#still don't get why they didn't suspect it tho

[alien-wooliee]

did y'all know that volcarona was quickbanned

[apricot-blossomss]

If you're still accepting requests would you be willing to do Hermes with fem!reader who has body image issues? Like not feeling like she's worthy of him or will hold his attention? I LOVED the way you wrote the last one of him stealing all of reader's stuff; no pressure tho if you don't want to do this subject. Thanks for your time! 💜🐝

☛ hermes x mortal! fem! reader with body image issues

☛ sfw; cw: body image issues, self deprecating thoughts, anxiety

It felt utterly unreal. The temples and palaces, shining in a golden hue, the impossibly delicious food and, most of all, the guests of the party. Was it a wise decision to have your first time on Olympus be visiting a divine festival? No. Were you utterly overwhelmed by everything here? Yes. Definitely.

A hand found yours and you turned around, startled, only to find Hermes smiling at you. His hair was uncharacteristically orderly, bronze curls framing his face carefully, not as disheveled as usual, after a day of work and flying around. "Hey sweetheart, enjoying yourself?" You nodded and hoped your smile didn't seem too forced. And it was beautiful here, just too much for your poor mortal eyes to comprehend.

It wasn't only gods attending the festival. When you looked over the crowd, you spotted centaurs, nymphs and satyrs as well, and even a few mortals like you, if you were seeing correctly. But the majority of the guests were major and minor gods and goddesses, though in their human form, still almost too beautiful to look at. Like Hermes in the beginning. But during the last months, you had seen him almost every day, and could at least look at him without having an an aneurysm- or a body image crisis.

Hermes squeezed your hand and you looked up at him. The excited grin he gave you had you a little worried. It was the grin of cream smeared in your face when eating cake and several items disappearing in strange correlation to his frequent visits. The god leaned down to your height - even in his human form, he was still a lot taller than you. "Wanna meet my family?"

No, gods, please, no.

"Uhm," you said, unconsciously fiddling with his fingers which always calmed you down. But he knew that, too. Hermes caught your restless fingers and brought them to his lips to press a light kiss onto them. "You don't have to. We can just stay here, if you want. All your call, baby."

Having lost the ability to fiddle with his fingers, you chewed on your bottom lip. When you looked back at him, your voice was thin and full of doubt. "I don't get- I mean, why would you want to introduce me to your family?"

The god's smile widened even further and he pecked the tip of your nose affectionately. "I want to show my amazing girlfriend off, obviously." You wanted to glare at him for messing with you, but he looked so earnest that you couldn't help but believe him. Instead, you let out a small and only slightly bitter laugh. "Show me off? Have you ever even looked at me, Hermes?"

"Plenty," he hummed, covering your cheeks and temple with kisses. "Why would I not look at my stunning girlfriend?" Embarrassingly, you realized that quite a few bystanders were giving you stares and whispers. Not him, he was a god. You. Probably wondering if the god's newest fling really was the ugliest girl at the party.

"'M not," you whispered, because you suspected some of these people had an excellent hearing beyond the limits of your mortal one. You put your hand over Hermes lips, but he only peppered your palm with kisses, moving up your arm to the ticklish spot and you giggled involuntarily. The triumphant smile he gave you was so utterly endearing you would have jumped him. If you weren't here.

"Please?" How were you supposed to say no to those eyes?

"Fine," you sighed, already regretting your decision. But Hermes was ecstatic, throwing an arm around you and guiding you through the crowd that made way for him wherever he walked. You tried to keep your head down and seem as invisible as possible, which, fortunately, wasn't that hard if you were standing next to a glowing diety.

"Brother!" someone called, someone the crowd made way for just as quickly, if not hastier, than Hermes. Your lover held you a bit more tightly but gave you a reassuring smile when a young man, decked out in gold that couldn't compare to the color of his shoulder-length locks, approached you. He ruffled Hermes' hair and then, his gaze wandered down to you. At first, he seemed surprised, no doubt because he was underwhelmed by your appearance, but the next second, he gave you a blinding smile. "And who do we have here?"

Hermes introduced you and then him as Apollo. The god huffed. "Do I really need an introduction? If so, I can give it for myself." You were a little unnerved by his smile, if was too bright, almost hurting your eyes. "I'm Apollo, god of all things beautiful and helpful to you mortals and thus, your favored diety."

"Spot's taken," Hermes said but he was grinning. With one look at your stressed glances, he leaned down to whisper: "he's harmless" You highly doubted that.

"So," the god drawled while looking you up and down. You were extremely uncomfortable. "You are the reason I've barely gotten a glance of my brother these last months." You were? Glancing at Hermes, you tried to think of the right answer. "Um... sorry"

"Where have you been hiding, Hermes?" a female voice called from behind and when you looked at the approaching you, your stomach dropped. It had to be Aphrodite, it had to be. Out of all the indescribably beautiful guests, she was the most striking and perfect. And the one you had dreaded seeing the most. You weren't stupid. You knew you were on the brink of spiraling into an abyss of body-hatred, and you were scared she would push you into it.

When she greeted Hermes, not even registering your presence, you suddenly remembered that they had had a kid together at some point, which only made your anxiety worse. You felt so utterly unworthy of Hermes in between all these gods that you wanted to carefully slip your hand out of his. Who were you to be holding a gods hand after all? But, realizing your intentions, Hermes only gripped it tighter. "Aphrodite, this is my girlfriend."

The way his voice was overflowing with boasting pride did warm your heart a little- until you saw the way Aphrodite looked at you. Surprised, at first, then undeniably sceptical. Her rose eyes looked you up and down and you started sweating under the weight of her gaze. Should you have worn something different? Was it ridiculous of you to be showing up in a dress this beautiful, attempting and failing miserably to be pretty? You were nothing but ugly and desperate and pathetic.

The goddess greeted you and you greeted back quietly, your flight instincts kicking in. "Hermes?" He turned to you, smiling brightly, but it faded a little when he saw the distress in your eyes. "I'm- I'm a little hungry, can I bring you something from the buffet?" Hungry. Great. Couldn't you think of a better way to get out of this situation? Not daring to look at the goddess, you kept your eyes fixated on Hermes who was searching your face for hints of what was wrong.

"Sure," he then said and leaned down to peck your cheek. "That cake looked fantastic." You were thinking more like drowning in misery.

Giving everyone a small smile and goodbye without looking at either of them, you slipped away as fast as possible. Getting to the buffet was way harder without Hermes, because the crowd got more and more dense, so you gave up and opted to break from it, finding a bench somewhere with less people. The buffet had never been your objective in the first place.

You couldn't cry. Not here. Not surrounded by the most beautiful women you had ever seen. Your gaze wandered over stunning nymphs and glowing goddesses with their perfect bodies and perfect smiles, looking so graceful in their flowing dresses. Why were you here? If you had been able to shed your skin right now, you would have. You would still be hideous, but not comparable to these women who you shrank next to.

Why were you here? How could Hermes endure your presence, knowing he could have so much more beautiful women instead, women who didn't get anxiety from parties and rudely ran away from him and his family. Women who laughed, and danced, and made other people laugh. Who were so much fun and so much more worthy than you. You were a nothing. A miserable, ugly nothing.

"Sweetheart?"

You didn't want to look at him. Instead, you opted to fix your gaze on a particularly stunning lady wearing blue. You felt longing well up inside of you. If you could only have her body, her face, her smile, her flowing hair. Maybe you could love yourself. Maybe Hermes could love you.

"The crowd by the buffet was to dense, I couldn't get through," you said quietly, not sure if he was still there. He was. Hermes sat down on the bench next to you and there you sat in silence for a few minutes. When you finally glanced over, you were surprised to find him fiddling with his fingers in his lap. Was he nervous? Did he want to break up with you?

"I'm sorry," you said. "Back with your family... that was so rude of me."

"What's wrong?" he asked and you were surprised at how worried he sounded. Finally, you looked at his face and his pleading eyes and your heart roared. Now you had made him worried. A great girlfriend you were. "Please," he said, getting a hold of your hands and leaning down to eye level. "Tell me. I want to help, but I'm not Apollo, I don't just look at someone and instantly know what they're feeling."

"It's nothing," you said quietly. "Just a bit nervous, I guess." He didn't say anything, and you realized he was waiting for you to elaborate. When you looked at him and saw the helpless look in his eyes, you felt yourself breaking and hid your face in your hands. "How can you even look at me?"

"What?" He sounded completely perplexed.

"I'm hideous!" you sobbed, stubbornly hiding your face away because you felt your hands dampened by tears. "I'm ugly and unattractive and unworthy and even attempting to be anything but that is an insult to all the beautiful women here. And I don't get why you are here with me, why you are with me after all, I mean- why would you do this to yourself? I'm not worthy of you, I-" Your rambling was interrupted by a desperate and tearful gasp for air but you hid your face away stubbornly.

"What?" His voice sounded thin and utterly confused. Then, you felt his hands on your wrists, softly prying them away from your tear-dampened face. You didn't have it in you to fight them.

"Listen... You are... better at this than me," the god said with a nervous chuckle. "Remember the time I was so exhausted I fell out of the window? And you ran me a bath and you made me get in and you... listened to my endless tired ramblings and laughed at my stupid jokes so hard the soap slipped out of your hands and hit me in the face? And then, you... made me go to bed and tell you what was really stressing me out and you just knew what to say. Like, the exact words to make me feel better. And I still don't get how."

Hermes breathed in through his mouth, fidgety but hopeful at the fact that you hadn't interrupted him yet. "Do you remember that hiking trip? I was wearing you out, it was probably too much for you, but you were so determined to get to the top in time for the sunset. And we did and you were so full of wonder. And sure, the view was amazing, but I couldn't look away from you because- I just couldn't. And I had planned to throw you off the edge and catch you a few meters down but I couldn't bring myself to do anything because you were so in awe and so beautiful-"

"I'm not," you said. "Have you even looked at-"

"Sweetheart, my eyes are in perfect shape," Hermes interrupted you firmly. "Yours aren't, because, apparently, you can't see just how beautiful you are. And how good you feel. How fun it is with you. Do you know why I am always so out of breath when I knock at your window? Because every second of the day I want to spend with you, all the time I possibly can, because it feels so right to be with you. So I rush and I show up gasping and sweating at your door and it always feels like coming home."

You were stunned. Could you believe him? How could you not? Hermes seemed to sense your conflict and you felt him slump against you. "Do you have any idea how many times my father has scolded me in the past months for being late to my duties? I don't care if you think you aren't enough. You've always been enough for me. You're more than that. You are in all of my dreams, always on my mind when I'm away."

He caught his breath. This was hard, but he had to convince you of the honesty of his feelings towards you, and he had to get all that crap out of your head. "I'm a god, why would I be with you if I didn't want to be, if I thought I could do better?"

"You can!"

"No, I can't!" he pressed, almost shouting. "No one makes me feel the way you do. Don't you see? You hold me in the palm of your hand, I'm yours!"

With widened and tearful eyes, you stared at him and his gaze softened. "May I?" You nodded, unsure what he was asking exactly. Hermes pulled you into his arms and you couldn't help but feel so loved when he held you tight.

"Can we leave?" you asked quietly and felt him laugh shakily against your shoulder. "Yes, let's get out of here."

Reluctantly, he pulled away and made you look at him. "Would you please believe me that I love you? Because I don't know what else to do. Do you want my shoes? My gardens? My palace? All my temples? I'd give them all to you, if you would just believe me."

"I think I might need a little while to get it," you sniffled quietly and in full earnestness. "I'm a little stuck here." You managed a small laugh.

The god looked at you with such tenderness you felt yourself blushing under his gaze. "Then I'll remind you every day until you believe me how beautiful you are."

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[demonpiratehuntress]

Hi !!! Just found your blog recently- absolutely love how you write the comfort pirates :< !!🫶 if you’re open to requests (if not, pls ignore!! It’s not a need ^_^) would it be okay for strawhat and/or heart pirates (you chose which characters! Doesn’t have to be all) headcannons with a reader who losses their emotional support stuffie?

It’s not a big plush, a small one that could fit in your pocket- something simple and easy to hold or squeeze, but when they lose it they get kinda anxious :( they try to hide it from the crew tho, it’s pretty childish heh.. (and if it is, again no need to write agshdjfk)

Thank you!! Keep up the great work, and take care of yourself! Have a great night/day <3

thank you! you're so sweet <3 this idea sounds SO cute, i was definitely excited to write this one! I'm so sorry for the long wait, my laptop crashed and needs to be repaired so I'm doing all my requests on my phone which takes so much longer :(

taglist - @kabloswrld

plushie (Straw Hats + Law)

featuring - Zoro x F!Reader, Law x F!Reader, Usopp x F!Reader, Luffy x F!Reader, Sanji x F!Reader

summary - the ask above

warnings - none

ZORO

You panic, the anxiety of losing your comfort plushie too much for you to handle.

But you won't go to Zoro or anyone else for help, thinking that they'll just make fun of you.

Especially Zoro, he can be quite mean even unintentionally.

So you search all over the ship yourself, worry and fear steadily increasing.

You hoped and prayed no one else found it before you, because surely they would laugh at you and tease you to no end.

"Babe what are you looking for?" Zoro grumbles after a few hours of you refusing to cuddle him in favour of searching for your plushie. "And why is it so important?"

It helped you cope. With stress, with anxiety, with any problem you faced. It was comforting, and it relaxed you. Keeping it close made you feel secure, safe and sound. But you didn't tell him that.

You tried not to look too desperate, or else the others might ask you as well.

"This what you looking for?"

You almost died on the spot when you turned around to see your boyfriend holding your plushie up, a huge grin on his face.

"Zoro-"

"It's kind of cute, actually," he studied it. "But you have me, you know that right?"

You sighed and explained that this plushie was for when he was training, and you tried to get him to swear not to tell anyone but...

Zoro is a menace so he tells everyone.

SANJI

You know Sanji would not make fun of you for it, in fact he would probably think it's cute and compliment you and the plushie non-stop, but you still didn't tell him.

His compliments, although good-natured, would make you feel like a child, and you didn't want that embarrassment.

But searching for your plushie isn't easy, because the Sunny is huge.

So staying inconspicuous while looking for your comfort source is quite difficult, and there are moments when Sanji does suspect you're acting weirdly but you try to avoid him when he starts staring.

"Are you okay, my love?" He asks you every fifteen minutes, his concern growing by the second.

You laugh it off nervously, "Yes, love! Just making sure everything is clean."

At that point everyone knows something is off because who other than Franky and Usopp worries about the Sunny THAT much?

Eventually Sanji finds the plushie, but he's a bit confused. Is this what you're looking for?

To save you what he assumes would be embarrassment, since you haven't shown it to him before, he keeps it in your shared room and plans to ask you about it later.

When you don't find it by the end of the day, you feel like you want to cry. Your emotional support...gone. Just like that.

You don't expect to walk into your room and find Sanji sitting on your shared bed studying it curiously.

"Sanji," your eyes go wide, "Where did you find that?"

He looked up at you and smiled, "Under the bed! Is this what you've been looking for, my love? It's as cute as you are!"

You blush MADLY, walking over tentatively, "Please don't tell the others. They'll only laugh."

"I promise it's our secret," he grinned, then gave it back to you. "But love, you know you can come to me for anything, right?"

You smiled and nodded, kissing his cheek, relieved to have your plushie back with only one crewmember in the know.

LUFFY

You don't tell Luffy about your plushie because you're afraid he might steal it.

He's just childish in general, so you only worried about the others finding out.

When you lose it, you panic immediately thinking Luffy found it and took it.

Your anxiety worsened when you realised he might show it to the crew, because he hides absolutely nothing from everyone.

You can't ask him though...in fear of him not actually having it and then finding out.

Luffy doesn't notice your frantic searching, because of course he's too oblivious to.

You search every nook and cranny of the Sunny, dejection settling in when you still couldn't find it.

That is, until you walked in on Luffy holding it up while in the kitchen, and you thanked God that no one was around.

"Luffy!" You quickly grab it from him and cradle it against your chest protectively, glaring at him instinctively.

He pouted, "But it's cute! Tell me what it is, (Name), because it's almost as cute as you!"

You blushed, but told him anyway, "It's my emotional support plushie. But you can't tell anyone, Luffy!"

"But why do you need it? You have me!" He cheefully stated, theb frowned, "Why can't I tell anybody?"

"Because they will all laugh!"

He pouted more and agreed to not tell anyone.

You should have known better. He told everyone.

"LUFFY!"

LAW

Law already knows, sorry.

There is literally nothing you can keep hidden from this man.

But he pretends not to know, because he doesn't want to intrude on your privacy and he knows that if you wanted to tell him then you would have.

He also notices when you lose it and start searching the submarine whenever you could without arousing suspicion.

Bepo, Shachi and Penguin were nice but you knew the latter two would make fun of you.

"Are you okay, (Name)-ya?" Law's concerned voice startles you in the middle of turning your shared room upside-down in your desperate search.

You freeze, your eyes going wide, "Law-"

"You can tell me what you're looking for," he encouraged, "You can tell me anything, you know that."

You sighed and bit your lip, "Okay, it's this small, palm-sized plushie I use for comfort...I know it's childish-"

Law stopped you by holding something up - the plushie in question.

Your eyes widened, "Where did you- how- Thanks babe!" You smiled wide and reached for it, taking it gratefully and squeezing it to calm your nerves. "But can you please-"

"I won't say a word to anyone," he promised, sighing as he brought you close and wrapped his arms around you. "I know I'm not around as often as you'd like, but you still have me. You can still come to me. Okay?"

You smiled and nodded, "Okay."

"Good," he smiled and kissed the top of your head. "You're cute you know that? Cuter than that stuffed animal."

USOPP

Usopp, bless him, is the one who found your plushie before anyone else did.

But, curse him, he decided to withhold it until you asked for help finding it, because he sees how distraught you are and doesn't like it.

And he's sad that you don't trust him enough to tell him about it and that you don't trust him to have a mature reaction.

You look all over the Sunny, trying to be discreet so that no one asked you about what you were looking for.

And then you noticed the weird, hurt looks that your boyfriend was giving you, which made you frown.

Were you neglecting him in your search- no time for that, you had to find your plushie before someone else on the crew did, an outcome you dreaded most.

A few hours later, you were on the cusp of just giving up and sobbing, until Usopp walked up to you and handed your plushie to you.

"Usopp-"

"You could have told me," he frowned, "I would never make fun of you."

He started to walk away, but you stopped him.

"I know, I'm sorry," you sighed. "I just thought that it's so childish, I was too embarrassed to say anything."

"Well you shouldn't have been embarrassed cause it's not childish," he grinned, "It's actually cute and...oddly comforting."

"Right!" You smiled. "So you won't tell anyone?"

"Of course not! What do you take me for? I'm not Luffy!"

"Thanks babe."

[sea-of-dust]

MAKOTO YUKI x GN! Reader

Summary: Dating headcannons

N: I had this just rotting bro posting this with the event. Ik u don't read these angst jumpscare. Also DO NOT listen to Malice Mizer OR SWEET (p5) while reading fanfic or headcannons for this guy you'll cry 7 times

Hm? Is something your gonna hear alot. He notices everything. Sometimes he purposely doesn't push you to tell him, other times he's told by Yukari.

He knows when your troubled, you can tell when he knows what's going on as he tends to get a bit closer before going "hm?" You notice when he's trying to comfort you. Trying to be sneaky just makes it more obvious, it's even more odvious when he sneaks snacks to you near your door, like he isn't the first suspect.

"?" He lays his head on your shoulder slowly inching closer. "You look like you're fuming. Did something happen?" "Nothing much just a headache" "I see" you never feel his arms wrapped around while you as you stood next to him, soft hums comming from him.

Makoto tries to hide his affections in public. Limiting it to hand holding or subtle matching things you both had on your person. The fewer people the higher the chance of him taking a small snooze on your shoulder, you end up giving him piggybacks when he does this.

He let's you listen to music with him. At the cost of a small tease. "I wanna listen aswell..." You look away clearly flustered to ask this "and why would my dove want that?" "HUH" you look at him wide eyed seeing him smirk "BRO" "? I thought I was your boyfriend" and back to the straight faced s.e.e.s boy. This was his way of flustering you, calling you a random nickname and then acting like nothing happened, you always reset back to bro when he does this making it even better for him.

He wanders...alot. This guy would get lost in a supermarket and be like "oh I lost them..." and then find you calmly while you'd just panic about where he was. He always appears from nowhere when this happens. "I've looked everywhere jimpei I'm considering going into the fountain..." "you walk so fast" he burries himself into the nape of your neck, "I almost lost you again" you were so lucky jimpei was on the phone and not in person or you two would have never stopped getting teased when you got to school

If you ever wondered about s.e.e.s or ever wondered why he was always so tired, he'd act like he didn't hear you. "So what's s.e.e.s, heard it had something to do with some sorta time thing?" He'd be right next to you. You saw him peak up and just go back to staring into the void seconds later. "I know you heard me" you furrow your brows slightly but he just lays there for a bit moves his hair and then goes "huh?" "UGHHH" you're not getting him to budge

That would be the case if you didn't have a persona he'd still try to pretend he didn't know until you saved him from a few shadows. "How did you get knocked down by wind of all things imagine I blow and you and you get stunned" your persona deals with them easily while you help him up. "So what is this place my princess, my shawty bae, my-" "please...shut up" "nah baby girl you brought this on yourself" he sighs but he did enjoy the free piggy back ride so he pretended the wind hit him THAT hard.

"You're still carrying him around" Yukari cringes "he can barely keep his eyes open tho" "oh he'll live watch this" Yukari turns around "we're gonna go get a sna-" "don't say it infront of jimpei unspelled" he groans nuzzling back into your neck "told ya, get him off your back" easier said than done the guys like those theme park bracelets you'll never get him off. "Yukari let go of me" his voice a bit annoyed "no chance! Come on you gotta walk like the rest of us think of y/ns back!" You got him to walk...but he had to hold your hand and would almost drift off again if you haven't move away everytime you noticed. "Please try to stay awake were almost done" "...." You catch his head "don't lean on me, how about this you can rest once we get back to my room" he suddenly has enough energy to walk without leaning on you.

He loves whenever he goes to your dorm. It always feels so calm in there like some sorta checkpoint. Sometimes he gets there before you already laying there like it was his own room. "Welcome home" "oh minato- wait...howed you get in" "you left the door unlocked" "oh" he tries to use the 'just wanted to study with you excuse' nah the dudes there for every kind of sfw romantic thing you can think of. He's there to be called lover boy unironcally! "Funny how you aren't as sleepy during the night" you move closer to him "you're nocturnal" you joke playfully giving him a small kiss on the cheek. In actuality he had eaten a bunch of candy so he could stay awake with you.

Take him with you everywhere!! If you'd e-mail him about anything related to heading out you don't even have to invite him he'd just magically appear. You don't even have to say WHERE you're going. "How do you always know where I am?" "This place is small"

He'd know what your into without you telling him almost sniffing it out. "I thought you'd like this" he hands you a small gift watching you blush immensely. "Howed you know I liked this kinda stuff" "I figure stuff out quickly" he did have hints though. The way you acted the way you looked at things simular to it. it made it odvious you'd like one of those.

He hides when he's sick always trying to hold back coughs or sneezes he suffers in silence and would prefer it that way. Why? Because the first time he was sick infront of you or anyone else no one wanted to be around him incase it spread. You were willing to of course until Mitsuru put a ban on seeing him for the sake of everyone's health, you still got tests to deal with ya know! So now he just hides it trying to recover quickly. Can't say the same for you though "cough cough! Ah sorry I've had a really bad cold lately" all he needed to hear to have you carried back to your dorm after school. "When we're you able to manhandle me" "please take this" he hands you a small medicine cap expecting you to drink it from there. "It's just a cold" "colds don't have you coughing yourself into orbit for it to just be a casual one" sighing you gulp it down

He'll pretend to not know how to put on his ribbon and ask if you're able to help him. Then turn around pull it off and look at you with a "can you do it again" face. He just likes the way you tie it while you're on the train with him.

Fastest Emailer EVER. You'd think it would take him litteral years since he sometimes leaves people out to dry, according to jinpei, and then he'd respond at the speed of sound to you nearly as fast as the email sends.

You try to pitch his cheeks only to get him to revert to an angry cat. So you've resorted to softer smaller pinches, he dosent mind as much now just don't too it too often or he'll start pinching you too

He may like using yarn with you. Depends on how easy it is though. "What are you making?" "A heart bracelet a girl asked me to make for her and her boyfriend" he reaches for your hand "do you mind if I try this?" "Sure it's in the left drawer" he could barely make the heart at first but as soon as you got a clipboard involved it was a whole diffent story, he was a machine, you didn't know this at the time but you definitely accidently made a yarn bracelet monster. Must have found out they can be made into sp items. That's why there's a lock on the left drawer now, he never opened it without asking its just to keep him from getting ideas, it does the opposite

He has his flirtatious momments, mostly just because he wants to tease you. It starts with a perfectly silent momment, in the classroom when they finally let you sit with him, nearly asleep in a library, on very rare occasions tartarus, he'd smirk and then lock in for the absolute chaos he's about to cause. A simple lean into your ear whispering softly yet clearly "I want a kiss" your eyes would always widen but you'd also respond with a whisper back "now?" Clearly slightly baffled you kiss him on the cheek quickly. Oh but sometimes that isn't enough, sometimes he just wants to see you melt, rubbing his hand on your already flushed cheek he leans in drowsy eyes meeting yours "I want a bit more please" he does enjoy you cupping his face and kissing him. When he does stuff like that you thank the lord the sees memmbers split up or you two are pretty much alone together.

There are times he's tempted to kiss you and then act like he didn't do anything. Cheeks are his favorite you can barely see him comming,*chu*, and now he gets to tease you make you think he never did such a thing "stop kissing me while i study" "wadya mean" "you gotta study focus on that" "i wanna focus on you more" "huh?" Another quick kiss "you did it again" "i dunno what youre talking about" exhaling you kiss him under the eye "lets get back to studying before it gets too late" and then hed lean onto your shoulder. He wants you to catch him more often

"I bought a camera! Let's take a few snaps, just the two of us!, "I don't see why not" holding the camrea steady, you take a picture of the shell he found. *SNAP* a picture of him looking out on the beach. *SNAP* "Why are you taking so many of me?" "I want you to last forever" putting the camrea down and walking toward him, he reaches his hand out. "Oh sure" you give it to him and he holds it up, making sure you're both in frame. *SNAP* a picture with both of you smiling as the sun sets on the beach. Softly looking at your features, his eyes land on ur lips, then cheek, eyes, then back to your cheek again. Smiling to himself, he holds it up again "you mind if we take another?" "Alright" *SNAP* soft lips press your cheek the momment the camera flashes. "You mind if I get another, the picture might be a bit blurry" with a rare smile on his face he pockets the picture. You covering the cheek he had just kissed. "Sure..." still surprised you lean into him smiling as the shyness gets to you. *SNAP* another kiss, happy with the photo he turns to you. "Do you have any plans after this?" "No it's straight to the dorm for me" "perfect" "?"

As you two walk home after changing clothes, he seemed to be more bright than usual as you wondered why, you were happy you got to see him smile like that. "I have something for you" "really? Me too!" "I'll meet you in your room then" hugging you before he leaves to his room to pick up your gift you collect what you had gotten for him, a DVD, a small bag with candies, and a rare jack frost you had won that you've customized to look like him. As soon as he opens the door you try to hide your gifts behind your back. "I can see them" "No you cant" softly giggling to himself he closed the door and gave you a case with a small bag with it. "Well since you've already seen then" you slide over the minato frost with the other things on its lap. "I saw someone do it on the internet and wanted to make one of you..." averting his eyes afraid he may not like it. He grabs its hands, then it's crocheted hair "it looks just like me" he pulls its cheeks. "And this is what I got for you" giving you the case and small bag. You decide to open the case first. Inside was a pair of headphones and a music player the same model as his. "How'd you know I wanted one?" "You eye mine alot, so I just figured" without much thought, you kissed his cheek "I don't know if I could put into words how thankful I am" You kiss him again. Excitedly, you open the small bag, revealing a bunch of stickers. "I wanted to decorate this with you if you don't mind" "I don't see why not" you excitedly put the sticker on his face then the case almost 5 stickers later his face again. "You look so cute with them all over you" "right back at you" giggling at his joke, you cover the player carefully in stickers with him. He even showed you how he put his music onto them.

Eventually what nearly always happens when he's in your room happens, his soft eyes flutter shut while laying on your bed the frost that looks just like him in hand. *SNAP* *SNAP* the opportunity was just too good to pass up, one for you and one for him to wake up to. You lay next to him moving his hair as to see both eyes. "Sweet dreams" your eyes grow heavy as they close. Days were sweet after that though you did notice him being a bit more busy, you didn't even notice when January ended, and he was nowhere to be seen. You asked most of the people you knew that spoke to him but they just ended up near teary eyed or near unable to say a word about it. "He's in a coma" Jinpei finally is able to croak out, "we don't know what happened to him" you feel your heart drop at his words, near running to the hospital after school and laying by his side. He looked so peaceful, you'd wonder what he was experiencing. Holding his hand for what seemed like it could be the final time you left, it felt a bit scary walking home without him with you.

You put on the music player he gave you, all covered in stickers he helped you put on. "Burn my dread...full moon full life...memmories of-" you hault finding yourself at the dorm, you go in, putting your hands in your pocket, reminding you of him, accidently touching his spare key he gave you, your mind suddenly asked you to go into his room. It felt like snooping, but the thought just wouldn't let you go. Opening the door, you find something on his desk, a letter along with a few pictures. "I may have forgotten to ask someone to give this to you, but I hope it someday reaches you, I'm writing this just in case something bad happens to me, I'm gonna miss seeing you when I wake up and waking up before you. All those candies I ate from you because I wanted to stay up late, all the times I've gotten free piggyback rides around town. I'm gonna miss you above all. I'm sorry I took your camera" getting to that part you look at the pictures on the desk one of him sleeping with the frost you made him, one of you trying on his sees uniform. "To be fair you already seen most of them, I just thought that if anything happened you'd want some of me" scattering them multiple pictures of him trying on your accessories, pictures of him smiling widely at your favorite places, pictures of him trying diffrent hairstyles. "I've bought a replacement film in advance, if you need to you can take my jacket and the mako-frost. They'll keep you warm" You look at more pictures, pictures of you and him, the kiss at the beach, you napping on him, a picture of you crocheting. "If push comes to shove, don't forget about me, keep living on, Makoto ps: thanks for letting me get this close to you"

[robin-evry]

First of all, just want to say thank you for your hard work and I love them, keep it up! (But don't overwork yourself). If possible, my request will be Luz like reader in Twisted wonderland. (There is not enough TWST x TOH content and makes me sad.) Wether, they will be using glyphs or not? Your choice! Thank in advance ^^

Sure thing, ask and you shall receive

𝐓𝐖𝐒𝐓 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐀 𝐋𝐔𝐙 𝐘𝐔𝐔 💡📃

Luz Noceda is the protagonist of The Owl House. She is an eager, teenage Afro-Latina human, who accidentally stumbles upon a portal leading to the Boiling Isles. To prove herself as a witch, Luz begins learning magic under Eda's guidance, despite not having any magical abilities of her own

Luz!yuu would fit perfectly and adapt towards twst custom, I mean it's basically their world but with magic and mythical creatures.

Originally Crowley was about to reject them from entering the school, until they showed their glyphs magic to him and he allowed them to enter the school.

The ramshackle ghost and them get along very well. They help them clean the dorm as well help them with preparations. And protect them from any danger

Thanks to the new world, Luz is able to create more spells for their glyphs as well creating new ways to use magic.

When they meet malleus instead of fear he suspects it was amazed to be met by their eyes, Luz immediately starts to ask him questions and says how cool it was to meet a fae.

Malleus asks them if they had any dragon faes in their world, Luz!yuu says no they only have witches and demons in the boiling isle. They ask him to teach them some basic magic.

I imagine after being in twst for some point of time, some magic started to transport to them because since glyphs are magic it kinda mutated Luz!yuu to be able elemental magic.

And soon Crowley gave them a magic pen for them to use, they are still considered to be very strong by the other first years.

They are also very smart and managed to create a plan in the midst of battle making them a good leader.

Completed the braincell trio, it's basically the meme "Why is it, when something happens, it is always you three" said Crowley after them blowing up the lab due to Luz!yuu wanna make a potion and get an ingredient wrong.

Luz!yuu might be viewed to be weird by some of the students like riddle, Jamil etc. but they're not just weird they're just curious and wanted to learn

They would be so eager to learn everything, history, potionolgy and etc, Mr.trein and Mr.Crewel They are by far one of the most eager to learn students as a praise towards them

Have video games and movies with their closest friends. Teach them tales about the boiling isle as well their home dimension, about eda, king, amity and their other friends.

Sees grim as king 2.0, best friend to the end. Use grim like a pokemon. "Grim I chose you"

Their first encounter with Leona, is similar towards meeting malleus, they ask a bunch of questions and Leona finds them annoying

Lilia is grateful towards them being a friend to malleus. He also enjoys their optimistic personality and their curiosity.

Parties with kalim, Jamil is working 24/7 for both them do not died. He originally didn't like them due to their reckless personality that could let them into death or kalim death.

Even tho they are very optimistic, if someone posts a threat towards their closest friends, they would protect with all their might. Have a powerful will many students say.

[dangerliesbeforeyou]

ok so ive been rewatching psychoville and saw on the wikipedia that there were a bunch of websites made for the series (they were all written by reece and steve btw) which i've been looking through cos they are genuinely SO fucking funny & also just amazingly creative lol!

anyway i know people in the fandom probs already know about this (since the show came out literally 15 years ago pfft) but i thought i'd share some of my fav bits (but honestly would just recommend just checking them out if you haven't i have been crying with laughter for literally hours lol)

i will say that a lot of the media (videos, games, etc) no longer work on the archived sites rip but i'm sure people have uploaded some of the stuff (vids especially) to yt or other places lol

so a) i love that we get some background stuff on jelly and 2) 'captain CRACKERS' bernie clifton's dressing room reference question mark ??????? (ofc bcdr was AFTER this but i know love the idea that mr jelly trained under len pfft)

what that red raw stump do though 👀 (sorry pfffft)

mr jolly's website wasn't that interesting soz tho i did like him comparing being a doctor to being a clown lol

the comment about fag bears did make me wheeze i'm afraid lol i also loved the blurry photos of lomax's commodities lol (kinda reminded me of the bit in tlog w/ that terrible old photographer guy lol)

when i tell you i DIED with laughter at the 'now known as hull' bit like u just know reece wrote that bit pfft

not really a funny thing but this poem written by david honestly kinda breaks my heart lol... i think it also a lot of additional context to david's guilt when he thought he'd killed his father(faver) because perhaps he felt guilty about NOT feeling guilty you get me? like, it felt to me that when maureen told david it was SHE who killed her husband, it didn't feel like he was mad at her for doing it, but more that she kept the fact from him. it's about... the mutual oedipus-coded obsession with one another that couldn't even be destroyed in death and in this essay i will....

ghoul_lass23 is just like me but about tumblr lol fr

nothing feels more cursed than the phrases 'the river minge has burst its banks', 'crying creamy tears' and 'fleshy rapunzel' (which i've just noticed they misspelt lol... don't think that was intentional lol?) so if i had to read this so do you <3

the way that i kinda wish this actually existed tho pfft... also, it does kinda remind me of that video where jenny nicholson talked about that insane reality show 'opposite worlds' lol

'cross between seven and glee' is honestly sending me pfft

also on this part there was a script from stinkfinger (which is a show mentioned on the show) which sounded suspiciously like a reference to tlc lol

the less said about swastknickers the better

(will say i did nearly piss myself laughing at the nazi section of the hoity toity website lol which wasn't a sentence i thought i'd type today lol)

i just love these kinds of jokes pfft

also the whole biography sections of each of the pantomime cast are fab lol tho i AM kinda pissed they made debbie from yeovil and yet didn't give her a west country accent lol!!! (i guess they thought it'd be a bit much w/ joy being bristolian but i'm still mad about it lol)

also i know people have probably already pointed this out but i do find it funny that brian in the in9 episode last night of the proms is a closeted gay guy who likes watching drag was probably a reference to brian in this show that was a drag queen like... is anything these guys do NOT a reference??? u know those gaylor fans who obsessively look for clues in her songs about her apparent secret sexuality? all i'm saying is that i think they'd really like the extended reece shearsmith & steve pemberton universe pfft

all three of these made me cry with laughter lol

ohh this is interesting lol so obviously they suspected that some people might be all 'um why didn't the sprinklers go off during the fire at ravenhill? plot hole much!' so they wrote this into one of the websites so they could be like SEE! WE'RE ONE STEP AHEAD OF YOU DUMBASSES lol

both the jeremy kyle reference (remember when that was a thing? yikes... my mum used to watch his show CONSTANTLY...) and nurse kenshington's thoughts on david and maureen are interesting lol.. also there's a reference to the serial killer top trumps in this bit lol! (do people still play top trumps?? man i LOVED top trumps lol...)

the entire sunnyvale care home section is so fucking funny (both the website AND in the show lol mrs wren/mrs ladybird face is unironically probably my favourite character on the entire show) these were just some of my fav gags lol...

ok but why is this the SECOND reference to a guy punching a child who was apparently looking at his dick lol!??!! did this happen to one of you ??!!?!? reece did you punch a child ??!???!?!??

&&&& that's it lol

there were a few websites i didn't spend long on or generally weren't that interesting (coughmidgetgemscough) but honestly? i was really captivated with just how funny and well put together all these sites were! you can tell they had a lot of fun making it and i'm sure fans at the time LOVED being able to have this semi-interactive element of the show lol

there was just something so wonderfully late 00's about these websites lol i genuinely don't think i've laughed this much at anything in literal months and all of this is just solidifies that psychoville is a criminally under-appreciated masterpiece lol

[bloedewir]

Dragon Age: The Veilguard

There's some post-game thoughts I can mark as spoiler ones. Read only if you finished the game.

I love the game. Really. The grand finale was magnificent, the main plot idea is painfully touching and I adore the heavy weight of sorrow I bear after I finished the game. The best kind of bittersweet grief of possible.

However it doesn't mean the game is flawless. There's some stuff I didn't get at all.

Why there's no option to ask Solas about the Forgotten Ones? Like, hello, you have an encyclopedia of elven lore in your head, can't you ask a few optional questions about weird ancient guy you've met during the journey? Nadas Dirthalen? (Or it's because da5 is going to be about new dwarven and/or qunari lore and Forgotten Ones/Executors?)

You also can't say anything about the murals.. which is kinda strange. Why didn't Rook comment those mind-blowing revelations? For Harding, at least?

Evanuris. Solas' story is beautifully written, Mythal' story was also revealed more than before (even if she's in all 4 games) so we get to know her better. But Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain? Fine, forget other evanuris.. but the spectacular duo? Spirits and demons are kinda the same, like two sides of a coin. Solas is Wisdom and Pride, Mythal is Benevolence and Retribution (as Morrigan said). Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain are just.. bad? They're blighted and corrupted now but what about the past? Where's the duality of their personalities? No chance for redemption now because they don't want or need it, I get the idea, but the story itself? I wish there would be more about them. We do have something on Ghilan'nain tho, like: she created hallas but can't create them any longer and she has a full control over the Blight as if it's modeling clay (+ some Bellara' thoughts on a matter of "navigation" and "healing" and path Ghilan'nain chose for the People). But Elgar'nan? He likes tyranny. And he still had his hair. Uhm.. ┐⁠(⁠ ⁠∵⁠ ⁠)⁠┌

Romances. Can't say much because I didn't try all of them but Neve's and Lucanis'.. uhm. It doesn't feel like a written romance, y'know? Just a bonus lines so you doesn't have to feel lonely or whatever. Characters are on their own and don't have connection with Rook till the very end. There's no impact and Rook is, ironically, just an enjoyable side benefit™ but nothing more. Comparing to datv romance situation solavellan romance is hot as hell and full of content. And it says a lot.

Inquisitor. I do like how their absence was explained... yet Lavellan was robbed. I don't want to see a cringe Fade therapy session with Solas telling his tragic lovestory to a random stranger (Rook) and whining about just how much he misses his gorgeous wife (and I'm solavellan). But adding a few tiny details? The bare minimum: take the dai tarot card and place it on the wall in a music room. That already could've been much better. (mods mods mods 🤞🤞🤞).

Dialogue timing and triggers. I suspect dialogues are cool but I can't know for sure. In my first playthrough I didn't even know Davrin and Lucanis are not a big fans of each other before the Weisshaupt quest because I didn't hear it. DATV locations are much smaller than it was in DAI, so you just don't get the chance to hear those dialogues unless you find a trigger point and just stay there waiting to play all lines.

Some of that is not a tragedy and, theoretically, could be improved by magnificent people creating mods. But sometimes datv seems kinda unfinished like there's a missing puzzle pieces as if content was cut out with no replacement.

Despite some questionable moments and a bit of criticism I love this game regardless. It's dark and atmospheric, absolutely beautiful and mesmerizing. And analysis of Regret? Choices and consequences, acceptance, struggling, desperation, guilt..? The work Bioware did deserves to be highly appreciated. The final left me in tears, sobbing and grieving, and heartbroken - that's all I ever wanted of Dragon Age 💜

[acescorazon]

Crocodile x Mihawk x Buggy fic idea for you: Mihawk and Crocodile are stunned when they each discover both Yoru and Crocodile's gold hook missing. The both of them immediately suspect that Buggy did something. Pissed six ways to Hell they go looking for their "fearless leader". They find him in one of the workshops and all anger is replaced with astonishment when they find Buggy polishing Yoru to a radiant shine, while Crocodile's hook hand is already gleaming like it's been kissed by the sun itself. When they get closer, Mihawk is quietly stunned to see that Buggy has gone so far as to rewrap the hilt of the strongest blade in brand new gleaming white leather. Buggy does his best to be non-chalant as he explains that he simply wants his " Lieutenants" looking their best as he hands Crocodile his hook and assures Mihawk he's almost done polishing Yoru. The gesture actually shifts Mihawk and Crocodile's attitude towards Buggy after that. Before he knows it, Buggy is the one getting stunned when he winds up with the world's strongest swordsman and the former but still formidable leader of Baroque Works declaring that they are both in love with him and mean belong to him just as much as he does to them. Cue the absolute chaos that somehow becomes a genuinely loving throuple and a true for to be reckoned with in the pirate world.

IK WE'VE ALREADY TALKED BUT HI AGAIN POOKIE LOL. Anyways this is going to be another one of the requests i turn into a little series, if you didn't see the post where i went into more details click here. (That's if you want to, you don't have to LOL.) ALSO PT2 this is going to be the series i was talking about where i'm going to try and experiment with alternating POVS as mentioned here.

Anyways i hope everything goes well, and i'm going to debut the first three chapters before we get into anything serious, (but again, as mentioned before, i want everyone's feed back please so i know this is something yall might want again in the future. ((OR MIGHT NOT LOL) ) ) I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS THO POOKIE AND ILY MUAHHHHH.

AWYWHOREEEEEE LETS GET IT.

Title: Buggy's guide to bagging boyfriends

Ch: 1/?

Rating: PG-ish for now ig (But let's talk later about it.)

Word count: 2835

Chapter except:

The room fills with tension as the two other members of Cross Guild glare at him, and Crocodile is the first to speak up, “Where’s my damn hook?!” He asks, and even though it's first thing in the morning, his voice is still, loud, deep, and intimidating, and he doesn’t sound like he’s in a good mood… but, then again, Buggy doesn’t think he ever is. Mihawk follows suit, asking his own question afterwards in a significantly quieter, yet equally as intimidating voice, “...And why do you have my sword?”

Well, so much for the surprise...

It’s not like Buggy’s a workaholic or anything like that, he’s far from it actually. It’s just that even after he’s done doing his duties for the day, he often finds it hard to shut his brain off at night. He often tosses and turns in his bed, thinking about what he has to do in the morning or for the week, and sometimes finds himself wanting to get a head start on things. Tonight, he finds himself in another one of those situations, unable to sleep no matter how hard he tries because he keeps on thinking about Cross Guild and all that he has to do.

He has to have new weapons and medical supplies ordered, and he also has new men to welcome into the crew, each of whom he has to find a job for because Mihawk and Crocodile, while skilled in many things, aren’t big fans of doing the more simple tasks; like assigning their men jobs or giving them pep talks, or sending their families money after they’ve made an enemy out of themselves for attacking the marines. Damn, he has more bounties that need to be made too, and he has old ones that need to be taken off the market.

There’s so much to do, and part of him wants to go to sleep, but another part of him also wants to get back up and get right back to work again. It’s weird. 

Two, three, and then four o'clock, quickly passes him by as he continues to think about all that he has to do. He feels full of energy right now despite the fact that prior to lying down, he felt exhausted. He kept yawning and could barely keep his eyes open, but now, as he lies in his bed, it seems like he can’t fall asleep no matter how hard he tries. It seems like his previous exhaustion was just a sick prank his brain played on him. Thanks, brain. He continues to think about Cross Guild, he wasn’t exactly serious about it before. He was more or less just in it because he needed to repay his debt to Crocodile, but now… Well, he can’t say it’s the worst thing in the world. 

It has its cons of course: Mihawk and Crocodile are always bullying him, plus they make him run around like a chicken with its head cut off, doing what could only be considered more of a manager role than the big boss role, but Buggy kind of enjoys it actually. It makes the days go by a little quicker because he has so many things to do and men to look after these days, and he thinks his responsibilities are only going to grow in the future. 

His thoughts shift slightly, and he goes from thinking about all the things he needs to do to thinking about his ‘subordinates’ and his relationship with them. Buggy’s always had a rather rocky relationship with Mihawk and Crocodile but…It’s not like he would be opposed to being their friend or anything like that, the two just never seemed interested in anything other than a work relationship (or beating him up.) But maybe if Buggy actually put in an effort to be their friend, they could fix things and this Cross Guild thing could really kick ass! Perhaps if he did something nice for them, they’d stop hating him and see that Buggy’s not that bad of a guy after all. 

Should he do that? 

He finds himself wondering if he should just give this whole Cross Guild thing his all, you know, make the best out of a bad situation because he’s not going anywhere any time soon… Maybe there are ways to make his, Mihawk, and Crocodile’s relationship better, like, maybe he could get them all matching red cloaks, that’d make them look like a flashy team, right?? Okay, they’d probably kill him on the spot if he did something like that. Oh, uh, maybe he could gift them some sake! Wait…They’re kind of snobby and only drink aged wine or some crap. Uh, uh… what could he do for them? 

A sudden idea pops up in Buggy’s mind and he glances over at the clock by his bedside again, wondering how in just a few short seconds it went from four in the morning to almost six. Gah, time doesn’t make sense, but that doesn’t matter right now.

What are the most important things to Crocodile and Mihawk? Why, it’s their hook and sword of course! Well, actually, he’s pretty sure the most important thing to Crocodile is money and power, but that doesn’t matter! What if he shined their things for them!! That would be nice, wouldn’t it? And then they would definitely stop hating him and being mean to him, right? They’d have to! They’ll want to be his best friend if he does something that nice!! Buggy will give Crocodile’s hook and Mihawk’s sword a nice shine, and then they’ll be all like, ‘Oh, my god, Buggy. You’re so amazing, you’re so wonderful, you’re so sexy and smart, we love you!!!!’ Okay, wait, they probably won’t do the last thing, but Buggy can hear their praises now.

God, he’s so smart. 

Buggy hops out of bed, quickly gets himself dressed, and then makes his way out of his tent. The island feels so calm and peaceful right now as his men continue to sleep in the early morning hours. Everything is deserted and quiet, and Buggy enjoys the scenery, finding Emptee Bluffs island the most beautiful during early summer mornings such as this. Buggy just so happens to notice that the sun is just barely beginning to peek over the horizon as he heads to Crocodile’s tent first, and he takes a moment to admire its beauty before continuing on with his tasks. He's so excited for this! He’s going to have two, not one, but two, super cool best friends!   

As Crocodile’s tent comes into view, Buggy’s heart starts pounding in his chest because, despite knowing he has nothing but good intentions, he knows that if Crocodile were to discover what he plans on doing, then he’d wring his neck for sure. So, he quietly sneaks into Crocodile’s tent, and in his room, he can just barely make out the soft sounds of snoring coming from over at his bed. Perfect, Buggy thinks, hoping that there might be a chance that Crocodile doesn’t sleep with his hook on, and as he crouches down and makes his way slowly across the dimly lit room, he notices the object of his desire lying right on top of Crocodile’s nightstand. 

Perfect. He’s going to be so surprised! Buggy’s going to just take this for a little while, but he’s going to make sure he returns Crocodile’s hook, and of course, Mihawk’s sword, before either of them realizes that their belongings have even gone missing! 

Buggy quickly snatches up Crocodile’s hook, clutching it close to his chest, and then goes after his next target: Yoru. He thinks things might be a little more difficult considering that Mihawk may very well be awake at this time since he seems like an early riser, and Buggy has often seen him taking morning walks around the island or getting a cup of coffee from the cafeteria. It’ll be alright though, maybe he’ll be asleep or out of his tent. Buggy wastes little time making his way over to Mihawk’s tent, peeking his head in first to see if he’s awake or even inside, and when he realizes that his tent is empty, but Yoru is resting against the side of his bed, he grins, grabbing Mihawk’s beloved sword and quickly making a run for it.  

Buggy can try to hide Crocodile’s hook but, obviously, it’ll be a little hard given its size, but there’s no way that he could possibly hide Mihawk’s sword, so he makes a quick run for it towards one of the island’s workshops, grunting on the way there from the sheer weight of both items. He looks around the shop once he’s inside, searching for some polishing cream and a rag, and struggling for a moment because he doesn’t usually come to this place. Usually, he just stops by for a few minutes to check up on his men, so he doesn’t know where anything is. Everything is so familiar yet unfamiliar at the same time, but he eventually finds what he needs and begins working on his surprise, having a seat on a stool and polishing Crocodile’s hook first.

He grunts again as he holds the heavy metal in his hands, wondering how Crocodile can even use this as a prosthetic with how heavy it is. He thinks it has to be at least a good thirty pounds alone, but that’s none of Buggy’s concern, he just took it so that he would be able to give it the shine it needs. Not only does giving this bad boy a good shine seem nice, but wouldn’t it be cooler if Crocodile engaged in battle with the Marines or even one of the mighty four emperors (not Buggy though.) and he had the coolest, most shiniest, most bad ass hook the world’s ever seen?!

Hell yeah, it would be! Crocodile is going to look so freaking cool thanks to Buggy!!! 

He polishes the hook once, but it honestly doesn’t look shiny enough the first time around, so Buggy decides to polish it again, and then actually a third time because he wants that bad boy to shine like a diamond…even though it’s gold. It doesn’t matter, he just wants it to look pretty. He wants it so shiny that light will bounce off it and blind people, that’s how shiny he wants Crocodile’s gold hook to be, and as he finishes polishing it, he smiles to himself, now a little sweaty because of the poor ventilation in the workshop. 

Buggy moves on to Yoru next and as he holds the sword up, he once again takes the time to mentally complain about the pure weight of the object alone, wondering how Mihawk carries the damn thing on his back all the time without having any problems. He must have a spine made out of steel.

(Buggy wishes he could say the same.)

Buggy stares at the sword, admiring its beauty for a moment before lying it down on the workbench in front of him, he notices as he begins to polish the blade that the bandages around the hilt are a little ragged and dirty now, most likely from how much its owner uses it, and Buggy gets another idea in his head at that moment, wondering if there’s anything that he can rewrap the hilt of the sword with. He figures that he’ll worry about that a bit later though as he begins to polish Yoru, and just like with Crocodile’s hook, Buggy can’t help but think that the sword would look so much cooler and prettier if it was shinier. Like, yeah, it’s already stunning, but it just needs that extra layer of flashiness to really make it stand out, and so he takes his time polishing the blade, shining it until it’s bright and pretty, and so dazzling it makes Buggy’s eyes hurt, and once he’s done he looks for something to rewrap the hilt with. 

It takes him a little while, but he does eventually find some white leather that he thinks could probably be used to wrap the hilt with, and he begins to unwrap the bandages from around the sword, which, by the way, takes a whole lot longer than Buggy thought it would.  He eventually manages to get the bandages wrapped around the hilt off though, and then proceeds to wrap, and unwrap, and then wrap the sword again. He does this several times because this too, isn’t as easy as he thought it would be, but he slowly starts to figure out how to make the leather around the hilt look juuuust right...When all of a sudden, he hears loud, quick footsteps coming from the outside of the tent, but he figures it's just his men ready to start their day. 

How long have I been here? Buggy wonders as he continues to wrap Yoru’s hilt. He doesn’t have a watch on him, but he doesn’t feel like he’s spent that much time in the workshop, maybe because he’s genuinely enjoying himself and likes the idea of possibly making Mihawk and Crocodile happy? 

“Hey, Clown, you in there?!” 

Buggy pauses in an instant. Crocodile…? He wonders, taking a moment to figure out who the gravelly voice that just called out to him belongs to. Oh no! The surprise, it’s going to be ruined if he doesn– 

Too late. 

Mihawk and Crocodile come barging into the tent, both red in the face and looking like they want to snap Buggy’s neck but to be fair, they always look like that. Buggy pauses for a moment and stares up at his two chief officers, unsure of how to explain himself now that he’s been caught. Damn it, he really thought that he could get everything done before they realized their stuff was missing!! Seriously, how long has he been in the workshop?!

The room fills with tension as the two other members of Cross Guild glare at him, and Crocodile is the first to speak up, “Where’s my damn hook?!” He asks, and even though it's first thing in the morning, his voice is still, loud, deep, and intimidating, and he doesn’t sound like he’s in a good mood… but, then again, Buggy doesn’t think he ever is. Mihawk follows suit, asking his own question afterwards in a significantly quieter, yet equally as intimidating voice, “...And why do you have my sword?”

Well, so much for the surprise... 

Buggy places Yoru down for a moment as the other two former warlords approach him, and he notices how their expressions go from unbridled rage to pure confusion in a moment’s notice as soon as they get a little closer to him. He stands up and picks up Crocodile’s hook first and hands it to him, “I know I shouldn’t have taken your stuff,” He admits, and both Mihawk and Crocodile’s confusion only seems to grow, “But I just suddenly thought to myself: ‘Wow, i want to do something nice for them so that maybe we could be friends…and that you guys would look so cool if your weapons were all clean and shiny…” He chuckles lightly for a moment, trying to find the right words to explain how he got ahead of himself, but everything was all out of the goodness of his heart.

 

 “Seriously, guys, i was hoping that i could get everything polished before you even noticed your things were gone, but obviously that didn’t happen…” He sighs, rubbing the back of his head, “But, yeah, i wasn’t trying to make you guys mad or anything, just wanted you to look cool and to be friends!”

There’s absolute silence after Buggy’s explanation. Crocodile looks down at his hook, twisting and turning it in his hand as he examines it, and then suddenly he mutters a quiet, “Whatever, just don’t steal it again.” before he makes his leave, and honestly… Considering this is Crocodile we’re talking about, Buggy feels like things went a lot better than they could have… but still, he’s a little disappointed at that reaction. Was Crocodile’s hook not shiny enough? Or is he just really upset that Buggy stole his hand in the first place? Ah, shucks… Maybe he messed up. Maybe he should have done something else for him instead…Is his relationship with Crocodile going to be even more strained because of this? 

Aw, man. He hopes not! 

Buggy turns to Mihawk next, who is still staring at him speechlessly with wide eyes. He gives him a small, little smile, hoping that he hasn’t screwed things up with Mihawk too, “Uh, no offense, but the bandages around your sword were a little worn out, so uh, i thought i’d rewrap your sword too. I’m almost done, just give me a second,” Buggy tells him and then sits back down on the stool he was using, quickly finishing his job and wrapping Yoru’s hilt tightly, and afterwards he stands back up and gives Mihawk a proper grin, hoping that he might be a little more appreciative of his gift. “There! All done,” He says, handing the sword back to its owner. 

Mihawk continues to just stare at him even after he gets his sword back, and honestly, Buggy didn’t do any of this for a thank you or praise, even though that would be nice, he did this because he genuinely wanted to change things between him, Hawkeye, and Crocodile…So, he’s a little shocked when Mihawk simply sighs before quickly leaving the workshop too, not even saying another word to Buggy.

…So, are they not going to be super cool best friends?

((A/N: Hopefully this isn't ASS.))

[sunsetsover]

ok so gut reaction thoughts after first watch of ep 2 before i forget them

i knew the moment babe mentioned obstacles that kant had paid that guy from the preview to flirt w bison. like he really is kinda sleazy bc i don't get the impression that he's interested in bison at all but he DOES wanna fuck fr. but im kinda obsessed bc obv he's trapped in this situation and is trying to do what he has to to protect himself and his brother but there's something desperate about him and i don't know where it comes from. like i feel like there's still a piece of the puzzle im missing that will make me go 'ah i get it now' when i see it and i need it asap otherwise it might drive me crazy

speaking of getting it now i had a lot of thoughts about romantically naive bison last week that i didn't really talk about bc of the whole power thing that was a lot more interesting for me to sink my teeth into but like. i feel like i Get it now. i see where this is going, i understand how this can spiral out of bison's control

bc i still do think he has power in the sense that i still do think he suspects kant and thinks he can handle the situation alone but i also think that bison has been so sheltered that kant's attention and interest is getting to him a lot more easily than i think he thought it would. like there were moments in this ep that felt a lot more real from bison, like they were actually him and not this persona he's putting on with kant. i think he's kind of becoming a lil enamoured w kant and his audacity and his persistence and flirtation and that that's gonna snowball until suddenly he's caught in the web he's helped to weave and he really does like kant and it really does hurt and then bison's gonna flip out

(and i think with kant it's gonna be a much slower burn in terms of actual feelings, which is gonna make the heartbreak sooo much worse. i can't wait tbf)

and fadel is the exact same as bison in that aspect btw. like for all his 'trust no one, everyone is out to get you' bs all it took was a couple of weeks (if that) of consistent pressure and attention and someone not being scared off for him to find himself in way out of his depth. the only real difference between him and bison is that he has the self awareness to know that it's stupid and dangerous. he knows when people and feelings get involved there's only so much damage control you can do. bison's still naive enough that he thinks he can play with that kind of fire and not get burned by it, whereas fadel seems to know better.

(i have many many thoughts abt fadelstyle but i feel like i still need to process to articulate them properly)

kant catching onto bison calling his mum 'mother' and bison's face and obvious lie abt it when kant pointed out how weird that is goes into another thought i had last week which is that 'mother' really is less of an actual mother and more of a boss which makes me think bison lied and that he and fadel probably really were adopted, (maybe rescued from some of the 'bad people' she obviously has an issue with?) maybe even w the intention of raising them into being her weapons instead of her children. i bet she uses affection and/or guilt as a tool to get them to comply (which i'd bet works more effectively on fadel than bison) and do what they're told. if they literally owe her their lives or she 'saved them' from a bad situation, ofc she's gonna use that to get them to do her bidding. it also might explain why both boys r so susceptible to the attention and affection they're both getting even tho they should both know better - if they've been starved of it as children, they're going to be more desperate for it (and vulnerable to it) as adults.

also surprisingly i don't think the bdsm thing between kant and bison is actually going to be necessarily sexual in nature, not exclusively. at least not at first. like the fact that in the preview bison was like 'will you let me continue what i started at the tattoo parlour?' (meaning the nipple clamps) implies there was no finishing it if you catch my drift. like it seems as though it's gonna be less of a 'let me tie you down and hurt you a lil while we fuck' and more a full blown Dynamic ygm. like bison's really gonna be out here nipple clamping that man just bc he can. bc kant's gonna let him. which is not what i expected? not in a bad way but i guess im pleasantly surprised that it seems like it's gonna have that much depth to it.

(and if i'm right doesn't that just emphasise how it's less of a sex thing and more of a power thing for bison? he's not doing it exclusively to get off, it's obviously more than that for him.)

but also the look on kant's face makes me think that the ppl who said that bdsm isn't necessarily kant's thing but that he goes along with it bc it's what bison wants were right. which is so interesting to me, i cannot wait to see how that shakes out.

im kinda losing steam but fadelstyle truly made my brain itch this episode . i feel like i understand style way better bc i too want to chase fadel down and pin him in a corner and break him just to see what'll come out of him. i bet its real soft and real weird and might make me cry a little bit. i bet fadel would also cry. i bet he might need to real bad.

[erikiara80]

About Will

Last year the Duffers said that in S5 Will takes center stage again, and now they're even telling us how the season starts, with the flashback of Will in the UD. That's why I think the reveals about him should be huge, like the ones about Henry and El in S4.

This makes me happy. Will and his story are my favorite thing, and I have so many questions.

Was Will really just in the wrong place at the wrong time, a random victim who later became the brother of Vecna's actual target, Eleven?

Maybe. But I'll be honest, I think this would be disappointing. Most of the audience already believes that. All these years, all the mystery surrounding Will, and in the end it was just to hide Vecna, who was introduced in S4, so when we see S5 it's not even a plot twist anymore? Hm.

There could be an interesting parallel with Henry winding up in Dimension X tho. Wrong place at the wrong time. But Henry developed powers. What about Will, who ended up in the UD? Also, if he was just in the wrong place, why did they make his abduction so different from all the other attacks? It's just because it was the first one and they wanted it to be cool? Again, disappointing, imo. And if the reason was just "make the scene cool", I don't know why in other seasons they kept making parallels between the Demogorgon opening the Byers' door, something it only does in 1x01, and El opening a LOT of doors with telekinesis.

I think it's more likely that Will's flashbacks in S5 will be like El's flashbacks in S4. They made us believe that Eleven killed all the other numbers, only to reveal later that it's not what really happened. I expect something like that for Will too. Maybe at first, everything seems to confirm that he was just a random victim, and then we find out that it's not true. Or he was a random victim, but then, like Henry, he developed psychic abilities.

Speaking of that

Does Will have powers or not?

I am a Will-has-powers truther, this is not a mystery lol. But does it make sense in the story? (some thoughts here) Does he have powers like Harry Potter, or the Turtle (here), or Bastian, or he's like Peter Bishop, Marty McFly and Frodo Baggins? Noah said that Will's superpower is his heart, but you know, you can have that and also powers. Plus, in S4 they connect the concept of time travel to emotions, so if there's a timeloop or something like that, and Will's name is on the grandfather clock...

Maybe his abilities are different from anything we've seen. Maybe something more connected to the UD. I'm just saying, why making him a wizard/cleric, if he's just a normal kid?

For example, they never really explained why he's still so connected to Vecna and, I suspect, the UD (because he is also like Radagast, and the kid in Poltergeist, who gets kidnapped because of her powers) Yes, Max seems to have answered that question: when Vecna makes a psychic connection, you are marked. In fact, at some point she even says that she can still feel him. But when she's in his mind lair, she doesn't feel his thoughts. She says that he was surprised and didn't want her there... but he actually says that. Also, they would really answer the questions about the big mystery of Will's connection to Vecna like that, when he's not even the focus of the scene?

That's why I think the answer is more complex for him. Max can't feel Vecna's thoughts or feelings, Will can, like Harry can feel Voldemort. Could the reason be that he was connected to the hive mind? We can't be sure, he's the only one who survived a possession. There are no particles left in his body (as far as we know) or he would've died in S2. So, why is the connection still there and so strong, that the moment he's back in Hawkins, he can feel that Vecna is hurting and wants to destroy everything?

Why in S2 Will knows that the evil wants to kill everyone but him? And why would Vecna/Mind Flayer want to kill everyone but a random kid with no powers, whose only ability was to hide from a monster for a week? Henry Creel considered all the lab kids, people with powers, inferior to himself and Eleven, but for some reason he wanted a sensitive child who's just good at hiding? It doesn't make sense to me.

In the game, they seem to give us the answer. Well, they don't explain if Will was just in the wrong place at the wrong time on Nov 6, but they say that the reason he is the key and Vecna wants him, is that he wants to use him to find Eleven.

Ok

If this is true... Henry/Vecna needed Eleven to open a door, so he makes her make a psychic contact with a Demogorgon. When the gate opens, he lets the creature kidnap/kill random people. Then realizes that he can find Eleven, if he uses the only victim he is letting hide in the UD because, reasons. But when she finally is in the void with Will, instead of killing her, he interrupts the contact with Will, goes to Castle Byers, takes him to the library, and impregnates him with a little Demogorgon. And then? What would've happened if Joyce hadn't found Will? We still don't know if the tendril was killing him or giving him oxigen, like the facehugger does in Alien (the parallel with Sarah could be a hint tho), because we don't know what happened to Barb. If she died in the pool and then was taken to the library, or if it's the tendril that killed her.

If Will was actually dying, then the answer in the game doesn't make sense. If Vecna just wants to use him to find and kill Eleven, he wouldn't have tried to kill him. Unless that whole process was supposed to turn Will into Zombie Boy, a creature of the UD, similar to Vecna, who could find Eleven. That's a bit complicated, tho.

Not to mention the whole possession in S2. Again, let's say that Vecna didn't want to kill Will in the library, but just turn him into a monster. He failed. So, when Will is home, he makes him have visions, then possesses him, with the intent of killing everyone but him. Because he wants him to find and spy Eleven. But in the 1959 flashback, in TFS, and in the game, we see that Henry can read any mind. So, sorry but why does he need Will, specifically, to find Eleven?

Also, if the particles can just possess you in a vision and then appear in our world, why didn't they possess more people? Easier to find El, and even if you lose Will, you still have the others. It's what the Mind Flayer does in S3. The big difference? In S3 the particles are already in our world.

So I wonder if Will is the only one Vecna/Mind Flayer can possess like that, because they were already connected before the possession

Ok, in S3, the Mind Flayer takes a guy named William because he was in the wrong place at the wrong time. And then he uses him to build a monster that finds Eleven and takes her powers. So, maybe the 'wrong place, wrong time' is true, but the rest... is interesting. Jonathan says that they built Castle Byers the way Will drew it, and MindFlayer!Billy tells Billy to build what he sees. Also interesting that there are two Billies. It reminds me of If I go there will be trouble, and if I stay it will be double (different timelines, twin imagery, Henry and Edward, Richard and Martin. And Will and Eleven?)

So, my theory is that Will and El are more connected than it seems, and that's why Vecna needs Will. And maybe he is also using him to "build" his army, and make the UD spread? I don't know.

But for all these reasons, I think it would make more sense if Will wasn't just a random victim, or at least he's developed some ability.

Will has parallels with Cerebro (here) and Nancy says that the lights came to life when he was in the UD, a parallel to what Steve says in S3, (Let there be light) after Will senses the Mind Flayer for the first time at the mall. When he's watching a zombie movie. There's also that beautiful theory (I don't remember who posted it, sorry) about Will being connected to the light particles and using them to destroy the black particles of the Mind Flayer.

Light particles that look like fairy dust -> Will being called fairy. Lights that come to life -> a battery

I think I've found some big hint that this theory might be correct. Anyway, it seems that Will is connected to the very existence of the UD. Not saying he created it, but if lights came to life when he was there, maybe if they interrupt the connection, that place, whatever it is, will cease to exist.

[canirove]

Friends, lovers… and an orange | Chapter 14

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Masterlist

"I hope your birthday present is the best one ever. I deserve it after tonight" Adele sighed when the car dropped her and Mason at the hotel where they were staying, the launch of his perfum and everything that came with it finally over.

"Thank you very much for this, Addie. It means a lot."

"You're welcome" she said, taking his hand on hers. Holding hands had become something they now did without thinking, something that had become normal and organic for them.

"And about your birthday present… I wasn't going to say anything until tomorrow, but fancy an Italian road trip?"

"A road trip? Where?"

"It's a surprise" Mason smiled, his dimple showing. 

"But when are we leaving? Tomorrow?"

"The day before. Tomorrow is a day to relax and recharge."

"I don't know if I'll manage to relax or even sleep knowing that you are taking me somewhere."

"You've been as worried about the launch party as I've been, Addie. So the moment you get into your room, you'll instantly fall asleep. But try to make it to the bed first" Mason smirked.

"It'll try" Adele laughed. "Same goes to you, tho."

"I'll do my best. And here we are" he said, stopping in front of her room's door. "Breakfast tomorrow?"

"Breakfast tomorrow" she smiled.

"Ok."

"Ok."

"So… ummm… Good night, Addie."

"Good night, Mase" she said. Though neither of them moved, their hands still linked together. 

"Good night, Addie" he repeated, finally moving and kissing her cheek. Her cheek, or the corner of her mouth, the feeling making her knees go weak. "I'll text you when I'm up."

"Ok" Adele whispered, still trying to process how close his lips had been to hers.

"Good night, Addie. For the third time" he laughed.

"Good night, Mase" she said, frozen in place as she watched him walk towards his room. As he opened the door, he looked at her one last time, giving her a smile that made Adele's stomach flip inside her and that she was pretty sure would show up in her dreams. And it did.

She dreamt about that smile and about his lips almost on hers. Though maybe not just almost…

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"Mason, is that… no! It can't be!" Adele said as she looked out the window. They had been on the road for a few hours, laughing and singing their hearts out to the playlist he had made especially for this trip with all their favourite songs. 

"Do you recognize this town?"

"Of course I do! My dad took a photo of us looking at something on our cameras in front of that church! I actually printed it and have it in my room."

"What? Why? It is such a random photo" he laughed.

"I don't know. I like it" Adele shrugged. "I have many others from that summer printed. It was one of the best of my life."

"Same" Mason smiled. Though he suspected she didn't remember it for the same reasons he did.

"If we are here… does it mean…"

"Maybe" he smirked.

"Oh my God, Mase. Please tell me you managed to do it. Please, please, please."

"You must be patient, little padawan."

"Little what?" she laughed. 

"Just be patient, ok? It'll be worth it."

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"And?"

"It was worth it" Adele smiled as she looked at the view. Somehow, Mason had managed to rent the same villa where them and their families had spent the summer when they were sixteen.

Their parents' original idea had been to do a road trip around Italy, but they soon realized that doing it with two teenagers and two early teens, would not be the dreamy vacation they were expecting. Instead, they rented a huge villa in a small town, which turned out to be exactly what they all needed. 

"How did you come out with this idea?" she asked him.

"The perfume" Mason smiled. "Since we were already in Italy for the launch party and it was your birthday month, I thought it would be cool to remember the summer that inspired it all."

"So a whole month in Italy, away from everything and everyone?" Adele said, a big grin on her face.

"And just the two of us" he smiled back. "At least until our families arrive to celebrate your actual birthday. Do you think we'll make it?"

"What?"

"To your birthday. Do you think we will survive spending so much time together just the two of us, or that we will end up hating each other?" Mason chuckled. Though there was something in his voice that made Adele think he wasn't completely joking.

"There is nothing like trying" she replied, taking his hand on hers and giving it a squeeze. "Should we go for a tour around the house? I want to check what they have changed."

"You mean you want to see if they painted over your graffiti" he laughed.

"It was an accident, and it was all your fault" she said, pointing at him with their joined hands. She had been painting her nails in her room and minding her own business when Mason, Luca and Alex decided to scare her, which ended up with the little bottle of red paint all over the wall. They tried to clean it and cover it, but they only made it worse. "You better not try anything like that again if you want to make it alive to my birthday."

"I won't, I promise" he smiled. 

And he kept his promise, making the following two weeks and a half basically perfect. They had even found themselves following a routine, feeling as if they were actually living there, as if that was their real life.

They would wake up in the morning and go for a run before it got too hot. Once they were back in the villa, they would make breakfast and eat it while catching up on everything that had happened in the world. Then it was time for a quick shower before going into town to do some grocery shopping, most people saying hello to them as if they had been living there for years, some even remembering them from when they had visited for the first time. "It is impossible to forget women as gorgeous as your mothers" one man had said. 

After making lunch and eating it in the garden, they would either take a nap or just chill, most times falling asleep on each other's arms. And then it would be time to go for a swim, sometimes to the little beach hidden just a few kilometres away from town, sometimes in the big swimming pool the villa had. 

It had been during one of the days where they had stayed in, that Adele had noticed Mason's eyes following her every move as she got out of the pool and laid down in her hammock.

"Mase, are you checking me out?" she asked him, finding the courage to do it God knows where.

"What? No, no, no, no" he quickly said.

"Then why are you so red?" 

"The sun. I guess I didn't put on enough suncream" he shrugged. "Anyway, I think I should probably go for a dip too."

"Sure" she replied, trying to hide a smile.

After that day, they would constantly tease the other about it. And especially at night, when they would go into town to have dinner and enjoy the night, and make themselves look a bit more presentable.

"Addie, are you checking me out?" 

"I'm sorry, Mase. But those trousers make your bum look so good…" she had said. Which wasn't a lie.

"That dress also makes your boobs look really good" he had smirked, his eyes going down to her chest and making Adele's cheeks turn on fire. Which was what Jourdan was telling her over facetime after she had finally confessed her feelings for Mason and everything that was going on in Italy. That they were playing with fire.

"Addie, you like each other. You are falling in love with each other. And if you don't talk about it, it may come back to bite you in the ass. Yours and his very nice one. Have you seen his new underwear campaign?"

"Daily and in real life" she chuckled. 

"Lucky bitch" Jourdan said. "But I'm serious, Adele. Talk to him before your parents arrive and things get out of hand, messy, or both."

"I'll try" she sighed.

"No, you won't try. You will."

"Fine. I will" Adele replied. 

But will she? Will she find the courage to do it? Because their families were arriving in just two days, and she was running out of time.

[magentagalaxies]

"tour of duty" (the filmed version of their 2002 tour) in general is just kind of a bizarre point for kids in the hall that i haven't really talked to any of them about but is hard not to notice when you look at their entire canon. like it's certainly good - there are some tour-original sketches that i highly enjoy and some live versions of filmed sketches that take a fun creative spin on it, but in general things just feel noticeably strange.

buddy cole specifically tells the fur trappers to "fuck off" (buddy very rarely swears and across all the buddy material i've watched for the documentary he's only said "fuck" 3 times across forty years). danny husk wins an award for being a high school vice principal and at&love isn't acknowledged in the bit. the "is he?" sketch has been revised to pack in as many euphemisms for gay as possible, putting the bit on top of another bit. and of course i have my chicken lady thoughts but i don't want to bias anyone else bc i genuinely want to know what your takes are before i share mine.

and again these aren't all bad choices - i think the danny husk vice principal monologue works really well and may not work as well as a different character despite contradicting the Husk Lore™️. but they're all very distinctive choices

idk there's two reasons i personally give for why tour of duty is so strange (to me at least, maybe other people don't notice). the first is that it comes less than 3 years after their other tour-film, the 1999/2000 tour "same guys new dresses" (also available on youtube!) i fucking love SGND and i'll be up front that it's my preferred kith tour video. but part of what makes SGND so special is that it's not just a recording of the live show, it's a full tour documentary following the guys traveling across the country performing together, occasionally showing full sketches but also delving into the stories behind why the sketches played out the way they did. and, sure, sometimes that means cutting out a sketch that i wish i could've seen in full (rip power of the suburbs) but my life is so much better for having seen the "laser eye surgery gossip" or knowing how much drama that goddamn robot-dog-prop caused.

so to then see tour of duty as a straight-up recording of the live show leaves that element of mystery, that we don't get to know why choices were made because we only see the end result. there was a conscious decision not to shoot tour of duty like SGND - the tour doc didn't do well financially, and they also had more of a reason to document that tour since it was their first time working together since the disastrous fallout of "brain candy," and first big national tour since the show ended. the circumstances were just very different

and that's true both personally and politically bc the second suspected reason for tour of duty's weird tone is you can obviously tell 9/11 just happened. two sketches directly reference it - bruce and mark's businessman characters sell scam patriotic products that are all just a rubber band, and buddy cole visits the middle east and ends up having sex with saddam hussein (tho fun fact this concept was written BEFORE 9/11). but the event casts an obvious shadow, especially since both the buddy cole bit and the danny husk monologue were recycled pieces from scott's cancelled one-man-show which was set to debut in new york city on september 19th 2001.

it's also interesting comparing this to SGND. the late 90s are often remembered through rose-tinted glasses due to a generally good economy in the united states and a lot of the social tensions with disenfranchised groups still bubbling under the surface rather than being talked about openly. SGND doesn't reference contemporary events much, but the closure of AT&Love from the KITH finale is undone since the economy has re-entered "rock-on fashion," and buddy cole comments on the Y2K computer bug being underwhelming. (i also went on a super long tangent on how the original show reflected the socioeconomic climate of the 90s but that's a whole other topic i need to go to bed)

i don't know how the KITH feel about "tour of duty." i can't know how much this strangeness was felt for them backstage, and i think in some regards it can only be picked up on as an outsider, albeit an outsider who has watched so much KITH content to know how their work evolved even when not on television. all in all, i'm glad "tour of duty" exists and even the swings that didn't really land for me are still admirable as creative choices.

it's also cool to analyze as someone who has now been to a KITH live show over 2 decades later and got to see those behind-the-scenes conversations play out. the bellini benefit also featured a lot of strangeness, caused by a limited rehearsal schedule and one of the cast members being unable to attend due to illness, but they absolutely exceeded these limitations to put on a very fun show. we did film the performance and rehearsals and that show is going to be released eventually (i'm not in charge of it but the person who is also works on the buddy cole doc so i'm involved). i don't know if it's going to be presented more like SGND or tour of duty or something completely different, but it'll be cool to be part of KITH live show canon

[halfetirosie]

☁︎✴☁︎ KUYA IS THE WORST THERAPIST OF ALL TIME!!!!! ☁︎✴☁︎

(Elysium 10-11 React-os!)

Fair warning, I'mma be a bit of a hater in this one...🤦‍♀️

1) KUYA, WHAT THE HELL?!?!?!?!?!

First of all: kidnapping is fucking ILLEGAL!

Second: this is just too far. It's already bad enough that Olivine will have to answer embarrassing questions in front of an audience, but having to do so in front of the kids--????

I was rooting for you, Kuya! But then you go and be a dick again!!!!

😡

2) Damn, what an awful way to die....

I HATE bugs, they're so gross---

Plus, this situation is already ASTRONOMICALLY STRESSFUL; having a big, ugly, threatening bug crawling all over you will make it even worse!!!

3) My thoughts exactly, Eiden!!!!

Why is Eiden the only sane person here???

It seems like Kuya have set things up to be as agonizing as possible, and that just feels EVIL to me.

This is why I really hate that damn fox sometimes. He keeps causing genuine pain to people, hitting them right where it hurts, and it's [at least partially] only for his own entertainment.

4) (｡Ó ᗣ Ò｡)

Olivineeee, sweeetieeeee!!!! Come here and give me a hug!!!!

This is so depressingly relatable.... Amiright, fellow degenerates? 😅 Gotta laugh about it or else you'll cry...

Olivine is really GOING THRU IT. I can't imagine having to admit something like this to my family/friends!

I am so fucking stressed!!!!

5) FUCK!!!!! MAKE IT STOP!!!!

LISTEN. I GET THAT OLIVINE NEEDS TO FACE HIS FEELINGS PROPERLY INSTEAD OF AVOIDING THEM. Aside from the damn fox's entertainment, that is what "the point" of this trial is.

Accepting your feelings is necessary for healing.

But you know what doesn't have a point? FORCING OLIVINE TO ANSWER THIS QUESTION IN FRONT OF THE MOST FRAGILE AND INNOCENT PEOPLE IN HIS LIFE, WHOM HE REALLY CARES ABOUT!!!!!

I feel like I'm just repeating myself at this point, but seriously, this is so fucked up! If I were Eiden, I probably would've interrupted and tried to end this shitty trial, too...

6) Kuya, you are seriously such a dick....

I think Kuya is partially up to his Tsundere Bullshit™ again; I think he's pretending to be casually "observing" things when really, he's searching for some sort of answer. (After all, this is the same dude that has been alive for longer than we can imagine, and has struggled with suicidal thoughts in the past)

The reason he calls the trial participants "boring" is likely because they didn't give the answers Kuya wanted---I suspect that this trial has served as Kuya's fucked up way of searching for meaning in life.

But what really pisses me off is the demeaning way he talks about humans; even now, during a trial whose questions focus on one's true desires and personal values.

HE'S the one always prattling on about how humans shouldn't judge himself, a yokai, by human standards. And yet, he doesn't have the decency to do the same???

Humans live a much shorter time than him, after all. Of COURSE they'll put value in different things than him; especially if they're someone who frequently spends time in a red light district.

That might be why he assumes Olivine's morality is a "mask," but at the same time, he actually knows Olivine personally (at least, to some extent), unlike the strangers he's tested in this "trial."

I don't think I can give Kuya the benefit of the doubt anymore. This lack of empathy isn't "out of his control," IT'S A FUCKING CHOICE. AND THAT IS WHY I'M ANGRY!!!! 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

Kuya shouldn't be allowed to conduct this "trial." This "trial" shouldn't even exist. What HE needs---what Olivine needs---what EVERYONE needs---IS SOME ACTUAL PROPER THERAPY!!!!

7) CONFIRMED: Eiden is me in this event

Is this hinting that this whole trial is an illusion, maybe?? As in, there isn't actually an audience here??

Honestly tho, at this point, that doesn't even matter to me. Kuya is still being a dick and putting Olivine through HELL, and it is so unnecessary!!! 😡😡😡

8) It just keeps getting worse and worse...

Watching this trial is giving me such intense second-hand fear/sadness, bro---I'm crying very real tears. It's literally hurting me.

This really didn't need to be done in front of an audience, dude... Shit like this is SUPER private. It shouldn't be made into a spectacle like this...

BITCH, KUYA MADE OLIVINE CRY!!!!!!!

(｡Ó ᗣ Ò｡)

WHY!!!!

THE FUCK!!!!!

DID HE HAVE TO DO THIS!!!!!

LIKE THIS?!?!?!?!

9) HELL YEAH, OLIVINE!!!! PREACH!!!

I can't believe we went through all of this just so Olivine could give the most obvious answer of all time---

⊹ ࣪ ˖♡ LOVE ♡⊹ ࣪ ˖

That's also the answer that our foxy bitch friend was really searching for...

10) OH FUCK, THANK GOD!!!!

I AM SO FUCKING RELIEVED, THE KIDS WERE JUST ILLUSIONS!!!!

I don't forgive Kuya for pulling that stunt, tho. I stand by my opinion that it was COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY.

11) TRUTH:

It's honestly kind of wild to see Olivine explaining the value of love to a mean old foxy grandpa, but hey, here we are!

It's Olivine's turn to be the therapist! The right way!

:D

12) You're a much more patient person than me, Olivine...

(ᵕ—ᴗ—)

I held on for as long as I could, but I can no longer be generous when his antics cross a certain line... I'm giving this fox the silent treatment for the next three weeks!!

13) *heavy sigh*

Yeah, that's true...

Olivine and Kuya actually have a fair bit in common, when you think about it; specifically, their history with Depressive Episodes and--as Olivine puts it here-- their "struggle to live."

I think the main difference is, because of Kuya's long-ass life, he's much more set in his ways; thus, it's harder for him to let go of his destructive tendencies.

He may not be as violent as he used to be, but he still has a terrible habit of emotionally harming others...

Do I think this excuses his behavior? No.

Do I think he deserves another chance; to be treated with compassion and helped? Yes.

But he ALSO deserves to see some actual consequences for his actions.

☁︎ End of report ☁︎

[svt-rae]

「 rae masterlist 」

GOING SEVENTEEN EP. 9 / 10 : don't lie lll (#1&2) [61621]

TW : nothing?

<in today's game, you are...>

Rae steps out of the hellvator next to Jun, intertwining her arm with his

she ends up next to Jeonghan, as always, on an armchair

<everyone checked their roles already> Seungkwan is the frist to speak after the silly fight between Hoshi and Mingyu

<he is the mafia> Rae don't even let Seungkwan finish his sentence, she accuses him

*she is perceptive* everyone laughs

<If you try to find me the way I found mafia Dino in 'don't lie ll', you'll seriously regret it>

<yah, are you threatening us?!" Rae stands up, pointing the boy

after the other agree that Seunkwan is the mafia, the voice interrupts you all

<the game will begin, the rewards starts from 500,000 KRW>

<so, Wonu, Rae and Jeonghan are the mafia>

<ey~ watch you'r mouth> she says

She give Dino a warning look from across the room *they love each other*

<new people would be the mafia this time> Rae look at Jeonghan concerned after what he says

<he is trying to fool us, he is the mafia for sure> she suddenly speaks, indicating him

<I swear I'm not> Jeonghan defends himself from the accusations

<why today you are accusing everyone out of the sudden?! I'm starting to think you are the mafia> when Hoshi speaks, Rae is almost scare and you can tell by the scared look on her eyes

*she doesn't wanna end up like Mingyu*

<look, I said it!> Hoshi screams out ot the excitement, making the room go a completly chaos

<no! I just don't wanna end up like Mingyu> she stands up widening her eyes

<liar!> Hoshi does NOT trust her

Rae is too stunned to speak, she just walk trowards him like she wanna punch him

<ya ya> Seuncheol laughs, standing between them

she silently returns to her sit, as the conversation it goes on

<the frist mini game will begin> the deep voice speaks

<you start> Dino looks on the opposite side, Rae

<no, you can go frist> she says, after jeonghan intervened

Dino goes first *evil twins always win*

the games ends having 5 min and 30 sec to find the treasure, Rae is too lazy to find it anyway

<I just let my cameraman relax> she talks to the camera pointing right on her face

when the others come back she is already sitting on the same spot

<why she is here?, she is not putting effort because she is the mafia> Mingyu immediately speaks as soon she see her

<i'm just lazy, i'm a citizen!>

they start to argue again about who is the mafia

She keep it quite the most of the time, until...

<[...] I suspect of Rae>

She snaps her head to S.coups

<she is too quite and she didn't even bothered to look for the money>

<just because i'm lazy to search for it, it doesn't mean I am the mafia!>

<he is right tho...> Hoshi put his hand on his chin like he is thinking

<yah, don't even start. You're accusing everyone, why we don't just get rid of him!?>

at the end, he wasn't the mafia but atleast Rae get rid of him. Mingyu archived his dream too!

<we'll start the second mini game>

<I like going outside> it was Rae question for the game

everyone brusted into laugh, already knowing the answer

<I don't> Rae admitted, still giggling

<this question, really...> <they are so easy!>

*ofcurse it was the truth*

Rae decided to go search the prize now, to not let the suspect go on her once again

<cameraman, I wanted to let you rest but it seems like they don't want to. They are mean, right?> Rae talks to the cameraman

<what you're talking about~> Dk overheard her and hit her shoulder

she laughs at her being discovered

she cover her nose as Dk got closer to her *exhaling is prohibited*

<hey, I brushed my theet-!" Rae runs away from him

<noona! Jeonghan said he is the pharmacist~> she can hear Dino calling her

<oh- i'm the pharmacist too> she plays along

<really, I can't belive them...> he walks away with Woozi, it can be seen on the background Rae and Jeonghan laughing togheter

<Vernon, you are tired too?> you smile when you see him sitting on the couch talking with Dino, before being interrupted by S.coups

<why you three are not searching?>

<we were saying that you are the mafia> Rae tease him

<i'm not, i'll say it, i'm the broker> <oh~>

<a participant has found the treasure>

<we need to kill who found the money, not fair he has it and we not, right?> she says

<YOU found the money, didn't you?> Dino accuse her once again

<I seem that smart to you?> Rae replies

*no she isn't*

<i'll tell you straight, i'm the pharmacist> Jeonghan confess

<isn't Rae noona a pharmacist too?> and those were the times she regret to play along with Jeonghan.

Rae tires to hold her laugh in as she see how far Jeonghan took this

absolutely brust into laughs when he, or they, get caught

<let's speed out, chose one> <Rae>

gives a creepy smile to Dino

<the third mini game will begin>

<why they always earn so much time~> Rae casually talks to the cameraman that was following her around, searching for who found the money now

she looks at Jeonghan and S.coups that pass beside her, too focused on their conversation to notice her

*she has an idea* Rae looks at the camera silently with a smirk

without getting noticed, she stalks all the conversation

<so Jeonghan is the real broker, not S.coups, and he knows who found the prize, Interesting>

she looks at S.coups walking away <I need to talk to him because I want the money too... but i'm too lazy 🙂>

<time is out? finally cameraman, let's find out who have the money>

<he is wearing the truth glasses, it's over for yall> she points at Vernon when they are sitting togheter again

<it's over for you> Jeonghan says at the girl

<I think Mungyu and you are the mafia> Joshua start to say <at this point Rae looks way too unbothered to be one of the mafia>

<that's right, she would be wishing with the others all the time. I don't think she is> Minghao agree

Rae just laughs, knowing that she is very obvious when she is the mafia

<what if there is no mafia> <WOAH~, sorry> she apologize when she got that she was too loud

<SHE IS THE MAFIA YALL I'M SAYING IT>

<I'M REALLY NOT>

after another big BIG blander (I can't do this anymore i'm sorry 😭) they decide to get rid of her

*no money for her*

<innocent citizen Rae was eliminated>

<THE MAFIA WAS THE STAFF ALL THE TIME?!>

✸ ‧ ‧ ‧ RAE lookbook ❜

🇮 🇲 🇵 🇴 🇷 🇹 🇦 🇳 🇹  ꜝ

this was so long, I'm scared that it might be boring. 😭 Need new ideas, smt interesting hlp me

[antebunny]

as a huge fan of the original ACD canon, I desperately want to hear your elaboration about why you don't like BBC's Sherlock :D

hi OP I hope you're ready for a monster essay in response because that's what I ended up with!

For ease of reading I've divided up my answer into four sections: 1) explaining Arthur Conan Doyle's Sherlock with historical context, 2) analyzing BBC Sherlock/Moffat's Sherlock using a cross-section of Watsonian and Doylist techniques and sheer spite, 3) my thoughts on Johnlock, 4) comparing & contrasting Doyle's Sherlock with Moffat's Sherlock. Disclaimer: I'm not a historian, although I do I have some understanding of the history of detective fiction. Mostly I'm just an avid reader/fan.

Part I: Original Sherlock

To start with! I will talk about the characterization of Arthur Conan Doyle's Sherlock Holmes. Here's something which people who have never read the stories don't seem to know: Sherlock is kind.

He's not particularly nice, I'll give you that. He tends to think he's the smartest person in the room, and you know what? He almost always is. He has plenty of dry and sarcastic comments for the London police, for clients who don't bring any evidence, etc. But he goes out of his way to be kind. My favorite example of this is the Boscombe Valley Mystery.

The Boscombe Valley Mystery is far from my favorite Sherlock story in terms of mystery-solving, but one of the best in terms of characterizing Sherlock. To summarize: two wealthy, widower landowners, John and Charles, are next-door neighbors with one kid each–John, a daughter named Alice and Charles, a son named James.

Sherlock gets called in when Charles is found murdered, and everyone suspects James of doing it. Of course, it's not that easy. It turns out that twenty years ago, John was a highway robber in Australia, and he robbed Charles but left him alive. John then left the life of crime, started a family and settled in England a wealthy man. Then Charles moved in next door, recognized John, and proceeded to blackmail him for money, land, etc. This escalated until eventually Charles demanded Alice's hand in marriage for his son James. John refuses, and eventually kills Charles to protect Alice and to free himself from Charles' blackmailing/tyranny.

(The problem is that James is actually a decent person, and he and Alice are secretly in love, but there's also a bar maid involved and it's complicated and not relevant. Anyways).

Of course, Sherlock being Sherlock, he figures out that John is the murderer. But here's the thing: he defends John. He doesn't turn John (or his signed confession) over to the authorities. In fact, Sherlock goes to court to protect James by arguing that there's not enough evidence to find him guilty. Sherlock catches a murderer, goes "you know what? He was kind of right tho" and looks away.

Do you understand how radical this is for Victorian England? This is the 1890s. People still believe in God over gravity. The idea that a criminal isn't a criminal for life? That a highway robber can turn over a new leaf? That a murderer can be in the right? [Now would be a good time for a source] Like this is so new, I can't think of a way to translate it to the 21st century.

And it's key to who Sherlock is. He puts his reputation on the line for this case. He says that he didn't manage to solve this case, even though he did. His professional pride and reputation is worth less to him than protecting John, a MURDERER, and James, his son who admittedly is a nice guy whose worst crime is making dumb decisions in college (see: the bar maid).

Because here's the thing about Sherlock's "professional pride:" it's not "I'm the smartest person" or "I'm always right." Sherlock genuinely believes in his deduction method, not as a superpower which he alone possesses, but as a tool which anyone can use if they apply themselves. Which brings me to my second example: Irene Adler.

If you (general audience) only know Irene Adler from BBC Sherlock, I'm gonna ask you to forget all of that right now. Arthur Conan Doyle's Irene Adler is an American opera singer who used to be in a relationship with the future King of Bohemia. The king asks for Sherlock's help retrieving an incriminating photograph that Irene Adler has threatened to send to the king's future wife (a Scandinavian princess) and her family. (Irene Adler is currently in England, getting married to some guy named Norton).

Sherlock promptly gets outsmarted by Irene Adler. She leaves for America with Norton and the photograph, though she promises not to use it against the King of Bohemia, and keeps her promise. Because here's the thing about Irene Adler: she's not a criminal. She's not a bad guy in any way. She doesn't blackmail the king. She had a fling with the King of Bohemia, eventually moved on with her life and married Norton. When Sherlock came sniffing around for her private property, which she was under no obligation to return/give up, she got the hell out of England.

Despite this, Irene Adler is often framed not only as a criminal but also as Sherlock's love interest in adaptations. (And I'm not even talking about BBC Sherlock, trust me, we'll get to that). I think this is due to a fundamental failure or refusal to understand the nature of Sherlock's interest in Irene Adler. He explicitly states that he is not romantically attracted to her. (And neither is she to him). He is impressed by her intellect. It is rare enough for Sherlock to be outsmarted; I think Irene Adler may be the only example in the original stories where the person/group who outsmarted Sherlock was not a career criminal or other type of evil-doer (such as the KKK, in The Five Orange Pips, yes that KKK).

For all intents and purposes, Irene Adler is an ordinary woman, trying to do an ordinary thing (get married to Some Guy), who just so happens to get one over Sherlock in a case where he is arguably in the wrong. That is what makes her so special. Sherlock believes that his deduction methods can be implemented by anybody, but here's somebody, actually implementing them! And she was trained as an opera singer, not as a detective or some such field! And she's not using it to systematically murder or blackmail or anything else, she just wants to live her best life away from this Bohemian nonsense!

Sherlock is excited when someone outsmarts him. And it is so rare for there to be no horrific crime taking away from that excitement.

In summary: Sherlock Holmes is a perfectly well-mannered English gentleman (the social class, not polite descriptor) with shockingly progressive morals for the 1890s, a need for brain puzzles and adventures, and a non-debilitating addiction to crack cocaine.

Some other notes about original Sherlock before I move on to the next section:

Sherlock indirectly caused someone's death in The Adventure of the Speckled Band, and does not feel at all broken up about it. Honestly? I respect that.

Doyle was not perfect. Irene Adler was smart "for her sex." All of the stories mentioned above contain examples of foreigners importing struggles to England. Violent Americans from Five Orange Pips, armed robberies from Australia in Boscombe Valley, loose(?) Bohemians(???) in A Scandal in Bohemia, a mercenary and violent "doctor" from Calcutta (though English by birth) in Speckled Band, etc. I could go on. And I am sure that he made some claims later proved to be scientifically inaccurate.

Aside from Doyle's biases, the Sherlock Holmes stories are also prone to the same real-world changes as any other famous series. Doyle famously killed off Sherlock only to bring him back due to the public outrage. The many, many short stories vary quite a bit in quality, and a little in consistency. Sometimes you just have to throw your hands up and go with the Doylist (heh) reading. We'll get back to this.

Sherlock would not be caught dead in Buckingham Palace wearing only a bedsheet. He often disguises himself in the short stories, as a grandfatherly figure, faking a Cockney accent, as all a manner of (typically older, and therefore less threatening) men. Part of his strength as a detective is his awareness of social circles and the workings of society. He uses it to his advantage, he doesn't provoke public scandal.

He's a private person. He didn't ask to be famous, or to be memorialized as a genius, and again, he doesn't go around looking for adoration or outrage.

Sherlock scorns romance, yes, but not in an internalized aphobia, "I'm suppressing my emotions/desire for the sake of The Case" kind of way, but in an "I'm the only reasonable person here, the rest of you are just weird" kind of way. We'll get back to that one.

Sherlock did have Moods. He also did drugs. But drugs didn't have the social context of drugs now.

Sherlock was superhumanly strong, for no particular reason? There's one story where someone threatens him (in his own flat, no less!) and he remains very polite and unflustered by it. Once the man leaves, he picks up the metal poker that the man bent and straightens it.

Honestly the disguises and the hand-to-hand combat made original Sherlock so OP. I'm not projecting modern values onto old characters, you are. Send Tweet.

Doyle was a spiritualist?!?!?! Like a committed believer in ghosts. Like so committed it ruined his friendship with Houdini. Yes, Harry Houdini. This is not relevant, I'm just impressed that an author so spiritual could write a character so famously and firmly rational.

Okay that's the important bits for original Sherlock. I could easily double the length of that section, but I hope it's clear enough now why I consider original Sherlock to be Very Cool and Interesting.

Part II: BBC Sherlock

Boy oh boy oh boy oh boy. Where to start with this one. Well, here's hbomberguy's 2-hour video essay on why BBC Sherlock is trash, to start. It's been a long time since I watched it but I recall it focusing more on its creator, Steven Moffat (and what that man did to Doctor Who as well, God sometimes I just lay awake thinking about every precious thing Moffat was allowed to put his slimy hands on). So I will attempt to focus on a few key things I don't remember hearing in that video essay.

First: The Trope of the Autistic Genius. I'm sure you (general audience) have seen this in some form of media: a socially awkward or unaware character, perhaps outright on the autism spectrum, perhaps just Weird™ who is a genius in a particular field. It's related to the Idiot Savant trope, thanks TV tropes, and portrayals range from a cute fictional romance with an autistic lawyer in Extraordinary Attorney Woo to the somewhat real-to-life story of John Nash, a real mathematician who made incredible contributions to the field of economics and also had incredibly difficult personal relationships due to his schizophrenia.

For some reason, Moffat decided to use this trope for Sherlock Holmes. I say "some reason" but it's pretty clear why: Sherlock is a genius. And there's a long tradition of "genius as a curse" characters where their intelligence comes at a cost: their ease of relationships with other people. Sometimes this is an explicit curse where the character traded power/intelligence/money etc. for the ability to feel (romantic) love (see: Howl's Moving Castle the movie). For the autistic genius, usually the price of their ability to grasp concepts (usually math or some type of science) beyond the understanding of Mere Mortals is their ability to understand people and social cues.

The thing is, the way Moffat does this with Sherlock makes no damn sense. He's a detective. His whole ass job is to understand social cues, human behavior, motivations and generally what makes people tick. There's probably a good way to make Sherlock autistic. However, the way Moffat does it creates this inherent contradiction, where Sherlock swings wildly from totally missing social cues to perfectly understanding people's desire and motivations. Make it make sense. Make up your mind. Is your Sherlock a tortured genius who cannot understand or relate to normal Molly Hooper, or is he a brilliant detective who Gets how people work? You (Moffat) can't have it both ways. It doesn't make any sense.

Second: the Reading People as Superpower thing. Moffat fully subscribes to the idea that you (general) can just look at somebody and deduce their whole backstory. This one pisses me off personally because it leaks to real life all the damn time. The phone charger is probably the most infamous example of why this doesn't work. (Fun fact, if the area around your phone charger is scratched from you repeatedly failing to plug it in, that doesn't mean you are an alcoholic!)

But it occurs both in BBC Sherlock and IRL. Usually IRL people are nice enough to only say out loud something that they think is positive. But here's the thing: they're almost never right. I've had nice little old ladies tell me "I can see that you are XYZ type of person" in the most well-meaning of ways and be completely off the mark. Not a single person who has guessed my race (out loud) has gotten it right. But I'm not just saying "don't make assumptions for the big things like race/sexuality/religion etc." I'm saying, we all make those assumptions when we first meet someone, whether we like it or not. But we have a choice whether to act on those assumptions. Reading people is not a fun thing smart people do in media, it's a common thing all of us do despite not having a higher chance of being correct than Moffat was with the phone charger thing.

The "you can read into anything because there's secret meanings behind everything" that BBC Sherlock encouraged led to one of the funniest and most pathetic phenomena in fandom: The Secret Good Sherlock finale. There's a good 1.5 hour video essay about it and how a portion of BBC Sherlock fans deluded themselves into thinking that the horrible, horrible ending of BBC Sherlock couldn't be real, and that there was a real finale coming if you just followed the clues where Johnlock was canon (more on that later). Because they just couldn't accept that this show which portrayed itself as so clever and Moffat as a 4D chess-master always fifteen steps ahead, was just Not Good.

(Side note: I missed all of the BBC Sherlock fandom experience despite watching the show, because I watched the show with my family. We all knew Doyle, you see; my father read those stories to my siblings and I as bedtime stories when I was little. I still remember his reading cadence and the character voices that he did. So when we heard about BBC Sherlock, we thought "hey, we know that guy!" and settled in to watch it as a family. I distinctly remember thinking that it was…fine? Like, just okay. But nothing about it was better than the original, and I would how much worse it was years later).

Third: Sherlock is just weirdly mean? All the time? In BBC Sherlock. I can only assume this is some sort of power trip fantasy, where the author self-insert (we'll come back to that) Sherlock is the most perfect boy who is always right and correct and so much smarter than everyone else that he just doesn't have to put up with their stupidity.

Like many of the gripes I have with BBC Sherlock, what I hate the most is how Moffat's portrayal seems to have influenced the general public's perception of who Sherlock is. Would this type of Victorian Sherlock exist without the type of arrogant monologuing that Moffat favored? I mean, maybe. I can't prove it. I just feel like they're related. (To be clear, I like Sherlock in that scene. I just think it's inconsistent with original Sherlock's interactions with the police, but to be fair, original Sherlock didn't have a little sister in jail for murder).

Fourth, IRENE ADLER MY BELOVED I WILL AVENGE YOU ONE DAY I SWEAR.

So Steven Moffat cannot for the life of him write a female character I'd feel bad for him if it wasn't so painful to watch in Doctor Who, Sherlock, and basically everything else he's ever done. Moffat, like many adaptors of Sherlock, was dead-set on making Irene Adler a femme fatale. She's not only a criminal, she's also sexy and very weirdly interested in Sherlock (again, the author self-insert strikes again. All the women must be interested in me I mean my most perfect boy!)

I am far from the only person who noticed this. Here's a Reddit post which calls Irene Adler out for basically sexually harassing BBC Sherlock throughout that episode. I don't disagree with the substance but I disagree with the reading. That post takes a Watsonian approach: Irene Adler repeatedly expresses sexual interest in Sherlock, who does not reciprocate. Despite this, the characters around him assume he reciprocates and at the end of the episode his brother Mycroft blames his nonexistent/unconfirmed interest in Irene Adler as the reason why she got one over him. When he does his dramatic "I am Sherlocked" reveal, he is saying 1) that he's really not interested, 2) that she didn't get one over him, and 3) that her emotional/sexual investment(?) in him is why she lost.

Here's the Doylist reading: Moffat's fantasy is the sexiest/coolest woman (Irene Adler) chasing after his author self-insert (Sherlock) who remains coolly aloof despite her advances, because he's cool. Everyone else's assertions that he's secretly interested stems from society's need to smash two dolls together and say "now kith" regardless of what the dolls in question are saying. At the end of the episode Sherlock makes the points that I made above, yes, but Moffat's also reaffirming that no one is allowed to outsmart his most special, most perfect boy (/self-insert), not even the character that CANONICALLY OUTSMARTED HIM. (Although to reiterate: original Irene Adler was not a criminal, did not blackmail anyone, and was not interested in Sherlock. Also she was American lmao).

There's one key scene (which I loathe with all my heart) that demonstrates how Moffat sees Irene Adler, and that's her introduction scene. Why? Because she walks in naked. Why? Because that way Sherlock cAn'T rEaD hEr. (Which brings us back to point #2, Reading People as Superpower).

This is mind-bogglingly, mind-bafflingly stupid. If Irene Adler really wanted Sherlock to """"not be able to read her"""" she should've just stolen the clothes of the first woman she saw that was her size. Or men's clothes, not her size, and not hers. That way any traces of character left on the clothes (i.e. coffee stains, hems worn down from constant worrying, cat fur, etc.) would've belonged to someone else, thus throwing Sherlock off even more.

And it's not like the body lacks marks unique to the person. Jesus Christ. Surgeries leave scars, as do accidents and injuries. Birthmarks, bite marks, stretch marks, scar marks, people drawing reminders or hearts on themselves with sharpies, tattoos, the list goes on and on and on and on and on. Bodies are not blank canvases.

There is no good Watsonian reading for why Irene Adler walks in naked. There is only a Doylist reading: Moffat thought it'd be hot for his femme fatale to meet his self-insert butt-ass naked. That is why I disagree with the Reddit post I linked which I assume you (general audience) read. Irene Adler's actions don't make sense when framed as "she's smart but obsessed with Sherlock despite never having met him before." I mean, it's possible? But it makes her far less intelligent from the very start than the show tells you she is. Her actions only make sense when framed as "Moffat thought it would be hot." (Dear Moffat: it's not).

Fifth, and finally: The Big Bad. This is not Moffat-specific: the need to have one main villain, to have everything in a series building to the big showdown with the Big Bad exists all over the place. Episodes are getting longer and longer while seasons get shorter and shorter. Sherlock, originally a series of short stories (with some long-form stories, my favorites <3 thrown in the mix), is perfect for the 30-45 minute 12-16 episode seasons. Instead it got…BBC Sherlock. With Moriarty as The Big Bad. Who Irene Adler is working for? For some reason? And has come back to life maybe? It's dumb. Bring back my case-of-the-week type stories :(

There are plenty more gripes I could list about BBC Sherlock, but those are the main ones. This is already getting much longer than I intended, so onto part three: my thoughts on Johnlock.

Part III: Do I ship Johnlock?

No.

Part IV: Just kidding!

Well, I don't not ship them. A friend asked me recently if I shipped them, and I thought about it for a minute and eventually said: "Honestly? I am so thoroughly neutral about them."

You could convince me of Johnlock. However, I remain unconvinced by the vast majority, if not all, of BBC Johnlock. It essentially feels like a derivative form of a derivative and vastly inferior form of the real Sherlock Holmes and John Watson. Basically: the Johnlock that you (general BBC Johnlock shipper) are a fan of are just two people who happen to share names with the characters I know as the great detective Sherlock Holmes and the good doctor John Watson. But they're not actually Holmes and Watson, thus what you're shipping isn't even "real" Johnlock.

There are two parts of Johnlock's dynamic that I think are missing from the broader conversation (which is not to say that they're not talked about, just that they should be talked about more).

First, we're back to Watsonian vs Doylist readings, this time with the origin of the term in mind! (My literary analyst heart cackles in delight). You see, the Doylist reason for Watson's existence is to chronicle Sherlock's adventures. Genius characters are near-impossible to write from their perspective. The mystery and ingenuity vastly improves when explained by Sherlock to Watson after the fact. We, the audience, need John Watson to exist for the stories to be enjoyable. He is a plot device.

Now, I'm not saying that because John Watson exists for plot purposes, we can't consider the emotional connection between him and his flatmate. The Watsonian reading, according to Johnlock shippers, is that Sherlock and John live together because they are gayandinlove.

Which brings me to part two of their dynamic: the QPR-ness of it all. I think there's a lack of conversation about anything between "straight" and "gayandinlove" when there's so much gray area to discuss. Johnlock, in both the original and in my preferred version, strike me as a very comfortable queer-platonic relationship. It feels wrong for Sherlock to have a wife, husband, boyfriend, lover, etc. because it is so contradictory to who Sherlock is. I just can't picture him engaging in any modern or Victorian-era dating or courtship ritual. And not just because he explicitly derides and expresses his lack of interest in romance in the originals. After all, it's impossible to separate Sherlock's bachelorhood from the part where it was obviously impossible for him to marry a man in the 1890s; the institution of marriage simply didn't mean then what it does now. He certainly never and would never speak about sex, or his sexual preferences. I am sure they were assumed to be Good And Heterosexual. Which isn't to say that Victorian times were less queer than modern times. Doyle's contemporary, the Irish poet Oscar Wilde (1854-1900) was very famously (/infamously) gay. The author Rudyard Kipling (1865-1936) is also rumored to have cheated on his wife with her brother/his publisher.

No, I've always seen Sherlock as aroace just because…he comes across as very aroace? I don't know how to explain it other than "read it and tell me I'm wrong." And Johnlock always came across as very comfortable to me. Like there was a total lack of yearning. Don't get me wrong, I totally understand projecting into characters, so if you (general Johnlock shipper) add yearning to your Johnlock I'm not criticizing you. (And no, I'm not getting into Mary Morstan and her differing characterizations because then we'd really be here all day).

I also don't subscribe to the idea that Sherlock is aromantic because of his genius, his detective career, or his suppression of natural instincts in favor of the aforementioned reasons. It's aphobic and it's not how Sherlock works. The man is not judging himself for his lack of interest, he's judging you (aphobe) for thinking there's some deeper cause or something wrong with him for not being interested in romance.

And I can't fathom him engaging in sex except as an intellectual exercise. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I always thought BBC Sherlock was so weird about the concept of being gay. I mean, there were gay jokes galore but They Were Not Gay and Moriarty was gay-coded but John was definitely not into Sherlock and Sherlock was not gay but he wasn't into Irene Adler either, but that didn't make him asexual either, just…a genius?? Apparently??? Like he's straight but he's also too smart to be fooled by Irene Adler's wily wily feminine wiles. Like Straight 2.0 where they make you pay more for the same product with ads this time.

Which finally brings me to the last section: comparing original Sherlock and BBC Sherlock!

Part IV: We all know where this is going

Honestly most of this section has written itself already.

Original Sherlock Holmes was remarkably progressive for its times; BBC Sherlock was somehow less progressive despite being made centuries later. Its portrayal of women was somehow worse than the thing written in the 1890s. I'm a big believer in judging things with historical and social context in mind, which makes original Sherlock all the more astounding, and BBC Sherlock all the more regressive.

Original Sherlock Holmes was an excitable bloodhound who believed in his rational method and was genuinely delighted when he met his match. He was irritable and moody and indirectly killed a man with no remorse. BBC Sherlock is an arrogant, self-obsessed jerk who constantly belittled and mocked the intelligence and achievements of others. He, despite not understanding people, popularized the "you wear that sweater to remind you of your dead mother. You feel lost without her and are seeking a substitute in Macys Mother's Day line products" type of armchair psychoanalysis.

Original Sherlock loves a good case but sees his clients as human, at the end of the day. BBC Sherlock cannot stand to be wrong.

Original Sherlock and John are companions, comfortably; not normal/regular friends, though I would never say "more" than friends. Maybe, in a modern era, they'd be romantic partners of some sort, maybe not; I don't really care. BBC Sherlock and John are…friends but you gotta believe Moffat when he tells you that they are Definitely Not Gay. Like Not At All. Not Even A Little.

In conclusion: I loathe BBC Sherlock with all my heart. It is an insult to the legacy of Sherlock Holmes. A regression in the face of how radical Arthur Conan Doyle was. i genuinely feel sorry for all the people who have watched that show but never read the originals because they have no idea who Sherlock is, and original Sherlock is so damn cool.

[fizzy-blood]

do you have any Nina hcs? I love her :3

AHHH NINA!! so real for liking her (I'm a sucker for the yandere trope and scene queens)

✮ Nina the Killer🔪💜headcanons ✮

[Sfw] these are general and platonic so if u want romantic or sexual (don't know if I have any for her tho) headcanons then feel free to ask!!

General!!

So, it's widely agreed throughout the fandom that she's a scene queen and honestly? You go girly!!

Definitely stands out a bit because of it but I doubt she cares

Apparently she was originally gonna be obsessed with EJ instead of Jeff (real tbh) but in my au she only considered that idea for a short amount of time, didn't really appeal to her enough to cause in obsession

Speaking of her obsession! Her infatuation w Jeff has died down a bit! Don't get me wrong, she still likes him and all but she's much more calm about it (she suspects he might be gay sooo)

On an unrelated note- she's probably one of the only creeps who actually takes any care of herself?

Like, a good chunk of the people in the mansion shower once a month (and sometimes that just means bathing in the nearby lake).

But no. She'll randomly break into people's houses or befriend random people she was going to kill so she can use their shower or bath!

Also, if she's out here befriending her victims then she's probably got much better social skills then most ppl in the mansion.

As a result of this, she's normally the first person people talk to when they join the group.

✧∘˙Room headcanons time!!˙∘✧ (I love wondering what she'd use to decorate so I had to add this).

90% sure that she'll just randomly loot her victims of any change or cash they had on them and put on a mask (like the ones from covid) and just walk into random shops she likes-

Idk why, just seems like smt she'd do?

Anywayssss

She's probably got a large collection of plushies and toys (she's got a hoard of Domo plushies and you can't tell me otherwise, also hello kitty)

Probably owns one or two of those super soft Invader Zim blankets you can get at Spencers

STRING LIGHTS STRING LIGHTS STRING LIGHTS STRING LI-

Back to general headcanons!!

She probably has a couple different weapons (including her og knife) that she'll rotate between. Also one time just brought back a whole ass chainsaw?

Like, came back with a chainsaw that was in a shed she was hiding in and put it in her room?

She's only used it once or twice but still has it just in case someone new enters the mansion and doesn't have a weapon (she just gives people random shit she has so I felt that would be fitting)

Platonic headcanons

As I said earlier, she's probably the first person you would have talked to once you got to the mansion so befriending her would be super easy compared to the others!

Would probably try to host a girls night with you and the others (if ur not a girl ur still getting invited. Dw, u probably wouldn't be the only guy)

Sleepovers too!

She's also probably the only person that you could go to for romantic advice (as mentioned in my EJ x Zombie!reader thing)

If you liked Jeff she might be a bit salty around you for a bit though- but if he doesn't like you back then you'd probably just talk about him w her

If he did like you back? Then you might wanna sleep w one eye open for the rest of your time at the mansion...

Anyways.. If it was someone else she'd probably try to talk w them more often to see if she could get you two together (also would stalk them for you if you wanted, would even give you tips for how to get away with that yourself)

The point is that shes the only one who won't judge you when you come for romantic advice.. Trust!

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ 𝐴𝑁𝐷 𝑊𝐸𝑅𝐸 𝐷𝑂𝑁𝐸!! (𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑛𝑜𝑤)!!˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

That was kind of a long one but I've got a lot of headcanons about her, I left out some of them cuz some of them are super common soooo yk-

Anyways, I hope you enjoyed it!! -Fizz