#sprite. SPRITE. YOU HAVE KILLED ME

[beneathsilverstars]

the dissociaterrrr

(They're good enough at Tetris that a couple dollars in quarters will last them a decent amount of time, but sometimes they splurge and get the $12 all-you-can-play pass. The album they're listening to is harsh noise!)

[diseaseriddencube]

how cute, they thought they could stop me from screenshotting the gallery sections >:) too bad, he's gonna be my wallpaper now, impregnating him too

[kheprriverse]

The Final Battle.

Masterpost || Next

[softquietsteadylove]

I have an idea for the lawyer au. Inspiration from Boston legal season 8 episode 9.

A girl, make her young like sprite, comes to Gil one day and asks if he is a lawyer and if he can help her. Gil thinking she is being a kid jokingly asks how much money she has and when she answers 10 bucks her father comes and wants to take her with her. But she holds onto Gil and says please help me, if I go back to Poland they’ll force me to marry a man in this country. in this moment he realizes it’s a serious matter and protects the girl. At the end of this case it’s a very depressing situation for him. Thena is there to gently lift him up

Im sure you’ll manage to do something with it

"Gil."

Gil didn't even pick his head up. He was all but sleeping in his mug of guinness. "Gil's not here."

Thena didn't let him get away with it. She did pat his shoulder with some sense of pity for him. "Come on, Gil. It's well past midnight and you have another court date tomorrow."

He groaned at even the mention of going into court again. He didn't know if he had it in him after his day today. "I'm not going back there."

Thena shuffled her purse on her shoulder and perched herself on the stool next to his. "You don't mean that."

"I do," he huffed, pushing the goblet away with distaste. All he could smell was the thick, sweet stench of it. "And I should have punched that judge in the face."

"It wouldn't have changed the ruling," she pointed out in a very Thena way. "Unless you want to be barred from practising law for a year, if not the rest of your life."

He shrugged. He wasn't sure how he felt about the law after today. He had always thought he was on the side of the good guys, as cliche as it sounded. Sure, the law was far from perfect, but he really thought he was doing some good with his job.

"You did everything you could for that girl, Gil."

He scoffed and rubbed his eyes. The dim lighting and loud music of the bar were making his vision blurry, and all he could taste in the back of his throat was cheap beer. "Is that what you call letting her get shipped back to Poland to get married to some old creep?"

She was a kid, no older than Sprite. It was a sickening 'case', no matter how sudden or pro bono it had been. She had even offered to pay with the only 10 dollars to her name, kept safe inside the birthday card it came in and everything. But none of it had done any good.

"We don't win every case, Gil."

"Well, you'd think this one would matter more!"

A few heads turned. He had been quietly sulking at the bar for hours, by this point, enough beers in that the bartender was beginning to eye him every time he asked for another.

Thena didn't even flinch.

Gil groaned again, scrubbing his face with his hands even though he'd been touching the bar that was cleaned only god knew when. He sighed, "I'm sorry."

But she understood his outburst, maybe even condoned it. "It's okay. I can't say I blame you for coming here and burying it under...how many is it now?"

More than he wanted to admit to. So, instead, he ruffled his hair and attempted to pull himself up in his seat with some dignity. "Doesn't matter. I'm pretty sure he's cut me off quietly anyway."

The bartender turned around, ears already burning and a towel slung over his shoulder. "Time to pay up, Boston Legal?"

"Very funny," Gil snarled at him. He knew it wasn't this guy's fault he'd had the worst day of his entire career, but that didn't mean he was in any mood for it. He slapped his hands over his jacket, his rumpled tie and then his suit pockets. "Shit."

"Oh come on, man, you're a lawyer, I know you've got-"

"It's okay, I'll pay it," Thena held her hand up, already reaching into her purse.

"Fuck," Gil cursed, hanging his head (as if he needed any more reason to be ashamed of himself tonight). He misjudged the distance, even knocking his forehead against the counter edge. Maybe it would be a little sobering, if he was lucky. "Thena, you don't have to-"

"It's okay," she assured him yet again, but she was still sounding more like 'work' Thena than the Thena had come to know and prefer.

Gil watched as the bartender took her card to close out his tab. He couldn't get any more pathetic anyway--what was a little more humiliation? "What are you doing here? Are the girls okay?"

Thena finally smiled at him, and it was the real Thena he saw, no matter how blurry. "They both asked to have sleepovers tonight. It's rare, but tomorrow is a half day at school, so I dropped them both off. When I asked how you were, the response wasn't all that clear, so I figured I would try here."

Gil made a face. He didn't remember talking with her. He felt around again for his phone, which he didn't so much pull out as clumsily drop it onto the bar. He blinked a few times, really trying to focus on reading his messages.

She had texted him, asking if he was doing okay and where he was. His response was a jumbled mess, but he unfortunately could make out something resembling him telling her that he was going to drown himself in beer and that she could join if she wanted.

He couldn't even remember reading, let alone responding to it. He really did need to be cut off for the night. He wasn't young and in college anymore--he would probably have a hell of a hangover tomorrow morning (afternoon).

Thena nodded as her card was handed back to her, Gil's debt settled. She turned back to him, "think you can walk?"

He grumbled. If he wasn't already, he would flush with guilt at the insinuation. "I'm not that bad, Thena, really."

She was kind to say nothing about him wobbling a little as he got up at first. But he made it to the door easily enough with her behind him. Maybe he did need a little hand on his back, but as soon as he was out in the cold night air it was at least a little better.

Thena pulled her jacket tighter around herself. She should have been at home, relaxing during her kid-free-evening. She could have been curled up reading or watching that funny ghost show she liked with a glass of wine or a mug of tea or something. Instead, she was picking up his drunk ass from a dive bar a block away from work.

"I'm sorry, Thena," he began apologizing, for the first time of many, he told himself. He owed her plenty more, and that was beyond his bar tab, which he would pay back with interest, too. "I just...that kid-"

He pushed his nose deeper into the soft material of her white turtleneck. The cotton or cashmere or whatever it was soaked up his tears. "She was just a kid."

Thena probably didn't consider herself a hugger, but she gave really nice ones. She was really gentle, and soft, and even if she was small boned, she still felt warm. Even in her boots, she was up on her toes just slightly to wrap her arms around his neck, pulling his face into her shoulder. "I know it's terrible. But you did everything you could, and we're just going to have to live with that."

"I know." Thena did know--she had sat in for the final leg of his plea. She had witnessed his loss and she had been the one to restrain him from mouthing off to the judge presiding and possibly losing his license. "It's not fair."

"What are we doing?" he asked, even hiccuping faintly as he closed his arms around her as well. He was a mess, probably stank of beer, and he shouldn't have been here in the first place. But he melted into Thena's good graces, letting her absorb some of his misery for him. "What good is any of this if I couldn't protect her?"

"That wasn't your job today," Thena whispered to him, and it felt as if it was right next to his ear. "Your job was to argue for her in her place, and you did that. You fought with all you had. But the law wasn't on our side, today. And there will be more days like this."

He knew that. He'd had hard cases before, lost cases before. But never anything like this. He'd had his faith in the judicial system and the court system and the social work system waver before--it came with the job. But now he wasn't sure how he was ever supposed to go back to work again.

"You lost a case, and it's never easy. But what that girl's parents are enforcing is not your fault."

It sure fucking felt like it was. Gil could still remember the look on the kid's face as it sunk in that it really was over, that they had lost and that her parents had every right to drag her back with them. He had handed her back the card with her birthday money in it, unable to accept it after their defeat.

"Come on," Thena leaned back, putting a hand on his cheek, probably checking his eyes to see if he was sober enough to make it back to his car. If she even called him an uber and watched him slump himself into it, it would already be more than he deserved.

"Yeah," he cleared his throat, swallowing the lump in it. He looked around the parking lot, increasingly empty by this time on a work night. "I, uh, left my car back at work. It's probably where my wallet is, a-actually. I should-"

"We can get it tomorrow, Gil," she cooed in that melodic voice of hers. She insisted it was like cold, hard ice, but he thought it was gentle and elegant, like a curtain dancing in a window.

"I've gotta get home," he all but whimpered. What a wet blanket he was being, but whatever. He pulled out his phone again, attempting to find an uber she could toss him into and be rid of him.

"I know, come on," Thena pulled at his arm gently. And when he stumbled anyway she leaned closer, letting him rest his big, meaty shoulder against her little one. "I'll get you home."

He just stared. She looked really pretty in the streetlight glow, all blurry at the edges like it was a dream sequence in a movie. "You didn't have to come and get me."

She raised an eyebrow at him. "Was I to leave you drowning in your beer?"

It would be a fitting end, at least. But he shrugged, leaning on her as little as he could afford as they made their way to her car. "You shouldn't have to deal with the aftermath of my shit."

But she shouldered him easily, getting him to the passenger door first and unlocking it with her fob. "We have the same job, Gil. Same job, same shit--I know what it's like to want to dive head first into a pool of cheap wine coolers and forget everything we've ever learned."

But she didn't, that was the difference. Because Thena had other obligations and responsibilities. And took them seriously, unlike how he had come over here without even his wallet somehow.

Gil leaned against the top of the car before letting her elbow him in. She was supporting him under his other arm, tucked into his side. He would rather be supporting her, like he had after she broke her arm. "Thanks, Thena--even if you're seeing me make a huge ass out of myself."

She gave him a really sweet smile as she separated herself from him at last, letting him get into the car seat. "Quite impossible."

She even closed the door for him, being a real gentleman to his drunk ass. Gil crossed his arms, tilting his head as he looked out her windshield. "I don't think that's true."

But she climbed into the driver's seat without a word, not wasting any time as she began backing out. "I've only picked you up a few times, but I believe I remember the way."

"You'll be fine," he murmured, still with a slight slur to his words. He would let her go and if he really had to correct her, he would. "Just look for a depressing bachelor complex and I'll be on the left."

Thena let out a laugh, which added at least some levity to the night.

She had a cute laugh. He looked at her again, although hopefully with her focused on the road she would just think he had a sore neck or something. "Y'know, maybe we should change firms."

"What makes you say that?"

He shrugged, his eyes getting fuzzy again. He was tired. "I mean, we're not allowed to do any pro bono work, which sucks. I know it's a small firm but come on."

"I do agree with you on that one," she muttered quietly. She could act all 'ice queen' if she wanted to, he knew she also had a soft spot for the kids they ended up working with.

"And the guys at the office," Gil made another face, but Thena was driving so she couldn't appreciate how funny it was. He made a noise to accompany it. "I don't like the way they look at you."

Thena didn't answer for a few minutes, probably trying to actually focus and navigate amidst his yapping. "I didn't think you noticed."

He blew a a raspberry, although with his dry lips it really sounded more like a wet fart. "Please, those pigs think they're being subtle when they look at you like--well, they're not, is what I'm getting at. And they wonder why I don't like them."

Thena let out a faint laugh again as she made a turn. She was driving a little slowly, but that was probably because she was afraid she would jerk him around too much and risk him hurling on her nice off-white interior. "I figured you were just too nice for their crass tastes in drinking buddies."

"Not disgusting enough, more like," Gil huffed again. He had to reel himself in and keep from divulging anything else. He didn't ever want to have to repeat to Thena the kind of language he'd heard them use to refer to her when they thought no one was listening.

And it didn't matter how many times he told them not to talk about her like that. All it ever did was get them convinced he was sleeping with her and beg him to tell them all about it.

"You would leave the firm just because of them?"

He slumped down further in his seat. He wasn't paying nearly enough attention to direct Thena if needed, but it was kind of nice just being in the car with her. Just them, a quiet drive, not even Sersi or Sprite or the loud, bouncy pop they liked to listen to between them.

Well, he did like some of the music they made him listen to.

"It wouldn't be just for that reason, there are more," he sufficed to say. But then he dragged himself up again and looked at her. "But I wouldn't leave without you."

Thena, driving, spared him a quick glance. She seemed surprised. "You wouldn't?"

"Of course not," he scoffed more lightly this time. Because that question was actually funny. "If anything, you're the reason I stayed past my probation period."

He wasn't supposed to tell her that. Well, he hadn't wanted to admit it to her, and certainly not like this. Whoops.

"Well," Thena began as they pulled into the parking lot of his building (unfortunately). Her voice really was like a lullaby. He had to wonder if he would even make it inside, at this rate. "If you decide to leave...then so will I."

[zerothisnero]

Mfs be like "I enjoy the holidays because it brings families and friends closer and it becomes a time of being thoughtful and giving to those you love and cherish the most"

And I'm just here like:

[ghoul--doodle]

There’s a kid who recently started working at the charity store I work at and we’re usually working at the same time

And he’s a sweet kid but.

He stims all the time and in such a way that it triggers my misophonia and I feel SICK and there’s ✨sweet fuck all✨ I can do about it

[deepseaspriteblog]

WAIT WOH RESETS YOUR PROGRESS FOR THE FULL RELEASE?? I had spent so long fully completing it every time a new update came out :(

I GENUINELY don't know if it's just me and I either fucked up or it's a glitched, or if it's for everyone ;0; Really sucks either way. Having to re-get Moriko and Yashiro is the absolute worst.

[e-m-p-error]

Which of your muses is the best at cooking?

Which of them is the worst at cooking?

Which of your muses is more likely to burn their food, whether or not they can cook?

Which of your muses is more likely to eat something even if it has fallen on a dirty floor?

Which of your muses is more likely to talk in their sleep?

Which of your muses sleeps the most?

Which of them is more likely to suffer from insomnia?

Which of your muses is more likely to have sleepwalking episodes? {{ Pick whichever muses. <3 }}

𝐓𝐄𝐋𝐋 𝐌𝐄 𝐖𝐇𝐈𝐂𝐇 𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐄 !

Which of your muses is the best at cooking?

Vick is really good at cooking! He makes cozy cooking Voxtube videos and it is a way that he relaxes!

Valentino is a surprisingly good cook but it takes a lot for him to cook for someone. He only sees cooking for someone as a sign of love and he will not do it for you if he does not love you dearly.

Velvette is a lover of all things food and enjoys cooking and making potions. She can heal you with her food or kill you with it depending on what she wants to do!

Bee is a fantastic cook and she prides herself on her food conjuring!

Which of them is the worst at cooking?

Ostello cannot cook very well at all. He could probably burn water and has made mistakes while trying to cook. Usually he orders food in.

Fizzarolli is an awful cook, he can burn cereal and nobody knows how he's done it.

Cash is a good cook if and only if you count preparing frozen meals and boxed dinners as cooking.

Which of your muses is more likely to burn their food, whether or not they can cook?

Fizzarolli, hands down. He can burn anything even if he doesn't cook. Don't let him get involved with food preparation.

Which of your muses is more likely to eat something even if it has fallen on a dirty floor?

Cash will eat anything even if iit's off the floor or in the dirt. Food is food.

Barbie is the same way, she learned from her daddy.

Mammon will scoop food off the floor to eat it if he likes it enouogh.

Which of your muses is more likely to talk in their sleep?

Valentino murmurs a lot in his sleep when he's dreaming. He doesn't speak very clearly, however.

Bee talks in her sleep but her words never make much sense.

Athan talks a lot in his sleep and is very forthcoming with information when sleepy.

Which of your muses sleeps the most?

Already answered here!

Which of them is more likely to suffer from insomnia?

Vick suffers from insomnia like nobody's business. It was a problem when he was alive, too, and is the reason why he died.

Which of your muses is more likely to have sleepwalking episodes?

Fizzarolli has them from time to time.

[where-does-the-heart-lie]

More Doki Doki Battle Academy OP AU

even MOOROEEE of themmmmmahhhhhhh babyeyyy i even added some dialogues fir some extra flavourrrrr (kuma and bonney's gif there would be a sprite he would have in his dialogue scenes. i dont think it would be a gif like this, more like everytime you look back at him, bonney would be in a different spot)

original DDBA designs post (has more lore there, go look at it plese :3

ASL dialogue video

imagining the vinsmoke/strawhat beef going like this video

design stuffs and more lore:

preface: sorry this is so much writing and im not going to grammar check it cuz aint no body got time for that.

The world of this au is like pokemon with different gyms you can fight through and beat, there's a big league of pro fighters, and there are schools for teaching you to be a better fighter.

One of the schools is called the Germa 66 Private Battle Academy, it goes from grades 1-12 and its where the Vinsmoke siblings all went too (at least until sanji broke off from the family at some point) and its run by Judge Vinsmoke, their father.

i am thinking that the Vinsmoke kids would still be genetically modified and Kuma would be a cyborg in this too.

design stuffs:

Ichiji: i tried to make him as punk as he would feasably get away with living under his father's rule. Big "combat" boots, fingerless gloves, black undershirt. He likes his style and would probably go all out if he didnt have to conform to his school uniform, thus i put a little heart on his boots.

Niji: i also made him like his style. The rings on his fingers, his nikes shoes, his big headphones. Like a gamer who thinks this is what fashion is. I think he would love listening to music too so i put his heart on his headphones.

Yonji: big stakly guy. Hes a lot more hands-on than his brothers so i put lots of emphasis on that area. i put his heart on his hand wraps because i think he would really love fighting. I think that Yonji is most like his father in that enjoyment, but i think Judge wouldnt like how casual Yonji's style is.

Reiju: y2k queen. I love this design on her so much im so bummed that she would have already graduated from the academy and i cant put her in a Hit Me Baby One More Time-esque uniform outfit, shed fucking KILL THAT SHITTT. Anyway though, reiju's heart is subtle yet in plain view, the locket around her neck. i dont think she would let anyone look at the contents but i do think that absolutly it would be her mother on one side and her brothers on the other. She wouldnt like people looking at it because that would mean someone could see that her dad isnt in there and she would get it a lot of trouble with her father about it.

Power ranger fits: i made them full on power rangers. its what they deserve. Since reiju has a butterfly motif in canon, i thought it would be fun to also give her brothers a bug motif of their own. ichiji is a wasp, niji is a dragonfly, yonji is a stag beetle. If sanji stuck around, hed probably be a lady bug lol. Also the masks they wear, the eye window part, it’s like tear tracks coming out but in a way that doesnt look like thats what they are. But it’s meant to show how judge forcing his children to be these people is causing them pain.

thank you @zethsdumpster for being my Vinsmoke specialist and helping me come up with a lot of their design stuff!

Doflamingo: i tried to make him a Nasty Nasty man. Like if a used car salesman made it big. Like if Macklemore was MackleMORE. i love the idea that he likes to tan himself, but he doesnt take any of his clothes off to do so, so he just has the absolute craziest tan lines ever. i put his hearts on the gold chain around his neck, he loves his wealth but not much else. i love the idea of him having two very expensive watches on each wrist. there may be more watches up his sleeve too. i also gave him fluffy dice around his neck, like he's one of the cars that he's selling.

Rosinante: i couldnt get away much longer without putting the heart man into the heart 'game'. i couldve went off more with the hearts of his design but i didnt want him to become nearly as flashy as his brother. i wanted him to be understated and fade into the background when doflamingo is around. he is dead in this au btw sorry :/ this is his design when he passed, but doffy's design is present day him. anyway, Rosi's hearts are everywhere, its in the outline of his big huggable fluffy coat, its on his hat thats pulling him down, it would be on his shirt too if it wasnt covered by his coat in this image.

Bonney: SHEEES SO CUUTEEEE AAAAAAAA i love her. I based her design off of Avril Lavigne with her iconic necktie/tanktop/baggy pants looks. i tried to make her outfit look like she could feasibly fit in it when she ages herself up, especially her big ol shoes. the heart in her design is in her neck tie. The stereotypical visage of a dad is a man in a tie who goes to work, and she loves her dad, so her heart is in her dad tie.

Kuma: I didn't change much of him from his design in canon, but since bonney would be more in his life in this version, i wanted to give him more visual indicators of her being there. like the height chart on his leg, or the fuzzy hat she crocheted for him (she also made her own hat for herself). Also, the pattern on his shirt is one that looks like a paw, but if you took off that outer layer, if the pattern continued, the design would be a sun, and i just think that was really clever ehe ehe.

Hancock: Basically i tried to make her the baddest bitch in the universe. My program crashed like 3 times making her which is so funny. Procreate couldnt handle her. I based her design off of Medusa. at first i had her snake be made out of marble, but it eventually wound up at Obsidian. She has no visible hearts on her design and thats because it would be the scar on her back, which she tries to hide. i like the idea that this very visibly revealing outfit would be perfectly tailored and reinforced to never move a single inch to let anyone see what theyre not supposed to. I dont know how i would justify her being able to turn people into stone in this AU, so im just not going to make a decision on whether or not she can do that.

ive been working on these designs off and on ever since i made the first post on this au and im real happy i can finally put more out.

if you got to the end of this, thank you so much for reading~ i hope you enjoyed :)

[anxious-witch]

Sometimes I think about how Crystal is a voice for other girls/women throught entirety of S1. How she convinces Charles and Edwin they need to go save Becky Aspen, how she immediately notices something is wrong with Niko and insists they investigate and then puts herself in danger to get the sprites out of her without killing her, the way she says "you are telling me these women have been reliving the most painful moments of their life over and over again for 30 years?!" In the Devil's family episode, how she immediately believes and speaks out for Shelby, even before having concrete proof Brad and Hunter are assholes and has no issues arguing with Charles over it, how she sympathizes with Maren.

She speaks out and does her best to help all these women, because she herself felt helpless and alone. And one time she cannot do anything but watch as Niko dies, her anger at the injustice is so strong, she reaches out to Lilith through Esther and screams at a goddess. She, who has been scorned so many times, asks for nothing but for justice for all the little girls she couldn't save. For Niko.

Just. God, I love her so much and the fact that she is allowed to be both angry and kind at the same time and that her anger is often driven by the fact she is so kind at her core makes me kinda insane.

[remxedmoon]

so all you need to do right now is disappear.

HHHHAPPY ISATVERSARY EVERYONE. here’s redraws for every single battle cg in the game. 36 drawings this time around, with 11 of those being custom (though admittedly a good portion of those are edits). combined with the portrait redraws i made back in september, i’ve made 114 redraws for this project! jesus christ! just like those redraws, these are completely free to use!! as long as i’m credited and it’s not for commercial purposes, go wild!! do whatever you want!!!

no i didn’t make these for isat’s 1 year anniversary this is just wildly good timing.

i genuinely can’t fit all of these cgs in one post even with the 30 image limit on browser, but i’ll still try to fit Most of them below the cut (without making this post horrifically long), along with some notes that might be important 👍

okay! once again, i labeled all of the custom art as such in the drive(UPDATE. NNOT TRUE ANYMORE. reformatted file names to be easier to mod in auau. apologies!), but if you want a full list, the customs are hatless siffrin jackpot, bonnie jackpot, bonnie special attack, bigfrin attack, and a bunch of alts which are definitely not related to any projects i’ve been thinking about don’t worry about it. and out of those customs, only like. 3 of them are actually completely from scratch.

while i did my absolute best to keep the aspect ratios completely the same as the originals, there’s 3 exceptions that i just couldn’t get to work.

isabeau’s hair in his special attack cg wouldn’t fit in frame if i kept things completely accurate to the og, so i moved his cg down a bit. it shouldn’t cause any issues with modding or anything, it’ll just appear slightly lower than it does in game. alas…

isabeau’s sleeve and mirabelle’s hair made their jackpot sprites a little larger than the originals? i’m hoping this doesn’t have too much of an effect (since the jackpot sprites have inconsistent sizes) but i can’t test this myself unfortunately. aaa feel free to let me know on discord if any problems arise!!

i managed to fix these, so they aren’t going to cause problems now, but my original drawings for mirabelle and siffrin in the final attack scene were a pain in the ass to fix. mirabelle’s sprite was slightly too talk to fit in frame and siffrin’s hat whacked bonnie in the face while i was editing everyone together. i’m only mentioning this because it took like an hour and a half to fix them and finish the scene.

all that aside, these were a fucking BLAST to work on. apparently this ended up taking 57 hours over exactly 10 days. which is a little worrying if you do the math on that but somehow i have not burnt myself out. i will be doing enemies at some point!!! but probably not for a little bit. i think my friends will actually kill me if i don’t take a break.

once again, happy birthday isat. you’ve ruined my life and i wouldn’t have it any other way (silly).

also, on an actual serious note, this little timeloop game has genuinely changed my life for the better? you guys are probably sick of hearing it at this point (or maybe not, i don’t talk about myself That Much. i hope), but i was practically a ghost for about 2 years before joining this fandom. it’s a little surreal to suddenly have friends (plural!!!) and people who Care about me, or even know i exist, honestly. it’s weird!! in a good way!!!

i don’t think i would’ve ever come back to social media if this community wasn’t so welcoming. i’ve met a lot of really great people through this game!!! so, uh, thank you isat, i guess. here’s to another year.

[tpwk-formula1]

Hiii! Just read your fist pizza order and I looooved it so I thought I might as well give you some writing to do!

Could I please have a pizza with cauliflower crust, Alfredo sauce, banana peppers and broccoli? With some sprite and lemonade and dessert please! And served by franco (I need him to be the sunshine in this)!

Thank you so so much 🥰🥰

Lee-Lee's Pizzeria Menu

cauliflower grumpy x sunshine Alfredo sauce sweet sex banana peppers "Look so pretty riding my cock" broccoli "Made just for me huh?" sprite size kink lemonade body worship dessert yes served by Franco Colapinto

Franco x grumpy! girlfriend

TW A short one, morning sex, riding, unprotected sex

WC 800+

Y/N POV

"Good morning pretty girl," Franco mumbles when he starts to wake up from my nails running across his shirt-covered back. He starts turning onto his side and pulling me slower to his chest making me groan.

"It's too early," I mumble back making Franco giggle softly at my morning moodiness.

"Why is it that your alarm always wakes me up and never you?" I question with an arched brow making Franco's face heat slightly from being called out before he just shrugs. He'd much rather wake up to his girlfriend's touch anyway.

"Come on baby, we have a big day!" Franco says with far too much excitement making me bury my face back into his chest not waiting to leave the bed.

"No," I grumble gripping onto the back of Franco's shirt not wanting him to get out of the bed either.

"Come on," Franco says dragging out the "n".

"20 minutes," I say coldly making Franco giggle but relax slightly into my arms.

"Gonna make us late baby," Franco says but still making not move to get out of bed.

"Babe, we don't need to be in the paddock for another 3 hours, 20 minutes wont kill us," I tell him making him shrug.

"Just excited for my first race," Franco says with a smile on his face making me smile softly at him.

It was Monza race day which means it's Franco's first Grand Prix in Formula 1 and he has been extremely anties the whole time.

"I know, and I'm happy for you," I tell him softly before pulling him in for a soft kiss.

What was supposed to be just a quick peck slowly turns into a heated makeout session, resulting in me climbing into Frnaco's lap and grinding down on his hardening cock.

"Fuck baby, we don't have time," Franco groans making me grind down harder, making both of us whine at the pleasure coursing through us.

"Please, we have time," I say while pulling off the shirt I had slept in the night before. I start pushing Franco's shirt up to reviel his tones abs and chest when I instantly lean down and start kissing him neck and chest before pushing myself down a little further pulling his boxers down slightly before pulling his cock into my mouth for a soft suck making Franco groan.

"Fuck baby, so good," Franco groans when I start bobbing my head softly.

"We'll be quick," I say as if he needed any further convincing.

"Come ride me, baby," Franco says clearly having no patience. I just giggle and roll my eyes at his neediness before climbing back into Franco's lap and sinking down his cock when I pull my thong to the side.

"Fuck," I groan at the stretch before I slowly start rocking my hips trying to gain stimulation before I start bouncing up and down making Franco moan.

"Look so pretty riding my cock," Franco moans out softly making my face heat up slightly at the praise.

"It's so good baby," I mumble softly.

"Fuck, always so good for me," Franco groans moving his hands to my hips and giving them a hard squeeze before he starts helping me bounce on his cock.

"I'm close," I moan out already starting to get shakey legs, which has Franco flipping us over so he was now hovering over me and pounding into my pussy making me moan and whine at the stimulation.

"Fuck," I moan when the new angle has Franco hitting a new spot deep in my pussy.

"It's like you were made just for me, Huh?" Franco states bringing a hand down to my clit making me clench around his cock ready to cum.

"Please can I cum," I beg needing my release.

"Cum for me," Franco groans before sending me over the edge into a strong orgasm and squeezing around Franco's cock making him pull out and cum all over my tummy.

Once both Franco and I have come down from our highs he slowly climbs out of bed and pulls his boxers off all the way before pulling my thong off and picking me up and taking me into the bathroom.

Once he turns the shower on and lets the water heat up Franco takes my hand into his pulling me to join him.

We spent the next 20 minutes cleaning each other off before we got out and started getting ready for race day.

"Told you we had time," I saw with a smirk when we walked into the paddock hand and hand 15 minutes earlier than we needed to be.

Franco just laughs and shakes his head before kissing my forehead softly.

"Gonna get us in trouble one of these days," Franco says making me smirk and shrug.

"You wouldn't change it for the world though."

[rafesslxt]

✧.* 𝐒𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐄 𝐍‘ 𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐄 | 𝐭.𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐭

જ⁀➴ tik tok trend that drives your bf Theo insane

: ̗̀➛ warnings: none

"Oh cara mia no, the last one wasn‘t funny. Please don‘t torture me again.." he sighs frustrated.

I giggle and and pull him after me towards the table with all the drinks on them, the rest of our friends already standing around it.

"I am not! I just wanna show you a tiktok trend."

He rolls his eyes way too dramatic for my liking but I ignore it and smile when I see everything I need in front of me.

I take a wine glass, his eyebrows raising at the sight and he whines. "Oh noo don‘t ruin the wine I am begging you amore!" He grabs the wine bottle and holds it out of my reach.

"Theo! Give me the bottle, I just wanna show you something!" I argue, trying to reach the wine bottle and sigh dramatic too now. "Pleeeease.“ I look at him with the best puppy eyes I have to offer so he gives in.

"Please don‘t make me questioning your brain again. Please." he almost begs and lets his right hand glide over his face in frustration and fear what I am about to do to his beloved wine.

"You‘re gonna drive him crazy some day." Enzo giggles and watches what I‘m about to do like the rest

I pour some wine into the glass and grab the little shovel for the ice and put some of them into the wine. "No love, no! You don‘t put ice in your wine."

"And theeen you take some sprite.." i start to pour some of it in too now and swirl the glass a little so the two liquids mix.

"Oh tesoro, qual è il punto, è un peccato!" Theo starts throwing hands into the air and curses as If I killed someone he loves.

"Wait that actually looks good, let me try." Mattheo says, taking the glass out of my hand and and taking a sip. "Damn this does taste good!" he laughs after swallowing down.

"Oh stai scherzando!��� Theo groans when he see‘s all of his friends trying it too and actually liking it. "Baby please try it, I promise you it is good." "Oh no principessa not in a million years." he says disgusted.

"Fineee but you are missing out." "Please don‘t do this when you meet my parents for the first time." he begs me in a still frustrated tone. "No don‘t worry Theo. I‘ll drink my espresso together with my pasta like a pro." "WHAT?! Oh caro dio aiutami per favore.."

i would love to do something like that with him omgggg this would be so funnyyy

also i love short little things like that, should i do them more often? 🤞🏻

taglist: @sofa-couch26 @justarandomcanadiantransdude @helendeath @thatonepansexual2000 @imabee-oralizard @supernaturaldawning @auxcordlawd @itsarajr @hisparentsgallerryy @mixvchelle @ummmmmmm-username @belle-blue @beautywine @sagetakami @simp-for-fantasy @whyamireadingthis

「 ✦ for more: my masterlist and taglist ✦ 」

xoxo sarah <3

[xichilie]

UR PHIANON PURDICAMENT WRITING WAS SOOSOSO CUTE 🥰🥰🥰

Would you mayhaps consider making a version where mydei somehow gets turned into one too 🙏😇

NO PRESSURE, LOVE THE FOOD ANYWAYS!!!!!!!

Mydei x (fem) reader

Mydei’s Feline Misfortune

The streets of Amphoreus were alive with movement, a labyrinth of twisting alleys and flickering lanterns casting long shadows against ancient stone walls. The scent of sizzling meats and fresh bread mixed with the salty sea breeze, creating a deceptive sense of peace.

But Mydei had no time for distractions.

His eyes were locked onto a faint purple glow bobbing and weaving through the marketplace—a tiny, mischievous sprite with an all-too-familiar smirk.

Bartholos.

The Spirit Thief.

A thorn in his side.

It had been a simple task—secure an artifact, return it to its rightful owner. But of course, Bartholos had other plans.

The little trickster had snatched it right out of his hands.

And Mydei was not letting it get away.

He darted through the crowd, dodging startled merchants and vaulting over crates, his movements swift and precise. Bartholos giggled—an eerie, echoing sound that sent a shiver down his spine—as it twirled mid-air, effortlessly keeping ahead of him.

“Come back here, you wretched little—”

Bartholos whirled around mid-flight, its glowing eyes gleaming with mischief.

“Oh, you’re no fun, Mydeimos!” it cooed. “Why don’t we make this more interesting?”

And before Mydei could react—

A flash of purple light engulfed him.

The world tilted. His vision blurred, his body felt strange—

Then, just as suddenly as it happened, the light vanished.

And something was very, very wrong.

The first thing he noticed was how low to the ground he was. The second was the unsettling sensation of fur.

His limbs felt—shorter. His ears twitched. His tail—TAIL?!

Bartholos floated overhead, cackling.

“Oh, now this is delightful! You’re adorable, Mydeimos!”

Mydei hissed.

HE H I S S E D.

His pupils narrowed into thin slits as his ears flattened against his head, golden eyes burning with fury. He tried to lunge at Bartholos, but instead of his usual, imposing form—

A tiny, furious cat leaped at the spirit.

Bartholos dodged effortlessly, giggling all the while. “Now, now! You should be thanking me. You’re much more agile like this!”

Mydei landed awkwardly, his tiny paws slipping slightly on the stone street. He shook himself in absolute outrage.

This could not be happening.

He was Mydeimos.

Prince of Kremnos.

A Chrysos heir.

Not—A CAT.

He was going to kill Bartholos.

As soon as he figured out how to walk properly.

The Spirit Thief cackled, twirling midair just out of reach.

“Oh, Mydeimos, I must say—” Bartholos snickered. “You make a very dashing little feline!”

Mydei’s golden fur bristled as he tried to puff himself up, his tail lashing behind him.

He was going to rip this damn spirit apart.

If only he could—

MOVE PROPERLY.

He lunged. Or at least, he tried to.

What should have been a powerful, warrior’s leap turned into a clumsy pounce, his paws slipping against the stone street. He went skidding forward, his tiny body tumbling in an embarrassing roll before coming to a stop on his back.

The worst part?

Bartholos was wheezing.

The spirit’s entire form flickered wildly, as if it could barely hold itself together from laughter.

“Oh, this is great! I didn’t even have to do anything!”

Mydei growled, flipping himself over and crouching low, ears flattened in pure feline rage.

This body was infuriating.

He tried again, paws scrabbling against the pavement, but every time he attempted a proper sprint, his movements felt awkward, wobbly— his instincts told him to move differently, but his warrior’s mind refused to accept it.

Bartholos, delighted beyond words, twirled in the air once more.

“I’d love to stay and watch you humiliate yourself further, but alas, I have places to be!”

Mydei swiped at him with his tiny claws, but the spirit only giggled, dodging effortlessly.

“Good luck, little prince! Try not to get stepped on!”

And with that, the spirit vanished in a flicker of purple light, leaving only the faint echo of laughter behind.

Mydei stood there, fur bristling, completely and utterly livid.

He had just been turned into a helpless little housecat.

He took a slow breath, his ears twitching in irritation.

Fine.

He’d deal with Bartholos later.

Right now, he needed to find a way to fix this mess.

With that goal in mind, Mydei stalked off, determined—despite his ridiculous new body

Mydei stalked forward—or at least, he tried to.

His tail lashed, his ears twitched in irritation, and every step felt wrong.

Walking on four legs was infuriating. His balance was all over the place, and his once-powerful strides were now tiny, careful steps. A part of him knew he should just embrace the feline instincts taking over his body, but his mind—his warrior’s mind—rejected it outright.

He was Mydeimos. A warrior. A Chrysos heir. Not some delicate little house pet.

And yet—

His paws padded silently against the stone streets of Okhema as he forced himself forward, keeping to the shadows. The last thing he needed was someone spotting him like this.

(If Phainon saw him, he would never live it down.)

He made it halfway down an alley before something caught his attention.

A flicker of movement.

A large metal bucket teetered on the edge of a wooden cart. Someone must’ve left it poorly balanced, because with the slightest gust of wind—

CRASH!

The sound shattered the silence, and Mydei jumped.

Not just a normal startle—no, his entire body reacted instinctively.

His fur puffed up so violently that he looked twice his size. His back arched, claws unsheathed, tail bristled like a bottlebrush—

And worst of all?

He let out a sharp, startled meow.

Silence followed.

Mydei blinked, realization sinking in.

His ears flattened in sheer mortification.

He took a slow breath, forcing his fur to settle.

No one saw that.

He was fine.

With renewed determination (and a bruised ego), Mydei pushed forward.

Navigating the streets of Okhema as a cat was proving to be a nightmare.

Mydei was used to towering over people, not weaving between their legs. Every step was a new hazard—from careless boots nearly crushing his tail to merchants swinging baskets dangerously close to his head.

Still, he pressed on.

But just as he was rounding a corner, the sound of rushing water reached his sensitive ears.

That’s when he saw it.

A small stone bridge overlooked one of Okhema’s canals, where the river ran through the city. A group of children leaned over the edge, giggling and pointing at something.

Mydei paid them no mind. He had bigger concerns.

Until—

Something smacked into his side.

It was a blur—a running child who didn’t see him. Too late for Mydei to react.

His paws slipped on the slick stones.

And then—

SPLASH.

Cold.

The world went silent.

For a moment, he just sank. The weight of his fur dragged him down as water rushed around him, stealing his breath. His limbs flailed, but everything was wrong—he couldn't move the way he used to, couldn't rely on his usual strength—

He was drowning.

That’s when a pair of hands plunged into the water.

He felt warm fingers wrap around him, lifting him out of the river and into the open air.

Coughing. Sputtering. Shivering.

A soft voice, warm and soothing, broke through the haze.

“Oh, you poor thing…”

Y/N.

She held him close, cradling him against her chest. Water dripped from his fur, soaking into her clothes, but she didn’t seem to mind.

Mydei, however, was mortified.

A low, miserable grumble escaped him as he shivered violently, his soaked fur clinging to his body.

Y/N chuckled, pressing a gentle hand to his tiny head. “Aww, you must be freezing.”

He bristled. Freezing and humiliated.

Before he could wriggle away, she wrapped him up in her cloak, cocooning him in warmth. The sudden contrast of cold water and her body heat made him still for a moment.

He felt… safe.

“I’ll take care of you,” Y/N murmured softly, rubbing his back to warm him up.

Mydei hated how much he melted into it.

(He was still going to kill that spirit thief when he got his hands on it.)

Y/N carried the drenched cat into her home, her brows furrowed in concern as she carefully shut the door behind her. The poor thing was shivering, and she could feel the slight tremble in its tiny body.

"You're a mess," she murmured, cradling him against her chest as she walked toward the fireplace. "How did you even end up like this?"

Mydei, absolutely humiliated, flattened his ears. He did not want to be handled like some fragile little creature, but at the same time, her warmth was… nice. His soaked fur made everything colder than it should be, and despite himself, he leaned just a little into her hold.

Y/N gently placed him onto a pile of soft blankets near the fire and disappeared for a moment. Mydei let out a long sigh, flicking his tail in frustration. He had been minding his own business, doing his duty as a warrior, and then—that damned spirit thief. He had chased it, and now he was this. Small. Powerless. And worst of all, adorable.

He scowled at the thought.

Just as he thought this wouldn't get any worse

Phainon stepped into the room, shaking off the cold air from outside. "Y/N, I was looking for—"

His words trailed off as his gaze landed on the soaked, grumpy-looking cat curled up in the blankets near the fire.

Silence.

A slow, amused grin spread across his face.

Y/N, who had been rummaging through her cupboards, glanced up. "Oh? Do you know him?"

Phainon barely held back his laughter, crossing his arms as he studied the furious-looking feline. "Oh, I definitely do."

Mydei bristled, his fur fluffing up in absolute rage. His tail lashed behind him, ears pinned back, warning Phainon to keep his mouth shut.

Phainon, of course, did not.

"So, Mydei," Phainon said casually, crouching down beside him. "Rough day?"

Mydei hissed at him, actually hissed, which only made Phainon laugh outright.

"Oh, this is good," Phainon murmured, eyes twinkling with amusement. "I mean, really. Of all things, you got turned into this?"

Mydei growled lowly, narrowing his golden eyes.

Phainon leaned in slightly, grinning. "You know, I always thought you'd make a great house pet. Fierce, protective, a little high-maintenance—"

Swipe.

Mydei's paw shot out, barely missing Phainon's face.

Phainon dodged, still grinning like this was the best day of his life.

Y/N, completely unaware, turned back to them with a towel.

She paused, noticing Phainon snickering and Mydei looking one second away from launching himself at him.

"...Did I miss something?" she asked, blinking.

Phainon very deliberately straightened up, dusting off his coat. "Nope. Nothing at all."

Mydei shot him the deadliest glare a cat had ever given a person.

Oh, he was going to pay for this.

Y/N knelt beside the bundle of damp fur, her brows furrowing in concern. “You poor thing,” she murmured, reaching out to gently scratch behind Mydei’s ears.

Mydei froze.

Phainon, meanwhile, did not. He leaned against the doorframe, grinning like he had just won a bet.

Y/N, oblivious to the tension between them, continued her gentle ministrations. “I’ll get you dried off, don’t worry.” She reached for a soft towel, wrapping Mydei in it and rubbing his fur carefully.

Mydei desperately tried to ignore how warm and soft her hands were. This was humiliating. Not the being-a-cat part—this. The gentle cooing, the soft petting, the fact that Phainon was watching all of this unfold like it was the most entertaining thing he'd ever seen.

“I think he likes you,” Phainon said, biting back a laugh as Mydei tensed.

Y/N smiled. “He’s just cold and tired.” She looked down at Mydei with nothing but kindness. “Aren’t you, little guy?”

Little guy— Mydei physically twitched.

Phainon straight-up wheezed.

Mydei’s tail whipped violently under the towel, and Phainon had to step back to avoid getting smacked.

“Oh, he’s got spirit,” Phainon said, clearly enjoying himself. “I like him.”

Y/N placed Mydei on her lap, carefully inspecting his damp fur. “Poor thing. You must be starving.”

Phainon snorted.

Oh, this was too good.

Y/N scratched under Mydei’s chin. “I’ll get you something warm, okay?”

Phainon stared at Mydei’s face, watching as the Kremnoan prince battled between sheer frustration and some deeply buried appreciation for the attention.

Phainon leaned down, smirking. “Enjoying yourself, Mydei?” he whispered low enough for only him to hear.

Mydei hissed.

Phainon dodged another furious swipe, laughing the entire time.

Y/N hummed softly in the background, focused as she stirred a small pot over the stove, filling the home with the warm scent of honeyed herbs and vegetables. The little golden cat sat quietly on the windowsill, his tail flicking with building frustration as Phainon stood near the table, leaning casually against it, arms crossed and lips curled into a smug grin.

“Well, well, who would've thought,” Phainon drawled. “The great Mydeimos—brought down by a prankster spirit and turned into... this.” He gestured dramatically toward the feline, who narrowed his golden eyes in warning.

Mydei’s ears flattened.

“Honestly,” Phainon chuckled, “I’m not even mad. It’s kind of poetic.”

Mydei let out a growl—not a particularly intimidating one, but angry enough. His claws flexed against the wood. His body tensed.

“You look ridiculous, by the way,” Phainon added, clearly unable to help himself. “I mean, look at you—tiny, fluffy, and helpless. I don’t think I’ll ever let you live this down.”

That was it.

With a furious yowl, Mydei launched himself off the windowsill and flew straight at Phainon. He shouted in surprise as the full weight of a determined cat landed square on his chest, claws sinking into his coat.

“WHAT THE—!” Phainon stumbled backward, flailing. “Get off me, Mydei!”

Y/N froze.

Her spoon clattered into the pot as her head whipped around. “Wait—what?”

Phainon blinked. Mydei froze mid-swipe, now half-latched onto his shoulder. Both of them turned toward Y/N, who was standing with wide eyes and an expression that flickered rapidly between confusion and dawning realization.

“You just said—” she pointed at the cat, then at Phainon, “—Mydei?”

Phainon opened his mouth. Closed it. “...Oops.”

Mydei let out a strangled noise that might’ve been a furious growl if it wasn’t coming from his tiny feline throat. He released Phainon with a hiss and dropped to the floor with a soft thump, immediately darting under the table.

Y/N slowly walked forward, peering underneath. There, golden fur puffed and tail twitching, was the cat she’d been nursing back to health and gently cooing at for the past hour.

“You mean to tell me…” she crouched, eyes wide, “this—is Mydei?”

Mydei didn’t move. He just stared back at her with unmistakably human guilt and embarrassment radiating from his big golden eyes.

“Oh my god.” Y/N sat back on her heels, utterly dumbfounded. “I’ve been—carrying you. Talking to you. Letting you sleep on my lap. Scratching behind your ears.”

A small, mortified mewl came from under the table.

Phainon snorted. “Yeah, that one’s been hard to keep quiet about.”

Y/N turned her gaze slowly on Phainon. “You knew?”

He shrugged, grinning. “Of course I knew. How could I not? That furious glare? The offended silence? Classic Mydei.”

Mydei poked his head out from beneath the table, cautiously watching Y/N with wide eyes. He looked... sheepish. Which was saying a lot for a cat.

While phainon explained what happened.

Y/N sighed and rubbed her forehead. “Okay. So let me get this straight. He chased the Spirithief—Bartholos—got caught in one of their tricks and ended up like this?”

Phainon nodded helpfully. “Oh yeah. And now he’s stuck until we figure out how to reverse it. So until then…” He looked at Mydei and smirked. “...He’s your new house cat.”

Y/N stared at Mydei again.

And despite everything—despite the absurdity, the surprise, the confusion—a laugh escaped her lips.

“I can’t believe this,” she said, reaching under the table. “This is so you.”

Mydei hesitated, then slowly stepped forward. She gently scooped him up, cradling him in her arms. His little ears burned red at the tips, his fur still puffed slightly from embarrassment. He refused to meet her eyes.

“You could’ve just tried writing something in the dirt, you know,” she murmured softly, giving his ear a light scratch. “Instead of attacking Phainon.”

Phainon snorted again from the corner. “You say that like he hasn’t wanted to attack me for years.”

Mydei grumbled in her arms.

Y/N’s voice softened. “Well... I guess I’ll just have to take care of you until we fix this.”

Phainon leaned against the doorway. “Careful. If he likes the attention too much, he might not want to change back.”

That earned him another growl.

Y/N smiled. “Don’t worry. I’ve got you, Mydei.”

The cat in her arms stopped squirming and leaned slightly into her touch, still mortified, still flustered—but maybe, just maybe... a little comforted.

And Phainon, watching them from the doorway, grinned to himself, already drafting a list of nicknames for Prince Meowdeimos.

Bartholos had almost gotten away.

Slipping through shadows and dipping beneath market stalls, it danced over rain-slick rooftops, purple light flickering like mischief trailing behind him. It swirled with delight as it zipped through Okhema’s winding alleys, smug and carefree.

Right up until it zipped straight into a glowing ward.

With a loud zzzzzap! and a startled yelp, the Spirit Thief hit the invisible wall midair and bounced back into a tightly drawn net of shimmering runes.

It's tiny form dropped onto the cobblestone with an indignant squeak, tail flicking wildly as the trap shimmered around him—spell-etched lines and all.

“Got you,” Y/N said calmly.

She stepped out from the shadows of the alley, arms folded and expression sharp—not angry, but stern in a way that made even the spirit’s glow dim slightly.

Bartholos blinked up at her, then flicked it's gaze to the golden-furred cat sitting at her heels.

“Oh... oh this is a problem,” the spirit muttered, inching backward. “You brought her here?”

Mydei, in cat form, sat tall and smug, tail lazily curled around his paws as he gave Bartholos a slow, victorious blink. There was satisfaction in that stare.

Y/N crouched beside the trapped spirit, inspecting it like one might a misbehaving child.

“You turned him into a cat,” she said simply, her voice firm but not cruel.

Bartholos looked around for an escape, but the glowing trap pulsed tighter with every movement. He gave a sheepish shrug. “It was a prank. A little mischief! No harm done.”

“No harm?” Y/N raised a brow. “You stranded him, made him sleep outside, couldn’t speak, couldn’t explain anything—and you let me believe he was just a stray. Do you know how worried I was?”

Bartholos fidgeted. “I mean, he was warm and fluffy. And he did get ear scratches. Sounds like a win.”

Y/N leaned in, gaze narrowing just slightly.

Bartholos shrank under the weight of it.

“I could trap you in a bottle,” she said. “Do you want to live the next week in a jar?”

Bartholos let out a tiny squeak. “...No.”

“I could send you to aglaea

,” she added. “You know how she feels about troublemakers.”

“Okay, okay, okay!” the spirit whined, coiling it's tail anxiously. “I get it. You’re scary! You win!”

Mydei, beside her, let out a pleased rumble in his throat and gave the spirit the most self-satisfied cat smile to ever grace the realm of Amphoreus.

“I’ll fix it,” Bartholos muttered. “I’ll fix it now. Sheesh.”

Y/N stepped back and dispelled the net with a flick of her hand. “Good.”

Bartholos floated in place, rubbing it's arms with a pout. “You’d think being chased by a cat prince was bad enough... now I’m being mom’d.”

Mydei growled softly.

Bartholos flinched. “Okay! Okay!”

With a frustrated swirl of energy, the spirit clapped its tiny hands together. A shimmer of purple magic spiraled around Mydei, lifting him into the air in a glow of light.

In a blink, the cat was gone—and standing in his place, now barefoot and tousled, was Mydei once more.

He straightened slowly, blinking at the world like it was suddenly too big again. “Finally.”

Y/N turned to him with a breath of relief—and before she could say anything, he reached out and gently took her hand.

“I didn’t think you’d actually catch him,” he said, lips twitching upward. “Let alone scare him.”

She smirked. “He deserved it.”

Behind them, Bartholos hovered with a shiver, arms crossed and tail tangled. “Remind me not to prank your girlfriend again,” it grumbled, sulking into the shadows.

Mydei leaned closer, brushing a kiss against her temple. “Remind me not to get on ypur bad side.”

Y/N raised a brow. “What, too scary?”

He grinned. “Terrifying.”

They walked off together, leaving the chastened spirit to grumble in the alley behind them.

Bartholos huffed and folded its arms. “Mortals. No sense of humor anymore.”

But the spirit didn’t try to follow them.

He’d learned his lesson—for now.

[arandomao3user]

Humbly asking for Bernard being a freaky fuck around the Batfam and Tim just being so done

*Insert cracking knuckles*

*Chugs down a bottle of Dr. Pepper*

*Slowly sips from my liter of caffeine in my fridge, don't ask*

Consider it did.

MINORS DNI!

YOU'RE TO YOUNG, YOU'RE TO BEAUTIFUL! (If you don't understand this meme/ vine, then you're definitely to young.)

Bernard, walking into the room:

Dick, talking with Jason:

Cass and Duke, playing a board game:

Stephanie, cheating at Jenga against Damian:

Bruce, discussing plans with a very, very tired Tim:

Bernard:

Bernard, deciding this family can absolutely not have nice things (/j): Hey, baby boy.

Tim, absolutely exhausted, functioning on the caffeine free sprite Jason handed him: Hey, Daddy.

The entire room:

Stephanie: Oh. My. God.

Jason: Would it be triggering to point a gun to my head right now?

Bruce, staring at Bernard like he personally sent him back in time:

Dick, internally screaming:

Bernard: Worth it.

Duke: All y'all judgemental a#&holes, Bruce you forget to turn your comm off so often we might as well be third wheeling to all of you and Catwoman's rooftops f$&# sessions, Dick we've all seen the texts you've publicly had with Kori on the batcomputer, Jason you read erotica novels from Booktok in the living room, Stephanie and Cass have been caught sucking face seven times this past week and it's only Tuesday!

Bruce:

Jason:

Dick:

Cass:

Steph:

Duke, to Bernard and Tim: Happy for y'all, but please have more respect than everyone else in this s#&$ hole. I do not wanna know what my elder bro and his weird a#& boyfriend get into.

Bernard, giving a thumbs up: Thanks, Duke.

Tim so, so sleep deprived: . . . Do you think that animals who don't see colours like us think "why the f#&$% are these guys calling this green thing an orange?"

The entire room:

—

Dick: I wanna watch Mean Girls!

Jason: If you turn on that offensive-to-broadway musical version I will personally disown you.

Tim: Anything besides a musical.

Stephanie: Dirty dancing or nothing.

Cassandra: Wall-E. I will fight you all.

Damian: I wish to watch Heathers! I am officially fourteen and I was promised I'd be able to watch the traffic light women when I was of age!

Jason: The musical was better.

Bernard, to Tim: Wanna go upstairs?

Tim: ??? It's family movie night, gotta watch a movie.

Bernard: I can give you something to watch, and a family if you're up for it~

Stephanie, choking:

Jason: What the F#-%$ did I just hear?

Dick, horrified noises:

Damian: I retract my earlier statement, I wish to be thirteen again and to be to young to hear the things that come from Dowd's mouth.

Tim: Oh, so you guys can hear that over fighting, but not when I ask to pass the salt!?

Jason: I'd say to go suck a d$&#, but you probably would.

Tim: . . . We made out in the library earlier.

Jason, pulling a gun out: HELL NO!

Tim, running already: NEXT TO THE CLASSIC LITERATURE!

Jason, chasing after him: YOU'RE DEAD!

Dick, glaring at Bernard:

Stephanie:

Damian:

Bernard: Also, I vote Wall-E.

Bruce, walking in: Why is Jason trying to kill Tim again?

Cassandra: It is Bernard's fault.

Damian: He—

Bruce, raising his hand: No more information needed.

—

Bernard, in comms: Hey, love dove?

Tim: Not now, Honey Bear, in the middle of a stakeout. Black Mask stuff.

Bernard, lowering his voice: Hmm, did you just "not know" me? Kinda rude, baby.

Tim, blushing: Sorry, bear, just really busy at the moment...

Bernard: Well, try not to get to banged up now, babe, you're gonna need to be ready for when you get home and I—

Damian: Children are present!

Jason: And crime lords.

Dick: Red Robin is suddenly not gonna come home tonight, he'll be staying at the manor. Until he graduates college.

Tim: Nightwing, I don't even have my high school diploma!

Dick: Whoops, guess he's not gonna be home for a while.

Bruce: Please, no personal information in the field.

Jason: I hate this family.

—

Tim, helping Bernard move his stuff to his houseboat: You really don't own a lot, do you?

Bernard: Never needed much, I guess. Kinda used to losing things when I get attached to 'em, parents and all...

Tim: Aw, bear—

Bernard, pulling Tim by his necklace: On the bright side, I don't plan on losing my most prized possession anytime soon...

Tim, swallowing: And what's that?

Bernard: Well, I'd say you, but that'd be rude to refer to you as only an object to me, and a very big lie. But certain parts of you? They're all mine, like you're—

Stephanie, who was helping them move: Oh my actual gods! I wish I could deny you're a real person!

—

Bernard, online, anonymously: Just got to consesually drug and f#&$ Red Robin against his bike! Never kill yourself!

Nightwing, already knowing it's Bernard: Excuse me?

Robin: Count your days.

Red Hood: Your birth certificate has expired, don't even bother sleeping with both eyes open because I will come like death herself and reap the remnants of your soul from your body. Death won't have a chance to let your body settle into cold nor will you see the light. I will ensure every agonizing moment of your death is red hot and dark, and will remain that way till you wake in hell where the punishment you receive there will be a mercy compared to mine, nor will you wake there till mine is fully served.

*Batman likes Red Hood's comment*

Signal: Just watched Red Hood and Nightwing chase a civilian five blocks while Red Robin stumbles after them in a delirious state! Never kill yourself!

*Spoiler posts a video of it to TikTok. Oracle makes sure Bernard can't be identified.*

—

Bruce: Unfortunately, Red Robin has been benched for the next three weeks nor will he be leaving the manor in that time.

Dick: Really Bruce, you grounded your adult son?

Jason: That's a new low, even for you.

Duke: He don't even live with you! What next, is Spoiler gonna get grounded?

Cassandra: How does one get benched and grounded?

Jason: He hasn't done that since me, and the one time he did it, I died!

Bruce: It was more a valid reason this time.

Jason: Oh yeah, what's that?

Bruce:

Babs: Tim was caught giving Bernard a blow job in the backseat of the Batmobile.

Bruce: Hrn...

Damian: WHAT!? MOTHER SAID THAT'S WHERE I WAS CREATED!

Stephanie, choking on her drink:

Cassandra: Better than where I was created.

Dick: I did that with Kori once—

Jason: Same.

Dick: What do you mean same?!

Jason: I retract that statement.

Stephanie: Damn, we only ever made out in the batmobile.

Duke: Have all y'all been defiled in the Batmobile!? Cass!?

Cassandra: . . . Stephanie and I—

Bruce: Grounded. Everyone is grounded.

Jason, walking out: Back to my grave I go, I guess.

Bruce: JASON, NO!

Jason: MAYBE THIS TIME YOU'LL HEAR ME SCREAMING FOR YOU, BRUCE!

Bruce: Jason, No T_T

—

Stephanie: Cute necklace, who got it?

Tim: Oh, Bernard. If you pull it it chokes me.

Stephanie:

Tim: It's pretty though, right?

Stephanie:

—

*At Tim's boat*

Kon: Damn, what happened to you last night?

Tim, with bruises and rope burn and cuts on his visible skin:

Bart: Were you kidnapped and tortured!?

Cassie: You look like you put up a real struggle.

Tim: . . . I spent all night with Bernard.

Bernard, walking out their room, pressing a kiss to Tim's cheek: Oh, hey guys!

Cassie: That explains it.

Bart: H o w ?

Kon: I am so glad I'm not a bat.

Tim, shrugging: Hate the sin, love the sinner.

—

[midnight-shadow-cafe]

NEED jonnhy and reader with a dynamic like "someone's gonna die 😐" "OF FUN! 😎" maybe she's the introvert he adopted back in highschool and they just, stayed together. maybe they're so different that it just ... works. (pretty sure he finds it funny because she reminds him of ghost sometimes, got that same dead stare)

Dead Stare, Loud Mouth

Pairing: Johnny “Soap” MacTavish x Reader

Warnings: Mild language, emotional vulnerability, slow-burn tension, brief mention of combat sims, jealousy, friends-to-lovers tension, fluff, mutual pining, classic Soap chaos.

Author's Note: I hope you enjoy reading this just as much as I enjoyed writing it!!!

Summary: From high school shadows to military partners, you and Soap have always been a study in opposites—his loud mouth and your dead stare somehow making the perfect team. But years of banter and loyalty start to unravel something neither of you expected: deeper feelings that have been simmering beneath the surface for far too long.

Masterlist

MDNI18+MDNI18+MDNI18+MDNI18+MDNI18+

NOW

“Alright, team,” Price started, his voice clipped and sharp. “This is a live sim. Keep your heads on straight.”

You were already eyeing the map, silent, calculating. Meanwhile, Johnny was bouncing on his heels like a kid on a sugar rush.

“This is gonna be so fun,” he grinned, practically vibrating.

You didn’t look up. “Someone’s gonna die.”

He gasped, offended. “OF FUN!”

Your eyes slid to him—slow, unamused, the stare of someone who has not once in her life enjoyed a game of laser tag, let alone a real-life combat exercise with proximity mines and a countdown timer.

Johnny elbowed you gently, grinning. “C’mon, Sprite. Not even a little excited?”

“There are actual landmines.”

“Which makes it a challenge,” he countered proudly, puffing his chest like a Scottish peacock.

“You’re going to break something.”

“My record for Most Heroic Idiot? Aye, probably.”

Ghost, standing nearby, made a small huffing noise—maybe a laugh. Maybe a sigh. Hard to tell with the mask.

“Tell me she doesn’t remind you of me,” he muttered to Ghost.

Ghost gave you a long glance—blank stare, stillness like a waiting blade. Then he nodded once.

Johnny beamed.

——

THEN — HIGH SCHOOL

He saw you for the first time sitting on the back steps behind the gym, hoodie up, earbuds in, reading some massive book that looked like it could knock a man out cold. You didn’t even glance up when the door creaked open and he stepped out.

You just turned the page.

“Hey,” he said, plopping down beside you without permission. “What’re you readin’?”

Silence.

“You always this social?”

Still nothing.

He leaned closer, trying to catch a glimpse of the book cover. You tilted it slightly away from him. Cold. Icy.

He whistled. “Damn. That’s cold. I like it.”

That made you look at him. Just for a second. Eyes flat, unimpressed, utterly silent.

Johnny grinned wider. “I’m Johnny. You’re sittin’ in my usual spot, but I’ll allow it since you look like you’d kill me and bury the body before lunch period ends.”

You blinked. “That’s accurate.”

He laughed. Loud. Sharp. Genuine. “Aye, I knew I liked you.”

And just like that, you had a new shadow.

He stuck to you like a burr. Sat with you at lunch. Walked you to classes. Defended you when some mouthy jerk tried to get a rise out of you.

“You messin’ with her?” he barked one day in the hall, stepping between you and a jock twice his size. “Nah, mate. That’s a bad idea. She’ll curse your bloodline.”

“I didn’t even say anything—”

“You looked at her. With your ugly face.”

You didn’t need him to defend you. You never asked. But you also didn’t stop him.

Because Johnny was... a lot. Loud, chaotic, always smiling. But he never made you feel like a problem. Never asked you to be louder. Just liked you exactly how you were.

And eventually, you started answering when he talked.

Eventually, you called him “Soap,” just to see him smile.

Eventually, you followed him into the military, though you stayed out of the spotlight—quiet, efficient, deadly.

He told the 141 you were his “personal shadow.”

Ghost called you “the other grim reaper.”

You called him an idiot at least once a day.

He loved it.

——-

NOW

The training sim lasted 20 minutes. Johnny triggered two mines. Broke a smoke grenade. Lost a boot.

You made it through unscathed, dropped four targets, and only spoke once—to say “left corner” just before Gaz almost got lit up.

Afterward, you sat on the ground, sipping water, while Johnny flopped beside you like a sweaty retriever.

“You love me,” he panted.

“You’re a hazard.”

“Same thing, darling.”

You didn’t look at him. Just handed him your extra water bottle.

He took it with a grin, eyes twinkling. “You know, when we met, I thought you hated me.”

“I did.”

He blinked. “...Rude.”

You smirked.

Johnny watched you for a moment, softening. “You’ve saved my ass a hundred times over.”

“Because you’re stupid.”

“Nah. Because you care.”

You shrugged, sipping your water. “If you die, I’d have to train a replacement. I don’t like people.”

He chuckled. “Still the same stone-faced menace I found behind the gym.”

You leaned your head lightly against his shoulder, eyes half-lidded. “Still the same loud idiot who doesn’t know when to shut up.”

And in the warmth of the sun, with the others slowly gathering, he let the quiet sit there.

Comfortable.

Loyal.

Safe.

——

LATER THAT WEEK

The bar was too loud.

You never really liked places like this, but Johnny begged. Said the team needed a break, said you needed a break. And you had a hard time saying no to him when he looked at you with those damn puppy eyes.

Now he was two drinks in, laughing with the others, hair sticking up from where he kept running his fingers through it. You were off to the side, sipping your drink, arms crossed, watching him.

You always watched him.

You never thought about it too much—why your eyes always found him in a room, why your ears tuned to his voice like it was a lighthouse in the fog. It was just instinct. Habit.

Or maybe something else you weren’t ready to name.

Tonight, he looked too good in that black t-shirt. Smile too wide. Arms too veiny. Laugh too damn warm.

And then she walked up.

Tall. Pretty. Confident.

Civilian, definitely. She leaned against the bar beside him, touched his arm, laughed like she’d known him for years. And he—charming idiot that he was—laughed back.

Your chest felt tight.

Your drink suddenly tasted like ash.

Gaz nudged you, glancing toward the scene. “Think she’s got a chance?”

You didn’t answer.

Didn’t look away either.

Didn’t realize you were frowning until Price walked past and muttered, “Might wanna ease up on the murder stare, lass.”

You turned your head slowly.

Gaz snorted into his drink.

But Johnny noticed.

His eyes flicked to you, and even through the noise and crowd, he saw it. Something in your face—something rare. Not just blankness.

Irritation. Discomfort. Something that looked a little too close to—

Jealousy.

He excused himself from the woman, brushing her off with a quick joke and a charming apology. She looked confused. He didn’t care.

He made a beeline for you.

“Alright there, Sprite?” he asked, voice low, close to your ear.

You didn’t look at him. “Fine.”

He leaned on the wall beside you. “You looked like you were about to throat-punch that poor girl.”

“She was annoying.”

“She said hi.”

“She giggled.”

Johnny smirked. “That’s illegal now?”

You took a long sip of your drink and didn’t answer.

He tilted his head, eyes narrowing. “You jealous?”

You glanced at him, unamused. “Of what?”

He gave you that look. The one he only saved for you—half playful, half serious, all heart. “Of her touching me.”

Your mouth opened. Closed. Opened again.

“…She was loud,” you finally said, and it felt weak even to your own ears.

Johnny grinned. Not teasing. Just soft.

He reached over, casually tugged your sleeve. “C’mon. Let’s get outta here.”

——

LATER — BASE, OUTSIDE HIS ROOM

The hallway was quiet. Lights low. Everything softer than the bar.

You followed him without a word, like always.

He sat on the edge of his bed, leaned back on his hands. Looked up at you.

You stood there, arms crossed again. Guarded. But not from him.

Never from him.

He patted the space beside him. “Sit, grump.”

You did.

The silence stretched, but it wasn’t awkward. It never was.

“You gonna tell me why that bothered you?” he asked, glancing sideways.

You didn’t answer.

You weren’t sure you could.

He leaned forward, elbows on his knees. Voice quieter now. “You know, I used to think you were just this silent shadow that tolerated me. But you stayed.”

You frowned slightly. “Of course I stayed.”

“Aye. But why?”

You looked at him.

Really looked.

His lashes were thick. His brow furrowed. His hands fidgeted with the seam of his pants—nervous. Something raw in his expression.

And you knew. He wasn’t joking.

You swallowed. “Because you’re... my person.”

That startled him.

Not with shock. But with hope.

He turned slowly. “Say that again?”

You breathed in. Out. Quiet but steady. “You’re my person. You always have been. Since the first time you sat down and refused to leave.”

A beat passed.

Then two.

And then, softly:

“You’re the reason I made it through half my shit missions,” he said, eyes on the floor. “I was reckless, yeah. Still am. But I always came back. Always had something to come back to.”

You stayed still, heart thudding.

He lifted his eyes. “It’s you, Sprite.”

You blinked.

And for the first time in years, your voice trembled. “Johnny…”

He reached out, gently took your hand—his calloused fingers brushing yours.

“I love you,” he said. No hesitation. “Not just as my shadow. Not just as my best friend. I’m in love with you.”

You stared at him.

Not blank. Not dead-eyed.

Soft. Wide. Real.

“…I didn’t know I could feel like this,” you admitted.

“I did.” His smile was small, but real. “I just waited for you to catch up.”

Silence again.

Then you leaned in—forehead against his. Breathing the same air.

And you whispered, “Don’t make me say it.”

He chuckled. “I won’t. I already know.”

And he kissed you.

Not rushed. Not wild.

Just steady.

Like he’d been waiting for it forever.

Because he had.

——

THE NEXT MORNING

Waking up in Johnny’s bed was a surreal experience.

Not because you hadn’t crashed here before—God knows you had. After missions. During long nights of movies or waiting out storms. You’d fallen asleep on his couch, his floor, even once in the passenger seat of his truck with his jacket over your legs.

But this was different.

Because his arm was wrapped around your waist.

Because his face was buried in your shoulder, breath warm and steady against your skin.

Because when you shifted even slightly, his grip tightened with a sleepy groan and a gruff, “Nope. Stay.”

You blinked, watching the ceiling fan spin.

“Johnny.”

“Mmm?”

“You’re drooling on my shirt.”

“It’s my shirt,” he muttered, refusing to move.

“…Still gross.”

He chuckled and finally lifted his head. His hair was a wreck—worse than usual—and his eyes were barely open. But he looked like he’d slept for a hundred years.

And you? You felt… calm.

You never felt calm.

“You alright?” he asked softly.

You nodded. “Yeah.”

He leaned in and kissed your shoulder, like it was the most natural thing in the world. “Good.”

You didn’t say anything else. Didn’t need to.

IN THE COMMON ROOM

You were halfway through your coffee when Gaz spotted the two of you walking in together.

Johnny was grinning. Practically bouncing. Again.

You were… well. You. But your hoodie had a familiar logo on it—his logo. And Johnny kept brushing his fingers against your back like he couldn’t help it.

Gaz blinked. “Wait.”

Johnny just kept smiling.

“No way.”

Price looked up from his paper. Raised a brow. Said nothing.

Soap dropped into his usual chair and grabbed a pastry off Gaz’s plate like it belonged to him. “Mornin’, lads.”

You sat beside him. Didn’t speak. Just sipped your coffee. But your hand stayed on the armrest—fingers loosely brushing his knee.

Gaz stared.

“You—did you finally—?”

Johnny just grinned wider. “Took her long enough, didn’t it?”

You sighed. “You’re insufferable.”

“And you’re in love with me.”

Gaz leaned back, jaw dropped. “I knew it! You’ve been moon-eyed for years, mate.”

“I have not—” you started.

“You have,” said Price flatly, still reading.

You glared at all of them.

Johnny just nudged your knee, smug and warm. “Welcome to hell, sweetheart.”

——

LATER — OUTSIDE, SMOKING AREA

You didn’t usually join Ghost out here. He smoked. You didn’t. But you’d wandered outside for a moment of quiet, only to find him leaning on the wall, mask up to his nose, cigarette between his fingers.

He glanced sideways at you.

You raised an eyebrow. “What.”

“You and MacTavish,” he said simply.

You blinked. “…What about it?”

“You’re together now.”

“Apparently.”

He took a long drag, exhaled smoke into the air. “So now there’s two of him.”

You snorted. “I’m nothing like him.”

Ghost gave you a long, slow stare.

You stared right back.

“…Okay, maybe a little,” you admitted.

“Mm.”

He flicked ash into the tray.

Then, without looking at you: “You make him better.”

That stopped you.

You turned slightly toward him.

Ghost took another drag and muttered, “Less reckless. More focused. He laughs more. Doesn't try to hide when he’s hurt.”

You blinked, surprised.

“…I’m not trying to fix him.”

Ghost glanced at you. “You’re not. That’s why it works.”

You looked down, hands in your pockets. A smile tugged at the corner of your mouth.

“Thanks, Ghost.”

He shrugged. “Just don’t start matchin’ his energy. One of him is plenty.”

You snorted again. “No promises.”

——

BACK INSIDE — LATER THAT NIGHT

You were curled up on Johnny’s couch, blanket draped over your legs, your feet in his lap while he doodled something in a sketchpad. You couldn’t see it. He wouldn’t let you.

“You planning to show me eventually?”

“Nope.”

“Rude.”

He grinned. “You’re rude.”

You rolled your eyes, but the smile on your face gave you away.

He looked at you then—really looked. And you caught it. The softness. The affection. The whole damn universe in his eyes.

“You know,” he murmured, “I used to think I’d lose you.”

You frowned. “Why?”

“Thought I’d push too hard. Be too loud. Thought you’d vanish one day. Fade away.”

You reached over, took his hand.

“I’m not going anywhere.”

“Promise?”

You nodded. “You’re my person, remember?”

He set the sketchpad down and leaned in, pressing a slow kiss to your forehead.

And then your nose.

And then your mouth.

And for once, everything was quiet.

Hope you enjoyed! Please consider liking and reposting! -Midnight💜