeah, no shit.”

“Well yes, there’s that, but I was thinking more along the lines of ‘you were really good today’ and whatnot.”

Sanemi scoffed. “You don’t gotta patronize me.”

“I’m serious. I don’t know very much about kendo, but even I can tell at a glance that you’re good.” You smiled. For the first time, Sanemi let the young boy’s face shift from his usual scowl to something softer. “Forgive me if I’m overstepping my bounds, but it seems like you’re passionate about kendo. Why haven’t you joined the club at our school?”

An irritated look suddenly spread across the younger boy’s face. “Cause I have a job, obviously. Unlike you and my brother, I don’t have that kind of time.”

“I’m sure that the boss would let your schedule be a bit more flexible since-”

“I already told you, I can’t. Just leave it at that.”

“Oh…” You mumbled awkwardly. “Apologies for prying.”

The two of you stood absorbed in a tense atmosphere for a moment. You questioned your resolve to help these two boys for a moment, but questioning your resolve immediately made you feel worse than the atmosphere did. How could you even be so selfish with someone else’s life on the line?

You could feel the words in your throat beginning to stop in their tracks. There wasn’t even a reason why you should be feeling this way! You really hated this feeling. You really wished that you were stronger, like him.

Something about your expression must’ve given your true feelings away because as soon as Sanemi saw your face, there was a change in his demeanour. “Look, I didn’t mean it to sound like I was telling you to shut it or anything, so don’t look so sad. My situation’s just… fucked up.”

“Sorry…”

“And stop apologizing so much. You’re starting to sound like my brother.”

“Sorry.” You replied. Sanemi gave you a look, but it wasn’t nearly as menacing as before. “Hey, anytime anyone tells someone else to stop apologizing, they immediately apologize. Besides, is a genuine apology such a bad thing?”

“Course not, but apologies don’t stop people from getting hurt.”

You gave Sanemi a curious look. “Is that supposed to comfort me?”

“Well I’m not trying to threaten you or nothing but speaking from experience, apologies don’t mean shit if the other person is just looking for a fight.”

“Are you speaking from experience, Sanemi?” You asked, genuinely concerned. The young boy’s face became tinted as though he’d said more than he meant to. Or perhaps he reacted that way because of something else? You weren’t sure because the boy quickly started steering the conversation in a different direction.

“Look, this isn’t the kind of place I wanna say that kinda stuff. Let’s just get out of here. Where’s Genya?”

“Oh, Shinazugawa-senpai is…”

“Sorry I took so long, but I’m ready to go if you two are.” Announced Genya as he reappeared.

“What the hell took you so long?”

Genya winced at his brother’s sudden tone. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t surprised by his sudden shift in tone as well. “Sorry… I just wasn’t feeling that well.”

“You’ve been in my body for less than a day and you’re already getting sick? You’re hopeless.” Genya opened his mouth to reply but Sanemi cut him off. “Whatever. Let’s just go home already.”

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

Sanemi had basically marched out of the kendo studio which left you and Genya to chase after him. A few short exchanges later, you were walking in stride with Genya while Sanemi walked ahead of you both. You did your best to spark some idle chit-chat between the two brothers, but nothing was really working. Most topics ended with Genya giving a curt reply or with Sanemi saying something a bit sharp to Genya. Either way, it wasn’t going well.

You let out a sigh. It’s not like you were an expert with this ‘Adolescent Syndrome’ thing. To be honest, you hadn’t even believed such a thing really existed until recently. No matter how much you wanted to help these boys, that didn’t mean that you could.

You examined the features of the boy who walked beside you - Genya in Sanemi’s body. His gaze was trained on the ground as the two of you advanced. Deep in thought, perhaps? It seemed like Genya did that quite often. Actually, it wasn’t all that different from how you were; perhaps how you still are, even.

“How much further till we reach your house?” Sanemi suddenly asked.

You looked at him inquisitively. “Why? Trying to stalk me or something?”

“Course not.” The boy snapped. “I’m just tryna make sure you get home safely.”

“You don’t have to worry about me too much, Sanemi. I’m a big girl. I can get home on my own.”

“This area of town ain’t what I’d call safe for a girl like you. If you’re really that scared about us knowing where you live then we’ll walk you to the school. At least the people over there give a shit if there’s a ruckus.”

“Well, it is starting to get dark outside. I suppose I wouldn’t mind the company.” You admitted, smiling. “Still, won’t your parents worry about you two if you aren’t home at a reasonable time?”

“Probably not.” Sanemi shrugged. “The only one who gets on our case is Sumi.”

“Sumi?”

“Our younger sister.” Replied Genya.

You turned your gaze to the boy walking beside you. “There’s more than just the two of you?”

“There’s seven in total including the two of us here, actually.”

“Woah. That sounds… really nice.” You stood staring at Sanemi’s face with wide eyes. Although the boy’s expression was initially one of confusion, unsure of how to interpret your reaction, it shifted to something softer upon hearing your words.

“It probably sounds nicer than it actually is.” Genya replied, now averting his gaze. You couldn’t help but admire the soft look in his (though technically Sanemi’s) eyes. “There’s barely ever a peaceful moment in the house! At least one of our siblings will be screaming for me or Sanemi at any moment of the day. It gets pretty tiring, but I wouldn’t trade them for the world.”

“Quite a family boy, huh Genya?” You teased, earning a flushed look from the boy. “It’s admirable how much you care about them - how much you both care about them.”

“You think so?”

“Of course!”

“Less talking, more walking.” Muttered Sanemi from in front of you. “We’re never gonna make it back at this rate.”

“Please, you’re as much of a family boy as your brother, Sanemi. You just don’t like showing it.”

Sanemi turned around and shot you a stern look. “What would you know about me?”

Though you opened your mouth to reply, the words refused to leave your chest. As much as you wished you hadn’t noticed, and you really wished you hadn’t noticed, a certain group of boys happened to be loitering in the alley that you’d just passed. You could tell by the way the older boy’s body tensed that Genya had noticed them too. You just had to hope that they hadn’t noticed you.

But of course, fate wasn’t that kind.

“Yo! Chicken boy! Where do you think you’re going?”

All three of you stopped in your tracks. For a moment, the world stood still. Should you run? That would be the safest option, right? Someone like you probably wouldn’t stand a chance in a street fight, but what about the other two? Would they stay? If that was the case, shouldn’t you stay too? You already knew the ending to this story, so wouldn’t it be foolish of you to run at such a moment?

Footsteps approached your little trio. You had to fight the urge to flee. Survival is a natural human instinct, after all.

“Look what we have here!” A newcomer, the creep from earlier, turned the corner and examined you all. “It’s Mister Talentless and his coward of a brother. And you even brought your girlfriend along… perfect!”

“She’s not my- his girlfriend!” Sanemi snapped. “Why don’t you fuck off before something bad happens to you?”

The creep turned his gaze over to Genya (in Sanemi’s body). “First you let your girlfriend talk for you and now your younger brother? How you’ve fallen, Sanemi. I bet you weren’t even planning on defending your honour. How pathetic.”

Sanemi suddenly turned to you and Genya. “The hell’s he talking about?”

A fierce silence suddenly enveloped the air. Your chest became stiff and you felt like you were going to suffocate under the young boy’s gaze. You looked to Genya for an explanation but he looked just as nervous as you were.

“We umm…” You took a deep breath but it didn’t calm your nerves. “We ran into a bit of trouble on our way to the studio.” You finally admitted.

“A bit of trouble? I thought we were just having fun!” The creep jeered. “You see, Mister Talentless, your cowardly older brother wouldn’t even protect his own girlfriend. He was just going to watch her get hurt. Then again, I guess that’s better than hurting her himself, ya know?”

The look on both of the boy’s faces left you in confusion. It was obviously an insult, but even you could tell that you were missing some context here. The creep on the other hand, grinned. He’d managed to strike quite the chord. Seemingly satisfied with the amount of misery he’d caused, the creep turned and began heading in the direction he’d come from. Just before he turned the corner though, he spat one final remark. “It’s no wonder you two are brothers - you both share your father’s nasty blood.”

The wordless look on the younger boy’s face abruptly shifted. Sanemi started marching after the creep but you quickly stopped him.

“Don’t touch me!” Sanemi snapped as he pulled away from your grasp. “There’s no way I’m letting an asshole like him get away with saying shit like that to me. He needs to learn his fucking place already.”

“What about Genya? And the rest of your siblings! They’d be devastated if Genya-”

“This body ain’t gonna die from a few measly punches.”

“That’s not what I was implying, but…” You trailed off. There was no way you were going to be able to talk him out of this. You’ve only really spent about a day’s worth of time with the boys, but that was more than enough time to realise just how serious Sanemi was about this. You could feel your stomach turning as you watched Sanemi march after the creep. You couldn’t get the thought of the Shinazugawa death out of your head.

Because of confidentiality, the true identity of the body hadn’t been released to the public. You never saw Sanemi at school after the death, but you also never went to their funeral. Why would you? You didn’t know them back then. Still, who was to say that Sanemi was the one that died? Could it have been Genya’s body (and Sanemi’s consciousness) that had been lost during your previous ‘today?’

Was Sanemi fated to die tonight?

Why did it matter whose body and whose mind died? If someone was going to get hurt - if someone was going to die - you should do your best to make sure that it doesn’t happen! That’s the kind of thing that’s expected from good people, right?

“Genya, please help me talk Sanemi out of this!” You looked at Genya with expecting eyes only to be met with nothing. You couldn’t make out a single thought Genya might’ve had because the older boy’s face hid everything. It’s not like Genya was a super expressive boy, but his current lack of clear emotion made you feel uneasy.

Genya muttered something that you couldn’t understand. He took a step toward you, but his eyes weren’t looking at you at all. “Please go home, (Y/n)-san.”

“What?” You stammered. “But what about you and Sanemi?”

“I don’t think Sanemi would be happy with me if I let you chase after him here, but I’d never be able to live with myself if I made Sanemi deal with any more of my problems. He doesn’t deserve a brother like that.”

“But even so I-”

“Please (Y/n)-san.”

“No.” You said firmly. “Why would I ever leave someone to get hurt if I know something bad will happen to them? People like us don’t do that kind of thing. You know that already, don’t you Genya? If you’re worried about me getting hurt then… well, don’t. I promise I’ll stay out of harm’s way, but I’m staying.”

Metal clanging came from the alley you’d seen Sanemi and the creep disappear into. Despite all of his hesitancy, Genya let you follow after him as he dashed toward the noise.

As you ran deeper into the alley, you saw that two of the four boys from earlier were already laying on the ground. They were extremely roughed up. Sanemi had managed to do all this in that short amount of time? Where even was Sanemi?

A little bit away from them, you noticed Genya’s body on the floor. The creep from earlier was standing over the young boy’s body and was kicking him in the gut. He was laughing and mocking the boy, clearly unaware that the one he was mocking wasn’t who he thought it was. Although you had stopped in your tracks at the sight, Genya had kept running toward the boy. Just when the creep realised Genya was running toward him, Genya struck him across his face and sent him tumbling onto the ground.

“That was a real cheap shot, you fucking coward.” The creep spat.

Genya ignored the creep as he pulled his brother up to his feet. Sanemi didn’t look pleased in the slightest to be seeing his brother, but you also thought he didn’t look mad.

“I’m surprised you showed up, Sanemi.” The leader taunted from behind the creep. The very sound of the leader’s voice made your body stiffen. “I thought you were just gonna high tail it outta here like the coward you are, but you didn’t. I’d say that you’re almost worth respecting. Almost. Your face still pisses me off.”

As the creep moved to stand up, the leader of the little delinquent gang stood in front of him. Your eyes locked with the leader’s own for a brief moment. In that brief moment alone, it felt like his entire presence was suffocating you.

“Those are some strong words from someone with such an ugly face.” Sanemi spat.

“Not everyone gets to be blessed with a strong figure like you, Mister Talentless. Still, my hideous face is also a blessing.”

“Nothing about you is a blessing. You’re nothing but a fucking curse.”

“You might be right about that!” The leader’s laugh was a sickening sound. Still, he held himself with pride and grinned at the two boys. “But at least I’m not a coward. Not like your ‘dear older brother’, or like your drunkard father. Better hope you don’t turn into him someday.”

Genya clenched his fists and muttered something.

“What was that, you coward?”

“I told you to get lost already!” Genya finally exploded, lunging toward the leader with clenched fists.

The leader quickly dodged under the boy’s fist and landed a blow directly in the boy’s gut. Genya paused for a moment, but he very quickly turned around and attempted to hit the leader again. The leader managed to move just around the boy’s fist only to get clocked by Sanemi. Where you thought you’d see frustration, the leader of the delinquents only grinned.

“Weak. Did those kicks really sap that much strength outta you?” The leader then struck a blow across Sanemi’s (in Genya’s body) face. “That’s what you call a punch.”

“I was just holding back for your sake, dumbass.” Provoked, Sanemi cracked his fingers. “But if that’s how you wanna be, I’ll gladly beat your skull in.”

“Don’t!” Genya suddenly shouted. “This isn’t your fight, Genya.”

“Looks like the coward is finally gaining some courage.” The leader snarked. “Well then, let’s see what you’ve got.”

Anything Sanemi might’ve wanted to say to Genya, he didn’t. Instead, he was left to watch the fight without interfering. It’s not like he didn’t believe in Genya, but this was his brother. If anyone knew his brother’s limitations, it was Sanemi. Still, Sanemi couldn’t deny that his entire body was heavy. That bastard was right; his punches had gotten pathetic.

The older boy, stuck in his younger brother’s body, was reduced to a spectator.

Every part of his, well, Genya’s body, wanted him to step in. He wasn’t the type to let others fight his battles! But he had to remind himself that this was his battle. This was Genya’s fight as much as it was his own, and he should respect that.

Still, with every passing moment and every blow exchanged, Sanemi was becoming more and more restless. If this went on any longer, someone would surely-

“Sanemi!”

A hand, your hand, pushed the boy and caused him to stumble forward. As Sanemi turned around to tell you off, he saw that you were trembling. All of the information came flooding to him at once.

The troublemaker from earlier standing in front of you with a small shiv in his hand.

The police sirens approaching from the distance.

The rapid scrambling of the four other boys.

His own voice ringing in his ears.

The blood that dripped from your hand that held onto his own.

Everything was such a blur, but one fact rang clearly in his mind: just then, he’d almost died.

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

Three years ago, before ‘yesterday’ suddenly became ‘tomorrow,’ you read the headline of an article depicting a tragic death.

Young Boy Found Dead Due To Stab Wound: Another Shinazugawa! Tragedy Or Fate?

The recollection of that article that you’d read the ‘first time’ around made you feel sick. It was clear to you now that the boy who’d died back then wasn’t just Genya, but Sanemi who was inside of Genya’s body. Still, how could they have posted such a tasteless article back then? You were glad this wouldn’t be the case this time around, but still, after everything that happened, you began to recall what the article detailed.

The reason why the article was passed for publishing was because no information aside from Genya’s death was revealed. In fact, the article mostly detailed the death of their father: someone the article called a perpetually drunken scumbag. It wasn’t much, but it started to shed some light about why and how this case of Adolescence Syndrome came to be - but knowing how it happened and fixing it were two very different things.

Adolescence Syndrome only causes strange and abnormal things to happen, but that doesn’t mean that it stops bad things from happening. If anything, it made situations go from bad to worse.

You turned off the stove and grabbed three bowls from the cabinet. You subconsciously placed your hand onto the counter as you placed the bowls down, causing you to jerk away from the countertop. You were glad that you stopped the knife with your non-dominant hand, but that didn’t make the pain any better. If only you’d been a bit faster, you could’ve grabbed the attacker’s wrist and not the knife itself.

You made a mental note to get the wound checked out as soon as possible, but you’d have to let your parents know so that they could fill out the paperwork. You really hated inconveniencing them, but this was probably just the consequence of your own actions.

You sighed deeply, pushing all of your current worries aside and focusing on the task at hand.

While you’d initially tried to grab all three bowls of congee at once, your wound quickly made it obvious that you wouldn’t be able to do that. Instead, you took one bowl and headed off in the direction where Genya had decided to tend to his wounds.

You knocked on the door lightly before letting yourself in.

“You haven’t fallen asleep, have you?” You asked as you entered the room. Genya was holding an ice pack against the side of his face (technically Sanemi’s face) to prevent swelling, but seemed okay otherwise. You slowly approached the boy and set the bowl of food down beside him. “I made some congee, so please eat it. I’d be sad if all my hard work went to waste.”

Genya gave you a small nod but didn’t make any attempts to say anything. In fact, he hasn’t said a word since coming to this room.

The first thing either of the boys did when you arrived was help tend to your wound. As luck would have it, you and Genya were both properly educated about first aid. Sanemi wasn’t completely unaware of what to do either, but his first aid was something you’d describe as street knowledge versus something you’d learn from a class.

After the wound was addressed, you had changed and washed your clothes in the sink in an attempt to prevent any blood from staining, but you lamented the loss of one of your favourite shirts regardless. Apparently while that was happening, Sanemi and Genya ended up having a pretty major argument. About what, you weren’t sure.

“You’re not hiding any major injuries, right Genya?” Again, no response. This time, you took a seat beside the boy and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Genya?”

You felt the young boy jump underneath your touch for a moment, but he quickly composed himself again. “S-sorry (Y/n)-san… I promise I’m not mad at you or ignoring you. I just think that right now… I think I need to be alone for a little bit. I won’t take too long though, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

You shook your head. “Not at all! I just wanted to make sure you’re alright.”

“Why?”

“Why?” You repeated. “Because you’re a good person, Genya. Considering everything that could’ve happened and comparing it to what did happen, I’d say you’re doing just fine.”

“But you got hurt!”

“So did you.”

“But it’s my fault that you-”

“I don’t think that anyone in this house is completely at fault for what happened today. There will always be ifs and what ifs about situations like this, but what’s important is that we learn from the things that have happened and keep moving on with our lives.”

Genya smiled softly for a moment, but the smile dropped from his lips just as quickly. “Do you think that Sanemi hates me now?”

This time it was your turn to flash the boy a smile. “I don’t think Sanemi could ever hate you.”

Just as quickly as you entered, you left Genya to his own devices. You paused as you reached for the door, but it was only for a moment.

As you once again entered the kitchen, you noticed that Sanemi had moved from his place in the living room and was now leaning against one of the kitchen counters. You wanted to laugh at how not slick he was, but decided to keep it to yourself.

“Feel free to have some congee. I’m not the greatest cook in the world, but I’ve been told that my congee could revive the dead.” You laughed to yourself as you took a bowl. “Well, it was either that or that my congee could kill a small rodent. Depends if you ask my mother or my father.”

“Where are your mom and dad?”

“They’re overseas.” You replied, keeping your eyes trained on your bowl of food. “My mom and dad are trying to expand their business together, but they felt that in order to make significant progress they’d have to work abroad. I could have went with them, of course, but I’m not a big fan of change.”

“How long have you been going at it alone?”

“Ever since I was about… ten? I guess that means it’s been a pretty long time, but it’s not like I never see them. They visit home at least once every two months.” You admitted. “Now what about you? What’s your parental situation at home like?”

You could hear Sanemi scoff, but when you looked up you were surprised to see him smiling. “You’re clever, I’ll give you that, but you’re also pretty stupid.”

“That’s not a very nice thing to say to a girl.”

“Look, it’s not that different from what that asshold said back in the alley. My dad’s a deadbeat and my mom works real damn hard to make sure food gets on the table every day. What more is there?”

“What more are you willing to tell me?”

Sanemi took a deep breath, letting the muscles in the young boy’s face relax. “To be honest, my old man’s a real shit show. About two years ago he went out to a bar and got into some deep shit. He ended up pissing off some real shady people and got himself killed. The dumbass couldn’t even go without making trouble for us, cause not even two days later those douchebags came round tellin us that we owed them money. Apparently our dad owed them a steep amount of cash. We were able to pay em back, but it took everything that our mom had saved up.”

“So you took a job to help make ends meet?” You inquired.

“Well yeah, obviously. I don’t give a shit about what happens to me, but the rest of my family? All of them have a bright future ahead, as long as I keep helping to support them. I don’t want my mom or my siblings worrying about me - especially not Genya. I feel like if they knew the kind of shit I got into, I’d only be making trouble for ‘em.”

“Who’s to say for sure? I mean, it’s pretty obvious that Genya looks up to you.”

“Yeah, and that’s the issue.” Sanemi admitted. “I see way too much of my old man in me to be a good role model. If push comes to shove and I end up the kind of scumbag he was, I don’t want my family to feel bad about telling me off.”

“No offence Sanemi, but you’re seriously delusional.”

Sanemi looked at you with wide eyes. Your tone was pretty harsh, but the look on your face was kind. It was such a stark contrast that the boy was left speechless.

“You talk as if turning into your father is inevitable. Personally, I disagree with that notion wholeheartedly since reality is not always cut and dry. Sure, you’re stubborn and hot headed, but that doesn’t make you a bad person - and certainly nothing like what you’ve told me your father is like. Without a shadow of a doubt, Sanemi, I believe that you’re a good person. Better yet, I believe that you are someone worth admiring. It’s not even my word you have to take for it, right Genya?”

You turned your head toward the hall and Sanemi’s gaze naturally followed. A moment later, Genya turned the corner.

“Is that true, Sanemi? Are you really that scared of turning out like dad?”

“Course I am! Our old man was nothing but a drunkard. I sure as hell don’t wanna end up like that piece of shit.”

“For what it’s worth, I don’t think you’re anything like dad was.” Genya admitted. “You’re strong, smart, naturally gifted at kendo and really good with animals! Nothing about you makes me think you’re like dad at all! If anything, you’re so amazing that I constantly wish that I could be more like you…”

“Don’t lie to me, Genya.”

“I would never lie about something like that!” The young boy reassured. “I wished to be like you so much that I literally became you. Shouldn’t that be enough proof for you?”

Wordlessly, Sanemi walked over to Genya. There was a moment in which Genya looked unsure of what was about to happen, but you didn’t worry. In fact, you weren’t even surprised when Sanemi leaned over and pulled Genya into an embrace.

“You really wanted to be like me that badly?” Sanemi scoffed. “You’re so fucking stupid sometimes.”

“I know.”

“But I love you anyway.”

“I know. I love you too.”

══════════════════

Epilogue

What is the turning point in which admiration turns to jealousy?

If someone could change themselves to be more akin to the person they admire, wouldn’t they?

Is it, after all, such a horrible thing to want to be like the person we admire? If jealousy is just a single misstep away from adoration, how can we be certain about which emotion we truly feel?

“Shinazugawa-senpai! I didn’t expect to see you here.”

“Don’t give me that crap, (Y/n). You know damn well I was invited to be here before you were.”

“Are you sure about that? Sometimes I think that Genya is becoming more fond of me than he is of you. Before either of us knows it, he might swap bodies with me.”

“Ugh. Don’t even joke about that shit. It was so…”

“Stressful?” You smiled teasingly. “Yes, I agree. Adolescence Syndrome is certainly something to be reckoned with.” Both you and Sanemi turned toward the center stage. The kendo exhibition would likely be starting soon. Still, a little small talk never hurt anyone.

“How have you been spending your time now that you’re no longer volunteering at the shelter?” Wondered Sanemi.

“Don’t tell me… does my senpai actually miss seeing me at work?”

“Shut up! And stop calling me your senpai! Just call me by my name.”

“You want me to keep calling you Shinazugawa-senpai?”

“You know what I mean.”

“Do I though?” The boy gave you a certain look and you laughed. “Okay, okay. Are you happy now, Sanemi?”

At your response, Sanemi rolled his eyes. The older boy could feel warmth beginning to gather in his cheeks, and he also noticed you staring at him. He knew if he teased you about staring you’d tease him right back, so he didn’t. In fact, those kinds of remarks weren’t usually his thing at all, but he always ends up saying way more than he means to when you’re around.

“In other news, I’m surprised that none of your other siblings came along today.”

“No way. Sumi begged me to bring her along, but she also keeps asking me when you’ll become her sister-in-law and I can only handle that kind of harassment for so long.”

“I think she’s charming.”

“That makes one of us…” Both you and Sanemi shared a short laugh. It wasn’t much, but Sanemi decided that he liked the way you laughed. “By the way, (Y/n)... are you free today?”

“I’m here now, aren’t I?”

“Just answer my question.”

You stifled a laugh before replying to the older boy. “Sorry, but unfortunately I’m not. I have a few errands to run and it looks like the weather might not hold out for too much longer. Apparently a pretty hefty storm is headed this way. There’s no way I wouldn’t want to be prepared for something like that, you know?”

“Oh right… of course.”

“Is something the matter, Sanemi?”

“No, course not! It’s nothing that you need to worry your pretty little head about.”

“Oh, so you think I’m pretty now?”

When Sanemi opened his mouth to reply, he couldn’t bring himself to tell the truth or to lie. Instead, he scoffed and let you have the satisfaction of catching him off guard.

As you and Sanemi continued to make small talk, the male couldn’t help but smile. He enjoyed watching the way you would talk with your hands when you fell deep into the conversation, and the way your eyes expressed your emotions so honestly. Even if the honesty in your eyes gave away your true feelings, Sanemi still loved talking to you. Hell, he enjoyed being around you in general, but he doubted that he’d ever tell you something as embarrassing as that.

Besides, he believed it’d be best that a guy like him admire a girl like you from afar.

#sanemi shinazugawa #kny sanemi #genya shinazugawa #kny genya #sanemi x reader #sanemi shinazugawa x reader #fluff #body swapping #body swap #alternate universe #high school au #modern au #adolescence syndrome #that one syndrome from Rascal Does Not Dream of Bunny Girl Senpai #Japanese honorifics #honorifics are used in this story #oneshot #connected oneshot #Memories of the Future

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