#sorry to make such a heavy post on my fucking birthday of all days lmao

[nekhcore]

for those of you who write or do OC lore and stuff, do you ever have a moment of clarity where you realize where a specific motif you use comes from? like, psychologically?

Razimyr's story is that his absent dad got into some fucked up evil magic right before he was conceived, and he ended up born with it. when it surfaces, his mom effectively exiles him. decades later, he comes back to his hometown by chance and finds out that he has two siblings who have no idea he even exists, and his mother says he's not her son.

Calem's story is that his parents couldn't handle that he's trans, and after he got Magic Forever HRT from the fey he left town for good. and i was thinking to myself today, wouldn't it be so fucked up if he had to go home for whatever reason and found out that his parents had had another child? a son that they actually wanted and got along with just fine? haha.

and i sat there like... why do i keep doing this one. and i remembered my whole life i'd felt so wrong and so fucked up, that my family would have been much better off without me around. and then my dad got remarried, and they had another kid, and sometimes i would look at them interacting when they didn't know i was up yet and think they looked so normal and see, i was right. and after i ran away from home--sure it was a whole thing and everyone was upset about it--i came back years later as an adult and they were finally a "normal" family now that i was gone.

i can't help but feel like i've been carrying that feeling with me my whole life.

[tteokdoroki]

aali………please please tell us exactly what Rin said about Isagi not being able to fuck that had Egoist Yoichi baby boy fuck reader right in front of Rin 😭 i KNEED to know I must know babes or I’ll go insane

*ੈ🌩️‧₊˚—  lost in the lights, out of my mind + yoichi isagi, rin itoshi.

૮˶ᵕ ༝ᵕ˶ა synopsis — rin itoshi has a bad habit of dishing out what he can't take and a locker room fight with his rival, yoichi isagi, leaves him in the most vulnerable place he'll ever be in. all because of his little unrequited crush on you.

⭑ warnings — please read + mdni ! heavy!smut, porn with some kind of plot, characters aged up to 20s, established relationships (with isagi), unrequited love (rin lmao), some crushing, manipulaton, reverse cuckholding (?), voyuerism, unprotected s!ex, clothed s!ex, fingering (f!receiving), finger sucking, nipple play, body worship, dry humping, multiple orgasms, male masturbation, overstimulation, edging, orgasm control, aftercare, light!degradation, light!dacryphilia, light!sub/dom dynamics, sort of a threesome, creampies, psychologically tormenting rin lmao!!! pro player!yoichi isagi, pro player!rin itoshi, fem!reader - not beta read !

⭑ words — 8.5K.

⭑ notes — happy birthday tew me!! this is my gift to you all, i feel like its such a tradition for me to post something on my bday like i have for the last three years so here you are!! anon, i am so sorry this took so long, i hope you like this... i lost my mind writing it but it was sososo much fun!! enjoy my loves <3 m.list / fic that this refers to (you dont need to read it to understand!) ✩

if there’s one thing rin hates more than anything, it’s losing. after a sour defeat, three goals to a frustrating two, emotions are running high and the locker room fills with an atmosphere so tense even a butcher's knife couldn’t cut through it. it suffocates the boys as they flood into the room, defeatedtly shoving their cleats and water bottles into their cubbyholes — their breathing ragged and muscles aching. 

the silence is shattered by a vicious snarl from blue lock’s main star, yoichi isagi, as he walks in last and heads straight for his rival. “way to fucking go, rin! your stupid little act just cost us the entire game.” the striker bares his fangs, frothing like a rabid dog. “you happy now?” 

“oh fuck you, isagi. were all your shots supposed to be that half-assed? or was that just a weak attempt to impress your little girlfriend up in the stands.” rin fires back, equally as riled up, throwing his sweat soaked shirt into his designated cubby for this game. 

the rest of the team knows not to intervene when two of their best players go head to head, slowly retreating to the showers and changing out of their kit. rin is too highly strung, everything is his way or the highway and everyone is beneath him. isagi is hot headed, switches up on you faster than you can say your own name — and only gets worse if you mention his girlfriend during a fight. 

for a moment, the dark haired striker’s face falls and his deep blue eyes cloud with something rin itoshi only ever sees on the pitch. but isagi quickly recovers, offering the other player a tight lipped smile. 

“let’s keep her out of this, yeah?”

that only makes rin want to double down. 

his relationship with isagi is complex — he’s better than the guy in every way he knows is possible, and yet he envies him. no matter what rin does, his fellow player will always have some kind of leverage over him. whether it be sae’s approval, ego’s favouritism, you. the history between the three of you is even more confusing and flustering, and to this day, rin still doesn’t know who he wants or hates more. jealousy reaches its boiling point at  the forefront of his mind, it’s perplexing and he hates the way it makes him feel — like he’s out of the loop, out of control and it only makes rin want to lash out at isagi more.

so he does. 

he pokes and prods at isagi, twists at the parts of him that really set him off because he has no other way to cope and no other outlet for his build up of emotions. 

“she must be embarrassed,” rin drawls as if he’s enjoying taunting his teammate, though his face shows no signs of it. “to have a boyfriend who can’t even play soccer without looking luke-warm or mediocre. this is your job. your life. and yet, you’re still not getting it. you’re nowhere near being on the same level as me.” 

isagi grits his teeth. “i’m warning you, rin. quit while you’re ahead.” 

but he can’t, he won’t. not until he makes isagi hurt the same way he does. for losing this match, for losing control.

“if soccer is your life and you’re this bad at it, then i wonder what else you suck at,” the younger itoshi brother adds coldly with the petulance of a child still learning how to navigate how he feels. standing up to his full height, rin smirks as if he’s finally put his enemy into place. he lets his emotions spill into every word he says until they weigh down his tongue and all he can spit out are phrases of malice. “being a good boyfriend? fucking her right?” 

satisfaction curls around rin’s beating heart as isagi looks to him; wide eyed and bewildered. there’s nothing like reminding someone where they belong in the food chain. beneath rin itoshi and never above. isagi flounders like a fish before him, searching for words of defence that never come and when rin thinks that the shorter of the two might finally say something — the door to the locker room creaks open and in comes…

you.

if there’s another thing that rin hates, it’s how weak you make him feel — especially when he knows that you’re out of reach. not his to touch. to hold. to keep. you can’t be the reason he feels so open an exposed, like a patient on an examiners table, because he can’t have feelings for you anymore, because you belong to isagi. your heart beats for him and that makes rin sick. 

he wants to hate you, even though you’re sweet and kind and understanding. even though you step into the room wearing isagi’s number with doe eyes that glisten underneath the white artificial light. even though your voice fills him with warmth when you call out for your boyfriend (not him) and say. “yoichi, is everything okay?” in that mawkish tone that sends shivers down the length of rin’s spine. 

and like he’s been snapped out of a trance, isagi looks away from rin’s face and searches for comfort in your own — his body instinctively gravitating towards you for affection. “yeah precious, what are you doing here?” he grins at you like he wasn’t just about to rip rin’s throat out with his teeth. “thought i was meeting you outside.” 

“yeah but…some of the other boys and your manager got worried that something was happening between you and rin, so i came to check on you…i hope that’s okay?” you’re so good, well behaved and it’s all for isagi. it makes rin want to scream, rip his hair out, hurt something but he can’t. he won’t because he’s never been good at feelings. he has his older brother to thank for that. 

rin watches the interaction between you both like he’s on the outside looking in. isagi treats you like you’re the world encompassed into one being. yet, there’s a glint swirling in those ocean eyes rin despises so much. “more than okay, baby…actually, i think you might be able to help us make up.” isagi hums, twirling you in his arms until your back is to his chest and you’re facing rin now too.

“…i can?” regrettably, your interest is piqued. isagi has that look in his eye, the one that he gets when he’s scheming and he has all the cards in his hands. except this time, he’s not looking at you. 

rin itoshi seems to be the target of your boyfriend’s games tonight — and you, a mere chess piece on the board. 

“mhm…” yoichi’s voice drops, brushing over the patch in your brain that controls your pleasure. you know that voice, you’ve heard it a million times before…during showers, early in the morning, right after games. the way he speaks switches up whenever isagi wants you. “you see, pretty girl, rinnie over here—“ the striker juts his chin out in the direction of his rival, using the sweet little nickname he knows you have for him. “doesn’t think i can be a good boyfriend, thinks i’m embarrassing, thinks i can’t fuck. would you say any of those statements are true?”

you frown, lips drawn into pout and brows creased where they meet in the centre. “n-no! of course not.” 

and rin thinks he might die there and then, with you looking at him like you’re disappointed in his opinion. 

for as long as he’s known you, you’ve never cared about the feud between himself and your partner but this particular comment seems to bother you. upset you. and as much as he pretends to be indifferent towards you, the last thing rin itoshi wants to do is hurt your feelings. he’s never quite known what it’s like to care for someone — aside from sae, pre-spain. so for him to consider your feelings with every interaction you have is weird, at least for him. you’re a baffling enigma to rin, he finds himself drawn to you like a moth to a candle flame and finds comfort in your sugary conversation and polite laughter. 

you seemed to like rin, for all his awkwardness and lack of charm. you had once called him cute despite his rough exterior and cold nature — leading him to believe that he could maybe try a little harder for you, be with you. that was, at least, until isagi came along and swept you off your feet with boyish smiles and rose tinted cheeks.

isagi could do with you what rin couldn’t do for himself. 

be open with his admiration for you.

for a second, you cut the connection between rin’s aquamarine eyes and your own to glance back up at your boyfriend. 

“we should prove him wrong, then.” 

“but rinnie— i mean, rin,” you correct yourself when isagi tightens his grip on you as you try to diffuse the situation as best you can. “he wouldn’t… he doesn’t care about stuff like that. i know you’re a good boyfriend. isn’t that all that matters?” but in a twisted sort of way, you like that he’s a little pissed off, that rin is there watching you all loved up on each other too.

you feel his excitement press into your behind, arm wrapping around your tummy this time. “you’re all that matters to me,” isagi affirms because it’s true. he shouldn’t really care what rin thinks, but he left his rationality on the pitch. he’s pissed off and he lost and all he can think about is fucking you up and proving his point. soothing his ego. his flirtatious voice tickles the shell of your ear and sends a strong current of electricity straight down to your centre. “but baby, i wanna fuck you. don’t you want him to watch? help me prove that i’m so fucking good to you?” 

he just can’t let it go, not this time. 

is it because he thinks rin’s words are true? that he’s not good enough for you? that you might even deserve better than a man that puts his heart and trust into soccer? 

yoichi loves you so much he think he might rip stars from the sky, and maybe the the sun if you’d asked him to. he’s so good to you, he knows that. you know it too, but he wants to prove it. 

have the one up on rin just this once. 

you give a slight nod of your head because maybe you’re just as much of an egoist as isagi. you don’t want him to doubt himself, he’s the best in japan. in the world. at soccer, at loving you too. he deserves to show off that much. so you agree, hesitantly, “but, yoichi… rin is still…” you say. not that you care, you’ve partially forgotten that itoshi still exists — isagi’s loving touch as he feels you up from over your jersey provides a perfect distraction. 

he’s always like this with you, makes you feel like you’re the only two people in the room.

“don’t worry precious. he’ll look but he won’t touch, unless he asks and you say yes. right, rinnie?” 

it’s the first time in minutes that either of you finally acknowledge rin. the stretching silence filled with ragged breathing and the rustling of clothing as rin watches you lose yourself to lust. to isagi.

“right.” he scoffs like he doesn’t care, barely able to tear his eyes away from your slither of skin revealed as you pull up your jersey to give isagi better access.

“spread your legs baby, lemme see that pretty pussy. wanna show her off.” isagi hums in satisfaction but he doesn’t push, letting you lead. “you want it any way, precious? tell me what you need, i’ll give it to you.” his hands run down to your soft tummy, resting just above the hem of your boy shorts while he grinds into you from behind. “just wanna make you feel good.”

choices, choices.

the ghost of yoichi’s touch along your skin, a thumb on your faint adam’s apple, then over your nipple — it makes saliva pool heavily on your tongue and your eyelashes flutter. “w-what do you think, rinnie?” you gasp, lifting your head to face him. 

the younger itoshi swallows thickly. “fingers.” he says without hesitation. “you gotta prep her first, idiot.”

“still so rude, rin,” your boyfriend tuts mockingly. “c’mere. get ‘em nice and wet for her.” isagi points to his mouth — gesturing for his rival to open up for his fingers. 

“fuck off, isagi. i-i’m not— you’re not going anywhere near me.” 

“oh come on, you’re the one that wanted to prep her. my girl can take it with or without.” isagi presses, the corner of his mouth twitching up into a cocky smirk. “this was your decision, remember?” 

the mere thought of doing anything remotely sexual with yoichi has the fortress of rin itoshi’s mind crumbling, starting with it’s foundation. he’s not disgusted by the idea, no, but he fears letting his mask slip. “if you’re not willing to take care of her properly, then you’re just proving my point. you’re half-hearted. lukewarm. you don’t care to fuck her proper.” rin scoffs, ignoring the shake in his voice.

“please, rinnie,” you hiccup. “he won’t touch me if you don’t…p-play along.” 

but when it’s you, rin can’t ever seem to say no to you.

you’re like a siren calling out to him to drown himself in all that he desires — your saccharine and salacious strings of words setting his insides alight with wanton. begrudgingly, rin strides towards you both and grabs your boyfriend’s wrist with flaming cheeks, heart hammering in his chest so hard he’s afraid you might hear it and think him weak. 

the gentle part of his lips encircle two of isagi’s fingers and is tongue, once tucked away behind rows of brilliant white teeth, breaks free from its barrier to roll over the slender digits — glazing them in a of spit. rin feels degraded, it pours through him in the same thickness as his blood and replaces all the oxygen in his lungs. but then you look at rin like you want him, dainty gaze honed in on the way his tongue weaves between your boyfriend’s fingers and soaks them in his claim. he can’t help but grow more confident in the action.

but then yoichi reminds you both of his presence, thrusting into rin’s obedient mouth until his gags and his tropical ocean eyes blow wide in shock at the sound. isagi’s own blue pair drown in mirth. 

“satisfied?” rin let’s your boyfriend go with a wet smack of his lips, rasping his words out as he regains his breath. 

“not really, but she can help with that.” isagi sounds like he adores you, plunging his spit slicked fingers past your swell of your plump lips so you can get them even wetter for him. you seem eager, sucking on them as if you’re chasing the younger itoshi sibling’s flavour and the visuals make his cock twitch behind his elasticated shorts as he pictures you mouthing at the ache between his legs. 

once isagi is truly satisfied, he pulls out of your mouth and pats your cheek lovingly. “did such a good job, precious. i’m gonna touch you now, okay?” he doesn’t wait for you to respond since you’re too delirious, giggling on trickles of ecstasy from being pampered in your lover’s hold. his hand slips in between your plush thighs and underneath your clothes easily, yoichi dragging a single digit along the length of your puffy folds to get a feel for just how messy you are. you’re dripping with sweet juices, the scent of you intoxicating and potent to both boys as isagi eases the finger past your clenching hole experimentally. 

you hiccup and tremble, your head rolling back against his shoulder the more his thickness presses into you and stretches you out for later. rin can see just how much you make isagi’s skin shine with your wetness, clear strings of it oozing down your thighs and into the seat of his rival’s palm — all this from being barely touched? from watching rin suck on your boyfriend’s fingers so pathetically? you’ve barely been touched as it is.

it only makes the throb at rin’s core that much more painful. 

“don’t you even think about touching yourself to this. you’re lucky enough to even be watching her,” blue lock’s shining star grunts out to rin possessively, his voice laden with a lust that scratches at his throat. you whine out for more, hips jutting downwards to chase more of isagi and his attention switches back to you. “sorry for the wait, precious. there we go, is this alright? is this how you want it?” his softness has you melting like butter in a pan, isagi easing a second finger alongside the first before he curls them to bare down harshly on your g-spot.

the moan that escapes you is a far cry from your angelic nature in rin’s eyes, reminding him that isagi’s the one who cast you out of heaven. “m-more yoichi,” you squirm impatiently, back arching away from the striker’s chest as he used his free hand to toy with yours. “faster, c’mon—!”

“alright baby, relax. we’ll do whatever you want.” isagi moans back desperately, as if your pleasure is his pleasure. he changes the angle of his hand so that the back of it is facing rin, creating the visual of him cupping your sweltering, glistening pussy. you drool into the seat of his palm while he works you open, stroking your velvet and sopping insides like the tide lapping at the shoreline to indulge you and build the pressure that bubbles just under your naval. “oh, you like that? want me to rub your clit too? just like that precious,” 

the rough pad of his thumb draws signatures of love against your budding clit as your arousal pearls on it it. every push and pull of isagi’s fingers have you a syrupy mess, glinting under the artificial lights and only drawing rin’s eager gaze to the treasure between your thighs. when he looks to your face all he sees is your insatiable appetite and dire need to run after the high your boyfriend plans to give you. 

rin’s tongue darts out to wet the crack on his lips and he attempts to swallow the saliva that coats his tongue and floods his mouth — making it difficult for him to breathe. and if he does, manage to breathe in, the scent of you is intoxicating and fills rin with a level of desire his body can’t even handle. shame brews below the surface level of his skin, intertwined with the blood cells that surge through his veins and right to the tip of his shaft. 

he flinches as it pulses to life inside his briefs, pathetically wet from how wet you sound. 

“listen to that, fuck,”  isagi groans, his lashes fluttering against the side of your face the deeper he plunges two fingers into you. “cunt sounds so pretty baby. sucking me in like that, s’like you never wanna let me go.” 

the way isagi touches you is intoxicating — casting a dark veil over every thought that dares to cross your mind and clouding your better judgement. with him it’s easy to be this vulnerable and allow yourself to crumble to pieces in front of the hawk-like gaze of someone you know all too well. you find yourself not caring about the way rin watches you, pools of tropical ocean eyes dropping from your eyes to your pulsing sex where your boyfriend pinches and toys with your folds to get you wetter and wetter.

you’re fucking enjoying this. isagi knows it. rin knows it — the three of you trapped under the spell and vulgar scent of sex that mingles with the air you breathe in. you hardly feel bad for teasing the poor itoshi baby like this, finding the shaky mewls and squeals that you usually save for your boyfriend are a little louder than usual — spiking even higher when blue lock’s star egoist pulls back the hood of your clit to maximise your sensitivity and receptiveness to his touch, rubbing your juices into the little nub. 

“tell him how good it feels.” yoichi is so loving but oh so condescending, commanding the will of your body as he curls his fingers just right to brush over the spongy spot inside of you to make you see the gates of heaven. 

your pretty pussy gushes in response before you can, milky white running down isagi’s forearm as it gathers in the seat of his palm. you’re desperate to speak, but your mouth feels as if it’s been stuffed with cotton and your words are replaced by shaky and choked moans. between being finger fucked to the brink verge of collapse and watching rin try to grind against his boxers for friction — you don’t know how your boyfriend expects you to form a cohesive thought, let alone speak. 

still, you manage to stutter out some kind of praise to him. “oh god, f-fuck, yoichi!”

when isagi hits your g-spot, you spasm so hard you think you might die and at the same time, rin’s needy whimper echoes around the locker room as if to taunt him.  “she’s close,” rin bleats, the pain in his cock becoming too much to bare as he fumbles over the front of his shorts to reprehensibly relieve himself. “aren’t you gonna make her cum?” 

the question is meant with no malice or harm — more innocent than rin allows himself to appear and isagi quickly picks up on it, licking a hot stripe up from the base of your neck to just behind your ear. “you can always tell when my precious girl is close,” he scissors his fingers along your insides, clear strings of your arousal keeping him tied to you. “she clenches so fucking tight around me, like she wants to make me a mess and claim me. keep me all to yourself, right precious?” he coos to you slyly, stroking you into the shape of him and flicking at your clit — arousal gathering copiously between your pussy lips. “you wanna cum so bad, don’t you.” 

“y-yes!” you nearly scream, legs buckling beneath isagi’s ministrations, pumping in and out of your velvet walls with newfound motivation. 

pleasure grows inside of you bit by bit, as if isagi has laid the foundation for bricks of pleasure to stack up high and the fact that rin itoshi is watching you just cements it all together. “make yourself useful, and hold her up.” he instructs, lazily sucking marks into your skin. “so selfish, rin. just like always. getting yourself off while my precious girl’s a shaky mess. you could have been helping all this time.” 

a smile that could rival the devil’s tugs at your boyfriend’s wet lips when rin staggers forward to hold you up in the comfort of his arms. the path to what he wants has always been clear and isagi plays on that like it’s a part of the game you all play — knowing that rin would never give up the chance to hold you this close. you can feel the outline of his bulging cock against your tummy, the thought of it grinding inside you alongside isagi’s fingers doing nothing to sedate the desire coursing through you. your selfish need to cum. 

blood rushes through rin’s ears at he way you cling onto him life a lifeline. you might be creaming on yoichi’s thick fingers, letting them stretch you out in preparation for his even thicker dick, but right now — you need rin to ground you and keep you back down on earth. 

“can’t,” you whine over the lewd slushy sounds reverberating from between your thighs,  and bat your eyelashes up at the younger itoshi — pride internally rumbling in your chest as the black abyss of his pupils swallows his pretty green eyes. “can't hold it, ‘ichi.” there’s nothing greater to you than humbling someone like rin itoshi. he forgets that while you follow whatever pleasure is given to you, you’ll always be loyal to yoichi isagi. hearing you moan his name only shatters rin’s confidence. 

“let go for me, baby. cum all over me like the good girl i know you can be,” a deep groan takes hold in isagi’s chest, roots intertwining with his lungs and his very being. much like a sturdy tree. his thumb goes back to signing his name over it, gaze honing in between the sinful movement beneath your clothes. “get on your knees, rin. see how i fuck her nice and good.” 

doing as he’s told, rin bites back his humiliation and sinks to his knees before you — keening into your fingers as they move up to grip his broad shoulders and your nails dig into his milky flesh hidden by his kit. from here, gets a front row seat to your gushing sex and how it soils the tiny threads of your boy shorts stuffed between your fattened pussy lips. 

sex crazed hormones drift into the air, rattling about and colliding with kinetic energy as isagi picks up the pace — the seat of his palm now grinding against your clit, rubbing you raw and relentlessly. he bites down on your pulse point, and that’s really all it takes to throw you over the ledge. the stacks of ecstasy that had been building within the depths of your soul finally come crumbling down and your release shoots out of you, slapping to the floor in a crude manner.

“o-oh! ‘m c-cumming!” you cry out, feeling evidence of your orgasm blaze a trail down your inner thighs in clear streams as isagi guides you through it. rin doesn’t bother fighting his biological instincts, craning his head up for just a taste, a smell, anything — your sugary and musky scent sending him spiralling while heady precum oozes from his time painfully. 

“ah, ah fuck, baby. keep that orgasm goin’ for me, keep cumming. so pretty.” soft praises fall on your ears despite the white noise that overwhelms you, letting yoichi control the way you twitch and react with his large hands still working you through it all — perfectly nestled between your trembling thighs. you came so much, so sweet.” 

it’s like yoichi is in awe of you, kissing your cheek as you come down from your high — still clenching and fluttering around his fingers. the pair of you forget about rin sitting on the floor between your legs — bearing witness to the way your orgasm rhythmically drips out of you. it’d be foolish for both boys not to become obsessive over the way you guys. slowly, one of your hands leaves rin’s muscled shoulder to grip your boyfriend’s hair and tug him into giving you a wet and loving kiss.

“you always make me cum so hard, yoichi,” you praise him, your shaky voice sounding angelic to both men. “thank you, baby.” 

still licking his way into your mouth, isagi sighs in content, circling his hips into your ass. “all i wanna do is make you feel good,” he breathes his want into you. “are you okay to keep going? we can stop right here. rin doesn’t have to see anymore.” 

it’s only then that  you remember rin between your legs, discreetly humping the floor for some relief — practically shaking at how bad he wants you.

“you need me,” you say, hunger curling around the tone in your voice. “we can keep going.” 

isagi fucking loves you. he’s sure he’s never quite met anyone on the same level of ego and desire as him. maybe you’re both insane, beyond the brink of normalcy with enough danger between you to destroy the whole world — but instead you stick to ruining the man before you both, ripping his ego down until it’s nothing but measly pieces and rin itoshi can no longer look either of you in the eye.

a pair of eager lips land on yours once again — tasting of freshly cut grass and the sweat on your lover’s Cupid’s bow. you suck and bite on one another, leaving your claim visually on each other while your hearts remain tied. isagi grabs at your fleshy ass cheeks, takes your tongue down his throat and lets you own him just as much as he owns you while rin bares witness to your boiling and passionate love. 

familiar hands yank down your shorts and underwear in one go — desperately exposing your hot skin to the air conditioned room, causing a wave of goosebumps to erupt over your body in anticipation. excitement. “i wanna fuck you so bad, i can’t ever get enough of you, precious girl.” he whispers menacingly against the shell of your ear, like it’s a threat but instead directed towards the man at your feet. “‘m so lucky,” his hands wander again, cupping your cunt squeezing your waist and pulling the sweetest sounds from between your lips. “being the only one to have you like this.”

once again, you collapse forward and dig your nails into rin’s shoulders — relishing in the way he looks up at you like you’re a forbidden prize to be won. an angel. a diety. you smile at him, innocent and cute, whimpering a breath’s width away from rin’s lips as isagi arches your back for himself — peeling apart your juicy ass cheeks to set his sights on your glistening pussy. your squelching hole pulses around nothing, sending beading droplets of your arousal through your folds.

“hi rinnie,” you simper and struggle to keep your gaze focused on the athlete, feeling isagi rub his seedy hot cockhead against the entire length of his sex. teasing the both of you. “how’s are you doing?”

there’s so much he wants to say to you. to do to you. if rin had a little more confidence and higher self esteem — maybe he could acknowledge his feelings, he could kiss you, make you his, make you forget all about isagi. but rin is a coward paralysed by his own fear of feeling something real. he lets you walk all over him instead. both of you. 

“i’m good, how are you feeling?” he mumbles in response, all needy-like. you almost feel bad for him, revelling in the way rin tracks your moans, his mouth dropping open just like yours when yoichi drives his hips forwards and bullies his heavy cock past your fluttering entrance. “f-fuck, you’re so…”

“so what, r-rinnie?” 

“so pretty.”  

his eyes shine when he speaks, glossy with desire causing pride to curl around your heart and fan the flames of debauchery inside of you. isagi pulls back, his brows creasing in the centre of his sweaty forehead as he adjusts his tender grip on your hips and pulls his cock from the snugness of your drenched heat. he thrusts forward, hitting every pleasure spot he’s ever mapped out along the length of your slippery walls, making you shudder and press your forehead to rin’s for support. 

“pretty girl, how are you still so…” isagi grunts, high-pitched and borderline whiny, choking on the spit that pools against the pad of his tongue and slips out of the corner of his mouth. “so fucking tight. god, i needed this. needed you.” 

the way in which isagi yearns for you will never fail to make you melt, following your biological instinct which tells you to push your hips back and throw your ass back on him too. “it’s all for you, yoichi,” you drawl, a wet sigh lying on your glossy lips while your boyfriend's milky tips drags along your insides, churning you up just as he kisses your cervix. rin’s face crumples and you feel a little mean for getting lost in his rival right before his very eyes — but the other half of you enjoys the psychological torment  you’re putting him through. 

you like how at any point he could have gotten up and left yourself and isagi to your fun. but rin stays, because he likes the position of vulnerability you put him in. he trusts you, both you and isagi. 

yoichi pacifies himself by latching into your shoulder with pointed teeth, licking over the bite marks as his chest rumbles in content and his hips set a steady stream to fuck you with. his dark hair tickles your skin every time he pumps his cock in and out of you, feeding your body his lust for you and painting you with opaque layers of pre between your thighs. it mixes with your arousal, clear strings slinging against your legs each time isagi’s balls tap at your sensitive clit.

he breathes his ego into you, making your face burn, making you cry out until your throat is raw. isagi has always been able to fill you up so good, his cock is pretty — decorated with spiralling blue and green veins that hit spots you can’t reach with your fingers while is shaft slightly curves, up just enough to never leave your g-spot. even when he’s fucking you from behind. 

“oh precious girl, that’s it, throw it back on me,” isagi slurs, hardly able to focus on anything aside from the way you take him in — the lewd pap, pap, pap of your pussy rippling around him. “show me how you want it. how you want me to use this cock for you.” 

isagi tells you encouragingly between thready breaths. he’s always been a giver, his pleasure has always been your pleasure and his end goal to make you see stars when you cum. like you, isagi always finds a way to get what he wants. and he wants you to lose your mind to him. in front of rin. 

“right there, yoichi — need you right there!” comes your heavenly little whine as you throw your head back onto his shoulder for the nth time that evening. your attention tears away from rin for only a second, giving him the perfect view of your breasts that bounce as yoichi pounds you from behind and the crystallised beads of sweat that run down the collum of your throat. “y’so big, oh my god.”

“you, hah, you hear that rin? she keeps cryin’ my name, praising me like i’m her fucking god.” he somehow manages to snap to his rival.  

you have an inkling that yoichi going insane since his voice drips with a huskiness that lowers its octave.  he seems to lose his goal, however, succumbing to your selfish cunt that refuses to let him pull out and forces the striker to keep his thrusts deep and targeted inside of your heated core. 

bliss is pungent in the air, lays heavy across every inch of your mind and you find yourself succumbing to it — once mover digging your nails into rin’s shoulders until they form pretty crescent moons on the expanse of his milky flesh and you can use him as leverage to fuck yourself back on yoichi’s creamy dick. 

everything sounds so fucking nasty, and rin really can’t fucking help it. all of his shamefulness that once painfully panged at each of his nerve endings seems to have fizzled away into shameless. he finds himself no longer caring that his cock is pulsing from watching his friend ( his rival, his enemy, his … crush? whatever …) fuck the girl of his dreams to high heavens and back. with his emerald gaze laser focused on darting between your viscous and drenched cunt sucking yoichi in, and your angelic expression ( creased brows and perfectly pouty lips) — rin let’s his hand slip beneath his shorts to finally relieve himself of the ache. 

he hissed at the first contact with his erection, the sound quickly turning to pathetic blubbers that make his ears burn red at their tips — because it feels so good. finally touching himself in sync with isagi’s thrusts, getting himself off to the way he fucks you, loves you. torn between wanting to be either of you. it’s a large thing to admit to himself, sifting through a maze of lust, attraction. rin has been chasing after the want to be loved for so long and somewhere along the way it morphed into wanting to be between you both.

he won’t admit it out loud, however, but he feels lucky enough to watch right now. grateful that he pushed isagi this far.

the sounds of him jerking off his crying cock, rubbing at his slit from time to time, merges perfectly with the sinful symphony of your mewls, your cries and the weightly slap of isagi’s skin against your own. his guttural moans too, and his breeder’s balls smacking down wetly on your equally wet, puffy cunt. you catch on first, teary eyes drifting down to the movement beneath the younger itoshi’s clothes and then back up to his face — which looks lighter, relieved and less tense. 

“oh rinnie,” you coo, voice rising an octave — delighted by the sight in front of you and the way in which your boyfriend eagerly chases the hot grip of your abused, leaky hole. “y-you’re so cute… you like watching me get fucked that bad, hm?” 

“y-yes, god yes.” he lets out a choked moan in response, his throat dry from holding back and not having spoken in a while. 

you grin lazily and lift a hand from rin’s shoulder to cup his cheek, brushing away a stray tear with your thumb. one that he didn’t even know had fallen. “you’ve been such a good boy, watching so well ‘n listening to ‘ichi up until now…” even though your voice wavers, and you’re just as submissive to your boyfriend as rin is to you right now — you somehow manage to reach out to him, lick at the longing parts of his soul that crave affection like this. 

“he’s pathetic is what he is,” isagi rears his jealous head while slumping over you — aiming to steal your attention away. he’s rutting into you so fast that you swear you see a blinding white light, gushing down his dick and slicking him all up with your early release. “rubbin’ one off on your stupid cock to my girlfriend even when told not to. seems like you never listen, not on the field. not here. you just live to piss me off, don’t you man.” 

it’s humiliating for rin, but he likes it. stuck between your loving praise and isagi’s harsh words. “seeing her cum for me wasn’t enough for me to prove my point to you, but now she’s on my dick and you still won’t admit it.” he barks but doesn’t let up on fucking you senseless.

the hand that squeezes and tugs at rin’s sorely, hard cock only seems to move faster the more mean, embarrassing shit isagi spews at him. tearing the younger player down but making him feel this amazing. he can’t ignore the small spurts of pre cum that his iron hot tip releases just from having the two of you watching him. it’s evident in the dark stain that seeps through the fabric of his soccer shorts. 

his cheeks are flushed and his eyelids droopy as he looks up at you, palming himself to your very vision of beauty. the three of you are a mess. you can’t help but sequel like a lamb being dragged to slaughter between rin and isagi — who tears you apart by plunging into you as deep as he can go and pieces you back together with sloppy kisses to your back, tonguing at your neck possessively. 

isagi’s veiny hands grab at your ass next to pull you onto his thrusting cock, pushing anything that leaks out of you back into your clenching hole. he peels his sweat soaked chest away from your back and you whimper at the loss of his body heat — only to let out a surprised sob when he spits onto the point at which your bodies join, fucking the froth past your entrance. 

everything your boyfriend does to you, has a snowball effect on rin. he no longer holds back, wildly bucking his hips into his hand wishing it were your sluice sex, or your mouth. dying to have his hands all over you the way isagi does. you terrorise his thoughts but your moans and squeaks soothe him — dragging him closer and closer to his high. you’re dangerous, rin concludes, but it only makes him want to see you like this even more. 

meanwhile, you’re in no better condition — every time isagi bends you over and ravages you like this, you’re reminded of the many reasons why he is blue lock’s star player. his strong build from playing soccer all around the world pays off in he’s with you, making good use of his new found stamina to wreck your entire being and pound you all the way to hell. though yoichi is shorter and lean where rin is taller and agile, he never fails to make your brain void of any thought and your legs soft thighs  with how wet you are. he fucks you like he hates you, like he’s mad at you for your own existence but he speaks to you in ways that emulate love.

“you’re milking me, precious girl,” he mutters as if he’s in awe. “you want my cum that badly? you want me?” yoichi purrs, sending shockwaves through your system and right down to your pelvis — adding to the orgasmic knots that twist there, threatening to unravel at any second. “you’re so pretty, grinding up on me. so dirty, loving how rin watches you. my precious girl.”

“‘m yours, yoichi,” you reaffirm, preening into his touch as it cascades up and down your body like a rushing waterfall. “wanna cum, wanna cum f’you.” 

your admission is like a bullet to the chest for rin but he doesn’t want to give this up, revelling how you look down at him, his milky white dick and his blushing face  with an expression so sweet his teeth might rot and his ears fill with your honey-like voice — melting his brain. he wants this for as long as you’ll give it to him, for as long as isagi will allow him to witness it.

“i know baby, but you know what i want, feels so much better when you wait for me,” your boyfriend’s thrusts begin to grow sloppy and irregular — indicating the approach of his own high. but isagi knows you and your body better than anyone else, knows how to make you cum so hard that you might black out. you love to be edged, and you love him even more so. you’d do whatever he wanted and then some. and he would do the same for you. 

he throbs within your tightness, your pussy papping and pulsating, smeared with isagi’s thick precum that douses your puffy folds in white. the mix froths, creating a foamy ring of white at the thickest point of his length. “p-please, yoichi. i don’t think i can,” you wail in denial like you always do, the sound causing both boys to squeeze the base of their cocks and groan in unison — attempting to stave off their orgasms. “hurts so good.” 

rin is reminded of just how good his rival can fuck you. even when you’re desperate to cum (and he’s just as desperate to watch it happen again) — you still have a burning hunger for isagi to control your ecstasy. he wants to give up control like that too. with you, or with his destined enemy. liquid lust rolls down rin’s dick in large waves, his eyes threatening to roll back as he listens to your moans get higher and higher the closer you are. yoichi is in no better condition, growling and chasing after your cunt as your hips attempt to run away from him. 

“she wants to fucking cum, you idiot.” rin grunts, finding his voice amidst the sound of crying, moaning and skin on skin. “please, let her cum.” 

“why? so you can bust a nut to my fucking girl. jeez, rin. get a fucking grip.” 

maybe this is what makes isagi the bad boyfriend rin so desperately wants to make him. putting his pleasure above your own even though rin knows that’s far from the truth — almost relenting while he jerks off to the same pace that isagi fucks you with. but then you call out to him, like a siren from the high seas.

“rinnie, please touch me. h-help me cum.” 

his body moves on his own accord after that, the hand that’s not getting himself off to you and his so called friend reaching between shaky legs and salty skin to fumble with your clit awkwardly. rin has never touched a girl a girl before, not even like this. but he tries to recreate it in the way that isagi does, to listen to you moan for him and see you tremble above him.

“h-how’s that?” he breathes, watching in awe as your eyes roll back into your skull. 

“more.” you say. barking out the command while your cunt spews a fresh wave of juices onto rin’s hand.

your body seizes up, pleasured from all angles. between yoichi’s cock and rin’s calloused thumb drags random shapes over the pearl between your folds. “motherfucker….”  the curse spills from isagi’s lips before he can stop it and admit how fucking amazing it feels to have you tense around him, warm and wet. it’s worse when rin accidentally catches his cock as it slips in and out of you rapidly, churning up your insides. “fucking bastard. at least touch her properly, rub in circles.” 

rin does what he’s told, following the simple command and obediently flicking at your clit. it’s totally worth it, surrendering his autonomy to the older player just to have you tug at his hair and squeal his name. you jut your hips back and forth, meeting both boys in their bid to make you see heaven. your limbs threaten to give out on you, you pulse and pleasure tremors through you like an earthquake.

“oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck!” you chant like it’s a prayer.

the world around you falls away as you’re finally pushed over the edge — a bright white light flooding your vision accompanied by static fizzling in your ears. rin watches you cum a second time as if he’s witnessing the eight wonders of the world, your cunt flooding with isagi’s cum at the same time that you squirt with ease. his load floods your womb, filling you up to the brim and you feel so good you might die. a scream tearing in your throat and the knots in your lower tummy rapidly unravelling. the both of you cumming together, at last.

you can’t help it, surging forward to press your lips against rin’s, kissing him hazily, your tongue prodding through his lips — licking into his mouth. rin creams his pants at the very sensation, damn near sobbing into your open mouth. “f-fucking christ, that’s so hot.” isagi whines, slowly pulling out of you and letting the crude mix of your arousals hit the floor. 

it’s only then that rin realises love is not binary.  there are no clear paths to achieving the perfect love. there hat tricks or dribble techniques. love is unwinding and binding and there are too many possibilities. and that scares rin, for him to love a girl he can’t have.

your knees buckle under the exhaustion of it all and rin reaches out to catch you before you can pull away and the oxygen from reality floods his brain again. he misses you when isagi reaches you first, coddling you in his arms and kissing all over your face to calm you down and reassure you. loving you in ways rin isn’t sure that he’s capable of. 

nosing your cheek, isagi coos out to you — his personality doing a complete 180. “you okay, precious. i wasn’t too hard on you, right?” 

you’re so happy to be in his arms, close to dozing off. “‘m okay, yoichi. you were perfect. you always are. i love you.” 

“do you need help getting to the showers? i can carry you there.” 

eyeing rin on the floor, you look back up to isagi and shake your head adoringly — knowing that they’ll probably need to talk this out without you.

“i’ll be alright, find me when you’re done here. okay?” 

the striker lets you back down and accepts a kiss on the cheek from you. you pad away to wash off — leaving him in silence with his younger counterpart. the tension fails to dissipate as they fix themselves, tucking away their dicks and floundering to speak. 

rin watches the way isagi longingly looks at the door, wanting to be with you instead of dealing with the consequences of his actions. it dawns on him then, that he literally cannot win against isagi, that perhaps he is better than rin in all ways possible. he’s a loser. he lost to you and to isagi. 

“i’m… i’m a good boyfriend. for her, yanno,” isagi says awkwardly after some time, scratching the back of his head shyly. “there isn’t anything i wouldn’t do for her…but how much i love her doesn’t reflect in my plays and she knows that. the way i love her and love soccer are different. i could never blame my mistakes on how much i care for her. it would be on me. like today was on you.” 

rin can only blink back in response. “that’s true. i’m—“ he wants to apologise, but something inside him, something that he’d worked so hard to undo this past hour doesn’t let him. he can’t submit, be truthful and vulnerable. not when the setting isn’t as intimate as before. 

rin still can’t let go. 

something familiar — akin disappointment swirls in the blues and azures of yoichi’s eyes, but he doesn’t comment on rin’s silence. 

it reminds rin of his brother, sae. 

with nothing left to talk about, isagi nods quietly and shoved his hands in his pockets to head for the showers — no doubt to check up on you, be with you openly and happily, but pauses just shy of the door. he throws his head back to address rin once more. 

“oh and by the way,” isagi mumbles, pushing his tongue around inside his mouth and against his cheek. looking for the right words. as if he’s holding back — saying whatever comes next against his will. “she did really like you. so, every day i have to prove to her that i was the right choice, the better one. a good boyfriend. so don’t get it twisted. alright?”

he makes his exit shortly after — leaving the younger player with no time to respond.

and rin can’t tell if those words were supposed to comfort him or not. in fact, all they do is make him feel worse. 

[moni-logues]

Paris

Pairing: Hoseok x reader

Genre: pwp/smut

Summary: It's your birthday and Hobi decided to surprise you with a flight to Paris so you could be together.

Content: oral sex (m. and f. receiving), throat fucking, multiple orgasms, unprotected sex, semi-public sexual activity (up against the window), there's a very little bit of crying during/after sex

Word count: 2.5k

A/N: sometimes you have some of the worst days of your life and are sure you will never, ever want to write anything (or live lol) ever again and then later, after one (1) SSRI and your period arriving, you are suddenly normal (lmao '''''normal'''') again, which is to say that, if I could have, I would have posted this on Monday when I should have because that's when it was @amethystwritesbts's birthday and this is FOR HER. So sorry for the delay, bb, and I hope you enjoy, no one else's opinion matters lmao byeee😘😘😘

“This is amazing,” you breathed as you turned a slow circle around the hotel suite, trying to take it in. “You know you didn’t have to do this.” 

“I know,” Hoseok answered, taking you by the hand and leading you to the window, out of which you could see the Eiffel Tower, so close you couldn’t see its top without craning your neck skywards. “I wanted to. Well, actually, I was going to apologise to you; I really wish I had been able to fly to you, rather than making you come all this way.” 

Schedules were schedules and Hoseok was not always in control of his; if he had been, he would not have let anything take him from you on your birthday. Fortunately, he did at least have the resources to bring you to him, even if for a shorter time than either of you would have liked. 

“Are you crazy? It’s Paris! I would’ve flown to the back-end of nowhere to see you, but this is Paris! This is incredible! Thank you.” 

Hoseok wrapped his arms around you from behind and held you tight. 

“Only the best for my birthday girl.” 

He kissed your cheek and you hummed contentedly. You looked out at the glittering lights of the city of love and, yes, it was incredible, but it didn’t beat the feeling of your boyfriend’s arms around you, his hair tickling your cheek as he sucked little kisses onto your neck. You opened your mouth to speak; Hoseok stole the breath from your lungs as he opened his lips and bit gently down where your neck meets your shoulder; you gasped softly instead. Twisting in his arms to face him, you pushed back his hair and brought his face to yours.  

The kiss was sweet and gentle for all of one brief second, then it was heavy and pressing and his tongue was swiping your bottom lip, gliding into your mouth, sliding over yours. You moaned as Hoseok stepped forward, pushing you against the French doors, pressing himself against you. You’d missed this: the taste of him, the smell of him, the hard bite of his teeth against your soft skin. You flushed, burning up already, pulling away just slightly, swallowing hard, blinking rapidly, trying to regain some composure. 

“I think I like Paris,” you said, breathless and giddy, giggling. 

He hummed with his mouth on your neck, a little buzz on your skin that sent goosebumps shivering across it. 

“Paris, huh?”  

“Yeah, Paris.” 

He brought his face back to yours; his dark eyes sparkled and a grin spread across his face as he pressed his forehead into yours. 

“Well, I love... Paris.” 

“Yeah, I’ve really missed Paris.”  

“I’ve missed Paris, too,” he whispered.  

He touched his lips to yours lightly, but you wanted more. You pulled him closer, bit into the soft, sweet flesh of his bottom lip, and ran your tongue across it. He rolled his hips into yours and you could feel his hard cock already straining against its confines, pressing into you; the thought of it, your lips around it, your cunt squeezing it tight, sent sparks straight to your core. Hoseok tipped his head back when you left kisses on his neck, across his shoulder. Then you sank to your knees. 

“Hey,” he said softly, pushing your hair from your face. “It’s not my birthday.” 

You shrugged. 

“Will be soon enough. And we won’t both be in Paris for it.”  

You pulled his trousers down to his ankles and his boxers followed. Your mouth watered at the sight of him; your clit throbbed; he was hot and hard and he twitched when you opened your mouth and placed him on your soft, wet tongue. Hoseok groaned, looking down at you, your eyes wide and expectant. He threaded his fingers carefully through your hair and held you firm while he rolled his hips, sliding into the wet heat of your mouth. You sealed your lips around him and hollowed your cheeks, moaning to encourage him. He cursed quietly under his breath and pushed further, his cock trespassing on the tight clutch of your throat. You breathed carefully through your nose and, with your hands on the backs of his thighs, pushed until your nose hit his skin, your throat bulging with him. 

He groaned as he pulled back out and started a smooth, slow rhythm, his own breathing also careful, his eyes fluttering shut, his jaw slack. You blinked up at him as tears sprung and overflowed down your cheeks, as drool pooled in your mouth, slid down your chin, dripped onto your chest. He opened his eyes and looked down at you with black, laser-focused eyes; he usually hated making a mess but not when it was you. Not when your eyes were shiny and wet, your tears glistening in the light like stars; not when the collar of your T-shirt was dark with drool, the long column of your neck, bulging, dripping; not when your throat was so warm and tight, squeezing as you half-swallowed against him; not when he could see your hand between your legs, rubbing circles over your leggings. 

You were uncomfortably wet beneath them, your underwear sticky with it, your walls quivering in anticipation of him already. Your heart was racing and your desperation sat low and heavy in your core, the aching for him almost painful. You were about to pull back, stop, stand and finally divest both yourself and him of your clothes, finally get him naked and get him where you most wanted him, but he beat you to it, stepping backwards and dropping out of your mouth with a gasp. 

He fell to his knees in front of you and crashed his mouth into yours with enough force to knock you backwards, hitting the French doors with a thud. 

“Fuck,” he whispered. “Sorry, baby. You ok?” 

You only nodded, leaning in when he pulled you forward, leaning back when he lifted your T-shirt over your head. You threw your hands behind your back, unclasping your bra and shrugging it off your shoulders as he pulled at the waistband of your leggings and underwear at once, tugging them to your knees, waiting for you to stand so he could take them all the way off.  

He kicked off his trousers and boxers, still around his ankles, and ripped off his shirt, leaving them piled on the floor, forgotten already.  

You wondered if anyone could see you, your bare body pressed against the cold glass, several floors up but not high enough to go unnoticed. The thrill of it made you shudder; you wanted everyone to see, everyone to know. That he was yours. That only he got to fuck you like this. That only you got to fuck him like this. You whined as he pressed two fingers into your tight, slick heat, gasped as he ground his palm into your clit, unable to stop your hips jerking and rolling against it.  

“You’re so fucking wet, baby,” he growled in your ear, nipping at your earlobe. 

“Yeah,” you gasped in reply. “Well, I real-, I really ah, missed.... Paris.” 

You felt his smile stretch across your skin and the little jet of his hot breath as he chuckled on his exhale.  

“Paris, huh. You want to get fucked by Paris, do you, baby? Want all of Paris to hear you whining and moaning and coming with me?” 

You could only respond by doing just that, whining and moaning, and, as his fingers curled firmly and repeatedly against your front wall, and the heel of his hand pressed hard against your clit, and his mouth sucked hot, wet kisses on your neck, you came. Your legs shook as sparks shot through you, electric heat buzzing from your core to your extremities, shivering through you, sprinkling your skin with goosebumps. Your knees buckled and Hoseok caught you, took your weight as you steadied yourself. You breathed heavily with your forehead against his shoulder and let him lift you, but then he was turning to take you to the bed— 

“No,” you said, pressing a hand to his shoulder. You shook your head. “I want you to fuck me here.” 

His eyebrows shot to his hairline and his tongue flicked out over his bottom lip. He gently let you go, your feet touching back down onto the plush hotel room carpet. He caged you in against the glass, traced your body with his eyes, fisted his flushed dick, still wet from your mouth, and finally fixed you with a smirk. 

“You want me to fuck you against this glass door? You want everyone to see?” His voice was low, almost taunting, travelling straight to your cunt. 

“Yes,” you answered, your own voice high and tremulous with need.  

“You want everyone to know how good I can give it to you, huh?”  

You nodded fervently. 

“Good. Then I’ll give them a show.”  

He dropped to his knees and wasted no time re-acquainting his mouth with your thighs, the crease of your hip, your lips, your wet, quivering core, your clit, swollen and sensitive. You keened and your back arched against the door, your hands grasping the soft curtains before thinking twice and grabbing his hair instead. He moaned as you tangled your fingers in the soft, dark strands, tugging and gripping.  

A plea was forming on your lips, for more, for something to fill the aching emptiness in your cunt as his tongue laved over your clit; Hoseok pushed two fingers into you and then a third; the request died on a hitched breath, filled before you had to ask. He moaned against you, the vibrations in his lips buzzing against you as he played you perfectly, practised and precise. 

Your nails scraped his scalp when the pleasure bundled up within you, coiling tight like a spring. You were shaking with it, trembling as it crept faster and faster towards its crescendo, then shuddering and jerking as it burst free. Your body flooded with heat as you gushed into Hoseok’s face, over his hand, down his wrist. You sank, weakly, to the floor, shivering under the warmth of his touch.  

He pressed a kiss against your shoulder and another on your collarbone, leaving sticky prints on your flushed, glowing skin. With arms that felt like lead, you pulled on his hair again, bringing his face to yours, mashing your lips against his, opening your mouth to him, tasting all of you and a little of him and still desperate for more. With his hands around your waist, he manoeuvred you, lay you down, one side of you cold against the glass, the other warm in the heat of the room. He began to pepper kisses across your chest, swirling your nipple in his mouth, grazing it with his teeth, moving across to the other.  

“Hobi, please,” you panted. “Please just fuck me. Don't wait any more. Fuck-- please, please.” 

He knelt above you, looking down at you with a wide smile. He leant down and pressed a sweet kiss to your lips. 

“Your wish is my command, birthday girl,” he murmured, his lips moving against yours, before he kissed you again, deeper this time, sucking your bottom lip into his mouth, eliciting a weak moan from yours.  

He pulled back to line himself up with you and watch himself disappear into the hot slip of your wet cunt. He groaned and paused, fully sheathed, luxuriating in the feeling of your walls quivering against him, tight and stretched. He grinned at you as he rolled his hips and began to thrust, hard and slow. Your fingernails scraped at his arms, climbing, pulling him down. He rested on his forearms, nudged your nose with his, and you took whatever words he was about to say, swallowed them down with your lips on his. He groaned when you lifted your legs, hooking them over his hips, your pelvis tipping so that the head of his cock brushed repeatedly against your g-spot like a hotkey for pleasure, over and over again.  

Your head was swimming, flooded, drowning in him: the soft sweep of his hair over his forehead, little damp strands stuck with sweat at his hairline; the softness of his warm skin and his breath washing over you; his quiet grunts of effort, his whispered praise, the way your name sounded tripping off his tongue, the hitched breath and interrupted curse when you clenched him tighter. It hadn’t even been that long that he’d been away but it was long enough.  

You squeezed him with your legs, trying to press him closer, bring his chest to yours, to meld yourself with him, to make up for all the time—recently and not so recently—that you’d been apart. It never got easier. And at moments like this, you didn’t know how you survived it, being without this, being without him. With your whole heart and your whole body, you loved him: his taut, lithe body and the way it moved; the mastery he had over it and your body, too; his bursting heart, bright and full and open; his kindness and his generosity; his tenacity and the way he held you, strong, securely, close against him when you needed it.  

As you lurched towards your third orgasm, your heart leapt into your throat and tears pricked in your eyes again—only partly his dick’s fault. Tension coalesced in your abdomen, strength drawn from your limbs, pulling tightly inwards, then erupting forward. You shuddered and gasped and Hoseok gasped above you as you gripped him tight in the vice of your climax. You could hear him, cursing right next to your ear, as if from another room, muffled, far away as you slipped under the waves of an overwhelming pleasure.  

Hoseok came before your cunt stopped spasming, as your thighs still trembled, just as your breathing hitched again and your bottom lip wobbled, tears threatening on your waterline. He felt you shudder as he let himself go, painting your insides white, milking himself in the fluttering of your clutched-tight walls.  

“Hey,” he said softly, turning towards you, a frown pulled tight on his face. “Hey, baby, what’s wrong?” 

You brought your hands to cover your face and shook your head, feeling silly that his concern made you cry harder. You were tired from travelling, discombobulated, overwhelmed, wrung out, fucked out, that’s all. You took a deep breath—tried to take a deep breath as it stuttered in and then wobbled out again—as he pulled your hands away and brushed the tears from your cheeks. He kissed the tracks left in their wake, sweet, soft, little kisses that held the slightest tang of salt. 

“Baby,” he asked again. “What’s wrong? Are you ok?”  

You closed your eyes and held your breath, literally shaking out your hands as if that was where you held your feelings. 

“I just-” you began, opening your eyes to look at him, “- I just really missed Paris, that’s all.” 

He laughed softly and pressed a kiss to your lips.

"I missed you too, baby. I missed you, too."

[trashmouth-richie]

HIH 16

 “Let's have fun tonight, okay?” she begs, “it isn’t every day Eddie’s old decrepit ass turns forty.”  <- I dead ass had a moment of trying to figure out how much of a time jump had passed before reading “he’s twenty nine, Maxine,” 😂

Their cabin home in the woods 🥹

“sorry we’re late, the missus was wrappin’ a last minute gift.” 

Me: Ooh Wayne got himself a lady!

Also me:

“I ain’t here to see you anyhow, came to see my favorite daughter in law to be if you’d just marry her already, didn’t even know it was your birthday you little punk.” 🥹

“I really hope you have liability insurance because Argyle is trying to teach Dustin yoga.”

“Cutting countless heads of hair in the renovated room above Master Mechanic’s, the auto shop Eddie co-owned with Wayne in Bridgeport” YES👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

  “Lady evil at it again,” Eddie teases (Me to Me: UGH REMEMBER HE DEDICATED THAT SONG TO HER AND THEN EVERYTHING WENT TO SHIT??🥲)

He holds his hand on your cheek, sweeping your skin delicately with the pad of his thumb, holding you so gently as if you were made of porcelain, “I’m gonna make you my wife.”  *tears up*

Your fingernails scratch lightly down his chest, skipping over the tattoo of little angel wings and a halo for the unborn child you didn’t get the luxury of holding, matching the one on your inner arm. The date etched below in Eddie’s own handwriting. *FUCKING SOBBING*

Opening your soul to him for the millionth time, spreading its wings and joining with his into that dream land he swore he’d take you to, dancing on the rings of Saturn, bathing in the springs of Jupiter.  <- IT’S BACK😭

ZIGGY!!!!😭 How the hell am I suppose to go through life knowing this series is coming to an end??? I know I’ll gets blurbs and snippets but I just love them so much!😩 I LOVE YOU (AND ALL YOUR WORK). Fantastic as always. 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

god you always always ALWAYS give the best reviews.!!

Hahaha the time jump was necessary bc it’s just been so heavy. The blurbs will take place between now and after the trauma. Hahaha max is such a shit I love her.

HA. Listen Karen needs a *man* and Ted just wasn’t cuttin it. Byeeee

Since we were robbed of Eddie and Wayne I always imagine him to be just a little shit with him but also so serious and giving him the worlds best advice when it matters most.

Huffy Steve is my favorite Steve, I love him 😭

They needed to Gtfo of Hawkins and Bridgeport is the made up town reader lives in in twinflames 😭😭 (y’know? That abandoned fic I have) lol

Lady evil and the little tattoo were things I thought about at the very beginning of this story that I wanted incorporated. 😭💕

that line took me so long to figure out, literally added the day I posted it hahaha

The tattoo for the baby 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 breaking my own heart.

To date that Saturn and Jupiter references are my favorite of all time.

B I love you so so much, you have always been a constant since the very beginning of this silly fucking blog. Hypin me up when you were my only follower lmao. I love you bitch. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[hiodoshi-ao]

Overwhelmed with how amazing today already is and I'm feeling extremely physically ill atm... LmAO Just rolling with it. 😵‍💫

I'm sad I didn't prepare anything for Louis' birthday... I wish I did. Maybe next year if I'm still in the fandom. I might be. I've always low-key been a Louie. You can maybe see his pretty face's influence on the fan art I've drawn of anime boys 😎

I'll be sharing other people's works later maybe today!!! I'm so proud of all the creators in our fandom as well. I was wondering if this fandom was still alive until I ran into a random YouTube comment.

Excuse me, I feel so delirious from how sick I feel. So surprisingly happy too?? I'd take medicine but I've already been taking ibuprofen and acetaminophen almost every day due to other pains... I caught something from my best friend this time. LOL 😅 All the mental pain from this year and the years of holiday trauma didn't prepare me for tonight. I really don't expect anything?? 😭

Another thing, I have some request art for people that I wanted to take care of in 2 days... I almost made it but the last few days were... Extremely heavy and toxic, I'm sorry. I was asking people to request me, too. I'm so embarrassed, but life can be a rollercoaster like that I suppose... 🙁 If either of the two lovely people are reading this, YOU'LL BE HEARING FROM ME SOON HOPEFULLY 😭

All my amazing mooties, artists, writers, editors, and absolutely hILAROUS people I follow, and the people who liked my personal posts before, the people who've been so nice to me here... You have no idea how much you've brightened my asocial ass life. If I sound like a broken record, it's because I am. I really need to reach out to people more, but It's so difficult for me to 🥲

Whether you post(ed) something earlier in the year, today, later, know that I love you, I love you, I love yooouu, thank you for brightening our dashes with your posts!! I'm so proud of you. You have no idea! 🥰

Anyway... because Idk how to change the topic 😓

My sis & I are both sober hobby artists, btw lol

What sprung these feelings... Not the the holiday spirit, tbh, not LOUIS FUCKING TOMLINSON'S BIRTHDAY. (IT'S ADDING TO IT NOW THOUGH LMAO 😭😭😭)

I listened to one of the most engaging & fun No Sleep Podcasts with my sister. It's 1am now but I'll be up for a little longer because she asked. It's all horror. Lol The last one we listened to hit so close to home at one point, but I couldn't completely focus because I was so shook at how my line art was coming out?? I made one of my life achievements before the year ended?? Like wHAT?? IT'S AN X-MAS EVE MIRACLE 😭😭😭

Gonna try to keep it up when I feel less sick... and a lil during. ✌️🤪 I HOPE THIS MEANS YOU ALL WILL GET MORE ART FROM ME??! That's so exciting?? I wanna be more proud of myself on my art journey next year... Once I find a job, a therapist and get on meds again, maybe that could be a reality for me...

My sister also made the most lovely gift for someone on the spot. She doesn't see how absolutely adorable & beautiful it is, but I do. I took some pics cuz it was that satisfying to look at?? I WANNA MAKE FANART OF IT.

We both need to believe in ourselves more... Gonna show her the photos of the cow I took in a couple of months. I hope she sees what I see some day. That's one of my holiday wishes 🥺

[theyarebothgunshot]

this is exactly how it went down in my head.

misha: hey, everything okay? do you need me to do something?

jensen: no, lay low. we’re figuring it out.

misha: got it.

— the next day —

misha: things settled. should i say anything? draw attention? stay neutral?

jensen: you don’t have to, but if you want, tread lightly. we’ve had enough chaos.

misha: say no more.

when nobody got your back you KNOW dmitri got your back.

ANYWAYS i turned my back for TWO MINUTES and y'all went the fuck off in my inbox so, you know the drill: more under the cut

NO BUT JENSEN’S RESPONSE LMAAAAAO honestly fallout theory is so on oh my God I can’t stop-

on god they are so loud like-

Worst damage control i've ever seen. god bles.

so true bestie

I think Jensen probably just wants to be done with this petty little drama, so if he has to pretend everything between them is okay he is going to be the bigger man and lay it to rest. Whatever is going on between them he definitely doesn't want to sort that out on social media and the earlier he pretends everything is sorted out the earlier people will forget about it again.

Also it's kinda funny how J*red Tweet was like implying they had a misunderstanding but still talk to each other regularly, while Jensen went full on the we grow apart a little bit, because we were busy, let's catch back up. Makes me wonder if they actually talked or if there managers just said hey that's not good pr, let's put that to rest. Also did J*red know before yesterday that they had a falling out or did he just not realize.

- 🐌 anon

literally jensen went out of his way to say 'uhhh we never talk, worstie' god if pr management is involved then they did a bad job. also j*red still does not realise they have fallen out. jshfjdsfh

Jackles was like God bless but we ain’t talking like this worstie

good for her.gif

csdsc heeft gevraagd:

All I need now is for Misha to tweet “ is it safe to come out now?” And I’ll be complete lmfao 😂😂😂

that would have been better than what we got lmfao

I have one fear and it's Jensen being forced to add j*red to his show and his other projects because he couldn't stop whining like a baby,,, ugh i hate him

i pretend i do not see

Kinda selfish of me tbh but i don't want them to be "friends" again, Jensen sweetie run as fast as you can

co-signed

Ok Jensen's answer to Jared tweet made me feel so bad for him. Like, I can see it's damage control and public relations (obviously) but there's stuff behind it. I can't name it, but idk, I felt terrible for texas man this time, I don't think that reply was written with a "love and light energy" or even without much care. I felt some heavy vibes.

- 🌻, who is now a fortune teller and a prophet apparently

yeah i feel hella bad for him to, for having to deal with this shit. nonnie please if you ever have anything to predict, lemme know sjdfhs

You know Jensen's tweet has the energy of like kindergarten wenn an other kid started a fight with you and the kindergarten teacher wants you to forgive each other and hung it out and you really don't want to, but your kindergarten teacher is being annoying and he isn't worth the annoyance either.

- 🐌 anon

you are not wrong

Incredibly thankful that I have the day off from work 😂 I'm with hatching chick anon, the 3 dots read as passive aggressive/insincere to me, and I love it! I haven't spent this many hours on tumblr since I first discovered cockles! (On a side note, the lack of fimmf posts today has me feeling like it's not friday lol) -🐢

i, too, miss fimmf but alas things happen, they do they do they do

I was right. :(

It got almost romantic...

👀

nonnie you know i love you but this is really not the case, like, at all??? idk how you could look at those tweets and think it was almost romantic. it was THEE most scripted, pr bullshit ever. it was staged and fake. idk what else to tell ya

Danneel liked Jensen's tweet

i saw

That is so so awkward I feel so sorry for all of us being exposed to this and so happy I chose to leave the Internet for half a day - tea anon

god bless your stance on that cause i would have hated missing out on this lmao

You know what? I think it’s okay being a 38 year old moron if you’re bringing us this type of content

im happy with the food but still think its not okay tbh

pspspsps Misha this is the perfect day for you to drop the gay Cas essay pspspspsp it is still pride month pspspsps

you know you want to king pspsps

So that JIB6 link (I think it was from your post, right?). I went and watched that bit, and a little more.

Jensen makes a comment about Jared being first on the call sheet because Sam was supposed to be the main focal character.

And that him nor Misha cared about what number they were, so in all that time it never changed.

And I’ll be… if that just doesn’t perfectly sum them up and their feelings on things. And how a certain someone can be petty… 🦚

idk if it was from my post? but maybe? my analysis probably? but yeah things are making more and more sense huh

Ohh that's also an alien? Welcome to the extraterrestial family then, purple alien anon!

Also it's probably because I'm coming off the high this drama gave me but I'm not looking forward to them trying so hard to convince us everything is normal between them. Even though we now Know, they will have to keep pretending. Today (yesterday?) was a shitshow but some masks fell off, at least for a moment and I kinda wish Jensen was less professional 😂

👽

oh for real, fallout theory IS confirmed and nothing they said today will change my mind, it only made me believe in it even more lmfao and with that in mind i am just gonna sip my tea if they try to be buddy buddy on main again

I THINK MISHA UNRETWEETED BUT HE TWEETED "LOVE AND MISS YOU BOTH" I'M LOSING MY DIGNITY HERE - tea anon

yeah he now answered them sjdfhsjfhsf instead of rt

MISHA COLLINS IS A KING I STAN THE RIGHT MAN

YOU SURE DO

I just know Misha’s process was oh crap I have to let people know I’m supporting them and I can’t choose sides. Ok. Retweet. NO. Delete. I love both of you. Yes, good.

sjdfsdfh this makes me think of that post that dissected jackles' birthday post for misha where he used the heart. 'call him bro, that makes it less obvious. nailed it.'

Lol I'm off for a few days and come back to total chaos... God I missed it here

Like the "et tu... #bravo" tweet? Made my day! Frikking hilarious (every time I see it I picture J*red with a pissy frech accent saying it out loud lol) it's just such an incredibly petty hissy fit he threw (I know he tweeted more later on but... Really all that stuff coming afterwards just sounds like damage control)

Missed you Rose

-🐻

LOVE the french accent detail im gonna do this too sdjfhsjfh missed you toooo!!!!

Oh man Misha is really gonna get hate for that I KNOW IT

sigh well. nothing he isnt used to by now, unfortunately

i mean i believe they feel like brothers, but constantly falling back on the “brother” thing to keep up appearances is really starting to feel like “#spnfamily” at this point.

honestly brothers can be very annoying, or so i have heard, so it fits with the fallout theory lmao

They actually said if we’re gonna make this gay we cannot have Jar*d Pad*lecki involved

oh my God this is the funniest timeline to ever exist God bless I’m just waiting to canon bi Mary

king shit tbh

[sixthwater]

🐸 Synastry with: a Best-Friend 🐸

This is part of my platonic synastry series, but it's a special edition considering it's their birthday! Well it just passed but I work weird shifts so it's still their birthday So we'll be putting out a friend "episode" before my final family episode.

Note: This is using and based off of personal experience, I will be using specific people and referencing them throughout the post

Me & 🐸's placements

☉: Cancer / Cancer ☽: Taurus / Scorpio ☿: Cancer / Gemini ♀: Cancer / Cancer ♂: Virgo / Virgo

*Fun fact: our MBTIs are INFJ / INTJ respectively lmao

**She has heavy scorpio in her chart while having a jupiter asc. Naturally rosy cheeks + dark make-up. I was once walking down the hallway with a friend of ours and he was very quiet before saying "you know 🐸 wears too much make-up (her cheeks)." ".....That's Just Her Face." , so that's a nice introduction to how her inner placements are playing out before I dive into this.

🦎Overlays

Me: Sun in 8th / 🐸: Sun in 6th

We are best-friends for a reason. There is no obsession here present (which I can attribute to placements and aspects I will bring up later), but we were often found together in high school. Of course there are the "that's my best friend" jokes, but it was never serious. 🐸 often says that I'm her "only friend" but she is very charismatic and has plenty of friends. It's meant more as in "you've seen and know things about me and are still here and I don't know if I can say the same for other people". Which can all be under the 8th house. For the 6th house, I'm serious I basically lived at her house. After school activities we were together, we were in the same group for trips, I joined her for family outings since I was basically adopted, etc. It never felt like a partnership but I do always feel like I need to pay her back, but that's definitely just a me thing lmao.

Me: Mercury & Venus in 8th / 🐸: Mercury & Venus in 5th

Perfect overlays for both of us if I'm honest. The 8th house overlay for Mercury can lead to "mind reading" if that's what you want to call it. We are both not ones to open up easily at all, but I remember when I knew I could trust her. I was in a very dark place in high school and one day I was pretending to be asleep. Our teacher came to her to ask if I was ok and I was about to get up and get back to work before she just told her "she's just tired and taking a nap", which is something very small but during that time she was the first person who picked up on the fact that I wanted to be left alone and I told her that after the teacher left and she brushed it off lmao. A mercury 8th house overlay can cause that "no words needed" feeling. For venus-- well we're both art kids so...but seriously we've both entrusted each other with heavy secrets or moments in our life (I'm sorry my mercurial mind is scrambled and I can't remember clearly I swear I just mix shit up!!!!). For the 5th overlays, yeah we're annoying LMAO. I don't know how to explain it. The 8th overlays don't feel that heavy because we're being very stupid and doing stupid shit most of the time, even during the shitty times? To feel better? It's very much like that audio of linkin park's numb put to an 80s aesthetic? I usually very much like to be fucking left alone besides for the few people that get to annoy me and I like to annoy for hours and she's one of them. We usually spent the entire day hanging out whenever she had time, traveled to different cities close by, visited museums, have a bunch of inside jokes--honestly this is like. Absolutely perfect for friend overlay material lol. Very fun, I mean it's the fifth house.

Me: Moon in 5th / 🐸: Moon in 9th

I know I know,,,,,,you're jealous,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, To just expand on that Big text: yes we have fun. We appreciate each other's existence. Sometimes we can put each other on a pedestal. I don't have to look into astrology to understand that we were meant to become friends to help each other, some things just don't need exploring to understand that lmao.

Me: Mars in 10th / 🐸: Mars in 7th

As I've stated before, I don't pick up much on 7th house energy so if you can notice anything I've stated that point to that feel free to let me know, but I'll be focusing more on the 10th (which might bring in some of the 7th tbh). When we were younger we used to work on projects together and I always got them to cosplay with me. It started off with just pokemon gijinkas, then evolved into complicated ones, and slowly we just cosplayed together from different series but her cosplays were always SO good. She was supposed to teach me how to sew but my attention span is.......Hm. So I'll learn when I get another sewing machine. The cosplay is just one example, but a good portion of my projects that were decently big usually involved her until recently (aka after I moved haha).

🐢Aspects

Alright, so we have a bunch of 8th house overlays and we're "clingy" water signs so how did that not blow up in our faces???

Well, starting with placements: I have an aquarius rising with a taurus moon. Both are fixed signs and generally pretty distant, even if one of them is better at putting up an act of being pleasant, they're still not going to make a bond with someone because when they make a connection they will commit. The house placements for all my inner planets are more "logical" and "distant" than "emotional" as well. For 🐸, they have scorpio & gemini placements, plus a sagittarius rising. With their house placements, I'm just repeating what I said up there. We have the same case going on. With that said:

My Sun Opposes 🐸's Uranus & Vice Versa

We both appreciate and value our own space and identity within a relationship, no matter what kind. Yes I spoke about spending all day together nearly all the time, but the thing that mattered to us is that as long as I still had my own values and opinions and 🐸 had hers, then that's fine. The second either of us started not being able to think for themselves we probably would've distanced ourselves. (sometimes hard aspects Can help)

My Moon Opposes 🐸's Moon

Yeah yeah, this is the funniest aspect to see in some of my friends honestly. This one is less obvious with us, but if you pay attention you will notice it. I will want to always go out and do things and travel or explore or just be Moving, whereas 🐸 will want to be home. 🐸 is much more of an outdoorsy person than I am by far, but it's just that they don't like the heat or Always being outside, whereas I am perfectly fine with that haha. So while my energy level might be at 100, theres would maybe be at 15. Or I would be willing to do something "just cause" and they would disagree because wheres the reason. Just little stuff like that.

(I promise one of these days I'll put a positive aspect in here but like....it's more interesting to write about harsh aspects)

So! That's that. You can expect another one of these in like two days because another best friend is having a birthday LMAO. THIS one was made in one day because I just decided to do it while at work so maybe I'll plan next time and write it out but I don't really have time like that so :) oh well. Love you!! You know who you are!!!

[urlocalbunny]

.ruined orgasm - ethan.

hi, babes! My posting rate went DOWN, i’m aware, but lots of things happened and the national exams are nearing my asscheeks, so please understand that i’m overwhelmed so the requests are stopped in time lmao

1.675 words, enjoy!

Ethan was moody, and everybody knew that much. Always slamming doors, yelling, frowning, laughing at people evilly, sometimes, even... Hissing? But Eloise still put up with a lot to make their relationship work.

And in the end, it did make a difference. Ethan would tell her where he went and with who, how his day was, sometimes he'd even get her food instead of sending Beliath to learn more about her favorite things! Even if she told him that he didn't need to justify himself because they were dating, he tried to show her he could be more than just a moody young vampire. He wanted to show her he could be reliable when it counted.

That's why Eloise had the stupid idea of trying to be reliable too and got herself sitting on his bed, listening to him talking trash about everything possible with his head laying on her lap.

"And he's such a dumbass. Did you see his hair this morning? He looks like a mop. Aaron takes care of him, and he doesn't learn anything, probably burnt all his brain cells trying to find out how much is two plus two. Ah, speaking of Aaron, can you believe he ditched Leandra again? That tomato head is fucking crazy! I mean, there isn't any competition anymore because you're way hotter and you're my girlfriend, can't he do something?-"

"You're acting like a 72-year-old grandpa who likes a gossip." She deadpanned, watching his face contort into a disgusted frown.

"What the fuck? You're so mean! Pet my head." She sighed, patting his head.

"What's happening to you? You're talking too fast."

"I need to vent!" He exclaimed.

"Oh, god. Look, let's calm down. You have to sit down." She patted the bed near her. Ethan was very fast, but she never saw him using his powers inside his room like that. He sat down anyway, but then he fidgeted. "Sit down." She said softly and straddled him harmlessly. He blushed.

"What are you doing?" He asked suspiciously.

"I'm just chilling with you. I'm not going to hurt you."

Sometimes, talking to Ethan was like trying to aid a hurt animal. He was in pain, scared, angry. That made him have very wary reactions. She was the first girlfriend he took seriously, after all. He wasn't the type to stay too much in one place.

"You're... Um- close." He mumbled, a little uncomfortable.

"It's okay then. We can sit side by side again. I'm sorry for pushing. I didn't realize I was too quick." She smiled, beginning to scoot over, but he held her by the waist.

"N-no. Stay like this. You're warm." He hid his red face in the crook of her neck, smelling the perfume Beliath bought for her on her birthday. Fitting.

"You're cold." She said, squealing lightly. "It's not overwhelming, though. You're chilly. I like it." His head felt very heavy. Her treatment of him was too much to handle.

"Are you alright?" She asked, quirking one cute and now messy eyebrow. He huffed, looking at her hesitantly before cupping her face on his hands and kissing her softly.

Her tiny smile on the kiss pushed Ethan further. His heart hammered like crazy. He couldn't help but squeeze her waist, making her open her mouth to moan softly. His tongue slid in slowly, licking hers tentatively, tenderly. She returned the caress, scratching the hair on the nape of his neck as a treat for his boldness. His kisses got eager and full of little appreciation noises as his hands groped her thighs roughly. Her hands got rid of his coat. Eloise tried to spare him a glance to see if she needed to stop, but he urged her back with an annoying whine, tasting her tongue again. The feeling was as if they kissed for the first time again. He wished he could stop, but her lips were so good. He wanted her to keep going even if he didn't know where.

"Eloise, I want to fuck you so bad." He whispered, pulling her hips against him. She matched his movements, combining with wandering hands, to keep him calm until the situation escalated. Her eyes took in his glazed over stare, his panting, and his now swollen red lips. A small white hair stripe ran from his belly button and lower, hiding on his pants.

"Kick off your shoes," she panted, pulling his shirt off. He did as she asked, kicking them off and pulling his socks with his feet. The sight of his flushed neck made her suck in a breath and lean in, kissing his skin eagerly. His hands found themselves on her thighs again, this time creating little red marks under his fingertips.

"You don't have to be shy, love." She whispered, making him scoff.

"You think I'm some virgin you can control?" His hands slid to her ass, squeezing it. The friction his zipper gave made her clench around nothing, whimpering louder than usual. His composure fell, a shy yet pleading stare taking place. Her fingertips ran along with his nipples, eliciting a violent shudder. His back arched nicely against her hand. Her hands worked slowly, appreciating him while his own hands kneaded her ass slowly. His stare fell on her breasts, the way the dress strap hung down still engrained on his mind. He kissed her neck, daring.

"You're so lovely." His whisper woke her up from a deep daze, her hands squeezing his waist ever so slightly.

"You're beautiful." Her answer was almost immediate. He was taken aback by such warmth. No one-night stand ever did him like this. That was already intimate. He was told he's beautiful before. Not like this. Not by her.

Pushing him on the bed and standing up to allow him to raise his hips, Eloise pulled his pants and trousers down. He blushed.

"You look pent up." She sighed, running a hand through the tip. His cock twitched.

"Why am I naked, and you're fully dressed?!"

"That, honey, is called dominance." She gripped the hem of her dress, pulling it up and planting a knee between his own, revealing her thong. He had imagined, and he'd definitely seen and felt her before, but that laid beyond his expectations. The adoration he felt broke the last of the boundaries he had. His shoulders relaxed. Raising his arms above his head and laying them on the bed, he thought that maybe surrendering once wasn't so bad.

"Open your legs for me, honey." He obeyed. Placing herself between them, she kissed him intensely. He couldn't help but pinch one of her nipples, earning a high-pitched moan from her... And his nipple pinched in return. "My, my, you look so clever taking advantage of our positions, don't you?" His hand dropped by his sides, back arching against her hand. She began to slide her nail against his stomach, gripping his cock with her hand and jerking him carefully.

His eyes fluttered shut, a peaceful expression dancing on his face as he whined lowly and pushed his hips in sync with her hand. She gripped harder, coating him on his precum. Her hand worked up and down, sometimes he felt her other hand cup his balls, and she occasionally sucked on his nipple, appreciating his body, but Ethan wasn't going to last.

"Eloise, please. I'm close. So close, I'll be so good to you, so, so good, just p-please-"

"Oops!" Her hand shot up just as Ethan was about to cum. His hips jerked upwards as he moaned helplessly and loudly, sobs erupting from his throat as he thrashed around, orgasm now ruined. The pain mixed with the full pleasure that could've been something else. Betrayal danced behind his eyes, his back arched and his hips thrusting up against nothing, tears dripping from his cheeks.

"Eloise!" He sobbed pathetically, reaching for her hand. "Elo-" he coughed.

"Shhhh, it's okay, you're still so hard." She cooed, running a hand on his stomach to soothe him.

"You ruined it- why?" He was shocked, making her chuckle.

"I couldn't resist, honey. Here, let me fix it."

"How are you going to fix- ahn-" he shut up quickly when her entrance engulfed his tip, swallowing him and bringing him into her soaked heat.

"Like this." She struggled to say, holding herself against his shuddering form and waiting for him to adjust to her. Ethan kept panting, but soon enough, he came around, starting to grind up frantically until he was balls deep within her, earning some approving moans from her. She coaxed him into turning them around, making Ethan cradle her head on his arms and thrust desperately, looking for release no matter what. His cock twitched, the sensitive tip rubbing against the sweet spot that had Eloise seeing stars. The girl arched her back, nearing her end when Ethan lifted one of her legs and held it, bruising the skin and creating a new angle.

"That's it. You're doing amazing." He moaned at that compliment, snapping his hips in a low mantra of "Eloise, I wanna cum," and the groans when she pulled on his hair.

Ethan started growling incoherent stuff, tears streaming down his cheeks. His face and neck were red, and he held a breath. Eloise keened, gripping on his arm as her walls spasmed around him. Her back arched, legs trembled. His head was spinning, white dots all over the place.

"Eloise, I-" he didn't have time to explain, a long whine taking place followed by a gasp as he came inside, hips still snapping, then stilling comfortably.

"Are you okay?" She asked, caressing his back. He looked at her with his bloodshot eyes.

"That was amazing." He panted, resting his head against her chest. "Can I dom next time?"

"Of course, baby." She said softly. Ethan smirked when Eloise gasped, and the slap he gave on her leg made a loud sound in the room.

"Ah, ah. The baby is you. Get on all fours. Now. You're paying for not giving me what I wanted.

[cattles-bians]

the damie vibecca exes au part 7

post directory

obsetress: i just. started thinking about little spoon viola and got

obsetress: rly emotional

em: yeah.....

obsetress: and then i thought

obsetress: yeah ok rebecca big spoon viola little spoon but then i was like

obsetress: dani big spoon viola little spoon

em: YEAH BABY

obsetress: and then i really hurt myself

obsetress: esp bc dani is canonically a big spoon

em: i’m tryna remember how tall bexs is but i cannot place it alas

em: dani canon big spoon

em: well! now i’m thinking abt it and now I’m emo

obsetress: google says tahirah is 5'4 so same more or less

obsetress: viola n her shorties

em: viola is nothing if not consistent

em: loves a routine

obsetress: another thing for her and jamie to bond over

obsetress: routine

obsetress: and dating the same women

obsetress: no literally the same women

em: jamies like um. before they leave for a trip jamie packs everything up and sits on the couch for 15 minutes to see if she’s forgotten anything

em: otherwise if danis checking everything they will get 30 minutes down the road and realise they forgot pants

em: dani can also be a little bit of a disaster as a treat

obsetress: as a treat!

em: it’s not her fault! she’s got a lot on her plate

obsetress: dani clayton: will remember the strap but forget their toothbrushes

obsetress: every time

em: bsgskdhdjdhdjgdksdjdhkdgdkshsjdhsjeg

em: dani: yeah but.. in my defence... you can buy toothbrushes everywhere... jamie: no but i really like those bristles

obsetress: jamie: spent two months wearin em down

obsetress: dani: you brush too hard anyway, jamie, really, just

em: breaking them in like boots

em: dani clenched fist clayton talking abt brushing teeth too intensely

em: i love them. i love these idiots

obsetress: god right

obsetress: they're Perfect

obsetress: you know who else is perfect

obsetress: dani big spoon clayton holding viola while she cries herself to sleep because the judge changed their custody agreement and now arthur's getting isabel on christmas day and and whispering in her ear that it's going to be okay and pressing soft kisses to the back of her neck and shoulders and––

obsetress: deranged. absolutely deranged

em: hannah

em: like it’s v good and emotionally rich and a big brain concept but i despise u for putting it out in the world

obsetress: i despite myself

obsetress: anyway um

obsetress: dani and viola do christmas together that year because it's not like dani has anyone either

obsetress: and then, y'know, viola's alone again (rip) and sits in her big apartment and drinks martinis and orders catered duck or some shit and watches it's a wonderful life and cries

obsetress: but then

obsetress: christmas miracle time something something all forces yield to time and a couple years later

obsetress: there's a new christmas tradition and dani and jamie and vi n becca all spend christmas together

em: ahhhhh i love that

em: my one quiet headcanon is. jewish dani so i flipflop between ‘dani alone on christmas angst potential found family aw nice’ vs like ‘dani wasn’t really doing anything anyway but it’s nice doing things w people u love :)

obsetress: oh i love that

em: anyway viola drinking alone on christmas and dani rocks up w a birthday cake that says happy birthday **jesus

em: & she’s like sorry i couldn’t uh. find any fruit cake lmao

obsetress: god yeah that's perf

obsetress: dani's like "i know it's not, uh, the same for... for a lot of reasons, but... i could... spend it with you? if you want?"

em: love that love viola and dani watching old movies on christmas

obsetress: dani's like "i don't know christmas, but i know judy garland"

em: maybe there’s a little absolute shit talking abt arthur but dani manages to steer it back when it gets Too heavy

em: knows when to push and when to lay off etc

obsetress: she's so good

em: also OT4 christmas parties sound absolutely bananas

obsetress: god yeah like

em: they’re ALL the lesbian aunts that down a bottle of vodka and ruin christmas lunch

obsetress: ok they get together for the last night of hanukkah to all celebrate with dani but it's usually very chill but then over christmas they just go apeshitt

obsetress: YEAH

obsetress: like

obsetress: viola's making her and bex heavy handed martinis and then dani and jamie are going ham on the eggnog

em: jamie goes nuts for hanukkah she’s like ur telling me there’s a holiday dedicated to fried food

em: count me in

obsetress: she's over the stove making latkes for dani every night she's so excited

obsetress: even tho she burns them 99% of the time

em: beautiful beautiful jamie

em: i’ve never tried eggnog

em: kinda want to try it but the idea of raw egg texture freaks me out

em: vegan eggnog

obsetress: v fair

obsetress: ngl i almost said, dani and jamie drunk on oat milk eggnog

em: love that

em: i am constantly flipping between trendy health food vegan lesbians dani and jamie vs like. well. the brits are well known for eating various grey meats

em: dani makes jamie do meat free mondays

obsetress: dani like

obsetress: ok jamie likes her grey meat too much

obsetress: dani is a midwestern boomer beef is basically a food group for her but

obsetress: although i guess they're not boomers in this au

obsetress: still midwestern still likes meat but

obsetress: she reads a lot of articles

obsetress: and she's very insistent about making meatless monday a regular staple of our week, jamie

em: like spiritually dani and jamie are the old soul boomers to the terrifying vibecca power lesbians

obsetress: so true

obsetress: but yeah midwesterners. eat a lot of meat

obsetress: esp the part of the midwest dani's from, it's all farmland basically

em: dani: we can try out new recipes jamie :) it’ll be fun :)

jamie: (british grumbling) cooking’s hard enough when i know what i’m cooking

dani: well. it is harder to get food poisoning from an undercooked vegetable

em: jamies like how was i supposed to know the sushi had been in the sun. it was an accident

em: what’s another midwestern staple i wanna know abt hmmmm

em: oh yeah what the fuck is puppy chow. like it’s in BHAH and i know google is right there but i kinda want to confirm it: even exists

obsetress: oh my GOD

obsetress: i ALSO have a dani clayton puppy chow hc i

obsetress: classic comedy of errors she loves it a lot and is always talking about it and jamie thinks it's actual dog food and then dani makes it one day and

obsetress: jamie sweet tooth taylor eats it all in one sitting

em: jamie sweet tooth taylor never had a chance

[irwinkitten]

feisty | a.i | part two

notes: so this was deff requested after i posted feisty about 8 months ago lmao i got sent an anon who literally astounded me with their idea and so working off that, part two started to get created and honestly i love it so much. however, as i posted the other day, it reached 16k and i was like “this isn’t even halfway done i need to stop and reevaluate this” so i’ve decided it’s gonna be three parts with part three already started.  request: Hi I was thinking ab Feisty (I’m the one who requested a pt 2) but like I was really thinking about it and I absolutely adore the way Cassie was written. She’s strong, she’s powerful, and she knows what she wants. She never turned her back on the idea of a pack and being part of one even tho she’s human. I was wondering if maybe you could incorporate the idea of her having a wolf, but that wolf is locked inside of her, but it slowly makes it way out in different ways. Like the idea she’s a 1/?  Like one day she’s getting extremely riled up and all of a sudden only her eyes shift and everyone around her is like “um the FUCK Luna???” And no one knows how she was able to do that but then maybe she finds some sort of ancient script ab humans among werewolves and they’re actually extremely powerful and something to be feared bc they’re sent to guide the pack and all of a sudden it makes sense bc Roxanne and Trixie are both extremely smart and intelligent and the other humans within 2/? The pack that have come around during her time also have the same intelligence and wisdom that the wolves tend to overlook and it look Cassie for the packs to understand and appreciate their power and it’s like up to her to continue to push forward and make sure that all packs respect the humans as if they were a wolf themselves but inside the humans is a wolf more powerful that they’re in tune with which is why they are able to lead the pack and point out the flaws in plans and makes them so 3/? Valuable to the packs in different forms and she’s out here being bad fucking ass and she won’t take no for an answer and she just has all this power and she knows she might just be a human in many of the wolves eyes forever but she’ll be damned if she doesn’t go down trying to change that bc no one, I repeat no one, should disrespect her or the others like her bc they are not less than the wolves and idk that might not be the way you were thinking of taking it but it’s just what I imagine 4/? Bc I think it would be really cool to see the other wolves reactions to her having some sort of power within her that’s untapped, along w the other humans and the backlash and rebellion that could ensue. Like how are these ~humans~ so powerful they’re just that, filthy, disgusting humans and I think that would be a really cool spin on it but that’s just me lol. Tbh it’s time to go reread feisty again and just revel in how well written Cassie is and how much I am DYING for a part 2 5/5 ALSO sorry I was just thinking that you could make Roxanne’s mate someone powerful as well, showing that even those who are tortured are destined for greatness warnings: mentions of murder, death, word count: 14.2k lmao am i ever gonna write a small one shot that’s an oc? probably not.

part one

donate to my ko-fi here 

-

The low alarm that keened throughout the small town of werewolves, it was one of both comfort and panic. The panic was of those who had been living on the edge, scared to step from the packs boarders without a warrior or two within distance or sight. 

The comfort resided within the Alpha and Luna, both who had planned and expected this to happen. 

There was a traitor.

The pair peeled themselves away from the bed, both fully focused on the fact that what they had seen, what had been pointed out to them had come to fruition.

“Luna?” A soft voice came from one of the rooms below theirs as they reached the next floor below, both dressed in similar attire, yet the Alpha’s attire was less restrictive than the Luna’s.

“You were right Trixie.” The soft tone of reassurance did nothing to stop the teenagers lip from wobbling. 

“So many are going to be hurt.” She whispered dejectedly as the Luna opened her arms out to the young girl. She stepped forwards into the embrace.

“Come, the elders will insist you are awake.” 

Nothing was spoken as the young woman and her charge continued further down, heading into the office that was located on the ground floor.

“Luna Cassidy, it’s about time.” The scathing tone of the Elder of Vinewood Pack reached her, Cassidy Irwin drew herself to her full height, meeting the Elder with a hard glare.

“Trixie Teller is the one who foresaw this. Need I remind you that she is but a child in all of this? They may be rogues but they are waging war, Elder Greydown. The knowledge of such a thing being right is distressing for any wolf, let alone a human teenager.” She snapped in return. The Elder scowled but did not refute her argument.

“Elder Greydown, I do not want to remind you, yet again to respect my Luna.” Cassidy watched as the Elder bowed to her mate.

“My apologies, Alpha Ashton.” Cassidy ignored the slight against her and bundled the trembling teenager into the spot between herself and her mate. Ashton did not hesitate to let his arm wrap around the teenagers shoulders, and she leaned gratefully into her Alpha’s comfort.

“Beta Hemmings has made contact with the warriors on patrol. They know not to engage, and survey the attempted attack.”

“Who knew of the council meeting?” Another Elder spoke up. It took a second before Cassidy realised it was Elder Maybanks.

“None outside this circle were told. Not even young Trixie knew of this.” Eyes fell on the form of the still shaking human teenager whose eyes were heavy and her body exhausted.

The silence of the alarm was deafening and the howl that followed in its wake was pain filled.

“They found the traitor.” Trixie whispered. Cassidy wanted to shield her from the pain, the dull reminder of her loss of Talon still serving her as a constant reminder of the failure that haunted her dreams.

“Should the human even be here?” Elder Greydown spoke, his tone condescending.

“You are coming very close to insulting someone under my protection, Elder Greydown.” Cassidy snapped. She received a scoff in return and Elder Maybanks exploded.

“You teach our pups to be tolerant, yet you cannot be tolerant of the two humans who have served our pack faithfully! It begs the question, what kind of tolerance are you filling the pups heads with in the first place?” 

Ashton held back the growl of frustration. He knew the Elder’s struggling attitude with the changes that Vinewood Pack had undergone. 

“Now is not the time.” Cassidy spoke, her tone stern and unrelenting. Elder Greydown huffed, but did not argue with her. She shared a look with Ashton and Elder Maybanks. They knew that they would be asking Greydown to step down before the week was out.

A sharp hiss escaped from Trixie before it turned into a whimper. 

“He’s hurt. Abel is hurt.” She got out as Cassidy held her face, forcing the teenager to look at her.

“You are here and safe. Alpha Irwin is tracking each of the warriors.” She knew better than to make the promise that he would return safely.

“His brothers are with him. He’ll be healed before he gets home.” Ashton reassured the teenager who gave into the tears. Cassidy understood. She allowed the teenager to cling to her in comfort as Ashton moved to his desk, tapping away at the laptop.

“Rosewood has confirmed that it’s Leo.” Ashton muttered and she sighed as Trixie finally relaxed against her. She carefully lay her down on the couch, tucking the blanket around her.

“How bad?” Cassidy finally asked once the teenagers breathing evened out.

“Sixteen wolves were injured. Two are serious, but the pack doctor with them has reassured me that they’ll be okay eventually.” Ashton murmured and his gaze returned to the two Elders in the room.

“We will require you at the offices by noon.” Both of them bowed to Ashton. Elder Maybanks bowed to Cassidy, Elder Greydown did not.

“If he wasn’t an Elder, I’d have Calum break his neck.” She muttered darkly once Ashton nodded that the two Elders had indeed returned home.

“He’s going to be retired from his position. Are your new teachers ready to take over the position?” She sighed.

“I think so. But there’s still some animosity between Roxanne and Gwen.” Ashton sighed.

“Gwen believes that Roxanne is the reason for her Aunt and Uncles’ demise and her cousins restriction, doesn’t she?” Cassidy nodded.

“Gwen is still openly hostile with her, and as much as I have tried to ingrain that Roxanne was the victim, she will see nothing of it. Personally, I’m close to pulling Gwen off the course and moving her to something that isn’t so potentially volatile.” Ashton nodded at his mates words, allowing her to talk freely.

Ever since they had returned so many years ago from his first visit to her old pack, she’d planned with various teachers about teaching the pups to practice tolerance and acceptance of humans within the pack. It became more so when more humans had been born.

Only a handful, but Ashton could see that each of them were gifted. Born years apart, the youngest only being just shy of a year old, and the oldest at the age of six already, Ashton knew that changes needed to be made and fast. 

The human girl they had rescued so long ago, Roxanne Teller, had been a significant trigger for the changes. Cassidy was determined that no child should suffer the fate that she had suffered.

Just shy of her twenty first birthday, Roxanne had been determined to do her adoptive parents proud. And she had excelled with Cassidy as her mentor.

Her younger sister, Trixie, was in a league of her own. Freshly turned fifteen year old was an extrodinaire with technology. Ashton had been the one to encourage that. But when she had turned thirteen, she’d been gifted with prophetic visions.

The Moon Goddess, Selene had appeared to both Trixie, and the Irwins, to explain the prophetic nature of the teenagers dreams.

They were dreams that could not be altered by choices or decisions. They were outcomes that the fates had decided themselves. Cassidy, was rightfully angry with her Goddess for placing such a burden onto the shoulders of someone so young.

“They will be prophecies of the years you will experience and the years you will never see. They are to guide my children into the rightful acceptance that you have started.” 

Cassidy knew she could not remain angry with the fates if they had deemed Trixie their host to record prophecies for years to come. 

Many had complained of Ashton taking both girls under his wing, but at the Alpha’s conference, both Ashton and her previous Alpha, Isaac Lockard told them of the successes that Cassidy had. 

That was the day the first laws began to change. Abuse of a human born or mated into a pack would be met with penalties and jail time. Anything that could be seen as an attempted murder will be met with either exile or execution.

Alpha’s grumbled about that until Cassidy stood up on the podium, her eyes sharp as she snatched a dagger from one of the security wolves belts and sliced her hand open like she did to her own pack.

Alpha’s watched in fascinated horror as her blood trailed down her hand, dripping onto the stage. 

She’d forcefully pointed out that any attack on a human could be considered attempted murder because there was no accelerated healing. 

The High Council has been quick to distinguish parameters of what was considered abuse and what was considered an attack.

It wasn’t a lot, but it had been a start for Cassidy.

===

Both were used to sleepless nights, and this one was no different. Ashton had his werewolf stamina to keep him going, Cassidy relied on caffeine to keep her afloat.

When Trixie stirred, she jolted awake in shock, a short gasp of hair escaping as black curls seemed to fly everywhere, wild eyes searching the room.

“It happened.” It wasn’t a question but Ashton nodded anyway.

“We had some injuries, but they’ll make a recovery. We found the traitor.” 

The tone in Ashton’s voice had dropped from reassuring to deadly in seconds, and Trixie couldn’t help herself as she shuddered. Part of her was grateful to her Luna that she demanded Trixie be kept away from any kind of interrogation. 

She didn’t want to be on the end of Alpha Ashton’s tone.

The shrill ring of the phone made the teenager jump in fright and Cassidy smiled as Ashton answered the phone.

“Morning Isaac.” 

Something was spoken for a second as Ashton placed the phone handle face down before hitting the speakerphone button.

“You’re on speaker now, Isaac. Trixie is with us.” 

The other Alpha did not need to be told the warning in Ashton’s tone. Keep it teenager friendly.

“Leo was injured last night. Hope nailed him good, however he was rescued by a wolf waiting on standby. It looks like there are a few traitors from packs within their cause.” Cassidy sighed.

“We managed to catch ours, or at least the only one we hope we have. What about your side?” Cassidy finally asked.

“Dead.” Came the blunt response and Trixie gasped.

“Isaac.” Cassidy snapped back as she took a hold of Trixie’s hands. “There was nothing you could do for them, sweet girl.”

“My apologies Miss Teller. Unfortunately, there would’ve been no saving this wolf. The rogues had clawed into their very minds and warped their entire views.” Trixie finally nodded before a blush crept up her skin. 

“It’s forgiven, Alpha Isaac.” She finally got out and Ashton smiled at her reassuringly. “If I can be excused? I know that Rox wanted to meet for breakfast and she’ll crucify me if I’m late.” Ashton nodded.

The excuse was weak, but she was still too young in Ashton’s eyes.

Once the door had closed, Cassidy moved herself to Ashton’s lap, his arms winding around her waist.

“Who was it, Isaac?” 

“Gregory Sampson.” Cassidy closed her eyes at that, her heart sinking at the fact the sweet boy she knew had turned traitor. 

“Who discovered him?” She felt Ashton’s hand on her hip, his thumb rubbing slow circles into her skin. 

“Kallie Tyson.” Came the amused response and Cassidy snorted. 

“What tipped her off?” 

“She was there the day Leo was exiled. Apparently he hadn’t bothered to dampen his scent and she smelled him all over Sampson. She’s been wary of a lot of wolves after the whole debacle years ago. When she realised the scent, she went to patrol and alerted them.” Isaac explained and she sighed. 

“Was Sampson executed immediately?” Ashton’s tone was a lot more calmer than the harsh tones he’d spoken earlier. 

“No. We got him for all the information that he was worth. I know that another two packs caught traitors, not including yours. Cassidy I’d say collate with the other strategists. Get the information any way possible and work through it.” A low sigh escaped her lips and Isaac paused. “Cassie?” 

She tried not to groan, she knew that when her old Alpha called her Cassie, it was his way of checking in with her as her surrogate family member and not her old Alpha. 

Before she could speak up, Ashton cut her off, giving her an apologetic glance. 

“Elder Greydown has been testing her patience. He’s been the one who has been teaching other pack Elders for tolerance with humans. However he borderline disrespects Cass in front of other Elders and pack members.”

Cassidy found she couldn’t be angry with Ashton as she laid her head on his shoulder, pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek to convey that she wasn’t mad at him. 

Isaac growled audibly. 

“I’m assuming that his position is about to become open to other Elders?” 

“Yes and no.” Cassidy answered calmly. “I’ve been training pack members to take over that role. However there’s been animosity between the two of them so I may ask for an outside Elder to come in and learn but then teach other packs.” 

“I’ll speak with Elder Orion. You know he forever asks after you.” Cassidy grinned. 

“That’s because I’m respectful to my elders, old timer.” She teased and Isaac barked out a laugh. 

“Alright trouble. Get in touch when you want to plan with the strategists. I’ll spread the word to the other packs.” 

“Appreciated Isaac.” Ashton muttered before the line went dead and Cassidy sighed. 

“How long do we have until we need to be at the offices?” This earned a tired groan from Ashton. 

“I don’t want to have to deal with Greydown’s disrespect. I’m hoping that the other Elders being there will reign him in but I’m not going to hold my breath. We need to start moving now if we want to get there on time.” 

Cassidy moves from her mates arms, but not before giving him a gentle kiss. He smiled in return before pushing himself up and the two headed to get changed from the black outfits they’d worn in preparation. 

Part of Cassidy was raging. Angry that rogues would make this attempt. Another part of her was filled with sorrow, knowing full well that there would be packs that would collapse from that kind of onslaught. 

By the time the two had reached the offices, her mind was whirling. She greeted the Elders that were gathered, unsurprised at the lack of respect from Greydown. 

It hit her. 

She kept her body relaxed, refusing to give away her realisation. She knew that the moment he was discovered, it would either cause more problems or give them their solutions. 

Taking Ashton’s hand in hers was always normal. Absentmindedly, she began to trace letters into his palm, making out soft patterns at each space so the game wouldn’t be given away. 

The Elders knew she was very touchy with her mate for good reason. They eventually got used to their Luna’s quirks, barely concealed amusement on their lips at the resigned look on their Alpha’s face when she threw herself into the architectural planning of new homes. 

Ashton understood her message, immediately switching to plan B. They’d concocted this plan when lay together, her mind frazzled with worry of a traitor being someone so close to them they’d never suspect it. 

“Greydown.” 

“Yes Alpha?”

“Tell me Greydown, why do you respect me but not my mate? And if you utter a word about her humanity, I’m sure she will take gleeful pleasure in throwing you from the window.” Ashton’s casual comment was met with a look of fear. 

He pinned the older man down with a dead stare, the mirth gone from his face. 

“She doesn’t know how to run a pack. And as your Luna, she still falls under your command yet flounces it regardless.” Both Irwins could see the hesitation. His words were just another dig at her humanity without outright saying the words. 

“Tell me Elder Greydown, I have ever disrespected your authority?” Cassidy started. Ashton leaned back with a smirk. 

“No, Luna.” 

“Have I ever been found lacking with my leadership, especially when I was appointed the Head of the strategists?” His smirk grew wider. Greydown became slightly flustered, his cheeks dark as he avoided looking at her. 

“No Luna.” 

“Look at me.” Her voice rang with the authority she held as the Alpha’s mate and Greydown’s head snapped up, staring at her in shock and awe. 

“Why do you believe that my humanity is a problem then? Everyone knows a wolf's mate is their ultimate weakness. Why is my humanity a deciding factor in that too? Or do you just hate humans on principle?” Greydown kept his lips pressed shut. “Answer me, Elder Greydown.” Her voice rang with the authority once more and he found himself unable to keep his mouth closed much longer. 

“They’re a disease that needs to be taken under control. We’ve had six runts born since you arrived and clearly it’s knowledge of a disease to spread to packs, to ruin the hierarchy.” 

Ashton’s smirk had fallen from his lips, standing from his chair as he stalked forward, closing the distance between the two. 

Cassidy didn’t even try to stop her mate. She’d learned fast he was a possessive mate at the best of times but anyone disrespecting her? 

She could only hope for Greydown that Ashton was in a kind mood. 

“Watch how you speak about my mate, Greydown.” The growl was low, a warning. 

Greydown scoffed in return. 

“I will speak of the human how I want. She wants to believe she’s Luna so badly.” 

The room froze at the Elders words, Ashton glancing back to his mate who had closed her eyes in rage and frustration. 

She paid no mind to the others as she rose from her seat, her eyes snapping open and glaring at Elder Greydown. She didn’t miss how his eyes widened and his cheeks drained of their colour. 

“You have no right to speak to me like that. Let alone the other humans in this pack who will outsmart you six ways to Sunday. You’re relieved of your duties of teaching tolerance. Tell me, would Leo Lockard treat this failure with the retribution he tried to give to me?” 

The shock turned to horror. He attempted to move but found himself being pinned down. 

“Sit still.” Cassidy snapped, her anger flooding dangerously. Greydown froze and didn’t move. 

“Get him out of here.” Ashton snapped to the two guards that had restrained Greydown. His attention turned to Cassidy. 

“Love, you need to calm down.”

“Why?” Ashton didn’t respond to her, merely pulling her to the mirror that sat in the office. 

She stared at herself in shock, fingers reaching up to touch her skin, her eyes focused on the amber coloured eyes that stared back in shock. 

Her gaze met Ashton’s as he pressed a kiss to her forehead. 

“We can ask around other Elders. They’ll have something we can work on, with what’s going on.” Cassidy found her voice lost as she looked back to the mirror, watching as the amber coloured eyes faded, leaving her bright green eyes confused and tired.

===

It’d been days since Greydown had been exposed as a traitor to the pack. Ashton had kept the techniques used quiet, but he relayed all the information that Greydown had given them. 

Part of Cassidy was screaming at her, telling her that something was off with the information.

“Ashton, I’m not saying that I don’t believe you-” The gentle smile from her mate as he cut her off relaxed her tense shoulders.

“-but it feels like something is wrong. I know sweetheart. But we’ve tried every tactic.” Ashton climbed into bed with her, her body automatically pressing against his as they fell into their positions easily. 

Sometimes Cassidy marvelled at the bond. Their first year together was almost purely physical, like they were trying to reconnect their souls. And she’d guessed that in a sense they were. But the smallest thing would set Ashton off, and vice versa. 

They learned what buttons could be pressed and what they needed to avoid. And after the first year, it calmed down so fast part of her wondered if it had just been a bizarre yet realistic dream. 

When it had come to nights, they could share the night easily, no hastily ripped off clothes or pushing their delights into the early hours of the morning. Some days Cassidy just enjoyed being held by her mate, and others she enjoyed the way he ravished her until the early break of dawn. 

Tonight was a night where she was content to lay in his arms, fingers trailing up and down her skin.

“Would you be willing to let me try?” Her question made him tense, but she was surprised he didn’t outright reject the idea immediately. This caused her to turn her head towards her mate who was wearing a contemplative look on his face.

“That wouldn’t be a bad idea. He wouldn’t expect you.” 

“And we can see if what happened the other day happens again. It looked like he couldn’t even fight my orders, although he must’ve tried.” Cassidy’s tone was convincing, hardly daring to believe that her mate was even considering this. 

“It’s one way of looking at it. But also, if he’s the only traitor to the pack, he’s the only one that knows about your eyes and the slight change. It means we have an avenue to look into that people may underestimate you for.” She could see that his mind was disappearing down various ideas. So she reached up and kissed him softly.

“We’ll keep considering my handsome mate. But both of us need rest, especially if I get to do this tomorrow.” The tease was delicate but Ashton could only grin. 

“As you wish, my love.” 

The following morning, Trixie was waiting for the couple at the breakfast bar. The majority of wolves that lived in the main pack house had either gone to school or work, or they’d be returning home from their shifts in the next few hours.

“Alpha.” Ashton took in Trixie’s exhausted state, her hands trembling but the determination set on her face intrigued him.

“Yes Miss Teller?” 

She’s following formalities, Cassidy mused as she remained at Ashton’s side.

“Selene came to me last night. She has instructed me to oversee the next three days.” Immediately Ashton tensed and Cassidy wondered if he was going to change his mind about her dealing with the traitor.

Then it dawned on her that the techniques he’d most probably used wouldn’t be good for a fifteen year old human to see.

“What were her exact words, Miss Teller?” Ashton’s response was calm, but Cassidy knew her mate better.

“Tell your Alpha that the next three days are crucial for you. A prophecy will be in play that you do not understand, but must follow through.” Ashton hummed as he took in her exhausted appearance.

“What happened in the dream, Trix?” Her body seemed to sag at the use of her name as tears flooded her face.

“It was Roxanne.” Dread filled Cassidy’s stomach.

“She was h-hurt so badly. But no one cared about her!” Ashton was quicker than Cassidy as he soothed the distressed teenager. “S-she was dying, in the middle of a road. They hurt her so much. Tied her to a kennel and left her in the wilderness.” Cassidy froze. 

“Sweetheart, what else happened?” 

“She was crying for our Luna, but they laughed. They-they-” She was sobbing into Ashton’s chest now, her words cut off from her sobbing but when the two mates shared a look, they knew exactly what she had seen.

Her nightmare had been a mixture of what had actually happened to her older sister with her own nightmare of Cassidy never answering the call she’d made as a child. Cassidy left her mate to comfort Trixie as she called Roxanne.

“Luna?” Her voice was groggy and tired.

After the prophetic dreams began, Rae Teller had requested that Trixie remain in the pack house, knowing that the urgency and frequency of these dreams would be too much for the teenager. It’d distressed both the sisters and parents when the move first happened and Trixie was struggling, feeling like her parents were rejecting her.

However Rae called her every night for a month and visited as often as her new job would allow. She’d rediscovered her talent in peacekeeping, and often went on envoys with her husband to attempt to settle various conflicts. 

Trixie then understood the need of her job and was the first to convince her parents to make the first trip when she was fourteen. Roxanne had already moved out of the pack house by that point but the sisters would meet for lunch before their respective school hours and work hours and almost always shared dinners together.

“You’re needed at the pack house today.” She responded softly.

“Is Trixie-”

“Your sister is fine. I’ll explain when you get here.” Cassidy cut her off calmly, knowing that she needed to be the voice of reason at this point.

Roxanne hated her past, she never opened up about it to anyone apart from the therapist that Ashton had convinced her to see not long before her eighteenth birthday. She’d resisted till she broke down in front of her Alpha. That was her turning point.

She’d never talked about the details to her parents, but they knew she’d been abused. However it had been some kind of unanimous agreement that Trixie would never learn of the horrors Roxanne suffered.

Their Goddess had taken the decision from their hands and shown her in her dreams in the worst way possible.

When Roxanne arrived, her hair dishevelled and clothes seemingly the first things she could pull on-sweatpants and a tank top-Cassidy intercepted her at the door.

“I need to tell you so it doesn’t shock you. Our Goddess came to Trixie last night.” Immediately Roxanne was wary, her dirty blonde hair falling in front of her eyes as she pulled it into a loose bun.

“Luna, what did she show her?” 

“There’s something that’s going to happen today, I’m going to see the traitor we caught,” Roxanne’s eyes widened, “she was told she needed to be with me as it happened. However, the Goddess emphasised her point by showing you.” 

“Me?”

“Specifically, what happened to you before I found you.” Cassidy watched as Roxanne took a step back, her face filled with shock followed by anger. Then resignment.

“It scared her, didn’t it?”

“She’s clinging to my mate sobbing her heart out, distressed because she saw you getting hurt. Apparently you called out for me and I never came.” That in itself was distressing for Cassidy, to turn her back on someone in need.

Roxanne didn’t hesitate to hug her Luna tightly.

“You came for me regardless. And you came for her too.” Cassidy felt slightly guilty, her own distress at the words eating her up. But Roxanne didn’t relent as she pulled away and looked towards the kitchen.

Cassidy needed no further encouragement as she led Roxanne to the kitchen to find that Ashton had sat on the bar stool, Trixie was sat cradled in his lap like a child. His voice was soothing, the sobbing having receded to gentle hiccups of noises as his fingers worked through her dishevelled jet black curls. 

All Cassidy could think at that moment was how good a father he would be when they were ready.

“Trix?” Roxanne’s voice was hesitant and Cassidy watched as the younger sister scrambled off Ashton’s lap, launching at her sister, the tears still streaming down her face.

“Alpha told me that it was real. Please, please tell me he’s lying.” Cassidy could feel the tears prick the corner of her eyes. Roxanne’s were falling down her cheek.

“Alpha wasn’t lying, baby. Before Luna saved me, those nasty people who had me, hurt me in the worst ways. But then Luna rescued me, and brought me to you, where momma was the first wolf to show an ounce of love towards me.” 

“R-rox.” the younger Teller’s voice trembled as she gasped her sisters name, but Roxanne shushed her, soothing her back curls with her hands as she pulled away to look her sister in the eyes.

“Then you came in, sat atop our Alpha’s shoulders and asked me to be your sister, that your warrior would protect us both and we’d have big brothers who are teddy bears.” Cassidy pressed her lips to stop the giggle at the description of Josh and Jacob. 

The twins had lived up to that description, both of them forming solid friendships with the girls as they got older. No other wolf dared to insult the girls, knowing that it would get back to the warriors and they’d be facing a pissed off Alpha.

“I was reborn that day because of you, Trixie. You, momma and pops gave me a new life that I wanted. Whatever our Goddess showed you was probably true, I was treated with cruelty and hatred. But I found love in abundance with you.” 

It wasn’t much longer till Trixie had calmed down enough to let her sister go, only to return to her Alpha and accept the hug that he offered her.

“I’m assuming our Goddess showed you that to show what could most likely happen. She’s done it before so we’ll follow her guidance for now. But any signal that you want out, just show and we’ll get you out of there, okay?” Trixie nodded against his shoulder before he moved and began to make breakfast.

Roxanne sat down, throwing a cheeky smirk to her Alpha.

“It’s not often you get an Alpha making breakfast for you Trix. Maybe I need to come by more often.” 

“You can make your own breakfast, ratbag.”

“Hey, I came over here at your mates request! I was lying in the most comfortable bed at the time.” Roxanne whined in return, earning a laugh from Ashton.

“I doubt your mate would appreciate you calling him a bed.” Roxanne snorted.

“He makes the bed worth the comfort, but he doesn’t match the comfort of that bed and he knows it.” Ashton laughed, Trixie’s own soft giggles joining in and Cassidy smiled as she realised their ploy. 

To make the teenager giggle. 

When they reached the pack offices, Trixie was a lot more relaxed. Roxanne had foregone this trip, not entirely comfortable with the idea of watching an interrogation.

Ashton didn’t begrudge her this, instead asked her to coordinate with the other Elder’s with Elder Maybanks. The Elder never questioned the change, knowing that the disrespect would never have gone unpunished in Ashton’s eyes.

Cassidy felt her nerves, knowing that pack eyes were on her whether they’d announced this or not. People looked to how she dealt with situations and this was another one.

Calum greeted them with ease, pulling Trixie into a bear hug which made her giggle. 

“Everything okay little bird?” His voice was quiet and she nodded her head, glancing at Ashton. He nodded it in return. 

“Selene came to me last night.” Calum raised a curious eyebrow at that. 

“She decided to show her something that involved her sister.” Cassidy’s voice was tight and Calum gave her a confused look before she shook her head subtly. 

He took the indication and moved the subject forward. 

“So that was what drew my mate from me first thing? Sounds fair. Didn’t think I’d see you here though, little bird.” The statement wasn’t laid with curiosity as the group finally moved, Trixie pulling away to move back to Cassidy’s side. 

“I was told to be here.” Was the only reply she could give. Ashton smiled at her before motioning to his Head Warrior to hold fire. 

Calum fell silent as they made their way through the offices, his stern glare making wolves pause in their approach. 

Abel held no such qualms when he realised who was with his Alpha. 

“You’re safe.” Trixie breathes before rushing to meet him, her arms going around his neck as she held him tightly. 

“I’m sorry. Jacob got to me quick enough so it’s only desk duty for a few days rather than weeks.” He murmured in return and she simply held him a little bit tighter. 

Cassidy watched with relief as he comforted her and she shared a small smile with both Ashton and Calum. 

Abel had been invaluable to the Tellers. After his discovery that Trixie was his mate, he made every effort to help them get Roxanne settled into what should’ve been a life that she should’ve experienced growing up. 

Trixie was kept in the dark about her mate until she moved into the pack house and finally understood that loving her best friend the way she did was okay because he was hers. 

When Ashton offered to allow Abel to stay in the pack house she shook her head almost immediately; to Ashton’s confusion and Cassidy’s amusement. 

“I-I don’t want that with him. Not yet.” Her voice was timid and Cassidy understood. 

Ashton wasn’t quite so understanding. 

“But he’s your mate?” Cassidy took pity on her own mate. 

“She’s not ready to explore that side of their relationship. He’s her best friend and she’s comfortable enough to admit that she loves him but this is new territory for her. Not to mention, I doubt she wants anything untoward happening under her Alpha’s roof.” Cassidy’s explanation had sent Trixie red as a tomato, her eyes unable to meet her Alpha or Luna’s gazes.

But she nodded.

Then the light-bulb clicked for Ashton and he pressed his lips to hold back a laugh. He knew that laughing at the young human would distress her. 

“Don’t be ashamed of your choice, Trixie. You know Abel will wait for you.” Ashton finally managed without choking on the words. 

She’d fled soon after and then Ashton had laughed at the fact that she was so mortified. 

But in that moment, the way her hands fluttered around his face-her eyes and hands searching for any visible injuries-it was painfully obvious how much she cared for him. 

“Abel, with us if you will?” Ashton instructed as the group began to move once more. Trixie was torn between her Luna and her mate and Cassidy simply came up to her other side so that she was sandwiched between them. 

Two more wolves followed behind whilst Ashton and Calum took the lead. 

The group remained silent until they reached the elevator, only daring to talk as they passed underground level. 

“Why is Trixie here, Alpha?” Abel finally asked and Cassidy just nodded at Ashton’s brief glance. 

“She’s here because we found the traitor. Elder Greydown. We’ve tried to get all the information, however we’re not sure to trust it so religiously. So my mate is going to take a crack at him. According to Selene, Trixie must be with her.” Abel felt his stomach jolt as they reached the lowest level. 

Cassidy took pity on the warrior wolf, his eyes darting to an oblivious Trixie. 

“She was shown what happened to her sister.” Calum blanched at that, his sharp gaze meeting Cassidy’s. 

“She didn’t.” He barely got out, his eyes flickering to Trixie who had seemed to hunch in on herself once she’d registered the conversation. 

The group reached the first offices available to them which in turn gave Calum a second to pull his own composure as he sat down with Trixie. 

“Have you spoken to Rox since the dream, little bird?” She nodded her head. “Do you understand what happened in the dream?” 

She hesitated. 

“I understand some of it. But not all of it.” She whispered and Calum wiped his hand down his face, a slow breath escaping him. 

“Calum, I do not need her distressed before the interview.” Ashton warned and Cassidy sighed. 

“She needs to understand it. As much as I hate the fact that Selene took the decision from all of us, she needs to understand the actions of those wolves and the consequences that followed.” Ashton frowned at his mate but did not contradict her as Calum leaned forward in his chair, elbows resting on his knees as his chin rested on his clasped hands. 

“Tell me what the Goddess showed you, little bird.” 

She described the dream in horrific detail, registering every mark and cut that had covered her sister's body in the dream. 

Abel had fallen into his stoic face, Cassidy belatedly realising he was there that day to see the aftermath. 

Calum was patient and wiped the tears that appeared on Trixie’s face as she described how both girls had been calling out for their Luna, but she never came. 

“I’m so sorry you had to witness that, little bird.” Calum murmured and she took in a shaky breath at his words. 

“Why did she show me that?” She finally whispered, the tears still in her eyes. Glancing to his Alpha, Calum rubbed his face with his hands before pulling away, a sigh escaping his lips. 

“Our goddess is showing you that we’re on the right path. That had Alpha Lockard not cared for our Luna like he did, she would’ve died. That the packs would’ve potentially fallen to rouges if this continues.” Cassidy felt her stomach twist as Ashton’s arm wrapped around her possessively. 

She couldn’t even find it in her to tell him to leave her be, because she knew on some level that hearing your mate might never have survived was difficult to hear. 

“Humans are at the centre of this. There’s something in play that we don’t know about yet, but Greydown knows something.” Ashton finally murmured and Calum nodded his head as they finally stood and made their way to the interrogation rooms. 

“If you need out, hit the door once. Twice if you need help.” Ashton murmured to Cassidy. She took a moment to see that he was genuinely worried, his eyes anxious and she placed her hand on his cheek, pressing a kiss to his lips. 

“We’ll be cautious.” She murmured, knowing it was entirely pointless but she needed him to know that the thought was there. 

Greydown openly smirked when they both entered the room, his arms bound behind his back, legs shackled to the chair he was sitting on. 

“The big bad Alpha decided to send the humans? Ha. That boy was never an alpha. He wanted to so desperately believe but letting humans do a wolf's work? Pathetic.” Cassidy kept silent, her eyebrow lifting up being the only indication that she was listening. 

This unnerved Greydown as Trixie followed her Luna’s example and kept her face impassive. 

‘Don’t say a word. He’ll crumble.’ A voice whispered to the young human. She gave no indication, no acknowledgement. Simply stared at Greydown. 

“Humans have been a bane to all the packs, to the lives we lead. Why should they be the ones who don’t have to hide?” 

Silence was his only answer once more. 

“Infections. The old prophets believed humans to be some kind of saviours of the packs. You’re nothing but thorns in our sides.” Cassidy moved. 

“You believed words of a prophet?” Her tone was empty, and Greydown sneered. 

“They were heralded as truth for centuries. But no humans were born to packs until now. Their words are nought but lies and desperation.” Trixie hid her smirk. 

“Why were they lies and desperation?” Cassidy kept her tone impassive once more and Greydown scoffed before spitting at her. Trixie stiffened, the disrespect sending something akin to fury down her spine. 

“The human born to wolves of lore, will hold the knowledge of Alphas unsure. To train and love and win the days, the wolves must seek their human mates. The one who shows the righteous path, will guide the Alpha to their new start. The prophet, the hurt, the broken and bent, will bring new times of peace and death. The dead reborn shall hold the keys, to start anew with the springtime breeze. The lonely wolf with no chance to escape, shall tear one from life to meet their fate. The humans born to wolves of lore, will lead the packs to glory and more.” The words were intoned, emotionless as another scoff followed. 

Cassidy shared a look with Trixie. 

“You will tell me how much Leo knows of this.” There was a firm edge to her voice and Trixie witnessed her Luna’s eyes flash amber. 

“Leo knows nothing of the prophecy. He refused to believe in something that would, in his eyes, be wrong.” Greydown responded before his eyes widened and his lips clamped shut. 

“Tell me what you know of what is happening to me.” Trixie felt a tingle run down her spine. Something in her was begging to submit to her Luna. Something she’d never felt before. 

Greydown’s lips parted despite his obvious attempts to keep them shut. 

“There were prophecies, that depicted the human born to wolves would possess the wolf. The human would have control of the wolf inside but there would be no change, no transformation. It would mark the start of an era that would either succeed or collapse. The prophet never said.” 

Greydown’s words were forced, reluctant. But Cassidy paid him no mind as she turned her attention to Trixie. 

Cassidy watched as Trixie stiffened, her eyes rolling back into her head as she let out a harsh breath. Her first instinct was to reach out but Greydown twitched and she froze. 

“The traitors are gone, the cause is done but the wolf that roams alone will continue. The wolf that was denied will fight and the wolf that has sprung forth will thrive. The traitors are gone and the cause is done.” 

Greydown stared at Trixie in shock as her head tilted forward, her eyes refocusing before her knees gave out. 

The door burst open, Calum and Ashton storming in. Calum went to Trixie, scooping up the teenager with ease whilst Ashton wasted no time in knocking Greydown out before his attention returned to Cassidy. 

“It’s answered a lot of questions. We’ll need to go to the Elders to learn more about this prophecy.” She nodded, but her focus was on Trixie who had taken in a startled breath. 

“I’ve got you little bird. Abel is waiting for you.” Calum’s voice was gentle as they reached the meeting room they were previously in and Abel wasted no time in getting to his feet, cradling his mate so gently as she trembled. 

“That was scary.” She finally whispered, her eyes finding her Luna who was pressed against her mate, relaxing to his touch as his fingers massaged her temples. 

“It means you’re a strong prophet little bird. And we need to talk to the elders sooner rather than later.” Calum piped up and Cassidy sighed. 

“There’s a lot we need to discuss with them. And maybe we can get this worked out before Leo decides to try his hand at another ambush.” Cassidy muttered as she sent Trixie a reassuring smile, leaning into Ashton’s touch. 

===

When the Elders met, Cassidy brightened upon seeing Elder Orion. And despite her ingrained sense of respect, the second he opened his arms in greeting, she allowed the comfort of her previous elder wash over her. 

“You truly have thrived, Luna. Your father and old Alpha pass on their wishes.” She found herself smiling at him before greeting the other elders. 

“Luna Cassidy, what happened after we dispersed?” Elder Maybanks went straight to it once they were sat down. She sat protectively next to Trixie, her mate on the other side. 

Abel realised there was more to the situation and remained silent as he comforted his mate, knowing she needed that more than anything. 

“A lot of things have happened, Elder Maybanks. Our Alpha has been interrogating the traitor, when Selene came to young Trixie once more. She was shown what happened to her sister upon a decision that was made to use the new skills I’ve acquired,” she hesitated but Elder Maybanks nodded, “he told us about the prophecies.” 

Elder Orion's gaze sharpened at her words and Elder Maybanks sighed. 

“What else happened, Child?” Cassidy found herself hesitating, glancing at Trixie. The young girl took in a deep breath, her shoulders determined, but her hands trembled. 

“I gave a prophecy.” 

The Elders froze. 

“Are you sure?” Elder Maybanks words were sharp, a steely glint in his eyes. 

“I saw it with my own eyes, as did Head Warrior Hood. She’s a true prophet and a strong one.” Ashton cut in before Cassidy could snap. She bristled at the silent accusations of deceit from the Elder but Ashton had stopped her from putting her foot in it. 

The worried looks shared between the Elders caused the Alpha and Luna to exchange worried looks. If this was concerning the Elders, what was happening? 

“This changes a lot of things.” Elder Orion muttered as he leaned back in his chair. “Luna Cassidy, do you remember what I taught you about prophets?” 

Cassidy could feel every set of eyes on her, and she determinedly ignored the look of shock from Elder Maybanks as she tried to remember what Elder Orion was discussing.

“I remember when you taught me about the witch trials, how packs were found by hunters who were seeking out witches and razed towns to the ground, no man, woman or child surviving. You mentioned something about prophets being saved by other packs but I don’t remember much else.” He nodded his head, turning to the other wolves in the room.

“Whilst Cassidy was growing up, Alpha Lockard assumed that she may have been a prophet. Not to say that she wasn’t extremely clever in her own right, but she seemed to predict the wrong moves that were made. We later realised that she had a strategic mind, a mind that calculated every potential move. There’s not been a prophet within the packs since the 1700’s. After the witch trials, they simply vanished.” Elder Orion explained.

This caused an alarm for Trixie, her grip on her mates hand getting tighter.

Elder Orion noticed immediately and smiled kindly to the distressed teenager.

“It is simply believed that prophets moved packs and never spoke about their gifts. We have always watched out for potential prophets in the more recent years, but in my own living history, I’ve never seen or heard of a prophet until you, Miss Teller.” This did little to soothe her, but Cassidy placed her arm around Trixie in comfort.

“Why is any of this important?” Calum finally asked, his eyes flickering between his mates little sister and Elder Orion.

“Because if Selene has truly gifted her as a true prophet, it will change the tide with the rogues. But also she will be sought out by many other packs, determined to bind her to their pack with a mate of their choice.” 

Those very words were the wrong ones to say. 

Abel growled lowly, the noise startling Trixie as his own body seemed to fight the transformation, amber coloured eyes glowing.

Cassidy felt her stomach swoop before Ashton stepped in.

“Abel, if you shift, you will hurt her. I’m ordering you to calm down.” The power of the command was heavy, his eyes falling shut as he went to move his arms around Trixie, but he froze.

Without any prompting, the teenager moved so that she was sitting on his lap, allowing him to pull her closer, his face pressing into her hair as he took in slow, steady breaths.

“I think that answers that.” Ashton muttered and Cassidy just felt the absurdity of the comment hit her, a giggle breaking through her lips before she was laughing, her head resting on Ashton’s shoulder.

“I think Luna has lost the plot.” A soft whisper came from beside her and she found herself struggling for air as she shook her head.

“I haven’t lost the plot. Just my mates comment, and the whole absurd idea that Abel would even let anyone near Trixie if she were in danger.” The teenager understood her Luna's words immediately and the two shared grins.

Ashton merely rolled his eyes at his own mate fondly, a soft smile on his lips before his attention turned back to the elders. 

“Is there anything we can do for now?” 

Elder Orion shook his head.

“The best thing we can do is protect her secret. Greydown will have to die regardless of his knowledge. He heard her prophecy.” This sobered the room up immediately, Trixie’s smile fading as she realised the implications.

“Is that because of me?” The question was timid and Elder Orion paused, his gaze turning to Cassidy and Ashton who turned their attention to the timid teenager.

“He was a traitor to the pack regardless of him hearing your prophecy. Traitors to the pack have two options. Exile or death. Greydown knows too much to be allowed exile.” Ashton explained softly and she sighed, a small nod following seconds later.

“I understand.” Cassidy could see that she did understand, and grimaced slightly, but there was nothing she could do.

“We also need to discuss what happened to Cass. Her eyes turned amber when she interrogated Greydown when she realised he was the traitor. Do you have any ideas?” 

The two Elders shared a look before Maybanks spoke up this time.

“There is something, Greydown wasn’t wrong when he said that Elder’s across the globe believed that prophecy to ring true. We need to get full facts from some contacts. When we know more, we’ll sit down with you, if that’s okay Luna?” 

Cassidy nodded her head.

“That works for me Elder Maybanks. It’ll give us a chance to deal with the consequences of today before we look into my own changes.” The two Elders nodded before the group dispersed and they went back to the main offices.

“Abel, finish up today and then take the next couple of days off. It’ll help your healing so long as you do nothing strenuous, so no weights and no shifting.” Calum finally muttered and Trixie stared at him in shock before turning to her mate.

Abel seemed to break into relief, his lips curving into a gentle smile. He knew a gift was being given to him at this moment and he decided to take it.

“Thank you Warrior Hood. I’ll be sure all paperwork is done and then take my leave.” He pressed a kiss to Trixie’s temple before making his way back to the small cubicle that was his whilst the rest of the group headed out of the pack offices.

“I’ll take Trixie back home.” Casidy hummed and Ashton nodded, his lips meeting hers in a short, sweet kiss.

“I’ll handle the problem. If there are any issues, I’ll call. Drive safe.” And with those words, they disappeared back into the pack offices and her gut knew what was going to happen. But she ignored those thoughts. Greydown was beyond saving, so it would be a mercy. 

The ride back home was silent.

When they returned home, Trixie disappeared into her room, causing Cassidy to sigh before she made her way to her office.

It was one thing she was insistent on when her move to the pack became permanent. 

She knew that Ashton had nothing to hide from her, and he knew that she had nothing to hide from him. However they both realised that being up in each others space wasn’t going to help either of them. 

So she convinced Michael to stay on as strategist, however he then convinced the Elder’s to make her appointment not only official, but put her up there with the other Alpha’s. Within three years of moving to Vinewood, she was appointed the Head Strategist for all of the continents packs. 

She accepted the title with grace in public, but within the confines of Ashton’s office, she voiced her ways of brutally murdering Michael as payback for putting this on her shoulders.

However, she shone as she went from strength to strength and that was when both her and Ashton decided to install an office for her and her alone. It meant that any confidential information would remain as so, but also it gave her the space that was not only hers, but also showed her hard work and the results of that hard work.

Once ensconced within her office, she contacted the other packs that had been attacked, gathering the information about the traitors and anything they had in common. That was what they needed to discover before Leo twisted his claws into more wolves. 

It was easy to work in the silence, tapping away at her computer as she emailed back and forth with a few of the other pack strategists. 

It was only when a gentle knock on her door made her pause, tearing her eyes away from the computer.

“Come in.” 

There was a second of hesitation before the door opened to reveal a red eyed Trixie Teller and she felt her heart going out to the teenager.

“Sit down sweetheart.” Her tone was reassuring and gentle, coaxing the young girl to try to relax.

Once the door was shut and Trixie was seated, Cassidy studied her for a moment before she resumed typing away, knowing that the young girl would speak when she was ready.

She’d been dealt with a lot of knowledge, some of that being the death of a pack member because they heard her prophecy. It was a lot for anyone to take in, let alone a teenager.

The silence seemed to stretch on for longer than Cassidy had expected, but she’d glanced over a few times to make sure she was still there. 

She was, but her eyes were glued to the floor, not even glancing up.

So Cassidy stopped, switching off her monitor and resting her hands on her desk.

“Talk to me sweetheart.” And finally, Trixie looked up, a frown upon her features.

“Today has been a lot.” The statement was simple, but it spoke volumes for Cassidy.

“It has. What do you want to talk about first?” 

“Elder Greydown, well I guess he isn’t an elder anymore, but still. Why would Alpha kill him instead of exiling him? Even if he didn’t know of the prophecy?” The question was a good one, and Cassidy had been expecting it.

“You see, Greydown had continually disrespected me as Luna since day one. This has been six years of abuse that’s been building up. However, he committed treason against the pack. He willingly put young wolves in danger because he believed us to be diseased.” 

She watched as Trixie’s face dropped.

“You wanted to redeem him, didn’t you?” The question wasn’t accusatory, and one look upon Cassidy’s face helped Trixie understand that. So she nodded.

“I didn’t want to think he was that bad that he deserved death over exile.” She finally whispered and Cassidy sighed once she realised that they’d stumbled onto the crux of the matter.

“It’s nice to try and see the best in people, trust me I did that for years. It was how I met my best friend. But sometimes, people just don’t have any good qualities in them. Greydown was one of those wolves who refused to see silver linings. He did not teach tolerance to the pack pups like he was meant to, he could have knowingly sabotaged that ambush that resulted in Abel getting hurt.” 

She hated using Trixie’s mate as a point, but she needed the teenager to know that he’d arranged for it to happen in such a way. Mates were sacred, and had he succeeded in killing Abel, she would’ve been a shell of a person, either choosing to live like her sister had done and pray for a second chance mate, or follow after him.

And Cassidy was certain that she would’ve chosen to follow after him.

“He’s the reason why Abel got hurt?” There was a steely glint in her eyes, her jaw clenching and Cassidy hesitantly nodded her head.

“Ashton uncovered his treachery. It’s another reason why exile was not possible. He actively worked against the pack that nearly resulted in a death. The last time that happened in any pack and they chose exile, it led to the rogue issue that we have currently.” 

“Leo?” Cassidy nodded. “What happened?” 

And so the two sat there as Cassidy told her stories of her best friend, of how he had put faith in her plans but Leo-the jealous son of the Alpha who favored her-sabotaged her plans, therefore worked against the pack that resulted in Talon’s death.

Trixie remained stunned as she heard this tale for the first time, her unease slowly slipping away as she found herself engrossed in the story that her Luna was telling her.

By the time that Ashton had returned home, both girls had migrated down to the kitchen, choosing to cook a small meal together as Cassidy told Trixie tales of her childhood. 

And despite how the day had gone, the heaviness that weighed on his chest, seeing the two of them giggling together over something that his mate had done when she was a child, it lifted Ashton’s soul from the floor back to the heavens where she’d first lifted it when he met her.

Trixie greeted her Alpha with ease, despite knowing what he had done, she realised that this was simply consequences of an action that nearly killed her mate. 

“Alpha. Did you get a chance to eat today?” Cassidy smirked at the jet black haired teenager, Ashton shaking his head at his apparent new keeper.

“Not today little miss. There was plenty of deskwork with the field work that we had today, so not much was consumed food wise. I’ve certainly had my fair share of caffeine though.

This made Cassidy giggle.

“My mate seems to drink coffee like it’s water.” The look of disgust that Trixie gave her Alpha made Ashton smirk.

“When you have to patrol so many nights in a row whilst still remaining upright in the middle of the day, coffee would be your best friend too. I know that Calum is just as addicted and drives your sister up the wall with it.” His arms wrapped around Cassidy as he pressed a kiss to her cheek in greeting. 

Trixie snorted.

“Yeah well, she likes the stuff too. It’s no surprise that they’re mates really.” Ashton laughed at her statement and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

“Don’t let her catch you saying that otherwise she might skin you alive.” He teased her playfully as she finished up the meal, elbowing his stomach as she moved to get some dishes.

This was what Cassidy loved. It was simplicity at its finest but also it was Ashton teaching Trixie to stand up for herself. If she could stand up for herself against her Alpha, then the world had no chance.

“Yeah well, she’d skin you alive first so I’ll just hide with my Luna under the nice, new, wolf skin rug that we’d end up acquiring thanks to my sister.” This set Cassidy off as they finally sat down to eat and she noticed that the dark cloud that hung over her mate had slowly disappeared.

“Brave words, tiny one. How about you and me do some training this week?” Her eyes lit up as a grin stretched across her face.

“Absolutely. Do you think we could include Abel this time so that he knows that I can protect myself? I know he’s my mate and he’s always going to worry, but I just want him to worry less.” She explained in a rush, Ashton nodding to her request.

“It shouldn’t be too difficult. But we’ll get Cass involved so she can sit on him to stop him from shifting and protecting you from me. Sound fair?” She nodded at his words as they dug into the meal and a feeling of peace settled over the trio.

Cassidy knew better than to think that this would last, but she was going to enjoy it whilst she could.

===

The first training session had been a disaster. 

Abel hadn’t known what to expect, and watching his Alpha phase and launch at his mate was not on his list. Cassidy hasn’t had a chance to stop him before he shifted and crouched in front of Trixie. 

It took Abel more time to come down from that bout of anger, but they left the session at that and Abel had kept his silence. 

The next session was better. He was able to stop his initial reaction, especially after a firm talking to from his Luna, he watched. 

And even though her techniques needed refining, he could see how she handled herself. That was when he began to understand why she wanted him to see her train. 

Cassidy stepped in from time to time as well, showing the teenager some of her own moves. Ashton stepped back when this happened and Abel began to understand why his Alpha only had mild concerns for his mates safety. 

She was a badass.

By the end of the session, Abel was relaxed in the knowledge that should anything happen, she could take care of herself. 

“Why not make something like this mandatory for all of the humans in the pack, Luna?” Abel questioned as the quartet headed inside. They would grab some food before the two males would head back out to the pack office buildings.

“Because they’re children. They rely on adults to protect them.” 

“And Trixie doesn’t?” Cassidy smiled at him.

“No. I don’t think she’s really relied on anyone since that day six years ago. It may seem simple to you Abel, but human children are so fragile compared to a young wolf. We’ve got a couple of the older ones in a self defence class, anymore at this point would be too much. When they hit thirteen, they’ll come to me and I’ll start teaching them then.” 

“Two styles to switch it up, then?” And Trixie grumbled as Cassidy grinned.

“Someone in the pack who uses their brains.” This earned her a confused look and Trixie sighed.

“Luna had to practically spell it out to us why we were in self defence classes as well as training with her.” The way her cheeks turned pink had Abel grinning as he squeezed her hand gently.

“I have a step up since I’m one of the warriors. I can guarantee you other wolves would not think of it that way.” Ashton glanced at his watch and sighed.

“Practice with Cass, T-bird.” The teenager grimaced at the nickname as she ducked from the hair ruffle that her alpha bestowed on her as he walked past to kiss his mate.

Her own mate laughed before doing the same thing and kissing her forehead before he got up and headed out, Ashton following seconds later. Trixie hid her face in her arms, her hair a mess thanks to the two men.

“Stupid Alpha and stupid mate messing up my hair.” The grumble had been loud enough for Cassidy to hear, earning a round of laughter.

“C’mon, I’ve still got some time before I’m expecting a call. How about we take a look at your English papers.” The groan that followed from Trixie made Cass laugh as she all but frog marched the teenager upstairs to her office

Barely fifteen minutes in and her phone goes off, earning a curious look from Trixie as Cassidy picked up the call.

“Luna Irwin of the Vinewood pack. Who am I speaking with?” 

“Cassie, thank god.” The relief in Issac’s tone caught her off guard.

“Two seconds.” She tilted the mouthpiece away as she looked to Trixie. “Would you mind finishing off downstairs? I’ll join you when I’m off.” The teenager didn’t argue as she gathered her things and shut the door behind her as she left.

“Cassie it’s been mayhem.” 

“Issac slow down please, what’s happened?” 

“There’s another traitor in the pack. But they killed a human child.” Her heart stopped at his words.

“Who?” 

“That’s just it. We don’t know. I was sent an email, and god Cassie it’s gruesome. I thought it was a wolf at first because the kids' eyes were amber, but when we checked the registry and the young boy that was murdered was definitely human.”

“Fuck.” The whisper might as well have been a scream. “It’s been happening to me, the amber eyes thing. The Elders believe it’s a prophecy in play. Fuck.”

“I’ll forward it to you, but it’s brutal.” And with that, she opened up her computer, clicking through until the video uploaded to her screen.

And as she watched, she felt sick. Tears burned her eyes as she tried not to cry out, but when the final blow was delivered, she couldn’t stop herself.

Issac had stayed on the line for her, his steady breathing being the only thing that stopped the panic attack overwhelming her.

“I need to contact Ash, fuck, Issac this is big. The Elders are going to get involved.” Her brain was going miles a minute. “Have you found the little boy yet?” 

“There’s a team working on it now. We’ve already been in touch with their parents. It was Demela’s and Mason’s youngest lad. Joseph.” And she felt her body lurch uncomfortably. 

“Issac.” His name came out as a sob.

“I know.” He soothed. 

Joseph had been one of the four children born into her old pack after she left. He came from a family with six older brothers who doted on him regardless of his status as a human. The first time she’d visited and she’d been introduced to the family, she’d clicked instantly. It had also been the first time that she’d really considered having a child. 

“I need Ash. He needs to know.” Part of her felt disengaged and heartbroken, the other part of her was planning out how she’d skin the traitor for this.

“With the state of distress, I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s on his way.” 

Issac’s words rang true when there was a firm knock at the door before it opened.

“Cass? Baby?” His frantic eyes searched for whatever was causing her this kind of pain. But she couldn’t get her words to work, only pointing at the video that was still open on her computer.

Issac spoke up.

“It’s something you need to watch, Alpha Irwin.” 

Ashton realised immediately that if something could make his mate this distressed, then it was a bad thing.

And so he clicked play.

Cassidy tried to block out the noise, the images. But she couldn’t. Her heart broke all over again. But she could feel her mates anger through the bond. Anger that was mounting into fury and she grasped his bicep.

“We can’t leave this. We need to find the traitor.” Her words were quiet but determined. Ashton nodded once, his jaw set.

“We’re flying out to you, Issac. Expect us by nightfall with the Elders.” The decision was firm and Cassidy immediately moved and headed to their room to pack a few bags. 

“Trixie will need to come with us.” Ashton’s words made her jump in fright, her hands trembling as she continued to fold the clothes up before packing them.

“She cannot see that video. And so help me goddess if Selene decides to take that decision from our hands because I will march up to her fucking door and demand judgement.” Her tone was harsh, but Ashton could hear her fear, her pain under the words. “He was a child.”

And her composure slipped into tears, Ashton pulling his mate closer as he pressed a kiss to her temple.

“We’ll explain in basic terms to Trixie. We will warn her that should Selene take the choice out of our hands, it is gruesome. I need to call an emergency meeting. We need to get a warning to the families as well.” Ashton rattled off and Cassidy took in a deep breath.

“Calum, Luke and Michael need to see this. They need to prepare.” Ashton nodded at her words as he pressed a gentle kiss to her lips.

“Finish packing, I’ll go talk to Trixie.” She didn’t argue as he left the room. She knew that there was no way that she’d have been able to even describe what happened.

By the time that the trio had packed and gotten to the offices, Ashton instructed Trixie to stay with Abel until they left. He didn’t miss the frown, but Cassidy simply gave her a reassuring smile.

“Protocols need to be followed, Trix. Twenty minutes tops and then we’re heading for the airport.” Trixie nodded at Cassidy’s words and turned her attention to her mate, the two of them quietly discussing her latest pet project with an old computer.

When the Irwin’s reached the conference room, she fought down the need to be sick as Ashton played the video for the other three as well as the remaining Elders. Their reactions were ones of horror, but it was Elder Orion who had tears down his cheeks.

“Little Joseph, Demela and Mason’s youngest, correct?” He whispered and Cassidy nodded as she tried to wipe her tears away once more.

“Issac is searching for-for the place. He’s contacted the family. This was a brutal attack but it also means that there are potential traitors we don’t know about. Sleeper cells, if you will.” Calum nodded at her terminology.

“We’ll talk to the other families which have human children and see if we can convince them to the pack house. It’ll be easier to defend rather than trying to split our forces seven ways to protect the land.” Ashton nodded at Calum’s immediate response.

“Every wolf we have available has to be on this. Four teams on rotation for the pack house and double the patrol on the borders. No one gets in or out of the pack lands. Trespassers are to be captured and interrogated immediately, any violence is to be met with full force.” Calum nodded at his Alpha’s orders. 

“Michael.” Cassidy’s voice was softer, but caught the blonde’s attention.

“Yes Luna?”

“I’m going to be coordinating with other packs on this. See if there have been any-any other murders.” She stumbled over the words and he nodded his head in understanding. “Also I’m going to place you in as my second in command. If any other strategists get in touch, they’ll be redirected to you. As of right now, I will be uncontactable until further notice.” 

“Has it been approved?” His eyes glanced to Elder Maybanks who nodded in return.

“We cleared it last week. It was intended to be a surprise for you, but as you can see that’s had to change immediately.” Cassidy held back a snort.

“Luke, it’s basic day to day running as possible.If anyone asks, there’s been a credible threat with another pack that needs to be dealt with. Shutdown pack lines until we return home.” Luke nodded at that before Ashton returned his attention to Calum.

“Trixie will be coming with us. She’s already told her sister she has to go but not why. You need to make sure she doesn’t follow us. It’s going to be tough enough with the devastation from my Luna.” Calum nodded once more as he let out a breath of air. 

Ashton and Cassidy were gone once it was confirmed that everything had been set in place.

They collected Trixie from Abel who looked unsure and the trio were up in the air quick enough. It wasn’t unusual for packs to have access to small airports, most preferred to travel by car or by shifting. But this wasn’t an option and it was the fastest way for them to get there without causing widespread panic. 

Matthew was there to greet them and didn’t hesitate to pull his daughter into a warm hug as Ashton helped Trixie off the plane. 

He greeted her with the same amount of ease and Ashton a firm handshake before they were bundled into the car and off again. 

“Who else knows?” Ashton’s question was quiet but Matthew shook his head. 

“The trees have ears.” Was all he replied with, causing Ashton and Cassidy to exchange alarmed looks. Nothing else was spoken about as they made their journey to the pack offices. It spoke volumes of the tragedy that had happened because there was no one else greeting them when they arrived.

They entered the building without being looked at twice. Cassidy stopped herself from going over to Demela and Mason when she spotted them. The couple looked exhausted and their children looked equally tired. 

When they reached Issac’s office, Trixie had shrunk into Cassidy’s side, the intimidating and unfamiliar wolves unnerving her. Cassidy was briefly reminded of Hope as her dad knocked on the door before letting them into the office.

“Cassie.” Her eyes snapped to her younger sister who looked relieved to see her. She wasted no time in moving around the desk and launching at her older sister.

“Alpha Irwin, thank you for coming at such short notice.” Issac’s voice was tired and Ashton waved him off.

“You do the same for us, Issac. This young lady here is Trixie Teller.” Ashton gestured to Trixie who found herself feeling like a deer caught in headlights.

“Miss Teller, I’m so pleased to be finally meeting you, I just wish it was under better circumstances.” She gave him a wry smile in return.

“Likewise, Alpha Lockard.” 

“Looks like humans can be taught manners, brat.” Issac’s voice carried to Cassidy, Trixie shooting a confused look to her Alpha who simply shook his head when Cassidy laughed.

“Oh no. With her own Alpha, she’s worse than what I was. With her sister, they tease him relentlessly.” She fired back before letting the girl go.

“Trix, this is my sister Hope. Long story short, she’s next for the Alpha title.” Trixie nodded as she shook hands with Hope.

“It’s nice to meet you Hope, I’ve heard a lot about you.” Hope gave her a crooked smirk.

“All lies, I assure you.” And Trixie giggled.

The giggle broke some of the tension and Issac’s shoulders slumped as he ran a hand down his face. 

Cassidy truly saw her previous Alpha in that moment, the tired lines around his eyes. 

“How’s Pandora?” Cassidy’s question brought a smile to his face. 

“Good. Little Jessie is driving her mother mad.” This made Cassidy laugh. A few years after she’d left the pack, Issac had announced his mates pregnancy with sheer glee and she loved getting updates from him about the rascal. 

“At least Pandora knows how to handle rambunctious pups with no sense of self-preservation.” Issac chuckled as he rummaged through papers before handing them over to Ashton. 

“I understand the need to keep Miss Teller protected but does she need to be here for this?” Trixie remained silent, only casting a glancing look to her Alpha. 

“She’s a true prophet.” Issac’s jaw fell slack, a gasp of air escaping from Matthew. Hope held a look of polite confusion. 

“ Touched by the goddess herself.” Matthew whispered and Trixie shifted uncomfortably under the stares. 

“Pack it in. She’s frightened enough and doesn’t need you two confusing her.” Cassidy snapped at them both and the two men exchanged looks. 

“Cassie, you remember when we thought you were a prophet but instead you were scarily smart?” Matthew tried to keep his awe from his voice but didn’t quite succeed. 

“I only know what you told me. I don’t remember much else.” At this, Matthew sighed before sitting down. Issac pressed his lips together. 

“Do you want me to tell her?” Matthew shook his head. 

“Tell me what?” The hesitation was in Cassidy’s voice as she looked between her dad and old Alpha with  uncertainty. 

“Parts of your memories don’t remember it because the Elders locked it away. When you were seven, you’d been stolen from under our noses.” 

Her body went still. 

“We believe that it’s linked with this killing. There’s no recognisable scent and it was a child who was not only human but one we’d been watching for prophetic tendencies.” 

“You’re not telling me everything.” She could see the tears in her dad's eyes and then she slowly realised. 

“No.” The word was a whisper but Matthew flinched. 

She could never remember her mother’s death. She was told that it was a sudden death, that there was no notable cause for it. She’d been seven at the time because her eighth birthday had been the first one without her mother. Jamie had been three. 

“They killed her in retaliation to us rescuing you.” She could feel her heart shatter. It was too much and with the situation going on, she couldn’t take off like she wanted to. 

“I need to go.” She was up and out of the room, the tears running down her face as she took off for her old home, using one of the pack cars they’d arrived in. 

Ashton didn’t even have a chance to try and stop her, the sudden heartbreak catching him off guard mixed with the overwhelmed feeling. 

“I take it that the Elders locking the memory away was for her benefit?” Ashton couldn’t be angry. He understood to an extent that to watch a child suffer like so was difficult. 

He watched as tears rolled down his father-in-law’s face. 

“She awoke every night screaming. There were days when she would fight to get out of the house, her trauma so much that she couldn’t tell that I was her own father.” Matthew sounded so broken, Issac’s hand coming to rest on his Beta’s shoulders. 

“Alpha?” Trixie’s voice was nervous and Ashton turned to the teenager and noted the pale pallor her skin took. 

“Trixie? Are you okay?” The second he said that, her body slumped into the chair and Ashton swore. 

“This is too fucking much Selene.” He snarled, scooping the teenager up, cradling her carefully. Hope looked stunned for a second. 

“Selene?” In truth, although Ashton had known she was there, she’d kept herself quiet enough to have become background noise, something he wouldn’t have noticed had she not spoken up. 

“Young Trixie usually has prophetic dreams, only once has she gone into a trance. But with the prophetic dreams, if she is awake at an inconvenient time, she will suffer in such a way until she passes out. Cassidy believes this to be because she is young and therefore is not trained to handle the drastic changes.” 

“Your mate may be onto something there, Ashton.” Issac finally hummed. 

The young human twitched and the colour began to return to her cheeks and Ashton sighed. 

“You love her like your own, don’t you?” Matthew murmured, his face clear of tears but his eyes rimmed red. Ashton nodded. 

“She has kind and loving parents who love her and her sister. It’s not a parental kind of love, more like I see her as a younger sister, someone to protect. It’s the same with her older sister. The only instinct that is stronger is my bond to Cass.” Hope giggled. 

The giggle once more eased the tensions that had been building up and he felt the heartbreak ease in his chest. She was somewhere safe. 

“And what’s so funny little miss?” Matthew teases his youngest child, unable to stop the smile at her cheeky grin. 

“Sounds to me that Alpha Irwin got bitten by the same thing that had Cassie practically adopt me so many years ago. The only thing that was stronger than the bond she has with me was the one that Leo created. It’s why when the bond was broken, my bond with her was what eased it and helped me function.” Hope explained gently and Ashton understood. 

His awe for his sister-in-law increased tenfold and she found herself blushing at his impressed look. 

Matthew finally chuckled. 

“Somehow we thought she was just an anomaly, however the fates certainly matched you two well, Ashton.” And Ashton grinned. 

Trixie finally stirred and her cheeks went dark as she pressed her face into Ashton’s shoulder. 

“It happened again didn’t it?” 

“Unfortunately so, my favourite human.” At the muffled curse, Ashton laughed. 

“Selene really picks her moments.” She finally pulled away and retook her seat, eyes locking onto Hope. 

“When Luna returns tomorrow, you and her will need to head to the next city over, without guards shadowing you. One to drive and one as a backup but they stay in the car. A rogue is unsure and has the information we need. Selene wishes for him to be tried under pack law and for Luna to use her gift on him to get the truth.” Ashton knew better than to voice the outrage but he tampered it down to a raised eyebrow. 

Issac and Matthew however, disagreed entirely, voicing their displeasure. 

“Hope that’s an ambush at best, suicide trip at worst!” Issac snapped and Trixie turned her gaze to the other Alpha. Ashton recognises the look immediately and turned his attention to the other three. 

“You will listen to my avatar on this earth Issac James. The rogue is unsure about the goals of the rebellion and is pulling away. Cassidy Helen will set things right for another pack and give Hope Rose a second chance.” 

Both Issac and Matthew froze. 

“Selene.” They whispered in unison. Hope was speechless. 

Ashton tried not to smirk as Trixie returned her attention to Ashton. 

“I will visit Cassidy Helen tonight. Do not panic if you feel your bond fall dormant. I’m most proud of you Ashton Fletcher.” He simply inclined his head before he watched Trixie give a little shake before meeting her Alpha’s amused gaze. 

“At least it wasn’t in front of a prisoner this time?” She offered timidly and Ashton burst out into baritone laughter. 

“Life will never be dull with you and your sister around, Trixie. Issac, Hope, Matthew, we will see ourselves down to the canteen for some food and let you digest this information. As you realise, this cannot be known by anyone, not even Jamie until Selene deems it safe. Like you said, the trees have ears.” 

Issac could only nod weakly before Ashton escorted Trixie down to the lower floors where the canteen was situated and they got themselves some food. 

Trixie remained by his side, unwilling to stray towards the unfamiliar stares. She felt like she was under such scrutiny but once those eyes turned to the man next to her, their gazes dropped and they never cast a look in her direction. 

Confused, Trixie turned to Ashton to question the strange behaviour but then she saw the murderous look upon her Alpha’s face and understood why they averted their gazes so fast. 

Unsure how the other wolves would take her teasing her Alpha, she kept herself formal. 

“Alpha, will Luna be okay?” Ashton glanced at the teenager and noted her shy hesitance. He smiled kindly at her as they collected food. She didn’t protest when he paid for it. 

“This was just a step too far. She needs to process that before she’ll come back. She’ll always come back to us, but much like when you hide away after it’s been an overwhelming day, it’s been an overwhelming week for her. We just need to give her space.” Understanding dawned as they sat down and ate silently, listening to the steady flow around them. 

It was towards the end of their lunch that Hope appeared, paying no mind to the small bows from her pack. Trixie frowned. 

“May I join you?” Hope’s question was met with a nod from Ashton but the frown on Trixies face didn’t let up. 

As Hope sat down, she finally caught the look on the teenagers face and raised an eyebrow. 

“Everything okay Miss Teller?” The use of her last name startled her and a blush coated her cheeks but she remained silent. Hope wasn’t too sure how to take this and Ashton snorted. 

“She takes offence to ignoring your pack when they acknowledge you. It’s not something I like to practice unless I’m in an emergency.” Ashton explained softly, and Hope had the decency to look ashamed. 

“It’s still something I can never believe. Alpha Issac is still working on that with me.” Trixie nodded but remained silent as she took another bite of food, clearing the plate.

Ashton had pushed his plates to the side long ago but waited for the teenager, knowing her discomfort.

“Would you like to see her training? Your sister has been training her so far and it’d be nice to get an outsiders opinion of her progress who knows where she should ideally be.” Trixie grinned and Hope returned it with a smile of her own. 

“I would be delighted Alpha Irwin. Miss Teller, if you would follow me?” And the trio left without another word between them, the stares of the pack members following them out of the doors. 

-

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[she-toadmask]

I’m in a mood tonight so have me rambling about my music tastes below the cut

Eclectic is a good word for my music tastes like

In theory I like musical theater, in practice I have a few shows I know and like, a few songs that came on a tv radio thing from a musical I have heard nothing else from, and little to no opinion on anything else. Chicago? Great. Sweeney Todd? Haven’t listened in a while, has a couple of no-no songs, pretty good. Little Shop of Horrors? Haven’t found a recording I like for Dentist but the music is great. CATS? 2019 fucked up the music, London cast recording is where it’s at, shame that Growltiger is so racist because the parts that aren’t being racist are great fun (London not Broadway). There are definitely others (Mean Girls is fun, Be More Chill is pretty fun too, I really like the junior version of Seussical’s music, Something Rotten has a lot of fun songs), and while I’m not a Disney stan or anything I do like the style of a lot of the music, especially villain songs, sometimes I want songs that are like Disney villain songs in style but aren’t those songs specifically and it is so hard to figure out how to look that up and it is frustrating. Most things not on that list...I probably haven’t listened to and therefore have no opinion. (Phantom of the Opera is not my vibe though I’m sorry it is important because it’s been running for so long but that is just not my type of music)

I like late 2000s to mid 2010s pop music, that was when my dad got some CDs for a birthday or something and then I ended up listening to them a lot for some reason, also when I liked Just Dance a lot and listened to the radio in the car going places. There are definitely older songs I like and probably a few more recent ones but really that’s the time frame where I liked the most mainstream music. Not that that’s a good or bad thing, it’s just a thing.

Specific artists, when it comes to music that isn’t fan music, Voltaire and Creature Feature are my favorites. Most songs of theirs I’ve listened to, I like.

There are also probably some other artists that I like a lot of their songs but don’t pay enough attention to recognize they’re the same group in those songs, mostly thanks to this one Creepypasta-themed playlist that obviously had a lot of edgy music. Lots of MCR, Set it Off is a group that I’ve heard a number of good songs from, Hollywood Undead (apparently maybe there was some member drama, idk I just like what I’ve heard both pre- and post-whatever happened), probably some other groups with multiple songs.

And then there’s fan content. Random Encounters is my long-term favorite, the tone of the music is generally pretty light, idk they do a slight musical theater style (they call their songs ‘musicals’ so yeah that’s a vibe), and while their members have changed, the music is still really fun. The Stupendium! I found him pretty recently and boy I’m glad I did, he does more rap-style content, like a number of his songs are raps, but don’t let that turn you off before giving it a listen. Even outside of being about the game itself, a few of his songs just slap really hard, a few being very very anti-capitalist or just social commentary because of the source game, and just very very good. The Fine Print is a really really really good one that is also ‘capitalism sucks’, It’s A Joy isn’t really capitalism-related but someone could probably write a thinkpiece about societal stuff with it, I haven’t listened to it as much but A Matter of Factories (not to be confused with the similarly named A Matter of Facts, a rap that is just a bunch of trivia, sparked by a challenge by another channel) is also pretty anti-capitalist and anti-imperialism, another that isn’t exactly anti-capitalist but more an examination of society and stuff is Vault Number 76. I don’t even know much about any of the source games (aside from 76 being a glitchy nightmare lmao) but the songs all still slap. I almost forgot about Nook Line and Sinker, another wonderful anti-capitalism song. (Adding in A Purpose for New London. More social examination. I like the other guy’s ending better on a vocal level, but both are very very good.) (somehow I forgot Doctor! Doctor! which has its humor from the game it’s about but also has bits about how private healthcare is fucked up. The Stupendium is British BTW) If you just want some fun shit, he’s got that too. The Most Fashionable Faction is just a fun TF2 rap, An Impostor Calls is one of the collab songs he did with another guy and it’s pretty fun, I only have heard one ending of the Lego vs Minecraft rap battle but it seems pretty fun, These Hallowed Wings is a lighthearted one, Why Did I Say Okie Doki? is DDLC vibes of course so creepy but also with some upbeat to it (does that even make sense), Losing My Patients is kinda fucked up because Surgeon Simulator but it’s also really fun, What A Fowl Day is a very very good one, Way Deeper Down is good if you like Undertale (it’s also just genuinely good and fun). Honestly the only two I would rather skip when listening to him on shuffle are the two that have him partnering with SquigglyDigg, neither of the songs have anything wrong with them particularly I just. remember Squiggly’s awful takes on Lilo and Stitch and how she is the kind of person that’s like ‘you can call yourself whatever you want but there are only two genders’ and is miffed when people don’t recognize she’s a girl from her (drawn) profile pic like she gets upset about people trying to be polite because she disagrees with them being respectful to nb people or some shit

Also I like lyrics a lot and sometimes I can just go off vibes (like I don’t really like the really really heavy metal stuff like it’s really annoying when I’m like ‘I want a song about a deal with another power’ and all that comes up is either really heavy metal that is just loud and I don’t know what they’re saying (I’M NOT DISSING IT IT JUST ISN’T MY TYPE OF MUSIC) or a type of blues or something that also isn’t usually what I’m after at that time) but I also have a lot of appreciation for good lyrics and lyrics about stuff I like (which led to my friend being weirded out because she doesn’t listen as closely to lyrics as I do so when I tried to share some Stupendium songs she was just listening to the vibes and was like ‘you listen to weird music’) so like what it’s about matters

Also Biggering slaps. That is very tangential but it just slaps, go listen to it. How Bad Can I Be is fine I guess, like it’s catchy and all, but Biggering is just so much better. (The fact that multiple people have written video essays about Biggering and that movie should speak to how good it is. At least go listen once you can look it up on YouTube it’s just really good)

Also mental animatics are a thing. They just are. So that also can affect how I feel about a song.

Oh and The Cog Is Dead has a lot of good songs, how did I forget them

[freewheelshippin]

30 utapri questions!

Thanks @dekiaibadchoices​ for the tag, this was an awesome way to wind down after a ton of nonstop busy busy busy!!! (and thanks for tagging this blog vs the general utapri one so i can REALLY gush LOL) Here’s the OG meme! 

1. Your best boy?

BANANAMAN RAN WHO ELSE  

2. Your least favorite boy?

“least favorite” implies dislike which...not true! truthfully it’s much of HEAVENS by nature of ‘I haven’t spent as much time getting to know these characters so I don’t really know who they are.’ (though I already know I love to go for drinks and snacks with Van hehe) i do like all of HEAVENS quite a bit from what i’ve seen so far but that affection has not had time to ripen! 

3. A character that you never thought you would love as much as you do now?

mnmnj ranran tbh 

4. A character you can relate to in any way?

I can’t answer everything with Ranmaru but like. His ambition, straightforwardness, and how the soul and spirit of music motivate him to move forward beyond a tough past are things I same hat so much ;; But HONESTLY I also relate a lot to Masa and Tokiya, especially in their moments of self-doubt and dramatic commitment to to their art? 

5. A character that you think deserves more love?

Oh, Cecil, without a doubt. He’s such a resilient, committed, and open-hearted cutie and gets really shafted by canon tbh. Which makes it harder for everyone to see what a great boy this sweetie is! But I appreciate how Shining Live has given him some room to have really cute and standout moments so everyone can love him more but okay like, give me more Ceci and Ran palling around I love him most when they’re up to shenanigans 

6. A character you would want as your partner?

well we’re posting this fuckin here so you all fuckin know (im very embarrass rn i can barely say it lmao) 

(for the record i would also very much like to be friends with reiji and syo, they are cool people i think i’d get along with! and i know myself, if i knew otoya or masato IRL i’d just be like ‘well. that’s my son now’ and basically appoint myself their tough big sis-type-friend lookin out for them lol) 

7. A character you would want as your mentor/senpai?

I would swallow a pinecone before I called him ‘onii-san’ but teach me how to network kotobuki-senpai 

(No, like, forreal, I suck so, so bad at a ton of stuff Reiji is aces at, and I respect the hell out of his *waves* general everything and skilll navigating the industry. Since I’m a goofy, jokey, overenthusiastic teacher for work a lot it’d be nice to be on the receiving end of all that energy! and be a fucking decent kouhai that isn’t so horribly unappreciative of all his hard work and good cheer ) 

8. Your favorite ship?

shut your whore mouth i dont have the marbles to write it out 

(tbh it’s also Haru/Tomo, I just feel so much more romantic chemistry between those two than Haru and any of the boys u___u  Friends’ selfship stuff goes without saying, haha, and ngl I’m kind of About a Ren/Van rivalry hatemance? can i call it a kismesis thing? it’s a kismesis thing.) 

(actually no I think I’m just a member of the “Ren Fucks and sometimes it’s Hatesex” club) 

9. A character that you want to cosplay/have already cosplayed?

I had plans to cosplay Ranmaru a couple months ago bc it’s really not much of a stretch for my wardrobe, haha, but I dunno about that anymore! Part of it was wanting the Euphoria of looking like a tough, twunky, princely anime character but tbqh I’m already that every day of my life so 

I suppose if you were to pull my leg I’d go for cosplaying Van, mostly because I wanna try that mullet on for myself. 

10. Favorite side character?

TOMO!! LOVE U BITCH WHEN WILL I HEAR U SINGGGGGG 

11. Your favorite solo song?

god this is horrible how can I decide??? so many good ones??? I think it’s a draw between Top Star Revolution, No. 1, Brand New Melody, Wild Soul, Seien Brave Heart, and Junketsu Nara Ai ~Aspiration~ ??? 

12. Your favorite duet song?

HMMMMM again too many good ones. Three-way tie between Haru Hana, NorthWind and SunShine, and Original Resonance! 

13. Your favorite trio song?

Ahhh Dream More than Love is really nostalgic bc it’s the first Utapri song I really loved, but i gotta be real. It’s just Egoistic. There’s just no getting better than Egoistic 

14. Your favorite group song?

mmmm i’m be basic. Poison Kiss 

15. Your least favorite song?

I love Ai and Shouta Aoi’s incredible voice but......I’m really not a fan of super slow, overly-saccharine songs. u__u so A.I. really, really doesn’t land with me, much less so than easygoing (like Knocking on the Mind) or somber (like Winter Blossom) songs. 

16. Your favorite singer?

ranran...it’s always ranran...

(I do also adore Natsuki’s and Camus’s voices! I tend to like deeper, richer vocal qualities, but you just can’t beat Ranmaru’s subtle growls and high-energy rock!!!! <3) 

17. Your favorite group/trio/duo?

god what combo of these idiots DONT i love? I could watch Reiji prank and tease Ranmaru all fuckin day, and I also really like it when Ran’s at his most ‘tuff big bro-y’ with, like, Ai, Otoya, and Cecil!!! but honestly I do like how the Ran/Masa/Ren trio isn’t so straightforward and is more or less held together by a thin string of professionalism, there’s something i appreciate about not forcing ppl to just bury the hatchet and be Perfect Friends but you all can still care about each other? (Ranmaru needs to be nicer to them still but...) 

i need to suggest one that isn’t ranmaru centric fjdsioafjsa i fuckin love Soccer Buds (otosyo) and I loooooove it when Otoya and Cecil are good to each other!!! 

18. Your favorite member of Starish?

they’re all my favorite but if you REALLY had to make me pick.....Masato, probably, haha. I just...if you take yourself too seriously and care so much about everything but still know how to be Nasty how can I not love you??? 

19. Your favorite member of Quartet Night?

what do you fuckin think, hoss 

20. Your favorite member of Heavens?

I mentioned earlier I don’t really know Heavens well, so ofc this is all liable to change! But off the bat I love what a conniving yet wholesome bastard Eiichi is and Van is just the kinda guy I would rib and pal around with IRL!! 

21. Your favorite seiyuu/voice actor?

Ahhh that’s tough! I love all these goofbags, and Tattsun really is just so cool and makes music I’m pretty about. But I think I gotta give it to Suwabe, his performances are always so him but still pretty varied, and how can you not adore a man who loves his chihuahuas that much??? 

(if i’m being 100% honest Tattsun lost points bc he voices my absolute least favorite character in granblue ffjsfjisda) 

22. Favorite Drama CD?

HMMMMMMM see as a certified Giant Tool for Everything Mecha and silly and extra, I enjoyed the hell out of Polaris, but it really suffers from a lack of Ranmaru in my humble fuckin opinion lmao. So even though I’m not one for pirate stuff most of the time, I gotta give it to Pirates of the Frontier!! I really loved Ranmaru and Otoya’s dynamic in that one, and Camus was juuuuust the right amount of shitheel, too. 

I haven’t heard the whole thing but that thing from Egoistic where Natsuki squeezes Ranmaru to death and Eiichi’s just like ‘WUAHAHAHAHAH’ is also the mcfuckin best. 

23. Your favorite shining live card?

CAN’T PICK 

HOW COULD I POSSIBLY PICK?????????? LIKE??? I love the fucking dumb, dumb, dumb ostentatiousness of Evil Villains, I LOVE a good heel, and I also worked so so hard to t1 that event and had a lot of fun doing it!! But also, I just love his big smile and all the energy and mixed prints from Fortune and Prosperity, and it was literally the first time I ever got the exact card I was rolling for in a gacha on the last pull I had left!! (He also came home during a time I was really going through some shit, and ngl it rescued me a little bit!) but AHHHH Soulful Bass also came out right around my birthday, I love all the textures in the outfit and it’s generally the most My Aesthetique thing Utapri has ever released!!! And god, I just love it when he’s so confident and in his element like this, it sets me on FIRE to see him light up the stage wurghjgfj ;___; They all make me just want to HUG SO MUCH ARGGHHHHH 

24. Your favorite song beatmap?

Ahhh I think Shining Live really has great beatmaps across the board so that’s a tough pick! Almost all of them are super fun in their own way, but I think I gotta hand it to Wild Soul, Top Star Revolution, and Innocent Wind! 

25. Your least favorite song beatmap?

A.I. u__u Sorry, Ai...it’s just not fun for me.

26. Black Deja Vu or White Gravity?

Actually I’m really glad for this question bc I’ve been so busy lately I hadn’t given myself the time to really check them out! checking ......... 

and yep. Black Deja Vu. (I mean...Ranmaru is on it, haha.) But I’m so about this. Love this heavier sound and all these harmonies, this is so juicy. (White Gravity also absolutely kicks ass though!! I’m really liking that voice group, it’s making especially good use of those higher registers!) 

27. Utapri merch that you own/want?

Honestly I don’t have much u__u Not a lot of Utapri merch is my thing...you know? I’m mostly shopping for Ran merch if I’m getting any, but I’m very picky about how he gets drawn? Keeping his toughness and a particular clothing style about him is so essential, haha, and barely anything hits that sweet spot for me. But I will say I adored the whole ‘My Favorite Things’ series, and if I had the budget and space atm I’d love to get some of the Ran goodies from that line! 

28. How did you get into Utapri?

I first heard about it through some acquaintances from cosplay before Quartet Night was a thing. It didn’t appeal enough to my heavy metal ass to make me drop everything and try it, but I did have an interest in it I couldn’t explain and I’d always intended on trying it out. (especially after I got into Love Live and idol anime for a bit.) But it was Shining Live that got me! And I really only downloaded Shining Live because I was super exhausted after a business trip, didn’t want to leave bed once I got back home, and just wanted to sink my teeth in something new I could enjoy for hours while lying down, haha.  

29. A set theme in shining live that you want to see in the future?

This will surprise nobody, but something tougher. More rock, more punk, more metal. I want all of them in studs and spikes and leather, and I want less polish. More rough! 

I’d also love a wrestler set complete with who’s-a-heel-who’s-a-face but that’s a pipe dream and a half, lmao. 

30. Why do you love your best boy?

Oh boy. 

I think he’s this powerhouse of a human bean who can face a ton of pain and meet it with a big middle finger. And that middle finger is chasing after ambitious dreams, of spreading the power and soul of the same music that made me who I am and influences so much of my work, but also being ... you know, smart about it? He’s an idol because like, sure, maybe it’s not the OG dream, but you can’t dream if you’re dead, and you also deserve to give yourself a life and platform to share some of who you are, and you can do a lot of good with that, too. (And I won’t lie, I respect the drama of a man who takes his hair that seriously and commits so hard to the aesthetic he wears fuckin mismatched contacts i just. charm point ) 

But at the same time....I don’t know, this might sound presumptuous, but. I think. I just think he’d think I’m as neat as I think he is. I’m an ambitious, passionate person, too, and I also furiously stick to my ideals, and I also love the same kind of soul of music he does. I lean a little more metal than I do rock, but I think that’s nice, like sharing it has that ‘alike but different’ kind of familiarity and novelty all at once. Sometimes it’s tough sharing just how deeply rock and metal have sculpted me and my artwork (and therefore my career), bc it’s so deeply personal to me, and sometimes there’s weird elitism/misogyny/racism to deal with, too. But. The way he talks about rock, the way he describes the passion and how it transcends identity and is just a pure rush of power and sharing your feelings..................it just feels like he Gets it the same way I do. Just that unspoken, burning passion and understanding. I know it sounds weird to feel that strongly over just a music genre, but I just vibe with how to him, it really isn’t ‘just’ a music genre. I feel more accepting of myself for it, and I’d like to think he’d be real proud of himself for that.  

And listen, like....I’m very sentimental, but I really don’t like saccharine, flowery, romantic kinds of affection to be lavished on me. Just be straightforward but also a little tsun about it fjdsjfas and ..... those are the kind of feelings I can accept. And that’s the way Ranmaru is, and it’s also grounded in the kind of reality that I don’t like to be swept away from. He’s just so cool and hardworking and unwavering in his passion, it makes it easier for me to do the same despite all the bumps in the road. This got real long but Ran’s a cool dude, haha, I got a lot of positives to say. 

Anyways, I never tag folks for these things, but I love seeing everyone’s answers! If you see this and wanna fill it, feel free to count this as a tag from me :) I know this got real long, but with 30 questions how could it not haha? Thanks for reading and sticking around! 

[authenticaussie]

Hmm... 18 (soul eater au), 52 (roommate), 42 (marvel), 98 (leverage), and or 14 (lantern lights)

babe……….you’re my Favourite™

also, under a readmore because this got LONG as SHIT

8. Soul Eater au

the soul eater au is really scattered because my wifi sucked on that particular day and I was posting it in the mas chat (sunshinepunks) BUT the basis is weapons ace & sabo and meister Marco. It’s a lot of “dumbasses refuse to accept New Friends (because TraumaTM)” and Ace/Sabo being dicks to Marco because he refuses to give up on them. (ahhh my favourite dynamic //swoons)

Part of the plot - my favourite part of the plot - is that Sabo spends a lot of time spying on Marco to try and catch him out as Secretly A Dick and Manipulating Them, and ends up finding out that Marco really really cares about him and Ace? And the way to Sabo’s heart is thrrrroooough his besssstieeeee lmao. So Sabo ends up crushin’ hard first, but then SPYING BACKFIRES and paranoia kicks his butt and he Feels Bad because he was ONLY MEANT TO TRUST ACE and Marco HURT HIS FEELINGS (sabo you moron it’s your own fault). Anyway Ace and Marco pair up to try and make Sabo feel better and it drives Sabo even Nuttier until there is battle couple stuff and a mid-fight Feelings Fight and then a confession and then they become the DMCA power couple. Ta-da!

Ace was a pipe and Sabo was a knife! Or…..you know, something in that realm pft. Basically hitty-stick and stabby-stabby, because you could make a) an argument for their personalities Being Like That (ace is blunt and strong and easy to just hit with but if you’re clever about it he’s awesome, and has the reach to be a longer weapon, sabo is more…well a knife can be used for a lot but also it’s very….vicious. There is very little you can do to Incapacitate with a knife that is not Wow Stabbed. Which I feel is very Sabo, he’s kinda…harsh??? in his way of handling battle, I think.) and b) because in canon, Sabo’s weapon is a pipe and Ace has that knife, and I thought it’d be cool to match that.

42. New Roommate Wanted

an OC-based commission!! James moves in with a shape-shifting thief and her GF and accidentally Falls In Love snickers

It is………..I wrote it a while ago so you can definitely see the self-projection of “I want cute rich gfs to love and adore me so I don’t have to stress about a job”

52. 5+1 Marvel AU

in the actual word document the title is “If you’re broken I will mend you” (Or 5 Times Sabo was There for his Team (and one time histeam was there for him). Sabo is Coulson and Marco is Hawkeye and Ace is a Black Widow (codename: Redback). It fluctuates between sorta implying MAS (but with a definite focus on Marco/Ace) and Coby/Sabo mainly because I made Coby Captain America (YOU CAN’T!!! ARGUE!!! WITH ME!!! HE IS!!!! PERFECT!!! AS CAP!!!) and I love fics that have the lowkey “Coulson has a fanboy crush on Cap.” lol. 

(also coby/sabo is. fun? crackship but So Fun.) 

Here’s the shortest one haha

It takes about five minutes after the comms. go silent forSabo to know that something is wrong, and two minutes afterwards to gear up.

It takes him approximately four seconds to tear through the people trying to keep him from helping Ace and Marco.

(It takes two weeks for them to heal, no matter how fastSabo was, and a month for Sabo to get off desk duty, but Ace and Marco refuseto do missions when he’s not their handler. They refuse to do anything thatinvolves leaving his side until after he assures them he’s fine, and that hewasn’t just a S.H.I.E.L.D agent because he had a pretty face - though that hadprompted an argument about Sabo’s ‘pretty face’ that he’d had to steadfastlyignore.)

88. LEVERAGE AU MOTHERFUCKER

THIEVES! CON ARTISTS! So this one is actually three different aus in one file - there’s a “MAS but as Leverage” and it starts out as “Ace and Sabo who fill in Every Job They Can (but their specialties are Ace = grifter/hacker and Sabo = hitter/thief and I have reasons, okay) and then they try and run a con on Marco but he’s like Um Excuse Me? And then he gets dragged into their Bullshit snickers. Oh ALSO they ONE THOUSAND PERCENT do not realise they are Madly In Love With Him (but he does. And he’s trying to be patient. But also. Dying. Because wow it’s kinda awkward being in love with. two daredevil thieves)

The second one in the doc is the Leverage trio in the OP world, ‘cause duh, and Parker starts off like…trying to steal kids from being SMILE experiments? and hires Eliot and Hardison to help her. Um I think I wanted to give Hardison a DF?? But I had a whole list: there was altering people’s sight/perceptions, being able to edit vision/specifics of reality in lines of like, code?? (aka he could do Little Changes but they could affect Big Things, a butterfly effect sort of DF). A lot of them were trying to give him a way to…manipulate stuff in a world where tech wasn’t as big a thing.  

And the third one is ASL leverage! Marco still gets dragged into the disaster but it’s more found family stuff. 

14. Lantern Lights

Lantern Lights is technically posted [here] under “all the light we cannot hold” BUT I have MORE. I wanted to make it longer when I originally posted it - mainly because Lea asked for angst - but I ended up running out of time (I am………so bad at deadlines, jfc). Plus, with all the things I wanted to include it honestly would’ve turned into something RIDICULOUSLY long and I was already pushing 5k when gifts were a minimum of 1k.

This was the original start / end bracketing.

START:

HiAce.

Hispencil hesitated above the empty page, only a single lead smudge marring theotherwise blank paper, and Sabo sighed softly. Eraser nub ticking against thedesk, he bit his lower lip and tried to think of what else to write. He had somuch to say – about Marco, and the Whitebeards, and about the new friends he’dslowly been making, like Koala and Hack and even the standoffish, arrogant Law,but it’d been so long since he sat down to write Ace a letter that the wordsseemed to have vanished.

Hi Ace, heread, as though the greeting would organise what he wanted to say intoneat lines for him to write. He heaved another sigh, resting his chin in hispalm. Casting his eyes up to the window above his desk he watched as theburning dusk faded into twilight blue and the stars began to shine, silverglints of light that were mirrored by the compound’s lanterns flaring to life.The gleamed against the darkness and Sabo couldn’t help but be reminded ofAce’s fire. How it glowed beneath his skin, lighting him bright red in fury orembarrassment or glorious gold in his joy. Sometimes Sabo couldn’t help butwish – but hope – that Ace was still burning, somewhere out there. In the sky,with the stars-

Hecouldn’t help but selfishly hope that Ace had given part of his fire to Sabo’sheart, to burn within him.

Sabogrowled, burying his face in his hands to try and stop the subtle sting formingin his eyes. It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair that so many simple things couldremind him of Ace, that undeniable frustration at his uselessness still restedheavy in his every thought, that the feelings he wanted to put to paper wereimpossible to articulate.

Thesharp tip of his pencil cracked as he pressed it into the paper, and the threewords he wrote turned from his usual neat cursive into a jagged scrawl.

I miss you.

END:

-Marco thinks that ouranniversary is the battle, but I don’t like it there. Besides, having ouranniversary on your birthday? You’d expect double gifts, and we can’t havethat.

Sabo’slips quirked into a bitter smile, his eyes drawn up to the small gift stillwrapped on his desk, bow deflated from his constant touches but nonethelessstill stubbornly holding onto the silver wrapping. He’d never had a chance togive Ace his birthday gift, and was sure that Ace wouldn’t have expected it.Would he have even been given gifts, when he’d been kept on the candle wick? Orwould the gift have been an extra moment of freedom, so painfully perfect in its rarity?

Pullinghis hair away from his face, Sabo gently bit his lip and scanned what he’dalready written, trying to figure out what else to say. His fringe curled infront of his eyes when he took up his pen again, but he barely paid attentionto the soft brush of hair against his scar tissue. Two years of having them hadgotten him used to his limited vision and things in front of his face that hecouldn’t see. 

He’d never seen Ace’sflustered thoughts, nor known what each fleeting touch had meant until it had beenfar too late, and couldn’t help but wonder just how blind he’d been back then.

Did I tell you thatMarco finally stopped being chickenshit and used the word ‘boyfriend’? I feellike that counts more as our anniversary than the battle, especially consideringI wasn’t much better about speaking up about “feelings” after you left. Twomonths of not talking over the topic because one third of the topic up and-

It’s pretty stupid ofus, huh?

I mean, you werepretty fucking stupid when you-

Sabocrossed out the last few words with two strokes of thick black ink, his teethgrit in a way that made his head pound.

Regardless, everythingis going fine, now. I’m sure you’d be happy to know that Marco and I havegotten past awkwardly refusing to admit to holding hands and have nowprogressed to awkwardly kissing each other on the cheek (and then refusing toadmit to it, of course. Got to keep consistency). You’d think that as someoneso attention-starved I’d be better at this, but it always feels…not wrong, persay, but, like something is missing because you’re not here.

You’re a dick forthat, Ace.

Anyway, this will bemy last letter for a while. I’m sorry it’s short, but I’m already running late;Koala and I are set to sail with the afternoon tide, for Flevance, and Marco isgoing troll hunting. Whitebeard heard there was trouble with the gnomes in thefar north mountains, so he’s going to check them out and I want to say goodbyebefore we part ways.

As always;

With love, Sabo.

[redrocx]

If it's ask game... 1-50.! Just because I don't want you to be bored! 🤣🥰

Oh wow, what a task 😆 I had lots of fun, thank you so much, sweetie 💕

1. First things first, did you have a good year? -- hmmm it's a good middle, I'd say. Lots of ups and downs but also made lots of progress health-wise.

2. How old did you turn this year? -- 24

3. Do you feel your age? -- lmao tbh I feel so damn old or more like tired of life lol (not in a suicidal way just generally tired haha)

4. Did your appearance change in anyway? -- cut my hair a few weeks ago, got new glasses

5. Post your favorite selfie. -- oh man I'm usually not comfortable posting selfies lol I won't do it for personal reasons, sorry 😬

6. If you traveled, where did you go? -- Paris and Vienna (both for concerts lol)

7. Which fashion trends did you love? -- I'm not much into fashion and don't keep up lol

8. Which fashion trends did you hate? -- same as 7

9. What was your favorite article of clothing this year? Post a pic if possible? -- hoodies, I've been wearing them whenever I can. Also a new pair of pants (too lazy to get up and take a pic though lol)

10. What song sums up this year for you? -- actually two songs, This Is Me from the Greatest Showman and The Very Last Time by Bullet For My Valentine

11. What album came out and has been on heavy rotation since then? -- Rammstein by Rammstein

12. What was your favorite movie of the year? -- Avengers Endgame *sobs heavily*

13. Did an actor/actress catch your attention for the first time this year? -- cant think of anyone in particular

14. Favorite new TV show? -- the Blacklist

15. Which new ship/fandom has taken over a lot of your time, attention, and tears? -- there's two ships lol one old (Soukoku) and one newish (Lawlu). Fandom-wise I've finally started watching Naruto, and then Rammstein (though I'm not particularly involved in the fandom)

16. What food did you try for the first time? -- persimmons (I don't like them lol)

17. Did you make any big permanent changes this year? -- well I finally started driving school lol if that counts

18. What was one nice thing you did for someone else? -- wrote a birthday oneshot for a friend

19. What was one nice thing you did for yourself? -- bought myself a Switch

20. Did you develop a new obsession? -- Rammstein

21. Did you vote? -- yes!

22. Did you move? -- sadly not yet

23. Did you get a job? -- old job but got a promotion!

24. Did you get a pet? -- nope, my birb's still good and healthy 💕

25. Do you regret not doing anything? -- not leaving the G****** fandom sooner

26. Do you regret doing something? -- no, I don't think so

27. Have you done anything that scared you? -- enrolled for driving school

28. Did anyone/thing make you so mad it stayed with you for days? -- G****** fandom again/asshole people on social media in general

29. Did you lose anyone close to you? -- no, only people I *thought* I was close to

30. Did you fall in love? -- with Rammstein and back with One Piece, yes. Romantically, no

31. Did you fall out of love? -- no

32. Did you start a new relationship? -- only friendships

33. Did you go through a break up? -- no

34. Did you have to cut ties to someone? -- lots of people

35. Who was important to you this year but wasn’t important last year? -- @takashima-hikari 😘😘😘 I do hope I can meet you someday 😭😭 and cry over One Piece and abs together

36. Who wasn’t as important to you this year as they were last year? -- some friend(s)

37. If you could have a do over on one thing you did, would you take it? -- idk hm depends on the thing

38. What was the best moment of the year for you? -- attending the lives of my two favorite bands & meeting some of my dearest friends for the first time

39. What was the worst? -- getting suicidal over shit that happened in a fucking fandom and shouldn't have affected me this bad to begin with

40. Did anything happen that you were sure would change you as a person but it really didn’t? -- can‘t think of anything 🤔

41. Did anything happen to you that you were sure wouldn’t change you as a person but it did? -- honestly I started to realize a lot of my past mistakes while being confronted with similar situations I put friends in in the past and I'm trying to make amends and become a better person

42. What are you most proud of accomplishing? -- conquering my chronic pain & finally leaving a fandom that was more toxic to my mental health than it was good

43. What have you learned about yourself this year that you didn’t know in the years prior? -- the way my body functions and gets affected by emotional & mental turmoil and how to cope in healthy ways

44. Did your opinion of anyone change for the better? -- my dad (not that I thought of him as bad before but he's being showing an increasing support which makes me happy)

45. Did your opinion of anyone change for worse? -- lots of people (again that shouldn't have mattered in the first place but I'm the problem as we all know)

46. If you make resolutions, did you complete them this year? -- I don't think I had any

47. If you make resolutions, what will your resolutions be for the coming year? -- to keep improving both my mental and physical health, and to be more vigorous in taking actions to improve my mental health especially in regards to social media

48. If you could go on an adventure during the remaining days of the year, where would you go and what would you do?  Who would you go this? -- I'm actually meeting up with my family on Christmas in Berlin, that's all the adventure I need and am looking for~

49. What do you wish for others for the coming year? -- that they go through the same self-reflective and enlightening journey that I have been going through this year, and that other people (especially friends & family) will have the strength to get the help & support they may need

50. What do you wish for yourself? -- to become a better person, and to grow even more; to be someone my friends & family can (continue to) be proud of

[asrasleftnipple]

Backstory

Muriel x Lyria (oc)

*i don’t use my oc’s name in this but i wrote it w her in mind but! feel free to change the pronouns in your mind and imagine your apprentice in her place!

This is my first time posting a fic lol, shred me if you want, english is my first language so if it’s trash, i so sory

She has rich parents who don’t pay much attention to her but are also disappointed in her lascivious ways

Ended up getting kicked out of school but instead of going home, she began training under a talented herbalist

Learned magic accidentally 

Eventually left town with money, herbs, and a small makeshift medicine kit

Ended up in Vesuvia

Got famous on the way, she became really gifted 

Got invited to the palace when she arrived

Befriended Nadia (who really doesn’t care who fucks who)

Jucio took an interest to her immediately

He pestered her but she wasn’t taking his shit

Still ended up sleeping with him a few nights later (it was terrible)

Meets Asra the day after at a luncheon (at breakfast-time) in the garden

He warns her that Lucenzo isn’t who she thinks he is and tells her about his “Scourge of the South”

She was hella convinced

Asra tells her to get out as soon as possible

Arranges for her to meet a friend at the Rowdy Rave

She goes to the coliseum later that day with Nadia and Lucio

Horrified at the bloodlust

Horrified at Lucio

Horrified at the violence and gore

Slips through the crowd as soon as it’s over

She basically sprints to the Rowdy Raven and shouts breathlessly “Is anyone here a doctor?!”

Everyone just looks at her

Jules pops up all concerned and shit

“I’m a doctor, what’s wrong?! Who’s hurt??”

She’s like oh, do you know Asra?

Chaos ensues

Has to smuggle her ass through to the edge of the forest bc Ucio has guards scouring the city for his wayward “court magician” (she declined the job offer)

She dazzles him with her suave flirting and finesse until she ends up taking a fucking plunge into one of the canals

Ilya only has time to drag her out of the water, pry off a vampire eel and throw her over his shoulder because the guards spotted them and were coming in hot

When they reach the edge of the forest Muriel is waiting for them

She claims she’s fine and that she can stand and promptly eats shit

Falls towards Muriel instead of Julian

Muriel just lets her hit the ground bc he wasn’t expecting that at all

Julian has to stop the bleeding before they can even think about moving on

Muriel parts with Julian and carries her to his hut

She needs to recover for a few days, in that time Muriel discovers that she’s a mega flirt… just not with him. She can’t really talk properly around him…

Asra, and Julian (much to Muriel’s dismay), come through a few times to check on her

She immediately turns it on:

Asra is only a bit flustered at the beginning but starts to take it playfully

Ilya’s life is ruined

He can hardly form a proper sentence, she’s laying it on so thick

Might pass out from high blood pressure

One night, while Muriel’s with the chickens and Inanna, she asks Asra about Muriel’s scars (bc she can hardly look at him without actually making a whole fool of herself, nevermind ask him a personal question)

He pauses, “before I tell you, be patient and gentle with him?”, when she nods he pauses for a long time

Then all he says is “remember when I told you about the Scourge of the South...?”

She goes buckwild (Faust says Rowdy!)

Starts getting hysterical

“H-he did that to him!?!??!?!? That- that fucking monster!!!”

Tries to get up even though she’s still injured, Asra is like “oh shit chill”

“He’s killed so many people!! He’s like a fucking plague!”

Muriel overhears and just assumes she talking about him

Meanwhile, she’s still flipping tables inside calling The Count a variety of Bad Things

All of a sudden goes very still and very calm

“I’m going to kill him”

“N O”

Muriel’s heard enough (or so he thinks) and goes deeper into the forest with Inanna. He’s gone for hours

Meanwhile, she starts sobbing

Asra eventually calms her all the way down with some magic help, tea, and squeezes from Faust

She explains her whole predicament from sex with Lucio to her feelings for Muriel and how she feels like she owes it to Muriel to end The Count

Asra lets her cry on him until she falls asleep and he has to go back to the shop

It’s almost noon the next day and Muriel still isn’t back

She starts to panic “fuck, what if he heard me crying last night and thinks I’m fucking hysterical?”

Is restless as fuck

Finally over it, she puts on some clothes and leaves the hut (like a damned fool)

She calls out to Muriel for what feels like hours

She’s starting to feel dizzy… she hadn’t eaten that day and her wound? That shit hurted (but not as much as her heart!)

Decides to take a nap under a random tree, actually going into shock bc she fucked around and reopened the bite

Inanna smells the blood and leads an unknowing Muriel to her, sniffling at the unconscious magician (stupid head)

“What are you doing out here?!”

She jolts up and squints at him

“Puppy?”

He carries her back to the hut (bc he’s totally soft for her)

“What the hell were you thinking?”

“I just wanted to make sure you were safe”

“... what?”

He takes care of her bloodied clothes and redresses her wound

“... why … would you do something like that?”

“... I- I can’t tell you yet”

Muriel thinks it’s some assassination plot and gets hella closed off and also mad at himself because it was so fucking easy for her to get him right back where she wants him

He closes off immediately and she’s reminded of what Asra told her last night, why he’s a hermit who doesn’t trust anyone but him

Starts sniffling

“... what are you doing?”

Then she just flat out cries with them ghibli tears

“What’s wrong…??!” ol boy Muriel is starting to panic

She can only choke out “I am so sorry” over and over until she can’t speak properly

Muriel is still lost as hell “what do you have to be sorry for?”

She finally looks him in the eye “for sleeping with him! … for what he did to you”

Muriel is shook as fuck

“What he-? You.... you don’t think I’m a monster? That I’m a plague?”

She finally understands his meaning even though her mind is a fog of pain, dizziness, and tears

“Of course I don’t think that! I was talking about- … about Lucio. You’re not disgusted at me…?” she croaks

He shakes head and strokes her head softly as a fresh wave of tears hit her

Muriel sits on his bed with her silently until she falls asleep, curled up in pelts with Inanna

He thinks back to when she said that she would “kill him” and breathes out a short huff of a laugh

She’s so small and so fierce… like… a little bear

He knows she can’t go back to the city because of The Capricorn™️ and he’s already gotten used to having her around and so has Inanna

“Alright, Little Bear, don’t worry anymore”

He lets her feed the chickens all the time and cooks her favorite dish whenever she gets cramps

Eventually lets her braid his hair with flowers

Asra brings them their bread when he visits

Julian stops by a lot less frequently than Asra, but one night has them both try a salty bitters and is #banned

She dances in the rain too much and just grins at an exasperated Muriel when she drips water all over the goddamn floor

She makes Muriel sleep on his bed with her, she won’t take no for an answer

Learns to cook his favorite meal and has Julian smuggle her some black mead as a birthday surprise for Muriel

He actually smiles at her to her face!

One morning she’s trying to wake him up because his arm is heavy and she needs to get up to feed the chickens and he just mumbles “what is it, Little Bear?” and she just drops dead right there

The boys are devastated (kidding)

She just can’t speak properly for hours but Muriel falls back asleep, oblivious

She goes swimming with Inanna on a hot summer afternoon but stays out late so he goes to find her for dinner

She neked

He wasn’t fucking ready

He’s red for the rest of the night and she’s like Muriel: 264; me: 1

Sometimes she sneaks kisses on his shoulders and arms but they’re so light he doesn’t notice

Gets caught once

“That was you??”

Can’t look him in the eye for a week

She was having a one-sided conversation with Inanna and hears a strange sound behind her

It was Muriel. He laughed. Out loud. Surprised everyone including himself

One night she and Muriel get caught in the rain

Strippinggggg

They’re both a mess in the duration of peeling off their soaked clothing

She sits wrapped in a pelt in front of the fire

There’s hella firewood so Muriel has no fucking excuse to leave

Just wraps a pelt around his waist and goes about making tea

Once that’s done, he’s forced to awkwardly sit by her in front of the fire

She’s getting bold now, letting the pelt slip down her shoulders and leaning against him

Poor man almost fucking combusts

Now or never, bitch

She stutters out some dumb confession and Muriel just looks away and smiles softly “I know, Little Bear”

After that, she can’t keep her hands off him

She always at least lightly lacing their fingers when they’re near

And she kisses his face A Lot

It always flusters him without fail

Likes to hug him all the time. She’s like a koala but cuter

Eventually convinces him to take off his collar

Asra comes over for a picnic and immediately senses the difference (cue The Smirk)

She tells him about Muriel’s nickname for her and he just eats it up lmao

Teases Muriel the most

“Can I help plan the wedding? We can invite Nadi!”

Before she feeds the chickens one morning, she goes to peck Muriel on the cheek

She  m is s ed

Muriel was so red haha she just giggled and flitted away

Makes it a mission to see how riled up she can get him

He caved after 2 days when she tugged on his earlobe with her teeth

NSFW later---

I wrote this a couple of weeks ago but the discord said it was cute or whatever so here it is

[wickymicky]

sorry im dumb but in that post are u serious about not knowing ggd members or are u just trying to make a point?

a little of both unfortunately :/ i think i know most of them but i dont think i could match all their names to their faces. and again, like, this is probably because i havent looked much into them beyond the handful of music videos. i really like Ice Chu and Not That Type and i think Chococo and A Girl Like Me are pretty good, but I’m just not as into Gugudan overall as a complete thing start-to-finish as other groups. I like them more than I like WJSN at the moment (tho im feeling that start to change, i might start taking WJSN a lot more seriously lol i can feel myself maybe becoming a real fan), and while I can probably list all 13 WJSN members off the top of my head, I definitely couldnt match them all to their faces lol. that has more to do with me just seeing a lot more WJSN content on my dash than Gugudan content though, cause WJSN is a lot more active than Gugudan (if ggd doesnt have a comeback before 2019 is over… i’m gonna legit cry i would feel so bad for them). i just see WJSN’s members names written out more often i guess. 

still though, lemme try to name the 8 (9) gugudan members off the top of my head, without looking up a list

mina, sejeong, nayoung, hyeyeon, sally…. uhhh… mimi? the one with an h sounds like hani doesnt it? hana? that’s 7… fuck… one of them just had a birthday and it’s like…. hye-something? hyo-something? or am i thinking of hana/hani? 

fuck i just looked it up, i forgot soyee and the one i was thinking of is haebin. 

like, don’t take this the wrong way, none of what i’m saying is out of any sort of dislike for them lol. it’s just like… i’m a fan of some of their songs, sure, but not *enough* of a fan to watch all their appearances on shows and such, or reality shows if they have any, that kind of thing. im a fan of a ton of groups, and theres only so much time lol. and like, you know, i’ll probably keep accumulating knowledge about them and i’ll probably look back on this and laugh at myself, but you know, you dont know everything about every group you like haha. i can only name two members of Apink and like one or two members of Oh My Girl and Pristin and Girls Generation as well, cause like i just haven’t dived deeper into those groups. i like G Idle, but tbh i get everyone who isnt Soyeon and Yuqi confused. Nature? i dont really know any of them by face. but like, i didnt know every Loona member at first haha, and i didnt know every Fromis 9 member until a couple months after i started liking them (cause i dived deeper and fell way harder for them than i did initially, lol). 

i’m really new to kpop. i don’t remember the exact date, but i got into it like a week or two before Loona’s Butterfly came out. my first kpop song was Hi High, but i first heard it in late January of this year. with that in mind, the knowledge ive managed to accumulate about like 15+ groups is kind of amazing lmao, how the hell do i fit all that shit up there… is this why my memory is so bad in my day to day life? maybe lol

oh oh oh i was gonna end it there, but i forgot my point starting out, like to answer your question it was a little of both. i just explained the not-knowing thing, but also yes it was to prove a point too. in so many gugudan videos… they really focus on Sejeong, Mina, and Nayoung, such that someone like me who didnt even know what IOI was when i first watched a gugudan video, only remembered those three. well, okay, actually the first one i saw was Not That Type and Mina doesnt actually do that much in that song, but like you know in all the other songs she’s a heavy focus. that’s why Jellyfish made Gugudan SeMiNa, you know? sigh…. and like unfortunately there’s really not a ton of difference between Gugudan SeMiNa and regular Gugudan. like that’s something i wanna make sure i get across, haha, i WANT to know all the members, i WANT them all to stand out. i dont like that i dont know them all, i wish i did. i could make the effort to learn them, sure, but with some groups like Loona and Dreamcatcher, you don’t have to put in any effort of your own because they do such a good job of familiarizing you with the members just in the music videos alone, albeit in different ways haha.