#specifically with bratwurst

[etchif]

"Warning, the stork steals sausages"

[fanficsforheartandsoul]

Swiss!Reader: Böögg

Gaz to Ghost: What date is it today?

Ghost: The 17th of April why?

Gaz, smiling distortedly: only 50 days and 18 hours until I can finally go home for a while.

Ghost: ... Are you counting the minutes as well?

Gaz: Yes, actually it's 48 minutes-

GIANT EXPLOSION HEARD IN THE BACKGROUND:

Ghost:

Gaz:

Soap, startling out of his nap: wha- what the hell??

All three of them walking to the window, looking outside:

Reader in the yard, screaming and crying at the top of their lungs, standing in front of a burning puppet on a pedestal: FUCKING HELL!!! König, this summer will be shit, why didn't you gallop faster, du huere saugoof junge!!

König, huffing, running circles around the fire with a hobbyhorse: Y/N, I can't- scheisse- I'm so tired please, it's been 50 minutes-

Reader, bawling: Ich wott hei gha man, und Bratwürscht gits au nöd!!

Gaz: Uhm... what the hell is going on?

Soap, turning around to go back to the couch to nap: It's a tradition.

Ghost:

Also Ghost, under his breath: I fucking hate these KorTac guys.

[sirhamburrger]

cookies burning on an oven fire (oliver aiku x gn!reader)

oliver aiku is a master on the football pitch. in the kitchen, though? not so much. it doesn't mean you don't want him there, though. although it's been said many times, many ways // merry christmas to you || wc: 530 || tags/cw: mostly fluff, oliver is a hopeless baker, hurt/comfort in a flashback, oliver is annoying about calling football 'soccer', is it obvious i have only baked once in my life and don't remember anything about it, temp is in celsius not fahrenheit if you were wondering series m.list

oliver smells like smoke. he doesn't smoke.

“right,” you sigh. “what happened?”

“i… put them in at 360 degrees for half the time.”

you raise an eyebrow. “okay, and what were my very specific instructions?”

your boyfriend flinches at your deceptively calm expression. 

“180forfifteenminutes.”

you let out a huff, defeated. “just stick to football next time, please.”

“okay, firstly,” oliver grabs your arm as you walk past him to the oven, pulling you backwards into him, burying his nose in your hair. you roll your eyes, but let him cling to you like an oversized koala. “soccer. not football. and-” he clasps his arms around your waist, squeezing you tight - “i'm not that bad at baking!”

“explain that fiasco, then,” you retort, not unkindly. you shuffle forward slowly, hindered by the weight of him leaning on you.

“älskling, i can do other things too, y'know?”

“like boiling an egg or putting frozen bratwurst in the microwave?” you deadpan.

“touché,” oliver concedes. 

with you, he does the walk of shame over to the kitchen, where the bitter tang of burnt gingerbread still lingers in the air; a testament to his failure. you stare into the oven. in just six and a half minutes, they've gone from tantalising cookie dough to charred lumps of sadness.

you make him clear the oven out, and he makes you coffee afterwards. you sip it slowly - he’s made it just how you like it - and decide he’s forgiven. just this once.

“mein schatz?”

“hm?”

“remember the first time we made cookies together?”

you feel the corners of your lips twitch upwards.

“yeah. it went pretty well, unlike today.”

even as you say the words, you feel your heart constrict ever so slightly. it's a fond memory, yes, but it wasn't all good. 

you recall two christmases ago, when oliver had showed up at your door after the u20 match against blue lock. his then-girlfriend had just left him, and he was sitting silently in your kitchen not saying anything at all. after all, what is a young soccer prodigy to do after his first bad breakup, if not seek out his best friend? 

that day, you baked cookies with him in this very kitchen, spiced with cinnamon and topped with lemon zest. he smiled, then, and you couldn't help but think that you'd never seen anything so beautiful.

it was a long time after that before you finally became what you are today. but you knew, from then on, that it would be the start of something new. 

and now he's your boyfriend of almost a year who takes you to his games, buys you flowers and burns your christmas cookies.

it takes a few gentle taps on your hand before you finally register he's pushed something across the counter to you.

“i checked the oven just now,” he says with a twinkle in his eye, “and these two look a little more edible than the others.”

the two gingerbread people sit on a plate, fused together like they're holding hands. he breaks them apart, taps his cookie against yours. you giggle at his antics.

“to us.”

he smiles, taking your hand in his.

“to us.”

a/n: through the writing of this i have been forced to like oliver

taglist: @anglefish3008, @standcom (closed, event completed)

bllk masterlist || general masterlist

© sirhamburrger 2024

[emsprovisions]

❄️ Day 15 - Christmas Abroad ❄️

🎁 Today's fic is dedicated to @lightningboltreader!

Summary: TK and Carlos are visiting a Christmas Market in Berlin!

Word count: 802

Prompt inspired by "fluffy winter holiday prompts" found here

24 Days of Tarlos Masterpost

After so much meticulous planning, packing, and hours spent in a plane, the boys finally find themselves at their European destination for the holidays. And today’s adventure is exploring the Christmas markets around Berlin, more specifically the Weihnachtszeit at the Rotes Rathaus.

It had been a joint decision to go and spend the holidays in Europe this year. Their travel agent had helped them book plenty of activities to do while they visited, and they are looking forward to spending long winter nights keeping each other warm.

It’s dusk, and both TK and Carlos are bundled up in thick coats to explore the wintery outdoor shops. 

“This is nothing like our farmers market at home, huh, babe?” TK asks, eyes wide and bright as he looks around at all the sights before them.

The Christmas market here is a true sight to behold. There’s a line of actual shops in little stalls–back home, farmers markets tend to pop up in parking lots on the weekend, with vendors setting up pop-up tents and tables to sell their wares. Here, almost everything seems entirely handcrafted–also different from how it could be back home, where the handcrafted things you’d be lucky to find in Austin might include soaps or some sort of bedazzled UT merch. There’s also so much food–also in stalls, not a single food truck in sight–that TK’s mouth is practically watering no matter which direction they turn.

“This is amazing,” Carlos responds, just looking around in similar awe. “I know we’ve seen Christmas Market tours on some of those travel shows we watch, but I almost didn’t believe they really are like this.”

TK laughs softly, wrapping both his arms around one of Carlos’s as they walk. “I know what you mean. This is so fantastic. We’re going to fill that empty suitcase we brought with so many presents for everyone.”

“I hope so,” Carlos smiles, pressing a kiss to TK’s forehead.

All of the stalls that line the cobblestone street are decorated in garland with red bows and Christmas lights. It’s crowded, bustling with people from all over the world who are enjoying being tourists, just like them. There’s street performers, and children laughing, Christmas trees, a giant ferris wheel, and an ice rink that circles the Neptune Fountain.

“Do you want some mulled wine, baby?” TK asks, jutting his chin out to gesture at the nearby stall.

“Maybe after we go ice skating?” Carlos bites his bottom lip, his eyes dazzling as he poses the idea. 

TK grins, leaning forward to kiss Carlos gently. “Sounds like a perfect idea to me. Do you even know how to skate?”

“Not even a little bit,” Carlos admits with a laugh as they head for the ticket booth to rent some skates and get on the ice. 

“Good thing you’re married to a junior hockey champ, then,” TK’s eyes gleam as he teases Carlos, who fondly rolls his eyes and exchanges money with the ticket vendor.  

A few minutes later, they’re on the ice, swirling around the Neptune Fountain, and Carlos is clinging to TK’s arm as he tries to keep his balance on his skates. TK just laughs as he helps guide his husband on the ice. 

“Glide, baby, just like this, you’ve got it!” He encourages, guiding Carlos around the rink and giving him pointers. “Don’t pick up your feet. You’re doing so well!”

By the time Carlos is managing to skate on his own, and is only holding TK’s hand by choice, Santa flies overhead on a sleigh, waving at the crowd of people. TK turns to Carlos, his face lit up with a smile.

“Holy shit, babe! This place is so fucking magical.”

After they finish skating, they decide to get some food and drink, going around the different food vendors to split bratwurst, halloumi fries, and a baked apple. They watch two performers juggle fire and do acrobatics as they eat, and do a little shopping when they’re done, picking out a new pair of handcrafted earrings for Andrea, and an ornament for their own tree at home. 

Before long, Carlos is ordering them two hot chocolates and leading TK towards the ferris wheel line. They snuggle into a gondola together, TK’s head on Carlos’s shoulder as the ferris wheel begins to move, sending them towards the top and the lit up view of Berlin at night.

“This has already been such an amazing trip, baby. I’m glad we came,” TK smiles from his spot on Carlos’s shoulder. 

Carlos has an arm wrapped around TK and drops a kiss to the top of his head. “I’m glad we came too, babe.”

Carlos tips his head against TK’s as they watch Berlin go by, sipping the hot cocoas in their hands and enjoying the warmth provided by their husband.

[tf2heritageposts]

More positive thing for your inbox: Mort seems very cool!!! What are their nicknames for everyone, if you have more than what you mentioned in your post from last night? Also is there any particular reasons for the specific nicknames they've given others?

oh hey sure

mort's nicknames for everyone

scout- chicken nugget (bucket of chicken and is pretty small compared to the others. despite being 3 inches taller than them)

mort is the pyro so

soldier- jarhead (no food based nickname. a jarhead is a member of the marines and usually used in a more derogatory sense)

heavy- hoagie (a hoagie is a very big sandwich)

demoman- martini (guess)

engineer- actually usually calls them engie or even dell but does sometimes call him toasty (just short for texas toast)

medic- usually calls him "the surgeon general" in a deragutory way but also calls him pretzel or bratwurst

sniper - mort calls him slim jim but this actually comes from mort thinking sniper's name is actually jimmy after misunderstanding something. sniper just thinks mort is being a dick for a very long time

spy- french fry

[ruthlesscore]

hello !

i’ve been enjoying your writing for sf6 lately, and i was wondering if you’d be able to write anything for ed?

i don’t have any specific scenario, but can it be with an x reader insert? haha i’m just craving any sort of ed content tbh

thanks !

Ed x Hacker!Reader - Meeting Ed

- This is my first request for SF6! I was already planning on making a Ed related post so this is like killing two birds with one stone! I hope you enjoy! <3 -

You weren't a Street Fighter. You had more brains than those ruffians that go around beating up anything that moves. As an intellectual, you're enrolled in college to peruse your dream in technology. You had friends here and there, like Li-Fen, who lived in Chinatown, and some people who worked in SiRN.

You were from a working class household, only 23, constantly having to pay off your tuition. You didn't have money to afford food sometimes. You started picking up part-time jobs, some were odd, others were impractical. They never lasted long. You frequently got fired for being late or sleeping on the job. Your excuse?

"School's got me brunt out. I'm sorry, it won't happen again!"

and it didn't happen again because now youre jobless. Sitting at home, rotting away in front of your computer, you decided you needed a new job and fast. Something more practical that didn't require you to leave the comfort of your dorm.

You serached for a week or so before coming across this group called Neo Shadoloo. You've heard about Shadoloo from your many conversations with Li-Fen. The experiments they conducted on innocent children disgust you. You were glad they were gone. But if Shadoloo was gone, who the was Neo Shadoloo?

Adding the phone number to your contacts, you messaged the individual names Ed.

I saw the flyer for Neo Shadaloo. You guys hiring?

You got a response almost immediately.

Hell yeah we are. You gotta have some sort of experience in tech. You a hacker? You legit?

Yeah. What do you need done?

Just getting information from certain databases. Anything about Shadaloo, M. Bison, the experiments, or where the remnants might be. I'll send the pay to you later.

And that's the day you started cyber attacks for this strange organization. At first, you felt guilty about this. Then you were uncertain about the job because what you were doing was illegal. But then you looked at the pay and god DAMN. Who cares about morals when this shady organization is sending you 700 zenny per task.

After your first couple of jobs, Ed started to message you about things outside of work, like the history of Shadaloo, sightseeing in Metro, your studies at university, and personal philosophies. Sometimes, when you're up at night, you'd receive a text from him. You don't know if it was because he was under the influence, or that men usually act this way past 10, but he would send messages that were so strange. You couldn't tell if he was flirting or he was telling a bad joke.

You single? Of course you are. Nobody born in the shitty ass city will treat you right.

Ed, what the hell are you talking about?

You like Bratwurst? Ever had one? I could give you one.

Please go to sleep, Ed.

Only if you're sleeping with me.

Promise you'll make me breakfast in the morning?

Yeah, you're delirious. Gtb, ____.

You didn't know him personally, so the meaning is still up for grabs. The morning after these messages, Ed wouldn't even bring it up, if anything, he was avoiding it. Maybe he was under the influence.

After working for Neo Shadaloo for about 3 months, constantly messaging Ed and feeding into his nightly banter, you received a message from Ed.

Hey. I need you to come pick something up from me. It's a hard drive we need decoded. I'll be at the station at Beat Square tonight. Pull through.

You didn't even answer the message. You put your shoes on and headed out the door that night. Of course you were carrying your handy-dandy knife, as you were no fan of fighting. Hopefully no one tries to mug you or something. Heading down into the station and getting onto the train, you ran into a problem. What the hell does Ed even look like? You've never seen a photo of him and he's never seen you. How are you going to meet with someone you don't even know? Then there was a second problem, one running right towards you, a man and Shadaloo fighters.

The man held onto the overhead railing as the train shook. You lost your footing and fell onto the window. Groaning in a tinge of pain, you sit down. The man paid no attention to you. He looked at the Shadaloo fighters.

"Bring it on."

The Shadaloo fighters tried striking him. He dodged with boxer like reflexes. You silently watched the fight go down, completely dumbfounded by how brutal street fights were. God, it was disgusting. You get it, Shadaloo was a bad organization enabling bad behavior, but doing something as petty as strert fighting? Surely, there was a more mature, more intelligent way of handling affairs, right? With god like reflexes, the boxer hit all 3 of the Shadaloo fighters, knocking them to the ground. He managed to maintain his footing, even though the train was moving so unsteadily.

All of a sudden a big fighter came out, pushing the smaller ones out of the way. You pull your knees up to your chest, hoping you'd appear so small that neither the blond boxer or the Shadaloo fighter wouldn't see you. The big one tries to grab the boxer when the train car shook. The boxer's fist was suddenly engulfed in purple flames. Punching the Shadaloo fighter to the other side of the car and using some sort of supernatural ability to pull the fighter back to him, he punched the fighter's face into the ground. There's no denying it. That was Ed and he was using Psycho Power. He didn't even look your way. Once the train stopped, he quickly got off.

Once you got off the train, you quickly looked around for him. You see him and hurriedly walked over to him. With your hood up and mask on, you stopped a few feet away from Ed and showed him your messages with him. He glanced at the message before taking the hard drive out.

"So you're ____, huh. Finally got to put a name to a face."

He looks you up and down.

"Still down for that Bratwurst?"

[syn4k]

One busy evening at Sanctuary's Tavern, one of the rare ones where Pix was able to visit, Sausage was waiting a bar where some of his fellow emperors sat, all chattering amongst themselves and most listening intently to his tale of how he saved Sanctuary from himself. (Technically, he was right! It was just a couple timelines away, and he still counted it as being him.)

"And then Hermes- well, you already know what Hermes did," he concluded cheerfully, polishing a glass. "He did so well!"

"He really did," Joel agreed with a nod. He'd been wrangled into some casual clothes and a much less conspicuous height of 6'0 for the purposes of this evening, reaching the same height as Pixl as he sat on a bar stool. "Cheers to my boy!"

"Cheers!" repeated the rest of the table, raising their glasses in celebration. Jimmy downed his entire glass of tequila, coughing a little, and pushed it towards Sausage for a refill, who frowned.

"Now, Jimmy," he started, "I'm sorry, but you're not allowed to have any more this evening."

"Aw, come on," protested Jimmy, who was a notable lightweight and had downed 4 glasses of alcohol before this one.

"You know how you get when you've had too much to drink," said Sausage patiently but firmly.

"I do not, actually, thank you very much!" said Jimmy, crossing his arms with his face flushed. Fwhip, who had once gotten into a vicious bar fight with the man after too many glasses of his own, just coughed, earning himself a glare from Jimmy and a slight raising of eyebrows from Pixl, who was looking at something that Joel was showing him on his phone.

"Anyways," said Sausage, "you can have water. Just water. As much water as you want!"

Jimmy sulked and looked like he was about to protest, but after a warning elbow jab from Fwhip he shut his mouth.

"That spell you mention using to get out of the prison Bratwurst put you in sounds pretty interesting," said Pixl now, taking a sip of his own drink. "Must be a pretty powerful one if it can break restrictions that strong."

"Mhm," said Sausage, turning around to get some more ingredients for a drink that another patron had called for. "Very old, very dangerous, but the only one that would work in this situation."

"I guess you're not gonna tell us how to do it, then, will you?" asked Joel lightly.

Sausage shook his head. "Oh, no," he said, quite cheerfully. "You'd get vaporized in at least five planes, seven dimensions, and three timeliness. That's if you just pronounce a word wrong!"

"Oh," said Jimmy. The table was silent for a bit before he spoke up again. "Does the recipe include like, end crystals or something?"

"Nope," said Sausage. "Just some simple stuff like a piece of paper, a compass, some candles..."

"Ooh, candles," said Joel, taking another sip of his drink. "Did you trade them from Gem or something?"

"Nope," said Sausage airily, walking across the bar to hand the glass to the patron. Returning, he explained, "They were just lying about in some random universe when I found them and used them for the spell. Don't worry, I only took like, sixteen. That was all I needed."

"Weirdly specific, but okay," said Fwhip with a shrug. "Pix, you good over there?"

Sausage turned around to see Pixl looking slightly scandalized at his description of his actions. He shook his head with a silent sigh, waving it off with one hand. "Yeah, yeah, no. I'm sure it was for a good cause."

"Saving the entire world!" interjected Sausage brightly.

"Exactly," said Pixl, not sounding like he was done. Fwhip hid a grin behind one hand. "However,"

"Shot yourself in the foot, mate," said Jimmy.

"-however," repeated Pixl, shooting him a look, "as the local archaeologist, I cannot endorse those kinds of actions." He took a sip of his drink as Sausage stood there slightly awkwardly, looking to one side for anyone who might need anything as an easy way out. "But that's just me being an arse about it." He shrugged. "There was nobody there to ask anyways."

In Sausage's head ever since he'd merged himself with the other timelines' versions of him, he occasionally got vague senses or flashes of feelings in the back of his mind from those other versions, who were vaguely picking up on what he was experiencing. Sometime these were some instructions for a spell, or his hands being taken over for a brief moment to perform an action that had been muscle memory for him in another timeline (or so he assumed), but at their simplest they were flashes of memories or emotions as this one was.

Somewhere, it seemed, Bratwurst himself had perked up at the mention of his name, recognized Pixl's voice, and had frantically started sending the mental equivalent of "cut it out" hand motions to Sausage... but why?

"Be right back," said Sausage, hopping over the counter with a grin. "Duty calls." The groans that followed him as he found his way to the bathroom and locked the door behind him told him that he'd distracted his guests, at least for the moment, and he sat down on the toilet seat with a sigh, placing his head in his hands. What is it? he asked into the void.

An image of a sandstone pillar in the vague shape of a candle with a conduit floating above appeared in his mind's eye, and he nodded in recognition. That's the Vigil, he said. I know it. But what's the problem?

You took candles from the Vigil? asked Bratwurst with a tone that Sausage had not heard from him before. And not from the candle shop nearby?

I had to be quick, protested Sausage. They were right there and I didn't even know where the shop was!

A general grumbling filled his mind, and he hurriedly shushed them. Guys, he said desperately. I only took the ones that I needed.

Dios mío, someone sighed.

I need to get back there! Sausage said. Please just tell me what the big deal is!

You, said Bratwurst slowly and with utter seriousness, do not mess with the Vigil. A shiver ran down Sausage's spine, but he stubbornly pushed it off. It'll be fine, he reassured. He doesn't remember.

The copper king remembers everything, said Bratwurst, and an image of a man who looked startlingly like Pixl but wearing a sand-covered cloak embossed with copper-colored threads and with a fiercer sort of aura about him popped into his brain. Sausage knew somehow- he didn't dare press- that this Pixl had killed Bratwurst, and in cold blood as well, and he shivered, but again pushed the sensation aside and kept firm. Different timeline, he said. I'll be fine.

You're taking too long, another voice warned, and with a silent sigh Sausage removed his face from his hands, shook his head to get himself back to reality, and walked back to the bar.

"Welcome back," said Joel as Sausage reentered the counter area, using the proper gate this time. "Congratulations on not falling in."

Sausage just chuckled as Fwhip punched Joel on the shoulder. "I try my best," he said.

Pix caught his eye and gestured him over, and suddenly Sausage's chest felt uncomfortably tight with anxiety. Stop it, he ordered. I know this guy. We're fine.

"I just wanted to say sorry about earlier," said Pixl in a low voice that the others couldn't hear. "I didn't mean to upset you. I know you were completely justified by doing that, it's just a bit of a close subject for me." He sighed. "Still, that was entirely unprovoked. Eddie got me a glass of water after I asked."

Sausage relaxed, though adrenaline was still racing through his blood at the serious, intent stare he was getting. "You're okay," he lied. "You didn't upset me at all. It was just bad timing, that's it."

Pix looked at him for a little longer. "Are you sure?" he asked.

Sausage froze. "Well," he started before getting hit with a jolt of sheer fear so strong that he ran to backtrack instantly. "No, actually. Thank you, though!" He stood up and turned back to the bar shelves, pulse racing. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. He'd responded too fast. He'd stood up too fast. Pixl could absolutely tell, and so could everyone else. He was going to kill-

With an effort, Sausage slammed a wall down between him and the rest of his brain so hard that his head throbbed a little with the force of it.

"Is there anyone here who can maybe carry Jimmy out of here?" asked Fwhip, tilting his head toward the man in question, who had his head resting on his folded arms.

"Me and Joel and Eddie can handle it just fine," Sausage said confidently. "Jimmy's not very heavy."

"I could probably lift him myself," declared Joel.

"Oh, dear," said Sausage, determinedly not looking anywhere near Pixl and watching a relatively large group of very rowdy youths walk in instead. "Un momento, por favor."

Thankfully, it didn't take him and Eddie too long to redirect them out into the street and to a local inn, which, given the state that the group was in, Sausage was sure that money wouldn't be a problem for them. He dusted his hands off as Eddie walked back inside into the loud laughter and light of the tavern, turned around, and startled as Pixl was leaning right next to one of the doors, arms crossed. Sausage was glad he couldn't see his expression.

"Hi," he said, unable to keep the nervousness out of his voice. "Is this about-"

"The candles, yes," said Pixl, not sounding at all tipsy or drunk, which was a good thing, Sausage guessed. "Could you please tell me where exactly you got them?"

Sausage swallowed nervously. "Exactly, or...?"

"Exactly," repeated Pixl.

Shit.

Sausage looked him over quickly. No weapons were allowed at the tavern, and he didn't see anything lying nearby, but Pix was incredibly resourceful when it came to PvE, and he did not doubt for a second that he'd be just as good when fighting another person. An image popped into his mind then of that other Pix in a strange arena surrounded by wither roses, moving fluidly around the obstacles despite being blinded, and taking terrifyingly accurate swings at the enemies coming towards him-

Pix sighed. "I won't press it," he said, standing up and walking back towards the door. "I'm sorry. I don't know what's going on, but I didn't mean to ruin your evening." He paused at the door as Sausage inhaled.

"How," he asked, "did you know about the candles?"

Pix understood the question despite its vagueness. "Something I've been researching for years," he said, voice dropping. "An ancient kingdom called Pixandria. They- a large part of their holy rituals included candles. Sausage."

Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. SHIT.

"Sausage," Pix repeated again, sounding more concerned this time.

"Okay, I took them," said Sausage quickly, stepping backwards. "But only sixteen. I didn't know about the candle shop or the bee farm or anything, I was going for speed. If I had known-" He paused, trying to slow down a little. "I'm sorry," he finished, breathlessly. "Please don't do anything. It was a mistake. I didn't mean anything by it."

In the moonlight, he could see Pix still standing there by the door, hesitating. It opened and Pix stepped backwards, the light casting his face in a golden glow, and Sausage stepped backwards to make way for the people who were leaving.

"You did what?" asked Pixl in disbelief, and Sausage felt his whole body tense up in preparation of a fight, to run, anything. He fucked up. He was absolutely about to die and it was his fault. He stepped backwards as Pixl stepped forwards, then quicker as Pix broke into a half jog to reach him-

"Hey," said Pix as he grabbed Sausage's shoulders with iron strength. "Sausage. Look at me. Look at me."

Sausage took a deep breath and looked up, fully expecting Pixl's face to be a mask of perfect fury, his eyes glinting behind those rectangular glasses, but instead, Pix just looked slightly confused and... worried?

"I was just going to ask if you wanted to take a break," he said, and in his voice Sausage heard a desperation that he had never heard from him before. No, he had. In another life, he had. The voice of a man who had unknowingly caused the unleashing of an ancient evil and exiled himself shortly after, and once after that again for good. The voice of someone that Bratwurst had once celebrated when he learned that he was gone.

The voice of a friend.

"I didn't mean to overwhelm you," said Pixl, more gently now, stepping back and looking uncharacteristically anxious. "I was just caught off guard. I'm sorry. This whole evening- I've ruined it, haven't I?"

No, Sausage wanted to say, it's me, you've done nothing, but his tongue stayed dumb in his mouth as Pixl continued.

"I can go tell Eddie that you've turned in early because you got overwhelmed," he said. "I'll tell the same to everyone else. I just-" He paused, and even in the dim moonlight Sausage could tell by the shadows cast on his face that he was fighting to explain something that he just couldn't put into words. Sausage stepped forwards tentatively, and Pix glanced back up.

"I think," Sausage said, voice growing stronger as he continued, "that we're both dealing with stuff that's too complicated to be explained while standing outside on a dark street. I got spooked, but," he sighed, "please- just don't take all of the blame on yourself, okay?" He paused. "People mess up sometimes. Doesn't mean you have to forgive me. I'm just saying that you're okay."

Pixl nodded. "I wasn't even mad," he said. "Just startled. I think- I think that maybe a wire got crossed somewhere."

In Sausage's head, Bratwurst snorted. That's definitely one way to put it.

Sausage ignored him, holding out a hand. "So... we're good?"

Pix nodded, taking his hand, but instead of shaking it, he let go to give Sausage a hug, his forehead pressing on top of his shoulder. Sausage fumbled a little before returning it, his racing mind stopped mid-thought in surprise. In the back of his mind, he heard someone chuckle. I told you he'd forgive you, they said.

Mmmm, responded Bratwurst.

Pix gently backed out of the hug, exhaling. "Yeah," he said, voice sounding much lighter now. "I'd say we're good."

Sausage nodded awkwardly. "So, are you going back in or..?"

"Are you?" asked Pix.

Sausage paused before nodding again.

"Alright," said Pixl, stepping backwards a pace and waiting for Sausage to follow him before turning around and heading back towards the tavern's large double doors. "I know you insisted that we would all get free drinks this evening, but I'm paying for mine-"

"Pix, please," said Sausage. "You really don't have to-"

"-but I'm paying for mine and that's final," Pix interrupted firmly. "If you won't accept it then I'm either handing it to Eddie or breaking into your house when you're out doing something and putting it into wherever you keep your money."

He looked back at Sausage, who understood that he either had to hand over the money or tell Pixl where his safe was, and it wasn't that he didn't trust Pix inside his house, but he didn't want any more trouble over this. "Okay."

"Thought so," said Pixl with a nod, opening the door and holding it for him.

"However," Sausage said as soon as the door closed shut behind the two of them, loudly in order to be heard over the resounding din, "you get a 50% discount and this is also non-negotiable."

Pixl's face fell a little and Sausage had to laugh. "Non-negotiable!" he crowed as he slipped behind the counter again. "I'm holding you to this, Pix!"

"Did you lose a bet?" asked Fwhip.

"You could say," answered Pix delicately. Joel looked at him questionably, but was silenced by Fwhip shaking his head.

"So," Fwhip said cheerfully and oddly smugly, effortlessly changing the subject. "Centaurs have six legs and are therefore insects. Discuss."

"Oh, you little," said Joel with a growl as everyone within a two meter radius immediately started shouting at Fwhip.

[withering-sunflower-dust]

You know, I'm thinking abt an empires au more specifically an actor au. I've seen a lot of different actor/behind the scenes aus which has very much dragged me into a rabbit hole for esmp/alsmp actor/behind the scene au

Sooo I'mma post something for it instead of letting it rot my brain!

Random interviewer; How do you take shots with your uhh, evil counter part?

Sausage's actor; oh Supreme?

Random interviewer; that's what you guys call him on set set? over here we call him Bratwurst

Sausage's actor; yea that's understandable, But to answer the question he's not actually green screened in

Random interviewer; really now?

Sausage actor; yea, I think the writers thought the plot would be perfect because I have a twin brother *points off screen*

Bratwurst's actor; sup!

Sausage actor; his voice is a lot different, he normally uses a voice changer on set

Random interviewer; I see!

_____

Interviewer; how did the writers come up with the ending for season 1?

Gem's actor; that's actually a really funny story!

Interviewer; how come?

Gem's actor; season 1 with an actually supposed to end like that we had an ending plant out for like months, but then one day I guess somebody broke havoc and then the sets kind of burnt down.. not entirely there were a lot of sets that were still okay to use like mythlands, The cod empire, and like some others but yeah that's kind of how we ended up with that ending for season 1

Interviewer; so we could've had a different ending?

Gem's actor; yes actually! Our original ending was actually..uhm.. how do I say this..okay I think our show would have actually been rated R if we had the original ending we planned

Interviewer; woah now!

Gem's actor; it's true! Even with the blood and things we have now on the show it's still only PG-13, but I think with that ending it would have definitely been rated R, {*Scott's actor*} was actually supposed to drop an f-bomb at the very end

_____

Interviewer;what are your opinions on the ships?

Scott's actor; uh, I love the ships the people drawing these pieces of art are so talented honestly

Interviewer; if I were to ask what's your favorite ship, what would it be personally for you?

Scott's actor; uuuh, oh that's a hard one, I would say the Jimmy and Scott ones. But, the sausage and Scott ones have a very special place in my heart

Interviewer; and why is that?

Scott's actor; I'm actually married to {*sausages actor name*} so like when I see these fan arts of these two characters that basically resemble us, it makes us feel so appreciated cuz we never thought the day would come where people would be drawing us in a physical relationship

Interviewer; wait, YOU'RE MARRIED?!

_____

Interviewer; if I can ask where did the concept of your season 2 skulk corruption come from?

Shelby's actor; uuh, personally I think it was inspired by sausages season 1 corruption I think it was supposed to be a continuation of that and with a closing space for it since this is our final season so we wanted to close off any kind of potholes and I think this was the perfect way to do it by getting my character corrupted and having {*sausages actor*} help my character out with this whole thing cuz that was like a whole friendship arc I never thought I would see but honestly watching it back I loved how it came out

Interviewer; I see! Well what do you think of the ships?

Shelby's actor; uh, season 2 nature's wife was actually {*sausages actor*} idea but we like went along with it, mind you this was before it was announced to the crew me and {*Katherine's actor*} was actually dating

Interviewer; that is truly amazing!

Shelby's actor; it is! Sometimes on set we joke about how {*sausage's actor*} actually has psychic abilities outside of his character

_____

Interviewer; who do you think were the most chaotic people while filming together was?

Joey's actor; uh, for season 1 I think {*fwhip's actor*} has explicitly answered this question in his YouTube Q&A on his channel, while just on set even if behind the scenes one of the most fun and chaotic people to be with is me and {*sausages actor*} we rock havoc on set

Interviewer; yea that makes sense

_____

Interviewer; a quick question before we continue with everything, who was playing Hermes?

Joel's actor; oh that's actually something I've wanted someone to ask

Interviewer; why is that?

Joel's actor; The Kid that was playing Hermes is actually {*sausage's actor*} Son well more like adopted son but same thing, the kid that played Hermes is actually {*Scott's actor*} and {*sausage's actor} son, so yeah that's actually really funny to think about, cuz both in cannon and real life Hermes is actually {*sausage's actor*} son in both realities

[suleikashideaway]

Why I Don't Write Zell Dincht 

On this mother's day, I find myself forced into thinking about motherhood and the impacts of motherhood on every human life. 

Much more rambling beneath the cut.

I think about motherhood a lot. Mainly because I am indeed a mother myself. However, being a mother was only a catalyst for me in understanding why my own mother was the way she was, and how that affected me. The way I have unlearned and learned how to mother is only a by-product of this.

Today, of course, it's all highlighted. The obligation. The memories. The fucking balloons in the grocery store. It's all so much more complicated than I ever imagined, and I doubt I will ever stop processing it so directly on this specific day every year. 

Luckily I’ve been processing it for long enough that it is no longer raw and painful and explosive. Now I can type coherent sentences and be genuinely okay with the amount of introspection the day still brings. 

And though today I am moved enough to write about it here, this analysis is constantly brought into my fanfic writing. I could argue that the influence of one's parents (or lack of influence or lack of parents) is the root of everything I write. Often it's hidden below the surface of my words, and often I don't recognize it's there until afterwards, but it's a profound fundamental influence nonetheless. 

Maybe that's why I've always been drawn to Final Fantasy VIII. The main cast are all orphans. Rinoa is the exception, but losing her mother at age five and having a terrible relationship with her father put her in a similar-enough category. So they're all ripe for that trauma of not having a sturdy parent-child relationship, especially in their early days. 

I have headcanons for all of these poor babies, all based on their early separation from their parents and why they turned out the way they did in their late teen years. Why Seifer wants to be a knight, why Selphie enjoys explosives, why Irvine is a secret sweetheart behind his macho facade, and why Quistis has a thirst to prove herself. I plan to write all of these as their own fics. 

Except for Zell! 

Why? Well, Zell is the only one who wound up with a reasonable mother. He was orphaned just like the rest of them, but something happened when Ma Dincht picked that little blonde tornado from the line-up. Something clicked in that little heart of his, and it's my biggest headcanon that Zell “Crybaby Chickenwuss” Dincht is the most emotionally well-adjusted of the whole lot. 

He's the one who's never been afraid to express himself. He's completely forthcoming with his intensity and his feelings. He's willing to let you see his true self. 

And though it seems cringe (or at least it did for me as a teenager), this authenticity is something those of us with poor parenting often struggle with. We were taught from day one that our cries, our anger, our enthusiasm is too much and should be stifled in order to save others the energy from having to deal with it. Instead, children should be blindly obedient, seen and not heard. 

Not so for our darling Zell! Ma Dincht saw a crybaby and thought, “I'll take him.” 

Of course, not everyone struggles with writing Zell because of this. See @angelosearch’s beautiful take on this in her fic: The Ballad of Ma Dincht. And for further reading about Zell’s earliest years, see @gardengalwrites's Boardwalk Bratwurst. 

So, on this complicated day, I find solace in the idea that there are Ma Dinchts out there. And if you struggle on this day, I hope you can take comfort in my ramblings and know that your authentic expression is valuable, and it's well worth the time to seek out those who are capable of receiving it with open arms. ❤️

[thedo0zyslider]

💝🌟 for anyone you wish

anyone I wish.....omg....

fwhip headcanons bc I've been thinking about him all week (empires s1 edition)

💝 A headcanon about their love language

His love language is gift giving. Specifically weird ass gifts that he makes himself. May or may not have the possibility to explode (he tells gem he handmade her birthday gift again and she gets flashbacks to the toy train he made when they were 15 that somehow blew up)

I think he could also be a quality time guy. He likes pestering people

🌟 A headcanon about their desires/wishes

hmm. Hard one. I think he (at least) wants to be Not Enemies with Jimmy. (Half convinced the "I hate cod" thing is a bit to fuck with him) Don't get me wrong they absolutely have moments where they dislike each other and than other times fwhips giving him diamonds and trying to get the codfather head back and warning him of bratwurst

Like sir I thought u hated him. Hello

Anyways I am done ty for ask <3

(Ask game here)

[regret-breathing]

[radio tuning static]

are you having a brat summer?

do you like this song?

then congrats!!

you like coke music.

no no no, dont be ashamed. coke music, much like coke, is great!! coke music is the only reason people like the eighties!! it was a horrible time, but the music fucks.

now, i know what youre saying. ‘but internet stranger, coke music is dead!! what am i supposed to do?? brat is all i have!!’

au contraire my little bratwurst. theres a whole world of coke music for you to explore. for instance, if you like brat, look no further than travis scott’s birds in the trap sing mcknight!!

specifically, if you like everything is romantic, you will certainly like this song!!

sdp interlude has the same vocal layering and elegant repetition, along with the bouncy club dance beat you crave!! it is primo coke music. in fact, im nearly certain it’s the song that inspired that particular track on brat!!

trap casts a long shadow over all of music as it exists today, and yet gets regularly ignored and insulted by the music industry it bears the heaviest load of, purely because like all of hip hop it comes from black culture!!

are you having a brat summer??

then listen to travis scott!! you will not be disappointed!!

[sugurusasks]

Geto husband + girl dad application because I said I’d do it and I did

Skills:

- Cooking only a few particular meals extremely well and nothing else (pozole w/beef, grilled cheese w/ fried ham and turkey, grilled beer bratwurst)

- Minimal sorcery (it’s all card tricks)

- Pinpoint accuracy when throwing a slipper

- Quick wit (only applicable in humorous situations)

- Identifying birds, aircraft, and constellations

- Teaching about obscure interests (see above)

- Small game hunting

- Telling the worst jokes imaginable

- Home improvement/construction work

Experience:

- Returning home with the milk (3-1/2 yrs)

- Telling godawful jokes (9 yrs)

- Rubbing Some Dirt In It™ (entire life)

- Making back and forth trips to hardware stores because I keep forgetting a specific tool (~2 yrs)

Misc attributes:

- strength disproportionate to size, able to lift and carry twice own weight, can pick up partner and children

- 101.2 Decibel sneeze

- Dad lore (present in every dad, will drop fragments of it at dinners without elaborating)

- Can’t stop saying “neato” unironically

- Preferred footwear is crocs

Thank u for your consideration <3

i did not think that you would submit an application, and after reading over it, i’m thoroughly impressed. i actually think you’d be incredibly entertaining to be around. consider yourself hired.

[leclerced]

https://www.tumblr.com/enchantecafe/738701264923328512/ive-been-thinking-recently-probably-because-of

Omg this made me laugh sm. So im german and i just imagined bringing lando with me to my grandma and he’s thinking „ok german food wont be a problem, schnitzel is great and bratwurst is also easy, i eat that at home“. His reaction when he sees a fucking mettigel for the first time, pure horror (you should google it). I imagine pulling him into a bathroom bc its kale season and he needs to help me wash 40kg (88lbs) kale in the bathtub and sees all the insects coming out of it? And how 8 full Bathtubs shrink down to 3 big pots??? He‘d faint if he were to witness germans yell at each other over the correct name of a Berliner (its berliner). Poor boy would be so confused about why asparagus season is taken so seriously here 😭

And the worst part, im from Wolfsburg (the home city of Volkswagen) and he has to sit there and listen to why the VW Ketchup has a serial number like the car parts at the factory or how there was a „ketchup gate“.

🫀

link

okay sorry i didn’t answer this when u sent it but ugh. i love this sooo much it made me laugh sm. i kept rereading it all day and giggling. god i want to go to germany so bad.

lando would walk in and see the mettigel and immediately be like, “oh fuck i have to eat that?” he’d panic internally soo bad until she shows him the foods he will eat, ones she specifically asked to be made so he wouldn’t starve. i can so imagine his gfs brothers or like the kids of the family teasing him with weird foods, like when carlos tried getting him to eat sushi!! lando’s politely declining and trying not to gag at the sight.

the kale thing is so fucking funny. 88 lbs of kale??? 8 full tubs of kale??? what are u cookin ?? who eats that much kale??? this sounds like one of those math problems where someone buys 78 bottles of soda and you have to determine the final cost with tax.

all that kale and it all shrinks down to 3 big pots???? oh my fucking god thats insane!!!!!!!! lando would not be eating it after he sees all the bugs. he would never eat kale again because he knows bugs have been on it before. he gets served a sandwich with kale on it at a restaurant and can’t eat it because it has been touched by a bug.

i like asparagus when its grilled or sautéed but at thanksgiving this year my grandma made creamed asparagus with canned asparagus and it was genuinely the worst thing i have eaten in years but it was the only side and i felt bad about only eating ham and rolls. i could go on n on about that but i will not rn unless u all want to hear ab my holiday shenanigans but i assume yall prob don’t care to hear me complain ab the menu at family dinner.

its so so cool ur from where vw is from!! u could take him on a tour of the factory and stuff i think he’d like that a lot!! take him w the whole fam and everyone is telling him ab the lore

i’m from the town where dr pepper was invented humble brag!!! there is a museum in an old bottling factory and you can go and make your own soda its sooo cool. i haven’t been since i was a kid but i love it. there’s another museum there with this mammoth exhibit, i can’t remember if these are cast replicas or if they excavated some, but there’s a display in the museum and you get to walk on top of it on this glass floor and its absolutely incredible. look at this!!!! i used to sit and analyze these fossils for as long as i could. there’s also the mammoth monument you can visit where they discovered the mammoths!! you can read about it here if ur a nerd like me

[dreamtrip2030]

Discover the Enchanting Beauty of Germany 🇩🇪 Germany, a land of rich history, stunning landscapes, and vibrant culture, offers an unforgettable experience for every traveler. From the bustling metropolis of Berlin to the charming Bavarian Alps, there's something to captivate everyone. Immerse Yourself in History and Culture 🏛️

Berlin: Explore the remnants of the Berlin Wall, visit iconic landmarks like the Brandenburg Gate, and indulge in the city's thriving art scene.

Munich: Experience the Bavarian charm with its lively beer gardens, majestic castles like Neuschwanstein, and the annual Oktoberfest celebration.

Cologne: Discover the iconic Cologne Cathedral, a masterpiece of Gothic architecture, and enjoy a boat cruise on the Rhine River.

Explore Stunning Natural Landscapes 🌲

Black Forest: Hike through lush forests, visit charming villages, and indulge in delicious Black Forest cake.

Bavarian Alps: Enjoy breathtaking mountain views, go skiing or hiking, and relax in traditional alpine chalets.

Rhine Valley: Cruise along the Rhine River, admiring picturesque castles and vineyards, and savor local wines.

Indulge in German Cuisine 🍻

Savor traditional dishes: Enjoy hearty meals like sauerbraten, schnitzel, and bratwurst, accompanied by a refreshing beer.

Experience local markets: Discover fresh produce, artisanal cheeses, and delicious pastries at vibrant farmers' markets.

Indulge in sweet treats: Treat yourself to Black Forest cake, apple strudel, or pretzels.

Practical Tips for Your Trip ✈️

Best time to visit: Spring (April-May) and autumn (September-October) offer pleasant weather and fewer crowds.

Transportation: Germany has an excellent public transportation system, including trains, buses, and trams.

Language: While English is widely spoken, learning basic German phrases can enhance your experience.

Currency: The Euro is the official currency. Germany is a country that will leave you enchanted with its diverse landscapes, rich history, and warm hospitality. Start planning your dream trip today! Would you like to focus on a specific region or interest?

https://www.youtube.com/@dreamtrip2030ma

#travel#world#Germany#Munich#Berlin#Frankfurt#Europe

[happigreens]

Many of my homecooked meals lately have been vegan or plant based and with locally-sourced ingredients! :-)

Ive made homemade eggdrop soup using backyard eggs and kale from the city market, for instance. Ive been using that kale for many meals. Also zucchini and squash and locally made siopao from Filipino markets. Very good stuff!

(Left to right: homemade eggdrop soup w mushrooms, kale, and backyard eggs from a local farmer; steamed zucchini and squash from the city market and local chicken siopao with rice; Beyond Meat bratwurst and steamed kale from the market on ricebed).

My next goal is to buy some animal products from local (and preferably black and brown) farmers with humane practices for the animals. While I probably wont go back vegan again, the 5 or 6 yrs of being vegan in some of my formal yrs rlly changed my palate for the better. So i dont rlly crave meat as much anymore, and when I do, its cuz I know its a desire for unami flavors and certain textures of food, not meat specifically. That to say I will find such animal farmers for the bit of meat and animals products to supplement a mostly plant based diet I want to curate.

I just bought a nice blender from GoodWill, so I'm excited to start making homemade smoothies with the produce I get from the local market! I stay on the lookout at supermarket chains for cheap yogurt by remembering their sell-by dates since theyyre so perishible and going back to the store to take advantage of their discounts. I currently have almost a pint of unflavored, unsweetened almond milk yogurt to use so I'm really exited to start experimenting with my (relatively) new blender!

[thelastspeecher]

decided just now on a whim that Stan Pines can grill a mean bratwurst

not hot dog

bratwurst specifically