#sporking theater

[ghostorbz]

INVADER ZIM HEADCANONS BECAUSE. YAAAYYYYY

!! some zadr !!

Main characters:

-Irken show affection by entangling their antenna together. So Zim wraps his antenna around Dibs hair spike

-Zim shoplifts candy from the store (and Dibs fridge) other times he gets Gir to steal stuff

-Once Dib ate cup noodles for 3 weeks straight. He hasn't done it since

-Dib still has the snarl beast

-He's also very good at drawing, most of his drawings being of him and Zim

-Dib probably gets dizzy when he stands up too fast

-Gaz and Tak like playing games together, Tak is super bad at them though

-Gaz is really into robotics, that's why Professor Membrane doesn't pressure her into science like he does with Dib. In fact she programmed her "security" plushies all by herself

-Gaz HAS and WILL doxx people

-Gir and MiMi are very lady and the tramp coded

-Gir would be best friends with Jenny Wakeman

-Gir CONSTANTLY steals drinks, not only from people he knows either. Like in a restaurant he will just take a big sip of someones drink and walk away

Other characters:

-Zita is a theater kid, she puts the most effort in school plays compared to everyone else

-Carl has literally anything and everything in his beanie. Need a spare pencil? He's got it. Need a notebook? It's in there. Need a bag of chips? You know he has it. But he won't ever give it to you. Like Pinkie Pie except Carl isn't helpful

-Gretchen actually can tell really good jokes, she just doesn't tell them

-Jessica and Letty are lesbian I swear to god they are

-Poonchy is a lot like Tobias from the amazing world of gumball except maybe a little less mean

-Mr. Elliot is Ms. Bitters son, he likes being around her so he got the same job as her (despite her protests)

-Mr. Dwicky probably killed that guy in the vents. Among us imposter ass

-Miyuki and Sporks tallest uniforms seem to be slightly different than Red and Purples, the slight adjustments are there to prevent Zims monsters from eating them

General:

-Hugs from behind are very beloved since you're basically hugging their PAK which is like, their everything

-Irken relationships are heavily looked down upon until they are officialized

-Tallest DNA is used for reproduction by being put in a lil tube until a smeet develops

-Tallest colors are passed down (I don't reaaally headcanon this but I think it's a cute idea)

(Not super invader zim related, but it's one of my favorite headcanons)

-Alien hominid landed on earth after the Irken empire took over his planet. He really hates Zim

(I DON'T KNOW A LOT ABOUT ALIEN HOMINID so like, sorry if I'm ignoring already established lore idk)

[tudorscrown]

call it what you want | young!derek hale

young!derek hale x stilinski!fem!oc warnings: weird things are happening, cringe, read if you dare, alan deaton has rizz? alex being ridiculous navigation | tw masterlist | 1 ; 2 ; 4

After English was Theater with Ms. Hanifysei, then History with Mr. Banditt. Then there was lunch, Novalies favorite time of day.

She was sitting with Alexander Grave and Alan Deaton. Alex is like her brother, but they aren't blood. That doesn't mean that they are any less of family.

"Do you think you can make that shot from here?" Alex said.

"I know I can. They don't call me The Baller for nothing." Alan said, grabbing his trash and going to shoot it in the garbage can from his seat.

"They don't call you that." Nova said.

"Not yet." He said. He took the shot.

"He shoots... and he... misses! Landed right on the table of the infamous Hales!" Alexander narrated. Of course it did. It had to land in the hands of the Hales. Why did they even have the same lunch as them?

"Five dollars that he won't go and get it." Novalie said to Alex.

"You're on."

AT THE HALE TABLE

"Who the fuck threw this?" Laura said as she used a spork to move the trash further away from her.

"I don't know, don't push it near me." Derek said as he moved further away from the mess of napkins in a tray.

"Oh please, you'll heal." Laura said.

Derek made a face at her. Then, they felt someone approaching them.

Alan approached their table. "Sorry, meant for the trash can."

Laura sneered at him. "Then take it back to your table."

Alan snickered. "Why hello there. I'm Alan and you must be Laura. i've heard about you, your family and everything in between."

WITH NOVA AND ALEX

"I can't believe he's actually over there right now." Novalie said as she watched Alan talk to the stoic Laura Hale.

"Please, he's been crushing on her for ages. It's about time he's talked to her." Alex said, picking at his mac and cheese.

Novalie whipped her head around. "What?"

Alex looked up. "You didn't know? As long as I've known him, he's liked Laura."

They looked back at Alan and saw him freezing up as Laura kept coming up with witty comebacks.

"And now he's drowning." Alexander said as he started to get up.

"What are you doing?" Nova said.

"Throwing him a life saver." He said in a 'duh' tone.

Nova sighed and followed him.

"...yeah I mean, you remind me of autocorrect, I can't live without it." Alan winked.

Nova stood to the left of Alan, next to where Derek was seated.

"Sorry about him, he's a little... yeah." Novalie said as she looked from Laura to Derek. Though, she made a face of disgust at Derek.

She grabbed Alan's arm and led him back to their previous table where Alex was sat eating gummies.

"I thought you were going to throw him a life saver?" Nova said as she sat down.

"Hey! I didn't need saving!"

Alex looked from her to Alan. "Life saver?" He was referring to the candy he was eating.

[bookgeekgrrl]

My media this week (29 Sep-5 Oct 2024)

📚 STUFF I READ 📚

😍 i never did believe in miracles (but i've a feeling it's time to try) (cuoredimuschio) - 215K, steddie - a slow burn, perfectly angsted, absolutely hilariously written getting together fic. like, so funny, y'all.

😊 Three Men Out (Nero Wolfe #23) (Rex Stout)

🥰 bittersweet in the sunlight (2bestfriends) - 65K, vampire/werewolf AU, reread, stucky book club pick - what's supposed to be a 'quick & dirty fuck' leads to breaking down centuries of bucky's isolation - a very enjoyable fic

😊 Mystery Magnet (The Last Picks #1) (Gregory Ashe, author; Andrew Gibson, narrator) - entertaining cozy mystery. Wasn't so compelling that I couldn't dip out of it to listen to podcasts but definitely fun enough to finish. And I'll probably read the next one in the series.

💖💖 +56K of shorter fic so shout out to these I really loved 💖💖

Wide Open Spaces (emchant3d) - MCU: stucky, 2K - short & 🔥🔥🔥 skinny!steve/beefy!bucky

📺 STUFF I WATCHED 📺

In Deep: Life at the Bottom of the Ocean With Dr. Sarah McAnulty - Session 3

Dr. Odyssey - s1, e2

Elementary - s2, e1-8

Handsome - Rachel Dratch asks about hometowns

Handsome - Pretty Little Episode #7

The Sam Sanders Show - Joel Kim Booster on Sex, Wealth, and the Comedy Grind

D20: Misfits & Magic 2 - "A Meeting of Misfits" (s23, e1)

D20: Adventuring Party - "A Synecdoche, Like That Ass" (s18, e1)

D20: Misfits & Magic 2 - "Magma and Mingle" (s23, e2)

D20: Adventuring Party - "Dream Small" (s18, e2)

🎧 PODCASTS 🎧

⭐ Who Killed the Video Star: The Story of MTV - ep 4-8

Consider This - Author Robert Caro on the history of power

Re: Dracula - September 30: Let Me Be Your Friend

Code Switch - Ask Code Switch: Is picky eating about taste or race?

The Sporkful - Preserving Jewish Food And Pushing It Forward, With Joan Nathan And Jeremy Salamon

Pop Culture Happy Hour - Nobody Wants This

Short Wave - If Fungi Win, Will We Be Ready?

NPR's Book of the Day - Ta-Nehisi Coates returns to political writing in his new book 'The Message'

All Songs Considered - 'How Women Made Music'

Switched on Pop - Fall Out Boy and the worst earworm ever

Re: Dracula - October 1: Not My Own Master In The Matter

Welcome to Night Vale #255 - The John Peters Imaginary Corn Maze Experience

The Fandom Show - Jurassic Park

Vibe Check - Justice for Pluto!

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - The Diefenbunker

⭐ 99% Invisible - The Infernal Machine

It's Been a Minute - The SMACKDOWN: Rihanna's greatest hits vs. Black Wall Street vs. Route 66

Shedunnit Book Club - The Poisoned Chocolates Case (Green Penguin Book Club 5)

Off Menu - Ep 265: Rick Astley

⭐ Meat + Three - The Bittersweet History of Pralines

Re: Dracula - October 3: The Holiest Love

Signal Cleveland: On Air - From flush to fresh water: a trip through wastewater treatment at NEORSD

Re: Dracula - October 4: It Is Like Death

What Next: TBD - Helene Proves Nowhere is Safe

Short Wave - What Lightning And Black Holes Have In Common

⭐ Strong Songs - Rediscovering Stevie Wonder, with Wesley Morris and Josh Gwynn

⭐ Today, Explained - Puberty hits different now

Morning Edition - FX-Hulu series 'English Teacher' finds comedy in a Texas high school's culture wars

Morning Edition - A dad and his 2 teenage sons loved heavy metal so much they started a band: Narbona

Morning Edition - Batman’s nemesis Joker returns to theaters — this time he’s got a song in his heart

Re: Dracula - October 5: Baptism of Blood

🎶 MUSIC 🎶

Rock Radio • 1980s

Presenting Crosby, Stills & Nash

Charli XCX & Troye Sivan Sweat Setlist

'00s Pop Divas

personal 'Liked Music' playlist

Rock Radio • Pump-up

[dangermousie]

Well, well, well...

I have watched 6 eps of Xianxia Pinkalicious (on ff, I am not a masochist) and:

1. I swear to God, they are all 12.

2. The ML has distracting hamster cheeks.

3. The FL acts like neither a servant, nor victim of abusive family/tragic backstory or even a student (she slaps her supposed immortal teacher.) How she made it to adulthood is beyond me.

4. The vibes of self-published kindle novel with dodgy cover art are STRONG.

5. Nobody in this is much of an actor but nobody is also as terrible as eg Cheng Xiao. This is not the kind of material that can be elevated by an Oscar winner, being compostable and disposable, so honestly, they are all adequate for what is basically a community theater production with slightly (emphasis on slightly) higher production values.

6. There is zero whipping or choking in the first six eps, so I am gonna keep up in anticipation of it popping up later.

7. They are trying to borrow some vibes from Love and Redemption. And failing. But we can’t fault kindergarteners for not being good at college level courses.

8. This is ultimately...harmless. That is the word that comes to mind. Honestly, it is less annoying to me than Back from the Brink because it does not have the cutesy cartoon “comedy” that makes me want to spork my eyeballs or a story that I could see being actually good if done differently or a fanbase acting like it is better than it is. This is a bit of cheap fluff and it knows it’s a bit of cheap fluff and lack of pretention is refreshing.

9. ML’s English name is “Fiction.” I am just gonna throw it out there.

[huntersapprentice]

GROWLS

hi, so uhm, yeah, here’s the VeggieTales episode tier list I said I would do

putting my thoughts under the read more if y’all wanna read that

So like I did with my Silly Song tier list, I’m going to go in order of bottom to top. I’ll try to be a little more organized about it this time.

Yellow-green is, as the image says, just episodes I haven’t seen in full or at all. I will say though, I want to see The League of Incredible Vegetables really badly. Also Celery Night Fever. I’ve heard that episodes pretty good.

NOW! Let’s go on to what I have seen.

YELLOW:

So these are the episodes that I went like “Oh these were okay... whatever” and then barely ever touched them again. Yes, the second movie’s on there, and I saw it once. It was alright, I liked bits of it, but it didn't stick with me enough. That’s also how I feel about Merry Larry a bit. I gladly took the Bob and Mr. Lunt dynamic in this episode, but I wouldn’t go back and see the entire thing again just for it.

With Moe and the Big Exit, it was just kinda iffy to me. Fine on first watch, but I don’t entirely feel like revisiting it again. Duke and the Great Pie War just didn’t grip me all that much, but the part where Otis gets shot from a slingshot was really funny.

Fennel Frontier and Big River Rescue I did watch more than once, but then not much. Mr. Spork(Bob’s character in Fennel Frontier) gulping down an entire half of a sandwich like it was nothing was kinda the highlight for me. I think out of the rest of the group, I revisit Gideon: Tuba Warrior a bit more, but not by all that much.

YELLOW ORANGE:

OKAY, the more or less general enjoyment category! Some of them I don’t revisit all that often, but I like them more and am more willing to go back and watch them again. So I only just watched It’s a Meaning Life, and this was only a day after watching the original It’s a Wonderful Life, so maybe I’m biased in the way that this episode was an immediate pallet cleanser from that. It was a pretty cute episode, plus it introduced sexyman Larry.

I haven’t revisited the End of Silliness? as a full, but everything about the ending scene just stuck with me since the first time I saw it. I liked Penniless Princess a bit more than I expected to, which was also the same deal with Pistachio; which I extra appreciate for having Bob go from not really understanding the Countertop redesign until he sees Qwerty and starts crying. I felt that.

Sheerluck Holmes was fun, especially the “Call On Us“ reprise. I love that part. Dave and the Giant Pickle I don’t revisit often, but again, a single musical number in it is what grips me the most in it: I really fucking love “Big Things, Too.“ The Little House That Stood honestly got this placement just because of Good Egg of Gooseville. (assuming that’s what the segment’s called) Whole episode is alright, but Bob is Humpty Dumpty, who’s literally cracking from work stress. Plus, he and Junior(as Baby Bear) hug near the end of the segment and it’s really sweet. Also, it reminded me of the Hello Kitty Furry Tale Theater episode of Mother Goose, so that’s really cool.

I like Josh and the Big Wall. It’s really cool, but I don’t watch it often. It’s a very once-in-a-while episode that I’d need to have some overwhelming reason to watch. I’m not super attached to Lyle the Kindly Viking, but I like it. It’s cute to watch Archibald try real hard to make a fancy and sophisticated episode. They do both a Hamlet spoof about the last eggs in the kingdom and a story about vikings in the style of Gilbert and Sullivan. It’s just a fun episode.

Speaking of fun, here’s a fun fact: Jonah: A VeggieTales Movie was the first home media thing I owned of VT. I saw it in bits before on youtube, but yeah. Jonah’s cool. I like that the ending of the movie itself is just the gang going “The main character didn’t learn anything! What kinda story is that?“ and then Mr. Lunt has to go and tell them “The point is that you learned from the fact that he didn’t learn, dumbass. Learn media literacy“ and then they have one last big musical number for the fuck of it. Oh yeah, and there’s also a celebrity guest song for the credits which oddly enough gives me a lot of nostalgia for the credits of the first Spongebob movie. Actually this whole movie always kinda reminds me of Spongebob Squarepants Movie for really no reason other than there’s nonhumans going somewhere at the behest of a higher figure and there’s the ocean at some point. They’re both the first movies of their respective series. Oh yeah, and the characters being snagged away and almost getting killed once they get to said destination. Cool stuff.

LarryBoy and the Bad Apple has the Bad Apple. Oh yeah, Bob also stomps on the ground in a fit of annoyance and then stands there in shame for the next minute while Larry and Archibald talk about the lesson, which has to be up there in the top most huntercore things he’s ever done. I enjoy watching Esther: The Girl Who Became Queen from time to time. It’s definitely different from the usual VT style, aside from this episode being the first time that a unique character was created to be main character for the episode (out of Penniless Princess, Saint Nick, and Beauty and the Beet, as some examples). I think it’s a nice change of tone, especially since The Rumor Weed was kind of the same way.

The Toy that Saved Christmas is also another once in a while watch. Mr. Nezzer is up to some business schemes again by basically selling weaponry to children. A toy with a buzz-saw. I’m assuming it’s meant to be commentary on the thing of “violent toys” being sold to children, but in a vacuum, it’s funny that Mr. Nezzer’s just selling buzz-saws in dolls just to make the toy look cool and no one calls him out on this aspect at all. “I can excuse a safety hazard, but I draw the line at promoting rampant consumerism”. This episode is also just fun, especially seeing it tailored with the VT Christmas Spectacular bit. Mr. Nezzer also tries to kill Bob, Junior, and Larry indirectly again for being meddling kids.

Finally, here’s Where’s God When I’m Scared, first episode of the show. It’s good. I’m partial to “Tales of the Crisper,“ but I also enjoy the Daniel retelling. Favorite thing in it though has to be the “God is Bigger than the Bogeyman“ number, if mainly for the first half of the first half of the song. Yes, mainly because of Bob. Small factoid, because my first proper exposure to this series was through “x being that and so for y minutes” compilations on youtube, the “what are you gonna do?“ clip has been burned into my subconscious, so I’m a bit more attached to the number because of that.

ORANGE:

King George and the Ducky is good. Being the episode after the Rumor Weed and Esther, it’s back to the good ol’ countertop in this one. So Larry’s the king, The World is His, and he really wants a kid’s rubber duck. To get it from him, he sends him to the Pie War, hoping it maybe gets rid of him so that he can have the duck to himself. Oh yeah, Jimmy and Jerry are hosts... for like eight minutes before Bob tells them off for being bad at it. This and Madame Blueberry are episodes I’ll just put on casually to have in the background.

Madame Blueberry is also pretty good for being in my radius of “episodes I’m a little more partial to". I did go and seek out Madame Bovary at my college’s library because of it, just to see how much (aside from time setting) they changed from the book. The answer is a lot. So yeah, it’s a good episode to just lounge through. Now for A Snoodle’s Tale. So this the first episode animated by a different animation group. Having thought on it for a bit now, I think DKP’s model style for VeggieTales is just really cute, especially B-- Also, I just love the Snoodle creatures.

The Ballad of Little Joe has the jailhouse reprise of “Oh Little Joe“ and “Belly Button“, so that automatically puts it high on the tier list. And the countertop banter. Always love the countertop banter. Larry’s “a WESTERN, BAHB“ and Bob’s “yahoo“ have to be up there on a list of favorite things the VT characters have ever uttered. LARRYBOY AND THE RUMOR WEED is really great and cool. “I’m the Rumor Weed“ is one of my favorite songs from the series. I don’t watch it often, but when I do, I remember that they literally let Larry get the shit beaten out of him. OH I ALMOST FORGOT TO MENTION THIS. Larry being so legitimately relieved to see that he didn’t die from plummeting into the ground, and fucking Alfred just goes “Yes, isn’t it lovely? :3“ Also on the top tier for one of my favorite interactions in this show.

Finally, it’s Are You My Neighbor? time. So I’m kinda in a similar place with this one like I am with Where’s God When I’m Scared, as in I’m way more partial to the original story content than I am in the bible retelling bit. I do like the parable bit, but I just like the story of Junior getting whisked away by two spacemen (Bob and Larry) so he can help them save an entire ship of people from a meteor made of popcorn a lot more. So this is Jimmy and Jerry’s introduction episode, and in the end, they end up saving the day because Junior figures their hungry asses could probably eat the incoming meteor. They did. They dance and have a musical number, and that’s how Junior learns that you shouldn’t be dismissive of someone just because they’re different than you. The set-up of the episode was that Junior didn’t feel like inviting a kid to his birthday party. Just thought I should mention that.

RED:

LET’S GO, RED ZONE!

So starting off the “episodes that drive Hunter nuts” category, here’s God Wants Me to Forgive Them!?! I know people rag on this episode for... everything about the visuals, but being entirely honest; the weird animation is kinda why I like this episode so much. Aside from that, this episode is just so different from the entire catalogue in a way I can’t really put my finger on. This episode doesn’t even have a Silly Song in it. Not even as a creative choice like how the LarryBoy episodes don’t have them(aside from League of Incredible Vegetables), but because the creators didn’t think anyone actually expected more after the first one. So the feeling could be chalked up to “duh, this is the second episode after all, so they were kinda experimenting with this one.“

There are so many face close-ups in this one, and I mean A LOT. Pa gets up in the audience’s face twice while addressing an entirely different person... for dramatic effect I guess. Bob gets up in the audience’s to ask a fucking math question. Junior’s dad has one. Junior has three close-up shots; again, dramatic effect I think. Scallion 1 has one during his attempt to scam people. In the Gilligan’s Island spoof, Bob and Larry get one as they scream in terror because their boat is about to crash into a fucking rock. Bob then has another on for dramatic effect. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that the first story is based on The Grapes of Wrath, by which I mean only based on the title, because I’m pretty sure the book isn’t about two old people and their two kids bullying a random five year old for no reason other than they don’t know its a bad thing to do that until said five year old’s dad intervenes and tells them to stop.

Then there’s the Gilligan’s Island spoof where Larry accidentally crashes the boat that he and Bob were just navigating out to who knows where with Archibald, Lovey(Archibald’s wife), and Junior’s dad. He daydreams about saving whales, but then the boat crashes into the rock, and everyone’s mad at Larry for it. Bob tells him off in the moment while they’re in their hammocks. Larry takes this as Bob and the others not liking him anymore and that they’d be better off without him, so he flees during the night. The day after, everyone else realizes that they shouldn’t have reacted that way to Larry and then seek him out to apologize to him. They do that and then they reconcile. A palm tree comes out and sings about forgiveness. Junior’s dad comes out with an entire helicopter made of bamboo, and the gang all make it back home. Long story short, I think God Wants Me to Forgive Them is pretty cool.

I’ll try to be a little more concise with this next one, but I’m not making any promises when I get to The Star of Christmas. I really like Larryboy and the Fib from Outer Space. The first LarryBoy episode and it’s about Junior lying about breaking his dad’s plate because a little alien freak creature encouraged him to. Larry almost gets eaten in this one, by the alien freak creature, who grew really big because of Junior’s fibbing. The scene where Alfred is trying to solve who can stop is also another scene that’s been etched into my mind.

*cracks my knuckles*

Okay, it’s British time. So starting off with An Easter Carol; It’s an alright episode, plot-wise. It’s a Christmas Carol, but about Easter, and the main conflict centers around our Ebenezer Scrooge, played by Mr. Nezzer, who wants to build an Easter theme park over the local church because he wants to appease his grandma’s wish about the true meaning of Easter. It also has a heist B-plot where the two motherfuckers from the prior installment of this British AU try to steal the plans for the theme park so that Ebenezer doesn’t tear down the church. There’s a super long monologue song about his plans, a super short one about his grandma(as a vision) chewing him out for completely misunderstanding what she meant, then another normal-sized one where an angel sings about Jesus and his resurrection. There’s also a big explosion climax near the end. It rains plastic eggs from said explosion.

I think this sits in the same camp as GWMTFT where I don’t really mind the story much as I’m just paying attention to literally everything else. Oh yeah, this was the last episode done in-house by Big Idea’s animation department. I know what you might be asking: if I’m not that into the story, why is it ranked so high? BECAUSE ITS LIKE GWMTFT IN THE WAY THAT EVERYTHING ELSE IS CHAOS. Animation-wise and visually, this episode looks really good, but I love the expression work in this episode. I love that the heist subplot is even a thing because it’s probably the most seemingly unnecessary thing to have added to this Easter version of A Christmas Carol, except its not (to me). There’s no reason there needed to be a factory explosion, except to add salt on the wound to the consequences of Ebenezer’s actions, I suppose. But I’m so glad the factory explosion exists anyway. Also I just really love the semi-song the grandma does to chew out Ebenezer. I really enjoy high energy music. Also Cavis(Bob) says “y...your eggs“ as it’s raining eggs and it’s inexplicably the funniest thing in the movie to me. Love this episode.

But there’s one I love more.

THAT’S RIGHT FUCKERS, STAR OF CHRISTMAS TIME!!!!!!!! So I don’t know how obvious it is that Cavis Appythart is my favorite character Bob has done ever. He literally steals from an artifact from the local church and tries to lie to the face of his show partner that its not stealing. Then he’s accidentally complicit in burning down the theatre that Ebenezer Nezzer let him and Millward(Larry) use to put on the Mario play. Oh yeah, this is meant to be a Gilbert and Sullivan spoof too. So Cavis really really wants to make a play that will “teach London to love” because the city is a mess. Millward just goes along with it because yeah. Pa’s character, Seymour, is contracted to just stick light-bulbs all over the place. He also has a sick rocket car. I should mention that the general British AU story is set in the late 19th century. Cavis tries to get the Prince of England to come to the show but he doesn’t want to after learning that the church is presenting an artifact he’s really interested in, which was kind Cavis’s fault for revealing to Archibald’s character, a journalist. So then after getting refused, he gets the bright idea to go steal the artifact to put it in his show. This leads to wacky hijinks, arson, and then Cavis and Millward are arrested.

They meet an old guy in jail who chews Cavis out for trying to spectacle London into not being so mean anymore. Through this, he ends up realizing that love is about what you do for others and so on. The the two are then let out by the Reverend and his son, but they sacrificed the Christmas pageant in order to do it because... they walked the whole way over. All is not lost though, because Seymour shows up in his sick car and then lends it to Millward so they get rocketed all the way to the church. They do the pageant and everything’s la-di-da from there, except for Ebenezer finding out about the church and making Millward and Cavis work in the egg factory to pay off the debt (SET UP!!!). Anyhways, they thought the stole the star artifact at first, but it turns out they stole an entirely different thing, so now everything’s la-di-da. But then Cavis remembers the guy in jail who set him straight, and decides to go give him some cookies and a hot liquid I couldn’t identify. The episode then ends. So yeah, there’s a reason why I call this the sister episode to King George and the Ducky. Guys who acted selfishly in some way or another get told off by an old man for what they did, and then commit an act of giving to make up to it to the person they wronged. It’s Bob and Larry’s trans wrongs episodes, if I may put it that way. The trans part has nothing to do with anything, I just like putting it that way.

So my Bob bias plays big part in why I’m so attached to this episode. I think he should get to be a piece of shit at the risk of falling hard on his face due to his own folly more often, which I guess happens in the VTShow more often but whatever. Also, I love the background music of this episode and I wish that there was a way I could just have it on its own. The only place it really plays is in the credits and the menu screens. The background music in VT in general is so good sometimes. Uhm. Yeah. Cavis Appythart babygirl moments. I like this episode.

WOOW. That’s the end of it. Congrats for making it down here! Here’s a cookie 🍪 And thanks for reading this

[fennopunk]

I signed a contract today, and will start rehabilitative work activity next month, in a handcraft workshop :D Basically the municipality will pay me for going to do fun handcrafts couple times a week for few hours a day. And I mostly get to decide what I will do, as long as there's materials for it at the workshop.

The councelor was stoked when I showed her pictures of some stuff I have made, especially the recent woodcarvings and the theater costumes (she very much agreed with me that the spork is cute af), and encouraged me to finally make a portfolio so that she can go through it when I start there

The drawback is that I may not be allowed to wear my headphones during the work day for "safety reasons", but the councelor promised to see if they can make an exception for me since I wear them for sensory sensitivity reason, especially because they have done so once before me. So, fingers crossed, but I'm not above pointing out it's discrimination if they try to forbid my headphones (also I've noticed listing EVERY sound I register at the moment is effective on pointing out to people why I need headphones, so I may do that too)

[butterscotch-brigade]

when i was like 11-12 years old i used to love content where ppl would read and make fun of "bad" fanfics in the style of mystery science theater or whatever (a practice commonly known as "MST3King/MSTing" or "sporking") and one time i saw some ppl MSTing a gay pinky and the brain mpreg fanfiction and at one point during the fic brain calls pinky "my dear" and i disntinctly remember one of the commentators being like "you know, i have nothing against gay couples and i support gay marriage, but i think calling each other things like 'my dear' is a bit too much" and im somehow just NOW realizing how fucked up that whole entire mess of an ordeal was

[what-the-fang]

Important DRAWN INTO THE SHADOWS Update (and some other housekeeping stuff)

Hey there, everyone! Apologies for the unexpected hiatus this past month; I was quite busy with the community theater show I was in and also just recently got back from a mini-vacation visiting family in Baltimore, so I haven’t really had much time or energy for blogging for a while. I do plan on updating both my Fifty Shades and Angels & Demons sporkings very soon, but before that I wanted to…

[saint-starflicker]

I started out with fanfiction in the Buffy the Vampire Slayer fandom twenty years ago. The "Big Name Fans" in transformative works were English teachers by profession and I think just so happened to want to combine their hobby with their vocation: They wrote essays about proper dialogue punctuation, characterization and relationship dynamics, how not to get confused by easily confused words (there, their, they're), and even—because the source material we were all writing fanfiction for had a lot of fight scenes—how to write a fight scene in prose.

That said, it was also emerging from a pan-fandom online culture of fanfiction criticism that...maybe had too much fun with being mean. The "Plot Protectors" and the "Fic Bitches" would trawl the hosting websites for whole fanfictions to re-post with "commentary" that is a line-by-line evisceration that was often brutally insulting to the author and a lot of us thought that was funny and educational. (One blog clique called it Sporking.) (The Plot Protectors had a whole parallel universe worldbuilding that was unfortunately very entertaining and fascinating in its own right.)

I think that a lot of young writers back then were very discouraged by that atmosphere and found it toxic.

I'm guessing that's partly how we got to where we are now, where I find a lot of outcry against complaining or criticizing anything written for free or for fun—which, well, fair points.

I think that's too far in the other extreme, though. I wouldn't want to be "heckled from the other side of the campfire" so to speak by just any self-righteous jerk on the internet—but I do also think that any text, especially any trends within a form or a genre, can be analyzed.

At the same time, I completely understand that a lot of inexperienced or hobbyist writers aren't here for getting heckled by self-righteous jerks who time-travelled from 2002 when it was really cool to be mean and to cover that up with "we're helping you to write better". There's always going to be people who offer inapplicable suggestions based on nothing but their personal biases, or who really think they're in the right when it's only their unresolved personal issues they're making somebody else's problem, and people who criticize the criticism (like the "Fanfiction University" that taught as I said mostly grammar and punctuation, would get nasty anonymous comments sent to its members that wrapped up with basically "you have the gall to tell other people how to write"). Even the compliment sandwich that was recommended back in the day as a format for feedback (e.g., "love the premise, characterization could have been less flat, this was my favorite line"), I remember that got some sarcastic comments from both readers who only wanted to get to be mean and writers whose egos could only bear to receive unconditional positivity. And there's going to be actually meaningful criticism. And no way to tell that last type from all the preceding types.

I don't really have a solution, then. I'm just happy that I was at the right place at the right moment to get what was helpful to my craft from that. Even though I benefitted from the content at the time, I wouldn't recommend a revival of Fanfiction Universities or Fanfiction Sporking Blogs, because I can predict problems arising from those too.

So right now I think of the fanficsphere like the quality/quantity pottery story, or comparable to why community theater is usually going to be bad but also nothing is more important to the art than to keep that space alive for people to be amateurs and unskilled and to try new things in.

After months of staying silent on literary discourse here on Tumblr, I finally have something to contribute.

Fanfiction is not the problem. Fanfic is a free, communal and valid form of writing which, although not always high quality, has yielded some genuinely great stories. The real problem, the reason for ‘booktok books’ and the flaws in modern literature, is fanfic being hijacked by corporations. The minute people try to make money off of it, the minute fanfic and fanfic-style stories lose their meaning. Fanfiction is written on the notes app at 3am for you and 5 friends who share your taste. It is self-indulgent, chaotic, often told through a queer and/or neurodivergent lens, and free from any pressure to be commercially palatable. The minute a few stereotypical fanfiction tropes and ideas are stolen by commercial publishers and twisted into patriarchal, heteronormative versions of themselves with no character depth beyond the romance (a problem that for obvious reasons doesn’t apply to fanfic), that is where the real problem begins.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk

[nicole-gasbarro]

An Interview with Karisma Garcia

Karisma Garcia: vocalist, actress, model, and Rutgers student has joined me today for an interview! Karisma is a current freshman at Rutgers University majoring in Speech Pathology. Her career and life plans include becoming a speech pathologist and potential actress. I have asked her some questions about her musical experience on campus as well as throughout her life. Karisma is Colombian and Filipina and hails from Jersey City, New Jersey. These details will be central to our conversation and I hope you will enjoy hearing her perspective.

The Interview

Nicole: "What does your previous musical experience look like? I would love to know how your roots in musical performance began."

Karisma: "I have acted as Cinderella as in my high school's production of Cinderella, my freshman year I played Kate in Legally Blonde, I was the understudy for Jasmine in 8th grade for Artist's Avenue's production of Aladdin, and my first ever named character I played was Eponine in Les Miserables when I was ten years old."

Nicole: "Awesome! So clearly you have a lot of prior experience in musical theater. It's really great that you were able to have some experience in different roles and hone your skills in acting and performing. What musical activities are you involved in now at Rutgers?"

Karisma: "Right now, I am a part of both the Orphan Sporks acapella group and the University Choir on campus."

Nicole: " That's so cool! As a fellow Orphan Sporks member, I can safely say my experience in the group has been amazing. What has your experience been like in these musical groups thus far and are you enjoying them?"

Karisma: "I love it! I have had the opportunity to meet amazing new people with my best friend so big shoutout to you."

Nicole: "Aw, thank you! I agree and I think that being involved with musical groups at Rutgers definitely allows you to connect with other talented musicians and learn from as well as have fun with them. Now, how do you feel music has impacted your life from when you were a kid to present day? I'm curious to know how this became such an important passion for you."

Karisma: "Growing up, there was this sort of juxtaposition that went on with the musicality I was exposed to in my family. On one hand, there was my mom who is always off-key and can't sing. And then there's my grandma who sings very well and she always sang while she cooked. My grandma also introduced me to the Mammia Mia! soundtrack which I now listen to at least every month for a good serotonin boost."

Nicole: "That's really interesting how you had sort of a range of musical skill in your family. I feel like mine is similar in that my mom also can't sing (sorry mom) but my dad was the lead singer of his band in high school and almost pursued a career in music as an adult. Mammia Mia! is such an iconic musical and film and the soundtrack is similarly a nostalgic and joyful listen for me. Pertaining to your background in singing, how old were you when you started singing and what inspired you to do so?"

Karisma: "I was 3 or 5 and the comfort movie was Mamma Mia! at my lola's! Both her and my mom would sing plus singing and karaoke is a significant part of Filipino culture. So they encouraged me to sing. Then a couple years later, I really fell in love with Alicia Key's music and I wanted to sing like her so I sang "Girl On Fire" like a million times until I could hit all the notes. Same with Lea Salonga as Eponine with "On my Own" from Les Miserables.

Nicole: "I love Alicia Keys and I think it is a shared goal by many vocalists to be able to sing like her. That is really wonderful that your culture and family encouraged your interest in singing! I have heard from many of my Filipino friends about the importance of karaoke, singing, and music in their culture and just recently had a blast doing karaoke at a RAPS (Rutgers Association of Philippine Students) event on campus. Can you expand on how your culture both as a Filipina and Latina woman has bolstered or encouraged your musical skills and interest?"

Karisma: "I think both sides of my family encouraged me to pursue whatever I set my mind to and instilled this incredible sense of passion and work ethic! I think a big part of Filipino culture is just having a certain appreciation for music and carrying yourself with a sense of pride and confidence. And that applies to Latinx culture too. That value just presents itself as karaoke with my Filipino family plus when my family found out I could carry a tune they just requested that me and my sister sing at every single family event, no matter what side of the family."

Nicole: "That's amazing that your family instilled such vital qualities and mindsets in you for success and which grew your passion for doing what you love! I just wanted to say, I'm really proud of you for how far you have come in your musical and life endeavors. I know you will continue to thrive in your future and accomplish incredible things, thank you so much for joining me today!"

Karisma: "Of course! And thank you so much, I greatly appreciate your support as one of my best friends and thank you for taking this journey with me. You're a real one."

Karisma's involvement in music in both her high school and college career are reflective of her immense talent, work ethic, and dedication to music and the arts. I am eager to see what she will take on next and I view her as a great inspiration to not only myself but other young female artists. Her experience as a gen z woman of color has uniquely impacted her experience in the music field and has strengthened her motivation and love for what she does. I am always happy to highlight successful women in music and I am very grateful to Karisma for sharing part of her story.

[rubiaryutheroyal]

I finally got around to setting up a Patreon

I would have gone into this post a lot earlier with all the energy I could bring, but after the Nintendo Direct, I haven't been able to stop wheezing at the new Mario Bros movie cast. I'm DEPLETED.

Anyway, since someone brought it to my attention in an old tumblr ask, I've been stewing for the past several months over how to set up a Patreon page, how much I should even ask for, and what I should deliver. For the longest time, I was actually against it because I always saw my translation work as a volunteer job and I didn't need the money. But eventually my family situation changed and I've been under lots of pressure to find a job over the past year, to little result.

So I finally caved and did something. Here ya go:

https://www.patreon.com/rubia_ryu

With this set up, I'm finally taking this blog work seriously and will stop running into hiatuses if I can help it. (This goes for my big project on the main blog too, but that's a separate schedule.) I think I've kept the subscription costs reasonably low. I'm not trying to stop global warming here or anything, ha. I ultimately decided to feature two main things:

1. Any major or bulk translation requests, like for at least 5 whole pages of text or more than 15 minutes of video, basically stuff that could take me anywhere from half an hour to several hours to comb through for details, I will redirect you to this page. Depending on your bargaining skills, however, I may let you off and work it for free or whatever you feel comfortable paying. Just DM me.

2. I'm reviving the Sporking Theater, at least my take on it! I'll add in a separate FF7 expansion pack too for the lulz; maybe for other franchises too, but they're still pending. Send me your fic requests. It can be any age rating. I marked my page as "includes adult content" just in case.

If you don't know what that is, Court-Records Forums was a hubbub back in the day for all Ace Attorney news and chat, and one of the best threads on that site was the Sporking Theater, where friends and I would roleplay as various characters (the sporkers) and poke fun at awful fanfiction, all with the authors' permission. Think Mystery Science Theater 3000 (if you're old enough to know that) or Cinema Sins on Youtube. Rest assured I will always make sure the author has given consent. I will screenshot and frame it if I have to.

Also, to be clear, any quick translation requests like asking me about something or if you need clarifying on something you found, you can just ask me as usual. No donations necessary.

-

Reblog this post or I'll be a sad pupper. This has been Rubia Ryu the Royal Pomeranian.

[keynoma]

SHOCK VALUE

CHAPTER 1

Here is the moment that you are all waiting for... What will going to happen?

A plot hole?

An OOC?

A random sex scene?

Would it be indeed a story where narrative value is just a suggestion?

Let’s introduce the sporkers for this grand sporking session, a so-called grand reopening and reunion for the sporking:

THE ONE WITH A PHILOSOPHY OF MORALITY - PHOENIX WRIGHT

THE ONE WITH A PHILOSOPHY OF OPTIMISM - MAYA FEY

THE ONE WITH A PHILOSOPHY OF LOGICALITY - MILES EDGEWORTH

THE ONE WITH A PHILOSOPHY OF PERFECTION - FRANZISKA VON KARMA

Management: Sporkers!

(The door was opened to reveal a grand, new, state-of-the-art theater. It was fitted with multiple air conditions and various colored lighting. Also, the theater seat was replaced with comfy movie theater beds. At the side of the cinema room was a buffet for the four.)

Maya: OH MY! FREE FOOD FOR THE NIGHT!

(Maya runs toward the buffet table)

Phoenix: Ah, finally. My wallet can rest in peace.

Edgeworth: However, our dignity? Not even a spare.

Phoenix: Come on, Mr. Edgeworth. Never be the edgy worth of pessimism in just a single dose of day.

*WHIPS*

Phoenix: YOOOOWWWCCHHH!

Edgeworth: Ah, Franziska! I hope you’re still well after the rumor of the so-called re-opening of the Sporking theater has been actualized after all.

Franziska: Better be, Miles Edgeworth! Is this some kind of joke that the Management offers us an improved theater with cohesive watching experience but in exchange for reading fiction, who represents us, having our value and worth being sullied?

Management: Ah, come on. It’s not like that. I know it’s going to be bad but in order not to consider it as complete overkill, I have to purchase a grand cinema house with the finest buffet. *WHIPS*

Management: Ok, ok, fine. I admit it’s bad. I just need help to comprehend this fic I’m reading. So, please, enjoy yourself a buffet.

Maya: Come on! Have a heart at least. Earn it as your rest day from your exhaustive work of being a prosecutor

Franziska: How does it help you? You know what will happen soon if you agree. Maya: You know, we have survived every bad fanfiction, So, knowing our experiences, is there anything that we never survived sporking on?

Edgeworth: (sigh) Franziska: Argh, for the love of your puppy eyes. Your call, Mr. Edgeworth. Edgeworth: …Mr. Wright?

Phoenix: Well, we wouldn’t want to waste the Management’s effort. So, it’s likely we are going to concede this. Again, it’s been more than ten years as sporkers, it should be a child’s play, at least.

*WHIP*

Phoenix: OWOWOWOW

*WHIP*

Maya: OWWWOWOWO

Franziska: Then, you made the right choice about the Management.

Management: …It is really the spirit of being a sporker. It is a fighter in becoming. By the way, you can ask me if you need any help.

Phoenix: Hmm, no psyche-lock since the beginning. I saw his statements are genuine but I don’t like the part where the Management admits the fic is bad.

Edgeworth: With or without psycho-lock, I already feel bad, Mr. Wright.

(The gang grabs the plate and gets the food from the table. Maya grabs all the pizza and hamburgers, Phoenix grabs the chicken sandwiches, Edgeworth gets the honey garlic salmon steak with the tea, and Franziska gets the salad skewer and truffle-flavored steak.)

(The gang occupies the theatre beds, which has installed food holder/table)

Management: Ok, let's get started.

(The light turns off, then the cinema screen fades in)

--

teh rasist ternabot this is realy ofensiv so u shoulnt red it if u are esily ofended

Maya: Uhh…

Franziska: Never knew that misspellings, missing punctuation and capitalization, grammar mistakes would appear in the same sentence. It’s not that I'm offended but it was the second beautiful language named English that would be offended for that.

Edgeworth: And maybe put the effort in the title and summary. That’s the first thing that the reader saw. Otherwise, you mess it up before everything gets started.

Phoenix: Maybe, people would misinterpret it as one of the other troll fics, not something that people would get comforted reading.

teh weed warz

WHIP*

Franziska: NEEDS!

*WHIP*

Franziska: PERFECT!

*WHIP*

Franziska: SPELLING!

Phoenix: So, we’re dealing with illegal drugs.

Maya: What is so ironic is that the Great Ace Attorney had an anti-drug campaign.

Management: The Management has highly encouraged Ms. Fey to not break the fourth screen.

Miles: That is not why I really fear it. It’s the “warz” I’m fearing.

teh beginin

Franziska: Honestly, that and the title has not even a single correct spelling on its word.

Phoenix: Wait. I think about it. Where is the...

Franziska: You mean anything with perfect spelling and grammar?

Phoenix: No, no, I mean the-

Franziska: A creative name rather than naming "the beginning" as the introduction to the narrative.

Phoenix: No, no, it's the-

Franziska: Zero, zip, zich, nada.

Phoenix: Argh!

Edgeworth: Now, I’m thinking. Since this story is titled, “the racist turnabout”, what made that become racist?

it elll begen wehn egdewrth lost his persocutors badge like sum time ago.

Edgeworth: I get it. Commonly a discrimination towards the character’s role and dignity and the art and beauty of English language.

*WHIPS*

Edgeworth: NGGGHHHH!

Franziska: How dare you? Not only you betrayed the name of von Karma but the name of the law. It’s an abomination to law, order, and justice locally and internationally. Now, explain yourself.

Edgeworth: Uhh…

he wux kot masterb8ting and wuz kalled gay and shit.

*WHIPS*

Edgeworth: No, the “Edgeworth” you should be asking is in the cinema monitor.

Phoenix: Now, we’re going from illegal drugs to public lewdness. What an inconvenient topic-changing!

Maya: (munches on hamburgers)

teh judg sad edgeworth u are gay andf 420 blazin butt you ckant fap in kourt. edgewoirthy said shit thos is fuking gay man i kkkan go 4 some weed.

Franziska: Although there are many grammar errors, at least the author gets Edgeworth’s name, also the longest name. But no, the capitalization here is missing.

Phoenix: I doubt that the judge would say much informal in court.

Maya: Woah, that’s a life-changer for Mr. Edgeworth but backward.

Edgeworth: Fine, fine, it’s not like I’m doing any illegalities especially since I’m a prosecutor.

Franziska: Better be, Miles Edgeworth!

soo egdewort start a lef of krime

Maya: Wow, too backward so much like we’re traveling back to the dinosaurs.

*WHIPS*

Edgeworth: NGGGGHHHH!

he raped liek inocent litel girlz and smokd wed everydy.

Franziska: It seems to me that we are reading another language, also known as, something that I don’t understand.

*WHIP*

Maya: That is way too backwards.

(silence)

Maya: Please, tell me, you’re not going into “Phoenix Drive” mode, are you?

Edgeworth: Nonsense, Ms. Fey. The only one doing this is the one who falsely mimics me, obviously, the one whom we are sporking to.

Maya: Mmhmm. Ok, that would be.

Management: Phoenix Drive? You know, before I knew it was a game but soon it was sporked, I thought it was an application that stores Phoenix Wright game files in the cloud internet.

Edgeworth: GAH! Please don’t give any programmer a good idea or any author a good title.

teh he started h8ting jews an joind teh KKK

Franziska: I realized that the maximum number of letters in a word that the author has correctly spelled except for the character’s name has finally reached seven.

Edgeworth: Franziska, this is not the way you should be optimistic.

Maya: Well, I don’t know how Nick, Ms. von Karma, and I equate into this story?

Phoenix: Maybe, later. This chapter focuses on Mr. Edgeworth solely, so let’s relax a bit.

(Phoenix drinks water)

meenwhiel pheenixkcz and moysa were having sex

Phoenix: PFFFFFFTTTTT! (cough)...(cough)

Maya: WHAT IN THE WORLD?

(Phoenix covers Maya’s eyes)

Franziska: That’s rather sooner than later.

Edgeworth: I guess this truly answered your question.

(Edgeworth sips the tea)

egde worth caut tehm butt tehn raped maya kuz he kan

Edgeworth: PFFFFFTTTTT! (cough)...(cough)

Maya: (covering her eyes) Why should I accept into this?

Franziska: Argh! Look what you’ve done with the perfect cleanliness of my clothes. And the perfectness of English grammar.

Phoenix: Alright, this is so early. It’s definitely not a good idea to introduce a character in that way, no less. This story only adds to its shock value, not the narrative value.

pheenicks said man i haet jew kuz thy are gay lol moay sid taht jews dont eat hamm, soo dey dint eat burgerz so thy are gay.

Maya: Huh? What with the not eating hamburgers because of religion purposes has something to do with being gay?

Franziska: PHOENIX WRIGHT!

*WHIPS*

Phoenix: ARGH OWOWOWW!

Franziska: You better not insult everyone in the world, especially this story insulted the second beautiful language.

Phoenix: Yes, yes, it’s not like I’m planning to.

egdewort dssaid then join teh kkk it is fun myua ad pxehecsicsjxccx siad ys.

Franziska: And joining the terrorist group is not a fun thing to do. If you have first thought about doing this, please tear up all of your bucket lists from now on.

Edgeworth: You know, although a bit clueless-

Phoenix and Maya: HEY!

Edgeworth: The two would not be convinced to join the so-called cult, especially using the only reason word “fun”.

Franziska: Also, I recommend the author to join any grammar classes if there is. Make it your bucket list from now on.

Edgeworth: Agree!

tehn gumshoo gawt joned in bexuc he wazu high

Franziska: Oh no, Mr. Detective Scruffy has joined the chat.

Edgeworth: Now, utilizing the reason word “high” reaches another level of abnormality.

and when pehcehckibeouickkkkk

Franziska: …

Maya: pehcehc-blah-huh? What does it suppose to mean?

Edgeworth: I would bet that the correct phrase would be “Phoenix, be our KKK, okay?”

Phoenix: Or maybe “Phoenix, be quick, KKK”?

(Maya, Edgeworth, and Phoenix glare at the Management)

Management: If you’re asking me for the true word, sorry, guys.

Franziska: If this becomes a word in the dictionary, we are now in the world of IQ level negative 200.

goawt in he brounght perl becuz she wuz liek 5 years old

Maya: Perl…Pearl..PEARLY?...PEARLY!

Phoenix: Oh no, we are on the Phoenix Drive after all.

Edgeworth: Let’s not jump to the conclusion. We only know that Pearl will be appearing sooner or later. (Edgeworth sips tea anxiously)

tehn tehy gawt an order frum aldof hitler!11!11!111!1 he siad to get rekr ad jwws. hitelr sad edgewrth u must steel teh wweed from predisent trumps offcis and sell it.

Phoenix: But now, this story gets too political. No comment for that because I don’t want anyone to have additional hate towards our game, especially since The Game Theorist.

Maya/Edgeworth: AGREE!

Management: …The Management…you know what?...You made yourself a point.

Franziska: (Now, the Management has lost for words.)

pheeenixk sad wow that seems legit moys said weed sound fun 2 smmoke edgewort siad i hate jwes and blaks

Maya: No, no. A canon-me would not get addicted to something so illegal.

Edgeworth: A canon-me would not hate Jews and Blacks.

Phoenix: A canon-me would not say this story is legitimate.

Franziska: Therefore, a canon-me would have every INTERPOL material to hunt this spawn fic, especially how bad the spelling was misplaced.

hitelr said geet the fuking money u ficking shitheds or ill kell u all

Edgeworth: I just think about it. This story has its time being bizarrely warped. How come that 20th century dictator was alive at that point, especially at the time of the 46th US president in the 21st century?

Phoenix: Who knows? Anti-aging cream? Fountain of youth?

(Edgeworth and Maya glares at Phoenix)

Edgeworth: Well, considering this story’s nature of providing shark-jumping elements, I’m not going to deny your answer, Mr. Wright.

Franziska: It’s too random to include real-life people for the story, especially the two with questionable reputations. If so, how can you make sense of that? How does it help your story? Remember, anyone would hate these two. So, why bother? What is really the purpose?

(Phoenix was about to answer.)

Franziska: Again, don’t make me answer “cameo” because that already is a moot point here.

(Phoenix backs down)

Franziska: Nice choice.

so tehn tehy ell gawt in teh fuking van aend edgeworth lit up a blunt gumshoo wuz drivig, butt wiht hiz cockain addicktionnn, he migt get hihg.

Maya: We’re now in the adventure van. Here we go!

Phoenix: Now, Mr. Scruffy is totally now Mr. Snuffy

(Maya glares at Phoenix)

Franziska: Congratulations, fic-all, you earned “go to the jail and it would be easy for the police to catch you” certificate because driving under vice is still a violation and would be obviously noticeable.

maya siad hey nik waent 2 haev sex feehcksickzz siuad sure moya u kan bee on top tehy had a tun uv seckz in teh bak aend perl saw teh whoel ting

Phoenix: Argh! That is terrible for anyone to do something sickening in a moving van, no less.

Maya: No..NO! What decides this author to include sex? A random abstractive sleepy dream?

Franziska: Ms. Fey, if he is at the top, then your whole skeleton broke down.

Maya: Despite my structure, I am not a feeble woman, Prosecutor von Karma. I am strong, that’s all. (munches on a hamburger)

Franziska: (Gee, her metabolism is not something that I expected.)

Edgeworth: Honestly, this is so random sex scene that this story makes a shock value a prioritization while a narrative value a suggestion.

wehn pheenicks saw perl seeing teh seckz, he beat her reel good

Maya: NICK, YOU BETTER NOT TO HURT PEARLY OR I AM LITERALLY GOING TO CHANNEL YOU!

Phoenix: Yes, yes, Ma’am! (Argh! Why would anyone gag me good?)

tehn oheenicks wnet harder on maya

Franziska: Missing capitalization, punctuation, wrong grammar. This story gets messy…and whole dirty…depending on what you think.

Phoenix/Maya: …

Franziska: I SAID, “DEPENDING WHAT YOU THINK”!

*WHIP*

Phoenix: YEOWCHHHH!

Maya: OWWWHCCCCHCH!

whiel tehy gawt sexy in teh bakc, egde wort sad man im hungery but wait tehrs a mcdonald! gumshoo shwawtpd teh kkkar and maya said mcodnald? wehre i need a fiking burger

Maya: Really? In front of my juicy burger? Including burgers in this bad fanfiction would make it less delicious and appetizing on my tongue.

Phoenix: So, that means we have to go to the sporking theater everyday in order not to indulge yourselves with many burgers. That would help my wallet heal back.

Maya: Nick, I don’t believe in alternatives. Of course, we have to go to the burger houses every day. That’s the tradition of every victory court day.

Phoenix: (sigh) (At least, I’m not regretting having a hole in my wallet because of the six-stomach woman.) (munches a sandwich)

butt pheenicks and maya were compeltely naked so evryone satered at tehm

Maya: OH MY GOODNESS! OH MY GOODNESS! HOW IN THE WORLD?

Phoenix: CAN SOMEONE CHANGE THE SLIDE? THIS IS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HAPPENING!

Management: Oh, sorry, sorry. I never noticed that!

Edgeworth: (This is going to be a disaster for them.)

egfde dorth was behing a gay blak guy and gawt reel pissed at hmi soo he kild him wit a snipr rifel aend orderd teh bergerz butt it terns out taht tehy replacd teir letuc with weed leves!

Edgeworth: See what fic-me did to me? Never thought that the fic-me adds murder to his list of criminal charges.

Franziska: A second-degree murder charge? Noted.

Edgeworth: There is no need for you to emphasize, Franziska.

Maya: Wait, Mr. Edgeworth kills the guy before he gets the order. How come no one has seen or heard this? And how did he get the order?

Franziska: Uh-huh, how does McDonald's get a stack of weed leaves, especially if it's illegal? Why should they put in every meal? Now, I see not only the American court was sullied but the American food capitals and the language.

Phoenix: No comment because I would predict that everything would get bad to abysmal.

tehy all got high and were naked, soo tehy hadd seckz in frottn of evyone

Edgeworth: NGGGOOOOHHHHHHH!

Maya: AAAAAAHHHHHH! PLEASE, WHY WITH THAT?

Franziska: NGHHHH! The beautiful English…

Edgeworth: (Some priority she has.)

Phoenix: OH NO, NO. I’VE BEEN MR. RIGHT ALL ALONG. ARGH!

Maya: Nick, that’s the only time that your terrible joke can focus me away from this bad fanfic. And it’s a good thing.

Edgeworth: Is this author making Ace Attorney a Sausage Party? I see that this fiction made public lewdness a human’s legal right.

Management: …You know. Since this also gives me a visual anguish, all of your sporking faults would go unnoticed from now on.

Franziska: (Hmm, never thought the Management would get suffered as we are.)

tehy hadd 2 bee drageed out and bak 2 teh van and it wuz 4:20 o klok

Franziska: I just realized that it’s not even a night but afternoon, so probably more people would see you naked.

HOLD IT!

Maya: It may be 4:20 am, an early morning wherein no one is awake at the time.

OBJECTION!

Franziska: Well, how would you explain that the restaurant is still open in the early morning?

Maya: Uh...uh...NOOOOOOO!

Edgeworth: Please, girls, don’t make anything get worse.

gumshoo sad wee need 2 get 2 a hoetel 4 teh nite maya siad tahts a gud idea pheenicks said wait a hotel this is raelly gay gumshoo

Phoenix: Finally, I can still breathe now.

Franziska: And I’m not calmly breathing until this guy has constructed a complete sentence which is clean of grammatical errors.

Maya: Then, again, how does going into a hotel would make anyone gay?

Edgeworth: Another question remains unanswered. However, ignorance is bliss, you remember that.

Maya: Oh, thanks, Mr. Edgeworth! That feels me well.

Edgeworth: Heh! Just hoping that anything bad would never happen.

edge worth siad tehy have a bed soo i kan rape maya witout anyon knowing

Maya: MR. EDGEWORTH!

Edgeworth: Here goes my hope being shot down.

gumsoo said you fags are gay and WIAT! tehers weed in the bak! he turnd toward perl, who hadd no weed. but gumshoo wuz so desperet 4 weed he lickd her and even her genitalz

Franziska: WHAT IN THE WORLD AM I SEEING?

Edgeworth: IS THIS AUTHOR HAS ITS RIGHT MIND?

Phoenix: PLEASE NEVER REMIND ME THAT PEARL IS TEN IN THIS STORY!

Maya: PLEASE! NOT PEARLY! IT SHOULD BE ME THAT GUMSHOE IS…ARGH!

Edgeworth: If this one occurs, the most required action would be firing him rather than cutting the salary.

(Maya has about to say something)

Edgeworth: Literally…physically…with a gun.

Franziska: (Poor Detective.)

egde worth thot is waz sexy so he fapped 2 it tehn hiz kloths were staned white bai teh tiem tehy gawt 2 teh hoetl, they were kumpelety naked.

Maya: MR. EDDGGGEEEEWWWOOOORRRTTTHHH!! NOT YOU TOO!

Edgeworth: NO! I TAKE BACK THE “LITERAL FIRING” -

*WHIP*

Edgeworth: Nghhh!

Franziska: You deserve having your prosecutor’s badge revoked at the very beginning of this fic, right, Ms. Fey?

Maya: Yeah, yeah. REVOKED! That is.

*WHIP*

Edgeworth: Nggh! It’s not me.

Phoenix: (Please, tell me it's just mayonnaise from the leftover burger.)

Management: Never say “tell me” as if you never contradicted yourself. It’s just mayonnaise, duh, and don’t give my hopes down, Mr. Wright.

theitr room was standard, butt edgeworth said it awas gay because he was a muslim. edgeworth also siad maya did you have eny butrgers kuz i want to fuck you maya siad sure egdeworth and tehy had tonz uv seckz

Maya: Mr. Edgeworth, I have you know that I am not your sex toy.

Edgeworth: Argh! This is not something that I like.

Phoenix: Now, I wonder, where is that fic-me? I guess I’m finally spared of the whole humiliation.

Franziska: What an egological nature of a foolish defense attorney, I see.

Phoenix: I do say "wonder".

gumshoo and phjeeenicks were pervertd so

Phoenix: I guess not and yeah, considering this story’a nature, I would bet they would sex.

Maya: Please, not Pearly.

Franziska: Please, I need a perfect sentence.

Edgeworth: (Some priority everyone has.)

they pland to go 2 a strip klub

Maya: (relief)

Franziska: (frustration)

Phoenix: …That’s a different story. At least, I’m not watching any random sex scene.

Edgeworth: Mr. Wright, there is no “at-least” reassurances, you remember how many times this story gets so much twist, that has little to no sense.

Phoenix: Oh, that.

Edgeworth: And please don’t tell me you prefer going to a strip club, are you?

Maya: NICK, I NEVER KNOW YOU’RE SO PERVERT.

*WHIP*

Franziska: You’re now the model of true debauchee.

Phoenix: Please, it’s not like that.

butt perl kan be aloen gumshoo pheenicks siad. gum shoo siad i dont kare bitch just brink that bitch faggot. so tehy want 2 a strip klub and wasted all teir muney perl gawt skared 4 lief but feechninxks and gum soho didnt kkkare

Franziska: Ahh, another peaceful scene minus the three sins of offending English.

Edgeworth: And I would be willing enough to cut another salary not only for his incompetence but the carelessness of the kid.

Maya: And you don’t care Pearly, aren’t you, despite her considering you as a father?

Phoenix: I care Pearls so much that I would be willing to take her place in the story especially the “Gumshoe sex her” part.

Maya: Really, Nick?

Phoenix: Definitely.

Management: Hey, crime reconstruction would motivate you.

CRIME RECONSTRUCTION:he turnd toward phjeeenicks, who hadd no weed. but wuz so desperet 4 weed he lickd him and even his genitalz

Phoenix: Ok, ok, fine, fine. I’m willing. I’M WILLING! SPARE ME FROM YOUR VISUAL ANGUISH OF WHAT-IF!

Maya: Aww. Pearl is truly happy because of you, Nick.

Phoenix: (sigh) Thanks, Maya.

wehn tehy gawt bak it wux 4:20 am so tehy pertended 2 sleep.

Franziska: It’s indeed 4:20 pm last time.

(Maya glares at Franziska)

Franziska: Ok, fine, next slide!

egde worth and maya fall aslepp having seckz so wehn tehy woke up tehy put tehir clothes on. when pheenicks woke up he kot egedwerth moking out wit maya so he was pissed butt egedworth shot him dead and maya didnr kare becuz she was koising edgewort

Phoenix: Finally, I’m dead so I can be spared from every humiliation.

Franziska: Another murder charge? Noted.

Maya: It’s not right. I do care for everyone and I would not treat death as mere child’s play.

Edgeworth: You do have the "right" choice of word, even in this type of scenario.

gumshoo woek up end raped perl tehn he sad whet hepppend 2 feenickskcskx edge wort wus making out so he couldnt say anything butt gumshoo saw teh rifle and teh gunshotz so he siad seems legit edgewort. tehn he raped perl twice as hard.

All: …

Maya: Please, tell me my eyes were mistaken.

tehn he raped perl twice as hard.

Maya: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Edgeworth: (That’s how you explain killing two birds in one stone or killing four sporkers in one statement.)

Franziska: What in monstrosity?

Edgeworth: (closing his eyes) You mean the language aspect or narrative aspect?

Franziska: Obviously the language aspect…and narrative aspect.

Maya: ARGH! THAT’S IT! (abruptly standing up) I don’t care if the spirit or ghost would haunt this new sporking theater. I am only two centimeters away from that decision.

(Phoenix tries to restrain Maya)

Phoenix: Oh no, she was about to-

Edgeworth: Ms. Fey, please restrain yourself. (Please, not now! If Mia found out about that, I’m getting sore)

Franziska: (That’s sad. Shame on you, fools. No one talks about how horrible Detective Gumshoe was written. Of course, I don't outright say that because I don’t want to show my empathetic emotion especially to these trio fools. No one is a mind reader anyway.)

Management: I can read mind. Thank you very much!

Franziska: Agree, welco…what?

wehn egdewrorth was dun with maya he siad the uther ruum smelz liek weed maya waented 2 ckeck it out and gumshoo was having fun with sexks. maya and ecgenfejenworth went 2 teh other ruum and found ther neibor.

Edgeworth: Alright, let’s bet for the mysterious neighbor.

Phoenix: I bet it would be Franziska von-

*WHIP*

Phoenix: OWOWOWOWOWOW!

Franziska: I will not be in the story sooner unlike you trio fool.

Maya: Hmm. It reminds me of Dee Vasquez from the first case we’re working together. You know, the pipe smoke she always holding.

tehri neibor wux a famos drug deeler naemd matt engarde

*WHIP*

Phoenix: YEOOOOWCCHHHH!

Franziska: Serves right of having the wrong answer.

Edgeworth: Matt Engarde? He should be in jail for the murder and now, he is doing another type of crime.

Maya: Now, he gets fame from doing an infamous crime. What an unfair for someone working on a clean career.

Phoenix: And would you consider assistant as a career?

Maya: Come on, Nick, it wasn’t that bad.

when matt saw tehm come into his room he said GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR FAGGOTS! IMMMA FUCKING TIRED OF YOU FUCKING BLACKS SO GET THE FUCK DOWN!

Edgeworth: I just realize that this one they’re doing can be considered a physical invasion of neigborhood’s property. It may work as a basis for theft and robbery. They may be arrested for this crime, that is.

Phoenix: That means you are in for Matt Engarde. How pathetic?

Edgeworth: Only for this situation, Mr. Wright.

I SIAD GET THE FUCK DOWN YOU FUCKING JEW! YOU FUCKING BLACK-ASSED FAGGOT JEW BLACK GAY FAG!

Franziska: Ah. The only one of the instances that the author gets spelling right 15 times per its word. No, missing punctuation always convinces me that I don’t congratulate this fiction. And also, no, you’re still not constructing a perfect sentence which is clean of grammar errors.

Edgeworth: Also, in the exception of scripts, you can just add “screamed Engarde” rather than having unnecessary all-capitalization techniques.

maya got a rifel and shawt him ded egde worth found he had $420,666,696,969 dollerz wurth uv weed and kokaine. so maya sad were rich! yea! man i want sum weed rite now egde worth lit up a blunt and smokd it 4 a few munits

Edgeworth: It looks like the "basis of theft and robbery" is based all along.

Franziska: Another charge of second-degree murder? Noted. A charge of robbery? Noted. A charge of possession of illegal drugs? Noted. Now, this is a pile-up on my table in the prosecution's office.

Maya/Edgeworth: HEY!

Phoenix: So, any thoughts on practicing illegal vices, guys?

Maya: Not in a million years. Or make it a billion years. Food is my recreational enjoyment only.

Edgeworth: I would prefer not to suffocate with my own smoke. I would rather have an obituary similar to this…

CRIME RECONSTRUCTION:Miles Edgeworth died peacefully in the age of 76 from natural death. He serves as Chief Prosecutor who works to tear down corruption and mob crime, thus, bringing back the public’s trust towards the police and court. Everyone misses him including the one who wrote this obituary.

Edgeworth: Not this.

CRIME RECONSTRUCTION:Miles Edgeworth died with financial and social instability with lung disease resulting from addiction to drugs and smoking. He was once a prosecutor but due to unforeseen circumstances, he became a serial killer and drug user, who terrorizes every public and the police. Not sure but why should I write this obituary for a massacre’s culprit?

Phoenix: Good call, good call.

tehn he belw up teh wall 2 tehir room butt teh bellboi was tehre! egde wroth h8ted teh bellboi so he kild him

Franziska: A destruction to one’s property and possession of explosive weapons? No-ted. Congratulations, you are now the chaos towards the society.

Edgeworth: Alright, this is insane. What reason is there that I have hatred for the bellboy, enough to kill him? No, aside from illegal vices or the races.

(Maya was about to speak)

Edgeworth: If you’re asking about why it is necessary to blow a room, maybe to hide the body. However, this purpose destroys if you add another charge of murder after that.

Maya: …

Phoenix: Well, after that, they have to go home and do what is typical in this fanfiction. You know, the three-letter word thingy?

Franziska: …

Management: The Management reminds Phoenix Wright that this sporking session is now in freestyle mode. You can do whatever you want.

Phoenix: How about leaving the theater?

Management: …No.

Phoenix: Damn.

tehn tehre wure 68 moar witnezzez so maya, edgeowrht, and gumshoo kild tehm all the total killin aded up to 69 pepel

Phoenix: Hey, the total kill count should be 72 since you killed fic-me, the guy from the McDonald, and Matt Engarde. The correct term here is "total witness kill count" or “total killing added up to 69 witnesses”

Franziska: Then, you are now the public enemy to society. Also, congratulations, by massacre, you created another set of witnesses that you needed to kill. Either way, it’s unsuccessful.

Edgeworth: NGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!

Maya: WE! ARE! NOT! CRIMINAL!

egde wroth rapd perl and sad thet you were a witess 2 so he kild her

(Edgeworth was about to speak)

Maya: Nope, just nope.

(Edgeworth concedes)

Franziska: (Nice choice.)

tehn tehy wantred to get the fuk out so tehy did.

Franziska: A worst charge goes to the rape, sexual assault, murder, and child abuse. This story should have been titled, “A List of Crimes for Dummies. Don’t Forget that Wrong Grammar is a Moralistic Crime to the Language”.

Maya: Or “Ten Reasons Why Mr. Edgeworth Should Not Be The Hobo, Don’t Believe Number 5”

Edgeworth: “Ten Logical Reasons Why Bad Fanfiction Should Be Burned In Ground, Number Seven would shock you.”

Phoenix: And “Ten Tips to Insult Everyone In the World, Number 3 will Probably Start a World War 3”

Management: Or “Ten Why’s of Existence of Sporking Theatre, Number 1 satisfies you”

(The four glares at the Management)

Management: …Right, here goes the outro.

Phoenix/Maya: Ahh, FINALLY!

Edgeworth: (Finally and argh, my food getting colder.)

NOTE ANNOUNCEMENT THE rasist ternabot series is DISCONTINUED!

Franziska: Finally, I can now escape from the torturous fic with no respect to English grammar.

Maya: At least, everything they do to us, especially Pearly, will be finally over. OVER!

Phoenix: Hmm, at least this session ends early as possible. (Or I mean, too early.)

Edgeworth: A toast for the admittance of fiction’s discontinuation!

Maya: Cheers, Mr. Edgeworth! (Edgeworth drinks the tea)

but it will be continued in MILES EDGEWORTH: ACE ATTORNEY!

Edgeworth: PFFFTTTTTTT!!!!..(cough)...(cough)

Phoenix/Maya: Miles Edgeworth: Ace Attorney??

Edgeworth: You read that right. So, I’m not going to imagine what would be in this story.

Franziska: Again, it’s impossible, especially everything that occurs. What can you expect from the PIC who would reinstate Mr. Miles Edgeworth in his prosecution career, who recently joined the terror group, the serial killer, the drug user, and above all, the child abuser?

Edgeworth: No need to spell it out but good point, good point. (At least, I’m not going to read another of this shark-jumping thematic fic.) -- (The light turns on, then the cinema screen fades out) Maya: Alright, since it’s over, now it’s time for our comment and we leave.

HOLD IT!

Management: Never rush because there is still more I can say regarding this.

Franziska: Then, why are we still here? That’s the full story. Zero, zip, zilch, nada anything to spork. The author even stated the discontinuation.

Management: …Mr. Wright.

Phoenix: !!!

Management: You know the contradiction that I have been showing to you.

Edgeworth: What contradiction you’re talking about?

Management: Come on, oh wait. Forget the contradiction. I mean this story ends, so thus the sporking session.

Phoenix: My psyche-locks. It’s…I know he’s lying

Come on, oh wait. Forget the contradiction. I mean this story ends, so thus the sporking session.

Phoenix: But what?

Management: Oh, you notice it. Alright, let’s have this one to be noticed in formality and simplicity. I am the one who was contradicted. But when exactly?

Phoenix: You were contradicted when…

A. Beginning

B. During

C. Ending

Phoenix: The ending, itself!

Management: !!!

Phoenix: Specifically the last fic statement. You even tell us that the next statement is the outro. This is not something that the Management would warn us about. That’s the only time you do.

Management: I do that because it is for your goodness.

Phoenix: Let’s connect to the beginning, shall we? You are vague about the stories, you never tell us if it’s multi-chaptered or stand-alone. I guess revealing the story's title but during the sporking is brilliant. So, the only time we have is reacting through it. Also, the buffet is so much in quantity. We don’t have time to eat everything else if this sporking session ends right now.

Edgeworth: Argh! You mean?

Phoenix: Yes, the Management is a liar. So, my conclusion here is that…

There is something else in this fanfiction that we yet to see.

Management: Interesting conclusion. But let me tell you, is there any confirmation for your conclusion? Maybe what I do is for the greater good.

Phoenix: So, basically you’re asking for proof?

Management: Right, but I’m tired of hearing “proof”, so yeah! And don’t make any attempt to research this fanfic. All internet and data connections are cut down to bits.

Phoenix: (Now, There is something in my mind for a bit.)

Phoenix: Wait. I think about it. Where is the...

Franziska: You mean anything with perfect spelling and grammar?

Phoenix: No, no, I mean the-

Franziska: A creative name rather than naming "the beginning" as the introduction to the narrative.

Phoenix: No, no, it's the-

Franziska: Zero, zip, zich, nada.

Phoenix: Argh!

Phoenix: Now the question is: Is there anything that I can prove that the fiction is multi-chaptered? Or can I prove it?

A. YES

B. NO

Phoenix: No…NO! There is no contradiction. You’re just mistaken. (Of course, if I said yes, the sporking session would-)

Management: Liar, you indeed denying it. You have doubts, aren’t you? You and I know what is a contradiction and there should be a proof for that. You’re not going away from this Theater if we never arrive at the absolute truth.

Phoenix: (Argh! He’s the Management. Of course, I have no control of the situation.)

Management: Your response, Mr. Wright?

Phoenix: (It seems I have no choice.)

A. YES

B. NO (DENIED)

Phoenix: Yes, I have proof.

Management: Ok, tell me. What’s your confirmation that this story is multi-chaptered, not a stand-alone?

Phoenix: Obviously, the sporking transcript with attached fiction. (Besides, I don’t have anything else other than my badge, a glass of water, and a chicken sandwich.)

Management: A transcript? You know, it’s synonymous with throwing me a Physics book and asking me to learn numbers but that would turn out vague, don’t you think? So, tell me specifically, what part of the transcript would you emphasize?

A. First part

B. Middle part

C. Last part

Phoenix: Obviously, the last part, the one when you are contradicted.

Management: Ok, we narrow from book to chapter. However, it’s not very specific. Tell me, what statement of the fiction would you want to focus on?

A. Third to the last

B. Second to the last

C. Last

Phoenix: Second to the last!

NOTE ANNOUNCEMENTTHE rasist ternabot series is DISCONTINUED!

Management: Alright, we narrow down from chapter to page. However, we are still nowhere from specificity.

Phoenix: I want you to focus…

A. NOTE ANNOUNCEMENT

B. THE rasist ternabot series is DISCONTINUED!

Phoenix: This statement!

Management: This one? But it only tells the discontinuance of a fiction, even Mr. Edgeworth emphasized this…with a toast.

Phoenix: That’s why I have to point out a word within this statement.

Management: Interesting! So, tell me what word you have to pinpoint yourself.

A. THE

B. rasist

C. ternabot

D. series

E. is

F. DISCONTINUED

Phoenix: The word I have to focus on is series.

Management: !!!

Phoenix: By its definition, it’s a set of writings written in the same format. Maybe, the writing can be considered a chapter while the set makes up into whole fanfiction. If the fiction we spork is a stand-alone story, he should only state it as “the rasist turnabout story”. So, what we’re reading the whole story is only Chapter 1.

Edgeworth: GAH! Is it true?

Phoenix: Not only that. I can say with certainty that a note announcement does not belong to the first chapter. It belongs to another chapter.

Management: GAH!

Phoenix: Is that right, Mr. Management?

Management: You’re really Phoenix Wright, after all. I take it.

Phoenix: So, you admit it?

Management: Fine, everything is true. The note announcement, the second-to-the-last and the last statement, belongs to Chapter 7…

Franziska: So, you mean to tell me that the fiction contains seven whole chapters?

Management: Not something that you think. The correct term here is that you have already read Chapter 1 and Chapter 7 or the beginning and the end. And also I intentionally omit the part of the story, especially the first ones. So, the true one would be like this:

cheptr 1 teh weed warz

chapetr wan: teh beginin

Franziska: PHOENIX WRIGHT!

Phoenix: (Oh no.)

Franziska: WHY YOU NEVER TELL ME IN THE VERY BEGINNING?

Phoenix: I tried to tell you but you...

(Franziska was about to whip Phoenix but-)

Management: Well, the true outro for Chapter 1 goes to…

2 be kontinued!1111!

All: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

---

Phoenix: And just like that, our dignity comes to an end. I ran away from the theater... and wandered the streets alone. I never saw my friends again. I heard the comment about this fiction. It’s bad literally, it destroys me. The “miracle” indeed never happen. Maybe it was never meant to. Because a "miracle" is something that doesn't exist.

---

END OF CHAPTER 1

COMING SOON FOR CHAPTER 2

[lemonne-12]

I mean, last year, another theater kid and I literally ate plastic sporks, but that's beside the point.

Spot the peoblem:

Me and a bunch of other theater kids just went to the convince store to buy snacks.

We bought, in total, 11 energy drinks.

There were 7 of us.

[bookgeekgrrl]

My media this week (28 Jan-3 Feb 2024)

📚 STUFF I READ 📚

🥰 The Last Devil to Die (Thursday Murder Club #4) (Richard Osman, author; Fiona Shaw, narrator) - still loving the characters, love to hang out with them & Osman's plots move along nicely so you don't get bored at all. Fiona Shaw's narration is great & as a little treat she & Osman have a nice little chat at the end.

🥰 Four Letter Word For Intercourse (bendingsignpost) - 194K, destiel AU - adult college student Dean & professor (and phone sex worker) Cas - LOVE this fic so much & had kind of forgotten about it until it came up as a rec in one of my romance discord servers. Just, so good.

😊 Mrs Sidhu Investigates (Suk Pannu, author; full voice cast) - 2 episodes of the BBC Radio 4 program: #1 Murder with Masala; #2 Mrs Sidhu's Dangerous Highland Game - I prefer the slight changes made for the TV show's characterizations but still eminently enjoyable. (Meera Syal still absolutely rules!)

🥰 Lucky Bounce (Cait Nary) - extremely delightful hockey romance. Low/no angst, charming, cutie MCs. Definitely in the 'no plot, just vibes' category which honestly I love when done skillfully.

💖💖 +102K of shorter fic so shout out to these I really loved 💖💖

Ye Olde YouTube Love Story (Aria_Lerendeair) - The Sandman: Dreamling, 7K - love dreamling human AUs

Any Givens Sundae (dancinbutterfly) - Justified: Boyd/Raylan, 25K - excellently written 'what-if' pinging off a random line of dialogue: what IF Raylan had retired & decided to sell ice cream?

A Warning from Henry the Eighth (Writer_at_the_Table) - "I'm Henry VIII I Am" - Herman's Hermits: , 152 - a villianelle about I'm 'Enry The Eighth by Herman's Hermits - the creativity & cleverness of fan makers truly is boundless

master of a nothing place (strzyga) - Star Trek: Spirk, 6K - short, great fic about Spock going feral when they're trapped on a planet

📺 STUFF I WATCHED 📺

Austin City Limits - Pat Benatar & Neil Giraldo (s49, e9)

Austin City Limits - Duran Duran (s47, e11)

Murdoch Mysteries - s16, e7

Dirty Laundry - s3, e11

D20: Fantasy High: Junior Year - "Under Pressure" (s21, e4)

D20: Adventuring Party - "A Sea of Effluvia" (s16, e4)

Hazbin Hotel - s1, e1

🎧 PODCASTS 🎧

What Next: TBD - Why Is Everybody Sick?

Under the Influence with Terry O'Reilly - Cannabis Marketing

⭐ The Sporkful - Why Hibachi Gets Complicated

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - The Guerrero

How To! - How To Be Free Of Body Shame

⭐ The Atlas Obscura Podcast - Hello From The Otter Side

The Allusionist - 188. Lipread

The Weirdest Thing I Learned This Week - Nature's Weirdest Sleepers, Iron Maiden Myths, Parking Psychology

⭐ Today, Explained - Living in Zyn

It's Been a Minute - Ayesha Rascoe on 'HBCU Made' — and some good old college memories

⭐ Switched on Pop - The b*tch of loving musical theater (with Bridger Winegar)

99% Invisible #568 - Don't Forget to Remember

⭐ Vibe Check - You’ve Got Mouth Bangs, Girl

I Said No Gifts! - Lou Wilson Disobeys Bridger

Well, Now - How ER Taught Thousands Of Viewers About Cervical Cancer

Off Menu - Ep 220: Peter Capaldi

Films To Be Buried With - Kyle MacLachlan

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - Seeking The (Minnesota-shaped) Forest Through The Trees - Part 1 & 2

Welcome to Night Vale #241 - He Is Still Holding a Knife

I Said No Gifts! - Zac Oyama Disobeys Bridger

Dear Prudence - Am I a Bigot If I Don’t Want to Date Foreigners? Help!

What Next: TBD - The Taylor Swift Deepfake Saga

It's Been a Minute - Charlamagne tha Pundit?; plus, was Tony Soprano white?

⭐ All Songs Considered - Why we still love Green Day

Under the Influence with Terry O'Reilly - The Marketing of Taylor Swift: (Taylor's Version)

Consider This from NPR - Masturbation Abstinence Is Popular, And Doctors Are Worried

⭐ You're Dead to Me - Madam C.J. Walker

🎶 MUSIC 🎶

Pop Radio • Romance

'80s Metal

The Cars Radio • Pump-up

Psychobilly Swing

Rock Mix • Party

Presenting Iron Maiden

[sporkkles-irl]

m sorry for not posting any art recently school just insta-killed me but i am chipping away at 2 wips rn so maybe ill finish one of them soon

[mysticmeadowscamp]

some teacher: yknow you used to be so smart and responsible just a few years ago, what happened?

logan “no bones, what is a spork, plays every instrument in existence, perfect kermit the frog voice, uses cats as phones, steals movie theater sign letters, keith” rowell: i don’t know what you’re talking about i’m exactly the same

hes still smart and responsible now hes just The Cooler Logan