#sort of feel a bit better though
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Whilst overall I prefer the manga to the anime, there's one aspect that I think the anime does better - the very ending.
Compared to the manga's very compactly shown thoughts of the cast, the anime gives each of them a short scene.
But although that change already is great, what matters to me the most, is this added scene of Saiko.
Despite it being so short, it feels so fitting and important to Saiko's character, making its absence in the original seem wrong. (They also added Rifuta, though comparatively, her scene isn't so significant.)
#saiki kusuo#saiko meteori#rifuta imu#saiki k#tdlosk#the disastrous life of saiki k#i'm sure people must've said this before but i always think about this when reading through 281#although i prefer the anime's version i also think the original has its merits#i feel like putting (almost) all of the words/thoughts in one panel puts more focus on kusuo's feelings#and it also nicely shows how recognizable the characters are just by how they talk#but i think showing the characters one last time before the end works better as a send-off#(plus it works better visually for the anime)#and i'm glad the anime remembered about imu and saiko#this scene works well as a 'conclusion/ending' of sorts for saiko (though naturally it'd be better if there was more)#it'd feel more incomplete without it#the anime also added small bits of dialogue here such as toritsuka thinking “ i know you can't hear me” which is also a nice touch#i really like the epilogue and i find the anime's adaptation of it the best part of the anime#the anime rarely adds things; it mostly removes stuff#there are few added scenes in earlier seasons but it's really not as noticeable as the things they cut/shortened#but because the epilogue has a whole episode to itself - the pacing is much better allowing them to add additional stuff#on top of already adapting the manga well#ended up going on a small ramble by accident
194 notes
·
View notes
Text
On Stella (Helluva Boss)
The fandom fights a lot over Stella and how she's written. Fans who like the way she is presented say it's fine that she's a one-dimensional 'evil queen' trope. It's not bad writing that she's so shallow and one note--some villains are better that way.
That isn't an inherently wrong statement. Some of the most fun villains are shallow, evil, for evil's sake types. Unfortunately, I don't think Stella works as this type of villain for a multitude of reasons.
Reason 1: Stella's 'evil' trait is at odds with the themes of the show.
Stella's primary evil trait is that she's cruel to Stolas simply because she likes being cruel to him. She's abusive and hates him. That, by itself isn't the problem. The problem is that the story isn't about Stolas being in an abusive relationship--it's primarily about two people from two different classes, and how they have to become better people and change in order to have the loving relationship they both want.
Yes, Stolas being in a past abusive relationship could be a hurtle to his growth as a character and him being in a relationship with Blitz, but the show never goes there even when it could. Stolas is not shown as being triggered by Blitz's yelling at him. In Apology Tour he has no issues fighting back and telling Blitz off, ordering him to leave. Blitz's yelling and more aggressive attitude isn't what leads to their misunderstandings, where Blitz accidentally hurts Stolas by reminding him of Stella's abuse.
Instead, Stella's abuse isn't even touched on in any major way, and does nothing to move the plot forward or cause connected drama between the two leads. Yes, she hires Striker to kill Stolas and that does at times cause problems, but she didn't need to be abusive inorder to explain why she'd want Stolas dead. In a world where assassins and murder is around every corner, it'd make just as much sense for Stella to hire Striker because Stolas cheated, and it made her a laughingstock among her high class friends.
I'd even argue her abuse makes the story make less sense. We know, from Stolas's own admission, that once his daughter was born, their marriage wasn't necessary. He claims he stayed to give Octavia a normal life, but if Stella is as volatile as she's shown, why would he think Via being around her was a good idea? If Stella had been less outwardly antagonistic and instead more cold and standoffish, with the both of them having mostly separate lives, intersected by polite, if strained family interactions when around Via, then him staying would make sense.
One of the reasons I think more people wanted Stella to be a caring mother to Octavia was because it explains why her and Stolas were still married despite her constant abuse towards him. If Stella cared about Via, and they were close, Stolas would be not only reluctant to leave but to let their false pretense of 'happy couple' slip in front of Via, since both would hurt her. It also would make Octavia's choice to stay with Stella and her anger at Stolas hold more weight, and give Via more complicated emotions. She'd really love her mom, but be confronted with the fact she hurt her father, who she also loves. As it is, it's pretty clear to see that as soon as Octavia finds out Stella is pure evil, she'll easily go back to Stolas with very little if any internal conflict.
Reason 2: Vivziepop claims she's not a one-dimensional character.
A really huge issue with Stella being presented as a one note bitch, is because the creator herself claims she's not. In an interview, Vivzie says Stella is like Beatrice Horseman from BoJack Horseman, saying that at some point we will see things from her perspective.
The problem with this is that Stella has already been portrayed too negatively and flat for this to work. Beatrice worked because, while yes she was awful to Bojkack, she also had Alzheimer's which gained her some sympathy points, as did the way Hollyhock cared for her. She also wasn't always over the top horrible to Bojack, being more passive-aggressive and neglectful.
On top of that, despite her abuse toward BoJack, particularly when he was growing up, she wasn't framed as the reason for all of BoJack's issues. He was still responsible for his own shitty actions as an adult, and when he retaliated toward her, like tossing the baby doll off the balcony, it was framed as shitty behavior. More than anything, their interactions said more about BoJack than Beatrice. Him trying to hurt her, by throwing away her baby doll or putting her in the shittiest nursing home he could find was to show how BoJack wishes he could retaliate against his mother for all the things she did to him, but it leaves him feeling hollow because he knows that due to her disease she's not aware of who he is. It's meaningless, doesn't help him get any closure.
Stella is not presented as anything other than over the top abusive in every scene she's in. Nothing in the show suggests she's anything besides violent, even going so far as having her choking dogs in a childhood picture. Nor is Stolas's treatment of her supposed to reflect on him or characterize him. The only time it might is when he ignores Via because he's too caught up fighting with on the phone, but again, it's not given much focus and he doesn't reflect on it. The same goes for the cheating--yes, Stella was abusive and he doesn't necessarily owe her anything, but Stolas refuses to acknowledge that what he did clearly upset Stella, both times he talks about it asserting that he knows he didn't hurt her. No, they weren't in love, but cheating is still degrading, and Stella is obviously upset. Frankly, I think it would have made more sense for Stolas to rub that fact in her face--he has no issue insulting her, as we see later in that conversation. Instead, his continued assurance that he didn't hurt her or do anything wrong feels like the writers talking through the character, afraid watchers will judge Stolas to harshly otherwise.
Stella getting the Beatrice treatment will likely fail because there is nothing to soften the audience toward her even a little. She has been presented as Stolas's tormentor and nothing else. There are flashes of possible sympathy for her when she interacts with her brother, but for the most part they're framed as Andre being right and Stella being stupid, rather than Stella possibly being manipulated and used by her brother.
It also will fall flat because unless her background is another showcase of how even the upper class are hurt by the system, and this leads to something either story or character wise for the main cast, then there is no point to bring it up. The point of Beatrice's story was to show how generational trauma seeps down into the next generation. BoJack doesn't even have to know about it for it to reflect on his character and explain why he is the way he is. He and his mother parallel each other, where they start out as innocent children but through their parents mistakes, they grow up into cynical, bitter adults who both feel as if they've wasted their lives.
Reason 3: To many villains.
Stella has taken a backseat in her own villain story to her brother, who, just like Stella, is simply evil (he's even characterized as a catty bitch, just like she is, except less of a yeller). It's true Andre wants power, whereas Stella wants...well nothing really, just Stolas dead I guess, but for the most part they are nearly the same. Andre is just a better written version of Stella since he actually gets to make plans and have an end goal.
Once Andre gets introduced, Stella is redundant because she offers nothing different and in fact offers less to the story overall. If Stella was going to be a flat, evil for evil’s sake villain, she and Andre should have been combined. It would have made far more sense to have Stella be a bit smarter and be the one plotting to get Stolas's power. It also would have made the court scenes more impactful because Stella would be a character that was established far earlier, and who we know is a major threat to Stolas, since she's the one that hired Striker to torture and kill him.
If Andre was going to be the main big bad for Stolas, then Stella needed to offer something different. Generally the underling under the main villain is more sympathetic, and less evil, as a way to showcase how much worse the main bad guy is. Or they're more charismatic and show up far more than the main bad guy, like Azula and Ozai. As it is, Stella is neither. She shows up just as little as her brother, and does far less.
And, while Vivzie is a woman herself, I do find the handling of Stella to have mysoginistic undertones, mainly that since her brother has shown up, she is constantly shown as stupid, and that her only good quality is her looks--things her brother constantly brings up, but are not framed as shitty on his part. Them being essentually the same charater make this look all the worse, since Andre, as I've said, didn't need to be a charater at all, and Stella could have been the main villain instead. To pretty much sideline a female charater in order to introduce a male charater that fills the same roll is not the best. Just like racisuim, sexisuim doesn't have to be done purposfly, and I don't blame anyone who finds this choice to be sexist.
Then there's Striker.
Another reason I think Stella and Andre should have been combined. Striker worked really well as the side antagonist under the main villain. He's the one we see more of, he's more charismatic and has hints of a generally interesting backstory, one that we know would fit into the theme the show has of class issues. He's a mirror of what Blitz could have turned into, while Stella could be presented as Stolas's opposite. Even their work relationship could be a dark mirror of Blitz and Stolas's real love for one another.
As it is, Striker is under two other villains, one of which has become essentially unless to the story (Stella can't do anything Andre can't at this point, especially since her and Via aren't shown to have a close relationship). This reduces his threat level and reduced his screen time since he now has to share it with another character. We can see this in the newest episode, where we get a scene where Andre is talking to Stella and then Striker appears later at the trial with no explanation. If Andre and Stella were combined, that scene could have been Stella going over the plan with Striker instead. This would have helped Striker's character, since as it is, his appearance at the trial is confusing. Maybe he's just out for himself and his selfishness won out over his hate of Royals, maybe he was blackmailed, maybe he was so furious and his pride wounded so much by Blitz he'd do anything to bring him down, maybe it's a combination of all three. We don't know because we aren't given the set up. Is it cool that Striker was a suprise? Sure, but in this case it wasn't worth not showing the charater's reason for doing something that seems to go agasint his own charaterization.
Reson 4: Threat.
One of the main reasons to have a simply evil villain is so the can be incredibly menicing. The Aundence doesn't have to feel anything but fear for the protagonists and hate for the villain. They pose no deep moral question, and it feels great when they're beaten.
Despite being a major villain we never see her threat felt by the protagonists. Take her abuse of Stolas. We see her go to hit him and he catches her hand easily and tells her off without issue. Stolas has no problem standing up to Stella ever. In The entire show Stolas is never portayed as afraid of Stella.
Contrast this with how Moxxie and Crimson interact. Yes, sometimes Moxxie does stand up to his father, but we are shown how terrified he is of Crimson multiple times during the one episonde they interact. In comparison Stella's actions never make Stolas even worried. The most we see is him doging things when she throws things at him, but he doesn't seem genuinly afraid, and it's forgoten as soon as she leaves.
He insults her over the phine, insults her to her face. When he learns she hired Striker we arent shown him suddenly relize he underestimated her and become afraid. He instead he's more conserned with his reletionship with Blitz and getting him a crystal. Stolas never tells Blitz about Stella, so we don't even know how Blitz feels about how she treated him.
It's hard for a pure eveil villain to work when only one charater even seems to know they exist and they aren't even worried about offending them. The only way this could work is if Stella pretended to be nice most of the time, but was secretly ploting, like Scar in the Lion King. Instead she's framed as this force of nature, pure bitch, who torments Stolas, yet Stolas doesn't even show anxiaty when having to meet with her, something we know he's prone too because he shuts himself in the refrigerator when contemplating his confession to Blitz ending badly.
If the writers want Stella to be evil--make her evil. Let her be powerful and scary. Have Stolas fintch at her voice, show flashbacks of her hitting him, let her win arguments and verbally tear Stolas down. Make her smart enough to plan things on her own.
I think when alot of people say Stella is a badly written charater it's not nessesarily because they wanted her to be good, or complex. I don't see alot of people angry at how Mother Gothel was written (besides her deisgn being anti-semetic) or Maleficent. It's possible to write evil, one-dimensional female villains. The issue is that even as an evil bitch, Stella falls short in a mutitupe of ways. Her charater is a complete waste, even more so now that her brother has been introduced. She has no reason to exist and serves no narritive purpose. Even as a raod block to the Stolas/Blitz ship she isn't nessesaey because their main issue is the class systum. Stella could have been dead before the show started, leaving Stolas with Via for drama, and Andre could be the evil uncle trying to get Stolas's power.
Stella is pretty much a sexy lamp, execpt the sexy lamp is also a bitch. She's less affective then the random bitch charaters introduced in romatic webtoon comics that are only there to be mean to the main charater and try to steal her man. Stella's not badly written because she's pure evil and simple, she's badly written because she doesn't serve a purpose in the story and could be replaced with a sexy, evil lamp.
#helluva boss#Stella Goetia#helluva boss stella#helluva boss critical#helluva boss striker#idk#Stella is an interesting character because she really feels like a remnate of a first draft#like i feel like her and her bro would be combined asap if helluva was made a live action show or something#and if she had to stay change her from simply wanting to be mean because lolz#and more because she loathes stolas for cheating with an imp#i mean fans say thats one of her reasons#but it's not actually touched on past a few insults#like playing up her classism would really help make her fit with themes of the show more#i also think her being abusive sort of makes Stolas's half of the show a bit lopsided#like i wish she was more like Verosika because then Stolas could learn something from his past relationship like Blitz did#as it is all of Stella's critisizuims of Stolas are presented as her being a petty abusive bitch#which makes it harder for Stolas to get good advice on how to be a better partner#because none of the toxic stuff from his only relationship was his fault#even when I think there are some things that could have been used#like his habit of just not listening to other people#he does this with Via#and he does it to Stella#aka he doesn't even notice shes ordering a hit on him at the table#its played for laughs but Stolas's lack of paying attention to people#is shown alot#even with Blitz#like when he doesn't notice how much Blitz hates his nicknames#even though he's really vocal about it#idk i think it would have been nice if Stella could have told him that#in the same way Verosika was able to tell Blitz how he fucked up during their relationship
51 notes
·
View notes
Note
It's weird to expect lb to be able to read cn mind and called her a bad partner for it. But it's even weirder for lb to ignore cn WHEN HES OBVIOUSLY IN DISTRESS and not called her a bad partner for it because I think called her a bad partner for ignoring it is understandable and justified especially since she consider herself as his boss.
Every time I bring up this conflict, I try to make it clear that I don't think Ladybug was blameless, I just think Chat Noir's writing was worse. Let's walk through the problem to show what I mean.
Season four stars with Marinette extremely stressed by her new Guardian status. In Truth and Lies, the first episodes of the season, we get this:
Ladybug: Will you cut it out with the practical jokes? I could have really hurt you! Cat Noir:(answering while hanging by the yo-yo) M'lady, the only thing that really hurts me is when you make me go on patrol by myself. (sighs, relaxing his posture) I even missed your little angry pout. Ladybug: Sorry, Kitty Cat, I'm a bit over my head at the moment. (pulling him up) Cat Noir: I bet! "Guardian of the Miraculous", big name, big responsibility!
This is also the start to Chat Noir communicating poorly. In this episode, he's straight up told that Ladybug is in over her head and he never once asks how he can help. In fact, we even get him saying this when asked how he feels about the change:
Truth: Cat Noir, tell me what- (interupted by Ladybug throwing a present at Truth) Ladybug: (covering her parasol with foil) ...do you think about my new role as guardian! Cat Noir: If it doesn't change things between us, then I'm good with it!
So not a great start to the season. I know people focused on Adrien's terrible treatment of Kagami in these episodes, but this Ladynoir dynamic was actually what rang alarm bells for me. I kept waiting for Chat Noir to offer his support since it was really, really obvious that Ladybug was in over her head since she was late to patrols, the last season literally ended with her losing her mentor figure, and, you know, she straight up told him that was what was going on?
The next episode is Gang of Secrets in which we see Marinette out her identity to Alya. I get why she did this, she needed support and her partner doesn't seem interested in giving it, but she can't say that for certain because she never asked him directly and she should have. Trusting Chat Noir over Alya would have allowed Ladynette to maintain the security of her secret identity - a thing she claimed was more important than ever - and to honor their partnership. At the very least, she should have told Chat Noir that Rena Rouge was now a full time holder so that he could account for that in battle and to minimize the fallout by owning up to her mistake asap. The longer a lie goes on, the worse the truth will hurt.
To Ladybug's credit, she does eventually acknowledge her mistake after the Scarabella incident:
Ladybug: You... must've been pretty surprised to discover there was another holder! (Silence. She sits beside Cat Noir.) Ladybug: I'm really sorry, Cat Noir. I should've told you. I mean, if I found out that you told someone about your secret identity, I'd... probably be upset, too. I'm really sorry I hurt your feelings.
This is a decent apology. She doesn't try to absolve herself of wrong doing. Instead, she acknowledges that what she did would hurt her, too, if the shoe were on the other foot. The only thing she loses points on is the fact that she doesn't tell him about Rena Furtive.
However, instead of agreeing with her and telling her that she has hurt him, Chat Noir says that she did nothing wrong and never once brings up how their weakened partnership is bothering him:
Cat Noir: You didn't hurt my feelings. You did everything right. Paris will always need a Ladybug superhero to watch over her. It's just... I realized that if one day that hero wasn't you, m'lady, since we don't know each other's identities, that means... I'd never see you again. Ever. And now, I just don't know if I can bear it.
This is the thing that I hate about this arc. The reason why I say Ladybug is blamed for not reading his mind. Especially because, three episodes later, we get Rocketear, which gives us this:
Cat Noir: Everyone has doubts now and then, (looks down) even me... Ladybug: Is everything okay, Cat Noir? Cat Noir: Yeah, yeah. (prepare his fist) Pound it! Ladybug: (fistbumps) Pound it!
Rocketear is the episode where Nino outs that he and Alya know each other's identities while acting like Ladybug said identities weren't a big deal even though that is very much not what happened. You'd think that Chat Noir would want to know the full story, but instead he just lies and says that everything is fine.
So we have two situations where the show allowed Ladybug to give Chat Noir a chance for clear and open communication and both times he turns her down.
What's worse is that he clearly starts making up stories in his head, leading to Kuro Neko, which starts with Adrien avoiding a fight on purpose as some sort of shit test. He then gets upset when Ladybug... doesn't lament his absence on national TV?
Clara: (from TV) By the way, where's Cat Noir? You've saved Paris without him quite a few times recently. Are you two at odds with each other? Carapace, Pegasus, Vesperia and Pigella: (from TV) Pound it! Ladybug: (from TV) Of course not, it's just that... umm, he's a partner like any other! The most important is to pick the best superheroes for each mission, with or without Cat Noir. No matter what, we've got a great team and we'll always be here to save Paris. (Adrien is shocked.) Adrien: (turns off the TV and sighs) "A partner like any other..."
Dude, what did you want her to do here? Complain that you flaked on her? Make Paris feel less safe by saying she doesn't know where you are? Imply that the fight was barely won without you? What are you doing? Plagg, you are completely failing as a mentor right now.
The shit test continues as Chat Noir goes to meet up with Ladybug now that the battle is over, arriving just as Ladybug has finished instructing the team on what to do:
Ladybug: Come on, guys! Hurry up before you all detransform. I'll meet you at rendezvous points. (The heroes jump away in different directions, and Ladybug starts typing something on her Yo-yo.) Cat Noir: Hey! Meow are you, m'lady? Ladybug: Great, thanks, but I gotta go retrieve all these Miraculous. Cat Noir: I could lend you a paw to help save time. Ladybug: Thanks, kitty cat, but it's a guardian's job to do it. Cat Noir: I know who some of them are, remember? I was there when you first gave them their Miraculous! Ladybug: You don't even know where their rendezvous points are, I don't have time to— Cat Noir: Playing cat and mouse is my forte, you know— Ladybug: (yelling) If you wanna save me time, stop wasting it in the first place! (Cat Noir gasps. As Ladybug swings away, Cat Noir clenches his fist.) Cat Noir: And take my Miraculous back when you're done!
So Ladybug doesn't publicly chastise Chat Noir for missing the battle and rejects an offer to help because of very legitimate timing concerns, leading to Chat Noir quitting because she failed his stupid, petty, childish tests. Realistic writing? Yes. Writing that paints Ladybug as the one in the wrong? No.
Going into this episode, Ladybug has no idea that things are messed up between them even though she has actually kept communication lines open. She asks him if things are okay, but he lies. And when he's ready to quit? He plays stupid games and wins a stupid prize. It's really not shocking that the next scene sees Ladybug totally baffled by what just happened:
Plagg: For a while now, you've been neglecting this camembert— I mean Cat Noir, and going on adventures with the all other cheeses! Ladybug: But he should be happy about it, it gives him more time off. Plagg: Cat Noir doesn't wanna have time off, Ladybug! He is in love with you! And your persistent calling on all the other heroes has broken his heart.
And how is she supposed to know that, Plagg? Was she supposed to assume that her partner was lying when he said he was fine? Because she did ask and he said that nothing was wrong. But something was wrong and it lead him to build up a story in his head, reading nonexistent intent into her actions, all of which is toxic and unhealthy communication.
I cannot stress how common this shit is. I've seen it so many times and I will own that I've done it in the past and wound up getting no support when I needed it because I'd directly told people I didn't and they committed the heinous crime of... believing me.
Here's the other thing, there are times when I'm in distress and legitimately don't want or need help. Times when I just need to be alone for a bit. So if someone asks me if I'm okay during those times, I'm probably just going to say, "Yeah, I just need a people break" or something like that. That's why the Scarabella scene is so bad. Ladybug can see that Chat Noir is in distress and he gives her a fully plausible answer: I'm not upset with you, I'm just saddened by the idea of losing you. And she believes him because why wouldn't she?
Same goes for Rocketear. It's reasonable for Ladybug to assume that Chat Noir is just shaken by the fight. She has no idea about the bombshell that Nino dropped right before the fight. She doesn't even know that Nino and Chat Noir are actually close friends, making this fight a lot more devastating than it looks at face value. Her actions here are not objectively wrong. They're only wrong if you know the whole story, including Adrien's needs. Things that she cannot know unless Chat Noir uses his words to tell her things.
I cannot over stress how much season four is a textbook example of denying yourself support because you cannot communicate your own needs. Is it an understandable character flaw for a character with Adrien's background to have? Yes. Absolutely. 100%. But it's still a character flaw. This season desperately needed an arc about Adrien learning to tell people what's wrong. Not because he's the only one in the wrong here, but because things cannot get better when Ladybug has no idea that she's hurting him. (Nino has no idea either, but let's keep our focus on Ladybug.)
One of the most important things you can do for your own mental well being is to dismiss the idea that your needs are the same as everyone else's. Everyone needs different amounts of attention and values different behavior based on things like their upbringing and life events.
I get the feeling that I'm wired pretty similar to Marinette. At least, it influences how I write her because I can go months without talking to my best friends and still call them my best friends, a trait we all share because two of use are artsy introverts and two of us are moms to young kids, which allows for very little free time. Meanwhile, my SO and his best friend spend hours on the phone almost every week. I swear that those two go into withdrawal if they don't talk at least once every seven days. If months went by without them talking? Something would be very wrong, but the exact same time gap isn't even remotely concerning when it comes to my friends. It's something my SO and I had to figure out when we got together because I need a lot less attention than he does. But we communicated and found a balance that we continue to work to communicate about so that he doesn't feel neglected and I don't feel overwhelmed by too little me time.
What I'm trying to say is Marinette wasn't horribly wrong for assuming that Chat Noir was telling her the truth or that he liked having a larger team so he had less responsibility. Those are reasonable assumptions. Especially since he never actually indicated that he wanted more responsibility until he was ready to quit and decided to shit test her by pushing for more to do when she was stressed and on a timer.
I do think that she should have offered it to him before that or - at the very least - the show should have clearly stated why she didn't do that since it apparently had nothing to do with Chat Blanc trauma like we all thought it did. I'm not saying that she's blameless or perfect or that there weren't things she could have done better. It's just really hard for me to look at Chat Noir's behavior in season four and go, "Oh yeah, he's the injured party here. Ladybug holds all the blame and did everything wrong." She did many things wrong, but generally speaking, she owned her faults and tried to keep communication channels open. Chat Noir chose to ignore those chances to talk or otherwise try to express his needs in a clear and understandable manner.
We'll end with one final point to drive this home: You said that she's his boss. Well, if my boss asked me, "is everything okay with the project?" and I said, "yes" while freaking out about the upcoming deadline that I'm probably going to miss because he's given me too much work, the issue is not all on my boss. It's on both of us. Him for overloading me and me for not telling him I'm overloaded. You could even argue that it's mostly on me because I'm the only one who can properly gauge my own ability to do a given workload. As soon as it was too much, I should have said something. And if I don't feel like my boss is approachable? Then I should quit. But that isn't the situation I'm in and it doesn't appear to be the one that Chat Noir was in, either. He wanted to stay part of the team, he just totally failed to tell Ladybug how being on the team was making him feel.
People magically knowing what you need and how you feel is a myth. I promise you, most people in this world do not want to cause you pain, but if you cannot clearly express when someone is causing you pain, then you will continue to get hurt by people who would be very happy to not hurt you if they actually knew that their actions were causing you pain.
#ml writing critical#ml writing salt#adrien deserves better#marinette deserves better#I do give Luka a bit of a side eye for not getting involved after Wishmaker though#Dude's supposed to be some sort of empath and he's at his best when he's in a mentor role#He should have been allowed to be Adrien's Alya since Nino is clearly not suited for the role#Season four my belothed#kuro Neko salt#ml season 4 salt#you cannot expect someone to correct their behavior when no one is telling them that they're behaving badly#And no one calls Marinette out so of course she doesn't change her behavior!#She is shown to be willing to change when prompted too#She only knew that something was wrong post Scarabella because Alya told her#Do you really think Marinette was aware that she was hurting Chat Noir and just willfully kept doing it?#Or is it more likely that she just didn't know because no one told her?#Feel free to give Tikki some blame too because she's been a real shitty mentor for a while now#which breaks my heart because I love Tikki and Plagg and want them to be good mentors
101 notes
·
View notes
Text
commitment to drawing asmo img gave him chronic tendonitis when he was only 20……</3
#things i do for evil girls.and demons or all sorts#so strange i feel like i dont even draw thatmuch. like i spendhalf my time game ing …#blegh this is mostly why ive been insctivw#everything since april has been such lefthanded nonsense… im doing pt tjough so i hope inctje next uear or so it improves#i want to relearn to draw properly w my left though💭so i can reduce the strain on my right even if/when i can draw a little again:3#its alrdy a bit better though when it first happened i cldnt even hold a pen.or open doors. now i can like do those rhings.
78 notes
·
View notes
Text
i have officially returned. ask me anything.
#random thoughts#i'll probably answer it tomorrow because i'm tired. i don't know why.#ciel if you see this i've been nicer to myself these past few days following your birthday. taking care of myself in general aspects.#which i sort of hate myself for but it's okay because. uh. i won't be like this forever. i'll be better at what i'm trying to do i promise.#new year's resolution is not fucking with me.........#oh also!! i've been sort of feeling like a dead person at times. and also like a cockroach. i have had to repeatedly tell myself that#i'm not dead i'm not dead!!!!#because i'm not. obviously. and i know i'm not. my brain is just silly. it likes to tell me i am things i am not like book characters.#and recently my mother got me my own rosary and we've been practicing praying together with my brother.#can you imagine how bad it must be for me to turn to christianity as a coping mechanism? not even when i was terrorized with death thoughts#not even in august for fuck's sake.#but it's actually not that bad. though i think i like the idea of organized religion more than i like being a part of it.#also i feel like my being catholic (mostly non-practicing) is betraying the queer community somehow. like. queer people have suffered#so much because of the christian church in general. so it's like. being christian is weird when i'm also queer.#but also then i feel weird when i try to do things in relation to christianity. like. put saint in my artist name.#that feels blasphemous i don't know. is it?????? it's not that serious either way but. augh.#i am going to write a song about this. also fellow christians is it okay to use the lyric 'uselessly clutching her rosary' or is that bad?#because i mean. technically. the she i'm referring to sort of is. because god isn't solving any of our problems.#he's just fucking. watching. if he's even real.#(and no my disappearance isn't related to the catholicism thing it's something else. as in the one thing i haven't told anyone else but cie#and an irl friend. if you are ciel then i am completely open to talking about said thing.#otherwise i will continue to drop cryptic little notes on my blog because I AM SILLY. {: )#going to play roblox now and maybe say hello to you fuckers on discord for a bit of fun. goodbye.
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
Here's a kind of experimental lineless A.B.A from memory to keep up the good habits of this blog. Then I got carried away and did some creative writing that you can read under the cut if you'd like. It can be interpreted as the picture's context, or as an unrelated scenario.
Warning for a homunculus with shitty bad mental health:
"A.B.A stood there, in the middle of the cold night, seen by... who cares? as she stared at the broken window of that room, which had once been her prison, her flask, so to speak.
Even though it had now been years since her great escape, the location could nowadays elicit the same strong feelings as it did on day one, though that wasn't shown in her outward expression: seemingly fully blank, aside from a flicker in her eyes.
That room was still invisibly asphyxiating, still like if its walls murmured to her again that, were anything to happen to her... No one would care. And that statement had something that broke her, and it wasn't just due to its cruel face-value.
Think about it; being the way she was created, her biggest virtue was being able to excel human limitations: she could come out unscathed from almost any wound if blood was abundant, and was effectively able to give senescence the middle finger.
But here she was, hurting from the sight of an empty room, that, logically speaking, posed no more chagrin or danger. So, she mentally wasn't able to completely excel humans, as from what she knew, even they must have surely thought of this behaviour as weak and deranged. If we were so kind, a mistake-a shortcoming of the mind.
If these sorts of shortcomings kept piling up... Then what was even that she excelled at?
#a.b.a#guilty gear#ask to tag#art tag2b named#eye strain#dunno if putting this in a writing tag#anyhow this is sort of a spiritual sucessor to that pic I drew like 2 years ago. most of it was done in my phone too! though I later edited#this one A LOT on the computer.#OKAY from now on I'll write some tags super unrelated to gg cause I'm bored. feel free to skip#does anybody here play d.b legends? I've been playing an absurd ammt lately. the current festival's being... divisive for the community lol#what do you think abt gog.eta's plat. it makes him ridiculously strong and fun to play as but the devs could've done some stuff better#like giving a bit more than 777 z powers come on. anyhow! I wonder if the girls boosts plus this is a clue of ke.fla being our next ultra#which would be controversial for an anniversary ult but I like her. gonna get some food and go upgrade my ta.magami
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
Some people have been saying that live action Sanji feels a little bit more soft and endearing than manga Sanji, but they can't pinpoint why because he does still feel like Sanji. Some people think it's just Taz's acting, and he does do a great job, but I don't think that's the main reason. Others think his flirting has been turned down a bit, but honestly it hasn't really? He still openly flirts with Nami when they first meet, and he still says things like "women are a mystery to be unraveled" and other goofy simp stuff. And his kindness like being willing to feed the hungry no matter what is obviously something that was always there (it's why Luffy chose him in the first place. Hell, in the manga he chooses Sanji as his cook before he ever actually tastes Sanji's cooking, simply because he sees Sanji feed Gin and realizes what kind of person Sanji is).
But there is a difference! And I've figured out what it is, because there IS one manga/anime Sanji trait that wasn't present in live action Sanji: his hatred of men.
Live action Sanji isn't a misandrist anymore 😳
#One piece#OPLA#OPLA spoilers#Obviously it was played for jokes he wasn't like actively cruel towards men and was kind to them too#Like feeding them if they were starving#And he obviously cared about his friends#He was misandrist is a silly cartoonish way#But it did highlight the way he treated women differently from men and made his flirting and simping come across as way more over the top#In comparison to how he behaved towards women#And I think it was a smart choice because English speaking audiences are especially sensitive to that sort of thing these days#I think the only other thing that gives him a slightly different vibe#is live action can't give him heart eyes or have him do the wiggling stuff lol#So his simping feels toned down even though technically he simps a similar amount as in canon#I do think it's funny how some fans like him better in live action because of this on tumblr dot com aka the OG man hating website#Like fans who are caught up understand WHY he's hostile towards men compared to women in canon (see: WCI)#but I don't mind them leaving it out in the live action#And it isn't like an integral key to who he is as a person/character#People who were already Sanji fans knew he was their problematic little meow meow#But it's nice that live action can showcase his kind and soft side a bit more#Like that stuff is already there in canon but he's a little more tsundere about it y'know? Lol
82 notes
·
View notes
Text
wink blink look !!
#art#my art#artists on tumblr#digital art#sona#ouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhgghhhh#am i RIGHT guys hfhvs#:33#//not many thoughts recently#not many thoughts for a while actually lol#must've talked myself weary! huh!#/let me try at this though - i feel like i have some little part of my brain that's all stopped up#it's been like that for a minute !#/ah but a question - do you ever stand by a bit of forest and hear what are distinctly Whispers ?#i know it's definitely the wind but it's fun to think it's anything else lol :>>#ghosts or fairies or the road down the hill for whatever reason#/oh and speaking of hearing i got a weird + shrill + loud tone in my ear the other day and it just didn't happen again#a sudden EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE and then it stopped lmao#funky stuff man. wonder what's up with that hfhs#//anyway i'm working on my artfight references rn lol :)#i've finished one! what a miracle!! hfsh-#it looks a lot better than the one last year like Wow. don't think the same person made these you know what i mean hfh#//ah i've also started using padlet for realsies this time :>#it's a neat spot - it's gonna be great to just have the palettes i need on another device loll#that's the biggest problem i have on this planet! having to scroll my blog for palettes is not the most fun thing hfsh#/anyway gonna get back to it!!#i'm sort of tired but i Really wanna make kira and hid's this yearrr#they are very ~+~+~ <3 ~+~+~ to me lol :>>#so toodles ! here i go again hfhsv
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
ZACH TAYLOR & DARYL HARPER | HOLY GHOST BY MODERN BASEBALL
#my zach & mobo agenda strikes again#super dark times#zach taylor#daryl harper#charlie and josh are there briefly but. this is largely abt The Dream#sam edits#tw blood#tw stabbing#or well. pulling the blade out after a stabbing#also to ramble a sec bc i think using the ‘third wish has always been three more’ bit with the flashbacks may be confusing#using ‘a third wish to wish for three more’ feels like a plea for more chances to change things—smthn about#regretting the choices you made and wanting the opportunity to make better choices or#fix the previous ones. like… it feels like a line about hindsight/regret/wasted opportunity & chances#which to then apply that to Zach here—that is certainly the sort of stuff plauging his#subconscious in relation to how he handled the Daryl situation. even though awake!Zach is#obviously struggling to deal with The Guilt/the role he played in things (see: my post about#’blood on hands’ from the other night) his dream here literally SHOWS that this situation#with Daryl is crushing him (see: Daryl sitting on top of him) and a part of him KNOWS that#he is partially at fault (see: the copious blood all over him but the FOCUS on it on his hands)#+ the idea im getting at is: he not only wishes things could’ve gone differently but that HE could’ve DONE things differently
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
2024 reads / storygraph
Stuck In Her Head
short contemporary YA coming-of-age set in Hong Kong, following two teen girls who are friends
one is a musical prodigy but has lost her passion and wants to explore different possibilities for her future
the other is passionate about music but dealing with mental health & family issues
the latter develops a crush on the former, who is aroace, and they have to re-navigate their friendship, while working on a music/coding competition project together and dealing with their own issues
#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#stuck in her head#Hm this had a lot of aspects I found interesting but didn’t quite live up to what I wanted it to be#I definitely love reading YA set not in the west - this is set in Hong Kong - and I liked that a lot!#And of course we always need more YA about friendships rather than being romance focused (though this has an unrequited aspect of that)#This is written by 17yos which is cool! though it does show in the prose a bit. There’s a lot of ‘the girl’ ‘the teen’ instead of their nam#Or like informing the reader of info in slightly awkward ways - one visits the other’s house and says “is this the first time I’ve been to#- I feel like there are better ways to tell the reader this. Like that’s not something you wouldn’t be sure about right?#This made it feel like their friendship was quite tentative - school friends who’ve known each other for years but only really#started hanging out properly recently - but the text says they’ve been inseparable for years.#It definitely tackles a lot of things from burnout and perfectionism; losing passion for your talents; parents divorcing; depression#I just think some could have been handled with a bit more depth/nuance; with more space and introspection given to them#especially their main conflict about one having a crush on the aroace and then she pretends to reciprocate bc the other is suicidal and the#the other finds out and gets mad and it's......weirdly drawn out but also barely explored in depth also? idk#definitely anticipated it to be a bit like this because it's written by such young authors it's expected that they're still perfecting thei#I think teens who prefer shorter books & are looking for this sort of thing would still enjoy it for sure. I'll def look out for future boo#bisexual books#aroace books
17 notes
·
View notes
Text
lol they weren't able to get a urine sample on friday so they sent Kiki home with these anti-absorption beads to put in an empty litter box
She walks past the litter box and gazes at it longingly but she will not use it. And she did pee today so I know it's not because she can't go, she just doesn't want to .... she was soooo mad when she realized that her normal litter wasn't there.
So I guess I'll give her a couple more hours and if she won't use it we'll just need to go to the vet again tomorrow. I can't withhold her litter for too long if she's going to refuse to go 😭
#actualmichelle problems#she had a bit of blood in her pee once yesterday so she might have a uti#overall she seems like she's doing okay but she's definitely not her normal self so she must feel bad#hopefully we can get this sorted out tomorrow and have her feeling better soon :(#i honestly kind of wish I'd just taken her to an emergency vet friday evening since the normal vet is closed on the weekends#they've been in contact like they gave us her blood results (everything was “great”) and asked about her#but the fact that this wasn't resolved on friday is a bit upsetting to me#though tbf at that point there had been no blood and she'd just started having problems
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
( T_T)\(^-^ )
#vent(?) ->#ive been wearing bracelets more lately and its making me feel a bit happier#looking down on my arms and seeing cute stuff instead of sh is sort of comforting#and whenever the bracelets have words that i love on them it just makes me feel so happy. i get reminded of the things i love#im putting this in tags instead of in the actual post because i still feel sort of bad talking about this kind of thing#even though i know its okay to..#i think i recommend this if looking at your arms scare you for any reason#im very scared if my arms and hands but if theres cute stuff on it i feel a bit better i think#thats why i draw on my hands and arms too. i put smiley faces on them and i put lain on them so i can always see things that i like#i am not even that good at making bracelets but its been making me feel so happy lately#not even just for myself but for my friends too.. it seems to make them happy :3#i love happiness!!! i love smiling i want to get better. i want to get better SO much even if i dont always feel like i do#i have time to get better even if it feels like everything could end at any second. im going to try and take my time#and try to become a happy person#so i can make other people happy too. i dont know what the point of this post is#i just want somebody out there to know im trying. im sorry
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
Recent ones of these even though they all look the same lol.. forcing myself to document progress..
#I can average like 2500 words a day for a while and then something gets in the way and I don't write for a week or something#which then sort of erases my previous Doing Good At Keeping Up With It lol.. but... alas#Still moving slowly forward...#There's a 'community board' place in game where you can go to look at a few things and some of whats there is little 'odd jobs' the player#can do for a little extra coin (since you can buy items in the game/might need coin).#Thhough of course since it's just interactive fiction/visual novel it's not like... actual minigames or something. Just like..#mini stories of your character going places and doing stuff and having some interactions with the other places in the world#Like for example since modern refrigerators don't exist in this world one of the odd jobs you can do is help with doing ice deliveries#or there's one odd job where you assist a guy recharging the city's main bell tower/time keeping place by helping him go around and replace#the iriminel crystals (kind of like magical batteries - stones that are able to store energy that way and be used to fuel passive#enchantments). or one where you help food prep for the cooks at a nearby automat. etc. etc.#Just little short things to get a better glimpse of how the wider city is outside of just interacting with the main characters. plus earn#a tiny bit of coin. Though because they're so short there's not really branching paths or anything much for choices beyond#usually an optional dialogye menu where you can talk to the person you're working with and ask them personal#or work related questions if inclined to do so. It'd be cool if they were more in depth but.......erugh...#I have so much writing left to do already lol.. Also since it's really just to get money I could have just had them#all be like a single sentence of 'you go here and you do this all day then you come home. + 15 coins. yaay' and thats all#So maybe it's a middle ground to elaborate upon them at all. Just enough extra details to maybe be a little interesting#like ''ooh my character is in a little cart riding through the misty morning forest on their way to deliver ice'' . but also not so much#that it takes away time from like... the literal actual main game lol#ANYWAY. That's what all these are. There are like 10 optional little world exploring/job things you can do. and each I guess seem to be#about 2.500 words ish. That's including the optional chatting menus though. but still. reasonable for a little side thing I guess.#I got finished with one character's quests and stuff so I decided to take a break to work on some of the other little things like the Odd#Jobs and the 8 characters you can find around the world to have short conversations with that aren't actual main characters either. etc.#Then I shall return back to the Main Actual Things. ... augh...... still so much to do...#Which I could also just cut everything extra out but... idk.. since it's mostly all text I feel the need to give more options to flesh out#the actual setting somehow. Since in a 3D game you can walk around and explore the world and stuff. And of course there#are pictures. but it would take me infinitely longer to do detailed art of so much of the entire city youre in or etc. So i guess my versio#of still having some amount of ''exploration'' is just.. set up optional paths where more of the world can at least be Described.#You can't actually walk through a 3d orchard. or an elaborate bell tower. or an elven shrine. But you can Read About being in them LOL
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
do you think he misses me........ ? maybe ..... maybe he's upset with me... i don't know. all i know is that he still means so much to me...
i don't know... i'm so bad at gushing about characters that mean a lot to me on here.... i just say things and go into immediate keysmashing... i also don't really follow ho/me/stu/ck anymore... like i haven't followed canon in such a long time so at this point dave's simply full with my own headcanons and interpretations of his character..... however still going by canon because i'm never normal about ANYTHING
i think he's so wonderful.... i think he deserves a lot of nice things... i'm so unsure how talk about him because i am tired.... but he is lovely. i love him. i wish i can do him justice... or write cute silly drabbles about us... but i am terrified of doing anything ever lately... i'm also too distracted and my brain feels like it's going into overdrive.... just so much happening up in there....
i'm sure dave would somehow in his own way sneakily manage to curate a mixtape for me of sounds to ease my mind because it's always constantly buzzing... he'll like just casually offer it to me and act like it's absolutely nothing but is freaking out over it. or something. actually.
i never liked it how people were like "dave freaks out all the time" "dave would do something nice and freak out" or whatever... like yeah he freaks out and in general is too hyper-aware of his surroundings, but i also don't think he'd consistently freak out on offering something because he wants the person to feel better even if he may or may not have a crush on them.... i have too many thoughts about him maybe i can make a post fully about him if i'm brave enough.
he's aloof but also a complete dork, but to me he's always the "casual down-to-earth" type of guy, mostly from his entire speech of him not wanting to be the knight of time and rather be just some guy. so maybe that's why.
talking too much about him. this is my longest post i think... of like any f/o without me feeling like i'm being too much or too annoying.
i just miss him too much. been kind of thinking about him lately. it's okay. i love him to bits. this also feels strange. but it's okay. i need to get out of my comfort zone. i hope dave knows i will love him forever. or something. i don't know. um. i just hope he knows he is my entire world. yeah. my silly crow boy i love you <3
#why do i sound so awkward.#i say as i am exhausted and want to sleep#this is a long post#sorry in advance#maybe i can sort of remake my self insert in the hs universe...#before it was me trying to keep everything similar to it#i haven't been into hs lately because of a Show that has been Plaguing my Thoughts#it still is plaguing my thoughts but maybe i can get back into hs again because i do miss it and it goes hand-in-hand with the show#well if you count the time nonsense both provide then it does#<- sorry i love time things and time travel and things like that#helps my brain work better#anyway um#i would've said more things about dave in the tags actually but then i decided not to because i already talked too much about him#okay.#he's just so special to me. i love him to bits.#if i don't talk to him for too long it feels like something is missing#wah. think not being able to ramble or just talk about my interests really did a number on me because i don't talk about myself.#Ever#yay so fun#love toxic friends <3#note my sarcasm#i'm proud of Me though#i did that i typed this. i'm so proud of me.#ashley talks#💿️#<- this post is about him of course i'm adding his tag
2 notes
·
View notes
Note
🎤 🎤 🎤
a song that i associate with my muse meme!
AHH, hey, ramone!! thank you for sending in this prompt :D since you sent in three of the mic's, i shall now be treating you to three songs that make me think of blamore when i hear them / that i associate with it. an explanation of why i chose them will be in the tags <3
hozier - who we are.
youtube
icehouse - crazy.
youtube
depeche mode - personal jesus.
youtube
#IT WAS PROBABLY NOTHING BUT IT FELT LIKE THE WORLD: musings.#asks - answered.#ooc post.#okay but ESPECIALLY heavy on the last one because it literally all about the idea of someone that people can turn to in hard times-#like a god or a prophet who will listen to your plights and help you + who you should believe in. and i say this because one major theme-#to blamore's character is the concept of being a false prophet and someone who essentially unfortunately takes advantage of people's-#longing for things to get better in gotham. bc i feel like a lot of people there have either been failed by the system by other's or-#possibly both and this is so that blamore can get people to voluntarily want to consume the 'seeds' it distributes in order to uhh...#well purge gotham of its undesirables basically as terrible as that sounds. but yeah that depeche mode song? it's such a good one for-#him and definitely has helped me before to write things related to him since blamore does sometimes believe in its own hubris.#but as for the second one by icehouse that one i associate with it because although it doesn't exactly consider itself to fully identify-#with the label of being a 'man' i feel as if blamore will still talk about itself that way sometimes. its relationship with its gender-#is honestly a little bit complicated NGL because him using it/its pronouns as well is something blamore adopted recently even-#though he'd always sort of felt like disconnected and/or like it didn't really align with how he saw himself completely. BUT yeahhh#i honestly could start a whole discussion about that but i shall do that another time perhaps ahah. anyhow though besides that-#elephant in the room ever since it has transformed into this half-human half-plant monster being... although it does love any partners-#it has very much (trust me) i feel like it does wonder why they chose to be with him more often than he'd like to admit.#so that's where the whole 'crazy' part comes in and as for the hozier song that song is about how you kind of have to carve through-#this 'darkness' to rediscover ourselves and who we want to be as a result of going through a rough time or just something tough in-#general and that is SO freaking fitting in my opinion for blamore because it definitely had to completely reframe the way it thought-#about itself when it transformed. and he also had to figure out what he believed in / what his values were now which can be suchhh-#a messy process TBH but this isn't the first time that blamore's had to rediscover itself as life is honestly kind of this ongoing-#process of losing yourself and trying to find yourself again you know? but yeah. i hope you enjoyed my explanation here tehe <3#and also that you enjoy the tunes!!
3 notes
·
View notes
Note
If you ever met one of Book's ex-teammate (from BFB) do you think you'd get along with them?
... ^_^
#emoticons 8/10 this m!a sucks LOL#priceless taggy#taggy already has a little bit as book has been able to make better bonds!#i like to think taco and saw book's already on better terms with#along with maybe icecube? the part at the end of tpot 10 seems to imply theyre gonna try some sort of arc to get them back on better terms#atleast#i feel like of all of her old team members though#gaty is definitely the hold out. do you SEE how she treats book in tpot 1... i mean tbf cant blame her but still girl is sooo evilspirited#/lh
3 notes
·
View notes