#sorry this isnt shaded if i looked at this any longer i was going to puke
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the-land-of-dreams ¡ 1 year ago
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FORGOT TO UPLOAD THIS LIKE SIX MILLION TIMES IM SO SORRY
art i did of @bojackandherb 's ghost bojack au! i am. so normal about it........
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ghxstyfae ¡ 9 months ago
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Jake Webber coquette girl? 😻‼️
Hi cutie🫶🏻 just did some headcanons for ya<3
Pearly Kisses ♡ J.Webber
Synopsis: headcanons of Jake Webber and his coquette gf
Warnings: 18 + under labelled section, cigarettes, let me know if i missed anything
Masterlist
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Sfw
These two are like night and day, aesthetically speaking.
This causes them get looks (mostly from old ppl) wherever they go
Jake 'steals' her makeup
Sometimes when shes getting ready in the morning, sitting at her vanity with a fluffy headband and dozens of skincare and makeup products, he'll just sit on the floor beside her and watch
Makeup all over his bedsheets, especially mascara and lipsticks
"Jakey my dress doesnt have any pockets!! Can you keep my lipstick, wallet and phone in yours? Pretty please"
And of course he will, but tells her to leave her wallet at home because ?? Obviously hes gonna pay for anything she would need, and he's driving anywhere she needs to go.
Takes her to get her nails done on routine, he makes a whole day of it.
First, the appointment, if its a longer one he might leave for a bit and bring back some food for her and her tech. Next, they'll either go to get food if they havent already eaten, or some kinda drink (dunkin, tims, maccas, etc). Then they go shopping or thrifting, and finish the evening with dinner
Feels so out of place in her bedroom at first. Pastel pink, white, and cream shades were they only colours in her room + its full of clean, fluffy blankets and stuffies
"Jake theres literally a huge wine stain on my rug and empty snack wrappers everywhere idc if you make a mess"
But within a month half his tiktoks have a girly background because he records them while hes waiting for her to be done her makeup.
Jake now actively listens to Lana del rey on a daily basis, and his spotify wrapped will have atleast one of her songs on it
Sometimes, if gf happens to smoke, they share a cigarette and she leaves a lipstick stain on it
Speaking of, lipstick stains on his cheeks, neck, forehead, etc 24/7
Jake plans on getting her kiss mark tattooed on his neck after they get married
Nsfw
Likes to have her ride his cock in her tiny little miniskirts, will play with the bows in her hair and praise her for being such a good girl for him
Corruption kink goes brrr
Loves seeing tou all dolled up for him just so he can destroy it🤭
Valentines day special: bought her some cute lingerie and covered the room in pink flower petals, lit some candles and they had a beautiful dinner. He proceeds to absolutely WRECK her.
Would actually go FERAL if gf happened to have some kinda womb tattoo/trapstamp . just saying.
Hey, their isnt too many and they arent very good, so Im so sorry my love. I really hope you still enjoy though<3 if you'd like, id love to make a part two
My masterlist
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cynthiesjmxazrielslover ¡ 3 months ago
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Bittersweet love
An original AUmodernAzriel x Reader
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these songs remind me of them <3333
Warnings: Mentions of abuse, mention of trauma Summary: Growing up with your abusive father and your mother who never spoke up against him, you had truly given up hope of any chance of a real relationship, of real love, the ones of the kind that you read about in your books, till you're proven wrong.
A/N: this is my first fic ever+english isnt my first language, and I wrote this in a daze, the idea came to me at like 3 AM,so....enjoy muah<3 Thump.....thump. DAMN IT CAROLINE GET OUT HERE! Another night another fight, that too on their anniversary, a classic. I scoff thinking about all the picture-perfect smiles and the absolutely lovely speech my dad had read out for my mom tonight, a show, it was all a show, no one knew what went inside our house every week, how my dad hit my mom, screamed at her and then bought ridiculously expensive gifts for her as if that would fix everything. I was so so tired of their useless fights, every time it all ended the same way, with my mom never leaving. I heard the rain outside before I saw it. One thing about me was that I always loved the rain, growing up, and till now it just felt right to cry under its cover, to cry with it, to admire how beautiful it felt to be enveloped in her comfort and just...let everything go. I sneaked out my window and walked out of our backyard. There was an abandoned house right behind mine, I spread rumors just so everyone thought, it was either haunted or inhabited, in truth it was my den. Snacks, clothes, comfy blankets, duvets, you name it. It had all I needed to feel better. When I entered my lair I noticed that most of my snacks were empty and the empty packets pristine clean. Oh no, someone had discovered the truth, I turned around only to find a pair of hazel eyes staring back at me, the darkness enveloped him, I couldn't see him, but guessed well enough he was taller than me. I cursed at myself for being stupid enough to enter an abandoned place at night in the middle of a heavy down pour. No, no, no, no. I stepped back I couldn't die like this, not in this shit hole. "Um, hello there. Are you okay? you just seem a little pale" I gaped at him. He had the most alluring voice id ever heard on a man and damn did it mess with my senses. "I won't hurt you, I promise. Look I'm not armed plus I dont even have enough energy to argue right now." He stepped a bit closer enough that I could make out his silhouette illuminated by the moonlight. His hazel eyes were a sweet honey brown shade, tanned skin, muscles, tall as frick, and hot too. Holy crap this guy looked straight out of a book. "Hello?". Realizing I'd been gaping at it the whole time it took me second to remember the situation I'd found myself in before I said "Hi, Im Lana" I lied, my name wasnt lana but i wasnt gonna tell some random guy who ate my snacks AND all my blueberry sour candy my name, Im not that dumb. He steps out of the shadows so i could get a proper look at him, and so he could look at me i realize. "Hello Lana, Im Azriel". I looked at him, really looked at him noticed 3 things, 1. He didnt look much older than me, meaning either he was in school or in college, 2. He was wearing my oversized hoodie which looked a little too small on him, and 3. He looked in a bad shape. He had bruises on his face marring his body, burned hands, swollen eye and looked cold, very cold and malnourished. He looked almost......homeless.
I snuck a glance outside.
I silently swore, if this man- Azriel, stayed here any longer he would DIE, either of fever or due to infection. I might already have brought a one way ticket to the deepest darkest pits of hell but doesnt mean he did. Without a thought i spit out "Come to my house". "Im sorry what?" he chuckled out smirking at me as a flush crept over me. "I-I meant that you cant stay here, there's heavy rain and its cold here. pfft that's totally what i meant" i stammer out. Reminder to curl up and die in a corner later on. He furrows his brow at my statement, a hint of amusement on his face. "Haven't you heard of stranger danger Lana?" He pipes out, his voice low and gravelly. "I doubt an 18 year old guy who wears Minnie Mouse hoodies with dora the explorer socks and a pink bow pajamas would try to kidnap me" Okay now this dude was really crossing it for me. Reminder number 2- Drown these clothes in holy water before wearing them again. Now it was his turn to be embarrassed. "I still look better in these than you could ever. But you're smart and these clothes fit me like a fucking tank top and shorts, so yes, Lana, I'll come to your house. Only because Im freezing out here" He added FRICK. FRICK THIS WAS A BAD,BAD IDEA
Azriels POV I stepped out of the shower, steam rising from the hot water. I smelled like lavender soap and vanilla- The scent of real men. I put on the fresh pair of clothes Lana gave me, A little smaller than what i wore but better than those hoodies of hers anyway. I saw her reading a book when i stepped out, no gods not another book-obsessed psycho. She motioned for me to sit down and applied some bandages, honey, and anti-septic cream and gave me some medecine, pain killers i guessed. She seemed to know what she was doing, better than going to a doctor if it meant it was free and she wasn't going- "Who gave you get these" My chain of thoughts are interrupted by her words. "I got myself banged up by a....raccoon?" A raccoon? A RACCOON? Thats the best I could come up with? Telling a girl that i got banged up by a raccoon? She laughs at my answer. It's not a soft melodic sound like i expected but a burst of laughter. She snorts and smirks at me. "Damn, a raccoon huh? Wait,does that mean your're pregnant now?Plus,what? did it tackle you to the ground with its little toe beans? What were you even fighting over, who gets the last thrown out doughnuts from the dumpster, oh, or, did she kick you out of the house instead? You're lovely raccoon wife." She laughs out, barely able to form the sentence without controlling her laughter. I roll my eyes but I cant help smile, I knew very little about this girl but i did know 4 things, 1. She was a terrible liar, introducing herself under a fake name when her name was written under every single one of her drawings, 'y/n' I liked that name, it sounded different yet familiar on my tongue. 2.She might have just saved my life 3. She had a very good taste in candy and 4. we are about to become very, very, very good friends, something I hadn't had in a while. Tell me in the comments if you want to be tagged in the next parts, plus im open to supportive constructive criticism so let me know how i can improve =) taglist: @anarchiii @starlightazriel @velarisdusk @siriuslystyle1989 @scorpioriesling
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puhpandas ¡ 9 months ago
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@ggyweek2024 Day 1: Scars
(2,434 words)
After developing a new normal, Tony finally asks Gregory about how he got the scar on his face.
One of the first blaring changes that Tony noticed about Gregory when seeing him again after so long was his scar.
Tony couldnt help but stare when he first saw it. It was thick and jagged, and discolored a darker shade than his skin. It was large, jarring on his face, and travelled from his jaw across his cheek to his nose.
And even after they had the big long talk about everything and discussed and debunked and explained, Gregory never told him how he got the scar.
It took Tony a while to feel normal enough around Greg to go to his house a lot. It's more common than not, now, for Tony to go to Greg's after school and get to know him. The real him.
But through it all, Tony's never gathered the courage to ask Greg about the long jagged line taking up a quarter of his face.
Its been weeks, now, since they reunited. Possibly months, and Tony hasnt asked Greg about it in that long.
Its never felt right to. Even when things were still centered around what happened enough to reveal that much, it had been too soon, and any time afterwards, Tony was just happy to be friends with Greg again. He never wanted to mess up any normalcy and his relationship for Greg to satisfy his own curiosity.
He already learned his lesson about that.
Today's one of the days he goes over to Greg's to hang out. The standard routine continues as normal; Tony bikes to Gregory's house, parks, goes inside and greets Vanessa and Freddy on his way to Greg's room, who both greet him back enthusiastically, and then he goes in.
When Tony enters Gregory's room, he immediately finds him hunched over at his desk. His back is facing Tony, and even from his point of view he can see Gregory's arm moving back and forth in a scribbling motion. He doesnt seem to hear him come in. He's so engrossed in whatever he's drawing he's almost nose to nose with the surface of the desk.
Instinctively, a smile quirks on Tony's face. He shuts the door quietly behind him, and goes over to Greg's chair.
Gregory only seems to notice him when he's in his peripherals. He jolts slightly, eyes widening in suprise, but then hes smiling and setting down his pencil.
"Jeez," Greg chuckles. "You scared me."
"Sorry." Tony replies. The window is open and the blinds are open by Gregory's desk, and it casts a few lines against Greg's face and his paper. Tony switches his gaze to Gregorys latest drawing, and smiles again.
It's some comic centered around Gregory and Freddy taking down a bad guy. The panels are dramatic and scary looking, and Tony notices that near the end of the page, in the right bottom corner, theres a panel where Gregory is completely alone.
He's interrupted by Gregory calling his name.
Tony looks back over, and the sunlight peeking through the blinds somehow manages to cast a perfect halo around the scar on Greg's face. It's like the world somehow knows that Tony's been stewing in curiosity about it lately.
Tony must have been looking at it, because when he tears his gaze away to look at Gregory himself, he shuts his mouth from where he was about to say something and darts his eyes to the side. His hand comes up to his cheek.
"Sorry." Tony says again. He looks at the floor.
One moment, then, "Its okay." Gregory drops his hand after a few seconds of silence. "Did you come over to finish our book? We only have a couple chapters left, I think. I saw that the second series is way longer."
Tony smiles again. "Yeah." He confirms. "Are you reading or am I?"
"You read last time." Gregory gets up from his chair, leaving his comic and colored pencils behind. "I'll do it this time."
Tony still feels bad about making Greg uncomfortable, but Gregory seems to have moved past it. He sighs. "Okay, sure. This is the last book, isnt it?"
"The last in series one." Gregory replies, moving to his bookshelf. Tony watches him go. "Funny how we only started reading because you wanted a reference to start writing first person, and now we're going to start series two."
Tony smiles, knowing why exactly he kept reading for so long. Of course he's inspired by the first person point of view, but theres another reason he likes reading the books so much. "Its a good series."
Gregory plucks the book off of his shelf and makes his way over to his bed. Tony follows him, and they sit side by side, leaning against Greg's pillow as he opens to the bookmarked page.
Tony's on Gregory's right side, meaning that Tony has perfect view of his face scar when he leans down to see the pages clearly. He sighs out his nose, trying his best to ignore it. Greg's obviously uncomfortable with it. He thinks. He doesnt need to tell me. I dont need to know.
While Gregory is finding their last page, Tony thinks about how hes never told Gregory how he got his own face scar. The thin pale line on his right cheek.
But then he remembers that he doesnt need to tell him, because Gregory already knows how Tony got the scar.
"Here." Gregory rips him out of his thoughts, pointing at the page. He clears his throat, and Tony tries to ignore the proximity, and how Gregory's face scar is in his peripherals.
"I looked around to make sure we were alone." Gregory starts reading. "Then I leaned in close and whispered: "My Achilles spot. If you hadn't taken that knife, I would have died.
She got a faraway look in her eyes. Her breath smelled of grapes, probably from the nectar. "I dont know, Percy. I just had this feeling you were in danger. Where...where is the spot?""
The word knife makes Tony think again, even when he tries to pay attention to the story. Tony's own face scar was made by a knife. His eyes dart back to Greg's cheek.
"I wasn't supposed to tell anyone." Greg's voice echoes in his room. "But this was Annabeth. If I couldnt trust her, I couldn't trust anyone.
"The small of my back.""
"Greg." Tony interrupts impulsively, not tearing his eyes away from the discolored line on Gregory's face. Gregory stops reading, twisting his neck to look at him. When Greg looks him in his eyes, Tony switches his gaze to look back. "Uh... can I ask you something?"
Gregory seems to deflate a slight bit, but Tony only notices because he's watching closely.
Greg sighs almost soundlessly, then: "My scar."
Tony jolts, his eyes wide. He glances to the side. "Oh, um--"
"I know that's what you're going to ask about." Gregory interrupts. Tony risks a glance back, the inklings of guilt in his stomach, but Gregory doesn't look angry, upset, or uncomfortable. Just kind of resigned, but in the least worst way. "Its okay."
Gregory shuts the book, only pausing to place the bookmark back in. "Is it okay?" Tony asks. He wouldn't want anyone prying for answers about his face scar. He hopes that Greg wont mind as much because its Tony.
"I see you looking at it all the time." Gregory tells him, shifting in his seat to angle his body so he's fully facing Tony. Tony forces himself to look him in the eye. "I know how you are. It's probably killing you, isnt it?"
Tony tries not to let his jolt show at those choice of words from Gregs mouth, and he nods. "Sorry." He apologizes. "I just--"
"You cant stand not solving a mystery." Gregory interrupts again. He fidgets in his seat. "I get it."
Tony doesnt respond again. He just stares, and watches how Gregory is looking away from him when it falls silent. He looks at how Gregory's face is tilted so the scar is in perfect view for Tony, and how his fingers fidget with the strap of his watch and how his knees seem to tremor ever so slightly.
He waits. In the silence, he can hear the TV in the living room droning on through the walls. He can hear the barely audible exhaust from cars from outside. He can hear his own heartbeat in his chest, and he can feel his own guilt for being excited to be told.
"Its..." Gregory's voice is jarring in the silence. He looks back at Tony, and there are lines under his amber eyes. "Its not a fun story. Might... might remind you of some things."
Gregs eyes had darted to the right side of Tony's face when he said that, and Tony's brows raise. He's suddenly hyper aware of his own face scar.
He looks at Greg's, sharp and large and jagged. It dips in his skin around his jaw, and it makes the skin around his left eye stretch differently. Its darker against his tanned skin, and Tony sighs out. "That's okay."
Tony doesn't notice how Gregory never worried about trusting Tony.
"Vanessa was like me." Gregory jumps right in. "She had a knife, and I just woke up with no memory, and she just..."
He trails off, making a slashing motion with his hand. "I barely got away with my life." He says, his voice slightly wet. "If I was just a little slower..."
His eyes get faraway, and Tony, in between his shock and taking that in, bravely reaches out a hand and sets it on Gregory's fidgeting one.
His hand is warm against Tony's icy fingers, and it's enough to bring him back to reality. He gasps a little, and Tony catches that same expression that he used to think made Gregory look so young a year ago.
Tony doesnt bring up his own scar, because he knows Gregory knows how it came to be. It was from a knife, too, and Tony barely got away with his life.
Greg's other hand has been raised to his face, where he messes with the scar on his cheek. Theres a few fleeting moments where Gregory and Tony look at nothing but eachothers eyes, and it feels like it lasts hours.
Tony sees how Gregory unsubtly looks away from Tony's eyes to his right cheek.
Gregory's fingers twitch under Tony's hand. Tony watches Gregory remove his other hand from his face, reach out, and barely brushing against his skin, poke the spot on Tony's cheek.
"We match." Greg says, soft as silk. He smiles, but it looks pained.
Tony cant find a response in him, he just keeps staring, and realizing for the first time how Gregory's right.
It feels otherworldly, Tony thinks, or fictional, how Tony and Greg somehow have matching scars on their cheeks that are parallel to eachother. It reminds him, boldly, of how Freddy and Bonnie have parallel matching earrings.
But they were designed that way. Tony and Gregory somehow got here by chance. Are they this way because of the worlds design? Is it fate that both their cheeks were marked by that thing?? That the fact that they have scars at all tells that they're still here? That Tony would look in the mirror and stare at the pale line on his face in-between it all to remind himself that it was all real, and his theories weren't far-fetched? That he wasnt going mad?
"I have another," Gregory rips him out of his thoughts, tapping on his hand, and Tony realizes his eyes were unfocusing. "on my stomach."
Tony feels a surge of panic when Greg lifts his shirt, but he looks back from where he averted his eyes to where Gregory is pointing.
Theres a gathering of skin on his stomach. It's long and horizontal, almost diagonal, and discolored like his face scar. It's a line, Tony realizes. A big one. Tony's mouth parts, and he looks at Greg's eyes.
"When I freed her." Gregory looks away. "She got me again."
Tony doesnt respond, he just looks at the bunch of skin on Gregory's stomach. It obviously used to be a stab wound. One of Tony's biggest fears is stab wounds.
He shakes his head, clearing his throat and trying not to stutter. "I have one." Tony says. He shrugs off his jacket, tossing the green corduroy at the end of the bed, and he rolls up the sleeve of his raglan tee.
"Y-- Rab got me." Tony says, pointing at his bicep, where just under his shoulder on the side, theres a thick, long slice. He feels it with his finger, and it dips in the skin, dark like both of Gregory's are. "He tried to stab me in the back, but I dodged."
Greg stares at it for a long time, and his eyes look infinitely more tired.
He eventually shifts, and uses his other hand (the one not beneath Tony's) to move his hair out of the way near his temple. He tucks it behind his ear, pointing at a small scar right at his hairline. Its almost lined up perfectly with the corner of his eye. "One of-- Rabs lenses shattered, once." He explains. "It almost blinded me."
Tony sighs through his nose, feeling his eyebrows furrow.
Theres so many. Gregory has so many scars littered around his body.
Tony squeezes his hand.
He shows Gregory more scars of his, which are few. He eventually gets to the old childhood ones with funny and embarrassing stories attached to them, and he stops giving Greg room to reveal more of his scars. Tony can see little light lines and dots scattered around his arms and hands, and another bigger one peeking from under his shirt sleeve, but Gregory never gets to tell the stories of those. Tony just tells him about how the scar under his chin is from tripping at the pool when he was eight, and that the one on his ankle is from a scooter rearing back at him from a failed trick when he was nine.
Greg doesnt try to unearth all of the scars hes collected again. He just laughs at Tony's stories until tears prick his eyes, and the book sits un-re-opened next to them as the sky darkens outside Gregory's window. The lines under Gregorys eyes recede, and Tony's shirt sleeve starts to fall back down his arm.
Through it all, Tony never moves his hand from on top of Greg's, and Gregory doesnt move his either.
ao3 link
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minahoeshi ¡ 3 years ago
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you were loved the most of all.
Ushijima Wakatoshi x reader | break-up angst
summary: You should've known that when Ushijima Wakatoshi found it easy to fall in love with you, it might be even easier for him to fall out of it. But who expects the worst when it comes to loving someone as seemingly perfect as him, anyway?
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Chapter 1 of 2
Chapter 2 of 2
He said it was easy to fall in love with you. He said he didn’t know when exactly, at which place, nor for what reason. Simply one day, Ushijima Wakatoshi found himself looking at you with the epiphany that maybe there’s something more meant to happen between you and him. There you stood before him that day, the person he could promise love to. (And there he stood before you that moment, the boy whose promises you found yourself believing in no matter what.)
So maybe that’s why it was even easier for him to fall out of love. When he told you he was no longer in love with you, it didn’t matter to you to ask when exactly, at which place, or for what reason. Even the universe itself is meant to fizzle out one day along with the death of the stars. Just one more person drifting away from you like a lone planet with no real orbit shouldn’t leave you broken. You are used to this. You won’t fall apart.
But you break anyway.
It was snowing outside when he decided to tell you to end things now before it hurts both of you even further. Not that the snow has anything to do with the coldness creeping up your chest threatening to spill out of you in endless sobs. You were glad, though. That at the very least, he remained honest with his feelings. He never left you guessing. Every time, he never forgets to tell you what’s on his mind. His honesty is something he thought was necessary.
“I understand, don’t worry. Thank you for telling me right away. I know you���re also considering me–” you tell him and choke up. There are tears running down your face but you’re not worried about that. Wakatoshi never let you mask your emotions around him. For the longest time, he reminded you to feel free to be completely bare with him. All the good and the bad, he said. Don’t be afraid to show them to me. I will always understand.
He steps closer and puts you between his arms. You feel his chin on top of your head as you lean your face into his chest. You’re sobbing now. “I’ll be fine, Toshi. We’ll be fine.”
He kisses the top of your head and lets you stay in his arms for minutes. “I loved you then, and I love you still. It’s just that they’re no longer the same kind. I will stay if you ask me to, okay? Anything you want.”
This only makes you cry harder. He’s always been too good. And even in breaking your heart, he’s too good. You want him to hold on. You want to ask him to stay with you for years and years. Even with a different kind of love, you’ll let him be as long he’s close by. But someone like him who has dreams beyond yourself shouldn’t ever be with someone like you who still lacks certainty toward anything.
“Just for tonight,” you ask, still crying. “Can I stay?”
“of course,” he replies. Anytime you want. Anything you want. It has always been this way.
Because humans are creatures of routines and familiarity, you spend that night the way you usually do when you’re at his place. You cook dinner with him and eat on the dining table, sharing stories and laughter. You keep adding food to his plate and he smiles as you giggle at everything you find funny.
It’s okay, it’s okay. You’ll be okay. You’ll be fine.
You clean the kitchen and stay in the living room. He leans on the couch as you lay down with your head on his lap. You keep talking and laughing. He goes along, sometimes adding things to make you laugh even more, sometimes simply agreeing, sometimes asking questions. You keep it loud and light, afraid of the silence. Inside you, it’s so heavy, your heart might just fall off. This will be the last, you tell yourself. You want to be happy for now. While he’s still here.
"Do me a favor, okay?" You tell him as you're nearing slumber. "Let me leave first tomorrow. Maybe stay in bed, maybe pretend you're asleep. But tomorrow, don't get out of the room until I've left the house." Your voice shakes, feeling yourself wanting to sob.
"I don't want to wake up to another empty bed but I don't want to see your face when I wake up too," you curl into him even further. "I'm sorry for being selfish. I'm sorry I still don't really know what to do. And I know you wake up pretty early and you know, do stuff, but just for tomorrow, please?"
Wakatoshi didn't really understand why. He originally planned on cooking breakfast for you and taking you to the train station. He would watch you board the train and he'd make sure to smile at you as he waves. You always waved back. That's how it works. Even after fights, and even after especially bad nights, you'd still do the same. Watching you leave with a smile was how you both knew you'd still be fine the days after. That nothing much can affect your relationship. For years, this has been the routine.
But tomorrow, he knows he has to give way. He knows what he said hurt you. It would be wrong of him to do what he wants simply because he's used to.
Tomorrow's the last, he realises. And then if you want, he'd never see you again.
--
You wake up pretty early. The sky is a calm shade of blue, the world outside still waking up. You check the time on your phone and find it's 6 AM. Last night, you slept with your back on him. The sight before you is the other end of his bedroom and you notice just how much of yourself you've managed to leave around his place. Pieces of just one other person in his life, scattered in places around his world pretending that’s just where they belong. You didn't mind leaving things behind back then. You never really thought of the day that you might’ve to take back all of them. Just how does one pick up parts of themselves when they thought they’ve finally found a place for them to stay?
But as you stand up, you conclude that when things end, traces shouldn’t be left behind. He didn’t decide to break up only to be reminded of you even after you’re no longer close to him. So you go and pick every little thing that's yours. Even your jacket and sweaters and a few pairs pyjamas in his closet. You'll just take his things from your place too and hand it to Tendou's shop. Coming back here won’t do you any good. Him coming to your place instead wouldn’t either.
Collecting all your things, even the ones you can't use anymore, you leave the bedroom and enter the living room. You don't have many belongings here aside from some DVDs and books. You only take the books and leave the rest for him. You've always preferred reading anyway.
Setting your bag and things aside on the sofa, you go ahead and wash yourself in the bathroom and bring your toothbrush and some other products with you when you're done. You then head to the kitchen to cook him something light to eat for breakfast . You knew you didn't have to. He knows how to cook. It has always been him cooking breakfast for you. When you could, you’d rather stay in bed until the very moment you must start preparing to go to uni or work. But you did anyway. He's probably in his bed, awake. He has never been a heavy sleeper. With all the moving you did around his room, he was bound to wake up if he wasn't already.
You make him a simple omelette and write a small message on top of it with ketchup. "Good luck with practice today!"
You've already cleaned everything you used, preferring to wash and set utensils as soon as you're done with them. That way, when you're sitting down to eat, there won't be any cluster around to distract you.
You put the ketchup down and decide that should be enough. You'll stop here. You should go now.
Ushijima is sitting on his bed. He's been awake since 5 AM when he usually goes on his run. It isn't the first time he chose to stay with you instead of going out, but he can't help but feel heavy this time. He stayed in for you. But as the minutes pass by, it seems that he simply cannot find the courage to sit up and face you.
He wants to sink into his bed.
There's knock on the door followed by sentences uttered softly. "Toshi, I'm going now. There's breakfast on the table. Make sure to eat before you go."
There goes the heavy feeling again. Maybe if this keeps up, he might just actually sink and never get back up.
You've done that a few times. Leaving while he's still in the room. You don't even open the door. You simply knock and tell him you're about to go, always reminding him to eat before he goes too.
But this will be the last, he thinks. If you leave now, will he never see you again?
a/n
chapter 2 will be up soon not rly sure when tho. (it's up now the link is at the top)
also, im not entirely sure but i think i didnt use any pronouns or gendered nouns for this except "girl" in the 1st paragraph which i erased just now? if i'm right, then i hope everyone reading this get to feel as though theyre rly the person in the story. unless ofc u dont want that bc this isnt the happiest ushitoshi x reader fic u can find🥲. but thanks for reading!!!! m so sorry for typos nd other errors as well. i kinda cant read my own writings bc sometimes doing so makes me wanna smack myself in the head and never write again nd i hate that so now im leaving my mistakes to the gods nd hope they love me enough or smth. but yes thank u sm again for reading!!!!
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bellamyblakru ¡ 3 years ago
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a very beginner’s guide to gif making (ashley’s version)
(ill be using one of my favorite merthur smiles in this example from 4x01 when they are alone together with the dorocha)
for @its-hyperfixation​ and @mykingdomcomeundone !! sorry its taken me so long to do this sigh this was my first free night lately 😭😭
download free ad blocker (i use uBlock Origin). pls dont skip this step, it protects you and your computer from the bad ads!!
go to a completely “free website” aka illegal lol. i use yes.movies because that is what im used to, but you can use whatever one you prefer. 
go to merlin bbc, click the episode you want, and record. on my “not as cool HP computer”, i have to click the windows flag button and the key “g” to record my screen, but your computer might have a button for it already to just go right to recording. if you are not sure, google your computer type and how to screen record (its fast to learn!!)
THE SHORTER THE SCENE THE BETTER! tumblr only takes up to 10mb gifs, so normally thats up to 3.5 second scenes if you color them too. however, if you are doing black and white, you can get away with longer scenes (this is what i did for my very first gifset actually LOL they were eight seconds long dude)
go to this website to convert to gif: https://ezgif.com/video-to-gif
chose the file of the video where asked, upload, then where it says: Frame rate (FPS) select 33 (max 10 seconds) for a better quality gif, and convert
WOO your first gif!! this process isnt done, but im proud you got this far!! 🥰
now, go to resize. this is important since tumblr gifs are usually up to 540 width and 330 height (these are my normal go-to proportions). lately, ive been liking the more square looks, so 540:340 or 540:440 works too! if your gif has too many movements, a square look might not be the best choice. (if you are doing two side by side gifs i recommend 268:230, and if you are doing three side by side 177:177 works best (learned from maria my beloved)). you dont need to change anything else here. (if your gif is over 10mb for some reason, you can optimize -> lossy gif and go in small units to not ruin the quality too much). 
now, i like to make my gifs a bit slower to make it more like a slow moment in time. press speed if you wanna do this and explore different settings!! i like to do 80% usually, but here i did 70%. here is what we have so far:
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not too bad!! but as you can see, this scene is rather dark and gloomy and their smiles deserves something better in my opinion, so OFF TO PHOTOPEA WE GO (free photoshop my beloved)
10.  now we are at https://www.photopea.com/ and click file and open up our bad boy. DONT BE INTIMIDATED!! there are so, so many choices, but it is solely up to your preference and desired look. i like my gifs bright and saturated, but you might not, and thats okay!! you can fuck with all of these things over time (i do still LOL)
11. THE BASICS: go to layer -> new adjustment layer -> color balance. you do this layer first if you are going to use it at all. you’ll soon find that merlin has a very yellow early seasons and an extremely blue later seasons (it drives me crazy), so here is where you just mess with them til you get a baseline look you like. i start with shadows and go up from there (i dont change too intense ever. i go up or down like 6/7 the most on blue or red at any gif tbh). for this gif im working on, i want it to look less blue, so ill focus on the blue mostly.
i also put selective color as one of the first layers, and here you can fuck with all the colors if you wanna make one a different shade or hue or make something pop or darken. it is a beloved layer im ngl
12. now, remember all of these steps are optional and this is just the order i go, but that is not the only way. do what you feel makes the gif to your liking!! i then go to selective color (i like doing the contrast with the black coloring option here more than the choice later, but it up to you). i mostly make most of the colors darker here so the lightening later looks a bit cleaner.
13. next for me is the hue/saturation layer. i normally try to avoid using this, but it may be needed if you want to make the gif a bit less red or smth like that. if i want one particular to be really saturated, ill do that here at this level. its good to put this third tho if you are gonna use it.
14. vibrance layer time!! i love this bitch. i go ham with it fnesfljesfk i like my stuff really saturated (like “i went up 45″ hard). i dont usually use the actually vibrance option on top since i read in a post by the incredible maria that it makes gifs more grainy (btw @arthurpendragonns taught me like so much. her gifs are TOP TIER and literally take my breath away every time. so fucking talented man. the goddess of gifmaking, if you will).
15. then i click brightness/contrast and THROW THAT BRIGHTNESS UPPPP. here i just went up to 126 LOL. (this is where my comment about the selective color comes up. you can do contrast here, but i think it looks better if you increase the black in the black selective color option. again, up to you)
16. CURVES LAYER MY BELOVED. i literally just fuck with the curve on RGB until i like it lolol
17. im going back to the hue/saturation to make the blue pop more since it is so much in the background!! and then just fuck with them all to get something you like!! this gif is making me upset so i redid it rn lnrelkjfrmf 
18. ADD TEXT IF YOU WANT!! we can do blending two gifs together and fun text stuff next time if you want in another list (lmk!! ill do anything if u want it).
19. woo! she done now. onto the next gif to start this over, or one and done! ive never done this kind of tutorial before, in the past ive just went live on my discord and some people have sat in to watch the process, so let me know if you wanna join my server to do this, too, if you are more of a watch learner than reading!!
20: the final product (not my best work frdiusnr im sorry ive been writing this up for like three hours LOL)
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le0watch ¡ 3 years ago
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langa grimaces as he steps out of his carriage, shoes chuffing against the pavement ground. the sounds of downtown london fills his ears, ranging from the chitchat of workers and civilians to the clomping of horse's hooves on the streets. it's raining today- of course it has to be raining. why wouldn't it be on his already least favorite day of the week?
his servant steadily holds an umbrella over his and his mother's heads to keep the raindrops from drenching them. he, of course, isnt saved from getting wet, but this is his job. langa will just make sure to pay him extra for his work this month, and make sure that he doesn't catch a cold from the cool breezes brushing by.
today, he and his mother are visiting the busy streets of london per her request. since langa's father died and the large erikson heritage was passed down to langa, shes been asking him for numerous favors, including this weekly walk through the busy, muggy streets of london.
now, langa doesn't hate the people or the peasants or whatever you want to call them. he's just not a fan of the constant rain and loud chatter of said people around him. they're all incredibly loud and irritating, and sometimes he'd like them to be quiet while he and his mother are there. but that's not the point of their trips. his mother came from poverty before langa's father had found her and fallen for her, before he'd proposed to her. moving from japan to england during this time had given his mother a horrible disadvantage against any of the nobility or even white people of the lower classes.
but his father had been infatuated with her, and she became infatuated by him. they married for love, a rare occurence these days. then, they'd had him, and he loved his large home and the days he spent with his mother in the garden or the days he went with his father to the various horse stables they owned.
he can't visit the stables with his father anymore, however. because his father died a year ago, leaving their large fortune on the shoulders of langa, barely old enough to chose what happens with that wealth.
he insists in private that his mother make mistakes of the financial decisions, since he's still in the process of learning his family's buisness. she agreed to do it, in exchange for trips to the busy streets of london, where they could make donations to small charities or poor families that need the help.
honestly, it's a win win situation for langa. he doesn't have to fully handle the responsibilities of his family's fortune, and he has always wanted to help the poor, like his father. because when his father was living, he would hold monthly giveaways of some of their stables' foals to the poorest of the city.
other families of nobility often turned their noses up at what langa's father did for the poor, not that his father ever cared.
that's what probably got him killed.
"where shall we visit first, mother?" langa asks, holding his arm out for her take. she loops her arm through his, smiling up at him for his manners.
"i was thinking the orphanage down the road," she replies as they begin to walk. their servant- kaoru, langa's favorite servant and teacher- follows close behind to keep the umbrella over their heads the entire time. he wants to tell kaoru that he could cover himself with his own umbrella, but he already knows that he would be denied. kaoru has always been very serious about his job.
"as you wish," he says with a small smile.
their visit to the orphanage is longer than they'd originally intended. the owner of the orphanage needed help moving some heavier objects and boxes, and so langa had stepped in. she was instantly grateful to him, and only became moreso when he handed her a large wad of cash.
"thank you so much, mister erikson," she said, bowing low to him. his mother was in the background, entertaining the children. "are you sure there's no way we can repay you?"
"you can by taking care of the sick children here," langa replied, and she nodded eagerly.
they'd left soon afterwards, kaoru waiting outside for them. his long, pink hair is pulled back in a ponytail today, and he's wearing his favorite kamino. he was also born in japan, like his mother, and had been a friend of hers before she'd moved here. he moved not long after her, and she hired him as their servant and langa's tutor. he's been around for as long as langa could remember.
suddenly, there's a flash of red ahead of them, and a kid- not of the orphanage- rams into his side, knocking them both over in the process. langa hits the muddy ground with a grunt, before the kid is apologizing profusely, bowing his head continuously. he's in scrappy clothes, and is soaked to the bone.
"it's fine," langa tells him, and the kid relaxes. "don't worry about it." he wipes the mud from his shirt as kaoru helps him stand, and his mother hurries over to look him over. they're all soaked at this point.
"sorry again!" the kid exclaims, before running off.
with langa's donation wallet in hand.
normally, langa wouldnt bat an eye at stolen money. his family's wealth is nearly endless. but that's the money he's using for his trip with his mom today- and he doesn't have anything extra. he doesn't want to cut this trip short- his mom loves it too much.
he takes off after the kid without much thought, ignoring the calls from his mother and servant. the kid lets out a loud laugh once he notices he's being chased, before two more kids that look identical to him fall in step behind him. langa's eyes widen- they have this thought out.
they end up running through twisting alleyways, and langa is hardly keeping up. every time he gets close, they duck away or slide around another corner, throwing him off. he grits his teeth together, lungs beginning to burn from the exertion.
the kids run across a crowded street, easily weaving through its crowded traffick. langa skids you a stop just before crossing, before giving chase once more. he reaches a hand out, about to grab one of the buggers- when they suddenly leap at a building's front, scaling its side like a ladder. he stops in his tracks, gaping as they reach the roof, pointing at his with laughter.
he's so busy gaping, he doesn't even notice he's still standing in the middle of busy traffick until a coachman is shouting at him to move, with the horses screeching with terror. his heart stops beating- oh god, he's about to die like his father had, leaving his mom all alone. he already knows he won't be able to move in time.
but then something- or rather, someone- crashes into his back, knocking him to safer ground instantly. the horses and carriage roar past where he'd just been, and he pants on the ground, the person who'd saved his life still over him.
"wow- you nearly died," the person- man- above him says between pants, finally peeling away from him. langa pushes up with shaking arms, bruises and scrapes burning at his skin. geez, kaoru is going to kill him- he ripped his pants. he then looks up at his savior, and all thoughts leave his mind.
the most gorgeous man he's ever seen sits in front of him, soaked curly hair still a brilliant shade of bright red, poking out from the under side of a grey ball cap. his eyes are a beautiful honey amber, shining with mischief and a kind soul. his tan skin is peppered with freckles, along the cheeks on his face and his shoulders and forearms. he has a crooked grin as bright as the sun- making langa almost believe that it had stopped raining and the clouds had opened up. he's wearing a thin and torn short sleeved shirt, a pair of suspenders over his shoulders keeping his pair of black pants up.
lord have mercy on langa's soul. he's already fallen for the stranger that had saved his life. it didn't even matter that he was a man. langa could feel his heart thudding in his chest, and heat gathering in his cheeks. he can't even respond. luckily, the man- around his age- does it for him.
"lucky i was there to save your ass, huh?" he says with a bright chuckle. he has the same accent as his mother's and kaoru's, with a similar facial structure to both. he must be from japan too, then. langa opens and closes his mouth like a fish out of water, and the redhead's grin only widens. he reaches a hand out, wiping a splotch of mud from langa's paper white cheek. the heat in langa's cheeks worsens. the redhead then looks up at the roof where the kids are still perched at, watching with wide eyes. "they took something of yours, huh?"
"y- yeah," langa replies shakily, wanting to hit himself for sounding so pathetically like a schoolgirl with a crush. the guy doesnt seem to take notice- either that, or he doesn't point it out.
"right. be right back," the redhead says, before slipping past langa and leaping onto the side of the building. the kids at the top screech with surprise, before disappearing just as the redhead reaches the top, leaping over while calling, "tom, rick, toby- get your asses back here!"
horrifyingly, the kids leap from one rooftop to the next, somehow not slipping and falling off the edge. and even more horrifyingly, the redhead follows with amazing grace, landing perfectly, grabbing to of the kid's by their shoudlers. the third stops, dropping his head like a kid caught with their hand in the cookie jar.
"right. which of you have it," the redhead asks, loud enough for langa to hear. langa is surprised by the strength the redhead has- he's able to lift two children clear off the ground without much effort. his arms aren't shaking or wavering at all! the kids don't answer, pouting. "don't make me talk to your mum about this-"
"toby has it!" two of the kids cry out at the same time, and the third glares at them both with betrayal.
the redhead sets the two kids he's holding back down, and holds his hand out expectantly. the kid- toby- pouts some more before relunctantly dropping langa's wallet into the redhead's hand.
"thank you very much," the redhead says, pocketing langa's wallet. he points at each kid individually. "i catch you three stealing from nice men like him again, and i'll stop bringing home candy for you after work."
"no!" all three kids cry at once. the redhead tuts.
"right. don't do it again," he says firmly, before shooing the triplets away.
the redhead then slides down the side of the building, hit the wet ground with a splash. langa watches with disbelief as he casually saunters over, handing him his wallet back once he's reached him.
"sorry about them," the redhead says. "they live with just their mother, so they take to stealing to help her out occasionally. they shouldn't bug you again." he chuckles. "but if you ever need eyes and ears around london- hire those three. they're amazing at snooping."
langa clears his throat, forcing himself to stop staring at the redhead's pretty face as if he was in a trance. he slides his wallet into his suit pocket yo make sure it's not stolen again.
"thank you," he says, gratefully bowing his head. "i appreciate your help- what was your name?"
"reki kyan," the redhead replies with pride. "i work on the train tracks and take care of the kids around these parts best i can."
"well, mister kyan, you're amazing," langa tells him, surprising himself with his boldness. reki's eyes widen, and his eyes dart away quickly. langa then holds a hand out to him, the other behind his back. "my name is langa erikson. it is a pleasure to make your acquaintance."
reki chuckles awkwardly, scratching at the back of his head. "pleasure's all mine," he replied, and shakes langa's offered hand. "you can call me reki, by the way."
"then you may call me langa, reki," he responds graciously. reki averts his eyes again as they release each other's hands. "is there some way i can repay you?"
"don't worry about it!" reki says quickly, throwing his hands up. oh, he's wearing a pair of thick, black gloves, langa has just realized. and his biceps are absolutely huge with muscles- probably from working on tracks all day. "just don't get those boys in trouble. they mean well for their mum."
"wouldnt even dream of getting them in trouble," langa replies lightly. then he frowns. he doesn't want to go home and never see this sunny man ever again. he's a delight to look at- ruby red hair and honey amber eyes with a sunshine smile. it would be a shame to never seen him again. "though, i must insist on repaying you." he has a brilliant idea of doing just that, too.
reki shakes his head again, desperatly. "no, really, there's no need-"
"why don't you come and stay at my home, so that i may repay you with dinner?" langa says smoothly, once more surprising himself with his boldness. he's basically asking this man to live with him and have multiple dates with him. hopefully, the redhead doesn't realize that, yet, since gay relationships are frowned upon. but perhaps- later on. "you may stay in one of my rooms, take off from your job, and have warm and fresh meals everyday."
reki's eyes widen significantly, his jaws snapping shut. oh no, maybe langa was laying too much on him at once. "i- uh-"
"please, it would mean the world to me in repaying you this way," langa says, to further convince him. "and it would be a small exchange to you after saving my life."
the redhead scratches at the back of his head again, and langa can't help but stare at the way his bicep moves to complete the action. lord have mercy, reki was good looking. he's always tried to repress his gay feelings and desires, but this ripped train track worker with burning red hair is destroying all of his effort in one foul swoop.
finally, reki lets out a heavy sigh of defeat, lowering both of his arms. "you won't be happy unless i accept?" he asks, and when langa nods eagerly, he lets out another sigh, shutting his eyes. "okay, i will. i'll try not to be too much of an issue while i stay-"
langa cuts him off by catching one of his gloved hands in his, holding it up between them. he offers the redhead a small smile, excitement rolling in his gut. "you could be no trouble at all," langa insists, and reki draws back a little, and is that a tin of red coloring his freckled cheeks. langa sure hopes it is.
and that's how langa takes home a gorgeous redhead, who had in fact, saved his life.
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cloneslugs ¡ 3 years ago
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top 5 batsuits
not in any order bc well. anyway
good lord this got longer than expected oopsies
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this is just an honorable mention i dont like it that much like im not a fan of everything about this one but im a sucker for a purple(pink) cape i think its cute, this one is just special bc i am very like. highly prefer all black & dont particularly like the light grey body but who even cares do you see the cape? its pink(in my dreams) yellow accents are alright but who cares? do you know why it doesnt matter whether i like it or not? the man has a pink cape. sorry idrc for or like anything else about this one i just. whenever he pulled out the new suit w the colored cape when i read this years ago it did something to me i was like this rules
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this ones just a win for live action batsuits bc this was the first live action batsuit i saw and didnt immediately hate so that means something i like the all black design im in love w the cape collar , the eyemakeup under the mask is a win, i dont like the cowl cut for the mouth area i wish it was thinner and not just across the whole bottom half of his face but thats my biggest complain not show but i love the boots and glove details as well also the batarang bat symbol is very fun i hate when he has visible abs or abs built into the suit i prefer it like this w the armor plating thank you very muc
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origins is by far my fave in the series, which is maybe weird bc im usually a sucker for when he has the shorts like he has in city/asylum but this one won me over really fast maybe im a sucker for the weird crotch opening idk im usually not into the visually heavy armor but this one i really like i love the boots and thigh armor a lot, i like the cut of the torso armor, as far as open eye hole cowls go this one isnt very ugly at all which is a win i just very much enjoy this one, sorry idk why like i said im usually a sucker for the shorts but this one i am just a major fan of very pleasing to look at
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fighting for my life for a full body image i loooove the btb batsuit a lot, it wins in the all black department like i like & its one of the gold belts i dont hate bc it looks very cool + i like the long horns/ears i think its a cool sleek design (:
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not originally gonna put wk on here bc its wk but once again i love the cape collar very much also i forgot he wears fucking thigh highs so i have to forget everything else and say its batman in thigh high boots it kind of wins over everything just for that, belt is too chunky for my taste at times but i really like the glove details shown on the hand in the last image (prefer longer gloves overall though, dont like how blank the arms are) and i like the spikes on the heels and sorry hes in thigh high boots
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slapping him here bc i like how sleek it is just genuinely very nice, i like the blue interior i like the shorts i like the simplicity, also im a sucker for when hes not wearing heavy/visible armor like a freak sorry i think its fun i like when he can be more agile and stuff bc he does move more agile & less brutish violent in dcau stuff like this i like the long ears a lot i just genuinely love how simple and sleek and cool it is
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extra long halloween (film) one which is basically the same as above but his cape is stupid long and i just am in love how the shading & highlights on the cowl/cape in the film esp when its all black and not hit by the light like in this one sorry im at photo limit um this is mostly to say its the same as prev i just like the long ass cape i need it in fact
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sugako ¡ 4 years ago
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Can i request doing the clothes swap trend with Kenma Bokuto Ushijima Oikawa and Kageyama(idk your character limit. It wasnt in your rules) i hope this isnt too much for you. Have a good day
i lowkey did not know what this trend even was 😳 but this is cute (also i don’t really have a chara limit currently within reason)
sum: clothing swap trend w/ gn!reader x kenma, bokuto, ushi, oikawa, and kags
cw: clothing switches (no sizing indicators really), mostly fluff, kinda slightly suggestive content (for bokuto), timeskip spoilers!
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kenma
does not get it or why you would want to
you already wear his hoodies/sweatpants all the time so that’s the same thing he thinks
but he does it anyone because it’s going to make you happy
you get into it teasing him abt habits he has while he streams/in meetings
he doesn’t act super different but still imitates you a little
secretly loves having your soft sweater on because it smells like you
“you’re wearing my clothes right now.” he says bluntly, motioning to the old, too loose hoodie and fresh pair of boxers of his you have on.
“you know what i mean. i know you watch tiktoks even you pretend you don’t. you gotta wear my clothes.” you say, already reaching behind you to grab the set you pulled out for him.
for just another moment longer he hesitates before he finally snatches them from your hand. you close your eyes, waiting for him to change, and when he’s done he taps your shoulder.
“c’mon, my followers will like it.” he sighs.
bokuto
he suggests it as soon as he sees one video of people doing it
drags you away from whatever you’re doing to ask
already loves seeing you in his jerseys and t-shirts
idc if you have big tiddies so does he and his shirts would fit anyone
he would love to squeeze into your shorts or skirts with his massive ass and thighs
you just hope he doesn’t pull any seams, but even if he does it’s just funny and cute
“hey, baby...?” he draws out the word, pulling you away from your laptop screen. you shut it, already sensing that he wants to do something.
“what’s up?” you ask, pulling him into your arms, running your fingers through his hair.
“wanna do the couples outfit swap thing with me?”
“of course!” as you agree, he’s dragging you to your shared bedroom when he tosses his clean MSBY uniform at you, helping to drag the clothes you’re wearing off.
he shimmies on your clothes and sets his phone up to record. you hold back a wheeze as he awkwardly steps in front of the screen as the music starts up, gently mocking some of your habits. nearly in tears, you step out when it’s your turn holding onto a volleyball and trying to imitate his chest receive, but laughing so hard it barely bounces across the room to him.
“hey!” he comes stumbling back into view of the camera, laughing as he picks up the ball.
“you do that a lot, you’re very good at it with these.” you say, cupping his chest. on reflex, he tightens his muscles under your hold, firming up the soft flesh. the music fades off and the phone finishes recording.
“they’re good for a lot more than that,” he purrs, leaning in as though to kiss you, but bouncing the ball between your chests at the last second.
ushijima
another one that just doesn’t get it
doesn’t have tiktok so he doesn’t know what you mean at first
agrees immediately because you seem excited
he’s worried about fitting in your clothes though no matter your size
doesn’t know what to do so he just stands there (askjlsfj i’m sorry i just think he would)
“so, this is all.” he asks, looking down at himself before his eyes refocus on you.
“yep.” you answer plainly, buttoning the last button of his crisp, white dress shirt he pulled for you. while he didn’t totally get it, the way your eyes lit up when he was in your clothes and you in his made his heart warm and he couldn’t say no.
“i don’t do anything or...?”
“you can act like me if you want. promise i won’t be offended.” you joke, clicking the phone on and nodding at him. he’s a little stiff, but he does his best.
when it’s your turn, you hop up to him with your arms stretched over your head, spiking a mini foam volleyball that was sitting on your bedside table with a straight expression.
with his phone you snatched minutes ago you pretend to scroll through it with an oddly intense look that he gets when he concentrates. to anyone else, he might look angry, but you know he’s just focusing.
“do i really look that mad all the time?” his eyebrow just barely quirks up, and you can hear the tiniest hint of amusement in his voice.
“aww, you’re just a big, kind of sometimes serious guy with the prettiest eyes i’ve ever seen.” you cup his face in your hands, bringing it close so you can peck the tip of his nose. “but, uhh yes, a little bit.”
oikawa
another one that suggests it to you
has you in a plain shirt and athletic shorts in seconds
peruses all of your clothes to find the ones he thinks will suit him best
finally finds something that’s his favorite shade of blue and gets it on
he gets very much into it, overexaggerating your mannerisms, etc.
“i do not do that!” you call, holding back a crooked smile. finally, you push him out from in front of the phone.
before he can stop you, you start making flirty faces at the camera, pretending to take selfies with your tongue stuck out and eyebrows furrowed.
“excuse me?” he chuckles, coming back into frame. “i don’t do that.”
“oh, should i be poutykawa then?” you counter, crossing your arms and sticking out your bottom lip with a sullen look on your face. “i miss my bestie in japan and shoyo so much, but at least i’ll see them when i crush them at the olympics.” you taunt, throwing your head back.
“hey,” he whines, “did iwa tell you to call me those awful names? you know i just want you to call me tooru.”
you giggle as he lets out a long, dramatic sigh.
“i’m y/n and i’m so in love with tooru oikawa, san juan setter and his pretty hair and hands even though i pretend i’m all tough.” he throws back at you, grabbing your wrists and playfully started to wrestle with you. at onces, you’re glad he proposed this silly idea even as you’re about to be strong-armed onto the ground.
kageyama
another clueless king like ushi
but also does it because you seem excited
...and he likes seeing you in his clothes
if you give him something complicated (like that laces up, skirt, dress, etc.) he needs your help
looks very good in whatever clothes you put him in
even if you’re the same height/barely shorter than him, he’s gonna make fun of you for being short
you gotta hold back your laughing tears even before you start up
you let him go first, and he stiffly mocks some things you do, in step with the music. when you have to go, you’re already on the edge of losing it, you think you’re joke is too good.
first, you take a deep breath, and use your hands to part you hair, just like you’ve seen hinata do during his kageyama impressions. you barely get out the words “...power curry...” before you feel him roll his eyes and you let out a shuddering laugh.
“is that supposed to be me?” he asks as you pretend to quickly stuff you mouth with nothing.
“what?” you chuckle, “there’s nothing wrong with being a big eater, you’re a big guy.” you say, voice raising up a couple octaves.
“uh-huh, and the power curry commercial?” he questions.
“was a, uh, very important thing that you did and now some people know you from it.” you coughed out, acutely aware of the sinister smirk growing on his features.
suddenly, he drops down to both his knees. “hmm, is this how you see things?” he says flatly, looking around the room.
“tobio, i’m not even-”
“nuh-uh, i think this is a much better impression than i did earlier.” he stops you, still looking around. “i could see below a volleyball net from here, that’s pretty amazing.”
“yeah, well you’re a big, tall...big guy.” you weakly try to counter. his flat face drops for a just a second as a smile breaks through and he nods.
“i’m actually 188cm so i think you need to get on a chair or two.”
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laraplisetski ¡ 4 years ago
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Dating Iwaizumi Hajime
A/n: This isnt related to the headcanons but I have this request for Seijoh’s libero and since I'm doing dating hcs for all of Seijoh by their jersey numbers. So anyways please wait a little bit longer as I might tag you in the dating hcs for Watari. Sorry for any mistakes tho.
Special announcement! 
I just reached a hundred follows today! Thankyou for for following me and I'm so thankful for all the support. If I could, I would try to show more gratitude in any way.
Words: 1790
Tags: @imthatchishiyasimp​, @kekozume​
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(These arms tho)
Iwaizumi routinely calls you something like baka or dumbass but he says it in good faith.
For example whenever you do something stupid Iwaizumi call you a dumbass.
But he doesn't mean it, it's just how he shows his worry.
He's just a big ass tsundere, you cannot tell me otherwise. 
A lot of people think Iwaizumi would be a gentleman but like I feel like he would treat you like Oikawa but like way less harsher. 
Like he would let you call him nicknames like ‘iWa-ChAn’ and just blush and call you dumbass.
*cough cough* tsundere *cough cough* 
Also he's bad at giving compliments,
Like you'll be wearing nice clothes that really fit your form and he’ll really like you wearing them.
And you'll ask him if he likes your clothes, and hell just blush furiously grab your hand and just start walking.
‘Iwa, do you like what I wore today? It's my favorite outfit.’
‘Ye-yeah, we have to go, we'll miss our bus.’
One time you guys had a huge argument over this.
You feel insecure because he treated you more like Oikawa who was his best friend than his s/o.
He tried really hard after that to compliment you whenever you looked good.
(In his opinion you always did)
And you really appreciated him trying.
After that your bond grew stronger as both of you knew that you would be willing to for the other.
As your bond grew stronger the more you started to open up to him about your struggles. 
Now Hajime isn't a very open person. (Well he is but he doesn't like to admit it.)
And he's a little brash and very straightforward with his feelings or his thoughts. 
So when you're acting down he straight up asks you what's wrong and doesn't consider that you don't/wouldn't want to talk about it.
This might make you a little more agitated since you're already very sad but when he realizes that you don't want to talk about it, he immediately regrets it and apologies straight away.
One thing I love about Iwaizumi as a character is that he isn't afraid to tell the truth even if he knows he's in the wrong. 
But these things only happened in the start of your relationship because when you two spend much more time together he starts to notice patterns in your behavior and how you act based on how you feel. 
That really helps him to know if you're sad, angry or irritated at someone. 
Later in the relationship, he knows when to comfort you, when to give you space and when to scold you. 
You really appreciate this because he doesn't sugarcoat his words and he gives you advice that is honest and comes from his heart.
Moving on, let's talk about his friends.
By friends I mean Oikawa. 
When Iwaizumi first got a s/o Oikawa was fuming because 
‘wHo wOuLd DaRe taKe mY iWa-cHaN aWay frOm mE’
Iwa slapped him on the back of his head after he said that. 
After that every time you would come to school, Oikawa would stick to Iwaizumi like a leech
(for comedic purposes of course)
Iwaizumi found it amusing at first how jealous you would be that Oikawa was getting all your boyfriends attention. 
But then as time passed you started waving to Oikawa whenever he was sticking with Iwa and he started waving back. 
After that you two developed a friendship.
You know what this means.
Hell for Iwaizumi has started. 
So Iwaizumi would always walk you to class in the morning and you guys would sit with Oikawa for lunch.
Now that you're friends with Oikawa.
Ohoho, I'm sorry Iwa you have to suffer. 
So you guys get along very well and Iwaizumi is very thankful for that because the two most important people (other than his family) are getting along.
It's fine for the first two weeks but then you and Oikawa develop this sibling-like bond.
It's almost identical to Iwa and Oikawa’s bond but because you share the same sense of humor Oikawa doesn't get teased.
Also one time Oikawa convinced you to call Hajime, Iwa-Chan for a day.
To say Iwaizumi was not pleased was an understatement. 
The good thing is Oikawa got the bad end of it but it was worth it.
Also you guys eat lunch together and you and Oikawa keep making bad jokes and Iwaizumi has no choice but to sigh and deal with it, cause he loves both of you.
Poor iWa-ChAn.
You also tend to stick up for Oikawa during practices when the team is teasing him. 
Due to you thinking of him as your little brother (It doesn't matter if you're older or younger Oikawa gives off major annoying little brother vibes.)
And the team cant rebel against you cause if they did Iwaizumi would murder them.
Other than that they absolutely love you cause you take care of the first and second years and keep them in line.
And you get along with Matsun and Makki and share memes with them.
Surprisingly Kyotani also respects you.
And he actually listens to your advice.
(Because of this Oikawa will whine about how no one respects him and goes on a rant and then you have to cheer him up while simultaneously giving everyone attention in the team.)
Being a team mom for Seijoh is very hard.
Also I feel like the reason Kyotani respected you when you became Iwa’s s/o was because you were Iwa’s s/o.
But now his view on you has changed.
He's very inspired by you and looks up to you.
He's always amazed by how you can be such a naturally caring person and be such a good leader and team player. 
He also might come to you for advice if he had an argument with someone.
If you're a volleyball player as well and you're good, be ready for Kyotani following you around everywhere asking questions.
It's sort of endearing.
You and Iwa and Kyotani have this parent-son relationship and it's so wholesome I swear.
(Please adopt him.)
You do not only help keep the team in check you help them with matches too. 
Like maybe getting their opponents videos for Oikawa. 
You also sit down with the first and second years to watch their opponents videos and point out what seems peculiar and what not. 
One time the person who usually took videos of the matches was unavailable so you went out of your way to do it yourself. 
When Iwa found out he hugged you really tight and had this proud look in his eyes.
I bet when Oikawa found out he just clung to you and started full on crying.
(You're basically their manager at this point.)
Also when the team found out that you taped it yourself and all that, their respect from you went out the roof.
Now you are a goddess among them.
(Kyotani literally be looking at you with star eyes)
Enough about the team tho
Let's get back to Iwa and you.
You always try to be sneaky and steal his clothes but he catches you midway trying to sneak one of his jumpers out.
But he lets you have them anyways cause you look fucking cute in them.
Whenever he sees you wearing his clothes this man just blushes like 50 shades of red.
(I'm sorry pun wasn’t intended)
But anyways what I'm trying to say is that he blushes a deep red and basically just becomes a stuttering mess.
You like kiss him on the cheek like this once and he's putty in your hands. 
I'm not even kidding.
Also Iwa’s pretty muscular so no matter how long you are his hoodies will always be loose on you in some way.
(sorry muscular people)
And Iwa finds it so cute like
His s/o in his hoodie that's all loose on them.
Just like internally crying at that point.
Also mind you Iwaizumi loves back hugs like. 
Imagine you are wearing one of his articles of clothing and you just casually back hug him.
Man will short circuit but will never admit he likes them because hes a 
Tsundere~~
But this might just be my love of back hugs talking who knows.
When he doesn't have practice he usually stays at home and cuddles with you or you have movie nights with Tooru but that is rare cause he has to take care of his cousin.
But you guys just calmly cuddle and no one is really speaking.
Just basking in each other's presence and being comfortable in each other's company. 
Sometimes one of you falls asleep and the other just strokes their fingers through their hair.
It's basically the same when he comes back from practice but the only difference is that he takes off his shirt and you massage his strong muscles with some oil. 
After that y'all cuddle but you're blushing the entire time because like Iwaizumi’s shirtless excuse me!
‘And this bitch just goes,
‘Take a picture it'll last longer’ 
Like what, how do you expect yourself not to short circuit.
And curse you Oikawa, you don't have to teach him the ways of flirting.
Usually you wouldn't react to that type of comment but he's shirtless and now you're putty in his hands. 
So you both are like beans. 
Also I'm like a hundred percent sure Iwaizumi is a big spoon. 
He just loves caging you in his arms and making sure you feel protected. 
It also keeps him very grounded and just honestly happy to have you there with him.
There was this one incident in which you and Oikawa were bantering and Iwaizumi wasn't having any of it so he picked you up and threw you on his shoulder. And walked away like nothing happened. 
After that you guys sort of had an impromptu make out session in the club room, which was unfortunately interrupted by Kindaichi barging in.
Bless him.
And his eyes.
You and Iwaizumi had to sit him down and make him swear to not tell anyone. 
After that you two continued but Kindaichi might've accidentally spilled to Kunimi 
Opps.
Bonus points
Iwaizumi likes to buy purple hyacinths for you on valentines day because it's your favorite flower and to also say sorry for when he was not boyfriend like in the beginning of your relationship. 
(Yes I referenced Purple Hyacinth the webtoon, go watch it)
Also the team has a custom made Seijoh jacket, just for you!
And the first time you saw it you just hugged Iwaizumi and started sobbing because these boys were too precious and just too pure. (I love Seijoh)
The end.
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petewentzisblack1312 ¡ 4 years ago
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okay so since you know more than sarah could u give more info?? because i love learning about pete and his blackness as its literally never talked about ANYWHERE else. like thank god for tumblr tbh. sarah is genuinely the only reason ive ever known anything about him in that way but its always been limited so thats why i sent her the ask. i didnt even know ur blog. sorry for sending to her instead of you!!!
oh its fine!! im pretty new on the scene technically. while sarah and i were in the fob fandom at the same time in 2015 ish, i actually left tumblr completely and recently came back!! but anyway, lets talk about petes melanin (my beloved <3)
theres a pretty pervasive narrative, not just around pete but around any black and especially biracial celebrities that theyre ashamed of their blackness or arent "really" black. theres like. a looooooooooong conversation to be had within the black community about this, but to tldr it, the assumption is if you dont look black, you arent black, which for a lot of reasons isnt exactly the case. with him in particular theres a lot of stuff that contributes to this.
most people do not associate the alternative scene and emo especially with black people, so its easy to overlook a lot if someone isnt SUPER obviously black. pete has other ethnic features, like his nose, and is recognizable visually as black except for his skin color. except thats because hes been artificially lightened in photoshoots due to editing and (ALLEGEDLY AND POSSIBLY) lighter foundations. further, he relaxed his hair, which takes away another ethnic feature of his.
there is another aspect to this, which is that black people tan, noticeably and by several shades. you will not notice it if youre like seeing them continuously throughout the year, but as someone who lives in the caribbean and has spent some time in the states, the difference is stark enough to be noticeable. a lightskinned black person may look MUCH paler in the winter compared to in the summer.
in addition, the wealthier you are, the less time you tend to spend in the sun, so ive noticed that black celebrities tend to get lighter as they gain notoriety just because they have like more resources. the reason people from the caribbean tend to become lighter when we go to the states isnt because of less sun, during the summer thats not at all the case, its because the US is more developed so you dont HAVE to spend as much time in the sun.
besides that, hes like genuinely very loud and proud about being black, but all of those attempts are met with backlash. there was the reaction to his natural hair, the reaction to him with cornrows, and the reaction to his very emotional rant about the murder of george floyd. it happens in fobs music too!! ioh for example draws a lot of influence from choral and hymnal arrangements and soul music, not to mention jay-z and babyface working on the album itself, which led to them being labelled sell outs. they also just generally work with rappers more, with lil wayne on tiffany blews and big sean on srar, both of which also led to them being called sell outs. ab/ap as an album draws influence from rap/trap and mixtape culture in the way it was written (thats why its got so many samples), and subsequently got remixed. remember what happened next? mania draws a lot of influence from calypso and dancehall music and features burna boy singing in yoruba patois. that one led to the featured artist getting harassed en masse and multiple (worse) edits of the song without him on it. i dont like it here 💞.
that last point brings me to the fact that while pete definitely loves hardcore and metal, he also has always loved reggae and dancehall. hes half jamaican, spent time in jamaica as a child and listened to his grandparents records, which were. well. reggae and calypso and a little dancehall. if anyone ASKS him about it, hell talk about it willingly and candidly, theres an entire interview from during the hiatus (which i can no longer find rip) where hes asked about and talks about going natural and spending time in jamaica and listening to reggae, which heavily influenced black cards. he visited jamaica during the hiatus! although its unclear if he visited family since literally every news outlet that mentioned it was like "oh tropical getaway <3" unaware that thats where his folks are from
also heres that interview snippet sarah mentioned! i have the full page, its about the early days which is funny bc its just before futct.
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theres also some poetry on sarahs blog that she found years ago thats VERY black. i dont like making it easy to find for nonblack people simply because the first time it was unearthed mostly white people were talking about it and the meaning of it went way over everyone elses head so i try to make sure that if people start talking about it they know going in that its about being black and biracial specifically and so that black fans dont feel the way i did when it first surfaced lol
all of this emphatically points to pete genuinely loving his blackness and not trying to hide it and it being something that majorly shaped his life, but genuinely being unable to talk about it bc of public perception.
sorry for talking your ear off!! if you have any specific qs i almost certainly have answers!!
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foronceleavemealone ¡ 4 years ago
Text
Long time no see
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 
A/N: First time writing. Really wanted to write, but I think this is very bad. I don’t know how repetetive this is, but to me it seems very repetitive. Please be kind, but also I’m open for roasting. This isn’t a reader insert, this is more of an OC, but not really either. I feel like it’s somewhere in the middle. The watch that I wrote about is inspired by this watch. Also I don’t know much about 90s fashion, especially work fashion/clothing, I just think those type of necklaces that I made her wear look very neat. 
Summary: She’s very done with work. On her way out she sees an old friend and they begin to catch up.
Pairing:  Javier Peùa x OC (I guess? But it can also be an insert. Seems somewhere in the middle for me. idk..)
Genre: angst(ish), fluff(ish)
------------------------------------
She layed in her bed on her left side staring into the distance of the room. Her heartbeat felt a lot more annoying than usual and even in a way painful. She looked at the clock. 4.37am. Not too bad?
‘If I fall asleep right now I'll be able to sleep for 3 hours and 23 minutes, which isnt that bad. I've had worse’. But she couldnt fall asleep. Various thoughts were plagueing her mind. After a couple more hours she couldnt take it anymore.
“For fucks sake” she mumbeled to herself and looked at the clock. 6.42. “good enough”  she got up and went to the bathroom. Getting ready took up quite some time. She did want to look professional one last time. White button up, with a couple upper buttons undone, black blazer, black pants, black heels, a lariat necklace and a watch completed her look. She never liked pencil skirts. Not that it was a statement of some sort, more so that it made her feel uncomfortable. The hip hugging sensation, the way it looked, it just wasnt her cup of tea. Also she couldnt get much field work done in them.
She looked at herself in the mirror.
‘Looks like I'm going to a funeral’ a thought ran through her mind. In a way this was a funeral. The funeral of her career.
She thought about having breakfast but was too afraid to ruin her clothes.
‘Why didn't I think about this’ is all she thought mentally cursing at herself for not planning the little things.
She grabbed an apple, took a few bites and realised that that was not going to work, the nerves were kicking in and food didn't seem like their right companion. She grabbed her keys, her bag and went to take the last trip to the HQ.
------------------------------------
“Are you absolutely sure you want to do this?” her boss asked.
“Absolutely. I don't have any doubts” she said with a smile forming on her lips, but she knew she wasn’t sure. 
“Well, it's difdicult to let such people like you go. It's tough losing good agents. But I wish you luck”
“Thank you. It was an honor working here and with you, sir” she said as she stood up.
“Likewise” her boss put out his hand and she reached out a shook it.
They nodded to each other and she walked out of his office.
It's not that she was a bad agent. Like her boss said, she was good, great, fine. But not great enough. She always felt underappreciated, but that wasn’t the reason why she decided to resign, or so she thought. It was everything else. Both physical and mental trauma. Getting shot left it's toll. She was never severely injured and thank goodness for that, but a couple of bullets pierced her arm once, one went to her lower abdomen and not to mention the times the tac vest saved her life, only leaving a pain in her chest rather than a gaping wound. All of these incidences made her think that maybe she was not only a lousy shot, but also a bit shortsighted, not quick enough, yet she never spoke about these worries and kept everything to herself. The physical scars were fine, they healed and stopped hurting, but the mental ones... She never forgot those moments when she got shot, or when she shot someone else. Losing coworkers left a mark. Losing partners, now that  left a huge mark... After working for what felt like centuries, she started thinking whether this is really making any difference. Is it actually doing any good? So many people dead, so much blood shed, so many lives ruined. Being morally gray? Yeah, seems about right.. 
Working overtime surely didn’t help the situation. She wasn’t a workaholic, at least that’s what she had told herself. Working overtime, obsessing over details and usually getting little to no progress at all led her right into burn out teritory. And one day, she had enough. She talked to her boss about quitting after she finishes off one last case. He tried to talk her out of it, somehow drag out the case, giving her more paperwork or by making her chase loose ends, hoping she would change her mind. She did her job, being the great agent she is (or was), and finished everything yesterday. As she handed the case report to her boss, a letter of resignation was attatched to it. Today she only came in to gather the rest of her stuff from her office and tie up any loose ends, and say goodbye to her coworkers. 
She didn’t have that many things in her office. She kept it simple, nothing too personal. She didn’t even need a box, she had cleared most of the framed honors yesterday. She looked through the rest of the office to see if she forgot anything. She checked the drawers of her desk and in one of them there was something she’d left yesterday, not knowing whether to leave it there, throw it out or take it with her. It was a watch. She hesitated.
“Oh what the hell” she said as she took it and put it in her pocket. 
Finally she was done. She didn’t even stop to look at the now empty office. She was quite done, she had been for a while. She started walking down the corridor. As she reached the first floor she glanced at her watch.
“11am, not too bad” she mumbled to herself. 
She looked up and a few meters right in front of her she saw a man. They locked eyes and something felt so familiar, so nice, so heartwarming. A smile formed on the man’s face.
“My my my, what a sight for sore eyes” she said with a huge smile which almost made her chuckle.
“Sad to hear your eyes are sore” he said and chuckled a little bit himself while going in for a hug. He smelled like he always had (she could never tell the exact composition, but it reminded her of cardamom and cedar) and she found it comforting in a way, especially on this day. 
“How have you been?” she asked pulling away from the hug.
“I’ve..” he hesitated for a bit while looking at her. “I just resigned. Had enough of this bullshit”
“Oh wow. How come? I heard you did a great jo-”
“I did what I had to do. Or at least what seemed right to do” he said as he looked at the floor. “Anyway, what about you, how have you been?” he asked trying to change the subject.
“Oh I... I actually quit today too” she said, with a little quiver in her voice.
The man looked at her and raised an eyebrow. This not only surprised him, but made him a little bit upset. He was never big on picking up emotions and feelings, but this just felt somehow a bit off.
“You? Quitting? That doesn’t seem like you”
“Well, I had enough of this bullshit too”. She forced a smile.
“So, are you done for today then?” 
“Yeah, pretty much so. I was just about to head out. Go...home.” she said with a sudden wave of sadness washing over.
“Wanna get a drink?” He thought that whatever she was going through could be washed away with a drink, at least for a moment.
“It’s like 11 am”
“Right... and I forgot you don’t drink”
“Yeah, I don’t drink. So how about some coffee?”
“Yeah, sure”
“Javier Peña, man of many words, like always” she smiled with some memories flooding her mind.
“Shut it” he said smiling, feeling surprisingly blissful at the sight of her smiling.
------------------------------------
“So why did you quit?” Javier asked bluntly.
“Straight to the point, huh” 
He tilted his head a bit and smiled.
“It just doesn’t seem like you. You always seemed to love the job, the rush it gave you”
“It did once. But it was getting too much. And I couldn’t take it after I lost my partner” she said with a shaky voice. She visibly got upset, but cleared her throat “sorry” she smiled.
“No, it’s ok. We don’t have to talk if you do-”
“No it’s fine. I should talk about it. It’s been months. And the longer I keep it to myself the worse it’ll be”
Just as she was about to begin talking the waiter came and brought their drinks.
“Thank you” she said to the waiter and flashed a smile. Javier always loved how she was kind like that.
“Black coffee? I thought you hated straight up black coffee” 
“Well, I thought I’d spice up my life with something I don’t usually get” she said and took a sip, regret forming on her face.
“How’s that spice?” Javier said trying not to laugh.
“It’ll... It’ll grow on me”. They both giggle. 
“I’ve heard that many times before. It’s been years and still no progress” he said still trying to control the slight chuckle.
“It’s really been years, hasn’t it?” she said and looked at him. They both stared into each other’s eyes for a bit, some form of nostalgia washing over both of them, until she reached out into her pocket and pulled something out. “Speaking of years, or well, time I guess. Here’s what I found”. She showed Javier that silver watch she took from her drawer before she left the office.
“No way.. is that? Is that my watch?” he said and reach out for it. She handed him the watch, their hands touching for a bit and she remembered that day.
------------------------------------
It was a hot summer day and the car surely wasn’t parked in a shade before they got in it.
“Oh fuck” Javier said as he sat behind the wheel. 
“You could actually cook something in here” she said and fanned herself with her hand. 
They sat in silence for a bit. Javier rubbed his face with his hands while she sat on the passenger side with the door wide open, rubbing her right temple. 
“Are you sure you’re ok?” Javier asked as he looked over to her.
“Yeah, I’m fine. He knocked the wind out of me, but everything seems fine”
“He would have thrown you out the window”
“He would have done a lot more, if it weren’t for your quick thinking. Thanks by the way”
“That’s the least I could do for a partner” Javier said as he looked her up and down.
They sat in the silence for a little bit.
“He tore off my watch, broke it” she said as she rubbed her left wrist, which most likely hurt since her facial expression shifted once she touched it. “It was my dad’s gift” she said with sadness in her voice.”I have a date tonight, and I don’t even know what time it is” she smiled a bit, thinking to herself that it was a bit absurd to think about such a thing after all that just happened. 
Javier looked at his watch.
“Well it’s currently 6:47pm. And as I remember you have that date at 8pm.” Javier looked at his watch for a bit too long and unclasped it. “Here, take it” he said holding out his watch.
“What? Javi, I don’t need a watch that desperately, I’ll manage” 
“Just take it for tonight, I know you don’t wanna be late, you like that guy. And we always get too focused on paper work to pay attention to the lobby clock” 
She looked at his hand with his watch in it and thought for a moment before reaching out and touching Javier’s hand.
-------
“Some last day of trainee work that was” Javier said placing the watch on the table and bringing her back to present day. It seemed like he was reliving that same moment. “And you’ve kept the watch for so long” 
“I forgot to return it the next day. And then we were transfered to different locations. I couldn’t just throw it out. I always wanted to return it.” 
“It stayed with you for that long you should keep it” Javier said and took a sip of his coffee. 
“Well it did get me through that date”
“Some date that was. You married the guy” he said with some heartache and bitterness, regretting his words seconds after as he cursed at himself, he should’ve thought more before speaking, he didn’t want to upset her. 
“Some marriage that was. We ultimately got divorced” she took a sip of her coffee to wash away those rancid words with the bitter liquid, but decided that she hated it.
“Sorry for bringing it up” Javier said and looked at his own coffee cup. He felt like he was hitting all of the wrong spots today. Like poking a wounded animal with a stick. He didn’t want to do that. He’s been fond of her from their academy days and the feeling always increased with their every meeting, especially when they moved up from being just trainees to special agents.They didn’t get to see each other as much, but they would run into each other from time to time, catch up. The last time they had a catching up session like this was after the Escobar case, right before Javi went to spend some time back at his hometown. 
“No, it’s fine.. It’s fine. So what are you going to do now that you’re free?” she emphasised the word free.
“I’m going back to Laredo. Gonna spend some time with my dad, help him out. He’s not getting any younger. What about you?”
“Oh, I don’t....know” she said as she twisted the cup of coffee in her hands.
Javier didn’t like this mood she was in. Quitting her job, not having a plan on what to do next. She was always one step ahead, organised. He knew that something was wrong and it broke his heart. She was probably hurting, as he guessed. 
“Why don’t you come to Laredo with me for a while?” this time he said it after some thought, but still it felt like a wild card to him.
She looked up at him, with surprise on her face. 
“Javi I-”
“I’m sure some fresh air and good company would do you go. We have plenty of room at home, you’d be welcome. And you don’t have any plans so” he clears his throat “I think..I’d be a good..idea”
“But, Javi, I wouldn’t want t-”
“You won’t be bothering anyone”
“What about your dad? I wouldn’t want to impose”
“Trust me, he likes company. So what do you say?”
“I mean it’s a big deal”
“It’s really not. Just for a couple of weeks”
“Ok, fine” she said as she took the watch that was still laying on the table and put it in her pocket.
“Great” Javier said as he took a sip of his coffee. He finally felt some relief in his heart. 
------------------------------------
When she got back home it was already 5pm. Where did the time go? They spent their time talking about their academy days, and their trainee days, also talking a bit about the trip. 
“What did I get myself into” she said as she poured herself a glass of water. 
She brushed a hand over the side of her blazer and was reminded of the watch that was still in her pocket. She took it out and looked at it, caressing it with her thumb as a smile grew on her face. And to think she wanted to throw it away. Gosh, what a foolish move would that have been. She never realises just how much she had missed him until they meet again and this time was to exception.
“Yeah... Some date that was” she said as she sat at the kitchen table still looking at the watch, contemplating the events of today. She stopped her thoughts and realised what she actually had agreed to do - travel to Laredo with Javi- and laughed to herself. 
“Well... maybe it’ll be fun” she said to herself, as she took a nother sip of water, with somewhat forced positivity, but excitement too.
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Hey, it's me again! The Anon that constantly comes back because I'm too lazy to play the new lessons myself.
Anyway, Lesson 30-something, what happened in it? I've just seen screenshots and most of them are Solomon blushing (which, well, can't really say I'm complaining).
Hope you answer, and I'll probably ask you about the lessons after this.
-Anon that's still somehow stuck on Lesson 31. Seriously, I should really start playing the game again soon.
I'm screaming I literally wrote this whole thing and it got deleted because tumblr refused to send it and just banished the reply into the void i want to fight someone. I'm so sorry I'm gonna bang my head against something now.
It's okay if you ask cause I need someone to rant to after lessons!
So two days before the ritual to break the pacts. Solomon is researching how to use the night dagger.
Lucifer & Satan are arguing on the staircase (cause 50% of all important conversations happen on staircases - and I mean this sincerely). Lucifer promised mammon he'd come play cards with him and Satan doesn't want him to go cause he thinks it'll be a scam (he's worried about his dad big brother❤). MC asks Satan if he's worried about Lucifer and that makes his affection go up. He asks MC to promise him to go with Lucifer and keep an eye on him. He ruffles MC's hair and gives them the same we'll still be friends talk that the others do
They go to play cards and place bets, if Mammon wins he gets Lucifer's credit card for a day and if Lucifer wins he gets mc alone for a day. You can choose whether you want mc to either play along or cheer for Lucifer. (And look my MC's performing Olympic grade gymnastics to avoid Lucifer's advances & this lesson has a lot of options to romance Lucifer that I didn't pick so...)
Lucifer gets distracted by Mammon's car before they start playing.
WE GET THE BACKSTORY ABOUT THE CAR!!!!!! AND LOOK IT'S BEING THERE FOR SO LONG WITHOUT BEING ACKNOWLEDGED THAT I WAS ALMOST CERTAIN IVE BEEN HALLUCINATING IT. the backstory was actually really cute.
Mammon really really wanted this limited edition car (it had a rare colour) so he worked his ass off and earned money to buy it (I think it's mentioned that this is the first thing he bought from his own money). But by the time he'd earned enough it had been sold out. As far as Mammon knows Lucifer spoke to the dealer and was able to find one last car (can you do that? Can you just ask them to look in the back and they'll just pop out with a car they accidentally overlooked?). BUT Lucifer recalls that he actually spoke to diavolo and called in a special favour to get the car for mammon. Lucifer tells mammon he was impressed by him and I no longer possess a physical form I'm now a bowl of goop with thumbs to type
Lucifer wins (duh) and mammon asks to speak to mc alone. He tells them that even if their pact is severed he'll always be their first man. MC says 'I won't forget.' Mammon does that stuttery thing and says something like 'don't forget.' He hugs them tight. I added a screenshot of this (& other important moments) to my first answer but I don't wanna risk it cause if I lose this again I will realistically commit homicide. But anyway this line killed me 'suddenly I feel like the invisible bond between us is even stronger than it was before'. If I wasn't a puddle before I would be now
The next day mc & Lucifer meet up to go out, Asmo and mammon complain, I'm a total dick so I don't let MC hold Lucifer's hand and it makes him sad (I cry). They meet Solomon at the gate and he says he needs to talk with MC but can wait till after. He suggests going to the carnival (from the beginning of the season) cause it's the last day at the devildom and Simeon was planning on taking Luke but had to bail to go to the celestial realm. (Also the devildom is only one city/district right? I always saw it as the capital of The Devildom as a whole)
Lucifer laments not being able to remeber their first time at the carnival, mc gets to reassure him that it's okay. They get popcorn and go on the ferris wheel.
He asks them what they spoke about last time on the ferris wheel. The answers are 'Lucifer' or 'diavolo' . if you choose diavolo he throws shade at past Lucifer for being an idiot and talking about another man when with MC (*SNORT*) .
LUCIFER CONFESSES!!!? HE SAYS "MC I LOVE YOU"?!? HE'S THE FIRST BROTHER TO DIRECTLY CONFESS AND HAVE MC DIRECTLY CONFESS BACK.HE BASICALLY SAYS 'ANYWAY PAST LUCIFER WAS A FUCKING IDIOT BUT I LOVE YOU'. my mc goes 'lol as a friend'
Yes yes ik mammon technically confessed first and did so twice (thrice?) but neither were direct. The first was him agreeing with mc about them being in love in front of someone else and the second was under the influence of the truth bracelet. Asmo confessed too but in a 'never thought I'd find someone I love more than me. That's wild' way.
After mc shoots him down he goes 'that sucks guess I'll have to try harder to make you fall for me'
@like-nxrthernstxrs if you say you love him back, you get to kiss and mammon who followed you sees and goes quiet which yeah no, no thanks
I didn't unlock the locked lessons but screenshots show that all the brothers follow them I think (imagine the nightmare of dating one of them for real tho? Like you, me and your friend Steve except Steve is your 6 brothers who want to sleep with me)
The most notable exchange during them is when Levi asks whether Lucifer seems happier without his memories (he actually is more carefree) but mammon says he wouldn't be happier because he loves all his little brothers and he wouldn't be happy if he couldnt remember them. Levi tells mammon it's gross whenever he starts acting like an actual older brother (so we've seen mammon step up to the role of a older brother every once in a while - specially when Lucifer isnt able to - and he's actually really good at it? And that's just💞💞)
When they go home, solomon's in MC's room. He goes 'so do you want the good news or bad news first? Actually they're both bad news and you're fucked lol'
The dagger is so old that it doesn't have enough power to break the bonds and even when charged with Solomon's power it isn't enough.
The only way to restore the power is to use it to stab a powerful demon in the chest and have it absorb the demon's power.
Then he gives mc the dagger and is like 'anyway go stab Lucifer in the chest or we're all gonna die'
MC's like 'what the fuck'
Solomon goes 'lol just kidding i wouldn't ask you to do that'
Solomon tells them that he spent his whole life protecting humanity and that he is willing to do anything to save it. He tells them that choosing between all of the three realms and one demon should be easy. But he can't because he knows that'll make MC sad and he doesn't want to hurt them (honestly some of the dialogue from Solomon, Simeon and even diavolo makes me wonder if they'll ever become LIs down the road)
Lucifer has been eavesdropping the whole time (obviously) and kicks Solomon out.
Mc tells time not to worry and that they'll figure something else out. He tells them that he cares about his brothers and them (he puts a bit of emphasis on MC) and that he wants them to stab him. MC keeps on protesting. He grabs their hand and makes them point the dagger to his chest. You get a choice. You can either stab Lucifer, MC or command him to 'stay'. If you choose to command him, he freezes for a sec and then tells MC they are too distraught to be able to put any actual power behind the command. He moves their hand to stab himself. The screen goes white. If you decide to stab MC he screams their name. The screen goes white
A '???' voice tells them to stop and that it's not needed. Simeon (the only person with even a single braincell in this entire game) stops their hand and tells them they've been brave. He slips an old ring on to their finger. The screen goes white.
The screen's still white but now it's white in a way that makes it look like it's sunlight blinding the screen.
Another '???' voice apologises to MC for not being able to meet them before. It asks mc why they refused to stab Lucifer. They can say it's because they love him, because they didn't want anyone to get hurt or because they wanted to find another way. And look even if you aren't romancing Lucifer you have to admit at this point of the game MC does love him and all his brothers as well.If you pick the first option the voice says that it's a good thing and that they should cherish that love and let it grow. If you choose the second it tells them they are kind. The voice then tells them that after seeing how much the brothers adore them it expected them to be wicked and that it's happy they aren't. It tells them that they don't have to worry and that the ring of light will keep their powers in check and that they should go back because the others are worried. MC wakes up to Lucifer calling their name.
I'm 90% certain the voice in Michael, 10% of me is terrified it'll turn out to be God. And look I'm not religious, I don't really believe in anything and either way I was raised in a Buddhist household so God has never been anything I believed in BUT God talking to me through an otome game is definitely not something I need rn or ever really
Mc, Solomon, Simeon and Luke are by the lake at the palace. Solomon says he can finally relate to Mammon cause Lucifer had punished him. Simeon reveals that Lucifer had punished diavolo as well and would be coming after the rest of them that kept this whole thing secret from him (And this kills me! This man loves his family so much he was not only willing to go against God and his army when his family was in danger but he was also willing to lash out at DIAVOLO who he has so much respect & loyalty towards when he accidentally put Lucifer's family in danger!??? Anyway any chance I had of solidifying into a physical state has been completely swept away)
It's revealed that Simeon may or may not have stolen the ring from Michael who still loves Lucifer and keeps a shrine to Lucifer all of Lucifer's things from the celestial realm with him. And honestly I want whatever superpower Lucifer has that allows him to act like a dick with major issues but still makes ppl just absolutely love him. (I absolutely adore how easily om! throws around the word 'love' or actions of love. And I don't mean regarding MC. I mean between the brothers, undateables, Luke and side characters. Like at this point there's no doubt that despite all their differences everyone loves each other.)
Simeon (or Luke) note that now with the ring MC is as powerful a sorcerer as Solomon and may someday surpass him. Solomon is asked of he's jealous and he says he's not and he's glad to finally have someone like him.
Solomon pulls MC aside and asks them for a favour. They can either ask what it is or say 'anything for you'. If you choose the second option he blushes. He tells them he has spent his whole life looking out for humanity (thousands of years) and that he would like to work side by side with them to protect the humans. In his own words they'd be 'partners'. You can either agree or tell him it sounds like a pain in the ass. If you agree he says that a part of him knew they'd agree. (I can't remember if this is said outloud or implied but I'm assuming this means Solomon will teach them to use actual magic thus making 3 out of 4 of my main game MCs magical apprentices. Nice.)
*Solomon refers to himself as 'the witty sorcerer' confirming that all their aliases in the cards have actual canon meaning...so Mammon's 'fallen warrior' and 'punishment party' is basically just confirming he was probably the only one classed as a fighter from all his brothers back in the celestial realm and that he's a masochist right? That's what that means?*
Barbatos arrives to welcome them and ask them to follow him.
The lesson ends.
The pre stabbing scene with Solomon and mc doesn't really follow the exact dialogue of the first scene in S2 and the backgrounds don't match either (the human world vs MC's bedroom). Now this could mean the devs fucked up or it could mean there's more BS waiting to be stirred up. Personally I believe it's the first one BUT with how determined the devs seem with turning all of Lucifer's hair white i wouldn't be surprised if it was the second either
Hope that helps 31!❤ sorry it took some time I had to take constant breaks to scream cause the app sucks :)))
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jaeyleo ¡ 4 years ago
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Mermaid au??! 👀!!!
sorry this took SO long to answer! but anyway!! mermaid au!!
also, the timeline is set way in the past so they don’t have a lot of the technology we have. i have to do more research before i find the year but ANYWAY.
so in my au, henrik is the only human. he lives in a little village on a super small island, and he is the island physician and a fisherman (but he usually only fishes for himself and his son). his hair is a little longer, down to his shoulders, but he Always has it either tied up or dutch braided. he really likes to play the lute and he is learning how to speak mer from chase! (mer is mostly clicking and breaths and long notes like singing so it’s a little difficult but hes gettin there.) henrik likes to paint and is very fond of board games.
chase, who is named romeo in this, is a blue mermaid, his whole body is a monochrome of different shades of blue. he lives up closer to the island, and really enjoys talking with henrik and the other islanders. hes a little scrawny, much younger about 19 or 20. hes learning english, and is super close friends with henrik! he likes to steal henrik’s fish and release them back into the ocean >:3 hes also a vegetarian! romeo’s tail isnt super flowy as his fin is similar to what a clown fish tail would look like. he also has a fin on the right and left side of his tail, and the left one is smaller and a little deformed! hes very bubbly and fun loving and he collects anything and everything shiney!!
jameson is a deep sea mermaid, who is about 800 years old. hes a siren King, and is SUPER big his tail is like 60 feet long not including the rest of his body. he has extra webs under his arms that attach to his ribs, extra fins on his tail, and his fingers are longer and a bit stronger in the webs. he is a dark grey and cream mermaid, and he never ever speaks or even whispers because his voice is so unbelievably strong it could kill the mermaids in the water in his kingdom. his tail is super flowy and Veryyyy strong, and his scales tend to glow and gleam like moon beads at night! hes a bit of a serious King, but he has a soft spot for his son, Prince Jonathan.
jonathan is a siren Prince to jameson. hes also a deep sea mermaid but because hes still so young he hasn’t yet grown into his full length. hes a little smaller than chase. john is almost completely deaf, so his songs, much like his father, have gone into the instruments he plays and the signs he has. johnny is a mischievous, cunning little mermaid who really enjoys stealing fish from nets and scratching up boats. he likes to hang out with other sirens but he’s never enjoyed the act of hurting people,,,,, just likes to lure them close so he can steal from them! johnny is a dark grey, cream, and red mermaid. his tail and webs are identical to jameson’s.
the twins, anti and marvin, are both sirens. they both have extremely flowing and long tails, both of which are always gleaming and glowing like opal gems and moonstone. though a lot of their scales are actually a matte black!
marvin (who named micah) is a completely blind siren, who often follows the voice of his twin when they swim together if they aren’t holding onto each other. micah is very kind and gentle, but hes also a prankster and likes to tease and mess with the humans he meets in harmless (but ANNOYING) ways with his brother. when he HAS to eat humans he always makes their deaths painless and sleepy and he tries to eat the mean ones >:((. micah really likes burying himself in the sand and sun bathing, and his eyes look just pearls.
anti (who is named misha) is very playful and mysterious! he tends to mess with humans more than micah and enjoys making them swoon and drool over him with songs. misha also aims to eat the more Awful humans when he needs to, but he certainly isn’t as gentle as marvin is and likes the water to turn more red than it should. misha likes to collect starfish and is Always with his brother. they tend to hold onto eachother like otters do when they sleep so they don’t get swept away from each other in the water. anti also likes to bury himself in the sand, but he doesn’t like sun bathing as much.
so that’s mostly what i got for now, if u guys have any questions please feel free to send them!! i’ll be updating with more word building as i go along in the au :)
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spnsoap ¡ 4 years ago
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Hi! Little prompt for you : Wolfstar and the Hanahaki disease. Have a great day !
Hi, thank you so much for the ask! i so sorry this took me a lot longer to write then i was expecting, I hope you like it !!
tw: mentions of death, a little gore
Jame’s had just gotten to platform 9 ¾ , and said goodbye to his parent’s before hopping on the train dragging his trunk behind him. He walked down the aisle peering into each compartment looking for Sirius, he knew Sirius had to be here somewhere cause he was always the first on the train of his friends.  James was almost to the back of the train when he looked to his left, and saw a familiar head of black hair and a black leather jacket. 
“Hey Sirius!” James pulled open the compartment door and hauled his trunk in behind him. Sirius looked up from the window he was looking out of, and cracked a smile.
“Ah finally some decent company” James let out a hearty laugh as he sat down across from him.
“What were you looking at, pads?”  James questioned with a small smirk on his face. Sirius whipped his head around and turned a light shade of pink before answering,
“What? Nothing.” James' smile widened with amusement as he raised his eyebrows at his best friend, but he didn’t question any further. Just then the door slid open again to reveal Remus, 
“Hey guys. Am i walking in on something?” he questioned, also with an amused grin on his face as he looked between James and Sirius. Sirius turned a brighter shade of red at this and turned back the window, not responding.
“Oh no, not at all moony dear friend,” James started, “it’s just pads here, has a crush!” Sirius shot him a glare and muttered a “Shut up prongs” 
Remus had sat down next to James who was saying “come on, who is it?” But Sirius didn’t respond, so they dropped the subject sitting in a comfortable silence until Peter came in, and the mindless chatter started.
“No way!! There's no way Mcgonagall would fall for that!” James had been saying before the compartment door slid open and Lily stepped in , with her arms crossed.
“Fall for what?” she questioned with an eyebrow raised and giving them a piercing look. James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter had previously all been planning some of their pranks for throughout the year, before Lily entered. All previous conversation ceased as they looked up at her, and this time it was James whose face had turned a bright shade of pink.
“Oh nothing” James said cooley, while putting his elbow across the seat behind Remus' head so that his head was resting on his hand. This would’ve looked cool and nonchalant, if his elbow hadn't slipped causing him to fall forward onto Remus’ lap while also elbowing him in the back of the head. Lily simply rolled her eyes and was about to leave when one of her ravenclaw friends came up behind her to peer in at Remus. Remus quickly sat backup and fixed his hair once he saw the Ravenclaw boy looking in at them with a smile on his face.
“Hey Remus, you doin’ alright?” the Ravenclaw boy said with a flirty tone and twinkle in his eyes. Remus was very obviously flustered as he said “yeah, yeah great” now even brighter red than James was.
Sirius looked at the boy with anger and jealousy? But why was he jealous? He doesn't like the Ravenclaw boy, he doesn’t even know him. Sirius thought it must be because all the boys liked Remus, no one ever flirted with Sirius like that, yes that must be it. Sirius tore his eyes away from the sight, choosing instead to look aimlessly out the window.
“Dang Remus, who was the hottie?” Peter asked after the boy and Lily had left. Remus just buried his face in his hands in embarrassment, while Peter and James laughed and nudged Remus hyping him up. But Sirius couldn’t help but notice the smile on Remus’ face when he finally looked up from his hands. It was then that Sirius felt a tickle in the back of his throat and tried to clear it out.
“Hey anyone have a bottle of water?” he asked horsley. Peter grabbed some from his bag and handed it over to Sirius,
”You better not be getting sick Pads, the year hasn’t even started yet” James had said as Sirius took a sip of the water, Peter and Remus nodding in agreement
“Ah don’t worry it's just a tickle in my throat is all.” Sirius said with a smirk, he did hope he wasn’t getting sick.
---
Sirius supposed he must be getting a cold, because at the feast later that night he had started to get a cough. It was right when he noticed the ravenclaw boy staring at remus from across the hall. He didn’t think much of it until the next afternoon when they were in the common room during their off period. He had gone into a coughing fit.
“so, Remus whats up with this ravenclaw boy that keeps flirting with you” James had been saying
“i honestly don’t know, we’ve only met a few times before, i mean i dont even know his name-” Remus’ answer was cut of by Sirius trying to hold in a cough which just made him go into a coughing fit.
“Are you sure you’re alright Sirius? Maybe you should go to Madam Pomfreys” Peter had said
“No I’m fine, its just a cold is all” Sirius insisted, while the others continued to look concerned but didn’t bother to argue. this went on for a few days until finally one night, Sirius decided to go to bed earlier then his friends and went into a coughing fit. He could feel something in the back of his throat, he almost gagged on it as he coughed it up and it landed in the palm of his hand. A flower petal, a small white flower petal. How had he coughed up a flower pedal? Sirius decided to keep this to himself he didn’t need his friends fussing and insisting he go to madam pomfrey, so he stuck it in the drawer of the night stand next to his bed and layed down to go to sleep.
Over the next week it just got worse, until eventually he coughed up a whole flower, a daffodil, a white daffodil. It had become a problem in his classes too, going into coughing fits every so often, until finally Mcgonagall sent him to Madam pomfreys. He insisted that he didn’t need to that it was just a cold.
 “Oh come on Minnie, It’s just a cold. i don’t need to go to madam pomfreys”  But she was more stubborn and, finally, he gave in. 
“Alright Alright im going” and he picked up his bag and started the walk over to the infirmary.
“hmm this is most unusual, i’ve only seen this a small handful of times” Madam Pomfrey had said, “what you’ve got Black, is called the Hanahaki disease” 
“Im sorry the what disease?” madam pomfrey made a small grunt of frustration
“The Hanahaki disease, its an extremely rare disease where the patient coughs up flower petals, it’s caused when someone suffers from a one sided love” she had a sad look on her face now. 
“well how do you cure it?” Sirius was more then ready to stop coughing up flowers, but madam pomfrey didn’t respond right away. She didn’t bustle off to get some potion for him to drink, she didn’t assure him that he’d be out of there in a couple days, or hours. She just stood there with a sad look on her face, until in a very quiet voice she responded
“it stops when the love is returned, or- or when- when the patient dies.” Sirius stared at her dumbfounded, he was going to die? 
“I- I’m going, to die?” he continued staring up at her from the bed he was sitting on. she let out a small sob and nodded slowly.
“I must go inform your head of house and the head master” she said quickly before bustling off to her office. Sirius couldn’t believe it, was he really going to die? there was still a chance though, if Remus could love him back, but he quickly shut that idea down. That wasn’t going to happen. 
Sirius layed down, resting his hands over his stomach and his ankles crossed, he stared up at the ceiling. Of all the times he thought he might die, this time was by far the scariest, his love for Remus was quite literally, was going to kill him. he could feel his eyes filling up with tears as he let out a shaky breath, and quickly blinked them away.
he wasn’t quite sure how long he was laying there before he heard voices, hushed whispers he couldn’t quite make out. He sat up slowly, using his hands to prop himself up, looking around for who was talking. He looked to his right to see madam pomfrey, mcgonagall, and dumbledore, they noticed him watching and made their way over.
“why the long faces?” sirius cracked a smile for a second before it disappeared. 
“so McG, how long have i got?” He said with false enthusiasm, and she let out a small, sad, chuckle.
“well madam pomfrey estimates a little- a little over a week” Sirius’ smile fell, he hadn’t expected to have such little time.
“oh,” he paused for a minute, a sad silence falling over them, “I don’t want anyone to know- please. and i can keep going to classes right?” he said the last part with a hopeful glint in his eyes. Madam pomfrey had looked surprised at this 
“go to classes? I must insist you stay in here” 
“no please i want to go to classes, i can’t stay in here until- until- please” he looked up at them with sad but hopeful look on his face.
“oh alright, there isnt much i can do anyways, but i must insist that if it starts to get bad you come here immediately” she said after a long pause 
“as for not telling your friends, if you dont wish for them to know then we have no right to tell them. although it is my personal opinion that you should, your friends care deeply for you. yet i will not make you” Dumbledore spoke for the first time, as he looked sadly at Sirius.
---
the next week went pretty normally for the most part. James, Remus, and Peter had gotten increasingly more worried with each passing day, but gave up pestering Sirius about it, because each time they would he would get annoyed or just change the subject. It was nice that they cared but he just didn’t want them to treat him any different than usual, which they were sure to do if he told them he was dying.
Sirius was in their dorm alone having another coughing fit, he could feel the flower in the back of his throat, except it felt longer, was more painful. He could feel it scratching his throat as it cam up slowly until the head of the daffodil was in his mouth. He reached into his mouth and pulled it out the rest of the way, gagging as he did so. He gasped for breath as the flower fell on to his bed, he could taste the metallic flavor of the blood in his throat.  He looked down at the flower on his bed, a beautiful white daffodil, stem and all. this wasn’t the last one with a stem, oh no far from it. 
they got worse as time went by, he had to excuse himself at least once per class period so he could pull out the flowers. All his teachers were informed of his disease, so they never tried to stop him. by the end of the week his throat had been scratched raw, and he was coughing blood regularly.
---
Sirius knew he only had a few days left if that, when James had walked in on him siting on his bed crying softly. James didn’t ask what was wrong, he didn’t say anything. He just walked over to Sirius and hugged him, it was almost like he knew, like he knew Sirius’ time was limited. they sat like that for awhile, Sirius sniffling every now and then with James’ arm wrapped around him.
it was 2 days latter when Sirius walked out of charms and headed straight for the bathroom, he could feel it in the back of his throat as he all but ran to the bathroom. He burst the door open running over to the sink as he tried to cough up the daffodil. This one was much worse then usual, he could feel the blood in the back of his throat with the daffodil. he fell onto his knees, his hands in front of him holding himself up. his vision was blurry as gagged and choked on the flower trying to get it out. when he felt a pair of arms around him, someone was calling his name.
“Sirius, Sirius!” it was Remus, he must’ve followed him when he walked out of class. it was another few seconds before Sirius finally coughed up the flower, and quite a bit of blood too. But he still couldn't breathe properly, he felt his eyes brimming with tears as he thought, this is it, im dying, he heard Remus yelling for James.
“JAMES! JAMES GET IN HERE!” he heard the door fly open and a few seconds later felt another pair of hands helping him up. he looked back at the floor, it was a gruesome sight, a pool of blood with a disturbingly beautiful snow white daffodil in the middle. It took sirius a minute to realize that they were walking, that they had left the bathroom already, in fact they were almost to the infirmary. 
Sirius could hear crying, was it remus? was he crying? he heard another set of doors open and Peter yelling for help. Peter, when did Peter get here? had he been here the whole time?
madam pomfrey came rushing over telling James and Remus where to lay Sirius down. He heard her insisting that they leave, that they wait outside. He heard their protests, saying they wanted to stay with their friend. Sirius had started to cry, he didn’t want to go, he didn’t want to leave his friends.
---
Remus was sitting in charms with Sirius, James, and Peter when Sirius stood up abruptly and rushed out. Sirius had done this almost every class period. Remus looked over at james and peter who also wore concerned expressions. 
“come on” muttered remus, and they all stood up and followed after sirius.
Sirius had been sick ever since the train ride to school and every time any of them brought it up he got frustrated and changed the subject. well no more they wanted to know what was wrong and they weren’t leaving till the got them.Not only this, but he had been acting even weirder since his trip to madam pomfreys last week when mcgonagall had made him go.
“i’ll go in and see if he’s alright, and you two wait out here, sound good?” remus looked at James and Peter who both nodded in agreement. 
remus opened the bathroom door and walked in to find sirius kneeling on the floor with a very small pool of blood under where his head was hanging. “oh my gosh” remus said quietly, rushing over to him. remus fell down to his knees next to sirius, and wrapped his arms around him. 
“sirius, sirius!” remus tried to get his attention but he didnt respond. his coughs were shaking his whole body as he coughed something up, was it? was that a flower? he coughed up a lot of blood, they were now almost sitting in a small pool of it. remus thought maybe sirius would be able to catch his breath now he had coughed up the flower but he couldnt. remus could hear sirius trying, and failling to breath in enough air. they needed to get him to madam pomfreys, but remus couldnt get sirius up on his own.
“JAMES! JAMES GET IN HERE!” James burst in through the door, and only froze for a second at the sight before rushing over to sirius’ other side to help him up.
“we need to get to madam pomfreys” remus informed jamesas they lifted him up, one arm over each of their shoulders. they walked with sirius in between them down to the infirmary, as they walked sirius had started to cry still trying to breathe properly
“it’s alright” james had started whispering to sirius, although he was so out of it, he probably didn’t hear him. 
once they got to the infirmary peter went ahead of them to hold open the door and call for madam pomfrey.
“madam pomfrey, help! its sirius!” she was there in an instant directing them where to put him down,,
“there that bed there, set him down. nice and easy now.” as soon as they had let him down madam pomfrey was telling them to wait outside.
“i need you guys to wait outside, you dont need to see this” they immediately started protesting.
“no im not leaving!”
“he needs us!”
“we’re his friends!”
but they gave in and waited outside.
as soon as they were outside remus collapsed into a ball onto the floor, and started crying. James and Peter sat next to him, James putting his arm around him and pulled him into his side.
“is he going to die? there was so much blood, he was covered in it” Peter had said quietly in his squeaky voice.
“dont talk like that peter, of course not” james had said, even though he wasnt quite sure he believed it. they sat there for a small moment before remus finally spoke.
“i love him” was all he said, in a soft, broken voice. “i can’t lose him, i- i cant”
James pulled him closer and said “i know, i know you do moony” James was letting his tears fall freely now as he rested his head on remus’
---
sirius rolled over onto his side hacking and coughing, he could see madam pomfrey there holding a bin for him to cough up anything he needed to. when suddenly he could breathe again, just like that. he took in a deep breathe and let it out, doing that a few times. his vision started clearing up, everything wasn’t so black, he rolled over onto his back and took a deep breath of sweet sweet fresh air.
----
a/n: sorry this ended up being much longer then i originally intended,  anyway i hope you enjoyed! i might post this again later but not sure yet.. also if this is terrible im so sorry, i havent  written in ages and i didnt proof read this 
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minecraf-tiem-bby ¡ 5 years ago
Text
Google Docs is being shitty. Gonna post stuff here now so people can actually read it.
Clutching flowers, a boquet of Orchids and purple Hyacinth specifically, within his gloved hand, Sky swallowed the lump in his throat, hesitating in front of two weeping willow trees, before he continued on. He heard leaved and twigs crunch under his red boots as he went forward, memories filling his head no matter where he looked. Echoes of giggles and laughter long since silenced. Two little boys were who they had belonged to, running through the leaves of the trees, and climbing up to pick from the apple trees further down the path.
Despite those times having been so many years ago, Sky could still recall the taste of the freshly picked apples, the scent of the bark after it had rained and they went splashing in the mud. The smell of the snow, and the saddness when they realized there would be no more sweet and crisp apples until the next Spring came. And Sky could still remember their last spring here, which neither of them had known that it would be.
With each step forward, it felt like it got harder to move, guilt weighing heavy on his chest and in his bones. It felt like he was trudging his feet through the muck of a battleground stained with blood. And that's honestly what he thought it felt like.
Despite the fact he only looked straight forward, he could still see rusted and broken remnants of a childhood Treehouse out of the corner of his eye, a rope ladder long since decayed, and a tire swing long since abandoned with a few rotting planks laying up against a pile of bramches that no longer had any use. Blinking the tears out of his purple eyes, he looked up to see that the sky was such a clear, pretty blue. The kind of sky you wouldn't mind taking nap in under the shade of a tree as it turned into dusk.
There was not a whole lot aside from memories here. Memories that had turned sour like milk left out too long. Only difference was that the memories were sour woth the distinct, rotting taste of death that ruined any beautiful thing it came into contact with, turning it bitter and hurtful to contact with. It truly was such a pity. This little grove where he now walked, had been such a pretty place. Now it was nothing but a place of regret and forgotten friendly faces.
Sky could feel the emotions weighing heavy on his heart as he got closer to the end of the path, where a crystal blue lake sat, fed by the shimmering river that came from the north. He could still remember how refreshing it felt to cannonball into the cool waters on a hot summer day, laughing as they splashed eachother and launched off a tree to see who could make a bigger splash within the waters.
Heaving a heavy sigh, Sky turned away from the beautiful waters of the lake, to where a life sized statue stood upon it's pedestal, face forever in the kind smile with dimples that he had last seen on it's last wheezing breath. Pastel blue eyes permanently closed. Arms crossed in front of it's chest, one hand that clasped a golden and citrine quartz amulet and the other with it's palm face up. Standing straight up, but with big wings sprouting from it's back, and a plaque made of gold adorned with Silver that read 'Here lies Harving Osiris O'Brian. Loving son and brother. Forever in our hearts'
"Still such a cheesy thing, eh?" Sky murmured, seemingly talking to the statue as he placed the flowers in the statue's open palm.
"Still can't believe you slipped in right under me" he gave a dry laugh, sitting on the slightly damp grass, "Wish you would've at least approached me... First and last time I see you in ten fucking years.. And it's you bleeding your guts out while apologizing... Fuckin' hell, Harv..."
Sky rubbed a hand across his tured face. His eyebags were prominent and stubble scratchy, while he stared up at the statue of his younger brother.
"But I do just wish that you were still here with me.. If not within the recruits, then somehwere else.. Living your life.. It would've been better than.. Than bring just one more causality size feet below ground" Sky's voice began to break the more he talked, tears threatening at his eyes.
"I-I-I-I.. I should've protected you.. I-I-I should've been a better brother, and a better son to Ma.. I-I should've tried harder to save you I should've done so much fucking more but I didn't and- and NOW?? YOU'RE FUCKING DEAD. I CANT FUCKING HUG YOU OR TELL YOU HOE FUCKING SORRY I AM THAT YOU FELT THAT THE ONLT WAY TO SEE ME AGAIN WAS TO BECOMR A FUCKING RECRUIT GOD DAMMIT HARVING!!! THERE WAS OTHER FUCKING WAYS!! AND NOW THE-THERE ISNT SHIT I CAN DO BECAUSE YOU AREN'T FUCKING ALIVE ANYMORE! IT HURTS SO FUXKING MUCH TO EVEN THINK ABOUT YOUR BIRTHDAY OR YOUR DEATHDAY! IF ONLY I HAD LOOKED A LITTLE CLOSER, PAYED MORE ATTENTION, BEEN A BETTER FUCKING PERSON YOU WOULDN'T BE GONE RIGHT NOW AND I'D ACTUALLY ABLE TO HOLD YOU IN MY ARMS PROPERLY AGAIN!! YOU COULD'VE BEEN SO FUCKING MUCH MORE THAN A CORPSE!!" He couldn't stop his tears or his yelling, blaming himself over everything as he punched the ground, grass and dirt going flying while his voice echoed throughout the forest.
"But... But I couldn't even protect my own brother... How the fuck am I supposed to protect an army...?"
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