#sorry the post you tagged was really long so I didn't want to reply on that one
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@scarefox
I don't think AI's will match human creativity until they're frighteningly close to sentient, and by then we'll be having a much bigger problem addressing their rights and the ethics of forcing a sentient entity to perform slave labor. Senioritis is a beast but the art industry has done been f*cked for ages so you might as well do whatever brings you joy. Granted I'm saying this as an ex-designer and an (as yet) unsuccessful comic artist who lives in corporate housing behind a barn. My best art work the year after I graduated came about from having a boring office job where I spent my days stuck in a tiny bank vault, supervising a printer.
When I first tried to break into illustration I got instantly K.O.'d in the marketplace by photobashers and guys from island nations selling traced Disney art. AI is just one more hurdle like all the others. Won't be the last.
#artist problems#mbrainspaz replies#sorry the post you tagged was really long so I didn't want to reply on that one#old guy rambles about their life#ai vs artists#ai art generator
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Growing up, we had these beautiful Abert's Squirrels around. They have these big bushy tails and long tufted ears. Gray fur and white bellies.
My grandparents who raised me loved to watch them out on the porch, they put special birdseed out just for them and would watch them every morning.
My Papa especially loved them. He set up his recliner by the big full windows in the living room so he could watch them and the birds all day while he read the paper and his book. He built he house himself 40 years ago and made sure the entire wall of the living room facing the porch was all windows. It was his and my favorite room in the whole house.
One day, while driving, an Abert's Squirrel darted across the road, too fast for Papa to stop hisnold truck, and he hit it. He slammed on the brakes, but it was too late.
He was devestated. He was a military man all his life. Fought in Vietnam. Before that he was raised in a town so rural that the school was only one room. He was taught men don't show emotions, especially over "trivial" things. Him hitting that squirrel to this day is the closest I've seen to him crying.
My Grandmother is a tiny, gentle, deeply compassionate woman who would set out slices of pear for the wasps to eat. She cried openly. She collected the squirrel with a towel and wrapped it gently, and told Papa she would find a good place to bury it. Maybe in the garden.
But since Papa had tried to stop the truck, the squirrel wound up barely being touched by the impact. It was in almost perfect condition. Still soft and beautiful.
Papa has a few hunting trophies. A pheasant he was particularly proud of is his favorite. Grandma took the squirrel to hid taxidermist in secret and had it made into a piece.
Its a beautiful piece of taxidermy. She had them pose the squirrel on a branch as if it was climbing one of the pines and had stopped to look curiously at you, its head cocked and its fluffy tail up. Its black button eyes are big and dark and look truly alive again.
She gave it to him that Christmas. It's been displayed in our living room ever since, where Papa can see it while he reads, and the squirrel can look out the window with him.
#it didn't make up for the animal's detah#but it was my grandparents- my parents#my parents legally speaking-#way of honoring it. and I always thought it was very tender and beautiful.#Papa is autistic the same way I am. I see myself in him all the time#each day he becomes more tender. age has made him kind in a way he couldn't be for most of my childhood.#he turned 90 very recently. he was born in the 1930s smack dab in the middle of the dust bowl#he had relatives that trainhopped to california but he stayed in Oklahoma#i've been thinking about him so much lately#his memory is starting to deteriorate#I live so far from him now but I want to talk to him every day#his voice lights up when I call and he always tells me “Looking forward to hearing from you tomorrow!”#he has a big deep booming voice that rarely sounds below a shout. people often think hes angry when he isnt. he has trouble regulating tone.#but Im very good at reading it now. the love in it.#Im sorry for posting such a long reply to a poll and going on and on in the tags. i just love my Papa so much. I call him Daddy now because#he really is my father he raised me since i was a baby. and it made him so happy when i asked if i could. and my grandma when i asked#if i could call her Mama. She cried again.#if anyone reads this I'd like to know. I dont usually talk here. this all just spilled out of me.
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LOVER'S QUARREL
- fushiguro megumi x reader
“i can't do this anymore.” you and megumi are just too different; he's stoic, you're bubbly, he prefers solitude, you love being social. it starts with fights, words you don't mean, and ends with an event that would haunt him for a long time to come.
genre/warnings: angst, breaking up, post-breakup feelings, mentions and description of injury and blood, hurt/comfort, fluff in the end (you make up!)
note: dear god i’m finally getting this out of my drafts. loosely inspired by real life events i’ve seen around my friend’s relationship sooo it might hurt a bit 🤏🏻 but who can say no to angst to eventual fluff? tagging @lees-chaotic-brain and @kasumitenbaz (as per request in the ask!), you two are always here for my megumi works, thank you!! :3 and thank you for dropping by for the event!
a part of 1K MILESTONE EVENT
general masterlist
Everyone pointed it out as a joke, that you liked him way more than he did you.
And you used to never let it ruffle you. To you, Megumi’s sternness and silence meant that he was comfortable with you. You never wanted him to change his ways just because now you were seeing each other.
But when you thought it over now, as you stood before him with an aghast expression and knives stabbing your kind, soft heart, you couldn’t help but do a double-take.
You were the one who confessed first. Most of the time, you were the one who initiated dates. You always texted him first, asking about his day, and even when he brushed you off, you would keep being this ball of sunshine and wished him a good day.
You never realized it before… that through everything, it has always been you. Unfailingly.
So how dare he spout this now?
“I can't do this anymore.”
"You... can't?" you spat out, feeling the first tendrils of anger course through you. "What exactly it is that you can't do? What do you even mean?"
"Look," Megumi stared at you squarely, and you thought now, that it was the coldest of eyes, straight and true. "It's always been like this between us lately. It's only right that we end this."
This, he said. He didn't even want to define your relationship anymore.
You scoffed. "And why do you think we always end up this way? Have you ever considered, even once, that it's because you make no effort at all?"
"I'm trying," Megumi quickly replied, almost in a hiss, and you almost recoiled. "But I just see that we'll end up nowhere, that's why I'm bringing this up now."
Oh, that freaking hurts. You boyfriend had just told you that this relationship would go nowhere. Right in your face.
Your eyes stung with tears, yet you fought to hold them back, fixing your gaze on the lamp overhead and inhaling deeply.
"You're... selfish," you stated, filled with ire. "You're always walking around eggshells around me, never telling me what is it that you really want��"
Megumi's unclouded eyes fixed on your trembling form. "We just disagree on a lot of things. You know it and it bothers you. It bothers me too. Rather than forcing our relationship, I think it's better—"
"It's always me!" you yelled then, lips quivering and eyes watering, unable to hold your emotions back any longer. "All dates, lunches—everything!" you locked your eyes with him, in mocking disbelief. "How can you say you're trying when, in truth, I'm the one putting in so much for us?!"
In that very second, Megumi thought that he hated seeing you like this. You were supposed to be the cheerful one in this relationship, and when he agreed to go out with you, he made an unspoken commitment to himself that he would at least not make you miserable.
And yet...
"...I'm sorry."
Came his reply, and you were sure that this was it.
And to rub the salt in your wound, he added, "I can't lie to you and say I haven't thought this for a while too."
As tears welled within you, you wondered and questioned what you lacked that led to this. However, the overwhelming sense of betrayal consuming your thoughts ultimately prevailed over any other emotions.
Now he could've appeared before you as a stranger and you wouldn't bat an eye, as the cold steel in his tone said, "And if blaming me is what it takes to make you feel better, then so be it."
You couldn't pinpoint the source of your sudden boldness, but in the next hot minute, you marched past him, your shoulder harshly colliding with his in a deliberate, almost spiteful manner—which, indeed, was your intention—and then you ran.
Which led to the next scene: you found yourself bawling your eyes out in the girls' lavatory.
Yuji and Nobara saw everything unfolding right before their eyes. They hadn't meant to eavesdrop, but you and Megumi were literally breaking up right the middle of their shared classroom, and it was hard not to follow the discourse until the end.
"Are you okay?" Nobara had come to your side, ensuring privacy by locking the restroom door out of your consideration. You were a sobbing mess, attempting to wipe the overflowing tears away while letting out all your emotions.
"He's..." Your voice faltered amid sobs as you gazed at your steadfast friend, your throat clogging up. "He said... he's been wanting t-to... break up with m-me..."
"That's okay, that's okay..." Nobara brought you to her arms, patting your back in reassurance. "Fushiguro is insensitive like that... don't cry over him now. He's just a wimp, okay?"
"Why is it me?" you asked her, voice brittle, still shaking with tears. "I t-tried everything! Being the supportive girlfriend..."
"If he can't appreciate what you did, then the problem lies with him," your friend stated, traces of irritation brewing in her resolute gaze. And as she firmly grasped your wrist, her next words resonated. "Not you."
. . .
"Do you really have to break her heart like that?" Yuji fidgeted with his hoodie, staring at his best friend with a blend of confusion and sympathy.
Megumi sighed, finally ruffling his hair into a mess, as if expressing his own state of mind. “This is for the best.”
Yuji’s eyebrows visibly creased. “How is this ‘for the best’? She’s miserable, and you…” he assessed him, scanning him from head to toe, “it doesn’t seem you’re faring any better too.”
“The longer she is with me, the unhappier she will be.” Megumi glanced at the bathroom’s direction. “She can deserve better.”
He was always too quiet, too boring, not able to match your energy too. He couldn’t fault you for expecting more, whereas he was just not exactly built for your expectations.
Megumi really thought he wanted it to end. At one point, it even felt like a chore, but…
How strange. Why did it feel like something was clawing at his chest?
Time heals. Megumi knew that by theory, but he really did see it firsthand when he saw you all giggling and happy again three weeks after he initiated the breakup.
With Hakari.
“Yo, what are you glaring at?” Panda asked, but Megumi didn’t pay him any mind.
An upperclassman, Hakari Kinji, was naturally cool and talented. He was laid back, knew how to have fun—all in all, a total opposite of Fushiguro Megumi altogether.
Three weeks. It’s only been three weeks since then.
“Megumi?”
Wait… Aren’t three weeks too fast to get over your ex?
“Megumi!”
“Huh?” he turned to the sentient panda with a jerk. “Oh, what is it?”
He looked at him with a concerned gaze. "Why do you look so scary? It's almost as if you're about to punch someone..."
But who was he to argue? He had no right to be upset now.
"Is it Kinji?" Panda gasped, finally putting two and two together when he followed his line of sight. "Oh Megumi... but you—"
"Just shut up, please," he blurted then, a hint of annoyance in his tone. With that, Panda didn't pursue it further, leaving him with his thoughts.
From where he was at the field, he could clearly see your radiant smile for Hakari. It was clear that the two of you shared a degree of friendship, but Megumi never knew that you two were that close.
...huh?
Why did the sight irritate him so suddenly? Why did his chest twinge again?
What a fool. You're the one driving her away, you idiot.
Suddenly these memories popped up one by one—
Of you suddenly hugging him from behind in an attempt to surprise him.
How he pressed his lips on the crown of your head when you fall asleep on his shoulder.
How you would give him that dopey smile when he pulled you close.
But on harder days after missions gone wrong, he’d ignore you altogether— the slight disappointment in your smile then. How your expression fell when he told you to go. How you slumped and looked back in hopes of him changing his mind.
“Haaaah.” Megumi turned away, unwilling to keep watching you any longer. Why? Why hadn’t it occurred to him before now?
Why did he long for you now? Why not before, when you were still his?
They were right. It seems people tend to desire what isn't meant for them.
What could have been more painfully awkward than being sent into a mission with your ex-boyfriend?
You would kill Gojo for this. Or at least give him the lowest possible score in his teaching evaluation for the year. How could he? Your breakup was an infamous public spectacle, so this setup was undoubtedly intentional!
You were losing your head over this, and yet your ex-boyfriend...
"Keep your guard up," Megumi reminded curtly, in a warning tone. He looked as vigilant and straight as always, as if he wasn't even bothered.
You threw him a dirty look, offended. "You don't have to tell me twice."
This just cranked up the discomfort to an excruciating level. The mix of unresolved tension and memories—okay, you might be an emo, but how were you supposed to be cool with all of these hanging in the air?
Your site of exorcism was an abandoned warehouse, and the cursed spirit in question was supposed to be a grade 3. You two were grade 2 sorcerers now, so you were a perfect fit to exorcise it. But there was indeed this unease in the air that you couldn't put your finger to.
"Isn't it awfully too quiet?" you unwittingly muttered, staring at the darkness of the wall. You couldn't feel any cursed energy belonging to any possible malevolent entity, and that was what unsettled you the most.
Megumi frowned at your line of sight. "It is. Stay close."
You blinked at what he said, and before you knew it, the familiar scent of him being near to you made your entire body burst with this equally familiar warmth. When you looked up to him, seeing the solid sharpness in that dark eyes of his and his jaw set, dead butterflies in your chest rose back to life again, against your heartbreak and better judgement.
Stay close, he said... So he is worried...
And in an attempt to hide how flustered you were, you looked down.
You walked a few good steps, when suddenly he asked, "So, are you with Hakari-senpai now?"
"Huh?" You spun around, your expression a mix of surprise and confusion.
"You two seem close."
Seem close? Seem close... wait, so Megumi had noticed...?
Suddenly, you felt incited and it made you angry. "That's none of your business," your voice carried a sharp edge, hissing. And you knew you were being a bit mean by adding, "You broke up with me, so why do you even care?"
In that moment, Megumi could've sworn his chest throbbed. Your cutting tone pierced directly into his heart, lodging itself there.
You had all rights to be annoyed, and he knew that. Why did that question even slip out of him?
"Nah, nevermind," he mumbled in response, looking away.
Awkwardness lingered afterwards. You hated this, but no, you weren't above being petty. He had broken your heart and it still stung even now. If your intentionally biting words did to him even a fraction of what he made you feel, then you would find a small sense of satisfaction in it.
But you weren't able to ponder about your mess of feelings further when Megumi abruptly yanked your arm, his voice soaking with urgency, "It's here!"
Sure enough, the grotesque cursed spirit with the shape of a giant bee broke through the walls with a bang. The two of you immediately readied your fighting stance. Megumi was ready with his divine dogs, while you with your cursed weapon.
For a while, you engaged the cursed spirit with all you had. You were trying to focus on the enemy, but you couldn't help but notice the way Megumi always looked at you every few seconds, checking for any signs of injury or harm.
Frankly speaking, he trusted your strength and knew that you were a capable sorcerer. You had been paired in a mission before and he knew both your potential and shortcomings. It was just there was something about this place that had his senses on high alert.
And his fears were proven true when you yelped and were flung onto the grimy floor. "Y/N!"
"I'm fine!" you shouted in a rush, scrambling to your feet. However, as you spun towards him, your scream tore through the hall as you caught sight of the bee lurking behind him. "Megumi!"
He got distracted. The bee quickly latched onto him and almost stung him, until he wrestled it off and summoned Nue and exorcised it.
You went to his side that instant. "Are you okay?!"
"I am." But then he winced and almost fell on his knees if you didn't have a secure grip on him. He savored your touch and breathed a sigh of relief, thinking that now you two were safe.
"Megumi! Oh god!" Panic surged through you as you pulled him close. His side was bleeding, and you widened your eyes at the sight.
"I'm okay, I promise," he rasped, looking you in the eyes. "What abo—"
Then you saw it, the flicker from deep from that corner of platform, and suddenly, you grasped the source of the unease that had been lingering within you all this time. It wasn't the bee Megumi had just exorcised—
At that moment, there was no room for thought, one thing was certain: you didn't want him to get hurt more.
He didn't manage to finish his sentence when suddenly you pushed him away with so much force he never thought you had. Everything crashed so suddenly, he didn't have the time to brace himself or grab you with him, as another cursed bee appeared out of nowhere and—
Reality flashed before his eyes as he stared at you in sheer horror. At how the cursed spirit tore your body, sinking its hollow stinger in you.
You didn't really know what happened next. Everything was muffled—the frantic movements around you turned into a blur, along with Megumi's yells. Otherworldly pain coursed through your entire being and your ears rang, then everything in your line of sight became distorted and faded, along with your consciousness. Next and the last thing you knew was Megumi's battered face, a final imprint before you succumbed to the void.
Megumi had exorcised the remaining cursed spirit and staggered to his feet—falling a few times, but he made his way towards you through gritted teeth. You are hurt. He forced himself to get to you and pull you into his arms.
And suddenly, suddenly, nothing mattered anymore as overwhelming terror consumed him upon seeing you. Blood streamed from your abdomen so much that it made a continuous pool.
"You stupid—!" He choked out, voice hitching. You were no longer conscious and it devastated him even more. "Hey, hey? Wake up—hells—"
You, who did everything you could to save your relationship. You, who cried tears for him when he blatantly broke your heart. And you, who put himself first—and now facing the consequences.
It crashed upon him in that very second, the clarity. What was he thinking back then? He still loves you.
"If you die on me, I won't forgive you."
Megumi scooped you in his arms, pressing you close to his chest, the blood seeping from his wound be damned as he looked at your serene face. His heart shattered in the worst way possible and he almost wheezed at the sticky sensation of your blood—and how lifeless you felt in his grasp—but he willed it away.
"Don't," his broken rasp echoed the walls as he took each step to get both of you out of this hellhole. He winced and hissed at his own injury, chewing his lip in frustration, at how helpless he was.
"Don't leave me."
It was like a distant, hazy memory.
Was it a memory though? No. It seemed far too real for that.
The throbbing headache pounding through your skull and shivers that wracked your body pulled you back to reality. There was a heavy pressure on your abdomen and any movement sent sharp pain shooting through you.
You gradually opened your eyes, squinting against the brightness. You were in a hospital gown, an IV was injected on your arm, and the sterile scent made your stomach twist, as nausea creeping through your guts. Your vision was still blurry as you tried to look around to find someone who waited for you. As you slowly turned your head to the side, you saw him, sitting in the chair right next your bed.
Megumi was sleeping in such uncomfortable position, his head resting on the edge of your bed. He appeared peaceful, almost childlike, devoid of his usual stoic demeanor.
Your heartstrings were tugged at this rare sight. He also sustained injuries and yet... he was waiting for you to wake up, here.
Your chest swelled with warmth, which was quickly followed by a sting of heartbreak. Still, you two broke up...
You jolted, and the inadvertent movement sent a wave of pain that seemed to paralyze your nerves, causing you to whimper. The noise woke Megumi from his slumber, as he shot his eyes open in alarm, catching your hand in his.
"Hey... Are you okay?" Megumi worriedly looked down at you with a visible frown, and the grimace of pain on your face, accompanied by trembling lips, was enough of an answer. He hastily scrambled out in slight panic, "I'll get Ieiri-san."
When Shoko came and got you the painkillers, your pain receded somewhat. Through it all, Megumi stood there, casting concerned glances in your way.
"Bedrest for the week," Shoko stated firmly, assessing your wound with a no-nonsense expression. "Your injury isn't minor—it's serious enough that you're strongly advised against excessive movement."
You could only nod in response. Megumi bowed. "Thank you, Ieiri-san." Once the doctor departed, silence settled over the room once more.
“Why did you do that?” he quietly asked then, referring to what you did for him. And when you turned to him, you saw it clearly.
He looked pale, and there was this haunted look in his eyes. It broke your heart a little.
"You were hurt." Your voice came out dry, and you realized firsthand just how parched you were. Seeing Megumi looking down never quite sat right with you. He was meant to be an unwavering presence, someone strong enough to sway your convictions.
However, a pang struck when he countered with stern eyes, "You didn't have to do that."
...he was right. You didn't have to. What he didn't know was that you were still holding on these stupid feelings, which drove you to shield him. It made you ponder: if your roles were reversed, would he not step in to protect you at all?
"Why are you here?" You weren't sure if the bitterness in your tone was evident, but you continued anyway. "You don't have to be here either."
"Don't have to?" His gaze bore disbelief, as if not believing your words. "I'm—"
"If it's because I saved you, Megumi—"
“Do not even think, even for a moment, that I won’t be concerned over you.” His voice, deep and hoarse, struck you to the core, silencing your words. “Never. I always, always want you to be safe.”
Your mind became a blank slate. Suddenly, all that mattered was his voice.
"Don't you realize how terrifying it was? Seeing you like that?" Megumi spat, his green eyes shining with intensity, teeth gritted and fists clenched. "How could you even think that I wouldn't be here—" his breath hitched, and then his lips trembled slightly, "—for you?"
You blinked quickly, a feeling stirred within you—stemming from that cursed, fragile heart of yours to be exact, evident from the rapid thumping in your chest.
You dumbly uttered, "But we are—"
"Oh, Goddamnit." Megumi cursed, and honestly you were taken aback. It wasn't really in him to swear, so this really bugged him. He ran a hand through his hair in frustration, and despite the situation, your heart skipped a beat at the sight. Even a mess in a hospital gown, your ex-boyfriend was still undeniably attractive.
He stared at you squarely in the eye, unflinching, steadfast and true, the very image of Fushiguro Megumi you admired from afar and fell in love with in the first place half a year ago. "You don't have to... say anything, if you don't want to. Right now... just hear me out."
And the things he said next... all of them, you could say, caught you entirely off guard.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not trying hard enough, and—damn it, for making you sad. I never, ever wanted to see you that upset."
Megumi drew in a sharp breath, averting his gaze. "And for days, I've wondered if you and Hakari-senpai are now a thing... and you know what? I hate it so much. I know I have no grounds to feel this way, after what I did, but..."
And like a train wreck, his final words hit you hard. Tears welled up in your eyes in immediate response.
“I'm a loser, and a coward too, maybe,” he shrugged, a tinge of self-deprecation in his tone. “And I suck at telling people my feelings, but I love you. I still do.”
A sob slipped out of your throat and you hastily pulled the blanket over your face, much to his surprise. He thought he had worsened things, with the way you were turning away from him.
But then, from beneath the blanket, in a croaky voice, you proclaimed, "Fushiguro Megumi, you're a complete and utter idiot."
And Megumi didn't know that he had been holding back his breath as he chuckled heartily, relieved that you would still take his ass back after this prolonged mess. He knew he still had a lot to make up for and was determined to show it through his actions.
"Maybe I am, yeah."
"That's possibly the longest shit you have ever spouted in one breath."
"Yeah..."
But he got his chance back, and he knew that you would be alright. Both of you are.
On one sunny day...
"Hey, are you alone?"
Megumi glanced up from his phone, only to be met with a random girl standing in front of him, batting her eyelashes with an ambiguous intent. He blinked at her curiously.
"No. Can I help you?"
The girl twirled her hair suggestively. "Ah, you see... I see you all in your lonesome and I think you're quite cute—"
The hell? Megumi frowned, and he was really about to give this bimbo a piece of his mind when—
Oh, oh. Forget that. Megumi's attention snapped to you on the opposite side of the crossroad. All pretty and dolled up with that crop tee and miniskirt he once mentioned would look great on you by a slip of tongue—that accidental comment earned him your teasing quips for weeks already.
"Sorry, I'm here for my girlfriend. Bye."
Abruptly dismissing the girl, he didn't catch how comically offended she was for being turned down in a span of 20 seconds. He took big strides towards you, as you crossed the street, and you immediately beamed when you caught the sight of his face.
"Megumi!"
Ah, this is going to be a good day, he thought. As he gazed at your pretty face, and caught your hand in his, clasping it tightly, reveling in your scent and the warmth of your presence beside him—
He was content, and once again it dawned on him, that he likes you so, so damn much.
"Let's get started on our date, shall we?"
#fushiguro megumi x reader#jjk x reader#megumi fushiguro x reader#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x reader angst#megumi fushiguro x reader fluff#megumi fushiguro x reader angst#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader fluff#fushiguro x reader#megumi x reader#jjk fanfic#jjk imagines#fushiguro megumi fluff#fushiguro megumi x y/n#fushiguro megumi angst#jjk#megumi fluff#megumi fushiguro#jjk angst#jjk fluff
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i still miss the smoke | ollie bearman social media au
pairing: ollie bearman x fem singer ex reader
where there’s smoke, there’s fire and maybe we miss the warmth
MASTERLIST | TIP JAR
y/nfanpage
liked by kimiantonelli, user1 and 102,309 others
tagged: yourusername
y/nfanpage: folklore is finally out and i say for everyone: thank you y/n!!!! another banger i believe, what did you guys think?
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user2: my ears have been BLESSED
user3: she really looked inside my brain and created the exact thing i needed
user4: and THIS is why i have a parasocial relationship sorry!
user5: you can tell she's been writing this a long time because she still sounds so in love
user6: i don't want to be that person that makes all her music about the men but like she's so obviously still in love with ollie
user7: she put the songs invisible string and the 1 on this record and didn't think we would see that she's so in love still
user8: maybe she's hoping that he'll listen and call her?
kimiantonelli: HE BETTER FUCKING CALL JESUS CHRIST
this comment has been deleted
user8: why did an account with over a million followers just reply to me and then delete his comment?
user9: babe that was soon-to-be mercedes f1 driver kimi antonelli (he's ollie's current teammate)
user8: WHAT?
user10: surely this is a sign?
user11: mum come pick me up they've made up yet another conspiracy about y/n and ollie getting back together
user12: 1. they're still in love argue with the wall 2. fuck ur mum
user11: excuse me?
user12: i said what i said, kimi commenting has proved the fact ollie clearly misses y/n as much as folklore proves she misses him
user13: as an f1 fan it still actually boggles my mind that ollie was actually with Y/N Y/LN
user14: no it's crazy because when he got called up in saudi arabia the first thing charles said to him was 'why didn't you bring y/n we wanted to meet her'
user15: also like the way the viewer count spiked for saudi with all the y/n fans watching
user16: well some of us didn't leave so now i have another expensive hobby and an unhealthy attachment to both of them
olliebearman
liked by charles_leclerc, yourusername and 409,300 others
tagged: kimiantonelli
olliebearman: back to the action this weekend
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user17: thank you for my daily dose of bearnelli
user18: i can't believe both will be on the f1 grid next year 😭
user19: i hate that they won't be teammates
user20: you can't separate them they're like bonded cats
charles_leclerc: so when are you growing some balls and calling y/n?
olliebearman: huh?
charles_leclerc: answer me quickly oliver or you're not getting my car in FP1
olliebearman: i don't think you can do that?
charles_leclerc: do you wanna find out the hard way?
olliebearman: i know we have this cool father son thing going and i love that but STAY THE FUCK OF MY LOVE LIFE
charles_leclerc: i don't appreciate your tone young man
charles_leclerc: and i loved folklore and want my vinyl signed :P
olliebearman: go to a meet and greet like a normal person?
charles_leclerc: JUST CALL HER FOR FUCK SAKE
user21: so everyone lost their minds over the summer break i see
user22: well i hate to say it but they have a point - y/n is in the likes
user23: they're feeding my delusions i fear
kimiantonelli: we look like a couple here.... which reminds me ... you could be in a relationship ... if you just PICKED UP THE DAMN PHONE
olliebearman: do you fucking mind?
kimiantonelli: don't speak to me like that :(
olliebearman: this is my instagram page?
kimiantonelli: you keep fucking moping and it's bringing the mood down so do something about it for the love of god
olliebearman: stop airing me out online? I SAW UR TWEET
kimiantonelli: and yet she's still in your likes THERE'S STILL TIME JACKASS
user24: we're trusting these fools to drive f1 cars?
yourusername: i can see all of these comments?
this post has been deleted
f1insider
liked by user25, user26 and 21,843 others
tagged: olliebearman
f1insider: ollie meeting fans this weekend - one fan has stated that when she asked ollie to sign her y/n y/ln shirt he was more than happy to and said that his favourite song from the new album is invisible string and said "i'm still holding my end"
view all comments
user27: so he's freaking out about charles and kimi airing him out in public when he's spouting poetry to random f1 fans
user28: I WAS THE FAN and let me tell you bro was GOING THROUGH IT
user29: how so?
user28: well first of all he did a double take when he first saw my shirt and took time to properly look at it before signing - he knew in less than 5 seconds what his favourite song was and had this far off loved up look when he said about the invisible string
user29: oh he's so down bad
user30: the way i just know kimi was there groaning up a storm
user28: you would be correct
user31: someone needs to get that dude some compensation for real
user32: bro is coming into his f1 career known by the wider community as the guy who is the eternal third wheel to a couple who have been broken up for six months
user33: i'm sorry he can't say he's still holding onto the invisible string and just expect us all to be normal about it ?
user34: you can tell he's been with y/n though because before that the most eloquent thing he's said is when he sent carlos his condolences like he DIED
user35: we can't even say he's doing it for her attention because how did he know that the fan would run to social media
user36: based on how kimi is right now i'd put a lot of money on him going on like this at all times
user37: all this to say i hope they get back together because i think seeing y/n at an f1 race would send me into cardiac arrest
user38: she'd be up there for best ever wag i won't lie
user39: i do think she'd be the best but that's also because arguably ollie is more her wag
user40: they've mastered the lovestruck look of watching the person you love doing what they love
user41: we're all going to look so dumb if they never get back together
user42: SHUSH
yourusername
liked by kimiantonelli, olliebearman and 3,209,577 others
yourusername: you thought i was done? my bonus track 'the lakes' is out now!
view all comments
user43: STUNT ON THEM HOES
user44: this is such a funny comment in the context of how the music actually sounds
user45: okay well she's stepping on the girls' neck and hearing the snap like autumn leaves on the ground
charles_leclerc: amazing song once again y/n!
yourusername: thanks charles :)
charles_leclerc: now, what are we doing about this heartbroken son of mine?
yourusername: excuse me?
charles_leclerc: don't play coy with me miss, i know you're just as pathetically sad as him so why don't you get ur head out of the sand and call him up !!!!
yourusername: you know i saw all of your comments shouting at him to do the same thing
charles_leclerc: i'm standing on business - he was the one who deleted the post
yourusername: does he know you're doing that on my post as well then?
charles_leclerc: don't be stupid i know that fool still has your notifications on i can hear his phone buzzing every time you reply - he's trying to play it cool in the engineering meeting
yourusername: and you don't have to?
charles_leclerc: i told them it was a family emergency
yourusername: charles ????
charles_leclerc: whether you like it or not you are my grid daughter in law and so it does personally pain me when you IDIOTS don't see what is right in front of you - it's not like you have to use messenger pigeons, you can make it work
user46: i know ollie is going to have a heart attack when he finally reads this comments
charles_leclerc: he just snuck to the toilet and i could hear him drop his phone from the meeting room
olliebearman: STOP ARE YOU INSANE
olliebearman: also this is not "family drama" i was genuinely worried something had happened :/
yourusername: come on ollie you should know not to trust that man by now
user47: i know ^^ this is crazy but like bro THE LAKES ??? i swear in an interview y/n spoke about it was her and ollie's dream to spend christmas by the lakes?
user48: WE ARE SO FUCKING BACK
user49: plus the replies??? basically remarried
user50: genuine question for everyone in the comments talking about her getting back with this mystery man - why did they even break up?
user51: ollie was starting his f2 season that was going to secure him an f1 drive and y/n was starting an album cycle and finishing a tour so they broke up because of distance :(
user52: NOT FOR LONG :P
olliebearman
liked by charles_leclerc, kimiantonelli and 1,204,377 others
tagged: yourusername
olliebearman: i took her to the lakes where all the poets went to die (i didn't let her die)
view all comments
user54: WE HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE BACK
user55: shout out to kimi antonelli, you survived king
yourusername: you're such a cutie pie
olliebearman: just for you
yourusername: thanks for pushing me in the water and insisting on giving me mouth to mouth .... i think it might have been a front to kiss me tho
olliebearman: sue me, i've missed it :(
yourusername: you'll never be without it ever again
olliebearman: yay 🥳 🎉 😀 !!!!!!!!!
user56: why is he such a fucking nerd when his gf tells him she loves him
user57: he's so fucking real
charles_leclerc: FUCKING FINALLY
kimiantonelli: don't pretend you were on the front line old man
charles_leclerc: old man???? i'm 27
kimiantonelli: okay grandpa do you need directions to the nursing home
charles_leclerc: coming at me when fernando exists is a choice
kimiantonelli: i don't see fernando here complaining up a storm ?
fernandoalo_oficial: i am not taking sides here but the one time i have had a full conversation with ollie this season was during the pre-race parade and he spoke about y/n the whole time
yourusername: awwwww that's so cute bear :3
olliebearman: i told you i am obsessed with you
kimiantonelli: you don't say
olliebearman: just because you can't make references to bearnelli being real now
kimiantonelli: it's not real /??????????
yourusername: ???????
user58: just got her boyfriend back and is immediately has to battle his homoerotic situationship with his teammate
yourusername: i will never be free
olliebearman: he's just a funky lil guy babe, it would be rude to leave him out
kimiantonelli: yeah i'll take it!
kimiantonelli
liked by lewishamilton, olliebearman and 731,044 others
tagged: olliebearman, yourusername
kimiantonelli: WAR IS OVER
view all comments
user59: the way this man will never let them forget anything about this
user60: i know he's getting his evidence for his best man speech
kimiantonelli: you make a great point
olliebearman: that's a bold assumption that you would be my best man?
kimiantonelli: do not piss me off this morning oliver
yourusername: you can be my man of honour kimi :)
kimiantonelli: score !!!
olliebearman: how did we get here?
yourusername: i am weaponising your homoerotic tension against you
olliebearman: sure, you got me there
user61: are these people ever normal?
user62: nope!
user63: i know the merc and haas PR teams are shaking in their boots
user64: tbf i think haas will be welcoming it - i mean all the y/n fans will probably get the ollie merch next year ?
haasf1team: WE LOVE YOU Y/N 🥰
haasf1team: new wheel guns here we come - thanks y/n fans!
yourusername: thanks for being our lil messenger pigeon for these rough six months, we love you kimi <3
olliebearman: we're so lucky to have someone like you in our lives, forever grateful
kimiantonelli: i know i complained the whole time, i love you guys and i'd go through this weird three way conversation all over again
charles_leclerc: okay now this is all done @yourusername when are you coming to the paddock i have a lot of vinyls for you to sign!
yourusername: you've been very loud throughout this whole situation, why should i?
charles_leclerc: BECAUSE I LOVE YOUR MUSIC
charles_leclerc: and plus i do really want the best for both of you so i let kimi play nice cop
kimiantonelli: you were NOT in on this?
charles_leclerc: YOU'RE WELCOME 😉
olliebearman: let's all smile and wave
yourusername: 😃
kimiantonelli: 😃
yourusername
liked by kimiantonelli, charles_leclerc and 4,298,400 others
tagged: olliebearman
yourusername: i knew you were still the 1 for me x
view all comments
user66: back to flexing their love on us again
user67: i am cripplingly lonely but i am so happy for them
user68: honestly i think i've been through this breakup with them i also deserve compensation
yourusername: i only got so many hampers i'm sorry gal
maxverstappen1: is now an okay time to ask for tickets to the tour?
yourusername: yes! i'll grab you at a race and we can discuss what shows you want (spoiler alert it mostly lines up with the f1 calendar)
yourusername: also @charles_leclerc take notes on how to ask for things
maxverstappen1: schooled again bozo @charles_leclerc
charles_leclerc: EXCUSE ME I AM NUMBER 1 Y/N FAN ON THE GRID I AM ALLOWED TO BE INSANE ABOUT HAVING YOU IN THE PADDOCK
olliebearman: .... you're the biggest y/n fan on the grid?
charles_leclerc: you of course don't count
yourusername: you know what? sure! i'm just confused at this point
user69: i think this six month breakup rotted all of our brains at this point
user70: charles being a y/n fan makes a lot of sense tbf
user71: at least he didn't do the corny thing of just pretending his gf is a fan
olliebearman: i did say i'm still holding onto the end of the invisible string
yourusername: and if i told you i never let go either
olliebearman: then i know we were always meant to be
yourusername: ugh i love you
olliebearman: i love you more
kimiantonelli: i love you guys too :D
yourusername: 😭 😭 😭 we love you too kimi
olliebearman: we love you kimi :3
fin.
note: my ass finally finished a draft GOOD LORD and a first one for OLLIE !!!!!!!
#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 instagram au#f1 x you#f1#f1 social media au#ollie bearman#ollie bearman x reader#ollie bearman imagine#ollie bearman instagram au#ollie bearman social media au#ollie bearman x you
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╰┈➤ ❝ desire • l.n c.l ❞ xi
part ten - part twelve
➪ Charles hasn't paid much attention to you after your daughter was born but a certain Brit does.
➪ charles finally realizes things between you and lando are in fact serious.
➪ mom!reader x dad!Charles x lando
➪ sorry this took so long :') charles needs professional help <3
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milliexoxo
liked by y/nusername, logansargeant and 5,784 others
milliexoxo okay but my mom speaks italian
tagged: landonorris, y/nusername, carlossainz55
view all 583 comments
norrizz NAH MISS ZOE LECLERC SIT DOWN IM NOT READY FOR YOU TO STAND
↳ yukisan HONESTLY WHATS NEXT WALKING?!
bott_ass HAVE Y'ALL NOT SEEN MILS LATEST VLOG SHE DOES WALK ALREADY
norrizz NAH SEDATE ME IM NOT READY FOR THIS
norry4 Y'ALL FORGOT ITS HER 1ST BIRTHDAY IN LIKE 2 WEEKS?!
landoscar look at mom and dad :(
julieeeexo refuse to believe that's zoë, why is she growing so fast?!
carlandooo carlos and zoë?! 🥺
↳ sharl16 charles punching air rn 😂
charliecharlie aw I'm becoming the biggest y/nlando shipper 😩
logansargeant love the new haircut. 🔥
↳ hamilt44n asjklmsks arianna what are you doing here?!
grussell63 @.y/nusername help your kid out 😭
landonorizzzz pls @.y/nusername adopt logan as well 😭
landofourr wait is this considered a y/nlando hard launch?
↳ chilisainz girl they don't need a hard launch, it's so obvious with everything they do 💀
versainz155 carlos casually hanging out with lando and his little family is what I'm living for <3
➽────────────────────────❥
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y/nusername posted to their story
charles_leclerc replied to your story
charles_leclerc
Where's zoë?
y/nusername
with millie
charles_leclerc
What hotel are you staying in?
y/nusername
we rented a place, zoë is not stuck in a hotel room if that's what you're hinting at, she's able to crawl and walk around all she want.
charles_leclerc
You go on a lot of dates with lando and leave zoë with someone else
y/nusername
you're joking, right?
you're becoming a real asshole, Charles
get a grip
➽────────────────────────❥
y/nusername
liked by landonorris, maxfewtrell and 768,523 others
y/nusername quando in Italia 🧀 🍝 (when in italy)
tagged: landonorris, milliexoxo
view all 1,176 comments
norry4 not the bucket hat, my girl has been hanging around with lando to much 😩
milliexoxo I told y'all my mom speaks Italian
↳ charlesgirlies your 'mom' speaks Italian because her baby daddy is half italian
oscarpastry charles is not half Italian 💀
charlesgirlies girl, he is in spirit lmao
bobnorriz lando and zoë content y'all 🥰
norstappen not really sure if I like the fact zoë is walking but okay..rude :(
el645 when are you going to admit you cheated on charles?
↳ hamilt44n oh god the stalker made its way to insta 💀
yukisan when is charles going to admit he cheated on y/n?
el645 aren't yall curious why they broke up?
charlescharles dude we don't need to know why they broke up? 🤡
landonorris been cooking with my best friend 💜
↳ hamiltonh SHUT UP 😭😭 😭
milliexoxo close to turning a year and still a better cook than you
bott_ass girl you're never going to get along with your stepdad if you keep bullying him like this
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y/nusername
📍 Nice, France
liked by milliexoxo, maxfewtrell and 675,458 others
y/nusername a year ago the tiniest little girl changed my life for the better, happy 1st birthday to our silly little bear ❤️❤️❤️❤️
view all 1,425 comments
bott_ass happy birthday zoë!
maxfewtrell happy 1st birthday to my best friend ❤️
riabish happy birthday pretty girl! 💜💜
logansargeant happy 1st birthday zoë!
↳ hamilt44n I love this, I hope y/n adopted Logan 🥺
milliexoxo my silly little girlfriend, hope you have the happiest of birthdays! <3
carlossainz55 happy birthday to the funniest girl ❤️
norrizz this girlie is so loved 😭 happy b-day little princess! 😍
el645 funny for someone who didn't want a kid in the first place
↳ chilisainz Noelle get your ass out of here
norry4 man's must be blind, this woman LOVES her daughter
lando happy birthday to our little bear 🐻
↳ y/nusername ❤️❤️
landonorris ❤️❤️
yukisan everyday I come on this app and cry :(
charles16 Monaco gp week? Nah, it's been Zoë her week ❤️
➽────────────────────────❥
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y/nusername
liked by milliexoxo, maxfewtrell and 698,452 others
y/nusername the bestest company. <3
tagged: milliexoxo, logansargeant, landonorris, liamlawson30
yukisan Logan had been officially adopted 😭
↳ grussell63 and Liam & his girlfriend?! 😭
lewisham Liam and y/n gave little brother big sister vibes back when Liam took dr3 his seat for a while, I'm not surprised!
norrizz I don't think y'all realize y/n started socialising way more after she left charles, I wonder with who she's hanging out with 👀
landoscar lando and oscar content thank you queen!!!!
norry4 mom and dad with their kids <3
chilisainz wonder where the die hard y/ncharles shippers are right now..
↳ yukisan probably still skipping around in delululand
mcnorris lads, she's still dating charles, lando and y/n are just friends...duh 🤪
yukisan if that's what it's like to have lando as just a friend, can I have him as a friend as well 😭
lawsonbaby LIAM?! CANT WAIT TO SEE THE VLOG
carlando they're insta official 🥺
maxfewtrell cute but where am I?
↳ milliexoxo this post is meant for the cute people..
landonorris and yet you're in it..
milliexoxo 😲
y/nusername contrary to popular beliefs, I'm actually nice and didn't want to turn you into another meme
maxfewtrell I appreciate that, thanks mate ❤️
nortrell MATE?! Best buds these two 😭
➽────────────────────────❥
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Desire taglist; @fangirl-dot-cm @sainzluvrr @writingworlds @chezmardybum @lewisvinga @xjval @fanficweasley @rockyhayzkid @aundercover @thecubanator2 @minchedchilli @crimeshowjunkie @alisoncasey21 @eeviepepi08 @shamelesspotatos @sleepybrokenmelle @leireggsworld @janeholt3 @iamahalicinationn @dessxoxsworld @kapsylia @22yuki @dark-night-sky-99 @sheslikeacurse @nerdreader
Everything taglist; @thomaslefteyebrow @hopefulinlove @smoothopz @softboystarkey @honethatty12 @cixrosie @parkersmjs @ireadthensuetheauthors @celestialams @be-your-coffee-pot @heli991113 @kodzuvk @reality-is-a-con @80sloverry @bibissparkles @myescapefromthislife @lanando4 @elliegrey2803 @ravisinghs-wife @harrysdimple05 @minkyungseokie @pretty-little-bunny382728 @thatgirlthatreadswattpad @severewobblerlightdragon @cherry-piee @namgification @mycenterfold @devineendevers @celestialend
Lando taglist: @beatricemiruna @simp-for-fictional-people @landossainz @christianpulisic10 @bored-brunette2 @i83andrew @mcmuppet @justdreamersdream
#lando norris x reader#lando norris x you#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc x you#lando norris#charles leclerc#lando norris smau#charles leclerc smau#lando norris fanfic#charles leclerc fanfic#f1 x reader#formula one x reader#lando x reader#charles x reader
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some loves
pairing: bang chan x female reader
summary: some loves are too hard to bear. years after being trainees together, chan still thinks of you all the time. he has no idea that a collaboration would lead him back to you.
word count: 6.9k
tags/warnings: reader is an independent singer/songwriter, hurt/comfort, angst, mentions of past injuries, a little bit of jealousy, i am still in denial that chan doesn't do lives anymore, hongjoong from ateez is in this fic
read it on ao3 | masterlist
a/n: once again, sorry for the long time between posts. disclaimer that i do not know much about how the music/idol industry works and i did not really do much research. also i'm not an atiny so sorry if my portrayal of hongjoong is not realistic at all. also also i did a lot of the writing on a new tablet doing handwriting with a stylus to text so please forgive any typos or weird formatting! i didn't have a chance to edit much so i may have missed some things.
Chan’s in his studio when he gets the call. At first, he doesn’t even realise his phone is ringing. It’s 2am on a weekday and he’s been working away for a few hours so the rest of the world has just about faded into the background.
He’s both surprised and intrigued when he looks at the caller ID and sees Hongjoong’s name. Chan would consider Hongjoong to be a friend, but they’re not particularly close and he can’t think of a reason that would warrant this late night call.
“Hey hyung,” Hongjoong greets him briefly before getting straight to the point. “What’s your schedule like in the next few months?”
“It’s actually not too bad,” Chan replies after a moment of thought. “We’re just finalising all the music for the next album so it’ll be a bit of time before we get busy with recording and filming for the comeback. What’s up?”
“You don’t have the answer now and I don’t want you to feel any pressure at all, but would you be interested in doing a collab together?”
“A collab?” Chan repeats. “Like, ATEEZ and Stray Kids?”
“We could,” Hongjoong says reluctantly. “But actually, if you’re up for it then I was thinking more like just you and me. I have a couple tracks that we could work off of and I’ve roped in someone to help me with recording, engineering, and production.”
“Who?” Chan asks, interest piqued.
“Not sure if you’ve heard of them, they go by the name HALLA.”
Chan recognises the name instantly. When Chan had first stumbled upon HALLA one late night scrolling and listening to different independent artists, they seemed relatively unknown. However, a little research revealed that they had KOMCA credits on a number of songs for idol groups, some of which had become widely popular. Their personal work was a variety of genres and a majority of the tracks didn’t have vocals, but the ones that did had clever or thoughtful lyrics. There were a couple of different voices featured in the original songs, both of which were smooth and melodic. HALLA has a style that Chan thinks would complement Stray Kids and he’s considered reaching out to them a few times, but was always held back by something.
There was little about HALLA posted on the internet and while Chan definitely appreciates their privacy, he’s curious to meet the person behind all the songs that he enjoyed. There’s just something familiar about all their music that he can’t quite place, something that he wants more of.
“I’m in,” Chan agrees.
“You can take some time to think about it, talk to JYPE to see what their thoughts are too.”
“No need, I’m interested and I know I can convince management to support this.”
“Well that was easy,” Hongjoong says and Chan can basically hear him grinning through the phone. “And for my own pride, I’m going to pretend that you said yes the second I suggested the collab instead of when I mentioned HALLA-ssi.” Chan instantly flushes and is glad that Hongjoong can’t see him over the phone.
“It wasn’t-” Chan begins to protest.
“It’s okay,” Hongjoong interrupts. “I’m also pretty thrilled to get to work with them, so I understand. Didn’t realise you were familiar with their work, but I guess a hidden gem like them can’t stay hidden for long. I’ll send some files over to you and we can organise a time to work.”
—
Chan finds it easy to work with Hongjoong and they make quick progress on the song, writing lyrics and creating a guide within a couple of weeks. Before he knows it, they’ve scheduled a time for Chan to visit KQ Entertainment to record vocals. Hongjoong knows that Chan is keen to be involved in the production and arrangement of the song too, so they also have a couple sessions booked for that, although Hongjoong teases him relentlessly about just wanting to work with HALLA. The worst part is that Chan can’t even deny it.
Hongjoong meets him at the entrance of KQ Entertainment and quickly takes him through security.
“HALLA-ssi is already in the studio,” Hongjoong explains as they wait for the elevator to arrive. “I was getting input on a track that’s been killing me for the past few days.”
“Did they help?” Chan asks, a little surprised that HALLA is involved in more than just this collaboration. He still hasn't had a chance to connect with them other than quick introductions through text a couple of days ago and he's just as excited to meet them as initially.
“Yeah!” Hongjoong grins, eyes curving into little crescents. “HALLA-ssi is amazing. She only had listen to it a couple times before she came up with suggestions on a few different ways to fix the part that I hated. I left her to finish cleaning the song up and then it’s basically ready for review.”
“How did you start working with HALLA-ssi? I’ve been meaning to try to connect with her.”
“It was actually a friend that suggested working with her. For someone who isn’t signed with a label- which I don’t know how nobody has signed her yet- she’s surprisingly well connected within the industry. I’m sure that KQ would be more than happy to have her work with us, but when I hinted at that, she didn’t seem interested.”
“Really?” Although KQ Entertainment is still one of the smaller companies in the industry, most unsigned artists would still jump at the chance to work there since they have a good reputation, especially due to ATEEZ’s popularity.
“I haven’t poked too much, it’s not really my business. I thought I might as well try. I just know that she’s amazing at her job and I’m grateful that I get to work with her at all.”
They turn the corner to the hallway that leads to the recording studio. The door is ajar and Hongjoong opens it, waving his arm forward to allow Chan to walk through first, before following closely behind.
HALLA’s sitting at the desk and the second Chan sees her face, he stops in his tracks.
“Y/n,” Chan breathes.
You look up, startled, and your eyes connect for a split second before Hongjoong crashes into Chan, sending them both tumbling to the ground.
“Hyung,” Hongjoong complains, unaware of Chan’s inner turmoil. “Why’d you stop?”
Chan lets out an apologetic wheeze from where he’s now trapped under Hongjoong, before resting his forehead against the ground. He needs a second to recover.
It feels like a punch to the gut to see you in front of the recording studio’s computer, fiddling with a track. You look different, but somehow it feels like Chan has been transported right back to his trainee days and all that time that the two of you had spent side by side.
It has been years since Chan last saw you. He had found out that you had left JYPE just months after Stray Kids officially debuted, but all efforts to track you down had been futile. You had changed your number and broken contact with all the other trainees. He had asked around a little bit, but everyone he talked to had been unusually cagey about the subject.
Suddenly, everything makes more sense, especially the little that he knows about HALLA.
As trainees, Chan’s favourite moments had been when you had regaled him with stories of growing up on Jeju Island. The two of you had connected early on through your shared love of the ocean. You had promised him that if he ever went to visit in his free time, you would take him on the best trails up to the Hallasan, the shield volcano, and show him incredible views from the highest point on the island. Occasionally, your parents would send you care packages and the two of you would open them hidden away in one of the vocal practice rooms, the sweet citrus of hallabong exploding in your mouths.
You had always spoken about Jeju Island so fondly, of course you would find a way to indirectly pay homage through the stage name that you chose.
“Oppa,” your voice rings out in the silence of the room. Now, Chan knows why the female voice on some of HALLA’s songs had always seemed hauntingly familiar. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” both Chan and Hongjoong say at the same time, then make eye contact with identical confused expressions.
“Hongjoong-ssi, you didn’t mention that the person you wanted to feature on the track was Channie-oppa,” you say, making it clear who you were addressing your concern to earlier.
“It was supposed to be a surprise!” Hongjoong gets up slowly, dusting off his clothes and scratching at the back of his head, still looking bewildered. “I had no idea that you two knew each other, hyung mentioned he hadn’t worked with you before.”
Chan stays quiet, not sure how much you’re willing to share. Hongjoong must not know about your time with JYPE if he can’t piece together how the two of you could have met.
“Oh- I used to- We trained together back in the day,” you explain sheepishly. “I was with JYPE for a little while and all the trainees knew who Channie-oppa was. That was a long time ago though, I didn’t use the name HALLA back then.”
The five years that you trained at JYPE are more than a little while, but Chan forces himself to bite his tongue at your deliberate understatement. You don’t elaborate further and while it’s obvious that Hongjoong isn’t satisfied with your answer, he’s willing to drop the topic for now. You look relieved when he switches the subject to the song.
The three of you finish recording quickly. It shouldn’t be a surprise, the work so far with Hongjoong has been smooth so adding you to the mix has just made things easier, but Chan knows he’s a perfectionist and it often takes him an almost embarrassing number of takes before he’s satisfied. The only delay comes when Hongjoong decides he wants you to sing some of the backing vocals and resorts to actually getting on his knees and begging. Chan doesn’t go so far, but he can’t help but agree that your voice blends with the song perfectly. Of course, he also just wants to hear you sing.
You relent when Chan quietly voices his agreement and it really shouldn't make Chan feel as smug as it does.
It’s not even early enough for dinner when things are wrapped up. Chan is usually eager to finish a schedule early, but he’s reluctant to leave, taking his time packing up his belongings.
Finally, he doesn’t have a reason to stay any longer so he musters up the courage to ask.
“Do you guys want to go grab some coffee or something to eat?”
You and Hongjoong make eye contact before turning to look at Chan guiltily. His stomach churns for some reason.
“I’m sorry,” you wince. “I actually promised to help Hongjoong-ssi with an ATEEZ song and we need to go over the edits that I made before his meeting with the company later today.”
“Oh,” Chan replies, feeling a little relieved. “Right, no yeah I get it. Hongjoong actually mentioned that earlier, but I forgot. My bad.”
You offer an apologetic smile before turning to the computer, opening up a file.
“I’ll see you guys next time, then,” Chan says, starting to back out of the room.
“Of course! Thank you for your hard work and good job today!” you say brightly. Looking distracted, Hongjoong mumbles an agreement and waves goodbye. Unlike you, he’s not staring at the computer monitor though. Instead, his focus is solely on you. Even from his side profile, Chan can tell that he’s enamoured.
Honestly, Chan can’t really blame him, you look comfortable and confident, swallowed up in an oversized hoodie as you start explaining the alterations that you made to the track. Your voice is calm, but warm and you’re careful to start off by complimenting the work that Hongjoong had done previously.
Chan leaves, resolutely ignoring the twisted feeling that’s back with a vengeance and any thoughts of what the cause might be.
—
Chan can’t sleep. His thoughts are all about you, what you’ve been doing the past few years, what happened to you at JYPE that made you leave, and mostly trying to remember how and why your relationship with him slowly fell apart.
That’s the hardest part. In the darkest time of his life, when Chan had been discouraged and disheartened, you had joined JYPE with a brightness and enthusiasm that gave Chan the motivation to continue being a trainee. He had adored you. He still does.
In those last few months before the survival show had been filmed, Chan’s relationship with you had gone from being everything to nothing. It happened in the blink of an eye, and Chan had never understood what caused you to withdraw so quickly and thoroughly. The two of you had gone from spending almost all of your free time together to you avoiding him at the company, pretending not to hear when he called out your name or tried to get your attention.
The regret of letting you slip away has always eaten away at him, but now more than ever.
Of course, at the time it hadn’t felt so simple. The survival show was Chan’s first serious chance to debut, and not just that, but the weight of having eight other people’s careers depending on his leadership took a toll on all his other relationships. Your absence in his life still hurt, but Chan had lots of practice losing people. He had coped in the way that worked best in the past, throwing himself headlong into producing, training, anything to keep himself from wallowing in his feelings.
Chan doesn’t have any schedules for today, but he still heads to the company. He knows this isn’t the healthiest way to deal with things, but he doesn’t know anything else.
When he arrives, Chan just barely manages to catch a glimpse of a few familiar faces. He calls out before he can think better of it, jogging slightly to catch up. Sana, Momo, and Mina watch curiously as he approaches. He knows that Twice also aren’t in a busy period of the year, so he doesn’t feel guilty delaying them.
“Sorry to bother you all. Sana-noona, I was just wondering if we could chat?”
Sana makes brief eye contact with the rest of the girls before agreeing and waving them to go ahead of her. She follows behind Chan as he leads them into his studio, clearly interested in determining the reason behind this atypical meet up.
“What’s up, Channie?” she asks once the door is closed behind them.
Chan tries to think of the best way to start, not wanting to just outright ask, but not knowing how to subtly steer the conversation into the right direction. Finally, he abandons trying to be casual and just blurts out, “Do you remember Y/n?”
“Of course I do,” Sana says, sounding amused at the sudden mention of you. “You both had reputations for being veteran trainees. I mean, other than Jihyo.”
“I was always surprised that she never debuted,” Chan admits. “I just thought it would happen eventually and I was so shocked to find out that she had left. I didn’t- I don’t understand why she gave up on something she wanted so badly.”
“Give up?” Sana asks, sounding like she’s offended on your behalf. “Why would you say it like that?”
“What do you mean? It was like she was there one day and gone the next, I just assumed that she had enough and quit. Nobody seemed to know anything about it. I never found out why and it’s been kind of killing me.”
“You didn’t hear what happened?”
“What- something happened? To her?” Chan swallows hard, suddenly feeling unwell.
“It- I thought that you of all people would know-”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing, but- you never talked to her about it? You knew her better than any of us.”
“Noona, I didn’t know that she was gone until months later. She obviously didn’t want to talk about it to me, I never reached out at first. When I finally did, her number had been changed. What was I supposed to do?”
“I- It’s better if you were to hear it from her. I don’t know the full story and you know how things can be distorted through gossip. And you especially must know how dangerous that can be.”
“What are you talking about?”
“You really have no clue? The two of you were inseparable…”
“Please,” Chan pleads.
“You know how it is in the industry, you were so close, of course there were rumours…”
It suddenly clicks.
“But we were just friends! And the dating ban-”
“Chan, you know nobody actually sticks to those, right?”
“But really, we were never-”
“I believe you,” Sana says, carefully. “But you know that to management that it doesn’t really matter whether or not anything was actually going on. To them it’s all about the optics. A perceived relationship is just as dangerous as an actual one.”
“Management…” Chan repeats, his mind racing. “They never mentioned anything to me though.”
“You never found it suspicious? You two are extremely close and out of the blue she suddenly stops talking to you, then right after the two of you stop hanging out, you’re chosen for the survival show? Someone must have talked to her at some point. Maybe not management, but for sure someone.”
“You think that’s why it took so long for me to debut?” Chan asks, even though he already knows the answer.
“It was a liability,” Sana explains. “To have a dating scandal so early on? Neither of your careers would survive. It’s painful and a terrible part of the industry but it’s true.”
“And.. Why she left, you know about that too?” Chan pleads.
“I think I’ve said too much already. I know that it’s hard, but some things are really personal.” She pauses for a moment. “What brought this on, anyway? You haven’t mentioned Y/nnie in years.”
“I can’t say much, but I- I saw her today, got to talk to her, found out what she’s been up to.” Sana gasps. Chan continues. “It was so weird to see her after so long. In the back of my mind, I had always wondered, but…”
“I’m glad that you two got to reconnect,” Sana says gently. “The two of you cared about each other a lot, that much was obvious. Talk to her, I think at the very least you’ll be able to find peace about what happened.”
“Noona-” Chan reaches out and pulls Sana into a tight hug. “Thank you for telling me. I appreciate it.”
“Of course. I’m sorry that it took so long for you to find out.”
—
A few days later, Hongjoong schedules another session to work on the song. Leading up to it, Chan is both looking forward to it and nervous, not sure what to expect. Although he still really wants to know what happened to you all those years ago, he’s scared about what he might learn and any part he might have had in it.
After a sleepless night, he ends up arriving almost 15 minutes early. This time, Hongjoong isn’t waiting at the building’s entrance. Instead he had let him know a few days before that Chan could just sign himself in and had sent him the name and location of the studio that was booked. When Chan reaches it, he can make out conversation from inside.
“HALLA,” Hongjoong can be heard through the studio doors, which aren’t fully shut. His tone is petulant and much more casual than it was previously. Chan wonders how much time the two of you have spent together between then and now and he almost misses the next thing that Hongjoong says. “You never told me that you were a trainee before.”
That stops Chan in his tracks, interested in how you’ll respond.
“It was a long time ago.” Your voice is faint. You’re still nice, but Chan can tell that your voice is stiffer than usual. “It doesn’t really matter now.”
This time, Hongjoong doesn’t let it go.
“What happened?” he prods.
“Just drop it,” you warn him. “It’s the past, forget I told you in the first place. Nothing ever came of it anyway.”
“Y/n-” Hongjoong changes tactics, the nagging tone replaced with a quieter, more serious one. You sigh.
“It didn’t work out. Obviously. I’m just not idol material.”
“Oh come on, I don’t believe that for a second. Your producing is good enough that I know for sure you’ve been getting offers to work with more companies than just KQ. When you direct during recording, you can hit every note without any warm up or practice. And I’ve heard your original songs, you must have been considered for both the position of lead rapper and lead singer as a trainee because there’s no way that anybody would let your talent go to waste.” Hongjoong is breathing hard by the end of his rant and Chan can see that this is something that has been bothering him for a while.
“It’s okay, Hongjoong-oppa.” Your voice is gentle, like you’re trying to comfort him. “I’m happy with what I have right now. Really. I’m grateful for all the freedom I have. Getting to work on any project I want and experiment with my music without having to deal with the bureaucracy and politics of the industry? Having that independence is precious to me. I wanted to be an idol for a long long time. But even though that specific plan I had didn’t work out, it doesn’t mean I’m not happy with what I’m doing.”
Hongjoong stays quiet for a while.
“Do you think that if you had the opportunity to debut as an idol now, you would?” he finally asks.
“Oppa, it’s not possible. I can’t dance, I’m too old-” you protest.
“No no, just hypothetically. Like if someone walked into the room and handed you a contract and said that if you signed it in an hour then you’d be able to debut.”
“I- I don’t know.”
“What’s your gut feeling?”
“I think I left that dream behind, I don’t know if I want to go down that path again. I don’t think I have it in me.”
“I’m sorry,” Hongjoong says after another pause. “I shouldn’t have questioned you so much, you shouldn’t have to justify your decisions to me.”
“No, it’s fine. It seems strange, right? For me to be an artist in Seoul and not want to get signed, it's only natural for you to be curious. But I learned a lot when I was a trainee and I learned even more after that and I can say with certainty that this is what I want.”
Chan takes that opportunity to knock on the studio door and push it open.
“Hey, hope I’m not interrupting,” he says, as if he wasn’t just eavesdropping on their conversation and purposely chose when to cut in. “Sorry, I’m a little bit late.”
“Hey, no problem man,” Hongjoong says. “We haven’t had a chance to do anything yet, so you’re right on time.”
“Good to see you,” you chime in. “I think this should be pretty quick so let’s get started!”
As you predicted, it doesn’t take long before a majority of the song is finished. Normally, Chan would be keen to stay involved until the very last detail is finalised, but he trusts you and at the end of this day, it’s Hongjoong’s song so he’s happy to give him the final say.
At the end of the session, Chan once again uses the opportunity to try to catch you alone. The two of you are side by side, packing your bags and Chan asks if you have any plans for the rest of the day. You confirm that you're available and Chan is about to suggest that the two of you take the time to catch up when Hongjoong interrupts.
“Oh, Y/n-ah,” he says. “I was actually hoping to get your input on something and I didn’t have a chance to ask you earlier. Can you please stick around for a bit? Sorry, hyung.”
Hongjoong sounds so sincere that Chan almost doesn’t feel annoyed that he’s stealing all of your time and attention. Almost, because at the end of the day, Chan’s only human. Even though he knows he has no right to feel possessive over you, he can’t stop the petty jealousy that bubbles up inside of him. At this point, there’s no denying the emotion.
Just like the previous session, he leaves alone, heading directly to the studio. Hours later, his breath catches when he checks his phone and sees that you’ve texted him.
[Received - 8:04pm]
Channie-oppa~
[Received - 8:04pm]
This is Y/nnie
[Received - 8:05pm]
Sorry about earlier, I have a contract with KQ Entertainment and work comes first :/
[Received - 8:09pm]
But I’m free now! You still interested in catching up?
Chan stares at the messages until it feels like they’re burned into his retinas. Logically, he knew that you had his number, the two of you were in a group chat that Hongjoong had set up, but this was your first time messaging him privately. The first time you had reached out in years. A precious opportunity that he never thought that he would have. He doesn’t want to mess this up.
He’s also shocked to see you texting so casually. Although the two of you have been comfortable in person, he wasn’t sure that it would translate to one-on-one conversation.
[Sent - 8:10pm]
Hey Y/n!
[Sent - 8:11pm]
No worries at all, I understand. I’m the same way too
[Sent - 8:13pm]
I still wanna meet up… but I’m all the way back in Gangdong-gu 😅 It’d be a bit of a trek for you if you're still at KQ
[Received - 8:13pm]
Gangdong-gu?
[Received - 8:14pm]
Ohh JYPE
[Received - 8:14pm]
My bad, forgot that you guys moved
[Sent - 8:15pm]
Yeahhh
[Sent - 8:15pm]
Headed straight back to the company after we were done, sorry
[Received - 8:18pm]
Well… If you’re willing to wait then I don’t mind. KQ is close to a metro station anyway
[Sent - 8:18pm]
Wait, really?
[Sent - 8:18pm]
No no no, don’t take the subway
[Sent - 8:18pm]
I’ll send a driver. They’re gonna pick you up in 20 min
[Received - 8:19pm]
Wowow
[Received - 8:19pm]
Private driver?
[Received - 8:20pm]
You’re a real superstar now haha
[Sent - 8:21pm]
alsfjshkafs noooooooo
[Sent - 8:21pm]
It’s just faster
[Sent - 8:21pm]
and safer
[Received - 8:22pm]
I’m not complaining
[Received - 8:22pm]
but I’m going to get your autograph when I see you
[Received - 8:23pm]
If I sell it then I can probably afford my own private driver 🤭
[Sent - 8:24pm]
Knew it
[Sent - 8:25pm]
You’re just using me for my fame
[Received - 8:26pm]
Ah you got me this time
[Received - 8:26pm]
*Your fame, your talent, and your good looks
[Received - 8:27pm]
Even tho you were the one that said you wanted to meet up
[Received - 8:27pm]
Hmmm maybe you’re the one using me?
Chan listens to his phone as it continues to vibrate from where it’s lodged in between two of the couch cushions after he threw it across to the opposite side of the room. His face is buried in his hands and flaming red. He feels both giddy and terribly embarrassed.
Chan’s no stranger to flirting, he’s experienced his fair share being on either side through interactions with the members and with Stay, but he forgot how flustered he was being on the receiving end of your teasing. The part he never understood is that your playful tone always gave way to sincerity. Even when the two of you would joke around, he could always tell that you meant every comment that you made about Chan being talented or attractive and that flattered him almost as much as it baffled him.
[Received - 8:32pm]
?? Speechless that I caught on?
[Received - 8:36pm]
I think your driver has arrived… Otherwise I’m being kidnapped
[Received - 8:40pm]
Don’t think I would survive a horror film… I got into the car with no questions asked
[Received - 8:42pm]
It was nice knowing you I guess
When he realises how much time has passed, Chan grabs his phone and runs down to the back entrance of the company. Luckily you haven’t arrived yet and he takes the time to reply to your messages.
[Sent - 8:53pm]
Sorry, lost track of time
[Sent - 8:53pm]
They’ll drop you off at the back door, I’ll meet you there so you don’t have to get signed in or anything
[Received - 8:54pm]
Don’t think you’re getting away with ignoring my other texts
[Received - 8:55pm]
But thanks
[Received - 8:55pm]
Is this back door, the famous one that only allows in authorised people?
[Received - 8:55pm]
I’m honoured
Chan rolls his eyes at your cheesy reference and is in the middle of typing up a response when he sees the car pull up. You step out cautiously, then brighten when you see where Chan’s propping up the door.
“Hey,” Chan greets you. “Glad that you made it safely.”
“Thanks for the ride,” you say, looking around curiously as Chan leads you to an elevator that takes you to the rest of the building. “So this is the new and improved JYP Entertainment. I’d say that it looks the same as before, but I never got the chance to come in.”
“Yeah,” Chan says, rubbing a hand against the back of his neck as he walks. “I mean it’s pretty nice, but at the end of the day a practice room is a practice room and that’s where we spend most of our time.”
“Hmm I think we might have to agree to disagree on that one. You have your own studio don’t you?”
“Ah, kind of. It’s technically a shared one, but practically I’m the only one that uses it unless we’re out of the country for a long time,” Chan confirms.
“Seems a lot better than what we used to have! Do you remember when we used to cram ourselves into that tiny room that barely even fit two chairs and a table?”
“I almost forgot about that, it was so terrible! In the summer it would get so hot that we’d keep the door open-”
“And then someone would come yell at us because we’d be playing music too loud-”
“I remember begging management to install a portable air conditioner on multiple occasions, but they always refused.”
“Of course! Even if they weren’t so stingy, there weren’t any windows leading outside in there, how could they install it?”
“Is that why? I always thought they just wanted us to suffer.”
“That too,” you giggle for a moment, before your smile fades. “But they weren’t totally unreasonable. Management has a different perspective than us, sometimes they know better than us because of their understanding of the industry. They can see things that we don’t.”
It’s clear that you’re no longer talking about air conditioning anymore. A lump seems to have formed in Chan’s throat when he recalls his conversation with Sana. Luckily, the two of you have just arrived and Chan forces himself to smile.
“We’re here,” he says, opening the door and motioning for you to enter ahead of him. “Welcome to Channie’s Room!”
“It’s cute!” you say as you step in. “Very… neat. It’s actually more spacious than it looks.”
“Oh,” Chan says, faltering in his steps for a second. “You- you’ve seen my studio?”
“In case you didn’t realise, you go live every week from said studio. I think at this point everyone in the K-pop industry and every K-pop fan has seen it,” you tease.
“Right, yeah. I didn’t- I wasn’t sure how much you kept up with that kind of stuff,” Chan stammers.
“K-pop or do you mean specifically Stray Kids?” you ask, tilting your head slightly.
“Either I guess," Chan shrugs.
"I will admit that it took me a while to get back into it," you say slowly. "I wasn't... in the best mindset after I left." Chan stays quiet, sensing that you're not quite finished. "I know that I disappeared and I am sorry for not reaching out. I wanted to, but I also didn't know how. I know that I hurt you. That it was cruel to avoid you, not reply to your messages, ignore your calls. I had my reasons why, but it doesn't excuse the pain that I caused, and I'm sorry for that too."
“I think,” Chan swallows hard. “I think that the most difficult part was that for the longest time, I didn’t know why. I didn’t know what I did wrong. I asked Sana about it finally, after I saw you again. And I just felt so stupid to realise that it was obvious to everyone except me."
“I’m sorry,” you say again. “I wanted to tell you, of course I wanted to. But I also knew you. If I had told you that us being together was preventing your debut-”
“I wouldn’t have cared,” Chan finishes your sentence for you, starting to understand. “I would have done anything to keep you by my side.”
"Even if it meant throwing away your career," you say softly. "I couldn't let you do that to yourself. You worked so hard, how could I live with being the reason that you were stuck in the training rooms? You belong on stage, making music.”
"The part that I still don’t get though is why you left? You should have been able to debut as well, I know it."
“Ah,” you say wistfully. You look around and grab onto the pillow that’s on the couch beside you, fidgeting with it as you figure out what to say next. “You know, I actually was supposed to debut.”
“What? How come I never heard about it?” Chan feels a pang in his chest. All these years ago, the two of you had promised that the other would be the first person that they would tell if they ever found out that they had the chance to debut. It seemed that neither of them had kept their promise.
“It was supposed to be a secret project. JYP wanted to see how successful a surprise debut announcement would be. You should have seen the NDAs that they made us sign.” You shake your head, letting out a huff of air. “It turned out to be a good decision because it meant they could cancel it without anyone knowing that we existed in the first place.”
"Who was in the group?" Chan asks.
"There were five of us. I think you know all of them, Sumin, Ryujin, Sojin, and Hyowon," you list. You're right, Chan is either familiar with or has heard of all the girls that you mention. It doesn't make sense though, the group was filled with talented individuals and Chan can't think of any reason strong enough to lead to disbandment. Even more baffling is that of the five of you, only Ryujin ended up staying at the company long enough to join the lineup for another group.
"And they just cancelled it out of nowhere?"
“No... It was- I know that for any idol, preparing for debut is tough, but I think that in some ways, it’s especially brutal for the girl groups," you say instead. Chan doesn't question you further, knowing that you must have a point that you're trying to make.
“How so?” Chan has an idea, he’s seen what the female trainees went through, the differences in how they were evaluated and criticised. But he wants to hear it from you, wants to understand what you’ve been through.
“The visual aspect feels like it’s more heavily emphasised than our talent or skills. We were measured for our music video outfits the second they finalised the concept. It was really early on, but at the time I thought it was so exciting and fun that I didn’t question it. I think that all of us were so thrilled by the thought of debuting that we didn't think anything of it. We did our final fittings for it a few weeks before filming and they had made them all a size too small, everything was just a little bit too tight. They didn’t outright say it, but it was implied that they weren’t going to alter them. It was a choice to lose weight or our chance to debut was gone. We were devastated and angry and eventually just resigned. If that's what it took then I would do it. We dieted like crazy for the time leading up to filming,” you laugh, but it's in disbelief, the sound is hollow.
Paired with what you’re saying, it makes Chan want to burn the whole world down. He doesn't say anything, not sure if he can even open his mouth without letting his rage escape, something that you don't deserve.
“We were practising, like always," you continue. "There was a tricky step that needed to be fixed by the next day when we’d be recording, a flip that we hadn't quite mastered. I was the smallest one on the team, so I was the one being flipped. It must have been like 3 or 4 in the morning, we were all tired, hungry, and nervous about filming. Honestly, I don't quite remember what happened, it was all a blur. There was just this feeling that something went wrong and then pain."
You roll up the pants on your left leg and show off the skin there. Chan has to hold back a gasp at the sight. Even though it’s long healed, the scarring is extensive and obvious. Chan can't imagine how much it must have hurt.
“I broke my ankle in two places and sprained my wrist. I couldn't believe it, five years of my life just gone in an instant. It took months before I could walk and even longer before I could dance again. Even now, I can't dance anywhere close to the way that I used to," you say with a watery smile. “Sojinnie had a concussion from the fall and Suminnie dislocated her shoulder, I must have knocked into them or fallen onto them or something. What could we do? Three out of the five of us were out of commission, there was no time and no budget for a group that hadn’t even debuted to find replacements or re-record and re-film everything. I woke up after surgery and they told me that they were sorry, but my contract with the company was over. That someone had helped me pack up all my things in the dorm. I went back to Jeju-do as soon as I was released from the hospital.”
"I- I'm sorry that I didn't know," Chan says, clearing his throat roughly when his voice breaks partway through the sentence. " I wish that I could have been there, to help or comfort you. I should have-"
"Oppa," you respond gently. "It's okay. I didn't tell anybody what happened and the company also kept things quiet. I'm glad you didn't find out at the time. You had other, more important things to focus on, I didn't want to distract you from that."
"You're not a distraction," Chan says incredulously. "You're important to me, I would have dropped everything to be with you in such a difficult time."
"And that's exactly why I couldn't tell you. You've always been too good to me, Channie-oppa," you sniffle. "Look at you now! I'm so always proud when I think of how far you've come."
Chan lifts a trembling hand and carefully cups your face, using his thumb to wipe away a tear that has started making its way down your cheek. He hears your breathing hitch, but you don't object to his touch. If anything, you melt into it.
Chan takes the opportunity to wrap his arms around you, bringing you close. The gesture breaks the dam of tears that you must have been holding back. Chan rocks the two of you back and forth gently, just letting you cry and trying to surreptitiously wipe away his own tears. It takes a few minutes before you calm, taking huge shuddering breaths that break Chan's heart almost as much as your sobs had.
"I'm sorry," you say with a voice thick with emotion.
"Hey, no," Chan reassures you. "There's no need to apologise. Are you feeling better now?"
You nod slowly, head still pressed against Chan's chest.
"I think- I think I just missed you. I always thought it would get easier, not having you in my life, but it never did."
At your words, Chan can't help his arms from tightening, squeezing you close.
"I finally found you again," he says. "And this time, I promise that I won't ever let you go."
read it on ao3 | masterlist
#some loves#chahnniesroom#skz fanfic#skz angst#skz fic#skz x reader#skz x female reader#skz x y/n#stray kids angst#stray kids x female reader#stray kids x y/n#stray kids x you#stray kids fluff#stray kids fanfic#stray kids x reader#bang chan angst#bang chan x reader#bang chan fluff#chan x reader#chan angst#chan fic#bang chan x y/n#bang chan x you#chan x you#chan x y/n#chan x female reader#skz imagines#stray kids#chan#bang chan
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You're reading what? (Ghost x reader x 141)
Summary: Soap finds out you're reading porn in your free time. Ghost decides to ask you about it.
Note: Barracks bunny, barracks bunny, barracks bunny! Sorry, reader's a slut. (affectionate) / I'll probably write more parts, maybe smut, maybe suggestive stuff, maybe fluff... I don't know yet. Check the #barracks bunny fics tag for more. / If you want to know when I post new stuff, follow @unreliablesnakefics and hit the get notifications button.
It was Soap who found out what you were reading in your limited free time during missions. You left your Kindle on the table while you went to the bathroom, and he wanted to see what book you were so invested in lately. When he read the first two paragraphs, his jaw dropped and a wide grin crept on his face.
"Hey, LT, you won't believe what she's reading," he said while he checked the title of the book just to know what to check later.
Ghost rolled his eyes, completely uninterested at the moment. He was busy writing a report that was due by the end of the day, and he had promised Price that he would do it on time. So he didn't have time to think about what stupid novel you were currently reading.
But Soap didn't give up. He put the device back where it was before, then took the chair next to the lieutenant. "It's porn. I'm not joking, she's reading porn," he said excitedly, keeping his voice down as he spoke.
With mixture of disapproval and interest in his eyes, he turned to the sergeant and asked, "And?"
"What do you mean? She's reading porn. No wonder she dodges every question regarding the books she's reading all the time," he replied before he typed something into his phone. "Here, this is the one she's currently reading."
Ghost took the device from him and tapped on the first search result. He read the summary, then moved on to some quotes the users highlighted. It was interesting to say the least. Were you really into this type of stuff?
When they heard your voice from the hallway, Soap took back his phone and closed the browser before you entered the room again. To you it probably seemed like they were talking about the mission and the report Ghost was writing, and this is why the lieutenant felt a little bad for this invasion of your privacy.
After being on this mission for so long, he was obviously frustrated. He couldn't just go to a bar to pick up someone, and his hand was less and less satisfying these days. His mind recently began to travel back to you and your book, and one afternoon, when he had some unexpected free time, he found himself buying and downloading that novel on his phone.
He got quite far in a matter of hours, and he couldn't help himself when he found you alone in a room after dinner. Ghost sat down across from you and took the Kindle from your hands to take a look at it. "Still reading porn?" he asked teasingly.
You gulped, your cheeks probably burning from the embarrassment you clearly felt. "H–How do you know about that?" you asked him after a few seconds of awkward silence.
"Soap stole this the other day," he replied as he gave back the device. "Don't worry, I think I'm the only one he told about this. Your secret's safe with me."
"I don't even want to know what you think about me now," you said with your head buried in your hands.
Ghost let out a dry laugh as he peeled your hands off your face. "Hey, it's okay. We spend way too much time here, I think it's safe to say we all need our fix one way or another," he assured you while holding your hand, his fingers absentmindedly drawing circles into your skin.
Maybe he was flirting with you. The more he thought about you and what he had read in that novel, the more he wished he could do that in real life with you. He had always liked you; the disciplined, tough, but also kind soldier that got along with everyone on the team.
And the one Price played favorites with, he reminded himself. They all had their suspicions about the captain's motivation, believing he himself had a crush on you from the start. After all, why else would he bring you small gifts every time you met again? Why would he spend hours talking to you alone?
Sometimes Ghost wondered if there was anything between the two of you. Were you off-limits? Or was it a one-sided thing?
"And what do you do to get your fix?"
Your question brought him back to reality and he instinctively let go of your hand. He couldn't say that he jerked off to the thought of you. No, that would be way too creepy. So he shrugged, hoping this was enough to answer your question.
After a short pause, Ghost folded his hands on the table and leaned a little closer to you. "Have you ever tried anything that you read in your little books?" he asked you with a grin under the mask.
With your head tilted to the side, you watched him in silence for a while as you thought about your answer. "Do you even know what's in them exactly?"
"I began to read one of them. The one that reminded me of the Fifty Shades of Grey stories, only in a hardcore version," he replied casually.
An amused hum left your lips. "How do you even know what those stories are about? You don't seem to be the type who's into them."
Of course, Ghost had an answer to that. "I had an ex who made me watch the whole series. I didn't like it. Back to my question, have you tried anything from that book for example?"
"I have," you replied immediately, shamelessly grinning as you watched him.
It was hard to surprise Ghost these days, but hearing you answering so honestly definitely took him off guard. "The whole power play thing?" You nodded without hesitation as you took a sip of your soda. "With who?"
"Does it matter?"
"No, it doesn't," he admitted, knowing full well he probably wouldn't know that person anyway.
The pair of you sat there in silence for a while, your eyes locking every now and then before you flashed a smile at him then dived back into your book. He didn't mind, instead of complaining he just leaned back in the chair and watched you.
Ghost hated feeling this way, he hated that he could do nothing but wish for a cold shower in your presence. If he stood up now, you would surely notice how excited he was to be near you. He wanted to play with you too, he wanted to find out what you had learned from those books of yours.
Gaz walked into the room with a stupid smile on his face then put his hands on your shoulders as he leaned closer. "Price wants to see you," he announced before suddenly taking the ebook reader from you and taking a look at the page you were at. "Ooooh, another one? Do you even read anything else?"
Biting on your lower lip, you exhaled through your nose angrily. "I'm gonna kill Soap. I swear to God I'm gonna shoot him before we go home," you told them before snatching your Kindle from Gaz's hands and heading towards the door.
But on the way there you stopped behind Ghost and leaned down to his ear. He could feel your hot breath on his skin which made his cock twitch in his pants. Fuck, what were you doing to him?
"By the way, if you want to know more about what I want to try from those books, just say it. I'm sure we could arrange that," you added as your hand squeezed his shoulder.
Before he could say anything, you left the room, leaving him alone with Gaz. "Oh, you haven't figured it out yet," the sergeant said with a laugh.
"Figured out what?" Ghost asked, completely dumbfounded.
But Gaz only shrugged. "She's fun to be around. That's all I'm saying."
And with that, he left too. The lieutenant had absolutely no idea what to think. There were you, probably suggesting sleeping with him one day, and there was Gaz with his mysterious comment about you. As he let out a groan, he let his forehead hit the table with a loud thud. Why couldn't things be simple?
#call of duty#modern warfare#simon ghost riley#simon riley#ghost#simon riley x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost x reader#mw2#john mactavish#soap#john soap mactavish#kyle gaz garrick#kyle garrick#gaz#barracks bunny fics
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hii! could i request something w spence where he asks uni reader to move in with him and r is kinda nervous about it please🙏🙏 love all of ur fics, and thanksss 🫶🫶🫶
yass this is super cute!!!! thank you for the request, hope i did it justice
warnings/tags: fluff!! a teensy bit suggestive at the end if u squint... i cant help myself. i'm an animal
requests are open! sfw and nsfw welcome
(a/n: this is probably an awkward spot to put this but I didn't wanna make a whole other post: THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL THE LOVE AND SUPPORT!!! i have gained over 100 followers since i last posted and have over 1k notes on both of my recent works thats literally bonkers insane crazy town ACTUALLY. i love hearing your thoughts and reactions to my work even if its just a silly little comment. so yeah. thanks and so much love to u ALL)
“So basically, I’m not allowed in the dorm except to sleep because she always has her boyfriend over, and I told her that’s literally insane—I’m paying thousands of dollars to be there just like her. If she wanted privacy she should have gotten a single. She can’t just lock me out of our shared bedroom all the time! I live there!”
You’re stabbing violently at your food by the time you finish your verbal tirade.
“Okay, maybe put the knife down before you hurt yourself,” Spencer suggests, readying a hand to take the implement away from you if necessary. The knife clatters against your plate as you drop it.
“She’s driving me fucking crazy,” you mumble, rubbing your eyes until you see fireworks. “And the housing department said I don’t have grounds to transfer rooms, so I’m stuck with her for the rest of the year.”
There’s no reply from your boyfriend, and a pang of guilt in your chest makes you look up at him again. His expression, as so often is the case, is inscrutable.
“I’m sorry for ranting. I’m really happy to see you and I don’t mean to ruin dinner, I just—”
“You could stay with me,” he interrupts.
You blink.
“Like... when she locks me out?”
Spencer laughs self-consciously.
“No, like... permanently.”
For a moment you just gape at him like an idiot, trying to comprehend his offer.
He wants you to move in... with him. Permanently. He wants to live with you.
You realize you’ve been staring at him for far too long, and you lean back, inhaling deeply as the world launches into motion again.
“That’s... a big step, Spence,” you breathe. His eyes scan you head to toe, and you realize he’s most definitely analyzing your body language.
“You don’t have to say yes. It was just an offer,” he shrugs, standing up and clearing the plates from the table.
“Wait,” you call, following him to the kitchen. “Are you upset now because I leaned away from you when you asked?”
He turns from the counter, looking at you blankly.
“Of course not. That would be ridiculous.”
Oh, he totally is.
You tentatively step forward, gently lacing your fingers through his—but unable to meet his eyes.
“It’s not that I don’t want to,” you begin gingerly, “but I’m... I’m not done with school. We always said I would move in once I graduated.”
“That’s an arbitrary limitation we set for ourselves. There are plenty of ways to get you from here to campus every day.”
“But you’re not even here sometimes. I would just be alone.”
“You would have the whole apartment to yourself. You would have my bed. You wouldn’t have to share a shower with an entire floor of college students anymore. And ultimately, we would get to spend a lot more time together.”
You try to speak but find your throat is tight. Spending more time together is exactly what you’re afraid of.
“What’s your real objection here?” he asks quietly, running his thumb back and forth over the underside of your wrist. You swallow, watching the motion of his hand.
“I’m afraid, that if we move in together... you’ll stop liking me.” The words come out paper thin, barely audible.
And he laughs. Your teary eyes dart up, surprised by the reaction—slightly hurt, even.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart, I’m not laughing at you,” Spencer says, sobering up when he sees your baleful expression. “I just can’t believe you think I’d stop liking you.” He wipes away the tears beading on your eyelashes delicately. “I’m in love with you. Neurologically that is pretty hard to undo.”
You study his face, looking for any sign of hesitation or dishonesty. All you find is pure fondness in the curve of his lips; utter devotion in the soft set of his eyes.
“You promise you won’t start hating me as soon as I move in?”
“I promise.”
You lean against his chest, craning your neck to look up at him.
“I can be pretty annoying.”
“I think I can handle it.”
“I take really long showers.”
He kisses you softly. “Me too. I’m sure we can figure out a way to conserve water.”
Despite your reservations you smile against his lips.
“Okay?” he asks.
“Okay.”
#criminal minds#spencer reid#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid fic#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x self insert#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x you
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Sleeping Beauty; Yacht
2023 formula one grid & female!driver!reader
Summary - The story behind the Sleeping Beauty yacht post
Warning - Nothing
Sleeping Beauty
-
"Hey, anyone else need a drink?" Charles asked the drivers sat around the table. He had invited some of the grid to hang out on his yacht during summer break. A few asked for another drink, craving the cold alcohol drink.
Walking into the yachts kitchen, Charles failed to notice the sleeping girl on his couch. Having failed to see Y/n asleep, he continued to make the drinks for the rest of the drivers.
-
It wasn't long after Charles returned with the drinks that they noticed the youngest absence. "Hey wheres the kiddo?" Carlos piped up, finally noticing the quiet atmosphere. At Carlos' question, the rest of the drivers looked around. Now only noticing that she was gone.
"How much do you want to bet that she is sleep somewhere?" Lando had the cheeky tone ligering in his voice as he turned to Oscar who had a smirk identical to his own.
"Nah she probably off already swimming back to shore. It wasn't long before she would get bored of us" The two laughed as they all got up to find Y/n.
Walking through to the kitchen was when they all fell into a collective laughter. She was laid on the couch clutching her phone in her left hand whilst her pair of sunglasses laid lazily across her eyes.
Their loud laughter and amusement had started to stir Y/n out of her sleep. She looked around confused of the sudden laughter. "Good morning kiddo, were we beginning to get boring?"
Despite her awoken and confused state, she still managed to reply to Pierre in her classic iconic tone. "Yeah I though I would be better in here then with a bunch of weird drivers" Every driver had amused smiles on their faces.
"We thought you swam back to shore" Oscar piped up from his place near the kitchen sink. Gesturing to himself and Lando.
"Yeah well I thought that it was too much effort in my opinion, decided this would better" Rubbing her eyes, she laid her head onto Daniels shoulder once he sat down next to her.
Looking down at his watch, Mick suggested to the rest of the group that they return to shore so that Y/n could retire for the night. Once everyone agreed, Charles started to turn his yacht back to the port where they would depart and retire to their individual home for the night.
"Goodnight Y/n!" Max waved to the young driver as she made her way home, to which he got a weak yet loving wave in return.
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charles_leclerc
F1 get together got to boring for her apparently
Tagged: yourusername
Liked by carlossainz55 and 679,467 others
landonorris I won the bet!! Pay up Mr Oscar Piastri 😌
= oscarpiastri Dammit!
= username Them making bets on her sleep is the best thing I've seen all day!!
yourusername In my defence, it was really boring lol
= charles_leclerc Wait sorry don't blame, you went out the night before
danielricciardo Apparently she didn't want to go swimming with us
= maxverstappen1 Apparently so
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#charles leclerc#formula one#lando norris#lando norris x reader#max verstappen#daniel ricciardo#charles leclerc x reader#formula one x reader#max verstappen x reader#carlos sainz#mick schumacher#oscar piastri#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#carlos sainz x reader#oscar piastri x reader#alex albon#sebastian vettel
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I'll wait for you.
Sana x fem!reader
synopsis: You and Sana have an on/off relationship. You broke up again two weeks ago. Then you begin to talk at a school event again.
w/c: 2.4k
warnings: angst; hopeless romantic; no happy endings here; on/off relationship; more angst; complicated relationship; even more complicated feelings; smoking
a/n: i am trying something new here. i have never written or posted anything before, so bare with me if you decide to check this out. i just felt like trying something here. btw i love sana and i apologize if she seems like the "bad guy" in this fic. :) DMs and asks open to suggestions and feedback.
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You're currently back home, sitting on the roof of this shitty old house. It's been over an hour and the sun is starting to set. However, you can't seem to find the motivation to go back inside. You've been looking back at these past months. Lighting up a cigarette and inhaling a lung full of smoke as you try to figure out where it all went wrong. You're afraid you already know the answer, but one can fake obliviousness.
-- Flashback --
It's been weeks since you were last on good terms. If only you can explain or express how deeply that crushes your heart.
Thursday was open mic night for school. You had finished classes early that day and rushed out of your part-time at the restaurant.
Sana was there along with your friends. You rushed into the cafe, where the open mic was being held. It was crowded.
Anxiety began to rise and take over your body, heart hammering against your chest.
Whether it was from the thought of performing in front of everyone or the thought of seeing Sana, you had no clue.
You had entered through the side entrance. Automatically you searched for her face, wondering if she really did decide to come see you perform.
Sana: of course I'm gonna go!
Y/N: really? you don't have to
Sana: yes i do!
Y/N: ...ok then
Sana: will you be happy if i go? i mean... do you want me to?
Y/N: ...yea i want you there
Sana: ...
Y/N: ...
Sana: i'm sorry y/n...it's ok if you don't want me to go
Sana: i know things have been weir-
Y/N: please come sana
Y/N: really, i mean it
Sana: oh...ok!
Y/N: ok
As you moved through the crowd you saw the face you've longed for. The person you had been missing. Sana.
She wasn't alone. She was walking next to Momo. The both of them had classes all day so they still had their book bags on them. Their backs were facing you as you approached them. You had an idea.
You walked up to the two girls, making sure to go unnoticed. Then you suddenly yanked on their backpacks lightly while yelling, "I can't do this." Blabbering whatever came to mind first.
Both girls turned around with a scare, Momo screaming loudly of course.
After the initial shock wore off. Sana replied, "What happened?" meanwhile Momo was hitting your shoulder cursing at you.
"I can't do this. I don't think I can go up there."
Despite the punches you were receiving from Momo you were solely focused on Sana. Your gazes met and locked. Sana reached out for your hand to calm your anxiety. Old habits. But you weren't opposed and you didn't feel like pulling back either.
It had been a few days since you both last spoke. Two weeks since you broke up. You would pass each other at school, sharing some of the same classes. But things were a bit different. Post breakup. You texted every once in a while trying to remain friends. Trying to remain in each other's lives. It wasn't the same.
Even though you had broken up, your presence wasn't unwelcomed by Sana. The two of you remained close during the beginning. Sitting down next to each other as you watched the first events. Momo tagged along but stayed a bit behind. You tried playing it cool at first, keeping a slight distance. There's never been any awkwardness between the two of you, so conversation came easily. Almost like nothing ever happened. Almost.
There was a shift in Sana. She went quiet and appeared to be focused on the current musical act, but her face showed she was debating something inside her head. You could tell it was something serious by the way she was chewing on her bottom lip.
You can't recall Sana's exact words. She had leaned close into your side. Her front touching your shoulder. Breath tickling your ear as she whispered, "I miss you y/n/n."
"Take me back y/n..."
"Please."
You turned around to meet her face. The sudden shift in Sana caught you off guard. Not expecting this sudden topic. You regained focus quickly, shifting to Sana's features that were just an inch away. She had a soft, sad smile. Her eyes pleading. Sana was your weakness. Your everything. You couldn't ever say no to her. So you met her eyes and gave her a slight nod while softly smiling at her. Sana's smile grew and she gave you a small peck on the cheek.
The rest of that night was great. Until Sana disappeared.
She had gone off somewhere with Nayeon and Jihyo. The anxiety had returned. This time you were sure that it was about performing later that night. You wanted to run away. Your hands began to sweat and you searched for Sana.
Professor Park came up to you, asked you when you wanted to go up. Currently it was the second open mic participant on stage. He said you could go third or last for the open mic. "I'll go third. I don't want to end it weak." Professor Park laughed at your comment, thinking you were joking. You were joking. Partially.
Sana came up to you as your conversation with the professor ended. When he left you started complaining and pretended you were going to leave. You knew Sana would beg you to stay. She held onto your hands trying to calm you down.
You were up next and had begun to really get nervous. Performances and public speaking just aren't your thing.
The host called up your name. Your hands started to shake. Heart pounded in your ears. You parted from Sana, she slowly let your hands go. You hesitated letting go. You wanted to take her with you.
As you walked up to the stage you heard cheering and applause. You turned to look at the crowd. There you recognized Momo, Mina, Dahyun, Chaeyoung, and Tzuyu cheering loudly. You took the mic and mumbled that you weren't prepared. Though you don't know if you said it loud enough for everyone to have heard. Hopefully no one had caught that.
You recited your poem's title and said it incorrectly. You mentally slapped yourself, but you rectified yourself and restated the title. You continued with your poem. Your voice, hands, and legs weren't as shaky as the previous performances in class. You heard this one guy in the crowd blurt, "Shiiiiiiiitt" as you read through the final lines of your poem.
At the end there was a small hesitation for the applause because of the sudden twist in your work. That was your intention. The applause and cheers came soon. Especially from your friends. You turned to glance at them and saw Nayeon, Jeongyeon, and Jihyo pretending to wipe tears from their eyes as they "cried" on each other's shoulders. Competing with each other on who could seem the most realistic.
You got down the stage. Hurriedly walked down the middle towards the back of the cafe. To Sana. As soon as you reached her she opened her arms. You wrapped your arms around her. Sana gently rubbed your back as you held tightly onto her. "I'm so proud of you baby" she cooed.
Sana let go and slightly pushed you off to grab a hold of your hand. She led you to a secluded area of the cafe. Then she palmed your face and grabbed the back of your neck to pull you into a kiss.
You had missed the feeling of her soft lips.
But like all good things, it came to an end.
Nighttime came quicker than you wanted it to. You were now back in your dorm. All you wanted was to lay in bed and relax. The rollercoaster of emotions draining your energy. But the ride still wasn't over. You were sat up in bed, on the phone with Sana.
She wanted to break up again. She had just asked to get back together a couple hours ago but here you were. Sana asked for space once again. Explaining that she had been dealing with insecurities, didn't know who she was, and had other personal issues. She needed time to find herself and figure things out for herself. As hard as you tried to reassure her, tell her she was perfect, give her nothing but love she insisted she needed space. You respected her decision.
That Friday night felt like it would never end. Felt like you couldn't catch a break. You felt nothing and everything at the same time.
Word was out that you and Sana broke up. Again. How everyone found out, you don't know. You were sitting in the common room before class with Momo and Jeongyeon. They were bickering about some nonsense. You didn't have it in you to join them. So you pretended to read your English textbook. Sana entered the common room. She headed straight towards Miyeon, who was across the room, to ask her about upcoming finals. You couldn't stop yourself from looking at her. That was when Nayeon and Jihyo joined your table.
Nayeon shoved your shoulder, "Why aren't you with your girl?"
"She's not my girl," you whispered.
Somehow Momo and Jeongyeon who were bickering the entire time with Jihyo included, who joined in as soon as she sat down, managed to hear and quieted down. They all looked at you, their eyes a mix of pity and sadness. This wasn't anything new to them but it still saddened them to hear the news.
Nayeon had always been supportive of you and Sana. She was the one who introduced you to one another. So she couldn't help but to gently ask, "Why?"
As you remembered all of yesterday's events, Sana whispering to take her back. Holding her hands again. Being wrapped in her arms. Her soft warm lips. Her warm smile and gentle eyes. Being comforted by her. Having her close. The long conversation you had over the phone. The break up. The space she wanted. You felt your chest contort and rip in two.
"I don't know."
"Well, I do know but I just don't want to say."
It was clear what Sana wanted. She made sure of that. You just couldn't explain that to Nayeon and the others without breaking. Thankfully, they seemed to have understood that.
"Hey, we get it. It'll be alright y/n/n." Jeongyeon calmly said as she wrapped an arm around your shoulder.
"C'mon now let's head to class."
All of you got up and started to head for class.
Throughout the day you dragged yourself from class to class. Trying to forget about Sana. You were failing miserably. You decided to head to the restroom to splash some water on your face. See if that would help.
As you were about to push the restroom door it was suddenly pulled open from the other side. You looked up to find Sana, surprised to see you. Your eyes met and you felt your heart clench. You weren't thinking. Your brain stopped working and your heart started going into overdrive, so you jokingly muttered, "Excuse me...I'm just going in for a quick cry" as you squeezed beside Sana to enter.
Sana quickly turned around and headed towards you. Shutting the door in the process.
You felt a hand take a hold of your wrist pulling you back. You didn't expect Sana to follow you in. You really did feel like crying now.
Sana studied you. You couldn't meet her gaze.
She apologized and you couldn't conjure up a response. You just stood there staring at the floor. Brain still not functioning. Heart still in overdrive, wanting nothing but Sana. Your heart fought with itself inside your ribcage. The hammering and ache screaming to run and stay.
Then she pulled you into her arms. As much as you wanted to cry mere seconds ago you couldn't. Your heart was rushing with a mix of emotions, but the fight inside from earlier had subsided. You just let yourself sink into Sana for the moment. You wanted to kiss her. So you pulled back a little and leaned in. Halfway through you felt Sana's arms begin to come up your shoulders. Getting ready to push you back. It was then you realized you shouldn't, so instead you swiftly glided your head to lean on Sana's shoulder. You couldn't help but let out a defeated sigh. Your heart sunk so low.
A pair of hands lifted to caress the back of your neck. Sana guided your head up and leaned in. The kiss was soft, it was more than a peck but still it felt too short. You had gotten what you wanted, but you didn't know how to feel about that.
Sana pulled back and softly palmed the side of your face caressing you with a sad smile. You tried reciprocating as best as you could, but your smile was much smaller and weaker than Sana's. Then she exited the restroom. Leaving you there. You stood there for a while. You couldn't stop replaying what just happened. You felt so stupid. Lost.
-- End of Flashback --
The sun has fully set. Your thoughts are still filled with Sana. Will she ever come back? It's been at least half a year since then. You still see her around campus but she's always glued to Miyeon's hip. Any and all attempts to get her to talk to you are intercepted by her best friend. Sana also makes an effort in ignoring you. If you pass each other in the hall she practically sprints away with her head down. Or she feigns to be doing something on her phone. Face immensely close to her phone trying to block her face from your sight. If you catch her staring at you she turns away instantly. If she's hanging out with Momo, Nayeon, or any of your other friends she makes an excuse to leave. Never acknowledging your presence. She practically runs from you. It left you dumbfounded the first couple of times. Leaving the others to apologize on Sana's behalf. You couldn't handle the pain all of Sana's actions caused you. So you stopped trying to reach out or get close. You accepted the distance she wanted to create.
Now you just feel a hollow cavern that continues to grow inside your chest as more time passes. At this point your ribcage feels sore from the constant fight and ache your heart has been through. All you could do is sigh as you put out the remaining bud of the cigarette you had lit up. Lazily you brush yourself off to head back inside.
"I'll wait until you're ready."
#twice#twice imagines#twice x fem reader#twice x reader#minatozaki sana#sana x reader#sana x fem!reader#angst#wlw#wlw angst
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Jade Shadows Thoughts
(NOTICE: I have edited this post after a few days and many lovely replies and tags giving me more insight and opinions, overall my view of this quest has gotten a lot more positive, thank you all <3) okaaayyyy I am utterly rattled rn lmao also made the mistake of looking at tumblr after doing the quest and as expected it seems to be a 50/50 of hating or loving it. so here are my personal thoughts, I am a little scared but talk seems to be civil thankfully. I can definitely agree on the sentiment that this quest needed more time, cause let's be honest the people hating this quest wouldn't be jumping to the things they're jumping to if Jade herself got more screen-time before the big drop, warframe's style has always been vague and never 100% straight-forward and I think that unfortunately hurt it a bit this time, as what they didn't show came off wrong to many people and while I sorta see why I disagree on some parts. I also feel like the quest kinda got a bit *too* hyped both by DE and the fanbase's theories, way too short, it deserved and needed to be a bit longer for it's special narrative. Jade kinda got a weird spot, both being the main focus alongside Stalker but also hardly explored. But let's be honest, most of the negativity is caused by this outside-circumstance alone. Now, what I absolutely disagree with is people insisting that DE was trying to say "bodily autonomy bad" or that Stalker didn't care about her and only the child, thing is I thought it was pretty fucking clear that she *wanted* the child in what little was shown and she was going to die no matter the outcome (thanks to the orokin to absolutely no one's surprise) and Stalker in his guilt for all she's done for him wanted to make sure that he at least kept this one promise to Her, cause She wanted it. she still had bodily autonomy in the fact She wanted this, she wanted the child no matter what. and she wanted stalker to protect her and the kid. And he did, like a true loving partner. DE has a long track record of being very autonomy-positive. A point they make time and time again is that ripping it away is *bad* and horrifying, the quest is a bittersweet tragedy, not a horror. Honestly there would be 0 issue if DE had given us a Jade-only quest before this one, I personally would've preferred it as well, she's cool as hell she deserves it. who knows maybe DE will see all of this and make prequel quests? we can only hope. I do not want to assume the worst of anyone or anything cause that's a miserable existence. Look I personally enjoyed the quest and get the feeling whoever wrote it did it out of some personal experience or sorrow, that's at least the vibe I got. It's a tragedy, but her choice was seen till the end, many women choose to still have a child despite knowing they won't make it, many also don't, that's why choice is important. and she did, she chose her child that she was having while likely forcibly infested and turned into a warframe. (also remember there are women on the team who likely looked at this.) there are some other iffy parts of the quest, (really should've been the drifter instead of the operator if they were gonna do that, but that's personal discomfort.) but overall I enjoyed it and open to explore the implications of a born-warframe-child and Stalker healing as they both grow together. These are my thoughts, and I can understand why people like or dislike this quest, but I think it's fine and just ended up in a very unfortunate spot due to outside circumstances beyond it's control. (sorry if any of this comes off as aggressive it is not my intention despite how riled I am by some folk online, I disagree with you but I do not hate you, I don't even know you.)
Her choice, His promise, Their light.
Thank you for reading my first ever text post about something I care about, not sure I'll be doing this again any time soon out of anxiety lol (Edit: and thanks to everyone responding to this post wonderfully, ya'll are great and have lessened my anxiety and have made me appreciate this quest more <3)
#warframe#jade shadows#jade shadows spoilers#this not meant to start discourse btw#just wanted to drop the weight off my mind before i explode#warframe encourages people to put pieces together and come up with things on their own so lets please be nice
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THE LOVE LASTS SO LONG (9)
In which Aubrey gets interviewed...
series masterlist
★・・・・★・・・・ ★・・・・★
ellemagazine posted
ellemagazine Our June edition features Aubrey Yang on her directing debut, the trajectory of her career and new friends in Formula One. Full article linked in bio.
tagged: aubreyyang
liked by formula1, olliebearman, mckennagraceful and 80,944 others
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user1 ON MY HANDS AND KNEES BARK BARK SHES SO FINE
aubreyyang thank you for having me Elle! always a blast 💋
-- aubberieloverss MOTHERRR
dior.n.goodjohn ILY UR SO BEAUTIFUL AND ETHERAL
-- aubreyyang stawpp ur making me blush
formula1 thank you for the shout out! hope to see you in the Ferrari paddocks soon 🏎️
liked by aubreyyang
-- f1wagsupdates BAHAHA f1 admin ur brave for that one
lilymhe prettiest girl
-- aubreyyang me and dior miss u tons! can't wait to see u soon
mvertsppdudu can ollie fight ill catch him in the paddocks
ELLE MAGAZINE
NEW ISSUE
INTERVIEW WITH AUBREY YANG
Aubrey Yang, the multi-faceted actress debuts her talent and grit for directing and screenwriting in her short film Pelt, winning the Best Screenplay and a notable nominee for the Best Film during London Film week. Since we've last seen her at Elle New York, she has turned 18, nearing 19 now, and made some drastic changes to her life.
Since her film, Yang has not been in any other production as talent, but teases us with a new project "that's coming soon, don't worry". She adores her new found love for being a creative, and is scouting to get her hands on more projects in Hollywood on that side of the camera.
Her studies continue at New York University and she is set to graduate early, next year. When asked about her ability to balance school and work, she smiles knowingly and tells us that "it's important to take breaks, but more importantly, I've chosen things I love to do".
During these breaks, Yang is often seen with fellow young actress Dior Goodjohn and international pop sensation Olivia Rodrigo. But 18 has brought a new hobby: Formula One.
"I met Lily [Muni He] and Alex [Albon] at a gala, and we hit it off. They're like my parents" she answers adoringly. She has been seen multiple times in both the Williams and Ferrari garages visiting with fans and learning about the mechanics of racing.
"I've met some wonderful people; I never really got to be a regular teenager because I was working and going to university early. They've really helped teach me about having fun and letting loose."
Next year when we inevitably feature her lovely face again, we'll see the new changes to her life.
MESSAGES
ollie
I read ur article it was great
sad I didn't get a shout out tho :(
aubrey
sorry boo
PROMISE TO GIVE YOU ONE NEXT YEARR
ollie
okay :)
anyways r we still on for the trip?
aubrey
yes mr. bearman
ollie
I was thinking Charles and Alex might want to go w us
aubrey
YESSS MY FAV MONAGESQUES
ollie
gotta go but talk later? ☺️
aubrey
kk cya bearman
ollie
bye yang :)
MESSAGES
alex 🖼️
cou cou chérie!
(hey dear)
aubrey 🎬
AHH ALEX J'avais l'intention de t'envoyer un texto ! On part en voyage en Europe ?
(I was meaning to text you, are we on for the Europe trip?)
alex 🖼️
yes but I have smth to ask
aubrey 🎬
um not the English what's wrong
alex 🖼️
DO U LIKE OLLIE
aubrey 🎬
UM BYE WHY
alex 🖼️
bc I have to watch him text u and its dégoûtant
(disgusting)
aubrey 🎬
bro idk
dior thinks we like each other
its just hes becoming such a good friend
he makes me smile
and hes so sweet and kind and gentle
hes not like any other guy ik
alex 🖼️
its going to be such a long trip 😔
aubreyyang posted on their story
olliebearman replied to your story
cute 😊
aubreyyang
ikr shes my cousins baby
olliebearman
oh
very cute
wanna play 9 ball on message
aubreyyang
YOURE ON
bearyfast_04 posted
bearyfast_04 I think im ready to be a father
liked by alexandrasaintmleux, leosdad and 10 others
leosdad fatherhood is hard
-- landoakabob u have a dog
-- leosdad u take that back hes my son
pastryboy SIR U ARE 21 WDYM CHILDREN
-- bearyfast_04 but look at her 🥰
-- arthuranddw another fallen soldier
★・・・・★・・・・ ★・・・・★
Taglist: @callsignwidow @iloveyou3000morgan @honethatty12 @taygrls
© sweetteainthesummerx.tumblr. all rights reserved. unauthorized copying, translation, or claiming of my writing or any works as your own is strictly prohibited.
#f1 drivers#f1 smau#f1 x reader#formula 1#ollie bearman#ollie bearman x reader#ollie bearman x you#charles leclerc#f1 imagine#formula one#f1 2024#f1 fic#f1 fanfic#ollie bearman x female reader#ollie bearman fluff#ollie bearman imagine#ollie bearman x y/n#oliver bearman
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To be human part 2
Rottmnt Leo x reader, gender neutral, friends to lovers, himbo Leo (?), one sided pining
Part 1 here, Part 3
Summary: Leo has the biggest crush on you but he's afraid that you'd never date a mutant, so with the help of a clooking broach he plans to become your perfect human boyfriend!
☆
Idk if you can tell but this is kinda Aladdin inspired
Also I wasn't sure abt posting this since it has no Y/N interactions umm so sorry if you're dissapointed
I promise the next one will have fluffy moments between Y/N and Leo!! Sorry this is short
Tag list!!
@lunaflyer @wings-of-sapphire @ssak-i @nessarolla-in-constant-flux @envyjmoney
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"¿Qué hice para merecer esto?" Is what the disgruntled Señor Hueso muttered under his breath, as he watched Leo come crashing into his restaurant.
Of all the times that mutant decides to show up, it had to be on a good day. A loud sigh left the skeleton's mouth as he watched the turtle bump into one of his waiters, knocking all the dishes out of her hand.
"Señor! Señor!" Leo called out eagerly as he approached, "I have a really, really important request and you have to-"
He was interrupted by Hueso placing his hand up, narrowing his eyes in annoyance.
"Instead of disturbing my guests, Pepino, let's talk in the staff room."
~
Leo was still wiping spilled spaghetti off himself as he spoke. Amazingly, that didn't stop his excited flow.
"Señor, bone head, buddy! Long time no see, right?" Leo asked in an overly friendly manner, offering Hueso a hand.
Hueso glanced at his hand, which had marinara sauce on it, before glancing back at Leo with an unimpressed expression.
"Uf hijo, did you just come here to cause trouble?" He asked rather bluntly.
Leo chuckled to himself, "Of course not! I just came here for a little... help."
"Help?" Hueso repeated, tilting his head as he watched Leo's over excited behavior.
"Yeah, I was wondering if you could help me get my hands on a cloaking brooch." He explained briefly while wiping away the bit of sauce that was on his shoulder.
"A cloaking brooch?" Hueso repeated raising his brow, "Why would you need one of those? I've seen you walk among humans like it's nothing."
"It's not for that."
Leo bit his lip unsure whether he should let the truth spill, no one knew of his little crush and he was afriad if he started talking about them he wouldn't know when to stop. So he took the easier route.
"It's for uh- You know... science." He lied, smiling awkwardly as if that made his reply more believable.
Señor Hueso simply shot him an unconvinced expression.
"Este idiota..." The skeleton muttered under his breath, "Why don't you just say why you really want it? It would save you from the embarrassment of lying to my face."
Yeah, Hueso wasn't buying it. Figures.
"Okay okay, I'll admit that wasn't my best performance," Leo said with a grin, although his trade mark smirk faded into a small frown as Hueso stared back at him with narrowed eyes.
"Truth is I'm trying to impress someone..." He admitted quietly, his gaze darting to the ground, while he fidgeted with his hands sheepishly.
Hueso blinked in surprise at the turtles sudden shyness, "Trying to impress someone?" He repeated curiously, looking back to the blushing turtle for futher confimration.
Leo bit his lip, his heart fluttering at the thought of them, "A human." He confessed softly.
"I've never felt this way about anyone before, they're just perfect in every way!" He explained brightly, though his happy expression faultered, "But, I don't think they'd be interested in, this whole situation." He frowned, gesturing to himself.
Hueso nodded slowly as he listened, "I see," He hummed in reply, looking thoughtful as he considered Leo's situation for a moment, "So you want to pretend to be human and lie to them?"
Leo frowned at the skeletons blutness, "It's not a lie! I'm just... bending... the truth," He said, his brow furrowing as he spoke.
Even he didn't believe himself this time.
"Alright it's kinda a lie, but what other chance do I have?"
"I don't know, tell them the truth?" Hueso retorted, Leo couldn't help but roll his eyes as he was lectured on the obvious answer, "If you really think this person is worth it, then you should be honest with them."
"The last thing I need to be is honest." The turtle insisted stubbornly, his expression souring at the idea of even attemping to tell his crush how he felt.
Leo hated to picture it, he hated that he knew his voice would tremble as he would try his best to convey to them how deeply he felt.
He hated how he knew he would stammer over his words as he scrambled to find the best way to express his feelings.
And then he would have to wait impatiently for their reply, fearing the worst, after this new discovery.
Not like he could blame Y/N.
Who wouldn't turn down a nervous idiot? And why would anyone ever be interested in someone who looks like him?
"I don't want to risk losing them." Leo finally said, sighing before meeting Hueso gaze again with a serious expression.
"Look, all I need is a brooch. I just want a chance to be with them and make them happy. Please, Señor?"
As Hueso watched Leo's sad expression he was still unsure how to reply, he knew this was an awful idea yet Leo seemed so attached to it. The puppy dog eyes that the blue masked turtle was giving him eventually casused a defeated sigh escape Hueso's mouth.
"Fine, I have a spare somewhere around here," Hueso muttered reluctantly, too tired to keep pushing, turning to his desk and opening a drawer, "Just don't blame me when things go terribly wrong."
Leo's expression immediately brightened.
"Really?!" He leaned over Señor Hueso's shoulder, eagerly watching as the skeleton searched.
Eventually, Hueso found it, a gold gemstone-adorned brooch.
As Leo looked at the badazzled brooch, excitement began to bubble in his chest, the glamorous item really did make this whole situation seem a lot cooler. This was his key to being Y/N's perfect romantic partner, something he'd dreamed of for far too long that was now finally a possibility. His heart soared at the thought.
"Here," Hueso said, handing him the brooch, "Try not to get spaghetti on it, Pepino."
Leo was practically vibrating with excitement as the brooch was placed into his hands. He nodded at Hueso's words despite not really hearing them.
"Thanks Señor! I can keep this right?" He asked.
"Just don't damage it." Hueso warned in reply, "If you do, it could stop-"
But before he got the chance to finish his words, Leo had disappeared into another blue portal.
"-working..."
#Spotify#rottmnt#rottmnt leo x reader#rottmnt leo x you#rottmnt tbh#rottmnt to be human#rottmnt x reader#rottmnt x y/n#rottmnt x you#tbh#to be human#rottmmt x gn reader#gn reader#rottmnt leo x y/n#rottmnt leo x gn reader#rottmnt leo#rottmnt Leonardo#rottmnt himbo leo#tmnt x reader#Idk if this is himbo#hes being a bit of a silly billy rn#but its because hes excited#senor hueso#rottmnt senor hueso#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise of the tmnt#rise leo#rise x reader#rise leo x reader#rise of the tmnt x reader
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It's just the beggining (Oscar Piastri)
Oscar hasn't done or said anything, so you're taking matters into your own hands
Note: english is not my first language. It's my first Oscar piece and I'm nervous posting this, but hopefully you enjoy it! 🫶
Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!
my masterlist
Cw: mentions reader's grandparents' health issues, mentions the situation with McLaren and Daniel, insomnia
Tag list: @myloverjk-blog
"Hey, Y/N!", James called you once he saw you walk by his classroom, "hey", you greeted back, adjusting your books on your arms.
"There is a new kid, I'm sure you know, Oscar Piastri his name is, and apparently he's staying the long weekend too, like you", he trailed off, not knowing if he was stepping further than he should.
"Yes, I am staying, it's okay to talk about it", you gave him tight lipped smile, "well, I was hoping you'd keep him company - he's a bit shy, but he's very fun to be around and the teacher also thought it would be good since you're both staying", he reasoned as you nodded.
You had to stay back because your grandparents didn't live in England, and because of their old age and problems that naturally arose with that, your parents had to fly out and spend sometime with them, meaning you didn't have anyone back home, so you stayed. As for Oscar, you found out that he was staying back because his family was in Melbourne.
"At first, I just had online schooling, but it got trickier to manage and my dad needed to go back to work so I had to stay back", he explained when you asked him why he was there, "and I hope I can focus on racing, but you already know that", he scoffed softly.
"I don't think I do, I'm sorry", you narrowed your eyes, genuinely unaware of what he was talking about.
After he told you all about his career until that moment, as well as his hopes and dreams, he chuckled, "you really didn't know?", he wondered.
"I didn't! The girls said something about you moving here but I didn't listen much, I'm not that into gossip and my memory is like Dory's, I can never keep up with the latest who likes who and who flirted with what's his face", you earnestly replied.
For the first time since he arrived at the school, he felt like he could really trust someone and he could hope for new friendships on this side of the world.
You were there for his final race in F4, clapping at him on the podium, and even F3 and F2 despite your university deadlines, always making sure you could support him in every way you could.
"Hey, Osc", you said over the phone, setting your pen down the desk and swivelling in the chair. You wanted to get as much knowledge and experience as possible, so you applied to do a internship in a physiotherapy clinic near your apartment during the summer.
"Hey, Y/N, how are you doing?", he asked as you could notice the antsyness on his voice.
"I'm good, it's a bit of a slow day here, my supervisor said I could read up on a few articles", you mused, "is everything okay?", you asked.
"I was wondering if you wanted to have dinner tonight", he began, "you can come to my flat if that's okay, I'll order something in since I can't be trusted in the kitchen", he suggested.
"Fine by me, I'd like that, sounds really nice", you smiled, "I'll see you soon, then", you added, not wanting to dwell much on the fact that he didn't answer your question.
When you left the clinic, you walked to Oscar's place since the sun had graced you for the day and it was still nice to be out. Knocking on the door, you waited for him to open it, "I'm still in my scrubs as I didn't see the need to change", you said as you walked inside, hugging Oscar after dropping your backpack on the floor.
"Hey, you look nice, don't worry about it", he smiled as he led you to the living room, "I had to go and get the take out myself, but it's still warm", he said as you sat at the dining table.
"Now can you tell me if there's something wrong?", you wondered as you poured some of the wine he kept for you at his place on your glass.
"I have something to tell you actually", he played with his glass while he fought the smile on his lips, "this weekend I finally had some conversations with McLaren", he began.
"McLaren?", you asked as you served yourself of the food in front of you, taking some bimi brocoli and then some of the warm noodles.
"Yes, McLaren. We finally spoke about contracts and, this morning, I signed the official driver contract for next season", he stated as if he was saying that the sun had been out today.
"You did what? Since when has this been in the works?", you gasped, dropping the kitchen utensils and looking at him intently, "you're driving for McLaren next season?", he nodded, "like, driving on track? Oh my Goodness, Oscar! That's amazing!", you got up and hugged him, "why didn't you lead with that?", you pinched the nape of his neck playfully as you kept the tears from falling from your eyes. This was his dream and he was getting to live it as early as the end of the year when pre season preparations began.
"I didn't want to tell you over the phone", he shrugged his shoulders.
"But how? This is huge, Oscar!", you smiled, your teeth showing and eyes squinting with how high your cheeks rose.
"There were a lot of conversations about it, specially the last few weeks", Oscar explained, "they still want to keep it quiet", he warned.
"So you're driving alongside Lando?", you wondered. You only followed motorsport and the Formula series because of your bestfriend, so the assumption you made was based on what you had seen and read.
"Yes, hence why they want to keep it quiet, I've only told you and my family", he mentioned, "my manager knows that, obviously, but I really need you to keep quiet about it", he smiled.
"Absolutely, don't worry!", you assured, "this is so amazing Oscar! You're going to drive in Formula One! Aren't you amazed?", you beamed.
"I put in the work too, you know?", he dramatically feigned offense as you hugged him tighter, "this is your dream, Osc", you cooed, letting the tears fall freely down your cheeks as you swayed you both around, "I'm so proud of you", you hiccuped, holding his head close to your lips so you could kiss his forehead.
"Let's eat, this is getting cold", your best friend urged as the situation for more intimate and brought you closer and closer to the thing he had been avoiding for nearly a year.
The feelings he had been arbouring for you weren't just friendship. How could he keep himself from being in love with you? You had been there with him and for him when he was alone in a new country, being the other shy kid that spent the long weekend im boarding school, and since then you had been attached by the hip. You were kind, caring, intelligent, beautiful inside and outside and anyone would be a fool to not see why Oscar felt the way he did about you.
.
"I'm just going to a training camp, Y/N, I do these every year!", Oscar reasoned as you groaned.
"Who am I going to complain to about university? Or how noisy my neighbours are? I'm going to die of boredom", you stated, "when you come back, I will have ceased to exist because of boredom and lack of attention", you exaggeratedly threw yourself on your sofa.
"You won't, silly", he chuckled, pulling you up since his trainer was picking him up soon, "you're going to go out and enjoy yourself, okay? You'll barely notice I'm gone", he tried as you helped him with his suitcases down to the door.
"I'll miss you", you muttered as you hugged him, "enjoy your training camp!", you smiled as you pulled away, waving at him before you made your way to your place.
Getting on with the project you had to hand in at the end of the week, you got it all through to the end, leaving time to proofread later.
You clicked on the folder where you kept your photos and videos, looking through them and reliving all of the memories you had in there.
Most of them had Oscar somehow, wether it was a screen grab from one of your FaceTime calls when he was at races, picnics in the park and lazy days at your place.
You had to admit it, for your sake and Oscar's sake as your friendship was on the line. At first you thought it was just the fact that a boy seemed to want to spend time with you, so you put it to that. Recently, however, things changed perspective and you felt stronger feelings and emotions when you thought about him.
You loved spending time with him and cherished every single hour he chose to spend with you whenever he didn't have racing related duties. Every time he hugged you, you clung just a little longer to feel hia body against yours and his arms enveloping you.
Whenever someone approached you in the rare times you went out clubbing with your friends, "I have a boyfriend" became more a wish and a need rather than some made up excuse to get guys to leave you alone.
So, to sum it up, you either had an honest conversation with him or continued to dwell on feelings you couldn't keep to yourself.
.
"Y/N just sent me a picture of her notes, can you believe they ask them to know all of that?", he showed his trainer Kim while they had lunch after a strenuous workout.
"I had to learn most of that, too", he said nonchalantly, not necessarily diminishing your competences and intelligence but letting Oscar know that maybe his infatuation with you had a source elsewhere.
"Y/N is very smart, I'm sure she'll do really well - oh, she sent me a picture, she's all dressed up!", he said as he inspected the mirror picture. He assumed it was a requirement for your presentation, as you usually preferred comfy attire, since you had a pair of trousers and a shirt, some small heels on your feet and your bright smile that left him feeling butterflies in his stomach every single time, "she looks gorgeous", he said as he texted you the same words along with wishes of good luck.
"Something you'd like to say?", Oscar quesioned when he felt Kim's eyes on him as he put the phone back on the table, screen down.
"I'm just here wondering why you're not together", the trainer offered simply after he wiped his mouth on the napkin.
"No, we are not together, at least not yet", he mused. The thought had crossed his mind, admitting how he felt about you before the season began. If everything went belly up and you didn't feel the same and didn't see him that way, he would occupy his time and channel all of his energy into racing; if you did feel the same, he would have been worrying for nothing and would have a extra spring up his step for his first season in Formula One.
"Good to know you're working on it", Kim waved his fork at Oscar, "now we need to finish this and we'll do some recovery stretches", he announced as Oscar groaned, prolonging his meal as long as he could.
.
Today, Oscar was coming back from Lanzarote and you couldn't wait to speak to him. Lately, it all dawned on you.
It happened a couple of nights ago, a slight insomnia episode keeping you up when you thought about what things would be like from now on. Oscar would travel a lot more, and he would be in a much public role compared to his previous one. It would seem stupid to other people, but a lot more people would know him, and you were sure they would fall in love with him. How could they not? Hence why you wanted to quit those thoughts while you were ahead of them.
I'm on the cab to your place, it should take another 10 minutes and Can't wait to see you, Oscar texted you just as you finished tidying your living room.
You missed him dearly, so when you threw yourself into his arms, you didn't let go as he kicked his suitcases into your apartment while still holding close to him, "I kind of need to get my backpack off my back, and I can't do that if I don't set you somewhere - only for a bit at the very least", Oscar suggested after trying to balance you against his body with one arm but he didn't feel safe enough to let you go without you falling.
Reluctantly, you got back down, feet back on the floor as he discarded his backpack before he tapped your hip twice, "up again, I want a proper hug", he mumbled as you jumped back, his hands protectively holding your thighs up as he nuzzled his face on your neck, "I need you so, so much", he sighed.
"I missed you too", you replied back, "and I don't ever want to miss you like this when I don't know how to feel about you", you forwarded. Now or never, you thought as you jumped out of his hold and faced him.
"I missed you like I have never missed you before, not even when you go a visit your family or when you went away for triple headers - and I've been trying to understand why and I finally realised what it was. I like you, more than friends like eachother - for Goodness' sake, I'm in love with you", you chuckled nervously as you admitted it out loud to him, "and everyone else will love you too - I just know it -, so soon enough you won't be my Osc anymore and I couldn't not tell you. People - and these gorgeous girls all over the world - are going to like you so much and I won't be able to compete with them, so I'm just telling you how I feel. You can leave if you want or we'll just stay here in silence of that works too, but I needed to admit my feelings", you let out in one go.
Oscar smiled, a big teeth and gums showing smile as his eyes crinkled at your words, "I'm not leaving, and we are not going to be silent - at least immediately - because I want to tell you how I feel", he began, "I'm in love with you too; I have been for about two years and only realised it a year ago, and I don't want to pretend anymore. I want to be able to kiss you, to hug you, to take you with me wherever possible, to sleep next to you, to argue with you, I want all of it. With you", he said, hand cupping your cheek as his eyes asked for consent to kiss your lips.
It was as you dreamed it would be, soft, gentle and caring, lips moving in sync as you held him by his waist, pulling him closer to you.
"I thought I was loosing you to the whole F1 fandom", you chuckled, looking up at him once you pulled away.
"Of course you won't, you're my best girl", he winked, "this is just the beggining for us", he added as he pulled you to cuddle on the sofa, sharing his stories of the past days as you revelled in the feeling of being in his arms.
#oscar piastri imagine#oscar piastri x reader#oscar piastri x you#oscar piastri fluff#oscar piastri fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 fluff#f1 fanfic#f1 x reader
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why are people arguing over whether plagariarism exists
im starting to wonder if people are thinking of the definition of plagiarism only as it pertains to writing, and thinking "well theres no words jumbled around so its not plagiarism"
i didn't really consider that some people might not know 'art plagiarism' is a real, seperate thing and the definition is a bit different. this is my most good faith interpretation of the perplexing responses i've received
the worst faith interpretation is they are all plagiarists defending themselves in offense lol
art plagiarism has been widely accepted to be a thing for a long time. i'm not saying anything new!
i'm not going to argue this any longer because i feel bad for my followers having to read all the drama. if anyone wants to read my opinions on the matter you can do so in the replies / reblogs of my original post! i'll also tag everything accordingly now :3
thanks for the ask and sorry for sounding off about it in the reply!!! <3
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track 003: twisting stories, all because you're jealous
A/N: i am back at it guys, sorry for the angst? i hate the written section of this with burning fashion, i think i rewrote it like 20 times (that's why it took so long to post) but i can't get it to be where i want it to be so fuck it we ball.
also, some additional warnings here: nothing specific but mostly crude language, swearing and touching a bit on sexual harassment (not exactly, just don't know how to explain the rumors spread about paola in warnings, english is not my first language)
masterlist | previous next
liked by jensonbutton, oscarpiastri and others
paola_sainz road crimes were definitely committed, but at least we got the band back together ;) featuring Jenson the taxi driver
tagged: oscarpiastri, logansargeant, arthur_leclerc, frederikvestiofficial, paularon_, liamlawson30, jensonbutton
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jensonbutton I knew that's all I was to you, a glorified taxi driver
↳ paola_sainz don't take it personally ❤️
shithappens the prema (+liam) band is back!!! the world is healing
elmatadorf1 get away from them! leave the drivers alone, i can't believe she's still trying to leech off of them 🐍💀
F4ST_C4R did you race? if so who won???
logansargeant hate to break it to you, but you were the main instigator of those crimes Lola 🙄
↳ paola_sainz so not true! oscarpiastri tell him!
↳ oscarpiastri it's all Arthur's fault
↳ mcwilliams not Arthur catching strays 👀
cuddlyxricc will you comment on the paddock ban or ignore it like everything else?? 😒
redleclerc we need to know who won!! 👀
4ND1 what i would give to go karting with all of them 😭
↳ lightning_enjyr right?? it looks like so much fun
lewibear did you win?
hammertime_1 i bet she destroyed them
charles_leclerc I think my invitation got lost somewhere?
↳ arthur_leclerc Find your own friends Charles 🙄
frederikvestiofficial We need to do this more often!
hamilteaa how is it that she posted this man so many times and we still don't have any characteristic feature?? it could literally be any brunette 😭
arthur_leclerc For everyone asking, I won 😎
↳ oscarpiastri That's not true
↳ paularon_ No you didn't Arthur
↳ logansargeant mate, you came last
oscarpiastri Always a pleasure to race alongside you 😉
↳ paola_sainz even when I get super competitive?
↳ oscarpiastri Especially then
↳ paola_sainz 🧡😉
catstri mister piastri, she is taken 😳
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oscarpiastri posted new instagram stories!
caption: even when arthur_leclerc attempted 'the ichident' reprise on the main straight, paola_sainz still won
⟶ paola_sainz replied to your story!
paola_sainz aw osc, you're making me blush ☺️
⟶ arthur_leclerc replied to your story!
arthur_leclerc Only because she cheated!
oscarpiastri Excuse you, my girlfriend does not cheat
AUSTRIA 2024
paola_sainz posted new instagram stories!
caption 1: bit of a chill evening today, can't say I'm used to this during race weekends lol
⟶ oscarpiastri replied to your story!
oscarpiastri I really wish you were here baby, you have no idea 🧡
paola_sainz me too Osc, but dw you'll do great
caption 2: keeping up with Redbull Ring from my bed, let's go boys!
caption 3: we all knew max was gonna win (congrats by the way maxverstappen1) but HELL YEAHHH OSC! THAT'S P2 MATEEE 🧡
⟶ maxverstappen1 replied to your story!
maxverstappen1 Thanks Paola 🎉
⟶ oscarpiastri replied to your story!
oscarpiastri mate?
paola_sainz isn't that how you aussies relay affection?
oscarpiastri 🖕
paola_sainz 🧡
GREAT BRITAIN 2024
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paola_sainz british grand prix? don't know her. this week is for miss America and miss America only. welcome to the 4th of July bash at Jenson's house ;)
tagged: logansargeant, jensonbutton, oscarpiastri, alex_albon, arthur_leclerc, danielricciardo
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hamilteaa they celebrated 4th of July with Logan 😭😭 no one speak to me
danielricciardo As a honorary American I approve, the free alcohol was a big plus👌🤠 Jenson should invite us over more often
↳ jensonbutton I was not aware of this happening until it was too late
↳ paola_sainz you love us ;)
↳ jensonbutton Unfortunately 🙄
srgashley logan with the flag 😂 he's so american i can't
XGEORG1NA man, I'd kill for some ribs with mac'&cheese rn 😩
oscarpiastri Is this what it feels like to attend a frat party?
↳ logansargeant this was definitely better
↳ paola_sainz how can you know, you've never actually been to a frat party Logan
↳ oscarpiastri Don't expose him for being fake American
↳ logansargeant Jeez, ganging up on me on July 4th, so not cool 😔
elmatadorf1 god, this is just so cringe 💀
shithappens oh my god those cowboy hats are so cute!
predestined55 why do they even hang out with her? she's acting like she's clinically insane 🙄
charles_leclerc Again, where was the invitation?
↳ paola_sainz Charles, you're not even American? You're Monegasque
↳ charles_leclerc That's clearly doesn't matter?? Only one of you is American!
↳ arthur_leclerc I could be American
↳ paola_sainz Arthur, you can't claim to be French AND American 🙄
↳ charles_leclerc Arthur, we are NOT FRENCH
isawthesainz we will never forget what you did to Carlos! 🐍
↳ prplsector she literally didn't do anything to him???
redleclerc charles loosing his mind in the comments is sending me 💀
↳ 4ND1 poor him, he will never understand Paola's and Arthur's banter lol
logansargeant Again, thank you guys for this. Bringing home a little closer to me for a while ❤️🇺🇲 Happy 4th of July everyone
↳ paola_sainz we're all American for 4th of July
↳ oscarpiastri It's mostly all about the food
sheilaxtay is she even American?
↳ lightning_enjyr she's Spanish
↳ sheilaxtay ??? what the hell
↳ lightning_enjyr Logan is the only American on the grid, she's always celebrated with him so he's not alone
↳ STARG3N i don't understand how can people not like her, she's so sweet 😭
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⟶ POST RACE INTERVIEW WITH OSCAR PIASTRI AND CARLOS SAINZ! PLAY | IGNORE
paola's messages:
HUNGARY 2024
paola's messages:
screamingmeals posted new instagram stories!
caption: Let's go Hungary! Join us on twitch to watch the race with us and our special guest paola_sainz!
paola_sainz posted new instagram stories!
caption 1: come listen to our nonsense commentary of the Hungarian gp on the screamingmeals twitch chanel ;)
caption 2: OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD???! WHAT THE FUCKKKK
caption 3: ¡Vamos Ozzie! you deserve this so much oh my god this is absolutely glorious! I am so proud oscarpiastri
⟶ charles_leclerc replied to your story!
charles_leclerc Oh my god you are SO whipped
paola_sainz I am so telling Alex you said that 🙄
charles_leclerc No please
❝¡Vamos, vamos! Oscar, come on! Oh my God! I think I'm gonna faint," she hid her face in her shaking hands, "tell me when it's over. God I haven't been this stressed since it was me in the car I think."
Next to her James and Clement exchanged looks laughing quietly.
"Don't worry," the Formula 2 driver ruffled her hair, "we'll let you know when he rounds the last corner so you don't miss it."
"Gracias," Paola rolled her eyes and pushed his hands away. "Mate stop, you're messing it up."
"Aw, don't be like that," Clement reached his hands out again, trying to mess with her hair more, but Paola dodged his attempts. The two started pushing each other off the couch until James stepped in and sat inbetween them.
"Also, for everyone watching us here on twitch, she's a dirty liar," Clem said, peaking out from where he sat behind James, after they both calmed down a little.
"I am not mate, what the hell?" Paola exclaimed, obviously appalled. "When have I lied?"
"Just now actually," the driver smirked.
"I might have to agree with Clem here," James looked between the two with amusement. "You? Stressed in a car? Never."
"Yeah, so don't go saying that this is almost as stressful now," Clem showed her from behind James, causing the man in the middle to look into the camera with a pained expression. All while mouthing 'just like children' to the great amusement of the fans watching the interaction. "Actually, I don't think I've ever seen you this stressed before."
"Maybe," Paola's cheeks quickly started resembling the famous Rosso Corsa. "But it's Oscar," she said after few seconds.
"Yeah, it's Oscar," James smiled softly at her, some of the amusement still twinkling in his eyes.
"And he's taking that Mclaren to the top step of the podium! The Australian driver advances all the way to that checkqyerd flag, Oscar Piastri wins for the first time in Formula One! It's a Mclaren 1-2-"
Paola couldn't hear anything thing else, the commentator's voice slowly fading into blissful silence while she watched Oscar cross the finish line in firs place. Right next to her Clement and James were cheering and jumping around but she paid them no mind for the time being. She could've been crying for all she knew, but it didn't matter. None of it mattered. Oscar was a Formula 1 race winner.
"Dios mío," she said quietly into her hands, eyes locked in on the car number 81, she couldn't miss even a second of this.
Paola always knew Oscar would win. He was born a winner, it was only a matter of time before he took the Formula 1 world by storm. She had no doubts that he'd stand among the World Champions one day, right there in the spotlight where he belongs. She just... Well, at a time she was also convinced she'd be standing right there with him. Over the years the vision changed. Oscar was always meant for greatness, but her? She was forced to step into the shadows, take the reality head on and manage her expectations accordingly. So that's exactly what she did. In her mind, it was no longer her and Oscar standing on the top steps together, but she was always there. Looking up at him with tears of joy in her eyes. And that's how it was supposed to be.
She was supposed to be there.
But now she wasn't.
It was Oscar's, Oscar's, first win and she... She wasn't there. Instead she was in the UK, with Clement and James livestreaming from her living room. It's not that she didn't like the guys, they were amazing and watching the race with them was actually fun, but-
She was supposed to be with Oscar.
"Excuse me for a minute guys," she laughed weakly, despair flowing through her like a raging river, leaking out of her along with the tears falling steadily from her eyes. "I'll be right back, just need to catch my breath and make a quick phone call."
As she left the room the cheers form the dingy laptop speakers only seemed to grow louder.
It must've been time for the podium celebrations. ❞
liked by oscarpiastri, jensonbutton and others
paola_sainz oh my god??? someone better tell this guy that I used to drive circles around on track that he's a damn formula 1 race winner now what the hell??
no, in all seriousness now, Oscar, I am so proud of you! From the moment I saw you on that track at 11 years old, I knew you were destined for greatness. It was like there was a sign hanging over your head - "watch out for me, I am the future" - and since that day, you prove that I was right every single day. Everyone knows now that someday you WILL stand among the greatest. I just hope that when you do, I'll be there to cheer you on and ugly cry with your mom. Enjoy this one Osc, you 100% deserved it!
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charles_leclerc I did not get a post like that for my first Ferrari win, favouritism at it's best
↳ paola_sainz yeah well, I was also there when you got your first win in rosso corsa, you got the live version 🙄
shithappens i am sobbing on my bedroom floor what the fuck
prema_team Our Oscar is a Formula 1 race winner!
↳ paola_sainz hell yeah he is admin
prplsector this is too much i can't- 😭
cuddlyxricc this just feels condescending?? wym "the guy i used to drive circles around on track", it's just mean?
barbiegirl mate, it's clearly a joke?? did you not see the whole fucking paragraph underneath?
oui_lyanne i am starting to see your point jordie lightning_enjyr
↳ lightning_enjyr i TOLD you, this is like way above friendship level
fastkiwi oh my god i am so mad that she couldn't attend the race 😭 fia when i catch you
lightning_enjyr it's just so devastating that she missed his first win because of some petty drama her own brother is trying to cause
catstri oh my god those pictures 💀
oscarpiastri I am not going anywhere without you, the top step doesn't feel as high when I look down and you're not there
↳ L3CH41R oh that is bold statement my man
↳ 4ND1 this on main? damn
↳ papayamonique didn't he just confirm that he has a girlfriend? this seems not cool, I'd definitely be jealous if I was her
↳ L3CH41R mate c'mon 😶
jensonbutton Celebratory dinner at our place when you get back oscarpiastri you deserve it man, congratulations
↳ oscarpiastri Thank you Jenson, it means a lot
↳ paola_sainz 🧡
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paola's messages:
madi's radio: if the end feels rushed, it's because me and the 30 photo limit do not like each other and i greatly underestimated how long this part was gonna be (and i already had to cut it into two)
click here to be added to the hiding in the seams taglist!
taglist: @blushmimi @Ale-522 @joalslibrary @jaydaaasworld @vroomvroommuppett @sugarhoneylemons @formulaonebuff @clove0 @rockyhayzkid @glitzyditzy @coriyaps @irishmanwhore @gr3yhues @kikiki04 @fall-bambi @nichmeddar @sunfairyy @formulaal @marauders-wife @theseus-jpg @heavy-vettel @anxxiousaries @linaversion @gloriousmoneyrascalbiscuit @d3kstar @camelliaflow3r @delululeclerc @lesliiieeeee @gaviymarcsbride @solidalibi @fernandoswarcrimes @asteriajaye @spilled-coffee-cup @ouiouibaguettei @Scott-McCall-could-lift-mjolnir @lady-bennet @kittylolly4 @ST4RSHINE @warrensluvr @asparklysoul @sharllleclerc @charllleclerc @sheridamn @thewannabewriter @justjessieslife @back-on-my-bullsh @Scarlettwidow3000 @Idkiwantchocolatee @olivyamarvelgirl @antrenix
xxx - couldn't tag you
DISCLAIMER: i do not know anything about this people, this is not real life, this is just something for fun, i do not know anythings about their life or personalities!
#f1 smau#f1#f1 instagram au#for fun#ferrari#oscar piastri social media au#oscar piastri smau#oscar piastri#mclaren f1#oscar piastri x oc
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