#source: the IT crowd

[uncorrectintamed]

Wei Wuxian: I'm here to drink wine and kick-ass and I just finished my wine.

[emoprincey]

Roman, trying to flirt: I like your glasses.

Logan: They're not for sale.

[lizzardwitch]

Heckyl: Kendall, do you have a moment? Kendall: No, I'm very busy, I don't want to go for a ride in a helicopter. Heckyl: Well, that wasn't what I was going to ask, actually. Kendall: What do you want then? Heckyl: Uhhh....something...work-related? Kendall: What department is this? Heckyl: Sorry? Kendall: Well, if it's work-related, then obviously you'll know what department this is. What department is this? *Heckyl glances at Chase & Riley* Heckyl: Some sort of...homosexual department?

[incorrectafcrichmond]

Barbara: Hooray, he's kicked the ball. The ball's over there now.

Keeley: That guy has it now. That's an interesting development. Maybe he'll kick the ball?

Barbara: He has indeed. And apparently and apparently that deserves a round of applause

Keeley: How long do football matches last?

Barbara: A billion hours, apparently.

[liverobinreaction]

Tim: It's like my dad always says: you should never open the door.

Cassie: What do you mean?

Tim: An unopened door is a happy door, so we never answer ours when someone knocks.

Kon: What, so you all just sit there?

Tim: Yes.

Cassie: So the doorbell goes... and you all just sit there... until the person goes away?

Tim: Yes.

Cassie: What if it's important! What if it's good news?

Tim: This is Gotham, Cassie. It's not someone with cake. Unless that cake is made of Joker Gas and knives.

[g1rlr0b1n]

Damian: I never know what to say to people at funerals.

Billy: neither do I, I'm terrible.

Jon: Just say "I'm sorry for your loss" then move on

Damian: oh ok.

*later at a funeral*

Damian: I'm sorry for your loss. Move on.

[incorrectuksies]

elmer, looking at race: why are you giving me the secret signal to shut up?

[incorrecthungergamesquotes]

Why are you giving me the secret signal to shut up?

Haymitch (to Effie)

[jasonsthunderthighs]

Jason: I never know what to say to people at funerals.

Tim: Neither do I. I'm terrible.

Dick: Just say “I'm sorry for your loss,” then move on.

Jason: Oh, ok.

*At the funeral*

Jason: I'm sorry for your loss. Move on.

[incorrect-whos-lila]

William:  I'm hanging on by a thread. I think I'll just get through it as long as nothing else bad happens. William: ... There's the phone now.

[ladymiraclewings]

Tiki: Taki, what did you have for breakfast this morning?

Taki: Smartie cereal.

Tiki: Oh my God. I didn't even know Smarties made a cereal.

Taki: They don't. It's just Smarties in a bowl with milk.

[roseofithaca]

Mary: Alison, you and Mike shouldn't go to the theatre tonight.

Alison: Oh yeah, why's that?

Mary, turning to the window: An ill wind is blowing! Last night I did hear a crow calling from the trees! Caw! Caw! Well you knows what a crow sounds like.

Mary: When spying on your husband, I saw he did step on some lego. Ooh, it went right in his heel. Then when Julian did turn on the TV, the reception be not great. Not terrible, just not great.

Mary: Hear me well! No good shall come from your trip to the theatre tonight! No good at all! And if you ask me-

Mary: *turns to see Alison has gone*

Mary: Oh that's just bloody rude.

[totallycorrectrecessquotes]

T.J.: *singing* We don't need no education! Gretchen: ...Yes, you do. You just used a double negative.

[incorrect-anything-quotes]

Peter: (singing) We don't need no education…

Brian: Yes you do. You just used a double negative.

[sariahsue]

Why are you giving me the secret signal to shut up?

Chat Noir, to Ladybug

[themostincorrecthouseofblack]

Why are you giving me the secret signal to shut up?

Bellatrix (to Rodolphus)