#sorry this reply got so long lmao

[overlymetaromantic]

do you have any tips for starting a webcomic?

Ooh, I can try! I'm actually genuinely really passionate about webcomics as a genre so sorry if this gets a bit rambly lol:

There's no wrong way to make a comic! Webcomics in particular I feel are basically always passion projects, and you should make it in a way that makes you happy. The only way to do art "wrong" is to create in a way that actively hurts you (i.e. stretch properly, don't pin your emotional stability on strangers online, etc. lolol).

You yourself should be your #1 priority in who you are making your comic for. Your friend of choice should be #2 priority. Write what makes you laugh, put in all your favorite tropes (or your favorite subversions of those tropes), create the kind of ships you enjoy shipping in other media! Have fun! Your joy will shine through, and it's always better to let readers who resonate with your passion find you rather than attempting vice versa, aka trying to write what you think an imaginary audience might be passionate about.

When it comes to the actual process, I'd personally recommend trying to choose a story that you love but that you also feel okay giving like 75% effort to, especially if it's a first time experience. Your love will carry you through a LOT, but it has to be a project you can say, "This is good enough" to if you ever want to get anything done lmao.

Understand your personal workflow, like how long it takes you to finish a panel or a page, what parts of the process you enjoy, what parts you dislike, and what personally satisfies you as a final product. The more you understand how you work, the better you can tailor your comic in a way that supports your preferred workflow.

Webcomics by their nature take a LONG time to complete. Be prepared for that! This is one of the biggest reasons why people recommend starting small, and I'll echo that here.

I honestly don't feel qualified to speak towards how to get your comic seen because I got STUPID lucky in having others share it for me in a way that resulted in it taking off, but similar to above: Being seen takes a LONG time. Patience pays off, and your audience will find you, however big they are!

If nothing else, you being your own biggest fan means that the mere act of creation can satisfy that desire to be seen. Make the comic YOU want to read, and find joy in being able to read it because YOU made it! Like, you did it!! The fact that you made a thing that wouldn't have existed if you didn't make it is incredible!!!

With all that said, there do seem to be some ways to at least increase your chances of gaming the system of being seen. Regular updates, satisfying end points for your pages, readable panels, and an easily pitch-able concept all make you easier for people to engage with. The first comic I made got updated whenever I finished a chapter, which meant there were months in between updates; by some miracle, it still found readers, but odds are I could have snagged a few more if I'd chosen to do more frequent updates at the cost of less complete-feeling chapters. I chose to prioritize the former because I care more about having chapters that have a good plot flow, but part of why my current comic is structured the way it is, is to have more frequent, regularly scheduled updates. It can also be worth studying the platform you want to post on to see what ways they promote comics, or how readers can find new comics on their site or app!

Good luck!! Have fun!!! Webcomics are frequently solo projects, so I'll reiterate again: make what you want, for you, in whatever way that works best for you. It's all you anyway!

[panchulien]

Oliv have you watched the last voyage of the demeter?? Because I just did and Nik's actor's character was so nice and then shit happened and holy shit

YESS I HAVE like a week ago or sth oH MY GOD HI NEKRO. IM SO HAPPY ABOUT THIS INFORMATION HAHAHSH

He had... decent.. amount of screen time I guess but it was still very, very wild. I wasn't interested in it otherwise and I'm not a Dracula type of person so, I just quit after he... he. went down in flames.

I'm looking for more things to watch from him but ugh it's so hard. This dude had me searching thru old Croatian television archives I tell you. And whenever I do find something, I lose my mind because how is he that impressive. Dude knows over 5 languages, pretty as hell, sick sense of fashion, comic book nerd..... He should be more appreciated idk.

So sorry I kinda got off topic I just. Had to jump at the opportunity to talk about Stefan Kapičić because I've been losing it over him lately haha. I hope you liked The Last Voyage of The Demeter! I was surprised to see so many positive feedback of it despite not knowing shit about Dracula.

[demeterdefence]

Thinking about your "Rachel bashing og greek myths" post, methinks she believed herself to be making greek culture a favor similarly to the author of The Phantom of Manhattan, the unofficial sequel to The Phantom of the Opera

In the preface, the author begins by saying that Phantom, unlike Frankenstein or Dracula, barely made a dent in world culture until Andrew Lloyd Webber came along to make the musical, which he considers the "true" version even tho like...it wouldn't exist without the novel! He bashes Gaston Leroux and basically states that his attempt at writing failed miserably and it's like DUDE, again, the musical and your problematic sequel wouldn't even exist without it, and just because it was bigger in France than in the usa it doesn't mean it had zero impact in culture

But of COURSE unless it's usa-approved then it doesn't count and isn't worth anything *sarcasm*

PHENOMENAL point, FANTASTIC point, absolutely true and correct

i can't be a total dick and say this is an issue solely created and implemented by rachel, because we've seen non-western cultures and religions absolutely whitewashed to hell and back - like, people have been drawing jesus of the bible as white for centuries when he was a middle eastern palestinian jewish man, and good god look what the west has done to the religions of india, china, and japan. but it's the way these kinds of stories drip with a sort of smugness in removing the original culture, in depicting it as backwards and broken.

rachel wants to claim she's making a feminist retelling, but the original myth was already feminist. ancient greece didn't pretend their society was not fiercely male dominated and patriarchal, and hades stealing persephone was absolutely in line with the traditional myths - the twist is that demeter wins. demeter punishes the male gods who stole her daughter, and the ferocity of her rage and grief forces hades and zeus to give in. if persephone hadn't eaten the pomegrante seeds, she wouldn't be in the underworld at all! this is a story that is so clearly a triumph for the mothers and daughters of ancient greece, of many worlds over, because it depicted explicitly that a mother's love was more powerful than even the gods. and rachel pisses all over that.

literally even going beyond that, looking at the society that is olympus and the underworld - all the technology they use, all the innovations they have. who exactly is making these??? where exactly is the material coming from??? you can handwave away most of the inventions by saying it's magic, but we've seen demeter talk about algebra, which was invented in the ninth century by a muslim scholar from persia. in speedrunning to this so called perfect modernized world, rachel actually erases the cultural offerings and developments of dozens of other ancient worlds, and kind of just gives the credit to the underworld, which is run by a slave driver.

persephone constantly bemoans the dullness of the mortal realm, and prefers to literally lounge around doing nothing, when the mortal realm is inventing the olympic games, the democratic forum, FOOTBALL. you have thousands of things to show the gods involved in - largely because the gods were the patrons!!! why do we never see zeus looking over the olympic games??? they happen in his sanctuary!!!

like the disdain rachel has for ancient greece is insane. she can't even bother to research the food typical of the time period, seeing as she writes persephone being looked down on for being vegetarian when vegetables were a key and staple diet of ancient greece. one could argue that a vast majority of ancient greece were vegetarian by general habit. she's baking cheesecake and french desserts and having fast food and carrot cake and maybe - maybe - she'll mention baklava. the ancient greeks are FAMOUS for their art, but we sure wouldn't know that from lore olympus. the only character who even references ancient greek music is apollo, with his lyre, and that's not exactly a ringing endorsement.

and this is not to say that an adaption has to follow the ancient text to a t - that's just not feasible and no one is expected to do so. but there's really something to how rachel does dismiss or ignore the canonical importance of so many of these stories to replace them with a western interpretation. even the therapy speak is grating. in episode 227, when persephone is talking about the concept of virginity, she's absolutely correct in pointing out how that's largely a social construct - but in light of the world she lives in and the world she helps control, the same idea could have been reached through means other than americanized psych talk.

so often, people will look back at the ancient world and think we are morally superior because we do not have the same views, or we have seemingly "developed." that is a view i abhor, because it removes the very act of learning and developing and understanding. rachel really talked big about how removing the incest of ancient greece made the story better, but incidentally, she managed to also take out the feminism, and literally the entire lgbt culture of ancient greece. apollo was even considered the patron of homosexuality! he was called to bless same-sex unions! zeus had DOZENS of male lovers; ares, hephestus, and hermes had known male relationships, and several of the ancient heroes and gods of greek mythology were described in terms we would refer to as transgender in modern times.

if rachel had gone "i'm writing a love story that's originally inspired by the myth of persephone and hades but it's very much modern and removed from the myths" that would be one thing, and i would not be bristling at that; myths have inspired countless stories over the centuries and will continue to do so for centuries to come. the problem is rachel wants to claim a rooting in these myths with zero understanding of how they work or why they work, and absolutely lets her contempt for the ancients shine through in every single aspect of her comic. it's gross and it's petty and she deserves none of the self-appointed "mythology expert" she's given herself.

[deepseawave]

obsessed w the tags on ur last reblog

Omgg, thank you haha, it was a quality post so I just had to appreciate it in full force 😂❤️

Can‘t believe someone would actually enjoy my yapping :,D

[kingofanemptyworld]

Hope your end of year has been lovely, so far! I can personally say that I gravitated towards your inbox because your responses to people’s asks are very friendly and chatty, you have such nice responses about your fandom takes. (Also, that was after I followed your blog, for your Pokémon x Wind Breaker AU posts). Fandom is what a person makes of it and you make the fandom brighter, imo. (I hope that wasn’t weird, I just like chatting with you about wind breaker).

Today I ask you about your favorite characters and what you like about them? My personal favorites in Wind Breaker are Tsubaki and Suo. I absolutely love the entirety of Tsubaki’s backstory, as I’ve mentioned before in another ask, and I love how he’s just so unapologetically himself despite the difficulties he faced in his past. His character is the definition of coming to love oneself and as someone who has read all kinds of shounen for years, Tsubaki’s character arc and how Nii-sensei handled it cemented Wind Breaker as one of my top 10 series of all time. Nii-sensei broke so many shounen tropes with Wind Breaker, but Tsubaki’s character arc definitely left me in awe.

I also saw in your recent posts that you’re a fan of Fire Emblem! Any faves from that, or particularly games? I got Engage as a gift but haven’t gotten to play it yet; I did play Fates, Awakening, and Three Houses though! (My all time favorite best boy is Ashe from 3H. He is the sweetest best boy.)

sincerely, Wind Breaker Anon

(wow that was longer than intended, sorry 😅)

wind breaker anon, hi!! my end of year has been very nice so far, and I hope the same is true for you!!

one, so happy to hear you came for the Pokemon AU and stayed for my nonsense. two, I do try to be kind in my replies, even when I don’t agree with the person. like, I’m respectful so long as the other person is, too, y’know? fair’s fair, and all that. three, I am FLATTERED that you think I make the fandom brighter, that is literally the nicest thing I’ve ever heard 💙💙💙 please know you definitely make my fandom experience brighter, too, it honestly makes my day when I see I got an ask from you.

as for favorite characters, I have a three-way tie for first: Sakura, Togame, and Tsubaki! Tsubaki actually because of really similar reasons to yours. He’s such a breath of fresh air in the shounen genre, and I am so, so happy with how he’s developed as a character and his interactions with the rest of the cast. also his character design is so stinkin’ pretty, i adore his hairstyle and the girls’ furin uniform he I guess made himself? also like. this is just a me thing. I like that he’s tall and broad-shouldered. usually if you have a feminine-presenting guy in anime they’re short and skinny and really just. androgynous? so I think a lot of people irl don’t relate to them, whereas tsubaki absolutely has more traditionally masculine features and still happily dresses as he does. I think that’s neat

Togame is… i just like him a lot 😅 he’s entertaining as an antagonist, then just delightful when he comes back as an ally. his devotion to choji is so inspiring, and i love the extra bits we’ve learned about him from nii-sensei’s notes. like he’s just an old man in a young body and he’s great.

I think sakura I’ve talked enough about lmao. He’s a wonderful MC, stellar design, great development. he’s a tsundere. what more could I ask for?

omg you’re a fire emblem fan too!!! hell yeah!! I got into fire emblem when awakening came out (previously my only exposure to the games was Super Smash Bros. and I really liked Ike for whatever reason) and just. fell head over heels for the game mechanics and the characters. I’ve played everything that’s come out since then (fates, three houses, warriors, three hopes, engage, and the mobile game heroes because I’m insane). asking me to pick favorites for that is… hard. like my forever favorites are probably Chrom, Lon’qu, Cordelia, Frederick, Lucina, Morgan, Inigo (Awakening), Silas, Jakob, Azura (Fates), Dimitri, Claude, Sylvain, Petra, Dorothea, Hilda, Ashe (Three Houses) and Diamant (Engage).

Also! huge fan of the protag characters, Robin, Corrin, Byleth, and Alear. Awakening is near and dear to my heart, and as much as I love Three Houses it’s probably my favorite game. I’ll never forget the way I felt when the ending cut scene with Chrom and Lissa played for the first time, god, I was a mess

Which is. Way more than you asked for. But if you get me talking about fire emblem I will literally never stop, sorry about that

[mobius-m-mobius]

Hello there!

I have to ask cause it's everywhere and apparently my husband and I didn't see it!

Aziraphale & Crowley were obvious to us as a couple but we didn't see this with Loki & Mobius (please people don't be mad 🙃). I saw a great love and a bond that will last forever but not the way we witnessed in Good Omens. To me it was more of a family thing. Like Mobius has two sons. Could be the representation of Thor and Loki. I don't know. I was so surprised when I saw all this on Tumblr. I want to rewatch the show now to see if I really missed all the signs.

Hi there! 😊 Thank you for the ask and please don't worry for wondering, part of the joy in a watching experience is being able to see something in a completely new light. I hope you've come to the right place as Lokius and Aziraphale/Crowley are the only romantic pairings that have stood out to me in ages but now for fairly different reasons so I'll do my best to explain why in my own personal view Lokius is a slow burn for the ages above and beyond all other love stories to me and I'd absolutely recommend rewatching Loki, especially season 2, with the mindset that the tropes of every good romance are present in *every* interaction Loki and Mobius have.

(adding a read more here as I feel this is about to get almost horrifically long if you'd like to know even some of the signs lol)

Right from the start we see Mobius recounting being a fan of Loki's most mischievous acts on the timeline, pushing the question of just why he's focused on ruling and nothing else, really getting under his skin in a way no one ever has before?? And in that there's something even better and deeper than love at first sight; intrigue. Loki's furious at being held by the TVA but can't help being drawn back to what an enigma Mobius is to brush off his insults and offer salvation in the face of knowing every good or bad thing Loki's ever done and believing in him anyway.

Cue the tentative partnership and rapport they both get far too comfortable in which you see when Mobius indulges in letting Loki ruin the mission at the renaissance fair and later tries to backtrack in reassuring Ravonna he's got things under control, then again when Loki realizes Mobius has been reading him too well and defaults to leaning in to "fix" his perfectly tied tie, a callback to when Mobius pointed out Loki has a tendency to try and seduce people in more powerful positions who could help him. You actually see Mobius lean in for a moment before realizing himself and pulling back, but contrary to everyone else Loki's tried this with he doesn't give in or get angry, he laughs and once again points out what Loki's up to, trying to find a way to get to the Timekeepers.

That entire sequence is the tipping point for me when they officially enter romantic territory, as Loki's visibly thrown and surprised by the way Mobius reacts and scrambles after him, finally taking things seriously enough to do real work and is rewarded not only with trust he's never been given so freely before but a now mutual fascination you see during their conversation in the cafeteria (a highlight of the series for me ) when Loki can't help but try and learn more about the person who knows him so well already by asking genuinely about Mobius and his jet ski magazine. Blew me away because any previous version of Loki would've never taken the time or interest in something so ridiculous (in his eyes), but this Loki shyly takes in the way Mobius beams and opens up, because how could you not fall a little when such a simple pleasure makes someone happy?

Then when they research Roxxcart they flirt again, Mobius praising Loki and teasing he might take his job before what we refer to as the Roxxcart grocery store divorce and for good reason 😂 When Loki's captured back to the TVA, Mobius isn't just hurt, he's clearly jealous and *extremely* so because he thought *they* had been building something only to now think Loki played him all along and during Loki's next interrogation Mobius loses his temper in a way he never has before, making scathing comments about Loki stabbing him in the back and siding with his "girlfriend" which should kind of speak for itself there 😅 Then their mutual assurance of trust before Mobius is pruned and the hug in the void being initiated by Loki is huge as well when this is the first time he's shared EVER that with someone and you see the crushing despair when Mobius later no longer remembers.

Getting into s2, it's easier for me to sum up with the base of their s1 relationship laid out since there's no need to get into as much detail when the entire thing is pure romance start to finish.

Loki and Mobius frantically desperate to find each other when in reality they had been separated for maybe an hour? Mobius ignoring all other issues at hand and his superiors to gently hold Loki by the waist and pull him close, constantly grounding by touching his back, arms, anywhere to provide extra comfort and Loki giving him that control, Mobius spending the entire season actively trying to enjoy being on the field without limits for a change and organizing dates between the two of them all season when his focus used to primarily be on the work. He repeatedly asks Loki to go for a drink, suggests visiting the theatre, going on a hot air balloon ride, etc, while Loki stops to indulge in popcorn and pies just because small joys are important to Mobius. When Loki visits Mobius' original timeline self they spend the ENTIRE ep flirting with each other, and honestly Don having two kids is just as it seems since there were no official indications otherwise; he may share genes with Mobius but is a different person with a different life. Don can't stop bringing up how single he is, teases Loki about following him home, which Loki absolutely did but only after fixing his hair and coat to try and look as good as possible before seeing him (because again, he looks like Mobius) and getting so flustered stammering over his words he may as well have been in a 90s Hugh Grant rom com 😂😂

Don't even get me started on the finale, which has every character except Loki and Mobius basically living their ideal life while the two of them are clearly left unfulfilled and wanting, missing each other to the point Mobius leaves the TVA (which exists out of time) for a timeline that Loki can see as a tear rolls down Loki's face in the final scene because of it.

Do I think that had their characters been tied to anyone but the Disney/Marvel corporations they, like Aziraphale and Crowley, would've shared a kiss as well? Absolutely yes, but that isn't a necessity for me personally and in all honesty despite Aziraphale and Crowley having kissed I actually felt season 2 of Good Omens was a massive backtrack for their relationship compared to the quality of time they spent together in season 1 which I much preferred. Again, that's personal preference and everyone sees and interprets elements of romance differently which is completely fine and I hope this wild ramble at least gave some perspective on how I and many others view Lokius 😂💖 Happy watching, no matter how you end up viewing them, and thank you again for the ask!

[fala-alfredo-pasta]

On the topic of Nagito resenting Izuru, I actually think it could go beyond that. Something that I'm not totally convinced about is none of Class 77 having any hard feelings towards Hajime. While them loving him inside the simulation makes perfect sense, would that really carry over smoothly once they were back out? Because his actions led to both them being brainwashed and for their deprogramming session being sabotaged in the first place. And to add insult to injury, he can take some solace in feeling less "tainted" than they are. Izuru had more autonomy and self-control during the Tragedy, while they were reduced to vicious idiots acting on whatever violent impulse came to them. Like with Sonia, she has to live with being known to the world as the tyrant queen who brought her homeland to ruin (though I personally like to headcanon that Novoselic is recovering). Meanwhile for the few people who are aware of a 15th Remnant, Hajime is "that one other dude with the long hair that we're not even sure killed that many people". I mean if I came out of the NWP with all that mental (and possibly physical) baggage, and the dude in our group who was most responsible for the rest of us becoming so fucked up was conversely the least guilty of us AND got handed a thousand super-talents...well I think I'd be a wee bit resentful and jealous. And going back to Nagito, it also seems a bit unrealistic to me that in most fanfics there doesn't seem to be any resistance from him to accepting medical aid from Hajime. Or dismay at discovering it was done while he was in a coma. Because on top of him probably not feeling like he'd want to prolong his life, accepting that kind of aid from the former Izuru would probably feel kind of infantilizing to be honest. Dude gets handed everything you ever wanted including a better version of your luck, he betrays Hope's Peak because he's bored, does absolutely nothing while someone dear to you is murdered and you and your classmates get brainwashed, sets things up so that your attempted suicide will actually result in you getting possessed by your nemesis...and now you're just meant to let him assert the power of a doctor over you and welcome him as your savior? I just think there'd probably need to be a moment where Nagito is convinced to accept treatment, rather than it being done to him without his consent. Make him feel assured that he has agency and control over his own body, and that continuing to live was his own choice. Because otherwise I think it could get really nasty. " I don't care that you're the most talented man alive. Even if I'd wanted to live, you, of all people on this planet, YOU are the last human being on Earth that I would want help from."

Ooo this be a spicy take! But some very good points! First off, sorry for taking so long to reply to this question it just this got me back into my Dangan theorist mode, and I wanted to replay all of Chapter 0/6 as well as read a summary of Zero in order to re-examine how the game and novel present Izuru Kamukura.

I’ll try my best not to derail this because Izuru’s whole existence and backstory is just…..such a brain worm for me that I can speculate on for hours. There’s just so much we don’t truly know if we’re basing this solely on the games (which I usually prefer to do seeing as the anime is filled with contradictions). But, doing so would mean having to excuse his involvement (or lack of) in preventing Chiaki’s murder and class 77’s brainwashing since there’s nothing within the games that indicates such things happening since even within game it flat out states Junko manipulated her high power connections (ie: the Ultimates), one by one and not in a batch.

She really only used video footage of explicit killing to manipulate the Reserve Course into rioting (Dr0), the rest of the world into more despair (Dr1) and as a way to taunt the Future Foundation (SDR2). Hell, technically, there is no proof that Chiaki actually existed in real life if we’re going only by the games too. That was something canonized by the anime.

Well okay. There may be ONE thing in the second game that can potentially confirm Chiaki’s existence in the real world and that’s her presence being listed in the book Nagito got with everyone's info. However, this was given to him by Monokuma and Nagito did destroy any of the information regarding his classmates time in and out of  school that could have very well revealed that Chiaki wasn’t ever there—but I digress and this aint about Chiaki rn this is about Izuru.

What we do know of him through the game is that he sees himself as being used by Junko and thus brought in a flash drive with her AI to insert into the Neo World Program as a virus so he could use her instead. This feels contradictory though, if the end result would be Junko taking over all their bodies. You can’t even argue that he did it so Hajime could override his present self and come back because that would have happened regardless (that was literally what was SUPPOSED to happen). So then why bring Junko back? How was he using her in that regard? Well, the only thing I can think of is that he pretty much already knew how it was all going to end, and that creating a killing game was the only way to ensure everyone stayed alive whilst retaining their old memories thus decreasing the chance of them falling back into Ultimate Despair when re-awakened and in a way saying “fuck you” to Junko’s despair and destroying the last remnants of her both in name and digitally.

Cool beans. He still lied to them all though. Junko states that each of them willingly went into the program knowing well that her virus was going to force them into a killing game to cause despair. Izuru, though, didn’t tell them his whole plan or how it was truly going to end, otherwise no one would have joined. And that’s not necessarily bad–he was doing it for their own good! Except, well, there’s not conclusive proof that he did so for their sake (and since we don’t know if Chiaki existed irl we don’t know if he did this for her). Also given how indifferent he is in-game, the fact that his surgery left him emotionally distant, and his lack of connection with class 77, well it’d be easier to believe that Izuru did this all purely out of self interest in a way to get “revenge” at Junko and perhaps alleviate his boredom.

Now, present Hajime WOULD have an emotional investment in class 77 and it’s that reason he sticks around to help them recover. But, honestly, I agree that the ex-remnants would take some time to come around to fully trusting him again because remember: they ARE still recovering from despair. It would not be surprising if their residual remnant emotions feel betrayed by him for lying to them and essentially killing off Junko for good. Add in their in-game memories conflicting with their past memories every time they see Hajime and he’s not quite the same Hajime they befriended thus reminding them that he’s also  that guy who just randomly showed up one day then manipulated them into a scheme for seemingly his own self interest, yeeeah it might take them a while before being buddy buddy with him.

Though they will eventually, but let’s focus on Nagito for a bit because he’d be the absolute last person to come around in fully trusting Hajime/Izuru. Because you see, while it was stated that the remnants agreed to be part of the killing game, we know for a fact that not ALL of them did so. And we know this because of chapter 0. In it, we see Nagito meeting Izuru for the first time (as Nagito literally says he’s never seen Izuru before), thus Izuru has not been in contact with Nagito to inform him of the plan (which actually brings into question WHY Nagito is even there/agreed to re-programming but that’s a theory for another day). We also see Nagito being very confused about Izuru’s talking about his flash drive with Junko’s AI in it. And, although he doesn’t fully understand what Izuru is planning, what he takes from it is that he’ll be able to see Junko again and get the chance of killing her himself. Izuru does not correct him or inform him of anything else. Meaning, Nagito knows absolutely nothing of the killing game he unknowingly signed up for nor of the possibility of his body being taken over by Junko.

In other words: NAGITO DID NOT CONSENT TO THIS AT ALL.

Unlike his classmates who can forgive Hajime’s actions as Izuru because yeah technically they DID agree to it, Nagito was not even informed much less had the option to say yes. You can argue that Izuru did so intentionally knowing that Nagito’s strange half-remnant state and intense resentment towards despair and Junko would have made him too much of a risk to the plan that is was better to leave him in the dark, but it still doesn’t change the fact that Nagito didn’t get a choice. Add in our previous discussion of why Nagito would be resentful towards Izuru because of all his gifted talents along with this and I’d say yeah, Nagito wouldn’t be all that welcoming toward accepting Hajime’s help post game.

This doesn’t even add in your note on pro-longing his life without his input or anything from the anime, so if Chiaki’s death was actually used as a trigger for class 77 and Izuru could have done something about it–YEAH that’s going to make the resentment exponentially worse.

So your last tidbit of Nagito getting a chance to decide something for himself just hits so strongly given he never got the chance to do so before. It’s the least he deserves now.

[youloveamonsterlikeme]

Hey Sal, i think i found something of yours.. It's a photo. *hands you an old photo of your mom. There's a handwritten note on the back of it.*

it reads, "Henry, you are my sunshine in the darkness. I can't believe we're going to have a little boy! I'm so unbelievably happy! Everything is perfect! Love you always, Diane."

@jaxx-with-an-axe

He looks at it with confusion, reading the note on the back a few times before looking back at Jaxx with a hint of suspicion in his eyes. "This is... a really personal find, Jaxx. Where did you find it?"

@jaxx-with-an-axe

[linolinoing]

🎶✨when u get this, list 5 songs u like to listen to, publish. then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (positivity is cool)🎶✨

Hiiiiii! THANK YOU JESS, SA AND LISSA FOR SENDING THIS 🫂💘💕💖💝💗💓 @chanrizard @minho-knows

I'm the most indecisive person in the world, so I'll try not to overthink it too much and just say whatever comes to mind!

might be the best song ever created? at least it is in my world. dijon music is *chef's kiss* 🤌🏻

or tbh any song from red moon in venus, the whole album is a masterpiece

it rained a bit yesterday, so I'm already in a slightly autumnal mood lmao

randomly heard this song a few days ago and now I'm obsessed

decided not to add any skz cus everyone already knows how obsessed we all are with them, but listening to slash is a part of my daily routine rn 🖤

[guardian-angle22]

Much as I would love to see a Muslim/hijabi woman on tv. Most likely wouldn't want to be on tv since it goes against their beliefs. I'm ok with Natacha in this role bc I love her and I appreciate what LS has done with showing respect as the show has continued

[response to my post here]

First off, thank you for the insight/feedback on the accuracy, and the prayer part in particular! I had thought the location she was praying in was inaccurate but that wasn’t something I saw mentioned a lot at the time of the initial backlash to that scene. So I appreciate the information. 💜

I definitely head canon that when Owen rebuilt the firehouse (for the 2nd time!) he made sure there was a dedicated quiet room. Not only would it be important to have for Marjan or anyone else that works at the firehouse with them of Muslim faith to pray in, but also they have stressful and emotional jobs! Having a dedicated safe space at the firehouse to go when you need that kind of quiet privacy just makes sense to me.

As far as the casting part first: I think Natacha has done a great job and I appreciate the fact that she spoke up to the showrunners after hearing feedback from Muslim viewers. and from what I heard of her talking at the most recent convention, she has some great ideas of exploring various intersectionality that is found within that religion and I think that’s great and really hope they do explore some of those things.

My desire for an actual hijabi woman to have been chosen for this part was mainly based off experiences I witnessed from a previous fandom, Skam. IDK if you ever watched it, but the 4th season focused on a Muslim girl in high school, Sana, played by an actress who was actually Muslim, Iman Meskini, who was fantastic. The show writer/creator/producer relied a lot on her knowledge and lived experience when filming things. Then the Skam remakes happened… and another iteration of the show did not bother to get an actual Muslim to play that character and I remember very vividly the negative experiences a lot of the Muslim people in fandom had based off choices that were made and how that character was portrayed. Iman herself spoke up about how much better it was to have someone with the lived experience, who knew what it was like, acting in a role like that. I love this quote from her too: "I never dreamt about being an actress, because I never saw an actress with hijab on. I didn’t even see it as an option or a possibility at all until I became that example that it is possible."

I definitely can appreciate and understand how nuanced the discussion of actors playing parts that aren’t their own experience truly is though. I think the wars that are waged online about actors who play queer parts especially is a big thing happening in culture right now and I truly understand a lot of varying sides to those kinds of discussions. I know it might not always be possible for own voices actors to play parts like this, but I just feel like the best case scenario in a role like Marjan would have been for it to be played by a hijabi woman. That doesn’t mean I think Natacha is in the wrong for taking the role or that it was a terrible mistake for her to have been cast. Just that there was a better scenario that I had hoped for, that didn’t end up happening. and that's okay.

Now the corn silo story: That interview with Natacha where she said there were things that got cut from that storyline makes me really sad because I wish we could have gotten a better resolution to it. Maybe it would have been exactly what you're mentioning here too - clarifying for the viewers that not everyone in the mosque felt that way and it was just pettiness amongst some of them. Sadly, I guess we'll never know exactly what that would have looked like. It makes me a little sad that the only time we've even seen the mosque she goes to was in that episode in season one. I really really hope we get a chance to see some more storylines for Marjan that can include her faith and her mosque but more of how they're positively impacting her life instead.

(I don't have any relevant Marjan reaction gifs since I mainly use my fave Paul, so have this gif of her being absolutely adorable instead)

[incorrecthuntingdogs]

@assface-berlioz

Sorry to everyone for turning this into a separate post, it got a bit too long, I've been enabled to ramble lol-

The first one is actually a crossover AU with Devil from a foreign land, where Dazai is Sorato, Jouno Garan and Fyodor Kiyora. I don't know how many people here know this manga but it's basically a royality/childhood friends AU where Jouno is a son to a royal family, Fyodor his fiancé, and Dazai a servant Jouno picked up after he found him unconscious on the family estate. Despite the hierarchical difference they're essentially friends like normal children, even though Jouno's father doesn't approve of his friendship with either of them (it's secondary but the father would be Fukuchi, it might not fit his dynamic with Fyodor but I live for chapter 92/93 angst okay). Jouno is just trying to keep the whole thing together while having to watch Dazai get punished for their friendship and everything, until he finds out that he has been lying to him (letting him win during their sparring sessions, and being... a lot closer to Fyodor than he thought, or he is himself) and essentially that's when everything falls apart.

The second one is technically diving into headcanon territory; it is the backstory I use for them in my fanworks, the reason I treat it as AU rather than hc is because it's more wishful thinking than something I feel like would be canon, lol.

Anyway, they grew up in an orphanage together, basically an institution for children with dangerous or rare abilities. (Jouno is the only one who actually lost his parents; Dazai and Fyodor were dumped there, Fyodor for religious reasons, Dazai for the sake of his safety). In addition to being abandoned, they had to withstand the director's attempts to "cleanse" them from their abilities, essentially torture them (which is also how Jouno lost his sight, but that's secondary), so they bonded over their pain and the fact that they simply didn't have anyone else. They actually used to be quite good friends, spending all their free time together, until they left one by one.

Bonus: An example of the fanworks I was talking about, because I got carried away. I'm sorry.

[overlymetaromantic]

hi! im not quite sure my question will make sense, but how do you determine which scene to draw in correlation with the dialogue? For example, if there are multiple text bubbles on a page with only one accompanied drawing which dialogue to do choose to represent the characters saying?

I hope that makes sense, I am currently working on my own comic which is pretty dialogue heavy and noticed your comic flows very smoothly with the dialogue! Just looking for some advice^^

Oooh that's a fun question!! I can definitely try to give some advice—I can fully admit I'm by no means a professional and make a lot of my own mistakes, but I'm happy to hear that my dialogue usually flows well, especially considering how wordy I can get!! 😂

I have to admit, a lot of my choices in scenes relies heavily on instinct, but my primary goal with everything is to be as economical as possible. There are SEVERAL instances where I could have drawn more panels per dialogue, but since my personal priority is keeping my panel counts under control, I end up with more dialogue per panel instead. Based on that, I tend to look for compositions or expressions that can match with multiple lines of dialogue; so for instance, if there's a conversation in which a character's emotional state remains steady throughout, I don't need as many panels to show their face, since there's no new information to be gained.

It might be helpful to remember that people are specifically reading your drawings in a comic! It's therefore similar advice to writing in that sense—if something is redundant or unnecessary in that it doesn't add anything to the text, cut it. Otherwise, it tends to be a matter of answering the question of what's most important for the reader to see. Does the character's expression matter, or does just the dialogue convey enough? Who is the most important character or detail in this scene? Can the reader tell who's speaking without a new panel to show the speaker? What needs to be conveyed so that the reader isn't confused? Or the flip side—what can be cut without disrupting the reader's comprehension of the scene?

Aside from that, my biggest piece of advice is page flow! I can freely admit I cram a LOT per page for MBNSSB, and I know it doesn't always flow as well as I hoped it would, but I promise page flow is always at the forefront of my mind 😂 The idea is to lay out your art/dialogue in a way that naturally draws the reader's eye in the direction you want them to read the page—in Western comics, that's usually left to right, in manga it's right to left, and in Webtoons it's top to bottom, etc. I usually rely on the height of the speech bubbles and the direction of the tails to help guide the flow of the page, but there's a lot of fiddling that can be done with this. Here are a couple of different comic pages I've drawn and my intended reading flow of them, if the visual examples helps at all!

In each instance, the goal is the use both the art and the speech bubbles to guide how the reader is looking at the page—a speech bubble leads to the art, which leads to the next speech bubble, which moves back to the art, etc. There are a lot more theories that have to do with composition that I am NOT qualified to lecture about lol, but for me it's a similar instinct to deciding what needs to be drawn in the first place. Every panel is doing double duty in that sense: first, it's answering the questions of who/what/where/why/how, aka information the reader needs to know for the story; and second, it's pointing them in the direction of where to read next through visual cues, like a character looking in that direction, a speech bubble placed so that you look at it right after the art, the flow of the lines in your art that curve your eye towards the next panel, etc.

I hope that rambling made sense and at least answered part of your question! And sorry if I misunderstood anything you were asking for—I can admit I get very excited about these kind of technical details and am definitely prone to spiraling off into them as seen here lolol 😂

[todayisafridaynight]

SO!

Pretty good show honestly. I think it may perhaps come off a little underwhelming compared to last time because they released the full trailers early, so it was chiefly just talking, but I was still pleased.

The only thing I really wanted out of it was one (1) of my predictions coming true and one (1) surprise, and well, between the Watase Family and Nishitani...... THREE!!!!!, that's exactly what I got. Kiryu looking up at the sky like he's struggling to remember who he (allegedly) proposed to is hilarious though same energy as Jo not remembering Ikumi's name ghdshgkdhf the exchange kind of reminded me of Ichi talking to Arakawa as well... the "don't say it in the past tense" one you know the one...

Also next summit in September so that'll be a lovely birthday present :) For Me :)

Also x2 I love seeing which of my asks you decide to reblog. Whether it's because of the actual ask or because of my commentary it always feels like a win (<- normal to want and possible to achieve)

even if Considerably underwhelming, what information's been given IS causin a lotta buzz right now so !!! pretty successful summit in some regards ( ❁´◡`❁;;)

i just wish we got to see LAD8 gameplay, that's probably the only thing i really wanted but i guess there is still the fall summit (and for your birthday's sake i hope it's a real banger one)!

[lannisterdaddyissues]

you’re too niceys to me lol,, I do love steins;gate but have tragically never watched season 2 bc Kurisu not being there was too </3 (I have watched the movie and ovas though so that’s something)

ACH THIS HAS BEEN IN MY INBOX FOR 3 WEEKS KAP IM SO SORRYYYY

but it’s not being niceys when i know for a fact that u have excellent taste as a fellow DA enjoyer!! trust me when i say i handpick my mutuals for their good taste and ur at the top of the list <3

also re: steins;gate 0. i can only say that while i did thoroughly enjoy it, i enjoyed it BECAUSE it was depressing (which is not something i often find myself saying about media lmao)! while the writing in it does take a drop in quality compared to the og anime, s;g0 handles the themes of coping with loss and dealing with trauma incredibly well, possibly better than any show i’ve ever watched. honestly, i was watching it more for the grief and mourning narrative than i was for the actual steins;gate narrative lol.

ofc it’s not for everyone, especially people who don’t generally enjoy sad stories or major character death as a rule, but it was definitely a meaningful watch for me.

…though at the same time i can’t blame you at all for not watching it, bc i still haven’t watched a single episode of death note after the one where L dies 💀

[an-android-child]

¡JAJA! YOU HAVE ACTIVATED MY AUTISM TRAP CARD

SPECIAL INTEREST

SO, first let's get to Dick Grayson and Bruce Wayne's clusterfuck of a relationship.

As everyone will tell you, comic's canon is like gender: a social construct. If anyone tries to tell you there's a main canon they're lying to you. It's true that the comics TRY to market it as such, and we've been through so many reboots and continuities that I believe the present default is, literally, that everything is canon, depending on what the writer or story calls for. Which is as confusing as it sounds, and has been regarded as, possibly, the move of all time.

And I want to make it explicitly clear that I am not taking Elseworlds (official dc aus for their ocs, like Batman being a pirate and shit like that) into account. This is literally all "main continuity" in all its rebooted as shit glory. I'll specify what continuity I mean, but basically know that every once in a while DC has the compulsive need to kill off their entire character universe and start it all again "from the beginning", except it's literally never that because half of this reboots need the reader to know the characters already, so what's the point, and that they tend to just make everything worse and deliver the most dumb possible comic events in history, with few exceptions. But that's a personal opinion and it literally doesn't matter.

At the end of the day, here's the thing. There are... A shit ton of interpretations about their relationship, because it literally varies from writer to writer. No, I'm not kidding.

Let's start from the beginning. Literally.

First Main Universe

Detective Comics (1937) #38

Writer: Bill Finger

The first appearance of Dick Grayson is hilarious because it doesn't mention any legal procedure regarding anything related to the fact that Dick's an orphan now. Batman sees a traumatized child and thinks "is anybody gonna kidnap that" and doesn't wait for an answer. There's no real label for their relationship either, aside from the cover's vague remark of "taken under his mantle", and literally those two panels where it implies that Dick will be working with Bruce as an aide or something. Or better said, that they will be going on adventures together lmao. I mean, I guess.

Also unrelated but I love the fact that Bruce caves like a wet paper towel for his kids so much, even at the beginning. No, you can't be a crime fighter vigilante, wait no no don't look at me like that here I'll train you for months here's my secret identity and all my money please come live at my very big and lonely mansion

Detective Comics (1937) # 39 & #43 & #47

Writer: Bill Finger

So yeah, for a while, the og Batman writer basically referred to Dick as an aide. Whatever that means. Unpaid internship go brrrrrrrr.

Detective Comics (1937) #40

Writer: Bill Finger

But even from the beginning, it was obvious that their relationship was special and that they cared for each other. Hell, Dick was the first person to ever know Batman's secret identity. That's a huge ass deal. Not even his fiancé knew. Before Alfred even existed, Dick Grayson was already living in that house lmao.

Detective Comics (1937) #41

Writer: Bill Finger

The FIRST ever mention of any type of legal relationship between them is this off-hand comment made when they're trying to infiltrate a boarding school to find some killer I can't remember the name of. I place some legitimacy in it because they're literally going as Bruce Wayne and Dick Grayson, no disguises. When did Bruce do the paperwork for this? When did the trial take place? Who knows! It will be explained. Later. Somewhat. Don't think about it.

As time progressed, the relationship became more explicitly parental. You could argue this was because of the controversy, but whatever it may be for, Bruce doesn't shy away from telling/showing Dick how much he loves him. He also does it when he thinks no one's paying much attention to him lol

Batman (1940) #20 (this issue is very cute)

Writer: Bill Finger

Batman (1940) #66

Writer: Bill Finger

Sometimes though, he would insist they were just the best of friends.

Detective Comics (1937) #166

Writer: Don C. Cameron (i'm not sure if it's really him, but i can't find any other sources claiming any other writer, and it kinda seems like his writing style)

Ironically, Dick seems to be the one to insist they're just good friends the most, which I find an interesting choice.

Batman (1940) #3 & #20 & #118

Writer: Bill Finger

Except... When he doesn't.

Batman (1940) #57

Writer: Bill Finger

Batman (1940) #339

Writer: Gerry Conway

Either way, don't be fooled. No matter what, this little guy cares.

Batman (1940) #13 (in this story Bruce is just pulling off a ruse with a dummy so Dick doesn't get killed, but instead of telling him he leaves the house lmao. Also, oh, the irony)

Writer: Bill Finger

The general consensus though, if there's anything like that in a world as cruel as this one, is that Dick was never formally adopted, just taken in as a ward. This was because, in the 40's, single men couldn't adopt even if they wanted to, so that was the next best thing. But that's another entire can of worms.

So yeah, Dick was never really adopte-

Detective Comics (1937) #145

Writer: Don C. Cameron (again, I can't be sure, but the comic references two other issues written by him, and I'll eat my left shoe if it's anyone else)

Yeah let's just. Let's just move on.

Second Main Universe

In the second universe, things start getting messy. Writers have decided angst is what they want, and their relationship becomes way more rocky. They fight, Dick becomes Nightwing, Bruce gets his back broken, Jason fucking dies, not in that order. Y'know the drill. The focus on father and son shifts, but let's start with the basics.

For some context, in this universe Dick isn't adopted, but Bruce is his legal guardian.

The Untold Legend of the Batman (1980) #2

Writer: Len Wein

So yeah, Dick isn't adopte-

Robin (1993) #0 (thank you so much @northoftheroad for helping me find this instance!!! there are way too many comics sometimes lmaoo. i recommend her blog so much, and she specializes in Dick's whole comic history)

Writer: Chuck Dixon

Ignore that.

He's just a ward-

Robin (1993) Annual #4

Writer: Chuck Dixon (IS HE ADOPTED OR NOT DIXON)

Ignore that.

I meant foster chil-

Batman: Legends of the Dark Knight (1989) #100

Writer: Dennis O'Neil

Fuck.

Look. This is a mess, we both know it. Let's pretend consistency is a thing that exists and that DC gives a shit about it.

In the second universe, Dick ISN'T adopted, and doesn't care much that he hasn't bee-

Tales of the Teen Titans (1984) #50

Writers: Marv Wolfman & George Pérez

I actually meant that he cares and wants to be Bruce's so-

Batman (1940) #439

Writer: Marv Wolfman

I mean, he was a child when he said that! Character development I guess! In a way! It's the same author. I don't understand the point of the conversation at the wedding if Dick literally asked him not to. I can get behind tha-

Secret Origins (1986) #13 (thank you so much @tiffanybluesclues for helping me find this instance!!! they have this super fricking cool meta i can't recoomend enough if you want to see more clearly for yourself what Bruce's and Dick's whole deal is about lmao)

Writer: Dan Mishkin

Okay this is getting ridic-

Batman (1940) #217

Writer: Frank Robbins

YEAH. WHY NOT

DID I MENTION THAT THIS UNIVERSE TRIES FOR THE BROTHER ANGLE. Except when it doesn't.

In the First Universe we had the best friends angle, now we have the brother one. They want to keep Bruce young so bad, even at the cost of consistency.

Robin (1993) Annual #4

Writer: Chuck Dixon

And also the best friend angle. Again. Because of course we do.

All this mess is just the first two universes and I'm leaving so many details out. Jesus Fuck.

Third Main Universe

The universe I was referencing, the one where Dick is adopted by Bruce as an adult, is the third main continuity. From one of my favourite comic writers (who was done so dirty, and I'll never forgive some fans for how they treat her, or DC editorial for not letting her finish her Nightwing story properly).

Batman: Gotham Knights (2000) #17 (this issue was released in 2001)

Writer: Devin Grayson (my beloved)

You'd think this would be a pivotal moment for their relationship, in the sense that it would shape how other authors wrote them from then on. As times have changed, the focus on a much more character driven story has been the cause for many changes in DC comics. One of the reasons the Second Universe was so full of angst (not as much as people make it out to be, but way more than we were used to), was precisely that fact. And now, in the present, one could argue the focus is still there, perhaps even more so. You'd think this would mark the end of an era, the beginning of another. You'd be correct, in literally any other circumstance.

But this is DC.

52 (2006) #30 (this issue was released in 2007)

Writers: Geoff Johns & Grant Morrison & Greg Rucka & Mark Waid

Batman and Robin (2009) #7 (this issue was released in 2010)

Writer: Grant Morrison

Batman (1940) #713 (this issue was released in 2011)

Writer: Fabian Nicieza

This will always be DC.

Fourth Main Universe

Nightwing (2011) #0

Writers: Kyle Higgins & Tom DeFalco

So, yeah. Canon is a social construct. Some writers see them as brothers, some as best friends, some as equals, some as father and son, some as fricking colleagues, and I'm sure you can find someone who sees them as lovers. This is literally a pick your poison type of deal here.

And all of this. All of this just to talk about Dick and Bruce. I have barely even touched the present continuity (the fourth one, I'm not counting soft reboots because everytime a new writer appears it is a soft reboot istG). I haven't even gotten to Jason.

I'll do a part two in the reblogs later about him, lmao. Probably make my own post as not to clog op's notes (this was supposed to be a short answer and it got way too long)

If you want some recs about a character in particular, or a specific type of relationship, feel free to hit me up! I'll see what I can find

dick and jason trying to give tim the crash course on what it's like to be robin, except tim leaves the conversation more confused than he was before, because everyone quickly had the realisation that there was. definitely a favourite child

dick goes on about how bruce's teachings gave him healthy outlets for his grief and anger etc etc, whilst jason's very much confused because he was kinda under the impression that robin was an outlet for bruce's feelings.

dick says that the father-mentor ratio was really well balanced during his time as robin, and bruce always saw him as a son first. and jason's just like "....i didn't even know he saw me as his son until after i died????"

[brunchable]

𝗠𝘆 𝗡𝗲𝗶𝗴𝗵𝗯𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗶𝘀 𝗮 𝗣𝗼𝗿𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗿 [ 3 ]

Pairings: PornStar!Bucky Barnes x f!Reader Themes: Game of Cat and Mouse. Bucky being stubborn as shit. Summary: Things have turned awkward. You and Bucky hasn't spoken with each other for a few days now. But is the much needed space making things better or worse? A/N: Sorry this took so long lmao. My boy got sick and needed my undivided attention my poor baby but he's better now thank god. A/N: I honestly don't know how to top-up the previous parts but shit, I need them to connect to a deeper level first before jumping into full on smut okay? maybe in the next part. The song sums up the whole fic to be honest lol.

You’d become a master at memorizing Bucky’s schedule, knowing exactly when to leave your apartment to avoid any chance of running into him. But lately, it seemed like Bucky had developed the same strategy, and you couldn’t help but notice the way his presence around the building had become increasingly scarce. It was almost as if he was avoiding you instead.

Today, though, you decided to switch things up by taking the stairs. Sure, it was three flights down, but anything was better than the awkward tension of waiting for the elevator and possibly bumping into him. You clung to the faint hope that the odds would work in your favor, that the stairwell would be empty and uneventful.

But as you descended, the sound of footsteps echoed from below, growing louder with every step. Your stomach flipped, an irrational hope bubbling up before you could quash it. Maybe it’s not him, you thought, though deep down, you already knew better.

Rounding the corner, your heart sank and raced all at once. There he was—Bucky, just a few steps below you, pausing mid-step with his hand gripping the railing. His eyes met yours, and for a moment, neither of you moved. His expression shifted, a flicker of surprise quickly replaced by something guarded, his jaw tightening as if he’d been caught doing something he shouldn’t.

“Oh,” you breathed, your voice softer than you’d intended. “Hi.”

His lips pressed into a tight line before he offered a stiff nod. “Hey,” he replied, his voice low, carefully neutral.

You stared at each other for a beat too long, the air between you thick with unsaid words. He looked almost annoyed—not at you, but at the situation, as if running into you had thrown him off his game. And maybe it had, because for the first time, it wasn’t you avoiding him. It was him avoiding you.

“So…taking the stairs now?” His tone was casual, but his eyes betrayed a hint of tension, a wall firmly in place.

You forced a laugh, though it sounded hollow even to your own ears. “Yeah, um… decided to switch things up. Exercise, you know.”

He nodded once, his grip tightening briefly on the railing before loosening again. “Right. Exercise.”

Another awkward silence settled over you, the sound of distant voices from above faintly filling the void. You shifted on the step, clutching the railing a little too tightly, your mind scrambling for something to say—something that wouldn’t make things worse. But before you could speak, Bucky cleared his throat and took a step to the side, making way for you to pass.

“Alright,” he said, his voice clipped. “I’ll… see you around.”

“Yeah,” you replied quietly, hesitating for a moment before you stepped past him. “See you.”

As you descended the stairs, your pulse pounded in your ears, each step feeling heavier than the last. You risked a glance back, only to find him already climbing upward, his shoulders tense, his head down. The image lingered in your mind, the sight of him retreating, the weight of his silence pressing down on you like a stone.

You reached the bottom landing, gripping the railing as you let out a slow breath. Part of you wanted to turn around, to call after him. But the words stayed stuck in your throat, tangled up with your own doubts and fears.

If he didn’t want to talk, you wouldn’t force him. But that didn’t make the ache in your chest any easier to bear.

× × × ×

You arrived at work, your mood sour and your thoughts tangled up in that awkward encounter with Bucky on the stairs. The usual morning chatter of the office greeted you. Trying to focus, you went to your desk, arranging your things in a futile attempt to bring some order to your day.

But then you heard them—Trish and Amy, huddled at the corner near the coffee machine, voices low but still clear enough to reach you.

“I just don’t get it,” Trish was saying. “It’s been days, and there’s still no new uploads from SergeantBarnes. Maybe he’s got a new project or something?”

“Or maybe he’s seeing someone?” Amy added with a conspiratorial tone. “I mean, think about it. He’s been off the grid lately. That’s got ‘new fling’ written all over it.”

You clenched your jaw, trying to block out their conversation. It was the last thing you wanted to hear today, and every word just stoked the frustration simmering inside you. You took a deep breath, attempting to rein in your annoyance, but they just kept going, their words grating at you.

“Honestly, it’s like he’s gone quiet for no reason,” Trish went on, sounding genuinely disappointed. “What am I supposed to watch while I’m waiting for Dan to finish his gaming marathons?”

“Is that all you two talk about?”

You couldn’t help it; something inside you snapped. Before you knew it, you turned around, your voice sharper than you intended.

Both Trish and Amy blinked in surprise, their expressions shifting from confusion to embarrassment. You continued, unable to stop yourself now that you’d started. 

“You both have partners, for crying out loud. Do you really need to spend every second gossiping about some guy online?”

They exchanged glances, clearly taken aback. “Jeez, sorry,” Trish muttered, looking both defensive and a little hurt. “We didn’t think it was that big of a deal.”

“It is when we’re supposed to be working,” you replied, more irritated than you’d intended. “Maybe keep the fan talk out of the office? Or, I don’t know, find a hobby that doesn’t involve obsessing over someone else’s life?”

Silence fell as they looked at you, wide-eyed and a bit stunned. Realizing how harsh you’d sounded, you took a step back, immediately feeling a pang of regret. But the frustration from this morning was still fresh, and you couldn’t bring yourself to apologize just yet. Instead, you turned back to your desk, jaw clenched, hoping the tension in the office would dissipate as the day went on.

At the end of your shift, the weight of the day felt heavier than usual. The tension with Bucky hung over you like a cloud, lingering in your thoughts despite your best efforts to shake it off. It shouldn’t even be this deep—so why were you so affected? It’s just a casual thing, you reasoned with yourself. We’re barely even… whatever this is.

Yet, no matter how many times you told yourself to move on, the thought of Bucky—the way he’d looked at you, the frustration and hurt in his eyes—gnawed at you. You found yourself mentally bargaining, trying to find some middle ground, some way to keep your guard up but let him in a little, too. Maybe if I didn’t overthink it… if I just let it be whatever it is, I wouldn’t feel this way.

As you gathered your things, ready to head out, Trish and Amy approached with hesitant smiles. 

“Hey, you okay?” Trish asked gently, her earlier excitement replaced with genuine concern.

You managed a small, apologetic smile. 

“I’m so sorry about this morning,” you said, glancing between them. “I shouldn’t have snapped at you both. Just… a rough few days.”

They nodded in understanding, exchanging a quick look before Trish turned back to you. 

“No worries, but hey, if there’s something bothering you… maybe we can help? What do you say to grabbing some dinner with us? We can talk or not talk about it?”

Amy’s face lit up as she chimed in. “Yeah! You shouldn’t have to stew over whatever it is alone. Come on, let us treat you to some comfort food.”

Their unexpected warmth and support tugged at something in you, and you felt the weight on your shoulders ease just a little. 

With a small smile, you nodded. “Sure, that sounds nice. Thanks, guys.”

They grinned, and without missing a beat, each linked an arm through yours on either side, leading you toward the door as if they were determined to help you shake off every ounce of stress you’d been carrying. As you walked together, their chatter filled the air, and you let yourself settle into the easy companionship, hoping that maybe tonight would give you the reset you needed.

× × × ×

Across town, Bucky was pouring everything he had into the punching bag in front of him, each hit landing with a force that reverberated through his whole body. The gym was nearly empty, giving him the space to unload, each punch fueled by the frustration and confusion that had been building inside him for days. His jaw was clenched, beads of sweat trickling down his forehead as he moved, his muscles tense and coiled with pent-up energy. The sharp sound of his fists colliding with the bag echoed through the room, filling the silence as he worked to dump every complicated thought he’d been grappling with.

He had no reason to be as affected as he was, but the whole situation with you had hit him harder than he expected. He’d thought he could brush it off, ignore the strange ache that crept up every time he thought about your last conversation, but it stuck with him.

After a final, powerful jab, Bucky took a step back, breathing heavily as he let his hands drop to his sides. His mind was still a storm of thoughts, the adrenaline from his workout doing little to clear his head.

When he wasn’t working off steam in the gym, Bucky’s day-to-day was far less chaotic than most people would assume. As an automotive engineer at Ford, he spent hours each day under the hood, designing, testing, and refining high-performance engines. His focus had always been on innovation, on precision, on building something that could withstand any test. It was work he loved—real work, with real meaning, where every bolt and every part had a purpose.

The other job, his work in front of the camera, was different. It was an outlet, a separate side of himself he’d chosen to explore. People saw it for what it was on the surface, but it never felt like the core of who he was. You, however, had somehow managed to blur the lines between the two worlds in a way that left him unsteady. And for the first time, he found himself wondering if keeping his other job had been the right one.

The memory of your face—surprised, hesitant, almost wounded—came rushing back to him, making his chest tighten with something more complicated than he was prepared to face. 

Why did it matter so much? She’s just my neighbor, he thought. 

He sighed, pressing his gloved fists to his forehead as he tried to shake off the ache that had settled there. For now, all he could do was keep hitting, keep moving, hoping that maybe, at some point, the weight of it would finally start to lighten.

Later that evening, Bucky found himself in his kitchen, mindlessly stirring a pot on the stove. The rhythmic motion and steady bubbling should have been enough to distract him, but his thoughts kept drifting—inevitably back to you.

He remembered the first time you’d crossed paths in the building, how you’d barely glanced at him as you carried a pile of boxes through the hallway. It had amused him, how determined you were to act unaffected, especially after that sudden recognition flashed in your eyes. That little double-take when you realized who he was had been priceless. He’d leaned into that reaction ever since, throwing little teases and comments just to see your reaction, to see the way your cheeks would flush or how your gaze would flit away, only to sneak back.

There was something refreshing about the way you seemed to care so little about the reputation attached to him—so different from others he’d met. And maybe that was why he couldn’t resist teasing you, why he went out of his way to bump into you, to throw in a bit of banter just to see if he could make you smile or throw him a comeback.

But he never expected it to go beyond that. He didn’t expect that somewhere along the line, those little interactions would turn into something he looked forward to. And now, somehow, it had gotten tangled up with feelings he wasn’t prepared to deal with.

Bucky stirred the pot a little too vigorously, and a few drops splashed over the edge, hissing as they hit the stovetop. His hand stilled as he sighed, feeling the frustration bubble up all over again. This is my fault, he thought, jaw clenching slightly. I shouldn’t have come onto her too strong.

He hadn’t realized he was stirring so absentmindedly until the pot suddenly began to overflow, the liquid spilling over the edge and sizzling against the hot burner. With a muttered curse, he quickly grabbed a towel, lifting the pot off the heat and wiping up the mess, the sharp smell of burnt food pulling him out of his thoughts.

As he turned off the stove, he couldn’t help but wonder what it would take to make things right with you.

× × × ×

After a long day, you found yourself standing outside Bucky’s door, nerves twisting in your stomach. Just apologize, you told yourself, trying to gather the courage. Get it over with and clear the air. But as you stared at the door, words rehearsed in your mind, you found yourself hesitating. You’d been standing there so long that you’d lost track of time, each second stretching as you cycled through a list of possible things to say, none of which seemed quite right.

Taking a deep breath, you raised your hand to knock when a light, feminine laugh floated through the door, catching you off guard. You froze, your hand mid-air, as the laughter was followed by a familiar deep chuckle. Bucky’s.

"Alright, alright,” you heard him say, sounding more relaxed than you’d ever heard him with you. There was a warmth in his voice that sent a pang through your chest, the kind that came from comfort, closeness.

“Oh, come on, don’t act like you didn’t miss me,” the woman teased, her tone playful and affectionate. “I know you. You’re never this nice to anyone else.”

You swallowed, something tightening in your chest as you listened.

"Alright, guilty," Bucky’s voice softened, almost shy. "Guess you’ve always been a bit of a soft spot."

Your heart twisted, her words and his response echoing in your mind, each line pulling you deeper into a sense of unease. Soft spot? Nice to her in a way he wasn’t with anyone else?

Your mind jumped to the worst possible conclusion, and your cheeks heated as your throat tightened. You felt silly for standing there now, silly for even considering coming over to apologize. What were am I doing? Of course he's with someone.

Just then, you heard footsteps approaching the door, and panic flared. You turned, bolting toward your own apartment, fumbling with your keys as you heard Bucky’s door open behind you. Just as you managed to close your door, you caught a glimpse of him glancing down the hall, his gaze lingering on your door with a curious look.

Bucky’s sister, Becca, caught him glancing toward your door, she raised an eyebrow, nudging him with a knowing smile. 

“What’s up with you?” she asked, a touch of teasing in her voice. “Is everything okay?”

Bucky gave his head a quick shake, trying to dismiss the worry that had settled there. 

“Yeah, yeah… it’s nothing. Just thought I saw something,” he replied, though his gaze lingered a moment longer on your door before he finally turned back to Becca.

She didn’t look convinced. Folding her arms, she tilted her head, giving him a look that only an older sister could manage—the kind that saw right through any attempt to hide. 

“Are you sure? You’ve seemed a little off tonight, Bucky. I don’t think it’s nothing.”

Bucky held up his hands defensively, a hint of a grin tugging at his lips as he tried to brush her off. 

“Nothing! Really, it’s nothing. Now go home, seriously,” he insisted, ushering her toward the elevator with a slight push.

Becca rolled her eyes, clearly not buying it for a second. 

“Right. Nothing,” she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm as she gave him a knowing look. “You’re a terrible liar, you know that?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Bucky muttered, a bit more forcefully this time, though he couldn’t quite hide the smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth. “Go on before you start reading my palm or something.”

Becca laughed, throwing her hands up in mock surrender. 

“Alright, alright, I’m going,” she said as she stepped into the elevator, though she gave him one last pointed look as the doors began to close. “But, Bucky? maybe figure out what you want before you drive yourself crazy over it.”

With that, the doors shut, leaving Bucky standing in the quiet hallway, he sighed, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he glanced back toward your door.

Later that night, Bucky found himself slumped on his couch, phone in hand as he stared at the search bar. He let out a huff, rolling his eyes at himself as he typed: signs you’re into someone.

The results loaded quickly, and he clicked the first article, skimming the list with a mixture of skepticism and, admittedly, nervous anticipation.

Sign #1: You can’t stop thinking about them. 

He paused, frowning at the screen. “Okay, that’s… kind of obvious,” he muttered, mentally ticking off that box with a begrudging sigh.

Sign #2: You go out of your way to see them.

Bucky narrowed his eyes at his phone, a smirk tugging at his lips. 

“That one’s just stupid. I mean, we live in the same building. I don’t go out of my—” He paused, remembering all the times he’d “accidentally” found himself in the hallway when you’d get back from work, or when he’d gone to the laundry room at oddly specific times. “Okay, fine. Maybe sometimes.”

He kept scrolling, and the list grew more absurd—do you get jealous when they talk about other people? Do you go out of your way to impress them? By the end of it, he’d mentally checked off nearly every box, his expression morphing into a blend of reluctant acceptance and amusement.

Bucky sighed, tossing his phone onto the couch beside him. 

“What am I, sixteen?” he muttered, rubbing a hand over his face. Here he was, a grown man, looking up articles about crushes and ticking off boxes like he needed some random website to validate what he already knew.

But as he sat there, he realized it wasn’t the checklist itself—it was the fact that, for the first time in a long time, he felt like this. Like he actually cared about where things went, enough to drive him to ridiculous measures for some kind of clarity.

With a sigh, he leaned back, staring at the ceiling, the weight of realization settling in. Bucky stared at the ceiling for a few more moments, letting out a deep sigh before grabbing his phone again and pulling up his contacts. Scrolling down to “Steve,” he hesitated for a beat before tapping the call button.

It rang twice before his friend picked up with a cheerful, “Yellow?”

Bucky rolled his eyes, smiling anyway. “Hey, punk.”

“Bucky!” Steve’s voice was light, clearly amused. “What’s up? It’s been a while since you called just to say ‘hi.’”

“Yeah, yeah,” Bucky muttered, shifting uncomfortably. “I… actually had a question. Kind of. For… a friend.”

“Oh, a ‘friend,’ huh? Sure, I’m listening.” Steve chuckled on the other end, and Bucky could practically hear the grin in his voice.

Bucky cleared his throat, leaning back into the couch. 

“Right. So, uh, hypothetically speaking… how do you know if, you know, if you’re into someone? Like, in a way that’s… not just friendly?” His words tumbled out, each one feeling more absurd than the last.

“Your ‘friend’ wants to know how to tell if they’ve got a crush, huh? Didn’t realize we were back in high school, Buck.” Steve snorted, not bothering to hide his amusement.

Bucky sighed, feeling his face heat up. “Look, if you’re gonna be annoying, I’ll just—”

“No, no, no, I’m sorry,” Steve said quickly, though he was still chuckling. “Okay, seriously. Well… I guess if your ‘friend’ can’t stop thinking about her, or if he finds himself looking for reasons to be around her, that’s usually a sign. Or if he’s, you know, protective, feels that weird jealousy thing… you know how it goes.”

Bucky was silent for a second, swallowing as he mentally ticked off each of Steve’s points. “Right. Yeah. Hypothetically, that makes sense,” he mumbled, rubbing a hand over his jaw.

“And,” Steve continued, now sounding suspiciously entertained, “if your ‘friend’ is calling up his actual best friend in the middle of the night to figure it out… well, that might be a bit of a giveaway, too.”

Bucky groaned, falling back into the couch with a scowl. “Alright, alright, I get it. Thanks, Steve.”

But Steve wasn’t finished. “Hey, Buck? If you’re asking for yourself—which we both know you are—maybe just tell her how you feel. You’re not as subtle as you think, and if she’s worth this much thought… she’s probably worth the risk, too.”

Bucky was quiet, swallowing the mix of nerves and excitement that Steve’s words stirred up. “…Yeah. Thanks, pal.”

× × × × 

The next morning, you were practically sprinting down the hall, head ducked and heart racing, when you heard him call out, “Hey! Y/N—wait up!”

You didn’t dare look back, only quickened your steps, praying he’d let it go. But his footsteps grew closer, and just as you reached the lobby, you felt a hand gently graze your shoulder.

With an awkward yelp, you dodged sideways, almost colliding with a potted plant as you called over your shoulder, “Sorry, Bucky—gotta go! Late for work!” 

You bolted through the doors, ignoring the bewildered look he gave you as you disappeared into the morning rush.

You turned off your phone completely, just to avoid the constant notifications. His messages had started out simple—Hey, can we talk?—but quickly escalated. Each ding had become a taunt, a reminder that, even though he seemed persistent, there was no other reason to face him now. You left your phone off for nearly a full day, and by the time you turned it back on, there were over a dozen missed calls and messages waiting for you, each one a pinch of guilt you tried to ignore.

And just when you thought you’d mastered the art of dodging, fate had other plans.

Untik one bleary-eyed morning, as you rushed out of your apartment with a coffee in one hand and your bag slipping off the other shoulder, you came face-to-face with Bucky at the end of the hallway. There was no escape route this time; he was standing right in your path, his arms folded and an expression somewhere between concerned and utterly frustrated.

You tried to step to the left, but he mirrored you, stepping right into your path.

You shifted right, and he stepped left, blocking you again.

You both paused, sizing each other up. Then, in unison, you both moved left, only to collide shoulders. You exhaled in frustration, darting to the right, but he sidestepped with you again.

“Bucky, please,” you groaned, your patience wearing thin, feeling the minutes tick closer to being late. “I have to go.”

His eyes softened just a little, but he didn’t budge. “Not until you stop running away from me. Can we just talk?”

You scowled, giving him one last sidestep to the left, only to be blocked again. With a frustrated sigh, you finally did the only thing left: you placed both hands on his chest and gave him a firm push, slipping past him before he could react.

“I’m late,” you muttered, not looking back as you all but jogged down the hallway, leaving Bucky in the wake of your retreat, his gaze following you with an expression that told you he wasn’t giving up. Hell no.

× × × ×

Until one day, when you were in the middle of work, a receptionist from the ground floor called up to tell you that someone wanted to see you. Curiosity and irritation flared as you made your way down, a frown already forming on your face. And the second you spotted him—standing in the lobby, arms crossed, looking as frustrated as you’d ever seen him—you felt your heart drop.

You turned on your heel, muttering to yourself, “Unbelievable…” But before you could make it far, he called out.

“Y/N!” His voice echoed across the lobby, and you turned back with a glare.

“What the hell are you doing here, Bucky?” you hissed, stepping closer so your conversation stayed private, though part of you just wanted to get him out of the building before anyone noticed.

His jaw was set, his gaze determined. “Can we talk?”

“There’s nothing to talk about,” you shot back, crossing your arms. “Nothing should have happened between us. Let’s just… leave it at that.”

He frowned, visibly taken aback by your bluntness. 

“How can you say that?” he demanded, his voice low but intense.

Your throat tightened, but you held your ground. 

“I need to get back to work,” you said, not meeting his eyes. You turned to leave, but his voice stopped you once again.

“I’m not leaving,” he said firmly. “I’ll wait right here until you clock out if that’s what it takes. We’re going to talk, Y/N.”

You groaned, feeling a mix of frustration and disbelief. “Bucky, go home.”

But he didn’t budge. Instead, he took a seat in one of the lobby chairs, crossing his arms and settling in as if he were prepared to stay all night. Despite the receptionist’s raised eyebrows and curious glances from passing employees, Bucky stayed put, a stubborn expression on his face that only grew more determined with each hour that passed.

Throughout the afternoon, you tried to focus on your work, but every so often, curiosity and frustration got the better of you. By mid-afternoon, you found yourself messaging the receptionist, unable to resist asking, “Is he still there?”

The reply was quick and confirmed what you feared: “He hasn’t moved. Just sitting there, staring at his phone.”

You sighed, feeling a pang of guilt despite yourself. “Could you… maybe offer him a drink or something? He’s not going to leave, is he?”

The receptionist’s response was amused. “Already tried. Said he’s fine, but he appreciates it.”

The next day, he was there again, seated in the same chair, his arms crossed and his expression set like stone. This time, he came prepared—there was coffee waiting on the front desk with your name on it. When Trish and Amy teased you about the mysterious admirer, you convinced them to sneak out the back exit with you after work.

The day after that, he stepped it up. Roses. A beautiful arrangement of vibrant blooms appeared on your desk, the receptionist delivering them with a knowing smile. Your coworkers were relentless, whispering about your "secret boyfriend" and giving you sly grins every time they passed your desk. Again, you dodged them and Bucky, slipping out the back exit before he could catch you.

But no matter how much you avoided him, Bucky didn’t give up. Each morning, he was there, as stubborn as a mule—or more appropriately, as stubborn as Bucky Barnes. His persistence was unwavering, his resolve impossible to break.

Finally, on the fourth day, the receptionist herself came up to your floor, pulling you aside with a raised eyebrow and a knowing smirk.

“Y/N,” she began, her tone friendly but firm, “you’ve got to talk to him.”

Your stomach twisted as you glanced at her. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

She arched a brow, clearly unimpressed with your deflection. 

“Your man. He’s down there again. Same chair, same determined look. And he’s got flowers. Again.” She folded her arms, her expression softening slightly. “Look, I don’t know what’s going on between you two, but he’s been here every day for the past four days. He’s polite, patient, doesn’t bother anyone, but... it’s obvious he’s waiting for you.”

Your cheeks burned, and you felt the weight of her words settle over you. “He’s not my—”

“Y/N.” She cut you off, giving you a pointed look. “Just talk to him. If for no other reason than to put him out of his misery. I’ve worked here for five years, and I’ve never seen anyone that persistent. Trust me, most guys wouldn’t even wait an hour.”

You sighed, rubbing a hand over your face. “He’s... complicated.”

The receptionist chuckled, shaking her head. “Aren’t they all? But the way he’s sitting down there, looking like a kicked puppy one minute and a stubborn bulldog the next? That’s not complicated. That’s someone who cares.” She leaned in closer, lowering her voice. “Don’t let something good slip away just because it’s messy.”

Her words lingered long after she walked away, leaving you standing in the hallway, your heart thundering in your chest. You peeked toward the elevator, debating whether you could sneak out through the back again. But deep down, you knew she was right.

Bucky was waiting. And he wasn’t going anywhere.

With a deep breath, you grabbed your things, bracing yourself for what was bound to be another conversation you weren’t sure you were ready for.

× × × ×

You stepped into the lobby, your pulse quickened. There he was, sitting exactly where he’d planted himself hours ago, looking a little rumpled, maybe even tired, but every bit as determined as ever. His gaze lifted the moment you appeared, and for a second, his whole expression softened in a way that made your heart skip a beat. Relief, warmth, maybe even something more—it was all there, clear as day, and somehow it made this moment feel… different.

Bucky rose, a small, boyish grin tugging at the corner of his mouth as he approached. He didn’t say anything at first, just looked at you, letting the silence between you speak. The noise of the lobby faded away, leaving just the two of you, wrapped in a quiet, invisible bubble.

You forced yourself to stay steady, trying to keep the upper hand. Arms crossed, you raised an eyebrow at him. “So… you camped out here all day?”

His smile turned a little sheepish, but there was no hint of apology in his tone. 

“Told you I’d wait. Figured you’d come down eventually.” He took a half-step closer, his voice soft and warm, laced with that casual mischief that made it impossible not to smile.

You rolled your eyes, biting back the smile creeping up. “Could’ve just… I don’t know, texted? Called? Like a normal person?”

He tilted his head, his grin widening just enough to make your heart trip over itself. 

“I tried that, remember? Didn’t seem to work on you.” He shrugged, completely unfazed. “So I figured I’d go old-school. Sometimes persistence pays off.”

“Persistence,” you muttered, pretending to sound exasperated. “You mean showing up uninvited?”

Before Bucky could answer, the unmistakable chatter of Trish and Amy echoed from the elevator behind you. Your heart jumped into your throat. Oh no. Absolutely not.

Without thinking, you stepped closer to Bucky, practically pressing yourself against him as you yanked your bag off your shoulder and lifted it up like a makeshift shield to block both of your faces.

Bucky froze, his body stiffening at your sudden proximity, but his expression quickly shifted to pure amusement. His lips twitched as he looked down at you, your bag wobbling precariously on the side of your faces.

“Um… what are you doing?” he whispered, his breath brushing against your forehead.

“Shhh!” you hissed, tilting the bag slightly to peek over it. Trish and Amy were slowly walking toward the front doors, their voices growing louder. “Just… don’t move. They can’t see me with you.”

“And why’s that?” Bucky asked, his voice low and teasing, though he didn’t budge. Instead, he leaned down a fraction, his face hovering closer to yours. “Afraid they’ll get the wrong idea?”

“No, I’m afraid they’ll get the right idea,” you snapped under your breath, glaring up at him.

His eyes sparkled, and his grin widened. “Oh, really? And what idea would that be, sweetheart?”

“Bucky,” you warned, the heat rising in your cheeks as you tilted your bag higher, completely covering his smirking face.

But Bucky didn’t seem fazed. If anything, he seemed more amused, his gaze dropping to your face like you were the most fascinating thing he laid eyes upon. His voice softened, the teasing edge replaced by something warmer. 

“You know, you’re really bad at hiding.”

“Shut up,” you mumbled, biting the inside of your cheek to keep from smiling.

He chuckled, his chest vibrating lightly against you. “Not gonna lie, this might be the highlight of my day. You, using me as a human shield. Very flattering.”

“Oh shut up,” you whispered, but your voice wavered, betraying the way your pulse was racing.

Trish and Amy finally passed by, oblivious to the two of you tucked against the corner. You let out a breath of relief, slowly lowering your bag. But before you could step away, you realized how close you were—Bucky’s face mere inches from yours, his eyes locked on yours with an intensity that made your heart stutter.

His voice dropped, soft and almost reverent. “You can hide from them all you want. But you can’t keep hiding from me, Y/N.”

Your breath hitched, and for a moment, all you could do was stare back at him, caught in the pull of his gaze. The noise of the lobby faded again, leaving just the two of you in your own little world.

“I told you,” he murmured, his tone steady but impossibly gentle. “I’m not leaving until you talk to me.”

You tried to ignore the thrill of butterflies that his words sparked. “Like I said, there’s nothing to talk about, Bucky. We should just keep our distance from each other okay?”

He took a steadying breath, his brows drawing together, his voice losing that playful edge. 

“How can you just decide that?” he asked, his tone almost pleading. “You don’t even know…”

You shifted, heart pounding. “Because I know you’re already seeing someone else. I don’t need to be another complication in your life.”

He blinked, visibly taken aback. And then, just as quickly, his face softened, an incredulous, almost disbelieving laugh escaping him. 

“Seeing someone else? Where did you get that idea?”

Heat crept up your cheeks as you tried to hold your ground. “I—I heard her, okay? When I was at your door the other day. The laughing, the… the way you sounded with her…” You bit your lip, looking anywhere but at him.

“Oh.” 

He let out another breathy laugh, shaking his head as if you’d just told him the most ridiculous thing he’d ever heard. 

“Y/N… that wasn’t a date. She’s not—” He broke off, running a hand through his hair, his expression a mix of exasperation and utter amusement. “She’s my sister.”

Your mouth dropped open, the realization hitting you like a freight train. “… what?”

“Yeah, my sister, Becca. She was just in town visiting.” He gave you a look of pure, amused disbelief, a grin pulling at the corners of his mouth. “God, you really thought I was seeing someone?”

“Well, what else was I supposed to think?” you muttered, cheeks flaming with embarrassment.

Bucky’s smile softened, and he took another step closer, until there was hardly any space between you. 

“You should’ve just asked,” he murmured, his voice low and warm. “Instead of. . . I don’t know? Avoiding me like the plague?”

You tried to summon a retort, but your heart was racing, your thoughts jumbled by his proximity and the way his gaze seemed to hold you captive.

Bucky chuckled, the sound soft and full of affection as he reached out, gently tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear. 

“All this because of a misunderstanding?” His voice was low, his hand lingering, fingers brushing against your cheek. “I’ve been going crazy trying to figure out why you’re dead set on ignoring me.”

You managed to look up at him, heart pounding as you searched his eyes, suddenly feeling like all the air had been sucked out of the room. 

“So… you’re not seeing anyone?”

“There’s only one person I want to see,” he murmured, his hand dropping from your face and now brushing against your arm. “And I thought I’m making that pretty clear?”

Your mouth opened and closed then opened again, “Okay. . .”

“Okay. . .” Bucky chuckles and steps back, “Shall we. . . restart?”

A flicker of surprise crossed your face, and a warmth bloomed in your chest at his invitation. You’d spent so many days tangled in your own assumptions, convinced things between you were over before they even began, and here he was, offering an olive branch with that disarming smile.

“Restart?” you echoed, your heart skipping a beat as you met his gaze.

He nodded, his expression softening even more. “Yeah.”

You gave him a small, hesitant smile, feeling a mixture of excitement and nerves. “Yeah… I think I’d like that.”

Bucky’s grin widened, relief and something warmer sparking in his eyes. “Great. Let’s go home?”

“U-Uh, sure.”

× × × ×

The streets were alive with the hum of the city—cars rushing by, distant chatter from groups of people, and the occasional burst of laughter from passersby. But despite the liveliness around you, there was an unspoken tension in the air.

You noticed the way women’s heads turned as you passed, their gazes lingering a little too long on Bucky. It didn’t help that he looked effortlessly handsome, his casual outfit somehow drawing more attention than it should have. A part of you wanted to roll your eyes, but another part couldn’t blame them.

Bucky didn’t seem to notice—or maybe he just didn’t care. His focus remained on you, his stride matching yours, though there was a slight hesitation in his step.

“You’re quiet,” you murmured, glancing up at him as you adjusted the bouquet in your arms.

He let out a soft hum, his hands sliding into his pockets. “Just thinking,” he said, his voice low.

“About?”

He hesitated, his jaw tightening slightly before he finally spoke. “About that night.”

Your heart skipped a beat at his words, and you instinctively looked away, focusing on the ground ahead of you. 

“I thought we weren’t going to bring that up,” you said softly, your voice tinged with both unease and curiosity.

“We have to talk about it eventually,” he replied, his tone steady but gentle. “I don’t like leaving things unresolved, Y/N.”

When you finally reached the corner of your block, you slowed your steps. Bucky noticed, his own pace matching yours, and for a moment, neither of you spoke.

The two of you moved to the quieter steps of your building, sitting side by side. The soft hum of the city buzzed around you, but it felt distant, like it belonged to another world entirely. Your bag rested on your lap, your face soft under the streetlights, but the tension in the air was anything but light.

Bucky broke the silence first, his hands clasped together as he leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees. 

“I’ve been wanting to say this for a while,” he started, his voice low but steady. “That night… I wasn’t mad at you. I was mad at myself.”

You blinked, turning to him in surprise. “Mad at yourself?”

He nodded, his jaw clenching for a moment before he continued. “Yeah. I thought I’d scared you off, made you feel like I wasn’t taking you seriously. The last thing I ever wanted was for you to think I was just… using you.”

Your fingers tightened around the bouquet, the ache in his voice tugging at something deep in your chest. 

“Bucky, it wasn’t just about you,” you admitted quietly. “It was me, too. I panicked. I wasn’t sure if I could handle…” You hesitated, searching for the right words. “Handle what your life looks like.”

His head tilted slightly, his blue eyes softening as he looked at you. “Because of my job,” he said gently, not as a question, but a statement.

You nodded, feeling a lump form in your throat. 

“It’s hard, Bucky. I hear my coworkers talking about you—about SergeantBarnes—all the time. They don’t know it’s you, but it’s constant. They treat you like… like you’re this fantasy, this unattainable thing. And it’s not just them. It’s everyone who sees you online, who only knows that part of you.”

He stayed silent, letting your words settle, his gaze never leaving your face.

“And then there’s me,” you continued, your voice wavering slightly. “I don’t want to be another name on a list or someone who gets overshadowed by… by the version of you that everyone else thinks they know.”

Bucky leaned forward again, his elbows resting on his knees as he turned his head to look at you. The streetlights cast a soft glow over his face, highlighting the sincerity in his expression.

“I get that,” he repeated, his voice quieter now, almost contemplative. “And I hate that you feel that way. But Y/N, you’re not another name on a list to me. You’re not someone who gets lost in all of that… noise.”

You held his gaze, the weight of his words settling in your chest. His patience today, his persistence—it wasn’t the action of someone who saw you as fleeting or inconsequential. It was the effort of someone who cared, deeply.

Bucky sighed softly, rubbing a hand over his face. “Look, I’ve kept my work and personal life separate for a reason. It’s always been easier to compartmentalize, to keep everything from bleeding into each other. But now? Now I realize that I didn’t think about what would happen if someone—if you—became significant to me.”

Your chest tightened, his words chipping away at the insecurities you’d been holding onto. “Bucky…”

Bucky turned toward you fully, his blue eyes locking onto yours, raw and unguarded in a way that made your heart ache. 

“If I told you that I want to spend every day and night with you—not just because I like you, but because you’ve become the one constant person I can’t stop thinking about. If I told you that you’re my sanity when the world feels like chaos, my laughter, my desire, my comfort, my day and my night, my cold and heat—If I told you that, would you think that translates to only wanting you as ‘one of my girls’?”

Your breath caught, the raw honesty in his words shaking you. “Bucky…”

“I know my job makes things messy,” he continued, his voice quieter now, like he was almost ashamed. “But I get it—I get why it’s hard for you. I hate that it’s something that puts distance between us.”

He looked down at his hands for a moment before meeting your gaze again. “If I could go back and change things, I would. I’d do whatever it takes to make this easier for you.”

Your throat tightened, the sincerity in his voice making it hard to speak. 

“I don’t want you to feel like you have to change who you are for me,” you said softly.

“It’s not about changing who I am,” he replied, shaking his head. “It’s about making sure I don’t lose something.”

Bucky exhaled slowly, his hands fidgeting as he leaned back against the step, staring up at the night sky for a moment before turning his gaze back to you.

“I’m gonna be really honest with you, Y/N,” he started, his voice low, hesitant. “I don’t know what I’m gonna do about the… other stuff yet. It’s not as simple as just walking away. I’ve got contracts, commitments—it’s not something I can just drop overnight.”

Your chest tightened at his words, but you nodded, appreciating his honesty even as the knot in your stomach grew. 

"And that means... what exactly?" you asked, even though deep down, you already knew.

Bucky’s jaw tightened, and he let out an exasperated chuckle, running a hand through his hair. “Do you really want me to say it? Do I have to say it?”

You didn’t flinch this time, your voice cutting through the tension with unsettling clarity. “It means you have to keep having sex with other porn stars… right?”

Bucky winced at the bluntness of your question, the words hitting him harder than he expected. His jaw tightened, and for a moment, he didn’t say anything, his gaze dropping to the ground as he wrestled with what felt like shame.

You sighed heavily, pressing the heel of your hand against your forehead as you shut your eyes tightly. Your mind was spinning, your emotions tangled in a knot you couldn’t untie. Out of all the men that could catch your interest, why did it have to be him?

“You are the most complicated guy I’ve ever met,” you said, letting out a short, humorless laugh that carried no amusement, only exhaustion. “Oh my gosh, I honestly don’t even know—” You paused, your voice faltering as you opened your eyes and looked at him, the frustration bubbling to the surface. “How would you make it easier for me, Bucky? How?”

Bucky swallowed thickly, his Adam’s apple bobbing as his lips parted, his gaze flickering over your face. He was clearly thinking, his mind working furiously to find a solution, any solution.

"Do you… not like the idea of me with other women?" he asked tentatively, his tone cautious.

You snorted, narrowing your eyes at him. "That’s a stupid question, Bucky."

"Just say yes or no," he pressed, his gaze intent.

"Yes, I do not like the idea," you snapped, your tone sharp with irritation. "But I can’t prevent it, can I?"

Bucky took a deep breath, his jaw tightening as he stared at you. Then, his next words came out carefully, almost testing the waters. 

“What if. . .you do it with me?”

Your eyes widened, disbelief flooding your expression as his suggestion hung in the air. 

Slowly, a startled laugh escaped your lips. 

"Are you joking? You’re out of your mind if you think I’d showcase my body to the world like that!"

"I’m not saying you have to," he said quickly, his hands raising defensively. "I just thought… maybe it’d feel different. Less like I’m with strangers. Maybe it’d feel like I’m with you."

"Bucky," you said, your voice heavy with disbelief, "that’s not a solution. That’s… whatever that is, it’s insane."

His shoulders sagged slightly, and he ran a hand through his hair, his fingers tugging at the roots in frustration. 

“I know it sounds insane,” he muttered, his tone rough. “But I’m trying to find a way to make this work. To make this easier for you.”

You shook your head, letting out a long breath. You stared at Bucky, your frustration and disbelief simmering just beneath the surface. 

“Me… doing that with you? Just so I can handle this better?”

He sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. 

“I know it sounds crazy. Trust me, I know. But I hate the thought of you being upset every time I have to perform. And yeah, maybe it’s a selfish thought, but if it were with you… at least it’d feel real. Like it means something.”

You bit your lip, his words tugging at something inside you. But the idea of putting yourself in front of a camera, of having your body displayed for the world—it made your stomach churn. "Bucky, that’s not… I don’t know if I could ever do that. It’s not me. It’s not what I want people to see of me."

He nodded slowly, his hands fidgeting in his lap. "I get that," he said softly. "But if it’s the only way to make this easier for you… I just thought—"

"You thought what?" you interrupted, cutting him off. "That I’d suddenly be okay with the idea of putting my body out there for millions of people to see? That I’d somehow be okay sharing you like that, even if it’s just on-screen?"

Bucky flinched at your tone, his jaw tightening. "I don’t want you to share me. I don’t want any of this to be a problem for us. But you don’t trust that I’m serious about you, and I’m just trying to find a way to show you."

You let out a shaky breath, your thoughts spinning. He wasn’t wrong—it was hard to trust, hard to believe that someone with a job like his could be serious about anyone, let alone you. But his suggestion… it wasn’t the answer. Was it?

For a moment, you considered something that had never crossed your mind before. The idea was ludicrous, insane even, but it lingered in the back of your thoughts like a whisper. Your lips parted hesitantly, the words tasting strange on your tongue as you said them.

"If I agreed… hypothetically," you started, your voice faltering slightly, "would I… would I have to show my face?"

Bucky blinked, taken aback by your question. For a moment, his expression softened, a mix of relief and regret washing over his face. 

“It’s only a suggestion. . . you don’t have to do this, if you’re uncomfortable." he said, his voice quiet but firm. “I just… I threw it out there because I’m desperate to find a way to make this work.”

You exhaled, shaking your head. 

“I don’t know. But the thought of you with someone else… it makes me sick. And now I feel like I’m stuck, like there’s no winning in this situation.”

Bucky studied you for a long moment, his blue eyes filled with understanding. You could see him weighing his next words carefully, as if they could tip the balance in either direction.

Finally, he broke the silence, his voice soft yet steady. “You know what? Forget I said any of that,” he said, his lips quirking into a small, almost sheepish smile. “It’s too much for tonight. For both of us.”

You blinked, caught off guard by his sudden shift in tone. “Bucky—”

“No,” he interrupted gently, shaking his head. “I’m serious. I don’t want you to feel like this has to be some big, impossible decision right now. We’re both exhausted from this conversation, and I don’t want to mess it up any more than I already have.”

You felt a lump form in your throat, a mix of relief and guilt swirling in your chest. He was giving you an out, a way to step back from the overwhelming weight of it all, and you weren’t sure whether to thank him or cry.

“How about this,” Bucky said, leaning forward slightly, his tone softer now. “Let’s just… hit pause for tonight. Tomorrow, we’ll do something normal. Something simple. Let’s go on a date—no heavy talks, no complicated feelings. Just us.”

Your eyes searched his, finding nothing but sincerity in his gaze. It wasn’t an easy fix, and it wouldn’t erase the doubts or the fears that still lingered between you. But it was a step forward, a way to reconnect without the weight of everything else pressing down on you both.

“A date?” you asked, your lips twitching into a hesitant smile.

“Yeah,” he said, his smile growing a little. “Somewhere fun, somewhere we can just… breathe. No drama, no cameras, just you and me.”

You let out a soft laugh, shaking your head. “You make it sound so easy.”

Bucky’s grin widened, and he shrugged, a teasing glint in his eye. “That’s because it can be. We don’t have to solve everything at once, Y/N. We just have to take it one step at a time.”

You nodded slowly, feeling the tension in your chest loosen ever so slightly. 

“Alright,”you said, your voice steadying. “Tomorrow, we’ll go on a date.”

Bucky’s smile was warm and genuine, and for a moment, the weight of the evening lifted. 

"Awesome," he said, standing up and offering you his hand. "Now, let me walk you up. Can’t let you carry bag on your own."

You laughed softly, taking his hand as he helped you to your feet. As the two of you walked back into your building, the night air seemed a little lighter. Although at the back of your thought, a question lingers. Should you agree to his suggestion?

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