#stuff that is every day for swedes

[cold-earth-connection]

Just found the most perfect, wonderful, beautiful homewares shop in Sweden. I was remarkably restrained. When my next good job comes along, I shall not be.

[three--rings]

One thing I haven't seen a lot of talk about in the fandom so far is about the financials of this season.

It took us two whole months to get a confirmation of renewal from Max, and I talked at the time that I think there was probably a lot of heated negotiations going on at the time with contracts and that's why it took as long as it did.

I think we see a huge number of indications of the compromises that were made in order for S2 to be made. One obvious one that has been talked about is being making in in NZ instead of LA, to save $.

But there's also the eight episodes instead of ten. And then the cast aspect. One downside of moving overseas was having to fly out and house the cast, not just pay day wages.

We knew immediately about Guz Khan not coming back, losing Ivan as a character. At the time I was sad but I thought it had the air of a pretty harshly practical call. If you went through the main recurring cast and said okay which character will affect the fewest things, has the least character interactions of anyone? It would be Ivan. (With the only competition being The Swede IMO, but he's Stede's crew and therefore a little more central.)

And then this season started and we got first The Swede sidelined and taken out of major scenes. And then I noticed that different members of the crew were simply absent for long stretches, like Wee John isn't around for ep 5 at all. And then Buttons takes flight.

Lucius and Pete aren't at the party for most of it. Fang isn't in the torture scene. Roach and Fang aren't in the bar. Etc. SCHEDULING IS HAPPENING.

The new characters are almost entirely played by NZ local actors, which is great, but also...cheaper.

In other words there are big signs that they did everything possible to give us a giant cast of almost everyone we love from S1, and cool new characters, in the most economical way possible.

And I'm grateful for it. I'm grateful we got S2, and it looks great, and it's well written, I'm having a blast, and we get to spend more time with this awesome cast.

But I also kinda think it needs to be said that the cost-cutting shows. That it shouldn't have been only 8 episodes, the pacing is off. That we miss every time someone from the ensemble isn't on screen.

That despite what they've put on screen looking very good, there's far less costuming budget, there's less elaborate sets, and it's a little disappointing. And it's clear it's not a lack of will or talent or vision but blatantly lack of money.

Look, streaming networks want brilliant shows that people love (that will get them to subscribe) but they very don't want to pay anyone to make them. That's like, the whole moment we're having right now.

Max puts out promos about how great it is to not have unions messing shit up in NZ. Well I have friends who are union costumers in LA and guess what union costumers did amazing last season. This season, well, I guess Stede got three whole shirts, so that's cool.

So I dunno. It's just stuff I think about. I'm not trying to be negative about the show in any way. I'm extremely happy with this season; I love it more than well, possibly any show I've ever been in fandom for.

But I see you, Max. You're cheap. You weren't that cheap when you were called HBO.

[twigg96]

If u havent already done it,, hcs for dethklok w a very physically affectionate s/o ? Like one that is always down to cuddle n stuff

Hello my sweet Anon! No I haven’t written anything like that yet!! I hope you like these HCs

Nathan - While Nathan himself is a gigantic teddy bear who is touch starved beyond belief. He does find the act of being propositioned with cuddles and touches to be bloody vomit inducing for several reasons. The first being that cuddles and intimate touches took just that... intimacy. And truth be told Nathan wasn't the best when it came to that realm of being. Sure he could pretend. But he hated how nervous he became when his leg touched his partner's, uncertain if the tingles of excitement he felt were ever reciprocated. He hated how sweaty his palms became holding his SO's knowing full well that they could feel just how moist he was becoming just thinking of where that could lead. Marriage and kids of course... and he hated that his mind took him down a futuristic rabbit hole that got his heart broken more times than he ever realized. But his partner... never seemed to mind. Their head on his chest during movies they listened to his heart beat and breathed with him through the panic. Kissed his sweaty knuckles and eased a hand over his bouncing knee. They whispered that they were scared too. But that was an important part of intimacy no one ever talked about. The anxiety and the fear that came with every touch the one that eased with time and with every breath shared until it was hardly noticed anymore and soon two souls became one.

Pickles - The little drummer was not a man who was overly touchy to begin with. People could thank his abusive parents and sketchy past for his fear of intimate touches. He'd duck away from a hug faster than most at the beginning of a relationship. He wasn't repulsed by touches. He'd probably even pull his partner in for hugs and cuddles. But he had boundaries he expected his partner to understand and respect just as he knew his partner had their own he would respect over anything else. There were times that he would pull his partner into his embrace all day. Most of those times alcohol or other substances were involved, other times he or his loved ones were in a heightened emotional state. He hugged people the tightest then with all his heart and soul. He held them to tell them he was there. He wasn't going anywhere. Burying his face in the crook of their neck, his beard scratching against the skin of their neck he held them tight to help them relax. And when his asthma hit and his anxiety washed over him the most was when he needed his partner to step in and return the favor.

Murderface - William likes to pretend that he is as macho as they come. And sure he pretends for a while. He pretends that he's a sexual extraordinaire, has a 20 meter defeater, and lives without a single fear in the entire world. He pretends for a while when he first meets his partner... because he never expects to catch feelings. He ever expects to see them again. But the fact of the mater is... Murderface is entirely too scared... for much of anything when it comes to anything intimate with his partner especially when he starts a relationship with his partner. It takes a long time for him to open up to his partner. To let them touch him so intamatly and with so much trust that they won't hurt him. Because the truth of the matter was that was what he was scared of most. Getting close. Comfortable. Then being discarded and forgotten like yesterday's trash. He hated that feeling. He hated it more that he had grown used to it. So when the couple were watching one of his favorite movies... maybe a boring documentary and his partner's full attention was on the screen not on their phone, not talking to some other guy... he felt himself grow comfortable... wrapping his arm around their shoulder he pulled them close kissing their temple.

Skwisgaar - For the Swede cuddling and touching came in the form of sex so often that he became complacent to the idea that cuddling only came to those in the throws of passion. When his partner tried to hug or hold him in public it sprang to life a problem the blonde had to either excuse himself to the bathroom for. Although many times he simply would try to pull his partner into the alleys and closets to get some alone time. One night when his partner comes to bed they wear the most revealing clothes they could find, crawl into bed and cuddle up close to him, their fingers ghost his skin as they lay sweet kisses across his collar bone, neck, and jaw. Just when Skwisgaar is positive he's getting lucky, his partner pulls away. Touch therapy. That's what they call it. They want to retrain his brain into learning they can touch him without always getting laid. At first he fights the idea. Then his partner cuddles close once more telling him to close his eyes. He does, not because they said so of course... but because he was getting blue balls and it hurt... But... eventually he understood. The quietness, the sensuality without the sexuality... it was nice. Comfortable.

Toki - This boy is just as touchy feely as his partner. It makes other people uncomfortable how clingy they are to each other. Stage 5 clingers would not be a stretch to describe either of them. Velcro Partners. If they're seen apart it's not because either of them want to be alone.

[starscelly]

stuck in my office in the snow scrolling through your flying stars au tag, if perchance you would also like to have some brain dumping time I would love to hear about what the vibes are like on the road!

I have love listening to their playlists bc they overlap with my taste so much, but introduce me to new music as well, thank you for putting them together!

omggg 1. im glad you enjoy the playlists!!!! i put off making them for like. since i made the au lol but im really happy i did because i do rlly like how they turned out and im glad you agree :3 :3 <3

2. suuuch a fun question because i was literally thinking the other day about how like. the flying stars are Just Big Enough that i can have them have fun stuff like roadies and consistent shows and dedicated fans but Just Small Enough that i dont have to consider big fame and can have wyjo run a merch table and stuff like That. and going on the road for shows is for Sure under that umbrella of them being the perfect size for it to be fun to consider lol !!!

they are for suuuure in the worlds shittiest tour bus to ever exist, 3 pairs of bunk beds and everyones trying to sleep with each other all the time fdsjkfkds generationally unbearable (roughly following this floor plan but not really but kinda) i think On The Bus they have, obviously, miro roope otter robo on the two bunk beds across from each other and then well. they WANT harls and tydel as their trusted roadies on the other two bunk beds. but their openers are following them in an Even Worse van and hey would you look at that. they keep disappearing. mostly tydel bc harls likes to spend his free time bothering otter and robo and then staring at miro and roope but. occasionally the urge to go hang out with the younger guys comes over him.

(i also dont think ive posted this before bc i did wanna do it with character sheets but. ive been lazy. so without going into specifics their opening band IS wyjo + nils + mav + stank + bäck. all crammed in a van)

i think because of the size differences of the two vehicles every time they stop you really do get just a wild scramble of people switching but the flying stars do NOT really leave the bus. i think the younger guys kinda swap who gets the two bunks, occasionally theyll come crash on the teeny tiny couches or god forbid at the dining table booth thing. sometimes theres the expected 6 in the bus, 5 in the van. but more often theres like, 9 in the bus 2 in the van, 7 in the van 4 in the bus, etc etc.

this doesnt include their driver who i dont think needs to be a Staple of the Stars but would be fun to be a rotating cast member from the stars. one of those guys we all kinda get into for a season or two and then he disappears ie a csmith or a cmiller . a jhanley even!

BUT GENERAL SHENANIGANS RATHER THAN TECHNICALITIES like u were actually probably hoping for LOL.

i think theyre pretty clean and not super crazy rockstar lifestyle making everyones lives miserable - helped infinitely by miro and otter's den mother instincts as well as insistence from wyjo + bäck that they need to help clean whenever they come hang out on the bus because ): its just Nice to Do...

also because the total lack of two person space, the van DOES have the appeal of um. well . getting down and nasty. whenever they make a long stop and they guys are just kinda milling around for a few hours that Van is Rockin. tydel buys a sticker for it eventually that says if the van is rocking dont come knocking and everyone wants to kill him about it (mostly harls. Actual Owner of the van)

some like. rapid fire fun tidbits i guess! because otherwise i will spend all day writing long musing paragraphers lol!!!

whenever it's wyjo's turn to drive the van delly. shocker. is in there. and wyatt has driven actually maybe 30 miles the whole fucking tour because delly is like ahhh i can do it dont worry :D

sometimes nils and oskar get on the van with the flying stars and robo and otter (notorious swede lovers) just Observe Them interacting with miro and roope like a nature documentary... They Think They Like Each Other??? But They Also Keep Insulting Each Other's Whole Cultures.... Its Confusing

sometimes hair dyeing takes place in the teeny tiny shower. usually for roope. sometimes wyjo or nils need a touch up. every time its bad. every time they almost flood the fucking bus.

Manager Joe will come hang out on the bus if hes going to be at one of their shows, Manager Joe will NOT be stepping foot near that van because he KNOWS whats been going on in there with his pseudo son.... the vans rocking sticker........ sickos....

somebody hotboxes the van once (nobody will confess to it being them) and the sticking smell eventually pisses everyone off so bad for days that they only communicate in terse one to two word responses (and this is why nobody will confess) (i will though. its mav and stank. and guess whos complaining the loudest. mav)

robo almost gets tattooed on the bus once because roope swears he can do it and they get real fucking close before otter reminds him what theyve done at that table hes about to get tattooed on. numerous times. and robo is like. oh. i actually dont want to get an infection and die. and then miro and roope are mad as fok because what do you mean that was a Surface Option this whole time and also WHEN ARE YOU GUYS DOING THAT

theyre all just sharing clothes at some point. nobody knows what belongs to who. their wardrobes will never recover. stank almost wore oskar's pants once and didnt even notice somehow.

one night they have to keep stopping the bus because their driver is experiencing an Illness and theyre all like damn this sucks. and harls is like well I could just drive for a few hours. and this is how they unlock harls Lore ("you have a cdl?????" "im forklift certified too" "WHY")

but also he doesnt often volunteer to drive because. they have someone for that. and also he wants to hang with the fellers..

they can never agree on food when stopping so they can never just Go To a Restaurant. they have to go to one of those strip rest stops with like 6 different eateries. and then its always just like roope and wyjo getting something different from the group because they just whine the loudest abt it and everyone else was fine

the aux is a NIGHTMARE. the girls are all fighting. usually theres enough overlap they can kinda decide an order or queue that makes sense for them. except miro. they do not let miro pick the music. ever.

as up each others asses they are 24/7 while traveling, they do actually really respect the Need for Privacy to an extent. if miro and roope are having a quiet conversation on the couches robo and otter will go hang out in their bunks or in the van, they let wyjo spread a puzzle out on the table when he needs time away and nobody bothers him about it (that much), sometimes stank and mav request private driving time, robo will take a minute or two to sit up with the driver alone, etc etc

[eulaab]

𝑬𝒖𝒍𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒆 𝑨𝒆𝒓𝒊 𝑩𝒊𝒆𝒍𝒌𝒆.

AU: Model trapped in Superhuman body.

Is a quiet yet lively spirit, a Swedes-Japanese lady who was born to a Swedes father and a Japanese mother. Life took a fateful turn one tragic day back when she was six years old; leaving her with a mysterious, flower-strewn path all her own. She was the youngest who unfortunately became the only child of the family overnight. Leaving all her childhood memories in Japan, she moved to New Zealand once she turned seven ― redoing all the memories she had lost to a new one.

Residing with a family who has experienced the unimaginable loss of their beloved child, Eula gracefully navigates through life's challenges with poise and resilience. Though often left alone in her family’s large-empty house, she develops a keen sensitivity to nature, finding that the flowers seem to lean her way, as though they share in her secrets. Despite lacking affection and attention from her parents, Eula blossoms into a compassionate individual with a profound empathy for all living beings. Raised without a clear understanding of the concept of "home," she dedicates her time to pursuing academic excellence and spreading love and kindness she has within her to those in nursing homes and shelters.

Drawn with specific bond with nature, she loves walking and having moments in nearest park wherever she is. Fly herself all the way to South Korea to continue her study learning about her favorite stuff (earth and its contents), she also shoots her luck by joining model agency after years of weighing up the compliments she always get.

Never did her parents speak of her twin brother after the accident, creating a gaping void in her heart that often brought tears to her eyes in longing for the connection she believed she once held dearly. Furthermore, her story unfolds quietly yet purposefully, as she embraces a gift she may never fully explain yet can hardly deny—a connection to nature that seems to bloom with her every step.

Name: Eulalie Aeri Bielke

Nickname(s): Eula, Yura, Aeri, Ellie, Lillie.

Birthdate: August 31th 2OO4

Birthplace: Tokyo, Japan.

Nationality: Swedes-Japanese

MBTI: INTP

Currently Stay: Seoul, South Korea.

Occupations: College Student (Environmental Science), Freelance Model, Volunteer.

[allovertheworldblog]

The bus to Haparanda leaves early

So, I was up at the top of Sweden and had to decide where to go next, west to Norway or east to Finland.

In the end I decided on neither and went back down through Sweden.

When I was leaving Kiruna though it looked like I was going to Finland, that was the plan anyway. 

I decided on going to Haparanda (what a great name) which is on the border with Finland.

Only trouble was the bus leaves, the only bus to Haparanda, leaves at 07.10.

I get to the bus station 20 minutes before the bus leaves.

I’m the only passenger that does the full trip.

We have three different drivers over the 6 hour trip through snow filled Sweden.

The only reindeer we see over the course of the trip are in a sort of farm.

We get to Haparanda after 13.00 and I walk to the hostel through the ice and slush covered paths.

The city has a strange feel to it, a sort of half a city feel to it.

And in a way it is. 

Next door in Finland is Tornio, the original settlement in the area. Then when Sweden lost Finland to Russia they needed a base for trade in that region, on their land as it were, so they built up Haparanda.  

Today there’s no border control as Sweden and Finland are both members of the European Union.

The two cities have banded together and created a joint city in effect, a Eurocity.

The hostel has a sign up saying that the reception is only open from 16.00 to 19.00, I knew about this in advance but turn up anyway.

I ring the ‘out of hours’ number on their sign.

A lady opens the door and asks if it was me that was ringing, she’s not happy for whatever reason.

I ask if they’re open.

She agrees to 'sort of open’.

She checks me in and again with the sheets.

She wants to charge me 50 Swedish Krona for sheet 'rental’. That's Euro5.60 or $7.40.

I have my own sheets but thanks anyway.

She has a certificate for helpfulness on the wall behind her, NOT!

I put my stuff away and walk to the nearby IKEA, their most northerly store in the world.

I have a not very pleasant meal composed of some kind of meat.

It’s mostly Finns that are shopping there, they pay in Euro at the food counter.

The Finnish language sounds strange after hearing nothing but Swedish for the past week and a half.

My Swedish is non-existent but I’d become used to hearing it and used to the Swedish way of things, their bread, their ubiquitous cinnamon buns, kanelbulle.

They even go as far as to dedicate a day a year to their buns, 04 October is Kanelbullens dag or Cinnamon bun day. http://scandinavianfood.about.com/od/coffeecakessweetbreads/r/cinnamonrolls.htm

The Finns suddenly looked quite different from the Swedes, not as stylish, more brusque. 

The shopping centre is quite new but about a third of the units haven’t opened.

There are a couple of fast food restaurants and few cheap clothes and a few over priced ones, a couple of mobile phone shops and that’s about it.

If this was Sweden there’d be people around every corner in little cafés drinking coffee and every third shop would be a flower shop. 

The prices in the Finnish supermarket, on the Finnish side of the river, made me wonder about how travelling in Finland would compare to Sweden.

Sweden is considered to be one of the more expensive countries in Europe but from what I could see Finland was giving them a fair run for their money and in many cases coming in ahead of them.

The next morning I walk to the Finnish side of the river and search out the bus station.

It’s a Saturday morning so the bus station is closed, don’t bus stations the world over close on Saturdays?

The signs in Finnish that different bus companies have up in the window of the station do mention a Saturday service.

I’m annoyed and frustrated though, so I don’t give it time to work on my Finnish to figure out which column is Saturday and to figure out if the right destination I want is served by the individual companies.

So I decide I won’t be going to Rovaniemi after all.

Two Australian girls in the hostel in Kiruna had recommended the place for seeing the Northern Lights and for visiting Santa Claus in the year round Santa World close by.

I walk back across to Sweden and find that their bus station too is closed but they have a waiting room open and their electronic signs list all departures and arrivals for that day.

I felt relieved to be back where I know the set up.

Umea, half way down Sweden, is where I’m headed.

It might even be possible to catch a ferry across the Gulf of Bothnia from near there to Finland.

During the trip from Haparanda to Umea there’s enough time to watch a couple of movies.

Only trouble is they’re the same movies.

The attendant on the bus mustn’t have a very big movie collection as we’re shown 'One Day’, which we just catch the end of, then 'I Don’t Know How She Does It’ with Sarah Jessica Parker.

Then 'One Day’ again, then the Sarah Jessica Parker movie again.

Umea looks interesting and I might spend a couple of nights there. Of course it wasn’t to be.

In Umea I walk to the hostel. It's just before 20.00 at this stage.

A guest who's smoking outside lets me in.

The locked reception has a sign on it:

     'Good Morning guests…. the reception will be open from 06.00 to 07.00.  The Emergency Out of Hours number is …… (it cannot be used for making reservations).

Tomorrow reception will be open from 19.00-20.00’.

I walk back to the bus station, get some food and wait for the night bus to Stockholm. The bus gets me to Stockholm at 05.30.

I hang around the bus station for a couple of hours.

I go back to the hostel that I’d left a week previously before I went to the north of the country, it’s like coming home.

[iris-writesx]

shifting eyes and vacancy, vanished when i saw your face | gentlebeard

read it here or read it on ao3 <3

i’m not kidding i got the idea, wrote my entire plan, wrote it, and posted this all in the span of like 12 hours. i got the idea and was basically foaming at the mouth until i wrote it

i’m posting this as a one-shot for now, but i feel like i has potential for more chapters so if you’re interested to see more please let me know!!!

ed is so fine he’s all i can think about akdkwkf

title is from “enchanted” by taylor swift x

2.5k words — meet-cute, angst, threats, masquerade ball

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

Stede hadn’t been somewhere so exquisite in years.

The ship that himself and his crew were on was marvellous. From the crystal chandeliers down to the golden trim of the carpets, whoever had designed the ship knew their stuff. Stede could only hope that one day, The Revenge would be so delicately beautiful.

It was a couple of weeks ago that they had found the letter for the masquerade ball on one of the many vessels that they had raided — on that particular raid, Stede had come back with some lovely potted plants that he had displayed around his room. He had discussed the opportunity with the crew, and after Frenchie and Olu had discussed some pyramid scheme that they wanted to put to work, it was decided that the crew would go- well, some of the crew. Jim, Wee John, Roach, and Buttons had all opted to stay behind and keep watch of the ship, so Stede, confident that the ship was left in good hands, had opted to join his crew to the ball.

And although the types of people who would be there undoubtedly made bad company, he was actually excited.

He had dressed himself in a quite exquisite teal suit, paired with a beautiful mask that was tied around his head with white silk. The mask itself matched the clothes he wore, though had golden vines woven over the mask, a detail he loved to see. Although Stede always prided himself on his appearance — he had to build up an image for himself as The Gentleman Pirate after all — he felt particularly wonderful in his masquerade get-up.

He had helped the rest of the crew dress for the occasion, too. They had all lined up outside his quarters, and one by one he had given them an outfit that, in his proud opinion, made them all shine.

Lucius, who was stood beside him at the drinks table whilst the rest of the crew had disappeared to mingle in with the crowd, was dressed in a lovely burgundy, it really brought out his eyes. For once, the boy didn’t have his book in his hands — Stede had promised him a night away from his work, just to enjoy himself… as long as he noted down the key points from the night once they had gotten back to the ship.

“We all stick out like a sore thumb,” Lucius pointed to the Swede, whose suit was a little mismatched as Stede didn’t have trousers for him that fit that matched the shirt he was wearing. “Are you sure they won’t realise we weren’t actually invited, Captain?”

Stede waved his hand as a dismissal, sipped from his glass of wine. “All these people care about, Lucius, is one-upping each other in the who’s more posh game. As long as you don’t offend their fragile pride, they won’t notice a thing.”

It was almost overwhelming, the amount of people there that Stede had promised to never end up like. He could imagine they all had considerable wealth; mansions and ships and jewels beyond his own property, and all they cared about was showing it off. He didn’t intend to strike a conversation with any of them, he was content spending time with his crew-

“I’m gonna go find Pete, Cap.” Lucius pat him on the shoulder before he disappeared, weaving into the crowd.

Well, he was happy to spend time by himself, too.

He finished his drink — the wine just had that taste of expensiveness — poured himself another, and with the wine-glass in hand, he started wandering around the giant hall in the centre of the ship.

As he passed the partygoers, he admired each of their attires; everybody was dressed up in masks, even the butlers who had been pacing the room serving delicacies. That, in turn, meant he didn’t recognise anybody that he might’ve known there — any men from his past, from that damn school — and, more importantly, nobody recognised *him*.

It was exciting, being hidden in plain sight whilst he was making his name as The Gentleman Pirate. Stede figured that nobody on the ship would take well to hosting to pirates. The masks certainly made the visit more exhilarating.

He wandered the outskirts of the hall for some time, just observing whilst he sipped his wine, and after some time had past and he had finished his drink, he began to realise that he hadn’t actually seen any of his crew in quite some time. Stede paused his walk, by one of the many doors out to the deck of the ship, and turned to face the masses of people there. His gaze flickered between them all, tried to find a familiar face within the crowd, but fell short. Where had all of his crew disappeared to?

He was jolted out of his search by somebody who had bumped into his back, and flinched, immediately turning to see who had walked into him.

“Oh fuck- sorry, mate,” the stranger gestured to the patio doors behind him. “Didn’t see you when I came in.”

“Oh no, that’s quite alright, I was a little in the way.” Stede let out a slight laugh, waved the stranger and his apology off.

The man who had bumped into him was, he had to say, one of the best dressed in the room. His suit consisted of a deep purple fabric, which had been woven with gold thread. The same purple matched the man’s mask, trimmed with lace and tied back with a fine velvet. The stranger’s hair, which he could see was quite long, had been pulled back and out of his eyes, spare two loose strands which framed his face, and the full beard which he had no way of getting rid of, Stede supposed.

There was no denying that this man was gorgeous.

But there was just something about him, something Stede couldn’t quite place, that left him at an odd place out. Something in him was telling him that this man didn’t belong here, either.

“I have to say, your suit looks marvellous,” Stede commented before the stranger could walk off to where he had originally been directed, because he really did. “I hope you don’t mind me saying so.”

The man himself clearly didn’t mind — in fact, Stede watched as the corners of his mouth lifted into a slightly bashful smile, like he hadn’t been expecting any compliments. “Oh- no, thanks mate. It’s pretty neat, huh?” He stretched his arms, flapping a bit to show off the loose lace of his sleeves by his wrists. It was just a little too long, like it wasn’t his. “Got it off of a ship I was on a couple days ago.”

“Oh, a merchant vessel?” Stede asked, curious. “You’ll have to point me in their direction, all of my suits come from land.”

The stranger hesitated, blinked a few times, before he nodded. “Right, yeah,” he cleared his throat. “A merchant…”

“Well I’ll keep an eye out,” Stede nodded, before he smiled, and extended a hand to the stranger. “I’m Stede, Stede Bonnet.”

The man took his hand with a strong grip and shook; Stede noticed, upon looking down at their joined hands, that a tattoo of a spider was inked into the back of his hand. Which, he definitely thought was odd. Most people there, he would assume, would’ve been under the impression that tattoos were sinful. “Ed, nice to meet you.”

Ed certainly wasn’t supposed to be here.

Stede hoped that it wasn’t obvious that he shouldn’t have been there, either.

“So what do you do, Ed?” Stede asked once their hands had parted; his curiosity had taken a hold, now, and he couldn’t help himself. If the story was interesting enough it would certainly be great for Lucius to write down.

“Oh, just, y’know,” Ed waved his hands a little. “Fancy shit, just like everyone else here,” he shrugged, but Stede was still looking at him, so he tacked on. “I’m a… I’m an accountant.”

“An accountant?” Stede raised his eyebrows. “Finicky business, that.”

“Oh yes yes, very… uh, tough,” Ed nodded. “What about you, Stede Bonnet? What do you do?”

Stede paused. He hadn’t thought of his lie yet, it was quite fun. “I’m a… well, I’m a trader of goods, I suppose you could say. I came here with my crew…” at the mention of his crew he remembered that he had been looking for them, and glanced back to the crowd again, scanning. Still nothing. “Who have appeared to disappear,” Stede sighed, looked back to Ed. “I’m sorry, will you excuse me? I’ll just check to see if they’re outside,” he gestured to the door, before hesitating. “Would you… I mean, when I’m back, would you like a drink?” Stede gestured back over towards the drinks table, flushed pink, and he hoped Ed couldn’t see it underneath his mask. “They have some fine wine here.”

Ed smiled, nodded. “That’d be great. I’ll be here.”

“Amazing, yes, great,” Stede nodded, smiled, felt a glow in his chest. “I’ll be back in a tic.”

He gave a final smile to Ed before he left through the patio doors, and upon his deep inhale of the cool sea air, he realised how hot he felt. God, when was the last time he’d flustered himself up like that?

He cleared his throat and tried to focus on finding the crew. His heels on his shoes clicked against the wooden boards as he walked up and down the deck, scanning the faces of the people there — none of which were his crew. Stede knew that nothing bad could have possibly happened to them, the worst that they would experience on the vessel was a terrible conversation. But part of him just felt… uneasy. Like there was something wrong, something he wasn’t seeing.

He huffed out a breath as he came to rest against the railing of the ship by the doors he had just exited from. Stede stared out at the open ocean for a moment, admired the pink swirls in the sky from the sunset, before he reached up to take off his mask. The cool air felt amazing on his face, and for a moment he just took some breaths of the air, tried to calm his uneasiness.

Everything was fine. He’d go inside, share a drink with Ed, his crew would show up, and all would be good.

Stede had been so distracted by just breathing that he hadn’t heard the patio door open behind him, but he was quick to register the presence against his back, the breath he felt against his neck. His eyes widened, swallowed, and was about to ask who was stood there, but was beat to it by,

“The Gentleman Pirate?”

The breath from the words hit the back of his neck, and it took too long for his brain to catch up with his ears, because- that was Ed’s voice.

Ed didn’t know about his piracy. He didn’t know who Stede was. He had just met the guy.

“Wha- Ed?” Stede asked. “How do you-”

So much happened at once that it took a moment for him to process it all.

Ed’s hand had pressed against his lower back, harder and harder until he was pinned against the railing in front of him. The surprise made him drop his mask, and he heard the porcelain shatter against the wooden flooring beneath them. But the loss of his mask was the last thing on his mind when he felt the sharpness of a blade pressed to his throat, cold and dangerous

Oh god.

“What- what are you doing I-”

“Shh shh shh,” Ed’s breath was still hitting his ear, and it made Stede shudder beneath him. “Calm down, mate, I don’t want to have to hurt you,” his voice was so smooth as he spoke, it made Stede’s head spin. What was happening? “Took a while for us to track you down, y’know. I was asking myself, what’s so special about a pirate like you? But you aren’t just like any pirate, are you Stede?” Ed clicked his tongue, pressed his hand firmer. “No, fancy fucker like you shouldn’t even be a pirate… and here you are.”

Ed’s hand gripped his hip, then, and the knife was momentarily pulled from his throat, allowing Ed to spin Stede around to face him. Whilst his hand never left his hip — which Ed gripped tightly, fingers digging into his hip bone, pushing to keep him pressed to the railing — the knife returned to his throat.

Facing him, Stede was able to see that Ed, too, had rid his mask. And he hated to admit it of the guy who had him at knife point, but he was even more gorgeous without the mask.

“I don’t- I don’t understand- Ed-”

Ed leaned in closer, until his breath spread out over Stede’s face, until all Stede could smell was the rum that he had obviously been drinking. “Since I know your alias, Gentleman Pirate,” Ed fucking smiled, gripped his hip tighter. “Think it’s only fair you know mine, huh?”

There was a pause, so Stede forced himself to nod, shakily, too afraid to say the wrong thing to speak.

“Name’s Blackbeard.”

Stede’s eyes widened, felt his face pale, his breath rushed in such a deep inhale he thought his lungs might fucking explode, his heart was thumping so quickly he could feel it. “Bla- Blackbeard?” He choked, “Oh god don’t kill me, don’t- you- you can have anything you’d like, my ship is just over-”

Stede didn’t register that his hand had left his bruising grip on his hip until it had clamped over Stede’s mouth, effectively silencing him.

“Already said I didn’t want to hurt you, didn’t I?” Ed- Blackbeard smiled at him. “And anyways, as oh so kind as it was for you to offer, I already know where your ship is,” he nodded over in the distance. “Look over there.”

Despite the instruction, Blackbeard curled his fingers into Stede’s jaw until he had no choice but to turn his head to the side, saw The Revenge in the distance where it had been anchored. But when he looked closer, he saw a dingy on its way towards the ship.

“My men, the kind fuckers that they are, have escorted all of your crew back to the ship. Why don’t we join them?”

Stede, unable to say anything, just stared at Ed with wide eyes.

“Been wanting to talk to you for a while, why don’t we do it back on your ship?” Blackbeard suggested, as much as it could be considered a suggestion with his hand clamped over his mouth and his blade pressed to his throat. “I’d love to see the place,” he paused, and leaned in until the loose strands of his hair tickled Stede’s face, “and me and you need to have a little chat, hm?” He grinned. “You still owe me a drink.”

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

comments would mean the world <3 requests are open!

[3416]

How tradition has made Maple Leafs’ big Swedish family feel more at home

by Jonas Siegel | Nov 30, 2022 | The Athletic

At some point last season, a tradition was born within the Maple Leafs. They call it Swedes’ dinner.

The tradition is exactly as it sounds. The Leafs have a standing dinner group on trips out of town that’s full of Swedes. It was spearheaded by William Nylander, the unofficial and somewhat controversial “captain” of what’s currently the largest group of Swedes on any one team in the NHL. (Note: Detroit will pull even once Magnus Hellberg plays a game for the Red Wings. Our count is based on Swedes who’ve played at least one NHL game for their club this season.)

Swedes’ dinner represents the closeness of that group of seven — six of whom were in the starting lineup together earlier this month when the Leafs honoured Börje Salming shortly before his passing.

“We’re a pretty tight group here overall,” Timothy Liljegren said of the Leafs, “but it’s always nice to talk Swedish sometimes. I think it makes you not miss home as much.”

It started with Nylander.

During his early days with the Leafs, the team had very few Swedes — an Andreas Johnsson here, a Calle Rosen there, but hardly a large or consistent group. Then, suddenly, the group expanded as Liljegren, Pierre Engvall and Rasmus Sandin all arrived and became Leaf regulars.

Nylander, the oldest and most experienced among them, began to host the group for dinners on the road.

“And then we started making it a thing,” Nylander said, “and then now (we have) more Swedes so now it’s just a big group of Swedes going for dinner.”

Erik Källgren came aboard late last season, followed by Calle Järnkrok and rookie Pontus Holmberg this fall.

“Those first games you’re up (with the Leafs), first road trip, Willy was always good at having some place to go,” Liljegren recalled. “It’s nice — you don’t have to look up restaurants and stuff. He usually takes care of that stuff.”

It’s how Nylander became the unofficial leader of the Swedes, the one who typically selects the restaurant for Swedes’ dinner — usually an Italian joint of some kind.

Some, or rather, one member of the group doesn’t think Nylander takes the responsibility seriously enough.

“Willy, he takes care of ordering food,” Sandin says. “But then he thinks he’s captain of the Swedes — he can think that if he wants.”

Sandin, the youngest member of the group, is grinning.

“Last time we went for dinner Pierre decided where to go, and did a good job for once,” Sandin said.

Sitting within earshot in the Leafs practice facility dressing room, Engvall responded incredulously, “For once?”

“I think Sandy wants to be (the captain of the Swedes),” Liljegren said. “(He) might be in a couple years.”

Källgren notes that with a longer history in the league, Nylander simply has a larger catalogue of restaurants to pull from than the upstart Sandin.

“Ask him again,” Nylander says laughing when told of Sandin’s sniping.

Occasionally, Nylander says he’ll cede leadership to Sandin or Engvall. During a recent trip to Pittsburgh, he went for dinner with former teammate and close pal Kasperi Kapanen and left the group to fend for themselves.

It’s all in good fun, of course.

Sandin and Nylander share an especially tight bond among Leafs. They’ve known each other since at least 2015 — three years before Sandin was even drafted by the Leafs in the first round — and live a minute apart from one another back home in Stockholm.

They’re joined at the hip in the offseason — hitting the ice, the gym, and the golf course together just about every day. They’re members of the same golf club in Stockholm.

“I see him almost too much,” Sandin says.

It’s a brotherly vibe. “He helped me lots when I came in at the beginning,” Sandin said of Nylander, “showing me some places to go to eat.”

Sandin will grudgingly concede that Nylander’s restaurant game is strong. “He’s a foodie kinda. He eats a lot and he likes good food, so it’s great to be around him.”

Sandin and Liljegren have also grown close after playing together frequently with the Leafs and Marlies. The two will grab dinner in the offseason when Liljegren passes through Stockholm.

Sandin describes Liljegren lovingly as a little, well, “weird.”

“He’s a creative soul,” Sandin says.

Liljegren, he notes, has recently begun to paint (yes, paint) and hopes to start taking guitar lessons soon.

Of his dabbling with a paintbrush, Liljegren says, “It’s easy to get on a Playstation or watch a TV show, just something (else) to do.”

What does he paint? Liljegren says his most recent attempt was of the Joker, but acknowledges that “it’s not very realistic.”

The Swedish bond that exists within the Leafs has made Järnkrok, who joined the team on a four-year deal in the summer, feel more at home. He spent the first eight years of his NHL career in Nashville where he lived and shared dinner night after night with fellow Swedes, Mattias Ekholm and Filip Forsberg.

Uniting with all the Swedes for dinners has been nice, he says. He’s felt welcomed.

“They’re all very good guys,” Järnkrok, the oldest of the group, says.

Of his first impressions, Järnkrok concedes that yes, Nylander is “a little bit of a different cat, Ras talks a lot, (and) Timmy’s more quiet and more like me.”

As for Järnkrok, who hails from the small city of Gavle, Liljegren observes, “He’s a pretty laid-back guy. I feel like most people from where he’s from are really laid back.”

Dinner conversations take place almost exclusively in Swedish, which all have come to appreciate.

“It’s one of those things that makes you a little bit more comfortable,” Källgren says.

It’s like a little slice of home within the larger Leafs squad.

Though Källgren had played with Nylander on national teams when they were both younger and with Holmberg in the Swedish Hockey League, Källgren says he didn’t know any of the Swedes on the team all that well. He quickly found his place within the comforts of Swedes’ dinner.

“They can help you and guide you when you get up,” Källgren says.

The Swedes look out for each other that way.

Right now, they’re trying to help Holmberg get settled on his new team and new life in North America, notably using the somewhat unfamiliar English language.

“We try to get him to talk,” Engvall says.

At Swedes’ dinner, for instance, they’ll insist he order his food in English.

“I think he understands pretty good,” Engvall observed. “It’s just, he needs to learn to talk.”

And do it by practising.

“I was just s— for a long while, I think,” Engvall says of his own English. “You just gotta start talking.”

It was Sandin who scooped up the puck after Holmberg scored his first NHL goal in New Jersey last week.

Dinner conversations inevitably return to hockey.

The Swedes play credit card roulette to determine who picks up the cheque. “It’s up to luck,” Källgren says.

Not that any of them mind.

“It’s usually a fun time,” Källgren concludes. “We enjoy each other’s company and it’s good to get to try some different restaurants and (experience) different cities. We enjoy spending time together. It’s fun.”

[changethecircumstances]

WWDITS AU idea with a focus on Izzy/Frenchie

Ed, Izzy, Fang, and Ivan are vampires when Ed gets the manic idea of making a documentary

the film crew consists of Lucius (director), Pete (cinematographer), Frenchie (sound guy), and Roach (provides food and medical support because shit gets wild with vampires and they obviously never have food lying around)

Lucius keeps getting onto Frenchie for talking during interviews and getting in shots because he's constantly asking about confirmation on his superstitions

any time Izzy tells Frenchie one of his superstitions is wrong, Frenchie rationalizes it by saying Izzy isn't as smart or world traveled as he thought he was and usually Fang and Ivan have to hold him back

Roach is actually a vampire hunter (none of the humans know that) and there's constantly stuff on and off camera of him looking like he's nearly going to kill one of the vampires before he just shoves the meat cleaver behind his back

Izzy is the only one catching on but when he confronts Lucius and Pete they just say "that's ridiculous, Roach is just quirky like that"

Stede shows up one day and Izzy loses his goddamn mind because Stede was supposed to just be some stupid fling Ed had 70 years ago how the fuck is he still alive

turns out Ed accidently changed him so now Stede's a weird vampire werewolf hybrid

there's one day where Ed decides everybody needs to dress more hip and modern so they go on a shopping trip with Lucius

Izzy immediately burns the clothes they get him but everyone notices when one of Frenchie's scarves go missing and suddenly Izzy has a splash of color on him

Swede shows up and is an energy vampire that Ed takes pity on and invites to live with them before asking anyone

cut to Izzy, Fang, and Ivan running all over the house to try and avoid him and Ed constantly falling asleep around Swede cause he's trying to be nice and listen but also dear god it's draining

Buttons is a next door neighbor of Frenchie's and when Izzy meets him he immediately asks "How are you terrified of witches but ok living next to one" and Frenchie tries to laugh it off and is like "You're not a witch Buttons, right?" and Buttons just gives him a long stare down his nose and Frenchie screams

Oluwande and Jim were originally a 2 person werewolf pack but they end up including Stede because his weird ass hybrid thing means larger packs don't fuck with them or vampires

though it starts out as them just using him, Oluwande and Jim do slowly grow to like Stede, though they still don't understand his relationship with the vampires

the vampires don't have any familiars in part because Izzy will get too annoyed and is of the mindset 'why have someone else do the job when i know i can do it better'

but really it's because Ed has a terrible track record and somehow always ends up accidently killing any familiars they've ever had

a lot of them Ed doesn't even realize he accidently killed because Izzy will take the fall because he knows it makes Ed sad so everyone thinks Izzy just kills familiars left and right even though it's not completely true

the Badmintons are head of the vampiric counsel and don't like Ed's group of vampires

when they finally hear of Ed making a vampire/werewolf hybrid they use that as an excuse to get rid of all of them

during the escape, Roach kills most of the vampires but Ed, Izzy, Ivan, and Fang only see Frenchie accidently killing Nigel with his clumsiness and now everyone thinks he's a vampire hunter and Izzy is basically the 'mark me down as scared and horny' meme while Roach is in the background getting zero credit and just going 'for fuck's sake'

Jack is a human that keeps getting reincarnated and every time he comes around him and Ed get really chaotic

Ed finds out it isn't bad luck that Jack keeps getting killed but because Izzy keeps killing him because he's a jealous fucker

when Jack dies again but comes back as a ghost this time, Izzy and Stede reluctantly work together to try and get rid of him because he's annoying as fuck

they also do the whole ghost self needing to find peace thing and Frenchie just sees 2 Izzy's and is like 'ayeeee' and both Izzy's are like 'absolutely fucking not'

because everyone thinks Frenchie is a vampire hunter, Roach actually starts teaching him so he can better defend himself against other vampires

Wee John is Frenchie's roommate and thinks every time Frenchie tells some ridiculous story it's just his silly superstitions again and John just gives a polite laugh and enjoys the story while having no idea any of it is actually real

[stedes-incredible-library]

Fics where Stede is a professor and his students don't know his husband is Blackbeard? I've read like three of them so far and I need more they're all so good

I wonder if the three I've found are the three you've read. I've added some that don't explicitly fit what you've described, just in case you enjoy the Professor Stede / Professor Ed kind of story.

Students don't know his husband is Blackbeard

Area Man Causes Havoc By Being Gay by electric_friend [M], [6,259 words] [WIP]

Classical language lecturer Stede has a small group of students, so they chat sometimes. They all know about his adorable goofball of a husband Ed from Stede’s stories. For some reason, though, they haven’t quite figured out that that has anything to do with the biker who’s been stalking their professor with what must surely be nefarious intent. In fact, that, they’re quite concerned about. And thus, chaos.

cruel professor, studying romances by pleasesupplymewithyourwahoos [T], [11,183 words]

‘Well, I’ve just noticed some stuff lately, and I think that the Captain might have a crush on Professor Bonnet from the English department’.”

Pete gasped, “No.”

“Yes.” Jim nodded, eyes glinting with mirth, “See, the underclassmen think that the Captain might have a little crush on his best friend Stede Bonnet, because of all the time he spends hanging around the literature lectures and giving Bonnet the gushiest goo-goo eyes known to humankind.”

“The Captain.” Wee John said.

“A crush.” Swede repeated.

“On Professor Bonnet?” Oluwande deadpanned, “You mean to tell me they don’t know?”

the kids aren’t alright (they’re dumb as hell) by blladnna [M], [2,099 words]

Stede and Ed are happily married college professors, and Stede takes every opportunity to gush about his relationship. However, due to one student's misunderstanding, most of the college now believes that he is cheating on his sweetheart of a husband with the notorious Professor Blackbeard. Suffice to say, they aren't thrilled about the idea.

Other Professor Stede AUs

Our Museum of Rot and Love by ObsidianCreates [T], [8,369 words], [WIP]

When a museum centered around Pirates and Historical Piracy opens up in his city, history professor Stede Bonnet is thrilled! He attends right away, delighted to find the museum home to kindred spirits in his interest in piracy. And when he meets Edward Teach, the owner and director of said museum, his life changes completely. The companionship they strike up is so easy that he almost feels like he's known Ed his whole life.

Closing Time by lookwhosinside [M], [5,566 words], [WIP]

Ed owns a restaurant, and Stede happens to be a happily married college professor who wonders into his bar one day.

Hey Sailor by luminous writes [M], [1,554 words], [WIP]

Ed is a bar owner (the bar’s name is Queen Anne's Revenge) and Stede is a professor at the local university teaching the history of pirates as an elective course in the history department. When Stede goes to the bar for his birthday and meets Ed, the two hit it off instantly. Eventually, one too many chance meetings leads to feelings developing.

A Professor Ed AU

love for beginners by simpleParadox [M], [10,610 words]

Unhappy with his life, wealthy CEO Stede Bonnet decides to leave his job, wife, and kids to go to university and study anthropology. There he meets Edward Teach, his Anthropology 101 professor, along with a ragtag group of university students. Stede expected the unexpected when going back to school, but he certainly didn't think he would fall for his professor as well as end up on the wrong end of a revenge plot.

~Mod C

[dragonmuse]

Ok, who of the Leda House gang has a tote (or handbag) that ends up containing half of their life?

FRENCHIE. Frenchie has this big faded pink corduroy bag with a brown handle that he's had for ages and if you stick your hand into it, it'll disappear up to your shoulder. It contains everything he needs, half of Roach's shit because he never has pockets, some of John's things on principal and three sticks of Lucius' lip balm.

Stede has a little leather messenger bag, but its' not nearly as comprehensive.

Eddy never really gets with carrying purses. They are very much still 'wallet, phone, keys, lipstick' and that's it. She does love to stick random shit in them though, so laundry day comes with a small bin for 'Eddy Misc' which often gets decanted into a box. The box gets pawed through every few months, and most of it gets thrown out. Most of it.

John, Pete and Buttons are all pocket people too. Simple, streamline, pocket people. Although Pete often has Lucius' lip balm in there with the other standards.

Roach goes rogue. Often his stuff comes out of unexpected places. he has definitely ducttaped his money and ID to himself more than once.

The Swede has a straight up purse, a really cute one that one of his brief boyfriends bought him. It's bright yellow which makes it hard to lose and he's very good about having some needful basics, including snacks in it for anyone who needs.

Alma carries a shiny black purse shaped like kissing lips that is also fairly minimal.

Mary has very deep pockets and she can get a surprising about in them, but she forgets half the time. Except to always have a pencil and a sketchbook.

Izzy just keeps duplicates of everything he needs in his usual locations, including his car. He does often find tubes of Lucius' lip balm in his pockets though because...

Lucius just generally stores his belongings in the world. He carries a satchel, but he has pencils, lip balms, tissue packets, condoms and lube sachets, safety pins, and sometimes entire spare outfits just cached away like a demented squirrel. Everyone at the Revenge has Lucius' things somewhere in their home and half of them have no idea how they got there or even that they're there at all. Usually Lucius forgets himself until he needs something and can summon it like magic.

[tinytinybumblebee]

Everyone on the Revenge who has a babie space - izzy, Ed, Jim, Swede, anyone else? - normally their regression gets spaced out so there's only one or two babies at a time, but every so often it coincides so that the Revenge turns into a nursery for the day, everyone is just trading off babies in shifts, tryna keep them all fed, clean and happy

Aww!! Those 4 are definitely the ones who slip to a babie, even newborn headspace amongst the crew ;w; ♡

But 🥺 aaaa!!! 4 babies!!! 4 itty-bitty pirates!!♡♡♡

Oluwande has Jim, babie Jim only wants their Oluwande!! No one else can hold Jim, maybe Lucius but only if Oluwande is within view ;w;

Swede clings to Roach and Frenchie, Frenchie is probably thrilled to be big brother to Swede, playing him music and playing! Roach makes sure the blonde babie is eating healthy/drinking his juices!!

With Izzy and Ed, oh goodness those two babies want their Mama Stede! Stede has two arms so he can hold his boys but, Fang + Ivan are there to help out! Shifts when Stede needs to go change Ed, so Fang bounces Izzy on his knee while Ivan is cooing at the babie Izzy♡♡

Lucius, Pete and Wee-John are there to help out too! They're like, the cool babysitters because Lucius reads to the babies, Pete will show the babies stuff he's widdled and Wee-John plays with the babies with dollies he's made for them♡♡

[chordsykat]

13, 32, F

For Caj 😍

13: What color do they think they look best in? Do they actually look best in that color?

It’s questions like this that make me think a lot of you guys are paying very close attention to the stuff I post here. I’ve taken every opportunity I could come across to have Caj’s past self portrayed in stark black in contrast to past-Skwisgaar’s white. As usual, I there is a reason for this, and why they’re both kinda in duller shades of gray these days.

But yeah, back to the real question, she prefers it. And who doesn’t like a Caj in skintight black leather? :9

32:  Do they have a go-to story in conversation? Or a joke?

Stop me if you guys have heard this one:   Hvad sker der, hvis en dansk blondine flytter til Sverige? Den gennemsnitlige intelligens i begge lande stiger. Skwisgaar has yet to work this one out as an insult to both blondes and Swedes.

F:  What do you feel when you think of your OC (pride, excitement, frustration, etc)?

I have a detailed answer here which “explains” the comic above... :D 

I just... I just had to draw it. You guys. It’s so stupid. Great questions! Thank you so very much for prompting me!

[alexskarsgardnet]

New Interview & Photo Shoot!  Alex photographed by Johan Sandberg and interviewed by Timothy Small for L’Uomo Vogue (October 2020)!

Alexander Skarsgård: the photo shoot and interview for L'Uomo

BY TIMOTHY SMALL, JOHAN SANDBERG 25 SEPTEMBER 2020

Alexander Skarsgård is a really, really nice man. A Swede through and through, Alexander, or Alex, is a very down-to-earth gentleman who could definitely act as more of a big shot, considering he is also one of the most interesting actors in Hollywood right now, a town that, in true Swedish style, he once defined as “kind of silly”. After getting his first big break as the lead in David Simon's excellent Iraq War mini-series for HBO, Generation Kill, Skarsgård exploded in our collective imaginations as Eric Northman in True Blood, while also acting for Lars von Trier in the wonderful Melancholia. 

Since then, he has been a very buff Tarzan in The Legend of Tarzan, a mute bartender in future Berlin in Mute, a very dark killer in Hold the Dark, and a hilarious Canadian Prime Minister in Long Shot, as well as giving an Emmy- and Golden Globe-winning turn in HBO's Big Little Lies. The self-defined “restless” 43-year-old is set to star in The Northman, Robert Eggers's highly anticipated third film, a “Viking revenge story” that Skarsgård himself was crucial in bringing to production – and, by all accounts, it seems like it could have all the right pieces to become a future cult classic. It certainly has that kind of hype.

L'Uomo Vogue:  The Northman is such an interesting project. I know it's important to you. It's also part of a growing resurgence of interest in the Viking era and Norse mythology and that sort of epic Scandinavian adventure. How did it all begin?

Alex:  It all started seven or eight years ago. As a Swede living in America, I realised there was a certain level of fascination with the Viking era and Viking culture – and this was before any of the Viking shows that have since happened. It made me realise that there basically had never been a real great epic Viking movie made, and I thought that that's what I wanted to do.

LV:  So how did the project kick off?

Alex:  I started having conversations with a studio back then, trying to crack the best story. All I knew at the time is that I wanted to make a big Viking movie. We had a couple of potential different starting points: we had a story about two brothers, and then one about the Viking travels down to Constantinople with the Viking siege of the city. We were looking for the right story, but I never really felt we were there. I knew the scope I wanted it to exist in. But what was the story?

LV:  And that's when you met Robert Eggers.

Alex:  Yes, like three or four years ago. We met about something else. I can't remember how, but we started talking about Vikings. And he was, like me, a huge fan of Viking culture and of that historical era, and I immediately felt he would be the perfect guy to direct this movie. And then we found an author and poet in Iceland, Sjón, who came onboard to write the screenplay – and they did a fantastic job, just cracking the story and the essence of it.

LV:  Sounds great.

Alex:  It's a real adventure movie, but it's much more. It taps into the culture, and the mysticism of the Vikings, it becomes more intimate and more personal. I didn't want it to be a generic “swords-and-sandals” movie. Robert is one of the best filmmakers out there. And the whole process is so much more gratifying than when you're quote-unquote “just an actor”. It's been truly extraordinary.

LV:  But then you had to halt production.

Alex:  Yeah. I was in Belfast, Northern Ireland, three months into prep on The Northman about seven days away from principal photography. Just gearing up, you know, getting ready to start a very long, very intense shoot -- a shoot that we were scheduled to wrap in July – and that's when the virus hit.

LV:  What did you do then?

Alex:  I normally live in New York, while my family lives in Stockholm. When the first wave came, I was on the fence: nobody really knew how long it would be, or what precisely was going on. So we shut down production for six weeks. The idea was to then see what would happen. I basically moved to Stockholm for four months.

LV:  How do you feel about this forced break from work?

Alex:  I had not been home for this long in... more than 20 years. It was strange. We were in a bubble; we were all healthy and safe. In a lot of ways, I had moments when I felt being surrounded by my loving family, feeling safe and loved, and taking a break from work, but then also feeling very guilty because I was, for the lack of a better term, being spared.

LV:  In the past, you've described yourself as being a nomad. Did you miss Sweden and the North?

Alex:  I realised how much I have been missing it. I go to Sweden regularly, but usually only for three or four days, maybe a week, tops. My father and two of my brothers are actors, so we're used to never being in the same city. We all travel all over the world. Maybe we'd get back together for Christmas. And I can really say that I had missed spring in Sweden.

LV:  Do you think we will change the way movies are produced?

Alex:  We're going to have to figure out how to shoot movies with dozens of crew members and hundreds of extras while still respecting social distancing rules. It's an unprecedented situation and everyone is scrambling to figure out the best approach. My brother was one of the first people who worked in our industry during the pandemic. He shot a movie in Iceland in the middle of the lockdown. The way they solved it is they split the crew into colour sections. So, hair and make-up had yellow armbands and the camera department had blue, and they had a “Corona appointee” on set who would call out, “Now blue go in!” and then “Blue, out! And yellow, in!” And then they would all do their job in turns. It was very military-like. Productions are already complicated, so we'll just have to add another layer.

LV:  How did you become an ambassador to the Clarks brand?

Alex:  To me, authenticity is very important. I don't want to endorse products I don't genuinely like. That's why I was excited when Clarks reached out. I've been wearing Desert Boots for 25 years. Also, I like to travel a lot. I like to explore new cities by foot. I want to be able to walk around comfortably in a classic, iconic shoe. I travel from movie set to movie set, and I often live out of a suitcase. And this teaches you to be frugal. Whatever fits in that suitcase, that's all I can bring.

LV:  Is that the Swede in you?

Alex:  Maybe. But we consume way too many things in this society. Also, you give things more meaning when you live with them, and when you go on adventures with them. Like, these are my boots. I've been places with them. And when they fall apart, I'll buy a new pair. If you have the right stuff to begin with, you don't need more.

LV:  Going back to The Northman, that really sounds like a dream project.

Alex:  It is. It will be a rollercoaster ride. I can't wait to get back to Northern Ireland and get back to the production. It's also a very physically demanding project, so I have been training for, well, since a few months before production stopped.

LV: In a way, getting into a role, getting on a movie set, acting through it, the whole process of making a movie is a bit like a little adventure. You have to prep, you have to travel, often with people you don't know, and you have to push boundaries.

Alex:  Absolutely! A huge part of the appeal of this profession is you get to travel, and you meet amazing, interesting people from all over. And the uncertainty, you know? What was it, 12 years ago, I was in New York, and I'd never heard of Generation Kill. And then two days later I was on a plane to the Kalahari Desert to be out there for seven months to shoot the series. And I'll never forget the feeling, sitting on that plane, thinking, “Two days ago I didn't even know about this project, and here I am on my way to Southern Africa to spend seven months in the desert with 200 strangers.” It's very exciting.

LV:  What a feeling that must be!

Alex:  And every single job is like that. Every movie is different. Your part, the tone, the energy, the people – it's always different. And for someone like myself, who has that kind of wanderlust, who's always looking on the horizon, it's very attractive to never know just what the next adventure might be.

October 14, 2020:  Updated with the full interview courtesy of our friends at the ASkarsLibrary (x).

Fashion credits:

Photographs by Johan Sandberg Styling by Martin Persson Grooming Karin Westerlund @ Lundlund Hair Amanda Lund @ Lundlund Stylist’s assistant Isabelle Larsson Digital Daniel Lindgren Production Madeleine Mårtensson and Olle Öman @ Lundlund

Read the full interview by Timothy Small and see the photo shoot by Johan Sandberg in the October issue of L'Uomo, on newsstands from September 22nd.

Sources/Thanks:  Interview:  Timothy Small for L’Uomo Vogue (x), Photos:  Johan Sandberg for L’Uomo Vogue (x), artlistparis.com (x) via artlistparisnewyork instagram (x),  luomovogue instagram (x) &  atomomanagement.com (x) via atomomanagement instagram (x), our caps from artlistparisnewyork’s September 23, 2020 insta story (x, x)

[ariendiel]

I’m currently stuck at home because my roommate tested positive and it made me wonder: how would the LI’s spend quarantaine?

Noooo, I'm so sorry, anon! Hope it's not too bad, and if you catch it too your immune system better ✨ annihilate✨ those little viruses. Thanks for the ask though, I loved this one!

How the LIs spend quarantine

Bobby

He'll start by think it'll be great, bake a lot and watch his favourite comfort movies before realising that was just day one, and then slowly start to panic. By the end he'll probably have watched every single Disney animated film and been through approximately 5 existential crises per day

Carl

Okay, but Carl is someone I think would be able to work from home, so you bet he'd try to just keep up with it and pretend like everything's the same. However, he will definitely sneakily re-watch some episodes of Star Trek and/or his favourite anime in the background though

Elisa

Okay, but we can all agree Elisa would make the absolute most out of it as an influencer, right? She'd promote lounge wear, skin care, self care, you name it. She'd document the whole thing on social media, work on brand deals etc. That girl never rests, and sees opportunities everywhere, and I love that for her

Gary

Honestly? He'd probably really miss regular life. Going to visit his nan, hanging out with his mates at the pub, the gym, being at work. But, he'd handle it as well as he can, keeping himself occupied by maybe doing some small home renovation stuff, cleaning the yard, starting a small building project and so on!

Henrik

Poor restless Swede would almost definitely cry while longingly looking outside, like a puppy wanting to go for a walk. Man was not meant to be quarantined inside, and if his lives close enough to nature he'd probably still sneak out for some solitary walks. Still, I think part of him would use the quarantine to relax and do other things he enjoy

Ibrahim

For Rahim I can actually see him enjoying the break from golf as I don't think it's his biggest passion in life (confimed by CMM). Instead, he'd spend the time doing what he wants for once, which I think would be reading and practicing drawing comics. He probably has a home gym too, so he'd be fine in terms of keeping active

Jakub

Worst for Jakub would for sure be how he's unable to go to the gym. So the second he finds out he'll start making a home gym. Everything is now gym equipment and the livingroom is his gym, no virus is going to stop his gains (I also low-key think Jakub would be the type to break quaratine...)

Lucas

He's a physio, not a doctor, but I still think that's something that makes him takes these things very seriously. He's also just in general a responsible guy. He'd spend the time tidying in his document folders etc. on his computer, do some work outs at home, some educational reading, maybe try some Korean cooking... Emphasis on try. Also lots of the horizontal tango and cuddling on the sofa while relaxing together

Marisol

I think she'd be okay at first, doing some reading, tidying her flat, studying/working remotely, doing lots of adult hugging... But after a few days I think she'd start to get super restless. Not being able to do what she wants really rubs her the wrong way and makes her feel super anxious

Noah

Okay, but Noah? Man probably thrives in quarantine. I mean, no one is allowed to bother him and he can justify spending lazy mornings in bed with a book and coffee. He'll catch up with his to-read pile, get to try that family recipe he's wanted to give a go for ages, and finally watch a few Criterion Collection films... Living his best life basically

[one-boring-person]

Requested by: @phantomshadow13

I had fun writing this, so I hope you like reading it!😊💛

Not One To Brag.

Gunnar Jensen (The Expendables) x reader

Warnings: swearing

Masterlist

It's surprisingly brisk in the hangar this morning, especially for mid-July, the five mercenaries bustling about all wearing thicker shirts under their body armour, most also wearing gloves, though this is more of a choice made to protect their hands against possible threat in their upcoming job, as opposed to fighting off the cold. Breath materializes in the air as pale mist, blowing past parted lips in lazy gusts, curling around the face of each man respectively as they go about their usual tasks. Light conversation runs back and forth, mostly between Caesar, Toll and Gunnar, as Lee and Barney bicker amongst themselves over in the corner, as they always do. 

In his hands, Gunnar's allocated handgun looks small, the grip dwarfed by his long fingers as he checks it over, slotting it into a holster at his hip as he goes to inspect some of the more heavy artillery they'll be taking with them. He can't think of anything more annoying than having to carry that stuff through a sweltering jungle in Ecuador - the most destructive guns all weigh far too much to carry comfortably in suffocating humidity, but for whatever reason Barney insisted on taking them along. Both Caesar and Gunnar had complained, knowing they'll be stuck carrying the burdens around, being the tallest of the group and all, but their boss hadn't relented.

Even now, Gunnar has to fight back an exasperated sigh as he heaves a minigun up, checking over the chain of rounds and firing mechanisms for possible faults: If he has to lug that thing around, he'd at least like to know it works. Smoothing a hand down the barrel, he feels it over to make sure there are no weaknesses to it, before he puts it down, inspecting the trigger, trigger guard and safety over just as carefully. In doing so, he fails to notice Barney calling out to someone until he hears his name being roped into the sentence.

"Gunnar! There's a girl here to see you!" Lee shouts back at him from his position beside Barney, the Brit craning his neck to find the Swede.

Frowning, the tall blonde straightens and steps out from behind the plane, a surprised look crossing his face as he sees who it is. Instantly, he goes over, ignoring the remarks as he passes Caesar and Toll Road, who he distinctly catches saying "I didn't know he had a daughter". 

Unsurprisingly, (Y/n) looks terribly out of place amongst the varied weaponry around her, the young woman eyeing a nearby crate of hand grenades with slight unease in her expression. Her civilian clothing is also a marked difference, a stark contrast with the thick body armour the others wear, serving to draw yet more attention to herself. Despite all this, however, she is smiling politely, a box in her hands as she waits for Gunnar to reach her, unsure of how much farther into the hangar she should go. She isn't left waiting for long, as the Swede's long legs bring him over to her very quickly.

"(Y/n)? What are you doing here? Is something wrong? Are you ok?" He immediately asks her, still ignoring the stares of his comrades as they watch the interaction.

"I'm fine, don't worry. Everything's ok." She chuckles, waving him off, "You just forgot your lunch, that's all."

He blinks, stopping still, the notion completely lost on him, given his profession: he rarely even thought to bring lunch, so being told he forgot it is almost a shock to the system. Behind him, he can almost feel the others lifting their eyebrows, concealed amusement already waiting for him when he turns around again.

"My lunch?" He questions, somewhat confused.

"Yeah, I made you lunch, remember? You left it in the fridge this morning. Thought I'd try and get it to you before you left the country." (Y/n) reminds him, stepping closer to hand him the box, her eyes travelling to the others as she leans in to whisper to him, "Should I have brought them something?"

"No, no, don't worry. They're all covered." Gunnar laughs gently, taking the box sheepishly, now remembering what she meant as he pulls her into his waist awkwardly, "Thanks, love."

"No problem." She smiles wider, leaning up on her toes to press a swift kiss to his cheek.

Behind him, Lee manages an awkward cough, clearly trying to remind them that they're still around his colleagues. Pulling back, Gunnar looks to the rest of the hangar, gesturing to each of the others respectively.

"Sorry, I should've introduced you. That's Toll Road, Caesar, Lee and my boss, Barney." The four others nod, saying brief "hello"s, smiling politely at her.

"Good to finally meet you, (Y/n)." Barney greets, his rough voice sounding friendly as he addresses her.

"Yeah, we haven't heard much about you." Lee agrees, amusement lacing his tone as he sends a pointed look Gunnar's way.

"Not one to brag." The blonde responds, shrugging with a grin as he holds (Y/n) against him.

At that, everyone in the room snorts, including his girlfriend, finding that statement highly amusing.

"What?" Gunnar protests, looking around at them all.

"I think we all know you could brag for Sweden." (Y/n) laughs, slapping his chest lightly as the others agree.

"She's right. You haven't got a modicum of modesty." Barney chimes in, leaning back against a nearby crate.

"That's not true!" Gunnar tries to disagree, only to be interrupted.

"Bullshit. You brag like you got something to brag about." Caesar quips, smirking at his words.

"Got more to brag about than you do." Gunnar responds, "Good aim, for one." 

Caesar goes to argue, only for Lee to cut in.

"Alright, ladies, keep it together." His snide tone makes (Y/n) laugh quietly, the young woman watching the exchange with interest.

Gunnar and Caesar both grumble, clearly not pleased with being reprimanded.

"I'm gonna go, then. I'll see you in two days, ok?" She says, turning to Gunnar properly.

"Yeah, see you then." He smiles down at her, pressing a careful kiss to her lips.

Pulling back, she moves out of his grip, but not before turning back to him once more.

"Be safe, don't get yourself killed. If you do, I'll personally pull your heavy ass back into the world of the living so I can kick it for being so stupid." She smirks at him, waving to all the others as she leaves for real.

Silence settles on the others, during which time Gunnar moves back over to the minigun he was fussing with before.

"For a guy who never shuts up, you really managed to keep her quiet." Barney comments from across the room, chuckling as he starts to polish his revolver.

"Is that why you stopped hitting on every woman you saw? I did wonder." Toll chips in, the others agreeing.

"Like I said, I don't like to brag." Gunnar shrugs again, choosing to ignore the friendly jibes.

The others all groan in exasperation, Lee and Caesar scoffing at the confession.

"We are not having this conversation again!" Barney says, before anyone else can.