#steve then proceed to cry on tonys shoulder

[fancyhandsbakery]

I think a core memory of mine was when I was 13 and reading a Marvel fic. The tags and the description had me thinking, 'Tony looks at Steve's sketch book and realizes Steve is gay.' Great premise, right. Wrong. That is not what happened because the drawing was of a little girl, and Steve was a pedophile.

[callmissrogers]

There For His Girl | Steve Rogers x Reader One Short

Summary: Y/n has reached her limit. Work has been difficult. People have been short, and some just mean. It all brings her back to her childhood, and right now, she just wants to pretend to be ok. So determined to pretend she tries to push her concerned husband away.

WARNINGS ⚠️ This contains mentions of a toxic relationship with the reader's mother and quotes some of their arguments. If this is a trigger for you, please DO NOT proceed. It also contains angst, fluff, and comfort. Also, very little editing and wrote on my phone.

Steve Rogers x wife reader

Word count: 1,370

Notes: The next part in the That's My Girl series will be going up today or tomorrow. I was feeling the need for some comfort myself, so this is what I wrote. Hope you like it!

Y/n slammed the door, tears streaming down her face she pressed her back into the wall and slid down until she was a small ball on the floor.

"Why do I do this?" She sobbed hating herself.

Y/n had had a rough few days. It seemed like no matter what she did or said, people were short with her. Everything was going wrong, and after one mistake, which led to a snarky backhanded compliment from Tony Stark himself, well, Y/n was done. Usually, it didn't get to her like this anymore, but her emotions frayed to a breaking point.

Her dad always told her she wore her heart on her sleeve but she just thought her mom was right and that instead of enduring this made her a nuisance.

Why should she be so bothered when people utter unkind things to her?

Why can't she pull herself together?

"You're always start crying! Stop trying to make me feel bad"

"You're stabbing me in the back by trying to do something different"

"Don't you know I need you here? Stop thinking about yourself and making everything harder on me"

This and many other instances where y/n would be belittled, ridiculed, screamed at, lectured for two hours at 1 in the morning, and reduced to making herself as small and as unseen as possible while being a sobbing mess, had made her what she is today.

Too sensitive. At least that's what she told herself at times like this.

And why couldn't she just talk about it like a normal person instead of blowing something trivial out of proportion?

Literally five minutes ago....

Steve had come home the night before. Poor guy had been so tired that he fell asleep in uniform on the couch.

Y/n had been carefully tiptoeing around the kitchen so as not to accidentally wake him up. Intending to surprise him before heading to work.

She was supposed to be going over mission plans with Vision today. This was the kind of work that excited her. None of the agents would bother them while they were working, which meant that she could just disappear for the day.

She platted up breakfast and carried it over to set it on the coffee table in front of the sleep soilder.

Tho he didn't actually wake up until she set down his mug of coffee.

Eyes fluttering open he peered up at her groggyily. "Hi" He mumbled, pushing himself upright. "Hey sleepy head." Y/n said, trying to make her voice sound chipper.

Steve sighed contentedly as he stretched out his muscles before standing up.

"Mind if I go change clothes before I enjoy this masterpiece?" He asked. Y/n turned to face him, attempting to smooth down his wild bedhead and then said, "Go ahead"

He was back a matter of moments, settling down next to her and drinking deeply from his coffee.

"Thank you for this," He sighed leaning over and gently kissing her on the cheek. Y/n just nodded, trying to keep her mind on a healthy track she focused on eating.

"Did you sleep well?" Steve asked. Taking another bite, she thought about lying and telling him that she had had the best night sleep.

"Sorta" She said trying to stiffle a yawn. "What does sorta mean?" Steve asked turning to look at her. "Nothing really. I'm good! Nothing some strong coffee won't fix."

Steve placed his hands on her shoulders, making her look at him. He studied the dark circles, the faint tint of bloodshot in her eyes, how she held herself and her fiddling hands.

"Hm," He said, his voice low in his chest.

Y/n knew exactly what he was doing, shaking his hands off her shoulders and standing up she said, "I should probably get ready for work."

Steve stood up, grabbing her wrist and stopping her. "Y/n, you look exhausted." "I'm fine" "You're twirling your hair, which means you're not telling the truth." "Steve, c'mon I don't have time for this" "Y/n, it looks like you've been crying" She pulled his hand off her wrist and started to walk away from him, "I'm going to work." "Sweetheart, please just tell me what's - " "Steve! Please just listen to me and leave me alone!" She yelled, cutting him off. She ran off to the bedroom, and that's when the door slammed.

Steve stood there a moment, thinking about honoring her request and leaving her be. But his protective nature overtook him and he decided that the best thing to do would be to be there for his girl.

In the bedroom.

Y/n sat against the wall still crying into her hands, body trembling, thinking hateful thoughts about herself.

She heard Steve knock on the door, saying "Sweetheart, can I come in?"

When she didn't answer him, he slowly opened the door and stepped inside.

She could feel him kneeling down in front of her, "Sweetheart," He whispered, trying to tuck her hair behind her ear to which she only buried her face further.

The next thing that happened, was Steve scooping her up into his arms and settling down in the arm chair that sat in the room.

Somehow this just made her cry more.

"Oh honey, come on now. Take a deep breath. In through the nose and out through the mouth." He soothed.

After about ten minutes of this, her crying settled down, breath becoming rhythmic.

Once he was sure that she had calmed down enough to be able to communicate with him, he asked his voice low and rumbling through his chest, "Do you wanna talk about what's going on in that pretty little head of yours?"

She nodded against his shirt. "Everything" she gasped. "Everything?" He asked, pulling her back so he could look her in the face. Dabbing away the leftover tears.

"I'm too emotional. Everything the last few days just hurts. I let everything get under my skin... I just. . Lately, people and Stark are just mean, or maybe I'm just too sensitive.. and now I've yelled at you, too." She said, trying to get up.

"Now hold on a minute, " He cooed, keeping her in place.

"What did Tony say?" "Nothing. I messed up and he was being sarcastic, but I'm such a mess that it hurt" she said her voice breaking. "Alright. Listen to me. One, you are not too emotional. The world tells everyone to button up and be cynical. You, my dear, are a light in all that mess. You do care and that's a very good thing -- I don't want you to listen to anyone that would belittle that, ok?" He asked getting a slow, uncertain nod in response. "Ok. Secondly, people can be mean, especially Stark. People also have power trips and want to pull people down to make themselves feel stronger or better. This means there's one thing you can always be certain of: Do you know what that is?" "What?" "They're wrong. Anyone who would belittle you to make a point or to win an argument or for any other reason, is just a bully." "But what if-" "ah. No what ifs. Thirdly, and this one is the one that's most important of the three." "Then why'd it come last?" She asked clearly beginning to feel a little bit better if she could tease him now. Steve simply rolled his eyes and continued,

"I want you to remember that when you're upset, you can always talk to me. No matter how silly it might make you feel, your feelings are safe with me." "Steve I just yelled at you for no rea-" "No. You had a reason. You were upset. I can see that and you know what that means? It means I can take it too. When I put this ring on your finger," He said taking her hand in his and running a finger across her knuckles. "I signed up for this. I'd rather have you get emotional than bottle things up and hide them from me."

Y/n looked down at their still intertwined hands and then back up at him. Nodding again and breathed out an "ok"

"Ok." Steve replied, giving her his usual comforting smile and kissing her forehead.

[imawreck]

Loop

Pairing: Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier x Original Character

Summary: Max is pushed to the brink of survival in order to break her spirit. Giles proceeds with his plans for her as the main weapon for New Hydra.

Warnings: gore, death, mental torture, starvation and physical abuse, cursing, lots of bad stuff so read with caution!

Author’s Note: Well, if you read the last chapter, you know it’s gonna be terrible awful. Buckle up and grab the tissues home-slices, you’re in for a rollercoaster ride.

Word count: 4,203

Max-

I woke with a start, hands thrashing about and getting caught in sheets. I stumbled off the edge of a bed, mind wild as I took in my surroundings.

Sheets, a bed, no cell in sight.

Confusion crept into my mind as I recalled where I had been mere minutes ago. I swore I had been in a cell, trapped within Hydra's compound just minutes ago...

But everything seemed so real. The coolness of the tile beneath my bare feet, the scent of laundry detergent clinging to the bedsheets that spilled out onto the floor next to me, even the heartbeat down the hall—

A heartbeat down the hall.

I scrambled up from the tiles, bolting for the door and shoving it open. Blinding white light met my eyes, stealing my vision for a moment as I blinked it away in a hurry. Someone stood at the end of the hall, wide eyed and looking nearly as confused as I felt.

"Max?" His voice was like heaven upon my ears, and I felt my eyes sting as I took in his lovely face.

Those same steely blue eyes held me captive with their worried gaze. A T-shirt and jeans graced his body, and his white socks stuck out against the dark floors. He kept walking towards me as I fought to find words, to speak to him.

"Doll, what's wrong? You're scarin' me."

Doll. That single word was my undoing. I ran to him, wrapping my arms around his waist and clinging to him with a sob, "Bucky." His heart thundered in my ear as his arms wrapped themselves around me.

His voice rumbled, "Hey, what's going on? Do-gk."

Glass shattered behind me, tearing my attention to the windows of the small living room. One of the windows were broken, and the red laser of a sniper flickered off from the building next to the Tower.

I tore my eyes from the window as one of Bucky's hands left my hip. I felt something warm drip onto my face, taking my attention back towards Bucky only to be blinded by whatever it was dripping onto my face. I swiped at it with the back of my hand, blinking it away and bringing my hands down to look at them.

They were red. Red as blood.

Bucky stumbled to the side, slamming to his knees on the tiles and clutching at his neck. His breathing was garbled and wet, all the wrong sounds. I collapsed next to him, grasping at his shirt, his shoulders, anything I could get purchase on as he fell to the floor. His blue eyes were wild and scared, searching mine for answers.

"Bucky, no, no, no!" A sob wracked through me, "Tony! STEVE! Somebody, anybody!" I pulled him into my arms, pressing my hand against his own to stifle the bleeding. "Help me!"

Nobody came, no one was coming. There was only the dulling sound of his heartbeat and the splatter of blood on the tiles that met my ears. We were alone, and there was nothing I could do to stop this.

It couldn't be real, surely it wasn't real.

But it felt real. The heat of his skin, the pain in his eyes—

Bucky didn't blink. He... He wasn't blinking, wasn't breathing. A strangled cry left me as I pressed my hand harder to his still bleeding neck, tried and failed to call out to him through my tears. He wasn't waking up.

I slumped to the floor beside him, feeling my heart shatter at the sight of his lifeless eyes. My forehead dropped to his chest as I gasped for air and gripped at his shirt. It felt like I sat there for hours over his fallen body. No one ever came.

I felt something shift, felt my mind wane, and suddenly his body was gone. I straightened up, tears still pooling in my eyes and the tiles steady under my feet. The lights still shone brightly, and when I turned around the window that had been broken was miraculously repaired. I sniffled, swiping my arm across my face. The blood that had coated my hands was gone, as was the puddle on the floor.

Moments later, the elevator tolled and out he strode again as healthy and whole as he had been before. I balked at him, but he just frowned and shot me a confused little smile.

"What're you lookin' at me like that for?" His hands were in his jean pockets and the metal glint of his arm was on full display in that T-shirt like it was before.

I hesitated, eyes flittering over to the window before I pushed up from the floor and tugged him into my room. I clicked the door shut, sliding the deadbolt into place behind me before whirling around to face him. His body stood stalk still, eyes wide as they took me in.

I blinked at him, looking down at myself too. I felt the change, the leather against my skin. The cold metal of a knife clutched in my fingers. The mask pressed against my face and dimmed my vision as I peered at him through the eyes of it. Bucky backed away with his arms held up as if he were trying to get an animal to calm.

I wanted to tell him I wasn't going to hurt him, that I didn't understand what was happening, but my mouth wouldn't move. The knife in my hand caught the light as I swung it, watching it sail through the air and plant itself in the wall beside his head. Bucky had moved just in time to avoid it, but he couldn't move in enough time to avoid the second that planted itself in his thigh.

I wanted to scream, to stop my body from its assault on him. It was like I was trapped in my own body watching as someone else called the shots. Perhaps that was how he felt once. I wondered if he would understand when I succeeded, if he would forgive me.

I drowned out the noise of his screaming with the pounding of my heart. I didn't want to listen. The third and final blade found its home in his heart, my traitorous hand twisting it swiftly to the side until his body stopped moving. Till his hands stopped gripping my arms.

I sat there on the floor with his body, staring at his empty eyes, until the door creaked open again.

"Doll?"

_____

Tony-

I've had my fair share of all-nighters. In fact, nearly every night was an all-nighter for me. I had lots of things to do and such a short amount of time to do them. But now that Max was gone, my nights had begun melding together into one continuous 72-hour day with the occasional nap here and there.

Pepper, bless her, had dragged my half-awake body away from my main computer and scolded me for not sleeping properly. She reminded me I can't get any work done without rest, not anything helpful anyways. So, I had slept restlessly most nights since then. I tried and failed to shut off my brain. I was too worried about missing something, any little detail to tell us where we might find her.

It was a real surprise when Friday notified me that there had been a major power surge smack dab in the center of Germany, the motherland itself.

I had been on my way to retrieve a second refill of coffee when she had told me as much. I fumbled my mug, completely forgetting it on the counter and taking the quickest route to my labs. I had her pull up the data, map it out for me to examine, then called in Vision who had returned recently from his mission.

He had taken into account what had happened and deduced that it was in fact the scepter that had released that kind of surge. As I feared, they had gotten their hands on it. I thanked him, sending him away before I called in Steve.

"They have the scepter, and they're using it for something." I watched him carefully, "I haven't had the opportunity to contact Thor and ask him exactly what this thing does, but I doubt it's good."

Steve nodded, "Why would they use it if they knew that it would tell us where they were? It just doesn't make any sense." He pressed his palm against his forehead as he stared at the blip on the display. "Does he know?"

I pursed my lips, shaking my head. "No, I've only told you and Vision. I wasn't sure how he would react since he's been acting... removed."

In all honestly, I was afraid Bucky would pack up and go directly there without our knowledge. There would be no stopping him if he wanted to. I don't even think Steve could stop him at this point. It had been five weeks since Max had gone missing, and in that time, Bucky had dedicated every minute of free time in the training room. Everyone could tell that her kidnapping had taken a tremendous toll on his mental health. I felt like telling him something so important would be the tipping point that sent him into action.

Steve sighed, pressing his hands against the countertop. "He deserves to know. We just have to deliver the news gently. The team needs to be informed and updated, any edge we can get on them is crucial." He pushed off from the counter and folded his arms across his chest. "What are we going to do?"

The billion-dollar question. "I say we storm it. Sweep in with the jet, scope it out, and take it out like every other mission. It could be a mistake on their part. It could also be a trap." I frowned, "But Max is over there going through hell and there's a limited window of time for us to use this before it's too late."

Steve nodded, "We have to be careful. We're going to need every surprise we have."

"Friday?" I swallowed the lump in my throat.

"Yes boss?"

"Call the team in."

_____

Max-

I had lost all sense of time.

Reality was but a dream, a nightmare, I was unsure I would wake from. Every flutter of my eyelids took me in and out of different pains. My mind was muddled and tired, unable to discern the difference between the hellish plains of my imagination and the solid world that yanked me from it. Even then, the world I returned to was violent and agonizing.

There were flickers between my pain where there was just stillness. I could hear my breathing in my ears, feel something cold against my chest cooling me through the thin hospital gown I knew still hung from my shoulders. Someone smiled, a man I couldn't recognize through the haze, but the image made my blood chill and my body involuntarily recoil.

But the pain was a constant squeezing, burning thing that consumed me. The type that shattered your mind and separated you from your body. Melted you away until you're nothing more than a shell of what you were before. My heart was bleeding, I could feel it in my chest. It was hollow and broken.

I had watched Bucky die so many times. Tried and tried and tried to stop it. I never could. It felt so real every time he smiled at me, wrapped me in his warmth and littered kisses on my skin. But then he was bleeding or screaming in an instant. Every time was different. I never knew how to stop it, and no one came to help. I could feel his blood slip between my fingers, warm and wet as it slicked the floor beneath me. I watched each time as his heart stopped and the life drained from his eyes.

I no longer knew where I was or when I was, who I was when I blinked once more, and Bucky's fallen body disappeared like it always seemed to do. Everything was cold and dull, the metal that chilled my cheek where I laid sprawled out in the cramped cell. I was gasping for breath, my throat raw from screaming. I no longer had a voice.

"Hello again." My eyes tried their best to focus on the man crouched in front of the cell, the dull blue glow from the scepter he clutched in his hand made me flinch. "What did you experience?"

I couldn't tell him even if I wanted to. The images of what I had witnessed made my throat go dry and my heart spasm in fear. I clutched at the fabric over my heart to try and calm it, but it was useless. The man didn't seem satisfied by that. Why couldn't I remember his name?

He stood slowly, eyes watching me as I flinched at his movements. "It must have been terrifying to break such a strong weapon. Look at what it has made you into. Groveling, pathetic little bird." He kept smiling as he said it. "Do you even know what day it is? Where you are?"

I didn't. Not anymore.

My silence must have been answer enough. "Do you remember why you're here?"

Slowly, images flashed in my mind, and I spoke as it came to me. "I got away." My voice was like grinding stones. "You nearly killed me to get me back." I could feel my head clear a bit.

The man, Giles—Yes, his name was Giles, Roman Giles—stepped away from the cell and set the scepter in a black case a few steps away. "Your Soldier will be coming for you. They will have detected such strong power by now."

Bucky, he was talking about Bucky. My voice wrenched from my throat before I could stop it. If he was alive- "Don't hurt him. Please, I'll do anything, just don't hurt him. I can't watch it again."

I knew I had said the wrong thing the moment he spun around, and that wretched smile had doubled in size. "Can't watch it again? Is that what it showed you? Is that what you fear most in this world? How touching, truly."

One of his hands sunk into the pocket of his lab coat and retrieved a small black device. I watched his thumb flick a button against the side before he crouched before me once more. I didn't even possess the energy to move away from him. "Tell me what you'll do to keep us from getting him."

I could feel a sob gathering in my chest as my eyes burned at the memories sweeping in some torturous slideshow behind them. "I'll do anything, just don't hurt him. I'll kill if that's what you want. I'll become whatever you want me to be, just don't touch him. Leave him alone." That traitorous sob forced itself through my teeth, cleaving the silence. "I can't watch him die again, not anymore. I- I can't."

Giles lifted the little box up to his face. "Did you hear that, Sargent Barnes? Isn't she sweet? Sacrificing herself to save you." He laughed, the sound enough to have me shoving back against the cage. "The next time you see her she will be but a husk of the woman you knew. Chow!" His thumb switched off the box and he pocketed it back into his coat.

The door was swung open, the scrape of metal against the floor sent a sharp pain through my head. "The rest of the base has been loaded up sir. We are ready to move the Asset."

I locked eyes with him, doing my best to pull a vicious curl onto my lips. Giles nodded to him, "Then move it. We don't have a lot of time before they pick up on the scepter if they haven't already. Time is of the essence." With that, he slipped out the door and four men replaced him.

All of which held those awful tranq guns.

_____

Bucky-

When Tony called a meeting in the middle of the night, I knew we had to have gotten some sort of intel on Max. I was terrified to have hope, but I could feel it blooming in my chest despite my efforts to stop it. The cool metal of the chair I had claimed at the table seeped into every part of me, chilling my very bones. The team trickled in slowly, too slowly for my liking, but it was in the mere early hours of the morning, and they all had more than likely been sleeping. The only person who looked remotely awake was Tony. Even Steve looked haggard.

"Thank you for coming," Tony started, "I have some news on Max."

That got everyone in the room sitting up.

With a long breath, Tony continued. "There was a large scale burst of power located in the middle of Germany. I consulted with Vision and Cap, and we've come to the conclusion that the only thing that could release that magnitude of power that we know of, is the scepter."

Wanda flinched at the mention of it, drawing my attention. Vision placed a comforting hand on her shoulder and my heart stung a little. Max had done the same for me many times before.

From beside me, Steve began explaining. "We will be mobilizing as soon as possible. There is a limited window of opportunity, and we all know that Giles is intelligent. He will know that we pick up on the surge and he's moving Max if he's as smart as we think. We need all of you on top of it, no mistakes." There was a beat of silence as we all took in his words before he spoke again, "We will discuss the details on the jet, suit up."

I was out of my chair as soon as he finished, marching to the elevator and taking it down to the landing bay where I began to yank on my uniform. I wasn't moving fast enough, nothing was. We had an opportunity to get Max back, and it was shrinking with every second it took for the team and myself to get around. I was the first in the jet, turning on the switches and taking the pilot seat.

Every nerve in my body was itching to take off, leave the rest of them behind and go after her myself. I would be faster, quieter, more effective without them.

But as Steve stepped onto the jet and clamped a hand on my shoulder like he always did when he knew something was bothering me, I knew I couldn't. Perhaps losing Max effected the team more than they let on, I thought, as they all hustled into the hanger minutes after I had. Every single one of them wore a face of determination. They all buckled in and gave me a thumbs up for takeoff. I didn't hesitate, launching the jet from the pad and punching in the coordinates as Tony read them off.

There wasn't much else to do as I set the jet to autopilot and prayed that we would make it in time. I moved to join the rest in the back, taking in their pensive faces as we all moved to seats closer to Tony in order to hear the details of the plan that could possibly save Max.

_____

Max-

I woke up in the dark.

My skin was covered in gooseflesh, and the cold seeped into my very bones. A throbbing headache formed in the forefront of my head, and no amount of blinking or rubbing at my temples got rid of it. Much like before they had knocked me out, my body remained week. Pain shot through every inch of me whenever I braved even the slightest of movements. But I couldn't focus on that now, not if I wanted to have even the slightest opportunity of escape. I still had a sliver of hope, just enough to have me hauling myself into a sitting position.

I curled into myself, wrapping my arms around my knees and tugging them impossibly closer in order to trap any remanence of heat my body possessed. I blinked away the drowsiness still clouding my mind from my unwilling sleep, slowly but surely regaining my senses.

"I read somewhere that due to your lowered body temperature, you move slower in the cold. I found that it was recorded that you have a harder time keeping heat regulating through your body than the normal person when temperatures drop below fifty degrees. You can still withstand colder temperatures more than most, but it severely hinders your skills." My eyes snapped toward his voice, that wickedly egotistical tone he always spoke with grated against my remaining nerves.

Giles remained with his back facing me, away from the cage I still remained trapped in. He wore a turtleneck now, and what looked like a heavy pair of uniform pants along with his white lab coat. He was fiddling with something I couldn't see, but the tilting of his shoulders and his focused air told me it was something that required his full attention.

That didn't stop him from talking to me over his shoulder.

"Don't worry though, you'll be let out soon enough." I turned to me then, a vial of something metallic swirling around clutched in his hand.

I recognized it almost immediately, remembered the way it had burned through my veins and threatened to steal my very mind from me. "Stay the fuck away from me or I'll splatter you up the walls!" I felt the panic welling in my belly, hot and wild and frantic.

Giles merely smiled that awful smile and took a step closer as if to test my threat. "Will you now? Perhaps we haven't broken that spirit as much as I thought we had. Would you like to go for round two? I have a few more bases we can move to before we really have to move things along. The scepter is just in the other chamber, won't be hard for me to get."

He blinked at me like the words that just poured from his mouth were anything but a threat against my life. Like he had just suggested the most normal thing in the world.

I couldn't help the curl of my lip, the flash of my teeth, like some primal instincts were kicking in and there was nothing I could do but force words through a body I wasn't entirely in control of. Fear had taken the front seat. "You're a sick bastard. I'll make every second of your death long and agonizing."

He merely sniffed, flicking the vial and reaching over to the table and picking up a syringe bullet. "I'm sure you will. That's only if you ever get out. Which you won't, by the way. Not in the way you're hoping anyways."

I watched as he clicked the vial into the bullet, securing it in place and reaching over again to the side and picking up a gun. "The only way you're getting out of here is if I want you to. And by then you'll be doing anything I want you to do. Especially if you want me to leave your little soldier boy alone. He's useless to me now that I have you, but that doesn't mean I won't put him down if you refuse to cooperate with me. Do you understand that, little bird?"

I grit my teeth, tightening my hold on my legs. Shivers were wracking my body now, and the room seemed to be continuously dropping in temperature. That, or my body just couldn't keep itself warm enough against the chill. Giles's eyes flickered up to mine as he waited for my reply, one I was very reluctant to give.

I rolled his words around in my head, letting them knock against the walls of my skull as I tried to find something else to say, to dredge up any last remnants of fight left in me. But there wasn't any left.

Not as the memories of watching Bucky die began to spill into my thoughts once again. The feeling of his blood slick on my hands wasn't something I could erase no matter how many times I scratched at my skin. Real or not, whatever that scepter had put me through was enough to snuff out any hope or fire left inside of me. I felt broken at the mere thought of him dying.

So, I nodded, agreed to do what I swore I would never do again.

I would become their monster, their puppet, once more.

I would let them ruin me, tear me apart over and over and over again. Let them muddle my mind if they wanted to. Obliterate every last memory I had, the only things I had for myself alone.

If that kept them from harming him again, if my downfall would promise his survival, then I would die on repeat for the rest of eternity.

Tags <3

@imdoingathingmom / @cjand10 / @greatenthusiasttidalwave / @hzdhrtss / @blackbirdwitch22 / @calwitch

[puppypeter]

Steve comes out of the ice and is pushed straight to fighting again. Yes he has a team around him but nobody really realises how little he has been touched since before he spent decades in the ice. Sure there is hand to hand combat or that brief second his hand touches someone else's when they're handing him something (he might have got a little bit teary eyed when he first went to Janine's diner for a cup of coffee and the old lady had patted him on the shoulder in a comforting gesture) but there's not been hugs or cuddles. 

For his birthday Tony gifts him a spa voucher to pamper himself - with the excuse that he needs someone to look out for his wrinkles considering he's such an old man.

He doesn't really know anything about beauty treatments, it was always soap and water for him growing up, not like he could afford to waste money even on a beauty cream (though he still remembers the lovely smell of a little pot of cream his ma had been gifted once). 

Despite the fact it sounds incredibly relaxing, he doesn't feel comfortable enough to book a full body massage so he opts for a facial cleans with a gentle massage, since the website says it will help with tired looking skin and something about cleansing the pores of the smog of a big city. He feels very out of place when he finally goes, but the receptionist is very polite and if she recognizes him, she does not act like it. He's asked to lay on the massage table face up, while the lights are dimmed and soft instrumental music starts playing in the background. His beauty therapist comes in and introduces himself as Bucky. He seems to be around Steve's age (well not his actual age) and is wearing his hair in a bun, a cute little braid on one side being held back by two colourful hair clips. He talks to him in a soft voice, explaining what the treatment is and what he's going to do step by step. When he finally starts by applying the facial scrub that help the exfoliating process of the skin, Steve takes in a big breath at the brush touching his face. It is on to steaming after that, Bucky's soft voice keeps talking to him, complimenting his skin, saying that there isn't really much to extract what with his super smooth baby skin (and ok maybe he doesn't need a facial thanks to the serum, but the internet did say something about pampering himself when he's feeling the way he's been feeling). Next, they move onto the face mask. It feels very much like jelly, but solidifies and gets removed like a sheet. Bucky applies a serum next, gently caressing his face. He keeps his eyes shut tightly the whole time, biting the inside of his cheeks, trying to contain all that he's feeling in his chest right there now. He just needs to hold on long enough to get back to his apartment in the tower. But Bucky is clearly an asshole because he proceeds with the last part of the treatment which is a face and neck massage. Though he's been touching his face this whole time, it is the gentleness with which he caresses Steve's eyebrows that crack him. He is really trying to hold everything in, but his body is literally shaking and Bucky can feel it in his hands that are now at the back of his neck, trying to massage the tension away. Tears start streaming down the side of his face as he bites his lip trying to contain in everything else. Bucky doesn't seem to be put off, he only asks to let him know if he'd like to stop. When the time is up, Bucky tells him he can lay there a bit longer enjoying the music and the calm, tells him he hopes he enjoyed the treatment and to see him again if he wishes to come back and then leaves the room. Steve wishes to curl up there and cry, but he's aware other people would see him come out a mess so he opts to make a quick exit so he can get home asap and just let it all out while hugging his pillow. The problem is, over the next two weeks, he doesn't seem to be able to stop thinking about Bucky and Bucky's gentle touch and his hands. He knows he was only doing his job but maybe he could go back again? Maybe this time for a massage? But what if he makes a fool of himself again? Sure, Bucky did not seem too bothered by it but still. He just feels a little bit pathetic to pay someone just to have some kind of physical contact (what if Bucky finds out and thinks Steve is creepy? It's not sexual at all for him, but what if that's how it comes across). He realizes it might be too soon still for a massage, so scrolling through the website he decides to book a manicure so that it will hopefully give him a chance to get to know Bucky a little bit since he will be able to talk to him a bit. Bucky smiles really big seeing him again, inviting him to seat on the velvety green chair across from him. Steve thought it would be weird, but Bucky seems great at chit chatting and mentions nothing at all about the last time. He does however point out how good Steve's skin is looking and makes him blush a lot when he admits he has been using the cream that Bucky suggested the last time. They talk about a lot of things, mainly Bucky-centric things because he doesn't want to pressure Steve. About how Bucky got into this line of work. About what he loves about it. How he wants other men to feel comfortable taking care of themselves and their bodies without judgement. He is so good that Steve leaves with a coat of nail polish - although a very very very light pink one. One step at a time. After that it's a pedicure - Bucky had highly recommended it after Steve joked about how much his feet live in combat boots. He had admitted to feeling weird about making his feet look pretty but Bucky had explained that a curative pedicure would help with the overall condition of his feet, looking after his skin, scrubbing and even a feet massage if Steve wasn't too ticklish. So Steve shows up with an iced coffee for Bucky the next time, as the brunette had mentioned how much he liked this indie coffee shop nearby. As they get to the massage part (and no, he is not ticklish) Bucky - now a bit more comfortable in their relationship - calls him out on suddenly looking all pensive. His eyes look tired and he just wants to go home, although there is no one there and he'd been having a nice time talking to Buck up until he started to really touch his skin and massage his ankles, it was fine when he was just twisting and turning his feet and talking about cuticles and soaking his feet once a week and other stuff. "I'm almost done, why don't we go grab a bite and maybe you can tell what's on your mind?" Bucky asks.

And it goes from there. With lots of tears and big feelings that Steve has been holding inside for too long. And he does end up getting a full body massage and crying through the whole thing. But by then there's been lots of hugs from Bucky, and they have smooched plenty too. So when he ends up sobbing face down on the massage table, Bucky can actually gently kiss the back of his neck and murmur sweet things in his ear. About how much he's loved, about how he's never gonna stop touching him. And he does keep his promise. When they go out they always sit side by side. On the bench, at the cinema, in the back of a cab, at the diner. So they can touch at all times, shoulders to feet. And even at the fancy restaurants where they are on opposite sides of the table, Bucky immediately starts playing footsie and holds Steve's hand on the table.

After some months of them dating Steve brings him to the tower for movie night and introduces him to the rest of the team. And they're all very surprised at how touchy feely they are as they'd never seen Steve that way before. Later in the night, when there's only a few people left in the lounge, it comes up in conversation. And everyone had apparently felt that Steve was very - reasonably - uncomfortable with touch, likely due to trauma and they did not want to cross boundaries and make him uncomfortable. There are lots of tears and sincere apologies on both sides and when he looks exhausted from being so vulnerable Bucky takes him to bed. He does his night time ritual of smooching him all over and then proceeds to grab the two colourful hair clips from his hair and pin Steve's hair back so he can apply the serum he had come up with specifically for Steve's skin type (Steve still giggles every time someone compliments his skin and he says 'oh yeah it's the serum' - Bucky's face just -.- but he also loves his dork). The morning after Steve is found in the kitchen figuring out how to make an iced coffee at home (thanks to Jarvis), face still full of pillow lines and messy hair with random colorful clips in them. Bucky wishes he could take a picture but he's too busy smothering him in hugs and kisses.

- the end - 

Also these were my tags but tumblr did not want to let me post with them sooo:

[yuulina-vre]

Strawberries

Masterlist // Main Masterlist

Chapter: three

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Daughter!Reader, Uncle Steve, Aunt Wanda

Summary: Y/N loves her favorite treat.

Wordcount: 2185 words

Y/N might be small but she’s fast if she wants to be and she knows it. Especially if strawberries are around, she doesn’t want to do something relating to bath times and yucky food or her daddy doesn’t pay much attention. Right now, two of these factors are the case. Her little eyes caught the bowl of her red favorite treats in Wanda’s hands a few minutes ago. It’s now resting on the island in the kitchen area. She can see but not reach, which is mean. Daddy had said she can’t have any now since she just had lunch but that won’t stop her from trying. The only problem that she has to face is that daddy’s still holding her on his lap and he doesn’t look like he’s going to set her down anytime soon since he’s too distracted talking to uncle Stevie and auntie Wanda. Okay… maybe she has two problems. She knows she won’t really be able to reach the berries if she manages to escape daddy’s lap since they’re so high up but she had noticed the chair at the counter, so maybe she will be fine. Uncle Tony always uses a chair for things high up. She can do that too, right? If daddy just will let her down! She wriggles a little on his lap but he only tightens his hands on her and looks down with a light smile on his face. Before she knows what’s happening, she has his lips on her forehead. “All good, baby girl?” She stares up at him, a little startled. Suddenly daddy handles her in his hands, turning her a little so she’s almost lying against his chest, nestled in his arms. He presses more kisses to her cheeks and nose, tickling her with his beard. She immediately starts giggling and pushing at him. “Noo...” A gasp from Bucky lets her abruptly stop and stare in shock. He starts pouting. “No more kisses from daddy?” She frowns a little at his face. He does look sad… “Don’t you like daddy anymore?” His pout deepens. Steve snickers from the side though he stops as he notices a shift in her. “Sad?” Somehow, the fact that her daddy might be upset with her makes her sad, too. Her lower lip starts trembling and her eyes start to water, which seems to make everything worse because her daddy doesn’t only look sad but shocked too.

 “No! No, baby girl. It’s alright. I’m sorry. I made a joke.” He presses her tightly to his chest now, kissing her hair, and his hands run up and down on her back as she sniffles. She doesn’t really understand what’s happening. Daddy looked sad but now he’s saying he’s sorry. What’s wrong here? Her fists tighten in his shirt and she hides her face in his chest, strawberries forgotten for the moment as tears start falling. Is she bad to make daddy sad? “I’m sorry, sweetheart.” His voice sounds sorry… maybe distressed. She sniffles a little longer, the confusion still mingling in her head, making her uncomfortable but she looks up at daddy. He still looks sad but he smiles now. Is he sad or not? Y/N feels a little overwhelmed and suddenly a little uncertain. So she looks around, searching for her best friend. She spots the blue bunny uncle Stevie got her at some point and stretches her hand out for it. Bucky quickly catches in and passes it to her. She wraps it in her tiny arms, instantly taking one of its ears, and rubs it gently against the tip of her nose. This usually calms her down pretty fast. “Oh, oh. You messed up big time Buck.” Steve pipes up, looking a little amused but concerned as well. Y/N quickly concentrates back on the stuffed toy. “I know.” Bucky whines, continuously rubbing his metal hand on the back of his girl. “Isn’t she only doing this when she’s uncomfortable or overwhelmed?” Wanda pipes up and ears a glare from Bucky that probably means nothing. Steve nods though. Y/N doesn’t really know what they’re saying but she calms down. She leans on Bucky’s shoulder and he presses his lips yet again against her cheek. “Better, baby?” She nodes and looks up at him. “I know you love me, sweetheart. It was a dumb joke. Daddy won’t say it again.” She nods again but this time her eyes catch the strawberries again. Might be the best chance she gets. She wriggles again, this time fully intending to get off daddy’s lap. “Hey, alright. Would you- Y/N! Stop struggling.” Bucky starts laughing and tickling her sides. She’s startled and screams which turns into a laugh. “I’m setting you down, okay? Just stop wriggling.” He smiles at her, presses another kiss to her forehead, and sets her down. He really likes kissing her forehead and Y/N loves when her daddy does it, though, it does tickle terribly. The moment her naked feet hit the carpet she runs off, not right into the kitchen but behind the couch, her daddy is on. He won’t pay much attention to her this way since he has to turn around. Though she sees him look at her and grin. She smiles back flops on her diapered but and starts playing with her bunny, only waiting for her daddy to lose interest.

Of course, Bucky knows instantly that she’s up to something. Y/N isn’t pretty good at hiding things. Even worse now that she does the same things every time. He knows that, as soon as she hides out of sight, that she has something on her mind she pretty well knows she’s not allowed. His little girl is just a year and then some but she’s damn smart. But he really wants to know what she’s up to so he pretends to turn back to Steve and Wanda, starting a half-hearted conversation once again, still paying attention to any naked feet on the cool floor around the carpet.

Y/N looks up again and sees daddy not looking. In a matter of seconds, she’s up, clutching her stuffed friend to her chest, and rushes off to the kitchen. The chair’s still standing there and Y/N is quick to throw her bunny on it before climbing up on it with only mild struggle. She has practiced climbing with uncle Tony recently. She has already managed to put her hands on the counter as she hears a startles shout. “Y/N! No, god! That’s dangerous.” She tries to ignore the shout, struggling to get her leg on the counter, and… yeah. The leg is up but now she’s stuck. She won’t get forth or back. But before she can start to struggle or cry in distress as her dawns that’s she doesn’t know how to proceed, two hands grab her under her arms. “My… You troublemaker.” The voice isn’t daddy’s since she can see daddy. He’s standing there, hand on his chest breathing fast with auntie Wanda beside him. She has a hand on his shoulder, looking at him in concern. Did daddy hurt something? He looks like her auntie when she falls and cries. “Y/N! You can’t climb on chairs and the counter. You could have fallen down and hurt yourself.” Her eyes instantly switch to the person holding her. Uncle Stevie looks mad but somehow not. He has her in a tight grip but it doesn’t hurt. Her eyes dart from him to her daddy and auntie and then to the counter. “Berry!” She points at it and back at stave. “Daddy no.”

“Yes. Daddy said no because you had lunch.” She pouts at Steve’s answer but hears a chuckle. “She’s quite fast and smart, huh?”

“Wanda!” Bucky looks at her with a stern expression but Wanda only laughs. Y/N continues pouting and starts trashing as soon as Steve gets away from the counter. “Nooo! Berry! Berry!” She quickly gets passed to Bucky who holds her just as tightly, not paying attention to her struggles. “No! There are no berries for naughty Y/N’s.”

“Berry.” Her eyes well up again and she reaches for the bowl that’s way out of her reach now. She sobs loudly but daddy doesn’t give up. He carries her away until Wanda sighs. “Buck. Give her a strawberry.”

“No, she just ate.”

“Come on. Just one. What’s the deal? It’s not like she’s getting sick from one and it’s been almost fifteen minutes since she ate. She will be fine and satisfied and we might not have to fear her climbing the counter for a while.” Y/N doesn’t really know what they are saying, only knowing that it has something to do with her favorite treat and that she’s currently getting farther away from it with every step her daddy takes. She cries louder, now seeing her stuffed friend still at the chair. This is just mean. Her daddy won’t give her any berries, she doesn’t have her blanket or pacifier and her best friend’s currently lying on that chair all alone. He probably is sad, too! “Berry! B-bunny!” She cries louder again not knowing which is worse. No berries or no bunny. “Fine. Fine! Oh my- Sweetheart, please. Stop crying. Daddy’s ears hurt. See, Stevie’s getting your bunny and Wanda will give you a strawberry. Okay?” She feels herself getting rocked and she hears daddy say something but words are hard to understand right now. She only knows her friend is sad. But suddenly the blue friend looks over daddy’s shoulder. “Hello Y/N. Please don’t cry. I’m fine and I’d like a hug. Can you hug me?” The head of her bunny tilts funnily and its arms stretch forward so Y/N forgets about crying and reach for it, pressing it tightly against her chest with only small sobs in between. “Ahhh… This is nice. Thank you”, the bunny says and goes still in her arms again. While she’s busy hugging her bunny, Steve breaths out in relief, glad he prevented further messy crying from his niece. Bucky sighs in relief as well, settling back on the couch with his girl on his lap now. He wipes some of the tears away and lifts her chin so the little girl has to look at him. “Y/N. no more climbing on counters, okay? It’s dangerous and pretty girls aren’t allowed to sit on them, remember?” Y/N frowns a little but nods. She remembers faintly that daddy said she can’t sit on the counter but uncle Sam and Tony always set her on them. It’s a bit confusing. She decides to listen to daddy for now. “Y/N, look what I got you. You up for one?” Her eyes look at Wanda and the… the strawberry. It’s the biggest one she has seen so far. It's almost the size of her hand. Her eyes go wide and her auntie laughs a little. Y/N almost reaches for it but then she remembers daddy’s words. ‘No berries for naughty Y/N’s.’ New tears form in her eyes and her animal gets lifted to her face to hide. She doesn’t see the adults frown and look at each other. “What did I do?” Wanda looks a little startled at the strawberry and then at Bucky. “Y/N, sweetie. It’s alright. You can have it.”

“N-no. Daddy no.” She sobs and leans against her daddy whose arms circle tighter around her, embracing her with comforting warmth. “Oh. Yeah, you’re right but you can have this one. You’re my good little girl again, right?” Y/N nods shakily. “G-good.”

“There we go. Now, do you want the strawberry auntie Wanda has for you?” She nods again but doesn’t look up so Bucky takes it from Wanda with a kind smile and holds it close to Y/N’s face. “There, sweetheart. A sweet treat for a sweet girl.” The thousands kiss gets pressed to her head and she shakily looks at her daddy before she gently takes the huge berry from him. Uncertain she looks at daddy and only starts nibbling on it after he nods encouragingly. It is sweet and proven once again that it's her favorite. She takes her time eating it, getting its juice all over her. But daddy only laughs and that’s fine. She figures if daddy laughs- he’s happy and if daddy’s happy then it means she’s a good girl. A good and tired girl. So as soon as the berry is gone, she reaches for her bunny but daddy quickly catches her hands. “Not yet, Y/N. let's clean your hands and face first so that Mr. Bunny doesn’t get all dirty, yeah?” Y/N really is too sleepy to complain, so she lets him wipe her face with the hated towel before her bunny gets passed to her. In a meter of moments, she finds herself nestled in the crook of her daddy’s arm, favorite blanket around her, pacifier in her mouth, and bunny on her chest. Bucky only needs to rock her a few times before she’s drifting off to a dream with gigantic strawberries and a big blue bunny hopping on grass fields with candy flowers.

[bumblesimagines]

Green Thumb

Part 18

Request: Yes or No

Also kind of short

~

You stared out at the river, fingers warm from the heat of the mug in your hands. You felt tired, empty, and disappointed. The roof was a nice place to sit and think. Your gaze dropped down to the ground below.

"I don't believe this is the safest way to test your abilities, (Y/N). Especially since Sam doesn't have on his wings." Vision said in concern, watching Sam hype himself up. You shook your head, laughing.

"It's definitely not safe." You grinned, watching Sam. He looked down from his spot on the roof, shaking off nerves.

"Run the idea by me again." Vision said as Wanda chuckled softly.

"Alright, Sam is gonna jump off the roof and I'm gonna use my powers to keep up in the air. If they don't work, Wanda will catch him."

"You're gonna allow this, Wanda?" Vision looked at the redhead. Wanda shrugged, sipping on her tea with a small smile.

"Ready?" Sam called, sliding down his googles. You nodded, backing up a bit, grinning widely. Sam backed up out of sight before running off the roof. You raised your hand, watching him suddenly fly up. He screamed, arms and legs flailing.

"You might gonna to catch him, Vis!" You called as Sam briefly disappeared past a cloud. Vision flew up, catching Sam and flying back to the ground. Sam raised a hand to his chest, feeling his heartbeat as he panted.

"Again?"

"Again."

"Kind of chilly out here, don't you think?" You turned your head, looking at Tony. He took a seat beside you, sighing.

"So, how'd it go?" Tony asked, turning to look at you. You licked your lips, lightly shrugging as you sipped on your hot chocolate.

"Good. I learned a lot about my family. It was confirmed that, uh, I was indeed abandoned by my mother. It's great." You told him, giving a small nod. Tony hummed.

"It builds character." Tony said. You snorted, looking down at the hot chocolate.

"Yeah, I guess so." You muttered.

"What'd you learn?" Tony asked, watching you. You sighed, head tilting up. You stared at the passing clouds.

"That my dad was killed here... By.. The Winter Soldier." You breathed out. Tony stayed silent, frowning as he nodded.

"I.. I can't blame him. He was brainwashed and not in control. How did you react when you found out about Bucky and your parents?" You asked, looking at him. Tony licked his lips, looking away from you. He seemed to think about his words, eyes squinting slightly.

"I.. I was more hurt by Rogers than by what Barnes did. Rogers kept it from me and he never planned on telling me. Even if we didn't consider each other friends.. We were teammates. How was I supposed to be okay with trusting him with my life when he was never gonna tell me about my parents?" Tony frowned, sighing heavily. You bit your bottom lip.

"I'm sorry Steve betrayed you like that." You said softly. You wouldn't want to work with someone who betrayed you either. You took in a small breath, looking at him curiously.

"Do you think Steve knows? About my dad?"

"Unless Barnes saw some similarities between you and your dad, probably not. Your dad covered his tracks. He made sure he wouldn't be connected to his family. Very smart of him." Tony offered a small smile. You reached into your back pocket, taking out a photo. It was of the whole family. Your grandparents, Florine, Michael, and even Gerdie as a pup. You turned it around to the back, looking at the phone number.

'Call when you need me, kid'

"People really need to stop calling me kid." You mumbled, huffing softly. Tony chuckled.

"You look like one."

"Oh, fuck off, old man." You gave Tony a playful glare. He scoffed, touching his chest dramatically.

"Are you really gonna retire? I mean, at this point, you're asking to be called an old man." You pointed out, grinning when Tony rolled his eyes.

"Pepper and Morgan need me. I don't want to be an absent father. I know how it feels to have one and.. I don't want to be like my father. I won't make the same mistakes."

"You'll make new mistakes." You shrugged lightly. Tony shot you a look. "But I'm sure you're a great father!"

"Right." Tony grunted, shaking his head. You chuckled softly, placing your cup beside you. You inhaled softly.

"When I was drunk.. I vividly remembering saying that you suck before passing out. What happened?"

"Oh, you were a goddamn mess. Definitely an emotional drunk." Tony replied, making you groan softly, cheeks flushing from embarrassment.

"You said I was a lucky bastard and you cried.. You also kissed me." Tony looked at you, gaze searching for a reaction. Your lips parted, brows raising.

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Uhm.." You licked your lips, straightening up and clearing your throat. You stayed silent, thinking of what to say in response.

"Pepper doesn't have to know. It was a drunk kiss that nobody really saw, right? I mean, I already have enough on my plate. I don't need an angry wife on top of that." You blurted out, shrugging lightly. Tony cleared his throat, nodding.

"Yeah, of course. It barely lasted a second." Tony looked forward, scratching the side of his neck. Awkward silence took over, both you and Tony unsure on how to proceed without making things even more weird.

"How are you?" Tony suddenly asked, turning towards you. "Like, in general."

"Terrible."

"Yeah, I feel that. Wanna... Wanna talk about it?" Tony asked. You stared at him, brows furrowing.

"Are you practicing on me for when Morgan needs a talk with you?" You questioned, head tilting slightly. Tony shrugged.

"Yes and no."

"That's nice." You huffed softly, gaze drifting towards the setting sun. You watched him, shoulders slumping.

"I feel.. Incredibly alone. Yeah, Nat is here but I can't rely on her. She has her own issues to deal with. Bruce... Bruce is god fucking knows where and if I tried talking to him, he'd probably just stand there. Clint is also god fucking knows where. Thor fucked off the moment they came back from killing Thanos. The outerspace crew is kind of weird. Steve is... Steve. He'd just give me a speech and a pat on the shoulder. Carol barely comes to Earth and she's also pretty intimidating." You licked your lips, shaking your head as you brought your knees up to your chest.

"The people I used to talk to have either.. Died or chosen to leave. I have to take care of a big ass fucking farmhouse cause its goddamn owner left! My life is slowly falling apart and I have to comfort myself cause nobody seems to care enough! I am so fucking tired of feeling tired. I thought I had found a family but I guess I'm not good enough for those." You raised your voice, feeling the wind get harsh for a quick minute. You let out a deep breath, eyes shutting to keep the tears from falling. You felt an arm wrap around your shoulders, gently leaning you against a warm body. You sniffle, a shakey sigh leaving you.

"And I am so tired of crying." You whispered. Tony gently leaned his head against yours, hand squeezing your arm.

"I know.. I'm sorry." He said quietly. You relaxed against him, feeling numb and empty. You looked down at the photo. You wondered if this was the life Michael had wanted for you. To be a hero to a planet missing fifty percent of its inhabitants.

"You know what might make you feel better?" Tony asked.

"What?" You sat up, using the sleeve of your jacket to wipe your nose as you sniffled. Tony stood, motioning for you to follow. He offered his hand, watching you pick up the mug. You took his hand, holding it as Tony led you off the roof and down the stairs. You placed the mug on the nearest table, letting him guide you outside and onto the field. You stood in the middle, looking at him with furrowed brows.

"Letting it out." He finally answered, letting go of your hand and taking some steps back. He raised his arms.

"Let it out. Scream, kick, punch, curse. Let it all out." Tony said, smiling widely. You sniffled, still unsure.

"C'mon, I'll do it with you. On a count of three, okay? One... Two... Three!" You inhaled with Tony, eyes shutting as you screamed as loud as you could. You heard Tony chuckle in amazement, opening your eyes. You noticed he had been knocked down onto the grass, the trees nearby having been bent back by the wind. The grass around your feet were burned and gray clouds had formed in the sky. You noticed Tony looking up at something behind you so you turned, blinking and slowly looking up at the large ice spikes that almost reached the clouds.

"Holy shit." You whispered, taking a step back.

"You're still on the tip of the iceberg with your powers, Elsa." Tony said, getting up as it began to thunder. You felt some weight off your chest, turning to face you.

"You know.. That actually did help." You chuckled, smiling gently.

"Well, I am a genius." Tony replied, digging into his pocket and pulling out car keys.

"I should get going. Pepper's cooking dinner and I don't want to miss it." Tony said. You nodded, walking with him towards the road. A sports car drove out of the garage, stopping infront of Tony.

"All my things have already been sent home." Tony said, looking at you. You hummed, nodding.

"You can be an asshole sometimes but.. You'll be missed." You told him softly. Tony gave a genuine soft smile.

"You should visit, kid. You might like my new place." Tony said, opening the door and getting in.

"Give me a call and I'll visit when I can." You said, watching him buckle up. Tony nodded, sliding on sunglasses.

"I'll be seeing you."

"Not really looking forward to it." You replied, hearing a small snort before the car drove off. You watched it go, sighing softly. You looked over at the spikes, licking your lips.

"What more can I do?"

~

Tags: @geek-and-proud @wolfelocksley @babyvisionisamenace @jjk-is-my-shit

[vintage-marina]

A woman out of time (james norrington x f!reader) chapter 2

TW: suicidal thoughts, idk what the word is but the reader is seeing things that isn’t there

You washed your face and looked into the mirror, the circles under your eyes were enormous and it looked like you hadn't slept in days, what indeed was. Every time you closed your eyes you saw the battle of Wakanda or you saw the faces of people that you had murdered. Murdered, you had murdered them. You screwed your eyes shut and clung to the sink for dear life, a sob escaped your lips. I don't deserve this, you thought to yourself, your victims should be alive not you, them. Not you, Vision, Vision deserved it. Or Wanda, Bucky, Sam, Peter, T'Challa everyone besides you. T'Challa, yes he deserves my place, but he isn't here to take it isn't he? You softly hummed a song to yourself, a method to soothe you. After a few minutes of humming, you opened your eyes. Red, your eyes were red, you touched your cheeks and you realised you were crying. You stared into the mirror, you saw yourself but you couldn't reconise her. You stared to face and noticed the scars on it, they were small and were from the bomb that exploded right in front of you and you noticed the burn on your neck. You didn't found them ugly, but you didn't love them either. They were a part of you now and you couldn't do anything about it, just like your arm. You felt neutral about them. You picked up your toothbrush and brushed your teeth, the feeling of guilt slowly washing away. You knew that that feeling would never go away, but just like your therapist said you must learn to live with it, if you wanted to live your life in a somewhat peacful state.

Ever since half of the population died you didn't knew what to do, you felt like you didn't belong in the group that they called themselves the Avengers but you also didn't fit in as a civilian, so in the chaos that Thanos left you packed your bags and moved away, after you were fully healed ofcourse. You left everyone a handwritten letter and then you moved into a little old house on the shore.  

You heard the telephone ringing, you walked toward the livingroom and picked up the phone. Maybe it was Steve, Natasha or Tony you didn't knew. You wiped your tears away, stupid ofcourse because the caller couldn't see them. ''Hello, with Y/N'' you said into the phone, it was Natasha. ''Hey Nat! How are you? No, I'm not crying why did you think that?'' ''You know that you don't have to lie to me right? But if you don't want to talk about it, you don't have to'' ''Yeah, I've been crying but I'm fine now. '' The last part was half a lie, you were fine but a few minutes earlier you weren't. ''Im glad to hear that you are doing alright, sometimes it is just so hard you know?'' You hummed in agreement, not knowing if she talked about her past or about the guilt she felt with the whole Thanos hassle. '' But, Y/N/N, I, no we have something important to talk about. Scott, you remember Scott right?'' ''Yeah, I remember him, he was snapped right?'' ''We thought that too but a few hours ago, he showed up on our doorstep of the compound.'' ''So he wasn't snapped away, you mean'' now it was her turn to hum in agreement. ''Y/N, what I want to tell you is that we can bring them back and we want you to be there,'' you smiled a little and you whispered: ''Ofcourse, I will be there'' ''We will pick you up in an hour, see you then'' ''See you Nat'' Natasha hanged up and you pressed the telephone to your chest and let yourself fall on your little couch and let out a laugh. A few minutes ago you felt on a point of breaking down and now hope streamend into your veins.

An hour flew by and you saw in the distance three figures walking, one blond headed, one red headed and one had dark brown hair. You openend your door and welcomed them inside, ''Hi guys'' you said to them and gestured that they can sit down, you went back to your little kitchen and brought back some drinks and cookies. You sat on a chair and turned your eyes to Scott, ''so you just showed up after 5 years of radio silence?'' ''Yep'' ''how?'' ''I got stuck in what they call the Quantum Realm'' ''What the hell is that?'' you mumbeled, ''Alright so, that realm is a microscopic universe on its own and if you want to be there you have to be really tiny. Time works different there and basically I got stuck there'' ''What do you mean time works different there?'' you asked to him. ''Well, I was missing for 5 years right'' you hummed in agreement, ''but for me it was 5 hours. So I thought what if we can navigate that universe and can enter it at a certain point in time but then exit the realm at another point of time.'' Your eyes widend and your brain couldn't proces it really, ''I don't understand what you mean and that doesn 't make ant sense Scott'' he sighed and then said: ''Timetravel'' ''Like back into the future type of thing?'' you said to him, ''Wait how do you know about back into the future Y/N?'' said Natasha surprised, you turned to Natasha ''I saw it on the television ofcourse!'' Steve furrowed his brows and said: ''How have I never heard of that movie?'' you shrugged your shoulders and focused your attention back to Scott. ''So how do you guys want to timetravel, I still don't understand how you guys want to do this but I'm in.''

At the compound

After you guys could convince Bruce to help, things had happend quickly. First of all he was green, that was pretty weird for you and for the rest of your team. He explained to your group that he emerged himself and the Hulk together, you were pretty grossed out about this and was scared to asked how he did that. Secondly, you couldn't convince Tony to help out wich was disappointing but not surprising, after all you two held contact and you knew that he had a family. You understood that he was scared to loose his life or his family so you didn't try to persuade him into helping your group instead you were chatting with Pepper. Thirdly, without Tony's help was Bruce all alone on how to make this time travel thing. You hoped that he knew how to make this thing, but you weren't so sure about it. Scott was the test person and when he was gone you thought it finally worked but instead he was a teenager, then he was a baby, then he was a grandpa and then he was finally back to normal. There was panic and not just a little! Natasha was relieved when she saw that Scott went back to normal and Bruce spread his arms out and said proud: ''Timetravel!"

''But it didn't work really work'' you noticed, ''yes but also no'' Steve shaked his head and then Bruce said: ''What? I see this as an absolutle win''

Night time

A radio was playing a soft melody. The woman who you stared at didn't move a muscle, she looked like a dear in headlights. Time moved slow, to slow for her and sweat was forming on her forehead. You didn't even knew her name or why you were here, you only knew you had one job. The room reeked of blood and it was coated on the floor, you raised your arm and pulled the trigger before she could even scream. You could hear her body fall, finally you woke up and you could hear your heart racing. You clenched your jaw and stepped out of your bed, your feet touching the soft floor, you hummed softly trying to calm yourself. But you couldn't hear yourself, all you heard was the soft tune of the radio. Shuffling in the dark is never easy, your fingers touched a wall and your eyes went wide. Blood, why was there blood on the wall. You squeezed your eyes and then you saw the pattern on the wall. It was dark green with little leaves and flowers on it, your hand flew towards your mouth when you realised you were not in your bedroom anymore. You turned your head and then everything went back to normal. You didn't saw the blood splatters and the wallpaper anymore but you were in your bedroom?

The next day

A lot happend during the day, Tony showed up out of nowhere. Thor was back, who looked like shit. Rhodey suggested to go back in time when Thanos was a baby and to strangle him, which you found very amusing and Clint showed up with tattoos and a sad background that he killed people just because his family passed away. Everyone grieves differently I guess, some people like me you thought are gonna live in solitude and other people are gonna kill people for the fun of it. So now you were lying on the floor next to Bruce, Natasha and Tony trying to figure out where the stones are. Tony, Bruce and you were arguing about which place and time is the most convienent but Natasha broke your quabble. ''Guys, if you pick the right year there are three stones in new York'' ''Shut the fuck up'' ''You're a genius you know that right'' ''Whoah'' were the three things that were said in unison to her.

After five years you finally wore your suit again. The med pack on your bag felt familiar and you almost forgot how thick the leather was, the only bad side was that you now had to wear a mask. On your wrist was a watch and after twenty explanations from Tony you understood how to work with that thing, above your suit you wore another suit were you would timetravel in. You are going to travel with Tony, Scott and Steve to New York 2012 because Tony could help you with your suit when you didn 't knew how to work with it. ''Can someone please explain to me why I would have to wear a mask again?'' Actually you did know why, because the four of you didn't want to risk that 2012 Steve would regconise you. The Avengers and you were walking in unison and you guys formed a circle. Natasha and Steve looked at eachother and she said to him smiling: ''See you in a minute'' a machine whirred above you and you clicked on a button to summone your helmet and then you were shrinking.

It was a really weird experience to say atleast, your tummy was doing cartwheels and you felt your fingers (but not from your vibranium arm) tingling. You saw blue everywhere and it looked like honeycombs. You marveled at this, but then someone's elbow went into your ribs and you flew out of the orbit. Instead of going right with the others you went straight ahead. Shit, shit shit! But everything went so fast you didn't even had more time to think about it. A flash happend and you had your eyes shut. Your vibranium arm was stuck into something but not for long, whatever your arm was in was ripping and flew down with you. You could hear yells and cursing and then you fell on the ground. Well, not ground but on wood? You heard it crack underneath you and you thought you had fallen through the floor. Something is strange here, you didn't hear any cars, you didn't hear airplanes and you certainly didn't smell the fumes. You sniffed again, and you regconised it, it was salty and now your ears heard the soft waves of the ocean. You were on the ocean, you cracked one eye open and right in your face was a small man with dirt on his cheeks and wearing a mullet. ''Witch! A witch is on our ship!'' Fuck.

[lilbabycee]

Going undercover with Steve and having him get PISSED and distant bc he has to watch u wear revealing clothes and flirt with some attractive men, Yanno just about do anything to get them to spill

(i wrote a whole bucky fic like this):

steve would absolutely be so irritated at tony for suggesting it

he hates the thought of anyone touching his baby in the first place, but to have to watch you actively flirt with people??

yeah he’s definitely not a fan

right before you land, steve pulls you aside in the quinjet and wraps his arms around your waist, cupping your jaw with his large palm and sighing loudly

“what’s wrong, babe?” you scan his face with concern. “is it the mission? did you not like our plan? do you not think it’ll work?”

steve sighs again, debating on whether or not to divulge his feelings to you about what’s about to happen tonight, but he holds back - he doesn’t want to burden you with that and knows that you’re a professional through and through

“no, that’s not it, sweetheart. just missin’ you.”

“i’m right here, stevie,” you grin up at him, pressing a quick kiss to his lips before going back to the table to strategize with tony and rhodey

when the time comes for him to watch you hang onto those men and flirt relentlessly with them, he still can’t help the way that his knuckles pale from tightly gripping onto his whiskey glass

their hands wander down to grope your ass or rest suspiciously low on your back as you rest your head on their shoulders

one man in particular (the target) pulls you in for a kiss and you look so bubbly and giggly that steve’s entire face turns red as the glass he’s holding shatters and cuts into his hand

he’s too angry to care, watching your lips against a stranger’s, and although he knows that it’s purely because of work, he can’t help the sense of betrayal that pierces through his heart

but as he goes to intervene, rhodey materializes next to him and drops a firm hand on his shoulder, giving him a meaningful look

“don’t,” is all he says, tugging the blonde man backwards and steve listens to him, though he grits his teeth and clenches his jaw

and when you’ve gotten what you needed from the objectively attractive man that you’ve been seducing, all you can think about is how much you want to be with your boyfriend

but when you meet him back on the quinjet after tony comes to grab you, he’s sitting in the pilot’s seat, ready to go

you frown slightly because he usually meets you right at the door but shrug it off, coming up behind him to wrap your arms around his shoulders

“hey,” you kiss the space right below his ear and he doesn’t even move, unflinching with a square jaw and a steady gaze in front of him

“stevie?” you try again, kissing his cheek this time until he shrugs you off and turns to rhodey:

“are we ready to go?”

and then he proceeds to ignore you for the rest of the flight, speaking to everybody onboard but you

at this point you’re upset but more annoyed than anything else because he’s treating you so coldly

and it goes on like this for the next couple of days - he sleeps in his own quarters instead of coming over to yours and actively avoids you

he hasn’t said a single word to you and you’re tired of it, so you corner him at breakfast

he’s been eating even earlier than usual so that he misses you on your way to training, but you’ve figured that out and are able to catch him staring into the depths of his cereal

“what’s going on, steve?” you cross your arms and shake your head in disbelief

“what do you mean?” he still doesn’t look up at you and you blink hard, scoffing

“are you really just gonna sit there and act like i haven’t been trying to talk to you for days now and you’ve just been ignoring me?”

“don’t know what you’re talking about. i’m talking to you now, aren’t i?”

you can believe what you’re hearing so you shake your head as your eyes prick with tears

“you know what? i don’t fucking have time for this. whenever you’re ready to act like an adult, let me know and we can have a conversation.”

you end up crying into your pillow for half an hour and then you attempt to distract yourself by doing some reading, but your mind keeps drifting back to steve

there’s a knock on your door and you yell “come in!” without really thinking about it too much

your very tall blonde supersoldier walks in guiltily, noticing the redness of your eyes and the residual tear tracks on your face

“god, y/n, i’m so fuckin’ stupid,” he groans, walking quickly over to where you’re lying and gathering you in his arms

you attempt to bat him away, squirming and hoping that he’ll release his hold on you but his grip is tight as he pulls you into his chest and rests his chin on top of your head

“m’so sorry, angel,” he rocks you slightly. “i was bein’ an asshole, i didn’t mean to make you cry.”

“yeah, you were an asshole,” you grumble, arms crossed against your chest. “you didn’t even tell me what was wrong...?”

“it’s just,” he sighs exasperatedly, running a hand through his hair, “i couldn’t bear to see those guys all over you... and i know that it’s part of the job and you’ve been doing this for years, but i’ve never had to see it first hand and upclose like that. it really— it really didn’t feel good.”

you’re silent for a few seconds before you release all the breath in your lungs

“oh, baby,” you coo, looking up at him, “i’m sorry as well. but you should’ve just told me. i thought you— i don’t know, i thought you hated me for some reason—?”

“i could never hate you, baby doll,” steve kisses your forehead and stares deep into your eyes. “and i know i should’ve just told you but i know how much you like your independence and i didn’t want you to think i was— i was trying to infringe on that somehow.”

“no, please don’t be scared to tell me things like that. if it really makes you that uncomfortable, i’ll be sure to give all of my honeypot missions to nat, unless it’s dire and she can’t make it.”

“i really appreciate that, sweetheart, but you’re so good at what you do. so maybe just the ones when i’m coming with you?”

“sounds good to me,” you lean up to press your lips against his soft ones. when you pull away, you smile up at him sweetly. “can we take a nap?”

he looks surprised but nods, pulling you into him as you lie down

“can’t sleep without you,” is the last thing you say before falling asleep in the arms of your boyfriend whose heart swells at your words, his love for you threatening to bring tears to his eyes as he stares down at you

oh god i am gonna cryyy

[dismuch47]

ADVANCED SETTINGS (Part 1)

And the winner of the Scarlet Vision Drabbles Voting is... Advanced Settings! With Custom Skin as a close second. Luckily this one is turning out waaay longer than I thought it would be, so I had to break it into two parts. Second part will come out later this week. 

It’s been awhile since I’ve fanfic dabbled, so this has felt really nice. I feel I will be writing more about these soulmates.

Advanced Settings: Wanda and Vision find there is more to iron out in making their relationship “work”. Rated Mature.

Wanda made her way down the narrow stairs, holding her two bags close to her person. The creaky boards protested against her dainty weight and brown chips of aged paint flaked away with each step of her boots. She strode to the stained plaid couch in the musty living area and plopped down her burdens. A roach scurried out from between the cushions and zoomed to the sanctuary of a hole in the upholstered armrest.

No… she would not miss this location.

“Has anyone seen my… oh, I see it.” Wanda walked to the defunct treadmill in the corner of the room, plucking her ear-pods from the treadmill’s control panel. The train ride would be long and music was the only way she would survive it. She shoved the corded earphones into her jacket pocket with her phone and smoothed the sides of her hair behind her ears as she ran through her mental checklist again.

“Got your ticket?” Natasha inquired over a near empty dinner plate, supplying the reminder, not out of real concern but rather a sense of familial normalcy. She was a stern but stunning mother hen.

“Ah… yes!” Wanda had to pat herself down and found the ticket in her back pocket. She held it up victoriously before putting it in the smaller of her bags. “I think I have everything…”

“Not everything.” Steve’s rich tenor voice cut in over the hissing and bubbling of the shabby kitchenette that occupied the same small space as the living area. He placed a plate of peppered chicken, plain rice, and steamed broccoli in front of Wanda before draping a dish towel over a toned shoulder. “No one should travel on an empty stomach. Eat up.”

Wanda scrunched her nose up at the the corny paternal grin he gave, but accepted the plate. She took her seat at one of the mismatched chairs that occupied the dingy room, refusing to sit on the couch with food. 

“Moscow… my old stomping grounds.” Nat sighed, before taking another bite of chicken. “Shto-to s chem-to.” Her Russian was comically muffled by food.

“I’ll take pictures.” Wanda promised, scarfing rice. “I’m forcing myself to take in more of scenery this time. But I swear once I’m in a hotel, all I want to do is shower and never leave the bed.”

Wanda winced as soon as she dropped that setup.

“Oooooh? Do tell…” Wanda had actually forgotten that Sam was in the room as well, as small as it was. He had been unusually quiet, nursing some leg soreness from a tech-recalibration injury. Nothing seriously hurt, save for pride. The plastic baggies of ice duct-taped to his thighs sloshed and clacked as he shifted in the only run-down chair with padding. “And when exactly are we gonna meet this mystery boyfriend of yours? Who pays your way to exotic locations and expensive hotels, hmmm?”

Wanda gave a tight smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes… and forked more food into her mouth to occupy it.

Sam chuckled at the intentional silence. “I see how it is.”

“A girl’s got to have her secrets.” Nat supplied, taking her plate to the sink to rinse. “Besides, I don’t recall you being very open about your copious tawdry affairs back at Avenger Headquarters.” Wanda smiled down at her food, thankful for the deflection of topic.

“Copious, yes. Tawdry… never.” Sam grinned back, putting his joined hands up behind his head in bemusement, leaning back in his chair. “I’m an open book about the ladies, Steve can tell yah.”

Steve shook his head, but acknowledged it was true with a dimpled grin. A far cry from his blank expression that used to overshadow his stoic face at any mention of Avengers history. It had been 8 brutal months since the fall-out with Tony Stark and the US government.

“And as I seem to recall, Romanoff, you were caught more than once coming back to the compound. Late. Shoeless….” Sam continued.

“Late night scrapbooking.” The ex-assassin responded dryly. “Scout’s honor.”

“And then we have Mr. Virtue over there. Clamped tighter than a nun’s thighs…” Sam continued.

Steve gave an innocent shrug. “Gentlemen don’t kiss and tell.” Nat was looking down, but gave a small grin, arms folded over her chest. Wanda briefly wondered if the two had ever connected on a level other than as a commander and his right-hand.

“Tony, well… Tony had Pepper.” The topic was exhausted, but he kept talking. Steve turned away, back to the grimy stove to tidy-up. “Brody,  shit, I don’t know how Brody had time for anything other than cleaning up after Stark, but he consistently wowed even me with all his ‘war stories’ in the battle of love.”

“And Clint was the honorable family-man.” Wanda said half-heartedly. She turned her wrist up to check the time on her watch.

“Yeah. Good man. Good man.” Sam nodded, respect for the settled existence that Hawkeye had found and chose over a life on the run. “And then there was Vision...”

Wanda’s grip on her fork slightly tightened. 

“Yeah, I couldn’t figure that guy out. He invited to his room, like, twice to talk about a painting he purchased. Twice. One of the three things in his room. A little odd…”

Wanda’s jaw tightened. The painting was a New York Street Artist’s rendition of the Tree of Life. The artist was also blind. He created a picture from memory, using odd colors to convey a synthetic translation to the image to stand out against what would be considered normal and correct. It created something beautiful and breathtaking in the process. It resinated with Vision deeply. The proceeds went to a medical facility that specialized in therapeutics for children with disabilities. Wanda had been there with the Synthezoid when he had become enamored with it at first sight. Had come to his room numerous times afterwards to talk about it, or just sit with him, staring at it’s mastery as he read aloud.

“I don’t think he ever…you know?” Sam finally said. It cut through Wanda’s thoughts. “I mean, how could he? I don’t think he even had the… machinery… for it. Poor guy.”

“Sam…” Steve didn’t have to look at Wanda to feel her bristling. He didn’t always understand it, but he knew that she had a close friendship with the synthezoid.

“Oh don’t tell me you never wondered about it.” Sam huffed.

“No, Sam. I don’t wonder about a teammate’s junk.” Steve turned around, impatient that his friend wasn’t picking up on his annoyance. He took a sip from a mug of black coffee.

“Or lack, there of.” Sam countered, oblivious.

“I have to go.” Wanda stated, louder than needed. She went to the sink with her plate.

“To be fair, Vision has molecular control of his physical structure and density.” Natasha continued, to Steve’s surprise. “So, in theory, he could get the job done. But it would be very one-sided.”

Sam raised his eyebrows. “How so?” 

“I imagine it would be like using an over-elaborate vibrator. All sensation for the partner… nothing for him.” Nat shrugged. “A safe and controlled simulation, where there is nothing asked of you.”

Sam blinked at the thought-out response. “Damn, Romanoff…”

Dishes clanked loudly, even angrily, at sink. Wanda didn’t meet Steve’s concerned look. “Sorry I don’t have time to clean these.” She strode to her bags on the couch and muttered a farewell before storming out of the apartment. The door slammed shut with the flick of Wanda’s wrist and a flash of bright scarlet energy. 

Sam’s brown eyes drifted from the door where the youngest teammate had just left. He glanced at Steve and Nat. “Did I say something?”

“We all did.” Steve put his mug down on the counter, brows knit in concern. “Vision is her friend. She misses him.” He gazed at the hot brown liquid in his mug thoughtfully, thinking of those who he missed. “We shouldn’t have talked about her friend that way.”

“Oh…” Sam blinked, and then frowned at himself. “I didn’t  think… Should I go and-?“

“Just stop talking for a sec and take your pills.” Nat interrupted, striding over to him to offer two painkillers in one hand and a glass of water in the other. “I’ll go talk to her. Smooth things over before she leaves.” Sam nodded sheepishly and accepted her offerings.

Steve made a noise of protest, to perhaps leave Wanda be, but Nat gave him an understanding “Time for Girl Talk” wink before stalking after her companion’s trail out the door.

It didn’t take her long to catch up with Wanda, who walking down the stretch of road to the nearest bus pick-up to take her to the station.

“Hey.” Nat called, not even out of breath after the jog. “You did forget something,” she held up a flash drive. “…with the next meet-up location, job details, instruction on-“

“How could you say all that about him?” Wanda shot back.

Nat considered her young teammate… her friend… for a moment. “Well, it’s the kind of thing I would say if I didn’t think that you had an intimate relationship with Vision going on, currently.”

Wanda’s lips thinned into a firm line. She crossed her arms and looked down at her feet.

“It’s the kind of thing that throws the boys off the trail about what I saw in the Netherlands when I tailed you.” Nat shook her blonde-dyed head. “I hate lying to teammates. Especially Steve. But out of respect for you and female bonding, I’ve kept my word. Keep yours and don’t let your feelings ruin your focus.”

“If you think my focus is a problem, why even let me go?” Wanda asked.

“I wouldn’t.” Nat retorted. “But Rogers seems to think you deserve some semblance of a young-adulthood. He thinks your mysterious Euro-boyfriend phase is healthy for you. And that’s of utmost importance, considering how closely your control is tethered to your emotions.”

Blunt, as always, but Wanda appreciated the honesty. And the freedom. She reached out for the flash drive after a moment. “I’ll keep my head down. Check in when I need to.”

Nat nodded approvingly, then turned to leave.

“Natasha,” Wanda called, halting her friend. “Did…did you mean what you said, though?” She searched Nat’s guarded blue eyes for truth. “That…he can’t feel what I...”

The silent response was deafening.

“That I’m  just… using him?” Wanda finally ventured.

“I won’t pretend to understand… any of that.” Natasha shrugged. “But what does it really matter what I think?”

It wasn’t reassurance. And the cold sentiments expressed in the apartment would loop themselves in Wanda’s head, no matter how loud she turned up her music on the bus. And then later on the long train ride.

As farmland and rolling hillsides blurred past, Wanda kept her forehead pressed against the cool glass of her window. She felt like Vision, her mind endlessly running and playing out memories and scenarios whether she wanted it or not. Analyzing and computing to try and find a solution to ease the pit in her stomach. 

She knew that Vision could feel. She had stumbled upon that realization during one of their first few kisses, 5 months ago. What linked her given abilities to it’s source in Vision’s forehead, though unexplainable, proved that what she felt for him…label-less yet profound…he definitively felt for her. And her absence from him, the lack of that engulfing feeling, caused him a wounding loneliness. It’s what had made Wanda want to give herself fully to him.

But with the introduction of intimate relations 1 month later…

Vision had learned everything there was to know about her body and what delighted it. What actions and sentiments yielded the most sincerest, and surfeited, responses. Always so lost in her desires and satisfaction, she always believed it when he said that his greatest pleasure was bringing about hers. But if she really thought about it…. really thought about it…

Wanda pulled her knees into her chest, boot heels digging into her seat. 

He didn’t moan. He didn’t sigh. He didn’t heave. He didn’t lose himself like she could completely in him. His eyes never left her face even when she had to close hers in convulsive ecstasy. His broad and handsome smile was always waiting for her when she would come back to reality. Waiting and in need of no reprieve.

She hated this feeling. This feeling that she was doing something wrong. That she was taking and taking without giving when she would literally set the world on fire if it meant Vision’s well-being.

Wanda was so consumed that she didn’t look up to take in the environment of Moscow as the taxi pulled in to take her to the hotel. She almost dreaded it. She was tugging at her sleeves to cover more of her hands. Did Vision have resentment about this? That she could flaunt how human she could be when he couldn’t? She hadn’t thought about that when she took the plunge to have him. She had followed instincts and emotion… like always. Wanda rubbed her forehead, upset with herself.

She checked in as usual, requesting a key to a room under “Victor Shade”, always left for her at the front per Mr. Shade’s instructions. The front desk clerk was beaming at Wanda, expressing how nice Victor was and how he talked about his world-traveling girlfriend with so much admiration. Wanda smiled weakly and accepted the extra $100 room credit gift because Victor was just “so sweet to hotel staff”.

Wanda stepped off the elevator and drudged down the hall to their room. She arrived and took her keycard out, ready to use it on the card-scanner, when the door swung wide open. 

Vision was there, beaming down at her stunned face, keycard still held up in her hand. Though of course, at the risk of being seen even for an instant, he was visible in his human mapping. Blonde hair smoothed with a slight, playful waive. Skin fair but peppered with human imperfections like freckles, freshly shaved skin texture. But his cerulean eyes were the same piercing blue true to his actual form.

“The front desk computer confirmed your arrival.” He said, to quell her surprise. “Wanda. Darling.” He said, deeply, and reverently. “Welcome to-“

Wanda let her bags fall to the floor and leaped up into his arms, legs wrapped as high on his torso as she could manage, lips crushing the end of his sentence. Vision grinned handsomely against her needy lips.

“I’ve missed you.” She managed finally, pressing her cheek against his.

“I reciprocate your sentiments.” He combed graceful fingers through her auburn hair. “Considerably, so.

***

Ever the perfect gentlesynthe, Vision carried his barnacle of a girlfriend to the suite’s luxury bathroom. She detached from his waist with a gasp as he showed her the candlelit bathroom, large clawfoot tub frothing with lavender scented bubbles, soft piano renditions of movie love-themes emanated from a portable radio he had relocated from the bed stand. He gave a controlled ray from the mindstone in his forehead to bring the lukewarm temperature of the bath back to a simper again.

“Vision… this is…”

“Exactly what you need after a long day of training and travel.” He placed a hand on either side of her head tenderly and tilted her forehead up to plant a kiss. His human facade shimmered away with the contact. “Are you hungry?”

“No.” Wanda then realized that she didn’t even eat her whole dinner. Hours ago. She reconsidered. “Well…”

“How about Olivier Salad? Or Shuba? Better known as ‘Herring under a Fur Coat’? A Russian delicacy, as I’m sure you’re aware.”

Wanda scrunched her nose up at Vision.

“Cocktail shrimp and cheese sticks it is. “ He grinned at her default preference.

“And wine! You know the kind I like…” She added, unzipping her jacket.

Vision smiled, emitting a chuckle. He left her in privacy to unwind and rejuvenate, while he called down to the front about room service to be delivered in 30 minutes. He then sat down to compose a note on hotel stationary, thanking the staff for the lovely presentation of the room and the warm reception for his Wanda. Satisfied with the flourish of his penmanship, he then accessed streaming guides to find vintage sitcoms that might please Wanda.

Only 10 minutes had passed when he heard his name being called from the bathroom.

The synthezoid was there in an instant, concern conveyed in his tone. “Wanda, I’m here. Are you-“

“I’m fine, Vis.” His human girlfriend peeked over the tub’s edge, visible only from her shoulders and up. Her long hair was wound in a sloppy bun, piled atop her head. “I just… wanted to look at you…”

Vision felt his lips curl into yet another smile. A frequent, unprompted state of expression when Wanda was near. “And…?” He inquired, kneeling to the floor to gain eye-level with her rich hazel gaze. 

Wanda bit her lip, taking his hands in her own, lacing her soapy fingers with his maroon digits. “And… I think you are wearing far too much. For a bubble bath.”

“You would like me to join you?” Vision asked, after a beat of processing the subtextual request. “Would that not defeat the purpose of… relaxing?”

“I’m tired of relaxing alone.” Wanda retorted, leaning her head down against their joined hands. “Come assist me.”

Vision stood, untangling his fingers from hers, and began stripping down. He could easily phase through his clothing, but he found the act of undressing much more interesting and human than being unencumbered by the physical properties of clothing. It also slowed down his naturally speedy rhythm of existence, which he observed pleased Wanda. The human drank in the sight of her nude synthetic boyfriend, mindlessly swirling her index finger around in the warm water she soaked in.

One long vibranium-infused leg stepped into the tub. Wanda maneuvered to the far end to make room, until Vision had sat down, adjusting his sculpted length to the confined space. She floated herself to sit on his lap, her back leaning heavily into his chest, auburn head resting against the dip of his shoulder. She signed deeply and emitted a noise of contentment at the feeling of him against her. Vision brought a hand up to cup her dainty shoulder. The other slipped across her belly, splayed out to absorb the toned smoothness of her.

“This feels nice.” Wanda murmured. Vision smiled into her neck, planting a firm kiss at the base. “Does this feel nice, Vision?”

Something in her tone of her inquiry sounded peculiar. As if there was an answer she was desiring. It puzzled the Synthezoid, who had most of her variations of responses and phrasings committed to his memory. But humans were complex and ever-evolving. Wanda was no exception.

“I am very content  to be a variable in your relaxation.” Vision retorted. He was met with silence. She was unable to see the smile on his face falter. “Unless… you wish for something more stimulating now…” HIs hand skimmed through the water, over slick skin, down her navel, to the her silky region. Seeking her sensitive entrance…

Wanda lightly clenched her thighs together, pulling his hand up out of the water and kissing his knuckles. “I just want to sit like this for a bit, Vis.”

There was a pause before his response. It made Wanda wince. “Of course, darling. Whatever you desire.” He wrapped his arms around her shoulders. “Is this alright?”

“Yes…it feels nice. It always feels nice.” Again, her words said pleasant things, but conveyed a tone ill-at-ease.

“Wanda?” 

She turned to face Vision, straddling his lap. Chest to chest.

“I’m sorry….I…” She sighed deeply. “Natasha said something and… it got to me.” Wanda looked up into Vision’s cerulean eyes. “I don’t… use you… do I? When we are together?”

“Use me?” What an odd statement.  His hand cupped the side of her face. “I have no qualms about being put to ‘use’ by you, Wanda. Ever. If that is what you ask.”

“No. I mean… ugh, how do I say this….”

“You know you can say anything, Wanda. I’m made of vibranium. I won’t be damaged.”

Wanda smiled weakly. He had come so fair in his speech patterns. Had learned personality traits that he obviously preferred. She could feel… him… a soul within, if that was what it was. She took comfort in that. 

“When we come together, intimately-“

“Sexually.” Vision supplied. Unabashed.

Wanda huffed. “Yes…sexually… you give so much. And I’m not complaining. At all. It’s… unreal.” 

Vision smiled tenderly, placing another hand on her other cheek, kissing her lips the way she had showed him awhile ago. He liked the little noises she made when he did so. And would watch her face as their lips departed from one another, her eyes usually heavy with serenity and arousal.

But not tonight.

“What do I give you, Vision?” Her inquiry was direct. She rested a cream-colored hand against the rich maroon and reflective vibranium of his chest.

Vision tilted his head at her. “Your pleasure and well-being is of paramount significance to me.” His eyes blinked excessively as she pulled her face away from his contact. He had said something unsatisfactory. “Is that not enough?”

Wanda’s gaze was now downcast. “I suppose I underestimated how much it would mean to me. To not be able to give you pleasure. To not see you able to take it for yourself, instead of just for my sake.”

The sythezoid’s eyes darted away as he processed. Avoiding her returned hazel glance. He knew it would betray his discomfort. But stoicism was not what he wanted with his Wanda during moments like these. He wanted her to see him… really see him… even in time of uncomfortable vulnerability. 

“This body was not made with human reproduction in mind, but synthesized evolution.” Vision said, finally breaking the silence. “Pleasure, desire… arousal… these are constructs that I loosely understand in definition only, and by observing how they manifest in you…who I care a great deal for. And that was enough for me.”

“Was?”

He finally brought his eyes back to her face. Her expression, contorted in aching sympathy, made his eyes close. The repressed hurt upon his face seemed an honest response, though he knew it would further upset the situation. He sought to remove himself before causing Wanda more distress.

“Vision, no…” She gently protested, but his form  disappeared from the tub and rose outside of it. The vibranium striations across his broad back glittered from the reflection of the flickering candlelight. “Vis…”

He turned towards her, his smile was back, as if it had never left. “Room service will be here soon. I surmise it best I not greet them naked.” He stooped to kiss her on top of her head, then collected his clothes before leaving her presence.

[spooderboyandtincan]

The Friendly Neighborhood Exchange

By @spooderboyandtincan for @iloveirondad

Rating: Not Rated

Relationships: Peter Parker & Tony Stark, May Parker & Tony Stark, Harley Keener & Peter Parker, Harley Keener & Tony Stark, Tony Stark & The Avengers, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, James "Rhodey" Rhodes & Tony Stark

Characters: Peter Parker, Tony Stark, Harley Keener, May Parker, James "Rhodey" Rhodes, Natasha Romanov (Marvel), The Avengers, Clint Barton, Sam Wilson, Steve Rogers, James "Bucky" Barnes

Summary: Unbeknownst to Tony, Harley is bullying his kid. 

Ao2 Link: Here

A/N: @iloveirondad Thank you so much for the prompt! It was so fun to write!

Peter couldn’t remember when he started referring to Tony as “Dad” in his head. But he could count on one hand the times he had actually called Tony that.

The first three times they had brushed it off, Peter blushing a dark red, Tony smiling into his palm and tears blooming in the corners of his eyes.

The fourth time, Peter lay in the medbay with a white bandage wrapped around his head and Mr. Stark clutching his hand tightly, and he had called him Dad. Tony had teared up (and began to cry) and said he would love it if Peter called him dad.

Peter had it all planned out. It was all he could think about the entire day, even in science when he was reprimanded for not paying attention. He’d jump into the car, grin, and say “Hi, Dad! Guess what score I got on the science quiz!”

He felt a warm rush every time he thought of it. 

Peter rushed out of the school, shouting a quick goodbye to Ned. He flung the car door open. “Hi, D- oh. Happy? Umm, h-hi.”

“Don’t sound so disappointed, kid,” said the driver. Peter shut the passenger door, sighing, and opened the back door. 

“Where’s Mr. Stark?” he asked. 

Happy met his eyes in the mirror. “Boss is at the penthouse. He has somebody he wants you to meet.”

Well, that sure cleared things up, Peter thought. Was it a doctor? A therapist? A scientist? His evil clone?

When he arrived at the penthouse, he wasn’t met with an insane doctor trying to kill his mentor with a bludgeon, just Tony and a kid sitting at the kitchen island, drinking strong coffee.

A kid.

A young man, he corrected himself. He was tall, far taller than Tony and much taller than Peter, with his hair wavy and styled with what must have been copious amounts of hair gel. He wore a red flannel shirt with sleeves he’d buttoned at the elbow, and ragged, torn up jeans with gray sneakers.

“Pete!” Tony exclaimed, jumping up to giving him a quick side hug and ruffling his hair. “Hey, buddy. How was school?”

“Fine. Who’s that?”

At his dreary response, Tony’s eyes glinted with worry. “This is Harley, kiddo. He’s staying here while he looks at colleges. And Harley, this is Peter.” 

The young man, Harley, stepped forward, extending his hand. “Hey, Peter. Nice to finally meet you.”

Peter shook his hand and smiled, joining him at the kitchen island. “Nice to meet you too!” 

“I’ve heard a lot about you,” said Harley. “And I mean a lot.” He glanced towards Tony, who was bustling around, making hot chocolate and cider and getting snacks, oblivious. “It’s all he ever talks about. ‘Peter did this, Peter did that, guess what Peter’s doing right now.’” Harley rolled his eyes. “It gets pretty annoying, to be honest.”

“O-oh. Sorry?” Ouch. 

“Eh. I can tolerate him,” he shrugged. Peter glanced down at the table, running his finger across the lines in the wood. They sat together, the only sounds coming from the clinking of a spoon against a pan as Tony made hot chocolate.

“So what are you?” Harley whispered suddenly, leaning forward. “His secret kid?”

He blinked. “No, no, um… I’m just his intern. Personal intern.” The lie sounded forced, even to him. He was Tony’s kid, biological or not.

“Right,” the young man said skeptically. Peter looked at the table awkwardly, before a plate of cookies was placed in front of him. 

“Thanks, Mr. Stark.” Peter grinned.

“Of course, bud.” Tony pulled up a stool next to him, and Peter felt a warm hand on his back. He grabbed a cookie (double chocolate-chip) and sipped his mug of hot chocolate.

“It’s September,” Harley said suddenly. 

“Indeed it is,” Tony replied, not looking up from the plate of cookies, hand hovering above them while he tried to decide which one he would take.

“So why are you drinking hot chocolate?” He looked at Peter, frowning and perplexed, like Peter had performed some unspeakable offense.

He blushed and took a large drink from his mug. “It-it’s just cold out. Y’know.” 

Plus, he couldn’t thermoregulate. Most days he would do anything to get warm. Besides stealing Tony and Ned’s sweatshirts, he could (and would) down ten cups of hot chocolate in a single sitting.

Tony immediately jumped to his defense, sensing Peter’s discomfort at Harley’s not-so-kind words. He stood up and poured another cup for himself, looking Harley directly in the eye. “Cheers.” 

Tony hid his smile behind the mug when Harley looked at him like You too?

~~~~~

“So, Tony, what have you been doing?” asked Harley. “I haven’t heard much about you, just Peter.”

The older man chuckled, twisting spaghetti between his fork and spoon. “Superhero duties keep me pretty busy, kid. Not much else to talk about.” 

Harley scoffed. “Yeah, right. All those ‘superhero duties,’ and you have the time to… you can spend time with your personal intern?” He gestured to Peter. 

Peter knew without looking that there was a tension in Tony’s shoulders, knew that every single instinct in him was screaming ‘protect Peter.’

I don’t need protecting.

But before Peter could say anything, Tony spoke up. “Maybe you can tell us?” he joked, keeping his tone light. “You seem pretty interested in my personal life.”

Harley pursed his lips and frowned. “I was just curious.”

Tony nodded but stayed silent, though he reached out to pat Peter’s back gently. Harley did seem oddly fascinated with Tony’s personal life and his relationship with Peter.

But who would blame him for being curious? 

“Maybe that’s enough about me,” Tony said, trying to keep the air light. “Harley, how have you been?”

The other man snorted. “Boring. My sis just started high school, Mom got a new job, and I have a month till graduation.”

“That’s so cool!” Peter exclaimed, eyes lighting up. “What college do you wanna go to?”

“Anywhere away from Tennessee. Can’t wait to get out of that shit-hole.”

“Watch your language, there’s a kid.” Tony was only half-teasing. He covered Peter’s ears. “You may proceed, young sir.”

Peter shook Tony’s hands off his ears, though he could still hear perfectly fine. “I’ve always wanted to go to MIT! Do you think you might go there?”

“I told ya, kid, anywhere away from my house.”

~~~~~

Peter held back a gasp as thunder and rain pounded in his ears. Ow ow ow.

His attempts were useless, however, as Harley snorted and rolled his eyes, “Aww, you scared?” 

Peter frowned at Harley’s sudden change in mood. “N-no.” He winced, both at the thunder and the way his voice cracked. “No. I’m not scared.”

It just hurts.

Peter listened carefully for Tony’s heartbeat, hoping the man would come to calm his nerves, but the storm had completely drowned him out. Even with his super-hearing he could only hear the pounding rain.

Tony had been dragged to a meeting by Pepper, who claimed his presence was absolutely necessary. He had hoped Peter and Harley could spend some “bonding time” together, but that wasn’t going too well. 

It wasn’t going well at all. 

Peter would give anything for Mr. Stark to realize that he needed him. 

“Christ, what are you, a baby?” Harley snapped as Peter flinched. “Does Tony have to deal with this shit?”

Peter hid his face in his knees. You’re stronger than this. Don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry. He squeezed his eyes shut, but one pearly tear slipped out. 

Tony had seen him cry, more times to count, and always he was soft and gentle and kissed his temple, and wouldn’t let go of Peter.

“You crying, sweetheart?” Harley mocked, his voice high pitched and false. “Shit, you’re such a disappointment.”

Stop it stop it stop it. Harley’s words tore at his heart. Stop talking.

“Actual question, though,” he smirked. “Does Tony even care? It has to be a charity event, right?”

Tears leaked from Peter’s eyes. “No.”

Tony loved him, and had told him countless times how much. Tony loved him more than anything.

But Harley’s words drummed into his mind. He couldn’t help the tiny, almost unnoticeable sliver of doubt creep into his head.

Tony loved him. 

Right?

“Lemme break it to you Parker.” Suddenly Harley’s hand was squeezing his shoulder almost unbearably tight. “He doesn’t care.  He doesn’t care. Trust me, it’s for publicity, and I know it. I know him.”

Tony would never, ever lie to him.

“Don’t touch me,” Peter whispered weakly. “You’re lying.”

“I’m doing you a favor, Parker you know that? You’re just a naïve little kid.” He squeezed his shoulder again. Peter was sure he had finger-print shaped bruises forming on his skin. “You don’t know anything.”

No no no Tony-

With that, Harley flopped back on the couch, winking maliciously at the other boy, and turning on the tv. Peter buried his head between his knees, trying to hide himself in the cushions. 

Tony loved him. Peter was going to call him Dad.

“Hey, bud, what’s up?” 

Peter jumped when Mr. Stark’s figure suddenly appeared in the doorway. Though he glanced down the moment Tony’s eyes met his, he could see the flash of worry and parental panic on his face at his tears.

“Hey, hey, oh no,” Tony murmured, rushing to his side. He squeezed next to him in the armchair and cupped his cheek with warm, gentle fingers, wiping his tears away. “No, honey, what’s wrong? Shh. Are you hurt? Do you feel bad?”

Peter shook his head frantically, not wanting to cause anymore heat between Harley and himself. Tony smiled warmly, though his eyes were worried and he was desperate to help his kid. “Really, bud? ‘Cause it sure doesn’t look like that.”

He glanced nervously at Harley, who sent him a warning glare.

“I’m fine.”

Tony sighed. Peter held back a gasp when he turned to Harley. “Kid, do you know what happened?” 

The young man stood, faux worry crossing his face. “No. I have no idea. Is he okay?”

Another sigh rustled Peter’s curls. He blinked back tears, sensing how distraught Tony would be seeing him cry. 

He slipped out of his hold and ran.

“Peter!”

~~~~~

Tony’s day, which had been going surprisingly well, upended the moment he got an alert from his AI.

The alert filled the screen of his phone when he picked it up, not that he wouldn’t have noticed anything that read ‘Peter’s emotional distress rate at 7/10 and rising.’

Of course, how could he have been so stupid? Peter’s senses must have been going insane while the storm pounded outside. Tony ran for the door, his chair falling back in the process.

Ignoring the exclamations of the old geezers behind him (“Stark, where do you think you’re going?”) he rushed up the stairs, knowing the elevator would take far too long. 

“Hey, bud, what’s up?” he asked, attempting to hide his concern as he glanced at his kid, who was curled in an armchair with his head between his knees. 

Shit.

When Peter looked up, Tony had just enough time to see his red eyes and the shiny tear tracks on his face.

“Hey, hey, oh no,” he cooed, hugging Peter tightly with one hand and wiping his tears away with the other. “No, honey, what’s wrong? Shh. Are you hurt? Do you feel bad?”

Tony’s worry was only slightly assuaged when Peter shook his head, because it was obvious his kid wasn’t okay.

“Really, bud? ‘Cause it sure doesn’t look like that.” Please, baby, tell me what’s wrong.

“I’m fine.” 

Tony sighed. Oh, buddy. Hoping to retrieve some information to why his kid was so riled up, because sensory overloads always left him clinging to Tony, not shying away.

Something must have happened, and it terrified him.

“Kid, do you know what happened?” 

“No. I have no idea. Is he okay?” Harley stood up, biting his lip and looking worried.  

He glanced back to the boy, and was shocked when he flinched, and then broke from his hold and ran.

“Peter!” Tony jumped up to follow his kid. 

“Pete, open the door, please,” he begged, knocking on the wood. “Let me help you, buddy, c’mon. Please.”

Silence.

“Please.”

Nothing. 

He tested the doorknob and was surprised to find it wasn’t locked. “Petey, I’m gonna come in, just to check on you, okay?”

The door swung open and Tony stepped inside and-

The room was empty.

The window was wide open, curtains whipping back and forth in the wind, raindrops falling on the window sill.

He dashed to the window and leaned out, shielding his eyes from the rain. “Peter?!” He squinted, desperately trying to find the form of his precious spider-kid. 

“FRIDAY-”

“Already on it, boss,” said the AI. “Tracking Peter.”

Tony barely noticed when the suit formed around him, too distracted by FRIDAY’s voice. 

“Boss, I am unable to find Peter’s location.”

“Try again, call him,” he ordered, blasting straight through the window, glass shattering around him. 

The phone rang.

And rang.

And rang.

“Boss, he didn’t answer-”

“Try again.” He searched the tops of the buildings and the alleyways frantically, his suit focusing on every heat signature and determining it wasn't his kid.

Please, please, please be okay, Peter

The call rang. Peter didn’t pick up.

I’m coming Petey, I’ll find you

There-

A small figure with a bright blue hoodie.

Peter!

~~~~~

Peter wiped his tears away angrily and yanked on his mask. He didn’t bother to get the suit, just snapped on his webshooters, opened the window, and jumped.

He let himself fall for just a little too long, the wind screaming and whistling in his ears as he dropped.

He caught himself in barely enough time, his curls brushing the cement before he went shooting upwards.

Peter swung from building to building, gliding through alleys, jumping over gaps in apartments. He jumped down to the pavement and rubbed his eyes under the mask, then started walking in a feverish haze.

Mr. Stark loved him, right?

Of course he did!

It was so clear. When he looked in the man’s eyes they were filled with love and fondness and it was so obvious how much he cared- and when Tony cupped his cheek and kissed his forehead and spoke softly to him, like he was the only thing in the universe that mattered.

But Harley’s words had drilled doubt into his mind.

He gulped and tried to shake his thoughts away. Shut it, Parker. It’s not true. Shut up.

Unfortunately, he couldn’t silence his own thoughts that simply. 

Does he love you? Does he? 

Yes!

Are you sure?

...Yes.

Stop it it’s not true-

“Hey! Put your hands up.”

The hairs on his neck and arms prickled. He turned slowly, raising his arms.

He was met with the muzzle of a pistol.

“Dude,” he mumbled, sniffing and hoping his tears hadn’t leaked through his mask. “Not cool.”

“Spider-Man!” the woman gasped, the gun shaking slightly. “I-I didn’t…” she took a deep breath and steeled herself. Shaking away her ponytail and adjusting the ski mask on her head, she snapped, “I need money and you’re gonna give it to me.” She clicked the safety off the gun. “Isn’t that right, spidey?”

“Ummm, I don’t have a wallet- I mean I have one, I just didn’t bring it with me because… um… stuff like this happens,” Peter rambled. “I mean, no offense! I just like to plan ahead- actually I didn’t plan ahead, I kinda just jumped out of the window, but I mean, you get it, right?”

“What?” she snarled. “No excuses, Spider-Man. Give me the fucking money.”

“I’m telling the truth, lady. I don’t have any money! So if you could just put the gun down maybe we can hug it out?”

Normally he would have been faster, his reflexes quick and blinding, but when he had said “hug it out” he remembered how much he wanted a hug.

A hug from Tony.

And then there was a loud bang that nearly shattered his eardrums and bullet pierced through his side. And then another bang. And one more.

White hot pain radiated through his torso and Peter had to hold back a sharp cry. He doubled over in pain, clutching the bullet wounds. He could tell from experience that all three bullets were stuck in his flesh. Peter collapsed to the ground, blood already soaking the thick material of his sweatshirt.

It must have hit something important, he thought hazily.

The woman knelt next to him and turned his body over roughly. Peter whimpered as she elbowed his wound. She dug through the pockets on his hoodie and gave a disgusted curse when her now bloody hands found no money. 

“Told ya,” he mumbled, gazing up at the night sky.

He’d forgotten it was raining. Had it been raining this whole time? 

Peter liked the rain but he didn’t like thunder. It was too loud.

The villain stood up, cured again, and kicked his body in displeasure. He groaned. “Damn you, Spidey.” And then she ran.

At least she didn’t take off my mask, he thought. Peter blinked slowly and moved his hand to rest on his face.

It was getting hard to breathe, which probably wasn’t good. With his last ounce of strength, he peeled off his mask. Panting heavily, he realized too late that now he couldn’t call Tony.

(Shouldn’t have disabled that tracker)

“Tony,” he gasped. “Dad. D-Dad.” 

He glanced up. Were those repulsors he heard in the distance? Or was it just his imagination?

~~~~~

“Peter!”

Iron Man sped towards the ground at breakneck speed, so fast that a warning alert popped up on his screen.

“Pete,” he whispered, landing with such force that he cracked the pavement. “Petey.”

He sprinted forward and collapsed to his knees and for a moment his hands hovered over Peter’s body, not sure what to do. “Baby.”

He dug his fingers into the boy’s pulse point. The beat was there, to his overwhelming relief, but weak and staggered. 

Tony sobbed quietly, blood covering his fingers. “Petey- Petey, wake up,” he begged “I’m right here, kiddie, you just gotta wake up, okay?” Tony pulled Peter to his lap and cradled him against his chest with a gentle touch. “Please, baby. Wake up.”

He smoothed Peter’s bangs from his sweaty brow and kissed his forehead tenderly, trying to coax him awake, to let his kid know that he was right there. 

The child’s eyes fluttered and Tony gasped. “Petey. Wake up, honey, you’re doing great. Open your eyes, bambino.”

“D-dad?” Peter rasped, blinking up at him. 

“Oh, baby, I’m here, Dad’s right here,” Tony cooed, cupping his cheek and rubbing his thumb against the soft skin. He struggled to pull off his jacket and pressed it against Peter’s wound.

Peter gave a sharp cry. “Dad… it hurts. Stop! H-hurts!”

“I know it hurts, baby, I’m so sorry, I’m gonna help you, okay? You’re gonna be okay, honey,” he assured him with a gasp. God, he was hurting his kid. “We’re gonna go visit Helen, she’ll fix you right up. I just need you to hold on, okay? Hold on for me, please, Petey. I need you.”

Peter took a shuddering breath and whimpered. “Hur’s… hur’s, Dad.” 

Tony nodded and squeezed his eyes shut, kissing the top of Peter’s head, wishing the horror of his baby, lying limp and bleeding out in his arms, wasn’t true. God, he wished this was just a horrible nightmare, wished he could wake up and find Peter safe and warm in bed. 

“P-Pete, oh baby, I’m so sorry. I’m supposed to protect you. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry baby.”

“No… ‘ony, don’ c-cry,” Peter slurred, reaching up a trembling hand. Tony grasped it like a lifeline and pressed his lips to the knuckles.

“Dad,” he mumbled. “Dad. D-do you… do you l-love me?

Tony stared at him for a moment, eyes wide, trying to grasp how his precious kid could think he, who loved him with his entire heart and soul, didn’t love him. His kid, who was his life, his entire universe. 

“Peter,” he choked. “Petey, I love you so much, so so much. I love you more than anything, baby, I love you so much. I love you.”

Peter grinned hazily up at him. “K-knew it.”

And he exhaled shakily and his eyes slipped shut. 

“N-no,” Tony whispered. “No. No, no no no, no! Peter! Peter, wake up! Peter! Wake up right now!”

Tony sobbed and dropped his forehead against Peter’s rocking him back and forth gently. “No, no no no, please, please no,” he moaned. 

Tony ran shaking fingers across Peter’s clammy brow, then kissed his forehead firmly. “Goddammit, Petey, hold on.” Tears trickled down his cheeks. 

He lay Peter on the ground, heart aching every second he wasn’t holding his child, and let the suit form around him, then scooped up his kid, adjusting him gently in his arms, and shot into the sky, thrusters at full speed. 

Peter’s vitals appeared on the screen in front of him. Tony’s eyes flitted from Peter’s baby face to his steadily weakening pulse on the screen.

Oh god, stay with me sweetheart

His heart beat so fast he doubted it could be detected. He urged the suit to go faster, faster, speeding to the tower medbay. 

“FRI-” he began shakily.

“I’ve contacted Dr. Cho and Dr. Banner, boss,” the AI assured. “They’ve prepared the medbay and are ready to help Peter.”

“Okay. Okay. Good.” 

Peter would be okay

He had to

Tony needed him 

Tony mumbled to himself, hysteria setting in as he sped to the tower. The time passed in a blur of fear and worry, and Tony just wanted to hold Peter in his arms, safe and warm and alive.

Please!

Just let him be okay.

Suddenly Tony was thudding against the landing pad and was met with the med team. They were prepared with a cot and various medical equipment that Tony couldn’t bother to name. 

“Tony!” Helen Cho rushed towards him. 

“H-Helen, help him,” he begged. “Help him!”

“I will, Tony, breathe. You need to give Peter to us.” She reached out to take the boy from Iron Man’s arms. Tony pulled away protectively, shielding Peter, before the rational part of his mind realized to help Peter he would need to let go.

He could only watch in terror as the med team swarmed over the boy, wires and tubes and monitors slapped to his chest and face. Peter was rolled away on the cot, before something in his brain snapped into place. 

God, he had to protect Peter, he had to be with his baby he had to protect him, he couldn’t let Peter go he couldn’t let go-

Tony sprinted after his kid. “Peter!”

 ~~~~~

 May, Rhodey, and Natasha rushed into the medbay at the same time, Rhodey’s braces echoing in the bare hallways. 

There they found Tony, sitting against the wall of Peter’s surgery room, wringing his hands and staring off into space. His eyes were red and silvery tear tracks stained his face. 

“Tony! What happened? Is Peter okay?! Where is he?” May yelled. Tony flinched in surprise. 

“May,” he said, his voice gravelly. “May, I-I…” Tony massaged his face. The three knelt next to him, Rhodey’s arm around his back, May’s hand on his shoulder, and Nat’s hand on his foot.

“What happened, Tony?” Rhodey said softly, obviously worried for his (kind of) nephew. And his best friend, who was clearly devastated. 

Tony sniffed. “H-he was shot. Three times, I think. I-I…” He held up his shaking hands, which were covered in blood. Peter’s blood.

May gasped. Nat’s composure slipped for just a second. Rhodey squeezed his eyes shut, then stood up and came back carrying a warm, wet cloth. 

Gently he took Tony’s hand and began to work the blood off them. Tony normally would have teared up at his best friend’s kind gesture, but he could only think of his beloved kid, in the room right next to him, having strangers poke and prod and cut him. His kid, who was alone and bleeding and hurt-

Oh god. His baby.

Rhodey caught Tony in his arms as he began to sob. 

He just wanted to hold his kid. Make sure he’s safe. Protect him so he is safe. Please.

May patted Tony’s back, lost in her own thoughts. Nat stood up and paced the length of the hallway and back again, her black boots clicking against the tiles. 

Peter’s surgery lasted three more hours, full of anguish and crying, with Natasha and Rhodey trying to comfort the frantic parents (and themselves). 

Tony remembered how close his kid had been to fading away, to never wake up again.

(If Peter died, he would too. He knew it deep down. He couldn’t live without his kid.)

He sniffed, and nearly missed the sound of the surgery door swinging open. 

Helen walked out, sighing wearily. “Gang’s all here?” she joked. 

Tony bolted to his feet, the rest following. 

“Peter?!” he gasped.

She nodded. “He’s okay, Tony. We’ll be moving him to his normal room in about ten minutes, and you can see him after that.”

Tony’s legs felt weak as a rush of relief  nearly caused him to pass out. He crumpled into Rhodey’s chest, bursting into tears once again. May hugged Natasha, who looked a bit surprised but smiled and wrapped her arms around the other woman.

The ten minutes passed achingly slow. They hovered around Peter’s room in a swarm of worry. And when the door opened, Tony was the first to run in.

Peter was pale and limp under the layers of blankets, numerous wires attached to his skin under his hospital gown. The room was dark, with only only one lamp casting golden light on Peter’s face, with the shades to the window closed. 

Tony rushed to his kid, bending over his still body and cupping his face, pressing his forehead to Peter’s. Tears trickled down his cheeks and landed on the boy’s face. He sobbed and pressed kiss after kiss to his forehead and ran his fingers through his delicate curls.

May appeared on Peter’s other side, clutching one of his small hands. She took a damp, warm rag and, not unlike Rhodey had done for Tony, began tenderly wiping at the cuts that he must have earned when he collapsed to the alley floor. She paused for a moment and kissed his cheek, gazing at him as if taking in every detail of his face. 

Tony reached out to take the cloth from her and dabbed at his baby’s face gently, eager to do anything that would help his kid, no matter how small. Natasha appeared behind them and held out a box of Spider-Man bandaids, smiling. 

“For моего ребенка паука,” she said, then retreated to the corner of the room where she hovered silently, watching Tony and May coo and fuss over their kid.

Tony took the bandaids and gently stuck them on Peter’s minor wounds. May chuckled quietly and plastered a bandaid to Peter’s chin. 

Tony carefully sat on the side of the hospital bed, playing with the boy’s soft curls. May pulled up her usual plaid armchair and continued to hold his hand tightly. The inventor murmured a few words in Italian to the boy, quiet enough so that if Peter was awake he would be the only one who could hear.

And then they both flinched violently, Tony leaping up to stand in front of Peter, when the door slammed open with such force it made a small dent in the wall.

Tony cursed angrily, glancing down to his kid to see if he had woken up prematurely. Peter’s face stayed lax.

He sat back down and took Peter’s small hand. “Harley, what are you doing here?”

“What happened to him?” Harley asked, ignoring the other man. “Like what, he’s dying now?”

Tony’s face went pale, his eyes wide. He swayed where he sat, and May darted forward to support him. “It’s okay, Tony. It’s okay. He’s okay,” she comforted. 

Natasha stepped from the shadows and put her hand on Harley’s shoulder, forcefully leading him out of the room. They could hear the young man protesting as they walked down the hallway.

“Tony?” May asked. “Are you okay?”

Tony took a deep breath and exhaled shakily. “No.” He forced a laugh.

“He’ll be okay.”

“I know,” he muttered. “I-I just hate it. I hate seeing him so-so hurt and scared and I’m scared, then he tries to reassure me when I should be doing that for him- God.” He had his hand in his hair and looked seconds away from pulling it out. “I just wish I could keep him safe,” he whispered, tears prickling in his eyes.

“I know,” said May. “Believe me, I know.”

 ~~~~~

“Rhodey,” May laughed. “Guys, this is too much.” She looked at the basket of round, oreo shaped Spider-Man pillows, to the four flower vases on the table, to the clusters of balloons tied to the end of the bed, to the various collections of cards by the flowers. 

Steve sighed. “Yeah, we know. We’ll give some to Clint’s kids.”

“No, you won’t,” Clint retorted. “I’ve tripped on three skateboards today! Three different skateboards!” 

“You can’t trip on a plushie,” Sam muttered.

“Try me! I’m the master of breaking my back!”

Bucky handed a packet of Spider-Man stickers to May. “He loves to stick these on my arm. Thought he might like these.” He leaned back into Steve’s chest and gazed up. The other man squeezed his shoulder and kissed his lips as if in some strange limbo/ twister game. 

Rhodey shrugged. “Least we can do is take care of this human disaster.” He poked Tony’s forehead and observed his disheveled appearance. Tony blinked and rubbed at his tired eyes. “Tony, you have to take care of yourself.”

“I appreciate it, everyone, thank you,” May assured. “I know Peter will love these.”

Tony picked up one of the Spider-Man plushies and tucked it under Peter’s blankets. He was squeezed next to the boy on the hospital bed, leaning against a pillow which must have been decimating his back. “There you go, bud. It’s a mini-you.” He smiled and gently ruffled his curls.

The room went quiet when the Avengers reluctantly left, forced out by Dr. Cho, who had come to refill Peter’s IV bag. Tony kissed Peter’s forehead and gently moved his head to the side when she drew out a needle, knowing that even though he was asleep, his kid hated needles.

They sat in silence once the doctor left, silently wishing for their kid to wake up.

“Pete,” he choked out suddenly. “Come on, baby, you’ve had enough time to sleep. Wake up for us, buddy, please.”

He hadn’t expected his kid to wake up, but maybe his hope was enough, because Peter’s eyelids fluttered. The two parents gasped.

Tony leaned forward, rubbing Peter’s cheekbone with his thumb and trying to coax him awake. “Come on baby, you can do it. You can do it, wake up, Petey. Wake up, there you go, that’s it.”

Peter’s eyes opened slowly. He moaned and blinked, then managed to get his eyes halfway open. 

“There he is!” the man exclaimed. “Oh baby.”

May waved from his other side. “Hi, sweetie.”

“D-d… Dad? Aun’ May?”

“Right here, honey,” Tony cooed, his heart exploding with love. Dad. Peter had called him Dad! His voice was lost in emotion for a second. 

“Hi,” the boy mumbled, grinning lazily.

“Hi there, Spider-Baby.” He bent to kiss his forehead. “How are you feeling?”

“Mmmmm… feel good. Like ‘m floatin’.” He turned his head. “Hi Aun’ May.” 

“Hey, sweetie,” she murmured. 

“Wassup, bros?” he slurred loopily. They both laughed.

“Not much, bud. You slept through the night, the team came over, and… oh, I’m missing something, let me see… oh, right you got shot.” He raised one eyebrow which made Peter laugh. 

“‘M s’rry. Got distracted.”

“It’s okay, buddy. You’ve got nothing to be sorry for.” Tony desperately wanted to let his kid know that he didn’t have to apologize every time he almost died.

Peter hummed and squeezed Tony’s hand weakly, who squeezed back with considerably more gentle force. “Can I ask you something, kiddo?”

“Sure.”

Tony smiled. “Buddy, a few nights ago, you asked me if I loved you. Remember that?” He continued when the boy nodded in confirmation. “What did you mean? I love you so much, Petey. Did I do something wrong? Did I… did I say something bad?”

He held his breath. Had he accidentally hurt his kid? What had happened to make Peter doubt his love?

“N-no, no! I said that because… because I-I…” he took a deep breath. “Few days ago I was talkin’ t’ Harley… an’ he said you didn’ love me an’ that I was jus’ for main’ you look good. But I knew that wasn’ true.” He smiled. “Knew it.”

The ice cold shock that had hit Tony soon dissolved from anger to pure, unbridled fury.

“Harley,” he repeated, almost snarling. “Harley told you that?”

“Mm-hmm.” Peter was oblivious to Tony’s anger. “Knew he was wrong.”

“Petey- yes, he’s wrong, he’s so so wrong, baby. You know that right? You know I love you so much, so damn much?”

“I-I know, Dad. I love you too. More than… than… all the letters i-in the universe! P-plus all the stars, an’ the bugs, an’ all the little pieces of yarn in the c-carpet!”

Tony grinned fondly, kissing the boy’s forehead. God, he loved this sweet kid. “I bet I love you even more than that, buddy.”

He pushed his anger down, down, until all that was left was his never-ending love for his kid.

“Even more?” Peter gasped, eyes sparkling. “No way!”

“Yeah way,” he teased, running his fingers through his hair. Ma smothered her laughter with a hand.

“W-well, then I love you more than a-all the pixels on my computer. On all of the computers!”

“Wow, bud, that’s a lot, huh?”

Peter smiled proudly and nodded. He turned his head to his aunt. “Love you t-too May.”

“I love you too, sweetie.” She smiled and adjusted one of the little Spider-Man plushies by his side, letting him grab onto it. 

“G’night,” he said, eyes drooping. 

“Goodnight, baby,” Tony whispered, pressing a long kiss to his forehead. “I love you.”

“Nap time already?” asked May gently, smiling. “Goodnight, Pete. We’ll be here when you wake up.”

Peter’s eyes closed and his breathing slowed. His hand went limp in Tony’s, who gave it a tight squeeze.

When they knew he was deeply asleep, the pair shared a glance. 

“Who,” May asked, “is Harley?”

~~~~~

Tony strolled down the hallway casually, composure cool and collected.

On the outside.

On the inside he was a turmoil of rage and anguish and a familiar aching to get back to his kid.

But first he had to find another kid. A certain young adult. 

That kid.

The kid who had fed lies and seeds of doubt into his own kid’s mind. Doubts about a father’s love. Saying the unspeakable. 

Who caused his kid to get shot. Three fucking times.

Harley.

“Hey, kid,” he greeted calmly, sauntering into the living room where Harley lounged on the couch, swiping away on his phone.

“Hey, Tony. Geez, what happened to that kid? He get shot or somethin’?” Harley barely glanced up, not concerned it slightest.

In fact, he looked satisfied.

Stay calm, Tones. Stay calm.

“As a matter of fact, he did.”

“Fuck, man. That sucks.”

Yeah, it sure fucking does. My kid, my baby almost fucking died and it was your fault, and all you say is “that sucks?”

“Sure does. He’s doing better, though,” Tony continued. “What I wanna know is, why was he out there? Any ideas?”

Harley shrugged, not willing to share much more. “Maybe he likes the rain?”

“Maybe that’s it,” Tony considered. The icy anger flooded through him again. “Or maybe, just maybe, it’s because you told him I didn’t fucking love him. Think that’s it?”

Harley glared. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Really? ‘Cause I saw the footage, Harley. ‘It must be a charity event, right?’ ‘He doesn’t care?’” Tony’s eyes must have been red, he was so angry. “Kid, I really don’t think you know me as much as you think you do. You don’t know me at all.”

“Save it,” he snapped when the other man tried to protest. “He almost fucking died because of you. He could have been killed. You could have killed my kid.” 

“He- I-I-”

“I don’t want to hear your excuses. I want you to get out.”

“W-what? What do you mean?” Harley blinked up at him, his sneakers still getting dirt on the couch.

Tony’s face grew deadly serious. He physically had to grab his hand to restrain from calling the suit. “He. Almost. Died. You need to get out of my house and away from my kid.”

“I-I didn’t-” he began to protest. 

“Out, or I’ll call security. You need to leave,” Tony snarled.

Harley blinked, then jumped up and ran, tripping over his shoelaces as he rushed to the elevator. Tony watched, glaring, as the door closed. 

A few minutes later, FRIDAY announced, “Harley has left the building, boss.”

“Good.”

He would have loved to talk to that kid for hours, about how much he hurt his precious kid, how much he hurt him.

But he had a kid to get to.

Tony hurried back to the medbay, not bothering to knock on the wooden door and making May jump.

“Is he gone?” she asked.

“Yeah. I don’t think we’ll be seeing much of him again.” He grinned.

May nodded. “Good.” She smiled to herself, patting Peter’s foot.

(It was obvious she had a strong hatred for the man who had almost killed her nephew.)

Tony sat on the bed, making sure not to disturb the child with his sudden weight, and kissed Peter’s temple tenderly, his gaze filled with love as he memorized every detail of his kid’s face, then smoothed his hand over his curls. “Don’t worry, buddy. He won’t be bothering you ever again.” 

~~~~~~

/ST*RKER DNI/

~~~~~~

Taglist: @imissyoutoo @aj-that-person @tonystark-deserves-better @nathaly-ab @skeeter-110 @peter-and-tony-vlogs @teammightypen @joyful-soul-collector @loveliestdisappointment @depuella @scwene-qween @honeythepooh @pixiethefirecat7 @spider-man-lover @bringitonvoldie @queen-of-sarcasm-25 @roxy3457 @memilon @iron-loyalty @gralaca @bitchingpretty @pillowspace @thatminecraftgal @clockworkteacup @hatakehikari @keep-a-bucket-full-of-stars @friendly-neighborhood-exchange

If you want to be added/ removed let me know!

[ifmywishescametrue]

pancakes and stuffed bears

2k of fluffy alpha bucky/omega tony (with mentions of alpha steve / stuckony) for my @stb-bingo square: o5 - trip to ikea

also on ao3

Bucky wakes up slowly, groggily realizing that Tony is whispering his name. A finger pokes his cheek, and he slaps it away with his eyes still shut. He rolls onto his stomach and buries his face in his pillow, mumbling, “No, go away. It’s too early.”

Tony whines his name this time, dragging it out to be almost ten seconds long, as he shifts to straddle his lower back. He can’t lean down very far with his swollen stomach in the way, but he can still use his hands to prod at him. Fingernails drag lightly down the back of his neck, making the flesh rise in bumps. 

“It’s almost ten,” Tony says. “Get up.”

“Go bother Steve.”

“Steve isn’t here. You’re the only one I have to bother, and your daughter wants the Swedish pancakes from Ikea.”

Bucky turns his head to the side, cracking one eye open to frown up at his mate. “Where did Steve go?”

“Unimportant. The pancakes are the real issue here.”

Bucky laughs, “Pancakes are only for people who tell me where Steve went.”

Tony rolls off of Bucky so he can sit up. “I was half-asleep when he said it, so all I know is that there was a problem with something at the gallery that might have to do with the opening on Friday or it might have nothing to do with it, but it was either Sam that called him or it was Sharon.”

Bucky gets up from bed and looks over at the omega, who’s already dressed in a stretched out t-shirt that used to be his and the maternity pants that he begrudgingly wears even though he hates them. Tony’s hand is covering the bump, rubbing slow circles into it. 

He smiles at the sight even as he says, “That’s not all that helpful.” 

“I’m honestly not that sure it had anything to do with the gallery now that I’m really thinking about it. He might have said he was going there later and somewhere else now, but there was an S name mentioned somewhere in there for sure, though.”

“So all we really know is that he’s somewhere that isn’t here,” Bucky summarizes, opening the closet to find some clothes to get dressed. 

Tony sighs, “Yeah, he should really know better than to tell me things by now.” 

Bucky pulls out the first things his hands touch, ending up with a plain white t-shirt and jeans that might actually belong to Steve instead of him. When they moved houses, they didn’t do a very good job labeling the boxes, and as a result Steve and Bucky discovered that their closets might as well be interchangeable. Coupled with how often Tony steals their things these days, he has no idea what’s his and what’s someone else’s anymore. 

He gets dressed and tosses his dirty pajamas in the hamper, then tells Tony. “Just give me ten minutes to finish getting ready and we can go.”

“Really thought I would have to persuade you more on these pancakes,” Tony comments, following him into the bathroom. 

“After the ice cream incident last week?” Bucky raises his eyebrows in the mirror as he reaches for his toothbrush. “I’m not questioning any of your pregnancy cravings after that, baby doll. I think you traumatized poor Steve.”

Tony rolls his eyes, a small smile on his face as he leans back against the counter. “He’s recovered from it by now, and it’s not my fault that the baby wanted rocky road and he brought home moose tracks.”

“The baby is awfully demanding lately,” Bucky teases, squeezing out toothpaste onto the brush. “Wonder where she gets it from.”

“Probably you.”

Bucky hums through his mouthful of toothpaste, and he lifts his free hand to rest on Tony’s stomach. He can’t help but touch it every chance he gets, hoping to feel their daughter kick beneath his palm. She usually responds to the sound of his or Steve’s voice, and they’ve both been known to spend long periods talking to her just to feel her move. Tony alternates between loving it and hating it, depending on how many times she’s already kicked him in the bladder or ribs that day. 

He spits out the toothpaste and rinses his mouth, then finishes off the rest of his morning routine with as much speed as possible. 

Before they leave he grabs his wallet and phone, checking the device for any notifications from overnight. There’s a text from Steve waiting for him, and he reads it while pulling on his shoes. 

“Steve is at the zoo with Sam because one of their chaperones for the field trip dropped out at the last minute,” he tells Tony as they walk downstairs to the front door. He turns his screen so Tony can see the picture Steve sent of him with Sam and Natasha’s son in the butterfly house. There’s a blue butterfly on Steve’s shoulder, and Alex’s eyes are crossed as he tries to look up at the orange one on his forehead.

Tony frowns, “Wow, that doesn’t sound familiar at all. I don’t think he said that.”

Bucky reads directly from the second text in the chain, “‘And when you talk to Tony, tell him that I told him all of this earlier, and he said ‘that’s nice’ then fell back asleep.’”

“Well then.”

Bucky laughs as he grabs his car keys from the hook on the wall. He sends Steve a reply while walking down the front steps, telling him to have fun and send more pictures. Almost immediately he receives another one, and he shows it to Tony once they get in the car. 

“Look at this one, babe.”

Alex is on Sam’s shoulders, eating from an ice cream cone that’s dripping onto Sam’s head. Sam doesn’t look amused by it, but Steve’s grin shows that he’s loving the situation. The caption says, “That’s going to be us soon,” with four smiley face emojis. 

Tony doesn’t say anything, and when Bucky glances away from the picture to look at him, his eyes are wet and his lip is quivering. 

“Baby, are you crying?”

“No, I’m fine,” Tony says unconvincingly, wiping at his eyes with the back of his hand and completely failing to keep the tears from falling. 

Bucky snaps a picture of it and sends it to Steve. 

“Fuck you, asshole,” Tony whines, the tears flowing freely now while Bucky tries his best not to laugh at him. Pregnancy hormones have him crying at the drop of a hat these days when he rarely cried before. Bucky can only remember seeing it once, on the night that the three of them bonded, and even then it was hardly more than watery eyes. “And tell your stupid husband to go fuck himself, too.”

“My stupid husband?” Bucky scoffs, backing out of the driveway and onto the street. “I believe he is our stupid husband.”

“He’s yours when he’s making me cry with his dumb sappy face.”

Bucky reaches over the center console to take Tony’s hand, running his thumb across his knuckles soothingly. “I’ll be sure to tell him that you think his face is dumb.”

“And to go fuck himself.”

Bucky bites his lip to keep the laugh in, nodding, “And to go fuck himself. Of course, honey. I’ll let him know.”

Tony wipes at his cheeks again, using his sleeve to soak up the last of them, and he sniffles a few times to clear his nose. 

Bucky almost asks him if he’s alright, but then he remembers the last time he did that after an unexpected bout of crying and it started all over again. So instead, he lifts their joined hands and kisses the back of Tony’s to make him smile. 

They drive in comfortable silence, and Tony seems completely fine again by the time they reach the Ikea. His mood goes even higher the closer they get to the food court, and Bucky grins at the satisfaction on Tony’s face when he finally gets to have his pancakes. His moan at the first bite is almost obscene, and his eyes flutter shut in bliss. 

“Should I leave you two alone?” Bucky jokes, sipping on his orange juice. “I feel like I’m intruding on a private moment.”

“Remember that thing Steve was doing to you last night with his tongue? I guarantee this is better than that,” Tony says, and Bucky almost chokes on his juice. He glances around them, but no one seems to overheard the comment.

“I don’t know, you weren’t on the receiving end of that, babe.”

“And you’ve never had a pregnancy craving satisfied before. Morgan and I are very happy over here.”

Bucky smiles at the use of the name they recently decided on. Between the three of them, it felt like they might never find one they were all happy with. Every time two of them agreed, the third would inevitably hate it and exercise their veto power, which might have been the worst idea in history. Morgan was the first that no one hated, and when Steve put his hands on Tony’s baby bump and said the name, her enthusiastic kick ended any further debate. 

The topic of the last name has been avoided completely so far, but Steve and Bucky already privately agreed that they want her to have Tony’s alone, no matter which one of them ends up being the biological father. 

“We should look at stuff for the nursery while we’re here,” Bucky suggests. 

So far, the room only has the staple pieces of furniture: a crib, changing table, and an antique rocking chair for the corner. The walls are a pale shade of gray, and Steve is working on painting pastel flowers onto them. 

Tony nods, swallowing his large mouthful before saying, “She needs one of those giant stuffed bear things.”

Bucky raises an eyebrow, “Did she tell you this herself?”

Tony laughs and flicks a piece of fruit at him, which Bucky manages to catch and pop into his mouth. “Yes, she did. She’ll be very upset if we go home without one.”

“Well, we can’t have that, now can we?”

Tony finishes the rest of his food, and Bucky takes care of clearing the trash and plates. Grabbing his hand, Tony drags him through the store until they reach the kids section, where he proceeds to practically coo at every cute thing. Bucky can’t blame him for it, though, because he’s feeling a little overwhelmed watching his pregnant omega hold a rattle shaped like a giraffe for their daughter. 

Tony finds the giant bear he was talking about, and Bucky agrees immediately that it’s a necessity, even without Tony turning his wide, pleading eyes on him. 

He picks it up, saying, “Steve is going to kill us when he sees that our house looks like an Ikea exploded in it.”

“He’ll kill you,” Tony corrects, smiling as he strokes his hand over the swell of his stomach. “I’m protected by Morgan.”

“Damn, you’re right,” Bucky says, but it doesn’t stop him from picking up the nightlight that’s shaped like a flower. “She needs this, too.”

Tony grins, “Absolutely she does.”

Bucky’s arms get piled full of baby items. Blankets, bibs, a bath towel with a hood, toys, and stuffed animals that he struggles to see over top of on the way to the register. Tony guides him with one hand on his elbow so he doesn’t trip over anything. 

They end up filling three large blue bags, and Bucky carries all of them to the car, rejecting Tony’s offer of taking one of them. He loads them into the trunk, turning to see Tony’s smiling face when he closes it, and he can’t resist pulling him into a kiss right there in a parking lot. 

When they break apart, he leans down and presses a kiss to the top of the bump. “Baby girl, you are going to be so incredibly spoiled,” he sighs. 

“She’ll be happy,” Tony says, and his eyes are wet again. 

Bucky nods, kissing the omega’s cheek and repeating, “She’ll be happy.”

[sarah-writes-marvel]

The Quiet Storm: Avengers x fem!Reader/ Bucky x fem!Reader

S.S.: little something I wrote at 3 Am. Kinda based off personal experience. If you want me to edit it so the story is gender nuetral let me know! Id be happy to do it but for now I’m going to post this! Hope you like it.

Warning: Depressive and Anxiety tendencies/ feelings. Could possibly be triggering so please proceed with caution. Major angst and a fluff ending

Word count: 1884

MASTERLIST

-----------------------------------------------------

The sound of my alarm continuously played as I laid on my back staring at my plain white ceiling. I could tell that today was going to be rough. The feeling of the weight of the world on my shoulders. The need to cry but no intention of passing the emotion. Everything is blurring together.

My alarm started to play the rhythmic and annoying tone again before I rolled over and silenced it. Even the smallest of movements took too much of my energy.

I sat up, my comforter billowing around me, as I ran my fingers through my tangled hair and stretched my aching muscles. That always happened, my body complaining after not being able to sleep. 

I sat in that spot for a moment more, staring at my wall, when a loud knock came to my door. I barely bother to respond, just letting out a hum loud enough for the person on the other side to hear.

“Breakfast will be ready soon. Get up lazy bones!” Steve’s unmistakable voice traveled through the door, barely reaching my ears. 

Running my hands over my face again before moving to get out of bed. Numb, that’s an appropriate word to use today. Numb to my surroundings. Not caring about the world around me.

My reflection stared back at me in the mirror of my bathroom. She wasn’t recognizable. Her eyes were dark and puffy, from the hours of unrest. Her skin was oddly pale, almost blinding against her oversized red pajama shirt that she had “borrowed” from one the boys. Her hair parted to the side, laying messily against her shoulder. Her usually bright eyes seemed to be grey and lifeless. The girl that was staring back at me is just a shell of a person. 

That familiar lump formed in my throat and tears stung at my eyes but didn’t dare fall down my cheeks. Instead my shaking hands wiped at my eyes roughly trying to hide the unwanted emotion.

“Stop. You don’t have any reason to feel like this.” I critiqued the girl in the mirror.

The faucet ran cold water, pooling in my hands before I splashed it onto my face. 

The hand towel was rough against my skin as I wiped away the drops, tossing the cloth next to the sink before turning off the light and leaving my room.

I could hear the laughter of the team down the hall as I approached the kitchen. A sudden feeling of dread came over me. The realization that I can't pull off the strong facade that I usually wear. The thought that I'm too weak for this life crossed my mind.

They all sat around the dining table, a display of food in the center. Pancakes, eggs, bacon, juice, fruits, muffins, the whole 9 yards. Yet none of it was appealing. Even the thought of eating brought an odd taste to my mouth. 

“Hey! Sleeping beauty finally joined us!” Tony joked as he leaned back in his seat, his glass of juice in his hand.

Good morning greetings bombarded me as I took the empty seat between Sam and Bucky. Purely intentional by Steve knowing neither would cause a riot with me in the way. I’m always in the way. 

The empty plate at my spot seemed to stare back at me, waiting for it to be filled with food. The sudden feeling of a hand on my shoulder brought me from my staring competition.

“What can I serve up for ya babe?” Sam asked, his pet name falling to deaf ears.

“Uh, I uh-“ my eyes scanned the table again, the panic rising in my chest. ‘God just make a decision. It’s not hard!’ 

“We’ve got pretty much anything.” He gestured to the layout.

“Just some fruit and a muffin.'' I voiced quietly, sulking against the back of my chair. “ Please.”

“That's it? Don’t you have training today?” Sam questioned as he reached for a muffin and grabbed the fruit bowl from Nat. A sudden tightness was in my chest, the realization that I, in fact, do have training later.

“I- uh I forgot I had training.” I admitted quietly, my hand covering my eyes as the hanging lights began to overwhelm my sight.

“That’s alright. How about some eggs and bacon too. It’ll be a good meal.” Nat suggested. I only nodded not trusting my voice, feeling the anxiety rise in my chest. 

Sam scooped the scrambled eggs onto my plate next to muffin and fruit he had placed there only a few minutes ago, garnishing it with two strips of bacon. 

Though it wasn’t much, it was still daunting. I picked up my fork and prodded the food. I could feel the eyes of a few people watching me as I eventually stabbed a cube of fruit, bringing it to my mouth. Even the sweetest fruit tasted bland. 

The conversation that had paused once I came into the room had resumed as I continued to pick away at the food on my plate, moving it around to seem as if I ate more than I had. I could still feel a pair of eyes watching me. I set my fork onto my plate trading it for the glass of juice set at my place, trying to steady the shake in my hands. I leaned back in my chair and sipped at my drink as I scanned for the pair of eyes that were still trained on me. 

I met the curious stare of Bucky before he could turn to look at his own plate of food, shoving a bite of pancakes into his mouth. I turned my gaze back to my scattered plate, the conversation droning out as my vision blurred, dissociating from reality, yet the pressure in my chest still there. 

The oddly familiar sound of my name was called out before I focused back in.

“Hmm?” I looked up to see everyone watching me.

“Are you ok?” Tony asked, his eyes squinting as if it would help him see through my lie.

“Mhmm,” I murmured one response, setting down my glass and picking my fork back up. 

“Ok, well we asked if you were opposed to a team dinner tonight? You know out on the town?” Nat cut in.

“Ya that’s fine.” I answered pushing my food around again. Of course a night out would be amazing, maybe it would lift this invisible weight from my chest. Yet the sound of being around people sounded exhausting. To be dressed up, smiling, laughing, talking… it was all too much. But I had already said it was fine, no turning back.

‘You would be an awful friend to back out right after you said yes’ the thought crossed my mind as I shoved a piece of egg across my plate.

‘You’re already awful, but that would wreck everything completely’

‘You’re not good enough to be here. You don’t deserve these people in your life.’

‘Your not enough. You just weigh them down.’

The thoughts burying my rational reasoning as they continued to grow. My fork clacked against my plate as I took the dish and my cup to the sink, taking the muffin off before dumping the rest into the garbage and placing the dishware into the sink. I grabbed the muffin before walking out of the kitchen without another word and back to my room. 

The door shut quietly behind me as I put the untouched muffin onto my night stand. I crawled under the covers, my back towards the door as I huddled under the comforter hoping to block out the thoughts. 

The silence was deafening. The thoughts were loud and overpowering as they continued to enter my mind, questioning my purpose on this team of superhumans, my purpose in life... questioning why I was alive at all. 

A single tear and a sniffle escaped my being breaking the silence of the room. The sound of my door knob turning and clicking added to the noise.

“Y/N?” I could hear the concern in Buckys voice. Why would he be concerned about a nobody like me? 

I felt the bed dip and the gentle pressure of his hand on my arm through the comforter. A simple hum came from my mouth, acknowledging his presence next to me.

“Nat just wanted me to let you know that she can’t train with you today. She said to take the day off.” His voice was soft, as if he raised it just slightly it would break me. And i’m sure he wasn’t far from wrong.

“Ok.” the small word came out broken and timid.

The deafening silence fell on the room again. The sound of Bucky's deep breaths and my own labored breaths were the only noise that filled the air.

“Do you need to talk?” the question broke the silence. I shook my head, unsure if he even saw it. “Do you want me to go?” another shake of my head. “Can I lay down next to you?” A nod. A shift in the bed. Quiet.

“I don’t know what’s wrong.” I admit quietly. Another tear slid over the bridge of my nose.

“Nothing has to be wrong to not feel right.”

I turned over, facing him. He was propped up by a few pillows, his arm crossed over his chest, his eyes scanning my room before looking at me. 

“Come here doll.” his arms opened wide motioning me to come closer.

I laid my head against his broad chest, the sound of his heartbeat soothing my aching soul. The feeling of his arms tightening over my back as I rest my own around his waist.

“It’s gonna be ok.” He whispered, placing a kiss in my hair. “Maybe not now or today or this week but it’ll be ok.” 

The tears broke through the dam, choked sobs coming from my mouth as Bucky's grip tightened around me.

“I don’t wanna wait anymore.” I confess through ragged breaths, my heart rate picking up.

“Hey hey, shhh. I need you to breathe, doll.” his voice was so gentle, trying to calm the raging storm of built up emotions that were crashing through the surface of my being. His hand rubbing curled on my back as his metal arm tightened just a little more.

A few more tears slipped across my face dampening a spot on Bucky's henley. My breathing slowly reverting to normal.

“There we go. that’s it. Deep breaths.” Bucky coached, continuously rubbing my back.

“i‘m sorry.” I mumbled wiping the mess from my face.

“Don’t apologize. You don’t need to.” 

My hand gripped the fabric of his henley, his hand still rubbing my back, his heartbeat grounding me. A vibration ran through his chest as the tune of a song echoed quietly in the room. My eyes flutter shut as his baritone voice hummed out a tune. I slipped into the unconsciousness still listening to him.

His humming paused for a moment, a kiss placed on my head. “Please don’t think you aren’t good enough. You are more worthy than any of us. Don’t leave me, doll.”

--------------

S.S.: let me know what you think! also let me know hwich perspective you prefer: first second or thrid person? (i, you, or him/her/them)

ps.:::::: sorry I just found a few mistakes so I fixed them.. sorry to those who already read it with those in there!!

[themculibrary]

Meet Ugly Masterlist

Links Last Checked: September 2nd, 2024

Acceptance (ao3) - Judy_The_Dreamer, Trashcanakin bruce/darcy T, 31k

Summary: Darcy was about ninety percent certain that she never wanted to meet any of her soulmates. All three of them had left their unique mark on her, some more horrifying than others. The romance was well and truly dead before it had even started. Good thing working for the Avengers and wrangling scientists is more than enough to keep a girl busy. Especially since the most dangerous of the lot poses such an enticing mystery...

Found: One Bicycle (ao3) - daisymondays steve/bucky T, 8k

Summary: Bucky Barnes posted in Overheard at Middlebury College:

Hello fellow students! Basically in my drunken stupor last night I came across a bicycle. Being rather intoxicated and far from home I decided the logical thing to do was ride it back. I can assure you all that both me and the bike survived this adventure and are in perfect condition!! I now however have no use for for said vehicle and have realised that someone is probably pretty upset about having lost it. Anyway, if you can correctly identify the bike’s make and colour, slide into my DMs and I promise to return it to you!! Thanks for the ride xoxo

Home Is Wherever I'm With You (ao3) - cydonic steve/bucky E, 88k

Summary: This is what happens when you buy a house to flip having only seen the online images: you get more than you bargained for. Bucky Barnes brings all the tools to handle a dilapidated home, but he's hardly prepared for a smart-mouthed child (with poor aim), a crying baby, and the hottest dad he's ever seen in his life living right next door.

That House-Flipper!AU.

I Know Your Type (ao3) - emphasisonem steve/bucky M, 5k

Summary: “You don’t know-” the brunet growls, and it sends a frisson of heat through Steve’s body. “The first thing about me.”

Steve opens his mouth to respond, but the words die in his throat as the brunet claims his lips in a fierce kiss. Steve has every intention of pushing him away when his hands reach up to the broad chest before him, but instead he finds himself curling his fingers into the fabric of the other man’s shirt and pulling him closer.

In which Steve and Bucky get off on the wrong foot.

Insomniac Support Group (ao3) - rememberednoah steve/bucky T, 2k

Summary: In which Bucky and Sam both have insomnia and are in an insomniac support group. In which Sam drags Steve (the asshole who sleeps perfectly fine during the night) with him to a meeting and Steve dutifully and accidentally falls asleep. In which Bucky attempts to kill Steve (aka glares at Steve until he wakes up and then proceeds to glare at him more).

It's a Secret No One Knows (ao3) - Dresupi darcy/pietro T, 4k

Summary: Where first impressions can be detrimental. And it takes some people longer to warm up to their soulmates than others.

Especially when both people are arrogant little spitfires.

Somewhere Between a Rock and a Hard Place (ao3) - MassiveSpaceWren, mortenavida bucky/tony M, 23k

Summary: Shadow and Iron have been online gaming friends for years but never met.

Bucky Barnes just got a temporary contract to work at Stark Industries and he absolutely hates his new boss.

The two have a lot more in common than originally thought.

Steve Rogers: Architect (ao3) - loonietuna steve/bucky E, 10k

Summary: “Why would he actively try and fuck up a building that he and his men are constructing? You really that narcissistic to think the guy is giving blood, sweat, and tears just to fuck up your project?” Sam asks incredulously.

“Every time Sam, without fail, every time I go to that site something is wrong, or something is being built that wasn’t in my fucking plans. I can’t go to the site every day and watch over his shoulder, I’ve got other buildings going up!” Steve sighs, throwing his hands up. Steve was fortunate enough to hit the ground running after school and has become one of the youngest architect to achieve his level of success – a level that warrants him being contracted by Tony Stark personally to work on his namesake – so Steve can’t fuck this up.

More importantly, Steve can’t let Barnes fuck this up.

the world collapses into you (ao3) - maikurosaki steve/bucky M, 123k

Summary: Bucky Barnes has two jobs, works seventy hours a week, and raises his sisters since their parents’ death four years ago. He is exhausted, stressed, and constantly worried. He doesn’t have the time or patience for anyone’s crap. Too bad Captain America didn’t get the memo.

When Bucky unexpectedly meets Steve Rogers, it’s mutual dislike at first sight. In fact, Bucky decides straight away that Rogers is a self-righteous bastard and hopes never to see his face again. Unfortunately, life has a way of mocking Bucky’s plans.

Visiting Hours are Nine to Forever (ao3) - Tahlruil clint/tony T, 17k

Summary: Look, Clint didn't mean to hit the guy, it just sort of happened. He was distracted, and the guy was distracted, and then things were a little bit out of his control. And even if it wasn't completely his fault, he still feels pretty bad about it. He had to go see the guy, didn't he? It was only polite, so yeah. He'd do that.

And look, he doesn't mean to start fake dating his accident victim either, but sometimes life is weird that way. You just gotta go with the flow when it happens, and learn to be the best fake boyfriend ever.

Wait and Hope (ao3) - monobuu bucky/tony, steve/natasha G, 5k

Summary: Tony meets a handsome man outside a coffee shop and it’s everything you might imagine in a stereotypical meet-cute. Until the man opens his mouth.

What Would You Do? (ao3) - MonalisaMontauk steve/bucky T, 1k

Summary: Bucky Barnes is an actor for the Reality TV Show "What Would You DO?" Bucky and the lovely Sharon Carter are filming a segment on Street harassment/catcalling. Bucky doesn't expect a feisty blonde headed guy to defend Sharon's honor by punching him. He just might be a little in love.

You got me banging on the wall (ao3) - sassystuckystan steve/bucky E, 7k

Summary: Bucky's next door neighbor, while being the pinnacle of sex, is singlehandedly the most annoying and frustrating man on the planet. Naturally, Bucky's dick is very interested. Throw in a dash of internships, mild voyeurism, and traitorous roommates, you have a recipe for an all-out war.

or, Bucky really needs to get laid but a semi-hate fuck would also suffice.

You've Cat To Be Kitten Me (ao3) - thelilacfield wanda/vision T, 27k

Summary: “What’s up, neighbour?”

“My cat is pregnant."

“Congratulations, grandpa!”

“And I found your cat with her on Halloween, after you summarily informed me you would turn the music down and proceeded not to. Is your cat neutered?”

“Oh shit.”

[angstsfordays]

A Lot Like Love

Summary: Six months into joining the Avengers, you had your first clash with Steve Rogers. A prequel to Stay With Me.

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Avenger!Reader, Bucky x Reader (Platonic)

Warnings: FLUFF. ANGST. FEELINGS. A few bad words.

Word count: 6k-ish

Notes: I’m back with another Steve Rogers fic! I don’t know how I always easily write over 6k and I sometimes wonder if its too much! Honestly, I’m hoping to write more but I have been stuck with a writer’s block. Several ideas and draft were made but I can’t seem to follow through. Hope you will forgive me as I navigate this through! 😭

This story took me weeks as I felt it was not good enough but I managed to write a version that I liked. Hope you will do too! If you haven’t checked it out, I wrote a Dad!Steve story called No, Mama. Check out my masterlist too! 🥰

 Leave a like, reblog or comment to let me know what you think! 💖

———————————————————————

“I’m very disappointed in you, Y/N. I expected more from you.”

His words were laced with frustration. Your face scrunched up as you tried to prevent yourself from crying.

You wanted to show that you deserved a place among the ranks of the Avengers. Afterall, you had come to idolise Steve Rogers ever since you entered the academy and grew an admiration for the hero under the influence of your then mentor, Phil Coulson.

However, you have soon come to learn that the perfect image of the Captain changed when you got to work under directly.

You heard about how much of a hard ass he could be from Bucky and Sam. Steve Rogers had rules when it came to managing his team and expects his team members to follow his instructions closely. In your ignorant bliss, you believed that he was just acting like any other leader.

It was a mission targeting a rogue scientific facility that decided to engage in human experimentation involving missing and homeless people. The catalyst for this mission came from a sharp increase in missing reports. The local authorities believed it was out of their league to engage this facility given that it was backed by an influential figure.

The goal was to save those under captivity and hopefully arrest the mastermind behind this cruel act of humanity. A majority of the team was deployed with Steve, Bucky, Natasha, Sam, Wanda and yourself.

Sam, Wanda and you were placed on the team to bring the captives out while the Steve, Bucky and Natasha were tasked to take out security and secure data that could aid in finding who’s the one supporting the facility.

You were informed that everyone was held accounted for and that everyone can proceed to board the jet. The woman you held in your arms was still trembling as you moved to escort her to the Quinjet meant to transport the captives.

Her sobbing intensified as you started to feel her weakly clawing at your arms while mumbling something incoherent.

“What’s wrong? Hey, breathe in, breathe out.” You tried to get her to calm down so that she can speak properly.

“There’s someone else- Jacob, they kept him in the-” The woman tried her best to tell you as she took deep breaths.

“Where did they keep him?”

“There’s an isolation room. Jacob fought back as they tried to take away one of the little ones. They placed him in solidarity confinement for that. It’s located in the west wing of the-” You heart accelerated as you took in the information.

You knew that there was plans to burn the facility to the ground. You overheard one of the guards giving instructions to another before Natasha shot him.

“Everybody out, we’re done here.” Steve came into your view as he overlooked at the captives being escorted into the Quinjet.

“Please, he’s a young boy himself too. No more than 18 years old.” The woman pleaded with you. You nodded in response to show that you understood her worries and you made to move.

“Follow the rest back to the jet. I will get him.” Reassuring her once more, you took off into a sprint and allow your powers to push you off the ground in long strides towards the direction of the crumbling building.

“Y/N! What are you doing?!” You could hear Steve screaming after you. Pressing into your earpiece, you told him that there was one more person to save.

You could hear your comrades persuading you to stop as you see the whole building ablaze on fire.

“Y/N!” Steve shouting with both frustration and desperation, asked you to turn back but you ignored his instructions for the first time ever.

Hoping your instincts were right, you rushed to the west wing of the building. There were debris everywhere and you had to conjure a shield from your energy-based powers to protect yourself.

Your eyes lit up and seeing a plain door with a small peep hole.

“Jacob!” You called out, hoping that you got the right one and made to blow the door off its hinges before kicking it down.

You saw Jacob covered in soot from the flames and he was seen to be gasping for air, presumably from the inhalation of smoke. His hands reached out to you feebly and you pulled him closer under your protection.

“Captain, I found him.” You pressed into your earpiece.

“We will be there to extract the both of you.” His reassuring voice allowed you to take a breath as you cradled Jacob in protection. The oncoming debris alerted you that the building was going to fall and you might be buried underneath it. Frantically looking around for an exit, you knew the door you came in from was not an option.

As the four walls came crashing down, you let your powers engulfed you and Jacob in a protective bubble. You weren’t sure how long you could hold it out as you felt the impact of debris falling.

The call of your name brought you out of your temporary prayer and you could hear Wanda on the other side of the wall. You weren’t sure what happened next but when you opened your eyes, you saw that you were on the grassy ground not far from the facility.

Your senses alerted you of another impending explosion, thus you quickly shielded yourself from the impact by projecting a tranquilizing barrier to soften the impact of the blast. The next moment was a daze as you felt your face meeting the fresh grass. In a state of blur, you could sense yourself being lifted off the ground and carried into someone’s arms.

Your eyelids were heavy while you struggled to open them. The last thing you remembered was a voice calling out your name.

———————��———————————————

You were jolted awake but all you see was darkness. That was when you realised that your eyes were not opened and you were only subconsciously awake.

You willed yourself to open your eyes but the bright line that pierced into your sight had you closing them immediately. Waiting a few more seconds, you slowly tried again and blinked to adjust to the light.

The next thing that your senses picked up was the beeping of a monitor. Then came the aches in your body. Letting out a groan, you slowly wriggled to move your muscles. Within the next minute, you managed to sit up.

You realised that you were in the medical wing of the compound. Flurried footsteps were heard as Dr Cho came into view. She started fussing around to check for your vitals. You were still in a blurry state of mind and only started to focus when she called your name.

“Y/N, how are you feeling?”

A groan answered her question as you held one side of your head.

“I suspect some traumatic aftershock from the blast but you seemed alright everywhere else. You’re lucky.”

“That’s my middle name.” You kidded as you saw your friends filing in the room. Dr Cho informed them of your condition and you could see the relieved expressions on their faces when they were told that you were mostly alright.

You blinked several times and saw Wanda came to sit by you, petting your head in a comforting gesture. You leaned in her warmth and had your head on her shoulder. Natasha came to sit on your other side and held one of your hands in hers.

“I will keep her under observation for a day.” Dr Cho informed before walking out of the room. Once she was gone, all attention was back on you.

“That was ballsy of you, kid.” Tony quipped as he gave you a once over. His heart dropped when he was informed that you lost consciousness in the field while working in the lab.

You gave him a mock salute and grinned in response.

“I don’t think you should be joking, Y/N. You almost got yourself killed.” Steve Roger’s voice took your attention. Oh boy, he looked fuming in his signature crossed arms pose.

“Hey, all that matters is that she’s okay.” Bucky interjected, sensing Steve’s bad mood. He looked over Steve with a concerned expression before moving to yours to show support.

“I did what I had to do, Captain.” Brows furrowed, you did not understand why Steve had to take that tone.

“No, I gave you clear instructions to come back. Instead, you just ran head straight into a blazing fire.” Steve pressed on in a reprimanding tone.

“She was just trying to the right thing, Steve. Anyone of us would have tried to do the same.” Sam tried to speak up on your behalf. Everyone was now alert of the hostility emanating from the Captain.

They knew Steve could have a temper if he wanted but what they didn’t know was why he seemed more bothered than usual. Everyone had made several mistakes in the field from time to time, but Steve never took it to heart. He overlooked them quickly and just reminded to do better next time.

It seemed that Steve was more affected this time round. Steve then asked for everyone to clear your room so he could speak to you alone.

Everyone started filing out, Bucky and Sam gave you worried looks while Wanda and Natasha gave you pats on your shoulders. Tony, being the nosy king he is, wanted to stay to see what happens next but was swiftly ushered out by Natasha. Vision who came to visit tried to give you a reassuring look to which you responded with a slight smile.

You didn’t see what the point was when the walls were made of glass and everyone could still what was going on. Once Steve saw the last person out and the door closed, he spoke up.

“We could have come up with a plan instead of rushing into a burning building that’s about to collapse any minute!”

“There was no time for a plan. I could do it! I’m trained for this!” You retorted in your defense. You believed you made the right call, how could you not take any action when you knew someone needed saving.

“I was an agent before I was an Avenger. I knew the risks!” You added onto your argument to justify your actions.

“Sometimes we cannot save everyone, Y/N. It’s not worth the risk!” Hearing Steve’s words riled something up in you. For the first time, you forgo the idolised image you had of him and saw him as a stubborn and unreasonable person.

“It’s worth trying! And I did it!”

“Have you thought of what everyone felt? Have you thought of what I felt when I see you running into the burning building? The odds may not always be in your favour.” Steve decided to take strides towards the end of your bed.

“Well, I beat the odds? Didn’t I?” As you were still sitting down on your bed, you craned your head to look up at him. You returned his intense glare with your own. Steve couldn’t believe your defiant words and he felt his temper reaching a boiling point.

“Don’t make excuses for your reckless behaviour. You should have listened to me!”.

“I’m sorry I don’t listen when I think something is unreasonable.” Your words came out cold and you heard the gasps from some of the team outside of the room.

Everyone couldn’t believe the exchange happening in front of them. Your sudden attitude change towards Steve caught them by surprise as well Steve’s display of temperament. In the time they know you, they known you were polite and respectful to Steve and they had always known Steve to be mild-tempered.

“You think asking you to stay away from your impending death is unreasonable?” Steve spoke calmly but in a way that showed restraint from bursting.

“You would have done the same, Captain. Ironic for someone who once marched into a fully armed Hydra camp solo.” If your previous words from before didn’t serve to tip Steve over the edge, your last one did. Steve’s eyes widened at your remarks as if he couldn’t believe you said that.

“Suspension from the field till I say so. Until then, I hope you’re looking forward to paperwork, Y/L/N.” Gritting your teeth in anger, you also started to feel the unexpected tears welling up in your eyes.

“I’m very disappointed in you, Y/N. I expected more from you.”

Ouch, those words hit you like a bullet train. What’s more, it came from Steve- someone you respected and admired.

You tried to blink them away and looked down on the surface of your bed. You knew you were close to tears and balled up your fists to stop yourself from losing your emotions. Opening your mouth, you were sure that you wanted to make another retorted but was surprised when nothing came out.

You looked out to the needle in your hand connecting to the IV drip. Reaching out, you pulled it out with the little strength you had. Steve was shocked to see what you were doing and his next sentence came out in a concerned tone compared to his previous stern one.

“What are you doing?”

You briefly ignored him as you got your legs off the bed. Setting them down gently, you made sure you had your bearings and stood up gingerly. You took a few steps to warm up your sore muscles.

Steve’s hands came up to rest on your arms and you looked up to his eyes full of bewilderment at your actions. You shrugged them off and returned a cold stare back, you then tried to move around him.

“Hey, where do you think you are going-”

“Oh, am I supposed to report my every location to you now?” You answered sarcastically. You made your way to press the button to open the glass door of your ward.

“I can leave, Y/N. You need to rest!” Steve was clearly flustered by what you were doing. He knew he crossed the line on his remarks but he was still concerned about your well-being.

You spoke up as the door opened to your friends staring on in disbelief.  

“Come on Tony, let’s order cheeseburgers and fries.”

You were apathetic to the reactions of everyone and especially one in particular as you tried to walk off in the direction of the kitchens, faking a strong front when really you were broken inside.

Steve Rogers can go piss himself.

———————————————————————

You recovered faster than expected but were restricted to less strenuous activities for at least a week by Dr Cho.

This only meant a week of boredom as you struggled to occupy your free time. You were worried how you were going to get around the compound with the possibility of coming into contact with Steve at any moment’s notice.

However, when Natasha told you that Steve was going on the follow up mission to apprehend the mastermind behind the science facility, you heaved a sigh of relief. Natasha and Sam were also tasked to go along with him as well.

Luckily, you still had Bucky, Wanda and Vision to keep you company. Tony made sure to stop by when he comes into the compound with your favourite takeout, he thought he could make up for Steve’s harshness on his part.

You told your friends about Steve’s ‘punishment’ and were genuinely concerned at its implementation. Taking you out of the field was one of the worst punishments for you. If you do not work in the field, then what kind of Avenger could you be? Plus, you hated paperwork the most. They always gave you a migraine.

In Steve’s absence, you were free to roam around as per normal. You went about your usual routine of catching up with your shows and just chilling with your friends.

You went out shopping with Wanda one day, the next you had engaged Vision in the fun of board games specifically the ‘Game of Life’ and you also played video games with Bucky the day after.

However, your momentarily bliss ended on your fourth day of rest when footsteps entered the common game room.

“Oh come on Bucky! You can do so much better!” You stated as Bucky tried to keep up with the steps on ‘Just Dance’.

“I don’t know why I let you rope me into this.” Your friend grumbled like an old man (which was befitting of his age) as he started shaking his hips awkwardly in accordance to the character on the TV screen.

“I’m helping you to keep up with the times! What better way through dance!” You countered his remark as you did a body wave.

“You’re lucky Sam’s not here, otherwise I would never-” Bucky spoke as he chuckled at your remark but he was not able to finish when he got interrupted.

“What the f-” The recognition of Sam’s voice had you pausing your game momentarily. You turned around to face what you would expect to be Sam only, but your eyes widened like a deer caught in headlights at who else you saw.

You froze in your actions and looked over to Bucky who looked equally mortified. Both of you were panicking for different reasons.

“Friday, you got that on camera?” Sam started balling over at how he witnessed the usual stone-cold Bucky dancing. Bucky dancing like a modern millennial?! Sam grinned like a Cheshire cat.  

You started blinking nervously as you craned your head to see Bucky positively fuming and you could even detect Bucky growling.

“Hey! That’s not nice, Sam! Bucky was just accompanying me because I was bored.” You tried to intervene as you placed a hand on Bucky’s arm to reassure him.

“But did you see his moves, I mean-”

“Bored? Didn’t you start on the paperwork I assigned you?” Steve’s voice cut into the conversation like a knife. The atmosphere in the air suddenly shifting towards a tense one. You looked down on the floor to avoid answering Steve’s question.

“I’m still resting from the previous mission. Dr Cho’s orders.” You formulated an answer after a moment of silence.

“Clearly.” The hint of sarcasm in Steve’s voice was unmissed by everyone in the room, proving to further embarrass you than you already are.

“You can start on collating the report from the previous mission.” Taking a nervous gulp down your throat, you looked over at Bucky who eyed you sympathetically and then over to Sam who kept quiet.

Even he knew when to read the room when Steve was putting on his captain hat.

You begrudgingly dragged yourself to the level where the open office is. With Friday’s help, you retrieved the documents that you needed to kickstart the report that Steve assigned you. You began to work while listening to your music playlist and soon find yourself immersed in the zone.

The music in your ear pods was blasting in such high volume to drown out your surroundings that you could not hear Friday calling for your attention. Your jerked in your seat when you felt a tap on your shoulder and looked over to see Bucky.

Taking out your ear pods, you paused the music playing on your laptop.

“What’s up, Buck?”

“I’m calling you to come to dinner. Friday told us you have been here for six hours.” Oh, you didn’t know you had been here at your desk for that long. Looking at the time on your computer, you saw that it was already closing to half past seven in the evening.

“Come on, Wanda and Vision made dinner.” Bucky pulled you out of your chair and placed his hands on your shoulders to guide you out of the office.

“Look, Y/N-” Bucky let out a sigh as the two of you made your way to the elevator. “I’ve known Steve forever and believe me, he’s not out to get you.”

“Oh yeah, what about what happened earlier?” You asked Bucky with a defeated look while leaning your back on the wall.

“You have to understand from his perspective. Being a leader is more than just leading, a leader takes care of everyone in his team. How do you think he felt when he knew you were in danger?” Bucky’s question made you reflect and realized that you had only be thinking about yourself.

“He would have felt the worst if we lost you because you’re his responsibility.” Bucky continued while placing a comforting hand on one of your shoulders. A sense of guilt had sunk inside your heart upon listening to what Bucky said.

You awkwardly looked down on the floor as you did not know what to say. Hearing Bucky’s words, you realised that you had only been thinking about your own perspective and failed to recognise what people around could have felt.

Bucky knew you were deep in thought and reflection as you kept quiet. He felt that he wanted to explain on behalf of Steve since he believed that you might have not understood where Steve was coming from.

You weren’t the only one affected from the argument. Steve didn’t have it any better. Steve tried to conceal his emotions with neutral expressions but Bucky saw that his best friend would always perk up when your name was mentioned amongst the team for the past weeks.

Bucky saw Steve standing outside your door the day when you were cleared to go back to your room. It seemed like Steve wanted to talk to you but couldn’t bring himself to actually knock on the door. When he was caught, Steve brushed it off like he was just passing by. But Bucky knew better.

Bucky had his hands around your shoulders as he led you towards the common eating room. You could hear the voices of your friends chattering and instantly picked up the smell of lasagne inviting you to take quicker steps towards the room.

“I smell lasagne!!!” You skipped in joy towards Wanda who was letting the lasagne cool on the table. Wanda gave you a bright smile and did a small cheer dance,

Your cheery persona, however, dropped when you turned to see who was sitting at the dining table across you. Steve looked up at you with an unreadable expression as if to gauge your reaction at the sight of him.

Wearing your heart on your sleeves, you couldn’t hide your emotions when you saw him. Half of you still felt upset at Steve’s cold attitude while the other half was consumed by guilt.

“Come on, Y/N. You must be starving after doing so much paperwork.” Bucky tried to sit you down but you resisted his push. You refused to let your feet move but it was a laughable attempt when he was a super soldier and could have just easily picked you up.

You were not ready to face Steve yet as you were still uncomfortable from your previous exchange.

With your quick wit, you brought your hand up to one side of your head and crouched over in fake pain. “I’m not feeling so good, I think I’m going to head back to my room-”

“What? But Wanda made lasagne! You live and die for it!” Sam exclaimed from the side and you cringed when you realised that you had to come up with a better excuse.

“Oh, I must have gotten a migraine from all that paperwork. I think I need to lay down, I don’t think I can see-” You held yourself back before the truth came out but you peeked over and could see that Steve didn’t buy your nonsense.

 “The lights.” You tried to quickly cover up your verbal flounder. “Oh, the lights are making me dizzy.” Spinning out of Bucky’s hold, you kept up your act by muttering excuse after excuse. You tried to ignore the calls of your friends as you briskly walked back to your room without turning back.

Letting your body fall onto the comfort of your sheets, you let out a big sigh as you looked up at the ceiling. Your eyelids felt heavy as you started blinking, you knew you were worn out from just typing at your desk all day.

The next moment you woke up, it was still dark outside your window. You reached for your phone and saw that it was around midnight. The grumbling in your stomach served to remind you that you haven’t had dinner.

You made to wash up first before making your way to the kitchens. Friday had informed you that everyone had retired to your rooms. Knowing that you were alone, you walked with ease in search for food.

Your eyes spotted something at the table and saw that Wanda had left you a portion of dinner. Putting it in the microwave to heat up, you took your phone out to find something to watch while you ate dinner.

You propped your phone up against a tissue box and dug into your dinner. The comfort food made you feel good and you went over to the fridge to grab a bottle of beer.

Engrossed in the video playing in front of you, you didn’t realise someone in the shadows who was watching you giggle at something funny playing on your phone.

———————————————————————

Steve regretted the way the words came out of his mouth. He was supposed to check if you were alright after the incident but he was taken aback by the turn of events.

Normally, you were polite and respectful towards him. You two had friendly exchanges but he could tell you were more comfortable with the rest of the team.

It riled him up when you challenged him and refused to admit your mistakes. You did not realise how worried everyone was when you ran ahead to the burning building. The panic rose when there were the minutes of silence that followed after he tried to comms you.

Everyone in the team looked to each other in worry and were at a lost on what to do. Steve brought Wanda and Bucky over to the supposed location where you might be at. The two looked over Steve for his next instructions.

Your voice coming up on everyone’s ear piece was an answered prayer when he knew you were safe. Steve got Wanda to blast a hole in the side of the wall. That’s when he saw you huddling over the young boy, using your own body to shield him while extending one hand to conjure an energy-based force to protect from fire and debris.

Wanda used her powers to bring both of you out and settled you on the ground. Even to the last moment, you mustered the last bit of energy to increase the projection of your shield and received the last brunt of the blast from the explosion.

That’s when you collapsed back onto the ground. Steve immediately went to pick you up while Bucky helped the young boy. Your eyes were half closed as Steve could see that you tried to stay awake but eventually fatigue must have gotten the best of you.

“Y/N!” Steve tried calling out you to ensure that you were alright. Holding you securely bridal style, Steve made sure to bring you back to the jet fast.

Steve’s memory then went back to the moment where you looked like you were crying. In his fit of anger after you dared to talk back for the first time, he decided to throw out a punishment to put you in your place.

Steve didn’t realise the impact of his words when you stared back with glossy eyes. You had an unreadable expression but Steve was sure you were upset. When you reached out to take out your IV drip, Steve panicked at your sudden actions.

He tried to stop you from leaving, he knew that you were still weak considering that you were knocked out for a whole day. When you said you couldn’t stand to be around Steve, Steve swore his heart sunk for a moment.

How were you able to have such an effect on him?

Then you walked out of your ward, asking Tony to order cheeseburgers. Steve didn’t know whether to scoff or laugh at that moment. Of course, you will do that after waking up from losing consciousness in the field.

When Steve walked into you and Bucky dancing, he started to experience a strange feeling. What could possibly be an endearing sight didn’t sit well with him. Steve saw how happy you were in Bucky’s company and how Bucky looked the same.

Steve knew Bucky rarely acted so carefree in front of others but always somehow looked visibly relaxed in your presence. He always known you two had got along well but somehow the sight in front of Steve only made him feel bitter.

Why do you keep everyone close but only him at bay? Steve’s hopes for you were only further dashed when you decided to skip dinner, knowing that you had to be in the same room as him. Did he really made you hate him that much?

Steve only wanted what’s best for you, he thought he could had lost you in the fire. When he saw you could still joke around after almost tossing your life aside, an anger started building inside him. How could you still be so cheerful when he was here worried sick about you?

When Steve saw you eating dinner alone past midnight, his heart sunk at the sight. He didn’t want you to hide from him forever. Yes, it’s fine if you do not want to see him but you should not be deprived from being around the rest of team.

The next week had you finishing reports and helping out with other people’s paperwork. You were positive that you were going to break down from the sheer boredom of it all.

You decided to bring your laptop around to do your work instead of being bounded by your desk. This got you to be creative in the many spaces you can choose to work in among the large grounds of the compound. The only condition was that Steve was not going to be there.

You began with working in the common room but it was too lonely with everyone else to do their own things in the afternoon.

You then moved to occupying a small desk in Tony’s lab. You found his company enjoyable as you tried to multi-task between typing and gossiping. However, when one of Tony’s experiments nearly caused you to be fried by an electrical outburst, you decided to scout for another workspace.

You then crashed your team’s training room and decided to do your work in a corner of the room. You were slightly irritated when Friday informed you that you were not allowed to return to training under Steve’s orders when you entered the room.

You were positively fuming and humiliated while your friends looked at you with pitiful eyes when they heard it too.

How dare he! To think you were felt bad when you listened to Bucky’s defense of Steve. Turning your feet, you decided to leave the room when you were suddenly pushed back by a collision with a big mass.

You fumbled as you nearly dropped your laptop but someone beat you to it.

“Thank you-” You spoke gratefully before you looked up to meet the eyes of the one person you vehemently wanted to avoid.

Steve had a look of surprised as he realised that he bumped into you while you looked on at him with annoyance. Seriously, you thought Friday had told you that he was in a meeting!

“Y/N-” Steve tried to break the silent exchange but you were not having any of it.

“Jerk.” You countered in greeting before you pushed past him to walk out of the door.

Steve looked over to see his friends on the training grounds who witnessed the hostile exchange. Most of them tried to maintain neutral expressions but Bucky was the only who gave him a look that said, ‘Go after her punk!’.

You started stomping your way to the elevator so that you can return to your own room. What a bad day, you thought as you shook your head.

“Y/N!” Your ears perked up at the call of your name and you started to panic when you realised that Steve was calling after you.

Looking back, Steve was taking long strides to catch up with you. Without much thought, you didn’t know why you started to make a sprint for the elevator doors and started punching the button as if it could make it arrive faster. You really did not want to deal with him at this moment.

To your relief, the elevator came onto your floor within a few seconds and you immediately threw yourself in and asked Friday to quickly close the doors.

“Friday! Hurry up, please!” Hearing your words, Steve quickly countered your instructions.

“Friday, hold the door for me!” Your eyes widened when the seemingly closing doors started to back up and open for Steve.

“Oh come on! Friday, I asked first!” You whined when Friday informed you that Steve outranks you and hence, she had to follow his instructions instead. Why is she such a stickler?

Thinking fast, you decided that you could still exit the elevator before Steve came in.

Oh, how foolish were you to think you could outrun Steve Rogers?

You were enhanced but not one of your powers included superhuman agility. Steve grabbed you by your shoulders and nudged you back into the steel and glass box.

As the elevator started moving, there was only the sound of your panting and you thought you could burn a hole on the floor with how intensely you tried to stare down and not at Steve.

“Hey, Y/N. Please listen to me, alright. Don’t leave.” His voice was earnest and felt yourself weakened, you gave in and decided to look up into his crystal blue eyes. You swore he was staring into your soul and you realised that it was much too intense.

You tore your eyes away from his and tried to look anywhere else. Two hands then came to rest on the side of your face and held you in place.

Adrenaline was rushing through your veins at the most intimate interaction you ever had with Steve and you could hear your heart beating wildly. Taking a nervous gulp down your throat, you were waiting to see what Steve was going to do.

When Steve was sure he had your attention, he then spoke.

“Look, I’m sorry. I know I have crossed the line the other day but-” Steve suddenly paused and appeared in deep thought to continue his next sentence.

“I never want to hurt you. I never meant to. I’m just so frustrated.”

“About what?” You were surprised that you could say anything. Your arms clutched your laptop tightly to your chest as if it could act as wall between you and Steve.

“About how you can easily say that you would risk your life on a whim. Why?” Looking back at Steve with tears in your eyes, you started recalling an old memory.

“When I was a SHIELD agent, I was on a mission to save a hostage. My team took out the guards and I was supposed to get her out.”

“The guard set the place for self-destruction, they didn’t care of what they left behind. I couldn’t find her room in time. Phil pulled me out as the walls are collapsing, he knew I would be buried along with her if I didn’t get out.” Your voice came out trembling. Steve then moved his hands from your face to the sides of your shoulders, holding you close in comfort.

“I can still hear her screams, Steve. I was so close to finding her, if only I had another minute….” You looked up at him once more, a single tear falling down your cheek while you tried to refrain yourself from breaking down completely.

“If I had been faster, stronger, I could save her. She was only nine. She was abducted because she was enhanced and they were going to exploit her for her powers….” Shoulders slumped, you let yourself fall to the ground on your knees as you felt a sense of weight off your shoulders.

Steve observed you for a moment before joining you on the floor, he reached out to take your laptop from your hands and placed them on the ground.

“I’m sorry, I now understand.” Steve gathered you in his arms and you allowed yourself to return the same gesture.

As you closed your eyes, you felt several more tears falling and leaving wet spots on Steve’s sweater. You tightened your grip and you heart skipped several beats when you felt him doing the same.

“It’s not your fault, Y/N. You tried your best.” You could feel the rumble of Steve’s chest as he spoke and you sought comfort in the warmth he provided.

“You did a good job. You always do.” Steve used his thumb to wipe of the tears off your face and gave you one of his beautiful boy-ish smiles.

“I’m so glad you returned to me-us safely.” Why do you feel heat rushing to your cheeks when he said that? Why does he suddenly seem so wonderful at this moment?

Your mind started whirling at how Steve’s words and actions managed to tug at your heartstrings? What was happening?

“Lives are lost every day during the fight but I don’t know if I will take it if you were gone. You are an important member of the team.” Steve’s words stroke a chord within you and you weren’t sure of what to say in return.

You decided to nod in understanding and Steve took well to your response. What happened next took you off guard as Steve leaned in to press his lips on the side of your temple.

Steve now knew the reason behind your actions and he was angry at himself for judging you too quickly. How you managed to survive in this line of work with such softness and vulnerability baffled him.

Such emotions might be viewed as weak but Steve recognised this to be a source of strength, for you do not fight to kill but help others in need. That’s why Steve had not regretted his decision to bring you into the team, you embodied the very essence of being an Avenger.

Unknowingly to Steve yet, you also have grown to be someone important to him as well.  Someone he hoped that will stay by his side for a long time.

———————————————————————

“You know this is an infringement of privacy, right?” Natasha spoke as everyone gathered to look at the hologram screen that Tony put up in the training room. Steve and you had stood up to leave the elevator with smiles on both of your faces.

Steve had his arm around your shoulders as he led you out while you smiled adoringly at him.

Tony shrugged as he justified his actions. “Hey, had to make sure they didn’t kill each possible, am I right?”

“That’s least likely unless you are talking about these two here.” Natasha nodded to Sam and Bucky who stood side by side.

“Man, it seems I like I’m watching a romantic soap. Gross.” Tony waved off the screen before walking off.

Everyone dispersed soon after while Bucky continued to stand still at his original spot as he stared off into where the screen once was.

Seemed a lot like love, Bucky thought as he witnessed the development between his best friend and the girl that managed to find a way into his pal’s heart.

———————————————————————

[sylvie-writes]

Exhausting yet Fun

Request: hey it’s my birthday on the 5th and I was wondering if I could request a fic/hc about Steve? Maybe there was a surprise party that the team put together for the reader and there were games and all that. Don’t feel pressured to do this though, I completely understand. Thank you anyways! @marvelfanatic16

Hiya hon! I really wanted to write this for you, so here’s my early present to you hehe! Happy Early Birthday!!! (I would’ve queued this but why not post it now?) 

So sorry if this is bad and/or not what you wanted. I’m preparing for school soon and my brain is already in shambles. I just really wanted to give you this!

The title tho..

“Babe, wake up.” Steve gently shook your shoulder, whispering in an attempt to wake you up. 

This morning you and Sam went for a run after you lost a bet the other day. 

“So if the team likes my mac n cheese better, you and I are gonna go running.” 

“Keep dreaming, Sammy.” You patted Sam’s shoulder, confidently walking away with a hot pot of mac n cheese, your grandmother’s recipe. There was absolutely no way you would lose. 

“Sam, is that bacon!” - Bucky

“Oh my god, this tastes like liquid gold with pieces of heavenly bacon.” - Tony

“Don’t break up with me darling, but the bacon is killerrrr.” - Steve

Famous last words- “There was absolutely no way you would lose.” 

Needless to say, you and Sam had shaken on that deal, there was no turning back. 

So this morning from 3am to 6am Sam had you running, jogging, sprinting. Whatever you’d like to call it, bottom line, it was painful. 

To make matters worse it was your birthday and no one had said a single word yet. 

It’s not like you were trying to be vain or anything, but one day out of the year, it’s nice to feel loved!

As soon as torture time was over, you hopped in a car and headed back to the compound. 

Maybe it should’ve been an ambulance

Sam dropped you off at the front before driving off once again. Where was he going at 6:30 in the morning?

You had no clue and if you weren’t exhausted you would’ve bugged him about it.

Moopping to the bathroom, you started a hot shower, grabbing epsom salt for your jelly-like legs. 

It’s not that you were physically inactive, no, it was the fact that Sam has suddenly started to run faster, almost catching up to Steve and Bucky’s speed. Come to find out they’ve been training him.   

At 7:45 am, now clean and fresh, yet still tired, you crawled back into bed. Steve’s light snores signaling he was still out like a log. Or so you thought.

Turning on your side, your back to Steve, you shut your eyes, until you felt warm hands on your shoulder.

Just as you were about to turn, Steve shushed you. 

“Shhh, just go to sleep, doll.” 

His sleepy morning voice was groggy but adorable. You could tell he was just as sleepy yet he still continued to lightly massage your shoulders, sending you to sleep. 

Now, it was 1 pm and Steve was trying to wake you.

It was a plan.

Last night, the mac n cheese.

Everyone had come together to conspire a plan for your birthday. They all knew you were never one to back down from a challenge. So when opportunity presented itself, they gladly took it.

In reality, your mac n cheese would’ve won had not everyone decided to let Sam win, now enabling them to have time to plan for your surprise party. 

While Sam took you on the longest route in hopes of tiring you out, the team rested, knowing very well you’d sleep for hours into the afternoon.

When Sam had dropped you off, little did you know that he was going to get your party decorations and cake.

Andddd while you were sleeping, Steve and the rest of the team decorated the compound. 

Your eyes slowly fluttered open as you turned on your back to see a showered and dressed Steve sitting on the edge of the bed.

“Can I help you, sir?” 

Steve chuckled and then grabbed your hands, tenderly helping you out of the bed, holding you upright as you were still trying to wake up. 

Reaching behind you, he grabbed a fresh cup of coffee, which you happily took, the warmth of the steam hitting your face, a bliss feeling. 

“To answer your question, when you're ready, get dressed and meet me in my office.”

A kiss on your cheek and he was gone, and out the door.

Slightly confused, you finished your coffee and left to go get ready. 

At 1:43 pm exactly, you walked out of the bedroom and towards the elevator, taking the route to Steve’s office which was two floors above you. 

Once again, little did you know, Steve really just wanted you to deliberately miss the kitchen and common room, where the rest of the team resided with all the decorations and games. 

It was an annual thing with the team to have a game nice once or twice every month. You all played games from Uno, Battleship, Apples to Apples. 

You name it, you played it.

Well, an all time favorite was monopoly, where you all would get on teams and see who’d have the most property and money at the end. A game Tony was terrible at playing. 

Soooo they had it for your birthday! 

Board games with the team were absolutely hilarious. 

You’d all play mario kart but last time that happened, this got a little out of hand, literally. *ahem Natasha* 

She may or may not have tried to rip off Bucky's metal arm…

You opened the door to Steve’s office and he immediately jumped up from his desk, totally not fiddling with something in his hand. 

He shoved the thing in his pocket and nervously chuckled walking up to you. 

“You look gorgeous as always.” He held out his arm and you looped yours within, curious as to why you were leaving the office when you had just shown up.

In the elevator, you could tell Steve was nervous, his foot slightly tapping.

“Are you okay, Grant?” 

Grant- a term of endearment you’d always use for Steve. 

Unlocking his eyes from the floor, he looked at you and smiled, like he was relieved. 

“Definitely.” Steve pecked your lips and escorted you out of the elevator as the door opened up.

Upon entering, you rounded the corner and to the common room, in which the lights were off. 

You almost went to turn on the lights when they shot on and the team popped up from their hiding places. 

Startled, you jumped onto Steve as he and the team laughed, you joining in on the laughter. 

“Happy Birthday, (y/n)!!!!” 

You walked forward and smiled gleefully, your cheeks were hurting from smiling so much but it was impossible not to. 

“Guys-you didn’t have to do all this for me.” Your hand covered your mouth as you took in all of their lovely work. Wanda came up and hugged you, the other team members coming up to do the same.

“Of course we did! We love you, (y/n).” 

At Wanda’s statement you just hugged her tightly and let out happy tears.

This team- well your family! They have shown you so much love, how could you not cry? It was a nice feeling to feel loved and appreciated. 

Soon after all the salutations, Steve put his hand on the small of your back leading you to the kitchen, where the lights were also off. 

The team followed suit, Tony telling F.R.I.D.A.Y to turn on the lights. 

The relaxing ambiance of yellow lights, shown on a beautiful birthday cake. 

One Sam had gone to pick up from your favorite bakery, which when you later found out and hugged him to death. 

Too caught up in the cake you hadn’t even noticed Steve until he spoke up, the team all standing around with their phones, you looked at them and then down at your boyfriend, on his knee. 

Steve’s hand was shaking as he held out a box, and you just wanted to soothe his nerves. 

He was so adorable you just smiled sweetly at him as if telling him to proceed. 

“Doll, (y/n), I love you so much, you’ve been here for me, you are loyal, loving, and funny. My best friend, and I don’t know what I’d ever do without you. Will you do me the honor of making me the happiest man alive by marrying me?” 

His little speech was just the cutest and you vigorously shook your head. The ring slipped perfectly on your finger.

Steve stood up and you flung your arms around his neck as he swung you in a circle.

Setting you down, Steve then leaned in for a kiss, the team cheering you on.

The excitement of the proposal was the main topic over the delicious cake, the team already preparing for your wedding.

After cake, Tony giddily whipped out Monopoly, already predicting his win, the total opposite of what actually happened. 

Let’s just say that Tony can never. ever. be the banker again. 

To end your lovely birthday, you and the team sat around on the couch, watching a comedy Bucky had found. 

Joyful laughter filled the room as you looked down at your ring, smiling. Sighing blissfully then leaning into Steve’s arm. 

This indeed had been the best birthday, the team succeeding in their mission. 

These people were definitely your family and this man beside you, your husband to-be. 

[ftb-writes]

And the truth is revealed! I was waiting to post the Marvel fic for Captain Steve Rogers's birthday! Happy Birthday, OG Cap! And the next fic will be Skyrim!

No, but in all actuality, everyone. This was a really difficult fic for me to write, purely because it dealt with some darker themes, and very heavy-handedly. I had trouble writing this 'What if?' fic because it was so dark, and right from the get go. I had to put it down for a couple days at a time as I was writing. So, before you go into this, a few warnings. There is a bit of body horror, though I tried not to get too detailed. There is child death. There is implied (though not *directly* witnessed by the characters) torture. Of both adults and children. Admittance to suicide ideation. Implied cannibalism, and something that ended up sounding like a weird, pseudo-magical prion disease. Implied (though not stated) sexual torture/abuse. This fic is very dark. Please, proceed with caution.

*Please. Please, sir; kill me.

** Thank you.

It is dank in the cramped cellar-turned-laboratory of the crumbling Erskine estate. The age of the damp air hits Steven like a steam train. He chokes on the smell of death and rot wrapping cloyingly around him and the other Avengers. Next to him, Sam and Bucky are gagging, and he hears Tony curse quietly. For once, Steve lets the foul-mouthed inventor be -- the stench is bringing bile to the back of his throat.

The lights don't flick on, despite all the others in the abandoned estate working, and Steve sighs as he flicks the switch up and down a few times ineffectually. The agents with them silently pull out torches. Steve feels his mouth from a grim line as the artificial light washes away the perceived innocence of his old friend.

Abraham had shelves of jars lining the walls, all filled with formaldehyde and bits of human tissue, organs, even a whole fetus suspended in one. The cells on the other side of the ring of light the agents wield are rusty and blood-stained, and have rotting remains still trapped inside. Steve can't bring himself to look at the rib bones jutting up.

As they make their way deeper, the team quickly discovers that the celler opens up into a much larger space -- larger than was reported. They split up and begin to look around, and both the Avengers and the agents accompanying them are horrified by some of the remains they are finding. No one comments on how young the victims all are.

Steve steps around a shelf and notices another victim, this one tacked to the wall and opened up like an anatomical doll. He feels himself heave, and only just avoids puking. There's still some form, but she's mostly sludge by this point. It would have been a gruesome way to go.

To his horror, the girl lifts her head, and Steve chokes on a scream that threatens to tear out of him.

"Bitte," the little girl wheezes. "Bitte, Herr; Töte mich."*

Steve doesn't realize he's crying until after he's fired. He hears one of the nearby agents uttering a prayer for her. "This was a mistake," he tells the team. "We shouldn't be here. This place should have been left to hell."

No one responds.

A few minutes later -- and Steve's morbidly relieved none of the other victims still live -- Bucky mutters a curse of his own. "Stevie, you'll want to see this. Can I get a medic over here?"

Steve weaves his way around shelves, cells, and even a chain-covered operating table. Bucky motions him over to one of the cells, and Sam is just breaking the lock.

Inside the cage is Johann Schmidt, bound, bloodied, and bare. He barely reacts to their presence, but Steve can still see the small flinch. The German isn't looking at any of them, staring out the opposite side of the cell into the dark.

It's Steve's turn to swear. "Get a blanket," he tells the medic that's arrived. As they hurry off, Steve cautiously climbs in with Schmidt and starts cutting away the ropes.

"He's still alive," the German whispers. "Erskine. The fools used the wrong bullet."

"He's delirious," Sam huffs.

"That monster did all this," Schmidt continues, as if Sam hadn't spoken. "And now he's going to do it all to you, Rogers. You should not have come."

The medic returns at that moment, and Steve takes the offered blanket and wraps Schmidt up, before carefully lifting him. "What do you mean?"

"He's still down here," Schmidt breathes.

All the torches go out simultaneously. One of the agents yelps, and then gurgles. Schmidt begins to shiver.

"Please," he whispers. "Shoot me. I can't-"

Steve sets the German on his feet and draws his gun, but catches Schmidt as his legs give out. To see the once proud founder of HYDRA helpless -- Steve doesn't dare think what must have happened to him down here, alone and in the dark.

"Can you walk?" Steve asks, and Schmidt shakes his head.

"Can't feel my legs," Schmidt grunts, and Steve hates the spike of pity and fear that lurches through him.

"I'm going to get you out of here," Steve murmurs.

"I'm a dead man, Rogers. Finish the job and save yourselves. He's not even human anymore."

"What-" Steve starts to ask, and a massive black shape lurches out of the darkness and sinks long claws into the flesh of Schmidt's thigh.

The German screams, and as Steve empties the rest of the magazine into the thing's face, Schmidt pulls the shield free and slams it into the beast's chest. Sam and Bucky are shouting.

"I don't want to be hurt again," Schmidt wimpers, just loud enough for Steve to hear.

He reloads as best as he can one handed -- there's no way he's letting Schmidt go now -- and fires directly into the thing's wrist. It howls, but releases Schmidt and Steve scoops the German up and runs.

He can hear the thing barreling along behind him, whatever it is. Steve hadn't gotten a good look at it, but it reeks of decay, with a bleached skull for a face, and thick, dark fur. It looks like something out of a bad horror film, only real, and Steve can hear agents behind him screaming, and his team calling directions to the exit. Schmidt is sobbing like a child in his arms.

Somehow, in the dark, Steve manages to find the doorway, stumbles up the stairs, out of the cellar. Peter is right behind him, no doubt shoved ahead by Tony, and right behind Peter is the inventor himself. The rest of the Avengers make it out all right, but they've lost most of the agents, and the medic that had brought Steve the blanket. Thor slams the door shut, and the silence is deafening. The group slowly makes their way out to the trucks, stumbling over their own feet as the adrenaline wears off.

In the bright, summer light, Dr. Banner begins to look over Schmidt's wounds, and Steve asks about that beast.

"They have many names; none should be spoken aloud. They eat us mortals, Rogers. Erskine is a monster now. I came -- I was looking for signs of my son. For his sake, I hope the boy's long dead. I -- He-"

Bruce shushes him gently. "Once we get Erskine cleared out, you can search for his remains."

"Danke," Schmidt murmurs, "but he's probably been eaten."**

Steve shakes his head. "I'm so sorry," he tells Schmidt, and means it. "How long had Erskine been torturing people? When he-?"

"Even before he left Germany," Schmidt whispers. "That's why -- I wanted everyone to see what me and the others saw. They're all buried around out here, now. I'm the only one left."

"The others?" Steve prompts.

Schmidt swallows thickly. "When the Nazis were financing the super soldier program, and they had just signed Erskine on, there were about fifty-seven other kids that had been shipped out here. For… experimentation. I happened to be the most fitting candidate. So he didn't kill me, but I wish he had. I suffered so much under his thumb. Am still suffering."

"Other kids," Sam asks. "What do you mean, other kids?"

Schmidt looks at them in shock. "You mean, you didn't know? No one over there knew?"

"Knew what?" Steve hands him a bottle of water, and Schmidt sips from it before he answers.

"Rogers, I was only fifteen during the war. Three years younger than you. I was selected because I'd been an orphan for most of my life by that point. I arrived when I was, I'm not sure, maybe eight? By twelve, I already wanted to die." Schmidt seems concerned. "Did none of SHIELD really know how old I was?"

"No," Steve sighs, and he feels guilty now. If he'd known all of this during the war, he would have tried at least a little bit harder to de-escalate things between him and Schmidt. Maybe, the German might have been talked out of world domination. But then again, if he'd known all this during the war, a lot of things would have been different.

"I can see those sad puppy dog eyes from over here, Rogers. I assure you, nothing you could have said at that point would have stopped me. As I said, I wanted to die. At least as the Red Skull, no one would hurt me."

Before Steve can think of a response, Schmidt clears his throat. "We should come up with a plan. Before it gets dark. Things like that can't come out during the day. However, once it gets dark…"

Peter raises his hand quietly, as if trying to ask a question in school. "I'd rather not be eaten thanks," he admits, "I have a math test next week."

Schmidt laughs, surprisingly. "A good head on his shoulders, Junior," he says to Tony. "Now, do any of you have silver bullets?"

One of the remaining agents laughs, but as Schmidt silently turns his attention toward the agent, they realize no one else is laughing. The chuckles awkwardly trail off. No one actually answers Schmidt.

"Well then, the best thing we can do is leave to get some, and try to make it back before sundown. Otherwise he might just run off, and we'll never see him again."

"I'll go," Steve offers. "The rest of you, stay here and make sure he doesn't leave. Schmidt, you want to come with me?"

Schmidt hesitates, obviously a bit uncomfortable, but he shrugs and nods. "I'd rather be as far away from -- the thing Erskine has become as possible."

"We'll take care of it," Steve promises Schmidt, as the two climb into one of the trucks. "That thing, whatever it is, isn't natural. That's for sure."

"No." Schmidt shifts in the seat, clearly trying to get more comfortable while also favoring his injured leg. "No, it's not."