imawreck
imawreck
For The Morally Grey
79 posts
Ayden/ She/her /21Masterlist*Requests Are OPEN!*
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imawreck · 23 hours ago
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Ally
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Original Character
Summary: Max follows Steve to meet with the other Avengers despite her concerns about a certain Red Witch.
Author's Note: This Chapter is mostly made of my Boyfriends genius ideas, so thank him for helping me actually keep my word and get a chapter out on the last day of this month.
Warnings: Cursing and MCU cannon violence, mentions of panic attacks.
Word Count: 2,600
Max-
Steve was being very un-Steve-like.
At least in comparison to the memories I have from time at the tower. What I remembered of him was a stark contrast to the oddly understanding and awfully affectionate man seated beside me.
After a bit more talking in Carlos’s living room to make sure I was up to date in the events of the last four years I’d been gone, Steve had said that we needed to leave and get the others as soon as possible.
Now, we sat next to each other on a train headed from London to Scotland where we’d find Vision and a very unhappy— probably homicidal—Wanda. We’d flown from Madripoor to London twelve hours ago, leaving both of us sleep deprived and hungry. 
Snacks didn’t exactly satisfy the super-soldier metabolism. 
Still, Steve had managed to keep his good mood through the ride so far. He would check in on me occasionally, his eyes glancing up from a newspaper he read to ask if I needed anything. I always said no.
Twenty minutes after his last check in, he’d put down the paper. “What have you been up to all these years?”
The question startled me a bit. 
“I… Not a lot more than what I did back then, really.” I shrugged. “I took care of some things in the first couple of years and then I took up jobs as a Merc. That’s really it.”
Steve’s brow furrowed, “That's a little vague. Come on, you left straight out of a coma the last time I saw you. I was— what I saw—.”
I snapped my head towards him, a lick of horror and shame stirring in me. “I don’t want to talk about that.”
His mouth closed, but he turned himself in his seat to face me. “Max,” his head tilted and there was a softness about his face I felt unsure of. “I think that a little explanation is deserved.”
I twisted my lips at him, knowing he was probably right. I didn’t have to like it, though. “What do you want me to say? I woke up from a coma. I didn’t know I was even asleep, actually. I thought I was still stuck in that cell that whole time, and when you said it was two weeks—.” 
My heart was thundering in my ears, and a skittering jolt passed through my body as my adrenaline kicked in. I tried to breathe, tried to suck in air, but it was like I was being choked by some invisible enemy.
Steve’s steady hand snagged my arm and squeezed. “Hey, woah there. Are you alright?”
His blue eyes were in my face a moment later. They weren’t the same blue as Bucky’s, but they were close enough to pull the memory of a certain silver-armed soldier to the forefront of my mind. 
The guilt that flooded me at the thought of him fueled the oncoming attack I knew was on the horizon. My eyes screwed shut as I fought to take in a shuttering few breaths. Steve still remained kneeled in front of me. His large frame was thankfully angled enough to keep my breakdown hidden from the eyes of the other passengers. 
I felt his other hand come up to rest on my other arm, sending quick squeezes every so often as he talked quietly to me. “Max, I need you to talk to me. Tell me what you need me to do.”
It was strange to hear him talk so gently to me, but having him there soothed me just the slightest bit. Kept me anchored enough so that I could pull in a breath or two into my aching lungs. 
“Just give me a minute,” I breathed, subconsciously reaching for his arm to steady myself. 
Panic attacks were part of the ‘New Me.’ Not the best part, but it came with the package. After realizing how easily it was for me to lose chunks of time due to the nature of my new power, and how real everything seemed when I was trapped in it, I began to wonder if I would ever escape them at all. If the next time I saw the familiar four walls of my shabby apartment would be reality, or just another trick of my own mind.
It really screwed with my head.
Once I’d gotten my breathing even again, and my head cleared a bit, I shot Steve the best smile I could at the moment. “Sorry. I, uh… I have trouble knowing what’s real and what’s made up in here sometimes.” I tapped my head, “It happens less now than it did in the beginning but… sometimes my mind is something I can’t control. Not anymore.”
I hated the look of pity that crawled over his features. It made my insides writhe with shame and bitterness, and I pushed his hands from my arms. “You should get back in your seat. I can hear the engineer talking over the radio. We’re pulling into the station soon.”
Steve nodded slowly, looking like he wanted to say something but decided against it. He didn’t take his eyes off me for the rest of the ride.
-----
Steve-
We’d arrived at night. The streets were dark, and most of the people had vacated the streets. It would be easier to stay low and make finding Wanda and Vision less complicated.
Max followed closely behind me. Her steps were silent on the cobblestone streets, and I’d catch her eyes darting around the darkness as we went. 
She hadn’t spoken for the rest of the train ride here, but the bit she’d shared shed light on how she’d been living for the last four years. I wondered how many nights that first year she’d spent trying to figure out if she was really awake or not and how many years after she’d suffered. 
I wondered how often her mind played tricks on her even now.
Rounding the corner, I opened a storage room door and ushered her in. Max slipped around me and into the room, snagging the duffle in my hands on her way in. It carried a Kevlar vest, some combat boots and a few pairs of clothes she’d insisted on getting from the place she’d been staying before we made it here. 
I watched as she sifted through the bag and pulled out her belongings. I grabbed my suit when she was finished and retreated around a crowded case of cleaning chemicals and brooms to ensure I couldn’t see her.
There was a distinct clicking that echoed throughout the small space. It broke the silence in odd intervals, and I tried to figure out if it was a camera or an electrical issue somewhere in the vicinity. “Do you hear that?”
There was a shift, more clicking, and a sigh. “Yeah. Don’t worry about it.”
I paused, confused as I finished suiting up. “It could be a camera. Not sure why they’d have it in here, but—.”
“It’s not a camera. There’s nothing to worry about.” Max rounded the corner as she said it, her fingers clicking the strap of knives into place across her chest. “Trust me.”
She looked like her old self, though the red suit was long gone. Instead, she’d suited herself in black leather and Kevlar. The design on her suit was strange, like it was Frankenstein stitched back together somehow. The hems were oddly placed, and the gadgets she carried were clearly either homemade or bought from a rather sketchy place. 
The strangest part about it though, was the diamond pattern of holes trailing down her spine. Metal glinted from under the suit, the silver catching in the dim lights as she turned to inspect the rest of her gear. 
I shoved my set of clothes into the bag and held my hand out for hers, shoving them in as well and zipping it shut. The atmosphere of the room was tense, like I’d said something wrong, but Max was quick to turn around and pin me with her blank eyes.
“So, what exactly is the plan?” Her fingers came up to undo her braid, tugging out the knots.
I shook my head and pulled out a device from the bag. “I have a tracking device on them. Should take us straight to their location.”
“Peachy, makes things much simpler. I’m still very concerned about our witchy friend.” 
I winced, “Yeah, you might have to wait outside while I handle that first.”
“Works for me.” Max swiftly tied her hair up in a braided knot near the base of her head, her features schooled into a face of indifference. “”Though I think she’ll be handling you.”
I shook my head, a ripple of anger slipping into my gut before I let it go. “It’ll be fine, let’s just get a move on. They’re downtown.”
She didn’t say much else as we made our way back out onto the quiet streets. I followed the beacon, leading us towards the pair of Avengers, while Max scanned the streets for any particular signs of trouble. 
And it wasn’t long before trouble showed face.
Max gripped the collar of my uniform and yanked me back with enough force to have me stumbling to catch myself. “What–”
“Shh!” She smacked a hand over my mouth, her ears trained on something even I couldn’t pick up on. Her eyes stared into mine, devoid of light and unnervingly still, “I hear fighting.”
I swallowed, tugging her hand back. “How far?”
“Couple streets,” She mumbled, her eyes snapping east, “that way.”
I take off in a jog, and Max leaps onto the nearest fire escape and disappears over the side of the building heading towards the noise. A few roads later, and I begin hearing the distinct clash of weaponry and pained voices calling to each other.
I took a breath, rounded the corner, and prepared for the worst.
-----
Max- 
Whatever those things were in the street, they were ugly as hell.
They were tall, dull skinned, and obviously not from around here. I crouched on the rooftop to stay out of sight, heeding Steve’s warning that I might need to sit this little reunion out. Instead, I watched the fight closely, taking in their movements and strange fluidity despite their larger stature. It wouldn’t be a fair fight, even with Steve rounding the corner below. 
I readied to intervene, but to my surprise, the familiar whir of a jet pack echoed overhead, and a blonde dropped into the fight with a killer right hook.
The worry I felt growing eased just slightly, but was quickly replaced by a simmering anger. 
Romanoff.
I tossed my legs over the rooftop and settled in, observing the fight much like one would a basketball game… mildly disinterested. 
The fight was rather quick after that, and I remained an onlooker as they watched the aliens descend into their little ship afterwards. A ship I hadn’t even heard approach, which unsettled me some.
The group of ex-Avengers huddled together, and Steve glanced up at me briefly before clearing his throat. “It’s good to see you all.”
Natasha was next, “You missed the last check in.” Her tone was biting.
Steve sighed, “I was following a lead for an asset and it couldn’t wait.”
“What asset, exactly?” She asked, that bite growing more offensive as the seconds ticked on.
“That would be me,” I cut in, swinging my feet carelessly from the rooftop. “Apparently I’m needed for something very, very big coming our way.”
Immediately, Wanda’s head snapped up. Her eyes glowed that stark red and bitterness leaked into her features. “You!”
-----
Wanda-
The sight of her filled me with burning hatred. Max was an evil that deserved to be eradicated. Her entire life was a plight, a disease. 
I didn’t feel the tiniest bit of remorse when I launched an iron rod at her head. I knew it wouldn’t connect, but it would cause her pain even if she blocked it and that brought me an inkling of peace knowing she’d feel even an ounce of what I had been feeling since Pietro’s death.
So much pain. It ate away at me.
I could hear the others shouting below, all trying to talk me down, to reason with me. They were the ones that couldn’t see reason. They were the ones who couldn’t see the evil right in front of them. It didn’t matter if she was brainwashed, controlled like a puppet, or had her mind to herself…Everything she did caused death. Everyone that came close to her suffered.
The Avengers were supposed to eliminate things that tormented this planet, and she was top of the list.
“You murdered my brother!” My voice shook with the volume of my scream, “You made his death slow and painful. You made him suffer!”
I tore bricks from the platform, benches from the ground, even signs from their posts to launch at her. Anything I could use. I would bury her in rubble, crush her with the force of it, and be done.
I watched as she hunkered down and took every piece of debris that rained down on her as I shouted and screamed over the sounds of tearing metal and the shouts of my teammates below. “Do you even remember it? Do you remember cutting the back of his legs to the bone? Stabbing him in the stomach so he’d die slowly?” 
My eyes stung as I grit my teeth, “You did it on purpose, didn’t you? Enjoyed it.”
Through the gap between her arms, she glared at me. Those silvery blue eyes glinting as her guard dropped away, the shrapnel flying in her direction disintegrating in mid air as the world around me warped before settling exactly as it had looked before I’d torn it apart.
Like… 
My eyes widened as the cold, sharp bite of a blade tilted my chin up. I found her face, cold and furious as she stared at me over the knife.
“I did not enjoy murdering your brother.” Max said calmly, “And I am truly sorry for what I have done to hurt you.” Her knife pressed harder against my skin, “But if you try and pull that again, I’ll put you down. I’m here to help because Rogers asked me to. I’ll do what I’m here for, and I’ll disappear when the job is done.”
The others, Steve, Sam, Vision, and Natasha all stood a few feet away with grim expressions. I was still reeling from what had happened. How it had happened.
But then I remembered that cobalt blue sludge that had attacked me all those years ago when I’d fought her. The way it had crawled across the floor towards me like a living thing, reaching and grabbing.
She’d used it on me again and I hadn’t even sensed it coming.
Max turned towards the others, that cold indifference making her expression unreadable. “If we’re done with the hugs and ‘how-are-you’s, I’d like to get a move on. I still need to be briefed on this whole thing.”
“Right,” Steve answered, his eyes flicking over me and back to her, “We need to board the Jet. Get back to the Tower.”
Sam frowned, “You serious? Stark Tower? With Stark?”
Steve gave him a look, “It’s time.”
There was a silence that settled over the group. I begrudgingly refrained from trying to kill Max. At least until whatever it was that was going on got handled. After that…
After that, I’d find a way to drag her to hell myself.
Tags<3
@greatmistakes / @cjand10 / @greatenthusiasttidalwave / @calwitch / @blackbirdwitch22 / @imdoingathingmom / @readawaythereality2
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imawreck · 3 days ago
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enemies to loversssss! make i happen! (dude i’ll read whatever you give me) ☕️🍪
You’re literally the reason I write/have the courage to post. Thank you for your comment! I’m working on several different works (trying desperately to broaden my audience with different character fics) so hopefully I’ll get something worked up soon!
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imawreck · 8 days ago
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Update (sort of)
Hey 👀
I know I said I would be updating my New Beginnings fic, and that’s still on the table. But would there be any interest in a DBF!Bucky, or maybe an enemies to lovers? I need some short fics to keep me inspired. Currently working on a Thor x Reader soulmate AU, but I’m a little nervous it won’t get any attention 😅. Anyways, I hope you all are surviving and perhaps even thriving!
-Ayden
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imawreck · 22 days ago
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Hey! For those of you who are waiting on an update for New Beginning, I would like you to know it’s my next update! Hope you all are doing well, and thank you for your continued support!!! 💖💖💖
- Ayden
@greatmistakes / @imdoingathingmom / @cjand10 / @greatenthusiasttidalwave / @calwitch / @blackbirdwitch22 / @readawaythereality2
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imawreck · 23 days ago
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Darkness
Pairing: Winter Soldier x Reader
Summary: You're left with flushed cheeks and a shared secret with the darkest part of Bucky Barnes... and you want more.
Author's Note: You guys fucking DEVOURED the last one so this is the sequel to the previous part, His. It makes more sense if you read the other first! If you like this content, drop a comment or an ask and I'll be sure to write more like it in the future! It gets a little feral and I won't apologize for it. Also, there is possibly a part three on the table if this ship sails like the last.
Warnings: Choking kink, metal arm kink, Cursing, mentions self loathing/guilt (it’s Bucky, kinda normal), Possessive!Winter Soldier, hair pulling, fingering, Dominant!Winter Soldier, hickeys, bruising, PnV, praise kink if you squint, licking, oral (fem receiving), knife play (?) and probably some more but those are the big ones.
Word Count: 6,899
It had been two days.
Two days since you’d tried and failed to lure the Winter Soldier into a cell. Two days since you’d felt his hands on your body.
Two days since he’d given you a taste of what you could have.
He’d left his mark on more than just your skin. Though bruises and love bites littered your neck, it was your mind that he’d left the most impact on.
There was hardly a moment you weren’t thinking about him, about Winter. About what would’ve happened if the agents hadn’t stormed the stairwell. If he’d been able to keep going.
And you wondered if you’d ever get another chance to see.
Bucky had recovered, his mind once more his own. You didn’t know if he remembered, or if he would say anything to you even if he did. It’d been radio silence from everyone in the tower other than Steve, who’d been checking in on you to make sure you were really alright. You were sure Thor would be here hounding you if he was on the planet too.
Apparently, the earpiece had fallen out a little after he’d cornered you. So Steve and whoever else that was watching over you didn’t hear much of the conversation you’d exchanged with the assassin. They’d had to rely on the cameras, which hadn’t been able to see you past the wall of a man caging you between his arms.
Which means none of them had seen what had happened, that this was something only you carried the knowledge of. A small part of you was relieved.
That still left one question unanswered: Did Bucky remember?
A sharp knock jolted you from your thoughts, dragging you back to the present. 
Blowing out a breath, you got up and headed towards the door. “Steve, I told you I’m fine. I—“
But when you opened the door, it wasn’t Steve on the other side.
It was strange how different those blue eyes were when it was Bucky at the wheel instead of Winter. Lively, pooling with emotion where you’d seen cold calculation and unbridled lust just days before.
It was guilt swimming in those eyes now, red rimmed and bloodshot. His dark hair was disheveled like he’d been running his fingers through it all afternoon, and he wore a loose pair of sweats and a black long sleeve despite the summer heat.
He looked scared and out of place standing in the hall.
“I—uh, hey.” A poor attempted smile wobbled onto his face, and he brought his flesh hand up to run through his hair—a nervous habit he had when he was uncomfortable or anxious — just like you’d guessed. “Can we talk?”
You opened your mouth to answer him but no words left it. You could only stare up at him and nod, feet shuffling back to pull the door open further.
Bucky’s frame squeezed through the door and he padded further into your space with wandering eyes and furrowed brows.
It was impossible not to notice the changes you’d made in the last few months since your breakup. Bucky used to frequently stay with you, favoring your bright and comforting space over his own empty room. You liked your knick-knacks, and you were a sucker for creature comforts so you always had the softest blankets and the fluffiest pillows. And you’d always made sure Bucky had things he liked in your space.
You used to keep his favorite coffee stocked in the mini breakfast bar you’d made on a bar cart, and his favorite pillow and throw blanket was always neatly folded in the armchair by the window. You’d even set out copies of his favorite books in case he wanted to relax in your room instead of the commons area or his own space. 
But now it was gone. The little pieces of him you’d made room for were removed along with the photos that used to line your walls and bookcase. Save for the one, of course.
And it stung to see the reality of what he’d done, the choice he’d made now reflected in the absence of everything he’d built with you. 
He pried his eyes away from the empty shelves of your bookcase and glanced back at you, shuffling his feet awkwardly. “I… Steve said that I went after you when I got back.”
His statement hung in the air for a few seconds, silence crowding you both and making him tense his shoulders the longer it remained. 
“I’m sorry,” he blurted out, “I can’t imagine how awful that was for you. I-I never wanted you to see me like that. That- He’s not me, okay? God, I’m so sorry.” His fingers scraped over his scalp as he clenched his teeth, turning away and pacing a few steps.
Bucky couldn’t look at you, not after what he’d done. What he’d forced you to witness. He’d never wanted you to see him like that. It was one of his worst nightmares when you had been dating, and now it was a brutal reality.
“Bucky,” you started, but he cut you off.
“Did I hurt you? Did… did I do something to you?”
It struck you then that he didn’t remember what he’d done. What Winter had done. And your room was too dark at the moment to see what remained painted on your skin from the encounter.
You were both relieved, and utterly frustrated. Now what do you do? ‘Oh yeah, Bucky! I let you finger me with your metal arm in a stairwell for shits and giggles while you were all killer mode. No biggie.’ And then what, ask for him to do it again?
Yeah, definitely not.
“You didn’t hurt me, Bucky.” Your legs moved on their own accord, drawn forward by his obvious distress and the instinctual need to sooth his worries. “I’m fine, really.”
Bucky finally turned to face you, his eyes filled with sorrow. He chewed his cheek, his eyes searching your face for any hint of a lie. “I can't remember what happened, there's just glimpses.” His voice lowered, softened by the weight of his words and the fear woven in his tone. “But I can feel him. Stronger than before. Something’s different this time.”
You stilled at that, eyes glued to the side of his face. 
“I can feel what he felt. I-it's like he’s just behind a curtain.” His right arm came up, his index finger tapping his temple, “Waiting.”
The haunted look in his eyes twisted a knife of guilt in your gut. You didn’t want him to feel guilty for what had happened, but it was unfortunately normal for Bucky. You understood it, respected his boundaries and his need to do anything he could to keep you safe. But you wanted exactly what he was keeping from you.
You wanted it so badly.
Could you tell him? Could you confide in him this secret you’d kept from lovers in the past? Something so twisted that you’d only shared it with someone equally as sadistic as you were flawed? Bucky was so much more important to you than any of them had been. You… you felt deeply for him. And it was obvious that the unknown was weighing on him heavily.
One more look at his shattered expression gave you your answer.
With a frustrated huff, you reached for his hand. You tugged it from where it’d curled itself into his hair again, and led him to the edge of your bed. “Bucky,” you started, keeping your voice as gentle as you could. “I need to tell you something. It’s going to be hard to understand, and you’ll probably think very differently of me, but I think it might lessen the burden I can see you’re putting on yourself.”
Bucky’s eyes fixed on you. Those brows furrowed over confused and tortured eyes, but it was obvious that he would listen.
You bit your lip, beginning to sweat as the nerves rattled through you. “First of all, I… I haven’t told anyone this. It’s not something I’m proud of, but rather something that just is. And it didn’t start with you. I mean—,” you let out a sound of frustration, “Fuck, I mean I didn’t date you because of it. It just sort of grew more complicated as we got closer.”
Those brows furrowed more and twisted his face into more concern than anything.
You kept going. “When you came after me, I was scared. Of course I would be.” You winced at the hurt that flashed in his eyes, but continued on, “But I also… I liked it.” 
A shaky, bitter laugh left you. “I liked the chase. I liked it when he cornered me against the wall, when he—,” you paused, a feeling akin to resignation and begrudging acceptance settling into your bones. Your eyes found his metal hand, gazing at the light bouncing off the silver metal. “When he choked me with that hand.”
You buried your face in your palms, tears of shame threatening to leak from your eyes. “You didn’t hurt me. He didn’t hurt me, Bucky. He just brought to light these things I thought I’d kept from you.” 
With another breath, one that felt like needles sinking into your lungs, you went on. “He made me feel good, Buck, in all the ways I’d always hoped you would someday. I feel like the worst person in the world for thinking that, for feeling the way I do, but I can’t help it.”
You couldn’t meet his eyes. Shame was writhing in your stomach and threatening to consume you. Tears pricked your eyes and wet your palms that still remained pressed to your face. 
Bucky didn’t say a word, and you just let the silence thicken the air. You’d already said everything there was to say.
Your sin was bared for his judgment. “I get that you don’t want to be with me anymore—“
“That’s a lie.”
Your head snapped up at that, teary eyes wide as you took in his surprised expression. An expression you watched morph into confusion, and then something else. Realization, maybe.
Bucky went on, “I never wanted to stop being with you, Y/N.”
A piece of you settled deep in your soul at that confession, and you leaned in to listen. Every word from his lips an answer to the question haunting your every thought for the past three months.
“On that mission, we came across intel that there might be a mole in the tower and that they were going to try and trigger the Winter Soldier. I… I was scared, Y/N.” Grief washed over his face as he folded his hands together, knuckles turning white. “I was so scared that you’d see me like that and be afraid of me. I was terrified of hurting you, of— of killing you, that I had to make it look like you didn’t matter to me. I had to make it real, so that whoever saw you and I would think you didn’t matter and leave you alone. I was trying to make you less of a target.”
Your heart thundered in your chest at his confession, at the thought that these past two months of utter disaster had been the result of Bucky trying to protect you from himself. 
“You could’ve talked to me,” you muttered, sniffing and wiping your face in a poor attempt to rid it of the mascara you knew had run. “You could’ve told me what was going on.”
Bucky’s head shook, “There wasn’t time. You have to understand.”
You nodded, even if you didn’t truly understand. The guilt and remorse on his face told you he was on the edge of crumbling, and if agreeing with him kept him from breaking, you’d give it to him.
Another long silence blanketed the two of you. You watched his face, his eyes, as his mind mulled over the information you had exchanged with him.
Those blue eyes found your’s after a while, something steely in them that wasn’t there before. “Friday?”
The AI of Stark Tower answered politely, “Yes, Mr. Barnes?”
“Initiate Soldier Protocol in Y/N’s room and cut camera feed. Don’t alert anyone.”
Soldier Protocol. 
Your eyes widened, and a chill ran over your skin. Soldier Protocol was something Bucky had come up with when you’d first started dating. It was a safety protocol installed into yours and his own room to ensure that if the Winter Soldier was triggered, it would keep whoever was in the room safe, or keep whoever was trying to get inside from entering. It was a double edged sword, really, because if you were trapped in the room with him, then you couldn’t get out. Bucky had made sure to teach you some basic self defense moves on the very slim chance that would ever happen and had shown you ways that you could use to evade and make an escape to the bathroom if needed. Even though you’d thought of all the holes in the protocol, you couldn’t bear to voice them if it helped ease Bucky’s nerves knowing that if something were to happen, that you’d have an extra wall to keep him from getting to you.
“Confirm Command; Soldier Protocol, Miss Y/N?”
You hesitated, voice wavering just the slightest as you whispered, “Are you sure?”
Bucky nodded slowly, giving you the confidence you needed to answer the AI.
“Confirm Soldier Protocol, Friday. No alerts or cameras.”
The calming voice answered once more. “Command Confirmed. Soldier Protocol initiated.”
Your eyes followed the windows as metal safety doors shut out the dim light of the day. One after another they locked out the outside world and left the two of you inside the confines of your bedroom. 
You and Bucky, and your confessions.
“He wants out, Y/N.” It was barely a whisper, but the low timbre of Bucky’s voice reverberated in your bones. “He wants you.”
There was concern laced in his words, but there was also more. So much more that you knew you’d have to talk about later. You’d have time to unpack all of this, what it means for the two of you, later. Right now?
Right now you needed Winter as desperately as you needed air.
“What… How can I help you, Bucky?” Your hands shook at the thought of Winter's return. Of what it would bring.
Bucky pulled his lip between his teeth, his hands running through his hair before twisting themselves in his lap. His eyes were wide, as if he didn’t quite believe he would say the words spilling from his own mouth. “I want you to trigger the Winter Soldier. Feeling him there— it’s driving me mad. An-and now that we know he won’t hurt you and that you… you want him—.”
You reached for his hand, concerned that if he kept squeezing them as tight as he was that he’d break bone. “Bucky, it’s okay.” You tilted your head, smiling softly at him, “Take a breath. There’s a few things I want to set straight before we jump into this.”
His voice lowered, “Okay.”
Bucky was obviously torn up over this whole thing. And as excited as you were to repeat what went on in that stairwell, this was someone you cared about for more than just sex. 
This was Bucky. 
This was the man who’d apologized with the biggest bouquet of flowers you’d ever laid eyes on the day after your first encounter with Winter. The same man who’d apologized for months after with cute little notes and trinkets he knew you loved and still kept in that shoebox under your bed. The exact same man you’d opened your heart to one Saturday night over a tub of butterscotch ice cream and the third playthrough of your favorite movie. He didn’t complain that you’d watched it back to back either.
This was the man you’d fallen in love with in just a few short months.
The realization settled into your heart, and that warm tingly feeling swept over you as you tightened your hold on his flesh hand and reached for his metal one too.
Bucky hesitated, jerking it away for a moment before allowing you to tug it into your lap. “Buck,” you started, thumbs swiping over his hands in slow calming paths. “It isn’t just the Winter Soldier I like about you. You know that, right? Because if you don’t, I’ve failed as your lover. And as your friend.” 
Those blue eyes darted between your own, searching there like a man searching for salvation. You gave his hands another squeeze, swallowing the lump in your throat. “I… I love you, Bucky. You. I think I’ve known for a while now. I was just too scared to admit it out loud. I haven’t had the best run with guys in the past, and you’re so good that I was afraid I’d ruin you somehow.”
Your eyes fell to your joined hands, and this time he was the one to squeeze back.
“I know it’s kind of shitty timing, but I need you to understand that I’m not with you for any other reason other than the simple fact that I adore you, Bucky Barnes. Everything about you.” You shook your head, frowning. “I meant it when I told you I wasn’t with you just because of Winter. I’ve always had this attraction to… well, you know. Dating you just made it more difficult to hide when you were obviously so uncomfortable with it. I didn’t want to make things hard for you. I just wanted you to be happy.”
“Doll,” he mumbled, the name drawing your eyes to him. You’d always loved it when he called you that. “Say it again.”
You frowned, confused for a moment, before a small smile drew itself onto your face. “I love you, Bucky.”
A choked sound fell from his lips before his arms circled around your waist and pulled you into his lap, his face inches from yours. “Again. Say it again,” he begged, his  breath fanned over your face as his fingers fisted the back of your shirt. “Please, doll, say it again.”
You folded your legs around his hips, threading your fingers into his hair and peppering kisses on his face. “I love you.”
“Me?” It was the most broken sound you’d ever heard.
You grabbed his face, tilting it up to look at you and tried your best to pour every ounce of love into your expression. “You, James. I love you. I’ll say it a billion times if I have to until I get it through that ridiculously handsome head of yours.”
He laughed at that, broken as it sounded. “I love you too, Y/N. God, I fucking love you.”
Soft lips crashed into yours, dancing a familiar dance as his flesh hand slipped under your shirt and glided up your spine. Your breath caught as the cool sensation of his metal fingers followed after it, his arm wrapping around your back. You smiled against his lips, leaning into him more.
You nearly pouted when he pulled away.
“Y/N,” those eyes, less uncertain and more determined now, swept over your face. “I want you to trigger him.”
You frowned, “But Bucky, you—.”
“I need this.” His voice was surprisingly steady, “I need to do this otherwise it’ll drive me mad. Feeling him there— Jesus, it’s like someone’s scraping a knife against my skull.”
Metal fingers drew circles against your back, “Are you okay with… with seeing him again? I’m not confident enough to do what he did yet. I need more time to come to terms with the damage this hand has done.” He pulled the appendage away, looking it over before his eyes found you again. “But I… I can tell he won’t hurt you. I can feel it,” he pulled his flesh hand away and pressed it over his heart. “Right here.”
He laughed, almost incredulously. “Even the Winter Soldier has fallen in love with you.”
All you could hear was the pounding of your heart in your ears. He wanted you to trigger the Winter Soldier. He said that he loved you, and that Winter did too. 
It would really fucking suck if you were dreaming.
“I don’t know your words,” you mumbled, suddenly shy in the light of his proclamation.
This time, the smile he gave was one that reminded you of those old photos from the 40s you’d seen in the history museum. The one where the left side crooks up a bit more than the right. He didn’t release you, but instead wrapped his left arm around your hips and leaned back to rifle through the top drawer of your nightstand for the notepad you always left in there.
He pulled it back to himself and released you only long enough to scribble down a few words and tear off the page. “You’ll have to memorize them. I don’t want them to leave this room.”
You nodded, because of course he wouldn’t and you’d rather swallow hot coals than ever betray him. Your eyes scanned the page a dozen times when he handed it to you, lips moving in silence as you played with the foreign vowels. 
All the while those strong hands of his trailed along your back and hips, sometimes exploring your upper thigh. 
It made your mind foggy, and you had to keep yourself from squinting to focus.
After you’d finally memorized them, you remove yourself from Bucky’s lap and padded over to your bookcase. You snagged the candle lighter from a shelf, and then removed the bag from your trash bin. It took a few tries, but once the lighter ignited, you let the flames eat away at the page before dropping it into the bin and watching until it was nothing but ash at the bottom.
You could hear a breath of relief leave the soldier from where he remained seated at the edge of your bed. He looked somewhat relaxed, but a tension still ran along his shoulders.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” You returned to the bed, smiling a bit as his arms wrapped around the back of your thighs.
Bucky hummed, low and steady. “M’sure, Doll.” He leaned his head against your stomach, and your hands found his hair on instinct.
He hummed again at the touch, and his arms tightened around your legs before he lifted you. Bucky turned quickly, one knee coming up onto the bed before he laid you down with a thump on the mattress.
You smiled, laughing a little as you bounced from the sudden drop. Bucky grinned back, his eyes shining. “Missed you, you know. I’m sorry for not telling you.” He leaned over you, hands planting on either side of your head. Nothing but honesty shined in those blue eyes as he looked down at you. “I’m sorry for wasting three months, and I promise I won’t do that again.”
Butterflies stirred in your belly, and you could feel the flush of heat on your neck as you leaned up and planted a kiss on his lips, “Better not.” 
Before you could think much of it, Bucky reached over and flicked the lamp on. You were too busy feeling fuzzy inside that you’d forgotten the very prominent marks littering the delicate flesh of your neck.
Marks that would always make Bucky drown in guilt.
“Fuck, doll.” 
He stared at your neck, horror painting his face in the lamplight. His body lifted until he was sitting on his knees over you, hands resting on his lap like he didn’t know what to do with them as he took in the damage he’d left.
This is exactly what you didn’t want to happen. “Hey, no—,” you gripped the front of his shirt, the sudden motion catching him off guard as you pulled yourself up to his face, forcing him to look you in the eyes. You would’ve liked to yank him back over you, but you lacked the ability to battle his serum-enhanced strength. Sitting up did just fine.
“You don’t get to feel guilty for this. Not now, and not anytime after this if you… if we’re serious about doing this.” You stared him down, unwilling to allow him even a glance away. “I told you, I liked it. I told you that it didn’t hurt. You need to trust me as much as I trust you in this. That’s the only way this,” you motioned between you both, “is going to work.” You lowered your voice, nearly mumbling the last part. “I can’t take another step back, Buck. Not after three months, and definitely not after that.”
Bucky’s eyes danced between yours for a few moments. They darted down to your marred skin and back again several times before he blew out a breath and nodded reluctantly. 
Your shoulders eased too. 
“Now come back here and kiss me, soldier. Your girl’s in need.” You smiled, quirking a playful brow in an attempt to draw him back in.
It worked. That smile pulled at his lips, small at first but quickly blooming as you began peppering his jaw with kisses.
The kisses started gentle and exploring, and the touches soft and sweet. You hadn’t felt his skin against yours for three long months, save for two days ago, and you’d missed everything that made him Bucky.
You’d missed how the stubble of his chin brushed your cheeks when you kissed, and how he held your face like you were the most precious thing he’d ever touched. Delicate and worthy of worship.
You’d missed him so much it hurt.
“Bucky,” you panted, tugging his shirt as you kissed him. “I love you.”
A deep, rumbling groan left him, and his tongue swept across your bottom lip. “I love you, Y/N. So damn much.”
His flesh hand cupped the back of your neck and guided your head to the side so he could place the tenderest kisses over each hickey Winter had left. “He’s a brute,” Bucky mumbled against the column of your throat, stealing your breath. “If he hurts you–.”
“He won’t, James.” You pressed your forehead to his shoulder, biting your lip as his flesh hand trailed all the way from your neck to the base of your spine. “I know it.”
You only got a hum in response before his lips crashed into yours again. Bucky’s hands were everywhere, confident and warm on one side and tentative and gentle with the other, much colder one. The contrast sent delicious tingles along your skin wherever he touched and only served to heighten your anticipation.
This was the first time Bucky himself had allowed so much of a brush of his metal arm against you, let alone tender touch.
His palms mapped every dip and crest of your body, his touch growing more needy with each sweep of his skin against yours. His tongue slid over your lips again, a silent request that you were all too happy to accept.
You couldn’t help the satisfied sound that escaped you as the taste of him swept over you, familiar and strong. Things only hastened from there. It was like a switch had flipped and he couldn’t bear not to have his hands on you.
He kissed you hard, chasing you with lips and tongue like a man starved. The feather light touches of his hands turned more firm as he held your hips and pulled you closer. Bucky’s chest heaved, his breaths fanning over you between kisses in hot puffs.
You could tell he was still holding back. That he needed this as much as the burning need in your core told you that you did. “Bucky,” the sound was practically a whine, “Please.”
His fingers curled against your hips, “Fuck. Okay, okay.” Wet kisses were trailed down your neck as his hands slipped beneath your shirt to sweep calloused thumbs over your aching nipples. “Say them, doll. Say the words.”
You deserved a fucking gold metal for succeeding to pull your mind out of the fog he’d clouded your brain with. It always happened with him. Your mind just short circuited every time he cast you a heated glance, and this? Well, it was a miracle you could remember your own name.
You opened your mouth, the words you’d memorized tumbling out one after another. 
“Longing.” Bucky grunted, but didn’t stop in his ministrations as you spoke the next. 
“Rusted.” Another grunt, and a tremor through his shoulders, but his lips never left your skin. In fact, it just seemed to spur him further as his hands tugged your shirt down to reveal the delicate skin of your breasts.
“Furn-,” you gasped as his lips locked onto a nipple, tongue teasing expertly over the nub. “Furnace.”
The hum he released sent skittering tingles across your body in the most delicious way.
“Finish, baby.” 
Fucking hell. What was the next word?
“Daybreak,” his hands lowered to your ass and held it firmly against him as he licked and sucked the sensitive skin of your breasts, never missing a beat. “Seventeen.”
Those devilish hands dragged lower, fingers trailing along the seam of your panties through your leggings and along the underside of your thighs where they met the curve of your ass. Inches from where you needed him most.
You could barely suck in a breath, utterly overwhelmed by the sensation of his mouth on your skin and those hands mapping your body in agonizingly slow strokes that sent waves of need straight to your core. “Benign,” his body arched over yours, easing you into the mattress, “Nine.”
Another shudder this time, and you could see the ripple of muscle beneath that tight black shirt. God did you want it off of him.
“Homecoming.” 
A groan, and a shake of his head. It was the first indicator that he was uncomfortable.
 You hesitated at the pained sound, but you didn’t have time to ask a thing though. Not when his head snapped up and those wide, wild blue eyes found yours. “Don’t stop,” he panted, cheeks flushed.
So you didn’t.
“One.”
Wet lips trailed kisses down the exposed skin of your stomach, the tips of his dark hair trailing down as he kissed past your naval and kept going. Lower, lower, lower…
“Freight Car.” The words sounded strangled in your throat through your labored breathing.
The kisses stopped abruptly, and Bucky’s body went stock still.
You weren’t even sure he was breathing until the even rush of an exhale swept against your stomach.
And then he chuckled.
 It wasn’t the kind you’d normally hear from Bucky. It wasn’t filled with joy, or playfulness. This one sounded depraved and downright corrupt.
The hairs on your neck raised, and that sharp bite of panic jolted through you as you stared down at his large frame hovering over you. You couldn’t see his face from this angle, and the lack of any hint of what was going through his head only heightened the tension building in your body.
“Told you, didn’t I?” His voice was a rumble in the silence, and you gasped when his tongue swept a path up the center of your belly. “You fucking need me.”
Cold fingers hooked the waistband of your leggings and shucked them off in one quick motion, the cool air assaulting your exposed skin and leaving goosebumps in its wake. You simply stared up at him and tried to remember to breathe beneath the weight of his eyes on your body.
Those cold, lust-lidded eyes.
“Winter,” you breathed, a thrum of excitement mingling with the nerves tingling under your skin. The ache you felt was at the forefront of your mind. Bucky’s gentle touches had served to stir the need that was already brewing.
Now, Winter has come to finish the job.
He smiled, slow and sultry. “Needy little thing, aren't you, Dollface?”
You bit your lip as heat crept up your neck.
Winter’s body rose to his knees, his hands curling around your thighs in a bruising grip and lifting them over his shoulders. You yelped, but it didn’t stop him. Those thick corded forearms locked your legs in place over his shoulders, his face centimeters from your core and the stubble of his jaw tickling your thighs.
You were almost certain you'd soaked through the thin pair of panties you wore.
His hands dragged up your thighs, fingers slipping beneath the fabric at your hips as he held your eyes. 
And then he ripped them at the seams. The puny fabric fell to the mattress in tatters, and all you could do was gawk at him.
“Don’t wear those when you’re with me.” Winter ordered against your thigh, his tongue swiping a path up the inner stripe of skin. 
The action sent another wave of want through you, the anticipation of what he was going to do serving to build your nerves higher and higher.
He drew you closer by your hips, humming against your skin. The sweep of hot air over you was a welcome sensation and you arched into it. Your heart pounded, and the angle in which your body was held, your head still resting against the mattress along with your shoulders, made it hard to think. 
Winter stopped just short of brushing his lips over your sensitive clit. You could’ve cried right then and there. Blinking up at him, you caught the wicked grin plastered on his face.
The soldier above you looked downright god-like bathed in the dim light of the room. His eyes gleamed, and that silver arm danced with every move he made. Every devious stroke of cool fingers against your body.
You knew this exact image would be carved into your mind for the rest of your life.
“Beg for it,” he ordered, his grip turning nearly bruising. “Tell me how badly you want it.” His lips brushed your core, just a whisper of scruff on your sensitive skin. 
You squirmed in response, chasing the feeling. Normally, you would rather die than beg a man for anything. But Winter? He had a special way of breaking you down. “Please, Winter, please. I-I want you. I want you to–.”
He didn’t even let you finish before his tongue delved into your core. 
You felt every sweep, every brush of that expert muscle laving over you. Desperate, needy sounds were echoing through your room, and a part of you knew they were yours. That they were spilling from your parted lips in broken sentences begging him for more. You were too focused on where his tongue toyed with you to care about anything else, though. Every pass of his tongue on your clit, or a sweep against your clenching walls made it harder and harder to ground yourself.
You were crawling closer and closer to the edge.
Your fingers were curled into the bedspread, and your hips ground into his face and bucked against the solid grip of his arms over your thighs. Winter groaned into your heat, the rumbling vibrations pushing you closer to euphoria.
Dazed, you tried to focus on his face, tried to make out his features in your love-drunk state. 
Winter's eyes were closed, and his face never came up once for air. Not even when you could feel his chest shuttering, and those muffled grunts became more frequent.
And God did they feel good.
Your chest heaved, your legs trying and failing to move an inch against his iron grip. As those vibrating groans shoved you over the edge with a cry.
Your brain couldn’t focus, not with all the blood rushing through your head and the thundering sound of your own heart in your ears, or the blissful sensation of release crashing over you in waves. 
“So dirty, Dollface. Letting me ruin you like this.” Winter eased his grip on your shaky legs, his hands dragging up your thighs to grip your hips. “Letting me brand you, taste you…” He licked his lips, tasting you on his stubbled face. His body leaned forward, your legs parting around his hips as he planted a burning kiss to your lips, “Fucking perfect.”
You panted, blinking to focus on his words as you came back to yourself.
Winter was lifting himself off of you, his eyes raking over your disheveled form as he slipped off the bed and stood to his full height. Those blue eyes held nothing but burning desire, muscles flexing as he yanked off his shirt and rewarded you with the view of his sweat slicked torso. 
The sight was erotic. His hair damp with sweat, and his face glossy with the remnants of your release, chest heaving as he sucked in much needed air.
Winter reached forward, his cool fingers wrapping around your ankle and tugging you towards the edge of the bed with a wicked grin. “Gonna make you come again, Dollface. Need to hear those pretty sounds you make.” His flesh hand grabbed your calf, pulling you closer. “Wanna hear my name on your lips again, and again, and again.”
His metal fingers gripped your thigh hard enough to leave bruises, but that didn’t bother you. You loved the reminders that littered your skin from the last time Winter branded you with his affections, and you relished each one that would follow. 
With a quick, strong motion, he flipped you on your stomach. Your chest bounced against the bedsheets, the friction against your pebbled nipples sent a jolt of pleasure down to your toes making you moan into the comforter as he brought your hips up and adjusted your knees against the bed.
“Fuck, you’re gorgeous.” He panted, pressing himself against your ass.
You could feel him through the sweats still hanging from his hips. The length of him pressed firmly against you, brushing your sensitive core and making you groan again. You wanted to feel him, needed to know what it was like to be with Winter the same way you craved intimacy with his counterpart.
“Please,” You begged. 
With a grunt, the sweats were yanked down and he thrust harshly, seating himself completely in one swift motion.
His moan rumbles through you, setting your nerves alight. “Oh god…”
And then he starts moving. 
One stark difference between James Buchanan Barnes and The Winter Soldier, was that one was gentle and kind, and everything you’d want in the man you’d take home to meet your parents. And the other? The other was the kind of man that would carve his name into your skin with a smile and defile you in unspeakable ways, rough and raw.
Winter snapped his hips at a breakneck pace, pulling out only to plunge back in with a force that made you see stars. Your mouth hung open in a silent scream, clinging to the sheets as he drove you into the mattress. His cock hit all the right places, those quick, constant motions driving you closer and closer to another release. His grunts and puffs of breath only added momentum.
Tears pricked your eyes, your heart hammering and your skin on fire as pleasure coursed through you, building higher and higher.
A cold palm slipped along your belly, snaking its way between your breasts and firmly wrapping around your neck, squeezing those delicate pressure points that made your head spin. He lifted you from the mattress, his pace halting almost completely as your back met his heaving chest. 
Winter’s raw voice met your ears as you whimpered at the loss of friction, teetering on the edge of sanity as your core wept for attention. “Gonna cum if I keep that up, Dollface.” His voice is choppy, puffs of air hitting the side of your neck as he talks. “Feel so fuckin’ good.”
His dick pushes in again, dragging slowly along your walls as he groans in your ear, your own voice joining him in a broken harmony. “‘M gonna need this every time. Need to feel your tight cunt, hear your pretty cries…” His tongue darted out to slide over your cheek, swiping up a tear that had fallen from your damp lashes, “Taste you every. Single. Time.”
Those hips snapped back into their brutal pace, slamming against your ass as he clutched your frail neck in his metal hand, the other coming up to grip your hair and tug your head back as he sucked more love bites along your neck.
You moan, tears of pleasure falling from your lashes as you near the edge. Winter’s grunts and shaky breath vaguely registering that he’s nearly there himself.
He sinks his teeth into the juncture of your neck, the combination of pain and utter pleasure shoving you over the precipice as you open your mouth in a scream. That metal hand snakes up to stifle it as his hips jerk a few more agonizing thrusts before shuddering with his strangled moan.
You’re left limp and breathless, utterly spent and draped over his arm with your head lolling against his strong and heaving shoulder.
Winter slips from you, repositioning you on the bed like an offering on an unholy altar. With his hair plastered against his forehead, those dark strands utterly soaked with sweat, he smiles down at you.
“Again.”
Tags<3
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imawreck · 27 days ago
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are you alive?! 🥲☕️🍪
Yes! I took a break for the holidays and celebrated my 21st birthday, so it’s been a busy break! I’m working on several projects that will hopefully be done by this month! Happy belated holidays to those who celebrate! 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻
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imawreck · 2 months ago
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I’m so glad you guys enjoyed it! 🥹
Moments Stolen
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader
Summary: You take some time to spend with your favorite person.
Author’s Note: I felt sad and had a little idea so now all of you have to suffer too. I wrote it in like 15 minutes so it’s short, sorry.
Warnings: This is straight up angst, don’t be fooled.
Word Count: 504
The sun was warm on your face, bright in the cloudless sky. It was fall, normally chilly this time of year, but today was bright and the wind was kind and gentle as it kissed your cheeks.
Leaves crunched under your boots as you made your way through the field, following the stone path like you always did.
The nice weather made today all the better. It was the kind of weather that made you want to spend time with your favorite person, so that’s what you’d decided to do.
You’d spent the day with Bucky, your favorite person by far.
You’d talked with him, planted flowers— peach tulips, your favorites. Bucky always said he liked them too, so you’d brought them to plant together. You’d talked about old times, laughing and recalling silly memories together as you packed the dirt around the last bulb, smiling down at your work before you pulled out a few wipes and cleaned up before setting out the picnic you’d brought.
A sigh left you as you plopped down onto the blanket, fishing out the sandwiches you’d backed and unwrapping one. “I know it’s a little late to be planting flowers, especially with the cold coming, but they looked pretty and it just felt like the perfect activity for today.”
Bucky’s chuckle carried on the breeze, and you smiled to yourself at the sound.
“Maybe they’ll live, who knows! We can just plant them again next year if they don’t, right?” You shook your head, still smiling. “Yeah, I’ll just bring more next year. It can be our new thing. We can plant a whole garden and drive your allergies crazy.”
He laughed again, and it stirred butterflies in your stomach and made your eyes sting.
You leaned back, closing your eyes and letting the last rays of the setting sun soak into your skin as you sat in the comforting silence.
It was moments like these you enjoyed spending with Bucky the most. You both enjoyed the quiet, easy moments. You’d always end up together when things finally slowed down at the tower, or when you’d both have a day off at the same time. It was these kinds of things you’d end up doing. Just random impulsive things you’d normally never do but did just for the joy of doing it together.
You’d missed it.
“Well, I’m sure I’ll be getting calls soon.” You pushed off the ground, dusting yourself off and gathering your things. “I enjoyed today. Always do when I spend them with you, Buck.”
You reached over, smiling as you dusted the dirt off his face and made sure he looked good as new. “I’ll visit with you next weekend. Same day, same time.”
Leaning down, you placed a lingering kiss on the cold black marble. It made you miss his warmth, but this would do. Pulling away to gaze down at the neatly carved letters that accompanied a picture of the two of you, you whispered to the wind. “Love you, James.”
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imawreck · 2 months ago
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UPDATE and changes to the story (sorry)
Hey! For those of you who enjoyed reading/are reading my Project G.H.O.S.T fic, there’s a few changes! I made a dumb mistake while writing it that I just realized while rewatching the movies and working on the continuation in New Beginning. The chapter of Project G.H.O.S.T titled ‘Trap’ has been edited. It’s absolutely critical information in the story so I’d advise rereading that one chapter/paragraph so you know what’s up and aren’t confused! I have colored the changes green to find it easier.
—Ayden
@greatmistakes / @cjand10 / @greatenthusiasttidalwave / @calwitch / @blackbirdwitch22 / @imdoingathingmom / @readawaythereality2
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imawreck · 2 months ago
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New Beginning (Sort Of)
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Original Character, Steve Rogers x Original Character (Platonic?)
Summary: Max is back in the game, but it’s far bigger than she expected. And more deadly. Old wounds are reopened, and tragedy strikes again.
Author's Note: Getting back into writing Max is going to be interesting, got a lot planned for her in this continuation.
Warnings: Mostly plot building, mentions of hostage, violence, canonic MCU drama, you know the drill at this point.
Word Count: 3,110
Max-
“Please, please! I swear I’ll get you the money, you have my word!” 
I’d heard it a thousand times by now. Different faces and voices, different people, but always the same words. 
“Sure, Carlos. That’s what you said to Mr. Franks when he made the deal six months ago.” I turned to the man strung up on the wall behind me. “Then again three months ago when he sent his goons to gather it and you didn’t have it. I’m the last collector.”
This whole thing was beginning to bore me. There was no excitement in this for me. In the whole Mercenary thing I’d decided to pick up to pay the bills, I mean. It was repetitive and frankly way too easy. 
I sighed, slouching into the chair I’d hauled from my victim’s rather expensive looking living room. How did I end up here? I was going to start a new life; a new me. But here I was again killing and maiming like I had done before.
Now, there was just no point to it all anymore. No purpose for me.
What a bleak existence I live.
“If you don’t have the money, Carlos,” I sighed, throwing my head back as I sprawled over the chair. “Then I’m going to have to take payment in blood. You don’t want that, do you?”
“No! No, por favor, I have a family! Kids!”
The poor man looked as miserable as I felt. Probably should’ve thought more on the drug dealer job if he had little ones.
“The money, then, Carlos. Otherwise—.”
“This is what you ran away to do?”
My heart leapt into my throat at that familiar snarky voice. The tone, the attitude, the nearness of the response. One I hadn’t heard in years.
I opened my eyes slowly, leaning up to pear over the back of the chair I’d thrown myself over.
I’ll be damned.
“How the hell did you find me?”
There, in all his American glory, was Steve Rogers. And I mean all the glory; suit, shield, and boots to match.
With his brows furrowed, and his mouth downturned in a surprisingly bearded face, he answered. “It took a lot of favors, and a lot of dead ends.” 
“Not enough, clearly.” I mumbled, easing out of the chair with my eyes laser focused on him. He could try to kill me, for all I knew. Why the hell was he here?
Steve’s frown deepened, “What is this, a torture chamber?” He nodded up at Carlos who I’d strung up with bedsheets in such a way that he’d dangle from the rather high ceiling of his home by the arms.
I was still trying to connect the dots on how the hell he was here, of all places. How had he managed to hunt me down?
 “It’s Carlo’s living room,” I answered, cringing a little at how stupid it sounded. “He’s a drug dealer.”
Those thick brown eyebrows rose in a ‘Are you serious right now,’ kind of way that only made me feel more ridiculous. Damn him and his ridiculing-ass.
“Max,” his arms crossed over his chest, “What are you doing?”
Why the fuck did I feel guilty? Here he is showing up in my corner of the world after four long years and accusing me of making a living the only way I know how. The only way I could, considering no one would hire me for something as simple as a waitress job with no birth certificate, resume, or any paper trail anywhere.
An ember of anger ignited in my gut, twisting my face into something I’d imagine looked rather unpleasant. Disdain, perhaps. “I’m making a fucking living, Rogers. And you’re interrupting a very important conversation.” I jerked my thumb over to poor Carlos, “He was just about to fess up.”
Steve’s eyes dragged from the man dangling from the ceiling and back to me in a slow manner, “Right.”
I decided right then that any remorse I had felt for leaving him disoriented and unconscious in that hospital chair four years ago was idiotic and obviously a slip in my sanity. “Are you here for casual visitation like old friends or is there a reason for this unpleasant interruption?”
The smile he shot me was very forced. It tickled me pink that my mere existence caused his normally infinite patience to evaporate. “I’m here,” he shook his head, blowing out a breath and seeming to deflate with the exhale. When he looked back at me, the emotions there surprised me enough to let him finish. “To ask you to come back.”
He had to be fucking joking, right?
“What?” I stared long and hard at him, trying desperately to find a quirked lip or something to tell me he was just pulling my leg. “You want me to come back?”
“Yes.”
I blinked at him, wiping my hands on the Kevlar vest I wore. I was suddenly very aware of how shaky my hands were, and the thundering sound of Carlos’ heart in my sensitive ears. 
I wasn’t the hero type and we both knew it. Not that it really mattered, it never had. I was always more… immoral than my fellow super-humans. But to ask me, of all people, to come back to the save-the-world squad was something I never thought they’d ask of me. Let alone Steve himself to be the one here to do it.
Whatever was going on must be something truly terrible to ask for my help.
“Why?”
“Would you let the man go first?” Steve nodded his head at the dangling man behind me, a lock of hair swaying over his forehead. He didn’t used to have so much hair.
I rolled my eyes, spinning around to stare up at Carlos. “Listen, Losey. Today just might be your lucky day.” I ran my fingers through my hair, braiding the wild white strands all the way down to my hip and tying it off before I planted my hands on my hips, “I’m going to let you go, but here’s what you’re going to do.”
I walked toward where I’d neatly tied the ends of the bedsheets that held him up, talking as I went. “You’re going to pay Mr. Franks what you owe him as soon as you’re out of this building. I know you have it, so you better do as I say or I’ll be one unhappy person when I’m done cleaning up whatever Cap wants over there. Deal?”
“Sí! No problemo, señorita.” 
“Don’t make me regret this, Carlos.” I drew my hand up and tugged one of the knots free, watching him drop unsteadily to his feet and struggle out of the second restraint before running out the front door without a glance back.
So much for my paycheck.
“So,” I turned back to Steve, eyeing him warily, “Are you going to tell me why you want me to come back to the team or do I have to guess?”
———
Steve- 
Max had changed. 
She looked different, for starters. My last memory of her looked like a stranger compared to the woman standing in front of me. Where there was once short hair was now long, wild waves that faded to crimson red at the ends. The frailty in which she had about her when she escaped the tower was long gone and replaced with muscle that filled out the suit she wore. She seemed less wild and more reserved. Almost like she’d mellowed out in her time away. 
Maybe she had. We’d all changed since she left.
“We should go somewhere more private.” I took a look around at the room, at the windows and lavish furniture. “Somewhere secure.”
She scoffed, a clawed finger coming up to sweep away a stray hair from her face. That was also new. Her nails—clawed at the tips— we’re on full display and painted red to match her hair. “Please, Rogers. I was going to kill a man in his living room and you thought I wouldn’t secure the place first? It hurts, really.” 
Her hand waved to the windows, “They’re one-way, and I’ve debugged the place already. We’re completely secure so long as we’re in this room.”
“Why does that not surprise me?” I sighed, looking her over as she shrugged her shoulders.
“I like to be consistent.” She clipped, shooting me a fanged grin that gave me a glimpse of the old Max. “Now out with it.”
“You should sit,” I motioned to a chair neatly placed around the small glass coffee table in the room and I took a seat on the couch. She stared at me for a moment, as if she was debating whether to book it or not.
Eventually she sat.
“A lot has changed since you left,” I began. “Tony created a robot that nearly killed us all. Then The Accords were passed—.”
“The hell are The Accords?” Max leaned forward, her elbows on her knees and her hands interlaced. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, Steve, but I’ve been living under a proverbial rock for the last four years to stay off your radar.”
Right.
I tapped my thumbs on my knees, trying to think of where to even start explaining the whole ordeal. “It was an agreement between nations regarding the limitation and regulation of enhanced individuals.”
She stared, eyebrows raising, “Gonna need more than that, Rogers. Mind reading isn’t my superpower, unfortunately.”
A pang of irritation shot through me at her comment, as it did every time I talked with her. “It means that the government is in charge of registering each enhanced individual into a system with DNA and fingerprints, birth certificates, and anything that identifies that individual. People like you and Wanda? The ones with powers? They have to be monitored and analyzed through a bracelet.”
“Shit. Are you serious?” Max’s face twisted in shock and horror.
I nodded, “The enhanced individuals can only help in their own countries unless they’re approved by the UN. And if you break that rule? They detain you without a trial.”
“Fuck.” She muttered, her claws clacking together as she twisted her interlaced hands. “That’s bad. Really bad.”
“It ended up splitting the Avengers.” I added, wincing when her head snapped up and her eyes caught the light like they did the first time I’d met her. I’d never get used to that animalistic glint. “Tony, Nat, Peter, T’Challa, and a few others agreed. The rest of us didn’t, because it infringed on our rights, and it’s just not ethical.”
Max nodded, listening with that sort of expression that told me she was anything but happy with what I was saying.
“Bucky was framed for a terrorist bombing that killed the King of Wakanda. He had taken off some time after you left. The government wanted him taken into custody, but I knew Buck wouldn’t have done something like that. I knew he was in hiding, and he wouldn’t do something like that when he was trying to stay low.” I dropped my eyes to look at anything other than her face.
I knew what I was going to say would put a wall between her and Tony. I knew they’d been close before she disappeared, and asking her to take my side would add a nail to a coffin that shouldn’t be there. “Tony agreed that Bucky should be apprehended. They have history. Bucky… he was the one that—.”
“He killed Tony’s parents.” 
I looked up at her, surprised. “You knew?”
Max had a far off look in her eyes as she nodded, blinking a few times as if to help clear her eyes. “It was a long time ago, but I was there. Still with Hydra at the time, and I was shadowing him to make sure the job was done.” Her voice lowered and shame wove into her words. “I’ve known for a while. From the first time I heard Tony’s last name when you brought me in from that base. I wasn’t… I wasn’t right in the head back then. I was still what they’d made me to be. I figured it would just be better to leave it in the past.”
I nodded, “Well, Tony did what he always does and decided it was either his way or you’re done.” Pursing my lips, I recalled the tension as we’d all argued over the Accords. “We were nearly split down the middle on votes. I wasn’t about to let Bucky get dragged down for something like this. He doesn’t deserve that.”
Max shook her head in agreement, her face hardened in anger. “You caught who did it, right?”
“Yeah, he’s behind bars now.” Hopefully forever.
“Good, otherwise we’d have to take a detour to take care of that.” Max leaned back, throwing a leg over the arm of the chair in a rather unladylike manner. 
I leaned back too, “After we handled our… disagreement, those who were in disagreement with the Accords went into hiding. Until now.”
Max’s hand flew up to smack against her chest as she mock-gasped, “You? Captain America? In hiding? I never thought I’d see the day where you became a seasoned criminal, Rogers.”
I couldn’t help the sneer I sent her, but I quickly tried to compose myself. “I’m not a criminal, Max. I was fighting against an unethical policy.”
“I’m kidding, Cap. I agree with you.” Her face grew serious. “I’m glad you did what you did. You aren’t wrong.”
That feeling of irritation dwindled some, and I relaxed a bit. “Now there’s something coming that could destroy everything we know. You’re one of the strongest people I know, and we’re going to need every ounce of strength we have to go against this thing.” 
This was the moment that would make or break this whole plan. Max was a key player in this, whether she knew it or not. We needed her.
“We need you to help us fight. Your abilities are unmatched and we could really use that out there with us.” I clenched my teeth as I waited for her response. I wasn’t used to feeling anxious.
She sat there for a minute, her eyes scanning over my face as she mulled over my words. The old Max would’ve pounced on the opportunity to fight. She had a hunger for blood.
This Max? I wasn’t so sure she’d agree at all.
“There’s a few things that I need to ask you before I consider answering.” Her nails clicked together as she dropped her eyes to the coffee table in thought. “If I come with you, can you guarantee Wanda won’t try and kill me?”
I hadn’t thought about that.
“No,” I said slowly, “I can’t promise that. But this issue is bigger—.”
“I killed her only family, Steve. Nothing is bigger than that. Not for her. It wouldn’t be for me.” The agony I saw in her eyes was harrowing. It was all too similar to the look Bucky often wore. “I will defend myself, and I don’t want it to come at the expense of her life.” Max’s mouth twisted into a pitying frown and she leaned forward. “I think you’re here alone, and if that’s the case, then the others don’t know you’re here to ask for my help. This won’t go over well, Steve. You know that.” She shook her head slowly, “I’m not the hero type.”
“Max, they’ll have to understand. We need you for this.” I reached across the coffee table and snagged her hand. The action obviously surprised her, but she didn’t pull away. I closed my hand around hers and held it tight, “Please, Max. I wouldn’t ask you to come back if it wasn’t important.” I squeezed her hand, small and cold, “I know you left to work through what happened to you on your own. I understand you needed space. Tony told us a little from the letter you left that night. This is something that can’t be ignored for anything though, Max. You have to believe me.”
We might’ve never been close before she left the tower, but we had shared something while trapped in her mind that night. I had felt something, a connection, and I knew we shared an understanding even if it was barely a sliver.
Her head nodded, white hairs slipping free from her braid. “Okay, Steve. I just… I can’t promise anything. I take lives, it’s what I’m good at. I’m not good at saving them. The ones I’ve tried to save have always ended up worse off than before.”
She looked so small sitting in that chair saying this to me. I realized then that this was her first taste of true freedom, and she didn’t have any tools to help her navigate the world. Sure, she’d spent some time with us at the tower, but that wasn’t freedom either. Not truly.  Max had only known cruelty and abuse, or surveillance and bloodshed. She didn’t have friends or a mentor or resources. She didn’t exist as far as anyone knew but the handful of hero’s she’d met through the Avengers. 
She had nothing, and I had shamed her for acting by the only way of life she knew.
“I’ll be in your corner.” I gave her hand another squeeze, “I know we don't normally see eye to eye, probably won’t on a lot of things, but I’ve had a lot of time to think about the way I treated you. About what you’ve been through. I’m sorry. I was an asshole, and I shouldn’t have been so hard on you.”
A small, teasing smile curled her lips. “Did you just curse?”
“Don’t tell the team.”
Her laugh was soft, and it pulled a smile from me too. 
“So you’ll come with me?” I was hopeful for a lot of reasons. Max would help exponentially as an ally, sure. But I also felt that if she returned, that maybe she would mend the parts of Bucky that had shattered with her absence.
She had left him empty in her escape. They both had so much misunderstanding between them, so much unsaid. Bucky had told me as much sometime after she’d left. He was drowning in guilt and regret, and the fear of his own mind that he carried with him always. Wakanda had promised to help fix what Hydra had done to him, and from what I’ve heard, his time there had helped his mental health greatly.
I just hoped she would help him too.
This was the first step in saving the world, and maybe even my old friend.
Tags <3
@greatmistakes / @cjand10 / @greatenthusiasttidalwave / @calwitch / @blackbirdwitch22 / @imdoingathingmom / @readawaythereality2
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imawreck · 2 months ago
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New Beginning Masterlist
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Original Character
Summary: Max has been gone for four years, and much has changed. The Avengers are disbanded, Bucky has gone to fix his hijacked mind, and war is upon Earth. Will she stand beside her old friends and fight, or will she remain a Ghost?
Warnings: This story contains a lot of dark subjects, gore, betrayal, and drama. So, readers be warned! Every chapter will have brief warnings, so be sure to read those if you're sensitive to certain subjects. Read at your own risk!
Author's Note: Thank you for reading this far! If you're new, go check out the beginning of this series on my masterlist under Project G.H.O.S.T. Masterlist!
New Beginning (Sort of)
Ally
(In Progress)
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imawreck · 2 months ago
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Moments Stolen
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader
Summary: You take some time to spend with your favorite person.
Author’s Note: I felt sad and had a little idea so now all of you have to suffer too. I wrote it in like 15 minutes so it’s short, sorry.
Warnings: This is straight up angst, don’t be fooled.
Word Count: 504
The sun was warm on your face, bright in the cloudless sky. It was fall, normally chilly this time of year, but today was bright and the wind was kind and gentle as it kissed your cheeks.
Leaves crunched under your boots as you made your way through the field, following the stone path like you always did.
The nice weather made today all the better. It was the kind of weather that made you want to spend time with your favorite person, so that’s what you’d decided to do.
You’d spent the day with Bucky, your favorite person by far.
You’d talked with him, planted flowers— peach tulips, your favorites. Bucky always said he liked them too, so you’d brought them to plant together. You’d talked about old times, laughing and recalling silly memories together as you packed the dirt around the last bulb, smiling down at your work before you pulled out a few wipes and cleaned up before setting out the picnic you’d brought.
A sigh left you as you plopped down onto the blanket, fishing out the sandwiches you’d backed and unwrapping one. “I know it’s a little late to be planting flowers, especially with the cold coming, but they looked pretty and it just felt like the perfect activity for today.”
Bucky’s chuckle carried on the breeze, and you smiled to yourself at the sound.
“Maybe they’ll live, who knows! We can just plant them again next year if they don’t, right?” You shook your head, still smiling. “Yeah, I’ll just bring more next year. It can be our new thing. We can plant a whole garden and drive your allergies crazy.”
He laughed again, and it stirred butterflies in your stomach and made your eyes sting.
You leaned back, closing your eyes and letting the last rays of the setting sun soak into your skin as you sat in the comforting silence.
It was moments like these you enjoyed spending with Bucky the most. You both enjoyed the quiet, easy moments. You’d always end up together when things finally slowed down at the tower, or when you’d both have a day off at the same time. It was these kinds of things you’d end up doing. Just random impulsive things you’d normally never do but did just for the joy of doing it together.
You’d missed it.
“Well, I’m sure I’ll be getting calls soon.” You pushed off the ground, dusting yourself off and gathering your things. “I enjoyed today. Always do when I spend them with you, Buck.”
You reached over, smiling as you dusted the dirt off his face and made sure he looked good as new. “I’ll visit with you next weekend. Same day, same time.”
Leaning down, you placed a lingering kiss on the cold black marble. It made you miss his warmth, but this would do. Pulling away to gaze down at the neatly carved letters that accompanied a picture of the two of you, you whispered to the wind. “Love you, James.”
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imawreck · 2 months ago
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I promise I’m working on it! Thank you so much for your support, it really means the world to me! 🫶🏻🥹
His
Pairing: Winter Soldier x Reader
Summary: You and Bucky broke up a few months ago against your wishes, and you’d been trying to move on. When Bucky sees you flirting with another member of the team, he leaves for the next mission to avoid getting in your way. Unfortunately, the mission goes bad, and Bucky isn’t himself when he comes back. He also has a lot to say…
Author’s Note: I realize that in most of my fics Thor is the other romantic interest/situationship, but you CANT tell me that man wouldn’t flirt up a storm with a beautiful woman any chance he got. Also, this is my first smutty fic so feedback and comments would be much appreciated! This is on the more explicit side, so please read with caution.
Warnings: Cursing, mentions self loathing/guilt (it’s Bucky, kinda normal), choking kink, Possessive!Winter Soldier, flashbacks, hair pulling, fingering, metal arm kink, dominant!winter soldier, probably some more but those are the big ones.
Word Count: 4,850
Breakups are ugly most of the time, and almost always one sided.
You and Bucky had been apart for at least three months. You’d stopped counting, wanting to forget it and focus on anything else. It was easier that way, to ignore the heartbreak and clutter up your life with other things to do.
Unfortunately, you still lived in the same tower on the same floor, right across from one another. He was constantly around, and no mattered how hard you tried, you just couldn’t avoid him.
It was hell.
And it was only hell because Bucky hardly gave you a good reason for the break up. Sure, you had your arguments. Mostly about his past and how much better he thought you deserved, to which you’d list all the reasons he was wrong. In reality, those weren’t really arguments. It was just Bucky having a low point, which you were more than willing to help him work through. Outside of those moments, you had felt that your relationship with Bucky was near perfect.
So when he had come back from a mission and broke up with you, his only reason being ‘I can’t be with you,’ it’d been a slap to the face. Like someone had shoved a knife in your heart and twisted.
The worst part was that he wouldn’t even allow you the chance to talk to him afterwards. Every time you were in the same room together alone, he’d find every reason not to speak with you.
So, you’d taken the hint and were now trying to figure out a way to move on.
That was made a little easier when a certain God of Thunder made his interest known to you. Thor was sweet, charming, and a little goofy. Not to mention handsome, with his blonde hair and sky blue eyes.
He’d made an effort to woo you not long after you’d parted from Bucky, and you’d informed him that the breakup was hard for you and that you couldn’t really do something new right now. Thor had been surprisingly understanding, and even took to just being friends quite well. Granted, he was still flirty, but he knew where you both stood and was always happy to lend an ear when you needed one.
He turned out to be just the friend you needed.
From the outside looking in, none of the others thought it was ‘just friends,’ especially when Thor would openly show his interest in you. Especially to a certain Super Soldier.
Bucky was painfully aware of what was going on between you and Thor even though he desperately tried not to be.
His super hearing picked up on the soft laughter you and the god would share, on the hushed whispers you’d exchange late over a mug of coffee when you thought everyone was asleep. His every fiber was attuned to you, and he couldn’t help but fixate on your presence.
You were like gravity to him, and he always found himself near you when he knew he should be as far as humanly possible. He saw the little looks you shared when Thor would compliment you, noticed your shy smile when the god would enter the room. He could tell that Thor was winning you over slowly but surely.
He couldn’t fucking stand it.
So it wasn’t a big surprise when he shipped off on the next mission possible.
You worried, your heart still set on loving him, but you tried to pay it little mind. And after a few days, it actually helped. You felt better, found yourself smiling more. You were beginning to move forward.
That was, until the jet was reported missing. Then Bucky was all anyone could talk about in the tower.
Thor tried his best to keep you in the dark about most of what was going on, and it wasn’t hard seeing as you were just a rather good strategist and not a serious Avenger. You were only really included in skimming over preplanned attacks and making sure they hadn’t missed anything critical.
But word still spread, and worry was ever present.
Needless to say, it was very strange when Mr. Stark called you into a private meeting with himself and two other of the elite team.
“Y/N,” He spoke softly in the kind of tone that lets you know that whatever he says next is going to ruin your whole week. “There’s a situation with Barnes.”
You frowned, eyebrows scrunching at him from where you sat at the rather empty end of the long black table. “I’m confused. Bucky and I broke up months ago. Why are you talking to me about it?”
Steve, who you’d befriended while dating his best pal, looked at you with poorly concealed pity from his seat next to Stark. “Because we know he still means a lot to you and that you’re our best hope in this situation.”
That didn’t make you feel better about whatever was going on at all. “What do you mean ‘this situation?’” You eyed them both, before dragging your eyes over to Doctor Banner who hadn’t done much more than stare at you with a concerned expression bordering on panic.
Stark pressed his fingers to his forehead, “Barnes got triggered on his mission and has infiltrated the tower. We have reason to believe he’s after you.”
You gaped at him. That didn’t make any sense. You weren’t important, at least not as important as one of The Avengers. “Me? Why me?”
“We’ve silently shut the building down and we’re working on evacuating the floors without anyone freaking out.” Tony went on, ignoring your questions, “He doesn’t know that we’re aware he’s here, and we’re trying to keep it that way.” Tony motioned towards a monitor, and the image of Bucky popped up on the screen.
Only he was in your room, and he was dragging his fingers over the picture of the two of you that was perched on the nightstand. They way his fingers smoothed over the glass, the slight pinch in his brows as if calculating instead of recalling. It was like he’d never seen it before in his life. Like he had no connection to the image of himself.
It was a picture he had taken, his arm extended and a smile on his face with your lips pressed to his cheek. You had meant to take it down and stuff it in the box under your bed with all the other memories you had hid from sight, but it was just too painful. You needed something to hold onto.
You watched through the screen as he moved around your room, taking note of certain things and taking careful precautions to ensure that anything he moved was set right back in place. It was eerie to watch a man who was once so comfortable in your space tread with so much hesitance. Like it was the first time he’d been in the space all over again.
“Y/N.” It was Steve’s gentle timbre that brought your attention away from the screen this time. He tried to smile, though it was clearly forced. “We need you to lure him down towards the lower levels. We have to get him to a room where we can better contain him. If he finds out we know he’s back and not… him, then he could snap.”
“You want to use me as bait? For the Winter Soldier?” You stared at them both with wide eyes, panic blooming in your chest. “This is insane!”
Steve sighed, “Y/N… Bucky told me about the incident that happened in the beginning of your relationship.”
Your attention zeroed in on the blonde’s words, your breath hitching.
“He told me what could’ve happened… and what didn’t.”
You walked down the corridor of the Stark tower office floor heading back towards your desk from a late night research meeting with a few of your coworkers. You had decided to stay later than the others so that you could collect and organize the information you needed for the meeting with Mr. Stark the following morning. It was very late, and you were tired, the heels you wore had begun to irritate the soles of your feet hours before.
You clutched the files you collected in your arms, heels clicking on the glossy floors and echoing into the dimly lit corridor. So dim that you didn't see the silhouette of the man standing just feet from you until it was too late.
You only saw a flash of silver before the door beside you was torn open and you were roughly shoved inside. Cleaning supplies clattered onto the floor, spilling liquids over your feet as you cried out. A hand clamped over your mouth, and your head hit the wall with a thunk.
Stormy blue eyes stared at you, cold and unfeeling. Eyes you had seen just days before smiling at you and filled with life.
Your lips moved to say his name against the cool metal of his hand, but his grip on your face was nearly bruising. You could only stare back in fear and attempt to press your body further from him.
He didn't speak, only stared at you and kicked the door to the closet shut.
Fear was a living thing in your stomach, writhing as his eyes snaked down to your red heels and back up again. His head tilted to the side, as if he was trying to remember something. But his eyes remained cold and unrelentingly empty. His flesh hand came up to press a finger threateningly to his lips.
‘Quiet.’
You weren't stupid enough to scream, not with the way he was looking at you, with how close he was. When he removed his hand, you did exactly as he wanted. Silence hung in the small closet, suffocating you. Would he kill you? What did he want? Why hadn't he killed you already?
The cool metal of his palm slipped further down, wrapping around your throat and pressing against your thundering pulse. Your head pounded along with it, and a foggy feeling settled over your mind.
But your lungs still filled with air, and you remained aware. The pressure of his hand was ever present, but it was light enough not to cause real damage... Almost like he didn't want to hurt you.
His tongue darted out to lick his lips, the movement catching your eyes. His body leaned forward, his nose pressing into your neck and his warm breath hitting your skin. Goosebumps rose in its wake, and that lick of fear heightened again. He was acting so strangely, and the longer it went on the more unsettling it was.
When he pulled away, there was a heat in his eyes that wasn’t there before. A hunger, and… and recognition.
“Hello, Beloved.”
“We know that he didn’t hurt you, and that he displayed… certain feelings towards you.” Steve’s voice brought you out of the memory, dragging you back to the reality at hand.
The one where he wants you to put yourself smack dab in the path of the Winter Soldier.
“You’re serious about this?” You blink up at him, trying to gauge if he was joking or not. Level headed as Steve was, you trusted him with your life. But this? This was terrifying and completely unexpected. Ridiculously dangerous.
“It’s the only nonviolent way we can think of. And we’re almost certain there’s no high risk for you.” Steve tried to give you a reassuring smile, tried to hide the hint of unease that shone in his tense shoulders.
“You’ve all lost your mind.” You laugh, sighing and raising your chin. “Okay, I’ll do it.”
Apparently, so had you.
You stared at the metal doors of the elevator, your heart pounding with each toll of the floors passing. This was probably—no, was— the riskiest thing you’d ever done in your life. You trusted Steve and Mr. Stark, but your brain was trained to find the flaws in plans like this. And so many things could go wrong.
“It’s okay, Y/N.” Steve said calmly into your ear, startling you. You’d forgotten they’d given you the earpiece. “I’ll be here the entire time. I’ll guide you through the compound and make sure you stay out of danger.”
You nodded, even though you weren’t sure if they could see you.
“Bucky is leaving your room. We’re going to drop you off in the commons area of your floor. All you have to do is make some noise and then head for the stairwell. Just listen to me, and I’ll get you through this.” Steve sounded so confident in your ear, but it did little to soothe the nerves.
The elevator leveled out, and the doors quietly opened. The large living room opened up before you, unnervingly bright and welcoming despite the danger you knew lurked just down the hall. You stepped out onto the carpet, walking towards the kitchen. Your palms sweat, heart pounding, as you made your way up to the cabinets.
You just had to make some noise. Easy, right?
But your body wouldn’t move.
“Y/N.” Steve’s voice called in your ear again, gently coaxing you from where he watched the cameras. “Make some noise, and then head for the stairs.”
You swallowed, nodding again, and reached with shaky hands towards the cabinet. You grabbed a bowl, and hesitantly set it down on the granite counter. The echoing pok of the ceramic felt too loud in your ears, like a gunshot.
“Good, now move quickly. He’s just down the hall headed your way.”
The words sent a chill down your spine… and something else followed. Something you’d never felt before.
You headed towards the stairs, but your feet felt like lead weights. Like you couldn’t move fast enough even though you knew you were going as fast as you could.
But you could hear the faintest scuff of boots coming behind you and the sound sent your heart into a frenzy.
You raced down the stairs, tripping a few times before righting yourself and continuing your decent down towards the lower levels. Your floor was four levels up from ground level, which meant you had six floors in total to descend before you could get to the containment floor.
Six flights of stairs being chased by The Winter Soldier. A superhuman man who was definitely faster than you, and probably wanted to do something terrible to you. Like a wolf hunting a sheep.
Oh God.
The thought only served to spur the panic rising in you. You kicked up your speed when the door slammed behind you, footsteps pounding after you as the dark silhouette of Bucky Barnes rounded the stairs two flights above.
He took the stairs four at a time, his long legs swallowing up the distance between you. The panic clawed its way up your throat in a strangled cry, and the sound just seemed to quicken his pace.
“I’m not fast enough!” You tried to keep your voice even, tried to keep it quiet in the echoing stairwell so that the soldier behind you would hear.
“You’re almost there, Y/N. Just keep up the pace. Two flights left and—“ but he didn’t get to finish his sentence.
You watched in shocked horror as Bucky’s figure leapt over the railing and plummeted towards the ground. He dropped several flights before his arm snapped out and wrapped around the railing. The sound of metal hitting metal rang out around you as the railing dipped under the crushing pressure.
He hauled himself back onto the stairs just before you. Those cold eyes found yours, dark hair framing sharp features, painting him into something primal. Something wild.
That feeling pounded through you again, skittering along your spine and raising the hairs on the back of your neck. You still couldn’t place it, not with him stepping towards you with a look that promised violence.
You heard Steve’s voice ordering something over the earpiece, but it was distant. It became clearer a moment later. “We’ve got a team heading in. Just… just hang in there.”
You swallowed, but your throat had gone dry in the presence of the assassin before you. His eyes held you in place as his towering form finally stopped a stair below you, leveling with you face to face. So close you could count the stitches in the Kevlar of his suit.
You felt your body shaking, heard your heart thundering in your ears as your chest rose and fell with each short breath you managed to drag into your lungs.
And he watched every move you made.
His head titled to the side exactly like it’d done the first time you’d been trapped with him. His gaze never left you, eyes wandering over your face and heaving chest before that faint look of recognition settled into those hollow eyes.
And then that heat you’d seen before consumed them.
He stepped forward, and you answered with a step back. For each one he took, you pedaled backwards until your body was plastered against the wall. When you tried to flee back up the stairs, his metal hand planted itself against the wall inches from your head.
You were utterly trapped.
Rough Russian left his lips in the softest whisper. The sound was the same as you’d heart him say before, though you didn’t understand it.
Not until now, as the earpiece Steve had given you translated his words as he spoke them.
“Hello again, Beloved.”
Those blue eyes bored into yours, as his other hand came up to brush your cheek with a gentleness you didn’t think he was capable of.
“He’s kept me from you for so long.” Bucky’s body leaned forward, caging you against the wall. His metal hand remained pressed against the wall beside you, and the other dragged across the skin of your neck and shoulder in an almost reverent manner.
Bucky’s— no, this wasn’t Bucky. This was the part of Bucky he kept farthest from you. This was a man known for cruel, unimaginable violence. An assassin known by reputation around the world by both hero and criminal alike and feared by all. This was the Winter Soldier.
Winters lips brushed your jaw, stubble tickling the column of your throat as his voice rumbled against your skin. “Kept you to himself. Never let me touch you. Worried I’d damage you, Beloved. Couldn’t see you needed me.”
His teeth nipped at your skin, and a shiver rolled down your spine in answer. That feeling tugged at your mind again, spurred by his words. But still, you couldn’t place it. Not with your mind consumed by his statements and barely contained yearning.
When his head lifted to find your eyes again, the fingers of his right hand tangled themselves in your hair and pulled hard enough to have your scalp stinging. His next words were guttural and biting, “And then he let you go.”
Winters grip loosened a bit, but his hold on your hair remained. “He pushed you away, and then that god tries to take you from me?” His eyes held you, demanding your utter attention as his head shook slowly, “You don’t belong to him.”
Tugging your lip between your teeth, you clenched your eyes shut. God, you wished Bucky would say that to you. Having Winter here saying these words with Bucky’s voice, Bucky’s face. Touching you with familiar hands…
Heat had begun to pool low in your belly.
The words were spoken in English. “Open your eyes.”
There was no room for objection in his voice, so you did as he said. With his jaw was set in an angry line, and those blue eyes boring into your soul, he leaned in closer. “He thinks that being with you is too dangerous, that you aren’t safe with… with us.”
“What?” Your heart hammered in your chest at his words. It was the first real reason as to why Bucky had broken up with you.
Those silvery blue eyes zeroed on your lips as he spoke again. “He thinks we can’t protect you, that I’ll hurt you. That somehow being further from you keeps you safe from what comes with being what we are.” His metal hand left the wall in favor of brushing over your lower lip and trailing the cool tips of his fingers down to the dip of your breasts and back up to the column of your throat. “I’d never hurt you, not the way he has. Not if you didn’t want it.”
“W-what do you mean?” You just knew he was picking up on how your heart beat harder as his fingers trailed over your skin. Or the way you kept shifting on your feet to stave off the heat thrumming in your veins with an all too familiar want blooming and begging for his hands to explore more.
The faintest hint of a smile graced his face as he gave your hair another gentle tug, then loosened his grip once more. “You like this. I’ve seen how you react with him. How you quietly treasure the marks he leaves on your skin even when he feels nothing but guilt.” That metal hand slipped over your throat again and pressed on your neck exactly as he’d done the first time you’d seen Winter. Your head spun at the pressure, but you could breathe easily under the cool press of his palm as he leaned in, lips brushing your ear as he whispered. “I see how badly you wish he’d touch you with this hand,” he squeezed your neck and loosened it quickly, “How badly you want those marks. How badly you need me.”
You had no words. Nothing to say as he wrung out the truth you’d thought was hidden from him— from Bucky.
Bucky was notorious for avoiding any situation that would make him use the metal arm. He would much rather let it hang there, or act as if he didn’t have it at all. That included when the two of you would get intimate. He never dared to bring it anywhere near you no matter how many times you’d reminded him it was fine, that you weren’t afraid of it. He outright refused to allow it to touch your delicate skin, to let such a catalyst for agony so close to something as precious as you.
Winter knew that you’d secretly craved to feel the cold metal in contrast to his warm skin when he held you. He knew that you would always find it more satisfying when Bucky would lose himself and get rough with you when things got heated. How his flesh hand would leave bruises on your thighs or hips to keep you steady as he thrust himself deeper.
Just the thought had you aching, and here was Bucky’s darker half offering you everything you’d ever wanted.
You were losing your fucking mind.
“You’re wrong,” you whispered, but the words were flimsy and meaningless. He knew the truth, but that didn’t mean you had to say it aloud.
His metal fingers dug into your jaw, his grip near bruising as he tilted your head up to level your eyes with his. “Don’t fucking lie to me, Dollface.” His lips were a hairs-width away, his warm breath fanning over your face.
The scent of him was intoxicating, muddling your mind even further with heady leather and metal invading your nose. The hint of that aftershave you’d missed so much since Bucky broke your heart.
Winter was tearing you apart at the seams.
“Please,” you whispered. Please what? You didn’t know. You could hardly think straight. That feeling was so strong, thrumming along with your pulse and the ache for something. Anything.
“Tell me I’m right.” He mumbled against your skin. Soft lips, a vast contrast to his rough demeanor, to the calloused hand that remained tangled in your hair, trailed down your cheek. “Tell me that you want me. Not the pathetic excuse for a god, or him. That you want me.”
His metal hand released your face, drifting over your neck and dragging over the left side of your chest. He circled once, thumbing over your nipple with a knowing look filled with every sinful promise known to man.
And then he went lower and lower…
His fingers caught the waistband of your leggings, the chill of his fingers raised goosebumps across your stomach, only serving to worsen that burning need.
“Doll,” a command and a question wrapped in one word.
All you had to do was admit your darkest most guarded secret. Confess, and he would give you what you wanted most. What Bucky was too afraid to do.
You opened your mouth, the words tumbling out as he gave your hair another tug.
“I want you.”
That smirk grew just a fraction more, his fingers slipping past your waistband and toying with the hem of your panties.
Fuck, did you wish you’d gone commando today.
“Who am I?” He asked, teeth nipping down your neck hard enough to know they’d leave marks. “I want you to say it, Y/N.”
Those fingers slipped further, rolling over your aching clit in a teasing stroke before he pulled them away again.
If he wasn’t a literal assassin, you’d consider strangling him.
“For fucks sake,” you gripped his arm, your voice unfamiliar in your own ears, ragged and broken. “Winter, please.”
He didn’t waste time, deft, cool fingers dipping into your core with confidence. Soothing that aching heat.
Fuck.
His thumb circled slow as he pumped his fingers, his mouth leaving wet kisses along your jaw up to your lips where he paused long enough to catch a glimpse of your face. You knew you looked like an utter mess, but those blue eyes showed nothing but twisted delight. He leaned forward and tugged your bottom lip between his teeth, bitting hard enough to make you groan.
Winter’s answering grunt of approval urged you further towards the edge of oblivion those perfect metal fingers were working you towards.
God you were so close. Each movement, every touch and bruise he left on your skin pushing you closer and closer. Just a bit more, a fraction more and you’d—
His fingers wrenched away, gone in an instant.
Your eyes, closed from the pleasure just moments ago, snapped open just before the doors to the stairway above and below you burst open. Floods of agents filed through the doors, and a gun fired.
The sharp sound echoed in the confined space making you flinch. Winters back pressed you against the wall, a solid shield of muscle keeping you out of harms way.
Then the weight was too heavy. His body crushing you as he slumped toward the floor. You screamed, immediately thinking the worse as your eyes searched his form in a panic.
But you found no blood, thank God.
“He’s fine, Y/N.”
Steve’s hand on your shoulder had you flinching back, head snapping to his suit clad form. “The gun—“
“It’s just a tranq. I promise, Bucky will be fine.” His face was the picture of practiced reassurance.
A horde of agents rushed forward and cuffed Winters hands and dragged his unconscious body out of the stairwell and further towards the confinement room. Steve remained with you, his eyes flicking to your neck a few times and checking you over to make sure no serious damage had been done.
When you’d gotten yourself back to your room away from the prying eyes and the relentless questions, the reality of what had happened slammed into you.
You just let the Winter Soldier finger you in a fucking stairwell.
And you liked it.
Plunging your fingers into your hair, you took a shaky breath. What the fuck were you thinking? Had you lost your damn mind? Bucky broke up with you three months ago! You were done; over, moving on. He could remember this, for Christ sake! How would you explain it?
Panic writhed in your stomach, but so did the faint ache of need that reminded you of what had just happened mere minutes ago.
The feeling of his metal hand on your skin, the feeling of those fingers working you perfectly and the pressure of his bruising grip.
And that feeling that you couldn’t place.
But now you had a word for it.
From the thrum of your heart as he chased you down the stairs, the promise of violence and sinful pleasure in his eyes. The roughness of his actions…
It was the thrill.
You liked the chase. You liked how rough he was. The delicious blend of panic and pleasure.
And he’d been interrupted before you got the release you’d craved. That you needed.
Frustration boiled to the forefront of your mind, a dozen different strategies with it.
He’d made you confess your darkest secret only to leave you high and dry.
And damn him if he wasn’t going to finish what he started.
2K notes · View notes
imawreck · 2 months ago
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Requests
I hope you all are doing well! I wanted to announce I’m taking some requests! I need a little break from my Bucky series and work past some writers block, so I’m open to ideas! I would love to branch out with characters, so feel free to throw in any character I’ve got listed on my master list, or even someone I don’t have listed. I’d love to explore some different characters and learn about them! That doesn’t mean I won’t take any Bucky requests, I am open to literally ANYTHING!!! I will be finishing the sequel to His on my page, and then completing requests as they come in.
Much love,
- Ayden
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imawreck · 2 months ago
Note
I see that your requests are open. Angst For Bucky Barnes please tfatws, The reader is really powerful like Jean and Wanda put together. you can do a scene when the reader has the power to see all of your past, pain and feel as well. So when she touches Bucky all the pain and trauma dump on her cause her to feel very sharp pain.
I am so unbelievably sorry I didn’t answer this sooner!!! I didn’t even see it in my inbox before I closed my requests! I’m actually about to open them back up, and I’ll be sure to give this idea my best shot! I freaking love him in tfatws 🥹. It’ll be a bit, but I’ll see what I can do!
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imawreck · 2 months ago
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Trust me, I will. 😏
His
Pairing: Winter Soldier x Reader
Summary: You and Bucky broke up a few months ago against your wishes, and you’d been trying to move on. When Bucky sees you flirting with another member of the team, he leaves for the next mission to avoid getting in your way. Unfortunately, the mission goes bad, and Bucky isn’t himself when he comes back. He also has a lot to say…
Author’s Note: I realize that in most of my fics Thor is the other romantic interest/situationship, but you CANT tell me that man wouldn’t flirt up a storm with a beautiful woman any chance he got. Also, this is my first smutty fic so feedback and comments would be much appreciated! This is on the more explicit side, so please read with caution.
Warnings: Cursing, mentions self loathing/guilt (it’s Bucky, kinda normal), choking kink, Possessive!Winter Soldier, flashbacks, hair pulling, fingering, metal arm kink, dominant!winter soldier, probably some more but those are the big ones.
Word Count: 4,850
Breakups are ugly most of the time, and almost always one sided.
You and Bucky had been apart for at least three months. You’d stopped counting, wanting to forget it and focus on anything else. It was easier that way, to ignore the heartbreak and clutter up your life with other things to do.
Unfortunately, you still lived in the same tower on the same floor, right across from one another. He was constantly around, and no mattered how hard you tried, you just couldn’t avoid him.
It was hell.
And it was only hell because Bucky hardly gave you a good reason for the break up. Sure, you had your arguments. Mostly about his past and how much better he thought you deserved, to which you’d list all the reasons he was wrong. In reality, those weren’t really arguments. It was just Bucky having a low point, which you were more than willing to help him work through. Outside of those moments, you had felt that your relationship with Bucky was near perfect.
So when he had come back from a mission and broke up with you, his only reason being ‘I can’t be with you,’ it’d been a slap to the face. Like someone had shoved a knife in your heart and twisted.
The worst part was that he wouldn’t even allow you the chance to talk to him afterwards. Every time you were in the same room together alone, he’d find every reason not to speak with you.
So, you’d taken the hint and were now trying to figure out a way to move on.
That was made a little easier when a certain God of Thunder made his interest known to you. Thor was sweet, charming, and a little goofy. Not to mention handsome, with his blonde hair and sky blue eyes.
He’d made an effort to woo you not long after you’d parted from Bucky, and you’d informed him that the breakup was hard for you and that you couldn’t really do something new right now. Thor had been surprisingly understanding, and even took to just being friends quite well. Granted, he was still flirty, but he knew where you both stood and was always happy to lend an ear when you needed one.
He turned out to be just the friend you needed.
From the outside looking in, none of the others thought it was ‘just friends,’ especially when Thor would openly show his interest in you. Especially to a certain Super Soldier.
Bucky was painfully aware of what was going on between you and Thor even though he desperately tried not to be.
His super hearing picked up on the soft laughter you and the god would share, on the hushed whispers you’d exchange late over a mug of coffee when you thought everyone was asleep. His every fiber was attuned to you, and he couldn’t help but fixate on your presence.
You were like gravity to him, and he always found himself near you when he knew he should be as far as humanly possible. He saw the little looks you shared when Thor would compliment you, noticed your shy smile when the god would enter the room. He could tell that Thor was winning you over slowly but surely.
He couldn’t fucking stand it.
So it wasn’t a big surprise when he shipped off on the next mission possible.
You worried, your heart still set on loving him, but you tried to pay it little mind. And after a few days, it actually helped. You felt better, found yourself smiling more. You were beginning to move forward.
That was, until the jet was reported missing. Then Bucky was all anyone could talk about in the tower.
Thor tried his best to keep you in the dark about most of what was going on, and it wasn’t hard seeing as you were just a rather good strategist and not a serious Avenger. You were only really included in skimming over preplanned attacks and making sure they hadn’t missed anything critical.
But word still spread, and worry was ever present.
Needless to say, it was very strange when Mr. Stark called you into a private meeting with himself and two other of the elite team.
“Y/N,” He spoke softly in the kind of tone that lets you know that whatever he says next is going to ruin your whole week. “There’s a situation with Barnes.”
You frowned, eyebrows scrunching at him from where you sat at the rather empty end of the long black table. “I’m confused. Bucky and I broke up months ago. Why are you talking to me about it?”
Steve, who you’d befriended while dating his best pal, looked at you with poorly concealed pity from his seat next to Stark. “Because we know he still means a lot to you and that you’re our best hope in this situation.”
That didn’t make you feel better about whatever was going on at all. “What do you mean ‘this situation?’” You eyed them both, before dragging your eyes over to Doctor Banner who hadn’t done much more than stare at you with a concerned expression bordering on panic.
Stark pressed his fingers to his forehead, “Barnes got triggered on his mission and has infiltrated the tower. We have reason to believe he’s after you.”
You gaped at him. That didn’t make any sense. You weren’t important, at least not as important as one of The Avengers. “Me? Why me?”
“We’ve silently shut the building down and we’re working on evacuating the floors without anyone freaking out.” Tony went on, ignoring your questions, “He doesn’t know that we’re aware he’s here, and we’re trying to keep it that way.” Tony motioned towards a monitor, and the image of Bucky popped up on the screen.
Only he was in your room, and he was dragging his fingers over the picture of the two of you that was perched on the nightstand. They way his fingers smoothed over the glass, the slight pinch in his brows as if calculating instead of recalling. It was like he’d never seen it before in his life. Like he had no connection to the image of himself.
It was a picture he had taken, his arm extended and a smile on his face with your lips pressed to his cheek. You had meant to take it down and stuff it in the box under your bed with all the other memories you had hid from sight, but it was just too painful. You needed something to hold onto.
You watched through the screen as he moved around your room, taking note of certain things and taking careful precautions to ensure that anything he moved was set right back in place. It was eerie to watch a man who was once so comfortable in your space tread with so much hesitance. Like it was the first time he’d been in the space all over again.
“Y/N.” It was Steve’s gentle timbre that brought your attention away from the screen this time. He tried to smile, though it was clearly forced. “We need you to lure him down towards the lower levels. We have to get him to a room where we can better contain him. If he finds out we know he’s back and not… him, then he could snap.”
“You want to use me as bait? For the Winter Soldier?” You stared at them both with wide eyes, panic blooming in your chest. “This is insane!”
Steve sighed, “Y/N… Bucky told me about the incident that happened in the beginning of your relationship.”
Your attention zeroed in on the blonde’s words, your breath hitching.
“He told me what could’ve happened… and what didn’t.”
You walked down the corridor of the Stark tower office floor heading back towards your desk from a late night research meeting with a few of your coworkers. You had decided to stay later than the others so that you could collect and organize the information you needed for the meeting with Mr. Stark the following morning. It was very late, and you were tired, the heels you wore had begun to irritate the soles of your feet hours before.
You clutched the files you collected in your arms, heels clicking on the glossy floors and echoing into the dimly lit corridor. So dim that you didn't see the silhouette of the man standing just feet from you until it was too late.
You only saw a flash of silver before the door beside you was torn open and you were roughly shoved inside. Cleaning supplies clattered onto the floor, spilling liquids over your feet as you cried out. A hand clamped over your mouth, and your head hit the wall with a thunk.
Stormy blue eyes stared at you, cold and unfeeling. Eyes you had seen just days before smiling at you and filled with life.
Your lips moved to say his name against the cool metal of his hand, but his grip on your face was nearly bruising. You could only stare back in fear and attempt to press your body further from him.
He didn't speak, only stared at you and kicked the door to the closet shut.
Fear was a living thing in your stomach, writhing as his eyes snaked down to your red heels and back up again. His head tilted to the side, as if he was trying to remember something. But his eyes remained cold and unrelentingly empty. His flesh hand came up to press a finger threateningly to his lips.
‘Quiet.’
You weren't stupid enough to scream, not with the way he was looking at you, with how close he was. When he removed his hand, you did exactly as he wanted. Silence hung in the small closet, suffocating you. Would he kill you? What did he want? Why hadn't he killed you already?
The cool metal of his palm slipped further down, wrapping around your throat and pressing against your thundering pulse. Your head pounded along with it, and a foggy feeling settled over your mind.
But your lungs still filled with air, and you remained aware. The pressure of his hand was ever present, but it was light enough not to cause real damage... Almost like he didn't want to hurt you.
His tongue darted out to lick his lips, the movement catching your eyes. His body leaned forward, his nose pressing into your neck and his warm breath hitting your skin. Goosebumps rose in its wake, and that lick of fear heightened again. He was acting so strangely, and the longer it went on the more unsettling it was.
When he pulled away, there was a heat in his eyes that wasn’t there before. A hunger, and… and recognition.
“Hello, Beloved.”
“We know that he didn’t hurt you, and that he displayed… certain feelings towards you.” Steve’s voice brought you out of the memory, dragging you back to the reality at hand.
The one where he wants you to put yourself smack dab in the path of the Winter Soldier.
“You’re serious about this?” You blink up at him, trying to gauge if he was joking or not. Level headed as Steve was, you trusted him with your life. But this? This was terrifying and completely unexpected. Ridiculously dangerous.
“It’s the only nonviolent way we can think of. And we’re almost certain there’s no high risk for you.” Steve tried to give you a reassuring smile, tried to hide the hint of unease that shone in his tense shoulders.
“You’ve all lost your mind.” You laugh, sighing and raising your chin. “Okay, I’ll do it.”
Apparently, so had you.
You stared at the metal doors of the elevator, your heart pounding with each toll of the floors passing. This was probably—no, was— the riskiest thing you’d ever done in your life. You trusted Steve and Mr. Stark, but your brain was trained to find the flaws in plans like this. And so many things could go wrong.
“It’s okay, Y/N.” Steve said calmly into your ear, startling you. You’d forgotten they’d given you the earpiece. “I’ll be here the entire time. I’ll guide you through the compound and make sure you stay out of danger.”
You nodded, even though you weren’t sure if they could see you.
“Bucky is leaving your room. We’re going to drop you off in the commons area of your floor. All you have to do is make some noise and then head for the stairwell. Just listen to me, and I’ll get you through this.” Steve sounded so confident in your ear, but it did little to soothe the nerves.
The elevator leveled out, and the doors quietly opened. The large living room opened up before you, unnervingly bright and welcoming despite the danger you knew lurked just down the hall. You stepped out onto the carpet, walking towards the kitchen. Your palms sweat, heart pounding, as you made your way up to the cabinets.
You just had to make some noise. Easy, right?
But your body wouldn’t move.
“Y/N.” Steve’s voice called in your ear again, gently coaxing you from where he watched the cameras. “Make some noise, and then head for the stairs.”
You swallowed, nodding again, and reached with shaky hands towards the cabinet. You grabbed a bowl, and hesitantly set it down on the granite counter. The echoing pok of the ceramic felt too loud in your ears, like a gunshot.
“Good, now move quickly. He’s just down the hall headed your way.”
The words sent a chill down your spine… and something else followed. Something you’d never felt before.
You headed towards the stairs, but your feet felt like lead weights. Like you couldn’t move fast enough even though you knew you were going as fast as you could.
But you could hear the faintest scuff of boots coming behind you and the sound sent your heart into a frenzy.
You raced down the stairs, tripping a few times before righting yourself and continuing your decent down towards the lower levels. Your floor was four levels up from ground level, which meant you had six floors in total to descend before you could get to the containment floor.
Six flights of stairs being chased by The Winter Soldier. A superhuman man who was definitely faster than you, and probably wanted to do something terrible to you. Like a wolf hunting a sheep.
Oh God.
The thought only served to spur the panic rising in you. You kicked up your speed when the door slammed behind you, footsteps pounding after you as the dark silhouette of Bucky Barnes rounded the stairs two flights above.
He took the stairs four at a time, his long legs swallowing up the distance between you. The panic clawed its way up your throat in a strangled cry, and the sound just seemed to quicken his pace.
“I’m not fast enough!” You tried to keep your voice even, tried to keep it quiet in the echoing stairwell so that the soldier behind you would hear.
“You’re almost there, Y/N. Just keep up the pace. Two flights left and—“ but he didn’t get to finish his sentence.
You watched in shocked horror as Bucky’s figure leapt over the railing and plummeted towards the ground. He dropped several flights before his arm snapped out and wrapped around the railing. The sound of metal hitting metal rang out around you as the railing dipped under the crushing pressure.
He hauled himself back onto the stairs just before you. Those cold eyes found yours, dark hair framing sharp features, painting him into something primal. Something wild.
That feeling pounded through you again, skittering along your spine and raising the hairs on the back of your neck. You still couldn’t place it, not with him stepping towards you with a look that promised violence.
You heard Steve’s voice ordering something over the earpiece, but it was distant. It became clearer a moment later. “We’ve got a team heading in. Just… just hang in there.”
You swallowed, but your throat had gone dry in the presence of the assassin before you. His eyes held you in place as his towering form finally stopped a stair below you, leveling with you face to face. So close you could count the stitches in the Kevlar of his suit.
You felt your body shaking, heard your heart thundering in your ears as your chest rose and fell with each short breath you managed to drag into your lungs.
And he watched every move you made.
His head titled to the side exactly like it’d done the first time you’d been trapped with him. His gaze never left you, eyes wandering over your face and heaving chest before that faint look of recognition settled into those hollow eyes.
And then that heat you’d seen before consumed them.
He stepped forward, and you answered with a step back. For each one he took, you pedaled backwards until your body was plastered against the wall. When you tried to flee back up the stairs, his metal hand planted itself against the wall inches from your head.
You were utterly trapped.
Rough Russian left his lips in the softest whisper. The sound was the same as you’d heart him say before, though you didn’t understand it.
Not until now, as the earpiece Steve had given you translated his words as he spoke them.
“Hello again, Beloved.”
Those blue eyes bored into yours, as his other hand came up to brush your cheek with a gentleness you didn’t think he was capable of.
“He’s kept me from you for so long.” Bucky’s body leaned forward, caging you against the wall. His metal hand remained pressed against the wall beside you, and the other dragged across the skin of your neck and shoulder in an almost reverent manner.
Bucky’s— no, this wasn’t Bucky. This was the part of Bucky he kept farthest from you. This was a man known for cruel, unimaginable violence. An assassin known by reputation around the world by both hero and criminal alike and feared by all. This was the Winter Soldier.
Winters lips brushed your jaw, stubble tickling the column of your throat as his voice rumbled against your skin. “Kept you to himself. Never let me touch you. Worried I’d damage you, Beloved. Couldn’t see you needed me.”
His teeth nipped at your skin, and a shiver rolled down your spine in answer. That feeling tugged at your mind again, spurred by his words. But still, you couldn’t place it. Not with your mind consumed by his statements and barely contained yearning.
When his head lifted to find your eyes again, the fingers of his right hand tangled themselves in your hair and pulled hard enough to have your scalp stinging. His next words were guttural and biting, “And then he let you go.”
Winters grip loosened a bit, but his hold on your hair remained. “He pushed you away, and then that god tries to take you from me?” His eyes held you, demanding your utter attention as his head shook slowly, “You don’t belong to him.”
Tugging your lip between your teeth, you clenched your eyes shut. God, you wished Bucky would say that to you. Having Winter here saying these words with Bucky’s voice, Bucky’s face. Touching you with familiar hands…
Heat had begun to pool low in your belly.
The words were spoken in English. “Open your eyes.”
There was no room for objection in his voice, so you did as he said. With his jaw was set in an angry line, and those blue eyes boring into your soul, he leaned in closer. “He thinks that being with you is too dangerous, that you aren’t safe with… with us.”
“What?” Your heart hammered in your chest at his words. It was the first real reason as to why Bucky had broken up with you.
Those silvery blue eyes zeroed on your lips as he spoke again. “He thinks we can’t protect you, that I’ll hurt you. That somehow being further from you keeps you safe from what comes with being what we are.” His metal hand left the wall in favor of brushing over your lower lip and trailing the cool tips of his fingers down to the dip of your breasts and back up to the column of your throat. “I’d never hurt you, not the way he has. Not if you didn’t want it.”
“W-what do you mean?” You just knew he was picking up on how your heart beat harder as his fingers trailed over your skin. Or the way you kept shifting on your feet to stave off the heat thrumming in your veins with an all too familiar want blooming and begging for his hands to explore more.
The faintest hint of a smile graced his face as he gave your hair another gentle tug, then loosened his grip once more. “You like this. I’ve seen how you react with him. How you quietly treasure the marks he leaves on your skin even when he feels nothing but guilt.” That metal hand slipped over your throat again and pressed on your neck exactly as he’d done the first time you’d seen Winter. Your head spun at the pressure, but you could breathe easily under the cool press of his palm as he leaned in, lips brushing your ear as he whispered. “I see how badly you wish he’d touch you with this hand,” he squeezed your neck and loosened it quickly, “How badly you want those marks. How badly you need me.”
You had no words. Nothing to say as he wrung out the truth you’d thought was hidden from him— from Bucky.
Bucky was notorious for avoiding any situation that would make him use the metal arm. He would much rather let it hang there, or act as if he didn’t have it at all. That included when the two of you would get intimate. He never dared to bring it anywhere near you no matter how many times you’d reminded him it was fine, that you weren’t afraid of it. He outright refused to allow it to touch your delicate skin, to let such a catalyst for agony so close to something as precious as you.
Winter knew that you’d secretly craved to feel the cold metal in contrast to his warm skin when he held you. He knew that you would always find it more satisfying when Bucky would lose himself and get rough with you when things got heated. How his flesh hand would leave bruises on your thighs or hips to keep you steady as he thrust himself deeper.
Just the thought had you aching, and here was Bucky’s darker half offering you everything you’d ever wanted.
You were losing your fucking mind.
“You’re wrong,” you whispered, but the words were flimsy and meaningless. He knew the truth, but that didn’t mean you had to say it aloud.
His metal fingers dug into your jaw, his grip near bruising as he tilted your head up to level your eyes with his. “Don’t fucking lie to me, Dollface.” His lips were a hairs-width away, his warm breath fanning over your face.
The scent of him was intoxicating, muddling your mind even further with heady leather and metal invading your nose. The hint of that aftershave you’d missed so much since Bucky broke your heart.
Winter was tearing you apart at the seams.
“Please,” you whispered. Please what? You didn’t know. You could hardly think straight. That feeling was so strong, thrumming along with your pulse and the ache for something. Anything.
“Tell me I’m right.” He mumbled against your skin. Soft lips, a vast contrast to his rough demeanor, to the calloused hand that remained tangled in your hair, trailed down your cheek. “Tell me that you want me. Not the pathetic excuse for a god, or him. That you want me.”
His metal hand released your face, drifting over your neck and dragging over the left side of your chest. He circled once, thumbing over your nipple with a knowing look filled with every sinful promise known to man.
And then he went lower and lower…
His fingers caught the waistband of your leggings, the chill of his fingers raised goosebumps across your stomach, only serving to worsen that burning need.
“Doll,” a command and a question wrapped in one word.
All you had to do was admit your darkest most guarded secret. Confess, and he would give you what you wanted most. What Bucky was too afraid to do.
You opened your mouth, the words tumbling out as he gave your hair another tug.
“I want you.”
That smirk grew just a fraction more, his fingers slipping past your waistband and toying with the hem of your panties.
Fuck, did you wish you’d gone commando today.
“Who am I?” He asked, teeth nipping down your neck hard enough to know they’d leave marks. “I want you to say it, Y/N.”
Those fingers slipped further, rolling over your aching clit in a teasing stroke before he pulled them away again.
If he wasn’t a literal assassin, you’d consider strangling him.
“For fucks sake,” you gripped his arm, your voice unfamiliar in your own ears, ragged and broken. “Winter, please.”
He didn’t waste time, deft, cool fingers dipping into your core with confidence. Soothing that aching heat.
Fuck.
His thumb circled slow as he pumped his fingers, his mouth leaving wet kisses along your jaw up to your lips where he paused long enough to catch a glimpse of your face. You knew you looked like an utter mess, but those blue eyes showed nothing but twisted delight. He leaned forward and tugged your bottom lip between his teeth, bitting hard enough to make you groan.
Winter’s answering grunt of approval urged you further towards the edge of oblivion those perfect metal fingers were working you towards.
God you were so close. Each movement, every touch and bruise he left on your skin pushing you closer and closer. Just a bit more, a fraction more and you’d—
His fingers wrenched away, gone in an instant.
Your eyes, closed from the pleasure just moments ago, snapped open just before the doors to the stairway above and below you burst open. Floods of agents filed through the doors, and a gun fired.
The sharp sound echoed in the confined space making you flinch. Winters back pressed you against the wall, a solid shield of muscle keeping you out of harms way.
Then the weight was too heavy. His body crushing you as he slumped toward the floor. You screamed, immediately thinking the worse as your eyes searched his form in a panic.
But you found no blood, thank God.
“He’s fine, Y/N.”
Steve’s hand on your shoulder had you flinching back, head snapping to his suit clad form. “The gun—“
“It’s just a tranq. I promise, Bucky will be fine.” His face was the picture of practiced reassurance.
A horde of agents rushed forward and cuffed Winters hands and dragged his unconscious body out of the stairwell and further towards the confinement room. Steve remained with you, his eyes flicking to your neck a few times and checking you over to make sure no serious damage had been done.
When you’d gotten yourself back to your room away from the prying eyes and the relentless questions, the reality of what had happened slammed into you.
You just let the Winter Soldier finger you in a fucking stairwell.
And you liked it.
Plunging your fingers into your hair, you took a shaky breath. What the fuck were you thinking? Had you lost your damn mind? Bucky broke up with you three months ago! You were done; over, moving on. He could remember this, for Christ sake! How would you explain it?
Panic writhed in your stomach, but so did the faint ache of need that reminded you of what had just happened mere minutes ago.
The feeling of his metal hand on your skin, the feeling of those fingers working you perfectly and the pressure of his bruising grip.
And that feeling that you couldn’t place.
But now you had a word for it.
From the thrum of your heart as he chased you down the stairs, the promise of violence and sinful pleasure in his eyes. The roughness of his actions…
It was the thrill.
You liked the chase. You liked how rough he was. The delicious blend of panic and pleasure.
And he’d been interrupted before you got the release you’d craved. That you needed.
Frustration boiled to the forefront of your mind, a dozen different strategies with it.
He’d made you confess your darkest secret only to leave you high and dry.
And damn him if he wasn’t going to finish what he started.
2K notes · View notes
imawreck · 2 months ago
Text
His
Pairing: Winter Soldier x Reader
Summary: You and Bucky broke up a few months ago against your wishes, and you’d been trying to move on. When Bucky sees you flirting with another member of the team, he leaves for the next mission to avoid getting in your way. Unfortunately, the mission goes bad, and Bucky isn’t himself when he comes back. He also has a lot to say…
Author’s Note: I realize that in most of my fics Thor is the other romantic interest/situationship, but you CANT tell me that man wouldn’t flirt up a storm with a beautiful woman any chance he got. Also, this is my first smutty fic so feedback and comments would be much appreciated! This is on the more explicit side, so please read with caution.
Warnings: Cursing, mentions self loathing/guilt (it’s Bucky, kinda normal), choking kink, Possessive!Winter Soldier, flashbacks, hair pulling, fingering, metal arm kink, dominant!winter soldier, probably some more but those are the big ones.
Word Count: 4,850
Breakups are ugly most of the time, and almost always one sided.
You and Bucky had been apart for at least three months. You’d stopped counting, wanting to forget it and focus on anything else. It was easier that way, to ignore the heartbreak and clutter up your life with other things to do.
Unfortunately, you still lived in the same tower on the same floor, right across from one another. He was constantly around, and no mattered how hard you tried, you just couldn’t avoid him.
It was hell.
And it was only hell because Bucky hardly gave you a good reason for the break up. Sure, you had your arguments. Mostly about his past and how much better he thought you deserved, to which you’d list all the reasons he was wrong. In reality, those weren’t really arguments. It was just Bucky having a low point, which you were more than willing to help him work through. Outside of those moments, you had felt that your relationship with Bucky was near perfect.
So when he had come back from a mission and broke up with you, his only reason being ‘I can’t be with you,’ it’d been a slap to the face. Like someone had shoved a knife in your heart and twisted.
The worst part was that he wouldn’t even allow you the chance to talk to him afterwards. Every time you were in the same room together alone, he’d find every reason not to speak with you.
So, you’d taken the hint and were now trying to figure out a way to move on.
That was made a little easier when a certain God of Thunder made his interest known to you. Thor was sweet, charming, and a little goofy. Not to mention handsome, with his blonde hair and sky blue eyes.
He’d made an effort to woo you not long after you’d parted from Bucky, and you’d informed him that the breakup was hard for you and that you couldn’t really do something new right now. Thor had been surprisingly understanding, and even took to just being friends quite well. Granted, he was still flirty, but he knew where you both stood and was always happy to lend an ear when you needed one.
He turned out to be just the friend you needed.
From the outside looking in, none of the others thought it was ‘just friends,’ especially when Thor would openly show his interest in you. Especially to a certain Super Soldier.
Bucky was painfully aware of what was going on between you and Thor even though he desperately tried not to be.
His super hearing picked up on the soft laughter you and the god would share, on the hushed whispers you’d exchange late over a mug of coffee when you thought everyone was asleep. His every fiber was attuned to you, and he couldn’t help but fixate on your presence.
You were like gravity to him, and he always found himself near you when he knew he should be as far as humanly possible. He saw the little looks you shared when Thor would compliment you, noticed your shy smile when the god would enter the room. He could tell that Thor was winning you over slowly but surely.
He couldn’t fucking stand it.
So it wasn’t a big surprise when he shipped off on the next mission possible.
You worried, your heart still set on loving him, but you tried to pay it little mind. And after a few days, it actually helped. You felt better, found yourself smiling more. You were beginning to move forward.
That was, until the jet was reported missing. Then Bucky was all anyone could talk about in the tower.
Thor tried his best to keep you in the dark about most of what was going on, and it wasn’t hard seeing as you were just a rather good strategist and not a serious Avenger. You were only really included in skimming over preplanned attacks and making sure they hadn’t missed anything critical.
But word still spread, and worry was ever present.
Needless to say, it was very strange when Mr. Stark called you into a private meeting with himself and two other of the elite team.
“Y/N,” He spoke softly in the kind of tone that lets you know that whatever he says next is going to ruin your whole week. “There’s a situation with Barnes.”
You frowned, eyebrows scrunching at him from where you sat at the rather empty end of the long black table. “I’m confused. Bucky and I broke up months ago. Why are you talking to me about it?”
Steve, who you’d befriended while dating his best pal, looked at you with poorly concealed pity from his seat next to Stark. “Because we know he still means a lot to you and that you’re our best hope in this situation.”
That didn’t make you feel better about whatever was going on at all. “What do you mean ‘this situation?’” You eyed them both, before dragging your eyes over to Doctor Banner who hadn’t done much more than stare at you with a concerned expression bordering on panic.
Stark pressed his fingers to his forehead, “Barnes got triggered on his mission and has infiltrated the tower. We have reason to believe he’s after you.”
You gaped at him. That didn’t make any sense. You weren’t important, at least not as important as one of The Avengers. “Me? Why me?”
“We’ve silently shut the building down and we’re working on evacuating the floors without anyone freaking out.” Tony went on, ignoring your questions, “He doesn’t know that we’re aware he’s here, and we’re trying to keep it that way.” Tony motioned towards a monitor, and the image of Bucky popped up on the screen.
Only he was in your room, and he was dragging his fingers over the picture of the two of you that was perched on the nightstand. They way his fingers smoothed over the glass, the slight pinch in his brows as if calculating instead of recalling. It was like he’d never seen it before in his life. Like he had no connection to the image of himself.
It was a picture he had taken, his arm extended and a smile on his face with your lips pressed to his cheek. You had meant to take it down and stuff it in the box under your bed with all the other memories you had hid from sight, but it was just too painful. You needed something to hold onto.
You watched through the screen as he moved around your room, taking note of certain things and taking careful precautions to ensure that anything he moved was set right back in place. It was eerie to watch a man who was once so comfortable in your space tread with so much hesitance. Like it was the first time he’d been in the space all over again.
“Y/N.” It was Steve’s gentle timbre that brought your attention away from the screen this time. He tried to smile, though it was clearly forced. “We need you to lure him down towards the lower levels. We have to get him to a room where we can better contain him. If he finds out we know he’s back and not… him, then he could snap.”
“You want to use me as bait? For the Winter Soldier?” You stared at them both with wide eyes, panic blooming in your chest. “This is insane!”
Steve sighed, “Y/N… Bucky told me about the incident that happened in the beginning of your relationship.”
Your attention zeroed in on the blonde’s words, your breath hitching.
“He told me what could’ve happened… and what didn’t.”
You walked down the corridor of the Stark tower office floor heading back towards your desk from a late night research meeting with a few of your coworkers. You had decided to stay later than the others so that you could collect and organize the information you needed for the meeting with Mr. Stark the following morning. It was very late, and you were tired, the heels you wore had begun to irritate the soles of your feet hours before.
You clutched the files you collected in your arms, heels clicking on the glossy floors and echoing into the dimly lit corridor. So dim that you didn't see the silhouette of the man standing just feet from you until it was too late.
You only saw a flash of silver before the door beside you was torn open and you were roughly shoved inside. Cleaning supplies clattered onto the floor, spilling liquids over your feet as you cried out. A hand clamped over your mouth, and your head hit the wall with a thunk.
Stormy blue eyes stared at you, cold and unfeeling. Eyes you had seen just days before smiling at you and filled with life.
Your lips moved to say his name against the cool metal of his hand, but his grip on your face was nearly bruising. You could only stare back in fear and attempt to press your body further from him.
He didn't speak, only stared at you and kicked the door to the closet shut.
Fear was a living thing in your stomach, writhing as his eyes snaked down to your red heels and back up again. His head tilted to the side, as if he was trying to remember something. But his eyes remained cold and unrelentingly empty. His flesh hand came up to press a finger threateningly to his lips.
‘Quiet.’
You weren't stupid enough to scream, not with the way he was looking at you, with how close he was. When he removed his hand, you did exactly as he wanted. Silence hung in the small closet, suffocating you. Would he kill you? What did he want? Why hadn't he killed you already?
The cool metal of his palm slipped further down, wrapping around your throat and pressing against your thundering pulse. Your head pounded along with it, and a foggy feeling settled over your mind.
But your lungs still filled with air, and you remained aware. The pressure of his hand was ever present, but it was light enough not to cause real damage... Almost like he didn't want to hurt you.
His tongue darted out to lick his lips, the movement catching your eyes. His body leaned forward, his nose pressing into your neck and his warm breath hitting your skin. Goosebumps rose in its wake, and that lick of fear heightened again. He was acting so strangely, and the longer it went on the more unsettling it was.
When he pulled away, there was a heat in his eyes that wasn’t there before. A hunger, and… and recognition.
“Hello, Beloved.”
“We know that he didn’t hurt you, and that he displayed… certain feelings towards you.” Steve’s voice brought you out of the memory, dragging you back to the reality at hand.
The one where he wants you to put yourself smack dab in the path of the Winter Soldier.
“You’re serious about this?” You blink up at him, trying to gauge if he was joking or not. Level headed as Steve was, you trusted him with your life. But this? This was terrifying and completely unexpected. Ridiculously dangerous.
“It’s the only nonviolent way we can think of. And we’re almost certain there’s no high risk for you.” Steve tried to give you a reassuring smile, tried to hide the hint of unease that shone in his tense shoulders.
“You’ve all lost your mind.” You laugh, sighing and raising your chin. “Okay, I’ll do it.”
Apparently, so had you.
You stared at the metal doors of the elevator, your heart pounding with each toll of the floors passing. This was probably—no, was— the riskiest thing you’d ever done in your life. You trusted Steve and Mr. Stark, but your brain was trained to find the flaws in plans like this. And so many things could go wrong.
“It’s okay, Y/N.” Steve said calmly into your ear, startling you. You’d forgotten they’d given you the earpiece. “I’ll be here the entire time. I’ll guide you through the compound and make sure you stay out of danger.”
You nodded, even though you weren’t sure if they could see you.
“Bucky is leaving your room. We’re going to drop you off in the commons area of your floor. All you have to do is make some noise and then head for the stairwell. Just listen to me, and I’ll get you through this.” Steve sounded so confident in your ear, but it did little to soothe the nerves.
The elevator leveled out, and the doors quietly opened. The large living room opened up before you, unnervingly bright and welcoming despite the danger you knew lurked just down the hall. You stepped out onto the carpet, walking towards the kitchen. Your palms sweat, heart pounding, as you made your way up to the cabinets.
You just had to make some noise. Easy, right?
But your body wouldn’t move.
“Y/N.” Steve’s voice called in your ear again, gently coaxing you from where he watched the cameras. “Make some noise, and then head for the stairs.”
You swallowed, nodding again, and reached with shaky hands towards the cabinet. You grabbed a bowl, and hesitantly set it down on the granite counter. The echoing pok of the ceramic felt too loud in your ears, like a gunshot.
“Good, now move quickly. He’s just down the hall headed your way.”
The words sent a chill down your spine… and something else followed. Something you’d never felt before.
You headed towards the stairs, but your feet felt like lead weights. Like you couldn’t move fast enough even though you knew you were going as fast as you could.
But you could hear the faintest scuff of boots coming behind you and the sound sent your heart into a frenzy.
You raced down the stairs, tripping a few times before righting yourself and continuing your decent down towards the lower levels. Your floor was four levels up from ground level, which meant you had six floors in total to descend before you could get to the containment floor.
Six flights of stairs being chased by The Winter Soldier. A superhuman man who was definitely faster than you, and probably wanted to do something terrible to you. Like a wolf hunting a sheep.
Oh God.
The thought only served to spur the panic rising in you. You kicked up your speed when the door slammed behind you, footsteps pounding after you as the dark silhouette of Bucky Barnes rounded the stairs two flights above.
He took the stairs four at a time, his long legs swallowing up the distance between you. The panic clawed its way up your throat in a strangled cry, and the sound just seemed to quicken his pace.
“I’m not fast enough!” You tried to keep your voice even, tried to keep it quiet in the echoing stairwell so that the soldier behind you would hear.
“You’re almost there, Y/N. Just keep up the pace. Two flights left and—“ but he didn’t get to finish his sentence.
You watched in shocked horror as Bucky’s figure leapt over the railing and plummeted towards the ground. He dropped several flights before his arm snapped out and wrapped around the railing. The sound of metal hitting metal rang out around you as the railing dipped under the crushing pressure.
He hauled himself back onto the stairs just before you. Those cold eyes found yours, dark hair framing sharp features, painting him into something primal. Something wild.
That feeling pounded through you again, skittering along your spine and raising the hairs on the back of your neck. You still couldn’t place it, not with him stepping towards you with a look that promised violence.
You heard Steve’s voice ordering something over the earpiece, but it was distant. It became clearer a moment later. “We’ve got a team heading in. Just… just hang in there.”
You swallowed, but your throat had gone dry in the presence of the assassin before you. His eyes held you in place as his towering form finally stopped a stair below you, leveling with you face to face. So close you could count the stitches in the Kevlar of his suit.
You felt your body shaking, heard your heart thundering in your ears as your chest rose and fell with each short breath you managed to drag into your lungs.
And he watched every move you made.
His head titled to the side exactly like it’d done the first time you’d been trapped with him. His gaze never left you, eyes wandering over your face and heaving chest before that faint look of recognition settled into those hollow eyes.
And then that heat you’d seen before consumed them.
He stepped forward, and you answered with a step back. For each one he took, you pedaled backwards until your body was plastered against the wall. When you tried to flee back up the stairs, his metal hand planted itself against the wall inches from your head.
You were utterly trapped.
Rough Russian left his lips in the softest whisper. The sound was the same as you’d heart him say before, though you didn’t understand it.
Not until now, as the earpiece Steve had given you translated his words as he spoke them.
“Hello again, Beloved.”
Those blue eyes bored into yours, as his other hand came up to brush your cheek with a gentleness you didn’t think he was capable of.
“He’s kept me from you for so long.” Bucky’s body leaned forward, caging you against the wall. His metal hand remained pressed against the wall beside you, and the other dragged across the skin of your neck and shoulder in an almost reverent manner.
Bucky’s— no, this wasn’t Bucky. This was the part of Bucky he kept farthest from you. This was a man known for cruel, unimaginable violence. An assassin known by reputation around the world by both hero and criminal alike and feared by all. This was the Winter Soldier.
Winters lips brushed your jaw, stubble tickling the column of your throat as his voice rumbled against your skin. “Kept you to himself. Never let me touch you. Worried I’d damage you, Beloved. Couldn’t see you needed me.”
His teeth nipped at your skin, and a shiver rolled down your spine in answer. That feeling tugged at your mind again, spurred by his words. But still, you couldn’t place it. Not with your mind consumed by his statements and barely contained yearning.
When his head lifted to find your eyes again, the fingers of his right hand tangled themselves in your hair and pulled hard enough to have your scalp stinging. His next words were guttural and biting, “And then he let you go.”
Winters grip loosened a bit, but his hold on your hair remained. “He pushed you away, and then that god tries to take you from me?” His eyes held you, demanding your utter attention as his head shook slowly, “You don’t belong to him.”
Tugging your lip between your teeth, you clenched your eyes shut. God, you wished Bucky would say that to you. Having Winter here saying these words with Bucky’s voice, Bucky’s face. Touching you with familiar hands…
Heat had begun to pool low in your belly.
The words were spoken in English. “Open your eyes.”
There was no room for objection in his voice, so you did as he said. With his jaw was set in an angry line, and those blue eyes boring into your soul, he leaned in closer. “He thinks that being with you is too dangerous, that you aren’t safe with… with us.”
“What?” Your heart hammered in your chest at his words. It was the first real reason as to why Bucky had broken up with you.
Those silvery blue eyes zeroed on your lips as he spoke again. “He thinks we can’t protect you, that I’ll hurt you. That somehow being further from you keeps you safe from what comes with being what we are.” His metal hand left the wall in favor of brushing over your lower lip and trailing the cool tips of his fingers down to the dip of your breasts and back up to the column of your throat. “I’d never hurt you, not the way he has. Not if you didn’t want it.”
“W-what do you mean?” You just knew he was picking up on how your heart beat harder as his fingers trailed over your skin. Or the way you kept shifting on your feet to stave off the heat thrumming in your veins with an all too familiar want blooming and begging for his hands to explore more.
The faintest hint of a smile graced his face as he gave your hair another gentle tug, then loosened his grip once more. “You like this. I’ve seen how you react with him. How you quietly treasure the marks he leaves on your skin even when he feels nothing but guilt.” That metal hand slipped over your throat again and pressed on your neck exactly as he’d done the first time you’d seen Winter. Your head spun at the pressure, but you could breathe easily under the cool press of his palm as he leaned in, lips brushing your ear as he whispered. “I see how badly you wish he’d touch you with this hand,” he squeezed your neck and loosened it quickly, “How badly you want those marks. How badly you need me.”
You had no words. Nothing to say as he wrung out the truth you’d thought was hidden from him— from Bucky.
Bucky was notorious for avoiding any situation that would make him use the metal arm. He would much rather let it hang there, or act as if he didn’t have it at all. That included when the two of you would get intimate. He never dared to bring it anywhere near you no matter how many times you’d reminded him it was fine, that you weren’t afraid of it. He outright refused to allow it to touch your delicate skin, to let such a catalyst for agony so close to something as precious as you.
Winter knew that you’d secretly craved to feel the cold metal in contrast to his warm skin when he held you. He knew that you would always find it more satisfying when Bucky would lose himself and get rough with you when things got heated. How his flesh hand would leave bruises on your thighs or hips to keep you steady as he thrust himself deeper.
Just the thought had you aching, and here was Bucky’s darker half offering you everything you’d ever wanted.
You were losing your fucking mind.
“You’re wrong,” you whispered, but the words were flimsy and meaningless. He knew the truth, but that didn’t mean you had to say it aloud.
His metal fingers dug into your jaw, his grip near bruising as he tilted your head up to level your eyes with his. “Don’t fucking lie to me, Dollface.” His lips were a hairs-width away, his warm breath fanning over your face.
The scent of him was intoxicating, muddling your mind even further with heady leather and metal invading your nose. The hint of that aftershave you’d missed so much since Bucky broke your heart.
Winter was tearing you apart at the seams.
“Please,” you whispered. Please what? You didn’t know. You could hardly think straight. That feeling was so strong, thrumming along with your pulse and the ache for something. Anything.
“Tell me I’m right.” He mumbled against your skin. Soft lips, a vast contrast to his rough demeanor, to the calloused hand that remained tangled in your hair, trailed down your cheek. “Tell me that you want me. Not the pathetic excuse for a god, or him. That you want me.”
His metal hand released your face, drifting over your neck and dragging over the left side of your chest. He circled once, thumbing over your nipple with a knowing look filled with every sinful promise known to man.
And then he went lower and lower…
His fingers caught the waistband of your leggings, the chill of his fingers raised goosebumps across your stomach, only serving to worsen that burning need.
“Doll,” a command and a question wrapped in one word.
All you had to do was admit your darkest most guarded secret. Confess, and he would give you what you wanted most. What Bucky was too afraid to do.
You opened your mouth, the words tumbling out as he gave your hair another tug.
“I want you.”
That smirk grew just a fraction more, his fingers slipping past your waistband and toying with the hem of your panties.
Fuck, did you wish you’d gone commando today.
“Who am I?” He asked, teeth nipping down your neck hard enough to know they’d leave marks. “I want you to say it, Y/N.”
Those fingers slipped further, rolling over your aching clit in a teasing stroke before he pulled them away again.
If he wasn’t a literal assassin, you’d consider strangling him.
“For fucks sake,” you gripped his arm, your voice unfamiliar in your own ears, ragged and broken. “Winter, please.”
He didn’t waste time, deft, cool fingers dipping into your core with confidence. Soothing that aching heat.
Fuck.
His thumb circled slow as he pumped his fingers, his mouth leaving wet kisses along your jaw up to your lips where he paused long enough to catch a glimpse of your face. You knew you looked like an utter mess, but those blue eyes showed nothing but twisted delight. He leaned forward and tugged your bottom lip between his teeth, bitting hard enough to make you groan.
Winter’s answering grunt of approval urged you further towards the edge of oblivion those perfect metal fingers were working you towards.
God you were so close. Each movement, every touch and bruise he left on your skin pushing you closer and closer. Just a bit more, a fraction more and you’d—
His fingers wrenched away, gone in an instant.
Your eyes, closed from the pleasure just moments ago, snapped open just before the doors to the stairway above and below you burst open. Floods of agents filed through the doors, and a gun fired.
The sharp sound echoed in the confined space making you flinch. Winters back pressed you against the wall, a solid shield of muscle keeping you out of harms way.
Then the weight was too heavy. His body crushing you as he slumped toward the floor. You screamed, immediately thinking the worse as your eyes searched his form in a panic.
But you found no blood, thank God.
“He’s fine, Y/N.”
Steve’s hand on your shoulder had you flinching back, head snapping to his suit clad form. “The gun—“
“It’s just a tranq. I promise, Bucky will be fine.” His face was the picture of practiced reassurance.
A horde of agents rushed forward and cuffed Winters hands and dragged his unconscious body out of the stairwell and further towards the confinement room. Steve remained with you, his eyes flicking to your neck a few times and checking you over to make sure no serious damage had been done.
When you’d gotten yourself back to your room away from the prying eyes and the relentless questions, the reality of what had happened slammed into you.
You just let the Winter Soldier finger you in a fucking stairwell.
And you liked it.
Plunging your fingers into your hair, you took a shaky breath. What the fuck were you thinking? Had you lost your damn mind? Bucky broke up with you three months ago! You were done; over, moving on. He could remember this, for Christ sake! How would you explain it?
Panic writhed in your stomach, but so did the faint ache of need that reminded you of what had just happened mere minutes ago.
The feeling of his metal hand on your skin, the feeling of those fingers working you perfectly and the pressure of his bruising grip.
And that feeling that you couldn’t place.
But now you had a word for it.
From the thrum of your heart as he chased you down the stairs, the promise of violence and sinful pleasure in his eyes. The roughness of his actions…
It was the thrill.
You liked the chase. You liked how rough he was. The delicious blend of panic and pleasure.
And he’d been interrupted before you got the release you’d craved. That you needed.
Frustration boiled to the forefront of your mind, a dozen different strategies with it.
He’d made you confess your darkest secret only to leave you high and dry.
And damn him if he wasn’t going to finish what he started.
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imawreck · 2 months ago
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GIRLIE. THE ENDING WAS HEARTBREAKING. LIKE. I GUESS IMMA HAVE TO FINISH THE STORY IN MY IMAGINATION. 😭 bucky did all that for her TO LEAVE. not in my mind 💀
HOMEGIRL JUST WAIT I PROMISE IT ISNT THE END!!! 🤣🤣🤣 It builds up the angst, and there’s a whirlwind of things coming! I have plans to write her storyline into the next couple of movies/shows in the MCU timeline. So Max and Bucky aren’t done just yet!
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