#svetlana core

[broknd0ll]

[milanson]

and although I don’t like winter, this atmosphere is incredible! I can’t even find the words to explain what exactly I like

Svetlana’s Dream

[hadesrise]

heart of gold, heart of cold.

summary ➳ you’re much more than just the nicest boy in southside chicago

pairings ➳ ian gallagher x male reader x mickey milkovich

warnings ➳ fluff, foul language, violence, soft boy!reader, homophobia, established polyamorous relationship, absolute badassery lol, mentions of sex, a little apathy, small mention of blood, good but actually not trope, some mental issues

author’s note ➳ haven’t watched shameless, only gallavich scenes and few other moments. my anger issues can’t handle watching all of that. which is why none of my writing of them’s gonna be accurate to the timeline of the series.

Ian and Mickey couldn’t remember the time you were ever mean to anyone even before meeting you, had never even heard of your name being thrown around without it being extremely positive. Everyone had to say everything about you, which is understandable, considering you were definitely the odd type to be in southside Chicago — this place was full of shit with robbery being nonchalantly committed, guns shooting off in different areas, bunch of unconvicted pedophiles walking around, and teenagers high on whatever fucking heavy drugs they first could touch, while you’re out there, helping whoever you think might need help and genuinely being nice to even the worst fucking thugs you would ever meet.

It’s questionable, how someone could be in southside and grow up perfectly sane and not bottled up with any issues or anger.

You’ve always been the talk around the neighborhood, how the (L/n) kid helped some randos again, how you talked to them with the nicest personality and utmost respect, how you smile at anyone who passes by whenever you make eye contact with them, how you were calm in dealing with a situation most people would get frustrated at; just about anything positive. It wasn’t difficult for both Ian and Mickey to fall for you as much as they fell for each other. You were like a single flower blooming in the middle of a garden that a person would come back to just to see your beauty; something about your softness and kind personality struck a core into both of their hearts.

They never had someone like you in their life. A calm, soothing, comforting presence, like the warm sun in the morning. An accepting, welcoming presence, like the mother earth. You’ve always been gentle with them — not something they’re used to, considering the type of household they grew up in — always checking in, making sure they’re okay even if they push you away, taking care of them.

You’re one of the first person Ian came out to other than his family, because he knew you’d never judge. Mickey was rather an asshole in your first meet, nearly beating you up, but the way you didn’t snark or your nice demeanor didn’t change no matter what insults he threw at you made him hesitant, which never happened with Milkovich’s.

When they started sleeping together, you caught on it quickly before anyone else ever did and kept it a secret the entire time, knowing the personal problems they had to deal with; Ian and Mickey only found out you knew when you stopped Terry from making Mickey have sex with Svetlana by just walking in on the interaction. The near innocence in your eyes as you tilted your head slightly to the side, just staring at Terry until he grew uncomfortable and rushed off. He could never stand being near to you, especially with how holier than thou you were. It wasn’t actually an accident to walk in, but they don’t know that.

Despite the awkward circumstances, you were calm and paid Svetlana a good amount before getting both of them dressed and taking care of them, even though they didn’t have to be taken cared of. Your gentleness with them that time really caused something to burst within their chest, the same feeling they were starting to develop towards each other. The acceptance, the comfort, the gentleness. Everything about you felt magical — you felt magical.

Even after Ian and Mickey figured out their shit together, officially came out, figured out their shit together again that both of them liked you, flirted with you and won you over, and officially came out again to their family as polyamorous couple, they had never seen you be a dick. Sure, you swore a lot sometimes when you drop something or miss something, but never towards anyone. They never saw you doing the typical southside thing, being rebellious, smoking cigarettes, drinking alcohol, doing drugs or shit.

You’re always nice — and it’s supposed to be a good thing, but it also gets a lot concerning, especially when some dumb fucking guy punched you in the face for mistaking you as someone who slept with his girlfriend and you had the audacity to forgive him when he apologized, making Mickey nearly wanting to strangle you right then and there.

“Why the fuck did you forgive him?” Mickey snarls and shuts the fridge door close, ice pack in hand as he throws it to Ian, who immediately began pressing it to your cheek that was beginning to form a bruise.

You shrugged, “He just mistook me for someone else.”

“Yeah, and fucking punched you in the face without asking first who the fuck you are.” Mickey retorted, giving you a death glare. He moves around to stand beside you on the opposite side of Ian.

You were sitting on the counter facing the dining table where Fiona, Lip, Liam, Carl, Debbie, Sandy, Mandy, and Franny were, all contorting worried look since you’re the nicest and you having a single bruise means when the people you helped before sees it they’re gonna flip over and bury the guy ten feet under while still breathing. Everyone knew you, and you’re literally the holiest within southside, so they naturally hated when someone messed with you.

Your hand shoots up to rub his arm gently, warm look in your eyes as your soft voice speaks to comfort him. “Calm down, Mick. Let it go, I’m fine.” You smile softly, “It was just a little mistake. Everyone makes mistakes.”

Mickey frowns, still angry yet definitely calm now that you’re giving him comfort. “You’re too fucking nice, it’s making me sick.”

You chuckled, grabbing the ice pack from Ian to press it on your cheek yourself. You pull Ian to kiss him on the cheek before doing the same to Mickey, knowing it will help tone down their anger. “At least I have my own guard dogs.” You joke, earning a snicker from the group.

“Haha, very funny.” Mickey sarcastically replies.

Ian sighs, “(Y/n), I think Mickey’s right though. You’re too nice, maybe a bit much. Even to Frank and Terry.” He agreed with his other boyfriend, who puts his hands up in a gesture of i told you so.

You tilted your head, still smiling. “Frank’s your father and Terry’s Mickey’s father. No matter how horrible they are, I don’t think I could treat them any differently from how I treat others.” Shrugging, you ignored both of your boyfriends’ groan and sipped on the orange juice resting on your side.

“What’s up with you treating everyone equally and being unnaturally nice to even someone who doesn’t deserve it?” Fiona asked, genuinely confused with her brows furrowed together and crease forming on her forehead. “You were even nice with Monica.”

You bit the inside of your cheek, thinking for a while.

You could tell them what was really going on, but it would be too much to dump it on them all of a sudden. Being nice and having a lot of patience is a lot difficult, but you learned to, otherwise you wouldn’t be able to survive. It’s a survival skill that you had to adapt to; be nice and you get everything you want. A little... useful tactic that you taught yourself, though it’s more than that.

Deciding against telling them, because it’ll get out when it gets out, you simply gave her a tight-lipped smile and shrugged. “I like spreading dumb kindness. I think it helps people who deals with mental health issues that their relatives probably don’t even know. I might’ve been nice to them and turned their bad day into good day. Small things like that has an impact, you know.”

Mickey scowled, “That makes no sense.”

You simply smiled and patted his cheek, turning to Ian who placed his hand on your waist. “I still think you should’ve done something, (Y/n). Press charges or something.” He said, wanting to convince you.

Shaking your head with a reassuring smile, you kissed his lips and Mickey’s, successfully shutting both of them up as you hopped off of the counter. “I’m going to change. Take me out on a date, will you two?” You let your hands linger on each of their arm before walking away with an angelic smile, leaving the boys staring after you in slight awe.

“Oh my god, you two are so fucking smitten with him.” Sandy remarked, laughing. The others nodded in agreement, deeply amused.

Ian and Mickey rolled their eyes, “The fuck we’re not.” Mickey denies, though failing to convince them and himself.

“But you are,” Lip shrugged. “He’s got you wrapped all around his finger.”

“Kinda cute if you ask me,” Fiona chuckles.

“Oh, fuck off.” Ian retorts, a smile across his face.

Neither would admit it, but they really were. Equally smitten with one another, your relationship had always been wholesome, except for the times all three of you were friends with benefits.

Ian and Mickey slept together first obviously, only started hooking up with you after the incident with Terry. Mickey was first to do it when he went to your house to spend time with you since you’re the only person he could trust aside from Ian, the casual conversation taking a turn after he had asked if you would fuck him if you were gay, which you told him you were, causing Mickey to literally demand a fuck from you.

“Hey, man?” Mickey slowly called to you who was sitting on the opposite side of the ridiculously big couch, eyes focused on the movie with a can of coke in your hand.

“Hm?” You hum, turning to look at him despite being completely indulged in the movie plot. Mickey liked that, how you’re willing to give him your full attention even though you’re busy and don’t even have to look at him at all.

He glances down, picking with his hand, slightly nervous. But he knew you wouldn’t judge, you never did. It was unlikely of him to feel this way, but Mickey couldn’t help it. Nearly unbearable to talk to someone as nice and caring as you yet can’t bring himself to stay away.

“Would you—would you fuck me if you were, you know, fucking gay?”

Your brows raised at the random question. Though it wasn’t difficult to realize it’s because of the previous gay scene in the movie you’re watching where the main characters made love to each other without it being censored and shit. “Well,” You started with a small smile adorning your face, “I don’t know if you knew but I’m actually gay, Milkovich.”

Mickey’s head snapped to your side, eyes wide. “Wait, what? Why the fuck didn’t you tell me? Or Ian?”

“You didn’t ask,” You simply shrugged. “I normally don’t go around announcing to everybody what my sexuality is. Kind of weird if I did that,” You joked, earning a glare from the Milkovich. “But honestly, I didn’t think it was something I had to tell you or Ian. I just let people guess or notice it on their own.”

“How the fuck do they even notice?" Mickey remarks, furrowing his brows. “I’ve literally never seen you with any guys or girls. Have you even hooked up with somebody?”

You chuckled, “Nope. Wasn’t really interested.”

“Damn,” Mickey gave you a weird look. It was so odd to see someone in southside not doing drugs or shit, let alone sleeping around with whoever they liked. He wasn’t used to it. Now, you feel like a fucking holy being or something. But then, Mickey realizes you never actually answered his question, so he repeated again. “You didn’t answer my fucking question, would you fuck me?”

You’re gay, so might as well shoot his shot. Can’t really miss this opportunity.

You stare at him, something glinting in your eyes that definitely wasn’t innocence. Your lips slowly formed a sly grin as you tilted your head. “What if I said yes? What are you gonna do?”

A smile appeared on Mickey’s lips, “Then fucking get on with it, (L/n).”

Conveniently, you were a switch so Mickey didn’t have to pretend he didn’t like having dick in his ass. He told Ian he slept with you that came off as surprise since apparently Ian also didn’t know you were gay, which led to Ian sleeping with you as well.

“You’re so weird,” Ian laughed when he caught you stacking some nuggets together to build a makeshift tower, having woken up from a friendly sleepover at your house.

You grinned and stacked the last piece of nugget, looking at Ian as you gestured to your work of art. “Tadaaaa!” It caused him to burst out laughing, sitting down beside you on the couch.

“What are you doing?” Ian asked between laughter.

You shrugged your shoulders, “I was bored and you weren’t waking up anytime soon. Figured I’d kill my time.” Smiling, you offered him a can of beer that was sitting on the table, having just taken out from the fridge. Ian accepted, thanking you. “How did you sleep?”

Ian smiled after taking a gulp from the beer and placed it down on the table, “Great, actually. Like the times I haven’t been able to sleep isn’t real.” Relief was evident on his face, considering how big the bags under his eyes were. He never mentioned that you were the reason of him being unable to fall asleep, always thinking of you ever since that horrible day that suddenly turned great with your presence. Hearing about you sleeping with Mickey made him decide nothing will happen if he just thinks around, thus the sleepover.

A soft look crosses your face as you begin to play with his hair, touch displaying gentleness Ian had never felt before. His eyes met yours, such a warm gaze making him feel loved even without doing anything. “Well, I’m glad the cuddle worked, Gallagher. You can always come to me when you can’t sleep, I’ll hold you until you can.” Voice merely above a whisper, you gently told him.

Ian was feeling breathless. Everything about your welcoming and accepting nature deemed temptation; his pupils dilating, throat suddenly dry as if he’s been dehydrated, stomach growling as if hasn’t eaten in days, feeling your soft hand brush through his ginger hair as you stared at him innocently yet almost seducing. The tension was too thick to be cut with a knife. And with the growing urge to just give in to the temptation, Ian leaned forward without a second thought, capturing your lips in a kiss.

You made a noise of surprise that immediately caused Ian to pull away, a panicked look in his eyes, scared he might’ve ruined the most precious friendship he’s ever had. Series of apology slipped past his lips, but you shut him up by putting a finger up to his lips.

“Don’t apologize, I’m not mad, silly.” You reassured, though concern plastered your face. “Are you sure you want this?”

“Yeah,” His response was nearly quick. “Why do you think I agreed to a sleepover?”

That angelic smile of yours returned again, chuckling. “Okay then, Gallagher. Do whatever you want.” You said before kissing him again, letting the rest of the day continue.

Again, it was convenient that you’re a switch, because even though Ian has tried bottoming before, he preferred topping, especially with you or Mickey. Well, you and Mickey now. Those sleeping around days were a lot... wild, to say the least.

You never slept with anyone besides Ian and Mickey, always uninterested in other guys and turning them down nicely quite often, which Mandy — your bestfriend — noticed.

Questionable, of course, because there was one incident at the Alibi where she, Lip, and Fiona were present and you and Ian came out the bathroom covered in hickeys, not even bothering to hide them as the two of you sat down with them. However, when a guy noticed and realized what happened, they attempted to shoot their shot with you, miserably failing as you turned it down without further acknowledgement while Ian just shrugged, as if he already knew that was going to be your answer. Then, Mickey suddenly barged in only to tell you a short “not tired yet, are ya?” while walking to the bathroom, and you smiled at Ian before following Mickey.

It happened quite a lot in different circumstances that even the Gallaghers caught up on how Ian and Mickey are the only ones you let getting in your pants.

It was a messy and complicated time where everyone had to deal with their own shit; Mickey with his homophobic upbringing and sexual crisis, Ian with his confusion in feeling something for both you and Mickey at the same time and doubts to himself, you with accepting your romantic attraction to both of them, keeping it locked in, and fulfilling the desire to be with them by sleeping with them. It’s either they slept with each other, you slept with either of them, or the three of you slept together, all bonded somehow. Ian and Mickey were the first ones to get their shit together and officially became partners, and well... it honestly didn’t turn out good back then due to you still dealing with your own shit that nobody ever noticed. That story could be for another day, though.

The point is, your friendship used to be wholesome, but the extent of it increased more when you three settled after all that shitshow. There were some toxicity at first, especially with Mickey struggling to overcome the genuinely awful upbringing he had — he was dating a guy after all, and not just one but two — along with Ian’s diagnosis of bipolar disorder. But having each other and not giving up on each other made the toxicity disappear and morph into something positive, each of you going through some relationship development together.

Compared to back then, the three of you had grown overly comfortable with each other and the polyamorous relationship you had, not feeling discomfort when people look at you weirdly. Coming to terms with the issues truly helped.

However, neither Ian nor Mickey had come to terms with your kindness towards people who didn’t deserve it, and they absolutely have no plans of coming to terms with it at all. People can be a lot rude and asshole when you’re nice to them, which is why they simultaneously keep themselves and each other from strangling the person’s neck everytime it treated or spoke to you horribly.

Well, frankly, nobody would understand and you don’t expect them to. Too bad they’re going to have to sooner than later, because you’ve been feeling a little irritable — it’s only a matter of time before the truth cracks through the surface of friendliness and nice personality you’ve plastered on.

Once it does, people will be fucked.

You know who you are when you’re not nice; it’s never a pretty sight. It’s a bloodbath.

Everything seemed perfect.

Dinner’s pretty cheap, but not unbearable. One of the nicest things about you is that you don’t care for the price as long as it’s edible and tasty. You’re not the one to fuss over the cheapness or expensiveness of anything and the Gallaghers loved that, because you wouldn’t talk shit of how they can’t afford shit. Birthdays are special occasion where people usually ask for expensive gifts, but the Gallaghers were always reminded by you not to go grand on celebrations or presents, because you didn’t like them spending their money on something other than theirselves.

They still went with it though, going to a cheap local bar where they serve cheap dinner so everyone could celebrate the birth date of you, who was born special in southside Chicago with kindness that’s seemingly a curse.

The night went by smoothly, everyone enjoying their time and having fun — You, Ian, Mickey, Mandy, Sandy, Lip, Fiona, Liam, Debbie, Franny, Veronica, Kev, and even Frank who was by the bar because his family disapproved of him joining. He still did, considering you’re the nicest kid he’s ever met.

Perfect. Everything was perfect. Too perfect that it’s becoming strange, how well this night is going.

You were absolutely correct to feel like that.

Mickey’s blood was boiling at the man that had suddenly approached the table with a friendly smile only to go around spitting whatever the fuck he wanted to talk about, mainly nasty things. But according to him, he knew you and you knew him, well enough, even though they didn’t know him despite being your boyfriends. The Gallaghers were collectively surprised of his sudden appearance, considering none of them knew him, but concerns littered their faces when the man mentioned you.

“I honestly don’t know what (Y/n)’s thinking, hanging out with Gallaghers and dating one,” The man, who ( unwantedly ) introduced himself as Caius snickered.

Ian, despite his annoyance increasing at Caius’ presence, tried to remain calm. “What’s it to you? And fyi, he’s also dating him, so don’t fucking talk like that.” He pointed at Mickey, who glared daggers at the man.

“Fuck, he’s dating two guys?” Caius laughed mockingly. “And a Milkovich at that. But aren’t you, like, bipolar though? With the gene.” His mention of the diagnosis made Mickey furious as he slammed his hands against the table and attempted to stand up, only to be held back by Ian. Everyone had their blood boiling now, but forced themselves to keep calm since it’s your birthday. Nobody wanted to ruin it for you.

“I guess crazy psychopaths are his type, huh? With how the screws in his head are fucking loose, I’m not surprised.” He snarled, looking at both of them. However, his words cuts through the boiling rage within Ian and Mickey as they both processed his words, furrowing their brows in confusion at the mention of the screws in your head being loose.

Before anyone could utter a single word, the loud sound of wine bottle smashing against the back of Caius’ head erupts throughout the entire bar as he dropped to the floor cursing loudly, revealing you holding the remaining end of the shattered bottle. The nice look on your face no longer visible as it contorted into an emotionless expression, eyes holding utmost coldness with some unknown darkness within them that sent chills up everyone’s spine.

You merely acknowledged Caius groaning in pain on the floor, throwing away the shattered piece of the wine bottle to the side as you nonchalantly patted off your hands of any invisible dirt.

“Oh my fucking god,” Fiona was the first to react, terrified as she witnessed Caius touch the back of his head and get a blood on his palm. The other Gallaghers were already standing a feet away as they all jumped up and away from the table when you smashed a bottle on the man’s head, completely shocked and stunned, Lip and Carl letting out holy fuck.

“Jesus fucking Christ!”

“What the fuck did you just do?”

Ian and Mickey exclaimed in sync, with Ian looking at you while Mickey at Caius, both eyes wide and shock on their faces.

You shrugged, the usual smile completely nonexistent. “Smashed a bottle on an old friend’s head after talking shit about my boyfriends.” The slightest hint of apathy in your tone worried them a bit, but you quickly shifted your cold gaze to Caius. “Quit fucking moaning, Caius. You already saw it coming when you decided to approach them while I was gone for the bathroom.”

“Fuck,” Caius groaned, laying on his back to shoot you a glare. “I just got fucking discharged from the hospital you put me in, shithead. A little nice sympathy maybe? The one you fucking show people.”

“Certainly didn’t need sympathy when you brought up Ian’s bipolar disorder,” You smiled sarcastically. “And don’t be fucking dramatic, it was just few broken bones.”

“You made me fucking bleed internally and you wanna call that just a few broken bones?” Caius snapped. Everyone’s eyes widened.

Rolling your eyes, you folded the sleeves up of your button up while clenching and unclenching your fist, something that Ian and Mickey didn’t miss. “Serves you right for planning to shoot Micky Milkovich. Unfortunately for you, I genuinely and utterly loathe someone describing either of them as crazy psychopaths, especially since Ian’s been diagnosed bipolar, so...”

You grinned sadistically.

“Consider today your finally meet God and be sent to Hell day.”

Everyone watched as you rub your face while talking to the cops about what happened inside the bar, the back of your hand all bloody and knuckles busted, probably tainted in both Caius’ and your own blood. It was scary to see you so violent and, as Caius said, have screws in the head loose. The unlikeliness and the way you acted and looked so different from how you usually were terrified them.

Not Ian and Mickey, though. They were standing on both of your sides while the rest were a few feet behind, still attempting to calm down from the shock of witnessing your change in attitude and your true colors seeping through the cracks.

Your entire demeanor now was back to normal; not that cold and expressionless presence with terrifying apathy, but the warm, full of expression and accepting presence. You had quietly greeted the cops earlier with a small smile that turned into a frown of guilt, which somehow was enough for them not to handcuff you despite the damage you caused on Caius.

“I probably shouldn’t have done all of those to him,” You muttered thoughtfully while biting your lip. “I don’t think I regret it though. He crossed the line, I got pissed.”

“You normally don’t get pissed, Mr. (L/n).” One of the cops remarked.

Shrugging your shoulders, you gave them a small smile. “That’s just what you think of me. I don’t really care if people insult me or talk shit about me, but my boyfriends are one of the most significant people in my life, so they’re off-limits. I really can’t handle anyone talking shit about them.” Your soft tone falling down to a serious and firm one, you narrowed your eyes at the ambulance that contained Caius’ unconscious body.

“Are Mr. Milkovich and Mr. Gallagher basically your trigger?” The other cop wondered.

You nodded immediately, “Yeah. I think so.” Rubbing your nape with the uninjured hand nervously, you bit the inside of your cheek. “Shouldn’t you be handcuffing me? I definitely went too far, I blacked out in anger, and he’s unconscious with some injuries that are probably worse than what I think, so…” You slowly brought your hands together, ready to get arrested.

“Don’t worry, witnesses came forward and shared what happened. They confirmed Caius went too far with the disclosure of a person’s medical condition confidentiality.” One of the officers stated, gently bringing your hands down.

Your eyes snapped to the cops, “Wait, really?”

“Yes, they understood how off-limits your boyfriends are and immediately talked to us after we arrived.” The two cops smiled, seeing the look of relief on your face. “We’ll get going then, Mr. (L/n). You have nothing to worry about.”

“Thank you.” Sighing in relief, you gave them a look of gratitude as they began getting into their car before your blank face returned.

“You’re fucking one hell of an actor, (Y/n) (L/n).” Mickey remarked after seeing your face fall and glare threateningly at the ambulance as soon as the cops drove off.

“Hey,” Ian softly called to catch your attention, cupping your face. “Look at me. Look at us. Calm down, (Y/n). It’s fine, we’re fine, okay? You don’t have to be mad anymore.”

Mickey watched silently from the side with his arm around Ian’s waist and the other hand gently rubbing your arm to help bring comfort to you. Tense shoulders slowly softening and body relaxing, they witnessed the rage storm calm in your eyes as the hard gaze softened and you respond to their gesture by melting into their touch.

You sighed deeply, “Okay.”

Both of them couldn’t help but notice the empathy slipping back into your eyes and expression, brightening it up, making it seem more alive. Your eyes looked dead earlier when you were beating the life out of Caius until he was barely breathing, it honestly scared and freaked the fuck out of your boyfriends, even though they would probably never admit it. It was like seeing a soulless person because of the lack of empathy and all.

Though, seeing that happen definitely made them reconsider the thought that you grew up perfectly sane without bottled up issues in southside Chicago — They didn’t realize the bottled up issues was simply your kindness and nice atittude, the main things that literally allows you to get whatever you want from anyone because it’s the easiest way to manipulate others into giving you what you want, and they wouldn’t even realize the manipulation.

That’s your own shit to deal with; you force yourself to be nice and caring, so your apathy wouldn’t come up to the surface and destroy things. However, Ian and Mickey somehow knew none of the nice or caring side you showed to them were fake. Because if they were, would you even be in a relationship with them?

It would probably take a lot of time to figure you out, especially when you seem to like hiding behind the nicest person in southside Chicago mask and never let the surface crack to get even a peek inside, but they were willing to try. You’re their boyfriend after all.

“We’ll figure it out, (Y/n).” Mickey gently says. “We always fucking do. Right, Gallagher?” He smirked at Ian, who instantly nodded with an of course, before Mickey grabbed the back of his head and kissed his lips.

You smiled at them, genuinely.

© ᴀʟʟ ʀɪɢʜᴛs ʀᴇsᴇʀᴠᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ʜᴀᴅᴇsʀɪsᴇ. sᴛᴇᴀʟɪɴɢ, ᴘʟᴀɢɪᴀʀɪᴢɪɴɢ, ᴏʀ ᴜsɪɴɢ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋs ғᴏʀ ᴍᴏɴᴇᴛᴀʀʏ ɢᴀɪɴ ɪs sᴛʀɪᴄᴛʟʏ ᴘʀᴏʜɪʙɪᴛᴇᴅ. ᴀsᴋ ᴘᴇʀᴍɪssɪᴏɴ ʙᴇғᴏʀᴇ ʀᴇᴘᴏsᴛɪɴɢ ᴏʀ ᴛʀᴀɴsʟᴀᴛɪɴɢ.

[sakuralovespossums]

okok so im not the person that asked if u take requests BUT may i pretty pls request hcs for master shake x someone who's like.. the opposite of him??? could be gn but preferably fem 😭 my idea is like.. reader is soft spoken, actually cares about meatwad, pretty darn feminine..... yk u get the gist. ty vro currently under hurricane watch 😛

Human Master Shake x Fem Reader who’s his total opposite!

General HCs

When Shake went around bragging about his new girlfriend, everyone just thought he was lying like usual and ignored him. That is until they actually met you and HOLLY HELL how tf did Shake of all people manage to pull a sweetie like you?!

You’re kind, soft spoken, bubbly and always dressed in pastel colored feminine clothing and glittery makeup. You always know just what to say and easily make friends with anybody you meet

Then there’s Shake…who’s…….Shake

He acts all surprised and offended to see people act shocked when finding out you two are together

“Of course we’re together!! You think I wouldn’t be able to hit this sweet piece of cake?”

*Smacks your ass, causing you to jump and glare at him*

Deep down tho, he’s REALLY kinda insecure about your relationship and is worried your only dating him cuz you want something from him and will ditch him at any moment

It doesn’t help that he has a shitty track record with women Svetlana and Freda

But you get that and are pretty patient. So you take your time with him and try to get him to slowly open up and be more vulnerable around you when you guys are alone. Wether that’d be cooking together, running errands, cuddling on the bed, and other mundane stuff

Shake acts annoyed and bored by all this at first, but over time begins to secretly enjoy it and feels more comfortable being with you

Like he’s shocked he doesn’t just like you for your sweet tits and ass!! He now actively seeks you out all the time cuz you’re the only person who makes him feel……..relaxed? Content? He doesn’t get it but he also can’t get enough of it!

Because of this, Shake grows more possessive/jealous. He will glare at anybody who looks at you and will snatch you away when your talking too long to other people

Doesn’t care who they are, he will let them known that you. are. HIS!!!!!

He feels justified in his possessiveness tho with how naive and too trusting you can be towards other people, making you easy prey for creeps who wanna take advantage of your kindness and good looks I kinda modeled your personality after Girlfriend from Friday Night Funkin

Despite being a bit of an airhead, there are random moments where you just say the most out of nowhere intelligent stuff ever that leaves everyone (especially Frylock) stumped

Despite liking you, Shake is still an asshole and can say/do some pretty dick-ish things to you sometimes. You quickly beat his ass reprimand him for it. You’re patient but not a pushover!!!

Shake groans as you drag him along on your usual shopping sprees, carrying home bags of new clothes and makeup from Forever 21, Victoria’s Secret, and Sephora. Meanwhile he’s blushing so hard cuz HOLY SHIT YOUR HOLDING HIS HAND!!!!!!

Peeks under your short skirt whenever he can

You know that 13-in-one shampoo bottle meme? That’s you and Shake

Your aesthetic is like NewJeans, Marina,pink core y2k (you) clashed with ICP, rap rock, horror core (Shake) I don’t know any other bands besides ICP I’m so sorry!

He smells (slightly) less after you forced him to start using hygiene products

He ALWAYS has you on his lap. Wether it’s the bed, couch, Carl’s pool, doesn’t matter

You love cuddling on his lap when he’s watching TV on the sofa, kissing all over his neck and face as he grows redder and redder

Other times he’ll get you back by suddenly ducking down and straight up tongue wrestle you with a sick smirk. His large frame not letting you go anywhere

Sure, you’ll often tease and fluster him. But he’ll also show you your place and leave you a mess too ;)

One time, he took you to an ICP concert and you were both decked out in the whole goth rocker outfit like in the Juggalo episode. God, he couldn’t believe how sexy you looked going from pretty pink to hardcore goth!

Shake cooks for you often after you compliment his meals. It fills him with a type of pride he doesn’t feel from telling others his usual made up stories

You like to hug him from behind as he stirs a pot on the stove, wearing the cute pink apron you insisted he wear he’s such a housewife

Shake still acts bored and annoyed when you try to be soft with him, but you get that that’s just how he is and go along with it while teasing him

He just grumbles into your chest. When Meatwad mentions how soft he gets around you, Shake just chases him with a bat

Shake is noticeably more mellow when you’re around. But that’s only when you around. Once you leave, he goes right back to being an ass to his roommates and neighbor. Please have him move out and live with you already!!!

Relationship with other characters

You and Meatwad instantly get along!

You guys always play together in his room with his dolls. You even gave him some of your old ones, which he loved so much!! Meanwhile Shake glares from the corner

He always goes to you for questions when Frylock is too busy only to be scared off by Shake, much to your frustration

You even exchanged phone numbers so that he can call/text you whenever he needs someone to talk to Shake has deleted his number off your phone numerous times and stopped when you confronted him about it. Now he just breaks Meatwad’s phone

Whenever Shake bullies Meatwad, he threatens him that he’ll tell him on you which instantly makes him panic

Frylock was skeptical when first meeting you. Did Shake pay you to act like his girlfriend? No, not even money could make someone pretend to like Shake. Did he brainwash you with one of his devices?

Regardless, he soon came to appreciate your company and is just glad there’s finally another sensible adult around here besides him!

He’s also appreciative of you for making his life less stressful by keeping Shake in check and being a friend/guardian figure to Meatwad

You like checking out whatever new invention he’s working on and even test some out (as super dangerous as that is)

Sometimes you both stand by the front porch and make chit chat while watching Shake and Meatwad annoy Carl

Oh yeah, Carl……

This greasy ass man is always hitting on you, no matter how many times you tell him you have 0 interest and are already taken

After a while, you become…….not friends but…..acquaintances is the right word. He still hits on you bcuz it’s Carl

“So I just got my pool decked out and it’s uhh….pretty hot out. Was wonderin if…maybe you know….you wanna stop by for a swim in your uhh….favorite bikini. Maybe like the smallest pair ya got………really shows off your boobs and—

*Gets blown up. You turn around to see Shake holding a bazooka*

NSFW stuff

Listen, listen!! I know we all like to imagine Shake as a pathetic attention whore sub!! BUT I also like to imagine him as a selfish dom with a size kink and fat dick that he doesn’t know how to use lmao

You’re just so smol and soft, he can’t help it!!!

He can’t get over how your strawberry scent always lingers on his skin, your soft voice, the way your back arches……..aw shit, did he bust already?

Gets a boner just from smelling your perfume scent

You’re both whiny brats crying for attention. You for his cuddles and dick. Him for your praises

Like I said in my last Shake x Reader fic, he burned all your toys!!! You didn’t talk to him for a week after that, which left him SO upset!!

Frylock: notices your bite marks “Oh my god, y/n!! Did a wolf attack you?!”

You: “Hmm? Oh, that’s just Shake!”

Fun Fact: Shake’s jizz tastes like pistachio milkshake

[thebearme]

OH WAIT MY DUMBASS FORGOT TO ALSO ASK BTW IF YOU HAVE ANY HEADCANONS ON CAMERON OR GWEN

Imma just gonna start with Cam first, and let me just tell you Cameron I projected the most on because even after my "ihatehim no ilovehim" phase so idk maybe some of this could be out of character srry.

I imagine Cameron is south African, particularly Zimbabwean.

His a walking nerd emoji.

The only pass time Cam had was to draw bugs. So he's REALLY GOOD at drawing bugs. Only bugs. Everything else looks like it's from the diary of a wimpy kid.

Cam not that keen of physical touch but slowly getting used to it cuz of Mike. Mike also trying to remember that everyone is open on surprise hugs.

Idk why but with Zoey and Cam's relationship I just think of Carly and Freddie but without the crush.

Gwen and Cam would have art trades together.

Cam got the dryess hands in existence because of the amount of hand sanitizer he uses. OCD GAND RISE UP!

Im saying this now but Cam and B would TOTALLY VIBE TOGETHER!! i just don't know their intentions are yet so dont ask..

Lightning and Cam would have hangout if not for the cheating thing.

Duncan once asked Cam if he can draw a mural of his pet spider Scruffy.

Sam would take it as his personal duty to teach Cam in the way of being a gamer. By teaching him the Zelda timeline and the lore of FNAF. May god rest Cam soul after that.

Cam doesn't not do well with the more active people in Mike's system like Svetlana and Manitoba. They try to be gentle with him but they just don't know their strengths and Manitoba canonically eats dirt so there's only so much they can hangout.

Vito doesn't vibe with nerds but he does occasional try to back him up if he's getting bullied. ONLY if Vito himself isn't bullying Cam.

Cameron actually has the best relationship with Chester. He loves hearing history and old facts and Chester loves the excuse to chat someone's ears off.

Mal and Cam have more of a neutral relationship with each other but I can definitely see Mal thinking his just some weakling nerd until Cam shows him he knows how to make the Demon core.

Cam and Mike started a hate Scott club. Although Cam feels alil bad about, he tends to be reminded of why they started this club every time they go back to their cabin.

Cam once witnessed Scott use the bathroom without washing his hands. And never liked him since.

There was one time between season, Mike, Cam and Zoey were going on a little road trip. Z & M both ask what song should they play next? Cam said he doesn't know any songs so maybe just play the Ice cream truck theme. And that's when they find out HOW sheltered this boy is.

I would get into the nitty gritty but Cam's mom is NOT a good mom. Zoey and Mike have beef with her (Zoey trys to have the benefit of the doubt and said she just too over protective while Mike legit DONT like her.)

They both make sure that Cam gets as much outside time as possible and learn to have a life outside of his house.

When Cam goes to college is going aboard as an entomologist.

When Cameron first came on TD he didn't know what to wear because obviously he's never been outside so it a mixture of hot and cold clothes. Bro don't know fashion but it's his outfit changes in All Stars.

He's wearing a puffer jacket because it reminds him of a sleeping bag and makes him cozy + it has a cooling system inside thanks to B.

[ilsolefiesta]

my natal chart & heterochromia theory

firstly, I would like to emphasize that this is only a hypothesis of mine and it needs a lot more evidence to support it. 

despite heterochromia being a rare phenomenon, I happen to know two people who have it - my mother and my best friend. both of them have Sagittarius Sun, but I think this is just a coincidence. because of this, I became interested in some patterns that could potentially indicate different eye colors.

it's also important to note that here I consider cases of full or partial coloration as "heterochromia". I don't include situations where people have slightly noticeable tone differences or perhaps color veins. also here I'm speaking about genetic heterochromia, not acquired one.

there are many different approaches to the question of identifying the significator of the eyes in astrology. some people say that the Sun represents the right eye for men and the Moon represents the left eye, while the opposite is true for women. some people mention Saturn and Venus.

however, I have a different theory.

in medical astrology the head and eyes in particular are associated with Aries. therefore, I believe that we need to deal with Mars. I also consider the Sun, as its exaltation is in Aries as well. 

to summarize. according to my hypothesis, we have Aries, Mars, and the Sun responsible for the eyes.

next, we need to identify the possible reasons of "corruption". my assumption is as follows: 

1. Chiron, as it refers to oxymoron and contradiction of opposites.

2. Uranus, as it refers to something unexpected and strange.

3. Lilith, as it can provide some specific features, but only if it's involved in some significant and accurate aspects or placed in the 1st house. 

we are now done with the theoretical part. then, I analyzed the natal charts of various celebrities with heterochromia. here are some observations:

`1. Kate Bosworth

damn, her Capricorn Sun, Venus and Lilith… so old-money cored appearance, I admire. her Aquarius Mars in square with Taurus Chiron is interesting, because Air Mars often gives blue/grey eyes, but we have a brown (earth) sector in this case...

2. Josh Henderson

honestly, his heterochromia is a little bit questionable for me and it took me around 20 minutes to observe it in his photos and videos. in some photos and videos, his eyes have the same grey/light blue color, while in others, he has such a green eye that I even wondered if it was Photoshop. however, according to the Internet, he was born with this trait, so we can consider it a common knowledge. his Virgo Mars is squared with Sagittarius Lilith and Scorpio Uranus, and there is also a conjunction between Lilith and Uranus.

3. Alice Eve

another beauty with Capricorn Venus, I begin to think that I have something personal with them… in this case, the situation is more clear. we have an active Aquarius Sun in square with Taurus Chiron (once again). additionally, her Sagittarius Lilith forms sextiles with the Sun and Libra Mars.

4. Jane Seymour

do any James Bond fans out there? because next we have actress who played his love interest. another Aquarius Sun - Capricorn Chiron sextile, + Pisces Mars square Gemini Lilith. her light eye, by the way, have a slight green accent. maybe it's because of the Pisces influence...

5. Mila Kunis

she was so good in "Black Swan"! there is really something magnetic in her appearance. Leo Mars sextile Gemini Chiron. additional influence of Leo Sun-Aquarius Lilith.

6. Dominic Sherwood

another Sun Aquarius. probably it also has some effect... Capricorn Mars-Uranus conjunction. it's secondary, but Cancer Chiron has a trine Scorpio Lilith and opposition with his Uranus.

7. Henry Cavill

the sexiest Superman in the house (however, he is absolutely not my type, haha). conjunction of Mars and Chiron in Taurus. that's all for him but this was enough for his heterochromia.

8. Svetlana Ivanova

omg, I'm obsessed with here face. the combination of Libra Sun and Virgo Venus makes her images so... pure, angelic? her Virgo Mars is squared by Gemini Chiron and Sagittarius Uranus. + Mars sextile with Taurus Lilith.

9. Elizabeth Berkley

fire combo. Aries Chiron in a trine with Leo Mars. Mars is also squared by Scorpio Lilith. and, finally, there is also a sextile between Mars and Libra Uranus.

last random fun fact about celebrities:

I also had Sarah McDaniel on my list of celebrities with heterochromia. she has such a unique difference - one eye is completely brown and one is completely blue. but when I checked her chart I find nothing. I was puzzled and at one point, I thought about giving up on writing this post. but then, I decided to do some more research about her. and surprise-surprise - her father revealed the truth by showing a childhood photo of her with both eyes the same brown color.

as for my mother, she has Sagittarius Sun sextile Aquarius Lilith & Scorpio Uranus. her Aries Chiron has no aspects to Mars, BUT it squares her 1st house Saturn. her eyes are green, but a half of one eye is blue. my best friend has 1st house Sagittarius Sun-Lilith conjunction, Sagittarius Chiron-ASC conjunction and Aquarius Mars-Uranus conjunction. her eyes are similar to Kate Bosworth's - light-blue/grey with brown part. that's why I can add that the connection of Chiron/Uranus and sometimes Lilith with the 1st house, ASC in particular or even the ruler of the 1st house also makes sense! (don't forget that Aries is the symbolic ruler of the 1st house). it's hard to trace it in celebrities' charts as I don't have information about when they were born, but I guess it's possible to find this connection either.

that's how it is. huh, it was hard to write and search. Thank you for reading!

I would also appreciate if you could share your thoughts on this topic. Perhaps you or someone you know has heterochromia, and could provide more evidence to support or deny my theory.

Pictures credits: Pinterest

[the-muppets-present]

The Muppets Present: Chess the Musical

Chess the Musical is an underrated gem, and we absolutely love it. The concert version, considered by most to be the definitive version, can be found on youtube in this playlist, which has nearly the entire complete concert (part 12 has been removed, but the only song missing is "The Deal (No Deal)") and I highly recommend you give it a listen, because the music is honestly top tier. The concert version is what we will be referencing here, since all the various stage versions are so different from each other (this show really suffered from over workshopping). If you're new here, take a moment to review our rules for casting. NOW, onto the show.

The Show

Chess the Musical is the story of the chess world championship tournament in 1979. The cold war is raging, and the two world champions are from the US and Soviet Union respectively. The story focuses on these two players and their personal lives and dramas set against the backdrop of the political strife between the east and west, as they are unwillingly used as pawns in the conflict.

The show has a core cast of seven characters and an ensemble with a few interesting standouts who can be filled out by muppets and humans alike. These are the key players:

Anatoly Sergievsky - "The Russian": The champion from Soviet Russia—a troubled husband and father who despises the propaganda and politics of the tournament.

Freddie Trumper -"The American": The champion from the United States—a self-absorbed, fame-and-fortune-seeking, short-tempered bad boy.

Florence Vassy - Freddie's strong-willed second and possible paramour, who is strained by Freddie's brashness and begins to feel a pull towards Anatoly as the tournament progresses.

Alexander Molokov - Anatoly's conniving second who is also a manipulative KGB agent and a major force in the political games being played behind the scenes.

Walter - A financial administrator in Freddie's delegation and in some versions a secret CIA agent who serves as a political counterpart to Molokov.

The Arbiter - The coldly objective, no-nonsense referee of the championship tournament and also the president of the International Chess Federation. He is essentially the narrator, the Voice of the chorus.

Svetlana Sergievskaya - Anatoly's estranged wife who, under Molokov's machinations, must persuade Anatoly to return to his homeland and family in the second act.

The Cast

Anatoly = Kermit. Kermit usually isn't the protagonist in Muppet adaptations, because the type of character he is just doesn't fit that role as neatly, but he's the perfect fit for Anatoly. Anatoly is competent in his own work, but is really out of his depth in the situation at large, and struggles to be true to himself amidst what he feels to be his duty. An arc that Kermit himself has played out in many a muppet film. Really, the only muppet who could adequately pull Anatoly off is Kermit himself.

Freddie = Gonzo. Freddie is bombastic, abrasive, quick to speak and slow to apologize, and overall extremely selfish. He walks into a room and his personality demands the spotlight immediately. I don't think I really need to give any other reasons why Gonzo should play this character, but I'll give one anyway: imagine Gonzo banging out "One Night in Bangkok" with Camilla and the Hens as the backup singers bawking out the chorus.

Florence = Miss Piggy. Yes, she's the only female muppet of note (who can speak english, sorry Henrietta), but also she'd genuinely be a good Florence. Florence is driven, a strong independent woman who don't need no man, but that doesn't mean she don't want one, and the fact that Anatoly is played by Kermit....well, you see where I'm going with this. Also, she and Freddie have an increasingly antagonistic relationship through the show that would be great to watch with Miss Piggy and Gonzo. Again, imagine her singing "The Model of Decorum and Tranquility" and getting more and more frustrated and gravelly in her delivery. And don't forget to picture Kermit in place of Josh Groben in that scene too...again, the dynamics are top tier here.

Svetlana = Miss Piggy. I'm invoking rule 5, not only because again, the lack of other english speaking female muppets, but because I love the idea of two Miss Piggies both singing for Kermit's attention and lamenting that he'll never see her the way she sees him, that his attention will always go to his work first. "I Know Him So Well" is a duet between the two women about Anatoly, and imagine two Miss Piggies singing this in duet with each other, each knowing that the other has something to offer that she doesn't have, but also knowing that even that isn't enough, that Anatoly (Kermit) will never be able to commit to her the way she wants to to him.

Molokov = Uncle Deadly. Honestly I don't have a lot to say about this choice, it's just Perfect. Molokov already borders on cartoonishly evil, he is an immediately untrustworthy character and everyone knows it, he's the world's worst spy. Uncle Deadly is a shoe in for the role and I'll hear nothing else about it. (Also, while generally irrelevant in casting muppets in a musical, since you can re-key as needed, Uncle Deadly already fits Molokov's voice type)

Walter = Sam the Eagle. While Walter is not as overtly patriotic as Sam, in adaptation, there should be a muppet who is equally as enthusiastic for his country as Molokov is for the Soviet Union. Walter is in some ways the least emotionally complex character aside from the Arbiter, he exists to serve the plot and the ways the plot creates character conflict for Anatoly, Freddie, and Florence, so Sam (who is generally a one note patriot character) fits the role nicely. Also, just like Uncle Deadly, he fits the voice type perfectly.

The Arbiter = Daniel Craig. I call upon the power of the One Human Celebrity. Daniel Craig would be perfect for a muppet adaptation of The Arbiter, he is the type of human actor who could be surrounded by muppets and you'd 100% believe it. The Arbiter's songs require some gusto, but Craig can carry a tune and if you give him a vocal coach and 6 weeks (and re-key his solo), I think he'd be great. However, this casting ONLY works if there are NO OTHER HUMANS in the chess federation. Daniel Craig must be surrounded by muppets at all time. Just look at his solo, and tell me that it wouldn't be the best thing ever to watch Daniel Craig do this while flanked by dancing muppets.

Additional Bit Parts:

Statler and Waldorf as The Consulate. When Kermit's Anatoly is speaking to them about defecting to the UK, imagine them having this exchange. You could either rewrite the song to be a duet OR have two Statlers and two Waldorfs to fill out the quartet.

Non-Celebrity Human as The Soviet Machine. This must be a big, nondescript burly man who can sing one glorious falsetto note. He must stand stoically as evil muppets dance around and sing the Soviet Machine. Moopets can fill out the Soviet chorus line.

The Ensemble: Merano and Bangkok both have human backup dancers and chorus members as well as muppet, because these are location setting songs, and you want to establish that humans are here in this world. Mike Tyson can have a celebrity cameo in Bangkok for old time's sake.

Chess Dancers: the Hens and the Penguins supplement the human chess dancers that take stage during the two chess matches.

Reporters: a mix of humans and muppets, but no cameos during this scene, it's Gonzo's first big solo and the spotlight needs to be on him.

Fozzie Bear as the governer of Merano and as an authority figure in Bangkok: his presence in Bangkok is commented on and he loudly says "Oh no, you must be thinking of my brother!"

And that's The Muppets Present: Chess the Musical!

What other celebrity cameos would you add to the show? We'd love to read your thoughts! Also let us know if you have another musical or movie you'd like to see a muppet fancast of, we love doing these!

[zoke-coke]

Okay here’s some emo band au shit. There are multiple bands, as the total drama part of the au itself is a battle of the bands competition. We got

BANDS:

The Drama Brothers

The one canon band. They’re a combination of every boy band—nonfiction AND fiction—ever. Consists of the same four (+ Sasquatchanakwa) as in the show.

System Flowers

I know I always call them “the emo band”, but they’re not really one set subculture. I mean, Duncan’s punk, Alejandro’s emo, Mal’s a metalhead, and Zoey’s goth at her core, but if you asked me to list their songs I’d give you an MCR album. Which makes me wonder, if they’re this universe’s MCR, does Twilight exist? Does 50 Shades exist? Does After exist, but as Drama Brothers? Anyway, their #1 rival band is the Drama Brothers. They also all kiss sometimes. They consist of:

Zoey - lead vocalist, can not play an instrument (represented in logo as a pink violet)

Mike (Mal/Svetlana) - guitar and bassist AND stunt artist (Svetlana) (represented in logo as a blue forget me not)

Duncan - drummer (represented in logo as a green button pom)

Heather - manager/keys (represented in logo as a white……..heather)

Alejandro - guitarist and vocalist (represented in logo as a red rose) (added to the band as competition to Justin)

Prime Time Lobotomy

Dark folk band composed of loons (affectionate and serious). Occasionally, they have screamo-like vocals with their fairy folk instrumentals. They’re probably all sapphics but I won’t say who dates who. The women:

Dawn - lead vocalist, but plays the flute when not singing.

Izzy - fiddle player, constantly tries to convince Dawn to let her yodel in the middle of random songs. She says she IS the lobotomy in the band name.

Jo - acoustic guitar. She was a last minute addition, but was convinced by Dawn. She said her soul needed some fun.

Eva - hand drums, or anything she can bang on.

SOLOISTS:

Courtney

Courtney was a ghostwriter who wrote music for various artists, who after her teenage years put out her own songs on YouTube and became an internet singer. She eventually became a big pop star, and that’s where she’s at now. I’d say she’s like… this universe’s Taylor? But I don’t know if I CAN say that

Gwen

True goth girl. She writes on her own, but doesn’t really put any music out; she was accepted into the battle of the bands through a random raffle. Princess Charm School style. The first friend she really makes in this whole thing is Courtney. Courtney finds her weird, but… charming.

José

Before Alejandro joined System Flowers, he was in a duo music act with his brother. While their act was extremely successful, it was obvious José was the favorite and he knew it. He’d constantly put Alejandro down and take any spotlight he had. One performance Alejandro has enough of his bullshit and they have a very violent split, and he joins this competition as a way to get back at him.

HOSTS:

Geoff and Bridgette

They’re married :) talk show hosts, a lot easier to talk to than Chris.

Chris McLean.

The main host. Put the show on to not give popularity to others, but to gain it himself. He was a one hit wonder years ago, for “I Wanna Be Famous”.

Yeah that’s it 👍 uhhhh oh yeah to clear up any confusion the contestants are all in their 20s, out of college. And it’s kinda just gen 1 and gen 2 cast. For now

[skaldish]

sorry for the incovinience, but I read this, and as neurodivergent medical student I'm very curious. Do you have any resources or recommend (websites,books,etc) about neurodiversity from a neurology,psychiatry pov? (especially from a neurodivergent health professional or science expert) Because it so hard to found those (mainly bc the missinformation and ableism), most books in my college's library are not updated :(.

not to mention some doctors have said some wild ableist shit (and even some medical students) :(

I don't have much, but I have directions I can point you towards. (I need to update it, but any sources I do find generally go on my brain blog @prefrontal-bastard.)

First, I highly reccomend the Neuroclastic website for autistic perspectives. This website is by and for autistic folks and features a multitude of people with different expertise and backgrounds, including scientists. I imagine any pertinent developments in our understanding of neurodiversity would probably appear on that website.

I also know the AIR Network Model's website has scientific articles on trauma and dissociation, so I recommend looking into them too.

I'd also look into the MNRI PTSD Recovery Protocol by Svetlana Masgutova, Ph.D. I'm not sure if she's neurodivergent herself, but I would hardly be surprised if she is.

I recommend this because the studies behind her protocol reveal some extremely telling things about neurodiversity and its relationship with trauma. I have one of her books and it goes into the entire neuroscience and testing behind it, but unfortunately copyright laws means I can't, like...share the charts. This approach seems to be the direction the science is taking us on regarding neurodiversity though, so it might be the "in" you're looking for in terms of a non-ableist medical framework.

(The breakdown though, because this shit's fascinating:

Traumatic stressors can cause our nervous systems to blow like overloaded circuits. This causes our primitive reflexes [patterns of movements that reflect the core operating system of mindbody interface] to re-emerge, or to fail to integrate if the trauma was during babyhood.

Evidently, retaining 35% or more of the known reflex patterns produces the symptoms associated with things like sensory processing disorder, autism, ADHD, cerebral palsy, anxiety, or emotional dysregulation. It even contributes to depression and dyslexia.

Dysregulated reflexes can impact damn near anything: cognition, attention, coordination, disposition, emotional reactions, visual /auditory / spacial perception, pain perception and threshold, body growth, mood, and even the function of our digestive and immune systems.

From what I understand, certain primitive reflexes correlate with certain disorders. Apparently the Startle Reflex / Fear Paralysis Reflex and Moro Reflex are highly correlated with Autism diagnosis. Other reflexes potentially contribute to it since this is not a "rigid categories" thing, but those are the two her book is citing in particular here.

You can actually re-integrate these reflexes with exercises, which initially thought was fucking bogus until I tried it and suddenly could perceive and conceptualize things I didn't realize I couldn't before, as well as perceive parts of my body I didn't realize I couldn't perceive before [like my spine].

You can actually find integration exercises on youtube. It's an Occupational Therapy thing, but since it's new and emerging it's not something the average OT knows how to do yet, I'm afraid.

Also, important note: Some reflexes take longer to integrate, others don't. They might have to be integrated in a certain sequence depending on which ones are retained, but I'm not sure what all the sequences are.

Rule of thumb for anyone reading this: If the internal experience of "being you" sucks ass in any way, check your primitive reflexes. It ain't a curse and it ain't the devil, you might just need recalibrating.)

Hope this helps!

[broknd0ll]

‎∩⑅∩ ֙⋆  𖦹 WELCOME!!  💤🌐

(caso queira me conhecer melhor, pelo twitter (X))

(if you want to know me better, on twitter (X))

[feastonkings]

spencer charnas / he/him ——— no way is that GAGE CHERNYKH.. they’re a 35-year-old HUMAN notoriously known for being APATHETIC & CREEPY but there are some people who have seen them being METHODICAL & SHARP. if you ask me, they remind me a lot of remnants of a russian accent, blood on a tile floor, a smile that doesn’t meet the eyes, hair and heart as black as coal, the quiet in losing loved ones, and a well placed mask, but that could just be because they’re considered the EVIL TWIN around town. just keep an eye on them & see if their true colors shine through..

GENERAL.

full name: gage anatoli chernykh nicknames: tbd classification: human gender / pronouns: cis man, he/him age / birthday: 35, november 14th orientations: bisexual, biromantic occupation: co-owner of killer trash & soldier for skyport mafia location: upper district status: single family: gavrill chernykh (father, deceased), svetlana chernykh (mother, deceased), giorgi chernkyh (brother, deceased), godric chernkyh (twin), pandora (brother's widow) strengths: methodical, sharp, compelling, artistic, comical weaknesses: apathetic, creepy, selfish, bloodthirsty, unstable character inspo: joker (batman universe), patrick bateman (american psycho), stu macher (scream), freddy krueger (nightmare on elm street), barney stinson (how i met your mother), chuck bass (gossip girl), villanelle (killing eve), loki (mcu), roman roy (succession), frank costello (the departed)

BIOGRAPHY.

tw: murder, suicide, blood, graphic violence, abuse, nsft mentions

unrelenting passion, it’s the kind of thing that flows hot in your veins and reaches all the way down into your core. when you want someone so bad, need them, it’s hard to breathe air that doesn’t have their taste lingering on your tongue. that kind of passion is rare, indeed, but it can be incredibly dangerous if it isn’t shared. gavrill chernkyh felt this the moment he set eyes on svetlana mirkin.

when someone is that infatuated with a person, it’s hard to deny them. it felt so good to be wanted, to be needed, she was just another girl trying to survive poverty after all. svetlana fell into the beauty of the thing, wrapped up in lust and the heat of the moment. next thing they knew, they were pregnant, having a shotgun wedding, and at each other’s throats.

first came giorgi, and things were good for a while. gavrill was working his way higher up in the crime syndicate his family aligned with. then five years later when things reached their peak, gage and godric came crashing into the world. it was then that their relationship started its downward spiral.

fights started getting physical, passion transformed into something much more poisonous. still, svetlana stayed through the highs and lows until she started to notice giorgi following in his father's footsteps. she wasn't going to have it any longer, she fled to texas with the help of her sister that already resided there and took all three boys with her.

that didn’t stop gavill's passion though, it took him awhile but he found them. and oh, was he angry. out for blood, and that’s exactly what he got. svetlana was torn to pieces in the end. she fought back against him, but she was no match for his skillset. the red cloud lifted from gavill's eyes and he saw what he did, the massive pool of blood, the object of his desire in pieces, his two young boys staring at him in shock. right there he shot himself.

the twins sat in that massacre for nearly two whole days, covered in the mixture of dna that ran through their veins. it was when giorgi came home that authorities were called. despite their crime affiliation, there was no avoiding the involvement of the law.

all three boys went to live with their aunt until giorgi could legally take over the twins' care. the trauma of the situation settling different with the two youngest boys.

gage loved his mother, at least he thought he did, he saw how much his father loved her, too. he was indifferent toward his father. but he did quite enjoy the sight of blood.

the point was that he never felt the need to grieve the situation. he went on with his life as usual, attended the counseling, went to school, got high marks and went home. violence would come in bursts of rage and silent acts of revenge (even if the deed done to him was warranted or accidental).

he didn't show remorse for his actions. he found it hard to care about things that did not benefit him in some way in the end and that never really changed. over time he became much better at masking it, however.

gage chose to go the family business route, becoming an associate for the skyport mafia in his teens and then a soldier later. he still doesn't have much regard for authority but he tends to abide by their rules well enough.

he helped open killer trash (pun intended) after noticing a large amount of items they could be making money off of from victims him and others were tasked with taking care of (or that he took the liberety with as well). those items shouldn't go to cops to auction, they should get that money. plus it offered another place for backroom dealings in plain sight.

gage lives his life how he pleases, when the mask is up, he is charismatic, funny, and perhaps a bit pretentious but that goes with the status. he attends social events, holds dungeon parties, hosts orgies, and goes to bed with beautiful people in multiples. those unsettling traits shine through, but he'd much rather have people worship him than run and hide. though he does find fear to be just as much of a compliment if he cannot get their love.

HEADCANONS.

he's an artist with when he hurts people. takes his time to enjoy it and leaves scenes precisely the way he would like the masterpiece to look, even if the victim gets to walk away after.

his trophies, though he does not prefer the word, are the pictures he takes of his completed work that he later paints onto canvas.

he is a quite skilled cello player, both him and his brother are, as was their mother's prompting. the sound still comforts him and he will play to relieve stress when he cannot do it any other way.

when his older brother was killed, he didn't grieve but he did get even and took those out that took him out. this is the one time godric gave any blessing for gage's actions.

more to come...

[ask-the-mikeys]

what gender of music the alters listen to?

Music genre? Well, I dunno. I just listen to whatever- Mike

Video game soundtracks, and sludge metal/grunge.- Mal

Svetlana loves pop! Like Marina and Lady Gaga!-Svetlana

Hiphop and rap- Vito

Mostly horrorcore and a bit of country-Manitoba

Darn kids…what happened to the good ol days of music! -Chester

(Mal Svet and Mani are so me core)

[politelydestroyingyou]

Hot take

I think Mal wasn’t exaggerating when he was talking about being the original

So my theory is that Mal WAS the “core” when they were born, he was the first personality to form but his parents weren’t the biggest fan of his “attitude” so through whatever trauma that inspired he ended up splitting Mike in his brain’s attempt to appease them and make the ab*se stop. Whether or not it worked is up to you and your headcanons, and I agree with most of the other popular ones (Vito formed from s*xual trauma, Chester formed from a loved one’s passing, Manitoba and possibly Svetlana are fictives, Mal is a persecutor and probably ageslides) I’ve just been thinking about that bit

[enteringdullsville]

The Red Drewman, Rudy

Statistics

Aesthetic: Cute

Age: 21 (Season One)

Alignment: Enactor

Badge: Scalene Triangles

Color Type: Red

Debut: Welcome to Dullsville

Effects: Hair Cut (Rudy’s hair bristles and sharpens, allowing it be thrown like needles or swung like a blade); Rollaway (Rudy curls into a ball and rockets forward); Scratch Damage (Rudy scratches and bites like an angry cat); Rage Beast (Rudy becomes enraged and his physical stats rise, switching to blunt hits like punches)

Family: J. Razbry (Stepbrother); Coco Haggleslak (Dog); Joy and Collin Razbry (Mother and Stepfather)

Rank: A (Primary Character)

Standout Features: Tall and spiky hairdo, freckles, tooth gap, hoodie.

Character Bases

His hair and tooth gap were partially inspired by Mike from (and by extension Chester, Svetlana, and Manitoba) Total Drama, as well as the former half of the eponymous Calvin and Hobbes, but I don’t have that kind of space.

Development

Rudy’s earliest designs emphasized his sharp shapes, but his anime hair, freckles, and tooth gap were permanent design elements. He was a more typically rebellious kid, and his literal edginess symbolized that.

From there, the only permanent change was the decision to make his eye extend from his profile and to make the man himself less pink.

Any differences from then on are just the inevitable consequences of drawing him by hand.

History

Season One

Rudy debuts along with the rest of the core cast in Welcome to Dullsville, in which he tries to introduce himself to the viewer before J. cuts him off, incensing him. This goes on apparently quite a while after the scene changes, and Rudy eventually accidentally attacks the camera.

“Who Needs Enemies”, the season’s B-Plot, initially chronicles Rudy and J.’s efforts to gather a full set of main characters. It starts in You Live Like This?, where Rudy attempts to dissuade an angry Tyler from attacking the present party, only for the latter to be knocked over the head by a door. Rudy drags Tyler back to the Oobay household as a new employee which, come Hiring Squad has resulted in him becoming the company talent scout (where he manages to win over Olive).

Be Excited

[plavi]

The mangaka of Gangsta. once made tarot cards based on her characters, and I wondered: what card would would our Bernardo be? Now, while all Major Arcana have been assigned by the important characters, there are still others that act as supporting character to the protagonist(s), and this is where the Minor Arcana comes in! With that in mind:

I would assign Bernardo with the Page of Swords.

He would be a Page because he is only starting out in the latest chapters of the manga (starting from ch49), a fresh face. As well, he seems to be the youngest member of the Corsica family so far as indicated by the ring he wears (this was pointed out by my dear friend in this post). He has more of an assisting role unlike the others (Uranus is the head of the family, Georgiana leads the "Pussy" brothel; others like Svetlana in charge of weapons/combat training). He is carefree and spontaneous, and can be seen as "less serious" because of this although he tries to give a good impression. He appears to have his job roles changes regularly by the family as "this time" his job is to assist the core troops. So, he is tackling with something new again.

Swords relate to communication and intelligence. He is shown to be quite talkative, knows about rumors & information on people (about "Storage" and that he was part of the Monroe family), and if not, he'll go out of his way to gather the information or keep it from you (even when he was unable to attain any new info about Worick, he doesn't give up. This is why he's a Page bc he is still learning). His role, as mentioned, is to plan and assist the core troops of Destroyers in their diversionary operation. Meaning, they have to find clever ways to distract their enemies and reach their goal efficiently. He also has a way with words, he seems to be a good communicator and can encourage you for a job well done (as he did to Emilio) or to wittily insult you (re: the "foreplay" comment with Worick). This fits with Swords again as they can also cause conflicts and tensions, which Bernardo is trying to balance out (in his favor).

[sapphire-weapon]

I know you've said before that you didn't like Leon in Damnation. I haven't actually watched it, honestly I don't find RE films all that good (though I'm excited for Death Island just for the fun of it) and I read the Damnation plot.

Anyway, would you mind elaborating on why you didn't like this rendition of him? How did you feel about the overall plot and Adas portrayal? I watched Adas fight, I liked the usual ridiculous backflips, lol. They're a classic RE charm. Other than that, the whole ending scene of her selling the big bad to a mysterious buyer had me rolling my eyes. She plays out the same god damn plotline in EVERY appearance she has. They never know what to do with her! I'll also admit I cackled at the "night we spent together" of w/e line, because of how painfully awkward it was. The voice actress sounded physically pained reading it, it was pretty funny! I just can't take the pairing seriously at all.

But yeah. Any opinions you have about any part of Damnation, I'd love to hear!

he's just fucking annoying. his personality is obnoxious. someone looked at the script of OG RE4 and went "okay what if this but way worse and less charming."

he also has absolutely nothing to do with the central plot of the movie. he's just kind of... there. being annoying. the core of the plot is Ada's investigation of Svetlana, and the heart of the plot is Sasha's resistance group. Leon just poked his fat ass into it because... idk. it feels like he's contractually obligated to be in every CGI thing RE puts out.

the kind of politicking and social maneuvering that Ada does in this film is the most that her character ever gets to shine at any point in the RE series. it's the only time we get to see her being an actual spy as opposed to just another combat unit with a different title. it shows off her ability to work people other than Leon and highlights the extreme amount of intellectual and emotional intelligence she has.

Leon's presence just drags her down. just like it always does. but it feels even worse in Damnation, because she's so good and interesting outside of her interactions with him.

the only thing that Damnation does right wrt Leon is establish his alcoholism in tandem with his distrust in the government that he works for and the feelings he has about being trapped and used. the very first scene he's in and the very last one are both great. everything else can be punted the fuck away.

and Sasha's story is legitimately compelling and heartwrenching, and it's a goddamn shame that we didn't get to see this movie play out through his eyes. he had the potential to be one of the most sympathetic protagonists that this series has ever had, and the movie went "OKAY BUT LEON THO" instead.

pisses me off, man.