#stickin w it isn’t

[oneknightlight]

2 months of improvement dude. That’s fucking insane I’m so proud

[blackbutler-readerinsertsandjunk]

May I please request “You’re perfect just the way you are” for Peter please? Istg, our short king deserves so much love.

uuuugh you're so right!! give him kisses ;w;

105 Comfort Prompts

28. “You’re perfect just the way you are.”

Most of the time, you can’t blame PETER for being angry and bitter.

He’s a man who the rest of the world look at as if he’s a child. If someone doesn’t disbelieve him that he’s an adult, they’re making fun of him because he looks different than other men. It’s not even only him; the rest of his family have been outcast, mocked, jeered at, derided, just for existing in a way that isn’t the way many people exist.

It’s wrong and horrible, and you can’t fault him for being furious about the way he and his loved ones have been treated.

… But he never acts like this. He never just lies in bed, curled up, huffily scooting away from you every time you try to touch him. For all his insecurity, he’d rather let it burn brightly and deny to the world that anything is ‘wrong’ with him, instead of letting himself get lost in it and isolate himself in sadness.

You’re not sure exactly what happened. You could wager a guess, of course. The only words he’s spoken to you are to tell you that you should get out, you should leave him, you should go find a real man instead of half a man.

Like hell that’s happening. Whether he likes it or not, he’s a real man. So you’re not going anywhere, no matter how much he tries to push you away.

“I’m not leaving until you tell me what’s going on,” you sigh as you stretch out next to him. If he actually doesn’t want you here, he has no qualms at all about kicking you out of the bed or out of his tent. (He’s done it before when he needs time to himself, so there’s nothing stopping him from doing it again.) As long as he doesn’t do that, even if he’s upset, there must be some part of him which wants you here. “And I hate to be the one to tell you, since you don’t already know, but you’re stuck with me.”

He scoffs, although it sounds significantly less frustrated than usual. He just sounds… defeated. “Wot are y’ stickin’ round f’r, anyway, ‘uh? Wot y’ think’s gonna ‘appen? Y’re gonna get sick’a me. Ain’t gonna marry me ‘r nothin’. I wouldn’t marry me. Y’re gonna get tired’a ‘avin’ t’ bend down t’ kiss me, ‘r y’re gonna get irrita’ed with me not bein’ able t’ reach stuff without climbin’ on somethin’… ‘ow many more times can y’ take people askin’ if I’m y’r son before y’ get fed up with it?”

The way he curls in on himself makes him look so, so small and vulnerable. As if he really, truly thinks there’s something so fundamentally wrong with him that you’re going to just stop loving him one day. “Y’ can’t promise y’re gonna stick round,” he mumbles. “Y’re gonna find somethin’ y’ can’t deal with. Somethin’ about me that jus’ ain’t worth it. Always ‘appens. ‘Cause God was prob’ly fuckin’ drunk when ‘E made me. Jus’ a joke. Jus’ stupid. Go on, then, get movin’.”

You’re certain he expects you to just leave after all that. Surely, he’s said similar things to other people who’ve left him. The only thing you know about that part of his past is that he’s told you that very few people have ever stayed longer than a month or two with him, if that.

You don’t want to be like everyone else. You want to stay.

“I don’t believe God was drunk when He made you, Peter. I think He just… knew the same thing that I do.” You gently wrap your arms around your lover’s middle, pulling him closer to you. Despite the fact that he fusses a little, (making these little sounds that mean he just doesn’t know what to do with your kindness), he settles into it quickly. “You’re perfect just the way you are.”

When you get a snort of disbelief for your trouble, you simply draw him in against your chest, pressing a kiss into his hair. “If I don’t think you’re perfect, then why do I smile when I get to cuddle with you in bed? Why do I always start the applause after you and Wendy do your performance? Why do I wish you had a surname so I could imagine it following my first name?”

You only know that he’s starting to cry because of his breathing. Because he always does those short, quick, copious breaths when he’s trying not to lose control and start sobbing.

Has he ever noticed any of these things before, excepting the last one? Did he not realize just how wonderful you think he is and how happy you are that he’s alive so you get to share your life with him?

“I love you, so much.” You nestle your face into his neck, and you let your hands slip up under his shirt. “If you want me to show you just how perfect you are, I can.”

Of course… you don’t want him to think that’s all he’s good for. “Or I can just lie here and tell you every single little thing I love about you,” you whisper into his ear, before ducking back into his neck to kiss the tender skin there. “Your call, sweetheart.”

His breathing goes funny, in a different way. You wonder if he’s conflicted about which he should choose; sex or compliments. As it happens, you’re capable and willing of giving both. You’re just not about to take advantage of him in a bad moment.

At last, he shifts around to reach down, curling his fingers around yours under his shirt.

“Keep talkin’,” he murmurs. “… But keep y’r ‘and right there while y’ do.”

[chid0rita]

fer the anon event can ya make kanon matsubara icons fer @/animogameing? thats only if yer comfortable with doin bang dream stuff!

note fer them wld be: thanks fer stickin w my silly self this year, hopin we can be friends fer many more :3

if that works, hopefully that works an i aint sound weird or somethin!

Sorry I’m only doing listed sources for this event, and Bang Dream Isn’t one of my sources

[prey-to-go]

Aaaayyyy!!! Fellow demon Tony au bro. Love to see demon aus where the demon is actually nice lol. My au isn’t vore-centered (it’s a fic called The Devil’s in the Details) but as a sfw vore enthusiast I really appreciate ur au. And our demon Tony designs are so similar omg. Share the Demon Tony braincell. ANYWAY. Imagine Peter chillin’ with Tony in the lab and he wants to be closer but still wants to watch his mentor work, so they compromise and Peter ends up vibin’ in Tony’s mouth with his head stickin’ out.

Oh my god- ooooo I only read the first chapter and didn't realize you updated and had a picture!!!!!!!!! Your au is absolutely perfect and I love how you wrote Tony <3 <3 I love that our designs are so similar too- honest to god i just googles demon horns and tried out a few before settling XD y'all want to check the fic out its The Devil's in the Details

but yes a little snippet because this idea is just adorable.

A pout forms on Peter's face as he's lightly nudged away from the tools and projects strewn over the table. Normally Mr.Stark didn't mind him being on the table but today was different, mostly because his size got messed up again and he was standing at a whopping 4'' instead of his usual 11''.

He did feel exposed and very very small and weak but Mr.Stark promised to let him watch and he wasn't going to back down on that offer anytime soon. "Mr.Stark come on, it's hard to see what you're doing."

He crosses his arms, frowning at the screw driver currently blocking his view. all he could see was tools and a towering block that his mentor's hands were messing around with. He felt a little bad when the demon let an exhausted sigh out a set of sets looking to him.

"I know kiddo but I don't exactly want you close in case it goes boom." Mr.Stark says in a tone that reminded him of a toddler being scolded by their parent. Peter huffs and lifts his arms up instead.

"What if I hang out on your shoulder?"

"No."

"Head?"

"Absolutely not."

"Pocket?"

"Don't have one kid."

Peter scowls at being thwarted watching the box spark slightly when it hit him. The sparks didn't go up very high which meant-

"I got it! Hold me in your mouth!" He grins victoriously looking up to his mentor. The demon pauses before an amused smile dances over his lips. a few weeks ago Peter would've done anything to stay away from the demon but now? Now it was a comfort.

"Just hold you? Well you're certainly itty bitty enough. You sure you want to do this?" Mr.Stark murmurs. Man he loved the way his mentor would check in on him. He quickly nods grabbing up at the demon.

A wave of relief hit him when he felt the clawed fingers carefully scoop him into a loose fist. He completely disappeared in the grip but he didn't feel threatened, it just felt..safe. He was warm and surrounded by someone who obviously cared about him what more could he ask for?

He wriggles around slightly using the demon's fingers to haul himself up so he could pop his head out of the top of the fist. His insides swoop as Mr.Stark brings him closer to his face. It should scare him, he should be terrified to see the fangs and two sets of eyes focused on him but instead he felt so secure.

"You know the drill kid, if it gets to be too much say so."

Peter nods, his gaze falling to the demon's maw. There was a warm smile before Mr.Stark's lips parted and he was carefully being tilted onto the tongue, his feet pressing into the muscle. The warmth was a welcoming feeling, a small sigh escaping him as Mr.Stark completely slipped him inside.

It was a little weird being able to shift around so easily. Normally he wouldn't be tasted as much, actually at this point he normally would have his legs halfway down the demon's throat! Instead here he was comfortably laying down on the demons tongue. A giggle slipped out when the teeth close around him, the tip of the muscle poking around obviously trying to find any ticklish spots.

"M-Mr.Staaaarrrk! Y-you're 'pouse to be w-woorking!" He manages to get out, squealing in between boughts of laughter. All he get in reply is a small chuckle. He pouts shoving at the muscle a small smile on his face.

A second later he's being firmly pressed against the roof of the demon's mouth a loud swallow draining the saliva that had been building up. Cool air rushes into the wet cavern as Mr.Stark opened his mouth again. He grins and wiggles forward, leaning slightly out of the safety of his mentors mouth. He wasn't too surprised when the muscle safeguards him from accidentally poking himself on the demon's fangs. He gives a light pat to the muscle smiling sightly.

"Thanks Mr.Stark..for..for this and for putting up with me." He knew it couldn't be easy he was a handful after all. He closes his eyes for a moment, relaxing when a soft coo vibrates all around him. Reassuring he knew that, the demon had some more primal responses sometimes. "I know you don't mind but it's still nice..you know?"

More of a rumbling purr this time, he could practically hear the gentle message of 'I know and I care about you.' He smiles to himself slumping more against the plush muscle, letting it cradle his form as he peered out at the project. Oh. It was the Widow bites, well that made sense for the sparking.

"It's cool seeing you work Mr.Stark. Like you can literally make the impossible happen." Peter can't keep the childlike awe from his tone, his cheeks flushing red. A rush was warmth washed over him at an amused huff and approving hum.

"Ha so modest Mr.Stark." He teases leaning more outside the safety of his mentors mouth, whining when he was pulled back into the warmth. "Come on I know I won't fall! I'm a master at this."

A disapproving hum, the tongue curling back more making him slide more inside. "Really? Okay fine, fine I won't lean out so far." He couldn't believe the demon would swallow him over something so small. He knew what he was doing!

Peter pouts as he gets comfortable again watching his mentor work. It was nice admittedly. He felt so secure here and it was fun seeing the demon work on an avengers weapon.

Maybe he would bug the demon to order him this small another time.

[furby-organist]

// I am awake past my bedtime and not particularly eloquent which means it’s time to post, idk if this is like, an unknown quantity, but I’m like, not opposed to shipping Alexa or stickin him in NSFW situations. I have historically been frustrated by certain expectations or entitlements on the matter, but I’m not blanketly opposed to it.

I don’t usually have the thing in my brain that sees another muse and goes “hey we should ship.” That’s not a RP’ing method I feel any sort of negative way about or anything, I just don’t have the brain wires connected to make that connection. 

I also tend to let Alexa write himself (though sometimes to a fault) and my answer wrt “wanna ship?” is almost always going to be “I’m down to find ways to get our muses to interact, including situations that might bring out XYZ in each other, and see how they organically react to each other.”

I also don’t ship beyond QP, I’m singleverse, Alexa is poly. If it vibes, it vibes! I want him to make meaningful connections! This includes, but is certainly not limited to, QP stuff!

I’m also (and this one’s probably also a known quantity but w/e) not opposed to Alexa smashing. It just has to be on his own terms. (And the other party’s terms, too, of course. That’s how consent works.)

He is not conventionally seduce-able. The issue isn’t that other muses aren’t hot enough, it’s that his sexuality wires are snipped. I’ve been historically frustrated with attitudes from potential partners that treat this like a) something that can be changed, and b) something that should be changed as a form of ‘personal growth.’ Homie... he’s asexual, and not grey or demi spec. He’s sex-averse in most situations. He will never be conventionally seduce-able. That stuff either falls flat or makes him uncomfortable.

When I say “smashing has to be on his own terms” I mean I am, personally, not looking to write encounters that involve external forces, such as Valentino’s smoke, or rut, being the thing driving him to get frisky. (I hate that I have to disclaim this -- this isn’t commentary or judgment on other people writing these things. It’s a perfectly fine & interesting avenue to explore, it’s just simply not how I want to approach his sexuality.)

I am, personally, not interested in plotlines that involve him subjecting himself to these external forces to ‘experience being allo’ for a while, or worse, to make himself want to rail another muse out of... I don’t know, self-curative perspective or maintenance sex?

I write one of the few Alastors in my direct line of sight (<-- major disclaimer there) who already had his hoe phase (I’m exaggerating) and figured his shit out through baptism by fire. While that comes with pain points, it also comes with a lot of knowledge and I don’t want to write him tossing that knowledge aside to... I don’t know? He doesn’t need to figure out whether he “likes xyz” or not dawg he already TRIED it and he knows he doesn’t.

What I am okay with writing is, like I said, stuff on his own terms. “I’ll have sex if it’s really funny” is pretty legit! If something funny crosses his desk and the right person offers, he’ll say yeah! It’s really easy if you go the right avenue (and have established yourself as trustworthy enough to have a conversation about sexual negotiations with) -- I have to keep him away from Al because they’re literally a few sentences (e.x. “how does that guy fuck to this song. wtf.” “I could probably figure it out. want to join?”) from fucking.

Curiosity also is a pretty valid reason -- y’know, someone wants to brave the void, someone has an unusual shapeshift that might pique his curiosity and they invite him to check it out, etc. (He doesn’t register himself as someone who can check it out, he sort of needs to be informed haha.) A curious aroace-spec alt who’d rather not figure all this out with an allo s/o. Possibly an alt Suffering w rut because a) no touch aversion and b) look it’s a nice friendly thing to do if he likes you enough and c) pushing buttons & making ppl even needier messes can sometimes be fun hehe. (He doesn’t want anyone to help w his rut.)

He’s mentioned that he appreciates “mutual candor with a friend” which is... true! He tries really hard to leave performativity & social expectation at the door. Performative sexy sex is just... not what he’s looking for. Clownass sex stuff is just clownassery. Even non-clownass sex, like... just be honest about what’s working, what’s not, what you want him to do, PLEASE no fake moaning, you don’t need to pretend to get off, etc... just... be honest yo, he’s just a friend, this is just stupid naked bullshit.

I forgot where I was going with this lol xoxo

[jaypsnax]

Another post! Ranging from oldest to newest, yet again. Which is actually a bit sad, since I think some of the earlier stuff came out better. Suppose that might be a consequence of trying to get so many ideas out(I drew most of these today), since my brain’s just been FLOODED with them. Kind of. Not all of them are the ideas I want at the moment, but I just work with what I’m given. Also I think this format of post with big chunks of art and then commentary below is one that kinda fits me well, but also makes me really impatient, since sometimes I make something I feel the need to show immediately. Yet at the same time... it’s easier to click that post button when it’s just one over several individual posts. Also feel like bad putting things in the tags that way. Which is a bit contradictory, considering I end up having to tag more characters and such... just brain logic, go with it. Lots and LOTS of thoughts below the cut, mostly about Beffica.

1st: Just another Buddy here, really. I was a bit in between ideas and couldn’t figure out what I really wanted to do. Plus it was practice for adjusting their design. Messing with the teeth primarily, and the bag just kinda... happened. Replacement for the Snaxscope that I’d previously been drawing there. Dunno if I’ll keep it... on one hand I like shoulder strap looks and messenger bags are sick as hell, but it’s rather disruptive for the character silhouette. We’ll see what happens. Also my fine detail stuff for them is really inconsistent and I feel like I kinda lost something that made me rlly like the design before??? So that’ll be a thing to hash out in the coming days. If I can get myself to focus, of course. 2nd: Here’s a favorite of mine that took some real doing. I was working on it most of yesterday and most of the brainwork came down to figuring out how the hell to pose everyone. I found the thought of them all splayed out in bed super damn cute, and while it ultimately came out less goofy than I actually wanted it to... I still like it. Shoutout to drawing along the edges too much and making fitting in Big Tall Filbo difficult. Maybe I can fudge it by saying I can see him as the sort of person to hang his leg off the side of the bed :p Especially if it’s hot. Fan on, leg stickin’ outta the side. Then aside from that, Buddy being too tired to actually fully take everything off and just plop down w the hat and loosened collar ‘n tie... fucking yum. It’s not a detail I intended originally, but I wanted to kinda... maintain the design I’d kept for them while also not having them straight up in bed fully decked out. Compromise! 3rd: Heere starts the Beffica focus... at least for a little while. Dunno what it is, but she’s always appealed to me. Despite the mean girl schtick, or perhaps because of that schtick, I gravitated towards her. After the initial slight wincing at the first drops of “Zonk off”, “Squeeb”, and the abbreviations she uses. Seems to be fairly common for me to find a character I initially dislike or is just a jerk, and then turn around and say “Actually no I LIKE them dangit”. And see, the thing about her is that she has those nuggets of tasty character that shed a fair bit of light on why she acts the way she does after the initial negative opinion. A shared trait with Floofty. She’s made mistakes that drove the people she considered friends away, and ended up sticking to the very habits that likely caused such rifts on Snaktooth as well. Which is exactly why, well, she isn’t really in a good relationship with anyone. But you. And she admits that even your own relationship is tenuous at best ‘cos she just started calling you bestie from the outset and you ran with it. She figures it’s probably only a matter of time until she drives you away too. Despite how she acts, it seems like she still really doesn’t... like herself that much. Doing her quests is just going further down that rabbit hole and continually indulging her bad habits. Y’know, like most of the other inhabitants. Beff sees what she’s doing as a GOOD thing and believes the worst of people. And starts off seeing the worst with Wiggle betraying Gramble’s trust like she does, but then as things go along there’s less and less for her to find. Cromdo just... dances and sings at night. Chandlo is a perfectly nice guy, but she completely denies that he doesn’t have any deep dark secret. Otherwise it’s furthering her reliance on Bugsnax, which you could say she’s one of the worst cases of. She’s not the most likable character, but she is definitely one of the most interesting. I reckon she probably did see some pretty bad shit to make her think the way she does. It doesn’t justify her actions, but taking the time to understand her offers a lot of insight. It’s ironic too that despite Floofty’s shaky at best morality... Beff takes the cake on the grey morality and is probably up there with the hardest Grumpuses to sympathize with. And despite that, I latch on. Then, of course, once you get to the end of the game... it seems she’s been doing some thinking. And intends to do better for herself, which presumably means doing better by the people she’s friends with too. Which I personally have thought of developments for. Like actually forwarding her relationship with the Journalist and, of all Grumpuses, Filbo. For how much she seems to address him personally and the focus on interactions between those two. Which lead into all my thoughts about either close friend group or straight out poly w em. I had more ideas for developments with her which I’ll expand on shortly, aside from mentioning that I very explicitly thought of her actually apologizing to some of the people she wronged. Especially Snorpy. But to actually address the damn drawing and not talk forever on character analysis... obviously there’s something different here, yeah? The idea for the triple heart locket thing admittedly just came to me on spur of the moment while I was thinking about Buddy, actually. How I wanted to adjust their design and such. Absentmindedly drifted over @/Yejomo’s(I hope they don’t mind me mentioning them by name?) take on them with their post-Snaktooth design change. I thought “What if Beff’s design changed and she got extra lockets for the two people she’s hooked up with? And so it was done. 4th: HAHA HEY SPEAKING OF @/YEJOMO.... this piece was shamelessly inspired by the Beffica and Floofty art they did yesterday. Or was it the day before yesterday? I don’t know time <3 But yeah just two unlikely pals talking it up over some tea. (”You drink tea? I thought you’d be like... more of a coffee type or something.”) (”Mm, well. You would be half right in your assumption. Coffee for work, tea for pleasure. You may be able to envision how little I get to have of the latter as of late.”) That’s not what would be in the dialogue bubbles. Just what was in my head. Also inspired by the Floofty/Beffica dynamic of that one fic I’d mentioned before, with them becoming friends and collaborating. It’s not what you would expect, but surprisingly, I think I could see it work. Maybe. Anyway, you can really tell I’m not used to structuring scenes or drawing things that characters are actually... interacting with in some form. But it’s decent enough. Poor right leg on Beff though. I think that’s gonna need some medical attention. 5th, 6th, 7th: Now.... we get to the final stretch. Good on you if you’ve made it this far and no shame if you haven’t. I’m just writing chapter length posts for the sake of it out here. These draws stem from one of the previous discussion posts I made about Buddy going freelance after losing their job. Journalism kinda basically turned detective work. In my brain, it makes total sense of Beffica to participate when: 1. She already had a background in Journalism, and explicitly in digging up dirt on people. 2. Despite her cynicism of people, it seems like she does still have a fairly good judge of character. 3. She has some sense of justice probably, considering the fact that she goes out of her way to expose Cromdo’s crimes and tell him that she won’t let him get away with doing those sorts of things. 4. In my way of things, she... y’know, hooks up with Buddy and that’s just extra motivation. I see it as a way of Buddy continuing to do what they seem to have a real knack for, and after the whole Grumpinati affair... maybe even keep up to date on potentially relevant information and up to snuff on their skills. And also as a way for Beffica to exercise the skills she has in a setting where they can be used positively. Keep an eye on Buddy too, for personal reasons and for Filbo. In this instance, it’s about Buddy conducting and interview and by the end, Beff calling that she can easily smell there’s some covering up. There was going to be extra panels of her saying “I don’t know WHY they’re lying. I just know that they’re not telling the truth.”, but I didn’t quite get around to it and I burnt my brain out a little. And that’s it!

[parrishh]

hey w!!! for the lil 5 song playlists, my angel adam parrish pls? 💛✨💫

THANK U

the way that i just absolutely Love him

1) stuck with me the neighbourhood

“i got caught up in the forest, hangin’ with the trees, realized i’m less important than i thought i’d be” & “couldn’t be more different than me, so each time we agree, i feel fulfilled, you always end up stickin’ to me somehow”

2) how do you feel? the maine

“how do you feel? what’s your condition? you are alive, but are you living?” & “do your hands shake? does your heart break when the earth quakes? whatever it is, whatever it isn’t, make sure that it’s real”

3) bigcitydreams never shout never

“pack up all my things and get my ass out of town. the summer is a bummer if you can’t leave this pathetic excuse for a town that holds all your memories, a lifetime of crushes and your broken dreams to be anywhere but here”

4) hilo olivver the kid (ft. armors)

“if you saw me for what i am, would you leave without warning?” & “hilo the rain hits the window, my old scars are healing they’re on the mend” & “the clock it stopped around 4am, it’s been that way for 12 months, there’s a comfort in knowing that twice a day things aren’t all wrong” & “maybe i’m overreacting, passed the tracks of the mountains always staring back at me”

5) mess real friends

“it feels like i’ve been taking the long way for a while now, haven’t been at home in more years than i care to say, i keep letting my past cover what the present shouldn’t be” & “i’m letting go so i don’t lose myself, i’m starting to be where i need to be”

send me a ship (or friendship or familyship or rivalry) (or just a character) and i’ll make a 5-song playlist for them!

[freddiesaysalright]

Tale as Old as Time - Prologue

Rami!Prince Adam x Reader

Summary: A prince cursed. A young woman aching for adventure. The classic tale of seeing beauty within.

Word Count: 1.6k

Tag List:  @psychosupernatural​, @someone-get-a-medic​, @bensrhapsody​, @deakyclicks​, @crazylittlethingcalledobsession​, @minigranger​, @crazyweirdocalledfriday​, @the-moving-finger-writes​, @assembledherethevolunteers​, @rose-writes-prose​, @queenlover05​, @26-7-49​, @drowsebaby​, @im-an-adult-ish​ If you’d like to be added, let me know!

A/N: Okay, y’all we’re kicking off fairy tales with Beauty and the Beast with Rami! I’m putting my own spin on the classic tales, so this isn’t the prologue you’re familiar with. Even so, I hope you enjoy!

Warning(s): None!

Moodboard

Prologue here we go!!!

A frigid wind stirred the young prince from his sleep. He opened his eyes and looked around, pulling his covers tighter around him. He was frightened, but he thought that twelve was too old to be calling for his mother. His eyes began to adjust and he took in the familiar forms of his bedroom furniture. 

He rolled over. His window was mysteriously wide open. With a sigh, he threw the blankets off and padded over to close it. The cold night air made him shiver. As he reached out to push the glass back into the frame, the door burst open.

Startled, he whipped around, coming face to face with his mother. She was white as a ghost and her hair was falling out of its usual neat bun. It frightened him to see her so frantic.

“Rami,” she panted. “Rami, we must leave. Now. Your father, he - he’s done something. We’re not safe here.”

Fear crawled to the front of his heart.

“What’s going on?” he wondered.

“Shh! Keep your voice low,” she whispered. “I can’t explain now, but we don’t have much time. Hurry, pack your things!”

He dashed over to his wardrobe. He snatched up a bag, some clothes, and his traveling cloak. He stepped into his boots and looked back at his mother as he tied them on. She kept glancing between the door and window, as if any second, some monster might appear there and it would be too late.

“Okay, Mother, I’m ready,” he said.

“Come on, quick,” she hissed, taking his hand.

They hurried down the corridor, faster than Rami’s legs could carry him. He had never seen his mother in such a panic, and his mind was awhirl with questions. Somehow, he understood that he could ask none of them until they were safely away.

The walls of the palace felt suddenly like bars on a jail, and he and his mother were making a desperate break for freedom. He wondered where his father was and what he could have done to force them to such desperation. 

At the end of the hall, Rami saw the chaos. Servants were fleeing with all their belongings. The housekeeper, Mrs. Carson, was begging them to stay, tears streaming down her face. 

“You can’t abandon them now!” she cried to one of the footmen. 

“I ain’t stickin’ to find out what that crazy woman’s gonna do to him!” he shot back, and then took off.

The queen brought Rami to a halt, and pushed him up against the wall, pressing herself beside him. She watched carefully until the way was clear. She even waited for Mrs. Carson to leave. Rami found this odd. Mrs. Carson was one of the most trusted people in the palace. What could be so bad that she couldn’t know he and his mother were leaving? Who was the crazy woman the footman was talking about? 

“Mother, what’s -” Rami began, unable to stand it anymore.

“Hush!” she snapped. “Please, my darling, I’ll explain everything later.”

Tears of hurt and confusion welled up in his eyes, but he nodded resolutely.

Slowly, they crept down the main hall to the stairs. It was a back stairwell that led to the corridor just outside the throne room. As they flew down the stairs, the noise became louder. Rami heard a hideous screech, so piercing that he stopped and covered his ears.

“Keep moving!” his mother cried over the din. “Please, Rami!”

More frightened than ever, he pushed on, following his mother as closely as possible. They had to sneak by the small entrance to the throne room, where he peered in and saw a woman - the most beautiful he had ever seen. But terrifying. She was golden all over, from her hair to the hem of her dress, and appeared to glow as she glided toward the king. 

“All these years, you have kept the debt you owed me,” she said. 

Her voice was musical. A sweet soprano with a dangerous edge.

“Please,” the king heaved through a deep breath. He was struggling to stand as well. “I’ll give you anything you want...I just -”

“It’s too late!” she barked at him. “That debt was owed long ago. Now, you will pay the ultimate price.”

She got closer to the king. Rami’s eyes went wide.

“Come, Rami,” the queen urged her son, taking his hand again. “We must hurry.”

They bustled away, but Rami heard his father’s scream. He squeezed his eyes shut, letting the tears fall now.

The prince and queen burst out to the snowy yard, making for the stables. She quickly began saddling her horse with their small bags of essentials. She helped Rami up first and then mounted behind him, wrapping her arms around his thin frame. She took a pause.

“No matter what happens, Rami, know that I love you very much,” she said, with such intensity that at first Rami struggled to respond.

“I love you too, Mother,” he finally choked out.

She smiled, and for a moment, nothing was happening. She was the mother he always knew - warm, calm, and kind. But the moment was fleeting, and they had to go. She pressed her heels into the horse’s side and they made their way through the garden.

Rami absurdly took notice of the roses. His mother had grown them herself, and other than Rami, they were her pride and joy. Each bloom was a deep, rich red. They looked like blood against the white of the snow.

They went through the garden at a slow clip clop. The queen was staying low, forcing Rami to do the same. It was clear she didn’t want to draw attention to them. They were just feet from the gate.

Suddenly, a shadow swept over them, and the golden woman appeared, blocking their path. She smiled, but it was not friendly. It was a threat. Rami could feel his mother’s trembling with his own.

“Whatever my husband owed you, we will pay it twice over, just -”

“Silence!” the woman shouted, with an upstroke of her arm.

The horse whinnied and reared back, throwing the queen and prince off. Rami heard his mother’s cry of surprise and the thud of her hitting the ground. Frightened, he scrambled to his knees to look over. She was alarmingly still.

He could not focus on the heartbreak. The golden woman was bearing down on him. The prince recoiled, trying to get away, but he wasn’t fast enough. The woman was upon him. He looked at her through watery eyes, skin burning from where the cold brushed his wet cheeks.

“I can’t let you carry on the line of traitors,” she said.

“I - I haven’t done anything to you,” Rami stammered. “Don’t you know mercy, enchantress?”

She smirked, but the expression made him feel sick.

“I do know mercy, child,” she said. “Your punishment will not be to die. You will live, but not as yourself.”

“W-what do you mean?” he questioned.

“You will see,” she returned ominously.

She held out her hand. With wide eyes, he watched gold orbs float toward him. Millions of them, lighting up his face and clothes. It was almost peaceful.

Then. 

Excruciating pain. Every muscle felt like it was ripping apart. He shrieked and thrashed on the ground, unaware of the biting chill of the snow. His body felt like it was on fire, from his eyes to his toes, like he was contorting and stretching unnaturally. Just when he thought she was killing him, it stopped.

Chest heaving and tears falling, Rami caught his breath. He tried to sit up, but his body felt heavier than he remembered. He also felt warmer than he was earlier. He looked around and saw his clothes in shreds around him. He looked wildly up at the enchantress.

“What have you done?” he demanded, but his voice was not his own. It was deeper and had a growl he was not accustomed to.

She held out her hand, and a golden hand mirror appeared there. She held it out to him. He took it and turned the glass toward himself. He bit back another scream.

His face was gone! He was covered in hair. Sharp teeth protruded from his mouth. Horns sat on his head. The hand holding the mirror was actually a grizzly paw, with claws and everything. More tears formed. His eyes were all that remained of the body he was born with.

“What have you done?” he asked again, trying to ignore the rumbly sound from his chest.

“I am keeping you from marrying,” she said. “This is a curse, child.”

His lip trembled, and he wished that he had not begged for this kind of mercy.

“Before you despair, hope is not lost,” she continued. She plucked a rose from the bush beside her and offered it to him the same way she had the mirror. “This rose will bloom until your twenty-fifth year. You have until the last petal falls.”

“To do what?” he wondered.

“To find true love,” she said. “True love will break the curse.”

“But how can I find true love as a - a beast?!”

“You will have to find a love to see the prince beneath the beast,” she explained. “True love finds beauty within.”

“And if I don’t find true love in time?” he asked.

“Then you will remain a beast until the end of your days,” she said solemnly. 

“This is cruel,” he whimpered.

“It is payment,” she returned sternly. “Farwell, little prince. And good luck.”

With a wicked laugh, she faded away, leaving Rami stricken in the snow. He had never felt so helpless. He had no family, he lost his body, and he had an impossible task. He looked at himself in the mirror again. 

Who could ever learn to love a beast?

[thethirdwheel404]

Med Rewatch Series (#16)

S3 E16: An Inconvenient Truth.

Episode description: After taking the lead on a surgery, Dr. Bekker feels the heat after something goes wrong. Dr. Manning and Dr. Charles are faced with a tough decision concerning the gender of a 9-year-old girl.

YOOO okay. Big Ava ep, ig. Also, in the previous breakdown I talked about how Ava seems to be losing her confidence, which leads directly into this ep, the prophesized panic attack/breakdown episode. How exciting. I will say, good lead in, from the previous episode.

Let’s get into it.

- connor will bromance is tops

- maggie waiting for sarah by the elevators, tapping the charge phone anxiously. nice of her. she cares.

- sarah just... watching. from the outside. it’s so interesting. bc most people whose fmaily members are getting worked on are emotional, and sarah is, but she also knows a good deal. just the... little signs of anxiety. the way her eyes just scan the scene

- sarah not going up with them

- sarah doing mental calculations, you can see it. trying to figure out if its worth ‘it’

- personally, no, bc getting close to him means inevitably leaving chicago and ava so

- connor covering for sarah. chef’s kiss. good for him

- noah trying to help sarah is nice, and funny, and a little exhausting.

- sarah in the basic white top. v professional

- noah’s ‘yes sir.’ respect the patient. (especially bc april knows him)

- OOOO AVA WITH ROLLED UP SLEEVES hahaha wowwww

- i just took a very deep breath

- ava smiling and poking fun at connor. you love to see it.

- god their back and forth is just fantastic

- connor: “are you rooting for my success?”

- ava: “not at all, i just hate winning by default.” - the way she enunciated that so deep!

- she’s confident again (that will change)

- why must she suffer. i am so scared

- god, everytime she’s on screen, i’m just like.. . <3<3<3

- ava sits back and lets them talk. let’s them set the details of the case, before she gives her two cents

- oh god she’s gonna mess up i am so fucking scared to see her like that

- like excited too but still

- AVA SUBTLY ROLLING HER EYES AT CONNOR DISAGREEING WITH HER. RAISING AN EYEBROW

- ava being so cocky with connor. it’s what she deserves

- ava immediately accusing connor of messing up? dare I say,,, defense mechanism.

- maggie telling noah to back off. good.

- the tremble in ava’s voice when she realizes it’s her suction cup, and her trying to push forward

- ava lashing out at connor

- the shake in her voice as she pushes herself as far as she can w/o breaking in the surgery

- she cannot get out of there fast enough

- aw no she’s sad

- if they kiss rn i’m gonna jump off a bridge

- GOD SAD AVA HITS SO HARD

- like, just everything. the way she leans against the lockers -

- connor misreading ava so hard. thinking she’s worried about her reputation, when really she just almost killed her patient. she cares about her patient’s well being, not her rep.

- this story where noah pretends to be this patient’s son is actually such a good moment. he’s a good guy.

- sarah being floored by this act of kindness

- sarah and her backpack again!

- sarah and noah talking is nice. know why? bc he is the only person she interacts with regularly that isn’t charles. she actually gets to have a conversation w/o ungodly amounts of stress and weight on her. she gets to smile! thank god for that

- ava, standing in latham’s office, tense, arms held behind her, standing at attention. (you can obviously tell that she’s anxious)

- connor trying to take the fall for ava. come on. (okay, you can make the argument that he knows his rep will carry him through. using his privilege for good?)

- and the annoyance (or confusion, i can’t tell) on her face

- YOOOO WHAT. THAT IS LIKE THE FIFTH TIME SHE’S OPENED THE DOOR FOR HIM. okay come on what is this pattern i’m seeing. honestly. this is insane

- GODDDDDD the adorable little shoulder bump?!?!?! bros to the max. that is adorable holy shit

- her small little smile (at this point i don’t even have to point it out, it’s pedantic)

- this ava/connor interaction and banter is peak

- william is an idiot

Okay. Honestly, not as big of an Ava ep as I thought. What did we get to see? Well, we saw what happens when she messes up at work, when she experiences a lot of stress/anxiety. This was specifically related to the well being of her patient and her not trusting (to an extent) her own abilities. Oddly enough, the anxiety resolved itself, so i don’t think there are any loose threads.

This ep did contribute to Connor’s hero complex, as well so...

We got to see Sarah have a positive conversation with Noah, which means she smiled, which is always good.

Specific to the rewrite, I don’t really see any details that need to be overwritten. All the storylines in this episode were really good, not that messy at all. So...

At the most, this ep gave us Ava under anxiety, panicking. But not so much as to make impulsive decisions. This actually wasn’t really a panic, it was more fear. she was scared of her abilities, of her mistakes. (I argue that under anxiety, high stress, not necessarily fear, she makes impulsive decisions, like sleeping with Connor, which I argued in a previous post). That is what happens under anxiety. Under fear, she starts to panic, breaks down.

So, yeah, if you believe me and think that she only slept with Connor out of anxiety, then now we’ve seen two sides of Ava’s negative thoughts. This has actually been good work

thanks for stickin with it. i am so sorry.

[billdenbrough]

so, a while ago, @audraphillipps tagged this post with a tag saying that bichie were on ron/harry levels, and like... i have literally not stopped thinking about it since? i was talking to @neibolttrio when nat’s reblog popped up on my dash and i went completely feral (ara can confirm, and also was right there with me) bc there’s just like. so much there!!

i know i said in the neville/eddie ask that i tend to think mapping characters onto each other is reductive, and i stand by that (there’s a difference between loose parallels and trying to make them fit neatly, you know? and sometimes equating the characters isn’t the most effective way to express that), and it’s not even what nat was saying, but like. there are parallels

just to get the basics down: bill/harry, richie/ron

(which is interesting bc @benverlesbians and i were having a discussion (well, in tags) where i posited stan as logos and eddie as pathos, and bc jem is galaxy brain, she carried it home to position richie as ethos, and i stand by our choices, but for the golden trio, i’d put harry as ethos and ron as pathos and hermione as logos (like i think there’s other combinations that fit too, but i think this fits best for me), which is interesting. not bc i think the parallels need to map perfectly, but it’s just really fucking fascinating to me how people can shift in different contexts, like new dynamics lead to new positionings... [siken vc: what can you know about a person? they shift in the light. you can’t light up all sides at once] anyway tangent over)

like on the most basic of levels, bill leads his friendship group, and richie is his Loyal Best Friend who follows him everywhere, even places he doesn’t want to go (ron LITERALLY invokes the idea of following. “follow the spiders,” he says, twelve and terrified and going anyway, because harry’s going, because hermione’s hurt and needs them, because hagrid’s been accused, because ron loves his friends)

i think something we don’t talk about super often (at least recently, i don’t want to presume about earlier content i missed) is how anger plays its part in bill’s story, in terms of the degree to which it motivates his quest to kill It. like at one point in the book he even frames it as “using his friends, risking their lives — to settle the score for his dead brother”, which i think is indicative of the anger/desire for revenge that drives it (and that’s not all that motivates him, but it’s definitely a major component)—-that sense of revenge isn’t present as much in the films, mostly because bill is desperate to try hold onto the idea that georgie is still alive (haha, harry after sirius goes through the veil, anyone?), but it’s still there, i think, mostly in the moments bill charges off (even when all his friends are shouting at him to wait or not go) bc he’s so determined that It won’t get away, not this fucking time. and that’s something true of harry too, the way his anger can consume him. we see it throughout the whole series, but order of the phoenix is the most relevant part rn, with how enraged he is after sirius’ death. how gasping and jagged and burning with fury he is. he tries to hurt bellatrix, wants to hurt her in ways we’ve never seen from him, and it’s desperate furious grief leading him to chase her from the room with the veil. and there’s a line, a little later, that always hits me in the chest: when harry is shouting I DON’T CARE and destroying dumbledore’s office, the reply is “you care so much you feel as though you will bleed to death with the pain of it”. which honestly is just generally applicable to the losers, given how much heart they have and how much trauma they endure, but i look at baby book bill, with his revenge-seeking, and i look at jaeden’s bill, with his trembling voice but resolute expression as he gives the “walking into this house is easier than walking into my own” speech, and this quote hits me in the chest

(wrt the bill quote abt risking their lives: it’s important, i think, bc it’s incredibly cognisant of what he’s asking, which is illuminating. but ig to balance it against some things losers say, so that it’s... like he leads them there, absolutely, but they all follow him, and that’s important too. they do choose to, and their choice matters, it’s not just on him. anyway something eddie says, while looking at bill (and it’s not like. in the context of dying for bill’s quest, but it’s got the love and hero worship mention that suggests it applies to more than just the moment), “some stuff has to be done even if there is a risk. that’s the first important thing i ever found out i didn’t find out from my mother”. also, when the werewolf has bill, he’s shouting for richie to go, to get out, and richie stays and tries to save him instead. and i think both their choices there matter)

richie, as much as he Jokes, is one of the more pragmatic and resourceful losers, and really fucking smart, and so often underestimated. (hello, master strategist ron weasley. hello, prefect who literally nobody expected. hello, insecurity) like... we all know how richie is brainy, but also, like. when he’s not clouded by his own fears, he sees things with clarity so sharp it could cut you. (“It’s a monster,” Richie said flatly. “Some kind of monster. Some kind of monster right here in Derry. And it’s killing kids.”) there’s a line, bill says it when talking abt richie and eddie in fights, and it’s about how richie simply can’t keep his mouth shut, like he has to insult bowers, even when he’s got his hands on him. which is actually pretty harry energy, but ron’s the closest thing amongst any of the hp characters to a trashmouth, ron’s the one who doesn’t hesitate to be rude on behalf of his friends (harry tends to be worked up when he says these things; ron’s just naturally got that energy. “light reading? that’s light reading?” is the same energy as “can only virgins see this? is that why i’m not seeing this shit?” don’t @ me), ron’s the one who drags harry for filth when he’s being an idiot. ron follows harry, even when he’s mad about it. and boy oh boy. richie is ambitious, richie is always practicing his Voices because he wants them to be worth a damn one day, richie is constantly trying. and ron’s erised is based in simply wanting to stand out in a family full of people he thinks are more interesting or valued than him, amongst best friends who are more incredible, which is a different motivation, sure, but look at his dreams. look at how high he rises when he lets himself want it. richie’s always doing Voices because it’s easier to Pretend to be someone else than be himself, and ron is constantly scrabbling for purchase in a world where he thinks he’ll never be worthy

(there’s room for discussion about how ron’s fears are primarily creature based—spiders, werewolves, the grim; how sirius hurt him, even unintentionally, how he was betrayed by peter, how his father was attacked by a snake, how his brother was attacked by a werewolf—and how richie has his famous werewolf, but that’s more abstract of an analysis than i’m doing here, i’m just thinking about the parallels, so this is more throwing a thought out.)

and, boy oh boy. my favourite part of this. i mean, we get ron and harry always together (consider: neibolt house (in the book, when bill and richie go there; in the film, when they’re confronting the doors, separated from eddie) as their chamber of secrets), them being best friends, ron having harry’s back even against his own family (ron angrily tearing up percy’s letter and calling him a git, esp after harry doesn’t know how to react in a way that doesn’t show how much it upsets him, has my entire fucking heart), harry having ron as “what [he’ll] sorely miss”... but. but but but. we also have the goblet of fire fight. even more crucially, we have the blow up in deathly hallows. they fight, they fight, and it’s bad. harry and bill you could compare a little with their focus, ig, but the crucial part is ron and richie. ron throws harry’s parents in his face when he’s terrified for his family (and under the influence of a horcrux); richie says georgie’s dead and for the first time all film, doesn’t take it back, not when eddie’s gone and stanley’s terrified and ben’s leaking blood and richie doesn’t want to die, doesn’t want his friends to die. it’s best friends fighting viciously, with something too sharp to hold—-it’s words that cut like knives, fists in the middle of the street and leaving when they’ve always followed you.

but. it’s also coming back. when harry needs him, ron is there. they haven’t had a chance to talk about anything, but ron is saving him. when bev goes missing, when bill goes to richie, even though thing are still fractured, still angry, richie comes back. richie follows. even when they haven’t talked about anything as far as we can tell, even when there’s no resolution to their fight, richie’s the one who stands up and makes the choice that mobilises the losers, the one who tells bill everything bad that’s happened from following him but follows him yet again, doesn’t leave him behind, stays and saves him. it’s about the coming back, the saving, the i’d follow you anywhere of it all. like god but georgie/bill is the dynamic that informs chapter one & richie/bill is the dynamic that drives it // lily/harry is the dynamic that informs the hp series but ron/harry is the one that bookends it—-the first person he ever chooses, who ever chooses him in return, and he’s right there at the end, when all is well. billrichie ronharry best friend RIGHTS

not really part of this but other things that make me scream: bill and richie on silver when richie’s catatonic/harry and ron when ron’s out of it bc of the brains (and also, now that i think abt it, injured from sirius’ bite). ron clinging to harry’s side in the forbidden forest w aragog/“i’m stickin’ with you, big bill”. ron imitating harry’s parseltongue to get to the chamber of secrets, taking hermione down the path they took/richie remembering confronting the doors with bill, trying to take eddie down the path they took.

[cheetahleopard]

Hello! I made a 25 songs-long playlist of soukoku songs! It tracks the progression of their dynamic in the fic I have planned! See below the cut for the song list in order and the reason for their placement~ Feel free to send in asks about the fic, this playlist mostly tracks Chuuya’s perspective

Thank God That I’m Not You- The Himalayas 

 “I'm such a sinner/Yeah have been since birth/...But I could be so much worse/Oooo oooo/Thank God I'm not you” Young Soukoku’s feelings about each other

Worst in Me- Unlike Pluto

“Playing games from the start/Sinking your nails in my heart/You bring out the worst in me/Nothing, no nothing can change you/I decided to play when I knew you were fire” Chuuya’s view of Dazai as they grow

Devil’s Backbone- The Civil Wars

“Don't care if he's guilty, don't care if he's not/He's good and he's bad and he's all that I've got/Oh Lord, Oh Lord, I'm begging you please/Don't take that sinner from me” Dazai’s feelings when Chuuya is in the hospital after the first use of Corruption since Chuuya became Arahabaki- realizes he’s in love

I Feel Like I’m Drowning- Two Feet

“My life's okay/Just when you're not around me/My life's okay/I feel like I'm drowning/I'm drowning/You're holding me down” Chuuya pretending that life without Dazai is easier- the thought of Dazai holds him down

Dangerous (feat. Joywave)- Big Data

“You understand, I got a plan for us/I bet you didn't know that I was dangerous/It must be fate, I found a place for us/I bet you didn't know that someone could love you this much” Dazai’s thoughts after Chuuya fully recovers

Despicable- Grandson

“The goodbye is the hardest part/When we find ourselves back at the start/...One day you will understand/Why I pushed you away as I am/And you will find a better man than I am/Trust, I'm doing you a favor, doing you a favor” Dazai’s thoughts after Oda dies, about himself and his direction in life. A bit of foreshadowing of Chuuya later understanding he does better and is a better man w the ADA

Grenade- Bruno Mars

“Yes I would die for you, baby/But you won't do the same” Chuuya realizes Dazai left the mafia. Chuuya interprets that he cared for Oda more than he cared for Chuuya

I Feel Like I’m Drowning- Two Feet

“My life's okay/Just when you're not around me/My life's okay/I feel like I'm drowning/I'm drowning/You're holding me down” Chuuya pretending that life without Dazai is easier- the thought of Dazai holds him down

my boy- Billie Eilish

“My boy/Don't love me like he promised/...My boy/He ain't a man, and sure as hell ain't honest” Chuuya beginning to accept that Dazai betrayed them (he isn’t sure if “them” is the mafia or himself)

Every Lie- My Darkest Days

“Trying to undo the love that I'm tied to/Who haven't you lied to?” Chuuya trying to untangle his feelings about both Dazai and Dazai’s betrayal

Learning to Hate You as a Self-Defense Mechanism- Flatsound

“You were always a shitty friend/And you would leave when I got sick/You never called me on my birthday/I want to call you on your birthday/So I'll hold on to this feeling/I'll hold on to this hate/For as long as I need/For it to help me” Chuuya lying to himself about his true feelings about Dazai. He convinces himself he hates Dazai and throws himself whole-heartedly into the feeling

Wish You Never Met Me- Papa Roach

“I am just giving up us” Chuuya subconsciously crying over Dazai’s leaving and refusing to admit it because he wouldn’t miss Dazai, after all, he (convinced himself he) hated Dazai

State of My Head- Shinedown

“Oh, our flag is tattered/And our bones are shattered/But it doesn't matter/'Cause we're movin' forward” Chuuya continues moving forward and pushing himself even as it hurts

Gravity- Hollywood Undead

“I think of you now and then/The memories never end when/Gravity pulls you in/...Now I'm sitting, wishing that/Wishing I could just go back/I was happy with no fame” Chuuya starts flirting with using Corruption and just letting go.

Darkside- Shinedown

“Because you're in deep, resisting repeats/Face forward and don't come unhinged/I've got the actors and all these bastards/That took all the fun out of rage and revenge/Don't be so quick to judge, reign havok from above” Chuuya is at the point where he has to resist Corruption everytime he uses his gift, and it’s wearing on him

Bury Me Face Down- grandson

“I won't go quietly, I'm bringin' my crown/When I go into the ground/Oh, they gotta bury me, bury me face down” Chuuya fights and fights Corruption and now it seems that’s all he does

Best Friend to Enemy- 78rpm

“Best friend to enemy/That's what you are to me/...Used to speak ten times a day/Now I don't give a damn what you say/Everything said without a word” Chuuya finds out Dazai’s alive

I Hate Everything About You- Three Days Grace

“I hate/You hate/I hate/You love me/I hate everything about you/Why do I love you” Chuuya fights with the feelings he buried and never got over, especially after Dazai reveals he’s loved Chuuya all along

Very Good Bad Thing- Mother Mother

“Try to get out but we just keep stickin' around/Cuz it is a very good bad thing we've found.” Chuuya and Dazai talk- Chuuya finds that Dazai’s betrayal of the mafia changed him for the better

I Only Lie When I Love You- Royal Blood

“I only lie when I love you/I only crawl when I hit the ground” Chuuya fights against his love for Dazai returning- even as he can tell it’s a healthier love than before

I Almost Told You I Love You- Papa Roach

“I almost told you that I loved you/Thank God I didn't 'cause it would have been a lie” Chuuya’s feelings get stronger, and he nearly blurts out that he loves Dazai on a joint mission and he denies it in his head even more vehemently after that, even as he starts to accept it

Irresistible- temposhark

“Bad and wrong but love don't get any better/Dress undone you're still my favorite taboo, whoo-oo/You and me are irresistible/You and me are indestructible” Chuuya feels himself draw into the old patterns with Dazai- the banter and the feeling of working together... but he half-fears-half-anticipates it’ll turn into a toxic partnership again

Stripped- Depeche Mode

“Let me see you/Stripped down to the bone/Let me hear you/Make decisions” Chuuya and Dazai talk after Chuuya gives into new fears and old temptations and uses corruption before Dazai arrives at the scene. It’s a very deep talk about all of Chuuya’s fears, Dazai’s true feelings, and their formal confession.

Au Volant- Elsa & Emilie

“I got my mind set on the sunny place/Where we can rest our case/I got my mind set on the sunset/Where we can go and push reset/And call it off” Part of the conversation, where Dazai reminisces about how they used to be. How bad the environment was for him and how toxic their relationship would have been for them then.

Fool- Cavetown

“I am just a fool to keep on chasing after nothing great/You are just a fool to keep pretending that you're loving me/I don't know where I'm supposed to go” Part of the conversation, where Chuuya talks about how bad those in-between years were, how hard it was to keep corruption at bay

Feel Invincible- Skillet

“Hey, hey, hey when I need to be saved/You're making me strong, you're making me stand/Never will fall, never will end/Shot like a rocket up into the sky/Nothing could stop me tonight/You make me feel invincible” Chuuya and Dazai now know where they stand, and do their best to support each other, and doubleblack rises again, better than ever- and they’re proud to know that shin soukoku has grown as well

[soldierwatch]

ஃ  ➡  Local Ghost Spits Affection // @pettythieveswithpotential​

My Opinion on;

Character in general: i can say with genuine certainty that i have truly Adored every muse of yours i’ve been honored to interact with. they’re all so unique & intriguing, complex characters in their own rights with enrapturing stories & personalities. they’re all so CLEVER, fate, such a fantastic span of cast members ;; jasper, to the trouble children, to what i’ve been gifted of your beau, & everyone in between—they’ve all provided truly wonderful experiences & excellent muses to throw my own against. ;w; i love each & every one of your punks ,, How they play them: with such clear CLARITY from one character to the next ; there’s no OVERLAPPING, each one of them clearly different in their mannerisms & dialogue ; they’re distinctly THEIR OWN persons, a feat that’s Impressive As Hell from one talented mun :eyes: The Mun:  fate ilusm ,, i can’t elaborate as much as i’d like bc. words ? don’t know those ,, i just. i get into a mess of squishy exclamation points when i think of you bc i adore you sm !!!!!! thanks for being so great & stickin’ with me so long ;; here’s to many more years of friendship ♥♥♥♥

Do i;

RP with them: i just need to bully my ass into logging back onto my multi ,,, or literally any other blog that isn’t just jack ,,, bc differing canons can sometimes make plotting Difficult  ,,, but i always have a Mighty Desire to write w/ you, Want to RP with them:  Always tbh ;; me n’ fate got. like. the same Vibes. it’s so easy to build off your replies, fate, & just get into the depths of a thread. like. i’m so COMFORTABLE writing with you is what it is. it just comes EASY with you ;w;

What is my;

Overall Opinion:  it’s that you have truly given me meaningful, memorable experiences on this site, & you’ve become such a treasured friend & for that i Love U

[gotatext]

hullo everyone, i’m nora, i’m 22, from the gmt timezone, and i love gillian flynn w all my withered heart. below the cut is info on my latest baby frida parrish. LIKE THIS and i’ll hit u up for plots xo

       ( kristine froseth, cis-female ) did you hear how FRIDA PARRISH is applying to columbia university as a CLASSICAL CIVILISATION major ?! the 20 year old is living in the WALLACH HALL. i heard that they got in because they are + MAGNETIC and + TENACIOUS, but honestly i think SHE can be -DOUBLE-CROSSING and -FANCIFUL. they’re a real SYRABITE. oh well, only time will tell if the SOPHOMORE will make it til the end.   + a bubble of pink gum on chapped lips, pouring over leather-bound volumes in a library, bloodstains on the insoles of pointe shoes.

BACKGROUND.

—  born in vermont and lived there til she was about eleven, but then her family moved to new york for her dad’s job. her dad is kind of famous. a big shot art dealer. he actually got so well connected in the art world by creating forgeries of famous works when frida was still really young, but once he had enough money and contacts, he decided to follow a more legal and reputable path and now he just deals legit art rather than fakes. —  her parents, mara dagney and richard parrish met doing a fine art cause at nyu. richard was raised in the uk, one of three cambridge-born brothers. mara grew up on a ranch in new mexico. they met in freshers week and were basically inseparable after that. —  pretty soon after graduating, her parents realised there was very little money to be made taking art commissions in a little new england town, and plenty of competition, so they began forging famous works and selling them to collectors for thousands.  —  when frida was a born (her brother two years her senior, a nuclear family), her parents were still involved in forgery. the parrish kids were taught that people and places were temporary with suitcases permanently packed for the move. they were raised on the fluidity of identity and taught to be resourceful and wise rather than school-smart. phillip was never as resourceful as frida, but he was incredibly learned when it came to literacy and numeracy, and a bit of an art prodigy. —  when frida (affectionately referred to as ‘fox’ by her family because of her auburn hair ��� it stuck) was nine and phillip (’pippin’, after the broadway musical lmao her mum is lame) was twelve, the family ran into some trouble, managed to bribe an officer to stay quiet, but had to move from burlingdon to new york, to start a new, legal life. —  mara retrained as a grade school teacher. richard opened up his own arts collective space and coffee shop. within a few years, her father had a really large collection of rothko’s, pollock’s and johns’, and began to appear on a tv show where he would value and auction paintings. frida and phillip attended a public new york day school, where frida took up flute, lacrosse and ballet.

PERSONALITY.

— both her parents had Large Personalities, so frida’s never really been shy around adults, even as a kid she’d speak to them in a forthright, confident manner, and because she was always surrounded by adults, she’s always seemed a bit Wise Beyond Her Years. — very much a consolidation of every character in the secret history. has a morbid longing for the picturesque at all costs. obsessed with w.h. auden and the beat poets. — ”aestheticism is the only thing worth pursuing and even that is pointless”  — is majoring in classical civilisation. can read ancient greek and latin. also speaks french. — studies hard and plays hard. she gets top marks but it’s because academia is literally her life, she loves the smell of libraries, the ancient smoke of learning, of feeling like old wine in a new bottle reincarnated from the bones of some old, dead witchy woman who invented a cure for cowpox or somethin. — isn’t a foward-planner, however. frida prefers to leave her options open, play the field, live in a spontaneous manner so her study style is mostly cramming a few days before a test, or staying up all night writing an essay on a massive adrenaline boost powered by red bull or probably adderall, scribbling (or typing) furiously into the night. — pretentious motherfucker. LOVES poetry, especially the romantics, loves morbid ones too, edgar allen poe, sylvia plath, allen ginsberg, she just loves them all. can’t get enough. her favourite films are like…. wanky artfilm independent european cinema. especially french new wave. “what do you think of goddard’s work??” while snorting a line off someone’s sink at 5am on a school night, but you can bet she’ll make it to that 9am class. — very Intelligent and Beautiful and knows both of those facts. vocal feminist. soapbox sadie. Very Passionate about Issues. plays devil’s advocate. humanitarian, vegan. — judgemental but takes great care not to appear so. — just wants to be Loved By All. a party girl ; doesn’t rlly enjoy it, jst feels she Should enjoy it. — tries to be an Enigma. wants to be mysterious and unreadable because that’s what books have taught her makes women Desirable and Interesting and Cool. — obsessively devours mystery and thriller novels. she herself is a gillian flynn book waiting to happen. — act like the flower but be the serpent under it. is a user. manipulative. leads people on. will throw another student under the bus to demonstrate her own intelligence and integrity — heavily involved in the theatre society. loves attention. — has an addictive personality. seems unable to do anything in a small dose, she has to let it utterly consume her. with sports, she’s fiercely competitive, runs track, played lacrosse at school, now is a cheerleader probably. with alcohol, it’s never a shot, it’s a whole bottle – wine or whiskey – she’ll be table dancing before the night’s up and making out with someone she’ll regret in the morning.  — her clothing style is like…. vintage thrift store but make it preppy. berets and cute hats, neck scarves, large fluffy cardigans or like those leathery jackets with big suede fringes on them, mini skirts (very 70s), and knee high socks or boots. quite often she’ll be in sports kit, maybe a cute tennis skirt, n when she’s feeling casual she’ll wear like, a talking heads tshirt with a pair of mom jeans and converse, but otherwise, the library is her catwalk. — relates to ophelia from hamlet and sibyl vane in dorian gray. weirdly obsessed with women who commit suicide. loves jackson pollock paintings and abstract art. – likes old things. old books, old music, old houses, it reminds her of happier times like when she wasn’t alive. buys all her music on vinyl and has a gramphone because “The Sound quality is Better” kfdsjj. 

anyway, here you will find a pinterest board, and here u will find a stats page.

PLOTS.

here are some generic wanted plots but by all means message me so we can flesh them out more if any strike ur interest:

study buddies !! someone who is equally unprepared and so spends all night in the library with frida before a big deadline, maybe they even met in the library

if they’re from new england or vermont, then cousins . second cousins / extended family / family friends –  probably spat volavons on your character once as children, omg childhood friends !

people who live on the same floor and only know each other from brief interactions in the lift or the canteen

frinds !! unlikely friends !! toxic friends !! former best friends separated by sporting or academic rivalries ! 

hockey / cheer friends who are on other teams but who she absolutely loves playin against!!! 

fellow academics who like meeting up to discuss latin and greek ! gimme a secret society bonding by their love of ancient learning

i reckon she’s in a lot of societies, definitely the film club, maybe works as a projectionist at the uni cinema if they have one so give me ppl affiliated with that, give me fellow wanky pretentious art-lovers and poets and historians who will go to museums and galleries with her and listen to the velvet underground on vinyl

people she gets mortally fucked off her tits with at parties

people who think she is throwing her academic potential away by caving to hedonistic impulse

people she has drunkenly made out with, hooked up with, or regularly sleeps with casually, maybe even a friend w benefits she is repressing feelings for, i love angst, 

people she used to date or unrequitedly likes, but to them it’s just a physical thing, give me all the thirsty angst plots, and maybe some softness too, i need some religion in this girls life, she is a roman catholic after all

thats all for now folks jeez louise thanks for stickin with me

[opera-ghost]

tag game!

rules: answer the questions and tag 20 people you want to know better!

i normally don’t participate in tag games but i’m procrastinating rn so why not 🤷

Name: morgan

Nickname: i have a lot but my favorites are probably morguini or moregano (thanks august <3)

height: like 5′7″-ish last time i checked

Nationality: american

Favorite Fruit: idk man... like bananas or something

Favorite Season: the second season of jessica jones,,, haha jk probably spring

Favorite Plant: those weird tropical flowers with the yellow thingy stickin out of them

Favorite Scent: this one girl in my second period has this really good perfume stuff and every once in a while she’ll spray it and my senses ascend to heaven

Favorite Color: green or blue

Favorite Animals: bunnies

Coffee, Tea, or Hot Chocolate: i drink iced coffee when i’m tired (which is like all the time lmao) and i like hot chocolate when it’s cold 

average sleep hours: waaaay too little. it varies a lot which probably isn’t good but i normally get 6 hours at best

Dog or Cat person: i’m mildly allergic to both but i guess dogs?

Favorite Fictional Characters: any character played by jeff goldblum is pretty high up on the list

Number of blankets you sleep With: only one but it’s really thick

Dream Trip: paris or new york

Blog Created: i put this in my about page on my blog because i’m extra, but i created this thing on june 15th of last year

Number of followers: currently sitting at 1,309 but like five are active lmao

Random Fact: i have a test tomorrow and it’s already eleven at night and i wake up at six and i just k n o w i’m gonna be too tired to function but it’s,,, ok

idk i guess i’ll tag you lauren @misfitpeach and uhhhh sorry if you guys got tagged already just ignore this @thecommunityoftrustworthysinks @your-obedient-phantom @dodgisshipper

[stuffandsundry]

Alt. P5 Justice Confidant

okay. okayokayokay IM GOOD, IM READY THIS TIME, I HAVE NOTES, BUCKLE IN OUT ALL AROUND YALL.

so a weekish ago i made this vaguely incoherent post about how Goro Akechi’s confidant could be improved, and I’m back now, armed with coffee and a slightly more coherent statement. Spoilers under the cut.

(I haven’t fact-checked everything here, so if I get something wrong, sorry. I just don’t feel like going through 100+ hours of footage for what’s essentially a vent post, haha. Aight lets get into it)

First things first: I don’t actually hate Goro Akechi-- I kinda neutralish like him, tbh. I am, however, in a constant state of seething rage about how grossly mishandled his whole everything is. Conceptually, I think he’s an interesting character, and a good foil to the Phantom Thieves.... as a whole. And that. That right there? Is one of my problems with Akechi. By setting him up as a foil to the protagonist alone, they weaken his characterization.

The thing about Persona protags in general is that by and large, they’re mostly silent observers up to a point within their own stories. You can project your own headcanons onto them as much as you like-- heavens know that I’ve seen dozens of Yus or Soujis or Minatos floating around. Some are heavily based in canon, some are just what the fans thought was cool, and that’s great! Creativity rocks! But... Akechi’s entire deal-- the way that he reacted to gaining a Persona and access to the Metaverse? It’s intrinsically tied into his backstory, which P5 Protag by necessity has the bare minimum of.

You can argue that Goro and Protag are both victims of a corrupt system, and that as foils it shows how working within the system doesn’t work and sometimes you just need to go “fuck youuuu”, but listen, if that’s the criteria, P5 Protag is a better foil for Goro’s mom. Made one mistake that ruined their life and branded tham a pariah, we don’t know much about their life beforehand, tried to keep their head down and deal. And while Protag eventually rebelled, and found compatriots in that rebellion, Goro’s mother didn’t, and stayed alone, and died. Essentially, what I’m trying to say is that sure, Protag and Akechi both victims. But the injustices perpetrated against Akechi and Protag are different.

Which isn’t a huge problem. It could still work-- it does, up to a point.

But.

The rest of the Phantom Thieves are right there. You want foils? Literally half of the roster of the Phantom Thieves would make great foils!!!

Ann-- both think that it’s better for an abuser to live and suffer the consequences rather than escape into death. And depending on how exactly Goro feels about his mother, fighting because of revenge, too.

Ryuji-- relationship with fame, mom: ryuji has a loving mother, desires recognition for efforts as part of the Thieves, Akechi has the adoration of the masses, but he’ll never get his parents’ approval

Makoto-- wanting Sae’s approval vs having Sae’s approval but being indifferent towards it, both methodical, logic-minded, and good at school/hard workers, but impulsive at times as well.

Futaba-- on the record, both lost their mothers to suicide, supposedly because they couldn’t stand the shame of having had a child out of wedlock (though this isn’t at all true for Wakaba). The hecked up irony of Akechi taking away what Futaba had and making her just like him.

Yusuke-- I can’t come up with anything truly substantial off the top of my head, but there’s potential for Yusuke knowing that something was up with Madarame and choosing to not believe it vs Goro knowing that Shido was a shithead from the beginning and jumping in anyways

Haru-- maybe something to do with how she found out about the Metaverse and immediately tried to do something about her father using it, same as Goro probably did.

The point is, there’s a better way to characterize Goro, and that’s to have him interact more with your teammates, not by having the focus be on his interactions with the Protag. Because we know why our teammates react to things the way that they do. And by having Goro talk to them, we can get better characterization by observing the way that he plays off them, rather than having “Akechi walks over and monologues at me sometimes, and I understand him better because of that (no i don’t)”. Which brings me to another point, actually. Teammate interaction means that conversations with Akechi are far less one-sided than they are in the majority of interactions Protag has with him. Again-- the protagonist is mostly passive because he’s a partial player insert, and I totally get that. But the way that you’re only really given short dialogue options, while Akechi is clearly trying to get some sort of reaction from you (im pretty sure he believes that you and the gang are the PT as early as his Rank 2) gives me a really strong impression of “oh god it’s this guy again please go away”, which I’m sure isn’t the writer’s intention. But still. I Don’t Like It.

There are very few mostly-innocuous things that get my hackles up faster than feeling like I’m beholden to listen to somebody talk. The other two automatic confidants don’t do this to me because they’re very clearly story-related from the beginning, I know they’re going to happen, I have a general idea of how it’s going to go. Akechi just comes out of nowhere and tries to get a reaction out of me like he’s the heckin Spanish Inquisition. Do you know how much it sucks to have some person decide that you’re their friend (or fated rival or w/e), and that that gives them the right to approach you out of nowhere to vent or prod at you to see how you’ll react, and you can’t tell them hey, maybe don’t? Because that’s how I feel about his confidant. Listen, at least if you don’t like Ryuji or Kawakami or Makoto any other confidant, you aren’t obligated to progress them.

So how do you fix this? There’s two options that I favor:

You don’t make his confidant automatic, or

You make his confidant Goro Akechi vs. The Phantom Thieves instead of just Goro

I want to talk about the second option. Let Protag’s teammates carry the conversation! Akechi espouses a kind of Justice that members of the PT can’t agree with, to varying degrees. Some members may understand where he’s coming from more than others (say, Makoto or Ryuji, respectively) but the members of the PT were in circumstances such that if the Phantom Thieves had not existed, the corrupted system could not have resolved their personal injustices. And there’s something interesting to be found in this clash of ideaology! It would help to characterize both Akechi and your teammates!!

It wouldn’t even be that hard to change-- out of his 10 confidants, something like 6 or 7 of them are already group scenes! Just... just have him talk more with your teammates instead of hyperfixiating on you! That’s it! That’s all you needed to do!

Giving your teammates more interaction with Akechi also makes their abrupt change of opinion of him less (???) too! Because it implies that they were forced to re-evaluate all their previous interactions with him based on the information that he gives before and during his boss battle-- have one of them make a reference to that, afterwards. Like Haru’s ‘I understand where you’re coming from now, but also I still can’t forgive you’, but with more background behind it. Akechi making cryptic remarks about bad parents in the past and Ryuji or Yusuke or Futaba going “ah. i can understand you better now” after the battle.

Augh.

Anyways. Thanks for stickin with me until the end of this friggin monster. I.... should go do actual work now, bye.

[ramabear]

maybe... set to backburner until siaod is complete? (love siaod and discovered you back with the naruto au period, you're an incredible author)

i mean,,,, my narts au folders are at this point three buckets deep,,, whats likely to happen is i’ll spend a lot of time like,, thinking abt it (aka daytime driving daydreams anyone?)  and talking abt it with taavs and outlining things and half heartedly writing out scenes w/ the kids and their sensei n whatnot

might make some vague posts n all that

after SIAOD is done my plan is to go thru and finish up the smaller pieces that i can manage to bang out,,,, then i’ll see where my headspace is at you know? 

(thanks for stickin w/ me thru the bnha period after findin me with narts. i’ll go back to it some day, im sure) (speakin of which, brotherhood isn’t forgotten either... i got plans to go back to that for sure)