#specially since you get obliterated at the end either way
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purpledemonlilyposting · 2 months ago
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You had us in the first half Lily but you snatched failure from the jaws of victory and came through with being astoundingly wrong.
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[Lily's Post]
Lily is right in the first part. The Grey Wardens aren't uniters or bringers of peace. They fight Darkspawn and the Blight. That's it. Blights happen once every few centuries when an Archdemon dragon appears leading a horde of Darkspawn. Grey Wardens are literally the only people who can end a Blight as far as anyone knows.
The reason being is an Archdemon can just resurrect when killed by leaping into a nearby Darkspawn and reforming. Because the Darkspawn are mindless, souless manifestations of the Blight (and we found out exactly why in Veilguard. It was a lore reveal I didn't see coming but made perfect sense.)
But when a Grey Warden kills an Archdemon because they carry the Blight in them the old god soul in the Archdemon leaps into THEM and both the soul and the Warden are obliterated.
Did you actually finish Origins, Lily? You learn this fact in the final hours from Riordan. Alistair and the Hero of Ferelden have no clue why only Grey Wardens can stop the Blight up to that point because they're literally new recruits.
"There is no such thing as morality among the Wardens. Many of them are former criminals, and they'd use blood magic or something even worse to stop the Blight."
They literally did use blood magic, Lily. What do you think the Joining ritual is? They use lyirum and Archdemon blood to turn someone into a Warden. If you survive the Joining you have about 30 years until the Blight takes you completely.
So it's either that or Thedas is just exactly like it was during the First Blight, which lasted for 200 years.
"Their soldiers are conscripted"
Not always. You only paid attention to the City Elf Origin. A Dalish Elf is already Blighted from an eluvian in some ancient elven ruins, only the Joining can save their life. A Human Noble volunteers after their family is betrayed and killed. A Dwarf Commoner or Noble is basically out of options in their respective storylines and volunteers to seek asylum. Circle of Magi Origin is basically conscripted by Duncan to get them out of the trouble Jowan gets them into.
Either way Lily, duh, the main character has to become a Grey Warden somehow or there isn't a plot.
Wardens will take anyone, from anywhere, criminals, murderers and all because their primary motive is to fight the Blight. Plenty of people find purpose and meaning for the first time in their lives with the Wardens.
".A guy tries to leave the Joining, and Duncan straight up murders him."
Yeah Lily. ALMOST LIKE IT'S A DARK FANTASY SERIES. Thedas is a brutal place. You can ask Duncan about it later and he says it brought him no pleasure to kill Ser Jory, but the details of the Joining must be kept a secret.
If you're curious can see the mood of the scene where Duncan kills Ser Jory for yourself since I streamed all three games and don't skip or talk over cutscenes.
And lastly
"and kept on a leash with special tracking magic."
No Lily that's not Grey Wardens that's Circle Mages. Circle Mages have phylacteries. All Grey Wardens get is horrible dreams of the Archdemon shrieking in their minds as it controls the Darkspawn hordes like a hivemind. They can sense each other in close proximity like they can sense Darkspawn (cause they can detect the presence of the Blight in someone) but that's it.
You will see as the games go on that the Blight can do that. Anything infected with the Blight can be controlled. There's a reason the Archdemon can do this, we had it completely confirmed in Veilguard.
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jmdbjk · 5 months ago
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Thinking too hard.
I was having a delusional episode while talking to my bestie:
Here's my wild concept for the BTS comeback MV: a Star Wars-like spoof where they are the rebel underdogs fighting the evil empire.
The song would need to have an overall "together we will overcome and save the world" theme. Or it could be a "fuck you evil bitches time to die". Either/or.
They are in those X-wing fighters and those huge land walker thingys.
Jimin can have smeraldo flower decals on his X-wing and JK can have tattoo graffiti looking decals on his. Of course both of their light sabers would be purple. Duh, right? It gets hot in those fighter space craft, they'd be shirtless of course.
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Tae can be riding one of those two-legged horse/kangaroo looking things, wind blowing in his hair. Hey, I just googled what they are called... Tauntauns... tan tans? The universe is universing here. Stick with me, I might be on to something.
Yoongi can be operating one of those land stompers. Googled what those are called (can you tell I'm not a hardcore Star Wars fan? But I did see most of the theatrical movies, except maybe one... anyway) All Terrain Armored Transport or AT-AT Walker because at one point in Yoongi's life, he worked as a motorbike delivery person. Universe, stop it! While delivering more troops and weapons to the front lines, Yoongi can crush people who look like k-media and fake media... or MHJ. For sure kpoppies. Crush 'em all, Yoongi.
I don't want to say it but its a no-brainer: Namjoon is a wise and philosophical ancient being who can slice an enemy in half using only his words. May the force be with you. Slash.
That leaves Hobi. He's the commander of course. Perfectly fitting uniform (designed by LV of course) manning the war room.
Jin, since he's the oldest and the most hardcore gamer, would volunteer to be the one to fly into the heart of the evil empire's ship/vessel/planet/egg/brain/bowels/whatever and blow it to bits before he zooms out safely, escaping obliteration. I guess that would also lend itself to having a slight astronaut touch to it wouldn't it? Kinda also ties in with military stuff.
Cue the close up of Jin winking to the camera and blowing a WWH kiss.
At the end of the MV the evil in the world is destroyed and everyone cheers. The whales in the ocean rejoice.
A bit violent but in a sci-fi fantasy way. Hybe can spend a lot of money on special effects and make it very sparkly and over the top cinematic.
At least you can’t say I don’t have a sense of humor along with this wild imagination.
Time to exit the emo angst school boi era and enter the mature hunk oppa hero era guys. Universe! Get on it!
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e-ngel · 2 months ago
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𝐸𝓃𝑔𝑒𝓁
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Pronouns: He/Him Birthday: Unknown (1000+) Species: First Warlock Alliance: Evil - The Bad GuysTM Location: Inside the dome
So What Happened?
Don't you just love it when a plan comes together? Well, Engel does too. In this whole mess, he's been following his own agenda-- one that far pre-dates this 'supernatural revolution' Frederick and Edward are so hell-bent on. Engel might be the First Warlock, infinitely powerful, but... there are still limitations. His former Coven made sure of it (damned 'laws of nature', give him a break). Fret not, Engel has a plan.
But let's rewind a sec to Havensdale High's prom night. Engel had given Juliette Palmer (a powerful family with a Warlock side) a power boost before-- one or twice, or more. She had potential, but when she came storming into his space that night, he knew things were different. If it hadn't been such a delightful surprise, he might have had to kill her for draining his power... uninvited. The results were too good, so he let it go. She caused a storm; vengefully murdered and continues to torture and chase power to this day. What more could you want in a protégée?
A few days after Prom, Engel appears in the hospital room of Evelyn Prescott (deeply disappointed in her actions). He makes her an offer-- he'll remove the curse (a great one! If either Prescott sister falls in love and they're loved in return, the object of their affection dies. See: Mark Morrison) from Eleanor Prescott if she turns off her humanity. If she becomes a Warlock. Yet another exciting win for Engel's personal agenda!
As mentioned, D-Day (Founder's Festival) had been a long, long, time coming. First, Original vampires and werewolves had to set aside their petty differences, it had to be the right time, in the right town. The spells had to be cast and broken one at a time: vampires, werewolves, shifters, witches, bloodline hunters and, of course, humans. They needed to all gather here, he needed their blood. The ‘human day’ spell was the biggest that had happened in centuries-- something that should have been impossible, made possible.
Engel had been there in the beginning when their Coven gathered around that accursed tree in Havensdale Valley and protected the humans by weakening the supernatural. Stakes, silver, blessed waters-- all of it. It took a thousand lifetimes to find that tree again, to break its power. The Dome was played as intentional while they gathered their forces--- the Dome was necessary for Engel to fully break that tree they had once poured so much power into. A representative of nature, of balance, of the damned limitations put on his power. He should have known it wouldn’t be that easy.
So yes, on D-Day, Engel deeply wounded the tree, releasing the power he needed to create the dome and undo the weaknesses of the supernaturals. He was on the brink of everything-- the height of his power-- when he blinked and the tree was gone. Almost three years in this town and Engel knows the barrier around the town is starting to lessen, that his power is starting to lessen. He needs to find the tree again and obliterate it. There will be no 'laws of nature', only him.
Back in Havensdale, another win for Engel came in the form of Dexter Harrison also turning off their humanity- pathetic reasons- but a win is a win. Engel had been chipping away at this for a long time, since Dexter was a wee baby-- since they were but an idea in the universe. Engel had mentored and given power to Dexter's father with the future in mind. We love to see an end result! It’s called playing the long game.
All in all, Engel is the fun, floaty, weird uncle(tm) at Montgomery Manor with spooky little charms and mysterious locked rooms. Engel seems like he’s just chilling, but he’s got plans on plans on plans. (A special shout out to the creepy set of Oracle Eyes he carries that no one looks directly at or talks about).
To recap and conclude: Engel is plotting the best way to get what he wants, to find that damn tree, to unleash his full potential and power. No matter how long it takes...
Wanted Connections
tba
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purrgiri · 13 days ago
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My own personal take on why he could be interested in someone or why he wouldn't be starting with oz
Ozma and him are kind of similar sacrificed for a duty they didn't understand nor truly want and made immortal condemned for all time watching over a world that hadn't been theirs for a long time i think he'd sympathise with ozma maybe Enough to grant him his mark so he'd finally have the power he needs to finish salem off once and for all
But at the same time he might not want to since oz already very mighty in his own right and has no aspirations beyond killing Salem he'd probably just off her and then himself
Kinda boring there is no moral intrigue or struggle beyond the physical there is no struggle of morality since ozma already has power beyond the common man and has rejected abusing that again and again and he will reject the idea a fourth time there is nothing entertaining here
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Ironwood would Probably not be marked he is by all accounts a hammer
Give him god like magic and he'd smash the problem head on nothing interesting nothing entertaining especially if he still ends up spiraling
There isn't much special about giving him the mark He's just another high chaos marked waiting to happen you don't need future sight to know that for that reason i don't see him getting a mark or even having the outsider attention because there is nothing interesting about giving him one
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Qrow definitely is a strong candidate he is the corvo of the RWBY verse the similarities would definitely get the outsider attention i think he'd consider marking him but probably quickly get bored with the idea since qrow is not very likely to do anything insanely interesting with that power
Much like ozma he might not get the power because it would be to boring with such an obvious result
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Now raven is the strongest candidate in my opinion for a few reasons
First of all let's be real the outsider has a talent for giving power to murder hobos who end up abusing it (we know of like 10 marked and only two of them didn't murder hundreds of people) he claims to be bored with high chaos but he marks lots of mass murderers
Second of all i think the mark on raven would be intriguing to the outsider because of how much of a canon ball it is for the reasoning she has for what she does
"salem is big scary and immortal" crumbles as a excuse to run away from her problems when she absolutely can kill her
So now given the power to change the fate of remnant and the absolute obliteration of her excuses what shall she do?
Put an end to salem and return to the woods?
Run to her family and beg for forgiveness?
Would she stick to what she always did stay a bandit and help no one but herself?
Either way i have a feeling the outsider would be watching that story unfold with great interest
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"i am the outsider and this is my mark"
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moodymisty · 2 years ago
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Okay so I know that you talked about the Crosshair fic you plan to work on, HOWEVER, I saw your kinks request list and my mind in in full gear now.
So I raise you with Crosshair being so overstimulated by the reader that he begs them to stop or at the very least slow down. Do you understand the kind of power that can hold over me? How fucking useless I am just staring into space and sighing dreamily at this idea? I blame you wholeheartedly because now I’m stuck looking at a wall and not getting anything done
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Authors note: I just want you to know, where ever you are in the world, you and I are on the same wavelength. I hear you, I see you, I feel you.
So my current ✧・゚: Crossy ✧・゚ ; WIP is very similar in regards to just completely obliterating Crosshair. But, I had another similar idea that I decided to put here, since it burst forth from me with little to no warning. Seems to be a theme. This fic also made me realize that half of my blog is just, sucking clone dick. Ummmm, oops? I swear I have non-blowjob content coming( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) soon.
Relationships: Crosshair/GN!Reader
Warnings: NSFW, Oral(male receiving), Voyeurism, Overstimulation, Crosshair shooting his rifle at a range,
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"I'm bored."
Crosshair doesn't bother looking your direction, feeling the way your tone tells him everything. He knows you're watching him from behind with your arms crossed, there's no need for him to see.
"Then find something to keep yourself busy."
Of course he'd say that, as if he wasn't the one who'd dragged you out here to begin with. You use the term 'dragged' loosely however, as you were the one who had wanted to spend some time with him, and this was how it had ended up.
The long range shooting gallery was used far less than the normal one, given that sniper training was a special skill set that not every clone utilized constantly. And as such it was completely empty today, other than you and Crosshair.
He prefers it this way, meanwhile you find it incredibly boring.
There wasn't even anyone else to talk to, since Crosshair failed to make an entertaining conversation while he was too busy boring holes into a target plate. If there was a reg here you might've attempted to make him jealous for some sort of entertainment, even if it had the chance of backfiring horribly.
Walking forward across the room, you move to lean against the small divider that separates one shooting lane from another. He glances to the side at you for a moment, but ultimately doesn't comment. You don't either, until you notice the way his brow furrows; Intensely concentrated on something that for him, doesn't really require too much effort.
"Awfully focused, isn't this stuff just a joke for you?" He fires another shot, furthering his attempt at making something out of the blaster holes. You can't quite tell what it is yet, though he only started recently.
"You are really full of incredible commentary today, aren't you?"
“As always.” You scoff. Your eyes slowly travel down his arms and to his hands, seeing the way his hands wrap around his rifle. Compared to his brothers and the regs Crosshair is remarkably lithe, seeing the way his fingers move from years of muscle memory and intense focus. He was quite literally born for this, and takes every single shot no matter how easy as serious as he would if it was real.
You wonder what it would take for him to lose that focus, since he seems so damn insistent on boring you near or to death.
Glancing downward even further you notice the space between the walls of the shooting lane and his legs, hidden and mostly out of view. It gives you an idea; One that's strong enough to have you quickly on your knees, squeezing down to get into the hidden area shadowed by the table his rifle rests on. Needless to say Crosshair instantly notices, and leans back just enough to look at you down there.
"And what exactly are you doing?" It takes you a moment to figure out what you need to pull it in order to remove his armor, not looking up as your fingers feel around his hips.
"Finding something to keep me busy. Like you said." Managing to figure out the complex and unintuitive way to get the offending piece of armor off, you hear him take another shot with his rifle; Leaning forward into proper form again. He didn't even object to it, nor did he attempt to care.
Well, if he's going to just act like he isn't bothered, you'll take the whole thing as a challenge then.
The groin seam of a GAR sanctioned body glove is easy to use, something you’ve never really been thankful for until now. Your hand slips between the fabric, gently pulling out his cock from where it laid against his thigh.
Licking your palm from wrist to fingertip your wrap your hand around his cock and slowly move back and forth, feeling him twitch against your palm. He doesn’t audibly react that you notice, nor any other way than just a slight adjustment of his stance.
But his cock is already half hard so you know he’s affected by it, leaning forward to blow air gently against the tip. Adjusting on your knees you lean your head forward just enough to press your lips against his tip, dragging them down the side of his cock all the way to the base.
The sound of metal on metal clanking you assume is because he's messing with a piece of his rifle, while you drag your lips back to the tip of his cock and slowly wrap your mouth around him.
He fires another shot as your tongue laps against the large vein on the underside of his cock, your hands gripping at the armor on his thighs to hold yourself steady. He adjusts his stance again, forcing your body to follow just a tad. While he may seem unaffected, you'd say you know Crosshair quiet well; Enough so that he isn't actually all that subtle, you just need to know what to look for. His one foot is fidgeting, and he's standing more ridged than normal.
"You best be hoping no one else decides to practice today." No one will; Out of all the times you've been in here, you've maybe seen a handful of regs.
Despite his best efforts however you notice the way his voice sounds almost strained, feeling the way your lips gently wrap around his cock while the taste of precum hits your tastebuds. Moaning around him you adjust on your knees, moving to wrap a hand around the base of his cock that your mouth can't reach without him almost hitting your throat.
You think he grumbles something but it's too muffled for you to hear, and your mouth is too full to try and ask him what he said. It was probably some sort of angry mumble at you doing this to him, feeling your touch become harder, faster. Your hand pumps him faster with the rhythm of your bobbing head, glancing up to see the way he's still leaning over onto the tabletop.
It's been awhile since you've heard his rifle; He hasn't fired a shot for a considerable amount of time.
Pulling your mouth off his cock for a moment to take a deep breath of air, you quickly wrap your lips around him again bobbing your head and listening to the way he lets out an audibly surprised sound.
"K-kriff," Suddenly you feel his hand on your head, attempting to push you back but with little to no avail. You keep going, only emboldened by the way he's finally cracked.
"You gotta cool it down there." You have no plans to do any such thing, taking him as deeply into your mouth as you can while your hand grips at the plates of his armor. It makes spit pool in your mouth as he presses against the back of your tongue, but the way he almost crumples as you moan around him is well worth it.
"Seriously, you gotta-" He hisses through gritted teeth, hearing the sound of his rifle's stand wobble on the rest. His legs are noticeably less stable, and his body is leaned forward, supporting himself by putting his forearms on the table. You can hear the way he's clearing his throat and attempting not to moan, having completely abandoned any further attempts to shoot. He can't handle the way your tongue presses against his cock, feeling you moan with each movement of your head; Mouth completely full.
He lets out a loud, almost hiss-like groan, clearly muffled by a clenched fist as his hips suddenly thrust forward in the direction of your mouth.
“Kriff, slow down,”
He can’t keep up the unaffected ploy anymore, holding the edge of the table with a death drip.
You hear his first slam on the table multiple times, and it's more than fair to assume he's completely overwhelmed, desperately seeking more as his cock throbs in your mouth.
The motion makes his helmet topple to the ground, rolling across the floor until it stops a short ways away.
His one leg is bent a little almost buckling underneath him, feeling the way your mouth is almost suffocatingly hot around him. He swears loudly, cutting himself off by gritting his teeth. Now he's the one hoping no one will want to practice here tonight, as he'd rather do a million other things than be caught like this as you suck him off.
Hearing him helplessly groan he can't handle anymore of you and suddenly finishes in your mouth, hands flexing as he grips the edge of the table tight as he can without breaking it. He feels the way your mouth wraps around him, moving as you swallow and his hips jerk forward attempting to press deeper. You have to pull back enough to swallow, hearing his ragged breathing.
A small bit of spit trails down the corners of your mouth, and you slowly, teasingly pull your lips off his cock before wiping your mouth. Now free from your torture Crosshair leans back upright and looks down, spotting you.
It's the first time you've seen his face in a bit, and you can clearly see how warm it is, as well as the way his brow is furrowed; Refusing to make full eye contact with you.
"Are you done?" He says, glancing down at you for a moment and seeing the way you lick your lips.
"Are you?" It almost makes you laugh the way he visibly bristles, adjusting himself and his armor back into place before all but slamming his rifle into it's case and snapping the latches closed.
Getting up off of your knees Crosshair grasps your wrist and nearly starts dragging you, forcing you to have to trot in order to keep up. You can still see his face from his nose to the tips of his ears are flushed, his lips pursed tight. Of course now however a few unfortunate regs decided to step right in his way as you walk into the hallway, and Crosshair slams shoulders with one on the way out.
"Sorry!" Is the only thing you can yell over your shoulder before they're out of eyesight, all confused about what had just happened. You turn back to Crosshair and look at him, raising your eyebrows.
"Soooo, am I in trouble?" The look he gives you could cut durasteel.
Yeah, you're in trouble.
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stargazer-balladeer · 4 years ago
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S/o’s birthday but locks themselves in their rooms because they don’t feel special [Genshin Impact]
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Characters Included: Aether, Childe, Diluc, Kaeya & Venti.
Notes: Ayeeee! Since it’s my birthday today, why not make this? :))) I actually got carried away 🥲 this is around 3.5k words in total. Hope ya’ll like this!
Reader’s Gender: Neutral (tho i think there’s a slight implied female hehe…)
Warning: probably some swear words here and there knowing me- and mild suggestive themes in kaeya’s part 
[albedo, scaramouche, xiao]
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Aether remembers your birthday more than he knows his- like srsly, he’s the kind that remembers his s/o’s bday more than his. He’s also the kind that celebrates it privately unless you want to celebrate it with others, which he doesn’t mind. He might have a hard time deciding what kind of gift you want, but sooner or later, he already has one (or multiples bc he can’t decide-). 
Imagine his confusion when your day finally arrives but he can’t find you anywhere, even Paimon, who was excited to celebrate your bday (“oohh~ I can’t wait to eat the cake!” - Paimon), seems confused. Probably the culprit in planting worry in the travellers head as she jumps to conclusion that you might’ve been kidnapped. 
Luckily, he checked your house before he could report it to the knights of Favonius or the Qixing (like any normal person should do really-). When he received no reply, he takes out the spare key you gave him and entered your house, an invasion of privacy he knows but it's an emergency- 
Knowing that you’re in your room when he can’t find you downstairs, he knocks on your bedroom door softly while calling your name. Imagine his (and Paimon’s) relief when the door cracked open. Immediately engulfing you into a hug, he lets out a sigh of relief. He then proceeds to ask you what you were doing inside your room when it’s your birthday. His heart literally broke when you stated your reason. Tightening his hold around your figure, he smiles bitterly, knowing that feeling all too well..
“That’s not true. None of that stuff is true. Everyone deserves to feel special on their birthday, most especially you. We’ve brought some food, and cake of course. Also some gifts from other people. If you want, do you want to celebrate it with just the two, or rather three, of us?”
You, who was a literal angel in his eyes deserve the world. He honestly wants to find whoever put that idea in your head but that was reserved for another moment. For now, his main priority is your happiness. Guiding you downstairs where Paimon was (she left when aether hugged you, knowing you two needed privacy. also the cAKE-), he watches as your eyes sparkle at the sight of the cake. 
Grinning softly he made sure you had fun with your birthday. Even though it would be more fun with more people, it feels more special if it’s celebrated with just the two of you. Staring you with pure adoration as you laughed merrily at the sight of Paimon stuffing herself with food. He couldn’t help himself but lean forward to place a kiss on your forehead and then on your lips, leaning back with a smile on his face. 
“Happy birthday, my love. May many more to come. Maybe next time, we can invite other people. Though I don’t mind if we’ll celebrate it with just the two of us only-” And Paimon! Don’t forget about Paimon!” “Yes yes. And Paimon.”
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Similar to Aether, he would most definitely remember your birthday. After all, it holds a special place in his heart, alongside his family. And since this boi is rich af, he would most definitely try to spoil you on your birthday. Piles of expensive (or just cheap yet meaningful) gifts, reservation to a high-class restaurant in Liyue Harbor, and all that glamour. 
Actually, he didn’t find it odd that he didn’t see you immediately, thinking that you overslept or just relaxing in your house. But he soon finds it weird when it’s already around 3 in the afternoon and no sign of your face in the crowd, something he raised a brow at but shrugged it off. It isn’t until it’s almost the time of the reservation he made when he finally realized what’s going on. 
When he arrived at your house, dressed in a suit similar to Zhongli except it’s entirely black and white, waiting for you to come out. After a couple of minutes, he soon got concerned and decided to enter your bedroom through the window (pls do not do this at home). Startled at the sudden appearance of your handsome yet cheeky boyfriend, he stares at you with eyes asking the questions he didn’t dare to tell. 
Knowing he will get his answer one way or another, you decided to tell him about your dilemma. After you finished explaining yourself, silence surrounds you, which is quite worrisome since your boyfriend is known for his rather talkative behavior. Blinking in surprise at the sudden embrace of the 11th Harbinger, his hug was rather tight but not too tight that it cuts your oxygen. Speaking in a low, faint voice, a surprising feat for him, you can make out what he said as clear as day. 
“I’m sorry. I should’ve noticed it sooner. I was trying to be a perfect boyfriend for you but I guess I failed in that aspect. You know, if you feel like you aren’t special enough to celebrate your birthday, then what about me? Me who stained his hands with the red blood of his enemies, always engaging in a fight, clashing with other blades. Insecurity is really an asshole huh? Let me make it up to you now. Let’s not anymore go to that stupid high-class restaurant, c’mon, up you go. You better dressed comfortably when I come back or else…”
Leaving you quickly before coming back immediately, this time in more comfortable clothing rather than the stiff suit he wore earlier. This time as well, he entered your house normally through the door. In his arms, he was holding a bunch of stuff and proceeded to dump it on the living room table. It was different kinds of movies in different genres, you spotted some of your favorite movies in them (makes you also wonder where he got these from since you don’t remember seeing these in the room he stays-).
He would suggest making a pillow fort, and while making the pillow fort, he proceeded to smack you with one. Which ensued a pillow fight between you two. It successfully made the both of you a laughing mess by the end, filled with feathers. Childe then carries you bridal style to the incomplete pillow fort and starts the movie you chose. Placing you in his lap and placing his head either on your shoulder or head depending on your height, cuddling you from behind tightly with a contented smile on his face. 
“You know what? This might not be how I envisioned how your birthday would go, but I’m not complaining. Happy birthday, comrade. My most adorable and most cutest and only love. I love you so much that you’ll be the very reason why I die so suddenly. So stop being so cute okay?” 
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(You two are living together in this one.)
Diluc has the probability of forgetting your birthday due to his busy schedule, especially if it’s starting to rise when your birthday draws near. He might neglect you for a couple of days, too engrossed in his work. When the day finally arrives, it completely leaves his mind. Like he’ll think of it as a completely ordinary working day. It isn’t until one of your friends told him to send you their birthday greetings that he remembered. And oh boy does he feel guilty, like srsly, he literally froze when he realizes what day it is today. And you know what that means? ✨Panicc✨
Honestly, I can see him buying the whole store XD. In the state of panic, his common sense just leaves him completely that he ends us buying practically the whole store. It would be sent to the Dawn Winery immediately as he buys some flowers from Flora, who also sent you her birthday greetings, which made him more guilty-
When Diluc steps foot inside the manor, he tries to search for you outside the gardens where he usually finds you but when he doesn't, he gets worried. Asking the head maid immediately about your whereabouts, and his concern and worry (and guilt) grew even more when he finds out that you haven’t gone out of your room. He quickly went to your shared room, with the flowers still in his hands, and knocked on your door. Calling your name softly and asking for permission to enter, when granted he entered the room as quickly as possible. But seeing the sight of you bundled up in your blanket made his heart crack.
Placing the flowers at the bedside table, he quickly made his way in front of you and kneeled down to meet your eye level. You can tell he was very worried about you with how frantic his eyes seem and the concern underlying it. With the way he was staring at you, you can’t help but spill your insecurity to him. The reason why you were hiding in his room rather than go out to celebrate your day of birth. Every word you spill made his heart break even more. Seeing tears started to leak from your eyes, he placed his two hands on your face wiping away the tears with his thumbs. Smiling at you gently and placing a kiss on your eyelids and on your nose.
“I completely understand, my love. Even I sometimes feel that way. Also to the point where I don’t want to celebrate my birthday even, but that won’t do my love. You are so special, you deserve your special day to be well special. If you want to simply lay here and sleep, then so be it. If you want to go out and do something, then I’ll happily oblige. Let’s obliterate those awful thoughts, and if those keep persisting, I’ll slice them up for you. I’ll keep picking you up when you fall. So, what is your command, my love?” (i'm so tempted for him to say master-)
Whatever your answer may be, one thing for sure, Diluc is seen smiling adoringly at you. Even the maids noted how soft the master is around you, particularly today. Whether curled up together in the bed, with him embracing you tightly to his chest and placing a kiss on top of your head. And if you listen carefully, you can hear him quietly humming a tune that his father (or mother) sang to him. Or you two outside in the garden, simply admiring the view with his hand around your waist. 
Either way, at the end of the day, he would wake you up or make you go inside for dinner. You haven’t eaten breakfast or lunch yet so you’re probably hungry by now. If you don’t want to leave your room or want to return to your room, he would understand and make the maids bring the food to you. When the maid(s) finally arrives with the food, you notice the cake on the tray. Looking at him as he chuckles, taking the trays from the maids. Humming a light tune, he scoops a spoonful of cake and holds it to your mouth, with a slight smirk on his face, eyes twinkling with mischief. 
“Stop staring at me like that, did you really think I would let the day go by for you to not celebrate your birthday properly? From what I know, birthdays have cakes in them, whether a huge cake or a cupcake. Say ‘ahh’~... Happy birthday my love. May next year be more enjoyable than now.”
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Kaeya remembers your birthday like the back of his hand, I think he’s even more excited than you really. Eagerly awaiting your birthday as he counts down the days, dropping hints and stuff to you birthday-related, and probably plans a birthday party for you. The knights immediately agreed on it, including a certain bard, traveler, and wine master (albeit more hesitantly). He made sure that this party would be successful, constantly checking on the plans and such. To the point that everyone was practically fed up with his constant questions. But they understand that he wants this to be a successful and enjoyable party for you. It got to the point where Diluc kicked him out of his Tavern after asking for the umpteenth time. 
When your day finally arrives, he was practically beaming with joy and excitement. To the point where he can’t hide it behind the cool and suave facade he wears. He quickly made his way to you, going along with the plan of distracting you as they started to prepare for the party. In his total excitement, he didn’t notice the rather gloomy atmosphere around the house. But when he arrived at your door, that is when he noticed how quiet your house is.
Now albeit worried, his excited smile slipping from his face and now replaced with a worried frown, he knocked on your door, calling you in his usual teasing voice. When he didn’t hear your response, the bubble of anxiety appeared in his body. Twisting the knob and finding it unlocked, he quietly and carefully opened the door. Seeing your back immediately, seeing your side rise and fall making him sigh in relief that you were still alive. Closing the door gently but made a noise to alert you of his presence. Taking a seat behind you, he ran his cold fingers on your back, watching you arching at the sudden coldness of his fingers. Smiling slightly, he asked what’s wrong. 
Turning around to face him, you buried your face on his chest, inhaling his strong masculine scent. Instinctively wrapping his arms around you, he played with your hair with one of his hands. Tapping on your head slightly, beckoning for you to answer his question. With no way out, you decided to come clean. You explain how you feel like you don’t feel like you deserve to be treated as special on your birthday and all that sort. His face was void of emotion as he stared at the ceiling with his unique pair of blue eyes. Outside he might seem emotionless. But inside, he was on the brink of insanity. Who dares to put such an idea on his s/o’s mind? Why would you think of that? Was this insecurity of yours also his fault?
“That must be the most stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. You’re not special? Please. Don’t try to make me laugh with that joke ‘cause it’s not funny. You are a jewel, a star, a constellation. As rare as the gems, or rather visions. You can even rival the very sun with your smile. I know those demons in your head keep saying those words to you, the temptation is so tempting, right? Just succumbing to them to make them quiet. But that’s why I’m here, my dearest snowflake. I’m here for you. You’re so special to everyone, most especially to me. You mean the world to me. Anyway, enough of this tear-jerking stuff, we have a party to celebrate. And we can’t celebrate it without the birthday gal/guy now can we?”
Despite your protests, he lifted you effortlessly and carried you outside and into the dawn winery where the party was held. Placing you on the ground and pushing you forward where people from Mondstadt came and greeted you with happy birthdays. Smiling at the sight of you being overwhelmed at the warm greetings, and then chuckling at how bright your face became. Diluc nudges him to you, beckoning him to help you before returning to what he was previously doing (most likely trying to force a bard to not finish all the wines in the vicinity).
After a while in the party, Kaeya brings you to a secluded place with no people for air. Being in a party filled with people could be suffocating at times, especially if you’re not used to it. He intertwined his hands with yours and bends down to meet your eye level (or leans down if you have the same height as him-). He gives you a cheeky smile and proceeds to place a peck on your lips. Chuckling when you pouted and glared at him, wanting more kisses.
“My my, what a greedy vixen~ But it is indeed your birthday so I guess I have no choice but to oblige to whatever my birthday vixen wants me to do. Would you like me to strip as well? Haha. Kidding kidding. Happy birthday, princess/prince. May many more to come. Oh! I forgot. I heard from a certain birdie that you ordered for a personal performance from me~ would you like to get it now?” 
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Since we all know that Venti practically doesn’t do anything like every day, I would safely say that he would remember your birthday. Probably save some mora to buy you a gift for your birthday, even though it’s not as fancy as the people in Liyue (they all rich kids-), it’s still meaningful. He probably made a bracelet all by himself with the beads he either bought or also made by himself. Nevertheless, he was as excited as Kaeya for your birthday. Already prepared songs to sing for you when that day comes. 
Venti immediately searches for you when the day finally arrives, but his excited and bright smile vanishes when he can’t find you in the crowd of people. Raising a brow at your sudden disappearance, he searched for you everywhere, the tavern, the church, the headquarters, everywhere but your house. So when he finally arrives at your house, he was filled with worry and concern. Entering your room through the window like usual, he sees your figure sitting on the floor while reading a book.
He pouted at the sight as he made his presence known by asking you why you were here and reading a book on your birthday. He watches as you jump from where you are and turns to look at him, sighing at the sight of him. He slowly made his way to you and sat next to you, his legs sprawled across the floor. He takes note of the food around you, which was non-birthday festive, it was just ordinary food. Not understanding why you’re sulking in your room, he asked you what’s wrong. 
Venti’s eyes widened at your explanation, feeling the sadness leaking at the words you said. They weave themselves around his heart, squeezing it, making him have a hard time breathing. He shares your pain. He was your soulmate after all. He immediately engulfed you in a hug, stuffing his face on the crook of your neck. You were so vulnerable in his eyes. You were so fragile. He desperately wants to protect you from the pain. But looks like he can’t protect you from your own demons. 
“Even though I promised myself to not say or do anything that’ll make you sad, I just need to get it off my chest. I’m sorry you had to suffer through that, those demons that a simple bard that weaves stories into songs can’t erase. Alright, no more feeling sorry for yourself. It’s time to get out and spend the rest of the day enjoyable, perfect for my precious Cecilia.” 
Without any warnings, he picked you up and jumped out of your window. Shrieking at the sudden fast pace, you instinctively wrapped your hands around him as he landed on the ground. Giving you a smug smile while saying “didn’t think i’d let you fall now?” Please slap him. Anyway, he laughed at your aggression and continued to run. Even if you ask where you’re going, he just says it's a secret. So might as well enjoy being in his arms as he continues to run (you swear you can feel the wind adding to his speed but that was just maybe your imagination-).
After a while, he placed you down and you realized where you are. It was Starsnatch Cliff, surrounding you were Cecilia flowers. Venti jumped on you, making you fall to the ground as he giggles. His hat flown back from the force of his sudden attack, he still has that stupid big smile on his face. Since his laughter is contagious, you couldn’t help but laugh alongside him. His eyes glistened with delight at the sight of your smile finally. Grabbing your hand and placing the bracelet he made, he pressed a kiss on your knuckle.
“This bracelet shall be a promise from me to you, a fellow bard to the fairest queen/king. I shall love you for eternity, this heart will only beat for you, and this body belongs to you. If you’re in dire need of assistance, don’t hesitate to call me. I’ll be there, forever and always. Happy birthday, my sweet flower.”
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[x] Main Page || [x] Mondstadt Page || [x] Fatui Harbingers Page 
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chanfictions · 3 years ago
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Akatsuki reader, partners...mmmmm maybe Hidan and Kisame.
Again, fem! The reader gets hit by someone else's technique.
(Or she was stupidly thrown something that she didn't have time to dodge).
The reader gets aroused and suddenly wants to have sex, whines, rubs herself against Kisame and Hidan, and they decide to help her ;3
(Either arrive at the base and fuck there, or right where they got rid of the opponents)
Hey anon! Sooooo, I know this isn't exactly what you requested. I couldn't for the life of me fit Hidan and Kisame into the same box to make this work, so I just stuck with Kisame. It started with your ask. One thing led to another and this happened. I got carried away with plot. Again. Hope you still enjoy! 
Cupid
18+ Content! Minors DNI!
Kisame x Reader
Smut with a splash of plot. Unprotected sex-ish. Reader is assumed to be on birth control. Public sex-ish. Aphrodisiacs. Mentions of blood during combat.
You were sent on a mission together to retrieve a special relic that had some unexpected side effects.
3.4k
This mission was doomed from the start.
Pain had partnered you with Kisame on an infiltration and retrieval mission to acquire a powerful ninja tool being housed in a fortified military compound not far from the Hidden Sound. Stealth was your forte, so this sort of thing was right up your alley. While you had no hard-hitting combat skills to fall back on in the event that something went awry, you weren't particularly worried. As a phantom thief with a perfect record in your high profile heists, the thought of getting caught or needing to participate in a fight hardly crossed your mind. You insisted to Pain that you had never needed backup in the past and could easily do this yourself, but Pain disagreed. Kisame was assigned to you more or less as a bodyguard whether you liked it or not.
Kisame had been running solo since Itachi's death and had gotten a tad rusty when it came to fighting alongside another person. Your battle techniques got along about as well as oil and water. You favored covert sabotage and traps, and Kisame, well, Kisame was Kisame. Nothing that man did was small. He transformed every battlefield he encountered into a shark-infested lake before completely obliterating his opponents.
That's how everything went sideways. Kisame, bless his blue heart, was not subtle. You donned your camouflage jutsu and got ready to slink into the compound. "I'll pop a flare if I get into trouble. It's going to be much easier to sneak in and out without a 6'8" sword on legs following me. Just wait here."
Staring at the spot where he thought you were probably standing, Kisame's face twisted slightly. "This really isn't a good idea, Y/N." Unfortunately for Kisame, you were already long gone, and he was having a conversation with the wind. With a heavy sigh, he leaned back against a thick tree, focusing on the compound not far off in the distance where you would be poking around on your own. He didn't like the idea of you going in there alone. You were still relatively new to the Akatsuki, and your skills had yet to be formally tested. Kisame got along with you quite well and rather liked you, so allowing you to dive head first into danger without any real offensive jutsu in your arsenal left him on edge.
That overprotective nervousness regarding your safety was what sent everything spiraling out of control. An alarm sounding from within the walls of the compound left Kisame bristling and looking skyward for a flare. As the seconds ticked by into minutes with no cloud of smoke rising into the sky and the clear sound of soldiers mobilizing inside, Kisame made the executive decision to throw your plan out the window.
What he didn't know was that the alarm you set off was a decoy. Oh, shit. After plunging the base into chaos, it occurred to you that you had neglected to tell Kisame as much. At that moment, you realized that Kisame was probably about to charge in, sharkskin blazing. Shit, shit, shit! Every profanity you knew blared across your stream of consciousness like ticker tape as you hurriedly snatched the relic longbow you had been sent in to retrieve. A gooey sap coated the slick wood which left you quickly wiping your palms on your thighs to clean your hands before making a beeline for the exit. The growing cacophony of chaos outside announced Kisame's arrival.
As you expected, things outside had gotten a little out of hand. Kisame was in the heat of battle, taking on an army by himself and winning. Jutsu flew across the battlefield like exchanges of elemental cannon fire. Half of a battalion was encased in water prisons and the other was fleeing from shark filled orbs of water. Kisame was grinning ear to ear as he swatted off one after another like whiffle balls with Samehada.
You quickly scurried across the scene, sneaking up behind Kisame and whisper-screaming to get his attention. "Kisame, you big dummy! It was just a diversion! I'm fine!!"
Surprised, Kisame turned an eye to where he assumed you were while sending another enemy flying with a swing of his greatsword with an amused chuckle. "Next time, you might want to tell me what your plan is. Here I thought you were fighting off an army all by yourself."
"No, that's just you! Come on, I got the thing. Let's go!" You danced around him to avoid the swings of his sword, still wanting to keep yourself out of sight. Upon seeing his feet shift, you turned around just in time to see a flurry of arrows flying your way in such a wide spray that dodging them was going to be a feat.
Kisame blocked what he could with Samehada, but not knowing where exactly you were, wasn't sure he had protected you. A yelp answered his question. You shimmered back into sight just in front of him. He missed one, and it had plunged straight through your thigh. A stain of your blood quickly began mixing in with the sap you had wiped on your pants earlier. "Damnit!"
"I'm fine! Let's just go!" You shouted over the clatter of weapons and incoming pursuit, getting ready to run. With a snarl, Kisame reached down and snapped both ends off of the arrow before unceremoniously throwing you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and retreating.
Fortunately, the soldiers had been so devastated by Kisame's onslaught that they hardly had the numbers to launch a fruitful pursuit. In the chaos, they had yet to notice that you stole the very item this outpost had been built to protect. Once he had put sufficient distance between you two and the base, he searched briefly for some cover to deal with your leg wound and leapt down from the towering branches to set you down with your back to a barky trunk.
You were beginning to feel flushed and hot as a shiver of heat rattled through your body and left an oddly pleasant knot in your belly. Blood roared in your ears as your heart began to race. When you looked up at Kisame, something felt… different.
Kisame knelt down to look at your leg. "You should have been standing behind me," he chided while setting one large palm on your thigh to brace it while he used the other to remove the broken arrow shaft. An ache built in your core as you caught your lip between your teeth. The warmth of his hand sent a tingling sensation rippling through your body. "Sorry, I didn't mean for that to hurt."
With massively dilated pupils, you stared at him hungrily. "It… didn't hurt," you breathed. With a deep inhale, you wondered how you never noticed how good he smelled.
Kisame stared back at you critically. "You're awfully sweaty for someone who wasn't running." Shock washed over his face after touching your forehead. You were positively boiling. "Y/N, are you feeling alright? Was there poison on that arrowhead? Your eyes..." Concern was beginning to bubble as he pulled the item in question from his pack, examining it, completely oblivious to the wild fantasies bubbling in your head.
He was so close. Your body hummed to life as that heat in your belly began growing in size. An ache throbbed through your core. Your heart was in your mouth. Every inch of your skin pricked with the need for contact. And Kisame… how had you never noticed just how hot he was? Sure, you had some occasional dirty, late night fantasies about him. But now? You couldn't tear your eyes away from him. The muscles rippling across his torso were hardly concealed by that black cloak. Even with those unusual features, his face was remarkably handsome, not to mention each time he spoke, shocks seemed to travel straight through your body and into your clit. Still with your lip caught between your teeth, you let out a sultry breath and ghosted your fingertips along his firm bicep. All that seemed to do was make your hunger worse.
Kisame, entirely oblivious to what was unfolding behind your eyes, just looked confused. The arrowhead didn't appear to have any substance left on it, and he couldn't think of another cause for your apparently unwell state. He unpacked some rudimentary first aid supplies from his pack and wrapped some gauze tightly around your thigh as a temporary measure to staunch the bleeding. Thinking that your stare focused at him was vacant, he snapped his fingers in front of your face to try to get your attention. "Hey, talk to me. What's going on with you?"
While his arm was extended, you latched onto it like a lifeline, nuzzling your face into his bicep and inhaling deeply. "Kisame..." You couldn't resist. You needed to touch him. Following that arm back to his torso, your hands traced every ripple of muscle while Kisame froze in shock.
You were his partner. While he undoubtedly found you attractive, this seemed like an odd time to suddenly declare your own desires. "What's gotten into you?" He wrapped his hands around your wrists, engulfing them entirely, as they traversed his muscular chest.
"Dunno… I just really… really need you." You used the grip he had to pull yourself in, burying your face against his neck and breathing deeply again. "You smell so good…"
A light heat rushed across Kisame's cheeks as you abruptly began coming on to him. Between your strange behavior and the thrill of the battle he had just been in, he was amped up. Your body being pressed so tightly against his was causing some complications to arise. His pulse quickened as you nuzzled and rubbed yourself against him. Feeling your breasts against his chest and your heated breath on his neck was distracting him from the issue at hand. "Y/N…" He let out your name in a low growl, intending it to be a warning, but it didn't quite come off with the bite he had intended. Hearing that word fall from his lips in such a tone just set you ablaze. A little moan escaped your lips, and you coiled yourself around him like a lusty little boa constrictor, trailing little bites and open mouth kisses on his neck, savoring every salty inch of his exposed skin. Another deep growl rumbled in Kisame's chest as he ran a strong palm up your spine to the back of your neck. "You're under the influence of some kind of jutsu," he breathed heavily, trying very hard to resist biting you back as his own desire built rapidly. There was no denying how steamy this situation was growing.
"Don't care," you whispered, nibbling at his ear as your hands wandered the chiseled landscape of his body.
"You're injured," he continued, now getting sucked into your lusty riptide, grazing your neck with pointed teeth.
"Don't care," you breathed again, beginning to unzip his cloak.
"We're in enemy territory," he murmured between bites on your throat that no doubt left marks before swallowing you in a crushing kiss. Those calloused hands ran up your sides, wanting to explore more but seeming hesitant.
"Don't care," you mewled, reaching for the waist of his pants, your fingertips grazing the impressive package Kisame was concealing, wiggling your hips for any kind of relief from the needy heat that was driving you to the brink of madness. Your panties were drenched. Your core ached. It was like you had been edged for two days straight without any kind of release. Every nerve in your body was hypersensitive to touch.
Another deep sound rattled in his throat. You ensnared him in this whirlwind, and there was no going back now. You undressed each other in a flurry of zippers and fabric, discarding one item after another in a heap upon the leaves scattered across the forest floor. You didn't care about the dirt. Nothing else existed to you right now outside of the deft hands moving across your body, making you arch your back and moan. His scent flooded your head. You were drowning in Kisame, yet felt like you were dying of thirst. You wanted him. Needed him. Your brain and body shared a singular focus. Neither the mission nor your bleeding leg mattered right now.
Kisame picked you up by the backs of your thighs, pressing your back against the rough trunk of the tree while leaving a trail of branding bites along your neck and collarbone, drawing a whine out of you. You wrapped your uninjured leg around his waist, grinding your soaked pussy against him and letting a lewd moan drift into the sky. That little bit of friction alone was nearly enough to send you over the edge. Your hands wandered, caressing every ridge and ripple of the muscle coiled like steel cables under his skin. This man was built. By now, you were well aware that he was hung like a horse as well. That impressive appendage was currently teasing the hell out of your hungering little hole. You could feel that broad head rubbing through your slick folds as you shifted. "Kisame, please," you whispered with a breathy lust, rolling your hips against him.
A low, raspy chuckle tickled your ear. "You're going to scream and give away our location," he teased.
"Then kiss me so I can't." Your desperation to have that massive girth inside of you dripped from every pore as you tangled your arms around his neck to pull him into a hungry kiss.
Unable to decline such a delicious request, Kisame shifted you to begin impaling you on his impressive cock painstakingly slowly, stretching your walls around him. He smothered your wails with his mouth. Your back scraped across the rough bark behind you, but you didn't care. This was divine. You tensed and whimpered, both aching to be filled and struggling to accommodate the sheer size of him. You clung to him for dear life, gasping and catching his lip between your teeth as he finally sheathed himself. Your core throbbed and pulsed. Nerves ached for input. You used your good leg to try to pull him in even deeper. Another little chuckle rolled through him at your enthusiasm and impatience. "Someone is eager," he teased again with a single thrust to punctuate his statement.
You mewled before biting his neck. "Kisammm-" He silenced you with a bruising kiss before any more complaints or moans could escape your lips as he began drilling you into that tree. Birds fled from the branches above from the force of his motions disturbing their roosts. You clawed his chest and back, screaming into his mouth as he repeatedly buried himself in your fluttering core. You were on fire. Each time your hypersensitive clit rubbed against his body, stars erupted behind your eyes. Sweat slicked your bodies as a steamy heat began to rise. The drag of your nipples against his skin sent rippling shocks of pleasure through your entire being.
"Fuck, Y/N," he growled in your ear, large palms tightly gripping your ass as he drove himself into you again and again. You buried your face against his shoulder to let out a muffled wail as he sent you right over the edge. Your walls clenched tightly around him, eliciting a primal snarl from his lips. He sank his teeth into your neck as his powerful motions set impressions of that tree bark pressing into your back. With your good leg, you pulled him even deeper, arching into him as you flew off into orbit. A palm slammed over your mouth as he railed you into that tree to stifle the litany of cries erupting from your throat. Your head hit the wood behind you. He kept you pinned firmly there while fucking you into oblivion.
Your world melted away into nothing but the input of pleasure ripping through your body. The surrounding forest faded away. All you could hear was your own muffled heavy breathing, Kisame's grunts, and the slick sounds your bodies made between rhythmic contact. Every inch of you pulsed and throbbed with heat. Orgasm after orgasm tore through you in a continuous wave that left you with numbed legs and a soaked core. Your head was adrift in the clouds, the situation seeming impossible. Your new partner railing you against a tree in enemy territory was not your plan for this mission, but hell, you weren't going to question it. Your body ached and hungered for more. You kissed him as though he were your only source of air and you were suffocating.
Kisame picked up the pace, digging his fingers more firmly into your ass while keeping a tight clamp over your mouth to muffle the inhuman sounds you were making. Your eyes rolled back in your head as you lost yourself in another powerful crash of an orgasm, strangling his impressive girth with the crushing grip of your walls. A low growl and a series of curses rumbled through his body into yours as the depth of the thrusts increased until the hold your pussy had on him sent him over the edge and milked him dry. He growled your name through his release, gripping you tightly against his firm body. The combined sound of your heavy panting was the only thing that could be heard over the breeze rustling through leaves overhead.
That fog in your head slowly began to lift as you caught your breath. Your muscles trembled with fatigue as you dropped your head against his shoulder. "Fuck," you whispered through heavy breaths, slowly running your palms up his chest to his shoulders. Still pinned against the tree with his length buried within you, it took a moment for you to remember where you were. A soft hiss escaped your lips as he shifted your weight, reminding you that there was still a bleeding hole in your thigh.
"You good?" A raspy chuckle rumbled under your head that you had resting against his chest. He maintained his grip on you for the moment, not sure if you were about to go weak in the knees and collapse into a heap if he let you down.
"Yeah, I'm good," you giggled, turning your heated cheek against him before grimacing again when you looked down and saw the rather unfortunate state your leg was in.
Kisame slowly slid his length from you before gently setting your feet back down into the crunchy leaves littering the forest floor. With an arm still around your back for the sake of your stability, he glanced down at what you were eyeing, spotting your wound and what looked like a stain of pink that wasn't blood still flushing the surrounding skin. He carefully brushed his fingers against it, picking up a swipe of the gooey substance that you had wiped on your pants earlier that had seeped through the fabric and into your wound when you were hit. "What's this?" He inquired curiously, giving it a sniff.
"Some sap or something that was oozing from that bow," you breathed, shifting your weight onto your good leg and breathing heavily still as you leaned into him.
Kisame let out a hearty laugh. "You didn't wear gloves when you handled it, did you?"
Your face paled. You had entirely forgotten Pain's instructions regarding the handling of that weapon in your haste to leave with it during Kisame's little rumble with the defending army. "Oh, god -- damnit." An embarrassed laugh started shaking your shoulders as you defeatedly let your forehead fall against his chest.
"That bow is made of cherub wood. While it makes excellent longbows, its sap is also the primary ingredient in aphrodisiacs," Kisame teased. The embarrassed giggling overtook you and melted into genuine, hysterical laughter.
"Woops."
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veneli · 3 years ago
Text
Songs I Associate with Redacted Characters (due to unhealthy attachment)
I have a weird obsession with songs that don’t have particularly special meanings to the characters but I’ve just associated them with several Redacted characters.
The attachment to the song PLUS the characters makes me inseparable from them and I will write this down to remind myself later.
feel free to also roast me about my music taste I won't get offended :)
CW// minor spoilers for the Inversion under the cut, no spoilers in tags, mention of RedactedASMR's Echo and Adam
You Are My Sunshine (Johnny Cash)
For either Elliott or Asher. they’re the freaking sun to me. A giant ball of energy, wouldn’t be alive without them, brings light to the world, warm, cozy, but can also have the power to absolutely obliterate you if you rub them the wrong way.
Fallin' All in You (Shawn Mendes)
For Gavin and Freelancer. Gavin thought he could never find someone who loved him as people only wanted him for his appearance and a good time. However, Freelancer was his turning point—his safety net that he could rely on while he explored this feeling they called “love” with them.
Electric Love (BØRNS)
For Vincent and Lovely. Self explanatory, right? Well... not really anymore since Lovely got turned, but the point still stands. I fully believe that Lovely’s magic will just be muted. It’s strong. It will be bottled, but still electrifying. They’re strong. Amazingly strong and wonderful and versatile. I believe in them. (Erik had better not inject any more angst into Dahlia atm they've suffered enough for a lifetime)
The Bro Duet (George Salazar and Jason Gotay)
For Milo x Asher, or Asher x David, or Ash x Milo x David. You canNOT convince me that those three, at some point in their teenage years, did not hang out at each other's houses and not kissed each other at least once out of curiosity. (in case you didn't know, I love the wolf pack polycule HC). David's probably saved Ash more than once from choking on his pizza and wings since that guy basically inhales it the moment he gets it from Guy.
Footloose (from the movie Footloose 1984)
I have no clue why, this song came onto my shuffle and it reminded me so much of Milo Greer I had to write it down. Maybe it's the accent, or the style of the movie itself. Fashionable and kinda vintage! And don't tell me Milo can't whip up some good footwork - i will not be taking criticism. I just imagine him dancing in the middle of his living room singing something/along to a TV jingle and that makes me so freaking happy
Play With Fire (Sam Tinnesz)
This one reminds me of Adam. I hate his guts but he's kind of hot so I'll let it slide sadistic, looking for trouble, would 101% watch his prey writhe under his hold before ending them with no mercy.
Paparazzi (Lady Gaga)
For Angel. When they were "stalking" David. that's all.
Hooked (Why Don't We)
the D.A.M.N. polycule. Lyrics are pretty self-explanatory, and I think even Gavin would like this song and feel like a rebel against norms. I think it fits them nicely, in a way. After all that they've been through in the Inversion and Season 1, I think they would put up with each other a lot more. Hooked to each other, afraid to lose the others and feeling constantly on a happy-high when they spend time together.
Woman Like Me (Little Mix ft. Nicki Minaj)
Ignore the "woman" in the title, but this is for Darlin'/Tank and Sam. Trouble follows Darlin' wherever they go, but despite that, Sammy still loves them. And I find that extremely endearing. "I'll take care of you" "it's rotten work" "not if it's you" kind of vibes.
Talk (Why Don't We)
Geordi and Cutie at the start of their storyline. Before they developed that understanding of mutual privacy, the lyrics is probably what happens.
Panic Room (Au/Ra)
Echo. That's it, just Echo. (what pronouns does Echo use? as much as I am terrified of Echo I still want to use the right pronouns) Echo is the incarnation of this song. Panic and fear, never know what to expect. Echo's videos are probably a few sources of anxiety for me and this song fits Echo so well. (Spotify audio here, Tumblr only allows 10 medias per post)
that's it for now. I will hopefully do more of these soon whenever I have a jam session on Spotify!
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pattern-recognition · 3 years ago
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You do look super cute in your halloween get up. Did you have fun in your activities?
best night of my goddamn life bar none. Fuck cringe fuck longing after the music scenes of yore from decades past, it is extremely fucking fun to be a teenager/early 20s in 2021.
Before even going I just knew this show in particular would be the one they really gave a shit about, it was halloween night after all, and I was right. Look at the recordings of the previous shows, they didn't fuck as hard as this one. Also, as a preface I should say I was on like a lot of acid. Alice gas opened and from the get go a mosh pit started, my 5'0 90lbs ass basically at the ring until someone cut in front. It never really closed either since the crowd was rowdy as hell in the best way because it's ever felt so good to be tossed around like a ragdoll and having so many hundreds of pounds of human musculature pressed on you from every angle that your lungs compress. I don't think Alice made eye contact with the crowd once, she just hunched over her laptop with her hair covering her whole face and with the lighting it seemed fucking angelic. Hardcover Heaven was an apt set. Most of gec's actual performance is a blur of auditory, visual, and physiological stimuli but I can say they really embraced halloween. Laura had a lot of spooky spoken interludes and laughed a lot between tracks, their music was way, way noisier than usually and there were prolonged stretches of just hellish trash compactor, guitar destroying, and laura screaming which was the best part of the whole goddamn show. At the end of the set the crowd demanded one more song and we were stomping the floor so hard the ground shook, they obliged and played a few more. After an incredibly trippy drive home I "ended the light" by smoking a 50/50 special and listening to creep 4 yr bones. Or, at least that was the plan until it sent me into literally the most intense high I've ever felt, just complete perception obliteration on the couch for a couple of hours. I knew the acid I took was stronger than usual but I didn't realize it had the capacity to make 4g of shrooms look like a sober daydream.
Other shit:
- There was a dude wearing a lampshade on his head filming the show with a 3DS.
- Halloween was such a fucking good idea. Most people were dressed in a vaguely legal menagerie of fishnets and skirts so in short I've never felt so connected with a massive, incredibly sweaty phalanx of super gay and trans people. I don't think it's possible to see this many trans women in one place outside of a show.
- Their costumes fucked. The wizard robes and scary masks were fun but what's really going to stick is seeing Laura Les hit a pen through an articulated minotaur head on stage.
- There were a lot of songs I hadn't heard before; whether it was new album stuff or misc material that I just didn't remember I won't know until 10000gecs drops.
- There were as many monster cans as you’d expect
- I don't remember most of the music they played between sets, but I remember Jeff Rosenstock's Ska album and Pss Pss from The Powers That B. Hearing Death Grips out of nowhere made me really happy.
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here's a shot of my dilated as fuck eye
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hitsuhinahappiness · 4 years ago
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Scar Map - All Sewn Up
(T/W: Swearing and language)
The journey back through the Senkaimon was typical at first, to say the least, and the squad ten captain was not surprised that his chipper lieutenant was, still, bouncing off the walls as they walked to the other end of the massive channel to take them home. 
“Why couldn’t we have just stayed a little bit longer, Captain?” The strawberry blonde complains. 
“I wanted to do a little more shopping! I had only scratched the surface of the Karakura Mall when we were so abruptly and rudely summoned home!” Only the sound of the soft padding of their sandals against the dirt interrupted the silence that the lieutenant did not take up.
Her captain sighed. It was clear by the tone of her voice she was only trying to lighten the mood. Nevertheless, he was going to lecture her. 
“It can’t be helped, Matsumoto. We have to report back to the head captain. We cannot return to the world of the living without backup. These arrancars, they’re much too strong for just us alone to handle. Even Ichigo Kurosaki couldn’t defeat one of the Espadas. For all we know, they’re going to invade the Soul Society next. Tactically, their next move could be to eliminate all those who pose a threat to their plans. That includes the captains, the lieutenants, anyone who could stand a chance in a battle with a soldier of his undead army.” His silvery eyebrows furrowed as he trudged through the gravel. 
Aizen. What hell are you doing with Orihime Inoue? Did you think no one would notice? That no one cared for her, or that they wouldn't come for her? You seem to have a nasty habit of swiping loved ones for your own personal gain.. His loose hands at his side became tightly wound fists.
He shook it off as he heard Matsumoto begin to speak again, this time, taking on a somber tone. 
“Soldiers… Captain, could they really be starting an army? Aizen, Tosen… and Gin?”
“They are, and they have created their own militia. Now, we need to get back and hunker down. We need to prepare the Soul Society for whatever may come next.” 
“The captain’s right, Rangiku,” Ikkaku starts. 
“It doesn’t matter now, all that matters is that we prepare the others, and make sure that we have enough muscle to destroy these bastards. We won’t let them take our home or the souls of the innocent.” 
“How mature of you, Ikkaku. I’m so proud!” Yumichika chimes in. 
“Mature? I’m always mature, mature’s my middle name.” He rebukes. 
“Yeah, sure..”
“Would all of you be quiet!? Just for once?” Toshiro calls from ahead of the trio. 
“We’ve almost arrived.” 
“I think you’re just grumpy because you get to didn’t spend enough quality time with M--”
“Do not.” He interrupts sharply without looking back. Rangiku burns holes in the back of his head with her laser beam eyes. She had been trying to gain more information about Momo’s wellbeing ever since she heard her captain speaking to her on the video monitor back at Orihime’s house. 
I heard her voice, but.. 
Matsumoto turns to look back at Ikkaku and Yumichika, who have struck up a conversation of their own about the Aizen situation, and then briskly strides a little faster to catch up to her captain. 
Then she was just… gone..
“Is it that bad?” Rangiku murmurs from behind him, her eyes slanted with worry. She noticed his shoulders tense, and he took a long pause before uttering his next words quietly.
“... I don’t know what to do… how am I supposed to explain this all to her? He has her so--...” As if his voice wasn’t low and chilling enough, he forces out the word even more hushed between gritted teeth.
“Brainwashed.” He swallows hard and looks up as the slight glint of the portal catches his eye. 
“If anyone can bring her back, Captain,” Matsumoto says as they approach the Soul Society once more. 
“It’s you, and she will come back to you. You know that, don’t you? At some point, she’ll have to realize that Aizen was never there for her in the way you have been her entire life.” They walk into the blinding light side by side, followed by the two from the Zaraki squad. 
“I truly hope you’re right, Rangiku.”
______________________________________________________________
“This Captain’s meeting is now in session. Pay attention everyone.” The Head Captain’s booming voice calls out to all the ten remaining captains. 
“We know now that Souske Aizen, Traitor of the Soul Society and the Thirteen Court Guard Squads, is forming a militia of his own, and his base of operations, as reported and confirmed by Captain Hitsugaya and his team, is Hueco Mundo. We suspect he is preparing to harness the power of the Hogyoku to obliterate the barriers between this realm, the hollow realm, and the world of the living. We must prepare for worst-case scenario outcomes. Now, we do not know exactly how powerful some of the men in his army are, however..” 
Yamamoto drones on and the captains all listen respectfully, but Captain Hitsugaya’s thoughts are elsewhere. 
Where was Sasakibe holding Momo? And what were they doing with her? Is she asleep again? Is she alright? Or is she scared? 
He stared down at his feet intently, itching to see her again, to know that she was okay. He was too caught up in his thoughts that he failed to notice the Head Captain beckoning him until he was snapped out of his own head with a stern, 
“Toshiro Hitsugaya. I have asked you to report!” 
Toshiro looks up, blinking and tightening his jaw. He takes a deep breath before answering. 
“My apologies, Head Captain, there’s just a lot to digest. These arrancar, they’re strong. Much stronger than we’ve anticipated. As we’ve learned, the Adjuchas are the lower-level, pawn-like soldiers in his army. These Adjuchas level soldiers had all five of us nearly defeated, and it took the release of the Gentei Kaijo for us to finally be able to turn the battles in our favor. However, we know that Aizen has soldiers who are much stronger than even these Adjuchas, who we were just able to eliminate after using all of our capabilities. The strength of these humanoid-hollows is… unimaginable. One of the more elite soldiers was there, in Karakura town. His spiritual pressure was immense. It was… an ocean of spirit energy. He attacked Rukia Kuchiki of Squad 13 and the substitute soul reaper, Ichigo Kurosaki, and injured them both severely, although this arrancar was summoned back to Hueco Mundo before either of them were killed. He arrived once more in the World of the Living about a month later with three other arrancars. We were able to fend them off and nearly defeat them, until they escaped once again, this time taking Orihime Inoue, friend of the substitute soul reaper, Ichigo Kurosaki, with them. It appears she went voluntarily to Hueco Mundo, and it seems Souske may be interested in her… special powers. Aizen has also arranged ten of the most powerful arrancar at his disposal to serve as his most trusted informants. These soldiers are his muscle, the strongest among his hollow subordinates. The arrancar that Ichigo Kurosaki and Rukia Kuchiki battled was one of these powerful “Vasto Lorde”. They are called ‘Espada’. Throughout the mission, we were able to eliminate a few of Aizen’s arrancar. However, we are still unsure as to how many men he has in total. It would seem that there are still ten remaining Espada, and an unknown number of arrancar pawns.”  
No one speaks as the information sinks into each of the captains’ minds. A quiet murmur of conversation begins to rise in the air like dust on a windy day out in the Rukongai. An unspoken question hangs above them like a guillotine blade, 
“Are we doomed?”
“Silence!” Yamamoto’s voice swoops through the chatter and once again, the meeting room is silent. 
“Our job is to ensure that each and every one of us becomes stronger. We need to be strong enough to crush Souske Aizen’s plan before he even has a chance to set it into motion! We now have three months for preparations. Come winter, everyone must be ready for all-out war.” 
_____________________________________________________________
A/N: Well, I hope you all enjoyed the first chapter! There’s much more to come. I’ve edited all that I have so far, and perfected it the way I saw fit, grammar and spelling wise. I’m not sure how long this will end up being, but I guess I’ll just keep writing as long as I have the inspiration! Constructive Criticism and suggestions are always welcome. Much love and joy and peace to you all!! 
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explosionshark · 4 years ago
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how to live here!
here's a special deleted scene that was supposed to go in one of the chapters after rachel and chloe start fighting, but i never really found a place where it made sense. but i always liked it too much to delete it.
The first time Chloe had talked about hanging out in a junkyard, Max had kind of assumed she’d been joking.
She’s been here a few times already since her return to Arcadia Bay, but the novelty of it still hasn’t worn off. Chloe doesn’t seem to mind, letting her wander off, camera in hand, to explore and take photos by herself until she’s halfway through a roll of film and finally satisfied.
Max lets the sound of breaking glass lead her back to Chloe and snaps one more picture. Chloe, broken off hockey stick poised at the highest arc of a big swing, aimed at the sun-bleached head of a mannequin perched atop a splintered milk crate like a fucked up golf ball on a tee.
The arc of the swing is completed. The head goes flying with a sharp crack, landing in a pile of scrap a few feet away. Chloe holds the stick up over her head and cheers.
“You get that, Max?” she calls over her shoulder. “One for the highlight reel.”
“Got it,” Max confirms, reaching up to withdraw the Polaroid as it’s ejected from the camera. She closes the distance between them to show Chloe the shot.
“Sick,” Chloe says, and then twirls the stick in her fingers. “Y’know, I never used to allow press in here before, but maybe that was a mistake. A few more like that and maybe I can finally catch some attention from the big leagues.”
“I can’t imagine they can ignore skills like yours for very long,” Max grins, leaning up on her tiptoes and craning her neck to try to spot the mannequin head in the garbage.
Chloe grins again and mimes another swing. “Wanna take a shot? Ride out my hot streak?”
“I’m good,” Max says.
Chloe nods and shrugs and swings again abruptly, for real, putting the end of the hockey stick through the screen of a boxy old TV on the ground suddenly and loudly enough to make Max jump.
“You sure?” She props a boot on the corner of the TV to hold it in place as she yanks the stick loose. “It’s hella cathartic. You’ve always struck me as having more rage than you’re willing to own up to.”
“Do I really?” Max asks, a little alarmed.
“Maybe I’m projecting,” Chloe concedes.
They wander further, Max trailing behind as Chloe beats the ever-loving shit out of anything even vaguely breakable in her path.
“Remember when you actually played?” Max asks, after the fifteenth minute of uninterrupted smashing.
Chloe pauses, turning on her heel and drawing the bandage on her arm across her forehead to wipe away a bead of sweat. “Oh hell yeah. They called me The Destroyer.”
“No they didn’t,” Max rolls her eyes. “Only you called yourself that.”
“Me and both our dads,” Chloe points out. “Yours even made a sign.”
“Oh yeah,” Max laughs. “Y’know, I think you were the hockey hooligan kid he always wanted. I couldn’t tell if he was disappointed or relieved when I quit the team.”
Her dad was a huge hockey fan and had been elated when she and Chloe had agreed when he showed them the newspaper ad he’d found seeking players for the local youth hockey team. William and their mothers had been a little more hesitant, Max remembered, but no one enough to really object to their joining.
Chloe took to it immediately, aggressive, competitive, and already more naturally athletic than Max had ever been. Max’s tenure was only a week long, but she’d remained a devoted fan of the team long after, going along with her parents to every game, home and away.
“Relieved, I think,” Chloe speculates. “You were a really small twelve year old.”
“I was appropriately sized for twelve,” Max protests. “You were tall.”
“Pint-sized,” Chloe teases. “Microscopic. Besides, you never had the heart for it. The bloodlust.”
“I liked the skating part. But yeah, you always had more fun with it than me. Did you ever get back to sports?”
Chloe shakes her head, quick and jerky, almost offended. “I never liked sports. I liked hockey ‘cause you guys would always come to my games and stuff. But then…after…”
Chloe missed the first couple weeks of practice, after William had died. It was Max’s dad that got her to go back, at Joyce’s insistence, hoping that the sport could be an outlet, that trying to preserve as much normalcy as possible would help Chloe deal with her grief.
Max and her dad had stayed in the bleachers through that first practice without William. Chloe’s play had been sloppier, and she’d left the ice early, face splotchy and red, thick hot tears running down her face into her jersey. It hadn’t gotten easier from there. It made sense that Chloe had stopped going entirely once Max’s family had moved.
“Anyway, can you even imagine me playing for Blackwell?” Chloe scoffs, brings the hockey stick down on the windshield of an old beat up car. The first blow sends a spiderweb of cracks all through the glass. The second penetrates, a small, fist-sized hole. The third, fourth, and fifth obliterate it completely.
Max closes her eyes, chases the images of a young, grief-stricken Chloe from her mind with this new fantasy. Chloe, hair undyed, strutting through the halls in a red and white letterman jacket. Chloe doing keg stands with Logan and Zach. Chloe with girls like Victoria and Juliet hanging off her arms. Chloe completely and totally ignoring a nerd like her.
“Okay, it’s a little weird,” Max admits, feeling a little embarrassed for the irrational churning in her gut. “You’ve never really been a joiner, huh?”
“Organized sports are so not punk rock,” Chloe says obnoxiously.
“It’s kind of hard to imagine you at Blackwell at all,” Max admits. “I wish I’d come back sooner. Y’know, before you left.”
Chloe’s quiet and Max knew it was a risk to go there at all, but it feels too true to keep to herself so she keeps speaking.
“I didn’t choose to be gone, but,” is it brave or stupid to do this now, actually? Has Chloe been waiting for an apology or will this just make things needlessly awkward and uncomfortable and painful? “I mean I wish I’d handled it differently. That we’d talked more while I’d been away.”
“Yeah,” Chloe shrugs. It feels like Max is on the verge of losing her, so she hurries on before the silence between them stretches too far.
“Can I be honest with you?” Max asks, stomach twisting in knots.
Chloe raises an eyebrow and nods for her to continue.
“I kind of thought,” she pauses and winces. “I mean, I was a little afraid that after I left you just. Wouldn’t want anything to do with me. That you’d replace me.”
“Max, what the fuck?” Chloe lets the words out in a harsh exhale and Max knows that tone of voice. Knows she’s pissed off for real, now.
“I know,” Max cringes, scrubbing a hand down her face. “But, I mean, you were always the cool one, right? And you were going into high school and I was still sleeping with a teddy bear and—”
“This is such bullshit,” Chloe’s voice cracks and Max was not expecting that. “You’re not just— You can’t just replace a best friend! I fucking needed you. I was so… I needed you so much and you hung me out to dry because you were scared I’d stop thinking you were cool?”
“No,” Max hurries to clarify, feeling appropriately breathless for the desperate, drowning sensation overwhelming her. “No, not like that. I just… I didn’t know how to handle it. So, I just kept putting it off, y’know? Like with homework. Remember how many times my mom had to bail me out because I’d wait too long on finishing a project and it wouldn’t be ready by the due date? Only no one could bail me out this time. And the longer I waited, the worse I felt, the more sure I was that you hated me, that you’d scream at me and tell me to stay out of your life. And I was too scared to face that so I…”
“I never hated you,” Chloe says, face caught somewhere between fury and despair. “Fuck, for the longest time all I wanted was to leave here, to be where you were instead.”
“The night you called me,” Max cuts in gently, proud at least when her voice doesn’t shake, “when you tried to run away, I was so scared for you. And I felt guilty because I realized I was wrong, that you still wanted to be my friend, and I knew I didn’t deserve it. I cried myself sick on the ride down with my mom to pick you up. It really freaked her out. But when we got there you just hugged me and you let me hold your hand the entire way back to Arcadia Bay.”
Chloe stays silent, chewing her lip hard enough to make Max wince.
“And even after, even though we were talking again the entire time I was away I’d think about being back here instead. I think about all the years I missed with you and I get mad because it feels kind of like my fault. Like if I’d tried harder it wouldn’t have taken this long. But I can’t fix that now, I know, I’m just glad we’re here now.”
Chloe shakes her head, rough, and throws the beat up hockey stick into a pile behind her. “Max, you fucking—”
She cuts herself and stomps over and Max isn’t sure what she was expecting, but she’s definitely surprised when Chloe wraps her arms around her, drags her close until there’s almost no space between them.
As tight as the hug is, Chloe’s hands hovering over her back are gentle. She’s quiet but her breathing’s rough. It takes a long time for her to speak again; when she does her voice is shaky, quiet. “I never, ever hated you, but I was pissed at you for a really long time.”
“I’m sorry,” Max tries to say but Chloe squeezes her tighter until she falls quiet.
“I got tired of it,” Chloe says. “And it wasn’t fair, either. Not really. We were just kids. God, I fucked so many things up so much worse than that. You don’t know how bad. If you did, you’d think I’m so pathetic. You’d hate it.”
“Chloe Price, you’re so many things, but pathetic has never been one of them,” Max insists, a little startled by the steel in her voice. Chloe tenses in her arms, but doesn’t move away so Max continues, gentler, “I wish I’d been here more. I know you weren’t alone the whole time but still, if I could go back and change anything it’d be trying harder to be a bigger part of your life. It’d be not letting it take so long to get here.”
It’s stupid, she knows, it’s ridiculous to think she could have prevented any of the hard knocks Chloe had taken in her absence but the thing is she’ll never know and Max thinks that she’ll probably always feel responsible somehow.
“God, imagine if we’d had a few years together at Black-Hell,” Chloe says and releases her, finally. She stays close, pushes some hair out of Max’s face. “We would have gotten into so much trouble. Me, you and…” She trails off with a wince but doesn’t linger. “You could have cheated off my science papers. I’d trade you rides around the Bay for homework.”
“Hey,” Max laughs. “Presumptuous. How do you know I would have compromised my morals like that?”
“Oh, you would have,” Chloe says, laugh all low and breathy. “When have you ever been able to say no to these baby blues?”
She bats her lashes facetiously, but the blush staining Max’s face is very real. “Okay, whatever. What else would we have done?”
“Oh, pranks,” Chloe says. “No doubt. We would have pranked it up so hard on those nerds. I always had this idea about semi-permanent hair dye and Victoria’s shampoo bottles, but I never lived in the dorms. And for some reason, Rachel refuses to be my inside man on this one.”
“I’d be down,” Max blurts out, not sure what the sudden pained look on Chloe’s face could have been leading to, but desperate to head it off.
“Wait, for real?” Chloe asks, appropriately distracted and Max realizes suddenly that her hypothetical assent to collusion had just been offered in practice.
“Uh, I mean—”
“No take-backs,” Chloe crows, gleefully. “Holy shit, dude, yes. Okay, I’ve got it worked out pretty well, this is something I’ve been sitting on for a few years at least. First, we’ll need a distraction…”
Chloe’s plan is elaborate, but thorough, and by the time she’s done laying out the details Max isn’t sure she’ll be able to follow through, but she does know that whatever lingering doubts about their friendship she’d had this morning were founded in one-sided insecurity.
“Let me sleep on it,” she says, finally.
“Max,” Chloe whines. “You promised.”
“I did not.”
“I mean, practically.”
“No, I didn’t.”
It’s almost like being a kid again, arguing about something pointless under the midday sun, a little dehydrated but having too much fun together to do something sensible like go back inside. Max has missed this for so long.
She’s deliriously happy she won’t ever have to miss it again.
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cuinnamonbun · 4 years ago
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MC hiding the fact that they pray because they don’t want to feel as though they’re betraying the brothers— but end up getting caught ❤️
Note: This can be any religion, not just exclusive to Muslims :) ❤️
The Demon Brothers Catching GN!MC Praying
Lucifer
When he first caught them, it was awkward to say the least
There were a few awkward minutes of them just looking at each other with a pregnant pause before Lucifer cleared his throat and allowed them to carry on
He honestly forgot that MC is not an enemy of God like he and his brothers are
When MC was done and they went looking for him to explain that they were hiding the fact that they were praying because they felt like they were betraying him, Lucifer was stunned
He would have to reassure them that he does not think less of them for being devoted to God nor does he feel betrayed, even though his mood did sour at the fact
He will alert his brothers that their resident human is religious, so that means no forcing them to do anything that is against their religion
They are, after all, a guest and he must ensure that their stay is as comfortable as possible
Mammon
In a typical Mammon-esque fashion, he was barging in MC’s room as brazen as he pleases to drag them into another one of his money-making schemes adventures
Only to catch them in the middle of an act of worship
Regardless of the type of worship, Mammon would stammer an apology before slamming the door close and running off
MC has to chase him down to explain
He would be upset that MC would think that Mammon react so poorly to the point that they would hide something that is important to them from him
From then on, Mammon started to act nicer to MC because he doesn’t want them to think that they can’t trust him with anything about them
He would tone down the gambling, drinking and partying just for MC 🥺
He wants them to only trust him and feel comfortable enough around him to let their guard down and pray in front of him
Leviathan
Levi is the least out of the brothers to accidentally stumble across MC praying because this boy almost never leaves his room
The only way he would is if Lucifer makes him retrieve MC for dinner or something like that
Again....awkward pause and eye contact
Levi would quickly tell them to hurry up before scurrying away
MC will catch him before he could disappear and explain to him why they hid it from him
He would be understanding of their reasons
Personally, he did feel like it was awkward but our boy is no narc, he would keep MC’s secret and even allow them to use his room if they want to pray in peace
He would feel a twinge of envy at God for having such a wonderful person such as MC so devoted to him though
Satan
The only brother that figured out that they’re religious upon meeting them
Since it’s canon that Satan is an intelligent man with an intensive knowledge, I HC him to be extremely observant and as such, really good at reading body language
He could tell that MC is religious from how they conduct themselves, their mannerisms, what they eat, what they do and how they treat other people
So when he stumbled upon them praying, he would brush it off and continue on with whatever he was doing
If MC explained to him why they were hiding it from him, he would be shocked which then quickly morphs into understanding
Considering how they were in literally hell and in unknown territory surrounded with dangerous beings that have sworn enmity with God, it was a smart move to hide that fact
He will assure them that he doesn’t think less of them and that they are still special to him in his eyes :)
Asmodeus
Among all the brothers, he would be the most dramatic one when he found out
Like,,,, MC why would you live a life that restricts you from having fun??
He doesn’t understand
He would be really upset about it too because then that would REALLY mean that he doesn’t have a chance with them (if you know what I mean)
Eventually he’ll come around but only after MC explained to him the exact reason why they hid it from him
It’d make him go “oh.”
He felt terrible that they feel like they had to hide something about themselves from him because they thought that he would react badly
I mean, he did, but still!!! That makes him feel awful!!!!
He still wouldn’t understand, but he’ll try his best to be supportive of their choices because he really enjoys their company and something like this shouldn’t come in between their friendship
Beelzebub
Unlike his other brothers, he would be the only one who would be supportive of MC right from the start
Sure, he didn’t expect it but hey, it’s YOUR life, others should not dictate how you live it :)
When he first caught them, there would be a few seconds of awkward pause before he snapped out of it and proceeded on to invite MC to work out with him or eat with him
He would even exchange stories with MC about how he used to pray back when he was an angel
If MC explained to him why they hid the fact that they prayed from him, Beel would smile and thank them for keeping him and his brothers in their minds, but he would also encourage them to be proud of who they are
Honestly, he’s such a gem and pure bean and he’s the only brother MC would feel the most comfortable with doing acts of worship around
Belphegor
With Belphie, this would go two ways: he would either not give a shit, or he would be so offended he will shut them out for a few days before crawling back to them
Remember the reason that the Great Celestial War happened was because God wanted to obliterate their beloved little sister for attempting to alter the life of a human that she fell in love with
Belphegor would resent God as much as he resented humans hence why the latter reaction is to shut MC out
But on the other hand, his hatred of Him would perhaps dissipate alongside his hatred of humans though there is still a lingering bitterness
Honestly, he’s the reason why MC felt the need to hide the fact that they prayed in the first place
Eventually though, Belphegor will learn to separate MC from the events of the war
It’s a slow process but with the help from his brothers and MC’s own patience, their relationship will go back to being as it had been before
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mrvdocks · 4 years ago
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Selcouth
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You shouldn’t have come on this stupid trip. Not even if it had opened you up more to him. If anything, you felt this trip had soured the more time had passed. Alex could tell. But you two had to play it safe, play the parts that Karl thought you two assumed from his perspective. You resented that, having to stick to an image that he had formed of you, one that tried to act like you weren’t so in love with him it made your heart ache. 
Or,
You and Alex plan a meet up with Karl for a week trip, only to have your feelings for Karl be put to the test when things don’t pan out how you all planned. (Karl Jacobs/Reader)  
After
“Stop it.” He says, voice serious and no longer joyful or even hinting at friendliness. You’ve heard Karl be serious many times but this time sounded different. This time he sounded like he was scolding a child after being annoyed by them repeatedly. 
“Stop what?” You ask, pretending to be aloof.
“Stop acting like a child!”
“I’m the one acting like a chil - since when was doing something I want, acting like a child?!” 
He makes a hmpf sound. “What is this supposed to be, payback? Is that what you’re playing at?”
“I’m not playing at anything here, Karl. I don’t know what you want me to say.”
He scoffs. “Oh yeah? So you just suddenly developed an interest in Dream overnight, is that it?” 
“Honestly, why do you care so much? My love life isn’t up for debate here.” 
“Oh and mine was?” He retorts.
You knew he would bring it up, you just knew. It was perfect ammo right now. You stutter to find the right words. 
“What - what do you want from me Karl? I don’t need to explain myself to you. Have you considered that maybe I just finally got tired of being alone? That maybe I just needed someone?” 
Karl tries to not let this dig push him over the line but his frustration and jealousy wouldn’t let him stop seeing green. 
“Is this what you do? You like playing with people's feelings? Do you think screwing my friends is going to help you or is this another one of your phases?”
It feels good in the heat of the moment but he knows he’s messed up as soon as he says it. 
Your mouth drops open. Incredible. In-fucking-credible.  
You laugh bitterly, trying to put up a strong front but your voice betrays you by cracking. “That’s low, Karl. That’s - really fucking low.”
Instantly regretting it, he tries to make amends but can’t put words together properly. His mind reels, heart races, palms suddenly feel sweaty and all he can manage is your name. “(Y/N)......I -”
You can’t bear to hear another false apology spill from his lips. If that’s how he felt, then there was no changing his mind. No matter how badly you wanted to. 
“No you’re right. You’re right. You made your choice and so have I. Goodbye Karl.” You conclude and hang up, throwing your phone across the room. You stare at it until your vision becomes blurry with tears. 
Where do you go from here?
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Before
You didn’t think that when you first started streaming that you’d end up at the point you were now. You just wanted to have fun with your friends, maybe meet some new people, share your interests along with the loads of games you found amusing. Interestingly enough, your personality and content seemed to resonate with a lot of people. 
Pretty soon you’d become one of the top streamers on Twitch behind the other big talent that once dominated your dashboard. 
You’d made your way into the big leagues with names like GeorgeNotFound, Dream, Quackity, Nihachu, and even Karl Jacobs. Though you’d met the latter two years ago, you’d become quick friends with Quackity, or Alex(is), having bonded over having similar backgrounds and interests. 
He was more like a brother to you than anything, much to the chagrin of many in the chat. You believe it had to do with growing up in a family with mostly girl siblings. 
Your collabs with Alex garnered lots of views, with people tuning into the streams to watch you two yell at each other chaotically while playing odd games or attempting to bake things. 
Of course, while he did your side of content, that meant you had to hold up your end of the bargain. Minecraft wasn’t your strong suit at first, but as time went on and with some help from both Alex and Karl, you became a little more proficient. 
Karl was no stranger to you, not anymore. Alex had introduced you to Karl a little after he started streaming. You’d only really known him from a couple of Jimmy’s videos. 
He seemed kind, goofy, friendly, and all around a pretty fun guy to be around. Which is why when you started to fall just a little bit for him, you were surprised. You came into this Twitch thing with one rule. Don’t fall for people. 
Things could get messy, it was always a given. The fandoms would tear into you or them, people were unpredictable. It was just better to keep everyone at an arm's length when it came to shipping. 
You were thankful nothing had come to fruition from your friendship with Alex. If anything, all you saw were people shipping you platonically. Though you two would often tease each other if one had a crush on someone. 
Your dynamic with Alex meant that you had countless ridiculous and outrageous moments together, often documenting them when he would visit you in LA from Mexico or you going to Mexico to see family and stopping by to visit him.
It was starting to become a thing you two did a few times a year. This year was no different. Even when the pandemic seemed to sour your plans, you both promised to stay safe and healthy and limit the trips. So far, this was going to be the first trip you two would be taking anywhere. 
Your phone buzzed next to you as you scrolled mindlessly through your discord server. You laughed a bit here and there, looking at memes and chatting with people. 
Alex’s text ringtone was him rage quitting during a game where you absolutely obliterated his ass. You either cracked up at the sound of it or jumped in sudden fear when it bounced off the walls of your apartment in the middle of the night. 
A: Hey wiener, are you packed?? I know you take like three business days to get ready. 
You rolled your eyes. He was supposed to be coming to visit you first before you both made the flight out to see Karl in North Carolina. 
Y: Me??? I’ve been packed since last week. I thought you were supposed to be on the flight here already 🙄
A: I may or may not…...already be out. 💀
Your eyes widen. You abandon the chat and hit the FaceTime button. He lets it ring for a good five seconds before he accepts it and greets you with a close up of his face.
“What am I looking at?” You ask, feigning disgust. 
“My beautiful face, what else?” 
“Really? I thought it was a dog’s asshole.” You chuckle. 
He guffaws. “Fuck off! First I get stranded here in LA, then I get some shitty chicken nuggets and now you’re calling me butt ugly! Why does life hate me so much?!”
“Menso! You were supposed to call me when you - wait did you say chicken nuggets?”
“Yeah, I still have the rest but I can’t finish because every time I chew I think of the pink slime.”
“Ugh don’t talk about Supersize Me, I’m still having nightmares about it. Who shows that to little kids??” 
“Yeah well it’s shit, Burger King’s better.” He admits, munching down on the nuggets. He chews obnoxiously near the phone speaker to annoy you so you tap at the screen in retaliation. 
“Hey, I was supposed to record you trying out American McDonald’s! Why are you taking sweet sweet content away from me? Now no one gets to see you lose your McVirginity!”
He sputters through a mouthful of nuggets and does a combination of coughing and laughing. 
“Anyways,” he says, finally nugget free. “You coming or not? I don’t think I wanna sleep on the airport floor.”
“Yeah yeah, I’m coming. I’ll text you when I’m outside.” 
The airport was a forty five minute drive, thirty if you stepped on it and committed several traffic violations. 
Maybe that would make good content. 
You grabbed your keys and rushed out of your home, fully prepared to go fast and furious. You put your windows down, connected your phone to the aux and blasted Tokyo Drift as you merged into the freeway. 
Half an hour later, you’d arrived at a packed airport pick up area and texted Alex to let him know you’d arrived. He replied that he was starting to feel the effect of the chicken nuggets but that he would push through people to get out of the building before he caught anything from anyone.
Once you could make out his figure up ahead in front of the other cars, you got the bright idea to switch your music to something more interesting. You pulled up one of his videos where he was fully invested in a rendition of Hey There Delilah and honked excessively once you got closer to him. He looked around and pulled his beanie down lower to hide his face in embarrassment. 
You and the prerecorded Quackity sang in off key unison with the volume up as much as you could before he threw his luggage and bags into your backseat, hopped into the passenger seat and put the volume down.
“Never do that again.” 
“Hey, that was your welcome salute. I don’t do that for other people, you’re special and I like it.”
“Could you try liking me a little less? I could do without all the cringe covers.” He laughed to himself as he buckled up. 
The ride home consisted of a mix of very poor and impressive impressions of characters that would’ve annoyed nearly anyone else except you. Alex alternated from a gruff impression of Squidward to a raunchy Mickey Mouse that left you doubling over and gripping the steering wheel. You competed with him, doing your worst impression of Cookie Monster and Goofy. 
Your impression competition was interrupted by a phone call, Karl’s photo flashing flipped a panic switch in you as you scrambled to grab your phone. Alex takes your phone and extends his arm far from your reach. 
“Ah, ah, ah! No texting and driving! You want to kill us or something?!”
“I need to answer! What if he thinks I’m ignoring him?”
“I got it, I got it.” He assures, sliding the bar to unlock the phone and meet Karl face to face.
Karl makes a surprised sound, greeting Alex almost immediately. 
“Hey bub!” You chime in, keeping your eyes on the road but getting a glimpse of Karl in his frog outfit. 
“Hi! Sorry, I didn’t know you were driving.”
“No it’s okay! I’m just coming back from picking up this idiot.” 
“Who you calling idiot, dumbass?” Alex suddenly burst into his Mickey Mouse voice from earlier, ending it with the iconic Mickey laugh. 
Karl seemed to eat it up, breaking into laughter. It was infectious enough to make you chuckle. 
“You guys excited for the trip? It’s looking really pretty here this time of year. I can’t wait to show you around.”
“You mean show us your sweater collection?” Alex jabs.
You nudge him roughly to the side as a warning, glaring at him when he glances at you. 
You’d hoped that the change of scenery would do you some good. LA was an endless heap of  heat that you never could seem to escape. Not even with air conditioning. It was October already, which normally would mean Fall, orange leaves, pumpkins everywhere, a complete shift in temperature, right? Nope. 
It was the devil’s asshole all year round, something Alex could attest to. 
“Don’t mind him, I think he was dropped as a kid.”
“How dare you! There is nothing wrong with me, I’m perfect.”
“Ha! Sure. As if you don’t have a lot of things wrong with you.”
“Oh yeah? Like what?”
You tap at the time on your screen, “We don’t have enough time to get into it.”
You turn your attention back to Karl, very attentive to your bickering, small chuckles here and there. It wasn’t until he made eye contact with you that you felt your hands falter on the wheel. You were lucky enough that it didn’t make you stray away from the road. 
“Um - you know what? We’ll call you later, we’re almost home anyways.” 
“Okay! Be safe! Goodnight. ” Karl bids you both goodbye and poses his phone in front of him in order to hug it from afar, as if to hug both you and Alex. 
You groan to yourself, pretending to bang your head against the steering wheel as soon as you pull up to your complex. Alex laughs at your misery. 
“Oh man, you really are down BAD.”
“Shut up! I regret telling you things sometimes.” 
“No one said you had to! I guess I just have one of those faces.” He Chad swipes at his chin and squints at you.
“Yeah, punch able.” You remark with a quirk of your brow, slipping out of the car and heading to your front door. 
Alex follows, grabbing his things in a hurry before you can get the chance to lock him out and leave him to sleep with the coyotes. 
“Don’t leave me out here! I’m too delicious to die!” He cries.
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You’re awoken by the feeling of warm sunlight on the left side of your face. You hesitate to move, feeling tired already even though you’re sure you slept longer than you should’ve. 
You prop yourself up by your elbows, shielding your face from the sun with your hand. You get out of bed groggily, staring at the floor for a second before making your way to the living room and finding Alex sleeping in a weird position. 
Amused, you rush back into your room and grab your phone to document this moment and post it on Twitter. However when you return, he’s gone. You lean over the couch to check if he’s hiding behind it but he’s nowhere to be found. 
You’re about to crouch to check for his feet or any sign of him when you feel fingers dig in your sides. You yelp in fear and surprise, smacking your attacker until he starts to yell in a shrill voice. 
Alex pushes you over the couch making you fall on your ass. 
“WHAT THE HELL?!” You scream. 
“That’s what you get for trying to take pictures of me!”
You try to stand, rubbing at your sore ass. “Ugh, what are you, a cryptid or something? The people have a right to see!”
“No one gets to see me in the morning! No one! I need my beauty sleep more than you.”
He extends a helping hand for you to take in a moment of truce but you take advantage and pull him down with you to land on his back. He groans when he hits the ground and curses at you in Spanish. 
“Play time’s over, we gotta get ready. The plane leaves in…..one hour????!” 
Your phone says it’s only nine in the morning but you hazily remember the tickets reading ten thirty. 
“No way! I have to take a shower, I have to order food….” He begins, counting on his fingers the various things he suddenly had to do but you stop him by running into your room and getting your bags. 
“No time! Brush your teeth, get dressed, I’ll buy us something at the airport.”
“NOOOO! Airport food is disgusting! Can’t we stop somewhere?” 
“Like I said, no time! We gotta be out of here in thirty minutes.”
He grumbles under his breath. 
“I heard that!” You yell behind you, grabbing a towel and turning on your shower. 
After Alex rummaged through your kitchen, stuffed himself with some snacks and an alarming amount of frozen food, you urged him to shower in the little time span you had left and ordered a ride to take you to the airport. 
You had to basically pull him away from putting on his finishing touches with his beanie, with him complaining that his hair wouldn’t settle under it the way he wanted. You rolled your eyes and shoved him and your stuff into the Uber and kissed California goodbye. 
You two started planning what you’d do in NC as soon as you landed, besides getting food. You could practically hear Alex’s stomach grumbling the whole drive to the airport and even after the Uber gave him some snacks.
There was a sense of urgency that made your stomach twist in knots until you’d arrived at the drop off section. You stuck your tickets in your pocket as you hurried Alex, dragging him and urging him to run faster than he’d ever imagined to catch the plane. 
With only minutes to spare, you didn’t realize you were holding your breath until you panted and tried to regain it once you were at the gate. Alex makes a joke about you being out of breath to the pretty attendant that you make a note of later, just in case he tried to flirt with her. 
Alex followed the attendant like a puppy while you popped your phone out from your pocket and snapped a photo of the plane. You debated sending it to Karl, not sure if wanting your boarding to be a surprise or not. You relented to posting it on Twitter and sending it to Karl. 
Big things coming ;) You tweeted, exiting out of the app as quickly as you’d posted it, knowing you’d be flooded with notifications. 
You switched over to message, sending it to Karl but unsure if he would be awake right now. Maybe it would make his day better. 
On our way! See you soon! :)) 
You ran to catch up with Alex, finding him still talking to the attendant. In the most bitchy voice you could muster, you hugged him from the side and nestled your head into his shoulder. 
“I’m so happy we’re going on vacation babe, thank you!” 
His face fell, the attendant suddenly losing interest and suggesting the two of you find your seats. You intertwine your hands with his and hold it up, making a joke about how you two were inseparable. 
He suppresses the urge to fight you and instead screams internally, whisper yelling to you as you both sit. “You couldn’t let me be a Chad once? Just once!” 
“That’s what you get for slamming me on my ass earlier.”
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silverfoxizzy · 3 years ago
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Extras from my TGAA Avengers AU! I'll probably add more to this as I think of more. If I do. Because i am a very inconsistent person and might just leave this AU untouched until AA7 comes out and I get back into Ace Attorney.
POSSIBLE SPOILERS FOR THE GREAT ACE ATTORNEY CHRONICLES!!! FINISH THE GAMES FIRST!!!
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The team's code names on missions are as follows: Cap(Barok), Hare(Herlock), Mouse(Susato), Hawk(Ryunosuke), Red(Kazuma), Doc(Rei) and Falcon(Gina)
Sholmes's private Baker Street A.I. is called IRENE, based on The Woman Irene Adler of course. She was a witty nanny of his that lasted the longest, and he misses her a lot. IRENE only operates at Baker Street and instead communicates with a second A.I. The second A.I for missions in the Iron Man suit or anything involving Sholmes Industries is WILSON, who is named after John Wilson, Sholmes' mentor and the tech genius present during the super soldier project. He isn't quite as developed as IRENE. Both the real life counterparts have passed away.
When still living in London, Ryuu would sometimes get mugged on the way home. He fended them off with ease, but Sholmes still had a heart attack when he got home with several bruises. They designed him a special panic button system so they could be more prepared in the future. One push of the button means he got attacked, but he could handle the fight. Two pushes though, meant he needed Sholmes to get to him ASAP as he either couldn't handle the fight or was badly injured.
Ryuu can't sleep in a normal bed. It's too close to the ground for him and he always has flashbacks or nightmares. Herlock first discovered this when he caught Ryuu sleeping on top of a wardrobe instead of his own bed. They designed him a loft in his room that had easy access to the building's ventilation system to make him feel safer. It also inadvertently makes it easier for Ryuu to spy on people.
Ryuu ended up going to middle and high school, although he was certainly advanced on many subjects. Partnered with the fact that he had a world genius as a dad tutor, and he probably didn't need to go to school. He absolutely loved taking language classes though, and managed to push a few of his other classes out of his schedule so he could learn more languages. 
Karuma is a small katana-themed knife (or so everyone thinks) that was one of the only things left on Genshin's body. SHIELD assumes it's a family thing, because it's too dull to be used as a weapon. Kazuma keeps it in his room at Baker Street. (Sholmes couldn't help but think of old rumors, that during hours of need Genshin Asogi somehow wielded a mighty katana that appeared out of thin air and dissappeared just as quickly. But those rumors surely didn't have anything to do with this suspicious knife, did they?)
Kaz and Ryuu met when Kazuma hurt himself in a training room, and Ryuu was watching through the vents. Ryuu wrapped a red cloth around the wound and distracted Kazu with tongue twisters (that annoyed the man greatly since he couldn't repeat them) until they got to medical. Kazuma tried to return the cloth after he cleaned it, but Ryuu refused it, so Kazuma took the cloth everywhere as a sign of his gratitude.
Hey, did you notice that Klint almost instantly gains some memories back when he looks at the loves of his life? Hehe
Don't you just love making AUs of AUs? By that I mean an AU where everything goes even MORE right (I love fluff sue me) and Herlock, Genshin, and Yujin being shadowed by their Murdery Teenage Children. I can't get it out of my head. 
Sholmes getting insulted by some narcissistic politician and that politician gets politely OBLITERATED (with words) by a pissed off Ryunosuke. Kazuma's resting b*tch face terrifies everyone, meanwhile Genshin is like "why is everyone so cooperative in my investigations all of a sudden?" Yujin dealing with misogynistic council members and double checking with his daughter, who has killed several people before, about their ideas. Someone tries to attack any of the three adults and their kids go full on Attack Mode. Barok and Albert came up with the group name while talking about them. Albert wanted to know why Kazuma wasn't with his dad but couldn't ask where "Agent Asogi" was so he instead asked where was Genshin's "murdery… teenage child" was while Barok facepalmed with embarrassment. The kids think the name is really funny.
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ariainstars · 5 years ago
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Thank You, Disney Lucasfilm… For Destroying My Dreams
Warning: longer post.
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So… I watched The Rise of Skywalker on Disney+ a few weeks ago. Again.
Sigh.
I guess it has its good sides. But professional critics tend to dislike it and even the general audience doesn’t go crazy for it. I wonder why?
  The Fantasy
When his saga became a groundbreaking pop phenomenon in the 1970es, George Lucas reportedly said that he wanted to tell fairy tales again in world that no longer seemed to offer young people a chance to grow up with them. The fact that his saga was met with such unabashed, international enthusiasm proves that he was right: people long for fairy tales no matter how old they are and what culture they belong to.
“Young people today don’t have a fantasy life anymore, not the way we did… All they’ve got is Kojak and Dirty Harry. All the films they see are movies of disasters and insecurity and realistic violence.” (George Lucas)
I’ve been a Star Wars fan for more than thirty years. I love the Original Trilogy but honestly it did not make me dream much, perhaps because when I saw it the trilogy was already complete. The Prequel Trilogy also did not inspire my fantasy.
The Last Jedi accomplished something that no TV show, book or film had managed in years: it made me dream. The richness of colorful characters, multifaceted themes, unexpected developments, intriguing relationships was something I had not come across in a long time: it fascinated me. I felt like a giddy teenager reading up meta’s, writing my own and imagining all sorts of beautiful endings for the saga for almost two years.
So if there’s something The Rise of Skywalker can pride itself on for me, it’s that it crushed almost every dream I had about it. The few things I had figured out – Rey’s fall to the Dark, Ben Solo’s redemption, the connection between them - did not even make me happy because they were tainted by the flatness of the storytelling reducing the Force to a superpower again (like the general audience seems to believe it is), and its deliberate ignoring of almost all messages of The Last Jedi.
Many fans of the Original Trilogy also were disillusioned by the saga over the decades and ranted at the studios for “destroying their childhood”. Now we, the fans of the sequels and in particular of The Last Jedi, are in the same situation… but the thought doesn’t make the pill much easier to swallow. What grates on my nerves is the feeling that someone trampled on my just newly found dreams like a naughty child kicking a doll’s house apart. Why give us something to dream of in the first place, then? To a certain extent I can understand that many fans would angrily assume that Disney Lucasfilm made the Sequel Trilogy for the purpose of destroying their idea of the saga. The point is that they had their happy ending, while every dream the fans of the Sequel Trilogy may have had was shattered with this unexpectedly flat and hollow final note.
I know many fans who dislike the Prequel Trilogy heartily. I also prefer the Original Trilogy, but I find the prequels all right in their own way, also since I gave them some thought. However, it can’t be denied that they lack the magic spark which made the Original Trilogy so special. Which makes sense since they are not a fairy tale but ultimately a tragedy, but in my opinion it’s the one of the main reasons why the Prequel Trilogy never was quite so successful, or so beloved.
Same goes for Rogue One, Solo, or Clone Wars. They’re ok in their way, but not magical.
The sequel trilogy started quite satisfyingly with The Force Awakens, but for me, the actual bomb dropped with The Last Jedi. Reason? It was a magical story. It had the spark again that I had missed in the new Star Wars stories for decades! And it was packed full of beautiful messages and promises.
The Force is not a superpower belonging solely to the Jedi Anyone can be a hero. Even the greatest heroes can fail, but they will still be heroes. Hope is like the sun: if you only believe in it when you see it you’ll never make it through the night. Failure is the greatest teacher. It’s more important to save the light than to seem a hero. No one is never truly gone. War is only a machine. Dark Side and Light Side can be unbeatable if they are allies. Save what you love instead of destroying what you hate.
Naively, I assumed the trilogy would continue and end in that same magical way. And then came The Rise of Skywalker… which looks and feels like a Marvel superhero story at best and an over-long videogame at worst.
Chekov’s Gun
“Remove everything that has no relevance to the story. If you say in the first chapter that there is a rifle hanging on the wall, in the second or third chapter it absolutely must go off. If it’s not going to be fired, it shouldn’t be hanging there.”
(Anton Chekov, 1860 - 1904)
If you show an important looking prop and don’t put it to use, it leaves the audience feeling baffled. There is a huge difference between a story’s setup, and the audience’s feeling of entitlement. E.g. many viewers expected Luke to jump right back into the fray in Episode VIII, because that’s what a hero does, isn’t it? The cavalry comes and saves the day. And instead, we met a disillusioned elderly hermit who is tired of the ways of the Jedi. But there was no actual reason for disappointment: in Episode VII it was very clearly said (through Han, his best friend) that Luke had gone into exile on purpose, feeling responsible for his failure in teaching a new generation of Jedi. It would have been more than stupid to show him as an all-powerful and all-knowing man who kills the bad guys. Sorry but who expected that was a victim to his own prejudice.
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A promise left unfulfilled is a different story. The Last Jedi set up a lot of promises that didn’t come true in The Rise of Skywalker: Balance as announced by the Jedi temple mosaic, a new Jedi Order hinted at by Luke on Crait, a good ending for Ben and Rey set up by the hand-touching scene which was opposite to Anakin’s and Padmés wedding scene. Many fans were annoyed about the Canto Bight sequence. I liked it because it felt like the set-up for a lot of important stuff: partnership between Finn and Rose whom we see working together excellently, freedom for the enslaved children (one of whom is Force-sensitive), DJ and Rose expressing what makes wars in general foolish and beside the point. So if we, the fans of Episode VIII, now feel angry and let down, I daresay it’s not due to entitlement. We were announced magical outcomes and not just pew-pew.
The Star Wars saga never repeated itself but always developed and enlarged its themes, so it was to be expected that delving deeper, uncomfortable truths would come out: wars don’t start out of nowhere, and they don’t flare up and continue for decades for the same reason. In order to find Balance, the Jedi’s and the Skywalker family’s myths needed to be dismantled. Which is not necessarily bad as long it is explained how things came to this, and a better alternative is offered. The prequels explained the old political order and the beginnings of the Skywalker family, and announced that the next generation would do better. The sequels hardly explained anything about the 30 years that passed since our heroes won the battle against the Empire, and while The Last Jedi hinted at the future a lot, The Rise of Skywalker seemed to make a point of ignoring all of it.
  The Skywalker Family Is Obliterated. Why?
Luke was proven right that his nephew would mean the end of everything he loved. The lineage of the Chosen One is gone. His grandson had begun where Vader had ended - tormented, pale and with sad eyes - and he met the same fate. Luke, Han, Leia, all sacrificed themselves to bring Ben Solo back for nothing. Him being the reincarnation of the Chosen One and getting a new chance should have been meaningful for all of them; instead, he literally left the scepter to Rey who did nothing to deserve it: merely because she killed the Bad Guy does not mean she will do a better job than the family whose name and legacy she proudly takes over.
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I do hope there was a good reason if the sequels did not tell “The New Adventures of Luke, Leia and Han” and instead showed us a broken family on the eve of its wipeout. It would have been much easier, and more fun for the audience, to bring the trio back again after a few years and pick up where they had left. Instead we had to watch their son, nephew and heir go his grandfather’s way - born with huge power, branded as Meant to Be Dangerous from the start, tried his best to be a Jedi although he wanted to be a pilot, never felt accepted, abandoned in the moment of his greatest need, went to his abuser because he was the only one to turn to, became a criminal, his own family (in Anakin’s case: Obi-Wan and Yoda) trained the person who was closest to him to kill him, sacrificed himself for this person and died. And in his case, it’s particularly frustrating because Kylo Ren wasn’t half as impressive a villain as Vader, and Ben Solo had a very limited time of heroism and personal fulfilment, contrarily to Anakin when he was young.
The impact of The Rise of Skywalker was traumatic for some viewers. I know of adolescents and adults, victims of family abandonment and abuse, who identified with Ben: they were told that you can never be more than the sum of your abuse and abandonment, and that they’re replaceable if they’re not “good”. Children identifying with Rey were told that their parents might sell them away for “protection”. Rey was not conflicted, she had a few doubts but overall, she was cool about everything she did, so she got everything on a silver platter; that’s why as a viewer, after a while you stopped caring for her. Her antagonist was doomed from birth because he dared to question the choices other people made for him. It seems that in the Star Wars universe, you can only “rise” if you’re either a criminal but cool because you’ve always got a bucket over your head (Vader / the Mandalorian) or are a saint-like figure (Luke / Rey).
One of Obi-Wan’s first actions in A New Hope is cutting off someone’s arm who was only annoying him; Han Solo, ditto. These were no acts of self-defense. The Mandalorian is an outlaw. Yet they are highly popular. Why? Because they always keep their cool, so anything they do seems justified. Young Anakin was hated, Jake Lloyd and Hayden Christensen attacked for his portrayal. For the same reason many fans feel that Luke is the least important of the original trio although basically the Original Trilogy is his story: it seems the general audience hates nothing more than emotionality in a guy. They want James Bond, Batman or Indiana Jones as the lead. Padmé loved Anakin because she always saw the good little boy he once was in him; his attempts at impressing her with his flirting or his masculinity failed. Kylo tried to impress Rey with his knowledge and power, but she fled from him - she wanted the gentle, emphatic young man who had listened to her when she felt alone. Good message. But both died miserably, and Ben didn’t even get anything but a kiss. Realizing that his “not being as strong as Darth Vader” might actually be a strength of its own would have meant much more.
The heroes of the Original Trilogy had their adventures together and their happy ending; the heroes of the Prequel Trilogy also had good times and accomplishments in their youth, before everything went awry. Rey, Finn and Poe feel like their friendship hardly got started; Rose was almost obliterated from the narrative; and Ben Solo seems to have had only one happy moment in his entire life. Of course it’s terrible that he committed patricide (even if it was under coercion), but Anakin / Vader himself had two happy endings in the Prequel Trilogy before he became the monster we know so well. Not to mention Clone Wars, where he has heroic moments unnumbered.
The Skywalker family is obliterated without Balance in the Force, and the young woman who inherited all doesn’t seem to have learned any lesson from all this. The Original Trilogy became a part of pop culture among other things because its ending was satisfying. We can hardly be expected to be satisfied with an ending where our heroes are all dead and the heir of their worst enemy takes over. What good was the happy ending of the Original Trilogy for if they didn’t learn enough from their misadventures to learn how to protect one single person - their son and nephew, their future?
For a long time, I also thought that the saga was about Good vs. Evil. Watching the prequels again, I came to the conclusion that it is rather about Love vs. War. And now, considering as a whole, I believe it to be essentially Jedi against Skywalker. The ending, as it is now, says that both fractions lost: they annihilated one another, leaving a third party in charge, who believes to be both but actually knows very little about them.
Star Wars and Morality
After 9 films and 42 years, it still is not possible to make the general audience accept that it is wrong to divide people between Good and Evil in the first place. The massive rejection of both prequels and sequels, which have moral grey zones galore, shows it.
It is also not possible without being accused of actual blasphemy in the same fandom, to say the plain truth that no Skywalker ever was a Jedi at heart. As their name says, they’re pilots. Luke was the last and strongest of all Jedi because he always was first and foremost himself. Anakin was crushed by the Jedi’s attempts to stifle his feelings. His grandson, too. A Force-sensitive person ought to have the choice whether they want to be a Jedi or not; they ought not to be taught to suppress their emotions and live only on duty, without really caring for other people; and they ought to grow up feeling in a safe and loving environment, not torn away from their families in infancy, indoctrinated and provided with a light sabre (a deadly weapon) while they’re still small. A Jedi order composed of child soldiers or know-it-all’s does not really help anybody.
The original Star Wars saga was about love and friendship; although many viewers did not want to understand that message. The prequels portrayed the Jedi as detached and arrogant and Anakin Skywalker sympathetically, a huge disappointment for who only accepts stories of the “lonesome cowboy” kind. The Last Jedi was so hated that The Rise of Skywalker backpedaled: sorry, of course you’re right, here you have your “hero who knows everything better and fixes everything for you on a silver platter”. The embarrassing antihero, who saves the girl who was the only person showing him some human compassion, can die miserably in the process and is not even mourned.
Honestly: I was doubtful whether it would be adequate to give Ben Solo a happy ending after the patricide. I guess letting him die was the easiest way out for the authors to escape censorship. (I even wrote this in a review on amazon about The Last Jedi, before I delved deeper into the saga’s themes.) The messages we got now are even worse.
Kylo Ren / Ben Solo
A parent can replace a child if they’re not the way they expect them to be. A victim of lifelong psychical and physical abuse can only find escape in death, whether he damns or redeems himself. An introspective, sensitive young man is a loser no matter how hard he tries either way. A whole family can sacrifice itself to save their heir, he dies anyway.
Rey
Self-righteousness is acceptable as long as you find a scapegoat for your own failings. Overconfidence justifies anything you do. You can’t carve your way as a female child of “nobodies”, you have to descend from someone male and powerful even if that someone is the devil incarnate. You are a “strong female” if you choose to be lonely; you need neither a partner nor friends.
In General
Star Wars is not about individual choices, loyalty, friendship and love, it is a classic Western story with a lonesome cowboy (in this case: cowgirl) at its centre. Satisfied? 
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The father-son-relationship between Vader and Luke mirrors the Biblical story of Cain and Abel, saying that whoever we may want to kill is, in truth, our kin, which makes a clear separation in Good and Evil impossible. The “I am your father” scene is so infamous by now that even non-fans are aware of it; but this relationship between evil guy and good guy, as well as the plot turns where the villain saves the hero and that the hero discards his weapon are looked upon rather as weird narrative quirks instead of a moral. 
In  an action movie fan, things are simple: good guy vs. bad guy, the good guy (e.g. James Bond may be a murderer and a misogynist, but that’s ok because he’s cool about it) kills the bad guy, ka-boom, end of story. But Star Wars is a parable, an ambitious project told over decades of cinema, and a multilayered story with recurring themes.
A fairy tale ought to have a moral. The moral of both Original Trilogy and Prequel Trilogy was compassionate love - choose it and you can end a raging conflict, reject it and you will cause it. What was the moral of the Sequel Trilogy? You can be the offspring of the galaxy’s worst terror and display a similar attitude, but pose as a Jedi and kill unnecessarily, and it’s all right; descend from Darth Vader (who himself was a victim long before he became a culprit) and whether you try to become a Jedi trained by Luke Skywalker or a Sith trained by his worst enemy, you will end badly?
Both original and prequel trilogy often showed “good” people making bad choices and the “bad ones” making the right choices. To ensure lasting peace, no Force user ought to be believe that he must choose one side and then stick to it for the rest of his life: both sides need one another. The prequels took 3 films to convey this message, though not saying so openly. The Last Jedi said it out clearly - and the authors almost had their heads ripped off by affronted fans, resulting in The Rise of Skywalker’s fan service. It’s not like Luke, Han and Leia were less heroic in the Sequel Trilogy, on the contrary, they gave everything they had to their respective cause. They were not united, and they were more human than they had once been. Apparently, that’s an affront.
The Jedi are no perfect heroes and know-it-all’s and they never were, the facts are there for everyone to see. Padmé went alone and pregnant to get her husband out of Mustafar - and she almost succeeded - although she knew what he had done and that he was perfectly capable of it (he had told her of the Tusken village massacre himself) because she still saw the good little boy he had been in him; Obi-Wan left him amputated and burning in the lava, although he had raised Anakin like a small brother and the latter had repeatedly saved his life. But Padmé was not a Jedi, so I guess she still had some human decency. Neither Obi-Wan nor Yoda lifted a finger for the oppressed populations of the galaxy during the Empire, waiting instead for Anakin’s son to grow up so they could trick him into committing patricide. Neither Luke nor Leia did anything for their own son and nephew while he became the scourge of the galaxy, damning his soul by committing crime after crime. On Exegol, Rey heard the voices of all Jedi encouraging her to fight Palpatine to death. After that, they left her to die alone, and the alleged “bad guy”, who had already saved her soul from giving in to Palpatine’s lures, had to save her life by giving her his own. The Jedi merely know that “their side” has to win, no matter the cost for anyone’s life, sanity, integrity or happiness.
Excuse me, these are simple facts. How anyone can still believe that the Jedi were super-powerful heroes who always win or all-knowing wizards who are always right is beyond me. Luke, the last and strongest of them, like a bright flickering of light before the ultimate end, showed us that the best of men can fail. There is nothing wrong with that in itself. But it is wrong and utterly frustrating when all of the failure never leads to anything better. If Rey means to rebuild the Jedi order to something better than it was, there was no hint at that whatsoever.
  And What Now?
The Last Jedi hit theatres only 2 years before The Rise of Skywalker, and I can’t imagine that the responsible authors all have forgotten how to make competent work in the meantime; more so considering that Solo or The Mandalorian are solid work. Episode IX is thematically so painfully flat it seems like they wanted us to give up on the saga on purpose. The last instalment of a 42-year-old saga ought to have been the best and most meaningful. I had heard already decades ago that the saga was supposed to have 9 chapters, so I was not among who protested against the sequels thinking that they had been thought up to make what had come before invalid. I naively assumed a larger purpose. But Episode IX only seems to prove these critics perfectly right.
The last of the flesh and blood of the Chosen One is dead without having “finished what his grandfather started”?
Still no Balance in the Force?
And worst of all, Palpatine’s granddaughter taking over, having proven repeatedly that she is not suited for the task?
Sorry, this “ending” is absurd. I have read fanfiction that was better written and more interesting. And, most of all, less depressing. I was counting on a conclusion that showed that the Force has all colours and nuances, and that it’s not limited to the black-and-white view “we against them”. That’s the ending all of us fans would have deserved, instead of catering the daddy issues of the part of the audience who doesn’t want stories other than those of the “lonesome cowboy” kind. I myself grew up on Japanese anime, maybe that’s one of the reasons why I can’t stand guys like James Bond or Batman and why I think you don’t need “a great hero who fixes the situation” but that group spirit and communication are way more important.
It was absolutely unexpected that Disney, the production company whose trademark are happy endings and family stories, would end this beloved and successful saga after almost half a century on such a hollow note. Why tell first a beautiful fairy tale and then leave the audience on a hook for 35 years to continue first with a tragedy (which at least was expected) and then with another (unexpected one)? And this story is supposed to be for children? Like children would understand all of the subtext, and love sad, cautionary tales. Children, as well as the general audience, first of all want to be entertained! No one wants to watch the legendary Skywalker family be obliterated and a Palpatine take over. The sequels were no fun anymore; we’ve been left with another open ending and hardly an explanation about what happened in the 30 years in between. If you want to tell a cautionary tale, you should better warn the general audience beforehand.
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The Original Trilogy is so good because it’s entertaining and offers room for thought for who wants to think about its deeper themes, and also leaves enough space for dreams. Same goes for the first two films of the Sequel Trilogy; but precisely the last, which should have wrapped up the saga, leaves us with a bitter aftertaste and dozens of questions marks. 
We as the audience believe that a story, despite the tragic things that happen, must go somewhere; we get invested into the characters, we root for them, we want to see them happy in the end. (The authors of series like Girls, How I Met Your Mother or Game of Thrones ought to be reminded of that, too.) I was in contact with children and teenagers saying that the Sequel Trilogy are “boring”; and many, children or adults, who were devastated by its concluson. There is a difference between wanting to tell a cautionary tale and playing the audience for fools. This trilogy could have become legendary like the Original Trilogy, had it fulfilled its promises instead of “keeping it low” with its last chapter. Who watches a family or fantasy story or a romantic / comedic sitcom wants to escape into another world, not to be hit over his head with a mirror to his own failings, and the ones of the society he’s living in. Messages are all right, but they ought not to go at the cost of the audience’s satisfaction about the about the people and narrative threads they have invested in for years.
This isn’t a family story: but children probably didn’t pester the studios with angry e-mails and twitter messages etc. They simply counted on a redemption arc and happy ending, and they were right, because they’re not as stupid as adults are. I have read and watched many a comment from fans who hate The Last Jedi. Many of these fans couldn’t even pinpoint what their rage was all about, they only proved to be stuck with the original trilogy and unwilling to widen their horizon. But at least their heroes had had their happy ending: The Rise of Skywalker obliterated the successes of all three generations of Skywalkers.
If the film studios wanted to tease us, they’ve excelled. If they expect the general audience to break their heads over the sequels’ metaphysics, they have not learned from the reactions to the prequels that most viewers take these films at face value. Not everybody is elbows-deep in the saga, or willing to research about it for months, and / or insightful enough to see the story’s connections. Which is why many viewers frown at the narrative and believe the Sequel Trilogy was just badly written. This trilogy could have become legendary like the Original Trilogy, had it fulfilled its promises instead of “keeping it low” with its last chapter. As it is now, the whole trilogy is hanging somewhere in the air, with neither a past nor a future to be tied in with.
The prequels already had the flaw of remaining too obscure: most fans are not aware that Anakin had unwillingly killed his wife during the terrible operation that turned him into Darth Vader, sucking her life out of her through the Force: most go by “she died of a broken heart”. So although one scene mirrors the other, it is not likely that most viewers will understand what Rey’s resurrection meant. And: Why did Darth Maul kill Qui-Gon Jinn? What did the Sith want revenge for? Who was behind Shmi’s abduction and torture? Who had placed the order for the production of the clones, and to what purpose? We can imagine or try to reconstruct the answers, but nothing is confirmed by the story itself.
The sequels remained even more in the dark, obfuscating what little explanation we got in The Rise of Skywalker with quick pacing and mind-numbing effects.
Kylo Ren had promised his grandfather that “he would finish what he started”: he did not. Whatever one can say of this last film, it did not bring Balance in the Force. What’s worse, the subject was not even breached. It was hinted at by the mosaic on the floor of the Prime Jedi Temple on Ahch-To, but although Luke and Rey were sitting on its border, they never seemed to see what was right under their noses. It remains inexplicable why it was there for everyone to see in the first place.
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We might argue that Ben finished what his grandfather started by killing (or better, causing the death of) the last Jedi, who this one couldn’t kill because he was his own son; but leaving Rey in charge, he helped her finish what her grandfather had started. The irony could hardly be worse.
Episode IX looks like J.J. Abrams simply completed what they started with Episode VII, largely ignoring the next film as if it was always planned to do so. We, the angry and disappointed fans of The Last Jedi, may believe it was due to some of the general audience’s angry backlash, but honestly: the studios aren’t that dumb. They had to know that Episode VIII would be controversial and that many fans would hate it. The furious reactions were largely a disgrace, but no one can make me believe that they were totally unexpected. Nor can anyone convince me that The Rise of Skywalker was merely an answer to the small but very loud part of the audience who hated The Last Jedi: a company with the power and the returns of Disney Lucasfilm does not need to buckle down before some fan’s entitlement and narrowmindedness out of fear of losing money. And if they do, it was foolish to make Rey so perfect that she becomes almost odious, and to let the last of the Skywalker blood die a meaningless death. (Had he saved the Canto Bight children and left them with Rey, at least he would have died with honor; and she, the child left behind by her parents, would have had a task to dedicate herself to.)
The only reason I can find for this odd ending is that it’s meant to prepare the way for Rian Johnson’s new trilogy, which - hopefully - will finally be about Balance. We as the audience don’t know what’s going on behind the doors. Filmmaking is a business like any other, i.e. based on contracts; and I first heard that Rian Johnson had negotiated a trilogy of his own since before Episode VIII hit theatres. Maybe he kept all the rights of intellectual property to his own film, including that he would finish the threads he picked up and close the narrative circles he opened, and only he; and that his alleged working on “something completely different” is deliberately misleading.
Some viewers love the original trilogy, some love the prequels, some like both; but I hardly expect anyone to love the sequel trilogy as a whole. What with the first instalment “letting the past die, killing it if they had to”, the second hinting at a promising future and the third patched on at the very last like some sort of band-aid, it was not coherent. I heard the responsible team for Game of Thrones even dropped their work, producing a dissatisfying, quickly sewn together last season, for this new Star Wars project and thereby disappointing millions of GoT fans; I hope they are aware of the expectations they have loaded upon them. George Lucas’ original trilogy had its faults, but but though there was no social media yet in his time, at least he was still close enough to the audience to give them what they needed, if not necessarily wanted. (Some fans can’t accept that Luke and Leia are siblings to this day, even if honestly, it was the very best plot twist to finish their story in a satisfying way.)
I’m hoping for now that The Last Jedi was not some love bombing directed at the more sentimental viewers but a promise that will be fulfilled. “Wrapping up” a saga by keeping the flattest, least convincing chapter for last is bad form. Star Wars did not become a pop phenomenon by accident, but because the original story was convincing and satisfying. Endings like these will hardly make anyone remember a story fondly, on the contrary, the audience will move to another fandom to forget their disappointment.
On a side note, I like The Mandalorian, exactly for the reason that that is a magical story; not as much as the original trilogy, but at least a little. Of course, I’m glad it was produced. But it’s a small consolation prize after the mess that supposedly wrapped up the original saga after 9 films.
We’re Not Blind, You Know…
- Though Kylo Ren (Ben Solo) has Darth Vader’s stature, his facial features are practically opposite to Vader’s creepy mask. This should have foreshadowed that his life should have gone the other way, instead of more or less repeating itself. - As a villain Kylo was often unconvincing; by all logic he should have been a good father figure. (Besides, Star Wars films or series never work unless there is a strong father or father figure at their center.)
- Like Vader, Kylo Ren was redeemed, but not rehabilitated. Who knows who may find his broken mask somewhere now and, not knowing the truth, promise “I will finish what you started”. - The hand-touching scene on Ahch-To which was visually opposite to Anakin’s and Padmé’s should not have predicted another tragedy but a happy ending for them. - The Canto Bight sequence was announcing reckoning for the weapon industry and freedom for the enslaved children. It also showed how well Finn and Rose fit together. - Rey was a good girl before she started on her adventures. Like Anakin or Luke, she did not need to become a Jedi to be strong or generous or heroic. - Rey summons Palpatine after one year of training. Kylo practically begged for his grandfather’s assistance for years, to no avail. Her potential for darkness is obviously much stronger. - Dark Rey’s light sabre looked like a fork, Kylo’s like a cross. - The last time all Jedi and Sith were obliterated leaving only Luke in charge, things went awry. Now we have a Palpatine masquerading as a Skywalker and believing she’s a Jedi. Rey is a usurper and universally cheered after years of war, like her grandfather. - The broom boy of Canto Bight looked like he was sweeping a stage and announcing “Free the stage, it’s time for us, the children.”
Rey failed in all instances where Luke had proved himself (so much for feminism and her being a Mary Sue): - Luke had forgiven his father despite all the pain he had inflicted on him. She stabbed the „bad guy”, who had repeatedly protected and comforted her, to death. - Luke never asked Vader to help the Rebellion or to turn to the Light Side, he only wanted him back as his father. She assumed that you could make Ben Solo turn, give up the First Order and join the Resistance for her. She thought of her friends and of her own validation, not of him. - Luke had made peace by choosing peace. Rey fought until the bitter end. - Luke had thrown his weapon away before Palpatine. Rey picked up a second weapon. (And both of them weren’t even her own.) - Luke had mourned his dead father. Rey didn’t shed a tear for the man she is bonded to by the Force. - Luke went back to his friends to celebrate the new peace with them. Rey went back letting everyone celebrate her like the one who saved the galaxy on her own, she who were tempted to become the new evil ruler of the galaxy and had to rely on the alleged Bad Guy to save both her soul and her body. - Luke had embodied compassion when Palpatine was all about hatred. Where he chose love and faith in his father, she chose violence and fear. - Luke had briefly fallen prey to the Dark Side but it made him realize that he had no right to judge his father. Rey’s fall to the Dark Side did not make her wiser. - Rey has no change of mind on finding out that she’s Palpatine’s flesh and blood, nor after she has stabbed Kylo. Luke had to face himself on learning that he had almost become a patricide. Rey does not have to face herself: the revelation of her ancestry is cushioned by Luke’s and Leia’s support. Rey is and remains an uncompromising person who hardly learns from her faults.
This is cheating on the audience. And it's not due to feminism or Rey being some sort of “Mary Sue” the way many affronted fans claim. Kylo never was truly a villain, Rey is not a heroine, and this is not a happy ending. The Jedi, with their stuck-up conviction “only we must win”, have failed all over again. The Skywalker family was obliterated leaving their worst enemy in charge.  Rey is supposed to be a “modern” heroine which young girls can take as an example? No, thank you. Not after this last film has made of her. Padmé was a much better role model, combining intelligence with strength and goodness and also female grace. The world does not need entitled female brats.
Bonus: What Made The Rise of Skywalker a Farce
- The Force Awakens was an ok film and The Last Jedi (almost) a masterpiece. The Rise of Skywalker was a cartoon. No wonder a lot of the acting felt and looked wooden. - “I will earn your brother’s light sabre.” She’s holding his father’s sabre. - Kylo in The Last Jedi: “Let the past die. Kill it if, you have to.” Beginning with me? - Rey ends up on Tatooine. - The planet both Anakin and Luke ardently wanted to leave. - Luke had promised his nephew that he would be around for him. - Nope. - Rey had told Ben that she had seen his future. What future was that - “you will be a hero for ten minutes, get a kiss and then die? (And they didn’t even get a love theme.) - “The belonging you seek is not behind you, it is ahead.” On a desert planet with a few ghosts. What of the ocean she used to dream about? - Ben and Rey were both introduced as two intensely lonely people searching for belonging. We learn they are a Force dyad, and then they are torn apart again. - Why was Ben named for Obi-Wan Kenobi in the first place, if they have absolutely nothing in common? - The Throne Room battle scene in The Last Jedi was clearly showing that when they are in balance, Light Side and Dark Side are unbeatable. Why did the so-called “Light Side” have to win again, in The Rise of Skywalker, instead of finding balance? - Luke’s scene on Ahch-To was so ridiculously opposite to his attitude in The Last Jedi that by now I believe he was a fantasy conjectured by her. (Like Ben’s vision of his father.) - Anakin’s voice among the other Jedi’s. - He was a renegade, for Force’s sake. - The kiss between two females. - More fan service, to appease those who pretended that not making Poe and Finn a couple was a sign of homophobia. - We see the Knights of Ren, but we learn absolutely nothing about them or Kylo’s connection with them. - Rose Tico’s invalidation. - A shame after what the actress had gone through because for the fans she was “not Star-Wars-y” (chubby and lively instead of wiry and spitfire). - Finn’s and Rose’s relationship. - Ignored without any explanation. - Finn may or may not be Force-sensitive. - If he is: did he abandon the First Order not due to his own free will but because of some higher willpower? Great. - General Hux was simply obliterated. - In The Force Awakens he was an excellent foil to Kylo Ren; no background story, no humanization for him. - Chewie’s and 3PO’s faked deaths. - Useless additional drama. - The Force Awakens was a bow before the classic trilogy. The Rise of Skywalker kicked its remainders to pieces. - The Prequel Trilogy ended with hope, the Original Trilogy with love. The Sequel Trilogy ends on a blank slate. - “We are what they grow beyond.” The characters of the Sequel Trilogy did not grow beyond the heroes of the Original Trilogy. - The Jedi did not learn from their mistakes and were obliterated. The Skywalker family understood the mistakes they had made too late. Now they’re gone, too.
  P.S. While I was watching The Rise of Skywalker my husband came in asked me since when I like Marvel movies. I said “That’s not a Marvel movie, it’s Star Wars.” I guess that says enough.
P.P.S. For the next trilogy, please at least let the movies hit theatres in May again instead of December. a) It’s tradition for Star Wars films, b) Whatever happens, at least you won’t ruin anyone’s Christmases. Thank you.
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kryptsune · 4 years ago
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Souly Damned Saturdays!~
🌼 Heya! Today we are going to look at the King of the Infernal real, Nas. Along with this info we will be looking at some interesting forces in the Souly Damned universe! Today is Nas day X’D. Let’s get to it! As always my ask box is open!
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~King Profile:~
~Prince Profile:~ True Name: Nasaros Alias Names: N/A Nicknames: Nas Soul Flower Type: Narcissus (daffodil)         Color Type: Orange/magenta with burnt edges Infernal Hierarchy: King Age Order: Eldest Familiar Form: Lion/ Stag (Phoenix) True Form Appearance Description:         ~Skeletal in appearance         ~Prominent fangs         ~Wears a twisted metal crown         ~Fingers with clawed tips         ~Orange tongue         ~ Spaded almost arrow head like skeletal tail         ~ Three sets of wings   
Human Form Physical Description:      ~Hair Color: Ashy      ~Hair Style: Short with a longer “tail” in the back that falls to his mid back      ~Eye Color: Orange/Magenta Heterochromia      ~Skin Tone: Pale      ~Contract symbol mark placement: N/A      ~Height: 6’2”
Special Abilities or Powers: All his brothers have and more
Before the Fall: 
The Infernal Realm has always existed alongside the Celestial and first Mortal Realm. Originally it was nothing but a prison for creatures of pure evil the same ones that are still considered legends. In this realm are also the imps, infernal blooded monsters with a taste for mortal kind. The Infernal bloods and Celestials have been warring for centuries. A realm closed off from the rest. In essence it is the true Hell. Darrius and his kin used to be the Celestial elite, directing the others. They were revered and looked up to before Darrius turned against his brother Sidriel believing that they should rule the mortal realm as well. His pride and arrogance would eventually be his downfall. 
Darrius’ Reign: 
During this time period  Darrius presided over his son's new territories in the mortal realm. There were no rules, no consequences; they were just able to do anything that they pleased. The Infernal Realm was split open causing chaos to stain the world. Even as his sons were stricken from the mortal realm they found a new refuge in the Realm they used to loathe. The same one that they had once fought wars over. Now they were the rulers of this damned realm. They locked away the Infernal beasts into the depths and took over and with the help of their incredible, yet corrupted, Celestial power the Infernals and their new king began to worm their way into the new mortal realm. Under Darrius they continued their old ways even with the new restrictions placed on them.
The King of The Infernal Realm:
Nasaros is the current king of Hell being the eldest son of his father. Just like his father his angelic blood makes him stand out above his younger siblings. He seems gentlemanly and rather laid back for someone of his status but do not let that fool you. Due to Nas’, blood, he is just as harsh if not more so than his fallen brothers. He is not actually a demon either but rather a fallen angel. He has a silver tongue keeping to flowery language. Nas has an egotistical air about him but it is more subtle. He has an extreme distaste for the Infernal kind as he does not consider himself one of their ilk. Therefore he is not tolerant of any kind of infraction. Demons that do not follow the rules are quickly dispatched without mercy. His abilities are not as well known as the brothers but it can be assumed he can utilize all his siblings abilities as well as some more Celestial ones. 
He tends to wear white in the majority of his clothing leaning more toward tailored tail coats and suits. An almost denial of what he has become. He has three sets of wings though they are rarely seen indicating he used to be a seraphim. In his younger years before he was crowned King he was the Prince of the Kingdom of Lust. He began to question the motives of his father asking himself if this was truly the path he desired. When he came to the opposite conclusion, not embracing this new hellish order his father was furious. In an effort to keep his eldest from “infecting” his younger siblings with his ideology he split his son's soul into two separate entities. One as the embodiment of the negative side of his sin and the other the more positive. This creates Naos and Saros. 
Unlike his father Nas seems to attempt to reform Hell in a way adding rules and regulations to the more unruly of his subjects. These rules mostly extend to those souls that are wrongly labeled as damned. He knows that any impurity leads the Celestial Realm to shut its gates on some of these souls with no hope for survival. Under Nas’ decree these souls are to not be harmed.   
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Naos: Out of the two Naos is the more gentle. He tends to be very shy when interacting with others only making his presence known when necessary. He is not the flirty type but rather the romantic if you manage to catch his affection and favor. His appearance causes him to wear darker colors like black. Unlike his unruly brother, Naos enjoys the peace and quiet. He is easily flustered. Sometimes he will sit in the garden and sing a soft little tune. His personality is very soft but he is also very possessive and overprotective.    
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Saros: If there was a complete opposite to Naos then Saros would be it. He is haughty, prideful, lavish, and over the top. His outgoing demeanor causes him to throw lavish banquets and parties surrounding himself with the elite of Hell. Saros is the negative aspect of lust. He is needy and uses pleasure as a manipulation tool. He drinks and sleeps around not giving it any thought. He is also possessive though it is more treating something like a trophy then someone to be treasured. He is the true embodiment of carnal pleasure and debauchery.
These two Princes, though two halves of one whole, eventually become one once more. This only happens though when Darrius is usurped and Nas takes the crown. He then goes on to reform the old Infernal ways impressing an almost Celestially similar level of organization and rule of law.
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The New Order:
The new shift in power causes some unrest among the denizens of Hell. Their old order was to corrupt and damn souls for all eternity no matter the cost. The spilling of blood was of no consequence. That however changes when Nas comes into power. His decree is that demons (his brothers included) should be conducting themselves with more decorum then they used to. No more earthly rampages. No more innocent deaths. The souls not meant for Hell are put under his protection. He cleans up Hell by holding demons accountable for their more sadistic tendencies. The humans have long since forgotten their presence. To them they are nothing more than superstition and Hollywood fabrication. The new global ability to communicate in mere seconds leaves them with a poor reputation. 
Nowadays they are known for making more deals. In fact under the royalty the most prestigious job in Hell are the deal makers. The demons that are associated with soul collection t is one way to gain more power as a demon. The more souls the stronger and potential more abilities gained as well. These demons appear on earth offering their services disguised as humans tempting wayward souls. The Dukes, Lords, and even Princes also do deals of a higher caliber though they rarely leave Hell (currently). It would take a very powerful soul for them to gain any interest even if they are summoned. An example of this would be during the 1920’s.
Each demon of high status also has a specific sigil used to summon them. It is, as stated previously, very dangerous and usually only 30% effective. Some demons, Crimson as an example, will gladly show up for a little bit of carnage or to mess with souls. Contrary to mortal belief demons do not take to sacrificing lightly in fact it is highly frowned upon. Any mortals of an occult stupid enough to try and summon any of them usually end up choking on their own blood. 
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The Red String of Fate:
The Red string of fate is a constant in the world that has consequences when altered. It is very similar to the idea that our destinies are intertwined with others and if that string is cut it creates a butterfly effect. Demons tend to do as they please but when it comes to altering the course of humanity it is a very harsh offense. Under the Prince's father this offense was minor but when Nas took control of the throne that sentence increased. A demon tampering with or severing the string of fate is exiled, banished, or executed. If one string is severed it is possible to re form however multiple could cause an apocalyptic event of biblical proportions. Contrary to human belief demons have no desire to obliterate earth. They rather like their little playground. Anything that would jeopardize the fate of either Hell or Earth is grave.
The Blood of the Innocent: 
Innocent souls subjected to the selectiveness of the Celestial elite are thrown into the Pit just by association with any type of demonic ritual. Innocents sacrificed for summoning are branded as corrupted and therefore unworthy to enter Heavens gates. These souls are considered pure and are housed in the Capital away from any demons that may cause them harm, especially that of children. If a mortal is sacrificed to a specific demon then that Prince is made responsible. This occurrence however is rare as the horrors that befall those that try this kind of act… are too horrible to describe. It takes someone really greedy or stupid to even attempt such a thing. 
Pure souls are constantly in danger as demons feel their power and have an almost instinctual desire to devour it. This is an outcome for those types of souls but the process is painless (if the demon in question desires it). It is better than living an eternity in Hell anyway. Some are kept at the palaces if a Prince sees fit though that is an even rarer occurrence than the former.
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