#sorry if someone Has posted this already LMAO i’m not trying to copy it’s not exactly the most original joke

[macabre-crab]

seasmoke smelling addam’s velaryon blood: close enough, welcome back laenor.

[fortemelody]

I'm bored so imma send an ask but what are your Amy Rose headcanons?

HI HELLO IM SORRY THIS IS SO LATE!! i didn’t know how to answer it and then i got busy and then i forgot but i’m here now!

and tbh i still don’t entirely know how to answer it becus im not someone who makes headcannons very often. i usually just see some on my feed and be like “oh yeah that’s so them” and then immediately forget about it LMAO but i do have a couple even tho they are a bit basic and so i’ll try to describe those few in as great detail as possible

knuckles and amy are sibling 100%. they have that dynamic for sure! they train together and they tease each other. amy’s in the small demographic of few people he trusts too. many have also pointed out that they look similar and some people hc her as part echidna which im not really opposed to either

amy and shadow are definitely besties. whenever sonic is too stubborn to do “girly” things such as try on makeup for example, shadow would do that with her instead. he doesn’t care about his public image unlike sonic. music is something that brings them together too, seeing as we already know that they’re both swifties and went to hot honey! and she was the one who brought him back to his senses in the ending of SA2 (which btw im praying that the third movie has that scene aughdkftk). shadow has a clear soft spot for her that can only be brought out by amy. i feel like the next follow up question would be if i ship them and the answer is…not really?! i think it would be a situation where maybe amy is a bit touchy at times without realizing it and shadow blushes, or shadow does stuff to make sonic jealous (to clarify them hanging out in general is purely becus shadow wants to -not just an act so he can get back at sonic- but i think it would be funny if he would take the opportunity to brag about it when sonic gets on his nerves). i do not think either of them would actually date tho even with these one off situations and they are way better as platonic besties fr ong ‼️

this one is a bit random but i’ve always thought of amy being like… a starbucks addicted girly (in the world of mobius- not irl where they could possibly be funding a genocide 😭). and it’s kinda an ironic thing in my mind. yes, she’s the least ordinary girl you could get: wields a giant hammer, incredibly strong, is hyperfixated on and can use tarot cards as weapons, and has an indescribable intuition. however, calling back to the events of SA1, she really is just a normal hedgehog at the end of the day trying to lead a normal life. she had to learn all of these attributes, she wasn’t really born with an ability like the rest of team sonic. she also lived in an apartment for part of sonic x (i think?? haven’t watched the full series and i don’t remember everything) and actually liked it. so i think she would really enjoy simple more earth like customs. i think she honestly might be embarrassed of this fact too, seeing as she’s come all this way in her life just to resort to her old ways of living.

(…okay i’m gonna be honest that last one was a bit of a stretch and it originated from me and my friend calling her a basic white girl at one point as a joke LMAO but then i thought more about it and it kinda made sense once i put it into context)

the last one is a concept i kinda stole from a comic i saw a long time ago (i have no idea of the username- but if someone does lemme know). it was the idea that sonic started liking amy once she had started to move on, how the “chasing” kinda switched roles, and after she dialed down her “fangirling”. how sonic now wants her to be obsessed after she’s made so much progress in being her own person. i kinda wrote a fanfic based off of this and expanded upon my interpretation of it through amy’s POV. although i never posted it, i think the words i chose still capture it well so i’m just gonna copy and paste that:

“When Amy started to slowly change her childish and obnoxious mannerisms towards Sonic, he immediately felt more comfortable around her, and even started subtly reciprocating his feelings to her. Amy was obviously maturing no doubt about it, but she felt as if she had lost a part of herself in doing so. That side of her that would boldly protect and proclaim her love to him. That side to her that wouldn’t stop until she got her way. That side of her that was, as Jewel stated “…constantly following him”. She felt as if she had given up so much of her personality just to feel less incomplete, to have that soulmate she always dreamed about. On top of that, Sonic loved to come and go as he pleases. She knows that he was always going to be the adventuring type, but she wish more often that he would make an effort to chat or to invite her to tag along. Chaos knows when she tries to plan anything with him, she’s too paranoid for her own good, wondering if he’ll instantly interpret it as a date and chicken out.”

-different scene-

“Amy was surely blushing before, but nothing could’ve prepared her for that statement. She felt her heart beating, no, throbbing out of control. She looked like a full on tomato now. It’s always been her dream to dance with Sonic, but in the past he always ran away, so she gave up after several attempts. But this was the “new” her. He liked the “new” her, apparently enough to dance with him.”

(ik a lot of this doesn’t make sense without more context but uhhh this is getting too long already so if you wanna know details just DM me ig 💀)

and if it wasn’t obvious already- i take a lot of what is said in the twitter takeovers, tailstube, and idw comics to heart becus i think they have the most genuine and interesting versions of these characters and tell us about small details that we wouldn’t otherwise know. i not only make this info my hcs but also like to expand upon them and use them in my evidence- so that’s what most of the things i said above are referencing.

sooo yeah i think that’s all i got. sorry i guess a lot of these were more about dynamics of character interactions rather than amy herself… i hope that’s okay! tysm anon this was a lotta fun to answer and i hope to get more of these types of questions!!

[chromotps]

The thing about Ace/Sabo is that the ship is less about them being brothers but more like them sharing a childhood friendship? That had the potential of becoming something more in the future. Except it didn’t, for obvious reasons. And yeah not everyone’s a fan of that, but people also like the raised by wolves/son of a noble dynamic they had as children. While I agree Sabo does kind of feel like he was stuck to Ace&Luffy as an afterthought, with a piece of chewed-out gum — his existence doesn’t… I don’t know, feel out of place? I also enjoy how kinda tragic his character is, and how he carries that tragedy with him? In the form of Ace’s devil fruit (Sabo also canonically hallucinates and there was an instance where he admitted to hearing Ace’s voice, during his fight with Burgess? so yeah, not everyone’s cup of tea again but I’m a huge fan of hurt/comfort so having a character go through a psychotic depressive episode because of the insane guilt he feels? Just, yeah. Plus there’s something really poetic about him literally eating Ace’s DF and still considering it „Ace’s powers” etc) and the way I see Sabo/Lu is through Ace/Lu (and partially Ace/Sabo) anyway. Because Sabo is trying to fill out the role of an older brother/friend for Luffy that he’s well aware is impossible to fill — because nothing ever will be the same for Luffy. Nothing or no one could even come close to making it up for Ace’s loss to Luffy, and Sabo knows he’s kind of a cheap copy of that (figuratively and literally lmfao, as I know people have been calling him low-budget Ace), but still he tries to? And the fact that Luffy is technically his only remaining family (or at least someone he willingly considers family). And I kind of see it as a parallel to how Ace’s approach to Luffy changed after Sabo’s „death”? Because Sabo was the „kinder” brother, the nicer one, the smarter one, it was usually him who took Luffy’s side whenever Ace was annoyed with him? And the one who explicitly asked Ace to look after Luffy — which then was one of the direct reasons why Ace changed the way he treated Luffy, forced him to be more patient/learn to love and eventually led to Ace willingly becoming the „older brother” figure for Luffy. I’m in no way trying to convince you to like Sabo, don’t get me wrong!! I’m just trying to show an example how Ace/Sabo isn’t necessarily brotherly either (like, I don’t know, Sabo/Luffy seems to be?). And it’s just that while I’m first and foremost a huge Ace/Lu enjoyer I also think Sabo did have a significant impact on their relationship both before and after Ace’s death.

((!! sorry i took a while to reply! i made that post before work on Friday and then got slammed until just now fdghjgk)

the odd thing is, I mostly agree!! I think I had to vent bc i saw ppl (a few specific sabo fans haha) on twitter acting like luffy would feel nothing toward ace but be obsessed with sabo. and, lol, no. but what YOU said makes total sense. like, yes, Ace + Sabo definitely has a different, more involved feeling to me than Ace & Luffy. I've had some ships in the past that fit the raised by wolves/runaway noble trope... the charm of the noble feeling like "this is the only person I feel like I can really be myself around" and the wild one thinking "i like spending time with this noble—they're tougher/kinder/funnier than i gave them credit for" AND/OR "society has always rejected me, but this 'cultured' person accepting me heals that pain a little bit"—all of those things are really charming.

Maybe if we'd seen more about how ace and sabo became friends, or if there were more emphasis on sabo's acceptance being what helped ace's anger (instead of, just from how i saw things, it being mostly luffy's unconditional warmth toward ace that did it?) then I'd personally be more feral about that dynamic, haha. But it's like you said, I guess it all depends on what we each connect with. I dont find tragedy alone compelling... I'm depressed enough already as it is LMAO!! if I think too hard about how viscerally sad Sabo only remembering Ace after he'd died is, my brain just shuts down. But I've got really good friends who would EAT THAT UP. Like, yeah, it is beautifully poetic... hahaha now i'm laughing thinking about my friends who were really into Hamlet and Romeo & Juliet finding out about Sabo & Ace and being obsessed, ahaha (they're not so into One Piece tho, only jjk... at least, for now!! 😈)

it's hard to put into words, but there's something about Sabo being a revolutionary vs. ace and luffy being pirates, that kind of explains why my brain sees A+L as very very very different than A&S or L&S. But like, that's just my brain and how my heart likes to focus on characters with really codependent relationships/dreams/themes, hahaha...

[eight-years-revolution]

Chill Twine Tips

Hello! I know a lot of people are trying to learn Twine at the moment and sometimes it can feel overwhelming. I get it, I’m like that too, lol. When I started learning Twine I looked at the Harlowe documentation and my eyes glazed over and my brain was emptied of all thoughts. I found it so hard to understand. And I still do and barely use it lmao.

So what do I do instead? (The answer is below the cut because it’s a little long which kinda defeats the purpose, sorry!)

1 - Googling things!

I know it may sound condescending and passive-aggressive, but I’m saying it with love. Googling things (or using the search engine of your choice) allows you to find specifically how to do a thing you want to do without having the first clue what the name of the functionality is in Twine.

I have no formal training in coding, I don’t know the jargon very well (which is another reason the documentation is hard to read for me), and English not being my native language doesn’t help either.

So I just google “how to do XYZ in Twine Harlowe/Sugarcube” and there’s a good chance that someone, somewhere has asked the same question before. If not, maybe a question that is similar and the answer might be useful in figuring out what you need to do.

By googling things, I came across other resources that are very helpful!

2 - Twine forums and the Twine subreddit

I’m pretty sure people have mentioned those before, but I think a little reminder can’t hurt. When you can’t find the answer to your question by googling, you can ask it on the Twine forums or on the Twine subreddit. There are people there who are happy to help and I find it more polite to post an open question on a platform like those so that anyone who has time and feels like answering will come to help you. These platforms are made specifically for that, so don’t hesitate to use them!

3 - Video tutorials

Focusing on reading documentation and tutorials can be hard for some people (that’s me, I’m some people). In that case, it can be sometimes easier to listen to instructions and videos can provide explicit visual examples.

While learning Twine, I came across this Youtube channel which has helped me a lot with understanding various functionalities. I find being able to see both the code in the Twine editor and the result in a browser very helpful to understand what does what and how.

4 - Bite-size learning

You don’t need to learn all of Twine at once! You don’t need to have a wonderful, intricate UI right out of the gate, you don’t need to have complex gameplay elements right away to get started. I find it helpful to start simple and to build on that simple base progressively as I learn new things. I just learn one thing at a time, use it, experiment with it, see how far I can take it before I start learning something new when I find that I need it.

That’s also why I don’t really use templates as… well templates lmao. I use them as more of a reference. If you’re a beginner, starting with a template might be overwhelming. I find it easier to start with a blank game and add features from the template one by one. That way you understand what each element actually does, what it changes in your game. And if you understand it, you’ll be better equipped to customize it for your game.

5 - Looking at other people’s code

Okay, this one might be a little more controversial lol. Some authors prefer to not have their game downloadable and would rather people don’t look at their code and that’s understandable! Sometimes there can be spoilers in the code and sometimes the author doesn’t want people to simply copy-paste something they worked hard on.

But to be frank with you, I’ve learned a lot from looking at other people’s code and I would have had a much harder time understanding how to do some things without concrete examples. The idea is to look at how they did something and replicate it (not copy-pasting).

If the author has not already stated they’re fine with you looking at their code, ask them if it’s alright! If you want to look at mine, you have my explicit permission, lol. Of course, I use Harlowe, so it might not be of interest to many people. Also, some of my notes in the css and javascript are in French, my bad, lol.

That’s about it! I know there are a lot of resources out there, a lot of helpful blogs with more detailed help, but I felt like a few tips to take things easy and slow could be helpful!

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 308: VIBE: CHECKED

Previously on BnHA: Lots and lots of Shindou idk what else to tell you.

Today on BnHA: Tired Nomad Deku rescues Shindou from Muscular, and us from Shindou. Muscular is all “OH BOY I SURE CAN’T WAIT TO FIGHT DEKU AGAIN AFTER HE TOTALLY KICKED MY ASS THE LAST TIME!! I’M SURE THIS TIME WILL GO DIFFERENTLY SEEING AS HE’S HAD ALMOST AN ENTIRE YEAR’S WORTH OF ADDITIONAL TRAINING, AND ALSO HAS SIX FOURQUIRKS NOW, IN ADDITION TO THE CONFIDENCE THAT COMES WITH HAVING EIGHT OTHER PEOPLE’S SOULS CHILLING OUT INSIDE HIM OFFERING MORAL SUPPORT AND ENCOURAGEMENT.” Deku is all, “[kicks Muscular’s ass effortlessly].” Muscular is all, “[gets his ass totally kicked].” I for one am very satisfied with this, and with respect to all, I would like to hereby declare this post a discourse-free zone. I’m just happy to see my son out here making good use of his FOURQUIRKS, and more importantly beating Muscular in less than seventeen pages so we can all go on with our lives lol.

damn Deku since when were you allowed to look this cool

from this perspective and with the smoke, cape, backpack, and mask more or less obscuring his actual profile, he looks less like a sixteen-year-old boy and more like a grownass man

OH SNAP

we got a glimpse of this in the cleaned-up scan of 307, but seeing both of his eyes looking so distinctively All Might-esque here is... whoa. I mean we know that his face still looks pretty normal underneath the mask and he doesn’t actually have the black sclera, but still, this is an awesome look. mini-Might

lol Muscular

you and me both. I mean no offense, but yeah

so Deku is just standing there silently

typical Deku. tight-lipped and expressionless. mum’s the word. quiet as a mouse. silent as a grave

okay no but seriously this is so weird and creepy though you guys. Deku please say something or else I’m just gonna mindlessly say whatever stupid things come into my head in an effort to make things less awkward

so Muscular is all “I should probably make a cool speech about revenge but Horikoshi couldn’t think of anything good so I’m just going to stand here clenching my fist real slowly”

“I’m not here to go on a monologue” he says, as he monologues about not monologuing

okay you guys I confess I have only read through/watched the Deku VS Muscular fight once because the arm-breaking is just way too uncomfortable for me to revisit. and so as a result, I have completely forgotten Whatever The Deal Is with Muscular’s eye lmao so let me go look it up real quick

okay so it’s a prosthetic, obviously, and he changes it out according to his mood. that part does sound familiar. I just can’t remember which eye is supposed to indicate which mood. don’t tell me I actually have to go back and reread this shit

lol I’m skimming through chapter 75 now and remembering/realizing that I hardly paid any attention to this the first time around because as soon as I found out the villains were after Kacchan my brain was like “TIME TO FOCUS ON THIS AND ONLY THIS NOW AND FOREVER” and yeah. ah memories

anyway so he started out with the flower-looking eye, and then later on he was all

which begs the question, how on earth could I have ever forgotten the most ridiculous panel I’ve ever read lmao

anyway, but so after all of that, I'm only just now realizing that this isn't one of his previous eye prosthetics in the current chapter; this is an ACTUAL FUCKING ROCK that he's just randomly shoved into his eye socket fkdsjlk

so basically (1) I did all of that painstaking research for nothing, five whole minutes of my life wasted THANKS A LOT, and (2) what, and I have never meant this more emphatically, THE FUCK

anyway so now he's leaping at the building that Deku is standing on top of. but he’s not aiming anywhere near Deku though, wtf

(ETA: HAHA YOU BROKE ALL YOUR MUSCLES YOU LOSER.)

...huh

lmao okay then. I hope those annoying citizens in the building next door are watching this go down and rethinking their life choices

dlkdkljk

just keep standing there pressed right up against the window, why don’t you. “WHAT’S GOING ON THIS SUPER CLOSE COLLAPSING BUILDING IS BLOCKING OUR VIEW.” well, folks, we’ve long since known there’s a critical shortage of hero and villain brain cells, but what we’re learning now is that civilian brain cells are also in short supply

OH THANK GOD DEKU IS FINALLY TALKING THAT WAS ACTUALLY UNSETTLING AS FUCK

SO HE’S STILL OUR GOOD, POLITE, WORRIED, CONSIDERATE DEKU UNDERNEATH THAT COOL AND MYSTERIOUS VENEER. for real, thank fuck, because I swear to god if he suddenly started acting like the Dekus in all of the vigilante AUs my interest in this series would have dropped something like 50% lol. just because he dropped out of school and ran away from home and is currently dressed like the physical manifestation of a Linkin Park playlist doesn’t mean he’s not still the WORLD’S BIGGEST DORK okay

I MEAN, THIS RIGHT HERE. THIS IS WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT. HE’S APOLOGIZING FOR THE DELAY

PLEASE FIND THE ATTACHED SHINDOU YOU REQUESTED. BEST REGARDS!!!

OH MY GOD WHY IS HE SUCH A BADASS

something about making bold, confident statements while obscured in smoke?? idk but damn it fucking works

ffjkkl

more importantly, should you tell him you actually need your copy of Shindou in excel format and not pdf?? on the one hand you don’t want to sound ungrateful, but on the other hand what are you even supposed to do with this

this chapter so far consists of like 50% smoke, but on the other hand Deku VS Kacchan 2 had a lot of cinematic smoke too so who am I to complain

OMG IS IT HIS ARMS

IDK DID YOU?! TELL ME YOUR SECRETS. PLEASE, AT SOME POINT THIS FIGHT HAS GOT TO ACTUALLY ADVANCE THE PLOT

OHHHHHHH

IT’S EN’S QUIRK!! OH MY GOD OKAY THAT’S ACTUALLY AWESOME

I CAN HEAR THE SOUND OF DISCOURSE RUMBLING IN THE BACKGROUND BUT I DON’T CARE LOL. WON’T CATCH ME EVER SAYING NO TO ANOTHER SIXQUIRK. GO AHEAD, BRING THEM ON, I WANT TO SEE THEM ALL but take it easy though Deku. don’t want to give yourself lung cancer or anything

also it’s good to see that in a very real sense he’s not fighting alone. the Vestiges really did mean it when they said they could appear more easily now. this is on a whole other level

so is this whole next page still En talking, or someone else? because whoever it is sure is chatty

okay, several things

pretty sure it is En, because he keeps saying “I suppose.” for someone who never said two words until one page ago, this guy sure never shuts up. we can’t all follow Muscular’s lead I suppose. oh my god now I’m doing it too

really like the suggestion of Deku using the SIXQUIRKS like tools in an arsenal, because that’s what he’s good at! it’s almost like he’s been training for this his entire life. “you value quirks too much” LOOK HE JUST THINKS THEY’RE COOL OKAY IS THAT A CRIME

where the fuck did all this rope come from

not gonna ask what the fuck that thing is sticking out from the back of his utility belt. Horikoshi will surely explain this

is that a fucking jetpack. I’m sorry Deku were six fucking quirks not enough for you. you can fucking float??? but JUST TO BE SAFE, LET’S STRAP A PAIR OF ROCKETS TO OUR SHOULDERS IDK

-- or wait, is this all supposed to be like a visual representation of En’s metaphor?? OH MY GOD AM I JUST STUPID LOL, DON’T ANSWER THAT. NEVER MIND. NEW LIST!!

rope = blackwhip

jetpack = float

radio = danger sense

and so I’m guessing that this ridiculously phallic thing is supposed to be a flare or something?? and that = the new quirk, smokescreen. well that was a fucking ride lmao we now return you to our regularly scheduled chapter

so now Deku is floating to his heart’s content and thinking that he’ll just sneak up on Muscular and vibe check his ass or whatever

WOOOOOOOO DANGER SENSE YESSSS I LOVE THIS FOR HIM

okay guys, I'm gonna press pause here for a sec to make a serious note, because I am loving the shit out of this, but tbh I'm having trouble enjoying it as much as I want to because I keep getting anxious thinking about the discourse. I know that a lot of the fandom has very strong opinions on Deku's character development one way or the other, and I want to respect that. but I also really have no spoons to debate this topic at all beyond what I’ve already weighed in on. so if it’s all the same to everyone, I plan on staying out of this discussion, at least this week

anyway! that said, YEAH BOI GET HIS ASS

VIBE: CHECKED. CURB: STOMPED. HOTEL: TRIVAGO

-- OF COURSE HE’S STILL FUCKING FINE LOL HE CRASHES INTO BUILDINGS FOR FUN IDK WHAT I WAS EXPECTING

dammit Muscular. how many fucking quirks does it take to beat you?! the annoying thing is that even with all of his cool new powers, Deku is still something of a mismatch against him. anyway r.i.p. to all these poor buildings

OOOOOHHHHH

you guys have no idea how intrigued I am at the prospect of watching Deku try to play both good cop and bad cop here lmao

anyway so Muscular says he doesn’t know, go figure

“I’m not here to make small talk or anything” he says as he small talks about not small talking

OH MY GOD DEKU

are you really gonna talk no jutsu all of these villains from now on?? that last battle really did have a profound impact on you, huh! interesting

you guys he’s really doing it omg

Deku this guy tried to murder a five-year-old literally just for fun. I mean more power to you, but holy shit you’re really gonna try to defeat Muscular with anger management therapy huh

I MEAN

WHO COULD HAVE SEEN THAT RESPONSE COMING dlkjslkjk

FUCK’S SAKE DEKU, I KNOW YOU MEAN WELL BUT THEY CAN’T ALL HAVE TRAGIC PASTS KIDDO

but. I have to admit, I do still like that he tried. probably knew just as well as we did what the end result was going to be, but still. he made the effort in good faith and I respect that

uh oh

why do I get the feeling Muscular just got a whole lot deader

oh my god oh my god he’s doing the “powering up” stance ffff don’t fucking tell me you can still use your fucking arms here, Deku

BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY WHAT’S THIS??

okay so basically he’s saying that whatever it was he sensed in Tomura, he doesn’t sense from Muscular. which, yeah, that sounds exactly right. good judge of character here lol

AHHHHAHAHA YESS

WHOOPS, GET FUCKED I GUESS

WOOOOHOOOOOOOO

lmao so apparently this is the belated result of Shindou’s attack from chapter 307?? I’ll be damned. good for you Shindou!! I always liked you buddy. please just take my word on that and don’t fact check that statement

okay lol the one tiny bit of discourse I will allow is that it’s bullshit that he just did that with his right arm. like, I’ll fully acknowledge that. that makes no fucking sense, and I demand an explanation from the Great Plot Hole Filler himself. he’s never let us down before when it comes to continuity so I’m trusting him not to suddenly start now

that said, we love to see a rematch against a boring guy settled quickly and decisively within the span of a single chapter. THANK YOU

I like that Deku implies that his power is being a smart nerd who battles villains using the power of ANALYTICS. he basically didn’t do anything except restrain Muscular and wait for Shindou’s attack to take effect while halfheartedly checking to see if he regretted any of that murder and stuff

(ETA: and almost forgot to mention, he made excellent use of all four of his active SIXQUIRKS. it’s like the chapter title said; this is basically him fighting all-out, and it’s a sight to see.)

also, as cool as the mask was, this just feels right. like, we had our fun, now let us see his face, yes good

anyway, I think this was a good start towards establishing What’s Up With Deku Right Now! so if it’s all the same to Horikoshi, I would next like to take some time to explore Why’s Up With Deku. that, and What’s Up With Everyone Else, Especially Kacchan. por favor

[stansupremacy]

SURPRISE — CHRIS EVANS X READER ONE SHOT FLUFF

[NOTE] English is not my first language, sorry for the mistakes. Very excited to share this story with you, I originally posted it on wattpad, but it was really frustrating to note that it didn't seem to attract attention. Let's not focus on that, but on the now, new beginnings in Tumbrl (I still don't know how works lmao)

[COPYRIGHT] All rights reserved, copying or adaptation of the novel without prior notice to the author is PROHIBITED.

Traveling the world with a six-month-old was not an easy job, but you took the risk.

Chris was turning 40, you flatly refused to spend that special day away from him.

They were both actors, so their schedules were always very tight. Unfortunately, the idea of ​​the surprise party with the whole family in Boston had been completely scrapped because Chris was filming in France for his next project and you were in Canada giving a press conference promoting your new movie.

The chances of celebrating her birthday together had been reduced to zero, worse you being the stubborn woman you are, you did not give your arm to twist. So after several fights with your representative and several scolding from your personal assistant for having disorganized your entire schedule. You had managed to escape for seven days, so that you and your daughter could surprise her father on her birthday.

You knew there was no better gift than to take Luna to her father, it had been a few long weeks since they last saw each other. Separating from his daughter was something that destroyed Chris, it had been a very difficult decision, but being a sensitive one. Luna had to be with you, she was breastfeeding, she couldn't be away from you for long.

After two plans, more than 16 hours of travel and a lot of stress, they had reached their destination. Paris Charles de Gaulle airport. The first part of the plan was complete, without wasting time, you settled Luna in her baby carrier on your chest, she cried in protest, she wanted to keep looking around her.

"I know, I know honey ... But you have to understand, mommy can't carry you in her arms, she has to carry the luggage" you murmured kissing her little head. You took the two suitcases and without wasting time you left the airport.

Luna had started to fidget, you understood her. The journey had been long, the two of them urgently needed rest. "Honey ... It was a short time, we just have to wait for Uncle Scott to come pick up us and we can go to sleep, preferably in Daddy's arms."

You took the phone from your backpack unlocking it to enter the chat with Scott, you sent the location and put it back in your pocket, without holding on any longer, you took off your chinstrap, a sigh of satisfaction left your lips when you felt the fresh air on your expensive. You removed little Evans from the carrier baby when you noticed that she kept complaining. Her small and expressive blue eyes looked around curiously.

"Do you need a ride?" A car pulled up on the street in front of you, the driver's window opened revealing Scott's face.

"Finally!" You exclaimed, he laugh getting out of the car, his arms wrapped around you affectively I returned the gesture for a few seconds.

Luna stretched her arms as she recognized her uncle waiting to be carried. Scott did not doubt it, and took her in his arms as he helped you store your bags in the trunk of the car.

You opened the back door, to throw your backpack there before entering and stretch your arms towards your daughter, who hesitating for a few seconds, accepted the change of arms.

"Sorry for the delay, your boyfriend is a pain in my ass. He asked me a thousand questions trying to figure out where I was going" Scott commented making sure the door is closed, he walked around the car and got back on as pilot, beginning to lead. "Tired?

"You have no idea" you sigh closing your eyes, a small smile adorns your lips knowing that they had achieved it, they would see Chris. "I swear that this is the only time that I cross half the world alone with a baby, next time I will bring someone to help me."

"Well, they are here, that's the important thing"

"Yeah, you're right." You answered, you look Luna who was beginning to close her eyes, it seemed that the dream was beginning to overcome her, you rock her lightly by kissing her plump cheek

[...]

Luna played entertainingly with the TV remote while you circled the hotel room, eager to see Chris.

You had to turn off your phone because he had not stopped calling and sending messages, your last message to him had been minutes before boarding, telling him that you were going to take a nap. More than 20 hours have already passed, so it was normal for him to worry, but you had decided not to answer him, it was not in your plans to ruin the surprise.

The clock said twelve o'clock at night, officially it was Chris's birthday, who should arrive at any moment.

Half an hour later, a message from Scott warning that he has already arrived at the hotel was what got you going. The suitcases were in Scott's room because if Chris came to see them he would instantly notice that they were there, you took your girl out of bed and ran to the bathroom but not before turning off all the lights.

Seconds after closing the door, the room door was heard opening. Chris's voice and Scott's laugh reached your ears.

"Don't laugh, idiot, this is serious. Y/N doesn't answer me, I think she's angry, but I don't know what I did." Scott made fun of his brother again, you smiled amused when you heard Chris's concern about the lack of messages. Luna, taking advantage of the fact that they were near the shower ledge, took a bottle of shampoo to drop it, making a great bang.

"Luna, you give away our position! You whispered indignantly, mini Evans babbling in amusement.

The door slammed open revealing a surprised Chris. Scott came in behind him, recording the reunion.

"Surprise!" You exclaimed, Luna shouted excitedly when she recognized her father. Chris wasting no time, drew them into a hug. "Luna and I decided that Daddy couldn't spend his 40th birthday away from us, right sweetheart?" The baby smiled stretching her hands to touch her father's face.

"Oh my girls, I missed you so much" Chris sighed still without letting go of the hug, he placed a kiss on Luna's forehead before turning her face and kissing you tenderly on the lips.

"Happy birthday darling, we love you very much, I hope you liked the surprise"

"I couldn't ask for a better thing" he smiled kissing your lips again.

"Don't say that, I have others that I'm sure you will love" you whispered with a mischievous glint in your eyes, Chris smirked. "We must put on day".

"For the love of God, you two are disgusting, talk about sex in front of the baby? Gross" Scott exclaimed in disgust.

Chris chuckled coming out of the bathroom with Luna on his right arm while his left was on your waist. He couldn't think of a better birthday start.

[masterhandss]

Forbidden fruit ask time: Keith x Katarina. I know people in western fandom are understandably wary of this ship, but apparently it's one of the favourites for the Japanese audience and based on what I heard it actually has some decent foundation in novels (not as much as GeoKata, but still). Since you read novels and are #1 hamefura blog on Tumblr and know so much I wanted to ask you to tell us how KeiKata is doing in novels if it's okay owo??

owo!! lmao, I don't know about being the "#1 hamefura blog on tumblr" (I-I... I thought I was an art blog... :')) I mean I just like to ramble about hamefura lmao but I'm always happy to answer questions!

Yeah... Keith x Katarina is a hard subject to talk about considering how violent reactions can be depending on who you're talking to. I remember when Season 1 was airing, people really doesn't like Keith as a romantic option for Katarina due to them being siblings, and I'm honestly waiting for those people to react to the S2 OP and S2 in general. I've talked to a few people who don't like KeiKata at all, and they have the absolute right to dislike any ship that they want, but it did make me sad to know how much Keith is hated by the EN Fandom considering how loved he is in the JP Fandom. He's pretty much the most favorite male character and the second most shipped with Katarina.

-> hamefura x(s2) & ln spoilers ahead <-

A lot of people's issues with Keith stems from the fact that he and Katarina are step-sibling and that it's really weird for Keith to be romantically interested in Katarina (a person who sees him as a little brother completely). People are accusing him of taking advantage of Katarina's trust in him to keep her to himself and that pursuing her romantically would destroy the familial bond that they've had for years. The thing is that Keith treasures Katarina as a person, not as a sibling. Yes, Keith sees her as family, but he also sees her as more than family. To him, being able to be together with Katarina doesn't mean that he'll have to love her differently, but that he will be able to love her even more deeply and honestly. You can even headcanon that the reason Keith calls Katarina "big sister" is because he's asked to do so, and because it's a symbol of his acceptance into the family, but maybe not necessarily how he sees her.

Some of the material that will be covered in Season 2 is about Keith, so I don't know how much I want to talk about that since most fans will be able to see it themselves. Keith has it the hardest because his position makes it so that he's the least likely to get his feelings across to Katarina due to their relationship. In one of the upcoming arcs in the anime, Keith will be able to break Katarina's baka shield in the same way Geordo does: by using actions instead of words, and by just literally finding the courage to take the risk and tell her.

That's where one of the interesting things about hamefura comes into play: one of the reasons why people dislike KeiKata so much is that they feel like the reveal of Keith's feelings would awaken disgust and betrayal in Katarina. Few fanfics of hamefura portray it that way, that Katarina would be weirded out by his feelings and reject them immediately. Maybe it's because Katarina is aware of Keith as not only a sibling, but also as a romance-able character in an otome game (also because of the nature of this series lmao), that in canon, she doesn't take his confession negatively and is flushed/embarrassed by it just like Geordo's confession. I know the "weirded out" reaction is the most realistic, but maybe Katarina also understands that their relationship doesn't have a clear label. They care for each other very much and whether that bond is romantic, familial or friendship isn't something they bothered to really name, maybe? Lmao I don't know, that last bit is just speculation on my part, I can't exactly get into Katarina's head and pinpoint what she thought of Keith's confession.

If I'm being honest, she forgets about Keith's confession more often than she does Geordo, mostly because nothing really changed after he made his feelings clear. I wouldn't say that she dismissed it, it's just that she's forgetting it because in her perspective being loved as a woman and as family by Keith both means that he'll take care of her and shower her with attention (aka no difference).

When I think about how "KeiKata is doing in the novels", for some reason the first thing that comes to my mind is the line "how they treated Geordo in the anime, from a JP perspective". I know that sounds confusing, but what I mean is that a lot of Arc 2 - FL2 scenes with KeiKata is kinda fanservice (aka the thing they tried to do for Geordo in the anime which worked for JP fans but made him hated by the EN fans) (not me trying to insert Geordo in a post about Keith hehe :V). Excluding all the Keith scenes that are coming in Season 2 of the anime and the current arc of the manga, the story really likes to test Keith's self-control when it comes to seeing Katarina as a woman.

Keith's scenes with Katarina aren't necessarily "hot and spicy" by any means, but people nowadays tend to be quite bothered and annoyed at typical japanese romance tropes being played out in modern anime series (such as bed-pining, surprised kisses and kabedons). I mean yeah I'd be bothered too if someone pulled those moves on me in real life, but for the japanese audience this is what their fanservice is like so that's the kind of stuff we'll see in hamefura. Just like Geordo, Keith is given a few scenes where he's put in a romantic spot with Katarina after he confessed, but it always just ends with him backing out and hoping that it at least could remind Katarina of how he sees her (like bed-pinning in LN6 & affectionate touches from Katarina in LN8). A lot of hate towards Keith stems from these scenes because people sees this as a disrespect towards Katarina and the familial relationship they have. These scenes helps reinforce how Keith sees Katarina as a woman and not as a sister, but depending on who you're siding with, you're either gonna be disgusted at Keith or extremely pissed off at Katarina's lack of propriety & density.

Like, people are getting angry at Keith for being a teenage boy who is being bothered by affectionate touches from the girl he likes who is also always approaching him with only a nightgown? I mean blame the author or Keith all you want but at least put some responsibility on Katarina as well :V People are really saying "well, he shouldn't be bot and bothered by it in the first place, they are siblings! that's disgusting!" well again, Keith sees her as a woman and Katarina needs to be aware that she shouldn't be so touchy with the opposite sex regardless if it's family. Keith kinda blames Katarina for the way he feels given how she acts around him despite being unaware of his feelings, which is also the cause of some hatred towards Keith.

People are saying that Keith is dumping *all* the responsibility onto Katarina because she acts in such an affectionate way towards him, but in reality Keith feels really bad & also hates himself for being so attracted to her when she doesn't even know about his feelings. He puts a lot of blame onto himself and thinks he's just as bad as Geordo sometimes (not saying Geordo is bad, more like Keith's "idea of Geordo" being bad lmao). Keith always walks on eggshells around Katarina because he doesn't want to disrespect how he feels about her and how she feels about him. It's just sad to see people hate him for the few moments where his self-control breaks so that he can act on his honest emotion, and accuse him of abusing Katarina's trust :((

Just like Geordo, Keith has made it clear how he feels and strongly desires to pursue her romantically, but his problem of being the step-sibling is still there. I haven't gotten my own copy of JP Volume 10 yet, I feel like I just wanna wait for the EN version instead of using GT, but multiple spoilers have noted that while Keith hasn't made progress in getting approval of his feelings from Katarina's side, he's at least able to get an approval from his family. Well, by that I mean Keith has already confessed his romantic feelings about Katarina to their father Luigi, and he replied by saying that he approves of whoever Katarina chooses for herself. Keith realizes that all he needs to do is get Katarina to return his feelings. When he does, his family wont hate him, but instead he'll be able to love them and be loved in the same, yet different way.

TLDR; a lot has happened to Keith throughout the light novels. He's progressing slowly and steadily just like Geordo, and is leagues ahead compared to the other characters. He has confessed his feelings and got reassurance of his relationship with his parents. Keith and Katarina's relationship itself hasn't really changed though, but it's nice to know that Keith is at least laying the foundations for his hypothetical future with her. Katarina doesn't really think about Keith enough to be able to tell how she feels about his confession or if her opinion on him has changed at all though, so take that as either an L or a W for Keith.

Thank you for the ask! I'm sorry if this isn't as elaborate as you wanted, anon. I like Keith and Katarina but I guess it's because they aren't my bias that I don't pay too much attention to the tiny details of how Keith is written in the books qwq

[thinkingisadangerouspastime]

hi! random question that you’re not obligated to answer (i just love your ka metas): do you think that aang acted like he was entitled to katara’s affection? sorry for the bother if this is a question you’ve gotten before, i’m just curious about your thoughts

Hi anon! It’s always lovely to hear people like my metas 💛 And you’re in luck - I have not gotten this specific question before, though I have answered similar questions, and as such I will probably link those posts throughout.

Forewarning: I use the general you very liberally in this post, so like. It’s not directed at you, anon djhskdjsajs I don’t want you think my sarcasm is in response to your ask (your ask was very lovely!! 💕)

Okay. Let’s get started! The funniest thing about the (nonsensical) claim that Aang acted “entitled” to Katara’s affection is that there is no canon evidence to support it. Opponents more often than not can only bring up one (1) episode as an example of supposed “entitlement” because no other Kataang interactions in the series demonstrate entitlement from either end! Like, wow. Talk about scraping the bottom of the barrel. And I’m sure we all know what episode opponents love to propagate, don’t we?

Yep, you guessed it: “The Ember Island Players.”

From the get-go, the fact that people who vigorously oppose Kataang essentially only appeal to the contents of one episode for Aang’s supposed “entitlement” is a major indicator that, in fact, the entitlement is not truly there, and that those opponents are actually misconstruing the entire episode. I mean, if you are trying to make an argument about something but you only have one piece of “evidence” to support your claim, then a) any half-decent teacher/professor would fail you, rip and b) that’s a sign that maybe your claim doesn’t hold water. If you can’t find evidence to support it, then you’re probably looking at your case from the wrong angle. Analysis 101.

As such, I find the “entitlement” claim particularly ridiculous because opponents repeat the same faulty rhetoric over and over! The only people that might be convinced are those with confirmation bias. I’m sure that’s their audience, of course, but it’s still hilarious dfjaksdasks.

Anyways. Here’s the excerpt from the EIP transcript that opponents l o v e to spotlight with their “entitlement” claims:

Aang: Katara, did you really mean what you said in there?

Katara: In where? What are you talking about?

Aang: On stage, when you said I was just like a… brother to you, and you didn’t have feelings for me.

Katara: I didn’t say that. An actor said that.

Aang: But it’s true, isn’t it? We kissed at the Invasion, and I thought we were gonna be together. But we’re not.

Katara: Aang, I don’t know.

Aang: Why don’t you know?

Katara: Because, we’re in the middle of a war, and we have other things to worry about. This isn’t the right time.

Aang: Well, when is the right time?

Katara: Aang, I’m sorry, but right now I’m just a little confused.

Aang tries to kiss Katara.

Katara: I just said I was confused! I’m going inside. [Exits the balcony.]

Aang: Ugh, I’m such an idiot! [Puts down his head on the balcony railing.]

Opponents claim Aang’s behavior is “entitled” here for two reasons:

1) He asks Katara several questions about their relationship status.

2) He kisses her.

Before I get too far into this, we have to consider the context of the episode. Katara and Aang have this conversation after just watching 95% of “The Boy in the Iceberg,” aka Fire Nation propaganda. I have talked about the specifics of the play being imperialist propaganda here, but the gist of it is that this play is meant to demean the Gaang, to portray them as lesser and weaker than the Fire Nation. The fact that the play ends with Ozai’s victory is a stark reminder of this mentality. So: Katara and Aang have just watched this play that preys upon their insecurities and paints them as awful caricatures of their true selves. It is only natural that they would be more tense than usual. The reason I bring this up is solely to inform their conversation on the balcony, however; I don’t think their frustration solely defines what they say/do, but it’s worth keeping in mind, “Hey, they’re stressed and upset, of course this conversation might not go perfectly.”

Now, I have talked about the infamous EIP kiss before and approached all the rhetoric surrounding it like Snopes Fact Checker in this post, lmao. I did discuss in there why the kiss is wrong, which no one has ever argued against, but also why the kiss is simply a mistake: not sexual assault, not entitlement, not an unforgivable decision. I’ve copied and pasted specifically my notes on the “entitlement” claim below regarding the kiss, but if you have time, I definitely recommend the whole post jksdhjasdka (I’m quite proud of it). Anyways! Here’s the excerpt:

Claim: Aang acted entitled to Katara and her affection.

Status: False.

I’ve briefly addressed this already, but Aang backing off when Katara pushed him away is the exact opposite of entitlement. An impromptu kiss is not always indicative of entitlement. It can be, especially if the person being kissed has never expressed any interest in the person kissing them, but Katara and Aang were mutually interested in each other. They’d mutually kissed twice already by that point: in CoTL and during DoBS. The EIP kiss was inappropriate. NO ONE HAS EVER SUGGESTED OTHERWISE. But when you’re 12 and you’re already kind of in this semi-relationship with a girl you’ve been through hell and high water with (who has kissed you twice on the lips and on the cheek multiple times, not to mention it is only you she ever expresses such affection towards), it is not fucking “entitlement” to make a move on her, even when the timing is off. IT’S JUST A MISTAKE. A POOR DECISION. NOT ENTITLEMENT. NOT MANIPULATION. NOT SEXUAL ASSAULT. Full stop.

Also, these EIP people love to call Aang entitled for this kiss, but there isn’t a single peep heard from them about Zuko’s line in TSR where he demands to know what’s “wrong” with Katara, since she hasn’t forgiven him yet when everyone else has. And look. I think Zuko was just frustrated here, and that he, too, made a mistake and is obviously not irredeemable for it, but. If you’re going to argue that Aang was entitled in EIP, you’d better be ready to acknowledge the argument that Zuko was acting entitled in TSR, too. And hell, let’s take it a step further! Call Aang entitled for EIP. Call Zuko entitled for TSR. Call Sokka entitled for choosing to stay at Boiling Rock on the off chance his father would arrive, thus making Suki and Zuko feel obligated to stay behind with him, effectively putting all of them in danger. What an entitled decision, risking his friends’ lives on the 0.01% chance Hakoda would be one of the many, many possible war prisoners arriving at Boiling Rock!

Damn. That sounds ridiculous as fuck, doesn’t it?

And guess what. That’s exactly how the “Aang was entitled” arguments come across. Hate to break it to you. Trust me when I say to do yourself a favor and stop perpetuating that faulty rhetoric!

So that is what I have already assessed, lol.

To be frank, the most frustrating thing I see perpetuated is that the EIP kiss somehow ruined Aang and Katara’s relationship. But when it comes to assessing weighty issues like the notion of “entitlement” in a relationship, the fact of the matter is that you have to look at both the relationship as a whole and the context in which it is situated. Opponents never want to do that, because doing so debunks their entire (baseless) argument, lmao. Katara and Aang are best friends. And by EIP, they have both expressed romantic interest in each other multiple times. (Here is a post explaining the development of Katara’s feelings for Aang, just to put out that fire before anyone sets it lmao.)

So why, why do opponents think Katara would never find it in herself to forgive Aang for a mistaken kiss? Katara is shown over and over again throughout the series to have one of the biggest hearts. She wants to see the good in people. That’s why she gives Jet a second chance (even though a person could argue he did not “deserve” one); that’s why she helps the Fire Nation village in “The Painted Lady”; that’s why she forgives Pakku (once she sees he’s willing to change); that’s why she is the second person in the entire show (excluding Iroh) to offer Zuko a hand of kindness (in CoD)! That’s why she eventually forgives Zuko, even after all he has done to the Gaang (e.g. sending an assassin after them, being complicit in Aang’s death, attacking her and kidnapping Aang at the NWT, manipulating her with her mother’s necklace, to name a few, lmao. bless his heart, but like Jet, someone could easily argue Zuko doesn’t “deserve” another chance - and yet Katara still gave him [and Jet] one. in fact, she gave Zuko multiple).

In other words, Katara is almost always willing to extend friendship and compassion and forgiveness to others - why would she revoke that privilege from Aang after a single error that is comparatively lesser to all the other horrible things she’s experienced in the war? Again, I’m not downplaying how terrible of a decision Aang made. It’s inexcusable. But it’s not the end of the world, and considering the context of the show (e.g. Aang and Katara liked each other and they both knew it), it’s… not some heinous crime. Compared to, oh, how about attempted murder? lmaoo

Even beyond Katara’s innate kindness, Aang is Katara’s best friend. She loves him. The show portrays it as romantic through the seasons, but even if someone isn’t into shipping (which is super valid), Katara and Aang’s connection is one of the primary lynchpins of the show! (The other being Aang and Zuko, the greatest foils of all time.) Katara and Aang epitomize several of A:TLA’s thematics (and aesthetics) because they are complementary: yin and yang, push and pull, Tui and La, moon and ocean, blue and orange, water and air. This gifset and related commentary beautifully demonstrate how even when Katara and Aang disagree, they respect the other’s the decision. So after 60~ episodes depicting Aang and Katara as having mutual respect and love for each other in every form as well as emphasizing Katara’s natural inclination towards kindness/giving people the benefit of the doubt, opponents still think Katara wouldn’t forgive Aang because of one mistimed, inappropriate kiss? What?? Make it make sense, lmao.

In sum, the kiss was a mistake, not an act of entitlement, and it’s absurd to think Katara would hold that against Aang for the rest of his life.

To backtrack a bit, opponents also love to use the fact that Aang asked Katara several questions about their relationship status as examples of his “entitlement.” Just typing that out highlights the ridiculous nature of this assertion, lmao! Let me rephrase it for maximum hilarity:

“Aang was unsure about where their relationship stood? Well, how dare he ask numerous questions to resolve his confusion!”

Like, what was the alternative jskfajksdas if you are in relationship limbo with someone, it is far better to ask them ‘too many’ questions for clarification than to simply assume one way or the other! Kissing Katara was wrong, flat-out, but asking her questions to better understand where they were in their relationship was like. exactly the right decision, lmao. I genuinely don’t see how that could be indicative of entitlement? Especially because, once again, Aang and Katara both like each other and they both know that by this point in the show. That’s why Aang doesn’t ask if Katara likes him - he knows she does. That’s why Katara doesn’t negate her feelings - she knows she’s interested in him, and the blockade between them is not a lack of reciprocation, but the fact that they’re “in the middle of a war” and consequently it’s not “the right time” for them to begin a relationship. Katara has seen Aang die before! She knows he’s facing a near-impossible victory! I can’t blame her for not wanting to start a relationship with him at that point. It would hurt twice as much to lose him again if they were together in a romantic fashion (amatonormativity, am I right?). Again, Aang’s kiss was entirely inappropriate, but him asking her questions about their relationship is a) an example of fostering healthy communication and b) what any therapist would encourage, lol.

Oh, but I’m “forgetting” something, aren’t I? Right. This line:

Katara: Aang, I’m sorry, but right now I’m just a little confused.

If we want to talk about parallels, which I know the A:TLA fandom adores, this line sounds suspiciously like:

Yue: … but I like you [Sokka] too much and it’s too confusing to be around you.

Yue and Katara are actually in similar situations here. Outside forces are interfering with their relationships; for Yue, there is her arranged marriage, and for Katara, it’s the life-or-death nature of the war itself. They aren’t confused about their feelings, as Yue knows she likes Sokka and Katara knows she likes Aang, but they are confused about how to reconcile those feelings with their external circumstances. And can you blame them for that? They are facing impossible decisions (the fate of their nation and the fate of the world respectively). I would be confused, too! So Katara’s response isn’t a reaction to any so-called “entitlement” from Aang; she is experiencing genuine confusion about how to approach her own feelings for him in the midst of a war.

In sum, Aang asking questions about their relationship was a logical step to take resolving his confusion and is in no way related to “entitlement.” Katara’s confusion was not “letting Aang down easy” and interpreting it as such requires disregarding every preceding line of the conversation and its context.

As you can see, Aang’s actions in EIP are not at all “entitled.” His questions were understandable. While his kiss was inappropriate and inexcusable, it was also a mistake, and there is no canon evidence to support the conclusion Katara would never be able to forgive him (her literal best friend!) for it.

Before I end, I’ll touch briefly upon the DotBS kiss, because it is also occasionally used as an example of Aang’s “entitlement” towards Katara’s feelings. Whether you like the trope or not, this moment falls under what is called the “Now or Never Kiss.” TV Tropes actually lists Kataang/DotBS as an example under the Western Animation tab:

“Avatar: The Last Airbender: The fact that he’s finally going to face the dreaded Firelord, and possibility that he might not come back alive from that battle, gives Aang enough motivation to kiss Katara.”

Again, whether you like the trope or not, it involves reciprocation from both parties:

“The Not-A-Couple [i.e. both parties] don’t want to go out without revealing how they [i.e. both parties] really feel. It’s now or never. They kiss.”

Katara and Aang both like each other. When Aang initiates the DotBS kiss, Katara kisses him back. Her lips are still puckered when he pulls away. Furthermore, Katara had initiated a kiss with Aang prior to this incident, in CoTL. Katara was also the one to initiate every cheek kiss with Aang (who is the only character she ever demonstrated such affection towards). So Aang kissing Katara during DotBS follows an established precedent of Katara initiating different kisses, romantically inclined, with Aang. It’s not entitlement; it’s him knowing they mutually like each other and him realizing this might be the last time he ever sees her. Again, you can hate the trope, but don’t blatantly misconstrue its meaning. You’ll sound like Fire Nation propaganda, lmao. (For clarification, jic: the general you. not anon!)

Here is a fantastic post by @imreallyhereforkataang explaining the DotBS kiss in more detail as well as discussing why Kataang’s progression in the second half of Book 3 was, in fact, well-developed, and how Katara and Aang are best friends above all else and know that (which was the core of their relationship from the start).

And a bonus fun fact: in the original storyboard (link takes you to storyboarder Giancarlo Volpe’s DeviantArt with said storyboard), it is noted that Katara smiles after Aang kisses her. Why? Because she likes him as much as he likes her! It was changed by a “higher authority,” according to Volpe, probably to add more realism to the romance (i.e. Katara likes Aang, yes, but as she herself points out in EIP - there’s a war going on, and love is always terrifying to reconcile with war).

(Seriously, though, do read Volpe’s description on the storyboard. Takes you a second to scroll down and maybe a minute to read. Short yet informative, discussing how you can see on the storyboard itself that someone revised the image so Katara isn’t smiling after the kiss.)

Anyways! Opponents’ argument that Katara wasn’t interested in Aang therefore is and has always been entirely inapplicable.

To conclude: the entitlement assertion is laughable. There is no canon evidence to support it. As such, I encourage you to laugh whenever you see it! Pull an Azula, for that matter:

[ID: Gif from “The Beach” episode of A:TLA. Ty Lee, mimicking a guy, asks Azula, “Hey there sweet sugar cakes. How ya likin’ this party?” Azula proceeds to burst into exaggerated laughter, earning stares from everyone else at the party. End ID.]

Thank you for the great ask, anon! Hopefully my response was satisfactory 💛

[pro-fangirls-unsocial-life]

Welcome Home.

A/N: So I accidentally wrote this fic in discord while talking with @captainrexisboo and thought I’d post it here as well!! I know that the timeline is off with Kix, but I don’t care. Its my fic and I get to decide what the rules are lmao. Anyways, this is what I think would happen if Kix and Rex met in the rebellion. I hope you enjoy! (Also wow. Two fics in two days look at me go after like a month of not posting anything)

Length: ~1800

Warnings. ANGST. Feeling hopeless. Self loathing. Very much a hurt/comfort thing.

It had been three months since Kix had been woken up. The Empire now raged across the galaxy and Kix’s newfound reality now raged throughout his mind, never giving him a moment of rest.

 After three months of being trapped in a tiny ship, the rebellion had decided that Kix was to be brought to the base on Yavin 4. For what, he had no idea, but now that he’s here, he thought it best not to dwell on what awaits him once he reaches his destination within the main building.

 Walking down the halls, he feels a sense of dread at having stares thrown his way by those who remember the clone wars. All of them are older now. All of them know what he did.

The rebel scavenger who found him keeps leading him deeper into the base until they stop in front of the door leading to General Syndulla's quarters. He had been told that this would be who he was being brought to.

 The door whooshes open to reveal Hera, a soft smile gracing her features. "Trooper?"

 "Yes general?"

 "Follow me.”

 Hera looks to the man who had been escorting Kix. "You are dismissed Private."

 With that, she turns, leading him through even more dimly lit hallways, not speaking a word but still keeping a smile on her features.

 They walk like that for a while, Kix having no idea as to where he is being taken. "Do they want to question me? Torture me for information? Make me go undercover for them in the Empire? What use could I be to them?"

 Finally, as they round a corner, his curiosity gets the better of him. "General?"

 Hera stops in front of a large door. "Yes?”

 "Forgive me, but… where are we going? What do you all want from me? I'm no use to anyone anymore."

 Hera smiles and gestures to the door, laying her hand on the panel to open it. She chuckles, placing her other hand on the shoulder of the man in front of her. "All of your questions will be answered Trooper. I promise. But there was someone who wanted to see you first." She presses a button and the door quickly opens, revealing a large room with a briefing table lit up in the center.

 Kix steps inside, looking around and seeing that it’s empty, all except for one person who hurriedly stands from the chair he was just occupying. He is worrying something in his hand but does not move toward Kix.

 "I'll leave you two to catch up," Hera says, closing the door as she turns away.

 Kix looks back at the man, now studying his features. He has deep brown eyes like Kix does and the same general face shape. He's older, bald and sporting a fluffy white beard that covers his face, almost mirroring the one that Kix had grown against his will after all these years. Only, as he looks closer, he can see that it just covers a small scar that runs over the man’s chin.

 Suddenly, his heart drops to his feet. No. This isn't possible. He was the only clone left who wasn't being used by the Empire. He was the only one left who truly knew what had happened. This can’t be real.

 "Rex?" His voice squeaks out in a barely audible whisper as tears threaten to fall from his eyes.

 This has to be a trick. He had already shed his tears, had already mourned all of the lives that he had failed to save. He had already come to terms with his new hopeless reality. This couldn't be real. What would he do if it was?

 What would he do if it wasn't?

 If he allowed himself to believe that the man in front of him was really Rex, but it was just another lie he was being fed by the cruel mistress of fate, it would break him. He could not handle having his spirit broken once more when he had only just begun piecing it back together after so much time being broken.

 No. He would not allow himself to be tricked like this. He attempted to stomp out the small spark of hope that seeing this man had ignited within him. He would no longer be a pawn, an entertainment for those who gained joy from the suffering of others. He couldn't do it again. Not again.

 The man sharply took in a breath at the utterance of the name from Kix's lips and took a small step forward, his hands stopping their movement in front of him. "Kix," he breaths out. His shoulders sag, the tension he was previously holding disappearing as if he had just taken his first breath of peace after escaping a never-ending journey of despair.

 He walked forward, quickening his pace with each step. Kix flinched away, taking two steps back and moving his hand to his hip to grab at a blaster that was not there.

 The man stopped, a questioning pain coming across his features. "Kix?" His voice cracks as he says the name. Almost as if it hurts to say.

 "Don't," Kix snaps out with as much force as he can muster. He feels the tears as they begin cascading down his face. Flowing without any end in sight as Kix's damn keeping them in place shatters at hearing his name from an all too familiar memory. "I won't be tricked by this. Not again."

 "Kix..." The man takes two steps forward, gesturing between the two of them. "It's me. It's Rex. Your Captain."

 "No!" Kix steps back again, shaking his head as he tries to put as much distance between himself and the ghost in front of him as possible. "My Captain, my brother, is dead. All of my brothers are dead." His breathing begins to speed up and his heart breaks as he spits his venom at the image of the man he once trusted more than anyone else in the universe. "My brothers are dead," he quietly chokes out. "And it's all my fault."

 The man stares at him, his eyes tearing up and his heart aching at hearing Kix's words.

 "It's all my fault," he chokes out again. "If I had been faster - if I had been good enough- none of this, the Empire, the Jedi, the death; none of it would have ever happened." He drops to his knees, holding his head in his hands as his tears continue to pool onto the cold stone floor. "I failed you Captain. I failed Fives. I failed Jesse.” A piercing sob tore through him. “All of this happened because of me."

 There is no movement, not a single sound echoing throughout the room except the strangled cries of the still young man. And with each passing second, he can feel his resolve crumbling, until it has completely disappeared.

 He sniffles, his tears still not slowing as they fall from his face onto the floor. "I don't care if your real or not... I wish that you were though.” He pauses. “Just... Just so I can tell Rex that I'm sorry. I'm- I'm so sorry for letting you down. For causing so much pain." He clenches his fists, feeling his nails dig into his palms until he feels them cut into his hand and draw blood. "For killing so many of our brothers."

 For a moment, neither man moves, both keeping their eyes trained on the floor until the sound of boots echo throughout the room, accompanying the lonesome sobs of a defeated young man. They stop in front of Kix and squeak as the man who wears them kneels down to Kix's level.

 He gently places his hand on Kix's shoulder, briefly stopping when Kix flinches away before letting his hand travel to the back of Kix's neck. He leans forward, guiding Kix toward him until their foreheads touch. "It's not your fault Kix."

 Kix slowly draws himself back, looking up at the man with red eyes and a tear-stained face, finding a pained stare looking back at him. He searches the eyes of the older man, seeing nothing but kindness and sincerity in his gaze. "Rex?" His broken voice comes out as a whimper, only loud enough for the man in front of him to just barely hear it.

 The man nods, a small smile coming across his face, conflicting with the tear-stained cheeks it moves with. "It's me, vod. It's me."

 "Rex!" Kix cries out as he lunges forward, tightly wrapping his arms around Rex and pulling him as close as he can, feeling Rex do the same thing. Sobbing into his shoulder as his walls come crashing down and the small spark of hope he failed to extinguish ignites the long dormant fire within him once again. "I'm so sorry, vod. I tried. I tried so hard to make everything right. I tried so hard to save all of you." His tears have already made a wet spot on Rex's shirt and his breath comes out in huffs as he breaks down in his brother’s arms. "I'm so sorry Rex. I'm so sorry."

 Rex tightly squeezes his brother, not ever wanting to let him go. "No, Kix. You have nothing to be sorry for." His own tears return, falling onto Kix's back as the other continues sobbing into his shoulder. "You did everything you could and you would have made it if I had just listened to Fives sooner." The younger man shakes as his cries continue and Rex begins to rub small, soothing circles on his back, rocking them back and forth where they are curled up on the floor. "It's not your fault. It's not your fault. It's not your fault." He whispers the phrase, over and over and over, until Kix stops shaking and his breathing has evened out against his shoulder.

 Pulling back, Rex smiles as he is finally given a moment to look over the face of his little brother after so many years. His eyes are red and puffy, and there are tears that make his cheeks shine, but it is Kix. The same brave, kind Kix that he once knew. "I see you've copied my beard," he joked, reaching his hand up to stroke at the hair on his face.

 Kix laughs, wiping at his nose as he takes a deep breath to try and calm down. "Believe me, it will be the first thing to go once I get my hands on a razor."

 Rex chuckles, bringing his hand up to cup the back of Kix's neck and guide him forward until their foreheads are touching once again.

 Kix closes his eyes, taking in a deep breath. "I missed you vod. It's- It's been so long--" His words are cut short by Rex dragging him into a tight hug, fisting the fabric of Kix's shirt so tight that his knuckles turn white.

 He takes a deep breath, grabbing onto Rex's shirt in the same way, never wanting to let go.

 "Welcome home, vod," he hears in his ear. "Welcome home."

[kbsd]

not sure if you’ve answered this before, but what’s your process look like when you make an amv? i’m just curious and in constant awe of ppl who can make videos like you do :)

hello all!!! i have answered this before and i have a vid help tag with other asks i’ve gotten about stuff like this! but i’ve gotten several more messages along these lines so i’m just going to answer a bunch of them together (under a cut since i love to ramble about editing lol). i do just wanna say i’m definitely not the authority on video editing and obv everyone has their own techniques!

edit: i just finished typing all this up and it’s SO long so sorry in advance LMAO god bless anyone who reads this entire thing

so i work in news tv and we have a very specific workflow for writing scripts, sourcing video, producing, and editing. i’ve just applied that to making amvs! for every video i make, i copy the song lyrics into a google doc and adjust them to match the song i’ve cut (i often will trim songs for time and/or content purposes). then i start planning! i’ll mark down what clip i want to use for each lyric next to that line, and any sound bites i want to use (with episode numbers!). i’ll color code between video and sound bites and lyrics, so my scripts end up looking something like this (for my honeybee amv):

doing the planning ahead of time makes everything much easier when it’s a video that spans the whole show or involves a lot of sourcing, like honeybee or sports analogies. that way when i get to the actual editing process, i already know what i’m going to do and have a game plan. for videos like happy ending or believe it or not, where i’m mainly just pulling from a few episodes, i can just plan it in my head as opposed to writing it all down, and produce as i edit. obviously i do make in-the-moment decisions while editing—sometimes a shot doesn’t work the way i thought it would, or i go where the video takes me—but planning ahead definitely helps. i know some people use spreadsheets as well, with columns for lyrics, video clips, and sound bites if applicable. once you find a system that works, it actually goes pretty quickly.

as for sourcing clips themselves/finding clips within episodes, i talked about that here and kind of here. the short version is that transcripts are a must, and the supernatural wiki is hugely helpful by cataloguing all the hugs, prayers, phone calls, etc. in the show. gifmakers that tag episode numbers on their posts are your friends. it gets easier the more video you make—that’s another huge reason i make the google docs for each video (even the ones i plan in my head, i end up going back and making a loose script with episode notes just for reference). if i can’t remember where something is but i know i used it in another video, i can easily reference past scripts!

i also cut all my videos in the same project in premiere pro, so i can flip between them easily. instead of checking a past script, i can just go to the video sequence itself and copy the clip i’m looking for! this was especially helpful when i match cut together the 5x18 and 4x22 wall slam shots for my bestie video, and then stole it from myself for honeybee hahaha. at any given time i have at least 8 sequences open:

because of the sheer volume of videos i make, it’s worth it for me to download the entire show—i have all 327 episodes in HD, plus deleted scenes. if you think you’re only going to make a few videos, i’d start with scene packs. you can usually just google “destiel [or whatever ship/character you’re looking for] scene packs” and there will be any number of ones you can download. if you need other specific scenes, you can always download/torrent individual episodes or screen record netflix (that’s what i did before i got HD download links). i’m happy to share my links if you DM, but be warned it’s a lot of disk space (about 500GB on my hard drive). someone also compiled every destiel scene, downloadable here.

having every episode already loaded in premiere for all my projects also makes it a lot easier to source clips. once i use a clip in a video, i’ll put a marker on the episode file, so that after a while i have most of the important scenes/lines marked to easily find them. to give you an idea, this is my episode file in premiere for 12x10 lily sunder has some regrets (markers at destiel scenes, the car fight, hot girl cas, etc.). markers are the green tabs along the bottom:

premiere also lets you color code and name markers, so ONE DAY i will go back and color code them all. the ones above are all the same color, but in a perfect world, i’d have a myraid—for destiel shots like hugs, touches, looks; for important pieces of dialogue; for action shots; etc. but for now this works ok for me, so that’s a project for another time!

between detailed scripts, one giant premiere project, markers, the wiki, and my own memory, i have so many points of reference that i can usually find any clip i need in about 2 minutes max. sound bites are often harder to start out, or tiny specific shots i haven’t used before, and that’s when i turn to tumblr gifsets or beloved mutuals to crowdsource. but if you’re as obsessive about marking/keeping neat scripts as i am, it gets easier and easier with every video you make. that’s part of why i’m able to cut videos together so quickly. (also i want to stress i do this for a living and have to produce/edit a new piece for my show every day so i’m used to it. and compared to constantly updating content/sources and news that changes every day, 327 highly documented episodes that never change are much easier to handle hahaha)

this is all great for me since i make so many videos and plan to continue doing so, but if you’re only making a few, this level of work isn’t worth it imo. really it’s all about developing a system that works for you. whatever you do with episodes/sourcing, though, i cannot recommend planning things out in a script ahead of time enough. 

everything i just mentioned is producing, though. for the editing process, i usually do it in this order:

music first. any parts i want to cut, i make sure it all sounds smooth

then soundbites. i usually try to weave them into the lyrics—i have characters talk in breaks between lines or instrumental sections as much as possible. i’ll sometimes go so far as looped/extending an intsrumental part to make room for the soundbite i want there lol. if i do have dialogue over a line, i do the sound mixing/levels at this point as well to make sure everything is audible/one doesn’t overpower the other. (also i always include the video that goes with these bites when i drop them in, and decide later if i want to show the character speaking or have other clips cover the dialogue)

once i have all the audio locked in, then i bring in all my other video clips. sometimes i edit completely chronologically, sometimes jumping from section to section—it depends on the song or how i’m feeling

double check sound mixing. i usually listen to my videos through a few times, with headphones and without to make sure it’ll sound good no matter how people watch it

once i have picture and audio lock, i go through and color correct my clips. i’m basic and just use lumetri color in premiere, and usually just play with brightness, saturation, temperature, and tint until i like it

render and export! :)

i always have several audio tracks, but i try to keep my video tracks condensed. i’ll drop clips on a V2 level, and edit a section there, and drop the whole chunk down to V1 so i know it’s finished. that way when i leave and come back i can know where i left off/what’s done/etc. to give you an idea, this is the timeline for my what the hell video:

i always render as H.264 with high bitrate, and make sure to check “render at maximum depth” and “use maximum render quality” for the best quality. i’m sorry, but i don’t know what the equivalent options are in final cut, imovie, kdenlive, etc. i post on youtube mostly so i don’t have to sacrifice quality, but usually just using a lower bitrate will get you under the tumblr file size limit and it’ll still look good.

as for the anon who asked about “polishing”: first of all, thank you!! second of all, it’s in the details. all of this is a matter of taste and my own insanity, but here are some little things i always try to do:

after i color correct, i blur out any credits from the starts of episodes. i use gaussian blur for this, but really any blur tool works

as much as possible, i avoid clips where we see a character’s mouth move but don’t hear the words. in tv/film we call it “lip flap” and i just think it looks messy. also i’m trained to avoid it at all costs at work hahaha. it’s more for serious videos that this matters a lot to me (e.g. i think i did a really good job eliminating lip flap in my happy ending amv)—for comedy videos i don’t sweat it as much

i put audio fades on the start and end of every single audio clip i use, even if i don’t think i need it, to make sure everything sounds smooth

i use markers for timing, especially in action-y videos like what the hell. i’ll put a marker on the clip i’m using at the exact moment a punch lands, and in the song on the beat. if i have the magnet/snap in timeline tool on i can just easily snap them together instead of having to spend time finagling it

this is such a small thing but i dip/cut to black for a tiny bit at the start and end of every video. this way if i post with tumblr video player, there’s black between the loops, and it gives you a beat before the video restarts. i do this even on videos i post on youtube, just because i think it looks nicer/more professional

this is 1,500 words so i’m going to stop myself before i pull something. if you have follow-up questions feel free to ask and i’ll continue to add them to the vid help tag, but any more questions about sourcing clips or my process in general i’ll just link this post going forward. anyone who made it this far, i am sending to a telepathic kiss. thank you for reading and happy editing!

[cryinginthebackseat]

initials t.c.

Fandom: Open Heart

Pairing: Tobias Carrick x MC

Words: 7.299 (I’M SO SORRY)

Summary: Tobias Carrick makes Claire an offer she can’t refuse.

Warnings: 50% plot, 50% smut, swear-a-thon, blasphemy

Author’s Note: when the book first introduced us to tobias carrick, the first thing that hit my mind was “okay, but that dude is like the carbon copy of jesse williams and that’s hot” but then, once it reveals who he is and what’s his role in the book i went “interestinggggggg” cause you know, i’m a sucker for morally grey characters and all, and i’m not even ashamed to admit it. also, carrick is shaping up to be such an interesting character with each chapter and maybe one day- okay, maybe this sounds like a pipe dream- but one day, i hope he can be a li (let a girl dream plz) lmao

also if anyone’s interested, i made a PLAYLIST to accompany reading the fic.

the title is inspired by serge gainsbourg’s initials bb

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Cast down off heaven Cast down on my knees I’ve lain with the devil Cursed god above Forsaken heaven

To Bring You My Love - PJ Harvey

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ 

Whenever Claire thinks about Tobias Carrick, admittedly, unfortunately, tragically, she always thinks about his eyes first before remembering what a colossal pain in the ass he is.

It always comes in that order. Like the number 3 always comes before 4, like the seawater dragging back from the shoreline before a tsunami occurs, like pouring milk before the cereal (she honestly didn’t get what the fuss is about until one day Elijah cried ‘oh, hell no you don’t, satan!‘ one morning and proceeded to give her bullet points why pouring the milk before the cereal is considered a sin and more of an abomination than Nephilims’ existence and that there’s a higher probability that she’s a psycho for being a ‘milk first’ kind of person). So apparently, Claire’s a psycho now which explains so many aspects- but she digresses and the point is, the reaction is uncontrollable and she high-key hates how she can’t control her goddamn mind most of the time.

The point is, she needs to stop thinking about him to begin with. 

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ 

Claire Castelnuovo was born in the summer, under the sign of Gemini. Marilyn Monroe once said that stands for intellect, being a Gemini, but she was too blissfully unaware of this guerdon that she devoted her adolescent years to being outdoors instead. Too many days she spent trampling along the cornfields with her cousins until the skies faded out with brilliant purple-tinged amber and she was carrying a piece of the sun in her skin and smelled like one, stuffing wildflowers inside her boots as she walked around the neighborhood with her dad’s old stethoscope, napping in a hammock with Oasis’ All Around the World on repeat. By the time she hit 15, her black strands had turned brown from repeated sun exposure. She loved it.

But it was a different time, a different place. Somewhere that only exists on the margins of her memories, lost and hidden.

Now, Claire prefers the night.

It’s 9:30 pm when she arrives at a hotel bar in downtown Boston. A newly christened establishment which has somehow become a regular spot for Hemingway’s enthusiasts once the Boston Globe wrote an article about their Hemingway Daiquiri and how, as they wrote it, ‘probably the only place that’s brave and crazy enough to adhere to the 1930s original recipe’ and bourgeois party birds at wee hours during the weekend.

Her eyes are gritty, dry and strange. Her mind’s much worse for the wear- she feels like shit, like in the middle of watching that scene from The Green Mile shit when all is hopeless and you feel like walking out of the theater, but you’ve spent your last savings just to buy the ticket, so you decide to stick through it.

Claire makes a beeline for the bar, tries to flag down the bartender. She orders an Old Fashioned, making sure to specify to double it because she’s not a regular here and he’s not Reggie and that’s how she’s been taking her drink for years.

She knows well deep in her bones that she should be somewhere else. Somewhere more familiar, somewhere where Tim Mcgraw often plays from the subpar speakers, and the rustic wooden bar countertop is gouging and discoloring from the cheap household cleaners and alcohol stains, and her friends are cramming together in the same booth in the back, reveling and laughing until they close the bar down and make a mess all over. Perhaps it’s a mistake coming here, where no one’s a familiar face and the drinks are a tad overpriced for her budget.

But then, perhaps this is exactly what she needs; the unfamiliarity, the visceral feeling knowing that she doesn’t belong here, where no one knows her name and the huge deal of weight she’s currently carrying on her shoulders. Perhaps, she can’t face her friends after what happened, after what Esme has done. Shit, how could any of this happen? Claire knows this all on Esme’s, but her guilt has grown hopelessly tangled with her anxiety. She’s her intern, for fuck’s sake, Claire’s supposed to prevent this from happening in the first place.

Man, where’s Declan Nash when she feels like punching someone in the face?

Claire makes the mistake of drinking her drink too quickly, because it hasn’t been ten minutes and she’s drained half of the content. Then she reaches for her phone in her bag, fiddles with it, absent-minded, equal parts bored before then settles on watching the band performing Art Pepper’s You Go To My Head and immediately thinks of that time she accidentally dropped her brother’s saxophone in a moment of her rather graceless, wine-soaked self with the whole family present.

Someone plops down on the empty stool next to her. Claire’s now scrolling through her phone- again, bored. Sienna commented on the post Elijah shared to the group chat with a few unnecessary-yet-totally-necessary emojis to the already convoluted series of texts and Claire only reads them in silence, not only because her friends’ texting behaviors are too chaotic for her to follow sometimes but she’s not really feeling like talking to anyone right now.

“Well, well, well, look what the cat dragged in.”

Famous last words.

Claire freezes in her seat. Her phone’s still glowing in her hand, alighting her features. She recognizes that voice- too well, that is and it’s enough to set off her flight-or-fight response.

She glances up from her phone, preparing for the worst.

Well, what’s presented before her is literally the worst.

“Of all the gin joints…” she says once her eyes find Tobias Carrick sitting next to her, still in his work shirt, sleeves rolled-up, a few buttons undone, reeking of smoke, soap and antiseptic with a shit-eating grin plastered over his face.

She should have gone to Donahue’s instead.

“Evening to you too, Castelnuovo. Drinking your dinner tonight, I see?”

“What, this? No, this is breakfast. 100% daily value of alcohol and pretty much nothing else. I mean, it’s not the weekend without a bad case of hangover and an aspirin snowglobe in the morning, am I right? You know, like a glass of aspirin? Not a literal snowglobe?” she blabbers, realizing just so by the time she hears him snort. Claire chokes down another sip to shut her mouth up. “What the hell are you doing here?”

“I’m about to commit first-degree murder and burn this whole place to the ground,” he drawls, the ever goddamn sarcastic. “What do you think? I’m trying to get dru-”

“No, I mean what are you doing here, of all places? Can’t you get drunk somewhere else?” she interrupts, her midwest accent does funny things to the vowels and consonants- something that only happens whenever she’s in distress, or at least according to Jackie.

“Last time I heard, this joint’s still owned by the Hilton, not a certain junior member of the Diagnostics Team at Edenbrook hospital.”

“Dude, what do you think of the H in Claire H. Castelnuovo stands for?” Deadpan, trying to keep up with the rolling sarcasm, she retorts. He smirks.

“Horatio?”

“Get the fuck out of here,” she mutters, mid-eye-roll, mid-snickering.

He chuckles, his voice rich and smoky amidst the late-night swing and distant chatters. Carrick doesn’t leave, of course, typically him- if those anecdotes Ethan told her has taught her anything about his character, that is- defying everything, scheming his way to the top, the embodiment of ‘those devilish boys with their heavenly eyes’ type your mother warns you about.

Not that the latter is relevant.

“Or what?” His mouth twitches but there’s a hard, challenging light in his eyes that she knows too well by now.

“Or I’m leaving.“ She shoots him a glare. He’s testing her patience- again, like it’s his finesse. Some things never change, it seems.

“Come on, Castelnuovo, don’t be a sourpuss. The night is young and I can promise you, the last thing I am is a horrible drinking buddy.”

With a touch of irony, she replies: “I’m sure. I bet you asked your friends to fill out a questionnaire every time you went out with them, did you?”

Carrick hums.

“You’re funny.” But he says it in the same tone that someone might say Jesus fuck, you’re probably one of the most frustrating creatures I’ve ever laid eyes on. Also, because the next thing he says is: “A little rough around the edges, but funny nonetheless.”

“That makes one of us then.”

Carrick frowns, which is kind of a surprise because she’s half expected him to flash her that signature cheeky grin of his.

“Listen, I’m just trying to make a friendly conversation here. I know we haven’t really seen eye-to-eye with each othe-”

Claire snorts and crosses her arms over her chest. “That, doctor, is an understatement of the fucking century.”

“Okay so, we’re like Tom and Jerry but sans the background music and a naive little duckling running around calling one of us his momma, but I feel like now’s the time to call out a temporary truce between us.” A beat, then: “I heard about what happened with the intern.”

Something flashes across her face- and Carrick must have noticed it, because his face does this odd thing- it softens, even for a moment. She hates it. He’s not supposed to be looking at her like that, not supposed to see her at her weakest state or saved her ass- And Jesus, why does she have to be indebted to Tobias Carrick, of all people- But god forbid, the last thing she’ll ever do is crying in front of him.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” she mutters, barely audible, trying to temper her fluctuated emotions.

“Then don’t. We can talk about anything else or fall into some sort of endless, meaningless platitudes. Whichever will work.” As if sensing Claire’s lingering hesitation, he adds. “Tell you what, to sweeten the offer, your next drinks are on me.”

She assesses him for a long minute, eyes narrowing. She’s shaking her head, but her mouth, as if against her will, instead says: “Careful, Carrick, there’s a chance I’ll be abusing that offer and run you dry.”

"Hey, if you want to butcher your liver so bad, don’t stop on my account,” he says. “Don’t worry, though, I’ll make sure to save your ass again this time around. Pro bono.”

Claire looks as if she’s just swallowed a dead rat. “Thanks, but no thanks. Death seems more like an appealing choice.”

“Well, I stopped death from interfering then, I’ll stop it again.” Carrick winks, she pretends to gag again yet remains still in her seat, so Carrick waves at the bartender for their order- she orders for a refill and he, a martini and Claire is this close from asking 'shaken or stirred?’ but then remembers who he is and immediately washes the question down with her drink.

“You know, if anyone told me weeks ago that I’d be having a drink with you tonight, I probably would have socked them.“

Carrick is in the middle of lighting his cigarette, but laughs instead. “The Times They Are a-Changin’, as Bob Dylan said.” A puff of smoke escapes his mouth, curling around his fingers. Claire instinctively looks away. “Which reminds me of that one time your mentor sang Ballad of A Thin Man on the fucking subway when we were 20.”

She swivels her head to his direction, on the verge of choking on her drink. “Hold on, hold on, Ethan Jonah Ramsey sings?”

“Give him a dare he couldn’t refuse and a few shots of whiskey, and I promise you he’ll sing like Sinatra on crack.” He grins, his eyes are all crinkled and bright; she thinks that means he’s genuinely amused. “Ah, good times. We were like- wait, who was it he’d like to say we’re like again?”

A small smile pulls at her lips. “Bert and Ernie.”

“Jesus, he really fucking compares us to some Sesame Street characters, huh?” She laughs at that, loud and bright. He does the same. “Personally, I’d always say we were like Butch and Sundance back then- rebels with a cause, a band of misfits, trying to leave our marks on the world. You know those types. We were young, we wanted so much- I still do. I mean, let’s be real, whoever’s wanted to be defeated at their own game?”

A crease forms between her eyebrows, not quite a frown.

“Nobody,” Claire concurs, hating herself for it. “But was it worth it? Betraying the closest thing you had to a brother or a lover…” Carrick coughs on his smoke from the latter. “or whatever in the process just to get what you wanted?” Claire was obviously aiming for that brash, hard-hitting jab, but it lands gloriously too soft.

The bartender finally places their ordered drinks down on the bar. Carrick reaches for it, taking a careful swig, then sets his glass down. He takes a deep breath.

"It’s nothing personal. It never was. I never considered him as my rival.”

“Yeah, but by doing whatever you did, you’ve made an enemy out of him,” she counters. “Look, Carrick, I know we live in a dog-eat-dog world and I know being good sometimes doesn’t get the job done. Perhaps Machiavelli was right. Perhaps, when necessary, you have to be ruthless, dissembling and manoeuvring- what did he say again? ‘The end justifies the means’? But if any worthwhile end can justify the means to attain it, if everyone outright surrenders to their darker side, then what’s left of our humanity?”

For an interminable moment, there is only silence. He simply stares at her, as if she’s a walking, talking Rubik’s cube he can’t solve or a book that he has opened and now he’s got to know so much more and she feels pinned under those warm irises, uneasy.

Suddenly, his mouth begins to take shape; the corners hike up, stretch and then he does the unexpected.

The bastard fucking laughs.

“Excuse me?!” she spits, white-hot anger lacing each word. Carrick laughs harder- the audacity- despite Claire’s growing razor’s edge stare. “Did you just laugh at me? I was being fucking seriou-”

“Sorry, sorry.” Wiping an imaginary tear from his left eye. “I was just remembering Harper’s words. She’s right, you really are on the side of the angels, aren’t you?”

She points at him with her glass, snarling. “And you, mister, are the devil himself with a medical degree and an egg head- and I don’t mean the slang for a highly academic person.”

“Ouch,” Carrick says out loud, still kind of laughing, borderline frowning. “Okay, I’m sorry. That was uncalled for.”

“Damn straight. Though you have a lot to apologize for.”

He groans. “Don’t tell me you’re still pissed about that one patient I stole under your nose?”

“The North remembers, ser,” she says, mean-spirited.

“Then does the North remembers that I saved her life?”

“Oh, so you’re discrediting the efforts of the other doctors that helped you make the cure?”

“Alright, alright. You win.” Carrick holds up his hands, the universal gesture of defeat and takes one final drag of his cigarette. He stubs it out, all the while keeping his gaze on her.

“So, how exactly can I make it up to you?“

Claire blinks- once, twice, thrice, realizing his intent. His voice drops an octave and he’s leaning in, close enough for her to notice the constellations of freckles splaying across his face and the way his brown eyes glinted like two shots of whiskey under a stream of light, intense and all-consuming. She feels her mind races, her brains feel as if they underwent a short-circuit and get caught on fire, and the fact that her mind’s on the precipice of exploring the idea is not helping.

A burst of laughter erupts from her throat, not that it’s funny- there’s nothing funny about the situation, but someone ought to diffuse this shift of tension between them, or that was her aim, at least.

“What, you wanna pay me back?” she asks, trying to keep her voice from cracking but failing miserably. Fingers trembling against her glass as she chugs nearly a quarter of her drink in one go.

He notices that.

"A Lannister always pays his debts, does he? If you think that I owe you one, then I’ll gladly pay.” His eyes flick back to her face, searing into her. The air crackles between them. The band is playing a different song now, a sound that only exists on the margin of her attention. If they’re in, say a mid 2000s rom-com movie, someone would probably interrupt this moment and save her from this. But this isn’t a movie.

Claire licks her lips, a candid reaction which encourages him to inch closer- or is it her? She can’t tell anymore. Tracing odd patterns on the palm of her hand with his finger and oh god, this is Carrick, the bane of her fucking existence, she’d shoot him first before she kisses him. But something about the prospect of fucking this bastard twists her insides deliciously into a confused mess.

“How? By fucking me?” she inquires, feigning scandalized- all that Catholic guilt bullshit.

He grins, all-teeth and wolfish and shrugs as if they’re talking about his life insurance policy or shit. “Well, that’s the idea.”

“But you don’t even like me.” It should come out as I don’t even like you, but even she knows that’ll be just another lie she tells.

“On the contrary, I enjoy our rivalry far more than I should, Castelnuovo,” he purrs and places a hand on her knee. Her throat bobs. She’s wearing a skirt, it didn’t seem important then, but now his hand feels warm against her skin, dangling on the edge of impropriety. Like gravity, all it takes is a little push for him to cross that line.

“I should be disliking the way you talk to me, challenging me and putting me on the back foot every goddamn time. I should be focusing on taking you down a peg, but the more I see you, the more I realize you have an attractive kind of power. And I’m just one man. And if there’s anything I learned, the only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.”

But then his movement suddenly ceases. Claire almost asks why.

"However…”

“What?” she stares up at him, eyes wide, breath hitching.

“However if you only accept alcohol as the currency for transactions, then I’ll tell the bartender to get us another round instead,“ he tells her, offering her one last chance to back out from this, from making this mistake with him.

Claire stares into her drink, actually mulling this over. Her mind tells her no, but the other part- the alcohol-infused part of her mind- whispers otherwise. She imagines if Ethan or any of her friends are here, they would probably grab her shoulder and shake the living hell out of her for even reconsidering his offer.

But then again, intelligence, alcohol and desperation have always had a bad history of getting along together.

“What about June?” Claire asks against her better judgement, after a long, considerable pause. Carrick raises a confused brow.

“What about her?”

“I thought you guys…” she trails off, makes a face, feeling all-kind of flustered and aroused and wow, she’s really doing this, huh? “I mean, I don’t know- I don’t wanna get in between you guys.”

“Nah. It was only a three time thing, but there’s never been anything between us.” He chuckles at Claire’s askance look. “If you don’t believe me, you can fact-check it with the woman herself,” Carrick adds, looking at her dead-on with his eyes like he wants to get the message across.

She regards him silently for a long second, and maybe she’s a touch drunk now, maybe the bartender put something in her drink, or maybe she just needs to blow off some steam after what’s been happening in these past few weeks and Carrick happens to be a decent warm body for the occasion, but Claire finds herself shifting closer.

"Then I want you to pay me back.”

“You sure about that?”

“Yeah,” she answers, more sure this time, more determined.

Her nose bumps his, his breath fanning across her face all the while Carrick’s slightly pushing her skirt up, letting his fingertips travel higher. His eyes keep darting back and forth from her eyes and lips, checking for her reaction. There is no inhibition here, not anymore. People might be watching- heck, they could be already watching and it terrifies her that she doesn’t give a damn about it.

“But if you tell anyone about this, I swear to god… ” she warns and a shadow of mirth passes across his eyes, making her almost regretting this. Almost.

“Claire, darling.” It’s the first time he’s ever said her name and her stomach does a tango. “Your secret is safe with me.“ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ 

He gets them a room in the hotel, it’s on the twentieth floor. Carrick handles the accommodation- he can afford it, apparently, which is not really surprising and the nuisating check-in procedure while Claire only waits in the lobby like a beautiful, agitated china doll amidst the turbulent sea the whole time until he comes back, flashes the room key at her and beckons her to follow.

She goes ahead of him, but he catches up. His body heat sends her anxiety rocketing sky-high through the roof as they walk next to each other, hands briefly brushing against one another but she ignores that (or at least she tries).

They are silent in the elevator, they are silent even once they reach the designated floor and walk down the hall to their room where the dim and shadowed lights follow their steps like vultures.

Carrick holds open the door for her and she enters, taking in the windows and the striking view of Boston skyline peeking behind the curtains, the TV and the queen-sized bed. The latter does nothing to assuage the anticipation that’s bubbling in the pit of her stomach, by the way.

Claire hears him shut the door, locking both bolts. She peers at him over her shoulder, half-turned, one eye on him. Their eyes meet, neither speaks. He’s taking off his black peacoat, back against the door, he’s looking at her as if wanting her is his full-time occupation and the realizations comes in like a mule kick, how that tiny voice inside her head, the one that tells her that this is a bad idea and she’s better off leaving never comes.

The room is not considerably huge (with $110 per night, you would have expected you’d get a bigger room), he could easily have her in six large steps, yet he stands there. Sizing her up, smirking rather devilishly, handsomely as if challenging her to make the first move. It’s another fucking game with him. A display of power, waiting who would fall first.

Claire finally turns around to face him. With a renowned determination, she removes her coat, letting it fall unceremoniously onto the carpeted floor. Her blouse follows next and her skirt, which she tugs it oh so slowly down her legs.

Carrick’s eyes widen, if she doesn’t know better, she thinks he’s speechless. He takes a deep breath, his gaze religiously following every movement as she twirls around once more to unhook her bra. His jaw clenches and unclenches. He’s having a hard time keeping himself in check which she takes an immense pleasure in. Claire just wants to see the man squirm for a change, even if she has to shed every article of clothing she wears.

By the time she slips off of her underwear, she is breathing raggedly. He hasn’t yet approached her so she crawls onto the bed, lying on her back with one elbow props her up, legs crossed. She kicks off her heels, rolls down her stockings with a bit of that noir come-hither, Lauren Bacall-esque heavy bedroom eyes.

Finally, Carrick steps closer until he’s only a hair’s breadth away, like a target, filling her line of sight. The tension in the room is hot enough to send the thermometer reaching its maximum limit and she’s burning, burning, burning right through the core.

Claire cranes her head up to meet his gaze, noticing the way he’s drinking in her body like a pirate ogling a bottle of rum. High-strung, tense, Carrick lowers his head to her, his fingers carding through her long hair. Dimness consumes him raw, his silhouette is starting to find its place amongst the shadows except for his eyes. Never does the fire in his eyes falter, merely alight.

They are already nose-to-nose when Claire suddenly raises her hand over his lips. He withdraws from her, looking confused and hot and bothered.

“Take a seat over there, will you?” She motions to the settee near the bed, her tone leaving no room for argument.

He smirks, but she can see his bravado if faltering. “Ordering me around in the bed now, are we?”

“Didn’t you say tonight is about you making it up to me?”

“Touche, touche.” Carrick straightens his posture and makes his way to the settee across from her, shifting uncomfortably in his seat given the growing issue in his pants.

With eyes still trained to his, Claire cups her own breast, fingers pinching her pebbled nipple before the same hand travels lower down her stomach, her thighs. Carrick leans forward in his seat, obviously liking where this is going before Claire slowly and teasingly part her legs for him to see.

A surprised groan escapes him.

“Jesus, Claire,” Carrick hisses. “Fuck, I didn’t know you’re a goddamn tease.”

She doesn’t bother replying to him, but a winning grin finds its way across her face as she lays on her back, her shame and modesty are distant, knees pulled up so he can have a clear view of her. With two fingers, she runs them along her folds, dragging them slowly up to her clit. Claire imagines they are his fingers- which once upon a time would have horrified her, but tonight, as she repeats the motion over and over, knowing that he’s sitting there, watching her without being able to get his hands on her, she decides to submit to this newfound fantasy.

A rustle pulls her back to reality. He’s undoing his own pants, palming his cock, runs his fingers over the leaking head.

A low moan catches in her throat at that, her gaze snapping up from his erection to his face where his irises have darkened and pupils dilated. He wants to show her, that’s he’s as depraved as her when it comes to wanting, that he fucking wants her and in spades and she fails to think like a normal human being anymore.

Claire uses that image to work on herself harder, faster, feeling the intense pressure beginning to build beneath her fingers. She’s so wet now, despite him being able to see that, she wants him to hear it as well as she uses her idle hand to tap against herself. Carrick growls, his pace matching the rhythm she’s setting.

She slips her fingers inside her, drops her head back against the mattress and bites a loud moan that threatens to escape her lips. Flushing scarlet all over her abdomen, her breasts and up to her neck. Her blood thumping louder than bombs in her ears, her breaths begin to come in gasps.

Another fast and hard thrust from fingers, and Claire finds herself sighing his name.

“Tobias…”

And every last bit of his self-restraint snaps.

In just a blink of an eye, Carrick is already on his feet, grabs her waist, harshly, and tugs her down onto the edge of the bed where he’s now kneeling before her. He doesn’t bother with the teasings or soft kisses or caresses, and even before Claire has the time to register what’s happening, he crushes his face between her parted legs and eats her out.

She gasps, high and fleeting, twisting the bed sheet between her fists while his tongue flicks over her, moving back up, back down, lapping along her folds in the same motions she showed him with her hand, how she likes it. Claire forgets how to breathe. It just occurs to her just how arousing the sight of him on his knees like this, sending her mind hitchhiking into outer space.

“Oh, fuck.” She breathes, back arching on the bed with a drawn-out moan. “Fuck, Tobias!” Her hips gyrate over his mouth and she presses her heels against his shoulder blades. She’s so close. All she needs is a little push to send her careening into oblivion and it seems that Carrick can sense it because he brings two digits to her entrance and slides easily inside her, setting a ruthless pace.

With her hands reaching out to the back of his head, Claire cries out his name and trembles violently. Encouraged, Carrick curves his fingers inside her, hitting that exact spot that finally undoes her as she comes, long and hard, around his mouth and fingers- the kind of orgasm that you can feel deep in your bones- and watches as fireworks dance behind her lids.

When she finally comes down from her high, everything is hazy. It’s like waking up from a deep slumber after a decadent soak in a scented bath and she loses all orientation, until she feels him nipping the inside of her thighs. She hisses, glances down, heavy-lidded eyes finding Carrick is leaving bruises after bruises all over her skin like some kind of a lewd memento of his work, like he wants her to remember this the next time she wakes up in her own bed and he’s not there.

"Are you trying to turn me into a Na'vi, doctor?” She asks, still kinda breathless, feeling surprisingly conversational despite having just experienced, if not, one of the best orgasms in her life. He smiles against her thigh and withdraws from her, only after her thighs are sufficiently bruised enough, licks his fingers clean and stands up at the end of the bed.

“Maybe. You’d make a cute blue extraterrestrial creature, though,” he replies cheekily, then undoes the button of his shirt, showcasing his naked torso.

Claire feels her cheeks heating up again, but forces herself to stare; eyes following his pectoral muscles, down to the toned lines of his abdomen while he slides off of his pants. The man is one fine specimen, alright, and he knows- smug bastard- and she thinks it’s such a shame that Carrick is… well, Carrick. If the man learns how to shut up for one minute or avoid trying to sabotage everyone’s career at Edenbrook altogether, maybe, just maybe, she’d consider him.

“But honestly, I just wanted to hear you say my name again,” Carrick continues, crawling his way up to her, pulling her out of her musings. He settles between her thighs. His lips finding her ear and nibbling at the lobe while his fingers pinching and pulling at her nipple. Claire shivers. Nails scraping along his skin, raising angry marks that would certainly be there tomorrow.

When they kiss, it’s so good that she can’t help but curl her toes. He kisses her like he’s trying to steal her breath or her name. She can taste herself in his mouth, which sparks so many feelings inside her. Her mind’s foggy, sweat pooling on her forehead. Carrick is but shoves his tongue into her mouth, lapping at her, biting, sucking and she leans hard into the kiss, retaliates by scraping her teeth against his bottom lip. It spurs him on. Making his cock twitch against her thigh and Claire decides she can’t wait anymore.

Claire rolls her hips at him. He takes the hint and rolls over to grab a condom from his pants. Then he’s back on top of her, his weight and heat crushing her most deliciously and brings her body further up the bed with him; she drapes her legs around his hips, hands gripping his arms. Her lust and anticipation collaborate to the point of near madness.

Carrick nips the taut line of her jaw and drives himself into her.

They both groan in unison.

“Oh, fuck.” Carrick mumbles between shaky breaths, his face pressed against her throat. “Fucking hell, Claire, you feel so warm.”

Claire, on the other hand, goes rigid under him. Her mouth hangs open and her world narrows down to the feeling of his cock inside her and the pleasure that builds up again in her abdomen.

This is happening, she thinks, he’s inside her and it feels so amazing. She might as well be crazy for agreeing to do this with him in the first place, but the promise of the thrill beats the doubts.

He starts slow, just the smallest fraction of hips, gently thrusting back and forth in shallow motions. She whines, frustrated and impatient, raising her own hips to meet his, but Carrick’s weight pins her onto the mattress and she can’t fucking move.

“F-faster,” Claire stammers, her molars grinding like toothache.

The bastard smirks, like he’s been anticipating the word coming out of her mouth.

“Beg for it.” His words are punctuated with every unhurried stroke he’s giving her, teasing her and if she’s not in the middle of being fucked right now, she would have kicked him in the balls.

Growling, she swallows her plea by pulling Carrick down for another kiss. This time, she’s the one who does the biting and the sucking, making sure he’s distracted enough and then just like with all the things she does in her life, she takes the matter into her own hands.

With all her strength, she scrambles up, pushes him off of her and knocks him onto his back flat on the bed. When she swings her legs to straddle him, his eyes pop.

“Holy shit, you are feisty.”

“Only cause I’m angry and horny,” she bites off. Angling herself above him and with one hand, guides his shaft back to her opening. “And you- you weren’t doing a proper job fucking me.”

He smirks. “I was trying to wind you up.”

“Fuck you.”

She lowers herself and sinks back onto his cock, relishing in his moans and growls.

“Baby, you’re doing it.” His hands curling around her waist, his head falls back onto the bed, exposing his throat and Claire is so hard-pressed not to bite him there.

Claire ignores his smartassness, naturally, and lifts herself, drops back down. Slamming her hips into his until she’s bouncing on him. Nails clawing at his chest. Finally be able to set a pace she desperately craves for, finally wiping that smirk off of his face.

Under her, Carrick is biting his lip in an effort to not to lose control. His hands are everywhere now; her stomach, her breasts, her neck, her cheeks. Leaving fire on its wake. She might still hate him after this is strange, little arrangement is over but at this juncture, he’s exactly the remedy she needs after everything.

Then Carrick wraps his arms around her and picks up the pace, thrusting into her hard and fast. Claire shakes. She can’t catch her breath, her forehead pressed on his shoulder, her teeth latching onto his skin. Breathing a string of 'fuckfuckfuck’ while he squeezes her ass and continues to fuck her with careless abandon.

"Tobias.” Her moans amplify. She’s close to climaxing again, her legs quivering. Eyes wide shut. “Please, please.” So much for not begging.

He pulls her to him so their foreheads meet. Their lips brush against each other, but they aren’t kissing, merely trading breaths. A hand touches her cheek and her lids flutter open, finding his eyes- those depthless, amber eyes that pretty much lead her to this point, are watching her, pulling her in.

“Say it again,” he encourages darkly, face twists in pleasure. “My name. Say it again.”

She does it again, it comes out as a groaned whisper, repeating it over and over again like a sacred mantra.

Her second orgasm sweeps through her, making her spine arches, it tears a winded moan from her throat and it’s more than enough to trigger Carrick’s own release; fingers digging into the soft flesh of her hips, groaning gutturally.

Panting, sore but sated, Claire collapses on top of his chest, his arm still drapes around her. The rise and fall of his breath lull her to sleep. Before she knows it, he gently rolls her to his side, pulling the covers for them and kisses her on the shoulder, which comes out as… odd for her.

The bed moves and she feels him leaving.

He’s leaving.

He’s leaving.

She doesn’t know why it stings, but it does. But also Claire opts not to pay no mind to it and forces her mind to surrender to sleep that once again tries to take hold.

Claire wishes she doesn’t dream of him that night, but she does.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

It’s way past midnight when she wakes up. The room is dark. The curtains are closed. She’s still naked and sore under the covers, mind reeling in from what has just transpired.

One might ask in which universe does Claire Castelnuovo agree to sleep with Tobias Carrick? Well, apparently they did it in this one and oddly still, she doesn’t regret it. Though she’s still low-key sad that he left her straight after sex, but hey, what can she do about it? This arrangement itself is nothing but a means to an end, anyway, a perverse alternative for him to pay back what he allegedly owes her, she shouldn’t be surprised if he left after the ‘debt’ is paid.

Feeling her mood somehow takes an unexpected dip, she gets us from the bed and gathers her clothes on the floor.

She’s in the middle of zipping up her skirt when the bedside lamp flickers and comes on.

Claire turns around. Carrick, rousing from sleep, looks at her, rubbing his eyes and stifles a yawn. His lips still tinged from her kisses and bites.

“Leaving so soon?” he asks, voice still raspy from sleep and Claire thinks her mouth is hanging open, standing rooted to the spot like a spider on an icicle; frozen in time.

For a moment, she does nothing but stares at him, being rendered speechless. For many times, Tobias Carrick never fails to surprise her. Just when she thinks she has him all figured out, he comes sneaking in through her windows like a thief in the night and it just strikes her, how he really is an uncharted territory for her. Despite her having him pinned under her, exploring the hard planes of his body under the touches just a few hours ago.

The man is like a fucking myth, at this point. She knows him only from stories and her limited time around him, but who is exactly Tobias Carrick? Is he the competitive doctor at Mass Kenmore, the Machiavellian asshole that severed his friendship/relationship with Ethan for the sake of his greed and ambition? Or is he, Tobias Carrick, the man who saves her life, makes her laugh and kisses her shoulder in the afterglow?

She’ll probably never know.

“Yeah, my roommates will probably deploy a search party if I don’t come home tonight,” she replies, distracted, finally finding her own voice back. He nods, feigning disappointment- or is he not? She clears her throat and continues putting on her clothes. “I thought you left.”

He chuckles at the absurdity of her deduction. “And without saying goodbye?” Carrick rolls off of the bed and rises to his feet. He’s already wearing his pants- thank fuck for that- and approaches her. “I may be an asshole, Castelnuovo, but just so you know, my mother raised me better than that.”

So they’re back to their usual last name basis perimeter. That’s good, right? After all of this, she thinks a little familiarity would be nice for her sanity.

“Good to know, then.”

Silence encompasses the room. It’s awkward and overwhelming and it throws her a little off-balance. At the bar, they seemed to know exactly what to say to each other- especially him; but now, even she can sense the hesitation in his gait, at the way he’s looking at her and a faint alarm is trilling her head. Because if he’s making this awkward, she can do a whole lot of worse.

"Oh, before you ask, that makes up for pretty much everything, yeah. I mean, it’s alright.” You fucking dumbass, she thinks to herself, averting his gaze while a smile blooms on his face.

“Good to know, then.” He parrots her words and she huffs a laugh, freely and sweetly, like she’s currently not knee-deep in her problems or she’s just fucked the most incorrigible man that ever exists. He does too, but his gaze lands on her mouth before going back to her eyes.

Another silence passes. It’s time to go.

“I have to go now.”

He nods mutely and moves away so Claire can step past him.

She wears her coat. In the mirror, she still looks thoroughly fucked; her hair’s dishevelled, she smells like him now, but she really needs to go. She promises herself that this will be a one time thing because, Jesus fuck, she’s supposed to be smarter than this. She’s not fifteen anymore, and this is not the summer where she can watch the sunset from the cornfields with her cousins even though his eyes possess the same color.

Yet she walks toward the door in a daze, like she’s forgetting something but can’t pinpoint what it is.

“Can I-”

“Hey, do you-”

She stops, mid-turning, and closes her mouth. She doesn’t realize she’s interrupting him.

“Oh, sorry,” Claire says, embarrassed. “You go first, it’s alright.”

“Can I have your number?” he asks, uncharacteristically hesitant.

She thinks he’s joking or maybe he’s just feigning interest, but one look at his eyes and she can tell that this isn’t smoke and mirrors.

The eyes, chico. They never lie. It’s dumb, but that line from Scarface is the first thing that comes to her mind. That’s why when she hands him her phone, her hand is shaking slightly. She has to bite her lip to stop herself from grinning like a maniac.  

Claire takes a cursory glance at her phone once he returns it. He saved his number solely as t.c. with the water drop, the syringe, the ghost, the eggplant, the firework emoji and she chuckles endearingly, questioning the universe how he can easily get both a rise and a laugh out of her.

“I’ll text you?” Carrick asks again and she nods a little too enthusiastically at it, but what the hell?

“Sure.”

“Alright.” He takes one look at her, steps closer and for a moment, she thinks he might be going to kiss her.

“Goodnight, Claire,” Carrick says instead and she nods, admitting the fact that he’s not going to do it.

“Goodnight to you too, Tobias.” Then pauses at the doorway, feeling surprisingly bold. “I gotta give it to you, though, for someone who’s become the bane of my existence for months, you’re a damn good lay.”

He barks out a laugh, obviously, that Claire can hear all the way down the hall. And she thinks she can get used to the sound.

                                                         fin.

Tag list: @villain-fuckarooni @beckaroo @arfeiniel​ @this-person-is-busy @colossalpainintheass​ @drethanramslay @hatescapsicum @theeccentricbibliophile

[feckin-zicons]

that's why i hate larries, i hate them with all my heart. besides being boring they are hypocrites 🙄

Hey nonnie, sorry its taken me so long to reply but if you’re following me you know I’ve been travelling lately and have been more scatterbrained than usual. Not that I’m ever not scatterbrained, but its been just a little crazier than usual!

Now I wouldn’t go as far to say I hate Larries. After all their delusions can be pretty funny sometimes!

Joking aside, I don’t hate Larries, I love Larries, I’m a Larry, so I really hesitate to tarry the whole group with the same brush. However I do strongly agree with you that there are those who are complete hypocrites. Nothing annoys more more than when Larries ™ treat the other boys, other celebrities, their friends and even family as one more side character to the Larry Show.

In particular when Larries ™ flood comment sections asking or in some cases, ordering people to confirm rumors/the couple being together. The absolute fucking disrespect. Not just because they’re flooding comment sections in videos streams, tweets, what have you, that sometimes have nothing to do with the couple in question, but because its presumptuous and rude as fuck to think they’re owed a coming out- just because they’re fans of the boys.

Stop it. Thats fucking ugly as hell.

While I have no doubt all the boys will one day be out (as referenced by their continued efforts in fighting the closet. I don’t get the sense the boys will just stop at being freed from their contractual obligations). It should and will be on their own terms. Provided they’re not forcibly outed some other way.

Coming out is a deeply personal experience and no one, no one ever, has the right to out someone else. I’ll never not be absolutely furious at the Larries ™ who posted about having ‘receipts’ that would out the boys. Which… tbh weren’t receipts at all but thats a whole other story. I’m also still angry at the reactions after Liams Attitude spread that wouldn’t have been as bad if not for the entitled fandom that peddled ridiculous claims beforehand about Liam confirming Larry to be real.

I mean… What the actual fuck. Setting aside the fandom experience of the time, and boy was it an experience. What right would Liam have confirming Louis and Harry’s relationship? I mean, get some perspective? It doesn’t help that a lot of fandom adults were the ones coming up with, and reblogging those theories and the younger fans ate it up. It would have made more sense for Louis and Harry to do it but idk maybe I’m still out of touch for thinking so. I mean, it felt like every other week someone was talking about Larry coming out. It was such a shit storm oh my god.

Biggest issue I still have with them is that the entitled behaviour hasn’t stopped. For some it seems like, Larry coming out is it for them. Like pack it up, goodbye, shows over, Louis and Harry are gay and in a relationship and everything is rainbows, we get to see cute pictures of them and everyone lives happily ever after.

Yeah, no. Coming out, for anyone, is just the beginning, can’t even begin to imagine what its like for them. They’re still going to need everyones support, and it irritates me that for some fans it seems so fucking conditional.

Time and time again, I’ve seen tweets, and posts, and videos, whatever, going on about Larry coming out and it reads like a fucking wattpad story. Not just that but its always on the assumption by the poster, on the off chance they consider the other 3/5ths of the band and Ziam being a possibility, that Larry will come out first?

What?

I’m sorry but, what?

Everything I’ve seen from the boys tells me they’re all in this together, they support each other and are working through the bullshit as a team. We have all seen the No Judgement music video yes? The merch, posts, double speak etc referencing each other, yes?

I mean, I suppose if you only look at Louis and Harry, like so many do, sure. Only Larry matters, everyone else is a side character in their life.

(Lemme just, scream for a second).

However, that kind of thinking leads them to the wrong conclusions. Like… assuming the SBB/RBB countdown was attributed to nothing, when it counted down to Liam finally being free of Sophia. In the years since, I’ve seen Larries ™ backtrack on claiming the bears had anything to do with the boys, that they weren’t behind it at all, or that they were just trolling the fandom.

You know, despite all the proof otherwise, and some really, really good posts breaking down clues about what the boys were trying to tell us. The moment something might not actually be about Louis and Harry its like all their thinking shuts off. Its frustrating. Really fucking frustrating.

Seriously, fans of the other boys as individulas, not just Ziams, have been talking about the stunts too and how they fit together. Its why we tend to be right, because we’re considering the entire group. They’re still a group. They’re not free until all of them are free.

Just for that Nialls coming out first. Lmao. I’ll call it now. Lets go Niall, whens the baby coming. We all wanna know. Its been years.

Imagine, imagine! Acting like coming out is some race to be won. The fucking audacity.

Go outside and touch fucking grass you absoulte ninny.

I get it, you want to be vindicated, you want to be rewarded for putting your faith in two celebrities being together.

Newsflash you dandelionfluff, its not a race, Louis and Harry coming out isn’t a fucking prize. Thats not what supporting a relationship looks like.

Its worse when someone admits they don’t know much about Ziam or the possibility of Niall being LGBT+, and claim they’re open to it, but then immediately tweet or reblog or sub tweet or tag comment a post or answer an ask from another Larry ™ talking about how Larries ™ are the most marginalized and persecuted group.

???

In what fucking world?

IN WHAT FUCKING WORLD?

If we wanna play that game, boohoo, the media claims Louis and Harry aren’t friends anymore because of crazy shippers. Meanwhile Zayn publicly isn’t friend with anyone and “left” the band… despite the Ziam fandom calling the stunt about either Louis or Zayn “leaving” and getting it down to the exact week (the second article coming out a week before about the Ziam kiss pretty much cemented it for Zayn leaving. Which did a lot to fan the flames of the already rabid fanbase when Ziam got two articles confirming a Ziam kiss over the years and Larry got nada. Like that actually means anything).

Not to mention Larries ™ using the hetties and management tactics against the other parts of the fandom to silence them.

Who cares what the media says anyway!  TPTB, 1DHQ, The Sun, The Mirror, Simon and his minions and their unpaid interns have used the media to split the fandom apart and it worked.

Who the fuck cares if the media calls the 1D stans delusional, you know the truth! The truth it out there and you’ve seen it! The truth is coming! Who gives a damn about what some two bit “journo” who failed out of their creative writing course writes? They get worse by the year. If it wasn’t so pathetic and hilarious I might actually feel embarrassed for them. They can’t even come up with new stories and have just taken to copying old articles, but you’re upset with them??? Give it a rest. Honestly.

The sense of disconnect, entitlement and victimhood of some Larries ™ is absolutely ridiculous.

Oh my god they’re Karens. I’m not trying to be insulting, but thats exactly who they remind me of.

I’m not going to say its a surprise to me that so many in the Ziam fandom are POC, LGBT+, and Neurodivergent and any combination of those, but I am going to say I’ve read a lot of Larry fics that just have Het sex made gay. Those in the Ziam fandom just tend to look at facts in a different way than Larries do due to their life experiences. A interfaith, interracial, relationship where one or both partners fall under the Bi umbrella (not saying Louis or Harry can’t be or aren’t Bi+ but rumors, and the way the fandom markets them, puts them firmly in the gay category) looks very, very different than gay or straight relationship. Both looking from outside and being in one. There’s just different dynamics at play that aren’t often realized or understood by the gays and hets.

Its not a bad thing. All relationships are different. The issue is that theres a lot of biphobia/racism/religious prejudice etc that arises from people being unwilling to understand the inherent differences.

Taking myself for example, I’m bi, like, bi as hell, and I don’t understand how gays and hets only like one gender. I just don’t. Can’t wrap my head around it. If someone asks me to choose one gender over the others to prefer I can’t. Its so stressful. My brain goes into panic mode and it feels like I’m being torn apart. My sense of identity is shaken- its a shit feeling. I just can’t lie to myself like that. If other people feel the same well, its no wonder bi+ have such high rates of depression and suicide. Its not about choosing who to like, there is no choice, I just feel attraction to everyone. Aces, I get. Its similar to being the opposite of what I feel, or not feeling an attraction to someone I’m not interested in. Easy. Gays and hets? I’m completely lost on.

Completely, and I know I’m not the only one who feels that way. But that doesn’t mean I’m not willing to try and understand where they’re coming from. Its alien to me, personally, but I’m not going to shut down the fact, that theres a fuck ton of people who only like one gender or try and make up reasons as to why they’re actually bi+

I digress, none of the boys fall neatly into the gay stereotypes, its just that parts of the Larry fandom have boxed Louis and Harry into certain roles to fit preconceived notions (likely do to them initially fitting in better with the white, sassy, somewhat effeminate twink thats been plastered all over Hollywood as their “LGBT+ representation” for years. Gag), they can understand better, and only look for proof to back up their theories but don’t look at things objectively.

They really need to get out more and make some LGBT+ friends that aren’t on the internet and talk to some gay elders. They need educating that’s not the often sanitized and insulting Hollywood version, that’s all I’m saying.

They made Louis and Harry more palatable for themselves and its… really gross.

I don’t know, I don’t get it.

Some Larries ™ turned the boys into their fandom and fanfiction stereotypes when they’re so much more than that. The Sony leaks should have been enough to dissuade the fandom, and prove that the brand sold to the broader audience is just that- a brand, and yet… Niall only talks about food and golf and Ireland and is only allowed to be straight or ace. If he exists at all its just to be Capt Niall. Liams slow and dumb and depending on the day he’s either Capt Liam or a horrific abusive homophobe. Zayns just The Worst, a unstable drug addict, and the boys hate each other, and they should have kicked him out of the band sooner because he never wanted to be part of them anyway, etc.

It drives me absolutely around the bend some days. They’re real people who don’t owe anyone anything, especially not coming out.

Yes, I think they will. But they’re not obligated to. They can change their minds, I’ll support them regardless of an “official” coming out or not.

Look, a part of me gets it. They wanna be right, they wanna prove the haters wrong, they want to be able to say I called it all along! The vindication will be sweet.

But like, it takes a quick look at someone other than Louis and Harry to realize theres something hinky going on with Liam, Zayn and Niall. Please listen to their fans who have spent just as much time as you have looking into Louis and Harry compiling together evidence.

It might take a weekend to watch the ILYSM and pterodactyl bros videos and a few more hours looking into some Niall blogs, which isn’t much compared to the hours I know they’ve spent looking into Larry. At least then they’ll have enough information to form an opinion on things.

I wonder, for some, what would happen if Larry didn’t come out, or didn’t come out first, or one of the other boys was outed against their will. Because… I don’t know. It seems like some would rather just be proven right at this point.

I get it. We’re tired. Its been eleven long years. But this isn’t a television show were everything can come to a head with a s3 or s4 cliff hanger and fixed in the series finale. Its real life, and they started off as boys trusting industry veterans who never had their best interests at heart.

Iduno. I just want some Larries ™ to take a step out of the echo chamber, realize life isn’t The Larry Show & co. And especially. ESPECIALLY, that every instance were someone, friends, family, co-works, industry peeps etc support the boys they are SUPPORTING THE BOYS, NOT THE FANDOM. They are not “confirming Larry for the fans” they’re doing it to support the couple, not to cater to the fandom. Please stop confusing the two. There’s a huge fucking difference. Learn it.

[sofi220303]

My Weeb Hero - Leviathan (Obey Me!) One-Shot

Summary:

(After the events of Lesson 16)

After having a nightmare of THAT traumatic experience you had recently on the Devildom, you decide to ask Levi for help to forget your nightmare, and with a beautiful gaming night both of you get closer.

*Just read it for the fluff and to see Levi being cute with MC lmao, I suck at doing interesting summaries*

Before We Start:

Hi! Welp, this is the first time I'm publishing a fanfic in my life (Only because it's Levi's birthday and I love him, and wanted to post something about him), so please don't be too harsh on me and I really hope you all enjoy it! Thanks to my beautiful friends that were my beta-readers and also proofread my story (love ya girls!)

I wrote some MC interest and personality basing it on me to make it more realistic, so if you don't like one of the interest I wrote, change it to your own! I also have the same idea written but instead of Levi, with Satan, maybe if you like this one I will publish it, english it's not my first language so sorry if I have some mistakes, and well I think that's all, hope you like it!

My Weeb Hero

— I hate humans, you see. I hate them more than anything in the three worlds— while Belphegor talked all I could feel was the pressure of his cow like tail around my neck, pressing it harder by the minute. I tried to breath, but with every second that passed it became harder. I tried to focus my energy on pushing him away or taking his tail off me, but it was hopeless. My body felt heavier and I didn't have the strength to do anything; there was no way to scape, to save myself.

—...Why is it so much fun that I can barley stand it?! I... I can't contain the laughter! AHAHAHAHAHA!— his eyes that once where sweet and beautiful, that showed sadness and frustration, no, not frustration, but desperation because of being captive, now were shining, almost seemed as they where glowing in the darkness of the room, glowing with passion and satisfaction by my growing pain. They're all I could see with that smile that scared every last bit of me, and that laugh that echoed in my mind, suffocating me even more.

My eyelids became heavier and everything faded into darkness, but I could still see those glowing eyes and creepy smile with his laugh loudly resonating in my head...

Without breath I woke up from my dream turned into nightmare, completely startled by the memory. My body was shaking and my breathing was fast, desperate to get a grasp of air I frantically needed and still felt like missing. With a hand in my heart I closed my eyes to find it beating at an awfully fast speed. I laid back on my bed slowly and tried to focus on my breathing to calm down, without noticing I placed my hand on my face and started laughing, just to start crying the second after. I decided to go to the bathroom to wash my face and get some water... again those nightmares... great.

When I went back to my room I decided to check the hour on my phone... 2:45 am... perfect. I opened the chat on my D.D.D and scrolled down a bit. I'm sure he will be awake, it's not that late and he probably is playing some video-games, binge-watching some anime or rewatching the TSL movies again.

"Leviachan Otaku Lord"

MC: Hey! You up?

Levi: Yup, u ok?

Levi: Thought I heard some noise...

Levi: It's not as if I'm worried or something! Just wondering out of pure curiosity... It would be really unfair if you were with some of my brothers doing a sleepover like the other day -_-'

MC: Hahaha... it's nothing like that, just needed someone to talk to and thought you would be up watching smth or playing some games.

MC: Sorry to bother you since I know you don't like to be disturbed.

Levi: Hmph it's no bother if I'm answering you (-////-)

Levi: I was just watching a show, but it's really not that interesting.

Levi: Did you have a nightmare again?

MC: Yeah... the noise you heard probably was when I went to the kitchen to get something to drink ://

Levi: Do-do you want to come over? If you don't want to it's okay. Maybe is better if we only talk by chat, but it's not everyday that I give someone the opportunity to come into my biggest comfort place, to my beloved "cave" as my brothers would say.

MC: Hahahaha

MC: Okay, okay, if you want it that bad I will go.

MC: As you said it's not everyday that I get invited to your awesome cave lmao

After that, Levi didn't answer again. Gladly, his room was near mine so I didn't have to walk around the House of Lamentation making more noise and risking waking everyone up. When I got there I knocked on his door three times. After a minute or so, the door opened slowly.

—Come in.— Levi almost whispered hiding behind the door. Even though his face was serious, you could see a faint blush on his cheeks. He still wasn't used to people entering his room without coming to drag him out, play video games or watch animes or some movie, ask him a favor or look through his things, so this was still weird for the introverted demon.

Also, he knew how much I liked his room with the ocean theme and felt relaxed by it, so if that would help me get over the scare of the nightmare he would endure it.

—Thanks...— I said softly while sitting on his bed. He took some consoles from his desk and took some games before sitting with me.

—No worries!— he said while hurriedly giving me a console and the games to automatically look to the other side of the room— C-choose a game, we will play some... I thought you would like these ones... — he mumbled still facing the opposite side of the room but more relaxed.

—How about this one?— I took the same old loved Mariokart and showed it to him.

—If that's what you want... it's really a good choice since it's a classic that never disappoints to bring a great time. But don't think I will let you win that easily! Hmph! — he took the game and put the disc's in both consoles.

—It's really cool how you have two Nintendos and copies of the games to play with more people!— I said while preparing my game.

—As an otaku I need the limited edition consoles, and this Ruri-chan theme Nintendo had to be mine even though I already had that one, and the copies are pretty new, since I thought it would be best to lend yo... you know what? Never mind.

Even if he doesn't want to show it he can be really cute when he cares for others, I can't help but smile while thinking that.

—Are you ready to start?— he asks looking directly at me.

—Huh? Oh! Yes...— while concentrating on the loading screen I add— I won't take it easy with you too, I'm not willing to lose!

—Ha! Let's see if you can win to a pro like me, normie— he says surprisingly confidently with a smirk on his face.

After five rounds with two wins and three loses...

—Fuzz buckets! You ARE good at this...— I admit in defeat.

—Told ya, still... you keep up a good match...—he admits shyly— and did you just said "fuzz buckets"?? Really?

—Sorry not sorry! I just love Wizards and got used to saying it thanks to Douxie. Can't help it so don't blame me — I giggled.

—Hmm... I'm in no position to blame though, but why him??

—Because I love him and he is my fave. I don't question you when you say quotes from Henry, do I?

—No... you don't...— he fakes resentment and pouts, simply cute.

Without really thinking who I'm with, I lean on his shoulder. I can feel him getting a bit stiff but he doesn't move away and I take it as an offer to stay there.

—Hey... do you... do you want to talk about what happened? About your nightmare?— he asks a bit embarrassed.

—Just the usual... the demon from that time trying to attack me, but none of you is around to save me... and I can't scape because I'm cornered and I'm not strong enough to run or defend myself...— even though I wanted to tell him about the nightmare, I couldn't bring myself to tell any of them that their own brother is the demon in question, not even to Levi with whom I'm closer to. So I just used the story about that time on RAD when a demon of a lower rank tried to attack me while I walked to my next class. At that moment I was alone because none of the brothers took that class with me, but gladly before something happened, Lucifer, who was passing by, saved me and took care of him. Since then, at least one of the brothers would take the same classes as me, so I'm not alone anymore.

—I swear I will protect you... I might be a filthy otaku, an useless shut-in, but I'm strong enough to protect you. I won't let others hurt you... even on your dreams... so make sure to call me in situations like this. I can be your hero, like the ones on manga, and... I w-want to be your hero!— with a a blush creeping up on his cheeks and the tip of his ears, he declared this with such passion showing he was serious, but in a soft way that shows the regret of not being there at the moment the incident happened.

—Thank you Levi— I reply softly— can I stay here for a bit more?— I ask while closing my eyes and grabbing his left arm close to me. Another shiver comes from him because of that, but again he doesn't complain. I can feel his eyes staring and I'm mostly sure he is even more red than before. With a little movement of his head, guessing he is nodding, and a "hmmh" I finally fall asleep feeling safe.

I didn't have any more nightmares that night.

[mantis-in-the-dirt]

alright then, boys. i have quite a few thoughts and questions to consider about the inbetween and generally karl’s lore from today- i won’t be adding thoughts about the actual tales (the pit), although i might make a post about that later. just be warned, this might be kinda long-ish! i will probably expand on details within these posts later. it’s probably a bit ramble-y, but i,, cannot collect my thoughts better lmao. also, spoilers from the most recent tftsmp, in case that wasn’t clear. 

(also, forgive me if there’s any bad grammar, i’m pretty tired.)

unless i refer to them as cc!, i am talking about the character!

tw for mentions of manipulation, mentions of blood, mentions of the prison.

this is set up like a list, mostly because i will absolutely fail to keep my points in check if i don’t do it this way.

1. let’s start where Karl does- in spawn. he spawns in the inbetween, and based on what we’ve seen, his respawn point does seem to be set within the inbetween. my thoughts on this aren’t super specific, and they tangle a bit with minecraft mechanics, so. if his respawn point is set in the inbetween, that means, with Minecraft logic, he will come back right inside of the inbetween next time he leaves his time travel. what i am assuming is the inbetween is put in the/a world’s overworld, while the other side is through the nether, which means that the set spawn is naturally in the inbetween. unless Karl has a respawn anchor within the inbetween, he is naturally going to spawn there if whatever marks his respawn is destroyed. but other than that- he hasn’t set a spawn point of any kind within the other side, so technically, by Minecraft laws, he should be respawning within the inbetween. this doesn’t necessarily mean anything- for story purposes, it’s likely he’s just in the other side anyways, but it’s interesting to think about.

2. another quite glaring point from tonight’s stream. the inbetween’s threats to force karl to stay. this implies that it somehow has a way to stop him from leaving, which could involve many things. we don’t know the logic of how he joins and leaves the inbetween after he travels, and therefore we don’t know where he is. is the inbetween a separate physical plane? is it in his mind? if it’s in his mind, how would he be restrained? if it’s physical, where is it in relation the the rest of the smp? also, keep in mind this strange physical-mental-no info plane kinda idea. it’ll come up in another point soon.

3. whoo boy, this one. probably the one i’m questioning the most, if i’m being honest. one of the things we have the least answers on.. who the fuck is the inbetween? is it the castle itself, some kind of sentient being who has control and can grow itself? is there someone or something controlling the castle, making it place those books or placing the books themselves? is this force necessarily malevolent? it’s obviously not all powerful, because whoever was working to get karl out had spots that the entity couldn’t see before, and karl managed to get messages. it refers to itself as person, it refers to itself by calling itself ‘i’, implying it is some kind of sentient entity, so what and who is it?

4. i do not think either place is benevolent. neither of them seem even close to truly friendly, and both of them give big red flags in every way they talk. the inbetween is more obvious, because we have quite a bit more info on it. it’s used manipulative techniques, it’s tried to force karl into doing things and to stay. the other side hasn’t done anything specific enough to garner direct dislike, but for multiple reasons, i don’t trust it. this may be a personal opinion, but i think greeting karl like he’s familiar is strange. it said welcome home, which implies a few things (that he’s been there before, that it knows him, that it is somehow familiar with him) that we haven’t learned enough about to properly analyze. i still find it weird, however. (this is less of a concise point and more of a kind of guess/theory.)

5. this is something i said in my last short little post on the tales, but i noticed it once again within this tales, especially with a fewer specific lines. the inbetween continues to use extremely similar and the same methods of manipulation as our green smiley man himself does, which may or may not be important, but i find worth noting. 

6. there was blood in the supposedly secret room. it was a ‘surprise,’ phrased like it was supposed to be some kind of happy thing. first off, there was blood with the sign “don’t stray from the path :]” which is undeniably creepy. of all the ways you could’ve sent a message, that’s horrifying. secondly, this is one of the first (the first, possibly?) physical threats of violence within the inbetween, and we’ve observed quite often in this fandom the difference between physical and mental attacks. last, where did the blood come from? we’ve seen no physical bodies other than karl himself and the many copies of him. did something hurt the karl copies? if not, whose blood is it, and how is there so much of it all over the room?

7. this is likely a complete coincidence, or even if it isn’t it won’t matter to lore, but the blocks that we’ve seen of the other side are mostly the same as the prison. there’s a lot of blackstone and possible obsidian and such.

8. the inbetween and the other side seem almost inverse of each other. each different part of them that we are able to compare so far seems to be exactly opposite from each other. from the obvious things- the color schemes, the flowers- to the less obvious details- the way they speak to karl. the build of the other side so far seems to be foreboding and creepy, kinda strange and unusual type of build. the build of the inbetween looks peaceful and calm, very gentle and pretty. it’s obviously purposeful, and i think there are some connections with the nether (the other side) vs. the overworld (the inbetween.) 

9. there are still the karl’s wandering around all over the inbetween, and we got more information on them today. they are versions of karl who have ‘lost themselves’ and become stuck here, cursed to wander the halls of the castle together. this is a very, very interesting idea. first off, let me be clear. time travel is a tricky thing, and depending on the world and the lore of how cc!karl has decided he wants to do it. logically, these copies of karl cannot be from the past, because if they are stuck, then karl himself would be stuck, and none of the rest of the copies would be there. this then implies that either versions of himself from the future have come back and gotten stuck, and/or that there is some form of alternate reality talk coming into play here. also, to go back into the previous point, are there going to be any kind of flip-side karl’s in the other side, or are there going to be no entities at all?

10. who is warning karl out of the inbetween? the inbetween has shown us no people other than karl and his copies, but someone or something is putting the books there to warn him, and something obviously seems to know that the inbetween isn’t right. however, is this force actually trying to be helpful? is it trying to warn him away from the inbetween because they want to help him away from malevolent places, or do they just want him to come to the other side? is there some force within the castle that holds enough power to put out books with differing opinions to the inbetween’s books, or is someone manually setting out these stories?

11. where is the inbetween, and how does karl get there? we haven’t been given specific information on how karl arrives or leaves the inbetween, or where the inbetween is. is it an entire other dimension? is it within karl’s mind, or is it in a physical plane? what does it mean that karl has gone into another dimension in wherever he is? will this cause difficulties in leaving or coming back to this area in general? adding onto this with a small idea, we have been given the ‘other side’ and the ‘inbetween.’ does this imply that there is a third side, and if so, what is it? is it something we already know, like the dreamsmp, or is it a completely new world?

12. i do not think the other side is a good thing. i do not think it is going to turn out well for karl. however, it currently seems to be the better place for karl to be. it seems to be the ‘good’ out of the two, just from what we’ve seen. despite this, it seems to fight all these common stereotypes of being ‘good.’ it’s dark and scary and seems very dreary. does this or will this reflect on the dream smp itself? does it mirror anything that the dreamsmp does with stereotypes or characters?

alright then, that’s it! if you made it to the end, i hope you agreed with a couple of these points, and i hope a couple of these questions are ones other people are having as well.

sorry for the ramble essay lmao 

[winterscaptain]

Now that I've started putting words to paper, I've come to realize that keeping the timeline of Criminal Minds straight is a massive headache. I'm cursing getting inspired to try a reader insert across the show. How the heck did you go about the planning for your own timeline?

it’s a pain in the ASS and i LIVE AND DIE by my spreadsheets. i have a bunch of them that i use to keep track. i have some screenshots and more explanation under the cut. this turned into.....a Lot and this is definitely not necessary, but all tools that help my little brain!!

here are some spreadsheet samples!!

^^^ this is my master calendar. i have a printed copy on the wall of my bedroom that i annotate frequently, and it’s my favorite excuse to get out of my writing chair when i get stuck. this also helps me visualize “dead space” where fics are just...absent. like in 2019, for example. which is, rigth now, totally empty. 

it’s organized by week, with the usual month placements marked out. the blue ribbons mark ongoing things i need to consider when writing - mostly for continuity

^^^ i fondly call this one “kid sheet” because it’s a master of all the kids and what the fuck they’re doing. aimz helped me build this and it’s been a lifesaver because there are SO MANY OF THEM and they do DIFFERENT THINGS

(sometimes i curse myself)

^^^ this is the MASTER master of all the fics. i use different colors and conditional formatting (which is a lifesaver) - the dark purple/pink is for stuff i’ve already posted, blue is for finished and scheduled, green is for WIPs, and baby pink is for not started. all i have to do is add a row and fill out the “status” column and the conditional formatting does the work for me.  the far columns are something i added later, when i realized i needed to keep track of revisions. 

fuck that was a lot i’m so sorry pls let me know if you want any more info on any of these sheets. i have tabs for the idea form and the tag list that auto-update whenever someone fills out the google form :) i also have a fun one where i put all the data so i can look at the pretty graphs!!

ALRIGHT SO NOW THE TIMELINE

the way i started was kind of haphazard. i hadn’t finished the series when i wrote what would become the first installment (day off) so i had to kind of retcon it when it became a big thing. here was my (not so) quick rationale: 

reader (who wasn’t called ‘mom’ generally yet lmao) wouldn’t be much more than 40 for the last kid (that didn’t exist yet - elliot was a creation of the ajf ‘verse along the way) so i wanted to give myself a little wiggle room 

so i decided mom would be born in 1982, because that would put her at about 25 joining the bureau in 2007, which is about the time jj joined, so it was already plausible. in a perfect world, i would have mom from the beginning of the series, but i just couldn’t swing it. 

than i said “okay there are three extra kids. there has to be time for those pregnancies, plausible dating/marriage/misc courtship timeline, also accounting for haleys death.” those were....some variables to figure out and i took pen and paper to it for HOURS

so i worked out the birthdays in 2016 and 2018 for isaac and the girls, figuring hotch started dating beth about two years and change after haley died (so late 2011, early 2012), a long dating period where they could really get married any time, and then a baby. whcih would put day off in about 2020. that was my benchmarker for a while. 

i also had to fuck around with aaron’s age because in canon his birth year is sus (could be 1971, could be 1966. both are on papers somewhere), so i pushed it to 1968 (which is still pushing it to the younger side, frankly, but whatever) and called it a day

the rest of it just kind of came up as i went through it? that’s the nice thing about writing out of order - i can push and shove and wiggle things where i want them most of the time. i also!! stopped doing fics that cover huge swaths of time (for the most part) because i always want to give myself space to add stuff without a full-on revision. 

whew. okay. so god bless you if you managed to get this far. i am more than happy to elaborate on anything if you have more specific questions, and i hope i answered this in a... i dunno... helpful way??

[illfoandillfie]

5 Simple Rules for a Successful Fake Relationship: The Proposal

Pairing: Ben Hardy x Reader

Summery: Your's and Ben's agents approach you about pretending to date in order to boost interest in your new movie.

Warnings: Nothing for this chapter other than some swearing maybe? Things may get a little spicy in later chapters though.

Words: 5843

AN: This fic was written for El @laedymoon​ for her 1K celebration! I took the trope 'fake dating' and this was the result! Honestly fake dating is one my my fave tropes and I've been wanting to try my hand at it for a while so this was so much fun to write! Originally it was meant to be a one shot but when have I ever been good at sticking to plans lmao? Instead it'll probably end up as a three or four part series, maybe with an epilogue as well, who knows.

I’d also like to point out I started writing this months before we got those photos of Ben and Olivia so this was in no way inspired by anyone’s theories about whether or not their relationship is a PR stunt and I’m not particularly interested in that kind of talk.

Taglist: @laedymoon​​  @dtfrogertaylor​​   @ezmina98​​  @vee-ndetta​​ @atomic-watermelon​​ @kellypenac​​ @labessieisallama​​ @deakyclicks​​ @jennyggggrrr​​ @drowseoftaylor​​  @hannafuckingsucks​​  @i-cant-hangout-im-drumming​​ @queenmylovely​​ @supersonicfreddie​

You’d known fake celebrity relationships were a thing that happened, you just never expected to be approached about one. But, here you were, sat next to Ben in an office usually reserved for producers meetings, a slight frown on his face as he listened to your agents explain how beneficial it would be if the public believed you were a couple.  “It’ll be good for the movie,” your agent, Mary, said matter-of-factly, “Studies show that if people – particularly women ages 15 – 45, the exact demographic we’re targeting – believe a real romance sprouted during the course of filming a movie, they are 78% more likely to see the movie. Plus, your names in the tabloids mean more exposure for both of you which means more offers in future, no matter how well this movie does in the box office. It’s all about being seen, people knowing your names.”  “Are you serious?” Ben asked slowly, glancing to you, as if trying to determine your reaction.  “Look, Ben, obviously we can’t force you or Y/N to do this,” his agent, Peter, introduced to you moments before, said, “the movie has already started filming and everyone appreciates your opinions, so saying no isn’t going to affect your jobs. But,” he paused, making sure the words were getting through to you both, “we strongly recommend you consider it. There are enough pros to make it worthwhile and it would only have to last until a week or two after the premiere. We can give you the rest of the day to think it over and make your decisions, but we will require an answer by tomorrow morning. If you agree, we can discuss terms and get everything in order to run the first story early next week.” 

You and Ben left, tempted to laugh at the strangeness of your morning.   “Think I need a coffee after that. You wanna come over to my trailer for a cup?”  “Yeah, okay, sounds good,” you followed him quietly for a moment, thinking over the conversation you’d just been part of, “What do you think?”  “About what? Coffee? You know I love it,”  “Not coffee, the whole pretending to date thing,”  “Oh that,” you could almost hear his eyes roll.   “You don’t think it’s worth it?”  He paused.  “Saying no won’t hurt my feelings,” you nudged his shoulder, hoping to ease his obvious discomfort, “it is a weird situation.”  “Weird is an understatement. And weren’t you with that Luke guy, what would he say about it?”  “He’ll say nothing since we’re not seeing each other anymore,”  “Wait, what?”  “Yeah that lasted like three dates and went nowhere, I haven’t seen him in weeks.”  “Oh, sorry.”  You shrugged, “What’s there to be sorry for, he was boring. Anyway, we were talking about you and me.”  “Right, that.” Ben opened the door to his trailer and waved you inside, following you over the threshold, “What do you think about it?”  “I’m not opposed to it. We already spend a lot of our time pretending to date anyway.”  Ben chuckled as he flicked the small kettle on, grabbing your two mugs and the instant coffee.  “Plus it would be good to get our names out there a bit more. And we're friends, right?” After the weeks of pre-production costume fittings and script read-throughs you certainly thought you were friends and hoped Ben did too.  “Of course we’re friends doofus,”  “Thanks dweeb. But that means it'll be fun getting to hang out and stuff.”   “So, wait, you think it’s a good idea?”  “Well it can’t hurt, can it?”  Ben frowned, forehead creased, “Don’t you think it’s all a bit, well, daft? As if us dating, real or not, would really have an impact on the movie, I think that’s bullshit. Plus, y’know, the work we’d have to put in to making it seem real or whatever. That’s just inviting extra stress into our lives and extra work which it doesn’t sound like we’d be getting paid for. Acting’s fun but I don’t want to spend every waking moment doing it.”  “Well it wouldn’t be every waking moment would it? Just the ones when they had photographers around. They’ll get a few photos of us leaving set holding hands or out having dinner together and spin it into a big romantic story and all we’d have to do is hold hands and have dinner. And you can’t call bullshit when they had actual statistics to back them up.”  “It sounds like you’re trying to convince me.”  “No, if you don’t want to I don’t mind, but I also don’t see anything wrong with it. And I think you should actually think about it instead of writing it off instantly.”  “So if I said I was into it, you’d want to?”  You shrugged, “Yeah. I want this movie to do well, I want this job to go somewhere. And if I have to date you to make that happen I will. That sounded better in my head. I just mean that I’m happy to pretend to date you, even if I wouldn’t in real life, no offence.”  “I’m a little offended,” he chuckled, “but really can’t argue with that can I?”  “If you’re not comfortable with it, say so and we’ll tell them no,”  Ben paused, staring at you as he considered what you’d said, quiet for so long you were sure he was going to say he wasn’t interested. You were about to put him out of his misery and tell him you didn’t want to anymore when he spoke up.   “They did say it would be good for the movie and out careers,”  “Someone’s coming around,” you sing-songed, taking the mug he offered you.  “Alright, I admit, maybe not as awful an idea as I first thought. There are…some pros anyway. And I guess we can hear the terms and then make up our minds properly.”  “Aww, looks like I got myself a boyfriend,” 

The next morning you found out what you were in for if you did agree to it. Once again both of your agents were waiting in the office but this time a third person was with them when you arrived.  “Y/N, Ben, take a seat. This is Barry, he’s a representative from Paramount Pictures.”  Barry, with his salt and pepper hair and well cut suit, leaned forward in his seat to shake Ben’s hand and then yours with a pleasant greeting.  “Well,” Mary spoke up, “have you made a decision?”  Ben looked to you before he spoke, “It’s a tentative yes from both of us. We’d like to hear a bit more about it before we fully agree but, so far, it sounds okay.”  “Glad to have you on board,” Barry said, reaching into his bag and pulling out a manila folder full of paper.  “In that case, the terms,” Peter said, glancing around to make sure everyone was ready, “If you do agree, we’ll need you to sign some paperwork stating you understand your obligations and all that, so take a copy of these,” he took two small stapled documents from Barry, handing you each one, before passing another to Mary, “just so everyone has all the info at hand.”  “Are these the terms?”  “Yes. Don’t worry, we’ll explain, but it’s all laid out in there if you need clarification.”  “There’s more pages than I was expecting,” Ben said, already sounding like it was becoming too much work to worry about.  “You don’t have to worry about the last few pages, it’s mostly just legalese. Essentially, you’ll be required to act like a couple in public. That’s really all there is to it, though contractually it’s a little more complex.”  “What does that mean?”  “We just need you both to agree to perform specific relationship type moments that we can sell. For instance, Y/N, we will need you to be spotted by paparazzi leaving Ben’s apartment a couple of times. Or vice versa. It is the 21st century afterall.”  “You mean like a walk of shame?” you asked, glancing at the paper in your hand.  “That’s not the official term on the contract but it’s more or less correct. You’ll need to change clothes, make it look like you stayed the night even if you didn’t really.”  “Wouldn’t it be more traditional to wear the previous day’s gear?”  “Perhaps but if you’re in the same clothes as the day before the paparazzi can’t sell the photos as easily because they can’t prove they were taken on different days. We want to make these photos easy to sell and easy to circulate. To that end, some paparazzi and gossip blogs will be tipped off by the studio and hopefully word will spread as the buzz around you gets stronger.”  “There will also be required dates, of course. At least one of them needs to take place at the French restaurant Boucher because they have a partnership with the studio. There is also a clause about an argument, provided people become interested in your relationship and we keep it going all the way to the premiere.”  “Wait, an argument?” Ben flipped through his papers, trying to find the right section.  “You just have to be caught arguing, or at least looking like you’re angry and about to fight, just so we can sell the whole trouble in paradise storyline.”  “People like conflict,” Mary shrugged, “Otherwise all we need is the two of you to act like a couple in public, maybe a few social media posts, from now until a week after the theatre release. After that you’re free to ‘break up’, though you will also need to sign a non-disclosure agreement which will stop you from talking about it for a few years. We’ll organise a few magazines and gossip sites to run stories about the split and, depending on how the public react to your story, may later run some Ben and Y/N, back together question mark type pieces, entirely fabricated of course.”  “You will attend the premiere together and, obviously, do press together. We will tell reporters not to ask about your personal lives, so no one suspects the relationship to be fake, though a few questions may slip through. Though we don’t expect this movie to earn any award nominations since it’s not being marketing for any there may be some later down the track. In that case we may ask you to extend your relationship long enough to attend the ceremonies together, provided you aren’t working on other projects at the time.”  “The only other requirements are that, a few times a week you allow yourselves to be seen in public. Hand holding, kissing, really sell the whole fallen in love thing. That’s it really.”  “And we can’t even tell our families?”  “One leak is all it would take to have this revealed. You tell your mum who accidentally lets slip to the neighbour who sells it to a magazine. And if it’s revealed it could be harmful when it comes to box office numbers, which is the exact opposite of what we want. But enough of these have been done so that we know how to manage them, and all you have to do is keep quiet about it and act like you’re in love. Easy. Are you both on board?”  Barry, who’d been quiet throughout the meeting, leaned forward expectantly.  You already knew what to say, "I’m in if Ben is,”  Ben chewed his lip as he skimmed over the paper in his hands again. He sighed and raised his eyes to where Barry sat, waiting.  “I don’t know I-”  You’d seen it coming, his answer. Really it wasn’t much of a surprise. Ben didn’t strike you as the sort of person to go in for schemes like this and he’d been hesitant from the second it was suggested. You heard him sigh again as his gaze landed on you and you wondered if he thought less of you for wanting to be part of it.  “Okay. I’m in.”  You were a little stunned by his change of heart but you were the only one. Everyone else in the room seemed relieved and a little frantic, Barry reaching back into his bag, Mary and Peter talking over each other to assure you both that you’d made the right choice.  “Glad to hear that, Ben,” Barry was saying as he pulled out another folder of documents, “Now, we’ll need you to both to sign here.” 

After shooting was done for the day you accompanied Ben to a small pub for a drink. Mary and Peter had left the meeting on their phones making hurried calls to get photos of the two of you leaving the set together. You’d jumped a little as Ben grabbed your hand before realising why his fingers were linked through your own. It was warm and he didn’t let you go until you reached the pub, the snap of cameras audible as you walked down the street. You found a booth while Ben headed to the bar, returning a little later with a drink in each hand.   “One G and T for my girlfriend,” he laughed as he put the drink in front of you and slid into the seat opposite.  “Y’know if you told me last week that I’d have had a boyfriend before we finished filming and that it was you, I would have laughed.”  “God me too. Our jobs are so bizarre. Literally what other profession would encourage you to pretend to date?”  You laughed and pulled out the papers you’d been given that morning, “And who’d have thought there’d be so many contractual requirements.”  “We should add our own set of rules. Like just so we’re clear about what we’d be uncomfortable doing or whatever.”  “Safewords?”  “Get your mind out of the gutter. Christ, you fake ask a girl out and suddenly all she can think about is sex.”  “My mind was in the gutter long before we were set up.”  He let out a huff of laughter and shook his head, reaching for his glass.  “I know what you mean though. We should definitely define some things,” you grabbed your bag and began digging through it for a pen. When you found it, you turned the papers over giving you a blank canvas to work on, “Firstly sex.”  “Should have known,”  “May as well start with the big one. Rule 1: No Sex. Completely off the table.” you took a sip of your drink as you began jotting it down.  “Your wank game strong?”  The conversation was interrupted as you choked on your drink, finally recovering enough to splutter, “excuse me?”  “Well it sounds like we might be together for a while. Can’t go on any tinder dates or anything since that would look like cheating. You sure you can last that long?  “100 per cent.”  “Alright, if you’re sure. Rule one, no sex.”  You finished writing it down, rolling your eyes, “What about PDAs? We have to do some but is there anything you’d be uncomfortable with?”  “I’m not really one for like public make out sessions,”  “Thank god, me neither.”  “Okay, good. What about cuddling and that kind of thing. Man this is weird to talk about,”  “Yeah, is a bit. I can do some cuddling in public but y'know, nothing too much. Hugs are fine, an arm around my shoulders is fine. Holding hands is obviously okay.”  “What about an arm around the waist?”  “Hmmm….maybe. Yeah, I think I’d be okay with that. But your hand never goes below my lower back. I will have no arse grabs or pinches or hands in my back pocket.”  “Wasn’t planning on that but good to know. Does cuddling include lap sitting?”  “Absolutely not.”  “Okay, strong boundaries, I respect that. You going to write all that down?”  “Rule 2: PDAs kept respectable and to a minimum. And rule 3: hands above the belt at all times. What about our families and friends?” you asked as you made notes on acceptable PDAs, “chances are we’re going to have to deal with them at some point since they’re going to think it’s real.”  “Okay, um, how about…no meeting anyone unless there’s a reason like a family gathering you’d be expected to bring a partner to. And if that does come up we can work out a game plan then.”  “Make sense. Rule 4: No families unless no escape.” 

By the time you left the pub, your list of rules tucked into your bag, it was quite late.   “Hey, you wanna crash at mine tonight?” Ben asked, “we can text Peter and Mary, let them know so they can organise paparazzi for the morning.”  “Tonight? I don’t have a toothbrush or a change of clothes or anything.”  “We’ll pop into a shop and buy you a new toothbrush, should probably get you one for my place anyway since apparently you’ll be staying over more than once. And I’m sure I’ve got something you can sleep in.”  “And tomorrow? Can’t wear this again in case we get photographed.”  “I’ll give you something and then I’ll drop you home in the morning,” he shrugged.   “I guess that would work,”  “C’mon, it’ll be like a sleepover. Stay up late and talk about boys, have things devolve into a sexy pillow fight, sleepover stuff.”  “And you say my mind lives in the gutter.”  “That’s not a no,”  “Alright, I’ll crash at yours. Closer to here than mine is anyway.”  “Awesome,” he grinned at you, “c’mon, this way….babe?”  “Didn’t sound so convincing there, Ben,” you snorted.  “You should have used a pet name then, instead of my actual one. And I was just testing the waters, what’d you think?”  “Babe’s okay. As long as we don’t get into weirdly cutesie things like turtle dove or snookums.”  “You don’t want me to call you snookums? How about cuddle bunny? Pumpkin pie?”  “Oh fuck off,”  “Think you mean fuck off honey bear.”  “Rule 5: Standard pet names only!” 

As much as he clearly enjoyed teasing you, Ben made sure you had a good time with him. He took your hand again but it was only so he could pull you into the warmth of a small Chinese restaurant. It was one he seemed to regularly visit judging by the way the man at the counter knew Ben’s order straight away. He seemed a little surprised when Ben asked to add extra dishes, eyes darting to your entwined hands, and then back to Ben’s face, but he said nothing, just cheerily gave Ben the new price.  “What was that about?” you asked as you walked the last block to Ben’s door, each of you carrying a bag, his full of food and yours supplies from the grocery store, “the look he gave you when he saw me?”  “Oh, that’s nothing. I used to go to that place a lot with my ex and then we broke up and I kept going on my own cause it’s close and it’s fucking good food. But, um, they know me pretty well and I guess it’s been a while since I took a girl there.”  “Well I’m flattered that you chose me to be part of this touching moment,” you laughed and followed Ben to his front door, taking the second bag from him so he could pull his keys from his pocket and let you in. You’d never been inside Ben’s place before so you let him lead you down the hallway towards the kitchen, taking charge of pulling everything from the bags as Ben got out plates and cutlery.  “Oh shit, hang on gotta text Mary and Peter,”  You took over dividing up the food as Ben dug his phone out of his pocket. A few seconds after he’d sent the message and put his phone down a ding made him snatch it back up again.  “Peter says there’ll be someone here to snap us while we leave. They want us to kiss if possible. Guess it’s really started then,”  “Guess so. Can I ask one thing?”  “Sure,” he said it slowly, almost nervously.  “Why’d you change your mind about this? I thought for sure you’d say no.”  “Oh, that. I don’t know, I guess I figured it wouldn’t hurt, especially if it was going to benefit the movie. C’mon, don’t want this to go cold,”  You weren't sure you believed him but you let him shrug off the question as you picked up your plate and followed him into the living room. The next couple of hours were spent eating and watching trashy reality tv shows, making jokes at their expense. You and Ben kept talking long after the show ended, until he realised how late it was getting.  “Better turn in otherwise I won’t get up in the morning,” he laughed.  “Yeah, probably a good plan,” you stretched out on the couch, placing a cushion under your head.  “C’mon, I’ll show you to your room.”  “You mean I’m not sleeping on the couch?”  “Oh my god you’re a dork,” he threw another cushion at you, “I have a spare room you can use.”  “Well I didn’t know that,” you laughed as you pushed yourself to your feet, following him back down the hallway towards a closed door you hadn’t noticed before.  “Nah, you’re all good. It’s honestly mostly used by my friend Joe when he’s travelling over this way. There’re clean sheets in the linen press in the bathroom which is the next door on the right, and extra blankets in the cupboard just there. Also watch the blinds if you try to close them, they can be a little stiff. If there’s anything else you need let me know, my bedroom is at the end of the hall, near the living room.”  “Some PJs would be good, if it’s no trouble.”  “Oh right, yeah of course, give me a second.”  You dropped your bag in a corner of the room and then popped into the bathroom to grab some sheets. Ben came back with an old t-shirt and some flannel pants.  “These are mine so they’ll probably be a bit big but they’ll be fine for the night. And they’ll look good for the camera in the morning.”  “Thanks,”  “That everything?”  “Think so, night Ben,”  “Night, snookums.”  “Rule five mister,”   Ben just laughed, pulling your door shut behind him.  

Waking up in Ben’s spare room was mildly confusing. The bed faced a different direction than yours did, the blinds blocked out too much of the morning light, and the sheets felt different. But the previous night came back to you and then the reason you were staying at Ben’s did too. It made you too nervous to go back to sleep, too restless to stay there, so you got up and stumbled to the door, opening it just in time to see Ben leaving the bathroom.  “Morning,” he groaned with half shut eyes and sleep mussed hair, “you want a coffee?”  “Please. Thanks.”  He yawned, acknowledging your answer with a nod and left the bathroom to you. When you were done you found him in the kitchen with a steaming mug of coffee in his hands and a second on the bench in front of him. You took it gratefully, letting the warm caffeine wake you up.”  “Breakfast? I can offer you toast or cereal unless you wanna wait for pancakes to cook.”  You shook your head, “Don’t normally eat breakfast,”  Ben looked aghast, “You know breakfast’s important, right?”  “Shhh, lemme wake up before you start lecturing me,”  Ben smiled into his own mug, falling silent until you’d downed half your drink, “You good now? Alert?”  “Close enough. Please don’t tell me about breakfast though.”  “I wasn’t going to. There was another text from Peter this morning.”  “What’d it say?”  “Well, a photographer will be here around nine-ish ready for us, but they said he’ll stay for as long as we take.”  “Okay.”  “And, um, he was very careful in how he worded it, but they want us to look like we fucked. Also I told them I’d take you home so there may be someone waiting for us there too, he never got back to me on it.”  “Shit, okay. Umm, guess I’ll just wear this then?” you indicated the pyjamas you’d borrowed, “might lose the pants though, help sell it a bit more.”  “Yeah, guess so,” Ben cleared his throat and took a sip of coffee, his eyes firmly fixed over your shoulder.  “What time is is?”  “Uhhhh,” he glanced at the oven, “Twenty past eight.”  “God I haven’t been up this early on a weekend in months.”  “Not one for farmers markets or anything then?”  “Not really. Much prefer lying in bed doing nothing.”  “Me too,”  “We’re meant for each other,” you laughed, “did you want to have a shower or anything?”  “Nah, you can if you want though,”  “Might as well wait until I get home. But I am gonna clean my teeth, especially if we have to kiss.”  “Maybe mess up your hair too, make it look like you didn’t sleep much.”  “Well how could I when you’re such a good lover,”  “I know you’re joking but if anyone asks, I’m incredible. You came like three times.”  “Did I now?”  “Of course.”  “Good thing no one’s gonna ask then, don’t think I’m great at lying.”  “You’re an actress, Y/N. Besides, it’s not really a lie, I am that good. You just haven’t experienced it personally.”  You poked your tongue out at Ben as you stood and headed towards the bathroom again but you did as he’d suggested and messed your hair up as much as you could. 

“How do I look?” you ask Ben when you were done.  “Gorgeous,” he said, eyes raking over every inch of your appearance from the ruffled hair to the hint of panda eyes you’d manufactured with your eyeshadow to the slightly unbuttoned flannel shirt and missing pants.  “But do I look like I’ve been thoroughly fucked?”  “Oh, right, umm, yes I think so,”  “You do? I feel like theres something missing.” You darted back into the bathroom to look in the mirror again, “Oh! I know. Might be taking it a bit far though.”  “What is it?” Ben asked, following you and watching you in the mirror.  “What if you gave me a hickey?”  “Y/N, I-”  “Yeah, I know, that’s a weird thing to ask. Don’t worry, I think we’ll be fine without it.”  Ben’s cheeks puffed up with air that he slowly let escape his lips, “no, you’re right, if I’d really slept with you last night I would have marked you up a bit. A hickey will definitely make it look more authentic.”  “It’s not totally inappropriate for me to ask?”  “No, no, we have to make it look legit, it’s a good suggestion. Here, I’ll uhh,” he stepped in close, one hand tentatively winding around your waist to pull you back against him, the other moving to push your hair aside. His breath was hot as he leaned into your neck. You saw him glance at your reflection, eyebrows slightly furrowed, but then his lips were on your skin, sucking at you until a bruise formed. Your own breath quickened with the contact but you knew it was just because he’d found a particularly sensitive spot and it had been a while since anyone had handled you like that. It was still just Ben and it was still part of your jobs. But all the same you let your eyes slip shut and hummed at how nice it felt. You were almost disappointed when it was over. Ben stood there for a moment, head bent over your neck, long enough to take a deep breath, but then he seemed to collect himself, taking a quick step back.  “Will that do?”  “It’s great Ben, really ties the whole look together.”  Ben returned your smile but it didn’t quite reach his eyes, “Good. Good. Okay then, I’ll umm, what time is it?”  “Just after nine,” you said, glancing at your phone, “wonder if the photographer is here yet.”  “I think I will jump in for that shower actually, by the time I’m done he definitely will be.”  “Okay,”  “Make yourself comfortable though, watch some TV or something.”  “Alright. Thanks for being so cool about all this. I know you’re a little sceptical about the benefits and everything.”  “It’s fine, Y/N, no need for any of that.” He smiled again as you left the bathroom and the door shut behind you, but it still seemed off.  

You settled onto the couch to flick TV channels, pausing at a breakfast news show and then at some kids cartoon you didn’t recognise, only stopping when Ben entered the room, clean and dressed.   “Hey, I was wondering,” you said, turning towards him, “should I give you a hickey as well?”  “No,”  You were a little taken aback by how quickly he’d answered.  “I mean, I think that’d be overkill. Keep it up our sleeves for next time, yeah?”  “Okay, yeah, sure,”  “Is he there?”  “I think so.”  Ben walked towards the window and twitched the curtain aside just enough to peek out, “Yeah, looks like him. Big camera pointing at my front door.”  “Okay,” your heart began to beat a little faster, “show time then,”  “Show time.” Ben nodded as he turned back to you.  “Do we have a plan? I kinda wish I had a script right about now,”  Ben laughed a little and you thought he seemed more himself, “I think you should go out first so they can get a good clean shot and then I come out after, maybe with my hand on your back?”  “Sounds good,”  “Okay, umm, I’ll lock the door and when I turn around you kiss me and then I’ll open the passenger door for you and we’ll drive to your place.”  “Don’t bother opening my door. I’m not big into that kind of gesture, plus I think if we were actually being caught by the paparazzi, we’d be getting into the car as quick as possible. Maybe throw a look his way like you aren’t happy about being photographed just so it doesn’t seem too staged.”  “Okay, no opening doors, noted.”  You shrugged, “I just think it’s a bit old fashioned and unnecessary,”  “I’ll keep that in mind for our dates. You ready to do this?”  You nodded and stood up, leading the way to the front door. Ben collected his keys and wallet and placed a hand on the lower part of your back, your signal to open the door and step outside.   “Kinda wish I had pants on,” you said softly, “It’s a bit brisk,”  Ben chuckled as he followed you out, “We’ll put the heating on in the car for you,” he turned to lock the door. You watched him, fingers gripping the key a little tighter than he perhaps normally would, and as soon as he began to turn back around you were moving towards him, one hand thrown around his neck, the other in his hair as your pressed your lips to his. His hand found your back again, pulling you in close as he kissed you back fiercely, as if he were unwilling to let you go after such a good night together, the kiss of a man falling in love. For half a second you forgot it was an act. And then he was gone, his nose brushing yours briefly before there was space between you. You felt a little dazed with Ben looking at you so softly but you took a deep breath and reality came back to you. With another breath your turned and headed towards the car, able to hear the rapid click click click of the camera. You shot a look towards the noise and then got into the car, Ben hopping into the driver’s seat about a second later.  

“You’re a good actor,” you said before silence could settle between you, “I already knew that, of course, but the kiss was really good. Almost completely believable.”  “As long as it’s believable enough in the photos,”  “I’m sure it will be. I think we pulled it off.”  Ben nodded, “Yeah. You still chilly?”  “Little bit,”  He reached over and twisted one of the dials blindly, warm air suddenly washing over your goosebump covered legs, “better?”  “So much, thanks.”  “I think he might be following us,”  “You did tell them we were going to mine, s’pose he’ll be trying to grab a couple of shots of us there.”  “Yeah, probably.”  “Should we come up with another game plan? Maybe you walk me to my door, we stand there talking for a bit, saying goodbye. I stay and watch you leave before I go inside.”  “Perfect. Is another kiss part of the goodbye?”  “Careful Ben, you sound almost like you want to kiss me,” you laughed, “but yes, think it needs to be.” 

It went completely according to plan. By the time you were getting out of the car the photographer had pulled up outside your house, his camera sticking out the window of his car so he didn’t miss his shot. The camera clicked as Ben took your hand and you led him to your door.  “Well, guess that’s it for today. I did have fun with you last night, even if it wasn’t the kind of fun everyone else will think it was.”  “Yeah, me too. Happy to have you stay anytime you want to be photographed again. Maybe we’ll get you some PJs that can live at mine though.”  “Probably for the best. If this goes well I can see them wanting us to do it again soon.”  “Oh definitely. They’ll probably have notes for us so we can get an even better performance next time. You ready to wow them with another kiss?”  “Lay it on me, babe,”  “Anything you want, snookums,”  You groaned but before you could protest too much Ben was kissing you again, softer than before, no longer trying to convince you to stay, just trying to prolong the moment before the goodbye. It left you a little breathless as he cupped your cheek, leaving his hand there when he pulled away. As you opened your eyes you saw him bite his lip and then he leaned in to leave you with a final chaste peck before his fingers slipped from your skin and he was walking away. You let out a long exhale as you watched him go, waving as the car took off. Once you were alone inside, the door firmly shut behind you, you laughed at how ridiculous the whole arrangement was. But at least Ben was a good kisser. Not too firm, not too wet, just the right amount of tongue. Believable enough to give you butterflies.